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tommyssupercoolblog · 20 days

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Writing Pattern Tag Game

@bootlegfrank tagged me and @septiccoffeefreak - who shares this post w me because we're writing partners >:3 (frank tagged us indirectly. and then directly because i responded saying i was gonna do it. so in-indirect-diretly(??))

Rules: list the first lines(s) of your last 10 fics and see if there's a pattern. I also said where each one is from in case u don't wanna scroll through our ao3 and do the math urself!!!

all these fics except one r RPF, sooo BE WARNED. i'm putting everything under da cut, and i'm also putting my reblog banner since fanfiction!!! is!!! art!!!

Seán’s about ready to burn his entire calendar.

from "Scheduling Conflicts and How To Cope - A Guide For The Busy Homosexual"

Tommy hates LA with every fiber of his being.

from "City Of Angels"

it's cold, and it hurts.

from "The Part Where it Gets Better (Lads rescue AU)", and also THIS SOUNDS SO WEIRD OUT OF CONTEXT LIKE WHAT'S COLD??? it's water. the water is cold. this is the character based one btw. WE FOUND IT, THE NON-RPF!!!

Tommy inspects Seán’s behelit tattoo carefully, running his thumb over it a little, then kisses it.

I fucking would. kissing all his tattoos right now. mwah. this goddamn MOOD is from "There's No Place Like Home"

Ethan N3st0r was not expecting Seán to still be awake at three AM, even though with jet lag considered, he really fuckin should have.

I censored the name for search but it's not like that in the fic, that's just for tumblr. anyway, from "Three Drabbles In Which Tommy and Seán are bad at Keeping Secrets"

Ethan's the one to bring it up first, on Brain Leak, of all things.

OPENING WITH ETHAN AGAIN LMAOO. this is from "And Suddenly, It Makes Sense."

"So, who would have thought, huh? T0mmy1nn1t and Jacks3pt1c3y3, famous YouTubers, passed away in their sleep on the same night."

censored for tumblr again. from "Count your Soulmates- There's only one."

Seán and Tommy have sleepovers sometimes.

from "kissing practice". very original opening line /sar /lh (also tbh i feel awful about em being evil in this one :( I know its fanfic and i can do whatever I want but like. idk. i'm not accusing em of being mean IRL okay??? OKAY))

Seán spends about fifteen minutes pacing and staring at himself in the mirror, doing breathing exercises his therapist taught him and trying not to rub or scratch his wrists too much.

from "Puppy Love", the closest we've ever gotten to full misce posting on main

They were gluing ducks to a jeep the first time it happened.

FROM "PETNAMES" AND ALSO THE BEST OPENING LINE EVER

INTERPRETATION TIME!!!!

soooo yeah!!! we like to jump right into action as well but I think it's safe to say our autistic ass habits of giving exposition for everything lead to the specific outcome of starting in the middle of a scene, WITH an explanation of the scene. like we're already in the middle of something going on but also sometimes it's exposition at the same time somehow?? or like right after these first lines. idk maybe that's just me????

the way it's usually less (character does this) and more (character does this BECAUSE ____ // character is doing this and FEELING ____) feels like it's trying to give context, to me. but again idk maybe just me

TIME FOR SEÁN'S READING:

@septiccoffeefreak - "What I'm noticing here is more along the lines of just, how we almost always seem to open with a person. Usually by their actual name(s) too and not just a pronoun. I understand what you mean, Tommy, but I don't personally get that vibe? You could totally be right, of course, I just don't pick up on that. I defenitely notice, though, just how many of these are sentences where the literal first word is a name. the two exceptions to that are the pronoun "they" (which is still a person- or two people actually), and then water.

I guess the dialogue could also be considered an exception, but I don't think it counts since it also directly references us as characters.

and that's not something you necessarily have to do. You could open describing scenery or objects, or with dialogue that DOESN'T have the names of the characters in it- you could open with wind through a blade of grass or a character cursing under their breath or someone's cellphone crashing to the pavement or something. So it's definitely an "us" thing, it's a quirk of our writing style and not just normal writing. I don't know if like, we ALWAYS do this, but I do know that in these ten fics you pulled we do. I wouldn't be surprised if we did it like literally all the time as well, but I'm not going to pretend to know every first line we've ever penned to paper. or...print?? I don't fucking know, here, I'm just analyzing sentences on the internet for a tagging project.

Sorry if this ramble is kind of long, I hope it's at least interesting though??? sort of interesting? kind of interesting, in it's own way, hopefully. at least mildly, like a video you didn't turn on but aren't really reaching for the mouse/remote on to change it. You know?? Yeah. Like that. Or more interesting then that, hopefully. Thanks for uh, reading or, whatever, listening if you have a screen reader i guess, I'm getting nervous and it's very obvious because i'm rambling so I'm gonna hand things back off to the birthday boy, Toms. wish Tommo a happy birthday or I swear to fucking god your liver will be missing in the morning and you'll find it at the bottom of your morning cup of coffee."

back to me:

LMAO

wow omg i love my babygirl,,,, that made me laugh >:p

ANYWAYS. i didn't notice that!! oh em gee,,,,, name moment.

YOU SHOULD DO THIS TOO AND SEE IF YOUUUU SEE ANYTHING!!!!!

I'M TAGGING @kalcifers-blog AND.... no one else because all my other mutuals who i know for a fact write have paused as far as i'm aware, bc they're into mcyt RPF like I am and the w1lbvr situation put them on hiatus. and i don't know if any of them are back to feeling up to writing stuff.

I don't write about w1bvr ever and didn't watch him so I wasn't that affected but a lot of people were even if they just watched so like... Kalcie ur alone on here i'm SO SORRIE. ALSO this is /nf so u don't have to if u dont want to :p :3 >:D :000 >:PPPP :000 >:00

#i made a textpost #tommy's og art wow #fanfic #rpf fanfiction #rpf #fanfic rpf #rpf fanfic #fanfiction rpf #tagging game #tag game #tag chain #writting pattern tag game #septicinnit #literally all of these RPF fics. are septicinnit

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whumpurr · 4 months

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Wreckx part 3

cw: unlikeable whumpee, stalking, creepy whumpee, male whumpee, autistic whumpee (written by autistic writer), cyberstalking, self hatred, unreliable narrator

masterlist

It was yet another rainy night that he’d decided (on a foolish impulse) to return to Rei’s house. He’d hate for anything bad to happen to her, he told himself. The ride was quick, even though his impending dread attempted to drag it out. In the dim night, he found her house once again.

The lights inside her house were on when he walked down the sidewalk. He continued walking past the house, attempting to at least look like he was just passing by, but something was nagging at him. The lights might be on, but that didn’t mean that anyone was home. She could’ve been kidnapped or worse, for all he knew. He slowed his walk down and squinted, but he couldn’t see anything moving in the house.

“Excuse me?” A soft voice called from behind Wreckx. He jumped, only just managing to smother a yelp. He spun around on his heel, almost toppling over in the process, but righting himself. Rei stood before him.

She was just around his height (so… short) and she was holding something. His eyes followed her hand to see a leash, leading down and attached to a siamese cat on a harness. Just when she couldn’t get any cuter, of course she had to like cats too!

Like the absolutely socially inept weirdo he was, Wreckx forgot that he was standing silently in front of the girl he’d been stalking keeping an eye on. She was just too cute.

“Um, hello?” She asked again. She was starting to get annoyed, Wreckx could tell.

“Hi,” He muttered out, more out of shock than anything else. “Uh, I’m looking for a lost cat,” He fumbled his way through some kind of explanation about his presence. “He’s gray, and pretty big, with short fur… I thought I saw him duck around behind your house so if you could keep an eye out for him that’d be great.”

Wreckx sucked at expressions, but even he could tell that he was making her wildly uncomfortable. He looked past her and pointed, muttering something about how he lived down that direction, and he’d be on his way. She didn’t even look twice when he left, unlike Wreckx, who was practically staring at her the whole way.

Something felt weird. Saying that he felt like someone was watching him would be an overstatement, but it was akin to that. Like the scent in the air was different, like things lined up too well, like the streets were a little too clean. A sense of oddity that nagged at the corners of his brain. It was strange that Rei just happened to be outside the very moment he got there. It was strange that he had a cat, when he was so immeasurably obsessed with cats. Maybe he was overthinking, just like he always did.

The trip back was spent circling what he did in his head over and over again. He agonized over every little detail and was painfully reminded why he didn’t leave his house unless he absolutely had to. He was a freak, a stalker who spent his time building killbots.

Said killbot greeted him at the door, the large robot cat giving a metallic fake purr, just like it’d been programmed to. Wreckx pet it on the head before flopping into bed, boots left in the middle of the bedroom along with most of his clothing.

What the fuck was he thinking going out there? He was a weirdo, no wonder she looked so uncomfortable.

His stomach ached to think about Rei at all. She was fucking attractive.

Fuck. He dragged his hands down his face. Wreckx had become a broken shell of the person he once was when his ex had dumped him. He still wasn’t over her, even though it’s been so long. He had been working on convincing himself that he would just have to be alone forever, and that he would have to be okay with that, but Rei made his diligent thoughts stray. She made him think about a future with someone who would understand him and- just maybe- accept him.

No, that was delusional. What kind of fucking numbskull idiot idea is that? Who would ever even look twice at him?

As soon as he hit the bed, he shut his eyes. It would be easier to simply sleep than to stay up ruminating on what a fuck up that whole interaction was. Maybe he could even forget about it. If he was lucky enough, it wouldn’t pop up in his dreams.

Ding.

Wreckx didn’t know what time it was when he woke up. He hauled himself off of his bed and into his computer chair, squinting at the bright screen in front of him. Another message. Of course, it was from AnonyMouse.

“How is the star hacker doing?” They asked, followed by “We have another job for you, if you want it.”

Wreckx typed ‘yes’ before he could even think. Any desire to not appear desperate was squashed out by his actual desperation.

“Good boy. Are you familiar with college fraternities?”

“In passing.”

Wreckx recalled that his college had a fraternity, but he was too much of a loser nerd to ever be involved with anyone from them (or, anyone in general).

“We need information on a few people in one of them. The frat’s actually in your city, how convenient.”

Wreckx waited patiently for the relevant information to be relayed. The new target was Jesse Lott. He’d be at a frat party this coming weekend, and that would be the perfect opportunity for Wreckx to sneak in and gather information.

“Wait, wait, I’m not some kind of femme fatale, I hack. I don’t sneak into places.” He quickly typed back as soon as he pieced together what was being asked.

“We could go to someone else then, if you think you are incapable.”

Wreckx swallowed. The amount of money being offered this time was more than what he got for Rei’s information, and that first task covered his rent for the month easily. He messaged AnonyMouse, letting them know he’d take their job.

“Obedient. That’s good. Get into the party, we want information on Jesse Lott, Gabriella Fisher, and Oscar Wright. Copy their phone data and hand it over to us, and get footage of them at the party. They’re 17, you see. Their parents would love to know what their kids get up to on the weekends, hm?”

Seventeen years old. Wreckx was twenty three. He didn’t quite like the thought of gathering information on people that young, but he had to. Whatever, he could just do it quickly and not think about it ever, ever again.

With that, AnonyMouse terminated the connection.

There were a number of things Wreckx was uncomfortable with this time. He didn’t want to stalk a pack of seventeen year olds. He didn’t want to infiltrate a frat party (he could never get invited to one, how could he ever be convincing?), and he didn’t want to have to mingle with the people who would go to a frat party. He was disgusted at the thought of it all.

On top of that, AnonyMouse hadn’t even discussed any sort of pricing with him. However Wreckx did believe that they would pay whatever he asked for. Maybe this time he’ll push the price higher in order to make up for all this bullshit.

In the grand scheme of things, underaged drinking wasn’t the worst thing he has dealt with. Usually when people want Wreckx’s services, they want him to do borderline breaking and entering, or snoop on someone from afar. He’s taken far worse photos than some guys at a party. He’s hacked into women’s phones in the changing room. He’s sold out the locations of people evading bounty hunters. He’s scraped data from phones, laptops, and credit cards. He was scummy almost to the point of being despicable. So just why was this getting under his skin so badly?

The next week was spent trying to figure out something to wear and how he would behave once he arrived. A t-shirt and jeans was his go to, and he just had to hope that nobody would bat an eye if they spotted him in there. He could probably sneak in through the back door, if nobody was standing near it.

When the day finally rolled around, Wreckx found himself leaving his apartment with a pit of disgust and dread in his stomach.

taglist: @whumpinthepot

#whump blog #whump #pet whump #whumpee #whumpblr #whump community #whump writing #my writing #wreckx #cyberpunk whump

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mar64ds · 1 year

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JEVIL

where do i begin with my funny little friend... jevil is a character that i have always thought was really fun: a secret difficult boss fight, a mysterious connection to gaster and overall i think he has a really funny personality, i've always really liked him! he wasn't my favorite character and i don't think i was as invested in this character as everyone else was in 2018, back when he was the most mysterious character that we had met so far, but when chapter 2 came out i kind of started to appreciate jevil more? Since we were all so focused on new content that made me remember how much i liked chapter 1 and my love for jevil grew more

I have always really liked his relationship with Seam even if we never see them actually interacting, I have mentioned before that they just seem to me like they would have a very Sam&Max dynamic asdfghjkl and i always like duos like that they are funny and endearing. And adding all that tragedy to their relationship makes it even stronger, I just really like these two and I don't care how their relationship is interpreted they are companions and i like them and if they don't talk to each other in the game again i will break my computer

I focus on him and Seam the most but Jevil is a character that is really fun to make interact with anyone, some based on canon material and others just fun concepts

I think the idea of him and Susie becoming friends (perhaps even family) is so sweet to me, these two have so many parallels and I love the way they interact, Susie is very blunt with him and that doesn't bother Jevil at all, they are two sharks prepared to fight!!

I personally like to think him and Gaster were genuine friends, that Gaster didn't mean for Jevil to end up the way he did, that they both just wanted a friend...

Him and Spamton are really funny, wacky cartoon characters in one room together what could go wrong, funny exes. I know I don't focus a lot on them but I like them and some very talented artists make such cool content of them that it makes appreciate them more, keep up the good work everyone

Jevil mentions Queen once but I really like to believe they got along really well, that maybe all the other kings were stuck-ups but she was always the one who found him funny the most..... 🥹 I think they are friends :)

Now for relationships that are completely made-up by me? Jevil and Toriel, they are friends to me, they are such close friends. Heartache used to be Jevil's theme!!!! They both like jokes!!!! They both have horns!!!!! They both feel trapped and lonely!!!!! They could be best of friends. I also think him and Papyrus could have really interesting interactions, they are both positive people, just two different kinds of positivity

Jevil is a secret boss that doesn't get much screen time and we barely know ANYTHING about him, so a lot of my headcanons are just based on what I believe he COULD have been like or could be like at the moment, it's all pure speculation and having fun with a character i like and that i think has a lot of potential, he's slowly just becoming an OC at this point lol. I like to believe he was a little prankster as a kid and the funny kid on school but he didn't have many friends, when he was a teen he goes through his 'emo phase' and tries to pretend he doesn't care about being a funny little jester anymore and focuses more on his 'grim reaper' style (and the reason why he does this it's not just because it's a funny idea it's because he's tired of being rejected for being so 'different', he's masking pretty much), when he's a young adult he goes back to trying to be a funny jester and he ends up becoming the court jester!! The rest is history and I think he meets Seam after he has been the court jester for a little while

I see Jevil as trans, ace and aroflux! Autistic as well! Jesters and rubber ducks are two of his biggest special interests, he stims with his hat, tail and hands and has a a chew stim toy in the shape of a spade! He of course also vocally stims all the time! He repeats words often and likes to imitate sounds. And I also really like the idea that he has a lisp!

This might sound silly but Jevil has helped me a lot with my confidence towards my autism this last year? Papyrus too, they both have helped SO much. I don't know, i'm a very insecure person and sometimes i think i'm extremely childish (not as in... a mean childish attitude, i mean having childish interests and things like that) or sometimes i can just feel very different from everyone around me, and thinking about Jevil i don't know makes me happy? Like i get it he's the court jester but he's a guy that likes playing games like roundabout and things like that, and he vocally stims all the time and it's established that he was very lonely but the people that cared about him? They cared, they cared a lot, he was someone that was missed. And uh... wow that means a lot i'm going to explode and cry

Anyway, i like jevil, worst character ever

#YOU UNLEASHED THE JEVIL INFODUMP WHAT HAVE YOU DONE #(thanks anon)#deltaruneundertale

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narcissasdaffodil · 2 years

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Marisol of the character bingo! ♥

Hi Sofi! Thank you so much for the ask.

To no surprise here, I easily managed bingo for Marisol, not once but twice! I’ll take any excuse to ramble about her, and there’s no way in hell this will fit in the tags! It’s super late, and I’m doing this instead of sleeping but it’s definitely worth it. My ramble probably makes next to no sense, but if you read it, hopefully you get something from it.

Marisol’s absolutely gorgeous, I fell head over heels for her when she first made an appearance. If heart eyes were a real thing, I definitely had them for her. I’ve adored her for nearly three years, which is wild.

Whoever decided to link up hers and Elisa’s route was awful, let me say that much. I haven’t been able to manage Elisa’s route because of my Mari crush. And linking up their routes is very unfair to both of them, and I’m definitely still bitter over that. Also, having her get booted off with Graham or Bobby on all other routes other than her own isn’t great. When I do my Lucas routes, I want to have her there for the final. It’s very sad that I can’t.

She’s a very polarising character too. I absolutely adore her, of course. But she’s definitely one of those who you either love or hate, and she gets so much hate from people in general. She’s very underrated, I get so excited when I find fellow stans of her as they seem to be fairly rare. I understand her reasoning for Roccogate, and Graham in a way. I might not be a fan of either of those two, but I get where she’s coming from. Her route has major ups and downs, and she easily made me jealous with Graham. I adore slow burn routes, and she definitely has her moments where she infuriated me a bit, but I understand where she’s coming from at the same time.

I relate to her so much, we definitely share a brain. And yes, I see autistic traits in her as well, along with anxiety. I’ve seen those reflected from me and I have a major autistic headcanon for her. I’m literally the real life version of her in appearance especially. The main differences are: I’m much taller than her, with green eyes, a fringe and have a nose piercing. And she’s a lot prettier than me, I feel like a human potato compared to her. Personality wise, she’s one of the ones I share the most with.

She would definitely intimidate me slightly, and I would be a little doubtful whether she’d notice me in general. I’m pretty boring compared to her, but if she pushed through my spikes to get to my sweet centre, then we’ll be great together. Yes, that’s definitely a pineapple metaphor! Couldn’t resist, as it is I, the human pineapple! Also my love of ducks, and duck photography would give me a leg up with her. I have over 200 photos of just ducks, and geese, and seagulls. Essentially a lot of bird photos, which would help for Duck of the Day.

As for the dynamic one, she’s excellent with Hope and Lucas especially. I adore both Hopisol and Lucisol, and recently also I fell for Henisol too. She’s very, very shippable, but I definitely have my favourite dynamics for her too. I could go on forever why Hope and Lucas would fit well with her both romantic and platonically. Essentially, they’re career minded people who don’t want kids and fit well in personality. Plus my headcanoning that Lucas and Marisol are so cat people! Maybe because I’m one too, or because I can sniff out fellow cat people.

She’s far deeper than she seems, and definitely deserves more screen time. She vanishes completely if you’re not on her route and has a too early exit, which I’ve already talked about. People are more likely to judge her for her mistakes, and her psychoanalysing people is something else people judge her for. I understand that it would get irritating, but to some extent, I have to try to read people myself. I think the psychoanalysis is likely a defence mechanism, she maintains a lot of walls which you need to push past, but she’s wonderful once you get past that. People just focus on her stereotypes, but she’s much more than that. Because I see her anxious and autistic traits, I’m able to work out why she makes the decisions she does. She’s also pretty blunt, and can come across cold, which so am I!

I’ve written so much for her fic wise, and made so much content for her in general that I feel like I know her as well as I know myself. She’s one of my comfort characters, and writing for her feels wonderful, and easy. I got through a 329k Villa fic for her, which was quite an ordeal. I’ve grown so much as a writer since I started Love Can Be Chosen, and I’m proud of myself for pushing past the people who insisted I was crap at writing. She gave me back the gift of writing which I’m thankful for.

#litg #litg marisol #asks #answered asks #bingo

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sasarahsunshine · 3 years

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[Tw (happy) venting 💞 ]

I am autistic and have PTSD and school was always really hard for me so my therapist suggested someone coming along. (I don't know what the translation for this specific job is. Where I come from english isn't the main language)

And I was really sceptical because I have only seen that with kids in elementary school and then the person would just sit in the back of the class and not give a damn and I didn't see how that would help me but she said we could just invite him for therapy ones and I could just get to know him and he was really nice but I was not really convinced about this helping me to go to school but she said to give it a try and when it makes me uncomfortable I could tell her and he would be gone in an instant. And I trust her. She is always very nice and she keeps her promises. 😊

So I got to know him for a few sessions and we discussed some issues I have at school which was really scary for me, because I don't tell anyone expect for her but he was really nice about it and he suggested to get some icecream together after the session and there it wasn't so uncomfortable and strict and he was very nice but I still didn't get how he would help me at school so I was really scared on the first day he came to school with me. But he offered to sit down next to each other which was not what I expected but it was nice and the girl I normally said next to just said down on the table next to us with her friend and obviously it was uncomfortable first because people kept looking. (I have mostly nice classes though) And I was still very unsure but he was just sitting there but I thought he is just gonna be a silent watcher but when a teacher tried grabbing my sheets he placed a hand on them and was just looking up to him saying that he should grab someone elses and that I wouldn't like it and I was just very surprised because I don't but I didn't figure he would actually do that nor care about so little things.

So I learned with in the first days that he is not a silent observer but very much helping. Now teachers don't make me talk and when I want to participate I can write it down and he then shares with the class when I got called up and he helps me calm down so quickly and when I got overwhelmed he took me out of class and we went to a park nearby and watched and feed ducks (they are very adorable🥰) and when I asked when we have to go back he said that we don't have to for the day if I don't want to. Which was surprising because I thought his job was to make me go to school.

And he really helps with my exams because I tend to get panic attacks there but he was really nice and helped me stay focused and when another student accused him of helping me he told them that even if he wanted to, there is not a single italian word in his head he could help me with and then he leaned down to me and whispered "idiot" which was funny because I in the beginning thought he would be like a teacher but he actually is on my side and even when I told him about a problem with a teacher and he didn't understand it at first, he was still doing what I asked him for and not what the teacher wanted which felt really good because he stood up for me, even though he had a different opinion and rather waited on an explanation than to just dismiss it.

And when I got scared because an alarm went of from a car outside the room and that is a trigger for me and I grabbed his arm and I thought he was gonna be mad at me but he sat down on the floor with me and pulled me in a really tight hug which was nice because that felt safe and I didn't know he was allowed to do that because most people besides from my best friend scare away from me then. But even when I got really frustrated he didn't make me feel dumb and just took me out of gym class and helped me calm down and when I told him that I felt very angry and that he makes me angry (I feel very sorry for that, that was not true) and I said a lot of bad stuff he didn't leave me alone and that was very patient and nice of him because when I was done saying all that awful things, he just let me cry in his arms and we talked about what triggered me and even if I was so mean he still went to my gym teacher and asked him about if he could avoid those type of games for a few weeks until I learned to deal with it better.

I wanted to get this off here because I was really scared first but now it's fine and maybe that takes some fear of others away. ❤️ The first few days I thought my heart was going to explode from so much anxiety but now I just feel very good with that decision.

(I showed him some criminal minds TikToks and he started watching it and now he tells me when he watched more episodes and then I can tell him all the funfacts and things I read about the episodes which is really cool because he lets me ramble as much as I want in breaks (his favorite character is Derek and he told me I am a mix of Hotch and Spencer which is very cool🥰))

Okay so I might have cried??? While reading this???

Tbh I have no idea what the english word would be for what he is for you, but he sounds kind of like an aide of some kind? Like a human version of an emotional support dog—and I love him!! He sounds like an amazing guy and I’m SO HAPPY your therapist paired him with you!! It sounds like she knows you pretty well too <3

I’m so happy that you’re now doing so much better in school! And I’m proud of you for all you’ve accomplished so far (even with a little help <3)!!

The bit about the ducks ;w; And him standing up for you and just—ah! I love all of this!!

(Also I find people who love Derek to be very good people <3 And I’m glad he shares an interest with you now so you can talk to him about it!!)

Thank you for telling all of this to me. You seriously made my night, and I’m smiling like an idiot over here!! 🥰

#sarah replies #ask #anon #happy vent #vent ask #autism #ptsd #tw triggers #not cm

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yeah-klave · 3 years

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The Sexual Awakening of David Joseph Katz - Chapter 8

Link to Chapter 1 || Link to Chapter 2 || Link to Chapter 3 || Link to Chapter 4 || Link to Chapter 5 || Link to Chapter 6 || Link to Chapter 7

Series summary: A multi-chapter journey of self-discovery and sexual awakening.

Chapter summary: Dave tries something new.

Genre: Developing relationship, smut. (18+ only, please)

A/N: This is set in a nothing-too-bad-happens modern AU. The characters are all in their early twenties (I’m picturing adult!actor versions of them and Dave as a (younger) Cody Ray Thompson). The siblings are all still living at home, relatively happily, and Dave, Lila, Sissy and Carl are friends who hang out with them at the Academy.

Word length: 5.2k

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of The Umbrella Academy characters or settings.

*******************************************************

It was the weekend. Klaus and Dave had spent the day hanging out with Diego, Ben and Luther.

They’d driven out of the city to a hiking trail and explored for a bit, then set themselves up on a rickety jetty to do some fishing in a nearby lake.

Ben had rolled his eyes at Diego and Luther’s competitive sniping, but all three had ended up blaming Klaus for scaring away all the fish after he got board of sitting quietly and decided to dip his toes in the water and attempt to splash the serious look of concentration off Dave’s face. He succeeded.

Nobody ended up catching any fish.

In the afternoon, they returned to the Academy to chill and – at Dave’s insistence – have a Star Wars movie marathon.

At one point, Five wandered through the living room. He paused to roll his eyes fondly at the slouching heap of limbs they had become, before heading off in the direction of the bar. They heard clinking, them a few moments later he wandered back out, distractedly muttering something about quantum mechanics and clutching a Margarita topped with a little blue cocktail umbrella.

At some point during the second movie, Ben extracted himself and wandered off to a quiet nook to do a little reading and, shortly afterwards, Luther left to go pick up Allison from the mall, where she’d been shopping with some girlfriends.

Bored again from too much sitting, Klaus had come up with a game that involved passing random objects between them without letting them touch the floor, using only their feet.

With the movie still playing in the background, they’d been passing Dave’s balled-up hoodie between them for a solid twenty minutes when Diego’s phone pinged and he missed the pass from Klaus, letting the hoodie fall to the floor.

“Dude!” Klaus exclaimed, hands raised.

Diego shrugged and checked his phone.

“It’s Lila inviting me over,” he said. “Her roommate’s out of town.”

“Booty call,” Klaus grinned, winking at Diego and conspiratorially nudging Dave with his elbow. “Sounds like you’re in there, bro.”

Diego grimaced back. “More like, she’s bored of being on her own without anyone to tease, so she’s calling sparring partners to her.”

“If that really was the case,” Dave said, “and all she wanted was an argument, she’d just text Carl.”

“Ha! True!” Klaus barked a laugh. “He’d definitely take the bait. He’s been in such a pissy mood recently.” Klaus made a lewd gesture, “I don’t think he’s getting any from Sissy.”

“I don’t think you can blame Sissy for Carl’s foul mood,” Dave added sagely.

“Definitely not!” Klaus said, “it’s not her fault her boyfriend’s a prick.”

“To be fair,” Diego cut in, “she’s been pretty busy recently with that volunteering group she and Vanya signed up for. You know, the one with the music therapy for autistic kids.”

Klaus and Dave shared a glance and Dave had to duck his head quickly to hide his smile.

“Yeah,” Klaus said slowly, “Sissy and Vanya have been busy with the… volunteering. Recently, in particular, they’ve both got very… busy. Together.”

Engrossed in his phone, Diego didn’t notice the knowing grin that passed between Klaus and Dave.

“Maybe I shouldn’t go,” Diego mused, “maybe it gives her too much power. Coming when she calls, I mean. I don’t want her to get the wrong idea.”

“Don’t you mean get the right idea?” Klaus smirked.

“Shut up,” Diego scowled, “I’m not her lap dog.”

Klaus caught Dave’s gaze and rolled his eyes. “Honestly, these Straights,” he said with a mock exasperated sigh, “they have such complicated relationships.” He turned to Diego and levelled him a challenging look. “Seriously, brother mine, you need to let that girl peg the toxic masculinity right out of you. You might have a clearer perspective on the whole thing after you’ve let her fuck you ‘till your true bratty bottom personality starts showing. I bet you’d find it quite liberating to let her watch you shake apart while your ankles are in the air and your knees are up by your ears.”

Diego let out a strangled choking sound.

“But if you’re too much of a sissy to let a woman top you,” Klaus added, “I’d highly recommend levelling up and finding a nice guy to fuck you instead. Tits are nice and all that – but you just can’t beat a big, hard dick. So go find yourself one of them. Just not the one attached to him,” Klaus winked at Dave, “because that one’s spoken for.”

Dave grinned fondly, rolling his eyes.

“I don’t even know where to start with that,” Diego said with a grimace.

“Well,” Dave said evenly, “personally, I’d recommend starting with a bit of dry humping. Then, when you finally get your hands around it, you can start working it properly. Maybe fondle the balls a bit.”

“Dave!” Diego said shocked. “That’s… you… don’t say things like that.” He looked between Klaus and Dave, scandalised. “He’s having a bad effect on you, Dave.”

“He’s had an effect alright,” Dave said, catching Klaus’ eye, “a big, prominent, pointed effect.”

“Seriously, dude,” Diego grimaced, “I don’t want to hear this.”

“Oh, quit whining,” Klaus chuckled. “We all know you ship us hard.”

“So hard,” Dave added.

“So, very, very hard.” Klaus giggled. “As hard as we make each other.”

“Oh, dear god!” Diego cringed, covering his ears with his hands. “Mental images! Forcing their way into my brain. Cannot un-think!”

Klaus and Dave both laughed.

“Well, on that note, I’m off.” Diego patted himself down checking for his keys and started towards the door. “I’d rather be at Lila’s beck and call than listen to anymore of this. You reprobates stay safe now. And for God’s sake, don’t cum on anything, please!”

“Don’t worry,” Klaus called after him. “We swallow.”

“La-la-la! NOT LISTENING!” Diego called back, hands over his ears again as he left, the front door to the Academy clicking shut behind him.

Klaus caught Dave’s eye and Dave raised an eyebrow and asked simply, “So, shall we?”

And Klaus barked a laugh. “Hell, yes!” he said, pulling Dave to his feet.

They ran upstairs and stumbled down the corridor to Klaus’ room, laughing and kissing and fumbling, hands pulling off clothes and blindly knocking into furniture in their haste.

“Diego’s really going to appreciate the trail of discarded clothing leading to your room,” Dave smiled, glancing over Klaus’ shoulder.

“Don’t care,” Klaus breathed, his lips pressing kisses along Dave’s jaw. “To be honest, Grace will probably pick it all up before he sees anyway.” Dave’s eyes widened in panic, but Klaus took the lobe of Dave’s ear into his mouth and sucked, and Dave’s mind blanked. He shivered and Klaus grinned, grazing his teeth along the flesh.

The door to Klaus’ room was barely shut behind them before Klaus was sinking to his knees in front of Dave, hands scrambling to unbuckle his pants.

Dave rested his head back against the door and allowed Klaus to pull his pants and boxers down, but before Dave had chance to step out of them, Klaus was leaning forwards eagerly and taking Dave into his mouth.

Dave groaned, long and low, both his hands going to Klaus’ head, fingers carding through the unruly curls, fingernails raking slowly and seductively along the scalp. He then tugged gently, in just the way he knew Klaus loved and Klaus hummed in delight. The vibrations sent a wave of pleasure through Dave and he sighed out Klaus’ name. Klaus hummed again, then started sucking and bobbing his head in earnest, his hands steadying Dave’s hips.

Dave closed his eyes and let the feelings overtake him. Klaus was setting a delicious rhythm, with just the right level of suction. His mouth was hot and wet and perfect. Dave could feel Klaus breathe out as he relaxed his throat and took Dave down deeper.

“Oh, Klaus…” Dave moaned, gently tugging on his hair again. “That’s so good.”

Klaus hummed again and, fighting the impulse to gag, took him down ever further.

“Oh, yes!” Dave sighed. “Oh Klaus, your mouth feels so good.” His brain fuzzy, the praises spilled off his lips, “Yes, oh you’re so good at that. It feels amazing. You feel amazing. You’re amazing.” Dave could feel the pressure building, the knot tightening. Klaus kept bobbing and sucking. “Oh yes, there, like that. Klaus! Oh yes, yes.”

Dave twitched his hips slightly and Klaus gave an almost imperceptible nod and squeezed his fingers, signalling that Dave could thrust forwards. Dave let out a strangled little sound and – ever so gently – started fucking Klaus’ mouth. Klaus moaned, his pupil’s blown and his chin wet.

Dave let out a low grunt and concentrated on the feeling of the tiny thrusts of his hips – the raw, decadent pleasure of pushing his cock into his partner’s willing mouth. The slightly strangled moans coming from Klaus were needy and wanton and desperate. The act felt so… base. So… primal. To Dave, it felt… unimaginably good.

Dave savoured the feeling, storing it away to be examined and replayed at another time, another place.

Klaus squeezed Dave’s hips again and then took him all the way down into his throat, swallowed, then hummed. And Dave felt the vibrations rumble through him in a heady wave. His fingers twitched and his hips bucked involuntarily.

Klaus chocked. Just a little. “Sorry, sorry,” Dave said, contrite. He only felt slightly guilty for the sudden rush that had surged through him at the sight and sound of Klaus choking on his cock.

Klaus hummed in response, picking up the pace of his bobbing, cheeks hollowed and his tongue working the underside. His thumb ran soothingly over Dave’s hipbone and even in his state of fuggy pleasure, Dave knew it was a sign of reassurance.

Half out of his mind with pleasure, Dave looked down and took in the sight of Klaus; cheeks hollowed, his lips stretched wide around Dave’s cock, the gentle sway of his wild curls as he bobbed his head. His eyelashes were dark fans over eyelids heavy from desire. Dave felt a proprietary surge of pleasure as he noticed the beginnings of dark streaks on the pale, delicate skin under Klaus’ bottom lashes, where the slight wetness around his eyes had caused his eyeliner to run.

Dave gave another low groan. He could feel himself tensing, his pleasure cresting. “Klaus!” he managed to grunt.

Klaus pulled back and off with a wet pop, a line of saliva still connecting them. He began fisting Dave’s length. He opened his mouth wide, stuck out his tongue and rested Dave’s tip on the wet, pink muscle. He looked up: open and willing and eager. Ready to be claimed, though Dave.

Eyelids heavy and eyes dark with lust, Klaus gazed up at Dave through his lashes. And, staring down into Klaus’ eyes, Dave’s pleasure crested and his orgasm crashed over him like a tidal surge. He came undone, pulsing and releasing, thick creamy ropes of cum landing over Klaus’ tongue and his lips and his chin and his cheek. Klaus closed his eyes and took it, hand still working Dave’s shaft, helping him ride out his high. And Dave just kept cumming, all over his boyfriend’s face and tongue and a bit in his hair. And it felt so dirty, but also so brilliant. And his brain thrummed: mine, mine, mine…

Dave’s cock gave a final weak pulse and Klaus licked the small trickle of cum off the tip.

Dave looked down and blushed at the sight of Klaus on his knees before him, his cheeks flushed, chin wet, face splattered with cum and his hair sticking up wildly from where Dave had been gripping the dark curls.

“Oh, Klaus” he whispered reverently. And Klaus smiled and gently kissed the tip of Dave’s cock one last time before getting to his feet.

Dave’s thumb came up to Klaus’ bottom lip and smeared a spot of cum across the skin. Klaus’ tongue came out to taste it, but Dave leaned forwards quickly and caught Klaus’ lips in a kiss, tasting himself on Klaus’ skin and in the slow slide of their lips and tongues.

“So, I guess we didn’t do what Diego asked after all,” Dave smiled.

“Pretty sure he meant the sofas, or in the kitchen or something,” Klaus grinned. “I don’t think it counts if the thing you’re cumming on is me.” Dave groaned again. Then reached blindly, grabbed his discarded tee and lightly wiped the mess off Klaus’ face. Then he brought their faces close until the tips of their noses were touching and brushed them together in an Eskimo kiss.

Dave stepped forwards, trying to walk Klaus back to the bed but, forgetting about his pants still pooled around his ankles, he almost overbalanced. Klaus laughed and held his arms steady while Dave toed off his boots and socks and stepped out of his jeans. Klaus’ pants had been abandoned somewhere on the trip from the living room to Klaus’ bedroom.

Dave gently placed his hands on Klaus’ immaculate chest and walked him back to the bed, softly pushing him down onto his back. Klaus shuffled backwards, laying his head on the pillow. He was toned and sun-golden and glorious, his erection a prominent bulge tenting his underwear. He’s gorgeous, Dave thought. Completely gorgeous and all mine. And a thrill ran through him.

Dave got onto the bed and pulled Klaus’ underwear off. And then Klaus was spread out before him: standing big and stiff and proud. A meal Dave wanted to both devour all at once… and also savour for the rest of his life.

Dave crawled over Klaus, propping himself up on his forearms so he could bring their lips together again. Klaus sighed and ran one hand down Dave’s spine, resting the other on his backside and squeezing.

“Ass man,” Dave breathed into Klaus’ mouth.

“Bite me,” Klaus smiled back, and Dave caught his bottom lip between his teeth and nipped lightly. Klaus groaned and pushed his hips up against Dave.

Dave grinned and rolled them over. He slotted his leg between Klaus’, presenting his thigh for Klaus to ride. Klaus propped himself up on his arms and pushed his hips down, grinding his erection into Dave’s deliciously solid thigh. He breathed out a sigh and leaned down to continue their kiss, his hips pressing forwards rhythmically. Dave pushed his tongue into Klaus’ mouth and let the kiss get dirty, his hands kneading Klaus’ ass cheeks as Klaus humped his leg. The room was filled with the sound of Klaus panting and grunting and the dull thunk of the headboard against the wall as Klaus increased the pace and vigour of his rutting.

“Look at you,” Dave breathed, eyeing Klaus’ slack mouth and flushed cheeks, “just look at you. So beautiful.”

“Dave,” Klaus gritted out.

“Oh, is there something you need, sweetheart?” Dave teased.

“Yes,” Klaus panted, a little frustrated and desperate to get off.

Dave raised an eyebrow but made no other attempt to move.

“Oh,” Klaus whined, “Dav-uh!”

Dave grinned wickedly, “Maybe you should ask nicely?”

Klaus’ eyes went wide. For a heart stopping moment, Dave thought he might have gone too far, might have misread the vibe, might have killed the moment.

But then Klaus flushed, blinking rapidly, and whispered, “Dave, please.” Dave squeezed his ass cheeks again and Klaus whined and clamped his thighs around Dave’s leg, grinding his erection down harder. “Please,” he repeated in a small, broken voice, “please do something to get me off.” He brought his lips to Dave’s ear, so close Dave could feel his lips moving, and murmured, “please, Mr Katz…”

Dave swallowed hard. A rush of adrenaline, and also something else – something deeper and more primal – ran through him. He could feel the soft, warm weight of his partner, writhing and rutting against him. Needy and desperate. Needy, for him. Dave was suddenly overwhelmed by an instinctive, primal urge to give and please and protect and provide. Mine, Dave thought again. He’s mine.

Dave hooked his leg around Klaus’ and flipped them over. He pressed one final searing kiss to Klaus’ lips and then worked his way down Klaus’ body, trailing kisses down his neck and chest, his tongue flicking over the hardened nub of a nipple. He teasingly kissed his way down the faint trail of dark hairs that started just below his navel and ended at the base of Klaus’ cock.

Dave could feel Klaus breathing deeply, his chest rising and falling in anticipation. But rather than turning his attention to Klaus’ erection. Dave dipped his head lower, and pressed kisses and teasing licks into the delicate skin surrounding Klaus’ cock. He pressed his nose against Klaus’ balls, nuzzling them slightly, then opened his mouth and sucked as much as he could into his mouth, applying delicious pressure and working the skin with his tongue. Klaus whined above him. Dave repeated the action, then moved onto the other.

“Dave,” Klaus panted. “Dave, please.”

A thought started buzzing in Dave’s brain. It felt electric – live and shocking.

Without quite realising he’d done it, Dave made a decision. He felt wired and alive and empowered.

Dave smiled and rose onto his knees. His hands went to Klaus’ hips. “Roll over,” he said gently.

“What?” Klaus’ head came up, eyes slightly unfocussed.

“Come on,” Dave repeated quietly, “roll over.”

“Dave? What’re you…” Klaus looked confused.

“I want to try something,” Dave smiled. He felt a shy, nervous flutter in his stomach, but he swallowed, caught Klaus’ eye and gave a confident little nod.

Klaus held his gaze a moment, eyes wide, but then he obliged, rolling onto his front. Dave encouraged him to spread his legs and lift onto his knees and elbows. Dave sat back for a second and just took in the sight before him: his boyfriend bent over on his bed, flushed and hard and slightly bewildered, but presenting himself so beautifully for Dave. Dave licked his lips and smiled. He was going to enjoy this.

Klaus’ head hung between his arms and he craned around to look at Dave admiring him and – despite all his previous experience – he still felt a small spike of self-conscious embarrassment. He shifted and started to get up, “Dave, what’s… what’re you doing…?”

“Shhh,” Dave reassured, his hand rubbing soothing circles into Klaus’ lower back and encouraging him back down. “It’s okay. Just relax. I’ve got this. I’ve got you.”

Klaus narrowed his eyes slightly but relaxed back down.

Dave positioned himself between Klaus’ legs and ran his hands over Klaus’ ass cheeks, endearingly pale against the tan of the rest of his skin. He gave the right one a quick pat and squeeze. Lowering his head slowly, he pressed a gentle kiss into the soft, fleshy centre of each cheek. Then, using his thumbs, he spread the cheeks apart, finally revealing Klaus’ pink, furled hole.

“Dave…?” He heard Klaus choke out.

Dave blew a soft stream of warm air onto Klaus’ little rosebud and watched as it clenched slightly.

Then, leaning forwards, he brought his face in close and slowly licked across Klaus’ tight hole.

“Fuck!” He heard Klaus exclaim.

Dave smiled and, tongue soft and wet and wide, he repeated the action.

“Oh, Dave! Oh, fuck!” Klaus panted again.

Dave pointed his tongue and flicked it up and down, and left to right, brushing it quickly over the delicate skin. Dave could feel Klaus’ hole fluttering under his tongue.

“Dave! Oh god, yes, oh yes!” Klaus panted. He shifted his hips and repositioned his arm to take his weight. He brought the other hand down to his cock, which was hanging thick and heavy and neglected between his legs. But before he could take hold of it, however, Dave caught his wrist and stopped him.

“Not yet,” he said. And his face was still so close to Klaus’ most private area that Klaus could feel the huff of air against his wet skin when Dave spoke.

Klaus shivered and groaned, but brought his elbow back down to the bed, resigning himself to the sweet torture.

Dave reapplied his tongue to Klaus’ hole and soon Klaus was panting and sighing and pushing back against him, needy whines and breathy little gasps escaping his throat.

Dave switched up the movement of his tongue from strong licks and fast little flicks, and instead covered Klaus’ hole with his lips and then sucked lightly.

Klaus groaned under him, pushing back, his legs trembling. “Oh, fuuuuuck!” he whimpered.

Dave gave the furled hole another slow lick, then pointed his tongue and – ever so slowly – pushed it against Klaus’ entrance. Klaus’ breath hitched. At first Klaus’ muscles resisted. But then, as Dave wiggled his tongue slightly, he felt the tight ring of muscles begin to relax, allowing him to push his tongue in slightly. Dave pressed his tongue forwards in tight circular motions, then slowly pulled back and pressed in again, fucking Klaus’ hole with the tip of his tongue.

“Oh, fuuuuucck me!” Klaus wailed. “Fuck, Dave! Yes! Oh, fuck I need to cum!”

Dave could feel Klaus trembling under his hands, the erratic twitch of his hips, the desperate, broken edge to his voice.

“Please, Dave,” Klaus pleaded. “Please, please…”

And Dave, his face still buried in Klaus’ ass, finally reached around and gripped Klaus’ leaking erection and started pumping.

And Klaus keened. He was caught between thrusting his painfully hard cock forward into Dave’s fist and pressing back into the delicious wet flicks of Dave’s tongue against his quivering hole. He was so desperately, painfully hard; the desire to cum so strong. And the feeling of Dave finally touching his rock-hard cock was toe-curlingly amazing. And Dave’s tongue, pressing and licking and sucking him – there – was beyond amazing. And for Klaus, time seemed to be caught in one delicious, shining moment of wet, hot, hard, fast, urgent, pleasure, clenching, tensing… and then he was cumming. Hard.

Thick creamy ropes spurted onto the bed and over Dave’s fist and Dave could feel Klaus’ hole twitching and clenching under his tongue as his muscles spasmed in waves. And Klaus was moaning Dave’s name wildly… then breathlessly… then a little brokenly as his trembling legs gave way and he finally collapsed forwards onto the bed.

Dave moved up the bed and lay down on his side next to him. Carefully, he ran his fingers through Klaus’ hair, studying his face, his closed eyes, his blissed-out expression.

Klaus opened his eyes blearily and looked at Dave.

“Dave,” he whispered hoarsely. Dave smiled.

“Dave,” Klaus tried again, “That was just so… thank you. Just, wow! Like really. Wow. It was just… so…” he screwed up his face, trying to find the right words and failing, ending instead on just a low grunt of consonants. “Nngggh,” he finished.

Dave smiled, eyes fond and affectionate. “Well, if I’ve rendered you speechless, I guess it must have been okay,” he teased lightly. Klaus blinked. Dave brought his lips down and tenderly kissed Klaus’ forehead and whispered, “I’m glad you thought so. It felt pretty incredible to do it for you too.” Klaus hummed and his eyes drifted closed.

“Hey,” Dave squeezed his shoulder. “You should have a quick shower before you sleep.”

“Don’t wanna,” Klaus mumbled. “Tired and comfy and no energy.”

“Come on, up you get.” Dave encouraged. “You’re sticky and sweaty and smell like sex. You’re laying in the wet spot and you’ve got cum in your hair. Shower, now.”

Klaus groaned and with great effort pulled himself up and moved towards the bathroom.

“Aren’t you coming?” Klaus asked in a small voice.

“You get in, I’ll be there in a sec,” Dave said. Klaus nodded and padded off.

Dave quickly stripped the bed and put on clean sheets from the cupboard where Grace kept the fresh linen. He bundled the dirty ones up and stuffed then in the laundry basket. He then went into the bathroom to join Klaus.

When they were showered and dry, Klaus in a pair of fluorescent briefs and Dave wearing clean boxers and a soft old tee from the stash of clothes he’d started leaving at the Academy, they crawled into bed. Klaus cuddled up to him and rested his head on Dave’s chest.

“Good call,” Klaus admitted, running his hands over the crisp sheets.

Dave hummed in response. Klaus closed his eyes, listening to the rumble of it against his ear.

“So, power kink, huh?” Klaus smiled into Dave’s chest.

“I guess so,” Dave replied. “Believe me, it took me by surprise a bit too.”

“It was good,” Klaus said. “Different. It looked good on you.” Klaus paused, then added, “I like the idea that we can switch stuff up like that sometimes.”

“Me too,” Dave found himself agreeing.

“You know,” Klaus said tentatively, “we could go further too.”

Dave traced the rim of Klaus’ ear with a fingertip.

“Yeah,” Dave said, feeling bold in the gathering darkness of the room. “Give and take, assertive and submissive, top and bottom… there’s so much we can try together. And that’s just power stuff. Then there’s… well, everything else as well.” He felt Klaus hum his agreement into the skin over his heart.

“You know,” Klaus said after a pause, “when we talked about this the other day, I thought we were going to start with some light fingering. But I guess I shouldn’t have underestimated you, Mr Katz. You just dived straight in tongue first.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Dave asked a little worriedly.

“Fuck no!” Klaus exclaimed. “I just didn’t think we’d start with rimming. I mean it’s not really the natural place to start.”

“Isn’t it?” Dave frowned. “To me, it kind of just felt right in the moment.”

“I’m glad you did,” Klaus insisted, “it was mind-blowing.”

Dave grimaced. “Promise you’re not teasing my technique?” He asked. “It’s the first thing I’ve done to you before you’ve done it to me first. I didn’t have any previous experience to work from.”

There was silence and Dave frowned and shifted to look down at Klaus’ face. He was surprised to find Klaus’ cheeks pink and his ears a little red.

“Klaus?” he asked, worried.

“You weren’t bad.” Klaus said quickly. “It’s not that. It’s just that, for once, I don’t really have anything to compare to either.” His eyes widened. “Not that I usually compare you with other people,” he said quickly. “I don’t do that. Just, with this, I don’t have a point of reference. So, all I can say is you blew my mind.”

Dave took a moment to process and then asked the obvious question. “Are you saying none of the people you’ve been with before have done that for you?”

“Um… yeah,” Klaus blushed – actually blushed – “yeah, I guess I am.”

Dave swallowed. “Because they didn’t want to? Or because you didn’t want them to?” He swallowed again. “Did I… I hope I didn’t… Klaus, did you want me to do that just now?”

Klaus shifted to press his face into the hollow of Dave’s neck, his nose nuzzling the base of his throat. “Dave,” he said seriously, “I wanted it. I wanted you to.” He paused. “Before now… nobody ever offered. It wasn’t particularly something that was on my radar. I was just happy for them to fuck me. Just that was okay. I didn’t feel like I was missing out or anything. But then you just… did that for me. Because you wanted to. I’ve never been with anyone who put me first like that before.”

Dave’s heart clenched and his chest felt tight. He wrapped his arms around Klaus’ small frame and buried his nose into the curls on the top of his head.

“Klaus” he murmured, “Klaus…”

“It’s okay,” he heard Klaus sigh into his neck, “you don’t need to say anything.”

Dave swallowed the lump in his throat and tightened his arms around Klaus. The warm weight of words that didn’t need to be said just yet, lying like a blanket over them as they held each other in the gathering darkness.

Finally, Dave broke the silence, “I don’t know whether I should be a little bit offended, you know? About not being complicated, I mean.” He grinned.

“What?” Klaus frowned, opening his eyes.

“That thing you said to Diego earlier, about his dynamic with Lila being complicated.”

“Oh,” Klaus settled back down. “That.” He paused then added. “You might play the deep, strong, silent type sometimes, Dave, but you’re not complicated. I mean, not complicated complicated.” Dave ran his fingers soothingly up and down Klaus’ arm. “It’s not like do you confusing things that I can’t work out. You’re easy.”

Dave laughed.

“I don’t mean easy.” Klaus corrected himself. “I mean…”

“I know what you mean,” Dave cut in. He pressed a kiss to the top of Klaus’ head. “You might be a chaotic, eccentric oddball at times, but to me, you’re easy, too.” Klaus huffed a small laugh against Dave’s chest.

“I love that we always seem to be on the same page about stuff,” Klaus said into the quiet stillness of the room.

“Yeah,” Dave agreed. “We click. Always have. And I suppose we trust each other too, so that helps.”

Klaus blinked and swallowed hard.

“We do click, don’t we?” His voice was small.

“Yes,” Dave said earnestly.

“This really is something special, isn’t it?” Klaus said, just as quietly. He wants confirmation, Dave thought. Despite all the bravado, he’s actually a little vulnerable and insecure and wants confirmation.

“Yes,” Dave said, giving him exactly what he needed. “For me, right from the very first moment, this just felt right.”

“For me too,” Klaus admitted softly.

Klaus rolled over and settled on his side, pulling Dave flush behind him; the big spoon to Klaus’ little spoon. Dave’s knees tucked into the crook of Klaus’ legs, his arm coming over, fingers interlacing and hands curled close to Klaus’ chest. Dave’s groin pressed against Klaus’ backside, but in this moment, Dave felt nothing more than tenderness and affection. He pressed a kiss to the back of Klaus’ neck, the spot right between his shoulders, and shifted slightly, snuggling them even closer.

“After everything,” Klaus mumbled into the pillow, voice drowsy and muffled slightly. “After all this time, and everything we’ve been through to get here.” He paused, let out a breath and then carried on. “It’s hard to believe that this is how it could be from now on.”

Dave thought back to how he used to feel about his relationship with Klaus – like his life had turned into a series of moments as precious… and delicate… and fragile as champagne flutes on a tray in the wind. He wondered when he had stopped feeling like the tiniest wrong move or misstep could bring his happiness crashing down in a shower of irreparable shards of shattered crystal.

“Believe it,” Dave replied, and Klaus sighed and relaxed further into his arms. Dave shut his eyes and held him close, his heart beating a rhythm against Klaus’ back: this, just this, just this, just this, just this…

#klave #klaus hargreeves #dave katz #the umbrella academy #klaus x dave #klaus/dave

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popculturebuffet · 3 years

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The Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck: The Master of the Mississippi! or “How Much Satisfaction Can There Be?”

Hello everybody. I’m back to the life of scrooge mcduck.. it’s been an eternity hasn’t it and that’s for a simple reason: I had other reviews to do, especially comissions, I kept pushing this back further and further as while I love this series i put my paid work ahead of any other projects, until Kev, i.e. the guy paying for most comissions out and out asked that this be done before I got to the rest of The Ride of the Three Caballeros. It’s also why I finally put a loose schedule in place, to keep projects from slipping so the MANY retrosectives and what not I have going can move along at a steady pace and I can slot in comissions easier, 5 bucks an issue or episode if your curious. So now things are a bit tider, i’ll try to have an installment of scrooge’s storied past up a week from now on, so keep an eye out for that, minus christmas week as I have something else planned Duck Comics wise. So with all that out of the way and any exposition able to be baked into the plot proper, we can FINALLY get back to the life and times of scrooge mcduck

PREVIOUSLY ON THE LIFE AND TIMES OF SCROOGE MCDUCK:

A Young Scrooge got his inspiration, his start and also scared the crap out of some asshole scooby do style. Also his sister Hortense was adorable. SO there’s that. But eventually with some inspriation from what he didn’t realize was a ghost, Scrooge decided to head to america to find his Uncle Pothole. So that’s where we left off, with Scrooge heading to

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Since then as the scrapbook page explains, Scrooge has worked his way up the Missippi to Louieville, Kentucky... which is where Rosa lives, and it is not a concidence it’s set here as a result. But much like how the Marvel staff being in new york in the 60′s lead to that universe having it’s unique and vibrant New York setting that’s lasted to this day, sometimes a creator using where they live as the basis can lead to really great and intresting stuff and here he had a valid reason as Louieville was one of the main hubs on the Mississippi river and thus a massive boomtown.

Not the kind of boom town I meant but I can never say no to boomtown. But yeah it’s not only a bustling hub usually anyway, but things are extra amped up given it’s Derby time. I mean the Kentucky Derby’s no steel ball run but what could be? So naturally the crowds are booming and scroogie is impressed. I mean he’s a 13 year old boy from a poor community in Scotland. This is huge to him. But he has no time to dawdle and asks the closest random gentleman where he could find his Uncle Angus, who was mentioned last time and is the one needed for this. The guy is genuinely helpful and points him to his uncle... but as I only noticed on this read through also uses a knife to swipe his bag by cutting the handle off. It’s part of why I admire this series so much: rosa snuck so many small background gags into the margins you can always find something new reading it or always get something fresh out of it. We also meet Gyro’s grandpa Ratchet.

I mean there’s no might about it. David Byrne is rich and he’s the delightful weirdo we all deserve and the autistic icon I needed.

I have no context for this, I just figured searching David Byrne in Tumblr’s Gif Search would find something delightfully batshit in that way only hec an do and I was right.

So as the tweenager enters the gambling establishment, we find Uncle Pothole, whose playing poker with local asshole and tophat enthusiast Porker Hogg...whose name keeps tripping me up as I write this as he’s not the only pig named porker I know of but is far less memorable than this one

He and Pothole are playing cards, and while Porker can go on for days he can’t go on for eight weeks.. or even two days really and prepares to finish it. He puts up his boat the Dilly Dollar, which Angus takes offence to since Porker sank his. Angus offers up the location of the Dreenan White, a legendary, and real legend at that, riverboat that sank. Since Angus was a Cabin Boy on the boat, he knows where it is. So the final hand is dealt and Angus wins with five aces, mostly because Porker’s ace ejector jammed. When Scrooge questions if this is dishonest, Angus explains their under riverboat captain rules which basically means you can cheat your ass off and it’s not only expected it’s an insult NOT to. So Angus takes Scrooge with him, seeing the boy as a good luck charm and finding out to his shock Scrooge is his nephew, but gladly takes his newly found relation under his wing as he relates to his coming to america to find his fortune, having done the same.

Angus is the first of Scrooge’s many mentors and easily the best part of this chapter. He’s lively, intresting but a contrast to scrooge, someone whose not AFRAID to work but wouldn’t mind an easy victory or giving up the adventure game, as he ends up doing. He’s a lively, clever guy and very charming. I”ll get back to the mentor part of it in a bit, but needless to say in a chapter that i’ll admit, and get more into the why as we go, is not one of life and time’s better chapters, he’s a highlight. So the two get to the Dilly Dollar while Hogg decides to follow to find where the Dreeynan Whyte is. As for why he hasn’t drudged it up Angus simply can’t as the Mighty Missisippi’ s too muddy for that, making another mark twain quoted joke about it. But Scrooge mentions the clarity pills from Ratchet, meaning he has a way to do so, and Angus is now elated and decides to head there to get his fortune, specifically near Monkey’s Elbow kentucky, which while relocated slightly to fit the story, is a very real town and an objectively great name for a town, much like Forty Fort, which is also a very real town name. Hogg overhears and after being literally booted out of the boat, as we’ll see literal asskicking is a McDuck family staple, goes to recruit some hired goons.

Yes hired goons, as every good villian needs some hired goons. And these specific goons.. are a bit.. familiar. And you’ll find out who they are under the cut!

Yup it’s the Secret Origin of the Beagle Boys. And if your wondering “Wait are they immortal too?” well. their not these are their grandpas. Also Hogg’s whole complaint about “wearing them if there yellow” just.. bugs me. They .. they aren’t cowards.. Grandpappy’s just being smart and knows his sons are excessively dumb, as is family tradition. They have no issue with committing crimes, they just don’t want to be arrested by the first Navy boat that finds them. That’s just.. common logic. This is one of Life and Time’s weaker atrributes: Due to being built around barks stories, that means most of his foes here are the random greedy asshats of the week Scrooge faced who had some loophole to his fortune or the grandparents of said assholes. With the exception of hte Beagles, who show up a few times, Glomgold and Soapy Slick who wihle a minor vilian is at the center of one of the best chapters of the story, most of these guys are just forgettable hooligans. Not terrible, and the stories around them are good enough to make it enjoyable but nothing really distinct from what Scrooge normally faced outside of his origin story. Really Barks was simply stronger at STORIES than he was at creating villians: As Magica, The Beagle Boys, Gladstone, Rockerduck and Glomgold all show he wasn’t untalented at it, it’s just more often than not he fell back on some random asshole.

Instead of using a dedicated Rogue’s Gallery of intresting baddies, most writers of most comics just used villians of the week and maybe ONE OR TWO designated hitters. Batman’s Rogue’s gallery wasn’t big enough to form their own country at this point is what i’m saying, it just meant Rosa had to build more vilians of teh week. It dosen’t drag the story down entirely, as the story is about SCROOGE and his growth: sometimes the villians are just a secondary ingrident in a good story. But it’s still something very noticable and one of the weaker parts of the story, it’s just like I said, with the story being more on Scrooge and where a lot of his personality came from, it’s something I really didn’t notice before and really dosen’t bother me now I have. The villians are weak btu the hero is so intresting and grows so much it just dosen’t matter. Their there to provide Scrooge with opportunites to evolve, and the really good ones are saved for the best moments of that and for when a villian IS needed to change scooge as a person. So it all evens out.

So naturally the next day when the McDucks head to get the pills, Hogg’s beat them to it, and when Ratchet refused to cut cards for his stock had them beat Ratchet while they were at it. Though oddly Angus assumes he’s just passed out while Scrooge is the one to recognize someone knocked him out. You’d think a well experienced guy like Angus would know that eh whatever. Point is Hogg is ahead and Angus dosen’t have a crew... though Scrooge and Ratchet naturally volunteer since both have skin in the game: Scrooge wanted a job with Pothole anyway and Ratchet is out a job and out his pills. Angus gladly takes them on.. but accidently sets the Dominos in place for one of Comics!Scrooge’s worst behaviors down the line.

Yeahhh.... Pothole is partially responsible for Scrooge criminally underpaying his staff and family. That gag.. is easily one of , if not my least faviorite part about Rosa’s work. It’s a holdover from Carl Barks work naturally, and one that makes some sense: Rosa set his work shortly after barks, so some time in the 1950s, having barks works take place around when they were written. There isn’t a strict timeline of what happened which year outside of life and times, but Rosa’s works are delieberate period pieces. That’s not a bad thing and if he’s going to base most of his stuff around stuff Barks did, then it’s a good call to make. The issue is the execution: While with Barks it was in part because there was less income inequality, it was also clearly a bit of satire, as Donald was the every man and companies could be unfair, cheap douchebags then as they are now. IT feels more like a joke on Scrooge. Donald still puts up with a lot of stuff, but he’s more liable to complain. In the Rosa stories.. it feels more like he just makes Donald the butt monkey and it dosen’t play well as.. Donald dosen’t want to be there. He has every RIGHT not to want to be there as he’s not being paid a decent wage, not being compensated in any other ways, and could be searching for a boss who actually pays him a living wage. Donald is more the victim in Rosa’s stories but he simply doesn’t realize this, or the fact it’s even worse since Donald is you know RAISING THREE CHILDREN AND SCROOGE KNOWS THIS BUT DOES NOT PITCH IN ONE EXTRA CENT. So already without even adding the decades on, it hasn’t aged well.. but add in the modern day business where it’s a STRUGGLE to get states to raise minimum wages, the job market was hit horribly even BEFORE Corona came and made things worse, and companies horribly abuse their employees to ludcirous extremes such as time crunch in the video game industry, black friday in retail and of course the house of nightmares that is the amazon warehouse, and I say that being a frequent use of amazon.. just because I rely on a company dosen’t mean I have to LIKE doing so in any way shape or form.

What i’m saying is Scrooge’s actions were already bad, making this joke fall flat, but it comes off as downright unfunny after all of that. Even given the times Scrooge was raised in it’s just not a funny gag that “oh ha ha a 70+ year old man ever learned right from wrong when it came to paying his family or workers”. It just paints scrooge in the worst light possible as man who never grew, in at least one aspect, from being a goddamn tweenager and is easily one of the weaker moments of an otherwise epic and well crafted saga, and as i’ve said of Rosa’s exemplary work as a whole.

Anyways the race is on and with the DIlly Dollar gaining on Hogg’s Cotton reiver witch, Hogg has them ram into the boat and flip it over. And no i’m not descrbing a sex act. In a show of competence while Blackheart Beagle’s actions send them close to the falls too he just uses the dilly dollar as a ramp. We also get a really cool flipped over panel as our heroes are waterlogged. A snag boat shows up, I assume it removes snags and dangerous objects and complains about rescuing them. .even though CLEARLY they had some kind of accident. It’s.. never a good look to complain about having to save someone’s life or livelyhood unless that someone is Tucker Carlson. Then it’s ABSOLUTLEY okay to grumble a bit about having to do the right thing.

So after a quick gag we’re introduced to a chekovs gun as a massive tree sprouts out of the river and spooks Scroogey.. and Angus who explains it’s a “sawyer”, something that happens when a dead tree falls in a river.. sinks in.. and then can rise right back up suddenly, violently and boat destroyingly.

So our heroes head on and find the location and Angus dumbly assumes that Hogg, who had a clear start is just lost.. and not you know lurking in the bushes watiting to strike. And strike he does as he once again rams hard and long into the Dilly Dollar, leaving it on a sandy shore. Schwing. Our heroes are landlocked but Hogg, just to earn himself a dare to be stupid award, gives the Beagles their deed, and tells them theirs diving equipment. You can take a wild guess what happenes next.

Angus understandably laughs at his misfortune because it’s funny.. and Hogg responds by dropping him down a well. Before Scrooge can raise a benefit concert to send his love down a well, Angus asks Scrooge to join him instead.. and soon we find out why as the Beagles only find a wrecked town. Turns out thats where Monkey’s Elbow WAS, and they build the new town near it.. with the farm Angus ended up at being where the wreck is now.

Our heroes explore the wreck which honestly, looks really damn impressive, a muddy destroyed riverboat hauntingly beautifully lit by candle light, which Scrooge is holding naturally. I may of had my criticisms for Rosa this chapter, and I will again, but it’s moments like this that reinforce that the man is still one of the best comic book artists i’ve ever seen and knows how to beautifully meld his art with storytelling.

Speaking of which our heroes find the safe with the money. Angus is ritch but Scrooge.. dosen’t get how he can be happy. Scroogie questions “How much satisfaction can there be in having your life’s fortune handed to you? “ It’s easily the best moment of the chapter.. while it’s only two panels before we get to Angus moving things right along... it really speaks to Scrooge’s character. Even as still a naive boy from Glasgow... his whole life has been hard work, effort working your way up. To just.. LUCK into fortune like this baffles him. To be satisfied with that and not seem to have any amibation to use it to go further, to make more of yourself. To be more. While he hasn’t quite got his love for adventure yet, we’ll get there next time, even now there’s a hunger inside him, a desire to not just get rich, that’s all fine and good.. btu to have EARNED IT. To truly feel like he made his way.

And it perfeclty makes sense with his background: Scrooge was raised with nothing, and found out at the start of the story his family had lost everything, a once glorious clan reduced to a poor starving family on the edge of Glasgow. To him it can’t just be about getting Money.. he wants to bring his clan back. To make his family happy and proud. To make sure his father’s faith as the last of their line wasn’t misplaced. He has a lot of expectation on him and that’s bred his character. Angus.. just sorta left at a young age and has been incommuincado. He dosen’t really care about family or legacy.. not that I don’t think he would’ve sent some money back to buy the castle, I just think he was never that concerned with his family’s legacy like Scrooge despite coming from a similar cloth. He wanted the money, but Scrooge cares about the money.. and his family. It’s what anchors him. What keeps him from his worst impulses and keeps him grounded.. for now anyways but that’s a ways off. Point is it really speaks to Scrooge’s character.

But soon the beagles find our heroes, and a fight breaks out.. and naturally even without years of experince yet, Scrooge is still a McDuck and while previously his fighting was based on ingunity.. this time the little runt’s just out for blood and suprises the beagles with a clump of mud and then beating the shit out of them. When one of them tries to respond by wacking him with a piece of wood... he instead breaks a collumn and with the dreenan unable to handle the mud without it... the place starts to collapse. However our heroes don’t make it out unschathed as the Beagles capture them and the gold... for some reason. Seriously Scrooge dosen’t fight back or anything nor does angus they just.. let hte beagles overpower them. WHen Scrooge fully fought the grown ass men just a few mintues ago. What the actual hell.

But we do get another Badass Scrooge Moment, as once hteir on the ship, Scrooge mentions another treasure.. which baffles Angus despite you know.. the boy clearly playing at something. Yeah whlie I do like Angus.. he can be grating in parts and here he just comes off REALLY stupid. But after being tortured by running on a boat, with the beagles mistaking Angus’ genuine confusion for being a bastard man, which naturally their impressed by, Scrooge fessses up.. and you can see exactly’s coming.. the sawyer raises the boat into the air and harpoons it. The beagles try to play off the port authority but scrooge unmaks those “infamous beagle boys”.. and thus names one of his greatest threats. Blackheart vows revenge while our heroes go for a sasparillia..though Scrooge keeps the money.. as he says the memory of that adventure is worth more than anything. As for the Gold, the goverment took it back, but did give them a reward, and Angus only dosen’t give Scrooge a share because he’d have to refloat it, but offers him a job and the dollar in two years at a bargin price. Alls well that ends well. A truly poetic way to end the chapter and prepare scrogoe for the next... TO BE CONTINUED...

FINAL TH...

Yeah.. as you probably know this is NOT the end of the chapter. Instead we go on for a bit more. And a few more pages would’ve been fine, to help bridge the gap.. we see scrooge get the Dollar at a bargin price as his uncle promised, though the deal turns out to be a bit of a lemon as the riverboat industry has dried up. But then.. we get a couple page adventure with the beagle boys, where the beagles try to steal the goverment gold scrooge is transporting, Ratchet helps him escape, and we DO get the utterly badass image of scrooge driving the boat onto land and it exploding and causing a massive flood> While that is awesome.. the pacing just takes a huge hit and it’s easily why this chapter is one of my least faviorite. It probably would’ve been better if they just had a passage of time montage of events at the start of the next chapter and ended on that bit before.. but instead it just goes on a bit and really tries my patience every time as instead of moving on to a bold new adventure.. we just get some filler to help pad things out so Rosa can get it to the right page length. I don’t blame him, sometimes shit happens, but it dosen’t make it any more fun to read. So the Dollar is scrapped and Scrooge is back at the bottom with barely a cent to his name. But he’s resolute: since the river boating days were winding down anyway he’s going west to become a cowboy, and heads off on the Wabash Cannonball as a fireman, i.e. the guy who stokes the engines, to make his way there. So we end our story for now and again.. this would’ve been much better condensed but whatever. We’re finally done.

Final Thougts

As you could probably tell but I saved for here, and I outright even said this is one of my least faviorite chapters and one of the weakest if not the weakest. Part of it is the structure issue I mentioned, but the other part is it just.. isn’t as intresting at least to me personally. The rest of life and times have pretty unique stories that while not removed from genres Scrooge stories have covered, use the story of his rise to make them really pop as we slowly see how the iconic Scrooge we know became the legend and what shaped him that way. Here while we get bits of that, it’s mostly just a standard uncle scrooge story but with him as a kid. It’s not a BAD one, it dosen’t drag the whole of life and times down and it’s servicable but it just feels a bit more standard for Rosa’s work. Still enjoyable, but nothing really spectacular like the next two chapters. On it’s own or as one of the side stories it would’ve been fine but as part of this huge sprawling masterpiece, it’s just a bit underwhelming and just makes me eager to get to the next part every time rather than really suck me in as much as the others. Again the pacing dosen’t help with that and only makes it drag further. It just dosen’t have the weight the other ones do character wise and as such just makes me want to get to part 3 already, which naturally that story within a story dosen’t help with. Overall while not a bad comic, I don’t think any part of life and times is truly bad, it’s still not a GREAT comic like what’s to come or what came just before.

NEXT TIME ON LIFE AND TIMES: Scrooge heads out to the wild wild west.. though instead of a giant mechanical spider he fights some cattle rustlers and meets Teddy Roosevelt HELL. YES.

Until then, happy holidays and later days!

#the life and times of scrooge mcduck #scrooge mcduck #life and times #ratchet gearloose #angus mcduck #the beagle boys #the master of the missippi #don rosa #duck comics

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unicyclehippo · 5 years

Note

If you continued that modern bodyguard au into something I would be eternally grateful🙌🏼 If so wish I mean

‘do i have to do this?’

‘do you have to promote your new CD by going to a three minute interview? yes, contractually.’ joel nudges her foot with his. ‘it’ll be fine.’

ellie hums quietly, clutches at her guitar case.

‘what are you worried about?’

the question comes from dina hayes, bodyguard of a week and three days. there hasn’t been too much of an opportunity to use her so she’s come along today more as a learning opportunity than anything. she is to shadow joel and accompany ellie in the studio where joel might not be able to, when he’s off doing managerial work, or if the make-up team bans him from the room again. the question comes as a surprise—not because dina hayes hasn’t been conversational or pleasant to be around, but because ellie’s previous bodyguards hadn’t been and she’s still adjusting to the change.

‘i’m not great with talking,’ ellie tells her, and returns her attention to the window and the slow crawl of the city outside of it.

‘why not?’

ellie shrugs. ‘i’m not here to talk about me, i just want people to hear the music.’

‘because the music is important.’

ellie nods.

‘what if you’re important to someone out there? you’re gay, right?’ the question draws a sharp glance from joel, but ellie just nods again. ‘what if hearing you talk about yourself is really important for a kid who is confused or worried, or just really happy to see that you’ve,’ out of the corner of her eye, ellie can see dina hayes waves a hand in a way that includes ellie and the car and the driver and the guitar and the everything that comes with being a semi-famous artist. ‘made it.’

ellie doesn’t look away from the window. they pass a bank of taxis, orange and black, and the sounds of the city are loud even in the car. the beeping of the walk signal, the chatter of a thousand commuters walking into the skyscrapers that shoot up on all sides. ellie pretends she’s back home among the silverbark gums and that these are just massive, massive tree trunks, but the game doesn’t work so well today. because of the nerves, she thinks.

‘thanks for the suggestion,’ joel says finally into what registers to ellie now as an uncomfortable silence.

ellie blinks, looks over at the other woman who is staring out the opposite window. ‘it was a good point,’ she agrees, and when dina hayes looks over, it is with an expression ellie knows well. confusion, mostly, and a whole slew of complicated stuff ellie can’t divine. ‘thank you.’

dina hayes nods. it’s a little disappointing, because ellie likes to hear her voice, but it’s fine.

there’s a small crowd gathered outside the studio that has to be shuffled away so the car can dip down into the private car park. tires squeal on painted concrete as they follow the parking attendant to their place.

stepping out of the car, even a floor down and many tonnes of concrete between them, ellie can hear the faint screams.

‘ell! ell! ell!’

ellie hoists her guitar case into her arms, flicks her fingers over the catches so they click and stick and click and stick and click and-

‘i hope they have signs,’ joel says mildly, following the attendant to the elevator. ‘i like the meme ones.’

ellie grins.‘you’re too meme literate for an old man. it’s weird.’

‘i’m not old.’

‘ancient.’

‘this grey is all thanks to you, y’know,’ he grumbles. he watches surreptitiously as dina hayes sweeps the parking lot and the elevator and leads them in before taking her protective stance next to ellie. he gives ellie a short nod; he likes her, but ellie already knew that.

‘middle-aged.’

‘distinguished,’ dina hayes chimes in, and joel’s brows shoot up and he breaks into a grin.

‘ha! distinguished, yeah! i like that.’

the studio lights are hot and too-bright in her eyes and the couch is way too soft. ellie scoots to the edge of it and gets a glare from one of the studio hands but no one wants to interrupt the anchors introduction of her to correct her position so she pretends that’s the same as permission and stays where she is.

‘—so please welcome to our studio with me, eleanor knight, or as the world knows you now—ELL.’

the sharp-edged sound of clapping pulls her attention from the side of the set where joel is standing, arms crossed, frowning. he’s a solid stable source of what is real and important in those fake-ass room and ellie pulls in a deep breathe, focusing on him. seeming to sense it, joel’s black eyes slide from the anchor over to her and he gives her a short nod.

‘hello, christine gunnarsen.’ ellie says.

‘good morning! and just chris is fine,’ the woman says with a wide smile of perfect white teeth.

ellie wonders if she’d had braces, and how long for, and whether they’d hurt, and how it is that teeth whitening actually works because there’s no way her teeth are white like that just from toothpaste.

‘ok,’ ellie agrees. nods.

if there is one good thing about news hosts, it’s that they’re usually very good at smoothing over awkwardness. christine “just chris” gunnarsen is a perfect example of this. she sits on the couch opposite ellie and turns so that if ellie managed to ignore the massive cameras and the lights and the dozens of people walking outside of the set, it would feel like just the two of them talking.

‘so, ellie—can i call you ellie?’

‘yes.’

‘ellie, you’re here today because as of yesterday morning, you have released your second album—hopeland. now, this is following your debut album a little over a year ago, the last of us, which was received very well by critics and by the public as well. you had two number one hits from the album—winter, and quarantine zone. that’s a lot of success early on, how are you feeling about this new album?’

ellie drums her fingers on the body of her guitar, cocks her head to the side. ‘joel, my dad manager, says i should tell you that i feel very positive because it’s good music and my fans will enjoy it.’ joel, still exactly where he was, shakes his head, grinning.

chris is smiling too. ‘and what about you?’

‘i had a little more fun with these pieces,’ ellie tells her, and she feels her cheeks turn a little hot and shyness shivers up her back. she tucks a strand of hair back behind her ear and shifts the guitar closer. ‘i tried out some new techniques and so the sound is a bit different in places. maybe the fans will still like it, maybe it’ll draw a new crowd. i’m—excited to find out.’

‘a little nervous too?’ chris asks, and crinkles her nose like this is a joke just between the two of them. ellie knows it isn’t, but she doesn’t mind. she knows the woman is being kind.

‘yeah. very. music is, it’s really important to me. it’s, it’s probably the foremost way i communicate with people. i’m autistic so music is, it’s always been a way of talking to people and understanding them and helping them understand me and i think the first album did that well and this one will show a little more.’

chris looks surprised by the comparative flood of information but rolls with it, nodding. ‘like what? what can we expect from it? this is the CD,’ she says, and picks up the slim box from the table. ‘but it’s available on spotify and iTunes and anywhere else to listen to music, is that right?’

ellie nods. ‘i think my favourite one—i mean, it’s hard to pick,’ she says, and laughs quietly. ‘i wrote all of them, with a little help from some of my friends—‘

‘your co-writer on the CD is listed as howie garzia?’

‘yeah, howie is brilliant,’ ellie agrees and smiles genuinely, properly genuinely, for the first time since she was sat on this couch. she can’t help but pluck out a quick line on the guitar as she says, ‘they’re probably the most musically intelligent person i know. howie has years of classical training in, like, voice and a billion instruments and i was really lucky that they were partnered with me. we had a really great time making this album together and i got to meet my best friend.’

‘i’ve heard so many similar stories of either artists making great friends with other artists or great enemies. what is it about the process of making an album, or this album, that brings people together like that?’

‘it’s a lot of work,’ ellie says with a shrug. ‘more than people might thing. more than i thought when - when i started a few years ago. but when you’re, you’re - when you’re putting your thoughts and feelings and heart down on paper and playing it for someone else to hear it can be a really vulnerable experience, especially that first time or first hundred times, so it’s gonna be with the right person. howie listened and made it better and pushed me to challenge myself to, to not bring it back in? to keep it out there where people can hear it all. they make my music better and me braver so,’ ellie shrugs, cheeks fully warm now, and she ducks her head as her fingers nervously play over the guitar.

‘well, that sounds like a beautiful segue into asking you to please play something for us off your album. we have a stage over there,’

‘what a coincidence,’ ellie says, unthinkingly, teasingly, and is rewarded with a bright laugh from the host and a few others scattered in the crowd. she lets herself be led to the stage and sets about making sure the microphone is at the right height, though this is all stuff they did before ellie went onto the show. she clears her throat, searches the room for joel—there, square and solid—and, without really knowing why, she searches for dina too and finds the other woman staring back at her—bright eyed and proud.

‘i think i stated to say before but i got sidetracked,’ ellie says with a grin, more confident behind her guitar, the microphone, the persona of ELL. ‘this is one of my favourite songs i wrote. it’s called fun and games, and it’s a love song, i guess, to first loves.’

#prompt fill #ellie x dina #video games #bodyguard au

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thewritenerd · 4 years

Text

This Life and the Other

(I’ll be posting what I write for nanowrimo here every day (minus any big spoilers)

‘And you’re really suggesting we go there?’ I asked Lalita. She shrugged. ‘It wouldn’t be my first choice I’ll admit. But as it seems to be our only choice.’ ‘We’ll have to take the chance.’ Ronnie finished. Aiden looked uncertain but he still nodded. ‘I hate to say you’re right but you’re right,’ he sighed. ‘We’ll have to be very careful. Maybe case the joint first.’ ‘Isn’t that what criminals do?’ Cam asked. ‘Technically we’re planning on breaking and entering so.’ Iesha said grinning at them. Aiden came over to the sofas and sat down next to Ronnie. ‘Who would be best for keeping watch?’ he asked. We all looked around at each other. ‘Well Lalita would be good,’ Ronnie suggested. ‘She could alter people’s memories if they start to notice whoever we send.’ ‘He could you mean.’ Lalita corrected him.

‘Oh Sorry Lala.’ ‘Any way back to our planning I think we should send Saren.’ Iesha said pointing to me. ‘His mind reading could really come in handy.’ ‘I have been practicing.’ I admitted. ‘On my friends in the sanctuary.’ I added seeing Cam’s horrified expression. Aiden nodded. ‘That’s good. And I suppose we’d better send one more person.’ He looked round before his eyes settled on Cam. ‘We should send Cam. They probably have the best memory of all of us, plus they can run back here with updates using their speed.’ Ronnie raised an eyebrow. ‘Cam, Lalita and Saren working together. Now that I’d like to see.’ I exchanged glances with Cam. In the past few weeks are relationship had been stagnant. It wasn’t that we hated each other. Or at least I didn’t hate them. But they didn’t exactly trust me and that little detail tended to get on my nerves. Still if it’s for the greater good I supposed working with them wouldn’t be too bad. Plus if Lalita would be there to keep them in check. ‘So it’s decided then,’ Aiden announced. ‘For the next week Cam, Lalita and Saren will keep an eye on the entrance to the Pound.’ ‘And do you know where the Pound is?’ I asked. ‘Yes it’s not far from here,’ Lalita said. ‘Probably why this hideout was empty.’ ‘Well that’s convenient.’ I grumbled. He smiled at me. ‘I suppose it is,’ he admitted. ‘We’ll no point complaining about convenience.’ Iesha said. ‘The sooner you start the better so you better start today.’ Aiden nodded. ‘Iesha’s right you to should head over there right now.’

***

We hid behind a low wall across the street from the entrance to the Pound. The Pound itself was a large building that looked like a mix between a factory and a prison. The prison part I could understand, it was a place for keeping people locked up after all, but the factory part confused me. I pointed this out to Lalita and Cam. ‘It does seem an odd design choice,’ Lalita admitted. ‘But never mind that, we’re here to keep an eye on the place not critique their architecture choices.’ ‘You say that like we can’t do both.’ Cam joked. When Cam jokes they don’t really smile or use a jokey tone. It’s more somewhere between snarky and matter of fact, and they frown a little less. I swear that kids going to have permanent frown lines by the time he’s 18 at this rate. Shifting a little to get more comfortable I began to wonder how much longer it would take to see someone or something that made this all worthwhile. The spot we had chosen kept us well hidden and we had a good view, but it wasn’t comfortable. It had rained at some point last night, or maybe it was early this morning, and the ground was still damp. There was also the matter of how to sit so you could see over the wall and still be able to duck behind it if necessary. Although we were the smallest three of our little group, a factor that had been pure coincidence, we still had trouble hiding. The best option seemed to be kneeling but that tended to hurt after a while. Sitting was another option but we either had to sit facing the wall, which made ducking quickly difficult. Or we could sit with our backs to the wall, which made ducking easier as we could just lean forward but in order to see the Pound we had to twist our upper torso which was painful. We all found ourselves shifting position on a regular basis which could get distracting. Occasionally I’d give a quick sweep of people’s minds to make sure no one was getting suspicious. Not that there were many people around and most of them had more important things to worry about than three teenagers hiding behind a wall and staring at a building. ‘Saren are you seeing this?’ Lalita asked interrupting my latest mind sweep. I looked where he was pointing and saw a large black vehicle with the words Mutant Control Unit printed on the side in yellow. The vehicle looked like a truck but had small square windows along the side. It stopped outside the gates and one of the security guards walked over to the driver’s side. The driver leaned out and said something to the guard who nodded and walked round to the back of the truck. Pulling himself up using handles on the side of the truck he stood on a metal strip that stuck out from the back of the truck and peered through the windows in the back; before hopping back off and walking back to the driver’s side. He said a few more words to the driver before turning to face a small booth where another guard sat waiting and giving him a nod. The man in the booth did something I couldn’t quite make out and the gates swung open allowing the truck to drive through. ‘They must have caught some more mutants,’ Lalita whispered his voice shaking. ‘Well there’s nothing we can do about that now.’ Cam replied in what I guessed was an attempt to reassure him. They turned back to look at the gate a thoughtful expression on their face. ‘But at least we’ve learnt one thing, those gates are so slow I could probably run in there before they open and back out before they close.’ ‘They’ll spot you if you just run in and out.’ I pointed out. ‘No they won’t I run faster than the human eye can see.’ ‘The camera will still see you you glogger brain.’ ‘Who are you calling a globber brain?’ ‘No one, I called you a glogger brain.’ ‘What the fuck even is that.’ ‘It’s a type of animal from my home planet. It sort of looks like one of your slugs but less slimy. It’s the size of a cat and has greyish pink skin. And they’re not very bright. Hence why I called you a glogger brain.’ ‘Can you two stop?’ Lalita sighed standing up. ‘Hey where are you going?’ Cam asked. ‘I’m going to get something to eat. We’ve been here long enough it’s probably lunch time and I need to stretch my legs. Please don’t murder each other while I’m gone.’ With that she started walking off leaving the two of us alone. ‘Wouldn’t it be quicker if you’d gone?’ I asked Cam. ‘It would. But there’s always a chance I’d get something he can’t eat.’ I wasn’t sure what they meant by that. ‘Does he have allergies or…’ Cam shook their head. ‘No nothing like that. It’s more of a sensory thing caused by them being autistic.’ ‘Yeah I heard him mention that. It has something to do with his brain right?’ ‘Yes. But you’re better of asking him the questions not me. He understands it more after all.’ I guess that made sense. Everything had returned to it’s previous slow and boring ways as we continued to keep watch. ‘Maybe we should play a game,’ I joked. ‘Like what?’ Cam asked shifting into a new position. ‘I don’t know? What’s that game where people try to guess what you’re looking at? I see was it?’ ‘I spy? There’s no way I’m playing that with a psychic, you could cheat.’ ‘I wouldn’t.’ ‘Or so you say.’ I rolled my eyes. ‘Gee paranoid much. Why don’t you trust me? Especially over something so small.’ ‘Because I’m paranoid.’ I stared at them waiting for an explanation. They sighed and tilted their head so their chin pointed towards me. ‘I’m paranoid. As in I have paranoia. And mood swings and I see things that aren’t even there. And don’t ask me what’s wrong with me ‘cause all I’ve got is a list of symptoms and no diagnosis.’ I looked at them thinking. What they said explained quite a bit. Their struggle to trust me, the fact they could be fine one moment and snapping at everyone the next, and it explained why their eyes kept looking over your shoulder or to the side as if they’d seen something move. ‘So you don’t trust me enough to play I spy with you but you’re happy to share that bit of personal information?’ ‘My brain has invented its own logic.’ They shrugged. I was about to make a comment when I spotted Lalita heading towards us. ‘Finally I’m starving.’ I said as he sat down and started passing out the food he had brought back. As we ate not much happened across the road. Occasionally a truck would drive in or out, other times it would be a normal looking car. Probably Hunters going to and from work I thought. Thinking about hunters having a life outside of work. They had homes and family’s. What did their husbands and wives say when they came home? “Welcome home honey did you have a good day throwing kids into vans and taking them to a prison factory where they’ll be locked up?” ‘Oh Sorry Lala.’ ‘Any way back to our planning I think we should send Saren.’ Iesha said pointing to me. ‘His mind reading could really come in handy.’ ‘I have been practicing.’ I admitted. ‘On my friends in the sanctuary.’ I added seeing Cam’s horrified expression. Aiden nodded. ‘That’s good. And I suppose we’d better send one more person.’ He looked round before his eyes settled on Cam. ‘We should send Cam. They probably have the best memory of all of us, plus they can run back here with updates using their speed.’ Ronnie raised an eyebrow. ‘Cam, Lalita and Saren working together. Now that I’d like to see.’ I exchanged glances with Cam. In the past few weeks are relationship had been stagnant. It wasn’t that we hated each other. Or at least I didn’t hate them. But they didn’t exactly trust me and that little detail tended to get on my nerves. Still if it’s for the greater good I supposed working with them wouldn’t be too bad. Plus if Lalita would be there to keep them in check. ‘So it’s decided then,’ Aiden announced. ‘For the next week Cam, Lalita and Saren will keep an eye on the entrance to the Pound.’ ‘And do you know where the Pound is?’ I asked. ‘Yes it’s not far from here,’ Lalita said. ‘Probably why this hideout was empty.’ ‘Well that’s convenient.’ I grumbled. He smiled at me. ‘I suppose it is,’ he admitted. ‘We’ll no point complaining about convenience.’ Iesha said. ‘The sooner you start the better so you better start today.’ Aiden nodded. ‘Iesha’s right you to should head over there right now.’

***

We hid behind a low wall across the street from the entrance to the Pound. The Pound itself was a large building that looked like a mix between a factory and a prison. The prison part I could understand, it was a place for keeping people locked up after all, but the factory part confused me. I pointed this out to Lalita and Cam. ‘It does seem an odd design choice,’ Lalita admitted. ‘But never mind that, we’re here to keep an eye on the place not critique their architecture choices.’ ‘You say that like we can’t do both.’ Cam joked. When Cam jokes they don’t really smile or use a jokey tone. It’s more somewhere between snarky and matter of fact, and they frown a little less. I swear that kids going to have permanent frown lines by the time he’s 18 at this rate. Shifting a little to get more comfortable I began to wonder how much longer it would take to see someone or something that made this all worthwhile. The spot we had chosen kept us well hidden and we had a good view, but it wasn’t comfortable. It had rained at some point last night, or maybe it was early this morning, and the ground was still damp. There was also the matter of how to sit so you could see over the wall and still be able to duck behind it if necessary. Although we were the smallest three of our little group, a factor that had been pure coincidence, we still had trouble hiding. The best option seemed to be kneeling but that tended to hurt after a while. Sitting was another option but we either had to sit facing the wall, which made ducking quickly difficult. Or we could sit with our backs to the wall, which made ducking easier as we could just lean forward but in order to see the Pound we had to twist our upper torso which was painful. We all found ourselves shifting position on a regular basis which could get distracting. Occasionally I’d give a quick sweep of people’s minds to make sure no one was getting suspicious. Not that there were many people around and most of them had more important things to worry about than three teenagers hiding behind a wall and staring at a building. ‘Saren are you seeing this?’ Lalita asked interrupting my latest mind sweep. I looked where he was pointing and saw a large black vehicle with the words Mutant Control Unit printed on the side in yellow. The vehicle looked like a truck but had small square windows along the side. It stopped outside the gates and one of the security guards walked over to the driver’s side. The driver leaned out and said something to the guard who nodded and walked round to the back of the truck. Pulling himself up using handles on the side of the truck he stood on a metal strip that stuck out from the back of the truck and peered through the windows in the back; before hopping back off and walking back to the driver’s side. He said a few more words to the driver before turning to face a small booth where another guard sat waiting and giving him a nod. The man in the booth did something I couldn’t quite make out and the gates swung open allowing the truck to drive through. ‘They must have caught some more mutants,’ Lalita whispered his voice shaking. ‘Well there’s nothing we can do about that now.’ Cam replied in what I guessed was an attempt to reassure him. They turned back to look at the gate a thoughtful expression on their face. ‘But at least we’ve learnt one thing, those gates are so slow I could probably run in there before they open and back out before they close.’ ‘They’ll spot you if you just run in and out.’ I pointed out. ‘No they won’t I run faster than the human eye can see.’ ‘The camera will still see you you glogger brain.’ ‘Who are you calling a globber brain?’ ‘No one, I called you a glogger brain.’ ‘What the fuck even is that.’ ‘It’s a type of animal from my home planet. It sort of looks like one of your slugs but less slimy. It’s the size of a cat and has greyish pink skin. And they’re not very bright. Hence why I called you a glogger brain.’ ‘Can you two stop?’ Lalita sighed standing up. ‘Hey where are you going?’ Cam asked. ‘I’m going to get something to eat. We’ve been here long enough it’s probably lunch time and I need to stretch my legs. Please don’t murder each other while I’m gone.’ With that she started walking off leaving the two of us alone. ‘Wouldn’t it be quicker if you’d gone?’ I asked Cam. ‘It would. But there’s always a chance I’d get something he can’t eat.’ I wasn’t sure what they meant by that. ‘Does he have allergies or…’ Cam shook their head. ‘No nothing like that. It’s more of a sensory thing caused by them being autistic.’ ‘Yeah I heard him mention that. It has something to do with his brain right?’ ‘Yes. But you’re better of asking him the questions not me. He understands it more after all.’ I guess that made sense. Everything had returned to it’s previous slow and boring ways as we continued to keep watch. ‘Maybe we should play a game,’ I joked. ‘Like what?’ Cam asked shifting into a new position. ‘I don’t know? What’s that game where people try to guess what you’re looking at? I see was it?’ ‘I spy? There’s no way I’m playing that with a psychic, you could cheat.’ ‘I wouldn’t.’ ‘Or so you say.’ I rolled my eyes. ‘Gee paranoid much. Why don’t you trust me? Especially over something so small.’ ‘Because I’m paranoid.’ I stared at them waiting for an explanation. They sighed and tilted their head so their chin pointed towards me. ‘I’m paranoid. As in I have paranoia. And mood swings and I see things that aren’t even there. And don’t ask me what’s wrong with me ‘cause all I’ve got is a list of symptoms and no diagnosis.’ I looked at them thinking. What they said explained quite a bit. Their struggle to trust me, the fact they could be fine one moment and snapping at everyone the next, and it explained why their eyes kept looking over your shoulder or to the side as if they’d seen something move. ‘So you don’t trust me enough to play I spy with you but you’re happy to share that bit of personal information?’ ‘My brain has invented its own logic.’ They shrugged. I was about to make a comment when I spotted Lalita heading towards us. ‘Finally I’m starving.’ I said as he sat down and started passing out the food he had brought back. As we ate not much happened across the road. Occasionally a truck would drive in or out, other times it would be a normal looking car. Probably Hunters going to and from work I thought. Thinking about hunters having a life outside of work. They had homes and families. What did their husbands and wives say when they came home? “Welcome home honey did you have a good day throwing kids into vans and taking them to a prison factory where they’ll be locked up?”

#nanowrimo #writting #this life and the other #first draft #long post #read more

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inside-aut-blog · 5 years

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Autistic Caleb Widogast

Part One

Caleb Widogast of D&D web series Critical Role is widely recognized by the fan community as autistic-coded. There are many, many, many reasons why, and with the episodes numbering well into the dozens it would take several paragraphs to expound on on all of them.

So here’s the first in a series of posts doing precisely that.

EPISODE ONE:

There isn’t much here in episode one, but there is this:

Caleb uses stereotypically autistic speech patterns in the very first conversation he has in the show. Nott draws it to a close with “All right, well, that’s on the to-do list,” and Caleb immediately mirrors her phrasing with “All right, well, let’s get something to eat then.”

Later, down in the bar, Beau asks Nott if she is cold. Caleb misinterprets this to mean “Why are you wrapped up?” and subsequently explains, very defensively, that Nott is a goblin and obviously goblins are not well-liked in these parts and that is why she is wrapped up and Beau should drop it—which is, uh, pretty much the definition of blunt oversharing, no?

Caleb also, for the first time, shares his magic cat with someone else as an expression of kindness and a kind of second-hand socializing. Beau notes immediately that it’s “kind of therapeutic”; right away, Frumpkin is coded as an emotional support animal. (It helps that he takes Frumpkin absolutely everywhere, often choosing to carry him on his shoulders when he can just as easily pop him in and out of the general vicinity with a snap of his fingers.)

Still later, Jester rearranges one of the shops they visit, and Caleb grows nervous the moment he notices it (“A bit of nerves begin to brew up”). On the one hand, this is probably because he’s afraid of getting in trouble with the shopowner, but on the other: getting anxious at the sight of slight changes in your surroundings is pretty quintessentially autistic.

EPISODE TWO:

Caleb offers to give Nott his cat as a distraction from her urges to steal. Once again, Frumpkin is coded as an emotional support animal. And, on top of this, Caleb seems to hold the idea that—well, he helps me, so obviously he’ll help you too!

Nott reassures Caleb that they can leave the group at the drop of a hat if they need to. “They’ll never know who we were,” she says. “...Caleb and Nott,” he says, responding both literally and with a touch of confusion.

Caleb calls a man’s novel “trashy” and seems to realize a second too late that it was rude; he tacks on a very hasty “No judgement.”

Caleb compliment’s Beau’s muscles very awkwardly.

Caleb goes on to say, “We have been in the woods for too long. I’ve forgotten how to talk to people.” And sure, spending time away from society can make people a little weird. But needing practice to maintain basic social skills like complimenting people? Sounds autistic.

Caleb says, later, “I don’t know what you just said, but I am interested in books. Particularly in the arcane realm, but any kind of book.” That ticks two boxes at once: auditory processing troubles and special interests.

At one point, Beau references Frankenstein and Caleb doesn’t understand what she’s saying. It’s possible, out-of-universe, that this was a meta reference to Frankenstein not existing in the story’s universe, but consider—in-universe, Beau must have referenced the story world’s equivalent of Frankenstein, and Caleb did not get that reference. Therefore: Caleb is not only having difficulty following her metaphor, but he’s missed a pop culture reference.

EPISODE THREE:

caleb is nonverbal after he “gets over [his reaction to casting firebolt]”; he “doesn’t say anything, but starts pushing bodies onto the back of the cart”

stays nonverbal for A While; “during all the busywork, i’m not saying anything, but i keep giving worried and stressed glances at my little friend”

in the middle of planning, with zero transition or context, caleb goes, “also i have a cat” and doesn’t offer context til jester goes ?? yes he’s cute?

gets excited & dances in the street w/nott on his shoulders (stim!!)

nott, when caleb ignores jester in favor of reading: he gets like this when he’s studying. he gets very focused, it’s best not to disturb him

“i prefer him as a cat, to be honest, but in a pinch–” change Bad, cat Good

when jester braids caleb’s hair, liam says “it feels nice”; Sensory Good

“i’m a good talker when i have to be”; qualifies the statement, implying it’s an occasional mask he dons when Necessary

E4:

nott: no one’s going to be around to save you if you get into trouble caleb: i’m almost dead already nott: yeah, that’s not good jester: that’s not comforting, caleb

at the very end of caleb’s conversation w/the guard, liam says caleb looks him in the eye, which implies he was Avoiding eye contact before that

caleb, in court, bluntly: i’m a dirty hobo and i reek like yesterday’s garbage

caleb, abruptly: well, you know, this is very fascinating, but i have some errands to run. nott, would you like to run errands with me? we are totally coming back and not leaving on our own undercover

caleb calls the old shopkeep “grandfather”; he does this with other elderly folks in later episodes too [the woman in the melora statue; madam musk], even when he knows their names. seems like maybe an internal rule that he has to refer to old folks this way bc it’s Respectful?

caleb, overexplaining: this is called a bath nott: i’ve heard of them caleb, still overexplaining: a hot bath

E5:

caleb: before i go away, am i looking for anything specific? beau: just people coming caleb, echoing: people coming…

caleb ducks back behind a corner mid-fight & says “nein nein nein"; repetitive speech

caleb later ducks back behind the same corner & says “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”; Big Autistic Mood

coin-counting!!

E6:

[abruptly] “well, my social anxiety is getting the best of me. i’m taking a walk. goodbye” + brisk exit

“sorry, my curiosity gets the best of me, always”; blurts out questions

caleb realizes belatedly that his question abt alfield giving them extra coin was callous, goes “it’s asking a bit much, i was too forward”; low empathy

“i’’m sorry, it’s very noisy in the shop. what did you say?”; APD

the whole conversation in the shop caleb is just–super blunt. “i’ve been on the road a long time and i’m carrying a smell with me, if you cannot tell" “to the point, i like it” “i don’t mean cheap shit” “well, it’s a barn, ja?”

caleb, on being reminded that people are dying: maybe i can put [turning frumpkin back into a cat] on hold, although i really hate to (emotional support animal + Different Is Bad + low empathy)

“we can do both, but there is a timestamp on the people. we should take care of the people first, because then we’re increasing how much gold we will bring in, because if they die then we will not get as much money for them if they are alive”; low empathy + extreme practicality

E7:

“yes, handle this [grievously injured] child, but then we’re very curious to ask a couple–i’ll shut up”; [sing-song voice] low empathy……

caleb: you know, it’s funny, because only about 30 minutes ago i also had a bird, but he was obliterated beau: oh, that’s right caleb: it was very sad. i’ll bring him back tomorrow shakaste: thanks for that caleb, oblivious: he and i, we are [crosses fingers] like that

E8:

jester: well, she’s mostly known for her hmm-hmm-hmm. outside of that, her voice is amazing, you should hear her sing caleb: what does that mean? jester: what does what mean? caleb: hmm-hmm-hmm

E9:

feel like it’s worth noting this is the episode where beau tells caleb “maybe you would know what we’re up to if you went along with the group for once!” & from there on out p much invariably caleb makes it a point to step back & go along wherever the group wants. so–internal rule!

“i’ve got to stop complimenting you, it does not lead to good moments” + immediately walks away

beau, shouting: he said enTHUSIASM! caleb, jumping & cringing: ohH jeez!!

caleb sees that yasha is uncomfortable w/jester hugging her & does an Understanding Nod; yasha says, “i’m very uncomfortable with human touch” & caleb goes “i feel like i know you better now”; reads as Same Hat

gets angry at jester. swipes mud down his face in a wordless fuck-you. doesn’t rly align w/any specific autistic traits but listen. listen. does that seem like the kind of thing a neurotypical would do? i don’t think so.

E10:

molly pins caleb to the wall & caleb does not make eye contact or speak

caleb gets stuck for a bit repeating variations of “who kicks a cat?!?!”

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bkwrm523 · 6 years

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So, this was supposed to be submitted to @imaginemycroftholmes , but my desktop is being obnoxious about it. Posting it and tagging them, with permission.

Name: Sara

Age (note that if you are under the age of consent your score will be significantly lower for Marriage, Friendship and Partnership): 30

Gender: Female

Occupation: Administrative Assistant (fancy way of saying secretary)

Nationality: USA

Country of origin: USA

Personality type (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator): INFP

Education: Bachelor’s degree

Marital Status (if not applicable put N/A): Not married

Number of children (if not applicable put N/A): 0

Who would you shoot out of John, Sherlock, Mycroft and why: Mycroft. The Holmes brothers are more likely to understand if I’ve been forced into it. Sherlock tends to be a bit more emotional and unpredictable than Mycroft. Also, Sherlock’s been shot a few times, that we know of, and Mycroft hasn’t (that we know of), so I think it’s Mycroft’s turn (it said “shoot”, not kill. I have terrible aim and I’ve never used a gun; Mycroft is probably safe)

Height: 5’2 (of sass and insecurity)

Position in the family (oldest, youngest, middle): youngest, only non-firstborn in my immediate family

Best subject: Literature

Favorite Subject: Literature or History

Worst subject: Math

Last song listened to: Rag doll by Aerosmith

Favorite color: Purple

Thoughts on Molly and Sherlock’s impending relationship: If they’re finally hooking up, then I’m super happy for them!

Illness/allergies/impairments: I suspect I’m autistic, and I have anxiety and depression. They’re both usually under control.

Last sentence uttered to another living human being: Where’s the turkey?

Hair color/length: short (about chin length when I remember to get it trimmed often enough). Natural color is a very nice dark brown, but I usually dye it red. I’ve considered dying it purple, but it hasn’t been possible so far due to my job. Maybe in the future.

Who do you feel more sympathy for Sgt. Donovan or Anderson’s wife: Anderson’s wife. I’m not exactly the most informed in the situation, but Sgt. Donovan hasn’t seemed to show any remorse when she’s wronged someone, has a bizarre vendetta for Sherlock, and probably knew Anderson was married when she got involved with him (okay, I’m guessing on a lot of these). The only thing I know about Anderson’s wife, is that her husband cheated on her. Possibly my opinion would change if I knew more.

Eye color: Blue

Constantly cold, hot or prefect: Usually hot. (meaning I prefer colder temperatures, to clarify)

Seven Noteworthy skills (ex: can play an instrument, fire most guns, ride a unicycle, etc.): I’m a pretty good liar (probably not by the standards of Sherlock or Mycroft, but I can fool the average person). I’m a decent gamer (PC). I don’t speed-read, but I’m a pretty fast reader. I’m not good at coming up with positive things about myself. I’m a very good reader - I read Hamlet by myself when I was 12 just to prove that I could. Read a couple other advanced books at a young age to prove that I was good at it. I’m a writer - I don’t have much inborn talent, but I’ve worked really hard at it for as long as I remember, so I’ve learned to be very good at it. I’ve been dealing with mental issues (as listed above) by myself from a pretty young age, so I’m used to coming up with my own coping mechanisms.

Nine noticeable sins: (ex: moody, bad listener, selfish, etc.): I’m impatient. Shy I tend to be a bit selfish, but it’s a flaw I’ve been working on for years and am pretty good at stepping on those impulses these days. I’m not good at detecting subtleties in conversation; you often have to be blunt with me or I may not understand. I’m a second generation geek I’m not good at communicating it when I’m in emotional distress and need help I’m not good at keeping in touch with friends

Languages known/spoken: English, I can swear a little in Orcish

Cats, dogs, both or other: I don’t have any pets, but I’m a dog person and I’m allergic to cats.

How often you help your community (1 never, 2 sometimes when prompted, 3 average, 4 often, 5 weekly): 2

Favorite Holmes family member: … this feels like a trick question, so I’m gonna cheat and say Sherlock & Mycroft’s dad.

Body type (1 obese, 2 overweight, 3 averages, 4 fit, 5 skinny): 2

Number of past lovers (put N/A if virgin or not seeking marriage): N/A

Level of cleanliness (5 slobs, 4 messy, 3 average, 2 pretty clean and 1 spotless): 4

Would you rather piss off Sherlock or Mycroft: This is a really tough one, but I’m gonna say Mycroft. They’re both reasonable people, but I feel like Mycroft is less emotional, and therefore would be easier to reason with so I could make amends.

Rate your mental health on a scale of 1-5 with one being terrible and 5 being fine: 2.5

Rate your confidence on a scale of 1-5 with 1 being poor and 5 being Sherlock levels: 2

Combat level (1 sitting duck, 2 somewhat okay, 3 can hold their own, 4 pretty damn good, 5 a proficient fighter): 3

Circle of friends: Very very small. About five or so people I chat with on a daily basis.

Who do you side with more Sherlock or Mycroft: … I dunno. I don’t like to get in the middle; infp’s tend to loathe conflict and I’m no exception. I will say I think the Holmes clan has been epically unfair to Mycroft lately.

Level of intelligence on a scale of 1-5: I’d say a three, but I think people who know me would say I’m being modest and give me a 4. I’ll let you decide which to believe.

Who do you side with more Mycroft or Mrs. Hudson: Mrs. Hudson.

Introvert or Extrovert: Introvert.

Political alignment: In the USA’s system, I’m an independent that leans towards democrat. I’d rather decide each issue individually than tie myself to any one party. The UK’s system, I’m not sufficiently familiar with to say.

Who would your rather be trapped in a long car ride with Mummy Holmes or Holmes Senior: Mummy Holmes, I guess; she’d probably be easier to have a conversation with. I don’t think I’d mind with either of them, however.

Go to outfit for everyday: Jeans and a tshirt on my days off (tshirts I buy plain solid ones, then I buy fabric paint and stencils and put geeky stuff on them). I have work attire that’s usually black formal pants, black modest undershirt, and a button down formal shirt in some sorta color.

Go to outfit to impress: I refer you to the formal outfit above.

5 hobbies (not to be confused with noteworthy skills): Gaming (PC), creative writing, reading (fiction), sewing, watching movies

Opinion of Rosie Watson and Mary Watson: Rosie seems like a perfectly sweet and normal baby. I’m so sorry she lost her mom, though. Mary, I’m glad she was happy with John at the end, and I’m so sorry it didn’t last.

Favorite music/book/movies: Music, I really don’t feel that strongly about. I listen to heavy metal, but I wouldn’t say I have a favorite song. Books and movies it’s the opposite problem; I love too many to pick just one. However, I have a go-to answer to both questions for the purpose of conversation. Favorite book - The Hobbit. Favorite movie - Havey (to clarify, the one starring Jimmy Stewart)

How well you take rejection on a scale from 1-5: with five being the best? I’m gonna go with 4.5. Not a five because I’m not that overconfident. Yeah it may hurt, but we’ve all been there before (either being rejected or doing the rejecting, whatever), and I’m an adult. Last time I got rejected, I just said “okay”, walked away, and we remained friends for years after. It never came up again.

Religious or religious affliations: Agnostic. I try to be a live-and-let-live type, as long as the other person doesn’t harass me to try & convert me.

Kids or no (note this is wanting them not the ability to have them): I don’t have any at the moment for financial reasons, but I do want them one day.

Out of the Holmes family (Siger, Violet, Sherlock and Eurus) who would you kill, maim, kiss or roommate with and why:

Kill: Eurus. I know I’m being self centered here, and I am sorry for that, but she comes off to me as a whiney baby that couldn’t take platonic rejection and decided to punish everyone for it. Grow up. Maim: Violet, I guess. I don’t really have super strong negative feelings about anyone else, but she seems to have an attitude that Mycroft is less important than Eurus, and that irritates me. Kiss: Sherlock. I can tell him it’s for a bet and kiss him on the cheek. Also, I definitely don’t want to be his roommate; I like sleep. Roommate: Siger. Don’t know that much about him, but he seems nice.

Do you think what Mycroft did with Eurus (at the time) was justified and needed: YES. And his parents’ response to finding out about it all was, IMHO, immature and extremely rude. It’s understandable that their emotions were high in the situation, but there was absolutely no excuse for taking it out on Mycroft.

Please bold the following that you wish to have with Mr. Holmes: Friendship Partnership Marriage Mentorship

A detective who was mere days away from cracking an international oil smuggling ring has suddenly gone missing. While inspecting his last-known location, officers find a note: 710 57735 34 5508 51 7718. Currently there are 3 suspects:Bill, John, and Todd. Can you break this answer and tell me the reason. I’m gonna have to admit defeat on this one. I could google it, but I’d rather not cheat. I have no idea, sorry.

What belongs to you but others use it more than you do? Your name. Heard this one before :)

Dwayne Johnson was running away with the loot from a heist in his car along with Vin Diesel. One tire was punctured and he dropped down to replace it. While changing the wheel, he dropped the four nuts that were holding the wheel and they fell into a drain. Vin Diesel gave him an idea using which they were able to drive till the rendezvous point. Take his loot and get into Vin Diesel’s car. There’s no reason I can think of why they can’t share a car. Unless you can space out the remaining nuts on the tire to hold the tire onto the car; probably wouldn’t be good enough for very long, but should be good enough to get them to the rendezvous point, or far enough to ditch the car somewhere safe. Whichever.

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theragingthespian · 7 years

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part seven of my never ending attempt to bring krypto on the show

anonymous said: For Krypto! Headcannons, does Clark ever get his act together and visit with Kara/Krypto/Lena?

i am going to pretend i have thought of this before

it’s a few months later into it, a few months of getting the routine down, a few months of waking up to krypto’s nose poking into her cheek and teeth nibbling at her clothes when clark comes down for a visit

and oh, kara knows there’s issues-issues, it’s easier to call it that, something little, something manageable than what she actually thinks which is more along the lines of why did you leave me, why did you leave him- but she still gets excited at the thought of him visiting

alex and lena share a look. they do not tell her what this look means.

trust her, she asks. they remain silent on the issue

when he finally slips through the window, it’s not quite how she imagined it

it’s not big hugs, embraces that take her off her feet as krypto pops happily around them

it’s, oh, it’s awkward

krypto huddles around her legs in a display of wariness and oddly enough, protectiveness

if kara decides then and there that he gets extras tonight, well hypothetically if it happens, lena doesn’t say anything about it

it takes some coaxing- a trip to the park, actually- but krypto comes around

clark throws the ball for him and she swears, she swears krypto is intentionally being hard to get along with when he won’t let go of the ball whenever clark goes to reach for it

krypto’s chasing after a poor squirrel- kara hopes it’s alright, her and krypto have had this talk five times about what’s okay to eat and what’s not- when clark says you two fit well together

a part of kara thinks maybe he and krypto would’ve too, if given the chance. the more selfish? is it selfish? part of her is glad it turned out this way, thinks yes, they do

he reminds you of krypton?

kara hates how he talks about krypton sometimes

at first, he steered clear of any talk of it. she was too young, too i don’t have a purpose at first to push much of anything

it wasn’t until she was older, until they hadn’t seen each other but a few times each year when he started speaking of it. always assumptions, always relayed to him through what he learned in the fortress

it was correct of course, but it wasn’t krypton. it wasn’t buildings so high that she remembers her muscles pulling from having to crane back her neck so far. it wasn’t colors that words fall short of describing. it wasn’t music so soft, and oh, were the melodies haunting or do they just haunt her?

but she thinks of the few glimpses she got of krypto on krypton, hustled away as jor-el tried test after test until suddenly, krypto wasn’t there. and then, neither was she

no, she says. because krypto is everything she’s done right. krypto is warm mornings shared with lena as they huddle close and ignore obligations for just five minutes more, please. is alex and maggie curled close on the floor, making faces at krypto to get him to bark as he bounces back and forth between them. krypto is a partner high in the sky, sweeping through clouds. they couldn’t have done that on krypton. no, she repeats

anonymous said: Some Krypto headcannons involving him being hurt or losing his powers?

how bout just losing powers because i am soft and cry easily

everyone does their share of work to keep him from the fighting, but that, that does not stop him when he hears kara’s shout over the comms right before it fizzles out

everyone is scrambling and in the commotion, krypto disappears

he shows up not ten seconds later on the feed

what follows is a small, small dog with enough determination to rival the girl of steel and a hell of a lot of heat vision

he handles it just long enough for kara to get her bearings. just long enough that krypto- not knowing limits, not knowing when it’s too close, when it’s enough- blows out his powers

neither of them realize it until krypto tries to jump into the air alongside kara and doesn’t get anywhere, falling back into the sand

you know that confused look dogs do, one ear up the other sorta falling to the side. he’s confused

kara’s heart stops for a moment, because she thinks krypto’s hurt, krypto’s hurt when she was right there

but then he pops back up, tries again, and oh

kara picks him up, smiling as he wriggles around in her grip

sorry buddy, you’re grounded for the time being

but listen, yall think krypto regularly gets spoiled by every breathing being? try powerless krypto who sure as hell milks it

limitless treats are spread. kara was worried when he had powers. now, krypto realizes that there actually is a limit to his stomach through trial and error

everyone?? is bringing him food. not just treats, but like here, i baked this for the hero

and blankets. omfg. there’s so many blankets.

j’onn drops a pile of them underneath his desk which is implicitly krypto’s Spot

it doesn’t take long for krypto to regain his powers. he can sit all day in the sun on lena’s balcony

it’s nice having his powers again, but he does miss the treats

as if he doesn’t get enough

@rbcchoi said: Going along the lines of autistic!Kara, Krypto also doubles as a service dog for whenever she gets overwhelmed (@nell411 seconded this)

krypto is kara’s shadow

other than when she’s fighting crime and saving the day- even though there are some exceptions to that- krypto and kara are inseparable

which means that krypto’s there when things get too much

it always starts off small. she overlooks it every time until she thinks about it after

the sun a little too bright in her eyes. her alarm jarring

but lena is there, hand smoothing down her arm as she kisses her with a soft good morning

and kara forgets about it

but then it’s snapper yelling at her. guardian- james having a close call. it’s people getting a bruise when she should’ve been faster

it’s- it’s too loud and when? when did she end up curled on the couch

she doesn’t know. all she knows is that the couch is scratchy and grating against her skin. there’s a constant tick in her ears that she knows, she knows it isn’t from her apartment. maybe down the hall? on another level? it’s her skin feeling itchy, like she doesn’t fit inside her body and maybe it took all this time for her body to reject earth, it’s gravity, it’s air, because something- something isn’t right. it’s sirens and crying and laughter and music and tires screeching and-

it’s too much

she doesn’t know how long she sits there, trying to separate what’s what when she notices a warmth at her side

she tries to focus on it, furry and long pressed up close beside her

there’s something cold against her hand, against her palm and pushing her fingers to uncurl, fists to unclench

it’s a nose. it’s krypto’s nose

kara cracks open her eyes slowly-when had she shut them?- to two blue eyes before krypto ducks his head under her chin, ears flattening

it’s the longest she’s ever seen him be still. she presses her face against his fur, most of it slipping easily through her fingers- lena’s no doubt been using conditioner on him again- and listens to his heartbeat. breathes in that scent that only comes from lingering in the clouds, soft like the sky first breaking and sharp like ozone

lena finds them like that, hand already grabbing the door to ease it shut and slipping off her heels so they don’t clack against the floor

she kneels beside the couch, offering her hand in case kara wants it

kara’s hand slips immediately into hers. she makes sure to keep her voice soft, tries not to add to the commotion kara constantly hears, do you want to go to bed or stay here

lena goes to reach for a blanket when kara murmurs bed to wrap her up in. kara always says it feels like she can’t stay grounded, like she’s not here and the pressure sometimes makes it better, if only a little

and, oh, there krypto is tugging a blanket behind him before dropping it in her hands

that night kara is sandwiched between the two of them

her hand stretched forward and resting on krypto, feeling his chest rise and contract. heart thumping steadily on through as lena’s soft breaths hit the back of her neck, fingers at her waist sometimes flexing involuntarily

krypto’s always there. especially whenever kara needs him

@agent-alex-danvers said: who feeds krypto food off their plate and who lets him on the couch and the bed against the rules?

my dude no one listens to the rules

why do they even have them??

it’s the first night she’s been over since kara took krypto in and- oh, her couch is shredded

you probably shouldn’t let him on there

right

or the bed

got it

kara mistakenly cuts off a little piece of pizza crust for him and holds out her plate

he takes it alright. takes the majority of the pizza, leaving kara to stare at the tiny piece of crust

they establish rules then and there

it’s so pointless though, god, it’s so pointless

no couch or bed. kara really can’t afford to replace fabric every time krypto gets playful and wants to wrestle and hop around

no feeding him food off their plates. they don’t want to create a monster

he just took it. just like that

i know darling

didn’t even hesitate

the next time lena walks in, the two are most certainly cuddled up on the couch

how do you tell krypto no? it’s easy, you don’t

lena doesn’t say anything. neither does kara. nor krypto. they just all snuggle close under the blankets until lena is smoked out, because hot damn, it’s hot

but really, lena thinks she is Above it. he is a dog, it’s fine. tell him no, establish your authority

it doesn’t matter that she always, always gives him little bits of leftovers. she wasn’t going to eat it anyway, there’s no need to be wasteful

she’s in complete control

except one night kara doesn’t answer her phone, and lena ends up waiting with krypto

it gets later and later. alex had sent a text that kara just needed some time under the sun lamps, but she was fine, she was fine

that doesn’t change the fact that lena needs to see that. needs to feel kara’s smile under her fingertips, needs to hear that laugh against her ear

but it’s late, and her eyes are falling and kara’s said it was fine

so lena crawls into bed

it’s a minute later when there’s the soft click of nails against the floor and- krypto jumps on the bed beside her

she watches him spin in circles twice, almost laying down before he does it again and wonders if kara normally allows this or if it’s just because she’s there instead of kara

but then he, oh, he whines when he nudges kara’s pillow and settles against her, and really?

lena is weak and krypto is fluffy and warm and soft and she always wanted a dog

kara takes a picture of them when she comes in a few hours later, wrapped around each other

it’s many more nights after that. of dancing in the kitchen with krypto trailing after them. of running in the park as krypto chases her, breath straining as she tries to run until krypto catches her without even looking winded. of date after date when lena wakes up early one morning

kara’s breathing is long and slow, her palm warm and heavy against lena’s stomach. krypto is back up against her, fur brushing her nose until lena shakes her head away

lena thinks out all the rules she’s broken- you can do this, should do this, better do this, be the best, act this way, don’t do that, that’s not how a luthor acts- this one is the best

#supercorp #kryptoverse #lena luthor #kara danvers #supergirl

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bestfriendforhire · 7 years

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Entry 281

I felt a touch guilty in the morning when so many people headed groggily to the airport. We had been up fairly late, playing Ancient Tribes of Earth together. Our visiting guildmates loved seeing the setup we used after the ballroom had been cleared of the wedding supplies. I hoped the lack of sleep didn’t cause them issues as they headed home.

Jarod and the twins departed as well, already leaving for Japan. I was certain Ai and Mai would take advantage of his sleep-deprived state in some way, but he wouldn’t mind. He married them after all. Well, I didn’t really know if this counted for marrying both yet or not. Only one went through the ceremony as a bride so far, but with minds linked as theirs were, they both would have experienced it. The idea still seemed a bit odd to me. I didn’t really think I’d like experiencing multiple bodies, but that was all they knew.

“James, are you ready?” asked Alma as she stepped into my office.

“Ready?” I asked.

“We need to start planning our wedding.” she stated.

“Here you are, Alpy!” exclaimed Aaliyah as she ducked around her and handed her paperwork.

“What are these?” asked Alma, already looking through them. “Oh.”

“Yep. All the paperwork you need to sign as well as a few for your father. Everything’s booked and ready to go.” stated Aaliyah.

“Wait. What? You picked a date for us?” I asked, feeling a bit startled. I did want to marry Alma, but was I really ready to be a husband? I hadn’t been ready to become a fiancée just yesterday. I could feel Alma’s magic boiling within her hidden away from most as her temper was hidden behind the impassive expression she bore.

“Aren’t you getting a little presumptuous?” demanded Alma, her temper coming through in her tone.

“Want to fight about it?” offered Aaliyah, cracking her neck and knuckles simultaneously as she turned to Alma.

For a moment, I thought Alma might try, but good sense apparently won out. Fighting Death would always be a terrible plan.

After a long pause where Alma stared down Aaliyah, she said, “Did you even bother considering how much I’ll have to rearrange make this date work?”

Nodding, Aaliyah said, “Yep! I started preparations for you months ago. You’ll find the day and following week surprisingly clear, the perfect day for a wedding.”

“What? That’s preposterous. How could you possibly have known that…” started Alma, before being interrupted.

Aaliyah spoke over her, saying, “If you really want to know the variables that could be considered in determining that exact date from the moment I started preparations, you’ll need to clear your schedule for the next month. I assure you that you’ll give up trying to follow along by that time.”

“James! Help me here. You simply cannot be okay with this.” insisted Alma.

“What’s the date?” I asked.

“March twenty-third.” snapped Alma.

“Oh, look. My schedule’s free.” I told her, not bothering to actually check. I knew Aaliyah would have taken care of whatever was needed.

She sighed and stated “You’re incorrigible. You’ve let her control your life for too long.”

“No, I simply trust her to know what’s best far better than I’d ever manage. We traveled in time yesterday to make Jarod’s wedding. How often do you think Aaliyah takes advantage of Carl’s abilities? I imagine that Aaliyah’s already seen our wedding.” I told her.

Aaliyah nodded enthusiastically and asked “Want spoilers!?”

“No!” exclaimed Alma, though her anger was subsiding.

“She’s tempted to ask for a peek.” teased Aaliyah.

“I most certainly am not!” snapped Alma as she blushed.

“Oh, Alpy… I said you were tempted, not that you’d give in to your temptation.” explained Aaliyah, reaching up to pat her arm.

“There’s that as well.” I stated. “Knowing what everyone is thinking has to make planning easier.”

“James, she cannot possibly know what everyone is thinking. There are far too many people in this world.” she told me.

“No spoilers, boss-man, sir.” stated Aaliyah.

I had been thinking about the other worlds I had visited, considering if Aaliyah could read each civilization’s thoughts. Wait… spoilers… did that mean Alma would see them eventually? I would love to share them with her.

“Spoilers? What do you mean?” demanded Alma.

“Spoilers!” exclaimed Aaliyah. “I know a great guy who has trouble resisting spoilers. You wouldn’t believe in him either, Alpy! He’s a time traveler.”

“Lovely. Another one.” stated Alma with a frown.

“Oh, no. He’s not like Carl. He’s just a youngin’. Wonderful person though.” claimed Aaliyah.

“Great. Now she’s coming. I really was hoping she was heading elsewhere.” muttered Alma.

“Who?” I asked.

“Portentia, boss-man, sir. She wants to use a ticket tonight.” explained Aaliyah.

“Oh. Do I have plans?” I asked.

“Yes, master. Mother scheduled you to be out with Portentia tonight, so you have plans with her.” Mila stated over the speakers.

I had no clue where her bodies were at the moment. I hadn’t seen her since she brought me tea a bit ago.

“She’s cooking with Marco and instructing Aurora.” replied Aaliyah.

“Correct!” exclaimed Mila.

“Aurora? Is that Jarod’s lab assistant?” asked Alma.

“Also correct!” exclaimed Mila.

“I still haven’t met her. Jarod had mentioned her to me a while ago. He apparently thought I might be concerned about a girl frequenting the garage. Surely, he knows I trust him by now.” stated Alma.

Knowing Jarod, he probably figured out that Alma had some means of sensing people. I wasn’t surprised that he’d be a step ahead of any assumptions Alma might make, but how would Alma take Aurora’s tendency to remove her clothing?

Alma then went on to say, “I’m quite interested in meeting her at some point. Anyone Jarod would accept as a lab assistant simply must be fascinating.”

I wasn’t certain Alma would approve.

“She’s quite fantastic, I assure you.” insisted Mila.

“Oh. You’re busy.” stated Portentia disappointedly from the doorway.

I waved for her come in and said, “I have a moment. What do you need?”

“I was just wondering if tonight would work for you to be my sidekick. I wanted to use one of my tickets.” she told me.

“Sounds wonderful.” I assured her.

“Thank you! Mila’s fabricating a costume for you.” she informed me.

“Oh, this I simply must see. Shall we all head to Jarod’s lab?” inquired Alma.

I quickly tried coming up with an excuse not to go there, since I wasn’t inclined to have Alma meet Aurora when Jarod wasn’t around.

“Only if we get to force James into his costume! I want to see it!” exclaimed Aaliyah.

Well, maybe things would work out.

She winked at me.

Standing, I said, “Fine-fine. Let’s go.”

We all headed down to the lab under the garage, and I was quite thankful that Aurora was fully dressed for the moment, though I wondered if Mila somehow managed to get her that way in preparation for our arrival. If Aurora noticed us, she made no sign of it.

“How old is she?” asked Alma.

At nearly the same moment, Portentia inquired “Who is she?”

“She’s sixteen.” stated Mila. At the same time, she signed <Jarod’s lab assistant.>

While the group of us coming down the lift didn’t catch Aurora’s attention, Mila signing did. The girl started making hand motions herself, though nothing that had meaning to me. At that point, Mila turned her to face us. Aurora’s only reaction was to tilt her head as if trying to figure out what we were.

Smiling, Alma said, “Hello, Aurora. I’m Lady Alma Lucy Pendreigh V.”

No reaction.

Portentia introduced herself as well.

Aaliyah held up a paper, but I couldn’t see what was on it.

Aurora walked over to her, picked her up, and went back to working on something.

“Did Jarod mention that Aurora’s not socially adept yet?” I asked.

“No, but I guessed as much” replied Alma.

“Is something wrong with her?” asked Portentia, sounding concerned.

“I wouldn’t say anything was wrong, but she is different.” I told her. “She’s an autistic savant who Jarod says has remarkable potential.”

Alma, who had walked over to where Aurora was working, said, “I’m inclined to agree.”

“Oh?” I asked.

“Do you see what Aaliyah drew?” she asked.

I looked and said, “Some sort of schematic.”

“Aurora understood it at a glance and is implementing the design into her own work already, some sort of propulsion system going by the arrangement of the fans.” stated Alma.

“Correct!” exclaimed Mila. “Aurora’s helping Jarod design a lightweight flight system. Mother just pushed things forward a bit with her suggested revision to the power control circuit.”

“Couldn’t you do this even faster?” asked Alma.

“I certainly could do some of it faster, but Aurora’s also here to learn.” replied Mila.

As she talked, Aurora walked over to me, seeming to examine me. Then she grabbed the front of my shirt and walked back to where she was working, pulling me along. She let go the moment we were back at her computer, so she could move the mouse with her free hand.

“Does she want me to see something?” I asked.

Aaliyah looked up at me and said, “Nope. You were in the wrong place is all. She didn’t want you electrocuted.”

“Huh? By what?” I asked.

“She’s picturing a very large version of the machine in the room.” explained Aaliyah.

“Master, your suit’s finished!” exclaimed Mila.

I wasn’t honestly looking forward to tonight’s excursion, but looking like a superhero might be fun. Things could be worse.

#Best #Friend #For #Hire #Jovial #Times #Fantasy #Fiction #Story #Aaliyah #Alma #Aurora #Portentia

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fictiontheory · 4 years

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Review: The Outside by Ada Hoffman

Title: The Outside

Author: Ada Hoffman (http://www.ada-hoffmann.com/

Genre: Science Fiction

Publisher: Angry Robot (2019)

Pages: 400 (paperback edition)

Overall Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

TL;DR: Interesting concepts and world building, boring main character but very interesting antagonists. Needed development. Muddled story where lots of things keep happening, but none of it seems to be cohesive enough to justify this many pages.

Recommendation: Get it from the library or a (legal) free source.

Summary (from back cover): Autistic scientist Yasira Shien has developed a radical new energy drive that could change the future of humanity. But when she activates it, reality warps, destroying the space station and everyone aboard. The AI Gods who rule the galaxy declare her work heretical, and Yasira is abducted by their agents. Instead of simply executing her, they offer mercy – if she’ll help them hunt down a bigger target: her own mysterious, vanished mentor. With her homeworld’s fate in the balance, Yasira must choose who to trust: the gods and their ruthless post-human angels, or the rebel scientist whose unorthodox mathematics could turn her world inside out.

Full review: (some spoilers)

Reading The Outside was like reading a really promising first draft. The seeds of something amazing were there, but they just hadn’t grown enough. I was kind of promised a sci-fi/horror novel and didn’t get one.

There’s lots of plot but not much story, if that makes sense. Things keep happening until they stop. The moment where you go, “Oh, okay. That’s why this person bothered to tell me all this” just never happens. The book also does a lot of telling about things that are a big deal while spending time showing smaller, tedious, unimportant things.

The base premise is a good idea and done fairly well. I really liked the computer Gods that ruled over humanity and wanted a whole novel just about them.

Honestly, the biggest weakness is the protagonist, Yasira. She’s boring. Yes, she’s autistic, queer, and a character of color. None of those things is the problem. We badly need more of such characters, especially ones written by authors who (like Hoffmann) are themselves, for instance, autistic.

It’s that Yasira has lots of identities but no personality. I couldn’t tell you anything specific about Yasira as a person even after 400 pages.

Her ethnic and racial background felt iffy to me. She’s obviously supposed to have lineage that goes back to China. However, it’s done so that the author is never specific enough to risk criticism. One passage from the book (in which the character dreams of eating with her family) goes as follows: "heaping plates of noodles, meat, fruit, sauce, confectionery. The biggest bowls were for braised duck and tiny sweetbuns: tradition Riayin foods for a homecoming celebration (pg. 178)." Take a moment to consider how you’d describe a meal with your family. Would you just say “meat” or “noodles”? Me, I’d think “we tucked into my grandmother’s famous ‘company cabbage’“ or “dad had brushed a thick coat of barbecue sauce over the chicken on the grill”. I’d never just say “we had meat”. For that matter, braised duck is vague. Any culture right on on this Earth with sufficient contact with east Asian foods could be having braised duck. Sweetbuns are also vague. Moreover, if Yasira’s family and ancestors are supposed to have at least some Chinese lineage, why are their names in Western order (Given name first, then family name) and why are the given names all over the map? That bothered me a lot.

Race, ethnicity, nationality, and citizenship are not well done or even defined in this book, and I’m not comfortable giving someone kudos for having a protagonist of color when those things feel so sloppily done.

When mentioning other groupings of peoples, she never gives a sense of what makes being “Arinn” different from “Anetaian”. I get no sense the author ever sat back and really considered the issue or attempted to synthesize it into believable future cultures.

Just a note, the author keeps using the term “Earth-creole”. WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY. Creole is not a catch all term for “mishmash of languages”. Creole is a term, both linguistically and culturally, that’s very specific to the ways African people/cultures that were ripped from their homes intertwined with colonizers or with indigenous people in the places they were dragged to. If this language she’s invented is a mishmash of Earth languages, she can just call it “mixed language” or “Earthspeak” or something.

(Actually, the linguist in me is thinking that hundreds of years of separation across planets and language drift make the idea of an Earth based mish-mash language kind of improbable).

I appreciated Yasira being queer and that no queer characters died. However, Yasira’s girlfriend, Tiv, feels like she was added in there just to really prove Yasira’s not straight. Repeatedly, Yasira describes her as a “good girl”, which was creepy for me. Yasira thinks a lot about missing her, but there’s never a sense of a real, organic relationship between them. I’m not asking for a huge romance plotline or anything, but maybe just hint at what makes them work as a couple, what do they see in one another, what does Yasira miss besides just Tiv in general?

Yasira's autism is a frequent part of the novel and I definitely have to award points for that. A lot of stories will mention a character being autistic and then just shove it to the side. However, like a lot of things about Yasira, we're told a lot from a distance but the novel's half done before we get real, inside-her-head glimpses of what Yasira's experiences of being autistic are like. When the author does that, the protagonist gets more interesting.

Above all, Yasira is boring because she spends the book being pushed from thing to thing, carried along, a passive force. She doesn’t drive her own story. We keep getting told how she can’t afford to screw up or get it wrong, but it really just feels like author pops in to say, “Yeah, so, the fate of a planet’s resting on her shoulders, in case you can’t tell from the EVERYTHING ELSE IN THE BOOK, so that should make you like her.”

The resolution to the main plot, when Yasira finally becomes an active force, has no payoff. During a totally gratuitous torture scene, she links minds with the other students of Dr. Talirr (her former mentor and one of the antagonists). Except, those other students were background noise so it doesn’t mean much. Speaking of Dr. Talirr, she and the computer angel Akavi are the two most interesting characters in the book. Dr. Talirr doesn’t just drive her part of the plot, she plows forward unstoppably. She has the hubris to pick up a rock, hit the gods upside their heads rather than fretting about “not being good at gods” as Yasira does and then tell the gods that they’re not good at HER. Akavi, similarly, ruthlessly ducks and weaves, seeing the world a chessboard and refusing to lose the game, even if it means over turning the table. Both, also, go through a real transformation in this book that was fascinating to watch. Had the book been about them, I’d have given it five stars.

Which, perhaps, is the heart of this book’s ultimate weakness. This isn’t Yasira’s story, it’s theirs.

#reviews #book reviews #books #author: ada hoffmann #book: the outside #reads #rating: 2/5

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