#i just wanna live in the woods with 5 dogs | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

anticomedygarden · 8 months

Text

England's got a new queen! part 5

part one | ao3 link

June is awoken from a dreamless sleep by a horribly shrill noise - her phone chiming.

Anxiety builds within her. Everytime her phone had gone off in the last four days, it had been bad news.

Ugh. Might as well bite the bullet.

Before she can roll over and look at the offending hunk of metal, a voice in the dark says, deathly calm, "June."

She shoots up, ramrod straight. "What is it? What happened?" Maybe someone found Alex and Henry, or maybe something happened in England, or, oh god, what if the bad guys found Alex and Henry and sent a ransom demand or something?

It's too dark to see his expression, but in the low light of his phone, she thinks he looks surprised, maybe even excited, but not upset, and she puts her catastrophizing away for the moment.

Pez sits up. "Breaking news: Queen Mary dead after weekend of uncertainty, long live Queen Catherine." He looks up at her then, eyes bright. "She's dead."

June feels her mouth start to tug into a smile. "I can't believe it."

Suddenly, her door bangs open, and they look over to see Nora's wild silhouette in the doorway. There's a beat of silence before she screams, "She's fucking dead!"

Several things happen very quickly after that.

First, Pez flicks the lamp on, bathing the room in low light, and Nora flops onto the bed while turning on "Killer Queen." They don't bother to close the door.

June grabs a bottle of champagne out of her nightstand that she keeps for events like this and pops it, eliciting a scream from both Pez and Nora.

Somehow, glitter is acquired and spread throughout the room. She can still barely see anything, but the atmosphere is tangible, practically electric, and she feels like she can see everything down to the little hammerhead sharks on Nora's shorts.

For a second, she looks across the hall to Alex's open door, expecting to see him walking over to celebrate with them and suddenly remembers he's in Colorado.

Then, something terrible occurs to her. Now that Mary is dead, what if the alleged murderer moves on to another target? What if they already have?

She looks down at the champagne in her hands and suddenly wishes she could unpop it.

Sometime around midnight, Henry and Alex emerge from the woods from a much tamer and well planned hike, and, after a quick shower, settle down at the kitchen table to eat some more eggs because they need to finish them before they go home.

Cash is presumably in the second bedroom asleep because he didn't take a three hour 'nap' in the middle of the day, so when the loud popping noises start, Alex has to fight the urge to go wake him up.

It's a good thing he grew up in Texas and knows the difference between fireworks and gunshots. Henry, however, does not.

"Jesus christ," his boyfriend gasps. "Is that the sound of one of those backyard shooting ranges you told me about?"

Alex shakes his head, grinning. "No, babe, that's just fireworks."

Henry nods, though he seems unconvinced. "Why are people shooting off fireworks right now?"

Alex shrugs. "I don't know. Firework laws aren't really enforced out here." Back in Texas, people would set them off all summer any time of day. One of his earliest memories is from someone setting off a firecracker at 11 in the morning on a Tuesday, and they weren't even rural.

Some more pops went off, and Henry shudders. "Isn't that annoying?"

Alex spreads his arms. "Welcome to America. Eat your eggs."

Henry rolls his eyes fondly and does what he's told, and Alex turns to check on David. The dog is fine, just sitting on the floor begging for food. That's much better than Liam's old dog who used to pee anytime fireworks went off.

An idea begins to form in his head. "Do you wanna go watch them?" Before Henry can answer, he stands and says, "Yeah, let's go watch them."

He pulls Henry out the front door onto the porch and lifts himself onto the handrail.

"Alex, what the hell are you doing?" Henry asks, alarmed.

Alex grabs onto the edge of the roof. "Come boost me."

Henry makes no move to help him. "Alex, you're going to fall and break something. Get down."

"Don't you wanna see the fireworks?" Alex can already see some of them from his place on the handrail. One particularly risky up later and he can see all of them, beautiful shimmering bursts of light in the night sky. It's a bit of a downer since the last few nights they could see millions of stars without all the light pollution, but this is cool, too.

Henry's head pops out from under the edge of the roof.

"I'm still alive!" Alex exclaims. "Get up here."

Shaking his head, Henry follows Alex up to the roof, and they both lay back to watch the fireworks.

After a while, Henry says, "Alright, they are very pretty. I can see why you Americans are so obsessed with them."

Alex smirks. "Wait til you hear the ones that just explode and nothing else."

"Wonderful." A few more minutes pass. Henry points up into the sky. "That one looks like the Irish flag."

Alex follows his line of sight to see the remnants of green, white, and orange fireworks all in a row.

The people setting them off must only have the five colors, because next to it is red, white, and blue, and after that- "That one looks like India's flag." It's orange on top and green on bottom with white in the middle and blue in the very center.

"Imagine if your Gran saw this," Alex says, eliciting a laugh out of Henry. "It would probably kill her."

"Indeed."

"When are Alex and Henry supposed to get back?" Nora asks.

She and June are walking down a hallway in the Residence to the kitchens for lunch by themselves since Pez had camped himself in the library. He said he needed the distraction to keep from checking Twitter over and over again.

"They're supposed to land at 9," June answers, "but that's assuming they haven't been murdered or kidnapped."

"So they should still get here around 9, then?"

They turn a corner into a hallway lines with windows, now facing the front lawn. "I think so." She says it nonchalantly, as if she didn't bug Amy to tell her everything about their return trip for twenty minutes straight.

Nora opens her mouth to say something else, but before she can, something slams into the window next to them, hard enough to crack.

Hard enough to crack US military grade bullet-resistant glass.

They both stop in their tracks.

"Oh my god," June breathes. "Oh my god!"

She grabs Nora's hand, and they turn and run.

On the way to the airstrip, Alex makes a valiant effort to convince Cash to turn the car around and go back to the cabin, but the bodyguard is not swayed, tragically, and soon they're boarding the aircraft.

As soon as they sit down, Cash comes out of the cockpit. "Slight change of plans."

Alex's head shoots up. "What happened?"

Cash waves a hand, face revealing nothing. "Nothing bad, we're just landing in DC instead of New York."

Henry narrows his eyes. "Why?"

"You'll find out when we get there." Then, he sits down and opens his crossword book.

What an ass.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," June gasps as they come up the hall to find Amy.

She has just enough time to look alarmed and slightly scared before June and Nora are talking over each other.

"Amy, there's a-"

"Something hit the window-"

"-front hallway-"

"-glass cracked-"

"Girls!" Amy exclaims. "One at a time. June first.

June clears her throat. "We were walking in the North Hallway when something hit it really hard and it cracked."

"Oh, shit," Amy says. "Go to an internal room and stay there until I give the all clear." Then, she turns around and says something into her wrist mic and walks away, leaving June and Nora to panic in her wake.

When Henry and Alex land in DC, they're shepherded right into a Secret Service vehicle, and, in a move shocking everyone, Henry is the first to go for his phone.

Alex puts a hand on his arm. "Why don't we wait until we get to the Residence? Since we've had such a great time?"

Henry looks uneasy but puts his phone back in his pocket.

Nora and June file into the same sitting room that had been the setting for much of the past four days to see Oscar, Raphael, Leo, and Pez already there.

"Where's Mom?" June asks, already on high alert.

"She's on her way," Oscar answers, though he looks skeptical. Ellen never really seemed to believe in the threat, so it wouldn't be a surprise if she kept working until Amy forced her to stop.

June and Nora both sit down, and they all exchange nervous glances. The tension is thick enough to feel like humidity, and it isn't hard to tell that whatever is going on is at its peak.

This bullshit ends tonight.

The car stops slowly at a red light, and Alex can feel himself starting to get antsy. It's not a welcome feeling, not after their vacation, but now that he knows something is going on, he can't stop thinking about it. He still doesn't want to check his phone, though.

The light turns green, and the car starts rolling again.

Abruptly, it stops again, and Alex chokes on the seatbelt.

"Sorry, guys, someone ran the red," Cash says from the front seat.

"It's fine," Henry gasps.

In no time at all, they're pulling up to the White House.

Henry grasps his hand. "You ready?"

He's not, but he nods anyway.

It's obvious before they even walk in that something's wrong. For one, no one is there to greet them. For two, staffers are running around like crazed lunatics without acknowledging either of them.

Then, there's the fact that Cash immediately peels away with nothing but a, "Gotta go do something."

They look at each other, baffled.

Eventually, they find a family sitting room that seems to have people in it.

"-and the cracked window was because of a goose, not a bullet," Amy is saying.

Alex's eyebrows raise. "What the hell?" He pushes forward into the room. "What's going on?"

"Alex!" June shouts, running into his arms. "You're alive!"

If Alex thought he couldn't get more alarmed, he was wrong. "Yeah...Anyone wanna tell me what's going on?"

June pulls back, allowing Alex to finally get a look at the room. Both his parents, Leo, Nora, Pez, and Amy are seated around the room, apparently having some kind of meeting.

"You have a lot to catch up on," June says. "But the biggest thing you need to know is that the Queen died, and there is no assassin."

Alex's brain whites out for a second. "What?"

"You heard her right," Pez confirms. "Don't worry, darlings, we'll throw a real party once the mourning period is over."

Right. Because now they have to go to England so Henry can participate in lawful grief. Because the Queen is dead. And the monarchy is stupid.

Next to him, Henry rubs his eyes. "...Huh."

Leo takes pity on them. "Welcome back, guys!"

Welcome, indeed.

5 notes · View notes

whisker-biscuit · 11 months

Text

The Lines We Cross: Chapter 5

Last Call

---------------------------------

Cause you're a force of nature Look at what you've done I can taste the danger But I don't wanna run

---------------------------------

Muggshot’s hotel lobby was quiet. A few dogs lounged about on the center stairs, bored out of their minds but stuck on guard duty; the most excitement they’d seen in the last hour had been their boss hauling a cowed dalmatian out of the building before retreating back to his penthouse suit.

Then the front doors got busted in by the force of a single, powerful kick.

The guards all jumped up at once, but they had no time to react before the intruder made her first move. Inspector Fox shot three rapid electric bullets at point blank range and with pin-point accuracy. Her targets hit the ground almost simultaneously, and the lobby turned quiet once more.

Behind the cop who was now reloading her weapon, a raccoon carefully stepped over shattered wood as he made his way into the room. His eyes trailed up the stairway, falling upon the giant model of the bulldog’s face in all its self-centered glory where it had been built into the wall like a bulbous growth.

“Ugh.” Sly hated it. He wanted to rip that stupid cigar out of its mouth and then use it to burn the whole thing down. “Look at that ugly mug.”

“It is…certainly a very bold statement,” Inspector Fox replied with a wrinkled nose, not entirely knowing the reason for his disdain but obviously agreeing with it. “Even among all the egotistical types I’ve come across in the past.”

He made a face and turned to his left, where what used to be the hotel’s front reception desk now sat empty, devoid of practically every room key in the building. There was a noticeable closed-off cubby among the shelves behind the desk with a heavy-duty padlock keeping it shut.

“I think we found our secret way to the penthouse,” the raccoon said, gesturing to the spot.

She followed the direction of his hand and raised one eyebrow. Taking out the key they had gotten by the skin of their teeth, she walked around the side of the desk and carefully inserted it into the lock.

It turned with a loud click. The padlock came undone and she pulled open the rough wooden cover to reveal a remarkably shiny metal lever. The fox made a move as if to yank on it, then paused and drew her hand back cautiously.

“What if it’s a trap?” She stared at the lever as if it might grow teeth to bite her if she touched it. “That criminal could have said anything to make me let him go. It might be an alarm or something.”

“It’ll work.”

The cop shot him a look. “How can you be sure?”

“I just am.”

He met her gaze head-on, completely unfazed in the wake of her suspicious squinting. Let her try to crack through his poker face – she wasn't the first and she'd be as unsuccessful as all the others before her.

Then, as if taking his calm assertion as a challenge, she reached over and pulled the lever without breaking eye contact with him. There was a loud rumble and suddenly that giant bulldog face at the top of the stairs opened its mouth to reveal the promised secret elevator.

“Would you look at that,” Sly said coolly while Inspector Fox gaped. “Guess I was right and the dog wasn’t lying after all.”

“Yeah, well.” She closed her mouth and folded her arms in an obvious attempt to save face. “I suppose even criminals can tell the truth. Sometimes.”

He snorted, beginning to turn away. “Uh huh. Anyway, that should lead straight to Muggshot’s personal rooms. Now that you’ve got your straight path, you can wait for – what are you doing?”

The fox was heading up the stairs towards the open passage. She paused to look back at him with a raised eyebrow.

“What does it look like I’m doing? I’m going to apprehend Muggshot if he’s up there!”

“But – you –” Now it was the raccoon’s turn to gape. “Why? All you need to do to keep your job is lead your buddies straight to him, not try to take him down alone!”

“I risked this entire case and potentially the lives of my fellow officers. I can’t only do the bare minimum for reparations. If there’s a chance to apprehend such a dangerous individual with as few casualties as possible, I have to take it.”

She explained it so simply, so matter-of-factly, as if she was talking about writing a heartfelt apology letter instead of taking on the physically-strongest member of the Fiendish Five without backup or even a proper weapon. It was stupid, and foolish, and practically suicidal.

It made Sly angry.

“Are you sure it’s not just to show off to your boss so he doesn’t demote you?” He accused. “Trying to get all the glory before anyone else does to heal your wounded ego?”

The cop’s face pinched up in shock and anger, and he wondered with a touch of smugness if this was the first time a “civilian” had ever called her out.

She turned abruptly on her heel before he could dig that in, too. “Believe whatever you want. I’m going to confront Muggshot. Stay here where it's safe.”

Sly shook his head with a scoff. The blind, overconfident arrogance of this woman was on a whole other level. He should have known she was no different than the rest of them.

Inspector Fox stepped into the elevator, then turned to look at him one last time before the doors closed. He hadn’t moved an inch, watching her hold her head high like she was really about to make a difference.

The exact moment they disappeared from each other’s sight, the raccoon shot off like a rocket, taking the stairs two at a time as he started ascending the hotel floor by floor as high as he could go. “Stay here”, she’d said to a civilian. But Sly wasn’t a civilian, and he definitely wasn’t going to let this golden opportunity go to waste.

Technically, only the secret elevator could reach the top floor, but that was from inside the building. There were still windows up there, just as there were on every other floor, and Sly could see them as he climbed onto the outside ledge and craned his neck upwards. There was his old room in the same place he’d clocked it when he’d first come here with the cop, obvious by the bars Muggshot had installed the minute he’d settled on this being his base of operations. And two windows to the left of that, easily reachable with some careful scaling, was the mobster’s personal office.

Sly pulled his cane out of his backpack and extended it to its true length for the second time in one night. The Five had let him keep it all these years as a form of mockery, taunting him for his clumsiness with it, daring him to learn how to use it without any help from his father or his book. Daring him to impress them.

Well, here I go, assholes, he thought as he aimed the hooked end for the ledge above him in preparation for a jump.

Eat your fucking hearts out.

---------------------------------

Carmelita wasn’t entirely sure what she’d been expecting when she reached the top floor. Piles of guns and cash everywhere, maybe, or more of the gangster’s imagery strewn about. What she hadn’t expected was to step into a large open room of what had probably once been a ballroom or club, expensive crystalline lamps scattered all across the purple carpet, and Muggshot himself sitting on a stolen plush chair on the other side of it all. She froze as they locked eyes, and her shock pistol was whipped out of her holster in an instant to aim up at him.

For his part, the bulldog looked just as surprised as she was.

“Wha?” He leaned forward in his chair, sounding completely bewildered. “My boys have been yapping about some big scary cop runnin’ around taking them down and, heh, and…and this is it? You’re the monkey wrench in my operation? Some scrawny chick with a pea shooter?”

The inspector inhaled, deep and steadying, and took a few steps forward. “Muggshot. You are under arrest. Put your hands up where I can see them and don’t make any sudden moves.”

Her free hand flashed her badge by the light of a nearby lamp. The mobster squinted at it, unbothered to even consider complying to her command.

“Ey, wait a second…I’ve seen that logo before.”

“I should hope so,” she snapped, quickly losing patience, “considering it belongs to me – Inspector Carmelita Fox.”

“Inspector? Wow. You’re with Interpol?” Muggshot leaned back again as if physically struck with offense. Still, his body language remained relaxed. “They really just let any average joe have a badge these days, huh?”

“Not just anyone – someone who is about to apprehend you for multiple instances of grand larceny, domestic terrorism, illegal gambling, and a whole other list of charges. Now, are you going to give yourself up?"

Now the bulldog finally tensed, but not in fear or worry. In fury.

“Wha-ha-ha-ha-what, are you kidding?” He stood up, staring her down, and she could see his raised hackles clear across the room. “You break into my place, attack my boys, trash the joint – I feel transgressed and violated!”

Carmelita tensed herself as he unholstered two huge, custom-made pistols.

“Let’s rock!”

---------------------------------

Muggshot’s private office was filled with a lot more paperwork than one might expect from the meathead mobster, but most of what was probably juicy evidence that would have Interpol salivating was completely ignored by Sly as he started sweeping aside papers and pulling open drawers. The bottom drawer of the desk was full of stacks of cash, and the raccoon poached a strap of twenties without even slowing down in his search.

When the desk proved fruitless for what he was really after, he moved ahead to the nearest bookshelf and began flipping through binders filled haphazardly to the brim with God knew what – tax evasions schemes and casino renovation plans, probably.

A booklet fell out between the pages of one such binder, hitting the floor with a solid enough sound to catch Sly’s attention. When he glanced downwards, his own face stared back.

It was the passport the Five had forged for him, back when they had still used public airlines to ferry him between them before Muggshot had eventually gotten his own private plane. Sly picked it up and quickly leafed through it; the expiration date wasn’t set for another two or so years, which meant it was something he could use. He pocketed it alongside the appropriated cash and kept moving.

Almost a minute had passed from when he’d started ransacking the room, and nothing was turning up. The raccoon could hear bullets flying from down the hall, and his fur prickled with the knowledge that any moment those sounds would stop and he’d be fully out of time. He needed to get out of here, but he couldn’t leave without finding what he was looking for, but he couldn’t find any hint of where –

His eyes alighted on a giant portrait of Muggshot’s mother hanging on the wall behind the desk chair. As if compelled by some ancient instinct, Sly made a beeline for the thing. He lifted the heavy metal frame with no small amount of difficulty and set it carefully aside, revealing a hidden safe embedded into the wall.

It would have been laughable to see one of the only things Muggshot had learned from Conner Cooper’s legacy being how he’d hidden the Thievius Raccoonus, if it weren’t even more infuriating. The raccoon gritted his teeth and clenched his cane tight in his hand a moment to dispel the familiar wave of rage threatening to cloud his mind. He could be angry later, when he had stolen his pages back and was safely out of Mesa. Right now, he just needed to focus.

It was a fairly standard wall safe with an old-fashioned dial lock. Sly spun it several times to wipe it, then pressed his ear against the safe’s side and placed careful fingers to the knob. He closed his eyes as he slowly began turning the dial to the right.

Tuning out the world around him to hear only the slightest clicking beneath was second-nature by now. Numbers were passed one by one in a careful, gradual method, oblivious to the time crunch he was on. Haste makes waste – and gets you wasted. Even after all this time, his father’s voice was a powerful echo in his head. An echo that was right, to boot. He couldn’t afford to rush these things.

The first number of the combination was hit with a nearly imperceptible click of inner gears. Sly stilled his hand, made sure he could still hear Muggshot’s gun going off, then started running the dial counterclockwise for the next one.

---------------------------------

A bullet whizzed through the air, cleaving the space Carmelita had occupied milliseconds ago as she ducked behind another crystal lamp. She didn’t know why the mobster had so many of these things, nor why they were bullet-proof, but she wasn’t about to question the only thing protecting her in this fight.

Halfway across the room, Muggshot growled when his shot missed, and began closing the distance between them way too quickly for someone his size. The inspector felt her heart pounding in her chest with every thump of his fists against the ground.

“You got a lotta nerve comin’ after a guy in his own home!” He hollered, firing again when she sprinted for more cover farther away. It ricocheted into the nearest window and shattered the glass into a thousand shards. “Ain’t there something in the cop rulebook about needin’ a warrant to do that?”

“Only if it was your rightfully owned property to begin with!” She couldn’t help yelling right back despite knowing that heckling criminals always made things worse. At least it gave her a little time to reload her own weapon as he sputtered and raged like an angry toddler.

Her original strategy when she’d come here was to intimidate Muggshot into surrendering quietly, and hitting him with a powerful shock or two if he refused. But he’d tanked four of her shots already without even flinching, and all it would take was one stray bullet from his end to put her down for the count. She was surviving on a mix of adrenaline, training, and pure dumb luck, and they both knew it.

Briefly she considered trying to flee for the elevator, to escape to the ground floor where it’d be easier to hide and snipe from an actually safe distance, but that idea was nixed as she remembered the raccoon waiting for her in the lobby. Even if she made it all the way down there unharmed, he didn’t have the instincts to survive a shootout, and she was not going to put the civilian she’d rescued in danger for a second time tonight.

Another bullet hissed just over her head. Inspector Fox took the cue to throw herself forward into a sprint for the next nearest lamp, aiming and firing her pistol wildly in his direction. The sounds of a grunt and electricity sparking against flesh weren’t very satisfying when it was followed by an almost literal hail of gunfire right on her heels.

She needed a new plan fast. There was only so much ammo she had on her, compared to Muggshot who seemed to pull spare bullets straight from thin air. Additionally, her breathing was labored, going on ragged, and at this rate it was only a matter of time before she was too slow to dodge a shot.

Rounding another crystal lamp - why were there so many lamps?! - Carmelita nearly tripped on something thin and long. It was an electrical wire attached to the base of the appliance, trailing out into the dark corners of the huge ballroom. Now that she had noticed, they were spread all across the floor, connected to every lamp and no doubt plugged into various outlets.

The lamps were all turned off, but if those outlets were live…

Muggshot growled, much closer than before, and there was no time to make a different decision. The inspector grabbed the wire, snapped it off the lamp, and jammed the newly-free end into the charge port of her shock pistol. She locked her jaw, steeled her nerves, and threw herself out in the open.

She could see the mobster react almost in slow motion – the bobbing of his head and the swivel of his body as he turned to aim both guns at her. But she had already been aiming when she’d jumped out from behind her cover, and those precious few seconds were all she needed to pull the trigger with Muggshot’s colossal chest directly in her crosshairs.

Her pistol lit up as if on fire, burning under her hand, and the kickback was enough to knock her flat on her back. She gasped for air as color exploded somewhere down in front of her, followed by a flickering of the chandelier above.

The fox lifted herself on one elbow just in time to watch Muggshot hit the floor like a sack of bricks. Smoke steamed lightly off his clothes and he twitched with electricity – then went still.

He was down for the count.

Carmelita heaved a sigh both relieved and exhausted, and let her head fall back against the carpet. She’d get up to properly disarm and restrain him in a second.

Right now, she just…needed a moment to catch her breath.

---------------------------------

They were in his hands. The pages were actually in his hands.

Sly crouched against the wall under the safe, overwhelmed with contradicting emotions as he stared down at the eight or so pages held between trembling fingers. They were crumpled, and stained, and torn violently at the edges, but they were here. Real. In his possession again.

His free hand came up to his mouth as nausea threatened to overwhelm him. He was ecstatic. He was spellbound. He was – he was –

Eight years old and they’re tearing apart the book why are they doing that why isn’t dad getting up –

Ten years old and they’re taunting you with it laughing at you saying you’ll never read those pages never be a real Cooper –

Thirteen years old and gold eyes are staring you down and your chest hurts and let’s make a deal, Sly Cooper, you and I –

The lights suddenly flickered, startling him out of his head and into the real world again. Sly fumbled for his backpack, stuffing the pages as quickly but delicately into the front pocket as he could, and managed to stand on only slightly-shaking legs. The sound of bullets had stopped.

If there had ever been a sign that he was out of time, it was that.

Scaling back down the outer side of the building was a lot harder than going up, mostly because he was still on some terrible, wonderful high of elation and terror. The raccoon clambered back in through a lower-level window, then started a light jog down the stairway until he was on the first floor again. He could hear sirens somewhere in the distance. It was impossible to tell whether those were Muggshot’s goons sounding an alarm or the actual cops finally arriving to help their Interpol inspector.

Didn’t matter much either way when he was going to be long gone before they ever showed up.

Sly passed the bulldog’s giant head-elevator without a second glance, but he began to slow as he reached the lobby’s front desk where he’d been told to wait. He didn’t know why he stopped when his eyes landed on that lever, but he did.

She was probably long-dead. No one went toe-to-toe with Muggshot and came out the other end without several bullets in their chest. He’d seen it firsthand, too many times to count. Even so, the raccoon found himself standing there, looking up at the elevator entrance, as if waiting to confirm the outcome for some reason he couldn’t name.

Maybe it was because she was one of the few people who’d shown real kindness and respect to him in the last eleven years, even if it was under the false assumption that he wasn’t a criminal. Maybe it was because the realization still hadn’t quite sunk in that he was finally free, finally able to go where he wanted and do what he wanted without it being at the beck and call of someone else.

Maybe he was just morbidly curious.

Whatever the reason, Sly decided to wait a minute. Just one minute. Sixty seconds to count down and see if anyone would come out, and then he’d blast out of here.

With fifteen seconds left to spare, the elevator started rumbling. The raccoon’s heart leapt into his throat and he jumped over the lobby desk to hide behind it, peeking carefully over the counter as the lift came to a stop and the doors opened.

Sly stared, and couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

Out came Inspector Carmelita Fox, fully alive if not extremely worn-out, and without so much as a scratch on her body. She trudged down the shallow stairs and stopped only when she realized that her temporary ally wasn’t there to greet her. She lifted tired yet triumphant eyes to meet those of the raccoon who was still crouched behind the desk with his mouth agape.

“I did it, Ringtail,” she said, with an exhausted smile. “Muggshot’s reign over Mesa is no more.”

For the first time in years, Sly was at a loss for words.

---------------------------------

A/N: Aaaand that's the end of Muggshot! One down, four to go.

This was one of the first chapters I finalized months ago when I first started writing this fic out. It was really fun trying to merge the game's boss fight with how Carmelita would have to go about it, and how that might look like with just a tiny bit more realism.

Thanks again for reading!

#sly cooper #carmelita fox #muggshot #fanfiction

4 notes · View notes

eohpmdsteams · 1 year

Text

Fight For Life

(part 3 of mission 5!)

Blood

Thats all Bluey could smell wafting around her as massive black claws wrapped around her tiny body and ripped her from the ground and flew off with her. But it wasn’t her blood that she smelled, it wasn’t even fresh blood or just one persons, but very very old yet several very familiar scents.

While the claws that held her were covered in fresh blood by some unsuspecting victim she couldn’t make out if she knew or not the raggedy faded shawl brown from dried blood that dangled in her face held smells she knew. She could smell her mother, her father, her grandparents…and so many more who stained that shawl. When Bluey looked up all she saw was the frenzied face of a Yamask with its eyes laser focused ahead of it as it raced away from Bastion and Jenga who were hot on this ghosts tail. As Bluey looked down towards the others, she managed to get a look at the golden mask attached to the tail of the Yamask.

While it was impossible to not know who a Yamask was in the past due to their golden mask that was a resemblance of their once living face, it was almost impossible to make out the face on this mask as it had been clawed at and scratched away. The scattered direction and depth of the gouges in the gold made it clear it was done out of sheer anger and hatred. Did She do this to herself? What made her hate her own face? It was questions Bluey was certain she knew the answer to, some part of this Yamask had to have hated what it did.

“Let her go, Scarlet!” Jenga barked as he flung a stone that ricocheted off the mask with a loud clang. In response to the sudden pain the Yamask let out a gargled scream and dropped Bluey as her focused shifted from stealing the Pawniard, to mauling whoever dare strike her.

Bluey let off a shriek as she fell towards the ground, clenching her eyes shut she braced for impact but instead was only slightly winded as she felt herself impact against Bastion’s chest after the massive Bisharp leapt to catch her before she hit the floor.

“N-Nice save again, Bash!” Bluey said shakily feeling a bit week in her legs having fallen several feet, “That was a close one…heh…heh.”

While Bluey steadied herself Bastion caught sight of the Yamask slamming into his grandfather, sending the old Sableye clattering to the ground, breaking off one of the gem shards on his back with a swift rake of her massive claws. Bastion hissed at the sight and charged into the Yamask sending her through a tree with a swift backhand. Sending shards of the dead burnt trunks scattering around the clearing from the impact.

“I forgot she followed me here from Sands.” Jenga winced as he sat up looking at the ruined remains of one of his gems with disdain like someone kicked his favorite dog, “She’s been nothing but a menace since reawakening. Sometimes I think she still has fragments of memory, but she always reminds me she’s just a beast now.”

“Wait so that Yamask is my mother? She came back and she’s still like this?!” Bluey exclaimed.

“Death and Undeath doesn’t seem to be a cure for it either I am afraid. I made the mistake thinking she may have been snapped out of it when I saw her climb out of her grave, especially when she was so keen of slowly following me, I thought she might of remembered me but every time I let her get too close, she never hesitated to attack me.”

The trio watched Yamask fling herself from the splintered trunk towards bastion and was once again sent careening through another tree sending more shards of wood splintering into the clearing.

“Physical attacks like that aren’t gonna do anything to her Bastion! You are only pissing her off!” Jenga said as Scarlet picked herself up again. Bastion shook his head at Jenga in a way of showing him that injuring her wasn’t his intent.

“Bastion if you gotta knock her out just do it cause she’s only gonna keep coming at us!” Bluey barked, “I know you may not wanna, cause she’s what’s left of my mom, but she not my mom anymore, she’s just like any other feral!”

Bastion looked at her hesitantly but nodded and the third time she lunged at them a thin dark sheen came over Bastion’s arm before he hit her hard with ‘Metal Claw’ which combined with Bluey using ‘Assurance’ sent Scarlet careening across the clearing and into the door of the library with a loud thud, leaving the Yamask crumpled to the ground from the super effective move.

“What brute’s making a mess of my library” A strange voice echoed from around them, “You’ve overstayed your welcome.”

“Wh-what was that?” Bluey said as she and Bastion looked around but saw no sign of where the voice came from.

“One of the guardians…It’s Azelf.” Jenga whispered and tried to make himself look smaller, “We’ve made too much of a ruckus.”

“Some guardian! A coward hiding in the woods, if you wanna fight just come out and do it! Or are you chicken?!” Bluey yelled into the forest only for a giggle to ring back.

“Why would I dirty my hands on a lower lifeform like you when I have a far more perfect specimen to do it for me? I’ll see to it that you destroy each other!”

A ripple of a white mystic fire rang through the forest like a tidal wave, it made Bluey shutter as the energy rippled over her, but the pained scream that came from bastion as he clung to his head and dropped to his knees, whipped Bluey’s attention from the voice to her partner.

“Bash, yo Bash are you okay?!” She called and ran over to him, “Whats wrong, bud are y-”

CLANG

Before Bluey could even finish her sentence she was sent clattering to the ground as she was smacked away with all the force Bastion could muster. She winced and pulled herself off the ground, “What the hell, Bastion?! What’s wrong with-”

But instead of Bluey’s red eyes meeting Bastion’s blue eyes, they were met with eyes that had a dull pink glow as this strange white and blue alien-esque creature slithered its long tendril like tails around his neck. For a moment Bastion seemed to react and looked at his hand in horror before looking back at Bluey and before he could say anything or respond in anyway the tails tightened and all expression except for sheer hatred was drained from Bastion’s face. He glared down at Bluey and for the first time in her life she was actually a bit frightened of him.

“What did you do to Bastion?!”

“I’m just borrowing him. I’ve watched how defensive you are of each other, so I’ll see to it you rip each other apart. If you wish to get into my Library you’ll have to get past me. But I’ll be honest the only way you will leave this forest is in a body bag.” Azelf sneered before with a flick of its tails the shine in Bastion’s eyes got brighter and he charged her.

Bluey had little time to react as she was slammed with a hard swipe of Bastion’s metal claw his size and strength having no issue sending the tiny Pawniard flying several feet and clattering with the loud scrap and groan of her metal against the rocks in front of the Library.

“Bluey?! Are you ok?” Percy shouted as he spotted her impact with the stone and her roll to a halt, “What did that?”

“Bastion” Bluey groaned as Bramble helped her up. Both brothers looked at her with shock

“Bastion did this? Why would Bastion ever hit you?”

“He’s…uhg…he-he’s been…bewitched by whatever took over…Drauzen! B-but I don’t know if anyone else has been bewitched.” She whined and shook the dirt and rubble from her dented metal, “As if this day couldn’t get worse.”

“Wait bewitched? Like what happened in Sandstone and Onyx city?”

“Yeah, exactly like that.”

What can we do to help?”

“I can handle Bastion; He might hit like a rockslide, but he won’t kill me. Just catch me if he throws me a third time.”

“Third time! He hit you twice and your still stand-” But before Percy could finish his sentence Bastion exploded from the tree line and made a B-line for them.

Bramble didn’t hesitate to launch ‘Pin Needles’ at Bastion which made the large Bisharp wince but he didn’t steer away from his target as he lowered himself and barreled full force with iron head into Bluey, as he mowed over her Azelf had grown board of just watching and placing itself in the middle of the group, cackled and let off a blast of horrible light from what must have been the use of ‘Signal Beam’.

Bramble and Percy winced from the sting of bright light, and Bluey barely managed to stand back up. Every part of her stung with a dull throbbing pain as she looked at Bastion who for a moment shook Azelf’s will off and he looked at Bluey with both confusion and seeing just how bruised and dented she was, horror as she charged at him, he didn’t even notice at first that her eyes were pink and not red.

The sharp pain of Bluey’s ‘Fury Swipes’ made Bastion grit his teeth as he tried to back away from her shaking his head in disbelief that she was attacking him. Why? Why was she attacking him? And why was she so injured?

And after she slashed at him several times she stopped and shook her head as if snapping out of a trance, “B-Bastion? Wait you snapped out of it thank the great mother!” She exclaimed before looking at his bleeding cuts, “Wait did…did I hit you? I-I’m sorry I’d never!”

“Uhg, that little one is so boring!” Azelf yawned, “She’s a durable little thing but does such little damage. The big one is far more fun.”

Bastion reached his hand out to gesture that he was fine but before he could respond again, he grabbed at his head and slashed at Bluey throwing her through a tree nearby.

“Bastion stop!” Percy shouted at him to get his attention off of Bluey, “What’s wrong with you?”

But Bastion didn’t respond and merely stood glaring at the other Bisharp and with the way he stood reminding the other how much bigger he truly was. With a flick of Azelf’s tail Bastion charged at Percy and the two Bisharp locked blades with a violent flash of light that must have been from the sparks of colliding metal.

“W-Woah! Easy Bastion, look I don’t wanna fight you. But you are really not giving me much of a choice man!” Percy grunted as he did his best to keep Bastion locked in place, damn he was heavy.

Azelf laughed, “You lot are so easy to move like pawns of a chess board! This is too eas- AH!” it yelped as Bramble filled its back with needles.

“That hurt you little brat!” Azelf shrieked as it let loose another Signal Beam that for a moment blinded the three ‘mon around it long enough for Bastion to break away from Percy, “Deal with that brat!”

Bastion lunged for Bramble but before his blades made contact with Bramble’s throat there was a flash of light followed by the loud shriek of metal on metal as Bastions blades were locked with another’s.

“Thats Enough!” Bluey shouted into his face, Making the Bisharp halt for a moment.

“I was hoping that last hit had killed you.”Azelf frowned before sneering, “Well second times the charm.”

Bluey buckled a bit under the new force of weight coming from Bastion pressing his blades full force into her own, running out of options given her already weakened state she groaned, “I’m sorry buddy please understand this is for your own good!”

With that she focused all the energy she could into what she was about to do, positioning herself just right, she slammed her leg will all the force she could muster between the Bisharps legs. The pain that radiated through Bastion made him give a high-pitched gasp of a whine while through the shared link with Azelf even the mythical nearly collapsed from the pain as the Bisharp collapsed at Bluey’s legs curled in a fetal position with his hands between his legs while Bramble and Percy both winced having witnessed it.

“Bastion would never turn his blades on his family or his friends! And I’ll die before I ever let a bastard like you make him take the life of anyone he cares about! And for your sheer audacity of forcing him to live through that you’re gonna be the one leaving this forest in a hearse!” Bluey screamed as she charged the Azelf who was still reeling from the pain it experienced through Bastion.

Before the Azelf could react to what was happening it felt the horrible burning sting of Bluey’s blades against its chest as she left a deep X shape gash. The pain from the super effective move was anguishing and as Azelf glared at Bluey, it shrieked again this time as Percy slammed it int he back with his own ‘Assurance’ and Bramble wasted no time peppering it with ‘Pin Needle’ after ‘Pin Needle’.

Seeing as it was vastly outnumbered as losing control over the situation and several other ‘mon it had taken control of Azelf hissed at the group and attempted to stand its ground, but little did it know it had done the most foolish thing possible. It had struck the metaphorical hornet’s nest and as it tried to gain a better vantage point it was snatched from the air by the rake of Bluey’s ‘Night Slash.’

As Azelf hit the ground it tried to let out another Signal Beam but had failed, why had it failed? Then it realized the anguish it was feeling it should have gone away already, but it handn’t, it wasn’t just from the link to the Bisharp. Azelf whirled and looked over at Bastion who was shakily standing up.

“YOU! You used Torment on me?!” Azelf screamed as it was slashed this time by Percy.

“Serves you right!” Bluey barked.

Azelf let off a blast of psychic energy but watched to its own horror as the energy reflected off Bluey’s metal hide.

“Those tricks won’t work on any of us.” Bluey growled as she moved closer to the Azelf with her focus steel set on ripping it apart with her own claws.

Azelf was bristling from the rage it felt and having focused too hard on this small group it had quickly lost all control over the situation as it couldn’t keep its influence spread far enough if it continued to focus solely on them. Its injuries were also severe enough it would be foolish to attempt to take on this group now that they’d figured out a way to break its hold. Finally, having concluded its best strategy for the situation it waited until the four charged it again and with a snarl followed by a flash of light vanished as Bluey’s claws sliced the ground where it once stood.

She reeled back with a growl seeing that it got away. Taking a moment to scan the area for it and seeing it was long gone she sighed, “C’mon we have to help the others.”

-----------

Word Count: 2,610 Items used: -one move tm ticket (Bluey Learned X-SCIZZOR!) -one evolution ticket (Bluey evolved into Bisharp! Bluey learned Metal Claw!) Bluey's new move set: X-Scizzor, Metal Claw, Night Slash, Assurance

#blueythepawniard #bastionthepawniard #bastionthebisharp #percythebisharp #bramblethecacturne #azelf #group related #group entry #group mission entry

6 notes · View notes

miscellaneous--bones · 1 year

Text

shows everyone this oc i made n folks love her and then 2 minutes later come out with new ocs that im even more obsessed with like haha sike sorry. i was gonna wait until i had more drawings of howl but ive already been sittin on em a couple days so yk

anyway these are what came from that doodle page mess from a minute ago, goose was the first but i needed an oc who would work to be shipped w snatcher so then i made howl and decided there were 5 of them. they're supposed to be mostly borzoi/italian greyhound mixes? idk. either way they run on ahit rules but i might use em in other places too idk yet. Summary of their characters are below the cut

so they're a litter of 5 and no one is keeping track of whose oldest or youngest or whatever

unusual i know but i also cant figure out where i want them to be anyway so shut ur face

we'll just go left to right from the top

somewhere on her travels goose ran into hk and bow and was worried about these strange children being alone in space so she decided to come with them and like they arent gonna complain about their new dog

shes not the best with other people but she takes good care of them both and keeps them protected and fed and whatnot.

it works its cute

shes the only one who has a collar because shes the only one who has a person out of her siblings

nk n then howl! howls got a lot going on

they got a fairly dinky ship when they left it was sturdy enough but like not Good good yk

and at some point way before hattie and bow and goose end up there, they pass over harbor because theyre tryna figure out if they wanna stop for a supply run or not and the mafia shows up n makes trouble ofc

she gets the mafia to leave her alone but in the process ends up crash landing somewhere near subcon (not sure if its like in the woods or just off the borders but close enough either way)

in the crash tho, a bunch of time pieces shatter n get fucked up and end up scattered across time

she has to go through and try to clean all THAT up because plain n simple those things are hard to get and just leaving a jumbled mess like that it Very Not Safe

in this whole debacle her family dont know whats happened and the ship is kind of undocumented because the crash basically happened forever ago but also it hasnt yet but also it never did?? so like. shes missing for a good decade before shes finally back to her present (by this time hat n bow have come n gone so she missed goose anyway)

while she was going through time collecting time peices, she got in whole heeps of trouble and while its only been 10 years in her present it feels like its been at least 50

shes gotten acused of witchcraft, cursed about 5 times over, there was that one time she was thrown in a dungeon for 7 years for disrespecting a king or something

point is they came back fucked up

they're half undead and their soul is a little bit missing because someone stole it at some point and they only barely got it back a little bit. also cursed to be tied to shadows so being in the sun too long isnt very good for them.

ive also been playing with the idea they were cursed to live either other people's spirits and energies OR their flesh. not sure which yet

i do feel like it'd be nice if they and snatcher could end out with a deal where he eats the souls and she eats the bodies. or something

this whole change of theirs is supposed to be shown by them loosing their white on their face. theyre the one laying down in the last drawings which is supposed to be them while their in college years and shes got her white face. she looses it when she gets all tied up in the darkness thing. she also gets taller than her siblings they were the shortest originally

neway im till daydreaming abt the whole thing so yk

the other siblings are less important but still cute

duke is also an astronaut but his explorations tend to go better apparently. he comes home with a cute alien boyfriend later

paris owns a boutique that brandy helps her out with- they stayed on their home planet together with their parents when the others went to space.

speaking of, brandy is rlly nice

aside from her different markings which always set her apart real nice shes also trans. so grew up a little bit othered but still very very loved and also her and paris are besties obvi

brandy is good i like her a lot. i think shes be like second eldest if not eldest eldest if i had a real order there

her and howl bond over having different markings from the otherwise when howl finally gets home :)

#art #oc #Goose #Howl #Duke #Paris #Brandy #goose n duke also used to be bffs as kids and goose grew up calling him duck #soz if its hard to figure out whos who when its not colored theyre supposed to be pretty simliar #hope its not TOO hard at least #neway im gon lay down n chill out

4 notes · View notes

broodygaming · 2 years

Text

So!! Exciting stuff on the ol’ homestead lol

It looks like we’re gonna be buyin our neighbors property. He’s had Issues (it’s a whole messy thing) and isn’t keeping up with it and wants to just reset and do something smaller. He’s gonna live on the property in a trailer (we’re trying to find one rn) until he saves up some money and then goes and does His Thing.

It’s 5 acres and a 2 bed mobile home. It’s gross and trashed rn but the structure is sound and the roof is relatively new. The property is as overgrown and hilly as the one I’m on now so nothing new. Perfect for goats. We have a lot of long term plans we’re trying to nail down. VERY exciting prospect of building a whole farm oasis from the ground up. And cool that we’re fairly familiar with the land and area since we’ve been here for almost 3 years now, just next door.

Is this the dude who shot my turkeys last year and sometimes goes on his porch to shout belligerently and sometimes would shoot his gun indiscriminately into the woods? Yes. But the cops have taken his guns away and they’re Very familiar with him and his mom has kindly stepped in to help him get his shit together. He’s gonna be on a month to month basis and my dog hates him so we’ll have warning if he comes close without permission. The hope is he doesn’t stay long and will go do his thing and idk disappear and never come back. He’s angry energy through and through. We all tried to help him and get him help and he’s dangerous and belligerent in response so 🤷‍♀️ whattya gonna do.

But! Don’t wanna get hopes up too high cuz it’s not set in stone. But it’s looking really good and I’m stoked! Outta my brothers space! I’ll get to paint the house (inside and out) however I want! Make a nice backyard and big goat pastures and big garden and fruit trees and a tree house and fire pit and a nice driveway that’s easy to turn around in! And a fire wood stove and a cute kitchen! 😍 it’s almost here!

#being neighbors with my brother is Not Ideal but whatever haha #worth it #I’m crazy excited to paint tbh #homesteading #farming #real estate

10 notes · View notes

autumnmoonsurveys · 4 months

Text

MONDAY, JANUARY 1, 2024 5:13 PM

Rooms of the House 🏡

🏡 Beginning Questions! 🏡

Do you currently live in a house, apartment, condo, dorm, or...?

House.

How many houses have you lived in?

This is the twelfth.

How many apartments have you lived in?

Technically, one. It was a small town-house style though, but owned by an apartment management company. Or five if you count the four half-doubles (regional term for “duplex” — a whole house split into two side-by-side where the inside mirrors each other.)

How many dorm rooms have you lived in?

None.

How many condos have you lived in?

My dad owned a townhouse-style condo as a second home, but I don’t consider myself to have “lived” there.

Have you ever been homeless?

No, thankfully.

Have you ever been close to being homeless or worried about becoming homeless?

How many people do you live with currently?

Five.

Have you ever lived alone?

The closest I ever came to living alone was when it was just my daughter and me when she was 2½-3 years old.

Do you prefer to live alone or with other people?

I have my own family, so…

Do you like the home you live in right now?

Yes!

Are you living in your dream house?

Pretty much.

What would your dream house look like?

Honestly, this checked all of our boxes: 5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, acreage, cleared land AND usable woods, long driveway, seclusion, barn for storage, AND plenty of room in the basement for seasonal storage, my husband’s gym, and his woodworking. 🤍 Bonus: a basketball half-court, we’re close to my mom, we’re within e-bike riding distance to a lake for fishing/kayaking (only 1 mile!), and a creek also runs through our woods! 🙏

What is your home decorating style?

Vintage, mostly. ‘70s-‘90s, specifically.

Would you ever want to become and interior designer?

No, but I wanted that career at 9 years old. Well, a decorator rather than designer.

Have you ever watched Trading Spaces?

Yeah, I was obsessed at 9. 😆

Have you ever considered becoming a realtor?

I have considered it, yes.

Does your home have a big yard?

We have about 50 acres. 20ish acres of cleared pastureland/“yard” and 30ish acres of woods.

What color was the home you grew up in?

Partially faded brick, partially beige/tan siding with orange-red decorative shutters & bay window trim.

Have you ever lived in a house that was on a street corner?

Once, in a duplex, but our half was the side closer inward. The house I grew up in was advertised as a corner lot; it was the only house on that side of the drive. We had 3/4 of an acre, so the house was more-so in the middle.

Do you have nice neighbors?

Yep.

Who is/was the worst neighbor you've ever had?

A historical society, in the past.

Have you ever called the cops on a neighbor?

No, but neighbors have called the cops on us thrice throughout my life. 👀 Once for camping in our own backyard, once for a fist fight with my husband’s ex when we first got together and she came to my house with a glass bottle in her hand 😳, and once for a loud argument. These were in 2009, 2015, and 2018, respectively.

Do you have a neighbor with annoying dogs that bark a lot?

Nah.

Have you ever had a neighbor that played loud music and partied all night long?

…No, we were that neighbor. 😬 That’s partially why we needed rural seclusion. We just wanna l-i-v-e. 😅

Do you have a swimming pool?

No.

Have you ever lived in a home with a swimming pool?

Yes, two of the twelve houses.

How long have you lived in your current place of residence?

3 months now.

Are you happy with where you're living right now?

YES.

Do you own a fire extinguisher? 🧯

Yes, two.

What are the names of three of your neighbors?

Melissa, Eric, and David.

Do you live in the city or in the country?

Country.

Do you live in a big city or small town?

In a teeny-tiny rural hamlet.

Do you like the area in which you live?

Yep.

Have you ever lived in a brick house?

Several.

Do you live on a busy street?

Negative. 😎

🏡 Living Room 🏡

Are you in the living room right now?

No, my bedroom.

What color are the walls in your living room?

Medium gray with a brown tone.

How many windows are in your living room? 🪟

9, plus the door.

How many couches are there? 🛋

One couch, one matching loveseat.

What color is your couch? 🛋

Brown.

How many chairs are there? 🪑

The matching loveseat + a cushioned oversized square stool.

What colors are the chairs?

Matching brown + green & purple funky stool.

Do you have art on the walls? 🖼

Yes.

Do you have any of your own artwork on the walls? 🖼

No.

Pick one piece of wall art in your living room. What does it look like?

A framed painted portrait of the historic train station in my hometown named after my family, that I am actually in. I was like five years old in the painting.

Do you have a big mandala tapestry hanging up on your wall?

No.

Do you have a TV?

Yes.

Is the floor carpeted, and if so, what color is the carpet?

No.

What are three big things you have in your living room?

Couch, wood-burning stove with a mantle, and long behind-the-couch table.

How many throw pillows do you have in your living room?

Three.

What is your favorite thing in your living room?

I really love our TV stand. 🤷‍♀️

When was the last time you had company over?

My mom and step-dad stopped by Christmas afternoon.

Is your home cluttered, or are you good at clearing space for living?

The latter.

Is there a bookshelf in your living room?

No.

Do you own a lot of books? 📚

Yep.

Are there any framed photographs in your living room?

Not at the moment.

Do you ever sleep in the living room?

Yeah.

🏡 Bedroom 🏡

How many windows are there in your bedroom? 🪟

Two + the door to our deck.

What size bed do you have? 🛏

Queen.

What does your bedspread or comforter look like?

Currently, a white/deep green/deep red plaid Sherpa bed blanket.

What color are the sheets on your bed right now?

Light brown.

How many pillows do you normally sleep with?

Two.

Do you sleep with a teddy bear? 🧸

No.

Do you have a dresser, a closet, or both?

Both.

Do you have a walk-in closet?

I have a regular double bi-fold closet and my husband uses the walk-thru closet (leads to our bathroom).

Do you own a lot of clothes?

Yes.

What is the color scheme in your bedroom?

No specific color scheme.

What color are the walls?

Very pale white-blue.

What color is the carpet or rug?

N/A

Is it carpeted?

No, laminate hardwood.

Do you have a desk in your room?

Not at the moment.

What time do you normally wake up in the morning? ⏰

6:15 during the school week.

Do you normally wake up to an alarm? ⏰

Yes.

Do you make your bed every day? 🛏

Yes.

Where do you keep your jewelry? 📿

A tray.

Do you have a full-length mirror?

Yes.

Is there art on the walls?

Yes.

Do you have any posters on the wall, and if so, what are they pictures of?

Everything is framed.

Do you have any of your own artwork on the walls? 🖼

No, but canvas art my daughter made me for Christmas.

Is there a bookshelf?

No, but we do have tons of books in our room and closet.

Do you keep a diary? 📔

I do.

Is there a bulletin board?

No.

What color is your dresser?

Cherry wood.

Is any of your furniture antique?

Vintage, but not antique.

Do you own a vase filled with fake flowers? 💐🏺

I have a vase filled with fake boxwood balls (vase filler).

What is your favorite thing about your bedroom?

View of the woods.

🏡 Bathroom 🏡

What color is your toilet? 🚽

White. This will be about our master bathroom en-suite.

Do you have a cover on your toilet seat?

No.

What does your shower curtain look like?

Do you own a clawfoot bathtub? 🛀

No.

Do you prefer showers or baths?

Showers.

What is your favorite type of shampoo and conditioner to use?

I’m not picky. I’m currently using the extra medicated Selsun Blue with It’s a 10.

What scent does your body wash have?

Currently, Aveeno Daily Moisturizing body wash.

What scent does your hand soap have? 🧴

Gingerbread bakery.

Do you have any art on the walls in your bathroom? 🖼

A framed picture of Tony Soprano smoking a cigar signed by James Gandolfini. 😂

What is the color scheme of your bathroom?

No specific color scheme.

Do you own a plunger? 🪠

Absolutely.

Is there a mirror in your bathroom? 🪞

Of course.

How many bathrooms does your home have?

Three full.

Is your bathroom big or small?

Average.

Have you ever done the "24 Hours in the Bathroom" challenge for a YouTube video?

…No.

....and if not, would you ever want to?

No.

Do you sing in the shower? 🚿 🎶

No.

🏡 Kitchen 🏡

What is your favorite thing to cook? 👩‍🍳

Any one-dish meals.

Do you have a stove?

Yes.

What color is your stove?

Ivory.

Which stove burner do you normally use?

Front left, the big one.

Have you ever had an accidental kitchen fire? 🔥

Only when I was four.

...and if yes, what happened, and what did you do?

My mom fell asleep in the middle of the night dealing with my newborn twin brothers while she was boiling bottle nipples. The water evaporated and the nipples caught fire, but thankfully it was put out before the firetrucks arrived. Ironically, this past summer that house burnt down. 😭

What color is your fridge?

Black.

What color is your kitchen sink?

Stainless steel.

What color is the current hand towel in your kitchen?

Black with white vertical stripes.

What was the last thing you microwaved?

Instant espresso. 😬

When was the last time you used the toaster?

A few days ago.

....and what was the last thing you toasted?

Chocolate chip waffles for my son.

Do you enjoy washing the dishes?

Not especially...

Do you have a dishwasher, or do you have to wash the dishes by hand?

We have a dishwasher, but we typically hand-wash our dishes as we go. We only need to use the dishwasher if we have a party or something.

Do you own a Magic Bullet?

No.

Is there a calendar on the wall in your kitchen? 📆

Just the boys’ school breakfast/lunch menu for the month.

....and if yes, what is this month's calendar picture?

No cute pictures. 😔 But each month is a different color. January is bright blue.

Do you have magnets on your fridge?

Yep, lots.

Pick three of your favorite magnets on your fridge- what do they look like?

An orange fancy letter R magnet that my daughter (Ryleigh) found underneath our fridge that was left behind at our old house, plus these two:

Do you have a little stepping stool you use in your kitchen when you have to reach stuff up high?

Yes, a retro pale yellow one.

What color are your kitchen cupboards?

Ivory.

Do you own a lot of silverware? 🥄

Enough. I don’t like to own too much of anything.

Do you have a big or small kitchen?

Decent.

Which do you use more: the toaster or the microwave?

Microwave.

Which do you use more: the microwave or the stove?

I use both about daily.

Have you ever accidentally left the stove on for hours?

No, but back in 2016 Greg left the oven on for most of the night once with pizza in it!

...and if yes, did it start a fire?

No, thankfully.

🏡 Dining Room 🏡

What color is your kitchen table?

We have a kitchen peninsula with four barstools, then behind it is the dining area, but we do not currently have a dining table.

How many chairs are at your kitchen table?

How often do you eat at the table?

At the bar, regularly.

Is there a chandelier hanging above the table?

No, a ceiling fan light.

Is the a vase with fake flowers in the center of the table?

No.

..or is is there something else at the center of the table, and if so, what?

On the bar area countertop I have Merry Mushrooms ceramic salt & pepper shakers with a toothpick holder, retro tin Coca-Cola straw canister with multi-colored plastic straws in it, and the napkin holder on a rust-colored charger mat, and then I also have a candle in this glass candle holder:

What's your favorite food to eat?

Probably steak & potatoes with salad.

What's your favorite dessert?

Pumpkin pie with Cool Whip topping.

What's your favorite drink?

PSL. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Have you ever scrapbooked at your kitchen table?

No.

When was the last time you cooked dinner for someone?

Today.

When was the last time someone cooked dinner for you?

Sat. Dec. 23, for my mom’s Christmas party.

🏡 Study/Den/Office 🏡

Do you have a separate room for an "office" in your home?

No.

Do you own a desk?

The girls both have their own vanity desks.

If so, do you do work at your desk?

Do you own a desktop computer or a laptop computer? 🖥 💻

Greg has a laptop.

What type of computer do you own (Dell, Mac, etc.)?

MacBook.

Do you own a desk chair, and if so, what type of chair is it, and what does it look like? Is it a spinny desk chair?

The girls have the same shiny black industrial dining chair for the desks.

What is your favorite book that you own?

😳 I refuse to choose!

...and what is your favorite book in general?

Do you make to-do lists? 📝

Sure do.

Have you crossed any items off your to-do list today? ✅

Yep.

Do you own a lot of paper? 📄

I suppose so.

Do you own a printer? 🖨

Yes.

Do you own a fax machine? 📠

No.

Do you own a stapler?

Yes.

How many bulletin boards do you own? 📌

None.

Do you own a ruler? 📏

Not unless any of the kids do; we just have measuring tapes.

Do you own a calculator?

The girls do.

Do you own a pair of scissors? ✂️

Several.

Do you more frequently write with pencils or pens? ✏️ 🖊

Pens, always.

Do you use a planner?

Yep.

Are you counting down the days to something, and if so, what? 📆

Nah, just enjoying every day.

How many trash cans are there in your home? 🗑

Oh, man…lemme count. Inside, twelve.

...and what colors are they?

Two cream ones in the kitchen garbage drawer, white, greige, black, clear, black mesh metal, blue Minecraft, gray crochet, two frosted clear, and stainless steel.

Do you own a whiteboard?

No.

Do you own a filing cabinet? 🗄

Yes.

Do you own a clipboard? 📋

Greg does.

When was the last time you used a clipboard?

No clue.

If you own a bulletin board, what are three things you have pinned on it? 📌

N/A

Do you own a desk lamp?

No, but my daughter does.

...and if yes, what color is it?

Mint.

🏡 Hallway 🏡

Do you ever just randomly sit in the hallway?

Nah.

Is there a bookshelf in the hallway?

No, but there is a funky whimsical blue wavy metal bookcase for decor on the mid-landing on the staircase. The shelves are too small for books though.

Is there a fuse box in the hallway?

No.

...and if yes, do you have magnets on it?

We don’t have magnets on our breaker box, no.

What are three things that you have in the hallway?

We have our blue recycling bins in the hall off the kitchen.

Is there a smoke detector in the hallway?

Our halls are super small, I’d hardly even call them hallways, but no. They’re in each bedroom and the loft.

Is there an overhead light in the hallway?

Just off of the kitchen and off of the living room between the laundry room & our room.

Is your hallway carpeted, or does it have a wood floor?

Laminate wood.

🏡 Attic 🏡

Does your home have an attic?

Yes.

...and if so, have you ever been up there?

I won’t walk in it, no.

Have you ever wondered if your house was haunted? 👻

Nah.

...and were you ever afraid that it was as a kid?

Two houses were absolutely occupied as a kid.

Have you ever seen a bat flying through your home? 🦇

Not this one, at least!

Have you ever found a mouse in your house? 🐁

Have you ever heard a critter scurrying about in the attic?

Do you own a flashlight? 🔦

Yes.

...and if yes, when was the last time you used it?

Recently, looking for stuff in our deep coat closet that I use for some seasonal storage.

Do you store things in the attic?

Nope.

Are there any windows in the attic? 🪟

No.

Are there cobwebs in your attic?

🤷‍♀️

Are you afraid of attics?

Nope.

🏡 Basement 🏡

Does your home have a basement?

Yes.

...and if yes, when was the last time you went down there?

Two days ago to check on my husband who was down there for a long time but being oddly quiet. 😅

Have you ever had to go to the basement when the air-raid siren went off, because there was a tornado warning? 🌪

Not here, at least.

Do you store anything in the basement?

Yes.

Are you afraid of basements?

No.

Is your basement nice, or is it unfinished and creepy?

It’s unfinished but still nice.

Have you ever lived in the basement?

No, but our bedroom at our previous home was down there. It was a daylight/walk-out family room.

What's the highest floor that you've lived on?

I had a “little apartment” on the finished third floor of my dad’s house when I was younger…

Do basements creep you out?

Not necessarily.

When was the last time you went to the basement?

Two days ago!

🏡 Nursery 🏡

Do you have a nursery in your home?

No, our youngest is 7½! But we have a blended family of four kids and they all have their own bedrooms.

Do you know what color your nursery was when you were a baby?

Yes, white with pink floral foiled wallpaper.

If you have a nursery in your home, what color is it, and what does it look like?

Daughters’ rooms are deeper green, son’s room is a more muted sage-like green, and step-son’s is pale gray.

Do you have a lot of toys in the nursery?

Just our youngest’s room.

What is the theme of the nursery, if there is one?

My step-son is the only one with a specific theme — gaming.

🏡 Other 🏡

Are there any other rooms in your home, and if so, what do you call them?

Just a laundry room and a loft.

How many bedrooms does your home have?

Five.

Is your home old or new?

15 years old — 2008, but main addition was built in 2011, so 12 years old.

Do you own any musical instruments?

I have a keyboard and a guitar, and my daughter has a guitar.

Do you have a closet in your home that you store things in?

Four of the bedrooms have two closets, the last only has one, then four other closets throughout.

Where do you store holiday decorations?

Basement and coat closet.

How many windows are in your home? 🪟

28 (+ 2 basement egress) & all 5 doors are window doors.

If you live in an apartment, condo, or dorm, which story do you live on?

N/A

Do you have a balcony?

No, but two decks.

Does your home have a porch?

It’s a deck porch.

Do you have a big yard?

Yes.

Do you own a swimming pool?

No.

Is there a trampoline in the yard?

My husband literally just assembled it yesterday!

Is there a treehouse in the yard?

No.

Which room of the house is your favorite?

Living room or kitchen.

Which room of the house do you spend the most time in?

Outside. Otherwise, living room or kitchen.

Do you own a mini handheld radio? 📻

We do have quite a few Bluetooth speakers, including retro radio ones.

What is the oldest thing that you own?

That’s tough. I’m not sure!

What are three things you own that are made of wood?

A lot of the furniture! Dressers, TV stand, display shelf in the dining area, end tables, beds, etc. I love wood — warm & natural.

🏡 Final Questions! 🏡

Do your windows have curtains or blinds on them?

Only in the two bathrooms that both have a window and my step-son’s room since he’s apparently all of a sudden afraid of “skin walkers”. 🙄 He’s 10, by the way.

Do you have a good view of the moon from your window? 🪟

No. 😢 I gotta go outside.

Are you happy with where you live right now?

Yessss.

Is your home cluttered, or are you good at keeping it tidy?

The latter.

Do you enjoy cleaning?

I do.

Do you enjoy organizing?

I do.

Are you allergic to dust mites? 🤧

Aren’t we all?

Do you sleep better with music on or off?

Off.

Does listening to music help you study, or does it distract you?

Distracts me.

How many box fans do you own?

One actual box fan for my step-son. One of the kids has an oscillating table fan, one has a stationary table fan, we have an oscillating floor stand fan in our bedroom along with a ceiling fan light, there’s a double window fan when needed, and we have three industrial metal floor fans when needed, like for the child without a fan.

When was the last time you vacuumed?

Today. I vacuum daily.

Do you like to sit on the floor?

When I play Solitaire almost every night on the living room floor. Yes, with real cards. 😆

Which room of the house are you sitting in right now?

Bedroom!

🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡

I hope you have a homey day!

🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡🏡

#survey #surveys

1 note · View note

tubatoad · 1 year

Text

I posted 143 times in 2022

That's 143 more posts than 2021!

46 posts created (32%)

97 posts reblogged (68%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sunnythebunny2

@cashthecomposer

@dying-weeds

@beyoncescock

@thirtysixfrogsinatrenchcoat

I tagged 71 of my posts in 2022

Only 50% of my posts had no tags

#musicals - 10 posts

#love - 8 posts

#kotlc - 7 posts

#newsies - 6 posts

#shitpost - 6 posts

#lol - 5 posts

#music - 5 posts

#tumblr - 4 posts

#livesies - 4 posts

#legally blonde the musical - 4 posts

Longest Tag: 71 characters

#i hope no one’s done this before and i actually had an original thought

My Top Posts in 2022:

Newsies live if you look closely

During the fight between the police and the newsies Jack shoves Les in the trash can and tells him to stay down but he pops up like a frigging whack a mole

14 notes - Posted October 4, 2022

my english teacher thinks i just have a good vocabulary but really i’m just a fansie with a problem

15 notes - Posted October 20, 2022

Jupiter: Welcome to Applebees! Would you like the apples or the bees?

Morrigan: Bees?

Jupiter: She has chosen the BEEEEESSSSS!!!!!

*Jupiter, Hawthorne, Jack, and a reluctant Cadence appear, and release thousands of dog sized bees into the air*

19 notes - Posted November 12, 2022

“Peggy!”

“So’s the Bronx!”

“And I’m Javert!”

same vibes

110 notes - Posted September 30, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

✨that note✨ in musicals

please add your own!

Beetlejuice:mama i’m going HOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMEEEEEE

Mamma Mia: The winner takes it ALLLL

Legally Blonde: i pretend like i’m in IREEELLLLLAAAANNNNNDDDDD

Newsies: the poor guys head is SSSSPPPPPIIIIINNNNNIIIIINNNNGGGGG

little shop of horrors: I got garden style, major moves. I got the stuff and I think that proves. You better move it out, nature calls. You got the point, i’m gonna bust your ballls

Hamilton: and when my time is up, have i done enough?

In the heights: It won’t be long noooooowwwwwwww

Into the woods: It’s the laaasssst MIDNIGHT

Dear Evan Hansen: But every sun doesn’t rise, and no one tells you where you went wrong

Hairspray: Maybelles segment in you can’t stop the beat

Wicked: FIYYYYYEEEEERRRRROOOOOO

West Side Story: AND SUDDENLY I FOUND HOW WONDERFUL A SOUND CAN BE MARRRRIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAA

Tick Tick Boom: Sounds like we’re in for a twister, I DONT SEE A RAINBOW DO YOU

Les Mis:RED THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN

Hadestown: ALLL IVE EVER KNOWN IS HOW TO HOLD MY OWN BUT NOW i wanna hold you too

Bandstand: CREAM RIIIIISSSSSEEEEESSSS

Anastasia:Once upon a DECEMBEERRRRRRR

230 notes - Posted November 22, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

1 note · View note

punchyfeeley · 2 years

Text

Monday and Friday tag game :)

Tagged by @saintgarbanzo ! It isnt monday or friday but here's the thing...time isn't real...

relationship status I'm pretty sure I'm aro bc any time someone wants to date me I feel physically ill but living vicariously through fictional characters' romantic lives and also a mostly hypothetical slut these days as i'm chronically ill and am not risking covid thanks

favorite food my formula? (I have a feeding tube) it lets me not die which is pretty rad. I drink like 6 cups of tea a day tho if I can pick a drink instead- Irish Breakfast with a bit of cream and sugar or iced tea.

favorite color green :)

song stuck in your head Moments Silence (Common Tongue) by Hozier v underrated. I'm a sucker for songs about religion and sex. I'm learning it on guitar so I've been listening to it over and over

last thing you googled "Rabbi Yohanan time period"

time time is made up and I don't wanna think about it

dream trip a cabin in the woods just like alone with my dog and some good reading. Fortunately, this is an achievable goal.

last book you read does a play count? "Titus Andronicus" if yes. The Queer God by Marcella Althaus-Reid if no.

last book you enjoyed Both The Queer God and Indecent Theology by Marcella Althaus-Reid. I'm a slut for Queer Theology.

last book you hated reading I'm not really a Titus Andronicus fan, but if we're talking hate then The Invisible Weevil by Mary Karooro Okurut. It's about the HIV Crisis in Uganda but it's just disgustingly and horrifically classist and victim-blaming and I wrote a 7 page paper about why it sucks

favorite thing to cook/bake biscuits! Sometimes I think I'm not that southern but then I remember I used to work at a biscuit place making biscuits and sausage gravy and shit all day. Also, I call mosquitos "skeeters" and called summer "iced tea season" the other day. so.

favorite craft to do I don't really craft? But I will fix anything. Give me a little hands-on helpful task and I'm happy as a clam. I would rather be invited over to hang a shelf than to watch a movie.

most niche dislikes the sensation of earbuds or headphones (they make the insides of my ears sweaty): when people call all nonpenetrative sex (especially PiV) foreplay.

opinion on circuses A bunch of my friends are circus people! I used to do acro. good group cuddle piles. 12/10.

Do you have a sense of direction and if not what’s the worst way you’ve gotten lost? no! My mom and I once got lost in rural Georgia and there was this very muscular attractive man wood chopping wood outside in the rain??? who gave us directions and I was sure we were going to be murdered.

last song you listened to Symphony For Strings by Dvorak. I don't have a story I just love it.

last show you watched The Musketeers. It's really bad but everyone is hot. Sexy sword fighting. I really love terrible shows that know they're terrible. You also have to try not to think about how they're all just old-timey cops.

currently watching nothing. I can't focus on watching things anymore for whatever reason. I can read for 18 hours a day but cannot focus on watching something for longer than 5 minutes.

currently reading The fall semester is starting so I'm currently reading Global Migration: Patterns, Processes, and Politics for my Migration and Displacement Class. I'm trying to only take one depressing class per semester now and this was my pick. It's genuinely very interesting but also owchie my heart

current obsessions Queer Talmud. Jewish Bondage. Homoerotic Chavruta relationships.

Tagging @aliziafinola @bendingsignpost @northeasternwind @cosmicmechanism @feltelures @punktuation

1 note · View note

king-star · 3 years

Text

When the Party’s Over

Warning: Homophobia, transphobia, death, bile, guts, broken limb, crying, pet neglection, driving while slightly tipsy, fire (lmk if i need to add more. This is all around pretty dark and sad, proceed with caution)

Match: Yelena Belova x enby!Reader; Wanda Maximoff x reader

Genre: Angst, Angst, and more Angst

A/N: This is the first chapter in a series. Idk how long it’ll be. the plan is bi weekly updates. im reallyyyyy proud of this one so let’s hope it doesn’t flop. ENJOY!

Word Count: ~3,000

Summary: You have a horrible nightmare, leaving you with anxiety for Yelena. Yelena assures you that everything is fine and leaves on a mission.

Your tongue rubs the roof of your mouth in an attempt to rid itself of the sickly sweet drink you’d been sipping. A hundred intoxicated humans swirl around you. Fabric, skin, and feathers blend together, the orchestra the only thing holding off the headache behind your eyes.

You didn’t want to be here. Sure ballroom charity balls could be fun. If you had your best friends there, you could chat only with them, and dance to your heart's content. Unfortunately for you, everyone you could stand to be around was busy. Leaving you human-shieldless from your mothers many socialite friends.

The “oh my goodness Y/N I haven’t seen you since you were in highschool. How are you?” got old quick. Retelling your life story over and over was a pain especially with your mother gripping your hand making sure you didn’t slip up. Share any information that didn’t quite fit the Y/L/N dynasty image. Mostly she didn’t want you sharing about the love of your life, your girlfriend, your Yelena.

When the two of you first got together you waited nearly 5 months before telling your mother. The first time you dated a girl she had hated it. She tried to act like she was supportive, claiming “I will always love you no matter what.” But in the end she always shielded this fact from the public eye. She was supportive of all the LGBT+ movements from a political standpoint. Never her own child.

You never told Yelena about this. You claimed the reason you didn’t want to share her with your mother was because you wanted your relationship to not have paparazzi after you two. She bought it for a while but you could only keep the love of your life away from the woman who gave you life for so long. It didn’t take a master spy to understand the emotions behind the look your mother gave you when you brought Yelena to dinner. Yelena never brought it up but it was an unspoken understanding. Your mother didn’t accept you no matter how hard she tried to fake it.

Now you just wanted the event to be over so you could go home to Yelena. You flipped your wrist, checking the ridiculously expensive watch you had on.

11:31

She was definitely asleep by now. Yelena never stayed up past 10:30. Frowning, you set down your glass and turned to your mother, waiting for her conversation to end. When she finally stopped speaking she turned to you and cocked an eyebrow,

“Y/N. Are you leaving? so soon?” she pouted but enough years in her home taught you her looks. This was faked sadness.

“Unfortunately yes mother. Lena is probably asleep by now and I have work early. She probably forgot to feed our dog,” you enunciated the words that might clue in your mothers friend on how you and this woman were related. A last “fuck you mother” before you left. She smiled warningly and nodded.

“Well… you must get home to your friend. I will see you soon daughter,” she kissed your hand and you stood there frozen. Of course, she would invalidate your gender and your relationship in one comment. Your nostrils flared and you turned quickly, letting your hand smack your unfinished drink into her lap and treading off quickly.

“Fuck you mother. How someone could be so hateful to their own child I will never understand,” you muttered to yourself. You handed your ticket to the valet and stood with your arms crossed, waiting. You made sure to tip the valet an absurd amount, and drove off quickly. The only thing that would keep you from doing something stupid in retaliation was Yelena’s arms around you.

Nearly thirty minutes later you pulled the car into the garage. It shouldn’t have taken you that long to get home but you couldn’t help but drive with the top down for a bit. Anger and maybe a bit of fear had bubbles underneath your skin and you didn’t want to bother Yelena. You stepped out of the car and held your head in your hands. You hadn’t drank that much, but a headache would be inevitable.

Fanny met you at the door. She was obviously excited, tail wagging as she raced back to her food bowl

“ok ok girl. I’ve got you,” you rubbed her head and dumped a scoop of food into her bowl. Loosening your tie you dragged yourself to the bedroom. You smiled as the light poured in and illuminated the silhouette of a sleeping Yelena.

“Deep asleep. I’ll join you in a second,” you pulled the rest of your suit off. Picking up a discarded shirt you put it on, and leaned your head against the mirror.

“That was misery. And mother’s comment. I shouldn’t care about what that bitch thinks or says. But I can't help it,” you let out a sigh and picked up your toothbrush. Maybe someday she will accept you. But at that point would she ever be able to make up for how she treated you?

Ready for bed you slid in beside Yelena, careful not to wake her. Fanny, finished with her food, jumped into bed with you and snuggled up with a lick to your face. You smiled and kissed her head then kissed Yelena.

“night my love. See you in the morning,” your heavy lids drooped and you relaxed, setting a hand on Yelena and falling into dreamland.

Your thighs hurt. Fire and smoke burn your throat and eyes. You search for something. What exactly you aren’t sure. Tears stream down your face as anxiety floods your chest. If you don’t find the thing soon your world will be crushed.

A broken door, barely on its hinges, is at your right and you know that’s it. A hard turn and you smack your arm into the frame. You grasp at your wrist as more tears prick your eyes.

“Fuck!” A familiar level of pain flares and you know it’s broken. Your eyes dart around the room, still looking for that unknown thing. A pile of smoking wood sits in front of you and your feet carry you to it. This was it.

You try hard to pull through the heavy, hot wood with your one arm. A cry comes from below, an anxiety flaring familiar cry. You pull harder and uncover and dirty and bloody Yelena.

“LENA!” you shout and help her out. Her hands held her stomach. She smiles sickly and then curls in pain.

“Y/N. You found me. I hoped you would. Quick kiss me. I don’t have long,” Your eyes widen and you move her hands. The sight of her stomach makes you sick. Turning to the side you retch and vile spills from your mouth. You wipe your mouth and shake your head, tears fall hard now.

“Lena no no. You’re fine. We can fix you. Please,” you slide your arm under her and try to pick her up but she screams and goes limp in your arms.

“FUCK Y/N! stop. There's no hope. Please just kiss me. I don’t want to die without that.” you shake your head more and set her down. You refused to accept her death.

“No Yelena you are not going to die here. You can’t die. You are too well trained. a-and… I can't live without you. it’ll be fine,” She tries to raise her head but then it falls and she spasms. Your eyes widen and you do your best to hold her still but your broken wrist shoots in pain.

“No no no NO!” you kiss her over and over. Fear pulses through you and when she relaxes completely you sob. Your head aches from the pressure of your sobs and your broken wrist protests. Maybe hours pass and you sit there with her dead body pressed to your chest, her blood and guts smearing all over you.

Then guilt overtakes the sadness. She asked you for one thing. One single kiss before she died and you didn’t fulfill that. You couldn’t give her everything she deserved in life or even in her final moments.

You wake up shaking and screaming. Yelena is awake next to you, crying and shaking your shoulder violently.

“Please Y/N,” she sobs, snot and tears mix and fall forgotten. You sit up barely able to hold yourself up. She is alive.

“Fuck Yelena what’s wrong?” Your dream haunts you. You search her stomach and her whole body for major wounds. She is obviously unsure what you are doing and grabs your face forcing you to look at her.

“Y-you were shaking and screaming and crying and I didn’t know what was wrong. If you were having a seizure or what.” You shake your head and take deep breaths.

“No, I'm good. Not seizure. R-Really…” your words falter and you stare off, caught up in the memory of the dream. Yelena snaps in front of you and hugs your arm. “Ah sorry. Bad dream. really, really bad dream.” you stare at her head unsure if this was the dream or if Yelena really was alive.

“D-do you want to tell me about it?” Her arms slide under yours and she holds you from the side. You shake your head and lay it on her shoulder. “Ok but if you do tell me. I’ll hold you until you fall asleep again.”

The thought of being asleep again makes you tense up. Yelena feels it and rubs your side softly. She kisses you in every way she knows you like and pets your head.

“I’m not going to sleep. I can’t live through that again. It made me think I was going to be alone. Please don’t leave me Lena. please. I don’t wanna die alone.” She frowns and hugs you tight.

“I’m never going to leave you. I’m here baby. I’m here.” She kisses your jaw softly and you nod. Relaxing again, you wrap your arms around her waist and kiss her shoulders.

“Y-you died. There was a fire and I broke my wrist and it was smokey and you got impaled and you died. You asked me to kiss you and I couldn’t accept the fact you were dying so I didn’t kiss you. I couldn’t give you what you deserve.” She frowns and kisses you.

“No Y/N. Don’t you dare. It was just a nightmare, that’s all. I’m NEVER leaving you. ok?” She holds your face and kisses you softly. The kiss lasts a while and you melt into your touch. Fears still paralyse you every couple hours but she holds you until the sun comes up. She knows exactly what you love and how to make you feel safe. She really wasn’t ever going to leave.

Weeks pass. You are sure you have gotten past the nightmare. You go to work everyday and Yelena stays home going through paperwork. When you come home the two of you snuggle and bliss fills you. Your mother doesn’t ask you to come to any more charity events and you think maybe, just maybe things are good.

Then Yelena gets called on the mission. When she tells you she will be gone for a week your mind reels. You can barely see straight as the dream vividly flashes through your brain. Yelena gets worried, grabbing your hand and you back away searching her body for any sign of blood.

“No. Lena please. What if you get hurt? I-I can’t. You promised you’d never leave.” Her eyes look at you apologetically.

“Don’t worry. I’m a professional. It’s just a small info gathering job. Absolutely no danger,” she smiles at you and sets a hand on your shoulder. You back away from her hand and lean your head back to force the tears back.

“Yelena… ok. Please. Don’t get hurt,” She nods and kisses your cheek grabbing her bag.

You spend the entire week at home. Anxiety grips you so hard that you can’t stand to go to work. A fever strikes and you throw up every evening at almost exactly 10:30. Work tells you to stay at home and probably go to the doctor. Honestly you’d rather go to work so you have less time to think about her.

Most of Yelena's missions don’t allow for her to contact you and the stress of it all has your brain thinking of her the entire time she’s gone. By the time Yelena is on her way back you have dropped 12 pounds. You hadn’t eaten, only bothering to get up to feed Fanny. A cold sweat coats your skin and you hold your arms to you. Blankets were too hot, but it was too cold without them.

The alarm on your phone signalling it’s time to feed Fanny goes off. You throw the blankets off and wipe dried tears. The tv screen flashes a “keep watching screen.” You aren’t really sure when it came up but your mind hadn’t registered the tv in a couple days.

When the door clicks unlocked you scream. Silence had filled the apartment for so long and the sound was louder than anything you’d ever heard. Fanny starts barking, running to the door, then coming back and sitting at your feet.

You fall to the ground clasping the food scoop. Fanny licks your face as tears fall. Every fear that had plagued you came to the forefront of your mind. What if it wasn’t Yelena? What if it was Hill telling you to come in? No, they would call you for that. But if Yelena was dead…

Arms wrap around and pick you up, setting you on the couch. You whip your head back and forth trying to catch a glance of who it is. In the back of your mind you know it's her, but for some reason you’d been convinced over the past week that she’s dead.

A warm towel wipes away dried tears and snot, and a soft hand holds yours. Tears blur your vision but you steady your breaths. The anxiety in your chest dissipates. You lean your head back forcing the tears in and look back to catch a look at the woman you love. But, instead of long blonde hair and soft round face, you see long red hair, falling in waves.

“Lena? Did you have to dye your hair for the mission?” She frowns and shakes her head, setting down the towel.

“Fuck Y/N. I know you can’t remember but I hate having to keep telling you this,” The voice is not Yelena’s. It’s your friends. Wanda’s. Your eyes look her all over and you tense up confused.

“Tell me what Wanda? What’s wrong with Lena?” She grabs both your hands and looks at you with the softest expression she can muster.

“The fire Y/N. Do you remember? The fire where Lena…. She bled out,” The anxiety of the dream. No memory. The smoke, your raw throat, and the hours of sobbing.

You shake your head and quick breaths fill your lungs. Wanda tries to get you to calm down. Your vision spots while your brain searches for oxygen your hyperventilating can’t provide.

“Y/N please calm down. Please. FUCK! I promised to never use it without permission but between the two of you…” Red magic flows from her hands and wraps around your head. Your breathing slows down and your vision comes back. Wanda cradles your head and hums.

You reach up and see the tear streaks on her face. Her eyes look bloodshot and dark circles are prominent under her eyes. You pout and try to hug her back. All the fears that had consumed you for weeks were now gone. Even if it was only by Wanda’s magic. You curled into her side and fell asleep. Finally able to find some peace.

It was the night of the charity gala. You drove home but had taken the long way around to cool off from your mothers subtle aggression. Plans on how to ignore her future advances build in your mind as you pull into the parking garage. You stepped out of the car and held your head in your hands. You hadn’t drank that much, but a headache would be inevitable.

Sirens sound from the road in front of your complex and you growl. The loud noise and lights make your head pound. You shake your keys and walk towards the stairwell. Coughing into your arm and you open the door to your floor. You throw your hand back with a scream at the hot door handle.

“the fuck…? NO!” forgetting your pain you throw open the door and run into the building. Smoke flows from under doors and fire licks at the walls. The sound of the siren gets louder from some open window. You run through the halls trying your best to not breathe in smoke. Yelena would be asleep. She wouldn’t know what’s happening.

Your apartment door is on the right and you stand back and kick the handle. Your foot hurts as it contacts the rough wooden door but it cracks. You kick again and the door falls in. Running through the door you smack your arm into the frame and cry out in pain.

Fanny barks from one of the rooms and you follow the noise letting her run free into the hallway. You hope dearly that the dog finds her way out.

The entirety of your home is consumed in flames. Beams that held up the apartment above you are on the floor. The poor old couple who was always so nice. Hopefully they had gotten out before it collapsed. Running to your bedroom you try to open the door. It gives quickly but before you can get to Yelena a strong arm grabs at your back.

“What the? HEY!” you squirm trying to slip out of the grip. You have no luck and result to punching. Nothing makes the arms let you go as they pull you from the building. Along the way down you consider it may be a firefighter saving your life.

“Please. My girlfriend, she’s still in there. Please, she was asleep. Save her. I can get out,” you plead with your “saviour”. The person doesn’t acknowledge any words or attempts of movement. They just carry you out of the building back into the parking garage. At some point you began crying, fearing for your girlfriends and your neighbours lives.

You are carried to a car and roughly thrown in. Your broken wrist, now remembered, aches and you curl into a ball. The driver doesn’t speak to you and the person who carried you doesn’t get into the car with you. You didn’t register the person in the back seat with you until they cough. Or rather She coughs.

“Oh Y/N I’m glad we got you out ok. I was so scared we wouldn’t be able to get you out before the fire got you too,” Your eyes widen at the familiar voice and you sit up looking into her eyes. The pieces fall into place in your mind. No you’d never thought she’d be this cruel. Yet here you were, Yelena and Fanny. They were in there.

“You didn’t. no no you didn’t. You are cruel and hateful but not murderous,” you pull away as a hand strokes your cheek. Hate flashes behind your eyes.

“Oh honey. You will forgive me when you realise it was for the sake of the family. Like they always say; ‘Mother knows best.’”

(So it has been decided this is going to be a series. Follow and shoot me an ask if you wanted to be added to the tag list for updates)

DO NOT repost my work. Reblogs and Likes are appreciated. If you enjoy my work leave a comment!

#yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x y/n #yelena belova fanfic #yelena belova #yelena belova angst #marvel fanfic #mcu #yelena belova x you #avengers x reader #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x y/n #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff angst #wanda maximoff fanfic #wanda maximoff

107 notes · View notes

ygreczed-3 · 4 years

Photo

The Red Guard and the Snow Angel

Summer Falls desert concept art

Hank and Connor

Gavin and Nines meditating + thunder, snow, fire and wind seal

Gavin and the thunder spirit

More concept arts - traditional art & inking

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

When they go through the Summer Falls desert, Connor and Nines pass out fairly soon due to their intolerance to fire magic. They only get better at night, when the temperature drops, so they stay awake to watch out while the humans sleep. During the day Hank and Gavin have to take them on their horse/Sumo and walk beside them, even though the intense heat isn't making things easy for them either. They reach a village in an oasis where Connor and Nines get better, and when they realize there's a spring in it, they decide to go and rest a bit as the night arrives.

Nines and Gavin are gone meditating on a less crowded part of the spring.

Gavin : That's stupid… How can this make me stronger than my training ? Nines : Stop talking and focus on your breathing. Gavin : Grmphh.. Nines : Can you feel the source of magic inside your body ? Gavin : … Yeah. Nines : You have to… establish a connection with it. Show him you don't fear it Gavin : But I fear it. Nines : The war spirit you host is an incredible source of power, and you can believe me, it is as bellicose as you are. It only needs a goal to aim for and you'll be able to channel its energy. Gavin : … You know I'm your enemy… Why do you help me ? Nines, closed eyes : I know I can compete with you. I'm ready to be challenged. And it's funnier to fight a skilled warrior than a scared little boy. Gavin : … Fucker.

Connor and Hank in the hot spring

Connor : I think that's what your hug feels like. Hank : hm ? Connor : The hot water. I think it's what hugs feel like. Hank : You said my hugs... Connor : Did I ? I was just thinking… about how you hug Sumo sometimes. He loves it. Hank : Yeah, this big boy loves cuddles I admit that. Connor : It must feel good. Hank : What… You've never been hugged before ? Connor : Golems do have… intimate behaviors, of course but it's not… I mean we're… not physically warm, so... (NB : I was thinking golems in this universe would be like vampires, not as freezing as actual snow but still colder than humans) Hank : ...Thought you didn't like heat that much. Connor : Warmth from human's touch is different from fire magic : it feels more… safe, less aggressive. I think I'd like that. Hank : … How do you know that ? Connor : I touched your back to heal it, remember ? Your warmth feels nice. Hank : Yeah okay, you touched me, but you don't know what my hugs feel like ? Maybe you'd hate that. Connor : I wish I could know.

They look at each other, but then Hank looks away and stands up.

Hank : It's late, I'm tired. I'm going back to the inn. Connor seems disappointed, but then Hank keeps going. Hank : You coming ?

When they enter the room they share all together, Nines is already in stasis and Gavin is snoring loudly.

Hank takes Connor's wrist silently, looking at him in the eyes as if tacitly asking for permission. Connor just lets himself be enveloped by wide arms, and rests his cheek on his collar bone.

Connor sighs, closing his eyes as he enjoys that nice bear hug. He feels that warm something in his chest growing in his body, invading his stomach with pleasing flutters.

Connor : Hank… Hank : Shhh… it would be embarrassing to wake those two idiots up now.

Connor bites his lower lip as he silently reaches for Hank's hand, his skin turning white as he presses gently each of his fingers against Hank's. It's known to be a quite intimate gesture among golems, and the closest human equivalence to it would be a kiss. Connor is aware that it could even be interpreted as indecent given how close their bodies are, and that if Nines was to wake up at that moment he would probably choke on thin air. Of course Hank has no clue about that and just thinks it's funny.

Hank : What, you wanna dance ?

Connor realizes they're holding each other on the left side and touching hands on the right side, and it seems like they're going to waltz. He chuckles from the absurdity of the situation from a human's perspective.

Connor : I wouldn't know how to. Hank : Good thing, I'm a terrible dancer. Connor : Ahah...hmm, Hank, I like it. Can we stay like this for a moment ? Hank : Sure.

One night in the middle of the desert, Gavin is on the watch as Hank sleeps in the tent. Connor is with him, but Nines inexplicably stays around the fire, silent. Gavin is bored out so he just starts the conversation.

Gavin : I feel like the old man and your stupid brother are getting along. Nines : I have this feeling too. Gavin : Doesn't bother you? Nines : What can I do ? I asked Connor to be careful, but I'm not blind… He's shining with glee whenever Hank is around him. I can't… force him not to feel. Also, I think Hank isn't that bad of a person… for a human. Gavin : Still certain we're the bad guys ? Think about it : you were made to serve us. You betrayed your creators and let us starve like dogs. Nines : Humans didn't create us. Kamski did, and if he had wanted to, he could have made unthinking, obedient golems. Maybe we were meant to break free. Gavin : Oh yeah, so why can't you even procreate ? Simple answer: you were not designed to be an individual species from the start. You were built with no other purpose in life than to help us survive. Nines : Didn't that even occur to you that humans did bad things too ? Gavin : We're just trying to survive ! Nines : So we are. Gavin : … So what ? You're saying we're two evils ? Of course we are. But I have to protect my people, you understand that ?

Nines stays silent, exploring the surprisingly genuine glare Gavin throws at him. Of course he understands that. His own despise for humanity is only driven by his deep desire to protect Connor, Marcus, and his people. He looks back at the fire heating them, unconsciously processing how ridiculously similar they are.

And yet, something starts growing in his mind, the irritating sensation his relationship with Gavin has changed from the moment they met, and that he unexpectedly wanted to protect him as well.

Nines : Would you kill me ?

He can't even explain how this sentence even made it out of his throat. He already knows the answer. Gavin stares at him longingly, noticeably surprised by the question. He stays silent as he puts more wood in the fire.

Gavin : If I had to, I probably would. But I… hum… don't want to. Nines : … hm. Gavin : What about you ? Would you kill me ? Nines : I don't know. If lives were at stake, certainly, even if I'd find this decision… regrettable. Gavin : ... Oh wow, is that your way to tell me you like me ? Nines : … Don't set your hopes too high.

Gavin breathes in a laugh and goes back to silence, smiling smugly.

They arrive in Nestlepeek and split in two teams, Hank and Connor go to the center of the town, where Connor hopes to find more precise information about Kamski and where he hides.

Gavin and Nines were supposed to go buy supplies, but as they head to the covered market, they are challenged by a man in the street to defeat his champion in a fight. As Nines realizes it's all for illegal gambling, Gavin accepts and finds himself in a cage, combating a birdman.

He thinks he's got the hang of it but as soon as the birdman starts flying Gavin can't touch him with his sword anymore and becomes vulnerable to his aerial attacks.

Nines : Gavin ! Summon the spirit ! Gavin : No way ! Nines : You'll lose if you don't ! Gavin : I know what I'm doing, alright !? Nines : You obviously don't ! Thunder magic gives you advantageous long throw attacks, you can't win against a flying foe with close combat techniques ! Gavin : I think I killed enough Golems to know how to fight flying foes ! Nines : You bastard…

Nines uses his snow magic to catch the champion in ice and immobilize him.

Owner : What the hell !!! Who did that ?! Nines : I did. I'll replace your champion, open the cage.

The owner is confused first but then he sees the opportunity and accepts. Nines enters the cage and gets ready to fight.

Gavin : … You wanna die ? Told you I could do it. Nines : We've been talking about this fight for ages. It's time to see what you're capable of.

They start fighting and they're pretty even for the first ten minutes. Their fight gathered a lot of gamblers and spectators.

When Nines starts to take advantage, Gavin's eyes suddenly turn bright yellow, and he charges at him : Nines can see the thunder magic halo surrounding him. He parries many strikes but Gavin has gained in speed and ferocity. Soon enough, Gavin throws him to one extremity of the cage, and as the crowd around them is screaming in excitement, Gavin holds up his dagger. He's trembling, electricity forming around his hand.

Nines can make eye contact but somehow, Gavin isn't answering his glare.

Nines : Gavin- You hear me ?

Gavin doesn't say anything, and Nines is sure he's gonna die when the human warrior shoots down his dagger… only to hit one of the cage's bars just behind him. Gavin closes his eyes, and opens them, showing blue-green orbs again, and he straightens up, breathless.

The crowd boos them as Gavin takes a step back and drops the other dagger. He asks the owner to open the cage and leaves the place, Nines following him, still out of breath as well.

Nines : Gavin !

Gavin stops, letting Nines get closer, until they face each other again.

Nines : You did it. You mastered the spirit… Do you realize that ? Gavin : I could have killed you, then everyone around me. That's what the spirit wanted to do… Do you realize that ? Nines : But you didn't. With a bit more training-... Gavin : I almost killed you, Nines, for fuck's sake ! Nines : … So what ? Thought you were ready to. Gavin : Listen, this beast wanted you dead, everyone dead so bad… How can I… How can I use this power when I know how dangerous and unstable it is? Nines : … But you stopped it, right ? You can control it. Gavin : You fucker, if it wasn't for you, I know I couldn't have stopped it. I would have killed all those strangers, I know that, and I'm not… I'm not a murderer. Nines : … What do you mean, for me ? Gavin : Drop it. I need some air, don't follow me.

Hank and Connor enter the library, Connor is looking for the archived events-records to see if Kamski came into this village (which is most likely given it's the first one you can find after the desert)

It appears that the local people can fly so the library is very high, and most scales don't even reach the top of the bookshelves.

Hank : How the hell can we reach the archives ? Connor : Wait a minute, I'll go there and take some volumes with me.

Connor spreads his wings, that widen to support his weight as he takes off to the highest point of the library. Hank is impressed by how graceful Connor looks in the air. When the golem comes back with a consequential pile of old, handwritten books, he's just there, mouth open in amazement.

Connor : Here we go… the last 10 years of history in this village… Ready to pull an all-nighter ?

Hank doesn't reply.

Connor : Hank ? Hank : You're beautiful.

Connor blinks once, his lips slightly parted from the surprise, his eyes conveying nothing else than confusion and yet, low-key content.

Connor: ..I'm sorry ? Hank : When you fly I mean… that's impressive… and beautiful. Connor : Huh… Thank you, I guess ? Anyway hum… let's… let's find a table… Hank : “Thank you” ? But do you even realize how beautiful you are ? Connor : I was created to meet some human ideal. Why would I be proud of something that isn't my doing ? Hank : Ah, don't be so modest. Connor : … you know, I think I find humans more attractive than Golems. Each one of you is unique, and I love everything you call “flaws”.

Hank laughs halfheartedly at his last line.

Hank : You don't make sense, kid.

They read the archives until it's dark outside. Hank can't help but yawn as Connor lights the candles to keep reading.

Connor : You can go back to the inn, Gavin must be there already, and Nines can take over. Hank : Nah, I'm good. Connor : Hm… Hank : You okay ? You look… worried. Connor sighs : … What if we can't find Kamski ? What if… I was wrong, what if we had to go back to Detroit and Jericho with just nothing ? I don't want to return to a situation where I'll have to fight you… I just can't. Hank : … Yeah, I understand that. I don't think I can remain a Red Guard after what we've been through… After I got to know you. Connor : If we were to fail… nothing will never be the same again. Without you.

Hank just looks at Connor with sharp eyes, as if he's got the urge to say something. At this point Hank knows he's falling for the Golem, but of course, he won't say anything, because he's sure it's only one sided, Connor is so young and handsome he can't possibly feel the same.

Actually the dark haired golem is totally in love with the man, but again, he thinks Hank can't reciprocate his feelings since he's probably into women (after all he used to have a wife), and definitely not into Golems anyways. It just feels so unfair to both of them to consider going back to their normal life when they just want to stay with the other so bad. They just wish they could stay together and run away in some romantic and lovesick lunacy. Again, they won't tell each other about it.

#detroit become human #dbh #The red guard and the snow angel #TRGATSA #dbh hank #dbh connor #dbh gavin #dbh nines #reed900 #hankcon #dbh hankcon #dbh reed900

487 notes · View notes