#it’s like these friendships were built up only for it to have never been real

[jaylver]

WEBS OF HURT — S.JY

synopsis: Falling for your best friend wasn't on your check list for high school. As if that wasn't enough to break your heart, his odd behaviour only added fuel to the fire along with a new crush of his. Who knew that odd behaviour would soon turn into a secret truth that you'd discover after his valiant effort of hiding.

pairings: spiderman!jake x afab!reader

genre: best friends to lovers, unrequited love, miscommunications, spiderman au, angst, romance, fluff

warning(s): profanities, mentions of alcohol, party, violence, injury

wc: 10k

a/n: tried something new! a little birthday gift from me <3 please leave a feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated! muah xx

masterlist | © jaylver all rights reserved.

Falling in love with your guy best friend was probably the worst thing ever to experience when it came to girlhood.

High school should be fun, right? Being a teenager should be fun, right? Well, that wasn't exactly the case when you found yourself feeling more than just a mere liking towards Jake Sim, the guy best friend you mentioned and was entirely, love sickeningly, in love with. 

Jake Sim was the first guy you actually built a solid friendship with. It first started when he sat beside you in calculus, then you realised you had more classes with him and a friendship eventually developed when you started acknowledging each other. One class together soon turned into years spent with one another. You knew his family and he knew yours. Nothing could ever break the bond between you and him.

You just couldn't help but notice a slight change in him after the death of his uncle, Ben. At first, you figured it might've been grief, trying your best to offer your utmost support. But as months flew by, the oddness persisted. He would disappear in between classes, sometimes standing you up at places you were at together and returning a little scathed, making it up to you by promising for a redo hang out. All of that was weird. Let's not get started on the fact he caught your stuff falling way too many times, even when his head was faced away, his hand would reach out first. In his words, he called it his 'spidey sense', whatever that meant.

However, you never doubted him. He was still the best friend you had, even if he had some tweaks to him. You never once questioned him or brought up your suspicions, but this time, you couldn't help yourself from bombarding him with questions when he broke the news to you.

"I think I have a crush," Jake announced the moment he was in your presence, sounding a little out of breath considering he made a run to the cafeteria. The tray of food was untouched, quite unlike him since he always dug into his food first.

"You 'think'?" You hummed, ignoring the mixed feelings you had blaring loudly. 

"Okay, I know I have a crush," he has yet to start eating, just staring expectantly at you, eyebrows furrowed at the nonchalant and dismissiveness in your tone. 

"You're being for real?" You finally turned your head to meet his eyes, placing your fork down. 

"I am! I think it's kinda crazy," his eyes twinkled, something quite rare but only you knew, like a comet in the sky. 

"Who is it?"

"Gwen,"

"Gwen? Gwen Stacy?" You swallowed back a frown that was itching to make its way to your lips, masking it with your best shot of shock instead of disappointment. Of course it was the golden girl, what a cliche plot.

He nodded, a small smile rested on his face as he started digging into his food. "We … talked? Talked about some science things, about Oscorp, about the things she's working on. Oh yeah, she said there's this party on Saturday and wondered if I wanted to go, I said I wanted to bring a friend and she's cool with it,"

"I assume I'm that friend, then?" You poked at your food, suddenly losing your appetite as the conversation progressed.

"No, it's Carlos—of course it's you, dumbass," he flicked at your forehead, earning a firm scowl from you. "You're my best friend, my only ever, I'd be insane to think otherwise,"

You chewed at your lips, not because you were contemplating whether you should or shouldn't go, but it was mainly due to the word 'best friend' that got your attention. There goes your hope down the drain. First, being told your best friend who you have a crush on already has his eyes on someone else, then, getting friendzoned by that same exact guy, all in one shot. It's brutal out here.

"So what do you say?" Jake's voice broke the momentary silence, noticing your dazed expression. You snapped out of it almost immediately.

"I'll go,"

"Really?"

"Do you want me to say no instead …?" You raised an eyebrow, watching him scrambling at your words.

"N–no! I'm just shocked and very glad you agreed to come," he managed a laugh, which turned into a smile. 

"Am I going to get ditched that night because you want to get your dick wet?"

Jake scrunched his face up in a look of disgust. "Can you not? I don't need you to say that. And no, I'm not going to ditch you,"

"I'm holding you to it."

Jake shot you a wink, earning a figuratively loud eye roll from you. His laughter filled your ears, and though you managed a smile, you found yourself feeling the opposite internally. You knew you shouldn't feel this way, it's not like you were even in a relationship with him in the first place. But God, why did it hurt so bad?

Who told you friends to lovers was cool when it was unrequited and one sided all along.

"You know, you look good either way,"

Jake Sim was sitting on the edge of your bed watching you put on makeup and getting ready. It was a few hours before the party and Jake had turned up looking nervous, wearing that lucky graphic tee of his that you recognised quickly. Your teasing definitely didn't make him smile, and you soon realised that the crush he had was actually serious.

You glanced at him, raising an eyebrow despite feeling the giddiness from the effects of his nonchalant words. He has to stop that. "Are you trying to butter me up to get me to move quicker?"

"Whaaat? No way. You genuinely look good whether or not you have makeup on, seriously," he was genuine, you could tell, but you knew him better than anything. It was quite a fatal flaw.

"Give me ten minutes to finish the other eye then we can leave."

At that, Jake sighed in relief and fell back onto your bed, kicking his legs patiently. He couldn't stop talking about the party and the people who'd be there, but honestly, you could tell he was just trying to not bring up Gwen at any given moment. Knowing that, you wished the mascara wand would just poke into your eye, maybe it'd hurt less compared to how your heart felt.

"Does my shirt look lame—"

"Dude, shut up," just before you and Jake entered the house, he was asking for another reassurance. First, it was his hair, then his shoes, and every other piece of clothing, leaving his shirt for last. It took everything in you to not punch him along the way there. "I swear, no one will care. If anything, isn't that your lucky shirt?"

"It is my lucky shirt. But whether or not that lucky shirt looks good, that's the case," he glanced down at his graphic shirt, a picture of a rock band from the 2000s staring back at him.

"Trust me, if it's ugly, I would've asked you to change, now shut up and get your ass in there before I leave you here," you huffed and continued walking, hearing him mutter something before catching up with you. 

Upon entering the house, you figured it was as underwhelming as you expected. The smell of sweat and flavoured smoke filled the air, high school students lingered around as the music blasted. You should've probably stayed home.

"So, you got your pick up lines ready?" You thrusted a cup of fruit punch into his hands, tilting your head in question. 

Jake rolled his eyes. "I'm afraid Google has failed me on that one," he looked around the room, shoulders tense.

"Calm down, big guy. You're acting like you're being hunted down. She's not that scary," you patted his shoulders as he took a swig out of his cup.

"Not scary? Says the one without a crush,"

How ironic.

You brushed it off, finding yourself taking a big gulp as well. He was oblivious and you were just stupid. Stupidly in love with your best friend who has his eyes set on another girl. Perfect.

"I think I see her," you followed his line of sight, spotting a blonde in the midst of the crowd almost immediately. She made her way through, parting the mass with a certain grace to her aura. 

Jake looked back at you, a mix of conflict written in his features. You read him well, too well. You offered a smile. "Go, go talk to her. Just text me when you're leaving, okay? You said you're not going to ditch me,"

"I won't," he laughed, but there was a certainty in his tone. 

"Then go, what are you waiting for? I'm expecting a whole loads of information by the end of the night," you gave him a slight push, but you could see the small reluctance he had. "Go!" Off he went into the crowds and gravitated towards her. 

You couldn't bear to witness it all, watching him leaning down as she laughed into his ear. The feeling of bitter jealously coursed through your veins, it was evil, so evil, but you couldn't help it. At the end, you had to remind yourself, he wasn't yours in the first place. He wasn't yours to lose.

Turning your back to them, you sat alone in a stranger's kitchen and fought off the temptation of getting drunk. Instead, you indulged in the leftover pizzas left on the counter, letting a random girl join you and overshare secrets. Wallowing in self pity was probably not what you had in store for the night.

Almost as fast as you had arrived, it was already past midnight in a blink of an eye. You realised your curfew was around the corner and it was time to signal Jake to leave too. Glancing at your phone, you were surprised to see zero messages from your best friend. Weird.

You stepped out of the kitchen and into the living room, seeing a bunch of people passed out at the oddest spots, only a few still awake. One of them was surprisingly Gwen, the goody two shoes you had in mind was actually staying up past your curfew. You heaved a distressed yet exasperated sigh, walking towards her. 

"Hey, Gwen," you hoped she remembered you, considering you were in the same Chemistry class as her.

"Oh, hey. Y/N, right?" She flashed you a sweet smile, and it was painful to know how likeable and nice she was. You couldn't even bring yourself to hate her. 

"Right. Sorry for interrupting, but have you seen Jake around? The last time I saw him was with you," you unknowingly chewed on your bottom lip anxiously, taking the frown on her lips as a bad sign.

"He left," that was the least expected thing you anticipated as a response.

"He … left?" You repeated incredulously, almost as if she hadn't made it clear enough for you.

"Yeah, he suddenly said he needed to leave … in the middle of our conversation. An emergency or something. Kinda weird but kinda cute," she laughed, but you were holding back a disdainful scowl, reserved for both Jake and her, but most specifically Jake Sim. "Why? Were you with him?"

You bit back an immediate reply. As much as you wanted to say 'yes', you didn't want to blow off his chance either. "No, just … checking. He said he was coming tonight,"

"Oh, I see," 

"Yeah," you nodded rather stiffly and awkwardly. "I'll get going now, thanks,"

"See ya, Y/N. Until our next class," she gave you a salute, a melodious laugh escaping her lips.

You couldn't resist a smile either, saluting her back. There was a charm to her that affected people, it was understandable that Jake was charmed, but you hated to know that, and you did not want to understand it. For now, he was dead to you, just like how he has left you to yourself in the middle of a party at midnight. Was he Cinderella? Glad to know you weren't the only one who he pulled the disappearing act on. 

Clutching onto your jacket tight, you cursed every cuss words there were under your breath, all of which were dedicated to Jake. He had the audacity to leave without even leaving you a text, and that got you walking home in the dangerous night of New York City. Thanks a fucking lot. To say you were seething was an understatement.

You hated the streets of New York especially at night. To prove your hatred further, you just had to be at threat of an armed robbery there and then. 

"Hey! You there!" A dark figure approached from a distance, pointing at you. Oh God. "Got some money on you?" This couldn't be happening. 

"N–no," you said quietly, backing up quickly. His footsteps thundered loudly against the pavement, seemingly getting closer. 

"Don't lie, I see that purse on you,"

"I'm a broke high school student, leave me alone!" Was it sad to say that you were yelling the brutal truth to him?

"I don't care. Give me your purse—" his threat almost had you running in the opposite direction, but his sentence was never finished. Instead, a sharp unfamiliar noise shot through the silence, and a second figure in the distance appeared. That wasn't his partner, right?

Panic coursed through you, and yelling out was most likely the worst idea you had in ages. "Hello?" 

Silence. 

"Hello? Can I leave now?" 

"Yeah, you can," the figure walked under the lamp post, revealing himself. 

Spiderman? 

Clad in red and a mask over his head, he stepped towards you ever so casually, whereas you stood there absolutely stunned to even move. It wasn't an everyday occurance where you could personally meet the hero in flesh. The media might've painted him as some criminal, but to you and many other citizens, you knew that wasn't the truth.

"Spiderman," you greeted, anxiety lowered knowing you weren't getting robbed now. "Thanks for—that," you waved in the direction of where the man originally was.

"No worries," you noticed his voice seemed familiar, but before you could think more about it, he spoke with a sudden deeper octave. "It's—uh—not safe out here. What are you doing here anyway?"

"Well, for starters, my friend left me at a party that we were supposed to leave together without telling me, and now I'm walking home alone, until I almost got robbed," it was clear that anger and bitterness laced your voice, a deep frown etched on your face as you told Spiderman your concerns.

"Sorry," his voice became lighter, somehow sincere, which made you tilt your head in question. "I–I mean, sorry that he did that to you," he cleared his throat, straightening his spine and returning back to that deep voice. 

"I don't know what's up with him. He could've left me a text," 

He muttered something inaudible under his breath, then turned his focus back on you. "I'm sure he's very sorry, and maybe he's got a reason too. Try hearing him out,"

"I will. I always do. I'm just hurt, it's complicated," 

"What? What do you mean complicated?"

You shrugged, hugging your purse close to your chest. "It's nothing. I don't think Spiderman will be interested in my matters with my best friend. I'll leave you to your hero stuff and head home now. Thanks for saving me and the 20 dollars in my wallet,"

"Well—I—wait," before you could fully turn around and leave, his hand landed on your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks. "Let me walk you home. It's not safe,"

"Wouldn't it be weird if I turned up at my apartment lobby with Spiderman?" You crossed your arm, making quite a fair point. 

"You're right. What about I give you a swing?"

"What?"

Swinging around New York City was definitely an unforgettable but scary experience. You clung onto Spiderman, screaming like a madwoman as he had his arm wrapped around your waist. The touch was as familiar as his voice, hard to put a finger on but almost feeling like you've known him for years. 

You were about to point out your apartment but he had already beat you to it, not even needing you to tell you which floor or window it was, landing on the fire escape right in front of your bedroom window. That just further proved your familiarity towards him. 

He pulled your window open, signalling you to head in, but you were stuck staring at him, both in shock from the swing and the way he knew your place. 

"How did you—"

"Bye! Goodnight!"

You watched as he avoided your question and shot a web out to swing to some other building, leaving you stunned. How were you going to recover from this?

10/10 experience. Spiderman might just be your casual crush to get away from the thoughts of Jake. 

'BREAKING NEWS: bank robbery in downtown last night caused a chaotic and frantic disturbance, luckily, Spiderman was there to save the day and catch the robbers before anything major happened. Is he really as bad as they make him to be?'

The news of Spiderman saving a bank from a robbery right before your personal near robbery experience had you amused. The videos of him beating up the robbers and using his webs to tie them up were going viral all over the internet, even people in school were talking about it.

You were standing at your locker, digging for some textbooks before class started when Jake Sim himself appeared beside you. His presence was announced before he even spoke, but you didn't bother to spare him a glance.

"Y/N, I'm so so sorry about last night," he was heaving in breaths, as if he had ran across the school to find you, maybe he did.

"Oh, were you?" You clicked your tongue, suddenly finding the random piece of paper in your locker fascinating. 

"I am. Seriously, Y/N. I know I'm an asshole for that, I'm sorry for not texting you earlier and letting you know—"

"Jake, this isn't the first time you bailed on me," you cut him off, slamming your locker door close and turning to face him. The bruise beside his right eye caught your attention, and suddenly, your anger seemed to have sizzled away. "What the hell happened to your eye?"

It has become a common practice by now apparently. Jake disappearing and turning up with some kind of injury. Like always, he just brushed you off. "It's nothing, don't worry. It's not about me, it's about you. I fucked up this time and I know it, I'm sorry. An emergency with Aunt May came up a–and I had to go home early, I was too caught up in the moment to let you know. I'm sorry, really,"

You considered his apology for a moment. He was sincere, you knew that, but there was a certain dishonesty to his explanation. However, you didn't want to press on further either. "I understand. You probably always have a reason, it's just that I hate it when you disappear on me without telling me. I almost got robbed last night!"

It took him almost a few seconds to register, then another few more to compute a reaction. "What? Are you okay?"

"I'm standing here, aren't I? Spiderman saved my ass," 

"Spiderman?"

"Yeah, Spiderman. That guy who swings around New York. He saved me from some guy that was about rob me, because someone over here decided to leave early,"

"I'm sorry, okay? I'm just glad you're alright," 

"Well, thank fuck I am," you crossed your arms, staring pointedly at Jake. 

He dug something out of his backpack, a paper bag of some sort materialized in his hand. "I got you some of your favourite cookies and donuts. As a form of apology,"

You took the bag from him, glancing between him and it. "You can't just buy your way into an apology,"

"You accepted it, you took the bag," 

You rolled your eyes, unable to bite back. "Whatever," you reached in for a cookie and started walking away from your locker, hearing Jake scurrying to join your side.

"So, we're cool?"

You took a brief glance at him, taking a bite out of your cookie. "We are,"

Jake wasn't fully convinced, however. He knew you and your patterns, and he definitely knew which tricks to pull to make it better. "How about I treat you to some Chinese food tonight?"

That piqued your interest, an eyebrow raised at his question. "The one downtown?"

"That one,"

"You sure know how to get on my good side, Sim," you nudged his side, falling into one of his tricks once again. "Too well,"

"I know my ways to get to your heart, don't underestimate me," he said in a lighthearted tone, but God, you wished he would actually find his way into your heart. "Anyway, how was—uh—Spiderman, last night? Excusing your near robbery experience," he winced at the last part, though in reality, the accident hadn't shaken you as much as he had thought.

"He was nice! A little awkward but I kinda get it. He swung me back to my place, which was weird because he knew which window and level it was," you pursed your lips in deep thought, failed to realise the widened eyes from Jake and the panic that filled them.

"M–maybe, it was a wild guess," he said shakily.

"Wild guess? Don't bullshit me, Sim. A smart guy like you would know it's hard to do so," you waved him off, continuing to venture into your theories.

"Maybe he has some kind of sixth sense," he laughed rather stiffly, earning a suspicious narrowed stare from you. 

"Okay, big head, quit acting so weird. Let's just get calculus over with and then stop by that ice cream place after school, what do you say?" 

Jake's shoulders visibly relaxed, a sense of relief overtook his features. What was that about? "Sure. My treat,"

"God, Sim, you have to stop treating me or else I'll fall in love with you," you joked, even as it came out lighthearted, it was filled with a painful truth that you kept as a secret.

"Then fall in love with me."

You froze, almost unblinking. Something so intimate yet controversial had left his lips like it was nothing. It was probably nothing to him, maybe a mere joke even, considering how he let out a small laugh and smiled at your reaction. You tried to pretend it was nothing, but it wasn't nothing, not to you. 

For a second, you wished you weren't already in love with Jake.

Trying to be happy for your best friend shouldn't be hard, but why were you struggling with it so much?

First, you were literally in love with him. Yes, you've come to the conclusion that you 'L' word him, the big 'L'. Seeing him list out the things Gwen likes and hates reminded you of yourself knowing him equally that much too, which only pained you more than it reassured you. Second, he has been hanging out with her more. Not that you were completely friendless and have no one to hang with, but Jake was Jake, he was your best friend, and losing your best friend was the worst thing to happen. 

You didn't lose him, no, but it felt like you had. He barely made time for you, being caught up with Gwen, dates and school work, how could he not manage to squeeze you in there? You've always made time for him no matter what the occasion was, so knowing he didn't do the same for you just had you dying internally. 

It was a quiet evening in New York. The sun had just set and you were walking home from grabbing an early dinner alone. This time around, you were smarter than the previous round. Armed with pepper spray and a pocket knife, you prayed on a shooting star that an unfortunate incident would never ever happen once more. 

You were practically in your own world to even realise or hear footsteps approaching you from behind. By the time you did, your fight or flight mode was activated, almost throwing out a punch, just to freeze upon figuring out who it actually was. Spiderman.

"Walking home alone?" He kept up with your pace as you recovered from a momentary fright.

"Stalking me?" You wondered how he even spotted you in the first place. In the big city of New York, he's coincidentally strolling down the same street as you? As if. "Scared me, you know? Thought it was another round of getting robbed,"

"I'd be there to fight them off if that happens," he said with utmost confidence that it had you laughing a little, shaking your head in disbelief. Why did he remind you of Jake? It's a sign you should stop thinking so much about him.

"Really? I kinda doubt it. Unless you're keeping an eye on me or something, stalker," you teased him, egging him on further. 

"I'm not stalking you," his tone gave away the withering confidence of his. You smiled, feeling his lingering gaze on your face. Maybe it was just your mind that's overthinking, but his mannerisms reminded you too much of your best friend. It was in the way he walked, talked and how he normally did this thing where he walked with you and cast glances at you from time to time. Every little detail that you wished you couldn't list out was a part of the city's hero. 

He cleared his throat, straightening his back, trying to rebuild that confidence he originally carried. "So … how are things between you and your friend?"

"The one that stood me up at the party?"

He choked a little, but regardless, he nodded his head. "Y–yeah,"

You couldn't hold in a sigh from escaping your lips. Just thinking about Jake had you huffing in frustration. Spiderman picked up on it, shifting slightly beside you. "I guess not … good? Haven't seen him much and he hasn't been bothering to hang out with me anymore. I mean, I get he's making moves but why can't he just manage a little time for me? Maybe I'm too selfish but—" he's not mine anyway. You bite your tongue, holding back what you really wanted to say. 

The hero beside you was silent for a bit, as if walking on eggshells and picking the best words to say. "I think he'd come around," he said slowly, "he'd say a couple of sorrys, and you should tell him what's on your mind. Let him know. He'll understand," 

You chewed on your bottom lips, considering the possibilities, but totally also not expecting to get advice from the Spiderman like it was some counselling session. "I know he'll listen. He always does. But I don't want anything to change between us,"

"Nothing will change," he said with a kind of certainty that even you didn't doubt. How did he know? Who was he to judge? You didn't say anything, but just nodded. You knew Jake wasn't the type to argue nor take your words lightly, but you shudder at the thought of a confrontation, not that it was your first with him, but it felt much more emotional this time.

"I hope so. I miss him—oh, my place is around the corner, I can manage myself," you stopped before a turn around the corner, Spiderman following suit. 

Standing before him only increased your curiosity about his identity. Who was he? He was hiding under a mask that shielded his face, but something about him seemed less foreign than expected. 

"O–oh, then I guess I should get away too. Swing around the city and see whose ass to beat," he laughed awkwardly, a hand automatically reaching for the back of his neck, just like something Jake would do too. You shook that thought away. "Goodnight … stranger,"

"It's Y/N," you didn't hesitate to tell him your name, he saved your life, a little information about yourself wouldn't hurt despite him being a total stranger still. "Goodnight, spider boy."

You turned around the corner, leaving the hero standing there, bewildered and helpless. It was hard to ignore the pit in your stomach that carved deeper and deeper. He reminded you too much of your best friend, and strangely, that was probably the reason why you felt gradually attached to him, a stranger that resembled the ghost of a guy you liked but couldn't have. 

The space of your apartment was dark and soulless once you stepped into it. Your parents worked late as always, meaning you were alone most of the time, and this was one of them. Maybe it was the atmosphere and the countless wishful thinking, but a sense of despair knocked on the door of your heart. 

By the end of the night, you laid awake in bed thinking about what Spiderman had said. Nothing will change. That was exactly what you wished for too, that your dynamic with Jake was never to change, but how was that to happen when he's got a girl around? Eventually, you're not just going to lose the guy you loved, but your best friend as a whole.

Your train wreck of thoughts were interrupted the moment you heard a knock on your window. That knock turned into a tune that you knew too well. Sitting up straight in bed, you spotted the figure standing by your window out on the fire escape. Jake. 

At this point, you weren't even going to figure out how he got up this high on the fire escape. It was one too many times of him avoiding your question and you ended up dropping the matter too. Yet, curiosity itched your mind. 

Unamused at the fact that he turned up at possibly the wrong timing, you dragged your legs over to the window, meeting his bashful gaze. He offered a crooked grin, but your narrowed eyes only shot it back into a frown.

"Explain to me why you're here? It's midnight, Aunt May would be worried about you," your window was opened now, but you stood in the way before he could climb through, an interrogative look of yours stared at him accusingly.

"I told her I'd be over at yours," he answered cheekily. "Just like the old times, eh?"

Judging from your unbudging stance and eyes practically shooting lazers, Jake knew he had struck a nerve that have been left untreated for far too long. He sighed a defeated breath, squeezing through forcefully and dropping his backpack onto the ground. 

"I know," he didn't need to say much, yet he conveyed more than needed. "I've been a shitty best friend,"

It was your turn to sigh. You shook your head, averted your gaze to the ground and stepped aside, giving him more space. "You know a 'sorry' alone won't cut it this time,"

He followed your every movement, joining you to sit on the edge of your bed, a small space in between separated you and him. "I know. But I really am sorry, Y/N. I mean it,"

"I just want you to be honest with me, Jake. I know you're busy, I know you're trying to get the girl of your dreams or whatever, good for you, but it feels like you've forgotten about me or something,"

"I didn't forget about you. How could I ever?"

"Well, then stop acting like it! A text would suffice," you stood up, back facing him just so you could hide your face from him and the tears welling up in your eyes. 

"Y/N," he grabbed a hold of your wrist, cold fingers wrapped around your skin, his touch ever so gentle. "I'm sorry. I know I fucked up … many times, and a single 'sorry' wouldn't make up all the hurt I caused you, b–but there's a reason why,"

"What is it then?" You whirled around to face him, the dark of the room casted a shadow over his face, bringing out the fatigue and injury on his delicate features. "What the fuck, Jake? Are you hurt again?"

"It's nothing,"

"You said it's nothing every time you turned up hurt, and I never ask many questions, but Jake, it feels like you're hiding something from me," your hand reached up for his face, hovering over the bruises and mild cuts on his lips and skin. "I don't know you anymore,"

Jake moved his face away a little, grabbing that hand of yours which hovered over his face, lacing his fingers into yours, the rough surface of skin contrasting your soft touch. "I–I wish I could tell you what it is right now, Y/N, I really do, but it's not the right time. I need you to trust me, I need you to believe me, I don't want to hurt you,"

There was a moment of silence where you stood before him, hands intertwined with his, your hurtful gaze scanning his every feature that you knew too well. Jake never lied to you, you knew that, but why couldn't you fully trust him this time? There was a sense of truth and lie hidden behind his words, but you knew one thing, he was genuine. Yet, it wasn't enough. 

"Let me make it up to you. There's this carnival in the city tomorrow night, you and I, hang out, what do you say?" He tried offering a smile, which eventually turned uncertain. "We can spend the entire day together. Just you and me,"

"No bailing on me this time?"

"Promise,"

"You do?"

He held up your interlocked hands, then intertwined your's and his pinky fingers together, something you and him always did when it came to serious promises despite the childishness to the whole pinky promises thing. "Promise," he repeated. 

"I believe you, Jake. I always do, and I just don't want you to get yourself in danger, whatever it is that you're doing. Whenever you turn up bruised and beaten, I–I just feel helpless, and you push me away every time,"

"I'm sorry," he whispered, taking your interlocked hands and placing them on his chest, near to where his heart resided. "I promise to tell you the truth soon. I just need to be ready,"

"When you're ready," you gave his hand an affirming squeeze, a reassuring smile creeping up onto your lips. "Do you want to stay over?"

"I didn't turn up with a packed bag for nothing," he laughed, the air lightening up much more compared to earlier. "I'll sleep on the ground like always,"

Once you were done manoeuvring and setting up the sleeping bag for Jake, you were finally in bed for the second time that night, except now, you had Jake sleeping on the ground beside your bed. It wasn't a rare occasion having him sleep over, just maybe this time it was a tad bit more awkward given the situation you had earlier. 

"Jake," you spoke into the darkness, your eyes trained on that one spot on your ceiling. 

He hummed back in response. 

"Nothing has changed between us, right?"

A beat of silence, the whirring of your A/C was what remained. Then, he spoke. "No. Nothing's ever going to change. Nothing will change," 

It sounded familiar, the way he said it and the enunciation he had in every word. You shook it off, given the late night and a mushy brain, you didn't give it a second thought. 

"I'm glad. Goodnight, Jake."

"Goodnight."

Despite the reassurance from Jake, you descended into sleep with a pit in your gut. You could barely sleep with him next to you, thinking you could find a cure to every trouble that existed between you and him to fix it all. How could he say there'd be no changes when there's a bigger crack forming on your heart?

The next morning was like any other whenever Jake stayed over. An empty kitchen that allowed you to make some simple breakfast and after, you bid Jake goodbye for the moment before meeting him later on that day. 

Upon stepping into your room, you spotted a black lump sitting under the window. It was Jake's backpack. He was already long gone from your apartment by then. 

You advanced towards his backpack, held it up to move it somewhere else, but it only caused the contents inside to spill out. Knowing how clumsy Jake always was, you figured his backpack had been unzipped the entire time.

You glanced at the pile of mess littered on your floor, a clump of red catching your eyes amongst the rest. Curiosity got the best of you despite knowing you shouldn't pry, but the moment your fingers made contact with it, the question marks in your head increased by tenfold.

Spandex material. You pinched it at first, feeling the material against your skin, then you finally got the guts to hold it up entirely, revealing something far beyond expectations. 

Spiderman suit?

Was it a fake one? Jake could've always bought it from Amazon. You held it closer for inspection, noticing how it was worn out, slight tears on the bottoms. It couldn't be a fake, something in you knew. The dried blood stains on some spots gave it away. 

Everything made sense to you now. Jake being secretive, hiding the truth from you every time you asked, turning up hurt and disappearing at random times just for the news to report Spiderman's appearance after. All of them were finally connected in your head, and revelations about his suspiciousness were known by you.

It hit you. Jake was spiderman. Your best friend was that vigilante swinging around the city saving people and fighting crimes. He was the one who walked and swung you home. He always knew.

You let out a breath of disbelief, knees feeling weak and head spinning. How were you to shoulder the truth after this? Pretend like nothing's wrong when everything is wrong and weird. It was practically impossible to patch up the existing crack that continued to worsen. 

Shoving Jake's belongings back into the bag, you shouldered it and made your way to his place. Your mind was in a haze, the thought of him being Spiderman was hard to wrap around. Sometimes ignorance was genuinely bliss, you wished this was one of those times. 

You didn't know if it was a good or bad thing that Jake wasn't home when you turned up at his door, meeting a confused looking Aunt May instead. Apparently, Jake went out in search of his backpack that was currently in your hands, so you had no choice but to call him and wait for him to be back. 

How could you not have spotted it sooner? Now that you're in his bedroom for possibly the millionth time, everything seems clearer. The map of the city stuck on his wall which had random scribbles and locations circled in red marker ink stood out to you, the box of medicine and ointments sat on his bedside table that you frequently ignored. All the signs were presented before your eyes without your knowledge.

"Hey, sorry for keeping you waiting," Jake closed his bedroom door after almost half an hour of waiting for his appearance. His hair was dishevelled, clearly panicked and alarmed. 

"No, it's okay, we're supposed to meet up anyway," you sat up from lying on his bed, nodding at the backpack sitting on his desk. "Got your baby back,"

"Oh my God," he crossed the room with big steps and had zero hesitation when it came to unzipping it to check his belongings. "Did I leave it at your place?"

"You did," 

"Thought I left it out there somewhere," he murmured under his breath, then zipped the bag up. You knew why he was so secretive, and it made even more sense why he always brought it around. 

Jake most likely felt your wandering eyes on him judging from the way he spun around and shielded his bag from view, trying to divert your attention away. "Want to watch a movie?"

How could you possibly say no? That sly prick.

You didn't indulge in his suspicious behaviour further now that you were aware of his secret, though you pretended not to. He did say he would reveal it to you soon, but that 'soon' was quite unknown. At this point, you didn't know who was going to be the first one to reveal it. Either you or him.

You spent half of the day binging on movies, ate an early dinner and then walked to the carnival together. Along the way there, you couldn't stop yourself from taking quick glances at Jake. The street lights illuminated his features under the darkening sky, the loud chatter of the crowd drowned out and it was only him in your world. Even as he asked you questions, you blindly nodded to most of them. 

How could you not fall for him? He bought you drinks without question, won you prizes at those booths, held your hand as you walked through the crowds. It was as if Jake Sim himself was blind enough to not know what he was doing to you. 

"Enjoying the night?" Jake threw his arm around your shoulder ever so casually that it had you holding your breath for a minute.

"You won me a big bear, of course I am," you held onto the stuffed toy tightly, grinning at the memory of Jake winning during his first try. 

"What's next? Wanna stop by that art and craft booth then we go on the ferris wheel?" Jake definitely did know his way into your heart.

"Sounds good," 

You thought the night would eventually end with peace and quiet, but before it could even end, it had been ruined beyond belief. 

The big screen suddenly flashed to a news reporter, the background looking chaotic and people were fleeing. It was live news, the whole thing was happening as you breathed. You and Jake stood rooted, staring at the big screen just like many others did, listening in on the broadcast.

'Just in, a monstrous creature was seen terrorizing and climbing along the Oscorp building. It was spotted not long ago, but now it has disappeared into the building, its whereabouts unknown. Workers of Oscorp have fled the building, but not all of them, some were said to be present in the building until now.'

You glanced at Jake, a sinking feeling in your gut. It was a sour thought knowing he's about to get himself in danger yet again, but having him bailing once more cut deeper than a falling knife. As a human, you wanted him to save lives and the city. However, you were also his best friend, and you hated to be selfish, but you just wanted him to be there without having to leave every single moment.

The conflict in your eyes matched Jake's, who was evidently struggling with himself. You tried to mask it, yet hurt and sadness was hard to ignore or hide. 

"Oscorp … Gwen," the faint hush of a murmur was audible under his breath, causing you to cock your head at him.

"What?" 

"I–I, Y/N, I have an emergency," he removed his arm around you, the hold on his backpack strap tightened. 

"Jake," to scream at him? Let him leave? All of the above? You struggled with your emotions as you tried to understand and empathise, you always did, but couldn't you just have him this one time?

"I'm sorry …" his voice was weak, he knew how much pain and hurt he caused you, and retreating away from your disappointed face wasn't going to solve anything, just the problem downtown, but not the cracks that were forming right now.

"I know, Jake," you shouted when he was a distance away from you. He turned around, eyes widened and pupils blown, a mix of confusion and surprise painted his features. "I know about you,"

He was breathless, he didn't know what to say, so he didn't say anything. He left without a trace, and once again, you were left alone to fend for yourself. You wanted to understand, you do, but it was hard. 

You glanced at the big screen for one last time, uttering a silent curse under your breath, and decided to head to where the scene was. Crazy? Stupid? You were everything described. That was probably why you and Jake were best friends. 

Taking the cab was one of the stupidest decisions you made, and that excluded the part where you're literally bringing yourself to danger. Thanks to whatever that was terrorising the Oscorp building, the traffic was heavier than usual, so you had no choice but to run on foot. It was the most running you ever did all year.

You wondered if it was a good idea to even be there. Answer: no. The police cars were everywhere, all of which were stationed with police that were armed with rifles. A helicopter circled the building, several broadcasting stations and their reporters were present too. It was a mess. 

"What's happening here?" You were practically out of breath, panting, as you asked a random bystander there. 

"Some freakish lizard creature. I think Spiderman swung into the building to save the remaining victims. They were all rescued but Spiderman's still fighting in there,"

"You saw him? Spiderman?"

"I did! Red suit, white webs, he was so heroic when he crashed through the glass panels," 

"That's the one," you said unnervingly, disliking the uncertainty of it all. Jake was putting himself in danger and you could do nothing about it. How long did this go on for? You were left in the dark for far too long.

Soon, which almost felt like forever, you saw a speck of red escaping from the gap in the building with somebody in hand. You held your breath out of anxiety, heart thumping, listening in on all the noises and reports coming from everywhere around you.

"There he is! Spiderman!" A reporter appeared next to you, absolutely transfixed with the superhero slinging through the dark sky and eventually landing in the distance. "He has the last hostage in hand! A girl!" 

A girl?

You pushed past the crowd, trying to get a closer look at Spiderman and the entire scene before you. There he was, speaking to the police, but there was somebody else too. Gwen Stacy. 

An overwhelming feeling crashed down on you like a heavy weight of boulders falling from the sky. Confusion, hurt, heartbreak, altogether they penetrated you harder than you could manage to breathe. One step, two step, you took many steps back before turning away and hailing for a cab home. 

He wasn't yours, and he wasn't yours to lose either.

Returning home to an empty apartment was nothing new, except it did hit differently this time. Your heart was empty, mind in a haze, it was as if your narrator had drawn swirls over your head. You wished things had turned out in another way. You and Jake, how you found out about his secret, him hiding his secret. If only all of them had another ending than what you had in the present.

You sat slumped over in bed, the desk lamp was the only thing that provided light for the darkness in your room. The shadow looming over your window went unnoticed by you. That was until a series of knocks sounded and you jumped out of bed in alert, finding it strange how there was nothing once your eyes trained on your window.

Well, there goes your future. 

You stepped a little closer. Just then, the window was jerked open by some unseen force, a red cladded face peeking his head into frame. Spiderman, or more accurately, Jake, was standing on your fire escape again. 

He dropped his backpack onto your bedroom floor, letting himself in wordlessly. You stared at him, not knowing whether to speak first or let him be the one to do it. After all, he had left you hanging, it's the least he could do.

Jake pulled off the mask from his head, revealing a rather beat up face and messy, dishevelled hair that was coated with sweat. "You knew?"

His voice was tired, but the confusion and hurt punctuated through his words. He inched close to you, but you took a step back, unable to meet his gaze.

"Well, it wasn't a long time," you muttered. "Just today, actually … coincidentally,"

"How?" 

"Your backpack. I swear I didn't look through it, it was unzipped and when I picked it up, everything spilled out. Your suit revealed it all," you chewed at your bottom lip, Jake's eyes boring into yours, the prickling feeling of anxiety crawled all over your skin. "I didn't want to find out this way either,"

"I'm sorry for not telling you earlier. I wanted to, trust me, you're one of the closest people I have in my life. But I just didn't know when or how to break it to you. I wanted to protect you, to keep you safe," he was equally guilty for hiding it for a long time, but you understood the reason behind it. Being a hero comes with a great responsibility, that was what movies taught you anyway. 

"Jake, I know, and it's okay, but I just wish to be selfish for a little. I want you to be here with me, to be there for me a–and be my best friend for a minute," you felt yourself losing the will to speak as seconds passed by. "I feel like I'm losing you,"

"You're not. I'm here," he pressed his palm against his heart, stepping closer until he was barely a few inches away. "Always,"

"I don't want to lose you, Jake," your voice wavered, a clear sheen of tears glazed your eyes. "I'm in love with you," your words came out in a whisper, a hushed confession that spilled with no warning, coming from the deepest, darkest pits of your heart. Even then, you couldn't believe you had actually said it, stilling in place and blinking in shock. 

Jake's breath hitched, his movements frozen. You wondered about the possible scenarios you were about to face, ones that you thought of whenever you had the urge to spill your love confession.  All of them certainly didn't prepare you for what was happening next.

"I'm sorry," shock turned into instant panic. Your hands shot out to create a small distance between you and him. "Ignore what I just said. Sorry if I made you uncomfortable—"

Jake didn't say much, and in a swift motion, he grabbed a hold of your hand, pulled you into him. One hand holding your wrist, the other cupping your face to tilt your head and his lips met yours.

You could barely register it. The weight of his mouth against yours created a mass of fireworks in both your head and stomach. The shock evaporated from your body and relief took its spot. You melted against his touch, leaning your body closer to his. 

Jake kissed you like no man could have ever done. He left a part of himself, imprinted his every unspoken word into a deep and passionate kiss. You wondered if this was what it felt like being loved by him.

Forever was what you wished for when it came to kissing him. Yet, it eventually came to an end just like every one of your favourite movies. This time, however, you weren't disappointed, you were glad. 

"Don't apologise. Y/N, I'm in love with you too," his hand on your cheek remained, the dim light managed to bring out the sparks in his pupils. It was your turn to be confused. Didn't he have a crush?  "I know what you're thinking. Gwen—" it's freaky how he always knew, "—I was kinda dumb, to be honest. I was always in love with you but it took me years and a girl to only realise that,

"She was nothing like you. The more I got to know her, the more I thought of you. I wasn't trying to like her, I was trying to find a piece of you in her. Being the coward that I am, I ran away from facing the thought of liking you, I didn't want to ruin our friendship. So, I kept on entertaining the thoughts of liking Gwen instead, but none of it was real. You're the one who's constantly taking up space in my mind, in my heart,"

The fireworks from earlier exploded ten folds in your mind. You couldn't believe you were experiencing every passing moment listening to Jake's confession. He felt the same way as you did for him. He has had the same pining for you like the same way you had for him. Years, years of unspoken romantic love for one another that both were too scared to touch upon. 

Jake took your shell shocked silence as an opportunity to continue on. "I'm sorry for standing you up all the time. I'm sorry for hiding the truth from you. I'm sorry for avoiding you. I'm sorry for not realising it sooner. But I love you, Y/N. You're my best friend, more than anything, you're the only person I want to have occupying my mind all the Goddamn time,"

"Jake," your hand travelled to place itself onto his which rested on your face. "I love you too," you laced your hand into his, the intimacy that would've been seen platonic days ago was now something more than that. You and him both felt the shift, it was apparent. 

"I don't care that you're Spiderman," you continued, not once breaking eye contact with him, letting him stare into yours as you did the same. "You're Jake to me, you forever will be, and that's all that matters,"

Jake's delicate features melted into a smile. His pretty smile that had you swooning was on display like a trophy, influencing you enough to crack a small grin too. He looped an arm around your waist, dipping you slightly and pressing a haste kiss on your lips, then your cheeks. 

"I guess I can now say I've swung into your heart," he teasingly sent a wink flying at you, to which you responded with an eye roll. Some things never changed, but his ego definitely was inflated now.

"Shut up before I kick you out," you threw a light punch at his shoulder, which he dodged almost unsuccessfully. "Come on, let's patch you up then we can go to bed," you patted his shoulder, walking towards your bathroom. 

"Demanding," he whistled under his breath, picking up his discarded mask from the floor. 

"Don't make me add a black eye to your face,"

"But you like my pretty face,"

"You want to test it out?"

"Okay, okay. I'm coming."

The night eventually ended with Jake being patched up and sleeping on your bed instead of his usual spot on the ground. These little changes was what you anticipated most, but other than that, it was safe to say nothing would be changing when it came to your and Jake's relationship. If anything, it was about to be stronger. 

So what if he was Spiderman? At least you knew Spiderman was yours, and he had indeed swung into your heart.

Dating your best friend who had a secret identity was fun. 

You got to discuss maths in school and listen to his adventures after. Not to mention, he would swing you around New York City at times once the clock striked past midnight. No other girl was going to get a date like this. Ten out of ten, you may add. 

With the fun came the terror. You do fear for Jake's safety almost every time he's out, and it has become a routine to patch him up till the point where you had to restock your emergency kit. This time was like no other when Jake appeared through the window soundlessly in his Spiderman suit.

"Hey," he was breathless, tumbling over the window still. 

You jumped, not even realising his appearance. "What the hell? Jake? Oh my God," you got up right away to support his tired body, but he ended up sliding down onto the ground anyway.

"Are you injured anywhere? Bleeding?" You checked for his body, trying to spot any obvious cuts, making yourself comfortable in the space between his legs. 

"No," his hand reached for the end of his mask, pulling it up halfway only to reveal his lips. "Can I get a kiss?"

"Are you serious?"

"I am dead serious," 

You rolled your eyes, leaning down to press a kiss on his lips that eventually widened into a satisfied smile. You gently slapped his face, eliciting a sweet laugh from him and with a tug of his hand, he fully removed the mask from his head, revealing his pretty face that you missed.

"I got something for you," his hand reached out to brush your hair away from your face, his touch ever so gentle when it came to you. He dug something out of his bag, pulling out a fresh bouquet of flowers. "Ta-da," 

"Flowers?" You accepted the bouquet from him, noticing all of your favourite flowers in it. He remembered, even the littlest details about you, he remembered them all.

"I got them on the way here," you raised an eyebrow at him. He threw his hands up in defence. "Hey, I didn't steal them. I actually paid for them. They gave me a discount too because I was in my suit,"

You resisted a smile. "You're unbelievable,"

"Unbelievably cute? Romantic? Handsome?" He leaned in closer to you, noses close enough to brush against one another. 

"Go away," you squeezed his cheek, and he just let you do so without any fight. You threw your arms around his neck, hugging him briefly. "I like them,"

"What about me?"

"I like you too,"

 "But I like you more," 

You threw your head back laughing, a simple sound which was enough to have Jake's heart racing. "We're not making this into a competition, stupid. Now, go shower or else you're not sleeping on my bed,"

"But—"

"Nope. Shower or get exiled,"

"Fine," he dragged his body up sluggishly, looking almost like a puppy being forced to his dismay: the shower. "You're not joining me?"

"Don't make me chase you out." you threw a pillow at him that he skillfully dodged. Damn his spider senses. His laughter echoed around your bedroom until he disappeared into the bathroom, the sound of it gave comfort to you and your beating heart.

Things might've changed a little in different aspects, but you knew nothing could change you or Jake altogether. He was your best friend and lover no matter what he was. Spiderman or loverboy, he was everything to you. All you knew was that he was going to be by your side no matter what, protecting your heart alongside the city. 

( © jaylver all rights reserved. do NOT copy, plagiarise or edit my work and repost whatsoever. once discovered will be exposed and blacklisted. )

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[makoodles]

ミtìohakx

[tI.o."hak’] P F n. hunger

🍓 pairing: tsu'tey x human fem reader

🍓 tags: nsfw, tsu'tey pov, misunderstandings, vaginal sex, oral sex (f receiving), reader has nipple piercings, size kink, human x na'vi sex

🍓 wordcount: 18k

masterlist

it's been far too long since i wrote for my grumpy boy, so here were go! tsu'tey is really horny in this one guys lmao i'm sorry

reblogs are always enormously appreciated!

There is something wrong with Tsu’tey.

Like, seriously wrong.

This isn’t necessarily a new sentiment to him; he’s been wondering if there’s something fundamentally broken in him for some time now, as if Sylwanin’s death had damaged him more than he could even tell. In the long and painful years following her death, he never so much as glanced at another woman with passing interest. In fact, he had convinced himself that he was no longer capable of experiencing anything even close to romantic or sexual feelings with anyone other than his first love.

Even when he was betrothed to Neytiri, his feelings never developed past fond friendship. Their mating would have been a duty, albeit one he was content enough to perform if it meant that he could serve the clan and maybe, finally, put some of that awful, bone-deep loneliness behind him. But while he loved Neytiri dearly, he could never drum up any real physical attraction beyond the aesthetic appreciation of knowing that she was a beautiful woman.

And that was fine. Tsu’tey never really had a problem with that. He had mostly resigned himself to never experiencing that kind of love again, even if the thought left him hollow on the inside. He’s always been proud to be the kind of man that throws all he has into all into his community and friendships and duties, but he can’t help but wish things were different. It feels a little as though he’s standing stagnant while everyone around him moves on.

The Omaticaya rebuild when the Sky People leave; families are built, bonds are made, and the People move forward. Everyone but Tsu’tey, it feels.

Tsu’tey, instead, finds himself tragically, humiliatingly preoccupied with matters that would surely never have even occurred to him before the war with the Sky People. Well, only one matter, really.

Instead of doing what is expected of him by finding a mate and settling down, like most other men his age in the clan, Tsu’tey finds himself distracted in a way that is completely unbecoming. He goes through his usual motions of hunting, weaving, carving, training, and yet he feels distant from it all, as though his thoughts and attention are elsewhere.

When he’s not carrying out his duties, he’s mortifyingly distracted by just one of the little sky demons that lingers around the village. You.

It would have been unthinkable for him only a few years ago. Even now, Tsu’tey can’t help but wonder if some essential part of him is broken. It’s the only way he can think to explain why you have captured his attention so completely.

There’s nothing special about you. Tsu’tey’s not completely delusional; he can recognise that you’re just a regular Sky Person, nothing impressive. You can’t hunt, you are bad at weaving, and you look odd. You are so tiny and weak, nothing like the willowy and strong women of his clan.

And yet, all of your odd differences are what end up endearing you to him. Tsu’tey has always felt compelled to protect, to serve his clan and defend his people. You’re small and soft, with your strange little face and pretty eyes, and you have no way of defending yourself. Perhaps that was how his fascination with you had started, but it’s since grown into a tentative… friendship, almost.

You visit the village almost every day, to help out where you can or to accompany Norm or even sometimes (and Tsu’tey sometimes has to centre himself to make sure he’s not reading too much into your alien behaviour) just to spend time with him.

“Hey, big guy,” You call out, like you always do, sashaying your way across the village towards him.

Tsu’tey doesn’t look up from where he’s sitting outside his hut, carving a small wooden bowl. It takes quite a bit of effort to look unaffected and casual, especially when his tail had begun to curve around his legs from the moment he had picked up on your sweet scent on the breeze.

“Demon.” He greets back. He chances a quick glance up at you from beneath his eyelashes, hoping you don’t notice.

Then he does a double take, his head snapping up to look at you again as he completely forgets to feign disinterest.

Tsu’tey is used to having you around the village, and he’s used to stifling his embarrassing attraction towards you as best he can. What he’s not used to is the sight of you wearing such tiny little shorts, or such a tight top. The alien fabric is stretched tight across your breasts and so thin that he can see the subtle shape of your nipples beneath the taut fabric.

His stomach does an odd sort of flip, leaving him dizzy.

It's not that he’s shocked by your body – you are still entirely covered (and he tries to quash the disappointment that niggles in the back of his head), and he has seen many female bodies before.

But this is you, and he has never seen so much of you before. The sky demons are confusingly modest and oddly ashamed about their bodies, which means that Tsu’tey has simply had to tackle his odd embarrassing attraction to you with nothing more than his imagination. To see you now like this feels like a physical blow.

Tsu’tey inhales so sharply that he nearly chokes on his own breath. “Tawtute, what—?”

“You said we could go swimming in the river today.” You say, raising the weird little hairy ridges on your brows.

Ah, he thinks, a little dazed. He had said that. It had been a moment of madness, on his part. He had been trying to come up with an excuse to invite you to spend more time with him, and the added incentive of getting to show off some of his skills to you had made him over-eager and excited.

“Mn.” He grunts, his eyes glancing down over the length of your legs, your soft squishy skin all exposed by your tiny shorts. They’re hitched high on your hips, which draws his eyes to your waist and then up again to your breasts, where your top clings to the soft round shape of them.

His eyes follow your hips as you cock them to the side, your hands landing on the curve of your waist. Damn. He… he should really be familiar with the shape of you, by now. You’ve been a near constant presence in the village since the moment you had made the decision to stay behind on Pandora to live in the shoddy human outpost in the nearby forest.

He knows what you look like. But he’s never really seen you in clothes this tight and small before. It’s stupid. Really stupid. He can’t really explain why the sight of your squishy little thighs in those shorts has turned his thoughts into a pathetic buzzing mush of white noise.

You tilt your head, obviously waiting for him to say something. Your eyes are all shiny, looking at him with an expectant smile.

“Yes.” Tsu’tey swallows thickly, forcing himself to his feet. “You wish to swim.”

The thought is a little thrilling. Perhaps he will even be able to catch a few fish in front of you as well. Showing off physical prowess is just one way of impressing a potential mate, and while it’s not initially what he had intended with the offer, the idea of putting on a mating display for you makes excited heat simmer low in his belly.

“Well, you offered.” You remind him, biting at your lower lip under your mask. Your mouth looks all glossy and wet, more so than usual; he wants to touch your lips more than anything.

“Yes. I offered.” He nods, looking down at you as you stand in front of him.

Ah, the height difference is going to his head a little – your face is just level with his belly button, your head tilted all the way back so that you can gaze up at him. His cock twitches at the sight.

“Come.” Tsu’tey says, trying to shake off his distraction before he embarrasses himself.

Just like always, you happily follow after him as he leads the way away out of the village towards the forest. He glances over his shoulder a couple of times, just to make sure that you’re still there.

“I was thinking that after swimming, we could go for a walk,” You say, your little legs working overtime in an attempt to keep up with him. “I’ve been craving that fruit you let me try last time. You know, the one that looks like a blue balloon, but is pink on the inside and really sweet?”

He slows down so that you can keep pace with him more easily, his eyes drawn down to you as you walk. You don’t seem to be wearing your strange little chest covering that usually covers your breasts under your other top, which means that your soft breasts are bouncing lightly with every step you take. Tsu’tey nearly trips over his own feet when he notices, because now it’s like he can’t keep his eyes off you.

The Sky People are demons, a plague on his planet and his people. But you are so bright and sweet, always excited to see him and spend time with him. And your soft body is so different to the Na’vi women he’s used to – you have so much give to you, squishy and bouncy where Na’vi women are firm and lean, especially in places like your thighs and breasts and little tummy. Tsu’tey has never struggled with his self-discipline as much as he does around you.

“Kllpxiwll.” He says, his voice coming out a little less strong than he’d like. “Yes. We can walk later.”

You beam at him, making his tail lash around his ankles. Your cheeks squish up when you smile like that, and his fingers itch with the desire to squeeze at your face.

“Great!” You say brightly, before reaching out to take his hand in yours.

This time, Tsu’tey really does trip. He manages to regain his balance quickly enough that there’s a chance you didn’t notice, but then he looks down at you with wide eyes. Your hand is so small, your little slender fingers curling around his much larger palm, and Tsu’tey swears his heart skips over a beat at the feeling.

Ah, you need his hand for the balance – you hold tight to him as he helps you step over logs and through the long glowing grass between the huge trees. You use your grip on him both as leverage to climb over some of the obstacles before you and to make sure that Tsu’tey keeps his pace slow that you can keep up.

You even glance up at him, your expression uncertain and a little vulnerable, as though you’re unsure how he’s going to react to your touch. He can understand why; he’s never been shy about letting his distaste for your kind known.

 But you’re different. He wonders if you know it – you must know, right? It must be obvious to you, how he looks at you with starry, moronic eyes.

He looks away, struggling to keep his expression cool and neutral. He lets you hold his hand but doesn’t squeeze back, nervous about how tiny your hand is in his and how he might hurt you without even meaning to.

After a moment or two you withdraw your hand, biting at your lip as a small frown tugs at your brow.

When the two of you reach the river, Tsu’tey turns to you and waits. He feels as though he’s holding his breath, watching and waiting as his stomach turns flips. He feels antsy and itchy, his fingers twitching as he forces his face to remain as still as possible.

You raise your eyebrows, tilting your head as your mouth twitches in amusement. “Is there a reason you’re glaring at me like that, babe?”

Tsu’tey frowns reflexively; you’re always calling him strange little nicknames that he doesn’t understand, and he’s yet to decide whether he likes them or not. He decides to focus on the other part of your sentence.

“I am not glaring.” He protests, though he doesn’t relax his face. This expression mostly comes naturally to him, and he doesn’t really want you to see him open and mushy anyway. “I am—I am looking.”

“Okay,” You drawl, drawing the word out. “Looking at me?”

“No. Get in the water.” He says, and it accidentally comes out sounding like an order.

He’s lucky you’re used to his brash manner and blunt attitude, because you just roll your eyes at him instead of taking offence. That’s part of the reason he finds you so lovely, always so sweet and bright even when he makes a mess of communicating with you. His tail coils, so relieved that he hasn’t messed this up yet with you.

When your small hands reach for the button on your tiny shorts, Tsu’tey can’t help but stare. You push the strange rough blue material down over your thighs, and he takes a steadying breath through his nose as you push them down to your ankles.

It’s the first time he’s seen you so exposed, so vulnerable – so… human. Your body is perfect. Beautiful. Soft and curvier than a Na’vi woman, so much smaller than him. He feels a little guilty about the way he’s looking at you so lecherously, but he can’t seem to stop.

He feels his mouth go dry, but he can't bring himself to look away. He's never seen you like this, and he'd never forgive himself if he missed this opportunity just to look.

You step out of your shorts, left in just that thin white top and tiny bottoms that he has heard you call ‘panties’ before. They are small, more revealing than the loincloths worn by his people, so thin and dainty. They cling to you, and Tsu’tey swears he feels his thoughts dissolve into pure nothingness at the realisation that he can practically see the outline of your—

“You’re coming too, right?”

Tsu’tey blinks, a little dazed. When he speaks, his voices comes out a little too sharp yet again. “What?”

You’re looking at him, your eyebrows raised and scrunched a little as you stare at him. You’re confused, he realises, and it takes a moment to realise that it must look as though he’s been glaring at you yet again.

It’s just... That... is a lot of skin. It feels illicit in a way that he’s not used to, because he doesn’t normally see this much of you. It feels like human modesty is now rotting his brain if this is how he’s reacting to just the sight of your bare legs.

“You good?” You ask, and you sound a little uncertain now. “You look… you look kinda angry.”

Tsu’tey manages a grunt, but he doesn’t trust himself to actually speak. His tongue feels too big for his mouth, and he’s sure his words will just come out clumsy and thick. He glances away from you before picking at the ties of his battle band around his waist, drawing it away from him and settling it aside in the phosphorescent moss. He feels naked without it, though he doesn’t remove his tewng.

“I am not angry.” He says at last, pleased with how steady he sounds.

You just hum, and step away from him towards the water. He watches you go, his gaze trailing over all your soft flesh. This cannot be normal. Human women are not supposed to be this attractive, and Na'vi men are certainly not meant to be attracted to them.

And yet... he can't resist sneaking glances at you whenever the opportunity presents itself. Your bare skin, your soft body, your bouncing breasts, your lips... you’re driving him mad. His twitching cock beneath his loincloth means that there is no chance of pretending he doesn’t know how attracted he is to you.

You step into the water, letting out a breathy noise of surprise at the temperature. “Oh, it’s cold!”

He watches you walk ahead of him into the river, his eyes are drawn to your hips, then your waist, then... he feels his face grow hot. Get a grip, Tsutey. You're being ridiculous.

But... oh Eywa...

Tsu’tey just breathes. He closes his eyes for a moment, just to collect himself. He’s being an idiot. He’s better than this; he is a warrior, a hunter, he has been trained for leadership and has fought alongside Toruk Makto. There is no good reason for a human woman to bring him to his damn knees like this.

You wade in a little deeper, until the running river water gurgles around your thighs. Then a little further, until the current is rippling around the bare skin of your waist. Then you keep going, until you’re submerged up to your neck, and you’re making a scrunched up little face as you hiss through your teeth.

“Shit! How can the water be this cold when it’s so hot out!” You complain again, your nose all wrinkled.

Oh.. you’re just adorable. Tsu’tey feels his fingers twitching again, wanting so badly to touch and squeeze and pinch.

You glance back over at him, and give him an odd little look. “Hey, are you coming? I didn’t come here just to swim by myself!”

Tsu’tey stumbles slightly as he makes his way to the edge of the water. Fuck, he’s just a mess of warring emotions right now. All he seems to be able to do is stare at you with hot, hungry eyes.

He glances away again, unable to keep looking at you any longer. He takes a deep breath and dives into the water, keeping his body straight as an arrow as he spears through the water and surfaces only a few feet from you.

The water is cold, but he finds it refreshing. It shocks some awareness back into him, makes him feel a little more normal and less stunned.

You squeal with laughter as his dive splashes you, throwing your head back as you bob in the water nearby. You paddle a little closer to him, swimming a little deeper until you’re treading water next to him.

“It is cold.” He breathes. It’s the only thing he can think of to say that’s even mildly intelligent, yet it sounds like it falls entirely flat.

But you just giggle as though he’s told a wonderful, highly intelligent joke. His ears twitch, relishing the sound of your laughter.

Tsu'tey swallows thickly, his eyes drawn down to your chest. Your thin white top has turned translucent, and clings to the soft shape of your breasts. Through the thin wet fabric, he can see the prominent shape of your nipples.

“I’ve been looking forward to this swim all day,” You’re saying, blissfully unaware Tsu’tey going through his crisis right at your side. “It’s been hot – honestly, the cold water is a bit of a relief, right?”

“Mngh.” Tsu’tey makes an odd grunting noise, before inhaling sharply and tearing his gaze away from you.

He dips down, allowing the river water to engulf him as it rushes over his head. He half-heartedly hopes he drowns, too, but that thought only lasts a moment before he resurfaces and takes a deep, grounding breath.

He can do this. It’s fine. He enjoys spending time with you, especially when he gets to steal you away from the village and the outpost and gets to enjoy your company away from all the curious eyes of the clan. He likes the feeling of having you all to himself.

He swims with you for a while, enjoying the feeling of the water current running over his skin and stealing looks at you as often as he can without you noticing.

You’re so small and soft, and you look pretty in the glow of the sunlight filtering through the trees that shelter the river. He swallows thickly. It feels like he’s witnessing something he never imagined he’d be allowed to see. Your hips. Your waist. Your soft thighs. Your… everything. Fuck, he wants you.

Eventually, you tire, and paddle your way back to the riverbank. Tsu’tey follows as if he’s been magnetised, orbiting nearby you as you clamber your way back onto the sand. Then you lay out on the bank in the sun to dry off, and Tsu’tey feels his pulse throbs hot and heavy in his throat.

He climbs out after you, his tail swinging low as his eyes trail over your figure. Your wet clothes cling to you, the soft fabric of your panties sticking to your hips and your translucent white top revealing almost everything to him.

He settles next to you, unable to look away from the way your nipples are firm and stiff where they're pressing against the thin top. Then his brow furrows, and he cocks his head.

“Tawtute…” He murmurs before he can think better of it, laying on his side as he looks down at you. “I.. may I ask you a… question?”

“Mhm. Of course.” You say without opening your eyes, enjoying the gentle heat of the sun warming your skin.

Tsu’tey swallows, wonders very briefly if he should keep his thoughts to himself, but his curiosity burns at him. He knows very little about Sky People, and he’s never truly felt any real impulse to learn more. But you’re laying next to him right now, and he finds himself very intrigued indeed about your body and possible… physical differences between you.

“It—Sky People bodies are different to ours,” He says. He attempts to keep his voice steady and as confident as possible, and possibly overcompensates by simply scowling. “It looks—it looks as though you have more nipples than we do. Why is that?”

Your eyes fly open, wide and startled beneath the clear material of your mask, and you stare up at him for a long moment of bewilderment. “I—excuse me?”

Tsu'tey flounders for a moment, thrown off by your tone, heat rushing to his face. "It looks as though—”

You glance down at yourself as he gestures clumsily at your chest, barely covered in your translucent white human fabric. Your expression clears as realisation hits, and then you bite your lip as though you’re trying not to laugh.

“Oh.” You breathe, placing your hand over your breasts. “No, sweetheart. They’re just—they’re just pierced.”

Tsu’tey stares at you uncomprehendingly. “Pierced?”

You nod, and Tsu’tey blinks. The revelation takes him by surprise, though he’s still not entirely certain what you mean by it. Human women pierce their nipples? To him, your breasts are already the most beautiful thing in the world. Why would you want to poke holes through them? What is the thought process behind that?

"Why?" he finally asks, his tone bewildered. "What is the purpose?"

“It’s not.. it’s not that there’s a purpose..” You trail off.

In the ensuing silence you stare at him, as though begging him to understand what you mean, before apparently realising that he isn’t going to. You bite your lip, then glance around as though checking that you’re still alone with him.

“I guess… well, nudity’s not a big deal for Na��vi, right?” You murmur, your fingers fidgeting with the hem of your top. “Is it alright if I take this off?”

Nudity certainly isn’t a big deal to his people, not in the way it is for any of the tawtute. The Na’vi are comfortable in their bodies, and so the strange modesty of the Sky People is completely foreign to him. He has seen female breasts every day of his life, the chest coverings worn by the women of his people designed to decorate rather than conceal, and yet he has never in his life been filled with such an all-consuming desire to see a pair of tits before.

“Yes.” He says immediately, keeping his face as cool and unreadable as possible in an attempt at hiding his sheer desperation. “It is no ‘big deal’.”

You hesitate another moment, looking shy and a little embarrassed as you fidget with the hem of your top.

His focus is fully on you now, all his senses trained firmly on the sight of you. The desire to see what lies beneath that flimsy garment is becoming overwhelming.

Let me see, He thinks to himself. Just let me see, and maybe I'll finally be satisfied.

Finally, finally, you tug your top up and off. Tsu’tey inhales so deeply and sharply he nearly chokes on it. His eyes are drawn to your bare chest, transfixed. Your breasts are soft and squishy, perfectly shaped. And for the first time, he sees the small silver bars nestled into your nipples, which are firmed up after the cold of the water. They glitter in the sunlight, capturing his attention and holding it in a vice.

Oh, no, He thinks desperately, feeling a pang of desire deep in his loins. Far from satisfy him, the sight has only made him hunger for more. He wants to touch, especially the odd metal that glitters at your breasts.

“See?” You ask, as if he could have ever missed the sight before him. “My piercings.”

“Mmm.” Tsu’tey manages to get out. His voice is deeper than he had intended, and a little stiff. “I see them.”

You smile, as though you’re waiting for a reaction, but Tsu’tey is a little struck dumb. He watches the light of the sun shining on your wet skin, the way your breasts gently swell and fall with each exhalation of your breath, the subtle gleam of the silver of your piercings. The longer he goes without reacting, the more your expectant smile begins to fade.

“What are they for?” He manages to swallow thickly as he asks.

The question makes you laugh, which isn’t a reaction he had intended but is certainly a sound that he always cherishes.

“They’re not really for anything,” You murmur, reaching up to touch your own breast. “They’re just meant to look good, I guess.”

 Tsu’tey’s tail lashes restlessly, and he wants so badly to replace your hand with his much larger one; he knows you would look so small beneath his palms. He glances swiftly at your face, and wonders if you would be upset if he touches the little silver bars that decorate your tits.

“This is… this is what is considered attractive to Sky People?” He asks. It comes out in a croak; too much of his energy is being diverted to trying to keep his hands still and to himself.

Your smile begins to fade again, your brow creasing. “Um… sometimes, I guess. You don’t.. uh, you don’t think so?”

That is a loaded question. How is he supposed to answer that when you’re laying on the riverbank beside him with only a thin, wet scrap of fabric covering your most intimate parts? He already feels as though most of the blood in his body had redirected downwards; his cock is pulsing, enough so that he can’t actually think anymore.

All he can do is grunt like a damn talioang. Your face falls further.

“I guess they must seem kinda strange.” You murmur. You must be growing self-conscious, because you start to cover your chest with your arms.

The sight of you trying to cover that perfect view from him sends a bolt of panic through him, and he just stops short of tearing your hands away again.

“You do not have to cover,” He says quickly, before he can think about it. “Like you said, it—nudity means little to us. I do not care.”

“Right.” You say, your voice gone a little bland. “It means nothing to you.”

Tsu’tey knows that your attitude has changed, fallen a little flat. But you’re laying right there, soft and small and squishy, displaying more of your bare flesh than he has ever seen from you, and he can’t pull his thoughts together.

He feels no better than the moronic young warriors that push each other around and whisper nonstop about the women of the clan. He is a skilled warrior, an excellent hunter, and a good provider for the whole clan – he is also experienced with women, so he can’t understand why the sight of you is turning him into a hormonal teenager again.

“Nothing.” He agrees stupidly, still struggling not to be too obvious with his staring.

You purse your lips, but drop your arms all the same. Tsu’tey tries not to goggle.

Oh no, He thinks miserably to himself as he watches the little barbells in your nipples sparkle in the sun. I really am broken.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ

Tsu’tey is quite certain that he’s made a fool of himself in front of you.

He’s never been good at expressing himself or his emotions, and his attraction to you scares him as much as it excites him. He alternates between reticence and putting his foot in his mouth, between being unable to meet your gaze and being unable to look away.

He probably looks deranged. He feels deranged.

To make it worse, he knows that his interest in you is obvious to anyone in the clan that watches him interact with you for even a short time. He feels the eyes on him all the time, watching, often looking vaguely sympathetic, which is somehow worse than the horror he had been expecting.

Mercifully no one has said anything to him just yet. At least, no one of any great importance.

“So, you’re telling me that she was laid out next to you, practically naked, just to show off her pierced tits, and you did nothing?” Jakesully demands, his voice like the constant droning buzz of an irritating insect in Tsu’tey’s ear.

Tsu’tey chews sullenly at some roasted teylu, trying and failing to tune his Olo’eyktan out so that he can enjoy his meal.

“Come on, man, seriously.” Jakesully is nudging him now, like an infernal pest. “She took off all her clothes for you, and you didn’t try to—”

“Ma Jake, there are children here.” Neytiri says primly from Jakesully’s other side. She has also been trying her best to ignore her mate, rocking the baby in her lap, but now she sends him a warning glance. The sting of her glare is dulled due to the fact that she’s visibly trying not to laugh.

“Sleeping babies, they got no idea what I’m talking about.” Jake says dismissively, though he adjusts baby Kiri in his arms and leans into his wife’s side all the same.

Tsu’tey shifts where he’s sitting next to him, and allows his gaze to wander across the gathering. He is still waiting to catch sight of you, to see you approaching from across the campfire.

“I’m just saying, man, you’re so obviously into each other that it’s actually painful to watch—”

Tsu’tey grunts irritably. “I am not discussing this.”

“You like her, and she’s all over you!” Jakesully insists. In his arms, Kiri starts to gurgle, and Jake hurriedly raises her up to his shoulder to rub at her little back.

“She is my friend.” Tsu’tey says stubbornly, focusing on his dinner.

Jakesully scoffs. “I’m your friend, but you don’t see me sitting in your lap or holding your hand or getting naked—”

“We are not friends.” Tsu’tey scoffs.

“Ouch,” Jake drawls, rolling his eyes. “Damn, man. I thought we were close.”

 Tsu’tey grumbles, scowling into the distance. The irritating thing is, he thinks that he and Jake are close. Admittedly, they still have their rocky moments; Jakesully has earned Tsu’tey’s respect, but he is also an infuriating man and Tsu’tey has always been easy to rile. But… despite their frequent bickering, Tsu’tey has come to trust his judgements.

Tsu’tey purses his lips and picks at the remaining teylu in his small carved bowl. “You… think that she may return my feelings?”

Jake groans, holding the baby with one hand as he covers his face with the other. “You’re killing me here.”

On Jake’s other side, baby Neteyam starts to fuss in Neytiri’s arms. She sighs, pressing a kiss to her son’s chubby cheek before beginning to rock him gently. She’s been listening with as much patience as she’s capable of, though the whole conversation has been punctuated with her eyerolls and scornful hisses.

“Why do you not talk with her, Tsu’tey?” Neytiri asks in a tone that suggests she thinks both men are idiots. “Explain how you feel to her.”

Tsu’tey just gives her a look of disbelief. It’s like she doesn’t know him at all. When has he ever talked about his feelings before? He prefers to just feel things intensely and then shove it all down very deep until it inevitably bursts right out of him.

It’s been a long time since he’s felt like this; not since he was a teenager fumbling his way through his feelings with Sylwanin. It’s especially embarrassing to know that it’s a sky demon that’s eliciting this reaction from him, and that his closest friends are witnesses to his humiliation.

“I am going to sit with the other tsamsiyu,” Tsu’tey sniffs, pushing himself up from the log. “Perhaps they will have some more intelligent conversation.”

Neytiri scoffs, sounding more scornful than offended. “I doubt it.”

“Besides,” Jake adds, grinning at him over Kiri’s little downy-haired head. “Here comes your little bestie.”

Tsu’tey nearly breaks his neck with how quickly he turns his head, and surely enough there you are. You’re stepping across the gathering, smiling politely at one of the old women who says something to you as you pass by her.

He hastily sinks back down beside Jake, ignoring his pointed snickers.

The closer you get, the more details Tsu’tey can see. You’re all neat and clean, still wearing those tiny shorts. But you’re wearing a different top now, this one green like the verdant leaves of the trees that tower overhead, and now he can see that you’re wearing your odd little breast covering under your top. It pushes your soft breasts up and together in a way that’s very enticing, although he is admittedly a little disappointed by the way your strange little decorated nipples are hidden beneath the padding.

“Hey, big guy.” You call out, your voice as cheerful and bright as always.

Tsu’tey’s ears twitch towards you eagerly, his nerves lighting up at the sound of your voice.

“Tawtute—” He begins to greet, but immediately chokes as you reach them and promptly climb right into his lap.

Oh fuck. His every muscle tightens, and all of his thoughts are frozen at the feel of your soft body moulding to his – you’re so small and so squishy, your soft body yielding so easily to the hard muscle of his chest.

He goes to grab at your hips as you nestle yourself into the cradle of his thighs, before panicking and grabbing at his own legs instead. He grips at his thighs harshly, his nails digging into his own skin hard enough to almost draw blood.

“Hello.” He manages to get out, sounding thick and a little stupid.

“Hi.” You reply, smiling up at him as though you think his inability to speak is adorable.

“Jesus Christ.” Jake mutters from off to the side.

Tsu’tey bares his teeth at him from over your head, but Jake is too busy sharing suggestive looks with Neytiri to even notice.

You shift, and he nearly swallows his tongue when your soft bottom settles neatly over his crotch. He panics as he feels blood rush south, and he hurriedly grabs at your hips to shift you from his crotch to his thigh, hoping that you hadn't felt his body respond in arousal.

“I—I have something for you,” He blurts, grabbing for the small carved wooden bowl he had set carefully by his side; he’s just been waiting for you to arrive. “I collected kllpxiwll berries for you earlier.”

Your eyes widen beneath your breathing mask, a pretty smile brightening up your face. “Oh, these are my favourite.”

“Yes, I know.” Tsu’tey says. His hands are still resting on your hips, enjoying how delicate you feel perched in his lap, but he feels a thin thread of panic underlying his delight. You’re so fragile, and he’s so terrified that his big rough hands will hurt you accidentally.

As you settle your bottom back onto his leg again with the bowl in your hands, he does what he does best and shoves his feelings deep, deep down. He will not allow himself to be driven mad by his desire for a human, however soft and warm and pretty you may be.

“Wow,” Jake drawls from his side. “That was really kind of you, Tsu’tey.”

"It is nothing." he replies, his voice coming out rough. "You are my friend."

It makes him want to bite his own tongue off to have you like this against him, but he forces a relaxed grin anyway. He can feel that it comes out strained, because inside he feels like he’s losing his mind. Your closeness is intoxicating, and he cannot stop himself from brushing his free hand against your thigh.

But you’ve tensed in his lap, the little bowl held tight in your lap. Under your mask, you’ve started to frown.

“Your friend.” You repeat blandly.

Jake winces at his side, and Tsu’tey suspects that he’s already put his foot in his mouth. But your soft, plump ass is seated so damn close to his cock beneath his tewng that he just can’t think straight.

“Yes.” He says dumbly. “We are friends.”

You purse your lips and look back down at the bowl of kllpxiwll berries, picking at them distractedly. “Right.”

Tsu’tey’s tail curls, uncomfortable with your sudden silence. Are you angry with him? His eyes drop down to the fruit he had gathered for you, his stomach sinking. Is it not to your liking?

“Do you not like the kllpxiwll?” He asks, leaning over your shoulder to try and get a glimpse of your face.

He can vaguely hear Neytiri make a sound of pure derision off to the side, but he’s trying his hardest to block both Jake and Neytiri out.

“It’s nice.” You say, though you don’t sound very enthused.

Tsu’tey frowns, but then you move to get comfortable and your ass nestles itself right over the ridge of his hardened cock and he swears that his vision tunnels and turns entirely dark for a second. He panics, then grabs at your hips out of pure reflex and bodily lifts you off of him.

You yelp, obviously startled, your arms windmilling as Tsu’tey thrusts you at Jake before leaping to his feet. He can see the way Jake is staring at him as though he doesn’t know whether he should laugh or not, and the way that Neytiri looks faintly disbelieving, and the way that you look all ruffled and startled as you look up at him as though waiting for an explanation for why you’ve just been so unceremoniously booted off his lap.

“Sorry, I—” Tsu’tey begins, his throat tight and much too dry as he tries desperately to come up with an excuse that has nothing to do with his dick. “You were too heavy.”

Jake’s face screws up in yet another wince before he buries his face in baby Kiri’s shoulder as though he can’t bear to watch Tsu’tey humiliate himself.

You’re still staring up at him from where he had inadvertently dumped you on the ground, your face the picture of confusion and hurt. “I’m too—what?”

Tsu’tey dithers for a moment, feeling terribly exposed. Why had he stood up? It’s only a matter of time before both you and Jake notice that he’s had a very physical reaction to you sitting perched in his lap. Neytiri has already noticed, though she’s been kind enough to direct her gaze pointedly skywards.

“I will fetch you water.” He blurts, before turning on his heel and positively fleeing.

It’s a coward’s move, leaving you confused on the ground like that, but he feels as though if he doesn’t get away from your smooth skin and pretty smile he’s going to drown.

You’re just a human, he tells himself over and over. You’re not supposed to be that attractive. You’re not supposed to do that to me. That was just me being weak.

Tsu’tey only pauses when he’s on the very edge of the gathering, taking a moment to breathe.

You’ve always been such an affectionate little thing, but his nerves can’t take so much physical contact from you. You have no idea how much restraint he is attempting to exert, how difficult it is not to press his face into your throat and leave his scent behind all over you, or to keep his hands to himself instead of allowing them to wander all over your plush skin.

But he doesn’t want to make a move on you; harbouring these desires for a Sky Person is bad enough, but the possibility of being rejected is even worse. Both because of the humiliation of rejection, and because Tsu’tey doesn’t know what he’ll do if you decide it’s too awkward to be around him anymore. He doesn’t actually know what you want from him. You had laid out almost naked next to him, but you hadn’t made any advances either. He isn’t even sure if you like him or if the Great Mother just has a cruel sense of humour.

Tsu’tey is a little clumsy when he grabs at a waterskin, glancing across the gathering. Even from this distance, he can see the unhappy frown on your face as you speak with Jake, who is visibly trying to appease you. Neytiri has taken both of the babies in her arms, tucking Neteyam into the woven net carrier on her chest so that she can hold Kiri in the crook of her elbow as Jake speaks to you.

Tsu’tey winces a little and glances away again, reluctant to watch the aftermath of his outburst unfold.

A few of the warriors nearby are drinking fermented pasuk liquor, and Tsu’tey wordlessly takes a skin and takes a long gulp of it. His silent drinking earns him a couple of odd looks, but none of them seem willing to comment on it and he’s too busy drinking and trying to ignore the ache in his crotch to explain himself.

“Are you well, Tsu’tey?” One of them finally asks, a little hesitantly.

“Fine.” Tsu’tey says brusquely. His manner does not invite any further questions, and his peers fall obligingly silent. “I am taking this.”

He clutches the skin as he prepares to return to his place at the cookfire beside you, though he pauses to take another drink before he goes anywhere. From this distance, you look a little calmer; you’re listening closely to whatever Jake is saying, nodding with a little frown of concentration.

“Tsu’tey?”

He nearly jumps out of his damn skin. He had been so distracted that he hadn’t noticed the soft-footed approach of Saeyla, who has come up on his other side.

“Saeyla.” He greets, his ears pinning back in apprehension.

Saeyla smiles, but doesn’t blink. The effect is unnerving, and gives the impression of a predator watching him. He takes another deep drink from the skin, hoping that perhaps it will help him come up with some way to salvage his pride.

“You look stressed, karyu.” She notes, taking a careful step closer.

Tsu’tey tenses, his brow drawing into his usual scowl. “I am not your karyu anymore. You have passed your iknimaya.”

Saeyla just nods, still smiling a little. The air between them feels uncomfortable, but Tsu’tey wonders if he’s the only one that notices. He still feels rather awkward about how he had rejected Saeyla so harshly that night she had approached him beneath the Tree of Souls. He does not regret rejecting her, but he does feel as though he could have perhaps done so a little more gently than he had.

But while Saeyla has been avoiding him in the months since, it seems that now she is starting to get over some of the hurt he had inadvertently caused. It is a relief to see that she has decided to take a mature approach.

“I was wondering if you could help me,” She says, tilting her head. “One of the beams in my kelku collapsed, and it is too heavy for me to lift by myself.”

From the other side of the gathering, Tsu’tey can see you get to your feet and a bolt of panic shoots through him. Why are you standing? Where are you going? Are you leaving?

“Uh, yes,” Tsu’tey says distractedly, beginning to step away from Saeyla and back towards where he had left you. “I can help.”

“Later? After the gathering?” Saeyla asks, beginning to follow him.

“Yes, yes, later.” Tsu’tey agrees, waving her off before hurriedly leaving her behind.

Walking through the dinner gathering is like attempting an obstacle course, and Tsu’tey is distracted as he tries to avoid stepping on the tails of the gathered clan. Luckily, many seem to sense his urgency, and they sweep their tails close to their bodies as they watch Tsu’tey hurry back over to where he’d left you with Jake and Neytiri.

“Tawtute,” He says when he reaches you again, his ears pinning back. “Your water.”

You look a little surprised at his abrupt return, though you bite your lip and take the waterskin he’s offering all the same. “Oh.. thank you.”

As you pull your mask up and raise the waterskin to your mouth to take a sip, Tsu’tey spares a glance at Jake and Neytiri. Their expressions are about what he had expected; Jake still looks as though he’s trying not to laugh, while Neytiri looks distinctly pitying. Tsu’tey winces, and quickly looks away again.

You’ve only just taken a sip of the water he’s brought you when you choke on it, coughing and spluttering. “Oh— what the fuck—” You gasp, hurriedly fixing your mask back over your face as you heave for breath.

Tsu’tey’s stomach sinks, glancing at the skin that he had handed to you and then at the second one still in his hand.

“Uh—wrong one.” He grunts, snatching the skin of pasuk liquor back out of your hand before handing you the other one that’s filled with water. “… Sorry.”

You’re staring at him with some disbelief now, your eyes watering a little from the strength of the alcohol beneath your exo-mask. “Have you been drinking?”

“No.” Tsu’tey scowls, then amends, “A little.”

You goggle at him with a look of faint astonishment, before you turn to look at Jake. Tsu’tey shifts, feeling rather unfairly jealous, and scowls when he sees you and Jake share a significant look.

“Right.” You say. You sound a little stiff, but you manage to conjure up a sweet smile all the same. “Well. I’m, uh, I’m going to head back to the outpost.”

“Oh.” Tsu’tey says. He hides his disappointment the best that he can, keeping his face still as his tail curls down by ankles.

“But, maybe you could walk me home?” You continue, your eyelashes batting at him.

For the first time, Tsu’tey realises that you look a little different. Your eyelashes are darker and longer, your skin tone smoothed out and even, your cheekbones a little shiny. Your lips look plumper and glossier too, a little redder than their natural tone.

He blinks at you, distracted and a little flustered by your appearance.

“Yes.” He says moronically, hastily passing off the skin full of liquor to Jake, who looks at it in bewilderment.

That makes you brighten, and you reach for his hand hesitantly as though you think he may pull away from you. Tsu’tey watches the way your small fingers intertwine with his much thicker ones, and feels his pupils expand as his tail coils in excitement.

He’s aware of the glances and whispers he’s getting from the rest of the gathered clan, and the irritating eyebrow wiggles he’s getting from Jake, the wolfish yet encouraging grins he’s getting from the warriors that he had taken the alcohol from, but he’s not focusing on any of it. All of his attention is directed towards you as you lead the way towards the forest.

“You look… nice tonight.” He murmurs, low enough that it’s just you that can hear. It comes out awkward, but he means it genuinely.

You glance up at him, and your face relaxes into a smile. You look so damn sweet, clinging to his hand and beaming at him. His heart is thudding hard enough against his chest that he swears it should be visible from the outside, and his own mouth twitches into a hesitant smile in return.

“Yeah?” You ask, your little white teeth gleaming in the remnants of the firelight as you lead the way towards the forest. “I put on a little makeup to come see you.”

Tsu’tey has no idea what that means, but he likes the idea of you doing something specially for him. He feels rather smug as he follows along after you, taking small steps to try to match your pace.

The two of you have only just reached the treeline when Tsu’tey hears a call of his name, and he pauses and glances over his shoulder to see that it’s Saeyla. She’s jogging after him, her ears pricked high in interest.

“Tsu’tey,” She says with a coy smile. “You are still coming to my kelku later?”

You pause at his side, turning to watch her approach. Tsu’tey feels flustered, though he can’t put his finger on why. Your gaze is intense when it comes to rest on the side of his face, waiting for his response.

“Yes, later.” Tsu’tey agrees, eager to be rid of her.

Saeyla smiles, satisfied, her eyes drifting once to you at his side before she turns and saunters away.

Pleased to be alone with you once more, Tsu’tey turns back to you. He can hardly contain his feelings; his ears keep twitching, his tail is coiling and flicking in anticipation, and he can’t tear his eyes away from you. It’s so far from his usual demeanour that it’s embarrassing, but you don’t seem to notice; you’ve never been very good at picking up on Na’vi body language.

You let go of his hand and start walking again faster than Tsu’tey had been expecting, and he jolts into action to try and catch up with you. Your lips are pursed, all glossy and very appealing, and Tsu’tey almost walks into a low-hanging tree bough as he’s staring at you.

His desire for you is simmering at a low boil in his belly, impossible to ignore. It makes him ungainly, clumsy with his limbs and his words, makes him uncharacteristically stupid.

How is he supposed to pursue this? The ways of Sky People confuse him, though he has tried his best to understand you and your ways of thinking. He doesn’t know the customs of human mating, and he doesn’t want to accidentally harm or offend you. Perhaps he would be better off waiting for you to make an advance, but to even think of you making such a move makes him feel so... vulnerable. It's terrifying.

It takes a few moments to realise that he’s been so lost in his own thoughts that he hasn’t noticed the silence that’s settled between the two of you. He clears his throat and increases his pace so that he’s fallen in stride with you.

“You are quiet, tawtute.” He says carefully, questioningly.

He’s not expecting you to scoff, nor shoot him such a bland, unimpressed stare.

“Are you being serious?” You demand.

Tsu’tey blinks. He’s surprised by your sudden change in mood, and wonders if he should be treading carefully now. These sudden attitude changes are bewildering; is this a human thing?

“Yes,” He says slowly. “I am being serious.”

“Unbelievable.” You mutter, promptly speeding up once more.

You don’t get very far – your legs are comically shorter than his, and it takes very little effort to keep up with you.

The outpost is not far from the village, and even with your short legs the two of you arrive at it in no time. To Tsu’tey’s confusion, you march up to the entrance with hardly a second glance at him.

“Tawtute—?” He begins, stepping after you as you ascend the little steps up to the door.

You whirl, startling him into taking a little step back.

“You’re going to Saeyla’s after this?” You demand.

Tsu’tey stares at you, wondering if you’ve gone mad. Why are you asking him this when you had been present for the conversation?

“Yes.” He says slowly. “She asked me to.”

You purse your lips again. “Saeyla, your old student?”

“Yes.” Tsu’tey repeats, beginning to frown.

“Saeyla, who asked you to mate?”

“There is only one Saeyla in the clan.” Tsu’tey points out, a little confused.

Your nostrils flare, and he realises a moment too late that you do not like that answer at all. He flounders for a moment, trying to find a way to salvage the conversation, but he doesn’t fully understand what you’re irritated about.

“She asked for help,” He says, keeping his voice low. “She wishes for help with her kelku.”

“No doubt.” You say archly, your eyes narrowing. “I guess she’s a friend of yours as well.”

Tsu’tey would not have gone so far as to call Saeyla a friend, but he supposes that she had made an extra effort to approach him to mend some of the awkwardness between them. Tsu’tey had always interpreted their relationship as a mentor-student one, so her abrupt confession the night before the clan had gone to war with the Sky People had taken him entirely by surprise.

“In a way.” He says, unsure how to express all of that.

Your funny little alien face seems to tremble for a moment, settling into an odd expression. Not for the first time, Tsu’tey wishes you had proper ears and a tail so that it would be easier for him to tell what you’re thinking.

“Right.” You say, your voice a little dull. “Well, that’s great.”

But then you turn around and march up to the door of the outpost, and it hisses open to let you in. Tsu’tey perks up, frowning. Are you leaving now? You’ve never left without giving him some kind of little hug or squeeze to his hand, or a promise to see him tomorrow.

“Tawtute—” He begins, but you don’t turn around.

“Goodnight, Tsu’tey.”

“I will see you tomorr—” He begins, but the door slides shut with a firm hiss before he can finish.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ

It takes most of the day before Tsu’tey realises that something is wrong.

Hardly a day has gone by in the last few months that you haven’t shown up at the village to watch him train and cook, or to entice him out swimming or walking or gathering. While it was once met with annoyance on Tsu’tey’s part, he has come to enjoy your company. He looks forward to your arrival now, his whole body primed and eager as he waits for you to come to the village.

But the following day, you’re nowhere to be seen.

You don’t arrive for the morning meal, and you never come to watch him train. He waits around in the afternoon, trying to look busy as he waits for you to come to the village. When you don’t show up, uneasiness begins to creep in.

He waits for dinnertime, but you don’t come to eat with him either.

He eats in silence, frowning broodily into the fire and casting frequent glances towards the forest as he waits to catch a glimpse of you. He has to deal with sympathetic and questioning glances from Jake and Neytiri all evening, which makes his skin itch. They don’t ask questions, which arguably makes it worse.

Tsu’tey doesn’t even make it to the end of the meal before he stands, making the decision to seek you out instead of waiting around.

“Good luck, man.” Jake mutters rather ominously.

Tsu’tey doesn’t bother with a reply, abandoning his half-eaten food as he marches into the forest. He’s irritated to find that he’s worried. You had been in poor humour the night before, and he’s a little bit anxious about why.

It doesn’t seem like a coincidence that your mood and attitude had changed so drastically after the two of you had crossed the human boundary of nudity. Had he gone too far? Had you been uncomfortable? Perhaps you had realised that he was looking at you in a way that decidedly surpassed friendship, and you didn’t like it.

The outpost is a shoddy eyesore of human architecture, and it makes Tsu’tey’s nose wrinkle everytime he sees it. Despite all the time he’s spent with you, he rarely visits the outpost itself, but needs must.

It takes a frustratingly long moment for him to work out the mechanism of the door, and then he has to stand there with his tail whipping around impatiently as the door compresses shut and the atmosphere is forcibly converted to air that’s breathable for humans. When the second door opens up to allow him into the outpost itself, he muscles his way in and takes one of the stupid little masks to loop around his neck so that he can take infrequent sips of air.

The outpost is cluttered with demon technology and strange furniture, and Tsu’tey picks his way around the metal floor with his nose wrinkled. He dislikes the way it feels against his bare feet.

The first person that sees him is Norm, who’s sitting at one of the messy desks with his head in his hands. It’s rare to see him in his human form, his odd dreamwalker body tucked away for the night, but Tsu’tey grunts a greeting out nonetheless.

Norm doesn’t react the way he had expected. He jerks to his feet, eyes widening at the sight of him, and he blurts, “Oh, thank god. You’re here to apologise, right?”

That gives Tsu’tey pause, and he stares at Norm in some bewilderment. “Apologise?”

Norm doesn’t appear to hear him, too busy glancing over his shoulder towards the back of the outpost as he scurries a little closer.

“Man, she’s been upset all day.” Norm keeps his voice low, as though he’s worried you’ll hear. “Just—go in there and talk to her.”

Tsu’tey frowns, but he’s already drifting towards the back of the outpost. The shoddy building is split into several sections; one for working, one for recreation, one for sleeping. There’s probably more, but Tsu’tey has never bothered looking too closely at it. All he knows is that Norm has gestured to the back of the building, towards the sleeping area.

“She is resting?” He asks, keeping his voice low to match Norm’s.

Norm scoffs. “Uh, no, I wish. She got some of that fruit wine you guys drink at celebrations. She’s a little bit… uh…”

Ah. You have been drinking. Tsu’tey feels curiosity bubble up in his chest; he’s never seen you drunk before. In this moment, he wants to see nothing more.

“I will speak with her.” He murmurs, before leaving Norm behind in favour of ducking into the back section of the outpost.

The building is rickety and mostly partitioned with fabric curtains rather than the doors that the Sky People tend to favour. As such, Tsu’tey can hear the way Norm is shooing whatever other demons are left over out of the building, presumably to give him some privacy with you.

He finds you laid out in a bed near the back, floppy-limbed and sloe-eyed as you speak with another sky demon. You’re talking with your hands, clearly feeling very passionate about whatever the subject you’re discussing is.

Tsu’tey lets his eyes wander over you, enjoying the brief moment he has before you realise he’s there. You’re wearing thin white fabric shorts covered in some sort of blue pattern, and a small little top that only reaches your midriff. You look so comfy, so warm and soft in your cosy little bed as you drink Omaticayan fruit wine and complain to your friend. Tsu’tey feels a buzzing start up in his belly and the tips of his fingers; he wants to touch you so badly it hurts.

The other sky demon spots him first, her eyes widening at the sight of him as she leaps off the bed. It takes a beat longer for you to spot him, but then you’re scrambling to your feet as well.

“Tsu’tey—” You start, almost spilling the fruit wine in your hand all over your bed. “What are you—”

“You did not come to the village today.” He says before you can finish, stepping closer to your bed.

The ceilings in the outpost are high to accommodate the bodies of the dreamwalkers, so he towers over you as kneel up on your bed, frowning up at him. He feels his cock twitch; he knows he’s bigger than you, obviously, but the size difference between you feels so stark now that he’s looking at you all curled up in your bed, rumpled and a little disheveled from the wine.

“I’ll—I’ll see you later!” Your friend blurts, before turning and rushing out.

Satisfied now that he is alone with you, Tsu’tey allows himself to sink to his knees by your bedside. Even on his knees, he is slightly taller than you in your bed.

You look a little flustered, clutching your cup of wine to your chest as you blink at him with wide eyes. It draws his eyes to your breasts, and with a little thrill of delight he sees that the fabric is sheer enough for him to get a good look at the outline of your nipples all firmed up beneath your clothes.

He so rarely sees you without the mask, and he can’t help but notice how sweet your little face looks without the clear barrier. Your eyes are all glossy and a little hazy from the wine, and you’re looking up at him as though you can’t quite believe he’s there.

“Are you alright?” He asks quietly. The moment feels so delicate, as though he might inadvertently shatter it with a raised voice, so he keeps his voice low and even as he reaches out to stroke over your squishy cheek with a single finger.

To his surprise, you jerk away from him, once again almost sloshing the wine all over yourself. You roll off the bed, holding your cup high, until you’re on your feet in front of him.

“Yes!” You say, and your voice comes out high-pitched and a bit shaky. “Fine, I’m fine. Why are you here?”

For a moment, Tsu’tey just stares at you. You’ve never pulled away from his touches. It’s always been him that’s been jittery around you, nervous in case he hurts you or pushes too far. But now you’re wobbling away from him and avoiding his gaze, and that makes something that feels a lot like panic settle into his bones.

“You are upset.” Tsu’tey notes, shuffling a little closer to you on his knees as you retreat.

“No, no, everything is fine,” You’re insisting, visibly unsteady on your feet as you totter around. “I don’t know why you’re here.”

It shouldn’t be cute, but Tsu’tey is coming to admit to himself that he finds everything about you unnervingly endearing. He watches as you struggle to straighten out your rumpled little clothes, admiring the way the thin fabric clings to you. You look embarrassed and a little self-conscious, as though he’s caught you out.

“I was waiting for you,” He murmurs, reaching for you again. He keeps his hands slow, as though approaching a wounded nantang. You’re such a jittery little thing, but you don’t pull away this time, allowing him to place a hand carefully on your hip. “You did not come to see me today.”

“I figured you’d be busy.” You say, your tone snippy and a bit bratty. “Thought you’d go and hang out with Saeyla today.”

Tsu’tey stares at you. What does Saeyla have to do with this? Is this why you are so upset?

“Syulang,” He murmurs, foregoing his usual nickname for you for a much softer one. “You always have much to say. Please talk to me. I am not understanding why you are angry with me.”

For a moment, he thinks that you aren’t going to speak to him at all. But then you grip your little cup of wine and raise it to your lips, drinking one deep gulp before looking at him in the eye with fiery determination.

“I’m embarrassed,” You snap. “I’ve been basically throwing myself at you for months now, so excuse me if my ego is a little bit bruised. The least you could have done would be to let me down gently instead of letting me embarrass myself in front of everyone—”

Tsu’tey goggles at you, hardly able to believe what you’re saying. “Tawtute—”

“No,” You interrupt sharply, pointing your finger towards him. “Don’t. You said I could talk now.”

Tsu'tey falls obediently silent. His tail curls around his thigh; he’s a little surprised by the way he physically reacts to your sharp tone. He’s never heard you sound so firm before.

“I’ve been—I’ve been wearing all that silly makeup, and wearing all those skimpy tight clothes because I thought you’d look at me more!” You continue, your voice trembling a little. “I’ve been following you around like a pathetic puppy, and sitting in your lap at dinnertime, and holding your hand, and—and—”

You’ve been hoping for him to look at you more? Couldn’t you tell that all he ever did was look at you?

“And then you just tell me that I’m not attractive, and you toss me out of your lap, and tell me that we’re just friends, and you tell me right to my face that you’re going off to sleep with your ex-girlfriend—”

Tsu’tey sputters so hard at that that he nearly spits, horrified.

“I never—” He starts, his eyes wide as his tail curls under his legs, his ears pinning back.

“You did!” You burst out, teary-eyed. “When I was practically naked in front of you, I waited for you to say something, to give any sort of indication that you might like what you were seeing, but you just glared at me and said nothing at all!”

Ah. Tsu’tey has never hated his resting scowl as much as he does in this moment.

“And then yesterday! You said we’re just friends, then you threw me off your lap, and then you said you were going to Saeyla’s kelku right after walking me home—” You continue, beginning to really work yourself up.

“No!” Tsu’tey blurts, reaching out and grabbing at your hand. His blue palm engulfs your much smaller one, and he holds it as delicately as he can. “No, you have misunderstood, syulang.”

“God, I don’t even know why I like you,” You sniffle. “You’re so rude.”

“But you do,” Tsu’tey murmurs, his eyes still wide at the sheer novelty of it. “You like me. You cannot take it back now.”

“Oh, you’re such a dick,” You hiss, yanking your hand out of his. “Did you come here just to rub this in my face—”

“I threw you out of my lap because you were sitting on my cock and I didn’t want you to notice how hard you made me.” The words escape Tsu’tey’s mouth before he can think about it, but you finally fall silent.

 You look a little stunned, actually, and Tsu’tey figures that he’d better start talking quickly before you come back to yourself and remember that you’re angry with him.

He pulls your cup out of your hand and raises it to his mouth, draining the wine in it himself in an effort to cultivate some liquid bravery. The taste bursts sharp and syrupy across his tongue. Of course, he thinks as he licks a dark drop from his lip, you would favour the cloying sweet wine. It suits you.

“Syulang, pretty girl, I do not like when you are upset.” He murmurs, shuffling closer on his knees. You don’t pull away, watching him come and allowing him to rest his hands on your hips. “Please listen.”

You’re still gaping at him, clearly a little thrown off by him stealing your wine from you. He takes advantage of your momentary silence by launching into his explanation. He hardly knows where to begin, but he decides to start with the most heinous accusation.

“I have never been intimate with Saeyla,” He murmurs, his thumbs stroking over your hips. “Never, tawtute. I have not been intimate with anyone in a very long time.”

Your throat bobs a little nervously, but you don’t interrupt.

“I have been taken with you for many, many months now,” He admits, and his ears flatten a little in embarrassment. He is not used to discussing his feelings, and it feels unnervingly vulnerable. “I know that I am grumpy, and rude, and I do not always express myself well. I have never been good at talking, and I can be too arrogant for my own good—”

You breathe out a shaky laugh and sway a step closer, as though you’re hardly aware what you’re doing. Tsu’tey’s grip tightens carefully on your hips, his breath catching in his chest as he urges you closer yet again.

“I have been so full of desire that it has been difficult to think,” He confesses in a low whisper. “It has been humiliating. I had thought— I did not want to scare you—”

He never gets a chance to finish his explanation. He’s partway through his sentence when you launch yourself into his arms, and he cuts himself off in favour of wrapping his arms around you to stop you from bowling the two of you over.

You start kissing his face all over, peppering eager little butterfly kisses all over the tanhì across his forehead and cheeks and all over his flat nose. He can’t help the delighted rumble that’s ripped out of his chest at the display of affection, and he tries to follow your lips with his face when you start to pull away.

“You’re so stupid,” You whisper, and Tsu’tey is so pleased that you’re smiling again that he doesn’t even feel offended about that. “I’ve been jumping in your lap and holding your hand every chance I’ve gotten. I took my clothes off and sunbathed practically naked with you, and showed you my tits—”

“I thought we were being friends.” He says thickly, leaning forward again in the hopes that you’ll give him another kiss. Even on his knees in front of you as you stand, he is so much larger and bulkier than you; it makes him want to tuck you away and keep you safe forever.

You groan, tilting your head back as though you’re in pain. “Tsu’tey. You’re killing me here.”

He can’t resist the temptation of your head tilted back with your throat bared, and leans forward to press his face into the crook of your neck. He rubs his cheek against your pulse point, feeling satisfaction bloom in his stomach as his scent is spread all over the vulnerable skin of your throat.

“I am sorry, syulang,” He murmurs, his lips brushing over your pulse. He feels you shudder against him, and clutches you tighter. “I thought it was obvious how I felt. The whole clan knows. Do you not see how they watch us?”

The laugh that leaves your mouth is a little thready, and your hands come to rest on Tsu’tey’s shoulders for balance as he nuzzles into your shoulder.

“I thought they were looking at me,” You whispered. “Because I was so obvious about how I liked you.”

Tsu’tey shakes his head, trying to hide the silly grin on his face into your soft shoulder. You like him. All of those months of ridiculous pining and yearning and humiliating stifled desire, only to find out that you desired him too.

“So…” You whisper, and he can hear the smile in your voice. “So, you did like my piercings, then?”

Tsu’tey groans, his fingers spreading wide over your back as he pulls you closer. You’re so much smaller than him that his hand spans almost the whole width of your back, and his heartrate picks up as he feels your soft body press into him.

“Yes,” He murmurs, his ears pinning back in muted shame at the admission. “I liked them.”

The smile that breaks over your face at that is almost blinding, and he’s surprised by your enthusiasm when you grab at his jaw and haul his face closer so that you can capture his lips with your own.

The fact that he’s kissing you nearly stalls his brain, but then he feels the softness of your lips and the wet heat of your tongue, and it feels as though his nerves are set alight. He grunts, using the hand on your back to hold you close against him as he kisses you back eagerly.

He’s trying to be as cautious as possible, worried about hurting you, but you don’t seem to share his concern. In fact, your fervor surprises him. You push at his shoulders, and though you’re not strong enough to shift him he follows your unspoken order anyway, until you’ve guided him all the way back to your bed.

He gasps, his vision going a little blurry as you begin trailing kisses along his jaw. He grabs at the mask to take a few clumsy breaths of air, his body hot and tense as you kiss him.

“Bed,” You breathe, pushing at his shoulders. “Get on the bed.”

“Tawtute,” He says, swallowing thickly. “Should we— do you wish to take this slow?”

You pause then, pulling back a little so that you can level him with a look. He’s always found your strange little face difficult to read, but even he can tell that you look decidedly unimpressed right now.

“You think I want to take this slow?” You repeat, nose crinkling. But then your expression grows a little unsure, and you start to pull away. “Oh. Do you want to take this slow?”

“No.” Tsu’tey says, far too quickly.

The two of you just look at each for a moment, blinking. Then Tsu’tey stands, his knees slightly wobbly after kneeling before you for so long, and sinks down onto your bed. It’s a tight fit, the bulk of his body hunching forward slightly as his knees bunch up, but his slight discomfort is forgotten immediately when you climb up into his lap.

Over the last few months, you have sat in his lap many times. This time is different – this time, you’re straddling his crotch, your lovely thighs bracketing his hips as your soft bottom rests over his cock. You’re still kissing him, your soft lips trailing all over his jawline then up to his mouth again, swallowing the appreciative grunts that pour from his mouth.

When he had imagined this, often late at night with his cock in his hand, he had pictured you soft and eager and sweet – and you are all of those things, but nothing could ever have prepared him for how hungry you are, how impatient and greedy you are as you push him back onto your bed and follow him down. Your bodies are pressed so tight together that there’s hardly an inch of air, yet you seem determined to wriggle even closer.

Tsu’tey moans quietly, leaning back among your threadbare pillows as you do your best to devour him. Your mouth is small, but you happily open it wide as you lick into his mouth, your little tongue tracing over his sharp canines in a way that makes him shiver.

“Can’t believe we had this conversation when I’m in my fucking pajamas,” You murmur into his mouth, pressing your soft fabric-covered tits against his wide chest. “I wanted to be wearing something sexy for this.”

All he can do is close his eyes against the onslaught of your lips and teeth on the exposed skin of his neck. Your small hands smooth over the planes of his chest, hot and possessive as they crawl over the front of his body.

“You are very beautiful, syulang.” Tsu’tey breathes, his hands finding a firm hold on your waist as your weight settles over him.

Then you grind down, and he’s already so aroused but now he can feel the heat of your pussy through those tiny damn shorts of yours and the noise that’s torn from his chest is completely undignified.

He grabs at you. It’s rough and presumptuous and honestly Tsu’tey isn’t even sure it’s a conscious decision, but before he knows it he’s grabbed you by the waist and is pulling you down to grind against his cock.

“Fuck,” You gasp, and Tsu’tey nearly loses it. “Oh god.”

You shuffle back a little, and Tsu’tey nearly audibly whines when he loses that glorious friction over his cock. But it turns out that you’ve only moved so that you have access to his loincloth, which you promptly begin to pull at.

“Mawey, yawntutsyìp.” He croaks out, though he’s already flexing his hips to help you pull his tewng off.

“Been wanting this for ages, you have no idea—”

Tsu’tey swears his head is spinning at the sheer irony of that, because he could have been experiencing this for ages?

His cock is freed from his tewng, slapping against his stomach with an embarrassingly loud smack. When you see how big he is, your eyes widen, and Tsu’tey has a horrible moment of panic where he worries that you’re going to change your mind. He would only be able to accept that choice, but he already knows that it will leave him with the worst case of blue balls he’d ever experienced.

But you don’t let his no doubt intimidating size stop you from reaching out with your small hands to stroke him. A guttural growl is pulled from him, and he tilts his head back against your soft bedding and bites hard at his lip in an effort to control himself as you stroke at him.

“Oh, fuck yes.” You breathe, your expression nothing short of delighted as you stare down at him. He feels vulnerable under your gaze, naked in a way that has nothing to do with the fact that you’ve pulled his tewng off him.

He reaches out, tugs at your top. “I wish to see you, again.”

That makes you smile. The little fabric top you’re wearing is so thin that he can see the outline of your breasts and little nipples already, and as you lean forward to tug at his cock it gapes open at the chest to give him a tantalising glimpse of your bare flesh, but it’s not enough. He wants to see you bare and wanting beneath him. Or on top of him. He’s not fussy.

When you pull your flimsy little fabric covering off, Tsu’tey feels as though he goes momentarily light-headed as his blood rushes south. He’s seen you like this before, that day at the river, but this is different. This time, he’s allowed to touch.

You’re as soft as he’d imagined – softer, even. Tsu’tey’s hands are eager, reaching up to grope and feel, and you tilt your head back and moan softly as he kneads at your delightfully squishy breasts. He just can’t get over how perfect and pliable you are, your supple skin moulding and giving around his hands. He’s never experienced anyone as soft as you; the Na’vi are bigger than the Sky People, and stronger too. His people do not have the same shape, are not soft in the same places as humans. And he’s never thought too much about it, but now he feels like he’s losing himself in your supple flesh.

And then there’s the delicate little barbells in your nipples. Tsu’tey stares, wanting so badly to touch but nervous about going too hard or fast and accidentally hurting you.

“Remember I said they were just to look good?” You breathe, pressing forward a little to encourage his hands to roam over your tits.

“Mm.” Tsu’tey grunts mindlessly. He does recall something of the sort, but he doesn’t think it is fair that you expect him to think when he has your tits in his hands like this, one hand almost spanning your entire chest.

“I lied,” You whisper, your lips curving up in a smile so cheeky that it makes Tsu’tey’s toes curl. “They feel good, too.”

Tsu’tey groans, running his fingers slowly across your skin before finally touching the piercings, his touch smooth and warm.

A low moan of contentment escapes him. "Soft skin. Pretty piercings."

His hands cup your breasts as his thumbs brush over your nipples. You were telling the truth about them; the piercings make you sensitive, and when you shiver under his hands, his gaze darkens.

"I want them in my mouth." He says suddenly, his voice rough and gravelly. His thumbs swipe over them yet again, and he looks up eagerly to you to wait for your permission as you sigh.

You laugh, though it's a breathless and weak sort of a thing. You’re trying to play it cool and casual, but Tsu’tey is holding your soft little breasts in his hands – he can feel your rapid heartbeat against his palm. "Go on, then."

He doesn't waste any time before he's bending his head and pressing harsh, biting kisses all along your chest. Then, getting sick of bending his neck down, he grabs at the flesh of your ass and hauls you up into his arms so that he can mouth at your nipples in earnest.

He licks over your left breast, feeling the little metal barbell against his tongue. It must feel good because you whine, arching your back and pushing your tits into his face even more. Your skin is so soft and sensitive, and it makes his rough tongue and big hands feel clumsy and coarse.

He wraps his lips around your nipple and suckles at it, his tongue playing with the strange little balls at the end of the bars. The metal is cool against his tongue, offering a pleasant contrast to your heated flesh.

“Ungh, shit,” You gasp, your little hands winding into his braids and gripping him there. “Tsu’tey… I wanna suck your cock.”

Tsu’tey freezes, his eyes going wide. Those words rock through him like a physical punch, and he groans as his cock visibly twitches against his stomach. He knows you can feel it, considering you’re still straddling him, and you begin to wiggle your way back as you try to get your face down to his crotch.

But as soon as you get your little hand on his cock, panic shoots through him. It feels good, so good, but he’s sure if you actually put it in your mouth he’ll die. He already knows that if you get your mouth on him everything will be over far too quickly, and he’s not ready to tap out just yet.

He grabs you and rolls, until you’re on your back staring up at him with a surprised little pout.

“I want that, tawtute,” He admits, his voice coming out in a gravelly rumble as he presses a careful kiss to your pouting lips. “But later.”

“But—”

He doesn’t let you finish. He’s too busy kissing your strange, alien little face, then down over your throat. You’re so addictive already. He wants to fuck you and have the whole clan listen, he wants to suck on your tits and have you crying, he wants to play with your clit until it’s puffy and swollen, he wants to play with your cute little hole, he wants to see you bouncing on his cock, on your hands and knees… He feels like he’s been set alight with desire, like the blood in his veins has turned molten.

His fingers hook into your little shorts and pull at them, and you lift your hips to help him tug them off. To his delight, you’re not wearing your tiny little fabric covering under them, and his tail whips in excitement at the sight of you bare beneath him.

“Oh,” He breathes, shuffling himself down your bed. It’s a narrow fit, and cramped, but Tsu’tey doesn’t care; his attention is fixed on you and the way your legs are spreading to accommodate the bulk of his body.

He takes in the sight of you eagerly, bare and glistening wet, and grinding against nothing, and he realises in that moment that his imagination could never have lived up to reality.

“I’m going to take care of you,” He mumbles mindlessly, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to your lovely plush inner thigh. “Going to make you feel so good, syulang.”

“Okay.” You sigh, the word coming out a little wobbly.

Tsu’tey’s tail whips from side-to-side as he gazes at your bare cunt, still hardly able to believe that you’re giving him access to you like this, that you like him too. It feels too good to be true, but Tsu’tey is not about to let this opportunity to pass him by.

“So pretty, yawntutsyìp.” He kisses his words flatly against your puffy lips before coaxing them open with his flat nose. His face is covered in you already, glistening across his lips and chin. But it’s not enough, it won’t be enough until he’s drowning in you.

You taste tangy and sweet, a heady mix of sweat and pheromones that pulls him in ever closer, desperate to drink his fill of you.

But even better than how you taste, is how you react.

You’re up on him so fast he barely has time to blink – no sooner has he laid his lips on your pussy, his mouth so big that it almost swallows you whole, than your hips are bucking up into his face. All he can smell and taste is you, and you’re so fucking wet and suddenly you’re rutting up against his face, not even caring if Tsu’tey’s mouth is open or not, as though you’re so desperate for him that all you can do is use him.

It’s the best day of Tsu’tey’s life. He’s going to mark this day and religiously celebrate it every year.

“Tsu’tey –!” You gasp, rutting your hips into his face. A wild, somewhat unhinged part of him hopes you break his nose. He uses his tongue against your clit and lets you rub yourself all over him, making his brain feel so blissfully empty.

He just moans into you, his hands wrapping around your plush hips and gripping at your squishy little bottom for leverage as he pulls you back against his face. He suckles at you so eagerly, tongue laving over your hole, over and over and over, delighting in the way you gasp and moan and grind into his mouth.

His tail coils as his arousal pulses, forgetting himself as his fingers clench into your soft skin. You sigh, and drop your head back against the pillows as you move your hips to push your pussy back against his tongue. When he spears his tongue into you, you whine, but the sound is muffled somehow—

You’ve bitten your pillow, Tsu’tey realises, and groans. He wants so badly to get his hands on himself, to stroke and tug at his cock as he devours you, but he can’t bring himself to let go of you. He feels as though he’ll die if he lets go of your squishy ass, and his fingers knead insistently at it as he dines on your cunt.

He fucks his tongue into you harder, mouth open and jaw aching in the most satisfying way. It’s all worth it when Tsu’tey realises that you’re crying, just softly, your moans and whines wet, your breaths choked.

Tsu’tey’s fingers find their way to rest against your pussy, pushing in gently when he’s satisfied with how well his tongue worked you open. Once the digits are wet, he pushes two in to the first knuckle. He groans at the feeling of how welcoming your pussy is, how responsive you are to his touch. You cry out, your thighs twitching as he stretches you out.

Your whimpering makes him feel bold, his cock weeping against his thigh. He’s harder than he’s ever been in his life, the frustrating ache in his balls is poured right into the quickening pace of his fingers. He wants you to break— to crumble into pieces just so he can put you back together.

“Tsu’tey,” You slur out, your fingers gripping at his braids as you writhe under his attention. “Need to slow down, or I’m gonna—I’m gonna come—”

Your words fall on deaf ears; Tsu’tey is practically hypnotised by your little whimpers and cries as he sucks and licks eagerly at your squishy wet pussy, his fingers twisting and rubbing all along your hot, clutching insides. He feels desperate to experience you come against his tongue, and his movements take on an edge of fervor as he opens his mouth wide to suck your whole cunt into his mouth.

You squeal, hips bucking, and your feet kick out until they’ve landed on his shoulders. Tsu’tey moans, pleased by your reaction, and his mouth seals firmly around you as his tongue laps at your clit.

Your thighs suddenly clench around his head, keeping it in place, and he increases his pace, keeping it rhythmic for you. He buries his nose into your little swollen clit, letting out a hungry little noise as he sucks at you.

And then you’re gasping, the line of your body going taut and stiff as your orgasm rolls through you. Tsu’tey doesn’t relent, sucking and licking at you as you tremble and shake apart. Your release tastes so sweet, like hot syrup on his tongue, and he can’t get enough of you. Your thighs grip his head so hard that the muscles tremble, and he relishes the pressure of your legs squeezing around his skull.

It doesn’t take long before your legs are kicking again, wheezing as you grow oversensitive and push at his head. With great reluctance, Tsu’tey pulls his mouth away with a wet ‘pop’, licking his lips before leaning in to suckle a series of biting kisses around your inner thighs.

He feels a little light-headed, still so hungry. He knows his eyes are heavy-lidded with his own arousal, his whole body throbbing with the need to take you, but he’s trying so damn hard to control himself.

“Oh god… fuck.” You breathe, staring wide-eyed at the ceiling.

That certainly strokes Tsu’tey’s male pride, and he looks up at you with a pleased, if slightly dazed, smile. He’s breathing heavily still from having devoted his entire attention to pleasing you and forgetting to breathe, and it takes a moment for him to realise he needs to sip from the stupid mask. He fumbles for a moment, grabbing at it and taking several deep breaths before dropping it again and leaning up to kiss at your cute little lower belly.

“It was good?” He asks. Judging by the look on your face he knows the answer, but he can’t help but want to hear it straight from your mouth.

You laugh, a little disbelievingly, then place a hand onto his chest and push lightly at him until he’s rolling over onto his back. You follow, swinging your leg over his hips and settling down so that your spit-slick pussy is nestled right up against his hard cock.

“So good,” You whisper, and it practically comes out like a purr. “So fucking good.”

Tsu’tey’s tail curls and his ears fold back, his stomach swooping in anticipation at the coy tone of your voice. His cock twitches too, very interested in the way you’re sitting on it. When you rock your hips lightly, allowing your slick pussy to glide along his length, he groans breathily before reaching to grab at your waist, trying to hold you still.

“Wait, syulang.” He says, his voice coming out embarrassingly hoarse. “You are so small, I don’t want to hurt you.”

He’s not expecting you to laugh at that, as though he’s said something that you find adorable. You lean in and kiss him, your lips soft against his hot, swollen ones.

“You’re not the first Na’vi I’ve had,” You whisper against his mouth, giving him yet another sweet kiss. “I know what I’m doing.”

He bristles at the thought of another Na’vi hunching over your little body, rutting into your hot wet softness. His hands tighten around your waist as a bolt of possessive jealousy flashes through him.

“Who?” He demands, his face scrunching up in a scowl.

You just giggle, leaning down to kiss the wide bridge of his nose. Tsu’tey’s ears fold down, a little mollified by how cute you are, though his scowl doesn’t lessen much. Your hand runs over his chest, your fingers stroking over his heated skin.

“Oh, shush.” You say with a fond smile, as though you think he’s joking. “What, did you expect me live like a nun while you were ignoring me all that time? I didn’t even think you liked me.”

Tsu’tey doesn’t know what a nun is, but he’s distracted before he can ask. You lean down slowly, running the tip of your tongue along his throat. You pause to bite him gently right where his vein pulses, and the rush of sensations from your touch nearly sends him spiraling.

“Besides,” You whisper, “I feel like you just sucked my soul out through my pussy, so I really don’t think anyone else is ever going to compare.”

The purr that your words pull out of him at that is embarrassing, but his body reacts before his brain does. Yes, he thinks smugly, I am better. It feels incredibly important to him that you know he is the best option, the man that can please you best.

Tsu’tey feels like he’s melting under you. The heat of your bare slick cunt against the length of his cock is fanning a fire in his blood. He bites at his lip as he feels your lips on his pulse, harder now, kissing softly, tongue flicking against the skin.

Your hand slides lower, and then finally your hand wraps around the base of his cock. He groans, bucks up, but didn’t mean to. Thankfully you just laugh, obviously amused as you’re lifted up by the momentum of his hips.

 “Tsu’tey, baby,” You whisper, and oh, your voice is going to drive him insane. “Does it hurt, being this hard?”

Tsu’tey openly chokes, and you give him one slow stroke. The feeling of your small soft hand against him has his mind blanking entirely for a second. You pause to rub your thumb under his cockhead, against the bundle of nerves there, and Tsu’tey moans as his eyes flutter shut.

“Pretty boy,” You whisper, and Tsu’tey gasps, feeling his lip quiver. He cracks his eyes open, just to see you smiling down at him. “Do you like when I call you pretty?”

Tsu’tey looks away and says nothing – but you just giggle.

“You’re pouting, Tsu’tey.”

“I am not.” He grumbles, though his cheeks are uncomfortably warm.

Your hands move, one stroking around his cock, the other cradling his balls. Tsu’tey arches, pushes into your hand as you twist your fist around his glans. His mouth falls open, a breathy moan escaping, and you visibly shiver. He tries to push himself up on his elbows so that he can watch as you shift atop him, hips rocking forward gently as you stroke at him.

“Syulang,” He manages, licking at his lips as his voice comes out all breathy and desperate. “Please.”

You grin at him, your eyes soft and affectionate as you watch him disintegrate beneath your touch. Then you’re lifting up onto your knees, using his chest as leverage, and Tsu’tey holds his breath as you position yourself over his cock.

“Breathe, baby.” You laugh, taking his mask and holding it up to his face.

He takes several deep breaths, feels the blurred edges of his mind sharpen, and reaches down to grab his cock. He helps you to position it, his cockhead gliding along your slick folds.

He has to pause for a moment, closing his eyes as his ears flatten back against his head. You’re so damn soft, your cunt is so hot and sticky wet, and he already knows that the moment his cock pushes inside of you he’ll be fighting for his life not to come instantly. He just wants to last long enough to please you, to make you feel good.

You let out a soft noise, your hips twitching as you try to hump your pussy back onto his cock. He has to grab your hips to keep you still, grunting.

“You’re teasing.” You whine, clutching at his arms as you try to wiggle your way back onto him.

“Mph.” Tsu’tey grunts, squeezing his eyes shut as he tries to contain himself. “Mawey, syulang. Patience.”

But patience doesn’t seem to be your strong suit. Your bright eyes have gone dark, pupils blown, forehead glimmering with sweat – you look beautiful, and Tsu’tey feels like he’s dying.

You lean forward and crash your mouth into his, kissing him hard and messy as you wriggle in his lap, trying to coax his cock inside you. Tsu’tey moans into your mouth, but then you’re pulling back, and your lips press against his nose, his cheeks, his forehead.

Still breathing deeply, Tsu’tey aligns his cock against your pussy, and at the same time as his sweet girl peppers his face with kisses, he begins to push inside. You whine at the pressure of the stretch, your forehead pressed against his as he presses his cock into you slowly, as slowly as he can manage.

“Come on,” You groan, leaning forward and letting your blunt little teeth scrape over the sensitive tip of his ear. “Put it in, put it in, put it in—”

“Calm,” Tsu’tey gasps, clutching at your plush little hips in an effort to keep you from slamming yourself down on him all at once. “Calm, yawntutsyìp, I do not wish to hurt you—”

But his words are lost when you shift over him right as he begins to press into you again, and from one second to the next he slides half-way inside, past the small ring of resistance and into the velvety hot inside of your cunt.

It’s like a gut punch.

He moans like a dying man and holds you as tight as he can in an attempt to ground himself enough not to start thrusting. You gasp, your features scrunching into a pained wince as you’re split wide around the thickness of his cock. He doesn’t need you to vocalise your discomfort, so he rubs your puffy clit to try and make it better for you. His calloused thumb rubs slow circles on it at the same time as you bury your face in the crook of his neck, panting and whimpering. 

Fuck, he needs to move.

Just a bit –

Just to take the edge off –

His hips pull back and then quickly snap forward again. “Fuck.”

It’s so easy it’s sinful. He pushes through the tightest cunt he has ever been in and it feels like home. He groans roughly, his arms wrapping around your waist as he tries to catch his breath. He can’t help but look down, and he almost whimpers at the sight of your cunt stretched wide around his thick length, at the aborted little twitching of your hips as you try admirably hard to take him in deeper. You’re so much tighter than he expected, and it takes everything in him to pull back again.

When he withdraws, your pussy grips him all the way to the tip, making him feel so insane he had to immediately dive back in, gasping. He’s too big to fit inside of you completely, but that’s okay; your tiny pussy grips hard enough at the length that you can take that Tsu’tey feels like he’s about to black out.

“Yes!” You cry out, arching your chest against his so that he can feel the cool sensation of your piercings against his skin, your fingers knotting into his braids as you lift yourself up then down on his cock, meeting his sloppy thrusts.

Tsu’tey feels as though the world is fracturing around him as he pushes himself into your tiny little cunt, feeling your pussy clench around his cock like a fist. It's so tight and sweet, his dick feels as though it's being pulled into paradise.

Being inside you is heavenly; it’s like your sweet little pussy is made for him, molding to him and stretching where it needs to, squeezing him tight to the point of pain. He pistons in and out of you from below, finding his own pace as the bed shakes from the force of his thrusts. You make soft, wet little sounds, a wanton creature in response in response as you undulate atop of him.

Your tits bounce every time he thrusts up into you, and he finds his eyes glued to sight before his self-control cracks and he’s leaning forward to take one of your breasts into his mouth. It takes a bit of contortion, his spine curving as his mouth locks around your tit, his tongue rolling against your little pierced nipple, his ears wiggling eagerly as they pick up your little mewls.

Oh, he’s not going to last long; he already feels like he’s losing his mind.

Soft, desperate little noises are babbling out of your mouth as you fuck yourself down on his cock, clutching at his shoulders for balance. Your jaw is slack and your mouth is open, and Tsu’tey can see flashes of your little pink tongue as you gasp and whimper everytime he rolls his hips up into you. Your movements have taken on an edge of desperation as you ride him, your pussy squeezing him so tight his vision is going blurry.

Then your little body is seizing, weak gasping moans spilling from your lips as your spine goes stiff. Your cunt clenches in sporadic little pulses, and Tsu’tey nearly roars at the intensity of it – your pussy sucks so tight that it almost hurts. It’s a weaker orgasm than your first one, but you still sob your way through it as you clutch at him.

“Oh, syulang, fuck.” Tsu’tey grits out, the human curse word sounding coarse and foreign on his tongue.

He wants to do this forever, to stay buried in you all night, but you’re sucking him in and clinging to him in a vice grip as you push back against him, and he’s about to explode. He’s overwrought, grunting against your sweat-damp skin as he clutches your soft little body close to him, the motion of his hips turning jerky and sloppy as he feels that tingly pressure grow in his stomach.

He lifts you off his cock with a cut-off snarl, grabbing at his cock with a clumsy hand as that pressure bubbles over. He comes with more force than he had been expecting, his come spurting out onto your belly and over your tits, dripping steadily over your smooth skin.

Part of him is a little embarrassed about how quickly he had come, but the larger part of him feels it was impressive that he didn’t spill the instant he got his cock inside of you. But you’re pouting up at him, clutching at his chest as you push back against him.

“No,” You whine, your voice quiet and tired as you try to grind your messy pussy back onto him. “Wanted you to come inside.”

Tsu’tey is already breathless, but the sweet little whimper in your voice nearly knocks him flat yet again. His cock is still throbbing, the last few drops of his release spurting out and glowing lightly against your skin. He takes in the sight of his seed spattered across your pretty little body greedily, committing it to memory. Nothing in his raunchiest wet dreams could have compared to the reality of this moment.

“We will have time for that, yawntutsyìp,” He whispers, his stomach clenching in excitement at the thought. “You will not need another man again.”

You grumble lightly, but he can see the satisfied little smile on your face as you go limp in his arms, burrowing closer to his chest as you collapse down next to him. Having you in his arms feels perfect; his tail curls in satisfaction when he realises how perfectly you fit against his chest, and he purrs smugly as he nudges his nose against your temple.

He rolls, scooping you up and arranging you so that you’re laying sprawled at his side, before curving his body around yours and wrapping an arm around your little body. Your body is still glistening with sweat and the dimly bioluminescent streaks of come that Tsu’tey has left on you – he’s torn between the urge to care for you, to clean you up and make sure that you’re sated and pleased, and to leave you marked and carrying his scent.

He’ll clean you up in a few minutes, he decides, allowing himself to enjoy the sight of you after being thoroughly claimed for a little while longer.

“If you ever say we’re just friends again I’ll kick your ass.” You mumble, pressing your face into his pectoral muscles.

You’re acting as though your bones have been dissolved into jelly, laying all limp and pliable against him even as you squirm closer. Tsu’tey allows himself to just stare at you, admiring all the subtle little bite-marks and bruising that he can’t remember leaving behind, admiring your puffy nipples and your still gooey cunt.

“Mm.” Tsu’tey hums, dipping his head down and laying it carefully on your chest. He’s a little nervous that he’ll be too heavy, but your small hands come up to tangle in his braids and scratch soothingly at his scalp. He allows his eyes to flutter shut, enjoying the plush softness of your breasts under his face.

“I like you very much, syulang.” He says, enjoying the pulse of your heartbeat beneath his head. “I am sorry that I have been slow to understand your interest.”

You laugh a little sleepily, craning your neck so that you can kiss his forehead before laying back again. “You certainly did a good job showing me your interest just now.”

“I will do more,” Tsu’tey promises, hardly even aware of what he’s saying. “I will collect kllpxiwll berries for you everyday, and go swimming as often as you like, and make you pretty jewelry, and keep you satisfied—”

You start to laugh before he even finishes.

“Who would’ve known a big grumpy asshole like you is capable of being so romantic.” You snicker as he nuzzles into your tits.

Your lack of a tail and blunt ears make it hard for him to read you, but he can tell by your tone of voice that you’re teasing him. He just curls around you, not minding at all. He enjoys the thought of proving to you exactly how romantic he can be – he has much to prove, and much to make up for.

“I am not grumpy now.” He mutters, turning his face so that it’s buried neatly in between your tits. He licks lazily over your left breast, savouring the feeling of the little silver barbell nestled in your nipple against his tongue.

You shiver, a soft little overwhelmed gasp escaping your lips as he kisses leisurely at your puffy and oversensitive nipples.

“No,” You murmur, and he can hear the fondness in your voice. “You’re not.”

Tsu’tey purrs, his whole body curving around you as he kisses absent-mindedly at your tits, his thoughts pleasantly hazy and somewhat nebulous.

“Breathe.” You remind him tiredly, your voice a little slurred around the edges with sleep.

Upon your urging, he lifts the stupid mask back up to his face and fits it clumsily over his mouth and nose. He wraps his arm around your waist, holds you tight, and just breathes as the two of you lay together, sated and satisfied.

#tsu'tey #tsu'tey x human reader #tsu'tey x reader #avatar wotw #avatar x reader #avatar 2009 #na'vi x reader #na'vi x human reader #terato #alien x reader #fics

[hannieehaee]

18 + / mdi

content: pantysniffer!mingyu, pervert!mingyu, the unexpected return of this mingyu, established relationship, smut, afab reader, oral (f receiving), face-sitting, etc.

part 1

wc: 1384

a/n: i randomly thought abt a continuation to that one mingyu fic i wrote like a month ago and now here we are

masterlist

you thought he would've been done with this by now. i mean, you were dating; exclusively. you had been dating for about a month, so it was quite strange for mingyu to still have this habit.

when you'd first met your boyfriend, you had only been roommates. he was clean, he kept things tidy, he was respectful of your space, and most important of all, he was really hot.

you hadn't known him very well until first moving into his shared apartment, only having ever heard your best friend vernon mention him in passing. which wad why you were in utter shock upon moving in with vernon and mingyu, now realizing that your best friend had been gatekeeping this muscly hunk from you.

admittedly, you had a bit of a crush on him, but you were an adult and you also appreciated the friendship you had quickly built with mingyu, deciding to not act on anything, or even give off any type of hint of your school-girl crush on him. this platonic dynamic, however, did not last long. but its demise was not your doing.

it all started some random afternoon, in which you had headed over to take a shower at the usual time you tended to. having roommates, it was just easier to have a schedule, so you'd always abide by it. except today's routine was quickly interrupted by the unexpected sighting of your panties in mingyu's hand, pressed against his nose while he breathed in the scent. you had only wanted to ask him for extra conditioner, not bothering to knock on his door (your bad), but absolutely not expecting to find the culprit to all your misplaced panties from the past month.

like any reasonable girl, this interaction ended with you letting mingyu fuck you into next week, but only after being thoroughly eaten out by the man as he lost himself between your legs. in very predictable fashion, this resulted in a relationship arising between the two of you, immediately informing your friend vernon that he would now have to third wheel as the three of you continued to be roommates.

you had thought that was the last of it. the last time mingyu would let his depraved tendencies thief you of yet another pair of panties. i mean, he had the real thing now, so there was no need for a washed out scent of your cunt for him to get off to, right? wrong. you had forgotten your boyfriend was obsessed with you, and by result, the lacy panties he knew you wore day after day.

that's why it shouldn't have been surprising when you walked into his room (which was pretty much yours by now) to find him in the same position you had a month before. you wanted to be scandalized, but much like last time, you were incredibly turned on at the thought of mingyu being so addicted to you he'd seek your panties if he couldn't have you immediately.

he noticed your arrival, not stopping his movements even as you neared him, closing the door behind you.

"baby ... left me all alone. 'm sorry, just needed you so fucking bad ..." his movements on his dick sped up, whining and pouting at you for fulfilling your adult duties and leaving him on his day off to go to work.

"gyu ... baby. wanted me that bad? couldn't wait for me to get back?", you were close enough now to caress his cheek, making him lean into your hand as he moaned at your condescending tone.

"mhm," he nodded, "can i have it? want the real thing, baby. wanna drown in it."

"how can i say no to you, pretty? c'mere, let me-"

"my face! sit on my face, baby, please!", it wasn't too common for him to beg for you, only ever happening when he was overly pussydrunk for you, so you were taken aback for a moment.

surprisingly, you had never sat on his face to date, despite his constant insistence on eating you out almost every day that allowed for it. to be fair, you two worked a lot, and had only been dating for a month. there hadn't been enough time to explore more positions or even explore each other as much as you'd want to.

"gyu? are you sure? what if i-"

"its fine!", he was suddenly not as dizzy from the arousal the scent of your panties had given him, all focus now on the thought of your thighs encompassing him as he licked at you from below their weight, "i can take it, baby, i promise."

it took a bit of enticing from him to convince you, with him beginning to kiss your neck and sneaking his hand under your shorts to run his fingers up and down your already-wet panties. he succeeded too quickly, knowing you had as little power to resist him as he did you.

and so now you were sitting on his face, worries buried deep in your brain as your boyfriend's tongue delved into the farthest depths of your cunt. you couldn't help yourself in holding onto his hair and begin riding his tongue, too blind on pleasure to even think.

what you hadn't realized was that your boyfriend was off even worse than you, constantly moaning against your cunt while his hand remained occupied on his own dick. he had never felt more turned on, falling in love with the weight of your thighs on his face.

"gyu ... feel so- so fucking good, shit! please ..." you had no idea what you were begging for. there was nothing more mingyu could do to make you feel better than he already was. he had managed to render you senseless, with no coherent thought left in you.

"so fucking good .. shit, so tasty, baby. ride me just like that ..." that was what you could make out of his mumbled words muffled by your cunt, but regardless, knowing he felt pleasure from the simple act of sucking on your clit made you even more aroused.

you began to ride him at an animalistic speed once you realized your orgasm was approaching, face now wet from the tears of pleasure he had pulled from you. mingyu was in no better state, humping his own hand at a similarly inhuman pace, cumming halfway through your own orgasm.

you fell limp on the bed, wearily removing your weight from his face and letting yourself become boneless while he somehow managed to get himself up to get some wet wipes to clean up the mess, but not without attacking your mouth with his tongue for a few seconds before actually getting up, moaning at the whine you let out at your taste on his tongue.

"shit. we have to do that again. we have to do that every time from now on. we-"

"okay, slow down," you giggled as he cleaned you up, "i need to recover. you're crazy, gyu, jesus christ."

"what? is it illegal to love pussy?"

"as much as you do? it should be. also, you're still stealing my panties? gyu, i-"

"listen!" he interrupted you again, now having thrown away the dirty wipes and wordlessly positioning the two of you so you could lay against each other under his covers, "it was an emergency, okay? i was so horny, you have no idea. and your panties were right there! it's like crack, baby. i couldn't help myself. are you mad?", he was pouting by the end of his explanation, paying no mind to how ridiculous he sounded.

"of course not, gyu. it's actually kinda, uh, i-"

"oh my god. you still like it?! you like when i sniff your panties and i'm the perv?", he gasped, now facing you as he berated you.

"shut up! i'm not the one going around sniffing people's panties, okay? you're the perv!"

"nuh uh, baby. can't turn this on me. gonna be stealing your panties even more now. i dont care if i can have the real thing, want both. gonna make you sit on my face every day too. cant even pretend you dont love it anymore," he was smug about it, knowing he was completely right.

"fine. you can steal my panties. happy?"

he dared giggle in response, "very."

#seventeen fanfic #seventeen x reader #seventeen #svt #svt x reader #seventeen imagine #seventeen oneshot #seventeen smut #svt smut #svt fanfic #mingyu x reader #mingyu imagines #mingyu fanfic #mingyu scenario #mingyu smut

[anadiasmount]

what could’ve been - jude bellingham x reader.

quick sum: based on this request! brother bsf! after a heavy international loss, jude can only cope and receive comfort from his bsf little sister in her arms despite someone walking in on them…

wc: 1.7k | masterlist | jude’s masterlist

psa🗣️: WAS SO EXCITED WHEN I RECEIVED THIS!! ik it’s not the longest but still filled with heavy and forbidden touches with jude 😵‍💫🤭 like always hope you enjoy! 🤍

you felt torn apart. feeling limb by limp being swept away as you try to cope with the realization they were kicked out to their deserved semi-finals. you couldn’t hear the commotion around you, feeling drips of water fall on you from some fans angry or happily celebrating, only blinking rapid to see if what happened was real or not.

you sunk into the seat, hands covering your face as you felt the need to be pushed into a dark corner and never come out. you felt pity, remorse and overwhelmed with the sight of your brother and his teammates crouched on the floor or wiping their tears away.

you felt for them. it wasn’t a easy match, one of the heaviest tournaments and going against the winner of the last world cup didn’t help. they had a strong team, they had it in the bag before all hell broke loose. one minute you cheered, then next you were trying to hold the choked sobs your body begged to be let out.

you could only stare around with tearful eyes and a heavy pain in your chest as you looked around the stadium before your eyes finally landed on them. your brother consoling jude who tried to control his tears, hugging each other tight almost afraid to let go.

you stayed in your spot, waiting for your brother to appear and come up to the stands. “i genuinely don’t know what to say,” your mom says quietly. you nod agreeing with you, feeling as she hugged your side and brought her to you. “maybe it’s best we leave him, he’ll come to us like he always does when he’s ready to talk,” you reply, bitting your lip to hold back your tears.

you saw your brother send the three of you a quick wake and kiss, shaking his head in dissatisfaction he didn’t want to speak and wanted to be left alone. jude trailed behind him, locking eyes with yours, feeling a familiarity in your tummy as he gave you a sad smile and wave. you reciprocated the action, seeing him whisper a “thank you for being here.”

you felt the first tear and then the one roll down your cheek onto your england jersey, being pushed away into the tunnel back into a reality you dreaded. you felt pissed and angry at the opposing teams fans who cheered loudly as they walked into the shuttles. earning some laughters or side remarks when all you wanted was to go in a tuck into your sheets.

your brother hadn’t checked in yet, so you’d decided to stay up a bit longer knowing he tended to go on walks after rough loss to clear his head. plus you could also imagine the squad comforting each other, and wanting to be there for everyone. you were grateful for that and their ability of having a brotherhood when it most mattered.

while you could also feel for your brother, you randomly began thinking of jude as well. the defeated and obvious sad look on his face as he processed the match. one of englands most youngest talented players at their first world cup and their luck being this.

you and him had a small history. he often came over a lot when they had time off. during those times when left alone a small friendship was built. either to talk about life, seeking advice, music you commonly shared, or when the group decided to leave both of you out.

you felt the need to distance yourself from him after the unexpected makeout session you had in your bedroom. he was your first kiss and it left a forever mark inside you. you knew it was wrong and the last thing you wanted was your brother cutting a long-standing friendship because of it. jude was hurt, eyes always roaming you when he came over and always trying to speak to you.

from jude:

please let me in.

your eyes immediately went wide when you saw him text you to open the door. frantically looking around when you heard the door knock, you quickly looked in the mirror and took deep breaths. this was the last thing you expected to happen especially tonight. your sweaty hand opened the door revealing a teared eyes jude with his nike tech set on.

you let him in, lips pursed not knowing what to say or even debating to say anything. you shifted your weight from one foot to another, you met his eyes, drowning in the rapidly as they never detached from yours. he let out a deep breath or sigh, eyes fluttering as his voice croaked.

he sat on the edge of the bed taking a deep gulp before speaking. “i didn’t know where else to go…” he looked around the room and his body language was refusing to deny what happened. "jude," you whispered quietly taking a small step. you saw his eyes watery looking at you, "can y-y-you just hold me?"

you immediately rushed to him, his head coming to your stomach as his hands wrapped around you. you let him hold you, hearing his loud sobs muffled as you tried to be strong for him. your hands rubbed the top of his shoulders, the other scratching the nape of his neck to comfort him.

you kneeled to his level, holding his face in your hands as you stroked away his tears, jude refusing to let you go as he controlled his breathing. "we can talk about it if you want? but if a quiet setting is what you need i understand too..." you say, thumb tracing his cheeks.

"can we cuddle on the bed? i think i'm ready to talk about it," jude replies, grabbing your hands and placing kisses all over them. you did as you asked, jude laying on top of you as we spoke for almost an hour about how he felt and how things could've gone differently.

you listened, continuing to hold him stroking his back and scratching to soothe his cries or stutters. you didn't interrupt once, wanting him to have the floor to relieve his pain and let his feelings known. you could hear the frustration, tiredness, anger, and disappointment but overall the sadness in his voice.

after a quick share of words and laughter before jude fell asleep, his arms tightly around you as he slept peacefully. you pushed away any feelings, wanting to be there for him when he most needed it. it didn't matter what happened in the past or how you felt for him, he needed consolation and you were grateful he was here with you.

"what the hell is this?!?!" you struggled to open your eyes, feeling the heavy weight on top of you still. you saw your brother standing, before throwing away the sheets that covered both of you. "y/n i swear to god. you two cant be serious right now!"

"please relax its not what it looks like," you said trying to explain the situation, as you stood up and jude as well. " 'it's not what it looks like' my ass! hes my best friend y/n! and here you guys are together and cuddled it up," your brother winced at the end, pacing back and forth with his fists clenched.

"i came here looking to talk with someone! nothing happened i swear! we ended up falling asleep," jude defended, earning an angry look from your brother. "yeah you on top of here like some sort of couple, explain that."

"you're overreacting! nothing happened, period. he was looking for comfort and wanted to talk about what just happened, we talked just that," you say frustrated, becoming pissed at your brother for making up assumptions. jude looked at you with sorry eyes, for getting you into this mess.

"y/n, you don't understand, he's my best friend-"

"you think i don't know that? i know he is, and you're my brother, you weren't the only one who lost tonight. we gave you the space you asked for, and jude is practically like family, so i will be here for him when he asks," you say, watching your brother scoff and give you a look of denial.

"jude you could've gone anywhere else! why her? my sister?" your brother ignored you, coming close face to face with jude. it stung you, hearing him sound almost disgusted of you. "everyone else has families, and they're with them. i had no one besides you and her," jude tried to reason again.

"and you chose her? were best friends jude-"

"i needed her! there i said it! i don't care what you or other people say, i needed y/n tonight. you weren't even here, you took those walks to clear your head and the last i wanted was to stress you out after tonight. i love your sister so much," jude confessed making you gasp and step in front of the two of them.

"i think we should-" you try to intervene as the scene becomes loud in the room, afraid it would wake up others and them going to complain.

"what?" your brother deadpans at jude.

"i said i love her. i have and for so long. and tonight the only person i wanted to see and needed was her. so i'm sorry if that upsets you and for saying it now, but i can't hold my feelings inside any longer," jude says. you're afraid to speak, feeling like a kid all over again about to get scolded for doing the wrong thing.

"i can't believe this," your brother sneers, shaking his head in disappointment and walking away. you call out for him crying trying to resonate but met with the door shutting close. "he hates me. he hates me," you say to yourself, hand coming to your heart as it beats loudly and fast.

"he doesn't hate you, he hates me for falling in love with you. this isn't anyone's fault, we can't control our emotions or feelings let alone let other people control ours, y/n. i said what i said because it's true, im so madly in love with you, baby." jude brushed your tears away, kissing your forehead in a comforting manner.

"jude-" you speak but jude asks you a question that leaves you hesitant about whether to confess how you feel for him or protect your heart to make your brother and everyone happy.

"are you in love with me?"

#jude bellingham #judey thoughts 5️⃣ #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham blurb #jude bellingham one shot #football fanfic #footballer #football x reader

[xuchiya]

freak [j.wooyoung]

₊˚.༄ || filth valentines m.list || hongjoong || seonghwa || yunho || yeosang || san || mingi || wooyoung || jongho || ₊˚.༄

₊˚.༄ Skirt off, fuck in the backseat Take that shirt off, baby, put it on me ₊˚.༄

Wooyoung knew that you were one of those goody-two shoe students yet he befriended you throughout primary and secondary school and even going through the same university to pursue different courses though he always finds his way to spend lunch with you (even with the conflict schedule). 

Many students or even professors assumed you both were high school sweethearts yet you both denied that you were childhood friends; to Wooyoung’s dismay, he wishes every night on the starry mobile in his room that someday, he would have the courage to ask you out.

  On the very next day, his wish was granted that he find himself confident and overall ready to face you though with a little nervous shaking down his form but he had already made up his mind. Wooyoung slammed his tray onto the table, startling you with the sudden noise. You winced, then teased, "Someone didn't have the best morning lecture, huh?"

He slumped into the chair across from you, letting out a dramatic sigh. "Professor Lee is a tyrant in disguise. Don't get me started on the never-ending case studies."

You chuckled, pushing your own tray closer. "Want a bite of my sandwich? Professor Kim's class wasn't much better." Wooyoung’s smile slowly returned as he stole a bite, one of the many reasons he admires. "Your cooking skills are the only consolation in my day."

The familiar comfort of your shared lunch, a routine that stretched back years, settled around you. Despite your claims of being "just friends," your interactions spoke volumes to bystanders. Stolen glances, comfortable silences, and a genuine interest in each other's lives.

"Why do we always say we're 'just childhood friends,'" Wooyoung blurted out, his voice suddenly serious. You were taken back. Wooyoung was never the person to question something that doesn’t need to be questioned unless he finds suspicion on it but questioning your friendship is something out of the list you were NOT expecting at all.

You froze, the half-eaten sandwich forgotten in your hand. "Well, it's... true, isn't it?"

Wooyoung studied your face, his gaze intense; his heart were everywhere as his eyes gaze at your almost shaking and teary eyes,"Is it, though? We've been through everything together, from scraped knees in kindergarten to late-night study sessions pulling our hair out."

His words echoed in your heart, stirring a pot of unspoken emotions. You felt the warmth creep up your cheeks, and you mumbled looking down on your try playing with your food as you settled the sandwich down, "I don't know, Wooyoung."

He leaned closer, his voice almost a whisper, "Maybe it's time we found out."

Your breath hitched, head raising as your eyes returned back to his warmth tone, his eyes were something you have always found solace. The air crackled with unspoken feelings. It was then you realised Wooyoung wasn't just frustrated about Professor Lee's class anymore. 

He was nervous, making his move.

A small smile played on your lips, "Alright," you finally said, "What do you have in mind?"

Wooyoung grinned, his eyes sparkling. "How about dinner? a real date. My treat."

Your heart soared. "I'd like that, Wooyoung."

And after years of university, graduating with flying colours you both were still on the hard ground of your relationship; people found out about your new level and everyone pointed at you all with ‘see!’ and even your professors (Mr. Lee and Mr. Kim) seemed to be pleased to hear you both together. But amidst the chaos, the foundation you'd built throughout your childhood and university days held strong. You celebrated small victories, commiserate over setbacks, and found solace in each other's unwavering support.

Then, came the turning point. Your new job brought you face-to-face with San and Mingi, two vibrant colleagues who quickly became your friends and confidantes though San worked as a paediatrician under the same company.

Your company consists of engineering, information technology and doctors. Two big buildings under the same company. That's why you and San were able to meet up since the cafeteria is big enough for all the employees of the company.

 Work transformed from a daily grind to a place of shared laughter and late-night brainstorming sessions fueled by take-out and caffeine.

Wooyoung, with his ever-supportive nature, was thrilled to see you blossoming in your new environment. He, too, found his groove at his own workplace, forging bonds with his coworkers. Yunho and Jongho, coincidentally one of them happens to be your half-brother who has been working in the engineering department.

As the night draws closer, you clock out with two of your friends and San decides to drag you both to a booth to drink. At first you decline the idea but San insists that a couple of drinks will help ease the tension and pressure from the three of you since our boss gave a bloody project to your department; at the end Mingi also agrees and gives you his usual begging eyes.

 “Fine but I’ll call my Wooyoung …” They cheered, looking for a table while you stayed outside to call your boyfriend. You told him about San and Mingi wanting a drink since the next days will be hell for the three of you and wanted to rewind a little bit.

Wooyoung nodded and wanted you to have fun which made you sigh in relief. You returned back inside to see the table already filled with food and drinks, “Took you so long we started without you!” You shake your head at Wooyoung’s patience.

After a few drinks, San received a call from his girlfriend saying where he is and asking for a weird combination of pickles and chocolates. Upon seeing your confused look, Mingi chuckles, “Cravings … it’s quite odd but it satisfies them.” 

Your eyebrows rose, “you seem to know what she was asking.” Mingi shrugs, taking a shot before taking a small bite of the fried shrimp, “Being a father of 2 kids.” San chuckles before dropping the call, “Her cravings get weirder and weirder everyday yet it feels amazing to see her growing well.”

“Is this how your wife normally craves or does she have other cravings you find odd, Mingi?” San took a shot before taking a huge bite of his food. Mingi hummed, thinking about his wife’s top cravings, “well when we had our daughter, she asked me to buy potato chips and peanut butter.” 

San laughs, shaking his head, “How long did it take?” Mingi shrugs, not really keeping up with his wife’s cravings, “I haven’t taken note about it.” You hummed thinking about your aunt who gave birth to his fourth baby, and you being the only one having long patience with her when it comes to her mood swings would not ask about her weird combinations of her cravings. “they said it usually ends around the third trimester.”  

San and Mingi looked at you, you stared back confused, “What?”

Mingi observes you before asking you the question, “Were you also …?” You gasp, smacking his arm playfully which sent them laughing, Mingi throwing his hands up in defence, “I just thought okay? I’m sorry” 

 “No, I mean not yet and besides Wooyoung and I had talked about it and maybe soon we will after marriage.”

San nodded in agreement, “But you guys have spice things up?” Mingi choked on his food, causing him to cough and turn around. Your cheeks flared in so many colours that it had you grabbing another bottle and pressing it to your heated up face, “Sa-San do not say those.”

San scoff, unable to believe to see your ‘unusual side’, he may be your friend in just a few years (unlike Woo) but he has seen the other side of you, your freaky side. So does Mingi; that’s why you three got along well. You three somehow spilled such filthy thoughts one time when you were over at San and how he got his girlfriend to be his or how Mingi had praised so much that you guys teased him for being a sub and soft  for his wife. 

Wooyoung may be someone you know for the longest time but sharing the ‘freak side’ as to what the boys call it, is something beyond your comfort. 

But who knows what Wooyoung prefers, right? Both you and Wooyoung had done it a lot of times. Vanilla sex or the first time he fucks on your twentieth-third birthday just right after everyone left , rough when he has been pent up from work and needed release or even going to the extent of him having you on his lap, facing the open field and fuck you on the viranda of your home and having him spreading your legs open as you squirt out on the open.

So tell yourself now how come you haven’t opened up to Wooyoung about it?

After a few more shots, the boys called it a night and went on their separate ways while you waited for Wooyoung to pick you up whilst having your mind drifted not only to your nasty but the thought of having a baby with you.

“Baby? You okay?” You yelp in surprise when a hand is placed on your shoulders scaring you out of your thoughts. Your eyes landed on Wooyung who had a worried face, “Wooyoungie –sorry my love, I’m a little .. preoccupied with work.” You sigh, miniscule yet noticeable from your boyfriend’s eyes. Wooyoung raised an eyebrow, the perks of knowing you and your body language; he knows what is up and he knows what to do.

“Come on, maybe you had too much to drink.” Maybe it is or maybe it’s the way Wooyoung led you to the car, hand hovering close to your ass that you knew he knows whats up.

“Ah-h f-fuck Wooyoung— UGH!” He had one hand on the steering wheel whilst the other buried knuckles deep inside your pussy. The seat was inclined, giving him the chance to move his hand freely which sends you rolling your eyes back.

Wooyoung chuckles, looking at the side before poking his tongue on his cheeks, “Will you tell me now why you were so “deep” on your thoughts, baby?” His hands move in a ‘come here’ slow motion, nudging that spongy spot immediately’ squirming and moaning breathlessly on your seat had you gripping his wrist as you grind shamelessly.

Woooyoung laughs looking to the side again to catch sight of a biker glancing at your side of the seat. He had notice the eyes prying but he loves the attention most especially showing off that HE can only do that to you, fuck you so good on the seat of his car and had you moaning mess underneath his fingers.

“N-nothing .. much love— Fuck fuck love I’m gonna cum!” Your breath hitches as Wooyoung let you cum on his fingers, the relief of releasing your high and riding it off had you breathing heavily on your seat, muscles relaxed and the car moving in go.

“That’s a good girl.” His hand grip your panty, guiding you to remove it before getting a small whiff of your essence before accelerating to home.

The car squeak, windows so foggy from the hot temperature of your heated body to body and legs spread open, thrown over each of the seat as Wooyoung who no longer had the patiences as his fingers glide on his tongue, tasting your essence and groaning from how sweet and salty it combines in his taste buds that sent him in feral state, parked on a motel and wasn’t able to book in and took you there on the back seat.

Skirt off and dick deep in.

Your eyes rolled back as you bit your lip, a playful smirk on your as your body rocks along with Wooyoung. Your hands were resting on your boobs, feeling them jiggle as Wooyoung continued drilling his cock, hitting each of your walls, reaching far down what his tip could go. His hands were gripping on the head seat as his hips snapped, burying you his cock deeper and deeper and even nudging his tip on your spongy spot that had you vocalising as your coil snaps and long ‘oh’s of your juice leaks out of your pussy.

“Fuck me harder Wooyoung, just like that~” His hand grip the back of your knees, pushing it close to your chest, “Make me squirt baby~ let me get that dick wet.” Your dirty tongue rolled off and made Wooyoung grip your legs tighter before slapping your clit causing you to whimper “Again baby please please!”

Wooyoung repeatedly slap your clip then rubs them, “Is this what you like, you freaky little girl? Is this what is in your mind, huh?” You chuckle your tongue gliding across your teeth, “More than this, I want you to ram me harder, make me wet and milk you dry. Have my pussy dripping with your cum as I finger myself in the open.” 

“Fuck fuck keep clenching me baby, I like how you hold me so tight when I’m inside your pretty pussy of yours!” His hips move deliberately; his cock wets around your velvet walls. Your hands run up to his arms to his shoulders before cupping his cheeks, “I love you.”

Wooyoung’s pace never faltered but had his head dipping to meet your lips, pulling away to look you in the eye. “I love you more and ever.” His pace soon picks up, shaking the whole car once again before lowering himself further; hand now pressing on the fogged window, printing his hand as he pulls you closer to him as he spurted his seeds inside you. His hips halted, a long groan met your ears as you felt him twitch inside you as he emptied himself inside your womb. He pulled out seeing your pussy clenching as dose after dose of his cum pumps out of your hole.

He moves to open the car door, a smirk on his lips, “Then do what you wanted, you freaky girl. Show them my cum on your pussy, make yourself a mess."

 

 You entered the cafeteria with a radiating smile and good news in hand, you saw your two friends on the table. You flop down beside Mingi, smile still radiant, “So …”

The two glance at one another before looking at you, “So?”

“I’m pregnant!” You whispered yell. Your friends eyes widen, their utensils made a loud clunk noise as they ushered you to continue, you smile, “I told him about what was on my mind that time and he voice it out too that he had seen some of his co-workers having a family even way being married so .. yeah you guys gonna be uncle soon.” 

San and Mingi cooed congratulating you before moving on to where to celebrate your pregnancy to which San leaned into your ear, “So was the car sex amazing that it got you pregnant?”

#ateez #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez hard thoughts #ateez smut #ateez fanfic #ateez hard hours #ateez x reader #ateez wooyoung smut #wooyoung ateez #ateez wooyoung #jung wooyoung #wooyoung smut #jung wooyoung x reader

[strangertheories]

I've been seeing people saying that platonic Stobin is only benefitting Steve or that Robin only exists to redeem Steve from past homophobia and I'd like to politely disagree. I don't think enough people realise just how crucial their friendship was to Robin's character development outside of Steve, so I'll just spell it out here in this long post for the four year anniversary of Robin coming out to Steve.

At the start of S3, Robin is deeply sarcastic and jokingly rude, but this is not entirely what she is actually like deep down and the true Robin doesn't emerge until her and Steve are talking to each other in the bunker. She says that she acts like she doesn't care and that she floats above it all (in reference to popularity) but deep down, she just wants to feel normal and accepted.

But Robin knows she could never be accepted fully because of her attraction to women. If she acts like she doesn't care and holds Steve at an arm's length, it keeps her safe. Robin can't be rejected if she doesn't let him in. She doesn't believe anyone could ever be friends with her if they knew her secrets, so constructs this personality around herself, however deep down she is just insecure and struggling with internalised homophobia.

A lot of people talk about Robin's coming out scene, rightfully so, but I think we need to talk more about what happened before. When Steve tells Robin he's attracted to her, she looks devastated. With her guard let down after a near death experience and drugs, she was finally able to bond with someone who she now has to reject.

At first, she tries to talk Steve out of liking her. She tells him that he doesn't know the real her and that if he did, not only would be not want to date her, but he wouldn't even want to be her friend. This is where it all becomes clear that Robin's sarcasm and refusal to let her guard down is not linked to her sexuality but rather because of it.

This is why Steve accepting her is so crucial for her character from then onwards. For the first time in her life, Robin let someone see her true self, knowing that she would be rejected and lose her only friend. And yet she wasn't. Robin let Steve in and his acceptance finally enabled her to realise that just because she is gay it doesn't mean that she's abnormal or could never be happy. Obviously, there are safety concerns that prevent her from running through the streets of Hawkins with a pride flag, but I believe this acceptance is crucial to the version of Robin we see in S4.

After S4, there were a lot of complaints that the Robin we saw in that season wasn't like S3 enough and felt like a completely different character. Firstly, Robin was shown to speed talk, be unhelpful and miss social ques when nervous in the final episode of season 3, so I disagree with that criticism. But most importantly, the reason that S4 Robin is different to the one in S3 is because S3 Robin was never real. It was a character she built in order to avoid dealing with the pain of rejection or accepting that she cares about what other people think of her. But due to Steve, Robin is able to realise that she doesn't have to be someone else, hence her personality shift.

That's also kind of why I dislike the idea that her relationships with Nancy and Vickie are better than her one with Steve because she wouldn't have had those relationships if it wasn't for him. Steve enabled her to open up and let down her cool and sarcastic persona. Robin is anxious and awkward with Nancy and Vickie from the get go unlike with Steve, which ends up enabling her to ultimately make more real bonds with them much quicker. She would not have been able to do that if it wasn't for the value his acceptance brought into her life.

I'm going to get a bit mushy and personal here, so feel free to skip to the end, but platonic Stobin isn't just meaningful to the fictional character of Robin. I'm an autistic lesbian and I have had a lot of struggles with making and maintaining friendships. For a while, I didn't have any friends at all and I was very depressed. But now my mental health is so much better because I was able to find a friend who fully accepted me, who I didn't have to mask around, who I easily came out to. Becoming friends with her has enabled me to become way more comfortable with unmasking my autism outside of that one relationship because being more vulnerable is what enabled that friendship to be so much better in the long term.

Robin is a character I relate to a lot, and I've written a lot of posts on autistic Robin in the past. I think seeing friendships portrayed on screen where a girl is able to let down her mask, learn to become herself and become much less distant to the point that she explicitly feels comfortable telling someone she has issues with social ques is great for all kids. So many people, especially autistic people, struggle with being themselves and with finding friends. Maybe Robin did just exist to redeem Steve or whatever, but I know seeing that friendship on screen meant a lot to me. It's so difficult to find someone who accepts you and to open up to someone, but I think that platonic Stobin shows that it can be worth it.

Sorry for the mushy side tangent at the end, but I hope this post explains the importance of Steve's acceptance to Robin's character development. Acting like she only exists for Steve is dismissive of the impact that friendship had on the development Robin has and will have, especially if you view Rebel Robin as being somewhat canon. Not to mention, clarifying a loveable character is no longer homophobic feels like a pretty good thing.

#long post #stranger things #robin buckley #steve harrington #platonic stobin #ronance #rovickie #autistic robin buckley #byler #<- target audience

[greeenchrysanthemums]

I’d love to hear anything you’ve got about Pearl from your gg rivals au! Super interesting concept, I’ve been loving the asks you’ve answered so far

Oh, yes! I've been dying to talk about Pearl. She is extremely important to the plot, as well as a favorite of mine.

GG Pearl is a mercenary of sorts. She does whatever you ask of her for the right price, including murder if it is within her skill range. However, most of her jobs include acting as a bodyguard, helping repair buildings, spying for information, things to that affect. It is rare that she has to take a life, but not unheard of.

She never had much of a family growing up, having lost them to war and disease before the memory of their faces could even form properly in her mind. The only lifelong companion she ever had was her dog, Tilly. It was her and Tilly against the world for the longest time.

She is one of very few people who knew Grian when he was a kid. They clicked immediately and were as thick as thieves before he abruptly disappeared when they were barely teenagers, and she was left alone all over again. She only met him again once the resistance was in full swing. It was how she learned he was even still alive, the descriptions of him were too similar to be a coincidence.

She wanted nothing more than to be bitter at him for leaving her without an explanation, to blow up at him and make him feel as hurt as she had been all those years ago, but the second he offered her a place in the resistance, she caved and agreed. She just didn't want to be alone anymore.

She occasionally skips town for the odd job or another, so she isn't always around. She comes and goes as she pleases and has no real position in the resistance. She just helps where she can. She can't help but feel like an outsider because of it.

Now, you see, Pearl is very curious and nosey by nature. She can't help getting herself involved in things that do not concern her. So, naturally, she had to go see what the deal was with her friends so called "rival".

And how did she do this? By breaking into the castle, of course. Well, not all the way in. She planted herself right on the wall of the training grounds and waited. Gem tried to attack her at first, but Pearl said she just wanted to watch and that made her hesitate. Gem was skeptical and warry, but somehow Pearl's innocent smile was enough to make her let her stay. And so, stay and watch Pearl did.

Her little break-in only served to make her more curious, though, so Pearl showed up every day at the same time to watch Gem train. It became part of both of their routines. Soon, they began to talk during these afternoons together and formed a quick friendship. Pearl never told Gem much about herself, only the odd story from her travels/childhood, and Gem never pried.

Pearl never intended to befriend Gem, it just sort of happened. Now she is stuck between two worlds, unsure of what to do. She loves Gem, thinks of her as her best friend, but she's loyal to Grian on grounds of their history together. She tries to tell herself that it's just curiosity that keeps her going back to that stone wall, but it's a flimsy lie at best.

Grian thinks she only goes to Gem to get information. Impulse and Scott think she is just a girl from town who Gem befriended (though Scott has the sinking feeling he's seen her before...).

Pearl isn't sure how long she can keep up either of the facades she has built up: an uncaring informant, and a harmless town girl. Neither of them are who Pearl is, but she's afraid that letting either one go would result in her losing either Grian or Gem. She couldn't handle either of those, no matter how much she tries to tell herself she could.

#pearlescentmoon #geminitay #GG rivals au #hermitcraft #life series #shiny duo #pearl's indecision WILL cause problems down the line #they may even have a “you don't want to do this” moment.... #also i apologise i know the common headcannon is that pearl and grian are related but I much prefer them as friends #particularly in this au #GG asks

[undercoverpena]

vii. take care of me

frankie morales x f!reader | chapter seven of i like the way you

best friend! friends with benefits! frankie morales summary: what starts off as an offhand remark, quickly becomes a regular, scheduled 'stress relief'. the only problem is, both of you are in denial that you feel anything outside of friendship for the other.

warnings: friends with benefits. fwb! rules. flirting. idiots who are so in love it’s stupid. feelings. smut - p in v. reader has a bad day, soft romantic fucking.

word count: 4.7k

an: the biggest thanks to @thetriumphantpanda who read this before bake off and left me a bunch of comments that made me so excited, you almost had this chapter yesterday.

You had seemed downtrodden before he rocked up and ‘broke a rule’.

His pretence at forgetting all quickly seen through, as though he’s transparent. He had wanted to explain that he had only wanted to cheer you up, but you looked less in the mood for an apology than you did an explanation.

So he swallowed both.

From the middle of the week, he had suspected something was wrong. When he had finally managed to call you, you had sounded so close to tears, that he wondered whether he should drive back sooner.

Especially when you had barely laughed at a joke he made on one of his commutes back to the hotel—barely even answering when he asked it if was his movie choice or yours.

I don’t mind. You always mind. If I remember right, you have a real thing about me always pickin’ the movie, querida. Well, I don’t today, okay? You can pick—I—Frankie, I have to go.

When the end call tone flooded the bed of his truck, he’d strongly suspected that you’d fought your way off the phone with him so you could crumble. Cracking yourself open into a bunch of shards, all pressure-cooked by the weight of everything you take on, only to say you’re fine.

It’s why he had driven past your place the day before he had made plans to see you. Fighting with himself about getting out and going up to your door. Weighing up the options as to whether checking on you tonight or waiting for tomorrow would be best.

Then there was the fact he wasn’t sure if it was as your best friend or as someone who hopes for something more.

The lines blurred, practically erased. A speech is likely needed, but he’s as poor with words as he is with owning how he feels, so it’s easier to stuff them down—to drive away, wait.

It’s why he grabbed it to begin with. Why he’d been grabbing them since you put the darn rule in place anyway. A habit, a part of his routine seeing you—a thing he did to show you that you mattered, were important, cared for.

Which is why he’d wrestled with him again on whether to leave it in the car when he walked up to your front door or not.

“You broke a rule.”

You look glum, defeated. Whatever your working week had done to you, it had stolen more from you than you’d been able to—never mind willing to give.

And it fractured a part of him. Made his shoulders sink, his heart sinks—because nothing hurt him more than the look on your face. The one which should be full of smiles and twinkling eyes.

Kissing your cheek, he closes your front door behind him. “I think you’ll forgive me.”

You just snort. Momentarily smothering the sadness that had been there before he’d showed you the bottle—whatever had upset you buried, all of it being quickly hidden as you placed the wine down and picked up your water bottle.

It forces more confusion to swirl inside of him, more so as you begin to go back and forth with him on food, on what he wants to watch, and whether he wants to share a blanket or have his own.

He replies in his usual tone, even if his attention is split into equal parts—one part focused on the little things you do, the mannerisms you’re not aware to pretend. The other on the IKEA furniture he built, the memories pricking him, needling, making the zipper of his jeans suddenly feel uncomfortable over his cock.

“Work been okay?”

Your mouth falls open, all set to answer, but then something shifts in your eyes. A shadow—possibly—it dancing across the plain, suddenly all but desperate to thump its way out.

Then the words never come. Swallowing instead, discarding whatever you'd been about to say—pushing it back before any lingering parts of it are blinked away as you offer a nod.

“Yeah. Yours?” you answer, but your tone isn’t right.

It’s flat, without its usual infliction. There isn't any edge to your words, nor a tease or taunt, not even a Morales in sight. And, the smile you paint doesn’t quite reach the eyes.

It’s practically humming now, the fact something is wrong. It simmers, hanging around, whistling through the air.

Yet, you don’t break, don’t confess it all to him like you had once done with such ease. Instead, you just smear another smile on your face, nudging him, phone in hand as you mumble about food options and what he wants as you lead him to the sofa.

He knows on the surface, it looks the same—how the night is playing out. But it’s different. In all the ways he doesn’t want to put his finger on, and doesn’t want to acknowledge. Not as you order food, not as you chew the inside of your cheek as you wait for the order to be accepted.

Even less so when you mumble about the film, reaching for your remotes.

It's then he decides what he wants to do is take the remote from your hand as soon as you pick it up. Frankie wants to hold your fingers in his, even place a kiss on your wrist. He wants to place two fingers under your chin, and ask you again to tell him what has happened—wanting to be let him in, be shared with.

He wants you close, and not like friends do. A need to have your head to his chest, his fingers sliding gentle strokes against your cheek and neck, offering comfort, providing it in plenty.

His own head turns the options over, planning it out, trying to guess what the various outcomes are. Which, by the time he reacts, instead of managing to grasp your hand, he knocks the remote from your hand with a clatter.

Ears burning, he feels your glare before he truly appreciates it. It ripples out over him before it’s blinked away—a momentary flood of fire licking at his skin.

In the oddest way, it’s at least reminiscent of the person he knows. The sharpness in your eyes is more a friend to him right now than the gnawing going on in his chest. Especially, while the rest of you is lost to whatever you’re trying to pretend doesn’t exist.

“What?”

It’s simple, one word.

Almost feels normal. It's all sharp and layered, just like it usually is. Followed by your body sinking into the array of cushions you decorate your sofa with as you pull up his pick, rolling your head to him—nail-picking at the battery cover on your remote.

And he wants to ask again—just like he always would have done.

Instead, Frankie places his hand on your knee, thumb and index swirling over the cloth-covered bone as you look at the television briefly, before flicking back to him.

In the silence, it’s louder—the whistling. It's suddenly accompanied by the noticeable noise of your brain whirring, your cogs turning.

“Talk to me,” he whispers, but secretly he's pleading, begging.

He watches as your teeth pick at your lip, snuggling yourself further into the couch—knee abutting his leg as you sigh. “It's... nothing. Can we... can we just watch the movie?”

“Hey, of course we can. Is…”

He can't ask.

Fearful of asking. A lump forms in his throat, sticking, thickening second by second as he flicks his eyes over you.

Before you can blink it away, he spots it again. The shift in your eyes.

This time instead of a shadow, they fill with water. They vanish any part of your truth that wished to escape in its drowning. Before he can poke and push, you blink it away as quickly as it had first arrived.

And it needles him, pricks at his skin and stabs into his chest, twisting and twisting and twisting—

“I just… wanted my best friend,” you mumble.

“That it?”

You seem to fight it, whatever it is inside of you, before you curl against his arm again, tugging your blanket up closer. “I really missed you this week, that's all.”

It’s been on his to-watch list for ages, and yet he’s one hour into it and he has no clue what is happening.

The pizza box is still half-open on the coffee table, your plate still remaining with picked-at food that you never really made any dent in, and he blames that as to why he doesn’t even know who the good guy is and who is bad.

Because all of the parts of his brain that usually begin working on undoing and arranging what he thinks will and is happening, are working in overdrive on you.

It's also stopping his heart from hammering even louder down your ear. Because, even if the two of you have cuddled before—lots of times—it's not been post the whole sleeping together thing.

And, it feels nice having you against him, normal, right.

He likes the way your fingers occasionally clutch him a little closer, head turned in the direction of the television and the movie he should be watching.

Instead, he's piecing together the puzzle you've thrown on the floor. The one without the box lid, so no image to compare it to. Trying to assess where you missing him, lines up with the way your bottom lip almost wobbled as you confessed it, as though it was a sin and not a virtue.

Frankie tries to line it up with the fact he knows whenever he's found a moment to himself, he’s texted you. The sea of other unread messages piling up, collecting.

It adds to the knowledge that all of the normal conversation he has with you, quickly derails, slipping into something foreign yet wonderful. Casual phone calls, divert into him with his hand around his cock, listening to you breathlessly say his name and that you wish he was there.

And that somewhere between collecting the sweet noises you make and those innocent-but-not-innocent moments, are the soft moments he has where you’re resting—where Frankie has realised, decided and accepted, that there is nowhere else he likes being.

Not a single place.

Because he wants this.

Frankie wants the calmer person he is when he's around you, the thoughts which are less intrusive. He likes that the rain barely bothers him when he has you in his arms, that he doesn’t even overthink, if anything he just plans. Considering things, turning them over, thinking of a future that begins to sketch itself out and colour itself in.

Something which has been doing so since the time in the car.

Your words rolling and rolling, stitching themselves to other phrases you’ve let slip, until he’s sewing things together to create a gallery, a museum of moments he loves admiring and replaying when the world goes silent.

That's when he notices the movie, the shit-show of a plan formed involving a helicopter, and the words roll from him without stopping.

"That would never fuckin' happen. Not—can you imagine, if I said to you—" and he rambles. Feels himself doing so. So comfortable and at ease more and more things just flow and fall from his lips.

Even when the scene changes in the movie, more bright light than the softer one from before, forcing him to blink—he is still detailing how inaccurate it is. Only slowing to nothing when he realises you’re looking up at him. Hanging on to every word as though he's a poet reading something beautiful.

He feels the way they tracing him then, lightly glazing over all his features as he slowly holds your stare.

Because it’s the kind of gaze he sees in the movies you make him watch. The lingering ones—a blend of both fiery and craving. It all peppered with yearning, and swirling in so much he suspects you don’t want to say.

“You’re going to miss the movie.”

Blinking, you smile. Feeling you flick your eyes from him to his mouth. “Am I?”

Your smile slides further into your cheek, and he can’t help but brush his thumb over it. A dire need to touch you, brush your soft skin and remind himself how you feel.

He doesn’t expect it, but he likes that you curl into his hand. It allows him to trace his fingers along your jaw, down the side of your neck. Half-expecting you to tell him to stop, that tonight isn’t about that.

You don’t.

Instead, your hand cups his against your cheek, staring at him, lit up by the flickering scenes neither of you are paying attention to.

Faintly, blooming out in the shimmer of your eyes, he thinks he sees it again—what he thinks is adoration. It mixing, blending, swirling with care, love…

“Thought you wanted your best friend?”

“I do,” you say, low, just above a whisper, “So, take care of me.”

A second passes as your words drip into the air.

So take care of me.

His eyes flick over you. Likely needing you to say it again, give permission, tell him you want this.

You do. Fuck you do.

Your heart hammering against your chest like a drum because of it. All unable to speak, fearful, fucking petrified, with how much you want him.

Because all you do is want him, and if you speak, you worry you won’t stop telling him that.

Let it fall, leak. Slip out and stain like oil on a sheet.

Because you know it's only normal to miss him this much for one reason, and one reason alone. It's the same reason why you want him, crave him, and feel so desperate for him that you can’t think or breathe. It is all-encompassing, looming, forever there in between the days you don't see him and the waiting on replies to texts.

It’s so close to your tongue, held back only by your teeth.

It could come out, could escape. So you keep your mouth clamped shut. It is better, easier, and less bothersome than telling him you’ve been counting down the hours, minutes, and seconds until you could have your hands on him. Not for this, not because he makes you feel good and beautiful and wanted, but because you feel better. Happier. More you. You feel safe, like no bad work day could ever touch you.

“Querida…”

“I want y—”

The rest of your words are swallowed, stolen. Frankie seals his mouth over yours, barely needing a sentence, just enough.

And it’s searing, full of ache as his hands pull you close, your body singing, itching to come alive—has been since the scent of just him hit your nose.

The worst of days doesn’t matter when he’s around you, less so when his lips marry to yours, when he licks into your mouth, when he breathes you in, and you breathe him.

No one else has ever made you feel like he does.

Not the way your feet almost kick out when his message arrives, a smile gracing your mouth without control when he calls you.

Because he’s different, but then he always has been.

There's always been something, it thriving and growing, embedding vines you pretend are just because you're good friends. But you know, you do. It's hard not to.

Frankie saves you, oblivious to the silent plea for rescue—he just knows. He gets you. Understands every inch of you now, you're unsure how anyone else can ever read you as well. He's someone you could confidently rely on, knowing he’d never leave you alone, not even in the dark—forever a light, a way home.

You think you’re that for him too. Hope so anyway.

He moans your name. Kissing you like he never wishes to stop. He acts like he wants to drown in you, be overflowed by you, and fuck you want the same.

Mine. That’s what you want to say.

Instead, you bury it in a low moan when his mouth captures yours, tongue sliding past your teeth as his hands come to rest on your cheeks. Each touch softer, gentler—from the way he moves his fingers over your cheek, to the way he slides them over your jaw, landing on your neck.

Then, his mouth comes to your ear, breath dancing, all flooded with the flickering television—let’s go to your bed.

He doesn’t rip, he peels your layers off, leaving a trail leading right to your room. He smothers your body with his, his palm remaining flat to your spine, leading, hooking his fingers around the back of your neck as he steers you.

Careful, hermosa.

The consideration dripping from his lips like syrup, all adorned in affection, a taste you have to capture, spinning in his hold, hooking your arms around his neck as you pull him flush, close.

“Tell me you want me,” he hisses.

There's an edge that isn’t usually there but it’s pounding now, all sparkling and fucking shimmering.

You’re more sure of it when he lies you back on your sheets, his mouth exploring, taking his time, taking you to the edge with his mouth as you plead and plead—one hand sliding up over the softness of your stomach, as your back arches into him.

And you shudder, so close to your high—hips held down by his arm. “I want you, Frankie. Always want you. Want you inside of me.”

He pauses—cool air blowing over you as he flicks his eyes up from between your thighs, his skin flushes, a light beading of sweat at his hairline as he comes up onto his palms.

Watching him crawl up you, eyes enamoured, unable to look anywhere else even if they were commanded to. Because he’s more than a sight for sore eyes, he is the sight. He’s the best-looking thing you’ve ever fucking seen, clutching his face in your hands, feeling him drag the head of his cock through your slick walls, staring at you in waiting, like he couldn’t believe this is happening.

“Again,” he asks.

Taking your hand in his, he slots his fingers between yours, fitting, ever so perfectly, before he places your conjoined hands above your head. Eyes tracing up and down your frame, more so as you arch into him, hearing the breathed-out expletive as you wait for his stare to land.

“I want you.”

And, thankfully, Frankie doesn’t let you linger on it. Doesn’t allow you to hyper-focus on it, slowly sliding in, pushing in by inch until you’re full of just him—no more of him left that you can greedily take.

“Always take me so well, baby—“

“Frankie.”

You’re breathless. The air punched from your lungs—his hand remaining knotted in yours, grounding, your nails digging into his skin as his other hand finds a place on the back of your thigh, eyes dropping, all fixated on where the two of you are joined.

“Y'so good for me. Always so good for me,” he adds when his hips are flush with yours. “Take my cock so well.”

Letting his gaze return to you, you’re suddenly so grateful for the bedside lamp you’d left on hours ago because now you get to see him. Admire him, so much so, it makes your throat dry.

Able to watch his muscles contort when he moves, lips parting as he slowly cants his hips into yours, all deep strokes.

And, you know it’s still fucking, but it’s also not.

It’s a unique blend of need that feels right, and also wrong—lips messily finding yours, burying confessions as you eagerly swallow them.

Hoping your throat, lungs or stomach could begin to decipher them as you feel his hand slide down your wrist, and arm until it's cupping your face. His lips slide over your cheek, resting close to your ear, whispering compliments. Because he has to tell you that you’re gorgeous, he says; that you're always so stunning.

Each word that lands has more than an effect on you, as he stutters when you clench around him.

Mouth wrapped around an exclamation of his name as he slides out and sinks back into you.

Frankie has always felt big, but from this angle, like this—he’s somehow deeper, filling you more. He's in your soul. It all filthy and romantic and obscene, but it feels so good, makes heat bloom through your hips and up into your spine, it twisting, eroding the bad day, the bad week.

In a sense, he’s the perfect antidote. A person you trust, care for, lo—

“You’re perfect, you know that?”

Frankie’s hand slides back to grip yours, pressing it down—lightly against the pillow above you, before placing the other beside it. And he’s enveloped in part shadows and the light from the table, blessed in golden hues, giving just enough to see how wild his eyes are and how deep the brown in them goes, how blown his pupils are.

“Do you know how beautiful you look right now?”

You feel your cheeks warm, your ears—every bit of skin on show suddenly inflamed because of his words. His mouth lapping at your breasts, all arched into him, hips steadily meeting his.

“Always are, really.”

“Well. You’re handsome, Morales.”

It’s intentional, adding his surname. Taking the softness out of it, removing what you can, and adding barriers and throwing up walls.

He still sucks in a breath, eyes lingering on yours, fingers dropping to brush a line up and down your cheek as he continues to slide his cock in and out of you. You moan as the head of him keeps kissing that part deep inside you.

It’s different.

You know it; he likely does too. Thankful he slants his mouth over yours. Slowly rocking with you, thrusting into you as you murmur his name, it falling enriched in moans.

From the way you both kiss, to the way you keep an arm around his neck, desperate to keep as much of him against yours.

“You feel so good, Frankie.” Your fingers scratch at the base of his neck. “Always make me feel so full.”

Stuffed really. Packed in. Clenching around him, all tightening, purposefully wrapping your walls around him until he groans right into your ear. Each drag of his cock in and out feeling exquisite, perfect, amazing.

It’s never been like this with others, never been like this even with him. His fucked out face, the grunts and groans coming from deep within make your thighs unable to stop their twitching as fire floods up your spine and the way he plunges you in lust-filled brown.

And you clutch his face, feverish from him, quivering, shaking. Burying the words, “So close, I’m gonna—fuck, I’m close baby,” against his mouth.

Pressing each letter in, stamping it—ensuring he knows it’s him doing this to you. Making a mess of you. The only person you ever want to make a mess out of you.

It thumping inside of you, hammering—all balled up fists and desperation because you want to tell him. Shout it at him. Paint the walls in it as he paints yours in white.

“Need you, Frankie.”

It’s close to the truth. Barely an inch from it.

“I know, need you too. Need to feel you come around me, hermosa. I need it, please. Please give it to me. Let me feel—fuck—feel you coming around my cock.”

And you hear it, the way he pleads—as well as realise the double meaning. You in the car, whispering words so close to the ones he’s spilling now.

“I will if you stay.”

He doesn’t still, but he does jolt. A hesitation in his pistoning.

Then he drops to his elbows around your face, cradling you, caging you in, as he kisses you—sloppily, messily, sweetly. It’s soft, but also full of heavy moans he wishes to force down your throat. It’s indulgent, a thing you never thought you’d have so now you take as much of it as you can get.

“Course I’ll stay. Never—fuck—anywhere I want to be but here, baby. Nowhere else.”

His eyes fix on you, digging the words in.

And, even if you knew it before, you realise how under your skin he is. How he’s woven in around tendons and ligaments, found a home, left marks against your bones you never want to rid.

You’re sure it’s that and not the words which make everything else mute.

Even if it’s all you can hear. Not the television in the other room, not the headboard clattering against the wall, not the sounds you’re making each time he drags his cock through your walls.

Just his words. Whatever he blesses you in. Your thoughts are all incoherent other than that. All shaky, practically vibrating; all gasping and torturous heavy heat, all unable to breathe and yet never wanting any of this to stop.

His hand slides around your thigh, pulling on your knee, bringing it closer as his grip almost grows bruising on you. He’s deep. Fucking into you so hard, hearing the concoction of his hisses, gasps and moans, before his mouth lands back on yours.

It’s overwhelming. The height you’ve reached, the way your mouth is only able to say his name as you watch him lick his thumb and distinctly feel it slide between the two of you. Finding it. Barely struggling to press the pad of it to your bundle of nerves before you lock up, the knot tightening, almost ripping inside of you.

It fraying from how much you’re fighting it, so close to bursting—

Then he draws quicker circles, all persistent, expertly, and you snap.

It surging, all white-hot, all blistering and mind-melting. You become both light and heavy all at once, your nails finding purpose in his side and your sheets, twisting, knotting to root yourself in this, in him—in how much you fucking love him.

“Fuck, querida—that’s it.”

You can’t respond, can’t even think up a response, but you do yank his mouth to yours. Pressing those three words there, laying them down, as well as thanking him, over and over until you slide your mouth against his cheek.

“Be good for me now, Frankie.”

His eyes flick to you, all ablaze and engulfed in want. And so you nod, knowing he can see it, feel it.

“Look so good, baby,” you add.

The noise is strained that comes from him, all sucked in breath. Then, his hips stammer, convulsing, all strangled, tightly entangled in a mess of your name and fuck.

And you kiss him.

Happily licking into his mouth to taste how delicious his moan is.

You try to fight the way your heart drops when you return from using the bathroom. Biting the inside of your mouth as you see the bed empty, sheets a mess, your throat swallowing back whatever sob wishes to escape.

Because the edges of your happiness crumble, your arm wrapping around the other, bottom lip almost wobbling.

That is, until you feel his hand on your lower back. Your head turns quickly, seeing him there. All hair-wild, and soft smile.

“Water, baby?”

Smiling, you thank him, taking several sips before handing it back to him, watching him do the same. Studying the way his throat bobs as he does, the faint marks of your mouth still lingering there on his skin.

“C’mon,” he whispers, kissing your cheek. “Let’s get in bed.”

“Oh, but the—“

“I’ve sorted it. Turned it off—folded the blanket, put the plates in water.” His hand wraps itself around yours. “So, let’s sleep.”

All you can muster is an okay. It leaves soft, slightly webbed at the edges from the way it catches on the growing lump in your throat.

It isn’t until you’re curled against him,

“Is this okay?” you whisper.

He lets out a laugh, little and breathy. “More than okay, hermosa.”

Guiding your leg to hook over his. Keeping his body flush as the two of you cuddle. His thumb swipes across your cheek, forehead close to yours as his fingers fan out over your hip, and he presses a kiss to the space between your brows.

You’re pretty sure your heart just tripled in size.

And those three words, the ones which have amassed into a chunk in your chest have suddenly begun pulsing all on their own—a beat completely separate, you find, to the one which pumps blood around your body.

CHAPTER EIGHT ->

#frankie morales x reader #francisco morales x reader #francisco morales smut #Frankie morales x reader smut #frankie morales x f!reader #frankie morales x you #frankie morales #jo: iltwy #triple frontier x reader #francisco morales fanfiction #triple frontier fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #francisco catfish morales x reader #catfish morales x reader #frankie morales smut #triple frontier smut #frankie morales x f!reader smut #pedrostories

[changetyre]

HE MADE ME FEEL DIRTY (DR3) Ⓢ Ⓦ

SUMMARY: Work has been hell for you ever since your breakup with your ex boyfriend. His fragile masculinity making him want to shout out to the world it was all your fault and no one should want to come close to you. (Daniel Ricciardo x Reader)

WARNINGS: STDs, toxic relationships, insecurities, cheating, terribly written soft smut. This one is also a little on the longer side ;) and also not proofread ;(

A/N: First time I write a longer story on here ;) lmk if you like it.

It all started when your boyfriend had slowly become more and more distant from you. You hadn't been dating that long but there was a moment everything changed and from then you couldn't even remember the last time you were even intimate with him, having to satisfy yourself with toys and your own hands for the past 2 months.

He came home one day furious and you didn't understand why but to be honest this was the most interaction you'd had with him in a while. He shoved past you, ignoring your questions before he started packing his clothes.

"What are you doing? What happened?!" You shouted for the umpteenth time.

"What happened is that I had to take a blood test at work today and it came back positive for an STD! This is all your fault!" He yelled.

It took you a second to truly comprehend what he'd said. You had been forced to take the blood test as well but yours came back clean so you knew that only meant one thing but why was he blaming you?

Several people found out. The gossip spread like wildfire in a team like that. But he had a plan, he was so embarrassed by his results and everyone found out that he started blaming you, amongst his friends he called you a whore, and he claimed you cheated on him and that was the reason he caught it, victimizing himself and placing the blame entirely on you.

Work was hell after that, people eyed you, judge you, and all of a sudden people treated you like you were highly contagious, avoiding you, even those who claimed to be your friends.

So when one day one of your co-workers, some would even claim the most important one, approached you and starts talking to you, you were completely startled and taken aback as was everyone else around you.

Daniel Ricciardo just a few days after his first day in office had opted for making conversation with you.

"I'm Daniel." He extended his hand out to you in the cafeteria. You looked down at his hand hesitating, you could feel everyone's gaze on you and it was like the whole building went silent as they witnessed the interaction.

"y/n." You took his hand. You had to admit it made you feel uncomfortable not because of him but because you'd been deprived of touch and attention for so long that it felt wrong.

"Do you mind if I sit with you?" He then asked as he grabbed some food for himself.

"Uhm, are you sure?" You were still hesitant. Why was he doing this? Surely he'd heard what everyone said about you.

But Daniel wasn't afraid of what people thought, he knew exactly what it felt like to have everyone treat you like the ugly duckling.

During your first interaction, you only gave short and quick replies to him not being used to the attention for so long but also not wanting him to ruin his own reputation by talking to you. To be fair you'd lost so much trust in people a part of you felt like it was all a joke.

But as days, turn to weeks and weeks turn to months and Daniel keeps talking to you every day you grow close, and it's only long after that you realize how real your friendship is.

Daniel never gives up talking to you, he hasn't admitted it to you yet but he finds you gorgeous, funny, and interesting.

You were eating lunch at the paddock one afternoon when your mind began spiraling once again and you finally built up the courage to ask Daniel what you'd been wanting to do since the first day he spoke to you. "Danny, why do you talk to me?"

"What?" Daniel was confused by your question.

"C, mon you're not blind, you can see you're the only person in this team who talks to me. And I know you've heard the rumors so why do you talk to me?" you set your fork down and looked at him waiting for an answer.

He set his cutlery down too. "I have heard the rumors." he began.

You looked down, embarrassment consuming you despite the fact that you knew your innocence.

"But I don't give a shit." he shrugged. "For all I care, it's all bullshit, and even if it wasn't I don't care. You're kind, compassionate, funny, gorgeous, and incredible and that's all that matters to me."

You didn't expect Daniel's reply and you felt overwhelmed. "I-" You were speechless.

"Listen I don't know what happened. But I'm ready to listen whenever you want to tell me." Daniel had reached over grabbing your hand across the table.

You weren't sure why but his words made you emotional. Someone was finally willing to listen after so long. You felt tears begin to prickle in your eyes.

"I'm sorry I have to go." You got up wiping your eye quickly before Daniel could notice before you practically ran way from him.

But Daniel noticed. He saw the way your words got caught in your throat and he saw the way you wiped the tears from your eyes but this only prompted him to seek you out more.

___

You stood under the shower letting the water fall over you. You were stuck in your thoughts about what Daniel had said this afternoon. No one had spoken to you like that in a long time and you'd almost forgotten what it felt like to have someone care.

You were snapped out of your thoughts when you heard knocking at your hotel room door. You shut off the water listening out, maybe the knocking wasn't on your door. But then there it was again, louder and more persistent.

You stepped out of the shower and quickly wrapped a towel around yourself. You walked to your hotel door and opened it slightly peaking your head around.

"Daniel?" You weren't exactly sure why you were surprised to see him, it wasn't unusual for him to come visit you at your hotel room or vice versa but given your last conversation you thought he might want to avoid you for a while.

He looked like he had something on his mind and this was confirmed when he opened the door wide pushing past you.

"Look y/n I'm sorry if I said something that I shouldn't have before and I know I said that I would give you time to tell me your story whenever you felt ready but..."

Daniel stopped himself once he saw you hugging your chest trying to cover yourself up as much as you could.

"Oh..." you didn't miss the way his eyes scanned your body. "I'm sorry I didn't know-" He turned around facing away from you.

Although you knew he did it out of respect you weren't able to push away the thought that he turned away out of repulsion. You rushed into the bathroom and pulled on a bathrobe around your body.

"Daniel, what are you doing here?" You finally spoke signaling for him that he could turn around.

He turned around and you saw his eyes scan your body once more, you almost thought you could see a look of disappointment in his eyes which only made you more conscious. Was he expecting you to be fully dressed?

"I didn't mean to push earlier." he spoke finally looking into your eyes. "But I care about you and I've tried to be patient but I can't hide it anymore-" he took a pause.

Nerves filled your stomach. Nothing positive realistically came to mind. "It's okay- I understand you wanna get away from me..." you began, your voice shaky

"Wait what?" Daniel asked confused.

"You stuck with me longer than most people do, but I get it he talked to you, you believed him, and I don't blame you because-" You avoided his eyes

"Hey hey stop what are you talking about-" Daniel walked closer and grabbed your face between his hands gently. "Why would you think that." He wiped his thumbs under your eyes making you realize you had started crying.

"He talked to you? He told you I cheated? Told you I gave him an STD and I'm a who-"

"Shhh." He interrupted you before you could finish. "stop that." Daniel pulled you into his chest. "Don't say that, whatever he said I don't care for it, I only care for you." He reassured you. He held you tightly but once you realized you were only in your bathrobe you started feeling self-conscious once more.

It only sunk in now, coming to realize how being treated dirty for so long has made you feel dirty in your head, you’re scared of people touching you, Daniel touching you despite knowing you never did anything wrong in the first place. Your ex, he made you feel dirty.

You pull away and Daniel notices the sudden shift in your attitude, the way you pull your robe a little closer to yourself, almost as if you were trying to hide in it.

"Why do you do that?" This time Daniel decided not to keep quiet.

"Do what?" You weren't actually sure what he meant.

"Why do you hide from me?" He asked again.

Your eyes snapped up to his, not having been confronted about this ever. "I don't know what-"

"Don't do that." Daniel said sternly but not aggressively.

You just stared at him, you could tell he wasn't going to let this know, he'd come here with a mission and you had a strong feeling it had to do with making you open up.

"I feel disgusting." Your voice broke. "He made me feel so dirty, and gross and people have avoided me so much, they've avoided touching me for so long that it doesn't feel okay anymore, like....like I'm not allowed to be touched anymore," you revealed.

Daniel wondered if you could hear his heart shatter in his chest if you could see the way his chest tightened at hearing your words. The mix of anger and hurt about what someone had done to you, someone so beautiful and pure as you. He wanted nothing but to wrap you in his arms and whisper sweet words to you until he could make you see the woman he saw.

"Let me touch you," Daniel whispered, softly as if not trying to scare you away.

As much as your body screamed to be touched by him you couldn't shake off the discomfort your mind caused. "Daniel I-"

"Please." He pleaded, stepping closer but not reaching out to you yet. "Please let me show you how wrong you are, let me be the one to help you put back what he broke and make you art with my hands."

You just looked at him again, his words were enough to cause all sorts of emotions to flutter in you. And despite your mind telling you to run your heart and body fought harder, giving him a small nod.

Daniel walked closer reaching out to scoop your face in his hands once again. He didn't miss the way your breath hitched and your eyebrows furrowed slightly at the contact.

He was so gentle, stroking your cheeks before his other hands slowly made their way around you pulling you closer to him by your waist.

Your face was so close to his, the closest it had been to another person in what felt like forever it half excited you and half scared you.

"You're so beautiful," Daniel whispered to you before he closed the gap between the both of you planting his lips on yours.

You let out a moan as soon as he began moving his lips, it almost embarrassed you and you would've pulled away if it wasn't for Daniel's hand sliding to the back of your neck and pulling you closer.

For Daniel, it was hard, not because of anything you imagined but because he had been so desperate for this for so long, wanting nothing but to be able to feel you, to taste you and it was almost embarrassing for him how quickly he got turned on by that simple moan that it became evident in his pants.

He began planting kisses across your jaw and down your neck. "Look at what you do to me," He whispered.

You looked down and saw what he was talking about and the smirk that appeared on your lips made you realize the boost of confidence this gave you.

This was enough for you to feel okay with reaching out to Daniel, intertwining your fingers in his curls, and gripping his shirt to pull him closer to you.

"Please make me feel good." You pulled Daniel back up to face you and your words not only took him by surprise but you too.

Daniel wasted no time scooping you in his arms as he walked further into your hotel room and placed you in the center of the bed.

In a quick motion, he removed his shirt chucking it across the room. Your mouth watered at the sight of Daniel's sculpted body that you couldn't help but reach out to feel his body with your own fingers, tracing the squares down his body.

Daniel let out of grown that made the space between your legs tingle. "Don't be such a tease." he leaned down to continue his trail of kisses down your neck.

You giggled but it was soon replaced by a big sigh as Daniel's finger slipped under the collar of the robe pushing it to the side as he began kissing down your collarbone and further and further down.

He got up once again to remove his pants which had now become painfully tight around his legs leaving only his boxers.

"Here." He went to undo the knot that held the robe together but not before looking into your eyes for approval.

Once again your mind tried talking you out of it but you had never felt so sure of anything in your life and you knew you'd be okay, he'd take care of you so once again you gave him a nod of approval.

Daniel pulled the lace that held the robe together and undid it. He then pushed the two sides of the robe apart presenting you completely bare to him. Daniel didn't stop until the robe was completely off you and it joined the rest of his clothes on the ground.

Your arms and hands instinctively went across your body trying to cover yourself.

"Don't hide." Daniel reminded you gently prying your hands off yourself and gently pining them beside you by intertwining his fingers with yours and keeping them in place down on the bed.

He didn't give your mind time to wonder much longer as he continued his mission of kissing your entire body occasionally licking stripes on the way down that had your mind in a haze.

"You ready?" Daniel asked.

And you looked up to realize he was now in between your legs. Once again nodding Daniel continued.

He licked a stripe across your folds which made your chest rise.

"Daniel please-" You begged feeling no shame this time at the desperation in your voice.

"shh, I'll take care of you." he whispered causing his breath to hit your now most sensitive area. Goosebumps filled your entire body.

But he did, he laid another lick along your folds before diving deeper, sucking on your bud for a few seconds before licking it in all sort of directions.

You were a moaning mess above him, squeezing his hands tightly which were still intertwined with yours. You felt Daniel release on of your hands before you felt it grab one of your breasts and he began to flick your nipple with caused an overwhelming sensation across your body.

"Dan....I...I can'-t" you physically couldn't form a sentence, your entire body was consumed in pleasure.

"Yes, you can baby just let go." Daniel could feel the way your pussy twitched on his lips and he knew you were close.

"Oh my...I'm gonna-" You weren't even able to finish before you had let out a guttural moan, your back arching off the bed as your legs shivered from the first orgasm you'd had in way too long, you were sure not even your ex had ever given you an orgasm like this one in your entire relationship.

Once you were coming down from your high Daniel was already above you and in front of you placing soft kisses on your cheek and jaw. "You okay?" He asked with so much care in his voice.

You laughed. You knew you must have looked dazed but the adoration in his eyes was hard to miss which caused you to blush. "Yeah. More than okay." You admitted.

Daniel laid beside you but his body was still turned to yours.

"I want more." you realized Daniel was willing to submit his own pleasure just so you would feel comfortable, so you wouldn't feel pushed but your body ached to feel more of him.

"You don't have to, we can take it slow." Daniel stroked your hair back reassuring you.

"No Daniel, please." You leaned closer to him, your legs crossing with his and you could feel his hard member against your leg. "Please fuck me," you whispered against his lips.

Daniel thought he couldn't get turned on even more but after hearing your words he couldn't hold back anymore. He brought you closer into a deep sloppy kiss, tongues fighting for dominance.

He angled your leg up and over his waist, as he slotted himself between you, he lined himself up with you and luckily you were wet enough that he knew you didn't need lube.

But as soon as you felt his tip close to you those insecurities rose again. "Daniel you don't have a condom." You pointed out, you didn't actually need him to wear one but you wanted to make sure he realized what he was doing.

"I trust you." He looked straight into your eyes as he said so. "But if you want me to put one on I can.

It was hard to believe someone could be so kind to you, it was hard to believe someone could care so much about what you thought after being treated the opposite for so long. You shook your head.

You nodded once again for the night. "Keep going." You voiced.

Daniel brought you into a kiss again before pushing in trying to distract your mind from the sting you would feel. He was slow making sure your walls adjusted to him inch by inch listening to your moans as indications to keep going until he was fully in you.

He waited for your signal to move.

"Fuck me, Daniel." You sighed against his chest.

He began thrusting slowly, hearing your sighs of pleasure, watching and feeling the way you scratched his back and chest in pleasure.

"You like that baby?" He knew you did, he could hear and feel you did but he still wanted to hear it straight from you.

"Yeah." You moaned. "Please faster." you begged.

Daniel propped himself up on his arm before slowly turning you around so he was over you, making sure not to pull out at any point. Once you were on your back he leaned his arms on either side of your head and began thrusting into you deeper and faster.

"Oh, sh*t." You cursed as the pleasure only intensified.

"Ah, baby I'm gonna cum." Daniel moaned, the new angle proving too much for him.

"Me too." You confessed. "Sh*t."

Daniel tried to hold on until you finished so that he could continue and luckily he was able to.

"I'm cumming!" You announced and he could see the way your body shivered under him, feeling you clench around him which was making it almost impossible for him to hold on, after he could tell your orgasm was done he pulled out.

He was ready to cum on your stomach but was completely taken aback when you quickly sat up pulling him closer and into your mouth.

As soon as your lips touched his dick he came inside your mouth, grunting at each spurt that pulsed out of his member watching you take all of it in your mouth.

"Fuck that's hot." He groaned at the last drips that came out of him, watching you lick his tip clean before swallowing.

"Yum." You licked your lips clean with a smile on your face.

"Fuck I love you," Daniel spoke before collapsing beside you.

"What?" You propped yourself up on your elbows to face him.

"What?" Daniel was confused.

"What did you say?" your heart was beating fast again and it wasn't just because of the amazing sex you'd just had.

"Oh." Daniel's eyes widened realizing the words that had come out of his mouth. "Oh, sh*t that wasn't supposed to happen like that."

"Wait, do you mean it?" You sat up this time.

Daniel joined you sitting up and leaning against the headboard. Daniel couldn't help but smile at your incredulity of his words despite everything you'd just done. He pulled you onto his lap.

"Of course I mean it. I love you and I've been trying to find a way to tell you for a while now." He confessed. "And this wasn't the way I planned it, it was definitely more romantic." he laughed.

You were in disbelief, overwhelmed by all the emotions that flooded your mind and body. You couldn't find the words to reply to Daniel, to let him know the way he made you feel so you simply leaned forward and kissed him. It wasn't sloppy, it wasn't deep but it was soft and slow as if you were communicating everything to him through it.

You pulled away needing to breathe. "I love you." you finally whispered back. "I love you so much." You watched the way his lips curled into a smile.

"Thank you for trusting me." He hugged you into his chest.

"Thank you for believing me." You thanked him back finding warmth and safety against his chest.

Yes, despite the fact that you finally felt loved again, you once again felt comfortable within yourself you knew one thing. You wanted no one else in the world to touch you or to look at you this way again except for Daniel.

#Daniel Ricciardo #formula 1 #f1 x reader #f1 smut #daniel ricciardo smut #dr3 #smut #f1fic #f1 one shot #f1 drivers #f1 #f1 fluff #f1 x y/n

[jo-harrington]

Sunsets.

They were always better when you watched them with someone else.

You glanced down at the hands in your lap: yours and Sam's, twined together like your lives have been for the past 5 years. The best of friends from the moment her family moved into town. You couldn't remember a time when you existed without her.

She's chatting now, telling some story about her boyfriend's dunce behavior to cheer you up after Mark broke your heart. Douchebag. You don't really know how you got here of all places; how things seemed to go so right with him and then so terribly wrong.

Sam made a joke at both Patrick and Mark's expense. You laughed and the sound of it was unfamiliar and almost roared in your ear, like a hundred people were laughing.

Everyone always laughed at Sam's jokes. Everyone loved Sam. Everything always worked out for her, even in the most unlikely situations. She was just lucky like that.

You told her once, after she won the talent show at school, that it almost seemed like she was the star of The Samantha Show or something. She found it hilarious, apparently, but you had an inkling that her feelings were still hurt. This was real life, not TV. She didn't just win because she was some main character, she worked really hard on her dance routine.

You felt a little bad after that, never brought it up again. The dark little voice deep down inside you smothered for now.

Because yeah, she did work hard. You knew that. She was smart and talented and funny and caring and a great friend and neighbor and that's just how it was because...

Because...

Because she strived to be all of those thing.

Things you…really didn’t bother with.

Because you were…

You.

Average, squeaking by a three-point-something GPA, wannabe artist who could barely draw, never left town before even when there was that field trip to DC because you got the mumps. A little nervous, a little clumsy, a little romantic with your head in the clouds. You always had a crush but nothing ever really came of those crushes until Mark.

The only boy to ever like you back and then he broke your heart.

“I just want to disappear,” you muttered pathetically and let go of Sam’s hand to cover your eyes again.

"So do it!" Sam finally hopped to her feet in the way that only she could, raring for another passioned, motivational speech that she was known for. You really needed one of those and also loathed that she was about to give you one. "Disappear! Leave!”

This was not the speech you expected.

"Uh, what?" you let out a mixture of a scoff and a laugh, tears forgotten for now. "What do you mean leave? Hello, graduation in a few months. Prom? Then college. What happened to your big plan last week? One last summer in Port Geneva?"

"Forget one last summer," she waved her arms wildly. "This is your life! You're my best friend, I want you happy. Tell me the truth. Do you really even want to go to college? Wouldn't you rather pack up big blue and go on that adventure like you talked about in 8th grade?"

At your blank stare, Sam grabbed you by the shoulders and shook you.

"That's the whole reason we're friends in the first place don't you remember? The ice breaker?! Are you kidding?"

"I don't have a clue," you giggled as she jostled you around.

"Our entire friendship built on a lie. UGH. Ok. Mrs. Mills what-do-you-wanna-do-in-10-years activity? And everyone's was stupid. Tina wanted to be on the cover of Tiger Beat for the Girl Superstar issue. Patrick...gotta love him...but he wanted to be the starting quarterback for the Miami Dolphins. Mine was so dumb I don't even want to say it, great first impressions I made as the new kid.

"But you wanted to see the world! Pack your bags and board a train around the US. Paint the sunset at the Grand Canyon. See glaciers in Alaska! Hell, you even said you'd travel to Middle Earth if you could. And I thought you meant the equator!"

You both laughed and as she went on and on about things you apparently said 4 years ago and as the memory came back to you, your heart ached.

Yeah, you did say that stuff didn't you? You’d been such a silly, idealistic kid before you grew up and reality hit you time and time again.

"That was just kids stuff Sammie," you laughed dismissively. "I'm...I'm gonna take classes at State, and I'm gonna work at the furniture store and I'm gonna..."

"You're gonna pine over Mark Greckman over the rest of your life?" The hands were on her hips again. "No, ma'am, you...you're gonna go on your adventure and...oh my...you're gonna find a prince of some European kingdom or...or a handsome stranger in an Italian villa. Or both. Hoards of men fighting for your affection."

"Please stop," you stood up and grabbed her as she started waving her arms around and pantomiming kissing a tall stranger. "Stop it."

"Ok I'm done, I'm done," she promised. "I just don't want you to be crying over that idiot anymore. And we might be close to graduation but...I don't know...you can still change your mind."

"Hmm," you shrugged. "I dunno. If just sounds so…”

“Unlike you?”

“Yeah.”

"Just think about it," she urged you. "You and your Volkswagen Beetle…and the world...the whole universe if you want it! The possibilities are endless. I just feel like...1985...it's gonna be your year."

There was a spark of inspiration that grew inside of you, and in your heart, you knew she was right.

You pulled her into your arms, grateful to have your best friend.

"Port Geneva was filmed in front of a live studio audience."

Eddie hit the rewind button on the remote and watched the scene speed in reverse until it hit Sam’s big speech. He hit play and watched for a minute then paused, the blurry image of your giggling face frozen on his screen for the foreseeable future.

He sighed and leaned back on the couch to enjoy your company for a minute.

The living room was dark, only illuminated by the glow of the TV and the street lights outside shining through the windows. There was a stack of tapes on the coffee table, along with his abandoned homework. The pizza he ordered would be here soon but for now…it was just you and him.

“M’sorry Mark was an asshole,” he said aloud into the still room. “To be honest…I kind of warned you about him way back.”

You don’t say anything. You never do.

“I know, the heart wants what it wants.” He picked a piece of lint off of his jeans. “I just want to look out for you honey.”

You stay smiling on the screen, and he can imagine it got the slightest bit bigger when he said that.

“I know you try to look after me too. Guess that doesn’t stop either of us getting hurt right?” He chuckled and pat his hands on his lap.

This was pathetic, talking to a fictional character like they were really in the room with him.

You were just…you were everything. And you’d been there for him, a balm to his woes. You had been since he started watching Port Geneva way back when, but especially since everything went down last year.

With his dad and the house and…

There was a knock at the door and Eddie hit the eject button so he could put in the next tape in watch with dinner. It was gonna be a good episode, you tell Mark off and even punch him; he remembered it fondly.

Defending yourself. He was proud of his girl.

Eddie ate his dinner and watched his episodes, taped from when they originally aired. Wednesday nights at 9pm, right before the news. He did his homework and occasionally repeated the rewind-pause-play act that he had perfected over the years so he could make another joke or, just once, complain about his chemistry homework.

Life was hard. For everyone. But especially if your name was Eddie Munson. Still, he endured. He’d never been a stranger to fantasy and escapism, he had his books and his game and his movies but there was something so…comforting in the realism that was your show.

A small suburban town full of normals. All sorts of mundane activities that mostly everyone made feel were…life altering events. And a handful of misunderstood outcasts—like you and Scott and Bonnie—who played supporting characters to the stars. Stars that were, quite frankly, unrealistic and annoying.

Eddie felt that way sometimes though, like he was just some background character waiting for his chance at the spotlight. Who had been the main character in his story, huh? Ronnie? Yeah…he could see that, now that she was on her great college adventure.

But with her gone, what would come of his storyline? Did he just fade into the background again?

Eddie ejected the tape before the current episode finished and propped his feet on the coffee table as he flipped the channels to something else. He needed to focus on something else. He would come back to his tapes, to you, another night and he would wish that you were real once again. Knocking on his door, taking him on a grand adventure with you.

But for now he just needed to stew in his…sad secondary character thoughts.

You got your time in the spotlight, a 2-episode arc at the end of the season, and as much as he hoped that it would be his turn soon…to be the character everyone loved…the person everyone loved…he knew it might never happen for him.

Eddie the Freak. Eddie the outcast. Eddie the idiot.

He would even take a single scene dedicated to him at this point.

Was that too much to ask?

Coming in 2024.

Find the Masterlist here. And the original blurb here.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fluff #Eddie Munson angst #stranger than (fan)fiction #eddie munson #Stranger things fic

[theold-ultraviolence]

Hii Irma😁

Did ppl even go on honeymoons back in yee old westeros?!?! Doesn't matter cause Aemond is taking his lovely wife on a honeymoon away from the prying eyes of the red keep

idk much of the world lore so idk exactly where they'd go maybe he'd have a cabin built for them in a beautiful forrest where the above image happens along with adorable horny shenanigans

ilovethismansomuchitsstupidhowattractediamtohim

Nothing Else Matters

Aemond Targaryen x fem!reader

A/N: CEE!! you always come through with the absolute BEST ideas. I love you and your big brain. Hope you like this!! CW: PIV sex, unprotected sex, creampie, sex in a lake. Words: 2k.

You’d been betrothed far too young and married soon after. 

Mere children you were, too innocent to comprehend just what love could feel like; if it was even real and not just a figment of a bard’s song. That it could indeed be present in a marriage. Yet you were mature enough to know that such an arrangement was a duty to honor and uphold for the sake of the kingdom. A matter of politics, nothing else. 

At least something remained unburdened between prince Aemond and you: your friendship. 

Never did either of you question the order of things, nor complain about the betrothal, for you’d always been best friends. 

You’d been close to Aemond since you can recall, were right there with him – and for him –  when he’d lost his eye. When he felt the betrayal from his own kin, it was you whom he had deemed worthy to safekeep his trust, and who continued to do so faithfully through the years of marital life that followed. 

As long as you two stuck together, nothing else mattered. 

Thus seasons passed. 

The sunrises lead to sunsets that painted everything liquid gold and gave ordinary people angelic halos around their hair that could lead anyone to believe that otherworldly things existed, such as love in a marriage. 

And it was in those kinds of moments, with the evening dew rising in the atmosphere and a comforting scent imprinted on pillows and sheets, soon Aemond and you learned that some rituals imposed could be blessings in disguise. 

As soon as the both of you were conscious of the truth that sneaked into your hearts as you grew older, you decided to find the time to celebrate the year in which you were bound together, in your own ways, hidden away from all prying eyes of the Red Keep or even all of King’s Landing. 

The first time, all you did was drink the finest of wines in your shared bedchamber, with your feet bare and nothing but your night clothes, sitting in front of the hearth while sharing stories and gossip like mischievous children reclaiming their right to be silly within the impenetrable walls of stone you grew up in. 

Another year, you wore a set of cloaks and visited the Street of Flour in King’s Landing to buy freshly baked treats – even wandering around a tavern and watching a show, forgetting all about the royal titles that mandated where you should or shouldn’t be. 

Then another, amidst conflict and tensions rising, your energy only allowed for a moment of rest; the whole day spent in bed and nothing more. 

During an aimless flight with Vaghar, Aemond came across an abandoned forest that he didn’t recognize from the maps that he’s studied so thoroughly. Maybe he’d even landed on a magical portal, looking at the wide, crystalline lake that surrounded the land, as blue as his sapphire eye and so crystalline that he could see the clouds above, mirrored in sharp detail. More proof of the otherwordly.

In front of it, he found a cabin, built right from the trunk of a tree, with no apparent sign of life inhabiting it. On his way back home, he couldn’t wait to tell you – and then,  show you. 

Now, a couple of years afterwards, the little cabin is fully equipped with a spacious bed and a rug. You didn’t need much, when all the other resources could be hunted down and gathered from the surroundings – didn’t need much but each other.

Nothing else mattered except for this faraway sanctuary that you’d found, where you’re able to commemorate another year in blissful solitude. 

No prying eyes, drunken siblings, or uninvited remarks. 

Nothing matters but the sight of you bathing in the lake, as Aemond sits by the edge of it, focusing on turning twigs and logs into a blazing fire.

He’s in nothing but a silk robe that covers his flushed skin after he’d vigorously fucked you just a moment ago – eyepatch discarded ever since, too, so that he could be eased by the soft kiss of the cold wind on his face.

His nerves are still buzzing from having been buried deep inside of you, with your legs firmly enveloped around his lower back to pull him ever so close to you – memories that flash as he sees your figure floating on the water, just basking in it until you feel it growing warm. Those same, gorgeous legs looking longer as the calm waves that pillow you refract the light – all languid and well spent and so inviting. 

He’d jump right in there with you, but the sight you make is too beautiful to disrupt, so he just sits there mesmerized. 

You’re a siren, straight out of mythology, when you submerge into the water to then surge upwards, with your hair splayed back and curves glistening with droplets that look like diamonds with the way the sun reflects on your skin. 

You turn to look at him from over your shoulder with an impish smirk, before you face him completely and bless him with the image of your breasts and your torso dripping wet, which makes his mouth water and his heart take on a galloping speed. 

You swim closer to Aemond, sultrily calling to him,  “Māzigon, valzȳrys.”

Come, husband…you even speak as an enchantress would, and he can’t deny that he’s spellbound.  

“Come join me, Aemond,” you curl your finger for him to come hither, but he remains in place, still watching – always watching, pondering. 

There’s a tenderness that he feels when he sees you smile in such a mischievous way. He remembers the girl he’d befriended a long time ago, now the woman that he swears his devotion to, be it on his knees or linked in hand during royal affairs. His heart contracts thinking about how, even if you live to see one hundred years together, you’ll still remain his precious childhood friend. 

“You look so peaceful in there, ābrazȳrys.” 

You throw your head back laughing, teasing him with the ravishing line of your neck. “Can’t we be peaceful together?” 

Aemond chuckles to himself, gaze turning a little bit darker. “I can’t guarantee there’ll be peace if I go in there with you.”   

“Then do what you must, husband. Who’s stopping you?” 

“Hmmm.” He looks down with a smirk, considering the crackling embers of the fire by his side: scorching heat like the coiling in his loins.

Then back up at you: soft, yet wild like a watercolor painting.

Is he in the mood for rough ventures or sweet ones? 

With one quieter humm he rises to his feet, looking straight at you with utmost potency as he shoulders off his robe and discards it to the side to enter the water and swim right to you, gathering you in his arms. 

You giggle as you wrap your arms around him, flashing him with your pearly white teeth and juicy lips that he tastes immediately, before letting himself float on his back, taking you alongside. 

You traverse the water like two mating swans, gliding gracefully while locked in a loving kiss. 

Right before he takes a deep breath and sinks underwater, to rise dramatically and lift you up by surprise, making you cackle unabashedly – in a way you’d never be allowed to do back home, but so reminiscent of your childlike innocence.

“Keligon, valzȳrys!” You beg him to stop between your shared laughter. 

He relents just so he could gather you up in his arms once more, carrying you like a precious babe, so you can lean your head back and soak up your hair while grinning to the sky above. 

Aemond nears the shore until he’s able to plant his feet in the soil beneath, and fully support you as you maneuver your legs to wrap around his waist while your arms snake securely around his neck. You nuzzle the crook of it, the underside of his jaw, card your fingers through his damp, silver locks while the tip of your nose grazes the shell of his ear.

“Take me please, dear husband.” You whisper against his temple, earning you a deep humm and the searing feeling of his hard cock bumping against your tummy.   

“As you wish, my lady.” He murmurs, with a dilated gaze and lustful mouth as he kisses you with all the emotions he can’t quite convey through spoken word. 

You take his erection in hand, giving it a few pumps to drink in his quiet moans, feel it throbbing and ready to let gravity work its magic and wrap him up to the hilt with your fluttering cunt. 

You hiss in surprise, never growing fully accustomed to the great size of him buried deep inside – so deep that your clit can rub against his taut pelvis, graze against the coarse blonde hairs on his navel. 

Aemond’s legs are so strong he’s able to thrust into you without problem, even though the water is a fine aid – he fucks you sweetly, deliberately, letting you float before tensing his legs and core each time that you come down onto him and make his thrusts hit you harder, deeper. 

“Aemond, Aemond, Aemond…” you blabber on his name like a prayer to whatever deity guards these woods, nails digging into the pale freckles scattered across his muscled back.

“What do you want, my darling?” he moans your title in High Valyrian, “ābrazȳrys…” as he walks back to where there’s a slight elevation in the ground so that he can hike up a leg and piston in even deeper, pulling groans right out of your gut, for his slick head keeps bumping and grazing your g-spot in a way that makes your vision go white. 

“Ohh, yes…I want…” 

“Use your words, ābrazȳrys,” he snickers, and you roll your eyes because how dare he. How dare he ask for the very thing he seldom gives, especially when he has you in such a fevered state, knowing the water cannot soothe you, for it had turned warm hours ago, the longer you spent in it. 

“Ahh, I…I want to cum, dear husband.” 

“Hmmm…” 

You whimper when his pace slows down. 

It’s torture. 

Needless torture, this game that he plays.

But he wants to see your pleading eyes first.

So he redirects your gaze, holding your jaw in his hand and making you look at him – not the moon creeping up early through the clouds, not the marvelous greenery surrounding you. 

No, Aemond needs to see your pupils blown with ardor, your slack jaw and your salivating mouth and your raging pulse that makes your breath quicken and nipples all perked up, glistening with droplets of water, for the lake water splashes your chest each time you bounce on his cock.  

When he sees you weakened with unbearable pleasure, does he take mercy.

His grip on your back tightens, the muscles of his legs contract to plunge inside of you harder, harder, harder – 

– Until you collapse with a hysterical groan, throwing your head back and tattooing crescent moons on his shoulder blades. 

He snakes both arms around your hips, gluing you to him to fill you to the brim with his cum and not let any drop spill and ruin the iridescent waters that envelop you.  

“I’d say…” you sigh, opening your eyes to see the gorgeous image that Aemond makes with his blushing skin, lax muscles and half-lidded eye. “I’d say this has been one of the best anniversaries, my prince.” 

“Right as always, ñuha gevie ābrazȳrys” 

My beautiful wife. 

The gal of this man, you swear.

He speaks in the language of his ancestors and you can’t help but contract your walls around him, feeling him start to harden once more. His stamina is truly god-like. 

How could you have guessed such a thing, knowing what a calm boy he used to be. 

Nothing else matters but this truth that only the two of you know; how childhood friendship can endure, that a marriage pact can evolve.

And what the two of you share, in life and in this moment. 

And what you plan on doing for the rest of the afternoon.

#aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen fanfiction #aemond targaryen smut #hotd #house of the dragon fanfiction #reader insert #female reader #my writing #ewan mitchell

[86babyswhxre]

Push Comes to Shove

Eddie x Henderson!Reader (fem)

Warnings: Angst, slight fluff, suggestion of smut, hurt/comfort, ex!Billy, mentions of abusive relationships, mention of blood, minor violence, 18+/nsfw

Word Count: 4k

Summary: Eddie loses his temper for the first time with a fragile y/n, bringing up old memories of her past.

Author’s note: This is literally the first fic I’ve written since I was probably like 15 so bear with me but Eddie just has my whole heart. Any feedback would be appreciated.

Part 2

Push Comes to Shove:

You and Eddie had been together for nearly 6 months now. It was coming up to that half year mark next week and your stomach had butterflies every time you thought about the relationship you two had built.

But it didn’t exactly start out well. Before the two of you got together you had a distanced but tumultuous acquaintanceship. As Dustin’s sister you had felt incredibly protective of your baby brother when he moved up to high school, and even more so when he joined Hellfire. It seemed to turn Dustin and his friend’s obsession with D&D into something wholly more consuming than when they used to play it in Wheeler’s basement.  You hadn’t been able to find it in yourself to like Eddie upon first meeting, blaming him entirely for the fixation Dustin, Mike and Lucas had on the club. You knew it wasn’t evil or dangerous like the news sometimes liked to pretend it was, but that didn’t mean you had to like the group’s leader, Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson.

You had been in the same school year as Eddie before you graduated and knew him to have a bit of a reputation, not necessarily a bad one, but a reputation none the less. During your senior year you shared only one class together and were in completely different social spheres. Eddie had his gang of nerds, for lack of a better word, and you had your small friendship group of girls not quite popular enough for parties and not quite nerdy enough to never leave the library. Regardless, your interactions were limited but you still knew of the metalhead.

Last year, however, your lack of high social ranking within the confines of the school halls hadn’t stopped you from dating bad boy Billy Hargrove. Your relationship with Billy was bad. He treated you (and everyone else) like shit. Within the 10 months of you being together he had you constantly on edge. Always wondering when his next violent temper would hit him, and eventually, hit you. The only thing that got you out of the relationship was Billy’s ‘boredom’ with you and his desire to get out of Hawkins to find ‘real women’, in his words. When he did, it took you some time, but eventually it was like a weight lifted off your shoulders and you could dig yourself out of the shell that Billy had put you in, just in time for finals. You had felt like a whole different person by the time you graduated.

And perhaps that was why you were suspicious of Eddie with his reputation for being outlandish, a drug dealer and a bit crazy. Billy had notoriety for similar things, and he was bad. The red flags had been up when you first heard Dustin had joined the D&D club.

Your little brother, however, had endlessly tried to convince you that Eddie was a good guy, and eventually you came to realise it too. It wasn’t until you saw in person Eddie’s charming and kind-hearted nature and how he adored your brother and his friends that you realised little Dustin was right. He wasn’t crazy – he was passionate. He wasn’t outlandish – he was fun. But he definitely was still a drug dealer. Pretty soon after that you started crushing on Eddie. Hard. And it didn’t take long for that crush to escalate into something more. One night you had stayed after Hellfire, having given in to Dustin’s desperate pleas for you to watch just one night of the new campaign. You were impressed and incredibly turned on at how Eddie had commanded the room. Even his weird elvish voices lit something in you aflame. Dustin had decided to go home with Mike and Nancy, who had picked the boys up, and you were left alone to help Eddie pack away. It had started with some compliments, a sprinkle of flirty banter, and somehow ended with Eddie bending you over the tables and the many figurines scattered atop it. You swore you still had some of the indents from where the figurines had dug into your stomach as your now boyfriend had fucked you for the first time. Ever since then your relationship blossomed, much to your little brother’s equal disgust and delight.

Thankfully, Eddie was utterly different from Billy in every way. He was gentle, but rough when you wanted him to be. He was kind and thoughtful and treated you with so much respect and love that it sometimes brought a tear to your eye. You loved him entirely too much to comprehend and you were never alone in those feelings. The future for you and Eddie was bright. He made you finally feel safe.

It was Thursday night after Hellfire and you had stayed to watch as Eddie introduced a new campaign to the gang, after being utterly mesmerised by his incredible imagination and theatrics, you had come back to his trailer with him.

“Honestly y/n, I was so nervous, they just expect so much from me y’know? And I never know if I can deliver that,” Eddie confessed as you walked from his van to the trailer door.

“You know they love whatever you do, Eds. The day Dustin shuts up about the depth of the characters you make will be the day pigs fly. Trust me, you could just make your entire campaign the plot of those Star Wars films and they’d still go mad.”

“Ahh I don’t know about that y/n” he laughed, “George Lucas aint got shit on me.” He smiled as he turned to you, his big brown eyes lighting up with humour as he placed a swift kiss on your lips and opened the trailer door. Even now his kisses still made your stomach somersault.

The trailer had become a second home to you, in fact you probably spent more time here than your own house. Wayne was out working most of the time, so it sometimes felt like you and Eddie had a little taster of domestic bliss together.

“Okay, I’m thinking we do pizza, a joint, a movie and then I wanna be in your arms from now until morning,” he said with a wink to you as he put his stuff down and emptied his backpack on the countertop.

“Sounds perfect!” You said kicking off your shoes with a stupid grin that hadn’t been able to leave your face for the past few months.

You weren’t one for smoking before you met Eddie and you still didn’t indulge much in it, but you liked the buzz you got, it helped you relax. It also helped that Eddie always looked so hot smoking. It was the way his hands would roll the joint, his fingers so nimble and capable of so much, most of it pleasurable. Plus, it felt like you should celebrate Eddie’s successful launch of his new campaign. It had taken weeks and weeks of prep for him, even risking a few bad grades (which he really couldn’t afford if he wanted to graduate this year) and now he was having to put in double time in Mrs Clicks class if he was ever going to scrape a passing grade.

“I’m gonna go get changed, will you grab us a drink and I’ll be back in a minute, baby?”

“Sure, you want a beer?” You shouted after him as he walked to his end of the trailer.

“I’d love one,” He called back to you.

After 6 months of your relationship, you were now able to expertly navigate your way round Eddie’s home. You grabbed you and Eddie a beer each from the fridge and tried to crack them open with the bottle opener on his key ring. The tops were really stuck on though, they must have been in the refrigerator for some time, and it took a good amount of pulling to open the first one and the second one was worse. You got the top open eventually, but the bottle slipped from your hand from the force and spilt directly over Eddie’s campaign notebook, rolling onto the floor and smashing, knocking the other bottle on the book as it went.  

“No, no, no” you muttered to yourself as you watched the beer seep into the pages – why had he left it open!

Panicking, you grabbed the nearest dishtowel and started to try and wipe the liquid off the thing that Eddie prized most, except his guitar off course, but you were only making it worse.

“Fuck!” The beer and towel combination wiping and smudging Eddie’s written words about, making it all completely unreadable. “Please no” you kept muttering trying to wipe it up but not helping at all, it had seeped into the pages, ruining every one of them with splodges of ink. How could beer do so much damage you thought to yourself. Eddie’s endless work was completely ruined, and it was all your fault. Your eyes started to well with tears.

You gasped as you heard Eddie come back into the room.

“Is everything okay y/n?” His eyes caught your watery ones and your sunken face, he looked down and saw the mess you had made, and he saw red immediately.

“What the fuck y/n?” He shouted, making you jump.

“What the fuck have you done?” He stormed round the countertop to get to where you, and his ruined masterpiece stood, his shoes crunching over the broken glass on the floor.

“I-I-I,” you attempted to explain but you were frozen and couldn’t get your words out.

“Do you know how fucking long this took me to write? It’s completely fucked y/n! Why the fuck would you do this?” He shouted, holding up the sopping pages by the corner in front of your face. They looked as if they could fall apart, and you felt like you were about to too. You had never seen Eddie’s eyes so full of rage or his body language so tense and furious.

“I didn’t mean to, it was an accident, I couldn’t open the bottle and it spilt everywhere. I’m so so sorry, Eddie.”

“I can’t fucking believe this, how stupid actually are you, y/n? You couldn’t have just fucking waited til I got back to help. Look what you’ve done!”

“I didn’t know it was going to spill like that, I swear.” You tried to tell him, his words making your stomach sink as you tried to cower away from his rage.

“I don’t give a fuck!” His voice so loud, every time he spoke it made you jump. “I’ve put my whole self into this and you just go a mess it up in 2 minutes. You’re so fucking useless y/n I can’t even ask you to do one thing without fucking it up! You’re an absolute joke!” His words physically stung, his voice so loud as he turned through the near crumbling and sopping wet pages of what was once his work. You had never heard Eddie like this before, had never seen him lose his temper, at least not at you and not at this level. You were beyond terrified right now.

You did what you always tried to do and attempted to fix it and help him, you leant over the book on the counter Eddie had thrown it onto and, hands trembling, attempted to get his hands away from it so you could help.

“If we put it on the heater it might dr-“

“No! Piss off y/n, you’re just gonna make it worse!” He yelled and he pushed you away with his elbow, not hard, but enough to knock you into the counter and your left foot onto one of the shards of broken green glass. The pain cut through you immediately.

“Ow! Eddie I-“

“Shut up y/n!” He turned to you, with a venom in his eyes that you could feel tearing at your heart, he looked wild and the glass that had cut into your foot was stinging and starting to bleed. You couldn’t understand where this had come from, where his temper had suddenly sprung from after all this time, and it scared you shitless. You tried to shrink yourself away expecting another explosion of rage and eventual violence any second, it was all you knew when men got angry, and he hadn’t exactly shown you he would be different right now.

“Just leave me alone for minute so I can try and sort out this shit show you’ve made, fucks sake.” Eddies voice was usually so full of softness that it calmed you on your worst days but now it was making the trembling in your hands ten times worse.

“Eddie I’m sorry,” You pleaded, tears falling from your eyes as you tried to reach out your hand as a comfort on his shoulder.

“Seriously y/n. Fuck. OFF!”

And so, you walked away, carefully to avoid stepping in any more glass, and heard him mutter “stupid bitch” as you made your way towards the bathroom.

You walked into the bathroom, foot stinging, eyes watering insistently, but your whole body felt numb. The only feeling you had was a pit in the bottom of your stomach that felt all too familiar. Instinctively, you were shutting yourself down. It was what you always had to do with Billy, with it really ever being the only way you could stop yourself from feeling the hurt of his words or his fist. But you didn’t expect to have to do it with Eddie. He was supposed to be different. His words kept replaying in your head, how he was so quick to anger and be so cruel. Where had that come from? You didn’t want to risk that happening again.

Your breathing was shallow and quick as you sat yourself on the toilet seat and went to take your sock off your bleeding foot. Eyes constantly blurring with tears, you wiped them as much as you could and tried to calm your breathing with deep breaths. Wincing, you pulled your previously white and now crimson sock off. The cut was a lot deeper than it felt, but your body was going into survival mode so it didn’t surprise you that you could only feel a sliver of the pain that you should have been feeling.

This wasn’t the first time you had to deal with a cut, so you knew what to do in a pinch. Taking some toilet paper (disposable so your blood wouldn’t stain anything), you stood up and wet a big wad of it under the tap and began to clean the area of your foot of as much blood as you could. It was still seeping from the wound but less so now. So, with a sharp intake of breath, you applied pressure to where the glass had bit into your skin, hoping to clot the blood and stop it from making any more mess. You looked at the floor and saw drops of blood littered on the vinyl flooring.

“Fuck,” you muttered, not wanting to face the repercussions of that if Eddie came in here but knowing it could wait.

Your mind couldn’t stop replaying what just happened and you couldn’t stop the tears from falling as you sobbed softly to yourself. You were trying to be quiet, listening out for Eddie but you heard nothing, which perhaps worried you more.

You got up, looking for any form of anti-septic cream and sitting back down once you found a small near empty tube in the cabinet. You made a mental note to buy a new tube just in case.

Squeezing the cream out, you placed it as gently as you could on your foot hoping it would help, knowing it would eventually but certainly not feeling like it at that moment.

You sat there for several minutes until there was a knock on the bathroom door, making you jump.

“Ju-Just a minute,” you shouted out, your voice cracking and stumbling over the words.

You weren’t given a minute, however, as the door smacked open, Eddie walking in after it. Every noise seemed to have on high alert.

“Oops sorry y/n.” He looked like your normal Eddie now. His pupils weren’t so blown and his breathing not so rapid. But you didn’t see any of that at that moment, fear still instilled in you.

“I’m so sorry Eddie, I didn’t mean to. I won’t be a second and I’ll get out of here, I’m sorry, I’ll clean everything up in a minute, I didn’t mean to do it and I won’t do it again, I’m really sorry, I promise it was an accident.” You rambled on, not able to look your Eddie in the eye, trying to back yourself up as much as you could against the toilet tank.

The next time you looked up; Eddie was squatting in front of you.

He was looking up at you through his thick eyelashes, eyes slightly hidden by the mop of his fringe. Your eyes searched his swiftly looking for any remaining rage. There was none there, but your breaths hadn’t calmed. Billy used to do this all the time. He’d come after you, playing nice and loving only for it to get worse after that, you knew the tricks that men played.

Eddie reached out slowly to touch your cheek and you flinched away slightly.

“Oh baby,” Eddies heart had dropped, “I’m the one who’s sorry. I don’t know why I got so angry. It’s just that I’d been working on that for so long and I panicked.” The soft pad of his thumb was stroking your damp cheek, his tone so gentle it broke your heart.

“No, it was my fault. You’re right I can’t be left alone to do anything, but I won’t do it again I swear.” Your chest was heaving, you could see he was calm, but you didn’t want to risk angering him again with any wrong words. In all his time knowing you, Eddie had never seen you look so scared: your face was 10 shades paler than usual, your eyes so full of terror and tears, your whole body shaking and you were one movement away from practically curling yourself into a ball.

“Sweetheart, it’s okay. It was an accident. Breathe y/n. Breathe.” Listening to his words, you started to take deep, shaky breaths. “God I’m so fucking sorry. I shouldn’t have reacted like that, it was an accident. I know it was. I’m sorry for getting angry. It’s all in my head anyway, not like I can’t just write it down again right? It’s okay y/n, I’m not mad I swear.” Reassurance and tenderness echoed so wholly in his words that you couldn’t not believe him, and so  your breathing started to calm down and your tears ceased to fall.

“Y/N I’m so sorry for making you panic like that and for what I said, I didn’t mean it. You mean everything to me, way more than a stupid notepad with words on it, okay?” He prompted.

“Yeah. Yeah, okay.” You replied, nodding your head gently and meeting his eyes. Staring back at you was the sincerest expression you had ever seen Eddie wear and you knew you could relax. In your head a mantra formed of ‘he’s not like Billy, he’s not like Billy’, and you knew it to be true.

Eddie took a moment to look down at your foot, seeing the drops of blood on the floor and the red soaked tissues scattered around you.

“Fuck, y/n. Are you okay?” He asked, holding up your foot gently to inspect the cause of the mess.

“Yeah, Eddie it’s fine, it’s only a small cut, I’ll be okay,” placing your hand on his shoulder and rubbing gently as his head fell in your lap.

“God I’m so sorry.” You could hear his voice breaking and you knew tears would be staining his cheeks any moment now.

“Hey, hey – it’s okay, I’ll be fine,” you reassured him, lifting his chin to meet yours. He sniffled and nodded, leaning into your touch.

A few moments passed and Eddie stood up, taking a deep breath and reaching his hand out for you to take. “Right, I’m gonna clean all this up. Let’s get you somewhere comfortable.”

“No, Eddie, please I’ll do it.”

His reply of ‘No’ was curt and he gave you a stern look that told you that he was going to deal with this and you couldn’t help but feel better. He’s not like Billy. He’s not like Billy.

Eddie helped you stand up, both of you wincing as you went, and he guided you out of the bathroom and into his bedroom. Holding onto your waist, he supported you as you made sure not to put weight on where the cut was on the bottom of your foot, which certainly wasn’t easy.

After helping you settle on the bed, Eddie grabbed a shirt for you to wear as pyjamas and gave it to you. It was one of your favourite Metallica shirts he owned, it smelt of him and cigarettes – a killer combination.

“Get changed, okay baby. I’ll be back in a sec.”

You did as he said and changed out of your top, bra and jeans so you were left with just Eddie’s shirt and your panties on. As you were just shuffling up to rest against the headboard, Eddie came back into his room brandishing a smile, clean, damp paper towels, a bandage, the last remaining bit of anti-septic cream and a Hershey’s bar (your favourite). He’s not like Billy. He’s not like Billy, you reminded yourself and you could see that clearly. Billy would never have done this for you, he always just left you to cry yourself to sleep as he stormed out his house whenever you two had an argument. Eddie was different, Eddie was safe.

Your boyfriend perched on the end of his bed and pulled your foot into his lap, moving as tenderly as was humanly possible. He passed you the chocolate and inaudibly sighed in relief when you took it with a grin.

“Thank you,” you whispered to him with a shy smile, which he returned.

“Right, let’s clean you up properly.”

You nodded at him and opened up the chocolate, sitting against the headboard and taking a bite as Eddie started to gently wipe up the remaining bits of blood and old cream off your foot. His hands were being so careful that you would have barely noticed his movements if you weren’t watching him intently. His hands, fingertips calloused from years of playing the guitar, were so soft on you that you felt yourself growing sleepy. Eddie finished cleaning up and added some fresh anti-septic cream to your cut, which he now realised was deeper than what you had made it out to be and he set his intention on taking you to the hospital first thing in the morning to get it looked at properly. But not now, you’d been through too much. After finishing wrapping you foot up in a bandage, he placed a light kiss on your ankle and smiled up at you. Your heart melted.

“Thank you,” you murmured to him.

“You don’t need to thank me, y/n. I’m just so fucking sorry I acted that way and will do anything and everything I can to make it up to you. I promise you don’t need to worry about me ever acting that way again. I promise I’ll be better.”

You just nodded as you looked down at him and started to shift to stand up.

“Where are you going?” Eddie asked, placing a hand on your ankle to hold you in place.

“Uh, I need to clean up the mess in the kitchen?”

“No, babe I sorted that earlier don’t worry about it.”

“Oh… When?”

“Umm, I think right after I told you to fuck off, which I’m insanely sorry about by the way, I realised I was acting like a crazy person and cleaned everything up.”

“Oh. Okay. Thanks.” He’s not like Billy, he’s not like Billy.

“It’s quite literally the very least I could do.” Eddie stood up and started to get changed into his pyjamas. Well, you say pyjamas, it was more like just his boxers and nothing else, and eventually climbed into bed next to you.

You felt unbelievably tired after all the new emotions and resurfaced memories, and you were glad he was keen to get to bed too. He pulled you down and tucked you under his arm as he pressed a kiss to your forehead and whispered “try to sleep now, Y/n. We’ll talk properly in the morning. I love you.”

“I love you too,” you whispered, eyes already drooping closed. You slept soundly mostly, with Eddies breath warming your neck where he had burrowed himself into you. But that night you dreamt of Billy for the first time in a long time.

A/N – part 2 is out!

#Eddie munson #eddie x reader #eddie munson oneshot #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson angst #stranger things 4 #stranger things angst

[rockalillygirl]

Murderbot Holding Hands

(Minor spoilers alert for Artificial Condition, Rogue Protocol, Exit Strategy pls check the tags)

First real post because I’m shy. Don’t know why it’s going to be a hyper-specific murderbot meta but here we go:

I’ve been rereading all the books after finishing System Collapse <3 and I want to talk about a small moment in Artificial Condition that I’d never noticed before. It’s near the end of the book when Tapan is in ART’s medsystem after nearly dying, and SecUnit says that when Tapan wakes up it’s holding her hand.

When Tapan woke, I was sitting on the MedSystem’s platform holding her hand. (Artificial Condition, p. 155 in my ebook)

I thought it was a really sweet moment, but it also kind of puzzled me because of SecUnit’s aversion to touch. Later when I was reading Exit Strategy, I noticed a similar moment when SecUnit holds hands with Mensah to help disguise them as they’re trying to escape TranRollinHyfa.

[Mensah] took a deep breath and looked up at me. “We can look calm. We’re good at that.” Yeah, we were. I did a quick review to make sure I was running all my not-a-SecUnit code, then I thought of one more thing I could do. As we stepped out of the pod, I took Mensah’s hand. (Exit Strategy, p. 87)

Reading these scenes felt different in a couple ways. In my opinion, SecUnit taking Mensah’s hand in Exit Strategy seemed like more of a big deal because it was a part of SecUnit’s reunion with Mensah, and we see its thoughts and emotions leading up to it. And it tracks that SecUnit might feel ok holding Mensah’s hand in that situation because of their close friendship. But the moment in Artificial Condition is more mysterious. We don’t get any of SecUnit’s internal monologue at the beginning because the scene opens when Tapan wakes up. And even though it’s clear in the book that SecUnit likes Tapan along with Rami and Maro, I wouldn’t say their relationship is anywhere near as close as its bond with Mensah. So why did it hold her hand?

I think it’s a neat moment that’s fun to ponder! And I have some vague ideas I’d like to share about it. (Some of this is based on the books and some is my speculation as an ace/aspec person dealing with touch aversion.) (Also none of these thoughts are mutually exclusive!)

Maybe SecUnit saw holding Tapan’s hand as a form of first aid after her traumatic experience and didn’t want her to panic waking up in a strange ship’s medsystem. This fits with SecUnit bracing itself to hug Mensah in Exit Strategy. (The memes of this moment are perfect lol)

But I was the only one here, so I braced myself and made the ultimate sacrifice. “Uh, you can hug me if you need to.” She started to laugh, then her face did something complicated and she hugged me. I upped the temperature in my chest and told myself it was like first aid. (Exit Strategy, pp. 82-3)

But I feel like SecUnit might not care as much about comforting Tapan in a similar way if it hadn’t already built up some kind of trust with her? Which brings me to Thought 2:

I think SecUnit might have felt safe holding Tapan’s hand because of the moment in Artificial Condition in the second transient hostel when Tapan laid down next to it. (Ofc I think rescuing Tapan from Tlacey’s ship was also a factor, trauma-bonding and all. But to me this moment in the hostel is more important.)

Thirty-two minutes later, I heard movement. I thought Tapan was getting up to go to the restroom facility, but then she settled on the pad behind me, not quite touching my back… I had never had a human touch me, or almost touch me, like this before and it was deeply, deeply weird. (Artificial Condition, pp. 136-7)

This is one of my favorite sequences in Artificial Condition (which is also my favorite book in the series because of ART! And because I find it quiet, reflective, and weirdly cozy even though objectively few cozy things happen now that I think about it). The scene is pretty mundane with a lot of fun bits like SecUnit pretending to need to use the restroom, be on a diet, etc. And we usually don’t get to see SecUnit hanging out with only one person. So it gives room for some small, but important feelings that I don’t think SecUnit has time to explore when it’s busy saving the day. Like how it feels about physical contact with humans.

(idk it reminds me of how like in ghibli films there’s usually at least one scene with the characters eating a meal or something because it sort of grounds everything else. I just like it!)

Tapan being close to SecUnit seems to throw if off-guard, but the context of the scene feels non-threatening and pretty mellow. So I think this gives SecUnit the opportunity to check-in with itself about this new experience. It still feels weird about it, but not in a scary or upsetting way. I think it’s almost this mutual vulnerability (Tapan feeling vulnerable and seeking comfort and SecUnit feeling vulnerable about her closeness and its own boundaries) that creates a bond between them, and that’s why SecUnit reaches out to Tapan to comfort her when she wakes up onboard ART.

That scene has become really special to me. And I would argue that it’s an important moment to SecUnit too because it brings it up again in Exit Strategy, along with a later moment in Rogue Protocol, thinking about times when it’s experienced physical contact with humans in a non-traumatizing way.

Except it wasn’t entirely awful. It was like when Tapan had slept next to me at the hostel, or when Abene had leaned on me after I saved her; strange, but not as horrific as I would have thought. (Exit Strategy, p. 83)

These moments seem to lead up to SecUnit offering to comfort Mensah later on because it’s reached a point where it feels willing to do so for her sake, even if it doesn’t want to seek out that kind of comfort for itself. And it’s really cool to see SecUnit navigate this throughout the books.

SecUnit starts the series with a strong innate sense that it doesn’t want to be touched by humans, but it’s allowed to refine those feelings in light of its new experiences. It’s boundaries are situational and personal, and even well-meaning humans sometimes struggle to understand them at first. Other times, SecUnit finds it difficult to understand it’s own feelings regarding touch and even changes its mind. But, importantly, the narrative always presents this as valid and worthy of respect.

This is a much more nuanced and realistic portrayal of defining boundaries than I’ve seen in a lot of media- one where it’s a constant and sometimes confusing process of self-discovery.

And these might seem like obvious concepts to some people, but they weren’t for me growing up. I really wish I’d read these books when I was younger, and maybe I would’ve given myself more grace to define my comfort level, grow, and change. But I’m glad that I’m in a place now where I can see and appreciate these things in what’s become one of my favorite series.

Anyway, I don’t want to say "thanks for coming to my TedTalk” lol. But very grateful to anyone who reads this and hope it was thought-provoking. Would be interested to hear other people’s thoughts on these scenes!

#murderbot diaries #murderbot meta #murderbot #secunit #artificial condition #rogue protocol #exit strategy #murderbot spoilers #too many feelings

[sirfrogsworth]

It's hard to be nostalgic about Tumblr without remembering my friend Tru.

Truett McGowan.

What a fantastic name.

We met each other because we were both tech geeks following Leo Laporte. He was the very first live streamer. Originally he hosted a TechTV cable show called The Screen Savers. But once G4 took over and focused more on video games, Leo's show was cancelled and he was looking for a new way to broadcast content.

So he built a studio near his home and created his own infrastructure in order to live stream video on the internet. He called his new show "This Week in Tech" or TWiT for short.

Along with his new streaming venture he created a TWiT community using an open source microblogging platform called Laconica. It was a form of Twitter that you could create specifically for a single community. Basically a custom niche Twitter feed. I was trying to be a web designer back then, so I created custom themes for Lacnonica.

This was my own personal theme for a website that I ended up never launching.

Leo called his custom Twitter, "The TWiT Army." And I was his graphic designer and webmaster. I made all of the cute little graphics for the website.

I also did fun holiday themes...

For the Thanksgiving theme, if you hovered over the Turkey it would change to being cooked.

I also took it upon myself to photoshop a little army helmet on the avatar of every single user of the site.

This was the zombie avatar I made for myself during Halloween.

The TWiT Army was also where I started posting my first attempts at Photoshop comedy. Many of them related to The TWiT Army.

And The TWiT Army is where I met Tru. He used a space invader avatar. I made him a couple of different versions.

You may have seen his avatar on the sidebar of my main Tumblr.

We became fast friends. We finished each other's jokes. We talked pretty much all day, every day. He loved Apple back then. I was strictly PC at the time. So we debated about that quite a bit. He would probably be astonished I have a MacBook and that I really love it too.

Our friendship lived in a little text box. We never talked outside of instant messages. But it was one of the most profound friendships of my life. I loved Tru just as much as any friend I've ever known in real life.

Tru started blogging on this brand new site called Tumblr. He reviewed apps for the iPod Touch. Not the iPhone, as that wasn't yet a thing.

I made the banner for his Tumblr.

He kept trying to get me to join Tumblr, but I was busy trying to create my own custom comedy website. But my site kept getting more and more complicated and I could never quite finish it. I was trying to arrange guest authors and create 3 months of content and I was always futzing with the theme and never happy with it.

I was getting frustrated that I could never launch my perfect comedy website and Tru suggested just making a Tumblr and posting funny stuff so I could be creative and have an outlet until my big site was ready to launch.

Little did I know Tumblr would end up being my big comedy website. Eventually I abandoned months of work and just stayed on Tumblr. All of my success here is pretty much because that little space invader pestered me to join when I was being stubborn.

Unfortunately, as some may have figured out already, the story gets sad from there. Tru mentioned briefly that he had a heart defect, but he never said it was serious. He acted like it was no big deal so I never thought too much about it.

We always talked through instant message and email, so we never exchanged phone numbers or addresses or anything like that. Tru was a very private person so he never even published an image of his face online. I only knew him as a space invader.

One day I woke up and sent him a message and got no reply. He usually woke up before me and answered as soon as I said hello. This had been our routine for nearly a year.

An hour went by. Two hours. Three hours.

It was odd for him not to respond for that long. I was really worried but all of my TWiT friends told me I was being paranoid. But there was a huge knot in my stomach telling me otherwise.

But then those hours turned into days. Days into weeks. Weeks into months. My worry grew exponentially as more time passed. I didn't know what to do. I tried finding his family. I even looked into hiring a private investigator. I don't know if I have ever felt a combination of depression & anxiety that intense.

In my heart, I knew what had happened. I knew that heart defect took his life. He was only 26 and it just didn't seem fair. But the not knowing for certain ravaged my mental health. Before all of this I had lost nearly 90 pounds and I gained it all back.

I think maybe a year or so later I found a friend of his who knew him in real life. They were finally able to confirm my suspicions. He passed away from his heart condition. That was my first real experience with grief. But I was so thankful for that bit of closure. I was finally able to let go of my anxiety and mourn him properly.

But Tru gave me such a wonderful gift. He pushed me to just start making things. To stop stalling and just create things to make people smile.

And you all probably know the rest from there.

[cowboyjen68]

hi jen! i've know im a lesbian since I was 12, but because of my problems with socializing i've never actually had ANY romantic interactions(my lesbianism making things even harder, as you can imagine)

i'm almost out of high school and going to college, so i'm feeling very down about missing out on teen romance but dont want the same thing to happen again. do you have any tips on what i can do to avoid this problem in the future? i am genuinely clueless on what to do when looking for a partner, really

even if you dont actually have any advice to give i still really love your blog, it reminds me that lesbians can actually grow old and live happy lives💖💖thank you for hearing me out and i apologize for any grammar mistake!!

This is pretty easy because, while it was pretty outgoing and friendly, it was often not as my full self. I kept my horse girl, lesbian, butch and weird music and hobby side of myself under wraps from most of my friends. I had no word for lesbian or butch but my high school best friend knew I probably liked girls, we just never discussed it and it didn't bother her. It might have been harder on our friendship had I tried to come out in the 80's, not because it bothered her but the insinuations of all the others about our relationship would have been A LOT for a high schooler.

I waited until after college graduation and I used to sometimes look back and wonder how many times I missed out kissing a girl in high school or other women in college. How had twinges of regret for not having sex or even attempting intimacy with women.( I mostly avoided boys too because ew)

As I was sitting in a miserable passionless marriage to my wife of 17years, I pined for that passion and tingle that i had with my first girlfriend from ages 23 to 30. How many times did I miss that feeling with girls in my high school or college or at summer jobs because I was unsure of myself and not confident that any woman would find me attractive. I was even unsure if loving a woman was something I could do. Was it a real thing?

Looking back now I realize I just was not ready and most of my young friends in high school were not ready for me to be out and opening attracted to the same sex. I had fun in high school, made friends and had a small group of girls I was very close to. I enjoyed those friendships perhaps because I did not come out and cause those bonds to be strained.

In college I was concerned how my parents would react and I was in no way independent from their financial and emotional support. My friends were all around me experimenting with their sexuality and I was watching from outside, really wanting what they had but not willing to give up my security and college education to be open about being a lesbian. I knew I could just "do it and hide it" but I was not built for the stealthy life. I know if i was loving loving women it would be hard to be quiet.

Here is the point I am getting at with the sharing of all these experiences. If you were not ready to act on dating and attempting to date it is probably good that you listened to yourself. We are not on a time line and many young people feel pressured to date when their confidence, sexual maturity and social skills are not ready yet which can lead them to be vulnerable to abusive, controlling or unhealthy relationships. It is hard to listen to your own intuition and set and keep boundaries when you are trying to date just to not be the only one not dating.

What you more likely missed out on was not the thrill of dating but the hassle of pretending you want to date when it didn't feel right, at all.

You are heading to college. You are now becoming interested in the excitement of dating on your own and not because others think you need to date. You are craving the touch, the tingly feeling and the companionship of women. These are all good signs you are ready to date.

My advice:

1.Be honest with yourself and then her (your date) every time. Do not go on date number two if it does not feel right. If you are unsure go on another date but continue to listen to yourself.

2.You deserve passion and mutual excitement to be in the company of a woman. If one of you do not feel it, move on.

3.Do not stick to a relationship because it is "ok" or she is "nice" . You have the right to sexual, emotional and intellectual stimulation. Look for it and don't settle.

4.There will be other women so don't cling to the first one or the one willing to stick around just because she is there. If you don't feel all the afore mentioned excitement, be honest with yourself and her and move on.

5. Dating a woman with whom you share many wonderful moments and lots of joy does not mean you will be together forever or have that expectation. Short term love is a thing and neither of you are failures when that fades out.

6. Ask her. If you see a woman that interests you be clear that you would like to take her on a date and you have romantic interests. Don't be vague or try to use hints. This leads to miscommunications and false expectation every time.

7. Finally, use all the dating and flirting and breakups and heartbreaks and joy and fun and memories to form who and what you are looking for as a partner. All that experience is giving you a better idea on what makes you truly happy.

You missed out on nothing. The adventure is just beginning and it can start with a simple "Hi, I think you are cute. Would you be willing to go on a date with me?" She might say "no", but she MIGHT say "yes".

#lesbian #dating #college #fomo

[hauntedcheesecakewizard]

Okay, can we talk about how broken Kris from Deltarune must be?

Imagine waking up one day and you can't control your body. Your moving without thought, saying things you'd never say, struggling with things your an expert at without the ability to cry for help.

And people don't notice.

They actually prefer you this way talking about how mature you've become, how nice you are. You've been so lonely but the moment you aren't yourself you manage to make friends.

You're only able to be liked when you're not you.

Your own mother doesn't notice that something is off.

Why would you want to gain your body back if you're only going to disappoint everyone because of the real you?

Everyone always says "be yourself!" But what if people don't like you when "yourself"?

Imagine Kris trying to be friends with Susie for YEARS and failing, then this unknown entity comes along and does it in less than a day. Why would you even bother with trying to come back when everyone is so much happier with this replacement of you?

Even if you did somehow come back, would they miss your replacement? How can you know they aren't secretly wishing you were like them?

That you were them?

Being constantly compared to this higher entity that knows exactly what to say, when to say it, and what to do to get a desired out come when you're just you.

A boring, lonely, typical teen.

Considering there are seven chapters (I believe) this means that we will control Kris for a week and I doubt anybody would notice that much (maybe they'll notice more if you go genocide/bad ends but I digress) that must be so demoralising knowing your closest family and friends aren't concerned by your sudden personality shift and applaud it.

What will happen at the end when everybody learns their friendships were built by an imposter? Will they still stick around Kris or drift away from them because they're not us?

Kris must have a soul of determination to keep yeeting us out (causing themselves serious harm by the look on their face as they plunge their fucking hand into their chest) because I would've thrown in the towel after day 1.

Okay I'm done 🫠

#deltarune #kris dreemurr #random #undertale #angst #I need more Kris angst fan art please im begging #i would but my drawing skills are as good as Berdlys ice resistance