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flowercrowngods · 11 months

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hello i’m attempting something for steddie week too, but it'll be one large thing probably @steddie-week

day 01: pining

2 new messages

eddie The Problem munson: —steeb —esteban —stefano —stevie —love of my life apple of my eye pls pls tell me i can call you —i am very chill etc etc —no i’m not —let me call youuuu —😠🥺🙏

Steve snorts as he picks up his phone and reads Eddie’s messages that keep coming in his usual spam of consciousness, a giddy feeling spreading in his chest as he snorts and goes to answer.

— Call me then, coward

Not a second later, his phone rings. Steve picks up immediately, even though he considers making Eddie wait; just to be difficult. Just to calm his racing heart that is always so lively around Eddie.

“What,” he says, attempting to sound bored and annoyed — in vain, because even he can hear the smile on his face. Traitor, he thinks to himself.

“Steve,” Eddie sing-songs, drawing out Steve’s name like he does every time he’s happy. “Steve, Steve, Stevie.”

“Ed, Ed, Eddie,” he sings back, relaxing into his couch and shutting the laptop. Lesson planning can wait, he decides, shuffling all the loose pages into the text book and placing his laptop on the pile, trusting that physics won’t betray him. “What’s got you so happy, hm?”

“Why do you think I’m happy?” Damn idiot has a smile on his face as he asks that, Steve can hear it. It makes his own grin widen and he huffs into the phone.

“I literally know you, babe.”

Babe. His heart flutters every time he says it — and he tries not to, because it’s meaningless, it’ll never happen. But Eddie picks it back up every time, and Steve is weak. God, he is so, so weak.

On the other end, Eddie hums and Steve basks in the sound for a moment. It’s always so contagious, Eddie’s happiness, and he wants to soak it all up. Wants to be the reason for it. Wants, wants, wants.

“You do,” Eddie says, his voice so light and fond it makes Steve’s whole body tingle. And his heart flutter. And it fills him with such happiness that he feels like he could take on the entire world right now, just with the way Eddie’s voice went all soft on him.

God, he’s hopeless. So, so hopeless. But he’s also weak. An addict, leeching off Eddie’s attention, getting a kick out of the smallest dose, and absolutely certain he couldn’t survive if it were taken from him. He needs it. Even if it kills him a little bit, because—

“She said yes.”

Steve blinks. “Huh?”

“Chrissy. She said— She said yes, Stevie. We’re getting married.”

He says it and he sounds so happy. So, so happy. And Steve is the world’s worst best friend for the way he freezes, the way he almost drops his phone if it weren’t for the vice grip he has on it, frozen in time and space because his heart has stopped beating. It has stopped, surely, because no beating heart can hurt this much. No beating heart can crack open and still work the way it used to three, five, seven seconds ago.

Eddie, bless his entire soul, laughs to fill the silence, and it’s the happiest sound. A boyish one, like there is no pain in the world and not a worry on his mind. A bit hysterical, too. Like he can’t believe it himself yet. Like this is the best day of his life and saying it again has reminded him of it. At least that’s what Steve imagines it feels like when someone wants to be married to you. He wouldn’t know, of course, as the only person he would ever ask is already engaged to someone else. Apparently.

Eddie is engaged.

Engaged and laughing and so, so happy.

And Steve feels nauseous. Dizzy. Breathless. His eyes begin to sting and the hand that’s holding his phone begins to tremble, his grip so tight it hurts.

Steve feels… too much. His hands tremble and he tries hard not to cry.

“You’re getting married.”

“We’re getting married.”

They’re getting married.

Fuck.

Someone has to tell Robin. Because in true Platonic Soulmate manner, Steve and Robin fell in love with the two people who are in love with each other. Like the chaotic mess they are.

“Sorry I didn’t tell you about it sooner,” Eddie continues, a bit more sober now. Sounding genuine and sufficiently awkward about it, in true Eddie-manner. Like the big old softie he secretly is. “I would have, but…”

But I know you’re in love with me and didn’t want to burden you with the love I carry for someone who isn’t you, Steve’s brain auto-fills helpfully. But you keep flirting with me and there was never room for someone else when I was with you.

But, but, but—

He swallows and drags in a deep breath past the pain in his throat where all the words he can never say are forming a massive lump.

“Hey man, don’t worry about that, we all know I suck at keeping secrets,” he offers. And it’s a lie, because he has kept this one thing secret for years and years. This one thing, this huge and all-encompassing thing that he can feel in the tips of his fingers when he is texting Eddie, and on his tongue when they are talking, and in his heart even when he is sleeping.

This one thing, this one secret, is his never-ending love for Eddie.

And he will add another one to that, a lovely little friend for it. To keep it company. That other secret, of course, will be the way his heart has shattered into a million little pieces and will remain that way until he can’t even look at Eddie anymore. And even then will he look at Eddie and smile at him, and Eddie will smile back and the pain will flare up again.

Again and again and again, for the rest of their lives. Possibly even beyond that.

“You do suck at that,” Eddie chuckles, though it is quieter this time, almost private. Fond. Gentle. Always, always like that. It used to mean something once. And if Steve closes his eyes, he can imagine that Eddie smiles his secret smile, the one Steve has only seen directed at himself. It almost breaks him.

Eddie’s I have known you for a whole eternity and love you beyond words, silly, but you also make my life so much harder-smile. That’s what he has dubbed it because that is what Eddie had said the first time he smiled like that when Steve was drunk off his ass.

But. But, but, but—

It’s no use to think of that now, to reminisce and imagine what might have been if… Well. If Steve weren’t Steve.

And that sure is a dark path he doesn’t want to trudge now, not in the face of the even darker path of Eddie getting married that he sure as hell will have to walk down for the rest of his life.

He sighs and tries to think of something to say. Something good. Something that is not Please don’t marry Chrissy. Please don’t take yourself away from me. Please. Please don’t get married to anyone who isn’t me. Please open your eyes and see me, please listen to me, please understand what I say when I say I love you. Please.

He kind of spaces out for the rest of the conversation, not really listening to Eddie’s words over the ringing in his ears and the pumping beat of his shattered heart.

Eddie speaks softly to him, the undercurrent of happiness and contentment still in his voice, and it would give Steve life, it would be contagious, it would be so very precious if it didn’t also drive the knife of pain ever deeper into Steve’s entire soul, slicing him apart with no one around to put him back together again.

Splitting him in half. One half that just wants Eddie to be happy, to sound like he does right now for ever and ever. And the other half, loathing that Eddie’s happiness is not inspired by him, not because of him, not in any sort of relation to him.

It’s not fair. And Steve is torn. So he shuts himself off and lets Eddie ramble, tells him that he is tired after pulling an all-nighter again and wrangling the his difficult seventh graders that were particularly hard on him today when the other man asks him if he is all right.

“Steve,” Eddie sighs, and a traitorous tear rolls down Steve’s cheek at the caring exasperation he hears there. “How often do I need to tell you that sleep is important? You’re gonna wear yourself out at this rate. And the kids just suck.”

“I know,” he says, and sniffs, willing the tears to not fall. Not until Eddie has hung up on him.

“Aww. That emotional, huh?”

At that, Steve sobs out a laugh and gladly accepts the way out. “Well, excuse me, my bestest friend whom I love very much is getting married soon! Or, well, I hope it’s soon, nobody has time for all that suspense. Anyway, I am allowed to be emotional about this!”

Eddie chuckles again and sighs gently. “Yes, you are. I’m glad you are. Thank you, Stevie.”

Don’t thank me. Not for this. Not over this, please, don’t thank me.

“Don’t thank me,” he says with a grin, and it hurts his cheeks from how forced it is. “Thank yourself for being brave enough to actually go through with the proposal! We both know you’re chicken shit.”

Just like me, he thinks. Just like me.

They laugh and it sounds hollow to Steve’s ears. He just wants the phone call to end, wants this to be over with. Wants them to not get married. Never, ever, in this life or the next.

He wants… he wants Robin. No, he needs his best friend, his soulmate. He can’t cry alone, not about this.

Eventually, Eddie hangs up, that smile still so audibly his lips, and that painful happiness still very clear in his voice. Steve wants to share it. But he can’t.

All he can do is stare at the phone in his trembling hand before he closes his eyes and lets himself cry, his head falling back against the couch until he slumps over to one side. He stares and he cries until he can’t anymore.

Eddie. The love of his life. Is getting married. To Chrissy, the other, platonic love of his life, who is like a sister to him. Who, coincidentally, is the love of his real platonic soulmate’s life.

Fucking hell, the mess they find themselves in!

After a while of pitifully staring at the wall, all cried out and feeling thoroughly pathetic, he lifts his phone and speed-dials Robin.

“Stevie?”

He sniffs, and it must sound as awful as he feels, for her next words are, “I’ll be right there. Alcohol or ice cream?”

“Both?” he whimpers after a moment, and Robin hums right back.

“I’ve got you. I’ll be there in ten.”

She hangs up before he can say anything more, and he is overcome with all the love he holds for her.

As he waits for her to come over, he does not move from the awkwardly half curled-up position on his couch, the lesson plans for tomorrow forgotten completely. This is his life now. His Eddie-less life. His engaged-Eddie life. His loveless, hopeless, endlessly pitiful life.

come back tomorrow for: bittersweet & angst | read here

#steddieweek2023 #steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #dio words #listen idk if this'll be a whole thing but I hope it will (but also I've written almost the exact same premise for the Witcher once before #so if you feel like this is too familiar I swear I am not plagiarising this is just me again with a hallmark typcial trope dont yell at me #please 🤍#it’s technically not day one for me bc it’s 3:42am but eh

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may8elle · 11 days

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Other Hades II screenshots from SuperGiant's livestream ; ( one , two , three , four , five , six )

#hades #hades ii #hades 2 #hades ii spoilers #hades 2 spoilers #hades ii technical test #hades 2 technical test #hephaestus #moros #hecate #melinoe #this is the last one i swear

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0-dear-rose-0 · 2 months

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gildedlead · 4 months

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Love the canon fact that Duke’s favorite band is a metal group made out of Arkham prisoners. And it’s called Batman’s Bitch. I want him to bump his shit mid-flight and annoy everyone on comms. It’s the same effect as calling your friend and hearing the Doom soundtrack blast through the line.

#technically we don’t know if the band is actually called batmans bitch #cause the second half of the name is cartoon swearing #but batmans bitch just rolls off the tongue #….#batmans bussy?#is that something #duke thomas #the signal #chatterbox behavior

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svtskneecaps · 11 months

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dude i fucking love how this server has communication as its premise and built into its fucking core. i fucking love that. bc it's one thing to be like 'this server is about multilingual communication and cultural exchange!!' bc that could present in any NUMBER of ways but like. with the federation and the eggs and a common shared goal they all decided WE ARE A TEAM. and like, ok,

when baghera was sus of jaiden because of the thing when pomme died and jaiden had been the reason baghera left her side for the only time that day, i wasn't even worried. i wasn't worried bc i was like "we just wait. because i know they will TALK TO EACH OTHER." and I WAS RIGHT. TWO DAYS LATER IT WAS ALL CLEARED UP AND BAGHERA WAS HELPING HER OUT WITH CUCURUCHO

and the ordo theoritas is functionally a secret organization. it would be SO EASY to gatekeep the lore, on grounds of "the federation is always watching and anyone could be a spy" and yet the ordo theoritas says that, like bad SAYS THAT, says OUT LOUD, "anyone could be a traitor" and then turns around and goes "hey person i've had a few days' worth of conversations with, here's a detailed rundown of everything we've learned about the island's mysteries, and the secret location of the ordo base". SOFIA was supposed to be secret from everyone, and for a little bit she was. but now like, the ordo theoritas is showing her to everyone. it would be SO EASY to hide things and to gatekeep things but they just. don't do it. here's the supercomputer!!!! don't forget to grab her waystone so you can come back anytime!!!

bad learns something. "i need to tell forever/cellbit/baghera". forever figures out a new way to protect the eggs, and he gets it to everyone within days. cucurucho tries to have a secret conversation and the entire server knows about it almost instantly and there are three people buried in the walls reading the subtitles and giving each other meaningful glances

i love it. i love it. miscommunication plotlines drive me up the fucking wall and the fact that i wasn't even SCARED when jaiden and baghera could easily have angled into an angsty tangled web of that and instead just MET WITH EACH OTHER AND EXPLAINED EVERYTHING AND CLEARED THE AIR ALMOST IMMEDIATELY was so fucking breathtaking. and this is a multilingual server. this is a MULTILINGUAL SERVER. i love it. i love it so much i want to cry. it's a server for communication and people Communicate, it would have been SO EASY to slip into monolingual factions and stick to the familiar but they DIDN'T. they DIDN'T. WE GET TO HAVE A THEORY TABLE WITH SO MANY LANGUAGES SITTING AROUND IT. we get to have conspiracy walls in every language!!!! idk sometimes i forget how fucking CRAZY all this is, like the scale of what they've accomplished

so yea thank you to quackity and the qsmp admins for this, and thank you to the streamers for hearing 'this is about connections' and taking it ENTIRELY to heart, and also thank you to whoever the fuck decided to give quackity's school class the job to look after a fucking egg to learn about parenting. bc holy shit. holy shit.

#qsmp #this is a mess but i keep marvelling at it ever since jaiden's streams #just that. it could have gone to hell. but they TALKED TO EACH OTHER.#and i kept seeing people on tumblr like 'nooo they're dividing them 😭' and i kept thinking in my head:#'it's ok. don't panic. don't worry. they're so good about communicating: roier will say something or jaiden will say something'#'and they'll resolve anything right there and then'#i fucking love it. i fucking love it. there have been cross lingual projects before that didn't breed community like this does #everyone is trying so hard to protect everyone. forever and baghera didn't even trust quackity and they were still trying to protect him #i can't express how much this silly fucking server means to me. i can't explain it #its so good. its so good. i love it so much i swear to god #like i promise you if some of the less active members were to step back online and ask about the lore #they'd get a FULL fuckin rundown of it even though the ordo theoritas is technically a secret society #just immediately #i love it. there may be gaslighting and girlbossing but there is NO gatekeeping #unless we count the french exp farm lmfao #idk idk idk!!!!! it means so much to me i swearrrrrrr #THEY'RE A TEAM YOUR HONOR. THEY!! ARE!!! A TEAM!!!#shut up vic #block game brainrot

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prokopetz · 4 months

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Being technical writer and layout editor on the same project is great because you get to confront fun questions like "in order to avoid having a page break fall mid-table, do I a. try to re-word this sentence without loss of clarity for the sixth fucking time in order to shave off another couple of characters worth of horizontal space; b. fuck with the letter spacing and just deal with the fact that exactly one line on the entire page is going to be laid out visibly tighter than the ones preceding and following it and thus stick out like a sore thumb; or c. fuck with the default able metrics for the entire document in order to prevent this situation from arising in the first place and commit myself to re-doing my most recent QA pass on every other table in the book in case I just broke something else?"

#life #work #editing #technical writing #gaming #tabletop roleplaying #tabletop rpgs #game design #swearing

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powdermelonkeg · 2 months

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See that saultry little binch on the bottom lsft?

This one?

Senshi you mad lad you have tricked me into balancing my meals in a way I understand.

#this and the manga repeatedly showing balanced meals and explaining things #without beating over your head protagonist-style that 'ah because i had that omelette i now have the strength to kill this mimic!'#has made planning meals actually something I default into putting thought into #i binged the manga in ONE DAY #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #swearing tw #<- technically

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comradekatara · 3 months

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very sinister to me whenever i see posts that are like “it’s so cute/romantic how zuko is a dick to every member of the gaang except for [the one op happens to ship him with]!” first of all, the notion that “a troubled guy who is rude to everyone but you” is somehow a sweet romantic ideal is just eminently problematic. no one should want a boyfriend (or girlfriend, or partner of any kind) who is an asshole to all your friends and loved ones and everyone they’ve ever met, even if they’re the sweetest kindest cuddliest person when you’re alone. that’s just an obvious red flag. but also, it’s not even true?? zuko treats every member of the gaang like shit at some point during the latter half of book 3, even if he is also (somewhat) nice to them at other points. he yells at katara about “how unfair it is that she doesn’t trust him yet” (it’s not. it’s totally deserved), he brusquely dismisses toph’s feelings when she tries to open up to him about her childhood trauma, he basically mocks and belittles aang for clinging to the remnants of his culture that zuko’s direct forefathers literally wiped off the planet (which he does in multiple episodes, btw), he exploits sokka’s photographic memory for his own ends after interrupting his date to force him to recount one of the most traumatic days of his entire life like sokka is just there to be his genius butler or something, and he mostly just seems to pretend that suki doesn’t even exist. this also goes for every other character btw, including mai, ty lee, jin, song, jet, or whomever else you may ship him with. the only character zuko is consistently nice to is that kid lee from “zuko alone,” bc he’s healing his inner child or whatever. so romanticize the fact that zuko is inexplicably good with kids all you want, but when it comes to dating, i actually think zuko should take a vow of abstinence for at least the next decade or so.

#zuko #hot takes #okay….. listen……#I SWEAR I don’t hate zuko #it feels like all my posts abt him lately are just tearing into the poor guy ruthlessly #but I’m not a zuko hater!!!! that is my son actually #it just bothers me (a lot) how much ppl are willing to whitewash him for whatever personal agenda they may have #so it’s not that I don’t love zuko #it’s just that I don’t love zuko MORE than I love the other characters #the selective memory and defensiveness when it comes to zuko fans is just. astounding. like cmon now #also I do believe in volcel zuko like I am dead srs abt that #technically it’s more nuanced than that but like. that’s truly the gist of it #hashtag free mai hashtag let my girl live #etc etc

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