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kybee1497 · 6 months

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Fic tag game

Tagged by @dark-visitors (thanks Visi!!)

1) How many works do you have on Ao3?

2) What's your Ao3 word count?

300,411

3) What fandoms do you write for?

So so many, lol. Jatp, Wednesday, descendants, do revenge, first kill, Batman (eventually, I have plans okay I just haven’t like done it yet). I’ve also written one fic each for bridgerton and wynonna earp.

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Season of Woe (Wenclair - Wednesday)

Don’t talk to me or my scary goth gf ever again (Wenclair - Wednesday)

Bat vs. bug (calliete - first kill)

Fire in my blood (Wenclair - Wednesday)

Hate to say I told you so (Kathony - Bridgerton)

5) Do you respond to comments?

Yes? I really try to, I’m just horrifically bad at actually getting to each comment. I think overall I respond to like 50% of comments in a super nonsensical order.

6) What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ha. Hahahahaha I’ve actually been yelled at many many times for this fic and it was so so worth it

Always by your side

Also

Never saw you coming (I’ll never be the same) Aka Luke leaves

7) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh fuck idk, I love me some fluff. If we’re going purely based off of soft fluffy vibes it’s laughing at clouds so dark above, the suns in my heart (I’m ready for love) or dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat

8) Do you get hate on fics?

No thank god, I would cry for days

9) Do you write smut? What kind?

… maybe so. I’m a kink girlie what can I say.

10) Do you write cross-overs?

No? No, not yet anyways.

11) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope

12) Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Yes! I wrote a Bridgerton fic with my beloved wife Rach @itsthebooks (whomst almost divorced me last week but she did not file the paperwork so it’s all good 😂) for the bridgerton troped round last year. I am a menace and would not shut up about this fic until it was written. It was a lot of fun tho!!

Hate to say I told you so

13) What WIP you would like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Oh god most of them. The adhd hypefocus gremlin is a bitch and a half when she changes fixations. I really want to finish promise me you’ll catch me but I’ve been stalled out on the third chapter for like 2 years. I also want to finish here we go again but I’m pretty sure I wrote myself into a corner and idk how to fix it without trashing it and rewriting and I don’t have the patience for that.

14) What's your all-time favourite ship?

Again adhd hyperfocus gremlin rules my heart and mind so it depends on the day tbh. In terms of longest reigning ships it’s jukebox and bellarke. Currently I’m obsessed with all things batfam (familial/platonic obvi) and DCU

15) What are your writing strengths?

I’m really good at diving into a characters head and the way they think. One of my fave Fics, writing wise doesn’t have any dialogue or specific action, it’s more character study than anything else. It’s really easy for me to just write and be able to flow through memory’s and thoughts and feelings and how the character experiences the world. I’m sure there’s a word for it I’m just not remembering but it’s my favorite kind of writing

16) What are your writing weaknesses?

Um probably that I get really bogged down in action heavy scenes, I focus too much on where they’re bodies physically are and what movements they’re making and it takes me a billion years to write and I think I put in too much detail but I never know how to trim it down???

17) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

There’s a reason I’ve only failed 4 classes in my life and 2 were math and 2 were a foreign language. It is a struggle for me. I don’t want to have to work that hard to write and also I’m afraid of fucking it up cause google translate is not reliable. I’ll do the occasional word or term of endearment but that’s pretty much it. Usually if the characters are speaking another language I’ll mention it in story and then write the dialogue in English

18) First fandom you wrote for?

Jatp

19) Favourite fic you've ever written?

No, you can’t make me 🥺

Always by your side cause I’m so fucking proud of the pain I unleashed

As if it’s really that easy to get over you (just snap your fingers) the aforementioned fic with very little dialogue or action, just vibes and character study into drea from do revenge

20) What fic would you want to rewrite one day?

I have no idea, I’m vaguely hoping to rewrite here we go again one day but tbh I barely have the focus to fics the first time.

Tagging: @itsthebooks @a-tomb-with-a-view @wr0temyway0ut @thatbitchmabel @fandomscraziness22 @angelofarts and anyone else that wants to do it, I’m so tired and totally blanking rn

#Kyleigh writes stuff #tag games #fic tag games

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sanriosnuggless · 2 years

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What's an alternative high school I don't know if I am familar with that? 🤔

I hope this isn't intruding!

💗

ofc not! i’m happy to share, under the cute bc it’s a lot sorry🫣

an alternative highschool is a “last resort” highschool for kids that don’t “fit in” at a normal highschool. so like we had the girls that got pregnant and a kid/nursery center, we also had kids with multiple disciplinary problems as well as multiple attendance prombelms. and some people just didn’t thrive in a normal school setting. you had to be invited by the alt school or suggested by your current school you already go to. i was suggested to go bc of my attendance in normal school and inability to apply myself fully for homeschool (adhd 🫶🏻) so i went for both my mental health and attendance issues (which was a result of my mental illness, so🫣🫣). anyway i was heavily bullied in normal schools (twas a goth and they would growl/scream at me in the hallways) and it made my social anxiety very very bad. i couldn’t even go to that school or drive by it without having a panic attack. my alt school specifically only took juniors and seniors (which was great for me bc i was always bullied by the younger kids). it’s honestly amazing and gets a bad reputation bc they’re are some “bad” kids there (they weren’t bad just needed extra help). anyway, the teachers and staff are amazing, like they’re so fricken helpful dude. i absolutely loved all my teachers there, i could talk abt them individually, but i’ll save you the essay 😭 - like they actually could teach you smth, in so many ways, not just read the one way out of a book. math was never smth i was good at or understood, but my math teacher there actually showed us multiple ways to solve problems and i was like “😳? you can 😳do that??”and they all were like that. they were able to be helpful bc there was like 9 kids in each class so it’s much more hands on and intimate. very small school, helps a lot with anxiety, and there’s no bullying. most ppl are 16+ and know this school is their last option before just dropping out and getting a GED, or if your there bc of behavior - you’d be sent to the local “juvie school” - that was ex addicts and assaulters. so ppl behaved for the most part. anyway - you get a teacher buddy your senior year to help you keep track of your credits and missing assignments. you’re even allowed to work at your own speed, a lot of people graduate early from there. basically, they’re only reason i graduated :D and tbh i think eddie would thrive in smth like that, he def has undiagnosed adhd and they’re so helpful with that kinda thing!

*also forgot to add bc big dumb since it’s like, so small and your just there to graduate, there’s no prom or grad/senior night or anything. we had senior photos and a grad ceremony but none of the recreational stuff. no sports (thank god) so no rallies or games. buttttt smth fun, we got like three breaks?? bc they don’t want to burn us out. so we had first period - breakfast- second and third period- small break - fourth - lunch -6th - home! it made school so much easier for someone who’s easily overwhelmed and takes time to process info🫶🏻

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sirdiabolical · 3 years

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Kakashi’s timeline doesn’t make sense but I need it to for my fics

I’ve decided I’m going to formally figure out and write down Kakashi’s early life timeline so I can stick to a cohesive script when writing his childhood, specifically what age he is in relation to others. Once I have it all figured out and sorted neatly, I’ll post the final version onto my main.

Important Note: I do not have all the facts and these are my live workings out. Maths is not my strong suit and I am liable to get things wrong.

Here’s the foundation of my workings out.

Kakashi Canon: Genin at 5, Chunin at 6, Jounin at 9, ANBU at 12(?)*

Obito Canon: Genin at 9, Chunin at 11

Rin Canon: Genin at 9, Chunin at 11

Minato Canon: Genin at 10, Dead at 24

*I don’t have hard evidence of this, it’s just what people say.

The anime tends to portray Kakashi, Rin and Obito as the same age, yet I believe they supposedly competed in the chunin exams together? And if Kakashi did graduate before them, did he have a previous team?

I’ve seen fics tackle this in multiple ways. But before I tackle it myself, I’m going to establish a baseline. Assuming that Kakashi, Rin and Obito all graduated at the same time, we have: A four year age gap between Kakashi and the other two genin, and a ten year age gap between Kakashi and Minato (the latter which I think generally works).

Which leads us to Timeline A:

Genin Kakashi: 5, Genin Rin: 9, Genin Obito: 9, Sensei Minato: 15/16 (I haven’t accounted for birthdays and their placements in the year)

Chunin Kakashi: 6, Genin Rin: 10, Genin Obito: 10, Sensei Minato 16/17

Chunin Kakashi: 7, Chunin Rin: 11, Chunin Obito: 11, Sensei Minato 17/18

But Wait…

Didn’t they compete in the exams together? If we follow that rule, then Kakashi has to graduate a year later than Rin and Obito.

This would give us Timeline B:

Academy/pre-academy* Kakashi: 4, Genin Rin: 9, Genin Obito: 9, ??? Minato: 14/15

Genin Kakashi: 5, Genin Rin: 10, Genin Obito: 10, Sensei Minato: 15/16

Chunin Kakashi: 6, Chunin Rin: 11, Chunin Obito: 11, Sensei Minato: 16/17

*We don’t know how old Kakashi was when he entered the academy

???

We know Minato graduated at 10, but I don’t know much else. If he developed at the same rate as his students, that would put him at Chunin around 12 or so. He’d have to be a jounin to teach so perhaps he became one at 15/16 and was immediately given a team due to a war time and any other justifying head canons.

So we have two main options: Rin and Obito were in a different genin team for a year, or Minato took on Rin and Obito without Kakashi (and perhaps with a third irrelevant member) for a year before Kakashi.

That would bring the age gap between Kakashi and his two peers up to five years.

I don’t like the idea of a ten year old Rin infatuated with a five year old Kakashi as it doesn’t make sense, even as far as ten year olds having romantic feelings go. So to maintain this timeline, I’d need to head canon that Rin had a more of a ‘wow look at this little guy, such a cute baby ninja’ with possible sibling esc tones that frustrate Obito not because he sees Kakashi as a rival for Rin’s love, but more generally Rin’s attention.

HOWEVER! I have not, and likely will not, watch the part of the anime where they compete in the chunin exams and cannot confirm how they went (I’m too tired to look it up right now) and our first time line could maintain its integrity easily by having Kakashi graduate the first time around while the other two have to have another go. However, they would be without Kakashi and the exams seem to work with teams of three somewhat exclusively, so decisions would have to be made there.

———

I’m going to leave my workings out here for now, but so far we have:

Timeline A: Straight Canon, No Context

Timeline B: We All Ace the Chunin Exams

More timelines to come, such as ‘Actually, we’re all the same age (title subject to change)’.

#naruto #kakashi hatake #naruto meta #minato namikaze #rin nohara #obito uchiha

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softwarmboy · 3 years

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1. Selfie

2. What would you name your future kids?

I really like the name Damon! And Grace

3. Do you miss anyone?

Always

4. What are you looking forward to?

My name and gender marker documents going through!!! (Hopefully) my trip to London in the fall!!! My second dose of the vaccine! Seeing my little sister again! New tattoos!!

5. Is there anyone who can always make you smile?

Absolutely, I have a few close friends who can always get me smiling again

6. Is it hard for you to get over someone?

Unfortunately for me, yes, very ;-; Im a very emotional person and feel things very strongly

7. What was your life like last year?

Living on the coast, working construction, and that was about it

8. Have you ever cried because you were so annoyed

Yes 😂😂😂 mostly over math

9. Who did you last see in person

My friend Shannon!!!

10. Are you good at hiding your feelings

Yes and no, if I’m upset/irritated/sad it’ll show on my face whether I want it to or not, BUT I’m pretty good as passing it off as something else if I want. Not a whole lot of people can tell when im doing that, if anyone at all

11. Are you listening to music right now?

Of course!! Im listening to When The Darkness Comes by Colbie Caillat

12. What is something you want right now?

Food 😂😂😂

13. How do you feel right now?

Sore and tired

14. When was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you

Yesterday!! My friend was having a rough day and was kinda snarky with me and gave me a hug and an apology after she calmed down

15. Personality description

Full of dad jokes, puns, sass, caffeine and smart ass replies at all times 😂 very direct/straightforward, and have little to no patience for beating around the bush, in any context

16. Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t

Oh god yeah, growing up I never told anyone anything, ever

17. Opinion on insecurities

We all have them, if you’re the kinda person who zeroes in on someone else’s, for any reason, I feel sorry for you but also have absolutely no patience or respect for you

18. Do you miss how things were a year ago?

Nooooooooo, I wasn’t very happy. I wasn’t unhappy necessarily but 🤷🏻‍♂️ still no, hard pass

19. Have you ever been to New York

Nope! It’s on my travel list tho

20. What is your favourite song at the moment

At the moment??? The Colbie Caillat song i mentioned above!

21. Age and birthday?

23, and December 16th!

22. Description of crush

No thanks 😂

23. Fear(s)

Oh man, spiders, wasps, escalators (I have no idea why, don’t ask 😂😂) and aggressive men

24. Height

5’9!

25. Role model

As cliche as it is, I mean it when I say my momma

26. Idol(s)

I don’t really??? Have any????

27. Things I hate

Mushrooms and olives 😂 but in all seriousness, people who are rude to retail/customer service employees or servers, people who don’t use turn signals or say please, thank you and excuse me, the sound of styrofoam (it’s a sensory thing for me)

28. I’ll love you if-

You’ll play video games with me or will try them or any books/music I suggest, notice the little things about me

29. Favourite film(s)

The Mortal Instruments!!!!

30. Favourite tv show(s)

Gilmore Girls, The Vampire Diaries, Supernatural, Lucifer, Stranger Things, The Witcher, Firefly

31. 3 random facts

Your feet are the same length as your forearm! A whale dick is called a dork (if I remember correctly) and I can’t think of a third

32. Are your friends mainly guys or girls?

Girls mostly! I don’t have much in common with many guys 🤷🏻‍♂️ that and I just feel more comfortable around girls

33. Something you want to learn?

Sword fighting!!!! That’d be so cool

34. Most embarrassing moment

I have so many 😂😂😂 I’m a clumsy bastard, but I’ll go with my most recent for now- I saw a cute dog hanging his head out a car window and said hi without realizing there was someone in the passenger seat with their window down 😂😂

35. Favourite subject

Anything compute related!!

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill

Go to Italy, get married, see the northern lights!!!

37. Favourite actor/actress

Melissa McCarthy 😂😂

38. Favourite comedian(s)

John Mulaney, Taylor Tomlinson, Gabriel Iglesias, and Iliza Shlesinger!!

39. Favourite sport(s)

Hockey I guess 🤷🏻‍♂️

40. Favourite memory

Just one??? Hmmmmm….singing Party In The USA with my friends after we’d been inhaling helium 😂

41. Relationship status

Single 😂😂😭

42. Favourite book(s)

The Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare, The Inheritance Cycle by Christopher Paolini, The Selection by Kiera Cass, and the Nightshade trilogy by Andrea Cremer

43. Favourite song ever

Ever???? Oh man that’s a tough one, maybe Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day???

44. Age you get mistaken for

17/18 😂😂😂so many of the teenagers at work don’t believe me when I say I’m in my 20’s. One of the kids in produce absolutely refused to believe I’m older than him

45. How you found out about your idol

N/A

46. What my last text message says

“I know you are”

47. Turn ons

Light nail scratches, is really all I can think of lately 🤷🏻‍♂️ I haven’t had that conversation with someone in quite some time

48. Turn offs

Being non consensually bossy, treating me like an object, daddy/mommy kinks

49. Where I want to be right now

London maybe! I’m really excited to go

50. Favourite picture of your idol

N/A

51. Starsign

Sagittarius!

52. Something I’m talented at

Teaching myself instruments! I’ve taught myself 3 so far! It’s always been something I’ve been able to pick up really quickly

53. 5 things that make me happy

Music, love in any form, snuggles, drives with my favourite people, my favourite comfort foods

54. Something that’s worrying me at the moment

My name and gender marker documents

55. Tumblr friends

God I don’t remember anyone’s URL’s anymore 😂😂 but I have a fair amount! I talk to 99% of them on other platforms now so 🤷🏻‍♂️

56. Favourite food(s)

Nachos, mashed potatoes, any sort of cheesy/creamy pasta! Grilled cheese, grilled salmon roll, and really any form of potatoes actually

57. Favourite animal(s)

Wolves are my absolute favourite

58. Description of my best friend

Curly brown (it looks brown to me 😂 I know you’ll come at me for this when you see it) hair, blue eyes, the gayest fashion sense, practical, will always tell me when I need to pull my head outta my ass 😂💚

59. Why I joined Tumblr

I wanted a safe space to explore things like mental health, transitioning and a few other things!

60. Ask me anything you want

Self explanatory, have at ‘er

#personal #it me #jaces life #as requested!

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lokisgame · 5 years

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A Generous Donation [16]

[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] [part 6] [part 7] [part 8] [part 9] [part 10] [part 11] [part 12][part 13] [part 14] [part 15]

She pulled his mouth to hers and it was as if they were kissing for the first time. Mulder pushed the album gently aside and puled her into his lap, feeling the warm, trembling silk under his palms. They didn't rush. Holding tight and slowly claiming his mouth, she grounded his heart. These kisses could last a lifetime, if only he had time to breathe. "You wanna go to bed?" She asked, never letting go of his shoulders. "I don't think I can sleep," he said and they both laughed, relaxing into each other. He ran his hands over her back, feeling the silk slip under his palms. "Where did you get this robe?" Looking up, she met his smiling eyes. "I tell you, you have a son and you ask about my sleepwear?" "I guess I am."

"It was a gift," she explained, "from Will and Emily." "Wow, that's not something a son would buy for his mom." "But definitely something a grown-up niece would buy for her single aunt." That made him laugh. "She spent some time in Japan, and Will went to visit." "Japan? Impressive." "That's Missy in Emily, once she tasted independence, she could never stay long in one place. Will brought this back, saying he and Em picked it out for me, when they visited Kyoto. You like it?" She spread her arms, letting the sleeves fan out and he saw white cranes flying across midnight sky. "It's amazing." "You can borrow it sometime," she teased, watching as his expression changed to somber again. "Does Will know?" Mulder asked and she lowered her gaze, drawing reassurance from his embrace. "He does about the IVF." She said, swallowing the memory. "When he turned sixteen he became obsessed with this idea that his father abandoned him. So I told him the truth." "How did he take it?" "Pretty good, considering age and his rebellious streak." "Meaning?" "He didn't talk to me for a week." "I'm sorry." "He thought he was a vanity project." "What did you do?" "Charlie talked to him, and we never spoke of it again." "You know what he said?" She shook her head, pulling herself closer. "Right now I'm just happy you're still talking to me." "Don't worry," he sighed, hugging her tightly, "I'm not going anywhere." "What about bed?" He laughed and kissed her neck. "Okay, fine, let's go to bed."

With her arm around his chest and her thigh draped over his leg, it was easy to believe, that this could be the first night of the rest of his life. Warm breath washed over his neck, filling his head with a mixture of shampoo, body lotion and something unidentifiably feminine, bringing up images of homemade cookies and clouds of perfume in the morning. This tiny weight draped over his side, once carried a life inside her. They grew together, winning, failing, learning. Now where did he fit into that story? Certainly not in the main credits. A supporting role, somewhere in the third act, maybe, Will's Father. Even if they shared genes, he couldn't claim the title with a clear conscience. He wasn't there for his first fever, first step, first bike rides and fist scraped knees. The thought humbled him and put fear in his heart. What if Will still believed his father abandoned him? What if now, he would refuse to accept him? What if this new knowledge, once more turned him against his mother? And what did Mulder actually know about the role of an adult male in a young man's life? His own father abandoned him, he could at least relate to that. Could he be the father, his father never was? Scully stirred beside him, drawing herself closer, fingertips flexing on his chest. "I can feel you thinking," she mumbled. "Shhh, go back to sleep." But she was already shifting, lips grazing skin and climbing onto his chest. Face to face in the faint glow of waning moon, he felt fingers comb through his hair. "It'll be okay," she whispered, honouring the midnight hush. Mulder sighed, running his hands over her thighs and back. "I'm sorry, I just have trouble processing it all." Beyond words, she let her head drop, and he held on. "Where do I fit in, Scully?" "Here," she replied softly, wrapping her arms around him. "Right here."

Scully woke up late, in an empty bed. "Oh no," she groaned and rolled over, burying her face in his pillow, "it was too good to be true." She breathed in the last of his scent, cold but still there. If she could have it bottled, just to have something to remember him by. "Hey, I still need that." She heard his voice and looked up, but blinded by her own hair, all she got was a soft thump and a laugh, when she tried to blow the tresses away from her eyes. "You still there?" He chuckled, parting the strands and taking her face in his hands. "There you are, good morning." "I thought you left." She said, before giving back the small kiss that was quickly becoming the best part of her morning. "Ye of little faith," he grinned and kissed her again. Scully sat up, giving back the pillow in exchange for a steaming cup of coffee. The pillow landed against the headboard, followed by Mulder, then her back, resting against his side and finally his arm around her waist. Settled, they both sighed. "Thanks for telling me," Mulder said, pressing a kiss to her skin before resting his chin on her shoulder. "When do you want to tell Will?" "I don't know," she said taking a sip, "he's so fragile right now." "But he's a grown-up too," Mulder said gently, "he has the right to know." "It's been ten days since transplant," she sighed, "I don't want stress to ruin his recovery." "Will he suspect something, if I visit more?" "Maybe, but he adores you, so we might get away with it, for a while at least." "Who else knows?" "Charlie," she said, sheepishly. Mulder chuckled. "That explains things." "And I guess Emily." "That's why she called me Uncle Mulder." "I don't know if Charlie told her or she figured it out on her own, it's like she has a sixth sense or something. I'll talk to her before I set out to kill my baby brother." "It's your mother I was worried about." "Oh, there's no need," Scully laughed, "you saved her favourite grandson, you could eat fried kittens for breakfast and she'd still love you." "Kittens?" "Or puppies." "I'm going vegan." "No you're not." She laughed and turned, setting her mug on the nightstand and draping one, slender, bare leg over his lap. The short, silk nightshirt rode up, and she saw his eyes follow the tantalizing lines. "You're right, I'm not," he teased, his tone turning smoky as he pushed her to lean back, "just don't tell your mom what I really like for breakfast."

"Hey kid." Mulder said when Will woke up. "Hi, where's mom?" "They called her in to some ER emergency." "Oh, right, it happens sometimes." "So, what's with the face wear." "You guys wear something all the time, I got jealous." "Don't joke." "They say my saturation is a little low," Will said, fixing the tube under his nose, "I told them, I could use some fresh air, but they insisted on this canned stuff." "Not a fan of the can?" Will laughed and rubbed his nose. "It tickles." "Leave it, try not to think about it." "There's not much to think about left." "What did you think about?" "You know, the usual, school, girls, grades." "Girls." "There's this nurse who usually comes for nightshifts." "And?" "I think she likes me." "You're a likeable kid." "No, I mean, she doesn't call me honey or darling, like the other mother hens around here." "What does she call you." "Will, just Will, and she doesn't treat me like a needle cushion. Very gentle, nice hands too, from what I could tell through the latex." "What else?" "What do you mean?" "You said you thought about FBI, investigative work. Even the smallest detail can be crucial to solving a case, so, pay attention. Practice on something that's easy on the eye before you have to deal with the gruesome stuff." "What did you see?" "You don't wanna know, and I don't feel like remembering." "That bad?" "If it didn't affect me so much, I would probably be an FBI agent, myself." "Agent Mulder," Will said, testing the words, "it has a nice ring to it." Mulder laughed. "It does, doesn't it."

"Dinner's in the oven." Scully said, plopping down on the couch, then promptly falling over. She pulled one of the throw pillows under her head and set the egg timer on the floor, making the little bells inside chime quietly. "Okay, but I repeat, you should have let me help, I'm surprisingly apt in the kitchen." "I'm sure you are, but this is my way of winding down. I tend to take out my frustrations on the chopping board and I wouldn't want you to get into crossfire." "That dangerous, huh?" "Fair warning." "I'll try to remember that, want a blanket?" "No, I'm good, ignore me, I'm just gonna doze for a bit." "Okay." Comfortable silence fell between them. Mulder worked at his desk, Scully relaxed on the couch, timer ticked off minutes going by. "What do you want for Christmas?" She asked suddenly, when he was sure she had fallen asleep. "What?" "Christmas, gifts." "I'm half Jewish." "And the other half?" She murmured, keeping her eyes closed. "Atheist and I think it's always been the bigger half, because it always wins." "There's no such thing as bigger and smaller halves," she said, smiling, "a half is a half." "Nobody likes a math geek, Scully." "Nobody likes a party pooper either, so what do you want for Hanukkah, Mulder." "You won't let this go, are you." "No," she replied, grinning, still with her eyes closed. "Then I'll let you know." "Okay, just don't take too long." She said and went back to playing possum.

"Professor Mulder!" Mulder heard someone call and, surprised by the audacity, turned around then laughed. "Charlie!" The younger man grinned and stopped his bike a foot from where he paused. "I had you," he said as they shook hands. "No you didn't." Mulder chuckled, "I thought we were meeting downtown." "Sadly, I don't have that much time, but I was in the neighbourhood, so I figured I'll catch you here. Traffic is awful." "And it's just the beginning of Christmas rush." "You're a psychologist, so you gotta have some reasonable, scientific explanation." "Nope, beats me, and I don't even participate." "Right. Is there somewhere we can sit down around here?" "Sure, you wanna eat? There's a good Thai place down the block." "Lead the way." Charlie got off the bike and they picked up a steady pace. "I wanted to give you a heads up," Mulder said after a moment, "Scully is coming for you." "She usually does," Charlie laughed, "what is it this time?" "You telling Emily about the test results." "Oh," Charlie looked up, surprised, "oh! She told you!" "Yeah," Mulder smiled, slipping hands into the pockets of his coat and Charlie put his arm around his shoulders. "Thank you for what you did," he said with complete sincerity, "Will is a great kid." "In large part thanks to you, I imagine." "No, thanks to Dana, she did an amazing job raising him. And just when she was about to lose him, she found you, exactly when she needed you the most. I'll be forever grateful for that. Still," his tone changed, if only a little, "if you hurt her, I'll be there to make you pay for it." Mulder glanced up and saw the grin, back in full swing. "What? She is my sister." "I'll remember that." "I'm sure you will." Charlie laughed, good-naturedly slapping Mulder's back before letting go. "So, is that what you wanted to talk to me about?" "No," Mulder chuckled, "actually, it's about Christmas." "What about it?" "What kind of gifts does she like?"

#generous donation #au #x files fanfic #msr fanfic #sweet nothings

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thuskindlyshescatters · 4 years

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Team RWBY and the Very Long Day

Or maybe... not as long as you’d expect?

When the team reaches Atlas Academy and are brought on a tour, they’re dead tired. Now, as someone who’s gone on a number of college tours myself, I totally can relate. And plus, the team has had a really long day -- Volume 6 Chapter 10 through Volume 7 Chapter 2 have all been the same day.

However, it feels a lot longer for us than it should, since we saw it over a nine-month period, and they only experienced it in a day. But how long was that day specifically?

There’s a couple factors we need to consider: time zones, hour of sunset, flight hours, and actual in-show events. By evaluating this, we will determine: How long of a day were the past 6 chapters of RWBY? Is their exhaustion justified by canon events?

Spoilers, math, and lots of pointless reading below.

I) Time Zone

According to this map (the fifth image) from the second “World of Remnant” short, we get a pretty good approximation of the location of Atlas. Argus is on the U-shaped peninsula a third of the way from Mistral to Atlas. Ideally, time zones would work in 24 hour-wide increments, so assuming there is NOT a huge Pacific-like ocean around Remnant’s back half, there is approximately a two-hour time difference between Argus and Atlas. This means the sun sets on Argus earlier than Atlas -- however, Atlas is further North, so sunset may be earlier for them relative to someone at a lower latitude in their timezone. Additionally, it also means the team may experience around two hours of jet lag upon arrival.

II) Sunset

When the gang arrives in Atlas, it is night time. In Volume 6 Chapter 7, they arrive at Argus in mid-afternoon. Because the next episode’s scenes with Cordovin at the base and Maria in the garden do not have the same warm lighting, we can infer that those took place the next day, sometime during the middle of the day. They receive news that Oscar is missing and begin their search -- however, unless they were searching for him like in Volume 1 Chapter 16 (if you recall, that was 12 hours), it’s likely they were out of the house for no more than 4 hours. From the end of Volume 6 Chapter 8 to the end of Volume 6 Chapter 9 might have been from, call it, 1:00 PM to 5:00 PM -- meaning sunset was sometime within those hours. It is wintertime in the Northern hemisphere of Remnant (quick summary, it’s been about a year since the end of Volume 3 Chapter 12), so assuming they don’t have daylight savings time, this is a pretty reasonable estimate for when the sun would set in a city whose latitude is comparable to that of Paris. If we take a quick look back at Atlas, it is MUCH farther North than Argus, and is pretty much in the Arctic. If we compare map distances, Atlas might as well be in Iceland, as Paris and Reykjavik are 1,396 air miles away from each other. In December in Iceland, the sun sets at around 3:00 to 4:00 PM. Therefore, it is perfectly reasonable that people would still be up and about when it appears to be night time in Atlas.

III) Flight Hours

What this means is that the team, in order to leave Argus during daytime (earlier than 5:30 PM) and to arrive in Atlas during nighttime (later than 4:00 PM) when there is a two-hour time difference between them, it works out to assume that the minimum time a flight on an Atlesian dropship would take from Argus to Atlas would be 4 hours. Even more generous would be to allow them 5 hours, considering the pace of the vehicle.

IV) Events

I’d like to start with the evidence we see in Atlas and work backwards to make a fair assumption about when they arrive in Atlas. The amount of people on the streets and the fact that Dr. Polendina’s pharmacy is open makes me want to believe it’s before 6:00 PM. The Faunus miners we see on the passing vehicle makes me wonder if this is accurate, however, because I would assume the miners would work more unreasonable hours than that. I will chalk this up to be a case of world details being more important to show punctually than consistently. Anyways, if we say it’s 5:30 PM in Atlas when they arrive, then it’s likely 3:30 PM in Argus when they depart (accounting for a 4 hour flight and 2 hour time zone difference.)

Now, for the real numbers:

Ruby’s role in the heist takes place more or less in real time, while Blake and Yang’s excursion with Adam is punctuated by breaks of which we cannot know the duration. Therefore, knowing that Blake and Yang rejoin the group in Volume 6 Chapter 13, I will only recount the “cliff-side” events, as it were, to calculate the duration of the heist itself.

Volume 6 Chapter 10

We have no idea when the heist begins. Cordovin, being a military officer, would probably want Weiss to arrive at a sharp hour, so let’s call that hour “X:00″ o’clock. Based off of our previous calculations, the end of the heist must occur at around 3:30, so depending on their length, this hour could be 3:00 PM. (Spoiler: it totally will be.)

The episode begins on the Rooster Teeth website at 2:08 minutes, and from there it pretty much goes in real time until 4:50, which is the moment when Weiss loses scroll signal with Ruby. Ruby loses signal with Weiss at 6:02, so we can deduce that those next 1:12 minutes of Ruby’s timeline are occurring simultaneously with what we see of Weiss. From the beginning of the heist to when Ruby loses signal is 2:42 minutes in real time (how efficient of Weiss!). From 6:02 to 11:02 is the next realtime sequence, at which point we cut to Blake and Adam, but again, we’ll be ignoring them for now. Now, the heist has been in progress for 7:42 minutes; it is X:07.

Volume 6 Chapter 11

The episode officially begins at 2:08 again. The first scene of them talking lasts until 4:01, when it cuts away from them planning to attack. Let’s be generous and give them 30 unspoken seconds where some offscreen planning occurs, making that first sequence about 2:37 minutes. Then, the sequence continues from 4:01 to 9:44 (no, I’m not counting slow motion because that’s dumb). Then, we cut away again. This episode’s total real-time stacks up to 8:20 minutes. Therefore, the heist has now been occurring for 16:02 minutes, so it’s about X:16 o’clock.

Volume 6 Chapter 12

This episode actually starts at 1:57 -- wow, wild. It runs continuously to 7:25 (no, cutting back and forth between dialogue doesn’t fucking count), making this section 5:28 minutes. We cut away to Bees, but we return to Cordovin at 11:42, pretty much exactly where it left off, and that carries on to the end of the episode at 12:54. The total of the episode comes out to be 6:40 minutes, since the Bees got a lot of murder screentime. We are also now 22:42 minutes into the heist, and it is X:22 o’clock.

Volume 6 Chapter 13

Cinder and Neo take up the first few minutes of screentime, so the episode starts for our main heroes at 3:33. It kind of carries over from the previous episode, but there’s enough fighters in the air that I’ll give them 90 seconds of cushion time to compensate for realism. I will also add 30 seconds between when Weiss says they destroyed the mech to when they’re all in the airship taking flight at 4:21. Since they like skipping time so much for dramatic effect, I’ll add ANOTHER 30 seconds between when Ruby realizes she has to face it alone and they hatch their second plan at 8:39. I’m going to stop the clock at 9:55 because Ruby yells for Jinn and stops time in-universe until her Silver Eyes moment at 11:16, which, while awesome, is the first event that occurs once time speeds back up to normal. So that whole first section, including padding, was 8:52 minutes. Then, from Silver Eyes to the end of this time section when they time skip to their arrival at 13:14 is 1:58. Finally, the episode cuts to credits at 16:51, the last line being “welcome home,” making the total for the episode 14:27.

I’d like to note that the episode was 10:50 minutes before they timeskipped to their arrival, so it was 33:32 minutes into the heist and X:33 when they left for Atlas. We said earlier it would be best if they left at around 3:30 PM, and what do you know: the number works out! We can therefore pretty confidently say the heist began at 3:00 PM, which will be important later.

Volume 7 Chapter 1

That’s right folks, we’re not done! Now in Atlas, it is 5:33 PM, just like we predicted it would be. The line “welcome home” is said at 0:38, where I’ll be starting the clock for this episode, but I’ll add the 3:37 of dialogue that occurred the previous episode. They cut away to some pretty Atlas shots while they descend into the city, so I’ll provide 60 seconds of offscreen time. From there, we stay in real time until they put the ship down, which I’ll again provide another 60 seconds for. After their encounter with the MAGA (Make Atlas Great Again, obvs) hecklers, let’s say they walk for another 60 seconds before reaching Piedro’s pharmacy. Continuing to the end of the episode, it’s pretty continuous, except for the extra 90 seconds I’ll provide for them being loaded into the airship. The realtime total for this episode is 18:24 minutes, so it’s been 4 hours and 51:56 minutes since they began the heist, and it’s now 5:51 PM in Atlas.

Volume 7 Chapter 2

The episode starts at 1:46. Let’s be generous and say they’ve been in the air for 2 minutes so far. The episode plays out pretty much in real time until 15:18 where we enter Penny’s montage, so I’ll add about 3 more minutes of travel time to and from Ironwood’s office within Atlas Academy and account the Ironqrow moment for the time it took offscreen for the rest of the group to start Penny’s tour. Then, because I’ve been on many a college tour myself, I expect they’ll be walking for about 10 minutes before they start to feel like they need to collapse. So, in total, this episode takes 29:02 minutes of real time, bringing the amount of time since the start of the heist to 5 hours and 20:58 minutes, making it now approximately 6:21 PM.

In that time, various members of the team have singlehandedly overwhelmed two Argus soldiers, taken control of an airship, fought brutally with their archnemesis, battled a giant mech, flown into the barrel of a cannon, murdered a man, entered a maelstrom of Grimm, obliterated a behemoth of a Final Boss, taken a 4 hour flight, fought an onslaught of new Grimm, reunited with former besties, sisters, and colleagues alike, been arrested, and worst of all gone on a college campus tour.

V) Conclusions

I don’t think the team is suffering from that much jetlag, but I’d definitely be exhausted with that much happening even if it was only 8:21 PM in “my time.” (International travel takes a lot out of you, man.) Additionally, they probably got up earlier in the day (maybe around 9:00 AM, Argus time, if it was a lazy morning), so at this point, they’ve been awake for 11 hours, assuming no one took a nap on the airship.

However, I was surprised to find that even though all 6 of these episodes happened in one day, the actual heist part took only 33 minutes, and their first day in Atlas was about 47 minutes, maybe actually longer. That means that a LOT of the bullshit I listed above was packed into 33 minutes, and the remaining time stretched out over a leisurely hour or so. This post also was made on 11/09, so it might even happen that the next episode CONTINUES this exhausting day, in which case, expect an update.

TLDR: In conclusion, the team deserves to be tired AF because of all the crazy stuff that’s happened to them today. However, they were not awake for an exceptionally long time, nor did the events in Argus actually take up much of their day, much to my surprise.

What was the point of this again?

#rwby #rwby7 #rwby spoilers #this was fun :D #why did I do it tho :DDDD #I could have been posting about something people actually cared about :DDDDDDD #8DDDDDDDDD

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demon-animatronic · 4 years

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Perfectly Perfect: Chapter 1 (Self-Insert fic)

Title: Perfectly Perfect

Rating: Teen for swearing(That didn’t take long but it’s not a lot)

Relationship: Steelbeak x Self Insert Lexi

Genre: Family/Friendship and eventually Angst and Hurt/Comfort

Chapter Summary: Steelbeak is here and we chat about teachers that sucked when we were kids.

Other: Nothing that I can think of.

Author’s Note:

Just a quick chapter. I’m trying to think of filler related things before the angst and pain starts in a couple of chapters. Which I’m going to try and make be chapter 10 when it happens.

I will forever headcanon that OG Steelbeak is New Steelbeak’s dad. But instead of working with FOWL, he was some Crime/Mob boss and it’s how he lost his beak. Which is ironic that both lost their beaks for one reason or another.

Prologue - Last Chapter - Next Chapter

It was an average Spring day in April 2019 when Black Heron sent Steelbeak to the library to grab a few things. Apparently there was some books there that FOWL needed. So she decided to send her errand boy to go get them for her.

Steelbeak stepped inside and groaned to himself. He was never really into reading when he was younger. Well, except for Darkwing Duck comics. He read those all the time. Much to his teacher’s dislike.

He looked at the list he was given and began looking for them.

As he walked by a table, he thought he saw that Dewey kid at a different table only in red this time. But he didn’t get the chance to think about it for very long when a noise distracted him.

Looking down, he saw someone had smacked themselves in the face with a notebook. Chuckling, he walked over so he was leaning on the chair next to them.

“Bad day, babe?” Steelbeak asked.

“You can say that.” I replied with my pointed ear pinned down and not looking up from my notebook.

“What are you doing?” Steelbeak decided to ask.

“I forgot how much homework sucked.” I put the notebook down and my ear lifted up again.

“You look a little old for homework.” Steelbeak stated the obvious.

“Let’s just say I went to college, quit after a year or so to help raise my nephews, and finally started going back recently.” I said.

“Ooooh!” Steelbeak started. “I got ya.”

“I also forgot how teachers can be dicks for no reason.” I added.

“Oh don’t get me started. I hated just about every teacher that I had as a kid. Then again, it probably didn’t help how often I fought with my teachers and the other kids.” He gave a small quiet chuckle. “I lost track on how many schools I was kicked out of for fighting.”

“Wow.” I stated.

“I know!” Steelbeak said and kneeled down a little. “Wanna hear a story about one of my worst teachers that I had?”

“Sure.” I nodded.

“So I was maybe 9 or 10 years old, right? I did awful in things like Math and Science and had this woman as my teacher for both one year. I think those two classes were back-to-back even.” Steelbeak started. “For some reason she refused to give me help in those classes. And was constantly calling me out in front of the whole class. Hell, the other kids started calling me names like ‘stupid’ and she did nothing about it since she called me it herself too and even started it.”

“Please say she got fired.” I said.

“Nope. Never got fired for it. I got kicked out for fighting her one too many times though.“ Steelbeak continued. “Another thing that happened was that some kid was crying for getting a B and this same teacher told her to be happy she wasn’t like me and getting Ds and Fs! It wasn’t the only time she mentioned my grades out loud.”

“I probably would’ve fought her too for being a mega bitch.” I replied.

“Really?”

“Nah.” I smiled. “I didn’t get into fights like that. But it definitely would’ve pissed me off if I had a teacher go THAT far. Now I’m glad my kids are home schooled now.”

“Did you have teachers get on your nerves like that?” Steelbeak asked.

“Yeah I did. I remember in 4th and 5th grades, I had this teacher bitch at me nearly every day. When I found out she was my home room teacher for 5th grade, I dreaded that school year before it started. Only upside is that my class had two desks side-by-side for our books.” I replied.

“What did she bitch at you for?” Steelbeak asked, sitting down beside me.

“I went to a private school and had to wear skirts along with pants. She kept yelling at me about my skirts being too short despite classmates and kids both younger and older having even shorter skirts than me. Plus, I was constantly growing during those two years and had gotten new skirts in 4th grade. Let’s just say those things are expensive as Hell. Even back then.”

“Did any other teachers give you trouble about it?”

“Nope.” I shook my head. “That’s why I never did anything about it. She was the only one to give me problems so I chose not to get new skirts to make her happy. If other teachers and the principal said something, maybe I would’ve done something different.”

“Good for you. Honestly, I probably would’ve picked fights with her every day like my own teachers.” Steelbeak shrugged. “That said, I don’t even remember many from high school. In fact, I actually dropped out completely when I was 16 years old and left home.”

“How did your parents feel?” I asked.

“My folks didn’t like it. But then again, my dad’s an asshole and I never did anything right in his eyes. My mom, eh….she wasn’t much better.”

“That really sucks.” I replied, not knowing how to take in that info.

“Don’t worry about it. It was years ago. I haven’t seen my parents in a long time but I did turn into my dad a little bit.” He tapped his beak. “Never told me what happened to his original beak before he got a prosthetic but I doubt he did the same thing that I did to mine. Personally, I‘m pretty sure he was some crime boss. You‘re lucky you got two families.”

“How do you know?” I questioned, humorously.

“Well, you’re a Dognose. So obviously you have a Dognose family. And I’ve seen you with McDuck’s family all the time. Are you like some bonus family member or something?” Steelbeak asked.

“Yeah. I guess you can say I’m an honorary family member since I grew up with his niece and nephews. He took to calling me his niece one day and he‘s been my Uncle Scrooge ever since.” I said.

“See? You got two families. You make stuff like that look easy. I mean, I did have friends growing up that liked things like Darkwing Duck. But it didn‘t last in high school.” Steelbeak rubbed his face.

“Trust me, I always had social anxiety growing up and was lucky to meet Donald and Della. I’m pretty sure Donald and I only became best friends because we both have speech impediments. So we knew how the other was feeling with our shared insecurity and bonded from that. Della was a bonus best friend that happened to be a girl too.”

“So would you have been able to make friends or gain a second family without them?” Steelbeak asked.

“Fuck no.” I replied.

“Well,” Steelbeak laughed then someone shushed him so he quieted his voice a little. “I guess that made me feel a little bit better.”

“Surely you have friends now right?” I asked.

“Yeah!…Kind of… Depends on what you consider coworkers to be. Especially if they call you stupid and constantly muzzle you. I‘m NOT stupid, by the way!” Steelbeak replied, folding his arms.

“Didn’t say that you are.” I frowned. “Doesn’t sound like friends to me. I mean, playfully calling you dumb is one thing, being full on serious is another. Especially if they muzzle you.”

“Have you ever been called it before? And are you still bothered about your speech problem?” Steelbeak asked.

“Not as much now as I was when I was younger. If you meant stupid, I don’t think I’ve been called it straight to my face. But I know my teachers thought it all the time. Especially my math teachers.” I held up the notebook I hit myself with earlier and showed it saying MATH on it.

“I agree, Math is the worst.” Steelbeak chuckled. “Now I understand why you smacked yourself earlier. But come on, I doubt you did worse than me.”

“I beg to differ. You weren’t the one with an undiagnosed learning disorder so everyone thought you were legit stupid when it came to all things Math. Well, I’m pretty sure I have a learning disorder. Those tests didn’t exist as a kid so who knows. But the one I think I have makes so much sense.” I said.

“Oh really? What is it?” Steelbeak asked.

“It’s called Dyscalculia.” I replied. “It basically involves having a hard time with concepts like time, mainly analog clocks, and measurement. And not being able to remember concepts, rules, and formulas.”

“Do you think things would be different if you knew about it as a kid?”

“Probably not.” I shrugged. “It wouldn’t of changed how I still did awful in math and better in History and reading.”

“Same here.” Steelbeak said. “I wasn’t into reading much as a kid but it was definitely the easiest subject for me. History wasn’t so bad either. What type of books did you read?”

“Mainly things involving supernatural or paranormal. What about you?”

“Like I said, I didn’t read books much.” Steelbeak said.

“You mentioned Darkwing Duck, right? Did you read the comics?” I asked.

“Oh yeah! I read those all the time! Did you read them?” He asked.

“Not really. I’ve been rewatching the show with my buddy, LP.” I said.

“…You mean Launchpad?” I nodded. “Huh. Didn’t know he was into Darkwing too.”

“You know him?” I asked.

“Sort of. We met… in passing one day and I heard the kid over there talk to him. Only he was wearing blue.” He pointed to Huey.

“That was probably Dewey. Huey wears red a lot and is over there. Dewey wears blue. Louie, the third triplet, is usually wearing green.” I said and he stared at me. “What? I did help raise my honorary nephews… so of course I can tell which is which.”

“Fair enough.” Steelbeak replied with a shrug. “So what made you start school again? Was it because your kids are older now?”

“No. The boy’s mom is home now and found out I quit college over 10 years ago to help raise her kids. She basically forced me to go back.” I replied.

“And yet you’re still babysitting one of them.” Steelbeak said.

“The kids asked to come since they made their own book club. I don‘t mind watching them as I do my homework.” I shrugged.

“Where’s the rest of the kids at?” Steelbeak asked.

“Either home at the mansion or hopefully with another adult.” I said.

“Oh okay. Well, I better go look for the books that I’m here for before I forget.” Steelbeak said, standing up and taking the list out again.

After looking at the list, he frowned and looked around.

“Need help…?” I asked, noticing the look.

“Uh no. I can find them on my own. Thanks though, babe.” Steelbeak winked then walked away.

#Steelbeak #Lexi the dog #self insert #One day i'll make an Ducktales OC #For now it's the anthro version of my fursona

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philjacobsen-blog · 4 years

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Antarctica. How I learned to stop worrying and love the isolation.

I put on my gloves and face mask like I had done every day for the past six months. I wanted to protect myself, be safe and I wanted to be healthy. No, I wasn’t a prepper preparing for the end of the world and/or the coronavirus, I lived in Antarctica.

From 2002 to 2018, I spent over six years of my life working and living in Antarctica. Math might tell you that looks like “16 years,” but Antarctica works on a different schedule.

Scientists and contract laborers (like myself) have been limited to work a maximum of 14 months straight in Antarctica. Because, after 14 months of isolation, it has been said, “You might lose your mind.” Therefore, four weeks, six weeks, or eight weeks of coronavirus quarantine is like a walk on the frozen ocean.

Everyone loves Top 10 lists, but first, here is the background of life in Antarctica.

There are two different seasons in Antarctica: summer and Winter. For the laymen, that’s when it’s light 24 hours a day (summer) and then when it’s dark 24 hours a night (Winter). It’s not by accident that “Winter” is capitalized and “summer” is in lowercase. This is because you need to respect Winter.

I have spent four Winters in Antarctica. While there have been changes to the Winter schedule, when I Wintered in Antarctica at McMurdo Station, the largest of the three American bases on the 7th Continent, a plane with all of our friends, hopes, dreams and escape plans left in February. The next time we would see the lights of a plane in the sky would be in August.

In other words, shit got real when that last plane left. We had to trust we had enough food, talent and toilet paper to last us until the end of August. This is because, as the saying goes, “If we don’t have it, then you don’t need it. And, you don’t need it, because we don’t have it.”

If you run out of chicken, then you eat pork. When you run out of pork, you eat lamb, when you run out of lamb, you eat hamsters--hamsters are, what we called, microwavable breaded (or deep fried) ham and cheese Hot Pockets™®.

In other words, the grocery stores are open; quit panicking. When you’re outside, hoping your squirrel trap has been bountiful today, this is the time to panic. However, today, it’s not minus 45 degrees outside. Walmart will be restocked soon, put on your mask and gloves and purchase only what you need. Then go home.

And, if Walmart is out of toilet paper, hook a garden hose to your faucet and clean your ass, and be happy your water supply doesn’t give you frostbite.

It’s going to be fine.

In Antarctica, we were living like it was Gilligan’s Island, “No phone, no lights, no motorcar, not a single luxury.” The only difference was we had phones, lights and motorcars, but when we went outside it was minus 45 –degrees—not a luxury. Stay inside on your couch and be happy that when you do go outside to take out the trash, walk the dog or mow your lawn, you’re not getting third degree frostbite and having your toes cut off.

This little piggy went to the market. This little piggy watches Netflix. This little piggy stays home.

Speaking of movies and TV shows, my good God, we would have loved to have had Netflix, bootlegged versions of Game of Thrones, YouTube or Facebook in Antarctica. Instead, the entirety of McMurdo’s bandwidth is mostly for Science.

Rarely could I “LOL” with my friends on Facebook or “YOLO” with spring breakers at the beach. Nope, Science is the priority in Antarctica.

Science, I tell you. A bunch of people, who we called “Beakers,” is the entire reason McMurdo Station exists. These Scientist are in Antarctica to prove or disprove Global Warming and/or can penguins fly and/or are penguins cute. Generally, they proved it, but why listen to scientists?

Scientists went to school and studied stuff, but have they ever studied the “economy” or “Facebook?” Can you imagine an entire community who listens to scientists? Oh wait, you can? Possibly because we’re in a global pandemic? Yeah, listen to scientists?

During my Winters in Antarctica, I could go days and only see the one person who I worked with, and guess what? I hated him.

In the community, we called him “Skin Suit.” This was his nickname because, even though he passed his battery of psychological examinations, which are required in order to Winter-Over in Antarctica, he said to Suzy—a la “Silence of the Lambs.”

“I wish I could wear your skin, so I could touch you all day.”

So, there I was, working at the bottom of the world, with Jame “Buffalo Bill” Gume as my coworker for six months, in total darkness, and do you want to know how I got along with him (aside from the one time I threw hot coffee in his face)? I complimented his outfits. I tried to look for the positive in the people who surround me.

My first job in Antarctica, I was a dishwasher. I left my home, friends and a girlfriend to seek this adventure. I’m still happy with two out of three of those decisions.

The first year I spent in Antarctica there was a “Dishwasher Emergency” at the South Pole (850 miles from the sea level solitude of McMurdo). Just like we need grocery store employees, drive through food and universal health care, the South Pole needed a dishwasher—and they chose me.

The South Pole is located at 9,301 feet above sea level. That’s not very high. When I live my life in my hometown of Salt Lake City, I live at 4,327 feet above sea level. I have climbed high mountains in Utah, like Mt. Timpanogos that is 11,752 feet and Mt. Nebo that is 11,928 ft. I’m not healthy, but I’m also not fat.

When I was asked to work at the “high altitude” of 9,301 feet of the South Pole, I said, “Okay. I’ve done that.”

However, what I didn’t know, was that because the South Pole is at “The South Fucking Pole” it’s not just about the altitude. The South Pole has a variance of altitude because of the Earth’s centrifugal force which makes the South Pole seem much higher than the actual 9,301 feet. At times it can feel, because of lack of oxygen, as though you are over 12 or 13 thousand feet.

Before going to the South Pole, the doctors and scientists said I should take “prophylactic acetazolamide” to combat the feelings of high altitude sickness. However, my friend Donald said, “You’ll be ‘okay.’” He said that since he was from Colorado and I was from Utah, that I would be fine, because I was “use to the high altitude.”

I was at the South Pole for eight days. I quit taking prophylactic acetazolamide on day four, because I was feeling great. I listened to Donald.

On day eight, I nearly died. This wasn’t Utah. Because I’d lived at sea level for four months at McMurdo Station, and Donald didn’t know shit, my pulse oximeter (the amount of oxygen which should be in my blood and close to 100) was 52. I was failing breathing.

Pulmonary edema cut the oxygen supply to my brain making me think 3 + 7 = Cat. The South Pole doctor said, “Phil, you are two to four hours from death.”

All flights to the South Pole were canceled on this day, due to weather, but, due to “2 to 4 hours of death,” a C130 National Guard Airplane risked their lives and flew from McMurdo Station to rescue me at the South Pole. If not for universal Antarctica Health Care, I could be dead.

On this day, I learned I needed to listen to the scientists, and not to Donald.

This story ended up being too long. I’m sorry. I’ve lived through isolation, listened to friends, instead of the medical community, and somehow I’m still alive. How did Antarctica prepare me for the isolation of the coronavirus?

1: Do something today better than you did yesterday. Did you go to bed sooner? Wake up earlier? Brush your cat?

2: Exercise. In Antarctica my exercise routine was called, “Brushing the Dust Off of David.” There is no reason to take a hammer and chisel to David. All you need to do is to take a wet cloth and brush off the dust. Do 10 sit ups, pushups, or jog in place. Be happy with who you are, and barely maintain. If you set higher expectations, you might fail. Simply, brush the dust off of your personal David.

3: Do something better today than you did yesterday. There were many times in Antarctica I got more drunk on Friday than I did on Thursday. I’m not advocating alcoholism, but lower your expectations. Don’t look for perfection when a glass of wine might do.

4: Did you make your bed after you woke up? Some days you will go to bed and your biggest accomplishment will be, “I made that bed today.” Congratulations.

5: Groundhog Day. Every day may seem like yesterday, but, how did you make it different? In Antarctica, after six months of Winter the trash shelves are lined with “Learn ‘This Language’ in 30 Days” DVDs. Nobody accomplishes a lot during the isolation of Winter. But, if we do little, then that is a lot.

6: Communication. Does your phone work? In Antarctica, no one can call us, so we have to call out. Instead of waiting for ‘that phone call.’ Make it.

7: Don’t go outside. It’s too cold. In the Covid-19 case, it’s too dangerous. My dad goes to dialysis three times a week; please don’t kill him. Don’t go outside.

8: Appreciate your pets. In Antarctica we are not allowed to have pets. I started the “Antarctica Cat Club.” All we did was share photos of our cats from home that we wished to be with. Now, we get to live a cat’s life. Nap. Eat. Shit. Nap. Clean. Nap. Eat. Repeat.

Love your pets you lucky sons of bitches.

9: Art. Be creative. Rather you’re by yourself or preferably, with only yourself. Do something artistic. For instance, today, I chose to write this Manifesto. In Antarctica a group of us recreated the (drunk) history of the race to South Pole by Roald Amundsen and Robert Scott (https://vimeo.com/35084075). What will you or your isolated group create?

10: Know that it ends. A plane will come and take you away or scientists will tell you it’s safe to go outside. And then, it’s over. You take off your mask and gloves. You shop at a grocery store, you go to a movie, you hug your parents or, you love being able to hold those who you love.

Stay warm. Stay isolated. And, stay indoors.

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bobbystompy · 4 years

Text

68 Quotes I Enjoyed From 2019

Below are my favorite quotes from 2019. Though most occurred throughout the year, some took place before but were encountered during.

1) “I don’t bitch about Millenials.

John Entwistle once complained that he didn’t understand rap. Pete Townsend said, ‘It’s not our job to understand it. It’s our job to get the fuck out of the way.’

New generations come of age. The older generation’s job is to shut up and adapt.” - @danagould

2) “I can’t do drugs with you until we kiss.”

3) “If you pay me $50 I'll show up to your funeral but stand really far away, holding a black umbrella regardless of the weather, so that people think you died with a dark and interesting secret.” - @DanaSchwartzzz

4) “A human being is a dangerous thing to let loose in a room with itself, when it cannot think.” - Roger Ebert

5) “There are no bad bourbons, only better bourbons.” - Dave Hernandez

6) “You can’t put a dollar in a kimono.”

7) “This is how it was.” - rampant takeaway from watching ‘Superbad’ several years after its release

8) “What if I had been born fifty years before you in a house on the street where you lived / Maybe I’d be outside as you passed on your bike / Would I know? / And in a wide sea of eyes, I see one pair that I recognize” - Ben Folds, ‘The Luckiest’

9) “Learn the rules so you can break them.”

10) “Nobody makes chili for two.” - Stacy Massey

11) “‘Best city in the world,’ I mutter to myself, as i adjust my ‘driving blanket’.” - Chicago resident Deanna Belos, during the 2019 Polar Vortex

12) “Dude, no one’s ever got arrested for listening to Counting Crows.” - Ricky O’Donnell, justifying late night music volume at his party

13) Bill Belichick: We’re going to have fun tonight. Rob Gronkowski: Yes we are. We deserve it. Belichick: You’re damn right. Gronk: I haven’t stepped out in like eight months. I gotta step out tonight. Belichick: I’m with you, man. I’m even going to step out. Gronk: Oh, I like it!

A Super Bowl winning exchange.

14) Center David Andrews thanked Bill Belichick for giving him "a shot".

Belichick disagreed with it.

Andrews: Thank you for giving me a shot. Belichick: A shot? I didn't give you shit. You earned it! I don't give anything.

Another Super Bowl winning exchange.

15) “We elected one of the very worst living human beings to be President, and it's exhausting. Each and every day, it's an exhausting slog, just to exist in a world where that's true.” - Michael Schur

16) “Some of y’all always picked Odd Job when you played Goldeneye and it shows” - @thedad

17) “Any app is a dating app if you try hard enough.” - Z.W. Martin (though he says it’s lifted)

18) "Once you're as woke as I am, you learn to feel bad all the time.”

19) “Everything’s a balance beam when you’re 90.” - John Dingell

20) [I wake up in a world where The Beatles never existed]

Me: Check out this song I just wrote

[I begin playing “Ob La Di Ob La Da” without having first built up years of goodwill]

Crowd of people: Wow, this sucks ass

-- @seanoneal

21) “People change people.” - Corey Matthews, Girl Meets World

22) “The easiest thing to do on earth is not write.” - William Goldman

23) “Dan could be like a difficult uncle. I didn’t love his fire-breathing conservative politics. I didn’t love the transformation that came over his novels. In Semi-Tough, he created two benighted Texas jocks and laid their prejudices bare. He was declaring himself a member of the Mark Twain coaching tree. In later books, Dan seemed to be trying to prove he could still tell a racist joke. He insisted that his memoir—the last truly immaculate piece of writing he delivered—include a tirade against political correctness. When his editor said people might be offended, Dan said, ‘Fuck people.’

There are certain writers whose style you pilfer. Certain writers whose moral fiber you try to inherit. For me, Dan represented a third category: a writer whose aura you replicate—or, failing that, try to stand in for a while.” - Bryan Curtis, on Dan Jenkins

24) “Never marry anything. Never choose. Even in love, it's better to be chosen.” - La Dolce Vita

25) “An uncluttered, uncomplicated happy ending might sound wonderful, but it’s hardly ever satisfying. Because the value of great stories lies in the tension between desire and need, between the yearning for the ideal, and the unshakable conviction that ideals don’t really exist, at least not the way we want them to. A great story should hurt a little when it leaves us. There should be some hope, but that hope should remain somewhere just an inch beyond our fingers, because that’s the truth. Even if you had all the perfect moments in the world, you’d still be reaching.” - Zach Handlen, on the Futurama series finale

26) “You can’t see him because he has sunglasses on.” - Alissa Levy

27) “The cinema is the greatest art form ever conceived for generating emotions in its audience. That's what it does best. (If you argue instead for dance or music, drama or painting, I will reply that the cinema incorporates all of these arts).” - Roger Ebert

28) “‘Are you gonna let politics ruin a friendship?’

Yes tf I am

People talk about politics as if it’s this isolated, abstract concept that only matters at election time. Somebody’s politics is their world view. It’s whether they think certain human beings deserve rights. It’s how they think the world should be. And if somebody thinks that the world should be colder, meaner, less accepting and downright hostile to people that are different to them, then sure as fuck is the friendship over.”

29) “Can the Supreme Court get me mushrooms?” - J-Papp

30) “Any song under two minutes already has a head start on its way into my heart. Just scream at me and then leave me.” - Drew Magary

31) “Long neck cold beers never broke my heart.” - Clemson Tom

32) “I’d just like to point out that the last spoken words of Game of Thrones were:

‘I once brought a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel.’”

- @Authoroux

33) “Just once before I die, I want to toss my keys to someone and tell them ‘Bring the car around’.” - Mike Skully

34) “For all the weight they're given, last words are usually as significant as first words.” - Grand Maester Pycelle, Game of Thrones

35) “The best remedy for unrequited love is a trip around the world.” - Cheers

36) [on switching from a hotel to a motel]

Manny: I don't like the sound of that. A lot of amenities disappear when an H turns into an M. Jay: Hey when I met you, you were eating cereal out of a bucket.

-- Modern Family

37) “You and Lindsey don’t want to be ‘estranged’. Estranged is the relationship we want to have with our mothers.” - MegFil

38) “Cigarettes are undefeated.”

39) “My toes are like my fingers on my feet. I can pick stuff up with them.” - Tracy Cunningham

40) “Republicans govern without shame, Democrats shame without governing.” - Bill Maher

41) Sam: I don’t understand the vagaries of the Internet Josiah: Post often, without thought, and you’ll either get cancelled or cancel someone else.

-- Blink-155

42) “Hang a lantern on your problems.”

43) “What a weird web we weave.” - The Situation, The Jersey Shore: Family Vacation

44) “Let the ocean worry about being blue.” - Alabama Shakes, ‘Hang Loose’

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45) “Honesty without tact is cruelty.” - Shelley Rokos

46) “My whole life is the wrong porn link.”

47) “One parent can take care of 10 kids, but 10 kids cannot take care of one parent.” - Joe Gestetner, via “an old Yiddish saying”

48) “There are no heroes in the room.” - Classics of Love, ‘Gun Show’

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49) “If I am a little dismissive, it's only because of my harrowing backstory.” - Mitchell, Modern Family (on why he doesn't like sports)

50) “Every time I’m wearing black, I meet a dog.” - Tracy Cunningham

51) “Shower sex? Why would I fuck in my crying chamber” - @chridollarsign

52) “My theory about quarterbacks, having written about some of them, is you either have to believe in god or think you are a god.” - Mina Kimes

53) “The contradictions of capitalism always manifest in our lyrics if you look deeply.” - Blake Schwarzenbach of Jawbreaker, Riot Fest 2019

54) “Got a ‘hang loose’ from the weakside bartender.”

55) “It’s Jennifer’s birthday always.” - Eric Hutchinson

56) “I can’t think of a less relevant artist in 2019 than Kanye West. A Jesus freak in a MAGA hat. Yeah, congrats dude -- you’re every grandma who watches ‘Young Sheldon’ and mails checks to Joel Osteen now.” - Dan Ozzi

57) “The past and future are in the mind. I’m in the now.” - Tom Brady, via someone else

58) “Sometimes you walk around boring places and you feel like the most exciting thing in it.” - Drew Magary

59) “Sitting is the new smoking.” - Modern Family

60) “I'll straight up fight folks at a book club and discuss books at a fight club I really don't give a shit anymore.” - George Wallace

61) “Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.” - Rose Garvey via wine country

62) “It’s all ‘ok boomer’ until you need someone who can drive stick shift.” - @OrdinaryAlso

63) “He likes the result of the math.” - Dad, talking about my worst subject frustrating during the process but satisfying in the end

64) Stepmom: Do you want a Bears urn or Alabama urn? Dad: Ask me after they play Auburn.

65) “A cold body carries a warm heart.” - Stefanos Tsitsipas’ Instagram, after his Iceland sabbatical

66) [preparing a dish called the Sandwich of Justice with his friend’s recipe]

"The fun thing about it is when you give it to someone, you can say 'Justice is served.’ That's, uh, Ryan's line. I built my whole life on the backs of my friends." - You Suck At Cooking

67) “Usually three people can keep a secret only when two of them are dead.” - The Irishman

68) “An artist can't control who consumes their content any more than a chemist can control how their chemicals are used once they're created.” - Brian Crooks

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frighthouseofalighthouse · 5 years

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I'M GONNA DO IT TO EM' ALL ASKS THAT YOU REBLOG TONIGHT TILL 10 AM TOMORROW.... DO THEM!!!!

Hey, you had to do it to ‘em! Here they are starting with the most recent.

“Weird asks that say a lot”

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Coffee mugs because you can use them for everything. Teacups are too small for a proper cuppa.

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Chocolate bars always.

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Bubblegum, which I miss so much. I haven’t had it in over 2 years bc of my braces

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

I didn’t go to public school but all the adults who dealt with me said I was sociable and tried to get everyone to do the group projects but no one listened so I ended up sitting alone reading and quietly doing the project.

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

Glass BOTTLES make it taste superior.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

Pastel boho preppy goth best describes my style.

7. earbuds or headphones?

Earbuds, but only rubber tipped ones. The plastic ones never fit in my ears. Also headphones never cover my whole ear right. :/

8. movies or tv shows?

TV shows keep my attention span better.

9. favorite smell in the summer?

Brewing thunderstorms.

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

None. But trampoline if I had to pick.

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

Scrambled eggs, peanut butter toast, and some kind of fruit.

12. name of your favorite playlist?

My main one is Things You Love. My one for writing is Queen And Country, and my other two favorites are Summer Songs and A Queen Knows How To Fight A War.

13. lanyard or key ring?

Key ring, lanyards get in the way.

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Swedish Fish or Sour Patch Kids.

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

OH MAN. To Kill A Mockingbird, The Great Gatsby, Fahrenheit 451, The Grapes Of Wrath, and The Handmaid’s Tale were definitely my top 5 in English class.

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Curled up sideways in an armchair with my legs slung over the arm. Sitting normally sucks.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

Either pair of my black boots, or my pink floral Skechers that I wear to work.

18. ideal weather?

60 degrees, cloudy, windy, with a chance of rain.

19. sleeping position?

On my right side, arms around a fluffy pillow, one leg out straight and the other drawn up with my knee to my chest.

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Laptop. I’m trying to exercise my hand and wrist so I don’t tire as quick of notebook writing, though.

21. obsession from childhood?

History, Nancy Drew books, Harry Potter, and ghost stories.

22. role model?

The person I am but don’t think I am.

23. strange habits?

Pulling my shirt collar up over my nose and mouth/putting it in my mouth and chewing on it.

24. favorite crystal?

Amethyst, my birthstone! Close second is blue goldstone. (Have you ever seen it? It looks like the universe. I have a worrystone made of blue goldstone and it’s one of my prized possessions.)

25. first song you remember hearing?

Something from church probably. Outside of church probably one of these: If I Had A Hammer // Peter, Paul and Mary, Puff The Magic Dragon // Peter, Paul and Mary, Scarborough Fair // Simon & Garfunkel, The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald // Gordon Lightfoot.

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Sit in the shade.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

Drink tea, read, and play either Pokemon or Nancy Drew and the Clue Benders Society on my 3DS.

28. five songs to describe you?

The Pines // Roses & Revolutions, I Am Here // Pink, Walk Me Home // Pink, Call Home // Heathers (not the musical), Traveler’s Song // Aviators

29. best way to bond with you?

Talk to me about history, crime, musicals, books, or tv shows

30. places that you find sacred?

Natural swamps. Libraries. Old, overgrown gardens. Anywhere historic. Pine forests at dusk. Anywhere under a clear night sky.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

A plaid shirt, black leggings, and black boots with dark neutral lipstick and a black choker.

32. top five favorite vines?

Fre she vocado, BENTLEY NOOOOO, uhhh I sure hope it does, the one of Lin Manuel-Miranda trying to brainstorm, and this bitch empty YEEt

33. most used phrase in your phone?

Idk how to find this out

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

Idk if this is just a local thing here but WOW ITS NATURESTONE

35. average time you fall asleep?

12-1 nowadays.

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

I can haz cheezburger

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Depends. Suitcase for things like my laptop that are better protected than in a duffel bag, but duffel bag otherwise because they’re easier to carry.

38. lemonade or tea?

TEAAAAA

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

Both please

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

My house? We had a safe word when we did math. It was “quokka.” If we got overwhelmed we’d say it and then stop and look at pictures of quokkas.

41. last person you texted?

My friend and coworker.

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

Jacket pockets.

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

Cardigan or hoodie

44. favorite scent for soap?

Lavender

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy. It takes me a bit to get into fantasy books usually, but sci-fi is hard to follow and superhero is mostly predictable.

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Fuzzy pants and a t shirt

47. favorite type of cheese?

Muenster, parmesan, or goat cheese

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

Raspberry

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

“I have no country to fight for. My country is the earth, and I am a citizen of this world.” - Eugene V. Debs

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

A weird local political ad a couple years back.

51. current stresses?

My recent breakup, an overnight shift I work on Wednesday night, and trying to find time to go out to a corn maze with my friend.

52. favorite font?

Baskerville or Georgia.

53. what is the current state of your hands?

Covered in small cuts and scrapes from work, nails picked short, black nail polish mostly peeled off.

54. what did you learn from your first job?

babysitting job: Kids suck never have more than one. Retail job: being on your fee it hardddd

55. favorite fairy tale?

Beauty and the Beast or Rapunzel

56. favorite tradition?

Looking at Halloween decorations

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

Cutting, being manipulated by my dad, and letting other people make me believe I wasn’t good enough (still working on that one)

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Writing, puzzle-solving, singing, and calligraphy

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“Oh shit waddup”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

One of those preppy gothic private school animes with a dark secret lurking around the corner

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

Book: “Ignoring isn’t the same as ignorance. You have to work at it.” - The Handmaid’s Tale. Movie: “It’s not about deserve. It’s about what you believe. And I believe in love.” - Wonder Woman. TV Show: “I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself.” - Doctor Who.

62. seven characters you relate to?

Hermione Granger, Luna Lovegood, Remus Lupin, Richard Gansey III, Blue Sargent, Dean Winchester, Charlie Bradbury.

63. five songs that would play in your club?

Same five that I said describe me.

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Webkinz and the old American Girl site circa 2009.

65. any permanent scars?

One down my chest from heart surgery as a baby, lots from self harm on my arms/legs, some on my left knee from falling as a kid, and one on the back of my right heel from being pecked by a goose at the fair when I was 11.

66. favorite flower(s)?

Sunflowers, roses, and dahlias.

67. good luck charms?

Myself.

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

Ranch anything.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Jellyfish have no brains and no heart.

70. left or right handed?

I’m third generation left handed!

71. least favorite pattern?

Vertical stripes.

72. worst subject?

Math.

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

Wendy’s fries and chocolate frosty.

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

7. Usually I just ignore it because I have a “high pain tolerance” (which means I like to put myself through minor pains because I think I deserve it)

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

Age 5. I was trying to blow up an inflatable ball and it came out.

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

ALL POTATOES EXCEPT POTATO SALAD

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

Violets.

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

Neither, both suck equally.

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

Never had a school id so I guess the license

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Earth tones for me

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

...They are literally the same thing

82. pc or console?

83. writing or drawing?

Writing. I absolutely cannot draw.

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcasts, talk radio is so obnoxious.

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie. The clothes are easier to take on and off. I used to accidentally rip polly pocket clothes all the time.

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Mythology. I like it because it explains things, it’s creation stories, its origins. Fairy tales are just fantasies or cautionary tales.

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Cookies.

87. your greatest fear?

Rejection, drowning, and clowns.

88. your greatest wish?

To be a semi-successful author and historian.

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My mom.

90. luckiest mistake?

Not succeeding in killing myself!

91. boxes or bags?

Bags.

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

Dim lamps if they have yellow bulbs. I hate white lights. And also fairy lights yes please.

93. nicknames?

Ellie, Ell, Little Lion, Lioness.

94. favorite season?

FALLLLL

95. favorite app on your phone?

Tumblr, Spotify, or Instagram.

96. desktop background?

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

98. favorite historical era?

Revolutionary War-era America or late Victorian England.

THIS GOT REALLY LONG AND I DONT WANNA HIT THE TEXT BLOCK LIMIT SO IMMA DO ALL THE HALLOWEEN ONES SEPARATELY, MAYBE IN THE MORNING.

#a series of essays anonymously published

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gulgbtqplus · 5 years

Text

Meet the Committee 2019/20

We have 16 committee members who work together to run the society:

1. President: Maddy, She/her, [email protected]

Hi, my name's Maddy, I use she/her pronouns, and I'm the current president of gulgbtq+! I'm a third year medical student and I was the previous welfare officer. I spend most of my time hanging out with my rat, hiding in the library, and doing things with gulgbtq+. I'm a chatty gal and I love meeting new people, so feel free to scream with me about Troye Sivan/Hayley Kiyoko/Charli XCX anytime.

If you have any questions or ideas, hit me up! I'm very excited to be a part of the society this year and engage with all our members ❤

2. VP Secretary: Quinn, He/Him, [email protected]

Hi I'm Quinn and I am your secretary this year for GULGBTQ+. I am an economic and social history student who has been going to GULGBTQ+ events since my first moment in Glasgow. I enjoy poetry, comedy and films, and dogs, dogs are good. Can't wait to see you at events! If you ever want to message myself or the committee with any questions, suggestions or comments I can be reached at [email protected], see you soon!

3. Treasurer: Emily B, She/Her, [email protected]

Hi! I’m Emily, the new VP Treasurer! I’m 21, use she/her pronouns, and am proudly bisexual. I’m currently in 4th year, studying history (dissertation time, yikes!) I’ve been part of the society over the last year, and it’s been one of the best parts of my university experience. I’ve made new friends, increased my self-confidence, and had tons of good gay times! Outside of the society, I enjoy going to gigs, caring for my many houseplants, and taking too many naps. I’m excited for my role on committee this year, although you know what they say about gays and maths! I’m constantly on social media, so feel free to drop me a bell if you have any questions or queries! I’m on twitter @_emilybarton. Hope to see you at an event soon :-)

4. Welfare: Bianca, She/he, [email protected]

Hello! My name is Bianca and I'm the Welfare Officer of GULGBTQ+. I'm a small twenty-year-old Italian and I am a third year English Language & Linguistics and Theatre Studies student. I spend most of my free time reading, crying over Shakespeare, or bingeing the latest gay shows on Netflix, and the rare times I decide to go outside and try sports I enjoy horse riding and ice skating. I'm a gryffindor and I'm very excited to be back on committee this year, so feel free to drop me an e-mail for anything you might need!

5. Events: Emily T, She/Her, [email protected]

Hi everyone! My name's Emily (Tunstall) and this year I'm really excited to be the Events Coordinator for GULGBTQ+! I'm a second year Psychology Student and in my free time I like drawing, painting, making new friends, and spending time with this society. ❤

Please feel free to say hi to me online or in person, I will almost always be wearing my Docs and at least one badge, be it on my bag or my denim jacket, if you need help recognising me. I'm always open for a good chat, to offer some advice, or if you just need some directions around Uni! I would really love to see you at our events on a Wednesday, or at one of our coffees during the week. 🌈🌈🌈

6. Women’s: Claire, She/Her, [email protected]

Hi, I'm Claire, and I'm your women's officer! I'm a third year in Microbiology. Ask me about worms. Sometimes I think I'm not a stereotype but then I remember I have two cats, a Hozier-centric Spotify, and build furniture for a hobby.

I'm so excited for another great year! One of the things I love about this society is that it's an inclusive space for all women, and I want to make everyone feel welcome. If you have any comments, questions, or concerns (or just want to chat) feel free to shoot me a message!

8. Trans: Cassidy, They/Them, [email protected]

Hey, I'm Cassidy (they/them) the new Trans officer! I'm 20 and a third year studying Classics and History. I'm a nonbinary trans woman and I'm here to represent trans people and help people with gender related things generally 🙂

Aside from being gender, I am a roller skating gamer who makes stuffed toys and loves history more than life itself. I'm looking forward to running coffee and having a great year with everyone 🙂

9. Postgraduate and Mature Students: Kyle, He/Him, [email protected]

Hey, hi, hello! I’m Kyle, a postgraduate Astrophysics student who’ll be your first PostMat Officer for this year! Avid Karaoke Fan and Polo R&B Room Resident, I’ll usually be found out and about when I’m not studying (procrastinating). My aim for the time that I’m here is to try and get more LGBTQ+ Postgraduate and Mature students involved with GULGBTQ+.

I haven’t been in Glasgow for very long, so I’m excited to share the experience of things like Glasgow Pride with you all! I’m also hoping to run some smaller gatherings (like the current PostMat Coffees) over the summer for those of us who will need a break from our dissertations. If any PostMat students have ideas to share or any concerns to raise, please don’t be afraid to email.

10. Campaigns: Jo, They/He, [email protected]

Hi, I’m Jo and I’m your Campaigns Officer! I’m a postgraduate research student in English Language & Linguistics with a particular love for all things to do with LGBTQ+ linguistics. I’m a big fan of knitting, baking, indoor bouldering and playing D&D, and I’m also involved with the English Language & Linguistics Society. I was Campaigns Officer the year before last in 2017/2018, but I just couldn’t stay away, and now I’m back for some more campaigning!

As Campaigns Officer, my role is to raise awareness of LGBTQ+ issues in the society, on campus, and in the wider world. In the past, I’ve helped run campaigns to increase awareness of trans people on campus and to encourage local hairdressers and barbers to be inclusive of their LGBTQ+ customers. This year, I hope to revitalise these campaigns and work with our other officers and members of the society to create some exciting new ones!

Please feel free to contact me if you’d like to get involved in campaigning or have any ideas that you’d like to share with me!

11. Communications and Technology: Summer, They/Them, [email protected]

Hi, I’m Summer and I’m the Communications and Technology Officer for the year! I’m a 5th year computing science student (yes, that kind of transfem!) so you’ll frequently find me programming, tinkering with Linux or providing tech support for someone. When I’m not doing that I’ll probably be knitting, playing video games, running tabletop rpgs or watching martial arts movies (or talking about how I don't have time for any of the above)!

As the recently renamed Communications and Technology officer (formerly Publicity) I'm mostly here for you to tell me why the website or mailing list doesn't work, so feel free to get in touch with any complaints and/or constructive criticisms. I hope to have a great year with you all, hopefully with a better website!

12: First Year Ordinary Member: Jenny, She/Her, [email protected]

Hiya! I’m Jenny and I’m the interim first year representative on the GULGBTQ+ committee. I’m going into second year studying biomedical engineering and in my free time I enjoy drawing, making soup, and loving my gf. I met wonderful friends and made loads of good gay memories through the society in my first year and am excited to help as many freshers as possible join in on the fun this year! I’m passionate about creating a loving and accepting community for all LGBTQ+ students, especially new ones, since I know how hard it can be to settle in. If you’re a fresher and have any ideas, questions, or just want to make a new friend, please don’t hesitate to send me an email!

13: Bi/Pan: Valentine, They/ve, [email protected]

Hi I'm Niamh, you may recognise me as last year's nonbinary officer! I use they/them pronouns, I'm 20 and a 3rd year psychology student. This'll be my 3rd year in the society and I love it with my whole heart. If you have any issues feel free to email me or message me on Facebook (Niamh Conlan). My first and foremost want is for those coming to the society and bi events to feel comfortable and welcomed!

When I'm not being a disaster bisexual I'm dying my hair, applying clown makeup, dancing to new wave or doing kendo. I'm excited to meet you all and hope to have a great year with everyone!

14. International Students: Judith, She/they, [email protected]

Hi! I’m Judith, I’ve been described as “the lesbianest person I know” by my flatmate and if you ask me where I’m from, I’m likely to name three countries, so I guess it makes sense that I’d be your international officer. I’m a third year psychology and statistics student who likes to avoid studying by going swordfighting (yes, I own an actual sword, but don’t worry, I only use it against transphobes) or putting on facepaint before a metal gig. But don’t get the wrong impression, I’m actually a very quiet person who’s always there to listen or give you advice. Feel free to message me on Facebook (Judith AN), send me an email or just come talk to me during the international coffees I’ll be running!

15. Aromantic and Asexual: Lo, They/Them, [email protected]

Hello! I’m Leilo (they/them), 20, and happy to be the ace/aro officer! My job is to represent people who are (or are questioning if they are) on the spectrums of being aromantic or asexual, so feel free to email me! As ace/aro officer I host biweekly coffees so aros, aces, and those who are questioning, can come together.

I’m a second year Maths student but will probably add philosophy as my second main subject. Aside from sitting over Math problems for way longer than seems necessary, you will find me writing, working out, or philosophising about bdsm.

16: Non-binary: Robyn, They/Them, [email protected]

Salut! I’m Robyn and I’m the Non-Binary Officer. I’m a 2nd Year French/History student and I was born in Glasgow - I’m like a rare pokemon. I only resurrect during Eurovision season and have a hoard of sunglasses. And I’m a massive comic book nerd (yes I am Batman’s sidekick on the side).

I’m always down for a chat and feel free to DM me with anything from issues, to memes! I’m very excited to be your Non-Binary boi this year!!

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lololollywrites · 5 years

Text

thoughts about being 29 on the internet that i just had in the shower...

...and had to write down. they were all basically just about how f**king - NEW. and surreal. the internet, its capabilities, and its fandoms can still be to me sometimes. i feel like i forget this a lot. but when i think about it, i can easily recall my wonder at discovering that it all existed in waves of smaller finds. and because i know there are others like me, i thought i’d share some of my own experiences. because honestly, i’ve had fewer years on tumblr and sites like it than some people much younger than me. i’m catching up and enjoying it.

firstly, i know i’m old to some of you, but i’m not really old. not really. i’m still a millennial, screwed over by student loans and old white men and viewed as part of the technological generation. i’m a phd student, and because i’m always on a college campus, i’ve been mistaken as a freshman. a few times. but it’s been fascinating to witness actual freshman and other college students and consider just how different things are for them and honestly? i’m sort of jealous.

because...

i can remember when i first discovered that fanfiction existed. i was in third period tech skills as a junior in high school - 16 years old - and got a little off-topic and searched for spoilers for a new supernatural episode. this was in 2005 and the show had just come out (yes i still watch, i can’t escape).

and what did i find? somehow? fanfiction.net. i was, no exaggeration, shocked. i sat and read a full-length chaptered fic in episodic format. my mouth was hanging open. i saw thousands more fics in hundreds of fandoms and suddenly felt less strange for envisioning full-scale episode re-imaginings in my head as i laid in bed, dissatisfied with what i had just watched. (btw, i watched new supernatural episodes the sunday after they used to originally air on the wb on thursdays, at my mom’s house where i had my own room and own tiny tv, because no one at my dad’s house wanted to watch and streaming episodes wasn’t something i could even imagine. plus i didn’t have internet at my dad’s house. i know.)

not only that, but i was impressed as hell. here was me, not even aware that you could somehow upload your own text to the internet, and people were not simply writing polished stories in private but posting them somewhere that allowed for chapters. that allowed for people all over the world to read their words. that categorized everything into a huge virtual library. and, most incredibly to me, that allowed for reviews from people around the world.

i couldn’t believe that this new world was open to me. that people would be so generous as to offer amazing stories to me to read FOR FREE. that i had a limitless supply of content to read and review. i barely had functioning internet at home, so i had been sheltered. i told the people sitting next to me in class about it and encouraged them to check it out, mostly to blank stares. i may have even told the teacher, but no one cared. i didn’t understand. who wouldn’t be interested? i told my dad and my sister about it when i got home from school. i was mind-blown.

months in and many reads and written reviews later, i wrote my first fic. it was for smallville. 6 chapters, with updates every few days, that received 14 reviews in total. i read them all multiple times. i showed my sister. i checked the story stats every half hour. i cried. i wrote on the family computer secretly in the evening when most of my family had gone upstairs, because i was about half a year away from owning my first laptop. i wrote more stories sporadically for about 6 years, gradually getting better, but also gradually becoming more stressed and aware of negativity, online arguments, and the embarrassment and shame i suddenly felt about having an online presence. i found a supernatural forum at tv.com (the forums sadly no longer exist), learned about fandom, and immersed myself in posting and being part of a community that i thought understood me more than my friends. like a secret life.

during my first year of college, in 2007, i was in a friend’s dorm when he asked everyone if we wanted to watch an episode of scrubs. i laughed. surely he was joking. “how can we just watch an episode? it’s not on now and you don’t have the dvds.” i literally didn’t consider that there may have been a way. he excitedly told us that he had found some website that had episodes just... pre-uploaded. and that you could just click. i didn’t believe him. the stress of having to be at the tv at a certain time each week for fear of missing an episode entirely and forever was just part of being a fan, right? buying the tv guide and checking listings was necessary. but he found the episode. and clicked. it only took a few full minutes to load and there it was. again, i was astounded. this memory is so shockingly clear to me. it changed how i spent much of my free time, for one. just that moment.

sometime during this first year of college, i was home for break and came across a video on youtube, this new website i had started to use. it reminded me of ebaum’s world, which my friend would show me at her house sometimes because her computer was faster than mine. it was called “cat soup”, and by two guys that called themselves smosh. it had more views than i could comprehend - probably not much more than 5 digits, but still. they were just two kids i could have gone to school with who could create a funny video and get famous. again, i was shocked. mind-blown.

i showed my sister, my mom, and all my friends. they appreciated it a bit more than the fanfiction, but no one seemed to grasp how incredible and revolutionary it was. they all liked “shoes”, with the kelly persona by liam kyle sullivan (we still quote it today), probably because its budget and effects made it a bit more familiarly professional and it appeared less homemade (though it definitely was). but i couldn’t forget smosh. i was so impressed by them. i watched more videos and eventually found communitychannel and jenna marbles and eviliguana and shane dawson. i even found fan edits for my faves, buffy (maybe i saw one of phil’s, lol) and supernatural and smallville, and tried making my own. i freaked in 2009 or so when fred reached a million subscribers. a million. i couldn’t wrap my head around that. again, i told my sister and friends, expecting them to see the enormity of something so crazy happening, and they just... didn’t.

back in 2008, after watching “stick it” again, i recalled the name of a gymnast my cousin used to always talk about when we were kids - from the 1996 olympics - and looked her up on youtube. i realized that all gymnastics competitions imaginable had been uploaded. again - not to be repetitive - but i was shocked. there’s no better word. i gave myself a thorough education on the sport, traveling through time. i am still so grateful that i was able to do that.

sometime in 2009, my friends started pestering me to create a facebook account. i was a junior in college. 20 years old already. it sounded weird - pictures of me online? why? but i gave into pressure and made one. my mom had never allowed us to make a myspace; we were a bit young, and she hated the idea (now, she’s on facebook more than i am). around the same time i got my fanciest phone yet - an LG Env3. i figured out that it could access the internet and that i could use songs to create ringtones. again, sufficiently mind-blown. considering my first cell phone had been a flip phone with no camera that i shared with my sister during emergencies when i was 13, i felt that technology was coming along fast.

smart phones were foreign to me for a long long time, until recently actually. i thought they were unnecessary for quite a while. i don’t even remember what phones i had at the end of college and through grad school, but i’m pretty sure they consisted of a series of cheap pay-as-you-go phones from walmart. in 2013, i went to china for a year to teach. i got a cheap phone there and used it for about 7 months. one day, a friend of mine gave me his old htc smartphone because he was getting a new one. i didn’t know how to use it, but i played one app on repeat before class and snapped some low-quality photos. after that, i almost immediately went to indonesia for another 9 months to teach high school (2014-2015). the htc phone died very quickly, so i used the nokia brick phone given to me by the organization. it was fine. i had never even used my old smartphone to access the internet, aside from wechat, thanks to china’s internet blocks. it wasn’t until i got home, in the summer of 2015, that i finally got an iphone. it was a huge deal and a big learning curve. it was also around this time that i found dan and phil and tumblr. i only got my macbook two years ago and finally think i have some things figured out.

so i may be old in some ways and remember floppy disks and the card catalog and using encyclopedias to write my middle school papers and huge computers with black screens and green text that displayed math problems in elementary school. i may be able to remember the sound of ancient, huge printers that used reams of paper with perforated, tearable strips down each side. i may remember aol red, dial-up, and not being able to connect if someone was on the phone. but i can also remember watching technology evolve in front of me, discovering fandom and the huge world of content and friendship that lay ahead. and when people try to say i’m too old to like dan and phil, i remind them that dan and phil can also remember. we’re the same age. i relate to them and their stories. to phil’s buffy obsession. to dan’s love of smosh. i’ve only had about 10 fully-cognizant years here on the internet, and only a couple in the world of tumblr and iphones and mobile apps. i’m young in those ways. and i look young enough that strangers sometimes think i’m a teenager.

that’s laughable to me in some ways, because i’ve lived so much since my teen years. so much has happened. but in others, i don’t feel much different. there’s no age where you just feel grown up. that your interests vanish. that things suddenly seem childish and dumb. yes, i cringe about some things i wrote or did back then and i think i’ve matured, but my interests are all still relatively similar and i can finally explore them in ways that i just couldn’t before.

i hope that this has made sense. and i hope that some can relate.

#fandom #text post #sorry about this #i had to get it out #stories #me #dan and phil #kind of #well i mention them

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kimmycup · 5 years

Text

15 Questions

Tagged by @shirasade . Thank you!

1. Are you named after anyone?

I have a patron saint and my parents chose her consciously but I think the name itself and the fact the name is a nickname in itself might have had more of a sway. My second name is my mothers, as it is a tradition in the family to have the second name after a parent. My third name I chose myself and it’s Clara after Pope Francis :D

2. When was the last time you cried?

Let out a few tears over a fic last week, full on cried last year at a funeral of my great grandmother.

3. Do you have/want kids?

Not have but I want them.

I want three kids, and I want to adopt them all. I was pretty sure I want kids since I was young and I knew I want to adopt already at 16, thinking giving life (which already seemed unappealing) is senseless when children’s homes are full.

Back then mom told me I may change my mind when I’m older but instead, I realized I’m ace and was right all along and my determination to adopt only grew. :)

Please, let’s fight the idiotic concept this fucking society of ours has that bioligical children are somehow more special, FUCK THIS, don’t do this, it’s harmful, it’s wrong, and I firmly believe us coming up with in vitro conception when there are thousands of kids out there without a home is just plain cruel.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Not that much, actually? I mean, sometimes, sure, but I don’t think I’m overly sarcastic. I guess part of that may also be because I’m bad at reading sarcasm. It flies over my head.

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

How open they are. Because I suck at social interaction, so it’s sort of a defense mechanism, I guess? I look at people unconsciously expecting to see they do not want to be approached, especially by me.

6. What’s your eye color?

Hazel/brown.

7. Scary movie or happy ending?

Happy endings. ALWAYS. I mean, I like pretty scare before but always with a happy ending.

8. Any special talents?

I’m good at arts, actually. Like, I can’t really draw (though I think I may have a predisposition, I never actually gave a damn about trying to practice, since patience is not my strong suit) but I am a master at making cards, gift wrapping, scrapbooking - just that sort of stuff, I enjoy it and I’m pretty good at it.

9. Where were you born?

Poland.

10. What are your hobbies?

Writing, traveling, reading, board games, karaoke. Shut up, karaoke counts.

11. Do you have any pets?

Not anymore, though they were always my brother's pets before. I am not an animal person.

12. What sports do you play/have you played?

Sports? Ew.

13. How tall are you?

170cm (5 ft 7″) Which apparently means I’m same height as Gamora, Okoye and Carol so HELL YEAH, IT’S A GOOD CLUB. (Also Spidey!)

14. Favorite subject in school?

MATHS. God, I miss maths.

15. Dream job?

Honestly at this point I think I’m pretty sure it’s in media. I am not 100% sure where, but in creative industry for sure.

My dream dream job is film director or film producer and I really wish I may be able to go into Łódź film school for film production after my MA (hopefully maybe who knows) but it’s not a very tangible dream? It’s not something I put solid plans for.

As for what I wish I get to do after uni with pretty realistic hopes, I’d say radio or written journalism in the field of culture and popculture. I have worked as a correspondent accredited at film festival before and it was AMAZING.

Tagging: @mistyflame1 @seelezeit @hiyamanico @fatestartsanew @tonystanktheirondad and anyone else who wants to do this.

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margridarnauds · 5 years

Note

6, 7, 10, 21, 23

THANKS AVERY

6. Answered here

7. List your NoTPs from each fandom you’ve been in.

Let’s have the SALT. (Mandatory disclaimer that my own personal feelings towards the SHIP does not inherently extend to the shippers, that I ship many dynamics that some people would call “abusive” given the ongoing debate over what “enemies to lovers” means, and that some dynamics here are things that I might have shipped under other circumstances, but things just...didn’t work out that way.)

Cats - I hated Plato/Victoria before I even knew that it was POSSIBLE to hate a ship that much. I always went with the Plato = Macavity theory to get that little skeavy dudebro off my girl. (Also, I’ll be honest, the whole “mating dance” thing is...such a fucking weird sequence anyway. Like, my ship preferences aside, ALW WHY DID YOU HAVE TO HAVE A SCENE WHERE THE CATS FUCK?)

Pirates of the Caribbean - Jack Sparrow/Elizabeth.

Harry Potter - Ron/Hermione. I never saw it, tbh, and they seemed to be pretty bad for one another, even in the books. The films just took it up several notches.

OUAT - Captain motherfucking Swan. I hated that smug, greasy little motherfucker so much. So much.

Star Trek Ds9: Jadzia/Worf. THERE. I SAID IT. Both sides brought out the absolute worst in each other, leading to an absolute trashfire of a ship that obliterated all in its wake. AND THEN WE HAD TO DEAL WITH THE FALLOUT OF THAT. EVEN AFTER THE SHIP WAS *DEAD*. Don’t mind me, don’t mind me. I’m cool, I’m cool.

Carmilla - Tbh...Laferry. Never my thing. I know that her character development’s a BIG part of Perry’s arc and I fully embrace character growth, but it just. Left a bad taste in my mouth. And the way shippers used to treat Laflashdrive shippers back in the day. As if shipping a nonbinary character and a flashdrive somehow makes it hetero. (#LetLafBeaRobotfucker2k19).

Les Miserables - You know what? While I’m on the Salt Train...

Enjolras/Grantaire. Now, there are plenty of ships that are probably more deeply annoying to me, but none are as prevalent as this one. And I might like them a lot more if they WEREN’T so prevalent. But as it is, it’s like a black HOLE that’s devoured the fandom, so that you’d think the entire fucking novel/musical is about these two. And. Maybe I shouldn’t talk given what I ship, but it isn’t even like they’re THEM at this point, they’re just two generic white guys in an “uwu” relationship. And I’m not speaking for EVERY single thing given that I have neither the time, concentration, or will to read every. Single. Thing. Made about these two, but it’s something I’ve noticed, though I’m not saying that I haven’t enjoyed SOME things made about them and the whole “You believe in nothing.” “I believe in you” is...good content.

It’s like...you’re walking in the woods (there’s no one around and your phone is dead) and you see a brightly colored pink tree. At first, it’s great. A pink tree! You’ve never seen one of those before. You wander further into the woods, and there’s another! And another! And soon enough, you’re surrounded by pink trees, in a technicolored horror realm. Where’s the sky? Where did you come in at? You think you remember seeing the sun once, but NO, it’s another fucking pink tree blocking your way. There is no God, there is no ground, there is only a technicolored nightmare blocking your every move, drowning you in visions of Barbie-esque horror.

Terra Nova - Skye/Lucas. WHY GOD WHY? Look, we KNOW I have terrible taste in ships, some of which have...questionable dynamics. BUT EVEN I CAN’T GET INTO THIS ONE. There’s no...mutual spark between the two of them, just Lucas creeping on Skye and Skye trying to get away. Also, since I’m here...Skye is estimate to have been born in ‘32-33, making her approximately 16-17 by the time the plot kicks into gear. Let’s be very generous and bump her into 17-18. Lucas? 2124, making him...oh, 25. Not the WORST age gap I’ve ever seen in my lifetime...but....questionable. Very questionable. And I know the series wants to have us believe that people grow up faster (see: The fact they actually think Maddy’s old enough to GET MARRIED. TO A SOLDIER. WHO IS REALISTICALLY IN DANGER OF MAKING HER A WIDOW,) but NO. Like, at my CURRENT AGE, with less than four years separating me from that age gap, I can’t see it. That is still at least 7 years of experience in the “real world” that she doesn’t have. He still saw someone with THAT MUCH of an age gap with him and WANTED something, whether or not she wanted it or not, and tried to PURSUE that something while calling her “sister”. Like, I can’t stop anyone from shipping it and I have a firm “ship and let ship” mentality, but....EW. EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWeWEEWEWEW.

B5 - I’m in the same boat as you as far as...on one hand. Byron/Lyta makes me want to vomit, but also...our Teep OC does owe her existence to her weird, hetero white goth uncle.

Star Wars: Han/Leia. Because, as we all know, cornering a woman before you kiss her is the love story of the generation. Han would have been better with Luke and Leia with Holdo.

The Pirate Queen - Tiernan/Gráinne. I. Hate. This. Ship.

His Dark Materials - Torn between Ruta Skadi/Asriel and Lyra/Will. Tbh, leaning towards the latter because while the former is AWFUL and signifies the quite frankly terrible writing decisions that distinguish the second and third books, at least it didn’t involve a badass, feral girl child becoming a dainty, submissive 50s housewife in the body of a 12 year old. “Oh, Will, I’ll do whatever you say, I promise. I won’t use my awesome powers unless you say I can, you’re so fantastic, Will.” Gag me. Also...they’re twelve. This doesn’t HAVE to be an epic, tragic romance, and the fact that their “kiss” (WHAT THE FUCK PULLMAN, WHAT THE FUCK, I’M NOT A PURITAN BUT WHAT THE FUCK) is the key to saving the universe? Really? Basically, they should have been friends.

1789 - Danton/Solène. (I KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT I WOULD SAY, BUT NO. MY HATRED FOR THIS ONE MANAGES TO OUTSHINE IT.) “But Rachel,” you might say, “You’ve been very, very open about preferring anything to Ronan/Olympe” and that’s TRUE. But the Toho version managed to push my hatred of this one with The Scene, AKA “Go back to the kitchen, Solène and let the menfolk take care of this.” The French version didn’t even really have it as A Thing, he was just a customer. And the amount of time Danton spends with Solène is always directly proportional to the amount of spinal surgery she’s going to have. Now, I can’t exactly BLAME the two Japanese productions for doing what they did, because they have to appeal to a Japanese audience in the way they see fit. It’s an ADAPTATION of 1789, not a tour of it. But that doesn’t mean I have to LIKE it. And. Like. You know there’s no way THAT one’s going to end in a way that’s good for Solène. Either (1) he’ll set her aside for his family or (2) If they SOMEHOW stay together...the Reign of Terror’s looming.

Also: Danton/Charlotte. No. No. Just. No. There are so many reasons why. But no.

Ace Attorney - Maya/Nick. WHY SWEET MOTHER OF HETERONORMATIVITY WHY?

10. Is there a fandom you read fic from but don’t write in?

We’ve both discussed a lot about how...DIFFICULT it can be to write fic for something. There are a lot of things I love dearly but just don’t have it in me to write fic for. Ace Attorney is an obvious one, Mozart l’Opera Rock, Elisabeth (though I’m trying to work on that one), Les Miserables, Star Wars, Star Trek, B5....a ton more that I could mention but it would honestly take too much time. Words hard, reading still hard but slightly easier.

21. What was the first fanfic you ever wrote?

The first thing I ever wrote, when I was five years old, was (very heteronormative) fanfiction for The Stinky Cheese Man, where he finds The Stinky Cheese Woman, which now, of course, I recognize as my own attempt to write myself into a narrative from which I’d been excluded. Or something. I think my mom still has it buried someplace, lurking...

Also, @theocraindora at some point managed to get me to write at least one full Carmilla AU during the second season, when we both must have been about 17-18-ish, if my math’s not too dubious, and that was the first thing I ever actually finished for a long time, even though it didn’t ever meet my personal standards for publishing and is likely to stay buried. For awhile, at least.

23. Name a fic you’ve written that you’re especially fond of & explain why you like it.

Since I talked about PLP’s tragic backstory, time for something happier. Paradise Lost, which I’m actually pretty damn happy with because it was my first time working with something that’s not a historical piece, and it was honestly a treat working with Mira’s voice. I think that Mira really “clicked” for me as a character here. Like, “Yes, this is why she’s like this, this makes sense.” There are some times where you can really feel a character’s voice when you’re writing and you can get things out, and this was one of those very rare times for me. Not saying that it’s going to happen NEXT time, but this time, it was rather relaxing.

It was honestly one of the smoother writing experiences I had? Like, it only took me about a day or so, from when we exchanged PMs to publishing it, which is pretty impressive, all things considered. I’m still not tossing out doing anything more with this world in the future, tbh. That and Goosefic were probably two of the easiest to just...get out. (WHICH. 92 HITS. GOOSEFIC HAS 92 HITS. THAT IS INSANE FOR A ONE-SHOT IN A SMALL FANDOM. HOLY SHIT.)

(From your other ask!)

50. How did you get into reading and/or writing fanfiction?

I’ve been WRITING fanfiction since I could hold a pencil and make scribbles. When I was younger, I could write that kind of thing easily, the shame came later.

Finding out that fanfiction EXISTED...was probably when I was about 9-10 and found Balto x Harry Potter crossover fanfiction. Which. In hindsight. Was pretty horrible, but my young self was CAPTIVATED because Balto and Harry Potter? In the same universe? IT WAS LIKE MAGIC.

Astonishingly, I did not read M rated stuff until I was at least 15-16-ish. I kept myself remarkably sheltered and only looked into it when I became curious. And got over my weird hyper-religious phase.

When I was about 12-13, I started to toy with writing myself, writing my own OC crossovers for Phantom Manor (the gother, European version of Haunted Mansion that was my special interest for. Ages). Carmilla when I was 17-18 was one of the first things I wrote a full, complete Thing for, even if I never published anything for it. And from there, I’d try to write things for both The Pirate Queen and Dracula, though both projects proved to be too ambitious and I ended up cutting them off, tragically, but they gave me the confidence I needed to get into 1789, which I DID publish something for finally, on the day I was taking my GRE because. Well. I had something else I feared more than a flame.

51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!

I don’t know if this is one thing or five separate things in a trenchcoat, but here you go.

I love how we can explore things that could never be explored in canon, for one reason or another; I love that we have an experience that we can filter according to what WE want, including trigger warnings, which is honestly a godsend to me. We talk a lot about the transformative nature of fanfic, and it IS, but also, the level of empowerment that comes with being able to take back a narrative that says “hey, you’re not supposed to be in this narrative” or “You’ll like what we put out and you’ll stick with it” or “Well, if you don’t like it, create your own” and say “Okay, I will.” And, obviously the comments are lovely, having that kind of instant encouragement, and in the small fandoms in particular, it’s VITAL, but I also don’t feel like they’re inherently mandatory or that readers should feel FORCED. But I do love that, no matter what, something you write can connect with someone from the other side of the world. Like, people can argue all they want about fanfic being valid or not, but MOST people who want to be professional writers never get that. And when you stop and think about how we’ve been changing the narrative for as long as we’ve had oral stories, that this is how storytelling was ORIGINALLY done...that’s very humbling.

#janetcarter

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andrewuttaro · 5 years

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New Look Sabres: GM 66 - EDM - Numbers

Perhaps this game represents the Sabres season; at least from a standings point of view this game last night was what being a Sabres fan has felt like this season. Favorable numbers toward the start followed by an ugly decline that turns the math against you. The simplest stat in hockey is goals. In this game last night Buffalo had more of those up until the dying minutes of the second period. It ended 4-3 Edmonton. I went into this game giving some good thought to the Phil Housley criticism. I thought: You know what, this guy is in his first NHL coaching job and in spite of it being his job, you could say he still is wrapping his head around what he’s got. I was feeling very generous having those thoughts and if the game didn’t kill the good will I was trying to foster for Housley then his postgame comments did. He said his team played 55 minutes of great hockey. The other 5 were bad minutes. That would be a nice piece of analysis with a team that consistently plays well and beats the teams they should. This team does not, and that comment is stupid. The numbers that do not represent time are against those comments. Jack Eichel scored two goals in a loss. Linus Ullmark was hung out to dry as his defense let up the greater number of high danger shots. The Oilers outplayed the Sabres in every statistical category except the powerplay and shots on goal. You had me fooled, Phil! I was sitting happy halfway through this game looking at the next four to five games being winnable! Boy, am I fool! The numbers are clear. After having an 83% chance of making the playoffs at the start of December, the Sabres are now nine points out at the start of March having gone 34 games without back to back wins! The 2014-2015 Tank team that was designed to lose and drove me to watch the Rangers most of that season, that team only got as bad as 31 games in that category. This ain’t it, Phil. I don’t know who I want to replace him in any intelligent way but when he’s back behind the bench for the home opener in October I am will not be a happy camper about it. This game was the microcosm of this season and oh so appropriately that microcosm ends in a loss.

The game starts off with an unlucky shorthanded goal against when Connor McDavid and Leon Draisaitl teamed up for the latter’s 41st goal of the season. Edmonton maybe wasting Connor McDavid and will likely miss the playoffs this season but there are guys tearing it up there in spite of it all. I hate that Buffalo and Edmonton are still comparable in this way because on the very same powerplay Jack Eichel revives the home crowd with a tight net-front goal to draw the score even again at 1. If there is one big positive for the Sabres in this game it was a full display of Jack Eichel’s leadership. The rest of this first period is a vision of what we thought the Sabres would be in 2019 in 2015. Jack Eichel helping Montour get a great chance. Okposo getting a great chance. Sheary knocking at the door. Jeff Skinner was chopping at that net like a lumberjack because he wants to get Rocket Rickard trophy votes. Casey Mittelstadt broke through Mikko Koskinen with a point-blank blast at 13:19 into the first period. The primary assist on that was Scott Wilson who, only now gets his first NHL point of the season having missed the majority of it with a gruesome ankle injury sustained way back in Training Camp. The fun only continued when Jack Eichel made it 3-1 unassisted in a no-look smacker that earned his team a standing applause as they went to the locker room for the first intermission! The likes of Jeff Skinner, Rasmus Ristolainen and Evan Rodrigues all shined bright with beautiful chances in the second period too. While the pushback came in the second that lead remained into the second half of the middle frame and I began to foolishly let myself hope looking at the schedule. Oh what a fool I am.

Less than four minutes left in the second period the whole Sabres defense was caught puck watching when Zack Kassian got a McDavid assist on a one-timer snipe that made Ullmark look confused. It’s now 3-2 Oilers and the floodgates are opened. A puck squirted out of a battle on the wall to Darnell Nurse who wired it home for the equalizer. Credit where credit is due, Jeff Skinner starts taking shots from Ovi spots to try and get the lead back, but the Oiler kept pushing. Give me an intermission, PLEASE! The horn to end the period did not come soon enough and with a mere five seconds left in the second period Adam Larsson takes a shot on net from way out that trickles in past Ullmark. Evidently Kyle Brodziak tipped it in, and I have not seen Ullmark angrier than after that goal. Some folks I heard wanted a challenge for a kicking motion by Brodziak but gee, I just don’t have the energy to litigate shit like that when the Sabres are this bad. Boos came down and Carter Hutton replaced Ullmark in net for the third. A one goal deficit never looked so demoralizing for a team and the Sabres never looked like they were going to come back. Sure, like many times this season its been encouraging to just see the Sabres have legitimate rushes in on net; hell, Brandon Montour is worth the price just for his ability to pass the puck to the offense if nothing else. In spite of Jeff Skinner not getting the puck across the line behind the Edmonton netminder and Jason Pominville blocking his own tap in (?) the threat of a Sabres equalizer just never seemed real. It ended 4-3 Oil.

I legitimately had a moment last night where I sat down to write this reaction and for the first time this season doing that I just couldn’t. My wife and I were having a good night and I just said no for my own mental health. With 16 games left in this season the Sabres need to go 14-2 to legitimately have a chance to make the playoffs. Pardon my French: What the Fuck? I had to talk myself out of buying a Skinner jersey that probably wouldn’t fit me at this time in December we were all so into this team. They were gold at that point, the best team we’d seen since before the Harbor Center was built! Now I would rather watch MLS Review videos and blog about a soccer team that isn’t even playing this calendar year than watch this team take on clubs they should be beating by multiple goals! WHAT THE FUCK! So, let’s turn away from the frustrating team stats for the far less frustrating individual stats. Jeff Skinner sits at 36 goals 9 back of goal leader Alex Ovechkin. He probably doesn’t have the most goals by the end of this season but if he can get north of 40 and push near 50 in these last several games its going to do a lot for how we feel going into next season when he’s inevitable signs. He should get some MVP votes. Jack Eichel sits at 25 goals. He needs to reach 30. I say that because this season has been such an encouraging step forward for him that hitting the 30-goal mark needs to happen as a bookmark if nothing else. Casey Mittelstadt just hit 10 goals and sits at 21 points with his 11 assists. He’s probably not quite the Calder Trophy contender we thought he could be but that’s ok because he’ll be a great C2 real soon. His fellow rookie Rasmus Dahlin on the other hand should get the majority of the Calder Trophy votes in my bias opinion. Dahlin has more points than all but one rookie forward has. The lone guy ahead of him in that category, Elias Petterson, has cooled off a fair bit from the first part of the season in which he was destroying worlds with his goals. What Dahlin has done puts him in an elite company among rookie D-Men in this league already and that’s more special than anything Petterson has done. Rasmus Dahlin for Calder!

I hate pushing hard for individual awards because it feels so dirty against not making the playoffs. Then again, I still feel cheated that Artemi Panarin came in out of nowhere and stole it from Jack Eichel in 2016. Those however are the things I’ll cheer for to avoid the crushing gloom of what a missed opportunity season this has become. That and I eagerly await exit interviews to see how Jason Botterill and Phil Housley envision next season. There is an outside chance that changes Botts’ opinion of Housley prompting a coaching change, but the more likely and interesting outcome is the two of them hammering out a plan of Playoffs or bust. Their comments have grown a little bit conflicting in these late phases of the season in spite of that vote of confidence a couple weeks back. All this and the Amerks will go on a run. How many times have I mentioned that? Not enough, one more time: the Rochester Americans are going to probably win the division and make a deep playoff run. Like, comment and share this blog with your friends. The end of this Sabres season, for how disappointing the lack of a playoff berth will be, will be very interesting in terms of Front Office Palace intrigue. There will be a new Will for the playoffs in 2020 at that point and how this organization fixes to get there will be fun to watch. For now, we eagerly anticipate Jeff boy. Come on, Skin man, sign on the line!

Thanks for reading.

P.S. Columbus is my favorite non-Sabres Eastern Conference team to watch going into these last 15 games. They pushed all the chips in on a run this post-season and its not even for sure they make the playoffs right now.

#buffalo sabres #hockey #blog #nhl

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