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#it's okay to do less
thepeacefulgarden · 9 months
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ngl, I'm beginning to take issue with how in conversations about anti-intellectualism almost automatically, the face of girls and women will be slapped on the problem.
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inkskinned · 10 months
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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obsob · 1 year
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making and weaving and loving! like we have done for millennia!!
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waitineedaname · 10 months
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everyone likes to characterize shou as the one climbing through ritsu's window uninvited, but I think it's important to remember that when he showed up at the kageyamas' house, he knocked on their front door like a normal person. ritsu however broke into kamuro's dirty fuckin room, presumably through the window, for no reason other than to intimidate him and be an asshole. and he still had the good etiquette to take his shoes off, while being a dick. I think we need to reevaluate which one is more likely to exhibit unhinged behavior and break into someone else's house between ritsu and shou
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seagull-scribbles · 9 months
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They’re out of time (cancelled)
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dykeinthedark · 4 months
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doing this thing i call "reading every class high school lit book i missed out on" partially because as an english minor i feel like a lot of ppl in my english lectures have already read these books in higschool partially because high school english classes suck balls and i think the way they taught kids to read books was lame and dumb as hell and killed love for reading and i think some of these books they make kids read should never be experienced in a classroom setting
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sketchy-tour · 3 months
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ALRIGHTY! Time to formally reintroduce yall to my silly idiot OC Dandy!
and by that I mean, I redid their ref art, tweaked their bio, and finally made a ref for their stupid pajamas! Wanted to do other fits for them but aa another time. Brain is mashed potatoes.
Anyway, Dandy is my silly WH oc who's main theme is self care/self love messages shown through the imagery of gardening! Meant to be a sort of "garden of the self" sort of deal. They go by ANY PRONOUNS! She/her or He/Him, or They/Them are all correct and okay to use when talking about them! (I just tend to default to they/them) Putting their full bio under the break!!! So you can read it all there!
"Resident gardener of Welcome Home, Dandy Leon is a curious but careful presence among the others in the neighborhood. They enjoy the quiet and spending their time tending to their various flowers. While a little shy around their fellow neighbors, they open up quickly when asked about their garden. Despite their more introverted disposition, they're always determined to make every day just dandy!"
It’s presumed that Dandy makes appearances only in the later episodes of the show’s run. But in old scripts found with them, it's shown that they moved to Home specifically because they were interested in the local plant life there. The episode that featured their move in seemed to focus on them slowly warming up to the others in the neighborhood, as their shy nature made it difficult for them to properly meet everyone. When asked as to where they lived before moving to Home, Dandy mentions living in a farm town far away, simply deeming it "far more south from here!" A lot of their dialogue also mentions their father, though he's never named but instead mentioned passively as Dandy would often use phrases like "Well it's like my pop always said-" when speaking to the other puppets.
During their short time on the show, Dandy's segments seemed focused on care for their garden, the language hinting that the flowers were more a metaphor for taking care of oneself and well being. Other characters can be found pointing out how much better Dandy’s garden looks when they’re feeling happy, but also comment how wilted it becomes when they’re shown to be a bit more downtrodden. They feel strongly about how important it is to be kind to yourself, even if it’s a skill they’re shown to still be working on themselves. Their confidence is something they also struggle with, seemingly a character meant for shyer audience members to attach to and grow alongside with. Dandy is often depicted in illustrations with Frank, getting along quite well in the show, often joining him and Julie on small escapades. Before the show's end however, most of Dandy's screen time is with Wally as he tries to get Dandy out of their shell more to spend time around others.
Interestingly, what pronouns were used for them seemed to change between the show's episodes and illustrated materials. While neighbors would refer to them as 'he' during the show, most art pieces seemed to refer to Dandy as a 'she'. Whether this was simply a miscommunication between teams or a printing error is unknown.
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uncanny-tranny · 2 years
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I think it's completely ethical for a child of influencers to sue their parents for non-consentually making them a child influencer
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sophsicle · 4 months
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OKAY question
i wanna reread choices and edit it but i can never make myself do it cause im like "ugh wow so long i simply cannot"
but also, every time i do reread parts of it i have like *thoughts* like SO many thoughts about it and about what i was thinking at the time and how that has or hasn't changed and what i was trying to do and what i love and what i hate and blah blah blah
SO the question: if i did like a lil read-a-long with soph thing, would anyone be interested? like maybe in the form of small podcast episodes where i discuss the chapters as i edit them and you guys can like tell me the different stuff you want me to talk about etc etc and then i will have the motivation to actually do this and also somewhere to dump all of my *thoughts*
or is that like, a stupid idea that no one asked for? i cannot decide whether this is leaning more on the fun cute side or the annoying keep this to yourself side, Y'KNOW????? so i ask
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mediumgayitalian · 2 days
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prev
———
She brushes another kiss to his hidden face and settles against the car door, holding him. She thinks for a moment and decides on something old, a tune she heard on the radio once upon a time and never heard again; she’s warped it, now, no doubt about it, humming it from memory so long it’s changed to whatever she has made it. But Will recognises it from years of lullabies, picking up on the swooping baritones and mumbling the words into her shoulder.
“You know, that Han Solo shrine up in your room makes a lot more sense, now that I think about it.”
The melody dies in his throat.
“Mama.”
“I’m just saying.” She bites back a smirk, swatting away his smacking hands. “There was a point in time I thought it was admiration, you know, but you have a lot of posters of that open vest —”
“Mama!”
She acquiesces, this time, never having seen his poor face so scarlet, trying and failing to keep her laughter to herself. The tear tracks have long since dried and his breathing is steady, now, gangly limbs tucked into her ribs and hanging off the bend of her thigh. Flopped all over her like he used to to when he was young and she was still touring, when the world was too loud and too bright and too mean and she hid him from the sun. Her hands in his hair are to touch instead of soothe.
“Who’s the boy?”
“No.”
“C’mon, babydoll.” She pokes at his ribs, grinning widely when he rolls his eyes to hide his smile. “Tell me.”
“It’s nobody, Ma, gods.”
“Yeah, right. Not like you were comparing having a crush to killing someone in cold blood twenty minutes ago. Clearly it’s somebody.”
He, very pointedly, doesn’t answer.
Unfortunately, he forgets that he gets his stubborn from her.
“Hm. Can’t be anyone I haven’t heard of in a few weeks, or else it wouldn’t be bothering you. What names have you mentioned?”
He looks at her in horror. “You wouldn’t.”
Absolutely, she would. Her smile widens.
“I’m gonna go out on a limb and guess it ain’t Chiron, ‘cause then I’d have questions —”
“Oh my gods! Stop!”
“— an’ I doubt it’s that security fellow, with the eyes, although if it is no judgement —”
“I’m throwing myself out of this car! Right now! I’m gonna lay on the road ‘til someone hits me!”
“— Lord, you don’t mention many names. You’re a recluse, baby. You gotta make more than two friends.”
She stills. Will, perhaps guessing where she is going, makes a noise of deep, personal agony.
“Oh my stars, is it Cecil?”
“Ew, Ma!”
He strains against her hold but she tightens, hooking her elbow around his shoulders and flexing her other hand, pretending to examine her nails.
“It is, isn’t it? I mean, he is a very handsome young man. And he has a good heart, too, despite the — how to put it — distaste for the law —”
“I just threw up in my mouth! Right now! Stop it!”
“I should probably stop letting him stay in your room when he stays over, huh, that one’s on me —”
He wrenches himself away from her, finally, clambering over the seats and gagging like the mere idea makes him nauseous.
“Ew! Ew! I do not have a thing for Cecil, oh my gods, I might as well marry my cousin! Augh! I’m gonna throw up for real! Why would you even say that, oh my —”
“Alright, alright!” she laughs, kicking his rapidly repeating shoulder. “Holy Jesus, you are dramatic. I should call up camp and tell him you’re out here retchin’ at the mere thought.”
“Good,” Will says darkly, voice muffled from how deeply his head is buried in his hands, “make sure to also tell him he is a weasel.”
“Uh-huh.”
“And that I am going to deface his vintage Hot Wheels collection.”
“Y’all have a strange friendship.”
“He’s not my friend, I am stuck with him via circumstance and because he refuses to leave me alone.”
She holds up her hands in surrender, refraining from pointing out the friendship bracelet he is currently wearing with a CM on it and that has not left his wrist in four years.
“Alright, alright. Not Cecil.”
He scoffs in agreement, ignoring her rolled eyes.
She wracks her brain for other boys he’s brought up in their phone calls, aside from people in passing. Mostly he mentions patients, really, answering her endless inquiries — it will never stop astounding her that he baby can practically sew heads back on bodies; she tells people he’s in med school and preens at their wide, impressed eyes — but there are other people he mentions, in between that and the pranks he’s frequently pulling with his friends.
“There was that boy you were so excited to keep around. Nick?”
“His name is Nico,” he corrects, and then immediately goes scarlet. “I — I mean, I have a friend, named Nico, not that —”
Her grin gets sharp as nails.
“He is — unwell! He’s travelled a lot, he needs monitoring so I am — monitoring him, you know, out of concern for his safety —”
“Nico and Wi-ill, sitting in a tree —”
“Oh my gods are you five —”
“You are steaming! I can actually feel the heat pouring off of you right now! You love him, you want to kiss him, you —”
“I am never telling you anything again in my entire life!” he hollers. “Never! Next time I think I should tell you something I’m just gonna — swallow glass!”
She snickers. “Drama queen.”
He sticks out his tongue as she situates herself back in her own seat, turning the keys in the engine. His puts his dirty converse on the dash despite her grouching, reaching over to fight her for control of the radio, flapping his hand excitedly when she lets him win and something bright and overdone starts playing. His bandage stays where it is, tied loosely around his wrist.
“I’m glad you told me, you know.”
He smiles, small and genuine, leaning into the palm she cups around his cheek. The dimple in the centre of his right cheek is back, the scrunch of his freckled nose. She presses a lingering kiss smack dab in the centre of his forehead and he leans into it, trusting.
“I know.”
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rpg-elf-girl · 1 year
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OKAY BUT-!
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I think this fandom is too normal about Petronille. WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE'S ONLY IN HER LATE TEENS/EARLY 20'S WHAT DO YOU MEAN?????
Like like!!!! We don't have a timeline on when Bonnie and Nille ran away from home, but it HAS to be when Bonnie was really young. Bonnie doesn't seem to remember their parents well at all, and the most we hear about them is that they were "mean". So like!!!! Depending on how old you see Bonnie (10-12ish) and how young you think the two ran away, that could range from 5 to 9 years give or take.
Thats!!!! A range!!! At the oldest Nille (say 24) she was 18 or 19 when the two ran away, which is an adult but still pretty young, but the youngest range????? Hello??? If Nille is 19 now, she could have been as young as 11 when she took Bonnie!!!! What!!!!
I don't think that's the case, but still??? If we take the average of those two, Nille would be 16!!! 16!!!!! And taking care of her sibling basically on her own!!! Nille is a kid who had to grow up too fast and take on the world to make sure Bonnie and her could survive!!! Nille's probably been fighting a good chunk of her life for their happiness and that doesn't even ACCOUNT for the abuse their parents messed her up with. And then after EVERYTHING basically sacrificed herself so Bonnie could have a chance to live from the King's Curse!!!!!
And after all that!!!! Suddenly, she's offered protection from 4 random adults who also adore her sibling and want to take care of the both of them??? What do you do with that??? Do you even BELIEVE that??? Can you even trust that someone else than you could be trusted with your baby sibling? That you can let someone else take that responsibility. The responsibility that you took on with your whole heart and soul to the point you made sure that even if you basically DIED for all that mattered, at least Bonnie would have a chance.
You've been asleep for months and woken up in a new reality where you're not your sibling's whole world anymore. They've changed. You weren't there for it. These people Iove Bonnie so much. But do they know them as much as you do??? They weren't there all this time!!! You should know your sibling better than anyone here!!!
And yet. Yet...
You don't know what to make of this. You're happy Bonnie's safe. You're terrified you don't recognize the new parts of them that have shown up without you being there.
Your sibling lives in a whole new world now. They love you. They would come back to it just being the two of you if you pushed it.
But if you do, you're not sure Bonnie would ever forgive you for it.
(Are you seeing my vision??? Do you understand why I'm not normal about Nille????)
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stuckinapril · 1 month
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The whole “be responsible not for other people’s feelings but to them” distinction is so so true… at some point you need to realize that other people’s insecurities really are their responsibility & dimming or contorting yourself to make them feel better helps neither you nor them. Firstly, bc they need to realize what they’re doing and grow up. And secondly, bc you’re not just compromising on a one-time thing. You’re comprising on who you are as a person. I don’t want to look back when I’m older and stay stuck wishing I held my ground despite people’s projections or asserted my presence more or didn’t apologize so much for who I am. I really just want to own everything (the good and bad) & continue doing what makes me happy
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nachosforfree · 1 year
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Shout out to aro people who DO show little emotion, who do have low empathy, who are monotonous, who do relate to robotic characters on a level other than the fact robot characters often don't feel romantic attraction
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hellaephemeral · 2 years
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i love how the biggest problem of the ua siblings isn’t that they don’t share the bits of vital information they all individually collect over the season with each other (or can’t because they are separated) but that they do and are immediately dismissed by each other because “oh well we don’t have time for tHIS rn” and “whatever this can’t be as important as THIS” and “oh klaus says weird shit all the time so like why even question his story about a glowing orb in the basement??”and “i heard what you said but i am just gonna ignore you“ it’s not even miscommunication at this point. they ARE communicating, they just couldn’t give less of a fuck about what comes out of each others mouths and i love that
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