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#never even heard about this one until now but it's canon to me now
houseofevanbuckley · 2 days
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I just have this head canon that one night while he and Tommy are just sleeping, Buck has this awful nightmare where he relives Eddie getting shot. Tommy is jarred away by Buck scrambling out of bet and rushing to the bathroom to wash his face in his confusion. It's a terrifying thing but once Tommy has Buck back in bed and Buck tearfully tells him what the dream was about, he's so understanding and amazing he actually bundles Buck up and they go to their Diaz boys together, no jealous or insecurity, just the five of them being their for each other like a whole ass family
This ! All of this !
I wish my baby wasn’t hurt that way but it is part of him now. It wouldn’t be his first nightmare while he sleeps with Tommy, but it’s the first one that’s strong enough that he can’t hide it. Waking up gasping for hair, his arm scratching at his chest trying to claw at his lungs to make them work! To make them do their job. The darkness of the room closing on him while his lungs are.still.not.working!
And then light appear and Tommy’s arms get around him, pulling him agasint his chest. He put his own hand on Buck’s chest, rubbing on it while he talks in his ear. Just repeating numbers again and again, getting Buck to focus on him. “ In, 1 2,3,4… Out 5,6,7,8,9… In,12,3,4”
It takes a while but he finally can get a breath in, making the stars that were starting to appear over his vision recede.
They stay silent for a while, tremors still running over Buck’s body, being replaced by Tommy hands rubbing along his arms, his chest.
Tommy doesn’t want to push Buck so he waits for him for a minute, and then two, and three.
Until he feels water on the arm rubbing Buck’s chest.
“Baby…” he says, pain in his voice at seeing his boyfriend like that.
He pulls him more agasint his own body, his chest covering the entirety of Buck’s back like a shield, and Buck breaks.
His breath stutters but the panic doesn’t come back. He talks then. He talks about that boy they saved. About how proud and happy Eddie was when they left his house. He was right. He saved that boy. And then the bullet. The blood. The hiding under a car. The dragging. And the wait. The wait for help, the time running away as they struggled to get away. To get to the real help, to the hospital.
And more wait.
Tears are flowing freely as he talks about it. Telling Christopher. Waiting again.
And Tommy gets it. He was in the military. He gets seeing his people shot, the one that are here to support you, to help you. Brothers and sisters. His heart break for his boy. His sweet boy who just want to save the world, to protect the ones he loves and even the ones he doesn’t.
He should have never been in this situation, none of them should have.
He takes a decision then. He may not be able to bring his own ghost back, but Buck doesn’t have these. His people are here, and they’re ready to support him.
He stands up when Buck finally calm down enough that he feel he can leave him for a few second.
He goes doesnstairs to get some water and grab his phone on the counter, sending a quick text to Eddie. Not saying too much, he knows Buck would rather run away than talks about his nightmare, but he says enough.
He goes up to Buck’s room, with some room temperature water, something that wouldn’t attack his throat or his body with some temperature chock.
He has him drink two glasses before he put the bottle on the bedside table and tells him to stand up while he grabs Buck’s comfy hoodie on his dresser and a sweatpants.
“Wha-what?” bucks asks, bewildered by clothes being thrown his way.
Tommy who comes back in front of him and kiss his birthmark
“Trust me, baby”
And Buck does. He does completely.
It takes them ten minutes to get fully ready. Tommy heard his phone buzz downstairs and when they go down he sees the answer he expected.
“Come on, baby” he says grabbing his boyfriend hand and gently pulling him outside and to his care.
“Where are we going ?”
“Where you need to be”
It takes them less than 20 minutes to reach the Diaz house, at 4 am the traffic is quiet all over town and Buck has recognized the way they were taking half way through their trip
“Tommy…”
“It’s ok baby,” he says, putting his hand on Buck’s thighs the rest of the way.
When they reach the house, Eddie is waiting at the door, hair in every direction, tank top and sweatpants on.
He welcomes them with a hug each, lingering in Buck’s when he feels how Buck sags against him and Tommy just watches with a soft smile and a grateful nod when Eddie looks his way.
They make their way inside and Christopher is sitting at the table, ice cream boxes open in front of him with some bowls, a documentary is playing on low volume on the tv and the boy smile at Buck, his own hair reflecting his dad’s.
“Guys,” whispers Buck, awed that anyone would do that. That they’d wake up for him, be there for him. He turns back to Tommy who took him there, kissing him on the lips softly.
“Thank you,” he says, eyes shining.
“Come on baby,” says Tommy, guiding him to the table, “gotta be quick before Christopher steals all the chocolate mint.”
They stay there the rest for he night and well into the day. Being there for Buck this night, like they’d be there for the others on an other night. Like a family should
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kindlespark · 1 day
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sam i didnt even watch fhjy but can you tell me more of ur thoughts abt kipperlilly? any thoughts even stream of consciousness, she seems so teenager rage gone wrong im so fascinated by her
HJBFESJBFEKSFS THIS IS SO FUNNY OFC ok this is going to be a range of thoughts about the reactions i've seen from both ends of the rat grinder Discourse™
i think it's fine to be like, yeah, what kipperlilly's anger stems from is like deeply unsympathetic and comes from a very privileged status. i think being like "no that's normal for a teen girl" is silly. she is very much not normal she's a little upper-middle class brat and i love her. i love that she's so deeply distasteful and unappealing to people LOL. hate when female characters have to be smoothed down to be liked! like we don't have to downplay her negative traits when people are obsessed with male serial killers all the time etc etc
BUT i also think people forget that like... the bad kids were reading private thoughts she shared with her therapist (which is a massive invasion of privacy)! like of course it was fucked up. that's why she was going to a therapist lmao!!! it stresses me out that people are this vitriolic about a teen character who is pretty explicitly mentally ill and trying to get better about it but is being manipulated by a deity of rage and possibly her adult vice principal like. you don't have to LIKE her but calling for her to be violently murdered is wild to me. the bad kids had never even HEARD of her before this season and you can metagame about brennan not having invented her character yet all you want but in canon u gotta assume she was successfully keeping that rage down until she got got and is now being actively corrupted by a powerful rage deity lmaoooo
and like! she got her narrative punishment!! the monkey's paw curled and she lost her best friend she's got her traumatic backstory now!!! she's already suffering and at her lowest i don't need her to die (again!)
i think brennan is past the point of making teen characters irredeemable so i can only hope that the cast follows through on that bc i feel like redemption and healing from trauma is one of the strongest themes in fantasy high like i bawled my eyes out in every aelwyn and adaine scene. which is why it's really funny to me that siobhan is kipperlilly's biggest hater because i feel like she's a great mirror to adaine's spite and aelwyn's redemption..... like siobhan's characters are all very appealing to me because of their rage. god im hoping and praying they don't kill the rat grinders in the finale god bless
oh final petty thing i think saying kipperlilly's name wrong was only funny the first 200 times <3 love u all mwa
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lizaluvsthis · 3 days
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Soery if this isnt related to br or something
What are your main japanese songs (if you have any)
That can either relate for the two gay characters?
SAY NO MORE FELLAS!
Wowaka by Unknown Mother Goose - SMG4 redesign
Four deals with his struggles at being Perfect.
Rolling Girl by Miku Hatsune - SMG3 recolor/redesign
Three is trying his hardest all the time even after his arc.
The past re-encounters that gave him so much deja vu and all the bad things even tho he tries so many times making it all up with it. He couldn't.
(He does SH and the only way for him to think about is dying- yet Four prevents him from doing that)
Kokoro by Rin ft. Len Kagamine (duet) - SMG34
Four as the robot and Three... well... is the professor. (For those who heard the duet song you will understand that)
Vivi by kenshi yonezu - SMG3
Three slips away from Four and even ends up mising him even more.
Orange by 96Neko - SMG4
Three dies. Four is there to stay and cherish all the moments he and Three had made from their times, now he always visits his grave. Four finally moves on and Three could only say "goodbye"
Sigh by Rin Kagamine - SMG4
Four doesn't know why he was always sad, turns out his long dead-forgotten friend appeared as an angel to return the smiles he had missed.
Kokoronashi by Hikaru Station - SMG3
Three suffers at himself and well finds it hard to deal with emotions...
Knife by [vocaloids i fgt] - SMG4
Short straight [if you know and heard this song]
Four avenge Three's death after Niles killed him
Therefore You and Me by Eve ft. 38ban - SMG34
Ever long lasting slow burn. Recolored - redesign
Ikanaide (Don't Go) by Mafumafu - SMG3
From Recolor to 1st-2nd Redesign
Three's villain role is out of his hands now that he became a tritagonist. However he still looks out for SMG4 even after everything...
But somedays when he and Four get into basic arguements he still fears that one day he would stop talking to him and that he would rather hang out much to his friends.
That Four might eventually forget about what he had just done something good to him.
The Lost One's Weeping ft. Kagamine Rin - SMG4
Redesign vs. Recolor.
Four would recall his past about his senior high where he never understood nothing and the self comparisson between him and the rest of the students are highly at this rate.
It triggered him so much that he never wanted to get back to it, he is only recalling this from his vision - seen as his memories until he sees his recolored version telling him that he already made the decision and that there is nothing else he could do.
Nonsense Speaker by Miku Hatsune - SMG3
Smg3 even tho if he was a tsundere... he still has thoughts about his relationship with four... and the events they both shared if he'd still even see himself as the past or look into his bright self again.
Kagerou Days by Shizen no Teki ft. Miku Hatsune - SMG3
Basic timeloop
Three tried so many times to prevent four from dying with his self hatred side. Yet. He was the one to die at the end.
Racing Into The Night by YOASOBI - SMG4
Four didn't know why three was sad. (They both felt all sad and stuff-)
So when three said he wanted to die- four did too.
Suki Kirai (Like-Dislike) by Rin and Len - SMG34
YOU KNOW A SUN X MOON DYNAMIC ALREADY ITS OBVIOUS.
Feathers Across the Seasons by Kagamine Rin and Len - SMG3
Smg4 was the mysterious feather being
Three is the diseased human person.
Bonus for other characters:
@shygirl4991 @alianarepasa
High Range ft. Kagamine Len - Heart 3
It kinda does fit for Heart since he does use his fem voice not quite often
I'll Quit Singing ft. Kagamine Len - Book 3
Nothing else I just like to think that book plays with a piano
The World is Mine by Miku Hatsune - Spade 3
SPADE SINGING THIS? YES. YES I DID.
(ITS CANON BECAUSE HIS PERSONALITY TRAIT SAID SO)
The Disappearance of Hatsune Miku - Producer4
What huh personality disappearance? Yes.
Daughter of Evil by Kagamine Rin - Delinquent4
Servant of Evil by Len Kagamine Len - Producer4
I think you kmow this story already. Hehe.
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targaryen-dynasty · 4 months
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PRAY FOR ME.
Dark!Prince Regent!Aemond x niece!Reader
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Trying to persuade you to declare yourself for their side in the war of succession, Aemond relies on different methods to make your façade crumble.
WARNINGS: SEXUAL CONTENT-MINORS DNI; DUB-CON, p in v, dry humping, petting, breeding, power imbalance, praise kink, humiliating, degrading, canon typical incest/targcest, no mention of reader’s appearance, Dark!Prince Regent Aemond is a warning himself
WORDS: 5.3 K
NOTES: The title is inspired by Kendrik Lamar‘s song, as it’s about loss, loyalty, sacrifice and redemption. Something reader struggles with in this. This is also dedicated to and written for @black-dread. I‘ll spoil you rotten for as long as I’m on this app. ILU.
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You had lost track of how long you had been forced to stay isolated in your chambers. It could have been days, but it also could have been many moons by now. 
The only company you got were the serving girls coming three times a day to serve you food and something to drink, and bring you water for a bath – everything else was left for you to do on your own. 
It was a cold comfort that you got to spend your days in the chambers you had occupied during your childhood, but still better than to be stuck in one of the cells or the dark dungeons. 
Apart from the Dowager Queen visiting you a few times in the early days, trying to persuade you to side with them in the upcoming war of succession, you hadn’t heard from anybody else. You did not even know what progress your mother’s side had made over the time you had been locked away, and what precipitations they had to suffer. 
Deep down you knew Alicent was only after your dragon to gain support, because, with not more than three adult dragons, they clearly were outnumbered. But that knowledge, however, didn’t stop the doubts about your mother from rising. 
You had not expected to be saved by them, but you had firmly believed to receive at least one letter by raven in secret – yet not one had come. 
There were enough people loyal to your father, mother or both of them in the Red Keep, and the chances of one raven reaching you were not too far-fetched. 
It was your deceased grandsire that had stated back then that the crown could not stand strong if the House of the Dragon remained divided, and now it was tearing itself down. 
The tension truly had simmered at the last supper you shared with all of them — if it hadn’t been for your uncle to raise a toast to your strong half-brothers, forcing them and your parents to depart for Dragonstone in the midst of the night. 
You had stayed behind, wanting to make up for the time you had lost with your grandsire ever since your family had relocated. 
What proved to be a terrible mistake. 
In the following morning, you had awoken to a commotion outside of your chamber’s doors, only to find it locked and with no way for you to escape. 
You hardly learned what had been going on when three maids scurried into your chambers no less than six hours later, bathing you and dressing you for an important occasion, yet not telling you what it was. 
A queasy feeling had weighed you down back then, which was confirmed by Alicent coming into your chambers right after to briefly inform you of Viserys’ passing and their plans to put Aegon on the throne, forcing you to attend the coronation.
She had assured your safety — for as long as you would declare yourself for Aegon. 
For a fortnight she had blessed you with her presence, after you had witnessed the coronation and the frightening exit of Rhaenys and Meleys. She had inquired about your well-being after, but not without asking if and how you had chosen. 
You had stated that you would never dare declare yourself for your mother’s usurper, and the will to keep your word was strong at the very beginning, until it wasn‘t anymore, the choice fickle and marked by your doubts. By your loneliness. 
Suddenly, Alicent had stopped visiting you. You assumed she was done hearing you reject her offer, and even though you loathed her, it had been nice to have someone to talk to – even if it was forced and merely for her own benefit. 
Most of your days you sat in silence, waiting for the moment someone would open the door to bring you to the place where they would take your head and end your life. 
But at the same time you knew that it made more sense for them to keep you alive and locked up, minimizing the chances of having you fight against their forces or even risking another enemy to claim Vermithor. 
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Darkness had overtaken King’s Landing some time ago when the rustling of metal caught your attention, a deep voice booming behind the locked doors. Never before in your life had you shut a book so quickly, almost throwing it aside in plain fear.  
The dark mop of Criston Cole’s hair was the first thing you saw, and your instincts forced you to bring as much space as possible between you and him. 
Despite your father being none other than the Rogue Prince himself, having learned it by accident after eavesdropping on a conversation you should not have heard, you lacked his fighting experience and hadn’t been trained with the sword. All efforts to get away from the man they dubbed the Kingmaker therefore were fruitless. 
It might have been the mistrust caused by Rhaenys‘ escape, highly doubting your refusal to come with him was intimidating enough, but a thick ribbon was tied around your wrists to keep you bound and secured as he guided you out of your chambers. 
It was clear it was a volatile decision, assuming he had taken the ribbon from one of the maids' clothing, but you were glad he had not put you in shackles. 
“His Grace wishes to speak to you,“ another guard accompanying you two barked after an endless amount of pestering, annoyed that you only wanted to learn if it was the fateful night the Stranger would take you. 
The path they led you along was not unfamiliar, and when the heavy doors to the Throne Room opened, you were roughly shoved into the darkness, barely illuminated by the light a few torches and candles granted. 
At the far end of the room on the massive throne sat who you assumed was your uncle Aegon, the Conqueror's crown atop his silver mane and shimmering in the light. 
His presence felt heavy, overwhelming even, and forced your eyes to dart to the ground, watching every step as Criston all but pushed you towards the seat that was destined for your mother. 
Preparing to meet your fate, the color drained from your face as you spotted the wrong uncle sitting on the throne, looking exactly like he had the last time you two were in the same room.
It was the evening before the Stranger had taken your grandsire, the only difference was the crown forged for none other than Aegon the First sitting on his head. 
The Iron Throne loomed large behind his lithe frame, looking every bit as intimidating as Aemond in his all black attire, clad in leather from his boots up to the eyepatch, and a dagger strapped to his waist. 
His one good eye studied you carefully, almost curiously, remaining on you even as Aemond rose from the throne, stepping down to approach you. With the intensity of his gaze, you felt almost bare in the black nightgown you wore, though the high neckline and long skirt didn’t give anything of your modesty away. 
“Leave us,” Aemond’s voice eventually pierced through, the words said in a tone void of any emotion. 
You heard Criston‘s armor clink behind you. “But, Your Grace, I–”
“Rest assured I can handle her,” Aemond interrupted. 
And then the man behind you left the room at once, leaving only you and your uncle. It was eerily quiet, quite different from the Throne Room you knew back as your grandsire occupied the large seat. 
You gazed down at the ribbon still tied around your wrists, tugging at it once to distract yourself from the steely gaze of Aemond burning through your skin, unsettling you. 
“Do you know why I brought you here?” he asked in the same cold tone, sizing you up. 
When your head tilted up again, meeting his eye, you spotted it darting towards your neck, causing your skin to heat up. Briefly looking to the side, you shrugged your shoulders. “To get rid of me, I assume,” you replied, trying hard to suppress the shaking in your voice. 
A low ‘hm’ rumbled in his chest, and you spotted his lilac eye moving from yours downwards to your neck again. Something must have caught his attention, causing him to smirk as if he had seen a particularly fine artwork. 
When he reached to slightly tug the neckline of your nightgown down, the hairs on the back of your neck stood up, and your eyes widened – intrigued or afraid, you weren’t quite certain. 
The pendant of your necklace was pinched between his fingers, and you glanced down to spot his thumb dragging over the small sapphire in the center of it.
It was the Valyrian steel necklace he had gifted you to your name day, acquired on one of his rare journeys onto the streets of King‘s Landing long before he had lost his eye. 
“You were meant to be mine, you know?” His voice remained mostly unemotional, yet a lilt of affection became evident in his tone for a second, the corners of his lips quirking up. It appeared as if he had thought back to the times you two had spent together at court, without a care and without the burdens of the crown on your shoulders.
The frown on your face encouraged him to carry on, a smirk still adorning his lips. “Do you remember when we practiced dancing when we were ten-and-one?” Oh, how you remembered. Aegon had always been a drunken fool, stepping on your feet and pushing you around out of the rhythm of the music, while Aemond had been nothing less than gentle and careful with you, laughing whenever you or he stepped onto each other's toes. 
“I never thought someone could have such delicate feet, such–”
“Why am I here, Aemond?” you pressed, not wanting to dwell on the fond memories you had shared even longer with your heart rate rising with every word. 
His smirk faltered for a split second, the eye that wasn’t concealed by black leather widening. One of his hands found the small of your back, and he used the grip to pull you towards him. “I could treat you right,” he said, his voice growing softer. 
It was evident he knew how he made you feel. He knew you had admired him back then, you had confessed it before your family left for Dragonstone, and he just assumed you still did. You had admired his boldness and courage, his wit — and nothing had changed. 
But it also felt as if he merely intended to persuade you for the same reasons his mother had tried to do, the fluttering emotions flattening out as quickly as they had soared through your body. 
You took a step back in an attempt to create some space between you. Aemond didn’t hold onto you, he didn’t stop you, but his hand stayed in the air as if he meant to reach for you again. But he didn’t. 
“I know, and I can‘t…,“ you said. I want to, but I can‘t betray my own mother, my own blood, was what you thought. “No.“ 
The lingering feelings of loneliness and abandonment had you wanting to give in. You wanted to give in to him more than anything. It was what you had desired for so, so long. But you had to remain strong, even though you were left to fend all by yourself, for none of your family had come to save you. 
“No, I won’t declare myself for Aegon,“ you said, looking him straight in the eye. You tried to keep your voice cold, though it was clear that something inside of you tried to crawl to the surface. 
An arrogant smile etched onto his features at your words. He could see your resistance weaken, spot your eyes flickering between his good one and his lips. Your attraction was not as hidden to him as you would have liked it to be. 
“Your fears are unfounded, little niece.“ He caressed your cheek with a gentle touch, while mischief flickered in the lilac of his eye, juxtaposing his actions. “Let me show you just how well I could treat you. Let me show you that you matter… to me.“
Your fears were not unfounded. Not in the prospect of committing treason should your mother ever ascend the throne. But it was his gentle touch that made you weak, though you tried to hold onto the last threads of your resolve, trying your best to remain loyal to the side of the family that had obviously long abandoned you to rot in the viper’s nest. 
“No,” you muttered softly in response, looking away once more. I must not, for I shall regret this, you thought. The fear to betray your mother by giving in to him was too big, but in the end it was far outweighed by your lust for him.
It was as if Aemond could spot the exact moment in which your resistance started to crumble, because in a swift movement, he had his hand right where it had rested on your waist before, and used the grip to turn you around, forcing your back flush against his chest. 
The gasp you released was loud, but nothing compared to the way your heartbeat pounded in your ears as his other hand clasped around your throat, your tied hands immediately coming up to seize his wrist. 
He had heard one no too much, his patience running thin. “I’ll show you that you belong to me,” he rasped into your ear, a shiver running down your spine that settled at the apex of your legs. 
Squeezing your throat once, Aemond urged you forwards, shoving you towards one of the big column statues of the Throne Room. 
Without tilting your head up, it wasn’t as if you had the chance to do so with your cheek pressed against the cold stone, you knew it was Aenys the First looking down at you two. And if he would've known what was going to take place right under the keepsake dedicated to his memory, he would’ve ordered his dragon to burn the keep to ashes at once.
Aemond’s weight pressed you against the column, your hands pinned over your head by one of his large ones. With his lips close to your ear, hot and heavy breath fanning over your flushed skin, you couldn’t even bring yourself to care about the trap you found yourself in. 
“I’ll show you what you are,” he said. You firmly believed for him to make a jab at you, similar to what he had said at supper, but it didn’t come. Instead, his lips landed on your neck, not lingering long enough to press more than one chaste kiss to your skin before he pulled back to speak again, “mine.”
You weren’t quite sure whether you wanted to leave or not – for your mind had gone blank. The possessiveness laced within his cold voice, the burning where his lips had pressed a kiss to your neck, and his hands on your body were the only things on your mind. 
The nightgown you wore was thin enough for you to feel even the faintest of his touches, fingertips roaming over the curve of your waist down to your arse, driving you to insanity. 
Mewling and squirming in his grasp like a trapped kitten, the husky chuckle behind you gave away that he was more than enjoying this. You were giving in, your resolve crumbling, and he knew you were enjoying it just as much as him. 
“There, is that my sweet, little niece I missed from court?” he whispered softly, while his hand fisted the skirts of your nightgown, lifting it enough to allow his hand to snake underneath. Goosebumps prickled on your skin, much more at the sudden realization of just how close he was. 
His fingers mindlessly ghosted over the linen of your smallclothes, the outside of your thigh, but never coming close enough to where you wanted him most. 
“Did you miss me, princess?” There was a sense of affection weaving itself through his cold tone, only for him to emphasize your title in such a condescending manner, it had your heart beating wildly in your chest. 
When there didn’t come an answer, he connected his palm with your arse in a way that had your whole body jerking, your thighs trying to squeeze together to diminish the aching. But Aemond had his foot firmly planted between yours, his knee positioned high enough to make any movements impossible. 
“I asked you a question,” the prince behind you snarled, the grip of his hand on your wrists bruising, feeling as if he meant to crush your bones. “Did you miss me?”
“Y-yes,” your voice was low, almost shy, “yes, Aemond, I missed you.” 
A satisfied hum rumbled in his chest, and, trying to catch a glimpse of him from over your shoulder, you spotted his characteristic smirk on his lips, seeming even more devilish with the red rubies of the Conqueror's Crown shimmering in the dim light. 
His fingers traced over the contours of your thigh before they dragged over your clothed cunt more firmly, and you choked on a moan, trying your best to stifle the sound in case anyone were to barge into the Throne Room.
But seeing how much your body ached for him, how badly you wanted him, Aemond didn’t care whether you were too loud or not. 
He just enjoyed having you at his mercy, unable to really see him or get away from him. You were completely depending on him and whatever he wanted to do to and with you. 
Aemond pressed his clothed member against your lower back, letting you feel its hardness and making his desire for you clear. 
You were unable to escape him, but you didn’t even want to for the heat emanating from him drove you insane, not able to contain your desire and passion any longer. Your smallclothes were clinging to your soaked womanhood, and the aching you felt between your legs started to become uncomfortable. 
When his head tipped towards yours, your eyes searched for his, wanting to lock gazes and beg for him to finally free you from his torments. But his good eye didn’t meet yours. 
The pressure on your wrists released with his arm snaking around your waist, holding you tightly in place while he buried his face in the crook of your neck. 
“Four moons did I have to walk these halls with the knowledge of you waiting for me behind one of these doors,” he gruffed into your ear. “Do you know how badly I have longed for this moment to happen? How long I had to wait to finally be able to claim you as mine? There will be no one else desiring to have you once I am done with you.”
You didn’t answer him for your voice was gone as you panted for air. Your body was shaking, wanting him oh so desperately. 
“All you have to do is to swear to me, niece,” he said, his lips moving along your neck, nibbling and licking over your skin. It should have concerned you. It should have felt like a knife to your heart. And your body felt as if it was on fire, but it was ignited by his lips and fingers working the most sensitive spots on your body, not by his words. “Just give me your word, and you will be mine.”
That was the moment his true intentions showed, juxtaposed by his lingering touches and the desire in his voice. 
His caresses had pushed you to your limits. You were drunk on him, drunk on his warmth, his scent and the dominance he displayed over you. “I swear, I-I swear,” you stammered, “All of it, I pledge myself to you, Aemond.”
Aemond had you, and there was no way to refuse him now, no way to stop him. You were giving into his touches, his words, his presence. You were his.
As you arched your back against his frame, he was caught off guard and took a step back, inhaling a sharp breath at the friction your arse created against his stiff member. You seized the opportunity and spun on your heels, staring at Aemond with wide, lust blown eyes. 
He was on you in a matter of seconds, backing you firmly up against the column again. But this time, his mouth was on yours, kissing you with a burning need. Slipping past your lips, his tongue moved to explore your mouth, sliding back and forth along yours. 
You whimpered into the kiss, the heat of desire weakening your knees. Aemond pressed himself against you, his body molding around yours as his hands traveled over your sides, consuming you entirely. 
With his hands trailing down to your thighs, he hoisted you up and wrapped them around his waist, supporting your weight as he slowly walked towards the Iron Throne. It seemed as if he knew the path by heart, your lips not parting once for him to watch his step. 
Sitting down on the throne, you sat astride him, hunched over and gazing down at him, while his half-lidded eye studied you carefully. It darted down to your bound wrists, and his nimble fingers were quick to reach for his dagger and slice through the fabric. 
You massaged the reddened flesh with a soft hiss, though you were not sure it was prompted by the ministrations of your own hands or Aemond’s harshly digging into your hips. You closed your eyes, frighteningly aware of the dagger pinched between his digits, and tried to squirm away from his grasp with a jerk, dragging your clothed cunt over the protruding bulge in the front of his breeches. 
A blush covered your cheeks as it dawned on you what you had done, more so as you heard him draw in a sharp breath, and you sheepishly folded your hands in front of you, looking down at them. 
Raising an eyebrow, Aemond leaned back against the throne, his lips quirking into a smirk. “Your lack of self-control humors me,” he said, his voice mocking and full of judgment. You swallowed thickly, heat blossoming in your belly. “I only let you have a little bit of me, but you seem so desperate to have me fully.” 
With his hands still on your hips, he started to guide them back and forth, dragging your cunt over his hard cock. His head tipped back slightly, and the bump in his throat bobbed as he swallowed each time you rutted against his member. 
The coil in your belly tightened slowly, and encouraged you enough to grind your hips against him all by yourself, your breathy whimpers growing in volume. 
“All it took for you to give in was my cock, mh?” he groaned, one hand entangling in your hair to bring your face level with his, “and I have yet to stuff it inside.”
A breathy whimper was all you managed to release at his words, your lips agape with shaky breaths escaping them. The movements of your hips didn’t stop once, chasing the pleasure that built inside of you. 
Half-lidded eyes fixed with his good one, and, even in the dim light, you could see that the lilac hue of it was almost eclipsed by black. 
“Pray tell, how badly do you want my cock, niece?” he asked, a lilt of mockery in the baritone of his voice. But you could not form a coherent thought. The profanity of his words, and the way his hardness pressed so firmly against your aching cunt robbed you of your ability to think. 
“Do not make me repeat myself,” he warned, fingers digging into your flesh to halt your movements, and causing the pleasure to dissolve just as quickly as it came. 
Pouting at the loss of friction, you were forced to find your voice again. “So, so badly,” you whined, sounding more desperate than intended. “Give-Give it to me… please.”
You stared at him with wide eyes, eagerly anticipating his next move, though there was disappointment igniting inside of you as Aemond merely tsked at your words. “My my, look at you. You came here convinced the Stranger would take you in your mother’s name, and now you are begging for my cock, begging me to finally put an end to your suffering. Who would have thought that my cock would turn you into a traitor?”
You would have felt ashamed and guilty you gave in to him, to the enemy, but the only thing on your mind right now was the longing to be filled and consumed by him. If there was a traitor, it was your mother for not once inquiring about you or saving you from your misery. 
Caressing your cheek in an unusually tender manner, you all but melted into his touch. “But how could I ever say no to my sweet, little niece? You have been such a good girl, let me give you what you desire.” 
Aemond bundled the skirt of your nightgown in one hand, revealing your undergarments to him. In a careful movement, he dragged the sharp tip of the dagger from the curve of your waist down your side, hooking it beneath the waistband to easily slice through the linen. 
As he pushed it to the side, his eye fixed your exposed womanhood like a man starved, ready to feast on you at any given moment. It was amusing to watch him recklessly throw the dagger aside and fumble with the laces of his breeches, a stark contrast to the stern and cold demeanor he had kept before. 
Grasping hold of your hips firmly, he lifted them slightly before he aligned the tip of his cock with your cunt. “Let us see how well you can take me.“
He pressed his cock against your tight entrance, feeling the resistance as he prepared to ease into you. One hand moved to cup your arse, supporting you, and allowing you to lower yourself on him. And, with a swift buck of his hips, a seemingly impatient Aemond met yours halfway, filling you completely at once. 
Your face contorted in pleasure at the sensation, the burning of the stretch quickly melting into a feeling of plain bliss. “Gods,” you whimpered, clenching tightly around him. 
With slow grinds, you started to adjust to his size, growing bolder and bolder with each swivel of your hips over his. 
“Feels so–” 
“Good, I know,” he finished your sentence, the words accompanied by a raspy groan. His head tipped back against the throne, his hands mindlessly tracing over your sides as he groaned a ‘you feel so fucking good’ that had you biting your bottom lip, keening at the praise.
Every now and then, Aemond bucked his hips up into yours, the intensity forcing you to topple forwards, causing you to plant your hands firmly on his shoulders. His cock was bullying the sweet spot inside of you that made you see stars, causing your fingers to dig into his shoulders. 
One of his hands settled at your breast, groping it through the thin fabric of your shift. His fingers pinched and teased your hardened bud, and with the added pleasure, your moans grew more wanton. 
“Shit, you’re taking me so well,” he rambled, seemingly cunt struck by the way your walls clenched and released around him every time you sank down his hard member. “You may be a princess, but I shall make you my Queen. You belong to me.” Though his voice was still gruff, it had gained an added layer of intimacy, reflecting in the way he looked up at you.  
Your heart hammered in your chest at the sight and his words, and the pace of your hips faltered as he brought his hand up to grab a hold of the Conqueror's Crown, taking it off his head to place it on top of yours. 
“It looks better on you than it ever did on him,“ he panted, his voice genuine as he stared up at you in a way that sent a shiver down your spine. 
You moved a hand upwards to hold the crown steady, afraid it would fall to the ground with the impact of your hips colliding with his. Your body moved on its own accord, hips grinding down on him, riding him as you chased your pleasure. 
You moaned softly, “By the Seven, Aemond, so good.“
Spurred on by the sight of you wearing the crown and fucking yourself stupid on his cock, he firmly planted his feet on the ground to piston his hips up into yours, meeting you halfway. 
The sound of skin slapping on skin was not really audible with him barely pushing his breeches down enough to free his hard cock, the hem of his tunic sitting low enough to cover most of his lower stomach. But there was no need for it, for your heavy pants, grunts and moans were loud enough to echo off the walls of the empty Throne Room. 
Aemond’s thumb started to drag over the little bud at the apex of your legs, sending a bolt of pleasure up your spine, causing the knot in your belly to tighten rapidly. Your breath quickened, and your walls clenched around him so tightly, you were not sure if they even unclenched once. 
“I shall fill you up, put a child in you,” he grunted, gaze fixed on where you both were connected, watching himself repeatedly disappear inside of your tight cunt. “Do you want that?” His tone made it clear that it was not a question, but you still whimpered several yesses in return, merging into a loud cry of his name as your peak washed over you. 
He drove his hips up into yours, fucking you through your high despite your body crouching forwards and your hips stilling, merely clinging to him for dear life as the pleasure soared through your body, coursing through your veins like liquid fire. 
“And when you’re with my child, you will not be able to get away from me,” he rambled, inhaling sharply as he felt his stones tighten, nearing his own peak. “You are-,“ he hissed in between, “You are all mine.”
You were trembling astride him, barely registering his words and whining when you felt how your peak’s contractions were practically forcing the spend out of your uncle‘s cock, milking him for every drop of his seed. 
There was silence between you, safe for your heavy breathing, as if you both waited for the other’s voice to cut through it. 
The realization of the repercussions your actions and words would bring settled a few moments later, when the haze of your peak cleared, and you spotted Aemond looking up at you with a smug smirk on his lips. 
“The crown on your head is a promise of the fact that I will make you my Queen,” he purred, a cold edge to his voice. Aemond licked his lips, and grazed his hands over your hips, squeezing your flesh. “I have claimed you, and I will make use of you however and whenever I see fit.”
As he spoke, you slowly realized what he meant and felt yourself growing warm inside all over again, clenching around his flaccid member. It felt exhilarating to know that he would not hesitate to take full advantage of you, and there was excitement filling your body. But most importantly, it felt as if you finally found a place where you belonged, where you were wanted and seen. 
“That is how it is going to be,” you whispered, nodding once to emphasize your words. “I-I am all yours.”
Aemond leaned forwards and rested his forehead against yours, releasing a deep sigh before his smooth voice interrupted the short moment of intimacy and proximity.
“With you now sworn to me, I believe ‘tis time to bring you back in the fold. There is much that has happened since you last were at court.”
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Taglist: @heimtathurs @croatianprincess @nina2697 @sirenangelroyal @malfoytargaryen @thetaygaryen @wintrr13 @winter-soldier-101 @kyuupidwrites @boofy1998 @thekinslayersswordhand @sagelovesreading @jiminie-08 @doublesparrows @at-a-rax-ia @fan-goddess @recorddust @tsujifreya @melsunshine @docmartinis @drwstarkeyy @kazuyatokue @nockerin @moonlightfoxx @bbgmonsay @thatmysteriousblog @ashovertheriver @black-dread @watercolorskyy @nothingqueens @urmomsgirlfriend1 @lovelykhaleesiii @hypocritic-trash-baby @darylandbethfanforever9 @snowystark @goldyfishsstuff @connorsui @melinskis
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kinopio-writes · 2 months
Note
Hello dearie!!
How are you? I hope you're doing well!
I saw that your asks were open,and your content is really cool and silly,So I decided to leave you a nice ask to enjoy!
Could I have a headcanon platonic! Alastor,Vox and Husk finding a random child next to their dead mother, except that they don't really understand that she's dead and think she's sleeping,so they pity the child and take them in?
The child is really polite and nice,pretty calm,too. Sure,they do child stuff,like running around,being excited,etc,but they still are more calm than others.
They always talk about their mother,how she's the only one left,and how they love her.
Would the characters say the truth? Would they lie?
I just love hurt/comfort and platonic relationships so :3
Anyways,I hope that's not too much,and that you enjoy writing this!
Have a really nice day,don't forget to drink and take breaks!
Stay proud!
-Nina <33
A/N: Thank you for the reminders, heh. Btw, I’m going to have to change the reasons as to why they took you in because I just don’t see characters like Alastor and Vox taking you in because of pity. Sorry about that. The rest is untouched. You’ll still get a bit of that hurt/comfort (mostly from Husk, lol. Both Alastor and Vox are non-existent, but Alastor is somehow better than Vox).
Warnings: Mentions of death
———
Alastor, Husk, and Vox adopting a deceased mom’s child
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Alastor
• Alastor paid no mind to the dead corpse
• it didn’t really look that appetizing anyway
• “How unfortunate.” You heard a weird voice from behind you as a hand was placed on your shoulder. “A child mourning in the demise of its mother. Tragic, really. You have my condolences.”
• “What are you talking about, mister?” You stared up at the mysterious man, watching his eyes flick from your left to right eye while his grin only grew as the seconds went by
• “I think you’ve just found yourself the perfect dwelling,” he abruptly said, letting go of your shoulder to fix his bowtie as he sprung back to life. “Why don’t you come with me?”
• “But what about my mother?”
• “She is in good hands, I can assure you.” He offered his hand to you. “Come along, now. Children shouldn’t dwell long in places like these.”
• and so he took you in to be a patron at his hotel
• I mean, what’s more easier to redeem than a child? (assuming you’re a sinner. I don’t know if it’s canon anymore that only hellborns can reproduce. Look at Cannibal Town’s people)
• he intended to leave you in the rest of the residents’ care while they could only guess what his actual motivation was for taking you in
• but it seemed you ended up favoring him more than the rest
• you’d follow him around like a duckling—a lost puppy—you’re attached to him like a leech
• and you’re so well-behaved, too
• up until he leaves your sight
• he actually leaves the hotel a lot more often now because of that
• he finds you wrecking chaos in the hotel entertaining as hell
• and the fact that the others beg him to come back to calm you down
• I don’t think you would ever know what happened to your mother
• even when you talk about her a lot
• those rambles never really prompt him to say anything
• well, it’s not as if he knew what happened to her
• but, hey, at least he listens!
• maybe it’s because he feels a little nostalgic hearing the way you talk about her…
———
Husk
• Husk was fucking spooked when he found you lying beside your dead mother
• not because of the corpse, but because of the way you were staring at him
• with eyes dull and wide open, just like your mother
• while Husk wouldn’t have given two shits if it was a grown-ass adult, you were a child
• so he took you in
• “But what about my mother?”
• “Shi—I, uh—your momma will tag along soon. Now c’mon. She wouldn’t want you out here alone.”
• since Husk is constantly around the hotel, there were never really instances where you wreaked havoc
• you just silently watch him tend the bar and sometimes talk about your mother
• your talks about how much you love her make him feel pretty guilty for some reason
• but he’d probably tell you when you’re older enough
• only if you were asking him about her though
• he wouldn’t want to have to sit you down and tell you something that sensitive of a topic when you didn’t even ask
• “Why don’t I have a mother?” you would suddenly ask when you turned 18
• today was your birthday. Charlie insisted on having a little party for you just like every year. But you didn’t want one; you wanted to be with Husk for the day
• the man in question sighed
• he knew you were building up the courage to ask all day
• “I’m gonna give it to you straight, kid, I don’t know what exactly happened to her. All I know is that she’s in a better place.”
• “Oh…”
• “Do you…wanna talk about it?” He continued, voice a little unsure, “Not as a bartender…but as a dad.”
• you smiled, grateful. “I think I’ve already said plenty when I was younger. But thanks, Dad.”
• he smiled back
• you two would then sit in silence together, basking in each other’s presence
———
Vox
• so, uh, I’m going to have to completely skip the taking you in part with Vox because I genuinely cannot see him adopting a random child (unless he could gain something, but, like, you’re just a kid)
• so you’ll just get the aftermath of it (hope that’s okay)
• based on the way he handled Val’s tantrum, I think it’s safe to assume that he’s somewhat good with children
• but he’s a pretty busy guy
• he doesn’t have the time to take care of a random child, so he’d make sure to keep an eye on you on his cameras
• but despite that, your existence in the tower warrants his
• as you’re too chaotic whenever he isn’t around
• but only around the other expendable employees
• you’re relatively well-behaved when Velvette and Valentino are with you
• but he doesn’t exactly trust them to take care of you
• they aren’t exactly good with children
• so he tried doing video calls
• you will definitely grow up as an iPad kid
• he’d hear you talk about your mom during those calls
• he’d let you go on and on, but it’s not guaranteed that he’ll listen
• I don’t think he would ever tell you what happened to her (he doesn’t know, anyway)
• he won’t lie, he’d just work around your question
• skillfully
• like, extremely so
• even if you ask him directly, he still manages to dodge the question somehow
• I don’t know what else to say, he’s gonna be a pretty distant father—
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diejager · 4 months
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Can i make a request?
i thought of this yesterday what about y/n or the reader has been in 141 for 2 years now and one day 141 gets a new member konig but y\n or the reader is 26 and konig is 19 i feel like this has to be done😍😍
also konig: shy,sweet,tall,big,puppy like for the reader
reader: small,short,sassy,mommy🤭🤭
PLEASEEEE!!!!!
Young Cw: major canon divergence, bullying, intimidation, beating, protective reader, tell me if I missed any.
He hated attention, having people stare at him because he was tall —unnaturally so, towering over everyone despite his young age and timid and anti-social demeanour. He was grateful, really, after Laswell called in some favours to have him transferred from his platoon to a British Task Force as a trainee, someone on probation while he trained and learned how to integrate with the team. He worked well with them, the tall and muscular battering ram that opened up a path and shocked the enemy, working flawlessly beside to team, and yet, he couldn’t work up the energy or want to socialise with them, to open himself up and let them see the raw and softer part of his mind.
That, however, was the least of his problems, they were cordial - nice - with him, Soap and Gaz even went out of their way to include him in their banter, throwing jokes and good-minded laughs, Price acted as the protective figure of his team and extended it to him, Ghost - ever silent and glaring - didn’t mind looming over others and growling orders when someone overwhelmed him, and you were no stranger to threats and blackmail to get someone off his back. His problem, the biggest one, were the envious glares and insulting hisses older soldiers threw at him in hushed tones and occasionally glances when he found himself alone, either training or walking around.
Even in a place where he could let out all his aggression and pent up frustration, he was still victim to bullying, verbal rather than physical, no one would dare lay a hand on him when he was the youngest of the Task Force and under their protective eye. Despite the shielding from brutality, other men still found time and places to openly beat him down with demeaning and aggressive words, belittling his exploits, his awards and all his hard work to escape the hell of his little village (his Mutter was the only exception, he willingly went back on Holidays to see her).
“Look at that giant freak. Reckon he’d break if we put too much weight on him.”
“Bastard’s only here because he’s tall, that’s all he’s good at.”
“Aye, makes sense, never liked him. He might be a nepo baby, pop’s probably a powerful man.”
His Vater was a piece of shit that left him long before he was born, leaving his Mutter to fend for herself and rot away to feed and provide for him until he joined the army to care for her.
He didn’t want to give them more fuel, to retaliate meant more bullying, he learned that the hard way as a child. All König could do was take and take until they got bored, walking away from him to busy themselves with something else. That didn’t mean he didn’t get mad, frustrated or insulted, his hands curling into fists to hold itself back from pummelling them, they were his superiors, he’d be discharged or thrown out for hitting his superiors, especially since he was a foreigner and still new.
“Fuckin’ bastard is glaring.”
He was unknowingly glaring at them, he couldn’t help it, then he turned away, his gaze wandering to the floor before they’d escalate it. He heard one of them spit something out before he stomped towards König, shoulders and chest pushed out to seem bigger than they actually were in an attempt to intimidate him. Standing before him, he felt someone raise their fist, ready to strike him for simply glaring at them after months of being subjected to their intimidation. He was ready to stop them if needed, not a pushover or someone who’d take a beating quietly, eyes cued on the raised arm of an older man, but then he fell, moaning loudly as he fell to his knees.
“The fuck do you think you’re doing, huh?!” You appeared behind him, yelling out at the man you just kicked.
They were as surprised to see you, their faces draining of colour as the others scrambled to come up with an excuse. You snuck up on him as much as you did on them, using his height and size to your advantage to land your blow. You moved to stand before him, a shield to a man as tall as he was, protecting him with a vicious glare and damning words, and somehow, he found himself gripping onto the back of your jacket, your name printed on the back and the Task Force’s insignia on your sleeve.
“He was disrespecting us, Lieutenant!”
You didn’t hold back your disbelief, scoffing so loudly that other people had turned their attention to your group.
“Disrespecting? Do you take me for an idiot, Corporal? I’m no blind,” your words were silencing, sending them panicking for another reason to excuse their actions, something disbelieving or idiotic, “This isn’t the first time I’ve written you up to HR, Corporal Matt, Davis, Brown. You’ve done this many times with other operators, especially to König.”
“That’s because-”
“Save your fucking excuses and fuck off!” You nodded away, watching them scramble off.
Glee and smugness filled him, a disgusting feeling that he couldn’t help but enjoy, even as you huff and turn to look at him, head craned upwards to meet his eyes with soft adoration. You were always so warm and caring, as if you weren’t made to be the ruthless killer people made you out to be, but he’d seen you kill, the cold and calculated look in your eyes when you were deployed. You patted his arm, a smile gracing your lips as you reassured him that they wouldn’t bother him anymore.
”Time for dinner, yeah?”
He learned the next day that they were transferred to another base, seen packing up their bags with black eyes and bruises littering their bodies. Sparring, he heard from whispers, from one at to another, the word spread and he found his days quiet and anxiety-free.
“Danke, Leutnantin.”
“You know my name, König. I think you’ve earned the right to say it.”
Taglist: @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @bvxygriimes @distracteddragoness @konigsblog @im-making-an-effort @daisychainsinknots @0alk0msan @danielle143 @dont-mind-me-just-existing-sadly @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @notspiders @brokenpieces-72 @petwifed @aldis-nuts @randominstake @cassiecasluciluce @hayleybarnesx @shironasumi
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standfucker · 3 months
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Hello!! I've been thinking about an AFAB reader in the straw hat crew who dresses as a man. Short hair and masculine clothes that cover her up. She doesn't want people treating her differently or going easy on her in fights because of her gender hence her constant charade. Because of this the crew doesn't know that she is actually woman. I'd like to request drabbles of how Zoro, Sanji, And Luffy would react when finding out and where they would. Also, SFW please!
This was fun! ^^ Thanks for submitting a request! I tried to keep these a consistent length and failed. Each one ended up longer than the last... I'll have to keep trying harder to pace myself.
Discovering Your Secret - Monster Trio
CW: chest binding, canon-typical violence, injury (not described in detail), gun violence, battle trauma, nudity, awkwardness
Luffy
Group bathing was one bonding activity on the Sunny that you had to miss out on. Shyness wasn’t like you, but the guys chalked it up to a weird personality quirk and long since stopped questioning it. Some people liked their privacy, no big deal. Really, it was never a problem until Luffy barged into the bathroom one day while you were soaking, the door swinging open so hard it bounced back shut behind him.
You tried to shout that the bathroom was occupied, but it was drowned out by Luffy’s own yell of “GUM GUM CANNONBALL!” The next thing you knew, Luffy had somehow launched himself out of his clothes and into the tub, making a massive splash that took out half the water. It was only by sheer luck that he didn’t collide with you. 
Instantly you sank down low into the remaining water so only your head was above the surface. The clear water offered no protection, however, so you had to cover your chest and cross your legs. Embarrassment and panicky fear were rotten feelings to have when you had just gotten relaxed, and you found yourself getting angry on top of it all. This was such a stupid way to be found out, and it was only because your captain lacked any self-awareness.
Luffy came up with a laugh, then opened his eyes and blinked at you for a second. “Oh, hey!” he said, oblivious to your stress. “I didn’t know you were in here! Robin told me she just drew a bath, so I came in. Didn’t hear the rest of what she said–I guess she drew it for you! Shi shi shi.”
You stared at him, open-mouthed, too stunned to speak right away.
Luffy’s brows raised when you didn’t respond. “Oh, that’s right, you don’t like to bathe with others. Sorry!” “Luffy?” you tried, but he kept talking.
”Well, I’m here now, so we might as well share! We can wash each other’s backs.”
”Luffy.”
”What are you so shy for, anyway? You look fine to me.”
”Luffy!” you snapped.
”What?”
”Get out!”
”But I’m already wet!” he complained, and you mentally screamed at his stubbornness.
”Then I’ll get out! But you have to look away!” you barely managed to keep from yelling at him, trying not to lose your cool lest he get suspicious.
Luffy pursed his lips. “Fine, sheesh. I won’t look.”
He turned his head away. You hesitated, then quickly stood up and made to leave. You took one step onto the tub–and immediately slipped, thanks to the water Luffy splashed there a moment ago. A yelp left you as you fell fast.
”Y/N!” Right before you hit the tub, Luffy’s arms shot out and wrapped around you, pulling you safely back inside. “That was close!”
You froze in place, heart in your throat both from the fall and from your new position. Luffy’s arms were wrapped around your torso. He could clearly feel your chest against his rubbery arms. You gaped at him, wide-eyed in shock. Luffy smiled. Then he squeezed you again and frowned. Slowly, he looked down at your chest, then down even further.
”WHAT?!” Luffy yelled in shock, his eyes bugging out. “Y/N got attacked by Iva?! But when did you meet him?!”
You facepalmed hard.You’d heard about Ivankov through Luffy’s stories, so you had an idea of what he was talking about. But he missed the mark so hard it was astonishing.
Luffy quickly unwound his arms from around you and covered his face, stammering. “I’m sorry, Y/N! I had no idea!”  
Even though your own face was hot, you couldn’t help but start to laugh, though it was a bit nervous. As you carefully exited the tub, toweling off and pulling on a robe, you contemplated letting Luffy go on believing you were attacked by Iva. But then you would have to make up a story about meeting him, and lying to your bright-eyed captain seemed wrong. He meant well, after all.
Maybe this whole charade was unfair to him. Luffy couldn’t hold onto a secret to save his life anyway, so once he knew, the whole crew would know too. Still…though it would be a big change for you, it would be one less thing to worry about…
You draped your towel along the edge of the tub and perched on it, crossing your arms. “What did we learn about respecting people’s privacy?”
”I’m sorry,” Luffy said, peeking through his fingers before lowering his hands. “I didn’t know you had a reason…I won’t do it again! But when did you cross paths with Iva? During the two years I was away?”
”No, Luffy. I’ve never met Ivankov.” You took a deep breath, steeling yourself. “I’ve been a girl this whole time. I was just pretending to be male.”
”Whaaat!? Really?” Luffy’s eyes bugged out at you again. “But why?”
You did your best to explain your reasons. Luffy only seemed to grow more confused as you went on, crossing his arms and tilting his head.
”I don’t get it. Nami and Robin are strong,” he said.
“Never said they weren’t,” you replied patiently. “But Nami and Robin get underestimated constantly. Maybe they’re used to it, but I can’t stomach the idea. It’s insulting.”
“Hmm…” Luffy thought for a second. “Does this mean we can’t wrestle anymore?”
“Of course we can! The whole point is that I don’t want you to treat me differently!”
“Oh… Oh! I see!” Luffy said, his eyes lighting up with realization. “Okay then! I’ll whoop your butt like normal!”
A warm feeling filled your chest, and you smiled. Now he was catching on, and he didn’t seem to mind. The relief was almost dizzying.
You asked Luffy to try to keep it a secret for now.
He lasted about three weeks, until he asked you one day, point-blank in front of the others: “Hey, Y/N? Where do your boobs go when you get dressed?”
Zoro
“Behind you!”
Zoro’s shout made you whirl around, raising your weapon, but your opponent was already on the downswing. Their sword cut your chest open from clavicle to rib. Pain sizzled out from the gash, hot and burning, but in addition to that, you could feel that your binder was damaged, freeing your breasts. You grit your teeth through the pain and managed to strike your foe down. Then you hunched over yourself, arms crossed over your chest, quivering. The warm blood on your arms told you this one might be serious, but despite the wound, all that was on your mind was getting found out.
Zoro rushed to your side, mowing down foes as he went until he was there. “Did they get you? Let me see.” But you shook your head. “Let me see!” he insisted, an edge of panic to his voice as blood dripped onto the ground below you.
You looked up at him with visible fear, which he misunderstood. “You’re going to be okay, but you have got to let me see.”
Shaking, you lowered your arms, revealing your wound and your secret all at once.
Zoro’s eyes widened, momentarily speechless. Then he snapped out of it, hurriedly taking off his shirt and wrapping it around your torso. He picked you up, one arm supporting your bottom while the other tucked you against his chest to hide your front. You pressed your face into his shoulder, discomposed from the shock of the injury and from the sudden reveal.
What would he think of you now? All the times you arm wrestled, all the times you sparred, all the drinking contests and shared conversations and shared fights–would you never experience them again? You kept asking yourself those questions as Zoro took you out of the slowing battle.
Chopper was shocked, but promised to keep your secret. However, after he found out that you’d been binding your chest with bandages almost 24-7, he scolded you harshly, going on about how you could permanently damage your body.
At your request, Zoro’s the only one Chopper let visit you in the ship’s infirmary. For a while, Zoro didn’t say anything, just stared at your bandaged chest with an unreadable expression.
“I wanted you to respect me,” you said, breaking the silence. He didn’t respond. “I could never be your equal otherwise. Please understand.”
Zoro looked down at you and gave a heavy sigh, eyes distant for a moment. “...You remind me of someone I used to know.” He sat on the edge of your bed, some softness to his gaze now. “I get it. I get why you hid this. But you’re an idiot.”
”I know. I let myself get hurt.”
”No, dummy. Because you treated the crew like we wouldn’t understand. You didn’t trust us. It makes sense in the beginning, but after all these years?” He frowned at you, and you realize that deep down, he was hurt.
”I didn’t want anything to change between us.” You looked away, ashamed. “Between you and me.”
”It doesn’t have to.”
”You don’t like to fight women.”
Zoro grimaced at the accusation, knowing you’re right. The infirmary was quiet for a minute.
”I’m sorry,” Zoro finally said. “I’ll…I’ll do better. Nothing has to change.” He paused, and offered up a smirk. “After all, I go easy on you anyways.”
You feel yourself tear up at his acceptance, and grinned back at him. “Once I heal up, I’ll make you regret that.” You paused, face falling. “You won’t tell anyone, right? I don’t want Sanji to…you know.”
“Yeah.” Zoro made a face at the cook’s name. ”It’ll stay between the three of us,” he promised. “I still think you should tell them, but it’s not my secret to share.”
”Maybe in time. I’ll have to think about it,” you said, and he nodded.
Zoro held out his hand. You clasped it in a big swing, grimacing when it made your wound sting, and squeezed as tightly as you could.
“You don’t have to prove anything to me,” Zoro said, squeezing back. “Okay? We’re still buds.”
”Okay.” Again, you felt the tears threatening to spill.
”But if you cry, I’ll make fun of you.”
”Shut up!”
Once Zoro realizes you were hindered by the binder for all of your matches against him, he got fired up. All the times he won, you had a handicap–it wasn’t a fair match, he decided. However, there wasn’t really a place on the ship where you could take it off in front of others, so he was forced to remain undecided on the topic of which one of you is stronger.
It wasn’t until you revealed your secret to the others that you and Zoro finally got to have a proper, no-holds-barred sparring session. True to his word, he didn’t hold back, too battle-hungry to care if he touched your chest when you wrestled or exchanged blows. (Sanji snarled in the background, but neither of you were paying him any attention.)
As it turned out, when you let your aching ribs heal and could breathe properly, you were far better than you were before. You ended up almost defeating the swordsman, and he was so proud of you that he threw an arm around your shoulders and noogied your head until you were certain he left track marks in your skull. “That’s my girl!”
Sanji
The impact of your sword against your opponent’s knocked the weapons out of the both of your hands. Undeterred, you dashed forward to take them on barehanded, confident in your unarmed strength. Right as you reached them, they drew a hidden flintlock from their back belt, and touched the muzzle to your forehead.
You froze. The battlefield seemed to fade away, nothing solid or corporeal except for the gun to your head. You couldn’t hear anything but the blood rushing in your ears, feel anything but the cold steel pressed to your skull. Everything rushed through your head in one synaptic burst, a thousand million thoughts of how soon, how final this was. All the years of adventure, ending here. One slip-up. You were going to die.
You couldn’t even feel regret. Just the sensation of your heart beating as if it was in every blood vessel. You didn’t hear the call of your name, nor the shouted “Diable Jambe!”
In the time it took for your opponent to squeeze his trigger finger, Sanji appeared seemingly out of nowhere and kicked the guy’s hand so hard you saw it break. The gun fired into the ground a few feet away from you, and with another burning kick, Sanji knocked him out.
You were in shock, standing there unharmed, but useless. Sanji took notice, calling for you again. When you didn’t respond, he rushed to you and grabbed your shoulders, shaking you hard. “Get it together! We still need you!”
Suddenly the sound, the sensation, everything came rushing back, hitting you all at once. You blinked, glanced at the surrounding battle, then at Sanji’s tense expression.
“Y/N!”
“I’m okay!” you said. “T-Thanks. I’m okay.” With that, you rushed for your fallen sword, ready to rejoin the battle.
It wasn’t your first brush with death, but this one rattled you worse than the others. After the battle you dwelled on it constantly, thinking back to that moment and breaking out into a cold sweat even though you’d just cleaned up. You couldn’t think about anything else, focus on anything going on around you. You skipped dinner, stomach too upset to eat, and were barely able to sleep despite your exhaustion from the day’s battle. You skipped breakfast the following day, and only around lunchtime did your mind seem to catch up to your body. You watched Luffy and the crew mess around, playing and laughing and arguing, and suddenly you realized that you almost lost this forever. Immediately, the urge to cry overtook you with tremendous force. You hurried through the ship’s interior, shoved yourself into a corner, and sobbed into your hands.
Dead. Oh god, you were almost dead. How was it that easy? All the strength you had worked so hard to build, meaningless. How could you have been so overconfident? How could you have let yourself lose so easily? Had Sanji not been there, you would have been gone. Gone.
The tears ran hot down your cheeks, and you bit your tongue to keep from being loud. It could have gone so much worse. Sanji was dependable, but tended to keep his eye on the girls during fights. He only saved you because you were close by. It was sheer luck that he saved you. Only luck.
“Y/N!”
Sanji’s call of your name made you go quiet. You resisted the urge to sniffle, even as your nose ran. If he found you…it wouldn’t be the end of the world, but you’d rather not be caught crying. You spent years building the image of the stoic, masculine fighter, and would prefer to keep up that appearance. Sanji called you again, closer this time, and you cleared your throat.
“Yeah?” you called out.
“Lunch is ready, so hurry on down,” he announced from the doorway, just out of your vision.
It took you a minute to gather yourself, but after washing your face and regulating your breathing, you were ready to rejoin the group once more.
In the weeks following, you dealt with your shock and processed it the best that you could. Eventually you started sleeping better again, your appetite returned, and life seemed to go on as normal…except for one thing: Sanji. He started acting strangely when he was nearby.
It started off small. He was far more pleasant around you than he normally was. Not that you and Sanji held animosity toward each other, but usually he treated you like another male: friendly enough if you weren’t Zoro, but not to this degree. He never really brightened up at the sight of you before. Nor did he ask for your opinion in his upcoming meal plan for the week. At first you chalked it up to him noticing your earlier distress somehow, but after you got better, he kept on acting saccharine.
One day, he brought you a drink. Not served you at the table with everyone else, but went out of his way to bring it to where you were sunbathing on the deck. You could only stare at him until he awkwardly left it by your side, stammered something about the heat, and then left.
Incidents like that kept happening, usually out of sight of the other crewmates, but not always. The others started picking up on it too. At one point, Sanji brought Robin, Nami, and Chopper slices of cake–and then brought you a plate as well. That time, everyone’s eyes were on him, but Sanji pretended like nothing was off.
When he chirped “Hi, Y/N-chan,” to you as he passed by you in the hall, you had enough. You grabbed him and shoved him against the wall, hard. He immediately knew he messed up, but despite your fingers fisted in his collar and your murderous expression, he only flushed red.
“What are you doing?” you hissed.
“I–I’m–” Sanji stammered. Blood started to run from one of his nostrils.
“Why are you acting like this?” you demanded. “Being all sappy and disgusting to me. Who do you think I am?”
“I–I’m sorry,” Sanji tried. You grit your teeth, beginning to fear the worst.
“Did you lose all respect for me when you saved my life?” you asked bluntly.
“Of course not! I think highly of you.”
“Too much so, don’t you think?” you had to struggle not to shout. “Is this because you heard me crying last month?”
Sanji shut his mouth, glancing aside and giving away the answer. He nodded.
“Am I weak to you or something?”
“No, that’s not it–” he tried, but you pulled him away from the wall and slammed him back into it.
“I don’t understand! You’re too soft with me. Why are you treating me so nicely?”
“Because you’re a woman, and women deserve the best.” He said it unflinchingly and with conviction, looking right back into your eyes.
The answer was obvious, but a part of you still hoped it was something else, hoped that because he didn’t go overboard with his affections that he didn’t know. Your grip on his collar weakened and gave away along with your hopes, hands hanging limply at your sides.
“When did you find out?” you asked quietly. “Or should I say, how?”
“I saw you crying.” Sanji pulled out a handkerchief, wiping his nose.
“So?”
“You may look and act like a man…but a woman’s tears leave no room for doubts.”
You stared at him in disbelief. Unfair. That’s what this was. Just unfair. Because after all those years living as a male, you got found out because of Sanji’s freakish sixth sense for women. Your sigh was heavy, and you had to rest your head in your hand for a moment.
“Okay, well, we need to set some things straight. You can’t keep slipping up around me, or the others will find out. They already suspect something’s up.”
“I'm trying!” Sanji retorted. “I knew you were hiding it for some reason, so I tried to keep myself in check! Do you know how hard it’s been?”
“How hard it’s been?” You wanted to punch him. “You have no idea what I go through every day just to keep up appearances! Just to earn the regard I deserve! Why couldn't you respect me as a man?”
“I don't respect men.”
“Ugh!” You punched the wall by his head instead. Sanji didn’t flinch. “You have to take me seriously.”
“I am!”
“We can’t keep going like this.” You bit your lip in frustration, trying to think of a solution. Maybe you could use his weird complex around women to your advantage, if he would just stop giving it away. “Okay, listen. Sanji. If you really want to do me a favor, the best thing you can do is help me keep my secret. That means whenever you have the urge to treat me like a girl, you nip it in the bud. Can you do that?”
“I…I’ll try.” Sanji went to take your hand, but you yanked it away.
“This is exactly what I’m talking about! You can’t be so familiar.”
“I’m sorry. It’s hard! I–I want to treat you right. I want to be close to you.”
“I want to be close to you to,” you admitted, surprising yourself. “But I. I’d… I’d rather hold onto my secret.”
He looked hurt, which sent a cold pang of guilt into your stomach. Reaching out, you patted his shoulder. “I’m depending on you, do you understand?”
Sanji took in your expression–serious, worried, uncertain–and nodded. The hand that reached for yours instead went over his heart. “I promise,” he said, “I will do everything I can to help keep your secret.”
The talk with Sanji helped massively, fixing his odd behavior around you for the most part. There was one thing he couldn’t give up, and that was giving you a nickname. He called you something in French–“mon petit chou,” he would say–but as it was foreign, you figured it was safe to use around the crew, and let it slide.
It was only a few months later that you learned Robin was fluent in French.
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draiys · 3 months
Text
cardig☆n
you drew stars around my scars
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but now i'm bleeding...
luke castellan x child of athena!fem!reader
genre fluff / angst
warnings spoilers ig, but i kinda went off canon bc i haven't read it in a while (and bc i couldnt bring myself to write it) im sryyy, crying, mentions of being burned (but its not literal), my attempt at angst, kissing, mentions of not being able to breathe (but theres no like choking or anything), open-ended(-ish?) ending
wc 1k
a/n requested here ! i hope u like it :')
my requests are open !
☆☆☆
You used to think you knew everything. 
Sure, it sounds a little conceited, but it’s who you’ve been told you are.
Y/N has a plan. Y/N will know what to do. She always does.
No one ever thought to tell you that it was okay if you weren’t always exactly sure of everything.
And so, you’d risen to it. Always knowing, expecting, deciding. Everything.
But now, as Luke stands in the sand in front of you, rain washing into his curls, you’re not sure you’ve ever known anything.
“They don’t care about us.” He hisses. “Don’t you see that?”
His boot presses forward as he steps closer to you, his calloused hand reaching towards your cheek.
You pause for a moment, as if you’ll let him touch you, and you almost do, but step back quickly after as if his hand is a fire you’ve only just remembered will burn skin instead of a beautiful, twisting, orange arc.
“Y/N,” he whispers, but you’ve stepped back into another place, another time. A memory.
Of the only other time you’ve felt like you don’t know anything, calloused hands that reach for you, and a raspy voice whispering your name.
Luke.
You’re curled into the wall against your bunk, knees pulled up into your chest, tears tracing down your face.
And he’s smiling softly, his hand held out. 
“That is your name, right?”
At your nod, his smile widens.
You decide you like his smile, the way it pushes up his eyes into crescents, and so you take his hand.
He gently tugs you up and out of bed.
“I know it’s hard, but I promise it will be okay.”
You’ve heard that about a thousand times since you’ve arrived at camp, but you think this is the only time you’ve heard it that you’ve believed it even a little.
His fingers rub against your palm, and his hand is warm, and you look into his eyes. They’re warm and glowy and comforting, and you think maybe you’ll manage being in this camp, if he’s here.
Now, his eyes are the coldest you’ve ever seen, and a frown pulls the corners of his mouth down. 
“I’m sorry,” you whisper, and you realize you’ve never felt scared of Luke until now.
He shakes his head slightly, and it’s Luke, shaking his head, grinning as Athena’s owl glows above your head. 
“I should’ve known you were too smart for us.”
You scoff, going to push at his shoulder, but he grabs your waist and you fall into his hug. You inhale, his cologne winding around you, and he lowers his head to whisper into your ear.
“I’m gonna miss you.”
You pause, arms moving tentatively to hug him back, chin pushing further into his shoulder.
A wave of emotion hits the inside of your gut, pulling your breath tight.
“Luke,” you breathe, and he pulls his head back to look at you. You can’t say anything, but he understands what you mean by his name.
I’ll miss you more. Please don’t leave me. I need you.
“It’s okay,” he promises, and he tucks your hair behind your ear, wiping a tear from your under eye, and you realize you’re crying.
He leans forward, and his gaze drifts to your lips, and yours drift to his, and suddenly they’ve connected, you’re not sure when that happened, but you pull him impossibly closer. You ignore the screams of the campers around you as you realize you’re kissing him. Luke, who took you and put you behind his back on the first day of camp, who’s listened to all your worries and sobs and laughs for a month that seems like years.
And you finally pull away, the need for oxygen coming up in your lungs, squeezing them because you can’t breathe, can’t think, you don’t know anything, who is he?
Luke frowns harshly, angrily, and you almost trip backwards trying to get away from him.
“I’m sorry,” you say again. But you’re not sure if you’re saying it to him or to yourself. You don’t know who he is anymore. Because this surely can’t be him, not Luke who kissed you and held you while you cried, who taught you to use a sword, patiently steadying your grip, who was the only person that told you it was okay if you didn’t have a plan.
“Luke,” you whisper, and he creeps closer, and you forget about the fire, and you let his lips burn into you.
☆☆☆
It’s been a month since Luke left, and you’ve never felt emptier, even before you met him. You’d been holding tightly onto the pieces of your heart, until he’d come and told you he would keep them safe for you. But now he’s left with all of them, and you’re even emptier than you were before. 
You’re a wreck, skipping meals and staying in bed instead of going to trainings.
You stare out the cabin window, at the starry night you and Luke used to sneak out to go lie underneath together.
There’s a knock at the door, and you stay unmoving, glancing at the clock. Whoever’s got a question for an Athena kid at 2am can come back in the morning. But then there’s a sound that makes you freeze. A short knock, and then a louder, longer, one. Like a heartbeat. Bu-bum. Bu-bum. Your special knock, with him.
You’re not sure what compels you to get out of bed, pulling your sheets aside lazily, because it must be the worst idea you’ve had in a while. But you twist open the door, heart thumping like the knock as your breath catches over your throat.
The porch light shines down over the dark figure, face hard to see, but of course you’d recognize him anywhere.
“Luke,” you whisper.
All the coldness that lingered in his eyes is gone now, the familiar warmth taking them over again.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, his voice shaking. “I’m so sorry,” he says again, and you wonder if maybe the fire has gone out, and you pull him into a tight hug as he burns you.
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islandofsages · 4 months
Note
hey, I could ask the royal boys (Leona, Kalim and Malleus) with the male reader who is already the king of his country, like the boys thought he was a prince like them, but then on any given day he lets out a complaint how difficult it is to govern the kingdom and study for exams at the same time, sometimes he just wanted to be the prince and not the king.
characters: leona, kalim and malleus x king!male reader
tags: platonic, canon compliant, fluff, imagines + scenario format
warnings: a little bit of negativity towards reader in leona's part, a bit of swearing in kalim's
author's notes: loving all the male reader requests rn. i think i strayed a bit from the prompt but i hope you like it anyway <3
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Leona Kingscholar
Though being a prince himself, he’s not as “diplomatic” with the other princes at that school - except for you probably. No don’t ask him what happened, he’s ready to accept it as it is
At least because of your (assumed) status, he finds it easier to communicate with you; at least you’re not one of the top five most powerful mages in the world or the most optimistic person in Twisted Wonderland
Hangouts with him still consist more of silent chilling though; both of you just need to get away from it all for a while
He doesn’t question the days that you’re gone - sometimes people just end up needing you to do this and that. He tries not to dwell on it too much, lest his inferiority complex gets the best of him
Until one day, you come back after one day of absence, which is normal enough until-
“*sigh* I swear, being king is less appealing as my retainers make it sound, especially since I also have to go to school all the while.”
I’m sorry, being what now?
He knew you were royalty, that much he got from everyone whispering about you back when you enrolled and since you made little mention of your background, he just assumed you were a prince like him
You let out a tired chuckle then and comment on how you forgot that you never told him you’re an actual king of a nation
He has mixed feelings over this - he thought he finally met someone a little bit like him, yet you’re just another one of them and you never bothered telling him who you are?
But don’t worry, he gets over his feelings of betrayal after a while; it’s not like the reveal changed who you are as a person. You’re still the same guy who he’s been hanging out with and he knows his brain is trying to defend itself
You apologize for not telling him sooner and despite your complaints, you try not to sound ungrateful, especially considering his issues
At some point, even Leona himself starts to forget about that fact
It doesn’t matter if you carry a whole nation on your shoulders because - and he will never say this out loud - he knows you’re capable and if you start to crumble, he’ll be there for you.
Kalim Al-Asim
Though he’s not one to really care about someone’s social status, he’s happy to have more royal friends
Doesn’t stop him from spoiling you. Haven’t you heard? Any friends of Kalim are also friends of his many, many fortunes
He invites you over to Scarabia for parties every so often and either you are surrounded by people or everyone leaves you alone out of intimidation
But hey, if the latter happens, Kalim is more than happy to help you make some friends (unless you’re uncomfortable with it of course but he’ll still try to help)
One time, at one of his many parties, you two were simply laughing over something and it reminded you of something-
“That makes me think of the time this creature took a shit on my throne back at home - it took a few days for the stench to fade!”
Oh, of course, your throne! Everyone totally has a literal throne back home! Until Kalim realizes that is, in fact, untrue
As if he wasn’t already excited at the prospect of a new friend, he gets more excited at the fact that you have your own throne and is, he concludes, a monarch
You brush him off, light pink decorating your cheeks, saying that it’s not really that special - and you mean it
You tell him of the experience and you couldn’t help slip in a few complaints; it isn’t easy to juggle both school and royal responsibilities at the same time
He only listens in and tries his best to understand; he is no king, and though he is a housewarden and a prince, your struggles differ from his by a long mile
From that day on, he makes sure to check in on you and if you’re feeling less than, he’ll drop everything and do anything to relieve you of your stress
When he drops by your nation and your palace, he brings in a whole parade. It’s so Kalim that you can only laugh
You knew that story about a creature shitting on your throne was gonna be a good story at parties.
Malleus Draconia
Your presence is an absolute delight to him; it didn’t occur to him to ask what kind of royalty you are but it didn’t matter either way
He finds himself more comfortable talking about his heritage around you, knowing that you can somewhat relate to being of nobility
If you’re not part of his club, sometimes you tag along on his gargoyle crusades for the hell of it - seeing him so passionate about something brings a smile to your face
On one of your many escapades, he points out a gargoyle and begins to ramble about its features
Hearing it suddenly makes you remember-
“Ah gosh, I just remembered I should be back home right now, some of my people will be coming over to construct some gargoyles around my castle.”
He doesn’t question it at first but then the phrase “my people” registered in his mind. Wait, what do you mean your people?
You start to apologize for not telling him and also the fact that you have to leave that very moment
After you came back after the whole ordeal, you sit him down somewhere and tell him about your position
As mentioned, it doesn’t matter to him what responsibilities you have, as long as you can be his friend
You breathe out a sigh of relief and invite him to continue where you two left off last time
Nothing changes much between you two, except for the fact that you share more of your kingly experiences
He definitely drops by your place at least once - he could never miss out a chance on seeing some new gargoyles
And as he looks on at those beautiful waterspouts, you can’t help but be grateful that they can serve as a source of happiness for someone too.
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Text
Difference of Opinions (Part 1)
Fandom: Spider-Man, Spider-Verse, Across the Spider-Verse, Miguel O'Hara, f!Reader Summary: You went against the man you loved and helped Miles escape. Now you must face Miguel's wrath. Word Count: 1821 TW: Angst, Betrayal, Anger, Glitching, Left for Dead, Miguel has a temper Notes: I told myself I wasn't going to get sucked into writing for this movie, but this idea wouldn't stop nagging at my brain so here you go!
Prequel, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Series Masterlist
*Spoilers for Across the Spider-Verse*
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As you watched Miles disappear in a flash of the Go Home machine, you couldn’t help but smile. For a moment, you had been afraid that he wasn’t going to make it. That despite everything you, Hobie, and Margo had done to help him, Miguel was going to stop him before he could escape. But he got to go home to try and save his father. He had a chance.
However, the smile slowly faded from your face as Miguel roared and ripped the arm off of the Go Home machine. You had been so focused on getting Miles off of Earth-928 that you hadn’t considered what happened afterwards. This was going to be bad.
The room had filled with other Spider-people who had all been involved in the chase for Miles and they all just stared at Miguel. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Margo’s avatar disappear and you sighed in relief. At least she would escape Miguel’s fury. 
Right now, his focus had turned towards Gwen. As they began yelling back and forth at one another and Miguel dragged her into the Go Home machine, you started to back out of the room as inconspicuously as possible. While part of you wanted to run to Gwen’s aid, she was being sent back to her own universe. It was heartbreaking to watch– especially knowing what was going to happen to her father when she returned –however, she was getting off easy considering her part in getting Miles involved in the Spider-Society in the first place. Things could have been a lot worse for her. As they would probably be for you if you didn’t let Miguel cool down for a while before confronting him.
You had just about made it to the door when you heard a snarl behind you. “And where do you think you’re going?”
Red webs coiled around your arms and legs pinning them to your body and making you fall to the floor. Before you could try to squirm your way out, Miguel yanked hard and you flew backwards into him. He caught your chin with one large hand, his nails sharpening into claws and digging painfully into your skin as he held you off the ground. 
His red eyes flashed dangerously as he roared in your face, “Did you think I wouldn’t see you trying to slink away? You helped him escape! You! Of the hundreds of us in the Spider-Society, you were the last one I ever imagined turning against me.”
“I haven’t turned against you, Miguel. You know I love you too much to ever do that.” With your face still pinned in his grasp, you tried your best to keep your expression calm and non-confrontational. You knew how he got when he was like this and it was better to not get him even more agitated. However, your voice remained firm and unwavering. “But right now, you’re letting your past cloud your judgment and you’re not thinking clearly. I was just trying to–”
“He’s trying to alter a second canon event! We still haven’t dealt with what he did in Mumbattan and you just let him get away to do it again!” He bared his sharp teeth at you as he growled deep in his throat. In all your years together as friends or as lovers, you had never once feared Miguel would hurt you…. until this moment. All reason seemed to have left him and all you saw when you looked at his face was fury and pain. There was no trace of the man you loved before you.
Trying to keep the quiver out of your voice, you calmly said, “You said it yourself. Miles is an anomaly. He was never supposed to be one of us so who’s to say he has to uphold the canon events? From what I can tell, the Peter Parker of that world already lost his captain before he died. So maybe Miles has a chance none of us ever got. Maybe he doesn’t have to bear this loss like the rest of us. Maybe he can change his fate.”
“‘Maybe! Maybe! Maybe’! You risked the lives of an entire universe on maybe!” Miguel’s grip on your face tightened and you mewled slightly as his claws broke skin. “Whether or not he was supposed to be Spider-Man, he is now. And that means he must follow the canon. If he was different than the rest of us, he wouldn’t have already lost his uncle.”
“Or may– possibly becoming the Prowler is what got that Aaron Davis killed, not because he was Miles’s uncle.” You tried to reach up to stroke Miguel’s cheek, to calm some of his anger, but your hands were still pinned to your side by his webs. “Miguel, don’t do this. I’m begging you. Please, let Miles try. Trust that I know what I’m doing.”
Slowly, Miguel’s fury faded from his face until there was nothing left but pain. Pain that you knew you had caused. He lowered you to the floor and loosened his grip on your face though he didn’t release you. Then, as he stared deeply into your eyes, he spoke in an agonized whisper. “I did trust you. I would have gone to the ends of the multiverse and beyond for you. I gave you my heart even after I swore never to open myself up to anyone again but you turned your back on me the first chance you had.”
Tears sprung to your eyes and you squirmed against the webs, desperate to touch him. To hold him and make him feel that your love for him never wavered. “You know that’s not true. I’ve stood by your side from the very beginning. I’ve loved you and helped you build this Society so we could uphold the canon across hundreds of universes. But I just… I just couldn’t stand by this time and not at least give Miles a chance to try and save someone he loves. I’m sorry.”
For just a moment, you thought you saw a glimpse of compassion or love in his gaze but it was quickly replaced by bitter cold indifference. “I’m not.”
His claws slashed through his webbing, freeing your limbs. But before you could move, Miguel grabbed your arm, ripped your portal watch from your wrist, and hurled it against the wall where it shattered into pieces. Still holding your arm, he tossed you across the room. You crashed into the floor and slid another dozen feet or so on your side. And just as you slowed to a stop, you glitched as this unfamiliar universe attacked your cells. 
You felt like your body was simultaneously being compressed and stretched in a hundred directions at once. When the glitch ended, you let out a small whimper but the sound didn’t cull Miguel’s rage any. Even as you lay in a heap on the ground, he tossed a disk in your direction and suddenly a red transparent field surrounded you. 
Unable to believe he was really doing this to you, you called out to him but he ignored your plea. Instead, he turned his back on you and growled, “Jess, Ben, come with me. And somebody catch Spot.”
Jess glanced at his retreating form then back to where you were now confined. “Miguel. You can’t just leave her like this. Without a watch–”
“She made her bed, now she can die in it,” he snapped without turning around. He simply opened a portal and said, “Let’s go.”
Ben fell in behind him, but Jess hesitated, her hand reaching out towards you. But you shook your head. Miguel had judged you and once that happened, no one could change his mind. Jess had too much to lose by trying to help you and despite hating to see her leaving to track Miles down, you knew she was just as trapped now as you were. So, reluctantly, she turned and followed Miguel and Ben into the portal.
Now alone, you pulled your knees up to your chest and buried your face in them. You didn’t regret helping Miles, but you never imagined this would be the consequence. Miguel had a right to feel betrayed yet the fact he would go this far– that he was alright with you slowly glitching out of existence – broke your heart. Miguel had never been a saint but you never imagined he could do this. Not to you. How could his love sour so quickly that he was willing to let you die rather than try to understand why you did what you did? 
No. I won’t accept that.
Miguel was just not thinking clearly after everything that had happened today. Deep down, he still loved you. He had to. Just as you still loved him despite him leaving you to die in this cage. If you could only show him that you were right and Miles was different, then maybe Miguel could forgive you for going against him. And maybe there was still hope for the two of you. Or maybe he would still want you dead. 
Wow, Miguel was right and you did rely heavily on “maybe”.
However, there was just something about this situation that made you believe in those maybes. For years you had protected the multiverse by Miguel’s side and you had never questioned his decisions or a canon event. But something in your gut– in your spider-sense –was telling you this time was different. That Miles really could break from the canon without the same consequences as the others. But you would never know unless you found a way out of this cage!
Suddenly, you remembered how Miles managed to escape the same sort of prison an hour before. You might not have his Venom Blast powers but maybe Miguel presented you with your own way to escape. Spreading your arms and legs out as far as you could, you pressed yourself against the force field so you covered as much area as you possibly could. Then you waited.
About four minutes later, it happened. You glitched again but this time, you were ready for it. Using all the strength you could muster, you fought against the glitch and kept yourself pressed against the field. As your body began to flicker and change, so did the force field. When things finally corrected themselves and you were left moaning on the floor, you opened your eyes to see what was once your cage had been transformed into a pile of random junk from across the multiverse.  
Giving it a slight push, the pile collapsed and you walked out of the remains of your prison. You were free. Now, you just had to find a way off of Earth-928 and back into the multiverse to find Miles before Miguel did. And you thought you had an idea about where to start….
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Thank you for reading, liking, commenting, and/or rebloging! I am planning a prequel to this fic showing how Miguel and Reader met and I may also do a sequel fic to this one. If you are interested, please let me know and I'll add you to the tag list! Thanks!
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lincolndjarin · 6 months
Text
Best Kept Secret
chapter twenty six : crucifixion
ao3 link ✿ series masterlist ✩ main masterlist ✧
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pairing : bodyguard!Din Djarin x afab!princess!reader
rating : 18+ mdni
word count : 12.7k
summary : judgement day.
warnings: major character death, above canon typical violence, very brief references to suicide, torture, body horror (briefly), feelings of despair, blood, wounds, general kodo grossness, vomit (reader vomits several times, it is never described in detail), language, angst, brief smut, pregnancy, death, reader is not doing well in this like she's at a breaking point, i may have missed some so feel free to let me know.
a/n: please read the warnings on this chap! it's the most serious of the bks updates, definitely a bit more intense than the rest. gonna work on getting 27 out within the next few day. i've been terrified of releasing this chapter since i started writing it so once i post this i'm going to dig a hole and sit in it and hide for a while lmao.
i changed my editing style so if there's spelling errors lmk!! apologies in advance!!
“My room is too big.” 
He bursts into genuine peals of laughter and you gently smack his arm.
“Don’t laugh, it’s a serious issue! My room is enormous.” You’re giggling along with him now, it’s the hardest you’ve ever heard him laugh. You both just laugh for a few minutes, as if each other's company is the most amusing thing in the world. 
Once your giggles fizzle out you wait another moment before breaking the silence. 
“Where did you grow up?” You can’t see him but you can sense where he sits in the darkness, you crawl forward so you’re sitting between his legs, your own legs wrap around his waist. “I’m just curious.” 
“Aq Vetina.” You can’t recall anything about the planet. You aren’t even sure you’ve heard of it. 
“Do you remember your parents well? You don’t talk about them very much.” You put your hands on his shoulders, ever so slowly moving them up to his neck until you’re cupping his face. 
“I’ll never forget them.” He whispers. 
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. We can’t change the past.” You rub your nose against his, bumping them together as you hum and nod. “My mother loved ships. We didn’t travel, we never had a reason to, but she would take me outside and we’d watch ships fly past. I could never comprehend how she knew the name for all of them, it blew my mind.” You wrap your arms around his neck, staying silent in hopes that he’ll continue, he so rarely speaks so much. “My father worked a lot but he always made time for us, he was always home in time to say goodnight to me. He was always around when I needed him, he always provided for us. On his day off he’d spend the whole day cooking, I’d sit on the kitchen counter and tell him what my mother and I had done that week. When she’d come home we’d all eat dinner together.” 
“You sound like you were a happy child.” You can’t help but smile. 
“I never had reason to be otherwise.” He says it so matter of factly that you don’t doubt it for a second. He was loved. It only makes you smile wider.         
“What were you like, as a child?”
“Well behaved.” You immediately begin laughing once more. 
“I find that hard to believe.”
“Believe it. My mother homeschooled me, she always made sure I had manners. I wasn’t particularly athletic or talkative so I didn’t play with other kids a lot. It was just me and mama.” He sounds far away, it makes you want to hold him close and never let him go.
“So what did you do all day?” Your tone has softened significantly. 
“I would sew.” 
“Be serious.” He’s the one who laughs now at the disbelief in your voice.
“I am! I would sit with my mother after my lessons and we’d sew.” His fingertips dance along the back of your neck as he reminisces.��
“What kinds of things?” You don’t tease. When you really think about it you suppose such a hobby is fitting for him. A task that requires precision and care. 
“I would help her make clothes and blankets that she would sell most days. On the weekends she’d let me do whatever I wanted so I would practice my embroidery.” 
“My heart is actually about to explode out of my chest, you’re so cute.” You put on a mocking tone but the thought of such a thing really does make your heart clench. “Little Din Djarin stitching his name into his clothes.”
“You’re a cruel woman.” He leans forward, knocking his forehead against yours, almost as if he were reprimanding you. 
“What sorts of things would you embroider?” Your tone goes back to genuine, you could listen to him talk about himself for days and you’d never get bored. 
“Whatever my mother wanted. I would ask her what I should do and then I’d stitch it onto her blanket or the hem of her skirt. Mostly flowers, she loved daisies.” You’re pretty sure one of your ovaries literally popped at the thought of a little boy with dark curls and big brown eyes sitting beside his mother and embroidering a daisy onto her skirt. Your heart flutters a bit as you think of the necklace he got you. The silver outline of a flower you now realize is a daisy. “If he was ever gone for more than one night for work my father would bring her daisies, one for each day he was away.”
“Do you still know how?”
“I used to fix Grogu’s clothes when he ripped them but I haven’t done much else since I was a boy. He says it with finality but you carry on, not wanting him to stop talking. 
“What were their names? Your parents?”
“Clara and Arin Djarin.”  
“Those are pretty names.”
“What was it like for you? You said you had seven siblings right?”
“Eight actually.” You think of them now. There were eight of you and your parents' love for all of you combined wasn’t even a tenth of how much Din’s parents loved him. 
“Do you like having a big family?” He lifts you off of his lap, laying you back down as he crawls on top of you, laying against your chest. 
“I love it. I miss my siblings everyday, do you think we’ll be able to visit them someday?”
“If it’s safe to, of course we will.” He tilts his head, if you weren’t in darkness he’d be looking at you. 
“I wish they had visited here. They would have loved you.”
“You think?”
“Are you kidding me? The younger ones would adore you.” You tangle your finger in his hair, scratching his scalp. “Kids just naturally like you.” 
“They just haven’t learned to fear me.” You frown when he says it like a fact.
“I think it’s more than that.”
“Yeah?” The hopeful tilt to his voice has you leaning down to press a kiss into his hair. 
“Kids are intuitive, they can sense that you’re a good person.” He tenses up as you tell him he’s a good person. You know exactly what he’s thinking about now, how he punched your husband and then refused to leave. 
Neither one of you wants to talk about that though, not today. 
“What kind of room would you want? Since your current room isn’t to your liking.” He’s quick to change the subject and you let him.
“In all honesty, I like the cabin, I wish we could just live there.” You run your fingers through his curls as you think about it, gently pulling through any tangles.
“My cabin?” His voice is full of uncertainty as he pulls back a bit.
“It’s nice.” You feel a bit defensive, you consider the cabin to be the closest thing you have to a home. “Can you imagine getting to stay on Naboo? We could spend our mornings walking the market.” You rest your hand on the back of his neck now. “We could get jobs in the city, and then at night we’d come home.” 
“To the cabin?” He still sounds rather skeptical of your hypothetical future. 
“I’d cook dinner, you’d do the chores.”
“The cabin’s a bit small for us.” 
“We’d make it a bit bigger, add a few bedrooms, we don’t need that much space.” 
“A few?” He turns his head, his lips brush against your collar briefly as he kisses you there, freezing up when you speak again. 
“At least two, one for us and then some for any little Djarin’s who might need space.” With that he sits up entirely, his legs straddle your stomach.
“Little Djarin’s?”
“And Grogu, he would come live with us as well.” 
“You’d want him to live with us?”
“Of course, he’s a little Djarin.” Your hands rest on his thighs now as he seemingly ponders above you. He hums to himself in silence for a moment and you can’t help but grin at how seriously he’s taking all of this. 
“How many?” He finally speaks again and you laugh at the bluntness of his question. 
“Kids?”
“How many would you want?”
“You go first.” You haven’t ever talked about this sort of thing so you want to gauge his answer first so you don’t scare him too much with all the kids talk. 
“Maybe five? Or six.”
“Six?” Your voice pitches up immediately and you feel a rumble in his chest as he laughs. 
“Or five.”
“How about two, counting Grogu.” Turns out you didn’t need to worry about scaring him off. 
“How about three?” Three is manageable. 
“Counting Grogu?” 
“Counting Grogu.” He seems satisfied with that. 
“I suppose we could have three, you’re the one who has to build all the extra bedrooms.” 
“I don’t mind.”
“I’d work at the library and you’d work in a shipyard, we’d take turns staying home with the kids.” You pull him back to you, taking his hands and dragging him to lay his head on your chest once more.
“I’ve got enough savings, neither one of us has to work if you’d like.” It sends a twinge of pain to your heart how real this conversation has become, knowing that this exact dream isn’t possible. 
You could always make parts of it real.
Someday. 
“I’d want to work, to get out of the house, but you could stay home if you’d like.”
“When they’re still ik’aad, at least for the first few years I’d want to be with them.” He’s going to be a wonderful father. 
“Then I’d work, not long hours, just enough to get me out of the house, when I come home I’d give you a break, you could do the shopping and I’d watch the little’s.” 
“We’d go as a family, I wouldn’t want ‘a break.’” 
“You’d want to wrangle three kids in the markets?” You scoff in disbelief but he continues to sound completely serious. 
“They’d be well behaved.” You seriously doubt that. 
“What about either one of us makes you think our children will be well behaved? Is Grogu well behaved?” 
“We’ll manage.”
“They’ll be wild.” They will, not they would. 
“And smart.” He sits up again, hovering above you to give you a quick kiss. 
“And happy.” There isn’t a doubt in your mind that your children would be happy with Din as their father. 
“You’d really want to live here? I could build us a house anywhere.”
“I like Naboo, at least everything outside of the castle. I don’t even mind the castle, I just don’t care for the people inside it.” It’s true, somewhere along the way this place grew on you immensely. You love the city and the people in it. “And they’d get to play in the garden.” 
“I would build you a cabin anywhere you wanted, and I’d plant you a new garden.” He kisses along your cheeks and forehead as he speaks. 
“You wouldn’t need to plant me a garden if we lived here.” You insist. 
“We can’t live here, mesh’la.” He rubs a small circle with his thumb against your cheek. “This is too serious now, we’re supposed to be relaxed today.”
“When did we agree on that?” You muster up a weak laugh. 
“It was a silent mutual agreement.”
“I’m plenty relaxed.” You mumble. He buries his face in the crook of your neck, his stubble tickling you as you let out an airy giggle. 
“I’m actually very tense and I think we should take a break from all this talking and take care of that.” He mumbles against your shoulder.
“Oh?”
“Mhmm.” He emphasizes his point by pressing his erection against your hip, you hadn’t even realized that this is where he was going with that. 
“How long have you been waiting to jump me?”
“When we started talking about the five kids I was gonna put in you.” He continues to nip at your neck and shoulders as he speaks. 
“Skipping the agreed upon three and going straight to five already? You’re not even going to attempt to negotiate for four?” 
“So you’re open to four?” He pulls back and you can hear his smile. 
“Let’s start with one and go from there.”
“Right now?” His hips stutter down a bit against yours. 
“Maker, you’re insatiable.” You both burst into another fit of laughter. 
“What’s the worst thing that could happen?”
“I could get pregnant, and considering the lack of sex I’ve had with my husband I’m sure that might raise a few eyebrows.” 
“It would never get to that point, when we’re in the clear with this whole Kodo mess I’m getting you out of here.”
“Like… actually leaving Naboo?” 
“Exactly like that. I’m gonna take you far away from here when this is over, gonna keep you all for myself.” His hands move down, giving your hips a squeeze. 
“I’m already yours.” You laughed, rolling over to be on top of him. He’s right, if you’re going to leave anyway then what’s the worst thing that could happen? 
You never talked about that night after that. 
When everything sorted itself out you realized how crazy your fear had made you. You couldn’t just leave. At least that’s what you’d told yourself, now you feel like an idiot for not holding him to his words. It wasn’t realistic, you both knew actually leaving would take so much more preparation than a few whispered ideas during a time where neither one of you was in any position to be making such promises. 
It was just talk.
Lysa came to get you from the dining room. 
After everyone left you had no motivation to move, you just stood there, frozen in time. After a few hours she found you, she had taken your hand and walked you back to your chambers. She held your hand, she kept you upright when you threatened to crumble. And when you felt a wave of nausea ripple through you she rushed you to the fresher, a hand on your back as you threw up all over again. 
You sat breathlessly on the tile, Lysa rubbing your back.
“Gods, I’ve been nauseous since the wedding. Even before everything fell apart.” It’s the first words you’ve spoken since they took Din, your stomach is still churning. “This has never happened before.” You groan, you’ve had many moments of upset throughout your life, but none that made you physically ill. Lysa looks almost painfully worried. 
“Ma’am… is there a chance you might be…” 
Kriff.
You never talked about that night after that. 
Maybe you should have. 
You both did a lot of things during those days. You had been so angry, and he had done everything in his power to ease that anger, to keep both of you as happy as someone could be in your situation. 
You shouldn’t have used that as an excuse to be reckless. 
“I’d like to go to bed.” 
“Of course.” She helps you to your feet, walking you back to your room, you turn to her one last time before you close the door. 
“I’m sorry. Elaine never should have gotten involved in all this.” You’d trade places with her in a heartbeat if you could. 
“It’s not your fault.” She truly seems to believe that. 
Except it is. Elaine never would have found herself in this situation if she hadn’t so often been helping the two of you keep your secret. 
“Goodnight, Lysa.” 
“Goodnight, princess.” 
You lay on the bed, unable to bring yourself to sleep in the closet. 
It’s cold. Colder than Hoth, as you stare at the ceiling in your far too big bed in your far too big room. Even bigger now that it’s just you. 
You let your hand roam down your torso to rest on your stomach.
Just you, hopefully. 
You’re now having nightly dinners with Kodo. 
You don’t get any respite from him, you just want to stay in bed. You’re nauseous and tired and your head hasn’t stopped spinning since that night. A million thoughts a minute. 
Where is he?
Is he okay?
What the fuck can I do about it?
Mostly that. 
The worst part is your lack of a plan. If the roles were reversed Din would have already rescued you and you’d be living happily ever after. 
But that isn’t how your story is going. Instead you are alone, with no scheme on how to get to him. It’s only been three days but it’s driving you insane, you have never known such hopelessness, it’s maddening. To sit alone in your room all day, staring at the ceiling until Lysa comes to dress you for dinner. Neither one of you ever speaks, afterall, what would you say to each other?
“I’m sorry the love of your life had been sentenced to die?”
How morbid. 
Not that you’re above being morbid. 
You think about it often. How easy it would be to drive your dinner knife into Kodo’s throat. You’re seated beside him now at dinner, both of you at the head of the table, joined by the rest of his family. 
The thought of killing him is the only thing that brings you peace these days. You’ve never once in your life been violent until now. Din is good. He’s a good man. In every way he is the opposite of your husband yet Din is the one locked away, Maker knows where, while Kodo is being rewarded. 
It doesn’t make you mad, it makes you furious. 
It makes you want to poison his wine. 
But you don’t have poison. 
And you can’t put yourself in danger. Because you feel fundamentally different, and even if you refuse to think that such a thing is possible you know you wouldn’t just be putting yourself in danger. There’s more at stake now. 
That’s what you tell yourself to stay calm, a feat that is getting harder by the minute as you’re sat beside Kodo who is currently bragging about how he defeated a Mandalorian. 
“They aren’t as strong as you think they are. Under the armor they’re weak, pathetic.” 
It took six battle droids to keep him down. You didn’t even get near him. 
“Some people just need to be taught a lesson, don’t touch what isn’t yours.” He sneers and the rest of the table erupts into laughter. “I certainly taught that horned bitch a lesson as well, you all should have seen what they brought me last night.” 
You perk up, this is the only thing they’ve said in days that truly matters to you. You’ve heard nothing about the current state of either of them until now. 
“What did they do to Elaine?” Everyone’s head turns to you, all their expressions look as if you’ve announced something treasonous but Kodo smiles as if he were explaining something to a child. 
“She was properly punished, the way someone who observed such a crime with no intervention should be.” He puts his hand over yours when he says it. 
You don’t ask for any follow up. 
You don’t think you could stomach it, so you stay silent for the rest of your meal. When you’re finished you stand, the rest of the table is starting to pour more drinks but you simply lean down, mumbling something about being tired before giving Kodo a quick kiss on the cheek and dismissing yourself. 
You’re waiting for the night where he joins you in your chambers, after all his father is dead, but it has yet to happen. He had told you that once he was king he would be in need of heirs but he seems happy enough with his pleasure houses and you’re more than grateful for the women you entertain him so you don’t have to. 
So you return to your chambers alone, peeling off your gown before burying yourself under the covers. 
Sleep evades you as you toss and turn. You aren’t even tired, there’s too much going on in your mind, there’s no room for exhaustion. After about an hour you manage to drift in and out of unconsciousness, earning a brief reprieve from your anxieties until a sharp knocking has you jolting upright. 
You don your robe, rubbing sleep from your eyes as you rush to the door, you’re too tired to wonder who might even be bothering you at such an hour as you pull the door open. 
Lysa?
“We have to hurry, ma’am.” She grabs your arm, frantically tugging you into the hall. 
“Lysa? What are you doing? Are you okay?” 
“I am fine, but we don’t have much time.”
“Surely you have enough to tell me where we are going.” 
“Do you want to see him or not?” 
Din.
You nod, taking her hand as he rushes onward, stopping at each hall to peer around the corners until you make your way to a servants stairwell, skipping several steps in your descent until you run out of stairs. You’ve never been down here, you didn’t even know there were dungeons until recently. 
It makes your stomach twist in knots the moment you stare into the darkness. 
“Are there no guards?” You whisper, squeezing her hand.
“Not for the next hour, I’ve made sure of it.” She begins walking down the poorly lit corridor, pulling you along behind her. 
The stone floor is damp and it smells of mildew. Your bare feet are already freezing after just a few steps.
Every cell you pass is lit from the outside with a hanging lantern, they’re mostly empty, but you catch glimpses of movement out of the corner of your eye every now and then. In all honesty you’re doing your best to take in as little as possible, you don’t want to think about Din being down here in such a place, but there’s one element you can’t ignore. 
The wailing. 
Someone is weeping, a low, sorrowful song filling the vast maze of halls and you realize quickly you’re heading in its direction, Lysa tenses beside you as you continue on. You’re about to turn one more corner when she abruptly stops, turning to face you.
“He needs to eat.” She removes a fistful of rations from her apron pocket, shoving them into your hands. 
“He hasn’t?” He’s been down here for three days. 
“He won’t… let me.” You pause, cocking your head to the side and she gives you an apologetic look when she turns. “He won’t let me uncover his face.”
Oh. 
“I’ll feed him.” You nod slowly, tucking them into your own pockets before turning the corner. The contents of the cell immediately on your right have you stumbling backwards but Lysa is not swayed, pulling a key from her pocket, unlocking the door quickly before handing it to you. 
“He’s two cells down, on your right.” She doesn’t look at you as she rushes in, pulling a roll of bandages from her dress. “Shh… it’s okay, I’m here.” Her voice goes soft as she kneels beside Elaine. You can’t help it as you step into the entryway of the cell. 
Well, you’ve found the source of the wailing. 
She’s sat on a cot, curled in on herself as Lysa carefully peels back a series of soiled bandages from her face. 
“I’ve got you, it’s just me.” She continues to make an attempt to sooth a rather hysterical Elaine as she peels back the final layer of bandages and your stomach flips. “You’re okay, love, I need to change these.” You don’t know how Lysa is so calm, even in the darkness you can see the extent of her wounds. Now you know what they brought Kodo last night.  
Both eyes. 
“She was properly punished, the way someone who observed such a crime with no intervention should be.” 
Oh gods. 
You’re worried you may collapse as you watch Lysa tend to her with no hesitation, cleaning them with a careful hand before she begins to redress them. You can’t bear to watch any longer as Elaine begins sobbing once more. You try desperately to force the sight of your mutilated friend from your mind as you count down two more cells before quickly fumbling for the lock, letting it hit the floor as you take the lantern outside the door off its hook, bringing it into the dark room. 
It isn’t like Elaine’s cell. 
There’s no bed or interior light, it’s terribly dark and fetid, his cell running deeper than her’s. It takes a few steps for you to finally illuminate the room enough to see him. 
Maker. 
What have they done to your Din? 
You don’t hear Elaine anymore, there isn't a single thing that could distract you from the scene in front of you. There is nothing but the sight of your kar’ta. There’s too much for you to worry about, you don’t even know where to start, you’re frozen in place, a small part of your brain refuses to recognize the man before you as Din at all. He shouldn’t look like this. 
Armorless. 
They’ve stripped him of any clothing you recognize, the thought alone makes you nearly lose your dinner. 
They took his helmet, replacing it with a linen sack.  
Did they see his face?
You briefly have to shut your eyes, taking a deep breath as you take in the rest of him. His clothes are too thin, he must be freezing, they’ve dressed him in a cotton tunic and trousers that end just below the knee. You can see just how beaten and bruised he is. Unlike Elaine he’s in chains, kneeling on the floor with his hands shackled, taut above his head. You swallow the lump in your throat and finally crouch down in front of him, setting the lantern down beside you as you reach out to place a hand on his chest.
“Din…” Your voice cracks and the moment you come in contact with him he flinches back. Suddenly you know how Lysa held it together so well with Elaine, she just had to. You can’t fall apart, who would care for him now if you did? “It’s me, just me. Just me.” You whisper and place a hand over his heart but withdraw it quickly when he trembles under your touch. You ache at the sight of it but more than anything you’re confused, it only takes a moment for you to realize the issue. 
He doesn’t have his helmet. They’ve not only left him here blind, but deaf, of course any touch would frighten him. 
He assumes you're here to harm him. 
You lean in, careful not to come in contact with him as you speak clearly and loudly. 
“Din?” His trembling stops instantly. You find it a bit troublesome how much worse his hearing seems to have gotten in such a short time, you’re half tempted to reach under the bag to make sure he still has his ears. 
“Sarad?” Oh, Din. His voice is terribly small and it sends you forward, wrapping your arms around him as you pull him into an unreciprocated embrace. 
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” You make sure to speak loud enough for him before pulling back, placing your hands against the fabric covering his face. 
“Are you okay?” He coughs a bit as he asks and you almost laugh at how ridiculous the question is considering the state he’s in. Are you okay? 
Technically no. 
But far better than he’s doing. 
“I’m perfectly fine, what can I do for you? Are you hurting?” You feel his face through the bag as you look down across his body. It doesn’t look like there’s been any permanent damage outside of a pretty nasty cut on one of his legs. 
“Don’t worry about me.”
“Now’s not the time to play the hero, Din.” He flinches a little and you calm your tone immediately. What the hell did they do to him? “Just let me help.”
“How’d you get down here?” 
“Lysa, she says you aren’t eating.” 
“She’d have to lift my- the bag to do it.” He sounds apologetic, as if you could ever fault him for following his creed. 
“It’s okay… may I?” You bring your hands to the hem of the bag but his head turns sharply.
“I- I don’t want you to look.” 
You have no response. He’s always wanted you to look. 
“I just, I don’t think you wanna see the condition I’m in. I don’t want your only memories of my face to be this.” He whispers when you don’t respond.
You should have looked when he asked you to. You should have done a lot of things differently. 
You shouldn’t have waited so long to look. 
You shouldn't have waited so long to tell him you loved him. 
You should have just let yourself love him. Why did you fight it for so long? It seems silly now. If you could do it all again you would have just taken his helmet off the first night you met him and you would have married him right then and there. You would have left Naboo that night.
And you would never keep any of it from him. You would tell him how important he is and how loved he is, you wouldn’t make him wait. 
Even now you can’t help it though, censoring yourself out of fear. Do you tell him about how nauseous you get every morning? About the way Lysa stares at your belly when she does your makeup? 
No. 
It wouldn’t do either of you any good, not when he’s in this situation. 
You take hold of the edges of the bag once more, gentler this time. 
“I’ll close my eyes.” You lift the fabric completely off of him, setting it in your lap as you simultaneously shut your eyes. You keep one hand on his face, using your thumb to find the corner of his mouth as your other hand fumbles to open a ration bar. You feel him part his lips as you feed him. He’s barely chewing, eating quickly and swallowing most of it whole. “Have they fed you at all?” You whisper as he finishes the first bar in a matter of seconds, his teeth lightly scraping against your fingers before you withdraw them, tearing open another bar.
“No.” His voice is still soft as you go to feed him once more, opening each package until he’s eaten them all. 
“Are you still hungry? I could see if Lysa has more.” 
“I’m okay.” You let your head fall forward, resting your forehead on his. 
“What else can I do for you?” 
“Nothing. Being here is enough.” 
If you had felt helpless before it was nothing compared to this. This is more than helplessness, it’s despair. 
“I’m sorry.” You pull yourself further into his lap, wrapping your arms around him in the process. 
“Hey… none of this is your fault.” It certainly feels like it is. Why does he keep comforting you when he’s the one shivering and alone down here? 
“Please, there has to be something I can do to help you.” 
“There is one thing.” You almost open your eyes, you're so relieved, you just want to ease his pain. 
“Anything. I’ll do anything.” 
“I need you to promise me you won’t look.”
“Won’t look?” Your eyes are already closed, you couldn’t look any less if you tried. 
“When they do it. I don’t want you to see it- it won’t be pretty.”
When they separate his head from his body. 
“I won’t.” You can’t deny him this, you’ll give him anything he wants. “Do you know how much I love you?” You whisper before leaning forward another inch to kiss him. 
The question is genuine. It terrifies you to your core to think that he may not know just how much you love him. 
“Of course sarad.” He murmurs against your lips until you let your head rest on his shoulder, fighting back tears. 
What do you say now?
What do you say to a man condemned to death? 
“I love you.” You mumble into the thin fabric of his tunic. 
“I love you too.” After a moment more with him you hear metal jingling as Lysa locks Elaine's cell once more. You quickly pull back from him, pulling the bag back over his head, once you know he can’t see you anymore the tears flow freely. Lysa steps into the cell and you remove your robe, wrapping it around him, immediately he begins to protest. 
“Mesh’la, you can’t leave this here.” His voice is strained and it makes you sick to think he started crying once he was out of sight as well. 
“Please, y-you’re gonna freeze.”
“They’ll know you were here, sarad’ika.” 
“Din…” You’re practically babbling as Lysa removes your robe from his shoulders, an apologetic look on her face as she grabs your arm. 
“Ma’am, I’m sorry, but we need to go.” Tears sting your eyes as Lysa urges you to hurry but you don’t want to leave him, you want to stay, no matter the consequence. You pull away from her, wrapping your arms around his torso. 
“You need to go.” His voice is urgent through the fabric as you cling to him tighter. 
Would it be easier to just stay? Get caught and join him at the executioners? You’re genuinely considering it when you feel your stomach churn once more and you’re reminded of the exact reason why you can’t stay. Before you lose your nerve and shatter completely you lift the bag, just enough to give you an eyeful of his split lip and bruised jaw as you gently lean in and kiss him one more time. 
Doing everything in your power to remember exactly what it feels like.
The curve of his lips and the shape of his chin, the overgrown stubble brushing against your skin as you press your face harder against his, desperation taking over as you taste salt on his lips. You hold him as long as you can, until you hear Lysa urging you to make haste once more. 
“I love you.” You press your forehead to his through the fabric, feeling the familiar shape of his face against yours. 
“I’ll always be yours.” 
That was the last thing he was able to say before you let Lysa drag you out of the dungeons. 
It’s like everythings suddenly back to the beginning. 
You wake up alone, you go to bed alone, and you wander the castle alone.
There is no plotting or scheming to free Din. 
Even if you were a trained killer or bounty hunter, it would be more than difficult to get him out of the dungeon and on a ship off Naboo. It would be even harder to do so when you’re one of the most recognizable people on the planet. 
He is buried deep beneath the ground and there is nothing you can do about it. 
After all, you're just a doll. 
You don’t know when it happened but all your clothes are blue again. Every dress Lysa fetches from the closet is a different shade of blue and all your nightgowns are the color of the sky. A personal brand put on you by Kodo. It’s clearly more than just a preference now, it’s a reminder to you and everyone else that you’re his. 
And time blends. 
You know a date was set right around the time you visited him. One week until Kodo’s coronation and two until the execution. His first public event after being crowned king will be a death sentence, how fitting. 
So you wake. 
And you sleep. 
And you walk. 
Kodo never replaces Din and you haven’t seen Leo since that night, so you’re completely alone. It’s like he’s rubbing in the fact that you’re powerless. There’s no need for you to have a guard, you can’t leave. If you tried you’d be escorted back in an instant. 
You tried to convince Lysa to let you see him again last night. 
“Please, just a few minutes-“
“I’m sorry ma’am, it’s just not possible. The only reason I was able to get you down there the first time was because the guard that usually lets me in was working nights, he won’t be working nights again until next month.”
Din won’t live to see next month. 
“Is he eating?”
“He won’t let me-“
“You need to insist. Tell him I insist, and tell him you’ll close your eyes.” 
She pins back a bit of your hair, leaving half up and half down. You both bask in the silence for a moment.
“I’ll make sure he eats.”
“Thank you.”
That had been the last conversation you had with Lysa. 
She doesn’t come to dress you in the morning. You think nothing of it and dress yourself in the gown she’d laid out last night. It’s a bit difficult, putting your coronation gown on on your own but eventually you manage, when you’re fully dressed in the obscenely decadent blue fabric you begin to worry. 
You have no reason to assume that everything is fine. It would actually make sense for this to be a worst case scenario situation, everything else in your life is right now. 
You’re about to leave in search of her but you decide against it. Sitting at the vanity and doing your makeup as quickly as possible, the last thing you need to do right now is give Kodo a reason to be upset with you, you have to be presentable. You smear the shimmering blue eyeshadow across your lids before rushing out of your room. 
The halls are full. Servants move quickly from room to room, cleaning every inch as you carefully push through the crowds, making a beeline towards the dining room. 
Kodo is seething when you push open the large doors. 
He stands at the end of the table, shoving an armored guard as the veins in his neck jut out in his rage. 
“Where could she have possibly gone? She’s blind. You’re telling me some blind bitch outsmarted my entire guard?” 
Your heart flutters at the thought.
They escaped.
Your hope is shattered the moment Kodo begins speaking again.
“At least we still have the Mandalorian… I want security tripled, guards stationed outside his cell at all times.” He continues grumbling for a moment until he realizes you’re there. “Happy coronation day dear wife! I’m afraid we’ve had a rough morning here, somehow in the night the Togruta girl escaped, do not fret, we’ll find her.” 
God's you hope not.
Even if things are worse than ever regarding Din there is one flicker of light in that darkness. Lysa got Elaine out. Knowing that almost puts you at ease.
“Happy coronation day.” You actually manage a smile when you look at your husband, it’s weak but it’s genuine. You want to be mad that they didn’t help Din escape but you just can’t be. You know they most likely tried but if the roles had been reversed and you could only get one of them out you wouldn’t hesitate. 
So there is no animosity. Just a flicker of happiness for them.
They got out.
You were under the impression that a coronation was a happy event. Yet when you step out onto the castle steps it seems to be quite the opposite. 
They look miserable. 
All of their faces are sullen and dejected. How shocking, no one is excited about Kodo being crowned king. He didn’t have any of the outside of the castle decorated or made presentable in any way. No one reacts when Kodo reads from an ancient looking book until a crown is placed on his head. 
A moment afterwards you’re instructed to kneel and a tiara is placed onto your head. 
The audience is silent and you feel shame when you stare out at them.
Even if you don’t have very much power you still feel as if you’ve failed them. The feeling follows you when you’re directed to the dining hall with Kodo.
“I have a couple gifts for you, wife.” His twisted smile makes your stomach turn as you enter the dining hall, now decorated with blue and gray banners.  
“A gift? You shouldn’t have, my king, I- I didn’t get you anything.” You feign remorse as you take a sip of the wine in front of you on instinct before spitting it back up into the cup. 
“That’s more than okay, you’re my gift, sweet wife, all mine.” The thought of such a thing makes you sick, you smile despite yourself. 
“That’s very kind.” You’ll only ever be Din’s. No amount of blue fabric and faux smiles can change that. He snaps his fingers and a large box is brought to you by a servant, they set it directly in front of you on the table. You look at Kodo who nods, sitting back in his chair as you stand, the box is wrapped in checkered blue paper, a large bow adorning the top. Your hands tremble a bit as you take hold of the edges of the ribbon, tugging on them until the bow slips free, much to your surprise the entire box falls open, the sides collapsing giving you an immediate view of the contents. 
The silver, shimmering contents. 
Din’s helmet. 
Polished like new, it sits before you, and the room suddenly empties. It’s as if you are completely alone, despite all the eyes that are most definitely pinned on you right now. Your hands continue to shake as your fingers wrap around the beskar steel, like you would when you held Din’s face, lifting it to glare into the visor. 
Empty. 
You can’t help but stare at your own emptiness reflected back at you. 
You want to hold it close, press it to your forehead but you’re snapped back to reality by the grating sound of Kodo’s voice breaking you from your focus on the helm between your hands. 
“That’s only one of your presents, open the next one.” He hisses gleefully. 
You set the helmet down, realizing there was another, much smaller box underneath it. Silently you scoop it up and cradle it in your hands. It’s a larger than a ring box, it just barely fits in your palm as you ever so gently open it, swinging the top open as if it were a tiny treasure chest.              
Huh.
It takes a moment.
You aren’t exactly sure what it is you’re looking at at first but when it registers your entire body tenses up, your grip tightening on the gift box. 
Bloody and pink, a tongue. 
Of course you know better than to assume Kodo would give you any old tongue. This is a special someone’s tongue. 
No, no, no, no, no. 
You had loved his tongue before anything else.
He can’t do this, he cannot do this to you.
You had fallen for his sharp wit first, it was what drew you into him. His sweet words had won you back, his declaration of devotion.
Now you hold all of that in the palm of your hand. 
“What do we say?” His nasally voice breaks through your mental anguish. 
No.
“Come on, where are your manners?”
Please. 
“Thank you.” Your whisper is nearly silent as you struggle to keep down the scream bubbling in your throat.
“What was that?” 
You clear your throat. 
“Thank you.” 
He makes you take it with you. You don’t bother telling him you won’t be attending the coronation ball in a few minutes, it’s not like you’ll be missed. 
In one arm you’re cradling his helmet, in the other the little blue box. 
You set each one down carefully onto the bed, even if it’s a bit demented these are the only parts of him you have left. You stare at the little box. 
You have never been hateful. 
Kodo made you into this. You are full of hate, for most things at this point. You hate your husband, you hate your room, and most of all you hate the little blue box on the bed. 
And the music starts. 
It must be deafening in the hall for you to hear it from your room but it’s there, loud and demanding of your attention. 
You’re moving before you even have a chance to think about it, in a few quick strides you’re standing beside the vanity, your hands gripping the top of the mirror as you pull it down in one swift motion, the contents spill everywhere and the glass shatters in an instant, shards splattering the floor but you take no time to process it. 
You move on to the next thing.
You yank each drawer from the dresser, throwing them to the floor, clothes strewn about until it’s light enough for you to push the entire dresser over. In your frenzy you go about the room toppling every stupid fucking table over. So many fucking end tables in  one room, and you throw everyone to the floor, trinkets and vases clattering to the ground as you destroy the room. You get a rush of adrenaline as you lift one of your nightstands and throw it against the wall leaving a small dent but more importantly the force of it makes anything hanging on the wall tumble to the floor, glass frames shatter. 
Your chest heaves as you stare at the carnage.  
And it isn’t enough.
Your face is wet with tears and your hands with blood from cuts you didn’t feel upon your skin as you tear open the closet door, the pile of blankets mock you from the floor, you grab them, your vision now blurry with tears as you pull them out of the closet, throwing them onto your bedroom floor. When you return to the closet you’re in a frenzy, you tear at the fabric before you, yanking each and every dress off their hangers, ripping what you can.
There is nothing else for you to do, so you destroy everything you can get your hands on until the only thing left untouched is your bed, left in pristine condition as you let out a small sob. 
Maybe you are a hateful person now. 
You feel as though you have every right to be at this point. 
You step over the shard of glass, giving your bloody hands a glance before wiping them on your gown.
Happy coronation day. 
You sit on the bed, your trembling fingers wrap around the helmet, now that you’re alone you waste no time to hold it against you face, until your body just gives up, too tired to stay awake anymore.
A guard wakes you in the morning, knocking on your door, when you answer it they tell you Kodo requires your presence in his chambers.
You dress in a blue gown that you don’t look too closely at. Stopping at the fresher on the way, rinsing the dried gore from your palms, wincing as you clean your wounds. None of which seem too deep. 
You want to cut Kodo’s tongue out, to make him feel it. But you know that sort of thing would be an impossible task. So you daydream about it as you walk. You’re more than displeased when you open the door and are greeted by Leodall. You hadn’t seen him since that night and from the looks of it he wasn’t expecting you. He swallows loudly when you step inside Kodo’s room.
Normally you’d be curious, you’d probably take a look around but your eyes refuse to focus on anything but Leo as you scowl at him. 
“Why’d you do it?” You don’t hesitate to ask, you have no idea how quickly Kodo will be joining you. 
He simply stares at you, shame apparent on his face.
“You owe me an explanation at the very least.” You cross your arms in front of your chest as he clears his throat. 
“I thought he’d reward me.”
You laugh. A harsh dry sound 
“What could he have possibly given you that you couldn’t have just asked me for?” Your gaze never softens and you’re practically seeing red as you stare at him.
“I thought he’d give me a lordship.” 
You can’t help it as another crisp and pained laugh slips past your lips. 
“You thought Kodo would raise your status? I thought you were supposed to be smart.” Is he an idiot? “He doesn’t see servants as people, if you wanted such a thing you could have asked me, maybe I could have done something.” 
A glimmer of something similar to hope flashes through his eyes. 
“Would you- would you consider doing so now?”
“You cannot be serious-” Your expression goes from fury to disbelief as you stand. 
“It seemed worth asking.” He puts his hands up defensively as you storm up to him, poking a finger into his face. 
“You slimy little weasel, it should be you on the chopping block, not him. If it were up to me I’d have them put your head on a spike.” The words pour out of you like venom. 
“I would be nicer to me if I were you.” He sneers and your incredulity only grows. You can’t help it, you scoff in his face. 
“I would rather die.” A part of you really means it. 
“You might if you aren’t careful, I saved your life by letting Elaine and your Mandalorian take the fall, I could have told the king that you were a willing participant. I saw the two of you together, I read your little rules. He never forced himself on you. I wonder what Kodo might think about that.” You aren’t a fighter, you’ve never so much as thrown a punch in your life but you grab him by the collar of his shirt and slam him into the wall, the back of his head hits the stone and you don’t feel an ounce of remorse as you do so. 
“Do it.” You tilt your head to the side, almost as if you’re taunting him. “Tell him.” Any of the confidence he briefly had is gone in an instant. “The moment you do I’ll tell him that you’re covering your tracks, and that you made a pass at me. I wonder how Kodo would reward you for trying to touch what’s his?” Leo’s head turns as you both hear Kodo’s piercing voice in the hall. You release your grip on his shirt, brushing off your gown as you turn towards the door. Kodo and three others make their way into the room as Leo coughs behind you. 
“Dear wife, I have another gift for you.” He takes a step to the side, gesturing at a line of three people you don’t give so much as a glance. He doesn’t even seem to notice the obvious tension in the room. “A new staff!”
“I don’t need a new staff, I’m fine on my own.” You abandon the pleasantries. You’re in such a state of upset right now, what's the point? 
“You’re the queen now, staff is required. These three will replace the ones you've lost in a week, until then Leodall will be training them intensively to tend to your every need. Two guards will also be assigned to you but I promise they will be much less loathsome than your Mandalorian.”
All five of them will be trained to keep an eye on you. To report back to Kodo, after everything with Din you should have known he’d keep you on a shorter leash. 
You barely look at them. 
You hate them. 
You shouldn’t, they’ve done nothing wrong, but you hate them. 
You give each one a quick up and down, naming them in your mind. 
A BD-3000 droid commands the most authority just based on how she stands so you mentally note her as Elaine's replacement. You’ll call her new Elaine. 
New Lysa is a pasty young blonde woman with rosy cheeks. You truly wonder how well informed she has been on your circumstance. She’s smiling from ear to ear and seemingly couldn’t be happier to be here. 
And new Leo is somehow even more nervous looking than actual Leo, practically shaking like a leaf at the sight of you. The bags under his eyes are worse than your own. A lanky thing with messy brown hair. 
There’s no reason for you to fight this, Kodo always gets his way so why bother. So you nod. You don’t pretend to be grateful this time, instead you shove your way past all of them, content to return to your room and never leave. 
The morning of the execution comes before you’re ready for it. 
Of course you didn’t sleep last night, how could you?
You dress yourself, apparently your new staff isn’t starting until tomorrow, not that you mind another day to yourself. You manage to find something that isn’t blue, a gray dress trimmed with gold, the closest thing you’ll find to funeral attire. No one else will dress with any respect for him but they can’t stop you. Your vanity is destroyed so you don’t bother with your hair or your makeup, you simply don’t care enough. 
For the most part you feel nothing when you open the door, only emptiness until you look down. 
Someone left you a small vase of flowers. 
You pick them up, taking a closer look but your heart skips a beat when you do so.
Daisies. 
After a few short breaths you throw the vase into the wall across from your door, tiny shards of porcelain fly everywhere as two servants at the end of the hall give you a look of horror. Your shoes crunch over the remains of it as you make your way down the hall and to the entryway of the castle. 
Kodo insists that the two of you get to see him first. 
You’re sweating wildly out on the steps as you wait.
Long before you’re ready for it they bring him out. 
A shivering skeleton of a man with a linen bag over his head, immediately bile rises in your throat. Kodo is grinning ear to ear when his legs are kicked out from under him and he’s forced to kneel.
Kodo himself reaches forward and tears the bag off, too excited for any decorum or finesse. 
You gasp as you stare down at the broken man before you.
In all honesty he isn’t at all what you envisioned. 
His eyes verge on being hazel; they're such a light brown. You’d always pictured them to be nearly black. It doesn’t matter what color they are though, when you see the tears forming in his lash line you flinch, clutching the ring on your necklace to silently let him know silently just how much he means to you. 
He’s a mess. 
You don’t like looking at what those weeks in the dungeons did to him and the last thing you need to do right now is empty your stomach on the palace steps. 
He’s too thin. Far, far, too thin, it’s like his entire being has shrunk down. He’s hollow.
Your breath hitches when Kodo grabs a fistful of his dark hair, forcing him to turn and stare at the crowd. They must have cut it while he was down there it’s a mess, jagged edges and shorter than you’re used to. 
“This man has committed an act of treason against the crown.” His voice is loud and booming as the city goes quiet. “For such a crime he shall face the proper punishment.” He yanks him downawards, you watch in horror as Din’s head hits the stone, an incoherent mess of sounds pour from his bloody mouth and you have to look away. 
He didn’t want you to look.
You remind yourself to try and calm your breathing. You can hear the scuffle as they drag him to the guillotine, placing his neck into the wooden divot, your heart threatening to beat out of your chest as you turn to look. His eyes are everywhere but on you as he looks at the people around him, desperately pleading for his life. Not a single person so much as glances at him, afterall, it’s just nonsense, no one can understand him without a tongue. 
You can’t stand it, you almost cover your ears but you manage to resist as Kodo puts an arm around your waist, pulling you close to him. 
“You’re welcome, sweet wife.” He whispers, his breath hot and wet against your ear. 
Fuck it. 
You don’t suppress the shudder in your spine as you shoot him a look of disgust. In a matter of moments everything you care about will be gone, why pretend any longer.
A bellowing chime plays from a nearby clock tower and you know it’s time, you straighten up as you stare at the guillotine in abject horror. 
This is it. 
Your chest rises and falls in sharp short bursts as everyone prepares themselves, a hush forming among the crowd on the street. 
And it begins, a chain reaction that you cannot stop now that the executioner has his ax raised above his head.
You had expected more. More time.
A part of you thought that time would slow, that you’d have a chance to stop it. 
But no. 
There is no epic fairy tale moment where the sun glimmers off of the blade and the executioner raises his ax, giving you this perfect moment to run to him, to shield him from the inevitable, to beg them to take you with him. 
That moment never comes. 
You barely have enough time to close your eyes like you promised him. In one unbroken motion the rope is cut, the blade falls and boom. 
Just like that, he’s gone. 
When you hear the metal slicing through the air you squeeze your eyes shut, hearing only the wet crunch as it cuts through flesh and bone. A soft, squishy thud when his head hits the stone. 
In fashion with your decision to no longer hide your disgust from Kodo you vomit. Bending down you puke onto the stones, spraying your own, and Kodo’s feet. The triumphant smile on his face vanishes as he realizes what’s happened. You wipe your mouth on the back of your hand, refusing to look at Din’s limp body as you give Kodo one last look of detestation before turning around and running back into the castle, not caring what anyone thinks anymore.
The moment you’re inside the reality of it all settles in as you feel tears falling wildly as you run up the steps to your room.
You have been good, and kind, and in return the maker rewarded you by killing the love of your life. 
So when you stand in the center of your demolished room you do the only thing your body can do at this point. 
You scream. 
From deep within your stomach, you scream, loud and raw. 
If anything was left unbroken in your room you’d be throwing it at the wall. But there’s nothing so you scream. 
You shriek.
You howl. 
And you wail.
You scream until there is no more noise. Your voice, like the rest of you, gives up. 
You aren’t sure how late it is when you finally stop. You’re tired and it’s dark outside and your throat is raw. 
And you lay on the floor. Because the bed is too big, and too cold, and the closet is so empty. So the only place left to sleep is there. You lay on the floor with no more tears to cry and no more sounds to scream as you stare at your bed, only from this angle can you see a rectangular shape under your bed frame. 
You wipe your nose with a stray piece of fabric before slowly crawling over to it, you sit on the floor and when you retrieve the item a brand new lump forms in your throat as you stare down at the box Din had bought all those days ago at the market. 
Your failsafe. 
With quivering hands you open it, staring into the small space containing a mess of items but what catches your eye is a piece of folded paper with your name on it. You take it between your fingers, opening it, careful to not let your tears fall onto it. 
Sarad’ika,
If you’re reading this then I’m afraid things aren’t going all that well for me. There are plenty of possible reasons as to why I’m no longer with you, but what’s important is that I plan on doing everything in my power to get back to you. There is only one thing in the galaxy that could keep me from your side, and if that is my fate then this box will ensure you’re taken care of. 
The most important thing is for you to get off this planet. I have included a few possible plans for you, do what you have to to survive. Elaine will help you escape. 
You can seek out Greef Karga on Nevarro. Tell him Din Djarin sent you, tell him what’s happened and he will see to it that you are cared for. Explain our circumstances and I am certain he will provide you with safe lodging. 
Tatooine is also an option. You’ll find a Mandalorian there by the name of Boba Fett, he will not turn you away. You will be protected there, if you need to relocate for some reason after that he will help you locate the Mandalorian convert. Show the Mandalorians your ring and you will be cared for the rest of your life, the convert will protect you. 
As an absolute last resort there is a planet located in the Outer Ring called Ossus. There is a school there, taught by a man named Luke Skywalker. I doubt he would be eager to take you in but you must insist. Bring the chainmail, they’ll know who sent you. Take care of each other. 
In this box you will find enough credits to get you off planet and take care of you for several months, a year if you’re frugal, I suggest you take a few jewelry pieces to pawn off for extra credits as well. You will find a small chainmail shirt, and a necklace of mine. 
And lastly you will find your vibroblade. 
Protect yourself. You’re strong, and more than capable of doing so.
I have one request for you, please, I will only ask this one thing of you. 
Be smart. 
You are the smartest and kindest person I have ever had the honor of knowing. Be smart, take care of yourself. If the roles were reversed I know that I would go to extremes to either get you back, or find justice for you. And all I can do is ask that you do not attempt any such thing, the only thing I would ever want for you is safety and happiness. 
So seek those things out. 
Be safe. Be happy.   
I was lucky to know you, and even luckier to be yours. 
an ner kar'taylir darasuum, 
Din
All my love. 
You flip the paper over, desperate for more, more Din, but all you find is scrawled coordinates to each location. Your fingers sift through the items, everything he promised is found inside but you latch onto the blade. Laying back down on the floor you clutch it between your fingers as you think of Din.
Din, who was yours.
Din, who they took from you.
Who Kodo, took from you. 
And your grip on the knife tightens. 
Two guards stand outside your door round the clock now. 
They never follow you or come into your room but they’re there, silently watching as you direct all your anger at your new staff. As promised Leo trained them to be as persistent and infuriating as he was. 
When the two new girls come to fetch you in the morning you can’t help it when you scream at them to leave you alone and to stop trying to clean the ever growing mess of things. 
It doesn’t matter that it isn’t their fault, you can’t stand the sight of anyone. 
All three of them try. New Elaine and Lysa show up three times a day, trying to dress you and squeeze their way past you into the room but after enough shrieking they always leave you be. 
New Leo usually tries once or twice a day, you don’t even look at him. You always stare at the floor, when he tries to speak you give him the same treatment as the girls, screaming at him and slamming the door. 
Why should you let them in? You know what they are. They’re here to spy on you, to be Kodo’s eyes while he’s busy being king. They’re easy to evade. When you leave to fetch yourself food or a book from the library you easily outrun them. The two girls are worse at navigating the castle than you were when you first arrived and new Leo has a bad leg, sometimes he’ll make attempts to limp after you but they’re always unsuccessful. 
You think of nothing, day after day because there is nothing to think about. 
Except for the fact that Kodo took your future away from you. He took everything from you. 
If you thought time was blending before Din’s death nothing could have prepared you for now. You don’t track the days as well, you keep your curtains drawn and only leave when you get hungry or start to think of Din. The last thing you need to do is have another screaming fit so you keep him locked away in your heart, an ache that’s always there that you don’t address. 
One day, in a fit of tears you took your knife and decided on a whim to kill Kodo. You didn’t care about the repercussions at that point you just wanted him to suffer but the moment you opened the door you nearly tripped, stumbling backwards the guards didn’t so much as glance at you. 
Another vase of flowers.
You’re tempted to just kick them down the hall but you can’t help yourself when you lean down to pick them up. 
A bouquet of blue lilies. Your nose twitches at the sight of them, out of the corner of your eye you see new Lysa and new Elaine approaching so you take the opportunity to slam the little glass vase into the stone floor. Glaring at them when you do before returning to your room. 
Maybe it’s been three days since Din died. 
Maybe it’s been three months. 
You aren’t sure.
You aren’t sure when you made plans to kill Kodo either but suddenly you have them. A fool proof way to get him alone. 
And suddenly you’re dressed for the first time in, well, however long it’s been. In a baby blue nightie with a robe you march out into the hall. The guards watch in silence as you walk away, your bare feet scampering down the stairs until you find yourself watching the main entrance. Waiting for your loving husband to make his nightly trip to a pleasure house, a trip that is typically accompanied by guards. 
You grip the handle of the knife in your pocket as you wait until you finally hear footsteps approaching. 
“Kodo, honey?” You step out from behind the stone column, holding your robe closed as you bat your eyelashes at him. He stumbles around drunkenly until his eyes focus on you. 
You’ve only used your voice for screaming for so long you sound meek, exactly as you want to right now. 
“Wife?”
“I thought maybe you’d like to join me tonight…” You hold a hand out towards him, putting on a sickly sweet tone of innocence. His mouth twists into a grin. 
“I knew you’d come around eventually.”
He doesn’t question where you’re taking him, he simply follows.
What a joke. 
You pull him up the stairs, you know from hide and seek where to find an empty room so you guide him there in calculated silence until he trips a bit, laughing to himself as he stutters.
“I knew if I got rid of the Mandalorian you’d realize how much better I am than him.” The statement doesn’t sit right with you and he can see it on your face, even in his drunken state he can sense your confusion. 
You both stop, you’re above him on the stairs as you turn and stare into his eyes.
“You- you knew?”
He simply nods, that sickening smile of his is plastered on his face. His icy blue eyes shimmer with delight. 
“How long?”
“When Leo told me I remembered everything. That little altercation in the hall when your boy knocked me out came right back to me, from there it wasn’t hard to figure out.” Your eye twitches as he speaks.
He knew you loved him and he took him from you anyway.
Any hesitations you had are gone as you nod, pulling him onward until you reach the large vacant tower room. He’s so drunk you decide to just drop the voice, pointing at a spot on the floor. 
“Lay down.” You mumble, reaching into your pocket once more.
He eagerly does as he’s told, laying down on the cold stone, you take a deep breath, in one swift motion you grab your knife, holding it behind your back as you toss your robe aside. He gives you a toothy grin as you ever so slowly walk to him, standing above him before sitting, straddling his waist. 
You look him up and down, one last time. 
Your loving husband. 
One of his hands plays with the blue lace of your nightie as you collect yourself. You look up at the ceiling briefly. 
I’m sorry. 
Not for Kodo, but for Din. This is exactly what he didn’t want you to do. 
You aren’t a killer. And you aren’t hateful, but a person can only be pushed so far before something breaks. 
Be smart. 
You think of Din’s note one last time before you bring the blade out in front of you and slam the blade into Kodo’s chest. 
He makes a sickly wet sound, coughing as he stares at you in shock.
You remove the knife, the hot steel cauterizes his wounds, there isn’t so much as a drop of blood as your face twists with fury and you bring it down again into his stomach now. 
How dare he look surprised by any of this. 
After what he took from you? He deserves galaxies worse. 
So you remove the knife. 
And you stab him again.
And again,
and again,
and again,
and again,
and again.
Until there is no more shocked look on his face. You don’t have a snarky remark or a statement to commemorate your revenge, you’re all used up at this point, all you have is this, this stabbing motion. 
He didn’t even have a chance to fight back.
You crawl off of his body, sitting on the stones as you toss the knife to the side, waiting for a rush of euphoria. 
But it never comes. 
It doesn’t feel as good as you thought it would. 
Staring down at Kodo’s lifeless body. You let yourself crumble. Collapsing down onto the floor, gasping for air as you sob. 
This was never going to bring him back. 
You lay there on your hands and knees for quite some time, just wailing, because what else are you supposed to do right now? You realize far too late that this was never an act of malice, some demented and shattered part of you thought that this would somehow bring him back, that it would give you peace. 
They won’t execute you. 
You planned this exactly so they wouldn’t.
Kodo didn’t tell anyone about your relationship with Din in much detail, not enough for them to assume that you could be with child. Everyone will assume that it’s Kodo’s. They won’t kill you, they can’t. 
Not if they think you’re carrying Kodo’s child. Now that Kodo’s dead, there’s no one to tell the royal family that you never consummated your marriage, your child is the most well protected person on the planet. The future monarch. It’s almost funny, you haven’t permitted yourself to think about the stirring within you as a child until just now, in this moment of weakness. A child, your child. 
Who will most likely grow up without a mother because of the decisions you've made today.
You bite your fist, swallowing a scream as you sit back on your heels. 
Your child will never know how loved they were. Your little one will never get to sit beside their mother while their father teaches them to sew. You put your head in your hands as you wail, no longer caring who hears. Your fate is sealed, what does it matter? 
You don’t turn when you hear someone coming up the stairs. When they pull you into their arms you try uselessly to shove them away. Your vision is blurry and filled with tears as you stare up at the unfamiliar figure now holding you. They rub your back, drawing swirls and stars against your spine as they pull you closer. 
“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” They mumble into your hair. You dry your eyes hastily on your sleeve, confused by the voice you’re hearing, it’s painfully familiar, on instinct you wrap your arms around their torso, pulling yourself into their lap as you both sit on the floor beside Kodo’s body. “You’re okay, I’m here.”
“I’m- I’m sorry.” You whisper against the stranger's shirt. You knew you weren’t hateful. You’re certain of it now because even though he took quite literally everything from you, you still feel bad when you look at Kodo. 
A large hand cups your face, pulling you back to their chest so you can’t see the corpse anymore. 
“I didn’t mean it- I- I didn’t mean to kill him. Well I did but I just-” You begin to ramble as a fresh flood of tears begin sliding down your cheeks. 
“Hey- hey it’s okay. I know you didn’t mean it. We gotta get you cleaned up, okay? I’ll take care of this, I’ll fix it.” Their arms tighten around you, giving you a reassuring squeeze. You finally find the courage to look at your companion and it takes a moment for you to even realize who you’re looking at. 
New Leo. 
Why would he help you? You treat him like shit. When you look at him he looks like he’s about to cry and for the first time since Din was taken from you drop the walls you’ve put up and you let yourself feel bad for him. You show an ounce of kindness to him because in all honesty he’s the first person to make you feel safe since the night Din was taken from you. 
A lighthouse while you sail through a storm.
So you hug him. 
You pull yourself closer to him and you offer him a comfort you haven’t known for days.
“I’m sorry… for all of it, but especially the flowers, I should have told you, I just- you wouldn’t let me and the guards wouldn’t let me in without your permission and you just wouldn’t look at me.” He begins to mumble his own apologies, sending a surge of confusion through you. 
You furrow your brows, pulling back once more giving him a perplexed look as you search his nearly black eyes for some kind of answer. 
And it clicks. 
All at once it snaps into place and you want to say his name, so desperately, but you’re terribly afraid of being wrong. 
And then he smiles. A soft smile that makes you feel okay and you don’t even care if you’re wrong and you don’t care if it doesn’t make sense you just have to ask.
“Din?”
a/n : yeah so uhhhhh yeah uhhhh this is the first chapter i've ever written where im actually very fond of the writing and nervous about the plot stuff so im gonna go hide?? and just vanish for a while lol
//
I don't have a tag list anymore !! follow @lincolndjarinnotifs for updates!!
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fakesimp · 6 months
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Fiery Love
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Warning !
Vox Akuma x Reader x Shu Yamino ; The use of Vox's 2.0 and 3.0 fit , Shu's 2.0 fit ; Unestablished Polyamorous Relationship
The world I created in this fic is not canon ! The world takes in the Past timeline !
A/n !
I see some wanted to see me write for these two again ! Yes again, I have wrote about these two in Polyamorous relationship before !
If you're new here, This is the first fic i wrote about them !
➶◜◝➴
One who's afraid of his own sorcery, never trusting his own powers. One who never talked about himself, also avoiding talking about his past.
There is some rumors going around the village said that if you ever went into the forbidden forest, you'll be eaten alive by demons, yokais, evil spirits.
Some said there is a Demon that have inhumane height, big wings, accompanied with a Sorcerer that have a high intelligence of dark magic. Some said that they're both are always together, if you see one, the other is definitely nearby.
And you were quite curious of that, some said it's a myth, some said it's true. You thought that it would be a good idea to see if it's true or not.
Here you are now, walking down the path, bought nothing but yourself and a lantern. You thought you'll just go through this forest for an hour or so before going back to the village, and everything goes according to plan !
Nothing happened,
You did got lost for quite awhile, but you manage to return back to the village in one piece. You're a bit disappointed upon the discovery, nothing happened when you entered the forbidden forest.
So you went to visit again the next day, the same exact hour, and again you walked out still disappointed. Nothing happened, you went on doing it for a whole week, and all of those days you wasted at night only filled with disappointment.
One day, you were having a quite hassle at your workplace. Not only that, even in your household. That is your worst day in the week, you went out to take a breather at night, you didn't even realize where your foot is taking you until you're standing in the middle of an open space in the fortunately familiar forest.
You turned, to see you're surrounded by trees, and trees. Of course, because you're in a forest, until you realized that a path slowly opens before you. The trees moved, opening a path for you leading to a well kept house at the distance. You hesitantly walked down the path, as you get closer, you didn't realize the trees behind you closed the path behind you.
The moon shines bright above you, shining down upon the house and you. Who' standing before the house, entranced by the beauty of the surroundings. Sakura trees bloomed around the house, rocky path before you leading to the sliding door, the side is a small wellspring where people usually wash their hands and mouth for to purify themselves before approaching the shrine.
You can hear the water flowing, the sakura trees rustling against each other. It was so peaceful, it made you don't want to leave this beautiful place.
Until you heard a loud thud behind you, soon followed with a low growl. Your body frozen, refuses to move, your feet refuses to take a step, you slowly turn around to see a tall, large being, staring down at you, his lips parted slightly, emitting smokes, and his large wings flapping slightly on his back made your body shiver.
Your eyes met with the beast, the Demon. It approaches you, oh so slowly. Making you falter, and fell down. Earning another growl from the Demon in front of you, soon you felt your back hit something. You look up to see a figure looming down over you, smiling.
"Well well, an unexpected guest..!" The male with a beautiful, long, raven hair slowly slides over from his shoulder, some hitting your shoulder, he leaned away and whispered an apology for his hair.
"Apologies, my hair is quite a hassle," He started as he kneeled next to you, looking at you curiously. "You know you could've got consumed if I came late" The male with a long raven hair, that have a rather unique iconic yellow hair at the left side.
His eyes are violet, it's so enchanting to stare at. The long raven haired male glanced over at the beast who had stopped moving, 10 feet away from you. "You should thank me for coming at the right moment before you're consumed by him" he chuckled before slowly standing back up again and stared down at you.
The demon took a step next to the long raven haired male, "I believe you already know what we are? Especially from those, rumors going on around your village" His violet eyes stares back into yours. He smiled, his smile is quite unique. It made your heart skipped a beat.
And then realization falls before you, you stared at the large figure behind this beautiful man who have such a long raven hair that's mixed with purple, pink and yellow.
These two are the two figures that the villagers mentioned,
The Demon and The Sorcerer.
"I, I'm sorry for disturbing you two, I," You glanced down upon yourself, "My head was in distraught, I had a bad day today. I didn't even realize where my foot is taking me" You started rambling. The two didn't say anything, they just silently stare at you.
"Shu" You glanced back up, "Huh?" "Shu Yamino, that's my name" He introduced himself. "And this," his hand extended to the side, pointing at the figure near him. "This is Vox Akuma." Shu introduced the other, "We'll let you stay, just for tonight since it's dangerous for someone like you, a human to wander around this forest at night"
Soon, the large figure behind Shu, Vox, slowly getting engulfed by smoke around him. And then when he stepped out, he is a whole different being. His golden eyes pierced into yours, his two horns on his forehead made him look appealing.
"Truly, I would've eaten you up if it was not for Shu stopping me from doing so." Your body shivers when you heard his low husky voice, "Go rest Human, Tomorrow morning you should be already in your room" Vox said before walking pass you, and stopped a few steps behind you.
"Don't think we don't know what you're doing last week" He said before disappearing into the house, Shu who had been standing quietly finally let out a small chuckle. "Apologies, he usually don't act that way, perhaps he just doesn't want to repeat the same incident" He said as he helped you get off from the ground.
"Incident?" The Sorcerer smiled agitatedly, "Whoops, I said too much," he said as he then start walking towards the house, "Come, I'll show you the room you're staying in for the night."
You hesitantly followed Shu, walking down the wooden floors, sometimes it creaked sometimes it doesn't. As you followed him, you noticed that this house is pretty decent, like how houses should normally be.
These type of houses usually would be owned by rich people, but to see such house in the forbidden forest made you wonder, your train of thoughts was come to a stop by a voice coming from the male before you.
"Stay curious, but try not to find out about your curiosity." The Sorcerer turned his head a bit, looking at you over his shoulder, his identic smile appeared once more. "You should be thankful you're alive right now, you could've been a whole feast for us" he chuckled softly at his questionable statement, "O, Okay" You replied, and then Shu slides the door next to him, "Here is your room, do avoid to wander around the house, okay?" He said as he wait for you to step into the room.
"Then again, humans are stubborn, if you want to wander around, go ahead," He said, his violet eyes no longer look friendly, "But this time I do not guarantee your safety." He said before his friendly face appeared again within a blink. "Well then, Goodbye, human" He said as he bow slightly before sliding the door close.
Leaving you alone in the room, it looks pretty cozy, with the table in the middle of the room, and then a vase on it, along with a futon folded up at the corner. The moon shines through the window, making the room look quite. Lonely.
You sat near the window and looked up at the night sky, at the moon who high up in the dark sky. Accompanied by the stars around it,
It's beautiful.
Your thoughts now goes back to those two, The demon and The Sorcerer. They look like they're not quite fond with humans, especially Vox, he seems to despise you.
Shu seems more friendlier, but he, there is something wrong with him that doesn't click right on you. It's like, he is physically there, but also not there.
Your eyes slowly gets drowsy, but before you fell asleep on the window, you get to the futon, opening them, and you just scoot into the futon. The moment your head hits the pillow, you're out cold.
. . .
Birds chirping outside, you opened your eyes to see a familiar ceiling, you looked around.
It's your room.
It's exactly like Vox said, you're now back into your room, you don't know how they did it, but one thing is that, You want to see them again, will fate let you see them again?
Will they let you see them again? Question after question kept on appearing one after another, you want to see them, but do they want to see you?
You sighed at the thought and went on your day with them plaguing your thoughts.
. . .
Night arrives and your stubborn self standing outside the forbidden forest, holding a latern. But before you step into the forest, you heard a familiar voice.
"Foolish human"
"Haha, you're a stubborn one, I thought the warning is enough, don't you value your life?"
You turned to see where the voice coming from, nowhere, and then you look up at one of the trees, you see a familiar raven purple hair dangling, then a violet eyes staring back into yours from the dark.
Then under the tree there's a piercing golden eyes looking back into yours too, but then those eyes slowly turned pink, and then there' smoke emits from the dark.
The familiar large figure looms out from the dark, you didn't realize your hands clenched onto your latern so tightly, "Do you know what you're getting yourself into, human?" The demon's voice growled as he stand tall under the shades.
"No, I don't, or maybe I do" You said as you look at these two who's in the shades, "Turn back, don't make things more difficult than it already is." Shu's enchanting voice demanded, "You wouldn't want to know what's going on inside this forest now" he continued and let out a chuckle.
"Let them be Shu, humans are stubborn, if they want to die then let them die." Vox turned around and walked away, soon Shu jumped down from the tree and stares at you, smiling. Though his eyes isn't.
And then you blinked, and Shu is standing right before you, his face right next to your ears, making your breath hitched. "You are nothing but food to those beings in the forest, if you want to be feasted on that badly then go ahead. Both I and Vox told you to stay away for your own safety." He leaned back a bit, you both stared at each other.
Shu's gloved hand touches your chin, "Someone like you doesn't belong in this hellish place," he whispered, his thumb glaze along the lines of your chin. "But Humans are stubborn by nature, when they want something, they will get them no matter what, no?" He leans dangerously close to your lips.
But then let out a small laugh as he stepped away and walked away from you like he did nothing wrong, leaving you breathless, dumbfounded on the spot.
"If you still insisting on going then go ahead, because this time they're no longer hiding." That is the last thing he said before leaving you alone, you looked around, your legs almost lost it's strength after what the Sorcerer did.
You couldn't forget his scent, he smells rather sweet, and intoxicatingly addictive.
. . .
That night you didn't enter the forest, you turned your back on the forest and walked away, you can't forget what Shu did to you that time.
It plays on loop on your head, he was so close to you, you can feel his breath, his scent strokes your nostrils to the addictive amount, his voice sounds enchanting.
Ugh, he is so intoxicating.
. . .
Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months. You didn't visit the forbidden forest like how they wanted you to be, but you'll be lying if you didn't miss them.
One night you went to the forest again, and the same incident happened once more.
"Just when I thought you'll stop coming back forever, of course you're going to return." A familiar husky voice echoed through your eardrums, you tilt your head to the owner of the voice. "Vox.." You whispered his name, as you do he walked out from the shades, taking a few steps before stopping a few feet before you.
His golden eyes bore into yours, he then approached you, closer, and closer. To the point he's so close to you that his figure is looming over you, "Leave," he started.
"While I asked nicely." His eyes soften a slightly, but it disappears as quick as it appeared. "Why do you keep insisting on me leaving, Vox?" You asked him, he' silent. He didn't say anything, instead he leaned his face closer to yours.
"You really want to waste your life? "
His golden eyes stared into yours, filled with so many emotions. He then take a step back and walked away, "We're just trying to not let you waste your life as food, but of course your kind doesn't care and proceed on coming here and become free food to feast on." He said before stopping on his tracks, he looked over his shoulder, "Though if you do want to be food that bad," he trailed off "I could feast on you, and you won't be feeling any pain."
"Ha, how ridiculous Vox" "Tsk, well nevermind then" Vox sighed softly as he eyed Shu who innocently walked out from the dark, smiling at you and then him, "Well, it's nice to see you again human, I thought you're already getting feasted on" he laughed softly.
"It's good to see you still in one piece" He glanced at you, "Though, you came at the worst timing" Shu said as she shove his hands into his sleeves, "Tonight is Red Moon, they're going out to find humans to feast on" he said casually, both his violet eyes glistens under the moonlight, along with Vox's golden eyes staring at yours.
"Well? Do you want to be feasted on? Or do you still want to live?"
"Turn and walk away if you still want to live, or You will be eaten alive right here and now"
"Haha, that sounds so brutal Vox, you could've been a bit more subtle about it"
"Hmh, ..So, what do you choose?"
But before you could have a moment to think, you hear footsteps coming closer to the three of you, all of you turned to see who's approaching.
"Oh.. Uninvited guests" Shu said as he took a step before you, shielding you away from the 'uninvited guests'. Vox at the other hand summoned his katana, "Well I have no plan on sharing." The demon said as he stared at the distance, "Haha, well at least you're sharing with me?"
Both of them talked about sharing and you have no idea what exactly are they talking about, both of them then stopped talking and look back at you.
Shu's violet eyes narrowed, as he smiled at you.
Vox's golden eyes coldly stares into yours, looking at you, like, you're his prey.
Oh dear, what's going to happen to you?
©fakesimp . 2023
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Splitting this into parts, how are you guys feeling? Yaminions? Kindreds? How's the fic? You like it? And boy I did not intend to write the fic this long lol.
|| Part 2 ->
A/n !
Reblogs and Comments are always appreciated !
Get this fic to 300 notes, and I'll write the second part.
517 notes · View notes
bri-sonat · 3 months
Text
Bloodied Waters
Pairing: Brienne of Tarth x Reader
Warnings: mentions of blood and slight violence, a tiny bit of angst, fluff, non-sexual nudity and intimacy. Slight canon deviation.
Synopsis: When Brienne returns covered in traces of battle, you give her comfort and safety - and a nice bath.
A/N: This has been sitting finished since July but I haven't wanted to post it for many reasons. For some reason I don't hate this fic anymore so I am taking the opportunity now so I can't revert back to my original state, lol. As per usual, English isn't my first language and all that.
Thank you to @daydream-cement for being the most supportive and encouraging friend I could ask for, and for reading this and giving me your opinion months ago.
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Two months.
It had been two months since you had seen her last. Since she rode off to fight Gods knows what battle. In this time of uncertainty, you couldn’t be sure where she was sent off to anymore.
The imminent threat of the Night King and his army breaching The Wall weighed heavily on the land and it resulted in Brienne being away more than usual – but she had never been away this long.
You couldn’t be blamed when you began to wonder if she was still alive after the six-week mark and she hadn’t returned or been heard from. No one had from the company she had departed with. And when it hit eight weeks, your worries didn't get any better. 
So, they were all either dead or still fighting for their lives. Those were the only reasons your stress-ridden brain could come up with.
If she had been removed from this mortal realm, she would have died alone. Alone somewhere. Probably in immense pain.
Even if it hurt you to even entertain the thought, you hoped her possible death had been fast. That way, she didn’t have to suffer.
Your heartbreaking thoughts were cut short by the sound of a horn, signaling that the group had returned and to open the gate. From your window, you could see a band of people on horses, three of them unmanned, which made you feel uneasy.
It was usually easy to spot Brienne in a crowd of people, but her straw-blonde hair was nowhere to be seen. The pit in your stomach that had been growing over the past weeks seemed to drop when you couldn’t find her.
Maybe the chance of her losing in battle was more probable than you had been willing to accept.
But until someone explicitly told you that she had perished in battle, you would have hope for her survival.
You witnessed as the gate was opened and the warriors rode in - the people and horses disappearing from view before the gate was once again closed.
Staring out the window and waiting for a knock on your door was only going to drive you mad, so you decided to pass the time in some other way.
Scurrying about your room, you tried finding something to do but restlessness got the better of you, and you soon found yourself waiting for that knock on the door that could either be the face of your love, or the worst possible news.
After fifteen minutes of silence, you started to land in the fact that she may not have returned, and the person who knew about your relationship was slowly making their way to your room to deliver the bad news.
You couldn’t take the agonizing pain so you left your room to venture for some hot water – hoping a nice hot bath might allow your tense body to relax. If even in the smallest bit.
When you returned to your room, hot water acquired, you were surprised to discover that there was no one waiting outside your door, nor had you met someone on your walk to or from. It was strangely silent.
The bath basin sitting in the adjacent room to yours looked more and more inviting by the second and you sprang into action before the water in your hands turned cold.
Pouring the large water cans with hot water into the vessel, you pondered how it would be to bathe with Brienne. How it would be to have such calm intimacy with the person you loved more than anything in this world.
The thought made you the tiniest bit sad and even if you wanted to keep the image in your head for as long as you could, you knew it was better to think about something else for now until you knew that the fantasy was a possibility.
You filled the rest up with the cold water from the large bucket next to the basin so it would even out to a nice lukewarm temperature.
Just as you were about to take your clothes off, a knock on the door disrupted your actions and you nearly ran to the door to open it – desperate for any piece of information regarding Brienne.
When you opened the door, you were met by a face you knew all too well, only this time, it was covered in dried blood, grime, and dirt. “Brienne, oh, Gods.”
You reacted quickly by ushering her inside your room and closing the door after her. She didn’t say a single word and her eyes were empty – apathetic and void of any emotion.
You didn’t know if the blood was hers or not but there was only one way to find out.
Carefully, you sat her down on your bed and undid her sword belt and fur cape before you began removing each piece of her dark armor, sneaking eventual glances at her emotionless face, your heart breaking each time she did not even make a move to look at you. She just stared dead ahead.
Never had you seen her like this before.
When all her armor was discarded, you were hit with the stench of iron, sweat, and mud – the smell of what you assumed to be battle. You moved your attention to her gambeson and gloves, working fast to get everything off to assess her condition – if she had been injured or not.
You remained quiet throughout your entire undressing of your girlfriend, if Brienne wanted to talk – she would. You assumed she needed some silence to process everything and just enjoy being back in a safe location.
The moment her gambeson and the rest of her clothing had been removed - you took hold of her dirty hands to guide her up to a standing position. You raked your eyes over her body and found nothing except for more blood, most likely having run down her neck and invaded the skin protected by the armor.
“The blood is not mine,” Brienne croaked out. The sudden noise made you jolt, your eyes snapping up to meet her desolate ones.
“Right...,” you responded, her statement confirming that she was not wounded in a way that would warrant blood. With your worries settled, you guided her to the other room. You had poured the bath for yourself, but she needed it more.
Slowly, she stepped in, her hand in a steadfast grip in yours as she descended into a sitting position until her entire body was underneath the surface – releasing a sigh once the water enveloped her.
You let go of her hand and grabbed a bar of soap sitting on the table next to the basin and she let the hand you had previously been holding fall under the water as well.
Brienne sat in the basin, staring into nothingness – her breathing slow. You rolled up your sleeves, kneeled next to the tub, and submerged the bar in the warm water before you began gently cleaning her skin from the stench and the mud and blood that tainted her soft skin.
Starting with her face and neck, you used your hands to gently apply the soap and you observed the suds turning a brownish red as it mixed with the blood and dirt on her skin.
As your eyes scanned her face, you noticed that her disheveled blonde hair had also been soiled by blood spatter and dried mud. 
“Close your eyes.” It was a gentle command, and Brienne complied – closing her eyes without question.
Using a cloth, you dunked it in the water and allowed it to soak before wringing it out – bringing it to Brienne’s face to wipe away the lather. You dipped it in the water again to rinse it, but you caught a glimpse of it before you did – the color of the froth alien on the white fabric.
With her face now clean, you moved on to her hair. 
Normally you’d utilize your own mixed hair wash for this, but you didn't wish to leave Brienne in her current state to go and collect it. Soap would have to do.
Your movements were slow and calculated as you pressed gently on the bottom of her chin, signaling for her to lean her head back. Brienne complied and tilted her head back and you maneuvered yourself so you could have the perfect view needed to wash her dirtied hair.
Utilizing one of the jugs you had carried the water with, you dipped it in the water to fill it up and used it to wet Brienne’s straw blonde hair, going over it once or twice before you were confident that all the strands were permeated.
You grabbed the bar of soap once again and dragged it against the palm of your hand – getting a decent amount on it before placing the bar to the side and rubbing your hands together. Tenderly, you started massaging the soaping into her blonde curls and scalp, making sure that all the dirt and blood loosened from her locks.
Brienne hummed as your hands mildly rubbed her head – adoring the alleviating feeling it gave her. The feeling of comfort and security. Her eyes were still closed, and she could feel the corners of her lips twitch the tiniest bit as you pressed a kiss to her forehead before moving to fill the jug with water to rinse the soap out of her hair.
You worked softly and slowly when you combed your fingers through her locks – pouring the water over her hair as you did, making sure that all the lather was washed away.
With her hair, face, and neck clean – it was time to wash the rest of her body.
You moved away from the head of the basin and switched to sit at the side of it again, kneeling next to it. You grabbed the bar of soap and immersed your hand into the water that was starting to turn red at this point and started to cautiously drag the bar across Brienne’s chest – removing all the dried blood and dirt.
Whilst one of your hands was in the water, the other one rested on the rim of the basin, right next to Brienne’s ear, and before you knew it, you felt her leaning her head against it. A small smile started playing on your lips at the intimate position you had found yourselves in.
You had never experienced this type of closeness with your knight before – it was incredibly heart-warming and you wouldn’t complain if you found yourself in this position again; without the blood and dirt, of course. 
Brienne’s head rested against the back of your hand at the same time as yours worked on washing her arms, hands, chest, stomach – anywhere you had seen dried signs of battle.
You enjoyed every single second of the casual intimacy. The fact that there were still new ways to be so deeply close even after so many months made you incredibly giddy inside even when the situation you discovered it in was somber.
Like it had the entire time, the only thing filling the silence in the room was the splashing of the water as it hit the sides with your hand continuing to move as it scrubbed Brienne’s skin. It remained like that for a very long time until the blonde woman opened her mouth to speak for the second time since she had come home. Your hand that was scrubbing her sides halted briefly before continuing - her voice surprising you. “Thank you.”
“For what?” You couldn’t help but inquire as to why she was thanking you. What you were doing right now only seemed like the most obvious choice. You took care of each other in any way the other person needed, and you were more than happy to offer her this small service.
She was quiet for a few seconds before she spoke again – her voice low, almost like a whisper. “For this... and for giving me a reason to keep fighting. It... It didn’t look very promising for a few moments, and I was... I was harboring the idea that I would never return to you again.”
You leaned forward to press a kiss to Brienne’s forehead as you continued scrubbing her skin beneath the surface of the water. “This is the least I can do for you... you take care of and for me every day. I wanted to return the favor. Thank you for coming back to me. And you’re welcome. I’m glad to provide you with a reason to keep fighting if it’ll bring you back to me each time.”
Brienne hummed and whined slightly when you removed your lips from her skin. To have someone care for her in the way you did made her feel so gleeful and she was so grateful for you and all you did for her. “Still... Thank you.”
“Anything for my knight.” You smiled as you washed her and finished your response – already knowing the next words coming out of her mouth.
The blonde woman chuckled slightly and silently, having had this exact interaction with you many times before. By now, she knew you did it as a way of making her smile and it worked; every single time. “I’m not a knight.”
“To me you are. You’re my knight.” You saw the smile that crept up on Brienne’s lips at hearing your words, even if she had heard them many times before at this point. “Besides, if you were a man, we both know you’d be a knight by now. You have the traits of a knight, so in my eyes, you are a knight. Even if you don’t have the title.”
Brienne adjusted her head to press a kiss to the back of your hand before returning to rest her cheek on it again. “You’re too nice to me. Thank you.”
“I only treat you in the way you deserve to be treated. Not my fault you’re such an incredible person.” You said this in a way that made Brienne smile and blush – something that you did with ease many times over the two years you had known the adorable knight. It only got worse once you began your relationship because it made you able to be more frank with your compliments.
The blonde didn’t offer a response to your words – silence filling the room once again. The way Brienne spoke about the battle, it seemed to have gone bad, so much so that she thought she wouldn’t make it. You knew she would talk to you about it if she needed to and you had no reason to ask but a part of you wondered what happened that caused her to see no hope.
The rest of the bath went by in tranquility, the occasional kiss on Brienne’s forehead and the planting of lips on your hand mixed with the comforting sounds of water making the second part of the experience a very pleasant one.
After helping Brienne out of the now red-stained water and planting her before the burning fire in the other room to dry with a fur wrapped around her, you told her to stay put before running as fast as you could to her room to collect her comb, and dry and clean clothes for her.
You didn't wish to leave her but the clothes she arrived in were bloody and dirty, and you knew Brienne would appreciate the gesture. 
When you returned, she sat with her legs drawn up to her chest with her arms wound around them on the fur you had put on her.
You slowly approached her and sat down next to her – her folded clothes placed on your bed, the comb resting on the pile. “Hi.”
Her skin was dry now. Her hair was still a bit damp but you knew it wouldn’t be long until it was fully dried as well.
Brienne sighed and leaned her head against your shoulder. She stared into the crackling fire – the flames dancing in her beautiful blue eyes. “...Hi.”
“How are you feeling?” You wrapped an arm around her naked form and pulled her close to you. You had missed her so much and you were not ready to let go anytime soon except to get undressed to join her in bed.
“Better now... A little tired.” Brienne hadn’t had a decent night’s sleep in weeks, and she was exhausted at this point. The adrenaline had finally worn off completely and she felt the fatigue creep up on her like she had expected it to once she was back in your safe company.
“It’s getting late... Do you want to go to sleep? I will deal with the water tomorrow.” The sun had started setting as you were washing Brienne and it had been well below the horizon for a while now. You pressed a kiss to the top of the knight’s head and awaited her answer.
“Yes, please.” Brienne sat snuggly in front of the warm hearth, but she knew that it was much nicer to be in your embrace. It was warm, cozy, and oh-so-comfortable.
“Okay... Let’s get you covered and tucked in.” You stood up and began removing the things scattered about the bed. Brienne’s discarded armor, her dirty clothes, her cape, and her sword were swept off the mattress and placed on a round table close to the hearth. Her clean clothes and comb remained on the bed, and you squatted down next to her to lay a hand on her shoulder. “Do you want to get dressed?”
Brienne leaned her head against your hand and closed her eyes. “No. I want to feel you pressed against me entirely. I don’t want clothing to restrict me from sensing all of you.”
You almost melted from her sweet words. You rubbed your thumb against her skin, the pad of it grazing against the tip of one of her scars. “Alright, my sweet Brienne.”
The knight lifted her head from your hand and you slid it down her arm – leaving it to rest on her bicep. You gently rubbed it up and down as she opened her eyes and stood up.
You swiftly removed the pile that was on the bed and placed them on the table as well. You would have to comb her hair tomorrow instead. 
With the bed empty, Brienne could pull off the furs and crawl in under them – covering her bare body and providing her with warmth and comfort for the first time in weeks.
She laid on her back as she watched you undress, folding your clothes and placing them on top of your trunk.
You finally crawled into bed and cuddled up next to Brienne, her skin incredibly soft. She hummed as you slung one arm and leg over her torso, bare skin against bare skin, and rested a hand on your thigh.
Her other arm went around your shoulders and pulled you closer – your head resting on her chest.
Her rhythmic heartbeat was a consistent reminder that she was indeed alive and still with you. After two months of being apart, the whole situation felt imaginary, but her steady heartbeat let you know that it was real – that she was indeed with you. “I can hear your heartbeat.”
Brienne’s hand on your thigh rested securely and her thumb drew soft lines across your skin. She smiled at your words as she kept her eyes closed to invite slumber. “It’s beating because and for you.”
Her words caused you to pull yourself even closer to her, which was impossible to do at this point. A smile and a blush crept up on your face, she always said the most adorable things and you had no idea what you did to deserve her love, but you were so thankful for her. “You’re sweet. I love you so much.”
Brienne chuckled quietly and you could tell she was close to falling asleep by her voice. “You bring out that side in me... what can I say? I love you, too. Thank you for being here when I returned.”
“I will always be here when you return,” you whispered. You were starting to feel the weeks of worried sleep catch up to you by now and you were more than ready to finally fall asleep in her embrace once again.
The only response Brienne gave was a hum and it fell silent after that.
You heard the knight’s breathing even out after a few minutes, and it signaled that she had fallen into a slumber that you hoped was a deep and restful one. You could only imagine the conditions she has been having to sleep in, and you couldn’t see them being comfortable.
You listened to her breathing and heartbeat for a few more seconds before sleep claimed you as well. Now back with a safe Brienne, you knew that you’d sleep incredibly well. You always did with her.
When you awoke the next morning, Brienne would kiss you all over to make up for two months of being away from one another. But that was up to you in the future to find out. Until then, you were more than happy to finally be with her again, and you remained clinging to your knight all night long.
------
taglist: @na-shoba, @pastanest, @the-fuck-do-i-know, @christies-fleur, @idontlikepexple, @lord6-6fandom, @sapphicmitski (can't tag you for some reason)
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nomazee · 2 months
Text
keep my blankets warm and my name in your mouth
after a night of soaring through belobog's liquor, you finally face the consequences of it on the floor of your hotel room. thankfully, dan heng has experience with taking care of idiots (i.e. you)
dan heng x gn reader — drunkenness, sweet and sappy and sarcastic, dan heng is probably ooc, reader is trailblazer but this is set vaguely in canon & lore doesn't matter, stupid people who love each other but never say it, are they dating or are they toeing the line of cohabitation in the middle of a hotel room?
sequel here
notes: oh gawsh hey guys... yeah yeah it's been forever since i posted but i giggled at all the requests i miss and then instead of doing those i wrote this, but TRUST i am getting back to all of you in a timely manner i love you all thank you so much for sticking with me, i'm coming out with a follower event once i hit 1k (soon) so be excited! love you guys and enjoy
—°+..。*゚。*゚+.*.。.—
Dan Heng is an awful caretaker, really, and you should’ve known this because of his deadpan and often awkward nature. It just never really occurred to you until he’s truly saddled with taking care of a living, breathing thing—i.e., you, drunk and vomiting into a trash can after a spree through Belobog’s bars. 
In your defense, having no memories means having no experiences to your name (other than everything you’ve been through on the Express so far, which is maybe more near-death experiences than you’d like to have), and you heard that being drunk was just something everybody experiences at least once. 
Then, Pela texted you that one time asking for quick tips to sober up, and it dawned on you that you don't even know what that feels like, and then—who cares, really, you don’t have half a mind to think of your tragic pre-drunk backstory when you’re trying not to die of embarrassment as Dan Heng maneuvers you in a way that won’t get vomit on your clothes. 
The cold tiles of the Goethe Hotel en suite bathroom aren’t enough to bring you to full awareness, so you let Dan Heng ragdoll you into kneeling over the trash can and pull any dangling accessories away from your, um, line of fire. 
“Why would you guys let me do this?!” you wail in disbelief, trying to hold back a mouthful of bile but ultimately failing as you cough into the bin again. You’re truly betrayed at the thought that your closest friends wouldn’t warn you of things like alcohol poisoning, and pacing yourself, and how many drinks is too many drinks. 
“I didn't let you do anything,” your friend retorts, because he’s evil and mean and awful at comforting you, “I told you it would be a bad idea. You’re the one that still went out.” 
“Did I puke in front of everyone?” 
Dan Heng pauses, which is always a bad sign. It means he’s thinking, really thinking about what to say. “At the very least, you puked in the snow and not inside the restaurant.” 
A desperate wailing noise escapes you yet again. Life is cruel, and Dan Heng is crueler. He should’ve told a sweet little white lie and you would’ve been none the wiser and a lot less mortified. “Himeko laughed so hard when we found you that Welt had to make her leave.” 
“Just kill me,” you whisper into the trash can, full of your hopes and dreams and the remnants of your dinner and drinks. “I can’t go back to the Express. Execute me and give me a gentle death.” 
“No need to be dramatic,” he says, annunciating his words in that odd little way he does, and it makes you want to kiss him and read a dictionary to you, cover to cover. “You need to drink water, and then brush your teeth. I don’t trust you showering right now so you have to wait until the morning.” 
“Oh, Dan Heng,” you keen, with the grief of a spouse watching their partner go off to war, “you don’t even want to wash my hair for me?! You just think I’m— I’m a drunken slob!” 
“Be quiet,” he commands through his teeth, embarrassment warming him up—you can feel it, the way the tips of his fingers go a little bit warm from where they rest on your shoulder and the side of your face. “You— I don’t think that. You need to brush your teeth.” 
You definitely are not brushing your teeth tonight. You tell Dan Heng as much but he just rolls his eyes and compromises with a travel-sized bottle of mouthwash that he pulls from the cabinet under the sink. He’s so prepared. Or maybe that’s just the hotel staff. Regardless. 
You rinse your mouth out once you’re fine enough to let Dan Heng pull you up to your feet and rest you against the counter of the sink. He has to remind you multiple times to not swallow the mouthwash, and you bat at him childishly for thinking you’d ever do such a thing—except, you definitely would have drinken down an entire mouthful if he didn't say anything. You can’t bear to look at your reflection in the mirror. You just pray to whatever Aeon is listening that there’s no awful stains on your clothes, and that you don’t smell so terrible that Dan Heng goes running the minute he lets go of your arm. 
“Where’s March?” you whine out as he leads you from the bathroom to the main hotel room, trying to gently set you down on your bed but giving up once you immediately fall into it like an ungraceful rock. “She would be so much nicer. You’re mean. Do I smell bad?” 
“I’m not mean,” he tells you, sure of himself and the twist of his mouth as he avoids looking you right in the eyes. “You don’t smell. You need to go to bed. And lay on your side.” Petulantly, and not without some kicks of your legs and flails of your arms, you find yourself situated under the sheets of the hotel bed, sock somehow off your feet now as Dan Heng pulls the blankets right up to your shoulders. 
“I’m on my side now. Do I get a reward?”
“Why would you need a reward?” 
A disgruntled tsk escapes you and you look up at Dan Heng with an exasperated expression. It’s pitiful enough to guilt him into kneeling down beside your bed so that he’s at eye level with you. “Because I went through so much tonight,” you slur out, words starting to mix with each other as a result of your remaining drunkenness and the exhaustion of the night hitting you. “I’ll take a, um— a gold star, or something.” 
“I can give you a cup of water in the morning.” 
Another dreadful wail escapes you. You’ve never faced evil more potent than Dan Heng, and by the stupid twinge of a smile on his face, he knows what he’s doing. You hate how endearing he is, and how he dangles little treasures like this in front of you. You’re brought back to the heat of his fingers from earlier, the gentle touches he left on your shoulders as he let you puke your guts out without even flinching. As much as you joke, you know Dan Heng’s kindness comes from a lack of evil. Comes from a supporting weight against your arms, comes from travel-size mouthwash, comes from staying in your hotel room until you fall asleep and double-checking that you’re on your side. 
In the morning, you’ll take the cup of water, and you’ll take him out for breakfast, too.
—°+..。*゚。*゚+.*.。.—
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dotster001 · 11 months
Text
Quiet End
A/N: Your first non canon, custom content end is here! I've tagged everyone from the of tag list, and everyone who voted for this particular end. If you wanna add your vote for the next one, you can do so in the comments here.
Chapters: Part One Part Two Part Three Choose Another ending
You have to do this! It's all you've been talking about for a week!"
"I just can't!"
Idia was all dressed in a suit and bow tie, but stubbornly standing outside the door to the restaurant. Ortho gave him a pleading look.
"Idia! Come on! Pull it together! You'll always regret it if you don't go in there!"
As Idia was about to send out another string of curses, when an angry Grim, wearing a bow tie, and holding a clipboard, slammed open the door and stomped over to Idia.
"Shroud, pull yourself together or, I swear to the seven, Ashengrotto and I will have a reconciliation, and you'll never have another chance with Y/N!"
With that shout out of his system, he stormed back into the restaurant, probably to try and tell the band and you that "your date" was still coming.
Idia was still frozen, but now it wasn't just out of social anxiety, it was the anxiety that if he blew tonight, he blew any chance of future nights with you.
"Okay, that's it," Ortho said, pushing Idia.
"No…"Idia said through gritted teeth.
"Initiating thrusters," Ortho said, and Idia heard the thrusters kick in, and felt Ortho's pushing get significantly stronger.
"No, no no!"
Once Ortho had pushed him through the door, he let him go, and escaped back out, leaving Idia to make eye contact with you and the band. A smile bloomed across your face, and you waved at him.
Idia took a steadying breath, and robotically walked over to your table, taking a seat.
"Sorry I'm late," he muttered.
"It's totally fine! I'm just happy that you're my date. The last date Grim set me up on was with Azul, and, well, I'm sure you heard how that went."
Idia nodded. The entirety of NRC had heard the story of how Grim had been roped into a contract with Azul, so that Azul could date you. Only a select few knew the truth, though.  Azul had begun construction on a second branch, which meant his income was slightly lower this quarter. And Grim wasn't that good at business math. Which meant Idia was in.
"You're happy it's me?" He asked, unable to hold eye contact with you.
"I mean, yeah. Of course I'm happy it's you! I like you. Quite a lot," you grinned, and his hair turned a deep red as he buried himself in his hoodie like a turtle.
As if the moment couldn't get anymore overwhelming, you looked over your shoulder at Grim, who was yelling at the singer in the band, and then leaned in enough that he could deeply inhale your scent.
"Wanna get outta here?"
….
The two of you were quietly walking along campus. Neither of you spoke, but neither of you needed too. It was a comfortable silence.
At length, Idia muttered," I quite like you, too."
You looked startled, but then smiled happily.
"I'm so happy, Idia. Thank you."
"Why? I'm just a loser otaku, with freaky blue hair…"
"Sevens, Idia! You're sweet, you're smart, you're funny, and despite how you feel, you're quite hot. Like that jawline could cut glass, dude."
He looked at you, not convinced.
"My god, I have to do everything around here," you said with a groan, before grabbing his face and kissing him.
His eyes widened in shock, but as he watched, you seemed to be enjoying the kiss. So he closed his eyes, and just took you in, letting the moment be.
"Y/N! Shroud!" 
You separated, and he couldn't stop himself from chasing your lips, until he realized that the angry sound was Grim.
"Both of you skipped out on your rather expensive date, so I just had to pay the bill. I expect rapid reimbursement."
You raised an eyebrow at Grim, then rolled your eyes.
"Whatever, Grimmy. Your money comes from me anyway."
"Don't sass me! This has been a rather stressful evening! We're going home, and neither of you gets to see each other until you've learned your lesson."
He stormed off, and you made to follow, but not before leaning in to Idia and whispering, "Let's do this in your room next time."
His heart was so full as he watched you leave, a dreamy sigh on his lips.
....
Tag list-@shytastemakerthing @stygianoir @leonia0 @lleoll @eccedentesiast-sapphic @supertmntgirl @cxsmicdustdreams @aethermostbeloved @krystalkiller25 @asmallbean3 @theneurodivergentdummy @candlewitch-cryptic @smilingfox22-blog @phantomgaming1920 @the-dumber-scaramouche @noidonothavetimeforthis @bontensbabygirl @xxoomiii @somany-fandoms-solittle-time @bre99 @stupidsimp @sus0daddy @a-small-tyrant @imlost-sendhelp @mizukiblogs @i-like-forgs @astral-ami @homestuckotaku
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storiesforallfandoms · 4 months
Text
santa's sister in law ~ bernard the elf;the santa clause
word count: 4292
request?: no
description: in which he is adamantly against the in laws coming to the north pole, until he meets santa's sister in law
pairing: bernard the elf x female!human!reader
warnings: christmas fluff, sylvia sucking a little bit but that's just canon
masterlist (one, two, three)
Merry Christmas everyone! 🎄
a special christmas gift for @omeletdreamer 😌
Tumblr media
Bernard was firmly against Carol's family coming to the North Pole. He liked Carol, don't get him wrong. She was a fantastic Mrs. Claus, and he loved her idea to start an elf school at the Pole. He understood that it was hard to adjust to life at the Pole, especially while she was pregnant. But bringing outsiders there was a big no-no. They were already pushing things by letting Laura, Neil, and Lucy in on the secret of Santa.
But all of his protests fell on deaf ears. Santa wanted Carol to have her family while he was going to be busy, and the other elves just wanted Carol to be happy. It was a thousand against one. So, Santa got into his sleigh and flew to get Carol's parents while the elves fixed up the Pole to look like Canada.
"This is never going to work," Bernard said to Curtis. "There's no way they're going to think this is Canada. Even if they believe these ridiculous store signs, they'll never believe Canada is inhabited by a bunch of children."
"Can you not be so negative for once?" Curtis asked. "It'll be fine."
"We are seriously pushing it with how many people know about the Pole and Santa. You can't blame me for being stressed out over it."
"Everything will be fine, Bernard. We have a plan. We got this."
Bernard huffed a sigh and walked away. He was tired of being brushed off like this. He didn't become head elf for nothing. He knew what he was doing. If only someone would just listen to him.
As he was walking away, he heard something in the distance. He looked up to see Santa's sleigh breaching through the entrance to the Pole. He couldn't see them yet, but he imagined Carol's parents in there, asleep from Sandman's magic, expecting to wake up in "Canada". He cringed to himself. There's really no going back now.
"I need a hot cocoa," he muttered to himself.
The kitchen elves were busy baking away when Bernard walked in. Carol had told them her mom's favorite cookies so they were hard at work making a batch to welcome Mrs. Newman. They were wearing comically large chef's hats pulled down to cover their pointy ears, which made Bernard glad his hair was long enough to do that naturally.
"Hi Bernard," Abby said, giving him a bright smile upon noticing him. "Want a hot cocoa?"
"I'd love one, Abby," he responded, sitting down at one of the tables.
She rushed off to make it for him. He picked up a cookie from a plate in the middle of the table to eat while waiting. Abby returned with his hot cocoa. He blew on it, disturbing the steady steam coming from the drink. He hoped that escaping to the kitchen would give him some time to prepare for Carol's parents.
He was taking his first sip of his hot cocoa when the kitchen doors opened again and in walked Santa, Mrs. Claus and her family in tow. Bernard nearly choked on his drink.
"And here's our kitchen," Santa was saying. "Oh, and Bernard's here too! Bernard is my, uh, he's my...assistant."
Bernard tried not to roll his eyes at the title.
He reluctantly stood and plastered a smile on his face. "Hi, nice to meet you...eh."
Carol's dad shook his hand while her mom pulled him in for an embrace. Bernard wasn't prepared for a third person to approach; a young woman with a smile so beautiful it left him speechless.
"This is my sister," Carol said. "We didn't know she was coming too."
"I'm (Y/N)," the woman said. "Mom and dad mentioned they were coming for a visit, so I asked Scott if it was alright for me to tag along."
"Of course it would be alright!" Sylvia cut in. "Scott's already had Carol from us for so long, he'd never say no to bringing Carol's loving sister with us to finally see her again."
Sylvia had a smile on her face but there was venom in her words. (Y/N) cringed and tried to ignore her mother's comment. "It's really lovely here so far. I'm glad I could come."
Bernard was still tongue tied. He kept opening and closing his mouth like an idiot trying to figure out something to say. (Y/N) was watching him, waiting, while Scott and Carol shared an amused look.
"Let's show you the rest of the place," Carol said, putting an arm around her sister. "We'll meet up with Bernard again later."
(Y/N) smiled and waved goodbye as the group left the kitchen. Once they were gone, Bernard felt like he was freed from a spell. He let out a long breath and slumped back down to the table. His hot cocoa had cooled down enough that he finished the rst of it in two gulps.
~~~~~~
Bernard was up late that night doing his rounds of the workshop. All the other elves had left for the night, but Bernard was often the last one up making sure everything was shut down and nothing was left out of place. With the in laws visiting, he was also making sure the workshop was locked up so no one would accidentally wander in and discover everything.
He was preparing to leave when he noticed the door to the kitchen was slightly ajar. He was sure all the baker elves had left for the night, but maybe someone had stayed behind. He poked his head into the room and almost gasped aloud when he saw it was (Y/N) who was leaning against the counter, a mug of hot cocoa in her hands. She was in her pajamas, clearly preparing for bed. Bernard was about to back away and leave her be, until she looked up form her mug and caught him. She smiled and waved to him.
"Good evening, Bernard," she said.
There was no escaping now. He stepped into the kitchen and cleared his throat, trying not to seem as weird as he had earlier. He discretely made sure his ears were tucked away under his hair.
"Hi," he said. Simple, easy. You can't mess up a "hi".
"What are you doing up so late?" she asked.
"I could ask you the same thing."
She giggled. "Touché. I was having trouble sleeping so I decided to come out for a hot cocoa. That nice baker, Abby I think? She offered to make me one before she left. I was told she makes the best hot cocoa in all of the town."
"Oh, she does. She's the one you go to when you want a good hot drink made."
"She works magic, I'm sure."
Bernard tried not to let his smile falter. "You have no idea."
A silence fell over them. (Y/N) softy blew on her hot cocoa before taking a sip from it. A small trail of foam stuck to her upper lip as she pulled her mug away. Bernard couldn't stop himself from chuckling.
"What?" she asked.
"You just...you have something..." He gestured to his top lip.
She ran a thumb along her top lip, only smearing the foam more.
"Here, let me." Bernard reached up and wiped the foam off with his own thumb. He was suddenly very aware of their closeness when he looked into her eyes. Any words he could ever say were stuck in his throat yet again and he could only imagine how insane he looked, staring at her with wide eyes.
"Thank you," she said. "And thank you for having us here, too. I know it's a busy time of year for you guys. We don't mean to impose."
It took Bernard a moment to remember the story they had been telling Carol's parents: that Scott was a toy maker in Canada and that's why he would be so busy this time of year and needed someone to be there with Carol while she was pregnant.
"It's not imposition," Bernard assured her. "If anything, I think it's going to make Sa - Scott feel better to have you guys here for Carol while he's working."
(Y/N) nodded. "It's very nice of him to have us here considering how my parents tend to treat him."
Bernard thought back to the comment Sylvia had made earlier. The strained relationship between Scott and his in-laws wasn't anything new to him. Scott had mentioned it a few times before, most recently when he was voicing his concerns about bringing Bud and Sylvia to the Pole with Bernard in private. It was evident that both Newman sisters also noticed how their parents treated Scott, and it seemed neither of them were too happy with it.
"I understand why mom and dad get upset," (Y/N) continued. "One minute Carol was a proud principal at the local middle school, and then the next thing we know she's writing us to tell us she got married to a guy we've never even heard of and moved off to Canada to be with him. I mean, even I was skeptical then. But when she'd write to me about Scott and about being here, it was clear that she was so happy and she found the man of her dreams. Who are we to judge the quickness that they got married? As long as she's safe and happy, which she clearly is. But mom and dad don't see it that way. Dad is still convinced that Scott is a cult leader who stole Carol away or something."
(Y/N) paused and looked at Bernard. He had been listening as she spoke, just nodding along and not saying a word. She chuckled a little and shook her head. "Sorry, I'm rambling on about my family drama."
"No! It's-it's fine. Trust me, I've heard similar stuff from Sa - Scott."
She gave him a look. "You keep stuttering on Scott's name."
"Yeah."
He couldn't think of a better explanation besides that. He felt an unfamiliar burning sensation in his cheeks. He wasn't sure if it was embarrassment or just from being so close to her that made him feel that way. She giggled, though; a sound more beautiful than any of the twinkling bells that were often heard around the Pole.
"I'm just glad to be here," she said. "And I'm glad mom and dad can be here for when the baby is born. Maybe that will help them be a little less harsh on Scott."
She finished what was left in her mug and looked around the oversized kitchen. When Bernard realized she was probably trying to figure out where to put the dirty mug, he said, "Oh, I can take care of that for you."
"Are you sure?"
"Of course. You're our guest, and I can handle this."
She smiled and passed him the mug. "Well, thanks for talking to me, Bernard. I guess I should try to sleep again."
"Goodnight, (Y/N)."
"Goodnight, Bernard." She started towards the door, but then paused to turn back to him. "I hope you're not too busy tomorrow. I'd like to spend more time with you."
His face was on fire as she left.
~~~~~~
For the first time in his thousands of years as the head elf, Bernard wasn't concerned with his head elf duties. Of course he was still there if Santa needed him, but he decided not to spend the entire day in the factory and to seek out (Y/N) to spend time with her. She was delighted to see him and was more than happy to accept his offer to show her around "Canada" for the day.
This became a regular occurrence for a few days. Bernard would make sure to check in often to see if he was needed, but if he wasn't he was with (Y/N). He would feel bad about taking her away from her time with her family, but it seemed her parents were more concerned with fussing over Carol than they were about all four of them spending time together. And (Y/N) also assured Bernard that she was making time for Carol and her family as well as spending time with him.
Bernard was more than well aware he was falling in love with (Y/N), and he was also more than well aware of how bad that was. Elves falling in love was nothing new; he had officiated quite a few elf weddings in his time. But falling in love with a human was out of the question. Elves were immortal, humans were not. Scott and Carol were different - upon becoming Santa and Mrs. Claus, their aging processes had slowed down considerably. They weren't completely immortal, but they weren't aging as fast as normal humans did. But that wasn't possible for a human that an elf fell in love with. Even if (Y/N) felt the same way towards Bernard, she would still continue to age while he would stay the same for the rest of time.
But he couldn't stop himself. He was falling fast and hard. Carol's due date was creeping closer, and once it came it would only be a matter of time before the Newman family would have to go back home, meaning that (Y/N) would leave and likely would not come back. That thought hurt Bernard.
Bernard was approaching where (Y/N) was staying one day when she slipped out of the house instead. He was surprised; she had never left before he had gotten there before.
As he got closer he realized that her face was tearstained.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
(Y/N) jumped and turned to look at him. "Oh, Bernard. Sorry, I didn't see you coming. Nothing's wrong."
He was about to point out that she was very obviously upset over something when the door opened again and Sylvia slipped out. She looked like she was about to say something, but she noticed Bernard and gave him a tight smile, one that he had come to learn was very much her fake smile.
"Hello, Bernard," she said. "I was just having a conversation with my daughter. We were talking about spending the day with Carol. We haven't had an all girls day since we arrived. So, unfortunately, I don't think she'll be able to spend time with you today."
"No mom," (Y/N) said. "I said I would join you later for girls time. Besides, you know Carol has an appointment with the doctor. She won't be ready till later."
Her mother was smiling but her eyes were glaring daggers into the younger Newman girl. (Y/N) held the glare before turning to Bernard and taking hold of his arm. She didn't say anything as she dragged him away. He followed anyways, wanting to get as far away from Sylvia as he could.
"God, I don't understand what is wrong with her," (Y/N) said, letting go of Bernard long enough to wipe the tears from her eyes. "I swear she just doesn't want Carol and I to be happy."
"What was she saying?" Bernard asked.
"Oh, she was going off about the fact that I spend so much time with you. Had her usual rant about Scott taking her precious daughter away from her and dad, and then said she'll be damned if she lets it happen with me too. Basically tried to guilt me into not spending time with you today by saying that Carol was upset that she didn't get to see me much, which I know isn't true because just the other day Carol was saying how happy she was that you and I were getting along."
She shook her head. "I'm so sick of it. It's like she can't wrap her head around the fact that maybe, just maybe, life is so busy here that Carol doesn't always have time to visit. It has nothing to do with Scott being manipulative or a cult leader or whatever conspiracy her and dad have cooked up on a certain day."
Bernard listened in silence. He felt bad that (Y/N) had to have these issues with her mother. Carol was hearing it all now, but he was sure (Y/N) heard much more of it when she was back home with her parents.
None of the Newmans could ever understand the way things were with Carol and Scott. They could never know why things were like this, but they likely wouldn't understand even if they knew.
Unless...
It was an idea that shocked even Bernard that he had it. Head elf of the North Pole, Santa's righthand man himself, considering such a thing? After being so against Carol's family coming to the Pole? It was preposterous. But his brain was so clouded by love for (Y/N) that he wasn't thinking proper.
"Come with me," he said. He didn't wait for an answer, just took hold of her hand and pulled her towards the workshop.
His heart was pounding so hard he could feel it in hips pointed ears. He had to remind himself there was no going back. This was going to be huge, and it could likely get him into a world of trouble.
He opened the doors to the workshop and (Y/N) stepped in. She looked around in awe at the working elves, most of which were not hiding their ears as the workshop was supposed to be off limits to the Newmans. None of them seemed to notice the two of them enter, and if they did, nothing was said.
Bernard watched (Y/N), nervously waiting for her reaction.
"Is this...what I think it is?" she asked him. "No, it can't be. I must be dreaming. I fell and hit my head and now I'm in a coma having a very vivid dream that all of these small people who are supposed to be Canadians have pointed ears like they're elves."
When she looked over at him, Bernard had taken off his hat and allowed his ears to peak out from under his hair.
"I've lost it," she decided.
"You haven't," he assured her. "All of this is real. It's why Carol hasn't been able to visit as much, or why you couldn't visit until now. Look, there's so much to know about all of this. So much that I want to tell you but technically I can't because there are strict rules about humans knowing about the North Pole."
(Y/N) had another quick moment of shock that she was able to very quickly recover from. "Rules that you're currently breaking by showing me...Santa's workshop. By admitting that you're an elf, these are all elves...oh my God, my sister is Mrs. Claus."
"It is all very complicated," he said. "But you deserve to know that Carol is truly happy here. She's not being held against her will, Santa isn't manipulative or holding her captive. He loves her so much that he risked you and your parents finding out about him - about us - so that all of you could be here for her while she's pregnant."
(Y/N) still seemed to be stunned. She looked around the bustling factory again, her eyes wide with wonder.
"Wait," she said. "But...if you all went through so much to make us think this was Canada, to keep who Scott is a secret...then why are you telling me now?"
Because I love you. Because I want you to stay. Because I want to be with you more than anything, even though I know that will never happen.
"Because I want you to know the truth," he replied. "About all of this. About...about me."
She was looking at him. He didn't know what else to say, so he just looked back. He waited for an answer. He willed her to say something, anything.
She didn't say anything, though. Instead, she leaned forward and kissed Bernard. It was quick, almost hesitant, and when she pulled away she looked embarrassed.
"Sorry," she said. "I...should I have done that? I should've asked first. Was it okay that I did that?"
He smiled. "It was more than okay."
"Okay. I'm...I'm going to do it again, if that's still okay."
Bernard chuckled and moved in to kiss (Y/N) first. He had only ever kissed one person before - when he was young one of the other elves had gave him a quick peck on the lips and ran away afterwards. Not exactly something glamorous or anything like that. So he was a little worried about whether or not he was a good kisser. Although, something felt so natural about kissing (Y/N), like he could never do it wrong even if he tried.
He paused when he realized a slight hush had fallen over the workshop. He and (Y/N) pulled away to see that all the working elves had stopped what they were doing to look at the two of them.
"Back to work!" Bernard commanded. They all quickly fell back into what they had been doing before. "Bunch of gossips, all of them. Everyone in town will know about this by nightfall."
"I don't blame them. I'd assume it's not every day that they see an elf kissing a human."
He chuckled. "No, I guess not."
They decided to step out of the workshop to talk more in private. (Y/N) looped her arm through Bernard's as they walked, a gesture that suddenly felt much more intimate than it had before.
"I guess it goes without saying that I can't tell anyone about this," she said. "Not even my parents."
"No. Which I know is a big ask, but we can't have the secret of Santa going around," Bernard explained.
"Not like anyone would believe me. They'd think I was crazy if I went home talking about how my brother in law is Santa and how I started crushing on one of his elves. They'd sent me to an institute for sure."
Bernard smiled at her word choice. So she had liked him this whole time, too. Had it been obvious? Or had she been trying to contain it just as much as he did?
"How...would things work...for us then?" she asked.
It was the question he was dreading. The one he continued to ask himself despite knowing the answer to: it wouldn't. He couldn't let (Y/N) hold on to him when she left the Pole. She'd likely never see him again, which was for the best.
Seeing the look on his face, (Y/N) stopped. "No, do not tell me it's not going to work."
"It can't work, (Y/N). There's too much complications between a human and an elf being romantically linked. It's never happened before, and for good reason."
"There's a first for everything."
He shook his head. "No, there can't be a first for this. I can't let you throw away any other romantic opportunities you have for me. We may never see each other after this visit."
"My sister is married to Santa. There's no way I'm not coming back after this. And besides, long distance relationships are a thing."
"This one would be...very long distance."
She slid her arm from his and took his hand in hers. "I'm willing to try. I like you too much to give up without a fight."
Every rational part of his brain was screaming for him to stop. He could not let things go further. It was better for her if they ended everything after that first kiss and went hteir separate ways.
But the less rational part of his brain was louder than the rest, telling him not to give up this chance at happiness outside of work. He deserved to love and to be loved, just like anyone else in the world. If it worked for Scott, it had to work for him too, right?
He sighed and squeezed her hands. "It won't be easy."
"I don't expect it to be."
"You won't be able to be here a lot unless you're willing to give up everything the way Carol did."
"That's fine, we can make that work."
"And if you do end up coming here permanently, you can't tell anyone who I really am, or who Scott and Carol really are. You'll have to lie to everyone in your life. Is that something you can be okay with?"
(Y/N) stepped closer to him so that their noses were nearly touching. "I'm already lying about Scott and Carol. What's one more lie about the man I love?"
Love.
It was enough for him to abandon all hope at resisting her. He closed the space between them, kissing her again so passionately that it made her head spin. She wrapped her arms around his neck to steady herself, while he wrapped his arms around her waist.
He could've kissed her forever. He could've stood there, wrapped around her and her wrapped around him, the cold nipping at them but barely bothering them, forever. He wanted to take this moment and freeze it, to never have to go back to his busy life as Santa's right hand elf ever again.
But she pulled away first, resting her forehead against his.
"I did promise my mom a girl's day," she said with a sigh. "And I think if I blow her off for this, she'll probably actually kill me."
"I guess I'll have to let you go then."
But he didn't, and she didn't let go of him. They laughed and kissed again.
It would be another several minutes before he would finally (and reluctantly) let her go.
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