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corvuscorona · 5 months

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SHADOW MONSTER - an Astos playlist

...for when you need to spend about an hour rotating that guy in your mind at top speed, or at least a little faster than chillout speed.

(YouTube playlist here) • (tracklist etc. below the cut)

Needed a playlist I could Think About Astos To while doing chores or whatever & it turned out I had the ammunition I needed to be kinda picky, so I'm sharing it here with all my comrades-in-Astos-scholarship, too! You know, in case you also need some music to Think About Astos To. Which seems possible-to-likely, I think.

I have only included tracks that are reasonably well balanced for Normal Listening (just please forgive me for the PS2 synth horns in "finish the promise" if you can find it in your heart). Also, if you use the YT playlist, Man Human is shorter than it should be, so listen to it twice if you want.

ACT I: IMPETUS

Creep City • Jake Shears I said I'd hang on for the ride / now I'm hanging on for dear life / …is that a real knife? バケモノ信者 (Bakemono Shinja / Monster Believer) • MAIKI-P 人の顔した　バケモノさ / 気づけば僕も　バケモノさ • hito no kao shita bakemono sa / kizukeba boku mo bakemono sa it's a monster with a human face / and now that I think about it, I'm a monster, too 心臓 (Shinzō / Heart[1]) • TOOBOE 蘇ってしまうよ　貴方の為なら幾らでも / 間違いも愛せるよ　馬鹿なもんでさ / 生き返ってしまうよ　貴方がくれた命だから • yomigaette shimau yo anata no tame nara ikura demo / machigai mo aiseru yo baka na monde sa / ikikaette shimau yo anata ga kureta inochidakara for you, I'd revive again and again / loving even the mistakes, fool that I am / I'll come back to life because it's the life you gave me

ACT II: THE PROCESS

Bleed it Out • Linkin Park half the words don't mean a thing / and I know that I won't be satisfied Man Human • Denki Groove for Devilman Crybaby Just One Yesterday • Fall Out Boy I want to teach you a lesson in the worst kind of way / still, I'd trade all my tomorrows…

ACT III: MADNESS

Décolleté • Kenshi Yonezu 兎角疲れました / 数えるから直ぐに消えて • tokaku tsukaremashita / kazoeru kara sugu ni kiete at any rate, I'm exhausted / I'll count, so hurry up and disappear [2] うみなおし (Uminaoshi / Rebirth[3]) • Maretu 君は何も悪くないぜ / (多分) • kimi wa nani mo warukunai ze / (tabun) you've done nothing wrong / (probably) 空想メソロギヰ (Kuusou Mesorogiwi / Fantastical Mesology) • Yousei Teikoku for Future Diary (See [4] below.)

ACT IV: FOR WHAT

A Good Song Never Dies • Saint Motel it just reminds you of where you were / the first time it made you cry / the first time you felt alive… SHADOW MONSTER • Toki Asako 探しものは踊らなきゃ見つからない • sagashimono wa odoranakya mitsukaranai if we don't dance, we won't find what we're looking for.

ACT V: RESOLVE

JUMPER • CAPSULE anger stress and secrets they won't break you wake up put aside you(')r(e) feeling nothing freely speed up landing stepping jumping jump Leave The Light On • Overcoats what if I don't make it home / you're not there, and the light's not on

ACT VI: THE END

still feel. • half•alive when it's hopeless, I start to notice / that I still feel alive finish the promise • MOTOO FUJIWARA for Tales of the Abyss White Light • Superfly for Tales of Zestiria 正解なんてない間違いなんてない / 塗り替えてゆけ在るべき世界へ • seikai nante nai machigai nante nai / nurikaete yuke arubeki sekai e there's no such thing as right; there's no such thing as wrong / remake this world into what it should have been

( NOTES )

[1] - Specifically the anatomical term. Metaphorical uses of this word do seem to be a thing, but skew more towards meaning something like "courage" (think "guts" or "spine") as opposed to 心 (kokoro) on its own, which is used for something more like "essence", "spirit", "soul". Incidentally, I highly… HIGHLY recommend watching the MV for this one (Check the YT link before the readmore)! [2] - Eternal plug for vgperson, who has been my source for Kenshi Yonezu lyrics since something like 2010, and is the backbone of society. Check out the full translation there (ctrl+F the title!) to get a feel for this song's whole... vibe (which I'd describe as a very specific flavor of "fuck. god damn it. whatever; leave me alone," which of course is why it's here). [3] - There's a footnote on the Vocaloid Lyrics Wiki page for this song that conveys something interesting about the title; it says: "'Uminaoshi' isn’t a word that’s typically used to mean 'rebirth'; rather, it is a compound made up of a word meaning 'to give birth' and a word that carries the sense of doing something over to fix mistakes, because you messed it up the last time," which is fun, I think. [4] - This song's lyrics are poetic in a way that makes them difficult to interpret as-written, let alone translate in a way that makes literally any sense at all. The official MV does have English subtitles that are NOT auto-translated, though. Those are the most coherent piece of information I can give you (check the YT link before the readmore!) re: why the Future Diary OP is even in this playlist, except for this statement: it's about breaking free of a time loop that's being treated like a game in some way by The Entity In Charge Of It. (And also, it sounds like... you know, like the way that it sounds.)

#stranger of paradise #stranger of paradise final fantasy origin #sopffo #hi everybody I'm going to go write fic now I just had to get this OUT of my drafts and into your ears first. thank you I love you bye #EDIT: my wife (immediately): 'what kind of play has six acts' listen is there a better way to separate a chunk into smaller chunks #which I think u should eat in order? NO? didn't think so.

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uniasus · 1 year

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As much as Capsule Monsters is a plotblock preventing me from finally watching Millennium World, it's actually really nice to see how Yugi and Yami work together in this arc. It's Yugi telling Yami what do, Yugi coming up with solutions, and it's Yugi telling Yami to take a gamble that - ultimately - Yami takes.

As much as I ship these two, I do feel, sadly, the show rarely treats them as equals and so I latch onto moments where they're true partners or Yugi gets to shine on his own. The duel against Pegasus. Yugi's duel with a possessed Joey. That moment against Gangsey where Yugi steals control of their body to give Yami a break. Yugi whipping out Timaeus while in the middle of a wind funnel to beat back Leviatian early on in the DOMA arch.

And I get it - Yugi has confidence issues and the dude knows it. It's why he was so insistent on dueling Joey, to prove he can do it. But then he does do it and gets immediately shuffled aside, Yami taking center stage so completely Yami ignores Yugi's opinions.

And now here's Yami listening. Praising Yugi's ability to figure out riddles, even as Yami's getting strangled or staring down crush walls. Could Yami figure out these riddles on his own? Eventually, probably. But it's so nice to see Grandpa reading the riddles, Tristian and Joey yelling at Yugi/Yami for their self-sacrificing tendencies, Yami taking the physical risks while Yugi thinks the puzzles through, and Tea able to support the team mentally and physically for a change.

It's all pure fluff I'm still ranging at because I'm tired of filler and oh no the battles can really injure them! is beyond done at this point. But still. Objectively I can appreciate it but.

But god do I want to meet Atem properly. I started watching this show in April.

#yugioh #ygo meta #puzzleshipping #yami yugi #yugi muto

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tinyfoxpolice · 2 months

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10:51 - Monday 4th March 2024

Dear Tobi (this actually for Taylor Swift but I'm pretending it's you because I don't actually know Tay Tay so giving advice to her is harder than it would be to give it to you)

I spoke to you in my last letter about writing as many pages of diary entries in big capital letters and pressing the pen down so hard you rip the pages, but today I'm thinking about what I would tell you if you made some form of a love letter to a person who didn't love you.

Love is a very funny thing. When you are in love you see only the good and potential in a person, even when they aren't good and don't have potential. You will probably find in your lifetime that you might unknowingly hold people up to idealistic standards and what you are looking at that makes you feel so deeply for that person is that they are in fact a mirror of your own reflection.

It sounds lovely, but it's a tricky concept to come to terms with. A mirror being held up that is reflecting yourself and you've fallen so hard in love you can't breath, it sounds like a form of narcissism. But Tobi, it's not narcissism because you are that beautiful.

When people hold mirrors up to us and reflect ourselves they are trying to force you onto your knees so you can look at your reflection and see the monster you've become. They do it deliberately. They want to see you hurting, they want to see your pain, they want to see your suffering. All of it is designed by them to take away a key component of you so you never have that part again.

So what would I tell you if you dedicated songs, letters, a life to a person who was nothing but a mirror of you? Somebody who hurt you so deeply you feel ashamed to even look backwards on the art you made for them because it's now marked with red paint. Do you make art about the hurt? Do you make art about the suffering? Do you make art about all the parts of you that were taken away?

You can if that's what you want to do. You can make as much as you want until it feels better. You can write as many angry letters as you need to. I encourage you to do those things, make that sort of art and express yourself because this is your life, these are your artworks, this is your stamp on the world.

I've found in my experience that holding onto the anger and hurt doesn't make it go away. Eventually the hurt and anger turns to guilt and shame. You look at the art you made and feel guilty and shameful that those sorts of creations exist because they now look ugly. But they aren't.

Ugly artwork is only ugly to the eye of the beholder. That's what these sorts of people do, they change the way you view the world. They turn it to chaos, destruction and your ultimate demise. They want you to view the world as ugly.

So when you're stuck, go back in time. Look at those pieces of art you made and remember the memories that surrounded it. Did you have a friend who came over in that period of time who told you that you were the most talented creature on this planet with what you made? Sure that art piece might've been made for your muse, but can you dedicate the artwork to somebody else? What parts of the world did you incorporate that wasn't that person? What beautiful things did you put into that time capsule?

Take those beautiful things from those moments in time and put them back into those pieces. A kaleidoscope painting with a red splash down the middle? Outline the splash to acknowledge its existence, then step by step turn that red colour into new shades. Adding blue to red makes purple :)

So take your sadness, take your anger and start painting again to turn that red splash into a new colour and reclaim what was destroyed. You can only see other colours when you acknowledge that blue and red exist and are primary colours that make up the entire spectrum of every other colour in existence. You need the red. You need the blue. And you need the yellow.

Purple, Orange, Green, Happy, Sad, Angry, White, Black, Forgiveness, Sin.

Red and White makes Pink. Anger and Forgiveness means you get the opportunity to feel love.

Don't worry so much about what other people think, they will talk regardless. That's what fans do. Your biggest fans on earth are the people who despise you the most and keep you relevant by keeping your name on their lips and spreading it to everybody who listens.

In a world devoid of colour you'll need to smash the snow globe and get blood on your hands to see the kaleidoscope. It's fucking absolutely dogshit to go through, your hands have all these cuts, there is blood all over the floor, glass shards everywhere, the contents of the snowglobe are scattered along the floor and you realised you were glued in place the entire time while the world spun around you. Trust me. It will be worth it in the end to see new colours.

(and if it's not worth it just start planking on things. Just be depresso and plank on whatever you find to make a memory because life is misery. How can anybody be sad when they're on the lookout constantly to find something to lay on and take a picture of? Exactly. You can't be sad.)

You will be okay. Add colour back into the picture to make new colours and create something entirely new. Just don't ever let anybody take the core of you out so they hold onto it forever. Be lame. Be cringe. Be in love. Hate people. Love people. Be everything everybody doesn't want. Be too much. Dress however you want (but I will have questions). Dye your hair. Get piercings. Do whatever it is you want to do but all I ask is that you don't become an Ed Sheeran fan. Please. I will have to write you out of the will and it will be devastating for me to do that.

Don't let people take yourself from you. I posted the most batshit insane things on the internet and if I can live with that chaotic version of myself then so can you. Be chaotic and insane and villainous, I will ALWAYS be on your side. Make crazy artwork that frightens people because it's so scary. I will frame it. Make artwork that is disgustingly in love and makes people want to vomit. I will frame it. Make the most generic artwork that is neither good nor bad. I probably won't frame it but I'll make it into coasters. Just create, okay.

And Taylor, I will always punch on with Karlie Kloss for you. I don't give a shit. I will tell her she's a grub to her face and then spit on her shoes, take my shirt off and start punching on with a trashcan. What's she gonna fucking do? I'll find Joe and put an accent on and be a chav who harasses him on the street asking for a ciggy. I'll tell him hes a dawg. I'll start a fist fight. I don't give a fuck about no blonde man with blue eyes. Been there, done that and I'll fucking fight the cunts. Give em the left, right, goodnight off the books kind of business.

This is my fight club. I make the rules.

I love you Bubbi xxx

11:29 - MAKE A SONG CALLED KING CHARLES. ITS KARLIE TURNED TO CARLYLE WHICH GOT CHANGED TO CHARLES AND KLOSS TURNED TO KING. THEN I SWITCHED IT AROUND FOR IT TO BE KING CHARLES.

Nobody will ever guess that it's about Karlie Kloss

11:30 - then everyone will think you have the hots for King Charles and you will create beef within the royal family and overthrow the monarchy

11:31 - I believe you're the only person capable of taking the whites down.

11:31 - if we work together we can become the new royal family and call it Scrappy Dog Gang and we make a new currency up and print our faces on either side.

11:32 - I believe in you. Take the monarchy down. Forget about Joe. Forget about Karlie. Think about how good it would feel to overthrow the monarchy

11:33 - King of my Heart? London Boy? It's giving King Charles love affair

11:34 - Gorgeous? I know you been seeing the King on the side to infiltrate

11:34 - Anti-Hero? You're not fooling anybody

11:35 - Miss Americana and the Heartbreak PRINCE. so Will is in this as well? What about Kate? What about their children? How could you do that

11:36 - False God? So now you're questioning Christianity?

11:36 - Soon you'll get better? You knew King Charles had cancer? I can't believe the Easter eggs you've left behind here

11:37 - Dress? The dig at Kate....brutal

11:38 - Youve been on Meghan Markles side this whole time

11:38 - This is why we can't have nice things? So you're taking Camilla on too???? You're fucking wild

11:39 - You said "Princess Di, I'ma do what you never could"

11:40 - Call it what you want? Okay babes I think it's called anarchy

11:40 - Getaway Car? Jesus Christ, the monarchy can't see what I can

11:40 - my girly is about to become queen and overthrow the monarchy and everybody is fucking blind to her plan this whole time. They thought she was in love but she was just seeing Joe to get dirt on the royal family and infiltrate from the inside

11:41 - good for her. As she should. Queen behaviour.

11:42 - sorry about the cancer joke, I meant no harm about your mum. Peace love and respect always

11:43 - THE LAST GREAT AMERICAN DYNASTY. THE CLUES HAVE BEEN THERE THIS WHOLE TIME.

11:43 - Make a new song for rep album and call it Monarchy

11:43 - Where you make out it was a ploy this entire time. Then a song called Anarchy

11:44 - What nobody else sees is that it's actually a slam dunk on Karlie Kloss with a massive inside joke she isn't apart of

11:44 - LMAOOOOO SUCK MY DICK KARLIE

11:45 - make a song and call it Charles and Camilla

11:45 - I'm joking. They will put a hit man out for you

11:46 - Princess Dianna

11:46 - Folklore about the royals

11:46 -

Monarchy

The Royal Family

Stolen Jewels

Anarchy

11:47 - I mean it fits with the plot of the Kanye drama

11:47 - there could be something here to change the storyline

11:48 - The Daily News could be a good song

11:49 - Princess Di faced the same problem of always having the daily news surrounding her

11:49

Monarchy

The Royal Family

Stolen Jewels

The Daily News

Anarchy

11:50 - you could essentially write about what happened while have it hidden under the guise of scooter Braun and Kanye.

11:51 - the thing is how to tie it back in to love

11:51 - well it's the last album for the rerecordings

11:51 - NO BITCH. SHE ENDS WITH TAYLOR SWIFT

11:52 - SHE CAN ADD FIVE NEW SONGS FOR THE VAULT TRACKS FOR ACCEPTANCE IN THOSE ONES WHICH LINKS IT BACK TO LOVER

11:52 - I have to go meet up with Nikki at the zoo for coffee. But I'll be back....I always come back

Tay Tay, I give you permission to use my ideas

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a-moth-to-the-light · 7 months

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Comeback Celebration: Current Top 10 TXT Songs

I was planning to release this the day the album came out! But then life did a life and I didn't; but now life, out of spite, is doing even MORE of a life, so I'm running away from my problems for an hour or so to talk about some nice songs that bring me joy!

1. Dear Sputnik

Dancing around my living room to this one will never get old! But I do feel like this is a weird choice, since I think if you asked me on-the-spot what my favorite TXT songs are, "Dear Sputnik" wouldn't even come up in the conversation. I guess I've never really adjusted to edgier TXT--like, I can't truly process that the "Our Summer" guys also released "Frost"--so most of the time I just forget that their darker stuff is actually theirs. But I really do love this song, which I realized more and more over the week-ish process of making this list. There's something so... guttural?... about it that makes it a real standout--it just gets better, and more thrilling, the more closely I listen to it.

2. Crown

I actually don't listen to this one all that much--definitely less than anything else on this list--but that's because it's such a perfect time capsule, dragging me back completely to a set of memories that I just can't emotionally handle revisiting very often. (I swear, most days just hearing those little beep things could make me cry.) And I can't not admire it for that, for just how immersive the listening experience is. Also, it's basically a perfect song--even through my tears, I can see that!

3. Our Summer

Same thoughts as "Crown", but I find revisiting "Our Summer" slightly less soul-crushing--if that's better or worse, I'll let you decide! Anyways, brushing the sudden flood of 2019/2020-era memories aside, the vocal layering here really suits them!

4. Ghosting

Yeah, I loved this comeback (see: the honorable mentions). I love how silky-smooth "Ghosting" in particular sounds, even though, when I listen more closely, there are SO many different textures playing against each other, all carefully placed to create a super-cohesive, but still interesting, listening experience--it really feels like a lot of care went into this one, and I think that's what makes it such a cozy classic for me. Plus, I just love shiny-sounding guitar!

5. Magic

A carbonated drink in song form. I'll admit, I don't know exactly how or why I love "Magic" so much, but here we are! (Which is exactly how I feel about sparkling water, come to think of it?)

6. I Know I Love You

Road trip anthem!! I probably wouldn't be nearly as attached to this one if that chorus wasn't absolutely EVERYWHERE on the internet in 2021, but, you know, it's not a bad chorus to have ringing in your head 24/7, either.

7. Can't We Just Leave the Monster Alive

My embarrassing affection for tropical house has become a recurring bit on this blog now, I guess. Well, here's another tropical house track I'm still not over! (Just you wait for my Chung Ha top ten list...)

8. Drama

I like the nice piano sounds!! They make my soul happy, like hugging a stuffed animal or eating crunchy things :) Oh, I guess the rest of the song has nice energy, too! But I'm mostly here for the piano, sorry...

9. Farewell, Neverland

I really underestimated this song--at first, I was just okay with it, thinking it was pleasant and sort of catchy, a song that's not bad to leave on loop for a while, but there are great production choices all over the place (the PERCUSSION.) that have given it a lot of longevity for me.

10. Everlasting Shine

Every single chorus in this one is Awesome and makes me Very Sad. The vocal performances here are real standouts!

Honorable Mentions: Fairy of Shampoo, the blue hour album cover (no not the song just the album cover), Wishlist, Way Home, Anti-Romantic, Good Boy Gone Bad, Thursday's Child Has Far To Go

#blue orangeade should probably be on here somewhere #i'm WAYYY too mean to it #oh also happily ever after is my favorite from the new album rn!#i like the txt version of back for more a LOT too #comeback celebration!#artist top ten #txt

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the-firebird69 · 2 years

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Watch "Van Halen Mean Street" on YouTube

youtube

It's not controlling our cage you either and it is okay too and he sees what we mean and it's a heads up for them so they're getting ready and they are getting ready anyways but we see it and we get a little fight with Godzilla and we've done it before

Zig Zag

This boy this is great in Japan was like that try and get like a turtleneck or something LOL but for real we control the Godzilla monsters male and female they're both named the same thing apparently it's like thousands of years. Sure algae stuff it's really NyQuil. So is that lobby as I was really for me but. You would he goes against one let me take a Nicole in the first place so that's a huge deal what's happening because she's going to go out there and have them in Japan will be mad cuz they have to go there to try and it is a pain because it's not right they come out with full blown Godzilla but they're more or less partially hers and it's not really true she's still kind of smaller and get some capsulated but she can control the monster and she's wondering how and she somehow connected so it's going on too and it is a monster and it is Godzilla and it does possessed people and it comes out in Japan afterwards and the text Jason who is invading their house trying to capture her and he got beat up in the monster escaped and after the shelf fell over Jason collapsed this place back to you back in and audioslave begins because Godzilla goes on a rampage for about a week and a half

Posiden and Goddess Wife

It's a horrible job he has and the rain has stopped and we're happy about it and the mouth of Godzilla is right up at the park and there are quite a few people up there now that this hardly any that go there it's ridiculous cuz it's right there but he says they're going to start going there shortly once the harbor drops and it will drop shortly I'm probably in the next day or two it is right that's going to be tons of fishing and less rain but we need some more

Zig Zag

We're meeting her we're meteoring it just like it needs metering it and it is correct to say it right and it's having trouble pronouncing things as little tired and talking all day this is a huge job that he's done and he's helping us you show us what his job is kind of a lot less worried he came off as kind of a tyrant I see why though these people are dangerous okay humans are dangerous that are wrong and we're recruiting like madness and it's going to go through the roof pretty soon because he's given the order and she has it's going to be awesome I'm going to see that thing it's going to be over with the monster I'm like well now it's going to be different it's really really really special

Thor Freya

It's not only a special but it's full of almost One race so people have to understand that when you do that it attracts attention and our father and mother do and they're happy about it and we say we have to help them and Uriel and got his wife will and Poseidon and got his wife have already devoted troops to it and ships they're going to have a full complement it's from the upper Midwest and they're going to launch a bunch of them tonight you have to be up there first

Zig Zag

The laser is from the giant diamonds that they plan on building would have some effect on giant ships but it wouldn't take it down in time only if they had a bunch and they don't plan to do it that way they say

Thor Freya

They're probably lying

Zues Hera

You little s*** what are you doing I don't know he says I'm watching a big ship so I'm laughing this things are enormous this is a lot bigger than you think in the middle is like 4,000 miles deep so I think I'll crap my pants now

Mac

If they were real we would say that they are 100 times the volume of your 11,000 mile 3 to 400 wide Stone ship and it's because it's 4,000 miles wide not 400

Thor Freya

He teehe no I didn't say it wrong and he doesn't want to say right and we're making them oh God gross

Hera

I'm going to get me some power I need that NZ out and I need it up and it's our family stuff

Zues

Jesus shit ok

Hera

Lol

Zues

Savage oppress we move on it now and we're going to remove him it's going to back out of there too he's really big but she's bigger most of the time

What the hell I'm the goofball doing that I'm a huge man

Zig

What are you doing down there doing a Rubik's cube

Kraken

No no he won't do that to me that's not what he's doing I can't see it what it is he said it's a bubble and it's probably one of their devices but not a bomb he says that's true what could it be I'm worm maybe machine

Female Kraken

So you're saying that he's looking at one of our war machines that's going after shehalude and so forth so wondering where you got it said well you know it's probably digging stuff up or the thing came out to look at him or her that is and she spotted it not sure I haven't seen it I don't I don't know I haven't looked so he said that and I don't know how he's looking or ask he says I don't want to do that but okay

Mac

It's a bottle and I know what it is it's not a warm machine it might be something worse like a small pack of Mac but we've seen them before and then they're great but not that great she says I'm easily distracted the tour by her side ignoring me when I was rolling an eye around and look okay but that's going to be our job down there I know why I put up with it for a long time I got a pain in the ass the launching things from out there the whole time this is worries out there too it was a huge iron ore deposit I want to use it to sit there either one amount in Utah to try and go after us somewhere out there they probably have specific targets so we got some worries but really I don't know what I'm feeling with and we're not fooling around out there we just go and rip it open but okay she's talking to him about it you say it's not us right now

Zig

I'm okay we understand what's going on we're getting alerts

Ziggy

Yeah yeah it's up in my monitor it says just calm down we'll handle it and I say I'm involved with it will help what I can and assist if you need it so call if you need it and Godspeed and thank you very much and I mean it

Stardust

Well I guess I'll have to take over that casino and zig zag may make that possible but I haven't totally rebuild it

Savage

Ground up ok that's the terminology we learned when we were little

Oppress

This creatures and kids everywhere of theirs and we don't know anything it's cuz he is idiots another finished in their areas you have to finish them in ours it's the best part dessert

Mac Daddy

We do this now

Mike tew

I'm up on it see it are using it all on them now hv to no more time

Daniel

We needed this to use it they suck. He's a trooper held out for a while they said I can't handle anymore I guess stop blabbing and look at them and really I need to do something and they won't do anything he goes 1%. Because he was a piece of poop in a freaking puddle and I make those up too but for real though you said it to him had a surgery or bad history went sour a criminals the real ones and I started to think about it they're probably drags and they're with him too long and got sucked down like Tommy f and they said yeah probably I see him in combat and not really into it and start getting fired up and they see them they get far too aggressive so they're our friends and we should probably try and protect them and I've seen the reaction he has he can't stand them I have that reaction f*** you fat b**** where are you la shortly we'll see about that

Bob m

No I hope you understand we're having a lot of trouble with these idiots right now so I'm raising them ours up and we fired them and that's a good thing to say and they got fired by Tommy f was trying to use them against us right now

Mac two fruition he says and he doesn't care about our friends cage you and we say you will you moron

#Youtube

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dourpeep · 3 years

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WAIT. I'm losing my mind over that friends to lovers post you reblogged. All I can think about is college Albedo + mutual pining, romantic tension, and friends to lovers OTL

- Leaving little post it notes in his bag or inside the cover of his textbook to tell him to have a nice day or remind him to take care of himself because you know he has a tendency to work too hard sometimes!! And what if he meets up with Sucrose and Timaeus because they like to catch up and sometimes discuss their research or homework, and they see Albedo hiding a grin behind his books and think that he's solved a particularly difficult problem but it's just a cute little note you slipped him when he wasn't looking

- You stay up studying for exams with Albedo and he dozes off on your shoulder so you sit there afraid to move because you don't want to wake him but you're also dying inside

- The two of you go to the library to work but eventually get distracted so it turns into the two you sitting close together on a couch and reading each other sections from your favourite books

- I can also see him as someone who rambles about labs or new research he's absolutely taken by. Weeks later when you mention something he said before, he's a little surprised but you just tell him that you tried your best to understand everything because you know it's important to him and maybe his heart skipped a little

- Going off your headcanons: Albedo looking for little specimens and deciding it could be a fun outing with Klee so she can get some sunshine and you find the two of them in the park. You end up joining them and Albedo's heart softens seeing you and Klee laughing and smiling together!

- I remember this little headcanon you had where he snorts when laughing sometimes and imagine Albedo letting one slip out while he's with you, and Kaeya teasing him later on.

- Eventually, his friends start asking if the two of you are together because of the silent affection and teasing between the two of you. Albedo knows he likes you but he's scared a relationship will ruin everything and you're too important to lose even if it means he never says anything, but little did he know, you have feelings for him too.

Anyway, I hope you have a nice day and week! Sorry about this monster of an ask lmao

NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR ALBEDO

NEVER

Like... there are two characters that I seldom, if ever, turn down and that's my beloved Albedo and beloathed Scaramouche- If you don't want me to shut up about a topic??? Like just utter word vomit???? Bring them up. Bring them up, I dare you--

Okay okay okay okay now lemme just--

oops. 1.4k words. Enjoy your headcanon drabbles, courtesy of me being a hard simp for Albedo--

College au Albedo is pretty close to how he normally is! Brilliant, though having difficulties with making friends and keeping said friends, getting carried away with experiments (did you know if you're on good enough terms with the professors, they'll vouch for you so you can use the lab when there aren't classes using them?? Yeah)...so the friendship that you have with him is certainly the closest one he has.

It'd be the kind where you knock on his dorm or apartment door at 11:45pm with some takeout and your textbooks and he'll let you in without a second thought. You slip inside and settle on the floor next to the coffee table cross-legged, setting the food out as if you don't live a good walk away. He wasn't going to sleep any time soon anyway.

Like the kind of friendship where your hand instinctively slips into his to tug him towards something cool you found or to the café where you tend to go after classes.

Even after you get to your destination, you don't let go.

Now that that has been established--the little notes you slip into his bag or on his books really began as a little reminder. Despite his keen intellect, Albedo tends to easily forget things because his mind is always going onto the next thing. So, being the great friend you are, would just slip a note to remind him to take breaks, eat a snack, or that you're supposed to go and meet Sucrose and Timaeus after class to prep for the upcoming exams.

Neither of you really know when they began to turn into doodles or 'seemingly platonic declarations of adoration'. It's normal for friends to write a heart besides "Don't forget I love you!", right? Yeah.

The smile that makes it's way on Albedo's face is unmistakable the moment that Sucrose accidentally stumbles upon a sticky note carefully tucked in one of his notebooks.

Speaking of Albedo and his tendencies to get carried away with stuff, he often functions on...minimal sleep.

Those nights that you pop up at his place to study or just hang out, he often ends up dozing off, glasses sliding uncomfortably down the bridge of his nose and hair tousled out of it's usual style.

You never plan to stay the night (though even when he's awake he insists you do because it's not as safe at night to make the commute home), but you can't just disturb his sleep when it's the first time in a while that he's probably gone without taking a capsule or two of melatonin to help himself back into some semblance of a sleep schedule.

It's these moments that you remember just how soft his hair is and just how nice his shampoo smells.

Also that he's a cuddler.

You awake in the morning, back aching and eyes squinting against the sudden brightness of the world around you and limbs tangled with your best friend. He's unbothered because his face is half-shoved against the crook of your neck.

With the library, you often find yourselves in a little game. There's so much to learn and so, so many topics through the old vanilla-scent found between pages!!

So trips to the library end up with the two of you digging and sifting to find a topic you've never heard of, sit and read for 15 minutes, then proceed to explain said topic the best you can (without looking!!). It almost always ends up with a few chuckles from Albedo as you fumble explaining (and half-making up) information and Albedo's (unfairly) great short-term memory winning out.

Speaking of...between actually studying and your little topic games, Albedo turns to you to bounce off his current observations and ideas. Sucrose and Timaeus, though both in similar majors as Albedo, are busy with their own projects and research to the point that they don't really have the time to help with stuff as extensive as his research.

Annnnd, naturally, since you don't have anything better to do and are almost always by his side, you play that part!

You listen intently no matter how dense the subject may be and no matter if you do or do not have the background knowledge.

When you ask him to explain something you don't quite understand, he can't help but blink in surprise because you were listening??? And wanted to really understand? You prove time and time again (even days, weeks later) that you listened to every word that tumbled out during his rambles.

And of course you do! Albedo's one of the most important people to you, so it's only natural that you want to show interest in his interests.

Also it's pretty cool to find out those random bits of trivia (like lobsters and their repairable telomeres-).

Klee!!!

Oh man, the first time that you met Klee was a pretty hectic day for Albedo. Due to his Aunt Alice's incredibly busy schedule, he tends to care for Klee on days that he doesn't have class.

However, that particular day he just barely finished class before he had to go and pick her up from school.

With you in tow, that is.

Immediately, the little girl brightens up at your presence, no doubt excited from what she's heard about you (listening in to Albedo's conversations with Alice and the embarrassed tone in his voice when he realizes that he's let your name slipped again and now Aunt Alice wants to know about this particular friend who's captured dear little Bedo's attentions). He's relieved when Klee doesn't immediately reveal that.

From then on, Klee insists that Albedo invites you for every outing they have.

The cafe for a quick treat? The bookstore to sit and read a few books?

"Oh, please please please?? Can they come Albedo? Klee promises that she'll be good!"

Who is he to say no?

But above all, those park days are his favorite. You end up running around with Klee, lifting her up so she can reach a particular leaf on a branch, squatting down to see a bug or lizard that she's entirely enthralled by--all while Albedo sits under the shade of a tree on a blanket, sketchbook and pencil in hand.

You don't know it (even though there's many occasions where he's shown you his sketchbook), but the pages are filled with your smile.

Around you, Albedo's found that he's most comfortable.

There's no need to hide insecurities or hold his tongue when something particularly exciting comes to mind...nor does he hold back in his laughter. Especially with your insistence that his laugh is cute.

That scenario with Kaeya is entirely an accident, proof of just how used to your presence he's become.

It's a late night and you're out with a bigger group of friends than usual, some friends that Albedo's only known since the start of college, but definitely good ones.

With a drink in your hand you all sit at a large table, chatting about anything and everything when you crack a joke and Albedo snorts.

Not like a snort with his normally quiet chuckle, either.

Instead, he's laughing hard, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes and stomach hurting (and maybe it's because of the few sips of drink he's had) and he snorts. The moment the sound escapes him and he's trying hard to calm back down, Kaeya grins.

He's most definitely one of the first people to put two and two together.

After all, Albedo keeps to himself, even around them. But with you around? There's a certain spark of life that ignites.

It's no surprise that the two of you are close when all is said and done.

But that doesn't stop either of you from choking and cheeks from flushing when someone asks if you're a couple. It happens often--too often to count--and ranges between Kaeya's teasing comments and a few sweet words from an elderly woman passing by your table at the cafe.

And you laugh--you and Albedo--because no, no, you're just friends.

Right?

Then the light hits your features just right, illuminating you in a soft glow that makes your eyes shine and--

It's undeniable the way that he feels for you. The sudden quickening of his heartbeat is proof enough. You slide your drink towards him for him to try and he does the same, eyes unable to leave your lips as you take a sip and then smile.

Between the cracks of his appreciation, of this warmth, dread seeps.

Though...that was just over a week ago.

Sitting down back at his apartment, your head resting on his chest and your hands intertwined while you watch whatever's on tv, you shift. Your lips meet in a sweet kiss.

And Albedo wonders how neither of you managed to see it sooner.

#anon asks #THE FACT THAT YOU REMEMBER MY ALBEDO HEADCANONS AND STUFF MY HEARTTT #albedo x reader #genshin impact albedo #genshin impact x reader #albedo headcanons #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact drabbles #modern au #college au #modern au albedo

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chiwhorei · 3 years

Text

𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐯𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐮𝐞𝐬

paring: kenny ackerman x fem!reader

genre: apocalypse!au, smut, dark content, 18+ mdni [cross-posted to Ao3]

word count: 3k

overview: kenny *i-wouldn’t-fuck-you-if-it-was-the-end-of-the-world* ackerman; but it is and you do . . . and you’ll probably do it again. or, if you read beyond the cut and wind up in hell that is legally not my fault.

tags: dymph does sacrilege once again, post-apocalypse au, blood, violence, zombies (only mentions of gore nothing specific), somnophilia, noncon, dubcon, degradation, smoking, insertion, sloppy oral, big age gap aka kenny is a nasty old man and reader is a sweet little virgin.

a.notes: happy *fucking* easter. this is for the smut pile’s apocalypse collab so go give everyone’s pieces a read, everyone has worked so incredibly hard. this is dedicated to @pleasantanathema, who was both my beta reader and emotional support while stringing this together. here’s to the old man fuckery, cheers.

hymn: the seven deadly virtues - camelot

But stay awake at all times, praying that you may have strength to escape all these things that are going to take place, and to stand before the Son of Man. -Luke 21:36

* * *

Wet.

A sticky kind of wet. Clinging on like thick clay, splattered across your neck— gore and sinew wrapped in a noose. Shades of decaying reds and browns are all you see these days.

The seeping, molding kind of wet.

The smell is suffocating, the toll of death deep in your bones. You keep moving, you have to. One foot in front of the other, fingers fretting with the cross hanging between your collarbones. Counting your Hail Mary’s distracts from the ache in your soles and the burning feeling that you’re rotting away.

It was slow at first. The end of the world, the crashing, clattering end felt like a slow decent to hell. Pieces of the modern world falling away, the promise of tomorrow, the assurance of a cure. You refused to believe the dead could walk the earth until they were stumbling straight towards you.

All of us, you think, are rotting away.

“Pick up the pace, kid. Are you trying to end up like the rest of those fuckers?” His voice rings from a few feet in front of you. The brush under your feet is dry, leaves crunching loudly with every weary step forward.

Kenny always likes to remind you of your naïveté, insults about your rose tinted glasses barked crudely from around a cigarette. Your youth, your optimism, your beliefs-- useless traits in his opinion. What good is God in a world like this.

“Friends. They were our friends.” Your words come out in a whimper, the tone further irritating the man ahead of you.

He stops, turning around to catch your eyes, gaze piercing through the night like a knife. All that’s left of your composure is used to keep from crashing right into his chest.

“Ain’t no more room for friends in this world, baby doll,” a long pointer finger lifts your chin, the slightest touch still bruising, “thinkin’ like that is what’s going to get ya killed.”

Rose tinted glasses, cracked and splattered with blood, fall off and are lost to a world that no longer exists. Kenny let’s up and turns, pulling you farther into the thick brush. You could swear you feel the lenses as they splinter under your shoe.

* * *

Kenny is a vile man. He knows his name isn’t on a reservation list at the Pearly Gates, he’s aware that a sinner lives on borrowed time.

Nowadays, everyone is living on borrowed time. Even you.

You, he thinks, looking back to where you stumble over a tree branch, far to good for a world like this.

He can’t help but laugh, the absolute absurdity of his current situation. Escaping death by the skin of his teeth, watching any familiar faces burning in the remnants of a camp he couldn’t really call home. People that fought to the bone, melting or devoured or both.

And then there was you, standing in front of the flames, tears falling down the apples of your cheeks, stiff in shock and horror. He remembers the way your lips moved, mumbling a quiet prayer instead of trying to run. Stupid little thing.

It’s not the earth the meek inherit; it’s the dirt.

Was it pity that made Kenny pull you away from an infernal gravesite all those months ago? He’s never the hero of any story. No, it must have been something else.

Maybe it was the way you looked up with teary eyes, silently begging for help. Unwittingly making a deal with the devil. His teeth grind at the memory, the vision of how beautiful you look so completely helpless.

Kenny leads and you follow, he hunts and you flitch at the sound of an arrow piercing flesh. The small squeak and proceeding thumb of meat as it hits the ground never fails to make you sick. When he’s not hunting for food, he’s hunting something else.

The sounds of death are all the same.

Some days you’re lucky, coming across abandoned hideouts or deserted cars. Snagging whatever hasn’t already been picked over; some ammo, the occasional can of peaches or pack of cigarettes. Kenny laughs dryly everytime, chucking the carton into his bag. Always the cigarettes, never the lighter. Most days, not so much.

Every night, you fall asleep to the flicker of a campfire, lulled by the steady sound of Kenny’s knife as it scrapes against a piece of wood. He’s always the last asleep. The woods are a dangerous place, the possibility of monsters circle at every moment. Under the veil of night, anything could happen. And it does.

He wipes his mouth, settling back into the harsh ground below him with a pleased hum. Your whimpers have settled back into a light snore.

Kenny is a vile man, and you’re too concerned with the lifeless villain in the shadows that you forget about the one sitting on the other side of the fire.

Three months of waking up to aching limbs and misplaced panties can’t be a coincidence, can it?

* * *

“Well ain’t this something.” Kenny pulls on the door, swinging it open with a loud creek. Your neck strains to look up at dark wood and steepled roof, the tall building hidden by dense forest, you two must be the first people to step inside in months.

“A church.” You’d find comfort within these walls if you weren’t so positive that God had abandoned this world.

Statues of the Virgin Mary and Saint Joseph are empty behind their stone eyes, shadowed with an unsettling shade of red from the stained-glass windows. The moment is a time capsule, a vision of the congregation of saints bathed in blood.

A chill runs down your back, counting every vertebrae.

You push down the unsettling foreboding, focusing back on the instincts to survive instead of lingering on a religion that you can no longer make sense of.

“Hey kid, over here.” You pick up the pace, quickening footsteps away from holy symbolism and towards Kenny’s voice. You walk into the closest room off a dark hallway and find him leaning against the doorframe. The rooms are getting darker with the vanishing sun, but you make out shelves of cans and boxes, food, blankets, clothes.

“I bet they used this as a food pantry,” Your comment was probably an obvious assumption, but Kenny just hums in response, “there’s enough here to last up months.”

Good samaritans in the first life are a saving grace is this one. Your cynicism lifts from heavy shoulders for just a moment. The lines between luck and divine intervention are fuzzy at best.

“I saw a well right outside too. Water’s probably cold as ice but it’s better than anything we’ve come across yet.” Kenny’s voice is even, but you swear he cracks a smile.

He was right, the water is cold enough to shatter your bones like ice. You shiver and chatter, teeth threatening to crack, but the feeling of being clean has you dumping bucket after bucket over your head. The grime and grit of your reality running down to seep into the grass below.

There’s no home to run to after the world ends, but water and food is more than you could imagine in recent months. Shuffling through boxes of donated clothes, you find a shirt big enough to sleep in. The fabric smells like moth-balls and dust, but the feeling of clean cotton against your skin is heavenly.

You find Kenny in the clerical office, rummaging through the priests desk. The sun is replaced with a flight of candles, for the first time in forever, you don’t feel like death is standing right behind you.

“Would you look at that,” Kenny pulls a cigar from the desk, bringing it up to his nose for inspection, “Looks like father had his own little habit.”

Despite yourself, you laugh at his comment, rounding towards the large leather chair he’s settled into.

“Smoking kills you know.” You lean against the desk next to him. Your bare legs brush against his knee, the heat from your skin makes his mouth water.

“I think there’s more pressing concerns than tobacco, kid.”

There’s something different about tonight, even more than just the four walls and roof around you. There’s something about Kenny and the way his stare has followed you all night. You can feel a cord pulling taught, fraying in the middle before it snaps.

“Asshole.”

The plush of Kenny’s bottom lip is close enough to your cunt to be disastrous. Friendly banter becomes laughing and swatting at his chest like a teenager. Communion wine and tension pulling you into him. The loneliness of this life becomes more apparent the closer he is to touching your skin. When did the man in front of you make your heart race so fast?

Maybe you’ve always felt this way.

You feel it, the ghosts of last night, the night before. The ghosts of weeks or maybe even months. The familiarity of a touch you weren’t quite awake for.

Ass arching off from where it sticks to the cherry wood, you want to feel it again. The laving of tongue and mouth against you. The devouring of your most intimate planes of skin, places no one else has ever touched before, places you were saving for your future husband.

The kiss as hot as hell.

“Awe, c’mon now,” His nose nudges against your clit, the movement pulling another cry from your throat to bounce against the high ceiling, “that’s not my name.”

“I’ve been tracing it into this precious cunt of yours every night,” each word is more unhinged than the last, no longer worried about the doe in his sights running away, “Do I need to spell it out for you again?”

There’s nowhere to run, pressed in between his canines.

Dreams of calloused fingers and a wandering mouth are now cementing as memories. The feeling of rough facial hair. The sounds of desperate moans and how they shake against you.

The way his tongue curls like a signature.

His mouth is flush against you again, sucking at your aching clit for only a moment before moving his attention to long lashes against your clenching hole.

“You must remember. You were moaning it so sweetly,” he nips at your puffy lips before drawing back. His chin is sheened in your arousal, slick refracting off the dimly lit space between you, flickering candles outline his features with a dance of orange shadows. Kenny’s eyes hold you captive, giving you one more chance to answer.

“What’s my name, kid?”

His tongue breaches you, a set of large, familiar hands keep your legs spread wide atop the desk.

You remember— of course you do. You remember everything. The name stuck in your head like a broken record. The name you call for in a sleepy haze as your body is dragged into orgasm.

The name that’s spelled against you like a promise.

“K-Kenny please.”

That’s all that he needs, the only thing, if he’s being honest, that he’s ever needed.

“There’s my sweet little girl. Finally using your manners.” Two fingers come up to swipe against your pussy, stopping right before your clit and collecting slick to bring up to your eye line for inspection. You jump when the warm digits drag against your bottom lip, a silent prompt for your mouth to fall open.

Kenny sticks his fingers in, the intent to make you gag is clear but you take it. You’ll take anything he gives you. Your tongue swirls around the intrusion, running against each joint and suckling loudly. The sound is wet and lewd, the spit collecting at the corners of your mouth makes his head spin.

Your destruction, he decides, will be beautiful.

Kenny’s fingers release with a wet pop. He runs callouses down from your cheek, over the curve of your tits and down your abdomen. Two fingers stop at your pubic bone to trace lightly against the skin in random patterns.

“Your body is just as agreeable when you’re awake.” His words drip in sin, reminding you exactly how familiar he is with you. All of you.

Both thumbs come down to spread your lips, Kenny can’t help but take a moment-- just a beat-- to stare at your swollen, glossy clit and the quiver of your little hole. Your skin is soft, completely untouched by anyone else. He laid claim to almost every inch before you begged him to.

He sinks from the leather chair, kneeling in front of you. You’re the body and blood as far as a sinner like Kenny is concerned.

There’s a plea stuck in your throat. You want to beg him to slow down, it’s too much all at once, but you know if you cried out-- all you would do is beg him for more.

His tongue is long and flat against you, every swipe is punctuated with a growl. The rumbling from his chest is thrown against your clit like a current through cold water. Sharp, shocking, terrifying.

“Kenny, I- I want,” He sucks your throbbing clit into his mouth, rubbing the tip of his tongue against the hood. There’s no words in any language that make sense to you. There’s nothing but his name.

“Kenny ah, I need, I don’t know how t—”

Your dangling over a fire, trying desperately to jerk away from the lick of the flames.

“I know, kid, I know exactly what you need.” his breath is heavy and warm in fans across your skin. You're dripping down the sides of his face and onto the cleric’s desk. Kenny is covered in you, open mouthed kisses against the sweetest thing he’s ever had in his mouth. The tangy taste of your pussy mixing with the wine still on his tongue.

If he spent forever between your thighs, it wouldn’t be nearly long enough.

“Such a sweet little thing, you’re insatiable.” All you can do is nod dumbly, eyes glazing over with a distinct look of teary submission. It’s so new to you, but grinding upwards and catching your clit against his chin seems like second nature.

The primal need for release is much stronger than any prayer of abstinence.

“What would your little prayer circle think if they knew you spread your legs for a dirty old fucker like me?” Kenny coos against the apex of your thighs. His words knock on the hollow space behind your breastbone.

Your family and friends, the priest from St. Mary’s who baptized you, old man Jaeger from next door— all buried or burned to ash or so much worse.

Anyone you’ve ever loved is dead, maybe that’s why Kenny is still around.

There’s nothing that can hold you back anymore, the control you claw at slips from your fingers like watery silk. There’s no escaping the roughness of his stubble and an evil, serpent tongue.

“Kenny!”

You cum with a shattering cry, the sound ringing so loud in your ears you swear any enemy of the living in a 10 mile radius could hear you. In reality, what escapes is little more than a broken snivel.

It hurts, muscles aching from the exertion of trying to keep from falling apart. Your body is a hairpin trigger, the comedown feels more like withdrawal.

“There’s my girl, my good little girl.” His voice is uncharacteristically soft, doting while you fall back to earth. It’s a strange feeling, you’ve never found comfort in Kenny before, he isn’t the shoulder you go to lean on.

But tonight he’s the chin you buck into.

The aftershocks run across your naked skin, already missing the feeling of his touch as he settles back into the cracked leather chair.

His cock presses into the denim confines uncomfortably, the ache can wait though. Whether this is his last night alive or has all the time in the world-- he’s going to savor the glistening prize nestled between your thighs. Kenny’s fingers find the cigar where it lies next to your knee, bringing it up to examine while you squirm at the cold night air against your wet cunt.

“No one will ever make you feel as good as I do,” both legs kick out, falling to dangle on either side of his knees in surprise as the cigar comes down to trace your outer lips. He presses the tuck inwards, pulling out slightly so you cry out. The harsh texture of the wrapper mixes with the most minimal of stimulation, causing tears to clump in your waterline.

“Why don’t you think of a way to repay me, hmm?”

You push past the heaviness in your muscles, sitting up to meet his incredulous stare. Kenny sticks the cigar between his teeth, striking a match from the desk drawer to light the cap. The cigar is stale, cheap tobacco. But every drag now tastes like you.

“I- I could try to--” Words are left unspoken on your tongue, even now, the intonation is poison in your throat.

You expect Kenny to laugh at your bashfulness, instead, two fingers come up to curl around the Rosary around your neck. He drags you forward, exhaling smoke into your parted, quivering lips. You try your best not to choke.

He pulls the cigar away, ashing it carelessly on the floor.

“Use your words, kid, tell me what you want.” His words are sleazy but his voice is soft around the edges. Prompting you to shuffle onto his lap. His free hand rests in the small of your back to keep you steady.

“I want--” Fuck, your voice feels like it’ll fail, you take a moment to breathe, “I want you to fuck me, Kenny.”

Your plea is rushed, so quick to hit his ears he almost misses it. There’s no hiding anymore, there’s nowhere else in this world but the private quarters of a long-dead clergy member. The space between you and Kenny is foggy and tense, only inches between lips.

There’s no more penance in this world, no more time to sit and atone for his sins with prayer. The soft, syrupy feeling of your cunt wrapping around his cock is a slice of heaven, cut out and stolen right from the sky.

“I thought you’d never ask, doll face.”

✞ all writing is dymphnasprose’s original content, please do not repost or modify. do no read my content as asmr.©️

#aot x reader #aot x reader smut #aot smut #kenny ackerman x reader #kenny ackerman smut #the smut pile: apocalypse #tw: somnophilia #tw: noncon #tw: dubcon #tw: blood #tw: sacrilegious #sin.somnophilia #sin.noncon #sin.dubcon #sin.blood #sin.sacrilege

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foilfreak · 3 years

Text

Beauty and Her Beast: Chapter 3

Warning: This fic is rated NSFW and contains graphic depictions of things some people may find disturbing or alarming, including, but not limited to: violence, gore, unhealthy family relationships, Oedipus complexes, gratuitous amount of pornographic literature, ableist language, physical, mental, and emotional abuse, etc. If you are someone who does not enjoy fiction with these elements in them, then I suggest you refrain from reading this, because this fic will have all that, and probably a lot more. So, this is your first and final warning to turn around and go somewhere else if stuff like this just isn't your vibe, because from this point forward, your emotional wellbeing is in your own hands, and I will not be accepting blame if you disregarded my warnings and ended up reading something you didn't like. Idk why I feel compelled to write one of these despite this being Resident Evil fanfic, but I figured I'd cover my ass just in case.

(Link to ao3 version in comments below)

“Going off the information I have listed here, it appears as though you’ll be receiving subject N-45, today. She’s a healthy 22 year old female. Her short, but muscular body weighs 95lbs with a childish height of 4’10” tall. She possesses primarily Romanian and Filipino ancestry, with some Dutch or Finnish or... whatever, thrown in there as well. And according to the various items we found on her person when she was first brought in, she’s apparently a graduate student at the University of Bucharest, or, at least she was, before she drove her car into a tree while driving up the mountain and was recovered by Heisenberg” Miranda explains robotically, reading aloud from a piece of paper held inside a thick manila envelope. “Of the 4 remaining test subjects, N-45 is easily the most violent and difficult one to work with, having to be either anesthetized or restrained every time I wanted to so much as take her vitals or stabilize her condition. When given smaller doses of sedatives she-”

For the first time in his entire life, Salvatore completely ignores whatever unimportant nonsense Mother Miranda is going on about, continuing to take in and analyze the strikingly unique appearance of the young woman before him.

Upon first inspection, N-45 appeared to resemble that of a normal woman in just about every way possible. Her hair was scruffy and very short, barely long enough to reach her eyes, and a deep black color that looked so soft and luxurious that Salvatore ached to run his fingers through it. Her face was slightly round, giving the young woman a very youthful appearance, with her sharp jawline and prominent cheekbones being some of the only things keeping Salvatore from mistaking her for a child. And lastly, her... figure, if Salvatore had to put such an embarrassing idea into words, was similar to that of Mother Miranda, only shorter, more compact even. It reminded the hooded man of those small packets of candy Duke occasionally gifted him that said “fun sized” on the label, in reference to them being much smaller than the standard sized candy bars and yet somehow being… better, despite technically giving you less candy.

She was already perfect as she was, but it was not just N-45’s beautiful human features that pulled Salvatore in and refused to let him escape the stupefaction he’d been placed under, but also her mutations.

A soft royal blue coated her from head to toe, giving way only to a large patch of solid white located on her chest and stomach. Her skin catches the light in a way that reveals areas of tiny overlapping scales, glimmering like stars in the midnight sky, or freshly polished armor, perhaps, along the bony ridges and tender curves of her figure.

Small white dots distributed like paint splatters across the colored sections of her flesh give a similar visual effect as freckles, starting from her hairline and extending all the way down to the very tips of her toes. These galaxies of white were invisible only on the white patch along the front of her torso, as well as on the lighter blue hue taken on by both the palms and webbings of her hands and feet.

Long Fin-like extensions grew along both her forearms and lower back. The former extended outward and inward like a windshield wiper, likely used to decrease water resistance. The latter, however, perhaps used to increase fine motor maneuverability while swimming at greater speeds or in tighter spaces, grew straight downwards from her lower back in an overlapping fan configuration that marginally covered her rear end, though not by very much. The fins looked like a soft, delicate material that was probably very flexible but very durable, if Salvatore had to guess just from looking.

And to top everything off, N-45 even appeared to even have gills, 2 different sets by the looks of it. The first set of 3 breathing slits was located horizontally along both sides of her neck, while the second set could be found on both sides of her torso, following the downward angle of her ribs but stopping just underneath her soft, plump-looking breasts.

Salvatore feels a sudden wave of heat cascade over his body and he turns his face away in shameful embarrassment as he suddenly realizes that N-45, much like every test subject undergoing cadou treatment, was still very, very nude at the present moment.

“I can’t make any promises regarding her disposition, but physically speaking, she’s ready to be released to you whenever you’d like. I’ll have some of the villagers transport and release her into the reservoir later this week” Mother Miranda says, pressing a button to close the pod now that Salvatore was no longer staring at her.

“W-wait just a m-moment” Salvatore calls out, prompting Mother Miranda to halt the closing of the pod.

“Yes? What is it?” The woman asks curtly, clearly not wanting to stand here and watch Salvatore any longer than she has to.

Wringing his hands together nervously, Salvatore meekly asks, “C-could… could y-you wake h-her up… s-so that I can s-speak with her… j-just for a m-moment?”

Mother Miranda remains silent for a moment, blank face staring directly at Salvatore as she contemplates what to do.

“No, Moreau,” she says finally. “I’ve had a very busy day today and I'm quite tired. N-45 is a menace that I struggle to deal with even on my best days. The last thing I need is something going wrong and her getting out and causing all sorts of chaos.”

Salvatore’s shoulders slump in disappointment, but he makes no further attempts to argue.

Mother Miranda rolls her eyes at the incredibly childish display, walking over to place a gentle hand on Salvatore’s head. “Would it make you feel better if I agreed to have N-45 be the first of the subjects to be dropped off? It’ll be more difficult than my original plan, but I suppose it was a bit unfair that you were the only one who didn’t get to “pick” their gift.”

“Yes, M-Mother Miranda… I-I’d like th-that very… very m-much” Salvatore says, leaning into the touch as Mother Miranda begins guiding him back toward the hallway leading to the exit door.

It wasn’t until after Miranda had exited the lab and begun walking down the long hallway toward the exit that Salvatore dared cast another glance back at the pod that contained N-45, wistfully thinking of how amazing her hand had felt in his, and how much he wanted to speak to her.

Just as the disfigured man was about to turn back and follow Miranda out of the laboratory, a flash of movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention, prompting Salvatore to tense and snap toward the 4 pods, frantically trying to figure out what it was he saw. A few seconds of stillness pass before Salvatore sees movement again, not freely moving about the room like he originally expected, but from within one of the 4 pods, his pod to be exact.

His curiosity momentarily outweighing his nerves, Salvatore slowly approaches the metal capsule, trying to get a look through the small pane of glass that allows visual access into the holding pod.

Another flash of movement has Salvatore flinching, jumping back as though he’d been advanced upon. After several seconds of stillness, however, the hooded man regains his confidence and once again inches his way toward the capsule, moving his head up and down to try and get one more glimpse at N-45 before he has to leave. One last look before she lays eyes upon his vile and disgusting body for the first time, screaming and calling him a monster as she runs away, leaving him alone and without anyone to call his own. Just like always.

“ Hello ?”

Salvatore froze dead in his tracks, his heart pounding and his lungs refusing to take in air, as a soft, muffled, questioning voice reaches the deformed man’s ears, followed by two golden orbs with narrow black slits running vertically through the center, that slowly peek into view from the bottom of the glass window. Salvatore’s eyes widen in shock as he quickly realizes that the orbs of gold are not, in fact, just spheres of color, but rather a pair of eyes, staring intently at him from inside the pod.

“Uuuuuh… u-u-uuum… I-i… I w-was just…” the disfigured man stuttered as he struggled to move his body, seemingly paralyzed by the bewitching gaze currently locked onto him, looking at him with an intensity that makes Salvatore wonder if this is what it feels like to be a cell put under a microscope.

It isn’t until Salvatore notices the golden orbs moving and shifting from one corner of the window pane to the other that the hooded man realizes, to his immediate horror, that he might not be the only one trying to get a better look at the figure located on the other side of the pod door. Panic and fear immediately fill Salvatore from deep within, growing strong enough to allow him to finally overcome his temporary paralysis and skitter away from view. Pulling his hood even further over his petrifyingly grotesque face in shame of himself, Salvatore flees the laboratory as quickly as his hobbled limp would allow.

His heart pounds to the beat of the soft, but desperate pleas of protest coming from N-45’s pod in response to Salvatore’s rapidly retreating form, yet the hooded man cannot bring himself to believe what he hears as true. Perhaps believing that the siren-like voice he hears echoing off the metal laboratory walls to be nothing more than a trick of his sick and lonely mind, Salvatore does not stop, nor does he turn back around until he’s met up with Mother Miranda at the exit to the surface, lungs burning and legs aching from running for so far and long.

“Oh, there you are, Moreau,” Mother Miranda says suddenly, stopping just before they are about to exit the laboratory. “I’m glad you chose this time to finally catch up, because I just realized a second ago that I’d forgotten to give you N-45’s previous name. You can name her something else if you’d prefer, of course, but I offered the information to your siblings so I suppose I should offer it to you as well. Would you still like to know N-45’s name, or would you rather abandon her given name for one of your own choosing?”

After a few seconds of silent contemplation, Salvatore lifts his head, “I… I-i would like to k-know… her n-name… please...” the mutant man says softly.

Mother Miranda briefly raises a questioning eyebrow at Salvatore’s nervous body language, but ultimately rolls her eyes and shrugs her shoulders, all but tossing the Manila envelope containing N-45’s information at the hooded man before disappearing out the large metal door.

“If you’re going to read that now, feel free, but return to the meeting room once you're done. And be sure to lock the door to my laboratory behind you” Miranda commands, her voice having grown echoey due to how far away she now was.

“Yes, M-Mother” Salvatore calls after her as he scrambles to catch the thrown file and prevent any loose papers from falling out. Once he’s got a solid handle on the thick envelope, he opens it, casting a quick glance back in the direction of the pod room, where Nadine and the other 3 gifts were being held for the time being.

Returning to the file, Salvatore frantically flips through every page, trying to find the one that held N-45’s personal background information.

After several minutes of desperate flipping back and forth, Salvatore finally focuses on one particular piece of paper that looked to have been in the file for the longest. Pulling out the particular page he’d found, the disfigured man drops the rest of the folder onto the ground and begins rapidly skimming through the information printed on the page, his hungry eyes refusing to stop until they finally zeroed in on the information he’d been looking for.

Project: E.V.A. Resurrection

Subject: N-45

Parasite Administered: Cadou (Series- N; Strain- 45)

Family Name: Bogdan

Given Name: Nadine

“N… Nadine” Salvatore said slowly, feeling slightly lightheaded and out of breath as each individual letter of the young woman’s name rolled off his tongue like Camembert cheese; smooth, creamy, decedent, and likely to keep him up all night with an upset stomach and a racing heartbeat.

Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Nadine.

The name quickly became a broken loop played over and over and over again inside Salvatore’s head, his mind unable, or rather unwilling, to think of anything else as he read, reread, and then re-reread Nadine’s name at least 100 times, before finally setting the piece of paper down.

“Nadine...” Salvatore breathes the name once again, his voice carrying a wistful tone. “E-even your n-name is wonderful...”

An already beautiful woman, made even more perfect through the power of science and Mother Miranda’s grace, only for all that potential to end up wasted in the hands of a desperately lonely and horrifically mangled fish mutant, who was more likely to accidentally dissolve her in stomach acid than woo her like some kind of aquatic Prince Charming.

“Y-ya right... e-e-even with a-another mutant… I’m s-still so disgusting a-an… and horrifying in comparison… n-not even my o-own kind can b-bring thems-themselves to love me f-for who I a-am… not th-that there’s much of m-me that’s worth l-loving to begin w-with” Moreau laments to himself, wondering if it was even worth holding out hope that things with Nadine could go his way. As if one look at his monstrous form wouldn’t be enough to ruin everything Salvatore already has an agonizingly low chance of ever having with that magnificent specimen of a woman.

Even with Nadine’s own external mutations making it clear that she was no longer fully human, her form had still retained such a beautifully strong, yet womanly shape to it, and her face still looked so young and innocent despite everything that she’s been through. Someone as beautiful as her was far too good and pure to be tainted by his filthy hands.

‘Maybe I should just kill her when the villagers arrive with her at the gate? At least then... I could say I put her out of her misery before she had to experience it for herself…’ Salvatore sulks mentally.

However, despite the self degrading thoughts running through his mind, the memory of the curious look Nadine’s shockingly bright and mesmerizing golden eyes held when trying to look at Salvatore through the pod window made the hooded man shiver, having never been looked upon in such an innocently curious manner before. Most people who got that close to Salvatore didn’t even need to see his face in order to start screaming and running away in terror. However, if the deformed man allowed himself a brief moment to believe that it was indeed her who’d been calling him to come back and show himself, then from the tone and rushed quality of her voice, it would seem as though Nadine was unsatisfied with the fact that she hadn’t seen all of Salvatore’s face and body, not terrified.

How strange...

How very strange indeed…

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steve0discusses · 3 years

Text

Yugioh S5 Ep 20: Yugi’s Senshi Outfit

So I’ve been doing a lot of work, and I haven’t looked at the blog for a hot minute and when I finally checked back in to do these posts I noticed something on my tumblr was just blowing up. I got all excited thinking “oh shoot, Did I draw something right??” and instead, it was a random post I made about the bootspants from season 1. Three years later, resurrected from the grave and covered in...thousands of notes? I don’t understand how this website works.

Anyways, the comments are mostly good, but a little bit wild. A lot of people seem to think I would know what Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure is, when I’m an adult who is still watching the first 5 seasons of Yugioh. (I will never have time to watch Jojo,) and then some other people started talking about Actual Card Mechanics that went...completely beyond my comprehension. But then there was one person. One person who said one thing, and brought it all together.

Poots.

The boots that are pants.

Poots.

I can’t believe I looked at all the different combinations, but a Poots never crossed my brain.

It is so perfect, so cathartic, although it took 3 years to get there.

Poots.

Anyways, we’re in S5 and unfortunately not in poots anymore, Yugi is now dressed in a tupperware container from hell and they have wandered into a desert. On cue, Grandpa has an injury, but at least this time it’s not his ass.

You know how there’s artists who do hyper-realistic versions of pokemon monsters with detailed bone structure and muscle anatomy? I dare them to look at this orb and tell me how the hell it has wings. Like go ahead and try and pin a spine down on that thing. I’ll wait.

(read more under the cut)

So Joey decides to sprint down this endless desert with just boundless positivity.

Over the edge of this sand dune is a whole bunch of huts,just random civilization out in the middle of no where.

One girl walks over and it’s a look.

She’s really the only one here who can talk, and she just seems...so incredibly bored to be here. A whole lot of Wednesday Addams energy. She leads them into a hut where an old guy pulls a scroll out of blue fire. As you do.

Again, this arc should have been a video game, because while it’s something to get the player interested if there’s some riddle they have to solve to progress, when you’re watching a TV show, it’s not like I’m the one solving the riddle. The format is honestly one of the downers of this arc, tbh.

It has strong “I played a D+D sesh and made a webcomic out of it vibe” and I know I just called out like half of you, but listen, I will not take it back.

This episode, our gimmick is some asshole is going to be yelling at us from the other end of the map, just shouting in the background for the entirety of the episode like that tangible human skull meme.

Then Wednesday Addams hands over yet another MacGuffin because why not?

Tea can twin it up with Yugi now. Her necklace doesn’t seem haunted, but it’s only a matter of time. (also her necklace looks so freakin terrible, we’ll see it later and I’ll have a lot more to say because wtf it looks like some sort of polly pocket.)

I’m not 100% that the voice that shouts at us from the end of the hall this episode is Mokuba’s voice actress. But I’m 99% positive it is, or Mokuba’s voice is just really that type of vibe.

Stuff happens, and it felt like card duel stuff, so I’m gonna skip over the part where they pulled out their duel monsters one by one, since the fight was pointless anyway because the worms can turn you into stone. So Yugi and Pharaoh decide to have a chat about it because their plan is clearly not working.

This is when Pharaoh has a vivid lucid daydream, which seems like something that would have been more convenient before he ended up turning into stone on the floor of some desert. But, hallucinations never come when they’re convenient on this show. They usually come during card games, tbh.

Imagine with me that you’re dreaming of like...an old ass greek guy who is 99% Alexander the Great. Imagine he tells you to fuse with a sentient paper card that you already carry around in a weird capsule.

Please

For the love of all that is holy

Do not think about what it means to fuse with the Dark Magician.

Dark Magician is...he “exists” but he’s like not even a person. There seem to be whole fleets of dark Magicians, which are all the same guy, just cloned, right? Or maybe they’re a family? Or like...I don’t freakin know. Like they’re all hanging out together in some card dimension so it’d be more like fusing with the guy who dresses like Barney the dinosaur instead of actually Barney. Like he’s more of like a concept than a dude, but apparently you can just introduce him to your...whatever this armor is supposed to be, and Dark Magician turns into a Super Suit.

I want to express my thanks to the Yugioh team for not putting Yami in his underoos. Hell, they didn’t even take off his jacket. I do not know what art directer ok’d this for animation and said “yeah, this won’t kills us if we animate it.” but that is a hell ton of lines and design right there. Yeah they have 3d, and probably had to 3d that staff...but that doesn’t mean you don’t end up drawing it, in the end--you still have to draw over your 3d. You still have to draw literally everything.

Anyway, when we get to the eye of the storm. The secret to getting there was that you have to fly, which again--3/5 of these guys already have a monster that can fly. We can finally tell the voice at the end of the hall to stop yelling because it’s really bothering all the townspeople, and then move on with the quest.

Everyone else was stone during this. So when they un-petrified they kinda looked over at Yugi and were like “how freakin long was I out???”

But youknow, Yugi’s 2 people, so it’s fine. So long as you don’t get down to the third bastard still sitting around in there.

After this, our NPCs vanish, and the show pushes us directly forward. No time for them to piss off a land turtle or set a bunch of wolves on fire. Just get out of the desert and freakin go.

I’m just so bothered by this random ass huge chunky necklace.

It’s like the size of your freakin fist. And it’s just...a pentagon. Congrats Tea, you have a fake ass plastic necklace. I guess it’s so that when we’re far away we can still see it on her chest but like...This show loves huge ass necklaces, and they’re all basic ass shapes. We got a pyramid, the Kaiba’s wear squares, Bakura wears a circle with kind of phallic bits hanging off of it and this is just...it’s literally just a pentagon.

I guess Ishizu wore a wadjet and Duke has an indecipherable clown as his necklace. But man...the Yugioh necklace game is just a lot of shapes.

And so we continue on with this filler arc, which is also a pokemon arc, and even secretly has a Sailor Moon arc just stuffed in there for funsies. This arc is weird.

Also, I brought up the human skull so I legally have to post this.

youtube

Anyway, here’s a link to read these in chrono order, in case you just got here: https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

And I’m off to drink a bin of ice water because it is 5 billion degrees right now in this house.

#ygo #yugioh #yu gi oh #episode recap #photo recap #S5 #Ep 20 #yugi muto #yami #grandpa muto #tea gardner #and her new accessory #tristan taylor #joey wheeler #and that time that Yami fused with dark magician and we all acted like that wasn't extremely weird

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starfallvalley · 2 years

Text

“A strange sound was heard during the night…”

Stardew Valley. An emerald paradise, caressed by the Gem Sea and nestled into a sleepy corner of the Ferngill Republic. The soil is rich, blessed by mineral-rich meteorites from long ago. Pelican Town rests in the crook of the mountain and sea, insulated from the world.

“There’s something fleshy bobbing around in the fluid…”

A newcomer moves to town, following the footsteps of their grandfather years ago. Something is off about them, but they are welcomed to the town nonetheless, even with their strange ability to know what every single person in town likes. Things settle back into their quiet rhythm.

“Part of the glass is shattered.”

The farmer is awoken with a start. Another gift from the stars has arrived on their farm, and it’s about to cause a whole lot of trouble…

Welcome to Starfall Valley!

Starfall Valley is a project I’ve had brewing for quite a while now. Stardew is one of my favorite games, and on a recent playthrough, I got a Strange Capsule on my farm—a rare event that releases a strange alien into the town. I wondered: what might happen if that alien were a little less passive? What if it broke out of its capsule to search for a new host, instead? And what if a particular farmer happened to be around at the time? That’s where Starfall begins. Pelican Town just got a lot weirder.

This AU is a combination of my own personal interests and musings about the world of Stardew. Imagine it as something akin to Monster Falls (for anyone who’s heard of that). I’ll be going through and writing up as much as I can about how the denizens of the valley and beyond react to their new reality.

A few notes: I’ll most likely end up changing characters around from their canon appearances (let’s face it, Stardew is not the most diverse game out there). I will happily take ideas/suggestions on this part. This includes Ginger Island. People far more intelligent than I have already expressed why this particular section of the game needs some serious work; I will do my best to ensure that I don’t fall into the same kind of neo-colonial mess that the game does. I am not an expert, unfortunately, so I may end up unsuccessful in that regard. I’m working on it!

Also, this is my first time actually running any sort of blog! It will probably be pretty simple and quite messy. It’s an experiment; we’ll see how it goes!

Lastly, this AU contains a lot of themes of transformation, magic, and probably many furries. It will also be very queer.

With all that out of the way, welcome once more. I hope you enjoy your stay. And do keep out of the back room of the library.

<<<MASTERPOST>>>

#stardew #stardew valley #starfall valley #I'll probably use the tag 'starfall au' for this blog to eliminate confusion!#we'll see how things go #granted idk if there are other fandoms with similar names so. oops #starfall au #intro post

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ivushk · 3 years

Note

HELLO. MAY I PLEASE HEAR MORE OF YOUR VAMPIRE AU…. 👉👈

OH MY GOD I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

Okay, SO. BUCKLE THE FUCKLE UP 'CUZ here's what I've got so far:

Nishiki and Kiryu are still orphans at Sunflower. They come from a tiny village just a few kilometres west from the orphanage. It's a very close and closed-off community. The boys' parents died in a fire when they were very little (which is a common theme for the kids at Sunflower and isn't that a crazy coincidence? *smiles mysteriously*), however the Nishikiyama family house wasn't as badly damaged as Kiryu's so it's just sitting there, waiting for its former residents to reclaim ownership as soon as they're able to (I imagine Kazama would help them with that).

In the next years it becomes a home for Nishiki, Yuko and Kiryu (and Yumi, too, though she feels like a visitor for the most part) in everything but name. It's their hangout spot, their "base of operations", their not-so-secret meeting place. When Yuko's health deteriorates so much that she can't stay at Sunflower anymore, the siblings actually properly move in to make arranging the doctor's visits easier.

It's Nishiki's 17th birthday and all three of them are celebrating and playing games and eating cake and having a good time at the edge of the woods not far from the Nishikiyama residence. They're young and loud and stupid (and ignoring the fact that several people went missing over the course of the last few months) and if Nishiki's heart beats a little too hard in his chest when Kiryu gives him his gift - a beautiful, heavy silver pendant on a slightly-worn leather cord - he doesn't think about it too much (and if he notices that Kiryu stares at him just a bit longer than usual without saying a single word but his gaze is so, so, SO fond-- he doesn't think about it either). (he leaves these kinds of thoughts for restless nights because thinking about his best friend in that way during the day... it hurts. the hurt is good sometimes but it's overwhelming).

They're drunk on the cheap beer they've smuggled from Gen-san's fridge and high on happiness. Unaware that the very same night it would all go crashing down.

At some point they all quiet down and go a little further into the woods than they normally would but no one pays any mind to that. And when suddenly their trio turns into a duo with the sudden absence of the birthday boy himself no one immediately starts panicking. He's been gone for ten minutes, twenty, half an hour. Kiryu tells Yuko to go back to the village, to gather everyone, make them start a search party or something while he keeps looking for her brother (the only things he'll find are the pendant he's gifted to Nishiki with the leather cord torn and the broken shards of his own hope). They never find him.

A year goes by and they hold a funeral for Nishikiyama Akira. Even though there's no body for them to bury. Yuko doesn't cry (she doesn't believe he's really dead). Neither does Kiryu (he used all of his tears up that night, the guilt choking him, and the night after that, and the night after that, and the night-). Yumi does, however. And the nice old lady who gave both Nishiki and Kiryu money for helping her do chores around the house. And the man who gave Nishikiyama a part-time job at his shop (to put at least something towards the cost of his sister's treatment, he felt so indebted to Kazama, and that debt weighed down on him). And a few of the girls and boys from Sunflower too.

Another two years pass. Kiryu moves away to the big city at the behest of Kazama. "It's important for you to continue your education," he says. ("It's important for you to move on," he keeps these words to himself). Kiryu really tries his best. Even makes a few friends (although he's still on the fence about whether he can actually call Oda his friend). It goes as well as it could have considering his circumstances. They say that time heals but Kazuma Kiryu never finds out if there's any truth to those words because he recieves a very short letter - an invitation, actually. To another funeral. But this time it's Yuko they're burying. This time they actually have a body to bury.

Tachibana offers his condolences. Oda offers him a ride to the village and back. Kiryu accepts both.

He can't help but compare this funeral to the last one he's been to. There are fewer people. Fewer tears, too. More flowers. It's quieter and feels something like closure (in truth, it's anything but). Yuko also left behind a will (more like a bunch of wishes since it wasn't an official document but the community decided to honour them anyway). Almost all of her possessions went to the kids from Sunflower, except for the Nishikiyama family house (which on paper actually belonged to Shintaro Kazama) which she left to Kiryu. He can't quite believe it when he hears it and feels his heart break under the onslaught of childhood memories. Still, he goes there later that evening. He finds that little has changed in the time he spent away from the house, from the village, from... all of this, really. There are the same pictures on the walls collecting only slightly less dust. The same books on the shelves and under the broken legs of the old pieces of furniture. The same medicine bottles and equipment in the bedroom, though doubled in quantity. Kiryu's not as devastated as he thought he'd be when he walks around what he used to call his home.

He goes through all the rooms, taking notes of every single thing he finds and every single thing he doesn't. He probably misses a bunch of things (he's not as good at that sort of thing, Nishiki's always had a much better eye for details). Once back outside, he looks for the secret stash they made back when they were teenagers. It's like going through a time capsule. There's a pack of cigarettes he and Nishiki once stole from the teacher's bag, copybooks filled with ugly doodles, dreams for the future and dried flowers and leaves, caps from soda bottles, rocks they thought looked cool, photos and birthday cards damaged by time and weather... the pendant Kiryu gave to Nishiki the last time they saw each other. And a small notebook Kiryu's never seen before. A diary of sorts, a recounting of their days together and their days apart. The handwriting is unmistakingly Yuko's.

It fills him with nostalgia, tears welling up in his eyes, unshed. His heart sinks when he finally reaches the pages where Yuko recounts the last few weeks before she-

She writes about her brother, which is understandable. What's less understandable is the fact that she speaks of him as though he was there, with her. Physically present. Kiryu could chalk it up to the girl being delusional in her dying moments but it doesn't feel right to do so. It's stupid, it's absolutely impossible, he's confused, he's hopeful, why would Yuko hide her notebook there?

The last page. A message. For Kiryu. "Please, Kazuma-kun, help my brother".

Against his better judgement, Kiryu decides to spend the night in the house. Sleep doesn't come to him but that's fine. He sits in the living room, trying to make sense of everything. He sits there until it's way past midnight, until the distant barking of the dogs quiets down, until the rustling of leaves stops, until the very air around him grows still and silent and somehow charged with strange energy. And then he hears it. Three uncertain taps against the window. Kiryu turns his head. It's him.

"Kiryu... Let me in. Please."

He does, without thinking. (He could never very well say no to Nishiki. Even if it got them both in trouble. Even if he's not real.)

The quiet is deafening. It really is him. His best friend (whom he thought dead). His kyoudai. Before Nishiki could say anything, Kiryu wraps him in a tight hug. The only heartbeat between them is Kiryu's own, thundering against his ribs. Nishikiyama doesn't let the hug last, putting some distance between them. He looks guilty, tired; looks at Kiryu with sadness, with longing and something else that he can't quite decipher yet (and it makes him scared but why?). Nishiki also looks older than Kiryu remembers. Not a 17-year-old boy anymore, no. About the same age that Kiryu is now.

Has his gaze always been so sharp? Have his fangs always been this pronounced?

They talk until their throats are hoarse. Until Nishiki pulls out a bottle with some liquid that smells strongly of iron and drinks from it and in that moment Kiryu believes everything his friend has told him. It's crazy, but he does.

Nishiki was abducted that night. Taken from them. By vampires. They hurt him. Forced him to fight other humans (just like him then) for his survival. They fed on him.

It went on and on and on... Days turned into weeks, turned into months, turned into years. Only thoughts of Yuko, and Kiryu, and Yumi kept him going. He wanted to see them again. He hoped he would. That hope was crushed when Nishikiyama met his match in the arena. No, not his match. Someone far stronger. He lost and was tossed out to die. But another vampire saved him. It was a woman, whose face he saw often among the spectators of his fights. She stood out from the crowd, since she never cheered for any of the humans. Never put any bets. Only looked at all that madness with quiet horror. "Reina" she said her name was.

She gave Nishiki blood. Her own blood, and the blood of the vampires that were much stronger and more powerful than her (but not wiser), and human blood.

He turned and it was even worse than the years of anguish he had experienced. The pain and constant thirst almost drove him mad until he was taught to deal with them.

Nishiki was given a second chance. He escaped. And ever since that moment he's been trying his damndest to help other victims of those monsters. Both, the poor imprisoned souls and the villagers who might have shared his fate otherwise.

THAT CONCLUDES MY MAD RAMBLINGS BECAUSE I HAVEN'T THOUGHT OUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT THAT WELL

also i don't remember the last time i wrote this much in one sitting and i'm tireeeeeed. i'm not cut out to be a writer and it shows nghghghhhhhh

but! but! but! i have a couple thoughts on where the story goes:

kiryu decides to stay in the village and help nishiki

they uncover the vampires evil plans and recruit a few other characters to fight on the side of JUSTICE (i.e. kazama, who up to that point has been kind of in cahoots with the vamps - hence trying to atone by means of creating the Sunflower orphanage; kashiwagi; yumi; reina; tachibana and oda; majima, and yeah he was actually the one that defeatead nishiki and unknowingly caused him to become a vampire, also majima himself turns into a vampire later in the story thanks to a certain mad simp nishitani)

yuko comes back as a vampire

at some point the scene from my fanart happens; something along the lines of kiryu and nishiki being found by the evil vamps and being attacked. then of course nishiki saves kiryu (who's still baffled that this shit is happening to them and vampires are REAL) and tells him to run which he doesn't but it works out fine in the end

the scene of nishiki drinking kiryu's blood is a MUST because i. love. that. shit. (it's also extremely horny dfjvhsdkfhiasdfhisd)

nishiki's personality is somewhere in between his ykz0 and ykz k*wami self (like, he's much colder now but he still cares about others and does things not just for the sake of his own ambition)

idk about the end but immortal boyfriends? sounds nice?

#i'm so sorry anon this took so long #i went to bed and slept for like 12 hours and then my neck and back were really bothering me ghjklkjljfkjg #i had to take a few smoke breaks along the way #writing shit is hard #OKAY I'M DONE WITH EXCUSES SORRYYYYY #nishikiryu #yakuza #vampire!au #ask

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lilydalexf · 3 years

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Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.

Interview with Dreamshaper

Dreamshaper has 54 stories at Gossamer. Her stories often feature Mulder and Scully exploring their feelings in ways you really, really wish you could’ve seen on the show. I’ve recced some of my favorites of her stories here before, including Found in Memory, Just By Existing, Purpose, and Promise. Big thanks to Dreamshaper for doing this interview.

Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)?

I'm not at all surprised people are still reading X-Files fanfic! There's a deep catalogue of good and interesting fiction there, and the X-Files still has cultural significance. And of course there were the recent seasons to bring it back to mind. I think if you had asked me in 2000, I might not have supposed that it had this kind of staying power. So now I'm thinking of this interview as a time capsule--what will my answer be in 2040?

My own fic was not designed to have staying power. If anyone is reading it now, bless them, they are kind and patient. I would only recommend probably reading the first and last things I posted just to see what kind of growth is possible. The first time I ever posted fic, someone told me to never write again. I was a teenager. I was crushed but I went on writing anyway, and I worked hard to improve.

What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience? What did you take away from it?

I think of two things. As for the show itself, I still think of Mulder/Scully as the ultimate in romance. I can still picture certain moments from the episodes, from the movie. I look for pairings with tension that reminds me of theirs--an almost-regency level of UST, but with a modern element of danger.

As for the fandom itself, I grew up in it. My entire online life and the core of how I participate in fandom was formed here. I was 17 or so when I started writing and posting MSR. I was 18 or 19 when I started meeting fans in real life. I was fortunate enough to fall in with people who were equal parts gracious and nerdy, and while my own nerdiness is innate, I remember and emulate the kindness which was shown to me.

I have an entire side post to this question about how strongly I disagree with the current age stratification in fandom--this idea of not interacting across artificial age divides is tragic to me.

Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)?

ATXC, and mailing lists. I don't actually remember the names of all the mailing lists! I can picture myself sitting in my kitchen on my computer, and what the emails looked like--the font, the signature lines--but not the names. I can even remember specific conversations we had! One of them must have been Scullyfic, because I remember the first meetup being planned. Is that right? Was it the Scullyfic meetup? [Lilydale note: Probably was Scullyfic. There was a big email flurry when the first Scullyfic mailing list meetup was being planned.] My mind was absolutely blown by the idea of a fan con. Now I've led panels at a dozen of them.

I remember some of the arguments, too. It's funny that some of them are the same arguments I still see here and there, like whether or not criticism of a fanwork is valid. Real Person Fic being this unbelievably shameful thing you had to ask to be shown, and the doyennes of the fandom would have given you the cut direct at Almack's if they'd found out, you know?

This was also the era of AIM and ICQ. mIRC too, right? I spent a lot of time in channels. I absolutely loved when people started to be more open about themselves in chats. I was always so interested in how fandom fit into people's lives. Some people I talked to were moms, college students, people who had interesting careers, and they all just found ways to make fandom work for them. They had a need and were meeting it, despite the pressures of their offline life.

I don't know how to explain the impression that made on me, but--it normalized fandom. That seems obvious, maybe, but I hadn't known this was something you could integrate into your everyday life.

It also normalized the idea of women taking their own needs as primary, in a way that went beyond what I was exposed to in my home life, or through the feminism of the 1990s. There was this wild intersection of the--the domestic and intellectual life of women, and the playful life of women, just making itself known to me in a way I'd never seen before. That was enormous. Absolutely a foundational experience for me.

My experience was that ATXC and email lists were like, these surface-level interactions where people figured out, roughly, if your mind ran on a similar track to theirs, and then you were invited to make deeper relationships in more private corners of the internet. Social media filled both functions at once, I think, for a while. But the privacy was missing. I'm not surprised that Slack and Discord are starting to fill that private corner gap--everything old becomes new, etc.

What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show?

UST and monsters. This is still an unbeatable combination for me!

What got you involved with X-Files fanfic?

I loved romance novels--I read so many of them. Somehow, before we even had a computer at home, I started to tell myself romance novel stories with Mulder and Scully as the lead characters. This was how I talked myself to sleep--I wasn't a good sleeper. Then when I got online and did whatever search led me to ATXC, I was just shocked. Shocked! Can't do the surprise justice, in this era where fanfic is relatively mainstream. Other people had also independently invented this thing I loved! But they wrote their ideas down! I jumped on the bandwagon immediately.

What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom?

It's like my relationship to my childhood, frankly. Foundational, but I don't think about it all that much on a daily basis, right? I smile and reblog gif sets. I get nostalgic. I get embarrassed by social mistakes I made. I feel the way many of us do about memories from our teenage years. I wouldn't be who I was without it, but I'm not still in it.

Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files?

I was. I've spent 20 years in fandom! I did some beta work for someone who'd started writing slash--The Sentinel. The actual Sentinel, not just an endless loop of Sentinel AUs based on Sentinel AUs based on etc. I had some idea at the time that I was queer, but this was my first real exposure to romances that weren't straight. So I tore my way through the early 2000s slash fandoms as they developed: The Sentinel, Due South, Stargate Atlantis. Popslash, where a mix of good writing and absurdity ruled. Bandom, where I met my wife. Since then, many smaller fandoms.

It's hard to compare any of these things to each other, let alone to the X-Files. In each one, I was lucky enough to find a circle of women who were strong beta readers and good friends. I never wrote as much or for as long as I did in the X-Files.

Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully?

I watched the new episodes. I've shown friends important episodes--I remember that a few years ago, another friend and I tried to hook a third friend on the show by binging some favorites--mostly shippy MOTW, so it was like, Arcadia, Triangle, Bad Blood. Fun stuff!

We finish watching and I'm like, well? And? And she says, that was fine, but I'm more of a man-pain, secret babies kind of person? I'll never forget it. She had no idea but she'd hit the nail on the head! We were wheezing with laughter. We went back and watched mytharc episodes, which was much less fun for me, but much more interesting to her.

Do you ever still read X-Files fic? Fic in another fandom?

I don't read X-Files fic often. I look at new things sometimes, and I've reread a few old classics, but my reading taste has changed so much. I still love straight romance, but it needs to be fast and sharp in a way that is hard to find.

I read fic in other fandoms when I have time. In the past few years, I've finished a degree, had a daughter, renovated a small Victorian and then sold it and bought another one during this pandemic--so time has been short. Currently I read some Untamed fic, some Good Omens fic, Magicians, Schitt's Creek...a sampler. Whatever friends are writing, whatever they recommend.

What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise?

I never have a favorite of my own fics. I'm never satisfied. The second I post something, I'm always full of regrets. I've written fics that did very well and still hated them a month later. People have asked me over the years to move more of my stuff off Livejournal and onto ao3, but I do it really reluctantly and only by specific request. Everything's ephemeral! Let the old works diminish, and go into the West!

Do you think you'll ever write another X-Files story? Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online?

I have no oldies to dust off. I do periodically think of X-Files stories I would tell, but I don't have enough time for current interests--and so it goes.

Do you still write fic now? Or other creative work?

I do. I was most recently writing in The Magicians fandom. I posted a couple new stories in an old fandom last year--I'd written Good Omens fic fifteen years ago, and then again for the Amazon adaptation. I have a pile of original novels in various stages of completion, but I'm never happy with them. One day I'll figure myself out, perhaps, or I'll just keep writing myself this and that and leaving it all in a drawer.

What's the story behind your pen name?

So AOL had a character limit for user names--I think it was 10. I was a teenager at the time I was coming up with the one I'd use for fandom, so I went with Dreamshaper. It was kind of literal, in the sense that I was going to share the stories I'd been telling myself to help me sleep. But the character limit meant I went with Dreamshpr, which I later liked because of the alternate reading of Dream*shipper*. A reminder to the younger fans that we were the original shippers!

I would also come up with new pen names when I wanted to experiment with a fic that didn't fit my usual style. I don't remember any of them. I probably did that a dozen times, so, sorry to those poor completely abandoned stories.

Is there a place online (tumblr, twitter, AO3, etc.) where people can find you and/or your stories now?

Giddygeek on tumblr and ao3. I'm most active on twitter, but largely about my domestic life with dips into fandoms or original writing; message me on tumblr if you're an old friend who'd like to reconnect elsewhere.

Is there anything else you'd like to share with fans of X-Files fic?

Just gratitude--I'm so glad that I found people to share an obsession with, and that they were good people, at a time in my life where that made a significant difference to me. I don't know where I'd be now without my time and my growth in this fandom!

(Posted by Lilydale on December 22, 2020)

#new post #old school x #xfiles fanfic #xf fanfic #xf fanfic author interviews #dreamshaper

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higuchimon · 3 years

Text

[fanfic] Results of Evolution

One quick glance at his opening hand told Ryou that this wasn’t going to be an easy duel. He couldn’t be certain of what his opponent had, but just based off of his cards, it would not be easy to manage this.

He'd always been able to figure out his strategy just from the first hand. What he saw here wasn't the strategy he was used to. He could see the bare bones of it in the back of his mind, but it would require more time to see the whole thing. Time he would have to buy for himself.

If he wanted to be honest, if he’d had this hand during any of his Academia day duels, he wouldn’t have cared. He would have known without a shadow of a doubt that nothing his opponent could do would be able to counter his tactics. Now he wasn’t so certain. Now he knew that there were other people out there who were every bit as good as he was – and in one case, at least one who was better.

But this was different. He was in the underground. How good could the duelists here be? He could manage this. He would make it back to the pros.

All he needed to do was win this duel.

So he got to business. He set Call of the Living Dead face-down - he would use that to call back Cyber Dragon at some point. He didn't doubt for a second that this opponent would find a way to destroy his monsters. Better to be prepared for it.

Then he activated Time Capsule, considering quickly which card to set into it. Fusion was an option, or Power Bond. Either one could get him Cyber End Dragon and once he had that, there wasn't anything that could stop him. He’d won so many duels with Cyber End.

If he’d been able to summon that against Edo – and if he’d noticed Edo’s face-down card -

But the vaguest thought, something too thin to even be considered a strategy, but something else altogether, a mere whisper of an idea, offered a different solution.

Overload Fusion? The problem with that one was that he couldn't use it to summon Cyber End Dragon - it was only capable of summoning a Dark-Attribute Machine-Type Monster. He had very few of those in his deck. In fact, the only one that he could think of was -

Chimeratech OverDragon. It would work with the setting of Call of the Living Dead - he would need a Cyber Dragon on the field. But he wasn't sure.

His eyes flicked first to the far side of the field where Inukai awaited, then back to his hand. He could feel the pressure of eyes on him, the spectators and those of Saruyama as well. He had to make his decision in a heartbeat.

He slipped Overload Fusion out of his deck and set it aside for later. He couldn't imagine what situation would lead to him calling that monster - he'd set it into his deck as a desperation move, but no one had ever pushed him to the point he'd been that desperate. He wasn't sure if that could even happen now.

But then Inukai began to duel - and it was clear in the first few seconds that his deck had all but been designed to destroy a Machine-Type deck - his type of deck. Was it by accident? Or had Saruyama done this on purpose?

From what little he knew of his so-called 'manager', he wouldn't have been even remotely surprised. He wondered what else he hadn't been told. Would it be possible to even leave this place before the end of the duel?

No. Even if there was, he wasn't going to leave. Not unless it was in victory. He would do this. Somehow. Somehow. Then he would shake the dust of this place off of his feet and never think of it again. It had been a mistake to come here.

Future Fusion - he could summon Cyber Twin Dragon, and deal massive damage to his opponent. Maybe even enough to defeat Inukai. He did the math in a heartbeat – the first attack would destroy Clone Slime, and the second could possibly do a direct attack. Clone Slime did have an effect, though, so that would have to be considered. He wasn’t sure what that effect was, though.

So maybe he couldn’t win just yet. Regardless, Cyber Twin Dragon wouldn't be able to attack until the turn after it was summoned and that would, unfortunately, give Inukai time to counter it.

But before Cyber Twin Dragon could even appear, Inukai countered it, negating the activation of Future Fusion. As if that weren't enough of an insult, he offered Ryou a very sadistic choice - either summon a low-level Machine-Type or deal a thousand points of damage to Inukai.

It wasn't an easy decision. If he takes the damage, he'll have six thousand still. But if I can summon a monster, I have a better chance to cause real damage. That went through his head in a matter of breaths. He summoned out Proto Cyber Dragon, and sent it blasting towards Inukai's Clone Slime.

Only to learn there was a reason it was called Clone Slime - it switched out with Acid Slime, which was destroyed, and delivered eight hundred damage to Ryou himself.

Only seven hundred left. Ryou hadn't ever felt so cornered. Even when he had fought against Juudai, he'd so easily been able to think his way out of any situation. Now he felt as if nothing he did mattered, as if no move he could make would bring him a victory. His head throbbed, though if it were from hunger or thirst - he'd not eaten before coming here - frustration - or from the fact Inukai so expertly and effortlessly countered him - he didn't know. He wasn't sure if he cared. He just wanted this to be over with.

I have three hundred life points, he realized after the attack of Multiple Slime sent Proto Cyber Dragon to the graveyard. It's going to be over soon. If I draw one more Machine-Type monster... He could get around it if he could summon something straight from the deck, but if he drew - then it was all over.

This would also be the turn where he got Overload Fusion into his hand. This would be the last turn for him, one way or the other. If he drew a monster, then something would destroy it. If he didn't, then he -

Wait. Something clicked. A strategy - a plan. A simple, clean, and clear thought, as he drew his card and saw what it was.

He had Power Bond in his hand. Now he'd drawn Cybernetic Fusion Support. He had three Cyber Dragons in his graveyard, so he could do this.

He could summon Cyber End Dragon. The risk remained; he had nothing that could counter it. Inukai had seven thousand Life Points; Cyber End would have eight thousand. Multiple Slime had fifteen hundred attack points. Inukai would still survive it, unfortunately. But it would give him time. Time to finish this. And he would at least have summoned Cyber End Dragon. He wouldn’t be so damned frustrated.

Or at least that was his hope, that died a brutal death a breath later when Inukai activated Slime Hole. Now he had fifteen thousand life points, and Ryou had only a hundred and fifty.

His gaze fell on the card he'd most recently added to his hand - Overload Fusion. He knew the monster that he could summon - needed to summon. Only this monster would give him victory. Nothing else could do it.

And he wanted that victory. After all this time, he admitted it to himself. Respecting his opponent didn't mean a thing to him anymore. How could it, when his opponent didn't respect him, went out of his way to wreck every plan that Ryou made, and mocked him every step of the way? Even Edo had been better than this.

Respect could die a horrible, painful death. What he wanted was victory, and if that meant he would rip it away from Inukai then he would do so.

I think the deck wanted me to do this from the beginning. Here was Call of the Living Dead. There had been Time Capsule, so that he could get Overload Fusion into his hand at just the right moment. He knew that he'd never had the same talent for hearing spirits that Juudai had, but perhaps it didn't matter now. He had something better.

He had victory.

He'd heard what Saruyama kept on calling him throughout this duel. Hell Kaiser. He liked the sound of that. This duel - this underground - it was a place of Hell, without a doubt. A place that he would master and control. This wouldn't be his last duel here, not by a long shot.

But it would be Inukai's. And it would be the last duel for anyone who dared to face him.

Hell Kaiser unleashed his full power. And knew that it wasn't enough. It would never be enough. But he enjoyed seeing his opponent fall, and knowing it was the beginning of his new life.

The End

Notes: Strictly speaking, Overload Fusion in the anime probably could be used to summon Cyber End. But I thought it was more fitting to use the real effect. Ryou's duel against Inukai is one of the most pivotal of his career, and quite frankly, Saruyama had him read like a book. All that Ryou did before this was, for the most part, summon Cyber End and blast. He needed to learn actual tactics. Like Saruyama said, if he couldn't summon Cyber End, then he never knew what to do, and no one ever tried to stop him, so he wasn't learning or growing. But Hell Kaiser changed all of that.

#fanfic #higuchimon writes #ygo gx #gxmonth2021 #marufuji ryou

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sh1tbird-shantytown · 3 years

Note

Ah thank you for answering my Stommy ask i loved it a lot. Can i get some more Stommy.

Okay so like what if Tommy finally sees what Steve's doing with the kids amd the mindflayer and acts like he's down to help and he is he wants to help steve.

But at the same time he has a bit of a breakdown infront of everyone and his whole bad boy persona drops and he's scared he didn't expect this, he didn't believe in anything like this before and he doesn't understand how steve does it.

Can i get some Johnathan being sympathetic to Tommy and sort coming to an understanding with him, and they get eachother, (i like to think that Tommy isn't rich like steve and is more like the byers than everyone thought. Like he comes from a broken home and all the fancy clothes he gets from steve)

Ooo and some tommy and johnathan being like ugh "rich people"

Will and Tommy moment though where will is like :O and Tommy takes him under his wing like Steve did with Dustin

Whoa this is long. Im so sorry. I hope you have a good day.

stommy for sure. thanks, hun!

===

He didn’t expect it to happen. He never really did, he would get a call from Hopper or Joyce or Dustin usually. Cancel everything and go play near death whack-a-mole for a few hours. He’s gotten real good at it at this point. Tommy was suspicious, started asking questions.

“Where are you going off to?” he’d shown up at the Harrington house. Steve wouldn’t let him in, his bag of monster hunting supplies and his stained nail bat poking out prominently. “Or do you have someone in there with you?” Tommy moved his head around to search behind Steve’s shoulders.

“No, Tom,” Steve put his hands up, “Some stuff just came up. An emergency.”

“Is your mother in the hospital? Is your father back home and he’s sending you out for errands so he can invite his side chick over—“

Steve leaned against the doorway, unamused, “—Come on, Tom, that’s not funny.”

But Tommy didn’t stop, “—Is Dustin sick? What’s so important that you had to cancel twice on me this week? Huh!” Steve closed his eyes for a brief moment, collecting his bearings. He stepped out and closed the door behind him.

“Look,” he slowly took Tommy’s hand, the other watching with clear suspicion. “I would much rather stay in with you and watch your stupid drama movies.” The other’s face twisted a little but he listened. “Hopper needs me right now, important, top secret, emergency.” He squeezed Tommy’s fingers a little with every accentuated word. “It’s best that you don’t know, you’re safer that way.” He had hoped that would get Tommy to back off. Wishful thinking.

Tommy shook his head and crossed his arms defiantly, “I’m coming with you for sure now. You don’t get to keep things like this from me now. No secrets.” Steve opened his mouth but Tommy pinched his arm, interrupting him. “No secrets! Okay? You don’t get to go risk yourself, or whatever you’re implying, and leave me in the dark!” Tommy stomped his foot and Steve had the mind to assume he’d been paying attention to all his sisters way of dealing with their own boyfriends. Tommy cupped both sides of his cheeks when Steve sighed. “I am your boyfriend,” he made Steve look at him. Tommy looked concerned, face wrinkled and cheeks pale. “I deserve to know.”

His shoulders sank as he gave in, “You’re not going to like it. Probably won’t even believe it.”

Tommy glared, “Try me.”

Steve went back into the house and grabbed his bag. Tommy quickly noticed the bat, obvious about it with his wide eyes not meeting Steve’s own and instead on the spikes peaking out over his shoulder. He didn’t ask yet though. Instead, he followed Steve all the way to the BMW and then got in the passenger side.

Steve looked over at Tommy sitting rigidly before starting the ignition. There were intense lines between his eyebrows and his lips were being abused by him biting them. He started gnawing on his fingernails when Steve made a decision.

He stepped out quick and Tommy startled, “Where are you going now?”

Steve leaned back in, antsy, “I’m going to get you a weapon.” Tommy looked like he desperately wanted to ask, Steve waited, but Tommy just sat back with his leg bouncing. He sighed again and Tommy glanced over at the noise. “You don’t have to come. It’d be better if you just stayed here until I get back.” Tommy folded his arms, leg still going up and down due to the weight of his hand not lessening it.

“Like hell I am,” he grumbled, “Go get me something if it’s so necessary.” Steve’s shoulders and ankles were tense and locked a little in place. This wasn’t going to end well even if Tommy believe him. He wasn’t supposed to add anyone else to the group. All he had as an excuse was Tommy’s unrelenting behavior and how immediate and stressed Hopper had sounded when he called. The excuse that maybe more help was necessary.

So Steve went to the shed and found a chain. A long iron chain that his father had used to hold the fence gate between theirs and the neighbors’ yards shut. He went back to the car with it in hand. When he sat back down Tommy stared wonderingly at it. Steve dropped it in his lap, the sound heavy as it slipped slowly to the car floor and clanked together.

“Can you still lasso?” he asked quietly. Didn’t want to trigger Tommy into some spell of hysterics.

Tommy swallowed and his eyes grew even more serious than before, “Yeah, yeah I can still lasso.”

Steve looked from the chain to Tommy’s face a few times, “Can you do to the same with that as you can a rope if we need you to?” He’d seen Tommy lasso, done some himself in the summers on the Hagan farm. Their small farm that housed loads of milk cows. It was a nice escape, mostly outdoors and their house was rundown only a little. Obviously warn from love and family and sweet time. Something real against the Harrington’s artificial capsule.

Tommy nodded again, “I can make it work.” When Steve didn’t catch Tommy’s eye for another minute or so, he started out to the Byers’ house. He could tell Tommy was trying to pay attention to the route but he kept messing with the chain. Steve knew he was forming it around to form the lasso correctly. Had seen Tommy sit on a bale of hay and mess with a rope the same way.

They pulled up to the dusty driveway and Tommy finally looked up with recognization, “Who exactly is involved in all this?”

Steve parked and neither of them moved, “Well, we’ve got all the Byers, Mike and Nancy Wheeler, Lucas Sinclair, Dustin, and Hopper”

Tommy glared over at him and opened his door, “What kind of shit have you gotten yourself into?”

Steve only smiled thinly and he stepped out to grab his bag from the backseat before heading up to the door. Hopper was smoking and watched him as Tommy slowly gathered his chain.

“What did you do now?” Hopper didn’t sound surprised.

Steve could only shrug, “He insisted.”

Hopper took a drawn out puff, “Well you should have resisted.”

Steve turned his neck to glimpse as Tommy closing the car door, “You trying resisting a Hagan and then get back to me.”

Hopper raised a brow and flicked the ash off the filter, “Just keep him by you and make sure he doesn’t get hurt. I don’t want to have to explain to his parents.”

Steve rubbed his upper arm as Tommy walked up to his side, “Why would I get hurt? And what’s wrong with my parents?” he ordered defensively.

Hopper sighed and squished the cherry out in an outdoor ashtray balanced on the porch railing, “Nothing, kid. Your father just doesn’t like me.”

Tommy muttered something Steve only just barely caught, “You just can’t leave an innocent drunk man alone on a Friday night.”

“What’s that?” Hopper’s eyes narrowed. Tommy folded his arms and didn’t respond, only shook his head once.

Steve looked between the two. He knew Tommy’s father liked to drink sometimes. Mostly after a long day working on harvesting hay bales and tending to their cows. Knew his mother and Tommy’s sisters hated when he did. Tommy didn’t know how to feel, got mad at Steve when he tried to sympathize. A few of their fights had ended in Tommy throwing the fact that Steve’s father was never really around back in his face. Yelling he wouldn’t understand. Couldn’t. Not the same way.

“What’s the code?” he asked to break the heavy tensions, to at least try. Instead a new sort of shadow surrounded them.

“Orange,” Hopper took his hat off and rubbed his forehead, “Looks like more strays are picking off cattle at night. We need to go catch them.”

Tommy perked up, “Cattle? So you do know what’s been picking our calves off?” he shouted. “What is it? Why are you hiding it from the town? Us farmers!” He was livid and when Steve touched his arm to comfort, it was whacked away. He stepped back, a bit betrayed. The adrenaline in Tommy must have picked up already. He only acted like this when he was wound up tight and angry. Hopper was silent for a long moment as Tommy huffed his breaths in and out, upset.

He turned around to the house and said, “You’re about to find out,” before the door opened and closed.

“What is going on, Harrington?” Tommy asked, desperate now. Desperate for answers he hadn’t asked for. Made Steve annoyed that he allowed himself to get pent up again. Out of control of himself, the opposite of what they’d been working on. He took Tommy’s hands gently, at least thankful for Tommy allowing that much.

“I need you to take a few deep breaths, Sweetheart,” he used his calm tone. Used it for the kids when they got too scared sometimes. “This isn’t going to get any easier, so if you want to step out, do it now.” He waited and Tommy didn’t move, didn’t really do anything besides stare at him. “Is that a no?”

“I’m not leaving,” Tommy stated stubbornly.

“No one would think any less of you,” Steve said deeply, “We all wish we didn’t have to deal with this shit. You can go back home, you wouldn’t be able to tell people about this. The government will confiscate you otherwise.”

Tommy scoffed, “So my father isn’t some crazy conspiracy theorist.” Steve didn’t answer, didn’t really want to, didn’t think he needed to.

“It’s scary, Tom.”

Tommy puffed out his chest, “I don’t care. I’m staying with you and that’s final.”

The door opened and Dustin started yelling, “Son of a bitch, why is he here, Steve? Get your ass in here, we need to start planning!” Steve turned and Dustin started attempting to drag him up the porch. “We’ve got target on three different farms tonight.” He stopped and Steve almost tripped on the last stop. He asked Tommy, “Dont you live on one?”

Tommy’s shoulders rose, “What’s it to you?” Dustin glanced at Steve, who was giving a warning glance, shrugged his shoulders and headed inside again.

Steve grabbed the door and held it open for Tommy, “Come on then!” Tommy ran up and into the house, the warm waft of heat blown into their faces. Joyce met them first, Dustin rushing back into the other room.

She eyes Tommy worriedly, “Did you tell him anything yet?” Steve shook his head. She wasn’t mad, she instead waved then in more, “Well then we have quite a bit to catch you up then, huh?” she smiled welcoming. Walked them in through to where everyone was already staring over a map of Hawkins. Red circles around what Steve assumed were the farms being threatened.

Nancy’s face twisted, “What’s up with this?” she gestured to Tommy and his chain clutched in his fist.

“He wants in,” Steve shrugged and stepped forward to look at the map between Hopper and Dustin, “Not like we couldn’t use the help.”

Nancy scowled, “We can manage.”

“Yeah,” Mike butted in.

Steve glared at her, “Let it go, Nance. He’s here and that’s it, please.” She looked at Johnathan but John looked at Tommy just as openly as his mother had.

“You know how to throw that?” he looked at the dark chain links.

Tommy nodded and pointed to the west circle, “That’s my farm. Well, my dad’s.” He looked sheepish, like he was admitting something.

“Cool,” Steve heard Will whisper.

Johnathan smiled more just as Nancy’s frown deepened, “Didn’t know you were in the lower levels like us.” Tommy frowned and Nancy scolded John with a slap to the arm. “It’s just cool is all,” he defended himself from her onslaught.

Tommy grew confused, “Cool?”

John nodded, “Tuff,” he grinned. Tommy smirked and eased down, comfortably joining Steve by his side.

“So do I get the backstory or what?” Everyone else looked at Hopper.

The man rolled his eyes but relented, “Keep up,” he pointed at Tommy gruffly. The boy nodded and Steve planted a grounding hand on his shoulder. “When Will went missing he was actually trapped in a different dimension. There’s El, who isn’t here right now, she was an experiment.” His voice with filled with distaste. “ She has powers, telekinesis. She’s resting right now so she can—“

“Which is stupid,” Mike snapped, “She’s not ready—“ Lucas and Dustin elbowed him to shut him up.

Hopper didn’t even look at the kids, “She’s getting ready to fight the bigger problem, the mindflayer. Something that likes possessing people. Watch out for that,” he tipped his hat back. “But there are big dogs from that other dimension sneaking in like your average coyote onto farms. So we have to go out and clean them out.” Steve eyed Tommy’s face which was stoney. Hopper turned back to the table and map when he fingered Tommy had at least taken all of what he said in through his ears to process eventually. “We’re hitting it by groups. Joyce and I will go to Merrill’s. Nancy, Johnathan, Will, and Mike are going to Tinnerman’s. Steve, Tommy, Dustin, and Lucas are at Hagan’s. Got that?” he looked around. When no one disagreed he backed away.

Steve took his bag off and set it on top of the map, “You still have that tire iron?” he asked Dustin as he took out his lighter.

“Yep,” the kid nodded, “Still behind the house, I’ll go get it,” he ran off.

Steve only had to look at Lucas for an answer, “Got my pockets full of rocks and marbles this time.”

Steve smiled small but assuring, “Good.”

Everyone walked off to retrieve their own weapons or start their own vehicles. Except Steve and Tommy. Tommy was pale and his eyes were greyish.

“Hey,” Steve rubbed a thumb across his freckled cheek, “What’s going on in your head?” he whispered.

Tommy looked up and took in a shaky breath, “I’m ready to kill some monsters?” The questioning tone didn’t surprise Steve, the words did though. He didn’t ask, didn’t want to over work Tommy’s mind already. Not when they still had a long night ahead.

===

The Hagan property was the smallest of the three Hawkins farms. Fencing behind them that was meant to keep cattle on grounds, then a big barn, then the Hagan house. But it wasn’t meant to be called “small” either. The cattle were safe in the barn as long as they all stayed attentive and ready to kill off any demodog invaders. Simple, all in a days work. But Tommy was shaking like a leaf and Steve heard rustling from their right.

He stepped ahead a few steps just as Dustin and Lucas yelled out at the shadow creeping out of the trees. Tommy cursed loudly, so much so Steve feared Tommy’s mother would wake from it all the way in the house. He swung his bat to stabilize himself and then went to town on the thing’s neck, back, and head. It went down quick and others started coming out more and more. Lucas slung-shot his own ammunition and Dustin kept them back with Steve’s lighter and a can of hairspray.

“Can you get that one, Tom?” he shouted over the growls of a new dog as one ran past him to the fence.

It was a pretty quick success all things considering. The carcasses laid around Steve in wide diameter, gunk sprung all over the grass and tree bark. But as silence carried no more sounds carried out from the darkness.

He faced the group, Dustin parking things back into Steve bag and pulling out water bottles. Lucas was trying to wipe the sweat from his face.

Then Steve caught sight of Tommy standing still. Too still. He panicked.

“Tom?” he whisper yelled as he ran up to him. Grabbed his arms and then his head, “Tommy, are you alright?” Tommy’s pale face reflected streaks of luminescent tracks in the moonlight. His eyes looked frozen wide. “Hey,” he wiped away the tears with his thumbs and made Tommy make eye contact. Which seems to blow him out of his stupor. He started breathing sporadically. Steve hugged him and started breathing in and out exaggeratedly. “Match me, Sweetheart,” he whispered. Breathed in and waited as Tommy matched it. Exhaled and patiently listened.

By the time Tommy was lax against him, exhausted and adrenaline all gone, Steve had decided they were done. He snapped his fingers to grab Lucas and Dustin’s attention.

“Yo, call Hopper and see what they’re up to, please,” he threw one of Tommy’s arms over his shoulders. Started leading them back to his car a little ways away. Tommy wouldn’t speak, Steve had the mind to assume he was in shock. Knew the feeling himself. But the amount Tommy was still partially immobile on his own was concerning. “Can you signal to me how your feeling, Tommy? What can I do for you?” he asked as he opened the car door and worked his boyfriend into the passenger seat. He knelt on the wet road, his jeans getting damp at the knees.

Tommy finally made eye contact on his own and pressed his lips together, “That was scary.” Steve nodded understandingly. Tommy continued, “This is fucked,” he sat back and forcibly enclosed Steve hand in between his own. Steve distantly heard Dustin yapping to someone on the walkie talkie. “How do you all do it?” he asked exasperatedly. He deflated and shook his head, lost, “How do you do it all? You were amazing back there, didn’t hesitate or flinch.”

Steve smiled and leaned up to give Tommy a kiss to the cheek, “No one is going to be upset with you Tommy. We don’t even have to mention it. The important thing is,” he stepped back, “That we’re all safe and the dogs are done with.”

“But—“

“We won’t hold it against you,” he promised and Tommy closed his mouth slowly. Nodding in agreement a little reluctantly.

Dustin was messing with the dials on the walkie when he left Tommy there, “I’m gonna go clean the mess up, you two get in the car and wait.

Lucas stepped up though, “I’ll help.” Steve gave him a look but he persisted, “Please?”

He rolled his eyes, “I guess you’d be better help than Dustin.”

“Hey!” the other scolded.

Lucas flicked him, “Please, you gag every time the goo gets on you.”

“I wonder why!” Dustin called back as he got into the car with Tommy.

===

It was a few weeks later and Tommy was a little more comfortable in the Party and their occasional missions to take out other dimensional monsters. Tommy was good with the chain when he wasn’t completely petrified. Caught and wrangled multiple dogs out of the way on occasions. Sure he stopped out a few time but they didn’t fight him about it. Knew he knew what he couldn’t handle.

He was teaching Will a thing or two now. They each sat on logs in the Byers’ backyard with ropes in their hands and on their laps. Steve watched as he leaned against the back door doorframe with Joyce. Johnathan had tried to follow along but had quickly knotted his bad. Had encouraged them both instead as Tommy directed Will step by step.

Then, Steve joined them as they worked on tossing and capturing low tree branches. Tommy lassoed them all and Steve got some. But Will grew his skills fast apparently because he was right behind Tommy, grasping all the practicing targets with concentrated ease.

Tommy fist bumped the kid and Steve used his height to pull the rope back down, “Good job, Byers!”

“I was actually good at it,” Will beamed proudly. Tommy slung an arm over Wills shoulders and headed towards the house as Joyce called for dinner.

“You know, you should come take Steve’s place on the farm over the summer.” Will bounced on the souls of his feet a bit at the excitement and giggled when Steve scoffed dramatically.

“I’m just rusty.”

Tommy chuckled, “Come on, Byers One and Byers Two, let’s leave the Rich Boy to clean up.” Will laughed and followed him loyally.

Johnathan stood with a definite nod, “Agreed.” Steve stopped to watch them race to the house like they were all young boys.

Tommy fit in just fine.

#steve harrington #tommy hagan #stommy #stranger things #will byers #jim hopper #johnathan byers #i’ll edit this more later but here!#hope it’s alright. i was unsure on how to end it but i didn’t want to keep you waiting even longer #:) <3

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otherworldly-healer · 3 years

Text

Challenge Part 1 [Preparation for Battle, Raine & Mariela] [~2530 Words]

It was well after dark at Sunlight’s Canopy. Oil lamps scattered around the room cast an eerie orange glow across the walls. Raine had called in a favor. She sat at a table alone, staring out onto the streets of Golden while she waited for the owner of the shop to enter the room. The half elf was listless. She was feeling so many things at the moment that her emotions sort of just…shut down on her. Clouds overtook the city that night, and rain thrummed on the window as her coffee grew cold on the table in front of her. A storm again, huh? Raine was transported back to that night when the full moon rose above stone plinths, changing her life forever. She could feel a chill run up her spine.

It started on the Spirale University campus. She overheard a group of students whispering rumors about two people trapped out in The Mistwood trying to leave the city. At first she thought it was just another newcomer to the city who got lost on their way exploring. It happened often enough. It wasn’t that strange. They would learn soon enough that in walking past the edge of the barrier that there was no escape. But… the rumors didn’t stop there.

As she was making her way across campus later that day she overheard more chatter. One of the two people was supposedly an elven woman with long silver hair, wearing a coat of green cloth. The other was a human man with light-brown hair. They had been seen traveling the solitary stretch of road between Cotes and The Mistwood, then turning into the woods together. There were too many coincidences there to make her feel comfortable. If it was them… they would never make it out alive. Her mother couldn’t fight. Her father was only one man, and while he knew useful medical skills and his way around a sword, in the past he always had a company with him in the Knights.

After Grimm had told her that the Stars had his son, it wasn’t unthinkable that they had Raine’s parents as well. Just like when she had to protect a younger version of herself and Genis, it was almost as if the Stars had set that up as a practice for this main event. They were toying with her again. She had gotten too comfortable here. She had to be reminded never to let down her guard. How could she catch herself slipping like that? That’s right…no place was ever safe for very long for the Sages. Trouble followed them wherever they went. As they could always count on the dawn, they could also anticipate dusk. For Raine, she never knew what dangers lurked there, but she always knew that it was inevitable that in time some monster would rear its head.

“Heeey. Sorry it took so long. I wish I could do more for you but…this is all I’ve got to spare right now.” Mariela walked in from the back of the apothecary, lugging a box filled with potion vials and round capsules.

“No, it’s fine. I know we’ve all been weakened here. Any help is appreciated but…I don’t mean to be a bother. You can’t find them, can you? With your attachment to the ley line?” The shopkeeper frowns and sits down across from the professor.

“I’ve never met them, so I’ve never come across their spiritual energy. I could probably find you like that if you were ever in danger but…not a stranger. On a night like this, I went out into the rain and with all the magical energy I could muster I followed my friend Caroline. It took everything I had. Even if I had met these travelers everyone’s talking about, the last time I tried to find someone like that, my soul almost got taken into the ley line for good.”

“Ah…r-right. I apologize. I didn’t wish to ask too much of you.” So, because Mariela was attuned with this ley line she could also distinguish one person’s presence from another. She’d have to ask her more about this in the future. It wasn’t exactly like a mana signature, but something similar at least.

“Naw, it’s alright. I get it. When Carol was missing I…I felt so scared. I can’t fight, so all I could do was lead other people to the place she was to protect them.”

Raine sighed, taking a moment to sip at her coffee so she had time to collect herself and think. Honestly... Raine could relate to what she was saying.

“Well. Your skills are impressive, and more than useful to others. Thank you again for meeting me here tonight. So, tell me a little more about these.”

The alchemist picks a potion vial out of the box, shaking it gently so that the foggy white particulate swirled in the liquid. Raine recognized this one. It was some sort of Monster Warding potion. Mariela had mentioned before that this kept monsters away, but she had yet to explain exactly how it worked. She asked now for some clarification.

“Alright, so you remember this one. It’s made from the same herbs that grow around the gutters on the roof. I can’t guarantee that they’ll work on every monster. After a certain level monsters become too strong to be affected by them. In my world, monsters all had a ranking system. D-ranked monsters were usually the weakest of them and they were found on the first levels of the Labyrinth. C ranks were stronger than those, then B, then A, and the strongest of all monsters would be classified as S rank. The same went for people. Anywho, the monster warding potions usually work for monsters up to B rank, but it depends. Dog monsters like wolves are especially sensitive to it. The smell it gives off will make them turn and run. If they’re too high of a level, you can at least throw it at a certain spot to guide them into groups so they’re easier to hit. That’s what we did with the orc raids every year.”

“So these potions won’t normally hurt a monster?”

“Nah. Not usually. It makes them really uncomfortable and might give some minor burns, but usually it’s just a deterrent.”

“Good to know. So then…these bombs.”

“Oh yup yup. This stays between you and me though. My shop has a strict policy that I don’t like selling anything that could be used to hurt other people. I trust you, but in the wrong hands…”

“I promise I won’t tell a soul.”

“Pheeeew. Thought so. I don’t sell poisons either for the same reason, even if I can make them. It’s just not moral to do it. So, you know about these flash bombs.” The shopkeep pulls out a bright yellow sphere. “They emit a bright light. Some monsters might be scared of light so it’s worth a try, but you’re gonna want to warn anyone else that you’re about to use one so you don’t get disoriented.”

“Then…the red ones.”

“Right-o. Those are actually bombs that cause explosions. Not big ones, when we were fighting the Labyrinth even kids used those, but they’ll definitely cause an injury. Be reeeeally careful with those. I’d suggest throwing them at the feet of a monster to demobilize them. Have you ever handled explosives before?”

“My light magic acts in a similar way and as for explosives…well. I know the dangers of them. I have never had handheld ones, but I have used them before.” At the professor’s answer, the alchemist had a concerned look on her face. Raine quickly followed up with, “Don’t worry Mariela. I’m not reckless. I like to make tactical plans before walking into danger if I can help it.”

Mariela nods. “These ones are made from incendiary plants. Less chance for collateral damage because there’s no shrapnel. And here.” The girl removes a leather belt with a number of pouches around it from around her waist, handing it over to Raine. “Carry it all with this. I really hope you find what you’re looking for out there. Be safe.”

“Thanks Mariela. I will certainly try to be.”

The alchemist put the lid back on the box and handed them over to the half elf. Raine scowled as she drew closer to the doorway, looking out to see that the rain had only started pelting the pavement with even more fury. The alchemist hopped up from her seat and peered out into the city streets herself. They both lived in this ward. She couldn’t just let her customer walk back home without at least a hood on.

“Wait up Raine! Let me just clean up and I’ll walk you right on home. I’m positive I’ve got a big umbrella here somewhere. We’re going the same direction anyway.”

“That would be wonderful, thank you.”

Mariela would throw the remains of the professor’s coffee in the sink and toss the container in the garbage. It was unlike Raine to clean up, but looking at her now, she was definitely out of it. She just stood under the awning in front of the shop and kept on staring out into the night, lost in her thoughts. Mariela looked around and finally found her umbrella, tucked into a corner in the living room. Then she locked up the door into the house and walked out the front door of the shop to lock that one as well. Then she began opening up the umbrella for both her and the half elf. It was a quiet walk home. Only the sounds of cars sloshing through puddles and their shoes smacking the pavement would be heard between them. It was scary, almost, to see a time when the professor was not excitedly chattering about her newest discovery.

After walking Raine to her doorstep, Mariela pulled a healing potion out of her pocket and handed it to the professor. She had already paid for the box in her hands, but being a healer herself she had figured that she could handle any injuries herself. Mariela told her that this one was on the house, and that you could never be too safe. The professor nodded and took the potion from her, unable to speak for a moment. She bowed her head slightly and thanked the girl again for her generosity, placing the potion in her own pocket. Mariela wished her luck and began walking down the street to her own building. Raine unlocked the door behind her and walked across the threshold, making her way upstairs to get to her apartment.

The room was quiet except for the usual sounds of the city that got filtered to the back of her mind. After taking off her shoes and hanging up her coat, Raine immediately headed for her room. She knew that she couldn’t do this alone. She wished she was more certain whether or not she was actually chasing phantoms but…she had made up her mind. She needed to know. If it was her parents after all, her father was there. That meant her parents were taken from a time before Kloitz had passed. That meant in turn that her mother had yet to lose her faculties. She could actually speak to them and get the answers that she desperately wanted to hear after so many years.

Above all…they didn’t regret having her, did they? Even though she was a half-elf, born to be scorned and despised. She was the reason they were on the run for so long. If the Imperial Research Academy hadn’t heard of her existence they would not have had to give up everything. It was her fault, wasn’t it? Surely, Virginia and Kloitz would have always been ostracized for finding love with one another, but if the siblings were never born perhaps they could have lived in Heimdall forever. Her father would still be alive if they were never chased out.

No. She would no longer think like that. If her Journey taught her anything, it was that she had the right to live regardless of her race. She would make her own place in the world...and here in Spirale...she didn’t even have to steal that place by pretending she was something she was not. People looked up to her. They accepted her, and cared for her, as hard as it was to believe most of the time. Her life was important.

What would happen, exactly, if those two people in the woods were her parents after all? After so many years of feeling abandoned and rejected, did she want an apology from them? Did she just want to be left alone so that she might move on—scars buried deep but never quite healed? Did...any of it even matter anymore? She no longer had to hide who she was. For the first time in so long she could see happier days ahead. Logically she knew it was time to stop living in the past. Whatever she chose, it seems that she would have to make the decision quickly upon seeing them.

…If it really was them.

She wasn’t strong. Especially here in Spirale. She was a healer and a mage. Then again Virginia’s words ran circles in her mind. “Please forgive your powerless mother”. Even if Raine had some magical ability she felt she was nearly powerless, just like her mother had felt. But wait…that wasn’t entirely true was it? Raine had been through hell and back. Even when it felt like there was no hope, and life had kicked her down she changed her plans and found a way to survive on her own. Even if her magic wasn’t powerful, she was strong. She was tenacious. She would never give up fighting to find safety and belonging for her family. Above all she was crafty. She had to believe if there were monsters out in those woods, she would do as she always did and claw her way out of danger by the skin of her teeth.

Raine lay on her bed and took out her phone, staring at the list of contacts. In the past Raine had been too stubborn to ask for help. She believed that she had to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders because the only person she could rely on was herself. But now…things were different weren’t they? People she held dear knew who she was. They knew of her struggles to find a place where she belonged, and they began to welcome her with open arms. So…would it not cause undue worry to march into the woods by herself, just like when she went off on her own to find the Otherworldly Gate? Genis would be so upset if she did. Raine needed to ask for help, just this once. So… she opened her messages, hoping it was not too late to be bothering others, and called in a few favors to her friends and loved ones.

#isola challenge #challenge pt 1 #releases part 1 into the wind and flees

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