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#that was deadpool reference
madamerebloger · 1 year
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Double trouble 👁👁
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When viewer thinks they're safe⤴️
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oldfangirl81 · 8 months
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Excuse me? Is that a Sterek reference in my Deadpool!?! I cackled so hard. (Deadpool #7)
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supine-ly · 1 year
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Hyper fixated on this hero au rn 
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novakiart · 7 months
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gotta nurse the baby boy back to health, part iv (prev) | (next)
🕷️ written by me & nevi
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wwwilson · 9 days
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where we droppin, DP?
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brewed-pangolin · 2 months
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*steps on stage*
*taps mic*
"Happy International Women's Day. I want to peg Captain MacTavish."
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I'm going out tonight, but perhaps I'll try to whip something up later on when I get back
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libraryofgage · 8 months
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SpiderPool Steddie Part 3
Part One | Part Two
Welcome back to Steddie secret identity shenanigans ;)
This part is kinda long, but it's helping set up stuff for future parts lmao
As always, if you see any typos no you didn't
It's a beautiful day in the city: the birds are chirping, a nice breeze is blowing the smell of coffee over the streets instead of trash, and there are just enough clouds to create consistent patches of shade as they block the sun.
It's the perfect day for being out and about, the perfect day for Steve to meet Eddie at a coffee shop and flirt his way to lunch as well.
He just wishes Vecna hadn't gotten the fucking memo, too. And, if he had to get the memo, Vecna could have at least had the decency to cause problems in the evening. Seriously, it's just basic manners to not cause chaos and mayhem the same day Steve has a date.
Of course, to make it all worse, Vecna chose to let his demobats attack while Steve was on the way to said date. Not even the 30-minute buffer from leaving his apartment early will help him here, not when he has to knock the demobats out with his nail-bat, keep citizens safe, and not get himself eaten at the same time.
Maybe the worst part, though, is that Steve didn't get the chance to text Eddie that he'd be late before hastily ducking into an alley, haphazardly shoving his clothes into his backpack while tugging his mask over his head, and securely webbing his bag to the underside of a fire escape.
Steve thinks of his phone tucked into his backpack as he sends a demobat flying before it can attack a civilian trying to run away. He waves to the woman, returns the fist bump the toddler in her arms offers, and then dashes to catch up with the main swarm of the demobats. He shoots a web at a streetlamp and tugs sharply, using the momentum to send himself into the air. Once Steve is off the ground, he uses his webs to swing from building to building.
Fighting demobats is always the same routine: aggressively flapping wings, unholy screeching, claws and fangs tearing at Steve's suit as he tries to balance swinging past buildings and swinging his nail-bat. With each swipe of talons across Steve's suit, he tries to think of a plausible explanation he can give Eddie when he finally gets to the coffee shop.
A demobat dives into his face, resulting in a sharp pain across the bridge of his nose, and Steve is trying to figure out if walking into a doorway is a plausible excuse when he hears a familiar voice shout, "Yo, Spidey!"
Steve blinks, completely messes up the timing to web the next building, and suddenly starts to free-fall as demobats continue to swarm around him. He curses under his breath, catching himself on a streetlamp and wincing at the harsh yank to his shoulders.
"Oh, shit, sorry!"
Yep, definitely the person he thought it was. Steve swings off the streetlamp, landing in a crouch in front of Eddie. He spins around as he pops up, swinging at a pair of demobats that dove after him. "Hey, man, you should get outta here. You don't wanna get hurt," he says, glancing over his shoulder to look at Eddie.
Eddie just flashes a grin and shrugs. "I won't get hurt, remember?" he asks, holding up his hand and wiggling his fingers. Steve blinks, recalling the super-fast healing of Eddie's hand after he stuck a few nails through it.
"Right," Steve says, frowning slightly under the mask. He hears a shout a few feet away and doesn't think twice before sprinting toward it. There's a group of kids huddled together, trying to use their backpacks to smack away the demobats currently dive-bombing them. None of them look older than twelve, and the worst part is that Steve recognizes one of them as Dustin. He pushes himself to run faster, trying to ignore the guilt he feels at letting the demobats get near Dustin and his friends in the first place.
That guilt is for later when he can curl up under his blanket and try to tell himself that he's just doing his best and he's only one person and...man, being a hero is tough.
Dustin happens to look over as Steve is about to reach them. Despite the situation, he lights up, relief visibly washing over him. "Spider-Man!" he shouts, forgetting about keeping the bats away with his bag long enough to wave erratically like Steve hasn't already seen him.
"Hang tight!" Steve tells him, sliding behind the group and crawling up the side of the building there. He sticks to the side and takes note of the trees on either side of the kids, a vague plan starting to form in his mind. He just needs to get the bats to leave the kids alone long enough for it to work.
Just as Steve is about to throw himself into the fray as bait, he notices Eddie scramble up one of the trees by the kids, scoot out along one of the sturdier branches, and pull the guitar case off his back. He grins at the kids, winking at Dustin before swinging the guitar case like a bat. He's got a much wider range than Steve's nail-bat, and he manages to sweep most of the demobats away in two swings.
Steve sighs with relief; this is much better than the plan he had half-formed in his brain. He jumps off the building and lands next to the group of kids. "Don't just stand there!" he says, gaining their attention as he herds them toward an alley that lets out onto a street that isn't swarming with demobats.
And then, because Steve can't fucking help himself when Dustin walks by, he leans down and whispers, "Aren't you supposed to be in school right now?"
Dustin blinks. "We get attacked by demobats, and that's the first thing you ask?"
"Don't avoid the question, Henderson. I will tell your mother," Steve hisses, more upset that Dustin encountered danger in the first place.
His tension must be more obvious than he thought because Dustin sighs and raises his hand in surrender. "Geez, fine, we wanted pizza for lunch. But we'll head back now, okay? I'll even text you a picture of the school when we get there," he promises, flashing a grin from the edge of the alley before running to catch up with his friends.
It will have to be good enough. Besides, Steve doesn't exactly have time for arguing; his spider senses start screaming not a second later. He whips around in time to see the demobats attack Eddie and his branch. Steve feels his heart drop into his stomach as he runs back to the trees.
The branch breaks when he's a few feet away, and without thinking, he shoots a web at Eddie and yanks as hard as he can.
Later, Steve will look back on this moment and realize he might, in fact, be just a tiny bit dumb. If he took even a second to review the facts, he'd have realized Eddie 1) wasn't even ten feet off the ground and 2) could heal himself at an exponentially faster rate than Steve.
Steve realizes none of that in the moment, though. So what he gets is Eddie crashing right into him, his guitar case digging painfully into Steve's stomach and his elbow jabbing the side of Steve's neck and his boot just two centimeters from neutering Steve free of charge.
He lands roughly on the concrete, a dull pulse of pain beginning to radiate from his tailbone. Steve winces, groaning as Eddie rolls off him and hurriedly says, "Holy fuck, sorry, Spidey. Are you okay?"
Steve groans again, trying to shake off his disorientation. "Yep, all good, totally fine, quick question," Steve says, taking the hand Eddie offers to help him up, "What the hell were you thinking jumping in like that?"
"That some kids needed saving? I don't know, man, I didn't really think. It's not like they could really hurt me," Eddie replies, shrugging as he glances over at the trees again.
His subsequent frown makes Steve realize that, oh yeah, there are fucking demobats. He tenses and follows Eddie's gaze only to find absolutely nothing there. Steve blinks, wondering if he's hallucinating somehow, and walks over to the trees.
Broken branch? Check. Webs that will dissolve in a few hours? Check. Splatters of demobat blood on the concrete? Check.
The demobats themselves? Nowhere to be fucking seen.
"Where'd they go?" Eddie asks, looking at Steve like he'll somehow know, and Steve has to suppress the urge to reply with something snarky. Snark for the sake of being mean isn't nearly as fun as snark for the sake of banter.
Steve takes a deep breath and shakes his head. "Not sure. I'll patrol the area and surrounding blocks," he says, trying to hide how confused he is. It's not like the demobats to fly away before Steve has lowered their numbers by at least half. Something feels wrong, but he has no clue what the actual problem might be.
"Right," Eddie says, sliding a foot back and smiling apologetically at Steve. "Well, I gotta run. Got that coffee date with Stevie. But share all the fun details about your patrol the next time you're on the roof!"
And with that, Eddie rushes off, absolutely clueless that he's about to get a text from Steve apologizing for running so late that at least an hour will pass before he can make it to the coffee shop.
Steve sighs, pushes down the guilt that builds in his stomach for a completely different reason now, and scales the side of a nearby building so he can start swinging through the surrounding blocks.
----
Steve really did spend an hour looking for any sign of the demobats before swinging back to where he stashed his bag. Thankfully, Steve has become an expert at changing into regular clothes in mere seconds. There aren't too many wrinkles in his polo or his jeans, and his high-tops aren't bent, which is even more of a relief.
Once he's changed, Steve swings his bag onto his back and dashes toward the coffee shop. Eddie might have texted back after Steve's first message that he was okay with waiting, but that doesn't mean Steve is going to make him wait any longer than necessary. Plus, he can't shake the anxiety that Eddie might decide Steve isn't worth waiting for and leave.
At least he had plenty of time to come up with a believable lie.
Steve practically rams into the door of the coffee shop, catching himself just in time to yank it open instead. He tries to get control of his breathing, his heart pounding against his chest as he looks around the shop before seeing Eddie waving at him from a corner table, his guitar case slung across the back of his chair.
A wave of relief surges through Steve, and he walks toward Eddie with a grin. "Hey," he says, barely holding back a grimace at how breathy he sounds, "sorry for taking so long."
Eddie waves his hand dismissively before gesturing to the seat across from him. "Don't worry about it, Stevie. Is that--" Eddie gestures once again, this time pointing at Steve's face "--what held you up?"
Steve blinks as he sits, raising a hand to his cheek. He winces slightly at the burst of pain. Right. The demobats had managed to get a few hits in, not to mention Eddie crashing into him at the end. "It's, uh, kind of a funny story, actually," Steve says. He drops his hand to the table, only then noticing the iced coffees in front of him and Eddie. "How long ago did you order?"
"The coffees just got here," Eddie replies, nudging the one in front of Steve toward him once he's sat.
Their fingers brush together when Steve reaches out to take the cup, and he can't help noticing how Eddie's rings are surprisingly warm, like he's been fiddling with them. He also can't help noticing a speck of dried blood at the base of Eddie's thumb. He frowns slightly, forgetting about the drink to gently rub at the spot. "What happened? Are you okay?" he asks.
He misses Eddie's grin but not how Eddie twists his hand so he can grab Steve's, boldly lacing their fingers together. "How about this, sweetheart," he says, leaning forward to prop his chin in his free palm, "You tell that funny story, and I'll tell you about how I heroically helped save a bunch of kids."
Steve already knows about that, though, and he's flustered enough over their hands to almost say it.
Almost.
He stops himself at the last second, grateful that his blush can still be attributed to Eddie, and clears his throat. He picks up his coffee, takes an experimental sip, and relaxes some as vanilla and coffee coat his mouth. "I had to babysit last night and into this morning. One of the single moms on my floor, Carla, had an emergency shift, so I had her toddler, Miguel, until this morning. Carla was running almost an hour late to pick him up, so I started playing with Miguel to keep him occupied. And then he threw one of his Hot Wheels at my face and it cut my nose," he explains, gesturing to the slash across the bridge of his nose.
"Was it at least one of the cool ones?" Eddie asks, amusement obvious in his voice.
Steve snorts. "They're all cool, I'll have you know," he says, shaking their hands and hoping Eddie doesn't notice how sweaty his palm is becoming. "Anyway, Miguel apparently thinks my pain is the funniest thing ever because he starts giggling so hard he falls over. And once he finally stops laughing, he throws more of his Hot Wheels at me!
"So there I am, stuck in a Hot Wheels fight with a toddler and losing, when Carla finally comes to pick him up. She takes one look at the cuts on my face and immediately starts apologizing and trying to convince me Vix will somehow make them heal faster while trying to shove like three twenty-dollar bills into my pocket, even though I'd already told her she didn't need to pay me."
Eddie's grin widens, and he leans in closer, the ends of his hair brushing against the table. Steve has to fight the urge to tuck the strands behind Eddie's ear, which he does by taking another sip of his coffee. "What, did Carla somehow cop a feel?" Eddie asks, waggling his eyebrows playfully.
Steve barks out a laugh, almost choking on his coffee. "She almost did," he admits, "but she managed to get the money in my pocket first. I slipped it back, of course."
"Of course," Eddie says, nodding once.
"Anyway, I finally get them to go, but then they keep coming back because Miguel keeps realizing he left one of his Hot Wheels behind. Between finding, like, 30 Hot Wheels and trying to get ready to meet you and Carla being chismosa, as she calls it, I didn't manage to leave my apartment for another hour and a half."
Eddie hums softly, his smile having gotten soft while Steve was talking. "You know, I had a feeling you were good with kids," he says, and the statement would have caught Steve off-guard if he hadn't already heard it from behind his mask earlier.
"What gave you that idea?" he asks.
"Just something about you."
Steve finds himself wondering what, exactly, about him gives off that vibe, but he doesn't ask for now. "What about you?" he asks like he doesn't already know, "What's this heroic story?"
Eddie practically lights up, and Steve wonders how long he's been crafting the perfect retelling of the story in his head. "Well, first of all, how do you feel about Spider-Man?" Eddie asks.
"Uh, he's cool, I guess," Steve says, a little thrown by the sudden question. Though, when he thinks about the story Eddie is about to tell, the question does make sense. "He does a lot for the city, and his web shooters are really cool, but I don't follow him super closely."
"Well, yours truly helped Spider-Man save a group of kids from a demobat attack today," Eddie says, his chest puffing out slightly and his expression practically begging for Steve to look impressed.
And the image is so endearing that Steve can't help playing along. He widens his eyes, perks up a little in his seat, and says, "Seriously?! Wasn't that, like, dangerous?"
"Danger is my middle name, Stevie. I mean, it kinda comes with the whole heavy metal thing," Eddie explains, winking at Steve.
Steve raises an eyebrow at that. "Okay, you should definitely explain that next, but what about Spider-Man?" he asks.
That gets Eddie back on track, and Steve finds himself relaxing as Eddie talks. He plays along to the story, gasping in the appropriate places, looking awed when Eddie tells him about beating away the demobats with his guitar case, and laughing when Eddie plays up the comedy of crashing into Spider-Man.
And it's easy once Steve stops overthinking. Being with Eddie, laughing at his jokes and flirting back and holding his hand the whole time is wonderfully, blissfully, incredibly easy.
He could get used to this.
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Tag List (there's still room, so let me know if you'd like to be added!)
@soaringornithopter, @suikatto, @murdblurdock, @starman-jpg, @somegirlsomewhere, @heaven428, @vacantwatchers, @sidebarre, @swimmingbirdrunningrock, @imjust-that-shy, @spookednsaucy, @7shrewsinatrenchcoat, @fanshipper4ever, @amrice, @spectrum-spectre,
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punch-love · 1 year
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give me all your time
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luimnigh · 1 year
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...the sliding timescale must really screw with Gwenpool's head.
Time in the Marvel Universe doesn't run at the same rate as it does in the real world. It averages out to about 1 Marvel Year to 4 Real Years, but it's never really that clean of a conversion.
In Gwenpool Strikes Back, Gwen explains that she was 19 when she arrived in the Marvel Universe in 2015, and that at time of publishing (2020-2021), she's... still 19.
Presumably, she's still 19 now. Which would suck if Krakoa's bars use the US drinking age.
Anyway, this means in theory, Gwen remembers that the year of her birth is simultaneously 1996 and 2004.
That's the difference between being just old enough to remember 9/11, and being too young to remember the first Twilight movie.
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syrooo · 2 days
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jellybeanium124 · 8 months
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honestly. cringe is dead. they should go for it. they should. include "take on me" in season 2 cowards. I hope they do. I want it in there. name a song that's more 80s you can't.
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spiderdanny · 1 year
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Do you remember REDPOOL ?
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And what about SPIDER-CHUCK
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And what about...
Spideypool with them (I have problems Yes)
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mainly-marvel · 10 months
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OH. MY. GOD.
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bloodmoon24 · 2 years
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Ironman: SpiderMan, guess who’s here
SpiderMan: My date
Ironman: Your husband
SpiderMan: I don’t have a husband. Call the police
Deadpool: *came in* Your future husband!
SpiderMan: I’ll call the police 😑
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ryyuuiiko · 10 months
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his aunt woke up while taking a nap so spider-man scolded deadpool (" ´ー`) also i can't draw flowers so don't mind that ˊᗜˋ
(spider-man isn't underage in this!)
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practically-an-x-man · 9 months
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realizing Paul Wernick and Rhett Reese (who wrote 6 Underground) also wrote all three of the Deadpool movies is only confirmation that One introducing himself as "Mr. Worthington" during the espionage scene is ONE HUNDRED PERCENT an intentional choice and not just random chance
like cmon. i thought the superhero jokes were funny enough but it's even better to learn that the writers also worked on multiple x-men franchise movies. and you just know that they're looking at their cast and looking at their script and going 'oh yeah. this is gonna make the nerds very happy'
well, sirs, this nerd is very happy. i love niche in-jokes like that
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