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alchemania · 6 months

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Drowning.

(Emotions are overwhelming, sometimes too hard to traverse alone. Thankfully, she doesn't have to.)

“I'm accusing you of not being the Hydro Archon at all.”

Those words freeze her where she stands, and whispers fly throughout the courtroom, like vultures searching for a carcass. Wait, no. Nonononono. This could not be happening. No one was supposed to discover her, she had to fulfill the prophecy or everybody would die and all of this would be for nothing and– the glares from all around and the distrust freeze her in her tracks, and Furina can't breathe, breath catching in her throat so hard she chokes. “Wait! Wait!” she cried, shaking her head frantically. “Don't listen to what he's saying! I- I am the Hydro Archon I swear! I'm real! I'M REAL!!”

She had to be. She could be nothing else, or all was lost, all was for naught. She could not allow that to happen she WOULD NOT allow it to happen. There had to be a way, there must be some way…the water! Yes! She's moving her hands rapidly as she talks now, attempting to get away from the spider's web that entangled her further and further. Put your hand in the water, Furina, they said, and she did, she did, deadly determined to keep up the facade, to live out the role. But that was ultimately what undid her- the water, diluted as it was, would not kill her, but she exhibited the same symptoms as the diver boy- Freminet, was his name (he would be dead soon as well oh god. Oh god. And she knew he had only wanted to help, they all did, but they did not know that in doing so, they'd doomed themselves..)

“On the charges of impersonating the Hydro Archon, Furina-”

“No! No!” she screamed, tears flowing like a river. “Stop! STOP!!! You don't understand, none of you understand please Neuvillette LISTEN TO ME -” There was so much pain in his eyes, she noticed, so much turmoil. But he uttered the damning words, regardless.

“..is guilty.”

Guilty.

That verdict stopped her heart, and Furina stumbled back and crumpled into her chair, looking like one dead. At the eleventh hour, she'd stumbled. Five hundred years of lies and guilt all for them, all to save them, down the drain. It was for nothing. SHE was for nothing. What was the point of it all..?

“All this time, she lied to us?! But why?”

To save you, I had no other choice. But it doesn't matter now, anyway. The flood is going to come.

All of a sudden, a terrible shaking rocked the entire courthouse, and an otherworldly being, resembling some sort of whale, seemed to swim through the building, sucking in horrified onlookers. People screamed and pushed each other in a mad dash to the exit, and somehow, Furina felt her legs carrying her as well, running outside along with the crowd. Her worst fears were already coming into being - the unforgiving waves were rising higher and higher, and folks were scrambling - to rooftops, to the trees, wherever they could go to get away. Furina watched numbly, being unforgivingly bumped into and shoved aside as her people fled for any hope of safety.

It was gut wrenching, also seeing humanity shine through in these moments - someone helping an older lady through the streets so she didn't fall, a little boy picking up a frightened cat so it wouldn't be run over and tearing through the streets like the angels themselves guided his footsteps. But it would not be enough. Even so, she ran, splashing up puddles as her heels made contact with the ground again and again and again and again. “Get to higher ground!” Furina screamed, helping a young lady onto a rooftop. “Don't stop moving!”

The hands of disaster would not be held back, though, and as the people climbed higher and higher, some of them began to slip and fall- wives screamed and cried for their husbands, parents for their children, children for their parents, friends for their companions, and she could do nothing but watch it all happen, hopes and dreams dissolving just like her entire nation. “No, no no!!! Please! Stop!”

“Help us!!” People screamed, and she could not. There was nothing she could do. She was helpless, her hands were tied, and all she could do was watch. Lyney and Lynette held Freminet near to them as the waters rose, heads bowed in solemn acceptance of what was to come, and the boy sobbed, dreading the inevitable.

“It's alright,” Lyney comforted. “It's alright. You're gonna see your mother soon, you'll be together again, and we'll see our parents too- and - and we'll never be apart anymore. It'll all be okay.”

“I don't want to die!” Freminet wailed, and Lynette shook like a leaf, fear taking hold.

“.. I don't either. But, we'll embrace it hand in hand, okay??”

“Mhm.”

“I love you guys.”

“I love you too.”

The waters consumed them soon, and Furina couldn't breathe. They were gone. They were gone.

The next thing she knows, she's atop the highest building in Fontaine, and the waters lap at her feet, a silent but deadly testimony to all that had happened. She was all alone now…. everyone was dead and it- it was all her fault. Hollowly, Furina looked to the water, sobbing and crumpling to her knees. The water had changed - it was just normal seawater now, and she found herself frantically pawing in it, inconsolable. “Give them back! Give them back to me!!! I'll do anything I swear - I'll take their place, I - please!!! They didn't do anything wrong it's not their fault it's mine! IT'S MINE!!!!!"

Her reflection changed, and Focalors stared back. Furina yelped, scuttling back like a surprised crab, and sniffled. “Furina. Come here,” she called, and there was no anger in her voice, only sorrow. When the girl approached, the goddess looked ready to weep. “What have you done?” she breathed, horror marring her face.

“I- I didn't mean to, they- they found me out,” she stammered, “I-”

“You were so close,” Focalors mourned. “But it was all for nothing.”

“I'm sorry. I'm so sorry,” Furina wailed, and the goddess sighed. “Please, I'll do anything - I don't care what happens to me -"

“There is nothing more you can do. You failed the task that you were given, and all is lost. I see now it was a mistake to trust in you.”

Furina's pupils shrank about three sizes, and she choked on air, shaking like a leaf. “I'm - a mistake?”

“Yes, Furina. You are a mistake. But it's alright, because I created you, and so the blame falls to me.”

“I- you - I had to suffer all this time, for nothing,” she wept, anger weaving its way into her veins, “You have no idea what I've been through! You don't - you could never know! It's your fault I had to go through all this! How- how dare you call me a mistake!!” Breaths ragged, Furina splashed the water furiously, again and again and again. “I'm NOT a mistake I'm NOT! TAKE IT BACK! TAKE IT BACK!! You said I was special!! You created me because you wanted me to live the way you couldn't!!! You created me because you BELIEVED in me!! WAS THAT A LIE, FOCALORS?! WAS ANYTHING REAL!?”

The reflection changed back to herself, and Furina was left alone with no answers. A beat passed, and the girl yanked off her hat and threw it into the water as hard as she could, screeching. Off came her coat, and her gloves, and she hurled them into the waves as well, screaming and crying at the top of her lungs. And Furina cried. She cried for all her people, and for all the pain she'd been shouldering, she cried for the pointlessness of it all, she cried because she was angry, she cried because she was tired, she cried because she was sad. And when she could cry no more, she hollowly stared at the waves, the waves that had doomed so many unfairly to a watery end. If she had just held on a little longer, if she had just kept up the act for a while more…..all would have been well. If she had been stronger, then..maybe..maybe-

“I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.”

Someone was calling her, and she curled into herself, wrapping her arms around her person.

“Furina,” the voice called again, and she looked up with red rimmed eyes to the heavens, chest heaving.

“No, not up there. Listen. Wake up. You have to wake up.”

“..what are you talking about..? The prophecy-- it's already come to pass it doesn't matter anymore -"

“Furina.”

She looked to the water again, and Tetsuya's face replaced her reflection, to her shock. “Wake up,” he commanded. “Wake up!” The image then sprang from the water, stopping her heart from fear as it grabbed her by the shoulders.

“Wake up!!”

Furina screamed raggedly, nearly tumbling out of bed, and Wanderer was right there, grabbing her face in both his hands. “Hey, hey!! It's alright! It's alright!”

“They're all gone,” the girl wailed, inconsolable, and he stared in bewilderment, face twisting almost comically in confusion.

“..huh?”

“Everyone- I failed, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry please please you have to help me please - there has to be something we can do-” she can barely breathe around her sobs, and Wanderer shakes his head, slowly.

“No. No you didn't, Furina, listen. It was a dream. You were having a nightmare of what could have been.”

“Everyone is-”

“Alive, yes.”

“I'm not- a mistake?”

“....uh, excuse me?” Tetsuya asked after a beat of disbelief, expression darkening like a storm cloud had taken residence. “No…Who the hell told you that?”

“She- she said -”

“She's wrong, whoever she is,” he interrupted, and Furina sobbed, tears streaming down her cheeks. “Furina. I need you to breathe.” He took her hand then and squeezed, frowning. “Come on. In through your nose, out through your mouth.” The girl coughed harshly, sucking in irregular breaths, and after a moment of hesitation, Wanderer took Furina's hand and placed it on top of his stomach, breathing calmly. “Can you follow that?”

“M- mhm,” she managed, taking in a shaky but steadier breath, and the rise and fall of Tetsuya's abdomen guided her through the motions, slowly steadying.

“Good, good,” he nodded, as her breathing evened out. “..do you need anything?”

“Can- can you h- hold me?? Please?”

“Ah- alright,” he relented, and Furina leaned on his shoulder, sniffling roughly. “..do you want to talk about it.”

“..no…”

“Okay. Then we'll just sit here.”

And they did just that, silence only broken by the girl's quiet sobs.

“..what if everything went wrong??”

“The important thing is that it didn't. What you need to focus on right now is what you're going to do now that everything is over. It wasn't all for nothing.” He glared at her, then, but she could tell his anger was not with her. “And even if everything had gone to hell, you would not have been for nothing. Don't you let anyone tell you otherwise, not even yourself.”

“..okay..okay. .. Tetsuya?”

“Mm.”

“... I don't think I'm okay.”

He gave a bitter, hearty laugh at that. “I don't think anyone expects you to be, Furina.”

“M’sorry if-”

“If what? You were a bother? You woke me up? If I didn't care, I wouldn't be here,” Tetsuya asserted, holding her closer. “Don't you remember what you said? Emotions are a burden, never the person who carries them. And when you care about people, you carry them too.”

“You remember what I said…?”

“I remember many things. More than I would like to. Important thing is, you're not okay right now, and quite frankly I'm terrible at comfort and all that. But I can promise I can kill whatever gives you hell. I'll be here when you need me, and if you wanna cry, well. To hell with it. After everything you've been through, I think you kinda earned it.”

“Okay. Thank you…”

"Mm.”

“... I wish I could hear her.”

“What?”

“Focalors. She's not here anymore, but I wish- she could've told me she was proud of me. That I did good. That - I was strong, and. . I did my best.”

“Well, I'm not her. But I think you did a hell of a job,” Wanderer muttered. “Sometimes you have to be your own closure and accept that the people you need most will not be by your side. I would know. And- if nobody else, you tell yourself.”

“I.. I did good,” Furina whispered, tears falling fast, and Tetsuya nodded, rubbing her shoulder to soothe. “It hurt a lot.”

“It did, but the worst of it is over. And you are going to get better.”

“I'm gonna get better. I'm gonna heal.”

“And you're not gonna put yourself down when you have setbacks.”

“. .I'll try.”

“Sometimes that's all you can do.”

“Mhm.” She looked up then, eyes misty. “Hey.”

“What.”

“I love you,” Furina smiled wetly, and Tetsuya blinked twice, eyes also a little glossy.

"..uh huh," he mumbled. "Love you too.”

“..What?????”

“I'm not going to say it again,” he huffed, looking fit to blush, and she squeezed him hard, laughing delightedly.

“You love me, you love me!!!”

"Yeah, yeah, you wormed your way into my heart and I can't find it in me to kick you out. Is that you want me to say??"

"Yes," she grinned, and Tetsuya sucked his teeth.

"I'm in your corner. That's the best you're gonna get right now."

She leaned her head back on his shoulder, and Wanderer sighed, looking affectionately weary. "Geez...... I'm getting soft."

"Is that bad?"

"..well. Not as much as I thought it would be."

Sometimes, life was still hell. But at least she had someone to walk through the fire with her now.

#furina #wanderer #genshin impact #oh baby oh BABY #i think so much about what furina has been through and no way she does NOT have nightmares #just. constantly overthinks about what could have been better and everything that went wrong and tears herself up #it is A LOT #thankfully wanderer is here to help wahoo #as you already know i really like these two i hope they meet i hope they hug i hope they get to heal #it's so funny furina has already been through so much and im here like MORE ANGST MORE ANGST #originally i was gonna have her nightmare be even darker but i was like nawwww.....lemme not do that...#but anyway!! i hope you enjoy this i am actually proud of this ome #4.2 spoilers #I ALMOST FORGOT TO TAG AGAIN LORD HELP ME. SORRY ABOUT THAT

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cephalopodish · 4 months

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qi rong's design might not be great but it does look like he's trying too hard to be edgy/cool and there is nothing more qi rong than that

#tgcf #qi rong #it is a Lot

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thatbuggygirl · 1 year

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I think a lot about how formative Gravitation was for me.

At the time I started reading it, a good eighteen years or so, I was not only beginning to understand things about my own sexuality, but I was also really, really into soppy, mushy, lovey-dovey romance stories.

And Gravitation...is anything but that kind of story.

Reading it for the first time was super frustrating for me, because I just wanted those idiots to be lovey and have a happy ending, dammit! I wanted it to be romantic! And as a young adult, I couldn't fully appreciate how absolutely romantic it is.

But, like, it opened my eyes to a different kind of love story, where everything isn't all hunky-dory and obstacles aren't easily overcome. There is so much to unpack in this series; all the characters have so many issues. Yuki's mental health and past trauma are uncomfortable topics, but not ones that are glossed over. He doesn't fall in love and magically get cured of his problems -- but also, he kind of does. And Shuichi doesn't get the sappy relationship he wants, but he gets something meaningful and...more. Under all the ridiculous circumstances happening around and because of them, these two young men manage to grow and change and strengthen each other.

And as much of a train wreck as the series is, I think it's beautiful, too. It's so raw and painful; so uncomfy. But I've learned that those uncomfortable moments, that make you feel things that aren't warm and fuzzy and might be difficult...That's just life. Real romance can be hard or a struggle. It may make you cry or get angry or leave you feeling hopeless. But it builds you up, too. It strengthens you. That's what I think this series is all about.

And it just...changed the way I think about love stories. It changed the way I write love stories.

It might sound stupid, but Gravitation changed me.

#gravitation #this series means so much to me #it is A LOT #but i love it #buggy thoughts

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mishapen-dear · 2 months

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The fucking TALENT ??? the SKILL??? im always blown away every movie night but still holy fucking shit. How do people make such gorgeous animatics. The Power and the PATIENCE of each of these artists.. fuckin incredible

#qsmp #MULTI COLOURS???#ALL THOSE FRAMES???#LIGHTING????#THE CAMERA MOVEMENTS????#trying to make my own animatics just makes me appreciate more how much work is being showcased today #it is A Lot #certain programs may make it easier but its still herculean whats goin on here man

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thewolfisawake · 4 months

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So this ended a rough timeline of meeting generals and major plays to take the throne by Balmoral:

Childhood: Balmoral, then called Snowdrop, had been brought to the brothel that Solanine, then called Belladonna, had been for a while. Because of nature of the brothel, older courtesans are like 'big sisters' to the younger. She and Balmoral were not close but they were on friendly terms.

Childhood: After escape and semi-established in the Citadel, Balmoral had traveled via caravans to explore the Unseelie and would've come across Norval in his service to his merchant master. This would be passing meetings considering the transience of caravans

Early Adolescence: Balmoral had managed to pester to some witches to take him on for learning magic. It was during this stint that he first encountered Somairle. Balmoral is a bit older than Somairle, who was brought to get his powers under control.

Early Militia / Early Adolescence: Balmoral joins the militia--formally addressing himself as Balmoral--and begins currying favor to get unusual or higher assignments, no matter how mundane or terrible. He is put on duty to investigate the wake of a massacre. There he encounters the perpetrator and only survivor: Mhoirbheinn.

Early Militia / Mid Adolescence: Balmoral serves as a guard to watch Mhoirbheinn until his execution date. They build a rapport but part when it is expected Mhoirbheinn to be executed soon. Due to a change in regime, Mhoirbheinn is quietly released. He seeks out Balmoral and they begin their friendship. Later becoming lovers. This marks Mhoirbheinn as the first formally recruited of who would be Balmoral's generals.

Early / Mid Militia (Mid Adolescence): Balmoral and Mhoirbheinn infiltrate a trafficking ring that had been stealing fae from their ranks. This was their first major encounter with anyone from Balmoral's list of those was to execute. This is also where they came into possession into a lot of capital that they stole from auctioneer and buyers that they killed in the process.

Early / Mid Militia (Mid/Late Adolescence): Balmoral first ingratiates himself to the gentry of the Unseelie. Furthering Somairle's interest and first gaining Risteard's attention.

Early / Mid Militia (Late Adolescence): Solanine had heard about rising prominence and by chance got to physically see Balmoral to recognize him. In exchange for her silence of his history and a 'favor' from her, Balmoral aids Solanine in her quest to regain her family's debt collections business. This culminates in her murder of her sister to gain control, which she had Balmoral sworn to secrecy. His aid and trading in his favor brings Solanine into his fold.

Early / Mid Militia (Late Adolescence / Young Adult): Balmoral ends his charade with his commander. He challenges him to a duel with the commander's rank on the line. Expecting Balmoral to only be capable of bedding for power, this commander agrees. Balmoral gains ranks since his commander is honor bound.

Mid Militia (Late Adolescence / Young Adult): Balmoral takes a decent amount of the capital that he and Mhoirbheinn hid to invest in what would eventually be Corpsevain Run. This led to an encounter with Norval, who was surprised by Bal's heavy upfront investment. He senses Balmoral knows something he is not seeing and thus invests as well.

Mid Militia (Young Adult): Balmoral searches for a lost soldier in his unit. He discovers them dead and meets their killer, Siubhan. Caring more of his number than whom fills it, wagers with her to take the place of the soldier she killed if he wins a duel against her. Siubhan initially seems to renege on the deal, cursing Bal's hand in the process. Bound to her word, she returns to serve and undoes the curse.

Mid Militia (Young Adult): Balmoral engages the nobility as he needs to get their and the king's rapport if he hopes to further himself. This leads to his initial clashes with Risteard. He also uses his connection with Somairle to get an understanding of the gentry, including and unbeknownst to Risteard.

Mid Militia (Young Adult): Balmoral orchestrates the downfall of a another of those on his list by stoking their idea to have their settlement to secede. This sparks the Unification campaign.

Mid Militia (Young Adult): The Battle at Demilune Spring occurs, breaking Siubhan's trust in Balmoral. By his persuasion and promise of his possible death if he failed, Siubhan goes on to lead a successful counterattack.

Mid Militia (Young Adult): The execution of another perpetrator of Faolan's demise and major traitor to the crown completes the Unification Campaign. This feat gains Balmoral status as general.

Mid Militia / Early Rebellion (Adult): Balmoral uses the Unification Campaign and the shift of rule to start his plans for actual gain of the crown. The gentry, shifting the idle Unseelie, and the strain of supporting his supporters are all factors he considers now.

Mid Militia / Early Rebellion: Balmoral runs into a block with Siubhan on the militia front and Risteard on the gentry front and realizes he has to figure out how to either gain their trust or eliminate them altogether. Siubhan doesn't care about Balmoral's overall goals but would not support him if he cannot support the weight of their forces without the crown's aid.

Early Rebellion: Balmoral seeks out either Dagda's Cauldron or the Hamper of Gwyddno Garanhir. This leads to the encounter with Merlin and Morgan le Fay. He agrees to take on their daughter, Morgan, in exchange for the hamper. As fellow clairvoyants, they were aware Balmoral had potential for something great which is why they sent Morgan with him. Morgan comes to his fold rather easily from this.

Late Militia / Early-Mid Rebellion: Balmoral finds out from Somairle of a betrayal that is going to befall Risteard. He warns Ristead of this with proof. Risteard cedes defeat, bringing him to become a general. Risteard covers the gentry to keep their focus away from the militia and help certain rulings go by.

Late Militia / Mid Rebellion: Balmoral secured land for a base because of 'rezoning' Risteard did that had land technically owned but not cared for nor desirable was taken off mapping. The hamper was used to create food and an accompanying horn dealt with drink. Capital from the expanding and lucrative Corpsevain provides funding for about anything else. After a fight and a very long talk, Siubhan is on board with his plan bringing her in.

Late Militia / Mid Rebellion: Balmoral severs a good portion of the militia from the Unseelie. He makes the declaration that he will either take the crown or they will have his head. This begins the Rising Dusk Campaign.

Mid Rebellion: Balmoral needs to stir the general Unseelie populace from being bystanders in the conflict. For this he looks towards the 'Echo of the Unsung,' a writer whose topics and way with words resonates with them. Investigation carried out by Mhoirbheinn and Solanine brings the conclusion of Norval being this writer. Under threat and able to tell a juicy story when he sees one, Norval agrees to help Balmoral's campaign gain traction.

Late Rebellion: Settlements splinter into whom they are in favor of. Balmoral opts to support any settlements that are in his favor as well as help settlements in conflict over which. Only when he has, essentially, unified the settlements again does he decide to deal with the Citadel, the last stronghold of the ruler.

Late Rebellion: Most if not all gentry threw their hand with the ruler. Both Somairle and Risteard cut their ties with their family to evacuate the castle before the conclusion of the the Rising Dusk Campaign.

Late Rebellion: The Invasion of Dun Foghar occurs, where the royal palace is infiltrated through the bottom that is only guarded by the Abyss. All against the usurpation was eliminated in this battle. Balmoral went and killed the ruler, the final person on his hit list. However he may have let others escape in pursuit of this target. With the death of the previous ruler and all opposition dealt with, the Rising Dusk Campaign concludes.

#long post #{The Unseelie}#y'all #I found out there's a text limit on posts #oh my god this was not the intention #but not noted here is Mhoirbheinn gets a bit jealous #that Solanine knew Bal when he was younger #also a lot of stuff seems to ram together #but keep in mind they are fae #so they live a long time and this is likely decades or even centuries #but at the same time #it is a lot #within a span of one part of a fae's life time #it's why Bal like #never feels bored or always on the go #because it's been busy for so long #honestly the crown is the first time it's been a little slow

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nastiiuu · 2 years

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Me when I when Life when I me when- yes.

#nasti stuff #i have been doing much art #and life #and family time #it is a lot #mhm mhm

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anthro-cat · 2 months

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you do not know the joy i feel when i find another furry in roblox

#it is a lot #my rambles

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okami-zero · 7 months

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FINALLY have upgraded my phone and aside from getting it back to being my comfy electronic sidekick again, it is interesting. Especially the battery life, but my old LG was...at LEAST four years old, if not five, so we were due. Had to do a plan upgrade, but we had been thinking about that for ages.

Also had two bits of really not great news yesterday, and while it hasn't really sunk in for me, I need to be there for the folks who have.

#okami rambles #so i was already kind of stressed with all the changes at work #and another change in fiscal responsibilities this weekend #and then Sunday afternoon and night happened and...#it is a LOT #i am nothing if not resilient #but i hope shit evens out soon

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morningstargirl666 · 5 months

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oh wow oh wow oh wow. I just read TBBW and the other wolfblood stories and I am absolutely 100% blown away. your writing and world building is absolutely incredible and your mastery of each character and their relationships is something to be admired. like holy shit. one of my favorite parts is how you developed the werewolf lore so much -- I always thought they could do SO much better (and you did!!). ((also also I absolutely LOVE sam as a character, he's amazing and I love his interactions with everybody)) but question for you: how do (some) werewolves consider the curse a gift if the trigger is killing someone (in canon at least)? I can't recall if that was the only way to trigger it in TBBW or not. but ty for sharing your story! <3

omg omg HI!!!

First of all, thank you so much for all the nice words! Absolutely love that you have enjoyed my self-indulgent crusade against canon lmao 😂 I feel very honoured! Love you so much ✨❤️

And your question! Funnily enough, this is going to be explored in more depth in the editing I've been doing to The Little Wolf...it's uh...not 11k anymore. [nervous laugher] More like...30k? Once I've finished it, I'll re-post, so watch out for that update.

ANYWAY as for my lore around the werewolf curse, I've had it in my head for a long time (hence me laying the groundwork in for TBBW, how it's gift, not a curse etc). There's a LOT to it, so let me try and explain in a coherent way:

So. First, the way the wolf is triggered is slightly different than canon. In my head, all that werewolf backstory (that came in I think in The Originals but don't quote me on that) where a witch cursed people to turn on a full moon after they themselves had killed someone, creating the werewolf species - is bullshit. That did not happen here. In TBBW and its related stories, werewolves evolved. Whether they started off as witches who meddled in shapeshifting magics, or simply evolved as an adjacent species to the human race I'll leave unclear (i feel that werewolves probably tell their children legends of how werewolves came first, man and wolves evolving from them lol, like their little own creation story). And like the scientific theory of evolution, werewolf packs have different traits/attributes because they reproduced with certain gene pools. Some are stronger, some are faster, some - like Lycaon and Klaus, werewolves from North America and Scandinavia (because the continents used to be joined, especially during the ice ages I think) - are larger, like Dire Wolves.

Now, my theory is, like I said, is that lycanthropy isn't a curse. It's sorta like a defence mechanism? So strong emotions of fear, anger, panic, anything that comes with trauma or what ignites that fight/flight instinct, coming of age even - that's what triggers it, what awakens the wolf and brings it forth and any death that happens because of that anger is merely a consequence, not a cause. Now obviously, hundreds of years ago, people didn't have an understanding of mental health or the idea of trauma, not really. I mean shellshock was a term more broadly used after the World Wars, which is barely 100 years ago. So, werewolves wouldn't have seen this scientific/logical reasoning behind it.

However, they also didn't believe it was merely taking a life that caused it. That reasoning, came from fear, people like Mikael who feared werewolves because of their power and strength. It's basically propaganda from the winning side of the feud between supernatural species. Like you said, werewolves believe it to be a gift. Perhaps even, a gift from the gods themselves.

In The Little Wolf it's going to be explained that they believe Death demands a sacrifice, but Death also doesn't care how that sacrifice is given. Yes, you can awaken the wolf if you kill a man. But you also awaken the wolf if you watch a family member die in front of you, grieving their loss. Furthermore, I always thought you also have to consider how killing someone a thousand years ago wasn't a horror or crime it is now. People killed to survive, to defend their families, even to prove their worth. I'm not talking about cold-blooded murder, but killing as warriors. Most cultures it was probably even an act of coming of age.

Here's a snippet from the The Little Wolf that probably explains it better, where young pack members are being initiated into Lycaon's pack:

The Alpha stared down at the young wolves, his eyes kind as he stood before them, assessing each of them in turn. “Will you answer their call tonight?” He asked; a question for them and them alone. A chorus of ‘Aye’ answered him, the young wolves keeping their heads bowed. The Alpha nodded and turned, gesturing for an elder wolf-woman to step forward, her face wrinkled by time. In one of her hands hung a cluster of necklaces, each unique to its owner, and in the other, a bowl of blood, drawn from every member of the pack. The first, a silver trinket forged from the metal of the enemy’s sword he had slain. The second and third, necklaces made of small bones from the animal they had killed on their first hunt alone. The fourth, made of wooden beads that used to decorate necklaces adorning her mother’s breast, a possession of a relative recently lost. Many feared the wolf-men because of the way their wolves woke, satisfied only by Death herself. But what was little known, was Death did not discriminate. She did not care either way, if the death you witnessed was dealt by your own hand or by the cruelty of fate. The Alpha himself had befallen such a trial, his wolf woken the day of his father’s death, taken by the floods of a great storm that had robbed his mother of her mate. Death was Death, a notion that transcended all languages and cultures, timeless in its power and prestige. Just as there was a Beginning, there had to be an End. And only through seeing death, did one truly understand the nature of life.

Does that make any sense? Lol there's a lot to it (and tbf there's probably more I'm forgetting to say). Klaus, despite Mikael's abuse, never triggered the wolf for reasons that will be explained in The Little Wolf.

Thanks so much again, I've had the shittiest day and your ask arriving in my inbox really brightened it. So thank you ✨

#the big bad wolf #asks #tbbw #klaroline fanfiction #klaroline #klaus x caroline #fanfiction #morningstar writes #the little wolf #werewolf lore #you know that meme where its like the tip of the iceberg and then there's the iceberg under the water #yeah think of that when you think about the werewolf lore #it is a LOT #sneak peak #you ask and I provide

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housemarcellus · 1 year

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#first fucking time in (honestly thankfully) a long ass time ive had a psoriatic arthritis flare up like this #it actually sucks extra tho bc a) im resensitized and no longer 'used to it' so it's a lil more distressing and #b) absolutely GLORIOUS timing considering we're having to care for my mom who just got knee replacement surgery and like #my husband is the only remotely able-bodied person in the house atm and hes just one person #im taking care of her med management and we have to wake her up at like 3-4 in the morning to try and stay ahead of her pain (ya can't)#oh an my period came at the same damn time and decided to act tf up again by being heavy/painful like it was last year #(surprisingly it's *also* been 'well behaved' for a lil while...)#ignore me #it's a lot #...lmfao and OH almost forgot #kids have off for midwinter break and bored and restless as FUCK lmfao #IT IS A LOT

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erigold13261 · 8 months

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hiiiii eri!! ✌️ hope youre having a good day/night with your pals and also sorry you gotta deal with weird ass anons, but dont let em get to you when youre just minding your business!

(also also no pressure to reply to this, just wanted to drop by! youre also pretty cool in my book and all the nice tags you leave in all the stuff you reblog are super lovely!!)

Omg, I saw the little T with a ? in my notification (meaning I got an ask) and thought it was either the hater anon or the persona wanting my Failed Revolution to be worse than it is, so seeing it was you was so nice.

And even more nice was what you said. Like, I live by the motto of spreading kindness, which is why I respect people with different headcanons or ideas from me. And also why I always try to say something nice in the tags of stuff I reblog (I should get into the habit of commenting too honestly lol).

Anyway, don't worry about that anon. One of these days I will screenshot and post all that they have said (with some funny commentary or analysis lol) but for now, them sending me hate actually fuels me lol.

The fact I am getting hate, at least to me, means that I made it as an artists. I am in someone else's mind and bothering them with just existing, which is so funny and nice to me lol. So they can keep trying to give me "advice" or whatever they see their asks as, but I will just see it as a win in my book (and a way to make my irl friend happy as they love making fun of people like that lol).

But you are right I shouldn't let this get to me. I do my best to be respectful. Even with asks I don't personally agree with, I try my best to validate that headcanon as best as possible. So like, that anon has some things to learn about respect or learning how to curate their own online experience.

Anyway, I am doing actually really good right now. I hope you are too! Thank you so much for your response! I won't lie, I was hoping for a little bit of validation with my posts before, but wasn't actually expecting any. Thank you again, you took time out of your day to send me a nice message and it makes the world for me. Even if that anon is being rude and disrespectful (even if they don't see it as such) they took time to keep me in their mind which makes me happy.

So you and that anon mean the world to me (you more because you are nice lol). So thanks. I do my best to make a welcoming environment. I know some people will see that as "woke" or stupid or whatever, but that just means it's not for them and they should look for their own space.

Anyway, I am tipsy/drunk and just want to say I appreciate anyone who sent in a nice comment or ask. Or had liked my stuff. Any interaction is a positive in my book honestly, as that means I meant something in someone's life (whether good or bad lol).

So yeah, I am doing good and hope you are too. This is way too rambly for such a small ask, but honestly I wanted to get this out. Thank you to you, and anyone really, who even just liked my stuff (reblogging, or reblogging with tags is also a love from me). It truly means a lot for people to take time out of their day for me, a stranger on the internet. Thank you so much!

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