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#that so many people in *my* community hate me. do you see how awful that is?
starberry-skies · 1 year
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is it relevant to staple my identity to everything i do? prob not. do i kinda have to do that anyway bc otherwise i'll interact w ppl who hate me? yup
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mamayan · 4 months
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Yandere! Dark Fae King x Darling! Changeling (Part 2)
Part 1 (Here)
cw: NSFW • Sub! Reader • Dom! Yandere • Dark/Yandere Themes • Gore/Death • Monster Fucking • Fae • Kidnapping/Imprisonment • Dubcon • Fem! Darling • Dumbification • Praise • Overstimulation • Pheromone Drugging/Aphrodisiac • Manipulation • Breeding
A/N: Upon multiple requests and asks, I’ve decided to expand and make a part 2 for Avarice and Darling’s story. Enjoy♥️
“Freak!”
“You should be ashamed to be alive! When your own sister died, how dare you appear here!”
“Jinx.”
“I hope you die worse than she. Poor soul…”
You snapped out of it when he finally left again. The nightmares of your past seemingly haunting you as the death of so many rested on your shoulders.
Your fault. It was always your fault, wasn’t it? That’s what you were after all. A jinx.
Ava… he haunted you more than anything. His eyes so dull as of late but you couldn’t find it in yourself to assure him of forgiveness you did not want to give. You’d said horrible things to him though, when he’d confessed to killing your entire village due to your pressuring. He killed your family, or at least, the only family you knew. He killed the women and children, the old and innocent. Ava had no discretion when it came to slaughtering humans.
“Of course I love you! You’re my little sister, why are you asking me such a silly question so late?” Your human sister had looked so befuddled when you’d questioned her love for you. It must’ve been a rebellious phase, for she raised you and your younger human siblings much like a mother should’ve. The mother which birthed your siblings and the child swapped for you had lost herself to alcohol and gambling, her husband and your father too loyal to leave her despite the pit she began to dig for the entire family.
Your fault.
“Come eat. This sickness of her’s seems to be affecting us all. Father shall return with a fresh kill, I’ll make a stew. You like deer stew right?” You hated it but nodded anyway, your sister’s cooking so awful it even made your father’s eyes water but… “I do. I love it… and I love you too.” You’d replied, and it was the warmest moment you remember in that small wooden house.
You’d picked your nail beds bloody, eyes numbly staring at the broken skin and wondering why it wasn’t telling you the right answer. What were you supposed to do? You couldn’t leave, even if you wanted to, and that was the problem. You didn’t want to leave Ava, because aside from your deceased sister, he was the closest living creature to your heart. He owned part of your soul now too, but you could feel him in you too. It wasn’t one sided, and while Ava certainly was full of cruelty, you knew him capable of care. He cared for you, his people and subjects, and his kingdom.
So why did he do it? Harm so many? Oddest of all, why did he abhor humans to much? He wouldn’t answer anything you asked, merely stating it was a necessity, that they needed to die, or be cleansed as he’d phrased it. You had loved a human dearly though, her memory still filling you with the familiar taste of warmth and overcooked venison. She was not a sister by blood but through life and trust.
Would Ava have killed her too?
You could only wonder endless dark halls of a castle you never saw an exit to. The windows revealing what appeared to be an entire kingdom below, built into a forest much like in tales of your childhood. This was a community, one which you now shared responsibility to help grow and flourish.
You didn’t feel like you were home though.
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“Look at me.”
He’s impossible to ignore.
“I will force you if I must.”
You turn, giving the barest of glances upward, head forced to tilt completely back to meet his dark golden eyes. He, in all his immortal and frightening glory, looks tired. You admit it makes something within you ache to see it, but you aren’t ignorant to the fact that you look tired as well.
“You are not sorry at all… are you?” His lips press tight, eyes narrowing a fraction as he cocks his head, a few dark curls spilling like waves to follow the movement. He stalks closer like a predator, and even now, when you know he intends no physical harm to you, it raises your instincts to run. His towering form lowers to the floor where you’ve seated yourself, endless marble surrounding you in an empty ball room, the enormous glass window you’ve opened allowing fresh air in.
“Do you wish me to apologize for eliminating those vile creatures… or for upsetting you?” He cracks a rueful smile, teeth all sharp edges and eyes hardened by your distance. “If it is the latter little flower, then I sincerely am apologetic, I never wished to upset you.” You can tell he’s sincere, see it even, but something still nagged at you that wouldn’t leave.
“Ava…” his full attention is trained on you, “Why do you hate them? What did they do to you?”
His wings shift as he settles himself fully on the ground with you. An image unbefitting of a King yet also suiting him as he leans back on his palms and directs his gaze at the tall ceiling above.
You liked the sight of moonlight bathing him more than candle.
“I thought I loved a human once.”
You flinch, despite knowing it must’ve been so long ago, it stung nevertheless. He twitches, as if to move towards you before he stops himself and settles again, talons scraping along the floor as he continues.
“That human used my youth and ignorance against me and destroyed my entire existence for a time. I lost my position as a rightful heir and prince, lost my home and family, and lost my freedom. I stayed alone a very long time little Faery,” his gaze slides to you, glowing molten gold in rage as he remembers. “All alone, because I did the one thing no Faery is allowed to do, the most forbidden art which exists amongst our kind, all for one measly deceitful human.” His lips pull back in a grimace, even as you crawl a little closer.
He likes that your gaze is upon him again, filled with that familiar compassion and empathy he adores. He just loathes it is directed at him because of his disgusting past.
He watches as your tongue dips out to lick your lips, eyes filled with curiosity as you sit beside him, close enough to nearly touch yet not quite.
“What was it?”
“I granted them access to the Tree of Life. The tree which gave birth to all Faery kind.” His expression turns mocking, jaded as he seems to recall with perfect memory. “I had been ready to pluck the stars from the sky for that filthy ungrateful thing, and they dared to use me to gain eternal life by drinking from the tree’s fountain.”
He sees the look of astonishment and horror, clearly upset as realization dawns. It was said the Tree of Life would die if touched by human hands, destroying all of Faery kind should it occur. If it was true or not was unknown.
“…they touched it…?” You broke the dense silence first, curling your limbs around yourself as you feel the itch of your wings notify you of the awkward arch you’ve made with your spine.
Ava barks a dry laugh, dark amusement sparking in his eyes despite the serious story.
“Of course not little flower. My younger sister killed them before they could dare, becoming a hero for all Faery alike for protecting the race against a treacherous prince and a foul greedy human.”
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He’s amuses himself with watching you through a small handheld mirror. Decorated in gold and jewels, the delicate ornate trinket has a spell cast to view his target at will.
You were asleep, tired from the seamstresses which had fussed so long over your dresses and you, face peaceful as you rest on the large expanse of his bed.
You sleep where he awoke this morning. Curled into the spot like you’re attempting to reclaim any warmth left over from his own slumber.
“You’re making quite a disgusting face, your majesty~” his eyes narrow as his mood sours in an instant.
“Leave witch.” He hisses, undisguised displeasure painting his sharp features as they scrunch in revolution.
“Make me faery,” a lithe feminine voice hisses back, his eyes finally lifting to acknowledge the vermillion haired woman which had appeared before him. “What has you making such a warm expression? I nearly lost my breakfast seeing it.” She glides more than walks, shamelessly spreading the floor length fur coat wrapped around her open, sitting on the arm chair of his throne.
“And your presence is going to make me gouge your eyes out and feed them to my hounds,” he flashes an equally unfriendly smile, the air becoming volatile towards the witch.
“Don’t act as if I wish to be here anymore than you wish it. You were the one who requested my potion.”
“Your potion not your presence.”
Dark eyes roll with a flutter, her red painted lip curling in disdain as she snaps her fingers, a small wooden box appearing in her palm.
“It cannot be delivered frivolously faery, or so you trust your servants so deeply?” He doesn’t answer.
She laughs, handing the box over with a smile as he pulls out a silver dagger and plunges it into his forearm.
Gold leaks from the wound, the witch quickly frowning and removing an empty vial to collect the liquid.
“Don’t be wasteful now, your blood is in high demand amongst my coven. It’s an incredibly binding agent.”
“Silence or I will bind your tongue for all eternity.”
“As if you could.” She cackles, vanished and gone before his talons could sink into her throat.
The box rests in his free hand. His distaste for the witches strong, but he admits they create the most potent and stable magical concoctions. They’re good in business too. He notes she didn’t allow a single drop of blood to go to waste before his wound sealed and closed.
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“Drink for me, petal.”
You look lovely. Dressed lavishly in the finest silks and slowly becoming more confident in your true appearance. You no longer sit before the mirror and grimace, instead you play absently with your wings, more accepting as time continues.
He would rather just take you by force.
This method somewhat feeling beneath him, but in the end, he was already a wicked monster. What was this compared to his true nature?
You still curl or turn away when he touches you, less trusting of him now and though you should be, he finds it irritating. He wants to feel you melt against him again, blink your pretty eyes up at him and whisper his name with your kiss bitten lips.
You eye the delicate glass cup warily.
His clawed hand holding the pretty pink clear cup was nearly comical. He could tell by the quirk of your lip which you quickly tempered to avoid his detection. He caught it all though, still hoping he’s not forced to make you drink it. Though he doesn’t mind the act, pouring the drink in his mouth and laying his lips over your own to create a seal.
You take the cup gingerly with both hands, licking your lips as you bring it close to sniff.
“What is it…?” You look confused, nose scrunching up adorably, and he finds he wishes to kiss you there.
He’s forced to stay where he is though, aware you will wiggle and run if he touches you.
“Tea, made from milk, honey, and dried fruits.”
“It smells sweet…” you still eye him with mistrust, but you take a sip anyway, eyes lighting up as you take another. “It’s very good,” you’re not immune to bribery, “Thank you.”
For just a short moment, he feels his chest warm and a genuine smile grace his lips.
“You’re welcome, little flower. Thank you as well.”
“Huh?” You’ve finished the tea. “What for…?” His smile grows as you tilt your head in confusion.
“For being so foolish.”
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You’re burning from the inside out. Tears and drool soaking your face and the bed as you cry out again.
“Why?” Digging your nails into the fabric, you find the texture appalling compared to usual, too rough and cold. “Ava…” you struggle to breathe, chest heaving as perspiration clings to you like a second skin. “It hurts…” you were fading into a blur of dizziness as your lower belly cramped again, more wetness coating your inner thighs.
“Shh…” he coos, ignoring your weak flinch as he slides his long tongue from your chin to your cheek, drinking your tears as his chest rumbles like a giant cat. “Do you need something sweet girl? Use your words.” He murmurs, groaning as he sees the amount of fluid you’ve leaked, your pussy swollen and glistening as you buck your hips and whine.
“Mean—!” He chuckles at your accusation, smiling shamelessly as he continues his chaste kisses against your skin.
“To you, petal? No, mean would be if I left you like this, no release for your poor little body.” He threatens, ignoring your silent pleas and body language for him to touch you more, keeping just enough distance to have you clawing at him to come back. “I’m nice though, I’m going to kindly fill your womb and make it all better.” It’s like a demon whispering in your ear as you writhe beneath him. His large frame cages you though, presses down on you as your bare chests connect and you can feel the thundering in his rib cage through your own. “Are you going to be good and let me breed you, little feary?”
You can’t think. Not when the promise of something hot and big going inside you, stretching you out like your body is begging for now. You nod, mind already gone as your clouded eyes connect with his own. You look high, pupils blown as he brings two fingers to his lips, opening his mouth and breaking off two of his sharp claws to blunt them.
“Spread your legs.” You obey, pliant body opening at his commands as he uses his fingers to dig into your slick gooey hole. He delights in your moans and reactions, hips moving for more friction as he fucks your tight entrance loose enough to take his cock inside you. “That’s it, petal, you don’t need to think anymore. Let go for me,” he murmurs, kissing you gently, tongue melting into your mouth while he digs his fingers up and rubs until you’re coming around his digits.
He pulls them out slowly, eyes drifting down to catch the sticky wet mess you’ve made and the jump of his cock in response. He laughs, deeply to his core as he brings them to his lips and lets you watch him clean them, blissed out expression marred with tears from pleasure and pain.
“You’re mine. For eternity, you will be always be mine.” His eyes are wild, something frightening entering them as he laughs, face so pleased and enamored you feel the urgent sense to crawl away from him, to run. “There is no escaping me. No where you can go that I won’t find you.” You feel too weak and sluggish to move, to even fight back, as his dark hand wraps around your neck, magic and gold swimming beneath his flesh. He feels warm, hotter than even you and your feverish mind. “I am no longer a patient a male, no longer content to wait and watch for results. You deny me, your mate, for humans which wanted to sacrifice you to a false deity, planned to rape and defile you,” he’s squeezing tighter, not cutting off air but blood flow instead as your mind becomes fluffy and unfocused. He speaks directly into your ear, the pointed tip curling down as he settles himself between your thighs. “They wanted to burn you, did you know? They called you a jinx, hated you, only wished you harm and destruction in the most vile and painful ways… and yet you still choose them?” He looks mad, smile filled with malicious intent and eyes glittering like jewels.
You speak with what little focus you have left…
“My sister…loved me.”
His smile falls, eyes narrowing in displeasure.
“Always…she loved me.”
He shakes his head, disapproval clear. “You think she loved you. Humans aren’t capable of love, my sweet flower.”
“You’re wrong…” he halts, watching as you weakly claw at his hold on your neck. “She loved me..! I know she did! You’re wrong! Take it back!” You cough as he releases your throat completely, eyes wide as you look at him with burning resentment even so deep under the influence of an aphrodisiac.
“I love you, but you,” you look filled with hurt, “you don’t love me.”
He’s shocked into silence as you seethe beneath him, face firm and eyes resolute as you declare his feelings for you.
He snarls, snapping his teeth at you, rage filling him as his wings spread out and magic and malice fill the air.
“I am not afraid to punish you, petal. I will not tolerate disrespect—,”
“Neither will I!” Even in tears, shaking as you are, he shifts back, the overwhelming force of your emotions startling him. “You treat me as if I am not worthy of respect, as if I’m not worthy to be listened to. You aren’t—,” you heave for air, struggling to draw in enough oxygen as you whirl on him, “—asking me. For anything. You just take…”
He’s silent, body frozen and tense as he watches you.
“Was it all a lie… when you said you’d be my friend? I thought faery couldn’t lie,” you’re in tears once more, sorrow endlessly streaming down your cheeks.
“No, don’t cry like that,” he feels oddly sick seeing you so upset like this. His frame once more curling around you, but to simply wrap you in the blanket and bring you to his chest. “We are friends, mates, I do not lie.” He whispers, cradling your body to his chest, trying to urge you to look at him.
“Friends don’t sneak away and do things that they know I wouldn’t like,” you calm after a while, swollen tear streaked face turned into his chest while he pets your hair.
He knows it must be painful, still under the effects of the drug he’d given you. His touch helping ease some of the heat.
“Okay. Okay, I was wrong, I…,” his teeth bare as he forces it past his lips, “I apologize…for not respecting your wishes…,” it makes him want to tear one of his hearts out and crush it. His hatred for humans no less despite his apology.
You look hopeful though, eyes returning some of the light he adores within you.
He’ll apologize everyday if he’s allowed to see that.
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“Oh gods…!”
He’s trying to kill you. He must be.
You can’t struggle away though, no escape in sight, and true to his word Ava has filled your womb over and over again. You’re delirious on the pleasure, the second his heavy cock had entered you the earlier burning pain subsided into mind numbing euphoria. Each powerful snap of his hips has your body jolting upward, one large palm wrapped around your neck keeping you anchored. You could feel every vein and inch searing into you, eyes going in and out of focus on him face as he heaves for air and fucks you into another orgasm.
“Please, more, I need more—!” You’re reduced to a tearful mess, wantonly begging for his seed as he grimaces and fills you up again, balls drawing up tight as your cunt ripples around his length.
His face is ruined, eyes more red than gold as his pupils remain blown out, thick lashes holding a small cluster of tears as he licks his lips and continues his ravenous pace inside you. His hair clings to his face and horns, black curls damp with sweat and your cum, taking on a nearly purple hue. He wears a delirious expression like you, drugged out into oblivion as you both pant and moan as the heat devours you.
He’d felt badly for drugging you, especially as you writhed and cried in pain. His solution had not been to find the witch he’d bought the elixir from though.
He’d simply drank the remaining fluid while smiling mischievously.
“Let’s just fall into complete depravity petal,” he’d said, before your world went in and out of darkness. Only the scent of sugar and spices dominated your brain, and the feeling of fullness and completion each time he spilled his load within you.
“Are you ready for another sweet faery?” He knew you couldn’t answer, knew that words were too far away for your cotton filled mind to conjure. He asks anyway, drawing your hips off the bed, leaving your upper body limp on the soaked silks while he bounces you on and off his cock. “I’ve always known it is hard for Fae to conceive.” He speaks with a slur, as if it is liquor intoxicating him and not a lustful spell. He laughs as you cum around him, moan so breathy it appears like a silent scream as your back arches higher. “I have a good feeling it will not apply to us.” He nods, slamming down to the hilt as he collapses on you while he comes too, nose buried in your collar bone as he humps out his remaining seed and presses deep to ensure it stays.
“I think your little cunt likes being bred, gripping me so tightly so I can’t leave it,” he huffs, breathing labored as he sees you’ve lost consciousness again.
“Looks who’s mean now…” he murmurs tiredly, but his smile is fresh as he licks up your sweat and tears, cock already hardening again as blood swims in his ears like a river.
“I can’t anymore—!” It’s a squeal and a whine mixed, as Ava grunts against your throat.
“Can’t what, petal?” He asks rhetorically, humming as he slowly rolls your hardened nipple between two clawed fingers. His free hand between your legs, messily rubbing your clit as he works his cock inside you. His thrusts are no longer as violent or heavy as they were two days prior when he’d taken the drug, but his body still howled to press you flat and fill you up. To mark his mate up for all to see.
You look divine to him, too weary to even bite him anymore, nails broken from scratching at his back and arms when he’d blacked out and taken you too roughly. Even still, you looked beautiful, skin less sweat soaked and more simply damp, his care to ensure you drank water paying off in between rounds of riding him.
“I think your cunt has finally relaxed,” he teases, enjoying the sloppy squelching which echoes as he drives into you, your pussy indeed finally accepting it’s fate to be subjected to his cock for eternity. “Your womb has dropped too,” his hand stops torturing your clit to press on your lower belly, purring as you weakly complain.
“Let me rest…”
“No. I took the drug later than you, so it’s still in effect for me.” He chuckles, merrily still using your exhausted body. “Just a little more sweet girl, be good for me,” he moans, head falling back as his eyes close in bliss, cock twitching once again to fill you up.
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“I truly am…with child?” His eyes are as wide as your own, cradling you close away from the vermillion haired woman who sneers at Ava.
Rolling her eyes, she nods, fingers pressed to her temples as if her mind is aching.
“Yes. You are with child, as I’ve confirmed four times already. Congratulations little Queen, you managed to love the unlovable.”
“Watch your tone and words witch,”
“My race is not an insult you foul monster—!”
They halt as you giggle, features radiant as you smile and hold your hands over your belly.
“A baby!” Ava is stricken at your delight, throat closing as something sweet tickles him inside. Your floral scent warmer these days, his keen hearing picking up on the second beating of a heart quickly.
“Yes,” he nods, like a love sick dog he grins and answers each time your repeat it in amazement.
The witch truly feels revolted to her core, but wordlessly leaves a book for new faery parents. Leaving without thanks as the happy family gushes over the good news.
As if the disgusting King didn’t know how powerful an aphrodisiac and fertility drug he used on his mate was.
She shrugs, teleporting away to her coven to return to work, minutely pitying the poor faery captured by the dark Fae.
They’re the only fae that can lie after all.
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Dividers/@cafekistune
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specialagentlokitty · 4 months
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Negan x reader - insanity comes and goes
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Hands stuffed in your pocket, you grinned a little bit at the man who was stood in front of you, bat over his shoulder while his people fixed their guns in you.
“So, (Y/N), are you gonna tell me why you’re skulking around home? How’d you get so far?”
“Why would I do that? Takes all the fun out of the game Negan.”
He hummed a little, walking over and he looked at you, reaching up to brush some hair from your face.
“Why not join me? You could have anything you ever wanted here, that prick can barely offer you any food. You tell me what he’s planning and I’ll let you keep your shit, and give you more.”
This had been his play the entire time, Negan was sure that he could turn you against Rick and the others and use you as a double agent.
The issue with that is that was boring, and you didn’t feel like selling out your friends just for some stuff that didn’t even matter in this world anymore.
You smirked a little, and in a swift motion took the bat from his hands.
“Give Lucille back!” He roared.
“Aw is this special to you? You want it back you big baby?”
You raised your brows in suggestion then you moved your hand, flinging the bay across the fence, out into all of the walkers.
“Oops.”
He stormed over, grabbing you by the collar he landed a punch on your face, and he slammed you against the fence.
He sneered, clenching his jaw.
“Whatever game you’re fucking playing, I’m done with it. I’m going to have tour god damn bones sent back to the prick…”
“And I’m gonna haunt your ass until you go insane.” You smirked.
You tossed you aside, and you heard a loud bang before everything went black.
“Get me Lucille!” He snapped.
He looked down at your body, bullet in your head, and he walked past you over to his men and back inside.
He ordered somebody to take your body and throw it to the walkers, and he began gathering a company to pay Alexandria a visit, less than impressed with your visit.
He walked outside, and he was stopped by Simon.
“She’s gone.”
“What the fuck do you mean she’s gone? She wasn’t exactly fucking going anywhere Simon!”
“She’s gone Negan, someone came outside to move the body and it’s not there, there isn’t even a blood trail.”
Negan yelled, slamming his fist into the side of the truck.
“Then they find it!”
He got into the truck, balling his hands into fists in pure rage.
He stayed silent as they made their way to the community, and the gates were opened when they arrived.
“Rick!” He roared.
Said man came jogging over, slowly down to a walk.
“That bitch of a friend of yours, you send her to my home?”
“Who?” Rick asked confused.
“(Y/N), because I hate to break it to you but I put a bullet in the middle of her pretty little head, but now her body is missing, so how many did you send?”
“I never sent anyone.”
Negan grabbed Rick by the back of his shirt, dragging him towards his house and the people followed to see what was going on.
He tossed Rick to the ground and Negan took his gun, aiming it at Carl.
“You tell me the truth, or I put a bullet in your goddamn son too.”
“Oo scary.” You mocked.
“What the fuck?”
Negan turned around to see you sitting on the curb, and you grinned, offering him a little wave.
“Holy crap, now either you’re dead and I’m seeing shit, or there’s more than one of you.”
You hummed a little bit.
“No, just want. I don’t think poor Rick here could handle more than one of me, I annoy him enough.”
“Now I remember watching a bullet go through your brain.”
“Oh yeah? What it look like? Was there a lotta blood? Cause that’s always a fun way to die.”
“Let’s fucking find out!”
Negan took Rick’s gun and aimed it at you, pulling the trigger and a few people screamed.
Negan looked around at them all, noticing the lack of horror or sadness on their faces.
“Come on! What’s wrong with your people I just killed your friend!”
You pushed yourself up, rubbing your forehead, and you looked at your blood on the floor.
“Damn, that is a lot of blood.”
“What the fuck?!”
Negan walked over, shooting your again, and he grabbed his bat, hitting you a few times for good measure.
Your blood splattered his clothes and the ground, and he just stood there looking at you, watching you.
“(Y/N)s just going to wake up again.” Carl called.
Negan looked to him, and Carl shrugged a little bit.
“Apparently out of all the people in the world, death just don’t like me.” You said.
You sat up, wiping the blood from your eyes and you watched Negan spun around with a mortified look on his face.
He’d seen some shit, and done some shit, but this? This was something different compared to anything he had ever seen or done.
“What the shit is wrong with you? Why won’t you die?!”
He swung his bat again, this time keeping an eye on you, and he could see the blood stop flowing from your wound, and you grinned a little bit.
“Please keep going, maybe I can actually get a good night sleep for once.”
He took a few steps away from you, and you sat in your own blood, just grinning from ear to ear at him.
“I told you I’d haunt your ass…”
Negan looked to Rick.
“Tell me this shit ain’t real.”
“No, it’s real. Apparently there’s just no getting rid of (Y/N) at this point.” Rick sighed.
You pushed yourself up, wiping your hands on your shirt.
“Nope, you’re stuck with my ass until you die!” You beamed.
“This is fucking insane. You’re fucking insane.” Negan said.
You gave a half shrug.
“Maybe just a lot, yeah. Sanity comes and goes.”
You took a step forward and he subconsciously took one back.
The problem with being human was that no matter how big and tough you acted, if you saw something that wasn’t natural, your immediate response is to stay away from it.
So Negan pulled Rick in front of him and you stopped walking.
“What the actual fuck…? Now I got some psychos in my lot, but you? You’re a whole new level of fucked.”
“I know! It’s great!” You laughed.
You bent down, picking up a tree branch and you looked at Negan.
“So, who do you think will win? Me or you? Cause I’m kinda wondering how long it’ll take me to beat the shit outta you with this branch before it breaks.”
“You come any closer and I’ll paint the ground with his blood.”
You hummed.
“Yeah, okay.”
You tossed the stick aside.
“Oh by the way Negan, you should probably evacuate your base.”
“What the fuck did you do?”
“I maybe have rigged some explosives. I was bored waiting for you.”
Some of his men began running back to their cars and trucks.
“You should probably find them before someone triggers one.” You smirked.
He clenched his jaw, pushing Rick to the ground.
“Run…” you whispered.
You grabbed the stick and ran after them all, yelling as they jumped into their vehicles to try and get away from you.
It made you laugh loudly and you swung it at the door of Negans truck.
“You fucked it Negan! You can’t kill me but I can kill the shit out of you!”
He stuck his middle finger up at you as he drove away and you grinned proudly at Rick and a Michonne.
Daryl put his arm around your shoulders.
“See, this is why we need a crazy immortal son of a bitch.” He said.
“Yeah, what he said.”
“Well, at least that’ll make him rethink his next plans for a while.” Michonne said.
And it did.
Negan was now rethinking what he had been doing there.
People were a resource, he didn’t want to kill them, and apparently no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t kill you.
So he had to find a way to get around that if he wanted to keep doing what he was doing, but a voice in the back of his head was also warning him not to cross paths with you again.
But he wasn’t one to back down from a fight, and this just made things a whole lot more interesting
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funnywormz · 19 days
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I think this shitshow with Toshiro stems from the trend of people INSISTING that interpersonal conflict must be a moral failing. Like I think there's something to be said about how people afford so much less patience to people who are autistic in the "wrong" ways, but also Laios and Toshiro just clash on a fundamental level that has nothing to do with that. Hell, you could read Toshiro as autistic as well. People related to Laios' side of the argument but instead of getting any nuance out of it they started projecting their experiences with ableist people onto Toshiro.
AGREE AGREE AGREE. i think that Fandom Brain gets people very used to thinking of conflicts in terms of "who is the bad guy and who is the good guy", so when they encounter a more nuanced conflict they don't really know what to do. i don't think toshiro is a bad person at all, in his conflict with laios he's just exhausted and starving and has been pushed to the limit and from his perspective, laios doesn't even seem that emotionally affected by the situation. i don't think what he said was right and it was pretty cruel, but i don't think he's a villain or deserves to be permanently hated as a character just bc he fucked up this time lol
also yeah you could definitely read him as autistic, and i think that highlights an issue in the autistic community in general bc like....... a lot of autistic people have conflicting needs which can lead to conflict between them/make them unable to stand being around each other. and it's not because either of them are neurotypical or bad people, they're just incompatible. like autistic people who loudly stim vocally and autistic people who meltdown when they have to be around loud noises, for example. it doesn't mean either of them is bad or not autistic, just that they have conflicting needs
i 100% agree with the last part too. i disliked toshiro at first myself bc i had been (and still do ngl) projecting onto laios hard and the conflict they had reminded me of times when people have been mean or angry at me irl for social blunders i've made unintentionally, or when someone i thought liked me/was my friend turned out to actually hate me. it's a common experience for autistic people and that scene resonates with that! but i think it also helps to take a step back from projecting our own traumatic experiences onto the scene and just look at it objectively. laios isn't perfect either and he's the one who actually starts the physical fight by slapping toshiro (i feel like i don't see many people mention this lol). i feel super bad for him in that scene but he's not a perfect victim and has done things wrong himself too
as an autistic person i've also been in situations where i can relate to toshiro too lol, like where someone is overly physically and emotionally familiar with me when we don't know each other well and i've wanted them to back off but haven't been sure how to say it without hurting their feelings. this kind of conflict is far from just being a "neurotypical vs neurodivergent" thing as a lot of people portray it in the fandom
idk i just wish people would think a little more deeply about the scene and put their own emotions and experiences aside to instead consider the conflict with the added context of the individual characters and their respective cultures + the situation they're in. people don't have to like toshiro but i wish they wouldn't paint him as a villain or make up awful shit about him just to justify their feelings when he isn't even that bad of a dude in canon yknow 😑. also we literally see him at rock bottom struggling and freaking out and i think that's important to remember. in a different context i doubt he would have ever said those things to laios
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prince-liest · 2 months
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Don't mind me getting on my soapbox for a moment... a lot of this musing is admittedly for the sake of my own processing of this topic, re: aroaceness. Read at your own peril! <3
I'm generally a very "ship and let ship" kind of person, but I think I would definitely append a little caveat of, like, "As long as you're not being actively invalidating and detrimental to others" to that. Which is a delightfully vague statement that can be interpreted practically any way, I know, hahaha.
In the case of this particular post I've just been thinking about how, like... seeing an aroace character like Alastor get written into dozens upon dozens of PWPs (including ones that don't even touch on the subject of his aceness at all) is really not something that I personally find to be hurtful or offensive. It's just smut for the sake of smut, of a character people want to see awful, sexy things done to (or doing). Valid! I vibe with you! More people should just write the PWPs they want to see in the world!
But on the other hand, I've several times seen this very particular type of art (usually it's a comic, but admittedly I haven't been reading very many Hazbin Hotel fics so maybe it's there, too) where Alastor is slotted into the "methinks the lady doth protest too much" trope. As in, he's expressing strong feelings about a character (usually Vox or Lucifer, sometimes Angel Dust) to someone, probably Rosie, and the person he's confiding to is some variant of, "Oh, silly Alastor, you're obviously in love!" And then he denies it, says that the very idea disgusts him, and the character titters to themselves about how he's so naive in the matters of romance or whatever.
And it's, like.
The "strong feelings" in question are almost always frustration/annoyance/disgust, and him being like, "Nnnno, I just hate his person" is treated like a silly and naive misunderstanding of his own feelings because obviously he's in love. Please imagine that Alastor was a female character who was established to be a lesbian. Now examine how that suddenly makes this scene feel.
(Also, Rosie being the go-to for this is a little frustrating when she's the one who, in canon, explicitly says that she wouldn't make that assumption of him.)
There's such a chasm of difference between how I see people wanting to ship Alastor for reasons of "I just want to!" vs folks who engage with him being aroace in ways that are infantilizing and invalidating. There are so many people out there - not just aro/ace people, but anyone who's not exclusively into the standard type of person they should be into at the time society deems they should be into them, which is most queer people and even many cishet folks - that have been told that exact kind of thing in real life. It reads like something out of a compulsory heterosexuality guidebook, and it actively makes it harder to leave the closet or even realize that you're in one at all.
So I guess it just feels frustrating to see it get made into a punchline, especially by folks who are shipping queer ships. I genuinely can't wait until fandom society advances to the point of consistently treating aro/acespec folks as queer instead of Queer Lite (TM), because let me tell you, ime the comphet experience and the amato/allonormativity experience are in fact nigh-identical except for how they're treated within online communities. There's a reason the pan -> gay -> ace pipeline is a thing.
But, hey! We're already doing way better than we were in 2012!
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drbased · 1 month
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i am highly spiritual, and yet we have almost identical beliefs about humanity, religion and its organization, etc. save for the conclusions it brings us to. just found this really interesting, honeslty.
In the nicest possible way: no, I don't think we have almost identical beliefs. Or rather, I think we have one primary difference in perception that changes the entire nature of our beliefs.
One of the accidental problems with language is that it can make connections and associations between concepts that aren't really real. For example, we have tras claiming that aspects of your personality, mannerisms, hairstyle etc. are all an expression of an internal sense of gender, which is retroactively justified as real through the existence of those characteristics. It's a tautology, but it's a potent one, because those characteristics can add up to something deeply personal and individual, which isn't communicated easily. One person's 'qu**r identity' can be entirely different from another person's 'qu**r identity', but due to the simple existence of the term they can find a percieved similarity of experience that wouldn't exist without it.
This relates to spirituality because I think what's happening here is that the word 'spiritual' is being used like the word 'gender'; that is, an extra layer of meaning is added to the human experience that is retroactively justified by the existence of those human experiences. In this case, the nature of spirituality seemingly being discussed is a sense of profundity and awe.
The primary dispute is one of perspective: as an atheist, I say that actually, the concept of 'profound' is an entirely human construction. Things aren't built with a natural sense of 'awe-inspiringness' that we as humans simply tap into - but rather, the emotion is generated inside us in response to the neutral things that are already there. It's a seemingly minor shift in approach, and many would feel is a nitpick, but I think it's accidentally become the crux of this whole argument.
This is why many spiritual people think that atheists 'hate humanity' and 'are cold and unfeeling' - they percieve the world to be inherently spiritual; that is, consisting of an inexorable quality that humans should be able to experience, so anyone not claiming to recognise this quality is simply denying their own humanity, their own senses, as well as denying the profundity of being: the two are inexorably interlinked. I can see where this argument comes from - we, as humans, tend to naturally feel 'cleaner' after a wash, we tend to fell happier after having laughed etc. etc. and if we don't feel these things, either there's something supposedly 'wrong' with us, or we're denying those feelings so we get to feel superior in some way. And don't get me wrong, the classic 'reddit atheist' is like this - the kind of guy who says that your pet cat don't feel love when they nuzzle you in the morning. There are definitely people (men especially) who want to feel above any and all sensory-based human emotional response.
But.
My primary argument is that things external to us (and some internal) do not have any inherent emotional quality; any emotions I generate in response to them are my own personal, fallible and fragile appreciation for them, generated within my brain in response to stimuli. This may sound less magical, and that's the point: laughter generates happiness because it's an evolutionarily important pro-social tool. Washing makes you feel 'cleaner' because it's evolutionarily important to avoid disease. There's no intrinsic nature to these things that we tap into; the emotions and subsequent meaning are generated by us. If someone managed to figure out what 'love' is in humans and found out that animals don't show 'love' as we know it - well, regardless of how much of an asshole he is, that atheist above would be right. But it shouldn't be earth-shattering because 'love' does not need to be some quality inherent to nature to have meaning and value - our version of 'love' is purely human, and whatever our pets do may not be 'love' by our standards, but something speciifc to them.
This argument is ultimately immaterial unless we can demonstrate for faith-based thinking can result in harm. And unfortunately, this is how people end up getting manipulated by churches and cults. The sense of awe you feel in a crowd of thousands of people listening to music and services doesn't exist in the ether - it's deliberately manufactured explicitly to generate that feeling inside you. So this isn't just an argument about correctness; this is an argument about harm.
Why do you think churches are built that way; it's easy to think of them as just inherently magnificent, but that is just the limitation of the way our language constructs adjectives - 'magnificent' is given the same linguistic weight as, say, 'squishy' or 'spiky'. But 'magnificent' is a value qualifier, not a neutral adjective; it's something that requires an internal sense of judgement - but due to the power of emotions it can feel real, perhaps more real than pricking your finger on a spiky thing. Religion has a tendency to place reality into a secondary level of importance; god/the universe is what's more 'real' than us. This is a hierachy; it places our subjective experiences and values as merely a conduit for something more real and meaningful than we could ever be, than we could ever imagine (and, if you think my argument is cold and male and misogynistic, then I like to remind you which of the sexes loves hierarchy). And this is hierarchy that is absolutely ripe for exploitation.
No, I do not think that spiritual/religious belief is a guarantee of exploitation, nor is it the only source of exploitation - but a tendency to see your emotions as merely a conduit for some universal truth means you will be much more easily persuaded to into believing things based on your emotional perception, and the kinds of people who want to persuade you are typical doing so to gain something; not always something sinister, but it certainly can be.
Too many spiritual people want to have their cake and eat it too: they want to skirt over arguments of correctness and harm and jump straight to accusing us of denying our senses - when what they actually mean is that by denying our senses we're denying reality. But when we claim that actually we're perfectly capable of listening to our senses, we just call these things 'awe' and 'profundity', they turn around and say 'that's just what spirituality is! you're just like us, just in denial!' When we say that our emotional experiences are not spiritual we mean it; this isn't 'agreeing on most things' - this is an entire shift in perception. My senses are mine, and the meaning I generate from them is mine. Those sense are a fallible product of evolution, and the meaning I generate from them is also a fallible product of evolution. But that also means that the profundity has a new origin, and this is ultimately less safe and comfortable than from some external source I can rely on; the profundity comes from the terrifying realisation that these things just are, with no invisible connective tissue outside the bare reality of cause-and-effect. That isn't inherently profound, but I make it so through my own human ability to generate meaning. And as that meaning is mine, therefore the responsibility for it is mine.
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emasstars · 5 months
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alternate reality
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silly little idea i had where dally didn’t get shot, and just ran away to nyc. this will not become a series. this was just me trying to get ideas down.
he wasn’t exactly sure how he ended up in this situation. he kind of blacked out years ago, knowing he had to get away—knowing he could never go back. he was about to throw himself off of this roof, some miserable, 50-years-old-looking woman with awful eyeshadow yelling at him over the work he was doing.
“how many times do i have to tell you,” she whined, her voice like nails on a chalkboard. dally was kind of surprised she even had a husband, and kids. “those aren’t the same colours as i had before!”
“listen, woman,” dally said, wiping his forehead with his sleeve. he hated this job, but what other options did he have? “i’m just using the materials my boss gave me.”
the woman, ugly thing she was, narrowed her eyes. dally climbed down the fire escape, ignoring her complaints and cries, saying some bullshit like, “i’m the landlord!” and blasting some feminism in his ears. he got it, it was the 1970s, but it wasn’t anything personal!
“i’m doing my job,” he deadpanned, wiping the grease from his hands onto his uniform once he was back on the ground.
the woman scoffed, crossing her arms. “well, it’s not good enough!” she sneered, and it took everything in dallas not to punch her right then and there. instead, he managed to stay silent, packing up his toolbox.
“i’m out,” he muttered.
“excuse me?”
“i said i’m out!” he snapped. “hire someone else for this, i can’t deal with your bullshit.”
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you let out a shaky breath. you recently moved into a new life—new city, new you—and while a fresh start seemed like a great idea at first, now it’s turned out to be awful. you don’t know anyone, all of the people in the complex are rude, and they treat you like you’re some vile dirt left under their shoe that they can’t scrape off.
so, here you stand, desperate for some sort of communication, about to rap your knuckles against the splintered door that belongs to your neighbour’s apartment.
he keeps to himself, and you rarely see him, but the walls are thin, and sometimes you’ll wake up early in the morning because some bang sounded from his apartment. you glance down at the small tray in your hands, carrying some foods. hopefully, he won’t be offended.
you exhale shakily, your brain working this up to be more than it actually is. you replay in your head what you plan to say, swallowing dryly before knocking on the door.
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dontyouworrydaddy · 10 months
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First of all, I love your blog so much, on god. I never fail to read every single one of your posts. You're a blessing to the COD simps community. Secondly, I'd like to request a female reader this time. Usually, I ask for GN, so that everyone can feel included. Please, TF 141, Konig (and Vaqueros too if it's ok) with a gf / wife who is a pro gamer. Like she can play any video game at the highest difficulty with ease, solo dungeons and even the occasional raid in MMOs and just destroys everyone in every fight. She even has a Twitch and YouTube account and she's one of the most popular streamers out there. She prefers FPS (but RPGs too) because she genuinely likes them, but also as a way to pay tribute to her military man. Women have an unfair reputation of being bad gamers and I hate it because it's completely false. My roommate is a beast of a gamer. Thank you so much and sorry for the long ass ask.
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𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐥
Task Force 141 (+König & Los Vaqueros) + fem! Reader
NORA, HAVE I TOLD YOU THAT I LOVE YOU? You got no idea how much this made me smile and blush. I totally look like an idiot right now. THIS IS SO CUTE😖😖😖
I‘m a gamer too and let’s say… we only get hate. ESPECIALLY ON COD. Last night I had my voice chat on for the first time and oh boy… the things I heard…
"go back to the kitchen"
"What hacks do you use"
"No way a female is good at this game"
blablabla. I was like 😃 damn sensitive asf boys.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE ASK AND I HOPE YOU LIKE IT💘💘💘
✥﹤┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈﹥✥
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König
In the world of all the professional gamers all time, your name was always mentioned. Thousands of videos exist about you and your skills. Streamers were honored if they got to 1 vs 1 you, because that would mean that they get to flex by saying they were able to play with you. Even through they’d loose. Your name was known worldwide and so many people were looking up to you.
König admired you. He had always admired your talents and watched your streams with a mixture of awe and pride in the living room while you were live in your gaming room.
One day, your chat buzzed with excitement and cheers. You wondered why they were freaking out because you were having a chat with your fans. The chat was completely going crazy as they all asked the same thing:
Y/N got a boyfriend?
Please tell me it’s just her brother😔
IS THAT A MAN? IN HER HOUSE?
As you turn around you can see König in the corner of your room. He probably forgot you were still streaming and he looks as confused as you do. "Hey love" you finally said, causing the chat to literally explode. König comes a little closer and kisses your forehead. "Just wanted to ask if you wanna eat something" König says and tries to hide himself as good as he can. His heart definitely started beating faster than a few moments before. "hmmm… yes!" you reply and take a look at the chatscreen and see the the people waiting for you to confirm.
"Yes, he's my man" you said, your voice tinged with affection and pride, sharing your secret with your viewers.
König, caught off guard but unable to hide his emotions, blushed slightly, his heart swelling with love and admiration for you. He stepped back into view, leaning in to give you a gentle kiss on the cheek, which you welcomed with a radiant smile.
The chat erupted into a frenzy of supportive messages as your viewers reveled in the heartwarming moment.
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Simon Riley
It was a usual day and you were 40 minutes into your stream but you noticed that the chat was talking about someone behind you. Curiosity piqued, you glanced over your shoulder and couldn't suppress a grin as you saw Simon, standing there and watching you from afar. He probably doesn’t know that they can all see him, not his face though.
You turned around and gave him one of your sweet smiles which he returned. "You know that they can see you right?" you tell him and by his facial expression you can see that he didn’t know it.
Without missing a beat, you turned to the camera and addressed your chat with a smile, "Well everyone" you said "meet my man!"
The chat erupted with excitement and hearts, and you could almost feel the virtual cheers cheering through the screen. There were a lot of comments about you two now. There were also comments about his frame and by reading those, you could feel your cheeks heating up.
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John MacTavish
Today you streamed on Twitch and planned on playing destiny 2. You planned on playing it again since it made so much fun last time.
However, like always John wanted to stay hidden from the camera but still wanted to watch you play while reading some reaction from the chat. Your viewers never knew about him. I mean, how could they when he tried to hide as best as he can.
But fate had different plans that day. His arms occurred with your camera, revealing the glimpse of a man sitting next to you. The chat erupted with curiosity and in that moment, you knew you wouldn’t be able to hide it anymore. John read the comments too and waved at the camera but still not showing himself fully. You let out a small laugh and hugged his arm slightly. "That’s my boyfriend" you clarified and the chat was exploding with excitement.
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John Price
One day, as your Twitch chat buzzed with excitement, a curious viewer noticed a familiar figure standing behind you in the frame. "Hey, who's that?" the chat exploded and you knew you wouldn’t be able to hide it anymore since John was able to do anything but stay quiet while you’re streaming.
A smile graced your lips, knowing it was time to introduce the world to the man who held your heart. "Oh, that's my man" you said nonchalantly, knowing the chat would go wild.
In an instant, John's face took a red shade and you could feel his heart melt. He thought that you might be embarrassed to show him but clearly you’re not. He came a little closer to you and the chat got a little clearer view of him and everyone was complimenting him.
With a smile, John leaned in, planting a tender kiss on your cheek. The chat erupted with cheers and hearts, seeing their favorite streamer be so in love was making them happy.
"you guys are so cute together!" was what almost everyone was typing into the chat and you couldn’t help but feel so happy right now.
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Kyle Garrick
As one of the most popular streamers on Twitch, you had an enormous following of fans who eagerly tuned in to witness your gaming skills. The thrill of conquering challenging dungeons, soloing difficult quests, and leading epic raids in MMOs kept your viewers on the edge of their seats.
Your love for gaming ran deep, not just for the joy it brought you but because it somehow reminded you of your boyfriend. Kyle was always supporting you and he loved you in your darkest times. He was your motivation to keep going even when you didn’t want to sometimes.
As you streamed while playing Until dawn and the chat was exploding with excitement as someone noticed a figure moving behind your camera setup and mentioned it, which caused the others to see the man behind you too. You stopped the game and looked behind you. It was Kyle standing there with a plate of food and an iced coffee in his hands. You couldn’t help but melt on spot at the sight of him.
"So everyone !" you said, your voice filled with affection. "Looks like my special someone decided to make a cameo appearance. Say hello to man!"
In that moment, the chat exploded with greetings and cheers, expressing their love and support for the unexpected guest. Meanwhile, Kyle's cheeks flushed with a hint of shyness, never quite used to being in the spotlight.
"Uh, hey there, everyone," he stammered placing the plate on your desk along with your drink and a smile playing on his lips. "These are for you, love. Thought you might get hungry after a while."
As the chat continued to shower both of you with love, you couldn't help but steal a glance at Kyle. His presence, even virtually, filled you with warmth and reassurance. Without hesitation, he leaned in, placing a tender kiss on your cheek.
The chat exploded with even more excitement as they witnessed the affectionate gesture.
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Alejandro
Among your many followers on Twitch and YouTube, there was one person who held a special place in your heart - Alejandro. Your boyfriend who supports you and who was always by your side when you needed him.
You were streaming your latest gameplay, the chat was buzzing with excitement and admiration for your skills. But a man behind the camera caught everyones attention. The chat was now questioning who it is and needed clarification.
A playful grin spread across your face as you glanced over at Alejandro, who had come to support you during your stream.
With a touch of mischief in your voice, you replied, "Oh, that handsome man? He's my soon to be husband."
A faint blush spread across his cheeks, but he leaned in and gave you a gentle kiss on the cheek, right in front of the camera. The chat went wild with excitement, and you couldn't help but laugh at the adorable reaction.
"See, I told you," you teased playfully. "They love you almost as much as I do."
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Rudy
As a popular Twitch and YouTube streamer, your skill and charisma drew in countless fans and followers. The chat would explode with excitement whenever you embarked on a new gaming adventure. It was during one of these electrifying streams that fate intervened.
The chat was lively as always, filled with adoring fans and cheering supporters. You were in the zone, showcasing your skills in a competitive FPS match. Little did you know, a surprise was in store for you. Unbeknownst to you, Rudy had entered the room and was watching you from behind the camera.
One of your fans in the chat noticed him, a smile stretching across their face as they typed, "Hey, who's that handsome guy behind the camera?"
You chuckled, casually replying, "Oh, that's my man Rudy."
The chat erupted with excitement, filled with a chorus of "Awws" and many many compliments. Rudy, initially a little taken aback, couldn't help but blush at the overwhelming show of support and affection for both of you.
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bananasfosterparent · 4 months
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For some reason it seems hard for people to understand a magical fantasy couple in a magical fantasy world outside of real life can have a relationship that's:
Evil (selfish)
Unhealthy
Dark
Morbid
Codependent
Posessive
Obsessive
BUT still be:
Functional
Enjoyable for the couple themselves
FULLY HAPPY
A positive experience for the couple
Just because a certain type of relationship will go a certain type of way in real life, doesn't mean it has to in an excapism fantasy where it wouldn't even need to.
Are Ascended Astarion and my Evil Tav a healthy couple that practice safe boundaries and constructive habits? No, absolutely not. Not at all.
Are they content with one another and able to find complete and utter joy in their union and dynamics in a way that is so overwhelmingly positive for both of them? Yes. And that's the fun of it. Since they don't exist in real life, there's no reason for their story to be tragic unless if I wanted it to be. 🤷🏽‍♀️
Nothing about real life matters in this context because I (as the artist and writer for my character and crafter of her story) am not someone who blurs the lines between fantasy and reality, therefore it is safe to indulge in this fantasy and not have to worry about myself wanting to seek this lifestyle in real life.
It's wild to me that so many seem to want to "protect" people from seeing the content and seeking "that sort of relationship" irl. As if it's some infection that will render people mindless. Why think so little of others? Can they not figure out how a block button works? Can they not block tags and keywords? Can they not remove themselves from posts and conversations that make them uncomfortable? Can they not distinguish real life from fantasy? Can they not research BDSM relationship dynamics for real life on their own?
They have google and access to real world communities for healthy couple dynamics in real life. Just as the rest of us do.
While you shouldn't purposely use a trigger against someone, there is no reason for people to censor themselves for roleplaying something innocent and fun, in the way the game intended.
You can disagree, hate AA all you want and that's perfectly fine. But please stop trying to make everyone else who likes him, hate him too. It's counterproductive, it's selfish, inconsiderate, and sometimes borderline victim blaming (when a great many AA fans themselves have trauma experience as well).
Our Tavs and Durges can have a perfectly imperfect relationship with him, be evil and happy with one another as much as we want them to be, and there's no argument against it that makes it a bad, non-canon, or awful thing.
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dnalt-d2 · 3 months
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(TW for racism/xenophobia, as well as what's going on with Cellbit right now. For anyone who wants to know about that, I put the documents he put out in the replies for the post, as well as TWs for what it contains)
You know, I gotta say I'm really glad I'm hardly on twitter and BARELY know how to navigate it. Because I never actually SEE any of the drama going on over there, I just hear it from tumblr people coming here from over there, and that's definitely the case here as well as well
And I know I haven't really talked much about QSMP Drama before, but what's going on right now is hitting me a little harder than I would've thought, so I do wanna give my two cents on it
For starters, I read through the entire document that Cellbit put out and I feel absolutely horrible for what he's going through right now, and for what he went through in the past. Especially since I've been through something similar to one of the things he mentioned. Not to mention the fact that I'm also most likely asexual as well. (This is kinda why I wanted to talk about it at all, if I'm being honest) I really hope things get better for him, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart
And as for the apparently rampant xenophobia that's been targeted towards the Brazilian community, I honestly feel absolutely terrible that this has been happening. And I really hope that people can come here and find a better part of the community to interact with, if they choose to stay at all. Which I can certainly understand anyone choosing to leave, however unfortunate that is. Either way, I'm really sorry this has been happening to you guys, and it never should have happened in the first place (And anyone else who's experienced this, you have my sympathy as well, even if I know it isn't really gonna help much)
For anyone that stays, I'm really sorry things have been so shitty. Obviously there's not gonna be any place that's completely safe and tolerant, but I certainly hope things over here are better than on twitter
QSMP has been an amazing experience for me, and the fact that I've learned so much about so many different cultures has been absolutely incredible. I'm not the kind of person who can just learn this kind of stuff by reading up on it, so this has really been a great way to learn about things that I either never thought to look into, or just wasn't able to understand for whatever reason
Anyone that sees this sort of project, which has been connecting so many different communities and cultures, and decides to still be so intolerant and hateful, are just a special kind of awful. And frankly, they're the ones losing out on something incredible
(Btw I'm not sure what all to tag this as, since again, I don't really talk about drama stuff all that often, so if anyone wants me to tag a specific trigger or anything else, please let me know)
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Rose Recaps Rose Tinted Glasses It's been three months since I made a post thanking this community for being a place for me to share my love of BL.
And since then, every day I feel a little bit more comfortable here.
This place is so special to me for so many reasons and the fact that I found it is a small miracle. I was talking with my friend Neely about something BL related and they told me that they think I'm doing much better since I came here. So thanks again.
I was never a part of any online fandom. And before BL I never really felt like I was missing something. Maybe because I always found someone irl that I could freak out about whatever I was watching I never really felt the need to go look.
And the people here are exceptionally kind. Before, I made a point to never engage much online, except for certain support groups, because of the hate that sometimes exists in certain spaces. So I was very much surprised by the kind humans that exist in this bl fandom in this corner of the internet.
Also. There is some serious brilliant people here. Look giffing is not easy, it takes a long time, sometimes you spend so much time with a set only to hate it by the end and never posting it. And sometimes you post something and you're really proud and crickets. And sometimes you post it just so it doesn't go to waste and all of a sudden it explodes. It's all part of the magic.
I keep my sets pretty simple so I'm in awe of how some people make these beautiful art pieces with layers and colouring and typography. It's incredible and I applaud your creativity and patience.
Speaking of brilliance, I'm constantly in awe of the meta writers. That shit is not easy.
It takes way longer than we think, to make it neat and readable, adding gifs or shots to illustrated a point, sometimes wasting so much time finding the gif you want in the mess that is the gif search (I understand it now, cause yesterday I was on the hunt and it would've been quicker to make the damn gifs), and reviewing it before posting, changing it in the process, sometimes leaving it in drafts because the idea is not completed. I'm tired just thinking about this. I'm not able to do that. Sure I can talk for hours about this stuff but actually organize my ideas into a coherent point of view and writing it down. Nope. Not me. So bravo meta writers. I applaud you.
And of course all the people that share the stuff that really matters. Like the colours, the wardrobe, the places we see, the news about what's coming, language nuances, pictures of the pretty people in sometimes ridiculous or beautiful outfits, sometimes the pretty people before shirts were invented, and some of the funniest commentary I ever encountered.
I don't wanna single people out by tagging them because truly there are way too many. So I just want to thank some people that helped me navigate this place and made this time so enjoyable. First and foremost. @twig-tea You were the first person I talked to here and you were so kind and patient with me and my awkwardness and lack of knowledge of how this place works. She also writes great meta and is brilliant and everyone should be following her. @lurkingshan because of the Sahara-Sensei post that you tagged me in and made me feel so seen. @pharawee because IFYLITA just wouldn't have been the same without your sets. @respectthepetty because she helped get the colour coded subs right and she appreciates the bokeh in all its glory. @itsallaboutbl for screaming with me in portuguese. @mikuni14 Because she's been so incredible kind to me. @iguessitsjustme because of many reasons. And If I ever reblogged anything from you, consider yourself tagged in this post. All of you are amazing. And finally...
@blmpff for a lot but mostly for the most unexpected and incredible moment I experienced in this short time. The day that a bird took over my dash. Khun Feathers was such a treat and this masterpiece was the highlight of the day.
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image by @blmpff It's been a wonderful year and I look forward to see what happens tomorrow. Wishing you all a happy new year!💜
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I would like to say thank you to all whom have shared, commented, or reached out to me about the situation I spoke of in my previous post.
I will reiterate that I am not blameless in all this. I have said mean-spirited things, and have reached out to those I have spoken ill of and been honest to them about this. I endorsed unkind beliefs about numerous members of the fandom, and I declined to take action on instances of anonymous hate, racial aggression or outright cyber stalking. I have engaged in untrue speculation about other users, and I have performed actions that I cannot take back. This makes me part of the problem, and I own that. Again, to those of you whom I have reached out to and apologised personally, I will reiterate this publicly: I am sorry. I was unfair, I was unkind, and I will do better.
I do not wish to make further public commentary on the perpetrators. I have said my piece, and I believe I have done so in a way that does not suggest I have not had a part to play. I will state again that, at the end of the day, this all started over fanfiction. We came here for our love of reading and writing stories about our favourite characters and our favourite worlds. Not this.
But where there has been so much pain, suffering, anger and hatred, there is also the burgeoning of hope. Individuals from all sides of this fandom have lent their ear and offered me a truly astonishing outpouring of kindness, acceptance and support. Many mutuals whom I have had little interaction with in the past have come to offer kind words and encouragement. Users I have not known in the past have reached out. People who have believed untruths about me and Ange have apologised to me, and I have readily accepted these apologies in the spirit of doing and being better. I have even been able to correspond with people of whom I had spoken ill of and levied a great deal of emotional damage to in the past, and the degree of love and well-wishes from a community that I had long considered 'broken' has really and truly been a testament to how willing we all are to effect change and move on as a group.
I would like to say thank you to you all: for those of you who have reached out, for those of you who are thinking of reaching out, and those who have offered your support silently. There are many ways in which you've all done this, and it is so incredibly appreciated. We've had a difficult run on here, but here's hoping we can call it the Post-Season 1 Madness in our fandom lore and recall it with wry expressions and the pangs of hurt since passed, rather than continued hostility. It won't be easy. There's been a lot of bad blood here. But I'm ready for change, and I know everyone else is, too. That's good enough for me.
Lastly, and these words are understatements: I want to say thank you to @ewanmitchellcrumbs. Ange, you have been admirable in all this. You've faced an awful lot in your time here, none of it easy and little of it kind, and while it is validating to see the outpouring of support for you, I know that none of it can truly erase what has happened. We all of us see the things you've endured, and you are absolutely one of the strongest women I know. I love you very dearly, and I truly hope that from here on out, fandom is the enjoyable experience that you deserve.
Thank you, everyone. Here's to a happy 2024, and an exciting lead-up to Season 2.
Team Daemon for the win!
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hate my autism hate be higher support needs hate be like that hate it all hate make useless n not understand hate can’t control hate how everyone hate me for it & hate everyone who co opt high support needs who call themself that when can do all things so many things be so independent hate them for call themself high support as if fun quirky validate & then be mean bully yell hate me when show struggle because actual higher support need when cannot hide struggle because actual higher support need
(& can just imagine see if other people call out then will be like well i also autistic i don’t do that awful behavior bread do autism not give excuse not be normal & 276463738 people like them will pop up out nowhere and agree & say shit like severe autism not exist levels ableist we all same amount autistic. if that actual true if actual believe that then surely don’t mind trade?? because would love your easy ass life would love be able independent like you have all ability like you)
this upset this vent this not have any nuance yes level 1 & low support need struggle it not mean easy & it not about all level 1 LSN it very specific group people etc etc etc etc please dear god don’t add to this shit by nitpick significant disability person’s very struggle language communication issues
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transmascissues · 8 months
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Hey I'm transfemme and wonder what your opinion on trans mascs like Buck Angel actively being hostile to trans women, I don't know what to think of this blog yet, but I don't assume the worst in you yet.
i think that what they do is awful and inexcusable and that it's awful that buck angel in particular gets so much media attention despite how horrible he is. i hate that people like that exist in our community at all, and i hate that we live in a world where the easiest way for a marginalized person to be given a voice is by openly shitting on other marginalized people.
i also think the fact that they do that doesn't say anything about the how much power or privilege trans men&mascs have as a whole, and that their behavior is an expression of how common transmisogyny is as a whole and not some sort of problem with trans men&mascs specifically. trans men&mascs "have a transmisogyny problem" because the society our community exists in has a transmisogyny problem.
trans men&mascs being actively hostile to trans women is fucking horrible because anyone being actively hostile to trans women is fucking horrible, and because other trans people being actively hostile to trans women is especially unjustifiable when we're supposed to be in this together. they're shit people and i actively oppose their behavior because i actively oppose transmisogyny in general, and i hate that so many people's first exposure to trans men&mascs is through people like that.
bottom line: trans women are wonderful and i would rather be in community with trans women than with transmisogynistic trans men&mascs any fucking day because there should be no place for transmisogyny in our (or any) community. trans men&mascs have a responsibility to shut down transmisogyny within our community because everyone has a responsibility to do so within the communities they're a part of.
and it's honestly heartbreaking that to so many people, me just talking about the issues trans men&mascs face makes me somehow more likely to support or excuse transmisogynists. the mark they've left on our community and the way other people see us is truly fucking devastating to me.
i can't tell you what to think of my blog, but i do hope that you walk away with the impression that even though this blog in particular focuses on my experiences as a trans men, i as a person deeply love and value trans women (as we all should). and yeah, fuck buck angel and every other person like him.
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im-a-goddamn-cat · 3 days
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I found your post "sorry (not) sorry" where you talk about asexuality and aces who say they love sex etc.
That post ended up on my "for you" and I'm glad it did. I wrote a reply in that post but I was typing too quickly and it was a mess. So I deleted it and decided to write a message instead.
I have to say that I agree with your post 100% and it's quite sad that your opinion is "problematic" in ace community.
Can aces have sex? Yes. Some say they do it solely to please their partners, which sounds very RAPEY. It's interesting how little we hear about the allosexual individuals, who might masturbate instead of having sex with their asexual partners.
Nowadays, it seems like everyone is obsessed with labels and twisting words to fit their own narrative. I'm not against labels, just use labels that fit you. A lot of times I feel like allos just use asexual label so they can preach how they love sex & they can show aces that they can love sex too like every other "normal" person.
Sometimes when I see someone talking how they never want sex or that they are sex repulsed there always have to be some "ace" that screams BUT DON'T FORGET ACES LOVE SEX TOO! WE LOVE KINK! WE LOVE FUCKING!!!
It feels like you're being erased, but erased by someone who's not even asexual.
I come to ace tags a lot, because I would like to follow some people, (also I come to the tags a lot so I can block bots that started spamming the tags) but it's always the same story. I see people who say they are ace but they also say things that show me that they are pretty much allos. It's sad because these people made me avoid ace spaces... because it really feels like 60% of them are allos who just use ace label. 30% are aces who don't want to be rude and they're like "all are welcome, all can use ace label!!! No one can tell you that you're not ace" and then 10% people just don't say a word because they don't want drama.
This is why people won't take us seriously because a lot of people who don't know much about asexuality hear just "I'm ace but I still love and enjoy sex!. And this is why some people think being celibate and being asexual is the same thing.
Sorry for a long message & my rant but it's RARE that someone who's ace actually say things you said in that post out loud... and it's refreshing to see that.
I don't really know how much we have in common but I will follow you just so I can read more of your ace posts in the future. Because I really need that.
thank you so much for sending this message, i'm really glad that my post resonated with you. and i agree with everything you said. it's awful that the asexual label/community has been overtaken by this narrative that aces can have sex even tho it's just false. it's actually pretty scary bc, like you said, it sounds so rapey. you rarely hear ppl adovacting for allos to have sex just to please their partner or for allos to have sex with ppl they aren't attracted to bc everyone recognizes how disgusting that is, but for some reason, ppl think it's normal and okay to do this to ace ppl.
i hate being one of those ppl who tries to tell others what their identity is but i truly do feel like ppl who claim that their ace but still want/enjoy sex aren't actually ace, they're allosexual who decided to call themself ace for some reason. asexual ppl do not experience sexual attraction so they would not be seeking out sex with ppl nor would they enjoy it. if someone claims they enjoy sex despite being ace, i feel like there's a good chance that they're not actually ace.
i've also seen the argument that "asexuality is a spectrum" for why aces can have sex but i'm gonna be honest, it seems more like it's allosexuality that is the spectrum; there's only one way to not experience sexual attraction (asexual) but there's many different ways to experience sexual attraction and there's nothing wrong with that but it doesn't mean you're asexual. if you experience sexual attraction, you're not asexual.
i've also seen ppl get harassed for saying that they're asexual which means they don't want to have sex and/or dislike sexual content and i've experienced that myself. i've made posts just talking about my own sexuality and have had multiple ppl who jumped in to try "correcting" me by telling me that aces can have sex, which again is false, and it just shows how creepy this attitude is bc why do ppl always feel the need to try forcing this mindset onto any actual asexual person they come across? it really feels like ppl are just trying to pressure ace ppl into forcing themselves to conform to allosexual society's standards.
anyways, i think you hit the nail right on the head, you're so right about everything. it seems that even the ace community has been overtaken by a compulsory sexuality and rape culture mindset and it's so sad. this is supposed to be a community for ppl to celebrate and bond over their identity and yet you have so many ppl either trying to coerce asexual ppl into having sex and/or ppl who aren't even asexual who are claiming the label and twisting it for their own weird narrative.
thank you so much again. 💕 ik it sucks and it makes me sad and angry that ppl do this awful stuff too but always remember that there is nothing wrong with who we are and that we should try to stay positive and fight against ppl's acephobia as much as possible. 💕
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wingzie · 3 months
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Hi.
Your experience as a Jikookers is the same as the experience of Taekookers. Extreme shippers fighting and having meltdowns on the TL make a lot of people equate the unit name with these behaviors.
Sadly the first thought that came to my mind when Jimin mentioned JK is that tkk would make a scene about it. Instead of just feeling relief they are doing well, or just comfort we're getting news, I felt dread. And the worst is I was right.
I'm really struggling with the state of the fandom now, especially twitter fandom. People say you just have to curate your online experience and most sane armys are just taking a break from SNS and everything will get better once the guys start coming back from MS. I'm not this optimistic.
I've been thinking finding fellow ARMY irl could be better. But there's still a good chance to meet someone you would block straight away online.
I'm not a very social person. I used to come online to find people remisniscing, celebrating, sharing.. There's always been hating but now it feels like it's only hating (and comparing numbers). There was a clear shift from COVID on. It's not just solo endeavors and MS. You said it, how the way to handle things has changed.
I don't know how to fend off all the negativity any more than I know how to casually meet ARMY offline. I dream of an ARMY community manager, of a campaign about mental heal, abusive relationships (how many think they know better than the members what's good for them and think they are actually showing love and support when they are just being abusive), how to make the parasocial relationship a positive thing, etc.... A lot of these people who make ARMY spaces unbreathable actually need help.
Hi Anon! I'm sorry you feel this way. I feel like some Army experienced feelings of anger or betrayal since the Festa Dinner, which has made them unfairly lash out on the members. Some cannot cope that we lost an aspect of control, but this has always been the members decision and we have to accept that with respect. As I said in my other post, the heart of Army is massively the same. Just this morning I saw a Tweet about the Purple Ocean from Muster and it reminded me of the Flashlight project during PTD. There will ALWAYS be discourse online. That is the reason for it's existence. I am in other fandoms and they all suffer from the same issues since Covid and Elon. However, for every "bad" person or post, there are plenty of good ones out there. If you look for then. I mentioned to someone yesterday that it's like when people always leave awful reviews for a bad meal, but very rarely mention when they have a good meal. That's why I always try to find a balance. Both Jimin and Namjoon have told us over the years to not engage with negativity and I have always taken those words to heart. Things in online spaces have changed, but I guess I am more of a fighter and optimist. For each negative post I see, I spend more time posting/repositing posts that spread positivity or praise. I see no point in boosting some random February 2024 account sprewing hate. We have to be responsbile or our own spaces and I DO think things will improve once Jin returns. There's still that shared joy and excitement whenever a member posts or content comes out. It's just that the negative is less contained than it used to be. As for events offline. My first event was for a local screening of one of the concerts. I then attended a few events for members Birthday's. With the HYYH anniversay coming up, maybe you could look into seeing if there's any events for it? It's also Sope's Birthday soon and I plan to go to events for each of their Birthday's, so that could also be an option. However, if you dont' feel comfortable going in person, then that is perfectly acceptable. I'm sure there will be no judgement! We all have our own ways. For example, I always buy a mini cake for each members' Birthday haha. Though I had some negative experiences offline, there have been some really good ones. That's just how things are and then you can take the steps to protect yourself afterwards. I'm actually going to another event with the same group I mentioned before. If it doesn't go well, then I will just leave. If things have improved, then I will stay and enjoy myself. I understand it's not easy though, especially when we have certain expectations. Please do look after yourself though and feel free to DM me if you wish to discuss further. Much Love Wingzie/Becca
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