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inevitably-johnlocked · 3 years

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Hi!

I'm here for a pretty stupid thing actually but I've always found it annoying to do: summaries for fics. I never know how much is too little, how much is too much, or if what I'm putting is going to make people think “wow this sounds interesting” or “wow what a shit, keep scrolling”

Do you think it is better to make a summary as such, or include some lines from the story? Idk, any advice would be appreciated

Thanks for taking your time to read!

Hugss🥰

Hey Nonny!! *HUGS*

Ah, the bane of all writers... the blasted summary to describe your story in as little words as possible to get people interested. The LITERAL very last thing you have to do on a story. Always a fun time.

And it's daunting and can feel very overwhelming, because, just like in advertising (my professional background), you have a TINY window to grasp people's attention and make them WANT to click on your fic to read. As an avid reader of fanfic, I do have my own preferences on what I look for... but as a professional, I think I can offer some wisdom in this part here, for a change. PLEASE KNOW that this is different for EVERYONE! These are just some things I picked up in my 20 years in advertising, and applying it to – what is essentially – a "classifieds" board for stories.

Attention-Grabbing Title – Not PERTINENT, but the average reader is more likely to continue reading what you have to offer if your headline is interesting. Even one word ones can grab attention. Something whimsical or metaphorical to your story is always a winner.

Short and Concise Description / Call to Action – One to two sentences is an average attention span before someone gets bored and moves on to the next post. You need to entice someone into reading MORE of your summary in those first two sentences, if you have a long summary. Start your summary with the subject of the story. ie. "John has a problem: he's well hung." That example right there will entice someone to read your summary further.

Grammar Check your Summary – BECAUSE the summary is a representation of what's to come in your story, make sure you get that summary spell-checked or beta'd with your beta. It's a small thing, but it can help bring people in, and especially if you're trying to appeal to a language that you're unfamiliar with. Your beta can even help you refine the summary so it's more attention-grabbing.

Rate Your Story – "Not Rated" stories have a lesser chance of being read than something rated. Doesn't matter what it is, just put a rating there. At least, if people are doing a ratings filter, then you will show up in a search result.

If You're Writing a WiP, State the status of your story at the end of your summary. Many people such as myself don't want to start a WiP without the certainty that it will be done. Stating something like "Story is finished, new chapter every Friday" is a GREAT way to get engagement on your story, AND generate excitement and buzz for it from the day-oners. THEY are your advertisers. A LOT of people like the suspense of a week-to-week model... it's why syndicated television is still alive! A lot of our Fandom authors do their stories this way, working on chapters weeks in advance while posting chapters "approved". It gives YOU time to write and proof, while also having a Live / Active WiP Story that will keep people coming back.

So yeah, those are some tips from an advertising standpoint.

As a reader, though, my PERSONAL interest in a fic is based solely on these 4 things:

The Ship Tags – use "/" (slash for Slash-fiction) for romantic and sexual relationships, and "&" for platonic/friendships or non-sexual relationships. I, for a fact, DO filter stories by the ship tags FIRST, so I'm sure other people do too. Make sure that you use them.

The Story Tags – Ao3 has spoiled us with these!... List relevant tags, tropes, Universes, and genres that pertain to your story... these are what help get your story found in the search algorithm. Don't write "tumblr-style tags" (ie. "this story took way too long") into this field. It is a big turn off for many people (myself included), AND it fucks with the Ao3 search results. Use author notes or descriptions to write your Tumblr-style musings! The tags should ONLY contain content within your story that may appeal to people OR help trigger/content warn against stuff. Yes, I understand that many authors poo-poo on "spoilers in tags", but in all the years I have been reccing fics, I have NEVER ONCE been told that people don't like how meticulous I tag everything I rec. A LOT of people will use those tags to filter OUT stuff that they personally can't read or don't like. Apart from the summary, the Tags are VERY important, AND it can help you come up with a more interesting and short summary that doesn't need to be descriptive. Use the suggested tags that Ao3 offers when you start typing – these are tags, I believe, that have been used frequently on the site.

The Summary – I KNOW it is legit the worst thing to have to come up with, but your story has a higher chance of being read if you stick to writing a concise summary as I've pointed out above. Some people also may choose to use an interesting blurb from their stories as a preview, which some DON'T like, but it's honestly better than nothing. I know for a fact that I have skipped over stories that don't have SOMETHING in the summary box NOR any tags. I know this isn't what you want to hear, Lovely, but put something here, even if it's just "A literal fuck-tonne of porn without plot" (I give authors permission to steal that pun, LOL).

WiP or Not – This is one of those "gamble" things. As I mentioned above, some authors do a week-to-week advanced model for their story chapters, while others "post each chapter when done". The latter tends to wind up with stories in limbo. PERSONALLY, I don't read WiP's for the simple fact that I get confused REALLY easily on plot lines when I do – I like reading one whole story in one go. But PLEASE don't take this as the golden end-all/be-all. This is a personal preference, since I read a LOT of fics and I have very little time these days to do it. Some people love WiPs. A good way to indicate that you have a story plotted out, but is NOT a week-to-week model? Add the Chapter count, rather than leaving it as "?". People are more likely to follow your WiP WITH a chapter count, since it gives the illusion that you have a rough draft written out and you know how long it will be.

So yeah! I hope this helped you out a bit, Nonny. Sorry it's so long, but I thought with how long I've been reading fics and with how picky I am with fics, these tips would be helpful for you. Again, at the end of the day, it's ALWAYS up to personal preferences of the readers. And don't take it personally if you can't "get an audience" right away. Just be yourself, write because you LOVE writing, and you will have a fruitful and enjoyable time publishing your story!

If any experienced authors in the fandom want to add their two cents from a WRITER'S perspective, please do! <3

#steph replies #my advice #writing advice #ao3 #archive of our own #my thoughts

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stopeatingwhales · 3 years

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vinyl searching (pt. 1) x graham coxon

okok i'm so sorry i haven't posted in such a long amount of time, but i'm back! (and hopefully for much longer this time haha). this was requested to me a very long time ago and i fell in love with the entire concept immediately - i'm sorry it took so unbelievably long to post it!! i might make a second part to this as i felt like i haven’t properly put the story to an end so look out for that!

Pairing: 1999 graham coxon x reader

Warnings: nothing!

Word count: 3.421

part two

Requested by anon (I’m so sorry this is so late) x

༉‧₊˚✧

Cutting open my last box of new vinyl, I quickly scanned through the contents, figuring out what genres it had consisted of. I discovered a brimmed box of popular 80s vinyls ready to be organised as I allowed my nimble finger to slowly caress every bump that was conveyed whilst it went through every single record. Working in a record shop was often tiring due to the amount of physical labour you have to commit to doing (it really takes a toll on your back sometimes), but it overall was a magical experience, with a lot of perks: free vinyls every once in a while, the ability to snatch a first copy of a highly anticipated album before it got sold out, and ultimately being able to be surrounded by art constantly. It was a genuine blessing to be able to work in a shop that abides and requires your whole passion, because it can never go to waste. What was beautiful about music was that, regardless of personality, fashion or who you genuinely were, everyone can connect to some form of it, whether it be rock, pop, hip/hop, rap, anything. A simple strum of a guitar or mumble of a lyric can manipulate one’s mind so diligently that you become so enthralled by that rhythm to the point it consumes and dictates your entire outlook on existentialism and surroundings of life. You are free to interpret what you like from either lyrics, melodies or even music videos; music is there for one form a bonding with it, not to be told specifically what this or that means, otherwise it loses its enchanting wizardry. Unsurprisingly, you are never able to free yourself from the affiliation that you receive from music, as it is infinite, absolute, limitless without end. Every day, every hour, every minute, there is either a small group, or just one person, attempting to create melodies and cadences that can resonate with people for the rest of their lives - and once they’ve cracked that specific coding, that in which takes overwhelming amounts of dedication, you have created something that is unforgettable to maybe a nation, or a couple, or just one single person. Regardless of the amount, with such ability, you carry the ultimate power that no grade, mark or report card, can ever prove to show.

Exhaling, I began to stock up the few crates that were beginning to gain empty space in between the few vinyls that embraced them. Attempting to organise them as quickly as I could, I hummed along to the soft music that was escaping out of the radio. Usually, during the day, there wouldn’t be much activity in the store, so having to care for the place by myself wasn’t something out of the ordinary. The shop tended to be more of a second home to me; it never became excessively stressful, and being able to conversate with customers about opinions on specific albums or ‘which album by this or that artist is their best?’ was always an enjoyable part of the day as it simply felt as if it was a random conversation instigated in a bar. Almost as if you’re discoursing with a long lost friend; you gain this sort of connection between specific albums that both mean something to you, and despite the fact that it could mean completely opposing ideas, you were both able to share that connection the music was able to provoke. The shop was moderately small, with 6 rows of 5 crates (two on either side of the wall) aligned neatly, three quarters of a metre separating each in order to allow those to walk around. Having the space quite compact yet overflowing with all sorts of music was what made the space so enthralling. You could have your favourite album of all time sitting there, patiently lingering for your grasp and attraction to seep in, and eventually your purchase - all you seemingly had to do was rummage for it. That in specific is what makes record searching so entertaining, simply scanning through crates of records until you find something that appeals to you. And although you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, if a band has put enough effort in their covers, it would appeal to people more, and therefore allow more sales to seep through. Situated on the end of a high street which had countless amounts of civilians walking into multiple stores each day, only a few customers had come in every so often as it only sold vinyls, and CDs were becoming more of an attraction these days. It didn’t bother me all that much - I definitely preferred having only a few customers in and out every couple of hours in comparison to groups of screaming teenagers begging for the chance that I might have the Californication vinyl by the Red Hot Chilli Peppers.

Once I had completed distributing the vinyls to their designated boxes, I put the large - now empty - cardboard box behind the counter to place in the rubbish after my shift was over. As if on cue, I was met with the light ringing sounds that escaped from the bell at the top of the clear glass door, indicating that someone had arrived in the shop. Swiftly turning my head to figure out who it was, I was met with the sight of Graham Coxon, a usual customer, and an amazing lead guitarist in one of the most known bands in Britain as of this moment due to their latest album titled 13, Blur. News had surfaced that the band were having troubles between each other, and it became apparent that Graham hadn’t played on the album that much. He looked a little scruffy, his short hair untidy but that didn’t make him look horrible, it suited him very much. There were small dark circles forming on his eyes, exposing ideations that he may not have slept, or been able to sleep, which played on my heart strings a little. Although he was a heart-throb of many young girls over the coming years, especially during the height of the Britpop era, he had the demeanor completely contrasting against those projected to the nation by his other bandmates. Graham was quiet, reticent, composed, and it was obvious that the entire Britpop era didn’t work to well for him - being put up against Oasis to fight for the supposed ‘king’ of a genre proved its mental strains on him, to the point he had began drinking to escape his struggles. Me and Graham had become quite good friends over the months that he had been visiting the store, so a shocked face and beg for an autograph was something that by no means would be happening in this given moment. I always felt that because of Graham’s restrictive attitude, it caused him to be quite secluded from maintaining a lot of friendships - although that may just be an assumption. “You alright?” I asked sweetly, putting on a soft smile as I made my way over to the counter.

“Yeah, fine thanks. You?” He replied, exchanging the same smile which caused my heart to patter in an unsteady rhythm as he paced over to one of the crates, beginning his search for something new. Over time as mine and Graham’s friendship had bloomed, I felt myself forming a sort of tenderness for him. The way he stared at the ground whilst speaking to someone; the way he ruffled through his dark coloured hair ever so often; the way he bit his lip when conflicted against what album he should buy, were all things that I had taken into note after I had caught my eyes staring at him repeatedly, every single time he had entered the shop. And of course, he was immensely good looking, which only added to the long list of things that made me so captivated by his presence. Sometimes he would meet my eyes, to which I would instantly look away, hot flushes forming on both my cheeks over the sudden embarrassment I would receive from being caught admiring someone. Then again, would you not continue to stare at someone who carried an undeniable amount of beauty, that they were so oblivious to understanding that they had?

“I’m alright, we’ve got a couple new 80s records in the crate over there if you’re interested.” I said, exiting the counter as my finger pointed towards the freshly updated crate. Whenever Graham had come into the shop, he tended to spend a good chunk of his time in here, which made me almost addicted to his presence there constantly. We would talk about a lot of things, bridging from best albums of specific decades, to what our favorite candy was. It was a joyful experience, talking to someone that you would have seemingly looked up to for such a long period of time, watching them grow musically, but also physically. In ‘91, all the boys from Blur had charmed themselves with tattered bowl-cuts, which indirectly emphasised their innocent-yet-psychedelic look. Now, his hair was in a much different state, almost completely short yet there was still a small chunk of hair covering his forehead. I much preferred this look of his, though. He looked mature, and pairing with his personality that I have come to be somewhat close with, it boosted his attractiveness. Whenever he left the shop, I would be accompanied with such boredom and sadness right afterwards. I seemingly wanted him here, all the time, adding to the fondness that I had formed for him.

Shifting his gaze to interlock eyes with mine, I felt my heart begin to form into the same unsteady pattern it composed when he had reciprocated my smile. “I’ve pretty much listened to everything that had appealed to me from that decade, it was when I was growing up you know.” He chuckled, which caused my cheeks to heat up a little at the sound of his lovely laugh that I sadly didn’t hear so often than I would’ve liked.

“Well, what have you been coming in here to search for then?” I questioned, slowly making my way to stand next to him as I analysed his actions, his index finger grazing over each album name, mirroring how I was earlier when scanning through the vinyls I needed to unpack. I was able to gain a whiff of his aroma standing near him - he smelled like cigarettes and cologne, a combination that when mixed would sound quite disgusting, but they somehow complimented each other. I attempted to edge my body closer to his, to take a greater look at what exactly he was doing, without it coming across as suggestive. I would have no courage to do something that evocative, anyways.

I allowed my arm to rest on the other crates as my hand held my face. I felt Graham’s stare switch from the vinyls to quickly take a look at me, noticing my new positioning. A very short silence was shared between the pair of us, almost as if Graham was trying to find the right words to say, whilst the music from the radio had continued on playing. “Not too sure, just want to find something to listen to,” he began, slowly trailing off his sentence as he pulled a record out and examined its cover. “I’ve worn out all of my records at this point so I’m practically desperate for something else.”

“Well, you’ve come to the right place!” I grinned, making eye contact with him for a short second, before switching to look at the album he was looking at. He was holding up Pavement’s 1997 album, Brighten the Corners. The cover was quite colourful and artsy, almost as if it had come straight out of a cartoon. “Play that on the record player, see if you like it.”

Moving over to the record player that was situated by the cashier, he took the record out of its sleeve, placing it on the turntable as carefully as possible. I turned my body around to watch him place the stylus on the grooves of the record, my body fixated in place. Every so often I would glance at the walls of the shop, which were decorated messily with band posters and tour-dates of multiple bands that you were able to purchase in-store. Although it was untidy, it added to the sensation of music; you don’t need to be the smartest, the most organised, the most put-together person in order to make an amazing album. All you could have is three chords that you are unaware of the names, and you’ve got a song. The Sex Pistols done it, and the message they portrayed was that no matter who you are, you can make music. It’s universal. Sometimes my gaze shifted to look through the window that portrayed the cars passing down the road, with the occasional person walking past. The comparison of outside, where it professedly looked very dull and unhappy, and the liveliness of such a small shop, is what proves the power of music. Life is tedious without some colour in it. Regardless of anything though, my eyes would always trail back to Graham, whose back was resting on the counter where the cashier was, intently listening to the music draining from the turntable. The sweet sounds of pop songs that were once splashing out of the radio were now inaudible; the record player emitted music that was much louder, so it was now the only thing you could hear inside the closed space. By the look of Graham’s expression it seemed that his desperation to listen to something new was much needed than I had come to expect; it was almost as if he depended on the new music to soothe him away from whatever thoughts, or distressing moods that were battling his mind.

Once the song had ended, I decided to ask for his opinion on it. “What do you think?”

I watched him intently as his eyes fluttered back open, examining his facial features slightly. Our eyes had met, and they stayed fixed in place as I began admiring his honey-like orbs. “It was good, might as well get it to hear the rest of the album.” He answered, sighing slightly at the end of his sentence. It was quite obvious, to me, that he had been going through something that he wasn’t able to quite mention or bring up to anyone - especially me, as I am only just a worker he knew quite well inside a record shop. It enthralled me slightly, how mysterious he was, although he was completely projected to the limelight of Top Of The Pops and many interviews countless amounts of times over the years. The thought of asking him how he was always played in my mind; his reaction however, frightened me to the point of me avoiding the topic. I didn’t want to come across as patronising, I simply cared for him, for someone I didn’t even know all that well, too much.

Graham placed the vinyl back into its sleeve gently, and then made his way to where he previously stood - next to me. Although our bodies weren’t touching, I felt as if my skin was entering the gates of hell due to the amount of heat that had been emitting from my skin. He began looking through the same vinyl crate that he did before, whilst my eyes inspected his hands, allowing my thoughts to randomly drift on the feeling of his hand in mine. How soft his palm may feel, how warm it would be - like a hug from a loved one when you needed it most, their touch, caressing, having so much impact that it completely changes your entire mood for a short period of time. How they could perfectly merge together, his and mine. Or not, though either way it would release a sensation of my teenage-girl like self, squealing inside over the fact that a boy that I've seemingly fallen for is in grasp of my palm. I doubt that he was feeling the same things that I was, but in moments so silent but loud, exactly like this one, it was all I could muster a thought about. “You have lovely eyes.”

I noticed Graham pause in his movements once those accidental words slipped off my mouth. Mentally cursing myself, my gaze was fixed on him. The air was a little tense, the pit in my stomach completely empty from my unneeded slip-up of words. “Thank you…” He replied, shifting his gaze over to look at me. He seemed taken aback to my sudden compliment, which made me feel a little embarrassed, causing my cheeks to heat up slightly. “Yours are lovely too.”

My heart fluttered slightly towards the compliment he passed back to me, my lip sinking into my teeth in anticipation towards where the conversation was headed. Graham’s awkward self carried on searching through vinyls, and began walking over to different crates in search for something else. I moved to position myself behind the till, where my gaze followed him as he preoccupied himself in the cover art of multiple vinyls he had taken out, admiring them or looking perplexed by them, then putting them back into their original place if they weren’t appealing to him. I began humming along to the new song that began playing on the radio, as I played with my fingers, deciding on forwarding the conversation to something else. “What are you up to this week?”

“Nothing much… I’m probably going to stay at home. There’s not much to do these days.” He answered, his eyes glued onto the vinyls he had now found. My heart sank after those words left his mouth, almost in pity for him - he didn’t seem like he was fully okay, then again no one is, but it came across as if he had been struggling quite a bit mentally and that he needed someone to be there for him, yet he didn’t know exactly how to ask for it, or maybe he felt cowardly to ask. He began to walk over to the cashier, instigating the fact that he had found the records he’s decided to buy - filling my stomach up in an unusual mix of sadness and anticipation. I wanted him to be here, all the time.

“So I assume you’re not doing anything tonight?” I questioned, taking the vinyls from his hand in order to scan them and place in a bag. I avoided his stare whilst asking, though I could feel the burn of his eyes intently staring at every move I made.

“Yeah, the most I’m going to do is probably listen to these vinyls at home.”

With the little amount of courage I had spared inside, I decided to take a big leap of my conscience and ask him a question he’s undoubtedly been asked so many times before. Lifting my gaze to connect eyes with him after I had finished neatly placing everything into a plastic bag, I handed the vinyls to him. “Do you want to go out tonight?”

“I mean I’d like to go out.” He responded, completely oblivious to what I was egging towards, which only bubbled the apprehension inside me even more. I began to second guess the idea of me asking him out to do something together.

“Graham.” I sternly responded, a hint of annoyance laced between my voice when I spoke his name.

“What?”

Sighing to myself, I realised that his oblivion wasn’t on purpose, which brought the same feeling of a sinking heart in my body. I came to realise that Graham had been so isolated, so deserted from society, that he was completely blind towards someone taking an interest in him. Inhaling sharply, I asked, with my sweetest smile. “Would you like to go out with me tonight?”

Graham’s expression had completely changed from his delirium to shocked. His eyes widened, a reddish tint forming on his cheeks as his lip sank into his bottom teeth. A couple seconds were shared between us staring closely at each other's eyes, as I tried to decipher what was going through his mind. “I- Uh- Yes, sure.”

The little stutter that rolled off his tongue warmed my heart as the beam on my face began to widen. I noticed a small smile starting to curve at the bottom of his lip. “That’ll be fifty pounds, please.”

#graham coxon #graham coxon x reader #my writing #blur #blur band #90s #nineties #britpop #band imagines #fluff #fanfic

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letgladnessdwell · 3 years

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I finished YWGTTN and have some wrap-up thoughts under the cut.

The book is quite good for its intended purpose (introduce people to practical tools that can help improve mood and self-understanding) and intended audience (people new to these concepts). It really is an introductory primer to some very foundational ideas—at least in Western psychology—about how to manage and understand thoughts and feelings with the goal of being kinder, more understanding, and more accepting of oneself. The most compelling parts were the sections where Dan anchored an idea or concept to his personal story, and also the sections where very concrete explanations and examples were provided for a certain therapeutic method.

From Dan’s point of view, I can fully understand that writing this felt extremely exposing and vulnerable; even if he doesn’t ultimately reveal a ton about his specific personal experiences, just acknowledging that all of these techniques are something he’s had to work with—mindfulness to get out of his overactive and high-alert brain, reframing to release himself from harsh and unrelenting negativity, self-compassion to learn how to love himself—has got to have felt scary and raw. As a reader, I definitely can appreciate that act of bravery even as I think the book would have been stronger with more personal examples to drive home the different sections of the book.

I really liked the book design, both the physical book and the structure. The black and yellow scheme has really grown on me, I really liked that it didn’t have a dust cover, and the black quote pages throughout the book were very aesthetically pleasing to my eye.

I found the This Night/Tomorrow/The Days After That organizing structure quite smart; it’s such a palatable, non-overwhelming, manageable way to present this sort of information and I think the metaphor of it all provides a great mental hook to help the information stick.

I was familiar with all of the general mental health concepts already, but there were multiple specific bits that were really good reminder to me or that sparked a new way of thinking about an issue. In particular, the section on improving your physical environment and surroundings resonated with me and the discussion of working to understand the “rules” you have about life that may be distorting your thinking is definitely something I need to continue to actively work on. I have been doing one of the mind-body exercises (the 54321 one) almost everyday because I find it so enjoyable and useful, and I probably felt most inspired by the book’s discussion of the importance of striving to be more present in the real world.

The parts of the book that were less successful for me or that I struggled with all revolve around specificity and writing style. I know this is meant to be a general introduction, but I found some of the language too abstract or fleeting for my taste. One example of this would be the concept of “happiness” as the outcome of doing this mental health work. I used to be obsessed with achieving happiness, but over the last few years have personally abandoned that goal as being too simplistic and unhelpful. Instead, I find the idea of “contentment” much more useful to pursue. I don’t think Dan is saying that working on your mental health will result in a constant, unalloyed state of happiness, but I do wish he had spent more time defining what he means. There were other sections, particularly toward the end of the book, that I think also suffered some from the same abstraction. I know that’s likely a balance he and the consulting psychologist were trying to strike between providing digestible and actionable advice versus deep dives into philosophical or existential questions, but imprecise language in my opinion can lead to misunderstanding or frustration as a reader.

I knew going into this that I was going to have some problems with Dan’s writing style. There were lots of sections where I was immersed and not aware of the writing, which is always the ideal experience for me as a reader. Other parts I’d get distracted and pulled out of the narrative with too many comma splices, convoluted sentence structure, and tonal shifts. I would love to know more about the editing process for books like this in general, as this is a case where, for me, just a slightly heavier hand by the editor would have smoothed out a lot of these issues without sacrificing Dan’s voice.

Reading this book humanized Dan for me in ways I wasn’t expecting. I think I understand his inner world in a different way that I had before, as being much more rigid, tightly controlled, and fear-based than I’d previously thought. Which, honestly, is very relatable.

I also think the book is quite comforting in that it’s clear Dan is still working on a lot of his issues, and like most of us, will be doing so for the rest of his life. We’re all in this mess together, and that’s always important to remember.

It’s not perfect, but I absolutely think the book will be very helpful to some readers and that it will be a gentle, encouraging companion for them. And by that measure, it’s a success.

I have lots more thoughts about the book and Dan, so this is just a general summary.

Also, dude wrote a whole-ass book! Kudos!

#this night #ywgttn #ywgttn spoilers #daniel howell

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banshee1013 · 4 years

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Suptober Day 1 - On The Road Again

So, here we go again! Attempting more art/fic for Suptober. This time, I’m going to string each day’s art/fic into one cohesive story (and a post-season 15 timestamp for “Ten Inch Hero” even!) Wish me luck! Here’s Day One - On The Road Again. Enjoy! ==================================== Title: The Road Less Traveled (subject to change) Overall Rating: Mature (may change to Explicit, heed the tags for each entry) Tags: Castiel/Dean, mention of Sam/Eileen, Post-Season 15, ExAngel!Cas, MostlyRetiredHunter!Dean, Road Trip

(Note: all ficlets are unbeta’d. At the end of the month, I’ll wrap up whatever I manage to get written, clean it up, get it beta’d, and post to AO3. So please pardon any mistakes!) ========================================

CHAPTER ONE - On The Road Again Words: 988

Castiel startles, disrupted from his reading as a loud clatter coming from the Bunker’s kitchen shatters the looming silence.

Things have been very quiet since Chuck was defeated, with Jack watching over Heaven, Rowena watching over Hell, Benny ruling Purgatory, and Billie keeping the Shadow company in The Empty. Oh, there were still hunts, but they were few and far between. Without Chuck to twist creatures to his storytelling needs, they have been more or less content to live their lives like regular citizens. Castiel had been occupying his non-hunt downtime reading everything the Men of Letter’s vast Library contained; and exploring his new humanity - his Grace being sacrificed in the battle against Chuck.

Dean had gone to great measures to make this new human existence of his as pleasurable as possible - introducing him to new flavors in both food and drink, new activities... and many new and different carnal pleasures.

He closes his book - the Library’s very special edition of Alice In Wonderland, of particular interest to him due to its role in returning Dean to full size after their encounter with a witch earlier this year - setting it upon the table before him and rises, heading to the kitchen to investigate the disturbance.

Turning into the kitchen doorway, he is greeted by the enjoyable site of Dean bent over in front of the refrigerator, jeans stretched tight over his superior posterior. He smirked at his own thought - “superior posterior”. Rhymes always pleased him greatly, especially when they were his own.

Tearing his eyes reluctantly away, he notices the possible source of the earlier clattering noise - the green cooler, most commonly occupying the back seat of the Impala, was now situated on the kitchen island, lid open. As he ponders the significance of the appearance of the cooler outside of its normal environment, Dean rises from his rummaging, packages of cold cuts and cheese in his hands, and turns toward the cooler on the island. His eyes raise and catch Castiel’s.

“Hey, Cas!” Dean’s remarkable green eyes sparkle in the warm light of the kitchen, and the corners of his mouth pull up into a bright smile.

Lips...very distracting, Castiel notes to himself. Very distracting indeed.

“Uh... Earth to Cas? You in there, Major Tom?” Dean waves at him, breaking Castiel’s stare and diverting his gaze from Dean’s distractingly full lips, back up to his equally distracting eyes.

He takes a moment to contemplate the pros and cons of his new-found humanity and the increased sensory input now available to him, and decides that, while inconvenient and often overwhelming, they had allowed him the ability to move from merely admiring Dean’s soul, to the capacity to admire every other other part of him as well - and to experience the joy of falling madly in love with him.

He feels his own lips pull into a smile matching Dean’s own. “I am still on Earth, and also understand that reference.” His smile widens at his own joke. Jokes were also very enjoyable, even his subpar ones; especially when they caused Dean to laugh as he had just started doing.

“Dammit, I love you so much, Cas,” Dean says, recovering from his outburst. “Never, ever change.”

“I will do my very best to not change, unless the change improves my ability to make you laugh,” Ignoring Dean’s snort, he addresses the subject at hand.

“I heard a noise and came to investigate.” He gestures toward the open cooler. “I assume the presence of the cooler and the sandwich ingredients in your hands means you are planning a trip.”

“Got it in one, hot stuff,” Dean says, tossing the lunchmeat and cheese into the cooler and closing the lid.

Castiel tilts his head in confusion, and not from Dean’s insinuation that his body temperature is elevated (he gets that reference as well). “Is there a hunt I was not aware of? I thought Sam and Eileen were occupied with one, is there a need for another?”

Dean snorted again. “The only thing Sam and Eileen are “hunting” - fingers hooking the air for emphasis, much to Castiel’s amusement - “is a good place to play ‘hide the sausage’ somewhere not where his brother and ex-angel boyfriend are playing the same game.”

Castiel nods in commiseration - the Bunker may be isolated, but it is not soundproof. However - “What if a hunt comes up?”

Dean waves a hand dismissively. “Plenty of hunters in the sea, Cas.” He strides over to Castiel, placing hands still cool from the refrigerated items he was recently handling around Castiel’s neck and pressing their foreheads together. “We defeated Chuck, Cas. Let someone else handle the bit players.”

With Dean this close, Castiel can barely string together a coherent thought, let alone an objection.

“I’ve packed beer, pie, condiments, sandwich makings, chips, and a loaf of the bread I made yesterday in there,” he says, pulling back slightly to tilt his head toward the cooler. “and clothes and stuff already in the trunk. Whadda ya say we hit the road, sweetheart?”

Castiel stares into those emerald irises and can deny him nothing.

“Where will we go?”

Dean shrugged, his thumbs caressing Castiel’s cheeks. “Thought we might head west, see what we can see. Get some coffee in Seattle, wine in Napa Valley, hit the beaches in Monterey, fish tacos in San Diego... I dunno.” He presses a swift, sweet kiss to Castiel’s lips, pulling back and leaving him wanting more.

“Let’s just see where the road takes us. You in?”

Castiel nods dumbly. Of course he’s in.

Dean smiles again, and with a brush of fingertips across his cheek, turns away from Castiel and ambles to the kitchen island, hoisting the cooler from the counter and heads out the door to the garage.

Castiel follows. He’s followed Dean to Hell and would do so again in a heartbeat if he asked him to.

A road trip is definitely preferable.

#suptober20 #DayOne #art #fic

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ahhsokka · 3 years

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Star Wars: Light of the Jedi — Review

Reading Dates: 08/16 - 08/18/2021 Word Count for Review: 1880

TL;DR: This is a must-read for the High Republic era. It mostly feels like exposition for follow-up projects instead of its own story, but it is still a good book and an enjoyable read. Main criticism is that we get too much information for one book. Important to note that the Jedi are cool.

INTRODUCTION Welcome to the era of the High Republic, a golden age of peace and prosperity throughout the galaxy. Charles Soule authored this first installation for the project: Light of the Jedi. We follow a brand new cast of characters in the galaxy as they navigate the immediate aftermath of the Great Disaster and the rise of the Nihil, the villains of the High Republic project. In this review, I’ll give a vague and brief summary of the book and then dive into my compliments and criticisms of it.

SUMMARY PART ONE Part One focuses purely on the Great Disaster, beginning with the event that caused it and ending with a last-ditch effort by the Jedi to save the entire Hetzal system. Billions of lives are on the line, and the countdown until impact clock at the beginning of each chapter reminds us how close everyone is to death. Soule introduces us to the main cast of characters that feature not only in this book but also in the whole of the High Republic project. Some of these new faces include Avar Kriss, Loden Greatstorm and his Padawan Bell Zettifar, Nib Assek and her Padawan Burryaga Agaburry, and Chancellor Lina Soh. Brilliant technician Keven Tarr, the Hetzal government, and a fleet of Jedi work together to keep peace on the planet, blow up debris, and save lives. By the end, the overwhelming sentiment is “it could’ve been worse.” Although casualties in the Hetzal system were kept to a minimum, the people of Ab Dalis were not as lucky—twenty million people were killed without a shred of hope for salvation.

PART TWO Finally, we meet “the big bad”—the Nihil. A ragtag group of marauders led by three Tempest Runners and their Eye, Marchion Ro. Throughout Part Two, Soule briefly dives into the history and organization of the Nihil, how they become a powerful group after they first received ‘the paths’ from Ro’s father, and where they are headed from here following their own involvement in the Great Disaster. As Marchion Ro attempts to gain more power within the Nihil, the Jedi and the Republic are working on two main problems: solve the mystery behind the Great Disaster and make sure it never happens again. Towards the end, a third task is added to that list: bring down the Nihil.

PART THREE Now that the Republic knows about the Nihil involvement in the Great Disaster, they focus their attention on snuffing the group out and maintaining peace in the Outer Rim before the opening ceremony of Starlight Beacon. While transporting a flight recorder that is instrumental to learning more about the Great Disaster, a fleet of Republic ships encounters the Nihil. Tempest Runner Kassav Milliko was sent by Marchion Ro to intercept the fleet, but he was vastly underprepared for their numbers. Although he was essentially being sent to battle as a sacrifice, Kassav led his warriors in the dirtiest fight the Republic had ever seen, killing many of their troops. Despite their efforts, his entire Tempest perished. The Republic successfully opens Starlight Beacon, but they do so with the knowledge that a great threat could be waiting around the corner.

COMPLIMENTS I would like to make it very clear that I enjoyed reading this novel. Charles Soule was handed a tall task in opening up an entirely new era. He had to make it compelling enough for readers to stay engaged with the story he was trying to tell while also building up the setting of an unexplored time period. Some planets and concepts will be familiar to fans, but for the most part, the structure of the universe is different from what we’ve known. Although I have some criticism for this book, I believe that Charles Soule and the rest of the Project Luminous team successfully created this new era. I want to know more about the characters and what the universe was like for people at this time. We only know of the galaxy at war; what does it look like at peace?

By far, my favorite part of Light of the Jedi was, of course, the Jedi. The way that the Force is perceived by each individual—as a song, a forest, and an endless ocean—is so beautiful. (Whenever Avar Kriss would mention the song that she hears in her head, I would get chills imagining it.) The bond between Padawan and Master was well done and seems to be a common theme not just for this story but many others in the High Republic project (for example, the High Republic comic by Cavan Scott). Loden Greatstorm and Bell Zettifar are by far one of the most fascinating pairings. Burryaga, a Wookiee Jedi, and his sensitivity to the emotions of others saves the lives of many people and will be a fascinating character to follow in the future (mainly because we so rarely see Force sensitive Wookiees). The High Republic is truly when the Jedi are at their peak; they are the light; there is no other interpretation. (Although I fear that will change as we learn more.)

We are all the Republic. Chancellor Lina Soh is a breath of fresh air from the Clone Wars politics that fans are used to. She clearly loves the Republic and makes decisions which she believes will only benefit its future. It seems that many of the people she works with also hold the same ideals, and I genuinely am excited to learn where it all goes wrong. As horrible as that sounds, only a couple of centuries later, we get Chancellor Palpatine and the Galactic Empire, so clearly something went wrong—what will Lina Soh sacrifice for peace, and how does it go awry?

As for the Nihil: Marchion Ro is honestly terrifying. Soule clearly spent a lot of time developing this storyline to turn the Nihil from being a disorganized group of thieves and murderers to essentially becoming a crime syndicate. Ro almost feels like Maul in his planning skills and adaptability and his cruelty and temper. Obviously, Maul is one of the most beloved Star Wars villains, so I wonder if they used him as a template for Ro. Without their Eye, the Nihil are quite rowdy and kind of dumb, which made them less threatening, in my opinion. They make many mistakes, are selfish, and basically have no impulse control (at least the ones we interact with the most). Initially, that was a criticism, but the rise of Marchion Ro most certainly makes it clear why the Nihil needed to be like this. They aren’t threats until they have a cut-throat, meticulous leader at the helm.

CRITICISMS My biggest criticism is that we know too much as readers. There’s no mystery or puzzle for us to figure out alongside the characters. We understand the story for the most part and have to watch it play out as expected. Although I felt for Captain Hedda Casset and was glad to read her story, I wish that we got it later in the book, or maybe we heard about it through the flight recorder (which didn’t play as big of a role as I expected). The flight recorder acts as a metaphor for most of the book in that way. Something that we’re told is important, but it doesn’t feel that way by the end.

The Great Disaster was horrific, for sure. Billions of people died, and that will be felt for years to come in the galaxy. However, once again, it didn’t feel that way while reading. The Jedi coming in and saving the day and successfully preventing the deaths of an entire planetary system, although an excellent introduction for the Jedi Order, took away from the impact of the event. Even the way it was handled afterward felt clinical and detached. Keven Tarr was the one exception, in my eyes, who conveyed the urgency in solving the situation, but his point of view was unfortunately rare.

This metaphor applies to the Nihil as well. We know so much about them that their intrigue is gone. The most important beats of their recent history with the Eye has already been revealed. The fact that they did start out as a small-time gang who are just now evolving into something greater is exciting, but I personally would’ve liked to see that in a separate story. Peeling away the layers of a villain is much more interesting than getting most of the information immediately. In the grander scheme of the High Republic narrative, the Nihil had the best introduction to explain why they are threats. However, Light of the Jedi as a single story in that narrative suffered as a result. The villain didn’t feel like a villain.

To round it all out, there are a lot of characters. I honestly recommend using some memory trick to remember the names (personally, I grouped or paired them together). One great part of this book is that it doesn’t shy away from death, but at the same time, that made it difficult to get attached to characters. Either I didn’t get to spend enough time with a character and their companions, or I actively didn’t get attached to a character because I didn’t know if they were important enough. As a result, the losses weren’t felt as much. I understood that it was a significant loss, but I didn’t feel it. (Big spoiler) The death of Jora Malli is an example of this, and the only reason I felt anything was because of Master Sskeer’s reaction.

That may be a criticism that only I have, and honestly, it’s pretty minor in the grand scheme of things. Charles Soule did a great job introducing this era. I can still say I enjoyed reading the book, and at the end of the day, that’s all that really matters.

CONCLUSION Ultimately, Light of the Jedi sometimes feels like an exposition-heavy Marvel movie. Not bad at all, just a different story structure. It’s a stepping stone for other stories in the High Republic era. I have already read some other High Republic content and all of it benefited from the information in this book. This is ground zero, an absolute must-read for the High Republic. However, it sometimes is just too much information. I certainly enjoyed learning about this era, and I’m looking forward to reading everything else, some of these stories and characters could’ve been introduced later on, in my opinion.

But hey, I’m not a fiction author, so I definitely don’t know if any of my thoughts or ideas would’ve made a better story. This is honestly a best-case scenario for the first work in this universe. I wasn’t confused while reading, and even though I didn’t get attached to all of the characters, there were indeed some that I immediately latched on to (cough cough looking at you, Bell and Loden). All in all, it’s exciting to have brand new characters in a different period. I love the Skywalker saga—it’s our origin as Star Wars fans—, but this is a massive universe, and it’s good for everyone’s mental health to explore other parts of it.

Rating: [ 7 / 10 ]

Note: Hello! This is my first proper book review. I’m obviously still trying to get the hang of it, so if you have any constructive comments, please drop a note; it’s appreciated. :) I’m trying to fly through all of the current High Republic content so that I’m ready for the new stuff, so expect more reviews, among other things that are in the works. Thanks for reading!

#spoilers light of the jedi #star wars #the high republic #star wars the high republic #light of the jedi #light of the jedi review #book review

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deamabilisworld · 4 years

Photo

The first thing a gay person should do is find a community.

So blue is the warmest colour.

First things first, Emma's outfits make me fall in love.

We oftentimes understand genres from superficial features. Horror for instance by threatening situations, death, etc.

But once in a while a radical author arrives into the scene and triggers all the emotions related with the genre, without actually repeating any of its tropes.

It is easy to classify lesbianism as girl on girl relationship. And the relationship with sex, and so lesbianism with a girl on girl sexual relation.

It is more difficult for a trans lesbian such as myself to understand what it means and why was I not satisfied with relationships with women who saw me as male, even disregarding penetration and the assumption that I should be the dominant partner.

So when I try to realize what it means, I try, like many of us, to reflect on lesbianism in media. And throughout the past few months it helped me understand what I was missing, even though I'm yet to theorize or put it into words.

The first hour and a half of the movie was all that for me. I connected what was going through Adele. Especially when she sees Emma for the first time. Having a confident butch wrap her hands around you as you walk in the streets, seeing it from afar and longing.

As for her sex with men compared to the sexual fantasy, that's also interesting.

Men tend to be very focused on penetration. What's more interesting is that they almost have no discussion about their own personal enjoyment in sex.

Think about it: the market for male sex toys is very poor, and men freak when you discuss penetrating them, even though the anal region is filled with nerve endings which guarantee enjoyment.

This leads to their sexual interaction begging technique-driven. Very linear and centred on specific tasks in an almost mechanical way.

I obviously also talk from my own personal experience.

Maybe I'm not the right person to speak about it, but I couldn't find much pleasure when having sex as a guy. The experience was stale, repetitive and motionless. I was not driven by my sensations, rather by my imagination and the need to please the other. It reached to situations where I used to throw my used condoms as fast as possible since I didn't really climax in these interactions.

Which obviously also limits the other's capacity to enjoy the interaction.

The most affirming first experience in my transition was when I was treated as a woman in sex, and I actually reached orgasm for the first time in my life.

Having said that, the first actual sex scene with Emma also bothered me.

When I think of lesbianism and sapphic, I think of things I can actually do as a woman, and to what I relate. Which is obviously very gay scenarios, but rarely penetrative sex.

I imagine cuddling in the middle of the night, a dildo pulled out, we both climax and low key going to bed as if nothing.

I imagine looking her in the eyes as she plays with her fingers inside of me, her dominant eyes give me comfort.

Eating her up.

But having said all of that, vaginas gross me out.

I mean penises gross me much more.

I love breasts and buttocks.

But I really find it difficult being attracted to the vagina, playing with it, kissing it.

One time in the army, I sat with someone as she guarded the base entrance and she told me she usually finds the penis appalling, but when she has sex, it becomes the most beautiful thing in the world.

Dejana once made me insert my fingers to her in the shower, but I couldn't find joy in it.

Let's talk about Dejana for a second.

While she saw me as a hetero and despised lesbians, BITWC was one of her favourite movies. And I could see a reflection of our dynamic in that relationship.

I was stronger in that dynamic. I came from abroad, I had more money, I was her boss's daughter.

I read more, especially and of course philosophy.

Our relationship was a form of escapism.

She wanted the classical type of romance, that which doesn't exist in the rural parts of Serbja. Love, warmth, real human affection deeper than sexual lust.

I was looking for a simple relationship. Cooking together, travelling, I didn't want to think about the fact that I was a lonely outcast in an unfamiliar country.

We laid in bed. She was playing some game on her phone, I was reading for a philosophy essay. In truth, I was avoiding the need to interact with her. Because when we didn't do recreational activities, we didn't have a connection.

For someone who often speaks about the need to hear as many narratives as possible, to understand and relate to the earth, and to understand emotions rather than thoughts, I failed miserably connecting with her.

Dejana would have probably been content with such a relationship. She is used to male detachment, and she is very willing to deny issues in a dynamic, but I couldn't go on with it.

I didn't feel guilty when I broke it up. I felt relief.

Emma tried to change Adele, to educate her. But in so doing she clearly doesn't understand her.

Which comes to an analysis of the movie itself.

It is a classical rich-poor romance story. But instead of the American-dream infumed version of the story, we get a cynical, french depiction.

Emma tries to connect with the rural schick. Her last exhibit is presented in very oriental streets, that almost remind me of Jaffa.

Emma uses Adele to relate with this simpleton lifestyle. In all of her relationships, she is strong, in control, and she uses her girlfriends to tell her story.

Emma is open with her sexuality because her family is embracing, Adele hides her true identity because in her society she would be isolated and categorized.

Emma can study whatever she wishes, Adele needs to be practical.

She has the time to educate herself and discuss many worlds, Adele cannot, she has only her own experience to reflect upon.

And Emma doesn't understand why is she content with these lives, how can she live like that.

But is it better for Adele to dream big and see it get crushed?

Well sorta yes.

After all, when they break up, Emma bounces back but Adele is lost. Without anywhere to sleep, no one to love her or to understand her.

And yea, it is partially because of circumstances. Emma is far richer. But with these circumstances came the fact that Emma is groomed to live free.

And let's talk about grooming and praying in the gay community and why Emma is an awful person.

When I started to come out, I immediately joined the BDSM community.

When I had to move and lost my family, I digressed a lot.

I returned to my horse only when I met my rugby community.

A gay community gives you power, a place to discuss, to understand yourself better, friends to relate with and gossip who is dangerous within the community.

Two days ago I woke up a mess after 5h sleep and a lot of packing to do for my new flat.

Right in that morning, I received a message.

I met that girl in the philosophy common room.

She was an economics student. Like many other Bulgarians, she knew her way and got the code for the room from a friend to steal coffee, tea and food.

We became friends. She was always a powerful person, one of those Nietzchiens who understand everything as a power dynamic.

I told her my radical feminist theories and she was dazzled.

She graduated, moved to London, found a boyfriend and started dating.

It wasn't a common relationship.

That person was her feminized slave. I suggested to her that perhaps he was actually a she, but the person denied it. Until recently.

But she messaged me not to ask for help with her transitioning. The opposite, she was overwhelmed by the fact that her bae wants to transition and she wanted confirmation that her transitioning is wrong. I was horrified. That day, the Bulgarian convinced her bae not to go on hormones so she won't hurt her, and so the Bulgarian won't leave her.

In a society where people discover their sexuality and gender only in sexual surroundings, natural predators would abuse them as a means of gratification.

Adele could only discover her homosexuality in gay pick up bars. Emma naturally picked her up and raised her.

Adele, who didn't know anything gay other than Emma, relied on what Emma was willing to teach her.

Becoming Emma's toy, she was dependent upon her.

The first thing a gay person should do is find a community.

Although Emma tried to pamper Adele, pushing her to express herself in writing, she never introduced Adele to friends or to the community.

The only way Emma knew how to pamper Adele, was to try and make her a copy of herself. Which failed.

While the film attempts to escape the male gaze upon lesbians, it flirts very directly with the burgeois-gaze upon the poor and oriental.

Can that power dynamic be non-abusive? and if so, how?

We want to say that Emma should understand Adele's culture and embrace it as much as Adele needs to embrace Emma's.

But Adele's culture has unavoidable ugly aspects. It is grotesque, not refined, narrow-minded and closed. And it is a central aspect to her cultural as much as the other, beautiful, aspects are.

Do gays have any choice? Can you be gay and poor, gay and be part of the ethnic 'simpleton' culture? or are these aspects inherently negating?

My answer was to escape. I lived in poverty in the streets, away from my home, where I could define my own culture as a mix of orientalism, punk and classical beauty.

But not everyone is as lucky to do that.

When I write that 'hetero culture is boring' I fully say that I find it difficult to relate to Dejana. And part of me is sad because there are some morals and beauty in her world which I couldn't connect to.

For while I was attracted to my representation of her culture, I was not attracted to her, she was just a canvas for me, a cynical tool beyond my comprehension.

I could have found beauty in her only when I painted her in my own likening.

#blue is the warmest color #lesbianism #sapphic #blog #analysis #social critique #marxism

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mediaeval-muse · 4 years

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Book Review

Humankind: A Hopeful History. By Rutger Bregman. Translated by Elizabeth Manton and Erica Moore.New York: Little, Brown and Company, 2020.

Rating: 4/5 stars

Genre: non-fiction, sociology, psychology

Part of a Series? No

Summary: If one basic principle has served as the bedrock of bestselling author Rutger Bregman's thinking, it is that every progressive idea -- whether it was the abolition of slavery, the advent of democracy, women's suffrage, or the ratification of marriage equality -- was once considered radical and dangerous by the mainstream opinion of its time. With Humankind, he brings that mentality to bear against one of our most entrenched ideas: namely, that human beings are by nature selfish and self-interested. By providing a new historical perspective of the last 200,000 years of human history, Bregman sets out to prove that we are in fact evolutionarily wired for cooperation rather than competition, and that our instinct to trust each other has a firm evolutionary basis going back to the beginning of Homo sapiens. Bregman systematically debunks our understanding of the Milgram electrical-shock experiment, the Zimbardo prison experiment, and the Kitty Genovese "bystander effect." In place of these, he offers little-known true stories: the tale of twin brothers on opposing sides of apartheid in South Africa who came together with Nelson Mandela to create peace; a group of six shipwrecked children who survived for a year and a half on a deserted island by working together; a study done after World War II that found that as few as 15% of American soldiers were actually capable of firing at the enemy. The ultimate goal of Humankind is to demonstrate that while neither capitalism nor communism has on its own been proven to be a workable social system, there is a third option: giving "citizens and professionals the means (left) to make their own choices (right)." Reorienting our thinking toward positive and high expectations of our fellow man, Bregman argues, will reap lasting success. Bregman presents this idea with his signature wit and frankness, once again making history, social science and economic theory accessible and enjoyable for lay readers.

***Full review under the cut.***

Since this book is non-fiction (and thus, has no plot or characters), this review will be structured a little differently than usual.

Content Warning: references to racism, terrorism, violence, slavery

I first learned of Rutger Bregman when he famously made Tucker Carlson blow up on Fox News in 2019. Since then, I’ve kept my eye on Bregman’s Twitter account, eager to see how he would talk about various issues plaguing our world. When he announced this book, I was eager to pick it up, mostly because I was (and still am) in a pretty negative place, and I wanted something that would show me that “hopefulness” was a legitimate attitude to have, without the fake, peppy, self-help tone that permeates a lot of other publications.

Overall, I found Bregman’s general thesis and evidence compelling. Humankind argues that for the entirety of human history, humans are “hardwired” for compassion, kindness, and cooperation, rather than predisposed to selfishness and violence. Using examples from the hunter-gatherer era of human history to the 20th and 21st centuries, Bregman showcases anthropological, sociological, and psychological studies, rooting his case in scientific research rather than “wishful thinking.” I particularly found his section on “why good people turn bad” incredibly convincing, in part because he effectively dissects the connection between cynicism and power, as well as the (surprising and counter-intuitive) concept that empathy and xenophobia are two sides of the same coin.

All of this research is presented in a clearly-organized, playfully-written manner. I don’t know exactly how much can be attributed to Bregman versus his translators, but regardless, the book is infused with nice quips that don’t overwhelm the main points or overshadow the examples. Even the complex philosophy of Hobbes and Rousseau is presented in a way that the everyday reader can understand, as well as complicated histories such as the transition from hunter-gatherer to agricultural lifestyles.

My main criticism is perhaps the lack of direct address of ideologies that mean active harm towards others (things like white supremacy, homophobia, etc.). While Bregman discusses terrorism and has some examples pertaining to neo-Nazi rallies and the Afrikaner Volksfront, it was frankly hard for me to see a rationale for putting, say, lgbt+ people in contact with violent homophobes. Perhaps that isn’t what Bregman is advocating, but because I’m not sure, I think this book would have benefited from more concrete advice regarding reaching out to those who mean you real harm.

But as a general book about kindness and changing our view of human nature, I think this is an accessible read that most people can benefit from, particularly those who are rooted in cynicism and want to change their worldview. As a whole, I think this book speaks nicely to our present moments, and I think it provides a nice jumping-off point for deeper discussions about how we should respond to each other.

#book reviews

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romantichopelessly · 5 years

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Of Gifts and Love

A birthday gift for my awesome fantastic friend @sunshineandteddybears ! I hope you have an amazing day and year. Thank you for being such a good friend and person.

This got a bit out of hand. It’s Moxiety, and can be taken as romantic or platonic, so without further ado, enjoy!!! (the title is weird ignore it)

The first time that it happened was actually before Anxiety was truly ‘accepted’ by the others.

Virgil did not consider himself to be an artistic person by any means. At the time, he did not think much of himself at all, beyond what he had to do for Thomas and how that isolated him from his fellow sides.

It did not start out as a hobby, or even something that was particularly enjoyable for the dark aspect. He only began making the bracelets because the repetitive motion of the knot tying calmed him down after an anxiety attack.

When he had begun making the little bracelets, he had not even intended for anyone to see them. They were just a coping mechanism after all. They weren’t even very good. In fact, if it weren’t for Patton and Virgil’s own guilt complex, he doubted that anyone would have ever found out about them at all.

Not that Virgil felt as if he had done anything to Patton in particular that he had to be guilty about, but it seemed as if the more the moral side was nice to him, the more Virgil found himself wanting to repay him in some way.

That way just happened to lead to Virgil standing in the doorway leading to the kitchen in the mind palace just after they had finished filming “Making Some Changes”, a small strip of interwoven threads clutched tightly in his fingers. He watched nervously as Patton moved happily about the kitchen, humming softly to himself.

Taking a deep breath and steeling himself, Anxiety gingerly stepped into the room and figuratively into Morality’s territory. “Um… Patton..?” He cringed slightly at the wavering tone that his voice took, suddenly wishing to be anywhere but where he was.

But no. He had to do this. He had to do something to show Patton how much his… friendship… meant to him. And this was all that he had to offer. Because he wasn’t talented, he didn’t have anything to give any of them, he was just a disease-

Virgil’s self deprecating inner monologue was quickly cut off as Patton turned around with a wide smile on his face.

“Anxiety! Hiya, kiddo! What’s up?” Patton’s tone was light, happiness practically radiating off of the emotional side. It calmed Virgil somewhat. No matter what he thought of himself, Patton had always treated him just like he did the other two.

Virgil cleared his throat as Patton stepped away from the cookie dough that he had been stirring to turn his full attention to Virgil. “Well..” He averted his eyes from Patton’s deep chocolate brown, focusing instead on a point just over his shoulder. Apparently his hours of practicing in his room meant absolutely nothing as the words stuck uncomfortably in Virgil’s throat. “I wanted to…” Frustrated, his grip on the simple gift tightened. His next words came out quickly, almost gruffly. “I wanted to thank you. For, you know, being a good friend and not turning me into another person or whatever. So… just- here.”

Patton’s eyes widened as Virgil thrust whatever it was that he was holding into his chest, his hands scrambling to catch the small item before it fell to the ground as Virgil pulled back just as abruptly. Carefully, Patton opened his fist, revealing a thin, homemade bracelet. It was simple, with alternating stripes of light gray and bright blue thread.

Patton’s colors.

Virgil watched Patton with thinly veiled anxiety. He knew that the little bracelet was not much. It was not nearly as much as Patton deserved for not only putting up with Virgil, but also making attempt after attempt to make him feel welcome. The longer that Patton was silent, staring at the bracelet in his palm, the antsier Virgil got.

He was just about to say something and book it out of there when he noticed the tears welling in the corners of Patton’s eyes.

Eyes widening, Virgil held his hands up in surrender. “Patton, I- I know it’s not much, it was stupid, I-” Virgil’s words were instantly cut off as a pair of arms wrapped around his shoulders.

Virgil froze, all thoughts halting as Patton hugged him. He barely registered the soft sniffles coming from the other as he focused on the warm, overwhelming feeling of the hug that he was receiving. Just as he was about to relax into the comfort of Patton, however, he was pulling away, his eyes still watery, but a huge smile lighting up his freckled face.

“Kiddo! This is just- It’s just perfect.” Patton’s smile grew as the noticed the slight pink hue growing on Virgil’s cheeks. “And of course you’re welcome. Now, why don’t you help me tie it on! I’m never gonna bracelet it out of my sight!” Patton giggled, holding out his left wrist and the bracelet. “And then you can help me with these cookies!” He exclaimed as Virgil began to carefully tie the bracelet around Patton’s wrist.

That night, Virgil didn’t sleep, his mind far too preoccupied with trying to mentally recreate the feeling of his friend’s arms around him. Turning over in his bed and clutching his pillow to his chest, Virgil knew one thing.

He had to get Patton to hug him again.

----

The second time it happened was much later.

Virgil didn’t have much of a chance to make anything for Patton when he was stepping back from the videos, his job, and Thomas. Once the others came to get him, everything changed, and Virgil had to adjust to a new life where Thomas, Logan and Roman not only now knew his name, but all accepted him as an essential part of Thomas.

So, all in all, Virgil stopped making the bracelets, and went without physical contact of any sort for a while. Which would have been fine, if Virgil had been able to stop thinking about that single hug.

It turned out that less frequent anxiety attacks meant less need for a distracting activity like making bracelets. However, the closer that Virgil found himself growing with Roman and Logan, the more Virgil craved their casual sort of intimacy. Specifically with Patton.

So Virgil took his previous coping mechanism and turned it into a hobby. He began making the bands on good days. Sitting in his room, feeling content, Virgil would weave together the threads expertly, learning new techniques and patterns and trying out different colors. Roman even noticed Virgil’s new activity, and gifted him a box overflowing with brightly colored new threads, beads, and other jewelry making tools.

Virgil appreciated the gift, even if he knew that it was mostly fueled by guilt.

Of course, Virgil didn’t give his first attempts to Patton. No, his experiments were either quickly trashed or used for himself. If when he finally gave another bracelet to the bright side, it would have to be perfect, and it would have to be for good reason.

Virgil couldn’t allow himself to give Patton a gift just for his own selfish touch starved reasons.

So Virgil waited. And practiced. And waited some more.

His chance came after the next video. He found himself marveling at how at peace Patton had looked, wrapped in his Hufflepuff merchandise, his smile bright and sunshiny. As soon as Patton asked if they could wear the Hogwarts stuff and the new outfits full time, Virgil knew exactly what he was going to do.

His suddenly replenished sentimentality had nothing to do with Patton’s reaction to his new jacket. Absolutely nothing.

The new bracelet didn’t even take an hour to make, Virgil was working with such focus. It was more complicated than the first, with a diamond like pattern make of bright yellow and black thread. Without even giving himself time to think, Virgil was out his door and heading towards Patton’s room, holding the new bracelet carefully. He wasted no time in knocking on Patton’s door, his anxiety only appearing as the door remained closed, no sound to be heard on the other side.

Patton’s door was always open. Always. Or at least, if it was closed, it always took the moral side less than a minute to answer it. As Virgil stood there in front of the silent door, he began to twist and untwist the bracelet around his finger. Where was Patton? Was something wrong? Was this a bad time to bring another gift- of course it was, he shouldn’t even be here-

Suddenly the door was pulled open a crack, Patton’s face peeking out. “Yeah, kiddo? Did you need something?”

Virgil, though filled with relief at seeing Patton open the door unharmed, felt a pit of worry growing in the bottom of his stomach. There was something off here. Patton’s voice was wavering ever so slightly, his usual light tone just barely off the mark. Virgil could feel the hairs on the back of his neck rising as he noticed the slight redness around Patton’s eyes and the tip of his nose.

“Pat? Are you okay?” Virgil asked, momentarily forgetting his reason for being there.

“Yeah! I’m great, Virge!” Patton’s smile widened, and Virgil tried to unsee the brittle edges of that smile. “I’m just a peachy Patton! Is there something I can help you with?”

Virgil hesitated, wavering between asking again if something was wrong and just doing what he came here to do. Biting his lip, Virgil settled on the latter.

He trusted Patton to tell him if he really needed anything.

Tentatively, Virgil held out the yellow and black bracelet, his other hand stuffed in his hoodie pocket, plucking on a loose thread. “I.. I just made you another thing. Because you can’t wear all the Harry Potter stuff. It’s Hufflepuff. So… yeah…” Virgil trailed off, wishing that he had scripted something to say rather than trying to wing it like this.

This time, when Patton’s eyes filled with tears, Virgil wasn’t as shocked. He was surprised even more by how quickly he was pulled in for a tight hug. Patton squeezed him like a lifeline, and Virgil shivered at the long craved contact. He was just about to wrap his arms around Patton’s middle when the other spoke, his voice muffled, buried in Virgil’s shoulder.

“It’s perfect, Virgil. I love it. Thank you.” And then Patton was pulling back, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. He took the bracelet that Virgil was still holding out and stepped back into his room, the tiniest, thankfully genuine, smile on his face.

Virgil decided to count his blessings and get out of there while he was ahead. It was obvious that Patton had something that he wanted to attend to in his room anyway. Stepping back as well, Virgil shoved his hand back into his pocket and nodded, giving Patton a half smile in response. “You’re welcome.”

----

After that, the bracelet giving became more and more frequent.

Virgil couldn’t quite shake what he had seen with Patton in his room. Obviously he was bound to worry- he worried about all of them, he was Anxiety- but for whatever reason, Patton’s odd behavior stuck with him and nagged at him in the back of the mind for days.

His worries were resolved after the next few videos, though.

Or, they weren’t resolved, because Virgil would never be able to rest knowing that Patton was in actual turmoil and didn’t think that he could tell anyone, but at least his worries were validated.

It honestly didn’t feel any better.

It certainly didn’t help that he was the only one that hadn’t given Patton a gift after the whole ordeal, either. Even Logan had given something to Patton, though it was more of an apology gift than anything.

As soon as he could, Virgil began his new project. This bracelet was a bit more intricate than the last two. It had three colors instead of the usual two, red, purple and dark blue, with a charm in the shape of a puppy hanging in the middle. It wasn’t much, not compared to real conjured puppy, or a brand new hoodie, but Virgil knew somehow that Patton would appreciate it nevertheless.

He was correct. When Virgil gave the new bracelet to Patton, he was greeted with yet another warm hug. There were no tears this time, only a soft, genuine smile and a real light in Patton’s eyes that lifted Virgil’s spirits more than any bigger or flashier gift ever could have. Virgil almost allowed himself to hug back that time, but found himself frozen in Patton’s arms as a simple, “I love you, you adorable little muffin,” was whispered into the fabric of his hoodie.

Those words spurred Virgil into a new frenzy.

He sped up his pace, making more and more bracelets for the moral side, each unique in pattern, color, charms and beads.

A red and green bracelet for Christmas.

A light purple one for the time Patton helped him through an anxiety attack.

A green and orange one with a ‘P’ charm for Patton’s birthday.

A pink and red one that was a bit messy post Patton’s return after Deceit’s trick.

A black and white one with the words “Dynamicest Duo” threaded into it.

Each one was met with a much welcomed hug and thanks, and Virgil found that he couldn’t get enough.

However, the others were beginning to notice. Roman had outright asked about the menagerie of handmade bracelets decorating Patton’s arms, and Virgil had only barely managed to avoid answering his rather persistent questions. Logan hadn’t said anything to Virgil directly, but he could see the pointed looks and calculated glances that he sent Virgil and the jewelry. And although Patton never said anything, Virgil was sure that he was catching on as well.

The thought terrified the anxious side. It wasn’t as if any of them would be mad at him if he explained his reasoning. Making gifts for a person in seek of getting a hug wasn’t exactly a dastardly plan, though he didn’t doubt that a year and a half ago Roman would have been able to make it look as if it was.

Nevertheless, admitting how much he cared about Patton and craved his soft touch scared Virgil to no end. Though, try as he might, Virgil couldn’t see a way out of admitting it. It was either stop giving Patton the bracelets at all and risk a complete lack of hugs for the foreseeable future, or admit his true intentions and risk a few awkward moments.

He knew that it likely wouldn’t be more than that. Patton was understanding and loved that mushy stuff.

Right?

That’s what Virgil told himself, over and over again as he stood in front of Patton’s door once again, his hand poised to knock. He was just edging on his third minute of standing still and staring at the door when it swung open before him to reveal Patton, his eyes wide with surprise.

“Virgil! I… I wasn’t expecting you to be here.” Virgil straightened up as Patton opened the door fully, a smile falling over his features as the shock wore off. “What’s up, b- buddy?” The nickname was awkward, the two of them still adjusting to Virgil’s more vocal discomfort with the innocent nicknames.

It may be a bit bumbling for a while, but Virgil was beyond glad that he had spoken up. It was important to him that Patton see him as an equal, and not a little angel.

Taking a deep breath, Virgil let himself relax. Patton was trying to respect him in the way that he needed and the two were closer than ever before. This would be okay.

Gently, Virgil pulled a dark purple and black bracelet from his pocket, looking up to meet Patton’s eyes before he spoke. “I made you another one.” He could see the light growing in Patton’s eyes so he held up a finger before the other could talk. “I should… probably confess something first. I’ve been making these, yeah, because you’re a good friend, but I- I also-”

Patton reached out and carefully lowered Virgil’s finger, his eyes kind and deep. “You want a hug?”

Virgil’s cheeks instantly flamed red, his eyes widening. “Wh- I- How did you know that I-”

Patton giggled, taking the bracelet from Virgil’s other hand. “I’m not as oblivious as Logan thinks I am, Virge.”

“I know that, I just…”

“You thought you were being sneaky.” Patton smiled, opening his arms. “But you don’t have to ask to get a hug.”

Virgil only hesitated for a second before stepping forward and into Patton’s arms. It was warm and comforting like always, like coming home. He was just nestling into the hug when Patton spoke again.

“I love you, V.”

“...I love you too, Pat.” And Virgil finally wrapped his arms around Patton’s middle and hugged him back.

#moxiety #patton sanders #virgil sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #sanders sides #sanders side fic #!!! jen ily #happy birth #ALSO I HAVENT REALLY PROOFREAD IM S O R R Y

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felicebellcarousel · 4 years

Text

Allow Me to Introduce ‘A Lady of Independent Means’

Now before we dive into this little Pride and Prejudice variation I’d to take this opportunity to state that although this work (A Lady of Independent Means) is inspired by the timeless Jane Austen classic, the rights to this specific work are reserved to the author, and that any unauthorised reproduction or publishing of any part of content is prohibited.

Chapter 1

Dear Miss Bingley,

I write to express my deep regrets that myself and my family find ourselves unable to attend the Ball, to which you most graciously extended us an invitation.

Do not be alarmed, my friend. I am well, but sadly the same cannot be said of my Uncle Gardiner.

As you may recall my mother has a widowed Brother residing in London, we have received news that his health in is a most precarious state; grave in fact. So instead of spending the day preparing for your ball – which I am sure will be the pinnacle of the Hertfordshire social calendar –I find myself packing to journey to town within the hour.

Thither shall also go Elizabeth, the both of us escorted by Papa. Oh my dear friend, although Lizzy declares it foolish of me, I cannot help but entertain the hope that the accounts of my relations danger have been greatly exaggerated, and this trip may yet have a positive outcome.

The discouraging news has laid Mama exceedingly low and unfit fit for travel –or to attend amusements. Moreover we take the family carriage leaving Mary, Kitty and Lydia without transportation or parental escort to this evening’s festivities.

Enclosed I have included our direction in town, I know not how long we will be gone from the neighbourhood and dearly hope you will write me. Time grows short, with much yet to prepare. I will close by saying: I am exceedingly sorry for any disruption our absence may cause, please convey my sincere regrets to your brother and Mrs. Hurst.

Yours Sincerely,

J. Bennet

~~~~%~~^0^~~%~~~~

“The rudeness! To drop an engagement on the very same day they were to be expected. Country manners for you,” decried Miss Bingley, seconded by a nod and murmur from Mrs Hurst.

For once Fitzwilliam Darcy could not tune out Miss Bingley’s sycophantic babble. Her harsh words lanced his very heart, filling him with an acute sense of loss and regret.

Very deliberately and slowly he placed his half empty coffee cup onto the crisp linen tablecloth, keeping his face diverted from his company until he could be certain of its expression.

So this is how their story would end? He owned dejectedly that it could never have been the epic romance his heart had craved. No, his head was attached to firmly to his head to allow such a passionate fancy to determine his future life and family legacy. As hard as his heart had tugged, it could not lead him to make a woman, so far beneath him - no matter how delightful – a permanent fixture to in his life.

If he could not spend the sum of his days waking up curled around the beautiful Elizabeth Darcy he had at least hoped to share a dance with the unspoiled Elizabeth Bennet. Hold her dainty little hand in his, or perhaps even for a span of moments, feel her delightful form rest on his arm, if he were able to secure a set featuring such a movement. But it seemed he was to be cruelly denied this infinitesimal consolation along with the chance to say goodbye.

He would return to his life in London, again mingle only within his own confining set of privileged acquaintance, probably take some insipid society miss to wife in a year or so, and one day forget the little wood nymph that had made his soul sing.

A glance to the far end of the dining table showed Bingley to be similarly effected by the news, but less able to conceal his disappointment. He’d pushed his plate, laden with greasy delicacies away to stare out the window. The twitching of his lips showed him to be deep in thought, but gave few clues to the finer nuances of the musings. Gazing down at his own plate, barely touched, Darcy was struck with the thought that things had progressed to a very dangerous point, perhaps more than he had reckoned…

Was he so love sick that he could not stomach a few mouthfuls breakfast? He forced a forkful of eggs past his lips, but the food, savoury and pleasant just minutes ago, now tasted like ashes and disappointment.

Laying down his fork with the same care with which he had deposited the coffee mug, Darcy raised his eyes only to encounter Miss Bingely’s smirking countenance across the table. Likely she was the only one in her discernment privy to his shameful and overwhelming pain, but it was still one witness too many and a witness entirely too gleeful.

Miss Bingley looked directly into his eyes, her own green orbs bright with enjoyment. Her fish like lips were parted in a disgusting parody of arousal, but it was not desire that fuelled her expression. Rather vindictive enjoyment of his pain and her own elation at having a rival so neatly struck from the field of battle.

In that moment he hated her, perhaps he even reviled her more than that blackguard Wickham. They were like two faces of the same coin Caroline Bingley and George Wickham; both selfish to the very core, their only concept of morals being a dispassionate assessment of how much they could get away with before inciting censure, rather than any true affinity with right and wrong.

Fortunately in Miss Bingley’s circumstances, she was locked in the mischief she could cause. Under the charge of Charles Bingley, she was forced to exercise maidenly restraint in pursuing her aims. Her Brother, while malleable up to a point, could be as stubborn as a badger if he felt the principles of fairness or justice to be in peril.

It was not just the power he held over her finances, Charles’s naturally gregarious personality had opened doors rarely accessible to an entire family whose fortune was still polluted by the miasma of trade, Darcy’s society included.

“I am sure they would have delayed if they could, perhaps we should call upon them in London. See if there is any assistance in our power to offer or merely let them know we harbour no hard feelings. You did mention an enclosed direction did you not…. Caroline?” Bingley called his sisters name loudly at the last, clearly impatient to hear her response.

Darcy watched Miss Bingley’s eyes widen in panic, she sharply took in a horrified breath. The only thing worse than Mr Bingley dangling after Miss Jane Bennet in Hertfordshire would be for her brother to be seen publicly dangling after the girl in the view of their London acquaintance.

Darcy could readily determine the direction of Caroline’s thoughts, because in route they mirrored his own although their concerns regarding the match proceeded from different quarters: Darcy wanted to see if his friend well established in society for Bingley’s personal happiness, while Caroline saw her brothers marriage and societal aspirations only in terms of how they helped—or hindered—her own ambitions.

Bingley’s attentions to Miss Bennet thus, had been so pointed that if he continued in this vein a proposal must be forthcoming or censure and derision would be cast upon him for his inconsistency and the blameless girl for disappointed hopes. The Bingley family’s position in society remained tenuous and was based almost entirely on Bingley’s gentlemanly deportment; should he be seen to act the cad, even only to a country squires daughter, the family would find it nigh in impossible to secure the type of match with the potential to elevate his standing, despite Bingley’s stable wealth.

The other possibility, that Bingley could succeed in wooing Miss Bennet, did not bear thinking of, yet demanded to be examined. Jane Bennet - while undeniable beautiful - could bring nothing of value to such a match.

Through pointed questioning around the neighbourhood Caroline Bingley had determined that the Bennet girls had portions were so tiny as to be non-existent: A mere £50 per year during their father’s life and an equal share of £5000 upon their mother’s demise (if the vulgar woman had not the opportunity to squander it before).

Pointed questioning of the girl herself had uncovered her limited and unsavoury connections.

“An Uncle, actively engaged in trade!” Caroline had cried in relish, at this very same table, the morning after Miss Bennet had taken ill. Bingley distressingly loyal to the woman he had known for such a brief span, had leapt to her defence, saying she would not value her a jot less if she had a battalion complete of Uncles in trade. Miss Bingley had produced an unmistakably snide smile before attempting to coax her brother over to her way of thinking. “Yes I suppose a tradesman, quite well to grass, within the family would not be such a great shame, but Jane told me he keeps a house in Cheapside! Cheapside! If one must be in trade, one ought to be good at it, rather than drag the rest of the family down with ineffectual business pursuits. But I suppose we can expect little more of a blood relation of women of Mrs Bennet’s and Mrs Phillip’s ilk.”

Though reluctant to support any notion originating from Miss Bingley, Darcy could not help but agree that Jane Bennet was an unsuitable marriage prospect for his good friend, and had said as much. Darcy had pointed out the evils of attaching oneself to a family who had shown so little comportment to date, arguing this to be a far greater concern than the social standing and wealth the Bennet family lacked.

Before they had been able to importune the beleaguered lover any further Miss Elizabeth Bennet had been announced. The dark eyed beauty had driven every thought of Bingley’s romantic woes clean out of Darcy’s head. Her hair was blowsy, her skirt muddy, her complexion very flushed and yet her person was the most breathtakingly beautiful thing Darcy had ever beheld.

She had surveyed the room boldly, daring anyone to comment on her appearance before asking after her sister. Darcy had quickly dredged up every objection against girl, real or imagined, to prevent him from following her up the stairs.

That she had barely spared him a glance did nothing to cool his ardour, neither those weeks ago nor now. If he didn’t remain strong Elizabeth would make him her slave. Could his resolve continue to hold in the face of the many intimate meetings that must follow a closer connection between Jane Bennet and Charles Bingley? And if he did manage to avoid the allure of his friends new sister, there could not help but be a greater price of misery to be payable.

So? What do you think?

More of ‘A Lady of Independent Means’ will be posted on my Patreon page. https://www.patreon.com/FeliceBell

But to answer what you really want to know. Yes, a new chapter of Reluctantly Mrs Darcy is nearly ready to go! Nearly!

Thanks for reading,

#aladyofindependentmeans reluctantlymrsdarcyfeliceb

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prettywordsyouleft · 5 years

Text

Different Kisses with Kyungsoo

Thank you @vnrgaard and @nyx-goddess-of-choas (requested privately) for requesting Kyungsoo’s kisses! I figured since today is his birthday, it would make complete sense to fulfil this request now – not only do we get some stellar kissing with Soo today, but it means I’ve ticked off another request on my list so it’s a win/win! I feel like I went really in-depth in some points because Kyungsoo is my ultimate bias and I have no chill, but I hope you enjoy the extra content all the same! I didn’t do the conclusion like I usually do as this is already longer than usual!

(I’m sorry I couldn’t help but use this gif even though it’s missing his face >_>)

When Kyungsoo kisses you it’s as if nothing else matters in the world anymore.

First kiss:

Your first kiss with Kyungsoo was a long time coming and yet still blind-sighted you. He was a regular at the boutique movie theatre and café your family ran, appearing at least three times a month to watch old films at the last viewing time of the night. He’d always come to that last viewing, and in the beginning, it used to irk you as hardly anyone would come that late at night and you could close up if no tickets were bought. Soon, you knew his order well, smiling at him happily when you saw him. At first, he wasn’t one to talk after asking for a ticket and his snacks, his eyes darting away whenever you caught his gaze. After a couple of months though, he started asking about your day, shyly making basic conversation with you until it didn’t feel awkward any more. You would laugh with him, he would tell you about some of the things he had been up to or about his dogs. You loved animals and this was where your conversation really deepened, once you had an established common ground, you discovered more about each other as you got his snacks ready each time.

Sometimes you would sneak into the theatre with the guise of quietly cleaning up the aisles behind him, and you would find yourself more entranced by the man who appeared for the late night session and had the most beautiful round eyes that looked out at you warmly from behind thick-rimmed glasses.

“Why don’t you just sit down and watch it with me?” he said one time when you were cleaning, not looking over his shoulder at you, but all too aware of how close you were. You had sat behind him and watched on, but not at the movie. From that moment on, you started coming in to watch with him. You’d sit in the same row and then finally next to him, analysing the movies together and discussing your thoughts when it ended. You highly anticipated Kyungsoo’s appearances and the feeling that would overwhelm you every time his hand would brush against yours in the popcorn he shared with you or if his knee hit yours. You were falling for the dark-haired man, and you didn’t know what to do about it.

The feeling was mutual for Kyungsoo. Even as someone who was an avid movie enthusiast, he had blurred the lines of why he came to this theatre over time. Initially, he liked the feeling of being in the older styled theatre to watch the classics in. The atmosphere was enticing, but your smile was better. He felt juvenile whenever he approached you; wanting to tell you how beautiful you were but not wanting to scare you off either. The growth of your relationship made him more frustrated, you could discuss everything together except the obvious feelings you both held. He wanted to make you his, to tell you that he dreamt of you and how your smile was embedded in his mind. But every time he’d think of how to tell you this, to utter the words he had practised so many times aloud at home as if lines for his own acting, he’d feel as if the words got lodged in this throat and wouldn’t come out. He’d simply stare at your smiling face dumbly until you finally got up out of your chair and gestured that the session was over. Another wasted chance.

After seven months of visiting the theatre, the sessions were no longer enjoyable. It was heightened, the tension thick as each slightest movement caused friction. He couldn’t concentrate on the movie and when you moved your leg it made him groan. You asked if he was okay and he stood up immediately, preparing to leave. You got up as well and grabbed his arm, looking at him with concern. None of the words wanted to work, but his lips knew what needed to happen, finding yours and kissing you with demand. He had hoped for a soft, tender moment for the first kiss, but he was desperate to let the feelings that had been pressing against his ribcage all night long out. It surprised him when you kissed him back with just as much energy, holding onto his shirt to ground you in the moment.

When you both pulled away breathlessly, there were still no words shared, but the smiles you gave each other – mixed with sheer happiness and relief – made you both realise how much the other had wanted this for a long time.

Public kisses:

Kyungsoo is the king of fleeting subtle touches when in public. He’s not going to outwardly show any PDA towards you except holding your hand, but he’s definitely still active in expressing his affection for you. His most common move is brushing his hand against the small of your back unexpectedly as he walks by you, looking discreetly over his shoulder to see your reaction. He likes playing with how much pressure he holds your hand with as well, to let you know he’s thinking about more than just walking at your side pleasantly. These unexpected (even after all this time they still surprise you even though you anticipate it) gestures make your heart beat faster and you smile up at him warmly, Kyungsoo knowing just how much you love when he does this to you. Sometimes you try to give him little messages back and watch as his cheeks flush as he tries to keep his expression nonchalant. You know all too well that he’s dying on the inside as you do and the look he gives you makes you very aware that when at home he’s going to hold you to him for some time so you best forget about any plans you had.

Despite not really showing your relationship off with PDA, you’re not a stay-at-home couple either. You go out when you can, mostly to try new restaurants that Kyungsoo is too excited over or to watch movies at theatres other than your own – of course, you still go there too for special occasions. A lot of your dates occur at night time which seems to suit Kyungsoo, as if the darkened atmosphere brings less attention to him and allows him more chances to touch, smile and gaze at you adoringly.

And if you can’t get out properly, night drives are definitely a thing. With the tinted glass on his car, he has no worries about placing his hand on your thigh or encasing your hand in his, lots of light conversation and sweet gazes or gestures occupying the space as you travel around mindlessly. You have to admit, you love nothing more than watching him drive and snuggling up into the passenger chair with some part of you touching him, sometimes allowing things to grow to an insatiable level, with a strong desire to get back home and make sure your love is heard all around the bedroom.

Private kisses:

Being together at home is one of Kyungsoo’s favourite things. He loves all the time he gets to spend with you, but there’s nothing more that speaks to him than doing the most mundane domestic things together. For him, it shows promise for your future together as a married couple, and he takes great pride in establishing good routines now as you are dating. He is methodical and diligent, and your home shows this whenever he is not away. You admit that you’re not nearly as onto things cleaning wise as he is, but he’s definitely improved your attempts with how easily he can get you enthused to help him with tasks around the house. The kitchen is his baby though, and cooking together is the highlight of most days. Sometimes he allows you to assist him, teaching you recipes so you can make them when he’s away, and others you merely assist by watching him in his element and handing him the seasoning or something. Either way, the kitchen makes Kyungsoo’s pride shine and it’s so attractive that you cannot help but move to give him a back hug and kiss him when he turns around, telling him how attractive Chef Soo really is. It makes him beam shyly but he continues with more vigour, satisfied he makes meals that touch you with his efforts and for their impeccable taste.

He is a hopeless romantic and a bit of a love-fool when it comes to you. Whilst out in public he barely touches you, at home cuddles are a big thing. He loves holding you to him, even going as far as making you sit between his legs as you both read your own books/scriptures to feel connected to you at all times. Kisses to the top of your head are mindlessly placed upon you, and you angle your head to peck his neck in response, sometimes stopping for a deeper kiss and then smiling at each other. He’s not super clingy though and can allow you to do your own thing without disrupting you, knowing how important it is to have your own individual time too. All the same, if you’re in the same space, his eyes often trail off his own task and over to you, random compliments being delivered to you when you least expect it. He is gentlemanly, and takes really good care of you, ensuring all your needs are met and cares a great deal for your health too. He still courts you to this day, pressing the doorbell some nights instead of coming inside and thrusts your favourite flowers at you with a knowing smile on his face. Even after all this time, you can excite each other well, the romance between you only growing in its flames, not dying off.

Making out:

Kyungsoo worships you physically and making out sessions are passionate and sensual. They aren’t planned, there’s no obvious one size fits all trigger like with some idols I’ve written for, it could be as simple as seeing you in his favourite colour on you, or watching you do something mindlessly that makes his heart beat faster and he has to grab you. Likewise, you have your own weaknesses for Kyungsoo and will be unable to resist kissing him yourself in those moments too. Admittedly, you do spend a lot of time on the sofa, so it seems like this is the most obvious location for make-out sessions. All the same, when a making out session is initiated there is a need to establish it, your lips entangling as quickly as your hands are fumbling for more of each other. Touching heightens the experience and Kyungsoo loves nothing more than playing with the tempo. clearly he doesn’t mind messing up his own tempo omg I am so lame. Slow and sensual means he can drag out each kiss he places upon your body as his hands run over you slowly, excruciatingly so. Then when he has you begging for more, he’ll oblige in picking it back up, crashing his mouth against yours whilst your bodies grind, press and grip at each other in response. There is no way things are cooling down any time soon, and even if there isn’t a lot of time between whatever is scheduled next, he’ll make sure the ultimate high is reached. Granted, most of the time there’s nothing on and Kyungsoo can take charge of that tempo all day and night long if he wants to.

I have a subheader for you all too:

Stressed kisses: When stressed, the need for physical connection to ground him sometimes outweighs the usual sensual desire that comes with making out. Movements are harder, rougher, Kyungsoo’s hands feel as if they’re gripping right inside of you. It’s never cruel, and whilst a lot of people enjoy writing Kyungsoo as a dom, this is as far as I see it going. His need for you is evident with the demand of his lips on yours, bruising you and biting at your bottom lip to hear you moan. Travelling your body and leaving several love bites on you and feeling your own desperation for more will turn his mood softer, now anchored in the realm of pleasure and not so much on why he had needed you in the first place. His fast-paced and hard actions decrease and you know you’ve helped him overcome some of his frustrations, now needing to deal with the ones you share from the sexual tension.

Morning kisses:

Since Kyungsoo’s favourite way to fall asleep is with you spooned against him and an arm draped over your waist, it makes sense you generally wake up in this position too, squinting when you feel the sun filtering through the gap in the curtains. He often stirs around the same time as you do, planting a kiss on the top of your head and tightening his grip around your waist. You love the mornings with Kyungsoo, his voice is huskier and lower than usual which you still can’t get used to, a giddy smile crossing your lips as he greets you quietly. There is no immediate move from either of you to face one another, content in the way you can reach his shoulder and upper arm if you angle your head to kiss him, and his own lips find their way to the nape of your neck, kissing the soft skin near your ear. Sometimes he’ll playfully chuckle or talk when he’s this close, knowing that you’ll shudder in delight at the heaviness of his voice there as you sleepily chat with each other. Eventually, you’ll turn around in his arms and be greeted with those heart-shaped lips spreading into a lazy grin before he reaches forward to kiss you tenderly, playing with your hair until the alarm goes off. And as much as you want to remain entangled in each other for the rest of the morning, you’re both pretty good at getting up and organising each other for the day, lots of gentle caresses and endless smiles shared over breakfast.

I will say that since there is a sensual way to how your mornings start, especially since Kyungsoo is always enamoured with how beautiful you are first thing when you wake up, there is a definite chance of forgoing the morning pillow-talk for morning sex. He can’t help himself, he’s so in love with you and having you in his arms is already so intimate for him. You both love starting the morning out with your bodies connected in intricate pleasure.

Making up:

Due to the mutual belief that communication makes a relationship stronger, you don’t fight often. This doesn’t make you entirely immune to arguments, but you definitely don’t have as many as some couples I’ve written for due to the prompt approach of dealing with things. Kyungsoo’s biggest “fault” would be that he’s a workaholic and takes on a lot of side projects that keep him away from home most of the time. Much like in Hanbin’s kisses – another workaholic – this does sometimes cause insecurities in the relationship. There is no doubt that you both love each other but the lack of time you have sometimes for your relationship strains it and this is where the majority of your fights stem from. You want more of his time and to not feel second place to his job. Of course, he understands you but it frustrates him all the same as he does the best he can by you. You knew when you started dating what you were getting into, and being the honest type, he is as transparent as he can be with his schedule so you know what’s going on in his world all the time. But that’s the problem, you know about him but you feel like he doesn’t know what’s happening in yours enough. He’s not there when you got a promotion in your new job to celebrate it with you, or when you’ve had a hard day and you could really appreciate more than a five-minute phone call with him to calm you. You try to understand it because he’s been like this from the start and is really attentive to you, but some days your insecurities get the best of you.

Fighting with Kyungsoo is logical even with his temper attached; he knows how to throw it all back at you with little room to argue it rationally. You get defensive and say petty things back until you’re both too overwhelmed to continue and silence fills the room. You’ll generally escape to cry and he’ll sit and brood over it for some time, wondering where he went wrong. How he can make you feel as important to him as he thought you already knew. Being the perfectionist he is, Kyungsoo will see it as he’s failed you despite it just being the situation’s stressors. Eventually, he’ll come and find you in the darkened bedroom or bathroom, silently pulling you into his arms and holding you tightly as you whisper how sorry you are for being insecure. He’ll tell you not to do that right then and wait until you’re both calm to approach new tactics to help your relationship, but until then, you’re both entangled in each other. Kisses are sporadic but deeper than most, your still heightened emotions being the reason for the needy tone in the way you’re kissing one another in apology.

Practice kisses:

I love writing this for idols that act because it’s always a fun section. A great way to involve you in his projects is by practising lines with you from his drama or movie work, helping Kyungsoo perfect his delivery with someone he feels at ease with. Since you have a similar appreciation for the visual arts, you also like going through his lines with him. Kyungsoo puts his all into it even when it’s just you two and it’s like you’re getting a premiere of what you’ll see displayed on a screen in the near future. You don’t just love all the romantic parts, but the drama and the way he can naturally make you shed tears as if you were the main character yourself that you’re speaking for.

Kyungsoo finds it adorable how invested you get in the storyline too, and it’s him who breaks character first, grinning at you as you wipe your tears aside or get really frustrated by what is happening in the scene. “God, you’re so cute,” he mutters and you whine that he’s interrupted your best work yet, his smile growing as he takes you in his arms. He apologises with his lips, kissing you softly and stealing your breath much like he does your heart whenever he acts with you. You have to admit, you aren’t as upset from him breaking from the script and sometimes it encourages you to forgo the fictional world you’ve been steadily involved in for some time, focusing on your own with Kyungsoo instead.

Demanding kisses:

Since a lot of your time together is still movie/drama related, it’s not uncommon for you to watch a lot of things together at night. The difference from when you binge on k-dramas by yourself and when you watch with Kyungsoo is how he critics the acting. It’s a never-ending learning session for him on how he can improve as an actor, and like how we mentioned it in his making up section, this workaholic uses all the tools he can to analyse his own performance. But you just want to enjoy the time together, to snuggle up and not see the mental notes he’s taking from the serious expression on his face. He gets so wrapped up in watching that he sometimes isn’t as aware of you at his side as he should be. Irritated, you let out a heavy sigh before demanding his attention, curling up further into his side and reaching to place your lips on his neck. You’ll hardly receive a reaction out of him sometimes, but with your hand now over his waist and kisses being pressed up to his jawline, his attention shifts to you. The hard gaze he gives you makes you send him a challenging one back and he smirks, grabbing your face and holding you there as he kisses you passionately. Somehow you’ve ended up in his lap and this has a high probability of heading towards a make-out session – not that either of you really mind. But he’ll pull back and give you a look which makes you sheepishly shrug at him before he takes your mouth hostage again, the analysing all forgotten about, unless it’s over how well you’re kissing now. Way to make him stop, and reap the rewards too!

Jealous kisses:

Kyungsoo is naturally protective of you, and it can sometimes come across as a little possessive. He’s not going to control you or prevent you from living your own life, but you are his significant other in his eyes and if someone so much and tries to make a move on you or is overly friendly in front of him, they’re going to feel the intensity of his death glare even from across the room. Depending on the situation, he’ll act accordingly to social protocol but once he’s got you away from the situation he’ll kiss you hard, to settle his heightened emotions down. Half the time you’re not sure why he gets so jealous when he knows just how much you love him, but secretly you kind of like when he kisses you like this, as if he’s claiming your lips and soul as his. Like they aren’t already.

Small note – you get along really well with his EXO members but if one of them gets too much and makes him jealous of the attention you’re giving them, he’ll smack them down, no questions asked.

Scolding/nagging kisses:

Kyungsoo is a bit of a nagger. He likes things done a specific way and you’re not always going to match that. If you’re clumsy or get sick after his strict instructions to always wear a scarf when it’s cold out, he’s naturally going to scold you for it. He’s not overly rude about it but he can irritate you and make you feel like you can’t do anything for yourself when you have bouts of clumsiness and he’s treating your wounds whilst telling you off for not thinking it through. You pout heavily and mutter that we can’t all be perfect like him, which annoys him and you know it. Kyungsoo is self-critical and sees himself as far from perfect, so using that word rubs him the wrong way, especially when the person he loves the most in this world is hurt and he’s worried for you.

But most of the time, you can handle his scolding ways with a kiss, as if you’re healing his worries about you. Whilst he’s tending to your sprained ankle and telling you off for the umpteenth time for not looking where you walk or something of the like, you reach over for his face, stopping the nagging midway and kiss him firmly. He’s rather surprised and his lips only half pucker up into the kiss, blinking at you in confusion when you pull away. “I know you mean well, Soo, but can you just let me bask in your affections and not be scolded for being clumsy yet again?” He’ll sheepishly bite back any remaining words he has, nodding at you as a small smile played on his lips. You are too charming at times for him.

Exhausted or reassuring kisses:

Naturally, Kyungsoo exudes manliness and mannerisms that are suited to leading you within the relationship. And whilst you’re capable of being bold and a go-getter yourself, you don’t actually mind Kyungsoo’s protective approach to your relationship. But it isn’t unbalanced at all. Whilst he’s not always going to have long conversations about his feelings with you, and chooses to show his love as opposed to uttering it to you all the time, he doesn’t hesitate to know when he needs to rely on you. He has no shame in openly showing his weaknesses to you and letting you take control too. It’s rather exuberant to be the person who can hold Do Kyungsoo up when he is exhausted or needing reassurance.

You can tell when he needs you as soon as he’s walked through the door, the way his movements are different from usual. There’s no ease to even the smallest task and you’re already waiting for him when he finally comes up into the apartment, diving into your waiting arms and holding you tightly to him. There’s an added weight as he leans against you for support and your hands gently rub over his back to comfort him. He doesn’t always explain why he’s tired; most of it’s self-explanatory from his work. He definitely doesn’t need you to point that out and you never do, instead, you lead him down to your bedroom slowly, helping him out of his excess layers and into bed. When he wakes up next, he’s so thankful for the care you showed him, staring at you sleeping beside him quietly and reaches over to brush your hair away from your face so he can gaze at you further. Sometimes you stir and he’s instantly apologetic but you don’t mind, smiling gently at him as you move your hand to cup his cheek lovingly. Soft and gentle kisses are delivered in short bursts, Kyungsoo feeling so encased in your love that he’s rather speechless. You smile and tell him no words are needed, that you’re always going to be here for him and nuzzle him gently, telling him to rest up and let the worry and weariness of the day go.

Night kisses:

I just mentioned how he’s not so forthcoming with love confessions all the time, but the one place you can expect them is in bed at night time. Much like your dates being in the dark, it seems like when the lights are out he can openly discuss all the thoughts within his head with you. He has never shied away from telling you about the future he hopes to have with you, getting married and having children are often discussed during these sessions. But he doesn’t stop just there, telling you of how much he needs you and relies on you at his side. How much he’s dreamed of you and him, of times when you’re old and grey together, and as soon as what he wants to achieve with you in the next six months too. Kyungsoo is incredibly thoughtful and affected by your place in his world. All of these words seem more intricate than if they were to be mentioned during the day and you appreciate night time pillow-talk like this with Kyungsoo, mentioning your own dreams you have for your future together. It’s so intense that the words will peter out and instead be replaced with sensual touching and kisses; drinking up each other’s desires for all that you had just envisioned together and becoming completely intoxicated. This is definitely going to end in a night full of lovemaking, and bringing you one day closer to everything you both dream of.

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Other EXO members: Suho // Yixing // Chen // Chanyeol // Kyungsoo // Sehun

[Different Kisses Masterlist] | [Main Masterlist] | [Request Guidelines]

#do kyungsoo #kyungsoo #ksoo #exo #exo imagines #exo scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kyungsoo imagines #kyungsoo scenarios #boyfriend! kyungsoo #pwyl; different kisses #prettywordsyouleft requested

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alethia000 · 5 years

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[TRANS] 190911 Nichkhun’s Interview with The Cloud

Virtue

Story by Chernporn Kongma

11 September 2019

[Thai-Eng Trans by Daffodil0624]

A conversation with Nichkhun Horvejkul, a shy boy who has become a member of a popular Korean idol group 2PM, on his role as Friend of UNICEF who encourages children to be fascinated by letters in ‘Every Child Can Read’ Project.

“Eleven years of hard work is not worthless. Fame I have gained can help make our society a better place. It is my way of giving back to society and I consider that virtue or merit of my life.”

These are what Nichkhun Horvejkul has told us. Nichkhun has worked in the entertainment industry in Asia for more than a decade. He has also done volunteer work as Friend of UNICEF for six consecutive years.

Growing up in overseas entertainment industry has given him an opportunity to see the big, wide world. It has opened his eyes and widened his perspective while he has accumulated diverse experiences. However, doing volunteer work in his homeland has broadened his viewpoint and made him aware of various hidden social problems in Thailand that have been mostly overlooked.

Success and fame may have turned a shy boy into a beloved superstar. Yet, doing volunteer work has shaped and changed his heart, his mind, and his perspective on life. Nichkhun has redefined success, understood the truth about work and entertainment industry, and determined to take part in solving social problems in Thailand.

Every story he has told us indicates that today Nichkhun has a clear understanding of the true value of life.

Little things that have been overlooked

From the moment JYP Entertainment has chosen Nichkhun to be a member of 2PM, this shy boy’s life path is no longer the same. Becoming a popular singer and an idol in South Korea, he has an opportunity to work in different places every day. Sometimes, he travelled to 3 countries in a single day and rarely had a chance to take a break.

Nichkhun’s fans have collected statistical data about his flights. In 2014, his total flight distance (195,540 kilometres) equals travelling around the world for 4.88 times or almost halfway to the moon.

Nevertheless, in the whole wide world he has travelled, nowhere has been able to unforgettably touch his heart and move him like a particular area in the capital city of Thailand. Various forms of social inequality have been concealed beneath the city’s civilisation.

“Among high-rise buildings and luxurious neighbourhoods in Bangkok, there are places we don’t see or have chosen not to look at. When we drive on the expressways past these places every day, we have rarely acknowledged that there are big communities down there. People in these communities suffer from impoverished living conditions.”

The areas Nichkhun talked about are Klong Toey communities and their numerous social problems.

Participating in various campaigns to advance children’s rights, Nichkhun visited children in these communities and had firsthand experience of what their living conditions were like. Because of this memorable experience, Nichkhun has promised himself to find a way to help improve these children’s lives.

“I still remember those children in Klong Toey communities, the overwhelming smell, the poor environments, the rats, and the cockroaches. I don’t know how can we let those children live like that. It is not their fault that they were born there. I think we have to help them, as fellow Thais and human beings that live in the same world.”

Nichkhun does not live or work in Thailand often. However, whenever he has come back to Thailand, he has dedicated his free time to help children by working with UNICEF and supporting their campaigns.

“I feel very guilty because I often work overseas. I don’t have a chance to visit children in faraway provinces. I will try to find time to work with UNICEF more often. Previously, what I can do best is being a spokesperson who tells people about these problems on social networks and other media channels. I want people to pay attention and help each other. That is what I have to do.”

Shaping his mind and thoughts

Nichkhun admitted that having worked with UNICEF and learned about various social problems affected his thoughts and mind. These experiences have changed the way he looks at the world. He has realised the importance of ‘giving’ more than ever.

“Participation in voluntary or charitable activities has become another motivation for me to keep working in the showbiz and moving forward. I know all the fame I have gained is not futile. I can use fame and my status as a star to give back to society.”

“I always tell my fans they don’t have to buy me any gifts on my birthday. Please make a donation instead. My fans have often made donations and sent me the donation certificates from UNICEF. They have made me very happy and delighted. I have told my fans we have done good deeds together and we will be born to meet each other again in our next lives.” Nichkhun ended the sentence with a sincere smile.

Life is like a wave.

“In the past, I might measure my success by saying “Which rank will I get?” The songs I released had to reach number one on charts. So many billboards at metro or skytrain stations in Thailand showed my face and products I endorsed that Koreans sent me messages that they saw me again. Now I don’t think about these things anymore.”

Nichkhun reflected back on the period when he spent his life focusing on chasing rankings. At that time, he cared about the quantity of his work and believed that it guaranteed his success.

“Today I don’t think about how popular I have to be.” Nichkhun pondered and continued to say, “I am not worried how many followers I have. I don’t think I have to be more popular than anyone. It’s not necessary that 15,000 audience members have to attend my concerts. I performed in front of two or three thousand fans in my latest concerts. My fans and I were happy. I could see everyone’s face in the halls. That is a success for me.”

“Thus, at the moment, success means doing what I love and making people who love me proud and happy. That’s enough.”

Nichkhun summed up his definition of success that has changed.

We asked if it was because he has grown up and has a better understanding of the truth about life.

“I understand that being a star is merely a job, not my heart and soul.” Nichkhun promptly said.

“We can be mentally ill if we think we have to be a star at every single moment,” Nichkhun explained. “When we go up to the highest height, we will come down eventually. Clinging to being a star can make us depressed. For me, I have already known being a star is a job. I will keep doing this job until I want to stop. If my fame fades away, that’s the way it goes. If people still want to hire me, I will keep on working. If not, that’s all right. I will find other activities to do.

“My parents have taught me, “Don’t cling to anything too much.” My father has always told me to live sufficiently. My mother has made me understand that life is like a wave. It goes up and down. New and stronger waves keep coming constantly. The next waves will keep bashing into us. We can’t beat them and we can’t stop them. ”

At 31, Nichkhun has understood the true essence of life and has let go of things he used to cling to. We wanted to know what his ultimate happiness is at present.

“Taking a trip with my family,” Nichkhun replied immediately with sparkling eyes. “At the beginning of this year, I took a road trip with my siblings in America. I am thinking about where should I take my mother to next year.” He turned and smiled at his mother. Nichkhun said taking care of his family gave him incomparable and profound happiness.

“We are building a new house. My sister who is an interior designer has been designing and decorating our house. It should be finished soon.” Happiness radiated from his smile, his eyes, and his face.

From the smallest unit of society to tremendous results

This year, Nichkhun has participated in “Every Child Can Read” Project to raise awareness of the importance of reading.

“I think this is UNICEF’s best project. Reading is really a part of our life.”

Growing up with parents who encouraged him to love reading, Nichkhun read cartoon books about the Buddha’s biography instead of watching television. As a result, Nichkhun has been fascinated by books and can confidently say, for him, reading is like magic. He has astonishing experiences because of reading.

“Paulo Coelho who wrote “The Alchemist” is one of my favourite writers. One day he followed me on Twitter because I frequently tweeted about this book. Later he sent me a signed copy of “The Alchemist.” I can say this is the most magical thing that has happened to me.”

“I sit down to read his book without getting up. When I looked at the clock, I realised several hours passed. He is an exceptional storyteller. I can imagine what he described, the physical traits of his characters, the scents, sounds, and colours of situations. It is like making a movie in our mind. This is the appeal of reading.”

We know that reading is an essential part of a child’s growth. However, in this day and age, digital media is easily accessible. Children are entertained by contents and stories on social networks. Nichkhun believed there are still solutions to these enormous challenges.

“Besides me and other social media influencers, I hope people will help recommend good books for others. Cultivating and nurturing a good reading habit should start from family, the smallest unit of society. Parents should buy books and read them for their kids. These children will remember how enjoyable a book can be. When they are accustomed to reading and want to read a book by themselves, the outcome will be substantial.”

“It is like throwing pebbles into the water, ripples keep spreading out across the surface endlessly,” Nichkhun concluded with a hopeful smile. The comparison he made demonstrates his determination to truly give back to society.

* The title of the interview “Virtue” has the same meaning as Nichkhun’s nickname in Thai (คุณ or Khun).

Source: https://readthecloud.co/nichkhun-horvejkul-unicef-thailand/

Please take out with full credit.

#2pm #nichkhun #190911 Nichkhun’s Interview with The Cloud #Daffodil0624 #interview #friend of unicef #UNICEF #reading

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whatwashernameagain · 6 years

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I’m dying to be with you - Chapter 9

Warnings: Explicit sexual content until the ++++++++++ marking. All of the following after the sexy times, those are really cute, I promise. Contemplation of death, crying, loss of consciousness, blood. (If anyone needs a chapter without the adult parts and the markings aren’t enough, drop me an ask) Also, don’t forget to use condoms in the real world, kids!

Masterpost

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Logan’s hands were gentle as they cupped his love’s face, his kiss slow and unhurried despite his urges. Patton sighed against his lips, his smaller hands pawing at his back like a cat. He felt like he would purr if he could. Patiently, the doctor taught him how to kiss, focusing only on what made his beloved shiver in his arms and arch into his touch. His thumbs brushed over his soft cheeks, his lips following their path, kissing each and every freckle of that pretty face. He had to keep Patton still as a giggle made him squirm. Eager, he chased Logan’s lips, asking to be kissed deeper for the first time in his life. The more experienced man indulged him, coaxing his mouth open and teasing him briefly, innocently.

Patton could not stop smiling, no matter how much it encumbered their kiss. His cheeks were aching in the best way. Butterflies had joined their powdery wings to his heart’s iridescent feathers.

The muscles along Logan’s back moved under his palms, warm and alive and so appealing. His hands wandered further over his body, touching his chest, the rippling muscles of his abdomen, his hipbones, pulling himself closer. Heat flushed through his form as he felt their excited bodies pressed together. He was a little shy about it, like he was not sure if he was allowed. Logan seemed to share his feelings. Pulling away and ducking his head sheepishly, he appeared to battle the urge to apologize for wanting the man who was doing his best to cling to him like an enthusiastic limpet or an affectionate vine. His bashfulness was adorable!

Patton had felt a little insecure about his hopes for the night. Even if everything went as well as he dreamed and Logan miraculously returned his feelings, if he actually wanted him enough to kiss him, to spent the night with him even, he still had no idea how sex actually worked. He knew what to do, of course, but apparently, it was something you had to know how to do. He had cuddled plenty of men, but had never pleasured one. He wanted Logan to like what he did though! And what if Patton did not like it himself? Or if it did not feel as good as the innocent touches he had coaxed out of the attentive doctor? What if it hurt? He was sure he could handle some pain as long as they could be together, but some part of him still naively yearned for a perfect night. He knew the first time was often painful and awkward, that you had to grow comfortable and learn to enjoy yourself and your partner, but he might not have that much time to spare. He just wanted their night to be magical and tender and nice.

His almost absentmindedly wandering hands were captured and held securely.

“What is on your mind, Patton? There is no need to be anxious, I do not expect anything from you. Being allowed to kiss you is more than I ever dared to hope. Your presence with me is a gift I never expected to enjoy and I will cherish every moment, no matter how we choose to occupy our time.” Logan told him gently, his deep voice warm and kind. Once again, the former councilor found himself melting as he looked into those blue eyes. He felt safe.

“I want … um, I want to do more though, if that is okay? I like kissing you and I would like to- to try-” He huffed, suddenly feeling awkward and shy. Saying what he wanted was hard! He ducked his head, hiding his face under the larger man’s chin. It was a nice place to be, enveloped in his scent, being able to press his cheek against the thin material covering his warm, firm chest. His awkwardness lightened as tiny paws curiously shuffled around in his carefully curled locks. Roman would not like hearing about this.

Skilled hands buried in his hair, briefly squabbling with an enraged rat, before soothingly rubbing his scalp. Oh, that felt better than it had any right to! Patton relaxed even more, allowing the other to take more of his weight. He almost heard the gears turning in the smart brain of the man holding him. Knowing he needed time to consider all of the angels, he let him and instead got lost in the pleasurable sensation. Were it not for the needy warmth pooling and growing in his body, he would be content to stay like this for the rest of the night.

He perked up when he felt Logan draw breath to speak, but found him swallowing instead, struggling to speak up. Was he possibly nervous about this as well? The thought gave Patton the much-needed boost of confidence. Taking care of people made him fearless and calm. He drew back, giving the man he cared for so much one of his patented adorable smiles.

A laugh escaped the doctor. He had finally looked through Patton’s innocent facade, making the younger man’s smile brighten even more with amusement. Such a little lynx.

“You- you can have anything you want from me, Patton. I would give you whatever you desire. Please know however that you should not feel obligated or that you are not required to make a decision now. Why don’t we just enjoy the moment and see how much you would like to experience with, um, with me.” He looked a little awed, the darling. More seriously he added, “You must, however, promise me some things.”

A bit of steel had entered the doctor’s tone, stressing the fact that those points were not negotiable. Patton bit his lip as a wave of very nice feelings flooded him at the tone. He had always liked when Logan had sounded a little strict. It was a guilty pleasure of his and one of the reasons he was intentionally obstinate sometimes. The doctor’s eyes were drawn to the movement briefly, making Patton feel desirable and naughty.

Apparently shaking himself, he gently grasped the rat and lowered it to the ground where it apparently roamed free before focusing on Patton attentively.

“I do not want you to overexert yourself. If you are feeling faint or nauseous or in any way in pain, you must inform me immediately. I trust you are aware of the risks of being here and exerting yourself physically. It would be wiser to return you to the hospital-” A sigh escaped the now clearly worried man as he saw Patton shake his head determinedly. No can do, he was not wasting more time there.

“Alright. But you must promise to alert me to any and all uncomfortable or unusual sensations, no matter what we may be doing. That also includes any unpleasant sensations that might be caused by our … activities.” He flushed a little, clearly having trouble holding his gaze as he implied their possible actions. It made loving affection build in Patton’s little heart. He nodded obediently.

“Additionally I want you to tell me to stop if you should ever feel uncomfortable, overwhelmed or unwilling to do or continue anything at all, alright? Your enjoyment is of the highest priority, do you understand?”

Patton didn’t know why it was happening in precisely this moment, but he suddenly felt so touched, so loved that he had to blink back tears. He nodded, allowing the doctor to brush the moisture away. His brow was furrowed with anxiety. The poor thing was clearly alarmed and confused about the reason for his crying.

“It’s fine, I’m just so happy.” He promised honestly, taking the hand that had explored him during examinations so often, and finally kissing it like he had wanted to for so long.

They came together again as if something about the other was drawing them in. Patton nibbled at Logan’s lip, feeling playful. All of his nervousness had melted from him at his lover’s words. It would be alright, his favorite doctor would take good care of him. Despite the utter gentleness he was being touched with, he was starting to become a little impatient. His nerve-endings felt alive, making him shiver and shake with every touch. It was like his senses had suddenly come into focus. Everything felt so intense. He tugged on raven locks, pulled at the edge of a cotton shirt, complaining silently.

Logan laughed against eager lips as he felt the demanding hands urging him on. It seemed Patton had found his confidence and was telling him to get on with it. Awash with happiness that did not allow for fear or caution, he grabbed the slighter man’s thighs and lifted him up. He deserved soft sheets under his back.

Patton yelped as he suddenly lost touch with the floor, before the sound turned into a squeal. He had always loved being carried around by Roman, but this position had the added benefit of allowing him to wrap his thighs around trim hips and grind against the man holding him up sensually. He was rewarded with a low growl he could feel down to his bones. The light scrape of teeth on his neck made him gasp.

Another yelp filled the room as he was suddenly disposed of, landing on his back on a wide bed and snowy-white covers. As the looked up at the attractive man crawling over him, all long lines and well defines muscle, he reverently thanked his body for saving him from any dizziness or weakness on this night. There was nothing he could not do tonight.

Surging up eagerly, he grabbed two fist-fulls of t-shirt and tugged his partner down, making him land with an ‘oof’ that had both snickering. Logan rolled off of him so not to crush him under his weight and leaned in to kiss him again, lovingly and slowly. Patton’s fingers curled in the fabric he was clutching as his lover sucked on his bottom lip. So many lovely, new sensations! There was one he was especially eager for though. Breaking the kiss, he tugged Logan’s t-shirt over his head without warning, tangling his amused lover in the fabric helplessly.

“Get this off!” He demanded through a chuckle. “I can’t bare to have you dressed!”

Logan groaned in fond exasperation, sitting up to actually fold the shirt and put it aside with his and then Patton’s glasses. Patton really should not be surprised. He enjoyed the adorable tidiness though. It reflected the carefully furnished and decorated room around him well. The walls were painted cream, the deep blue curtains half drawn over floor length, old-fashioned windows. The wooden furniture was covered in tidy stacks of books, healthy plants and models of spaceships from popular movies. Patton cheered in delight as he recognized the Serenity from ‘Firefly’ as well as the USS Enterprise. How adorable! He would have never thought Logan would collect toys, this was the cutest thing ever! He was half off the bed to investigate gleefully when he was caught by a strong arm around his waist. His lover had flushed bright red once again.

“There is no need to focus on my collectibles, I assure you, they are not all that interesting!” He hastened to convince Patton. The younger man was all the more interested now, but not averse to being distracted at all either. Seeing Logan without a shirt was a treat. He was slender, built like a runner and devastatingly gorgeous. Patton still yearned to feed him though.

Spurred on by all of that delectable skin, he did not want to fall behind. Feeling pretty and wanting to enjoy the feeling, he turned, presenting his back to Logan to encourage him to undress him. He heard the man’s breathing speed up and wanted out of his clothes even more. Though not overly confident in his body, he was starting to believe his lover would enjoy it.

Gentle fingertips brushed up his spine, spreading goosebumps over the vulnerable skin, before he felt a tug on the strings of the bow holding his shirt close to his body. Anticipation made him shake as he raised his arms and felt the protective layer stripped from him.

Logan coaxed him down on his stomach, kissing and exploring every inch of exposed skin, his breath warm and intimate on his back. Patton clutched tighter at the covers, squirming with rising need. He was surprised to find his breath coming out in panting gasps as large hands ran down from his shoulders over his hips to the curve of his butt.

“Is this alright?” Logan asked. His voice was caring, concerned. His little lover arched up impatiently, wanting more. His body was tingling all over. It was so intense, he had not known it could feel like this.

“Yes!” He cried, growing impatient as the doctor was waiting for verbal consent. He felt a huff of hot air right over the dip of his lower back, a laugh. His answering smile was hidden in the pillow he was clutching.

Upon the request of his eagerly wiggling hips, his trousers were eased over his body, leaving him almost naked. Logan settled over his hips and took his time running his hands all over the body under him until Patton was bucking and keening under him, tempting him terribly. The young man was the most beautiful creature he had ever had beneath him and he wanted him badly. He wished he could draw this out for hours, hold him down and tease him until he begged and pleaded, but he worried about overexerting his little love. Carefully, he turned him around, pushing his shoulder blades into the mattress and kissing him deeply. His fingers teased sensitive nipples, circling and pinching them slightly. Patton arched under him, pushing himself close. He was hard to resist, made passion rise up in him hotly. He was never quiet, making small, almost innocent noises all the time. It made Logan itch to make him louder, make him cry and scream and scrabble at his back as he pleasured him.

Instead, he ignored his painfully encased need and touched Patton’s length through his underwear for the first time. His lover cried out under him, twitching and clutching his shoulders hard. He was so responsive.

Taking his time, Logan rubbed and palmed him until Patton was gasping into the kiss, let him grow frantic. The cupped a hand over his throat, letting him feel his hold and covertly pressing his fingertips to his pulse point, just to be certain. His heart beat steadily and powerfully. It seemed to funnel strength right into him, encouraging him. He fondled Patton harder, recognizing how much he enjoyed the firmer grip on his intimate area. Slender fingers dug into his shoulders in response. His hips were stuttering, bucking uncontrollably.

Suddenly, Patton surprised him by pushing at him even as his hips begged for contact. Logan required a second to understand the conflicting signals, before yanking his hands back, worriedly hovering over Patton. He looked completely wrecked, flushed, sweaty and disheveled. He was exquisite.

“Did I hurt you?” Logan rasped worriedly. His voice was rougher than expected. Patton shook his head, trying to control his need.

“No, I- I don’t want it to be over yet! I want to come with you, close to you. I want- I want you to take me.” Pleadingly, he looked up at Logan through his lashes, so pretty. “Please.”

The older man’s brain stumbled over the request briefly, short-circuiting as it conjured the image. Just two hours ago he had tried hard to convince himself that he needed to stay away from Patton, that he could not have him, and now he was squirming under him, begging to be taken. He ran a hand over his face, trying to pull himself together, trying not to pounce and grab and drive Patton’s hips into the mattress with his thrusts. Not yet.

“Are you certain? There are many ways I can please you. I would be happy to.” He promised. A yelp escaped him as he was suddenly grabbed as if he were attacked by an enthusiastic octopus, arms and legs wrapping around him, a smile on the lips kissing him.

“You are so sweet to me! Of course, I’m sure! I want to know what it feels like to be as close as possible.” He exclaimed, pecking his skillful lover’s cheek. Those pants needed to go though, he wanted to see everything. Eagerly, he pulled on the fabric, briefly confusing the other with his suddenly wandering hands. He was indulged though.

Patton pulled his underwear off as well, all traces of shyness gone in the overwhelming comfort he was enveloped in. He would have never thought he would feel so at home, naked in a man’s arms. The intimacy was incredible, so loving and arousing. He felt cherished and driven half crazy at the same time. And so impatient!

Logan, bless him, seemed to feel his urgency and kissed him and steadied him at the same time. He lifted his hips gently, sliding a pillow under them to make him more comfortable, before he reached over to his bedside table and coaxed Patton’s thighs apart wide with his other hand. Oh, this position made him flush a little after all, it was so open and exposed. The sensation added to his excitement though. Using a leg to tug around his lover, he urged him on. Stretching his body deliciously helped motivate him, he learned. The way Logan hurried to fulfill his wishes made him feel confident and good about himself. Was the first time not supposed to be uncomfortable? This was far from it, he was in the arms of the right man after all.

He twitched as slick fingers touched his opening, his most intimate place. Logan pressed the pads of his fingers against him slightly, massaging and rubbing, letting him feel him there, and looked at Patton for confirmation once more. His blue eyes were so loving. They found only eagerness and need. He pushed the first finger in.

The younger man gasped upon being penetrated. The sensation was intense, intimate. He was very tight, and very sensitive. He felt claimed and connected as he was fingered slowly. Laying back and breathing through the arousing, stretching sensation, he allowed his lover to push into him at his leisure, let him take over and push deeper, rotate his fingers and make him take more. Patton’s hips were rolling lazily, almost drunkenly. He arched and whimpered and squeaked at being thrust into harder. That felt good! Logan appeared to enjoy fingering him too. He experimented with different pressures and speeds, more fingers, massaging him tenderly or pushing in firmly. It was hypnotic to see Patton like this, reduced to reacting to the feelings he showered him with, trusting him to pleasure him.

Finally, through the haze of tingling, all-consuming lust, Patton felt his lover’s fingers withdraw. He had just enough mental capacity left to prevent the question he knew his considerate lover was about to ask. “Yes, c’mere!” He muttered, pulling Logan in and kissing him. He poured all of his love and gratefulness into the kiss. This was the most perfect moment of his life.

Pressure at his opening made him breathe in sharply. Logan kissed him deeper, intertwining their hands and pressing them into the mattress on either side of his head, immobilizing him as much as he was reassuring him, and that was a position Patton was enjoying very much indeed. Heat and lust made him moan into the kiss. The pressure intensified, turning to slight pain as he was breached. Somehow, in his state of utter bliss, the ache of being opened wide around Logan’s cock sent a jolt of pleasure through him. He arched his hips slightly as he was being filled more and more, more than he had thought he could take. A keen escaped him at the depth, his thighs quivering, his brow furrowed from the stretch and the lust that made his whole body weak.

Logan stilled, cupping Patton’s face and looking at him as if he were the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. The younger man was gratified to see how deeply he was affected. His muscles trembled with the effort of holding himself back. They wrapped their arms around each other, trying to be as close as possible, trying to hold onto the moment. They did not need to speak to know what the other was feeling.

Logan rolled his hips sensually, leisurely fucking into his lover and making him fall apart slowly underneath him. The pressure, the thrusts, they made Patton keen and writhe in little time, made him try to get closer, get more. He lost control of the noises that escaped him quickly. The alien sensation of being opened soon added to his unraveling. Logan looked at him the whole time, trying to commit the sight of him shaking and whimpering his name to memory so he could take it with him, carry it safely in his heart till the end of his days.

Patton came with a cry, quivering through an intense orgasm that left him utterly weak. Logan fucked him through it, drawing the feeling out, before he came in the younger man with a stifled roar. It was a long time before either of them moved from their intertwined position.

He was very gentle with Patton afterwards, cleaning him up and taking his pulse, making him drink water and tucking him into his arms in a nest of pillows. The younger man smiled sleepily at the slightly awkward care be was blessed with. His muscles felt like jelly, but he felt good. In fact, he could not remember feeling happier. The sun dipped behind the horizon as they kissed.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Warmth enveloped Patton as he lay awake, bathed in starlight streaming through the partially open curtain. Logan’s arm was securely wrapped around him, holding his tenderly against his body he had curled around the younger man’s back, even in sleep. He was pliant next to his former patient, finally, blissfully relaxed.

Burying his face in the pillow, Patton tried to breathe evenly, tried not to love too much, tried desperately to muffle his crying. The night had been utterly perfect, more so than even his dreamy, optimistic mind could have come up with. Having experienced the reality of being in Logan’s arms made the certainty he had to face even more agonizing. The certainty that he was running out of time. His heart stuttered in his chest, making fear shoot through his slight body like ice. He held his breath to suppress a sob, held it until his lungs burned.

He showed everyone nothing but happiness, tried to make them think he was no regrets, he believed everything would be alright, that he was not afraid, but he was! He was so afraid his chest cramped and his breath turned to painful gasps. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to stop the tears from falling to his swollen face would not give him away in the morning. He had become very good at hiding his terror. There was no need to share his suffering with those who did not deserve it, no matter how much he yearned, every night, to wake somebody and crawl into their arms, to beg them to chase away the demons and tell him everything would be alright. At night, when nobody was watching, his strength gave out and he succumbed to his regrets and fears and his desperate wish for more time. He did not want to die. He was not ready! He had so much left to do, so many things he had missed, so many regrets.

Yes, he had dared to confront Logan about his feelings, had taken charge and convinced him not to waste the little time they had felt, so they could both live life to the fullest, and it had been beautiful. Being with Logan had been the greatest gift anyone had ever given him. He had made him feel whole. But now, bitter, painful doubts crept into his mind. He moved silently, clasped a hand over his mouth to muffle a sob that escaped despite his caution, despite the practice he had at keeping his emotions silent and his smile fixed immovably on his face. Part of him wanted Logan to wake up and hold him, kiss him, reassure him that he would not have to die, he did not have to be so afraid, that he would get to be with him, built a family with Virgil and Roman and take up his beloved job again, adopt a cat and a puppy and a child and grow old together, but he must not. Logan could never see his misery. The least he could do was make him think he had died happy, that he had done all he could, so he could move on. There was no future with Patton, despite how badly he wanted to give this kind, loving man a life full of love and tenderness. Instead, he had selfishly robbed him of his last defense – the distance and the walls he had built between himself and Patton, and Patton’s impending death. During the day, when it was easier to imagine things would be alright, to delude himself while people were with him, he had believed he was doing something good, he was giving him love. Now, in the dark of night, with Logan slumbering behind him, loving and vulnerable, he realized the truth. He had dragged him down with him. Involved him in his death and might destroy him forever. How could he not have seen it?! Logan was gentle and breakable, he would not take the memory of their love and gain strength from it, he would focus on his loss and it would crush him.

Unable to prevent his heaving sob, Patton smothered himself in the clean-smelling pillow, his face a grimace of agony. He was afraid.

Logan slept on, unaware.

***

The next day brought a new sunrise and a slow smile from the man he loved, the man that loved him, and the strength to smile through the pain once again. Logan pulled him close, holding him with such love and reverence, that some of the bitter fear knotting his chest into painful cramps eased, chased away by tenderness. Patton breathed in the smell of the man who had made love to him for the first time, losing himself in him. Incredibly, the longer he focused on him, the more he forgot the future. Logan filled every crevice of his mind, his chest, his heart. It soared.

They spent the most beautiful weekend together. Logan washed his hair with loving hands, looked at him with awe, dressed him in his clothes, kissed him like he was the most delicate thing he had ever touched. He fulfilled all of Patton’s wishes. They spent the day in the park with Roman and Virgil, ate cotton candy and watched their friends bicker and hold hands by turns. Patton and his creative friend spent the evening trying to create little scrubs for the adorable rat (whose origin Roman was kept firmly in the dark about) while their boyfriends cooked and laughed about their antics, and while Virgil and Roman fell asleep on the couch, Logan took Patton in his arms and caressed and kissed him until he melted in his embrace. The day had been complete and utter perfection. It had felt like a gift. And it had not been Logan’s last. This night, Patton sank into his arms, tired and satisfied, and slept till the sun brightened the room once again.

The next day brought a grumpy Roman, who complained about the kink in his neck and his lack of a proper shower, did they not know how dirty the human body was?! Until Virgil wandered out of said shower clad in only a thin robe which was slipping off one slender shoulder, smirking at him.

After Roman used half of Logan’s antibacterial soap, they went shopping for baking supplies so Patton could enjoy Logan’s large, well-equipped kitchen and feed his lovely family. He was filled with happiness as he stirred the batter for his favorite red velvet cake to create cute, pink frosted cupcakes he could decorate for each of them. Roman was singing in the living-room, making Virgil snort at him. Logan was cleaning up after them, trying to look intimidating but failing by a mile.

Having two more people in his space caused a lot more mess and unrest than he had expected. Roman had somehow managed to bring enough beauty products in his hand-bag to clutter his whole bathroom, and that was apparently only his emergency supply. Virgil was constantly trying to suppress a smile though. He looked more relaxed than he had ever seen him before. Knowing he was taken care of made Logan feel light. His whole flat was filled with life and cheer and he it was far better than he had ever dreamed.

A crash cut through the silence like a knife. Patton.

Ice flooded Logan’s veins.

He was sprawled on the floor, limp, lifeless. Glass shards littered the floor, cutting into his soft hands where he had tried to break his fall before darkness pulled him under. The scarlet stains of his blood mixed with the batter he had been mixing for them. They had run out of time.

******************************************************

Next Chapter

#Logicality #adorable sexy-times #tooth rotting fluff #Logan you sap

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saralynnx · 6 years

Text

Sara Speaks - Tips on Running Your Simblr

Okay, so, as some of you may know, this is my second round at simblr. My first one was a disorganized mess, which is why I decided to start over. Overall, I have been a part of the simblr community for almost two years, and I have learned a lot in that time. I thought maybe it would be a good idea to jot down all the things I have learned/am doing differently this time around, mainly for personal reflection but also to potentially help anyone else out there just starting out. One of my dear friends, Katie, has recently started her own simblr, so this also acts as a welcome/shout out to her as well. You can find her at @fragile-sims0106. Without further ado, let’s get started!

1. URL -- Make your URL something sims-related, or include ‘sim’, ‘sims’, ‘simming’, ‘simmer’, etc in it. That way, other simblrs scrolling through tumblr looking for new simblrs to follow can easily see at a glance what you’re all about. This may seem like an obvious tip, but believe it or not, my first URL was not sims-related. I realize that changing URLs is simple and easy--but it can lead to confusion for your followers. It’s better to choose your URL carefully and stick with it.

2. Posts -- Keep your content original and sims-related. It’s okay to throw up a personal post every once and a while, or to occasionally reblog that super cool new cc that you found, but your posts should be 90-95 percent original sims content. Whether it be your story, your gameplay, your OWN cc that you create, edits, lookbooks, sim modeling, etc--people follow you to see what unique things you have to offer to the simblr community. If you find yourself wanting to reblog a lot of cc, it might be best to create a side blog dedicated to your personal cc finds.

3. The Game -- This is controversial and can really go either way, but in my personal opinion, you should stick to one version of the game on your simblr. Whether it be Sims 2, Sims 3, or Sims 4, pick your favorite version and stick with posting only gameplay/content with that, and if you’re itching to play the other versions, do so on your own time OR create a side blog/separate simblr per version. It makes your blog more cohesive and less confusing. Also, a lot of simmers (such as my self), only like to see one version on their dash. It might turn some people off if you are constantly rotating between games. If you do decide to post more than one version on your simblr, try to be diligent about your tagging and include navigation that makes it easy for simmers to access content from the version of their choice.

4. Gameplay -- Try to stick to no more than two or three saves. And, work hard to see them through. Constantly stopping and starting projects, and/or having many saves going on your blog at once, can confuse and/or deter followers. Again, if you are posting about multiple projects/saves, clearly tag your posts and keep things organized on your main page with easy to access navigation.

5. Posting Schedule -- Stay consistent with your posts. Obviously your personal life comes first and if you need to take a break and step back from your simblr for a little while, that’s understandable. But, being haphazard and inconsistent with your posting schedule can deter followers. It’s a good idea to post once a week at the minimum. If life keeps you busy on a regular basis, it might be best to set up a queue for your blog to keep it active for your followers. However, there can be a caveat with queues, which I will talk about next.

6. Your Queue -- Having a queue is a valuable resource for many simblrs. However, I personally found that having a queue proved more frustrating and overwhelming than it was worth. What happened to me in the past is that my queue would end up weeks -- sometimes even months -- ahead of my gameplay, which in turn made me less motivated to play. OMG, my sim Suzie just aged to a young adult -- I can’t wait for everyone to see what she looks like, her traits, etc! But oh wait -- my queue is so far behind that she is actually still a toddler on my blog. Again, this is all based on your personal habits and needs, but I found it to be much more manageable to post as I play. I know that I can fit in play time at least once a week, so my blog will still be kept active but up to date with my gameplay at the same time, which is a lot less stressful for me.

7. Editing -- It’s good to figure out and stick with a particular editing style for your screenshots that you post. Of course, you don’t have to edit your screenshots, although many people do. If you are going to edit them, do it in your favor. What do I mean by that? Well, instead of using someone else’s Photoshop action or copying a particular style used on another simblr, create your own unique action/editing style for yourself to set your simblr apart from everyone else’s. It will gather more interest to your blog and gain you more followers. Plus, now that I have my own personal action that I created and use, I am much more proud of my work and am that much more excited to play and showcase my screenshots.

8. Reach Out -- Part of what makes having a simblr fun is meeting new people and getting a good follower base going. The best way to do this is to put yourself out there. Follow as many other simblrs as you can. Keep active on your dash and like as many posts as you can. If something really strikes you, reach out to that simmer and leave a comment. Or send that person an ask, preferably off anon. Doing this sort of thing on a regular basis will get your url out there and will attract more followers. Plus, every simmer loves comments and compliments on their work. It makes us smile and helps keep us motivated to post and play. But, be sincere. Don’t spam comment just for the sake of attention. Don’t ask for shout-outs or followers. That will just backfire and turn others off.

9. Have Fun -- Last and most important is to just be yourself and have fun. Ultimately, your simblr is yours to do with as you choose and something you do for yourself and not for everyone else. There is no right or wrong when it comes to running your simblr, and the above are all just tips that have worked for me, but they may not be what’s best for you. Don’t stress yourself out. Simblr is ultimately all about having fun. If you are constantly stressing over your follower count, or playing/posting a save that you have no interest in anymore, it may be best to just take a break and take a step back and re-evaluate your blog and what you are doing. Changing things up is not a bad thing if it helps you get back in the groove again and back to having fun. Don’t worry about disappointing your followers. Again, you’re doing this for your own personal enjoyment, and if you’re not enjoying yourself, it will probably show, and, quite frankly, what’s the point of doing it then?

Those are all the major tips that I have to share. To summarize, what’s most important is to stay organized, be consistent, be yourself/unique, and HAVE FUN. This list is in no way intended to be the end-all, be-all of running a simblr, and what works for you may be completely different from what I have written here, and that’s okay. However, if I do manage to help someone who is struggling, then all the better and I am happy I could give you some inspiration. Take care everyone, and happy simming! :)

#text #misc #tips #guide #simblr

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