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noxiatoxia · 2 years

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had another idea,, imagine super young hikaru and kaoru, maybe like 6/7. their maids are practically raising them, parents are never around. and while the maids do take good Care of them, they're not really that empathetic or gentle with them because,, they're not supposed to be parents

i think that due to the lack of parent like attention the twins act out to get it, basically harassing and tormenting the poor maids. so if the maids were kind to the twins at the beginning, they definitely keep their distance now because the little shits are just mean. really sad stuff because its a vicious cycle at that point, they act out for attention and in return get even less each time

anyway the point is that the maids try to stay as distanced from the twins as possible. and the twins don't really like or trust them either because they're so distant with them

so maybe one of them, could be either but Kaoru this time, wakes up not feeling well. its not too bad yet so when the maids check on them in the morning, they don't see anything's wrong with them

but hikaru knows and is really worried and scared. kaoru starts getting a fever, its probably just a flu or something, but that still scares little hikaru so badly because he doesn't know how to function with kaoru in a state like this.

typically, when they get sick it happens at the same time. and when they do get sick, the maids will take them to a different room, put them in separate beds so they won't pass it back to each other, have private doctors monitoring them a lot, refuse to let them leave their beds/go play/talk alone. basically their worst nightmare. (dont ask me why they're so overkill. idk. dealing with sick kids sucks i dont blame them+if something really bad happens to the twins they're at risk of getting sued for everything they have)

so hikaru and kaoru realize that if they tell the maids kaoru is sick, they'll split them up. kaoru will be alone in that room being monitored, since its only him who's sick, and they'll kick hikaru out so he'll be all by himself all day (or until they're sure kaoru's better, and they tend to be really cautious so he'd probably have to sleep alone as well) and neither of them want that.

cue tiny hikaru sneaking around spy style trying to get things for kaoru without anyone noticing because itd be a dead giveaway something is wrong if he was seen alone. trying to steal soup from the kitchen and extra blankets from the cabinets to bring back to his brother. as well as just trying his damndest to make kaoru feel better, all while being worried out of his mind about him

a lot of cute stuff could come from this i think

ANON THIS IS GIVING ME. .RABIES. ANON!!!!!!!!!!

I LITERALLY POG WHENEVER U SEND ME SHIT ITS BEEN THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY WEEK FRFR.... <- SOBBING AND WAILING

But!!! I love this!!!! So so so much!!!! Ok. I will be Normal about this.

Firstly, your idea is EXACTLY my headcanon and tbh I read it in a fic before but I can't remember which one it's been so long... but I 100% agree. I think as little kids, Hikaru and Kaoru would act out a lot and do all those nasty and mean things for attention. Since mom and dad never gave it to them, they tried to get it other ways and the only way they knew how to get people to pay attention to them was to be devious little bastards and cause trouble. Bad attention is better than no attention. And it's really sad too, cuz this just pushed people away from them in the long run. But theyre little kids, of course they didn't think that far ahead. And they probably aren't very conscious on why they do what they do either. They just know it's funny and that it makes people look at them, and so they do it. If they're lucky, they'll do something really bad that makes Mama Hitachiin come home and scold them so they can see their mom again

...that sounds pretty sad saying it aloud, huh

and the second scenario. i fucking adore. I already am a big fan of tropes of characters getting sick bc of the Vulnerability (it can also just be goofy and comedic sometimes) but with the little kid Hitachiins.... oh boy oh boy.

Because, Hikaru isn't nearly old enough to be smart about this. It isn't like now where, if he was tasked with having to take care of Kaoru, he could do a basic good job. Make sure he drinks water, check his temperature; he'd know when a high fever was too high, he'd know who to call if it got bad. But as a kid? He knows none of this. And who can blame him? He's just a kid; it isn't his job to look after his brother like a doctor would. He still takes on the responsibility anyways, because it's Hikaru + he doesn't want anybody impeding. In the situation you laid out, he sure as hell doesn't want to be separated from Kaoru or let Kaoru suffer alone.

So, he just... decides to take care of Kaoru himself! Can't be too hard, right?

Tbh, it'd probably go very badly. He doesn't know what kaoru should eat- soup? He's seen it on cartoons. He'd sneak him some soup. It doesn't even occur to him at any point to check his temperature to make sure it isnt getting critically high or make him drink water or cool his body temp down, bc what 7yr is gonna know that...

And sadly, since they've pushed away so many of the regular maids, none of them really notice that they're more quiet than usual, or that they see only 1 at a time.

And when it comes to younger kids, esp if they have a high fever, it can get really bad really fast (tbh i speak from experience form an Incident i suffered as a child). Kaoru is really sluggish and really not feeling well, and after the third day mark, he's not getting much better. Probably just getting worse. Hikaru is afraid out of his mind.

Being just a kid (and you know how kids are. not very bright. would rather do ANYTHING else other than the right option if theyre afraid of it) he probably tries doing research on whatever Google was like at this time period or looking thru the books in their library at home. He's still young, so he has trouble reading much of the complicated words and things he doesn't understand.

I think dehydration would definitely be the biggest issue, esp if Kaoru has an upset stomach and is getting sick. Combined with the sweating from the fever - yeah, hopefully he's drinking water. And I'm sure Hikaru brings him some. But more realistically, he's probably giving him juices and other things which aren't bad, but not as useful as just...water. And he probably isn't drinking enough, anyways.

idk how it would end........ realistically? I think some maid comes in to clean their room or something and realizes, oh shit, this kid is REALLY sick wtf how long have you been like this. And then they're calling like ER and shit.

Oh, and a final thought: dunno how realistic it would be, but I'm a sucker for the trope of when somebody is hurt/sick/other ailment and Nobody Believes Them which I think could be very likely here. Maybe Hikaru and Kaoru pulled a prank like this in the past. Maybe the maid he asked that day was just pissed off and wanted to go home. Either way when Hikaru breaks and does try to get help he's shooed off and told to stop messing around. Which if he didn't trust these people before, he certainly doesn't now.

#hikakao #IM NORMAL! <LYING #ohshc #;noxiatalks2ya

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thedaythealienscame · 2 years

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on my phone so this might contain errors but i have a lot of thoughts re: an "adam becomes an apprentice" au. not bad ones I just think the concept is honestly incredibly interesting + there's small things from the movies that support this line of thinking. even more interesting when you add in his relationship with amanda

tl;dr - it makes me SAD for all of them it's such a shitty situation for anyone to be in

by design, you feel bad for him. when you meet him he really has done nothing wrong other than be a cheaper pi because he has no license. his game is unwinnable from the beginning. so the idea that he was somehow saved (which i think would be more in-line with jigsaw's attitude now that we've had a retcon via the jigsaw movie (and logan)) is great! and then twists into something very sad afterwards

because if lawrence was saved by john, adam couldn't have been saved by anyone else and it puts him in a really vulnerable position since (a) he's being looked after by either hoffman or amanda, a woman He Has Met Before, in what is obviously not a hospital, and since that has now happened... (b) he's seen their faces AND john's face. there's no way that they can let him leave until he becomes complicit in their crimes somehow. which isn't even a sure bet tbh, because he might just tell someone anyway

there's two different routes that could be had here:

the best course of action is honestly to give him a safehouse with someone after he gets out of a real hospital and get him to do things away from where they're building traps. most obvious thing to do For jigsaw is the pictures/stalking for before. otherwise, since he isn't a missing person, let him do normal people things

the other is to keep him locked up in a basement somewhere but I'm not. a fan

the biggest OTHER problem is his relationships with everyone else. particularly john and amanda

john is for obvious reasons, but like. he knew amanda before, albeit barely. he might be able to brush off her being there with some ideas that she wasn't involved at all in his game nut like. she was. and she harbours a lot of guilt over the fact that he almost died so like.. the truth will have to come out eventually, right? and i cant imagine he would take it well, and she seems to care a lot about what other people think of her of the way she acts around john and hoffman is any indication, so she wouldnt be happy about that.

they're also probably, like, the most compatible friendship-wise, and you cant make a lot of friends when you're in a situation like that. idk if they would ever make up, I'm hoping they would, but it's not a guarantee

i dont think it would be far fetched to assume that he'd live with another apprentice while he was getting back on his feet (if he ever does at all), or that they would all live in one house together--not counting the time amanda spends with john in abandoned factories just because that's what's convenient and cheapest for everyone. he probably wouldn't Like It but you know. also the idea of lawrence getting partial custody of diana and being able to see her on weekends/every other week is funny if he had to introduce some new roommates that are just like. two jaded people in their mid/late 20s

also, depending on where you want this story to go, saw iii may have to be completely cut out of the timeline. if you want saw iii i do t think that there's any way adam would sti k around considering john and amanda have died and he's filled his purpose. idk if he would flee or just distance himself from hoffman, it really depends

if you dont want that to happen the i thi k itd be good for everyone if john just died like. alone. and either way they would all probably have to leave town or lie low for a long time

anyway. that's all my thoughts sorry i've spent a good hour and a half just thinking about this and typing it all out i love them all a lot

#saw

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solomons-poison · 11 months

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my mc is EVIL. the moment he got pulled into the devildom its was immediate plots on how to one up this oddly handsome kidnapper. admitted he understood he wasnt actually a kidnapper by week 2 but still plays that card when putting a bucket of water on top of lucis cracked door. i think lulus conflicted on him... on one hand luci likes the rebels (mamon...) but on the other hand he Really dosent love him poking him when bored.

also the moment he got assigned to mams to be babysat you better BELIEVE he was trying to sneak off. wouldnt be surprised if my mc wasnt allowed to walk around without one of those toddler leash backpacks. Probably has bitten mams more than once and told mams that he has rabies... probably friends regardless tho mams just as chaotic.

i dont think him and levi really even meet. realistically levis holed up and my MCs not the type to start convos with Kidnappers people who dont start convos, and by time he figures he can chill its wayyy too awkward to try and be buddy buddy. missed connection via social awkwardness. Probably at least nod at eachother in the hallways though.

satan.. ok hes my fave so i want to say dating and bffs forever. being unbias is hard so i wont be <3 both are aloof and outside of causing problems, quiet. so between the terrorizing of luci and being able to sit in the same room four hours doing their own things without speaking and calling it bonding, they get along pretty well. Also my MC was raised with cats so he unintentionally does the slow blinky and headbutts . you know itd kill him. fostering kittens together saying its good looking for the exchange program but "secretly" just wanting to coo over kittens

azzy... it can go one of two ways. theyre either IN LOVE with eachother or REALLY want eachother dead. both are flamboyant. both can and will rock heels. both probably will kill a man in the name of love. makeup nails ect... they all share same interests even if only in passing, any hobby they share. now we know azzy loves himself, but it could wayyy easily be seen as trying to steal eachothers things and getting mad jealous over it. literal catfight. hard to say.

beel.. distant but still closer than levi. my MC isnt really a food person, nor a working out person. HOWEVER he does appreciate someone he can sit quietly next to. Also my mc would love to buy him snacks. always fun to pick up snacks when you rember someone likes that snack. might go on a jog with him once or twice and then 10 mins in act like hes dying just to be carried by the hunk tho.

belphie. ok . look assuming theres a proper redemption for the murder thing. like not just jumping from i hate you to i love you. theyd probably get along... both youngest... both EVIL... and again mc loves a good quiet time with someone. might get annoyed at all his sleeping,,, my mc isnt that energetic no, but still wants to like. do things. theres only so many times you can handle nap dates. also the "im the youngest baby me" rivalry would be something to behold.

i could do dateables too but we will be here All day.

anyways this is all to say in NB he's immediately abandoning the babysitting job to go do whatever he wants. once again luci has to bring out the toddler leash. also hes just an actual demon j with the soul of an angel. fills the role of mechivious non violent demon perfectly hence why no one ever stopped to ask if this dude that fell out of a hole in the middle of a tour is really a demon.

Your MC is a creature of chaos and I highly respect that LOL

Imagining him possibly biting Mammon is so funny, being absolutely feral, and the toddler leash, I love it so much

I think my favorite thing in the original Obey Me was finding out that (if it's true, I never ended up redoing my choices to see a difference), you would gain more intimacy points with Lucifer for choosing rebellious responses, versus obedient or neutral responses?? That was so funny to me. So you mentioning that Luci is conflicted on how to feel about your MC totally tracks. Like he doesn't really want some goody two shoes, but also he has his hands full with his brothers already, does there have to be another troublesome person to deal with?

My MC was also raised with cats and is a cat person, so I totally get the bonding with Satan very well. I love the idea of terrorizing Lucifer together with Satan haha

I love all of these and your reasonings, thank you for sharing ❤️

#˗ˏˋ꒰ minx replies ꒱

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fightxxmexxshiggy · 3 years

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🥟📎 awww you're too sweet!!!!! I'm glad you like my ideas so much even though they just ramble on and on.

But, as long as you're enjoying, I'll add on cause I'm slightly overflowing with them at the moment (adhd brains. 0 or 100. Very very little I between.)

So imagine how helpless Kiri Bakugo would feel while their partner is pregnant and then when they go into labor. Like, over all there isn't that much they can do. Yes throught everything they can help her stay comfy and what not but got how they wish they could just take on some of the bad stuff.

And lord help them if they start googling different labor complications. Like no matter how unlikely, the stats say they are the guys are gonna high key Low key be terrified. They learned not to tell you after you turned into a sobbing mess when they brought up one and you made them have the of it's between me or the baby convo (how that went is up to you). Like they may be terrified but they don't wanna relive that night.

Then I see two hilarious labor scenarios. granted there are infinite. But I'll pluck out these two.

A) You go into labor relatively normally. Get to the hospital get settled, or at least as settled as you can when you're gonna have a person come out of you. The guys are on edge. Like the hospital had to send in their strictest, toughest old guard nurse to put the fear of god into them so they'd stop acting like chickens with their heads cut off. I personally headcanon it as a labor with no epidural for personal reasons but like reader insert man. Regardless of pain meds or not, Kiri is gonna say you're super manly™️. He'll even harden his hand so you don't have to worry about breaking (not that you would frankly care at this point) but it's handy 😏. And then you get to pushing a both pro heros who have seen plenty of blood and gore nearly faint. Still can't decide who/how they decide which oen gets to cut the cord but I feel like it's the one time Bakugo knows better than to make it a competition, cause he and Kiri just wanna keep watching you smile down at the (kinda gross covered in goo) beautiful, perfect infant on your chest. Time passes, the three of you are left alone to bond. Eventually you begin to nod and off and Kiri says he's gonna take the baby to the waiting room to meet the squad/families. While neither guy likes being separated from either you or the baby this is once again where two husband's comes in handy cause at least both mom and baby are protected. Que some time later you perk back up, Bakugo is in a chair his head on the hospital bed alseep. You get his attention

"Katsuki, where's the baby?"

"With Kiri, remember?"

"yea, but he's been gone a long time. I think. ...." You can't be certain. After the day you've had time means very little to you at the moment. So Bakugou (reluctantly) leaves you to go find shitty hair. (Now this next bit is straight from a reddit thread but it was so damn cute and sounded just like Kiri!) So turns out, the Bakusquad and families left a bit ago, saying they'd be back when you were feeling better. But Kiri is a Proud Dad™️ so he just had to show off his baby. So he has just been walking around the hospital, being like 'look at my kid! My wife made her! They're both amazing! My wife made a person! Ignoring that you didn't quite make it on your own but you did the lions share of the work so let's not nit pick. Bakugou wants to be made at him but between the lack of sleep, and feeling the same fucking way and just being too emotionally constipated to say it to anyone besides his partners he just sighs.

"Shitty hair, you're worrying Y/N. Bring the baby back."

And they wander back and you're a nice happy little family. And sitting there holding your baby, a guy on either side of the hospital bed is bliss.

"can we have another one?"

Both you and Bakugou turn to the red head, and a brief silence falls over you three. Bakugou is getting ready to tell him off, like the baby is less than 6hrs old, don't get ahead of yourself dumbass.

But you speak first "yea. I'd like that a lot."

And that is how your first two kids (and probably the majority) were born a little less than a year apart. I just love the headcanon that Kiri wants a school of baby sharks. Like, however many you'll give him he'll have (Bakugou may have an Upper limit). At least those prohero dollars mean money isn't an issue. I also just love love love Kiri as a girl dad! He does tea parties, lets them paint his nails, learns to braid their hair and dances with them where they stand on his feet! Bakugou will also do all of these things but some of them may take a set of puppy dog eyes to get him to do. Also I know it seems misplaced but I don't wanna forget to put it in here. Itd be hilarious if when you struggle to find maternity clothes you like, one way or another Red Riot and Ground Zero both suddenly launch maternity merch lines!!!!!! And not just stuff with their logos/names like cute shit. Maybe you get to help design it.

B) this should be quicker. So imagine, youre at home. The guys have started paternity leave because youre 38wks. The ask why your face is scrunching up every once in awhile. You say and think it's braxton hicks contractions. You take a nap. Turns out. It's the real deal. You wake you guys up, they go into panic mode. You head towards the door (or even make it to the elevator for full comedic effect) before saying you gotta go back to the apartment, the baby is coming to fast. The guys freak out at first once they're in the apartment again. But they get ahold of a concierge doctor or something (pro hero money man) and between the doctor coaching them and you telling them they better hold it together, it all goes off smoothly and you go to the hospital to get check out and basically ends the same as above.

The baby chaos just made me cackle like a dang evil witch

#bnha simping hours #kirishima x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #pregnant #poly ship

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valatheapprentice · 3 years

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Echoes of the Past

Brought to us by @arcana-echoes

Vala Quintus

Hometown

Vala was born as Princess Alexandra Cirillo in the kingdom of Sparta. She wasn't allowed to go out into the kingdom. The few times her hand maiden would allow her to sneak out, shed find herself in a rowdier part. Despite being loud and reckless, they seemed to be very mindful and playful with her. She ran away at 6 and came to Vesuvia, where she was adopted and lived a fairly normal childhood in a nice neighborhood

Parents (mentions abuse)

Her birth parents were very cordial at best. They were very patriotic, proud and loving of their kingdom. When their son, valas older brother, was born, they loved him about as much. Years go by and they make a deal with the devil. Im exchange of their children's magic, he would be sure sparta lived on forever and that their children would go down in history. Since their son had no magick and an only child then, they agreed. A few years go by and they give birth to vala. While they loved her at first. That changed the moment she displayed magical abilities. With fear of the devil and magick being outlawed and detested , they would lock her in a cellar and place shackles on her to prevent her using said magic. By age three, Centaurs had threatened the kingdom. In exchange for being left alone, her parents agreed to let her be taken from time to time to entertain them, beating and r*ping her when they had gotten drunk. At this point they had seen her as more of an object and annoyance. When she ran away, war broke out and they died in that war.

Her adoptive parents were a lot different. They found her on the beach and took her in, despite originally not wanting kids. With nightmares and being former royalty (now kept secret) came behavior issues they had to help her overcome. They were extremely patient but stern. They gave her a fun and warm home and she lived 9 years as a fairly normal and happy child until her mother died when she was 15. She learned to cook and got her sense of humor from them. They signed her up for belly dance lessons, which she uses along woth her root work. Which they encouraged her into practicing.

Magick

She first showed signs of magick at age 2, but didn't really know it. As she got older she realized she could do things but was quickly punished for doing them. Once she was able to harness her power, she realized she was strongest with fire and chaos magick. She found some travelers and learned root work and conjuring from them. Which she continued researching and practicing after they left. She also has a strong connections to spirits and works/talks to them often

Education

She was heavily tutored as a princess, forced to learn Italian, and law despite being told she could never amount to anything due to her duties. In Vesuvia, she attended a public school until she dropped out at 15. Due to her love of dance and her Magick type, choir and science were her favorite subjects

The "aunt"

In her teens, she had been in trouble with the law frequently. Once she got back on her feet, she found qnd abandoned home and more or less squatted in it. She fixed it up with asras and her dads help and turned it into her shop "Magick and Mayhem". As soon as they started getting business, she was able to pay rent for it. The police she dealt with before let her slide of some formalities so they can keep seeing her stay out of trouble

Friends

In Sparta, her only friend was her handmaidens son, whom she rarely played with. In vesuvia, she had a habit of befriending colorful characters. One she was close to before she dropped out happened to be the daughter of a crime boss, Stella (another oc and LI for valerius)

Occupation (mentions substance abuse)

She dropped out of school after becoming dependent on drugs and entering an abusive relationship with her dealer. Despite helping forgive his debt in unsavory ways, she learned /some/ business skills through selling for him after a few years, such as negotiations.

Familiar

Her familiar is a possum named Arthur. She found him in a box labeled "free kitty" and couldn't resist. They are able to communicate and heal eachother. Hes able to sense peoples energy and his reactions can be seen as a warning for her. Together, they can manipulate the energy in anyone and anything. Its just a matter of if the want to or should

First loves (mentions abuse)

She had one love before meeting asra. Pete Uchiha (street name Ocho) was her dealer turned boyfriend when she was 15. Despite the good times she clung to and being too young to know better, he mentally, physically, and sexually abused her and forced her into dealing for him and attacking people who owed him. After 2 years of his paranoia and control. She met asra when he was homeless and a thief. They quickly went from being friends to facing an affair.

Cuisines

Growing up with her new family, her dad absolutely loves making chili and spicy beer chicken. While she could eat those everyday, she and her mom loved anything involving shrimp and gyros.

Defining moment (mentions substance abuse, attempted suicide, and crimes)

While she was considerate of others and wanted to be nice to everyone, she had little foresight, no impulse control, and often just thought of herself. The moment that really made her change her life was when she was 19. She had discovered she she could make any surface become soft and safe to land on. So she, Pete, and mutual friends would go onto a roof top, get high And basically fall into a dumpster. This went on for years until one day, her friend jumped and missed the spot, killing him. Once she realized what happened she was grief and guilt stricken and tried to overdose. Luckily, she was found and taken to the hospital where she started to detox. Later on she was arrested for manslaughter but was released on probation. That was the moment she realized she couldn't live like that. Pete was put on jail, she broke things off, and swore to never get high again and makeup for every wrong shes everyone, or try, since she finds herself responsible for the war as well. Still is and always will be, impulsive though

Holidays

She is a pagan, worshipping the Greeks gods (patron is Hermes, arcana is judgement). She follows the basic pagan holiday wheel. She will give either food drink or dance offerings and meditate to give her thanks to them and the spirits

Aftermath

After she had died, outside of asra, her father was completely grief stricken. Customers and neighbors felt sorry for their loss, a few even missing her and her energetic and kind energy. When asra brought her back, everyone knew something messed up happened and looked at them like outcasts. She has absolutely no memory and has to relearn how to talk, so this confused and disheartened her greatly. When asra told her dad, they got into a huge fight, her dad angry for putting more turmoil in their lives. So far (in my stories at least) he can't bare to face her, knowing she doesn't remember him yet/anymore

In another life

If she hadn't have left sparta. She would have died. Lets be real.

Given how she got the plague (kissing lucio, in a story ill post), it could have been avoided but then asra wouldn't have needed to be at the palace in her place and who knows what would have happened if lucio got his way in the ritual. Even ignoring that, when shed face asra again, it wouldn't have worked out. At least nothing would be easily forgiven. She'd probably be a numb and tired person after

If she had left with him, I think she'd feel guilt for leaving. Like itd be a happier life, being safe with asra in a new place, but I see her being more depressed and submissive. She just agreed to leave her home and father to rot in her mind.

Freebie

So, and I didnt know why until my husband helped me figure it out, but I always imagined her and julian getting married before having kids and her and lucio getting pregnant before getting married. Im one for diving deep into the psychology of my and other characters. While she and julian are no where near innocent and all, they tend to have a more wholesome relationship. She is very headstrong and a switch. Julian is in my mind a switch but is more submissive in personality. Lucio is just as headstrong as well as temperamental. So they but heads a lot and can be seen as a very emotionally charged couple. She does believe love is an action more so than a feeling, thanks to her adoptive mom and dad, and not many people put up with his shit out of love, so they do put the effort onto each other. So the more traditional route, in my mind I guess is better fit for julian and the chaotic route fits lucio better. (Idk I love doing deep dives into this kind of thing. Like ill spend hours talking to my super smart husband or researching to find the correct mindsets)

#the arcana apprentice #the arcana game #the arcane mc #the arcana #echoes of the past #arcana eotp #the arcana asra #the arcana julian #the arcana lucio #oc backstory #my oc stuff

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hermannsthumb · 5 years

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for the summer prompts if you want you could do family reunion. it could be a fun and interesting dynamic

YES i think id like to make this into a longer fic itd be so fun, so thats why it cuts off where it is and has the long setup hehehe

13: Family Reunion

from summer prompt memes here

---------------------------------------------

"I should probably warn you,” Newt says over breakfast, after a few minutes of poking his fork into his room service pancakes (which have been steadily growing soggier) and twirling his orange juice straw between his index finger and thumb.

Hermann sets down his own fork with a small sigh of relief, and Newt has a feeling it’s not just because the unusual (for them) silence was leaving him on edge. “Oh, good,” he says. “I was about to say the same thing. You first.”

"It’s just,” Newt continues, “well, my family’s...they’re kind of a lot.” It’s important to him they go over this now, before Hermann’s inevitable Geiszler Culture Shock during the actual reunion this coming Tuesday. Give him plenty of time to prepare himself.

“I’d be strange if they weren’t,” Hermann says. “I’ve met your father, you know.”

“I know,” Newt says. “They’re just...loud. And nosy. They’re going to ask a million questions about you, and us, and our--” He gestures between them. “--Thing.”

“Our thing,” Hermann repeats.

“Yeah,” Newt says. “Our--” He mimes something obscene. “You get me?”

There is a brief moment of uncomfortable silence. Newt would have liked to say relationship, because he was under the impression that’s what they have, and he doesn’t think it’s too much of a leap--they share a bed, after all, and occasionally get up to shenanigans in it--but they’ve never labeled it officially and he’s worried about unintentionally making Hermann uncomfortable. “I understand,” Hermann says. “My family is the opposite.”

This is the reason they’re all the way over here in some quaint little German bed and breakfast, after all, instead of going through paperwork or cleaning up old specimen tanks in their Hong Kong lab like they probably should be: Geiszler and Gottlieb family reunions, both scheduled, coincidentally, a week and a decent (but manageable) drive apart from each other. They made a two week long vacation out of it, with the first week--this past week--spent doing dumb touristy things and eating non-rationed food. They have the time to do fun shit like this these days, after all; no more impending doom, no more weight of the world on their shoulders, no more overworking themselves until they collapse into an insensible heap on the lab couch only to be discovered by the graveyard shift janitor at three in the morning. Besides. If Newt and Hermann intend to keep getting up to shenanigans in shared bed, they’ve got to Meet the Families eventually. This way is just tackling it all at once.

“No shit,” Newt says sarcastically. “I’ve met your father too.”

While their recent outing with Newt’s dad had been nice and fun and causal--he bought them dinner--their only run-in with Hermann’s, accidentally, at a banquet during the war had been anything but. Newt recalled a lot of shouting (on his own end), louder shouting (on Hermann’s father’s end), and mortified silence (on Hermann’s end). And that was before Newt and Hermann even started getting up to shenanigans together. “You certainly have,” Hermann says. “Er. Please don’t be too offended, but I don’t imagine most of them will be very polite to you. They’ll have heard about the incident in Anchorage with Father by now. And most of them--well. Most of them don’t approve of me.”

Newt’s face splits into a grin. “They don’t approve of you?”

The tips of Hermann’s ears go red. “Of my career,” he says, “my, er, lifestyle, the career of the man I’ve chosen to share it with...” This, considering what little Newt knows about the extended Gottlieb family, makes sense: Hermann continuing to work on the jaeger program even after his father publicly turned his back on it must’ve been a real shock, and Newt was, after all, Hermann’s research partner throughout it all. Hermann being gay is just the metaphorical cherry atop that. What he says next throws Newt for a loop anyway. “I was also a bit rebellious in my youth. I don’t imagine they’ll have forgotten that.”

This time, Newt full-on snorts in disbelief. “Rebellious?” he echoes. “Holy shit, what’d you do? Get straight A’s instead of A-pluses?”

Hermann’s blush spreads down to his neck. “Er. Something along those lines,” he says. “At any rate. I suppose I’m what you may deem the black sheep of the family.”

“No fucking way,” Newt says delightedly. “Man. I can’t fucking wait for this.”

They check out of the bed and breakfast the next morning and start the two hour ride to Hermann’s childhood home, where they’ll be spending the next few days. They could’ve spent the entire time in Hermann’s old bedroom if they wanted and bypassed paying for a hotel entirely, but Hermann was deeply opposed to it--his siblings would not be arriving until today either, and the thought of being alone in a house with his parents clearly made him uncomfortable. Newt didn’t even bother suggesting it as an option.

“I can’t believe you grew up on a farm,” Newt says when they finally begin to pull down Hermann’s long gravel driveway. Because it is totally a farm--huge property and rolling fields and all--and Hermann has, conveniently, neglected to tell Newt this.

“It’s not a farm,” Hermann says. “Er. It’s--farmland. There’s a difference.”

They drive past a cow.

“It’s totally a farm, dude,” Newt says, waving hello at the cow. It doesn’t acknowledge him. “Did you have chickens, too? Pigs?”

“I had a cat,” Hermann concedes, and then Newt forgets all about pestering Hermann about the cow because the farmhouse finally comes into view behind the tall trees, and wow. It’s big--at least enough for each of the Gottlieb kids to have their own bedroom, Newt’s sure--with a wrap-around porch and a spacious yard. After craning his neck around, Newt spots more cows meandering through a fenced-off meadow nearby, and more excitingly, a large pond a brief walk away. There are ducks on it.

“A farm,” Newt repeats. “You grew up on a farm. Wow.” He thinks he can be forgiven for being a little incredulous about it all: the little Hermann’s shared about his childhood made it seem like he lived out his days chained up in some sort of drafty gothic castle before he eventually fled in the dead of night for uni. This beats the first six years of existence Newt spent in a shitty Berlin apartment by a mile.

Hermann parks their rented car in an empty bit of grass further away from the patch of gravel where another half-dozen-odd cars are and switches off the engine. Then he stares at the windshield for a very long time.

“I haven’t been here since I was a teenager,” he finally says. His knuckles are white around the steering wheel. “Even before that--it was mostly only summers. I went off to a boarding school when I was quite young.”

“Summers must’ve been...nice here,” Newt says cautiously. He’s worried he might strike a nerve without meaning to; it’s very easy to do that with Hermann, after all, especially when it comes to talking about his childhood. Newt used to do it all the time without meaning to. And sometimes, when he was pissed at Hermann, he used to mean to do it. He doesn’t feel very good about that these days.

“I would take my telescope out to the field,” Hermann says, “or up to my brother’s treehouse, on days when I could manage the ladder.”

His eyes dart down to the keyless ignition, and his index finger twitches, as if he’d like nothing more than to press it; Newt reaches over and places his hand on Hermann’s arm in a way he hopes is soothing. “Hermann,” he says. “We can leave now if you want. We don’t have to go in.”

Hermann worries at his lower lip for a moment, then his whole body seems to sag. His hands drop into his lap. “No,” he says. He works his jaw. “We’re going in.”

Newt nods.

They go inside. Newt can tell, instantly, which of the people milling about are related to Hermann by blood as opposed to marriage: they have Hermann’s fine cheekbones, his funny stick-out ears, his dark hair, and some--only a handful--have eyes almost the same warm brown as his, though without the little crinkles at the corners and Hermann’s delicate, fanning eyelashes. Unless Newt’s just biased in Hermann’s favor. A few of them nod tersely in Hermann’s direction; one older-looking woman outright avoids eye contact and speeds up a little down the hall.

Newt shuts the door behind them and gives the foyer a brief once-over. High ceiling. Neutral-colored wallpaper dotted with small roses. Neutral-colored carpet. A single vase of flowers on a pristine wooden side table. “It’s nice in here,” Newt lies.

“Hm,” Hermann says with obvious distaste. Then a strange look flits across his face. “Bastien,” he says over Newt’s shoulder, slightly louder. “Hello.”

Newt turns. Walking stiffly towards them down the hallway is a guy who looks unsettlingly like a taller, less pointy, and far more stylish Hermann. He stops a good foot away from them and nods just as stiffly. “Hermann,” he says, and Newt half expects them to exchange a firm, professional handshake. He knows Hermann’s not big on hugs, and he must’ve gotten that from somewhere, but come on. “I’m surprised you came. It’s good to see you.” His eyes sweep over Newt once. “Are you Dr. Geiszler?”

“You can just, uh, call me Newt,” Newt says. His mouth feels weirdly dry. He didn’t expect to get this fucking nervous.

“I’ve seen your photograph online,” Bastien says. His accent is thick, thicker than Newt ever remembers Hermann’s being on the rare occasions his learned pretentious English one slips and gives way to his natural one. It makes sense. He never left the country like Hermann did. “Hermann has mentioned you once or twice in emails.”

“He has?” Newt says, because that’s news to him, but Bastien’s already turned his attention back to Hermann.

“Father is in the backyard,” he says in a low voice. “If you were wondering.”

Hermann’s visible distaste returns. “Ah. Thank you. I’ll be sure to avoid it then.” He allows himself a tiny fraction of a smile. “It is nice to see you.”

"Bastien is only two years younger than me,” Hermann explains once he and his brother have nodded at each other once more and Bastien’s retreated back down the hallway. “I was always closest to him, out of my siblings.”

“I can tell,” Newt says, and, probably lucky for him, Hermann doesn’t pick up on the sarcasm.

Hermann takes him on a brief tour of the lower level of the house. It’s weird; for all the charm the outside has--from the vines creeping up the sides, the ancient shutters, the sagging porch, the beautiful hills--the inside is pretty, well, bland. There’s a pristine dining room. A pristine kitchen. A pristine living room, with couches more out of fashion than Hermann’s sweatervest and a fucking gorgeous piano that looks practically untouched. (Newt whistles when he sees it; “I took lessons once,” Hermann says, “I wasn’t very good.”)

The main point of Newt’s interest, though, the thing that really makes him stop dead in his tracks, is the single family photo resting atop the fireplace mantle. All six Gottliebs are lined up in a row: Hermann’s father, a woman Newt takes to be Hermann’s mother (she has his eyelashes and his wide mouth), a teenage, and much shorter, Bastien, two twenty-somethings that must be Hermann’s older brother and sister (all three with Hermann’s ears), and--

“Holy shit, Hermann,” Newt says, snatching up the picture frame for a closer look. “Is this you?”

It is, which Newt is sure of even before Hermann flushes beautifully and turns his eyes to the ceiling--there’s no mistaking that scowl or cane. The Hermann in the photograph is leaning against a wall, a good foot away from the rest of his siblings, and can’t be any older than eighteen. He’s got an undercut twice as severe as his current one. A cigarette dangling from between two fingers. And--Newt realizes with a jolt of something that might be called elation, or it might be called horror--an earring in one ear. “Ah,” Hermann says. “I did say I was--”

“This is the best day of my life,” Newt says. “I want a copy. I want three copies. I want to carry one around in my wallet. I can’t believe you had an earring!”

“He did it himself,” a woman lurking near the doorway with a drink in hand and Hermann’s cheekbones says. “With a sewing needle, wasn’t it?”

“A safety pin,” Hermann says miserably. “Hello, Karla.”

“Hermann,” Karla says. They exchange stiff nods. (This family is fucking weird, Newt thinks. Maybe Hermann really is an alien. It would explain a lot.) “Who’s your friend?”

Hermann touches Newt’s arm. “This is my...” He trails off, and Newt starts to wonder if he should jump in with a lab partner when Hermann finally coughs and says, “My Newton.”

Newt gives Karla a nervous little wave. The once-over she’s giving him behind her wire-frame glasses is twice as severe and scrutinizing as the one Bastien gave him earlier--far more Hermann-esque. Specifically, Hermann when Newt’s fucked something up and is doing a very bad job of hiding it. “Your Newton,” she says. “The biologist?” Newt and Hermann both nod. She looks satisfied. And a little disapproving. “You didn’t say he was coming. You may have to make up the guest room bed for--”

“There’s no need,” Hermann says, and a small blush blooms on his cheeks. “Newton and I will be sharing my bed.”

“Sharing?” Karla echoes. She narrows her eyes at Newt again. “Hm. You are his type.”

“Karla,” Hermann hisses. He looks mortified.

“Hermann was always bringing home boys like you,” she says to Newt. “Dyed hair, piercings, tattoos--”

“Karla.”

“All because he knew our mother and father hated it, of course,” she says. “That’s also why he--” She tugs on her earlobe, the same earlobe Hermann has pierced in the photo, and takes a sip of her drink. “He was always so difficult. And now, a,” she says the next word like it leaves a bad taste in her mouth, “biologist.”

Newt feels, vaguely, like he’s entered in a parallel universe, where Hermann Gottlieb is apparently some sort of bad boy rebel without a cause and not, in fact, Newt’s stuffy, uptight, stick-up-his ass lab partner who one time yelled at Newt for being too cheerful at work. “Difficult?” he says faintly.

“She’s exaggerating,” Hermann jumps in quickly. He tugs frantically on the sleeve of Newt’s leather jacket. “Newton, we should--”

“He used to stay out until three in the morning,” Karla interrupts, with something akin to glee on her face, “and come roaring in on the back of some boy’s motorcycle--”

“Holy shit,” Newt says.

“Newton,” Hermann says. “Upstairs, please.”

Newt places the photograph back on the mantle and scurries after Hermann as he clacks, furiously, from the room and past his sister (who merely nods at both of them again). Hermann doesn’t stop his furious clacking until they make it all the way up the creaky staircase, down the upstairs hallway, and through a door that he shoves open unceremoniously.

This is where Newt stops. He’s not sure what he expected Hermann’s childhood bedroom to look like, but he wasn’t expecting this. It’s undoubtedly Hermann’s though. The bedspread is dark blue, patterned with little white spaceships and orange comets, but looks recently washed, at least. There’s a model of the solar system hanging in the corner, clearly homemade. A heavy layer of dust on a desk in front of a window, where several advanced mathematics texts are stacked up. More spaceships on the faded wallpaper. A few perfectly straight and even posters, one of the phases of the moon from 2006 tacked to the back of the door. A messy bookcase.

Newt was expecting--more neutral colors, maybe. An ancient-looking abacus. Victorian schoolhouse chalkboard slates. He smiles. “This is your old room?”

Hermann eases himself down onto the edge of the bed. “Yes,” he says, and pats the bedspread. “I imagine we’ll fit here together tonight without a problem.”

“Yeah,” Newt says, and sits down next to him. He has a million things he wants to say: your family is fucking weird, what’s so bad about being a biologist, you weren’t lying about being a black sheep, huh, but what comes out, along with a wide grin, is “So. I’m your type?”

“Oh, don’t start,” Hermann says. “Karla was only teasing. She always teases.”

“You used to ride around on motorcycles,” Newt says, “with boys. Plural.”

Hermann darts his tongue out, nervously, over his bottom lip. “With one boy in particular,” he concedes. “Ah. A friend from school.” His blush returns. “He had a tattoo of a sparrow on his shoulder. He was my first kiss.”

Inspired, Newt leans in and kisses Hermann’s cheek. “Dude. That’s adorable.”

Hermann hides his face in his hands. “He had freckles,” he says.

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag #Anonymous

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elle-eedee · 4 years

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dcom daddies: ranked

whats up sluts i’m here to give you the content you did NOT know you needed: a foolproof algorithmic ranking of a mild selection of disney channel dads!

beast (descendants)

hotness scale: extremely tall (over a foot taller than me! this is Very Important to the scale) and he seems to be a mere thread’s width away from Unhinged at all times, which i love. i also think it’s very sexy of him to still have such a monstrous way about himself (what with the roaring and the growling) 20something years post-curse.... makes me wonder very vividly if such energies carry to the b*droom........ *clears throat* 10/10

quality of character scale: it eternally amuses me that beast seems to learn almost Nothing over the course of this trilogy. he’s literally pro-isle the ENTIRE time jsjdndjdjd..... not great considering it puts him directly at odds with his son (and, like, with social progress) but he Does seem to act the way he does with the kingdom’s safety in mind! plus when he’s not accidentally supporting magical fascism he’s super dorky. i love his goofy dance moves 7.5/10

total score: 17.5/20...... with this score alone you can tell this system isnt rigged bc if i had it my way he’d be winning

hades (descendants)

hotness scale: i hate his party city clown wig but i’m a total sucker for guys in makeup (EVEN THOUGH A DECENT SHADE OF LIPSTICK WOULD HAVE BROUGHT HIS ENSEMBLE TOGETHER. WHY DID THEY PROPOSE IT ON THE CHARACTER DESIGN WALL IF THEY WERENT GONNA FOLLOW THROUGH!!!) and i think the fact that hes Very Sleepy and doesnt own a dog makes him my dream guy 9.5/10

quality of character scale: he literally sings a song about how cool he thinks it is that he’s a shitty dad............ but he DOES come through when his kid needs him, so that’s nice i guess. i would have liked to see more of him but i’ll settle for reading and writing intricate fan works that delve into a hypothetical personality for him that’s mainly conjecture 7.25/10

total score: 16.75/20 i wanna see him in some preppy auradon clothes

jafar (descendants)

hotness scale: i wish i had nicer things to say about this man. he just....... bears so little resemblance to the original jafar it makes me :( maybe if he was more gangly, or if he carried himself w the same potent gay energy that og jafar has? itd also help it he wasnt a racist caricature. 4.5/10

quality of character scale: again, very much a racist caricature. jafar doesnt steal!!! why would This be what he chose to do with himself! but he does seem to be, perhaps, the least bad of the core four’s parents, which counts for something i suppose. 3/10

total score: 7.5/20 sorry bud

dr facilier (descendants)

hotness scale: listen. it’s dr facilier. what am i supposed to do, NOT give him a perfect score on the sexy scale? 10/10

quality of character scale: he just loves his daughter and wants to make sure she’s getting what’s hers!!!!! his dynamic with celia makes me really happy they seem so fun! though i guess you could argue it sucks that he’d send his darling babey dohter to do errands for big mean scary hades considering that Everyone on the isle seems to quake at the sight of him. but im sure facilier only does that to ensure that celia can hold her own! 8/10

total score: 18/20 and it’d probably be higher if we’d seen more of him

mr smee (descendants)

hotness scale: not only does this man fuck, judging by the ages of his kids he fucked RECENTLY. get it baby live your truth 7/10

quality of character scale: he seems to be SO kind and sweet to his baby sons..... holding their little hands and such!!! and judging by how nervous the kids are i’d imagine it was primarily smee’s idea for them to go to auradon. extremely noble sacrifice for their benefit even though he’ll miss them 10/10!!!!!

total score: 17/20 i want to kiss his hand, if he’ll have me

zevon necrodopolous (zombies)

hotness scale: every time i look at this man i think of this post. he’s the perfect amount of frumpy for my tastes and his voice is so unique!!!!! i’d let his z-band malfunction so he could *** ** ***** * ******* **** 9/10

quality of character scale: really really cares about his kids and wants them to be safe!! he raises his voice once which im not a huge fan of but i suppose it was justified given the circumstances. also that shot of him goofing about with d*le in the end scene shows remarkable capacity for forgiveness after decades of trauma and discrimination! what a guy. 9/10

total score: 18/20 an absolute dilf!!!!!

dale (zombies)

hotness scale: looks like an uncrustable. 0/10

quality of character scale: a fucking cop. die bitch! 0/10

total score: 0/20 get in since you wanna act clown

coach jack bolton (high school musical)

hotness scale: honestly pretty young for my tastes. and i literally Always swipe left on athletes, so..... fine looking, but not for me. 5/10

quality of character scale: obviously he grows as the series progresses but i feel like jack is Always in the way of troy getting what he wants, which sucks. i like that he’s kinda goofy on his off hours with his family exactly as much as i Hate how much he yells when hes on the job. i do wish we lived in the timeline where he and miss darbus actually had that duet about their disagreements, though. 5/10

total score: 10/20 truly an Average dcom daddy

vance evans (high school musical)

hotness scale: due to personal reasons i will be having bad taste. however, this man’s fashion sense in IMPECCABLE. i mean, the colors??? the unbuttoned collar???? come on now. there is also the gratuitous use of the d-word to consider......................... anyways 7.5/10

quality of character scale: it’s hard to tell how much of his interest in furthering troy’s career is out of sincerity and how much of it is sharpay nudging him. but either way the result is a man who supports his daughter unconditionally! he could be nicer to ryan, though (plus he’s an evil capitalist) 6/10

total score: 13.5/20 i feel like he and fulton have had Relations

mr gifford (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: listen, i’m a simple guy. i see a basic-looking man pursuing age gap romance in the midst of a mid-life crisis, i support him unconditionally. also i am just Really vibing with that oversized denim shirt on him!!! there’s an egregious amount of arm hair poking out that just works. good for him! and this is a small moment but i’m very flustered over his natural Touchy Feely instinct after wen pokes out his eye... however: man has no eyebrows. 8.5/10

quality of character scale: i’m not a child of divorce so i don’t know how this stuff works, but i feel like he springs a lot of major decisions on wen? not ideal. on the other hand, we DO stan that he has sydney move in before they’re married. this is not a christian home!!!! 6/10

total score: 14.5/20 probably my favorite lemonade mouth dad, but mostly because he’s like the only one paid any attention by the narrative

mr banjaree (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: men really have beautifully sculpted noses and we just let them, huh. i’m definitely overusing the word Handsome in this list, but in this case? i’m justified. mr banjaree’s beard suits him SO well and his hair looks so soft...... and we love the implicit cleanliness of a man who wears socks in the house! 8/10

quality of character scale: i super SUPER dont agree with this man’s Smothering-Adjacent Methods (and also i know firsthand that strict parentage just drives kids to be more rebellious, lmao) but all things considered he really just wants the best for his family PLUS he’s willing to meet mo halfway at the end! :’) 6/10

total score: 14/20 the way i feel about him is the way i feel when i get crushes on pastors in that You Are Complicit In My Trauma But We’re Gonna Kiss About It way

mr delgado (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: OOOOH GLASSES! 5/10

quality of character scale: it’s sort of implied that the Wacko Energies of charlie’s family are mostly the fault of his mom so it’s cool of this man to distance himself from that. he is, of course, still complicit in Whatever The Hell Her Deal Is unless he is constantly fighting with her offscreen 6/10

total score: 11/20 would have loved to see more of him

mr yamada (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: another chapter in the saga of unbuttoned collars! doesn’t get a lot of opportunities to show off his strengths but i appreciate that he is not the thinnest dad in town 6.5/10

quality of character scale: WOW fuck this guy. very dismissive of stella’s aspirations!!!!! i don’t like that he feels the need to talk Over her to her mom when he’s asking about her vegetarianism. dude she is right there.... however it’s a lil touching when he holds her guitar up at the end, so... 4/10?

total score: 10.5/20 *thinks about his slightly protruding tummy in his last scene* *thinks about his slightly protruding tummy in his last scene* *thi

bob duncan (good luck charlie: it’s christmas!)

hotness scale: in keeping this Specific to the feature-length xmas special, i will say that bob duncan is QUITE handsome! disappointed that he was wearing a shirt in the scene at the pool.... ill bet if this movie came out post-workout/makeover he’d have been shirtless >:/ i feel robbed... spare tummy, sir? spare tummy? additionally i love a man who rolls up his sleeves AND a man who stans kaiju movies!! also i love that he, quite literally, canonically fucks 8.5/10

quality of character scale: he’s about as charmingly incompetent as he is in the show, but the difference here is that he literally did not do a damn thing wrong! all he wanted to do was be civil with his inlaws and he frankly deserves MUCH better. its clear from his banter with the kids that he loves them very much (also i love how frequently he feels the need to jump/dive for things in this movie. silly slapstick icon) 8.75/10

total score: 17.25/20 this man’s mere presence oozes nostalgia

jerry russo (wizards of waverly place: the movie)

hotness scale: this man was MADE for me. the bottomless collection of hawaiian shirts....... the TWO tummy out scenes..........the fucked up evil thing his voice does when the kids try to steal the spellbook!!! he really has it all. also i love that he is truly just trying to have some beach intercourse 9/10

quality of character scale: i love that even when he doesn’t remember the kids he still maintains a little dadly rapport with them? the instincts...... it’s also incredibly good of him to relive his decision to give up his magic without hesitation once he realizes the severity of the situation :’0 10/10

total score: 19/20 i’ve never seen an episode of the show but im really about to start

neil morris (dadnapped)

hotness scale: handsome....... mr morris makes me feel simultaneously like a sapiosexual AND a morosexual because although he completed enough schooling to become a dentist, he also threw it away for a writing career like an absolute champ. also i find it unbelievably charming how Along For The Ride he is about the idea of being kidnapped. a man after my own heart 8.25/10

quality of character scale: this is a tricky one...... neil DOES show active concern for his daughter’s safety when push comes to shove, but he also has my least favorite type of redemption arc: “you THOUGHT i was neglecting you, but actually i was thinking about you the whole time and just never expressed it! we good?” so like. bleh. but he’s pretty mild mannered which i deeply appreciate in a man! 6.5/10

total score: 14.75/20 maybe talk to your daughter instead of writing a macgyver ripoff, dumbass

major joe mason (princess protection program)

hotness scale: prime dad bod, very believable for his line of work. also he has such a Gentle Way about himself when he’s around princesses....... i love all the hand holding when he’s escorting rosie. absolutely my type 8.75/10

quality of character scale: gosh.... where do i even BEGIN!!! his whole dynamic with carter is so ideal... i was apprehensive at first because his job would require him to be Absent a lot of the time, but upon reflection it’s clear that he’s raised carter well enough that he can totally trust her to be on her own, and also she’s only sad to see him go because she sincerely enjoys his company. everything about his profession is so noble and i love the way he can carry himself as casually or as politely as a given situation calls for. worst thing he does is say “i might have to stop calling you ‘pal’” because his daughter is wearing a pretty dress. i wish he was my dad but i’ll settle for him being my husband 9.75/10

total score: 18.5/20 i almost made a ppp self insert this morning specifically for Him

ted thompson (zapped)

hotness scale: athletes arent sexy!! this guy’s face screams The Only Websites I Know How To Use Are Facebook And Reddit and also he’s a dog person BUT he is sporting quite the tumbey if i do say so myself and for that i shall let him live. 4/10

quality of character scale: ok i know the whole point of this movie is Boys Bad but i hate men who are loud and i hate dads who get Weird about the inherent femininity of their daughters. when he calls zoey “sport” and then cringes like he’s made a mistake? dumb and unnecessary. HOWEVER all of his efforts to bond with zoey are really really sincere. like when he fixes her music box? that has NOTHING to do with the app he just Does It!!!! the movey mightve rubbed off on me a little too much but there are multiple ways to show love and just bc im not used to his way doesnt mean it has no worth! 6/10

total score: 10/20 mr thompson sir im sorry i doubted you at the start of the film

rob adams (radio rebel)

hotness scale: this man dresses 5-10 years younger than he looks and i respect that for him. but i was expecting him to be a bit more of a slimeball considering how tara talks about him in the opening scene... and you guys know how much i love slimeballs. regardless, pretty handsome! 6.5/10

quality of character scale: it’s nice that he goes to such a Public and Corporate effort to connect to his stepdaughter! even if it’s in a way that financially benefits him, it’s pretty clear that he cares about this family and wants to do right by them. nothing exceptional, though 7/10

total score: 13.5/20 i GUESS i’d be down to smash if he asked

ralph bartlett (read it and weep)

hotness scale: ok i was gonna say something mean about the fact that he’s balding but honestly he has really nice arms........ in addition he’s really quirky and optimistic which i am going to admire into my grave!! when he gets excited about having customers during the finale his voice quirks with an almost charlie day-esque charm. handsome. ALSO he calls jamie “princess” which is!!!!!!! something 7.5/10

quality of character scale: the way ralph parents his kids is Very 2000s in that he kinda babies his daughter but gets to pal around with his son, but i guess both dynamics come from a place of love and he could be doing much worse. plus he’s an honest hardworking small business owner! i support him 7/10

total score: 14.5/20 i would definitely go out for pizza with him

dr james hartley (how to build a better boy)

hotness scale: THIS. THIS IS WHAT DCOM DADDIES ARE ALL ABOUT. gosh..... this is truly the Most dad ive ever seen in my life. i love how his hair is always mussed..... how he’s so Desperate to relax that he falls asleep after Fifteen Seconds of smooth jazz..... and also. like. hes a scientist?? hello??? pretty sexy of him. i want to give this man the relaxation he deserves 10/10

quality of character scale: ok so,,,...,, kinda fucked up that he lied to his whole family (with the possible exception of his wife—sidenote, WHY did they make dr hartley married? his wife never comes up except when bart says she’s out of town. let him be single so i can slide into those dms) and EXTRA kinda fucked up that he works for the government? what a scab. BUT it’s very very clear that he cares about his kids (and gabby) and prioritizes their safety above all else! also, did you SEE how happy he was when mae won homecoming queen....... he loves her so so so much! :’0 8.5/10

total score: 18.5/20 i thirst tweeted about this man and roger bart replied ‘Aw, thanks!’ so i dont know where to go from here

#my worst post. look at it everybody #descendants #high school musical #disney channel #lemonade mouth #wizards of waverly place #good luck charlie #zombies #princess protection program #read it and weep #zapped #dadnapped #radio rebel #how to build a better boy #the term 'dcom daddy' was coined by poddin this together so nobody's allowed to get mad at me for it. also im right about each of these

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anastasiaskarsgard · 5 years

Text

Meeting Roman Godfrey

Chapter 1

Warning - cursing.

I never thought I’d miss traffic and noise. I always took it all for granted, hated it even. But now itd be a welcome old friend. Instead here i was, in a town with a handful of stop lights and not even one mall. You had to go on a road trip, to experience civilization, but I loved my uncle and he needed me... even if he wouldn’t admit it.

I spotted a Barnes and Noble and actually squealed in excitement. i pulled up in my big body Benz and looked a little bit out of place, but i didnt care. My car was understated low profile over the top. With its clear panoramic sunroof, so much technology, and ambiance lighting, id always kid with my uncle that i needed it for my mental health. Really I was terribly spoiled and I knew it, yet I appreciated it and never tried to rub it anyone’s face and NEVER bragged.

inside there was a shockingly big lego display and i remembered how much i used to love assembling complicated structures, while most girls played wth dolls. People never interested me, like how machines and structures did. While most little girl wanted to play with dollies and imagine scenarios about their weddings and husbands, I was trying to improve my laptop (catching a few on fire in my early years).

I walked over and spotted a gigantic Death Star set and clapped in delight, when i heard a chuckle behind me. I turned around to find the best looking man I’d ever seen, dressed in a very nice suit for New York, let alone this shit hole town. He didnt waver or look away when i looked at him and almost looked as though he were daring me to look away. My god he was shockingly gorgeous but looks never have intimidated me, not much of anything does.

“What’s funny?” I asked looking him dead in the eye.

“You.” He smirked.

“Your face is funny.” i huffed and rolled my eyes. Who did he think he was? Green eyed, puffy lipped bastard.

To my surprise he laughed and looked me up and down. Assessed me like i was livestock. sizing me up and trying to decide if he could break me.

“I’m Roman.”

“I’m American.” I replied.

“No my name is Roman.” He laughed heartily. An amused twinkle in his eye.

He really had the best smile, and I really have a thing for noses, if you think about it, its the most imprtant facial feature. A nose can make or break a face, and his cute little slightly upturned nose with its perfect symmetry was for sure making it. combine that with gorgeous green eyes, long lashes, defined bone structure and standing at least 6′3″ he must be one of the biggest pains in the ass, this side of the Mississippi!

If i was the type to give a shit, I might feel self conscious in my velvet Juicy track suit with my hair in a sloppy pony tail and not even a stitch of make up but luckily i was not. Why pretty boy wanted to trade names, probably had nothing to do with me, and much more to do with what he could get out of me. I usually didn’t pay much attention to anyone of the opposite sex, I just didn’t have the patience or interest, but something about this one...

“Generally when I tell someone my name, they oblige me with their own.” He said staring into my eyes with such an intensity that I reacted almost involuntarily.

I have a defect. If someone tries to tell me what to do or control me, I am not fucking having it. Authority has always been an issue, and this was no different. I bet he isnt used to being ignored, and i do enjoy helping people expand their horizons so i turned around and acted like I hadnt heard him.

He walked in front of me, blocking my view of the legos and ducked down a bit to get eye contact. He’s either crazy or incredibly confident. I raised my eyebrows as if to say “can i help you” and I know my face was absolutely sassy.

His face hardened “tell me. Your. Name.” He said slowly and deliberately.

Now it was my turn to laugh. I looked at him to see the smile or just kiddding , but it never came... WOW. So I leaned my face a couple inches from his face and I said “ha. Ha. Ha.”

The look on his face was absolutely priceless and just as I was about to walk away victorious, his nose began to bleed. Probably a coke head, i thought but I was pretty bored in this town so I figured I’d give him the benefit of the doubt and help him out.

“Oh shit, your nose is bleeding.” i said lookinbg around for any type of tissue, when i noticed we were right next to the restrooms.

“What? Seriously? Can you get it?” he implored looking all frightened, dare I say fragile.

Without any hesitation, I wiped the blood from his face. “Come with me, we need tissue, bathroom is right here. Look up and hold your nose.” I grabbed his hand and recieved a shock. static electricity stayed with me a lot and often scared people but he didnt even flinch. He laced his fingers in mine as if it were the most natural thing in the world and i led him to the bathroom.

Once inside, I grabbed some tissues and directed him to stand over the sink. I wet some paper towels and wiped away the blood and then took took the dry tissues and pushed his head back and crammed little tissue torpedos in his perfect little nose.

“Gotta admit, this is new.” He quipped, admiring my handy work in the mirror and laughing in spite of himself.

“What? Bloody nose or a girl not being putty in your manicured hands?”

“Um.... all of it. You don’t listen, you’re kind of rude, but then when theres an issue, you dont hesitate to help and then you’re taking better care of my nose bleed than anyone. no one really takes charge with me.... and now I’m in a bathroom with a woman and we aren’t fucking.” He laughed again.

“Fucking. Classy. If I didn’t know any better I’d swear you were the Godfrey asshole everyone keeps telling me about.” Ever since I’d arrived at Hemlock grove, I’d heard Godfrey this and Godfrey that. Their name was on everything and I’d heard the son was like a 21 year old gorgeous ladies man that was as kind as he was humble.

His face fell into a frown.

“I see that’s the general consensus about that guy. Cheer up Charlie, your nose stopped bleeding most likely, let me just pull these out. i gently pulled the tissues from his nose and waited for blood but none came. “Boom mothafucka its on!” i laughed at my own ridiculousness before turning and washing my hands.

“You are ridiculous” he stated matter of factly.

Roman stood there quietly thinking. I could almost feel the wheels turning in his head. His mood had completely changed at the mention of the Godfrey kid.Maybe his family had lost everything because of them too or the guy stole this guys girl, i felt a little guilty so i relented a tiny bit.

“Hey listen, Roman was it?” He nodded and bit his lip. oh he knows what hes doing. boy he was trouble “I’m sorry if the Godfrey’s are a sore subject. I don’t know anything about anybody here. I’m just helping out my crazy uncle that fell down his basement stairs and broke his hands and neck. I’m from the west coast and this dreary fucking place isn’t exactly my cup of tea. I don’t know why I’m rude before I’m polite but it’s involuntary. My name is Letha, it’s like Lisa with a lisp and now I’ve officially over shared.” I could feel my face turning red. Why was He making me such an awkward mess? My God this WAS new.

suddenly he grabbed me by my shoulders and pulled me in stopping just an inch away from my face. “Who put you up to this?” He asked with such venom in his voice it made me flinch. “WHO!?!?!” He screamed in my face.

I tried to push him away but he wouldn’t budge. My mind raced and I began to panic. No one has ever screamed in my face like this and I didn’t like it and yet, the way his eyes searched mine and the tenseness in his body and just sheer panic made me do something I hardly ever did. Especially to a crazy stranger in the bathroom, but I had the overwhelming NEED to hug him. I fought past his hands trying to hold my shoulders in kind of a silly slap fight and grabbed him around the waist and buried my head in his shoulder. He smelled so good.This was outright crazy behavior for me, and i was confusing myself but if i tried to not think, it almost felt nice. A tense minute passed with me holding him as he calmed his breathing with his arms raised. If anyone walked in, it’d be pretty weird.

“Nobody sent me you nut job! Hug me back, you need a hug. And I am NOT a hugger.” i squeezed even harder, nuzzling my face into his collar, his chin gently resting on my head.

His arms hesitantly closed around my back and then he crushed me into a deep embrace. He really did need a hug. “You ok now crazy?” I asked trying to pull back to look at his face but he held me fast. He started to shudder a bit and it was then I felt the moisture hitting my forehead.

Was this crazy ass dude crying? Oh no he was really crazy. Shit shit shit. Good job Letha, you’re gonna get murdered in a bookstore bathroom in shit hole Pennsylvania on a Friday afternoon. Why did you hug this fucking guy? Are you crazy?

Roman loosened his grip and looked deep in my eyes searching for something. What? Im unsure, but he must of found it, because he laughed and looked almost sweet, except tears were running down his face and a moment earlier he screamed at me. Boy I can pick em.

“Well Ms Letha, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I’d love nothing more than to take you out this evening wherever you want to go. Before you refuse, I assure you I’m not crazy, it’s just I had a cousin named Letha, which I’m sure you’re aware is an unusual name, that I loved very much and she passed and I’m sorry. It caught me off guard.”

I had heard about that Letha. Everyone that found out my name, told me about Letha Godfrey, the Godfrey girl that was as kind as she was beautiful, but tragically got knocked up and lost her mind talking about angels being the father, and dating some weirdo outcast. when she went to give birth in the familys intimidating skyscraper medical facility, she mysteriously died and so did her baby.

“You’re the Godfrey kid.” I practically whispered staring at him with wide eyes as I tried to recall what I’d said about him TO him.

“Hardly a kid anymore I think.” He smiled. He was so handsome, it was freaking me out. “What’s your phone number? I have to run to the white tower, and then I’m all yours.”

I knew better. He was too good looking and too rich and too everything but something told me he needed me. I know it sounds crazy but I believed in my heart and soul, this perfect beautiful fucking legend of a man needed me. I can’t explain why. I told him my number and turned to walk out of the bathroom, but he grabbed my hand.

“Please answer.” He pleaded pressing a kiss to my hand. He wasn’t trying to make me do anything now. He was giving the power over to me and i was honestly taken aback a bit by the almost desperate look in his eyes. I knew in my heart, he genuinely needed me, but for what?

I can’t explain the feeling I felt in that bathroom with this man, but when I say I felt a deeper connection to him than I’d ever felt in my 22 years on this earth, I mean it. It was thrilling, and scary, and strange. I smiled at him and nodded my head.I tried to lie to myself and act like i wasnt going to answer but dammit I so was.

Maybe it would work in my best interests favor that my uncles’ home was 50 miles outside of town in a very isolated area so I doubted once I told him where hed have to pick me up, he’d actually follow through.

He didn’t follow me out of the bathroom and I just made a bee line for my car. I had to go. I couldn’t help smiling from ear to ear. The cashier smirked at me with what I suspect a knowing glance. Boy oh boy did I know better than to get involved with this guy, but what was the worst that could happen?

#roman godfrey #hemlock grove #bill skarsgard #bill istvan günther skarsgård #bad boy #bad idea #letha #letha godfrey #fanfic #relationshit #meetingroman100 #my writing

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itsjustaphase-mom · 5 years

Text

Luther Hargreeves

ok listen. i know he is certainly not a fan favourite and i absolutely hated him the first few times i watched ua. but this time, i rewatched it specifically to try to sympathize with luther and guys there are so many things at play here

he doesn’t realize the extent to which his siblings were abused. he brushes klaus off and doesn’t think twice about locking up vanya again because he just assumes they had the same experience. he’s not being an asshole (on purpose), he just never stopped to think about the fact that being Hargreeves’ favourite made life a lot easier for him.

similar to the first note, he never stopped to consider the implications of having powers that hurt to use. he has super strength, something that, compared to some of the other powers in the family, is nothing. he just doesnt realize what seeing corpses is like, which is why he doesnt get klaus’ addiction (and to be fair, neither do the rest of his siblings). Same with Vanya. He doesn’t think about what it’s like to learn you have powers after being told you’re horribly boring and average your whole life, nor what it’s like to find out your memory was erased. he had it a lot easier than his siblings, but he doesnt think about that. that leads to some poor decisions and awful seeming actions, but keep in mind that we know a lot more than he does about his siblings. we’ve seen their pain but he hasnt. no one in this damn family communicates, so he just doesnt get it. i wish hed stop to think about how other people feel every once in a while, but itd also help if they just straight up said “hey being high keeps the gory corpses out of my field of view, im not a fan of this either” to help him understand. he wasnt taught empathy, but he tries for the most part. honestly, the fact that he turned out that nice considering what he grew up with? kind of incredible

hes not just obsessed with the moon. and to be fair, he has a right to it? i mean i havent stopped talking about this show for 2 months and ive had other things happening in my life. he was alone up there for 4 years. that doesnt give you much conversation material. and also, bringing up the idea that the apocalypse could be caused by the moon makes sense because, yeah, he was sent up there by their dad who knew about the apocalypse (whether luther was aware of that or not). He was up there to look for threats, so its not that odd to consider that the threat he was watching for could have caused the apocalypse...oh speaking of which HE WAS RIGHT ABOUT THE MOON IT DID CAUSE THE APOCALYPSE

i think a lot of people like to ignore the fact that he was also abused. sure, it wasnt to the extent of klaus or vanya but he had a horrible childhood nonetheless which messed him up too. he wasnt taught a lot of the things we take for granted so like i said earlier, the fact that he’s not completely deranged is astonishing

also can we mention the horrible trauma he went through? like lmao monkey man but oh my gosh can you imagine? he almost died (in a horribly painful way) and woke up months later with a fucking gorilla body. he’ll never look like a normal person again. he probably will never be able to look in the mirror and like what he sees (you can find out first hand what its like to be me so GATHER ROU-) yes everything Klaus went through was horrible but Luther has lived through some fucked up shit too and i think we like to ignore that because he’s not very likeable

the scene with vanya. it hurts me every time i think about it. HOWEVER. i understand why he did it. do i think he made the right choice? fuck no. but i get why he did what he did. Vanya was extremely dangerous. She caused the apocalypse. she literally killed everyone on earth. these arent things we should brush over. (and yes i love vanya but that’s not what we’re talking about here) she very nearly killed Allison, and he doesn’t know her well enough to know if she’s here to genuinely apologize or finish the job. He just knows he has a responsibility not only to his family, but to the entire world. so he makes a tough decision. it hurts him too, look at his face. he doesnt want to do it but he doesnt think he has any other options.

about dismissing klaus: he has good reason (at least in his head). klaus is intoxicated constantly, and like i mentioned before, he doesnt realize its because of his powers. he just thinks klaus is trying to have a good time, and to be fair, klaus tries to hide his vulnerability (for the most part) so luther wouldnt know any better. in the end when he tells him to be a lookout? justified. the man is heavily suffering from withdrawal (or intoxicated, to luther’s knowledge? i cant remember if luther knows or not or whether he believes him for that matter) which is gonna impact his reaction time, and he doesnt have powers that can help anyway (as far as luther knows). yes, he was trained alongside them and allison is allowed to help despite also lacking usable powers; however, she is in a clearer state of mind and a lot healthier. She can physically fight. Klaus just kinda...jumps on people’s backs for the most part. Did you see her fight Cha Cha? *swoons* no but seriously, Allison is still highly skilled and in far better shape than Klaus. He’s a liability and staying outside is safer for everyone (again, as far as luther knows) all this being said, the way he treats klaus when hes drunk is Disgusting, Abhorrent, and Unacceptable. i understand that he doesnt realise his own power but thats inexcusable

luther x allison is gross, i agree HOWEVER they were not raised as adopted siblings, they were raised more closely akin to a boarding school. their dynamic had always been romantic; they never saw themselves as siblings. yes, i do find it very odd that literally everyone else considers each other siblings, but im just saying that their dynamic has always been different and technically it’s not really incestuous (im not condoning it, i hate it personally i just can see why its not the worst thing ever? its still pretty yikes though. also shipping literally any other characters IS fucking gross because the rest of them see each other as siblings and always have so gtfo with klaus x diego or klaus x ben g r o s s)

those are the main complaints ive seen (and voiced myself)... basically it all boils down to the facts that 1. he was abused, just like his siblings 2. he doesnt stop to think about how other people are thinking or feeling 3. hes just trying to do what is best for his family (and the world). I sympathize with monkey man. He deserved better. I really hope in the next season he’ll pause to consider things every once in a while (and that klaus will open up because he’s not useless but he’s not explaining to anyone why he does the things he does and he needs to!!) so yeah was this basically just me yelling at me from a week ago? yes. does anyone care? probably not but i felt it had to be done. anyway im done ranting for now....if i missed anything lemme know

#luther hargreeves #tua #umbrella academy #casey talks #analysis #if i need to clarify smth plz tell me #if youve got other qualms with luther i can try to explain his thought process #i just understand the man so much better now #also fricc you carina and jayden here this is what i mean #i try so dang hard to be open minded and sympathetic so i was real mad at myself for not giving luther a chance #hey #judging people without thinking about why they act the way they do?#yall are actually just luther XD

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broken-endings · 6 years

Text

digimon tri 6 thoughts

spoilers below

It wasn’t “bad”

but it wasn’t as good as I wanted it to be

or as good as I thought it could be with everything they threw at us and introduced.

It’s like Supernatural. Immensely good at introducing intriguing plot points, and doing absolutely NOTHING with them.

wasted potential. If it didn’t introduce so many interesting things my hopes wouldn’t have been so high, but they did, so they were.

The mere absence of acknowledgement of the zero two kids or the events of zero two was like a huge thing for me, that weighted everything while we waited to find out why that was.

Only, we don’t find out what actually happened, and Tai immediately recognized them, so why did they not even KNOW or mention their missing?? We don’t even have an explanation as to why they might not be worried, like we never witnessed the organization tell them anything that would make them not realize those kids were missing.

They went to the same school, played on the same team, lived near each other.

So it’s just so weird and disappointing that the weirdness meant nothing. It colored my entire watching experience with exciting expectations, only for those expectations to become nothing. It was nonexistent. What I hoped would turn out to be brilliance was never on the screen and only in my head.

The kids were just here hidden in the digital world on life support. We never actually get to see the kids either, another let down.

Because this was the finale, and I had expectations of all these different plot points finally coming to a head, it would be the one i’m most disappointed in.

The zero kids had no weight in any of the story and never appeared aside from a faint silhouette. Tai’s finding them didn’t actually amount to anything. Nishijima and Himekawa, both were gotten rid of too soon. It felt WAy too rushed. She’s just in the dark ocean? And that’s the end of her? Maybe it’s supposed to be subtly poetic, like this is where Ken would’ve gone or Kari could’ve gone if they kept going down their paths that led them there if they didn’t have their friends, and they would’ve been trapped in the dark ocean for eternity.

It just didn’t feel that clear to me that that was the last we’d see of her. Maybe it’s a difference between storytelling in Japanese vs English. There’s certain unspoken expectations I have from stories based on what’s said, or isn’t said.

or maybe i’m right and it just was done poorly no matter who looks at it. I’ve watched a lot of anime in japanese and i’ve never had this big of a problem with reading into stuff, except for maybe samurai flamenco.

Didn’t they originally say it’d be 7 films? Am I imagining that? I feel like the original announcement that revealed itd be a movies series said that.

Cuz if that’s true, then that might explain my disappointment in dropped ideas. Maybe if they’d had another two hours of story to animate it would’ve touched on everything I thought it was going to, but they were cut one movie short and had to cut stuff and make it work.

if not and i really imagined it, and there was always going to be six films, then it’s just poor storytelling. or it’s like they took multiple scripts and spliced elements of them together that left all these hanging story threads.

My laundry list of complaints

They never used the zero two kids or their digimon

Never explained why no one noticed the zero two kids were missing, but still knew who they were. I thought maybe the real world had already been through a reboot and this was the second time these events were taking place.

Never explained the gennai/digimon emperor person. and that he just escapes into the digital world.

Yggdrasil is like a deus ex machina of a villain, never seen nor heard, also never explained who he is. and homeostasis can just “deal with him” without anyone’s help.

the original digidestined Nishijima and Himekawa didn’t factor into the main story, even though Himekawa was one of the main causes of the reboot.

The memories stored in Meicoomon meant that Tapirmon’s memories could theoretically be there too, and could remember Himekawa, even though she’s gone now. That idea’s never explored

Himekawa in the dark ocean not having some kind of explanation, and does it even matter she’s there if no one knows about it? I wish Nishijima knew what we got to see. It’d give it more weight.

Nishijima’s death felt cheap. If they’d made the zero two kids disappearance and everyone else not remembering them into an actual plot point, and had Nishijima reveal the truth to Tai, even then, his death would’ve been more meaningful. Also if they knew he was a digidestined or the story of him and Himekawa. They really rushed the brief explanation he gave Tai. It shouldn’t have been exposition. Show, don’t tell.

That the dark masters or the harmonious ones didn’t play a part in the plot beyond the flashback. At one point I thought the gennai emperor could be piedmon in disguise.

None of the harmonious guardians appeared once in present day, not even azulongmon.

The main digimon losing their memories didn’t really matter at all, beyond Sora and Biyomon, which only mattered in the beginning, but they too got over it. So them getting those memories back didn’t give any kind of satisfaction at all. Which is a pity because I liked the explanation as to them being what gave Meicoomon power and why Meicoomon didn’t forget. I just wish it mattered to the plot more.

That Meicoomon was the “main villain”

That Himekawa wasn’t the main villain

Because I was already disappointed in so much already, it automatically meant things like Tai’s return was cheapened

It built on its own history and lore, but didn’t actually USE that history or lore to make the plot more interesting

i’m sure there’s more but i’ve exhausted my list for now

What could’ve been:

I like the plot line I came up with in my last commentary. I thought that Homeostasis was going to be the main villain because it was corrupted by Himekawa’s obsession with finding a way to resurrect Tapirmon, because it was connected to Himekawa since she was its vessel the first time around.

So the plot would revolve around her backstory, the original digidestined, and the main villain would be a consequence of her own corruption, making the chooser of the digidestined the one needing defeating. Rather than destroy it they’d need to find a way to purify it, and only by confronting Himekawa and having her face the reality of what she’s done to others could they free homeostasis. The same way we got Ken’s epiphany and change of heart, and Oikawa’s epiphany and change of heart, I thought we’d get something along those lines. Or, maybe Himekawa wouldn’t be able to be saved, but rather, homeostasis could be purified if Nishijima gave up trying to save Himekawa and let her destroy herself. He needs to let her go.

It’d be so much better man. Rather than meicoomon being the main villain, her existence would all be because of Himekawa’s plan to resurrect her digimon by way of the reboot. To get the reboot she needed what Meicoomon was. So she was brought into existence to only be used, but is allowed to live in spite of how she was born.

but no. the villain was meicoomon the whole time.

#digimon tri #digimon #my commentary #spoilers #spoiler free tags

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privateayin-blog · 5 years

Text

Have you broken the law in the last three days?

Not that I know of.

Can you read other people’s expressions?

I think so yeah.

Have your friends ever randomly stopped by your house?

Not really spontaneously, we all have to make solid plans because of schedules and adulting 😂

Are you imagining someone naked right now?

Not until I read that 😇

Are you wearing a necklace? Who got it for you?

No I don't really wear jewelry.

What colour is your underwear, seriously?

White.

Do you walk around naked when no one’s home?

Not really.

Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly knew?

Sure.

Ever kissed a light-haired, light-eyed person?

Umm sure. Though I don't tend to go for fair haired guys.

Would you walk into Walmart naked for $16,000?

Hummm, probably not.

Who are your last five texts from?

Ben, Lisa, Claudia, Adam and Mike.

Have you ever sacrificed something for someone you love?

Yeah for sure

Name something you dislike about the day you’re having?

It's been okay actually, mega chilled.

Is it cute when a girl is immature?

Not at all.

Do you have a condom in your room?

Nope.

If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?

Oh that's tough, because part of me wouldn't want them to because I'm in a relationship but the narcissist in me would enjoy the compliment.

Ever seen someone just roll out of bed and still look hot?

Yep, Ben 😂

Do you like the colour purple?

Yeah.

Have you ever flown first class?

Yep.

Would you rather read books or magazines?

Books obviously because i have an IQ above 75.

Have you ever seen a shooting star?

I don't think I have actually.

How many times a week do you wash your hair?

Three-ish.

Do you own any plaid pants?

I don't...

Have you ever had food SO bad in a restaurant that you sent it back?

Yeah but I'm usually too polite.

Can you touch your toes without bending your knees?

I can.

Do you talk in your sleep?

Oh god yes. Like the most shit.

Have you ever fallen off a horse?

Almost once or twice.

Can you pick things up with your toes?

Yep.

Have you ever locked yourself out of your house?

Yeah, and Ben was at work so I went alone to the cinema alone to kill time.

Have you ever worn bell-bottoms?

I don't even know what they are.

Does anyone make you feel inferior? If so, who, and why? Do you feel superior to anyone? Who and why?

No, I don't think anyone makes me feel inferior actually. And yeah, I feel superior to several fucking people 😂😂 just because I know I'm better in all the ways a person can be.

Do you think someone is going to break up with you?

Nope.

Are you the type of person who can shake insults off easily, or do they tend to stick around in your brain & bother you?

It depends on who's said it. If it's some keyboard warrior I'd shrug it but if it's someone I know personally itd stick in my head.

Do you think you’ve gotten better looking or uglier with age?

Hmmm interesting. Just different I guess. Better in the way im more confident.

Have you ever got into a car accident?

I haven't actually which is a miracle considering how reckless I was in my youth.

What are you going to do after this?

Netflixxx.

Are you wearing jeans?

Nope, in bed wearing sweats.

Where did you buy the shirt you’re wearing now?

Topshop.

Has anyone ever called you a whore?

Oh yes haha. It's the prime insult thrown at me 😂🤣

Who were you last in a car with?

Big Ben.

Has anyone told you that you have pretty eyes?

Yep :)

Are you in a good mood right now?

Yeah pretty mellow and tired.

Is there anyone who you think you deserve an apology from?

Yeah for sure.

Have you ever played the guitar?

I've tried fooling around.

Could you handle living together with someone you hate?

No...

Do you ever take your anger out on others?

Don't we all sometimes?

Do you know what you want to be when you grow up?

Lol when I grow up. Well, I'm currently an English teacher but my ultimate goal is to be a social worker after my masters degree

Where’s your phone right now?

I'm on it.

Have you ever liked someone older than you?

Yeah, but 99% of the time I go for younger guys.

Are you the oldest child?

Nope.

Would you rather be called honey or baby?

Either.

Was the first person to text you today a boy or a girl?

Boyfriend texting me good morning 😇

Is there anyone who doesn’t like you because of something you did?

Plenty of people who don't like me, none of whom I give a fuck about.

Do you have any bruises?

Usually on my legs.

Did you mean ‘i love you’ when you said it last?

100%

I bet you’re talking to someone right now aren’t you?

Switching between this and WhatsApp.

If your doctor told you TODAY that you were pregnant, what would you say?

Fuck that. I'm happy with my two.

Is there someone who pops into your mind at random times?

Plenty of people.

Honestly, whats on your mind right now?

Just sleepy.

What are you wearing right now?

Jumper and sweats, bloody freezing English weather 😂

Have you had the chicken pox?

Nope.

Did you buy something today?

Does take out count 🤣🙄

Can a boy and girl be friends without having feelings for each other?

Yeah, one of my best friends is a guy

What’s your favorite color?

Red

What are you doing for your next birthday?

As if I know, it's ages away.

Were you happy when you woke up today?

I was happy to have a lie in

0 notes

forwyk · 7 years

Text

Romantic Frustration | Doyoung

Oaky,, doyoung,,

here I’m so soft for him I’m about to get giddy af

Alright I feel like he would be a big spooner in the sense that he loves spooning duh@me

we’ve seen how he is w the other members nd melted nd seen just how closely he holds them right

he’d love just spooning esp in a bed bc soft duvet nd soft warmth nd bc he gets to wrap his arms tight around u

pulling u as close to his chest as he could

he’d rly love the feeling of having u so close bc tht way he can make sure ur a-oaky at all times u kno

anyways he’d also b rly into nuzzling into ur neck/side of ur face area

tbh he would find comfort in the smell of ur shampoo or body wash or whatever

plus it was gave him access to placing super soft kisses to ur neck/jaw/cheek

LTHOugh when he did that it would make both of u super giddy hehe

like after he did it he’d smile rly big nd hide behind u again nd maybe press a kiss to ur shoulder

but like he’d absolutely lvoe it bc u were in a relationship !!! he could do it !!! u kno

he felt pride tht no one else was able to do tht bc u were together nd awww sappi doyoung w out the actual sap :’)))

Yo if u hadn’t seen each other in a while just kNo tht u will b cuddling facing each other

it’d b way more intimate nd promotes cosy talking which he’d b all for

bc wow he loves hearing u talk nd listening to what u say

he rly values ur opinions nd words oaky

he rly appreciates getting to talk to someone other than the members

even tho he loves them lots it’s just nice knowing another person cares

plus he’d find it supppppeeeeeerrr cute seeing u look up w big eyes tht r just filled w l o v e nd it’s all 4 him!!!

He’d feel so lucky awww bless :’)’)’)

nd also if u wanted 2 lean up 2 give him a peck on the lips or cheek or smwhere

ud place ur hands on his shoulders for a lil bit of leaverAge or support or whatever

nd he’d rly like feeling ur tiny hands against his broad shoulders

((this would also apply if u were hugging while standing like he did w his baby donghyuck awww)))

nO BUT RITE DOYOUNG’S CHEST. IS . so. B R O A D

HED LOVE THE FEELING OF U SNUGGLING IN CLOSE ND SIGHIGN IN CONTENT

ITD MAKE HIM SO HAPPI LIKE THERE IS SO MUCH LVOE IM-

wow I’m making doyoung out to b a big ol sappi softy nd he is don’t get me wrong but he’s alsO 28474637272727% NOT OAKY THIS LAD IS JUST AS NASTIEE AS JAEHYUN BUT HE HIDES IT LIKE THE SNEKE HE IS

I’m gon try not go 2 hard here bc boi I don’t have time 4 these emotions!!!1!1!!

Oaky so kissing doyoung hehe I’m getting giddy as all h*ck wld most likely happen in bed at night just before slep oaky so

rite the way I imagine this goin down wld be yous 2 having ur wee chit chat u kno

#justslepythings

it’s a nightly occurrence

so anYways it’s gonna happen 1 of 2 ways

the 1st way wld b like if he’s leaning over u but not rly over u

nd there wld be a slight lull in the convo

nd ud jus b lookin @ each other bc wow beauty

nd u wld c that look like his big eyes wld b sparkly as h*ck nd u wld knoooo

so anyway he’d lean down lowkey hesitantly bc he is still r shy wee bunni but he’d do it nonetheless

nd he wld just slot ur lips together sO S O F T L Y like,

there wld hardly be any pressure

but tht wld make u want more

so ud lean up into it

tht’s how he knos he got the rite away

nd he wld lower u back down properly, ur hands going around his neck 2 bring him impossibly closer

nd then,,

out it comes.

Dotongue.

It makes n appearance.

Now lemme tell u,,

Doyoung knos e xactly what 2 do w his tongue

idk where he learnt it but dam tht thing has the ability to make u shiver in delight @ just the smallest of touches

even tho doyoung’s got quite small lips they r,,, hold up in get ing emo,,,, they’re so utterly beautiful nd so amazing @ kissing it hurts it don’t actually it’s just rly attractive nd has the ability to make u melt nd fall against/into him

nd the fact tht he’s hovering over u gives him tht lil bit o control tht he loves having nd tht u love him having hehe

bc he can just move to ur jaw nd neck @ any point

he doesn’t seem like the type to b super into hickeys but for some reason I c him having a thing for ears nd ear lobes??????

Don’t ask me y but I think nibbling gently on ur ear lobe wld be a major turn on 4 him hehehe

Oaky so the other way i c this going wld b u climbing onto his lap nd just goign 4 it

like laddddddddddd

he’d love it sm nd find it rly attractive just having u in his lap w his warm hands on ur waist //oboihishands//

but he wld also b super giggly bc c’mon it’s doyoung he is a shy wee thing it’s just surrounding his #nastieee u kno

rite so idk y but I feel doyoung wld rly like skin to skin contact

like Ik the look he gave taeil when he said he’d prefer linking arms bc more touching but nono,

this is different,

this is just u nd him

but like I think he’d rly love his hand resting on ur hip or waist or lower back just lazily trailing his hand over ur skin or gently squeezing it whenever either of u moan softly into the othertbh making out w doyoung wld b pure bliss nd I’m getting emo bc I think abt this daily whOOpS

also doyoung wld love 4 u to gently suck on his neck

like not hard enough 2 leave a mark but u kno,, tbh maybe I just wanna do this his neck,,is so h*cking beautiful I’m crine

plus by sitting on his lap ur in control of the gridningheheheheheh

He’d give those sorta lingering kisses where he’d keep leaning in nd softly pressing his lips to urs but in a really playful manner

nd it’d b super cute but he’d be shy as all heck!!!!

his Lips would b so soft nd warm u wld melt nd try to get impossibly closer to him oaky like u kno

yo his kisses,

(((esp makeouts)),

would last supppppeeeeerrrrrrrr long too,

like neither of u could get through the day without at least 45-1 hour of making out,

nd then both ur lips would b swollen as h*ck nd breathing heavily,

like makeout sessions w doyoung aren’t always gonna lead on to anything else,,,

they’re jus gonna b really nice nd enjoyable for u both

djdjdhehebsisjdbdofj

basically his aim is to get ur lips all red nd swollen from kissing

oaky he finds it supperrrr attractive ndjfhrrhdh

Yoyoyoyoyoyo tho none of the other members kno he’s this way

like the most he’ll do in front of them is hug u

nd give u those big gummie smiles we all love Sm :’)))))

nd tbh u found this more attractive nd loving bc he only shares tht side w u

nd only u kno how wildt he is in bedt nd dammmmm

I’m gonnstop bc ladS I lovE DOYOUNG SO MUCH 💖💖💖

212 notes · View notes

tumblunni · 5 years

Text

BUNNI WATCHES RANDOM OUT OF ORDER SINNOH EPISODES THAT WERE LEFT ON THIS HARD DRIVE I GUESS

Today is diamond and pearl season one episode 28 "Drifloon On The Wind!"

Huh this one had a cold open showing the climactic moment from the end of the episode before it actually happened. Thats the first time i recall the anime doing that? I thougjt initially it was a flashback and i missed the first of a two parter.

Such a cool neat weird premise! A traditional pokemon centre out in the countryside! That adds so much worldbuilding to the setting! They never state it in the english dub but it seems to be a joke on a japanese onsen? (An inn built around hot springs) the archetecture just seems to be very similar, and from what i've seen in anime the "my mum and my mum's mum and my mum's mum's mum worked here" thing is a common trope. The nurse joy family is probably a joke to exaggerate it? Also i loved the scene where Brock is like "wait what the fuck this identical nurse joy is actually old enough to have a daughter ash's age and also OH NO A WEDDING RIIIIIING" And then he thankfully,blissfully GAVE UP and we had one nurse joy centric episode without him being a fuckboi. Seriously, the older you get the less funny you find brock, it sucks that the stuff that's meant to be over the top jokes is now barely more exaggerated than how some dudes act in real life. All you real life brocks, nobody finds you as charming as a fictional goofball! You're just rude! AND REAL BROCKS DONT HAVE A CROAGUNK TO STOP THEM

Anyway i LOVE the cute cottagey aesthetic pokemon center/hotel place! It seems the family mostly treats wild pokemon in the forest and they were actually so surprised to see customers that they thought they were burglars at first! And then daww ash and co help out doing chores to pay them back for the meal and bed even though the family is like 'no dude thats the duty of a pokemon centre'. I think that was a really mature moment for ash? He realized that this pokemon center gets less business than usual ones and figured he should give them a hand. And its so nice to see him being so super excited and wowed by the chores?? Like i mean its CHORES but for him its all so new cos its learning how to work in a pokemon center. Ash's best characrer trait is how his enthusiasm really has no limits, he'll go 100% be the best choremon master ever! Or maybe he was intentionalky being all THIS IS SO FUN because the joy daughters were fighting and he wanted to help cheer them up? In a lot of ways i prefer season 1's bratty egotistical sarcasm ash just cos he had more of a visible personality and you didnt have to sorta sleuth it out like this and always be left wondering whether they really meant to write nice-Ash this way or you're just imagining it. But when nice-Ash has monents like this he's way better and i just wish it hapoened more often and was 100% confirmed, yknow? Most of the time in sinnoh he feels less like nice-ash and more like nothing-ash or changes-every-day-into-whatever-the-plot-requires-him-to-be-ash. But in sun and moon season they have all those more slice of lifey and emltional plots and he's the more nicer ash that i always wanted, and i love it!

Anyway lol im going wildly off topic. Also fun fact i spell "the" wrong so much that "tge" is the first result in my autocorrect now...

Another thing i like is that these Joys seem to be a ghost type specialist family? The kids have a big pile of drifloon cuties and when the gang first arrived they saw a bunch of happy gastlys enjoying their stay at the inn. I like to think maybe all the ghosts they have are "drifty" types like that? I feel that the writers ppicked gastly cos the pokedex entry saying they blow away on the wind like drifloon. Cos this is actually the valley windworks adaptation episode! That was such a nice surprise when it turned out momma joy's husband was the windmill electrician guy!! He looks SO cute in the anime too! He's really chubby and has such a nice round face with a button nose and big anime eyes and a cute turquoise jacket electrician uniforn thing. And he's funny and goofy with his kids and very caribg and cautious about letting them ride home alone in the bad weather, and also he's a GIANT BADASS with an ampharos that thunderpunches the shit out of team rocket and defeats them before ash can even get there lol! Actually they never show what momma joy's main pokemon is? I like to think maybe its a gengar cos thats the most chansey-ish ghost type. And also itd mean the chubby guy has a tall and thin pokemon and his tall and thin wife has a chubby pokemon. Theyre such a cute couple so itd be even cuter!

Oh and i forgot to mention that everyone travels around via drifloon??? Thats so surreal when you consider their pokedex entries saying them carrying children is a bad thing that means theyre kidnapoing them. Like, they domesticated a very dangerous pokemon and now it uses its dangerousness for the powers of good instead! Maybe its just the anime censoring a scary thing or maybe it was intentional to show how badass this momma joy is that she could tame so many spoopy ghosts that everyone thinks are pure evil? Seriously i LOVE how they show this family working to protect and heal the local wild pokemon and them all being super friendly to humans because of it. And it makes sense theyd be ghost tyoe trainers cos if youre befriending all the pokemon in a forest youre bound to find a few lost souls. Mountains and forests are like the deadliest areas for travellers so mountain forests especially so! Everyone's lucky they have this badass family team watching over the area like guardian spirits~

OH SPEAKING OF WHICH

I forgot to mention that the main conflict of the episode is that the joy sisters have a fight because the older sister is a bit overprotective and dismissive of her little sister, causing her to be reckless and get lost trying to "be grown up and help mommy". And in the end the big sister rescues her with the help of the guardian spirit of the hot springs and they reconcile their differences and have big cute hugs! Its all very well written and dramatic actually.i really felt for the older sister's determination to save her, and i felt it was a good case of a conflict where both of them were wrong and both made mistakes and it was just like they coulda avoided those mistakes if they talked it out better. And both of them had a point at the same time, yknow? So it didnt end with either of them losing the argument or anything, it was more like the lesson is just to appreciate your siblings while theyre there and also talk about your problems in clear language with younger kids instead of using excuses like "you just cant, cos im older and i said so".

Oh also SUICUNE!

The super onsen spirit is suicune?? The little sister just casually mentions her biggest best friend in the forest is suicune and is surprised when ash says its a legendary! Wow thats actually a really cool idea? You wouldnt necessarily think of it cos you kinda think of hot springs for the hot part but theyre also a sort of super clean water like how suicune is meant to be able to purify polluted lakes. Maybe it came here to make its nest cos places that are already purified are comforting to someone who wanders the earth blasting stinky water with its powers every day. I like to think maybe this is the same suicune from Generations where they said the legendary beasts are roaming legendaries because humans treated them as demons when they first walked out of the ashes, and now theyre still scared of us even centuries later. Itd be sad if they literally kept running forever, so i like to think they all have a comforting spot to sleep in, somewhere. And for suicune its this little isolated lake in the sinnoh region which used to be super far away from human civilization. But then this family's ancestors built this hospital here and suicune was initially like "oh no my house is ruined" but then it saw that these humans were helping protect tge forest pokemon too. So its like "ah fellow coworkers" and theyre the only humans it trusts. And whenever theyre in trouble it sneakily helps them and dashes away before it can be seen, but one day it got unlucky and the kids saw it and now OH NO it is stuck havibg CUTE TINY FRIENDS! I bet the littlest joy just treats suicune like a big puppy, and this great noble beast of legend plays along because it loves her so much. But if anyone else sees it demeaning itself with a game of fetch, it would be Total Social Death In The Legendaries Club

Anyway there's some cute moments of Emotionally Wise Kind Ash The Best Of All Ashes where he finds the lost little-joy and he tries to cheer her up when she's scared by the storm and keep her dry from the rain. And he has absolute faith that his friends will come to save them both! The only thing i think coukd have maybe made it better is if the big sister joy didnt beleive in suicune? Cos it just ends with her going to ask suicune for help and then suicune helps. There's a lack of tension cos you know suicune could easily resolve all this and you already know suicune is real cos the lil sis says that big sis told her to keep it a secret cos its a Big Deal and Bad People Could Take Suicune Away and stuff. Like it might have worked better if the big sis thought that little sis was just making up rumours to be all boastful, or playing with an imaginary friend. Then her going to ask suicune for help would have symbolized something, yknow? And the audience might have been tense about whether it was real or not.

But even without that added suggestion it was still a great episode! Lots of cuteness, emotionalness, familyness and a few great jokes along the way! Also i just loved them giving unique character designs and a full backstory to these minor npcs from the game. Whenever i play it now i'm totally gonna headcanon this all as true! I mean all we know about the daughter character in the game is that she says "papa youre stinky but i still love you" and that feels very in character for the slightly mischievious little sis joy that we meet in this episode. Though you only see the one daughter and she acts like she hasnt caught a drifloon yet and dreams of seeing it if you can fix the windmill problems so it'll come back. So maybe the game version takes place a little before the anime? Like, that daughter is the engineer dad's daughter from a previous relationship and the older daughter is joy's daughter from a previous relationship. And i dunno maybe lil daughter's hair colour actually is the generic npc brown from the games but she begged her momma to dye it so she could match. Like she just loves her new momma and sister so much!! And now the struggling mountain poke-center is doing better because both parents work difderent jobs now and have enough money combined to be able to keep the family in a better quality of life. And maybe the team galactic incident at the valley windworks got it a bit of publicity as a tourist destination? and after the daughter caught that drifloon everyone who visited was like GOSH ITS SO CUTIE and the dad was like "yes our special windmill attracts these pokemon that are normally only found high up on the mountains, speaking of which my wife runs an inn up there and you can go on pokemon wildlife tours to see them in their natural habitat!" And just I LOVE THESE GUYS AND I WANT THEM TO HAVE ALL THE SUCCESS IN THEIR LIFE!! There is NOTHING better than "hey we're adapting this gane what should we do?" "Add MORE FAMBLY" Like oh my god whoever had that wonderful idea should be promoted!

Thus ends bunni's disjointed review of FAMBLY EPISODE

0 notes

sorcieresque · 7 years

Text

naisy gossip from the past couple of days on: ai’s shapeshifting and the legitimacy thereof, the shape of daisy’s head, trans troubles, daisy being offended by her implied sluttiness, a detour to dick jokes, a detour from dick jokes to feelings jamming, a detour about ines’s annoyingness factor, lesbian island and clea

nickatnightwalker brief interjection: you doing okay with tweedle drunk and tweedle drunker over there?

sorcieresque Are you.

nickatnightwalker well, ive been completely cured of the siren charm probably forever

sorcieresque Good. He's not that cute either way. Tyler's a mess. It's embarrassing.

nickatnightwalker it's amazing how fast my interest in either of them dropped. like watching a rock plummet off the empire state building and then kill some passers by

nickatnightwalker anyway me and damian are going for a walk until their blood alcohol levels drop below .6. wanna come

sorcieresque I take a low res picture, fry it, and caption the rock in comic sans: My interest, the passers-by Tyler's chances of getting laid, the empire state building is captioned God. I'm not going to third wheel you. I’ll have you know I have better social skills than that.

nickatnightwalker this is an escape run daise take it or leave it

sorcieresque Fine. This doppelganger fiasco is getting boring either way.

nickatnightwalker shes not real good is she

sorcieresque No. Having a 3D mirror was fun for all about twenty minutes, which makes for better bragging rights than most people have ever had. She should be proud.

nickatnightwalker now do you get what i mean about your head being weird shaped

sorcieresque Fuck you. My head is perfectly round.

nickatnightwalker round ish

sorcieresque Your face is round-ish.

nickatnightwalker no it's not my jawline is the only good thing my dad ever gave me and you cant erase that fact

sorcieresque I could if I wanted to. Take back that my head is weird-shaped.

nickatnightwalker you cant change my face

sorcieresque I can and I shall.

nickatnightwalker cant and shant

sorcieresque Take it back.

nickatnightwalker you must have seen it though

sorcieresque I was too busy being mesmerized by the acute angles of my cheekbones.

nickatnightwalker huh you really missed an opportunity there then

sorcieresque Let a shapeshifter pour themselves into an unholy you-shaped mold and then you shall throw stones.

nickatnightwalker absolutely not hey do you think ai could even turn into me she doesnt really know what i look like

sorcieresque What do you mean.

nickatnightwalker i mean it's not like ive stripped and tap danced through the quad shes gonna get shit wrong

sorcieresque Right. I assumed that was left to her vague interpretation. It's not like she knows what the hot goods look like beneath my skirts.

nickatnightwalker kind of unsettling maybe everythings just barbie and ken under there when she turns into us

sorcieresque On a scale of one to very, how rude would it be to ask her to take her clothes off.

nickatnightwalker for you i think she would happily

sorcieresque I know. It's charming. My intentions are only pure and scientific.

nickatnightwalker that part she might not love

sorcieresque That sounds like a her-problem.

nickatnightwalker itll be a you problem if she says no

sorcieresque What if she knows how to mold us to a T.

nickatnightwalker how could she possibly

sorcieresque Magic? (Finger waving, etc.)

nickatnightwalker no, she has to know what somethign looks like to be it theres no way shes gotta just be vague nothing underneath

sorcieresque Then what's the big deal. Don't be a pussy.

nickatnightwalker well excuse me for being reluctant if the odds arent 100% against her finding out ive GOT one

sorcieresque What, did you forget you're not the only one in the world? She didn't seem to know about me.

nickatnightwalker theres a lot less to guess on with you daise

nickatnightwalker no offense but im pretty sure everyone heres seen you shirtless or close enough to to make a good approximately of nearly everything going on up there

nickatnightwalker and most of us have seen your ass too

sorcieresque That's an exaggeration, but you're welcome. There is not "less" going on with me, just different issues in the downstairs department.

nickatnightwalker no, not less, just less that people dont know about it's the public semi-nudity daise

sorcieresque You make it sound a lot worse than it is.

sorcieresque You'd think after all these years you wouldn't be so scandalized of my alleged indecency.

nickatnightwalker oh no im not but everyone else isnt hardened to it yet

sorcieresque Haha. Hardened.

nickatnightwalker i dont get it can you explain?

sorcieresque Penis Havers + Sight of Skin = Profit.

nickatnightwalker hm. yknow ive always managed it without the sight of skin part?

sorcieresque Ooh, Mr. Nick, ooh.

sorcieresque The mere sight of your melaninless face sends every phallus in a two mile radius from solid to mega solid.

nickatnightwalker you joke and yet

sorcieresque Deepthroating a banana is cheating.

nickatnightwalker no it is NOT besides thats just how i eat them

sorcieresque Perhaps you and Ines are much more similar than you'd like to believe.

nickatnightwalker please, as if she could eat a banana like i can

sorcieresque She can unhinge her jaw, Nick.

nickatnightwalker you got me there but that really seems like a sacrifice in terms of pressure and suction

sorcieresque I suddenly don't care about this.

nickatnightwalker some principles are universal daisy

sorcieresque I hardly see how unhinging your jaw would aid one outside of pleasing the mighty sword of Venus, oh Great Kahuna of Oral Sex.

nickatnightwalker itd kinda be win some lose some just because youd get greater range of motion but lose a lot of use of your lips

sorcieresque Not that this conversation isn't dripping mystery and pulsing with excitement, but are you okay.

nickatnightwalker what oh yeah he just asked if i like being human

nickatnightwalker like...idk man do i like that ive been consigned to a particularly fragile and ill-fitting meat suit? sure i guess, since the alternative was not existing at all shout out to my dads poor planning aaaaaaaay

sorcieresque Aaaay! Asking you that must count as a micro-aggression around here.

nickatnightwalker oh fuck if i know everything is a micro-aggression around here asking somebody their favorite food is a micro-aggression around here "hey whats your favorite color" "do you not know how PERSONAL colors are to me once a color murdered my entire family and now im forced to brood silently yet threateningly whenever i see it"

sorcieresque Does he like *not* being human? Respond in 2000-5000 words MLA format on your desk by tomorrow.

nickatnightwalker as a matter of fact thats exactly what i just told him

sorcieresque Twinsies.

nickatnightwalker i bet we could start telling people that tomorrow and theyd swallow it hook line and sinker

sorcieresque On that note, has Damian grown out of his sisterwife kink yet?

nickatnightwalker while i dont know what his personal feelings are on it knocking that joke out of the repertoire was part of the motherfucking bargain in exchange for letting him talk to me after hurricane daniel

sorcieresque You've always been good at haggling.

nickatnightwalker thank you you know i really, really debated putting an allowance in there for a while?

sorcieresque Ha! Perhaps not quite so good, then.

nickatnightwalker that was a trade off for my own self respect daisy

sorcieresque I suppose some of you /humans/ have that.

nickatnightwalker oh god dont even go there or i'll vanish your hair too

sorcieresque Someone's touchy.

nickatnightwalker shes just about as annoying as an asscrack full of sand

sorcieresque An asscrack full of sand and sticky hands from a rapidly melting Popsicle?

nickatnightwalker with sand glued onto your arms and legs with too-thick sunscreen scratching gently but persistently at your sunburn

sorcieresque And your sunglasses are smudged.

nickatnightwalker and your towel is too sandy to clean them on

sorcieresque And there's Sandflies.

nickatnightwalker when you shower youre gonna find dried seaweed down your bathing suit thats been there for hours

sorcieresque Like lovingly cradling Satan against your crotch. Anyway.

nickatnightwalker anyway shes real fuckin annoying

sorcieresque She's not so bad. I would have stopped around the sunglasses.

nickatnightwalker you havent seen her raging superiority complex up close and personal

sorcieresque I've seen her raging Mine Song complex.

nickatnightwalker that is one can of lesbian worms i am not gonna go anywhere the fuck near

nickatnightwalker im gonna just stay over here in my lane and not get in anywhere near anything the amazon warriors have claimed, up to and including the entire proteus dorm

sorcieresque What about /my/ problems, Nick.

nickatnightwalker cleas gotta come out, im not goin in

nickatnightwalker i dunno if you wanna take on the sapphic equivalent of the mongol horde that's your bad choice not mine

sorcieresque Well mark my death as "mysterious" on my Wikipedia page and call me sexy Genghis Khan, I'm ready.

nickatnightwalker is there anything really worth conquering over there anyway

sorcieresque Yes.

nickatnightwalker name names bitch!

sorcieresque What is this, a middle school sleepover?

nickatnightwalker yep

nickatnightwalker ive got the popcorn in the microwave now spill

sorcieresque You're subscribed to the Daily Daisy, I was under the impression that you would have an idea. Unless it's tagged Nick don't look, in which case you do not, because we respect each other's privacy.

nickatnightwalker of course i dont but i have YET to see a name drop

sorcieresque Are you asking me if there is a lucky military strategist I would particularly like to conquer?

nickatnightwalker yes imagine some clapping emojisfor me

sorcieresque You're very insistent.

nickatnightwalker well yeah

nickatnightwalker course i wanna hear whats up

sorcieresque Oh.

sorcieresque Well, no single tactician has caught my eye just yet, but I find some of the army members, how do you say, cute. Ines among them.

sorcieresque You love to joke about it, but I don't actually find Tyler's game plans all that exciting. Val's too annoying and Gabriela too dumb to strive beyond eye candy. I've caught glimpses of Clea, you know.

nickatnightwalker thats vague and intriguing keep going

sorcieresque That's all there is to say.

sorcieresque Sometimes they are there, and then they are back to being a walking kaleidoscope on steroids. I think they're cute.

nickatnightwalker they sent me a picture of them before yknow, before why can you see them?

sorcieresque I don't know. And oh. How very juicy of them.

nickatnightwalker dyou want it

sorcieresque Absolutely I do.

nickatnightwalker [it's an incredibly middle-school mirror selfie]

sorcieresque I see. Thank you for your candor.

nickatnightwalker youre welcome you and clea all straightened out? after what they said and everything i know they apologized but still

sorcieresque I made them clamber up the vine and hang from my window. It was very romantic.

nickatnightwalker oh thats so smooth im impressed of you i mean since you told them what to do

sorcieresque And isn't that a most excellent quality in a person.

nickatnightwalker obedience? generally speaking a better quality in a housepet than a person but cleas got other perks

sorcieresque Yes? And what would those be.

nickatnightwalker a fourth dimension australian accent

sorcieresque The compulsive chivalry grew on me.

nickatnightwalker it really is compulsive i swear they keep trying to stop

sorcieresque Interesting.

sorcieresque I could've sworn that was supposed to be their shtick.

nickatnightwalker i thought their shtick was quirky 90s friend

sorcieresque They contain multitudes. That's why they look like that.

nickatnightwalker well shit youre not wrong there i feel threatened by their only-sane-man and rational-human motifs though that's really kinda my thing

sorcieresque Your shtick is far more interesting than being a "rational" person.

nickatnightwalker thank you i do try to work that in though at least sometimes

sorcieresque Do you think it brings an eclectic factor to the jittery je ne sais quoi of your attractiveness?

nickatnightwalker absolutely i do i think it emphasizes that my jitteriness is not unfounded

sorcieresque Wow, you're even internally consistent.

nickatnightwalker oh yeah definitely what you see is what you get with me

sorcieresque Whatever happened to the mystery!

nickatnightwalker new school new me

sorcieresque Your transparency of character disgusts me.

nickatnightwalker oh man daise it disgusts me too

#nickatnightwalker #IM

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