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with-love-from-hell · 1 year

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Head-Empty Headcanons

Things they say, think, and do that prove they are a bit air-headed.

Genre: Headcanons, Comedy

Characters featured: All Obey Me! Characters (yes, even the new ones!)

Whenever Mc is mentioned its unrelated to their gender!

CW: swearing!

A/N: The brain rot is real this morning, and I haven’t done anything super silly in awhile, so here!

Belphegor

The weirdest shit always comes out of his mouth when he’s half awake.

Will ask the most ridiculous questions when he’s in between naps or when he’s just woken up because his brain is on autopilot, like along the lines of “Do you think pigeons have feelings?”

Does not look when he crosses the street.

Will literally ask what you said after being annoyed that you asked if he was listening.

Has drank water while laying down and choked himself.

Beelzebub

3 balls bopping around his head at all times are Food, Workout, and MC like a game of Pong

Blinks one eye at a time. It’s subtle but he totally does it.

Has eaten the fortune out of a fortune cookie because he thought that was part of the process of making the fortune come true.

When told by MC he had to rinse rice before cooking it he asked if he needed to use soap.

Has eaten whole, raw, potatoes because he thought it would give him protein like eating raw eggs would.

Asmodeus

He’s pretty; he doesn’t have to be smart.

Once stared frustratingly in the mirror for 15 minutes trying to figure out why the phrase written on his shirt was backwards.

The first time he dyed his hair, he got mad that it didn’t grow the same color out of his scalp.

Forgets that he owns something and will by numerous duplicates.

1000% has fallen for MLM scams

Satan

No thought only cat.

You need to watch him like a toddler if you take him to the zoo. He will try to jump into every big cat enclosure.

Has started fires in his room multiple times because he put candles on top of his books (Seriously dude your room is a fire hazard) but is still clueless as to how it happened.

The first time he saw a racoon he thought it was a rare breed of cat and tried to snuggle it.

Leviathan

Somebody take his screens away.

Has 100% tried to “Back Space” words when writing physically with pen and paper.

More than once has screamed at a game system for not working when he had just not realized that it was unplugged.

Has definitely run into walls after sitting 2 feet away from his giant TV like a 3 year old.

Has completely ignored and walked away from people because he is too busy creating a theme music for himself as he’s doing something that he perceives as cool.

Mammon

I think I could never run of ideas for how airheaded this man is, but I’ll go for the abstract ones since there are many that are obvious.

One of those dudes who thinks pee comes out of the vagina.

Definitely goes down existential rabbit holes because of questions like “Is cereal a soup” or “is a hotdog a sandwich”

Will literally believe anything you tell him if you say it with enough sincerity- even if it’s the most ridiculous thing you could think of.

100% believes that horror movies like Friday the 13th are based on true events and is convinced that most humans die by serial killers

Lucifer

This man has absolutely done the dumbest shit when he is sleep deprived.

Will lose things that he is holding in his hands as he’s using them- often it’s his pen or his phone.

has drank scalding hot coffee because he forgot it was too hot to drink.

Leaves things in the oven and microwave all the time. Usually Beel finds it and eats it, and he’s none the wiser.

Talks to himself all the time, usually giving reminders to do things or a grocery list, but also will just narrate things.

Literally a Golden Retriever.

Diavolo

Holds up his his fingers in an L shape to determine right from left- which never works because he forgets which way an L is supposed to go.

Will believe pretty much anything you tell him about the human world if you say it with enough conviction.

Constantly doing the most ridiculous things without thinking of the consequences- often times leaving Lucifer or Barbatos to clean up his mess.

Constantly bothers Mc, Lucifer, and Barbatos when they’re busy- even after just being scolded for being a distraction- because he forgets that they’re doing something and wanted to show them something cool

Barbatos

He’s probably the least ditzy, but even he has his moments.

Walks into the kitchen and forgets why he was going in there. All the time.

Accidentally goes through all of the Little D’s names before getting the right one- even if he had JUST done the same thing for a different little D

Will step out the door to go somewhere with Lord Diavolo and immediately wonder if he left the Stove on. He will go check, and still wonder if it’s on 5 hours later.

Mephistopheles

Simp! Simp alert!

Will do anything you tell him if you said “Well, I guess I could go ask Lucifer to do it...” even if its embarrassing or flat-out dangerous lol

Diavolo occupies his brain at all times so he’s often distracted by intense pining for their “friendship” that was totally not a one-way crush. (go listen to “When Somebody Loved Me” from Toy Story 2 lol)

One of those “Um AcTUaLly” bros who is always wrong about the thing they’re correcting you on to an absurd degree.

Somebody go teach grandpa how to use a computer.

Simeon

Has definitely given his computer a virus by clicking a popup ad, and also fell for the “Nigerian Prince” emails

“Do you think someone would just go on the internet and tell lies?”

No seriously he will see some wild conspiracy on Devilgram or Devilbook and be convinced it is real. Lord help him.

Definitely thinks Boomer memes are funny. Send him a minion, he will laugh his ass off.

Raphael

Elevator music playing in his brain at all times.

Immediately choses violence as an option every time no matter the circumstances and this is quite literally CANON.

Is always the last to know some secret that isn’t really a secret and is really obvious.

Will test the sharpness of his spears by jamming them into the ground, and then get mad when he cant yank them back up.

Luke

Just a poor child trying his best. Someone teach him.

Probably didn’t know what a chihuahua was when someone first compared him to one but was too embarrassed to admit he didn’t know so he just like. Went with it. Until he found out they are a tiny yippy dog- then he got angy.

Absolutely believes that babies come from the Stork.

Thought the “PG” movie rating meant “Pretty Good.”

Solomon

His cooking cant be that bad...can it?

Will throw quite literally anything into a pot when cooking, even if it doesn’t make sense to do so, because he likes to “experiment”

The first time he sees a fidget spinner he loses his fucking mind. “What is this? It’s spinning! I am in pure bliss!”

Has definitely blown up a classroom at RAD because he snuck in a potion to test out and accidentally dropped it.

Has definitely said some really outdated cringy slang. “Tubular!” “Oh man, so grody!”

Thirteen

Conspiracy theorist- for sure.

Didn’t believe that Belphie and Beel were twins because they didn’t look alike (she did not know fraternal twins were a thing).

Is convinced that Solomon is an alien.

Mispronounces words all the time because she rarely talks to others until the exchange program and primarily sees things written (e.g. Fragile as “Fra-gee-lay” and Bologna as “Bow-log-nah”)

Does not test her traps before using them, and gets mad when they don’t work.

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elichisstuff · 4 years

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*The brothers (except Levi) chilling in the leaving room*

*MC entering with a frown*

Mammon: What's up with ya?

Beel: What's wrong MC? *continue eating*

Asmo: *not looking up from his DDD* you know you'll easily get wrinkles if you do that honey~

MC: *sighs and sits beside Mammon* I decided to finish an anime that my friend recommended me few years ago

Satan: *looking up from his book* wait you watch anime?

Levi: *bursting in and leaning close to MC * YOU WERE WATCHING ANIME???

Belphie: so noisy.... *leaves*

MC: *leans back in surprise* Y-yeah I did

Mammon: *pushes Levi* Oi back off! Ya too close!

Levi: *backs off* whatever *takes a seat* So MC, what's that anime called?

MC: It's called Uta no Prince Sama

Levi: *leaning back at his seat* Never heard of that anime before

MC: Well duh it's targeted at girls, though, I've watched 4 or 5 episodes of it few years ago, but I forgot why I stopped watching it.... *frowns and crosses her arms* until now...

Levi: *in shock* W-why did you stopped there???

Mammon: yeah why?

MC: Because...

Mammon and Levi: *leans closer*

Asmo, Satan, Beel and Lucifer: *stares from their seats*

Belphie: *head poking out of the door*

MC: *in tears* B-because....

The brothers: is she gonna cry???

MC: *dramatic fake cries* BECAUSE THAT LUCKY BITCH NANAMI IS SURROUNDED BY SEVEN HOT BOYS!!!

Brothers:..... THATS IT????

*Belphie quickly ended up joining back in and standing behind the couch*

Mammon: Oi MC! Ya literally are surrounded by SEVEN hot guys right now! *wavering his hands*

Asmo: *quickly stands* Yeah! But technically saying, I'M the hottest one here right~?

Others: Shut up Asmodeus!

Asmo: HMPH! *sits back down*

Lucifer: *standing beside MC's seat* what makes you attracted to them, may I ask?

Levi: *speaks up* Other than them being 2D of course!

MC: Well first THAT, yes and they can sing

Belphie: We can sing if you want us to

Other brothers: *nods in agreement*

MC: *serious*... IN harmony

Brothers:.... Fair point

MC: *under her breath* Lucky bitch got all the beauties around her...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lol I literally had this scenario in my head cause I just started playing Utapri yesterday and I thought of finishing the anime back in 2015 and thought to myself, why did I stopped watching it....?

THATS THE REASON... I can't stop getting jealous of that girl Nanami 🤦🏻‍♀️

Damn, 13 year old me was already a jealous ass bitch, 5 years later and still am

Anyways, someone drew a Uta no Prince Sama x Obey Me! Crossover on Twitter 🤩

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