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dis-astre · 2 years

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hi to the new people in the les mis fandom joining bc of joseph quinn, it is lovely to have u all with us and u are more than welcome, however u should know that bbc enjolras (and the whole bbc adaptation) is nowhere close to the original character and everything he represent.

while joseph quinn did a really good job at acting enjolras, the way the writers wrote his character was bad and out of character. obviously, and it's normal, an adaptation will always have its own interpretation of a character, and that's what's make fiction so great. but i think u need to be aware of the fact that it's not a good representation of what enjolras' character is and what his character has been representing for over 150 years (i could go into details and maybe will but it's late and i'm working early tomorrow).

i also wanted to say, as a reminder that, while it's completely fine to simp for enjolras (no one is immune to him, whether he's played by aaron tveit, joseph quinn or anyone else) and find him hot (because he IS hot or because he's played by joseph quinn, again, i get it; i don't find moustachjolras hot but damn that man is find irl), u need to be aware that enjolras is a queer character. it's stated multiple times that he has no interest in women, never has and never will. his character has been an important representation for the queer community, him being compared to a lot of gay historical figures (and i'm not going to start with the enjoltaire); but also for the aromantic and asexual community and trans community. his character is very likely to be aroace; and victor hugo describe him as being very androgynous looking, looking like a young woman. and while i don't want to talk on behalf of the trans community, i've seen a lot of post and fanfictions headcanoning him as trans, and i think it's very important to have that kind of representation in such an important piece of classical literature.

so please, be aware that the y/n fanfic and nswf y/n fanfic with female character x enjolras can be really disturbing, especially for people who have been in the fandom for a long time and are really looking up to his character and kinning him. don't just reduce him to hot-man-u-wanna-do-the-dirty-with when his character carries so much importance and has for decades. and i promise, caring about a character's whole essence and personality doesn't make them any less interesting or hot (quite the contrary actually).

also, let's not forget how we collectively hated on the casting choice when it first came out and i find it a bit odd to suddenly change our mind just bc it's the same actor who plays eddie munson. i personally think we were right to complain, bc it WAS a bad casting choice considering all the physical description of enjolras we had (and yes, in les mis, his physical appearance matters of lot).

we are not trying to gatekeep our fandom. on the contrary, i think it's really pretty fucking cool to have new people finding an interest in a 160yo book ! and for me, u guys are more than welcome to join our sad silly little fandom. but we just want u to be aware of all of this (and maybe some other issues that do not cross my mind rn) and be educated so we can all be drama free.

ok i'm done now, sorry for the long post, welcome again to the fandom, and if u decide to stay be ready for the tears and the pain caused by mr victor hugo ! bye bye, with love, a little french fan

#les mis #les miserables #enjolras #bbc les mis #bbc!enjolras #the brick #joseph quinn #stranger things #sorry if there are weird phrasing english isnt my native language #(yes im french)#(im standing up for my culture or smtg like that)

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boxwinebaddie · 3 months

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ngl you spoiling your fanfics on here instead of writing them is kind of a cop out :/

first of all,

congrats on being the second hate message i've ever gotten!

secondly?

Fuck You <3 :)

thirdly?

you can call me a looooot of things anon, but do not Ever!!!! EVER!!! call me lazy. you wrote me 27 words just now and i have written over 100k in under a year spanning over two extremely detailed multi chapter fanfictions...like? and that doesn't even include this tumblr which goes back 42 PAGES OF VERY LONG ASK MESSAGES.

most of them being extensively thought out lore and headcannons about two fictional boy best friends on a television show that is so unserious that over half of those hcs had to be crafted around straws and legitmized by hours/days/weeks/months of research by me???

because you guys send me "hi uncle nina, what is kyle's fav color?" and i could just send! it's blue <3 tysm for asking! :) but i Never answer my ask memes like that and again??? there is 42 pages of evidence to support that baby, so good luck fighting that fight! it's never just blue it's always Kyle's Favorite Color Is Blue BECAUSE and then i go on for several paragraphs about why kyle's favorite color is blue, i give you everything that i know about that subject. Everything.

like, i feel like some of the ask memes that i write are so detailed and extensive that they might be longer than one shots people are writing? this one about each boys favorite season was very labor intensive and i put it out in one day...uuuuugh!!! on the subject of one shots and actually writing? i licherally said i am still willing to do one shot requests or post pieces of things i had inspiration for? i just didn't want to promise you actual chapter updates because i didn't want to let you down??? like i specifically wanted to avoid this :(((

i'm actually writing the ask memes because i feel like it is the medium where i have the strongest chance at providing you with well written content, like, i could go back to updating but they would be rushed, poorly written and passionless. i put like...a lot of my heart into these.

and, my love, my hate, lmaooo, i could just not do that.

like, i legitimately have no reason to keep doing this.

i could delete this whole tumblr with 42 pages of content that i am sure people come back and reread because they ask me not to delete stuff and ask me where it went. i could also private both my fics on ao3 or i could delete them entirely...and it would be no sweat off my back, tbh. like i said, because my imposter syndrome is so bad and i was so stressed out writing my fics...i can't read them anymore. i am moderately embarassed by them and IF I HAD TIME...i would rewrite them. i would make them so much better...i wish i could.

because i DONT have time? i work a 7-3 job and i come home and answer these...i am exhausted and i answer these? and i do it because its fun yeah, but i do it because i care? about my work?

but i Specifically care about all of you. :((((

that's why this seriously hurts my fucking feelings and sucks? because the reason my fics stay up and the reason i answer these is because i love you very much and care about you getting the answers that you deserve and it makes me sad i can't write them better for u.

i write these answers because every single day, like, i shit you not, i got at least 8 asks yesterday about various things, you all take the time and share your hearts and minds with me. because i have angels in my ask box who write to me, who take the time to read my stuff and ask me questions about it, like...specifically rm?

which, not to toot my own horn baby, but it's a lot easier to get people to content about the regular ship in a fandom ( which is still not easy ) but i got multiple people invested in an AU FANFICTION with almost no cushion from the fandom, the only help i got/boost for exposure, is that i had clout from writing a different successful fanfic??? which i literally wrote anonymously? it was my first fanfic!!!!

fight me!!!! lol!!!!! show yourself, coward!!!! you charlatan!!!

tell me that you did the same, baby!!!! that's what i THOUGHT!!!

but yeah, i do this because i care about y'all and i care DEEPLY about the things that i write and that they are quality. for example, oh my god just talking about this makes me depressed...when i wrote rm4 WHICH I WROTE UNDER DURESS, EXTREME DURESS, both physical and mental? which...i loved rm4. almost all of those hcs and metaphorical things in there, i was very, very proud of.

anyways, i wrote like 16k and it was taking me Too Long in my fucked up girl brain to do it on my computer and because i was excited to get that chap you'd all been waiting for out to you and because for some reason i felt Obligated to work fast because of the stress of everyone waiting for my work, i, ON MY CELLPHONE, highlighted basically every single word, all 16k of them and meticulously formatted from like 7PM at night until 6AM in the morning the next day. i had THREE monster energies and i considered buying a 5hr energy AND POURING IT INTO A MONSTER ENERGY???? that is how fucked up my mind got trying to put out my fanfics and...

during the last 100 or so words...because i was so tired, i accidentally highlighted my whole chapter, finished formatting, felt super relieved when i clicked the Save button only to realize...

every single italics was gone.

every single one...italics i'd spent hours on...every single one was gone forever. i could not retrieve it. it was lost...all that work. :( and it's kind of embarassing, but i cried for a very long time about that. like i posted this chapter that i cared about and i was...super depressed. not even because i worked hard on formatting it for hours and all through the night ( which i have done for over 12 other chapters )

...but because i realized that you guys would be reading something with no italics. that you would be reading something that was not as good as it could have been. i was sad because you were going to read something that because you are so wonderful, i was sad to send you. i was so upset, actually, about you reading something subpar that i considered...reformatting the entire thing...i....this fucking sucks.

this makes me really sad. this makes me reeeeeally fucking sad lol. like to say i don't care about all of you? to call me lazy? say this is a cop out??? like oh my GODDDD????

i am a REAL person, you guys! i fucking exist outside of this blog? people who write fanfiction do it out of love. it's a labor of love, y'all. i have a real job. i do this for zero dollars and zero cents and i do it every single day like? fanfiction authors do not owe you anything.

but...i love you? lol? that is lame but i legitimately worry abt all of you. like even you weird, mean anon? because i assume even tho you sent hate mail you did it because you love my work? maybe? because you had to be upset enough about this, or enjoy my work enough, to be sad that you aren't getting more of it? which LITERALLY YES YOU ARE LIKE!!!! YOU ARE GETTING SO MUCH!!! we could have nothing.

i am not writing anymore because of how badly it effected my mental health -- also, very cool of you to punish me for the first time i was selfish and decided to be kind to myself....in months! <3 slay! but bc i care abt my story and you guys not getting left on a cliffhanger forever and ever, i decided that i would give you everything i have.

like just that part of the ravesey hate that i wrote yesterday...that is one of four parts...of two chapters. there is easily over ten chapters left that will probably be split up like that. nevermind pep where we have at least five chapters left...and you wanted me..to write like 17 chapters??? that would take me maybe all year??? wild??? like no!!! i'm not gonna do that!!! i don't even have to do this!!!! but i want to!!!

I FUCKING LOVE YOU GUYS LIKE ITS VERY LAME TO SPEAK TO ME LIKE THIS???? I HATE THIS!!! BOOOOOO!!! TOMATO!!!

idk...i guess i'm done now. not updating you on this blog, ofc, just with this ask message. which is not going to be the last one. i will keep updating the kind and lovely people on here who have been so wonderful to me and send me faithful, excited asks everyday. those people do not deserve to be punished because you decided you wanted to be an ahole in my askbox. i am not writing for you.

thank you for supporting my work. thank you for enjoying my updates on here which -- i have been doing this for monthes with no complaints and people send me more asks everyday, so i assume we all enjoy getting them in this format? even tho its off ao3? enough to have 42 pages of asks? also i have not written for months...this is not news, i think. we knew this was coming -- needless to say, i love you very much and i don't care if this is tiring. it is worth it for you.

to those who have been kind to me, thank you very much. i love you and i hope you heal. thank you for healing me.

and you, a-hole anon????

please check yourself.

both metaphorically and into a psychiatric hospital.

cheers! <3 mazel! :)

-uncle nina

#this made me #really fucking mad #but more than that it made me really sad #like i don't have to do this you guys #i seriously don't have to do this #i do this because i love you very much #and i think you deserve answers like i could close this blog and never ever post again and you would never get closure #but i don't want that because you send so many asks so clearly you want answers to stuff #and i have so many people who are so kind 99.9% of yall are so nice to me like my readers are so nice that i am in SHOCK #like i am so sad that you think i dont work hard like #i work very hard on these? they can take me 30 mins? 3 hours? weeks? like...UGH i am sooooo this fucking sucks guys #please don't treat me like this like i want to cry #this is very mean spirited and uncool #if you don't like the way i do my thing you can click off like?#there was no reason to send me this #idk i'm...this hurt my feelings lol please do not send another content creator something like this this is very foul #this is worse than when someone said are you ever updating #the :/ face was soooooo FIGHT ME IN THE STREET #YOU WONT!!! YOU WONT BITCH!!!

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mostlymaudlin · 1 year

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Top 5 vs Personal 5

List your top 5 fics ranked by kudos on AO3. are you surprised by what's most popular to your readers? then provide your ranking of your personal top 5 fics, and tag a few fellow writers!

ty for the tag @sillyunicorn :D this is cute and also interesting. i tag @starwarned @urban-sith @tea-brigade @fortheloveofexy @nanatsuyu @justadreamfox @jaydreams @halfpintpeach

im actually going to do my Personal 5 first because that's what i want above the read more cut 😂 no one is escaping looking at my babies.

Thorns (E), 18k, andreil // a post-canon fic where andrew and neil cope with doing a long distance relationship when u both have fatal levels of attachment issues lol. i spent a stupid long time on this fic for the word count, but there is love in every single word. i like this universe bc it's what i want for post-canon andreil. no one gave them the tools for this shit, but i love the idea that they will always figure out how to be together, even if its messy.

No Turning Back (E), 31k, andreil // this is perhaps recency bias, but i think this is the best thing ive ever written. i have a hard time summarizing it.. but it's an au where the conflict is almost entirely in andrew's head, which of course means he Causes Many Problems. i actually built this fic out from Andrew's fucked up internal journey, which was cool for me -- like, the main plot was developed to fit his character arc. i think that's probably not rocket science or unique but it was my first time doing it that way!

We Can Live Forever (T), 46k, andreil // i used to not like hs aus and then i wrote a huge one lol. its childhood best friends-lovers, and centered on this ridiculous lip sync serenade fundraiser ?? i made them all dance. a lot. sometimes its serious, but its mostly very silly. i wrote it w the intention of giving people that "read until 4am screaming into ur pillow bc cute aggression" feeling that so many fics have given me, and the feedback ive gotten implies ive succeeded, so im rly proud of that!!

Stoner AU (E), 21k, snowbaz // i'm cheating a bit because this is a series, but i almost consider this thing to be like a collection of sitcom episodes lol. it's a normal au, simon is a weed guy and baz buys from him and also falls in love w him. theres a lot of penny and shep and its all just very FUNNY imo. and they are all so fucking devoted to each other in kind of unhinged ways. i love rereading these fics.

I'll Come Back To You (T), 6.9k, andreil // ok, for 1: that's the exact word count. every time i fix typos on rereads i have to edit it to preserve the wc. but 2: this fic is Not Silly or Smutty LOL. it's probably my plottiest/most serious fic in some ways -- it deals w, like, multiple dimensions ?? and amnesia. and loneliness. i'm proud of the ambiguity, because i tend to be a writer that punches you in the face with The Theme. this one leaves a lot for the reader to figure out (to the dissatisfaction of some commenters lol), but i like that you have to think about it a bit.

ok, AO3 Top 5 under the cut!

all of these are andreil, because aftg fandom is a lot bigger than carry on </3.

boyfriend privileges (T), 4k // i should not have been surprised that this did the numbers, but i was kind of shook when my ao3 inbox blew up like never before. it's fanfic catnip -- a 5+1 post-canon with resolvable angst interspersed with soft moments. i wrote it in like 2 days and didn't edit, and aint that just the way of ao3 lol.

flashes of intimacy (T), 7k // this is a series of fifteen <500 word fics that i add to pretty often, so it also makes sense that it's got a lot of readers! ive always been proud of my ability to write short, so it makes me happy that it's up here. it wld probs be #6 on my personal rating.

Inside Thoughts (T), 1.5k // andrew gets his wisdom teeth out and is a goober about it. one of my first aftg fics -- i think it's up here bc it's almost a year old. i am not passionate abt it tbh, i wrote it kind of as a joke one night while i was high lmfao

Do Not Disturb (T), 2k // another of my first aftg fics that i kind of dont care much about hahaha. it's another catnip situation, a post-canon moment where neil panics & unconsciously calls andrew, similarly to how he does in canon. and then they r soft <3

Tequila Sunrise (M), 4k // i know people love this one -- it's also my most bookmarked. it's fun!! drunk neil!! but i almost can't read it anymore lol. there's some prose im proud of in there, but there's also some lazy characterization choices i made bc i had no idea it would get so many hits. its hard for me as the Characterization Guy to reconcile that hahaha.

ok as usual that was long-winded as hell. i love 2 talk abt writing :) also i feel bad 4 the lack of snowbaz representation here lol, but i think that i'm 1. better at writing andreil and 2. have gotten a lot better at writing while i was unemployed the last few months. i think a lot abt taking snowbaz for another whirl now, but consider: then i wouldn't get to write abt Andrew Minyard :(

#my writing #i overwrote this lol. oh well i had fun

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chordsykat · 1 year

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Kloktober 2022 Day 27 - Fave Trope or Guilty Pleasure

The trope: A plot-mandated friendship failure (on multiple fronts but largely in the form of a band breakup) The guilty pleasure: Reading old fanfiction The bonus guilty pleasure: Sparkleface A little of both for you guys, today -- from my old fanfic. :) Art above is equally old, but I feel, quite fitting.

Some spoilery things in here if you haven't gotten to read Dethkomic to its current update. Too, this one takes place towards the very end of my very, very, stupidly long series. The girls live in an off-Mordhaus mansion called Kirsche Hall and have a ridiculous manager by the name of Jenna Syde in this one. Those things, along with a lot of what I wrote 10 years ago aren't as canon as they once were, so... maybe this is more like an AU? Maybe an AU of an AU? Honestly I have written these characters in so many forms now, I have no idea which is the real U.

But who cares, eh?! It's MTL and the canon universe is practically bound to get reset anyway. Enjoy!

--- The next morning, Nita Nirvana’s eyes flitted open as her nose recognized a distinct scent she hadn’t been privy to in almost as long as the time she’d spent living in Kirsche Hall: the smell of burnt toast.

More than curious, she pushed the black comforter of her pillow-overloaded mattress aside and got to her feet. Her silk robe was a beautiful ocean of ebony waiting crumpled on the floor next to her bed, and she eased it over her bare shoulders while stepping into a nearby pair of sandals. The scent of burning bread, among other harshly toasted things for sure, was heavier in the air when she walked through her bedroom door and out into the upstairs walkway. Not only that, she could finally hear Sparkles screeching angrily about something, a couple pans clattering around, and the ironically far more calm tone of William Murderface. All of this racket seemed to be centered entirely within the room directly below her - the house’s kitchen. She headed downstairs and, after a brief jaunt through Kirsche Hall’s never-ending dining area, Nita pushed open one of the surgical steel doors to the cook’s quarters. Normally, it was a picture of pristine sterility, but that wasn't the case this morning. Whole bags of flour had been torn open, upended and emptied of their contents which powdered the floor in generous amounts. With them were about three dozen eggs and more than a few gallons of milk. “Gordon Ramsay’s worst kitchen nightmare come to life…” the vocalist said to herself as she tried to find sturdy footing among the far larger spaces of slick surface.

The engineers of said nightmare, Murderface and Sparkles, were easily spotted beyond a jumble of pots, pans, and utensils which, naturally, hung on meat hooks from the ceiling. The duo was stove-side and engaged in a display of fantastic culinary mediocrity. Murderface was putting out a small fire which had sprung up on the corner of the cookbook he was holding while simultaneously ignoring about a dozen more mini-conflagrations going off in the pan before him. Sparkles had apparently been cracking eggs on her forehead. Large portions of yolk and shell smeared across her hairline and trailed down her unkempt bangs as evidence to this. “Awh!” Murderface sputtered, his face falling as he noticed Nita. He put the scorched cookbook down (atop another fire) on the counter. The act, by itself seemed to admit defeat. “We were gonna schurprische you!” Sparkles smiled toothily at Nita before she became distracted by the small fires. She put her hand on one and let it burn her for several seconds before pulling her palm away and hissing at it, then beating the licks of flame into oblivion with her fists. Ever since their joint attempt at a concert in Finland, Dethklok’s bassist had been spending more time at the Baen-Shee homestead, which was to Nita, a bit odd at first. Regardless, his presence had lent itself well to curb the dull sting at the back of everyone’s minds which reminded them all that Eden Nightwish was still in Mordhaus’ hospital, and still not conscious. Murderface was sometimes an opinionated, uncouth lummox with no shortage of bad ideas, but he was always kind at heart and in the very least, entertaining. Nita shot the mustachio’d man a sweet smile, “That’s so thoughtful, you guys!” She paused to look around the room and assess the damage more closely, then - It appeared extensive but salvageable. “Since I’m up, if you wanted to still cook breakfast, I’ll be happy to help. Not like I have anything better to do.” Just as she said that, a Klokateer came through the door and singled Nita out of the crowd immediately, “My lady, your manager wishes to speak with you in her office.” The female bodyguard spoke quickly and nearly slid off her high-heel boots and onto the milk and egg coated ground. When she finally had it together, she added, “It appears to be an urgent matter, majesty.” “Yes, of course.” Nita arched an eyebrow back at her two friends before, very carefully, following the gear out the door, “I’ll be back soon, guys. Keep it hot.” As she was leaving, she caught a glimpse of Sparkles pouring oil onto one of the stove fires. “That schouldn’t be a problem!” Nita heard Murderface yell just before the kitchen doors swung closed behind her. The office of Jenna Syde, Baen-Shee’s manager, wasn’t very far from the kitchen and dining area, so Nita was privy to the sounds of crashing pans and more of Sparkles’ screaming even after she found herself just outside the room’s threshold. Nita knocked timidly, but apparently loud enough to be heard. Jenna threw open the door to her chambers a second later. “Well!” was the first thing said by the offbeat manager-producer as she led Nita inside with a silly grin plastered on her face, “We’re a complete failure! Can you believe that?” “What?” Nita said, stumbling at those words in her march alongside Jenna to her desk. “What do you mean by that..?”

Jenna circled around to her chair, propped her thick boots on the fine cherry wood of her desktop and knocked over three recently emptied bottles of what must have been her breakfast beer in the process, “I mean Baen-Shee isn’t selling… and this last concert fiasco, since it was all a big hoax anyway, only put us further under…” Nita shook her head in disbelief as she sat down in the big leather chair. “Wait - hold on. Nobody’s picking us up now?” Her lips remained half-parted after she asked the question, and she could feel a hitch forming in the back of her throat. “Afraid not, kiddo.” Jenna said, picking up a stack of papers, “When the band went on hiatus the first time after Cherry passed away, there was risk signing you. Now Eden’s in the hospital and people assume there’s going to be another long wait before we get this thing back on the road again. Venues don’t like doing business with bands that are only half-together, no matter how good that one half may be.”

“Well, we can find another guitarist if we have to… we did before…” Nita wanted to bite her tongue. The idea squeezed at her heart for so many reasons. The thought of Eden not playing with them was made all the more bitter by the realization that it would only happen should the unthinkable come to pass, and the girl died. Nita wasn’t sure she could handle losing two band mates in the short course of one years’ time. “It’s worse than that, honey.” Jenna ducked down momentarily to grab another beer from the mini-fridge under her desk, “Caj is gone again.” “WHAT?” This news nearly drove Nita to an immediate breakdown… and simultaneous rage. “The guard who was on perimeter duty last night told us he saw her leaving. Naturally, you’re all free to come and go as you please, so he didn’t stop her. He gave us this…” Jenna pushed a piece of paper - obviously crumpled and then unfolded again, toward Nita’s side of the desk. The girl picked it up and her eyes immediately set to work devouring each word. She didn’t expect the story told by the meager little parchment, though, and the closer she came to the end, the further her eyelids drooped and her expression turned more pained. “I… never knew… she never told me about…” “She didn’t tell anyone!” Jenna interrupted with what almost came off as an appreciative snicker, “I almost think it’s a stunt. That PR nightmare from last week of hers…” Nita was on the defensive, then, crumpling the letter anew, “You think she faked this note and made up a crazy story so she could go AWOL again, just because she got into a little hot water over a leaked video? Honestly, Jenna!” The manager took a hefty swig from her bottle of Budweiser before continuing, “What I’m sayin’, kiddo, is that I don’t know enough about The Great Dane, and her associated band of closet-skeletons to honestly tell concert promoters that we’ll be right back to square one in no time. That’s my good name going down, there. Not yours, not Caj’s, not Baen-Shee’s. Mine” To stamp some finality on her words, Jenna then let out a loud belch that likely would have impressed even Nathan Explosion had he been present.

“I can’t believe I’m hearing this…” Nita said, rubbing two circles around either side of her head. “Well, it’s just the business, babe. I wouldn’t worry about it. You were a respectable household name before this whole thing started, anyway. Besides, you’ve already had one offer…” “What? Who?” “Hah! Rikki Kixx!” Nita’s throat clenched, “You’re joking.” And she hoped Jenna was, though her hands stopped moving around her temples, then.

#old stuff #fanfiction #yeah i know #how about that?#kloktober 2022 #my writing #and that's how Nita ended up on tour with all new all sober Snakes N Barrels #or is it?#(it isn't)

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kinnbig · 1 year

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tagged by @kissporsche and @aikinn thank you ✨

fave colour: yellow or pastel pink 💛🌸

currently reading: omgg technically less by andrew sean greer but i started it in august before the dissertation dread kicked in and still haven’t finished it :( which sucks cause it’s good

last song: lil nas x tales of dominica (one of my favourites from this album! also one of my favourites in general)

last series: the eclipse finale! it was pretty good!

last movie: i genuinely don’t remember the last time i watched a movie lol

currently working on: my gd dissertation… i don’t even want a masters any more at this point i’m so done 😭 this shit is never ending.

…perhaps it would be ending faster if i wasn’t also actively working on multiple fanfics lol:

huuge fic lovingly working-titled ‘the Big-centric pain and sadness compilation’ - canon-compliant Big and Ken backstory spanning from several years pre-canon up to the events of episode 10. ft lots of pining and manipulation and kind of fucked up smut (rated E, 10+ chapters, first chapter nearly ready to post (and multiple completely random chapters complete… why was chapter 7 the first one I wrote?!))

multi-chapter third part to my RamKing series ‘silence and patience’ which is just gonna be several chapters of early relationship fluff and smut and is also basically a KingRam manifesto (rated E, 5 chapters(?), first chapter probably 80% complete)

anOther RamKing fic set in early canon, where bisexual icon King takes his friends to a gay bar and sees Ram flirting with some guy. he can’t believe Ram would give a stranger so much attention but ignore him most of the time and decides the solution is to scare the guy away and aggressively flirt with Ram himself. i’m sure u can guess where it’s going. (rated E, oneshot, 40% complete)

also on the back burner:

BigKen friends with benefits fic (E, oneshot)

some very pre-canon KinnBig smut (E, oneshot)

Porsche and Chay 5+1 - 18-year-old Porsche realises 13-year-old Chay is gay but hasn’t talked to Porsche about it. 5 times where, over the years, Porsche goes out of his way to be the ultimate most supportive ally ever to make sure Chay knows he can tell him, and 1 time Porsche talks to Chay about his own bisexuality. (T, oneshot)

Share 10 different favourite characters from ten different pieces of media in no particular order, then tag 10 people 🎥🎬📺:

Big (KinnPorsche)

Ram (the RamKing show/My Engineer)

Shiv Roy (Succession)

Zuko (Avatar: the Last Airbender)

Klaus Hargreeves (The Umbrella Academy)

Michelle Mallon (Derry Girls)

Sayid Jarrah (Lost)

Paula Proctor (Crazy Ex Girlfriend)

Eric Effiong (Sex Education)

Ianto Jones (Torchwood) (a throwback to one of my earliest blorbos lmao)

tell me why i immediately forgot every piece of media i’ve ever enjoyed in my life…

i’m doing this quite late (sorry) so i’m not sure who has already done this/been tagged so! If you see this and want to do it then consider yourself tagged

😎✌️

#thank u ✨🌸💖🏳️‍🌈🥰#this was fun 😁#also if ur reading this consider it an open invitation to talk to me about any of my fics or blorbos hehe #i love to Discuss #tag game #darcey.txt

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hollyhorseheads · 1 month

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hi hollyhorseheads all 3 of us. i want a sideblog just for them... fair warning this blog will probably not be used for very long but if you stumble across it like wayyy into the future u are welcome to send me an ask or a message or whatever because this is just a sideblog of my main & i still check sideblog notifs cause it bugs me if i dont make the notification symbol go away LOL

main blog if u follow me on here thats where ill follow back from!!! also where i like posts from (duh) and if you wanna see me yap abt / rb stuff ur free 2 follow

art blog if i post art of these guys it will probably be on my art blog (but ill rb it to here)!! i also post art from other stuff i like but be prepared for long hiatuses 💔💔💔 i tend to go through phases of drawing multiple times a day every day to not drawing for months on end LOL

writing / playlists tumblr this one was SUPPOSED to be my blog for posting fandom spotify playlists i made and then also fanfics i wrote but um. well i do just end up rambling on there occasionally. IF UR LEGALLY A MINOR (or just dont wanna see that shit) PLEASE FILTER OUT MY 18+ POSTS ON THERE THANK U!!!! anyway if i write anything / make a playlist for them (or just want to post abt music and them in general) itll be on there but i will of course rb it here :3

yeah ur free to follow any of my blogs idm!!! and ur absolutely free to unfollow at any time too no hard feelings <3 my final warning is that i do fixate on stuff and change interests sometimes (not, like, often, but a few times a year usually) so youre welcome to follow when im into one thing and unfollow when im into another! my point is that ur always getting a mixed bag with me LOL... the only constant is my love of nonbinary yuri headcanons. hashtag proud himejoshi for LIFE!

thats it i think. oh you can call me mona or ramona i think thats my most used name atm... idm about pronouns or masc/fem/neu terms. use whatevers funniest for the bit. ok? awesome :]

#what do i even make my original post tag #uhhhh fuck i dunno #.txt #going for something simple... i can always change it #l

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andromedamemes · 6 years

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oooh my god I need to tell you guys this story

so i was trying to recover my old music library because it wasn’t on any of my working computers/devices and lord knows I pirated most of that shit so itunes wasn’t any help...

so I bust out my old ipod, blow off the dust, and manage to find a suitable charger.... it turns on and I’m like.. yes.. finally this is it!

and then it asks for my password.....

I try my usuals from like 5 years ago but none of them are working, so I do some investigative work. Firstly, I was definitely neck deep in the 1d fandom at the time, my ipod background was various pictures of Harry’s weird expressions during 1DDay photoshopped onto a picture of space. Yes that’s right friends, I wasn’t always a space/memes blog, I was a full on 1d/memes blog back in the day. Futhermore, I was big on shipping h&l so it might have had something to do with that.

additionally, i was very lazy, so i didn't want anything too long or had numbers or capitals

So I type in a 1d related password thinking it wont work. it’s like the ‘password1′ of the 1d fandom...

and it fucking worked I swear to god.

Anyway, i dare you guess my password. send me an ask or comment on this post, I will be watching. First to get it right gets a sense of Pride and Accomplishment.

#1d #one direction #jesus christ iw as deep in #deeeeeep #i wrote multiple fanfics u guys #it was bad

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batlingsstuff · 3 years

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|| DREAM SMP HEADCANONS ||

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

hello! this is my first time doing headcanons, and i just want to clarify some things:

sadly, i won't be doing requests because i'm busy af with school and i dont want to dissapoint anyone, but you can drop some suggestions and i would think about it! it would be really nice :)

also i won't be writing romantic headcanons for minors or those who are uncomfortable with it, but i can do platonic headcanons for them! ^^

i won't be doing nsfw headcanons either, because i'm uncomfy with sexualizing real people and just writing nsfw in general :)

also, please tell me if someone is uncomfortable with fanfics and/or headcanons and i will erase that part as fast as possible, thanks for passing by! - batling

✦ means platonic

✦ characters : ranboo, tubbo, tommy, philza, techno and jschlatt

♥ means romantic

♥ characters: quackity, wilbur, nihachu, dream, george, sapnap, eret, karl, fundy and bbh

keywords:

(y/n) : your name

(n/n) : nickname

(p/p) : pizza place

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

“As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.” – John Green

┌────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┐

SLEEPOVERS

---

GENDER NEUTRAL

└────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┘

♥ Quackity

oh boy

i just have two words for this one: pure chaos

he will punch you with a pillow if you try to sleep

and you will be MAD at this

grabbing a pillow and hitting him RIGHT IN THE FACE with all your strenght

he'll probably fake cry about it, saying that you hurt him

after a while of pillow fighting, you guys got tired and plopped into the bed, snuggling into eachother and just enyoing the comfortable silence before drifting to sleep

♥ Wilbur

you two will probably blast hamilton and scream the lyrics till the neighbours wake up and you get angry knocks at your door

and you will laugh at that, lowering the speaker's volume and telling him to lower his voice aswell to avoid your neighbours calling the police

then you'll eat snacks and talk about anything that pops into your mind, laughing at the most silly jokes

he will sing sweet songs to you, making you fall asleep to his calming voice

summary: fluff

♥ Nihachu

you and her will bake pastries at a very late hour

she REALLY enjoys baking with you bc she thinks it's a great way to spend time with you

all this girl wants is to spend her time by your side, doing particularlly anything like streaming, baking, playing games and going outside for a walk and/or shopping

once you finished baking, she will kiss your cheek multiple times. that's her way to tell you that you did a great job :)

you'll spend the rest of the night cuddling, eating your pastries and watching some random movie, commenting about how bad it is and laughing

♥ Dream

bruh

this bitch will speedrun the sleepover

is it possible to speedrun a sleepover? maybe

you'll spend the rest of the night probably playing uncharted 3: drake's deception in his old ps3

after a while, you guys got bored from uncharted and went to his pc to play amnesia: the dark descent

there are 2 options:

you will be scared as fuck and will avoid looking at the screen when you think something bad will happen or when some body will come out from a drawer

or you will be totally chill with it, laughing hard when clay pisses his pants for real when he encounters the gatherer

you named the gatherer 'bob' :)

♥ George

he'll take you to the rooftop

and pushes you so you fall to your death

i mean

he gets blankets and pillows so you can stargaze together

he'll teach you the constelations while pointing them, excited about every single one of them

"look (y/n), that's the ursa major!"

he'll have hot chocolate prepared too, so you don't get cold while stargazing

you try your best to not fall asleep on the rooftop

but eventually fail

when he notices you're asleep, he stops talking about the constellations and carries you to your bedroom, giving you a goodnight kiss and leaving you in your bed so you can have a peaceful rest

♥ Sapnap

hey mamas

i don't know what sapnap will do in a sleepover so i will just improvise B)

you will watch anime together

not any kind of anime, like that romance-comedy bullcrap

no fuck that

you will watch the classy angsty anime like madoka magica

WATCH IT IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY

you will fucking cry because of literally anything that happens to the characters

"(y/n) why are you crying it's just a show"

'IT'S NOT ANY SHOW SAPNAP IT'S FUCKING MADOKA MAGICA OF COURSE I'M GOING TO CRY'

the last chapter made you fucking cry harder

AUTHOR HERE I WAS CRYING SO MUCH WHEN IT ENDED

yeah you will basically watch anime with him, cry about it and he will comfort you and bring you a glass of water so you don't have a terrible headache after it

I KNOW THIS HEADCANON SUCKED I'M SO SORRY

♥ Eret

KINGG <3

you two will plan a picnic in your yard

yes your yard

he'll bring a ton of snacks and you'll buy a few drinks

you two spend the rest of the picnic talking about your future and enjoying the snacks

then, he'll make you stand up and will teach you how to dance tango

and of course you will mess everything up

and you even stomped on his feet accidentally, making him wimper

but he brushed off the pain and laughed at your concerned face

after calming down his laughter, he gave you a passionate kiss and hugged you tightly

i love eret ok

♥ Karl Jacobs

this man.

this man is the definition of sweet

you'll spend the night cuddling and making cute pet names for eachother

he will definetely give you a great back massage if you're stressed

then he'll start writing love letters full of things he adore of you

and you'll do the same for him

after that, you will share your letters and just snuggle and smile at the sweet things you guys wrote for eachother

he will deffo shower you with kisses when he finishes reading your letter, telling you that you're the nicest person on earth

and that he loves you so so much

♥ Fundy

i'm a huge fundy simp ok

he will bring his piano to your house and you guys will compose a melody together

he will let you sit on his lap while you play the piano/keyboard with him

fundy will basically teach you how to play basic piano songs

you asked him if you guys could play megalovania together

he said no :(

but still you got to play nice songs together without messing up

and when you got the hang of it, he snuggled his face in your neck and kissed you there genly

and when you got tired, he started playing very calming songs and you fell asleep in his lap, snuggling into his chest

he gently carried to your room and will sleep beside you putting a fair distance so you can have a comfortable sleep!

♥ BadBoyHalo

bbh supremacy

he will get rat ready so you can snuggle with her too :)

you guys will mainly play with rat and talk about life in general

he will call you tons of cute pet names

ofc he will call you muffin it's bbh who we're talking about

he will talk about how bad he wants to spend the rest of his life with you

after a while, he will take you to his kitchen and start making muffins together

he will guide you on how to bake 'em though

you guys had a great time making muffins and cuddling with him and rat :)

══════ ∘◦❀◦∘ ══════

✦ Ranboo

tall mf gives the best piggy back rides

when he gets to your house there is a 100% chance he will bump his head on the door frame

and there is a 100% chance you will make fun of him because of that

"(y/n) please stop laughing my head hurts :("

you'll give him some ice to put on his head while you two play minecraft on your ps4

you will bring snacks too and ask him if his head is better

"yeah, thank you (n/n)"

he will pull you in a hug so you can be comfy together while you play good ol' minecraft

because ranboo surely doesn't play anything besides fucking minecraft

stfu that video of him playing spooky's jump scare mansion doesn't exist

✦ Tubbo

SWEET BE BOYY <3

he will gift you a bee plushie

expect a lot of (FRIENDLY) hugs from him

like fundy, you guys will play piano together

you guys are most likely to prank call some random numbers AND your friends

and you accidentally called some random pizza place

"hello! this is (p/p), may i take your order?"

you were nervous and didn't know what to say

UNTIL YOU CAME UP WITH A GREAT IDEA

"hello? are you there?"

'hi yes, i would like to order 7 extra large pepperoni pizzas to (tommy's adress).'

"oh- okay! uhm- they will arrive in a few hours. are you okay with that?"

'yes ma'am, thank you.'

when you ended the call, you couldn't help but burst out laughing, knowing that tommy will be so mad at you guys-

✦ Tommy

like quackity, PURE. CHAOS.

you guys will obviously stream your sleepover

doing a q&a stream :)

tubbo and wilbur will probably crash your stream and start spamming things like 'MEETUP??' and 'DIDN'T GET AN INVITE'

you guys laughed and added them to the call

"WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU GUYS INVITE ME?" wilbur shouted

'i'm sorry willlll'

you kept playing minecraft with wilbur, tubbo and quackity too since he crashed your stream like an hour later

after the stream, you got up and plopped on the mattress that was on the floor

"tired?"

'yeah'

"okay, good night big (initial)"

✦ Philza

POG

YEAHHH SLEEPOVER WITH THE MINECRAFT GOD

AND KRISTIN'S THERE TOO :)))

and oh god you ADORE kristin

i'm pretty sure she's a total sweetheart

it would be like having a sleepover with your parents

only that it's less boring

you guys will watch a movie together, you will be in one side of the couch eating snacks while phil and kristin are in the other cuddling

you'll eventually bug them about it

after the movie, you fell asleep early and philza noticed, talking to kristin about it too

and wrapped a blanket around you so that you get a good rest :)

✦ Technoblade

mr. blood god teaches you the arts of the CRAFT.

yeah i mean it's techno what else does he play besides minecraft

he will play bedwars w/ u, teaching you how to pvp

"bro you kinda suck tbh"

'stfu techno'

he will comment about how bad you are, but tries to help you get better anyways

and when you do a very poggers gamer move, he praises you

and when he praises you you're all :)))

after awhile, he gets tired from watching you play minecraft and suggest watching anime

fucking weeb

i mean

other thing you guys do together in a sleepover is playing and commenting about pokemon

if you don't like pokemon get tf out of here /J

i was joking please don't leave i respect your tastes

✦ Jschlatt

ooooh boy

get ready for a session of wii training

that's all you guys will do

play wii sports and some other shit like wii music

he will laugh his ass of if you fall while playing wii fit

but he will eventually help you bc outside his funny and shouty persona, he's a really chill guy and a really nice person!

seriously like have you ever seen a theweeklyslap video?

well expect hearing amazing pep talks from him

bc this man is a legend and knows his way to words and is very good at comforting people :)

sometimes you'll rant to him about anything that's happening in your life, and he will listen to you and give you really helpful advice

and you appreciate him so much for that

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

TYSM FOR READING GUYS, i appreciate it if you made it this far :)

i hope you guys really enjoyed these headcanons, it's my first time doing them and aa i'm a bit nervous about posting this but i'll be fine ig

also i'm sorry if there's a grammatical error, english is not my native language and i'm still learning it :) have a nice day/night, drink water and don't fuck up your sleeping schedule!!

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olde-scratch · 3 years

Text

So I watched LUCIDS 1-4 without any prior knowledge...

and here were my thoughts. I didn’t watch any backstory or anything so enjoy my suffering.

PART 1

“So what happens when the people inside of their dreams go to sleep?” They die

“What happens when we wake up? Do they go on living while we’re not there?” THEY DIE-

“Who are they anyway?” they’re faces that our brain catalogs and stores for later use, although it’s also arguable that every time we dream we go to an alternate reality and inhabit the body of another version of ourselves. Now, were you in a car accident and trapped underwater or-

Are they twins?

(Me tuning out to do something)

“-the squirrel in spongebob was your soulmate, making you a Sandy simp-”

Me, snapping back to the video: hold up-

[missed the part about the worksheet, realized it when i rewatched 10 mins later to make this post]

yall speakin gibberish idk what youre saying-

“I’m gonna go to bed.” bro it literally looks like morning-

“You should get some sleep you look terrible.” i get six hours of sleep a night minimum and i look worse than him shut up bro-

“jump into someone else’s dream” ah i know this con-

why they all got the same face-

haha funni meme

“--an interruptiion can create feedback and tear them apart.” Death. I long for thee.

Is that Karl Jacob’s jacket?

“a second grader” makes me think this is a different school system. [i was wrong? i think?]

“[get him to] eat your apple”

[in the dream sequence] weird dream, but ive had weirder. now, Why Pamper’s-

why does he suddenly have a knife-

“You put a filter on the Dreamscape feed?”

“Technically, you are seven years old.”

???????????

the second hand embarrassment is UGGGHHH

[reading the description] you mean like the guy who was knocked out for 2 minutes on a football field and woke to find he’d dreamt 17 years of his life? oh this shall be Fun

PART 2

[I check the description] “jasper cult” what the fu-

how many camp camp references can i make during this

Is the apple a reference to religion or does the creator just really ilke apples?

“meal.”

“meal?”

meal????

Wait why couldn’t that guy eat the apple? If he wanted it in the fruit bowl, wouldn’t there be a chance of the guy eating it anyways?? Why can’t the guy who brought the apple eat it?

well he’s Dead

[debating if I should read the backstory}

n a h h h h h -

Was he gonna feed the dead guy the apple or something? Why is he upset about the apple in this scene???

oooo the grownups are fightinnnngggg

Is he an antagonist?

HE WROTE A BOOK???

oh now i want food

ESTABLISH JUSTICE ENSURE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITYYYYYYYYYYYYY

“I watched all those aforementioned shows” what shows did i miss something what-

man why you gotta hate on her jane austen fanfic let her live bro

string theory! i can get behind that! sorta-

o no he found the memes-

BOY GOT KNOCKED OUT-

kim there’s people that are dying-

is SHE an antagonist?

quinn? calling himself jasper? u sure hes not just nonbinary? is this just a metaphor for transphobic parenting?

“He died... but somewhere, he grew up.” So is your plan to take a Quinn from a different universe and make him your own, thereby robbing another version of yourself from happiness? When does this ever go well?

Yknow most people, when they lose a kid,,,, kinda,,,,,,, dont go on a ceaseless quest to find another version of their kid that grew up without knowing that another version of his mother was invading other peoples’ dreams to find and kidnap him,,,,,,,, like aint u got a therapist-

“Once you get past the point of not knowing what’s real anymore, you realize it doesn’t matter.” Well, I Got Called Out-

PART 3

“you’re real, oliver.”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

“you’ve been infected by the anti-love parasite of Mandadon” the amatonormativity is strong

so anyways ive been infected since birth hbu-

“James Jasperson, creator of Japple” did you mean to Fancy Well-Educated Man in a Black Turtleneck? cause the only FWEMBT i allow near me is prof. hidgens

“are you winning?” says the capitalist

why did you rewind to see his face?? you have the same face????? is this just bc the creator doesnt like working with other people cause in that case same but???????

“it’s a bad idea. i’m not gonna do it.” we’ve all been there. and we’ve all done it.

looks like me trying to study. (i say, a person who has studied a total of five minutes throughout their entire life.)

your “Spartan trial” looks like a bunch of guys standing on a hill pretending to be something they’re not. Let The Man Bring His Snacks.

eat the apple.

is this your first existential crisis or something what a loser lets all point and laugh

“One of you should be spared, the other shall’nt.” did you mean shant or was that a choice-

yall gonna get called out for talking shut UP

“sorry if this is too personal, btw. are you okay?”

me, confused and half understanding what’s going on and also needing to sleep cause its almost one in the morning but wanting to finish what i can find of lucids which i only starting watching cause i saw an animatic of ranboo and dream w audio from it: i don’t know anymore

“i just want my life back... i was gonna get married-” AREN’T YOU LIKE SEVEN-

ay man if this is a sacrificial cult yall gotta get daniel-

UPDATE: I H A V E N O T F O U N D I T -

“oliver”

I F O U N D I T -

WHICH ONE IS QUINN?? WHO’S JASPER???? WHICH ONE IS BENJAMIN???? I THOUGH BENJAMIN WAS SEVEN BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED WHAT-

oliver. eat the apple.

“Can you still have memories even when you’re dreaming?” One time I woke up to my alarm and fell back asleep and in my dream I remembered that I had class in a few minutes and my dream self woke my real self up so fast I thought I was gonna get whiplash. Anyways, I was late to class bc of my computer but that doesn’t matter.

NOPE I FOUND IT. HERE’S THE AUDIO. THE ANIMATIC ONE. FINALLY.

im thinking car crash. but also maybe murder. but also maybe both? is it raining or was he drowning? is he in a coma? hmmmmmm?

wait olivers the one with the apple does that mean he’s the one dreaming? is the ending gonna be him and jasper (quinn? idk) fighting against ben and mrs hills about jasper eating the apple to save oliver from the dream? hmmmmmmmmmm-

waitwaitwait i thought oliver was 7 how is benjamin 7 years younger than him if they look the same age what what what explain america explain what you mean arkansaw-

are the cuts on his nose plot-relevant or

“What if you hadn’t been driving?” So I was right about the car accident but Mrs. Hills still said he was seven so did i mishear her say that BENJAMIN was seven? but even then oliver would be 14 and that would still be illegal-

“How are you feeling?”

“Like you’re a pretty bad therapist.”

mood

“--it makes it all bearable to have power over the stories we write in our heads” that’s why i write fanfiction

HE’S GOT THE NOTEBOOK HE’S GONNA WRITE SOMETHING ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

WHAT YOU MEAN AN EXPERIMENT THAT’S HIS NAME-

[upon reading the description] so i was right.

wait was that supposed to be the twist in part 2 about the apple in his pocket is that what the existential crisis was about i thought it was because he was introduced to the multiple worlds theory-

PART 4

wait wasnt the other one january 2018 why we going back to 2017-

appol

“--the future and the past all already exist” mhm yep figured this out long ago

there was simultaneously a point in time in which i hadn’t known about this, had been looking it up, had been watching it, and had been writing an ending to this post, and had been posting it the next morning before class. that time is both now and not now. Welcome To The Multiverse Theory or whatever its called-

“--my favorite scene of the movie is waking up next to you.” Mine is eating fast food as I listen to AJJ and play Minecraft. We are not the same.

Now I’m hungry but it’s 1 in the morning and i already put my retainer in god fu-

[reading description] what do you mean previously??? she did that in the first episode????????

[still on description] WHAT DO YOU MEAN WILL QUINN BITE THE APPLE AND GO TO BENJAMINS REALITY ISNT THIS OLIVERS REALITY AND HE HAS TO GET BEN TO BITE THE APPLE WHY IS APPLE CAPITALIZED IS THIS THE DOING OF THE FWEMBT

i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have wa-

[description] oh ive been spelling quinn right the whole time nice

i hope she rejects you /j

WAIT BENJAMIN WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE

ISNT HE IN SECOND GRADE-

HE IS SEVEN YEARS OLD HOW IS HE GETTING MARRIED ARE THERE TWO BENJAMINS THAT WE’RE FOCUSING ON-

bro get out of the road ull get hit

how do you knOW WHICH ONE IS QUINN THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON-

wait

hills wants ben to feed quinn the apple bc in his mind, that will give hills and quinn a happy ending and she doesnt want ben to see the apple bc thats gonna mean ben will know that his reality isnt reality at all. so then oliver has to,,,, not let anyone eat his apple? he just has to wake up?

IS HILLS THE VILLAIN AFTER ALL ORRRRR

wait but if ben sees the apple wont he realize that his reality is wrong and his reality will change, making it so that hills doesnt get her son? or is there some time-based rule that says they’re only transported to the reality that the person believes at that moment? or is this another stab at the multiverse thing where an infinite amount of hills gets their happy endings while an infinite amount of hills doesnt and etc etc?

i should have watched the ba-

oooo dramatique

they’re in a time loop?

nope thats a new powerpoint

wait so theyre,,,, no-

wait-

nvm-

IS THE BEN WE KNOW AN ADULT GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE OR NOT-

“they were actually pretty nice” didnt they throw someone off a cliff-

oh so it got confusing THEN??? NOT BEFORE?????

“it all seemed so real.” is that Not the point of vivid REM sleep hallucinations-

is oliver gonna show ben the apple and ruin hills’ whole operation

WHO ARE ALEX AND RYAN-

“what’s 25-8″ bro dont do this to me-

yep hes gonna show the apple

ayyy the guy who stole karl jacobs jacket it back

the second hand embarrassment is back and I Hate It

all that happens in episode ONE??? bro get some better writers that is bad pacing

“it’s the best!” wait until season eight. no show has a good season eight.

quinn knows about the apple thing w the dreams and multiverse and realities dont he

YOU KILLED HIM

NOT KARL JACOBS NOOOOO HES ALREADY DIED ONCE

oliver is v relatable

wHaT iN tArNaTiOn-

lemme hear that explanaton again-

is bill cipher gonna show up? i hope bill cipher shows up. i miss gravity falls

“ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” moooooooood

did hills murder quinn

is your family the jasper cult

TOXXIICCCCCC get that lady out of your life quinn that is so toxic

“ ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree! ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT’S THE END NO WHAT WHY NO

The Adventures of Benjamin and Oliver

he is Not Good

ope-

wait so ben is equal parts an adult AND a child?? okay that clears a lot up

I MEAN HE WAS RIGHT THO BEN U CAN’T REALLY ARGUE ON THAT-

ew get off the floor

butterfly effect, multiverse theory, memory decay, and your imagination ALL exist yall gonna ignore that cause you wanna be famous?

“We already know what the future looks like!”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

to add to the list of bad things: Cats (2019)

YA BOI THINKS IT’S NOT ALREADY FIFTY YEARS TOO LATE TO START FIGHTING CLIMATE CHANGE FFFFF

BINGO BABYYYY

get what what

what mapped-

awwwww he thinks THEY’RE creating the multiverse

you gonna dismiss the multiverse theory bc of something you created in your current reality? loooserrrrrr

ABUSE YOUR GODLIKE POWERS

she draggin that seven year old

a lot makes sense now why didnt i do this first-

Jasper

the food shortages-

bro that calculators like 90 bucks at walmart

imagine meeting a stranger and they know Everything about your life like that’s gotta be so weird

what’s even weirder is them telling you you’re the deity of a cult that sacrifices animals

THAT FOURTH WALL BREAK WAS-

KARL JACOBS IS DEAD NOOOOOO

ooohhh there’s context for that

OOOOHHHH THERE’S CONTEXT FOR THIS TOOOO

w h a t -

W H A T -

Conclusion:

it’s 2 in the morning and i need sleep but hOOOOO MY GODS THAT WAS GOOD IS IT OVER OR NOT IDK ANYMORE IM TIRED THAT WAS CRAZY I HOPE QUINN AND JASPER GO ON TO BE VERY GOOD FRIENDS, AND I HOPE BENJAMIN AND OLIVER STAY VERY GOOD FRIENDS AND I HOPE HILLS FINDS A THERAPIST WAS A LITTLE CONFUSING BUT I ENJOYED IT

if i dream about apples im suing /j /lh

#lucids #nicholas podany #there's a metaphor in there somewhere #but im not gonna be the one to find it #i dont think i dreamed about apples #youre safe for now podany #for now #EDIT #I PUT 'something their not'#WRONG THERE #I HAVE NO EXCUSE #IM SORRY

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hueningshaped · 3 years

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☆ crown | xu minghao and jeon wonwoo

▰ genre: college au! / NO READER INSERT = ORIGINAL CHARACTER / drama, coming of age, romantic, angst ... so original characters and seventeen *gasp* you guessed it — a svt fanfic

▰ word count: about 2.7k

▰ a/n: interest check of a full fledged story i’ve planned but am refraining to put effort in due to possible, complete lack of reads or audience (nobody’s fault but mine). i’d love to hear your feedback! this is chapter one; please let me know if i should continue or just leave it at this LOL

▰ synopsis: jo woolim can’t juggle to save her life, and yet she is somehow managing to stay with her boyfriend: jeon wonwoo, who is possibly cheating on her (again), her strained friendships, fitting into her new school, estranged family, learning to wholly love and forgive herself - in a time unprecedented and searching for the boy of her dreams, xu minghao, the prodigal foreign exchange student. she’s looking for real love, where it’s lacking, where it’s needed, and where it’s always been. by the way, it is not easy!

▰ additional: i listened to epilogue by justin hurtwitz as well as mia and sebastian’s theme (which is somewhat a reprise of it despite it being previous to epilogue, of course) as i wrote it so here u go!

Jo Woolim's feet hurt for multiple reasons, but getting stood up, time and time again, to now, at the age of twenty three is the main contribution to the pain.

The stairs are a pretty humiliating choice of seating, especially to conduct her double digit calls to the person who stood her up, which is her harmless best friend, Sookyung. So, no hard feelings, right? (Right?)

She shouldn't even be that embarrassed because it's not Wonwoo — the Jeon Wonwoo, her very own boyfriend — that stood her up, but she supposes she can be since he'd refused to go and even teased her about wanting to go.

The staircase is fine marble, allowing each footstep to click and clack with each heel that ascends because the party's just beginning. With this venue mimicking a palace, Woolim feels way out of place. Some girls have poofy dresses and others possess thinner material, accentuating the hills of each girl's curves and edges walking in. The boys are all the same, offering the bare minimum. Why does everyone get to be beautiful except her?

Shaking the last thought off, Woolim exerts so much effort to make it look like being alone and ugly doesn't bother her. But, she has to bite the bullet and make a move.

So, her legs spring up, taking her up to the rest of the party. She ignores the heat accumulating from the small of her back to just about every part of her body as she walks in, trying to take everything in and not look like such a loser. Jesus, is everyone looking at her? Are they talking about her?

There were definitely perks to this new university and one of them is the commencement of her class, which arrives in the form of a ceremony with a festivity that follows immediately after. Of course, as a transfer, she gets the initiation that throws a theme, so she has to wear the clown paint and clothes that they inform you to wear to match.

All she is missing is a crown and she's a royal fool.

The Masquerade Ball, as the provost and student affairs staff, had been rumored since before she'd even transferred to the school, which added up to just two months ago. Three months before, she had received that acceptance letter.

She should've known.

Woolim stifles a cough, hoping that the callousing - painful callousing - in her soles due to her starchy dress shoes would be able to mask the humiliation that was beginning to sting behind her eyes.

Of course, she had no identity, but everyone still looks over at her in pity.

The room offered dim lighting, romantic hues of pinks, and citrusy chardonnay beading the adjacent walls. Woolim thirsts for an exit.

The song changes to something unattainable audibly but she must not even be able to hear herself, and before she knows, someone to the side of Woolim bumps into her, back slamming against her body and into the wall.

A frantic, male voice follows, yelping out apologies, as he reaches down to pull her up.

"Jesus, I'm so sorry. Told him to not try and shake what his mama gave him and here we are, here you are, we're both so sorry..." Woolim's vision focuses as she returns to eye level and manages a minor grin at the boy as much of his appearance stands out wonderfully.

With heavily dyed platinum hair, a turquoise suit with rhinestones in various floral designs across the front and wrists, tiger eyes, and led lights curling around the outline of his mask, this boy looked like a lot of fun. A head of chestnut locks remain bowed by his shoulder.

The blond grabs her palm desperately, and he's making wailing sounds.

"I apologize for not only Seokmin but for his upbringing. May Satan guide him in return." He prayed aloud, apology too comical to be real but nonetheless real.

Woolim finally speaks up when the music quiets down just a touch and she doesn't have to stammer to be heard.

"No, you're fine! I can't really see with this mask." She reveals, voice too out there for its own good, but at this, the boy's eyes expand in shock and the bowed head lifts up with intrigue.

"Are you sure? It was pretty rude of us, wasn't it, Seokmin?" He nudges his friend, who's dressed in a simpler, humbler suit, who nods sullenly.

"I'm really, really embarrassed... besides, I think she gets it, Soonyoung."

"Whatever, Oprah singer."

"It's opera!"

The air around them hardens as they begin to bicker. Seokmin places his hands on his hips to deliver his rebuttals but the last thing that Woolim wants is to make two friends fight, let alone cause trouble while she has no date.

"I really am alright! No harm done. I'm just...a little relieved actually that someone's speaking to me," she admits wincingly. There's no need to be as honest as possible, but that doesn't stop her from adding, "I didn't come to the ball with anyone."

The two boys frown and coo, letting out maple syrupy aw's, surprisingly sympathizing with her.

"If it makes you feel any better, our dates were too busy to come, so he and I came together. We also do have another buddy with us, officially making it a threesome!" Soonyoung chats loudly and Seokmin elbows him in the chest at the last comment.

"That's not what a threesome is, Soon."

"Whatever," he waves his hand dismissively. Woolim notices that despite the gravity between the two friends, they remain focused on her. It feels nice. "We did lose him a little while ago though. Maybe he's around here somewhere."

Woolim then levels with them to form a line so she could follow their eye as they peer around the venue, which seems futile since their view is obscured by the angle, decorations, and crowds. The opaque curtains of the many entrances within the main venue gave the illusion that this place was endless. It feels like a trance that went on forever. Reality washes over Woolim and she can feel the weight of being the person one meets and should leave.

"Uh...I'm sorry for getting in your guys' way initially," she announces with a tone that makes her seem unsure of the words on her tongue. Seokmin rolls his head over at her, eyebrows drawing inwardly and puppy dog eyes. She's about to coolly and casually make her leave to no longer bother the boys, but Soonyoung has a different idea.

"Nonsense! It was our fault to begin with, and to repay your gracious hand," Soonyoung then motions to Woolim's bare hand as the other apparels one silky dress glove. "We're trying to at least become an even foursome with you and our friend! God knows where the hell the great Minghao is though!"

"Right behind you." A chilling, oolonged voice speaks up suddenly and startled enough, Woolim's disposition remains unaffected despite her heart catching up to leap in her chest with her delayed reaction.

"Minghao, you wanted to give me a heart attack, didn't you?" Seokmin sighs dramatically, voice hitching to imitate crying. Upon hearing the rich laugh, Woolim tips her head slowly and changes her footing to turn round.

The supposed Minghao peers down at Woolim, unreadable expression through the simple glow of his ivory mask. His raven black hair, lengthy and healthy, adorns his crown like he deserves a throne to come with the apparel.

"We found a person and we found you!" Soonyoung hesitantly wraps his hand around Woolim's wrist, loosely keeping his fingers around to lift and wave.

Minghao snickers delicately.

"I found you actually," he corrects, eyeing his friends, even meeting Woolim's to speak. "And I'm sure you didn't meet because of an accident, right?"

"That was on my part," Woolim speaks up but bites on her bottom lip once his piercing gaze trains upon her. "Sorry..."

"You’ve done no wrong, though?" Minghao's lips stretches into a wonderful smile.

" — yeah, it was Seokmin." Soonyoung mutters, earning himself a tiny shove.

"Minghao, you didn't come here with anyone for a date, right?" Seokmin poses. Woolim notices from his accent that Korean is not his first language but has such a grip with his words, it almost passes one's mind initially.

"Not this time," he answers nebulously. Woolim has to hold back a scowl. "If you’d like, I would love to have you... er, and what's your name?"

She can feel Soonyoung's and Seokmin's excited watch upon her but since this is the first night that she's seen boys be so decent, she figures she might, as well, make their night. They certainly have made hers, after all, excluding this Minghao at the moment.

"I'm Woolim. W-Woolim," she says twice, one too many. Minghao's expression loosens with pleasant awe.

"No surname?" He quizzes, voice too serious for it to be a joke. Woolim feels absolutely no urge to joke around, anxiety fizzing in the very marrow of her bones, so she just shakes her head and hopes he wouldn't see her cocked eyebrow.

"Well," he clears his throat. "I'm Xu Minghao. Seo Myungho. I've got 4 names."

"I've got three," Soonyoung pipes up and everyone groans.

"Soonyoung, don't say it in front of her. That's so gross." Seokmin leans over to shake his head but eye Woolim, in the way that friends who’ve known each other for a long time do. It's a nice feeling.

The music changes, taking a turn from some pop electronica to some heavy pulse from a contemporary rhythm and blues type, and the bass rocks hard enough to shake her ribs.

Minghao locks eyes with her and beams charmingly. He even takes her surprise further by reaching a hand out, fingers long and elegant.

"Would you care to dance with me? Or do you want to take this chance to leave like you were looking for earlier?"

Woolim feels like she merely imagined him asking the last question, which leads her to consider bolting for the doors last minute. Surely, Wonwoo would be home and maybe tonight, he'd be in the mood to love her and like her.

Oh, what she'd do to be loved and liked at the same time.

"Do what you would like," his tone lightens into something sweeter like rosehip. "I don't think you should put your lovely ensemble to waste."

Woolim swallows hard at that and just when she is about to acknowledge the two excited chitters from the other two boys, Minghao takes her hand into his. A cool grip overtakes a clammy warmth. Wordlessly, they somehow sail across the linoleum floor.

All the half hidden faces that had been judging her now evaporate with the blue and green lighting, hues and keys ascending into reds and minors.

Minghao is the type to maintain eye contact and Woolim hates it.

In the back of her mind, bits and pieces of her mind offer memories of what she could see of herself in the reflections. Since Sookyung shared the same favorite color that she did, Woolim went with another: sleet blue. Thin straps hang off her thick shoulders that had a loose, lace cover across her biceps and chest. The hems are riddled with sparkles and flowers. The rest of the silk sticks to each and every edge of her body before drifting off past her chronically swollen ankles with the extra layers adding volume. Her skin appears mottled but overall amber. Her mask is ridden in silvery lace and false white gems and roses. Woolim never knew she could look lovely.

"Do you mind if I hold you close?" He leads, raising their joined hands to sway.

Woolim opens her mouth only to nod. Despite the darkness of the brown and the dim lighting, she sees that his eyes are dotted with flames of the bits of lighting around the venue. The night of his pupils burn right through her and yet she only feels sparks from him, especially once his other hand comes to gently graze her waist.

"Are you okay with this?" He sways them a little more to the right with each movement. Woolim doesn't fancy being this quiet and immobile so she moves his hand into her. His hold is gentle and electrifying as if eternities have passed since she's last been embraced as sweetly as this.

"How long have you gone to this school?" Minghao leans in to better emphasize his question.

"I just transferred, actually," she says as casually as possible since the strokes they make when they sway are becoming too grand for her to catch up.

He's incredibly quick on his feet, so much so that her eyes must drop to follow their direction. Many bodies and pairs round about the two, but they all blend in with the backdrop of the room.

"Follow my counts. One, two, three ─" He drifts into quadrants, slow enough for her to catch up but she continues to knock into his chest. "─ and four. Let's go again. You're alright, I promise. Seokmin used to firmly believe his body was not built at all for anything besides existing."

Woolim glances to the side to see Seokmin rocking his hips next to Soonyoung side to side within frequent increments. They also somehow manage to can-can despite the slow synth and phrases of the song.

"Are you always this quiet?" Minghao breathes and this question catches her off guard. Perhaps taking her breath away had been his intention and he uses this to intertwine their fingers like they're meant to be.

"I’d tell you a lie but since you don't know me, I'm going to tell you the truth; I think I like having you try and get me to talk." Woolim purses her lips tightly as soon as she finds herself smirking.

Minghao steps back, which she nearly leaps to follow, but with the gentlest pivot of his wrist, Woolim twirls like one of the toys she'd wanted all her childhood. Her chest rides past the clouds and her heart pursues, shuttling upwards.

"My goodness, you're a natural!" He comments when he swings her to one side and right back into his embrace. She's smiling.

The song is still playing, and if at all possible, it's hanging above her head precariously and it's just the two of them on the planet.

"Are you sure you don't want me to know you?" He asks once more, and this time, she sheds a few feathers of her insecurities.

The song is still as powerful enough to beat as her heart.

"You ask a lot of questions, Minghao." She manages to grin and their steps narrow to continue to tread the same space.

He peers down at her and the flames are still lit.

"I can't help it. Honestly, honestly. I want to know you truly, honestly."

His loving smile buckles under the bite into his lip. She must be lying when she sees his eyes drop to her mouth. This must be a dream.

"I'm-I'm an open book," she murmurs, captivated by his own lips, and gasps quietly when the hand on her waist is suddenly cupping her jaw. No, she is not, the more authoritative Woolim reprimands silently. But it matters not - she's not loud either.

The song is still playing. It could play for eternities.

He rubs her cheek so tenderly and it has her eyes all a twinkle without realizing.

Wonwoo is no longer a thought. Sookyung no longer crosses her mind.

It only takes a few more countless seconds of wordless confirmation before Minghao dives in to take her lips with his and something behind her rib cage blossoms. He speaks against her mouth, but she doesn't care. She doesn't care.

He continues devouring her lips for the taking and she's left speechless, breaths searching for something to hold onto in between their own mouths.

The daily lows of her life are a fleeting death as she now soars high in a fairy tale-like limelight that only pertains to the two of them. All she's missing is a crown.

Where is her crown? Her mind's whispers fade with every proceeding second. And for once, Woolim feels so good that nothing matters.

#so should i keep going....? *head in hands*#seventeen fluff #seventeen fanfic #svt fanfic #seventeen hoshi #seventeen dk #seventeen the8 #seventeen angst #seventeen college au

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naruto-nerd-anime-lover · 3 years

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Can anyone please recommend me a decent SASUSAKU fanfic with nice plot. Like Ripples, Blind, Quietus, A twist in time, King of Gods and Fly away and others i forgot the names but these are one of my faves. Pretty please? Really need help :D

Below is what I preffer to read

1.NOT OOC (sorry guys but I can't stand fanfic where SS are OOC)

2. Must be COMPLETE (Huhu I also preffer to read fanfics that are complete, because cliffhanger is gonna kill me except for Quietus)

3. MULTIPLE CHAPTERS and not ONE SHOT (but if you have a ONE SHOT that is very decent and not OOC i dont mind)

4. Has a decent plot making it interesting (ACTION,ADVENTURE)

5. Less/minimise dialogue (what i mean i read some fanfics that are more into a dialogue rather than explaining the situation so the readers can imagine the rest)

6. I also preffer post 699, SS travels but its ok if its not as long they are not OOC

Please help me. Thank you so much guys. Love u all

And if there are SS who loves SS travels fanfic i really would like to recommend FLY AWAY by BlueAngel7810, very nice the way she wrote SS character is amazing and not OOC also has a decent plot.

#sasusaku fanfic #sasusaku

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boxwinebaddie · 8 months

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uncle nina! what are your favorite scenes from your book?^^ ( my personal fav was the marj chapter + the kyle trials ouo )

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA when you guys call pep a book it is so cute to me!!!!!! i love you!!!!! i always thought it was kind of silly to call pep a book because wdym, it's just my ao3 fanfic....that is...currently...170k...help oh my GOD!!!!! my dear friend actually informed me that if pep was a book it would be roughly 650+ pages long and could easily be two books...and it's not even done! so i am glad you are enjoying your novel, if you are!

okay, those are strong contenders! for me personally...

i know we are supposed to propel the story forward buuuuut...

if i am honest, my favorite scenes from pep are the flashbacks.

i just feel like they help you understand current pep stan!kyle so much more than if i just wrote the entire thing in present tense with no flashbacks...like it would just fall flat and be confusing! i like the dimension they add! also it really helps you understand each boy as an individual and how their relationship looks like as a unit.

okay...my personal favorite flashback though...probably that one in the middle of 13 where i talk about stan's bipolar episodes, how he swings really far up into self destructive manic binge drinking thrill seeking invincible party boy benders and then slips down into really gnarly can't move, can't speak, can't do anything but cry and rot depressive episodes...that felt important to portray to me. it is also extremely important to stans character and how he's extroverted externally but introverted internally. ( im also a bipolar girlie hi twin! )

my favorite part of that specific flashback is when kyle starts reading books to him, is just really patient and kind towards him, still thinks he is the most beautiful person in the world i'm aaaaa...also when they sign each other messages into each others skin and kyle types ily srwm into stan's shoulder ( also them being like crybaby!!! fuckwad!!!! theyre so cute ) I LOVE THAT FLASHBACK AAAAA

ok other than that ALL THE KINDERGARTEN ONES!!!!!!! i fucking LOVE those!!! like that is a really weird answer, but i genuinely think its so fucking cute that like stan was the boy everyone wanted to talk to be friends with like beloved by everyone and saw mean ass jersey ass kyle broflovski who almost murdered him with a library book and fucking hated his guts and was like please please please kiss me and be my special friend and just wore him down until kyle was like fine we can be friends and then accidentally fell in love with him skhdlksad ALSO JUST LIKE FERAL WILD ANIMAL RABID KYLE IS SOOOOOO FUNNY TO ME!!!! and stan is just like wow pretty <3

if i had more space...i would write more flashbacks of stan/kyle from like elementary to early hs...because elementary school really shows u the candid and cute wholesome nature of their friendship and how long theyve literally been like attached at the hip and in love....middle school is like where that burgeoning romantic physical attraction starts to show up and its awkward and uncomfy and hs is like...pinning suffering hell...

anyways holla at me if u want more flashbacks of any kind i fkn love them!!! i like them bc when the boys are fighting its my way of being like hi friends all is not lost the boys are fighting but like their love literally stands the test of time and here are like multiple examples of that shdklahda help

OH AND THE ROOFTOP FLASHBACK!!!!!! where stan is like i want to disappear and destroy randy marshs name and kill his bloodline and move to an unknown forest town and be a verternarian and go to the farmers market and no one would ever TOUCH me again!!! CRYING

ok last thing...yeah....the stan character studies. i love writing those like he is so fucking fascinating!!!! i like doing really long descriptions of the characters and how they look and act, how they feel, etc. thats why pep is so long because i love detail. ( i want to write more kyle ones because i feel like i know stan in my bones so can talk for hours but i am such a kyle girlie i want to talk abt him and gerald and shelia and ike and his Own pressure to preform and AAAAAAA )

SO LONG STORY SHORT....the flashbacks

( specifically the kyle reading to stan when hes depressed one,

the kindergarten flashbacks - specifically the one in five where kyle is like leave me alone giant eyed freak and then is like uhoh wait ur giant eyeballs are so beautiful my hands are clammy what is happening to me beepboopbeepboop malfunction

and the rooftop one where crunchy ass cottage core stan tells kyle his dream in life is to be nobody and live in cottage and go to the farmers market and be doc mcstuffins...beautiful... )

-uncle nina ( thanks for coming to my tedtalk )

#faq #mun centric #i love so much of pep but like idk those little moments are really precious to me #especially the really wholesome ones where u can just tell they are soul mates ughhhhhh #i also love when they bicker its so fucking funny to me

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thejugheadparadox · 3 years

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ok i talked abt rossetti + elizabeth siddal’s self portrait as part of my art history final 2 years ago and i am dying to know about christina. please

CHRISTINA ROSSETTI!!! i honestly barely knew anything about the portrait before seeing that post i would love to know more. i am so fascinated by christina georgina rossetti born 1830 died 1894, so she’s like ridiculously quintessentially victorian, she basically never knew another monarch. when she was a child she was angry and had a lot of tantrums, her and her brother the painter one dante gabriel were know as the two storms whilst their others siblings maria and william were known as the two calms (suuch classic irritating twee victorian fake middle class art family shit but i find it faintly endearing). she dropped out of school at the age of 14 due to a religious breakdown, and never went back. during and after that she was really fixated on christianity especially anglo-catholicism and its very specific doctrines. she was REALLY into it in a way the rest of her family werent (except her sister who became a nun i guess). she’d been writing poetry since she was very young, cus she’s from this eccentric art dynasty they played writing games as kids and shit - her maternal uncle was john william polidori who wrote the first published vampire story and was lord byrons doctor if that rings any bells? that relation specifically is sooo interesting to me bc its about legacy and who you are remembered as and whether youre noticed and also maybe youre gay? yk. i love it.

ANYWAYS. she was so into religion that it stopped her getting married twice. she was engaged to the prb painter james collinson for a bit but broke it off bc he reverted to roman catholicism and she couldnt be doing w that shit. she later got engaged to charles cayley and also broke that off for religious reasons! Or At Least Thats What They Say. she also turned down a possible proposal (ppl dont know if he proposed and the whole affair is a guess) from john brett, which she wrote a fun mean poem about called no thank you john. anyway she never married and she pursued lots of Things but none of them really went anywhere, she wanted to be a nurse w florence nightingale in the crimean war but got rejected, she worked with “fallen women” in her 30s and 40s. shes not one of those tragic figures who never knew fame while they were alive tho, she was pretty successful and released multiple collections. she was publicly antifeminist and declined to sign petitions in support of womens suffrage but wrote this one unpublished poem called from the antique that explicitly expresses her dissatisfaction with her limited life as a woman.

she got ill lots, as is classic for old timey lady poets, like emily dickinson style. she got depressed lots and after her dad died her family didnt have much money. she wrote a lot about inadequacy, as a woman and as a person and most often as a servant of god (every fucking poem ends up about jesus i swear to god it gets annoying). her brother was more successful and her sister was more devout and she never seemed to get the things she wanted and she never really had any friends, especially female ones. almost every time she was published, it was by her brother, william michael, who also published her works en masse after she died, and we have explicit sources showing both her brothers would tell her not to publish poetry they deemed out of character or unwomanly. i dont mean to entirely demonise them as the Bad Guys of the story but i find it very.... interesting that when u look at her poetry that is available but not officially published there are both feminist poems and a couple of pieces that coiuld be interpreted as love poems towards women. there are (admittedly pretty unfounded as far as i can tell) theories that even more of them existed and were destroyed, but i should say we DO know that there are missing poems and destroyed scraps that pique ones interest i will say!

ive read her collected family letters and what stood out to me is HOW ridiculously fucking boring they are. i think theyre hiding something.. i am fascinated by all of it. she interests me. i have some kind of parasocial relationship with her and i feel like her work is SO easy to translate to modern day and what ppl our age are writing about like she wrote what is essentially lonely notes app poetry about religious guilt and sexual repression and hating herself like. god i sound like those ppl who say dantes inferno is fanfic but i think about it a lot and i think about her a lot and i would recommend a lot of her poetry... if anyone wants specific recs do ask. to me its a story about hiding and repression and wanting to be good. jesus christ okay u did not ask for this but youre getting it. you made me start thinking about her again this is on you.

#yeah i am sorry about THIS my god #ask #thorinlesbian #christina rossetti

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