#oof! I know it’s weird to say but I actually spent MORE time on the sketch than the actual pic
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Make Use Of Me (chapter 1, preview)
Dec. 7 EDIT: ONCE MORE, WITH BRAVERY THIS TIME. No more chickening out. You can read this thing FOR REAL now. Sorry for being weird, and now....sorry if this wasn't worth it. XD
O-OK...here goes....
First thing's first: I am not expecting a lotta people to read this. I'm not asking people to read this. At this point, I'm making this mostly as a passion project, and if anyone enjoys it, it'll be a really cool bonus. My writing style isn't gonna be for everyone, and the characters I write aren't the most....popular characters in the CRK X Reader community, and I imagine this isn't really something a lotta fans'll be demanding more of.
This is LONG. This one chapter is 56 pages long. I am a VERY wordy writer,
So......why'm I posting this preview? Well....partially as an interest gauge for people who WOULD wanna read it, but...mostly as a motivator. As something to remind myself of whenever I get lazy. After all....I can't quit after I made the first chapter public, right? By doing that, I put myself out there...And, hey, I even tagged it, so, if by the off chance, someone did read it, I'm basically promising them more eventually.....
But, again, I'm not forcing anyone to read this.
Not only is it long, but.....This first chapter is probably my least-favorite thing I've ever written. By posting this chapter by itself, I'm testing to see if it does its job of making people wanna read the rest, cuz....right now, I'm not so sure how well it succeeds at that.....
This is the boring part of the story. It's a bunch of setup, and me jumping through hoop after hoop after hoop to just get everything started. I know setup is important and all, but....I'm already a very wordy writer, so....oof....There is some interesting stuff that happens, but it takes a while to get there.
I-I....kinda hate it, actually. The only reason I didn't scrap it is that I didn't realize I hated it until I was about halfway through it and the "good part" hadn't started yet. And I still spent a month writing the thing, so....I finished it.
I'm tagging this...as an experiment. If you wanna read this, go ahead. W-well, read my tags first, THEN go ahead. XD
All I can really say in this chapter's defense is that....I do try my best to salvage it. It's just setup, but I TRIED to make it interesting. And everything that seems like it didn't go anywhere, will later. This isn't the whole story, it's just the beginning of what's gonna be a BIG story. Anything that seems weird in this chapter, gets explored in the other chapters. This does set up a bunch of stuff that becomes important later (The friend character shows up later, the Colosseum becomes relevant later). This chapter is boring, but I tried not to make any of it pointless.
For the future: I'm aiming for five chapters. Chapters 2 and 3 will be a series of smaller vignettes that take place over the course of a few years, chapter 4 will be the climax, and chapter 5 will be something of an epilogue. After that, there will be two endings to choose from (which will make sense when we get there).
This probably won't be my favorite thing I've ever written, but it will be the most ambitious thing I've ever, and probably will ever, write. I haven't written something like this before, and it's all to flesh out this story and make it believable.
Right now, I.....I want to finish this. I'll probably still be writing this in February at the rate I'm going, but...at this point, I've put too much into it to give up on it. However, I'm STILL not completely ruling out the idea of my motivation dying before then. It COULD happen. So, what I'm planning to do is...setting a short-term goal of finishing chapter 3. After I do that, I'll post the first three chapters on AO3 together, and work on the rest. That way, even if I don't finish it, I'll at least have it over half done, and chapter 3 will end on a somewhat high note.
So, yyyyeah....Not a lotta people will read this preview. Overly wordy writing style + boring setup part of story + 56 pages long + assumed lack of interest for X Readers of this character (At least, I haven't SEEN many simps for her, m-maybe I'm wrong, I might be, I-I haven't checked any tags cuz I've been nervous, b-but it doesn't make my writing any better. In that case, this is my first time writing her so I'm trying super hard to do her justice >//////<)
I-if you wanna read this, and see if this first chapter does a good job of making you wanna read the better chapters, then...Go ahead.....
Some notes:
-This is still not the final draft. It's finalized enough for me to share, but I'm still not considering it finished. Even tho I'm working on chapter 3 right now, I STILL go back and edit this, even very recently. So, chances are, even if the story is finalized, small details and sentences are still subject to change. I know for a fact that there are still SOME placeholder bits in here that will change after I get some stuff cleared up. Recently, I even considered chopping off an entire section to make it shorter. I decided not to, but hey, it could still happen. I don't wanna waste anyone's time. The first chapter of a story, even if it's boring, is still very important, and I wanna make sure it's the best version of itself.
(A-and yes, this means that I've finished chapter 2 as well. The reason I'm not sharing it is that, unlike chapter 1, it was finished VERY recently, so I might still need to give myself time to edit it. From what I have, tho, I do like it a LOT more than chapter 1. There are some parts of chapter 2 that I'm legit proud of.)
-Even tho this first chapter is completely clean, I-I should mention that....this fic is for adults. The full version, at least. Chapters 3 and 4 are gonna contain some light N/S/F/W moments (the "fade to black" variety, so nothing explicit) and there'll be other slightly racey comments here and there. Just a heads-up. I'm gonna be uncomfy with minors reading this.
Th-that's all? I-I think that's all.......O-OK, so......h-here goes.....
E-enjoy....
#fics by lauri#fanfic preview#WARNING: UNFINISHED#THIS IS JUST THE FIRST CHAPTER#......AND ITS STILL A LONG READ#cookie run x reader#crk x reader#golden cheese cookie x reader#gender neutral reader#also contains a gender neutral 'friend' character you can do what you want with#basically i got inspired by that part in her bio that mentions how...#....shes always looking to add more loyal subjects#and it made me imagine the story of an outsider who gradually integrates into the kingdom and earns her approval#so its an underdog story basically#and there a LOT that the reader gets put through#reader is shy and socially awkward but can also be a bit more sarcastic than the other reader characters ive written#im aiming for a BIT more comedy than usual since its my first crk fic that doesnt take place in the humorless dark cacao kingdom XD#but yeah reader is a ball of anxiety#they get panic attacks later on#pre canon#VERY VERY VERY pre canon#takes place DECADES before canon#before um....the lost city became lost#its not virtual#no errors no avatars#just a technologically advanced city#power imbalance and god complex stuff all over the place cuz fghdhgfhdhfgh im weak for that part of her#also contains some themes of verbal abuse (from nameless characters toward reader)#and like i said it has some adult moments later on#contains a lot of time skips
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FSR Rambles 10 fingers in the aaaaa-
I don't let up on the fucking Vidow. The entire fandom has to just cope with the fact I'm a disastrous weirdo stinking up their perfect pure fandom, they cry themselves to sleep at the cryptid that stalks at the edges their fandom.
Weep you disgusting filthy bastards.
I bet you salivate at the idea of Vio's breast milk in your slutty coffee.
Lol I guess he fell asleep reading.
Shadow makes a very sinister face considering the goofy ass thing he decides to do with the sleeping Vio.
Hah. Vio screaming his lungs out got a kick out of me while drawing.
Shadow forgot Hylian's sleep for a reason.
He's just waiting for Vio to call him a moron, which we know again is because of Vaati and Gannon abusing this poor man.
Shadow's utterly shocked Vio doesn't have a single thing to berate him over hah.
Vio's so tired he just wants to sleep.
Shadow's feeling nervous to actually like, get cozy with Vio in this context.
Despite his seeming confidence the dude is insecure.
He is HESITANT to trust Vio to some degree, he's having second thoughts about his actions.
Vio didn't even SAY anything about the kiss lmfao. I'd be worried too.
This page is so sad to me.
Vio's feeling some regret while Shadow gets comfortable next to him.
HAHAHAHA.
Transition from being next to someone to being completely alone agh-
Shadow Link is in MISSERY-
Oof. Shit hurts.
The sword blast compiled with his emotional pain is just too much for this dude to handle rn.
Reflecting on his time with his "friend"
Guess that kiss in the library wasn't the last one...Vio seems reluctant to keep going back for more, pushing shadow off. We can assume why he shouldn't be doing that oops.
Shadow's not satisfied with that though and keeps giving our man kisses. Vio's really shitty attempts to bat him away aren't working.
It's safe to say: Vio lost the plot at some point.
It's obvious they're drunk as fuck, but the exact timing of this scene is up for interpretation as far as I'm concerned.
I do find it funny Shadow whines Vio is "So mean to him" just cause he won't let him shower him with kisses lmfao. Like Shadow he's about to do smth to you that's way meaner let's be real-
Shadow Link brings up the all to important LORE of the golden goddesses.
Okay but everything about this becomes ironic later lmfao I will not say how.
Cause the Triforce is like, non existent in FS I can do whatever the hell I want sooo I'mma cook. I like where I took it a lot.
Shadow's desires to touch the Triforce are uh...VERY EXPLAINED LATER to say the least.
Art wise in this page: Oh it was so fun.
1st panel: Shadow continuing to kiss Vio's cheeks as he talks. It's sweet in it's own weird way that he clearly cares about Vio a lot
2nd panel: Obviously comparing Vio with a goddess and the Triforce shows how much Shadow values this man in his life, cupping his cheeks while doing so.
3rd panel: They both just look cute. XD
4rth panel: Vio's visibly hesitant to return the kiss that time. and in the last panel we don't see his face, but rather get Shadow hugging him deeply.
Vio's still grappling with his actions are gonna catch up to both of them pretty soon.
Vio's utter heartlessness in the words he spoke to Shadow in the Fire temple must have HURT.
Shadow knows that he bold faced lied to everyone in that room.
Also to note: They CLEARLY spent some TIME together, as there's the scene of Vio and Shadow laughing together on some grass somewhere...
Shadow KNOWS Vio at least a little and he can't comprehend why he acted the way he did.
The last panel was so much fun I love how it turned out.
Okay but like: THIS LTIERALLY ALWAYS BOTHERED ME.
The idea Shadow betrayed Vaati being a fault of SHADOW'S character is such bullshit which just adds to the "Vio pulled this out of his ass" nature of his speech.
In every way: SHADOW BETRAYING VAATI IS A GOOD THING.
In WHAT WORLD is him turning his back on the EVIL GUY a bad thing???
His motives were 100% selfish but HOLY BALLS HE WAS WILLING TO GO NUCULAR ON GANON AND VATTI AND SAVE ZELDA FOR SOME VIUSSY. THAT'S DEDICATION.
Also, literally everyone's motivations for everything they do is selfish in nature, so the idea Shadow's the dick here is just, hysterical.
Vio was 100% projecting his own insecurities onto Shadow not trusting and being apart of his own team cause Vio's awful, cause let's be real: their situations are just NOT COMPARABLE.
Shadow's misstep no matter how you look at it, was trusting VIO. NOT betraying Vaati. HIS LITERAL POSITIVE CHARACTER ARC WAS STILL BETRAYING VAATI BY SHATTERING THE DARK MIRROR.
...SO WTF IS VIO'S SPEECH ABOUT EXACTLY??? IT LITERALLY MAKES NO SENSE PROBEBLY BECAUSE HE'S LYING HIS ASS OFF AND PROJECTING LMFAO.
Because his point wasn't "Find a team you CAN and DO trust and work with them." it was "You betrayed Vaati and you suck for that."
IT WAS PURE PROJECTION.
Idk if this is a translation oopsie or what. It was never brought UP so idk if it was even intentional or a genuine attempt at a moral going to shit and getting botched. X'DDDD (If it was intentional, that's funny but it was never expanded upon in any meaningful way so...IDK)
It gives weird as fuck mixed messages about what Shadow was MEANT to do here and what he ACTUALLY did wrong from Vio's chastising. Cause the reason Vio gives for his downfall is REALLY BULLSHIT. (In FSR, Intentionally so.)
Because
"Your downfall was that you were selfish and still wanted to rule the world and were willing to use used people like me and Zelda to do it, you just repeated the mistakes of Vaati" or smth would even be more accurate.
STILL HYPOCRITCAL ON VIO'S END CAUSE HE USED SHADOW BUT WOULD MAKE MORE FUCKING SENSE.
Giving massive rebound AU vibes here lmfao.
Audience is intentionally left in the dark about wtf Vio and Green were talking about...For no reason I'm sure. Authors don't think that hard about stuff-
Also left out on why they're sharing a bed. Bet that will NEVER get touched on. In ANY meaningful way.
The point of this scene is pretty obvious: Vio IS getting along with his team now. Which mega hurts Shadow to see ouch.
It's the equivalent of that Squidward meme of him in his house while Spongebob and Patrick run outside-
Green essentially has taken his place. Pain. We all know nothing but PAIN.
Shadow can't bare to watch Vio thrive without him cause he's selfish as fuck. X'D Just hurts too much. He wanted Vio to fill the gaps in his life and it just DIDN'T happen.
Haha you read the manga you recognize this. I don't gotta elaborate much.
I always just, am in love with Shadow turning into VIO of all people during this part in the story because, holy BALLS I can't even really describe the kind of itch that scratches in my brain but I will try.
So in FS, we KNOW Shadow can shapeshift into ANY of the Links, but he chose Vio. Dude has been Green/Link before so...WHY NOT GREEN?
Uh simple: Bro adores Vio and looks up to him, that's the reasoning I came to anyway, as explained in these pages.
This is why in FSR in the library Shadow Link specifically describes Vio as "his hero". Vio's the one out of the four he looks up to most, because after reflecting Vio is the one that did the most "Heroic" things in his eyes.
He realized the betrayal wasn't out of malice or to hurt him, but to save Zelda.
The reasons Vio gives in the library for why he's utterly awful as a person are the same things that made Shadow respect his ass for what he put himself through lmfao.
This is also why in FSR dude isn't MAD at Vio for it anymore. He just wants to repair what they DID have there between them because bro adores Vio.
So if yall didn't know Shadow uses the mirror to see Vio.
Like, you can see him in the shattered mirror lmfao.
At least I THINK it's meant to be Vio. When I first read the manga I thought it was Shadow Link. XDDDD But now I'm fairly certain it is Vio. If we ever get a full color manga I'd love to know who it's actually meant to be.
Shadow's sad he won't know if Zelda's okay. Which is sad. And wishes he could see Vio, which is why the mirror SHOWS Vio. Lol.
Sad pathetic Vaati being hilarious aside, Vio being so distraught he drops his sword is kinda funny. And here's the retcon of "Vaati didn't die actually.
I already went on the rant in the actual thing that YES Shadow's death still meant smth despite Vaati living, because they wouldn't be able to beat Gannon without the gems Vaati gave up from this, so I won't repeat myself here.
Blue's "HOLD UR HORSES BITCH" is so funny to me because like, he HAS no emotional attachment to Shadow and the last they saw of HIM was him ya know, trying to kills their friend lmfao.
Vio pulling a very dying Shadow into his arms, because we deserved that. Green picks up Vio's sword cause he's cool like that.
Vio is OBVIOUSLY trying very hard to keep it together here, kept the dialogue MOSTLY the same from the OG because the dialogue wasn't the issue to me it was the freaking SHOT LAYOUTS AND THE ART. The art was well drawn but the actual like, things happening were kinda silly imo.
I particularly like the return of the "Shadow pets Vio's face/hair" motif.
It pops up in page 40
and page 77
And in terms of flashbacks in 169 Yes haha funny number He strokes Vio's cheek before going in for the kiss.
And many others but I'll avoid too many cause of image limits.
Shadow usually does this when Vio's upset which is funny. We know Shadow does stuff to others he wishes people did for him so maybe Shadow just wants his cheek stroked and to be told nice things lmfao.
Another thing: I mentioned it before but I don't really like when people make Vio cry too easily. Just not for me.
But Shadow dying makes sense for him to cry. Especially in FSR where we saw WAAAAY MORE of their relationship and how involved Vio really was with Shadow.
Vio, reluctantly did really like Shadow Link and is heart broken he is dead.
*I SUPER wanna show/talk about the "After they think they killed him in the fire temple" but there's a reason I did not show wtf Green and Vio were talking about when Shadow saw them in the dark mirror hehehehe. Vio's perspective on RIGHT after they blasted him with the sword is smth you can just speculate on for now.
He is obviously DISTRAUGHT Shadow is dying now.
So, its' implied Shadow saw some of the things Link was up to before he made himself known. So in my silly FSR comic he could see through Link's Shadow at what he was doing.
Art details:
Red crying at somebody dying just made sense to me it was actually WEIRD to me he didn't cry Shadow died. Not because he's emotionally attached, but dude's just an emotional person he cried at less hah.
Green STEPS UP and says his lines from the manga
I said in the OG post of the comic my thoughts on these particular panels but like
Green having just a TIIIIINY bit more agency in him holding Shadow's hand, a VERY simple gesture makes all the difference to me in this scene.
Shadow reasonably asks what we were ALL thinking: WHAT ABOUT ZELDA?!
Which OUCH, he didn't feel like he did enough-
To which Green comforts him they WILL save her.
I may ship Vidow to hell and back but Shadow's caring for Zelda and her affect on him is not ignored in this comic lmfao.
It's actually knowing Zelda's in safe hands that makes him comfortable enough to truly pass.
He knows Vio will be okay as he has his team but Zelda is someone he couldn't be sure about.
So panel 1
I just wanted to add the true level of "Yeah he dead".
Despite his hand passing through Shadow Link, Vio still tries to reach out to him. Which hehe reflects a scene from the very start of this comic huh?
He has unfinished business around Shadow.
He never got to truly say he was sorry.
If you've noticed, Vio STILL hasn't apologized yet.
Okay thumbnailing this scene genuinely gave me the big sad lmfao.
He missed him by a hair, Shadow's gone and Vio couldn't say all the things that were on his mind.
And since you totally asked:
Page 12 is put into a new perspective huh?
He reached him this time...
Green continues to be the goodest of good boys comforting his team mate.
There's an underlying sense of Green knowing more about Vio and Shadow's relationship than the other two...Which makes sense considering Green's the one Vio went to for comfort over the situation.
So some of the dialogue around Shadow's "good boy" status was changed because I just, straight disagree with some of the wording in the manga...
He did AWFUL things but he wasn't exactly a 100% bad person. Ironically, given a chance he could have been a great person. (The opposite of what he tried to do to Vio.)
His nature of being Link's Shadow, the HERO's shadow being on full display with his final moments (Or, what COULD have been his final moments...)
Blue's shocked Shadow would do anything to help them, reasonably so. His experiences with Shadow have been:
He tried to seduce their team mate to the dark side, almost KILLED said team mate, put them through hell and back and generally was awful to them.
Red sympathizes with BLUE (At least somewhat) so I imagine he's a lot more forgiving from this angle to Shadow. XD
Green's feelings about Shadow are a bit more OPEN to interpretation here but he did make an effort for the man to die without regrets. Later in FSR he seems to have a positive outlook on Shadow so whatever Vio told him might have made him more comfortable with him in these moments and the future.
I'mma cut it off here, which sucks because this transition is PERFECT into the next scene but I don't wanna hit image limits halfway through a rant.
Green continues to be a chad. What's new.
Him being in front of his team protectively is just...Yum. I love protective Green. XD
GANNON APEARS. Big piggy boy. I had no idea I could draw pig before drawing this and I'm happy with how he turned out.
His rant in the OG manga of speaking how Vaati and Shadow Link failed him leads directly into the next scene which was, delicious. But we'll pick this up later.
I'm sure you've noticed: As a time saving technique I only use shading when it SUPER matters in FSR. It helps save time and makes them have huge impacts. XD
The intense dark shading on Ganon makes him look threatening as HELL compared to what he'd look like without it.
For reference: This is what he'd look like without it.
He looks silly. XD
His color palette was based on the game btw. Because, what else did I have to go on?
The intense shading also hides that he looks kinda out of place color wise haha.
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A Serbian Film (2010, horror/crime/mystery)
I spent 1 hour and 44 minutes of my life watching this film… While I am deeply disturbed and probably will be for quite some time, I must say that A Serbian Film is an extremely well done piece of work. It took a bit of time before I was able to find somewhere to watch the film with english subtitles, but once I did, boi…
Ok, so getting right into it, I was slightly annoyed that there’s no translated version of this film but I’m not gonna pretend I don’t get why that is. One version of this movie is most definitely enough, so while I was a bit frustrated that I had to read subtitles the entirety of the movie, I was actually pretty impressed with what I watched despite how deeply it got under my skin. Labeled as a crime/mystery horror film, A Serbian Film was shockingly well shot and the acting was actually really impressive given the content being shot. With the content being centered around the loss of innocence and corruption and featuring children in some very heavy and upsetting ways, I have to applaud the acting done here.
With its story centered around a serbian porn star and the weird, creepy new “artistic” movie he’s supposed to make in order to set him and his little family up for life… But dude doesn’t know anything about this movie outside of the fact that its very much within his wheelhouse and that a friend and former co star of his trusts the secretive, smooth talking director, and while we as an audience are never given a number, he’s to be paid handsomely for his role in this “movie”. I mean, they never even give him a script or let him see where he’ll be shooting or with who he’ll be acting with until it's happening, they just put an earpiece in his ear and talk him through it. As you can probably guess, this results in some surprises for him when he’s just thrust into situations he is uncomfortable with doesn’t want to be a part of, essentially telling the director that he draws the line at what would be torture porn. Now, fast forward to when dude (Milos) tries to quit and they get real weird with him. Like…. They really roofied dude on the 18th and had him running around town on the 21st trying to figure out why he was covered in blood, couldn’t find his family, and couldn’t remember the last three days. As the movie begins to show flashes of his memories and he slowly begins piecing things together, it becomes clear that his missing time is rather…. upsetting to say the least. And when I say that finding out what happened within his blackout period was fucked…. It was fucked.
Although I didn’t tap out during the course of this movie, this was definitely a movie I could’ve used trigger warnings and breaks to get through. The plot and the way it all kept me on the edge of my seat, constantly thinking “oof… ok, but the worst has to be over now, things can’t get worse…” is something I haven’t had a movie do since I watched the 3rd installment of The Human Centipede trilogy (although that was far less well done on many, many levels). While I can praise the acting and say that I loved the twists of the plot that I hadn’t seen coming, seeing this film has really reinforced my belief that a movie being impressive on any level doesn’t mean it warrants more than one viewing of the film, and trust me, if you watch this, its definitely a movie that only needs to be watched once.
#fizziepop thoughts#trigger warnings are needed on this film#you only need to watch this once#horror movies#horror review#movie review#a serbian film#disturbing movies#graphic movie
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20 fanfic questions
Tagged by @otterandterrier for this one!
How many works do you have on AO3?
27
2. What's your total AO3 words count?
247,251
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Star Wars
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Purpose of Heritage (140)
Every Version of You (83)
Collateral (80)
Tell Your Sister (71)
Confirmed by Sources Close to the Subject (68)
Some of this was actually really surprising -- I did not know a one-shot had edged ahead of Collateral on the kudos front (and I definitely would not have expected that one-shot to be Every Version of You).
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I try to! I think the earliest comments on my first fic never got replies because I didn't know what I was doing exactly, but I do try to respond at least on AO3. I know leaving comments takes effort, and I genuinely appreciate them so much, and I like talking to people about stuff I've written. So...it seems like a good thing to do.
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Oof, it would probably be Collateral if I hadn't added the epilogue, but I did, and that epilogue is angsty af but it also ends on a rising note, so I don't think it fully counts.
So, that being said, I think it's actually one of my more recent ones: Entirely Shattered. Everything's broken at the end of that one. And, like, we know it'll be fine eventually, but they sure don't.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I think several fit the bill, but my favorite of those is Confirmed by Sources Close to the Subject
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Not so far. The only objectively negative comment I've received is someone who is actually really angry with JJ Abrams and/or Rian Johnson and just decided I was a good outlet for that via anonymous guest comment on FFN. Also, I'm like 90% sure that comment was left by one of my regular readers over on FFN due to some weird circumstances surrounding it and overall vibes, and if that's the case, they're still reading and commenting even after that negative comment was left so...whatever. Otherwise, I've not really received hate. A couple that have been like...passive-aggressive unsolicited concrit, if there exists such a thing, but meh.
9. Do you write smut. If so what kind?
Nope, not something I'm into.
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
I don't, and I don't read them either. I hesitate to say "never" because you never know what sort of inspiration might strike, but I don't think I'll ever write a crossover.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not to my knowledge, but I've only been posting for like...10 months
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Not to my knowledge
13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?
I haven't, and I'm honestly not even sure how that works logistically speaking tbh.
14. What's your all-time favourite ship?
I mean. C'mon. (Han/Leia obviously. Though in revisiting The Hunger Games this year, I have a new appreciation for Peeta/Katniss)
15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
I'm not like...throwing in the towel on this one, but I have a WIP called Macabre that I had originally started for Han/Leia Appreciation Week and it got replaced by Brief Shadow for the "Anniversary" prompt. The whole concept is this idea that Han and Leia celebrate the anniversaries of every time they should have died but didn't -- there's a whole backstory baked in as to how this started and how they even have the dates recorded to do this in the first place (Leia has a calendar, obviously) -- and everyone around them thinks it's kind of a, well, macabre tradition, but it's like a post-war, coping-with-humor thing for them. The problem is I spent a decent amount of time setting up the backstory and how they sort of accidentally stumbled into celebrating an anniversary the first time, and then I simply didn't know where to go from there. I do think the concept has promise, and I really like what I've written so far (I've posted multiple snippets here! Because I was so sure it would be finished and posted in August!), so I won't say never. But I seriously don't know where to go with this. (Like, honestly, if anyone has any interest in giving it a read and making suggestions, I'm game.)
16. What are your writing strengths?
I have been repeatedly told that I stay true to the characters' voices, which is really important to me, so I hope that's true. And, like, if I capture the right vibe, I can write some kind of heartbreaking gut punches.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I have a hard time writing things that are not angsty but are earnest. Like, earnest fluff. People actually saying their feelings straight-out. Anything like that. I feel like I need to talk about this in therapy or something.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
Ah...I think as long as you do your research, it can be fine? I don't really do this, though.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Okay, full-circle moment because I forget about this, but I just remembered it recently. I usually say that the first fandom I wrote for was Left Behind: the Kids and that is the first fandom I posted anything for. But, but, the first time I entered a Star Wars phase, I found out fanfiction was a thing, and before my 11-year-old self was exposed to some racy Trip to Bespin fic that scarred me and made me scared to look for fanfiction (this was the late '90s. The Internet was the Wild West and I don't think people were rating their fics, or at least not in a way that was clear to me. I had no real way to avoid running into stuff I didn't want to see, at least not that I knew of), I had actually started writing a little story that I was going to submit to some fansite I found. I remember nothing of it except it took place on Endor the morning after the Battle of Endor and Han had asked Leia to marry him. I actually don't even think I had a plot fleshed out. I just really wanted Han and Leia to get married.
I mean, girl, same.
When I say they're my OTP, they are my OTP.
20. Favourite fic you've ever written?
Complete dark horse moment here, but I realized today, that I actually think it's Brief Shadow. Like, I do think Purpose of Heritage is going to hold a special place in my heart if it doesn't drive me insane first, but I packed a lot into less than 800 words for Brief Shadow and I'm really proud of how it turned out.
I think everyone I'd tag got tagged by @otterandterrier (thanks for the tag!), but if you want to participate, please do! These are fun.
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hafkhsdahafskdfaljksjhfalafasd okay so i got. the whole. 'you're one of the good ones' thing from one of my managers at work about the whole. you know. not making the cis people too uncomfortable about my pronouns thing and. like. oof.
there's the 'thanks i hate it' of it all. but also. i thought i was kinda on the 'no more nice good little respectable trans ambassador' program after a previous situation. so it's like huh what that's not actually what i was going for. but also i mean it's not like i'm actually looking to put myself into a situation at work if i can help it? and i feel weird and conflicted because there is a little bit of it that is actually a little vindicating to get this kind of feedback that shows [ex mentor figure] as pretty unreasonable in comparison. like I knew she was being unreasonable but like this is a pretty traditional corporate retail kinda environment and the powers that be are like. doing their best to be supportive about stuff they're unfamiliar with. and then there's the feeling weird about feeling a little vindicated. and then there's just the feeling weird bc oh shit fuck c'mon i didn't ask to be the standard you're gonna hold your future trans employees to. fuck's sake i'm a recovering people-pleaser with an overdeveloped sense of impulse control and six bad jokes in rainbow shoelaces.
and yeah corporations aren't your friend and your boss isn't your friend yadda yadda and also like. generally speaking i get on fine with my managers as human people who mean well and this one was definitely going for 'trying to convey positive feedback' and walked right into it. so i'm trying to be like. 'well everyone has their own deal and some folks have things a lot harder than I do and it's tough to find a balance' and 'yeah no obviously most everyone here has been well-meaning and i'm not looking to give anyone a hard time' and 'i'm glad you guys recognize what i contribute and that i can rely on you if i need to'. aaand i think i tried to convey something to the effect of 'people have really weird perceptions about the whole Being Offended thing' that didn't really seem to register and i was really not prepared to go into the 'no we are definitely still way more scared of you than you are of us.' because. you know. as it turns out we are in fact more scared of our cisgender corporate environments than they are of us. and you're my boss and i'm on the clock and i'm running the math on how well-behaved i am in your presence at all times.
and i'm not gonna say 'hey ouch that's not the compliment you think it is.' and i'm not gonna say 'yeah you don't know how much math i'm doing every time I get misgendered and the cpu background programs it takes to figure out whether and how to address a situation' and 'thanks i've spent a year probably doing way more than this place deserves because what happens if There's a Situation and i don't have the social capital of being Hard Worker and Plays Well With Others and Not A Snowflake' and 'this conversation is taking an entire spoon right now can I go put up this price tag i was printing out'
I think I said something about how it's only going to get funnier every time someone tries to she/her me as my funny little beard grows in. WHICH BY THE WAY the past couple of months i have had to do so much less math. or a very different and much funnier kind of math. nothing makes me feel more like '5 creachers in the proverbial trenchcoat with a top hat and fake mustache who are Getting Away With Something' than getting bro-talked by a dude who read me as a dude. absolutely wild. how do you do fellow dudes.
idk the point i think really is the background numbers. and the fuckinh arbitraryness of it all. like there's never really going to be able to calibrate for who's going to be Chill About Your Deal and who's going to take the slightest reminder of your existence as an inconvenience and who's just going to roll with the kind of default assumptions that you've forgotten how to fathom. and most of the time it's the awkward and well-meaning people who are just gonna be there. and kind of exhausting.
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My hesitancy around to say that sensory processing issues should be considered a symptom of things like asd, ADHD, anxiety, etc. Is because that tendency of people to get defensive over symptoms. Over time I have seen less and less understanding of sensory processing issues as something common to people with many different types of neurodivergencies, or at least less acknowledgement of that fact.
I've often seen things say they're accessible for asd/adhd when they only accommodate for sensory issues but not for the social issues or difficulties with change that come with asd, or the attention and execution function issues with ADHD. Or over time it's been more often I see people talking about sensory processing issues being an ASD/ADHD thing and not acknowledging the fact that it's a symptom that's not specific to them (some even getting upset when people try to bring that up).
I'm not against the idea that people consider their sensory issues a symptom or an inherent part of their disabilities, or the idea that people might experience the same symptoms differently because of other things they've got going on. But it feels like more and more there's no acknowledgement of the fact that the psychiatric field itself doesn't agree on whether sensory issues should be a symptom or their own thing, that for some people sensory processing issues are their own thing that's comorbid with the other things they've got going on.
I'm just tired. I spent most of my childhood having to prove to adults around me that my sensory processes issues did actually exist and were actually pretty severe. I don't want to now have to be arguing about the standalone sensory processing disorder diagnosis I've had since I was 4, or having to repeatedly assert that I'm not autistic people literally just see the awkwardness from my trauma and the severe sensory processing issues and make an assumption. While still having to convince people sensory processing issues are an actual thing and that I experience them, because people irl generally don't even know what sensory processing issues are
Oof yeah. I'm sorry people are making assumptions and jumping to conclusions, it can feel very invalidating honestly. As if the symptom isn't worth talking about on its right. Or alternatively as if "well if you're NOT Y, clearly you could never relate to X", when X is in fact a huge part of your life.
And meanwhile as you say, people hear autism and go "oh yeah! I know autism! It's the sensory processing disorder right?" ... which is invalidating of everyone involved really, and also results in things like sensory hyposensitive austistic people's needs not being recognized, and people being upset when the austistic person doesn't read the room right or can't speak or whatever else they might have going on that doesn't fit that narrative of "kinda awkward and super sensitive".
I hope both psychiatry, the mh community and the cultures around us, will start to think more in terms of symptoms, experiences and individual struggles, rather than distinct diagnostic categories. Because more and more I feel that these sharp distinctions are harmful - to our community and culture as well as at a personal psychological level.
In a weird way I feel like the whole discourse surrounding the sharpness of distinction within queer self-identified labels comes partially as a cultural response to the societal and medical discourse surrounding mh labels, but that might be a reach. It's certainly a part of the same cultural wave, which emphasizes a need for communal (or medical) approval of labels and experiences and the relationship between them..
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when you don't have anything better to do = open tumblr
or, ahem, i'm just chilling at work atm 😂😂 and that pic is the only ff pic i have in this work laptop (back from the new year fortune event \o/)
hhhh i miss being able to play games randomly on weekdays :c altho playing at night after work isn't anything bad, but it just feels limited still. and feels like more than half of those limited times, i've spent in helping people progging/clearing raids 😂 still lots of fun~
today, the new ultimate (omega) will be released, and i still have no intention of ever trying any ultimate fight because my casual ass will suffer and my static will suffer even more l m a o
anyway... ff stuff has been the same as usual, since i can't really play much. now on to the other, more irl related stuff..................... boys.
boys.
boys be bad LOL
(kinda weird actually ranting here cos you'll never know when one of them will somehow get access to this blog and then realize "o fuck that is about me" HAHHA)
altho in all honestly i dont really care 😂
lets just say.. so far some stuff has been... distasteful....... and its even more than 1 guy at around the same time lmao rip (not in the dating multiple guys ofc, the step before that.) the idea of dating itself is not bad, its always welcome. but. but. o boi, so many cringes happening these days.. i can only pray for the best oof too tired to waste extra energy.....
(and oh gosh please someone put him on the right track again cos im not gonna do it--not enough fucks given 😂)
okay... enough about boys problem. still contemplating whether i'll go back to tonberry next month or not hm. cant decide yet, cos i do feel both option (staying / transferring) are good enough hm. we shall see
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Kurt Glee Rewatch: Acafellas
Oof this ep. Happy to skip all the Will stuff... Honestly, for teen shows, I hate when so much time is spent on the adults? Like, if I wanted that, I’d watch a drama about adults? This is a high school show? We care about the kids? They should be focus. Imagine the show with like... even half the amount of Will plot. More time on the New Directions... would be so much better. Maybe Matt would get a line lol
This outfit will always kill me. Kurt babe, no.
And tbh... Rachel has a point? Legit every ND performance, their choreo is just... not the best? Esp compared to VA. I’ll discuss more later but... they could use some help with the dancing. And once they have more members, they can try something more interesting than standing in a line or walking in circles and jumping.
Anyway...
Aww Kurtcedes!! Notice Kurt not only has hairspray, but also extra clothes in his locker. Prob bc of dumpsters/slushies. Yikes.
And poor Mercedes, all lonely. Does make me wonder about her life before. She has church choir friends and she didn’t seem super unpopular until glee club? Who did she hang with??
And the crush... Like she is sus at first, but Quinn and Santana ofc try to sway her. And I get it, Kurt is the first guy to be sweet to her and they def have fun together. And you know what, kudos for Mercedes for looking past stereotypes and giving it a chance. Bc yah, writers def put a lot of stereotypes into Kurt...
I wonder if he was just making a joke or if he actually practiced kissing his elbow lol. And notice, he’s much more comfortable being close with Mercedes, linking arms. So sweet.
Ah, the Lincoln Navigator. I do wonder how into cars Kurt was... we deserved more mechanic!Kurt (esp since we know he worked in the shop)
First mention of his dad. He’s all set up as prob being anti-gay. I wonder about Burt’s intentions. We see in 2009 how he threatened to take away Kurt’s sewing machine. They aren’t v close yet, so when it comes to laying down the law Burt is kinda flying blind. And part of this is his discomfort with Kurt being fem, but I’m sure part of it is his dad worrying. He doesn’t want his son to have a hard life.
And aw, Mercedes thinking she’s asking out Kurt while he’s just happy to have a friend to watch Liza Minelli with. Oof.
I also love how many VA performances we see and still no Jessie. He was just... away for the first semester. Or something.
So we had the ‘Gay-vention’ bc Kurt is ‘lady fabulous’ oof.
And he wore a corset to class? And we don’t see this?? Rude.
And the iconic. Kurt is just so relaxed and happy and then Mercedes drops the bomb and Kurt is just. Shook. He just wanted a friend. He’s def not ready to come out, but he thought it was pretty clear without him having to actually say it.
He says he made it obvious that he liked someone else? But his crush on Finn doesn’t seem v overt yet? Maybe he was more open around Mercedes? Or maybe it was just bc they needed the setup for him to say Rachel?
Either way, poor Kurt gets his windows busted, but he also witnesses the amazing performance. Def one of the best from s1
Him crying int he background, aww poor guy. He loves his car.
Ah, misfits banding together. The lesson we’ll learn every ep this season lol.
Dakota is a jerk but omg his lines
“Artie you’re cut, you’re not trying hard enough” “At what?” “At walking”
Well, at least he knows Artie’s name??
“Stay away from aerosol cans cuz you could burst into flames at any second” omg poor Kurt. Glad he joins the walkout bc he’s not down for this bs.
Kurt says he has a tiara collection and we never see it. See, we keep getting told that Kurt dresses ‘like a girl’ but never really see it? He plays with gender, sure, but his style is always more masc leaning. Just not ‘typical’ masc so ppl find it weird. Ugh.
Also, his locker. Having guys abs... yeah, not exactly hiding lol. And the quote says “I would never ever have had the confidence to be in a school play” and excuse while I overthink.
I tried googling and don’t think it’s from anything specific? If someone knows, pls let me know. Also, just makes me even more sad he never got to properly star in... any play? We had a bit in Rocky Horror and he was great as Riff Raff but just... I’ll go into it s3 but damn it bugs me.
Anyway, shows how great Kurtcedes is bc she immediately goes to apologize, he trusts her enough to come out... like this is Glee, it could easily have been dragged out, but they settle it here in this sweet scene...
And that hesitation, the little choke on the word, this is definitely he’s said the words out loud and my heart cannot take it. I love that he gets this, he gets to come out. Everyone assumed his sexuality, but he gets this moment with Mercedes where she was ready to accept his crush on Rachel but he takes the step to open up and come out and I just love that.
And interesting how we get this and then the coming out to his dad, but not to everyone else? Maybe after Preggers he just accepts the comments? Doesn’t deny it? Bc ppl all assume he’s gay anyway.
And that also makes it so much harder bc he’s not ‘straight passing’ so even when he’s closeted everyone keeps bullying him for something he was barely able to admit to himself.
And Chris Colfer has talked about this, how after Preggers the media all just assumed he was gay too and he couldn’t really control his coming out and that breaks my heart and I could have a whole rant about media but.... not the time.
So ya, it sucks that Kurt didn’t have as much control, I’ll discuss more in Preggers tho.
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𝗬𝗔𝗡𝗚 𝗝𝗨𝗡𝗚𝗪𝗢𝗡: 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗛𝗜𝗚𝗛 𝗦𝗖𝗛𝗢𝗢𝗟 𝗕𝗢𝗬𝗙𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗗
an entire sweetheart mixed with a decent amount of a pain in the ass. he had been your friend before anything, so you know how he functions, having spent years with him. honestly, calling him your bf makes you feel a tad bit weirded out for a seconf because you had always called him your best friend for so long ugh
it’s always a good kind of weird though :( it feels very surreal.
none of you wanted to risk breaking your whatever sort of tension filled friendship going on.
he had actually prepared to confess to you on multiple occasions with all of the scripted words and all that jazz, but each time, when push came to chove, he would chicken out lmao
same would be for you, too nervous to do the deed and just. freaking. confess???
honestly, life would have been so much easier for the two of you had either of you put on your “big boy pants” on lmfao
your confession would end up being a spur of the moment kind of deal
rest is under the cut!
you’d be play-fighting each other in his room since he wanted to test out his new taekwondo skills on you smh (which reminds me!! you definitely have had a few bruises because you challenged him bahahaha)
and you’d roll around on the floor trying to outmaneuver each other and lock them down
bam.
your forehead smashed against his and then the back of your head ended up thonking on the side of his mattress ;-; pain.
he is dying out of laughter when that happens :’) he is wheezing and struggling to breathe, immediately going over to your side to pull you up and cradling your head in his arms
not thinking about anything because it all seemed very funny, he would press a kiss on your forehead where you had bumped into him :((((((
and then
yeah he would burn bright red when he realised what he did sdfbvhfcb
you’d just sit there, frozen and baffled by the events that had just occurred.
cue the awkward silence because you are teens and have to make everything so awkward lmfao honestly his blinks are so cute istg he would be looking like a deer caught in headlights
you would wordlessly decide not to talk about whatever that had just happened to each other and bring it up huhuuhuh.
the tension would still linger the following days though djbvfj every brush of your hands, every stray look casted at each other, every smile and laugh would feel so much more different than they were before.
one day you would both have enough of stepping around egg shells around each other and just burst :(( cue the awkward teen confessions hehe oml he would feel like crawling into a hole and just... stay to rot because he stumbled over his words a few times while trying to say that he likes you ;-; cute.
after that, it’s pretty smooth sail though wbk yang jungwon best boy :(
your friends would look suspisciously at you whenever you’d have one of those silent conversations with your eyes during class :’)
jungwon isn’t sappy, he hates mushy gushy yucky sweet stuff bahahaha. that’s why it still feels like you are just two best friends who sometimes hold each others’ hands for a little too long, stare at each others’ faces for a little more than usual and stuff :(((( just very wholesome without being too djcnvldfjkbd if you know what i mean
that doesn’t mean that he won’t do sweet gestures to you both at school and when you hang out together outside :(
he would take your bag out of your hold without giving it much thought, walk according to your own pace and let you rest your head on his shoulders to take a nap during breaks if you felt tired ;-;
istg everything feels so natural with him once you get past that awkward “are we friends? are we more than friends?” stage :’)
you would attend his tournaments and cheer for him ugh <//3 his heart would definitely burst when he sees you on the side with his mom and sister sdjcbjcb (i’m imagining this and busting a big fat uwu internally because tournaments have such a special atmosphere imo. i miss it oof- ;-; )
he would definitely be shy whenever his friends tease him about his actions near you dfuhbdfj wants to curl into a ball and roll away merrily lmao
would walk you to your classes if you have seperate ones :(
also, r.i.p because he would definitely be giving you funny faces whenever you try to give a presentation or answer a question on the board bahahah
a lot of high fives for any small accomplishment lmao it’s very endearing
always searches around for you whenever he is happy or nervous :(((( just- he is always on the lookout for you okay? he feels more relaxed if he knows you are there
when you two are alone, he loves to sneak his fingers through yours and intertwine them together, loving the way it would feel. it’s very comforting for him :(
also, he doesn’t mention it, but he dies and cries a little inside whenever you play with his locks because IT. FEELS. SO. GOOD. IT’S SO CUTE. PLEASE NEVER STOP TOUCHING HIS HAIR.
he somehow remembers every detail about yo and the smallest things you ever mentioned :( uses that ability to surprise you ;-; <//3
also, play dates with maeumi ;-;-;-;-;-; you’d run around and goof off, just the three of you :(( he always has a blast with you and just generally loves the time he spends with you <//3
he loves teasing you and judges you for your horrible decisions a lot lmao like that one time you decided to mix two unmixable ingredients together in your smoothie and almost ended up throwing up the drink in his kitchen sink lmfao
he has so so so many blurry pictures of you taken at who knows what hour and where because you literally cannot make out anything from the picture except the fact that it’s you bahaha
he has his homescreen set as you :(( he kept the shot of you playing with the plushy claw machine with your wide eyes and excited jumping when you managed to win a llama plush toy as his wallpaper for the longest time even though the quality wasn’t the nicest since he had also been just as excited as you were :’(((
smiles dumbly to himself any time he opens his phone lmao he also has blackmail material with your meme faces he had manage to catch vidsjkcn;jk not that you don’t have the exact same stuff as him >:)
you caught him singing once and would never let him down because HE. SOUNDED. SO. GOOD.?????
you would beg to make him sing any chance you got because everyone deserved to be serenaded by his honestly very unique and loveable voice ugh
he would end up agreeing to participate in a mini karaoke event that had popped up at your school, goofing off for you but still sounding amazing istg how is he real???
you have more than a few recordings of his dance covers he would show you sometimes and you would learn new choreos together :((( you’d almost die laughing the first time you saw him popping in his sleep, a recording of that stashed in your phone storage bahaha
also, jungwon may not be clingy at school or outside, but whenever you have sleepovers together,,, oh boy is he soft ;-;
once he is tired and ready to just crash and sleep, he would let down his teasing and transform into a softie <//3 i just cry at the thought of his holding you by your middle and not letting you go anywhere while he starts dozing off ;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;
he is a shy boy when it comes to physical affection, so no pda lmao not in public he would absolutelu combust :’)
but when no one is there to watch, he smiles so wide when you pepper his face with kisses ;-;
i’m soft <//3
loves waddling slowly around while hugging you, swaying left and right while his arms are wrapped around you and you try to just go the living room to grab your phone from the table sjbfdhcb
loves it when you cup his face and run your thumb over his dimples ;-;-;-;-;-;-;
oof- anyways, i’m getting carried off omg okay bye this is the end of it <//3
#enhypennetwork#enhypen imagines#enhypen scenarios#enhypen headcanons#enhypen x reader#enhypen x gender neutral reader#enhypen jungwon#jungwon x reader#jungwon fluff#jungwon imagines#enhypen fluff
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A prompt, my dear. Hermione and Draco + “who hurt you?”
Draco Malfoy was a lot of things, the majority of which were less than desirable to any sensible person, but one thing he was not was late. His punctuality was a point of pride, in a sea of arrogance no doubt, but Hermione had come to appreciate it over the course of their working relationship. It was something she could rely on, something immovable in an otherwise dangerously murky situation. He may needle her ceaselessly and leave her to do the lions share of the paperwork, but he was always there when he was expected, an effortless air of smugness clinging to him like bad cologne.
This Sunday, however; this unremarkable, overcast Sunday in late September he was late. It was the day after her 24th birthday as well as their final meeting. The report had been ostensibly completed, the field work essentially finished, and the conclusion inevitably drawn. After the better part of a year dedicating 1/3rd of every weekend to spending most of the day with Malfoy, Hermione's Sundays were about to become her own once more; a prospect she was not all that excited about.
Everytime the chirp of the bell above the door announced a new arrival, she would glance over, expecting to see a shock of platinum hair above a signature sneer and everytime, she was disappointed.
"Another tea, miss?" The waitress asked, her expression a perfect blend of professionalism and pity.
"No, no thank you." Hermione spared another look out the window, searching for him among the crowd. "Actually, I think I'm done here. Could I get the check?"
Bundled up against the autumn chill, Hermione paid and left the Cafe' and it's memories behind. It wasn't quite noon yet, and the streets were slowly filling with the townspeople emerging to go about their days. She smiled at a few passersby but was otherwise lost in her own thoughts as she made her way to the Apparition point.
Maybe Malfoy had just decided their final meeting wasn't all that important. To be fair it was more of a formality than anything else. His decision to not show would have no negative consequence on anything other than her feelings. Feelings, of course, that she was deliberately not thinking about.
As she rounded the corner, absorbed in her denial, she didn't see him until it was too late. With an audible "oof" she ran straight into Malfoy, colliding chest to chest. She immediately bounced off but he caught her arm before she could hit the sidewalk.
"What--Malfoy?"
"Graceful as always, Granger." He let her go and she stared, wide eyed and confused, at the state of his face.
"Merlin! Your face it's--"
"Your manners leave so very much to be desired." He looked cross but it was hard to tell beneath the bruising. An ugly, mottled patch of purple marred the left side of his face, stark and violent against his pale skin. It was fresh, the edges red with the recent impact, and it appeared to have just narrowly missed his eye.
"Malfoy," she reached her hand out, ghosting her fingertips over the bruise. "What happened?"
He sneered at her and jerked away. "Keep your obligatory Gryffindor concern to yourself, Granger."
"It's not an obligation!"
"Says the war hero."
"Will you--ugh!" She huffed and dragged him back around the corner, off of the sidewalk and into an alley. "What happened?" She repeated.
"Nothing."
"Malfoy."
He looked around, deliberately avoiding making eye contact with her. "I made a wrong turn at Diagon Alley, is all."
"A wrong turn?" The incredulity in her voice was palpable. "To where? A boxing ring?"
"Just drop it, Granger."
"I will not just drop it. Look--look at your face!" She closed the space between them. "Malfoy, please. What happened?"
He sighed and the rigidity of his shoulders softened. "I forgot, okay? I went to Flourish and Blotts to get you your bloody birthday gift and when I left, I ran into some adoring fans."
"What--"
"Our former school chums don't take kindly to my presence in Diagon Alley and, after our last little spat, I'd forgotten the warning they'd left me with." Malfoy's jaw tensed and he squinted up into the clouded sunlight. "They took it upon themselves to remind me."
Hermione balled her hands into fists to keep them from shaking. "Who?"
"It doesn't matter, Granger."
"Who?" She took a steadying breath. "Who hurt you?"
"I don't know. I vaguely recognized them from Hogwarts. It's fine."
It wasn't fine. It was categorically not fine. Malfoy was hardly the first of their class that had been on the wrong side of the war to be attacked. Harry had spent a significant amount of time trying to dispel such violent grudges and, to the best of her knowledge, it had been handled. Clearly, she was mistaken.
"We need to report this to the Ministry. Harry needs--"
"Absolutely fucking not." Malfoy gave her an indignant look. "The last person that needs to hear about this is Saint Potter."
"Malfoy, Harry's job is dealing with--"
"No, Granger. I said no."
"So what? Those nasty little insects just get to get away with it? No. I refuse. We didn't go to bloody war--"
"I was on the wrong side of that war, remember? So, yeah, we did go to war for this exact scenario to exist." He could see the lack of effect his words were having written across her face. "Granger. Please. I don't want this to become another of your crusades."
She reeled as if she'd been slapped. "Crusades?! Malfoy, it's about the injustice of it! You don't deserve to be attacked in the streets for something you did nearly ten years ago!"
"The court of public opinion begs to differ."
"Oh they'll beg alright," she snapped. At her genuine anger, his features softened and Malfoy gave her an unreadable look before looking away.
"You're such a fucking Gryffindor." He said it with an air of affection, though, and it helped to ground her back in the now.
"Thank you." Once more she placed her hand upon his bruised cheek and, to her surprise, he leaned into the touch. Her breathe caught in her lungs and she swallowed. "We--we should take care of that."
"It's just a simple spell. I'll handle it."
"No," she insisted and stepped away from him. "I will. It's the least I can do."
"This is hardly your fault."
"You went to Diagon Alley for me, remember?" She looked him up and down. "Speaking of..."
"I've been attacked and you're worrying over your stupid gift?" His tone was lighter than it had been since she'd ran into him.
"Of course I am. It's not everyday the evil Draco Malfoy buys you a gift." Hermione nodded to the Apparition point behind them. "Let's go."
"What about the Cafe? You can't honestly expect me to deny our Waitress her weekly opportunity to oogle at me." He gestured to his outfit: an expensive and perfectly tailored muggle suit that Hermione had forced him to buy after he showed up to their first meeting in robes.
"I've already been. It'd been weird to go back now. Besides, I think the bruise will overshadow your fancy slacks."
"Women like a man with scars."
She snorted. "It's hardly a battle scar, you git." when he gave her a pleading look, she rolled her eyes and looked around, to make sure they were alone. Satisfied with the lack of muggles, Hermione drew her wand and tapped it gently to his cheek. The static heat of magic bloomed between them and the ugly purple faded away, leaving his pale cheek unblemished once more. "There."
In the process of her healing, Malfoy had stepped completely into her personal space and the look he was giving her was heavy, deliberate.
"This isn't over, Malfoy. I'll find out who did this, with or without your help. They don't get to just attack you and get away with it."
"I'm hardly a weakling, Granger. I fought back."
"Good. It'll make them easier to identify."
"You're not going to let this go." It was not a question.
"No. I'm not."
"Why?"
"Because." She gave him a defiant look and he tipped her chin up with his hand. "You're my--"
"What? I'm your what?"
"Friend?"
"Is that all?" He was dangerous, but in a completely different way to the bully he'd been in their youth.
"That depends."
"On?"
"On what you got me for my birthday." She grinned and he laughed, pressing his forehead to hers a moment before pulling away and offering her his arm. She looped hers around it and let him steer them back in the direction of the Cafe.
After a lunch of finger sandwiches and tea, Malfoy finally handed her a perfectly wrapped gift that she immediately tore into. It was the latest book in a series on beasts that Rolf Scamander had been releasing, and it wasn't supposed to be out for another week.
"How did you get this?"
Malfoy shrugged, as if it was the least important thing in the world. "Money is an exceptionally good incentive."
"I love it. Thank you." She beamed at him and he cleared his throat as if it would distract her from the flush creeping up his neck.
"It's no big deal, Granger."
"To you maybe. It is to me. You know how I feel about birthday gifts." They both thought back to the spectacle she'd made of his back in June.
"I did fight for my life while I was out getting it." He grinned but the smile faded at the sharp look she gave him. "I'm joking, of course. Just a little fisticuffs, nothing serious."
"I'm sorry, Malfoy. I really am. You didn't have to go all the way to Diagon Alley for this."
"Sure I did."
"Just submitting your half of the report would be gift enough."
"Lucky for you I've done both. Besides, I'm sick of using that bloody report as an excuse to be around you." Hermione blinked, unable to process the weight of what he'd said. At the shock on her face, he shrugged again. "Come on, Granger. You can't possibly think I care about work this much."
"I--you--what?"
He leaned forward and captured her chin in his hand. "My fierce, naive little lion. You're horribly dense." Malfoy gave her a soft kiss on the forehead and pulled away. "Let's go before the Waitress gets jealous."
"But. What."
"I've rendered the great Hermione Granger speechless. I am truly magnificent." His laugh brought her to her senses and she launched herself across the table to kiss him.
"Sod the waitress."
She did, in the end, figure out who hurt him and in true Hermione Granger fashion, made them rue the day they laid hands upon someone she loves.
#Dramione#Draco Malfoy#Hermione Granger#Skitterfics#Hmmmm I don't care for the way this ended but I am just rewriting it endlessly at this point
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Congratulations on 200 followers :) <3 Can I request a bakugou x touch starved reader?. Thank you so much ^^
AHHH thank you so much dear! And yes, of course you may!!! I had a blast writing this- if it’s not what you were looking for I’m sorry- I just think everyone feels this way now that classes are back in the swing of things- anyway- please enjoy- 💛
I really like this
Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x Reader
Genre: fluff
Word count: ...
Synopsis: Over the past month-with all the stuff U.A. demands of you-it was hard to see your boyfriend- even so- this past week has been extra rough with the first exam if the semester coming up. With all that stress building up- it’s safe to say: you are touch starved.
————————————————————————
“Hey Siri... how long until February 1st?”
....”it’s two days until then”
What?? Wasn’t is a week just yesterday? No no no no no no no This isn’t possible. Ever since the start of the semester y/n along with everyone else in class 1 A has been stressing over school related subjects. Even Bakugou found himself staying up a little later to study. Even so, having two days until the first exam of the season was not good. You had spent nearly all your time working and getting school work done in hopes that the weekend would come and you could rest but now.... looking at what’s on your plate- that doesn’t look possible.
You walk your way over to the mini fridge in your dorm and pull out a water bottle- you may be sleep deprived but hydration is important. Sitting back at your desk you loom over your notes and then look back at the practice problems. Why was the material not adding up? Why couldn’t you focus? Why were your eyes so dry? Ugh
It had been well over a week since you and Bakugou had even talked beyond a normal “hey” or “nice job” For most couples that’s strange- but for you two it’s not actually that weird. Even so-Katsuki watches you in class and he can see how tense you are.
————————————————————————
Rubbing your eyes you stops short... “did I put on mascara this morning” running though your brain...” no no I woke up late I didn’t have time” you promptly gives your eyes a rough rub and then harshly push your palms along your neck, over the base of your shoulders and up the back of your hairline. And even though your so stressed- even though you knows you should be focusing- it’s just not coming together, Aizawa’s voice is too dull and you’re too tired and right now you just wants to get school over with so you can get back into the routine of life.
“Your eyes look like bruises!!” Mina harshly whispers “are you alright y/n?!”
“Minaaaaaaa” you whine, “You’re not supposed to point that out you know.”
“I’m sorry y/n! Are you stressed over the exam? Some of the other girls are coming over to Momo’s dorm tonight to study- if it would make you feel better maybe you can come too.” She smiles so warmly all you can do is nod.
“Maybe, thanks!! I’m just so worried and even though I’ve read all the material I have a hard time remembering all the details.”
“Well then, we‘ll be sure to go over all of it tonight! Hang in there y/n!”
And even as your shoulders slump back and you hands go down to grab and massage your legs you can see Katsuki out of the corner of your eye squinting at you.
———————————————————————
“Wait I thought the Hero Legislations began when quirks began to emerge?” Ochako smacks her temples, “that makes sense doesn’t it?”
It does...... right?
“Well it took awhile for people to know what quirks even were- even then for those born with quirks to age into an adulthood so that is became customary for rules to be implemented. It probably took a lot longer than you think Ochako...” Even Momo looks tired and your hand hurts so bad from writing notes you have to stop every so often to shake your hand and crack your wrist.
“Oh... right....” Uraraka smiles, “that makes sense.”
“We don’t have long before the exam- not even 24 hours- I think we should all rest up and be sure to have a good breakfast in the morning. Look over your notes one more time.” Momo isn’t smiling but she looks content as she pulls her ponytail down. “Good luck- see you tomorrow evening” and then you stretch and get up to head to your dorm.
Walking up the stairs to you almost don’t notice the Bakugou-shaped lump at your door. He’s sitting cris-cross and looking at his phone.
“Katsuki.... what are you doing??”
Listen okay- you love your boyfriend- he’s great- annoying a lot of the time-but he’s great- even so- you want sleep and you just can’t sit and listen to him ramble about “stupid Deku” for hours.
He looks up at you. Silent.
And that’s scary
“Katsuki? You okay?”
He quietly stands and looks at your hand. Backing out of the way of your door- he leans on the door post.
“Open” is all he says. Way not like him either. “Open the damn door!!! I won’t ask again y/n!” Is more like him but he just stands there- bored expression on his face.
So you do- open the door I mean- and he quickly grabs at your waist and pulls you to the edge of your bed “Oof- Katsu-“
As weird as it was you couldn’t help but lean in- and your tired arms connect at the low part on his back. He’s crushing you- in a comfortable way. His face in your neck and his body radiating heat- it’s more comfort the BBC you’d felt in awhile.
“We have the exam tomorrow.” Is all you say- because really- it’s all you can think other than how you don’t want to move.
“What? You think I don’t know that?” And he bites at your shoulder. Yep. Bites it. Maybe just a nibble of annoyance.
And suddenly all your urge to read over your notes fades. You could sleep just like this.
“Bakugou- I’m gonna sleep right here” and he chuckles in confusion- and even though it’s only been a week since you’ve heard it- it feels like years.
He grabs at your waist again and presses his fingers into your side- it almost tickles- and he’s flipping you over on top of him, so your smooshed up against his chest. His hand on your neck. Rubbing at your shoulders when your hands had been the morning before.
“Let’s not go a week without this anymore” you mumble because it feels so good to be with him like this you could almost cry.
“Whatta ya talkin’ about?” He grumbles out.
“I really like this.” You say- drifting off
“Well...ugh ʸᵒᵘʳ ʷᵉˡᶜᵒᵐᵉ I guess.” He sighs.
And just as your drifting off into dream land he nuzzles his nose in your neck and hushes
“Me too.”
#my hero academia#bakugou x reader#baku no hero academia#bnha fanfiction#mha x reader#todoroki x reader#bnha x reader#todoroki x y/n#bnha bakugo katsuki#bnha shoto todoroki#bakugou fluff#dabi x reader#hawks x reader#aizawa x reader#katsuki x y/n#katsuki x reader#bakugou oneshot#bakugou fic#bakugou x y/n#shoto x reader#kirishima x y/n
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Grace and Frankie 7x1 - 7x4 thoughts
Meh? Like...I love them so much, but...meh?
(I did enjoy this line about brunch.)
I really loved season 6 of Grace and Frankie. I thought it was well-paced, largely very well-acted, generally well-written, and it culminated in a massive moment of character development for the title characters, who, having spent years growing closer and being there for each other when others could not or would not be, finally articulate to each other that they are the primary person in each other’s lives. Platonic gal pal soulmate BFF emotional support witches 4 lyfe!
I know progress isn’t always linear, and in fact is very rarely linear, but after a moment that significant, you’d think the writers on this show would maybe come up with some more interesting things for these characters to do than spin in circles?
@bristler and I watched on Friday night, and just this morning over breakfast had a good conversation about the first four episodes of the new season now that they have settled in our brains a bit. We concluded that the writing (often noticeably clunky, like the dialogue is responsible for more narration than usual) and the tone (aggressively wacky) feel really off, especially compared to the prior season. I think we diagnosed the big issue, which is that Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda are by far the most talented actors on this show (if you disagree, fight me in the parking lot) and it feels surprisingly unfortunate that their characters have, to this point in the new season, pretty much figured out their perspectives on each other. No matter how people feel about Grace and Frankie’s sexualities, the whole show has been about them finding each other and getting in deeper and deeper, and it’s less interesting to watch other characters have realizations about that than it is to watch Grace and Frankie having realizations about themselves. If the title characters are now limited to reacting to other people’s actions, and the title characters are played by the best actors on the show, the whole show’s gonna suffer. And is suffering, very much so, at least for these first four episodes. I’m definitely still excited for the final twelve in 2022 (twelve! I cannot believe this season will have sixteen eps!), but I’m pretty disappointed so far.
Stuff I Loved:
The family brunch. These families have been entwined for so long, and the backstory for this particular brunch was so fun (even though I didn’t care for the effects they did to depict Grace and Robert 25 years ago; there was no need for a visual flashback in the scene). I love that Grace hit Frankie with a wiffle ball bat. I love that the two couples realized some of the emotional reasons behind their decisions to lie to each other about Bud’s Bunny and about M’Challah. I love the way Jane Fonda sounds uttering the phrase “Bud’s Bunny” with little to no irony. I love that Grace is able to recognize and articulate just how deep and miserable her anger issues were, albeit with the continued help of her omnipresent martini, and that Frankie told her she’d now make up a holiday in order to spend more time with Grace. I really, really hope Frankie does exactly this at some point in the remaining episodes of the season. I love that Grace is generally a pretty good person now, with aspirations of being a delightful person. I love that she and Frankie don’t have it in them to stay angry with each other, and I love all the evidence that they really, really talk to each other about everything now.
Frankie talking to the man at the office (I don’t remember who he was supposed to be? A toilet manufacturer? I didn’t mention this before, but I actually got pretty high while watching?!? Believe it or not, this was the first time I smoked pot and watched Grace and Frankie at the same time despite having enjoyed both activities on their own for quite some time. I would recommend the combo! And I think I still pretty much got what was happening) about paying for the toilet parts with candy. This whole subplot with the money laundering was absurd and not that interesting, but I loved this particular scene because it was finally evidence of some really thoughtful writing. The concepts aren’t enough! You have to write them into good dialogue! And the whole cash/candy thing was a moment of dialogue that only someone as hilarious as Lily Tomlin could pull off. Which she did, IMO.
In a show about super messy people, Coyote has stayed sober this entire time. He is sober, employed, in love, and preparing to buy a full-sized house with his partner. He hasn’t murdered anyone in his family. Hasn’t even attempted murder once.
In 2017 or whatever, Grace Hanson would have been furious about Frankie using obscure Beatles references like a treasure map when hiding the cash. But here in 2021, she cooperates and even gets in on the fun. The writing is very unsubtle this season, but that did feel like a reasonably subtle moment that shows how good of a partner she is for Frankie. (Platonic, of course! So platonic. Female friendship, amirite?)
Stuff I Did NOT Love and Felt Incredibly Negative About:
Brianna. I can only conclude that June Diane Raphael has decided she’s happy with playing a character whose primary role in life is to be hot and mean. She succeeds at being hot and mean, but I have reached my limit with this character. I realize we’re only a quarter of the way into the season, but I don’t think I can take another arc about her learning to compromise only to reveal to Barry that she never intended to compromise at all. At this point, it’s both abusive and boring. How?! The Grace/Brianna parallels aren’t interesting anymore, because one character has grown and the other is stagnant. I get that Brianna was raised in an emotionally stilted environment by two unhealthy people. But I think it would be very cool if she could learn something from her mother at this point. Grace has put a ton of effort into dealing with her “rabbit-killing, mad-at-the-world anger.” She’s put a ton of effort into figuring out what makes her happy, what she wants her life to look like. She’s even started accepting her age and abilities without shame. And that growth is believable; Grace is still short-tempered and she still slugs back way too many martinis and she struggles to articulate certain things, but she’s grown into a truly lovely human. And while, as a daughter with a mother, I can absolutely attest to the fact that it can be difficult and uncomfortable to learn lessons from one’s mother, Brianna really, really should. Grace spent decades letting anger and shame trap her in a small, miserable life. Brianna—and even Mallory, who just seems like a vapid idiot this season—are traveling that same path, but there’s someone right there who could really help, maybe even more than Frankie helped when the Hanson girls were first growing up.
The arraignment. The scene might’ve been salvageable if it was filmed from Grace’s perspective, and filmed to reflect how surreal and improbable it all was. But speaking of non-linear progress, this scene erased everything Nick Skolka has done to put himself in my good graces (LOL) over the past couple seasons. I mean, I tried, man. I even wrote fic about Nick, Grace, and Frankie making a genuine effort at polyamory. But the arraignment is so emotionally manipulative, such a slap in the face of everything Grace has worked for, and while we’re certainly “supposed” to feel the weight of the moment, I mean, it’s not like we’re supposed to be like, “Oh, cool, we’re in a rom com now! This is adorable!” it still felt bad and unearned and slapdash.
And I want Frankie to process these things with her! Frankie seems so happy to have all this information about Grace and how Grace feels, but I want to see scenes in which we can gain an understanding of how Frankie actually feels. Hearing Frankie talk to other people about how Grace feels is interesting, but it’s like there’s no room in these episodes for us to learn anything new about Frankie herself.
Grace’s transitional wig. Is so. Bad. It is. Such a. Bad wig. Oof. I mean, I like what they’re doing with Grace’s hair from a plot perspective, although (see one bullet up) I would really like to get more of an understanding of what’s happening in Grace’s head, not just on top of her head. And gosh, Frankie would be a really good person to talk to about this in a conversation that lasts longer than 30 seconds. But the wig! She’s in a wig in all four episodes, of course, since Jane Fonda went grey and cut her hair short before they started filming this season. The wig for episodes 1 and 2 is fine; it’s a good approximation of Grace’s typical hair, and of course we know that canonically Grace’s hair isn’t 100% her own hair anyway. But the wig with grey roots looks so weird. The part that’s growing out doesn’t look the same as the hair on the wig from 1 and 2. And the grey roots look like a yarmulke. I cannot wait to get to the point in the season when Grace goes all the way grey.
(One more thing about the hair. I can’t let it go. I paused the show while we were watching to rant, but I’m not done.) I had the great privilege of seeing Jane Fonda in person at a protest in 2019. She is an insanely beautiful human. She was growing her hair out and it was partially dyed blonde and partially grey. It looked really cool. I am not ashamed to say I spent that day learning many things about the climate crisis and about Jane Fonda’s hair. Having seen her in real life with her real hair looking that fucking great, I just have a an extra-large grudge against everyone involved in that horrible wig. The wig is necessary, but it didn’t have to be this bad.
What Do I Care About Now?
I am pretty intrigued by the way Grace threw out her real age in a conversation with Nick and Elena. She has nothing to fear anymore! She’s so chill about aging! What could go wrong? I assume that Nick and Elena maneuvering for Nick to be on house arrest in Grace's house specifically has to do with the fact that Grace is 82. She’s gonna find out that Nick is allowed to be with her because she’s ancient and helpless and the court took pity. Or something like that. She’s going to feel betrayed on top of feeling stifled and overwhelmed by Nick’s presence. I want to see where this goes for sure.
Other than that, and other than the fact that I really do continue to believe this show is moving in a direction in which Grace and Frankie will choose each other, I feel very whatever about this whole thing. I love this show and I will always appreciate this show for giving me some incredible characters to spend years of my life writing about, and for bringing me some pretty amazing friendships. Speaking of those friendships, yesterday @ellydash and @telanu and I were talking about some of the incredible TV we’ve watched recently, like Ted Lasso and Hacks and Fleabag and Killing Eve, and how great it feels to watch beautifully written TV crafted by writers who are profoundly—organically yet intentionally—attuned to even the most minor character’s rhythm. The disappointment of these first few episodes of the new G&F season feels like a mild disappointment rather than a sharp heartbreak, and that has a lot to do with being deeply invested in other shows that could also go in all kinds of different directions but with writing I fundamentally trust.
Also Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin are my forever faves and my appreciation for their performances and general awesomeness onscreen and in life is undiminished. So that’s pretty cool.
#grace and frankie#meta by me#grace and frankie s7 spoilers#a lesbian watches ted lasso#grace hanson is a gay disaster#except#she's not even a disaster anymore#she's totally fine and men keep bothering her!#frankie bergstein is a bisexual mess
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Possession 13
Nikola spent a lot of time in her room until her period was over, the boys were just too loud even when they didn’t mean to be annoying, and she was still a bit too embarrassed to face Gally. Not only had he helped her clean the blood from her sheets while he was shirtless, she’d also made that weird, hormonal declaration to him from her balcony. But she wouldn’t take it back either because it was true, Gally was just about the sweetest person in existence even if he did have a hardened exterior, or didn’t express himself with tremendous amounts of warmth. The things he did were always just right in his own unique way.
The attention most boys gave her felt meaningless since she was the only girl. It was hard to feel special without other options to be chosen from. Did they like her personality? Did anyone like her with their brains or their heart, or just their hormones?
She wanted to think Gally cared for her beyond the superficial, but she feared the day another girl would show up that he might like better than her, or they got out and there were so many to choose from, what if he didn’t really want her but was settling because she was all there was? But that’s how life was. A small world with one girl and one Gally.
She was supposed to work on some mending that day and went to Gally’s work bench for a pair of scissors. He wasn’t anywhere in sight even as she scanned extra hard for him. She did notice Shawn looking her way and quickly averted her gaze. She grabbed the scissors and looked for a scrap of paper to leave a note on. Gally didn’t like his things going missing, so she was going to let him know she had them and where she’d be if he really needed them back. As she searched she noticed something.
Moving some things out of the way she saw drawings, somewhere between a sketch and a doodle, and it was all of her. She was shocked at how good the drawings were, but even more shocked by how beautiful the artist seemed to think she was. She’d caught some glimpses in rusty mirrors and still water, she didn’t really look that good. She couldn’t fool herself, this was Gally’s table, Gally’s stuff, so it had to be Gally’s drawings. Honestly if he saw one of his builders doodling away he wouldn’t stand for it or keep it around.
She bit back a huge smile before she covered it back up and looked around for his to-do list, maybe that would tell her where to find him. But what would she do when she found him? Say ‘hey, I saw your drawings of me,’ …then what? She just wanted to see him, just be around him, even without a reason. When she did find him he was in the dead heads with the other builders looking for any trees that could come down, or branches for fires or tools. He was busy and there was no privacy, she couldn’t play off going to see him as anything but going to see him just because she wanted to.
~~~
At dinner Gally got a huge surprise. Nikola was sitting at his usual table. It felt like his heart did an extra big thump when he saw her there in the evening glow. He saw Newt make a dash for the table as fast as his limp would let him, looking ready to be entertained by Gally who he claimed was ‘totally whipped’, whatever that meant. They were saying hello to each other as Gally sat down across from her.
“Hey,” she greeted him with a smile in front of all the other boys. “Did you get my note about borrowing your scissors today?”
“Yeah, I did,” he nodded, glancing at Newt who was watching them like they were a compelling tennis match. “Thanks for putting them back.”
“I saw your sketches,” she said innocently enough but there was flicker in her eyes that made him freeze.
The sketches. The sketches of her, she saw them, oh crap.
“They’re really good, I think you could make a perfect greenhouse if you had the glass for it,” she went on, but her eyes told him she wasn’t really talking about the greenhouse. Strange too was that she didn’t seem bothered by it in the slightest.
Gally swallowed despite not having taken a bite of food yet. “Thanks. I like to plan ahead for future possibilities.”
“You never planned for this possibility,” Newt smirked as he pointed at Nikola.
Gally shrugged. “You can’t plan for everything.”
“Very true,” Newt admitted. “I mean, you were quite worried about the effects a girl in the glade might have, but nothing terrible has happened yet and you seem to get along thick as thieves.”
Gally gave Newt a hard stare.
“He does like to keep the chaos organized, doesn’t he?” Nikola conspired with Newt, a well meaning tone in her teasing. “Honestly, what would you do without him?”
“Better question is what you’d do without him,” Newt countered. He had spent enough time with her to realize who she fancied, no matter how stoic and subtle she tried to be.
“Oof,” she got a thoughtful look on her face. “Well, I’d be homeless.”
Newt laughed and even Gally cracked a smile.
“I might be under someones thumb, too,” she went on. “Without Gally advocating for me to get on the council. I wouldn’t have my swing!”
“Yeah, I heard about that,” Newt said looking right at Gally with an almost taunting grin.
“But all that sounds pretty terrible,” she waved it off. “It’s not just about the things Gally has done for me, or what I’ve gotten from him. He’s my best friend.”
“Is he now?” Newt asked in surprise that sounded more genuine than teasing. Meanwhile Gally could feel that he had gone absolutely, unsubtly red.
“He is,” Nikola smiled, looking at Gally as she answered Newt’s question, watching him adoringly as he bashfully avoided her gaze with red cheeks and ears as he pushed food around on his plate.
“I have bad news for you, love,” Newt sighed. “Gally’s best friend is me. Isn’t that right, Gally?”
Gally looked at him with one raised brow but didn’t say anything which Newt found very amusing in itself. But then Newt gave a sigh as if the fun was over.
“I know it’s- well actually I can only try to imagine how hard it is for you being the only girl here, and how there are so many normal and fun things you should be able to do… but this place is anything but normal. I get it, I don’t mind the fun and the teasing, but there are some who might. I know it’s not fair, but try to be a bit more careful. I really would hate to see either of you get hurt if someone got the wrong idea.”
Nikola looked thoroughly chastised even though Newt had spoken so soft and kindly.
“Right. You’re right,” she nodded as she looked down at her lap and bit her lips. She looked back up with just a ghost of the smile she was wearing before. “I guess I got away from myself there. I’ll have to work on that.”
Gally felt his heart sinking in his chest. He knew Newt was right but he didn’t want her to become reserved and shy away from him just to try and keep peace with some jealous shanks. She’d done all this just because she had seen his sketches of her, had he made her that happy to begin with?
“I guess I’ll go ahead and turn in then,” She said with a shine to her eyes that he hadn’t seen on her before, but he recognized it still because even boys cried.
She said goodnight and took her plate to the kitchen before heading to her house without looking back. It was all going on behind Gally’s back and he couldn’t look at her without making it obvious, but he watched Newt watching her, his longer hair hiding his gaze from others around him.
“I’ve gotten it all wrong haven’t I?” Newt sighed after Nikola disappeared from his view.
“How’s that?” Gally asked, suddenly not so hungry anymore.
“I think you’re the one who has her wrapped around your finger,” Newt clarified making Gally blush again against his will.
“I don’t,” Gally tried to argue quietly and just earned a disbelieving look.
“You best be very careful,” Newt warned. “No one says anything around you because they know you’re protective of her, and you can beat them to a bloody pulp, but there are some boys who would be very sore if she was taken. I know you can take anyone one-on-one but I don’t know if you could take them all at once, and I’m afraid it could come to that.”
“Who is saying what about Nikola?” Gally demanded.
“Oh god, it’s mutual pining,” Newt sighed to himself tiredly as he rubbed his face. “I’m not going to tell you that because you can’t act like you don’t know and you’d end up in trouble any way. For her sake and yours just tread carefully.”
“I don’t want things to go backwards. She trusts me, she knows I’d do anything to protect her,” Gally spilled without meaning to.
“If you’re willing to do anything than do this, just back off a bit when others are around,” Newt suggested.
When Gally didn’t say anything to that Newt just shrugged and took his dishes back to the kitchen. Gally sat there at his table alone, deep in thought and murky, unhappy feelings. He stayed there so long, Fry came over himself to take his dishes to the wash. He sat there till all the others had gone to bed, knowing his thoughts would keep him awake anyway.
~~~~~
A few days passed where Nikola and Gally did the last thing on earth they wanted to do and kept their distance most of the time. But when they did get a chance to interact they both made an effort to subtly assure the other that it wasn’t personal, that nothing had changed between them.
Nikola was sitting up in her house with various scraps of things arranged on her floor and was figuring out how to recycle them into something useful when Newt called up to her. She went out on her balcony and frowned when she saw his face.
“I need you to come with me,” he said apologetically. “It’s a gathering… of sorts.”
Her heart plummeted. She was shaking as she tried to go down her ladder and it made it difficult. She didn’t say anything as she walked with Newt, her mind racing with so many things at once and her stomach feeling twisted beyond untangling.
When she stepped inside she saw Alby, Gally, and Shawn. She narrowed her eyes slightly at the latter even though she was trying very hard not to give any of her emotions away. Gally didn’t seem happy with him either and Alby just looked completely impatient. Nikola just looked at him, not willing to say a word until she knew what was going on.
Alby reached out and handed her a piece of paper. “Did you write this?”
She looked at him doubtfully as she plucked the paper from his hand and then looked down to read it, immediately seeing it was not her handwriting before she took in what it said. “No, not my handwriting,” she said quickly and passed it back.
“Read it, will you?” Alby said as he pushed it back.
She sighed but complied.
“It’s time for me to wash my sheets, why don’t you come and help me get them real good and dirty first? It was so fun last time.”
She hid her disgust and tried to morph it into confusion instead. She looked at the boys standing around her. “What the shuck does that mean?” she asked Alby like it was Greek to her.
“Shawn says he saw you and Gally washing your sheets very late one night, and Gally wasn’t fully dressed. Said you seemed very… close,” Alby explained, glancing at Shawn who had clearly orchestrated this whole thing.
“And the first conclusion you jumped to was that we were screwing?” She asked Shawn directly, as flat as possible. “No wonder you faked a note, if that’s all you’ve got to support that theory.”
“She didn’t deny it,” Shawn pointed out smugly to Alby.
“Right, because I was up late one night, I was washing my sheets, and Gally was helping me,” She admitted easily. “That all happened because I started my period in the middle of the night and had to clean blood off myself, my clothes, and my sheets before the stains set.” Everyone but Gally looked uncomfortable as soon as she said period. “And before he tells you he saw me write this note to Gally, I did write Gally a different note about taking the spare scissors when I did the mending. I can get the med journal and show you an example of Shawn’s hand writing and my own if you want, but Newt also heard me talk to Gally about the scissors that day as well.”
Newt nodded to that and Alby threw an unhappy glare at Shawn’s now pale and unamused face. “I think we’re good here, you two can go,” He said to her and Gally, his gaze still fixed on Shawn.
Gally had fixed Shawn with a glare of his own and didn’t seem to be going anywhere, even as Nikola headed toward the door.
“Gally,” Newt said with a warning tone.
Gally let his arms uncross themselves slowly, eyes fixed on Shawn for as long as he could before walking away and following Nikola out the door.
She was out there squinting in the sun waiting for him.
“At least that was easy right?” she commented as they fell into step with each other. “I know that means it’ll only be worse the next time though. I’m sorry Gally-“
“You don’t have anything to be sorry for,” He blurted, some of his anger at Shawn coming out in his tone with her. He stopped in his tracks and took a deep breath to calm down, then looked up to see her anxious face staring up at him. “You have nothing to be sorry for,” he repeated more softly, “And neither do I. He’s an idiot, and I don’t care what else he does, you’re my friend and I’m yours and I won’t allow any amount of childish jealousy to change that.”
His fists were clenched and his heart pounded in his ears. Nikola’s eyes were wide and he saw her swallow before she nodded vigorously.
“Yeah, absolutely,” she agreed. “Same here.”
Neither of them realized what it would take to keep that promise to each other.
Masterlist
@frequentlychangingfandoms @quackquackbi @poulterjonas @crazysheeplyca @pre-google @gladerscake @neilox @thesuitkovian @carp3d1em @cottoncandy-dreamxd @emilyhadenbaker
#tmr#gally#tmr gally#gally imagine#fanfic#maze runner#maze runner gally#thirsting over gally's thick ankles#Will Poulter#Will Poulter protection squad
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congrats on 200! i'd love to see Erwin x reader where they are both professors! looking forward to what you come up with, anything fluffy involving fumbling academics would be fun <3
This request... YES. ❤️ I have a huge weakness for this type of AU. (I used to teach college English classes.) And the idea of Erwin as a professor? Perfection.
Warnings: alcohol
A/N: So much awkward, adorable fluff. This ended up being longer than I expected, and I still felt like there was so much more I could write. There’s a very good chance that I’ll end up turning this into an actual fic... 😅
• • •
Erwin + Professors
It’s a few days before the fall semester begins, and you’ve just finished settling into your office. It’s small, but unlike the communal space you shared with the other TA’s back in grad school, it’s all yours. The wall-mounted shelves have been filled with books, your desk is stocked with sticky notes, highlighters, and your favorite pens, and you even managed to bring some small plants from your new apartment.
Feeling satisfied, despite the constant hum of nervous energy you’re sure will stick around until the first week is over, you sit back in your chair and rest your head against the wall. That’s when you hear it.
Sometimes I wonder, how I spend
The lonely night dreaming of a song...
It’s music, coming from the office next door — an old song you swear you’ve heard before, but you’re not sure where. When you tilt your head, listening more closely, you hear someone moving around.
When stars are bright, you are in my arms,
The nightingale, tells his fairy tale
Of paradise, where roses grew...
You’re curious about your mystery colleague. After all, it’s nearly seven o’clock on a Friday evening, and you suspect you’re the only two crazy enough to still be here. While you’ve met the department chair and a few of the other professors, you have yet to meet everyone. And nobody so far has mentioned having the corner office right next to yours.
But then your phone vibrates, reminding you that if you don’t hurry up, you’ll be late to dinner with an old friend who’s passing through town. You grab your bag and keys and quietly shut your office door behind you. The door to your right is closed, but you can see light spilling out from beneath it.
Before you walk away, you take note of the name plate: Erwin Smith, PhD
• • •
The first day of classes is a whirlwind. You barely have time to eat lunch, and you empathize with your students as you, too, struggle to locate your various assigned classrooms on a still-unfamiliar campus.
By the time you return to the English department for office hours, you feel frazzled. Carrying a lukewarm coffee in a to-go cup and an armful of student info sheets in labeled folders, you quickly round the corner — and walk straight into someone.
“Oof.” Your folders tumble to the floor, and coffee splashes onto your shirt. The only reason you don’t lose your balance completely is a large, warm hand at the small of your back, preventing gravity from wreaking even further havoc.
“Are you alright?”
When you look up, you have to remind your brain that words exist and you should use them. Because the man in front of you — who, much to your embarrassment, is holding you rather close — is very, very handsome.
Golden hair, carefully combed back. Bright blue eyes that reflect a concerned warmth. Strong features, sharp cheekbones, a smile that would make anyone melt...
“Y-yes! I’m fine!” Once you’ve found your footing, you glance down at yourself, and then notice you’re not the only one who’s now coffee-stained.
“I’m so sorry,” you say, kneeling down to collect your folders and the many papers that slipped out of them. “I need to be more careful.”
“No, no, it’s my fault,” the man assures you, squatting down to help. “And I keep a spare shirt in my office. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve spilled coffee on myself while grading papers.”
Your fingers brush against his when you both reach for the same folder, and you feel your cheeks grow warm. “Still, though, I’m really sorry.”
You both stand, and he smiles kindly. “Please don’t worry about it. Can I help you carry these? It’s the least I can do.”
You nod and walk down the narrow hallway, with him trailing close behind you. “I’m going to take a guess and say you’re the new hire,” he ventures.
“Is it that obvious?” you ask with a small laugh.
“I’ve been here for a while now, so new faces stand out. Keith said you moved here for the job?”
You’re so flustered, it takes you a moment to connect the name with the stern but friendly department chair. “Yeah. New city, new job, new everything...”
“That’s a lot to be dealing with.”
When you reach your office door and retrieve your keys from your bag, the man behind you chuckles. “So it is you. I wondered, but they haven’t put your name plate up yet.”
“Hmm?” You turn to find him grinning and pointing at the door next to yours — the office of your mystery colleague.
“This is me. Sorry, I should’ve introduced myself — Erwin Smith.” He goes to offer his hand, then realizes your arms are full. You both share an awkward laugh.
You unlock the door and gesture for him to come in. “I’m beginning to think that we both apologize too much,” you tease, dropping the folders onto your desk and tossing the now-empty cup in the trash.
“Only when I’ve thoroughly embarrassed myself and made a questionable first impression.” Erwin hands you the remaining folders and shoves his hands in his pockets.
“No, you’re fine! Really, I appreciate the help.” You offer your hand and return his smile. “Let’s try this again. I’m Y/N.”
You notice that his hand is lightly calloused as it closes around yours. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” And you can tell from the look on his face that he means it.
• • •
Over the next few weeks, you see more and more of Erwin, as you both adjust to your respective schedules and learn when they overlap. He holds office hours at the same time as you, and since it’s still early in the semester, it’s unusual for students to actually show up. More often than not, you end up in his office. It’s larger and more comfortable — “lived in” he joked the first time you saw it, telling you about the evenings he’s inadvertently fallen asleep on the small sofa, reading after a late grad class.
There are twice as many shelves as there are in yours, all of them absolutely crammed with books. You could spend hours perusing them all. Sometimes, after you’ve finished grading papers, you pick one at random and page through it.
“Where are you?” Erwin will ask, in the midst of his own grading, and you’ll read a line from whatever book you’re holding, playing a little guessing game with him. More often than not, he knows the title and author from the smallest of clues. It’s obscenely attractive.
Then again, everything about him is attractive. You often feel guilty for sneaking glances at him while he’s preoccupied, watching how his brow furrows while writing an email, noticing when he rolls up his sleeves, revealing hard, lean muscle, thinking that he has no right to look so good while wearing reading glasses. On the few occasions he’s caught your gaze, always offering a small smile, you mentally berate yourself. He’s a friend — your first real friend here. But he’s also a colleague. Keep it professional, Y/N...
You meet his friends when he invites you to join them for weekly trivia nights at their favorite bar, the Garrison. All of them teach at the university, and they’ve formed their group slowly, over years of faculty get-togethers, awards ceremonies, and one terrible team-building camping trip. Hange, who teaches chemistry, immediately adds you to their group chat, which mostly consists of them spamming everyone with memes and Levi from the history department colorfully (but also endearingly) insulting everyone.
By the time midterms come around, your office hours have become much busier. But you still make time to talk with Erwin, and you’ve even spent time together off campus, when he offered to give you a tour of his favorite museum. When you mentioned it to Hange, they nearly spilled beer all over the table, gasping, “You two finally went on a date?!” Erwin choked, coughing as Levi pounded a fist against his back, and you were positive your face was so hot, it would spontaneously combust. Neither of you mentioned it afterwards.
But that hasn’t changed the fact that you have the biggest crush on him. And you’re not sure what to do about it. His friends — now your friends, too — haven’t exactly been subtle about trying to make something happen between the two of you. But neither you nor Erwin has made a move.
This evening, you’ve both stayed late, in an attempt to catch up on paperwork. You notice him stand and walk to the old turntable in the corner, changing the record. The song that begins to play makes you lift your head from the pile of tests sitting on your crossed legs.
“It’s that song.” When Erwin looks at you, puzzled, you explain, “You were playing it, the first time I was here — before the semester began.” Your face heats up as he continues to stare at you. “Sorry, that’s weird, right? I just... didn’t know anyone else was here, and it was a nice song, and —”
He laughs, raising his hands as he approaches you. “Whoa there. It’s okay, you just surprised me. It’s a favorite of mine — ‘Stardust’ by Hoagy Carmichael. My parents used to dance to it sometimes, when they stayed up late drinking wine, thinking I was asleep.”
“Let me guess,” you say, propping your chin on your hand. “You pretended and then read books beneath the covers.”
Erwin smiles. “Guilty.” He stands there for a moment, seeming thoughtful. And then he asks, softly, “Did you think it was a date?”
You blink up at him, setting your papers aside. “Oh. I... Um... No.” You’ve grown close enough to him that you can now read the subtle shifts in his expressions, and when you see a flash of disappointment, you blurt out, “But I wanted it to be.”
“You did?”
“Yeah. I’m just... not great at things like this. Especially with a coworker. I didn’t want to make things complicated.”
Your gaze is fixed on the floor, so you don’t notice him sit beside you until the sofa cushion dips. When you turn to look at him, he smiles. “I’ve been feeling the same way. And I didn’t want you to think we’re only friends because of that — like I had an ulterior motive or something.”
He reaches for your hand but hesitates, allowing you to meet him halfway and entwine your fingers with his. There’s an almost imperceptible sigh of relief before he murmurs, “I like spending time with you. I’m sorry I’ve wasted some of it trying to figure out the best strategy, when I could’ve just... told you that.”
You squeeze his hand and smile. “That sounds an awful lot like an apology, Dr. Smith.”
Erwin chuckles. “Well, then, instead of ‘sorry,’ I’ll go with, ‘Would you like to have dinner tomorrow night?’ And to be clear, this would definitely be a date.”
“Hmm...” You glance at the clock on the wall. “It’s only eight. Is tonight too soon?” When his eyebrows inch upwards, you remind him, “You said you didn’t want to waste any more time. And if you do any more work tonight, you’ll end up doing that thing where you pinch the bridge of your nose over and over.”
He lets out a loud laugh. “Someone’s been paying attention.”
“You make it hard not to.” You stand, pulling his hand to your lips and brushing a soft kiss across his knuckles. It’s worth it, to see his blush deepen. “So... Where to?”
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