#like ok if i were going into the hospital but literally he's supposed to look at my blood cell count
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#i am going to a referral to have someone look at my blood work#they sent me a dozen pages of paperwork to fill out and want me to bring my will and power of attorney#neither of which do i actually have written out and i am not going to try to put together in just a few days?#it is a consultation#like ok if i were going into the hospital but literally he's supposed to look at my blood cell count#there's not any point where they need to see my legal paperwork?#like medical history ok i understand and i understand wanting to know my medications#but i'm not disrupting my entire life for a consult that may not even be relevant?#like my referring doctor is just guessing at things now she has no idea what's going on#gonna call them and be like sorry i'm not trying to find a lawyer and draw up paperwork in a week while also working#i don't think it's even legal to ask to see someone's will? like what the fuck?#my parent's were being treated for stuff and we had to dig the wills out of my dad's files#nether one had an official power of attorney filed i don't think or medical power of attorney#like how is that your business when i haven't even met the doctor yet and may not even want to deal with your practice?#this thing where medical practitioners just assume you're going to go along with whatever they say is really irksome#like the ct scan place they're like you might be going straight to the hospital if your doctor says so#when at no time was i ever warned or given intimations that that was a possibility?#like what if i had plans? or a pet or a kid? like you have to let people know about things ahead of time?#especially if it's not an emergency?
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a bad batch
barça femeni x teen!reader
request: here
A/N: do you guys ever wonder what showers in the diff teams lockerooms look like? is it just a big room with showers and they’re all naked together or is there cubicals? if anyone knows please enlighten me
TW: Vomit, illness, swearing
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
It wasn’t your fault really, it was whoever decided that the KFC given to you was actually safe to eat. Don’t they have quality managers for that? Despite it literally having feathers on it still, it was pretty meh. Not even enjoyable chicken.
That’s how you find yourself hunched over a toilet bowl, throwing up all contents of your stomach and more. You’re sweating but cold, you definitely know you have a fever or sorts but you’re uncertain how bad.
Worse thing is, training was supposed to start in 5 minutes. No way you were getting there now, not like this.
You shoot a quick message off to Jona explaining you don’t feel well and it’s probably something you ate. He replies quickly saying the usual of taking off however long is needed to get back to full recovery.
What’s the one thing you don’t consider in all this? You’re very overprotective teammates.
You end up puking more, and passing out on the bathroom floor due to exhaustion, the cool tiles feeling magical against the heat your body radiates.
- - - - -
You’re awoken by harsh knocks on your door. Your head hurts, your throat is scratchy, you’re dizzy and delusional, you feel like shit.
You stumble toward the door, opening it to see Frido and Keira.
“Jesus.” The Englishwoman says before pressing a firm hand and against your ablaze skin.
“Jona told us you said it was a light sickness? This is bad.” She says, rushing inside with the blonde Swede behind her. You were teammates with Frido on a national level as well so she took on more of a role while you settled in Barcelona.
“Come on, you shouldn’t be standing älskling (darling). Sit down, come.” She rests her hand on your back guiding you to the couch to sit down.
“Have you eaten?” She wipes away the sweaty hair away from your forehead.
“No.” You whisper softly.
“Ok, we’ll get you to eat and then into a bath ok? If we don’t get this fever down we might have to take you to a hospital.” The words compute in your mind, you don’t want a hospital. You just have to follow what the older 2 say and you’ll be fine. That’s what you tell yourself at least.
- - - - -
After eating a couple spoons of chicken broth Keira gave you, you’re taken to the bathroom and stripped into your sports bra and bike pants.
“Get in the water älskling, you’ll feel better I promise.” Frido kisses the side of your head, helping you in the bath.
It’s cold, and you do not like it.
“Frido, cold.” You whimper, trying to get out.
“I know but you have to stay. This is needed, trust me?” Her heart breaks at the sight of you in so much discomfort. But she knows it’s for the better.
You cry, along with everything else you’re feeling now, you’re cold and not allowed to move. Keira starts to stroke through your hair whispering soft words of affirmation.
“Shh bub, stop crying. You’re ok, it’s all gonna be ok.” She looks over to her teammate who is measuring your fever.
“It’s still a bit high, 37.8. Just a little longer älskling, then you can go to sleep does that sound ok to you?” You can’t even recognise her statement, only focusing on the cold your body feels.
After a couple more minutes, the girls decide you’ve had enough time to cool down so they change you into fresh pajamas, putting you to sleep in your own room before coming up with ways to hopefully get you to feel better.
- - - - -
When you wake up again a couple hours later, you feel even worse. Every body part aches and you feel the need to throw up again. So, you muster up all the energy you have and make a bee-line to the toilet.
Luckily making it in time, you spill more contents of your stomach. Someone has tied your hair back but you can’t will yourself to move.
“Hey, relax.” The accented voice says. You do as told and fall into Caroline. When did she get here? But you do as told, not wanting to feel this way any longer.
“Feel like shit.” You mumble, exhausted.
“I know, Marta and Ingrid are also here now. We will check your temperature soon ok? Right now you just need to not stress and stay here alright?” She runs her fingers up and down the sides of your torso until Ingrid comes in.
“I’ve got the thermometer. Could you open your mouth for me?” You open it without question, and she visibly cringes at the reading when she takes a look at it.
“This is not good, this isn’t normal. Look.” She shows it to her national teammate. Who also cringes.
“Tell the others to pack her stuff, get Frido here. Tell her the temperature and we need to go to the hospital.” This is when you start to worry, even in your delirious state.
There’s commotion outside the walls of your bathroom but you can’t will yourself to care, slumped against Caro hoping you’ll feel better soon.
Frido rushes inside, picking you up off the floor. She rushes to the car and gets in the backseat. In the front is Keira and Ingrid, in another car is presumably the other couple.
- - - - -
Arriving at the emergency department, you’re immediately taken to a private room where they hook you up to machines and an IV. You try to fight them, feeling too overwhelmed by the situation but Frido takes the chance to hold your hand in hopes of calming you down.
“Deep breaths älskling, it’s not too long before they’re gone.” Her words are a comfort to your ears, and she’s right because the doctors leave soon after that.
You look down at the little thermometer on your finger, showing the temperature of your skin. 41.5°.
You cringe like all the other girls who had seen it previously. Despite your hatred for hospitals, you’re happy because it means that the pain should go away sooner.
Frido has been on the phone for a bit, and she walks over to you.
“Magda wants to speak with you.” She smiles lightly, and you take the phone holding it against your ear.
“Hi Magda.” You say, voice an octave higher than usual.
“Hey little one, heard you weren’t feeling too great. Are the girls treating you right?” You hum.
“Yeah, they’re good.” She seems content with the answer.
“Ok good, we need you healthy for the next camp. Can’t have the mini star gone.” You laugh slightly at the given nickname.
“Alright pass me back to Frido, stay well and don’t do anything stupid. Please.” She begs over-dramatically.
“Come on, I’m not that bad!” You laugh, even if it made your stomach slightly hurt.
“Sure, sure. Talk to you later little one.”
“Bye Mags.” You pass it back to the older Swede and the door to your room opens revealing Mapi and Alexia.
Alexia walks over to you, concern visible between her brows. Mapi heads straight to Ingrid. (Not a surprise).
“You don’t look well at all. I’m not sure how you managed to text Jona.” You shrug, she takes a long breath.
“We’ll talk about saying how sick you actually are later, for now you should get some rest. We’ll be here when you wake up.” You do as told, quickly falling asleep without fight.
- - - - -
Over the coming days, the girls watch over you like hawks until they’re sure you’re better and you won’t snap in half at a slight gust of wind. It got annoying, but you couldn’t really say no when they were just trying to make it easier for you.
Whenever you threw up, cried in pain or overall didn’t want to do anything. One of the girls would be there to take any anguish you had away. No matter what, Barca isn’t just a team. But also a family.
—————————————————————————
sleekswosobsession: number 1 writer for cringe ending lines
anyways i need help from you anons, i have an english short story (800 word) narrative coming up but i need ideas.. i’m a writer not creative producer. but i do know that YOU have some ideas so please give it to me. these are the topics:
1. betrayal of trust
2. consequence of bad timing
3. Individual against society
(go wild but not too wild cuz i have to give it to my teacher)
#woso#woso community#woso x reader#woso fanfics#barcelona femeni#barca femeni#barcelona femeni x reader#barca femeni x reader
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Fluent Freshman - Part 28
PREVIOUS
FF does not like being on pain medication.
Everything feels floaty and it is so hard to focus on anything around him.
He’s almost glad that his Gran has given him something to focus on that something being helping her sell her lie to the Foxes that she only knows Polish. Coach Wymack must know but the man is a steel trap and FF finds himself envying his Gran that HER secret keeper is Coach Wymack.
“Smithy! My sweet beautiful idiot!” Nicky cries when Gran gives Wymack the OK for them to come back in. FF finds himself on the receiving end of 2 forehead kisses and a kiss to each of his cheeks from Nicky. “Next time you see a crazy mafia hitman looking to kidnap me you just grab me and RUN.” He orders pointedly, “No more cool guy shit where you take ‘em out in the weird sex alley.” He runs his fingers through FF’s hair and…
Yeah it’s okay that Nicky is the one that knows.
Nicky is so nice.
“What about Aaron?” FF asks.
“If Romero could grab Aaron when he is in whacky inflatable tube mode then I don’t think he’d be taken out by you and Andrew.” Nicky says with a watery smile.
“Hey.” Aaron’s voice is offended.
“Learn to dance at a club already. We’ve been going for years.” Nicky shoots back but never takes his eyes off of FF’s face.
“I dance just fine. I’m better than Kevin.” Aaron argues.
“Hey.” Kevin’s voice is offended.
“You are better than Kevin, but that’s not a real standard of good.” Nicky dismisses, “Regardless, next time grab me and I’ll grab Aaron and the three of us can hide literally anywhere other than the weird sex alley. We could go to the back room with Roland or, if it means you not ending up in the hospital with a stab wound, I would even tolerate hiding down in the straight swingers club in the basement.” Nicky says.
He sees Andrew and Captain Neil tense off to the side.
Oh, that’s right.
Oh fun another lie for him to focus on instead of feeling floaty. Gran always talked about the virtue of telling the truth but the only thing set free would be Nicky in a club that he’s not supposed to know about.
“I wouldn’t ask that of you Nicky.” FF says instead.
Nicky laughs and kisses his cheek one more time. “You’re my favorite family member now. Sorry Aaron, you’ve made me endure the horrors of a heterosexual relationship for too long.” Nicky says stroking FF’s face as he looks up to where FF assumes Aaron is.
“Hey.” Aaron says in the exact same way he said earlier.
“Andrew-“ Nicky starts but is cut off.
“I don’t care.”
“That’s the spirit.” Nicky says, “Neil-“
“Nicky, I also don’t care.”
“At least you have one another to support each other.”
“Wait, what about me?” Kevin asks.
“You won’t even LEARN the family language Kevin, you were NEVER in the running for my favorite.” Nicky dismisses and doesn’t bother to turn back to the “So Smithy is my favorite family member now with Aras coming in second.”
Two things strike FF in the wake of family conversation.
First, when in the world did Kevin get here? Why is he here? Is he going to ask the doctors to run tests on FF to figure out stealth mode?
Second, Nicky just used his Gran’s nickname. The nickname that causes FF no small amount of embarrassment. It was a youthful indiscretion! He had thought he understood Lithuanian quite well! He had wanted to impress his Great Gran and his Gran with his knowledge.
“You’re looking pale Smith, do you need more pain medication?” Captain Neil asks.
“No, I’m fine.” He is pretty sure that pain meds can’t numb the psychological pain of his friends hearing about his youthful mistakes and he doesn’t care how bad his stomach is going to hurt he wants to only take the absolute minimum amount of pain meds required to get through this so he can stop floating.
Having friends nearby makes it so much easier.
Conversations go on with him and around him. He’s tired still from everything and when a nurse comes in to try and give him more pain medication he declines. All present in the room except Gran try to convince him to take it but he declines all but the most minor amount to take the edge off.
He finally realizes that Kevin had not been with them and asks why the hell he’s here. He gets an answer that makes him reconsider being on any pain medication at all because it doesn’t really make any sense. Why in the world is Kevin telling him not to trust the nutritionist?
Neil lets him know that the FBI are going to be coming around at some point to talk to him. He says that Agent Browning is a dick but generally fine and that there will be a local agent Iruma Matsumoto stopping by before him, probably today. He looks right at Andrew and says “Yeah, I’ll talk with them about how Romero stabbed me.” Andrew lets out an amused puff of laughter that makes FF feel like he might be doing alright at this friendship thing.
He apologizes to Andrew that he can’t make the pie today and gets a flick to his ear.
He finds out that he slept through all of Saturday and that it is Sunday morning. Finds out that his Gran and Wymack had stayed over at the Columbia house last night and that Wymack has him excused from his classes this week. He also finds out that Nicky has given his grandma a key to the house in Columbia so she could stay there while she’s visiting him.
He apologizes to Nicky for messing up the clothes he’d let him borrow and earns another flick to the ear from Nicky.
Wymack hands him a new phone that Nicky has apparently set up for him. His lip quirks up slightly when he sees that Nicky registered it as ’Smithy’s phone’. Neil shows him some stuff since he has the same phone model but Andrew rolls his eyes.
“You’ve barely figured out how to set anything on your phone Junkie. You still haven’t even set a screen lock.” He says as he pulls Neil back from FF’s space.
“I’ve figured out how to change the notification ping.” Neil argues but lets himself be pulled away and if Andrew keeps his arm around Neil afterwards? No one comments on that.
He translates things for his Gran when it seems important for her to be able to respond to and helps Nicky with some pronunciations.
He falls asleep a couple times and wakes up to his friends and teammates in all sorts of different configurations. Nicky gets him some good sugar-free Jell-O from the nurses while Aaron smacks Kevin upside the head when Kevin complains that it’s not good for him and not part of the diet he’s making to get FF back on the Court ASAP. “He’s gotta be on a clear liquid diet for 24 hours after his surgery.” Aaron hisses.
“Why does it have to be clear? I can put it in a blender but it won’t be clear.” Kevin grumbles.
“He’s not going to be on puree’d food for at least two weeks idiot.” Aaron smacks his head again.
“Stop that.”
He hears from Wymack the other Freshman Dealer won’t be returning and that Sheena is now their only Dealer and she does not do defense well. Kevin’s disapproval for the Jell-O cups only grows stronger in light of this news. His grumbling only stops when Gran looks at him and says “Maybe someone should help you pull that stick out of your ass young man.” In her nicest most grandmotherly voice.
When Kevin turns to FF for a translation Nicky beats him to it, “She said a handsome young man like you shouldn’t ruin your face with worries.” He says without a hint that he’s lying.
Kevin preens at the grandmotherly approval of his looks and FF gets to know that he, Nicky and his grandma all have lying in common.
Eventually it’s lunch time and the natural hunger of college athlete boys trumps anything else. Kevin won’t eat anything at the cafeteria since he doesn’t trust the nutritionist so they agree to head out of the hospital to grab food. He’s more tired than hungry so he tells his Gran to go with them. She pats his face and promises she’ll be back with some clear soup for him per the Doctor’s order and despite Kevin’s grumbling that he could make a clear protein shake.
His Gran kisses his forehead and tells him that she’ll be back soon and that he should rest as much as he can.
***
FF can’t sleep.
He tried.
He really did.
But without the noise of everyone else his mind keeps going back to the last time he was in a hospital. He closes his eyes and he can see Gran’s pale face when she tells him that his dad didn’t make it and the tears when she tells him neither-
He can’t sleep.
So he gets up against medical advice and decides to go on a walk. He’s not been connected to any of the monitoring equipment since he had first woken up, just the IV keeping him hydrated. FF decides he wants to get his dad’s leather back because it would make him feel better. The leather jacket has weight that would keep his feet strictly on the ground and it’s something his Gran had given to him when he went off to college so that he could keep his dad close. He could call a nurse but it feels like he shouldn’t distract them with something as stupid as getting him his dad’s jacket so he doesn’t have a panic attack.
So he lets himself slip into the background and heads towards the nurse station. He thinks that might be where they’re holding his belongings. It’s a good first stop if nothing else.
He can’t help but notice a strange number of men in suits but figures that maybe they’re just there to talk to people who seem to have gotten caught up in some sort of mass casualty incident.
He makes it to the nurse station and when a whole 5 minutes goes by without a single nurse clocking that he exists he considers speaking up until he sees a nurse bagging up some clothes, slapping on a label, and heading away.
It’s nice when things work out for him.
Another suit wearing man comes up and a different nurse sees him there immediately and comes up, “What can I help you with?” She asks.
“I’m looking for someone with the last name Smith, he has a stab wound?” The man asks.
“You’re going to have to be more specific.” The nurse responds with exasperation but FF is already almost out of earshot when he hears it because he’s following the nurse with the bag.
He follows her down the hallway and she thankfully takes an elevator instead of going down the stairs because FF doesn’t know how he would have gotten his IV stand down with him.
FF walks in with her and he watches her slump as the doors slide close. Relaxing like most people do when they think they’re alone. Her shoulders go straight back when the elevator opens again and he follows after her.
He follows her to a door that she unlocks and proceeds to enter and FF sees a room full of the same bags with belongs all tagged with a last name and a room number. “Christ, why are there so many fucking Smiths in here right now?” She grumbles but takes him straight to the S section and he sees his own ‘Smith’ and room number.
He grabs it and heads out the door before the nurse and heads into the elevator.
His phone pings with a text message. He opens it and sees a text from an unknown number.
“Come to the Cafeteria. - IM”
FF stares at his phone for a few minutes before the initials click.
Iruma Matsumoto, the local FBI agent who was coming to talk to him today according to Captain Neil. It’s weird to be texted like this but this is the first time he’s ever had to talk to the FBI. Maybe it’s normal? He doesn’t really want to bother Captain Neil about what getting interrogated by the FBI is like since Captain Neil is out at lunch.
He decides to go to the Cafeteria.
FF follows the directory in the elevator and then the arrows that point him towards the cafeteria. He takes a moment to pull his dad’s jacket out and it does help him feel better. He realizes the McDonald’s toy is still in his pocket and thinks that he really should probably turn that over to Agent Matsumoto.
When he gets to the cafeteria he sees even more of those guys in suits and then he sees a well dressed Japanese man sitting by himself at a table. FF has a moment where he thinks ‘Wow that FBI agent sure does look like a member of the Yakuza.’ Before he squashes it because ‘OMG that’s such a fucking racist thing to think. Thoughts from the abyss are the worst and Agent Matsumoto is probably a perfectly nice guy.’
He takes a seat in front of the man who is surrounded by two other of the men in black he’s seen. Oh that guy was probably looking for him to bring him here so they could have the talk.
None of the men seem to notice him and FF realizes that he’s still in stealth mode. He sets the bag with the rest of his clothes to the side and clears his throat.
Three sets of eyes are on him immediately and FF breathes through the anxiety as the two men at either side of Agent Matsumoto seem to reach for something at their holsters.
“Captain Neil said you wanted to talk to me.” He says.
Captain Matsumoto raises a hand and the two men on either side of him return to an at ease position.
***
Ichirou Moriyama could admit to himself that he had been startled when a young man seemingly appeared out of nowhere in front of him without any warning. He sees a bulge in the man’s pocket that says that he’s armed and he could have done anything before bringing attention to himself. He had men throughout the hospital and no one has spotted Wesninski or any of his cohorts but they had their eyes peeled for the uninvolved civilian who had taken out Jackson on his own and had assisted Wesninski’s guard dog in taking out Romero.
Interesting.
Ichirou clasps his hands together in over the cafeteria table.
“Yes, let’s talk.” He agrees.
MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU
NEXT
@i-have-three-feelings @blep-23 @dreamerking27 @andreilsmyreligion @belodensetdust @rainbowpineapplebottle @yarn-ace @iwouldlikesometea @lily-s-world @obscureshipsandchips @booklover242 @whataboutmyfries @sahturnos @pluto-pepsi @dreamerthinker @passinhosdetartaruga @leftunknownheart @aro-manita-muscaria @hologramsaredead @Chaoticgremlinswishtheycouldbeme @tntwme @tayspots @nick-scar @crazy-fangirl2524 @blue-jos10 @stabbyfoxandrew @splishsplashyouropinionistrash @sammichly @the-broken-pen @bitchesdoweknowu @very-small-flower @ghostlyboiii @its-a-paxycab @bisexual-genderfluid-fan @cheesecookie
@theoneandonlylostsock @foxsoulcourt @blueleys @adverbialstarlight @elia-nna @can-i-just-stay-in-the-corner @nikodiangel @foxandcrow-inatrenchcoat @hallucinatedjosten @satanic-foxhole-court @vexingcosmos @chalilodimun @insectsgetcooked @angry-kid-with-no-money @queer-crows @lillyndra @themundanemudperson @readertodeath @apileofpillows @mortalsbowbeforeme @hellomynameismoo @next-level-mess @youreonlylow @interstellarfig @notprocrastinatingatalltoday @percyjacksonfan3 @queenofcrazy27 @bsmr261 @ghostlyscares @spencellio @adinthedarkroom @harpymoth @sufferingjustalilbit @anxietymoss @oddgreyhound @ohno-myhyperfixation-itsbroken @ken22789 @atiredvampire @isoldescorner @not--a--pipedream @azure-wing @bushbees @roonilwazlib-main @crumplelush @foldedaces-paperbirds @thesenseinnonsense @let-tyrants-fear @ketchupandfries @legowerewolf @deadlydodos @but-we-respect-his-craft @cariniqe @zanypersonapricotbiscuit @lesbian-blackbeard @lesbiansupernatural @silvermasquerade @thepeachfuzz @minniemariex @kazoo-the-demjin @gaypomegranate @ji-nk-ies @neilimfinejosten @omgrubelangel @itsyouitsmeorpheuseurydice @percabethotplove @cozyrosykay @foxyatlas @theoneandonlylostsock @cindersapsecrets
The requests to be added to the tag list keep being spread out across a few different areas. If I missed you please just ask again in the replies I promise I just missed you.
As stated before if you’re up here and I spelled it right but you didn’t get a notification there might be something switched around in your settings that won’t let me tag you properly?
If you didn’t get notified on the last part it’s probably because I used tumblr mobile to post and our most beloved garbage fire site just didn’t like that.
#Fluent Freshman AU#Guess who accidentally took FF's phone?#It's Neil#He realizes it halfway through the grocery store run#Sorry FF your grandma is now the Monster Grandma#She's got knitting projects planned for each of them#She's already asked about allergies#She jokingly tells Nicky she'll knit Kevin a muzzle because he's commented on the amount of butter she uses four times#He always shuts up when he eats it at least#Neil is blissfully unaware that he has FF's phone and FF has his#Some poor Moriyama grunts are wandering through the hospital having to check every single Smith room for the one they're looking for#Ichirou was planning some mild intimidation shit on Neil#But was hampered because JFC why so many Smiths#Does Ichirou know Smith's first name?#Perhaps#Does he use it?#Probably not#AFTG#AFTG AU#AFTG OC#Andreil#FF - Pt. 28
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Hello! I'm sure you get this a lot but I really love and enjoy your writing and I'd love to see how you'd write a reaction with 0t6 betraying the reader. Like a member leaving the reader over a friend or another member during an important event for the reader. Can the reader be a bit stubborn and not easy to win over but a fluff ending overall? I hope this makes sense I'm willing to explain more if needed.☺️ Hope you're having a great day.
All members << * ~ * >>
Summary:The aftermath of Xdinary Heroes leaving you during an important event. (idol/non-idol au)
WC:~2.3k
Warning: angst I guess
I'm aware the endings aren't that fluffy, but they do show that their relation is gonna be ok, so I hope that's enough.
photo not mine credits to owner.
Gunil
You searched around for Gunil in the crowd, but you couldn’t find him. Pulling out your phone you went to text him only to discover that he already sent you a text. “Sorry Jooyeon called from the hospital he’s fine but I had to go.” “I’m sure you did great though!” His first text felt like a stab to the gut and the second was a twist of the knife. Gunil left you. When he knew how important today was for you, he still left you.
“Hey darling, I'm back.” Gunil approached you trying to kiss your cheek, but you moved away. “What’s wrong?” he asked. You scoffed and rolled your eyes, walking away from him. “Ok look I’m sorry I left I know-”
“You knew how important today was for me and you still left,” you cut him off harshly.
“It’s not like I wanted to. Believe me, but Jooyeon called me in a panic about how he had to go to the hospital and asked me to meet him there so-”
“You couldn’t have told someone else to go meet him? Jungsu, Seungmin, Hyeongjun? Why did it have to be you?” Gunil sighs at your sharp words. He tried to approach you, again you kept your distance.
“Ok, you’re right. I should have asked if someone else could go meet him, but he sounded like he was pretty hurt and I was worried. What would you do if your friend called you all panicked about needing to go to the hospital?” Gunil flipped his situation on you. You sighed, you do understand why he left, but it still hurt.
“I understand Gunil, but it still hurts that you weren’t there for me,” you told him. Gunil tries to approach you again and this time you let him.
“I am truly deeply sorry y/n. Trust me I felt horrible for leaving you. I’ll do whatever you want to make it up to you ok?” he said.
“Ok…I’m still mad though.” Gunil smiled and kissed your cheek, feeling relieved that you didn’t shy away this time.
Jungsu
This wasn’t good. You were furious. Jungsu had left you alone at a family event that you specifically told him how much you needed him to be there. To make matters worse he left you to go help her. His friend that he always told you to not worry about, yet you just couldn’t help it. Today certainly didn’t help with that.
“I’m sorry y/n, but she called me crying and all upset. What was I supposed to do?” Jungsu says.
“I was crying and upset after you left! Plus you know how I feel about her and I told you how much I needed you!” you yelled back.
“Y/n I am really sorry. You really don’t have to worry about her.”
“Don’t I? You literally picked her over me. How am I supposed to not worry about that?” Tears filled your eyes.
“I swear you're the one I love y/n,” he pleaded with you.
“I’m not sure about that. I don’t know if I can do this anymore.” The tears slid from your eyes.
“Don’t say that.” Tears welled up in Jungsu’s eyes.
“I need someone who can be there for me when I need them. Someone who would pick me. I’m not sure if that’s you.” You looked down at your feet.
“It’s me. It’s me alright. I’ll never contact her again if that’s what you need me to do. I promise you’re the only one I want.”
“That would make me look like a villain,” you sighed.
“No it wouldn’t. I shouldn’t have gone to her today. It was a mistake and I regret it. I didn’t think it would upset you this much, but I should’ve known better.”
“You won’t pick her over me ever again?” You had to be sure before you thought about forgiving him.
“Swear on my life,” he stated.
“Ok, I think I still need some time though,” you say.
“That’s fine, but can I hug you at least?” he asks. You thought for a moment before nodding. He holds you like you're made of glass.
Gaon/Jiseok
“You promised you would come.” You sounded so dejected as the words fell from your mouth. Jiseok promised that he would come to support you at an important event, but he never showed. It made you feel like you weren’t important to him. Not important enough at least.
“I know. I’m sorry, but the guys needed me,” he tried to explain.
“And what they wouldn’t have understood that I needed you?” you scoffed.
“Y/n please I know I made you upset, but-”
“But what? Now I know that you’ll pick your friends over me? You showed me where I stand with you?” Your voice grew louder.
“Y/n I love you so much.” You scoff again.
“You think saying you love me is gonna magically make me forgive you? Not this time Kwak Jiseok. I’m really pissed at you.” You stood up to walk away, but Jiseok desperately grabbed your arm.
“Y/n please don’t leave. I know I messed up bad, but please don’t leave me.” You could hear the desperation in his voice.
“I need some space, Jiseok. I don’t want to be around you right now.” You tried to pull your arm free, but Jiseok held it tighter. Not too tight though. He didn’t want to hurt you anymore than he already has.
“I’ll give you all the space you want, but can you please promise that you won’t break up with me because of this? I really can’t lose you y/n. I love you with my whole heart and I’m not saying that to try and gain your sympathy. I just want you to know that I do.” You took a breath, taking the time to process his words.
“I’m not gonna break up with you. I love you too, but I really need space right now, so can you please?” You looked at where his hand was wrapped around your arm. Jiseok slowly let go, like he was still scared of losing you, but he had to trust you. It was his only option. “I’ll let you know when I’m ready to talk.” Jiseok nodded. All he could do now was wait.
O.de/Seungmin
“I really needed you today, you know?” Seungmin left you right in the middle of an event. One that you really needed him at for moral support. You needed someone to lean on. He knew that, yet he still left you alone.
“I know. Jungsu really needed me too he-”
“More than me? He didn’t have anyone else that could help him?” you cut Seungmin off.
“It was something only I could help him with,” Seungmin explained.
“I really needed you too though. I guess it really is bros before hoes huh?” You were very clearly upset.
“Y/n please don’t be like that. I understand that you're angry with me. You have the right to be, but you know I wouldn’t have left if I didn’t need to.” Yes, you did know that. Logically you did know that Seungmin wouldn’t have left if he didn’t need to. That since he left, Jungsu evidently did need him more than you did, but still sucks that you weren’t the one he chose. It still hurts.
“I know, I know, but it still really hurts me that you left,” you tell him.
“I’m sorry. I know that doesn’t fix what happened, but for the record it wasn’t easy for me to leave you. I felt guilty about it- I still do. I wanna make it up to you whatever way I can.”
“I don’t know how you can,” you expressed.
“Whatever you think about I’ll do it ok? Whether you figure it out now for five years from now I’ll do it,” he promises. You nodded.
“Is Jungsu alright?” You could finally ask now that you were feeling more calmed down.
“He will be. He feels bad for making me leave you too. He wants to apologize, but he figured you would be upset and need some time,” he tells you.
“Why is Jungsu so sweet? Can’t even stay mad at him,” you grumbled.
“I’m sorry again,” Seungmon conveys one last time.
“I get it.” Your head fell to rest on his shoulder.
Junhan/Hyeongjun
You knew Hyeongjun wasn’t the type of person to just not show up. Especially when you talked about how important today was, so your initial reaction to him not showing up was that something must have happened to him. When you found out that something did happen only it wasn’t to him, it was a friend of his. You felt relieved that Hyeongjun was ok, but then anger quickly set in over that fact he picked them over you. You couldn’t keep the thoughts away that this person meant more to him than you did. That he would pick this person over you again.
“Am I not important to you Hyeongjun?” You couldn’t help but ask.
“What? Y/n you are so important to me. What are you talking about?” Hyeongjun responded.
“Not important enough for you to pick me that’s why,” you mumbled.
“Y/n I’m deeply sorry about that, but I thought that you were strong enough to handle it on your own and-”
“Your friend wasn’t. Yeah I get it, but if I wasn’t strong enough. What if I felt like I was having an anxiety attack the entire time? I kept looking for you because if I saw you I knew that I would be ok, but you never showed,” you tell him. Hyeongjun feels bad, horrible, but he can’t take back what he did. If he had a time machine he doesn’t know what he would do. He was in a really tight spot today and he’s fully aware that whatever he chose would be wrong for someone. However now maybe he thinks he should’ve wronged his friend instead of you.
“I wronged you and I’m sorry, but whatever I did I would have wronged someone. Can you try to understand that at least? Not saying that it should’ve been you. It was a lose-lose situation for me and I had to try and pick which one would be a bigger loss.”
“So your friend is a bigger loss than losing me?” Your anger flared.
“No! No! Y/n that’s not what I meant. I thought you would be more understanding about the situation or I don’t know. I did a really bad job at explaining. I would much rather lose my friend than you. You’re the most important person to me please trust me on that. I-I-I really messed things up for us didn’t I?” Hyeongjun began to anxiously ramble.
“I am really mad at you, but I’ll be able to forgive you with time. It's just what you did today. Made me feel like I wasn’t important to you.”
“You are so important to me, I promise. I’ll never pick someone else over you again alright? I was stupid today,” he says
“You were in a hard situation. I understand, but you also understand that what you did hurt me right?”
“I do and I’m deeply, truly, sorry.” He looked you in the eyes and you can tell he meant it.
Jooyeon
“Jooyeon, how could you leave me alone today! I told you how serious this event was!” Jooyeon flinched at your words. He knew that you would be upset with him for leaving, but he didn’t anticipate you being this upset.
“I’m sorry y/n, but she really needed me. You know I wouldn’t have left if she didn’t.”
“Did she need you more than me? I really needed you!” You didn’t even want to hear about her. You know that she was just Jooyeon’s friend. You didn’t have any worries about her being more than that, but the fact that you now had confirmation that he would pick her over you hurt like a slap to the face, multiple slaps.
“Y/n please don’t do this to me. It was a hard, impossible even, decision to make,” he tried to plead.
“Yet, you still picked her in the end and if you picked her once you’ll probably pick her again. She comes before me,” you stated.
“No she doesn-” he began.
“She did this time, so why not other times?” you cut him off.
“She didn’t have anybody else,” he tired to explain.
“And I did?” you said sarcastically. Feeling like your anger was at a max. If you were a cartoon you’d have smoke coming out of your ears. Jooyeon sighs.
“No, you didn’t. Look, all I can do is apologize. In that moment I felt like-”
“She needed you more than I did. Yeah I get that,” you rolled your eyes.
“I may have made a mistake-”
“May?” You arched your brow.
“I did make a mistake,” he restates his words. “Friends are supposed to be there for one another, but I get that I should've explained to her that you really needed me and I shouldn’t have gone. Looking back at the situation I see that now. I can only hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me,” he says.
“I don’t want to feel like I’m in a competition with her,” you express.
“You’re not. I promise you’re not. I’ll set more clear boundaries,” Jooyeon declares.
“You can’t leave me again. I really did need you today,” you say.
“I won’t, I won’t. I promise. I’m sorry for today.” He hugs you, rubbing your back to try and soothe your tension.
Taglist: @purplelady85 @odesonnets @gingerjunhan @chewednails @ezlynkisses @mon2sunjinsuver
#xdinary heroes#xdh#xdh imagines#xdh x reader#xdinary heroes imagines#xdinary heroes x reader#xh gunil#xh jooyeon#xh jungsu#xh gaon#xh jiseok#xh o.de#xh ode#xh seungmin#xh junhan#xh hyeongjun#gunil x reader#jungsu x reader#gaon x reader#jiseok x reader#o.de x reader#seungmin x reader#oh seungmin x reader#junhan x reader#hyeongjun x reader#han hyeongjun x reader#jooyeon x reader#goo gunil#koo gunil#gunil
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Hello! Can I just say, how much I love you writing and such, it’s just perfect like I mean it
But could I possibly have what different BSD characters (dazai etc etc) would do to like help their s/o and such who has gotten out of surgery and in pain? Like how they would help etc.
Thank you so much! Take your time with this and remember to stay hydrated and all that! :)
a/n: tysm anon ily!! i got ur other ask too and, good luck with ur surgery!! i promise everything will be ok <33 picked some of the characters that i thought would be the best for this :0 also, thank u all for 1.6k??!?! was just celebrating 1.5 a week ago?!? plz ily all sm
warnings: surgery, descriptions of pain, but tons of fluff
(Dazai, Yosano, Ranpo) When Their S/O Gets Out of Surgery
Dazai
so first of all, dazai stayed with you for the entirety of the hospital visit
from the consultation, to the surgery itself, to the recovery afterwards
he wasn't allowed in the room during the operation but stayed in the waiting room (probably blowing up your phone with memes for you to see when you woke up)
speaking of when you wake up, expect to see this mfs face the second you open your eyes
hovering over you like (•◡•)
goes all "good morning belladonna~" while you just stare at him like O_O because you're still loopy from the anesthesia
^he thinks it's the most adorable thing and records a video to send to the agency group chat
once the effects of the anesthesia have worn off, dazai helps you to the car and brings you home to rest
is literally so doting?? and surprisingly responsible for once
makes sure you take any medications for recovery and picks up food from ur favorite place
his heart breaks to hear you complain about the pain so he'll lay with you and hold you until it feels better <3
meanwhile you're wondering why ur phone is blowing up with messages from the agency group chat?? (dw, they're just commenting on how adorably lost you looked)
then there's the one message from kunikida that's like "they look horrified. but i would be too if dazai was the first thing i saw when i woke up" based asf
Yosano
she's literally a doctor, therefore the best one for this situation
tries to convince you to let HER do the operation?? you gotta refuse because getting cut up with her mf chainsaw sounds even worse than the surgery
despite the fact that she won't be carrying out the operation, she MAKES SURE it all goes smoothly
drives you to the hospital, checks you in, and leads you to an operation room??
you don't have to lift a finger
the other doctors are just like "....." but let her do her thing since they'd heard about her work from the agency
yosano demands to be allowed to stay in the room during the surgery and you best believe she is not denied
keeps a careful eye on every movement the surgeon makes (plz they were mad stressed)
waits by ur bedside until you wake up & holds your hand even tho you aren't conscious
once home, she is very strict with making sure you recover to 100%
deadass sets timers on ur phone to remind you to take your medication
prepares you foods that will be easy on your stomach, and only eats the same things as you so you won't feel left out
shares the latest workplace gossip to distract from the pain as well >:)
Ranpo
bro is all over the place
atsushi probably gets dragged along at one point?? since neither you nor ranpo know the directions to the hospital
once you're in the operation, he does leave the building BUT only so he can go buy a bunch of snacks for y'all to share once you wake up
literally walks in with a shopping bag overflowing
ur not supposed to be eating that stuff after but...no one's exactly looking sooooo >:)
atsushi comes back to pick y'all up and drop you off at home ofc give this man a break
let me just say!! ranpo is the BEST at distracting you from the pain
he does everything from shoving snacks in your face, to putting on five different movies, to going on little story times about past cases he solved and how great he is
bouncing from topic to topic gets BOTH of y'all tired and then you end up falling asleep snuggling or something
but we all know you guys aren't making it to work on time the next morning (if you even show up)
kunikida spam calls at like eight AM and ranpo just answers like "SHUT THEBFUCK UP" before hanging up so you can keep sleeping <33
taglist: @deadmitochondria @miycutie @scul-pted @exorcisedstraydog @chuuyasboots @shy-socially-awkward-intovert @stygianoir @sonder-paradise @nervousyetconfidentway @beautiful-is-boring @alexaizawa @irethepotato @serenareiss
#bsd dazai#bsd x reader#bsd x y/n#bsd x you#dazai x you#dazai x reader#dazai hcs#bungo stray dogs x reader#bungou stray dogs#dazai imagines#ranpo x y/n#bsd ranpo#ranpo hcs#ranpo imagines#ranpo x reader#yosano headcanons#yosano x reader#yosano akiko
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Wicked Game (Mafia Boss!Calum x Florist!Y/N Smut/Angst)
Summary: Florist (Y/N) has no business with a man like Calum.
(Smut / Unprotected Sex / Penetrative Sex / Spanking / Use of Sex Toys / Dom-Sub Dynamic / Semi-Public Sex / Mention of Threesome / Oral; Male Receiving)
(T.W: Violence / Mention of Drugs / Injuries / Kidnapping / Cheating / Hospital Stay / Guns / Mention of Surgery)
This is an NSFW fic. If you feel uncomfortable reading content like this one, please, scroll through the chapters to find something else you might like.
I have been writing this one since September. Please, show it some love.
(Words: 26k) (Request)
My Masterlist / My Ko-Fi
I never planned for my life to take this turn. All of the people who have ever met me would tell you I am nothing but a goody-two-shoes, the girl next door.
And within a night, I found myself dating the King of California. Well, not exactly the literal King of California. Maybe the King of Underworld California. It doesn't really make a difference what metaphor I use to describe him. The essence is Calum is dangerous, and I have no business being with him.
But there I am, picked up from my job at the flower shop by 3 of Calum's men, in the back of a car that reminds me of the ones we see in movies driving a fictional US President.
If I thought the car is extremely secure, the house is an absolute fort, guarded on every angle by both tech and manpower.
The bodyguard guides me to where Calum is sitting, drinking a small americano, as he does every evening. I leave the bouquet of tulips before him I bought for today, getting his attention off his journal.
"There she is. A bit late today, weren't you?" He asks, shutting his journal and placing it on the end table.
"We were ambushed on the way home." I shrug, watching him as he snaps up from his armchair.
"By who? Travis!" He shouts the guard in, gritting his teeth. I laugh at his response, making him narrow his eyes at me.
"Why must you be such a brat?" He asks me, turning to look at me with a stern look.
"Because it's fun. If you could see you now, you would understand." I reply, taking a seat on his armchair. I drape my legs over the armrest, as Travis enters the room.
"Boss, is everything OK?" He asks; Calum has everyone standing on one foot, ready to kill or die for him.
"You can go, Travis..." Calum says in all seriousness, eyes still fixed on me.
"You sure, boss?" Travis asks. I stare back at Calum, still keeping my cocky smirk.
"Leave." He grunts, walking up to me. He stands just before me, looking down on me with his jaw locked tightly.
"You shouldn't be that abrupt with your people." I tease him, earning a huff.
"You are the one to talk about shoulds and shouldn'ts."
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"It means that you keep on defying me. You keep on toying with me, teasing me. You keep on messing with me. And you should not be talking about what I should be doing and whatnot." He grips my chin, making me look at him.
"Oh, I am not supposed to defy you? Oh no, I must have thought the opposite." I tease. Calum just groans at me, leaning down to pick me up over his shoulder.
"Cal, no..." I whimper, but his hand lands on my ass.
"No what?" He asks me, carrying me out of the room, not caring that his people are watching us.
"Leave me on my feet. I can walk." I protest but his hand meets my ass again.
"There you go again. Trying to boss me around. You are putting yourself in a very tough spot." He warns me.
"Maybe I want to be in a tough spot." I sass and he chuckles, but a dark, twisted chuckle, one that promises me along, eventful night.
"Oh, princess... You don't want that." He fakes a coo, heading straight to our bedroom.
I am thrown onto the bed, my body bouncing on the mattress before I lay flat on my back.
"Don't make a single move." Calum orders, holding a finger up warningly.
"What happens if I do?" I ask, almost purring.
"You don't want to find out. You don't want me taking all my anger out on you..." He warns, heading towards the dresser. He fumbles with the drawers a bit, picking a few things up before he moves to our bed. He throws the stuff beside me, kneeling on the mattress and hovering over me.
"I need you out of that outfit." He stares, moving his fingers to undo my jeans, rolling them down my legs. He takes a moment to inspect my underwear, humming pleased at my choice for the day.
"Not bad. Does your boss know that underneath your casual little outfit, you wear lingerie that's worth a month's paycheck?" He asks me, running his fingers under the elastic of my panties.
"Only you know that information." I reply and he chuckles. He grips my chin, bringing my face closer to his.
"It better stay that way." He says, pulling me in for a kiss. My breath is caught in the back of my throat as his tongue pries my lips apart, his hand pinning my wrist above my head.
"Not fair." I protest breathlessly once he parts from my lips, reaching for something besides us.
"And I am just getting started..." He smirks, holding the pair of leather bounds up in the air, showing me what awaits me in a few seconds.
"We need to get that polo shirt off... I don't think I hate any other cloth on you as much as I hate this." He groans, picking the hem of my blouse.
"You know, I could shred it to pieces..." He groans, throwing it aside. Calum is not so fond of me working, especially in a flower shop and this is not the first time he has voiced it.
"I have another one. And my boss will just give me another and keep money from my paycheck." I reply and he hums.
"I think I should have a word with your boss."
"No intervening, remember?" I remind him, looking at him in seriousness.
"Oh, kitten... You are so cute trying to be all serious... Lovely..." He coos at me, reaching behind my back to unhook my bra. Without a single warning, he flips me onto my belly, grabbing my wrist and fixing them against my lower back.
"There ... So pretty." He secures the leather bounds around my wrists, prohibiting me from being able to touch him.
"And now, let's see what else I brought for you..." He says in a sadistic tone, cupping the left side of my face in his hand. He holds up a pair of nipple clamps, jiggling them effusively before me.
"I think you know where those go, don't you, angel?" He asks me, his tone patronizing.
"I do." I reply, knowing that the question - though rhetorical-, needs an answer.
"Good girl..." He flips me again on my back, cupping my breast before his fingers pinch my nipple to roughen it.
"And here go the goosebumps..." He comments, pleased by how my skin is covered with them.
"Wait till you see what's next... It's my favorite thing to put in you... Well, second favorite to my cock..." He states, holding a princess butt plug before me.
"Of course, I wouldn't put that on your pretty little butt all by itself..." He nods towards the bottle of lube resting on the mattress.
"I...I haven't prepped for anal..." I gulp thickly.
"Oh, I know, sweetheart...I am not going to fuck your ass... Not today. I just like the way the gem sparkles every time I spank your ass."
"I am going to get spanked? But why?" I ask, almost whining.
"You are asking? Really?" He asks me, cocking an eyebrow.
"You are a pain in my ass, little brat...I might as well be a pain in yours..." He squirts a generous amount of lube onto the buttplug.
"Now, flat over my knee..." He pats his lap, inviting me to drape myself over it. I crawl closer to him, laying across his thighs and waiting for my punishment.
"It's not fair." I grumble and he chuckles.
"It's not fair when you talk back to me. Or when you scare me. Or when you don't listen to me." He counters, gripping onto my ass, before he squeezes on it roughly, spreading my ass cheeks to squirt more lube.
"Like a good girl, you are going to take it, aren't you?" He asks, toying the toy around my entrance. I nod my head and squeeze my eyes shut as he pushes the plug in. I whimper as I stretch around the toy, despite the lube making it relatively easy to slide in.
"Sweetheart, I hate to see you like that..." Of course, he is mocking me as he presses on the toy to ensure it is well-fitted.
"And now the fun can begin." He hums, stroking his hand softly down my ass, raising goosebumps on my skin. Of course, it is fun for him, but if I am honest, I really like it when he is spanking me. There is something liberating in him treating me like that, something I cannot explain. The first strike never hurts, he knows that, so he is teasing me to pry the element of surprise with that first hit. He smoothly fondles my ass, in an almost sweet way that makes me lower my defenses.
And then his hand meets my bum, producing a loud slapping sound. My first instinct is to gasp, but I manage to swallow it, not giving him what he wants. And that seems to make him more desperate to get a reaction, bolder and more eager to pry what he craves from me.
"You are trying to prove you are a big, brave girl?" He asks me, landing his hand repeatedly on the same spot.
"Well, it's not going to be too good for your ass... It's best if you surrender, princess..." He warns me, squeezing my ass after slapping it.
Despite it, I remain with my lips pressed together, enjoying his desperation.
"Shit, princess... Don't make me bring a paddle over here..." I know this is his last resort, but my ass is already sore and I do not want to add further strain to it.
With the next slap, I let go of holding back and release a whimper, squirming in position over his lap.
"There we go... It's not that hard to break you after all..." He cocks, landing his hand again on the same spot, which is now pulsing and becoming hotter.
The last spank finds me in tears, sniffling as he rubs his hand over my red cheeks.
"Look at what you've done to my hand..." He growls, showing me his red palm.
"I am sorry..." I sniffle, biting my pouty bottom lip.
"You should be... If you weren't so insubordinate, I wouldn't have to spank you..." He sounds so twisted, only a narcissist would accept an apology for a sore palm after spanking someone raw.
"Disgusting." He rubs my sex, gathering my wetness with his fingers.
"Only the most desperate whore would get so wet from being spanked... Disgusting." He traces a lone finger around my clit. I am not sure if not replying will work in my favor, but I am willing to find out since I am so shaken that I can't look for a response. Not that I am trying too hard.
"I am tired. Time for you to put in some effort." He says coldly, moving me aside as if I am made of silicon flesh and I am nothing to him. He lays on his back, only undoing his pants and lowering his briefs, freeing his cock before bringing his hands behind his head and averting his gaze from me. With cheeks still stained from my tears, and my hands now sore by the bounds around my wrists, I can only crawl on my knees to get to him. Almost falling to the front, I straddle my leg over his waist.
"No. Turn around. I don't want to see your face while you take my cock." He barks the command. My heart aches by the comment; it is honestly worse than any other punishment this far. He always says he loves nothing more than to watch my face as I cum around him. And now he is so upset that he doesn't even want to see my face. My bottom lip quivers as he still doesn't bring his eyes to my figure.
"Calum, please." I sniffle, but I only receive dismissal from my lover.
"Daddy, please. I don't like this anymore." He perks up a little, just enough to let me know I can stop it with a word.
"Enough. No. Untie me." I say, my cheeks fired up. Calum sits up and rushingly comes to aid me out of my bondage, quickly undoing the buckles of my bounds.
"Shit, are you ok?" He asks me, shifting back to the worried look he had a little while ago in the lounging room.
"Yep." I smirk, before laying on my back and pulling him by the neck on top of me. The smirk does not fade even when Calum gasps and looks at me sternly.
"You little minx..." He groans as I wrap my fingers around his cock and stroke him. He does not say much else, not until he is inside me with a strong buck of his hips on mine.
"How much longer do you think you will be taking advantage of the sweetspot I have for you?" He asks me, slowly thrusting his full length inside me.
"For as long as I can, daddy..." I say after a much-held-back moan. Calum groans again, an angry yet playful sound coming from his throat before he leans closer to me and captures my lips in a kiss.
His hips move rhythmically to push his cock inside me; sex with Calum at this point means he knows my body like the back of his hand, he knows what I need without even having to hear me say it.
My hand moves to his cheek, my nails gripping onto his cheek as he deepens his thrust, hitting that spot inside me that I like so much when it is given attention. There is a bitter yet sweet taste in his kiss, a mixture of tobacco and strong coffee that is otherwise cloying and repulsive, but on Calum's kiss is homely and aphrodisiac. He is the opposite of what is usually my type, when I met him I was sure I would not fall for him. But fate laughed at my face and in seconds, I was swept off my feet.
"You are even tighter with that plug inside you." Calum only parts from my lips to comment. I can feel my sex pulse around him as he fucks me, his cock and the toy making me feel full to the brim. It is not the first time, and certainly won't be the last. It is exciting to not know what he is going to add next time to our sex life, it keeps me on my toes.
"You still smell like flowers." He moves from my lips, lowering his nose to the curve my neck meeting my shoulder makes.
"Might be because I work at a flower shop." I tease him, bending my leg to wrap around his waist.
"Don't fucking remind me." He scoffs, grazing his teeth over the tender flesh of my neck.
"You fuck me harder when I do." I say cockily.
"Careful what you wish for..." He warns me. I arch my back and move my head to free more space for him, allow him to explore my neck, again, anew.
But Calum seems fixated on something else, something I do not realize until I feel him pull on the chain that connects the two nipple clamps. Up to this point, it was a numb feeling, something lost in the background, not hurting, but present enough to exist as a secondary feeling. And now it stings; my nipples are pulled and the sweet ache spreads from them throughout my body, the course of the electricity that roots from it raising goosebumps on its passage.
And then his hips slam on mine and glue there, solidifying with my body for a second to oblige me to feel his full glory. I grunt, then sigh, my eyes rolling back as a response to all the stimuli.
"I told you to be careful what you wish for." He lets go of the chain, snaking an arm down my body and prying my thighs open to the max.
"Cal... Cal..." I whimper, feeling the bed rattle underneath us.
"You can't keep your mouth shut, can you sweetheart?" He asks me, his grip on my hips tightening. It hurts where he touches me for a moment, his thumb surely making a bruise on my skin. And the pain subsides and just adds fuel to overstimulation. I can't put my finger exactly where it feels best, I can't decide which of the things he does to my body makes me feel the most divine.
"Calum, please. I need to cum." My body craves to ease an itch deep inside me, it craves to gain the release it deserves. It's too soon, I know it is too soon and that we have barely started, but the pain from spanking and the presence of the toy still inside me make me unable to avoid the impending high.
"So desperate, I love it." He groans, angling up his thrusts before he pulls me in for a kiss. He is rougher than he was in the first kiss, now biting and pulling on my bottom lip as he watches how my face twists the closer I get to my orgasm. All I can do is whimper and moan, bucking my hips up as much as I can, to get more of him, to feed the last bit of my orgasm.
"Fuck... Fuck. I am cumming." I cry out, my mouth falling agape and my head tilting back. My eyes shut and in my high, I can only hear how rushed and deep he is breathing. It is enough for my head to build the image of him, with his face tensed and his eyes dark with lust, sweating as he pounds inside me relentlessly.
"Not inside me." I manage to murmur, causing Calum to grip my face and force me to look at him.
"Don't want my seed? Don't want me to breed you, put a child in your womb?" He asks, hissing his words at me.
"Not inside me." I repeat, still not having caught my breath.
"Fuck it, then." He swiftly pulls out of me, nudging my hip to flip me on my chest. His hand lands on my ass once more, right on the red spot he made just before. I flinch and raise my bum in the air, turning my head to the side to look at Calum jacking off. He strokes his cock fast, groaning as his hand wraps around his throbbing member.
"Shit, princess. Look what you are doing to me." He groans. His body is jolting, his chest rising and falling more and more with each stroke he gives himself.
"Fuck, (Y/N), baby." He moans, shooting his cum on my ass. Breathlessly, he falls onto the bed, sprawling himself out on the mattress before inviting me to rest on his chest.
"Are you alright?" He asks me and I hum.
"I am. You?" I ask back, placing my head over his heart.
"I am fine. We need to get those toys off of you. And wash you up, and put some lotion on your butt. And you need to eat something." He lists and I sigh.
"Can you relax for a little bit? You'll take care of me in a while." I say lazily, craving a moment of solitude with him.
"Did I hurt you much?" He asks, taking my hand in his and locking our fingers together.
"No, I am ok. I like it when you are a little rough on me." I reply, pressing my lips on his chest. He is not a man of many words, especially not too talkative after sex, so our conversation end here for now, and we just sink into the beautiful silence.
I take a whiff of his scent, the rich smell of smoke mixing with his cologne makes me salivate, almost tasting him on my tongue. He smells like my Calum, a side of him I am the only privileged person to enjoy. He is soft with me; I know the latest experience does not really show it off, but he is soft with me, loving. I press my ear more on his chest, listening to his heartbeat and shutting my eyes, enjoying the beautiful, calming sound.
"This might hurt you a bit..." Calum warns me. Kneeling on the mattress, I am before his gaze, with him examining me for any wounds or bruises caused by him.
"Not my first time in a rodeo." I chuckle and Calum looks at me in all seriousness.
"Seriously. These ones bite back." He states and I roll my eyes at him.
"Seriously, we have used these before. Just pull them." I groan and Calum huffs.
"One of these days you are going to regret the sass." He pulls the nipple clamp, a little too abruptly, almost as if he does it for revenge, to pay me back for my cockiness.
I shudder and let out a scream, feeling the pinch move from my nipple and tear through my body. My back arches and I can feel my eyes water,
"Told you you were going to regret it, princess." He says sadistically, waiting for me to calm down before he pulls off the other clamp, in just the same way as the first one.
"Ssh, princess... Thought this wasn't your first rodeo." He scoffs, passing his thumb over my nipple, before leaning in to kiss it softly.
"Look at it, all rough and raw..." He fake-pouts, swirling his tongue around it.
"Thought we were going in for a bath." I protest and he hums.
"We are... You are lucky I already had it drawn for us." He pecks on my temple, before picking me up over his shoulder. I am actually thankful this time around; I am too tired to walk, even the short distance to the master bathroom.
"I dropped a bath bomb in... A purple one." He comments, setting me inside the warm, steaming water. I take a deep breath of the vapors, instantly recognizing the dominant smell of lavender, and the faint notes of aloe filling the bathroom. Calum joins in on the other side of the extra-large bathtub, sinking up to his diaphragm in the hot water.
"Might fall asleep..." I mumble, relaxing my head back. Calum hums, but it comes out as a throaty groan, which anyone who does not know him would take as angry. But Calum is on the very verge of relaxation.
"You need to eat first. Then you can sleep for as long as you want." He says sternly, placing his hands on the edges of the bathtub. His fingers tap softly on the white porcelain, and I can see his chest move as he breathes calmly but deeply.
"I am not really that hungry." I comment, sliding my body down the tub and submerging in the water. I come out instantly, already feeling relieved of the tension in my head and shoulders. I am growing tired by the minute and my body is becoming tenser when it should be relaxed.
"I didn't ask if you are hungry. I merely announced you are eating." He comes back once my head is out of the water.
"I have kinda forgotten how bossy you are."
"You have forgotten? Wow, I am way more lenient than I should be with you, then."
"We know that you can't be strict with me." I roll my eyes and he hums.
"Hm, and you keep abusing that." He replies as I stretch my leg out towards him.
"How is your ass, princess?" He asks me, grazing his fingers over my calf.
"It stings. I cannot sit on it, I am hovering here..." I reply and Calum smirks.
"That should teach you not to scare me again."
"Did I learn all the other times?" I ask, cocking an eyebrow at him.
"You know, for a cute, little flower girl, you are way too sassy."
"I mean, roses have thorns, they are still cute and little."
"Didn't you say you were sleepy?" He asks, cocking an eyebrow at me.
"Very." I hum, resting my head on my forearms on the brim of the bathtub.
--
It has been a relatively quiet day at the flower shop, expected for the Wednesday morning. We usually don't get a lot of traffic in the mornings, nor on weekdays, so I focus on spritzing the potted plants with extra care. It is my happy place here, I know that most people don't find this job exciting or interesting, but I do. It fills me, it helps me keep my mind space.
I hear the chiming of the little bell hanging on the door, signaling me the presence of a client. I leave the spritzer by the last plant I water, wiping my hands on my apron before I head to the front.
My eyes land on the client and a smile erupts on my face, my gaze grazing my boyfriend's frame.
"Good morning. How can I help you today?" I ask, biting the inside of my cheek.
"Good morning. I need flowers. Lots of them." He replies, winking at me.
"For a special someone, I assume." I comment and he hums.
"For a special pain in my ass." He replies as we walk towards the fridge we keep the cut flowers to keep them fresh and crisp.
"What flowers are we thinking of?" I ask with a cocked eyebrow.
"Um, roses, maybe. All the roses you have." Calum stretches the words, making me cock my eyebrow even higher.
"What color are we talking about?"
"All the colors you have. All the roses you have. Your sunflowers too, she likes sunflowers." I roll my eyes at him but his smirk grows even bigger.
"You must love that pain in the ass too much."
"Fortunately for her, I do. I am making her a steak dinner tonight, with a very expensive, very mature red wine. And I am filling the house with flowers for her, she really likes them, so I like everything that makes her happy."
"She will be home on time."
"And she better wears something nice." He comments, leaning closer to me. I can't help but smile; he is too sweet for my own good.
"Did I forget an anniversary again?" I ask and he shakes his head at me.
"No, you didn't. Don't worry." He assures me.
"Did you do something I should worry about?" I ask with my eyebrows furrowed together.
"You have to stop being so vague." He pecks on my forehead and I groan.
"Come on, Calum. Just tell me the reason behind all this royal treatment."
"I just think it has been an awfully long time since we had a date night." He explains and I coo.
"Just that?"
"Mhm... Now, the flowers." He points at the glass door, taking a step away from me.
"All the roses, in every color I have them, and all the sunflowers... Wonder where you'll keep it..." I mumble and he chuckles.
"Do you have any orchids too?" He asks and I throw my head back in surrender.
"It'll take me forever to wrap them."
"Good thing then that I have nothing better to do all day but watch you." He winks at me before I open the glass door to take the vases with the flowers out.
I expected the house already filled with flowers, buds, and petals scattered all around, but the house seems tidy and clean, as it was when I left it this morning.
"Mr. Hood said you should head in to get ready. Dinner will be ready in ninety minutes." Travis says, stopping me from walking further than the entrance hall.
"Where is Calum?" I ask the man before me. He could be considered Calum's right hand, the head bitch of the minions Calum presides over. Travis does not reply to my inquiry, only stares at me and shows me the way to the bedroom. I sigh, knowing it is futile to insist; he won't tell me because Calum told him not to.
"Fine! Fine!" I curse under my breath, holding my hands up in surrender. I make a beeline to the bedroom, and Travis follows right behind me, to ensure I won't disobey his advice. As if I would sprint around the house in search of Calum. Naive me would have done it at the start of the relationship. But now I know that if Calum doesn't want to be found, no one will ever find him.
Contrasting the state of the hallway, the room is decorated with flowers, mostly red, pink, and white roses. Petals form a little circle on top of our bed, framing a big gift box that rests in the middle of it. I sigh; spoiled once more, from head to toe. Without even having to open the box, I know it contains an outfit for the night. At this point, I know Calum has a better taste in fashion than I do. I undo the ribbon and lift the lid of the box, revealing a beautiful, emerald green, silk dress, much fitting his Slytherin aesthetic.
I take the dress out of the box, laying it atop the duvet. Pursing my lips, I observe the garment, trying to come up with a complementary look for it. Off to the shower fast, then I can worry about looking good for his eyes only.
"...I don't fucking care. Are you all so incompetent that you can't even give me a night off? Are you all such pussies that you can't follow clear instructions?"
"Boss..."
"Don't fucking use any excuses. Since you are all idiots, I'll tell you what to do once more. Break his fucking kneecaps. Both of them. And tell him next time he fucks me over, he will sleep with the fish."
"Calum..." I peek through the door. I am not sure what the issue is, and I am not sure who he is talking about, but waiting outside the door is not an option for me anymore. I've heard too much, way too much for me to still be comfortable with who I am dining with. I want him to change back to the loving, calm boyfriend he has been all day, not this ruthless, lawless man that stands amid a flower-covered room. Calum perks up. From the snarling, spine-chilling look he has been giving his minions, he changes to a softer, but still too tense expression.
"Go. Don't bother me again tonight." He barks at his men, who one by one make their way outside the room. None of them looks incompetent, none of them would strike anyone as a softie, it's not the word that would come to mind upon seeing them, in fact, quite the opposite. Yet, they almost look like scolded puppies walking out of the room, passing by me.
"Let me take a look at you, baby." He sighs; he is trying his best to calm down. Sometimes it is scary how he can turn this side off so quickly. I walk into the room, standing awkwardly before his eyes, and looking at the floor in uneasiness. I notice 2 sunflower inflorescences by my foot, resting on the floor among a myriad of petals and buds. My eyes decide to focus on them, at least until I am contented enough to look my person in the eye.
"You look stunning once more tonight, my love." He says sweetly, bringing his hand to touch my cheek softly.
"Thank you." I say in almost a whisper, still staring at the petals of the sunflower. Calum sighs in what I recognize is regret, and my eyes flicker for a second to his face.
"I am sorry they ruined the night." He tilts his head to meet my gaze. I stay silent, lacing my fingers together.
"Fuck... How much of it did you hear?" He asks me, running a hand down his face.
"Enough to remember who you are when you are not my sweet, caring boyfriend." I reply, finally lifting my head to look at him fully.
"I am still your sweet, caring boyfriend." He takes my hands in his, bringing them to his lips. He leaves soft pecks on my knuckles, peeking at me through his lashes.
"Who breaks peoples' kneecaps in his spare time." I mumble under my breath, earning a chuckle from Calum.
"Did you see me do it?" He asks me and I huff, closing my eyes to bring my nerves down.
"Can we not talk about this tonight?" I ask and Calum nods his head eagerly.
"Gladly. Dinner is set outside. Shall we, pretty?" He asks me, holding his arm out to link mine with his. I loop my arm through his, deciding to leave the overheard conversation in this room, and step outside for a romantic star-lit dinner with the person I love.
Vases next to vases filled with flowers are on the floor of the balcony, and in the center of the roomy deck standing a carefully set table. Calum pulls the chair out for me, inviting me to take a comfortable seat.
"You did all that?" I ask, despite knowing he had help, too much help.
"Most of it. I bought the flowers from a very beautiful lady." He winks at me, taking his seat across from mine.
"Should I be jealous?" I ask with a playful squint in my eyes.
"No one compares to you, baby." He replies, reaching to raise the bell of my plate. The food is still steaming, the heat being trapped inside by the inox utensil.
"This looks delicious." I take in the details of the plate. A beautifully filleted steak, medium cooked with a sprinkle of kosher salt and a side of green salad. Definitely Calum's creation, from head to toe simple and clear.
"And the wine..." He stands up to pour me some of the rich red wine. I can smell the aroma even without picking up the glass.
"Are you trying to court me, Mr. Hood?" I ask and he smirks at me.
"Isn't that already obvious, Ms. (Y/L/N)? I added a slice of parmesan cheese on your plate, I know you like it with your leafy greens." He retreats to his seat; I have only now calmed down enough to be able to observe him tonight. He is wearing that white shirt I got him on our last anniversary, with the snake embroidery on the collar, and his usual pair of black slacks, which he probably owns a dozen pairs of.
"You know, you look mighty fine tonight." I comment, picking up my glass and reaching toward him. He mimics my move and clings his glass to mine.
"I had to match how gorgeous you are, didn't I?" He asks me and I roll my eyes at him playfully.
"What should we toast to?" I ask him and he takes a moment to think about it.
"What about how gorgeous my love looks in that dress under the starlight?" He asks me and I can feel a flush creep up my neck and onto my cheeks.
"I can't say it is a bad reason to drink at." I cling my glass with his again, before pulling it back and taking a sip. I moan at the first swig, the smokiness of the aging mixing with the sweetness of the fruit-like base. My tongue tingles for more as I swallow; I am spoiled rotten in that way. Before Calum, I would be excited if my wine came in a glass bottle. Now the taste of cheap red leaves me indifferent.
"Good?" He asks me and I hum.
"Marvellous." I reply, cutting a piece of my steak even smaller. I take a bite and scoff, it tastes that good.
"Jesus, if you continue cooking like that, I'll turn as round as a meatball." I comment and he shrugs.
"I'll still think you are the hottest woman."
"You are obsessed with me, admit it." I tease him and he nods.
"Obsessed is an understatement." He replies, cutting into his steak.
Leaning on the rail of the balcony, I take a sip of wine as I stare at the stars. It is a clear night in Los Angeles, not really usual for the hectic city. But I fully appreciate being able to look at the stars without the pollution in the way. Calum's lips find my sweetspot behind my ear and my eyes flutter, my head finding its way onto his shoulder.
"Hello there..." He murmurs. Since we left the table, not many minutes ago, we have been in silence, just stargazing.
"Hi." I say with a smile.
"Have I ever told you how sexy you are in this light?" He asks me, pecking my temple as his hands move down to find my hips.
"You find me sexy in all lighting." I sass and he laughs softly.
"Maybe you are sexy regardless of the light."
"Solid theory." I turn around to face him, now his hands moving to my ass. Even the slightest touch makes me feel ready to burst.
"Are the watchdogs watching us now, or did you send them to nibble a bone?" I ask him and he chuckles at me. He knows I am not so fond of having people always watching our way, hidingly present in our private moments.
"I would assume you are fine with them by now." He comments, gently touching my chin.
"Why do we even need them here? The house is a fort. And why do I need them following me around all day? I am just a florist. What? Do you have beef with the tulip mafia?" I ask jokingly. Calum's gaze turns a little mellow. No, no, a little somber.
"You need them 'cause I am afraid." He reminds me.
"Of what?" I ask him again, still frustrated over the fact I work minimum wage but walk around with bodyguards.
"Of who I will have to turn to if anything happens to you." He touches his forehead to mine, his breath becoming slow. I touch his cheek, not knowing what I can say to make him feel better, to dissolve his worry. With my hand over my heart, if anything ever happens to him, I will murder the ones who hurt him with my own bare hands. I guess we are rubbing off on each other; Calum has turned softer since I met him, and I have taken a dark and twisted hint from him.
I pull him in for a kiss, my lips inviting his for a dance. We haven't kissed at all today, and I can honestly say I have missed the taste of his lips. Calum sighs in relief as he deepens the kiss, my hand now moving to the back of his head to toy with the stands of messy curls.
He squeezes my ass tightly, pressing his body on mine. I feel him, all of him. His muscles, his warmth, his heart beating in his chest. I feel him. And the erection growing in his pants does not surprise me. All it takes is a moment for us to turn into fucking animals.
"We should head in." He suggests, his hand grazing up my body, hovering for a second before toying with the left strap of my dress. I turn my head only for a second, to look at the railing as I leave my glass on top. It'll have to do, I can't think of where else to put it.
"Are they watching us?" I ask him again.
"No." He replies simply.
"We can stay here then." I move his hand so it pushes down the strap of my dress, revealing my breast to him. His eyes dart there, his tongue peeking from his lips before his hand cups the breast.
"I love wine-drunk you." He mumbles, leaning down to capture my nipple in his mouth. I shudder, every time his lips wrap around my sensitive bud I feel the same wave of electricity course through my body. A moan leaves my lips, catching Calum's attention.
"Hey, we have just started... Keep the lewd sounds for later." He chuckles, in a fake-pity tone.
"Later?" I ask, trying to figure out what the night holds for me.
"Later, princess. When I fuck this tight little pussy of yours. When my cock stretches your perfect little hole... Mhm, that's when you'll have to get all those little moans out." He whispers, his face inches from mine. I stare at him with lips agape, almost melting at his gaze.
"Calum..." I whimper. Calum presses his forehead against mine, his fingers pinching my nipple roughly.
"You have the most perfect tits I have ever seen, babygirl... Shit, you should walk around topless all day long." He groans, pulling at the peak roughly.
"Calum, please... I am so wet." I can barely bring the words out of my mouth, already under his spell.
"My perfect pet... My needy, little pet." His lips slide down my neck, feeling the curve of it with his mouth. My eyes flutter and I can feel a tingling sensation spread all over my sex as his mouth meets my sweet spots. I am going to explode, and he is not even inside me yet.
"Let's see how wet you are." He muses, sliding his hand down my body and under the hem of my dress. He gasps in surprise, seeing that I am bare underneath my dress.
"No underwear? Naughty." He smirks at me, bringing his fingers to my sex and running them over my slit.
"I figured they'd be off sooner or later. Why bother putting on any?" I ask and he shakes his head at me.
"My fingers are coated with your wetness. Shit, look at this, look how easily I can slip my fingers inside you." He whispers, sliding 2 digits deep inside me. My hands fly to his face, holding it between my 2 palms as I shriek and moan, pressing my forehead against his again.
"Calum, please. I am begging you." I say, dragging in a sharp breath.
"What do you want, kitten? Use your words, tell me what you want." He demands. He has that voice that he uses to command his men, that make people melt to his every will.
"I want your cock, I want you to fuck me. I want you to make me cum around your cock. Please, baby." My lips fall open as his fingers curl up against my spot, pressing on it until he sees my eyes darken in lust.
He doesn't comment on my pathetic cry for him, he only retrieves his hand from between my thighs and turns me around, pressing his body against my back.
Calum pushes my hair to the side, freeing my neck and then hicking my dress up until my ass is bare. In the flash of a second, he is lining up to my entrance, pushing me softly until my chest is resting on the railing.
I hiss as he thrusts inside me, my hand going straight to grip the cold metal.
"Fuck me, princess... You are so tight around my cock." He groans, holding onto my hips harshly. I am sure my skin will be bruised when he lets go of my body, the spots where the pads of his fingers are pressing onto will be covered in blueish marks.
Every time we have sex he leaves a mark on my body, sort of like a map, or a reminder of every place he has touched me. I wear them proudly, even under my clothes, their presence making me feel him on my body every moment of my day.
He bucks his hips away from me, completely thrusting out of my cunt and making me whimper at the loss of contact. I did not mean to protest, nor let him know his action affected me, but the whimper fell from my lips without my absolute awareness.
"Aw, kitten. So desperate for my cock?" He asks me tauntingly. I just whimper again, turning my head to look at him, finding him with a smirk on his face.
He strokes his cock along my slit, rubbing the head of it around my entrance before sliding in again, finally offering me some relief.
His right hand snakes expertly down between my legs, reaching my sex and pressing his middle and ring finger on my clit. I shiver down to my core, straightening up and pressing my back against his chest.
"Calum." I yelp as his fingers begin rubbing on my throbbing bundle of nerves.
"You want security to hear you, baby?" He asks me, whispering it in my ear. His teeth find my earlobe, pulling on it slightly and prying a cry out of me.
"I don't care." I reply, but I can feel my cheeks heat up at the thought. It wouldn't be the first time we would be heard, nor the last.
"You don't care, huh? You want Travis to know how well I fuck your tight little cunt? You want him to know how much of a desperate slut my innocent flower is?" He asks me again, cockiness dripping from his voice.
"I don't care. Let him know. Let everyone know. Just fuck me." I plead and he chuckles, thrusting fast inside me. His fingers work at the same tempo, rubbing my sensitive clit with vigor.
He fucks me like it is the last time he ever will, making sure I hear him grunt and curse under his breath. There is nothing I want more than kissing him right now, having his moans and grunts vibrate in my mouth. But purposely he has positioned us like that, so I can't reach his mouth.
"Shit, baby. You are going to be the death of me." He growls as I back my ass on him, meeting him mid-thrust.
"I need to cum. Please." I whimper in a high-pitched tone. I am pulsing around him already, my stomach aching from the tightness.
"Oh yeah? So soon?" He asks me. He is so cocky about this achievement, bringing me to an edge so fast, but I know that he is on his very limit, holding back so he will feel me pulse around him before he pulls out and cums.
"Please. I need to. It hurts so well." I cry out and he coos at me.
"Aw, my baby. Her little cunt craves an orgasm." His breath is short and forced, I can feel him sweat as he approaches his climax.
"Don't pull out tonight. I want to feel all of you, every single aspect." My words are barely coherent, but Calum makes sense of them, cursing my name at the sound of my suggestion.
"You sure it's not the wine talking?" He asks me and I nod.
"It's not. Cum inside me." I nearly demand, to which Calum responds with a slap on my clit. I nearly scream, my sex pulsating in surprise.
"Fuck." I yelp, resting my head on his shoulder and arching my back. It is a silent orgasm, but holy fuck a powerful one. I am limp with exhaustion as I come down from my high, my eyes filled with sparkles, and tears rolling down my cheeks.
"Fuck it, I can't hold on any longer." Calum glues his hips on mine, emptying his load inside me. It is an exciting feeling, something I have only felt before a handful of times.
"Fuck me, I love you so much." He whispers in my ear, meaning it to be heard only by me, and no one else, as if the world is watching us.
"I love you." It falls from my lips easily, without even having to think about it twice. I love him, in spite of all logic. I love him because my heart needs no logic.
"I'm cold." I mumble, eyes still shut and head still resting on his shoulder.
"We should head in, then. I would hate to have you sick... You make a horrible patient." He teases me and I scoff.
"Fuck off. I am wonderful at all times." I chuckle and he hums.
"That you are." He kisses my temple tenderly before he pulls out of me.
--
"Wake up, princess... It's time to go to work." Calum whispers in my ear, tracing a pattern on my shoulder. I grump and turn, burying my face in his chest.
"Hey, Cal... Remember all the times you offered to buy the store and be my boss's boss so I get special treatment?" I ask and he laughs.
"I do."
"It's time to make an offer. I'd appreciate it if the deal was done before 9." I mumble and he chuckles at me, pecking on my forehead.
"You are finally ok with laundrying?" He asks me and I groan.
"Way to ruin everything..." I protest and he strokes my hair slowly.
"Can't we stay in bed today? Just lounge in..." I suggest and he sighs deeply.
"I thought you liked the flower shop." He mumbles and I shrug.
"I do. But I am so tired."
"Told you you shouldn't have stayed up to binge that stupid series."
"You are not the boss of me."
"A minute ago you wanted me to be."
"You are too smart, you know that? It's annoying."
"Come on, get up. You are going to be late and the ficus is going to die of dehydration."
"Eh, don't say that..." I groan before leaving a peck on his chest and getting up from the bed.
"I am going to be late home today. Don't wait up, ok?" Calum states, getting off the bed right after I do.
"How late?" I ask, furrowing my eyebrows together as I slip my feet into my slipper.
"I don't know. Definitely after midnight."
"That late." I sigh in defeat.
"I know, I know."
"And I was hoping I'd see you a bit today."
"Is that a complain?" He asks me playfully, walking over my side of the bed.
"A tiny one. It's been a month since our last date night..." I tilt my head to the side and he hums, gripping my chin to make me look at him.
"What if I promise you a getaway? A weekend retreat, just me and you." He suggests and I cock an eyebrow at him.
"A retreat where?" I ask and he bites the inside of his cheek as he thinks about it.
"Somewhere warm and sandy. You look so good in bikinis..." He pushes a curl of my hair behind my ear.
"Malibu?" I ask excitedly and he hums.
"I can make it happen. I can find a secluded place, just for me and you... A place where clothes will be optional, nearly forbidden..." He trails off, his index finger tracing down the side of my neck.
"Mr. Hood... If I didn't know you better, I'd say you are trying to seduce me." I fake gasp as his gaze is fixed on my neck.
"If I didn't know you better, I'd say it's working." He teases and I burst into a light laugh.
"Go get ready for work. Be a good flower girl today, and I'll make sure you wake up to a great surprise tomorrow." He pecks the tip of my nose, making me giggle at the ticklish feeling.
"Do you know where Calum is?" I ask Travis who I assumed stayed back for my protection. Several of Calum's men are missing today, along with Calum of course. The house is still an impenetrable fort, naturally, with a dozen men guarding the entryways, and that's who I can see only. But Travis, my boyfriend's trusted gunman, stayed behind, to guard his most valuable possession, me. It's quite romantic to think about, actually.
Travis stares at me, obviously not bending to my question. He is not going to snitch on Calum, whose mantra is 'The less (Y/N) knows, the better.' So I decide not to pressure Travis and save my energy for something better.
"I'll take a shower and head to the sitting room. I'd appreciate it if I was left alone." I state, making the man nod at my demand.
"What would you like for dinner?" He asks me and I grimace, shaking my head.
"I am not hungry." I reply, making my way to the bedroom.
"He is going to be pissed if you don't eat." Travis reminds me and I shrug.
"Well, that's a problem he and I will have to face." I reply, making the man sigh in defeat.
Curling up in the armchair Calum usually sits on, I open the book I've just bought this afternoon. It's a love story, a fictional tale of romance between a commoner and a mafia boss. It's funny, sort of surreal reading the epic tale of how dark and glamorous this love is when in reality, not a single story could commemorate what an ordinary and simple love it is. Still, those stories manage to capture an aspect of it; the worry and heartache, the constant fear that his life is in danger.
I didn't realize that I have fallen asleep in Calum's armchair. I did not realize I was asleep, not until the commotion woke me up. It's not too loud, almost as if they are trying to be quiet in their rush. But when you live with Calum, you learn to pick up even the slightest noise.
I quietly follow the noise; there are no signs of struggle, and surely, if there was an intrusion, Calum's men would have rained fire upon them.
I push one of the men standing in the kitchen's doorway, making my way inside the crowded room. Amidst the room lays Calum on the island, the sight alone making my heart stop.
The man moans and grunts, occasionally hissing as one of the men try to fix the wound on his bicep.
"What happened?" I ask, but my voice is only a whisper.
"What. Happened?" I demand to learn. Now everyone's eyes are on me, including Calum's who is now cursing through gritted teeth.
I feel a pair of hands trying to wrap around my body, starting to drag me out of the room. I put my weight on my foot, stomping on the man's toes, who lets me go and winces.
"Anyone who thinks it is a good idea to even touch me right now, I will cut your hands from the shoulder. Now, what happened?" I ask. It is almost an animalistic bark, a dog snarling at predators. All remain silent, looking at Calum, who is tightening his teeth and keeps his eyes shut to endure the pain.
"Everyone out." I demand, lunging forward and climbing on top of the island. I take a fresh gauge and saturate it with alcohol, pushing the man's hand away.
"Everyone, out." I demand again, pressing the gauze on the wound. Calum screams but soon manages to find his breath.
"Are you all deaf? Did you not hear her?" He asks his men. Hesitantly, but almost in sync, the men walk out, except the man who was tending to Calum's wound until now.
"Is the bullet still inside?" I ask him. I know my face is fuming red right now, and I can barely keep myself from full-on sobbing.
"No, but it is a deep wound." The man replies and tries to assist me.
"Then out. Leave."
"But..."
"I know what to do. Leave." I demand.
"It's ok, Leo. You can go." Calum assures the man. He leaves the room, looking at us throughout his exit.
I grab the kit that was left aside and bring it closer to us before I take a look at the wound. It is not too deep, luckily, but seeing my love like that brings out my worst thoughts.
"It's just a scratch, it just stings." Calum mumbles.
"That's a lot of blood for just a scratch." I comment, sniffling to stop myself from crying.
"It's superficial. It's just the alcohol that makes me wince." He assures me. I nod my head and pick out a clean dressing for the wound.
"We were in one of the clubs. Things got out of hand, but I am ok." Calum explains.
"Yeah..." I bite the inside of my cheek to keep myself from screaming.
"(Y/N), listen to me, please." He sounds desperate, but all my focus is on fixing him.
"Baby, I am here... I am ok. This is nothing..." He assures me.
"Shut up. Literally, shut your mouth." I have reached my breaking point, sobbing as I clean his wound.
And Calum seems to follow my demand, staying silent as I care for his injury. After wrapping it in a mesh gauze and securing it with a bandage clip, I jump off the island and pick up the blood-covered gauze. I am tired, to the verge of exhaustion, but the thought of seeing his blood tomorrow morning when I'll be drinking my coffee is enough to give me the absolute required energy to pick everything up and clean the mess.
"Head to bed, you need to rest." I command, not daring to look at him. I can't, I don't have the mental nor the emotional energy of going through my macabre thoughts again.
"Aren't you coming?" He asks me, carefully getting off the marble-top counter as well.
"I need to clean your blood off the marble... And I need a shower." It is as if I am looking at alien hands. The amount is not much, but I have his blood on my palms, from pressing the gauze on his wound.
"I can get someone else to clean up. Come to bed with me." He invites me. I know he is trying to soothe me to the best of his abilities, but I cannot, for the life of me, go to bed right now, no matter my exhaustion.
"Go to bed, Calum." I turn my back to him, bending down to reach the cleaning supplies cabinet.
Silently, after a loud sigh, Calum makes his way out of the room, leaving me and the blood stains alone.
I scrubbed every inch of the island and then devoted the remaining of my energy to scrubbing away the blood off my skin. I contemplated using one of these steel sponges, the ones my mom used to use when the pots and the pans were covered in grease, but my hands were already wrinkly by the time I was done cleaning them.
I could not bring myself to sleep next to Calum, something in the idea even repulsed me. So, I checked on him, finding him snoring on his side of the bed. I fixed a pillow under his arm, bringing his limb to heart-level to avoid swelling as the all-knowing internet suggested, placed a kiss on his parted lips, and made my way to the lounge, where my book was still left, open, page-down on the leather armchair, waiting for me. I was wrong; the book did not prepare me for the heartache of my love's life being in danger, nor even for a simple injury of his.
Morning rolls and finds me still awake, despite the apparent exhaustion. I find it futile to wait for the alarm of my phone to go off, so I get up from the armchair and make my way to the master bathroom. Calum is still in our bed, asleep, and had not moved an inch since I checked on him last night. I thank whoever is up there for that; his hand stayed still and I won't have to worry about the wound rebleeding.
I stand under the scorching hot water, letting it wash away my tiredness. I have to remind myself that Calum is still alive, that he is in the room just outside the door, sleeping, breathing, still warm, with blood pumping into his veins. He is here, he is going to be here when I get back from work, no one will take him away from me. I have to remind myself of all that, or else I will fall apart. There is only one question that eats away my insides. Who hurt him?
Travis is right outside the bedroom door when I exit it.
"Do you always stand here waiting?" I ask him and he gives me a small, empathetic smile.
"How is he?" He asks me. He worries about his commander; after all the years of being his right hand, they have formed a bond.
"He is asleep. Let him rest, and change the bandage at the noon. Call that doctor that patches you up for antibiotics. He is fine now, but we don't want the wound to get infected." I state and Travis nods his head.
"I'll make sure of it. Ricky is waiting in the car for you. You should grab something to it."
"You are not the boss of me, nor my babysitter. What I should or should not do, is completely up to me."
"I only said it 'cause you haven't eaten since..."
"Worry about the person you are supposed to worry about. Maybe we wouldn't be in this position if your focus was on him and not micromanaging me."
"I wasn't in the incident." He protests.
"That's exactly what I am saying." I move away from the man. He is not the person I should let it out on. He is not at fault here, and frankly, maybe he doesn't deserve to deal with my angst first thing in the morning. But I have been bottling things inside since I saw Calum in the state I did last night, and it was my time to burst.
Work was almost mechanic today, I could not focus on anything else but the minutes running towards heading back home again. It was excruciating, time has never passed so slowly.
I thought it would be a relief when I'd step into the house, but my chest feels even tighter now. In any other case, I'd say I am being too dramatic, but this just feels too real. What if next time it is more than just a scratch?
I enter the room, finding Calum sitting in bed, watching something on his laptop.
"Is it 5 already?" He asks me and I squint at him, earning a laugh from my boyfriend.
"I was counting the minutes for you to be here. How was your day?" He asks me, patting the spot next to him on the bed. I kick off my shoes and slip off my clothes, raxing my body before crawling to bed next to him.
"How are you feeling?" I ask him, pointing at the bandaged arm.
"Good. I can't move it with ease, but I am ok. Doc came this morning and checked me out. She said whoever tended to my wound did an excellent job. She gave me some antibiotics for a week. How are you, baby? It must have been difficult for you last night." He strokes my cheek with his free hand and I shrug my shoulders.
"Travis told me you haven't eaten since yesterday morning... You are supposed to be eating, you know?" He comments and I roll my eyes, folding my arms before my chest.
"I am also not supposed to be patching up bullet holes, but here I am..." I retort, anger apparent in my voice.
"I am sorry. I haven't slept all night, and I am still in shock." I admit and Calum nods, seemingly understanding my angst.
"It's ok, princess. You can let it all out on me." He soothes me, letting me lean my head on his shoulder.
"I was so scared last night..." My bottom lip trembles as I let it out, the image becoming vivid in my mind again.
"I can't stop thinking of what would happen if it wasn't just a scrape. I can't stop thinking of what would happen if I lost you." I wrap my arms around his torso, burying my face in his chest.
"I promise you, I am not going anywhere. Nothing bad will ever happen to me. You are stuck with me for a very long time..." He jokes, pecking the top of my head.
"You better be... Just a scratch and I want everyone's head on a spike."
"Everyone's?" He asks me, surprised by my aggression.
"I am not joking, you know. I want to find the person who shot at you and rip their heart out of their chest." I groan and Calum laughs at the comment.
"You are so cute when you get all murderous." He coos at me and I throw him a deathly glare.
"Calum, I am very serious."
"That's what I am worried about. So, let's talk about something else, something that makes you less serious. Like the trip to Malibu." He suggests, stroking his fingers down my shoulder.
"What trip to Malibu?" I scoff.
"The one you and I are off to Friday evening. I will pick you up after work, you'll have your bag packed already, and we will drive down to Malibu, where we will stay all weekend long, just me and you."
"What about your arm?" I ask and he hums playfully.
"My arm will be fine. I'll take my antibiotics, and thankfully I have the best care in the world, who will change my bandages if needed..." He kisses the top of my head once more, holding me even tighter to his body.
"Come on, I have to eat to take my antibiotic and you have to eat because I can hear your stomach complaining. And then we can take a nap, 'cause I don't know about you, but I am feeling a bit tired." He suggests and I nod my head.
"Yeah, I am a little sleepy too." I admit, yawning softly.
-
"...Make sure you move the orchids away from the window before closing for the night. They will be fried in the morning sun... And tomorrow at the opening, I have left you a list of the plants that need fertilizer. Don't overdo it." I list to the girl that works part-time and is replacing me for the weekend.
"OK. I got it." She assures me.
"And the roses, they will be delivered tomorrow morning. Make sure you put them in the fridge, move the old ones to the front." I instruct her, and she nods.
"I have done this before. I will be ok." She replies. I can see she is fed up with me, and she is looking to get rid of me. Luckily, she is saved by the entrance bell, which signals that someone is here.
"I got it." I announce, turning my head to find Calum in the front of the store.
"Don't you have to leave?" She asks but I brush her off.
"Hello, sir. How can I help you today?" I ask playfully and Calum throws me a side smirk, one of those he wears so well.
"I need 2 dozens of sunflowers. My girlfriend likes them a lot. And I upset her this week, so I want to make up."
"I am sure she is not that mad at you anymore." I reply, moving to the fridge to bring out the vase of sunflowers.
"I know. I just want to spoil her, you know. I am taking her away on a little trip, I promised her it would be just the two of us." He winks at me as I begin picking out the sunflowers one by one.
"Pick the prettiest ones. They won't compare to her beauty but maybe they'll come close enough." He says softly.
"Calum..." I coo and he smiles at me softly.
"Oh my God, how do you even know my name?" He asks me playfully. I throw my head back, looking at the ceiling as I close my eyes.
"My coworker over here is going to finish your bouquet because I am actually off the clock. I gotta get ready to leave, my boyfriend is taking me on a little trip, just the two of us." I sass, gesturing for the part-time worker to come finish the flowers for me.
"Is he taking you somewhere nice?" He asks me with a cocked eyebrow.
"He better be." I squint my eyes at him, leaving to the back of the store where I keep my stuff.
"Thought it'd be just the two of us..." I comment as I slide into the backseat of the SUV. My flowers are already waiting for me in the middle seat and Calum looks at me with a somber expression, pointing at his wounded arm.
"I can't drive that well. Travis and Lu are only driving us, they'll be elsewhere during our stay."
"You won't even notice we are with you." Travis turns to look at me.
"Oh, I am noticing. This is not what I was promised." I point out to the front of the car, to the two men, who I have nothing against. Nothing but the fact they keep showing up to my moments with Calum.
"(Y/N), baby... You have to understand."
"Yeah, I always have to understand." I brood, crossing my arms before my chest and sliding on my seat.
"Start the fucking car." I groan, turning my head to look outside the window.
Still sulking in silence, the driver takes an exit to a road down by the beach. It is sunny and warm outside, and if I wasn't so angry at Calum, I would be smiling and thinking of all the fun we would have under the sun this weekend. It is such a minimal thing for me to be mad about, but I hoped it would be just me and him, for the whole weekend. No one from his life that would constantly remind me we are not safe. I was just looking for two days of it, nothing more, 2 days and then we could go back to business. But I can't even have that, apparently.
"Boss..." Travis mutters, getting Calum's attention. Calum hums, taking his eyes off the scenery outside the window.
"We are being followed." Travis comments, darting his eyes to the rear-view mirror. He seems calm and collected, and so does the man on the shotgun.
"Are you sure?" Calum asks. Obviously, I am the only one whose heart is about to jump out of their chest.
"They have been following us since the exit." Travis replies and Calum turns to me.
"Duck." He commands, trying to look at me assuringly.
"Maybe it is a coincidence..." I mumble, unfastening my seatbelt.
"Fire a warning." Calum instructs and the man next to Travis nods. I curl on the floor before my seat, barely a second before the man puts his arm through the window and fires a warning shot in the air. I yelp at the sound, still not used to the sound of a gun firing. Calum has slid down his seat, jaw tensing as he waits for a response or its absence. I am praying it is just a coincidence that there is a car following us since the exit. Just a coincidence and now the other driver will think we are just gun-crazed idiots and we will go on to enjoy our little beach trip.
But of course, the prayer is futile and seconds later there is a response, a shot fired, not in the air like our warning, but a shot straight into the car, piercing through the glass in the back and sticking in the front, shattering the glass into a spiderweb-like pattern.
"Shit." Travis curses. He is no longer calm, his voice fluctuating.
"Hand me the gun." Calum points at the glove compartment.
"No, Cal." I nearly demand it, but the gun is in his hands in split seconds.
"Shut up." Calum growls at me, peeking up before he shoots. I count 4 shots, and then I hear the car behind us screeching.
"Petal to the metal and head to a safe." Calum commands Travis who is already speeding as it is. l can feel my whole body shaking violently, panic taking over me, and my surroundings are not so helpful to ease the feeling. There are glasses everywhere, I can see Calum is scratched up, and Travis's vision is too limited for him to be running like that. I close my eyes, shutting them tightly to focus on something else, anything else. My mind wants to go to my happy place, but at every rough turn, I seem to lose my way there.
The drive to the safe house was a nightmare for me, a never-ending type of car ride. And the house is the exact opposite of what I had pictured for the weekend. Almost buried underground, it is humid and stuffy, a claustrophobic's worst scenario.
"Find out who the car belonged to... We need to know who wants to scare me and why." Calum barks the order as he grabs the first aid kit from the cardboard.
"Scare? They wanted you dead." It is no time for hysteria, but here we are.
"If they wanted me dead, I'd be dead." Calum looks at me as if he just now notices I am still here.
"Travis, make sure she is not hurt, remove the glasses from her hair, and tell someone to pack all her things from the house." Calum requests.
"Where are we going?" I ask Calum, who picks a glass out of his already hurt arm.
"You are leaving. We are over." He is not looking at me, and he sounds cold and determined.
"No, we are not. What are you talking about?" I ask him and he pounds his fist onto the wall.
"Don't you see you can't stay with me? You are not safe. I will give you all the money you need to have a comfortable life. Just go, please."
"I look pretty solid to me... I am in one piece." I retort and Calum glares at me.
"You could have gotten hurt today. You have to leave me, you have to be safe." He sighs.
"If you want me safe, you have to be the one to keep me. I am not leaving you, end of discussion. Now, I'll go remove the glasses from my hair. By myself." I announce looking at the three men in the room with determination.
Calum only decides to join me in the small bedroom way late at night. Still awake from the tension, I welcome him silently, lifting the corner of the blanket for him to climb under. Calum sits on the edge of the mattress, kicks off his shoes, and sighs, shoulders slouching forward. Tiredness is written all over his body, I can tell without even having to take a look at his face.
He turns his head to look at me, his eyes only half-open.
"Why don't you just leave?" He asks me. His under eyes are puffy and dark, he needs a lot of rest immediately.
"Because you don't want me to leave. It is the shock speaking. It was the first time I was in actual, immediate danger. You got scared, and now your fear is speaking instead of you. You love me, Calum. And I love you. So as long as there is this between us, I won't leave. I told you already. If you want me safe, keep me safe." I reply, stroking my hand down his forearm.
Calum sighs, giving up the argument for the night, but something in my heart tells me he is not done trying to convince me to leave him. He slides towards me, getting under the blanket with me and letting me wrap my arms around his waist and spoon him. I rest my head in between his shoulder blades, closing my eyes and letting my heart sync with his.
-
"I think I need a meal and a warm shower..." I mumble as we enter our house. We left the safe in the middle of the night and took as many diversions as possible to make sure we were not followed by anyone. And now, Sunday evening and we are both more tired than we were when we began this weekend of relaxation.
Calum doesn't respond to my comment but rubs his temples with a soft sigh.
"Why don't you head in for a shower, and I will get started on the food? I'll even make you some coffee." I suggest, smiling at my boyfriend who is still very much somber.
"That's what we'll do... Go in for a shower." I encourage him, before heading to the kitchen to make something quick.
Deciding on a quick stir fry noodles dish, I pour water into a pot to make the noodles. Sighing a deep breath, I try to shake off the goosebumps that have risen on my skin since I stepped in here. It is not easy for me, but this is my home, and I refuse to let anyone take my comfort in this house away from me. I have to shake it off, I have to pretend I am ok. Maybe if I do, Calum will forget about this whole, ridiculous sending me away thing.
The food has been already served on the plates, and it has turned cold long ago. Yet, Calum is still not on the table with me. My stomach is rumbling, demanding food that is not crackers and canned tuna. I decide I have waited enough, and pull my plate closer, picking up my fork and digging in my portion.
--
Calum has been distant for the past 2 weeks since the car shooting incident. I can say that in the past 14 days, I have barely talked with him for more than 3 hours. I know he is still worried about my safety, and I know he is only pretending, but that doesn't mean his behavior doesn't fucking hurt me.
None of his men even talk to me, obviously to their boss's request, so I am just left alone with no one to even exchange a word. I grit my teeth and pray I last without breaking down until Calum realizes he is not winning this round.
The house seems empty, a weird, chilling aura in the space as I enter it. Travis is not in his usual spot in the hallway, which is even creepier. A spark goes off in my heart, the thought that Calum might have kicked everyone out just for us to be left alone and have one of our old-time dates. I smile to myself and rush to the kitchen, my heart beating fast in anticipation. Yes, just finally back to normal.
But the kitchen is empty and there is no sign of Calum, not anyone else. Of course, the disappointment I am experiencing right now is on me, no one else but me is to blame for my stupid expectations. I pound my fist onto the marble-top island, before letting out a scream; it's not like anyone will hear me and judge me for being on the verge of hysteria.
Crying about it won't help. And neither will drinking by myself, but I guess I am doing both. I can't fucking take it anymore, I can't fucking bear his behavior any longer, but I have to, I have to since I am hopelessly in love with him. That doesn't mean I can't think he is an asshole. I don't even know how I can shake him out of his funk anymore. All I want is for things to go back to normal. All I want is for him to show me he still loves me.
For 5 days the house was empty. No one even called to check on me. I thought I almost lost my mind when I saw Calum coming into the bedroom. I shot up from the bed, looking at him as if I saw a ghost.
"Where the fuck were you?" I ask, not even trying to be subtle about this.
"Are you interrogating me?" He asks me. He sounds like he has been expecting this, like he has been planning for this.
"Yes, I am. I have been left alone in this house for 5 days. I had to walk a mile each morning to take a cab for work because apparently, you didn't even think of leaving two men behind for my commute. You didn't even bother to call me, check up on me. So, yeah, I am interrogating you. Where the fuck were you?" I ask, placing my hands on my waist.
"It's none of your goddamn business where I was. Now shut up, I need to sleep."
"Calum, stop being an asshole to me. Just tell me where you were... And tell me why you didn't even reach out to me out of decency even." I snap and Calum scoffs, standing up from the bed as well.
"Because you are not the center of the universe. Deal with it. I have had enough of your crap, and your demands, and your fucking feelings. You wanted to stay, suck it up now."
"Suck it up?" I ask, my voice trembling.
"Deal with the fact you are not that fucking important." He spits it out, grabbing his things from the bedside table before he walks out of the room, probably off to sleep in a guest room.
No matter how hard I try to remind myself he does not mean all that, I can't stop myself from feeling devastated as the words still echo in my ears.
-
"The driver is waiting for you at the front." Travis states as I exit the bedroom.
"I'll take an uber..." I mumble at him, fixing my backpack on my shoulder. Travis wraps his hand around my wrist, trying to stop me from leaving the house.
"Uber is dangerous. You'll take the car." He hisses the order. I pull my wrist away from his grip, staring at him in anger. I know he is going to snitch to his boss about my temper.
"Your boss didn't seem to consider the danger when he left me all alone all these days. I'll be fine, and don't ever touch me or speak to me like that again. Am I clear?" I ask the man who chuckles at me before he grabs me by my jaw and forces me to look at him. I gasp, shocked by his behavior. He usually just takes whatever I throw at him, never has he retaliated.
"Listen here, you little bitch. The whole world doesn't revolve around you, and none of us are here to put up with your stupid brattiness. So get in the car, or just fucking get killed already. I couldn't care less." He lets go of my jaw, causing me to stumble a few steps back from the release.
"What the fuck did you just do?" I ask, my fingers pressing on the spot he was gripping onto.
"You think you are so important in here but you are just a glorified cum dumpster for Calum. We all just go along your quirks for his sake, but God, we hope he finds someone else to drain his balls soon so you can get the hell out of here." Travis replies; he looks at me as if I murdered his whole family, like I am the worst of the worst.
"Yeah, I am not your biggest fan as well." I sniffle, turning away to leave before I burst into tears before him.
I just can't wait till I get back from work and tell Calum how his right hand treated me today.
In a gesture of starting anew, I bought a bouquet of tulips from the flower shop, to brighten up the home a bit. I want a fresh start with Calum, or better explained, I want to go back to how things were with Calum before the stupid ambush and the shooting. Maybe if he sees me go back to my normal behavior, he will go back to my sweet old boyfriend.
I rush inside the house, eager and excited to create some romantic atmosphere for me and Calum. I'll start with the flowers, then a nice bubble bath for both of us, then I'll set the balcony up for dinner. It will be like our special little dates, and we will laugh and kiss, and for the first time in nearly a month, we will sleep together, and I'll put my head on his chest and hear his heart beating only for me. I smile to myself at the thought, but the smile fades as Travis steps in my way.
"I wouldn't go to the bedroom if I were you." He comments, tilting his head to the side. I can hear some muffled noises coming from the bedroom, which makes my eyebrows furrow together.
"Good thing I don't do what you'd do, then." I move away from him, opening the door to the bedroom.
I don't even have to take 2 steps inside before I realize what is going on. On my bed, the bed I share with the love of my life are 2 women, both of them clad in lingerie that leaves nothing to the imagination, one by each side of my boyfriend, who is laying on his back, with his cock in the blonde's mouth, and a hand pressing down on her head to take him further.
"What the...?" I manage to mumble, the bouquet slipping from my hand. I am shaking and I can tell that I am on the verge of collapsing, my breathing becoming forced, almost as if I have to remind myself to breathe.
"Oh, you are back early." Calum comments casually as if I didn't just catch him cheating on me, on our bed, with not only one, but two women. The 2 women turn to look at me, the one who is sucking him off and raising her head to reveal her lipstick-smudged face.
"Don't pay her no mind... Back on it..." Calum groans, pulling the blonde's head back to his cock. I want to throw up, my stomach tight in a ball as my brain processes the scene. The brunette moves close to his cock as well, pressing her lips on the shaft the other one cannot fit in her mouth.
With my face tense, and my ego not allowing me to give him the satisfaction of bursting into tears, I move to the closet, reaching for the suitcase on the top shelf of the wardrobe.
"Asshole..." I let out a scream, finally succumbing to the temptation of stooping low.
"You asshole... I can't believe you just did that to me, after all the things we went through. After I put up with your bullshit for so long."I scream, throwing my clothes violently into my suitcase. Most of my screaming is incoherent, but that doesn't seem to bother him. He keeps on moaning, talking dirty to the women satisfying him and giving them directions.
"Fuck, baby... Just like that... You are so good with your mouth." I hear among the sounds of the woman gagging on his cock. He is not even decent enough to wait until I am out of here before he continues.
I am not sure how long it took me until I gathered all my stuff from the wardrobe, but Calum has not stopped a moment until I was done throwing things inside my bags. When I exited the bathroom after gathering my toiletries, the brunette was riding him in a reverse cowgirl position. Calum looked almost drunk in euphoria, moaning under his breath."I hope you rot in the deepest pit of hell." I sniffle, taking one last look at the man I thought loved me more than life itself.
Calum doesn't respond, only moans louder and bucks his hips up, making his lover scream in pleasure. I exit the bedroom, heading straight to the small lounge of the house to pick up the books I have there. I am not coming back in here, ever again. I am not stepping a foot in here even if my life depends on it, so whatever is left behind today is dead to me.
"I told you I wouldn't go inside if I were you." Travis mumbles as I rush towards the door to finally leave this place.
"I hope you are happy. Your collective wish came true, he found someone else to empty his balls on..." I say bitterly, the words feeling like spikes on my tongue.
(Calum's POV)
"Did they leave?" I ask Travis as he walks into the lounge.
"Yeah. They were still baffled you kicked them out right after (Y/N) left, but I gave them something extra for the frustration." He explains and I nod my head, before folding in half, bringing it to rest between my legs. I sigh, my stomach hurting as I remember her last words.
"Find out where she is spending the night. And tomorrow send two newbies in a new car to stake the florist..." I mumble, trying to focus my gaze on the marble beneath my feet.
"Ok." Travis mumbles.
"What?" I ask him, raising my head to look at him.
"Nothing... I just don't know, man. It's not my place to speak, but I am not sure you handled that in the best way possible. I am not 100% ok with how I treated her today." He admits. I clench my jaw, closing my eyes to bring myself back to sanity.
"It was the only way she would leave me."
"Why did she have to leave you? She was good, she was chill about this whole shit."
"If anything happened to her because of this whole shit, I'd kill myself. She is not safe with me, she could get hurt at any moment."
"And she is not hurt now?" Travis asks with a cocked eyebrow.
"I know she is. But eventually, she will get over it. She will meet someone new, someone who better be great to her. She'll get married, have children, and live in a beach house down in Malibu, with a backyard facing the sea and a front-yard full of flowers. She'll be ok, and safe, and loved." It hurts that I won't be the one to give her all that. It hurts that I will have to live with her absence, with the thought of her smiling that morning, sleepy smile of hers for someone else.
"How are you so sure she won't snitch on us? She knows too much, she could retaliate you."
"No, she couldn't. Not her, not my (Y/N). I don't want to talk about it anymore. Just let me know where she spends the night and make sure she has security." I command, getting up from the armchair.
(Y/N's POV)
I am not myself anymore, that much I can admit. The days since I left Calum have blurred together and I cannot tell them apart, even if I try my hardest. I have set myself on autopilot, avoiding having to think for even a second, since thinking leads to only one, recurring thought; he never loved me. It sneaks into my mind even when I am focused on something unrelated. I can be thinking of what I'd like to have for dinner, and then that tiny voice that whispers to me Calum never loved me finds its way into my ears. It is exhausting, and it feels neverending. I can't get it to shut up, I can't make it go away, so I have decided to numb myself and leave all obligations to become mechanical.
I have to try my very hardest to mask my pain when I am working. No one likes to buy flowers from the sobbing gal, and I can't afford to lose my job now, I have to pay my bills all by myself.
And it's not like I can talk about this to anyone. I have no friends in real life, and my parents are far ignorant about all this, only having met Calum twice in the years we've been together. And even if I had someone I could open up to, I wouldn't even be honest with them, since most of Calum's life is a hushed topic.
I feel like all joy has been sucked out of my life, out of my existence. And I can't help but wonder; will I ever stop feeling like that?
Tuesday evenings are usually slow, so for the past couple of hours, I have been keeping myself busy with plant care. I run a moist towel over the leaves of the ficus plant, before moving it away from the window and shutting the blinders so the morning sun won't fry the plant until we open in the morning. With 5 minutes until closing time, I did not expect the bell hanging from the door to chime. I sigh and rub my eyes, before moving toward the client.
"Hello, how can I help you?" I ask the man before me. He reaches inside his jacket, grabs his handgun, and shows me it. My breath hitches in the back of my throat, and I look at him with fear all over my face.
"Listen, the register doesn't have a lot of money today. It's the beginning of the week and people don't buy flow..."
"I am not here to rob you. And if you listen to me like the good girl you are, you won't get hurt." He stops me and I nod my head. Fuck... I can't even imagine what he is going to do to me. But if I want a chance to survive this, I have to play along with what he wants.
"Is there a back door?" He asks me and I nod.
"Good. You leave your things here, you don't make a scene, and we exit from the back." He instructs. My eyes flutter, my stomach tight in a knot as my panic starts taking over. Up to here, I have to admit, he has been awfully polite for someone who is threatening me with a gun.
"Can I at least close the store? It will raise suspicion if I don't..." I point at the blinders and the sign at the door that says OPEN.
"Don't do anything funny. I won't hesitate to use it." He reminds me of the gun he is holding as if I could ever forget. I nod my head in agreement, moving to lower the blinds and lock the door.
"Give me your things..." He orders once I am done with closing the door.
"You said I'll leave them behind..." I mumble and the man sighs in annoyance.
"Do you really want to oppose me?" He asks me and I shake my head at him, moving behind the registry to hand him my phone, my purse, and my jacket.
"Good girl, keep it like that." He praises me, in a tone that makes my gut twist.
I move ahead to exit through the back door, the man moving behind me and pressing his gun on my back. Involuntarily, I arch my back, shivers raising on my skin at the threatening sensation.
"Best behavior." He reminds me as I lock the door once we are out. Despite me nodding my head in agreement, the next I know is a hit to the back of my head and everything turning black.
Goodbye world.
(3rd Person's POV)
Her head hurts and her neck feels sore. She tries to rax her body, but it seems to be held down by restraints. She opens her eyes slowly, but the darkness of the space she is in is not so different from the darkness behind her eyelids.
Fuck, she has just realized she was abducted. She was picked up from work, by a man she has never met, who told her if she complied, she wouldn't get hurt. He lied of course, why wouldn't he? She can feel a dull pain radiating from the back of her head, where her captor hit her with the back of his gun. Nothing makes sense to her. Why her? She is just a florist, nothing more. Why would anyone pick her?
Trying to make sense of this makes her head hurt even more. Connecting the dots worsens her state and only brings her closer to a panic attack, which is certainly most unwelcome at this point.
She wants to press a hand on the back of her skull to soothe the pain, but her hands are tied tightly behind her back, with no margins of motion. Everything hurts, everything. And all she feels like doing is giving up, just letting go and dying right here, right now. There is no point in living, either way, she thinks.
She has no time perception of how long it has been from the moment she opened her eyes to the moment one of her captors came into the room she was kept. It felt like hours to her, though she is aware it could have been just mere minutes. A small lamp hanging from the ceiling, at last, gives her some sight, ending the abysmal tenebrosity she has been in.
"Good morning, sunshine." The man says mockingly. He now has a better view of the woman; she is, in all honesty, just the girl next door, no one he would expect to see with someone like Calum.
(Y/N) brings her gaze to see his face, but it is hidden behind a balaclava. Good sign, she thinks to herself. If their plan was to kill her, they wouldn't bother wearing a mask.
"What do you want?" She asks. Her voice is groggy, and her mouth and throat had dried up from the lack of water.
"Don't bother your pretty little head with that. That's something your boyfriend should worry about." The man squats down before her, pulling at the rope that keeps her bound to the chair, making sure the restraints are well tight on her body. She looks too weak and tired to fight, but he just has to make sure.
"My what?" She asks, her brain still in a haze from the hit and the shock.
"Come on, don't play it dumb. Your boyfriend, the king of the world, Mr. Calum Thomas Hood." The man says sarcastically, which brings laughter out of (Y/N). They think Calum and she are still together, how ironic. She coughs through her hysterics, her throat in pain now.
"Why are you laughing, bitch? Am I amusing you?" He asks me and she throws her head back. Her stomach aches from laughing too hard, the air feeling heavy in her lungs.
"You have the wrong fucking info. Or better, you have the most outdated information ever. We broke up, it's been 3 months. He doesn't care about me, he never did. You did all that for nothing." She coughs again, and the man chuckles at her. She makes a mental note to ask for some water, so the horrible taste is off her mouth.
"We will see about that, sunshine." He stands up and walks to the door, flipping the light switch so the lamp turns off, submerging (Y/N) in the darkness once more.
"He doesn't care about me." She shouts, hoping they realize it and end this misery.
Not long after, the light is turned on again. Even this weak ray of light makes her eyes burn, and it does not help with the headache that has been forming since she became conscious. She is not sure if the light or the absence thereof is worse for her state.
"We need you in tip-top condition if we want your boyfriend to pay up." The voice of this man is different, deeper that the previous one's. He holds a bottle of water in his hand and a plastic package with 2 triangle sandwiches inside.
"Sealed, so you don't think we are trying to poison you." He shows her the meal, before unscrewing the cap and giving her a sip of water. The sip turns to a chug, and the chug turns to swallowing half a bottle at once. Oh, divine water. How many times has she underappreciated you...
"I am not hungry... I want a painkiller, my head is going to explode." She states, catching her breath from the sudden chugging. Her diaphragm is somehow sore from swallowing so much liquid at once.
"You eat this first. We don't want you getting sick... It's not like we can take you to the doctor." The man laughs.
"He is not going to give you anything for me. He doesn't care if I live or I die. Let me go, or just kill me already, I don't care anymore. You are wasting your time." She protests. She doesn't care about her fate anymore, she is honest about that.
"We will see about that. Eat now. And be thankful that we are so patient with you." He unseals the plastic packaging and brings one triangle before her mouth.
Up to a point, he is right; they have been very patient with her, and she cannot deny it.
-
A knock on the door makes Calum raise his gaze from his notebook. It is the time of the day that no one bothers him, an opportunity for him to get his business in order. Not that he does anything else throughout the day.
"Come in." He knows it is Travis requesting entry, no one else could be this late at night, and no one else has the freedom to do so.
"There is a problem." Travis announces, taking a seat across from the man. Worry is evident in him, Calum could tell from the moment he entered through the door. Calum's guess is somehow accurate. The only thing he is missing is the awkwardness of his associate. How could he ever tell him what is going on?
"If it's not life or death, I don't care. Figure it out yourself." Calum mumbles, grabbing his glass and taking a sip from his whiskey. He doesn't want to be bothered, he hasn't been in a good mood in the past month. It was a well-known fact amongst his men that since (Y/N) left, Calum has turned into a grouch.
"She hasn't made it home for 2 nights straight. She wasn't at work either this morning. And the guys staking her out did not see her coming out of the store last night." Travis states the latest info he had on Calum's ex. He doesn't know any better way to make his boss aware of his ex's disappearance.
"Are you sure she did not sleep at her boyfriend's?" Calum asks him; he dreads the day Travis will tell him she found someone new.
"You know she doesn't have a boyfriend. Something is fishy. She always makes it home." The first part of the response was meant to soothe Calum, yet his heart has taken a dip to his stomach.
"Fuck. Fuck. Shit. She was supposed to be safe away from me." He mumbles under his breath, running a hand over his face and tangling his fingers in a few locks of hair.
"Has anyone contacted us? Have you tracked down her phone?" He asks, his mind jumping to the only logical assumption. Logical -of course-, only for those living the way he does.
"It was found in the alley behind the store." Travis announces, placing the cracked phone before his boss.
"Send people to find any cameras in the area. And make a list of all fishy behavior. Shit. If anything happens to her, I'll burn the city to the ground." Calum's knuckles have turned white from flexing his fist unconsciously, the thought of (Y/N) in danger making him want to rip his skin off in desperation. She was supposed to be safer away from him. He hurt her in the worst way possible, he had his people treat her like shit, all for nothing.
"I'll update you if I have news." Travis tries to sound optimistic, but he knows, he knows deep inside him that (Y/N) is not safe, and any news he will bring Calum will be horrible.
"No, you have 2 hours to find an answer. I don't care what you have to do. In 2 hours I am personally barging into every house in LA. Find her." He groans through gritted teeth. The scariest part for him is he means it. All these months later, he still would put his life in danger to save hers.
-
"Smile for the camera..." One of the abductors instructs her, holding a polaroid camera close to her face to take one more picture.
"Why no one listens to me? He won't give anything in exchange for me." She is becoming increasingly annoying by the minute she is in captivity, the captor thought. One of the others has already slapped her across the face to shut her up, despite clear instructions to not touch her. But now a bruise decorates her face, making her look in an even worse state. Hopefully, this will shake Calum and make him pay even faster.
"Oh, but he will after he sees those pretty pictures of you... You look like a ghost, I bet that will shake him up." The abductor admits his thought, smiling through his ski mask.
"You think he cares about me? I caught him fucking two women in our bed the day I left, he kept going while I gathered my stuff. You won't get anything for me, I am worthless." (Y/N) is not even trying to get them to release her, just to end her misery.
"Oh, princess... Why the pessimism? Show me the good side now." He turns her face, taking a picture of the bruise on her left cheek. Now he understands why she has been begging them to just shoot her; she is broken. Of all the horrible things he could accuse Calum, breaking women wouldn't be in his options.
"Wanna blow on it?" He asks her, shaking the first polaroid in front of her face. It is a power move, ballsy and obnoxious, and (Y/N) scoffs but complies. She catches a glimpse of the way she looks in the picture. So, this is how she will look as a corpse, she thinks to herself.
"How long have I been here?" She asks, feeling her limps already sore.
"Why, are you tired of us already?" The man asks back.
"I need to stretch. Please, untie me, let me move for a little." She begs but the man chuckles.
"I think you confuse the kindness we have showed you this far with stupidity."
"I can't feel my legs, please."
"No wonder he cheated on you. You are always fucking complaining." The man scoffs before turning off the light and exiting the room. There is nothing more for her to do, she just throws her head back and prays all is done soon.
-
"This just came in." Travis announces, handing Calum a manilla envelope. It has no name, no address on it, it is just blank paper.
He tears it up, fishing inside it for its containings. 3 plastic square pieces, 3 slick polaroids which he doesn't know if he has the guts to take a look at. Will it be a sick powerplay exhibition, with the love of his life already dead and rotting? Or a warning, with her just beaten and broken, violated by scumbags an enemy paid? He bites his tongue and tightens his jaw, bringing the photos out of the envelope as he takes short, harsh breaths. He has to know, he has to know how much wrath he will unleash on the people who are hurting his (Y/N). Although, the amount of wrath won't be so different for each case.
"They fucking hit her..." He growls, his eyes going wide at the first picture. His (Y/N), the love of his life and the light of his existence, with a bruise on her left cheek, bound on a chair. She looks pale and tired and she looks like she has already given up. It is certainly not the worst he could have seen her, but it still makes him want to hang the ones that did this to her from a hook from the ceiling.
"Find them." He gives Travis a picture that shows a little bit of the background. It's like looking for a needle in the haystack, but it is a clue, and Travis will do anything to figure out the clue.
Before Travis could even take the picture from Calum's hands, his phone rings. An unknown number of course, finally a move from their side for ransom. Calum motions Travis to be quiet before he answers the call.
"Calie boy... Finally, we are talking." The voice on the other end says. Calum has heard this voice before, he knows the man, he is sure of it.
"Who is this?" He asks, even though he knows the man won't give him a straight answer.
"Oh, come on... You have already forgotten me? Tsk tsk tsk... How disappointing... And I thought I left a mark on you. Well, a scar." The man laughs and Calum scoffs in realization. The man who shot him that night, Roman... something... God, Calum never bothered with learning names.
"What do you want?" He asks, trying to remain calm. He has to, for her safety. He might not remember the man's last name, but he knows he is vile, a sadist, he has the rumor of the torturer, and Calum sweats at the thought of what he will do to his (Y/N).
"Didn't you get the pictures? She is a beauty isn't she?"
"My ex? Well, she is alright, I guess." At the thought of this slimy bastard touching even a hair off her head, Calum wants to throw up.
"Oh, no, don't say that... She is very beautiful, even now she is weary. I don't know how my guys keep their hands to themselves." Calum knows he does it to taunt him, but he can't help but hiss at the idea of them touching her.
"I don't know what to tell you. She and I are over for so long... It doesn't matter to me what you do with her." He hopes Roman lets her go. He hopes he finds another way to leverage him into doing whatever he wants him to do.
"Oh, well then... She has been telling us that. Maybe I should tell my guys to do her the favor and just kill her like she has been begging us to." Calum's ears begin ringing, a high-pitched noise filling the silence.
"What should I do, Calum? I can't keep her here much longer. Should I let her go? Or should I put a bullet between her brows? I bet that picture will be even better than the one in your hands." He asks him as if this is some sort of video game where the dead bodies piling up in the background are not real. Sick bastard, Calum thinks to himself.
"What do you want?" He asks him, his voice coming out like a growl.
"Now we are talking. I heard you had some visitors from Colombia. They came in a big ship, apparently." Roman sounds too cheerful, already knowing the coke will be his.
"You want the coke?" Calum asks with a chuckle.
"Mmm, you are smart after all. I'll send you an address, make sure you bring it there in 48 hours. I don't think Ms. Sunshine over here is going to last longer than that. 48 hours, all of it. Don't try to screw me over, 'cause your little girlfriend won't have as much fun as we will do."
"How do I know she is still alive?" Calum asks. He just wants to hear her voice, even just for a second.
"Oh, now you care for her status?"
"Just put her on the phone." Calum demands but Roman scoffs.
"Oh. It's not up to me. I don't think she wants to talk with you after your little menage a trois. Ballsy, though, I have to admit. Fucking two women while she gathered her stuff. It's not a surprise she has already given up. Time is passing, Hood. 48 hours. Tick tock, tick tock." And the line goes dead.
"Find where he holds her." Calum turns to Travis, before kicking his armchair repeatedly, angrily, pretending in his head that he is kicking Roman to death.
-
"He is not as smart as he thinks he is." Travis announces as he shows his boss a picture of a building.
"You found her?" Calum asks him hopefully. He will cover Travis in gold if he tells him he knows where (Y/N) is.
"I think so. We could trace the drive through street cameras. They used a busy street to move her. Up to a point, we could see the car, then it disappeared. But we looked at the abandoned buildings within a 5-mile radius. We found them through satellite pictures. They have her here. I send a few guys to do a drive-by, see any strange motion."
"If they have her there, there will be carnage. I don't care who is killed, kill them all. I just want her back home to me, Travis. If a hair off her head is hurt, I will burn it all to the ground."
"If she is not there?"
"We give them what they want. I don't care about anything else but her. I just need her back here. I need her here with me so I can keep her safe." He admits and Travis nods, patting his boss's back.
"We'll bring her home, boss." He assures him.
-
(Y/N)'s heartbeat picked up when she saw a man walking into the room she is kept. The first man who came in without a mask since they brought her here.
"Fuck..." She mumbles under her breath, but the man hears her and chuckles.
"Why the curse word, Ms. sunshine? Are you so disappointed to see me?" The man asks, towering well over her.
"Who are you? What do you want from me?" She asks; she is tired, and she hasn't slept at all while she has been here. She can't, she has tried to but she is too uncomfortable. The man sighs and shrugs his shoulders.
"It doesn't matter who I am. Your boyfriend already agreed to my terms... The less you know, the better."
"It doesn't matter. Calum only agreed to buy himself some time. He won't give you anything. He doesn't care. I have been telling your guys."
"Oh, but I think he is going to pay up. We have been treating you well this far, haven't we? He would hate to see that change..."
"I know you are going to kill me..." She retorts, making the man look at her with a furrow on his brow and his head tilted to the side.
"What makes you think of that?" Roman asks, curious to see her reasoning.
"You came in here with no mask. You wouldn't risk me giving a description to the police once I'd be freed. So, you are going to get what you want from Calum, if it ever gives it to you, and then you are going to hand over a dead body..." She describes, the glimpse of her state from the polaroid flashing in her brain. Roman chuckles, gripping her chin and looking down on the woman. He forces his thumb into her mouth, making her cough from the shock.
"You won't be able to talk with your tongue cut off, will you?" He asks her, and for a moment, (Y/N) believes he means it.
Roman laughs and pulls his hand away, looking at the shivering mess (Y/N) has turned into.
"I am only joking of course. For now. I found you once, I can find you again if you open your stupid mouth. And then I won't be so lenient." The man sounds serious, and he looks ready for anything.
And now (Y/N) is seriously done with her life. She will never be safe again, she will never be able to live a normal life. She can run, but she cannot hide. So she has to pray for her death, with all her courage.
-
"I still think you should have stayed back home." Travis comments as they approach the building (Y/N) is held in.
"We both know that wouldn't happen." Calum replies. When Travis told him yesterday where they keep (Y/N), Calum's first urge was to burst into this place and pick her up himself. Travis had to keep him to his sense and remind him that they would need to prepare well and that it would be ideal to take out Roman as well, get done with him once and for all. Calum's people had already seen him twice going to the building, once in the morning and once at night, so they gathered all men they could find and talked about their plan. The only thing Calum managed to tell his men before Travis took over was that (Y/N) had to return to him unharmed. And his men all agreed, not that they could have done else how. Calum was a feral beast backed into the corner, no one would dare go against his wishes.
So, on Roman's night visit to the abandoned building, they dressed in all black, girded on as many guns as they could, and braced themselves for the bloodbath that would ensue. The goal was crystal clear; kill all, kill Roman, and bring (Y/N) home unharmed.
(Y/N) has been trying to make herself fall asleep, despite the uncomfortable position she has been sitting in since she was brought in. She can no longer feel her legs, which is terrifying to think of, so she has decided to close her eyes and rest, so she won't have to think about what is happening to her. It is a futile effort, no one could ever sleep like that, so (Y/N) is startled by the loud noises outside the room. Loud voices, followed by gunshots, so many gunshots. (Y/N) realizes she is nearing her death, she will die on this chair, she will never feel her limbs again. She will die like this, ingloriously, because the man she loved has feuds all over. Fuck, she owes it to herself to be honest to herself one last time. The man she loves, the man who hurt her irreparably, the man who became the center of her existence. She still loves Calum, with all her heart, despite the time that has passed, despite everything he has done to her. She chuckles to herself; she is fucked up. She should hate Calum, she should curse the day she met him, but she can't help but have a shrivel of hope that the one causing this commotion is Calum, barging in here to save her.
The door opens with a loud bang, and the lightbulb over her head lights up, giving the room a ray of light. (Y/N) sees a man, one of her captors she assumes, now without his balaclava, pointing his gun at her. (Y/N)'s heart stops; the man's hand is shaking.
"Time to grant you your wish, bitch." The man states, pulling the trigger. She doesn't have enough time to realize where the bullet hit her. Everything goes black for her, and she falls with her back on the floor, along with the chair she is sitting on.
Calum follows the man who seems to rush away through the chaos. Roman was arrogant enough to not bring many men, so most of them scattered for their life when they saw Calum and his men barge in.
Calum's instinct kicked in when he saw one of the men rushing downstairs. He could not tell why exactly, but the first thing that popped into his mind was that he would lead him to his (Y/N).
And now, standing in the doorway of where (Y/N) has spent the past 5 days, seeing the man who has just shot the love of his life before his eyes, the only thing he wants to do is bash that man's face in, watch his blood paint the floor. Nevertheless, he suffices to putting a bullet through his skull and rushing to (Y/N), hoping he is not too late.
-
Travis walks into the recovery room (Y/N) is post-op. Calum has not moved an inch from her bedside since she got out of surgery.
"Hey. Did she wake up?" Travis asks, handing his boss a cup of coffee. Calum runs his hand down his face, shaking his head.
"Not yet. The doc said she was worn out and she needs more rest to recover." He replies, running his thumb over the back of (Y/N)'s hand. Travis reaches inside his jacket, taking out some polaroids for Calum
"I think she will need to see this when she wakes up." Travis taps his pointer finger on the first photo. Calum takes a look, seeing a picture of Roman, with blood spilling from his mouth and a wound on his chest. Calum swallows harshly, flexing his jaw as he lets the realization sink in. The person who hurt (Y/N) is dead gone, no longer a threat.
"I don't want her to see this." Calum states, handing the photos back to his friend.
"I am not exposing her to any more violence. She has had enough for a lifetime." Calum states, looking at the woman he loves laying in the hospital bed, wounded and spent, and it is all his fault.
"You should get some rest. I can stay with her for a couple of hours so you can sleep, shower, and eat something. She is still going to be here when you get back." Travis suggests, but Calum doesn't even want to think about it. He wants to be the first person she sees when she opens her eyes, so he can assure her she is safe now, hug her and tell her how sorry he is, for everything. Then he will tell her he will always keep her safe and he will never again turn her away. He will tell her how much he loves her and then he will stay with her until the end of time.
Of course, Calum didn't take into consideration the possibility that (Y/N) might not want to see him ever again.
She opens her eyes 3 days after the operation. Disoriented and confused, she can hear her breathing loud in her ears. All she can see is the white ceiling which she somehow associates with the description of the torture room of a twitted opthalmologist from a German thriller she once read. She groans, her eyes fluttering open and shut as she turns her head to the side to check her surroundings. There is a figure at her bedside, someone who is still blurry but (Y/N) can already tell who is.
"Where am I?" She asks, her voice raspy and muffled by her oxygen mask. Calum raises his head from the mattress, his heart pumping faster at the sound of her voice. In any other case, he would laugh at how her voice sounds like Darth Vader's, but now he just wants to tear up from the happiness of hearing her again.
"(Y/N) ... Shit, don't move, you are hooked to a lot of things..." Calum rushes to say, making sure she doesn't make any abrupt moves.
"What happened?" She asks as Calum comes into her sight.
"You were abducted and shot. We are in a private surgical unit, you had surgery in your abdomen to fix the bullet wound, and you have been sleeping for 3 days. The doctor said you were exhausted and you need more time to recover. Baby..." He wants to tell her he is sorry, he wants to tell her she is safe now, that he will protect her with all his power. He wants to tell her that he loves her.
But (Y/N) removes the oxygen mask so she is heard loudly and clearly.
"Leave." She demands, her eyes glazed with tears.
"(Y/N), baby, please..." He tries to soften her, but her teary eyes make him feel like the most awful person in the world.
"Leave." Her breathing is irregular, short, and rushed and he can tell he is upsetting her, he is hurting her once more.
"Ok, ok...I am leaving. I am leaving." Calum surrenders, picking up his things from the end table.
It's not the time nor the place for him to make amends. He wants her to heal, physically and mentally first, it is all that matters to him.
(Y/N's POV)
"Good afternoon, Ms. (Y/N)." The driver that used to drive me to and from work is standing at the door of my recovery room. I sigh, folding a t-shirt and throwing it into my duffel bag.
"Hello there." I smile awkwardly, waiting to see what the man wants. Calum has left a myriad of men behind him, making sure I have what I need. He hasn't yet dared to show up here, which I assume is a good thing...
"Whenever you are ready, we can leave. The car is already at the entrance." He says in a polite, merry way.
"I have already called an Uber." I reply, picking up my phone, which Travis made sure to replace after my device was destroyed during the kidnapping.
"Mr. Hood gave me clear instructions to take you home and make sure you are settled in without problems. And your doctor suggested you take it easy until you fully recover."
"Tell Mr. Hood I can take care of myself. I have been doing that for a while now." I reply, zipping up my duffel and checking my phone to see how much longer I should wait for my Uber.
"Ms. (Y/L/N), please... I will get in serious trouble if I don't follow this order. Please." He begs.
"Not really my problem, is it?" I feel bad for saying that, it's not really my character.
"Please, (Y/N). He is already furious at everyone for what happened. Please." He sounds genuinely scared which -knowing Calum,- is understandable.
"Fine. I'll cancel my ride." I sigh, giving up. The man smiles and walks in to pick up my bag. A ride back home won't hurt, I guess.
"Wait, this doesn't seem like we are heading downtown." I comment and the driver sighs.
"Please, do not panic. Mr. Hood has asked to see you." He replies, looking at me through the rear-view mirror.
"I should have left you to face his wrath..." I mumble, sitting back on my seat with my arms crossed before my chest.
"I am sorry." The driver states and all I do is shake my head. Seeing Calum one last time is not ideal, but it might be what I need to end this chapter.
It is not easy for me to be back in this house. There is a horrible taste in my mouth from the moment I entered the premises, and I can't help but dig my nails into my forearm as I walk towards the balcony. Clearly, I don't want to be here, no matter how much I have missed this place, no matter how much I have missed how things were with Calum. It is just impossible for me to forget my very last moments in this house.
Calum is sitting on the balcony, a light lunch laid before him on the table. He looks like he has been counting the seconds until I arrived, he is agitated and he has been drumming his fingers on the table, up until he realizes I am here. He almost jumps up to his feet, quickly rushing to me without a word.
"Thank you for coming." He says after a moment of just scanning me from head to toe.
"I didn't have much of a choice. Your driver basically kidnapped me." I reply, moving to take a seat away from his.
"It was the only way to get you here, I am sorry." He states, running his hand down his face.
"Did anyone even think that I might feel uncomfortable with not knowing where I am headed? Or that I might have gotten triggered by having no control over it?" I ask, fidgeting with my fitness tracker. The doctor told me that I should keep track of my heart rate since it was low post-op, so this little gadget has been strapped on my wrist for the past few days. It is pretty uncomfortable, I am still not used to it.
"I can't get anything right lately, can I?" Calum sighs, bringing a plate before me.
"Why am I here, Calum?" I ask. This is the first time we are in the same room, we are having a conversation since the breakup. Well, there was that time at the hospital, but I cannot say I was very aware of everything that was happening.
"I am not hungry." I push the plate away.
"You should be eating well if you want to heal faster." He is looking at me lucky a puppy left in the rain, which is unfair, and dirty on his side. I am the fucking victim here, he has no business trying to make me sympathize with him.
"Well, it is not your concern anymore. I am capable of taking care of myself. Why am I here?" I ask, pressing my tongue against my cheek.
"I wanted to see you." Calum is looking at his fingers, picking at his cuticles as he mumbles the phrase.
"Unbelievable." I shake my head, getting up from my chair.
"(Y/N), please, wait... Shit, just listen to me for a moment." He gets up as well, blocking me from moving further away from the table.
"Listen to what? What else do you have to say?" I ask him.
"The man who ordered your abduction is dead. So are the men who were keeping you. I put a bullet through the skull of the man who shot you. No one is going to hurt you again, baby. I am not letting anyone hurt you again. I promise you that, princess. I promise you you are safe. I am going to do everything that is in my power to help you feel safe again." He reaches to stroke my cheek, his touch making me jolt almost as if I am hit by electricity. I move away, barely able to hold my tears anymore.
"Safe? Safe, really? You want me to believe this bullshit? Where were you while I was captured? Where were you when they were hitting me? Where were you when I couldn't feel my legs, when that creep threatened to cut off my tongue? Where were you when I was begging them to put me out of my misery? I was begging them to kill me, Calum. And you are telling me you are going to do everything in your power to help me feel safe? Fuck. You." I scream; I am done holding back, I am done being quiet about what I went through. Calum stares at me with a shock on his face, certainly not expecting me to admit to begging for my death.
"(Y/N), I am so sorry." He manages to say, touching my arm to comfort me.
"Don't fucking touch me. And you know what, Calum? How am I supposed to trust you, to believe this promise you are giving me today when you have broken all your other promises to me?" I ask him. My watch begins beeping, signaling my heart rate is very high.
"I don't want to be here anymore. Please, let me go." I sniffle, shaking down to my core. I want to go home and hopefully never see him again.
Calum moves aside, letting me walk back inside the house, from where I rush to the front door without paying attention to the voice of Travis who is rushing behind me.
-
Of course, I didn't expect him to give up on me easily. For the past 2 months, I have returned more jewelry, designer gifts, and meals than I can remember. Every day he sends something different, one more impressive than the other as if I was ever impressed by material things. I have managed to maintain my dignity, if we excuse the time I stomped on the bouquet he sent me, right in the middle of the florist shop I am working at. But seriously, who sends a lackey to buy flowers from the store I am working at and then sends the same lackey to deliver the same flowers, with a ridiculously cheesy card? Fuck that, of course, I snapped, anyone would have.
I don't know if it would have been better if he tried to approach me personally. I don't know if my reaction would be calmer if he came and saw me, face to face, with the guts he claims he has. I think I would at least appreciate the courage. But I haven't seen him in 2 months, and my anger has only been boiling inside me. I would be lying if I said I don't think of him, or that I don't miss him. There are nights that I can only bring myself to sleep if I picture I am sleeping in his arms. I even bought a bottle of his favorite perfume, or better said, my favorite perfume of his. He still is the love of my life, even if I am not his. Just at the thought of someone else touching me, I get hives. It is pointless, so pointless to deny that I am looking for a good reason, a good chance to run back to him, but my ego and the sense of self-preservation keep me back.
"Ms. (Y/L/N)?" A young man asks me as he walks to the cashier of the florist shop.
"That's me." I reply, sighing as he shows me a tablet and touch pen for my signature.
"I have this envelope for you. It requires a signature." He states with a soft smile. I sigh, throwing my head back.
"Take it back to your boss and tell him I don't want anything from him." I might sound a tad bit too dismissive, but the man looks at me with a confused look.
"I am sorry, miss. This was delivered to us this morning and it has no return address. Are you going to receive it?" He asks me, still holding out the tablet for me. I sigh, reaching in my purse for a couple of bucks to tip him before I sign and get handed the envelope.
"Thank you, miss. Have a nice day." He smiles and walks out of the door, making the little bell that hangs above the door chime at his exit.
I pick up the manila envelope, looking at it with my lips pursed.
"Everything ok?" The girl that works part-time asks me. Since the kidnap and my meltdown, my boss insisted there are always two people in the store, either her or the part-timer.
"I need 5-minutes." I point at the back of the shop, and the girl nods at me.
"Of course, take your time." She is too polite, way more than I would be in her case.
I rush to the back, leaning against the counter as I tear up the top of the envelope. It is just papers inside, a couple of them that will certainly take more than 5 minutes to make sense of.
I take a look at the first paper on the stack, a photo of a house, a Mediterranean-style villa with a beautiful front yard suitable for planting flowers and trees, and all the things I always wanted. It is confusing; what am I supposed to understand from that?
I leave the picture aside, revealing the second piece of paper, which is an ownership deed, with my name on it, and all my information, lacking only my signature and notarization. My hand flies to my mouth as I realize that I almost own this house, this beautiful house that I could only dream of in my most euphoric dreams.
"Fuck you, Hood." I mumble through greeted teeth. This, this is going to be the thing I will struggle the most with rejecting, but I'll be damned if he thinks I will run back to him because he got me a house.
I mean, who does that? What normal human being buys their ex a house as a hopeful reconciliation gift?
I gather the papers and my stuff, taking off and leaving my apron behind.
"I need to go. Can you manage on your own?" I ask the girl who nods empathetically.
"I will call Evelyn. Are you alright?" She asks me and I shrug.
"I will be." I reply, exiting the shop.
Across the store, in the most ridiculously obvious way possible, there is a black SUV with 2 guys inside. It has been parked there every day since I started working again and at first, it made me shitless paranoid, until I recognized one of the guys from the hospital. All the while I stayed there, Calum had an army of guards outside my door, to "discreetly" guard me.
Up to now, I pretended I didn't see them, paid them no mind, but today that changes.
I knock on the driver's window, making the man roll it down a smidge.
"Take me to your boss. " I demand and the man looks at me in totally pretend confusion.
"I am sorry, I don't think I understand you." He says, looking at the other man for backup.
"Oh, come on. You were in the house the day Calum was shot. And you were guarding me in the hospital. So please cut the crap and take me to wherever Calum is." I am not even trying to be polite about it, it is not on my priorities for the time being.
"Get in the backseat." The driver sighs, tilting his head to invite me in.
"Do you need anything? It is a long ride." The man asks me.
"Just drive." I take out the documents from the envelope, dedicated to studying them before reaching the destination.
It takes a little over an hour to reach the destination, and nearly halfway through, I knew we were heading to Malibu. The car stops before a gate, one which it would be impossible for someone random to get through. It is the familiar security check to get through, the same as back in Calum's house.
The moment I get off the car, I see that the front yard is transformed from the picture that is in my envelope. It is full of freshly planted flowers, and a big, cozy hammock hangs from 2sterdy trees.
"What have you done, Hood?" I mutter to myself with a heavy heart. It is all I've ever dreamed of and a bit more.
"Hello (Y/N), it's good to see you again... Calum is in the back." Travis welcomes me into the house, pointing toward a big balcony window.
"Good to see me again? I thought you couldn't wait for Calum to find another glorified cum dumpster so you wouldn't have to put up with me anymore." I reply, folding my arms before my chest. Travis remains quiet for a moment, tilting his head to the side as he looks at me.
"I am sorry. Truly, I am. You should go see Calum, he is on the balcony." He says after a moment. I bite the inside of my cheek, fidgeting with my fingers as I try to decide between turning around and leaving this place forever, or heading to the back to confront Calum.
"Does he know I am here?" I ask but I know Travis won't kiss and tell so easily.
"Go see him. Please." It is all he says. I sigh and close my eyes, bracing to see him once again.
The interior of the house is almost as beautiful as the exterior, simple and calming, with creme couches and wooden floors. It looks like something out of a Pinterest board, and the more I am in, the more at home I feel.
I exit the window and find myself on the balcony, which allows me to see the backyard and the majestic view of the Malibu beach. This is my dream house, the house that I always saw in my head when I thought of my future with Calum.
"You came." Calum's voice catches my attention, right as I began getting lost in my daydream.
"Had you planned for all of these to happen? Is this some sort of a wicked game of yours, to taunt me into remembering my dreams with you?" I ask him. He is sitting casually on a little couch, a cozy little nook that will probably serve as the best place to watch the sunset.
"When you love someone, you know their reactions, you know what to expect from them." He replies, leaving his little cup of coffee down. He stands up, facing me for the first time in what feels like forever.
"Please... Calum, you don't love me. You've proved it when you fucked those 2 women in front of me. You didn't even stop to try and make an excuse for yourself. You didn't even stop when I was gathering my stuff to leave. This is your love, Calum? Because it sounds like a very fucked up definition of love."
"I love you with all my being. I wanted you to hate me so much that you would have no choice but leave me. I thought you would be safe away from me, that you wouldn't be hurt by this life. But I was so wrong, so wrong my love."
"This is empty talk, Calum. Why should I trust you? Why should I listen to anything you say?" I ask him, tears threatening to spill from my eyes as I listen to him. My heart wants to believe him, oh it wants it so badly, but my logic forbids me, it forbids me by bringing up all those violently awful memories.
"You are right. You are absolutely right. This is the last I will bother you. The house is yours. I will make sure you have security here. I want you to keep it, live here, and build the life we always dreamt of building with someone who will love you. But before you throw me out, please listen to me, one last time. After that, if you want me gone, I will be gone. You won't hear from me again, not unless you want to. Just listen to me, one last time, for 5 minutes, no more than that."
"Ok, 5 minutes. I can give you that much." I reply, leaving down the envelope I have been holding for the past hour.
"I lost half my life when they told me you were abducted. I wanted to burn the city to the ground, knock down every door myself until I would find you. And then I lost all hope when I saw you bleeding in that room. I wanted to put a bullet through my skull, and take myself out because a life knowing you are dead is not worth living. I was the one who carried you out of that place, you know. I took the shirt the man who shot you was wearing and I pressed it onto your wound, and I carried you out, and I promised you..." He stips to sniffle and pinch the bridge of his nose, trying to pull himself together. For some reason, for some fucked up reason, I understand him. When I saw him with a gun wound in his arm, all I wanted to do is rip the shooter's head off. It must have been even worse for him, seeing me passed out, worn out, halfway dead.
"I promised you that I would fix everything if you didn't die in my arms that day. I promised you I would prove my love to you all over again if you opened those beautiful eyes of yours and looked at me again. At the hospital, I was barely functional. I think I threatened the surgeon I would cement him if he didn't fix you if he didn't bring you back to me. When he brought you out of the surgical room, and he told me you would recover just fine, I hugged him, thanked him, and swore I would cover his hands in gold. You were alive, and that's all that mattered to me. I stayed with you while you were sleeping after the surgery, I held your hand so I wouldn't lose my fucking mind. It tore me apart when you told me to leave, but the last thing I wanted to do was upset you, so I sufficed to learn about you from the intel I left there, and from your doctor, who probably took pity on me. We've worked with him in the past, he usually treats whoever is shot without calling the police, but he hates my fucking guts, so I must have looked really desperate for him to pity me. I am not even sure why I am telling you all that. I don't know what to tell you, I hoped that inspiration would strike me once I began letting it out, but you are standing here, looking at me with the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen, and I remember I was the person who made those eyes cloudy with tears, I was the person responsible for almost shutting those beautiful eyes forever. I look at you and I remember I've hurt you and it is fucking difficult for me to forgive myself, how can I ever expect that from you?" He asks me, but the question is rhetorical. Is it bad that I don't want him to stop talking? Is it bad that I want to keep listening to his voice until the end of time? Fuck, I never stood a chance, did I?
"I don't know why I am telling you all this when I should be telling you I love you. I love you. Please believe me when I say I have never loved nor ever will love anyone the way and as much as I love you."
"How did you find out I was taken?" I ask, deciding it is futile to hold back my tears.
"From the moment you left that night, I had people checking in you were safe, every night. Every night I was hearing if you were alright, home, safe. I dreaded the day they would tell me you were with someone new, but I had to know you were ok, even if you were away from me. All I ever wanted was for you to be safe. I told you, I ever did what I did to turn you away from your safety. The moment you left, those women were gone. At the thought of anyone else but you touching me, I get hives. I love you with all my fucking heart, (Y/N). I never stopped, even for a moment. And I don't think I'll ever do." He admits, and I can hear it in his voice that he means it. He means it, he loves me.
"That's all. My 5 minutes are up." He sighs, and then deathly silence comes between us. I can hear the waves at the beach, even from that far, it is that silent.
Calum walks closer to me, leaning down to peck the top of my head before moving to get through the balcony window and back into the house.
For a couple of seconds, I am all alone, and it is the worst fucking feeling in the world. I don't want anything else in the world but him. He loves me, and I love him, and I am not going to deny happiness to myself anymore.
"Cal..." I shout behind him, getting inside the house as well. He turns around to look at me immediately, and my chest becomes heavy, my breath almost not coming out.
"Don't go. Don't leave me." I beg him, not thinking of anything else but falling into his arms. Calum smiles peacefully at me, staring at me for a moment before walking toward me.
"I am never, ever leaving you again. I promise you that, princess." He cradles my face in his hands softly, almost as if he is trying to test whether I am real or not, whether this is a dream and I'll dissolve to nothing at his touch or I am his again, in flesh and bone.
I decide to end this torture for both of us and lean in to kiss him, standing on my tiptoes to meet his lips. His arm wraps around me almost instantly, keeping me close to his body, not breaking the kiss, not yet. I don't know how long it has been since our last kiss, since I last felt him so close to me.
"I love you." I admit, whispering it against his lips. My fingertips graze his cheek softly, feeling the warmth of his skin under my touch.
"I love you. I love you..." He repeats, holding me as close to his body as he can.
"I've missed you, Calum... I missed you more than I was letting myself realize." I state, feeling my heart flutter as he lifts my chin up with his fingertips.
"I have missed you just as much, my love. I don't know how I lasted that long without you." He leans in for a kiss again, making my knees weak at how soft he is with me.
"I want you, Calum. I am craving you." I mumble against his lips. I can feel a tightness in the pit of my stomach, a so familiar knot that I haven't felt in so long.
"Now?" He asks me and I hum, nodding my head.
"Now. Please." I assure him, but he is still holding back.
"We don't have to do this straight away. We can wait for as long as you need." He strokes a piece of hair behind my ear, looking down at me softly.
"Please. I need you. I can't wait any longer." I know it sounds rushed, I know it is practically seconds after we admitted our feelings, but if I wait any longer, I am going to explode. I need him, all of him. I need to know we are still alright, still made only for each other. And this will be the last reassurance I will need.
"If you don't want me..." I stutter, realizing that I might be bringing him to a tough spot.
"Princess... You have no idea how much I have been wanting to press you against a wall and make you mine again..." He whispers with a chuckle, searching for the hem of my polo shirt.
"Still hate this with my all." He mumbles, lifting the garment over my head.
"Some things never change." I reply, just as Calum brings his lips to mine. Fimble fingers make their way down my waist, looking to unbutton my jeans.
"Jesus... You still have the softest skin." Calum mumbles, lowering his mouth to my jaw and meeting my sweet spot. Then he moves down to my neck, passing his tongue over my collarbone before lowering himself to my breasts, grazing the sensitive skin with both his fingertips and his lips. He moves the straps of my bra from my shoulders, lowering the cups to free my breasts.
"Shit..." He mouths, running his thumbs over my nipples.
"Cal..." I purr, desperate and on the edge by the teasing. He reaches behind my back, unclasping my bra and letting it fall onto the floor between us.
"Someone's got goosebumps..." He whispers, kneeling before me and lowering my jeans, all the way down my legs until I step out of them.
"Calum..." I groan, throwing my head back as he runs his fingertip under the hem of my underwear He kisses the soft part of my inner thigh, looking up at me with a smirk before he pushes my panties aside.
"What, princess? What is it?" He asks me, bringing two fingers to my entrance.
"Oh, honey... You are so wet. Look at that." He rubs his fingers across my slit, making me shiver at his touch.
"Do you think it is the time to tease me?"
"It is always the time to tease. Especially since I've missed how your perfect lip quivers when I do." He retorts, rubbing the tip of his finger over my entrance in circles.
"Cal..." I protest, already pulsing around nothing.
"Oh, shit. Fuck, I need you." He groans, getting off the floor and picking me up along with him. I wrap my legs around his waist, resting my hands on each side of his neck.
"The couch is very comfortable, you are going to love it." He comments, leaving me gently on the soft cushioning and leaning down closer to me to kiss me. I reach down to find the hem of his t-shirt, pulling it off of him, only breaking our kiss to take the garment off.
My hand travels down his body, reaching the waistband of his jeans. I feel the lower part of his abdomen, making him twitch at the sensation. I slip inside his jeans, my fingers wrapping around his cock.
"Oh, God..." I moan, feeling how hard he is. His cock is throbbing in my hand, and my stomach tightens at the remembrance of how good he felt inside me.
"I need you inside me... Now. Please, I am begging you." I cry out, looking at him with pleading eyes. He hums, pulling my panties down by the waistband.
"You are still mine, aren't you? After all this time you are still mine..." He asks, freeing his cock from his jeans. I stir underneath him, unable to keep still from the excitement. He rubs the tip of his cock along my slit, focusing on my clit and watching my breath hitch as he strokes it.
"Cal..." I cry out as he slips his cock inside me. My eyes shut as he slides in, inch by inch filling me up. His free hand rests on my cheek, his thumb stroking my bottom lip.
"Say you are mine. Please, tell me you are mine." His voice is raspy, so sexy that goosebumps rise on my skin.
"I am yours, Calum. I am yours." I reply, cradling his face in my hand.
He moves his hips against mine, driving his cock deeper inside me and taking my breath away.
"You feel so good. You feel so good, my love. My love. Mine, mine, mine." He breathes out, moving against me, thrusting in me slowly but with force. It is slow and mellow, and the sweetest he has ever fucked me. I can feel myself squeeze around him, a little in shock at how good he still feels inside me. It is like we are still in sync, after all this time, we are still in perfect harmony with one another.
"Cal..." I cry out softly, bucking my hips up to meet him.
"I know, I know... I can feel you." He murmurs, looking at me in the eye. I can feel everything else numb out, my eyes locking on his as he thrusts inside me, making me shiver. My stomach tightens, more heat spreading all over my body the deeper he goes.
"Fuck me... Fuck fuck fuck." I moan, pressing my nails in my palm. He has found the perfect spot, the one that makes my brain fuzzy, that makes me curl my toes.
"You have to be quiet, baby. We don't need anyone interrupting us." He chuckles, slamming his hips on mine with force. It is like he is doing it on purpose, like he enjoys watching me in bliss.
"I don't care. I don't care, just fuck me, fuck me, fuck me." I cry out, arching my back and rolling my hips against his.
"I am fucking you, princess. I am fucking your perfect, little, tight pussy. Listen to that... Can you hear how wet you are?" He asks me, his breathing getting caught in the back of his throat.
"Calum, please." I whimper, bringing my hand to the back of his head, pulling at his hair as he pounds me. My leg moves to his waist, hoisting on his hip from proximity, and trying to get more of him.
"Please what? What does my princess need?" He asks, pressing his forehead against mine. I can feel his lips brush against mine, his breath fanning on my skin.
"I need to cum... Please, let me cum." I whimper, trying to reach his lips. He coos at me, his hand moving down my thigh to grip on it for more force.
"My girl needs to cum around my cock... Mm, fuck. You need to cum around me, princess." He taunts me, slamming inside me with his all. I need to bite onto something or else I'll be heard by every single person within a mile radius.
"Oh fuck, that's a pretty neck you've got there... Pity if someone marked it." He leaves a peck on my bottom lip, before heading south to find my neck, digging his teeth into my skin.
"Calum!" I sing in pleasure, my hair standing straight on my skin.
"Cum inside me. Cum inside me, please." I beg, coming undone around him. There is a moment of brief, pure bliss, the only thing in my mind being how good this feels, how good we are together.
"Shit, princess. So close... I'm so close to filling you up." He groans, gripping down my hips to keep me from squirming.
"Cal, I can't... I whimper, jolting at every thrust. It is too much, the overstimulation nearly driving me towards insanity.
"Look how good you take my cock. Fuck, we'll just have to do this all day, everywhere in the house. Shit." He groans, gluing his hips on mine as he cums inside me.
I just focus on his face, flustered and tensed, just the prettiest sight I've ever seen.
He doesn't move an inch from me for as long as it takes him to catch his breath. I just touch his cheek softly, running my thumb over his warm skin in short circles.
"I am never going to get enough of you, am I?" He asks me, lowering his head to peck my forehead.
"I hope you don't." I reply, feeling a smile spreading on my lips.
"I don't want to move from here." He sighs, turning his head to kiss the palm of my hand which is still on his cheek.
"You'll have to, eventually."I chuckle and he hums in disagreement.
"I don't think so... The couch seems pretty comfortable." He replies, swiftly turning us so he is now on his back and I am laying on his chest. His hand traces down my ribs, softly and carefully making his way to the place I was shot, atop my abdomen.
"You've healed nicely." He comments in a whisper, his fingertips tracing the fading wound.
"I am trying to forget about the whole thing and having to see it in the mirror is not really helpful. So I am slathering it with healing cream all the time." I reply, leaving a peck on his chest. My eyes land on a small detail on his skin, something that looks like a new addition to his collection of tattoos.
"Is this one new?" I ask, passing my thumb over the little sunflower on his left pec.
"Relatively. I got it after the breakup. Since I couldn't have you in my life, I wanted a little something of you on me all the time." He replies, making me bring my gaze to meet his.
The sun is setting on us, the sunlight that washes the room from the big balcony window casting beautiful shadows on our bodies. Calum is breathing calmly, his chest moving at every breath he takes in, almost in sync with my breathing. He is still glistening with a little glaze of sweat on his skin, his body warm, pleasant against mine. I am falling for him, but who am I kidding? I never stopped falling for him, for a man I have no business falling with. He is dangerous, but also in danger, I know that firsthand at this point. But how dangerous the man holding me with so much love can be?
My Masterlist / My Ko-Fi
#calum hood#calum thomas hood#calum 5sos#calum hood imagine#calum hood smut#calum hood smut imagine#calum hood fic#calum hood smut fic#5 seconds of summer#5 seconds of summer smut#5 seconds of summer imagine#5 seconds of summer fic#5 seconds of summer smut imagine#5 seconds of summer smut fic#5sos#5sos imagine#5sos smut#5sos smut imagine#5sos smut fic#5sos fic#imagine#fic#smut#smut imagine#smut fic#wattpad#wattpad writer#ko-fi#ko-fi writer#request
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It's My (Halloween) Party
Halloween fluff (mostly) with a NSFW middle bit!
“It’s fine V, honestly, it’s fine. I knew that in the end this is what would have to happen and so did you. I’m ready, it’s fine.”
V looks Johnny in the eye, the usual smug look had been replaced with one more sombre and thoughtful.
“Shit Johnny, I’m so sorry, but don’t you think you’re over-reacting the tiniest bit? I mean, I’m literally going to be gone for three days, I promise I’ll spend the day with you on Friday.”
“But it’s Hallowe’en tomorrow V, I wanted to take it all in, dress up and shit, y’know?”
“I know, I do, but you can always decorate the apartment. Hey, why not have a party? Get dressed up, invite your friends, it’ll be fun.”
Johnny huffs non-committally, he does love a party, he might struggle with the friends part though. “I got a costume, see what you think?”
V nods and settles back on the couch and a few minutes later a subtly changed Johnny re-enters the room. V looks at his friend’s black suit, shirt and tie combo quizzically, “Who’re you supposed to be?”
“I’m an old-school assassin, like in that movie we saw where he killed that dude with a library book.”
“Shit yeah! That’s pretty good. If you put away the shit-eating grin and worked on harassed and homicidal you’d look just like him.” V laughs.
“Thank you for your valuable feedback.” Johnny spits before stalking back to the wardrobe.
-
Kerry is also in a wardrobe, albeit a much larger, more glamourous one. This Hallowe’en is going to be epic and he and V need outfits to match. There is already a pretty impressive pile of discarded clothes and exotic costumes, but nothing seems quite right.
V had tried helping at first, unearthing pirate costumes and elegant military gear from long-forgotten videos and declaring it all perfect, but hot as V looked in the sexy highwayman outfit, none of it was vibing with Kerry so the outfit was abandoned with the rest – only a little torn by its somewhat hasty removal. So, V is returning home in good spirits, oblivious to the increasingly frustrated mood of his husband.
“Hey Ker, you still upstairs?” V shouts.
A muffled, “M,hm,” comes from somewhere above him. Taking the steps two at a time and entering the closet, V tries not to smirk at the picture before him: world-famous Rockerboy Kerry Eurodyne sat in his underpants and a black feather boa pouting in a maelstrom of abandoned ideas.
V carefully picks his way over to the comically dejected looking man and sits behind wrapping his arms around his shoulders and grimaces through the pain of the coat hanger currently digging into his upper thigh. “It’s OK Ker, I’ll drive us into the City Center, buy lunch, look for costumes…”
Kerry cuts him off, “No! There’s something here, I can feel it, I just can’t find it.”
V pulls him closer burying his face in the older man’s neck, mostly to hide the chuckle. “Ditch this for a couple of hours, we can come back to it later, we need to pack for tomorrow’s trip.”
The other man looks momentarily startled, he’d been trying to forget about the record company shindig in NY he’d agreed to host, only finally agreeing because there’d be chooms there he hadn’t seen in a few years – and because of the preem Hallowe-en party of course. “Sure, I suppose,” he says, reluctantly letting the boa fall to the floor and allowing V to help him up, not that he needed help of course.
-
V flicks a note to Johnny when they’re on the way to the airport, Kerry sighing and rolling his eyes as he does so. “I just don’t want him to worry.” Explains the ex-merc.
“You don’t want him bugging you all day asking if you’ve set off yet ya mean.” Mutters the Rockerboy.
Johnny reads the message sullenly, last Hallowe’en was a wash out what with hospital stays (him), hissy fits (Kerry) and psychological evaluations by the bucketful (him and V), he wanted this one to count. Asking around various bars had given him a few leads to some preem parties, but none of them were quite what he was looking for, too controlled, not enough mayhem, maybe he wouldn’t bother after all, just throw himself into some work and forget about the whole thing. Fucking Kerry spoiling his fun again.
The Afterlife is buzzing, especially for a Tuesday morning which is often the quietest part of the week, prolly everyone wanting to conclude business before the evening shenanigans begin Johnny thinks curling his lip. He heads towards a couple of chooms in a corner booth and begins to talk biz.
-
Dragging the cases to the cab whilst Kerry expansively describes the hotel they’ll be staying in, V quickly pings off another message to Johnny, ‘En route to hotel, any plans yet?’ but no reply is immediately forthcoming so he takes his seat and looks out at the crumbling skyscrapers of New York that remind him so much of home.
Kerry’s voice brings him back to the moment, “Do you think we made the right choice?”
Baffled, V looks for clues in his husband’s face, does he mean in coming to NY, or picking this hotel, or getting a cat, or, well the list is pretty long of things they may regret one day. “Nope, you’ve lost me.”
“Of costumes ya gonk, what else could I be talking about?”
V lets out a breath and grins, “Course, everyone’s gonna be blown away.”
“Ya think? It’s not going to come across as a little, I dunno, low effort?”
V grips Kerry’s hand even tighter than he already is, “Babe, no one is gonna care about anything other than how fucking awesome we look, it’s not even worth thinking about.”
Sinking into his husband’s arms, Kerry smiles and looks up into the ex-merc’s eyes, “You’re one choice I’m never gonna regret,” he whispers huskily before planting a kiss on V’s bearded chin and snoozing for the rest of the ride.
-
Back in NC, Johnny is in the shower after a seemingly straightforward gig that turned unexpectedly messy. Picking the bits of Scav bone out of his matted hair is taking longer than he anticipated, he grunts with satisfaction as each one hits the floor of the shower.
Finally feeling reasonably presentable he searches the apartment for his jacket, he’s finally found the perfect party, he’s ditched the costume, he very much wants to look recognisable as himself when he walks in. “Fucking thing, where’s it gone?” he mutters to himself as he turns the room upside-down. Sitting on the bed and scanning the room, he frowns as he notices V’s battered old ‘Second Conflict’, jacket on the back of the chair, the October air is too cool to go jacketless, so “Fuck,” he sighs as he shrugs on the offending item and leaves into the Hallowe’en afternoon smog.
-
For the more formal, earlier part of the evening, Kerry has chosen a powder blue shot-silk evening suit and for V a matching one in teal, V is leaning heavily on the dressing table clinging onto the edge with one hand and gently stroking Kerry’s hair with the other as the Rockerboy expertly and enthusiastically sucks on his cock. “You look so hot in that suit Ker,” V purrs between gasps, “hope I didn’t hurt your knees pushing you down on the floor like that.”
Kerry pulls away from the object of his obsession for a moment, a string of drool and precum connecting them still, “You know I’d crawl over broken glass to get to your dick,” he smirks running his tongue up the underside and grinning as V shivers, “but I will get my own back ‘bout the crack about my knees later.” V chuckles, then gasps as his length disappears into Kerry’s warm, willing mouth.
“Five-minute call Mr. Eurodyne,” a runner calls through the door just as V groans and Kerry swallows, he licks his lips and kisses his husband deeply.
-
Johnny is on the street looking over at the warehouse where the party is to be held in a few hours’ time. He’s rolled up pretty early since he’s unfamiliar with this part of Watson and wants to make sure he makes a big entrance dead on time later. Satisfied that he has identified the main entrance and any exits he may need for whatever reason he retires to a nearby bar, orders a tequila and checks his messages.
Despite still being pretty pissed at V for disappearing over the holidays, he grins when he sees his message, “Heck yeah!!” he replies and settles in for a couple of hours while he waits for the party to begin.
-
V basks in the reflected glow from his husband as Kerry charmingly ad-libs his way through introductions and conversations, finishing with him disappearing in a puff of smoke whilst a spooky instrumental version of Dark Matter is played allowing him to grab V and rush back to the dressing room to get changed for the party proper.
“Still not sure about this Vince,” says Kerry pulling on and adjusting the wig he spent many hours choosing and having styled just right, “but it is spooky how much you look like him, got his mannerisms down and everything. Gives me the creeps if I’m honest.”
Looking in the mirror, V has to agree that the make-up artist, who is now working on Kerry, has done a preem job, unsettlingly so in fact. “It’s supposed to give you the creeps, it’s Hallowe’eeeeeen,” he replies in his best spooky voice. After a last critical look in the mirror V grabs his jacket and leans on the doorframe having a smoke waiting for Kerry to be ready. The make up guy does a couple of last adjustments and stands back whilst Kerry plays with his Kiroshis to get just the right eye color and stands to look in the full-length mirror.
He's almost mesmerised by what he sees there, “You’re a fucking genius Terry,” he tells the make-up guy, eyes never leaving the mirror.
V comes up behind him and slips his arms around his waist, “I honestly don’t know if it’s wrong to feel like this, but you look so fucking hot right now.”
Kerry turns in his arms and looks for V’s eyes, but finds only his own reflection in the lenses of his glasses, “V honey, it’s never wrong to tell me I look hot.”
-
People have started arriving to the party in Watson, Johnny nurses his drink and watches through the grimy window of the bar, waiting for the perfect time to make his entrance. He checks the pistol in his jacket, hefts his duffel bag onto his shoulder and makes his way over, avoiding being seen until he reaches the camera over the doorway to which he gives a one-fingered salute before heading inside.
It's maybe not what most people would call a party, mostly there are heavily chromed Maelstrommers hunched over laptops or having heavy conversations at tables, but as far as Johnny Silverhand is concerned anywhere where you can drink and have fun is a party, he’s already done the drinking part, now he’s ready for the fun.
He’d made it in and up the stairs without being spotted, clearly they’re all too busy to check the cameras, good. Standing just inside the doorway to the goon-filled open space beyond Johnny drops the bag pulling out V’s favourite SMG, Fenrir – perfect for these over-chromed gonks – and with something less flashy as a backup he kicks open the door, spraying bullets as he strides forwards.
Not being complete idiots, most of the gangers flee through the fire exit and disperse into the night, that’s fine, he’s not here to kill particularly, he’s here to collect. A couple of crumpled bodies impede his entrance slightly, but he grins as a metallic voice whines, “Shit, it’s Johnny Silverhand,” he makes his way towards the injured goon.
A couple of the guys don’t seem to have got the message, a well-placed bullet re-acquaints them with it, a couple more decide to try to be heroes, a casually hurled grenade finishes them off, finally it’s just Johnny and his quarry and a nervous woman who appears to be the girlfriend.
“You Taser?” the merc asks lighting a cigarette, well-aware of how this illuminates his scowling face.
“Leave him alone,” the woman shrieks coming at Johnny with impressively sharp steel nails unsheathed, “or I’ll fuck that pretty face right up.”
“Aw, she thinks I’m pretty,” Johnny says as he slows her down with a spray of bullets to the legs.
“Shit, dude!” screams Taser covering his head with his arms and smearing the blood dripping from his chest over his face.
Johnny looks into a face that is mostly polished chrome with two red pin-pricks that he guesses must be eyes. “Brick says you owe him, and you owe him big. He wants his Eddies.”
Taser gulps, “But…” Johnny’s pistol presses uncomfortably into his abdomen, “Shit, fine,” his eyes glow violet for a moment, “it’s done, tell him it’s fucking done.”
“We thank you for your co-operation,” Johnny offers as he leaves.
-
Over in New York, the party is also in full swing, the media swarm around the red-carpeted entrance to the ballroom cooing over the guest’s costumes and analysing their choices. The short journey from their room to the party is a tense one for Kerry, still unsure if anyone will even get their costumes, never mind dig them. Hand in hand, he and V leave the elevator and turn the corner onto the carpet, dozens of heads turn, they’d been waiting for his arrival, not only is he a huge star, but his costume never disappoints. He wasn’t sure what he expected, but the gasps, laughs and applause are not unwelcome.
For the occasion, V has replaced his synth-skin chrome arm for an older, silver model, red shades and a dark, shoulder-length wig add to the look, but it’s the ‘borrowed’ clothes – leather trousers, Samurai tank and the iconic jacket – and immaculate mannerisms that really make the resemblance extraordinary.
Kerry had spent ages getting the bandana just so around his thick, curly dark hair. Terry had done an amazing job with the facial hair and tattoos and somehow made him look thirty all over again. The moment of inspiration had come as he put the pile of clothes back into the closet the previous day, his old leather vest had slipped from its hanger as he shuffled past with his armful of rejected outfits and on picking it up something akin to a lighting bolt hit him, Kerry Eurodyne and Johnny Silverhand finally together again after fifty years.
The crowd lapped it up, especially when they stop for a very wet, passionate and long kiss, tomorrow’s screamsheet headlines are just writing themselves.
-
Having collected his payment for a job well done, Johnny makes his way through town, stopping briefly to change before making his way to the Afterlife and the private party he was about to crash. The feeds on the street caught his eye, he stands clenching has cigarette between thin lips as he watches the footage beamed from New York, he was definitely going to have to have a very serious word with V later.
-
The party was awesome, Kerry had kept his crown as the King of Hallowe’en and V was having a lot of fun channelling Johnny again for one night. Back in their room, the Rockerboy throws himself onto the bed chatting animatedly about how awesome the evening was while V sits beside him, smiling at how happy they both are and remembering how lucky he is.
“Y’know,” says V resting his hand on his husband’s chest, “Rock God Kerry is my guy, but this version is still doing it for me.” Kerry scowls at first, but is soon smiling again as V’s hand slides down his torso and into his jeans, “Keep the costume on for a while huh?” he asks, running his tongue around a pert nipple.
Kerry closes his eyes and moans softly, but then opens them and pulls himself up into a seated position, evicting a confused V from his chest, “You’re gonna have to get changed, the thought of Johnny anywhere near my cock is putting me off,” he growls.
V snickers, Johnny would love to know he was cock-blocking him from the other side of the country, “Course Ker, gimme a minute.” The ‘borrowed’ clothes drop to the floor, the shades and wig come off and the make-up is wiped away, a few minutes later a fresh-faced V comes back to four angry messages from Johnny and a gently snoring husband, it’s OK he decides curling up next to his man, it can all wait til morning.
#cyberpunk 2077#kerry eurodyne#kerry eurodyne x male v#kerry x male v#cyberpunk kerry#v cyberpunk#kerry is my muse#cyberpunk v#kerry x v#johnny silverhand#halloween
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Hiii it's me again! Idk if you do like modern au but if not then that's fine!
My request is Xiao/Cyno being inlove with s/o from the first time they met.
But, s/o doesn't like them and just wanted to be friends with them. I was wondering if you could do s/o reaction to the boys when they confess their feelings but s/o was dying .
Sorry if it's confusing-
Hello! Thanks for the request! I hope you like it, I wasn't exactly sure how I wanted to have this be since it's supposed to be modern. However, I took it as a challenge! Sadly I don't have a good title for this ;w;
➺ Character: Cyno
➺ Genre: Angst
➺ Warning(s): Character death!
Cyno was a man of few words and relationships. He usually kept to himself and didn’t really branch out much. You’d met him at work and he seemed to be a pretty… interesting individual. He was oddly straightforward, had little facial expressions or emotions… but loved telling jokes. Terrible jokes. He also seemed to take things literally and sometimes things tended to go over his head. But you enjoyed his presence nonetheless.
Cyno, on the other hand, was already madly in love with you from the moment he laid his eyes on you. You were sweet and kind and caring. You always laughed at his jokes, you were always the first to help him with anything he messed up on at work, and you never judged him. You enjoyed the silence he often provided and you learned everything about him. Of course the man would fall in love with you.
What he didn’t know was that you were sick and it was only getting worse. You didn’t air out your issues because you didn’t want people to treat you any differently. You didn’t want that baby type of treatment where the second you were too tired, people were forcing you to bed or something. So… you kept your illness to yourself and only a few close family members. That also meant Cyno would never find out. But you didn’t want him to know. He was so… happy and he never tended to worry about anything and this wasn’t something you wanted to add to his already full plate with work and school.
But then came the dreaded day you had been waiting for. You’d visited the doctor for your weekly checkup and you’d heard the one line you didn’t want to.
“I’m sorry, (y/n), but there’s nothing we can do beyond this point. We only estimate another week or so but this is so sensitive we can’t be sure. Could be more, could be less so… it’s best you stay here in case something worsens.” After that, you stopped listening. Giving the man a smile, you only nodded.
“Ok… thank you, doctor.” He could tell you were upset and stood up to help you lay down.
“We’ll alert all immediate family members, if you’d like.” With your permission, they contacted your family but upon your request… they also called Cyno. He rushed to the hospital, emotions in shambles, and panic written on his usually neutral face.
“(y/n)!” He yelled as he threw the door open, eyes wide with fear. “Wh-what happened?!” He ran to your side and immediately grabbed your hand.
“It’s ok, Cyno…” once you’d gotten him to calm down a little, you proceeded to explain that you were sick. Of course, the main question was why you didn’t tell him.
“I’m sorry… I wanted to spare you the stress. I knew it wasn’t going to get better so… I didn’t want you to worry. What I didn’t realize… was this was too late. I should’ve told you earlier… we could’ve…” you paused, not knowing how to finish your sentence. When you looked at Cyno, your eyes widened. He was… crying. Tears were pooling in his eyes, slowly cascading down his warm cheeks.
“Don’t leave me.” He said as he leaned in, laying his head on your shoulder. You wrapped your arms around him, hugging him as you felt him begin to break down.
“I’m… not gonna be too far, you know. I can’t leave you alone. Who else would you tell your jokes to?” You said, making him look at you. You almost winced at the raw emotion in his crimson eyes. Sadness and loneliness were the strongest. Reaching up, you slid your hand under his eyes, drying his tears but it was in vain. He started to cry again.
“I love you…” he said as he grabbed your hand and touched his cheek. “I love you so much, I-I don’t want you to leave.”
“I…” you didn’t know how to tell him you didn’t feel the same, but from the way Cyno looked at you… he could probably tell.
“It’s ok… I just wanted you to know. You don’t have to say anything. It’s ok.” That was his way of sparing you the pain of rejecting him. You only gave him a weak smile as you leaned your head back on the small pillow. You were tired… so tired. You could hear other voices in the back- mainly your family returning for the umpteenth time but… everything seemed so far away.
Cyno called your name a few times but after a moment, your hand that touched his cheek limply fell. He raced to grab it, bringing it back to his face but pausing. You… wouldn’t want to do that. Slowly, he lowered your hand, his head lowering with it. You were gone.
#genshin impact x reader#genshin x reader#genshin cyno x reader#cyno x reader#genshin cyno#🖊─ pocky’s writings#genshin angst#angst
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this post is literally for me and like 5 dutch girlies only but i hate viaplay with soooo much of my body and i've been praying for their downfall daily and...
it's been working.
okay context for anyone who cares: ziggo used to own the rights to f1 in the NL. they didn't do a 10/10 job, but they were fun. the interviews are iconic, drivers just liked them, hell i still see clips/gifs with that bright orange ziggo mic every day. sure, jack asked questions that weren't always fitting and may have made drivers uncomfortable from time to time - my biggest annoyance w him - and olav wasn't flawless in his commentary. but they understood the most important thing in the content they made:
f1 is supposed to be entertaining.
i've said before - but that's a whole other post - that stefano domenicali should take this sport more seriously as a sport and that reporters should take it less seriously and see it as entertainment.
ziggo understood that. with formula one cafe before and after each race to talk with fellow dudes about the race: they knew people wanted to be entertained and they did that. there was beer on the table, champagne when max won the championship, they had a special dude to show everyone memes about f1, they had guys that truly understood f1 (former drivers like robert doornbos, giedo van de garde, tom and unfortunately tim coronel and some other dudes who came too rarely for me to remember names) or other types of motorsport (hello jeffrey herlings!) but mostly: they had fun. robert doornbos, guy w great sense of humour but also a big ego lmao, took the piss on host rob kampues who also took the piss on robert doornbos. they just didn't take everything too seriously: they provided entertainment.
now viaplay.
in comes viaplay, start of 2022 season. prices were €10 per month at the time. viaplay was new to everyone: it didn't exist in the NL prior to this. they, aside from f1, also barely had anything on their platform. bit by bit came shows, but, like, nothing too spectacular.
viaplay started off wrong on all accounts. where ziggo f1 cafe was a place with one long table where people sat, beer on the table, a bar in the background and a few people sitting all around (left photo), viaplay's studio looked horribly cold. bright bright lights (a hospital has a more cozy vibe) and the hosts were standing (right photo).
they also got the most humourless people. i mentioned giedo before and, sorry my guy, i've never caught you making a joke before. and christijan alberts - also former f1 driver - is soooo full of himself and also doesn't have a sense of humor. so anyway. i very quickly decided to only use viaplay for the race and turn it on not sooner than the formation lap and not later than 'we're going back to the studio' was even fully said.
eventually, they did move to a table where they sat at but the vibes were still all off. a fridge is warmer. a freezer is warmer. (before anyone comes at me: i like amber ok. she's doing her best. she's been given absolutely shit context to work in. she really rises to the occasion when she's with literally anyone else. that video with max and jos and mika and whatever? she was spicy there. so good. but noooo they but self-centered mansplainer christijan and can't make a joke giedo and ego too big for the room tim coronel next to her. can't expect someone to work when they've got broken tools ok).
they hire commentators who keep literally sucking max's dick in their commentaries. he cannot do anything wrong in their eyes. if he does they blame it on something else. look. olav wasn't objective, but he was just a man with a hobby who got a platform. christijan alberts who literally criticised ziggo for being too subjective about max is literally sitting at that desk in viaplay watching two guys with HORRIBLE voices* talk overly loving about max even when the guy just does his thing. hilarious.
*how! and i really emphasize how!!!! can you hire people with horrible voices when their PRIMARY TASK is to be listened to. why did no one think, huh. these guys are not pleasant to listen to. maybe we should NOT put them in the commentary box.
god i've never in the past year and a half seen, like, a clip from a viaplay interview bc the question was funny or the interviewer joked around. the drivers are funny on their own but when nothing sparks them we'll get the same answer in seven different interviews in the media pen that no one wants. let alone the drivers.
but those are things, like, sure. whatever.
then they added a sponsorship: i think a sports betting place. 'this broadcast was sponsored by' or whatever. i do not pay €10 per month to watch ads. i pay it to be ad free. it's the basis of a subscription.
why would they need ads, you ask?
well viaplay has terrible priorities. as seen before, but they chose one even worse priority.
they sponsor max, prominently.
that decision alone is fine! right. no issues there. but not when you can't really afford it. not at the expense of your subscribers. not when i would personally fund max's sponsorship. i'll buy merch ok! fuck off!
BUT NOW COMES THE FUN PART.
viaplay has been steadily losing subscribers! we love to hear it!
in 2022 they made a €60 million profit. in 2023 they're losing €570 million euros. losing. five hundred and seventy. million. they're firing a quarter of their employees.
gee! i wonder what choices you could make to better prioritise this and to keep bringing quality content you aim for and ---
they decide to rise their subscription prices.
€16 per month. that's a 60% raise (right?). bro.
and! they're cutting off all the other series they had on viaplay and now primarily focus on sport. they're closing their Polish, Canadian US and UK departments (you're not missing anything).
rumours had spread that maybe they'd need to sell the rights to f1 for 2024 but unfortunately they said that wasn't necessary. rn they still have 7 million subscribers. why are you people still subscribed. f1tv is cheaper and even there you can listen to the horrible voices of those two commentators who's names i never bothered to remember.
simplest thing for them would be to stop sponsoring max lmao. but they'll lose literally all relevance then so i doubt they ever will. cancelling and moving onto f1tv was the best decision i ever made. praying for their downfall too. can't wait to see my besties rob kamphues and certified cheater (but at least he's got a sense of humour!) robert doornbos talking about the race and jack plooij joking around with the dudes and olav mol being interrupted in his monologue because max decided to be a little shit again. they were passionate about the sport. everything they did lived and breathed the whole if-you-like-your-work-you'll-never-work-a-day-in-your-life thing. they had fun! jack plooij is a literal dentist who just likes f1 so he somehow rolled into the pit reporter job. rob kamphues is a comedian. they all had their love for f1 in common and were just fanboying on live television and that was fun.
i just miss ziggo man.
#zhalia's lil' chit chat#i'm passionate about viaplays downfall ok#f1 just isn't the same without ziggo.#viaplay#anti viaplay RAGE post
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Word for the week: therapy, city, fire, knee
Therapy - A Treatment Room Doors Moment Extended Cut (basically before I decided that ATRDM would work best only in Roy POV I had some other scenes plotted out and so going to post them as a seperate thing)
“I just, I just want them to like me again you know,” Jamie sighs thumping down onto the seat across from Keeley. She sighed, carrying on typing on her laptop. She had hoped that Jamie seeming more emotionally mature and just being her friend not her boyfriend now would mean that she didn’t have to do this anymore. Jamie was sweet, it was what had drawn her to him in the first place, but his emotional regulation and maturity were rock bottom on the scale. As his girlfriend she expected to have to do some of the emotional legwork for him but as his friend, god she was so tired of it. She sent the email she had been working on a pushed her laptop shut. Good job they literally had someone who’s job it was to listen to Jamie whine.
“Come on Jamie,” she sighed, getting to her feet and waving for him to follow her.
“Oh ok. We can walk and talk,” Jamie shrugged and continued to make his point about how he just wanted people to notice he was trying to change. Keeley sighed again. She really didn’t have time for this. They climbed up the stairs and Keeley pushed the partially open door to Dr Sharon’s office.
“Jamie, this is Dr. Fieldstone. She's a brilliant therapist and, unlike me, she actually gets paid to listen to you complain,” Keeley gestured to Sharon with a tense smile.
“Oh, right. Um, sorry doc but I already go to therapy like,” Jamie stammered looking between Dr Sharon and Keeley looking like a kicked puppy.
“Really?” Keeley squeaked before her brain caught up. She thought this was going to be a fight to get Jamie to see someone to talk to … not that he already had.
“Yeah, she’s called Lucy and she’s ace. We chat on the phone now I ain’t in Manchester,” Jamie shrugs as if this was no big deal. “No offence doc. Just don’t really need two do I?” Jamie smiles awkwardly to Sharon.
City - from God Forbid You Leave Me (like everybody else did)
“This is a genuine question Jamie,” Higgins sighed, pulling over a far too small stool to perch by Jamie’s bed. He reached out to lay his hand on the top of the duvet that was covering the entirety of Jamie’s balled up form. “So I don’t want you to get mad,” Higgins added. Hearing no complaints from inside Jamie’s cocoon he decided to press on. “Do you actually want to go back to City or does that just feel like what everyone is expecting you to do?”
“I gotta,” the mound mumbled.
“Do you?” Higgins asked, starting to move his hand on top of the duvet trying to provide some comfort to the distressed young man. There was a pause, the feeling of the duvet rising and falling the only sign that there was something alive in there.
Fire - From Roll Call Ch3
“I’ve booked out basically a whole Travelodge for anyone that isn’t admitted and we are going to get to you as soon as it is safe to do so. Anything else I can do to help Colin?” Higgins asked and Colin huffed a laugh.
“It’s all on fire Higgins. It’s all on fire. Everyone is so hurt and I’m not so I’ve got to help and I’ve only found two players so far, fat load of good I’m doing,” Colin mumbled, his breath catching in his throat after every word.
“You are doing a wonderful job Colin,” Sam’s voice startles Colin. His head shoots up and he nearly drops the borrowed phone to the ground, only catching it with the tips of his fingers at the last second.
Knee - from The Richmond Job Ch14
“Roy, your knee!” Keeley hissed, pulling Roy into the stairwell before the real guard rounded the corner. “You are supposed to be in bed. God, you should be in hospital not just bed,” she rambled, holding his by the shoulders and checking he somehow hadn’t got more injured on the walk here.
“I have been in bed long enough and no fucking hospitals you know that. You’re not supposed to be here either,” Roy growled, peering through the glass of the stairwell door to make sure they weren’t seen.
“Well, it’s Rupert isn’t it. And Nate. They can’t win, we’ve got to complete the job,” Keeley sighed, tears welling up in her eyes.
“We?” Roy questioned and she rolled her eyes with an exaggerated exhale.
“I mean we’re both here. There’s no way the others aren’t as well. Casing the joint,” she smiled tearily.
#train thoughts#candle writes#word game wednesday#atrdm ec tag#gflym tag#leverage au#roll call tag#jamie tartt#keeley jones#roy kent#sam obisanya#colin hughes#leslie higgins
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TBOSAS on Crack short take (32)
Lepidus: Hello, Panem! Welcome back to our show, The Table Talk. I’m your host, Lepidus Malmsey for Capitol News-
Casca: Start the show already!
Lepidus: Fine! For this season’s ✨Stars of The Week✨, we have invited our beloved Mentors from The Academy to sit down and chat with us!
Mentors: Hello, everyone.😔
Festus: *Quickly stands up* Can I switch seats with Pup? Arachne is giving me a lot of “evil vibes” today.😬
Arachne: *Is still wearing a neck brace after the Sandwich Zoo Incident* Oh, don’t act so f*ckin’ innocent, Creed. You tried to kill me in front of my Tribute 2 days ago!
Festus: Kill you?! I literally saved you from being stabbed and choked to death by your Tribute, you ungrateful spider!
Arachne: Oh, yeah! You freaking shoved me first, garbage boy!
Festus: You punched my beautiful face and gave me a black eye, you spoiled witch!
Arachne: Pay my hospital bills first, you trash loser!
Festus: Pay mine, you monster!
Casca: At least smile and look happy while arguing!
Festus: I’m doing my best!
Lepidus: Can we go back to-
Casca: Dammit it, Creed! Sit the f*ck down!
Festus: Fine!
Arachne: Suck a di-
Felix: Alright! That’s enough! Let’s go back to you, Mr. Malmsey.
Lepidus: Finally! My first question is for anyone and everyone.
Felix: Ok. Let’s hear it.
Lepidus: So what were your first thoughts and reactions when you first found out that you got selected for the Mentorship Program?
Livia: Unsurprised as always.
Juno: As expected for a Phipps.
Florus: My parents almost smiled at me. Almost.
Felix: My granduncle created another useless national holiday to celebrate my success.
Coryo: My cousin baked me a cake made out of cabbages.
Sejanus: My father threw money at me like confetti.
Festus: To be honest, I wasn’t even aware of the program. I just got in, and here we are.
Androcles: Just like we planned!
Lepidus: What do you mean by that?
Pup: What do you mean by what?
Lepidus: Weren’t you all selected because you guys are simply the best and the brightest of your year?
Hilarius: Fairly selected?!
Livia: I’m so sorry but I never heard of her before.
Domitia: The Best and the brightest?! Who told you that lie?
Persephone: You’re joking right?! I mean, just look at us!
Festus: Me?! The Academy’s village idiot?!🤣
Florus: Half of my grades are sh*t!
Pup: Sleeping and skipping classes are my best subjects!
Palmyra: Who told you I was smart?
Apollo: I’m not even the best at finger painting class.
Dennis: Do people honestly believe that BS?
Androcles: Now that’s funny!
Lysistrata: I have at least 15 demerits to my name, you know.
Coryo: Physical Education hates me! And delusional Dean Highbottom hates me!
Sejanus: Dr. Gaul personally banned me from attending her class. And my grades are also sh*t.
Gaius: Don’t look at me. I’m just the class clown, bro.
Diana: And honestly, Clemensia’s the only student who deserves to be here fair and square. But as for the rest, let’s just say, we used other means.😈
Lepidus: What other means?!
Felix: Mr. Malmsey, not to be rude, but I have to know, who told these lies to you?
Lepidus: Your Dean told me-
Casca: I swear it wasn’t me!
Lepidus: Right. So just for the record, you’re all confessing, just now, on LIVE TV, and in front of me, that not one of you is a top performing student at The Academy?!
Felix: Unfortunately, yes.
Festus: Never was and never will be.
Lepidus: So you all have demerits?
Festus: My demerit count is 92 and counting!😀
Lysistrata: Shut it, Creed! You’re not suppose to say that on TV.
Felix: Yeah! What will the rest of Panem think of us now?!
Festus: Panem is thinking about us?
Coryo: Since when?
Lepidus: But seriously, how the heck did all of you become our official mentors then?
Felix: Ravinstill Nepotism!
Androcles: My mama blackmailed my way into that list, sweetheart!
Coryo: Easy. I just pretended to be Dean Highbottom’s dead boyfriend and persuaded him to add me on that list while he was drunk.
Casca: Crassus, my love, why did you betray me again?! I was super drunk!😭
Sejanus: Just ask my father. His money don’t jiggle jiggle. It folds.
Lysistrata: I just gave our Dean a free but fake morphling prescription.
Casca: That was fake?!
Livia: My mama threatened Highbottom with a fake tax evasion allegation.
Juno: I’m literally ✨Old Money Capitol Royalty✨.
Palmyra: Food poisoning.
Lepidus: Can you elaborate on that?
Palmyra: No.
Florus: Simple. The Ring twins and I just asked Urban and Io to hack the Dean’s personal computer and change the final list of Mentors before the day of the announcement.
Io: It was dangerous.
Diana: But it was worth it.
Urban: True. And to be fair, I was already on that list.
Apollo: Whatever you say, Math Freak.
Pup: My father just used his military connections while I was busy sleeping.
Persephone: My papa threatened to eat the Dean.
Dennis: I just convinced one of my professors to let me in.
Lepidus: How?!
Dennis: Do you want to receive a horse head before going to bed?
Lepidus: No.
Gaius: I just told another “your mama” jokes to one of the School Board Officials.
Lepidus: That’s it?
Gaius: Yeah. What more can you ask?
Domitia: My papa gave Dr. Gaul 200 chickens and 20 dairy cows.
Arachne: My mama promised the Dean and the whole faculty members a free vacation getaway this summer.
Iphigenia: I kid you not, my crazy papa threatened to destroy the food industry if I didn’t get in.
Vipsania: Clearly, I just got in because my aunt (Professor Sickle) threatened to throw the Dean out of a window if I wasn’t on the list.
Festus: Honestly, I just strolled into Heavensbee Hall, crashed the ceremony uninvited, sat down on one of those fancy “Mentors only” seats, and everybody just accepted it.
Lepidus: So you just illegally got in through sheer dumb luck?
Festus: Well, the odds are always in my favor, Leppy.
Clemensia: *sighs* So it’s true. I’m the only student who got in by literally doing my best.
Coryo: Yup. That’s right, Clemmie!
Clemensia: Why am I even here? Just to suffer?!😩
Sejanus: How about you, Heavensbee?
Hilarius: I just blackmailed my creepy father to let me in, or else I’ll stop giving him some of my cute and candid photos of Coryo and Felix.
Coryo: What the f*ck, Hilari!
Felix: How the heck did you take my photos without me knowing?!
Coryo: And why give them to your creepy old man?!
Hilarius: None of your business.
Coryo: Hilari, I swear I will literally file a restraining order against your whole family if you keep giving away my cute photos like candy.
Felix: My granduncle will hear about this!😡🔪
Hilarius: Why are you being mean to me?! It’s not my fault you two were born gorgeous!😭
Sejanus: Can I see those cute photos of Coryo?🥺
Lysistrata: Can I sell those photos?
Casca: Can I have one?
Lepidus: What is wrong with all of you?!
#tbosas#bosas#crack post#coriolanus snow#coryo snow#president snow#hunger games#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#ballad of songbirds and snakes#lucy gray baird#the hunger games#suzanne collins#crack ship#corjanus#snowplinth#sejanus plinth#festus creed#lysistrata vickers#thg#thg fanfiction#thg series#thg fic#felix ravinstill#dean highbottom#casca highbottom#clemensia dovecote#thg fandom#thg incorrect quotes#tbosas incorrect quotes#coriolanus x sejanus
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well Pip’s tooth cracked while we were playing tug-of-war last night and half of it fell out—it’s not like the bottom chipped off it’s like it cracked vertically and half of it is just gone?? the other half is presumably still in there but he won’t let me look at it? he bled all over his rope toy but seemed totally unfazed and was mostly annoyed that tug had to end. they can’t get him in until thursday and I’m sure it’s going to be like $1k+ to extract it so there goes any hope of putting money away for the next few months 🫠 I literally JUST got done paying off the clinic bills and still have $1200 left in hospital debt 🫠🫠🫠 so the financial stuff is stressful but also I cried a bit because idk any time he has to go to the vet I’m forced to confront the fact that he’s seven now he’s getting older and it’s VITAL that he live forever with zero health issues OKAY 😭😭
then I woke up today to discover the old sealed-off fireplace has become uhh less sealed and is leaking a lot of water into the house. it missed dripping on my airpods case all night by about two inches but it did ruin a book and drench a box of ukrainian chocolates my work bff gave me 😩 anyway blahhh not a great 24 hours and also my hockey team sucked last night. plus I might have to stay home from work today to meet the repair guy which would normally be no big deal but is pretty inconvenient today as we have an external consultant coming to lead a strategic planning session + I’m supposed to get lunch in town with my work bff + I’m supposed to do a tour and a volunteer shift at this food bank way over on the other side of town. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa gah ok it’s fine I’m going to aggressively snuggle Pip and cry some more. I also had weird dreams all night including one where I woke up from a coma with amnesia and discovered that before the coma I’d apparently quit my current dream job to take a high-paying finance job and I couldn’t get my old job back and I wept and wept because now I was trapped forever in finance hell. so I guess that was my subconscious telling me I’d rather be stressed about money than working a job I hate? sigh. agh I don’t feel great I wish I could skip ahead a bit and be living a different day!!!!
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Ahem... Angst me mommy! I remember because last I sent a request of angst you said we were supposed to say that. Anyways can you do modern scenario Agni x reader with absolutely soul crushing? So basically I want the reader to get hit by car literally and be in the hospital when Agni arrives there BUT I want it to have fluffy ending. I got hit by a car once I always laugh about it but people say I'm morbid XDDD
looool you don't HAVE to say that haha!! it's just a joke ;)
... but thank you tho! I'm sorry you had to go through that, dang :c I'm glad dark humor could help you tho, sometimes it helps! and I really hope you're doing ok nowadays <3
You really should have seen the car coming, shouldn’t you?
Except, well, you were doing everything you were supposed to be doing. It was the driver who wasn’t following all the rules, so you think perhaps the universe (and your boyfriend) can forgive you for getting hit by a fucking car. You hope so, anyway.
You’re on a few painkillers right now, so you blame that for the fact that the incredibly stupid pun of, Surely an accident isn’t bad car-ma, is it?? floats through your mind. Ugh, you’ll have to cringe at yourself later.
The good part is that the painkillers, whatever sort of cocktail they have you on, are doing their job ― you’re not feeling much pain. Thank God. You’re just sore of vaguely aware that your body feels like a single huge bruise, and you’re tired.
As soon as AGNI comes into the room, your brain is trying to snap to attention. There he is, there’s the person you love. He looks so… concerned? You’ll have to apologize to him as soon as you can form a coherent sentence.
“Aah, jaan, what happened?” he murmurs, coming to sit next to the bed. Almost immediately his hand comes up to gently cup your cheek. “W… well, I know what happened… sort of… oh, my God, (Name).” He shakes his head. “How do you feel?”
“I’m okay. Kinda tired… my brain is all shaky… like I can’t… it’s fuzzy, you know?” You’re not sure how else to describe it. Still, you let your eyes close for a second as you feel so comforted by his hand on your face. Whatever else might be true at any one time, Agni makes you feel safe. As long as he’s here, everything’s going to be okay. “When will they let me go, love? I want you to take me home.”
You might be whining a little bit. You think you’re pretty justified, though. More justified than you are on most other days, at least.
He shakes his head. “They want to keep you overnight, just to make sure there aren’t any problems they’ve missed. You’re very lucky, do you know that? This could have been a lot worse. I’m so glad you’re okay.”
“I’m sorry I worried you.” You reach up to slip your hand over his, taking a breath. You’re pretty sure you have a broken rib or two… it kind of hurts to breathe. The painkillers can’t fix everything, you suppose. “You’re still going to take me home, aren’t you?”
A soft laugh meets your ears, and he presses a light kiss against your forehead. “What are you talking about? Of course I will. As soon as the doctors tell me I’m allowed to take you home, we’ll go home.”
You nod, giving the conversation an air of finality. (… At least, in your mind.) “Okay, good. I can’t wait to go home. Will you stay with me tonight, though?”
“Where else would I go?” You can hear the smile in his voice even while you recline back to try and rest. “I’ll text Soma that I won’t be home tonight. Although… he’ll probably come right over when I tell him what’s going on. Is that okay?”
“Mhm. That’s fine. Tell him not to flirt with all the nurses; they might take away my pain medicine if he’s too annoying.”
Agni laughs again. “They wouldn’t. But I’ll tell him to keep that to a minimum. Do your best to relax for now, alright, jaan?” Before he moves to take his phone out, he runs a hand through your hair. “Don’t worry. Once we get you home, I’ll take good care of you.”
#car accident tw#Black Butler#Kuroshitsuji#Agni#reader insert#romantic#drama#hurt/comfort#aaaaaa pls he's such a good boy ;w;#one hell of a queue
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Asher/Baabe pregnancy headcanons I think I might turn this into a series??? Idk yet (This isn’t proof read so sorry if something is spelled wrong also, it’s kinda short bc I wrote it during my econ class lol)
Cw: pregnancy, pregnancy symptoms
Ok so they only found out because Baabe started waking up with morning sickness
Asher would find them practically hugging the toilet
“Baabe, are you ok? I know my cooking wasn’t good yesterday but was it really that bad? Did I give you food poisoning??”
But when the symptoms continued they went to the doctor only to find out Baabe was pregnant
Asher was beyond excited like literally bouncing off the walls and he wouldn’t shut up about it
“Do you think it’ll be a boy or a girl? What are we gonna name them? We need to set up the nursery. What color should we paint it?”
When Baabe was in the emotional stage and started crying for no reason, Ash would start crying too to the point where Baabe would end up comfort him
“Ash it’s ok, stop crying, I’m fine” “I know but now I can’t stop crying”
Asks Davey to teach him how to cook just so he can cook for Baabe in case they’re craving something
So many cuddles
Like he gets even clingier
Baabe uses them being pregnant as an excuse for everything
“Ash, I don’t wanna watch this show can you change it?” “But Baabe the episode just came out I’ve been waiting for this” *Baabe points to their stomach* “Fine” and then he changes it
He’s really excited up until he realizes that he doesn’t know how to change a diaper or even properly know how to hold a baby
He buys so many parenting books
When Baabe starts going into labor Ash is more freaked out then they are
Like you know that one scene from the office that’s like “omg ok it’s happening, everybody stay calm, everybody stay fucking calm” yeah that’s Ash
Ash cried when the baby was born, he sat on the hospital bed holding Baabe with one arm and the baby with another
Stoppp omg that made me soft
Ok but when the baby is born they become partners in crime
The baby is literally a mini Ash bc 1. They look a like 2.once the baby learns how to crawl he will not stay still
I can imagine it being the middle of the night and Asher wasn’t in bed so Baabe went to go look for him and then finds him on the couch with the baby watching Pokémon
“Ash he was supposed to be asleep three hours ago”
And when the baby is a toddler Baabe finds Ash trying to teach him how to play Halo
“Really Ash?” “He saw me playing and then he wanted to play too, how was I supposed to say no?”
Ash has full conversations about Pokémon with the baby when he learns how to talk
Speaking of Pokémon, for Halloween Ash dresses up as Ash Ketchum and dresses the baby up as Pikachu
Later that night when the baby was put to sleep, Baabe and Ash were cuddling in bed he was like
“Baabe I want another one” “Another what?” “Another baby”
And then right be he falls asleep he adds
“We could dress him up as Raichu”
#redacted#redacted asmr#redacted asmr headcanons#redacted asher#redacted ash#redacted babe#asher x babe
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supernatural s11e17 red meat (w. robert berens, andrew dabb)
have a vague idea this episode is gonna be difficult to watch, didn't have the emotional fortitude to watch it last night
well, sam getting shot in the cold open sure would do it.
DEAN
All right, well, we make a call and we put somebody on it.
SAM
Yeah, but... [He sighs, closes his laptop and looks at Dean]. We'll get him back.
DEAN
How?
SAM
I... I don't know. But we'll figure it out.
i feel like an asshole but i'm like, are we talking about cas? dunno what other dude he'd be distraught over. maybe it's my total lack of emotional connection with the character but i'm just very ???? literally whatever i'm expecting they're feeling about him, i'm always wrong. broken record on that.
s11e17 / s8e23
reminded of that little smile dean gave sam when he was wrapping his hand in the church. and it reminds me of being with my mom when she was dying in the hospital. we're gonna smile and be so positive and softer than we normally would, but also try to keep it light. (i'm not sure i have the emotional fortitude for this tonight either)
not quite sure i'll ever have it to watch sam die like this. this is awful. trying to talk myself into just finishing so i don't end up crying for an extended period of time today and another day.
BILLIE
It's cute, though. You pretending you're trying to save Sam for the greater good, when we both know you're doing it for you. You can't lose him.
just saw this line in an edit recently and thought it was attributed to Death, no wonder i didn't remember it.
DEAN
I'm asking you... I'm begging you, please. Bring him back. Bring him back and take me instead.
BILLIE
I'm not here to bargain with you, kid. I'm here to reap you. And the kicker is... Sam's not dead.
here's where i'm never happy with anything. despite the unhinged love and commitment of it all, this all is really veering into emotional torture porn for me. how can we make it the worst. and then a little worse on top of that. except instead of making me irritated, i'm just more sad and want it to be over. maybe this is one i won't be able to appreciate until i have some distance.
DEAN
Michelle, this is gonna be very hard. But you will be okay. And, eventually... eventually you'll get back to normal.
MICHELLE
No, I won't. They said I could leave an hour ago. But... where am I even supposed to go? After everything we survived together... I watched the man I love die. There's no normal after that.
not sure what this pointed zoom into dean making the sad puppy face is about. we know he can't be normal when sam dies, he knows it too?? does he remember that year with lisa and ben? and now he has the threat of not only losing sam, that sam won't be waiting for him in heaven or anywhere else if he does die.
well, fortunately we have the production draft of the script linked in the wiki for this one so actually can get answer
so i mean.. ok. both watched their husbands die is what we're saying
DEAN
So, that's it, huh? Two quarts O-neg, and you're good to go.
i thought we were treating abdominal gunshot wounds like the serious emergency they are but i guess not
SAM
Hey, so, what did you do? When you thought I was dead? What did you do?
DEAN
Thought about redecorating your room [Sam chuckles], you know, putting in a Jacuzzi, a nice disco ball... really class up the joint.
SAM
Right, seriously.
DEAN
What, I, uh... I knew you weren't dead.
SAM
Right.
DEAN
I knew.
so i mean. sam not buying that, clearly. wonder if dean ever tells him
should remember to check for a script next time i have wonderings about what they're trying to convey with their faces (went to check if they had 11x11 because i was curious about that whole pining line, but wiki doesn't have one linked)
tonal shift after the like.. heavy focus on sam (mostly) dying very... graphic in swimming around in the pain and slow death and almost-murder of it all and then we're having dean kill himself (briefly) to try to take sam's place with no consideration of repercussions, to hey dude we saved (and tried to kill sam) is a werewolf and he changed and he's gonna punch through this cop's chest cavity in a pretty silly manner. so no moral quandary killing him either, look at that. weird. anyway, the woman who played michelle was really good in those emotional scenes
i'm wiped out.
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It's almost embarrassing how much I like the episode lol
So, the new ep dropped yay!
Over all I personally liked
it a few extremely minor nitpicks
but overall, I loved it
If you wanna know my nitpicks, go ahead a read them but otherwise I'm gonna go on a tangent about fire in hell because I wanna :)
does this count as criticism?
Fizzes new song wasn’t as good as thought would be, but I understand it’s improve but I think the joke would have landed better if it was actually extremely catchy like total ear worm of a song
I don’t like that fizz and Bliztos relationship kinda resolved so fast (but I'm a hateful bitch who can't let go of things so hey maybe that’s just something wrong with me :/)
Stolas was in the episode homeboy was hospitalized how are you just up and ready to function. Couldn’t be me honestly after that ruffing up, I would have needed 10 to 12 business years to recover lol
I really don’t understand why Asmodeus was seen as the weakest sin especially since we haven’t seen the other yet. If it's because he canoodling with an imp, ok? But he’s still a sin also if I wanted to pick on any of the sins, we’ve seen so far it would be Bee just saying she’s dating a dog! Someone less than imps just saying!
Crimson is fucking stupid threating a deadly sin (first Loona now him why are people just so causally threating or trying to fight the deadly sins? Are they the big bads or not? We have imps and hellhounds trying to fight them like that doesn’t matter)
We didn’t see Asmodeus go crazy and like fully murder someone see a hint of his powers and frankly I'm a little upset about it lol like don’t tell me was worried about Fizz and didn’t want him hurt. homeboy you are a deadly sin you could turn Crimson and his Goons into paste in like 5 milliseconds like? Like and you expect me to believe Ozzie is the top in this relationship? Please other than the size difference bottom Ozzie is definitely believable if he let Crim bitchify him like that just saying.
This is how I looked when Ozzie didn’t just murder them:
“Ozzie how can you be so stupid Ozzie?” (go watch Rigamarole)
Lol
Don’t get me wrong, I find Crimson and Striker very entertaining but like really? come on...
Anyhow fire!
This episode very much answers my questions on fire in hell
I didn’t want to vocalize this because I was worried it was an extremely dumb question
I totally missed in Murder Family that blitzo says to Martha (#bring back Martha)
“Yeah, your fire doesn't really work on us” yeah, your fire
I always assumed the termed ‘hell fire’ was just a dramatic saying I didn’t think it was literal
But even if it was literal, I didn’t think Hell Fire would work on Hell Borns, I thought it would be a sinners only things like if sinners are supposed to be in hell to be like confronted with sin and tortured why would the imps and such be affected by the fire you know? How are imps and such supposed to help torture the sinners if they are also affected by hell fire? And with now much stuff is on fire in the background in the show I always assumed it was for show when the backgrounds got too earthy like hey don’t worry, we’re still in hell
So, I assumed that each ring has different fire (even though earth as also has colored fire but that’s not important) and if you were born from a certain ring that fire wouldn’t hurt you so if you were from the lust ring then lust fire wouldn’t hurt you. Still seems very inefficient if you move rings to go work in another but hey not my show.
So, from what we can see lust has blue
greed has green
wrath has... orange?
And sloth as purple or light blue I think from the little sloth people’s candles I'm assuming.
gluttony has... yellow? pink? i dont know i think this is the few eps without fire in it tbh i think...
So that being said blizto, frizz, and barbie are form greed because the fire in the flash back was green good to know
It makes since in hindsight tbh with they’re entertainment background and bltzo working in LooLoo land I guess idk why you’d work somewhere with the robot version of the guy you thought you hated but hey whatever a gig is a gig I suppose. Also, that means LooLoo World is in the pride ring since Charlie took Vaggie to the LooLoo World unless Charlie can move Vaggie through the rings as like a princess of hell perk thing idk. Also dick move Stolas to take your kid to the discount amusement park (if I was Octavia, I'd be so petty about this just saying. I can't believe Stella let this happen)
Idk why Blitzo didn’t mention that he was also from greed when IMP went to go see Moxxies dad but not important I guess
(also, it was nice seeing Striker and Crimson in the new ep tbh)
Also, in the roller-coaster in LooLoo land that Millie said she liked had fire on it and how come that didn’t hurt anyone? Also, the explosion at the end of LooLoo land the Blzito and the M&Ms were messed up but not really like you know Fizz levels of messed up granted we didn’t see how close Blitzo and M&Ms were to the explosion
Side note
Why were there explosives under the table to begin with at Fizz’s party? No wonder it looked like Blitzo tried to set him up like? That was planned idk someone had it out for him
I understand the explosion is what messed up Fizz but like I feel like the extra damage from the fire shouldn't have caused that much damage also Fizz was facing the explosives he should have died just saying face and head blow off completely
Also, how can the horses have fire mains if fire hurts them?
still cute tho :)
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