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radramblog · 3 years

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Radiohead Retrospective Part 4: We’ve got heads on sticks

Your name is Thom Yorke. You’ve just released what is considered one of the best albums of the 90s, if not of all time, and you’ve achieved a level of fame that at least one band member considers akin to the Beatles. Through the release of OK Computer, you’ve proven that even if people are pretty much over Oasis at this point, British rock bands still rule the airwaves. You’re also stressed the fuck out over just about all of this, and having a very hard time accustoming to the life of a celebrity- let alone the usual mental health issues.

What will you do?

Apparently, the answer was to write the fourth album to be as far away from the previous few as possible, seeking influence from IDM groups like Aphex Twin, jazz stuff, and just some bizarro instruments and experimentation and leaving a lot of the “rock” stuff behind. The primary genre listed for Kid A is usually Electronica or Ambient, with various off-kilter rock subgenres lagging behind, crying “you’re still gonna do guitars and stuff, right?”

Well…not as much anymore. But this era of Radiohead, this career-suicidal swerve, still proved monumentally successful, and showed that the band still had it, and that sometimes artistic risks do pay dividends.

A side note: I usually link music videos for the tracks I discuss as part of each post, as you’ll have seen in previous parts of this series. Kid A, however, doesn’t have any singles, and it sure doesn’t have any music videos. So…maybe just listen yourself. I’m probably in over my head here anyway.

I think the first 5 notes of Everything In Its Right Place are some of the most iconic in all of music.

Some personal background- Kid A was the first Radiohead I ever listened to. A particular cool and good mate of mine was a fan in high school, but I’d never listened to them at all, and I trusted his opinion musically, so I went to buy one of their CDs the next time I was at the shop. And for whatever reason, the cheapest one was Kid A at 10 bucks, and I didn’t want to gamble more than that, so that’s the one I got.

So the opening notes of Everything In Its Right Place were the first Radiohead I ever heard. And considering how much I obsessed over this band, in high school and beyond, it’s no surprise that this song is one of my favourites.

Not only did this song introduce me to Radiohead, it was effectively a gateway track for electronic music in general. This was the early 10s, and the majority of what I knew as electronic stuff was the EDM that was drowning the airwaves at the time. I hated that stuff out of principle, because being a hipster like that was definitely a personality. I don’t think I would ever have gotten into Vaporwave, into IDM, or into any electronic music the way I eventually would were it not for Everything In Its Right Place.

Now that I’ve spent 250 words talking about myself and not the actual song, we should probably stop that. Everything In Its Right Place is defined by this steady build of layering vocals and effects onto the relatively calm synth line, distorted vocals and word salad lyrics and manipulated noises growing and getting more chaotic before it just stops- the vocals fade out, the effects drop, and you’re left with the synth line- except it’s been slowly changing itself the whole time, and you don’t realise because you’ve been distracted by everything else at the same time.

It’s worth noting (and I don’t know if this was the case with OK Computer, because I don’t have an original copy of that one) that this was an album without liner notes, without the lyrics in the cover booklet. But at least in this case, the lyrics don’t matter as much as the v i b e. At least, that’s what I think.

On the topic of unintelligible lyrics, Kid A has a title track! I believe literally two Radiohead albums do this, the other being The Bends (though Hail to the Thief and In Rainbows do appear as lyrics). The song itself is an ambient, quiet piece that feels something like a twisted nursery tune- incredibly affected vocals, a syncopated (?) percussion, and a synth (I think???) that…I don’t know how to describe it, but it feels nursery-rhyme-y. If you’ve heard this song a few times, or you know what to listen for, you can piece together the lyrics somewhat- and they are, frankly, kind of unsettling. What is standing in the shadows at the end of your bed, can it please leave? And imagery of the Pied Piper is always either extremely silly or extremely unnerving, with this clearly leaning towards the latter. There’s a lot going on here- especially for a track most probably wouldn’t listen to outside the context of the full album. I know I generally don’t- not the kind of thing I generally am in the mood for.

We’re at 850+ words, and we’re only up to The National Anthem? Fuuuuck. Well, anyone who wasn’t on board the IDM train can at least appreciate this one more, it’s got an actual bassline. A killer one, at that, that drives the whole track. Well, you know, that and the B R A S S. Seriously, it sounds like they invited a marching band to this bad boy. The combination ends up sounding mostly like controlled chaos, a jazz band traffic jam wound together by that B A S S. But the bass can’t hold it forever, and eventually that shit breaks free and just, it just honks all over the place.

I’m frustratingly running out of things to say about this song I really like, as opposed to the other songs I really liked. Unfortunately, ya boi forgot to take his neurotypicalification pills today, and so I’m getting very distracted. Hopefully, that slightly unhinged nature suits the album somewhat.

The next song, How To Disappear Completely, is a Big Mood with a fun story attached. The main lyrics- I’m not here, this isn’t happening- were allegedly something none other than Michael Stipe from R.E.M. told Thom to help him deal with that massive stage fright that came with Getting Big. Fun trivia aside, this song is gorgeous, luscious with massive strings, an acoustic bend, aethereal vocals, and a background drone running through the thing that makes sure your hair is always a little on end through the thing. It’s a song whose lyrics are an attempt to escape anxiety, whose instrumentation serves more to reinforce it- a calm, melodic piece that builds into nervous swells and threatening strings. A song about fighting your fear, and losing.

Fuck me it’s a bit depressing isn’t it. It’s potentially the most emotionally revealing song the album has- a lot of the lyricism on other tracks is more metaphorical, or subtle, but the meaning in How To Disappear Completely is evident even just from the title. You get lost in the strings and they go from calming, to imposing, to downright menacing (and then back again) in the song’s final minute.

Treefingers, on the other hand, has a lot less to say, and by that I mean it’s an instrumental. A very atmospheric, ambient one, and thereby one I don’t have a lot to say about. I’m not sure I’m particularly good at commenting on regular music, but this kinda thing is a whole different animal. I have no idea how to interact with discussing this. I like it? I will say, that one note right at the end, that echoes for a bit, the one piece of clarity in this muddled, reverbed sphere, feels especially poignant, for reasons I cannot describe.

We go from ambient instrumental to arguable the most rock-song-like track on this album, Optimistic, certified banger that it is. Some might argue that it doesn’t fit here, but like, did they even hear the lyrics? The bridge? It more that deserves its place on one of the best albums around. The little way the guitar scales up during the chorus is excellent, the proggy drums and riffs are glorious, it’s just a very good rock song.

Also this is the first song with the lyric “dinosaurs roaming the earth”, which, aside from being a bit of a non-sequitur, would return two albums later. And I’m really looking forward to that one.

In Limbo is a song I kind of always forget exists until I hear it again. It’s antimemetic, the way the song goes slipping from my mind until I hear those opening notes again. I’m going to be honest, it’s probably because it’s also the most mid song on the album. Far from bad, but it isn’t doing anything that How to Disappear Completely or Optimistic aren’t doing better. If I had to remove any track from this album, it might be this one?

Watch me get fucking lynched from the fandom for that one, if I ever post this to r/Radiohead or whatever. Which I might, though as much as I’d like more people to read my things I’m also extremely anxious about the potential response. Like the album I’m discussing today, I’m terrified of fame.

Incidentally, In Limbo is also the shortest track on the album (Treefingers beats it by 11 seconds), though this isn’t initially obvious online at least, because people keep messing with Motion Picture Soundtrack. But we’re not there yet, hang on.

We go from the forgettable (to me) In Limbo to the utterly mesmerizing Idioteque. Anxious but danceable, confusing but emotive, messy but tightly controlled. I love this fucking song to death. The reason I got the particular Radiohead poster that I did was because it has lyrics from this on it.

I’ve heard that lyrics for this album were largely pulled from a hat, and nowhere is that more clear than here (or maybe Everything In Its Right Place). Despite this, there’s a pretty clear theme in them, a continuation of some of the themes of this and the last albums. A condemnation of wealth and cowardice in the face of ecological disaster. In the form of an apocalypse disco.

What a lot of people don’t know about this track is that it actually samples an extremely old electronic music piece- one written in 1973, on a particularly old computer. The track, mild und leise, is a very interesting track considering its age- I’m reminded of Selected Ambient Works by Aphex Twin- not so much musically, but about how that reason was as influential as it was because it was the first time songs had sounded like that, because it was the first time songs could sound like that- I suppose it’s somewhat similar in that way, if older. These pieces and their composers inexorably linked by the allure of technology, and how that could be used to define new eras in music history- in Radiohead’s case, it certainly defined the next few albums in their lifespan.

Jesus mild und leise is long, it’s still going as I write this. I need to get back to Kid A, man!

Idioteque leads directly into Morning Bell, admittedly another less memorable song. Largely percussion lead, plenty of falsetto, and with a very unsubtle theme if you listen to the lyrics. I recall seeing someone saying that “cut the kids in half” was a really surprising and spooky line, and, yeah, sure, it sort of is, but it’s only particularly bad if you don’t pay attention for the rest of it. It’s about divorce, dude, it’s not subtle.

Or apparently not, according to one interview, but Thom said the interpretation isn’t invalid, so haha still winning baybeeeee.

I think the only part of this I really can’t do without is the outro, because the last minute and a half of this song is really cool. The mumbled lyrics go really well with the rising percussion and eerie effects that end the track.

Our final song is Motion Picture Soundtrack, or, Exit Music (for Walt Disney’s Depression Nap). This and Street Spirit I think are what really cement Radiohead’s reputation for brutal closers, both of them being tragic but hauntingly beautiful in different ways. In this case, it’s the instrumentation- glittering harps attempting the echo 50s Disney. There’s actually a version of this song from the OK Computer era with extremely different instrumentation, piano rather than organ, and no harps (and a third verse that is utterly brutal). Regardless, this is the song they chose to close the apocalypse that Kid A is on- the final lyric being “I will see you in the next life”, as the glittering echoes into the night. Poignant and tragic, but a little hopeful- the next life hopefully won’t have the struggles and pain of this one.

And then, of course, there’s the hidden track. Nicknamed Genchildren by some (that’s just the username of the dude who uploaded it to Napster back in the day), officially known as Untitled, and the true closer to the album. With Spotify slapping it right at the end of Motion Picture Soundtrack, it’s not clear the true nature of this song- it’s actually hidden on the original album, after several minutes of silence, just long enough that you’ve forgotten you left the player running (or you’re still crying from Motion Picture Soundtrack). I don’t think there’s a real word for what this sounds like other than heavenly, and incredibly brief piece I’ve heard compared to the pearly gates. After all, if we end on “I will see you in the next life”, then what can this be but that?

Thus closes Kid A, a gorgeous and powerful album, yet an insane swerve for any rock band to pull, not just Radiohead. A bold strategy, and yet it paid off for them- Kid A would not only be massively influential, it was also massively successful both critically and commercially- but not to the standard of OK Computer before it. But they obviously weren’t trying to do OK Computer part 2, just as that album was deliberately not The Bends part 2.

Kid A would pretty much get a Part 2, though, less than a year later. And it’s that album we’ll be discussing next week, obviously. Until then.

#ramble #music #radiohead #kid a #idm #idm has to be the most pretentious acronym on the planet

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jonismitchell · 4 years

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FOLKLORE THIRD LISTEN NOTES

the 1

how awesome is it to have been right about this song being about the one who got away?

it sets up a very romantic theme for the album and i don’t know how to explain it

i really love this production it’s very dreamy and tailored (don’t make the pun) to my interests

the verses on this song and the imagery they evoke are perfect god

the way this feels so hard feelings esque… the bus line and yeah

can we discuss “the greatest loves of all time are over now”

i think the only opener that beats this for me is state of grace?

persist and resist the temptation…

okay the more i listen to this the more i’m convinced it’s taylor reflecting on everything that happened in this album years later and reminiscing one day (don’t make the pun)

her vocals on this are so soothing i don’t know how to explain it

cardigan

i was really afraid i wouldn’t like this because of the title but i love it

the imagery really reminds me of poetry can we have folklore poems

i think it’s the chorus (starts with dancing in your levi’s) that i really adore

a friend to all is a friend to none taylor swift said if you are neutral in situations of injustice you have taken the side of the oppressor (no joke this is what i thought of the first time)

“heartbeat on the high line once in twenty lifetimes” might be my favourite lyric

the music video says so much about the album as a whole in terms of the pain

TO KISS IN CARS AND DOWNTOWN BARS WAS ALL WE NEEDED??? excuse me that’s literally a perfect lyric

the train comment this has such a gothic romance feel to it and i love the line peter losing wendy

when you are young they assume you know nothing maybe that’s my favourite lyric

CAUSE I KNEW EVERYTHING WHEN I WAS YOUNG no one talk to me

the front porch line has possible parallels to mad woman?

okay but if this isn’t narrated by betty i’ll eat my own foot

i feel like the hook has real potential to be cheesy / childish but she avoids it so well bless

also the production on this song? a literal dream. she picked the style of production i like best i swear to god thank you miss swift

the last great american dynasty

the beginning of this sounds a bit like 929 to me, but it’s very unique from the first two songs on the album and i like it a lot

okay but the storytelling in this first part of this song is unparalleled

she sounds like the town gossip and you know what? i love it

this is also a really dance-able song to me

blaming the woman… how victorian esque

the chorus is flawless from the lyrics to the vocals to the beat i really love that beat! is that a drum i don’t know music

taylor swift said bitch good for her

the way she says “boys” is really neat

“and losing on card game bets” vs “back when we were card sharks playing games i thought you were leading me on” literally no one is allowed to look at me

again i was dancing to this hard on the first listen because it’s amazing and i’m also seeing the lucky one / starlight vibes but it’s better than both those songs? how does she do it

AND THEN IT WAS BOUGHT BY ME??? i lost my mind?? also this reinforces my water as authenticity theory because she references midnight sea whatever i’ll expand later

i had a marvelous time ruining everything,,, maybe she’s the narrator maybe she’s betty like elizabeth taylor burton to this taylor,,,

her voice in this song is seriously amazing

exile ft. bon iver

this feels like a natural sequel to the last time but it has huge getaway car vibes thematically

okay a lot of people have said this is a haylor song but i see it as taylor’s evelyn hugo fanfiction and you can’t change my mind on that

she put a whole man on this song and it’s still super gay

also i don’t mind bon iver’s voice as much as gary lightbody but still gah (also i had no idea who he was before this album that’s on being born in 2005

)i think i’ve seen this film before but i didn’t like the ending… don’t know why this line hits so hard but it literally does no one touch me

the ooh vocalizations are really cool i am again obsessed with the production

god i just love the lyrics on this so much can you guys believe how amazing

i just want to discuss how this entire thing is evelyn hugo fanfictionso i’m leaving out the side door is thematically important to the album i don’t know how to explain this right now but i’m sure i’m right about this

walked a very thin line vs literally all of mirrorball

i gave so many signs no one touch me! we only know the version of someone they have chosen to show us! there will be no more explanation there will just be reputation

the homeland defending line is amazing i can’t get myself together apparently“i’ve seen this film before so i’m leaving out the side door” maybe the best lyric

the outro for this song is literally flawless i just want to ask taylor what was going through her mind when she made this album please

this song is so sad i don’t even want to discuss it i just want to cry

my tears ricochet

love her getting some sat vocab in spelling really is fun

the intro for this song is so pretty i love

if i’m on fire you’ll be made of ashes too vs the room is on fire invisible smoke

when i said taylor was painting herself as one of the heroes that die all alone i wasn’t kidding!

the way she says loved on this song is really appealing to me

this being the track five makes me super emotional i love this song

i didn’t have it in myself to go with grace,,, you’re the hero flying around saving face,,, if i’m dead to you why are you at the wake,,,, god these lyrics just cut super hard okay!

i feel super personally called out by this goddamn song…

some to throw… some to make a diamond ring after the marriage fanfare

what a ghostly scene / i pace like a ghost

the concept of angrily haunting your past lover because they screwed you over is so amazing

used to tell me i was brave because i fought you

i think this is our first properly angry track five since like dear john and i want to put my head on the desk and start sobbing but i won’t

the halloween vibes of this are sending me this is so perfect

“i’m screaming at the sky” “stolen lullaby” amazing lyrics and also her vocals i don’t want to talk about how emotionally attached i am to this album because i am

so the battleships will sink beneath the waves again i think this song is really personal

the way she sings and the lyrics have a really specific effect i will be crying over

this song is so good. it’s so good. track five supremacy.can we discuss how perfect the production is on the album i think we should

mirrorball

yet more perfect production? she’s really feeding me with this one

after ithk and lwymmd i was not expecting to be so obsessed with track 6 but what a pleasant surprise. like i initially liked ithk too but not like this (don’t make the pun)

again i am so upset by the lyrics

the hush…. i think she invented singing

god the chorus is so specific and so very taylor that i could cry like!! yes!! this is what it’s all about no one touch me seriously i mean it this time

masquerade revelers means something and it’s a beautiful visual too man she really stepped up her songwriting with this album

this whole song feels like something directly out of a dream

THE BRIDGE? BRIDGE CITY? I AM THE RODEO CLOWNS? THE TIGHTROPE? I’M STILL A BELIEVER BUT I DON’T KNOW WHY? THE VOCALS? THE LAYERED SINGING? DON’T TALK TO ME

i’ll show you every version of yourself tonight means something and i will cry

seven

this means the most to me really i just… this is for the kids who were victims of something bigger than them and i don’t want to cry but i think i just might for personal reasons

i again really love the production thanks for my rights miss swift

the half speaking really works for me this time (and this song is closeted teenager rights)

passed down like folk songs,,, i have emotions and i finally learned how to pronounce folk

and i’ve been meaning to tell you / i think your house is haunted / your dad is always mad and that must be why these lyrics are flawless and stunning and god. yeah. this song y’all

will you run away with me? yes. you won’t have to cry or hide in the closet what did i say!! closeted teenager anthem i’m tatttooing this on my forehead

i used to scream ferociously and that whole lyric might be my favourite part

again her vocals are an absolute dream i love the higher register

i still got love for you,,, this is really about childhood love and the way it fades but leaves an indelible mark goodbye i am done i can’t deal with this

i would listen to karaoke of this on its own because the background music is so perfect

taylor swift saw me listening to the japanese house and girl in red and said “hey i can do that” and you know what? she could!

august

okay so before we start this listen i want to say this song made me hyperventilate and almost cry at one in the morning which was great like. i wanted a song that made me feel as much as say it by maggie rogers and taylor swift said “okay bet”

that being said i really do love this intro i feel it’s very beautiful and it reminds me of white teeth teens a bit i can’t explain why

this is the lowkey version of cruel summer and it is equally gay

never have i ever before,,, taylor said i will romanticize being a teenager in love and it will be the most beautiful album you have ever heard in your life

i can see us lost in the memory just the way she sings the chorus is so beautiful

honestly this makes me feel like i’m sitting in a field which i think is the vibe taylor wanted to accomplish with lover but hey

her cruel summers and augusts were the equivalent of my january huh

this is the sad ending for cruel summer this is when she looked up and said “yeah you being in love with me is the worst thing i’ve ever heard” no one talk to me ever again

“back when we were still changing for the better / wanting was enough” is an absolutely perfect lyric i don’t want anyone to speak to me for the next year

“to live for the hope of it all / cancelled plans just in case you called / and say meet me behind the mall / so much for summer love” that was amazing that was perfect thank you

“you were mine to lose”

i love this chorus so much it’s unreal it’s just wow

august sipped away like a bottle of wine CAUSE YOU WERE NEVER MINE

i don’t even know what lyric to type up because they’re all so good and they evoke such a specific feeling i feel like i was punched in the gut

have i mentioned how much i love this production yet? i love this production

isn’t this outro just the most stunning thing you’ve ever heard wow

this is me trying

such a change of pace in terms of production and yet i am completely enamoured by it

the intro is so beautiful and the way she just transitions into a song so viscerally about her insecurities i... i refuse to do this damnit

this is apologizing for cheating but it was on her this time (no i don’t think taylor actually cheated on anyone it’s called storytelling and i feel this is one of the songs farther from her than the others)

for some reason the background music reminds me of pure heroine?

lyrically and thematically it sounds like the archer and wow can’t tell you how much i adore that

favourite lyric: i got wasted like all my potential

the curve became a sphere,,,, this is just such a good and honest and raw song how does she do it i’m asking how does she do it

i really love the melody of this thing i don’t know what to tell you

it’s so upset and emotional but resigned in a sense? i can’t really properly describe this

again this is bridge city! i don’t know if i’ve said this before but the bridge for this song is truly impeccable her ability to do this astounds me like the songwriting alone y’all

i really do love the background beat

illicit affairs

the visuals and the imagery and the storyline of this song are so perfect and damn i can just see the music video (i maintain this is by the same narrator as august)

you’ll be flushed when you return do you see what i mean by perfect visuals?

the way her voice pitches up and the high notes

who allowed the chorus to be this amazing i’ve listened to it like ten times now and my eye still twitches (should i get that checked out?)

i would like to repeat that this is an extremely gay song thank you taylor

a dwindling mercurial high is such a good line ugh i love the imagery again

clandestine meetings and stolen stares,, our secret moments in a crowded room,,,

maybe the perfume thing could build off the water theme?

the bridge of this thing goddamn wow i can’t believe

YOU SHOWED ME COLOURS YOU KNOW I CAN’T SEE WITH ANYONE ELSE

she’s on a cliff screaming in anger because the affair destroyed her!! august + illicit affairs are the same narrator and this is me trying is the person she was with,,, actually i think this is me trying might be about the other person apologizing to the narrator of august + illicit affairs,,,,

you taught me a secret language you know i can’t speak with anyone else vs. do all lovers feel like they’re inventing something do you ever just sit on the floor and cry

for you i would ruin myself a million times,,, evelyn hugo quote about screaming i’m in love with celia st james,,, death by a thousand cuts,,,, yes it’s fine everything is fine

invisible string

ahhh the pizzicato! that’s beautiful that’s really on point she really said strings kids rights huh

i really do like this production and the way it contributes to this idyllic image of her childhood whew i love this song a lot

ugh the melody of the pre chorus is so lovely we have to stan

all along there was an invisible string,,, tying you to me,,, okay now i am mildly intrigued by how much of this was autobiographical goddamnit there will be no more explanation

bad was the blood… that’s so cute! she said i looked like an american singer! no one touch me

wow her vocals on this song are so lovely and the lyrics! aren’t the lyrics just flat out amazing we have to stan taylor swift i think

string that pulled me and there are musicians pulling strings in the background okay i see you

that dive bar,,, dive bar on the east side,,, we love a consistent muse (also met you in a bar)

oh yes i do really like this bridge too it’s so romantic and wonderful perfect

an axe to grind for the boys who broke my heart? i think she should be allowed to do that as a treat

the hell / heaven reference thanks for another religious metaphor to add to my collection

her vocals on this song are so unique and i also like them a lot my eye is twitching again

maybe i got my track eleven rights back didn’t it! i really hope this is track 11 otherwise i’m going to look like a clown (no i don’t want to google it)

the outro is so soothing and beautiful i think i hear a violin

mad woman

the piano! hearing real instruments on taylor songs again! we are so blessed

i think this is narrated by the same woman from the last great american dynasty honestly

maybe also by the august / illicit affairs narrator trying to get revenge my mind okay

every time you call me crazy i get more crazy ugh i love this! women straight up going unhinged i see you with your gone girl fanfiction miss swift

the way this song feels like a whispered confession and her vocals and the eerie nature of the background music we have absolutely no choice but to stan

now i breathe flames every time i talk is a really amazing visual

this feels like a better done version of i did something bad i said what i said

it’s obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together - i love that line! i love unhinged taylor swift! blank space and idsb mashed together with a new feel i can’t put my finger on but i am quite literally obsessed with it

every time you call me crazy i get more crazy yeah that’s a line

there really isn’t anything like a mad woman (also this is intentionally linked to the last great american dynasty and i won’t shut up about this now)

the bridge is so intimidating and delightful! hell hath no fury like a scorned woman wow the visuals i see in my head are amazing

good wives always know taylor this is a better criticism of the patriarchy than the man is i just want you to know that from me personally

the outro is amazing there’s definitely some sort of snare drum here (i don’t know instruments again)

epiphany

it did not click that this song was about the pandemic the first time i listened to it

but honestly i am so obsessed with this intro it reminds me of the archer a little bit

i think this is paralleling war with the pandemic

ease your rifle and the accompanying vocal is so well song

okay the beaches reference is helping my water and authenticity thing

some things you just can’t speak about yeah i will lose my mind for personal reasons

this song is really comforting for some weird reason

something med school did not cover feels like an actual punch to the gut. someone’s daughter, someone’s mother… okay. okay i didn’t get this the first time but i am upset now.

and some things you just can’t speak about is a line and a half i think

it’s really just so beautiful and it’s hurting me

what’s the significance of twenty? she keeps referencing it and in lover too

but wow the bridge is otherworldly i love it so much… her mind amazes me

watch you breathe in… watch you breathe in…. please it’s so beautiful i can’t

actually this song might be one of my favourites it’s so good (of course i’ve thought that about all the songs so take this comment with a grain of salt please)

the outro is also super heavenly do i hear strings again?

betty

so we’re all in agreement this is gay

the beginning sounds so country and that’s her beginning and this is about a high school love

you can’t believe a word she says (most times) is so fun and cute i can’t believe i got rights handed to me on a silver platter with this one

the storyline she implies in the chorus it’s literally so beautiful i just have a lot of feelings! i snuck in through the garden gate every night that summer just to seal my fate!

this feels like a quintessential taylor swift song with the characterizations and the lyrics and how it feels ripped out of a diary entry (yes i know it isn’t but that’s how it feels )

do i hear a fiddler? emily poe is that you? not the point i know

BUT IF I JUST SHOWED UP AT YOUR PARTY man the chorus really does snap

taylor swift said fuck 2020 god bless america we’re officially moving into a good timeline

on broken cobblestones is all of my rights encapsulated into one don’t touch me

this is just gay james is a lesbian i don’t make the rules i just enforce them please

betty i’m here on your doorstep LIKE IN THIS IS ME TRYING BETTY IS THE AUGUST / ILLICIT AFFAIRS / MAD WOMAN / CARDIGAN / THE LAST GREAT AMERICAN DYNASTY NARRATOR

the narrator of betty is the same as this is me trying no one talk anymore

WILL YOU HAVE WILL YOU LOVE ME WILL YOU KISS ME ON THE PORCH IN FRONT OF ALL YOUR STUPID FRIENDS THE MOMENT OF EMOTIONAL CATHARSIS I EXPERIENCED

i’m only seventeen i don’t know anything and the way it explicitly connects to cardigan

car again / cardigan is some nice wordplay

this is an objectively perfect song

peace

the opening music for this track is really lovely, it feels like a good return to lowkey after how Much betty was honestly

our coming of age has come and gone is one of the best opening lines i’ve ever heard

i’ve never had courage in my convictions won’t you look at what a great lyric that is

no i can never give you peace,,, man i really do like this hook

the production on this song is amazing

i’m a fire and i’ll keep your brittle heart warm! the ocean wave line helps my authenticity theory! they say love’s for show but i would die for you in secret! is this a song or a series of excerpts from my poetry the world may never know (i’m kidding i could never write anything this good)

would it be enough if i could never give you peace no one look at me i can’t be perceived any more than this

it’s like i’m wasting your honour wow what a line that is especially after exile but then the narratives don’t exactly match up hold i’m thinking

swing with you for the fences (i know places) sit with you in the trenches (epiphany) i feel like there’s something to referencing those songs directly after each other

oh.. the child line…. oh?

i’m a clown to the north does that count

man this song is so good and it gives me serious call it what you want vibes for some reason

but i would die for you in secret i feel like this bears repeating cause i’ll scream

would it be enough,,,, am i too much,,,, i would like to lie down

the outro to this is so pretty and haunting and thematically it kind of reminds me of dwoht / afterglow but that’s just me

hoax

i wrote hoax lyrics pre album but hers are much better

my smoking gun,,, knife to a gunfight,,, the way,,, man

okay a depressing song to close out a taylor album is new and im going to lose my mind

i really love the piano in the background like that’s beautiful

the confessions screaming on the cliff vibe i was right

YOUR FAITHLESS LOVE’S THE ONLY HOAX I BELIEVE IN

no other sadness in the world would do well that is a depressing ending to seeing daylight

my best laid plans / my sleight of hand / my barren land she’s literally such an amazing songwriter why is anyone allowed to have this level of talent and not pay appropriate taxes

THE ASH FROM YOUR FIRE IS THIS THE PARALLEL TO MY TEARS RICOCHET? i think i cracked something here wow

YOU KNOW I LEFT A PART OF ME BACK IN NEW YORK PLEASE EXPLAIN

the hero died so what’s the movie for i’m fine this is all very fine can you hear me screaming

you knew you won so what’s the point of keeping score i really think this is the other half of my tears ricochet you guys

her voice and the production combined here is so haunting

my only one my kingdom come undone can we just have a mental breakdown super quickly and collectively so i know i’m not really losing my mind

i really love this song a lot wow

the piano harmonies / melodies are so pretty (i don’t know which one it is sue me)

it’s perfect wow

#arden speaks #folklore #folklore reaction #taylor swift #this is over four thousand words

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sugar-petals · 4 years

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Now you HAVE to do a tarot readings on what sorta dads bts will be

yup, it’s due 😄 today i’ll use my favorite oracle cards with indian deities. i always look into this deck for family matters. the hindu gods are great fun, you’ll love these guys.

taehyung: VISHNU: “Involvement”

this card is about letting go and fully immersing yourself. which you bet taehyung is going to do. it’s pretty straightforward and intuitive to me that vishnu with his call to show one’s loyalty came out. taeyhung, and this won’t be news for anyone, be the most dedicated father ever. on the card he is represented by a dignified vishnu who is classically considered the god of the universe; stepping through a vortex of positivity. he has four arms (=four seasons) that carry the progression of the sun, a lotus to symbolize gratitude, a sparkly club to fight demons, and a shell to bring about silence. so, mister vishnu is a hell of a guy and fully equipped to do his job. which is likely going to apply to taehyung quite seamlessly. he will involve himself all year round (the seasons), be protective, wise, understanding, all while giving his family no reason to miss him. the silence shell also tells me he speaks gently with his kid, he never yells. the mood will be elated for the absolute majority of the time.

jimin — NATARAJA: “Choice”

the guy on the card literally looks like jimin, i’m losing my mind. i mean coincidence? nataraja: he’s short, he’s totally muscular, he’s chubby, his lips are big, and he’s straight up gyrating all over the place like a pro lmao! this guy is sizzling as fuck. synchronicity much 😋 will jimin be the hottest dad in town? you bet your wig! either way, i digress. this card indicates a decision, a compromise, something that calls you with an upbeat tune to leave the old things behind decisively. nataraja (who is actually an expression of the god shiva) is the ‘flame dancer/lord of dance’ deity of choice between destruction or creation. jimin is bound to apply major changes to his life when he becomes a dad, it’ll be outside his comfort zone. this kid turns it all upside down. a challenge to amp up his esteem will pop up pretty early. nataraja dances — much like jimin, that is no coincidence either — to rid himself off fear, ego, beating oneself up. i think this is what jimin wants to instill in his kid himself, to be determined in life. i think they can learn from each other in that way.

hoseok — KRISHNA’S RASA-LILA: “Rhythm”

another card that’s squarely about dancing. a rasa-lila is a feast in which people row up in a circle to krishna’s flute play. legend has it krishna attracted sheperdesses to dance to his music and they had so much fun it lasted for half a year like wow. and yeah, gdi this is literally pied piper. because krishna is the god of love and didn’t want to disappoint his guests, he multiplied himself (!) to dance with everybody. hobi will sort of feel that divide as a dad, too. he wants to share his dance and affection with fans so he’d have a hard time focusing on one family instead of the world as his family. he’d definitely want to keep his craftsmanship and popularity. whenever i see this card pop out, something all over the place is going, he could become a patchwork family dad. this home will never be silent nor underpopulated lol! in any case, just like krishna, hoseok will be the most entertaining parent EVER 😄 his kids will forget time with him and music will be present throughout the home. it’s also the card with the most erotic undertones in the reading, hobi’s sex life will be alive and well.

namjoon — GIRISHA: “Belief”

oh… damn. this gave me a very powerful impression. it’s similar to taehyung’s card, a great dignity is conveyed by the imagery. so, in detail: girisha is the majestic god of the himalaya, mount everest is his home. it’s also shown on the card behind girisha. so, if we interpret this, then: rest assured namjoon will move mountains when he becomes a dad, that much we can already be certain of. he’ll take his task very seriously and won’t mess around much. namjoon will do adulting and raising kids the focused way. now, girisha is about belief but it does not mean religion is a factor here. it is more of a conviction that we as humans are wanted and needed as we are, where we are. someone who doubts himself as much as joon is likely encountering that trust in himself once he becomes a father. this is good news! once he believes he can be a good dad, he will be a good and wise dad. small detail i picked up to give a closing thought: girisha is a deity that meditates a tremendous lot, namjoon might pick this up to balance himself. he’ll be into spirituality and teach his kid about principles of the universe and how nature works. who knows, namjoon might be purchasing oracle cards as we speak.

jungkook: NARAYANA: “Your Potential”

(before we get started here: definitely scroll back to crossread taehyung’s interpretation, it’s the same deity, just in a different form.) i get a sense he will be a very imaginative and resourceful father but also someone who knows when to retreat and think things over. i’ll explain what i mean. on this card, our favorite good ole vishnu again appears in his version of a creator god: narayana. it’s a very dreamy kind of deity we’re seeing here. narayana loves to sleep coiled up inside the world snake ananta who allows him to come up with new ideas he can install in the world. jungkook will be in that kind of occasional limbo, too. he figures out many things to expand and improve in the home and his family. i’d compare his fatherhood to how he learns english, that’s pretty much the same principle. we also see a masculine angelic being kneeling before narayana in prayer, it could be jungkook’s son who really admires his father a lot and listens to advice without rebelling against it. maybe it’s because jungkook can get on eye level with his kid without much trouble. last but not least, the literal interpretation: jk will be a cute and sleepy dad. ♡😴

seokjin — GANGA: “Flexibility”

this card is just... super beautiful! as expected when it comes to kim seokjin, who are we kidding, there’s no other option. we see the lotus goddess ganga float on water pretty much completely unbothered. she’s got her best gown on, the sky is blue, everything is in bloom around her. i think this couldn’t be any more perfect to describe jin as a dad. he looks good (while jimin will be the hot dad in bts, jin will be the dazzling one), he does his thing, he goes with the flow. flexibility is a pretty accurate key word i’d apply to him. since ganga is responsible for the holy and peaceful river ganges, she is said to bring about softness, innocence, going past obstacles. jin is going to be veeery chill about his daily life, with no hurry or pressures whatsoever. that transfers to the kid and his partner so heavily, we’ll see a very wholesome and slow-paced family dynamic play out. it’s the sweetest thing. it really nurtures the child. out of all cards i pulled, he’s by far the most lighthearted dad. i was blown away, the card’s message is such a reassuring and promising one. you go jin!

yoongi — GANESHA/NRITYA-GANAPATI: “Vocation”

and here’s the odd one out to round this up in an interesting way. you won’t be surprised, i wasn’t surprised. you probably already suspect where this vocation thing is going. i see what the cards are trying to tell me over and over. yoongi is pretty preoccupied following his higher calling. not obsessively, but steady and stalwart enough. and since he doesn’t half-ass anything and tends to limit himself to one goal, i don’t think he’s gonna abandon his music and consider fatherhood his new vocation. if he does, mind you, he will consider it like a kind of heart’s desire to work on. however, the god that rules this card pretty much gives away what yoongi will be doing in the near future 😅 nritya-ganapati is an embodiment of the most popular writer god: sweet and relaxed ganesha, i’m sure you’ve heard about him. ganesha is a very creative elephant deity who dances through all ill fate and grants healing. it’s obvious to me that yoongi is very much that. writing songs, sorting himself out (!), doing what he does best. vocation is his prized value, he needs something to put out to the world. becoming daddy woongles is probably something he reserved for later in life, job comes first. all slowly but surely, elephants move with deliberation.

#anon #cub mail 🐅#oracle card reading #bts #bts tarot #oracle cards

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demonsdarling · 4 years

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folklore first listen thoughts

the 1: CATCHY from the start. HIT THE GROUND RUNNING sweeter than fiction rights. very sweet heartbreak song. “in my defense i have none” NEVER LEAVING WELL ENOUGH ALONE. i like it a lot, so much metaphor and imagery. i definitely wanna feel this

cardigan: catchy, very much the type of song that would sound good loud in the car at night. “a friend to all is a friend to none, chase two girls lose the one”. i really can’t wait to figure out what this one means. so far this feels very heartbreak heavy, even though i’m only two songs in. “tried to change the ending, peter losing wendy”. obviously young love WHY DO I WANNA FEEL THESE SO BAD. someone better take one for the team and break my heart while i’m still a teenager. someone to make me feel better about myself and then to look back on losing that. wow

the last great american dynasty: rebecca as a character being introduced, i really like the idea here. like gossiping at a wedding like that. “maddest woman this town has ever seen”. i feel like rebecca is a character taylor relates to and put herself into her. TAYLOR BOUGHT THE HOUSE WOW. so it’s about the woman who lived there before her i love that. if i hadn’t lived in my house for my whole life, i’d totally romanticize the people who lived here before.

exile: off the bat reminds me of the last time. i like the film/story/ending theme that continues throughout the album. it really connects it all and i feel very immersed into it. lyrically this song is very beautiful and it just sounds so very good. sounds very red & speak now which i obviously LOVE. also i love that it’s so long. “you’re not my homeland anymore” WOW WOW. so beautiful ily this song

my tears ricochet: sounds very haunting right off the bat. weeping in a sunlit room hurts me so much i just know this will be the best crying song. loveD till my dying day?? is this from the perspective of a dead person STOP that’s heartbreaking. i have chills what the fuck. it’s so BEAUTIFUL “you wear the same jewels i have you to bury me” i said wow out loud like. i have nothing else to say but wow. stolen lullaby <3

mirrorball: sounds very young and sweet. reminds me of starlight for some reason, which i love so much. it sounds like a really sweet first love and learning about the other person and yourself and falling into that and learning from the experience. i might be obsessed with the idea of first love lately, so that’s perfect for me. this is a favorite i love it so much.

SEVEN!: so i claimed this song earlier because i say seven as a response to everything and thought it was funny. but this is a missing childhood anthem, which is so fearless. childhood best friends, this is everything to me. i was worried i wouldn’t love it this much. “just like a folk song, our love will be passed on” PLEASE PICTURE ME IN THE WEEDS BEFORE I LEARN CIVILITY. i’m literally crying. growing up was always my biggest fear, i always want to go back to being little and this wraps it up so well. “passed on like folk songs, our love lasts so long”

august: back to a love song! young love! OH ITS SO SWEET AND HAPPY SOUNDING. kind of an imaginary love, taylor at my age, and i’m inserting myself here because it feels so right. i had a trio of songs on fearless at age 7 and these three songs feels like that again. yeah i’m gonna need a summer romance like i’ve been dreaming of since i was 15. this sounds like every daydream i have about the people i have crushes on and i love that so much. i love relating to taylor so much.

this is me trying: this is so beautiful wow. it has the energy of a sweet and soft version of hygtg but this time taylor is chasing? i think this is one those songs everyone can adapt to their story. “so i got wasted like all my potential”. this one feels so real to me. i really am relating to this one and i might fall apart to this song. second cry of the album.

illicit affairs: I THOUGHT THIS WAS GONNA UPBEAT AND LOVER-ESQUE but it’s a beautiful sweet secret love story. this love here seems crushing and painful. it reminds me a little of 1989 in the vocals i think? which is so cool. i really love the bridge on this one. this love story is so obviously so unique and all-consuming and yet it’s secret at the same time. i fucking love it.

invisible string: of course she says 16 again!!!!! why does she romanticize 16 so much? for me it’s 17. but i’m 19 now. i would dance barefoot in the grass to this one. something pulling two people together like an invisible string no matter how far apart they get. SOULMATE SONG!!!! wow!!! all along we were destined. IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY. the dive bar! something pulled her to him! i love that so much.

mad woman: SHE REALLY DID SAY FUCK YOU FOREVER WHAAT. i went OOH! but this is very ~the man~ and reputation vibes but SOFT and so it feels very taylor, lyrically and emotionally, like this feels like a side of her we’ve seen before but painted in a different light. “women like hunting witches too” “every time you call me crazy i get more crazy” WHY ARE PEOPLE MEAN TO HER I WILL BEAT UP EVERYONE WHO IS MEAN TO HER. there’s no need to tear people down to get to the top.

epiphany: another super long song!! i’m being told betty is incredible and i’m itching to listen to it but this sounds so beautiful. take a shot whenever i say beautiful or wow! this feels like another soulmate song but i hate to be wrong so if i am wrong, don’t mention it. this sounds so very classical and fresh for taylor but also it has such a taste of taylor. something new she’s doing here but her flavor is always there and i love that. only 20 minutes to sleep but you dream of some epiphany 💜💜💜💜

betty: i have high expectations. oh harmonica very folksy sounds very like the beginning. hehe she said fuck again THE SUMMER THING hi august! i suppose this is from the perspective of the other person? i like this very much, i love the idea of young stupid love and first loves. james. james and betty i love them very much. this is like when i make a playlist and say someone should send me these songs. “i’m only 17 i don’t know anything” i just wanna be seventeen again BITCH. SHE SAID CARDIGAN CAR AGAIN i love thattt.

peace: “our coming of age is coming and going” OKAY HIT ME I GUESS? this one is making me feel things. if i could sing, i’d never stop singing this. her fears within her relationship and the chaos her life brings to his. it’s very showing of her love and worries within what seems like a solid relationship.

hoax: what i want to do right now is drive to a literal cliff / scenic overlook and sit in the car and cry to this song. “i am ash to your fire” did she not say that in another song? i don’t remember which. but i hear the struggles she went through in herself and how hard it was to get through, not just on her own but with someone else. i hope taylor is happy and safe in her relationship. in any relationship she enters into, its all i want.

this album was beautiful and lovely and everything i needed and wanted i only cried three? four? times. it’s so stunning and beautiful and i’ve said beautiful way too many times but there’s no other words. it’s incredible. i haven’t felt this much in so long. and if i’m wrong about anything here, never mention it again <3.

i love you, taylor.

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ts1989fanatic · 5 years

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TS7 is finally here!

If you’re like me or any of the millions of Swifties out there, the arrival of this next era is just as exciting as a brand-new bookshelf full of reads you get to experience for the first time.

After listening to the album on repeat all weekend, I decided to celebrate Lover with a book roundup inspired by each of the songs (since it’s the only thing I’ll be listening to for the foreseeable future, don’t @ me.).

ts1989fanatic an interesting perspective well written obviously a swiftie.

1. “I Forgot That You Existed” (Best Friends Forever, by Jennifer Weiner)

You heard it from Taylor first: indifference is the new vengeance. This solid album-opener is upbeat and poppy, a nice contrast with the lyrics about the (final?) end of a broken relationship, friendship (or feud), when you actually forget that the person you once had so much ire for still lives. She transitions from “Your name on my lips, tongue-tied/Free rent, living in my mind” to “forgot that you existed/and I thought that it would kill me, but it didn’t” with ease. But of course, insisting that you forget someone existed while singing about them would introduce interesting tension into any relationship. It reminded me of Jennifer Weiner’s Best Friends Forever, about what happens when a former friend shows up on your doorstep in a crisis, insisting you’re the only one who can help them out of a tight spot (when you’d rather do anything but).

2. “Cruel Summer” (Do You Want to Start a Scandal, by Tessa Dare)

Lyrically and sonically, this is one of my favorites on the entire album (it’s so good it should have been a single!) It’s got an Out of the Woods meets Getaway Car vibe in terms of the melody. Wistful, a bit haunting, but also a total bop. “So cut the headlights, summer’s a knife/I’m always waiting for you just to cut to the bone” describes a low point in Swift’s life (Summer 2016, ugh), juxtaposed with the high of discovering new love. There are so many books I could have picked for this, but “I don’t want to keep secrets just to keep you” reminded me of the Regency romance trope where the heroine has a secret, or finds herself in a situation where her reputation is at stake, but is still tempted by a handsome rogue who might lead her into temptation and true love. (Sound a bit familiar?) Do You Want to Start a Scandal by Tessa Dare feels like the perfect accompaniment to this song about a woman who must prove her innocence in the face of a sullied reputation or be forced to marry a man she doesn’t think she could ever love.

3. “Lover” (Roomies, by Christina Lauren)

The title track (and the one I’ve been singing in the shower for days) is a swoony daydream of a couple in complete harmony, as Swift spins wedding vow-like lyrics such as “With every guitar string scar on my hand/I take this magnetic force of a man to be my…lover/My heart’s been borrowed and yours has been blue/all’s well that end’s well to end up with you/swear to be overdramatic and true/to my…lover.” But Swift is all about balance in her songs, so imagery of keeping up the Christmas lights in “our place” is juxtaposed with suspicion that “everyone who sees you wants you.” This track reminded me of Roomies by Christina Lauren, with its musician main character and the trope of having to share a space while inevitably falling in love.

4. “The Man” (The Whisper Network, by Chandler Baker)

The double-standards between men and women have been explored in songs and novels since both art forms existed. Swift has already confronted the media’s perception of her as a victim, as a girl who goes on too many dates but can’t make them stay, etc. But in “The Man”, she more directly confronts how different she’d be treated if she were the opposite gender. How could I not think of the new thriller The Whisper Network, about a group of women who come forward about their male boss’ behavior of harassment in the workplace. Instead of continuing to suffer in silence, they tell the truth, resulting in an explosive conflict. I sort of saw the ending coming, but was very glad I was right.

5. “The Archer” (Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen)

Another slower, lyric-driven track on the album with gut-punching truths about love, friendship, and holding on to the one who has your heart. “The Archer” is associated with being a Sagittarius (which Swift is), but also her dynamic with the world. “Who could ever leave me, darling?/But who could stay?” is self-aware in a new way for Swift, as is “I never grew up, it’s getting so old” or “I see right through me.” This is one of my favorite tracks on the album, as Swift confronts her cultivated image as both archer and prey of fame and of love. Listening to the rising energy of the track as it builds to a anti-fairy-tale crescendo plus Swift’s lyrics made me think of Pride and Prejudice: Elizabeth Bennet is forced to acknowledge how her own prejudices have made it difficult for others to love her, but that she is deserving of an imperfect love. (And how could “All of my enemies started out friends” not remind you of awful Mr. Wickham?)

6. “I Think He Knows” (The Duke and I, by Julia Quinn)

After a slower song, this heats things up a bit, describing the early sizzle of a relationship before it even starts. For an entire album that sings the praises of a man, I liked the moment in the pre-chorus where she says “He’s so obsessed with me, and boy, I understand.” Own your worth, girl! The bridge was my favorite part of this song (as it often is with Swift; girl knows how to bridge) as it played with tempo and rhyme. “Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh/We can follow the sparks, I’ll drive.” Swift explores the tension of the moment between seeing someone and initiating contact—songs like these always sting with a bit of danger, too, because the man knows she wants him but neither of them say anything in public about it. She’s whispering in the dark, which gives me serious secret romance vibes. The Duke and I by Julia Quinn is about Simon, who is planning to propose to his BFF’s sister even though he doesn’t actually love her. It’s an arrangement that suits them both, but before they both know it, Daphne is giving Simon serious “I Think he Knows” vibes.

7. “Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince” (The Cheerleaders, by Kara Thomas)

If you don’t get the oft-spoken adage that “politics is like high-school,” this song takes the metaphor to the next level. Subtly political but 100% heartbreaking, Swift reimagines the political sphere (and her role in it) as a high school romance, moving from “American glory, faded before me,” painting the democratic 2016 election loss as a ripped-up prom dress (from Miss Americana, who assumed she would win.) Oozing drama and storytelling the way only Swift can, I love the moody elements of the brokenhearted girl contrasted with the new riff on a cheerleading chant (Go Fight Win!). This song is about mourning loss and then finding the strength to say “I know we’re going to win,” but it’s haunting melody and lyrics led me to pick a Cheerleader-inspired thriller. The Cheerleaders is about a string of cheerleaders murdered in a small town five years ago… and just when everyone thinks it’s time to move on, one girl becomes the center of a mystery that never truly died.

8. “Paper Rings” (The Royal We, by Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan)

I’m on my fourth listen of the album and this might be my favorite track on it (though that changes minute by minute, with an album as dynamic as this—just to further accentuate the point, by the time of posting this piece, my new favorite might be I Think He Knows?). It’s a totally retro, ’60s style song—a totally fresh sound for Swift, and one that fits perfectly with her new aesthetic. (Makes me wonder why this wasn’t one of the singles released before the record.) It is a gold-mine for Swiftian lyricism, with so many gems I can’t possibly call them all out, and it moves so fast (like a good read) that you both want to cascade over them and pause to hear each line at least 5x before it passes you by. It’s an unabashed love song, relishing in the joy of knowing you’re with the one you love so much that “I like shiny things, but I’d marry you with paper rings”. The line that stuck out the most was “I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this,” which made me think of when Bex Porter goes to Oxford in The Royal We and, completely by accident, falls in love with the heir to the throne.

9. “Cornelia Street” (Passion on Park Avenue, by Lauren Layne)

“Cornelia Street” is sort of the antithesis to I Think He knows. It’s about remembering the early days of a new relationship (“We were a fresh page on the desk/filling in the blanks as we go”) and being more than willing to give up all the good that comes with fresh starts in order to settle into something real. It aches with melancholy, because any time we give something up should be a little sad—but it brims with hope and Swift’s trademarked optimism about love. “I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends/I’d never walk Cornelia Street again/ That’s the kinda heartbreak time could never mend.” I had to pick an NYC-set story for this, like Lauren Layne’s Passion on Park Avenue. The city is another character in the romance between a successful jewelry-business owner and the son of the woman her mother used to work for.

10. “Death By a Thousand Cuts” (Please Don’t Go Before I Get Better, by Madisen Kuhn)

Inspired by the Netflix movie Something Great, this is one of the few sad songs on the record, about a girl going through a breakup who can’t help but linger in happier memories. (For the record: “I dress to kill my time” is genius, as are so many of these lyrics.) Only Swift is so good at pairing such devastating messaging with a pop beat you can’t help but want to sing. This song was the hardest one to pick a book for (especially because it’s already inspired by a movie) so I decided to go with a poetry collection! Please Don’t Go Before I Get Better is all about the aches and sun rays of growing up, told in a staggeringly relatable voice that will make you want to curl up on the couch and cry your eyes out.

11. “London Boy” (Red, White and Royal Blue, by Casey McQuiston)

This is 100% about Joe Alwyn, but also… Taylor dated at least two Brits that we know of before him, so this song is also about what we already knew (“the rumors are true”): she has a penchant for London Boys. Essentially a road map of her favorite places in the city, this indulgent ditty trades “Tennessee Whiskey” for “A gray sky, a rainy cab ride” and of course, her man by her side. Red, White, and Royal Blue is the perfect pick for this song, about two boys who fall in love (after a rough start where they were almost enemies) amidst those gray, rainy skies… but one of them happens to be the son of an American President, and the other, the current Prince of England.

12. “Soon You’ll Get Better (feat. Dixie Chicks)” (Swamplandia! by Karen Russell)

Of all the songs on the album, this one gave me the most vintage Swift vibes. There’s no denying that she is an astonishingly talented songwriter, especially when you listen to what is essentially her greatest fear laid bare on this track with just a bit of guitar and the Dixie Chicks harmonizing in the background. Here, the story shines: Swift’s mother has been sick for a number of years, and while they’ve mostly kept the details of that battle private, this is the most vulnerable moment of love for her mother on an album mostly about finding true love. “Holy orange bottles, each night I pray to you/Desperate people find faith, so now I pray to Jesus, too.” A friend of mine recently lost their mother just after getting married, and it made me marvel at how life often delivers us highs and lows to grapple with simultaneously. While all of this was going on—Kanye and Kim, Joe and London, another world tour, another album—in the background, Swift has been terrified of losing her mother. This song made me think of Swamplandia!, a novel about a young girl living in a gator-wrestling theme park where her mother used to be the main event, until she passed away. Now, in the wake of her death, the girl and her siblings must grapple with their mother’s legacy as a competing business rises up to swallow the success she built on the swamp.

13. “False God” (City of Girls, by Elizabeth Gilbert)

Is that a saxophone in the background of a Taylor Swift song? This slow, jazzy number is all about love and desire—and how we come back to it even when the world around us (and sometimes we, ourselves) put it in jeopardy. “And I can’t talk to you when you’re like this/Staring out the window like I’m not your favorite town/I’m New York City” and other lyrics referencing New York seem to be the grounding force in an otherwise tumultuous relationship. Multiple times on this record Swift has alluded to rough patches in her current happiness, but connection is always the solution to fixing it. She seems to say that if you treat your relationship like it’s your religion, you can get through anything. This is one of the sexier songs on the album, but it’s also got serious NYC vibes, so I’m picking City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert: a novel all about relishing romance in the glitzy 1940’s New York Theater scene, but also how desire can either set us on the road to ruin, or redemption.

14. “You Need to Calm Down” (The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo, by Taylor Jenkins Reid)

This song has done what Swift does best: inspire conversation and a bit of controversy. Acknowledging that it was past time for her to be an outspoken ally for the LGBTQIAP+ community, YNTCD tackles the various ways communities are pitted against one another (especially on the internet.) The first verse examines her personal haters (“Say it in the street, that’s a knock-out/But you say it in a Tweet, that’s a cop-out), the second calls out homophobes (“Shade never made anybody less gay”), and the third examines how her relationships with her female contemporaries have often been antagonistic, something she herself has been responsible perpetuating in the past with songs like “Bad Blood” and “Better Than Revenge” (“We all know now, we all got crowns/you need to calm down.”) The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo is about a famous actress who hid the great female love of her life behind multiple male partners and uses her platform to tell the truth (all while hiding one last devastating secret). While Taylor herself has not come out as part of the LGBTQ community, she has come out as an ally, and this book made me think about the issues of privacy, platform, allyship, and identity that the song also confronts. If there’s more to the story of Swift’s relationship to the LGBTQIAP+ community, she’s going to share it on her own terms.

15.“Afterglow” (Queenie, by Candice Carty-Williams)

This song ranks high on my favorites from the album, and it’s a rare genre from Swift: the apology song. (The other famous one is Speak Now’s “Back to December.”) In this mid-tempo song with slamming drums and a breathy falsetto, Swift yearns for the partner she pushed away to meet her in the moments after the fight ends. “It’s all me, in my head/I’m the one who burned us down/ but it’s not what I meant,” she insists. There’s still hope here though, as opposed to earlier songs on the record that signal the doom of a friendship or a breakup after-the-fact. Queenie, by Candice Carty-Williams, is a novel about a girl coming to terms with her role in a failed relationship, a career she can’t seem to succeed in, and friends she unknowingly betrays. “Why’d I have to break what I love so much?” is a question asked in this song’s chorus, and one Queenie must answer in order to find real, lasting happiness.

16. “ME! (feat. Brendon Urie)” (Crazy Rich Asians, by Kevin Kwan)

This self-love anthem is bubblegum sweet and full of earworms: the “Shake it Off“ of the TS7 Era. It makes me think of lightning-fast beach reads that you can’t put down and that feel so good to read but also have a deeper meaning to them. Just because it’s not the most lyrically advanced of her songs doesn’t mean this bop doesn’t deserve to be celebrated— it reminded me of how romances constantly get a bad rep (lol, see what I did there?) as somehow lesser than other genres. I love that Taylor doesn’t care about what other people think and is 100% focused on being her authentic self— just like the heroine of Crazy Rich Asians, Rachel Chu. When confronted with the wealth and expectations of her boyfriend Nick’s family (who don’t think she’s good enough for him), she insists it’s her individuality that makes her the perfect partner for him.

17. “It’s Nice to Have a Friend” (This Love Story Will Self-Destruct, by Leslie Cohen)

This track might be my second favorite? It’s so different (Ukulele? Trombone? Is that what I’m hearing?) and such a contrast to the beginning of the album, the opener closes the door on a once meaningful friendship. It’s also a deceiving song, in that I’m still not 100% sure what it’s about. I think Swift is exploring the importance of friendship in all its forms: in childhood (“School bell rings, walk me home”) to adolescence “Something gave you the nerve/to touch my hand”) to romantic love (“Church bells ring, carry me home/rice on the ground looks like snow”). Ultimately, she may be saying that the most important thing about a romantic partner is that they make you feel like you have a friend—when you’re young, the thing that matters most is feeling seen by other people. If your lover is also your best friend, then you know they always have your back. A love story that takes place over two characters’ twenties, This Love Story Will Self-Destruct is about the missteps, betrayals, beautiful moments and connection that forms between two people over a decade.

18. “Daylight” (Evvie Drake Starts Over, by Linda Holmes)

“My love was as cruel as the cities I lived in.” What a way to begin this album closer. Swift’s last tracks have a tradition of being the ones that are most emblematic of her current state of mind, but they also have developed certain themes over time. Renewal, starting over, self-reflection, and hope are all subjects “Daylight” sheds a little light on. She acknowledges past failings (“I wounded the good and trusted the wicked”) and what she wants for the future (“I once believed love would be [burning red]/but it’s golden”). A book that feels like daylight on your skin is what’s needed for this song, and I think Evvie Drake Starts Over is the perfect pick: a story about a woman still grieving the loss of her husband but who finds herself moving on with a former major league baseball player. Both of them have pasts they are healing from, but together, they find hope for the future. “I’ve been sleeping so long in a twenty-year dark night/and now I see daylight.” And, unlike (I think?) any other song in her catalogue, she speaks in the end, not sings, in a direct appeal to her audience. Her very last words are “You are what you love.” Well, I love Taylor Swift. I love a good song lyric to sink my teeth into, or to sing. I love love. And I love a good story, whether it comes from a song or a book, and when you’re done with the album, I hope you find some here.

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thephantomofthe-internet · 5 years

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A Kiss from the Afterlife

Rocker!Billy Hargrove x Holloway!Reader

Word Count: 3,989

Warnings: death mention!, alcohol, swearing, angst

Author’s note: I haven’t written in awhile, hope you guys still like me and my stuff, I like this story a lot personally

Tag List: @carolimedanvers @hotstuffhargrove @thechickvic @alex--awesome--22 @lilmissperfectlyimperfect @so-not-hotmess @hawkeyeharrington @sunflowercandie @kaliforniacoastalteens @songforhema @spidey-pal @mickmoon @buckybarneshairpullingkink @marvelismylifffe @baebee35

The assignment was clear. It was stupid, but it was clear. A fluff piece for the Indianapolis Tribune, reviewing local Indiana bands for state pride or some shit. It felt totally out of your element. You should be reviewing the latest new wave flash in the pan or whatever Michael Jackson single had been dropped and hit high enough on the top one hundred to pay attention to, which was almost every single. Much more important work than some garage bands going to open mic nights on the weekend and would break up in a month over a girl who everyone else would call their Yoko Ono.

This wasn’t worth your time.

But what Chris said go. Chris, your editor, was working under the assumption that fluff pieces about local work get more local readers. A sort of self-flagellation for a crappy state. So, you did as little research as possible to find three up and coming acts from around greater Indianapolis, finding three of the most boring seeming hair metal bands that might get successful, and found gigs to watch.

You promised yourself that you weren’t going farther than Gary, but Chris insisted on you going down to Carmel, apparently the band there was really popular and missing them would get too many letters to the editor. You begrudgingly agreed, but only because Carmel was just far enough from Hawkins to keep your mind at bay. You found solace knowing that the band would probably be the worst. Amateur bands with really good names always failed, it was the rule. Good bands got good names later.

And Crown of Thorns was a really good band name.

You’d found a slew of fans to interview in Carmel, according to them they were like Guns n’ Roses had a baby with Madonna’s Like a Prayer video-all religious imagery and hard rock sensibility. Sounded too good to be true. No garage band was that good. You wondered what they actually liked. Usually, the intense fans were either friends with or fucking the band members; groupies don’t just appear they start as girlfriends and boyfriends and buddies from high school looking for free booze. You don’t how many ex-girlfriends, boyfriends, and friends you’d talk to for your interviews for the dumb piece.

You wondered how many ex-girlfriends you’d interviewed for the preamble for Crown of Thorns. All their fans seemed to be women, at least the ones who wanted to be interviewed were. It was strange, usually there was a couple beer bros wandering around looking to talk about how some band so fucking awesome or whatever.

Still, you didn’t bother to question it. There was one perk of this assignment and that was not having to work the awful nine to five in stuffy professional attire. Well worn jeans and a baggy tee shirt beat blazers and heels any day of the damn week. You wandered into the venue late that night, the bar called The Muddy Duck which looked as terrible as its name was; you made a note to describe the place as kindly as you could.

The bar was dim and awful. It stunk of beer spilled hours ago and puke. So much puke. The place smelt so bad you wondered if they filled the walls with the stuff instead of insulation. The floor was sticky under your boots and people kept bumping against you. The band hadn’t even come onstage and someone had already spilt a drink on you, sticky liquid trailing down your back and making your skin crawling involuntarily. Some sloppy girl muttered “Sorry…” dropping her sugar crusted martini glass on the counter before stumbling off. You pulled the drenched material off your back before pushing your way to the front. The crappy lights above the milk crates the place was calling a stage had flashed on and the entire room fell into a hush. You pulled out your notepad, jabbing your pencil behind your ear.

Three hulking men took the stage, each scruffier than the last, most hunched over with their instruments strung around their backs; bass guitar and guitar and drumsticks shoved as far away from their person as possible. They all looked as if they didn’t want to be seen, you wrote that down, noting their homemade band merchandise and stringy unkempt hair.

Then, the crowd cheered. The forth member was climbing the steps, fluffy mullet bouncing with each of his steps. He turned to the audience, throwing up the horns in a dramatic pose, hands held in a ‘v’ over his head and head tipped back up at the ceiling. The ring of feminine screams washed over your ears, causing you to throw your hands over your ears, trying to save your ear drums from their squeals.

An elbow jabbed into your ribs, bringing your attention to a spiky looking Siouxie Sioux knockoff who was smirking down at you “If you can’t handle that, you aren’t going to be able to handle this show.” She said, her voice carrying over the sound of the crowd.

“Thanks for the tip.” You called back, writing down the quote, making a note to find her before you left, to get one good interview out of this mess.

The drummer had taken his seat, the guitarists pulling their instruments to the front of them. The singer took the microphone in his hands like it was his lover, his eyes scanning the scene. They met yours for the briefest of moments and recognition hit you like a freight train.

Billy god damn Hargrove. You wanted to die.

Of course you had to interview Hargrove. Of course he had his own shitty hair metal band even though it was 19 god damn 91 and hair metal was dying off like flies on fly paper. Of course he was trying to fuck the audience with his eyes. You prayed he didn’t recognize you. You prayed you could get through this interview without any spill ups. You just wanted to disappear from Hawkins bullshit and the people who made it awful. Billy Hargrove made it awful.

Billy Hargrove destroyed your family.

Heather was your little sister, your bratty baby sister who stole your clothes and destroyed your makeup and followed you around helplessly. She was your stuck up, immature, callus, popularity obsessed sister. She was a kid. You left Hawkins to go to college, to get away from your fighting parents and your mother’s slow descent into alcoholism. You went into journalism because it was the only thing you could relate to your father about and you wanted that praise. You stayed away from your family when you could, the mess growing too big for you to tackle. You tried to keep up with Heather, but she didn’t want check in from her older sister. She was too old for a babysitter, to be babied by her older sibling. She stopped answering your calls, so you stopped calling.

And then, she was gone. They were gone. Lost to some stupid fire in a stupid mall. Your whole family, just gone. There were a handful of survivors, and you didn’t blame them, but in your heart one person shouldn’t have been saved. And that was Hargrove. Why did the universe save a philandering womanizer with a penchant for bullying get to live when your baby sister had to die? How was that fair? If you’d ever fully believed in God, you lost your faith in them the day you found out about your sister.

And you never forgave Hawkins. You turned your back on the place, sold your family home and the newspaper, packed up what was important and gave the rest to Goodwill. Life wasn’t in Hawkins anymore, it was anywhere else. Indianapolis didn’t feel far enough yet, but it held a decent paying job and a life away from what hurt you. A small change did more than enough to feel free of the ghosts chasing you from a joint grave plot.

The intro to their first song blared from the lead guitarist’s amp, filling the room with screeching metallic notes, far too fast to be the start of a song. You waited for the crash of cymbals or the mellow sound of the bass or even a note from Hargrove. The song opened with a minute long solo. You absolutely hated that, it stunk of the seventies psychedelic rock your older cousins would blast in the basement during Christmas parties, all claiming to be Satanists and against the holiday until their parents let them each have a beer. The sound left a sour taste in your mouth.

What didn’t help was the pure, wordless wail Hargrove let out as the guitar cut out. The audience was deathly silent, on the edge of their seats waiting for something. What it was, you weren’t sure, but you watched his hands as he adjusted his grip and pulled himself in close, his lips almost touching its centre, his icy blue eyes lowering to meet the gaze of the room again.

“I watched the blood pour from your eyes…” he crooned out, his eyelashes fluttering as if he’d sung something romantic. His voice wasn’t strong, but the way he held the microphone. There was a phrase for it; a term…it was on the tip of your tongue. It found you by the end of the song, which seemed to solely about watching the one you love fall out of love with you, which dark imagery.

As the room applauded, you found your mind again, his stupid stare and the way he held the audience in the palm of his hand. Frank Sinatra syndrome. You might have made up the term, but it made too much sense. Sinatra was a dreamboat in the forties and an emotional singer who owned a room and the hearts of his fan base, a majority of which were women. It said that in the cramped, warm venues of his early career of the late twenties and early thirties that you could smell the pheromones coming off the girls in the room. It seemed Billy Hargrove had found a way to do the same. He had the whole room wrapped around his little finger.

Now it made sense why you’d only been able to find women who were interested in the band, no straight man would ever be interested in them. And no gay man would get caught by reporters looking for a story, too dangerous. Now it made sense why the bar was so shit and the girls here were so hot-straight girls would go anywhere for a peak at a hottie like Hargrove, you remembered how the girls chased him in high school, how desperate they were for just a peak at him in his gym clothes or shirtless at the pool.

Billy Hargrove still had a way with the girls.

They managed four more songs, only one a cover, which impressed you a fair bit. The amount of kids you’d listen to play AC/DC and Metallica and Motley Crue in the week alone was enough to make you hate any song with an electric guitar in it. Hearing original songs, albeit trite drivel about love and losing girls and sex under God’s eye, was almost a breath of fresh air. Almost. If it hadn’t been Hargrove, it would’ve been completely worth the trip down.

But you had to deal with Hargrove.

His performance ended and the crowd erupted into uproarious applause as the group shuffled off the stage, save Hargrove who jumped off the front of the stage, landing directly in front of you.

“You the chick from the Indianapolis Tribune?” he asked, looking you over with a lazy look, half-hearted in both its intention and its purpose.

You tucked your pencil behind your ear, looking at him in pure annoyance “You see anyone else taking notes?” you asked. Billy chuckled drily, running a hand through his sweaty looking hair, pulling a black hair elastic off his right wrist, right above the black leather cuff he had on both his wrists, and pulling his tangled curls off the back of his neck.

“The boys are at the bar, come over when you want an actual interview instead of bitching.” He replied shortly, stalking off as a small hoard of girls followed behind him. He already had groupies. Oh my fucking god.

You took a deep breath, swallowed your pride, and walked over to the bar, ordering yourself a beer before pulling up a stool. Billy smirked slightly as he saw you turn to the group. He slung an arm over a girl in a tight leather skirt, causing the other girls to walk off; apparently, Hargrove had made his choice for the night and the other girls accepted it without verbal complaint to him.

“Guys, this is the chick from the newspaper.” He grabbed his brown bottle off the sticky rail and pulled it to his lips, taking a long sip, his eyes never leaving you.

“Hi, Y/N Holloway, I just have a couple of questions for you guys and then I’ll get out of your way.” You smiled. You watched out of the corner of your eye as your last name caused recognition flashed in his baby blues. In that moment, he knew you. Well, he knew your family. And he became a wallflower. You asked your simple questions, which were mostly about how they met and what their goals were, which the drummer declared to be ‘world domination’ while elbowing Billy in the abs, as if he would’ve laughed. He didn’t. In fact he didn’t speak at all; he just sort of stared at you, mouth open just a little, just enough to show the shock he felt. That was a confidence boost, knowing you could still shock.

You finished the interview with a sweet smile, tucking your notepad into your heavy black bag and hopped off your stool, grabbing your beer as you went. “Alright, best of look boys, see you in the papers.” You said with a wave, walking into the crowd. You had to find that spiky goth, she seemed to know more than anyone else in that room.

You found her in the corner of the room at a tiny table, fingers laced with a tiny mousy looking girl with short ash brown hair and a lazy looking smile. When you walked up, she dropped her hand out of the spiky girl’s, who simply smiled at you.

“What’s up, Holloway?” she asked, turning to fully look at you.

You furrowed your brow “You know me?”

She chuckled “Fellow Hawkins escapees don’t show up so close to hell that often, although I know you don’t recognize me. Samantha Baker.” She held out her hand for you to shake. After hearing her name, you did recognize her as the school’s only sullen goth.

“Hey,” you shook her hand, turning to address the little mouse. She seemed oddly familiar “Aren’t you Neil Buckley’s little sister? Robin right?” you asked with a grin. Neil Buckley was your first boyfriend; you spent most of your afternoons in freshman year at his house. Robin nodded, choosing to pull the cherry off her mixed drink and popped it in her mouth, pulling the red stem off and knotted it with fingers.

You turned your attention back to Samantha with a genuine grin “Look, I’m here doing a piece on local bands, specifically Hargrove’s group. You seem to know a bit about these crowds, can I get a couple quotes from you?” you asked, pulling your pad from your back pocket.

“Grab a seat, I’ll tell you anything you want.” Samantha chuckled once again.

“Sammy, what’s she want?” a strong, angry voice asked from behind you as you pulled out the high stool. You knew it was Hargrove, but you didn’t turn around.

“A couple quotes about the crazy girls who stalk you around.” She replied “You care?”

“I wanna listen and make sure you don’t say shit about me.” He muttered, grabbing an empty chair from a nearby table and pulling it close to yours. The blonde he’d been with before was gone now, to your surprise, and he was pouting in the chair next to you.

“The only thing I have to say about you is that you don’t write your own music.” Samantha replied with a shrug that made Robin roll her eyes.

“Who does?” you asked, pulling your pencil out from behind your ear.

Samantha’s chest puffed out proudly “I do. I’m their lyricist and composer.” You jotted that down fast, making a mental note to credit her for anything you liked in their music.

“Why don’t you just perform this stuff yourself then? There’s an open market for angry, gothic girl rock, much wider than the boy’s market.” You asked.

“Yeah, I can’t do what Hargrove can do to a crowd.” Samantha replied, watching as Hargrove puffed up with pride again.

“Specifically to the girls, that man can turn even the most devoted wife or girlfriend to cheat on their husbands.” Robin added with a smirk. There was clearly a story there, but you didn’t try to pull it out of them, letting sit on the surface of their knowing smiles.

“You gotta understand, these girls-they aren’t here for the music, they’re here for him. They can’t get enough.” Samantha explained, smacking him in the chest as she gestured to him. Samantha might have had too many drinks.

“So it’s just like high school again?” you chuckled, leaning your elbows on the table. You smiled at him, against your initial thinking. Sure, he was still a cocky fuck, but he wasn’t being an absolute ass now that he knew who were.

“Except, now all his songs are apologies to like three girls,” Samantha said “Instead of sex songs about whoever he’s with that week.”

You furrowed your brow “And who are these three girls?”

“Oh, that’s easy: the first one is me, his truest love thus far, a gold star lesbian,” Samantha held up fingers as she counted them off “His mom, gone but never forgotten, and Heather Holloway.”

Your mouth went dry as you between the trio. Robin looked to you apologetically as she took the martini glass from her hand. “You’ve had enough, sweetie.” She muttered.

You didn’t feel like you knew what to say, but words came tumbling out of your mouth. “What gives you the right to use my baby sister as your fucking muse? Her death isn’t something to write fucking songs about.” You snapped. Your whole body felt like it was vibrating, you were so upset.

“I didn’t know you didn’t-Hargrove you told me that she knew that she was the only one who knew.” Samantha sobered up fast, looking at Hargrove with blown out brown eyes.

“Of course you’re still a liar, Hargrove.” You scoffed, pushing yourself off the stool. You were done with this interview, screw this town and the band and any of the other ‘Hawkins escapees’ out there looking to market off your family’s pain. You pushed your way out of the awful bar and into the dark night. It had begun to rain and the air was humid. Well, there goes your hair, the rain and humidity would ruin it. You crossed your arms over your chest, protecting your bare skin from the cold rain giving you goose bumps.

“Y/N, wait a second, alright?” You turned to see Hargrove running up behind you. You wiped your face, ready to blame rain for your running mascara.

“What do you have to say now?” you bit out, slicking your wet hair back from your face.

“Look I thought Heather had told you…” he muttered.

“How the hell was she supposed to tell me about your band? She’s fucking dead.” You wiped your nose angrily, rolling your eyes at your own tears.

“No, not about the band, about…us.” He tried again and you raised an eyebrow at him. Billy sighed, his hand coming to rub the back of his neck. He looked away from you into the dark streets. There wasn’t a cab in sight. “I loved your sister. We were…seeing each other. Sort of. We weren’t official, but we were going to be. I was gonna ask her and then so much shit went down, you don’t even know the half of it. And then…she was gone.”

You didn’t know that. Heather hadn’t told you any of that. You wondered if it was in the diary from that summer. You had all her diaries bundled together in your apartment, you’d never read them; it felt too invasive to her privacy, even from beyond the grave.

“I lost my whole family, I lost my baby sister…” you muttered to yourself, unsure what else to say.

“I know and I’m sorry. But I lost her too.” Billy replied, placing firm hands on your shoulders, forcing you to look at him. For the first time, he looked like a man, not a teenage boy imitating adulthood. He looked strong and as if he knew who he was. He looked handsome, although that be the beer and raw emotion talking.

“I’m sorry…I didn’t know.” You muttered “You must miss her…”

“Yeah, sometimes…when something reminds me of her.” He replied “Like you, you remind me so much of her. Can I show you one song? It’s the one that means the most to me.” You nodded at his request and let him drag you back into the bar. He put you near the front of the stage and grabbed his guitarist, taking the microphone back into his hands.

“Hey, sorry everyone, I’m gonna do one last song. We’ve got a reporter here from the Indiana Tribune, gotta show off our best stuff, ya know?” the audience laughed at his week attempt at a joke as his bassist brought up two chairs for Billy and the guitar guy, whose name you’d forgotten.

The song itself was sweet enough, about a girl with big doe eyes and hair that always smelt like chlorine. It was totally your sister; if they’d played that first you would’ve been just as furious as you were outside, except you wouldn’t have finished the interview. This time around, you listened. You smiled at the line about her lavender perfume and how it was so strong it made you dizzy and held your breath at every chorus as he wailed “You’re all gone, you’re all gone…” with his hands holding the microphone for death life. It didn’t feel like a love song, but a dirge to a long gone muse, never forgotten and screaming from the depths of one’s soul, begging to be remembered, to be put into art. You never liked to think about your sister that way, but deep within your heart you knew this was how she wanted to be remembered. She wanted to be a model, a soap star and spokesperson. She wanted to be remembered for her beauty, to be admired. Being the muse of a budding artist would be good enough for her, she would’ve loved that.

You clapped when it was done. You let Billy pull you away from the crowd. You let him kiss you like he would’ve your sister, the lingering smell of lavender and vanilla on your skin a reminder to both of you of her. You let him hold you. It was nice to be held. It was nice for him to get to say goodbye.

You knew you looked strange to the groupies and bar goers, but he needed this. And in a way, so did you. You held him like he was your father, like you were hugging him for the last time. You didn’t like that your mind associated the two men, but you let it. You both said goodbye to your ghosts.

And were left with strangers in their places.

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unprofessionalreviews · 5 years

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Doom Days 🔺

Album by Bastille

Genre - alternative/indie

Overall - WOWOWOW, like all other Bastille albums, I love this. A couple of them are mind blowingly well written, of course I’m not that surprised though, Dan Smith is a freakin boss, we stan.

It’s a quarter past midnight:

- Honestly the imagery of adventuring through a city and watching the lights fly by is such a euphoric picture to me

- Idk if “love will tear us apart” is a song, a lyric, or something else, but i like to think it’s an idea. This young group of people singing of love and loss, whether it’s specific or not, it’s a feeling.

- This song is honestly such an anthem

- It addresses how people take for granted the lives they had when they were young and I LOVE WHEN SONGS DO THAT cause it always gets me in the feels (this is especially focused on in the chorus)

- Did I mention the chorus is A BLESSING

- “Good time, bad decisions” reflects the next song lol

BEST LYRIC ~ “We want the bodies on the billboards

Not the lives underneath them”

Bad decisions:

- right off the bat a contrast to the last song

- OH MY LORD I LOVE THIS

- “Stay forever numb” instead of young, I’m g a s p i n g

- This is already stuck in my head

- Ooo chorus is all upbeat now, we stan

- This is REEEALLY GOOD

BEST LYRIC ~ “You always let me down so tenderly

So live fast and die young and stay forever numb”

The waves:

- oooOooOO begins with angelic vocals

- Aw piano, I love that

- And them bam there’s a beat

- The CHORUS IS ACOUSTIC BLISS but then it comes down (like a wave 🌊)

- “Twilight zone” and “lost boy life” is such a good way to use allusions give the same feeling to the music and the story as those shows give the watchers

- The last chorus sounds like he’s underwater I love that

BEST LYRIC ~ “Is it an apocalypse or nihilism on your lips? We sink or swim”

Divide:

- I can FEEL this song

- Bastille love songs are rare because they make me feel so much more than the majority of bands and singers nowadays

- The verses are so short but so poignant

BEST LYRIC ~ “In these darker days, I push the limit to the love you offer

There's a riot in my head, demanding we do this forever”

Million pieces:

- I love when songs are upbeat but actually really existential lol

- We go through life ignoring the pain of the outside world cause to be fair, reality is truly sadder than anyone can ever actually handle

- The bridge encapsulates the entirety of the song

- I thought y’all should know my candle smells like Carmel rice cakes and it’s making me really happy

BEST LYRIC ~ “If it's gonna break me

Won't you let me go?

Leave it till the morning

I don't wanna know”

Doom days:

- THIS SONG GETS ME EVERY TIME

- “When i watch the world burn, all I think about is you” k i l l s m e

- This song is so real and so perfect as the titular song on the album

- “Live-streaming the final days of Rome” Lord almighty that’s a good line. This addressing not only worldly concerns like climate change but the obsession with social media this planet has fallen under, our last resort has become content creation, even when the Earth dies. Also, a good history lesson lol.

- ~ WE LOVE THE SOUND THAT OUR VOICE MAKES / MAN THIS ECHO CHAMBERS GETTING LOUD ~

- I’ve heard this song a thousand times already and here I am listening to it twice when I need to hear the rest of the album lol

- 1 intro, 1 verse, 1 chorus and a whole lot of staring off into the distance because what does it all mean anyway?

BEST LYRIC ~ “So I put my phone down

Fall into the night with you”

Nocturnal creatures:

- at first I thought this was “not tunnel creatures” LOL

- I can already tell I’m gonna be listening to this like every night

- This is good for nighttime reminiscing (which I do often)

BEST LYRIC ~ “We're nocturnal creatures, we own the night

And we don't need a reason if we want to lose our minds”

4AM:

- honestly the humming makes me feel like I’m falling asleep in a safe happy place and I love that

- “Tuesday’ll be a doom day” he says that like its the norm and I love that (also got that album title in there, we stan)

- This song makes me blissfully happy

- The outro reflects the bridge and the post- chorus of A Quarter Past Midnight and I stan

BEST LYRIC ~ “I never felt more comfortable, could never want for more when you're near”

Another place:

- the pacing is different then I would expect and I really like it

- The lyrics depict such a real relationship

- I feel t h i s

BEST LYRIC ~ “So don't make promises to me that you're gonna break

We only ever wanted one thing from this

Don't paint wonderful lies on me that wash away”

Those nights:

- Listening to this is like feeling all your loneliness grouped with every other human being’s and suddenly, you’re not alone because everyone feels the pain of those nights

- The bridge is so good wow

- OUTRO REFLECTS NEXT SONG WHICH I LOVE BECAUSE THIS ONE IS MORE EMPTY AND THE NEXT IS SO WHOLE

BEST LYRIC ~ “'cause aren't we all just

Looking for a little bit of hope these days?

Looking for somebody you can wake up with?”

Joy:

- This song is about HAVING SOMEONE which contrasts the last one which is about SEARCHING FOR SOMEONE and this song is so full and I love it

- Awwww

- What a happy ending to the album I love it so much

BEST LYRIC ~ “As the night dissolves into this final frame

You're a sweet relief, you saved me from my brain”

#unprofessional review #bastille #doom days #album #music #a quarter past midnight #bad decisions #the waves #divide #million pieces #nocturnal creatures #4am #another place #those nights #joy #dan smith #alternative #indie

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loseyoutoloveme · 4 years

Note

can you do a rundown/review of every song on folklore like you've done for selena? and what your current top 5 are??

considering this is officially one of my top 3 favourite albums ever i’m v happy to 😌! warning, absolutely every single song will be ranked 10/10

thank for wanting to know my thoughts :( i can’t believe anybody would volunteer to read this JDNSKSDJKDS

first of all, my top 5 is probbbbably gonna change (maybe not tho bc my lover top 5 hasn’t really changed a lot), but for now, i think it’s: august > seven > mad woman > illicit affairs > mirrorball

THE 1:

ngl my very first thought was that it reminded me of same love by macklemore skdjdskjdskjsd but not in a bad way!

literally some of the prettiest lyrics, i knew just from this song that this would top red as her best lyrically (best album in general)

honestly just rly sad and sweet and one of those songs that has such a universal sound i feel?

also the simplest song of the album lyrically (also not in a bad way, just like objectively this is the easiest subject matter on the album with the least opaque lyrics), so a really good opener

best lyrics: “we never painted by the numbers baby but we were making it count/you know the greatest loves of all time are over now” and “we were something don’t you think so/roaring twenties tossing pennies in the pool/and it my wishes came true it would’ve been you”

a cute girl, 10/10

CARDIGAN:

i was surprised by the darkish sound of this one

idk what that like clanking sound in the background is but i find it a lil distracting in the first half of the song - but if i ever find out what it is and it has some symbolic meaning/purpose for being there (i assume it does) i’ll accept it sdjknsd

i love the nostalgia that is so present in like almost every song on this album :(

also the music video is stunning and frames the entire album in the most interesting way, metaphor-wise

best lyrics: “i knew you’d linger like a tattoo kiss/knew you’d haunt all of my what-ifs/the smell of smoke would hang around this long/cause i knew everything when i was young/i knew i’d curse you for the longest time/chasin’ shadows in the grocery line/i knew you’d miss me when the thrill expired/and you’d be standing in my front porch light/and i knew you’d come back to me”

10/10

THE LAST GREAT AMERICAN DYNASTY:

love this one bc it’s like a nice lil exhale in an album filled with angst, like it’s cute and boppy without being aggressive

i’m suddenly absolutely obsessed with rebekah harkness, particularly the “bitch pack” thing and her dyeing someone’s dog green

i love taylor’s storytelling and i love how that’s always been a big part of her approach to songwriting. this is taylor at her best narration, like starlight but so much better. this is a type of songwriting that is so underused these days, esp by mainstream artists and i love so much that she has always used it and been so invested in it

the pronoun change made me screech. sooo goooood

taylor’s obv a deeply autobiographical artist which is why it’s so incredible to hear her tell OTHER people’s stories and somehow make them so her own. like i think it’s mostly the english major in me that just gets so emotional over that...... the way that other people’s stories became our own through the way we tell them......

this song is def the one that is most explicit about the album’s theme of telling stories but ones that tell something about her (and about her listeners too), by switching to personal pronouns at the end. it sets up a pattern for the rest of the album, where each song is about one thing (the actual story she’s telling) but also about a bunch of other things.

a good example of why she’s the greatest songwriter of this generation

best lyrics: “there goes the maddest woman this town has ever seen/she had a marvelous time ruining everything”

10/10

EXILE:

bon iver’s voice was a full shock to the system the first time i listened and idk why sdkjnds it is just so deep and i was not at all expecting it esp after the cuteness of tlgad

anyway these lyrics are GORGEOUS

i love a duet where the 2 singers’ lyrics are meant to be directed at each other. is there a word for that type of duet idk but it always makes a duet infinitely better

the miscommunication exemplified in the bridge...... chef’s kiss heartbreaking

out of all the songs this is the one that makes me feel the most like i am in the middle of a forest in winter. i can already picture myself listening to this song in december with the sound of a crackling fire in the background mmmmmmmm my exact vibe

best lyrics: “you’re not my homeland anymore/so who am i defending now?/you were my town, now i’m in exile seeing you out” and “i’m not your problem anymore/so who am i offending now?”

10/10

MY TEARS RICOCHET:

this chorus BRRROOOOKE ME

writing songs presumably about the masters situation and framing them as breakup songs was absolutely galaxy brain

i feel like the image of tears ricocheting has like a million layers to it and is just suuuuch a smart metaphor

also just such a visually rich song ? so is every song on the album but the metaphors of this song are all just so visual

best lyrics: “i didn’t have it in myself to go with grace/and you’re the hero flying around saving face/and if i’m dead to you why are you at the wake?” and “i can go anywhere i want/anywhere i want, just not home”

10/10

MIRRORBALL:

ok so i did like this one on first listen, i loved absolutely everything on first listen, but it didn’t hit my top 5 until like 8 listens later, so it’s def a big grower and i think could be a huge fan fav by next year

the self-awareness in her writing will never fail to amaze me

the way that life is just performing...... yeah

but it’s crazy to me that a person could be like “i’m a compulsive people pleaser and performer and i’ll do anything to get ppl to like me” and that leads to “i am a disco ball” like ???? her brain is so big. it’s such a gorgeous metaphor.... and the circus imagery AHHHHH

best lyrics: “i’m still on that tightrope/i’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me/i’m still a believer but i don’t know why/i’ve never been a natural, all i do is try try try/i’m still on that trapeze/i’m still trying everything to keep you looking at me” and “i can change everything about me to fit in”

10000/10

SEVEN:

this one simply rips my heart out

at first i was like oh this is so weird and then the chorus just would not leave my head

for me personally, nostalgia is literally 90% of my personality and just for so many personal reasons the thought of childhood ending and all of the growing pains that come along with that have been at the forefront of my psyche for the past year. so it just kills me whenever i find a song like this one and it kills me that taylor specifically has several songs about this topic and this is 100000% the best of them all. like it’s the most beautiful experience to have your thoughts and feelings and fears expressed so perfectly by a total stranger, and that’s rly what art is about and i love taylor for doing that for me and millions of other people

i just feel like this song brings up so many vivid beautiful memories of childhood for so many people, like being outside in the summer and screaming and being free. ugh

the pause after “i hit my peak at seven” before completing the phrase........ OOOOOOOOOF IT HITS TOO HARD

and sound-wise, just so off-beat and cool and unique

best lyrics: “i hit my peek at seven/feet in the swing across the creek” and “are there still beautiful things?” and “love you to the moon and to saturn/passed down like folk songs/the love lasts so long” and “before i learned civility/i used to scream ferociously/any time i wanted”

100000000000/10

AUGUST:

i knew immediately that this would be my favourite tbh like i could sense it the second it began

i wrote my first impression thoughts in my journal and you can tell the exact moment i got to the bridge bc i just started screaming sdnjksdkjsdn

i would 100% get a tattoo that said “to live for the hope of it all”

everything about this song is LITERALLY flawless like i have.......no notes......no thoughts.......it’s just an absolutely perfect song

best lyrics: “back when we were still changing for the better/wanting for was enough/for me it was enough/to live for the hope of it all" and “august sipped away like a bottle of wine/cause you were never mine”

100000000000000000000000000/10

THIS IS ME TRYING:

this song is rly good but i keep forgetting it exists omg :/ once i learn all of the lyrics i’ll appreciate her more

the strings are gorgeous

i was rly surprised that this one was done with jack instead of aaron just bc the bridge of this sounds SOOOO the national

these lyrics could be interpreted in so many different ways depending on the listener’s experiences and that’s beautiful

best lyrics: “i was so ahead of the curve/the curve became a sphere/fell behind all my classmates and i ended up here” and “it’s hard to be at a party when i feel like an open wound/it’s hard to be anywhere these days when all i want is you/you’re a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town”

10/10

ILLICIT AFFAIRS:

that soft high note on “down,” “stop,” etc is sooooo nice

i don’t have many thoughts on it, it’s just so soft, SOOOOOO gorgeous instrumentally and lyrically

best lyrics: “it’s born from just one single glance/but it dies and it dies and it dies/a million little times” and “don’t call me kid, don’t call me baby/look at this godforsaken mess that you made me/you showed me colours you know i can’t see with anyone else” and “you taught me a secret language i can’t speak with anyone else/and you know damn well/for you i would ruin myself/a million little times”

100000/10

INVISIBLE STRING:

like i said about tlgad, this is a nice little break from all the angst and pain and anger sdnjksdnskjsd just a sweet little break to remind u there are good things in the world too. so placed really well in the tracklist imo

super super super super cute chorus

so many pretty melodies

absolutely an autumn song btw

best lyrics: “time, mystical time/cutting me open, then healing me fine”

10/10

MAD WOMAN:

i literally lost my mind listening to this for the first time

i have such a thing for scorned women anthems like i will immediately love it whatever it is

the pure rage when she says “cause you took everything from me” gives me full body chills

it is just so eerie and haunting and perfect

best lyrics: “women like hunting witches too/doing your dirtiest work for you/it’s obvious that wanting me dead/has really brought you two together” and “every time you call me crazy i get more crazy/what about that?” and “good wives always know/she should be mad, should be scathing like me/but no one like a man woman”

1000000/10

EPIPHANY:

i find this one so hard to listen to but it’s absolutely beautiful and devastating and so heavily relevant for i think the whole world rn

the heart monitor and the trumpets tying both of the topics in together is so genius and so heartbreaking

i think will be the sygb of folklore where it makes everybody cry so much that it becomes a skip despite being a beautiful song

best lyrics: “something med school did not cover/someone’s daughter, someone’s mother” and “some things you just can’t speak about”

10/10

BETTY:

first of all THE HARMONICA

this made me so happy bc it’s just so debut and so fearless and it made me SOOOOO nostalgic on my first listen, because it really felt to me like i was getting to listen to a song from debut or fearless for the very first time again

it’s just so sweet and cute and simple and yet another very self-aware moment of looking back to her past material/subject matter

best lyrics: “would you have me? would you want me?/would you tell me to go fuck myself/or lead me to the garden?” and “i’m only seventeen, i don’t know anything/but i know i miss you”

10/10

PEACE:

the bass at the beginning is soooooo nice

this miiiiiight be the strongest song on the album lyrics-wise but idk yet

not much to say, it’s just so gorgeous

best lyrics: “i’m a fire and i’ll keep your brittle heart warm/if your cascade ocean wave blues come/all these people think love’s for show/but i would die for you in secret” and “would it be enough if i could never give you peace?” and “i talk shit with my friends, it’s like i’m wasting your honour”

10/10

HOAX:

i have a feeling this one will be underrated/underappreciated bc it’s just simple and dark and the last song, but this is....... a lyrical masterpiece

i feel like i need to be playing this on vinyl with all of the lights off and just a candle burning yknow, like there’s just something so dark and ancient about it

best lyrics: “my winless fight/this has frozen my ground” and “your faithless love’s the only hoax i believe in/don’t want no other shade of blue but you/no other sadness in the world would do” and “you knew it still hurt underneath my scars/from when they pulled me apart/but what you did was just as dark/darling this was just as hard”

10/10

OVERALL: 10000000000/10 literally one of the best albums i have ever heard and (while i wouldn’t put it past her to top it) absolutely the best work of her career. so complex and layered and emotional and painful and genuine and different. not to get ahead of myself but this is/should be considered her blue, her rumours, her abbey road....... god. can’t wait to listen to this album for the rest of my life and play it for my future children and just watch it live on as the greatest work of one of the most important artists of the 21st century

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asexualastarion · 4 years

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For the album ask game... how about The Black Parade?

oh ABSOLUTELY. i LOVE you. this is all subject to change at the drop of the hat bc im wishy-washy and i love all of these songs anyway so

this got WAY too long so i am putting it under a readmore shhvkldlkdgjlkdsj

not including b-sides:

1. Teenagers- kind of a basic pick i know, BUT, in my defense, the song slaps. it’s such a fun song, especially when you’re singing it at the top of your lungs. the guitar part is super cool too- im trying to learn it rn but it’s a slow process bc im bad at guitar.

2. Mama- what can i say. it fucks. the old time-y feel, the harmonies/background vocals, the layers. the guitar goes so fucking hard. banging lyrics- “you should’ve raised a baby girl, i should have been a better son”??????? songs to be trans to.”but the shit that i’ve done with this fuck of a gun” is the kind of lyric that you can only properly convey if you’re screaming it at the top of your lungs. the whole ending is just. mind blowing

3. The End.- LISTEN!!!!!!!!! the end is WAY TOO FUCKING UNDERRATED!!!! oh my goddd i love it so much. i love it SO much. it’s such a perfect beginning to the song. the lyrics are great (”now come one, come all, to this tragic affair” if you look in the mirror and don’t like what you see, you can find out first hand what it’s like to be me”, “another contusion, my funeral jag. here’s my resignation, i’ll serve it in drag. you’ve got front row seats to the penitence ball, when i grow up, i want to be NOTHING AT ALL!!! SAVE ME!!! GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!!! SAVE ME!!! TOO YOUNG TO DIE, AND MY DEAR!!! IF YOU CAN HEAR ME JUST WALK AWAY AND TAKE ME!!). the bit with the snapping and the ooooohs is fun too. such a good song, it could honestly be 1 or 2 but my ranking system isnt based in logic and makes no sense to even myself

4. House of Wolves- house of wolves was my favorite mcr song for a good chunk of time, but as a result i’m kinda burned out on it, which is why it isn’t higher. however it is still number four because it’s objectively a fucking amazing song. the guitar is so fuckin fun, the lyrics are great, and it’s just. fun to dance around and sing it at the top of your lungs. you better run like the devil cause they’re never gonna leave you alone!!!!! tell me i’m a bad, bad, bad, bad man!!!

5. Welcome to the Black Parade- the big man itself. the titular song. their biggest hit. a lot of people shit on wttbp for being popular and, like, pretty much the only song of theirs to ever be on the radio anymore (and even then it’s once in a blue moon), BUT. it got popular for a reason. it’s a really good song. i love the structure of it, i love how it builds and builds and builds. the lyrics are wonderfully done- “a world that sent you reelin from decimated dreams/ your misery and hate will kill us all”, the whole “do or die, you’ll never make me” stanza is The Ultimate rallying cry. and the “im just a man, i’m not a hero” is just. ughghghdlkslakdjglsdkg. the titular song of an album entirely about death and dying and misery being SO hopeful and SO upbeat really portrays the album as a whole much differently- mcr is known as The Emo Band because, yeah, their aesthetic is dark and their songs touch dark stuff but they have never been all whiney and boo-hoo-y and melancholic for the sake of melancholy. there’s always been a positive note to their music and a lot of people just don’t get that which makes me sad. anyway. wttbp is fun and i like it and i like the drums and the trumpets at the end. marching bands fuck

6. Blood- ok so the pattern here seems to be that i favor the fun songs over the slow ones, and blood sticks with that. much like with mama, i love the old time-y feel. i love that this is like a fun little bonus ditty to end the album on. the lyrics are silly and fun and jovial, and the piano is great. love it and it makes me happy

7. Disenchanted- OUGHH. OUUUUUGH. i know cancer is objectively the saddest song on the album, but disenchanted just hits different. “when the lights all went out, we watched our lives on the screen/ i hate the ending myself, but it started with an alright scene” just DECIMATES me, man. the acoustic guitar is a nice change of pace, and the vocal performance is just. so fucking emotional. especially the “woahhhhhhhh-ohs” at the end. great song, makes me Feel Emotions

8. The Sharpest Lives- ok so i know this is pretty much in the middle of the list, but i want to stress that i dont hate any of the songs on this album, so even the middle of the list is pretty fuckin good imo. the sharpest lives makes me go batshit. the lyrics are so fucking wild. “a light to burn all the empires, so bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be” is SO fuckin sick like OH my god. what a line. also “there’s a place in the dark where the animals go/ you can take off your skin in the cannibal glow/ juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands/ drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, romeo” like WHAT?????????????? GERARD POPPED OFF W THIS ONE FOLKS!! also i love how at the beginning the whisper-y vocals bounce from ear to ear. also “so why don’t you blow me......a kiss before she goes” is fuckin hilarious. honestly this song should be higher but i havent gone through a phase where i’ve been obsessed w it yet so it stays down here for now. one day it will take hold and be all i can listen to for a month straight and THEN it will climb the ranks.

9. Cancer- makes me cry like a liddol baby. my mom doesnt let it play in the car cause it makes her too sad. twenty one pilots covered it and it was FUCKING AWFUL so the song is kinda ruined now cause i can only think about their shitty cover. like the AUDACITY. but anyway besides that the song is heart wrenching and amazing. the hardest part of this is leavin you!!!!

10. Dead!- look, i know technically the end. and dead! are the same song/ are just continuations of each other but i’m listing them separately bc dead! is, to me, the worse of the two. not that it’s bad or anything, it just doesn’t pop off the same way the end. and all the songs before it on the list do. however i do love the guitar at the beginning and the solo, and the “one! two! one two three four! LA LA LA LAs” are super fucking fun.

11. Famous Last Words- i used to hate this song!!!! i truly did!! it’s obvs not on the top of my list now or anything, but i have grown to appreciate it a lot more than i used to. like with wttbp, it is the silver lining of the album that betrays its optimistic side. it’s a happy final message to a dark album. the ending is fucking amazing. I am not afraid to keep on living!!!! i am not afraid to walk this world alone!!!!!!

12. Sleep- Sleep is, unfortunately, just kinda boring in comparison. i almost forgot to even put it on the list. however, i do like the “the hardest part’s the awful things that i’ve seen” and the “a drink, for the horrors that i’m in. for the good guys and the bad guys, for the monsters that i’ve been” lines. also the “three cheers for tyranny, unapologetic apathy!” line. but overall it’s just. eh

13. This is How I Disappear- i have. complicated feelings on tihid. on one hand, it reminds me of my favorite oc, re, and is on their playlist. on the other hand, i have grown bored with it over time. it just doesn’t stand out to me at all really. that being said, i do really like the “who walks among the famous living dead” and the “can you hear me cry out to you” stanzas.

14. I Don’t Love You- while i dont think idly is a bad song at all, it just simply isnt my kind of song. i do think gerard’s vocals are extremely strong throughout, especially during the “when you go, would you have the guts to say/ i don’t love you like i loved you yesterday” line. like wow ok maam please continue. but overall i just dont vibe w breakup songs bc i cant relate

including b sides: 1. Heaven Help Us

2. Kill All Your Friends

3. Everything else

4. My Way Home is Through You

my reasoning:

heaven help us is tied for my favorite mcr song Of All Time. everything about this song is catnip for lil old me. the angsty christian imagery, the vocals, the guitar. all of it. the lyrics make me lose my mind, especially the “will you pray for me? or make a saint of me? and will you lay for me? or make a saint of- cause i’ll give you all the nails you need/cover me in gasoline/ wipe away those tears of blood again/ and the punchline to the joke is asking ‘SOMEONE SAVE US’” and the “you don’t know a thing about my sins/ or the misery begins/ you don’t know, so i’m burnin! I’m burnin!!!” parts. like i absolutely vibe with this song so fucking hard. i sing it constantly, it’s great to sing (very stimmy for me), it sounds beautiful. i am obsessed with it through and through

similarly, kill all your friends also speaks to my very soul. i can’t pick favorite lyrics bc id just have to copy and paste the whole song. i love the build-up, i love the time progression throughout the song (it’s been TEN FUCKING YEARS since i’ve been seein your faaaaaace rounnnnnd heeeere), i love the “you’ll never take me alives”. literally everything about this song makes me emo. it just Gets Me. it’s literally about my greatest fear. all my friends growing up and moving away and getting on with their lives without me, leaving me to rot in my hometown waiting for them to return. we only see each other at weddings and funerals, so it’s time to kill all your friends so we can party when the funeral ends!! it’s probably tied with heaven help us, but i’m putting it at number two just because it didn’t hook me as strongly as hhu did. it’s more of a strong, steady favorite than a “this song has latched on to my very soul and i have to listen to it on repeat over and over and over again”, if that makes sense. it’s still in my top 5 mcr songs though

i never vibed with my way home is through you. i don’t listen to it often, and i just don’t really feel it. it’s not bad, it’s just. eh.

anyway if you’ve read this far down i love you so much. thank you for listening to me ramble, mcr means a lot and i love to infodump about my music tastes. i really really appreciate being given an opportunity to do so <3

#mcr #asks #anon #SERIOUSLY. ILY. MWAH.

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hitchfender · 5 years

Text

@wishforwishes and i were discussing this ages ago, and i’ve finally worked up the courage to do my official ranking of 1989 (deluxe). without further ado:

1. out of the woods 2. style 3. you are in love 4. welcome to new york 5. shake it off 6. blank space 7. wonderland 8. wildest dreams 9. this love 10. how you get the girl 11. i wish you would 12. i know places 13. all you had to do was stay 14. new romantics 15. clean 16. bad blood

to complete this list, i listened to the album in order and wrote a paragraph with my impressions of each track; then i went back and ranked them. i worked very hard on it, and it turned out very long, so it’s all under a read more! please send opinions and reactions ❤️ love u

welcome to new york - honestly, this song is just so fun. the beat drops smooth and satisfying, and when she yells “new york!” just before the bridge it feels like a shout of freedom. the track is lyrically thin, but that doesn’t mean the lyrics are bad, and i think taylor communicated everything she wanted to with them; this first song invites us into the album, and sets us up for a pop-flavoured story of “real love that drives you crazy.”

blank space - this is taylor at her most sardonic and self-aware, tongue firmly planted in her cheek as she sings about bad boys and loving the game. some of her imagery falls flat, and that repetitive drumbeat grates after a few verses, but man, that tongue click was a stroke of genius: bringing the listeners into her world with insolence and irony.

style - this guitar knocks me off my feet every time. here’s where she makes her 80s influences most keenly felt, and where she brings that imagery she’s so famous for to the foreground. she paints her experience with a combination of broad strokes and achingly specific detail, and when it’s over you feel drained and renewed, like at the end of a long drive through beautiful, dangerous terrain.

out of the woods - i don’t know what to say about this one that i haven’t already said, so here it is again. reading the lyrics this song feels almost manic, the chorus losing its meaning and becoming a frenetic howl, the stories she’s telling disassociated and too-sharp, like shards of memories. once you get to the bridge, it starts to sound that way, too - she switches from the more complicitous “we” to an accusatory “you,” and she starts making demands - yet even in this moment of fear and anger there’s tenderness: a sunrise and shared tears. when she seizes her agency with that “oh, i remember” i feel some primal emotion lodge itself like a bullet in my chest.

all you had to do was stay - although i like the way she transitions from vindictive to tender and back again (“you were all i wanted / but not like this / not like this”), the lyrics feel a bit repetitive and the upbeat mood detracts from the meaning she’s trying to express.

shake it off - RIGHTS for these trumpets. and the giggle. some of the vocabulary feels a little forced (hella good hair?), and the production is oddly gapped - there are breaks in the ambient sound that force you to focus on her singing, but this isn’t her best vocal work... but, like, i think i’m concentrating on the wrong thing here. this is a song about letting go of the hate, literally intended for you to lose your mind to in your room at 3 am. i can’t fault the concept.

i wish you would - this start sounds a lot like the opening of style, actually, and these spaced-out electronic drums are straight off ootw. fascinating. moving on: this sounds like a diary entry, which is extremely taylor, but it makes the song come off a bit disconnected. love that line about “a crooked love in a straight line down,” but by the end i’m left with no distinct emotional impression. also literally forgot about it when i was trying to rank the songs.

bad blood - (i know it’s not on the album but i can’t not critique the kendrick verses. “pov of you and me, similar iraq”: L. i like the nod to backstreet freestyle tho.) anyway i feel like i would be more fuck-feminism about this whole thing if it slapped harder, but as it is i’m falling asleep a bit. album version especially. sorry ms swift!

wildest dreams - that’s more fucking like it. this is probably in my top 10 of her songs, from any album. every line of this! the imagery! the dreamy vibes! the way the bridge hits and she lets loose all of that fierceness she’s been holding back (”burn it down”)! i love how the sunset line parallels her own red and rosy makeup, and the dreamy feeling that conveys. also one time i had sex to this song and it was exactly as transcendent as you’d imagine, so.

how you get the girl - i’ll admit i’m not a massive fan of taylor’s favoured “ah” exclamations, but i’ll let em slide because this song goes off. hygtg accomplishes what ayhtdws set out to do: contrasting message and tone with just the right amount of attitude. i love the narrative in this one, too - she tells a clear story with subtle changes to the verses and the chorus. also the sudden vulnerability in her voice when she sings “i don’t want you to go” is like a shock of cold water. masterful.

this love - i can never decide how i feel about this track. the chorus looks almost ridiculous on paper - “this love is good / this love is bad”, seriously? - but god, she sells it, and just like in ootw the ohhs help to create that dreamlike atmosphere. the water metaphors mirror the seagulls on the album cover, by the way, which: mind.

i know places - right off the bat this piano and the way the drums come in late remind me of kanye’s “runaway” - a mirrored version of it, maybe. "runaway” is a warning - he’s laying himself bare, telling his lover he doesn’t plan on changing, exhorting her to run while she can. taylor’s version is a statement of fierce intent: it’s about isolating yourself from the world, making the almost violent choice to remain with your lover despite everything else. they’re songs about escape, but not escapism. anyway i like this song because it’s about harry styles.

clean - this one is boring somehow. like i get it, water metaphors, but the ah-ahs are getting on my nerves again and “hung my head as i lost the war” seems a bit self-consciously understated. maybe i just haven’t felt the specific feeling she’s writing about yet, but until i do this one will remain low on my list.

wonderland - she’s trying to get across this fierce “us against the world” thing, but there’s not enough of taylor’s specialty: those razor-sharp details that make her music feel both universal and infinitely personal. wonderland is all vague allusions to green eyes and getting lost together, full of sound and fury but not signifying much. i am into the i-am-a-woman-and-i-am-fucking-crazy thing, but i need a bit more from her.

you are in love - am i strong enough for this? we’ll see. this track’s got it all -lyrics clean as anything from her earlier discography, backed by those synths that are 80s without feeling like pastiche. i’m obsessed with the dynamics; her choice to use or remove the backing vocals emphasises her own voice, brings out its flaws and makes the song (though it’s quite production-heavy) feel raw. she makes use of her favourite trick, little snatches of memories creating a pointillist picture, but the most affecting line comes (as with so many of her best songs) in the bridge: “you understand now ... why i’ve spent my whole life trying to put it into words.” it’s the only time she mentions herself on this self-effacing track, and the effect is immediate and startling - suddenly we’re in taylor’s shoes, watching a beautiful relationship unfold from the outside, and after a full album of songs about a fragile, doomed love affair, that line lends “you are in love” new depth.

new romantics - i have whiplash but WE’RE ALL BORED! taylor once again proves she’s never read the scarlet letter. come to think of it, a whole lot of these lyrics don’t make sense, so... yup, just googled and max martin and shellback cowrote this one. side effect: it sounds great, and the words are secondary. the old taylor pops out on the bridge to remind us of her broken-heart fantasies (“please leave me stranded”), but it sounds more like parody than ever - maybe that’s growth? a bit like blank space, this track is glaringly self-aware, like she’s daring her critics to condemn her for the foibles she already knows about, and delights in. i don’t hold it against her. god knows she’s earned a little indulgence.

tagging @roseringharrie @complicatedbabyhoneyfreak @faithmp3 @carefisher @dyketaylorswift @harrysdimples @rainbowfragrance13 (hi and welcome!) @harrystylesep @winoharry @archer-wilde @haaaaaaarrry because at some point we’ve liked each other’s taylor swift posts and/or you’ve been very nice while i yelled incoherently about her. love you all more than words and stream lover xoxoxo

#taylor swift #this legitimately... took months (and months of back and forth) which is my fault entirely #love you ian can't wait to hear what you think!!!

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violetsmoak · 5 years

Text

Philtatos [7/?]

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20101543/chapters/47630773

Blanket Disclaimer

Summary: During a patrol where Red Hood and Red Robin cross paths, Jason is infected with the blood of the Eros, the ancient God of Love, who informs them that they must track down his missing bow and arrows, or Jason will go slowly mad with an obsessive desire–for Tim. Though overwhelmed by the sudden attention being paid to him, Tim sets to work trying to solve the case, before Jason succumbs to madness. In the meantime, Jason discovers that there’s more than godlike powers at work here, as well as a legacy that reaches back through the sands of time.

Rating: PG-13 (rating may change later)

Beta Reader: None at the moment.

JayTimBingo Prompts This Chapter: #fate #fatal flaw #oracle #reincarnation #secrets #undying love

First Chapter

Author's Note(s): Sorry for the delay guys. Between trying to find a place to live, and dealing with a family member with Alzheimers, the past day or so has kind of sucked. But I did finally get some time to myself to finish this chapter, so I hope you enjoy!

Much of the dialog and imagery of Jason’s flashback is based on actual lines from The Iliad and Madeline Miller's novel The Song of Achilles. If you're looking to cry, read the latter to the end.

________________________________________________________________

Tim stares at the screen of his tablet, reading the information but none of it registering. He’s been at this too long.

Crime scene photos from the GCPD’s system and coroners reports from half a dozen murder-suicides that took place throughout the city in the past week, each one more brutal than the last. One guy took a meat pounder to his girlfriend’s head; another a fire poker to his husband’s face.

I wish I could get out there and investigate the scenes myself.

He’s been effectively benched and it’s starting to give him cabin fever, even though he knows it’s important to stay with Jason right now.

Bruce took off to Amsterdam about an hour again; like Tim, he prefers to retrace crimes from their origin. It’s how they find clues the cops miss. Dick’s doing the same right now in Gotham, revisiting all the crime scenes with Duke by his side in case his retrocognition can help them any. He has no idea where Steph is tonight, but if Barbara’s radio silence is any indicator, they’re probably working something big together.

Jason’s been sitting beside him on the couch in the study, three separate books open on his lap and a notepad where he’s jotting down various comparisons of the information.

(Because “I’m not defacing a first edition version of Les Métamorphoses, especially not one with etchings by Picasso, Tim. It’s just not done.”)

The first hour he managed to keep absorbed in his task, but Tim’s noticed him stopping more often between annotations, rubbing at a spot on his neck or over the spot in his shoulder where he was shot.

Whenever he notices Tim looking, they both immediately look away and go back to work; but after another period of research—getting shorter and shorter after each pause—Jason’s back to twitching and looking guilty.

He’s going to have his neck rubbed raw in another hour.

Despite the fact the whole thing was Tim’s idea, it’s harder to remain unaffected about the need for physical contact than he thought. And Jason notices pretty fast that Tim isn’t as at ease with the ‘treatment’ plan as he’s been insinuating.

He thought Jason putting his arm around his shoulders earlier was mostly to bother Dick, whose attempts at protectiveness had just made the situation more awkward. But when Jason does it again later, unthinkingly draping himself around Tim’s shoulder, Tim can’t help going stiff as a board.

Jason pulls away immediately, as if he’s been burned. “Sorry.”

“No, it’s…fine.”

“Stop lying, obviously you’re not,” Jason answers, shifting to the other edge of the couch to put at least three feet between them. “You don’t have to force yourself to do this. I can get through it without you.”

Tim sets aside his tablet. “Because that worked out so well the first time you tried it.”

“Yeah, well, it doesn’t matter. I’m more than capable of figuring out how to get through this without using your skin as a security blanket.” He pauses. “That came out so much disturbing than I intended.”

“How was it ever not going to sound disturbing?” Tim wonders, and then sighs. “Look, I don’t mind. The longer you stay in a healthy headspace, the more time we have to find a cure.”

“Yeah, but if you’re so friggen uncomfortable with it—”

“I’m not!”

“Bullshit.”

“No, really, it’s fine. It’s my choice.”

“Yeah, say that without flinching and maybe I’ll believe you,” Jason mutters, shoulders slumping. “If you’re going to freeze up every time I go near your personal bubble, screw it. Like I don’t feel like enough of a creep…”

Tim can see how much he hates this, the fact that he’s making Tim uncomfortable—the fact that making Tim uncomfortable upsets him at all. He’s never cared before; it’s always been a kind of unofficial hobby.

But now that his brain and hormones are becoming compromised, it’s more important to him than ever not to cross boundaries. Or at least what he perceives as boundaries.

Tim bows his head.

He’s been managing his feelings about all this by remaining clinical, dividing him from the particulars of the situation the way he’s always done. It’s the sort of thing that works on hard cases, the kind involving little kids or serial murders. He forgot that it doesn’t work so well when dealing with people.

Communication, he remembers Steph chiding him during one argument. Honesty.

Nodding to himself, Tim forces himself to appear relaxed.

“It’s not like that. I just—I’ve never been really good at all the…” He waves his hand, searching for the words, “…physical intimacy stuff.”

Jason blinks, not having expected that. “Oh.”

“Yeah.” Tim shifts. “I know it’s hard to tell when I’m next to Dick or Steph or someone who…”

“Who has personal space issues?”

“Yeah. But with them I’ve gotten used to it. But with you, you’ve never exactly…”

“Put hands on you except to lay you out flat on the floor?” Jason suggests, and then turns red. “I mean beating the crap out of you! Not the other thing that…! Fuck, he wasn’t kidding about the innuendo thing, was he?”

“Oh, I don’t know. If not for everything going on, I’m pretty sure you’d still be making jokes to make everyone uncomfortable,” Tim muses, his own ears warm at the accidental image Jason’s words provided.

Jason tilts his head to one side, and then nods. “Fair.”

They smirk at each other for a moment. Then something thoughtful passes across Jason’s face.

“What?”

“When you say physical intimacy,” Jason starts slowly, “d’you mean just occupying someone else’s personal space, or…?”

He trails off, and it takes a few seconds before Tim interprets the meaning. His cheeks may actually be on fire right now. “Uh…”

“You’re kidding.”

“Well, the first one’s always kind of an issue,” Tim mumbles, looking away, “so I don’t really—like I said, I’m not used to anyone wanting to get close to me, let alone actually trying it. Which always made everything kind of awkward.”

“And the second thing?”

“…that made it awkward, too.”

“So, you haven’t—? Like, not even with Blondie?”

There’s incredulity there, but no judgment, which is somewhat of a relief; he’s too used to other guys looking like he should have his man card revoked for not pouncing on a gorgeous girl like Steph.

As if anyone would ever get away with pouncing without getting a brick to the face.

But Jason seems genuinely curious, which makes Tim want to try to answer.

“No?” Tim winces at the uncertainty in the word and glances up to make sure there’s still no judgment on Jason’s face. “Not because—not because I didn’t—or she wasn’t—we fooled around, but never—she’d already done the whole unwanted pregnancy thing. We wanted to be careful and wait until we were both sure we wanted to. And then she died, then came back because she wasn’t really dead, and we broke up. But it was a long time ago, and then we never got another opportunity because—well, there was Bruce dying and not dying, and other people dying, and then losing Robin, and just…” He lets his words trail as he realizes he’s been babbling. “Sorry. Babbling.”

Jason makes a dismissive gesture. “Nah, it’s cute.”

There’s a moment where they both process his words, and then Jason’s rubbing at his neck and Tim’s coughing because he thinks he might have choked on his tongue.

“I’m going to…” Jason stands, starts rummaging through his pockets, and then jerks his head toward the balcony, “Smoke break.”

“Right,” Tim answers, carefully neutral.

Tim doesn’t complain about the smoking, even though he hates it. Jason’s under enough stress right now, if the nicotine helps calm him even a little a bit, Tim can put up with it for the short-term.

Not like he’s going to be around once we fix all this.

He lets Jason make his escape and for the first time since the conversation began, takes a full breath.

It’s just Eros’ blood. He doesn’t actually think that.

The truth doesn’t make his heart stop fluttering.

“Fuck,” he mutters, letting his face fall into his hand; he rubs at his face in frustration.

“Wallowing in your failure as usual, Drake?”

He jumps and then shoots a glare across the room at the pint-sized bane of his existence.

“Why aren’t you out terrorizing the streets of Gotham?”

“I’m here to ensure the present status quo endures and neither you nor Todd end up compromised,” Damian retorts. Then Tim blinks, the kid smirks at him. “I’m babysitting you two morons.”

“Well my life just hit another low…”

“I have also been doing research of my own to pass the time, since my talents are being ignored in favor of mundane surveillance tasks,” the boy continues. “I was intrigued at Todd’s apparent symptoms of xenoglossia and decided to peruse the security footage to see what might have precipitated it.”

“…And?”

“It wasn’t until you arrived that it started. He called you philtatos. It means ‘most beloved’.”

Tim tries not to choke. “How do you know that?”

“Anyone who has read the Iliad in the original Greek could tell you that,” Damian drawls.

“Well, excuse me, I had an education meant for this millennium.” Tim tries not to croak, running his hands through his hair in frustrations. The strands are stringy today and he tries to remember when he washed it last was; probably before Jason was brought to the manor.

“Odd that he’d call you that, though,” Damian continues. “He has that habit of assigning the most absurd monikers to anyone within a ten-foot radius. It’s not exactly the type of thing he would say. And to you of all people.”

Tim frowns, ignoring the insult. “You think it’s a symptom of the infection?”

“Perhaps. The term itself, or the tongue in question. In case you were curious, which I doubt since unless it involves a computer your interest becomes depressingly cursory, the language Todd was mumbling in while drooling on your shoulder was Archaia Makedonike.”

“English, brat.”

“Ancient Macedonian, you classless twit. The language itself was prevalent in the Hellenistic period before giving way to its superior successor, Koine, when it was brought by the military forces of Alexander the Great.”

“Conqueror of the known world at the time—why am I not surprised you’re so well-versed.”

“Tt. Of course I am. As a child, Mother brought me on a journey to follow in his footsteps along what was once his Empire.”

You’re still a child, Tim doesn’t say, because he just doesn’t have the energy for the inevitable resulting fight. “Sounds like quality family bonding time.”

“It was meant to show me all that could be achieved in a short lifetime,” Damian sniffs. “And what could be lost just as easily.”

“Because he died young?”

“Not only that, but because of his rather questionable decisions. Like pouring a considerable amount of his treasury into a funeral monument for one of his generals. He was so besotted with the man he died less than a year later. It’s disgraceful.”

“Right, because caring about someone is a bad thing.”

“It is possible to care without being ruled by one’s emotions.”

“Yeah, you’re such an excellent example of that,” Tim deadpans. At Damian’s glare, he makes a defensive gesture with his hand. “What do you want me to say? People do weird stuff for the people they care about.”

Damian narrows his eyes. “Evidently.”

He continues to watch Tim in a way he’s not entirely sure he likes. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“It sounds like you’ve got something to say.”

Jason chooses that moment to return, although he halts in the door when he notices the way Tim and Damian are glaring at one another. “Am I walking in on something here?”

“I was simply demonstrating Drake’s continued ignorance in several arenas,” Damian replies, and pushes past Jason. “I’ve wasted enough of my day pandering to your nonsense. Shout if you need help.” His gaze lingers on Jason with disgust. “Or possibly a firehose.”

“Was that demon-speak for ‘make good choices’?” Tim calls after him and noticing Jason’s bemused expression offers a half shrug. “He will do great things.”

“See, I knew all that getting on his case was just your way of showing you like him,” Jason teases and settles back on the couch. Much closer to Tim this time, body angled toward him; he can smell leather and the acrid smell of cigarettes.

He forces a grin, “Tell no one.”

“Lips are sealed,” Jason replies, abruptly stretching out and tucking a stray strand of hair behind his ear.

The gesture would normally make Tim want to melt, to bend closer to Jason as well; at first it does, but the reason for it remains starkly in his mind, and instead his skin crawls.

The study suddenly seems too small, too close, magnified by Jason’s focus on him.

Need a distraction.

“There’s a lot of CCTV footage to go through,” he says, clearing his throat and standing quickly. He ambles over to the desk to grab Bruce’s laptop, holding up to Jason. “Feel like going through half?”

“Not particularly, but only because that’s the most boring job ever.”

“And reading scholarly articles dissecting the exact syntax of some ancient play isn’t?”

“Don’t act like if it was Klingon or something you wouldn’t have a field day.”

But Jason accepts the computer, putting his books and notes to one side. Tim exhales a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

They sit in silence again for a while, one that’s somehow more tense than earlier. Tim’s stomach keeps leaping, waiting for the next time Jason needs to reach out to him, simultaneously craving and dreading it.

So it’s no surprise that he physically jolts when Jason suddenly announces, “I think I’ve got something.”

“What?” he asks quickly, hoping his reaction wasn’t that noticeable. He moves to peek over Jason’s shoulder, considering a timestamped video of an Upper East Side apartment. There’s a crowd gathered outside as paramedics load two covered stretchers into an ambulance.

“Right there.” Jason points at a grainy image in the upper left corner, almost obscured by the lighting. “See this woman?”

Tim studies the image of the woman in a leather jacket and skin-tight pants. “Yeah?”

“That’s Carrie Cutter.”

“Carrie…” Tim consults his mental rolodex. “Carrie Cutter as in Cupid?”

“Yep.”

“You’re sure?”

“Positive. I’m pretty familiar with anyone Roy might have had beef with down in his corner of the world. You know, just in case.”

Which is a smart thing to do, really, considering old enemies always have a tendency to return when they’re least expected.

And just…great. Because Carrie Cutter, along with being crazy to the point of earning honorary Arkham status, also happens to be a genetically enhanced special-ops soldier that knows how not to be found. If she’s got her hands on divine weapons somehow, it’s going to make apprehending her much more of a challenge.

Especially those weapons. If any of us get tagged with those, we’re done. I’ve been around when the Family gets turned against each other, and it’s never pretty.

The memory of Joker’s macabre dinner party still makes him gag reflexively.

Tim leans forward, balancing his weight on the desk with his palms, and studies the image again. “Could be a coincidence.”

“Has anything about all this felt coincidental to you?”

“Touché.” Tim shakes his head. “Damn. So, Cupid stole Cupid’s bow and arrows?”

What even is my life anymore?

“And the MO makes sense now, if you think about it,” Jason points out; he absently starts to rub the back of Tim’s hand with his thumb. Tim swallows and fights the conflicting urge to jerk his hand away or lean further into Jason’s space. “She has that whole crazed ‘if-I-can’t-be-happy-no-one-can’ thing going on. If she’s got Eros’ diviners, she could accomplish whatever she wants pretty easily.”

“Does she still have that obsession with Green Arrow?”

“Wouldn’t surprise me.”

“Maybe we should let Oliver know she’s heading his way.”

“Or not.”

“Jason!”

“No, seriously, hear me out, this isn’t me hating on Queen.”

“Sure…”

“Look at the pattern of robberies and deaths—if she’s headed out west, she’s taking the long way and at a slow stroll. There are tons of direct flights from Amsterdam to Star City. She could be there in like a day if that’s her goal, but she’s moving so slowly—based on the places she’s hit, and how long it takes her to get there, I’d say she’s driving.” He traces a line from Europe to the East Coast. “And possibly taking a boat. Not the Carnival way, either. I know people like to go incognito sometimes, but even that’s Bruce levels of paranoid.”

“And he once rode a goat truck across the border of Qurac…”

“Also, there are more direct routes from here to the West Coast.”

“So why come to Gotham at all,” Tim says, and steeples his fingers. “Either she’s taking her time for a reason, or she was never heading for Star City.”

“Then what does she want?”

“And how has she dropped so completely off the radar since she got here?”

Jason shrugs and leans back, stretching his arms and yawning; his arm brushes against Tim’s shoulder on its way down.

“When’s the last time you slept?” Tim asks quickly, wishing his voice didn’t sound like it was squeaking.

“Like sleep or power naps? Because I’ve had a lot of those.”

Tim rolls his eyes. “If you don’t get some rest we’ll have more to worry about than accidental innuendos. You should get some sleep.”

“The irony of you telling anyone that…”

“I’ve never had to fight off an Olympian bloodborne disease.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not exactly comfortable falling asleep right now. I keep seeing weird shit.”

“Like what?”

“I…can’t even remember. The whole thing just gives me a bad feeling.”

“You want to stay in my room?” This time it’s Jason who jumps and shoots Tim a panicked look. “Not like that! I just figured; it’s got all my stuff there. People sometimes take comfort in objects, and I just figured maybe being surrounded by my stuff would help. And I somehow don’t see you as the teddy bear type.”

Jason barks out a surprised laugh. “Hey, leave Paddington out of this!”

“You didn’t actually have a stuffed toy named Paddington!”

“Not just a stuffed toy, I’ll have you know, it was actually a Paddington Bear,” Jason retorts. “My mother used to read the stories to me, and she found him in a second-hand shop the Christmas before she…” Jason trails off, the levity in his face smoothing into careful blankness. “Anyway. I pretended like I was too old for stuff like that, but I was just happy she was lucid enough to even do Christmas that year.”

Tim can’t help the way his eyes soften at the story. He’s never heard Jason say anything about his life before Bruce, at least nothing personal.

Jason seems to notice the scrutiny, because he looks away. “Anyway. Not important. But we can try that whole…staying in your room thing. It would be nice to catch some Zs.”

They pack up their things and head down the hall to Tim’s room; all the while, Tim is trying to figure out what possessed him to suggest this. It’s true, comfort objects are a thing, but he could just as easily have brought a whole bunch of his stuff to Jason’s room for the same effect.

Except Jason doesn’t go near his room unless he’s unconscious and Bruce puts him there to recover.

He flicks on the light as Jason brushes past. “I haven’t been here in a while, so Alfred’s probably changed the sheets and everything. Good to go if you want to sleep.”

“And, uh…you’ll stay, right?”

“Yeah,” Tim replies softly. “At least until you fall asleep, then I have to take care of a few things. Alfred will probably nag me to eat and shower and changes clothes or something.”

And I need to make a trip home to have a conversation with my unwanted houseguest.

“Oh, the horror,” Jason says neutrally, though he starts rubbing at the back of his neck again, irritating the already red skin there.

Tim reaches over automatically and moves his hand away. A week ago, doing that would have probably gotten him punched; now Jason simply lets him, his body unconsciously leaning toward him.

“Listen, if you wake up and I’m not in here, don’t freak out. I’m probably in the kitchen being force-fed grits or something. And if I’m not, just call me and I’ll find you. We can even FaceTime while you wait.”

“Whatever,” Jason says, trying to sound nonchalant. He plops himself down on Tim’s bed, then frowns down at the bedsheet. “Holy shit this is soft.”

“It should be, it’s got a thread count of a thousand.”

“Spoiled ass rich boy,” Jason mutters, lying back on the bed. A surprised and pleased expression appears on his face. “Okay you know what? Forget obsessing over you, I want your bedroom set.”

This time it’s Tim who gives a surprised laugh.

⁂

“I will not be humiliated before my army.”

The lord marshal’s face resembles a misshapen beat, fury twisting his features; the skin beneath his nose is raw from the scented oils he’s been using to block the acrid scent of the funeral pyres. Jason has mostly become familiar with the odor by now—smoke and burning flesh and blood.

“What humiliation is there in appeasing the gods?” he counters and is surprised his voice remains so calm and measured; Tim is a reassuring presence at his back.

“Returning Chryses’ daughter is tantamount to the theft of my rightly taken trophy,” the king of men snarls. “Find me a replacement and I may consider it, but I will not be the only man among us without a prize.”

The quiet among the men is pointed, saturated with disagreement; even the obstinate man’s brother does not stand with him on the dais where kings and their liegemen have gathered. But Jason knows no one will step forward to say anything.

Only me, as usual.

“Son of Atreus, you know as well as anyone that we take our prizes from lawful combat. There’s ample opportunity to replace the girl, or even her worth in gold, three and four times over. All of us who stand here are kings and the vassals of kings, and we don’t owe you compensation when it was you who angered the gods in the first place.”

By taking the girl whose life I was trying to save just to screw me over, I would add.

A few of the men nod at his words; in the background, the moaning cries of the dying fill the air, a cacophony that has haunted the shore for ten days since the plague hit.

“Show your men that you’re as humble in nature as you are proficient in battle, and make amends.” He doubts the pig will notice the insult there. “End this plague before more die.”

Fury contracts the other man’s pupils to fine dots. “You will learn your place, boy. Just because divine blood runs through your veins and your mother raised you to believe you are special does not mean you might speak to me as an equal.” Jason bristles but is immediately cut off again. “Silence! I have no interest in whatever clever words your puppet master would have you speak.”

The blunt insult instead of flowery political doublespeak is surprising enough to still the words on his lips. He senses when Tim stiffens; they both know that last was directed at him.

“If I hear further suggestions that I give up my property without receiving something of like value in exchange, then I will sacrifice the man who suggests it, along with Chryses’ bitch daughter to appease the gods. Perhaps you might volunteer, Peliades,” the lord marshal concludes.

“I’m not afraid of speaking up when it’s needed,” Jason growls, “and we all know you can’t afford to sacrifice me.”

“Listen to the arrogance! It is the same you have displayed from the moment you arrived here. I believe it to be high time you face consequence for your heedless words.”

“Consequence,” Jason echoes, calm; Tim shifts closer, knowing that his outward composure is a sign of danger. The men around them shift as well, some of them whispering; more than one man’s fingers twitch toward their sword. “It’s you who should think of consequence.”

“Careful,” Tim cautions in his ear, breath hot across his neck as he comes to step beside him. He has to keep from rubbing at the area with his thumb.

“Is that a threat?” the king of men demands.

“An observation. How much longer do you think these men will last, without me to lead them into battle? How many times have I been the one who turned the tides of defeat to victory, while you remained in the back ranks?”

Now the whispering is louder, angrier; voices of dissent and outrage.

“I am High King!” the older lord roars. “Every man here knelt before me when we came to these shores or swore oaths to the gods to follow my command. Even your beloved Menoitiades whom you shield as if he is your wife.” Tim clenches his fists but carefully doesn’t meet Jason’s eyes; acknowledgement of one another now will only prove the argument. “You are the only one that always considered yourself above such things.”

Jason is furious. Green like the cold sea edges around his vision, and it would be so easy to leap across the three-foot gap and snap the bastard’s neck. He could do it before anyone else might react, and he’s fast enough to get away before anyone retaliates.

But Tim isn’t.

Tim who remains tense, shoulders set and whose fingers make a minute twitching motion against his side, silently beseeching Jason to keep his calm.

It doesn’t work.

“I have nothing to prove to you, or any who swore oaths to you,” Jason snarls through gritted teeth. “The horse-tamers have never threatened my home, have never stolen our stock or torched our fields. I chose to be here, to sail to this wretched city and help your half-wit brother regain a woman who likely doesn’t wish to be reclaimed.”

More murmuring; it’s a sentiment no one has wanted to voice.

“Have a care with your words, boy; not all gods who listen are favorable to you.”

“And what would you know of the gods? I’m closer to their ilk than you ever will be, without the scandal that troubles your bloodline. If anyone should have these men’s fealty, it’s not you. Perhaps you should be the one who bends knee in appeasement.”

The crowd is outright clamoring now, supporters and enemies alike shouting over one another. The older man’s eyes widen in triumph. “You think yourself better than me? Or than the men I command?”

“No, they are my equals. You’re the dog-faced son of a bitch that isn’t fit to clean the boots of the men you profess to lead into battle.”

Exclamations of disbelief.

“That’s enough!” Tim hisses, jabbing him with an elbow.

“Yes, listen to your keeper, Peliades. He seeks to save you from being named a traitor to this army, and suffering punishment for it. Though I think we are beyond the point of playing this off as country bumpkin ignorance to custom. Your war prizes are forfeit; I will take them under tutorship until you come to your senses and offer submission to me.”

Jason’s muscles pull taut in incandescent anger. “You have no right to do that!”

“I have every right, especially since you are so keen to take mine. In fact, I demand the first woman you took as spoil at Ilion—fetch me Briseis’ daughter. She will replace the woman the gods wish me to return.”

“If you touch her, you forgo your victory in this war. I will take my ships and return to my land.”

“Flee, then, if your heart urges you! I have no fear of you—of all the kings the son of Kronos nurtures, you are the one I hate the most. Go with your ships, run with your tail between your legs. But I will have the woman before you go.”

Jason’s hand goes to his sword, but Tim’s hand is on his then.

“Leave it,” he whispers, frantic. “There are greater punishments than death. Let’s regroup and find a solution to this away from prying eyes.”

Jason knows he’s right. The men around them are filled with shock and disapproval, but none of the cowards will support him if he strikes down the king of men.

And so instead of slicing the ignorant prick’s kneecaps out from under him, Jason simply spits at his feet.

“You’re a coward with the face of a dog but the heart of a deer. You’ve never had the courage to arm for battle along with the men you boast to lead because you fear death. You’re faithless, taking the property of those who speak contrary to you, preferring to rule over a kingdom of nobodies. Your words today doom you and your men to disgraceful ends.” He glares at all the men gathered there simply watching. “I won’t fight alongside this army any longer, and without me, you’ll all fall, ground beneath the feet of the man-killing prince. The day will come when you send your toadies to me to beg, and you’ll kneel before me crying for forgiveness, but I’ll give you nothing but laughter as you bleed in the dust before me. You will all die in ignominy for what the son of Atreus does today.”

And with that, he turns on his heel and stalks away.

Tim follows, as do the rest of the men sworn to him.

“I’ll kill him,” Jason fumes under his breath when they are far enough away not to be heard. “I would have if you hadn’t stopped me.”

“I know. And then you would have been struck down, which I couldn’t allow,” Tim soothes. “Be patient. I’ll think of a plan, you know I always do.”

“And in the meantime, that sack of pig shit will take Hippodamea and vent his frustrations toward me on her,” Jason growls.

“If he rapes her, he violates the life of one who is under your gods given protection. His men and the gods will turn on him if he does. After that display, he’s not going to court anymore of their disapproval. She will be safe until you bend knee to him.”

“Which won’t happen.”

“There are more important things than your pride,” Tim reminds him, a bit of reprimand in his tone. “Don’t lower yourself to his level, to the level of men, when you are as a god.”

Jason blinks, and turns to Tim. “That’s it.”

“What?”

“I’ll go to my mother.”

Tim’s face pales. “No!”

“Why not? And it better not be because you think she hates you.”

“She does hate me, but that’s besides the point. I just…have a bad feeling. The silver-footed are like the sea—unmerciful and uncaring who they harm in their storm. That path leads to death, I think.”

“Yes. His.”

Tim is silent and continues to look worried.

“I don’t need your permission to do this,” Jason tells him, a little sour that he doesn’t have his support on this matter.

Something like hurt flickers across his face, but then Tim’s expression goes carefully blank. “I would never presume to tell you what to do.”

“That’s not what everyone on this gods forsaken beach thinks!”

“Since when have you ever cared what people think?”

“You can’t stop me doing this,” Jason snaps.

Tim looks sad now. “I know.”

He turns to leave.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to prepare Hippodamea for what’s to come. Somehow I doubt you will be able to feign sympathy long enough to shoulder that burden,” he replies coldly, and stalks away.

Jason watches him go, his righteous anger continuing to simmer, until it occurs to him that Tim is actually quite angry with him. Some of the bite goes out of his rage, and worry creeps through his body.

“No, wait,” he starts, hurrying after him. “Don’t go—”

“—Tim!”

Jason sits upright in bed, arm outstretched as if to make a grab for a hand or arm, only to grasp air.

A maelstrom of different emotions cloud his mind, blocking his awareness of the room around him for several long seconds while he fights for his bearings. Anger and hurt and guilt and fear, all tied up with longing, playing on repeat in his head.

He has the strangest compulsion to make amends for something and he doesn’t remember what.

“Fuck,” he murmurs, pulling his hand back close to his body, elbow to chest, hand pressing against his shoulder. The skin radiates heat through the cotton of his t-shirt, warmer than his normal body temperature; probably from the wound.

He is alone, surrounded by pillows and a comforter that should smell like Tim but don’t (because Alfred washed them, so they’re new), in a room that feels somehow too big (which it shouldn’t, it’s the same size as the other rooms, as his room that he never goes into if he can help it. It’s bigger than the holding cell was).

A glance at the digital clock reads two in the morning. Prime patrol time, and more importantly, four hours since he put his head down. He’s pretty sure that’s the most sleep he’s had in a week, even if it was cut short by another of those maddening dream sequences that vanish from his memory in direct relation to how awake he becomes.

Where’s Tim?

He swings his feet over the edge of the bed, ready to go looking for him in the house, before remembering what he said before he fell asleep.

Don’t freak out.

Right. No problem. Tim’s just off somewhere having a human moment, which is just as well. He probably needs a break from Jason. Jason knows he needs a break from Tim—from everyone really. He can’t remember the last time he was in someone’s constant presence.

This is a good thing, he tells himself as he glances around the room, absently picking at the dry skin on the side of his thumb. He didn’t really look around when he first walked in. His brain was still trying to process the concept of Tim being the one to suggest his room as being the best place for Jason to relax.

And the surprise that he was actually right.

Tim is everywhere in these walls—video game posters and obscure pop culture refences—and furniture. There are candid photographs of him and his friends—Jason scowls at one of him and the Super Clone standing way too close together—and half-finished projects of wire and circuit. Clothes and books are strewn across the floor and—

“Christ, kid, you’re a goddamned slob.”

He never really took note of that quirk of Tim’s before, probably because they never really hung out. His knowledge of the kid’s lifestyle was limited to his own notions of what spoiled rich boys were like, and the general observation that his replacement ran on coffee and energy drinks.

His thumb is bleeding now from his continued picking, and he wipes it angrily on his pants, standing up. He needs a distraction. Otherwise, he’s going to go looking for Tim, or blow up his phone with calls until he picks up. He needs to prove to himself that he still has some control—test how long he can manage on his own, or at least test how long it takes between Tim leaving him alone and the anxious thoughts to set in.

He’s coming back. He wanted me to be here, or he wouldn’t have suggested it.

Jason just has to be patient.

Which…yeah, that was an issue even before this fixation crap.

“Screw this, I’m not just sitting here,” he grumbles, and starts wandering around the room, sorting clothes and tools and whatever other detritus has gathered on the floor. Cleaning is both mindless and immersive, something to do with his hands instead of scratch bloody welts into his skin.

And yet, he still drops everything when his phone vibrates.

“Tim?” he asks in the same breath that he unlocks the phone.

“Sorry.” Barbara actually sounds apologetic. “Just me.”

Disappointment hits him like a punch to the face. “No, yeah, it’s fine.”

“How are you holding up?”

Of course she knows what’s going on, too.

“Spectacular,” he says dryly, running a hand through his hair. “Can we maybe can the sympathy? I’m getting enough of that over here as it is. And you never call just to check in.”

There’s a beat, and then Barbara speaks again, still in her own voice, but more businesslike. “I may have found something.”

He likes that about her. She doesn’t get upset when called out on something, nor does she spend time on bullshit.

How the hell she dated Dick so long will forever be a mystery.

“What?” he asks, studying a strip of picture booth photos of Steph and Tim; the typical assortment of funny faces, pressed close together. Jason frowns, tugging absently at his hair.

“I’m not sure it’s anything, yet,” Barbara cautions, “but it’s almost certainly related to your situation.”

“And how’s that?”

“Because it involves Carrie Cutter.”

Jason straightens up. “What?”

“As soon as you and Tim established that Cupid was involved—both Cupids, I guess—I set up a search algorithm to track her whereabouts for the past month or so.” Of course she’s been monitoring everything from her little command center; this goddamn family and their surveillance… “It’s a bit too neat, someone with her modus operandi just bumping into the real Cupid.”

“And we don’t do coincidence.”

“Exactly.”

“So, she had to be sent there by someone or something. Specifically, to steal from Eros.”

“Yeah. Still working on who, though,” Barbara agrees. “That’s not the most interesting part, though.”

Jason’s scalp is beginning to burn from the distracted tugging, but he doesn’t stop. The pain is punishing, keeps him focussed on Barbara’s voice, and not the urge to hang up on her to call Tim. “Lay it on me.”

“I’ve got newspaper reports from the village of Delphi in Greece with a woman of her description killed a blind twelve-year-old two weeks ago. Sliced her throat with one of her arrowheads and walked away, took out anyone that tried to stop her.”

“Fuck.” Jason almost bites his tongue.

Carrie Cutter’s always been a murderer, but from what he knows of her from Roy, she never hurt a kid. His fingers itch with the need to punch something; he yanks his fingers out of his hair, several strands coming away with it, and slams his fist down on Tim’s desk. It creaks at the force.

“You okay?”

“Better than she’s going to be,” he replies tightly. “What else?”

“You heard me say Delphi, right?”

There’s a pause, like she’s letting him process, which he’s glad for; he did miss that the first time. Jason thinks the news over again, remembering bits and pieces memorized from National Geographic when he was a kid.

“Delphi,” he repeats. “Like the Oracle of Delphi Delphi?”

“Exactly.”

His back goes even more rigid. “Isn’t it common in a lot of myths that people who can see the future tend to be blind?”

“Good memory.”

“So we’re thinking the kid was a seer.”

“I’m thinking the kid was the actual Oracle of Delphi.”

Jason whistles. “But there hasn’t been one of those in hundreds of years, right?”

“Not since Theodosius I closed the temple when the Pythia gave him some bad news. Five years later, he was dead, and the Visigoths had captured Rome, and after that it wasn’t safe to be an oracle. But secret societies have been started over less.”

“Still, how would someone like Carrie Cutter know or even be interested in looking up some secret oracle? Even for Queen, she’s small-time.”

“Still working on that part.”

“And if she did talk to the oracle beforehand, what did the kid tell her that made her kill her?”

“Unfortunately, there was no tech anywhere around to pick up on that. Not even tourists taking cellphone videos.”

“Fuck.”

“But lucky for us, we have someone that can sort of see ghosts.”

Jason’s eyes widen. “Duke.”

“Exactly,” Barbara says, and sounds smug, like she’s just managed a checkmate against fate or circumstance or something. “As soon as he’s done with Dick, I’m sending him on quick trip to Greece. He’ll get a kick out of the plane, I think.”

Jason winces.

It won’t be easy for the newest member of the family to watch a kid being murdered, all for Jason. Worse is the fact he’s a hundred percent sure Duke’s seen worse.

Instead of voicing that thought, however, he says, “Keep me updated.”

“Will do.”

There’s a heavy silence.

“Do you want me to stay on the line?” Barbara asks after a moment. “Until Tim gets back.”

Jason’s first instinct is a snappish retort, a denial that he needs her pity.

But his hand has found its way back into his hair, tearing at the strands as he anxiously waits for the younger man to return and for all he knows, it could be anywhere from ten minutes to ten hours before he sees him again.

He shivers at the thought.

That…would be bad.

And so he clears his throat and tells Barbara in a gruff voice, “Yeah. Okay."

⁂⁂⁂

Next Chapter

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secretshinigami · 5 years

Text

Masterlist of B’s Bitchin Prompts

A compiled list of everyone’s prompts from this round of our exchange – thank you for letting us post them, and we hope you guys enjoy them! If you use a prompt, please let us know and we’ll reblog your piece!

Prompts are organized by their submitter, so feel free to ctrl+f to find character-specific prompts.

fandom-fae

Misa surrounded by lots of flowers, with Rem floating in the background.

Light, happy, wearing goth/emo clothes & he’s holding an apple.

Female!L and female!Light on a date in an ice café

Misa in pastel goth fashion, reading a book.

Shien from Light Up The New World meeting Mello (from his time at the mafia) and Misa (from before L died)

Near and Misa eating ice cream together

Misa painting Mello’s nails

Linda painting Misa

Mello in pastel clothes, being in a café with Misa

Beyond crying with A’s dead body in the background

Misa standing on the edge of the building she jusmped off, viewed through the shinigami eyes.

Light waking up in his teenage bedroom after he died, as a seventeen-year-old a day before he would’ve found the death note, and what he’d do

Mello finds the death note instead of Light, and if he’d tell Matt about it

Beyond and Misa spending a day together (going shopping, playing pranks on ppl, committing murder, a date, etc. it’s your choice!)

(pre-canon) Misa going on vacation with her family to Winchester, and befriending the Wammy’s kids, Maki and her father are also there

(pre-canon) Mello adopting a stray cat and naming her L, he absolutely adores her. one day she dies, how he would react

Naomi meets L, she thinks he’s Beyond Birthday. how does he convince her otherwise?

Light being suicidal, and either Misa or L stop him from killing himself, and the conversation that ensues

Linda lives in LA, and gets contacted by Near, years after the Kira case

Misa performing a ritual to talk to ghosts after Light died. She actually manages to contact a ghost, L’s ghost

Beyond contacting Misa because someone told him she had a god of death at her command, and he wants to bring someone back (A, or L, your decision), Rem (compassionately) explaining that it doesn’t work that way, and Misa comforting Beyond (it’s optional whether or not they end up friends)

gevnni

Light and Mikami having a lightsaber fight

Rester is Takada's bodyguard

Gevanni putting together a ship in a bottle

the FBI asks B for help in a case + Naomi and Raye look on slightly horrified at his antics

Rester is Takada's bodyguard

Gevanni putting together a ship in a bottle while on a case

nocturneproductions

Fem!Light

MatsuLight kissing

Beyond birthday being creepy

Mob!au, ideally focused on Light

Light and Matsuda on a first date

Ryuk stays with Light during the Yotsuba arc

hazblogs

A in a crop top with the queer flag(s) of your choice

Mello and sun imagery

Pokémon (Go or not) AU with the Wammy gang (including possible OCs of yours)

band AU with Light, Misa, Ryuk and L

Light with Hanahaki disease (you can pick the ship you want, make it AU or not)

Naomi and BB interacting (during the LABB case or in an AU)

L/Light being soulmates (canon or AU)

how Matt started smoking (I am comfortable with heavy drug themes)

ikathemadhatter

Light and L as goth idols

Naomi & B as Pokemon trainers

L taking care of a cat

Lucifer!Light

Light, L and Misa dressed up for Halloween

LawLight Little Mermaid AU where Light is a mermaid

LawLight Mad Max AU

What chain of events brought Wammy to adopt L?

During Yotsuba Arc, Misa forces Light on a night date at the karaoke and L has to follow them because he and Light are still chained together. What happens after few drinks and some songs?

jam-knife

Naomi and B rocking some tuxedos!

Mello and Matt just laying around at Wammy's. Just a nice art is more than enough, but if you feel like making it into a funny one-panel comic then that would be awesome :D

Misa and B (and any other character you feel like including) killing it at Met Gala -literally or figuratively or both is up to you xD

An LxLight slowburn with Yotsuba!Light obsessing over whether he is in fact Kira or not.

The Tales of That One Time Mello Allegedly Beat Matt's Ass at Mario Kart.

A first-person narration of Misa after finding out Light died, and how she planned her suicide (but if it's a triggering subject for you I totally get it! No probs at all)

misas-biggest-fan

misa at one of her concerts! super hardcore and goth and metal

Light and L being soft and loving to each other!!

misa and beyond but LIFE SWAP AU where b is the tormented rockstar second kira and misa is the bitter, murderous wammy's kid!

beyond meets naomi before starting his LABB plan and his love for her convinces him not to go through w it <3333 you can make it romantic if you want by im more a platonic ship sort of dude!

kira!L goes up against detective!Light

light being tailed by L’s ghost

niatsuki

Near and Light kissing

Mikami and Light in the rain sharing an umbrella

Mello travelling

Domestic Mikalight

Matsuda confronting Near on the theory he brings up at the end of the manga

Nate and Light having an obtuse argument, but with romantic undertones

ichigosouma

L wearing Gucci

Watari on his day off

Anyone as a pokemon trainer

Misa and Beyond going shopping

Mikami and Kiyomi hanging out on their day off

Ryuk and Rem playing the wii together

translightyagami

L in a sweater that says "My Gender is Shut the Fuck Up"

Light with a bloody nose and starry eyes

L with his hair in a loose ponytail, reading a Nancy Drew book

The books L read as a child, bonus points if you do Nancy Drew and not Sherlock

3 drinks Light has had with men he's in love with (your choice on who the men are)

L putting Light into a coat and leaving an object in his pocket that Light finds later, with Light speculating what the object means.

izaori

Backup in a magical girl outfit (whether it's from akazukin chacha or somewhere else, it doesn't matter)

Mello playing a sport like soccer or baseball, in a cool sports uniform perhaps

Sayu and Light studying together!!

Backup back in his Wammy days before doing the LABB, interacting with other students or working on case files

Light and Yuri's date at the amusement park since she still wanted to go so badly after the bus-jacking incident.

L and Rem have a chat shortly before L's death, by themselves. L likely knows he'll be dying soon, and Rem has the same feeling.

pensulliwen

Misa making Valentine’s Day chocolate, perhaps while daydreaming about a fantastically unlikely result of giving them to Light.

Meme redraws featuring Misa, Light, and L. Just go crazy. Any ridiculous meme image, shove these dorks in there instead.

A family portrait of Misa when she was younger, imagining her parents and sister or with their faces obscured.

Misa and Mogi on a shopping “date” in which the unlikely pair manage to work together surprisingly well.

Light considers eliminating Misa from the equation many times, but there’s always something that stops him. Explore how he views her and the dissonance between how he views her versus how he views himself, as well as the reasoning for keeping her around longer than intended.

An older Sayu reflecting on how her relationship with her brother has changed, and maybe trying to rekindle the closeness she felt when they were younger.

stanmisa

Misa in fashionable clothes or Misa in Scene/emo fashion

L x Light hate-relationship

Misa, Light, and L (and any other characters you prefer) as fantasy classes/races, like d&d

L/Light hate pining/complicated emotions between these emotionally stunted men

Misa getting together with Rem instead of Light

Sayu and Misa being friends

yagami-raito-kun

Light and Near interacting in any form

College professor AU (any characters)

Art inspired by any of my fics or drabbles is always welcome!

Light in prison always gets a hell yeah

Light and Sayu at the beach being siblings and having fun

Canon divergence: Mello kidnaps Light instead of Sayu

sculs-cf-scnder

Misa Amane giving Beyond Birthday a very Misa makeover

Demegawa at a spa, getting pampered after a hard day at work

Team Kira (Mikami, Light, Misa, Takada, Higuchi is optional) as a visual kei band.

Death Note is actually a TV drama; Misa and Light are actors and Misa is starting to think that Light hates her just like his character even though they are dating

An insight on the aftermath of Aizawa quitting, how did his family react, doubts about his marriage and his future

Sachiko and Sayu take the day off to have a girls' night.

eyeshiny

Beyond chilling with some tigers in the jungle (if you enjoy drawing animals)

70s fashion Mello+Matt (romantic or no)

stone faced 1920s family-style portrait of L + the Wammy boys (A+B included or removed, however youd like)

Beyond and A start a ghosthunting business, B is essentially a fake psychic but A can actually see ghosts

Pre-orphanage backstory for any of the Wammy boys (not necessarily tragic! think series of unfortunate events moreso than a true crime documentary)

What if death note was written like a seinfeld episode?

Anonymous

Sidoh drinking hot chocolate & being happy

B in a bathrobe with a strawberry pattern

Naomi and Halle on a date

Awkward post-Kira case dinner at Gevanni's house that includes all four living members of the SPK

Mello interviews B, but B mostly just trolls him and doesn't give clear answers to anything he asks

L uses astrology to try and prove that Light is Kira

Your interpretation of A with B sharing a nice moment at Wammy’s house

A few characters of your choice aged-up (what do you think they’d have looked like in the show if they had grown older?)

Matt and Mello (either at wammy’s house or after— doesn’t have to be super shippy if you don’t want)

Near with a big fluffy dog— maybe a therapy/comfort dog

Either L or Naomi visiting Beyond in prison

Gevanni, Rester, or other SPK members reflecting on Near. Maybe including an attempt at trying and failing to treat him like a child

A and Beyond are alive for the Kira case au

Past light meeting future light

90s fashion Beyond

Creepy contortionist L

the Death Note cast recreating a famous painting1. Mello and Beyond bonding (but not as a ship)

Light in any of the circles of Hell

the main Death Note cast set in a 'Lord of the Flies' situation

Naomi, B and L shenanigans

Halle, Wedy and Naomi as Charlie's angels1. Naomi visiting B in jail

Raye meeting B

D&D AU

Misa and Rem painting each other's nails black.

Matt and Mello cuddling and watching the rain.

L dressed as Sherlock Holmes.

oleswap AU between L and Light.

Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde AU with Light as Jekyll (Kira being his hidden personality aka Hyde) and L as Gabriel Utterson.

A story of how Ryuuk summarizes his adventure with the human world in a poem, really dark poem, which he later declaims to the Shinigami King and the unnamed Shinigami.

#Death Note #prompt list #B's Bitchin Borthday 2k19

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