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youdontloveme-yet · 7 months

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It seems people around here need a bit of an insight on the events that are happening in the Middle East currently. (btw, there has been a devastating earthquake in Afghanistan, which also needs attention) I will compile what my friend has said since this genocide started and what they're basically being forced to live through. Excuse me, survive through.

07.10.23: First thing my friend sent me in the morning was this:

Saying the bombings have not stopped since 6am, while he texted me this photo at 8am. He said there're bombs and rockets flying in different directions from all over Gaza. Be it by Hamas or IDF doesn't matter. Our conversation continues to me witnessing a 22 year old man breaking down, wishing this was just a bad dream. A little while later as I bombard him with questions about the situation and what they're saying on the news and whatnot he simply said:

When I asked if there are any protocols for civilians:

As the day went on and I had to function like an actual person and go to work, in the evening I asked if his family has emergency plans.

And asked for shelters.

He joked about the situation. We joked about the situation. You know, to keep the normalcy rather than making it worse for everybody. He didn't sleep that night. I couldn't stop crying through the entire day and night.

08.10.23: First thing is the morning is to see if he's okay. Still alive, still joking about it. I asked about the bombing and he tells me they've been going on every few minutes through the entire night. We continue speaking through the entire day, as I cannot stop shaking nor crying, because I am absolutely fucking useless and helpless.

Is what comes out as he is barely holding up, amidst joking around. He still asks me about my day, why I am scheduling therapy, if I have eaten anything and so on. Regardless the fact that he is now in an active warzone with very big prospects of him dying. So, I think you can paint a picture of the type of person he is. I try to keep our conversations light and normal, as they usually are, so as he doesn't lose his mind. He send me pictures of his cat and growing a stress beard. We joke around and keep up the normalcy as much as possible. We go back and forth with how he will not get rid of me especially in this situation. With him constantly telling me it's not worth it and how I'll only get hurt. As you can imagine I legit do not care, since I will stick with him 'till the very end. We continue going in circles with why I shouldn't get attached or how he's happy to see my ugly mug, some innuendos being throw around and whatnot. Every night I tell him to stay safe as if he has any power over it. In the evening I ask if he needs some distraction, either to talk or play games. He played a few games with the rest of the server, you know, to keep his sanity. I keep sending memes and stupid shit to keep it light. We got to the point where we started talking about books, so I ask him for his favourite:

I unfortunately literally passed out after our book conversation, as I was fatigued from crying and shaking all day.

09.10.23: In the morning he tells me he is alive and doing okay-ish. After which we continue with the back and forth of "it's a waste of time to stress about me". I ask about his family, how I'll love and support him even if he commits war crimes and whatnot. To which he continues to answer with stuff like this:

Well, we both know is a bit too late to not get attached. :)

There is something so viscerally horrifying when a big, strong man tells you he is scared. There is something so incredibly painful, when the person you've grown attached to tells you he is scared. I cannot even start to explain how my heart sunk and the most abusive and profound sadness nested itself in my chest. I woke up every hour during that night, even though I smoked enough weed to keep me asleep for a week. And I woke up in terror every fucking hour of the night.

10.10.23: He's alive and well. As well as someone can be in his situation. Hadn't slept all night, but is alive. We continue our usual banter and jokes through the day. Later he apologizes for forgetting that I am going to therapy. We talk about flowers, because he loves flowers and we both need distraction. As we keep talking he casually throws in how he finally has his meds. Which to me is weird, because he hadn't mentioned any pills before. And this is how I learn he is on anti-depressants since his brother killed himself the previous year. He hadn't told anyone else. I will here remind that he is not even 22 yet and has gone through absolute shit. By absolute shit I mean the worst things imaginable. For example, he shared in the server how he witnessed a rocket split a person in half, nearly killing his brother when he was only 14 years old. Later on I had the small victory of making him laugh, while bombs were still raining on them. We even played a game that night. Then the horrors continued:

I left him to his own vices for that time, as I knew anything I'd say would make it only worse. When I spoke to him next he had calmed down, even tho he was battling his demons. Even made him smirk with a pun. And the dread came back in full power after.

So, as you can imagine, knowing that the person you most deeply care about doesn't want to exist is absolutely and irrevocably devastating. I do not recall if this was the same night, when he told us they started using white phosphorus rockets, but it might as well have been the same night. I would like to remind here that white phosphorus is banned as a weapon and is allowed only to use for smoke screen. While in this case they were launching rockets full of it towards houses and entire neighbourhoods. The whole idea behind it is that if a person doesn't die from an entire building collapsing, they will either suffocate or literally melt due to the phosphorus. Which automatically means that they cannot identify victims or have claims that a child has been killed. It is a very old tactic used in the majority of devastating wars.

So, here I will ask all the zionists and racists, how can a person like this be dubbed a terrorist? How can a person, who cares more about my well-being, while being actively under siege, a fucking terrorist? With what consciousness do you call all Palestinians terrorists? What goes through your silly little minds to support Israel in slaughtering such people?? Palestine is 2mil people, 55% of which are children. The average age in the country is 18. And people still dare to say that they are animals, subhuman and terrorists. You have no actual evaluation of what is right and wrong, if you cannot get it through your thick skulls that Hamas is but a fraction of Palestine, while the rest 90+ percent of people are just like you and me. Have you no empathy for those who have been subjected to severe ethnic cleansing for 80 fucking years? Because you all had sympathy for Ukraine when Russia attacked, but when it is not white fucking people, it is not a genocide, it's the colonial state of Israel defending themselves.

I will end this here for now, as I have to pretend to be a functioning person and work. I will continue this when I can.

Peace and may your Gods save your souls when karma comes for you. Everyone else, stay safe :)

#palestine diaries #palestine #tw: war

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yakumtsaki · 2 years

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Welcome to Generation 4, and no spoilers but what the fuck. For reasons that will become obvious, I have to start this generation with a culminative update on everyone post-college. We begin, as all bad things do, in the main house. Sophito and Eliza have been invited over so we can ask their dumb asses to move in (since we’re over the household limit, fml) but we’ve ran into the problem of them refusing to get out of the hot tub.

-So babe, after we bang in the hot tub do you wanna knock my new teeth implants out? -You know it! -SOPHITO GET OUT ALREADY SO I CAN ASK YOU TO MOVE IN -In a minute, mom, gawd!

-Do you think your mom will like me, Soph? -I can’t see how she wouldn’t after watching us have sex in her hot tub!

-Great job knocking my son’s teeth out, Eliza! -Thank you, Mrs. Miguel! -Please, call me Mom!

LOL ya I had a feeling you two violent lunatics would hit it off.

In case you were wondering, Shajar remains THE WORST. Cyneswith is more excited to see Sophito again than his own mother is.

-Welcome home, son! You made your mama proud with all that hoeing, huhu!🌸

-CYN, ARE YOU AWARE THAT SOMEONE IS MAKING OUT IN OUR HOUSE THAT ISN’T YOU AND iVAN?!? IS THAT EVEN LEGAL???

Ah, it’s like we never left!

Jojo is unironically 106yo so it’s wedding time, no time to draw this out at all.

-This wedding looks like garbage >:(

Excuse me?? I even got you those Celebration balloon chairs, I normally get the cheap garden ones and call it a day. If I even bother getting chairs at all, that is!

-I don’t care!!! I want my dream wedding!!!

Ya, best we can do around here is your dream divorce.

-Oh Sophito, standing here with you, in front of our families who don’t give a fuck and June in a wedding dress, brings up so many emotions.. Mainly the urge to scream hysterically.. -It’s gonna be ok babe, just stay calm. Focus on me and the fact I managed to not pop the collar on my wedding suit!

Awww, congrats guys!

-What the fuck is your mother wearing?

LOL sorry I forgot to change her formalwear!

-It’s still better than June’s.

I SAID I’M SORRY

Despite some small sartorial problems, this is actually one of the better weddings we’ve ever thrown? There’s smustling..

..brotherly reunions..

..more brotherly reunions..

..and a zombie vs robot deathmatch! I don’t know what more Liz wanted, tbh.

A great wedding, if I say so myself!

-It was not.

Whatever! Time to move on!

Daniel reunites with his bebes and meets their intendeds, who have moved in next door!

-Blue Meatballs, what a throwback! Going from my brother to my daughter.. Wow, I REALLY don’t know how I feel about that.

Let me help, you feel happy!

-Do I though?

Yes, because June is happy, God help us.

-Ok then!

June’s little sisters idolizing her is SO CUTE I CANNOT..

..it also makes perfect sense as Cleo and Cecilia are the biggest fucking nerds I’ve ever played, I think I’m legit gonna go in a Curious Bros direction with them.

We leave Daniel in perpetual happiness with Tara and his human and cat bebes-

-and move to Asshole Manor! Ok you two, take a break.

-What? But that’s only the 8th time we’ve banged today!

IT CAN WAIT.

-It really can’t, we’re 90yo!

Ya exactly, so the time has come..

..to reconnect, and in Gunther’s case, MEET your kids. Reginald stop thinking about crypto FOR 1 SECOND GOOD LORD

It quickly becomes apparent that we’re dealing with a level of estrangement that a few visits aren’t gonna fix, so it’s time for Gun and Mel to take their kids on a vacation! Isn’t this exciting, kids?

-Fuck our lives💜 -I’m a woman of science but I kept praying for our plane to crash. -It’s only 3 days, guys, how bad can it be? -Our rooms have no computers, Reginald. -That’s not a thing, then people wouldn’t be able give financial advice on the internet! -Ya, they are not. -YOU’RE LYING. GET AWAY FROM ME

-Listen son, this isn’t easy for me to say.. -It’s ok, dad, I think I know what you’re thinking. -Then would you please get out so I can bang Melody in this sauna?

-Let’s go, kiddos, this is gonna be fun! -Uh, mom, where’s the pilot?💜 -I’m the pilot! -Since when?? -Since this very morning when I took a class! I’ve topped 7 careers, how hard can this be?

-I am relaxed.. I do not need to give financial advice on the internet..

-I am centered.. I do not need to give financial advice on the internet..

-I am floating.. I do not need to give financial advice on the internet.. -Hey kid, any suggestions on what to order around here? -You mean.. ADVICE on how to ALLOCATE your meal BUDGET?!?

How’s it going, JuJu?

-Having a lot of fun eating soup with chopsticks💜 -Can we go home already? I’m losing career momentum, at this rate I won’t be Chief of Staff by age 23!

Fine, fine, we’ve made some valuable bonding progress already:

-Aaaaah, isn’t this great? -It sure is, mom!💜 -How many ‘get promoted’ wants do I need to roll before you take a hint? -You know, June, you get your workaholism from me! -Oh ok then, that definitely makes up for being a teen girl growing up without a mother!

OOF, ok this will take some time, let’s check out.

We return home and June straight tops the medical career-

-AT THIS AGE. I CANNOT. You know what will make this day even better??

HUHU💙🧆

We’re officially Blueballed! Man, that doesn’t sound right. Look at Melody in her matching teal dress, supportive queen!

-It seems like yesterday I was trying to break Lakshmi and Gunther up, and now here she is, marrying my daughter!

Ok, legit let’s not think too hard about this because it’s very upsetting. Julian and Stacy I’ve decided I will not marry since they don’t want to and they’re married in their 💜s anyway. Next household..

..and I’m gonna let this picture speak for itself. I found out something genuinely shocking: BRIT AND HALF-ALIEN PROF ARE BFFS. Like they’ve been friends since BEFORE Trista banged Gunther, in her memory panel she become besties with Brit first?? Wtf.

-We’re gonna be family now, isn’t that exciting, Brit Brit? -OH YA, IT’S EVERY MOTHER’S DREAM: HER SON GROWING UP AND MARRYING HER BEST FRIEND -I know, right? -THIS IS SICK! -You’re on to talk, Castor, he’s probably into older women because of you and Brit! -BRIT WASN’T MY PROFESSOR, TRISTA -I wasn’t Reginald’s professor either, I’m an art prof! So I’m broke to boot! -I’m gonna go lie down. -Ya, right behind you, darling, but I think I’m gonna vomit first! Which is a shame because I just ate some excellent quail’s legs!

Brit is acting up against this marriage like a rebellious teen, soaping her own gaudy fountain.

-That will teach Reginald!

It really won’t!

LOL @ SHOWING UP IN YOUR SWEATPANTS, COME ON BRIT

-I WILL NEVER ACCEPT THIS.

What about now that Reggie gave birth to a beautiful ginger half-alien bb named BRITANNICUS? (I figured Half Alien Prof knocking him up made canon sense, hehe.)

-Ok, I accept this🖤

Good! Time for our final household!

Sugar and Claire! They adopted a bunch of Wulf’s 30 pets and moved into this beautiful house that I of course didn’t build.

Sugar autonomously knocked Claire up the literal second they moved in so we had a shotgun wedding..

..catered by Claire!

-What are these salads you guys are eating?? -Oh uh.. we kinda brought them with us. -WHY -Uhh.. We don’t feel worthy of your food? -AWWWW. That’s true, you’re not!

Sugar actually started the military career at like level 8 thanks to his insane college grades and I was like wtf??

-I got fired :(

Ya, that’s more like it.

Claire is also doing shockingly well, she’s a lvl 9-

-And I’ll be a level 10 once I figure out how ovens work!

-and she gives birth to a beautiful bb whom Sophito attempts to kidnap after showing up uninvited, wtf. Anyway, the bb is a boy and I name him Spice! Now Claire has Sugar, Spice, and everything nice :)

I don’t know what drugs Sophito is clearly on because it appears he came over to legit.. help the new parents? Like he fed Spice and then started cleaning? Very shocking stuff in this family.

Sugar is a really good parent, I don’t know where the fuck he could have possibly learned this but it’s super cute!

AND HE TOPS HIS CAREER AND GETS THIS INSANE BONUS. YAS

I’m so proud of you!!! And boy was that cavalier hat doing a lot of heavy lifting when it came to your face.

Spice grows up and the Don nose claims another generation :(

-Ah, I’m so glad my son is learning this at age 2 and not age 12 like I did :)

Claire is skilling like crazy because let me tell you, she is UNQUALIFIED AS FUCK. Like legit Wyatt-tier when he started as a SWAT Team Leader and was missing half the necessary skill points..

..and it turns out to be a complete time waste because she tops her career by chance card LOL

Congrats, Claire!!!

-I knew I’d make it! Claire’s Frozen Meat Delights™ is going global!

It sure is! Globally banned! What a perfect day, I’m sure nothing will ruin it! Why am I hearing hearts??

Oh right, it’s because SUGAR IS BANGING JESSICA PICASSO WHOM HE BROUGHT OVER FROM WORK

WHAT THE FUCK SUGAR

-I couldn’t help it, we practically have the same face!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU OMG

-My genes!

BRUH. Real talk I legit didn’t know what the fuck to do with this, I haven’t felt as bad as I did for Claire since DANIEL. I think this is very true to life too, like how many hot girls ‘give a chance’ to some fug guy because he was nice/funny/whatever and he ends up cheating?? Fucking hell.

I quickly decide there’s no coming back from this because I even stopped Sugar and then he went back and BANGED JESSICA AGAIN and is full on in love with her:

ONE BOLT. 1 VS 3 WITH CLAIRE. I CANNOT WITH THIS LOSER-

-so I invite Jessica over so Claire can catch them, this is truly BULLSHIT.

Claire loves him so much she’s straight up heartfarting over him WHILE DIVORCING HIM. HE’S THE WORST

And poor Spice goes into aspiration failure because he had a fear of his parents divorcing, amazing! Great job, Sug!

-WAAAAAAAAH I CAN’T BELIEVE HAVING AN AFFAIR RUINED MY FAMILY, THAT’S NOT WHAT I LEARNED GROWING UP

GET OUT OF HERE SUGAR

Poor Claire immediately goes to teach Spice to talk so she can repair his aspiration..

..and beats up Jessica’s dumb ass. She then rolls the want to go on a date and I’m like don’t have to tell me twice:

WILFRED IS BACK LOL. Bro I still cannot fucking BELIEVE this has happened, Sugar was so loyal the entire time, I think once he got married it triggered the Cyn genes?? I have no other explanation for it.

Now the question arises, what the fuck to do with Sugar, because I’m not playing a single Sugar household. So, with a heavy heart:

-It’s ok, bro! -You’re not judging me for destroying my family for no reason whatsoever? :( -Of course not, who am I to judge?

-Sophito’s right, honey, your family, including your dad’s hot ass, will always be here for you with no judgment! Because we have absolutely no room to judge💗

-SUGAR YOU’RE A FUCKING DISGRACE. RUNNING OUT ON YOUR FAMILY LIKE A THIEF IN THE NIGHT, WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MATTER WITH YOU -I DIDN’T RUN, I WAS KICKED OUT! -SHUT YOUR STUPID TRAP. WE HAVE NOWHERE TO PUT YOU SO YOU’RE SLEEPING IN THE CRYPT WITH SANDY. NOW FUCK OUTTA HERE, I HAD TO INTERRUPT MY WOLF-WAITING TO BERATE YOU

Sugar happily heads off to work the next morning along with Sophito but I’m not seeing him getting in the car..

..and it’s because JOJO STOPPED HIM TO DO THAT AUTONOMOUS LECTURE INTERACTION. I CANNOT

-Listen here, you absolute disappointment, as long as I’m head of this family you’re gonna be paying rent to live in my crypt! -Well that won’t be very long, you’re 108! -Sophie is gonna be head after me, so good luck with that! Now fork over that 55k bonus!

-I don’t have that, Claire got it in the divorce! -YOU FUCKING WHAT. SO WHAT DO YOU HAVE -The 20k I moved in with :( -THAT’S AUTOMATIC -I know :( -GET OUT OF MY SIGHT

Welcome home, Sugar!

Same, Sandy, same.

#gen 4 #ts2

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nriacc · 2 years

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okay here’s my chapter reactions, i spent 4 days reading and i could never dream of what i was gonna get.

Hello new chapter i’m delusional and hopeful, very nice to meet you.

1. ohh happy birthday nriacc!! hope you can collapse my veins with beautiful alex and wheels and george content….

2. MOVED IN WITH GEORGE FOR A WBYLE OH GOD GEORGE 😭😭

3. oh damnnn matty and alex peace love and friendship era has ended

4. george calling her baby and complimenting the paintings i’m weak and on my knees for him

5. HES WANTS TO ASK HER OUT OMG / WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT DATING GEORGE TEAM LETS RALLY OUT TROOP I THINK IT COULD HAPPEN

6. okay but if bestie is there…could alex…also…be…there….

7. no stop please no talk of alex it hurts that didn’t happen he didn’t say anything he showed up to the date and everything went good and they’re happy and official now okay

8. ALEX IS THERE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 and not calling her angel WHY. hold it together don’t cry girl i feel you.

9. oh matty :(

10. Al / Alex / Shakespeare / Darling / Or whatever you fancy calling me this week x crying 😭

11. IS SHE GONNA KISS HIM FOR NEW YEARS

12. okay fine it’s fine they have to start as friends again and it needs time that fine that fine

13. matty brought gingerbread houses that’s cute. bestie behavior i hope

14. oh. oh. girl no get out of 2012, 2012 has been over for a long time. well. they’re kissing over there. Team matty can laugh, team Alex can only chuckle.

15. from your angel on alexs birthday gift oh man

16. oh matt

17. Alexs beard is gone

18. oh yes he has nice hands, very nice indeed maybe he could do something with them in this very long long drive

19. okay he’s still not calling her angel

20. OIII NO FUCKING FIGHTING AT MY GIG OMGGGG i cant believe that made it in the fic

21. danny who’s danny

22. okay who was danny i need a memory refresh but if wheels is mas then i’m mad too but danny WHO???

23. OH DANNY ZUKO AS IN ALEX OH

24. oh please have angry make up sex

25. IS ANGRY SEX HAPPENING RIGHT NOW, WILL TEAM ALEX FINALLY HAVE THE CHANCE TO LAUGH IS THIS WHAT WEVE BEEN WAITING FOR

26. IS THIS HAPPENING IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING

27. HE CALLED HER ANGEL AND THIS IS HAPPENING

28. I USED TO DREAM OF TIMES LIKE THESE

I FUCKING LOVE EVERY ONE OF THESE REACTIONS HAHAHHAAH IM LIVING FOR THIS THANK YOU SO MUCH!

1. Ahahahhaha I think I definitely succeeded in collapsing your veins with that content indeed ahhahaha

2. IMAGINE HOW NICE IT WOULD BE TO MOVE IN WITH GEORGEEE IM JEL OF HER

3. Defo gone out of the window that one

4. Honestly it makes me feel things I love him so much hahahaha

5. LEGIT I LOVE THEM SO MUCH TOGETHER IM DEFO DOING A GEORGE ENDING IT HAS TO HAPPEN

6. I love that you predicted this

7. Yessss thats what happened in my head too. nothing bad. only love and joy.

8. of course he cameeeeee. SO SAD HE DIDN’T CALL HER ANGEL FOR SO LONG THOUGH BE RIGHT BACK SOBBING

9. Bless the poor boy

10. I love him so much I cannot

11. AHHHHHHHH I LOVE THAT YOU PREDICTED THIS TOO

12. yessss indeed

13. HAHHAH the bestie behaviour line made me snort but it is bestie behaviour we love them

14. AAHAHHAHHAHHA SCREAMINGGGGGG

15. she legit was trying her hardest to make him say it bless her

16. DICK

17. thank fuck his depression beard has gone

18. AHHAHAHHA I WAS GOING TO DO THIS BUT I THOUGHT IT WOULD MAKE LATER ON BETTER IF IT ALL HAPPENED THEN

19. Do you understand why I had to make him wait to say it at the perfect moment ahahhaha

20. I HAD TO INCLUDE IT I WAS AT THE GIG HE SAID IT AT AND IT’S THE REASON I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. STILL CANT BELIEVE I LIVED THROUGH THAT ICONIC MOMENT TO BE HONEST

21/22/23. I AM LAUGHING IM SORRY

24. hehehehehe

25. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

26. ITS HAPPENING

27. AHHHHHHHH YASSSSSSS ANGEL IS BACK AND MORE IS ON THE WAY

28. YOU DON’T HAVE TO DREAM ANYMORE BECAUSE ITS HAPPENING. PART 27 IS HAPPENING AND ITS GOING TO BE PURE AND UTTER FILTH!!!!!!!!

thank you very much for your reactions I love them so very much

#nriacc ask #part 26 ask

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snappleapple · 3 years

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their favorite types of kisses

people in this - dream, georgenotfound, sapnap, wilbur, punz, jschlatt, awesamdude, quackity

headcanon!

the most disgusting fluff i’ve ever written

warning - cursing, i think that’s all but if there is more please do not hesitate to tell me :)

word count - 2k

a/n: okay okay, i might’ve lied earlier about that being my last post but this was short and easy to make which is why i would like to feed my readers this early haha. anyways, enjoy and please disregard the errors in this post, i hate proof reading anything lol. also, i’ve been very indecisive on the title and i might change it later and ooh, my masterlist will be made soon. i’ve just been feeling very unproductive these days. also, please put in requests, i am so bored and dumb therefore there are no ideas in this brain. and if you’d like a part 2, i might add more people for the part 2!anyways, peace!

dream -

i get the feeling that dream’s favorite type of kisses would be cheek kisses

he just likes to watch as you struggle to reach his height

“aw look at those little legs do their thing.”

ends up with you not giving him his kiss

and mans becomes SO pouty

“y/n…come on. don’t be this way.” :(

if you don’t kiss him on the cheek, will also become SO clingy and whiny

“why won’t you KISS ME!”

clenches his fists and stomps away like a teenage girl during puberty

slamming the door to your room

so then you have to go and give him all the kisses he wants

his face is slammed into your pillow

you sit on the side of the bed and pet his hair

leading him to stare up at you with puppy dog eyes

“i will give you all the kisses you want. so stop being so pouty, you big baby.”

will literally leave zero feet of space between you and him

taps his cheek to tell you he wants kisses

when you go on dates, will literally make you stand on your tippy toes to get his kisses

does not bend down at all and actually lifts his head higher to tease you

in other words, clingy but rude hoe

george -

george is a classic romantic

he loves just lip kisses

pecks or lingering ones

he doesn’t care

mans don’t need too many kisses

nor does he need to be too clingy

total opposite of dream and sapnap *ahem clingy ahem*

if he wants a kiss,

he will come over to you and get it

doesn’t get pouty if you’re busy

just waits patiently

doesn’t enjoy it when you interrupt him when he’s streaming so you do your own thing

when you’re watching a movie with him,

he will literally only stare at you with his cute smile

and listen to your every criticism of the movie

he likes to just peck your lips whenever he feels like it

and you’re just not surprised anymore

just likes to stare at your lips whenever you talk

overall, is very sweet but not to an extent with showing affection

sapnap -

omg

sapnap just vibes with neck kisses

it tickles his neck and he loves them

giggles when you pepper kisses along his neck and flushes a deep red

“y/n. stop.” giggles between each word

but when you do, becomes the saddest person in the whole world

“i was joking.” :(

when he’s streaming and he begins to miss you

would leave his room and find you just to get a kiss

just like dream, would get angry if you give him no kisses

“GIVE ME KISSIES!”

very amusing for you

and you love to tease him

“i don’t want to give you kissies.”

continues to stare at you with a large frown until you give in and give him kissies

lsg supremacy but i’ll get into this later hehe

you better give him kisses or you’ll be dealing with a very sad sapnap

sadnap :(

wilbur -

wilbur, wilbur, wilbur

what can i even say

total nose kiss guy

i bet he’ll boop your nose twenty four seven

asks stupid questions just to get your attention

“y/n?”

“yes wilbur?”

“is a hotdog a sandwich?”

“why-“

“boop.”

“did you just say boop while you booped my nose?”

if he’s streaming and you bring him a snack

he will hold your face still and leave kisses on your nose

not too clingy but not too distant

likes to be just right with you

if its snowy outside and your noses get red

makes dumb jokes about he is rudolph and you’re mrs. rudolph

just a lot of smooches from wilby

takes you to a lot of hidden cafes in the city

and while you read, he balances his head on his palm, staring at you in admiration

if you’re insecure about your nose, you legit can’t be around wilbur because he will go on a tangent about how beautiful it is

substantially, soft boy hours all day bro, besides when he gets mad then you leave the hormonal man tf alone

punz -

i don’t see a lot of punz on tumblr so here we go

punz loves hand kisses

not to an extent where he has a hand fetish

god no but just like

when your holding hands, he’ll occasionally pull your hand up to his lips and leave a kiss

lots of hand holding

and i mean lots

constantly gets mad fun of for being a simp but ignores those comments because he genuinely loves you so much

likes it when you play with his hair and messing it up

also likes to compare hand sizes with you

always has a hand on your thigh or your hand in his whenever he is driving somewhere with you

even when you go on dates, always holding hands

no matter how sweaty your hand gets, he will hold on

sometimes if he holds on for too long, you have to tell him to let go

“punz, my hand is super sweaty. lets take a break from the hand holding.”

would flat out decline so you would have to pry your hand out of his

he would also love it when you would kiss his hand

makes him feel all polite and precious LOL

would also wrap his pinky along yours when you walk together

he once came with you to a family gathering for christmas and was so SHY

shy boy held your hand for security while your younger siblings made fun of you

afterwards, when you were under a mistletoe, he kisses you on the lips before kissing you on his favorite part of your body,

your hand

c!jschlatt -

jschlatt is a whole mess

the first time you met, he confessed that he would hate you for as long as you lived because you made fun of his boots

now he says he still strongly dislikes you but you’re more tolerable

doesn’t like it when you make him soft and HATES it when he blushes

“why must you do this to me, mother nature?”

also “hates” it when you even touch him because he “hates” you

when he actually confessed to you that he liked you with his grumpy usual grandpa voice,

you kissed him on his forehead, after he bent down of course

he is an actual giant and threatens to squash you like an ant if he feels the need to

is an absolute monster to you but loves it when you kiss his forehead because it makes him feel secure and loved

likes to watch the wind blow through your hair and mess it up but gives you his hat because he like you being “all pretty and shit”

gets SUPER jealous when you hug children

like for example, when you went over to a family gathering at his house, his cousins came up to hug you

and when you let go of the child, the man child comes and lugs you over his shoulder

gets yelled at by his mom and gives her a sheepish smile before rolling his eyes and throwing you down on the sofa set next to him

his mom doesn’t approve of the way he treats you but you tell her its fine because he’s cute

when you are far from any type of civilization or in the safety and solitude of your own home, he wants kisses on the forehead

pointing up to it and bending down so you could reach it

“y/n, i only love you because of your forehead kisses.”

“you only love me for my kisses?” :(

“mhm.”

actually feels slightly bad

“and because of your personality.”

“thank you-“

“shut up. we don’t talk about this.”

in conclusion, give him his forehead kisses or perish

awesamdude -

sam just adores it when you give him jawline kisses

not because it’s basically the only place you could reach but because it’s a sweet gesture

sam is all about sweetness

i mean have you even seen this man on his stream

he likes to watch you while you have conversations with your friends

not in a creepy way but more like an adoring way

cause man does he love you

i mean not only does he love you but his whole family does

and when you’re alone with sam, you love to bury him underneath all of your love

“i love you sam!”

“no i love you more y/n!”

“NO i LOVE you more!”

“NO i LOVE you MORE!”

“SAM NO. I LOVE YOU MORE!”

“okay thank you sweet pea.”

leaving you a bit confused but happy that he accepts your love

when you cuddle, omg

he never stops peppering kisses all over your face and vice versa because your relationship is disgustingly fluffy

when he lends you one of his sweatshirts, you sure as hell better wear that shit out or else (i am leaving a blank threat here)

sam loves technology but you guys sort of have a system

a system that involves mailing each other love letters rather than texting them

you guys also go on a ton of walks just about anywhere

hand holding is mandatory even though you probably look like a child compared to him

just give sam lots of love and in return, you’ll receive lots of love

quackity -

mans cannot leave you tf alone

likes to do ANYTHING freaky around you

“i will follow you to the ends of the earth, mi amor.” or

“ayy, back off.” if anyone gets too close to you

messes with you twenty four seven and makes it his job to drive you insane

plays horror games at two in the morning for fun

and when he gets scared, hides in the safety of your arms

“mi amor. i’m scared.”

“shut the fuck up and sleep, alex.”

“okay.” shuts up quickly and snuggles deeper into the crook of your neck

loves you so deeply but HATES your cat

“look at that little dumb thing stare at me. you got a problem bro?”

your cat also HATES alex

scratches him all the time and hisses at him

if you think sapnap is babie, wait till you meet alex

“y/n he bit me!”

when you glance down, you don’t even see a scratch

“kiss my boo boo.”

wtf

“what boo boo? there’s nothing there.”

gasps as if you offended him

“this boo boo that your el demonio did to me.”

this man will do anything to get boo boo kisses

istg, you once found him provoking your cat to get some scratches

in alex’s mind, ouchies = kisses from y/n

always has ouchies from god knows where and shows it to you

even though you find it annoying at first, you grow used to it and it sorta becomes your thing with alex

alex is babie and you need to take good care of him :)

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rended-symphony · 3 years

Note

I LOVE UR HEADCANONS 💯‼️ nyways since requests are open can i maybe rq feral boys and how they would deal with a long distance relationship ? mine ended badly sooo i will be coping with this lmao 👍

honey 🥺 i’m sorry yours ended badly, i’m sure you’ll be better in no time !! (assuming “rq” means c! lol still gotta edit the “characters i’ll rite thingy but it’s fine sigwsjuswond but we all know i’m gonna make a second part with cc!’s 😐 love em to much bestie)

warnings : swearing

~ c!dream ~

- of course it’s long distance he’s in a prison wihwksys

- his smart little head made a system where he could send you letters after sam stopped letting you visit (you visited him like everyday he suspected SOMETHING)

- he always seems so overwhelmingly sweet in the letters. just

- “and my love, each and every moment without you i feel like i’m burning from my core”

- meanwhile technos hovering over his shoulder like “bestie wtf”

- if he ever escapes he immediately runs out and tries to find you. most people hear that and assume he’s gonna try to… ya know… game end you

- and them seeing you as an innocent, try to protect you meanwhile you shove past them to go kiss your villainess boyfriend

- he is very passionate about most things, mostly you though

~ c!george ~

- he just naps on kinoko kingdom all the time and you live in the old l’manberg area, literallyright next to the l’manhole (cough cough enemies to lovers, you fought for l’manberg and he fell for you while guarding the walls)

- whenever he’s up he makes sure to write to you, before going off to mess with sapnap and karl (and quackity when they eventually make up and he visits them all the time 😌👌)

- sometimes he travels to the main smp to visit you and those day are so relaxing

- just sitting on a hill, wtaching over the smp peacefully. knowing that now, finally, all the war is over

- dream xd got jealous at first but then he started spending time alone with you and adores you

- if george can’t bother with a letter he’ll just tell XD to tell you something for him since he can just teleport

- listen the postal service is absolutely shit and we all know it. like literally still trying to send letters between lovers that are shocked that celebrity tommy wifehaver innit died

- “hey can you go ask y/n if i can have that cake recipe? oh also add in a quick love you, please” “sure pretty boy”

- “y/n!!” “oh hey XD! what’s up?” “george says, “can i have that cake recipe? also add in a quick love you please!” and you pat his head and tell him the recipe <33

- he bakes as a pastime and nikki helps him out, their countries are very good allies and you and nikki hang out whenever your over there

~ c!sapnap ~

- he cannot take staying away from you all the time, cc!sapnap literally made facetime canon JUST so his oc could talk to his lovers oc and it make slight sense

- the general situation with karl and quackity is that their all dating but your dating sapnap, but none of the others, though you are pretty good friends

- he used to live with you before moving to kinoko with karl and george, and you still have half his stuff at your place because he’s their half the time

- all the workers at the train are friends with him, so used to him going back and forth

- puffy will be out on a walk in peaceful times and always go “oh, other half of the happy couples back? good for you, sweet cheeks.”

- the whole smp likes to just watch you go on the longest walks. legit walked all the way to the arctic after being away from each other for a while.

~ c!quackity ~

- he honestly low key prefers it

- he doenst want you to get all messed up with casino life, he does really miss you sometimes. definitely visits you and everyone else in kinoko though

- even in peaceful times Las Nevadas is a reck, they only times there aren’t any major fights is…

- when your around. honestly the citizens just have such high respect for you they wouldn’t dare

- doenst really bother with letters but rather he just. texts you through chat. it’s easier and he gets his responses quick okay-

- but, oh whenever he visits kinoko

- days are filled with sunshine and jumping from mushroom to mushroom shouting “parkour!!”, karl and sapnap following a small distance behind, all the citizens hearing distant giggles filling the whole country

- “michelle” is his favorite song to slow dance to and he has no clue why. he just loves the look on your face when he dips you at the second “you are a monster from hell”

- love slow dancing. cant say more, he just loves to kiss you while dipping you as far as he can without dropping you

- which he definitely has done

~ c!karl ~

- cannot stand being away so much, sends like two letters a day and donates a fuck ton of money so that they can actually get to you quickly

- he loves just knowing that you giggled so he does random stuff in the letters to make you giggle.

- from just making stupid little dick doodles to literally sending it in a monster can as if he was lost at sea, he’ll go all out

- sometime he’ll hear a random noise and think it’s you doing your funky little surprise visits, but turns out it’s just a sheep that got it’s way into the house :(

- devotes lots little things to you. just a ton of rocks around the country written “karl + y/n <3”, torn up pieces of song lyrics karl wrote about you, toasts drinks to you. the kids literally make a scavenger hunt on items that like those that they found and placed around the country

- okay hear me out here- hear me out- he refers to the sun as your name. BECAUSE YOUR THE LIGHT OF HIS LI-

- ever heard “sugar rush” by addison grace? anthem

#; cherry writes #mcyt x reader #dsmp x reader #dream smp x reader #dream x reader #dreamwastaken x reader #karl jacobs x reader #georgenotfound x reader #karl x reader #sapnap x reader #feral boys x reader

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fvrxdrm · 3 years

Text

Last Night (Leon Kennedy x Reader)

Pairing: Infinite Darkness!Leon x GN!Reader

Warning(s): Implied sex

This is about a dream I had a few nights ago. I added a few things at the end bc the ending in my dream didn’t make sense but I’ll explain it later at the end notes.

*****

“Ugh! She’s a fucking headache!”

The coolness of the air conditioning in the briefing room dried up the remaining sweat on your back and forehead and your hands went disgustingly sticky with the clamminess clinging into your palm. Fatigued and dozy you were, you were sure you were going to pass out right there in your seat.

You, along with your partner, Leon, were tasked to save Ashley Graham again, this time in a more urban part of Italy. When the president told you about her getting kidnapped again, you legit rolled your eyes and Leon nudged your side when he saw the subtle gesture you displayed. Had Leon had the audacity to disrespect people who had higher power than him in his line of work, he would’ve flipped the president off and took the both of you to a nearby bar. He wasn’t like that though, much to your dismay. He still had that “mama’s boy” attitude in him even when he left some of it during his “rookie day” or night or something.

You were close to rioting that time. They were going to send you to that fucking mission again with only the two of you and hand you both shitty-ass pistols with ten fucking bullets. Who the fuck does that? Wouldn’t you send the whole team if you, the president of the United fucking States, had a daughter that’s been kidnapped? Also, why the fuck didn’t they enhance the fucking security level? Hello? Parenting 101?

Leon crashed onto the couch beside you, making you bounce a bit, before shaking his hair from the grease and dampness his locks held. “Agreed. I might’ve lost my ears right there…again,” he grunted as he stretched his arms above his head and managed to pop a few joints in the process. “Wanna grab a few drinks after this?”

With your head leaned against the back of the couch, you turned to look at your friend with jaded eyes and a lazy smile. You nodded in response and slapped a hand on his thigh. “Sure.”

*****

You may or may not have had one too many drinks and danced around like a fucking worm on crack. Leon had one of his arms wrapped around your waist and a glass of whiskey in his free hand as he ground against your skirt-clad ass while you responded back with the same enthusiasm as him. Both of you were drunk, that’s for sure. Not only with pure intoxication, but also with a sinful desire; something you two unknowingly shared on nights where fingers worked their magic to bring you both to a blissful high. You knew they weren’t enough to satisfy your wants, but they were enough to calm your racing thoughts temporarily instead of committing to a one-time thing and bringing awkwardness in the atmosphere, at least you thought it would’ve been a one-time thing.

Leon whispered naughty things into your ear, things he wouldn’t have said had he been conscious enough to stop himself from making a move, and boldly dipped a finger in your skirt and rubbed your pussy through your underwear. He was going to make love to you, he said, and he would make sure that you would be his. You bit your lip as you moaned at his words. He was hot and you would gladly let him fuck you anytime, anywhere. And so, you agreed.

*****

Ring. Ring. Ring.

The provoking sound of your phone pulled you away from your dream. Your fantasy was so close to getting to the good part. Leon was about to fucking kiss you and then somebody decided to fucking wake you up! You sighed. If somebody woke you up this early then you guessed it was really important. So, despite being piqued and groggy from the sudden sound, you picked your phone up from the night stand beside your bed, not even thinking about how different your room looked, and checked the time before answering the call. “Hello?” You spoke, your voice raspy and your throat feeling like a thousand knives were stabbed into it. You also took note of how your head felt like you were banging it against the wall with so much speed and vigor and attempted to ease it down with a simple massage but to no avail.

“Morning, Y/N!”, the voice from the other line boomed, causing your agonizing condition to aggravate even more.

Ashley

You groaned at the contrasting enthusiasm the girl had and you had to slam the phone on the mattress to ground yourself and keep you from dying. “Can you keep your voice down? I have a headache right now and it would be much appreciated if you could calm down,” you said after bringing your device back to your ear.

“Oh, sorry. I was just going to ask if you could meet me in the church later? I wanted to talk to you about something while we get everything set for my wedding tomorrow. I tried calling Leon, but he wouldn’t answer. Can you do me a favor of telling him about it too?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll call him.”

“Thanks, Y/N! I’ll see you later,” she said. The call ended with a series of beeps and you slammed your phone on the bed again with your eyes shut tight in irritation.

I cannot deal with that girl again. Especially now that I’m hungover… But who am I to deny the president’s fucking daughter…?

You sighed.

Welp, time to call Leon.

You raised your phone up parallel to your face and was about to press Leon’s saved contact name when you suddenly felt an arm wrap around your torso. Your heart pounded. With eyes opened wide and brain waking up from its slumber in an instant, you slowly turned your head towards your left and almost screamed at what you saw…or rather who you saw.

Leon.

His chest was exposed to the warmth of the morning air, hair strands clamped together by oil and sweat that was starting to form on his skin. He was still deep in his slumber and you noticed how the round bulge tucked in his eyelids moved around as if he was exploring something in his dream.

Never had you and Leon shared a bed together. Those times where he would come over to your place for a drink? He would always insist that he could just crash into your couch in order to avoid invading your privacy.

You panicked at the situation you were in. You grabbed the hem of your blanket and yanked it up to check if anything did happen, and surprise, surprise; something did. You were both naked and you felt something drying up down there. You also started taking notice of how your vagina felt sore from probably getting pounded and fucked silly last night-

Oh, right! Last night.

You vaguely remembered how Leon touched your body while you two were getting drunk. You two were getting a bit too flirty and began groping each other here and there, getting more and more suggestive as minutes passed, pie-eyed and unconscious with how you were treating each other as more than friends.

Every corner and every wall your eyes passed was becoming a void of something dark, something you became anxious of. What happened would forever change your friendship and your relationship with him for sure. Hell, you weren’t even sure if he was going to stay by your side starting from when he wakes up in a few minutes. And as much as you wanted to go back and prevent that from happening, you couldn’t, and you had to face the music whether you liked or not.

*****

Sure enough, when you woke Leon up, everything was awkward. No words were exchange from when you prepared for the day, breakfast, and until Leon drove you both to the location Ashley had told you to go to. The silence rose hysteria in both of your minds. You were going fucking crazy. You were fidgety when you sat beside Leon in the passenger seat and the man would bounce his leg up and down when you hit a red light. You both were trying to avoid taking a glance at each other, but those inevitable moments that you did, you would forcefully smile at each other and then gaze back out the window again. That was the cycle you lived on for a few hours and you decided to let it stay like that until one of you broke the atmosphere.

You waited inside the church as you were told. It was only the two of you inside but you acted like a handful of people were sitting beside you with the amount of space that was left unfilled between you. You were biting your lip and focusing on the pillars and stones that made up the building until you couldn’t process anything that was happening anymore and stood up, studying the interior as you roamed. “Hey,” you heard somebody whisper behind you. You looked down to your wrist when you felt something warm and saw a fairly large hand loosely gripping onto it before looking up to see Leon’s eyes gazing into yours. You nearly got lost in them but thankfully, he spoke before you got stuck into your own stupor. “I just wanna say… I’m sorry. I-it’s not gonna change everything that happened but I don’t want to break what we have. I value you and our friendship too much for me to let it go. I don’t think we can forget about last night but if it makes you feel better…I-I-“

“Can we talk about this outside? I don’t think it’s appropriate for us to talk about it here,” you chuckled. Leon nodded in agreement before leading you out to where a garden caught your attention. “Listen Leon, I know we can’t just pretend nothing happened but… I don’t wanna let go of this either. I value this as much as you do and it would be crazy stupid for me just to just hate you for something we weren’t even conscious about or something,” you said. You both laughed in relief as the weight on your shoulders dissipated into thin air before you placed a gentle palm on his cheek. Again, no words were shared but this time, no anxiety was present. Instead, you felt like this was an intimate moment only the two of you shared. Something was being written in the stars and you saw every word the gods wrote in the eyes of the person in front of you both.

As cheesy as it sounded, you two felt like magnets were pulling you towards each other, physically and mentally, and in a matter of seconds, you found your lips being pressed against Leon’s.

It was like you were recreating what happened last night without even knowing the details, except this was slower, more sensual, and certainly more emotional, and you couldn’t help the tears that flowed freely against your cheeks.

“Come on, let’s ditch Ashley. Maybe we could relive what happened last night?”

*****

Okay, so in my dream, Ashley’s not getting married and she didn’t call me. Instead, what happened was after the bar scene, Leon and I got teleported in front of the altar and just fucking talked. And then we walked outside and what happened in the end of this fic happened in my dream. Lol.

I rushed this bc I’m tired.

#leonkennedy #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy imagines #leon s kennedy x reader #leonxreader #leon kennedy x you #leon+kennedy+fanfic #leon+kennedy+imagine #resident evil #resident evil x reader #resident evil fanfic

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refinedbuffoonery · 3 years

Text

Looking Through A Window (2)

macriley married undercover au

masterlist.

Oh man. My dudes. I received so much love and support and excited feedback on the first chapter that I thought my heart was going to explode. Y’all are so wonderful. Keep it up. <3

*****

Luckily, Matty lets them take the Phoenix jet to Houston. Flying commercial would make today even more tortuous than it already promises to be, albeit for a different reason.

No matter how hard he tries to distract himself, Mac cannot stop staring at the diamond ring on Riley’s finger. The princess cut gem is stunning and ridiculously large, but it suits her cover as a lucrative arms dealer. A white gold wedding band sits below it. Riley left her usual assortment of rings at home, and Mac can’t help but think her long, delicate fingers look bare without them.

He tears his eyes away from the rings again and again, both on the plane and while driving to the safe house. Riley drives with just her left hand, her right elbow resting on the center console. Mac likes driving, but there’s something relaxing about riding shotgun while Riley drives instead. He’s never been able to put a finger on it, but the sense of ease washes over him all the same. Admiring the way sunlight illuminates her engagement ring is simply a bonus.

He doesn’t let himself imagine what he might give her, in an alternate future where she reciprocates his feelings and one day wants to marry him.

Harley obediently lays in the backseat, staring out the windshield. She's been on her best behavior the entire twenty four hours Mac's known her, ever the professional.

Which puts her completely at odds with Mac and Riley's shenanigans—cracking jokes, dancing on the plane and in the car, doing purposefully bad impersonations of Russ. These are the best parts of going on ops alone with Riley. They can let loose in a way they just couldn’t when anyone else other than Bozer was around. Everyone else is professional all the time; Mac and Riley are only professional when they have to be.

Riley taps the steering wheel in time to the classic rock song on the radio. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Dinner? We haven’t even had lunch yet!”

“True.” Riley chuckles. “Can you tell I’m hungry?”

Mac gives her a sly look. “Not at all.”

They settle on Texas barbecue for lunch on their way to the safe house, because that’s what Jack would choose if he was here. If only the old man could see them now, all grown up and getting sent to take down terrorists unsupervised.

Seated in a booth in the far corner of the restaurant, Mac raises his brisket sandwich in a toast to Jack, in whatever afterlife he found himself in. Hopefully it’s the one with an endless supply of good barbecue.

“Oh man, Jack would’ve loved this,” Riley says through a mouthful of food. She sneaks Harley a piece of brisket.

Mac smiles. “Yeah, he would’ve.”

It’s easier, now, to talk about him. At first, Mac hadn’t been sure he could ever get to a point where talking about Jack didn’t make him want to hit something or just curl up and sob.

But here he is, on the other side. Him and Riley both.

Their safe house is another twenty minutes away from the restaurant, in a nice neighborhood full of trees and children playing on the sidewalks. It’s so much greener than a California neighborhood could ever dream of being. There’s even a park across the street from their apartment complex. It’s exactly the sort of place a young, affluent couple would want to live.

Riley parks in their designated space, and the pair ascend the stairs to apartment number 202. Outside of the car, they don’t dare use each other’s real names until they’re sure the apartment is free of bugs. The place was furnished earlier that week by other Phoenix agents, but Mac and Riley do a thorough sweep of every room just in case.

It’s a nice apartment. Wood flooring, granite countertops, matching cabinets throughout. There are pictures on the walls, but Mac doesn’t bother to stop and check what they are.

Riley clears the space from back to front, so Mac does the opposite. He clears the kitchen first, frowning at the absence of any sort of food, before moving on to the living room.

Mac stops dead in his tracks when he enters the bedroom. The singular bedroom. With a singular, queen-sized bed.

Oh no. This is not happening.

Mac shakes his head and rubs his eyes, hoping his mind is just playing tricks on him and that there’s actually two beds. Or a whole other room he missed before.

The one and only bed seems to mock him.

He walks back out, finding Riley already sitting at the kitchen table, turning on her laptop. “Uhh, Riles? There’s only—”

“One bed,” she finishes, not bothering to look up. “I know.”

Oh god. He can’t do this. He can’t. Not with his dignity still intact. Mac stammers, “I’ll, uhh, sleep on the couch. You can have it.”

That gets Riley’s attention. “Don’t be ridiculous. We’re going to be here for weeks. You’ll hurt your back sleeping on the couch that long. Just sleep with me.” Riley’s eyes widen as she realizes what she just said. “In the bed,” she quickly adds.

Mac ducks his head to hide his blush.

“What are you working on?” he asks in a feeble attempt to distract himself from their sleeping situation. Because it will definitely be a situation if Mac’s not careful.

“Connecting to the Wi-Fi,” Riley says in a slow, “What else would I be doing?” sort of way.

“Right.” Mac silently curses himself. Of course that’s what she’s doing. “Anyway, I’m assuming you already know this, since you probably opened the fridge too, but we have no food.”

“I saw.” She’s multitasking again, manicured fingers flying faster across her keyboard than Mac can keep track of. “Why don’t you unload our bags while I finish this, and then we can go.”

Unable to help feeling like he’s been dismissed, Mac complies without protest.

Soon they’re back in the car, headed to the grocery store, and the whole thing feels ridiculously domestic. Mac’s never been a fan of grocery shopping, but Riley makes it almost...fun. For starters, she’s not methodical about it the way Bozer and Desi are. But more than that, getting to spend time with her doing mundane, non-work stuff is a nice reminder that their relationship is more than just the job. They’re friends too.

Mac wishes there is a way to tell her all that without it sounding weird.

They come home, unload the groceries, and take Harley for a long walk, and that feels easy too. It feels normal, even though literally nothing about this situation is normal, and Mac already knows he’ll miss this when the op is over.

But normalcy ends when Riley beckons Mac to sit beside her at the kitchen table, and together they write an advertisement for their arms dealing business. Once they’re satisfied with it, Riley sends it off into the dark web, and there’s nothing to do but wait, like a spider after spinning her web.

The waiting is the worst part.

Mac is contemplating taking Harley for a second walk when Riley asks, “Want to help me make dinner?” He takes one look at her hands on her hips and the “you don’t actually have a choice” look on her face and knows he’ll be left to fend for himself if he doesn’t help now. Mac learned that the hard way back when he and Riley lived together.

“Sure.”

They work in comfortable silence. Mac chops vegetables and grates cheese for their quesadillas while Riley does the actual cooking part. Even though they are doing separate tasks, Mac is acutely aware of every move Riley makes, no matter how insignificant. Flexing her long, thin fingers around a knife. Itching the back of her calf with her foot. Dancing in place, spatula in hand, while she waits to flip the quesadillas sizzling in the pan.

Mac smiles softly. Her random little dances are cute. He’s noticed them more and more since realizing he has feelings for her, but if Mac is being honest, he’s always thought the dances are cute.

Riley hisses as she peeks under the tortilla, checking to see if it’s browned yet.

“You good?” Mac asks, frowning.

“Yeah, I touched the pan by accident.” Riley runs her thumb under cold water.

Her laptop dings while they eat. Wide-eyed, Mac glances at Riley. That was fast. She grimaces before sliding the laptop closer and checking the notification.

“Is it them?” he asks tentatively. That’s the hard part about this; in order for their business to look more legit, they had to just put an ad out and hope for a response, rather than target the terrorist organization directly.

Riley exhales. “No, it’s not them. It’s someone else.”

Swallowing another bite of quesadilla, Mac says, “I don’t know whether I’m relieved or if that’s worse.”

“Same.”

There are no more responses that night.

*****

Mac wakes up in the same position he fell asleep in—on his side, facing outward, with as much space between him and Riley as possible. When they crawled into bed the night before, Riley did the same.

Harley spent the night on the couch.

She’s a very guarded dog, Mac is slowly realizing. Tolerating, but not trusting. Mac supposes he would be like that too if he was a dog and he got stuck with a bunch of strangers after his human suddenly disappeared one day.

He makes coffee, feeds Harley breakfast, and takes a shower, all before Riley loses her battle with the snooze button and finally gets out of bed. While she showers, Mac takes Harley for a walk in hopes that the cool, spring air will ease the anxiety that took root the moment Riley released their ad into the void.

It doesn’t.

Dark, puffy clouds loom on the horizon, and the few birds Mac hears shriek at each other in warning. It looks like a storm is coming.

When Mac returns, he’s met with a grim expression, one he understands without Riley uttering a single word. “They answered,” she confirms.

“What did they say?” Unclipping Harley’s leash, Mac moves to stand behind Riley, resting his hands on the back of her chair. The scent of her shampoo tickles his nose, and he forces himself to ignore it and focus on what Riley’s saying.

“They want to meet. Today.”

“Time or place?”

Riley points at a small box on her screen. “Just an address.”

“What’s there?”

“A warehouse,” Riley says. “Owned by the same shell corporation other Phoenix techs already tied to the organization.”

“Not very clandestine, are they?”

“No, they’re not.” Riley looks up at him, her head bumping his sternum, and butterflies ricochet inside Mac’s rib cage. There’s something soft in Riley’s expression that makes Mac want to kiss her. “Are you ready for this?”

Mac sighs. “As ready as I ever am. Are you?”

“Yeah,” she says, but her confidence falters. Without thinking, Mac squeezes her shoulders in reassurance before walking away to change.

*****

The warehouse is located on the edge of the city, in an industrial area that has certainly seen better days. Even from a distance, Mac can see cobwebs decorating the warehouse windows and rust creeping up the roller doors. Aside from Riley, there’s not another soul in sight.

As per the directions the organization sent after Riley confirmed the meeting, Mac parks on the south side of the building, near the only functional-looking door. He doesn’t look at Riley as they get out of the car, instead desperately trying not to cringe at the cold, heavy weight of the gun holstered at his side, hidden beneath his jacket.

High-end arms dealers couldn’t walk around unarmed, unfortunately.

Although her hands are occupied with holding Harley’s leash, there’s a gun hidden beneath Riley’s suit jacket as well. Mac’s stomach churns. The second Riley emerged from their bedroom earlier wearing that jet black suit, she was a different person. She was wholly Genevieve Turner, and no matter how hard Mac tried, he couldn’t find even a single trace of his best friend beneath the icy exterior.

Locking their SUV, Mac smooths the lapels of his own black suit and slips into character as well.

The dark clouds Mac noticed earlier are directly overhead now. Mac has never believed in omens the way Jack did, but he can’t help hearing Jack’s voice in his head, warning him that black clouds are a sign of certain doom. Or something like that.

There’s no one inside the warehouse, at least as far as Mac can see. “Hello?” he calls, the word echoing slightly in the open space. Aside from a few random wooden crates, the room is empty.

A door slams, and then an older man comes into view. He’s probably in his late fifties, with graying hair and a beer belly his shirt doesn’t quite cover. The man swaggers like he owns the place, although Mac doubts the leader of a terrorist cell would deign to play tour guide.

No doubt there’s a quip on the edge of Riley’s tongue about entitled white men, but she doesn’t share it.

The man extends a hand to Mac in introduction. “Conrad.” His sneer doesn’t reach his eyes.

Mac frowns, keeping his hands at his sides. “Last name?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

What he’s about to say might screw everything up before it even starts, but Mac says it anyway. In his gut, he knows it’s the right call. “If it doesn’t matter, then we’re done here. My wife and I have no interest in entering a business relationship with someone too inexperienced to understand that trust is integral to any transaction.” Mac spins on his heel and strides toward the door, Riley falling into step beside him.

“Wait!” the man calls. They pause, turning around slowly. “Deacon. Conrad Deacon.” The man seems to know he’s already lost. Good. “Welcome to the cause.” He gestures for Mac and Riley to follow him.

Mac stands his ground. In his peripheral, Riley stands utterly still, the perfect mask of cool, collected neutrality. Almost bored, even. It’s scary how easily she becomes her cover.

“Come on now,” Conrad says, taking a single step forward. “We have much to discuss.”

That’s enough of the power play, Mac thinks, but just as he’s about to give in and follow Conrad, Riley utters a single, sharp command that rings through the room. “Sit.”

Harley obeys.

Riley’s lips curve in a cruel, taunting smile. “Then enlighten us.” Mac suppresses a shiver; he’s seen this side of Riley plenty of times before, watched her hone it over the years, but it’s still unnerving. Admittedly, it’s also kind of hot.

Conrad ignores her entirely. He croons, “Why don’t we start with your names?” It’s phrased like a question. It sounds like a question, but Mac sees the demand for what it really is.

Mac gestures to Riley. “This is my wife, Genevieve Turner. And my name is James.” His father’s name tastes like ash on Mac’s tongue.

“And the dog?”

“Killer,” Riley sneers. Mac isn’t sure if she’s kidding or not.

Again, Conrad doesn’t acknowledge her. “James, why don’t I give you the tour and explain what we do here.”

“We’ll go on the tour, but we are not here to join your cause.” It takes every ounce of Mac’s willpower to maintain his neutral tone. “All we care about is what you’d like us to provide and how much you’ll pay for it.”

Conrad doesn’t hide his displeasure. “Fine. Follow me.”

Mac and Riley are led through the open warehouse. The layout is straightforward and nearly impossible to get lost in. But after Conrad shows them a room full of rifles—countless hung on the walls, floor to ceiling, the rest in half-open crates—Mac finds himself counting the number of wooden shipping crates scattered around the building.

He doesn’t like his final number.

Arming terrorists doesn’t sit well with Mac, even if it serves a purpose. It makes him sick, knowing he will likely be indirectly responsible for their next attack.

Especially because those crates are no doubt full of the kind of rifles designed to kill people most effectively. The ones hanging on the wall are military grade, probably cutting-edge. Desi would know exactly what they are and how they work.

Trusting Riley is paying close attention, Mac only half listens to Conrad babble about the cause. But then the older man says something that stops Mac in his tracks. “Our country is being run into the ground by whiny do-nothings,” Conrad asserts, “who waste our money and spew garbage that some people matter more than others. Well, you know what? Hardworking, everyday Americans matter. But no,” he scoffs, “those damn liberals don’t like it when we remind them of the truth. Once we’re rid of them and the insufferables who elected them, this country will be better off.”

The ground sways under Mac’s feet. He knows these people believe this, read it in Matty’s extensive briefing notes. But it’s another thing entirely to hear someone say it to his face.

He can only imagine what Riley must be thinking.

Clearing his throat, Mac tries to redirect the conversation. “Like I said, we don’t care about your cause. Just tell us what you’re looking for, and we’ll be on our way.”

Conrad eyes him suspiciously, but complies. “We’re looking for something a little more than what you can get at the store, you know?”

Mac doesn’t, not exactly. He’ll have to ask Desi later. “I do,” he lies.

“Good. Here’s what we’re willing to pay for it.” He hands Mac a folded piece of paper, and Mac does a double take when he reads the number. There are a lot of zeroes. “And as a show of good faith, we’d like it delivered tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” Riley splutters. Mac feels it then, the broiling rage slipping through a crack in her persona. He needs to get her out of there. Now. Not just to preserve the op, but for Riley’s wellbeing. Some audacity Matty has making Riley play nice with men like this.

Mac slides his hands into his pockets, using the movement as a cover to brush his knuckles against Riley’s fist. I know. I’m here. I’m sorry.

For the first time, Conrad addresses Riley directly. “Yes. Tomorrow. Unless that’s something you can’t do?”

“We can do that,” she replies calmly, and the difference between her reactions is like night and day. As quickly as that crack appeared, it was gone.

“Excellent.” Conrad takes another step toward Riley, offering to shake hands, but Harley’s low, menacing growl keeps him at bay. Rewarding the dog with a quick scratch on the head, Riley closes the gap and shakes Conrad’s still-outstretched hand.

“It’s a deal,” she says. Following suit, Mac shakes Conrad’s hand as well and follows Riley out the door, neither of them uttering another word.

Mac drives. One look at Riley’s trembling fist decides for him.

By the time the warehouse disappears from the rearview mirror, he can’t take the silence anymore. “Hey,” Mac starts, but Riley cuts him off with a hand.

“Not until we’re inside.”

They hit every single red light between the warehouse and the apartment, and Mac anxiously taps the steering wheel. Raindrops land on the windshield. They’re small at first, but soon the drops are large and numerous enough to refract the streetlights, and Mac struggles to see where he’s going. He adjusts the windshield wipers over and over, never landing on the right speed.

Too slow. Too fast. Too slow. Too fast.

Mac settles on a setting that’s slightly too fast, and the squeak of rubber on glass nearly matches his heart thudding in his chest.

Riley stares straight ahead, unmoving, unblinking. Mac wants to reach out, to let a gentle touch say what he verbally can’t, but the road is slick enough to make him keep two hands on the wheel. We’re almost there, he reassures himself.

By the time he parks, it’s pouring hard enough that the ten second walk from the car to the door soaks them to the bone. Riley’s hands shake as she unlocks the apartment door.

Once they’re inside and Mac unclips Harley’s leash, Riley turns to him with pained, pleading eyes. His heart breaking all over again, Mac draws her in for a long, tight hug. She doesn’t say anything. She doesn’t have to.

Mac just cradles the back of her head and sways gently, wishing he could fix the world for her.

Neither pulls away, even when Riley suddenly says, “If Conrad was smart, he would’ve had someone bug our car while he paraded us around the warehouse. I don’t think he’s actually smart enough to do that, but we should check first, just in case.”

Mac curses himself for not thinking of that. “Good call.” He rubs Riley’s back, hoping the gesture is soothing. “I hate the way he treated you,” he snarls. “Like you weren’t even worth acknowledging.”

“Welcome to being a woman.”

It was more than that. They both know it. But neither say it.

*****

“You need what?” Matty shrieks over the phone.

Mac winces. “Sorry.” He’d called Desi first, to ask what kind of guns Conrad meant with his innuendo, and received a verbal lashing for not asking any follow-up questions. But she made her best guess anyway. Now on the phone with Matty, it doesn’t take even a single brain cell to know that her reaction will be much, much worse.

“He wants us to prove ourselves,” Riley adds. “As a show of good faith.” The words come out dripping in venom, but their boss doesn’t comment. Mac takes a second to study her; Riley changed into leggings and an oversized flannel shirt, and there are still remnants of dark makeup smudges under her eyes. Now, she’s sitting on the kitchen counter with her knees tucked into her chest. It’s weird to see her take up so little space.

Matty sighs, deeply and loudly in a way conveys her annoyance more than words ever could. “Fine. A few weeks ago, Border Control confiscated a huge shipment of smuggled guns near El Paso, so I’ll see if we can borrow those. But next time, Blondie, don’t make promises you can’t keep.” He doesn’t correct Matty in that it was Riley who made the deal. That would only add fuel to the fire.

“Thank you,” he says, and Matty hangs up. Mac runs a hand through his damp hair. “That went well.” Riley’s lips twitch, but it’s not the amused reaction he hopes for. He’s at a complete loss regarding what to say to her, so Mac gently asks, “What can I do?”

Riley slides off the counter, and Mac reaches for her automatically, although he doesn’t actually touch her; his hand hovers just beside Riley’s elbow. She doesn’t shrink away, but she makes no move to touch him either.

“Help me put him and everyone like him in a deep, dark hole where they can’t hurt anybody. And then just…” she trails off, taking a deep breath. “Keep being you.”

With that, she walks away, leaving Mac alone in the kitchen, racking his brain to figure out what that last part means.

*****

Later that night, Mac tosses and turns, replaying Conrad’s words. Once we’re rid of them and the insufferables who elected them, this country will be better off. They seem off-kilter, like what the man said and what he really meant are misaligned. Mac sighs, rubbing his face.

Another bolt of lightning illuminates the bedroom, and Mac automatically counts the seconds until he hears thunder rumbling in the distance. The storm is moving closer.

Beside him, Riley lies on her back with her eyes closed, although her breathing is too light for her to be asleep. Mac wonders if her mind is just as loud and chaotic as his.

For Riley’s sake, he hopes it’s not.

*****

Sleep never finds Mac.

The storm rages all through the night, but by the time dawn arrives, the thunder and wind dissipate, leaving just the steady downpour. The clouds are dark enough that Mac can hardly tell the sun even bothered to rise this morning.

When Riley’s alarm goes off, it’s like the shrill tone is mocking Mac for being awake. Riley groans as she shuts it off.

“Morning,” he mumbles. His throat hurts. He needs water. “Did you sleep well?”

Another groan. “No.”

“At least you slept,” Mac mutters.

Riley rolls onto her side, drawing one of the extra pillows into her chest. “Do you always toss and turn that much?”

It was his fault, he realizes, that she didn’t sleep. Mac suddenly feels guilty. “Sorry. And no.”

He expects Riley to be upset at being kept awake, but she isn’t. With a look that just might be understanding, she softly asks, “What were you thinking about?”

Mac can’t say that his thoughts whip around his mind like raindrops in last night’s storm. Not without sounding crazy, at least. So instead he says, “I don’t even know. I just have a bad feeling about this.”

“Me too,” Riley admits. “It feels off.” Her eyes are heavy, and Mac’s had enough early mornings with Riley to know it’s not just the lack of sleep weighing her down.

“Go back to sleep. I can handle the delivery.”

Riley rolls her eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not letting you do that by yourself.”

He doesn’t argue. “Okay.”

A moment passes between them. It’s been happening more and more lately—holding eye contact a little too long, sharing smirks when no one else is looking, stealing moments where it’s just the two of them and nothing else matters. Each one gives him hope that there’s not a wall between them, but instead, a door. Someone just has to be brave enough to open it.

Sitting up, Riley quipps, “Just don’t make me regret letting you sleep in the bed with me.” Mac snorts.

“No promises.”

~ Tag List ~ Want to be added? Send me an ask.

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#beth writes #macriley #macgyver #macgyver fanfiction #angus macgyver #riley davis #looking through a window au

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tundrainafrica · 3 years

Note

Hi, i saw some time ago you compared Royai to Levihan, would you mind elaborating more on their similarities? I ship both and looking at they compared blow my mind

YES. Beautiful ask anon! As always, sorry for only getting into this now, my inbox is still a mess I am currently trying to make sense of. But legit, I could talk about this for hours. Cause I’m that fucking simp who just randomly goes on Youtube and watches the Riza breakdown vs. Lust scene just to see some GREATTT acting and some great crumbs.

So anyway, will be moving on now to this really long and--mind you--uncurated rant.

Disclaimer though: Although I have watched all the fullmetal stuff, from the first anime, to brotherhood to the manga and have lurked in the fanfiction sites long before (like fam, this anime is literally my childhood it’s such a big part of my life that when I hear ‘mustang’ I think of roy mustang not the car), but at this point, the main story line for me is a blur and I probably just remember only the Roy scenes and the Royai scenes well.

I was not a big fan of Edwin for multiple reasons.

Warning: Spoilers abound for FMA so read at your own risk. And for people who watch FMA but not AOT, spoilers abound for AOT is well.

So there are a lot of similarities between Levihan and Royai and I think this is the reason why Levihan definitely appealed to me a lot as a couple. Royai after all was my OG ‘I think I wanna be in this type of relationship’ type of couple.

Military Setting

I’ve always found these types of relationships interesting cause I like to think, you’re in such a high stakes and very stringent atmosphere where you could die at any moment and you’re constantly doing such morally grey things. And with that, people have the tendency to either close in on themselves and just keep to themselves or just go crazy over time. Yet you have people who find the time to form CLOSE and almost ROMANTIC bonds with your fellow soldiers

And I just like the process of exploring how this happens. And you know what makes it juicier?

2. The commander to the subordinate dynamic (with a twist)

The boss to the follower dynamic because Royai and Levihan are both incredibly healthy and stable relationships but they both come from something taboo right? A commander to subordinate relationship? So we ask ourselves? How did they both make it work?

Well, what I notice is despite the implied respect Riza and Levi both hold for Roy and Hange respectively, due to their positions in the military, do you notice Hange and Roy still have respect over Levi and Riza’s opinions. I cannot remember all the scenes in both shows but remember that scene where Riza would just stop Roy half way into fighting when it’s raining because sometimes he does forget that he can’t do his fire thing when it’s raining? It shows obviously that Riza could undermine his decisions if she finds them completely idiotic or out of the blue. Or that scene where Roy was curbstomping Envy when he found out Envy killed Hughes?

So, the thing is Levi and Hange worked like this too. Even before Hange became commander, I think there was an already implied hierarchical difference between being ‘squad leader’ and being ‘team captain.’ Squad leader’s are generally in a higher position and command a much larger group and do you see how Levi approaches Hange? Like when telling her off about risking her life when trying to capture the titan?

And even when she was commander, that telepathy scene?? Can we appreciate, that when Hange became commander (compared to when Erwin was commander), Levi took the reins of a lot of the leading in the survey corps, as if he understood his job wasn’t just to follow Hange but to take care of her?

Like I’m sure Riza saw her job more as a caretaker to Roy more than his subordinate and seeing this in Levihan was just fantastic.

And another thing I love about both of them...

3. They were just the two competent level headed people

This is such a trope for me. I cannot handle couples where someone is just not competent or is so obviously underpowered compared to the other. Like I want them to be able to handle themselves without the other. And even when they’re alone they’re doing shit and you just find out later, by the way I have this bf/gf/partner who is equally competent. But when we’re together we just share one brain cell because we can practically melt when we’re safe with the other.

And the thing is since they’re in a military setting we don’t see them ‘practically melt,’ we can usually just pick out the crumbs (ehem 126), and the fact that these crumbs are such rare gems, makes it all the jucier.

And here’s the thing, in animes and in stories, this ‘competent people’ couple is usually supporting cast cause I dunno? Nobody wants to hear about the competent couple who just figured out they like each other and they just like hanging out with each other for some reason?

And most adventure stories are underdog stories where we watch people start of as dead weight and get stronger which is not boring per se but I dunno, these couples usually dont’ appeal to me fsr because I’m all for the power couple dynamic and the protagonists always have something going on making them doubt their strength so yeah. And there’s usually this token love interest who’s not as strong and tries not to be useless but is kinda dead weight.

4. Their special abilities?

Levi and Hange are a power couple the way Roy and Riza are. When these two couples were introduced into their respective stories, they were all well established as bad asses. We have humanity’s strongest, humanity’s smartest then in FMA we have the flame alchemist one of the strongest alchemists and we have Riza who’s crazy good with a gun.

5. They were never that in your face couple

As said above, I really love competent people ships but nobody really likes reading about people being competent and having their level headed shit together so these characters end up with more of supporting character energy who have their ‘big damn heroes’ moments where they swoop in and save the protagonist.

And the thing is, since they’re supporting characters, there’s so much more room to move when contemplating such couples because the crumbs are there? But at the same time they’re not there? And since I like exploring my own headcanons about those ‘boring’ yet incredibly stable and mature relationships, these tend to be my favorite characters to shoehorn into my spotify playlists.

Edwin and Eremika respectively have more ‘in your face’ crumbs and I dunno, their crumbs for me always seemed to be too obviously there where I was like ‘okay cute relationship’ but ‘I wouldn’t wanna be in a relationship like that’ kinda way.

And since main protagonist romantic subplots crumbs are already ‘in my face’ I end up thinking to myself, what’s there to headcanon?

And like they go through so much more problems romance wise since obviously they are the protagonist. But I guess for me, I never liked those couples who were so obviously together and go through problems that bystanders are aware of. Because I dunno, people might not agree with me but it doesn’t sit well with me when EVERYBODY knows about the problems between two certain people in a relationship.

I always liked those couples who just start off as two people hanging out together and then like five years you find out, they live together and have five cats and it turns out they’ve been married for two of those three years.

And power couples just make it work? Because the stories tend to focus on them being competent people more than being in love so when the coupling actually happens it’s like:

“Wow you live together and have five cats, you worked so hard for it, I’m so happy for you.”

Instead of you know, watching people go through like 3456 instances of miscommunication drama just to end up in a still seemingly doubtful relationship.

6. Iconic scenes for Levihan and Royai?

And here’s the beautiful thing about the crumbs of both of these ships, they are incredibly apparent when the stakes are high and this is *chef’s kiss.* This is literally the climax, the peak to such subtle crumbs. Like okay, fine it’s satisfying to see the main protagonist and their main love interest doing shit and loving each other when the stakes are high like in Season 2 of AOT with Mikasa thinking she’s gonna die so she confesses to Eren or maybe that Naruto and HInata scene in the Pain Arc where Hinata just pops in and saves Naruto and kinda dies in the process

But can we all agree that there is something very very very satisfying about seeing two people who are probably not or are probably dating just going crazy for each other when the stakes are high? Like yo, come on.

My favorite scenes for Royai: The Lust fight scene, the Envy fight scene and lastly, the scene where Roy opens the gates to save Riza and goes blind. Can we just appreciate the fact that Roy risked his Colonel dreams to save Riza by going blind??

And for Levihan? I’m sure Levihans are tired of hearing the chapter numbers but 115? That’s fucking iconic, Hange ltierally jumped into the river with Levi and please tell me that is not a parallel to Roy opening the gates for an already half dead Riza. Mind you, Hange did not even know if Levi would make it or not and she probably didn’t know if she would make it or not either. Any of the soldiers could have literally just shot into the river and nicked them with bullets. She just literally abandoned everything and wooshed to the river.

And I had this convo with a few other people and we were thinking about what if it was anyone else who found Levi. And we came to the conclusion that IT HAD TO BE HANGE. Because somehow, I feel like Hange would have been one of the only few, if not the only one who would have gathered up the courage to jump into the river and risk their own life to save Levi.

And for the next part... Disclaimer: This is just my opinion, please let’s not start a ship war.

Like with the war on twitter “Levihan vs. Eruri,” I started to reflect as well on whether or not Erwin would have saved Levi if he was there instead of Hange but I think it is less likely that Erwin would have saved Levi. Erwin probably wouldn’t have agreed with the rumbling definitely but I cannot help but think, Erwin approached his commander position like a chess master and with this, approached Levi as a superior while Hange approached Levi as an equal and a best friend.

So if, saving Erwin was just going to mess with plans let’s say to manipulate the Yaegerists for some greater purpose, would Erwin have just let Levi die?

7. The magic is no one fits Roy or Riza perfectly.

I had these same thoughts with Shikatema vs. Levihan and now Royai vs. Levihan. So comparing their dynamics, I just have to say, that none of them fit each other perfectly. Hange has Riza and Roy crumbs and Levi has Riza and Roy crumbs too.

Like Roy is some ridiculously strong (Levi) superior (Commander Hange) with a seemingly goofy personality (Hange). Riza is the subordinate (Levi) who’s equally reliable but not as overpowered (Hange) with a very strict but very obviously emotionally constipated personality (Levi)

Like if you put Levihan in some of the token Royai moments. Like the Lust fight? I think Levi would have done something similar to Riza. Okay, he wouldn’t have broken down right then but he would have done something similar to what Roy did when he found out Envy killed Hughes.

I’m convinced Hange would have had a breakdown which is more of an in between between what Roy (Envy fight) and Riza (Lust fight) had in their respective fights. I mean 115 is proof enough that Hange ain’t playing when her bebeluvs is in danger.

8. And towards the end of the series?

Okay this is where the comparisons just kinda diverge because this part makes me sad. In the end game, Royai worked together. Riza became the eyes of Roy when he was making shit explode in the final battle coz he was blind.

And Hange and Levi were completing each other towards the of the AOT end right? Not just with the jian bird references with having parallel injuries. In the final battle though when Levi was out of commission due to the explosion, Hange was the one fighting with the crew until 132. And the moment she died, Levi stepped up and fought right?

Like they had something similar going on, where these two were covering for each other and taking care of the kids. It’s just that compared to Royai who were explicitly working together, we have Hange covering for Levi right after he got injured and Levi stepping up to cover for Hange after she died.

AND I can’t help but think, literally post time skip just could not handle Levihan working together huh? Is that how competent Levi and Hange are as soldiers that Yams couldn’t let them work together just one last time? Like he knew it would mess with the story if he lets Levi and Hange lead at full power?

Which brings me to last point, and the point that makes me saddest.

9. About them being endgame?

Okay, so it wasn’t confirmed that Roy and Riza ended up together because Roy still had his fuhrer goals but AT LEAST THEY HAD A CHANCE? Like their last scene in the show was still them together? And Riza still at least got to follow him?

Levihan… They just… shit just happened and we all know what happened and now I’m reading fanfiction and crying over fcitoonal characters to pass the quarantine.

Anyway, if you reached this point, thank you for reading. And thank you for the question anon!

#levihan #meta #royai

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whoaffle · 3 years

Text

Today a person of my family was complimenting and admiring Bozos' stupid-ass fucking penis-shaped rocket...

They kept talking about how it's "amazing" and "genius" and whatever... They were really impressed by the whole "show" and by the technology used and I GET that on one hand, because it IS something different and new and it is impressive (which doesn't mean it is good, I'll develop later), and this person is much older than me and they kept insisting on how, for them, in the past, this would have sounded impossible and how it's amazing that it's happening! That one person would manage to fund that by himself and not a whole country! (which again, impressive, NOT good. The fact that ONE person has the same amount of money as a large country, while others are poorer and poorer every day... The slow erasure of a middle class as social inequality becomes more and more severe every day... The fact that all this money was conquered by exploiting several poorly paid workers in shitty jobs with bad conditions... All those are symptoms of a DEATHLY ill economic system that not only has gone WRONG already but still insists on pretending to be functional while dragging down everyone along with it to the absolute limit before it collapses entirely on itself, leaving a painful scar on the people it took advantage of AND on the planet it has exploited for so long).

Going back to the point, I get it that "space travel" is a magical sci-fi dream for many people, both young and old, and that older people who think differently from most of us young adult Tumblr users would be super impressed by it, BUT... This is still so... So bad! Most of it - if not everything about it - is such an absurd scenario!

Well, knowing by previous experience that criticizing Bezos' amount of money and how he acquired it would be useless and that he'd end up defended anyways, I tried criticizing the ecological aspect of the whole thing first! But the answer I got was "Hah! A lot of stuff pollutes the world much more and no one talks about it", which, like... 1- Your point being?? That's no excuse to ignore absolutely useless shit like this polluting the earth even more just so billionaires can feel special because they can go to space while millions of people starve, die and suffer. Besides the fact that insisting on investing in this kind of technology instead of trying to prioritize Eco-friendly technologies and research is PRECISELY why a lot of other things pollute so much more - because every time someone comes up with something new they insist on not giving a fuck about the environmental aspect of their tech... So both the issues are correlated, this is not a "different thing that is less important" this is ONE of the symptoms. And 2 - Yes we DO talk about it, very often, all the time, and we hate it, and criticize it, and wish it would change. How many younger people are legit extremely worried about the environment and about the several ways governments, industries and other large-scale processes like that damage the environment? Damn, we DO complain about those!

But OK. Didn't wanna argue, so I started just using my phone instead... Then another person joins the conversation. The two of them are now like "This technology may not be put to good use now, the Space Tourism is a bad idea and it's stupid... BUT they could use the same device for other kinds of travel! Something from the technology used here could be used later for useful projects! Imagine, we could use the same rocket type tech to make commercial international flights, for example!" and I was silently thinking "Yeah right and emit even MORE useless pollution just because people wanna get to other places EVEN faster! And just because some idiots who have the money would pay THAT MUCH to be able to go faster to Paris or whatever!"

That is NOT NECESSARY and it is not SUSTAINABLE, it is not viable in long-term! Why would we use this kind of shit that is MORE expensive and MORE pollution-emitting?? Because it's faster?? Well let me tell you something then! Being faster is not only unnecessary but in this context we are living right now, it's A BAD IDEA, because our society is ALREADY deeply sick about the need to speed up literally everything and everyone has anxiety and is unable to wait a single second for anything, and so they expect faster and faster results every time, and companies - who LOVE not giving a shit about workers' mental health and well-being - expect more and more and more in less time! And this adds up pressure and stress on people's lives - which, by the way, is one of the things THIS very person from my family always complains about 'modern days'... The fact is that if traveling between continents FASTER became an actual accessible thing, that would probably just become another stupid insane standard for our already impossible-to-keep-up-with lives! Because if you travel abroad so quickly, then you are expected to get back to work on the same day and fuck jet-lag... Or anything similar! I don't know!

Anyway, I did go on a tangent here because I'm so angry and I started ranting over my rant. Let me go back to the POINT.

I was silent all the time as they kept talking about it, because honestly, no matter what I replied, they'd be like "You're too radical!", "don't exaggerate", "there are much worse things" and SPECIALLY "but the scientific advancement!"

And my WHOLE POINT HERE is that this is NOT "advancement"! It is scientific creation, development even if you will, but not "advancement"! Because it emits ridiculous amounts of carbon and other kinds of pollution in a planet that is already suffering so much environmentally and literally CANNOT HANDLE that anymore!

It is not advancement if its so expensive that only the 1% people (who hold most the money in the world) can pay for it, while billions of others just watch and starve and die in floods and fires CAUSED by that sort of shit!

That’s not "advancement"! That is fucking technological masturbation coming from egocentric morons who only want to get more money and show off!

Advancement would be coming up with actual, real solutions that help people in their daily lives! Advancement would be coming up with technologies and solutions that would work BETTER for everyone and not just to fill billionaire's asses with MORE money! It would be to find new ways to do what we do today without destroying the environment, or finding new cheaper ways to produce products and services so that more people can have access to them! And this is the absolute OPPOSITE of that! It is insisting on a way of doing things that is outdated, unsustainable and destructive, and that doesn't FIT our reality anymore and should be left BEHIND while we still have time to change!

BESIDES scientific advancement has been happening ALL OVER the world for CENTURIES and all we need is that the RIGHT technologies get attention and investment. Eco-friendly technology EXISTS we could clean the seas, we could generate free electricity for all, we could invest on lab grown meat, we could do SO much that would be actually useful and nice and helpful, but instead those sons of BITCHES only want to play in space and maybe some day run away when the planet is too sick to be fixed, leaving us - the poor ones - behind to die.

The fact is that we don't need cocky, bastard, exploitative billionaires to have scientific advancement! It would exist anyway, perhaps in better ways! And people should STOP considering technologies that are more harmful to the world than helpful as "advancements"! Because they are not, they are a problem, they are like if a man invented a flamethrower inside a house that is literally on fire and everyone found it amazing because "now we can set fire on stuff more easily and faster" yeah like, AWESOME but can we solve the PROBLEMS caused by that instead??

And honestly, I hate the excuse that "space represents hope for many people in a world that is bound to destruction" like, there would be NO need to go to space to begin with if we focused on fixing what's wrong instead of that ridiculous bullshit disguised as research or whatever when it's obviously just two things: showing off their horrible amounts of money and making MARKETING of an unnecessary service that will only benefit those who already have the easiest lives of all of us while causing issues to all others! JUST so that these billionaires can make MORE money. It's DISGUSTING.

There is NOTHING wrong about space travel as a concept, nothing wrong with researching and developing technologies that may allow us to explore space! Space exploration would be AWESOME! BUT if we're gonna work on something like that, we have to develop it in a way that doesn't harm the world EVEN MORE. We have to have priorities! We have to focus on NOT destroying this planet, for FUCK'S sake! And if the only way we have to explore space right now is by damaging our already fucked up environment even more, then NEWSFLASH, BABY - this is not the TIME to do space travel yet! AND SPECIALLY NOT FOR BILLIONAIRE SPACE TOURISM.

#RANT #long post #angry as fuck #my opinion #honest-fucking-ly #tired

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iloveyoutotype-moonandback · 3 years

Text

CW: gore, abuse and rape mentions.

So I recently played the original Tsukihime visual novel (it’s being remade so I might as well check out the original right?) and I wanted to talk about some of my general impressions and thoughts on it.

TL;DR for people who don’t wanna read any spoilers (or if you just don’t wanna read through my long-ass post): I thought it was good and there were lot of aspects and themes that I found interesting. I did have problems with certain aspects of it however, and I wouldn’t recommend it to everyone since it’s really violent and...well just see the CW for yourself. But if none of that deters you, then I think it’s worth checking out!

So, like I said above the cut, I enjoyed it overall. The story was interesting, with the focus being on vampires and some more information on the church for example (fate tends to focus more on the grail war, so other aspects of the Nasuverse are inevitably glossed over or not mentioned at all). This also had a psychological horror aspect, with Shiki having dreams where he kills people just to give one example. But then there are certain indications that what he’s seeing is real, leading him to believe that he could be unconsciously killing people. And he doesn’t WANT to see these dreams, he actually hates them to the point that there are a few scenes where he straight up avoids going to sleep altogether. The problem is that he has no idea how to stop seeing them, or even what’s happening to him. Also other characters often hide stuff from him or lie for his “protection”, so that really only adds to the uncertainty (this dude kinda gets gaslit a lot, come to think of it).

I remember seeing some people say that the artwork for this vn isn’t as good as what you get in fsn, which makes sense given that it’s older and thus earlier in Takeuchi’s art career. And I can see what they mean, but there’s legit some good CG’s in this one. Also it does this interesting thing where instead of drawn backgrounds, it has real life pictures that have been edited/stylized. I can’t quite articulate it, but it gives the vn a different vibe that really works for it imo. I like it.

In terms of characters, I gotta say that Hisui was one of my favorites. I guess I just kinda relate to her in a weird way. She’s quiet, isn’t super expressive (or at least it seems that way initially), and doesn’t like being touched. I used to be like that (I’m still like that sometimes but I’ve gotten a lot better), though obviously she has....very different reasons for being that way. But at that point my brain had already gone “that one” with her.

Speaking of Hisui, I really like Kohaku too. If we’re comparing Nasu’s works here, I feel like she’s kind of comparable to Sakura. Mostly in a thematic sense, seeing as how she’s someone who appears normal enough but there’s a lot brewing beneath the surface that we don’t fully see until her route (and by that I mean she suffered sexual abuse from Shiki and Akiha’s father when she was a child). I don’t want to compare them too much tho, since they are different characters at the end of the day. It’s just something of a common thread I noticed. Though with Kohaku, you do actually get a glimpse into what her deal is in Hisui’s route (mainly in the epilogue), which then leads right into Kohaku’s route.

Outside of the two maids, Arcueid was another favorite of mine (if Hisui is my favorite, I’d say Arc is a close second) because she looks elegant at first but then you realize she’s a fuckin dork the moment she opens her mouth (and I love her for it). Ciel was cool too, and it was interesting to have a member of the church who’s more sympathetic than Kirei Ketamine over there (though as her route reveals, the church is still kinda fucked). I liked Akiha as well. It was really interesting seeing her develop across the 3 “far side of the moon” routes. At first you think she’s normal then op, turns out she’s part vampire and is actually pretty fucking powerful! That said, I did have a few problems with her route...

...which leads me into one of my criticisms of this vn. Akiha’s route was my least favorite out of the 5. Again, and I cannot stress this enough, it is not because of Akiha herself. Akiha good and cool. The issue here is Akiha and Shiki...basically fall in love and also fuck at one point. Did I mention that Akiha is Shiki’s little sister? Because she is. “Well Shiki was adopted so it’s not technically incest” don’t make me tap the sign:

Like yeah, I know “romance happens between Shiki and the main heroin of the route” is a common thread here but I’d like it if they made just one exception. Sibling relationships are good too, you don’t need to resort to romance.

And, well, now that it’s been brought up already: this vn has sex scenes! And they were just as bad as I expected! I did read through one or two, but after that I just started either skimming through them or skipping entirely. A lot of them don’t really effect the story much (except for like, one which is actually kinda important) so most of them aren’t really worth it unless you just want to laugh at the weird lines. Not a big deal but I felt like it was worth mentioning at least.

Moving on, Tsukihime did have some problematic elements outside of the whole incest thing. Fate/Stay Night had its own issues and obviously Tsukihime will have them too. Tbf to Nasu, he did say he later regretted some of the stuff he wrote in this early period. It’s good that he’s grown as a person and a writer, because looking back there are definitely a few lines here that are really fucking bad. One that stuck out to me was this line from Arcueid’s route where Shiki is arguing with Ciel and then he just suddenly says something along the lines of, “if you try to stop me from going, I’ll rape you right here”. It’s right the fuck out of nowhere too. And like, the reasoning was that he could barely walk at that point so he just came up with some super threatening thing to say, but it was just really unnecessary.

Actually, I think the same could be said about some of the sexual violence depicted. Like, there’s a whole recurring thing where Shiki will just suddenly get possessed to murder someone (because his vampire step-brother basically lives in his mind rent-free) and he mentions the arousal he gets from doing so. At several points he even acts on these impulses, and winds up getting hard and cumming as he cuts someone up into pieces. It’s...really fucking weird and I’m not sure what it adds by being there. It adds a creep factor for sure, but ig it’s a question of how necessary it actually is. Some of it is integral to the story, as is the case with...certain aspects of the Arcueid and Kohaku routes for example. So don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying remove it entirely, I’m just questioning some of the extra stuff that doesn’t seem totally necessary to me.

So all in all, while I did have some problems with it, Tsukihime isn’t bad by any means. Like I said before, I think it was good overall and I enjoyed it. You can acknowledge the problematic elements of something, but still otherwise like it. But yeah, certainly not for everyone, but still worth playing in 2021 I think.

#tsukihime #nasuverse #type-moon #also i didn't mention it but #this vn came out the same year i was born #so that's neat #this game is only 4 months younger than me #tsukihime is in college #long post

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star-trekkin-across-theuniverse · 3 years

Text

Worthy (pt6)

A/N: once again - just keep poking me until I start tagging you if you want tagged. @rampant-salamander, @bolontiku

...

I looked from Tony to Thor and back to Tony.

“I don’t understand your question,” I responded, and threw back the drink. To hell with being moderate. I was pretty sure I was about to lose my dream job on my second day, I may as well go out with a bang.

“Ella, there has to be something special about you to allow you to lift that hammer,” Tony spoke slowly. That was probably a bad thing. I suspected slow speech meant a really active brain. I was now a mystery that needed to be solved.

“There is nothing special about me at all,” I argued.

“You can lift Mjolnir. That is special.” Thor was like a sage who spoke in riddles.

“But being able to lift Mjolnir isn’t what makes me special enough to lift it. That’s a redundancy.” I, like Tony, was slipping into scientific method in order to try to sort things out.

“Do you have Aesir blood, Ella?” Thor asked.

“My family is from Washington. By way of Wisconsin,” I replied. Tony snorted and Thor shot him a dirty look.

“Before this Wisconsin?” He pressed. The way he said Wisconsin made it sound unfamiliar and strange.

“Norway and England.”

“Norway. That is where the Northmen resided.” Thor looked thoughtful. “In the time of the Vikings, the Aesir traveled on Midgard much more frequently than they do now.”

“Are you suggesting that some ancestor of mine got knocked up by a god?” I could feel my eyebrow rising. Tony smothered a smirk behind his hand. My tone was lost on Thor.

“We are not gods, Ella,” Thor corrected. “And I am unfamiliar with knocked up. What I suggest is that your ancestor was impregnated by an Aesir.”

“But in order to lift your hammer, wouldn’t it have to be you that got this mystery ancestor pregnant? I’d have to be your descendent?” I could feel the blood draining from my face. It would be just my luck that the hottest guy I’d ever seen would be related to me. Thor’s smile was mischievous.

“Not necessarily. I would have discovered offspring of mine on Midgard by now, and I know left none. But I think it reasonable to consider you may have Aesir blood in your veins,” he explained. “Which makes you very special indeed.”

“Can everyone in Asgard lift your hammer?” I asked. Thor shook his head.

“None but I.”

“Then I don’t buy it. I keep telling people, I’m nothing special.” I was getting frustrated with the scrutiny. I never thought I would be desperate for a cute guy to stop paying attention to me, but in that moment, I would have given anything to be able to just go hide in obscurity in the lab, building my washing machine.

“But that’s where you’re wrong, Ella,” Tony interrupted. I’d nearly forgotten he was there, Thor had such powerful bearing. I didn’t think it was possible to lose track of Tony Stark, but I guess in the presence of not-actually-gods… “You are something special. That’s why Pepper and I lept on your application like we did. How did you make it through university with such a bad self image?”

“I don’t have a bad self image. I know I’m a fucking amazing engineer. I just fail to see a correlation between my ability to understand math and build things and my purported mystical ability to lift a magic hammer,” I snapped. I turned back to Thor. “You’re sure no one else can lift it?” Thor glanced at Tony, almost as though he was looking for approval. Tony gave a slight nod.

“I believe that Captain Rogers would be able to lift it, should he have the opportunity. But that remains untested,” Thor admitted. I sighed.

“Of course. He’s a legit hero. Full of righteousness and honour and nobility.” My tone was more sarcastic than I’d intended.

“Yes, intangible and arbitrary measures of worthiness. Who is to say you don’t meet the parameters in some way?” Thor shot back. I looked into my empty glass, wishing it were still full.

“Did you not see me level that d-bag in the elevator?”

“Tis nothing I would not have done myself, and yet I am still worthy,” Thor shrugged. Pepper had walked in at some point during the conversation, and Tony turned to her expectantly. She sighed and blinked slowly.

“We’ve had a discussion about appropriate professional behaviour. He is aware that if there are any further incidents he will lose his internship.” Pepper reached out for the glass of wine Tony was offering her.

“It’s a bit of a PR nightmare if we lose a second intern in as many days, Pep,” Tony commented.

“It’s a worse nightmare if, right as we’re rolling out a gender equality program and girl’s STEM mentorship program, the media gets ahold of information about how we’re allowing someone guilty of sexual harassment to remain in a prestigious and competitive internship,” she retorted. He pursed his lips and paused. After a moment he nodded in agreement.

“What do I know? You’re the boss.” His acquiescence was met with laughter from Pepper.

“What do you know, Tony? How many times did you attend the SHIELD seminar again?” She choked on her wine. “Trust me. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. He’s a smart guy, and I’d like to think he’ll be respectful from now on.” Tony responded with some other comment and I slumped back into my seat, watching the show. If you didn’t know they were stupidly in love with one another, you might assume they were on the verge of war. But I think Tony liked to goad Pepper, and she rose to the bait. Not because she was gullible though. At least, I didn’t think it was because she was easily duped. I think she rose to the bait because it was how they clicked together. I looked away from them and over to Thor, who was sitting back on the couch, completely relaxed. The hammer was propped up beside him, handle leaning against the bolster. It was uncanny how powerful he looked, even in jeans and a t-shirt. I relaxed a little and just enjoyed looking at him, taking in the contours of his biceps, and the definition of the veins in his hands. There was a lot of him to look at, and it was all very pleasing to the eye. At least, everything I’d seen thus far.

I didn’t realize how overt I was being until he smirked. He turned to look at me, and nodded.

“Is it not considered poor manners on Midgard to stare at others?” There was a teasing tone to his voice, but I blinked and looked away, feeling my cheeks colour.

There was really no way for me to deny that I was staring at him. The only blank wall in the entire place was right behind him. I couldn’t even beg being distracted by some of the weird art that seemed to be all over the building.

“I, uh, well,” I stammered. “I was looking at the hammer?” It sounded like bullshit, even to me. I heard a stifled laugh from Tony and shot him a filthy look. I pushed myself to my feet and glanced at Pepper. “If you don’t need me, Pepper, I’m going to try to catch up with Angela. I have some things I need to pick up for my suite.”

“You can order anything you need from distribution,” Tony offered.

“Except, apparently, towels bigger than a postage stamp,” I retorted. My ears were burning and I was having a really hard time not looking over to see if Thor was following the conversation. He probably was as there was no one else for him to pay attention to.

“You are aware there’s varying sizes of towel?” Tony’s tone was sarcastic. I rolled my eyes.

“Not that this is really a conversation I feel I want to have with my boss, but I grabbed the biggest one. It still barely covered me.” I was ready to pray for a hole to open in the floor and swallow me.

“Well, you’re not exactly supposed to be lounging around in your tow –“

“I wasn’t!” I interrupted. “I was just getting out of the shower when Thor showed up and I didn’t have time to be getting fully dressed before I answered the door, and then the towel slipped and oh my god I cannot believe I’m telling you all this.” I took a deep breath and looked back to Pepper. “Can I go? Please?”

“Let me walk you to the elevator,” she offered and led the way. As we walked away, I heard Tony clear his throat.

“You’ve seen her naked already, you sly dog?”

“That is enough, Stark. How you have lived so many years on this realm and not noticed how modest some of your women are, I have no idea. But you embarrassed her. Like many Midgardians, she lacks comfort with the physical form.” Thor’s words were a chastisement, and I somehow felt even more embarrassed about him having seen me naked. Because now, not only was I naked in front of the freaking Norse god of thunder, but also he took more notice of what a prude I am than that I was naked. I leaned against the wall and banged my head against it.

“That’s not how you call the elevator,” Pepper teased. “I know we all collectively keep telling you to relax, but, yeah. Relax. If Tony is already giving you a hard time, he’s assimilating you into his world as a permanent fixture. This will be something you laugh about in future years.” Her eyes were warm with empathy and it was so reassuring.

“You seriously need to do something about the towel situation, Pepper.” I stepped onto the elevator and pushed the button for my floor. Once the doors shut, I texted Angela to see how far she’d got without me. I didn’t have to wait long. I was swiping my passcard to get into my room when she stepped off the elevator.

“So, towels? Maybe a beer?” She followed me into my apartment.

“Yes. To both.”

XXX

For whatever reason, I expected getting beer with Angela would be more Sex-in-the-City than it was. She pulled me into a quiet bar after we’d found appropriate towels, and we ordered wings from the kitchen and beer.

“So I did some research today while you were meeting with Markus,” she volunteered over a heap of wing bones. I made a noise that was easily interpretable as curiosity and she continued. “I might have hacked some of Tony’s files about that hammer. Thor wasn’t kidding around when he said you shouldn’t be able to lift it. It was apparently forged in the heart of a dying star, of some crazy space-metal. And the Odin enchanted it so only Thor could lift it. Which is clearly a broken enchantment because apparently you can lift it too.”

“It says right on it that if you’re worthy, you can lift it,” I corrected her with my mouth full.

“Obviously it doesn’t take table manners into consideration!” She laughed. I hung my head in mock-shame, but made sure my mouth was clear before I spoke again.

“I don’t know how it determines worthiness. Honestly, isn’t that a little creepy? Is the hammer sentient? Does it consider the merits of each individual that touches it in that split second between grabbing it and trying to lift it? Or does Odin have some sort of approval system for worthiness, and he gets interrupted from whatever it is he’s doing to approve people in that same fraction of an instant?” I pondered.

“Way to ruin magic with science,” she groaned.

“Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. That’s Clarke’s Third Law. The other two are pretty good too,” I shrugged.

“Oh, that was a kill shot! Come on, let me have some sort of fantasy about the mystical powers of the damn hammer, Ella!” Angela threw her hands up in frustration. I smiled and nodded.

“Of course. The hammer is mystical and powerful and absolutely should not be questioned,” I acceded. Angela swatted at me and flagged the waitress over for another round. I felt myself relaxing and forgetting about the overwhelming stress of the past couple of days as we decompressed over a second beer. When Angela dropped me back at the tower, I realized she may very well live on-site as well, but I was tired and had a bit of a beer buzz and forgot to ask before stumbling through my door and crashing on the sofa.

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hyperesthesias · 3 years

Text

warnings: nsft 18+ ; allusions to past sexual assault. ; really fucking tragic. legit made myself cry. ; no proofreading.

words: 2.9k

summary(?): the one time crosshair finds happiness, it goes horribly awry. something of a study about how the clones are treated like droids, and how neither of them have any rights or autonomy.

notes: this isn’t really formatted necessarily, but i had to get this out so i could focus on another piece of writing im working on. feedback is always appreciated!

fic idea where the bad batch are sent on a prolonged stealth training mission before the official start of the clone wars and they wind up staying at this shady inn. crosshair breaks his arm and shoulder and stays there alone while the others move ahead with the mission. he meets the inn’s VERY shady owner and his blind server droid, ADA-565, a female looking droid of a type he’s never seen before. she’s very skittish and soft spoken, especially around the inn’s owner. later that evening the inn’s owner offers ADA to crosshair as a pleasure droid. it both confuses and insults crosshair deeply, but he allows ADA into his room.

He takes her into his room and she seems to know her way around it very well, he remarks how he’s never seen a droid like her before, and she says her line has been discontinued for many years. She doesn’t know what happened to her sisters, but she heard that any remaining ADA’s that had been found by the manufacturer were recalled and ‘decommissioned’. When he asks why, she says they were neurally defective -- she goes onto explain that the ADA’s neural networks began to grow and expand beyond that which they’d been calibrated for. Crosshair doesn’t immediately understand the extent of what she means, but he understand she’s very different than any droid he has met before, and he says as much. She assumes he is attempting to flirt with her and she says there’s no need to flirt, that she will have sex with him regardless -- it’s what she was programmed for. He is immediately taken aback and disgusted when he begins to put together she is sad, even scared. She is not a droid at all, he comes to the conclusion, she’s more of a person locked in a metal and plastoid body. He tells her he doesn’t want to have sex with her, he wanted to separate her from the owner so he could speak to her, he wants to free her. “There isn’t much of a point,” she says, “Even if I am free, if I am found, I will die.” She sounds like a clone, he thinks. Or clones sound like droids -- and he’s not sure which is worse.

He offers for her to stay with him in his room as a reprieve from the owner. She thinks, and considers, and agrees. She searches her way around the room and finds the chair in the corner, he offers to take it instead and she can have the bed, if she wanted to sleep -- does she sleep? She laughs, and it takes him off guard, he doesn’t hear much laughter, especially from a woman. She can sleep, she says, but she never gets much of it. He understands. More than he should.

Two months go by and as his arm heals, he finds he’s gotten close to Ada, she’s become more of a confidant than he’s ever had before, a friend, rather than a brother like he’s used to. She has begun to trust him almost instinctively, and she’s fascinated with the concept of his heightened eyesight. He often describes the sunsets to her. He’s horribly uncomfortable at first when she asks him to describe himself to her, but the way her hands feel his features -- she’s cold, but her fingers begin to warm the longer she lingers against his skin -- he states he looks much different than the rest of the clones, that he’s...defective, too.

He continues to let her ‘sleep’ in his room, and at one point she remarks that she’s cold. He asks if she’d like him to sleep next to her, and she agrees. She is terribly cold, and when he asks if she can feel she tells him she can, but not like he can -- but she can still feel, hear, sing. She likes singing, and he’s noticed she’s very good at it, though it sounds different than any human voice he’s heard.

They begin to have conversations about what they want in life -- if they even can want things in life. “What is it that you want? Not what you’re...programmed to do?” he asks, almost as if he’s asking himself. It takes her a long time to answer. But the way his hand is stroking her shoulder, the feel of his warm breath against her face, it soothes her and it reminds her of a recurring dream she holds onto. “I want to see the lake.” “Lake?” “I’ve heard many patrons talk about a lake near here. They say it’s beautiful -- especially in spring. I wish I could see it, the rocks, the trees, the flowers. I wish I could live there. I wonder what flowers smell like.” “You’ve never smelled a flower?” he grins, and remembers the first time he got a waft of the open air -- only six months ago. It surprised him, it felt dry at the back of his throat, but it made his brain alight. “I can’t smell,” she says, almost embarrassed, ashamed. This surprises him, too. “What do you smell like?” she giggles. He laughs -- he find he can laugh with her. It’s strange, odd, but a welcome uncertainty. “Ozone. A lot of it. Blasterfire, grime, dust.” She laughs. “Maybe it’s better i can’t smell after all.” He rolls his eyes and strokes her face. When did she become so beautiful? Had she always been?

Two weeks later he gets word the mission was a begrudging success -- it was a difficult mission, but they’d be returning to the inn within two days time. He’s...disappointed, and he’s not sure why. Until he gets it all at once -- and he hates himself for it: pretending he could have a life, pretending he could be something he’s not. Pretending he could actually be...a person. It sets him in a foul mood, and it troubles Ada, especially when he’s curt with her. She’s offended, and leaves him alone for a while, until he seeks her out. She’s sitting outside at the back of the inn, she’s sitting in the sunlight, feeling the warmth of it on her skin. He sits next to her and explains his brothers are coming back -- which means he’s leaving, too. She doesn’t respond for a while, but after a few minutes she puts her head on his shoulder and holds his hand -- as though if she held him tight enough, he wouldn’t leave, that he’d stay, that they’d disappear together somewhere wonderful, somewhere by the lake.

He takes her chin with his finger, and presses his head to hers -- to his surprise, she knows what a Keldabe Kiss is, “I do still have a database,” she grins and chuckles. She leans a little further into him, until he presses his lips to hers. He holds her close to him. “I know what I want,” she says. “Are you sure?” he asks. “I’ve never been sure about anything in my life, but I have no question -- no question when it comes to you.” He’s never been chosen before, by anyone or anything, he’s never been loved.

“I’ve never had sex before,” she says, “I’ve been used for sex, but I’ve never...been a participant.” There is terrible shame in her voice, and she can’t bring her face anywhere towards him, it’s hidden into her shoulder. It angers him, to hear her speak of what she was put through, what she was created for. It’s different, it’s...not the same as his own creation, but the parallel is undeniable. That angers him, too. He caresses one finger against the crown of her head, pushing her hair back -- he wants to see her, he wants her to know he sees her. That he wants to. No matter what. She finally leans into his hand and he cradles her face. “If it makes you feel any better, I haven’t, either.” She smiles.

He’s so gentle with her, he takes her pace, her cue. He asks her to show him where, he wants to learn. No one had ever thought to bring her pleasure, no one had ever considered it. His mouth doesn’t want to leave her -- any part of her, the metal of her skin, the warmth of where her heart would be, of her middle. The way he touches her, where he touches her -- “It’s right here, the center of me,” she puts his hand to just above her navel, where she is the most sensitive, where the bundle of wires lay just beneath -- it’s all intentional, it’s all full of passion, intensity. She’s never experienced anything like it -- she feels like she’s full of stars, full of light and brightness, energy that cannot be contained, and she wonders if not for a moment, if this is what it felt to be human. Ada lies there, once her world stops spinning, once the two of them are spent and exhausted and elated, and can think of nothing but humanity, what it means to feel -- what it means to be. To be with someone she loved. To love and to live therein.

He tends to her carefully, softly, sweetly, and together they fall asleep; she, safe in his arms.

The day his brothers arrive, Crosshair pulls Tech aside and demands a favour -- and despite Tech’s tiredness, he agrees when Crosshair offers to clean and settle his gear. “What exactly is this favour?” “I need you to put Ada’s eyesight back together.” “ADA? You mean the droid? I’ve never seen anything quite like it,” he thinks aloud, “but I can do it.” “Her name...is Ada.” Tech has never seen his brother quite so attached to anyone or anything, besides his wordless devotion to rest of his batchmates. It takes him back, but he agrees, despite.

Ada will only allow Crosshair to switch off her power, and makes him promise to stay by her side, to make sure nothing happens. She’s never been so willingly vulnerable -- especially allowing someone to poke around in her head. Crosshair swears both protection and fealty to her, and lets her get comfortable in a soft chair before he gently switches off her power on the back of her neck. “Goodnight, cyrae,” he whispers. Tech now sees there is something...disturbingly different about ADA. He sees his brother’s attachment and cautions him against attachment, they will be leaving in two days time. “Just get it done,” he tells him.

The moment Ada opens her eyes again, her vision is a white and color blotched blur -- with a tan and black and silver blur right in front of her. It’s talking to her, and she recognizes his voice instantly. As she begins to focus, she sees Crosshair with his hands on either side of her face. He’s searching her -- making sure she can see. Her eyes are no longer dark, but illuminated with a solid yellow-white color. “Cyrae? Can you hear me? Can you see me?” The image in front of her becomes clearer and she smiles -- it’s reactive, instinctual, to smile at the sight of her lover. Her hands go to his face and she holds him carefully, like small bird egg, that he would break if she touched him too harshly. “I see you -- I can see you!” She throws her arms around him and falls to her knees, they embrace, holding each other while knelt on the floor. “Is this what it feels like? To cry with joy? It’s such a strange feeling.” Crosshair kisses the side of her head and holds her arms as she stands. Tech performs some visual tests and clears his work as good, before he leaves his brother alone with the droid. With Ada. He figures the happiness -- however brief it might be -- would be beneficial to his morale. He leaves quietly and says not a word to his other brothers.

“Come with me,” he says, his head pressed against hers, “Come with me.” “Where would i go? How would I hide? I can’t.” “I’m not leaving you here, i’m not leaving without you free.” Ada agrees, knowing his fealty will ensure her safety, even if they were parted in the end.

The morning the batch are shipping out, Crosshair is disturbed from his duties with a shrill scream that comes from the back of the inn -- Ada’s scream. With a blaster in hand, he runs to find the inn owner with Ada by the neck. The owner swings her around and uses her as a shield. Crosshair can make the shot, he knows he can -- but the owner drags Ada out the back and throws her in a speeder and takes off. Crosshair commandeers the one beside it and takes off after him. The pursuit leads them through the marketplace, through stalls and alleyways, all the way to the outside of town. He can’t take a shot at the vehicle at the risk of injuring Ada, he creeps up next to it, and tries nudging the speeder to get him to slow down, to get him off course. But the owner shoves back, and pushes Crosshair’s speeder away. The owner pushes again and again -- focused on getting Crosshair to tailspin. He doesn’t see the pole before its too late -- Crosshair desperately tried pushing the speeder out of its way, but the speeder wraps itself around the metal.

“Ada!” he screams over the horrific screeching crunches as metal twists with metal twists with Ada. He jumps off the speeder and runs to her. She’s trapped in the wreckage. He pulls metal and carcass apart until he gets to her. She’s impaled with a piece of the chassis, she cries out when he removes it from her torso. He pulls her out and leans her against the wreckage. He’ll get his brother, he says, he’ll help. “There’s nothing he can do.” Her entire right side is crushed. She’ll need spare parts, there aren’t any in existence. She’s clutching his shoulder, the shell of him is breaking. They both know, there isn’t much time. “I know what I want,” she says. “What is it that you want?” his voice has never sounded so desperate, it hasn’t since.

Shes’ barely hanging onto any life that’s still circulating within her, but she’s clinging to it -- the minutes and seconds she has left with her lover. She’s in his arms, staring at his face, staring at the blue sky above him, the white clouds -- she’d almost forgotten what they looked like, their beauty. She knew them only from memories that’d turned into dreams. But this was no dream.

Crosshair leans her against the biggest, most beautiful tree he can find that overlooks the lake. There are birds that circle the water, that dive for fish, for a moment she smiles. If she had tears, they would have been stinging her eyes, staining the plastoid of her face. Crosshair sits next to her, watching the life transpiring around them, the irony biting him in the jugular. He’s bleeding without spilling a drop -- of blood or tears. She holds his hand, their palms resting in the green grass, the white clover buds. “I’m glad I was happy. I’m glad I had you.” He looks at her, the shell’s cracks widening. “I want you to do it,” she says. He hates that he knows what she means, his eyes close and his head falls. “I don’t want to wither,” she says. He can’t refuse her, “Just tell me when.” She leans against him, watching the clouds go by. If all her life she’d had nothing but fear, but brokenness, if all her life she longed for the sweet feeling of lake air brushed against her skin, if all her life she’d wanted to love and be loved, she felt her life had culminated. If all her life she’d been a conduit, it was fitting the end of her life would be with her innards exposed. She nestles her face into him and holds his arm. The pain grew -- unbearable, seething and seeping, like a scream -- and her vision began to blur. “I’m ready.”

Fragments barely keeping themselves together, Crosshair nods and kneels beside her. She takes the one hand she has left and caresses his face -- he’s warm, warmer than he’s ever been; hot with the holding of grief. “I love you,” she says and kisses him. He kisses her, and he feels if he kissed her hard enough, deeply enough -- long enough -- he could save her life essence, he could retain a part of her, keep her with him, safe and painless -- here, forever. “I love you,” he whispers as he pulls away, cradling her head in his hand; he’d never uttered such words before, and he’s never spoken them since. His thumb caresses her head as he presses his head to hers one more time; he can feel her nod beneath him.

His finger squeezes and her power switch is flicked off. The light fades from her eyes, and she goes limp in his arms.

He leans her against the tree and rests her there, hand in her lap, leg outstretched in front of her.

He sits beside her with one arm leaned against his knee. His face buried in his hand, he breaks apart completely.

Crosshair leaves Ada in a place he believed would comfort her for eternity -- he leaves her beneath the tree, overlooking the lake, flowers in her lap, blossoms behind her ear.

When he returns to his brothers, he does not speak. They ask him nothing.

Crosshair has never returned, but for dreams.

#tbb crosshair #bad batch #ct 9904 #clone trooper crosshair #the bad batch #crosshair fic #bad batch fic #tbb fic #*#'i'm never gonna write this fic i might as well write out the summary!!!!!!'#proceeds to write three thousand fucking words of a sUmMaRY #i am a 🤡#ada 565

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you-are-crazy-beautiful · 3 years

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Continuation of ask:

Favourite character and why?

I think, this will probably come as no surprise that my favourite character is Miss Kieu My Vu herself. Not only in Druck, she's my favourite character in the whole skamverse!

Yeah, so you know how I said I'd probably end up writing an essay about Kieu My at some point...you probably weren't prepared for this anon, because this is legit like a thesis 😬😆

I can't tell you how much I love Kieu My, honestly, after every clip with her, I would actually say it out loud.

I had my headcanons of what I thought she was going to be like based on S5 and her activity on IG (who she follows etc.). I thought she was probably a bit insecure, a nerd, and going to be a really soft LI. When she said 'Bro, what heart', I laughed because I knew she was going to be one of the greatest LI in Skamverse, and boy is she! So one reason she is my fave is because I literally watched the character that I had written in my head, come to life in front of me! ✨

It actually really hurts me and makes me sad knowing that a minority of people in the fandom are sending DM's to the writers saying Kieu My wasn't written well and underdeveloped because they want a Kieu My S7😰😡. They did such a stunning job with her and it pains me to think they might think they didn't.

Some people are saying that her background didn't get explored, but I would argue that it definitely did, we know she has a good, supportive relationship with her parents, that she cares about her Vietnamese heritage, that she feels insecure speaking Vietnamese as she's a 3rd generation immigrant, and her parent's didn't teach her it in great detail. She feels she owes her parents for giving up their dreams and all the hard work they do to make sure she has a good life, which I really relate to because that's how I feel with my mum, even though they don't expect anything back.

Also, you never get the whole background of a LI explored🤷‍♀️ I also argue that a detailed 'background' does not = development or a character getting fleshed out. For example, Maya in SkamFr got a really detailed background, which she explained to Lola in ep 3. I love Maya, so this is not a dig at her. Yet, besides from explaining why she ghosted Lola when she found out about her addiction problem, they didn't give her much more personality than 'the sunshine' to Lola's darkness, and imo she's quite 2D. Development is loads of things, it is a personality being exposed, insecurities being addressed, change in behaviour.

Even in just episode 1, Kieu My already goes through great development. In 5x10, she is still seen as the aloof Insta and quite superficial. Then in the first clip of 6x01, you can see how awkward she is (I cannot express how good Nhungi is with the little details). The way she doesn't understand Fatou's question about what she's doing and replies straight faced that she's walking on the pavement 😂 The stuttering when she asks to use the skateboard. The first hint of her insecurity when she says she bets Fatou never fell off. Which can I just say, I love that line! Because as if Fatou would be able to use a skateboard the first time she tried. It shows Kieu My's insecurity but also how she views Fatou as this cool and collected person. Then when Fatou says she did fall off and laughs, Kieu My lets out a nervous breath to herself. Then laughter is heard, and she starts looking around self-consciously. I think it's probably a mix of thinking people may be laughing at her putting herself out there and looking like an idiot on the skateboard, along with her inner biphobia.

Then the clip in the Physics class we saw the first on screen hints at nerd Kieu My. I went nuts that day as we also got the text between Zoe and her talking about the Bio test, and how Kieu My was studying for it despite the answers being leaked. Druck said Nerd-Kieu My rights!✌ I love that Physics clip so much because as soon as the teacher finishes the question, Kieu My has her hand raised to answer, but also note she doesn't make the hand high or easy to see, showing us she doesn't draw attention to it. So, already in ep 1 you have Superficial-Kieu My -> awkward, nerd Kieu My. DEVELOPMENT!

Please don't interact with this if that's your opinion that she isn't developed. You're entitled to your opinion, but I will not read or answer it.

One of the things I was pleasantly surprised with was that although I thought she was going to be soft and insecure, I thought she would try to hide it behind the Ice queen personality more, and fight her feelings.

It was probably during the NYE clip (which is also maybe why it's my no.1 clip 🥰) that I realised they weren't going to go down the route of her holding onto the 'cool girl' image. She was so shy and could hardly keep eye contact with Fatou when she was talking about her dream of studying Mars❤

I remember there was genuinely like 2 people other than me in the Kieu My fan club when she wasn't responding, and it was strange to me because she said in ep 2 that girls scare her and she doesn't know what to do. It didn't make sense for her to ghost Fatou for any other reason, as girl had spent 11hrs talking with Fatou a week before. The moment in ep 4 when Fatou talks to her in person and she's the shook Mr Krabbe meme 😂💀

She really spent the whole week reading Fatou's texts and then f*cked it up herself by trying to get Constantin off her back. Then my girl came through texting Fatou everyday Sun-Wed, until Fatou responded on Thursday. She really grabbed the bull by the horns and straight up asked Fatou on a date in the geekiest way possible. I'm sure she suggested the table tennis bar because Fatou did, so she thought 'this must be an appropriate first date venue' 😂. The last line on Thursday when she said she can't get Fatou out of her head 🥺 The amount of vulnerability, she's so brave 🤧

Volunteering to do the project with Fatou, again showing her bravery and not caring about what anybody else thought even with the rumour going around and Constantin sitting next to her!

Turning up with the plate of Vietnamese pancakes, and doing the nervous bounce she does. Revealing to Fatou that she doesn't think she's good enough, and everybody thinks she's perfect, and the pressure she puts on herself to live up to that. Crying when she thought she had blown her chance to be with Fatou. She's too soft I can't take it! 😭Even the detail that she always tries to hold Fatou's hand for comfort 🗣🗣

Getting her girl, and then immediately setting up a date. Laying herself bare about her inner biphobia, and Fatou being the first girl she's been with, her dreams of being an astrophysicist, and nerding out about the history of the universe 🥰

I absolutely love how she's the one to initiate the first kisses and touches, she just went in with both feet and never looked back, fighting her fears to be with Fatou. She is so brave! Which makes all her gestures of love even more immense! They would be incredibly romantic gesture anyway, I mean climbing a roof in her fancy clothes *swoon*, but the fact that she is doing it, despite being terrified🗣🗣

Being a straight A student, but not caring about the presentation and just Fatou's wellbeing. I burst into tears when she asked the teacher to stop and then argued back to him.

Showing how she finds it hurtful that no one really sees her and they only care about her looks. One of the things I was constantly blown away with was how Kieu My kept being given the space to speak. There's at least 3 key scenes where she is just allowed to breathe, and talk about her fears and issues, which I think is so rare.

How she is also an absolute 🤡 Referring to Fatou as Axolotlgirl in texts, sending Fatou songs and that she can't help think about Fatou while listening to them, but not knowing why and that she is in love. When she is too scared to talk to Fatou, but got her nails cut ASAP, and was liking all of Fatou's IG posts. Telling Fatou to stay away from her because she is so hurt but then having a full on breakdown for 2 weeks, calling people at 3am, and stalking Fatou's IG, accidentally liking posts, and thinking Fatou was moving on with Ava 🤡

Being such a caring person and going to help Constantin at 11pm, no questions asked, and keeping an eye on him at the party, making sure he was drinking water. Being there for Fatou because she knows something is going on, even though she's been hurt in their last interactions. Helping her parents at the store with no complaints, but fitting in time to print old Maths workbooks to help Fatou 🥰.

Getting a gold turtle and carrying it in her pocket because she was too scared to give it to Fatou! Setting up a stargazing date in someone's bedroom in the middle of someone else's birthday party 💀

Apologising to Ava because it's the right thing to do and not because she's with Fatou.

So, as you can gather, I think Kieu My is alright 😜

Thank you to the writers and Nhungi, because you really knocked it out the park with her!❤

#druck #kieu my vu

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p5youllneverseeitcoming · 3 years

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Persona 5 Strikers/Scramble

So! I finished the story of Persona 5 Strikers and I wanted to share my thoughts as I have soooo much to say but cannot share with my friends due to spoilers :’) I am currently playing on a New Game+ as, ya girl wants the Platinum Trophy :o

I will talk about some of the things that I really liked here (Spoiler free don’t worry) AND include spoilery things under the cut so I won’t ruin the experience for anyone else!

The Plot

Obviously this takes place after the original Persona 5 story finishes and as opposed to a whole year, you just get 1 month with the Phantom Thieves. I really liked exploring all the cities you travel to and the character interactions were so cute!! I really like the two new characters introduced (Sophia and Zenkichi Hasegawa). Both of them fit the story so well and their interactions with the other Thieves are honestly so good and pure! Also?? Their outfits? Amazing T_T It was such a nice change seeing everyone in casual outfits as opposed to their school uniforms!

I also loved the fact that you could choose to play with characters that get introduced late game like Haru for example straight away. I for one, always have her in my party as soon as she’s available so having her for the whole game was like a dream come true haha. I’ll talk about Sophia and Zenkichi a bit more under the cut but I will say that it’s so fun to play as them! I personally prefer Sophia more as she has healing skills which are always really useful and she uses yo-yo’s for her weapons which are so fun to use. Zenkichi uses a great sword which is very Final Fantasy of him and I am loving it. I love their Phantom Thief outfits! Sophia looks super cute in her floofy coat and boots and Zenkichi just looks so cool! His hat is goals, I want one T_T

The anime cutscenes in the game are also... Omg... I just can’t help but fangirl over how everyone looks... ESPECIALLY SOPHIA OML, she’s so... Bby... And of course, the dialogue options you can choose are so funny, then again what else can you expect from a game that had the option to say “you jelly?” to Ryuji.

I won’t spoil the main plot but this game works similarly to Persona 5 in the sense of, you still go into dungeons but these ones are a lot shorter and when you leave the dungeon, the days don’t actually move forward, only specific story points advance the days. So essentially if you wished, you can stay and grind for as long as you like!

The Gameplay

I won’t lie, as expected from a hack-and-slash it gets quite chaotic at first if you don’t fully know what’s going on but you get used to it pretty quickly! The game gives you tutorials whenever anything new appears and you get the hang of it pretty well by the first dungeon. You still only have 4 characters in your party and Akira must always be present but here you can actually run around as the other party members when the battles are over! Also? Morgana gets comical sound effects when he does things like jumping and running and I was LIVING for it.

The other thing that changed is, obviously it’s not turn based so if you were like me and wore the SP restoring accessories to get 7SP back each turn, you’re in for a last surprise! In this game you actually use your items quite a lot as there isn’t a limit to how much you can use as you access them mid battle by pausing. Later on you get specific skills that restore your SP after each battle or by performing All Out Attacks and 1 More’s so honestly, SP isn’t really a problem for regular battles. I mainly found it running out quickly when I was fighting some of the optional bosses but I always had SP restoring items so it was all good hehe.

You still do things like All Out Attacks and 1 More’s in this game but you also do something called ‘Showtime’ which is very similar to the ones introduced in Royal only in Strikers it’s for one character, you basically build up the showtime gauge as you battle enemies and, once activated, you deal significant damage to stronger enemies like bosses as well as all of the enemies in the area. The All Out Attacks also have their own little animation with your party posing and just looking really good!

Yusuke being so extra is honestly such a mood omg... Also Mona T_T So smol.

Every party member has their own special quirks such as Ann and Makoto applying Fire and Nuclear affinity respectively to their regular weapons, Morgana turning into the Mona car and so on. I personally always had Haru and Yusuke in my party and kept switching between the other Thieves to see what I like best. Personally, I really like having Morgana or Sophia as they’re really good healers, Morgana obviously having the more powerful skills such as Mediaharan and Salvation.

Also... The menus... Omg... If you thought the Persona 5 menu was stylish then you will LOVE the Strikers menus. They’re so stylish! And I love that all the Phantom Thieves are there too, it’s so cute T_T

The only thing I don’t like is the game doesn’t pause when your controller dies so uh... I may or may not have died during a boss battle when I was like 2 hits away from winning and then just... Stopped moving letting the boss hit me with a killing combo :)

To be honest though the party that I had pretty much all the time was:

But as I said, I liked to change Morgana and Sophia around every now and then.

The Music

Omg the music. Atlus really just said: Hey what if we made Persona 5 music again but like... More epic?

The song that plays right as soon as you have control of Joker is SO. GOOD. I legit had to pause for like 5 mins just to jam out. I don’t think it will come as much of a surprise but in my opinion, Persona 5 definitely has one of the best video game soundtracks, I absolutely love all the songs!

I will discuss some of the dungeon themes in the spoilers but I absolutely love the soundtrack for this game. Every dungeon theme is so fitting for said dungeon, I genuinely listen to them all the time, especially when doing my research for my essays!

The battle music is really energetic as opposed to the jazzy feel from the original Persona 5 soundtrack but it’s very fitting for the actual battle as you often fly all around the area instead of standing in one spot. I will say, Last Surprise made an excellent comeback despite being an already amazing song which is just, amazing, incredible, fantastic...

Other things

Well, I can’t go into detail due to spoilers but they deadass put a JoJo reference as well as a character in the game :’) The moment I saw them I was fangirling so hard!!! Also? The villain designs in this game??? Amazing. Beautiful. Very creative!

The Phantom Thieves interacting with each other is also really cute! I ESPECIALLY liked the fact that Morgana and Ryuji got along a lot better! They still had small fights here and there but they pretty much apologised to one another straight away which I really liked! Also? Ryuji protecting his friends, especially the girls? Amazing. Wonderful. Cannot help but stan.

Well, that concludes the non-spoiler section which.... Is kinda long haha, Below the cut I will talk about the spoilery things so I advise looking at it AFTER you finish the game!

The Plot

The plot of this game is really fun if you ask me. You travel around Japan defeating Monarchs in Jails AND you get to experience the joys of summer vacation with your friends and your new Persona dad. I really like the fact that you don’t advance time when you leave the Jails because this gives you the chance to grind as much as you want before tackling harder fights like some of the optional bosses. The boss designs themselves were so good! Especially Alice?! My God? She’s beautiful?? Look at her!

Persona 5 Strikers said you can be horny on main... Just this once o_o. She literally steps on Joker in the Jail which o_o Ma’am... Plz but she ALSO steps on her manager in the real world.

I really liked all the bosses in this game because they felt so... Real? Obviously I don’t agree with them for brainwashing people into worshipping them, but I really like how the game gave them backstories that showed why they strayed away from the right path. The fact that the Thieves tell them that they understand their struggles because they themselves went through the same thing (Like Ann and Yusuke) honestly made me appreciate the story that much more. I really liked Haru’s little arc in Sapporo because not only did she help Mariko Hyodo and show her that despite mistakes you can always stand up and start again, but she also got to have more screentime, like that cute fountain scene she has with Akira! ALSO? The Hee-Horde?! I was laughing for a solid 5 minutes when I saw it! It was so cute how Haru, Sophia, Ryuji and Yusuke were so into it while Futaba was just there like: ????

I think my favourite Jail out of all of them will definitely have to be the Kyoto one, a.k.a. the Jail controlled by Zenkichi’s daughter, Akane. Despite how short it is, you can learn so much about her. The overall aesthetic of the jail shows her love to the Phantom Thieves and in the actual Jail theme you can hear fragments of ‘Life Will Change’ and ‘Wake Up, Get Up, Get Out There’ which I think is absolutely amazing! The boss fight for this jail honestly took me 3 tries to beat as the first time, I died due to not fully getting how Shadow Joker worked, and the second time, I was about 2 hits from beating him but then... My controller died :’) By the time it turned back on I was already c-c-c-c-comboed to death so :’) This is also the jail where Zenkichi awakens to his Persona and honestly? I found the little segment where he has to sneak around in his usual everyday attire so cute, bless him, he really did adopt 7 teenagers, their cat and an AI daughter.

ALSO?! They deadass put Dio in this game? Like when I first saw Natsume’s shadow I was like: Hm looks kinda familiar...

BUT THEN?!

Needless to say I was fangirling pretty hard.

I liked Akira Konoe, very much vibing with his Power Ranger aesthetic however, I have to say, his boss fights was surprisingly... Easy? At least it felt easy to me which was kind of... Disappointing I suppose for him supposedly being “the final boss” HOWEVER, I very much liked how his calling card was delivered, and the fact that Zenkichi could finally get his revenge was very satisfying!

Now, let’s talk about the end game, mainly the Abyss Jail. I did NOT see it coming (haha) that it was Ichinose all along! As I’m currently replaying the game, the fact that she doesn’t want to look at Sophia despite specialising in AI technology should have been my first clue that something is not quite right here!

When she forces Sophia to attack the Thieves, it honestly broke my heart. The fact that she recognised Joker and Skull... And she threw herself off the ledge just so she can’t hurt them anymore... Yo, I love her so much T_T That’s why her awakening to her Persona (her true Persona) was such a satisfying scene! Her Persona (Pandora) has a really cool design, I especially like the fact that she represents the Hope Arcana (as there was hope left at the bottom of Pandora’s box) and that Pandora herself kept the box-y design from her original “Persona” Pithos. I found it quite funny that all the skills Pithos has ended with a “?”. Anyway, the scene where she tells Ichinose all the things she learnt, and that Ichinose herself has a heart despite believing that she doesn’t for so long was so touching. It showed that Sophia deeply cares for her, despite the fact that she literally said she’s the reason so many people are getting mind controlled by EMMA. The ending scene with the two of them laughing and holding hands... My heart T_T

Now then, let’s talk about EMMA.

I. Loved. The. Final. Boss. Fight.

The fact that the game makes you use ALL the characters for the final fight! As I usually switched out characters here and there, my reserve party members weren’t severely under-levelled which made the fight pretty okay! I had quite... Strange groups I would say as I had Makoto and Zenkichi being a team, Morgana, Ann and Ryuji being a team, and Akira, Haru, Yusuke and Sophia being the final team. The final boss itself, has an absolutely beautiful design. I especially loved the angel like wings because it really showed that EMMA saw herself as a saviour. The cutscene that plays after with all the Thieves dealing the final blows before watching all the desires fall around them was honestly so pretty... Man, this game series is just so aesthetic!

When the credits rolled and all the photos started appearing I couldn’t help but start crying. It really felt like you were actually there, living through all the memories and the fact that Sophia called the photo of all of them together “Treasure”... T_T

The Gameplay

I already pretty much said all I wanted for the gameplay in the non-spoiler section but I will say, the Showtimes and the Master Skills each character learns are so good! I love that once you master all of them you’re bascially unstoppable, I especially love Haru’s and Akira’s as it allows them to deal damage even if they’re a safe distance away from the enemy. The fact that you can learn Bond skills that restore SP with every All Out Attack and One More is honestly so helpful because it saves you going back and forth between the real world but then again, by this point you probably have way too many HP and SP restoring items!

I really liked that Zenkichi has no weaknesses and uses Almighty damage but I find the whole Fury/HP consumption combination a bit weird. After a while you get used to it and obviously you don’t have to activate fury at all but as I said before, I prefer playing as Sophia. Although, I will say that gun wise, I think Zenkichi’s are a lot more fun to use than Sophia’s blasters, but then again that’s just my personal opinion!

The Music

As I said, the music was so fitting for each Jail, I absolutely love it.

The first Jail, you honestly can’t help but bop your head to the beat. It really gives you the impression that you’re in some kind of twisted theme park which really fit the overall aesthetic of the Jail. I loved the vibrant neon colour scheme in such a dark looking place.

The Okinawa Jail... My God that theme was so good. I can’t really explain it but the song really made you feel like you were... Alone, like the place was truly abandoned and forgotten. As soon as the violin started playing I couldn’t help but just stop and listen to it. The overall jail was just so... Creepy. The Shadows there resemebled the shadows you would usually find in the previous Persona games, just this black mass slithering around. I think it was very fitting that they put the Reaper in this Jail.

As I mentioned before, the Kyoto Jail theme is my absolute favourite. The fact that it has elements of other Persona 5 songs due to Akane being a big Phantom Thieves fan was such a good choice! I love how when you take a closer look, you can see the Phantom Thieves logo on the lanterns and the fact that Shadow Akane herself made a Phantom Thief outfit for herself... Big mood. I loved how all the Thieves encouraged her to try and get along with her dad better AND that they taught Zenkichi how to cook just so he can make curry for her, especially when you remember just how much curry means to someone like Futaba.

I really liked the remix of Rivers in a Desert, then again what did I expect from a Persona game? The battle music is ALWAYS amazing. I really liked how this played when you fight Konoe as it parallels when you fight Shido in the original, supposedly the final fight, only to find out that there is something MUCH bigger than them.

Other things

This post is already way too long and if you read all of this... Thank you so much. Sadly, I cannot share this with any of my friends as it’s spoilers so I hope you guys don’t mind me sharing this here! I would love to see your opinion of this game!!!

Also? Yusuke and Akira are now canonically dating and I think that’s beautiful

And then that scene later on

Why do you think we came here with Yusuke, Morgana?

TL;DR: I love this game

#p5s #persona 5 #p5 #persona 5 strikers #persona 5 scramble #p5s spoilers #persona 5 scramble spoilers #persona 5 strikers spoilers

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borisbubbles · 3 years

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ESC2021 Preshow: 20. Estonia

Uku Suviste - “The lucky one”

Semi 2, #02

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Going through the motions of 2021′s shitty NF season, it was a given that the critical mass of the “2020 returnees” competing the selections in these would win them hands down.

So given how much i DISLIKED the offensively boring abomination “What love is”, and how PAINFULLY inevitable Uku’s victory in a decent Eesti Laul (um spoiler for NF corner?) seemed to be, It’s actually a shock I ended up liking Uku? But I do, lol and I’m not apologizing, sorry boos.

In fact, I was rooting for Uku to win EL as soon as I saw his performance in the semi. “The lucky one”, which suffered from Aggressive Autotune + Forgettable Melody (we need a name for this. I propose Roxen Syndrome?), is legit good live and harps back to the (admittedly better) “Pretty Little Liar”, and that’s good enough for me.

Of course, I am aware of the obvious ~*SOULLESS HIMBOT FROM THE DREAM FACTORY*~ label attached to this this entry (written by Uku and something called “Sharon Vaughn” are we certain this person isn’t just Kontopoulos in drag?), don’t worry. I rank him twentieth, not seventh.

Fortunately, Uku is a mandroid from the SAME sweatshop that gave us Lucie Jones a few years back - in other words omfg he’s barely functional. 😍 Droning robot turned incompetent DRAMA KING <333333 The amount of EFFORT that needs to be thrown in to keep a ~pretence of competence~ is the most tangible in the backing vocals, which trail Uku’s like a shadow and STILL his voicecracks come through at key intervals <3

😍😍😍😍😍

The pathos of Uku throwing in high votes he cannot sing and then his voice breaking over the strain each time, gets me, okay? He doesn’t need a crystal ball to show me, baby it’s clear that you don’t know him :SOB:. So dramatic, so inept, so unintetionally comedic, so Uku <3

In other news, this lockdown had better end soon because with each passing day I feel like I’m turning further into a cat lady.

ps: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYXNeYXUmEQ&loop=0 😍😍😍

NF Corner - Eesti Laul 2021

Finally a decent Eesti Laul, lol. I wish I could say it was good, but it had one of the weirdest semi split’s I’ve ever seen. EL’s first Semi was without exaggeration the WORST show in the entire season, and the second was a contender for the BEST one across all NFs???? I suppose EXTREME Evil and EXTREME Good balance each other out in blistering adequacy?

Anyway, I’ll now proceed to ignore Koit and Egert and Karl Killing and Hans and all the other bad (non-Linna/non-Kéa) entries from semi 1, and proceed to an NF Corner composed ENTIRELY of semi 2 songs :-)

Jüri Pootsmann - “Magus Melanhoolia”

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It was between Sissi and Jüri for the Token Superfinalist Contender slot on this list, and Jüri is infinitely more notable. Sorry, Sis ur time (to win Eesti Laul?) will come once you figure out to write good music :(

Anyway, what can I even say about Jüri because lmfao what a baffling entry. Registered BARITONE JÜRI POOTSMANN coming back with a an experimental lounge jazz song that is song almost entirely in falsetto. 😍 The camera angles <3 the fact that this already INCREDEBLY short song includes 10 seconds of Jüri standing on the stage looking bored <3 what a fucking baffling entry, I have no opinions, only exclamations of surprise.

REDEL - “Tarttu”

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I HAAAATED “Tarttu” on first listen. 😂😂😂😂 but seriously though, this is downright epic. The UNPLUGGED Meiekündimees MADNESS of it all, now condenced into a equally nonsensical song that is basically like “X is a wooden town but NONE OF THEM ARE AS WOODEN TOWNY AS TARTTU. *incoherent kazoo noises*” 😍😍😍 Once got the chorus stuck in my head at the zoo as I was watching the penguins getting fed and it was one of the most bizarre synesthesic experiences I’ve ever had lmfao <3

Gram-of-Fun - “Lost in a dance”

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If you’re wondering what the sort of music I listen to Eurovision is like - this is it. INCREDIBLY good and addictive and EMOTIONALLY tangible 80s New Wave is my fucking jam, can we have entries like this in EVERY selection from here on out? WELL DONE Kristel... on composing this wonderful song, less so on the Kazka-esque vocals that caused it to tragically NQ in the semi. 🙄 Still, BRING THEM BACK (and restrict Kristel to a songwriter only role, plz.)

Gram-of-Fun were my fave, but because they NQ’d somebody else had to fill their shoes in the finale. I’ll now reveal who it was

Kadri Voorand - “Energy”

youtube

IT WAS HARD DECIDING BETWEEN SUURED TÜDRÜKUD AND KADRI THOUGH. But given that Charlotte Perelli is guaranteed to appear in Sweden’s NF corner (um is she? :counts on fingers: Clara, Evas, Dotter... ehh sure I’m committed now I guess), it would be best NOT to post Dagmar & Kaire as they fucking clown her lol <3 But their song WAS pretty antiquated schlager...

Kadri otoh... absolutely breaks all records for me by delivering a unicorn: an entertaining stripped-down piano ballad. For the most part because she has incredible emotional delivery that serves personality on a fucking pyrotechnical level, like onn-stop “Loudmouthed Oaf Energy” in the form of a introspective jazz ballad <3 Can you imagine Estonia actually picking this? They could have come left-handside.

But will Uku do well? :o

Predicted Journey - Estonia

He won’t come top 10, if that’s what you mean by “well”.😂 If you mean “qualify for the Grand Final” then... potentially? Semi 2 is less of a crapshoot than the first semifinal however. At this stage, it’s pretty much “okay, so these twelve acts can qualify... but which ten will?”.

Fortunately for Uku, he is one of aforementionned twelve possible qualifiers. (the others are: san marino, czech rep, greece, moldova, iceland, serbia, albania, bulgaria, finland, switzerland and denmark). UNfortunately for Uku, he’s one of the candidates for the two NQ slots inside that group of twelve.

The problem with Estonia is that their entry is a televote-friendly ballad, stuck in a really televote-UNfriendly slot (#02), in a semi where the jury vote will very likely put them outside the top 10. If we add in a dark stage and Uku’s shaky vocals, they don’t look particularly secure.

However, I also think Estonia can qualify relatively easily because “televote-friendly ballad” is a unique niche inside that semi; the other ballads (Switzerland is NOT a ballad), won’t be getting many votes and Uku’s appeal as a handsome man with a dramatic song will make him stand out in spite of his spot in the running order, as LONG AS his vocal delivery (or that of the prerecorded backing vocals) remains adequate enough. If not, he’ll be swiftly forgotten and NQ.

Another thing that can cause Uku to qualify is if at least two others of the twelve underwhelm (my money for that would be on Albania, Denmark, San Marino and/or Czech Rep), making Uku the lucky one as he’ll ascend in the ensuing powercreep.

At any rate, it’s really difficult to gauge how well Uku would do since I haven’t really thought about the other BL qualifiers’ odds enough. His televote should be strong enough to avoid bottom 3, I think, and I think it’s safe to say he won’t come top five. Between those values, pffffew, who can possibly tell? I’m not burning my fingers on that.

Projected placements > Qualifier Tier: Borderline > Semifinal: 6th-14th (out of 17) > Grand Final: 17th-22nd (out of 26)

THE RANKING

01. 02. 03. 04. 05. 06. 07. 08. 09. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. ESTONIA - Uku Suviste - “The lucky one” 21. FINLAND - Blind Channel - “Dark side” 22. AZERBAIJAN - Efendi - “Mata Hari” 23. the NETHERLANDS - Jeangu Macrooy - “Birth of a new age” 24. CZECH REPUBLIC - Benny Christo - “Omaga” 25. DENMARK - Fyr og Flamme - “Øve os på hinanden” 26. SLOVENIA - Ana Soklič - “Amen” 27. SWITZERLAND - Gjon’s Tears - “Tout l’Univers” 28. ROMANIA - Roxen - “Amnesia” 29. SERBIA - Huricane - “Loco loco” 30. POLAND - Rafał - “The ride” 31. ISRAEL - Eden Alene - “Set me free” 32. GEORGIA - Tornike Kipiani - “You” 33. PORTUGAL - The Black Mamba - “Love is on my side” 34. SPAIN - Blas Cantó - “Voy a quedarme” 35. NORWAY - Tix - “Fallen Angel” 36. CYPRUS - Elena Tsagrinou - “El Diablo” 37. AUSTRIA - Vincent Bueno - “Amen” 38. NORTH MACEDONIA - Vasil - “Here I stand” 39. GERMANY - Jendrik - “I don’t feel hate”

#Eurovision #Eurovision 2021 #ESC2021 #ESC 2021 #Eurovision Song Contest #Estonia #Uku Suviste #The Lucky One

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