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killthe-illusionarydreams · 4 years

Text

Ashes To Ashes

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader

Request: ‘Please could you write a Fred Weasley imagine where you’re inside the burrow when Bellatrix sets it on fire and Fred runs in to get you out?? Thank you, I’m really loving you writing!’ For anonymous

Ps- i havent read the books or seen the movies in a while so I kinda went w the time it was fleur & bills wedding & intergrated it w that, sorry if its not what u wanted but I did write Bellatrix’s attack in x

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Today was the big day. For today was the the day where Fleur & Bill were finally to be wed. For their celebration to erase war from anyones thoughts, today they were just two kids in love, not undercover Order Workers. Today they were simply girl & boy.

“Oi Y/N hurry up, Fleur’s asking for you” Ginny shouts practically breathless as she runs past your room, trying to find Hermione for the bride.

You pick up the gorgeous bouqet that earlier today you picked up from the florist for the woman and made your way downstairs into the living room. As you take a closer look, you notice something is off. Fleur was standing rigidly still, looking in the mirror unblinking.

“Fleur, darling, are you alright?”

The woman remained silent, Y/N had no idea what to do, she’d never seen her friend so paniced, so immobile. Ever since Y/N’s sixth year (after the Triwizard Tournament) the two kept in contact, maintaining a solid friendship with the other, who wouldve known that years later Fleur would join the family that you had already been apart of.

“Its okay to be nervous.” You sit beside the Frenchwoman “Just talk through it” grabbing her hand you pull her down to sit beside you.

“It’z all so scary Y/N. I love Bill, I really do, but what if he realises he doesnt feel the same about me and leaves me there?” She faces you, eyes glossed over

That caused you to frowm slightly “Bill loves you more than he loves life itself Fleaur, everybody knows that he’d do anything for you just to see you happy- not many can say that they have a person like that.” You smile lightly, thinking about your person. “You constantly say how much you love him, so if you stil feel that for him, theres no need to be scared of getting married-These are the normal pre wedding doubts, none of them are true. Besides, I’m sure if Bill tried to run away from such a gorgeous and talented person as you, Molly would raise havoc and go to the ends of the earth to get him back.”

Fleur looks up at you, smiling, but with stray tears going down her face “Thank you Y/N” she throws herself forward and hugs you “It’s just a big step & I’ve been so emotional lately because of-“ she hesitates

A look of realisation dawns on you and you beam, hugging her once more but tighter “You’re joking? Congratulations!” You give her a peck on the cheek “Does Bill know?” You queried as she shook her head

“Non, I only confirmed it a week ago. Please dont tell anyone Y/N.” She looks at you with pleading eyes and you vigorously nod

“Of course. I wont say a thing, this is your secret. But how about we start getting ready for your wedding hmm.”

As Y/N started to do Fleurs makeup, Hermione rushed in with the wedding dress that her and Molly had been making final adjustments to, Ginny was running around frantically trying to get all the guests in the right places and seats. Once commisioning your help to shout at a group of loiterers to leave the premises because they wouldnt listen to the red head girl. All in all, after many hours, Fleaur was ready.

“You look gorgeous.” Gabrielle beamed at her sister

“Stunning.”

“Ethereal.”

“I might just steal you from Bill” you wink and cause her to laugh and blow you a kiss “I’ll go get everyone ready, you still have plenty of time to relax.” Handing Gabrielle the bouqet, you rush out of the room, which proved to be quite difficult in heels. But bearing through the pain, you get outside and see rows and rows of the fragile golden chairs set on either side of the long purple carpet. The supporting poles to the gazeebo top were entwined with gorgeous white and gold flowers. As you look to where there was supposed to be an enormous bunch of balloons, you frown to see it bare.

“George!” You shout getting his attention “Wheres Fred? You were supposed to the balloons up ages-“ you feel strong arms pick you up and spin you around, making you let out a shriek of surprise, thankfully not loud enough to get the attention of the others

“I’m here my love, disposable at your command.” He purrs into your ear, sending chills down your spine

“Put me down asshole” you laugh and turn to face him, before you could manage to say anything you were taken aback at how he looked. “You got a haircut.” You stated plainly and ran a hand through his hair as he put his arms around your waist.

“Correction, George cut my hair when I wasnt paying attention so ‘people would be able to tell the difference between us’” he wrinkled his nose

You stare at him, dumbstruck “As if the hole on the side of his head wasnt enough.” Fred laughs and says thats what he said “I like it, it suits you.”

Fred grins and kisses you, “Lets face it Y/N you like anything when its to do with me.”

You roll your eyes and hum in agreement “Thats because I love you Fred. But I will seriously consider breaking up with you if you dont get the balloons up as you promised.”

Fred gives you a small peck & jumps back from you “I’m on it!” and runs over towards his brother to finally do what he had to. You smile at him, reminiscing at how you managed to fall in love with such an idiotic man, yet you could never wish for more. Fred Weasley was truly perfect.

Shaking your head you turn back to the guests that were not where they were supposed to be before shouting “Get to your seats and away from the food please! Thats for after the ceremony!” You swat their hands before adding “If you dont know where youre supposed to be, go to Hermione and Molly, they will tell you.” You motion to the pair before walking around to make last minute adjustments.

The wedding ceremony went beautifully, Fleur was walked down with her bridesmaids: Gabrielle & Ginny. When in sight, she rendered everyone breathless, she was ethereal, the most gorgeous a person could possibly look. Molly teared up from the get go at the sight of her eldest marrying, many more joined in when they said their vows. You could not believe that the day of your friends wedding had finally arrived. Throughout the entire sitting down portion of the ceremony, Fred was holding your hand and rubbing circles on it, an assurance that through everything you went through- you were still together- still alive.

The loud music was ringing through the field, dancing bodies surrounded you, but you paid them no mind, your main focus on Fred.

“Did I tell you how gorgeous you look Y/N?”

You laugh lightly as you sway to the beat “No, I must’ve missed it the other ten times you said it”

“Well you do, absolutely bewitching, are you sure you didnt use a love poition on me? I never knew feeling this was possible.” He jokes as he spins you

“Must be my natural charm and charisma that got you so captured Fred.”

“Must be.” He mutters softly looking into your eyes. Fred was completely besotted by you, more than anyone had ever seen him be, he just knew that Y/N was perfect. The way that she’d light up any room she walked in, the way that she’d never back down from a challenge, and just simply how she made him feel. Dear Merlin he loved the girl. “After this do you fancy going away for a bit?”

You look at him sceptically “Planning out your murderous fantasies are we?”

He laughs and shakes his head “You’re impossible. No, since the shops closed I thought we could go away somewhere before everything with the war kicks off, I want as much time with you as I can get.”

“Oh” you forgot that the wizarding world was on the brink of war “Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that. But if you sneak George along i swear to Merlin I will live through my murderous fantasy & kill the pair of you.”

Fred chuckles again, before nodding “Promise, no George. I think he got an eyefull when he barged into our room without knocking.”

“Serves him right.” You mumble “I told him on multiple occasions to knock.”

The rest of the song died down and you stayed in Freds arms for a moment, before he was being wisked away to dance with Aunt Muriel, he held an awfully sour look as you giggled when she hounded on him to straighten his back, then saying that he was too tall.

“I’m a bit cold, I’ll go get a jacket then I’ll be right back” Y/N kissed his cheek & left to get back inside the burrow. Thinking nothing of it, she poured herself another drink, smiling to herself at how Fred would have to have another dance with Muriel. What an awful woman.

Unbeknown to the girl, a silver patronus intruded on the celebration to announce grave news. “The Ministary has fallen. The Minister of magic is dead. They are coming. They are coming.” Everyone scrabled to find their loved ones, to make sure that they were safe, but before Fred even had the chance to look for Y/N, everything burst into havoc. The gazeebo was now engulfed in flames, Death Eaters showing up everywhere to curse them.

“Y/N!” Fred shouted, frantically looking around for the girl “Y/N!”

He turned around and was greeted by a paniced Mr Weasley “Theres not much time Fred, I dont know where she is, you need to get to safety and leave. Now!”

Fred ignored his fathers protests and ran, dodging various spells being shot from either side. He had to find you, he had to know you were safe.

An abrupt crash jolts you back into reality, you get up to run and go outside but with a sudden ‘whoosh’ and black smoke- two Death Eaters appear infront of you.

“Shit.” You mumble & grab your wand, quickly dodging their spells you manage to knock one out & try to deal with the other. “You’re quite persistant-“ blue sparks shoot from your wand, the figure ran upstairs & you follow.

“And you’re associated with mud-blood scum!” A flash of green emerged from their wand that narrowly missed you, you grin

“You missed.” You kick a chair at the figure, momentarily distracting them to cast a spell “Stupefy! Petrificus totalus!” As the figure was knocked out & bound together, you walk over and spit out “Get a life, prick” snapping their wand in two.

In the middle of your fight, you had not noticed that the commotion outside had turned to an arsonists playground. looking through the window you call for Fred, hearing no response your heart stops, you leave the room & try to get down the stairs but now they were already engulfed by flames.

“Oh shit” you panic and shoot spells at it to stop the fire from spreading, but to no avail, it only got worse. Smoke was now clouding your vision, realising that if you were not to jump down you’d perish in this fire. Letting out a short breath, you hype yourself up for the leap of your life “You can do it Y/N. Come on” violetly coughing, you jump. Unfortunately landing a fair few stairs too high. Unbearable pain shoots up through your leg & you cry out in pain.

Sinking to the floor you couldnt even move, the pain in your arm and leg restricting you. This was it, this would be how you die. All alone, with no one to help you, no one to save you. In a burning house. Yet the only thought racing through your mind was ‘Is Fred safe’. Thankfully most of the fire was behind you, the staircase had completely gone up in flames however, the roof was begining to crumble down. A plank toppled down, narrowly missing you, but making the room next to you catch on fire.

As you were losing conciousness you hear a strained yell “Y/N!” You try to respond, but all that came out was a series of violent coughs “Y/N im coming, hang on!” You couldn’t see what was happening, i dont know if it was the thick cloud of smoke or the fact that you were breathing most of it in, but your vision blurred.

A faint figure emerged, breathless, trying to get through the flames & to you fast enough “Hey Y/N ive got you, im here.” You felt yourself being picked up & your body fell like a ragdoll. “Oh merlin dont die on me Y/N.” Was the last thing you heard before passing out.

The abrupt light and noise woke you up, yet you were unable to open your eyes, they were far too heavy for the little energy you had. Were you dead? Is this what death felt like?

“Stop pacing Fred, she’ll be fine.” You heard a voice say, however, unable to distinguish who it belonged to “shes a strong girl, the nurses said so.”

“Yeah they also said she’d wake up yesterday, so my apologies if I dont believe what they have to say.” He snapped

Fred. Oh yes, Fred. He came into the building to save you didnt he? So that answered your question of being dead. You were very much alive, but dear Merlin you were in unbearable pain.

“She’ll be up and about soon though? Her body was exhausted thats why shes sleeping so long right?” He continued, sounding unsure. Well if this is how they reacted to you passing out you wouldn’t want to know how theyd react if you died.

“And id appreciate it if I could sleep some more.” You croak out as you let your eyes open. Coming to face the whole clan of distressed red heads, Harry, Hermione & Fleur.

Fred snaps to face you and a look of relief washes over his features “Y/N” he whispers and rushes to your side hugging you “You’re okay. You’re alive. Thank Merlin.”

You try to chuckle, which abruptly turns into a wheze “I’m okay yeah, in a lot of pain but I’m fine.” Fred retreats from you, an apologetic look on his face.

“Come on kids lets give them some space.” Molly ushers everyone out of the room “I’m glad you’re okay Y/N” she sends you a smile and leaves the room for you and Fred to be alone.

Moments pass with Fred just looking at you with glassy eyes before he abruptly let out “You bloody scared me half to death!”

You motion for him to help you sit up “Oh I do apologise that me nearly burning in a fire scared you. I wasnt very happy about it either.”

Fred looks at you speachless, confused at how you can joke about it so soon. He remains quiet before letting out a big sigh and hanging his head into his lap “I thought I lost you.” He mumbles, barely loud enough for you to hear

“Hey, look at me.” You say and put his face into your left hand with the little energy you have “I’m okay, I’m alive. And so are you” he smiles faintly before you continue “Obviously as gorgeous as ever, so nothing irreversible happened.”

He laughs “Obviously.”

While in the room Fred filled you in on what happened, that after the Death Eaters showed up & they fought them off- Bellatrix Lestrange set fire to the burrow & he ran in to get you out. He told you that you passed out & that you had to be taken to St Mungos to treat your broken leg and the burn on your arm.

“The nurses said you were lucky to get out alive Y/N” he said lowly, not being able to bear the thought of your death.

“Im alive because of you Fred. Thank you.” You offer a weak smile “There were two Death Eaters in the house when it burned up-“

“Thats not on your concious to bear, Its on Bellatrix Lestrange.”

You nod, in all honesty you didnt feel bad that they perished in the fire- their downfall was their own undoing. But what was on your mind was the fire burn “When I’m better do you recon I’ll l have a cool badass scar?”

Fred shakes his head as he holds your hand, of course thats what Y/N is thinking about “‘course you will, It’ll become part of badass backstory.”

“Good” you mumble and close your eyes. After a long silence you relax back into your pillow, the sleeping draft & skelly-grow hitting you like a brick. You begin to mumble incoherent sentences

“Hey Freddie?”

He looks at your peaceful face, all calm against the pillow and responds “Yes my love?”

After a little pause of small mumbles, you ask “When I’m better, can we leave for our trip?”

“Whatever you want Y/N.” He smiles lightly & watches you drift off to sleep, hoping that ‘better’ would come along faster.

—————

Ahh okay hi! Omg this took so long to write, again sorry its not the actual bellatrix fire story, i jus forgot how it happened & when I remembered I wrote too much of it. <33

#slytherin #harry potter #hogwarts #hufflepuff #gryffindor #ravenclaw #james potter #remus lupin #sirius black #draco malfoy #fred weasley x slytherin #fred weasley imagines #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley #fred and george #fred weasley x slytherin!reader #hermione granger #ron weasley

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word-addict-lisette · 3 years

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Dear Lisette,

I am back in you inbox, yay! How was your day? How's life? How's school?

I am really mad because we had this piece of work and it was like "pen down your idea on this statement, 'i can do whatever i want on the internet as long as i don't get caught' and i put down my thoughts which were 'this statement is true, i stand by it and you can do whatever you like as long as you don't get caught and don't own up' and then people were like throwing shade at me and i looked at it. I have 5 comments.

My teachers tried to delete it, my classmates literally lectured me and then she read it out loud and the whole class went looking for that one note i made. In the comments, people are spelling my name in caps. It was my opinion, and oh, look all of them are basically hypocrites. Let me just say, these people make me uncomfortable, they don't talk about exactly nice things or approriate things and they are all commenting ( without names too may i add) like "KAT, THAT'S NOT HOW THINGS WORK!" but with my real name and just arghhh.

Also if my teachers wanted me to say, "no, that isn't the right thing to do," or any other answer that the others provided them with, they shouldn't have asked for my opinion. They should have just forced us all to just type the same thing. The other people all wrote like, "no, its unethical and bad" or "False, no, its bad" and stuff like that, filmsy evidence and elaboration. I HAVE MORALS, i am just saying the truth. I feel like the victim of a hate crime. People don't like me enough already, i am a very intresting person, uh, yeah, we are gonna stop there.

Enjoy the rant i guess? I don't know? I am sorry for loading on you but there's a little extra rant so uh, yeah. im just gonna take this out, one sec.

Ok, so uh my teacher was like, next week, we are making pancakes. Fluffy pancakes. It was changed to pancakes without eggs? and now we have to make it ourselves, at home. Where do i get flour? What do i do with the extra flour? I don't know how to cook at all, my partner who has been extremely controlling and like kinda driving me insane, ( ahem i did the whole coursework) also she uses my friend's name for everything? Like, bestie i was literally helping out and you went all, "Oh you don't want (friend's name) to see you burnt right?". Obviously i don't but if i burnt down my house, she wouldn't be surprised. I BURNT MYSELF LAST YEAR, SHE SAW ME BURN MYSELF. Well, my friend burnt me and then the week after that, she burnt herself.

This happens a lot. Also, the very common questions and statements of, "Are you straight?" , "aren't you and (friend's name) dating?", "you guys would make such a cute couple" , " aren't you bi?" and "i thought the two of you were dating," there is nothing wrong with being bi but i am not attracted to her like that. So, they use her for leverage over me to get me to do what they want and also think im dating her? If we were dating, we would both be homeless. I like my house. This doesn't only happen with her. I once got shipped with my brother. I hugged him and some guy was like, "oh you guys like each other," that was awkward. Can i just add, a lot of people like majority of that community know we are siblings.

I also get shipped with his best friend, thanks to a rumor my brother made up. So, sometimes, i would get like comments like, "oh, you like him" or "(brother's name) told me that you and (brother's best friend) are dating," we are not dating. WE ARE JUST REALLY GOOD FRIENDS. I LIKE A FICTIONAL CHARACTER. LEAVE ME ALONE. Also, everytime i have a picture of a guy on my phone or something my cousin just has to tell my brother. THEY ARE STREAMERS. ONE IS OF V FROM BTS SO I CAN TRAMATISE MY FRIEND.

Everytime i cry, someone comes in my room. It is so annoying. LEAVE ME ALONE, I WANT TO CRY. This is why i started reading sad books, listening to sad songs, watching sad movies so i have a reason to cry. There was this once, i wasnt selected to be part of my choir's competition and i was sad about it because i didn't feel good enough. THEY SAID I WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH. So, i cried but it wasn't enough so i read the saddest book i could find so i had a reason to cry but by that time, my feelings were gone. This is why i get breakdowns when im overwhelmed because of all this. You know how old i am. I have to deal with this and the pressure of always wanting to be perfect. What else can i do? I am not pretty or smart or talented or have friends, i have like 6 friends and nobody ever keeps me company. So, i focus on being perfect. 100%, i deal with not having any attention because my parents didn't pay me any attention just because i was "independent" or something?

Did i mention, i babysit all my siblings? I am the second child. I baby-sit my older brother. I am sleep-deprived because i can't sleep well at night and i constantly worry about everything and i have to take care of all my friends and it is so exhausting. Yet, i can not cry.

Thanks for staying with me through whatever that was. Uh, yeah, i took the quiz and got chaotic academia. That is my aesthetic. I really want one of those fancy skirts they wear like on pintrest and stuff? Like you know what i mean? The academia skirt? Yeah, i don't have one yet.

Question of the day, what is your dream profession or you could answer my other question which is what would you want to look like? Or you could answer both?

Ok, thank you again. i am gonna go study. Love and hugs and just literal joy sent your way!

- Kat, the ultimate dino mom of Leo, Billy Bob, Jessica, Sophie, Jackson, Sarah, Lily, the Micheals and all her other kids. (Jessica, Sophie and Jackson are mailboxes and Lily is a computer, Micheal is my screwdriver and laptop pencil, there are two micheals.)

Dear Kat,

It's really good to see you in my inbox. I'm sorry for replying late, but exams really had occupied my schedule today and I got my Saturday exam tomorrow. This week is going to be stressful and today's day has been pathetic. I had nothing to do except study and write exams. I feel like I haven't really been social recently and That I'm losing touch with people that I used to be close with and basically I'm letting overthinking take over my mind.

That is so sick. Why is someone's genuine opinion bothering them so much? I totally wouldn't be able to tolerate that. They ought to understand that there is a fine line between a fact and an opinion, and what you stated was just an OPINION. they have no right whatsoever to come at you like that. I totally agree... the teachers ought to have not asked for your opinion if all they desired was a particularly specific answer which opposed the statement. one of the reasons I hate the schooling system has to be THIS. people who are putting comments like that ought to realize that what you stated is exactly what they do in real life. They just want to be seen as the good kid here. At least you have the guts enough to speak the truth.

Miss! You don't have to worry about ranting out to me. You can rant to me for days and I'd still listen. Just go on ranting nobody is stopping you.

Ahhh! I've had that happen to me. I really understand how tough that can be. I really really hate being shipped with someone who I am just platonically friends with like you've got no valid proof to believe that we are romantically involved with each other. I've burnt myself plenty of times too. It's not a pleasant experience. Plus I also hate having controlling partners. Cause all they do is boss you around while they are barely doing a thing. It sucks.

Why? Just why? Why does it even matter to them? Who you date and what your sexuality is, is none of their business. I have no idea why people concern themselves with topics that really don't involve them. It's like people are just ready to make gossip out of anything. A person can't have a bestie without not liking them? I don't get what's so difficult to understand about that. I hate it when I'm casually talking to a guy and people start shipping us and start spreading rumors of us being in a romantic relationship. Another thing they do is, if a person likes me, they automatically assume that I like him back when I've barely even ever spoken to that guy. And yes! I like fictional characters! Don't even assume I like any of you fools cause You idiots bully me and ship me with total crackheads... And my standards are good enough for me to not include you guys in my list of *appropriate candidates* which consists of non-existent people.

Similarly, the moment I'm chatting with some guy, or like have a pic with someone on my mobile phone people just assume that fact that I'm crushing on him. Like no! I don't. We are friends... the others are celebrities, Why can't you understand that? I can't imagine how thick their skull must be considering they can't let a small statement like that sink in.

The crying thingy... I feel personally attacked. Nobody lets me do anything in peace, let alone crying. I literally use the washroom in my room and even my sister comes in there just banging on the door asking me to get the heck out of there and go somewhere else, like can't she use the other two washrooms or what? I like listening to sad stuff and reading angst cause somehow or the other it calms me down... it makes me feel at peace cause I know I'm not the only one who feels like crying. I've got a lot of friends, nobody remembers my birthday, I remember all of theirs'. They don't even text me, It's always me who takes the first step. All my friends just want me by their side cause I'm a smartass they want to show off as a trophy and cause I've got much better sarcasm than them. They just want to benefit from me. That's all. GOD, I'm not pretty at all. I look like a random idiot all the time. I look pathetic. And I lack talent... And you! I warned you, miss! You are pretty, beautiful, talented, smart, friendly, caring, kind and THE BEST!!!

I've never been given attention. Never ever. My sister has always stolen the spotlight. And I hate it. Not even my friends acknowledge me, my parents just ehhhhh. No matter how good I score, No matter how good I behave, No matter what. I'm just never good enough. My parents think of me as a rebellious kid. And I don't know what to do about that. All I've ever done is listen to them. My parents never allowed me to go out and play with my friends when I was a kid, they never let me go on overnight trips, and they barely let me spend time with the few friends I have. They never let me go to outings my school friends planned. Despite that, I never complained. I never had good friends because of that, yet I never complained. A lot of kids my age roam around in shopping malls by themselves, have sleepovers, spend money, roam around with tons of makeup on their faces, are in relationships, and even get into illegal shit. I've never done anything Like that. And yet... I'm never the good kid. I'm still the rebel.

I've got to take care of my sister almost every day. Get her to study, study myself, take care of myself while tolerating my grandmother. I really don't like my grandma, she s very fussy and just keeps yelling around the house the moment my dad and mom leave the house. I've got sensory overload because of her voice. And now I sit and have an anxiety attack almost every time she speaks. I've always got to strive for perfection as well. And I too can't sleep well at night just cause all the worries of the world, keep weighing me down.

Chaotic academia sounds good. It's the same aesthetic my sister got when I asked her to take the test! And oooh! Me too! I love those skirts and outfits they show on Pinterest. I'd love to have them someday.

My dream profession has to be that of a writer. Or perhaps even running a library. just something cozy. Ohh! I'd love to have brown hair, and I'd want to be tall just a little shorter than What I am right now. I just reached my father's height yesterday. And more or less, I'd like the rest to stay just as it is. and perhaps a lighter shade of skin tone. What about you though?

My question for you! If you were to be stranded on a beach island for a week. Who would you bring with you and how would you spend your time there. You can include whatever elements of nature you want to include like forests, lakes, and all.

Sending love, warmth, hugs, and whatever I have to spare that you would like to you!!!!

-Love from Lisette

P.S. That's an interesting family you've got, right there!

#kat the eccentric(indeed)#sweet sweet asks #dear kat #love from lisette #long post

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duhragonball · 3 years

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damn that ask you rblogged got me thinking that I really am tired trying to figure out db as a whole like I wanna enjoy goku to the max but it gets me so tired trying to enjoy it while knowing that things could be so much better if toriyama wasnt rushed on a regular basis and if he thought some things thru

I'm not sure what ask you're referring to, anon, so I'm not sure what you mean. I'm guessing this is in reference to Tien having minimal backstory.

I can understand wanting more from a particular work. It's probably to Dragon Ball's credit that one of the biggest complaints from the fans is that there isn't enough attention lavished on the supporting and ancillary characters. It amazes me how many fans carry a torch for more Launch or Raditz when they haven't been used in over 30 years, and they weren't even used that much back then. They made an impression, and people want more. I wish I could make a character like Launch with that kind of demand.

On the other hand, stories have to call it done at some point. Akira Toriyama had to tell the story of Goku, and he had to do it on a deadline, and even if he had more time and more resources, he'd still have to make the hard decisions about what to keep in and what to throw out. He was never going to be able to include a subplot about Tien's parents, it would derail the story that he was actually trying to tell.

Star Wars is a good example. They were going to make those sequel trilogy movies, and Episode VII was going to be about Han Solo, and VIII was going to be about Luke Skywalker, and IX would have been about Princess Leia, except Carrie Fisher died before they could actually go through with it. That still bugs me. I'm not sure I'll ever be able to form a coherent opinion on Episode IX, because I'll always be comparing it to a Carrie-Fisher-led movie that ultimately never got made. I'm kind of angry that they waited thirty-plus years to do a project like this, and they ended up waiting too long to get it right. My point is that everything is finite, and everything has a deadline, even when you don't notice it.

At some point, creators have to set their priorities and stick to them, for the sake of the work. Visual artists do this all the time. No one complains when a painting doesn't detail every last strand of hair, or the individual pores on a person's nose.

I've seen plenty of folk complain that there should be more official material devoted to the underutilized characters. The thing I can never seem to get anyone to buy into is that the Launches and Turleseseses and Tien's moms are kind of our job. If we see a minor detail and we want More of That, then we gotta make it ourselves, because no one else is going to.

I mean, I think people get that, but sometimes I'm not so sure. Like, Broly got a new movie and fans are like "Well now they should do one for so-and-so!" Like Broly was some obscure background character, whose appearance in 2018 signals some sort of Obscure Background Character Renaissance. Look, I'd love to see some sort of Launch/Haskey/Colonel Violet action heist story, but Toei's never going to do that, because they're too focused on the big characters with the biggest appeal. Priorities.

I'm not saying this to be mean, Anon, but I get a sense of bitterness in your words, like you can't enjoy Dragon Ball as it is because you're too frustrated with what it might have been. Trust me, you'll waste your life that way. Nothing will ever be perfect, and you'll miss all the good parts while you're holding out for even better ones.

Actually, this reminds me of one of my favorite Far Side comics, where these people in the desert find a water fountain, and one of them wants to push his luck even further before he takes a drink. That's the sort of mentality I'm trying to combat here. That's why I get so mad about fans who gripe about video quality and aspect ratios and minor details. They're so fixated on getting the absolute highest quality trees that they never get to enjoy the forest.

For my part, I enjoy Dragon Ball for all sorts of reasons, including the dumber stuff that goes hand-in-hand with the awesome stuff. If you find yourself unable to do that, then don't sit tight and wish it were better. Go find other things that you like more. Or make the kind of content that you can't find anywhere else. Everybody's always griping about Toyotaro screwing things up like he's the only game in town. I hardly ever think about the guy, because I got into JoJo around the time the DBS manga started doing original stories. And there's plenty of fan works. My dashboard is routinely filled with Yamcha/Tien slash. Some butthole keeps spamming this endless Super Saiyan OC fic. He's not doing it for his health, or for the adulation; he's doing it because no one else will do it for him.

I'll get off of that particular soapbox for a moment, because I have no way of knowing if you're an aspiring content creator or anything like that. A lot of people aren't looking to make their own stuff like that. They just want to enjoy stuff, and that's fine. Dragon Ball's here and it's done and it's plenty big. There's a lot to enjoy. But if you say you're "trying" to enjoy it and it just isn't working for you, then maybe you need to put it down and look for something else, at least for a while.

#ask duhragonball #i don't know if i qualify as a fandom grandpa or if that's even a thing i want to be #but on topics like these i find myself feeling like that's where i'm headed

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hey-hey-chan · 4 years

Text

The Protagonist - Hyunjin

❀ Slice of life

❀ Warning: mentions of death & covid-19

❀ Word count: 8k

❀ When your best friend Ryujin cheats on her boyfriend who you’re also friends with, you’re stuck to pick up the pieces of their relationship. When Ryujin starts pushing you away and Hyunjin starts keeping you close, you wonder who was a better friend to you in the first place and uncover new feelings you never knew you had.

❀ A/N: i know i haven’t written in like a year?? but i suddenly had inspiration to write. Honestly, I felt the inspiration after I didn’t get picked job opportunity I really wanted (and thought I was going to get). I was put on the waitlist, but it still hurt my ego. But, I had some other good news and you can read on my blog about it, but I still wanted to write. I didn’t really have anything in mind, but I just let my words take me where it needed to be. Also, don’t get used to me writing, I won’t be writing often or at all. I’m not that into skz anymore LOL

------

Do you ever feel like you’re not the protagonist of your own story?

Yeah, that’s how I feel everyday.

Especially today.

“Ok, on the count of three, we reveal our statuses ... one... two..”

“And three!”

I tore open the letter from my dream college, Seoul University, probably giving myself a paper cut in the process.

“OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, I GOT IN! I got in y/n, holy shit!” I heard my friend’s words over the speaker, but I just couldn’t get the stupid envelope open.

“Fuck this.” I grabbed the scissors nearby and cut the damn thing open, revealing a thin piece of white paper.

I regret to inform you that you have been...

I felt tears well up in my eyes instantly at the words “regret” and “inform”, already knowing where the letter is taking me.

“Y/N?? What does it say?!”

I cleared my throat. “I didn’t get in...”

I cried harder, silently, when I heard her moans of agony. “No fucking way! You’re a WAY better student than I am! There’s something wrong.”

I shook my head. I was a good student, but I wasn’t the best personality. I was only in two clubs: acapella club and bagel club. Not good enough for the best university in our city.

“It’s ok. I have plenty more universities I applied to, I’ll be ok. I’m so, so happy for you though! I swear you’re gonna have so much fun!”

My stomach churned as I said those words. Did I really mean them? I didn’t feel happy in the moment.

“Ugh, I hate this... I really thought we would be roommates!”

I set the pristine piece of paper on my desk; I didn’t even want to look at it anymore.

“Don’t worry about it. This could even be a good thing! We’ll meet new people and just widen our group of friends. It’ll be awesome. Plus, I’m too weird for this clean cut college.” I joked.

That made her laugh. “You’re right, they couldn’t handle your personality. Anyways, I got to go to drama club right now, talk later? And again, I’m really sorry y/n.”

I pursed my lips. “Talk later, and don’t worry about me!” I ended the phone call and let the tears fall freely from my eyes.

I knew this would happen.

How could I compete with a chemistry major with a 4.0 GPA and the president of 2 clubs with a bombass personality? I was nothing compared to her.

I picked up the piece of paper and took one good look at it before crumpling it into a ball and throwing it. The soft thud barely made a sound which was anticlimactic. I was trying to have an angsty teen moment here??

Sometimes I felt like I was just a side character in a movie or a book. I was that girl who watched her best friend experience all these things in life and you just stand by them and cheer them on. They are the ones who have a mental breakdown and somehow end up with the love of their life at the end.

That was my best friend, Ryujin.

She was the one that every guy and girl fell for. Her charisma bounced off walls and even made me dizzy at times. And it wasn’t even like she was the “girly-girl” that we see in movies, no no no, tomboys are much trendier nowadays. She was confident around guys and wasn’t afraid to embarrass herself in front of anyone. I was insanely jealous of her sometimes which I would never admit.

She’s funny and adventurous, pretty and athletic: she is everything I ever wanted to be in a person.

She even had the hottest guy in the school as her boyfriend, Hwang Hyunjin.

I, on the other hand, was the opposite of her. I wasn’t overly awkward and uncomfortable to be around like the protagonists of some books. I wasn’t even cold and hostile like the mysterious girl in fanfiction.

No, I was just completely and utterly average.

I wasn’t “ugly” or whatever that means. You wouldn’t cringe away if you saw me, but the only guys I attract on the streets are the ones who might follow me home. I was friendly to people I met and was the queen of small talk. I was girlier than I wanted to be and try to put on makeup, but end up with botched eyebrows and nonexistent mascara-- that didn’t stop me from trying though.

I cringed at every horror movie, I hate sports, I love astrology, and the only close friends I have are girls.

Well, the only friend I truly have is Ryujin and all her friends became mine.

Any who, I was the girl that if a story was written about her, it’d be about 2 minutes long. I never had any big failures or big achievements. No family issues or tragic past. Nothing. I was a normal girl with a normal life.

And now one who wouldn’t even be going to college with her best friend who she depends on for her social life. Oh yeah, I was a burden too. Now she can’t even be fully happy because of me.

Great, just great.

I felt a buzz near the bottom of my foot. I sighed and kicked it towards me.

‘Ok i wasnt going to ask you this, but i just have to. did you know?’ -hyunjin

I squinted my eyes, re-reading the message to see if I got that correctly. What the heck is he talking about?

‘what are you talking about?’

‘are you being serious?’ -hyunjin

Ok, now this is just weird. I sat up in my bed, suddenly interested in this conversation.

‘im being serious. i have no clue what you’re talking about. care to inform me?’

I sent the text, realizing this is probably the longest conversation Hyunjin and I have had over text. We often hung out in person in groups, since he was Ryujin’s boyfriend and we did have the occasional deep conversation, but talking like this was new territory.

‘im 100% sure ryu would tell her best friend that she cheated’ -hyunjin

Wait. What did he just say?

Suddenly I was standing, pacing around the room.

‘ok, i’ve officially lost whatever ur talking about. what the hell are you saying? ryujin did not’ I typed in confidence, but realized I shouldn’t immediately attack the victim. I erased the message and called him.

He picked up almost instantly.

“What the hell did you just say?” I heard him shift around, probably in his bed.

“I said, I’m sure that Ryujin would tell you if she cheated-”

“Ok, that, stop right there. You’re saying Ryujin cheated on you?” I felt my head spin.

Ryujin can’t be a cheater. That’s impossible. And plus, she would’ve told me if something was wrong in her perfect relationship.

I heard a loud chuckle on his side. “Wow, you really don’t know do you.” I shook my head, but I realized he couldn’t see me.

“Um, I really don’t, so I would really love it if you explained.”

“What’s there to explain? She came to my house two days ago and told me she was cheating on me with Jeongin. Yang fucking Jeongin, who is, yes, a grade younger than us!”

I winced at his volume. Hyunjin was a lot of things, but he definitely wasn’t a liar. Neither was Ryujin which is why I had no idea what was going on.

“You have anything to say?” He asked. But I was in complete shock.

“Well, um... I’m gonna talk to her about this. Bye, Hyunjin.” I hung up the phone and tossed it on the side of my bed despite his muffled talking.

What the fuck is going on?

-------

“I’m asking you a simple question, did you or did you not cheat on Hyunjin?”

After Ryujin came home from drama club, I was already there waiting at her door. She gave me a weird look since we live a good 20 minute walk away from each other, but yes, this conversation was worth the exercise.

“Excuse me, what did you just say?” She asked with a sassy tone, but I had no time for this bullshit.

“Did you cheat on Hyunjin? God Ryu, just answer the question!” I felt my face turning red and I knew I was losing my temper. I had no idea why I was so upset, but I just was.

I saw her features contort, and I knew I was going to hear the truth.

“Ok, yeah, yeah I did.”

My heart dropped.

We didn’t say anything to each other for a couple of seconds. It was like we were both taunting each other, which she doesn’t have the right to do in this moment.

“Are you serious? Why?” I asked incredulously.

She didn’t say anything yet walked passed me and straight to her door.

“Hey, what the hell?”

“Y/N, I cheated on him, what else is there to say? It’s done, it happened!” I almost flinched at her tone. It was bitter and angry and it was a tone I was used to with her.

“What the fuck? Ryu, why wouldn’t you tell me? And this is breaking Hyunjin’s heart-”

“You know what? I don’t have to tell you everything about my relationship! It has nothing to do with you. It doesn’t even matter, ok? I just don’t wanna talk about it.”

I stood silently, wondering who was this person in front of me.

“Fine, I’ll leave then.”

As I walked back to my house, I couldn’t help but feel like I was stuck in the protagonist’s drama once again.

-----

It was almost 1am when I got back home. Thankfully, my parents were asleep and thought I was staying the night at Ryujin’s like I told them. I snuck in the house and collapsed on my bed. This was too much emotion for one day.

I peered down at my phone and saw the light illuminate the room.

‘So. is your world shattered like mine?’ -hyunjin

I bit my lip. Was it weird to text my best friend’s ex-boyfriend like this? Technically, we were somewhat of friends too. So I’m not breaking any rules.

‘this is fucked up. im rly sorry man, she really didn’t tell me.’ I brushed my hands through my hair and felt the sweat sticking to it. I had walked back in the spring heat, it was too much.

‘Damn, I didn’t think she would pull something like that and not even tell YOU. that’s cold.’

‘tell me about it. we were just fine earlier today, dont know whats goin on with her.’ I hesitated before typing the next part. ‘also, i know we arent the closest and ik im also ryu’s friend, but im here for you bro. this is a messed up situation’

‘Thanks, that means a lot... most of my friends are making fun of me for getting cheated on... with a JUNIOR. disgusting.’

I snorted. ‘technically, if ryujin didn’t skip a grade, she’d be a junior too.’

‘y/n, pls don’t ruin this moment’

‘fine, fine, disgusting, she cheated on u with a junior. plus ur friends are felix and jisung who are also complete insensitive dickheads sometimes’

‘Thank you.’

I laughed. Hyunjin was always an interesting guy to hang out with. Sure we never texted or talked much, but he was always a joy to have around. He was quiet in school, but he was animated around his friends. And of course, an awesome boyfriend to Ryujin.

Seeing them together made me more aware of my singleness. He would open doors for her, give her his jacket when she was cold, pay for her meals, he even knew how to braid hair, like what the fuck? He was perfect.

And then she cheated on him.

And didn’t even tell me.

I rubbed my forehead. I was always a fixer. I fixed other people’s problems, which made me quite involved in their issues even if I shouldn’t be.

‘but seriously though, im rly sorry this happened to you...’

‘yeah ... a year down the drain. and plus, i got accepted to Seoul University with her today.’ My heart sank, even when I knew it shouldn’t.

Hyunjin was a smart guy, maybe a little too studious for his own good. He had lots of fun in high school, but made sure to go home early to events and not drink if he had a test the next day. He spent hours at the library at times and read in his free time, like me. Ryujin always hated it and thought we were too similar at times. Which is untrue because Hyunjin was way cooler than me.

‘If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t get accepted’

‘That actually did not make me feel better and made me even sadder because what the fuck?? you’re an amazing student!’

That made me smile of course, the valedictorian was complimenting my intellect.

‘aha thanks, i’ll probably end up going to incheon uni which isn’t too far from here so i’ll be ok’

‘That’s good, maybe i should consider going since half the senior class is going to seoul lol’

I scoffed. “hyunjin, don’t give up your dream uni just because ryujin will be there. you probably wont see her as often as u think’

‘If I decided not to go there, it won’t be because of Ryujin. But seriously, I rarely try anything new and i feel like i’m confined to a small group of people. At least at Incheon, I’ll know less people.”

I sighed loudly. Oh Hyunjin, it must suck to get a mental breakdown right before going to college. It happens to the best of us though.

‘well ok, where ever you go, i’ll know you’ll thrive!!’

‘:) thanks y/n. also, ik we dont talk much, but i really do appreciate you.’

Well, that warmed my heart... and my cheeks.

The fact that I was texting my friend’s ex boyfriend snapped me back into reality. And the fact that she cheated on him.

I gulped.

‘aw thanks hyunjin, i appreciate you too. Now get some sleep! it’s almost 2am’

I didn’t get a response back, and I hoped he fell asleep. I changed into my pajamas and did my nightly routine and fell asleep to thoughts of my friend’s ex-boyfriend.

------

I woke up to several buzzes that tickled my side. I grunted and threw the blanket off of me. I found my phone that was flung somewhere and picked it up. I turned off the notifications to stop the constant moving.

“It’s too freaking early for this.” I moaned.

I rubbed my eyes and peered down at the message.

‘hey im sorrrryyy for lashing out yesterday. i just feel guilty about the whole thing and i was afraid to tell you... also i think im in love with jeongin’ -ryujin

My eyes naturally widened at this confession.

Love? Ryujin dated Hyunjin for a whole year! How could she fall in love with Jeongin so easily??

‘excuse me?? what the fuck did you just say cuz i think u just said u LOVE jeongin??’

‘stfu. just hear me out, he’s a great guy and he’s just... normal’ -ryujin

Ok, time to call this bitch.

“Define normal?” I heard her sigh and adjust in her bed. She’s always been an early riser.

“Just, when I was dating Hyunjin, it felt like it had to be this perfect relationship. We were all friends before and it just seemed right that we dated. He was super nice and perfect and not to mention, hot, but it just felt superficial. I don’t know.”

Well this was new. Ryujin never told me much about the problems in their relationship and I thought everything was going well. Well, until now.

“I mean, I get that, you shouldn’t have to date anyone you don’t like. But, you should’ve broken up with him before!”

“You think I don’t know that? I made a mistake, ok? Can you just get off my back about it?”

There’s that temper again.

“Are you serious? You’re the one who texted ME in the morning.”

“I’m just, whatever.” She paused in between her words. “You just wouldn’t understand ‘cause you’ve never been in a relationship! I just can’t describe it, ok?” And on that note, I just hung up the phone. I was in no mood to play these games with her emotional roller coasters.

I bit my lip, knowing she would probably call me more times for hanging up on her, but I wasn’t in the mood. I was caught in between two of my friends, and I knew who was in the right and who was treating me better.

I saw my phone light up a few more times, which made me curious as to what she was sending me.

‘Hey, do you wanna have breakfast with me this morning?’ -hyunjin

I raised a brow. This was not the message I was expecting.

‘only if you’re paying’

‘deal’

-----

Soft r&b played from the speakers as I sipped from my small cup of apple juice, yes, I still drink apple juice.

“So, how are you feeling?” I finally asked the boy.

He was wearing a black tshirt and jeans and his hair was messier than usual. I could tell he wasn’t getting lots of sleep.

“As good as I can be.” He shuffled around in his chair like he had more to say. “Just, it’s still crazy to me. Getting cheated on... it’s a whole new feeling.”

I nodded, but I couldn’t relate to it.

“Yeah...” I trailed off, not really knowing what to say or how to cheer him up.

We locked eyes suddenly and I grew shy. Hyunjin was always hot in my eyes, even though I pretended he wasn’t, for my friend’s sake. And for mine.

“What did she say when you talked to her?”

I laughed. “She totally flipped on me and told me to leave. I have no idea what’s going on with her right now. She’s lashing out for no reason.” I confessed.

“Yeah, she’s acting more temperamental lately. She always had a temper but this time... this time it’s out of control.”

I nodded, understanding what he was talking about. Ryujin was a feisty girl with lots of emotions. I respect her for being in tune with her emotions, but sometimes her actions go too far. Most guys thought it was hot though.

“Anyways, I don’t want to talk about her anymore. What about you? Any relationship problems?”

I forced a small smile. “Nope, all the guys that were ‘into me’ were trying to use me to get to her.”

Hyunjin took a bite out of his sandwich and shook his head. “Stone cold Slytherin.” I laughed at that one.

“Stone cold Slytherin indeed.”

“You know, Ryu has never watched any of the Harry Potter movies?? Which is crazy because I swear the first time we talked to each other it was about what Hogwarts house we would be in.”

I nodded slowly. “Yes, yes I do know that my best friend has never watched the movies. And it pains me everyday.” He rolled his eyes at my teasing tone. “Also, I think that’s because you guys met in Mrs. Park’s English class which I also happened to be in. Remember, we all were friends first?”

I thought back to those days, those simpler times. Hyunjin and Ryujin only dated for a year, but they’d known each other since our first year of high school. We were all somewhat of friends, more like acquaintances. But one day, their friendship just went to the next level.

Hyunjin nodded his head slowly. “Yeah, you’re right. Ryujin isn’t as nerdy as you.” I scoffed, knowing that was not true. I was the dumbest in the friend group.

“Alright, whatever you say.” I was out of witty banter.

We called for the check and walked slowly to his car. For a moment, we just seemed like two friends. Two kids from school who were eating breakfast together.

But we weren’t really. I was his ex-girlfriend’s best friend. And he was the guy my best friend cheated on.

And we were both losing a person who was ignoring us.

“This is me. See you sometime?” His expression was hard to read and I didn’t know if he was saying this just to be kind or if he actually meant it. Either way, I didn’t care.

“Sure. See you.” I waved at him awkwardly and he gave me a small wave back.

-------

A few weeks went by and soon, Ryujin and I were back to normal. I still texted Hyunjin quite often, but Ryujin didn’t know that. It’s not like I was lying to her, but I didn’t feel like she needed to know. It’s not like we were going behind her back and doing anything. He just needed a friend, and so did I.

The whole world was on lockdown and school got shut down early. Everyone was locked in their homes and told to keep a distance from each other in public. My electricity bill was off the charts and I was living off of Netflix for entertainment. Sometimes Ryujin came over, but she was the only one I really saw. She was an only child, so I pitied her.

“Ok, this one or this one?” She held up two outfits that were completely different. One was a dark green shirt that tied in the front and sparkly paired with black jeans that flared slightly at the bottom. The other was a pink blouse with flowers paired with a blue denim skirt.

I looked up from my phone and sat up on the ground.

“That dark green one, it compliments your skin tone and the jeans are cute.” She nodded and tossed the other on her bed.

“Great, Jeongin will love this.”

“Are you sure he understands fashion? He’s like 12.” I felt a pillow hit me face in an instant, but the comment was worth it. The age jokes never got old.

“Shut up! He’s the same age as me, only a grade younger. You know because I skipped a grade.” She bragged. I rolled my eyes and went back to playing on my phone.

“Okay~ Whatever you say. I’m just saying, your boobies hanging out might confuse him-”

She gave me a glare to shut me up from finishing. I shrugged and looked down at my phone.

“Should you even be hanging out with him? We aren’t supposed to hang out with people during this time.”

Ryujin snorted. “It’s my boyfriend, am I supposed to ignore him? I’d rather die.” I rolled my eyes are her insensitive statement. “Plus, aren’t we hanging out right now? You’re not my family.” Ouch, I’d always considered Ryujin family, but I guess she didn’t feel the same.

“That’s different. We’re best friends and I consider you my sister, since you don’t have one.” I spat. She narrowed her eyes at me and I saw the wheels turning in her head to clap back.

“Whatever, these rules are impossible."

I stayed quiet for a little bit, but I had so much to say.

“What? If you have something to say, spit it out.” Wow, was her aggressive tone always this annoying?

I threw up my hands in aggravation. “Fine, I just think you’re moving on too fast from Hyunjin. You just broke up with him-”

“I cheated on him.”

“Ok, you cheated on him. Shouldn’t you wait a little longer to get into a relationship? It’s ... It’s sort of cruel.”

She narrowed her eyes at me but her eyes softened.

“Look, what happened happened already. He knows I have feelings for someone else. I have to live for myself, ok? I’ll see you later.”

She left the room and I knew that was my queue to leave her house.

I picked up my phone and checked my messages before I left. I only had one, how popular of me.

‘what are you doing right now?’ -hyunjin

I furrowed my brows. His timing was impeccable.

‘um... nothing now. why?’

‘can you meet up rn?’

My eyebrows rose in surprise. Mr. Rule Follower wants to break the rules of quarantine? Interesting.

‘... we aren’t supposed to hang out unnecessarily right now.’ I reminded him, just in case he forgot.

I stood from Ryujin’s floor and started to look for my car keys. The perks of being the youngest sibling is that I was given my older brother’s car when he went off to college. Sadly, he’s back, but we share the car.

‘my mom is sick. shes getting tested today’

I froze.

You never expect those words to come out of your friend’s mouth.

‘where r u?’

------

I got in my car and booked it. It’s like I was moving faster than I could think.

Hyunjin’s parents were divorced and he lived with his father, so I knew he was safe to be around. But still, he saw his mom during the summers and occasionally throughout the year. They were close.

I drove up to his house and saw him sitting there with his head buried in his arms.

“Shit.”

I parked on the side of the road and ran out as soon as I could. He jolted up when he heard the slam of my car.

“y/n-”

I grabbed him and immediately pulled him into a hug. I wasn’t sure why I did it, but it felt right.

“It’s ok, it’s going to be ok.” I said before I could think. I wasn’t sure she was going to be ok, or if he was going to be ok, but he didn’t need to know that.

I felt him shake as tears he sobbed into my shoulder.

“She’s so old, y/n. I’m so scared. I hope she doesn’t have it. I fucking hope so bad.” I squeezed him tighter. Tears fell slowly from my eyes as I felt his pain.

“I’m sorry. We’ll be ok. It’ll be ok.” I rubbed his back soothingly and sat on the steps with him when he calmed down.

“I’m sorry for being such an emotional mess right now, I hope you weren’t anywhere important when I texted you. Honestly, I called Ryujin first but she didn’t pick up.” He mumbled the last part.

I frowned, but realized why she didn’t pick up.

“You look guilty, why?”

I thought about lying to him, but what was the use?

“I was actually at her house when you texted me... she was getting ready to go on a date with Jeongin.” I admit.

I saw his face contort and he let out a few strangled cries. I pulled him closer to me and felt his head on my shoulder.

“I’m sorry, I told her not to go.”

“Why? We broke up already. She made her choice.”

He took a small glance at him. His face was red and puffy; his sleep schedule was also not getting better. I knew that because we always texted at 1am.

“I know my opinion doesn’t matter, but I think she made the wrong one.”

He turned to face me and we locked eyes.

Usually with other guys, I’m skittish and sometimes awkward. I wanted to get away from them as soon as I could. But with Hyunjin, I felt at peace. I felt comfortable with him, safe even.

The boy gave me a small smile and patted me on the back. He rested his head on my shoulder again.

“Your opinion always matters, and thank you. For everything.”

“It’s not a problem.” I pet his head like I’ve seen in movies. I don’t think I’ve ever comforted a guy besides my brother. And my brother did not like to get his hair pet.

I guess Hyunjin didn’t either when he shot up. I gave him a startled look.

“What-”

“It is a problem. Why do you run to everyone who needs help, y/n?”

I froze in my spot, not knowing what to say.

“Um, I don’t know. I guess I’m just good at helping people. I like comforting people. I like making people happy.” I tried to cheer him up. I did not want him to feel like he was a burden.

Hyunjin moved out of my grasp and faced me.

“Doesn’t it get tiring though? I’ve never seen you get sad about something. And you got rejected from your dream college that we’ve been talking about for years. Still, nothing.”

I laughed and looked away. This conversation was getting too focused on me and I wanted to shift the topic immediately.

“Um, well of course I get sad. It’s just I deal with my emotions better when I’m alone. I don’t mind people seeing me sad I just want alone time when I’m upset.” That was a good answer.

He wasn’t buying it though.

A calming silence washed over us for a short moment. He kicked a small rock to the side and it trickled down the steps.

“Why do I feel like that’s a cop out answer?”

I was about to give him a snarky response, but I saw the pain in his eyes. He wanted to be distracted from his pain and wanted to focus on me.

“Do you ever feel like you’re just a side character of someone else’s story?” I blurt out. Immediately, I felt like I shared too much about myself, but I couldn’t take it back.

His silence made me anxious. So anxious.

I started to shake my leg, a nervous habit I had. Suddenly, he placed a gentle hand on my leg to stop it from shaking.

“Bad habit. Also, I guess I haven’t before. Because we are actually the protagonists of our own story. Even you.” He peered deeply into my eyes to get his point across. I gave him a weak smile because I knew he wanted to cheer me up. But I didn’t need cheering up, I accepted that I wasn’t protagonist material. I accepted it a long time ago.

But he didn’t need to know that.

“You’re right. I’m being silly.”

“Oh c’mon, y/n. You’re not being silly. You’re an amazing person. Total main character material!” I raised my brow but said nothing. He knocked gently on my head. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”

So many things were going through my head. Including the fact that if I were main character material, I wouldn’t be sitting here with him right now. I’d be on some date with a cute guy. And then the whole situation would blow up in my face. And I would learn from it. And everyone would forgive me except maybe one or two people, but I would be ok with that because I learned from my mistakes and am a better person.

But that’s not me. I don’t make mistakes. I pick up the pieces of those who make mistakes. I fix them. I heal them. I’m the one who makes the main character realize they’re a shitty person.

“Too many things, Hyunjin. Too many things.” I whispered.

We said nothing for a while until he wrapped his arms around me.

“I hope your mom is ok.” I quietly said as I rested my head on his shoulder.

“Yeah, I hope so too. And I hope you realize your worth one day.”

------

‘she’s not sick!! the tests came back negative!! WOOO! party at my house... ok virutal party lol’ -hyunjin

I cheered alone in my room. The test results came back pretty quickly yet it seemed like forever ago when Hyunjin cried in my arms. And we ended up spending the whole day together after I vented my feelings to him. But that’s besides the point.

‘that’s awesome bro!!!! im so happy !!!!!!’

‘:) Thanks for being the best friend i have right now lol’ -hyunjin

I paused at the words ‘best friend’. I knew he didn’t mean best friend, but it still made me smile.

Honestly, it was pretty cool being friends with Hyunjin and I wished that we were closer friends sooner. I guess I didn’t want to get too close in case him and Ryujin broke up. I didn’t know I’d be comforting him and not her.

‘ofc. u deserve happiness hyunjin’

He didn’t respond for a couple of minutes which concerned me. He would usually tell me if he was busy, but he just left suddenly.

I tried not to think much about it so I set my phone on my table. I kept peering down at my phone every few minutes, but still nothing.

I pulled out a good book and started to read a few pages.

“y/n! I think your friend is here.”

I furrowed my brows and closed my book with a pink bookmark keeping my page.

“Friend? Didn’t know Ryujin was coming over.” I whispered. “Ok dad, I’ll be there!” I threw off blanket and opened the door. I shuffled to the front door and opened it. I ignored my dad’s weird looks as he made his way back to his room.

Once I opened the door, I saw not Ryujin, but Hyunjin.

His face was bright and I couldn’t help but smile back. His happiness was contagious, which is why he was so well-liked.

He finally fixed his hair that was getting long due to the quarantine, but it suit him. He wore gray shorts with a sweater on top.

I was suddenly aware of the gray shorts I had on.

“Hey, we’re matching.” I said lamely. He laughed with his eye smile which was his best look. “What are you doing here?”

“Wow, I’m hurt, no hello Hyunjin, I hear you come bearing good news.”

I laughed. “You texted me said good news.”

“I know, but I was wondering if you wanted to hang out right now...?” I crossed my arms and leaned against the door.

“Hyunjin, we aren’t supposed-”

“I know, I know, but I’m bored! I’m an only child too you know and I only live with my dad who hasn’t gone anywhere. And neither have I unless to see you. I know you follow the rules, so you’ve probably only seen Ryujin besides your immediate family.”

I hesitated, wondering if it was the right thing to do. My heart was saying yes, but my brain wasn’t sure.

“Just go, honey. Just be safe.” My dad’s voice boomed. I looked back and saw him giving a thumbs up.

“Really dad?” He nodded.

“Yes, but sure not to come in contact with any other people.”

I held my pinky up, and I noticed Hyunjin was holding his up too.

“Promise.”

------

The roads were so empty.

“You make me! Feel like I’m living a, TEENAGE DREAM!”

Hyunjin and I bumped to Katy Perry bops as we drove through a deserted city.

“Don’t ever look back! Don’t ever look back~”

“My heart stops!! When you look at me!” I sang.

“Just one touch, now baby I believe~” He playfully poked me.

“This! Is! Real! So take a chance and don’t ever look back~” I finished.

He turned down the volume as we reached our destination.

An empty parking lot.

“Aw, how romantic.” I joked.

“Sorry, not much places were open.” He gave me a small smile as he parked the car and rolled down the windows. We didn’t get out in case other people were around.

I unbuckled my seat belt and turned to him. He was already staring at me.

“I’m really, really happy about your mom,” I said finally. He smiled, I had never seen him this happy for almost a month now, ever since Ryujin cheated on him.

“Thank you. Also, thank you for being there when I needed you.”

I thought back to a few days ago when he was sobbing in my arms. I felt my heart shatter for him. I loved his mom too, she was always around when we were at school and was just a ball of light.

“It’s no problem.”

"Right, because you’re ‘a side character’.” He used quotation marks with his fingers to get the point across.

I rolled my eyes and pushed him. “Stop! It’s true though.”

He looked at me again, his eyes saying “explain”.

“Stop giving me that look. It’s completely obvious.”

“Tell me again, how is this obvious? Because, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but all of your thoughts are yours. You see things from YOUR eyes, your point of view, and whatever. Your life is your life; no one else is the main character y/n.”

I hated when he said my name so much. It reminded me too much of myself. I always made sure to use people’s names in sentences to show that I knew their name and to make them feel special. I knew what he was trying to do. I hated that it was working.

“Look, if I was the main character of my own story, then why would my only purpose right now to be helping yours and Ryujin’s?”

He flinched at my words.

“What?”

I sighed, feeling uncomfortable again when the topic was focused on me.

“You know what I mean. For months now, it feels like all I do is to help Ryujin’s character development. And maybe even yours. She’s the one who makes shitty decisions, I’m the one who fixes them for her. She says stupid things, and I’m the one who makes her apologize. She even gets accepted into Seoul University, leaving me behind. I just feel like everyone is accelerating and changing while I’m static! I’m the same as I was in freshman year, sophomore, junior and now senior. I’m the same person!”

Hyunjin stayed silent while I ranted. My chest rose and fell from my heavy breathing and my cheeks were dusted with pink.

“Also, if I wasn’t a side character, would I be here, hanging out with you, to help you get over my best friend cheating on you?”

He had no response for my words. And I knew he wouldn’t because he knew I was right. I was the push to get them back together. I was probably going to get a text or a call sometime by Ryujin while she begs for them to get back together. Or to ask me to fix this whole situation.

I was right.

“You really think I ask you to hang out so much because I want your help to get over Ryujin?”

His accusing tone shocked me, and it made me nervous.

I tried not to focus on the police cars passing by and calmed my nerves.

“Um... yeah, why...”

He wasn’t looking at me initially, like he was focusing on something outside of the car.

“Y/N, I ask you to hang out so much because I like hanging out with you.” He confessed.

At my lack of words, he kept going and ran his fingers through his hair.

“Just... this is hard to say... but I-I feel like I made a mistake dating Ryujin.” He blurted. This definitely got my attention.

“What??”

“Please let me finish.” The desperation in his eyes lulled me to listen.

“We were a good couple at first, but the chemistry wasn’t there. We never clicked. We didn’t talk about the same things and we could never have a deep conversation. Everything we talked about was so surface level or about her problems. She was fun to be with and a great girl while it lasted, but it wasn’t like when we hung out, even when I was still dating Ryu, we got along better.

We could talk about conspiracy theories and weird things in history like it was normal! You were always the first one I talked to when I read a new book or if I learned a cool fact. I could never do that with her and I hate that I just realized it after we broke up. And when I started to hang out with you.

It was always you all long, y/n. It was always you.”

What on earth was going on right now? This isn’t supposed to happen. I was supposed to fix this relationship-

“Ok, I see you’re kind of freaking out. And it’s freaking me out, please say something.”

My leg wasn’t even shaking, that’s how numb I was at this conversation.

“I-” my voice trailed off, like I couldn’t get the words out.

“I have a lot to think about. I’m sorry, I can’t... I-” Tears filled my eyes. I didn’t know what was going on. This stuff never happened to me. Am I supposed to give an answer right away? That’s impossible! I need to talk to Ryujin first and maybe my brother and then just ignore the whole situation.

“It’s fine, take as long as you need.”

The drive back was silent, contrary to what it was before. I regret not taking my own car. I regret even hanging out with him in the first place.

As soon as we got to my house, I got out.

“Thanks for the ride.” I mumbled, because I still had manners.

“Hey y/n.”

I paused and turned around, mortified of what he was to say next.

“I meant everything I said when I said it has always been you. I think.. I think if you think about our memories together, you’ll see that.

I just.. I just needed you to know that.”

I nodded slowly, unsure of what to say.

Then he was gone.

-------

My first reaction was to eat my pain away, but I couldn’t even finish my banana.

Ryujin would never forgive me for dating her ex boyfriend right? That’s girl code 101. Even if she did cheat on him. Or does that cancel out if she cheated?

I downed a cup of water in anger.

“Woah, slow down there, you don’t want to drown yourself.” I slammed the cup down and glared at my older brother.

“Chan, please. I’m not in the mood right now.” I tried stomping away from him, but he kept talking. Like always.

“Uh oh, is it because of your boy? I can beat him up if you want.” I felt my cheeks turn red.

“No! Don’t beat him up. And he’s not my boy. He’s Ryujin’s.” I muttered.

“Wooo what? That’s a plot twist! Dad said he was completely smitten with you though. And Dad’s usually never wrong about boys and their feelings. He’s a therapist you know-”

“I know who my father is, thank you very much! And, ugh, God, I can’t even.” I couldn’t even make it to my room before I collapsed on the floor.

In the blink of an eye, Chan was sitting next to me. “Woah there, okay, this is some teenage angst I don’t know how to deal with anymore.”

Anger rushed through my body at his words. And I’m not sure why.

“Shut up! I don’t have teen angst! I don’t have any problems, ok? Just Ryujin cheated on this guy. And now I don’t know what to do!”

Chan was silent for a moment, unusual for a person like him.

“What? What do you mean what do you do?”

“I mean, how do I fix it?”

Chan laughed. “Fix what?”

“Fix their problems, are you not understanding what is going on here?”

Chan stood up, then picked me up. I would usually struggle but he plopped my on the couch, so I was ok with him... for now.

“Y/n, it isn’t your job to fix other people’s problems. How about you focus on your own right now?”

I peered down at my hands, embarrass to tell him what was going on in my life. I felt like such a trader. I helped my friend her whole life and suddenly, I was catching feels for her ex-boyfriend.

I opened my mouth to speak, but I got cut off my a buzz in my pocket. Then I got like 10 more. I pulled my phone out and saw the texts from Ryujin.

‘i think i made a mistake’

‘i dont like jeongin that much anymore’

‘hes not a gentleman like hyunjin!! he doesnt even pull out my chair when i sit or open doors for me. plus jeongin is lowkey childish and he is always pulling pranks on me!’

‘tell me what 2 do?? how do i fix this?!!??!!?’

‘also my parents are fighting again and it’s sooooo irritating !!!!’

‘sos 911 aaahhhh’

“Who is it? What do they say?” Chan asked curiously. I shoved him away from reading my phone.

“They’re from Ryujin. She’s already regretting dating Jeongin. The guy she cheated with Hyunjin on.” I wasn’t sure the sentence made sense, but Chan would understand.

Chan’s eyes widened. “Damn, dick move.” I gritted my teeth.

“And now, she misses Hyunjin. She says Jeongin doesn’t compare to Hyunjin who is nice and a gentleman. And her parents are fighting again. I got to go help.” I stood up to grab my keys, but Chan stopped me.

“Tell me why you were upset earlier.”

His stern voice shook me.

“Y/n, tell me.”

Suddenly, my tears were unable to hide and fell freely onto my cheeks. Chan’s face didn’t soften, but he let go of my arm.

“Tell-”

“Fine! Hyunjin told me he liked me. And that he regretted ever dating Ryujin.”

I fell down on the couch while Chan held me close. He pet my head, like I did to Hyunjin earlier. I guess that was a good comforting tactic.

“And now, Ryujin wants him back. What am I supposed to do?” I whispered.

“Do you like him back?”

I paused.

Did I like him back? I wasn’t sure...

Chan patted my back and stood. “I’m gonna make us some lunch, sit here and think about it. And don’t you dare think about responding to those texts.”

Hwang Hyunjin.

We’ve been in school together since we were kids. We saw each other grow up. We were never close, but we wouldn’t be awkward if we were paired together in a project.

He was always nice to me. He would remember my name contrary to all the boys in our grade. I faded into the background, especially when I became friends with Ryujin in the sixth grade.

We were in acapella together and we were always in the same friend groups, especially when Ryujin and Hyunjin got closer.

Everyone would yell and shout at us if we started talking about a book we just read or conspiracy theory we saw online. Or when we were both contemplating being vegan when we saw a deer get hit by a truck.

He was the one who encouraged me to wear makeup even if Ryujin told me I was shit at it. He was the one who told me I could join acapella even if I was too shy to be on stage, because he was too. He was the one who dressed up as Harry Potter characters with me when no one else wanted to. He was the one I went to when I wanted to talk about the things I loved most.

He was the one... He was the one all along.

“Oh my god. It’s always been Hyunjin. Oh my god.”

Chan set down a crappy sandwich in front of me, but I was on a mission.

“You figure it out?”

“Yes, yes I did! But what do I tell Ryujin?”

Chan scoffed. “What do you tell Ryujin? She’s the one who cheated on him. And she’s always been a crappy friend to you.” I frowned. Ryujin wasn’t the best friend, but she was my best friend...

“If she’s truly your best friend, she’ll forgive you for this. So go, go get your manz.” I cringed at his language. He was not as young as he thought.

Then, I realized something.

I looked at Chan who was just sitting on the couch, cheering me on.

“Oh my god, you’re a side character in my story.”

The made him pause before he took a bit. “Uh, ok? Aren’t we all each other’s side characters? The protag will always be ourselves, dork. Now go!”

I ran out the door and checked my phone. Those can be dealt with later. Or right now. I’m not sure. Maybe at the same time.

I jumped in my car and called Ryujin and put her on speaker.

“Hello? Y/n?? Where have you been, I texted you like 20 minutes ago! I said SOS!”

“Am I your best friend?”

“W-what? Where is this coming from? Yes, of course you are-”

“Then you’ll forgive me for anything right?”

She paused.

“Maybe. I’m not sure, you’ve never really done anything wrong.”

I gulped. You can’t back down now.

“Is everything ok, y/n?”

“I have something to tell you. And you’re going to hate me for it.”

“What?”

There was silence.

“What, y/n, seriously-”

“I have feelings for Hyunjin!” I shouted.

Dead silence. I could hear the few cars driving in my neighborhood and kids laughing outside. The silence was terrifying.

“You what?”

“I have feelings for Hyunjin. Your ex-boyfriend.”

I heard shuffling on the other side.

“Y-you can’t. He’s my ex-boyfriend. That’s breaking girl code, and I am not over him. What the hell, y/n?”

I felt tears fall from my eyes. This is not how I wanted this to go. But this is what I expected.

“I’m sorry. But my whole life, I have been living for you. Ever since I met you. And this time, I have to do things for myself. I’m sorry but I- I want to be selfish and I want to make mistakes that you’re gonna have to decide if you forgive me for.

I want to be the main character of my story right now.”

“Y/n, wait-”

I hung up the phone. I couldn’t let her get in the way of me living for me. Even if it was selfish and bitchy. I need to make mistakes to grow. And I haven’t made many ground breaking mistakes in the past, but this one feels pretty good.

I parked outside of Hyunjin’s house and ran up the steps.

Before I could knock on my door, it opened revealing a disheveled Hyunjin.

“You came.”

I was shocked at his sudden appearance, but nodded.

“I did, um, how did you get to the door so quickly?”

“I was waiting.” A cute blush danced across his face.

How have I not seen him before? For how I truly feel about him?

For a minute, we didn’t know what to say.

“I-”

We laughed.

“You first,” he said.

I cleared my throat.

“Hyunjin, um, I’m not very good at speeches to declare my feelings. Most likely because I’ve suppressed them over the years and haven’t shown them to anybody.

I’m dumb and stupid and now I’m selfish because I don’t care what anyone thinks right now because I realized that I am falling in love with you.”

His eyes grew to the size of his hand at my words.

“What?”

I laughed nervously.

“Um, I was .. I was talking to my brother. And I just realized that every moment in my life that I was insecure or unsure of something, you helped me through it. And when I just wanted to talk about something nerdy like a book or a poem that made me cry, I wanted to talk to you.

It really has been you all along.” I whispered the last sentence, but I knew he heard it.

He took my hands and wrapped them around his waist.

“I’m falling in love with you too. I think I always have been a little, which sounds fucking up since I dated Ryujin. But I think we both knew we weren’t right for each other.”

I nodded, feeling safe in his embrace.

Then, I felt him hold my face and bent down to kiss me. His lips were soft and it felt like he was hesitant. Before I lost the courage, I pulled him closer. I could feel his smile across my lips.

He made my heart flutter like I was reading a cute romance novel.

Except I was in the romance novel now.

And I was the protagonist.

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softest-cinnamon-roll · 4 years

Note

“I don’t care what you say, The Nightmare Before Christmas works for Christmas and Halloween” with reddie please ^^

10. “I don’t care what you say, The Nightmare Before Christmas works for Christmas and Halloween”

* * * * *

It was Eddie’s workplace’s annual Christmas Party and once again Eddie wanted to be anywhere but where he was.

Currently, Eddie was squished between Monica from Accounts and Bradley from Sales as they spoke over him about New Year plans as though he wasn’t even there. It was always the same, Eddie was invited to these things, but only out of curtesy, nobody really wanted him there. They never did.

Even though it was a Christmas Party, the company he worked for always had some new underlying agenda going on as to justify the free drinks and fancy meal. This year, it was all about scoring a deal with the CEO of Tozier Industries, a high ranking and popular entertainment business. They dabbled in radio, television, film and news and it would be a great investment for their company to have them on their side.

“I can’t believe we threw an event for Mr Tozier and he didn’t even bother to show up,” Bradley scoffed. “I haven’t seen him anywhere around here, which is an absolute joke. I know that Mr Gray wants him to be a part of the company as it is great publicity, but this is absurd.”

Eddie held back the urge to speak up in Mr Tozier’s defence. Wentworth, the CEO, was a busy man Eddie could only imagine. Since it was Christmas he probably had plenty of other engagements to attend to over a measly Christmas Party. He knew, however, to keep his mouth shut as he would only be shut down anyway. It was pointless. He had no idea why he was even employed there, as no-one cared to listen to any one of his ideas, even if they were good ones.

Thankfully, the conversation moved away pretty quickly when Annabel from the front office elbowed Bradley in the side to shut him up. Monica giggled that high pitched fake laugh that she had before changing the subject. “What movie will we watch for the end of year movie night next week? I vote for Love Actually, it is such a classic Christmas Rom Com.”

Bradley groaned, rolling his eyes, “We watched that movie last year. This year it’s time for something different! Like Die Hard! It’s a great movie to watch at Christmas.”

Unable to hold back any longer, Eddie cleared his throat and spoke up, “What about the Night Before Christmas? It’s classic Christmas movie…”

The three co-workers all stopped and turned their attention to Eddie, narrowing their eyes a little. “Oh Eddie, we didn’t even see you there. When did you show up?” Monica laughed. “Anyway, that movie isn’t a Christmas Movie, it’s a Halloween movie. You should know that, Eddie.”

Bradley choked back a laugh and Eddie felt his cheeks flush red. He knew the movie could be watched at both Christmas and Halloween, but it was clear no matter what he said, the three assholes in front of him would only find another way to make his suggestion invalid.

Just as Eddie was about to turn around and go hide in the bathrooms for the remainder of the evening, someone stepped up behind him, staring at the three of his, still laughing, co-workers. “I don’t care what you say, The Nightmare Before Christmas works for Christmas and Halloween,” The male said, raising a challenging eyebrow at them, daring them to say anything.

Eddie turned his head to get a better look at the new arrival who was speaking in his defence and he swallowed thickly. The guy was dressed formally in a suit and tie, was a whole lot taller than Eddie with wild curly hair and thick framed glasses that perched on his nose. He was also standing next to Mr Gray, who was less than impressed, as always.

“May I introduce you to Richard Tozier, Wentworth’s son. Went couldn’t make it this evening so his son has come in his place in order to discuss a possible contract.” Mr Gray announced and Bradley’s face went sour, followed by bright red in embarrassment. Eddie held back a giggle. “Richard this is Bradley, Monica and Annabel, they are all very important members of my team and they are looking forward to possibly creating an agreement with your company.”

The smile that was on Eddie’s face disappeared as Mr Gray ignored the fact that he was present and Bradley smirked, moving to the side and blocking Eddie out of their circle. He sighed, looking for the nearest exit in the hopes of making a quiet escape, but a voice cut him off.

“And who is this?” Richard asked, his eyes meeting Eddie’s as he turned around. “I want to know the name of the cutie that agrees with me on when it’s appropriate to watch The Nightmare Before Christmas.”

From behind him, Eddie could see the glares of the three co-workers as all the attention was now focused on him. Mr Gray cleared his throat and ushered Eddie forward, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, sending an uncomfortable shiver down his spin. “This is Edward. He works…where do you work again Eddie?”

“Risks,” Eddie whispered. Eddie was one of the company’s risk analysts, even though he felt he would be much more suited in handling events and meetings. He was good at that, communications was what he was qualified to do! “I work in risks.”

Richie raised an eyebrow and Eddie felt a blush form on his cheeks. The words that Richie had used earlier to describe him only just registering in his mind. He had called him cute. “Well Eddie from Risks. What do you think of my company creating a relationship with Gray Enterprises?”

In all honesty, Eddie wanted to scream at Richie to run for the hills and never look back. He wanted to tell him that joining the company would be a terrible investment and that he should focus on more local companies that would bring him better revenue. However, everyone staring at him, including his boss, Eddie knew he had to lie. If he didn’t, he’d be fired on the spot.

“I think it’s a great idea,” he smiled. “If you’ll excuse me, I have a headache coming on so I think I’ll retire for the night.” Eddie took a step back, not missing the disappointed look on Richie’s face. From where he was standing, he noticed Richie’ pull something out of his pocket, scribbling on it with a marker. If he could, Eddie would have stayed just for him, but he couldn’t bare to be in the presence of his asshole coworkers for another second. It wasn’t like he would ever see Richie again, as everyone would make it their personal mission to keep them far away from one another.

Before he could get far though, Richie stepped forward and reached out and shook Eddie’s hand, slipping whatever he had been scribbling on into his palm. He winked at Eddie, “Lovely to meet you, Eddie. I hope we’ll see each other again soon.”

Eddie swallowed, heat pooling in his stomach at Richie’s intense, yet intriguing stare. He let go of his hand, stuffing the piece of paper into his pocket and heading out of the building into the cold night. It wasn’t until Eddie was in the cab on the way home that he looked at what Richie had handed him.

I’d like to see you again, off the record this time. Call/Text me - 212-470-2271.

* * * * *

@richietoaster @tozier-boy @eds-trashmouth @bitchbrak @sloppybitchreddie @its-stranger-than-you-think @maximusfraker @jem-carstairs-is-perfection @thejadeazalea @halfway-happy353 @tinyarmedtrex @inthebreadbinwrites @kat-ships-everything @takeourpure @lo-v-ers @that-weird-girls-blog @studpuffin @s-s-georgie @reddie-for-anything @trashmouthtozierr @richietoizer @girasol-eddie @bi-bi-richie @honeybeehanlon @mars-14 @reddiesetandgo @marsisaplanetyall @xandertheundead @sedanleystanley @hawkinsbabe @beepbeeprichiellc @stellarbisexual @oldguybones @stanleuyris @eduardoandale @purplepoisonedgem @reddie-to-cryy @pink-psychic @violetreddie @toziesque @queen-sock @appojoos @moonlightrichie @rreddies @disneyfan567 @annxmatron @lifesucksheres20bucks @anellope @roobarrtrashmouth @are-you-reddie-for-it @callmechee @nancynwheeler @reddieforlove @twoidiotsinl0ve @madi-artist @tozierking @s-onora @atownofeggs @wilding-throught-thehallways @no-she-wasnt-reddie @dadbodrichie @thorn-harvester-ven @eddiekasbpark @sparklingrainbowdragon @ransonelovebot @gloire-celeste @derrylosers @3tothe1

#reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #writing tag #festive prompts

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dojae-huh · 3 years

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I'm an NCT fan from 2016, right after their debut with 7thsense and Without you. They peaked my interest but I wasnt a fan until DY's first Without you focus fancam, his energy while performing this song was just amazing and his voice really suit my taste, I believe a lot of his fans since that time start off just like me. It was really random that I saw JaeDo dancing mirrorly in 7thsense and thought "these 2 looks like they might be a nice couple". Then I started my researched phased by watching SMR videos with DY in it and Showchampion, of course, and the random thought I had before like a small seed planted in my mind just grow into a whole big tree in a few days lol, their flirting game was too strong for my expectation. The materials to shipping them was just plenty, all the fanaccs from SMR shows sounds unreal, NCT on Air, NCTLife was also a big help. But I was just shipping them for fun and had this impression that they were doing all these as fanservice (but not like they were forced to do it) like typical SM idols (with how SM used to produce movies based on fanfiction and made their idols act out scenes in it this is pretty beginners level), they wasn't hiding anything, a bit show off even, stick together almost all the time on or of screen, describe their date with romantic implied, and some of the moments like the "ah gay ah" or the couple clothes stylists had for them on NCTLife in BK were pretty too in-your-face, made me only think that they were the chosen ship, and looked nice together. Now looking back at it I realize it was really more than just fanservice, since they don't behave like that with anyone else. In 2017 I thought they had a fall out, not being close like attact to the hip as before anymore, rarely interacted. Many people thought they had enough of each other since they said they argued a lot, funny how this and their competitiveness might be also a factor that made "enemy to lovers" a popular trope during shippers back then. Eventually I lost hope and started to shift my attention to DoTae for a while. But still I was really confused at that time, bc DY was clearly avoiding JH but JH still obviously fond of him, like knowing every little things about DY, trying to touch him sometimes , constantly teasing him (the star blossom reaction vid was top notch), it didn't take me to read body language and behaviours to notice. Still I didn't know what was all that about lol. 2018 was truly a bless since they stop that ignoring each other's existence thing and start openly interact again, but I could tell they're not the same as 2015-6. I stumble on your post on AO3 in 2018 and after reading it I had to agree with almost everything. My confusion about Jaehyun's attitude now made perfect sense, there's no doubt about his feelings for DY anymore. I was a bit skeptical on DY's part though, maybe because the scenario they're dating and everyone around them being accepting easily sound too good to be true, but as 2018 progress and new developments in 2019 the picture come clear more and more and I was so happy. What makes JaeDo appealling to me are those little but very telling moments that you need to pay attention to them a bit more to notice. Also I feel like they're meant for each other, a perfect match, they can help each other grow better in both their career and personality. What still left me confused is how up and down they are with the showing/hiding and SM's attitude towards them, but it's not really a big deal, any new moments from them erase my doubt completely.

As someone who has watching them since debut me and all my friends was very surprised when we saw people make DoWoo a big thing. To me the way he treats JW is no different from other dongsaengs. Jaehyun is the only dongsaeng he treats almost like his equal, and people often not notice that since Jaehyun seems more mature than his age I guess.

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mattelektras · 4 years

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Yo bich you see bop yet? I wanna know ur thoughts

I HAVE n i got thoughts a plenty

GOOOOOOOOOOOD

the soundtrack has me losing my fucking mind???? diamonds???? that slowed down hit me w your best shot????? a chef kiss does not do it justice

COSTUMES...... all of harley’s looks were so mismatched and colourful and fun and holy shit ms lance kick me in the face w those gold boots and bellbottoms. even black mask and co’s???? gaudy ass shirts are in fact the way to be a good villain

all of the women had their own backstory completely separate from one another and they all had their motivations which is SO RARE in a team movie. you usually just get one main character with a plot and the rest of them just work around that

fucked up and they deserved to die the way they did but gay sionis and zsaz was a whole experience in itself

u kind of got a glimpse of the gotham rogues dynamic too which is what i feel like ALL batman movies have been missing. like harley going to black mask’s club, mask hanging w zsaz, mentioning being arrested by batman like it’s a tuesday, the police finding harley’s necklace and being like well fuck theyve broken up again because that just happens every 5 minutes in this shithole

im so glad they fought so hard for the higher age rating like women swearing every other word and being vulgar and kicking teeth out of people’s heads is just a good time for me

but that being said it wasnt all gimmicky and jokey like. these women all banding together to protect a young girl, the scene at the club witht he woman dancing on the table and dinah just having to stand there and watch having previously sung this is a man’s world was so fucking. idk chilling??? is that the word im looking for??? it was such an uncomfortable scene to watch and thats the point of it

dinah was really the heart of the movie for me like. i feel like there wouldve been some value in it being told from dinah’s point of view but i get why they did it how they did. but yeah. dinah’s the star for me

lesbian renee!!!!!!! her plot in the story was so much more than i thought it would be. dealing w men taking credit for her work. have to work with an ex whilst trying to keep her priorities straight. seeing that maybe the law isnt where she belongs

when harley was tied up by black mask and got backhanded and showed like. no emotion whatsoever and spaced out into whatever that was. like. u get the vibe she’s used to that kind of thing and this whole movie really does make you feel for her and see for a fact that the joker is a piece of shit. and seeing harley try so hard to move away from him is so MUCH

HARLEY’S SCENE IN THE POLICE PRECINCT.... W HER DUMBASS WEAPONS AND PINK AND BLUE SMOKE...... MWAH

i do still have issues like it wasnt perfect in regards to a lot of things like. i still think white helena was unnecessary and regressive. i like how accurate her story was in terms of the comics but theres no reason why we had to go back years and have her be white

cass..... was just not there like i dont know who that girl was but she wasnt cass. she was a good character i enjoyed her parts of the story but there was literally nothing about her apart from being asian and a young girl that she had in common with cass. her disability was gone, she had none of her skills, her parentage wasnt even alluded to. she was a criminal!!!!! cass’ thing has always been that despite what she’s been forced to do she is a good person through and through and has bruce’s black and white mentality

BUT ANYWAY. i loved it i had fun. you can really tell that margot and co put so much love into this movie and into harley’s character and they worked so hard to make it was they envisioned

and we all know damn fuckin well if it had deadpool on the posters the box office wouldve been very different

#anonymous #q & a

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fandom-madnessess · 5 years

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Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood ❆ Rating: G, Word Count: 1751 ❆ Human AU, Single Parent Magnus, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Christmas Cookies, Holidays

For @gingerangelofthursday for the @bytheangeldaily Holiday Gift Exchange. I hope you like it, and have an amazing 2019! ♥

‘Brought the flour you asked,’ Alec says as he steps into the kitchen. He looks and smells cold and windswept, his cheeks and nose red. Snowflakes are melting in his hair.

Magnus is always happy to see his downstairs neighbour, but right now he’s most excited about the bag of flour Alec is carrying under his arm. ‘Thank you.’ Magnus takes the bag and immediately starts measuring out what he needs.

‘Hi, Alec,’ Madzie says a little distractedly. She’s sitting at the kitchen island, a huge sheet of cookie dough rolled out in front of her. She’s carefully cutting out shapes with an assortment of cookie cutters.

‘What are you guys making?’

Magnus vaguely registers the rustling of Alec taking off his coat and the scraping of chair legs as Alec sits down next to Madzie.

‘Cookies,’ Madzie says like it should be obvious.

Alec huffs out a laugh. ‘I can see that. But what for? And why this many? Are you and your dad going to eat nothing but cookies this Christmas?’

‘They’re for school, so children who don’t have money can have a nice Christmas.’

‘Charity bake sale,’ Magnus adds.

‘Ah. Do you need any help?’

Magnus can’t help but smile at Madzie’s narrowed eyes as she looks at Alec, then glances at her dad. Can she trust Alec with this? They’ve both tasted some of his cooking before and it wasn’t… great. Slowly, she hands him a Christmas tree cookie cutter.

‘You can use this one.’

‘Thank you.’ Alec glances at Magnus, eyebrows raised. Magnus quickly goes back to his dough.

They find a rhythm. Magnus makes the dough, Alec helps Madzie cut out the shapes—under Madzie’s strict supervision—and then Magnus puts the cookies in the oven. After a couple hours they have about a hundred cookies in all shapes and sizes. There are quite a few Christmas trees and Santas, but Madzie wanted everyone to have a special cookie, so there are dreidels and snowmen, and a couple other shapes that Magnus can’t really define but he’s sure his daughter has a plan for.

‘Shouldn’t we decorate them?’ Alec asks, already going for the glazing and sprinkles.

‘No!’ Madzie shouts and latches onto his outstretched arm. ‘We have to let them cool down first.’

Alec presses his lips together in a barely suppressed smile and winks at Magnus. Magnus quickly looks away, so he doesn’t betray Alec with a smile of his own.

‘Well, what should we do in the meantime?’ Alec asks Madzie, easily turning her grip on his arm into them holding hands, and follows her to the living room.

‘Can we watch a movie?’

‘Sure, but maybe let Alec pick this time, sweetpea.’

‘I pick Princess and the Frog,’ Alec says.

Madzie marches triumphantly to the television.

‘You really shouldn’t give in to her so easily,’ Magnus sighs.

‘I know, but it’s hard to say no to those pigtails.’

Magnus snorts. ‘She had you wrapped around her little finger from the first time you met.’

‘True,’ Alec chuckles. He shrugs. ‘I don’t mind. So far, she’s never abused her powers.’

‘Are you sure?’ Magnus nods to where the Disney logo is appearing on the screen.

‘It’s an amazing movie,’ Alec protests.

‘Well, while you two are going to watch your amazing movie, I’m going to clean up the kitchen,’ Magnus says, pouting. ‘All on my own. With no one to help me.’

‘Make sure to clean up yourself a little, too,’ Alec teases. Then his hand is cradling Magnus’ cheek and his thumb swipes across Magnus’ cheekbone. Heat gathers where Alec’s palm is warm against his skin, then spreads through his entire body. Magnus forgets to breath for a second. ‘You’re covered in flour.’

When Alec removes his hand Magnus barely resists the urge to chase after that warm pressure.

The kitchen isn’t too big of a mess, but he does need to make room for the decorating. After a quick stop in the bathroom to wash his face, and a change of shirt, he joins Madzie and Alec on the couch.

‘We ordered Chinese,’ Alec tells him. ‘With extra spring rolls for you. For cleaning the kitchen.’ He turns his head and throws Magnus a beatific smile.

‘Thanks. And–‘

‘Shhh!’ Madzie glares at them both, then focusses back on the movie.

Magnus raises his eyebrows and catches Alec’s eye, then quickly looks away before he bursts out laughing.

They have dinner in front of the TV. The movie ends and Madzie drags them back to the kitchen to decorate the cookies. She gives them very specific instructions for how each is to be decorated, then stage whispers to Magnus to keep a close eye on Alec. Alec throws Magnus an affronted look when Madzie can’t see him, but Magnus supports his daughter on this one. Alec needs to be watched when it comes to preparing any kind of food, since, according to Madzie, he can even mess up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

‘Are you going to helps sell the cookies?’ Madzie asks, looking up from the snowman she’s decorating and turning to Alec.

‘I don’t think I’m allowed.’ At Madzie’s confused frown Alec explains, ‘I’m not a parent or family.’

‘Oh.’

‘Although, I could always pretend to be your dad’s boyfriend. You think that’ll get me in?’

Madzie turns with shining eyes to Magnus, silently pleading, but there’s something else there, too. Something that means she’s plotting.

‘Sure,’ Magnus says. ‘Alec can pretend to be my boyfriend to help sell the cookies.’

‘Yesss,’ Madzie grins, casts another look between the two men, and goes back to decorating.

Magnus can’t remember the last time he had this much fun, or felt so completely at peace. He doesn’t want the night to ever end, but Madzie has school the next day, which means she has to go to bed on time.

He sends her off to put on her pyjamas and brush her teeth, while he and Alec clean up all the spilled glazing and sprinkles. She’s barely in the hallway when she turns around and fixes both men with her gaze.

‘You can each have one cookie tonight,’ she says. ‘Just one.’

‘Thank you,’ Alec says, a serious look on her face.

‘We’ll only take one each,’ Magnus promises.

Madzie nods and continues on her way.

‘She’ll count them tomorrow, won’t she?’ Alec asks.

‘Oh, definitely,’ Magnus says. ‘She’ll get up extra early to make sure she has the time to count them twice.’

Alec chuckles, and starts loading the dishwasher.

‘She’s a great kid, Magnus.’

‘I know.’

‘She’s lucky to have you.’

‘Thank you.’ It’s barely more than a whisper, and it’s a struggle to get the words past the lump in his throat.

Madzie calls for Magnus when she’s ready for bed, and when he walks in, she’s already lying under the covers, the book she’s going to read by her flashlight barely tucked under her pillow. Magnus pretends he doesn’t see it. He’ll check on her in an hour.

‘Daddy,’ Madzie starts the second he walks into the room.

‘Yes, sweetpea?’

‘What if you asked Alec to really be your boyfriend? Then he wouldn’t have to pretend to come to the bake sale.’

‘Madzie…’

She sits up. ‘You smile more when he’s here. And he smiles when he looks at you.’

Magnus sits down on the edge of the mattress with a sigh. ‘Well, we’re friends. We like spending time together.’

Madzie looks unimpressed. ‘He’s here all the time. He’s come over every day this week.’

‘Well…’ Magnus has no idea what to say. He’s getting called out on his crush by his own daughter. ‘What if it doesn’t work out?’

‘It will.’

‘And you would be okay with that? With me dating Alec?’

‘I wouldn’t say it if I wasn’t.’ Madzie’s expression goes a little sad. ‘You should be happy, daddy. You’re always happy when we’re hanging out with Alec.’

For the second time that night, there’s a lump stuck in Magnus’ throat. He pulls Madzie into a hug and presses a kiss to the top of her head.

‘You are wise beyond your years, sweetpea.’

‘I am the best at English and Maths,’ Madzie reminds him.

‘I know. I saw your report cart.’ Magnus lets her back down and tucks her in. ‘You brush your teeth?’

‘Yes.’ There are very few things that Magnus’ loves more than the exasperated tone his daughter uses when she says this.

He presses one more kiss to her forehead, and makes sure she’s tucked in tight. ‘Good night, sweetpea.’

‘Good night.’

Magnus turns off the light and closes her door. He hears the snick of the flashlight turning on before he’s taken a step.

‘What are you thinking about?’

Magnus blinks. He’s sitting next to Alec on the couch, wine glass in one hand, a cookie in the other. He’d been so lost in thought about what Madzie had said, that he hadn’t realized he’d sat down, or even come back to the living room. He shakes his head and throws Alec a small smile.

‘Nothing.’

Alec raises an eyebrow. ‘You haven’t said a word since you came back from saying good night to Madzie. Is everything okay?’

‘Everything is fine. It’s just…’ Magnus looks at Alec. He really looks, and what he sees is that Alec is perfectly at home here. He doesn’t behave like a guest; helping with the washing up without being asked, ordering food, pouring drinks for the two of them. He even has his own key. ‘It’s just something Madzie says.’

Alec doesn’t say anything, just waits for Magnus to continue.

‘She says that I smile more when you’re here. And that you smile whenever you look at me.’

A blush creeps up Alec’s cheeks, but he doesn’t look away. Instead, he smiles and says, ‘You give me plenty of reason to smile.’

Magnus feels the heat creeping into his own cheeks, but he doesn’t look away either. ‘She also said I should ask you to really be my boyfriend.’

‘Well, we wouldn’t have to lie to the other parents and teachers tomorrow.’

‘Is that a yes?’ Magnus’ heart hammers in his chest, full of hope.

‘We haven’t even gone on a date yet.’

‘Do you need a date?’

Alec shakes his head, leaning in, giving Magnus plenty of time to pull back. ‘No,’ he whispers into the space between them.

Magnus closes the distance. Alec tastes of sugar and wine. And it’s perfect.

#malec #gingerangelofthursday #shadowhunters #btadholidayexchange2018 #sh fic #my fic #my tsc

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thelifetimechannel · 6 years

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#tlcstuck #roxy lalonde #jade harley #walkaround 3

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destinyc1020 · 2 years

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“Z seemed to be enamoured with JE” i am offended solely because i am a shipper and i don’t think rationally when it comes to the “others” lol BUT NAH i cannot accept that she’s “enamored” with him. She dated him tho and that’s a fact and maybe clung to him while hurting over a breakup with the actual love of her life. It happens. Of course she’d do all those couply shit with that ratface (im very very very sorry) because z is a decent person and would not treat him harshly?? she chose to date him and that’s a fact. Of course at first she’d be enjoying herself?? I’d do the same with a rebound. BUT pretty sure when she had time to truly reflect on things, she realized her heart wasnt truly in it. I still believe she’s the one who broke it off with him when she realized how she’s not truly in love with him (added to the other factors like how pretentious he is and all the horrible rumors…kidding! idk him personally to say anything haha) ANYWAY! can’t change the past, can’t erase those pictures seared into my brain, but the wonderful thing about the past is how i can compare it to what i’m witnessing now. And yes, Tom is indeed the love of her life, and I said what I said no matter how delusional I sound to non-shippers.

Yea, it's so obvious she loved Tom more than she loved JE. I don't even know why that's even a question at this point lol. The signs have been there since 2019 honestly. Who goes and gives their ex or soon-to-be ex a keyhole neck chain with some secret picture or message inside of it right before (or after) they've split up?? 🥴

Who goes and wear's their ex's shirt after they've split up the night of their movie premiere?

Who almost slips up and says "cuddling with my boyfriend" on the red carpet when talking about her "perfect day"? And let's not even go into all of the other signs that there were still feelings between them after Tom and Olivia were spotted together.

Honestly, the signs were still there that they both loved each other even after they split up. It's not just a crack theory. There were plenty of signs that us fans who followed them closely even after their breakup picked up on.

Z was doing what any normal woman would do after a breakup. She moved on and dated another guy. 🤷 And if our suspicions are true (perhaps Tom initiated the breakup), then it's no wonder that she would move on to start dating JE as soon as she saw Tom spotted with Olivia. Knowing JE he probably saw the pictures and swooped in and made his move. 🤷

She definitely had an attraction to JE, and liked his company (otherwise she wouldn't have dated him in the first place), but do I think she was in love with him like she was in love with Tom? No way lol 😅🤣

Even Momma Claire knew that lol, "Jacob WHO??" 😅🤣

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bonickhausen · 6 years

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do ALL THE NUMBERS ::::)

uh… there’s like… a hundred of them…

but sure, let’s go!

The meaning behind my url: bonickhausen was an architect. google “bonickhausen dit eiffel“.

A picture of me: plenty of pictures of me all over my blog.

How many tattoos i have and what they are: none

Last time i cried and why: a few days ago. onions.

Piercings i have: none.

Favorite band: probably boards of canada or nine inch nails.

Biggest turn offs: probably piercings.

Top 5 (insert subject): top 5 things to remember

drink water

homestuck is trash

grass grows

you look great today

you can change yourself if you’re not happy with who you are.

Tattoos i want: two parallel lines running through my right arm.

Biggest turn ons: glasses.

Age: 23

Ideas of a perfect date: mountainside camping. bonus points for a starry night.

Life goal: make games until the day i die and inspire others to do the same.

Piercings i want: none.

Relationship status: single.

Favorite movie: city of god.

A fact about my life: i used to think i wasnt fit for art. oh how wrong i was.

Phobia: monophobia. also, cockroaches.

Middle name: abreu.

Height: 1,76cm.

Are you a virgin? no

What’s your shoe size? brazilian 42

What’s your sexual orientation? het

Do you smoke, drink, or take any drugs? no smoking/drugs, drinking is okay as long as it doesnt taste like shit.

Someone you miss: eh.

What’s one thing you regret? punching that one kid back when i was ten

First celebrity you think of when someone says attractive: gillian anderson

Favorite ice cream? strawberry

One insecurity: my nose is too big. i dont like that.

What my last text message says: “o dos canudinhos de chocolate”

Have you ever taken a picture naked? y

Have you ever painted your room? ye

Have you ever kissed a member of the same sex? no

Have you ever slept naked? yes

Have you ever danced in front of your mirror? yes

Have you ever had a crush? yea

Have you ever been dumped? no

Have you ever stole money from a friend? no

Have you ever gotten in a car with people you just met? yes

Have you ever been in a fist fight? yeah when i was ten lol

Have you ever snuck out of your house? yes

Have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back? yea

Have you ever been arrested? no

Have you ever made out with a stranger? yes

Have you ever met up with a member of the opposite sex somewhere? yea

Have you ever left your house without telling your parents? yes

Have you ever had a crush on your neighbor? no

Have you ever ditched school to do something more fun? all the time

Have you ever slept in a bed with a member of the same sex? no

Have you ever seen someone die? sadly, yes

Have you ever been on a plane? no

Have you ever kissed a picture? no lol das dumb

Have you ever slept in until 3? til three? fucking weaklings

Have you ever love someone or miss someone right now? yeah, fuck that shit though.

Have you ever laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by? yes.

Have you ever made a snow angel? nope. no snow in here.

Have you ever played dress up? no

Have you ever cheated while playing a game? yes

Have you ever been lonely? haven’t we all felt lonely at one point or another?

Have you ever fallen asleep at work/school? all the time

Have you ever been to a club? yes

Have you ever felt an earthquake? no

Have you ever touched a snake? once

Have you ever ran a red light? no

Have you ever been suspended from school? yes

Have you ever had detention? yes

Have you ever been in a car accident? sorta

Have you ever hated the way you look? yeah

Have you ever witnessed a crime? yes.

Have you ever pole danced? nop

Have you ever been lost? yeah.

Have you ever been to the opposite side of the country? nah.

Have you ever felt like dying? yep.

Have you ever cried yourself to sleep? yup.

Have you ever sang karaoke? hell yeah.

Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t? multiple times. no regrets.

Have you ever laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? once. it sucked.

Have you ever kissed in the rain? yes

Have you ever sang in the shower? yeah

Have you ever made out in a park? ye

Have you ever dream that you married someone? yupper

Have you ever glued your hand to something? yap

Have you ever got your tongue stuck to a flag pole? lol no thats dumb

Have you ever ever gone to school partially naked? what the fuck

Have you ever been a cheerleader? no

Have you ever sat on a roof top? yeah

Have you ever brush your teeth? ….what the fuck? yes of course i have what kind of question is this?

Have you ever ever too scared to watch scary movies alone? yep

Have you ever played chicken? ye

Have you ever been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? once. it was horrible as i didnt know how to swim (still dont know)

Have you ever been told you’re hot by a complete stranger? yes

Have you ever broken a bone? yes

Have you ever been easily amused? yes

Have you ever laughed so hard you cried? all the time

Have you ever mooned/flashed someone? nope

Have you ever cheated on a test? no

Have you ever forgotten someone’s name? all the time.

Have you ever met someone who didn’t seem real? uh i dont think so?

Give us one thing about you that no one knows: im not wearing pants right now.

#personal

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collectionofdestiel · 6 years

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Silver Ring

“Dean?” A small voice called out through the darkness. There was no sound thrown back at him, no echo or reply. All that clouded his vision and thoughts were silence. An impending silence that caged his heart and froze his fingertips.

“Please, Dean, come back.” The words he were speaking weren’t coming from his mouth, his lips werent moving. But it was his voice, his voice laced in a distant memory. For the first time since Castiel had laid his eyes on Dean Winchester, he was numb.

“Dean, we can work this out. Don’t walk out that door.” Again his voice crackled through the darkness in heartbroken static. He didnt know where he was, how he had gotten here, but he did know that he was dying.

“Please.” This time his voice was softer, more crackled and weak. Like the last word spoken from a soul that was giving up.

“Dean.” Castiel closed his eyes, or tried to only to be met with the same darkness surrounding him.

For a split second he thought he saw a spark of green, felt the comfort of a familiar heartbeat, before he heard his savior whisper, “Cas”, and then even the darkness faded away.

“Mornin’.” Dean spoke leisurely as he strolled into the kitchen of the bunker. The mask he had perfected over a lifetime of misery fit perfectly across his aging features. “We gotta hunt?”

Sam didnt move. He didn’t set down his paper or even pretend to acknowledge his brother. Instead he sipped at his coffee and kept his eyes low.

Shrugging, Dean poured himself a cup of breakfast and took a seat across from his younger brother. The lack of sleep and trace of tears were clouding his vision and making pretending everything was okay almost impossible for him. But he bit it back. He bit back all the longing and heartbreak and guilt and misery. Just like he always has.

“I’m thinking about taking a trip to see Jody and the kiddos.” Roughness lined his voice as Dean eyed his brother carefully. “Get outta the bunker and get some fresh air.”

“Don’t.” Sam’s voice was dangerously low, catching Dean offguard. “Don’t sit there and talk to me like it’s another day. You know what you did.”

“Sammy-”

Sam slammed his mug onto the table, coffee spraying as the glass shattered. “Dont, Dean!”

Both brothers stared at each other, neither quite knowing where this was going. For a long couple minutes they both seemed to communicate the disaster that was filling the air of the bunker.

Finally Dean broke. “I had to do it.”

Shaking his head, Sam chuckled darkly. “No, asshole, you didn’t.”

“It’s over! It should have never started!” All the rage and sadness finally broke through the surface of Dean’s facade. Shooting up from his chair Dean paced the kitchen with his face in his hands. “He doesnt love me, Sam! Hell, i mean, maybe before there was a shot that he did but you know what he’s been doing! Disappearing all the time! Barely speaking to me let alone touching me! For fuck’s sake what was a i supposed to do? Let him end it! Wait around like some… like some lovestruck puppy that got kicked in the face?”

Taking a deep breath, Sam stood from his seat. He didnt speak until Dean caught his eyes. “He wasnt cheating on you. And he sure as hell didn’t fall out of love with you.”

“Then what, huh?” Voice cracking, Dean felt the tears start to surface, felt the bile build in the back of his throat. “Then why wasn’t he loving me?”

“He bought a ring.” Sam didn’t want to say it, to let the secret he was entrusted with slip, but he couldn’t stand to see this unfold. He knew that the two of them were stubborn and shitty at showing how much they truly cared. “He was nervous, had doubts, was trying to work up the nerve to ask you.”

“What?” Dean’s chest started to inflate until he thought he would burst. Looking into his brother’s eyes he saw only the truth. “He bought a ring?”

Nodding, Sam peered down at his destroyed mug. “Couple months ago.”

Staring at nothing in particular, Dean traced back when his boyfriend had started to grow distant. He started to analyze every exchange they had. “Fuck.” The word left his lips in a breath. “Fuck!” His feet carried him before his mind quite caught up.

Sam shook his head and started for the paper towels. He prayed it wasn’t too late.

The darkness subsided as the hours passed. Upon opening his eyes he was greeted with the ceiling of a motel room. Not any ceiling, but the ceiling he saw after the first night he made love to Dean. It was stained, beat down, and almost ironically ruined.

Breathing came back to him a while after that. Stale air, oxygen he didn’t want to inhale. Of all the movies and pop culture references of heartbreak he had learned over the years, Cas wasn’t prepared for this. He wasn’t prepared for the way his whole world was suddenly meaningless. As if he had jumped off of life and was standing still somewhere outside of time.

Maybe someday he would get up. Maybe someday he wouldn’t open his eyes and forget that Dean Winchester would never be sleeping on the pillow beside him. Maybe… but not today.

Today he planned on simply existing. Even that seemed like a chore but it was the bare minimum he could accomplish. Maybe he would go back to heaven, maybe he would walk the earth. The more maybes he conjured up the more tears ate at his eyes.

What was that one saying? “There are plenty of ways to die, but only love can kill you and keep you alive to feel it”? Was that how it went? Castiel thought it was just in this moment. He felt dead, he felt as though his life stopped, and yet he was still blinking away the hell that the hole in his heart left for him.

“CAS?!” Dean’s raw voice pierced through the chilled evening. It had been weeks since he walked out on his angel, weeks since he had been searching and clawing at hints to find him and bring him home.

“Cas! Please, sweetheart!” The tears had dried up a while ago, only leaving him with empty sobs. Defeat was starting to rip at his heart.

His mouth couldn’t stand to open anymore. Dropping to his knees, Dean succumbed to the darkness.

Castiel was walking about the motel room now, picking things up before dropping them. There was no weight to anything anymore. For a while it seemed that life had lost its dimensions.

Then it came. Something he hadn’t heard in so long he almost forgot to listen for it. A prayer.

“Please, Cas, I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I need you. I was stupid and fucking wrong and, shit, I can’t believe that I did this. I didn’t know… about the ring. I thought that you were separating from me because you didn’t want me anymore.” Even in Dean’s head his voice was hoarse. “I mean, you’re a perfect angel, always have been and always will be, and i know that I need to work on my self confidence but when you started to get distant I freaked out. I freaked out because the thought of you breaking up with me… it destroyed every good thing I had built for myself. I’m sorry, Cas. Please. Please come home.”

Castiel’s eyes widened as the prayer dissolved. The ring was warm from its place in his breast pocket. Still there, after all this time. Taking a deep breath, Castiel closed his eyes and pictured the only home he had ever had.

The sound of fluttering wings only made Dean pinch his eyes tighter shut. From his position curled under a mountain of blankets in his bed, he had been going crazy over the idea of Cas coming back to him. For hours he has heard that sound and looked up onto to see nothing. As if his mind wanted to torture him.

The stillness in the room only made breathing under the blankets more unbearable. But he didn’t plan on moving. He would continue his search for his angel later. Maybe they just needed some time. Dean kept repeating that line, over and over until it hurt his head. He couldn’t believe that it was over. Not yet. Not until he scoured the earth.

“I bought the silver band.” Cas’ rough voice made Dean tense up completely. “They kept trying to push gold on me. They kept repeating that that was what a wedding band should look like for a man. I didn’t tell them then that I wasnt buying a ring for just a man. I was buying a ring for a hero, a hunter, my Dean. I bought the silver because it suited you. I had sigils etched around the inside, all of which are enochian. Their meaning is that I, alone, will always watch over you. I, alone, will be there through all the horrors and joys and never leave your side.

“It didn’t occur to me when I had those etched that I would go back on that promise before I even gifted you the ring.” The bed dipped as Castiel let a sigh slip. “I should have stayed. I should have made you listen to me when you left. But I thought that I had failed you. I didn’t know that you were so upset about my distance, I didn’t even quite realize I was so distant. I had planning to do, people to contact. I traveled to Heaven and asked Bobby his permission to marry you. I called Jody and Garth. I was so busy planning, taking all the steps to ask you to be mine, that I lost track of us.”

Dean tried to sit up, but the confession brought back the tears he thought were all gone. Instead he sucked in his sobs and grimaced at the waves of hurt and relief barreling through him.

“If you do not want to be my husband, I will understand. I would never force your hand on such a matter.” The weight lifted from the bed, followed by careful footsteps. They stopped on the side of the bed Dean was curled on. “Dean?”

With as much strength as he could muster, Dean peeked out from the blankets to meet the bloodshot eyes of his angel. There was no preparing him for how much he had missed that sight. Staring at each other, Castiel lifted a plain black box between them.

“Dean Winchester, will you marry me?”

Opening his mouth to reply, he found that it was too sore to speak. Instead, Dean lunged from his haven into the arms of his angel. His sobs answered the question as his head nodded repeatedly.

Castiel smiled, feeling the weight of life back in his arms.

#destiel #destiel fanfic #destiel fic #im BACK!#got a new tablet and im finally at a place in life where i have the time and space to write #hopefully more will be coming back out #prompts still accepted #cant wait to get back into the flow #sorry this was so angsty #happy ending tho of course

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eternallyoctober · 3 years

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Pls ignore this it’s for @maybenxt lol

TWO SISTERS

I sat on the spinny stool chair, listening to my sisters soft whimpers of discomfort.

We were in the basement of our house, which wasn’t really your typical basement and more of an underground lab, with hospital like floors and walls. Everything was sanitized and clean, just the way a lab should be.

It was split into two, the left part being Winstons lab and the right being Dorians. Dorian got the right one because he was always right. Does that mean Winston was always left? If you ignore the direction, that sounds pretty sad. Winston didn’t like being left behind.

Dorian shushed Ray as he continued to sew her arms. She gave one final whine before stopping, occasionally making silly faces. She always tested Dorian like this, making funny faces to make him laugh, tickling him even though he swears he’s not ticklish. It’s pretty funny to watch.

He was trying to find replacement arms for her, but her body kept rejecting them. Guilt clawed at my stomach even though my sister had forgiven me 100 times almost. This was my fault.

I stared down at my hands in shame. My skin was dry and covered in scratches, my nails were long and sharp, very dirty. I could use a trim. I pulled my knees up to my chest, sighing as my sister squeaked.

“Oww, that felt so weird!” She shuddered.

“Maybe if you stopped squirming that would happen less often.” Dorian continued working. I wanted to help, but Dorian wouldn’t let me, as I was still recovering from stasis.

I really was lucky to survive, or more of unlucky. I physically couldn’t stand up completely straight as my spine was crooked and almost broken, walking was an extremely difficult task and stairs were a nightmare.

I also had trouble eating and drinking water, even breathing was painful when I first got out of shock. I deserved every pain and ache, though.

Sometimes I envy Ray, how easy she seems to have it. She has plenty of friends that love her for who she is, she can accept change like no problem, she somehow hasn’t gotten any bad habits.. then I remember she doesn’t have the perfect life.

We’re more similar than I’d like to admit, she just knows how to pretend better. How to trick herself into forgetting her problems. Better than feeling sorry for yourself, I suppose. I looked over at her pained face, even with painkillers and laughing gas it was obvious she was reminded of some things.

After a few minutes of me staring she looked over at me and we locked eyes. She smiled at me, and I smiled back. I gave her a thumbs up and looked away, feeling a bit embarrassed.

There was something about Ray. You couldn’t hate her when she smiled at you. She was charming in her own idiotic way. Why didn’t I get that charm? Maybe I could have it if I wasn’t so... me.

“Aliceee, can I have another lollipop?” Ray suddenly said. She always knew when I was upset and I always knew when she was too.

“No Ray, you’ve already had 6.” I chuckled. We both always had a huge sweet tooth, we meaning everyone, even Dorian and Winston. Dorian surprisingly had the biggest, we like to joke that he has a full set of Sweet-Teeth.

“Fineeee!” She rolled her eyes. Dorian shushed her again, and continued working. She made a silly face at me when I looked to her again, it was hard not to giggle at her faces.

Sometimes I think I hate Ray, but that’s not true. I can’t hate her for how many times she’s listened to my stupid problems and given me good advice (after terrible joke advice,) how many times I’ve made her cry because of me.

I remember when I was younger and we were first introduced to each-other, it was.. honestly strange. At first I avoided her, which she seemed pretty fine with. Dorian wasnt fine with it though, saying “a family has to be there for eachother.”

Dorian tried really hard, he really did. It took the first death for her to really care, though. When I came back she was surprised, and gave me the first hug she’s ever given me. Unfortunately that lead to waaaay too many hugs.

It kind of just went from there, she knitted me blankets and I baked her cupcakes, she helped me pay off debts and I cared for her when she was remembering, she watched me play volleyball and I took her to the movies. It was a give and take relationship, and still is. I wouldn’t have it any either way.

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tumblunni · 6 years

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fuck, that story did so many complex things with morality, i think that’s why ultimately it was his most well remembered story like the basic premise of a unicorn looking for the other unicorns is basically nothing compared to the MILLION DEEP QUESTIONS it kindles in childrens’s brains along the way! and like, the fact that it was even aimed at children despite having so much dark imagery and psychological horror. and how the psychological horror comes from weird places?? like, it subverts and analyzes the fairytale genre and turns a lot of commonly accepted ‘happy ending’ things into absolute burning hell and eighty million other far more interesting plotlines springing from the corpse of the cliche it just killed. I love it. I LOVE IT.

Random examples of stuff that really intrigued me as a kid!

* the whole idea of how it starts off, that this unicorn just legit doesn’t know that anything happened to the rest of her people. she’s lived alone for centuries and doesn’t even know what loneliness is until she finds out that the world has changed while she wasn’t looking, and her assumption that there’s a million other forests with a million other unicorns was false. And like.. her journey is really complex because of it? her motivation is less about saving a family she personally knew, and more about the fear of being forgotten like they were, and like.. ‘do i even have any value if i’m not defined as a unicorn anymore, if people forget what unicorns mean?’ And like the idea of her first meeting other unicorns for the first time and having even mroe challenges to her perception of reality, like thats not even something she WANTS but the same somewhat rude and egotistical sense of honor she has as an immortal is gonna keep her going towards an ending that probably won’t be happy in any way.

* the many many nuanced moments where the unicorn completely fucks up and is generally allowed to be a flawed protagonist, despite existing in a narrative that’s from her perspective and paints her as perfect and her philosophy as the only thing that exists. And like.. how many of her fuckup moments are ABOUT her being this perfect godly figure to everyone else! How molly breaks down at seeing a unicorn NOW, instead of back when she was young and had hope of a happy fairytale ending. How she feels like she isn’t worthy of a unicorn even looking at her anymore, and how it manifetss into screaming anger, blaming this thing for being too late. And how the unicorn didn’t even know that this woman was waiting for her, and hinging her entire life worth on meeting her, and like.. molly isn’t prepared to look at it that way, if anything its even scarier to think that the people you idealise just DIDNT CARE. And how its complex cos i mean its not like the unicorn is bad, either?? She just didnt know what she meant to humans until she got out of her forest and started meeting them. She was so self-absorbed and proud about being immortal without even knowing the reason why magical creatures are considered godly. And its so complex cos the way she figures it out is via the actions of an asshole villain, like seriously its SO SAD that she gets to see little human kids feeling like they have a reason to live just from seeing the false image of a unicorn that the creepy slavemaster witch lady shows to them. the unicorn herself was powerless to be what they needed her to be, and all she even cared about was judging the humans as rude bastards for not being able to see her, rather than thinking about it as it really is, and realizing that its not like they don;t want to, they’re absolutely desperate to...

* and okay just seriously THE COMPLEX NATURE OF HUMANITY! cos she sees all the worst of humans and all the best of them too, and the story doesn’t even draw any conclusions as to whether we’re worth it, it’s up to you to decide

* also it was really deep and complex how becoming human wasn’t just a cliche happy ending for her! it was TERRIFYING! being forced into a new body wasnt even the worst part, it was the loss of identity factor that hit her after she was limited into a non immortal mind and soul. she goes crazy ‘feeling this body die around her’ and gets scared that she’s going to forget her old self, and also scared of going back to her old self because she doesnt know if these things like love are impossible for unicorns and she’ll become unable to feel them anymore. her opinion of herself falls so far from arrogance into outright FEAR! and its so fucked up because being human is hurting her like this yet she’s also kinda idealizing humanity and blaming it for all her positive character development and like SHE’S ANGRY AND SCARED OF POSITIVE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT??? it fucking makes my soul weep and then the ending is so fucked up cos she does return to being a unicorn, and no she doesnt stop feeling love for the human guy she fell for, and all her human friends who helped her this far. but now she’s burdened with the knowledge that she will never die and they will, so the story just ends with her running away so she doesn’t have to feel that pain, or burden them with any more pain too. And she’s even more alone than she was at the start, because she knows that none of the other unicorns understand these emotions, they’re all like her pre character development self and she could never be part of their world again. Its complex because these positive emotions and this kinder personality is like.. a curse to her. because at least she didnt hurt when she was blissfully oblivious, and didnt care about anyone but herself. Its like.. was this newfound ability to feel love actually a blessing, if she gets the love but also the ability to have her happy ending is forever lost to her? so really all she gained was the power to be aware that she was suffering all along. and like even if she managed to get magicked into a human again, the story makes it clear that it’s intense suffering for her, its like walking on knives and her personality would just melt away and she wouldnt even remember why being able to love was so new and so important. it’d be just like someone else having a happy ending instead, and her ceasing to exist. But then the story also gives us this very clear binary where all of her personality is very much linked to being immortal, and her only choices are to live forever and be sad, or to die and not even fully be happy because she’d lose herself. and like all she accomplished was losing the option she never knew she had- to live in innocence without a concept of good and evil, and thus never regret. which isnt a happy ending either, but at least she wouldnt KNOW she was in a bad ending...

* fuck this movie is so hard to explain and so sad

* oh and!! the harpy was fuckin terrifying!! and all the morality around it was even more so! its the first time the unicorn really fucks up, cos she’s just running on the honor of all magical creatures, which is very far from concepts like good and evil. she has to free a fellow immortal, even if its clear that the harpy is evil and will only do harm. but she doesnt even fully understand evil yet, all she knows is.. like.. fear? and betrayal. she knows that for some reason she doesnt understand, she fears this other person who is like her. and subconciously she recognises the darker side of what an innocence of good and evil can turn you into. but she recklessly chooses to ignore the humans trying to explain morality t her, cos thats just a human thing she doesnt need to care about, right? and then what ultimately surprises and scares her isn’t that the harpy does what humans think are evil, but that the harpy has no loyalty to the one who freed her, and immediately tries to kill the unicorn too. And you even get the sense that the unicorn would have still freed her even if she expected this would happen, its just this sense of duty between immortals because being caged means so much more when you’ll never even have the release of death. And i mean.., that’s kind of a point, too. the story’s one moment of embracing cliches is that it says that the harpy is just inherantly evil and was born evil, rather than more directly placing it as a parallel to the unicorn’s absence of good and evil. how do we know that this thing really IS an embodiment of all hatred, and its not just a lost and deluded creature like our protagonist, whose moral neutrality got pushed down the wrong path due to the difference of life it had once it first encountered humans? i mean, the unicorn encounters plenty of shitty humans too, but she manages to at least find some good ones and like.. she had a starting point of assuming she was a proud and inherantly good creature, which was confirmed even by the humans who manipulated and hurt her. she gets to see herself worshipped by humans, even if its as a way to make a quick buck. and we don’t know how long that harpy was locked up in an even worse version of her situation, and whether the unicorn would have become just as hateful if she hadnt been resuced... Its just kinda lazy to say ‘wow its good that shitty mc fuckface locked up this inherantly evil creature, yet bad that she did the same thing to you’ But still it makes for a really scary scene cos the film really went all out in establishing what a born-evil creature would actually be like, and how fucking terrifying it would be to deal with something that just wants to kill and kill and will kill even if there’s no benefit and no logic to it. It’ll betray anyone who shows kindness to it, and you’re being stupid by treating it like a real sentient being with thoughts and a soul. And thats terrifying. But its also fucking sad. And its the one lack of complex morality in this story. but i guess maybe i wasnt supposed to be a story all about exploring complex versions of morality, but just.. different and interesting ones? so taking the ‘inherantly evil’ trope and being like ‘no, you dont get to use that lightly, this is how horrifying and child-unfriendly that would really be’ is still an intriguing idea in its own right

...anyway its a real good movie also my lunch is burning cos i couldnt take it out of the over til i finished rambling RIP salmon dinner

#blunni thoughts

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