#so I have less faith in him

[botanautical]

'We all yearn for the woods. That's why every fellow on this island wants to settle down near a tree - just one will do.'

#dazai osamu #bsd dazai #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd #bsd fanart #it's dazai day!! #i wish this insufferable fictional man weren't so beloved to me #but as somebody plagued by silly brain issues he is oddly comforting and makes me feel less alone #and bsd introduced me to actual dazai osamu whose writing is honestly groundbreaking to me and i've barely even scratched the surface #it's something about the confluence of humour and tragedy... the desire to exist to bring joy to others at the expense of one's own #i feel like asagiri imparted this notion well onto bsd dazai - i know a lot of people dislike dazai and question his motivations #but i have faith in him and believe he's pursuing good #anyway excuse the ramble! the caption is from dazai's short story 'monkey island'! thank you to my dear partner for finding it for me!! #i'm really very happy with how this piece turned out - i wanted to depict bsd dazai but really pay suitable homage to his namesake #it's been a while since i've had fun drawing but this one and other recent pieces this month have really brought me back into it #happy birthday dazai #botanautical

[orchid-n-petals]

So I've already shared parts of this on a discord server, but I have to scream about Ketheric Thorm on here as well. Obviously spoilers about the character under the cut! It's a long one.

The entirety of act 2 is about him, right? Jaheira, Shadowheart and numerous other NPCs shit on him for his fickle faith. First Selune, then Shar, then, as we meet him, Myrkul. You hear about his changes of faith on a whim, you hear that he's the person responsible for the shadow curse, he is painted as a villain, plain and simple.

You can figure it out pretty early on that Isobel was resurrected and that she is his daughter; the detail as well that he wants Isobel alive is so on the nose, it gives him away completely but there are still a few questions that remain unanswered, mainly about his faith.

And then you get to the mausoleum and the picture assembles; this entire tragedy, the death of hundreds if not thousands and the complete ruination of a landscape was all, ALL because you had this absolutely wrenched, heartbroken father who had lost everything and nobody answered his grief. He was left woefully alone, the Goddess whose daughter his daughter was involved with did nothing to save Isobel.

Imagine outliving your wife and your daughter. Imagine dedicating your life to fight the Lady of Loss, your Lady of Silver's enemy, and then be left so completely alone and in silence with your grief, with your loss. It's so, so poetic how and why he turned from Selune, and it's so understandable as well; he broke. His spirit completely broke. He couldn't deal with that void of having lost the only two important people in his life, seemingly undeservedly so. He was going mad with this and a lot of his ire was likely targeted at Aylin who, in his eye, represented Selune; she's literally her daughter, after all, and it was implied that even before the deaths of his family, he sort of saw Aylin courting Isobel as Selune taking his daughter from him, despite his service. This relationship was clearly not seen by him as a boon of "giving his daughter to the Moon-maiden".

His ways in the past clearly didn't spare him from tragedy and having to cope with it (which he clearly didn't, he snapped under the weight of his grief). He was clearly angry and unable to do anything, furious and helpless, which is a dangerous combination. A good part of his first change of heart must have been fuelled by a sense of revenge.

But then Shar didn't provide any balm to his aching heart either. If you read his letters in Grymforge and in act 2, he is so focused on enacting the will of Shar because he believes that healing lies in oblivion. Everything would be easier if he could just forget, if the damn world could just forget, if nothing was remembered because without Melodia and Isobel, nothing was worth remembering.

Then came Myrkul. Literally the only god who was not only able, but WILLING to give back his daughter to him. Imagine spending your all, EVERYTHING you have to serve two gods who would not give a single shit about the greatest suffering in your life. You were basically nothing, your loyalty didn't matter for shit, everything that was taken from you amounted to no recognition whatsoever: you should simply cope and seethe. Your grief will not simply go unanswered (which is not inherently antagonising) but ignored.

And then comes this supposedly evil entity who can alleviate your pain just like that, snap of a finger and it's a done deal.

I am so serious when I say that I believe Ketheric's main incentive was to extend Aylin's immortality to Isobel as well. You can read in her diary that she feels a taint after having came back, and there are things not even Selune can cleanse, but at this point, Ketheric doesn't care about Selune, vengeance is secondary if not tertiary, he's done that war during his Shar years and what did it give him? Literally nothing.

He doesn't even care about the fact that Isobel is still her cleric. He cares about the single most important fact: Isobel is back. Life is worth living again, there is something for him, and it was not Selune or Shar who gave it to him but Myrkul, and for this singular gift, he would raze the world for the Lord of Bones. Like people can clown on him for being disloyal but the man has the loyalty of a dog bonded to its owner.

He is powerful and is willing to go to insane lengths for crumbs. What is raising a single life for a god? Nothing. It has happened and it will happen again. But Ketheric will go to the ends of the earth to serve the single god who actually listened to him. The one god who didn't ignore him.

He knows that what he does is not the morally upright thing! He is so insanely self-aware that allying with Orin and Gortash and doing this entire plot with them only to then betray them is morally reprehensible at the best of times, he knows that people hate him, etc-etc. He was a Selunite at one point and he's not stupid. He just doesn't care; it could be literal Asmodeus and he wouldn't care as long as he got what he wanted, no matter the price.

He is probably the only one from the three of the chosen who has complete clarity over his situation, he almost sways (if you pass the check during his confrontation), he is not an inherently evil man blinded by power.

But he is inherently loyal to those deserving, and as of the story's standing, completely broken by his grief. In his eyes, at this point, the only one deserving loyalty is the one who actually listened to him. Isobel lives. It doesn't matter that she hates him, that his entire life has fallen apart, that literally nothing else that is good has come of it, because Isobel lives.

I don't think he regrets a single thing. His consciousness might tear at him at the end, but I believe he would do everything over again, exactly as he did, because in the end, his daughter was brought back. Because what would a grieving, broken parent give to bring back their child? Everything. Absolutely everything. And it's such a simply given answer, no second thoughts, no doubts.

Nobody can tell me that this man is fickle. Nobody. This man was willing to burn the world to the ground, create a Boudica destruction layer all by himself for the one single thing he wanted. For any God that would listen.

I don't know, I just have a lot of thoughts about his character.

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #ketheric thorm #and I also have a lot of thoughts of how Aylin foils him #I fully believe that he was in the right in the capacity that he switched around his gods when he was literally ignored despite his life's #work. despite all that he has given. I think it's reasonable to expect in the world of gods who actively meddle in mortal affairs on their #whims and make shit worse that in just one single case they would. idk. NOT expect one of their devotees to remain blindly loyal to them #after their prayers go unanswered. like yes; go and try your luck elsewhere because this devotion of yours is clearly being taken for #granted. you get NOTHING out of your worship. you can't even sleep well because your loved ones are dead and you are expected to just what? #deal with it on your own? and remain loyal? why? #some sense of 'honour'? #I really like this depiction of faith actually. I really like when clerics and paladins are given agency and critical thought that hey! #this is actually giving me nothing despite me dedicating my entire life to it! and I have only one of it so why not take it somewhere where #it's actually valued. you know. as a treat. #I *personally* much more prefer this depiction of a crisis of faith than what we got with Shadowheart or Lae'zel; their stories are very #interesting on their own but I think throwing yourself from one end to the other not because you actually have a goal that it could serve #but because you are desperate for a purpose #is a slightly less potent character narrative than having an actual goal yourself. not by much but by a little. #again #PERSONALLY

[purpleshadow-star]

It's Valentines Day but it's also Ash Wednesday so uhh... some headcanons about that second thing.

Tilda wasn't super religious, but she'd drag Aaron to church every so often when he was growing up

After Tilda, Aaron doesn't actively practice religion much, but he'll do some things like get ashes on Ash Wednesday and observe lent

Nicky and Renee go to get their ashes together every year with a silent Aaron grumpily tagging along

They go in the morning after morning work out, but before their classes start, so once afternoon practice is over, they all end up with just a smudge of black on their foreheads

After living with Aaron and Nicky and a few other Christian households over the years, Andrew has gotten into the habit of not eating meat on Fridays during lent

Abby is also Christian, but she doesn't go to Church much and gets her ashes at a separate time than the Foxes

During lent, Abby will sometimes invite the Foxes over to her house for a seafood dinner on Fridays

Abby doesn't usually give anything up for lent, but Renee, Nicky and Aaron do

The girls' last year before they graduate, Renee gives up sweets for lent, and Andrew makes sure to eat twice the amount of candy around her just to be annoying

Nicky gives up alcohol and complains at least five times a day (and almost gives in on some particularly hard nights), but he manages to make it to the end without giving in

Andrew suggests that Aaron give up Katelyn for lent during a joint session with Bee, and he is not amused

Aaron ends up giving up video games, and he complains about it just as much as Nicky complains about the alcohol, but he also makes it to the end without giving in

Andrew walks into practice on Ash Wednesday and tells Wymack in a deadpan voice that he gave up exy for lent so he can't play. Wymack knows Andrew doesn't observe lent and makes him change out with everyone else, but Neil cracks up at the incredulous look Wymack has for the second before he calls Andrew out on it and that makes the extra lap (that Andrew doesn't actually do) worth it to Andrew

Neil makes a joke about Andrew giving up ice cream even though he knows Andrew doesn't officially observe lent, and Andrew doesn't talk to him for five hours out of spite

#i only briefly mentioned it but i have FEELINGS bout aaron passively practicing religion #like he grew up with it and now he'll do some things but he doesnt actively go to church or pray regularly or anything #not me projecting onto aaron again lol #but i feel like nicky would also be more passive than renee but less passive than aaron bc luther was much more religious #i like to think nicky came to peace with his religion even after growing up the way he did and being sent to a religious conversation camp #so he doesnt go to church every sunday but he still has faith #that's my hc for him #i also like the idea of other religious people on the team who dont really call any attention to it so i picked abby for this instance #im very much projecting into some of these hcs oops #oh well #aftg #all for the game #nicky hemmick #renee walker #aaron minyard #abby winfield #the foxes #andrew minyard #neil josten #andreil #nora sakavic #the foxhole court #aftg hc #aftg headcanon #all for the game headcanon #all for the game hc #also in high school i def made a joke about giving up the sport i played for lent to my coach and he found it funny

[vvienne]

I literally woke up in the middle of the night like God will dark rise is so fucking screwed. The line that’s like. “Everyone wanted to kill the Dark King.” What’s the part where he looks at Violet helplessly, haunted, almost pleading for mercy? But of course he reveals nothing of substance to anyone. Elizabeth is too young to understand but the reader knows what “Her relationship with that boy was…unnatural” can mean. Tying him to bedposts? Failing to strangle him? What else? Never not even once seeing beyond a mythological identity Will himself didn’t know he had? What did he think was the reason? That he was just intrinsically hateful? Of course he says nothing. Of course Violet can’t trust him- he’s given her nothing as painfully real as what she’s given him. So he gives her the sword hoping at least he can die at the hands of someone he loved, but even that doesn’t work out - she gives the sword to a Visander still furious at SARCEAN. The pattern continues; no one looks at Will, who vomits when he realizes what’s happened to James, Will who is much of a liar and killer and sneak as Elizabeth accuses but nonetheless wants to be different. Even when he doesn’t remember his own past. There’s no way out for him that doesn’t hurt. Hope this obsession passes soon given the one and a half years of waiting required for book 3

#dark rise series #dark heir #rarely does a cliffhanger pain me so much #bc rarely am I ever THAT invested in a plot I am sad to say #nona the ninth was so cathartic in of itself I’m content marinating before alecto #BUT PACAT ONLY EVER GIVES EMOTIONAL CRUMBS #have any of these bitches ever known peace fr #maybe this is what reading princes gambit and not immediately having the follow up might’ve been like #honestly it’s possibly damen and Lauren just generally had less problems tho #more than his relationship even with James. will/Violet is perhaps the genuine source of like. I WISH HED GIVEN HER A REASON. #the narration that describes Violet as Will’s star in the night…….. like fuck fine #will can’t reach any level of genuine intimacy with James bc the mess of fraught noncon dynamics is this massive unspoken horrible thing #wills identity is personal w James in a way it is with no one else but James is so fucking oblivious of undercurrents it comes unbalanced #and will knows it. but (as far as we know) violet isn’t reborn has no history with sarcean the dark king she’s literallt just Some Guy #and that almost makes it worse???????? that they are so loyal to each other even as he’s keeping a massive secret? #they weren’t dated or destined to entangle the way will is w characters like James and Katherine #and I think that makes his rship with Violet possibly the realest and truest experience of trust and love will has ever had #like it’s nothing bro. truly she knows nothing about him other than his lies of omission and her faith in him goodness which may or may not #beiltimately justified. but that was probably as honest and close will ever got to anyone. and him to her.

[commsroom]

i think to really understand hera (and, by extension, her relationship with eiffel) you have to recognize that she values the same things he does. hera works harder than eiffel does because she has to, because more is riding on her doing her job, because the bare minimum she's allowed to get away with and not have everyone die horribly is... still kind of a lot of work, all of the time. and even then, she does the bare minimum when she can. she cuts corners she probably shouldn't. she hates drudge work. and she really hates being told what to do.

eiffel and hera are both prisoners on the hephaestus - and that they're the only two who really know they weren't given a choice is central to their bond as well - but, at the same time. eiffel both embodies and extends to hera a kind of freedom she wants very much. no one else has ever made room for her to goof off or wanted to talk to her about nothing, just wanted to hear her voice, just wanted to make her laugh. wanted to hang out with her and talk, just for a little while, even as he's falling asleep after days without rest.

that's what draws her to eiffel. "you hate rules as much as i do, don't you, doug?" because the first time she ever speaks to him, it's while he's clamoring around in the dark, clearly no idea what he's doing, not having paid attention to anything about the station or the mission or, of course, the rules. because she tells him about the contraband cigarettes floating out of his pocket and makes a point of keeping it a shared secret. she likes those things about him.

#wolf 359 #w359 #doug eiffel #hera wolf 359 #eiffera #i don't know. sometimes people want to girlbossify hera so bad #and she is very smart. and capable of so much. #but it's like. what cutter mistakes for ambition in hera is mostly just a desire to survive and be treated with basic respect #and she has to work a lot harder for that than other people do. and she shouldn't have to #and eiffel really does. create that space. in small ways but also #because he values her as a person and wants to be around her and her productivity could not be less important to him #this is why they need minkowski btw #in spirit eiffel and hera are minkowski's slacker roommates and she is begging both of them to get real jobs #also: #i still think a lot about hera only ever calling eiffel 'doug' when he can't hear her. and how #unlike with a lot of other characters. there's never a later moment where she calls him by his first name in a Meaningful Way #i have. some thoughts about that maybe. #i just. think about this a lot. how much eiffel and hera are a refuge for each other and how lucky that is #because i'm really not sure either of them would've made it without the comfort they offer each other and the faith they have in each other #nothing new but. they love each other very much and i love them

[infini-tree]

on the other hand i think the fact that they essentially gave mr. ping oogway's backstory (ie. old man with a shady past trying to do better) is kind of funny

#mells thinking out loud on her blog again #mells liveblogs kfp:tdk #the cage scenes except with po and oogway would kill me dead though! #because i think it would be lowkey devastating seeing po have his faith shattered by the literal inventor of kung fu #is so integral to him now. and so integral to many others too that i feel his objections would feel less like a rebellious teen and more... #reasonable? i guess? even if the point is that he's acting like an 'unreasonable teen' (they even make a joke about it) #the points po says i feel would fit better with oogway than ping lmao

[zukosdualdao]

people who hate zuko will list off things he did as a villain (or anti-hero, tbf) to try and convince other people they should hate him, also, and it’s like “???? yeah. i know. he for sure did all that stuff (edit: most of that stuff. people really do act like the narrative confirmed or implied things it never did.) and it was bad. the narrative treats it like it’s bad. other characters rightfully say those things are bad. he also then goes on to apologize, try to set things right and help people, and atone. that’s like. most of his character arc. that’s the whole narrative point of him.”

#people will also list things he did when he joined the gaang in book 3 to try to discredit his redemption #and most of those things are. taken wildly out of context and not said in good faith #i am willing to concede that like. ofc he’s not perfect by the end of the story! i don’t even want him to be! that would make him a less #interesting character! #but when people make the ‘people act like zuko’s so perfect and he’s not’ i’m just like….. you are inventing an argument i’ve seen very few #if any people make #there is a difference between liking and defending his redemption story and not liking when people talk about those things in bad faith #vs treating him as perfect #fandom critical #atla #zuko #ask to tag // #people don’t have to like zuko but sometimes it feels like people really just hate him bc he’s a popular character and that am #* and that makes it seem edgy and cool to hate him

[crusaderchinchilla]

i'm so sorry, i've been so inactive lately...! this time, the reason is not personal struggle/distress. i have been incredibly incredibly busy with studies, work, and life changes, but they are good changes! i am really doing better now, and i am so so thankful to the Lord; i am so happy that i finally feel myself growing closer to Him, and my love for Him grows every day

i wanted to really sincerely thank everyone who prayed for me or sent me nice messages after that vent i posted a while back, it means so very much to me. the ppl on here are so kind and lovely! <3 (also, i am not ignoring my asks- i'll respond as soon as i have the time to give thoughtful input!)

this blog is not abandoned and i will return to regularly scheduled Christposting sooner or later!

hope you are all doing wonderfully, mutuals, and God bless you all!

#talk tag #i feel like i have a lot to share regarding the developments in my faith (how much stronger it has gotten) #i havent looked at tumblr in a while bc i feel so stretched thin irl #but in a good way #like im convinced things are hard in a “God is putting you in this situation for a reason and you will learn and grow from it” way #i got out of some bad situations i used to be in and things are getting better all by His grace #and i trust Him to guide me to a place where things are less chaotic and more okay! #i am so glad my faith was “tested” for a bit cause i feel like you have to experience that as a Christian at some point in order to #actually notice and appreciate how subtly God works if that makes sense

[sesamenom]

some funny snippets of a tentative timeline for the reverse gondolin au

#silm #silmarillion #not art #reverse gondolin au #Gondolin-born Prince Elrond is a bit more active in numenorean politics #primarily attempting to keep them from self-destructing #numenor still Falls after sauron establishes his weird morgoth death cult #because having numenor around in the TA means there wouldn't be a war of the ring in the first place #but like 60% of them are still Faithful #they establish themselves in Imladris under Tar-Miriel & Elrond (Tar-hanotur? Tar-airatur?) btw #Prince Elrond is quite fascinating to write #also yes annatar is literally booted out under lomions advice #celebrimbor still struggles with his overly-trustingness #luckily for everyone lomion has no such reservations #lomion: tyelpe i know you dont trust yourself on this but. you trust me right #tyelpe: of course #lomion: okay then somethings up with that guy. get him out of your house asap #tyelpe: thanks will do #debating whether to kill off celebrimbor here? if he does die it would be in battle next to lomion so sauron doesnt learn of the Seven #also this tyelpe & lomion have been actively using the Three in battle since FA 500something #they're pretty experienced at the magical siege warfare stuff #so maybe celebrimbor makes it out alive but injured? #okay imagine a white council w assorted wizards; galadriel; cirdan; elrond; the numenorean king in imladris; lomion; and celebrimbor #i feel like lomion and tyelpe balance each other out well enough (lomion is still quite pragmatic but less actively distrusting than maegli #and tyelpe is constantly making an effort to be Wise and Understanding #he doesn't trust himself on big decisions bc of the whole feanorion baggage. but he does trust his bff lomion #so their dynamic is kind of like 'tyelpe has a Good Idea; lomion Validates his Good Conscience and figures out how to execute it' #btwn making the Three a few centuries ahead of schedule and them balancing each other out galadriel-and-celeborn-style they're kind of op #idk how sauron amasses that much power in the SA/TA of the au-verse

[unexpectedbrickattack]

talks about my own damn post in your inbox i guess but i think a good part of the bros' trusting peppino is like. pizzahead can so easily buy out or win over basically anyone who stands against him and peppino is like the ONE guy they knew for sure that wasn't gonna happen with. he might not have cared/known about their plight, but he also didn't seem to have any ulterior motives that would make their lives more hell if he got the treasures, so that was...really as much as they could ask for given the circumstances

I like the idea of this 🤔 Like maybe there were other people theyve seen immediately take the money, like randos but also some of the bosses. So their only hope was someone who wasnt going to be talked or bribed into leaving this tower alone. I can see ph still trying to buy his way into peppinos restaurant, even towards the end…like ouuuh…fat and rude italian man…i dont HAVE to explode this shop, i can just buy it 🥺🥺🥺 please let me buy it 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 pwease…..🥺 and peppino is so fucking determined to just smash everything into oblivion that that simply isnt an acceptable offer. Get ur ass beat. That is the only acceptable offer. And u know what? John will definitely put the small amount of faith he has in this man bc of it.

#answered #chattin #peppino #pillar bros #my thots are like… #gerome has loads more faith and optimism #and whatever hangups he had about peppino is immediately thrown away by the end of the first stage #whereas. i think of john w very little hope. afterall HE is the person falling apart at the seams. not gerome #and he would be a little offput that someone supposedly here to ‘save’ him is in it for his own reasons (reminds him of ph) #hes a lot more hopeful by the vigilante fight #and hes more or less patiently waiting for everything to come down by the final floor #(as opposed to waiting around; extremely hopeless and aimless) #and it is just so funny to me to have peppino be a hero in ANY way #he doesnt think of himself as one; and john certainly doesnt think of him as one #but he is exactly what they needed; a middle aged man swimmin in so much debt #that they would risk going into this fucking tower and kill themselves bc they only have one thing to lose #and its this fucking shop ph is threatening to obliterate #john just sittin there like. huh. i guess it makes sense. who else would be stupid enough to come here?? #‘pizzahead.’ ‘well u are not wrong about that’

[takkamek]

merc signing a rookie for their 2025 seat is more insane to me than hearing "hamilton to ferrari" a week ago

#f1 #gr has experience but theres no way they'd get someone w less experience than him #unless they're like fuck it we ball. and have huge faith in someone #alonso i dont see it. he seems to be committed to am and i havent heard anything #that could mean he's open to leaving (unless it's about El plan) #sainz i dont see it unless merc is genuinely stupid. gr and cs would not get along as teammates lbr #also sainz to rbr is also not happening for many reasons #but idk lewis' coming to ferrari so. anything can happen in this unserious sport

[mymp3]

trailer talk

#compendiumnotebook #i probably articulated a lot of my trailer thoughts better to my mutuals and friends i was dming the other day #but the tldr of it is that im kind of disappointed they only seem to be adapting mostly movie and portable stuff #not that i hate hate portable or hate hate the movies #but saying that this is going to be a faithful remake of base 3 and having only portable events and options available + adding movie stuff #feels like a big slap in the face to fes and manga enjoyers. and dont get me started on the hammy lovers. #and also is just straight up incorrect. wish they would say what they're adapting rather than saying its a faithful remake #damn im so sorry yall. especially because if they wanted to do a portable adaptation she should be here. #even if im not her number 1 fan i get how dirty it feels #but tbh i am leaning more towards femc as dlc rather than the answer as dlc now #bc atp it just seems like they take fes for granted and brush it off #bc its not as popular #just feels kind of mean a bit #“manga and fes are there. but portable and movies seem to be popular so we can do more of that!” #minato being able to work a job is something i dont like. he's constantly overworked in every other department of his life. #now hes gotta work too? #it seems like this hero is less chronically ill tired angry and like theyre trying to give him more energy and “wipe away his wrongs”. #iddkkkkkk #im sure I'll warm up to it in game #and find a way to work this into my reading #but for now those are my thoughts #oh! i like his mp3 player saying hi to him. thats precious.

[echojedis]

One day I’m going to write out my entire essay of tech/phee thoughts but I don’t want anything I say to be misunderstood 

#i answered an ask a while ago where i talked about how having the sunset moment on pabu come after she pushed his boundaries too far #might have made that scene feel less uncomfortable. showing her messing up but learning from it and making an effort to understand him #i have similar thoughts on them as i do on tech coming back tbh #i want and like it and i can see how the writers can make it work in a way that makes the season 2 finale feel worth it #but i can also see all the many ways they can mess it up #i don’t really see any way the writers could justify having phee so clearly push him too far if it isn’t to set up her learning #to understand him? why have him struggle to speak and make eye contact after they seemed to get along so well #why make those purposeful decisions for no reason? maybe i have too much faith in the writers lol they did completely drop #crosshair’s chip #it all depends what happens in season 3 and/or if there’s going to be a continuation or spinoff #but on the other hand phee is too good of a character to just be a love interest and it wouldn’t be great to see her whole arc being #about understanding a love interest. where is our phee spin off about her fun solo adventures! she’s space indiana jones #ugh idk if any of this is coming off like i want it to it’s late

[gammija]

ive been trying for 30 mins to write a post about why the Web's plan is still confusing, but I think I should face the truth and admit to myself that it's not that it makes no sense, it's just... so convoluted

#they needed jon to kill jonah cause it seems like only he could call him down #and they couldnt go through with the original plan because.... tbh still not sure on that one. at least not with the reasoning annabelle #gives. assuming that how everything works out now is how they intended it to #which it must be because if jon was ever ever going to consider 'letting anyone else feel that guilt' he sure as hell wasn't now that he #got introduced to the plan while a giant spider dangled his boyfriend above a pit. not conducive to jon cooperation #so originally spidermartin would have driven him to burn the archives and kill jonah. but theyre bond is too strong now so even if martin #would be spiders Jon wouldnt do the plan. .... huh #i just dont get that leap #why does their bond being stronger make jon less willing to burn it all down. so to say #would he want to keep his promise to martin and not become the pupil? but he did! he does! he does even when martin ISNT spiders! aaah #one thing that could make everything more elegant is if Annabelle wasnt telling the whole truth. she says they need to kill 'the pupil' #jon has been described as 'the pupil' as early as s2. and why would the Fears follow his voice on the tapes #and not just stick with his voice in jon the person? #solution; not only does the pupil have to die and the archives burn down at the same time #but jon has to be the pupil when it happens #... except that ALSO doesnt work because according to Jon Annabelle wasnt lying when she said that this would allow them both to 'survive'! #so unless we read the transcript in very bad faith and assume that she was talking about the hypothetical scenario of íf the fears leave; #then youll live; (but for them to leave youll have to die) this solution is out as well #but it would mean theyd need martin unspidered because hed be the only person able to kill jon when hes the pupil because 'it feels right' #(throwback to 178) #tma #tma meta #joos yaps #delete later #a mag a day #tma s5 #one nearly incoherent ramble later..... #if anyone has a good Watsonian solution to tie everything up neatly plz link me to a post

[larsnicklas]

all this talk about pete having to work his way out of his funk and no one ever mentioning you can’t just will your way out of a long term wrist injury 🤨

#sorry to be a conspiracy theorist but that thing has been nagging at him all year i’d bet my life on it #even if he’d never say so lol #it’s affecting the way he plays (less shot volume; lower shot quality) and he’s compensating for it which contributes to the overthinking #but yeah i have just a lot of faith in him he WILL be fine but i wouldn’t be surprised if this summer he took time to handle this #meg.txtpost

[bagheerita]

In "Faith" Eli and Camile debate the believability of technology that can create a star vs technology that can teleport them across the universe, but what I want to learn more about is the technology that lets Chole's hair still look like that after a month of living on the planet.

#eternal stargate rewatch #stargate universe #stargate universe faith #you know the first time through this series I had so much sympathy for TJ but this time I'm just like... girl you made those choices. #i feel like i have more understanding of young but i still do not see anything in him that helps me understand why tj would sleep with him #much less be in love with him.