#lorelei's little world

[crazycatsiren]

I'll take boring holidays over chaotic holidays any year.

I'm so glad the husband and I readily and happily agree on the so much work that's just not worth it in the end part.

#mother witch ramblings #lorelei's little world #christmas #holiday season #the hype is overrated

[werepuppygaming]

My highlights from the recent Indie World Showcase!

- Little Kitty Big City - Refind Self: The Personality Test Game - Lorelei and the Lazer Eyes - Stitch

#indieworld #indie world #nintendo #direct #nintendo direct #showcase #indie world showcase #little kitty big city #refind self #lorelei and the lazer eyes #stitch #nintendo switch #indie games

[sshbpodcast]

Character Spotlight: Christine Chapel

By Ames

We’ve hit upon all the main stars of The Original Series, but no list would be complete without giving a fair mention to the woman who stood beside the show, Majel Barrett. While we still wish in our hearts of hearts that the Number One we met in “The Cage” and “The Menagerie” got a fair shake, we are still glad that Gene’s main squeeze was reborn as the quippy and competent Nurse Chapel.

So join us this week on A Star to Steer Her By as we finish off our TOS character spotlights with a bunch of highlights and only a few lowlights on what’s probably going to be our shortest installment of this series. There just wasn’t enough stretching of the character moments to do as we did for, say, our Scotty or Sulu posts. Pick up your medical tricorders to scan on below and follow along in this week’s podcast discussion (jump to 58:16). Needless to say, Majel probably did more on the show than just Gene. Take that as you will. ;)

[Images © CBS/Paramount]

Best Moments

I know he’s alive down there, Captain Very early in the series in “What Are Little Girls Made of?”, Chapel’s backstory of joining the Enterprise as a way to find her lost fiancé, Roger Korby, is established. And it’s a testament to her character that not only is she right that he was still alive (in some form), but she also gets to convince Ruk the android not to kill Kirk AND make the choice to stay on the Enterprise after everything goes typically sideways.

Plomeek soup for the soul While you’ll see in just a moment that “Amok Time” also features some of the more tired and less positive aspects of Chapel’s character, we’ve got to admit that her dutifulness in trying to get Spock to eat during his pon farr was benevolent of her. She goes so far as to whip up some Vulcan plomeek soup to keep her patient well, little good that it ended up doing.

Sound it out I’m still minorly horrified by Nomad taking Uhura’s memories in “The Changeling,” and we’re left not knowing if or how she gets back to her normal self. But one thing’s for sure: she’s got a caring and patient nurse helping along the way, as we see Chapel reteaching the blank-slated Uhura how to read in English. It’s quite sweet, if you don’t think about how horrifying it is.

It has one word on it: Eat I could take a second to gripe that, between Chapel and Rand, the women of the show are very often seen just bringing the men their dinner like they’re waitresses instead of equal crewmembers. Or I could highlight how Chapel cleverly tricks a moping Garrovick into eating in “Obsession” by telling him McCoy’s prescription was a tape that just said “Eat,” so I’ll do that.

The pain will help me to consciousness We joke on the podcast that it was clear that someone(s) on the show was clearly into some kinky stuff, and it shines through in episodes like “A Private Little War” when Nurse Chapel is compelled to bitchslap a half-conscious Spock around until he wakes up, as is the Vulcan way. Or at least, as is someone on the writing staff’s dirty little fetish.

We shared consciousness together I’m sure now that Strange New Worlds is filling in a lot of the Chapel-Spock relationship, there are a ton more shippers out there for them, but back in the day, the best we got was this moment in “Return to Tomorrow” when Sargon put Spock’s consciousness into Chapel’s body to get Henoch out of the Vulcan. And Chapel was all too glad to be Spock’s vessel in a not entirely creepy way. Only a little bit creepy!

I am a nurse first and a member of the crew of the Enterprise second When Nurse Chapel learns that McCoy is dying of xenopolycythemia in “For the World is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky,” her resolve is to help him to live, while he seems to take it in stride that he is destined to die. She encourages him to “Please, give yourself every minute” of his year left in this world, and I’d like to think that that helped him get through it. Natira helped too, wink wink.

The spider catches a fly While we included moments from “The Tholian Web” in almost everyone else’s Worst Moments lists, Chapel actually got a good moment from this otherwise negative episode! When another of McCoy’s assistants has succumbed to the weird space occurrence and attacks him, Nurse Chapel calmly grabs a hypo and tranqs that guy, like a badass!

Now all I want is to crawl away and die While I found Uhura’s reaction to the forced kiss with Kirk in “Plato’s Stepchildren” to be uncomfortable in an entirely different way, the Chapel-Spock kiss is exactly as uncomfortable as it’s supposed to be. Chapel’s pining after Spock is used as a weapon against her in this moment of torture. A worse show would imply that she’s finally getting what she wants, but she makes it clear that without consent, there is no enjoyment and it’s commendable to state that so directly.

I heard Spock’s voice Unlike my reaction to the different women’s scenes in “Plato’s Stepchildren,” I must say that all the women in “The Lorelei Signal” are absolutely on point. While Uhura takes command of the ship, Chapel serves as de facto CMO in the absence of all the men. And what’s more: she uses that weird bond she has with Spock (perhaps lingering from “Return to Tomorrow”?) to save him from the temptresses!

And they've probably redesigned the whole sickbay By The Motion Picture, we see that Chapel found time to learn a new trade, as she’s an MD by the time McCoy arrives. Was it that the writers seem to incorrectly think that nurses are on the same job track as medical doctors, just a lower rung on the career ladder? Probably. But we can read it as her changing jobs because she wanted to do something new, and that’s a more exciting interpretation for this change.

Look for the helpers. You will always find people that are helping. Blink and you can miss it, but Christine Chapel in The Voyage Home is busy coordinating relief efforts at Starfleet Command during the whale probe attack. She gets like one line and you only catch quick glimpses of her, but it’s an excellent touch to show that her character is there and focused on doing the thing that she’s been known for all series long: helping people.

—

Worst Moments

You hide it, but you do have feeling Onto some of the lousier things Chapel does in the show, and you’ll find that most are related to her one-sided relationship with Spock. We first see it in “The Naked Time” (before we know that BOTH of them are engaged) when she dumps all her love on him while space-drunk. And it’s a little sad and pathetic knowing she’ll never receive it back [in this series], but also just annoying that it’s the main characteristic the writers ever give her. Sigh.

A mechanical geisha would be no more difficult While we did include some moments from “What Are Little Girls Made of?” above in our Best Moments list, there’s some bad to go around as well! Did you notice just how jealous Chapel immediately got of Andrea the moment she laid eyes on her? Before she knows Andrea is a robot, she’s immediately grouchy when Andrea calls Roger by his first name. And afterwards, Chapel is flat out hostile to the poor, jumpsuited thing!

You never give up hoping, do you? Now for all the times in “Amok Time” Chapel utterly degrades herself because she has a crush on Mr. Spock. Bones jokes about it when she brings him the soup, for one thing. For another, there’s an entirely weird scene in which she goes to tell him they’ve changed course to Vulcan, but he’s still pon farring around and she starts crying. And to top it off, she just had to be present on the bridge (for no reason!) to witness T’Pring on the viewscreen and learn that he’s engaged, just to rub salt in the wound. And then she has no lines the rest of the episode! Poor Christine.

Spock will be yours forever One last time to roll our eyes at how contrived it’s been all series long, and now into The Animated Series, to watch Chapel swooning over Spock so much. So much so that she’s easily swayed by Harry’s Mudd’s offer of some of his love potion in “Mudd’s Passion.” She falls for it, and when it turns out to be the real thing, she barely even gets to enjoy having Spock all to herself!

Since when did we even have ID badges? She makes such an ass of herself that I’ve broken “Mudd’s Passion” into two entries! She is so distracted (and a little drugged) by Mudd that he steals her ID badge. She almost makes up for it by capturing him in the shuttlebay, but instead ends up drugging the whole ship by accident AND gets herself kidnapped and forced into a pretty pathetic damsel in distress role for Spock to heroically save. Oh Chapel, this is all beneath you.

Plenty of fish in the sea One final ditzy moment from Nurse Chapel, and it’s in the clownishly inconsistent “The Terratin Incident.” Sure, everyone in that episode is made to look silly because they’re shrinking down to the size of cockroaches (or smaller depending on the scene), but Chapel nearly drowns in a fish tank after tripping over a sewing needle. Why a sewing needle was next to a fish tank might be the stupidest question yet.

— And that’s it! We couldn’t see stretching the list further than that since you didn’t get to see Chapel do much else in TOS, TAS, or the films. Keep your eyes fixed here because next we’re going to be repeating the same experiment with all the TNG main characters, as well as keeping up with our watchthrough of all of Enterprise over on SoundCloud or wherever you podcast. We also keep all our logs up on Facebook and Twitter. Now eat your plomeek soup! Doctor’s orders!

#star trek #star trek podcast #podcast #the original series #christine chapel #the motion picture #the voyage home #what are little girls made of #amok time #the changeling #obsession #a private little war #return to tomorrow #for the world is hollow and i have touched the sky #the tholian web #plato's stepchildren #the lorelei signal #the naked time #mudd's passion #the terratin incident #majel barrett

[techdriveplay]

New Indie World Showcase Reveals Varied Line-up of Games Coming to Nintendo Switch in 2024

During a new Indie World presentation, Nintendo showcased a vibrant line-up of games from independent publishing and development partners that will be heading to Nintendo Switch throughout 2024. Among many highlights, the video revealed that SteamWorld Heist II, the latest entry in Thunderful’s popular SteamWorld franchise, will be launching for Nintendo Switch on 8th August. This new turn-based…

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#2024 Line-up #3D Platformer #Action-Adventure #Action-Adventure Exploration #Action-Platformer #Action-RPG #ANIMAL WELL #Another Crab’s Treasure #ANTONBLAST #Big City #Business Simulation #BZZZT #Cat Adventure #Cat Quest III #console gaming #Duck Detective #Embroidery Puzzles #Europa #Fast-Paced Platformer #First-Person Platformer #Game Demos Available #Game Previews #Independent Games #Indie Gaming #Indie World Showcase #Interactive Entertainment #Little Kitty #Lorelei and the Laser Eyes #Narrative Adventure #Nintendo eShop

[yawnderu]

Lorelei — Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader | Part II

1 2 3 4 5

Synopsis: Aware of the way his lifestyle doesn't align with your dream life and unwilling to quit his life as a soldier, Simon breaks things off with you. It isn't until a year later that he sees you again, a tiny carbon copy of him held in your arms.

"Can I hold her?" You dread the question. The way he asks it, the way he looks at you, the way you know he's going out of his comfort zone to come to your house, knowing you don't want him there.

"Sure." You put your pride aside, having the best interest of your baby in mind. The little girl is placed carefully in his arms, and it breaks your heart to see just how well she fits there, like a missing puzzle piece.

"She's so beautiful." He whispers, brown eyes fully focused on his daughter—his daughter. For someone who avoided the topic of family like the plague, the concept was still weird to even think about, despite the way the girl in his arms looked just like him when he was a baby, countless pictures hung around his house before they were permanently destroyed by his father in attempts to torment Mrs. Riley.

"What was that, Captain?" Simon crooned teasingly, leaning his head closer to the baby to try to understand the babbles that were slowly becoming more and more clear each passing week. Of course, she was still too young to talk, though the little girl loved babbling out at any given moment.

"She's lovely, isn't she? Shame she looks like you." Your words came out teasing for the first time ever since you saw him again, the banter in your previous friendship coming back for a second as he playfully glared down at you.

"Shame she acts like me too." He jested, the baby's mannerisms very reminiscent of his own. You poke your tongue out at him jokingly before looking back down at your daughter, the strings of your heart being pulled the more you stare at her. The little creature doesn't cry much, luckily, so you have all the time in the world to simply admire what you created— what you both created.

"Look at her tongue stickin' out." Simon pointed out to the baby's tiny tongue sticking out, a quiet laugh leaving his lips at the way she imitated you. You gently pinch her chubby cheek, planting a kiss on her forehead as a small laugh escapes you too. It's not hard for her to steal your heart, Simon noticed.

"Hush, darlin', daddy's busy flirtin' with mommy." He knows he's overstepping, but... it's worth the risk. He wants what you used to have back then, despite knowing he doesn't deserve it. He'll prove himself, Simon promised since the first time he saw you again.

"Just so you know, this—" You point between him, the baby, and you. "Doesn't mean we're together. Not a chance." You try to be stern, though you both can't deny the look in your eyes. Still, you resist, not wanting to be disappointed again. Simon leaving is an open wound that never healed.

"I know." He replied after a few seconds, not looking at you. His eyes were focused on the baby, holding her close to his chest as she cuddled up to him, quieting down from her babbling. He sat down on the couch, one of his fingers absent-mindedly running over the features of his daughter.

"I'm thinkin' of retiring within a year or two, once Makarov's dead." He starts hesitantly, not daring to look at you just yet.

"Do you think the three of us can be a family? I know I messed up, and I'm sorry." He finally looks up at you, though only for a short second before he's getting up again, gently putting the baby in her crib. He gives her a small plushie to cuddle, soft blanket wrapped over her tiny frame. He comes back to you, bare hands hesitantly reaching for yours before noticing you're about to recoil back. He doesn't blame you.

"I'll do anything." He swears, taking a step back to respect your personal space. You look away for a few seconds, arms crossed and a small frown on your lips. The thought of Simon leaving or dying is always there, eating at the back of your mind.

"You're retiring?" Is all you can ask, not bothering to hide the sheer curiosity and confusion. Simon has been a soldier since he was 18— it's all he knows. He has given up his entire life and family— why stop now?

"Yeah. Think it's time to slow down... actually live life a little, for once. I had to retire at some point, yeah?" It wasn't an easy choice at all. He has bled for the army countless times, lost his family because of it, lost so many allies he can't even count them in his head, yet the tiny girl was the one that made him realize enough is enough.

"Interesting." It's all you reply, eyes slightly narrowed as you look deep into his, seeking for any signs of hesitation or lying. You find none.

"I'm serious. I can be a father to her, and... a husband to you, if you let me. Just like you wanted." Just like you told him you wanted things to be. Just like he thought about before breaking up with you after 4 years.

"Don't have to give me an answer now, but I'm retirin' and that's final." He went to grab his backpack, pulling out a folder. He placed it in front of you gently before giving his sleeping daughter a soft kiss on the forehead, eyes fully focused on her as he memorized her features. It's gonna be a long time until he sees her again.

"I'm deploying in an hour." He mentioned, his back turned towards you as you read the papers. His will, updated to include your daughter. Previously, it was only you there.

"Not comin' back for a long while, unless things go well. If shit hits the fan..." He knows it's always a possibility when dealing with Makarov.

"You'll both have enough to live a good life." He was getting choked up. Not crying or tearing up, but uncomfortable enough that he was struggling to speak.

"Simon." You call out and he turns his head towards you, slight surprise in his features. It's the first time you call him Simon since he came back into your life— it used to be Ghost, much to his dismay, to place even more space between you. He never said anything about it.

"Something to keep your heart safe." You walk up to him, both of your hands holding one of his, placing a hard object in his palm. He looks down at it and his heart almost stops.

The ID bracelet your baby wore shortly after she was born. He nods his head once in acknowledgment, expression growing more determined as his fingers trace the outline of the plastic.

"Come back to her safe." Your hand hesitantly went to the back of his neck, pulling him closer until his forehead was against yours. He lets you, and you're both stuck looking deep into each other's eyes for what feels like forever.

"Come back to us." You plant a soft kiss to his forehead before letting go, basking in the slight sense of normalcy, ignoring your worthless pride for once. He leans down and returns the kiss to your forehead, nodding once. He stares down at you, memorizing your features the same way he did with your daughter before turning around and leaving, swearing to keep the silent promise with a newfound sense of determination.

[Previous] [Next]

Taglist:

@skulfan1 @survivalshxt @ghostslittlegf

#ghost mw2 #simon ghost riley #ghost cod #simon riley #cod mwii #cod mw2 #simon riley x y/n #ghost x f!reader #ghost x reader #ghost x you #ghost x y/n #simon riley x you #dad!ghost #dad!simon riley #mw2 fanfic #mw2 fluff #simon ghost fluff #ghost fluff

[viberevstudios]

The GEEK BROS take another break from their regularly scheduled programming to watch…then react…and react some more to Nintendo Direct Mini: Partner Showcase 6.28.2022 All this and NO MORE on this week’s special episode of the Keepin’ Up With The GEEK BROS podcast! TUNE IN on your favorite podcasting app or listen here - https://webegeekspc.com/nintendo-direct-mini-partner-showcase-6-28-2022-keepin-up-with-the-geek-bros-podcast-special/

#blanc #disney dreamlight valley #doraemon story of seasons: friends of the great kingdom #dragon quest treasures #fire emblem warriors: three hopes #harvestella #little noah: scion of paradise #lorelei and the laser eyes #mario + rabbids sparks of hope #minecraft legends #monster hunter rise: sunbreak #nier:automata the end of yorha edition #nintendo direct #nintendo direct mini: partner showcase #Nintendo Direct Mini: Partner Showcase 6.28.2022 #no man's sky #pac-man world re-pac #persona series #portal: companion collection #Return to Monkey Island #sonic frontiers #super bomberman r 2

[embrosegraves]

ℕ𝕖𝕩𝕥 𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 𝕃𝕖𝕔𝕝𝕖𝕣𝕔𝕤

Charles Leclerc x Reader (implied she/her) Charles and Reader name their daughters the same order as the Leclerc brothers. 

Mr Charles “Girl Dad” Leclerc

Warnings: Extreme use of the red heart emoji, IT'S SO LONG I'M SO SORRY, also watch out for Google translate lmao don't trust them to be exact

Still not the best at smaus but I'm working on it (between every 'post' will be a timeskip of an unspecified amount of time. my brain can't handle doing maths more than it needs to.)

instagram.com

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youruser Baby Leclerc Loading...

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yourBff I'm so ready to be an Aunty  → youruser One of the best ❤️

user omgomgomgomgomgomg user Is it a girl or a boy? → youruser We're waiting until the birth to find out user GUYS CHARLES MIGHT BE A GIRL DAD 

carlossainz55 Charles is gonna be out of a seat soon → charles_leclerc they're going to take your seat actually → youruser please don't encourage this, they aren't even born yet

Liked by racerbia, sebastianvettel and others

youruser As of Nov 8 2026, please welcome Lorelei Manon Haydée Pascale Leclerc ❤️❤️ Charles and I are so incredibly excited to share this chapter of our lives with everyone however we plan on keeping Little Lori's face completely hidden until she can tell us otherwise. We ask that you respect our decision and that you do not go out of your way to find out what she looks like ❤️

comments have been limited

landonorris Hey there Little Lori Leclerc  → youruser ❤️

carlossainz55 Bienvenida Pequeña Belleza translated Welcome Little Beauty → charles_leclerc Uncle Chilli reporting for duty? → carlossainz55 Of Course!

leclerc_pascale When can I see my precious grandbaby❤️ → charles_leclerc I will facetime you Maman ❤️

Liked by pierregasly, arthurleclerc and others

youruser Round Two LETS GO

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pierregasly Another gossip buddy!!!  → youruser Our gossip sessions are about to be so much cooler!

user ANOTHER ONE!! → user ok dj khalid user are you waiting to find out the gender again? → youruser ✨oui✨ user please be another girl, i need charles to be purely a girl dad

maxverstappen1 this one will be in a redbull i can feel it → youruser oh god not you too

Liked by LeclercLorenzo, leclerc_pascale and others

charles_leclerc Papa and Manon Spa Night (so Mama can try to relax before baby is born)

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youruser you have mastered the towel turban my love  → youruser Lori looks so cute 😭❤️

user Charles "Girl Dad" Leclerc coming in clutch → user he's in his element user be honest /youruser did you teach him the towel turban? → youruser i mean, not on purpose? he's watched me do it so often i guess he just, learnt??? user I love how squishy she looks MY HEART--

lilymhe this qualifies as Charles' official invite to Girls Night™ → youruser i'll add him to the groupchat lmao → charles_leclerc yeah babyyyyyy

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youruser And on October 17 2027, the world said let there be Charlène Madeleine Héloïse Pascale Leclerc ❤️❤️ Once again, we are so so so excited to share our growing family with the world. As we did for little Lori, we will not be sharing baby ChiChi's face until she can tell us otherwise. We are so grateful that everyone respected our wishes with Lori and we ask that you respect them once more. Love Always ❤️

comments have been limited

LeclercLorenzo Might be early but I'm sensing a trend... → youruser 👀/charles_leclerc → charles_leclerc a trend you say?? 👀

carlossainz55 Un'altra splendida bambina ❤️ proud of you guys translated Another gorgeous baby girl → charles_leclerc Grazie Fratello ❤️ translated Thankyou Brother → youruser Grazie Chilli ❤️

leclerc_pascale Another granddaughter to spoil ❤️❤️ → youruser I fear you'll put Char out of a job Maman 😂 → charles_leclerc you cannot spoil her as much as me! 😠❤️

Liked by LeclercLorenzo, leclerc_pascale and others

charles_leclerc My Precious Girls, how your Papa loves you

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youruser My Loves 😭❤️

user Another classic Charles "Girl Dad" Leclerc moment → user omg I saw them the other day and the way Charles looks at Lori and ChiChi 😍🥰 user Charles is so in love with his girls it make me feel warm and fuzzy inside → youruser makes me wanna have another lmao → user SO REAL FOR THIS → charles_leclerc oh? 😏😏

lilymhe Why can't we have this? /alex_albon → alex_albon our sons are literally your personal bodyguards... I can't even kiss you without their permission → charles_leclerc he misses you 😂😂

Liked by sebastianvettel, danielricciardo and others

youruser 3 is a magic number

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pierregasly Do you guys ever stop? → youruser who? → pierregasly you and charles → youruser no i mean who asked?

user has anybody noticed that the age gap between each leclerc baby is basically the EXACT same as the leclerc brothers? → user OMG I WAS GONNA SAY youruser before you ask lovey /user once again we're waiting for the birth ❤️ → user honestly at this point i think everyone knows it's gonna be a girl liked by youruser user Okay, they definitely have a theme going on here with Lorenzo and Lorelei, and then literally Charles and Charlène. this one is gonna be named after Arthur i know it

charles_leclerc One more after this? → youruser no <3

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youruser Say hello to our newest arrival, Artemis Marinette Helena Pascale Leclerc ❤️❤️ born on October 15 2030 For the third time, Charles and I invite you to meet our (now complete) family! Just as we did with little Lori and Baby ChiChi, Mini Artie's face will be hidden until she can tell us otherwise. Forever grateful that everyone is so understanding of all our daughters' privacy, thank you all so much! get ready to see a whole bunch of the Leclerc Sisters on your feed from now on❤️

comments have been limited

carlossainz55 I can't keep commenting in another language now, you used all three that I know → charles_leclerc sounds like a you problem mate → youruser be grateful we're only having three kids Carlos

sebastianvettel One more for the collection → youruser my daughters are not like your cars and their bond girl names → charles_leclerc i'll be honest, i did laugh a little

LeclercLorenzo Some might say I... called it. → youruser don't even, you knew when we told you about naming Little Lori → LeclercLorenzo let me live in my delusion

kimimatiasraikkonen 👍 → youruser never change Kimi ❤️

Liked by fernandoalo_oficial, georgerussell63 and others

charles_leclerc At least Mini Artie likes to kart 🫠❤️

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georgerussell63 I think it's hilarious that not even your mini me likes karting → youruser it is the funniest thing to watch as Char sulks because of it → pierregasly I can only imagine 😂😂 → charles_leclerc what is this, bully Charles day?

user Mini Artie is gonna carry on the family legacy → user can you imagine omg youruser come back home the kids miss you → user i had to double check that this was ACTUALLY the mother of his children liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, youruser and others user I see no one else has realised that all three of the girls birthdays are THE DAY AFTER the person they're named after. → youruser believe me, that wasn't planned ((it was harder to plan than it should've been))

youruser I love you so much Char. Best father, best husband ❤️ → charles_leclerc Je t'aime encore plus, Ma Chère. Best mother, Best wife ❤️ translated I love you more, My Dear

holy shit that was long jesus christ.

uhhhhhh hope you enjoyed? reblogs and likes would be much appreciated because this took me SO MUCH LONGER THAN I THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO

#formula 1 x you #f1 x reader #f1 fluff #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc instagram au #charles leclerc smau #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc #reblog with tags i missed please and thank you

[halamet-chalamet]

Okay okay.. hear me out on this... what if you and Matthew have just had a baby.. and he makes them one of his stuff animals and the baby doesn't know whether to be scared or happy... so they do like a little cry but then smiles.. but its not like just a one time thing they do it everytome they see the thing before they realize that it's fake...

Oh my gosh yesss. His stuffed animals are terrifying bruh.. but also cute but the octopus was a NOH. Also dad!Mathew 😩 let’s gooo

Warnings/content: no warnings! It’s pure fluffy dad Mathew! Featuring Marty (you’ll see) okay enjoy!!

It’s been 6 months since I’ve given birth to Lorelei. 8 months since Mathew came to the realization that I was pregnant with a real baby, a baby girl to be exact. Not that he didn’t know these things before but then he realized it was really only two months away.

Given this newly discovered fact Mathew decided to go crazy on crafts for baby Gubler. Drawings, and paintings for her room. Little blankets with her name crocheted in them, and a little yellow stuffed ‘animal’. It was really more of a creature or monster that Mathew liked to call Marty. Until Lorelei was ready for toys we kept Marty in a little toy bin at the bottom of her closet.

Though, now that she’s hit 6, nearly 7 months, crawling and getting into everything, we’ve decided it’s time for her to get into more of her less infant-like toys.

Mathew wanted the honor of getting out the bin and playing with her, much to my happiness as I get to watch and possibly record. Mathew took little Lorelei out of her high chair after feeding her breakfast and brought her to her nursery.

“Lorelei, I have a little surprise for you my girl!” Mathew cooed with a smile on his face as he brought out Marty the Monster. “Hi there Lorelei I’m Marty! Can we be friends?” He asked in his best monster voice.

Instead of the initial response we assumed she’d have, giggling or smiling,wanting to play. Our baby let out a noise we’ve never heard before.

First she was upset. Our least favorite sight occurred as she sat there with tears falling down her face. But she followed the tears with a small giggle and smile.

“What was that?” Mathew asked, still talking through the monster.

Lorelei let out another noise and crawled towards my legs.

“What’s wrong, muffin?” I asked our daughter, putting her on my lap.

“Do you think it scared her?” Mathew asked me. I couldn’t stand the sad look in his eyes.

“Maybe,” I replied. “Let’s try again.” I picked up Marty, the adorable yellow monster, and put him in front of Lorelei.

The baby hid her face in my chest but once again let out a small chuckle.

“Lorelei,” Mathew chuckled. “This is our friend! Seeee?” He squeezed Marty while using the baby voice he always used when he was trying to play with her. Lorelei now looked a little more comfortable as she smirked a little bit at her dads antics.

Gently, Mathew grabbed her tiny hand and put it on Marty. “See? He’s just a little plush guy?”

I smiled at the two loves of my life, interacting in such a silly and adorable way. Lorelei took the yellow stuffed animal from Mathew and giggled looking at the face of Marty.

Mathew got off his knees on the floor in front of me and our daughter and came to sit next to me. “That was a lot of grief over Marty.” I joked, looking over at him.

“It was, but it was worth it.” He almost whispered, kissing my forehead and then Lorelei’s.

Lorelei has been a daddy’s girl since day one. She would whine if I gave her a smooch while she was ‘busy’ but that’s not the case with dad, of course. She gave the same tiny smile she always gave, and looked up at Mathew like he was the best thing in the world. It was a sight that melted both of our new- parenting hearts, even though it sounds super cheesy.

After Lorelei had disregarded Marty, I put him in the corner of her crib, while Mathew took out new toys from her bin, to play with her.

“It’s going to be nap time soon,” I warned the both of them. Not that they were particularly listening, but Mathew gave a little nod which was enough affirmation for me. I took a seat back on the carpeted floor and watched my two favorite people be adorable.

A/N- okay this might totally suck, it’s my first blurb for Mathew so let me know if you have any feedback. Also my requests are open :) that’s all love you byeeeee 💖

#mathew gray gubler #mathew gray gubler x reader #mathew gray gubler headcanons #criminal minds #spencer reid #mgg fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #send requests! #criminal minds headcanons

[magic-is-something-we-create]

- BETA READERS WANTED -

Do you like Grimdark Fantasy? How about Horror? Noir? All of the above? Do you want to watch fictional women dole out incredible violence as their lives get worse, and still find hope in the world? Are you a sucker for enemies-to-lovers, especially of the kind that's convoluted and messy in their emotional attachment? Have you been yearning for more disabled and/or trans protagonists in your life?

Do you want a story where love corrupts instead of redeems?

Do you want to read a tragedy that was inescapable long before the story began?

My novel Whispers is in need of some beta readers!

Marika Swiftfoot has hidden from the Shadow of Fowden for ten years, but ten years isn’t a life complete.

She has a debt to pay, and the Whispers have finally come to collect. And once again, she is ripped away from everything she calls home as the result of a poor choice she made years ago, when she didn’t know what would come.

But she will not go to Fowden without a fight.

And she swears the man who brings her there will die by her hand, no matter how much she once loved him.

Lorelei, too, is steeped in the regrets of her past, for she is known by three names: Softheart. Witmouth. Vowbreaker.

She wants to earn Hopebringer before her legs give out for good.

But first, she needs to find out what happened to her little sister. First, she needs to find the man who has disappeared just as untraceably, thirty years later.

First, she needs to end the Shadow of Fowden.

For she is not her father; she does not break her vows.

Content warnings, beta reading details, and sign up are below the cut!

Boosts are appreciated!

Important basics:

- It's 172,000 words, or about 750 pages.

- First-person, dual POV narration. Most of it is present-tense, but one POV features frequent past-tense flashbacks.

- The target audience is Adult. It dives headfirst into a plethora of dark topics, and reader discretion is advised.

- The main critique focus is on plot effectiveness and points of potential confusion. I'm especially looking for whether the twists are too predictable/too unexpected, and whether the ending is satisfying. If you won't have time to read all of it, please don't sign up.

- The hard deadline for critique completion is July 1st, 2024. The document will be sent out on January 10th at the latest.

RECURRING CONTENT WARNINGS

Body horror, gore, violence, and death. Emotional abuse. Transphobia and sexual assault. Harm to children and implied child death. Police brutality. Ableism and physical abuse. Fire.

STILL INTERESTED? You can sign up to be a beta reader here!

#writeblr #writers on tumblr #original fiction #beta reader #beta reader wanted #fantasy fiction #dark fantasy #fantasy #horror #mystery

[undercover-smutlover]

Lieutenant Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley…💀

main masterlist📌

*·˚Don’t forget to reblog, follow, like, and comment on the authors’ or artists’ pages. Show them some love!

*·˚Broken link or @? Pop a note in the comments or my ask box.

Works by @ghostsareeverywhereblah2

Guard Dogs Pt.1: “He’s even cuter in person”

Guard Dogs Pt.2: “She’s always listened, just not to you”

The Progeny Series: “Shit, Lt. Looks like you actually have a real admirer”

Grumpy x Sunshine: Who in the world can be in a relationship with Simon?

Works by @lethalchiralium

Delicate + König: You were glad you had them both, satisfying your needs

Raindrops: He’s trying to remember every moment

Works by @ghosts-cyphera

Bloodied Bullets, Soft Confessions: “I guess I’d been lucky so far.”

Pornstar Ghost:  All genuine, from both of you

Works by @yawnderu

Adoration: while he holds you closer, thinking of more jokes he read online just to tell you

Lorelei: ''She's looking at you like she knows you.'' Your response is ominous to say the least

K-9: He took that chance to look at you, to truly admire you

Works by @peachesofteal

Dead Disco: The one that’s always left behind

Light On: Simon has a new neighbor

Works by @lvrxly

Singledad!Ghost: "Eh, I kinda like your son more than you, he's less broody," You tease

An Odd Feeling:

Three Is A Crowd by @xyziiix: Well your Captain always like proving you wrong

Cherry by @barefoothighlander: Ghost finds out about your side gig

The Captain by @as-is-above-so-below: Ghost’s wife joins the team on an op agaisnt his wishes

Bleeding Out Pt.1, Bleeding Out Pt.2 and Bleeding Out Pt.3 by @constantcrisis19: A bomb almost levels the entire town. Ghost extracts you.

Oneshots & Multichapter and Price’s Birthday by @rileyslibrary: An entire collection of Simon Riley oneshots

The Things I Never Said Pt.1 and The Things I Never Said Pt.2 by @lvlyghost: When the inevitable happens, you run

Ghost in the Austrian Asylum by @prazinos: The two of you want him as well

Painless Bruises by @trashykawahq: Avoiding Simon’s gaze is harder than it’s ever been

The Experiments by @diaryofanidiot: Forced to fight and claw her way to live

Resentment by @starl1cht: You distance yourself. But does he notice?

The Accused by @amoristt: You fucking ran. What choice did you have?

Badges of Honor by @clairdelunelove: Ghost always recieves the biggest stickers

King!Ghost x Princess!Reader by @hyperactively-me: Stubborn Princess who warms up to the King

Ghost x Civillian Masterlist by @sim0nril3y: How he met his civillian and fell in love

Sole Survivor by @halcyone-of-the-sea: “Who’s the guy with the mohawk?”

The Twins by @princessdimondheart: He saw his own eyes

How many fingers am I holding up by @sprout-fics: “Don’t hate me for this, Si.” You think weakly

Lime-Sized by @imperihoe-writes: Sighing happily, she wiggled a bit deeper into his embrace

Bodyguard!Simon x Popstar!Reader by @xo-cod: Simon looks on in pride

Phantom Frost Line by @diejager: You’re a new face, unknown to Ghost and he isn’t too keen about the news

Nothing’s New by @thewriterg: He held you like he always will and as he always had

Unmasked Love by @springtyme: she turns her head to look over at you with an excited expression on her little face

My Baby Swinging by @tojisun: Simon and his pretty little sweetheart’s adventures

Welcome Home by @babygirl-riley: but when she was around wow, he would make sure everyone knew who she was

Odds On by @bits-and-babs: The smirk that had been threatening to break finally cracks across your lips at the confirmation of your victory

Digging Gaze by @halcyone-of-the-sea: But he was afraid, as well. Terrified

His Heart, His Light, His World by @thexsilentxwordsmith: "You deserve it all, Simon. Every once of it."

Unexpected by @dammn-dean: Simon felt a pang of something up his spine, similar to jealousy but close to disappointment in himself.

If Only You Would Have Trusted Me by @ltghosty: That was the only thing that helped you come to peace with the things you were forced to do in order to protect your family.

Husband!Simon by @ahqkas: he didn’t hesitate to scoop the smiling baby up into his arms

Glory Days by @sstormyskyesss: If you weren't focused on calculating the best strategy out of this particular setback, you’d be able to see the stars in Simon’s eyes

Simon Riley Collection by @starstruckmiraclekitty:

Cure For Me [zombie!ghost] by @groguspicklejar:

Who Wants to Live Forever by @writeforfandoms: Then his lips twitched. “Took you long enough.” 

Vegas Wedding by @ceilidho: When he stretches an arm up to scratch his upper back, you almost whimper at the way his arm bulges. 

Secret Haven by @lightwing-s: and the moment his eyes caught yours you could clearly understand his message.

Lovely by @daisies-daydreams: “Even though this isn’t on my finger while I’m at work, I’ll always act like it is,” you reassured him

Homeward Bound AU by @writeforfandoms: You spared a brief thought of thanks that your mother had taught you everything about this job. 

Firefighter!Simon Riley by @thelaisydazy: He loves the ones handed over the counter by the cute worker that smiles at him and fusses over the dog every morning.

Simon’s Favorite Hair by @lovifie: And in that moment, with your hair still in his hand, he knew he was in trouble.

Smells Like Team Spirit by @tulipsbymybed: Star lacrosse player for his university, pretending, his roommate, is his girlfriend

Coffee Shop by @sinkovia: His life was good, and he couldn't ask for more

Among the Bullets Ch.1 Pt.1, Ch.1 Pt.2, Ch.2 Pt.1 by @chaosandmarigolds: “Adrenaline makes the body do some pretty insane things, sir.”

Dividers by @cafekitsune

#undercover-smutlover #call of duty #modern warfare #cod smut #task force 141 #lieutenant simon riley #ghost #simon riley #lieutenant #favorite fics #smut

[crazycatsiren]

"You've become all American!" My family members in China still jokingly lament.

Alas, they aren't around me enough, lol.

They don't see that I eat rice with dinner almost everyday, that woe betide any visitor who wears outside shoes into my home, that I have kept Buddhism and Chinese folk religion in my life, that I still like to eat my eggs with soy sauce and vinegar, that anyone who dares to make a dog eating joke in my presence is banished from my company immediately and for the foreseeable future (I'm Manchurian, my people love and honor dogs, no one from this side of my ancestry has ever tasted dog meat, and we honor that tradition to this day). I'm still fluent in my mother tongue, can sing my motherland's folk songs from memory, and know and can write both my Mandarin and Tungusic names.

And I keep my great-grandmother's cloisonné bracelet in my special jewelry box, I've had that since before I left my native land, before my beloved taitai passed away when I was 13.

#witches of color #women of color #asian witch #chinese witch #personal #diary #people of color #family history #lorelei's little world

[lafemmemacabre]

My personal top albums of all time

If anyone who respects my music opinions is interested, IN NO ORDER because I can't choose between my babies. Also, warning, it's mostly gonna be albums from the 90s. Only the albums that are described as Gothic Rock, Darkwave (Neoclassical or not), Deathrock and Ethereal Wave are goth, the rest are some other flavor of dark alternative.

Aégis, by Theatre of Tragedy (1998)

Exquisite Gothic Rock, despite the band usually playing Metal, with themes of mostly Greco-Roman mythology with some other European folklore thrown in. The most angelic and soft soprano vocals delivered by Liv Kristine with baritone whispers delivered by Raymond. Ethereal yet complex atmospheres with soft guitars, strong bass, poetic lyrics in Shakespearean English.

Highlights: Cassandra, Venus, Poppæa, Bacchante.

Inferno, by Lacrimosa (1995)

Gothic Rock that flirts slightly with Metal in some tracks. This is when they made the jump from Neue Deutsche Todeskunst (basically late 80s/early 90s German Darkwave except it's a little weirder than most other Darkwave at the time) to more Rock-based styles of music, as well as the first album Anne Nurmi was featured in. Tilo's best studio vocal performance in my opinion. Beautiful lyrics about love, passion, devotion, and the end of the world, could only be written by a goth guy with a gift for poetry who just fell in deep love. Only iffy track is Copycat but even that one is still a classic among fans if only because of its high energy, and killer guitars, bass and percussion.

Highlights: Schakal, Vermächtnis der Sonne, No blind eyes can see, Kabinett der Sinne.

Passion's Price, by Diva Destruction (1999)

Diva Destruction's debut, from back when Darkwave was actually dark and dreary in sound. Songs about heartbreak, betrayal, abuse and love, in the band's most musically complex and hauntingly atmospheric album. A definite classic with nothing but great track after great track.

Highlights: The Broken Ones, Snake, Prey, Glare.

Selected Scenes from the End of the World, by London After Midnight (1992)

Some of the best Gothic Rock to have ever come out, in my opinion. Deep, rich, dark, mysterious, sensual, macabre, romantic (arguably too romantic even by 90s goth standards as the album apparently got criticized for being almost entirely love songs? Wtf). The song that introduced me to goth in February of 2007 is in this album and it's the reason why I never looked back.

Highlights: The Black Cat, Claire's Horrors, Sacrifice, Spider and the Fly.

Annwyn, beneath the Waves, by Faith and the Muse (1996)

Ethereal Wave royalty in maybe not their most iconic album, but definitely the one closest to my heart by them. Despite goth music being associated with darkness in the minds of most, this album is full of glittering light in the most poetic and heartfelt way possible. The vocals are soft and tender when they need to be, delivered by Monica Richards, or firm and epic when needed, as delivered by William Faith. The lyrical themes are full of Celtic folklore, love, hope, magic and a feeling of reclamation of nature and an ancestral past (but not in like, a white supremacist way, I promise).

Highlights: Annwyn, beneath the Waves, The Hand of Man, The Silver Circle, Rise and Forget.

Treasure, by Cocteau Twins (1984)

Walking a thin line between Ethereal Wave and Dreampop (as they're pioneers in both genres). Some tracks are darker than others, but they're all equally delightful, full of beauty and a dreamy gaze hovers over every single song, all of which contain some of the most heavenly vocals in the scene. One of Robert Smith's favorite albums (he also really like Diva Destruction's debut!). If you're into more relaxing and atmospheric music, this might be your intro to goth.

Highlights: Beatrix, Persephone, Pandora (for Cindy), Lorelei.

Anthology, by Nosferatu (2006)

Legendary Gothic Rock band among those of us who enjoy a campier vampiric goth sound that takes itself too seriously, and deliciously so. Yes, I know I'm cheating by going with a compilation album, sue me. It's simply a collection of their best tracks and I honestly couldn't choose between all their actual albums, so there!

Highlights: Inside the Devil, Lucy is Red, Rise, Witching Hour.

Es reiten die Toten so schnell (or: The Vampyre Sucking at his Own Vein), by Sopor Aeternus & The Ensemble of Shadows (2003)

Probably the gothiest and most elite Neoclassical Darkwave out there. Deeply macabre, equally horrific and beautifully crafted, with expressive and dramatic vocals, themes of vampirism and death masking more human subjects such as social rejection (Anna Varney-Cantondea is a trans woman/transfeminine person who's battled suicidality and depression from a very young age), depression, gay/trans desire, and suicidality. It truly is a masterpiece of macabre and neoclassical goth.

Highlights: The Feast of Blood, Holy Water Moonlight, Baptisma, Dead Souls.

Blood Death Ivory, by Angelspit (2008)

Probably one of the few modern Industrial bands who have thoroughly kept the spirit of early Industrial alive, fashioned after greats such as Skinny Puppy and Die Form, especially in the 00s when the Industrial scene heavily turned to more superficial lyrics based on the aesthetics of cyberpunk art rather than its subversive content. The music is aggressive, simultaneously animalistic yet robotic with a touch of demonic, rarely ever without smartly phrased critiques of capitalism and consummerism. At this point in time the band was a duo between Amelia Arsenic/Destroyx and Zoog Von Rock. It's definitely some edgelord shit (affectionate), but by no means in a vapid, only-for-shock-value way.

Highlights: Skinny Little Bitch, Lust Worthy, Devilicious, Jugular.

Alles für dich, by Grausame Töchter (2012)

Some of the most dynamic, deliciously quirky, sexual, hyper and twisted Dark Electro bands currently making music. The lead vocalist and lyricist of the band, Aranea Peel, is a lesbian dominatrix, fetish model, trained ballet dancer, and lover of Weimar republic era artistry who absolutely imprints lots of dark flapper energy into the band's music and imagery. The lyrics are unabashedly perverted, kinky, sapphic and fucked up. Her singing is nothing short of chef's kiss worthy, always expressive and strange, but with pristine execution and technique.

Highlights: Tanz für dich, TABU, Therapie für dich, ICH DARF DAS!

The Astonishing Eyes of Evening, by Cinema Strange (2002)

KINGS of 00s Deathrock with touches of Dark Cabaret influences, as inescapable in the goth scene in the 00s as She Past Away and its many copycats are now, and for very good reason. Delightfully macabre, not the first to use ghostly androgynous vocals but certainly one of the bands who better utilize that style of vocals. Imo, this and their homonymous album are must-listens for people interested in the goth music scene in general, but especially those interested in Deathrock. Truly Halloween turned into an album.

Highlights: Tomb Lilies, Catacomb Kittens, 'Ere the Flowers Unfold, Legs and Tarpaulin.

Opheliac, by Emilie Autumn (2006)

Literally music for mentally unstable sapphic girls with a poet's soul and flare for both irony and intense earnest feeling. It's a very original combination of Synthpop, Punk Cabaret, and Neoclassical music, with influences of Industrial and Darkwave. It's all masterfully crafted by classically trained violinist, poet, writer, actress, and somewhat of a burlesque performer with a rich alto voice; Emilie Autumn. She wrote this album after suffering medical abuse at a mental hospital after a suicide attempt brought on by an abortion and emotionally abusive relationship. I'm not exaggerating when I say this album saved my life and also changed me as a person.

Highlights: Opheliac, Liar, The Art of Suicide, 306.

Of the Want Infinite, by Requiem in White (1995)

You don't often hear of bands combining Deathrock and Ethereal Wave as they're often perceived as the polar opposite ends of the spectrum of goth music; Deathrock being the goth subgenre closest in sound and idiosyncrasy to punk, and Ethereal Wave being one of the goth subgenres furthest from goth's punk roots. Add in an operatic soprano and you get... Some of THE best, most underrated goth bands of the 90s. Dramatic, ethereal, creepy, elegant, ghostly and complex, with incredible vocals. Truly a pity they only released one album and a couple of EPs.

Highlights: Everlasting Peace, Beneath the Leaves, My Shame, Acanthus.

Agony of the Undead Vampire Part II, by Two Witches (1992)

Truly another giant of vampiric Gothic Rock, absolute 90s legends and Finland's most iconic goth band. Themes of vampirism, occasionally anti-Christianity, sex, sensuality and kink abound. The vocals might put some people off, but it's definitely worth it.

Highlights: The Hungry Eyes, The Omen, Mircalla, We All Fall Down.

Mors Syphilitica, by Mors Syphilitica (1996)

Requiem in White may have disbanded after their first proper album, but two out of its three core band members, then spouses Lisa and Doc Hammer, went on to form pure Ethereal Wave act Mors Syphilitica right after and while it's generally less dark and spooky than its predecesor band, they're still a delight to the ears.

Highlights: The Woman Who Believed, Fell a Dance, The Vain Stroke, Below the Baleful Star.

Beyond the Veil, by Tristania (1999)

I've raved about this album so many times. Just... THE definitive Gothic Metal album to me. The lyrics, the choir of sopranos (aka all Vibeke Stene and her rich, sensual, dark, gorgeous voice), the perfect growling, the somber baritone vocals, the perfectly crafted guitar riffs (no guitar salad, all expressive and precisely timed), the exciting epic percussion, the piano, the violin solos, THE SYMPHONICS. Oh, my God. There's not one second wasted in the entire album, and I'm not being hyperbolic, I mean that. Truly the perfect Gothic Metal album.

Highlights: Beyond the Veil, Angina, Heretique, Opus Relinque.

Serpentine Gallery, by Switchblade Symphony (1995)

Tbh all of Switchblade Symphony's discography is fantastic, but their debut truly is a masterpiece. Creepy ragdoll vibes all over, great vocals, rich composition, poetic yet accessible lyrics. If you're into a more kindergoth vibe (Wednesday Addams, creepy dolls, child-like or even lolita-esque looks), this might be the band for you.

Highlights: Clown, Mine Eyes, Dollhouse, Bad Trash.

Vampyre Erotica, by Inkubus Sukkubus (1997)

The other band that introduced me to goth in 2007 and got me to never look back. Though the first song by them I ever listened to, Samhain, isn't from this album, this album is the one that truly got me hooked for life. Vampiric, sensual, decadent and dark. It has everything including really sweet vocals.

Highlights: Vampyre Erotica, Danse Vampyr, Hell-Fire, Heart of Lilith.

Link to a YouTube Playlist containing all the songs from all the albums above.

[princessprettyprivilege]

The Siren’s Pull

It’s been a full year since I began my blog!! A woman siren is the center of her universe while anyone in her radius in her orbit. This post is centered towards sirens.

What is a siren? According to Merriam-Webster, a siren today is a sinister but almost irresistible woman. A siren song, however, may be any appeal that lures a person to act against his or her better judgment.

Synonyms: seductress, vamp, temptress, -stress, Mata Hari, femme fatale, Delilah, Lorelei or (dated) mantrap.

The Siren Allure

A simple definition of allure is to enchant. A mythological siren’s allure is in her voice, a screen siren’s allure is in her vanity, social pull and personality, and lastly, an everyday siren is all of the above. Her power is PSYCHOLOGICAL.

A siren can maintain her allure by walking at her natural pace. Nothing is more typical and human than being in a rush everywhere.

I elongate my body in a world where most people are scrunched up. For my walk, I elongate my stride and partially stand on the balls of my feet, but not to the point of tiptoeing. Check out my pose references Pinterest board!!

I’m aloof when I walk from place to place and only focus if I have to. Most sources say to focus on an object to have a “model stare”, but I feel it isolates people out of your “siren pull” more than being in your own head does. Why are sirens by themselves instead of in groups?

Consider what you are taking from your target. What satiates your hunger?

Sirens come in all dispositions and walks of life. Don’t worry if your circumstances aren’t the same as a historical siren.

What is your weapon of choice? Avoid overwhelming yourself at one time by using too many weapons. Examples of weapons are:

• vanity/pretty privilege as a trap**

• flirting with your womanliness by sticking your chest out & using touch

• your vocals & intelligence

• charisma

• grandeur

Your Pull

Your pull is comparable to a phone signal. If a target strays too far away from you (the tower), their phone will be rendered useless. Of course, your target will always linger nearby because you’re as important as food and water. Be the tower.

My siren’s pull is vanity.

Make your targets’ mouths run dry. Before your nose can process the scent of your fragrance, visualize your confidence and energy as a scepter. Sirens put their confidence and feminine energy on the frontlines such as:

• swinging their hips as they walk

• applying perfume or drawing lipstick on themselves in public

• take up space as they move [like when men manspread]

• showing a little leg or ankle

• practicing their signature poses in public

What’s your Siren song?

#high maintenance #femininity #high standards #siren aura #pretty privilege #level up #princesskhalyiah

[doctorofmagic]

Why magic in the MCU has failed

I remember the "good" old days when Doctor Strange was about to debut back in 2016. I was obsessed with spotting every single little magic detail in the MCU in the hope that magic would slowly grow in status and importance, only to give up after so much disappointment.

But the major issue? The moment Feige stated that every side project was a part of the MCU. People who experienced phase 1 and 2 will remember that magic was a taboo. "It's just science we don't understand yet". While it's a common line quoted by Marvel's greatest geniuses, we all know it's pure arrogance on their part. Otherwise, they'd be doing what magic users do.

It was not MCU's case. Magic was INDEED treated as science. From Ghost Rider's portal being reproduced by a robot through the Darkhold to Wanda's powers being a product of an experiment but not explained at all. From a loooong season of Cloak and Dagger taking its time to finally introduce magic elements to Nico's staff almost falling to the same old "technology" trope. From whatever is happening in Asgard to Loki's limited magic. It's frustrating, but we'd still find a way to turn the tables, right? The Dark Dimension was introduced (twice?), the (third) Darkhold was finally attached to Chthon, Morgana and Lorelei debuted, Nico's powers were finally acknowledge as magic... So what happened?

My best guess? Structure.

There's no structure to define what is magic in the MCU. Doctor Strange (2016) tried. Really hard. And, although it got several things right, it failed in two fundamental aspects: pre-established comic book knowledge and magic deities.

Remember how we got three Darkholds? The first was just so detached from magic that it became a book used to create a VIRTUAL world in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. The second was used by Morgan le Fey, but how was she associated with the Dark Dimension? Moreover, that was NOT the Dark Dimension from the first DS movie (or any comic book, really). Its last appearance, as seen in WandaVision and DSITMOM, finally mentioned Chthon, but it literally did NOTHING it was supposed to do. That MCU!Wanda has nothing to do with her 616 version, this is not new. But if we're going to use comic books as foundation to adapt a story, the very bare minimum you can do is do it right. Point is, the book does corrupt people, but it's because of Chthon's influence and his connection to Wanda. Where's Chthon in the movie? The corruption was badly explored and her journey towards evil and redemption doesn't make any sense from a magic point.

Now, the "main" magic cast in the MCU could have worked... Except that there's little to no information regarding how Kamar-Taj works as a temple/school for new sorcerers. And worse even, magic isn't connected to its deities. Sure, there were a few name drops, but does it explain where it comes from? And who chooses the next sorcerer supreme if the Vishanti isn't involved?

The truth is, magic was all over the place, and the creative minds were either too oblivious to the importance of learning about how magic works in comics (to the point of adapting a second Dark Dimension that has nothing to do with the original one) or too shy to introduce a magic hierarchy (as in, deities).

There's an actual attempt to create this structure now, but it's too late. Sure, you can ignore past tv shows, but the mess remains. Eternity was supposed to be an abstract entity, deeply connected to magic, cosmic aspects and life itself.

Loki is still so embarrassing because the very foundation of Asgardian mythos started wrong (and why is that? Because no magic, of course!). While I find funny that Stephen trapped Loki in an endless freefall, there's no way the god of stories would be humiliated like that. Loki being taught magic by his alts is infuriating (and it's, again, mostly illusions).

Remember when Stephen was beaten by math? That also happened.

This is the moment I completely give up to see magic portrayed at its fullest, in all its beauty and complexity. Because it's not treated the way it deserves. It has never been.

And here's my boldest take: if you really wish to see the full potential of magic in the MCU, go for What If. The price you pay, the cosmic proportion of being misused, the creative elements... It's all there. Which is sad because it's not the main timeline. Anyways, this is it.

PS: This post may age poorly as DS3 comes out in 20 years. Let's wait and see.

#ds3 being my only source of interest regarding magic bc agatha and loki are NOT it #i keep loosing #mcu #mcu discourse #analysis #magic

[tired1mmortal]

Out of all the motifs @jelloapocalypse could have given people, I did not expect FOOD to be important symbolism in Prison of Plastic.

The candy, cake, and such that Lorelei makes takes no effort at all to make. She just waves her hand and boom instant dessert platter. This is also usually the only kind of food she makes with her epithet. What strikes me is how this is easily comparable to how Lorelei tries to connect with Molly. She makes cool worlds for fun playtime that would make any kid green with envy, but it’s little more than a low effort bribe to win over a child, like a divorced parent spoiling their kid to win custody despite being incredibly unfit to raise a child.

Then there’s the fact that it never lasts, because she never concentrates on it long enough for a person to digest it. This was mentioned a few times and after Giovanni’s conversation with Martin it’s clear why. She never develops her ideas. She never puts in the effort to reuse them. She never works hard towards anything. She just expects to be able to augment her way out of anything. And that’s exactly why she’s no good for Molly.

Because Lorelei always has to have her way, and always takes the easy way out at the slightest inconvenience, she could never be the dependable parental figure Molly needs.

Enter Soup Best Boy

Unlike the candy which is just empty calories soup is a meal. Even if it may not be a person’s first choice for a meal, soup is healthy. Soup is warm, comforting, nurturing, and even Charlie’s entire family got by with cabbage soup before he got the Golden Ticket. We see a lot of these soup like qualities in the book, and even back in season one.

Gio loves his boys. He gets defensive when people belittle them like when Mera belittles them after easily taking Gio and his boys down. Or when Molly implies that his minions are kinda weak. He is always very swift to defend his minions even when he was about to get beat up back in redwood run. Like any good cook he take pride in those who assist him and knows they all have their strengths.

Another major thing about Giovanni is that he’s always encouraging to his minions, especially those who need him in the moment. Admittedly Soup can burn but it’s good for people in the long run. Giovanni berates Car Crash for living up to his name but in the same sentence expresses concern that he may have astigmatism (which believe me is annoying). He was a little bit tough on Molly but that’s just to nudge her to be a little bit more assertive, and all of her friends notice the positive effect it’s had on her.

Giovanni spends almost all of the museum arc talking with or protecting Molly. After tricking indus into freeing them, Gio immediately shifts into fun older cousin mode. They make a fort, she talks to him about her problems and he listens. Unlike Mollys family he listens and he even give her advice and encouragement. Then when Sylvie come in Giovanni is quick to jump to Mollys defense and to get her out of the fire. He is very willing to put in the effort and risk himself for Molly even though they just met.

This is made even more apparent with how he is with Lorelei. He respects Molly’s input and doesn’t give Lorelei an easy in with his group, and yet, he still gives her a fair shot to join. He sets up a challenge that is designed to be impossible, not to test he capability at the task, but to test her character. He bans the use of magic because her abilities aren’t what he wants to know about. When Lorelei messes up the first batch, the first thing he does is tell her that she failed, but that it’s ok. That he doesn’t think less of her for failing. He encourages her to be better.

The second time, that’s when Lorelei gets a little burned. Giovanni tries to soften the blow but it doesn’t change the fact that Lorelei couldn’t cope with not succeeding and cuts several corners using a lot of magic to seem like she did better. She didn’t care who she had to step on for Giovanni’s approval. And that was the problem.

Lorelei tried to cover her every mistake with a layer of frosting in more ways than one. But Giovanni doesn’t see value in someone willing to step on others. That’s why he left the Bonzai blasters in the first place. He wants someone willing to put in the hard work, willing to accept defeat, willing to take the bumpy road despite the difficulties as long as they come out better for their failures. Just because you mess up the broth a little bit doesn’t mean it’s gone to waste, but Giovanni recognizes that Lorelei needs to cool of before giving her another try.

Giovanni himself let his taste suffer to improve his Epithet, and he doesn’t regret it at all. He would do it all again because all the improvement he’s made was built on his trial and error, valuable experience, and determination to make himself a great villain with the card he was dealt. While Lorelei may be able to make wonders rivaling Willy wonka like nothing, Giovanni has made a great soup from a stone.

Lorelei has the power to maybe not fix everything but at least make things better for her family, but she won’t even bother to try.

Giovanni isn’t some big shot rich guy, and he doesn’t even have a job, but he always wants what’s best for his minions and is willing to fight for them. Honestly that’s what matters. Giovanni isn’t the sweet candy most kids would want, but he’s the good soup that Molly needs.

Lorelei makes things with a wave of her hand, Giovanni puts all his heart and soul into it.

is just something I’ve been thinking of for a while.

Let me know if any of you have your own interpretations of this. Or at least better words for it.

#giovanni potage #lorelai blyndeff #Food #Parallels #epithet erased #epithet erased prison of plastic #character analysis

[shyvioletcat]

A/N: I'm gonna be honest, i lost my editing steam about halfway through Rowan's second POV, so past there we're just going to ignore any errors due to my impatience. Thank you so much for your patience, this chapter has been sitting in my brain for a long time. It's something other than poorly edited

~ Made of Ashes Masterlist ~

~~~~~

Aelin was so tired she didn’t know how she was conscious or functioning. The inevitable had happened, her precious little baby was sick. And she was left floundering.

It had started out fairly mild. Just a little bit of a runny nose and some irritability. The first few days had been next to nothing and Aelin had been able to cope fairly well. She was a little sleep deprived and a little anxious, but that was all and overall it hadn’t been too bad. And then Elsie didn’t get better, in fact she got worse, and everything flipped on its head. Now Elsie was coughing, often wheezing, a low appetite and a fever just to round it out. Aelin was doing her best and she managed to get Elsie to take some pain relievers that helped the baby sleep. The real issue was getting Elsie to eat enough, she was still only breastfed but Aelin fed her whenever she wanted, no matter when. It just felt like it wasn’t enough.

It had been two days of Aelin barely sleeping while fretting over her fussy daughter. Every cough and whimper had her nerves on edge, as did trying to placate to Elsie’s every whim. Aelin was battling this fight on her own. Her parents were on a business trip in Rifthold and she didn’t want to risk spreading the infection to Rue, and Korby was already sick. So Aelin would soldier on, in the trenches and on the front lines. 

Seeing her daughter sick was heartbreaking. It left her with a deep feeling of helplessness, because at the very heart of it there was nothing Aelin could do to ease her baby’s suffering. Nothing seemed to please her and the best Aelin could do was hold her just about every minute of the day. When Elsie wasn’t attached to her mother she cried like her own heart was breaking. Aelin hadn’t showered in a good 36 hours and sustenance came from whatever she could make and eat one handed. 

They were currently on Aelin’s bed with the pillows stacked so that she could lean back and rest Elsie on her chest so they were both mostly upright. Elsie fussed, fighting sleep, her little whimpers sounding congested. Aelin knew her daughter needed rest, it would be the fastest way to get better. A nap would do them both some good in fact. 

“Come on, darling,” Aelin whispered, eyes closed like all her energy diverted to keep her mouth moving. “Just sleep, even for a little bit.”

Elsie protested, rubbing her face on her mother’s shirt, no doubt getting drool and snot everywhere. Aelin didn’t care, dirty clothes weren’t a concern right now. Keeping her eyes closed Aelin started to hum and there was a moment of quiet before Elsie started fussing again. She changed to singing You Are My Sunshine softly. That one almost worked but Elsie’s contentment only lasted about a minute. And then a song came into her head at random, and Aelin was singing it before she even realised what she was doing. 

Beautiful Dreamer, wake unto me,

Starlight and dewdrops are waiting for thee;

Sounds of the rude world heard in the day,

Lull'd by the moonlight have all passed away!

Beautiful dreamer, queen of my song,

List while I woo thee with soft melody;

The song was one Rowan used to sing all the time, one that his mother used to sing to him if he was to be believed. Aelin’s voice was weak and uneven, but she did her best. This song sounded better when Rowan sang it, his accent adding a bit of whimsy, almost making it sound like some kind of faerie lullaby. 

Gone are the cares of life's busy throng

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!

Beautiful dreamer, out on the sea,

Mermaids are chanting the wild Lorelei;

Over the stream let vapours are borne,

Waiting to fade at the bright coming morn.

Beautiful dreamer, beam on my heart,

E'en as the morn on the stream let and sea;

Then will all clouds of sorrow depart,

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!

Elsie went quiet and Aelin let out a shaky sigh of relief. Finally, a reprieve. Aelin sang it again and Elsie stayed quiet, and half way through the third time the baby was asleep. Too tired to care, Aelin didn’t bother trying to open her eyes knowing that sleep was hovering over her. It was barely a minute later and she was asleep. 

Something pulled Aelin to consciousness, not even realising how deep of a sleep she had fallen into. Within a few heart startling moments she would realise it was mother’s intuition. Elsie was still on her chest, awake and in distress. Her breathing was rapid and Aelin was sweating herself from how hot the infant was. Aelin’s body reacted first—tipping forward and cradling Elsie in her arms so that she could see her better. 

Elsie’s breathing was deep and rapid and she was looking pale. One of her fists waved about, knocking the side of her head and ears. And then Elsie coughed, an awful sound that had Aelin’s insides twisting with panic. Her baby was unwell, severely unwell.

Aelin fumbled for her phone, her hand shaking from panic and exhaustion. She couldn’t manage the string of numbers so she went to contacts instead, tapping frantically on the one that simply read: Mum.

“Hello, hello,” Evalin said cheerfully, her face appearing on the screen. 

“Mum, what do I do?” Aelin asked.

Concern flooded her mother’s features. “What do you mean?”

“She’s breathing so hard and her temperature is so high,” Aelin said, her voice heightened with her increasing alarm. “I just fell asleep for a second, just a second.”

Aelin was aware she was reaching hysterics but she couldn’t help it. Panic well and truly had set in and the overwhelming need to protect had taken over, except there was no physical threat. There was nothing she could do. 

“Show me what her breathing is like,” Evalin said, the tension in her voice clear but she was trying to stay calm.

“It’s ah… it’s fast,” Aelin flipped the phone to show Elsie. “And she’s coughing and the pain medicine must have worn off because her fever is back.”

Elsie’s breath caught and she coughed, disrupting her breathing more. Two sets of worried turquoise eyes met each other through the phone screen. Aelin broke. 

“Do I take her to the doctor or the hospital? How am I supposed to drive? I can’t watch her if I’m driving, what if she stops breathing?”

“Oh my sweethearts,” Evalin sounded devastated. “I’m sure she’ll be okay but I think you should take her to the hospital.”

Aelin sobbed, she couldn’t help it. She tried to keep it together but exhaustion and fear were overwhelming her—she was so alone right now. 

“Aelin, don’t drive. Call someone to come get you,” Evalin said. 

 But Aelin’s brain was scrambled, no one immediately came to her. “Who?”

“Aedion, he’s the closest.”

“Yeah, okay,” Aelin said a bit weakly. 

“Call him and then call me back,” Evalin said. “I’ll stay on with you until he gets there.”

Aelin hung up, then called Aedion straight away. She was holding her breath until she got an answer. Somehow she managed to be coherent and Aedion promised to be out the door moments later. Aelin was about to call her mother back when Elsie had a coughing fit, lasting so long that the baby vomited. It covered both of them and Aelin swore under her breath as she tried to contain the vomit and make sure Elsie was all right. 

Elise cried and cried, her pain and discomfort obvious. Aelin tried to comfort her as she bundled Elsie up the best she could and headed for the bathroom, snatching a change of baby clothes from a clean washing basket on the way. There wasn’t time for a shower and Aelin didn’t want to risk the chill Elsie might get after. Aelin stripped the soiled clothes off both of them and threw them in the bathtub and then yanked down a towel to give Elsie a wipe down before dressing her in leggings and a long sleeved t-shirt. The crying hadn’t stopped and Aelin felt tears gathering in her own eyes. The helplessness was overwhelming.

“Aelin.” Aedion was standing in the doorway, his face tight as he took in the scene.

“She’s sick,” Aelin said, sniffling. Her brain was fried and she couldn’t think of anything else to say.

“Yeah, poor thing.” Aedion’s tone was soothing, low and soft. 

Aelin stood, keeping a safe hold on her daughter. “We gotta go.”

Aedion stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. “Hold on—’’

What was he doing, didn’t he realise they had to leave? Now. Aelin was about to verbally protest when Aedion gave her a look that had her biting back the words.

“You don’t have a shirt on, and you’ll need your wallet and the nappy bag.”

Aelin had been so concerned about getting Elsie dressed after the vomiting that she hadn’t got a change of clothes for herself. All Aelin wore was a crop bra and pyjama pants. She couldn’t go to the hospital like this. 

“Pass her to me and go get what you need,” Aedion said, holding out his arms to take the baby.

Aelin nodded, passing Elsie over. “Clothes, wallet, bag.”

Over the crying Aedion repeated, “Clothes. Wallet. Bag.”

Aedion left the bathroom, murmuring to Elsie as she cried, but Aelin forced her brain to focus on what she needed to do now. She needed clothes, and her wallet, and stuff for Elsie. Three things and then they could go. In her bedroom Aelin threw on a pair of leggings and the first clean t-shirt she could find, also grabbing a sweatshirt because hospitals were always cold. Next she darted off to Elsie’s room, stuffing more clothes and nappies and a pacifier into the bag. All that was left was her wallet that was on the kitchen counter. 

She found Aedion pacing between the living area and the edge of the kitchen, whispering to Elsie. Aelin was so focused on getting out the door that she didn’t notice the quiet at first. Her daughter was still whimpering softly but the desperate crying had stopped. It irrationally hurt to see Elsie settled when Aelin had been trying so hard—for days. Aedion’s eyes met hers over the top of Elsie’s head and he gave her a weak smile. 

Aelin didn’t return it, too single minded to sort through her feelings. So she just grabbed her wallet from the bench and she was done. “Ready.”

There was a wordless agreement that Aedion would keep Elsie, at least until they got to the car. Elsie was content for the time being and there was no use disturbing her more than she needed to be, even though it caved in Aelin’s chest a little to keep the distance. Blessedly the elevator was quick to arrive and there were no stops down to the garage parking lot. Aedion unlocked the car, but Aelin opened the door and he eased Elsie into the car seat. As soon as the connection to her uncle’s chest was lost the crying started again. Each second seemed to drag on, and for a few of them Aelin waited just holding the door. When Elsie’s cry broke into a screech it kicked Aelin into gear and she was darting around to the other side of the car and climbed into the back seat. 

“I’m here, baby girl. I’m here,” Aelin tried to soothe and Aedion finished up with the buckle. Elsie’s eyes peeked over at her, her bottom lip pouting. “Just hold on, we’re going. You’ll feel better soon. 

The drive consisted of Aelin repeating assurances over and over again, words of comfort and keeping her hands on Elsie so she knew her mother was right there with her. When they got to the hospital everything passed in a blur. Aedion dropped her at the doors and Aelin hurried with Elsie through the doors. As a sick infant Elsie was seen within minutes.

Aelin felt like she was in a limbo as she waited for Elsie to be assessed. To help with her initial comfort they gave Elsie oxygen and put a monitor on her foot. Next it was quickly determined that she was at risk of dehydration so they attached an IV too. That was traumatic, and Aelin thanked the gods that Aedion was by her side when that happened. He was able to hold Aelin’s shaking hand and help keep Elsie still while the nurse injected the needle in her hand. Aelin wasn’t letting her daughter go, even if she barely had the strength. 

It was nearly another hour before they got the full diagnosis. The doctor had introduced herself as Sorsha and Aelin had to hand it to her, she had an excellent bedside manner. She was patient with both Elsie and her mother while the stress was high. Her hazel eyes were kind and sympathetic, but she was assertive and clear every step of the way. 

Sorsha delivered the news on Elsie’s diagnosis herself. She had RSV, which led to an ear infection and bronchitis. Aelin’s heart seized at the words but Sorscha assured her that it sounded scarier than it was. All three were common and treatable, and it was all caught early enough that there were no serious repercussions. And on top of that they had discovered there was a slight structural abnormality in the tubes that connected her ears to her sinuses which had been the cause of the ear infection. It had to do with drainage and bacteria, but Aelin had been too focused on fixing it that most of what was said went over her head. She was told Elsie would most likely grow out of the ear problems, she would just be more susceptible to more infections until she did. The doctor commended Aelin on her actions and left her to process what she’d just heard. 

Aelin had done the right thing, Elsie was okay— just needed to be monitored.

They were moved from the ER department to a room in the children’s ward of the hospital because they would be staying for at least a few days. Aelin barely left Elsie’s bedside, and quickly fell back into the habit of barely sleeping. There was a reclining armchair for her to sleep in, a consideration made for those parents that would be staying with their children. But the constant beeping and noise of the hospital kept her awake, as did the anxiety over her daughter’s welfare. It didn’t help that every time Aelin started to drift off she was graced with dreams of Elsie screaming, or crying, or vomiting. She would startle awake, unsure of what was reality and what wasn’t, only to find Elsie sleeping soundly. 

Aelin’s mother arrived around lunchtime on their first full day in the hospital, and it was only then that she managed to get a solid amount of sleep knowing that someone else had eyes on Elsie. She was unfortunately woken up about an hour later by a nurse coming in and doing another check. The consensus was that Elsie wasn’t declining, but she still needed to stay in for observation. 

Evalin went out for food, which Aelin only picked at until visiting hours were over. Elsie’s condition had kind of plateaued instead of getting better. Everyone kept saying at least she wasn’t getting worse. What ate away at Aelin was that maybe she hadn’t done enough, that she hadn’t seen the signs earlier and acted too late. Maybe all this could have been avoided if she had been more vigilant. Aelin had been hanging by a thread so she hadn’t noticed how serious Elsie’s condition was. To punish herself further Aelin had googled the what ifs in those hours that she couldn’t sleep and was berating herself for letting it get this far to begin with. 

Another night in the hospital was spent watching Elsie as she slept, sometimes fitfully in between medications. They gave her doses to keep her comfortable but it couldn’t take all her ailments away. The tiny girl still woke up in distress, crying from pain or discomfort from the IV, or coughing and waking up in an unfamiliar bed. Aelin was doing everything she could to make sure Elsie was comfortable and content. But it wasn’t enough. 

A new day started and Aelin was still staring at her daughter, cataloguing everything. Her breathing was easier, but it still shuddered every once and a while. There was a slight decline in the frequency of the coughing fits and blessedly they deemed that Elsie was eating enough that she was unhooked from the IV, temporarily at least. 

Evalin was their visitor today and had taken it upon herself to fill everyone in with the updates, using the group chat on Aelin’s phone. Lorcan was checking in incessantly, because guilt was riding him too. Unbeknown to everyone Korbin had RSV, and yes, it was the consensus that was where the sickness had come from. Elide and Lorcan had kept him home instead of coming to dinner that night, but it seemed that Lorcan had been the one to pass it on to Elsie. He felt awful and had sent Aelin numerous apologies, he even went as far as calling which was all but unheard of from him. Aelin told him it wasn’t his fault, reciting the statistics of how common infections were this time of year. It was winter, it was cold, people got sick.

All her friends were rallying to Aelin’s side, offering any and every kind of help they could—mainly in the offering of food to keep the visitors down in the hospital room. Her mother was in charge of crowd control, Evalin was a pro at managing people and telling them when to do things. That was probably the reason why the next guest arrived.

“Hey,” Fenrys said softly from the doorway. 

Aelin nearly jumped despite the non-startling care he had taken. “Hey, Fen.”

“I’ve got some snacks,” he said, holding up a bag as he walked into the room. “How’s she doing?”

Aelin looked back at Elsie, who was sleeping. “She’s doing okay. Getting better.”

“That’s good,” Fenrys said. 

Fenrys drifted over to where Evalin sat by the window, passing over the food and chatting quietly. Aelin didn’t bother to try and decipher what was being said, the beeping of Elsie’s monitor was too loud. As were the thoughts tumbling around in her head. 

“Go home, Aelin,” Evalin said, snapping Aelin out of her trance. “She’s okay, I’ll be right here.”

“I can’t,” Aelin replied. 

“You can,” Evalin’s voice was a little firmer. “Have a shower, get some clean clothes. I won’t leave her side, I promise.”

Aelin looked up to her mother’s face, seeing the honesty there. If she promised not to leave Elsie’s side, Aelin believed her. It would be hard but Aelin knew it was the right thing to do. She’d been in these clothes for two days and she hadn’t done more than wash her face. 

“I’ll drive you, come on,” Fenrys offered. 

Fenrys dropping by with food had truly been divine intervention or very purposeful planning. Aelin supposed it might be the latter. She might have been able to take her mother’s car, but she wasn’t too confident in her driving right now. With Elsie sleeping and Aelin didn’t want to wake her but she couldn't leave without pressing the softest of kisses to her daughter’s head. 

On the way out to the car Aelin stopped by the nurse’s station just to let them know what was happening and that she would be back as soon as they could. They nodded along and promised to ring if anything occurred while she was out. When they undoubtedly saw the colour drain from Aelin’s face they told her nothing would, because Elsie was doing fine. It still left Aelin’s stomach in a tight knot. 

Fenrys led her out to his car and opened the door for her. Aelin fingers drummed on her thigh as she waited for him to get in. The quicker they left, the quicker she could get back. The usually talkative man was silent on the drive back to her apartment and Aelin wasn’t sure if it was a blessing or a curse. She didn’t have the energy for conversation but the silence also left her alone with her thoughts. They swirled inside her mind, building and inflating into what felt like a treacherous storm.

“Want me to come up?” Fenrys offered as he yanked on the handbrake.

“Um,” Aelin's brain was foggy. “If you want?”

Fenrys looked at her for a moment and then made his decision. “I’ll come up.

As soon as they were out of the car Aelin had her keys in her hand, ready and waiting to get her to her apartment. Then it was just the habitual ride up the elevator and walk down the hallway. 

Being inside her apartment had Aelin relaxing, even if it was just by the smallest amount. She wanted a shower, maybe some food, but then she found she couldn’t move from where she stood in front of her couch. Aelin’s tumultuous emotions were winning, try as she might she couldn’t hold them at bay any longer. She wrapped her arms around her body as the last defence of keeping herself together. It failed and a sob tore out of her before she could stop or flee to where no one could see her long held in breakdown.

“Aelin,” Fenrys said tentatively. She didn’t answer, she just cried harder. 

Fenrys was moving closer and a little voice in the back of Aelin’s head told her to stop crying, wipe her face and smile. But she was tired and sad, her daughter was sick in the hospital and it was all her fault.

“Hey, come here.” 

Arms that weren’t hers wrapped around her and Aelin was pressed against a hard chest. She let it happen, accepting the small gesture of comfort. Tears soaked Fenrys’ shirt, but he didn’t seem to mind, he just kept holding her until she was the one to call it. Aelin was embarrassed at how long it took her to calm down, and even then she couldn’t stop tears from gathering and falling down her cheeks. 

“I’m okay, Fen,” Aelin murmured, not pulling away just yet though. “Sorry about your shirt.”

“I don’t mind,” Fenrys said. “You wanna talk about it?”

“I—” the words were choked on a sob. “This is my fault.”

“What? No.” Fenrys pulled back enough so that he could look down at her. “This is not your fault.”

Those words meant nothing, guilt and despair was all consuming. “It is. Because I am not enough for her. I let it go too far, I should have taken her to the doctor or the hospital sooner, but I was just so tired and I have no idea what I’m doing. Elsie is suffering because I am not enough. I am supposed to be everything that she needs and I failed her.”

“No, Aelin. You know that’s not true,” Fenrys said.

“It is. I should have seen the signs but—”

“Aelin, please listen to me,” Fenrys actually pushed Aelin back so that she could look her in the eyes. She couldn’t hold the eye contact, she turned away, eyes closing and squeezing more tears from her eyes. “Kids get sick, and you were everything Elsie needed. There is no doubt in my mind that you sacrificed just about all of yourself for her benefit. That was enough for her, but shit happens, things that are out of your control. That is what happened. Not you.”

Aelin exhaled, her body shuddering as she tried to wrangle some control over her emotions. She risked a glance at Fenrys’ face. This man was known for his perpetual joking and troublemaking, seeing him so serious was odd but comforting.

“You are more than enough for Elsie,” he said. “You always will be. We’re all here for you, the both of you, but you are all she needs.”

“How did I mess up so badly then?” Aelin’s tears fell with a new fervour. 

“Because you’re new to this and you did do the best that you could. And when you had to, you asked for help,” Fenrys told her. “And RSV is so common, it’s something that they say is only a matter of time.”

“How do you know that?” Aelin asked, dabbing her nose on her sleeve as she finally felt brave enough to step away. 

“I did my research once your mum let us all know,” Fenrys replied. “She’s awesome by the way, real cool lady.”

“I’ll have to tell her you said that, she’ll be flattered.” Aelin felt a bit lighter. 

“What makes you think I haven’t told her myself?” Fenrys said cheekily. That made Aelin laugh and he tapped a knuckle in her chin. “There we go.”

“That’s gross, Fen. Who knew it would take you hypothetically flirting with my mother to break me,” Aelin's voice was shaky with laughter and withheld tears. 

“Had to get you to listen to me somehow,” Fenrys said with a genuine smile. 

“Um, watch TV or whatever,” Aelin waved at the couch. “I shouldn’t be too long.”

“Is there anything I can do?”

That question threatened to trigger a new wave of tears. Aelin had always been too independent for her own good, the last few days had proven that. So not wanting to set off another round she declined and all but fled to the bathroom and showered. It felt amazing and she was more than refreshed when she stepped out onto the mat and grabbed her towel. It was then she noticed that the vomit covered clothes had been removed. Someone had been in and tidied up, and instead of feeling embarrassed she just felt gratitude. 

Dressed and ready to go, Aelin did a quick check of her phone to see if there were any messages. Just one, from her mother, letting her know Elsie had woken up but was content. Aelin knew that would only be for the time being she would have to get back as soon as she could to prevent a monster meltdown. She also noticed that it was mid afternoon on a Tuesday—time and space had no relevance in the hospital. 

Fenrys was sitting on her lounge and Aelin shot him the question her phone had triggered. “Shouldn’t you be at work?”

“Nope,” Fenrys said, not looking over right away. Like he needed a moment to form his single word answer.

“But, it’s a work day. Don’t tell me you took it off for me.” If he had… it was just something else that she would beat herself up over. 

Fenrys now doubt sensed her rising panic as it was broadcasted across the room because he said without hesitation, “I quit. Finally.”

Aelin remembered something about a game company seeking him out, but as far as she knew he had stuck with Stone City. “You what?”

Slapping his hands on his things once, he stood from the couch. “Come on, let’s get you back before your mum eats all the good snacks.”

There was something more going on here, Aelin could feel it. But she definitely lacked the tact to get it out in the right way. So she just nodded and grabbed what she needed. They stayed silent until they got to the elevator, right up to when Aelin started to fidget again. Fenrys hip checked her, making her smile. 

“Remember what I said, okay?”

Aelin turned so that she could face him, finding him looking quite serious but still with that underlying playfulness which she decided to take advantage of. “What exactly? You say a lot and most of it is straight bullshit.”

Fenrys raised his eyebrows at her, like that was the most preposterous thing he’d ever heard her say. But then made a show of contemplating the words, making Aelin smile.

“You may be mostly right,” he conceded. “But you are everything and more to Elsie. You will always be enough, don’t forget that.”

Those words were said with such sincerity that Aelin felt her frayed emotions rise up again. She nodded and then turned away before the tears could fall. Fenrys, being the decent guy that he was, pretended not to notice. Damn him and his unfailing charm because despite herself, Aelin might just be starting to believe him. 

~~~~~

It had been an uneventful few days at work. The company was in their post Yulemas lull, giving all the employees a slight breather. All their clients had blown out their budgets in the lead up to the biggest commercial season of the year and were now recuperating and re-evaluating their next steps. So, all Rowan had to do was maintain contact and scope out new clients, wooing them through stories of successes from the past few months. 

The wider office outside his door was fairly quiet as Rowan read the company email that went out everyday. It was full of information he already knew, most of which he had some hand in as part of his managerial role. Skimming it, Rowan assumed there was nothing he needed to take note of. 

And then he almost missed a memo, it was so short and brief and he’d been intent only glancing over the words. But Rowan’s eyes caught on a familiar name and that was enough to give him pause and to give it the time of day. His eyes went a bit wider and he even went as far as checking his phone like the answer would appear. It didn’t, all he had were email notifications from clients. 

Rowan sat back in his chair, reading over the memo again. Fenrys had left Stone City Advertising. There was no explanation, just a short note that he was leaving that was meant to notify everyone else that there was no point in contacting him. Rowan didn’t know why, but none of his friends had said a thing about it. That unsettled him, and it also made Rowan question why he wasn’t notified as part of his role as manager. He picked up his phone ready to send a text off to Lorcan to ask him about the sudden departure when there was a knock on his office door.

It was Dresenda, a new hire. Maeve’s assistants usually had a two year job life span before they started to look for employment elsewhere. Rowan liked his job well enough but he would never want that job. “Hey, Rowan. Maeve just got in and she wants to see you.”

“Thanks,” Rowan said, standing and slipping his phone back into his pocket. 

Maeve had been over in Terrasen, wooing a high profile client and from how long she was gone, it seemed like some sight seeing as well. It would be bitterly cold there this time of year. The end of January into February was when winter sunk its claws in. Snow would cover the city for days, maybe weeks if they were lucky. In Doranelle the weather was milder all year round, snow was a rare sight here. Rowan loved the cold, it had made Terrasen feel like home in a way—like that climate was made for him. All things considered it certainly didn’t feel that way anymore. 

It was irrelevant, he was here—his life was here. His affection for the cold wouldn’t be enough to draw him back. Roman wasn’t sure there was anything that would lure him back to that city that had so painstakingly thrown him out.

~~~~~

Rowan should have been working. Not technically, but there were things he needed to do. It was a Thursday evening and he’d only left work half an hour later than everyone else with the plans to go home and finish off a few things before he went to bed. And he had opened his laptop and left it by the chair he planned to eat in… but then he’d got distracted. Rowan had made his dinner then had every intention of reading over some reports when he very randomly opened a website for one of the local department stores and was now scrolling through pages of children’s toys. 

He didn’t know much about kids but he knew that they liked toys. His company had developed more than enough advertisements to appeal to the younger audiences to know that it was a very lucrative business to be in. What Rowan hadn’t been prepared for was the sheer amount of variety. 

Dolls, building blocks, miniature kitchens, unicorns, plush toys. The list went on. His mother had mentioned that Elspeth’s birthday was coming up soon, and an idea had taken root. In his quest to get to know his daughter better he had the idea that he might buy her something. To him sounded dangerously close to bribery, but he was willing to try anything. 

Rowan was cleaning up after his fairly late dinner when there was a hurried knocking on his door. He shook his hands off over the sink and then snatched the tea towel from where it hung on the over handle to dry his hands. The knocking came again, this time more urgently. Curiosity had him moving a little faster, wondering who was insistently trying to disturb his evening. 

This time the knocking was short, sharp and hard. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Rowan muttered. 

He swung the door open and the sight in front of him made his heart skip a beat. Aelin stood there, Elspeth cradled in her arms. The child didn’t look good, her skin was pale and her body seemed to be shuddering. 

“She’s sick,” Aelin said, stating the obvious. 

For a moment Rowan just stood there, trying to process. Then his brain kicked into gear, along with a healthy dose of panic. “What’s wrong?”

“I just need you to drive us to the hospital,” Aelin said, ignoring his question. “Please.”

“Yeah, of course,” Rowan wouldn’t press the issue—not when he could see the urgency of the request. “Just one minute.”

The door swung when it was released but didn’t close but Aelin didn’t bother with entering his apartment. All Rowan did was grab his wallet and keys and then found them waiting in the hallway. Elspeth’s head was now resting on her mother’s shoulder and Aelin swayed in place. There was a bag hanging off Aelin’s arm and taking that small burden was the first thing Rowan did.

Aelin rushed off to the elevator and Rowan followed. He kept a cautious eye on Elspeth, feeling useless as they waited. What he was trying to comprehend was that Aelin had come to him for help. It must have been a real emergency then if she wasn’t going to wait around for someone else. Or maybe, Rowan selfishly thought, this was progress.

The elevator finally arrived and Aelin stepped in, Rowan right behind her hitting the button for the garage. Elspeth coughed and then let out a whimpering cry. It was an awful sound, something in his chest twisted because of it. 

“My keys are in the small pocket, we’ll take my car,” Aelin said, nodding at the bag Rowan held. 

He found the keys, holding them in his hand so he was ready. Rowan wanted more information but he knew this wasn’t the time or place to ask, he would just have to silently manage his building concern. And even though he was being useful, he still felt a little helpless struggling with the unknown. He would drive them to the hospital and then what? What would happen to Elspeth when they got there? Would it just be a short stay or would it be longer? Would Aelin want him to wait? What could he realistically do to help in this situation when they got to the hospital? Rowan could feel the tension in his body building with each new question. 

It wasn’t much longer until they were at the car. Rowan left Aelin to get Elspeth sorted and he dropped into the driver’s seat. His long legs were bent uncomfortably and he pushed the seats back. This brought him back to years ago when he would drive Aelin’s car. He always copped it afterwards if he didn’t put it back to the original position. 

“I know, baby I know,” Aelin murmured as she strapped Elspeth into her car seat while she protested. “I know you don’t want to go but we need to make you feel better.”

Rowan monitored the progress in the rearview mirror. When Aelin sat back and clicked her seatbelt into the buckle he started driving. 

Elspeth whimpered and complained, and he saw her reaching for her mother. Aelin lent over and kissed that little hand and gave Elspeth and her own to hold onto. “You’re okay, Elsie. I know it hurts, but we can make it better. 

Rowan was tempted once again to seek some explanation over what had Elspeth so distressed, but it seemed he didn’t have to. 

“She’s okay,” Aelin said, no doubt noting how Rowan couldn’t stop checking the rearview mirror. “I would have taken her to the doctor but it’s after house and the quickest and easiest way to get her seen is take to the hospital. It’s just a bit of a cold but they hit her pretty hard and I just want to get some things checked.”

“Poor thing.” Rowan couldn’t think of anything else to say. 

“We manage.” 

Those words were clipped and a little defensive and they had no need to be. Rowan wouldn’t come for her over this. Gods, seeing Elspeth so miserable and in obvious pain… Aelin was doing the best that she could. And it would have taken a lot for her to knock on his door for help. It stung a little that she would still assume he would think so negatively about her in that way. 

It was ten minutes more before they reached the hospital and Rowan dropped them as close to the doors as he could. Aelin hadn’t said anything besides thanks before she left so Rowan wasn’t sure what he should do. Maybe he’d just wait in the car, but when he parked he saw the bag that Aelin had been left behind. 

Rowan ended up in the waiting room, the bag keeping him company on the seat beside him. Neither Aelin or Elspeth were in sight, and he was glad that they were seen so quickly. To kill time he mindlessly scrolled through his phone, his mind too muddled to do anything productive. The bag next to him was all the prodding he needed to approach the reception desk and get whatever information they would give him. 

“Excuse me, I was wondering if I could get an update on Elspeth Galthynius?” Rowan asked. 

The woman at the desk gave him a polite smile and then clicked a few things. “She’s been moved to the children’s ward.”

“Her mother left a bag with me, am I right to take it through?” He held up the bag as evidence. 

“No problem, go through.”

“Thanks,” Rowan said and then followed the signage to the children’s ward. 

He was stopped again at those doors and he gave the same story and was let through without much fuss. They had also given him a room number so he kept an eye out for the right one. The door was open and he found Aelin sitting next to Elspeth’s bed, watching her daughter. There was a monitor bandaged to Elspeth’s hand and he noted there was an oxygen apparatus next to the bed that wasn’t being used. Besides that Rowan couldn’t decipher anything about her condition because Elspeth was asleep. Rowan could immediately tell that Aelin was less stressed and that was reassuring. She didn’t look ready to fight the nearest threat anymore, her shoulders were looser, the lines of her face more relaxed. He knocked and then stepped into the room. 

“Hey, I just wanted to see if there was anything else you needed,” Rowan said, handing over the bag.

“Oh,” Aelin looked and sounded exhausted. “Um, no we’re okay.”

“Alright,” Rowan still hesitated. “Is anyone else coming? I can leave your car here and get myself back.” 

“Shit, I didn’t even think of that. Take my car, Fen should be here soon,” Aelin replied, rubbing at her face. “Thank you, again.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Rowan moved closer so he could lower his voice. “What’s wrong?”

Aelin rubbed her hands on her thighs and swallowed hard. “When Elsie was just about four months old she got RSV, it’s a respiratory infection. Since then she’s been more susceptible to reinfection or getting a bad cough when she gets sick. She also has something a little off about the structure of the inside of her ears, so whenever she gets sick we usually get ear aches as well. Just… Overall she gets infections easier so I always want to make sure they get seen and diagnosed right away.”

Elspeth being this unwell explained why she had fallen asleep so suddenly on him the other day. 

“Do they happen often? The earaches?” Rowan asked and Aelin nodded. “I had ear problems too, the eustachian tubes, Right?”

Aelin swallowed again, eyes darting from him to Elsie. “I didn’t know that.”

Rowan took a chance and sat down on the chair next to Aelin, feeling less awkward and imposing. “I used to get horrible earaches, so bad that I still remember them vividly. But I eventually grew out of them.”

Aelin just nodded, eyes fixed on a spot on the floor. They were quiet for a while and then Aelin laughed stiffly. It left Rowan a bit surprised and he didn’t know what he was supposed to respond with. 

“It hurts so much to see her in pain and there’s nothing I can do about it. It’s a sickening kind of helplessness,” Aelin explained. “I try… but it never seems good enough. She wanders off and licks the glass at work or something, or we go to the library and some random kid coughs on her.”

That comment made Rowan huff a small laugh, and to his surprise his response made Aelin lips quirk in a fraction of a smile. But it fell away too quickly and when Aelin looked to where Elspeth slept Rowan could see the unshed tears in her eyes. 

“Last time you saw me I lost her and then there was her almost taking a solo ride in the elevator,” Aelin said. “I don’t know what it is but you seem to keep witnessing my worst mothering moments. I just—”

Aelin broke. Her breath caught and Rowan recognised her tell tale efforts she was dedicating to stop herself from crying. It stunned Rowan for a moment and he was about to tell her that these supposed failings didn’t affect his opinion of her as a mother, but he didn’t get the chance. From what he had seen, Aelin was a dedicated mother, this evening had been proof of that. Right now she was practically shaking—he could see the tremors in her hand from where it rested on the arm of the plastic chair. 

He wasn’t sure what made him do it but he reached and took Aelin’s hand, squeezing it just a little bit. 

“You’re doing great,” Rowan said, hoping she could understand how genuine he was. 

Aelin looked from his hand to his face, reading his open sincerity. She swallowed, and she withdrew her hand to stop tears from rolling down her cheeks. Rowan was searching for something else to say when there was a knock on the door. Aelin’s head jerked towards the door, Rowan looking away from her to send his eyes in the same direction. A pretty doctor stood in the doorway, probably around Aelin’s age, her hazel eyes darting between him and Aelin. 

“Dad, I assume?” she said. 

“No,” Aelin said quickly. “I mean, yes. But no. Gods,” she muttered.

Rowan’s gut twisted at hearing that awful and hurried explanation. He didn’t dare contend it.

“Can we talk outside? I don’t want to wake her.” Aelin stood and was halfway to the door when she stopped. “Is this… you all right with this?”

Meaning being left alone with Elspeth. 

Without hesitation Rowan gave his answer. “No worries, I’ll sit with her.”

An expression filled with mixed emotions appeared on Aelin’s face and then she followed the doctor out the door. Rowan was left alone in the room with Elspeth. It was quiet except for the quiet hum of the machines and Elspeth’s sharp intake of breath every once and a while. She was still asleep, laying on her stomach, her hand with the monitor attached resting beside her head. Her skin was still pale, but there was a rosy flush on her chubby cheeks. Every once and a while she took in a deep breath and it jerked her whole body, making Rowan start every time. He had never seen her this still, she was usually so energetic and it gave him the opportunity to study her. 

She looked so much like Aelin. He could still recall the photos of her as a child that he had seen and Elspeth was like a mini double. But Rowan was also starting to see himself in her too. His mother had been right, the way her brow furrowed was like him and maybe there was something in the shape of her face that was like him. And there were her green eyes, of course. 

Those eyes that opened now, lost and hazy for a moment before they focused on the unfamiliar room and what was weighing down her hand. Elspeth’s face fell, tears quickly gathering.

Rowan was out of his chair in an instant, panicking with the need to calm her down. “Hey, there sweetheart. It’s okay.” 

That did nothing and tears ran down her cheeks as she raised her head up, no doubt looking for her mother. 

“Hey, Elsie, it’s okay,” Rowan said, crouching beside the bed. He realised a moment later that was one of the few times he had said her name. But it seemed to get her attention. “Mum’s just outside, she’ll be right back.”

”Mama,” Elspeth just about squeaked. 

“Yeah, she’s talking to the doctor, she’s still here,” Rowan assured her. 

“Hurts, Rowan.” She remembered him and was saying his name a little better. Elspeth pulled on her ear. “Hurts here.”

So carefully, he pulled her hand away from her ear so that she didn’t irritate it more. “I know, sweetheart.”

Elspeth held onto his thumb, not even trying to go back to her ear. Her hand was so godsdamned tiny compared to his. She didn’t say anything, but did start to cry harder.

”Hey, hey,” Rowan tried to soothe, scrambling for something. “How about a lullaby, one from when I was small?”

She didn’t give a verbal response, just watched him with expectant and wide eyes. Rowan cleared his throat and then started singing. 

Beautiful Dreamer, wake unto me,

Starlight and dewdrops are waiting for thee

Sounds of the rude world heard in the day,

Lull'd by the moonlight have all passed away

Beautiful dreamer, queen of my song,

List while I woo thee with soft melody

Gone are the cares of life's busy throng

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me

Beautiful dreamer, out on the sea,

Mermaids are chanting the wild Lorelei

Over the stream let vapours are borne,

Waiting to fade at the bright coming morn.

Beautiful dreamer, beam on my heart,

E'en as the morn on the stream let and sea;

Then will all clouds of sorrow depart,

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me

Rowan stopped singing and it seemed to have worked. Elspeth breathed a little faster and her eyes fluttered, but she was relaxed and happy. The smile she gave only reached half her mouth with her cheek squished on the mattress. Regardless, it was sweet enough to make Rowan’s chest tighten. It was beautiful in a heartbreaking way. She tried her hardest to keep her eyes open but they stayed close, and just like that she was asleep again. For longer than he should have, Rowan let Elspeth hold onto him, not wanting to lose the small weight of her hand just yet. It was only when he was sure she was soundly asleep and that moving away wouldn’t wake her, he did so. A little regretfully because he had been more than happy to offer her that small comfort as long as she needed it. He sat back in his chair and just waited. 

Aelin came back into the room, shutting the door quietly behind her. “How’d she go?”

”She woke up for a second but then she settled,” Rowan said, some of that awkwardness from before still lingering. 

“Thank you,” Aelin said. 

Rowan couldn’t help the slight smile that tilted his lips, remembering  Elspeth’s little smile. “I was no problem, Aelin.”

“I mean for everything.” 

Rowan took in the way that Aelin stood with her arms crossed, but not with hostility. It was enough of a reprieve to prompt him to ask, “Why me?”

“You were closest,” was Aelin’s simple answer. “I might have been able to drive myself but I would be fretting. Everyone else is on the other side of the city right now and I don’t like to wait, not when it comes to her.”

”I would never have turned you down,” Rowan said. He almost added I hope you know that but Aelin answered before he could. 

But he didn’t need to. “I know that.”

They fell into silence again, slightly awkward, but when weren’t things awkward between them these days? At least they’d expended most of their anger. Aelin shaking her head drew Rowan’s attention, and there was nothing he could think to say. Then he heard hurried footsteps and then the door opened. Fenrys stepped into the room, concern written all over his face. 

“How’s she doing?” Fenrys asked, all his focus on Aelin and Elsie. Rowan wouldn’t have been surprised if his presence was going completely unnoticed. 

“She’s okay,” Aelin said, as Fenrys met her at the foot of the small bed. “It’s her ears again.”

Immediately Fenrys wrapped an arm around Aelin, and it was over her head that Rowan was finally noticed. Fenrys’ dark eyes went a bit wide, but there was no other reaction besides that. Rowan shifted his attention back to Elspeth who was still soundly asleep thanks to his singing. Aelin and Fenrys were conversing quietly and it was apparent that he was no longer needed, so he’d excuse himself and leave. 

“I’ll head back,” he said. “Hope she feels better soon.”

”Thank you, Rowan,” Aelin said again. 

In response Rowan nodded, and with one last look at Elsie, he left. He didn’t get far before he heard his name being called. Turning, Rowan saw Fenrys walking towards him. It gave Rowan a chance to take the other man in—he looked dishevelled, his curls were messy and there was almost a frantic air about him. He must have raced from wherever he’d been, likely getting caught in traffic. 

“Hey,” Fenrys said when he got close enough. “Thanks for bringing them here.”

This was the first civil interaction since the park and, like now, they had been in public. But this time there was no impactful audience here in the hospital hallway. Nothing about what Fenrys was doing right was performative, that much was very clear. 

“Don’t mention it,” Rowan said. “Even if that was the least I could do, I was happy to do it.”

“I know.” Fenrys extended his hand. “I mean it. Thank you.”

This was strange for Rowan. Once upon a time he would have been Aelin’s knight in shining armour, now that role was taken by someone else. Fenrys’ affection for both Aelin and Elspeth was genuine, there was no doubt about that. And Rowan saw the hand shake for the peace offering it was. This was an offer for burying the hatchet once and for all, prompted on by gratitude. 

Rowan had nothing to lose here, and everything to gain. Holding onto this grudge when he didn’t even have the full story of how things ended up the way they had was going to keep him from his goal. Rowan’s priority was Elspeth, any animosity that remained would only cause more damage to everything he was working so hard to build. More than that, seeing the way it had unfolded tonight, how many times had Fenrys been the one to step up when no one else would?

His daughter had benefited from that care and attention. That was the bitter truth of it, because Rowan was not there himself. 

Rowan shook Fenrys’ hand. “It’s all good, Fen.”

Some of that tension lifted from Fenrys’ face, and a soft smile appeared instead as he glanced back to the hospital room. “I’ll let you go.”

”Look after them,” Rowan said and left before he got any kind of reply. 

It was clearer than anything now, Elspeth—and Aelin— had everything they needed. And it wasn’t just a ride home for the hospital. If Rowan left tomorrow, the impact he would leave on Elspeth’s life would be next to nothing. She would go on and forget he existed. That didn’t sit well with Rowan. His daughter didn’t need him but Rowan was beginning to wonder if he was the one that needed her.  

~~~~~

Rowan left and Aelin felt like she could breathe again. She had been thankful for the way he hadn’t even hesitated to get them to the hospital, but there was still so much tension when he was around. 

“I’ll be back in a sec.”

Fenrys left, dropping a kiss on the top of Aelin’s head. She didn’t know what he had to say to Rowan and she was too tired to try and eavesdrop. It didn’t feel like her place to monitor their every interaction, not like it had before. All the volatile feelings that led to adverse reactions seemed to have worked themselves out. That was good, one less thing for her to worry about.

Her boyfriend wasn’t gone too long, and he ended up leading them over to one of the chairs, pulling Aelin down to sit in his lap. She’d been stuck in a trance watching Elsie breathe and hadn’t realised how close her legs were to giving out until they started moving. Aelin leaned into Fenrys, letting the closeness of his body and his steady heartbeat relax her. She dropped down a bit more so she could rest with her feet on the other chair.

“What happened?” Fenrys asked softly. 

Taking in a deep breath Aelin explained everything. Elsie had been rundown for a few days, Fenrys had known that, he’d even been the one to point it out when he picked them up from the shopping mall the other day. It had started with a runny nose, then a cough, then this evening Elsie’s temperature had spiked and the earaches had started. Aelin knew what would happen next, the symptoms would escalate and so would Elsie’s distress. When her daughter was sick she would wind herself so much that it would exacerbate her cough, then she’d vomit and then it would go down from there. At the hospital they could put her on oxygen and give her pain relief, minimising the risk of dehydration and worse.

“Elsie was close to vomiting and I couldn't get her to keep the medicine in her mouth,” Aelin explained. “I weighed my options and Rowan was the best of them.”

”It was good of him to bring you two down,” Fenrys said. “I thanked him for it.”

”I did too,” Aelin said, then she laced her fingers with Fenrys’ and snuggled into his side. “So, it turns out that Elsie’s ear problems were inherited. From him.”

Fenrys huffed out a breath. “Guess that they have more in common than that frown, huh?”

“Mhmm,” Aelin hummed. Then she was silent for a long time, considering if she should say what she was thinking, knowing Fenrys would rally to assuage her doubts. But she couldn’t leave it, not when old insecurities raised their ugly head. “Do you think she might have suffered less if I had of known?”

Just as she knew he would, Fenrys wasn’t hearing a bar of it. “Chances are she would have had the same problems no matter what. Maybe we might have cottoned onto the cause a bit earlier, but don’t beat yourself up about it. Elsie is fine, she always is and always will be as long as you’re her mother.”

Aelin tilted her face up while Fenrys looked down at her. Her boyfriend was full of shit and she was about to tell him so when he stopped down and kissed her. “Don’t start. I’ll always win. I have years of evidence to counter every argument.”

“Fen,” Aelin said, her throat getting tight. “You’re too good to me.”

He kissed her again. “Maybe.”

There was a soft groan from the bed and Elsie stirred, her free hand rubbing at her eyes and she panicked for a moment while she tried to work out where she was. Aelin was instantly moving, sitting on the edge of the bed and smoothing a hand over Elsie’s hair. 

“Hey, I’m here. We’re at the hospital, remember?” 

“Where Rowan?” Elsie asked, raising her head up a bit, but that seemed to disturb her ear which she started pulling at.

Aelin gently pulled that hand away. “He went home.”

Her daughter looked visibly upset by that. “He sung me my song, Mama.”

“He…” it took Aelin a moment to figure it out. The lullaby she had stolen from him. “That was nice of him.”

“He’s my friend,” Elsie said with full confidence, as much as she could be in her sickly state. 

Aelin didn’t know how to take that little bit of news, little did Elsie know that biologically he was much more than that. 

“Uncle Fen!” She said when she saw who was seated behind her mother.

Fenrys gave the girl a smile full of adoration. “Hey there, Pumpkin. Not feeling good?”

Elsie shook her head. “Ears, uncle Fen.”

”We should get rid of them,” Fenrys said, making Elsie gasp.

”No.” she drew out the word, her voice hoarse. 

“I’ll do mine to match.”

Elsie laughed and Aelin smiled along with her. But then her daughter’s demeanour changed to something more serious.

”Home, Mama?”

Aelin shook her head. “Tomorrow, my love.”

Elsie frowned in response, Aelin hated to see her upset.

”Can I come up there and give you a hug?” She asked. 

Elsie nodded enthusiastically, and Aelin cradled her in her arms, rocking back and forth gently. Then she started humming the lullaby again, knowing that it would calm Elsie down immediately. Because Aelin had been singing it for years, ever since that first hospital visit. That lullaby had been one thing she could rely on to soothe her fussy child. While Aelin hummed her way through the tune she tried not to think about the unexpected and lasting effects the father of her child seemed to be having in not just her and Elsie’s lives, but what it might mean for him now as well. 

~~~~~

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#made of ashes #it is 2:16 am I will see you in the next round of mornings for me