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#the rest emotionally devastated me
miceenscene · 1 year
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making memes at work to fight thru the pain of NOT BEING ABLE TO FUCKING FINISH THIS GD BOOK
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turtleblogatlast · 5 months
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Imagine little Leo having trouble sleeping so he ends up watching tv and movies with Splinter to pass the time. Splinter often just passes out in his chair, but Leo likes the company anyway.
One day, Leo’s rifling through the movies his dad brought back for them (usually 70s and 80s stuff - Splinter has a bias) and he gasps.
Leo runs over to Splinter and holds up a copy of The Last Unicorn, begging that they watch it that night.
Splinter remembers absolutely nothing about the movie, but hey it’s got a unicorn and it’s animated so it’s gotta be fine, right? So he turns the movie on and passes out near immediately.
He’s woken up roughly an hour and a half later by Leo climbing up onto his chair and sobbing hysterically into his chest.
The movie is now one of Leo’s favorites.
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mythology-void · 3 months
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thinking about the parallels between hermes thinking he's a terrible father and sally jackson thinking she's a terrible mother only Sally had Poseidon to talk to and Hermes only had May, his beautiful fragile mortal wife who went insane because he wasn't strong enough to keep her safe
oh God i can't do this someone hold me
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fairyroses · 7 months
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did you watch the Shattered/Asylum Talkville episodes? 👀
Yes I did! I'm really sorry, I've been meaning to send you all my notes/highlights from the Shattered pod ep like I promised I would, but my last semester of grad school started like 2.5 weeks ago and I've just been massively overwhelmed since then. 😭
Tbh, you could probably watch the full Shattered pod if you wanted, it was a pretty good ep for Talkville standards. The biggest highlight was probably Michael saying that the moment where Lex sees Clark use his powers for the first time is his favorite Lex moment in the series (especially in terms of his own performance)—he's clearly really proud of this episode and I think that made the pod better in general. Also Lionel gets called an evil bastard a couple of times, Tom points out how we all feel bad for Lex by the end of the episode, and Al Gough calls the Clex relationship "the focal point of the series." Other stuff happens too ofc, but I'd say those were my top moments.
The Asylum pod was... less good, IMO—like, it wasn't bad I guess, but some stuff def left me feeling kinda frustrated, so I wouldn't really recommend that you watch that one askldfsk (I could probably skim through it again and collect some highlights from it if you want, though)
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quietwingsinthesky · 2 months
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to be transparent, my ideal pokemon game would easily give up the larger roster for a more interactive experience with the pokemon we keep. stuff like having them follow you/be rideable or pokemon amie where you can pet them? that’s as important to me as the battling, honestly. you’re here to build a bond with these little guys!!
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The emotional whiplash going from theories and fun, to watching Quackity destroy his baby’s funeral bed like WHAT WAS THE REASONNNNNNN
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vulpinesaint · 1 year
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like third night in a row where i've sat down intending to write smth for my new little fantasy wip and then looked up at the clock and realized i Need to go to bed or i'll die at work in the morning. i started getting ready to sit down and write at 9 pm. it's now 10:30. i don't remember fucking Anything in between literally where does the time go
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mcwexlerscigarette · 2 years
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CRAZY HOT DIVORCE REUNION SEX ON MONDAY WOOOOOOOOOOOOO (the crowd goes apeshit)
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dekariosclan · 6 months
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Dust in his eye
So in Gale’s romance, if Tav chooses the dialogue option to end the relationship, part of Gale’s heartbreaking response is this line as he visibly tears up and walks away: “You’ve actually caught me at an inopportune time. Blasted…dust in my eye. Excuse me…”
…which makes it even more heartbreaking, because it’s such an obvious lie. He’s trying to save face because he’s devastated and embarrassed, and that’s the best excuse he can come up with in the moment.
Even though Gale is one of the most emotionally open and honest characters when it comes to his feelings for Tav—sometimes going so far as to be EXCESSIVELY honest—his embarrassment and his sense of decorum make crying in front of Tav a step too far for him, so he hastily makes an excuse and hurries away.
But putting that scene aside (because I truly cannot fathom how anyone’s heart could handle breaking up with Gale), it actually got me thinking about him getting teary from happiness instead, and again, due to his sense of pride/decorum/what-have-you, trying to cover it up by saying he’s got ‘dust in his eye’—no matter how ridiculous that statement is.
And you just know that he’s the type to get teary/choked up when he’s happy. The man is so damn passionate and he loves Tav SO much. Once he and Tav are together in Waterdeep, with the weight of the world lifted from both of their shoulders, you cannot tell me his eyes won’t be wet half the time.
Just picture:
Gale and Tav strolling through Waterdeep for the first time together, arms linked, Gale gazing at Tav’s beloved face. For a moment he’s so overwhelmed he noticeably tears up: “Forgive me, love. Just some dust in my eye.” (…as they walk through the rain, with everything around them soaking wet.)
Gale cooking, giving Tav the dinner date he’d promised. He’s watching from the kitchen as Tav and Tara are talking and getting along swimmingly. Tav looks up with a smile and meets his blurry gaze, and he hastily turns away to dab at his eyes with his apron: “Apologies, I seem to have gotten dust in my eye…” (…as he stands in a kitchen full of steam.)
Tav held fast in Gale’s arms, head resting on the wizard’s chest, fully relaxed, slowly drifting in and out of sleep. Gale’s reverently running his fingers through Tav’s hair, over their face, and along the scars picked up from their many battles. When Tav suddenly wakes, blinking as they try to focus on Gale’s face, he quickly swipes the back of his hand over his eyes: “A moment, love—dust in my eye…” (…as they are both soaking in the bath.)
Gale and Tav clasping hands as the cleric’s speech gets close to the point in the ceremony where they will officially be wed. Gale’s managed to hold it together through his lengthy (and very descriptive) vows, but now he’s got tears not just glistening in his eyes, but actively brimming and spilling over; his lower lip is trembling. Tav smiles, squeezing his hands, leaning in close. “I know it’s just dust in your eye,” Tav whispers lovingly, wanting to spare him any embarrassment. (…and for once, given their location, it IS possible.) But Gale shakes his head. “No,” he murmurs, gazing joyfully at Tav through his completely blurred vision. “Not this time.”
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merlinssassybeard · 11 months
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'Ex' Husband Gojo
Tags- fem reader x Gojo, swearing, angst.
Synopsis: The reader had a miscarriage and her husband wasn't there with her to give her support and now she's mentally shaken. Y/n decides to divorce him and but things take a way different turn...
Gojo and reader are married for 4 yrs and love each other profoundly but a terrible accident happened with reader and caused reader a miscarriage and was going through a very bad time. Reader wanted Gojo there to help mentally and emotionally but he was busy with curses...
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"Satoru", you began with a shaky voice.
Your husband Satoru Gojo had all your attention the moment you said his name.
You had called up Satoru to the Tokyo estate, your marital home, for 'an important emergency talk'. These words were enough for Gojo to run from his busy packed schedules to run home to check up on you.
"Hmm?", Satoru hummed indicating you he's all ears. Both seated opposite to each other in the kitchen.
"Satoru, i-", you hesitated but continued, " Satoru, i want divorce...."
At first, he was unresponsive, still processing whether the words he heard were real or some weak residual cursed technique from cursed spirits left on him considering he came right after finishing a mission.
"Divorce?" Satoru came to his senses, "is this... some sort of.. joke my love MRS y/n? Cus' I'm really not liking it!", he tried to laugh it off.
But this wasn't a joke.
Not for you.
You're done.
Done giving him all of everything you have and receiving none.
You had your head slightly bowed down, unable to summon the energy, the strength to look right into his eyes. "This is not a joke, Satoru Gojo.", "i cannot live like this anymore".
Satoru knew it was indeed serious by the tone of it so he's demeanor changed as well.
"Why is it so y/n?", he mumbled in his soft husky voice while extending his hand towards yours to hold. "Is it something i did? You know you can tell me. I told you beforehand marrying me wasn't going to be easy, you remember?"
Yes he is right. He did told you a bazillion times when you nagged him for marriage anytime and everytime you saw him breathing around you. He had told you enough times that being his wife and also in a conservative society isn't going to be a cakewalk. 'Once married, there is no way out of the marital bond since its a holy bond, blessed by the heavens themselves' or as they said, but you didn't care, at that time.
"Reasons don't matter.", you flinched your hands away from his approach and passed the envelope with the papers and got up. "You'll find my signatures in there. Please be civil. Don't want any drama."
Satoru didn't knew what to say since he didn't even expected such a devastating and mind boggling news either. He had just finished his mission overseas and had taken only an hour of rest before being assigned another 'clean up' duty (messed/botched mission by another sorcerer) and in the middle of it he gets your call for an emergency meet up at the house.
He has been working all around the clock and came home to see you, hoping to receive kisses or you expecting souvenirs, which he had plenty just for you. But instead he got this ..... a farewell?
Gojo stayed seated there, watching you leave the kitchen to the room. He stayed seated there for a moment wondering what did he do, where did he go wrong, did he go wrong? Are you alright? Is this a cry for help? Is everything okay with you?
He wanted to check up on you so he got up to head towards the bedroom where you were but stopped dead in his tracks when it hit him, the reason....
"Y/n", you heard the door slide open and Gojo calling your name.
He opened the door and saw you were.... packing? God, you're really not joking.
"Yes?", you gathered the strength to look up at him for the first time in months! Due to his 'business trips' and you swear to god you would have fell down crying as your knees went weak.
"Is it...", he stumbled to say further but he knew he had to confront you with this, "is it because of that thing we talked about? On the phone?"
You knew you will burst out crying in front of him if he talked any further and because of that you couldn't speak either, holding tight onto lips to avoid the tears.
"Uh huh mmmhh mmmhh" you nodded and tried to avoid eye contact.
Oh no! Satoru knew he messed up. But he couldn't just let you... leave!? How could he? He knows and you too, that you are the only person who makes him vulnerable to the point he acts like child, only with you. You are the only one who actually makes him happy and content with his life in this miserable shite world. No words describe your and his relationship. So just how could he just let you leave?
"Y/n. I get it. You want kids." He mumbles, "then we'll have kids! Okay?" He declared.
You looked at him, and when he said that he looked as if he's been held under gun point, reluctant, yet... determined?
No! Yes, you do want children but the role of a father cannot be forced upon a man! That way the child will only be a 'burden' rather than a child born out of love and acceptance.
"No need." You announced and turned your back to him and started putting your clothes in the bag. "My mind can't be changed"
Gojo was left puzzled. He is ready to give you what you had been asking the day you both got married, what his and your parents wanted and the entirety of the Jujutsu Society had a keen eye on.
"I can't let you leave y/n like this", he said not knowing what to do either.
"Okay, I'll put on some fresh clothes.", you replied unbothered.
"No y/n i I told you once you're married you can't!", Satoru tried to come up with some reasoning.
"How the FUCK i cannot?" You yelled right onto his face, throwing the dress in your hand on the floor, annoyed at everything and anything.
"You just CAN'T!", Satoru tried to hold his sanity together.
"I AM FUCKING LEAVING! Divorce or NOT!", You snapped at him and went to pick the dress up and put it in the bag.
"Listen y/n, we can't go with divorce, it'll cause a lot of talk in the family and there's more but we just can't...", he tried to reason with you calmly but you were not in the mood.
"Why do you suddenly want me in your life when from the past fucking 4 years all you have done is being out on your trips?" You sneered and mocked, "Announcing we're going to have kids! Wow! That's not how it works Satoru!"
Satoru now lost it.
"Then what IS IT YOU WANT!? Haven't i given enough? You wanted this marriage! Not me! But i went for it because it was you! Went against my family for you and kept you away from them but what do you care" (your in-laws are toxic and would love to dance over your grave)
"Thats because i refuse to be your whore! You called me up whenever you felt like it. Might as well be your wife rather than just be some whore you sleep with on friday nights."
You recognized what you just babbled out and its disgusting. Your hands involuntarily moved and covered your mouth. You couldn't ever fathom the words you puked.
It is NOT like that! Not at all! You love Satoru, you Have been for a long time! And to have him as your husband is a dream come true! But how could say such lowly things.
Satoru just stood there. It was like one explosion after the other. So that is it? You came to him... for looks? For money? For sex? Goddammit! Satoru wanted to laugh because women of his family warned him not to marry some average human girl, saying further that you'll rob him of his money one day. But he didn't and just stood there watching the horror in your eyes unfold.
Satoru saw you as the only person in his life that made him actually understand the definition of love. Especially someone human, a non sorcerer like you. Thought of you made him content and calm, knowing he has someone waiting for him...... but not anymore.
He rubbed his temple as he'd been without an eye covering this whole time and his head ached a little with all this drama unfolding. He smiled through and looked at you, "that's what you think of me y/n?"
"No-no Satoru! Thats not what meant! Ugh! I don't want the divorce anymore!-"
He interrupted, "ah its okay, totally okay. I'll sign em."
Gojo was awfully calm and collected and you knew that when he's like this he would explode like a volcano if irked.
"No i will not let you!" You screamed and pushed him and ran out of the room in a frenzy to retrieve the divorce papers and tore the sections with your signature into tiny unrecognizable trash.
Satoru walked into the kitchen and just stood there. "You can have this house. I'll have Ijichi send down some papers later."
You eyes widened, "what..... papers?"
"Separation papers", he replied.
His gaze went around the house randomly and said, "since you don't wanna be a-" he stop and looks at you but continues.
"Since you do not wish to be a 'whore', you're free from me. I don't want chaos in both of our families so im suggesting separation. Yeah? Works in favor of both of us"
You were shook. You knew what you were doing when you brought the divorce papers but you didn't expected it to become so real.
"I'm leaving now. I'll send for my things so please don't throw my things just yet! Haha." Satoru was throwing jokes at a moment like this.
Damage has been done.
You ran out as soon as you saw him leave. You kept saying that its not what you meant and there's more to it and what not. But he just wore his blindfold and got into the car.
You saw him shut the door on your face and uttered his last words as your husband to you....
"Congratulations, Ms y/n. This'll be the last time you'll see me and when you think you're ready for divorce, lemme know!"
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Part 2
Series masterlist
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dailyadventureprompts · 4 months
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Homebrew Mechanic: Battles of Attrition
I think we can all agree that there’s something a little wonky with how d&d’s combat system changes between the early and mid/late game. Heroes go from being rightfully cautious about danger to being outright banal about it, confident that their accumulated power will be enough to dispatch all but the most outstanding foes.  The traditional solution is to put them up against stronger enemies but in my experience these mismatched encounters are a failing proposition: combat just gets more swingy and there’s only so many high level threats I can throw at them in a short period of time before it begins to strain credulity.   
While a lot of folks (Especially the OSR crowd) have taken the stance that 5e is broken because of how much it empowers players, I think the real fault lays with the lack of systems that exist to provide challenge outside of anything related to the damage based tug-of-war that is combat.  I think a lot of those systems were part of the non existent “exploration” pillar of the game before Hasbro realized they could make easy money selling the game in its unfinished state and gutted it along with the development team. 
Thankfully, I and other homebrewers are around to do what the megacorporations cant, namely have some original thoughts and try and figure out a way to add challenge back to the game without resenting those playing it for having fun. 
TLDR:  Trying to make our games challenging by upping damage numbers in combat is a losing proposition, in no small part because that part of the game is DESIGNED around the heroes winning. Instead, we up the overall difficulty by making them temporarily weaker with systems like sickness, stress, exhaustion, & item degradation. All of which I have details and guidelines on below the cut. 
First and foremost let me state some of my goals for these “attrition systems”, so we can all be on the same page. Whenever I make homebrew rules I try for something that’s going to require little to no paperwork on behalf of the players and can be seamlessly implemented into my DMing style. It’s not about realism, it’s not about punishing players, this is a way for me to add mechanical depth without bogging down the machine entirely. 
Attrition should be largely non-permanent.  The 5e audience invests a lot in their characters both emotionally and mechanically, so it won’t do to pile on debilitating debuff after debuff to the point of making a character useless. 
There should be an inverse relationship between the severity of the affliction and how long it lasts. Think in term of encounters, days, or weeks, (with the understanding that an attrition that goes on for long enough becomes a questhook in itself) 
The exception to this rule is if someone hits 0 hitpoints. I’m outspoken in my stance that characters should only die when it’s alternatively appropriate, but the dm is at liberty to inflict thematically devastating setbacks in the unlikely event that the party DOES suffer losses in the damage tug of war. 
We want to be sparing with how much attrition we throw at the party at once, so as to not create a “death spiral” where failures compound upon one another and make getting through the adventure impossible. 
In most cases suffering Attrition should be something the party is able to avoid by being fast/lucky/cautious/clever or whatever else the encounter requires. It’s there to add weight and consequence to their actions, and as a factor for DMs to build scenarios around. 
Exhaustion:  Unlike a lot of the other changes made in Oned&d, I actually quite like the overhaul of “each point of exhaustion is a cumulative -1 to all d20 rolls and spell dc, beyond 10 is death” as it allows us to play with exhaustion far more readily as an attrition. 
Every night you don’t rest in a haven (a safe comfortable place)  you need to make a con save or take a point of exhaustion, with the ruggedness of the environment determining the DC. Characters with the survival skill or natural explorer feat don’t have to make this roll. Only rest in a haven removes exhaustion at the rate of one point per night (though spaces like a luxury inn or a peaceful glade watched over by friendly fey may restore more)  
Hitting 0 hp and then being healed gives you a point of exhaustion. Nothing’s going to tire you out like getting magically defibulated so now everyone can stop complaining about healing word spam. 
Poison:  For our purposes, the “poisoned” condition as written  is too severe. Disadvantage on all attacks and ability checks is downright punishing for anything other than a single battle. Instead we’re going to make it work like charmed, where there’s a baseline effect for the purposes of resistance, but the status of each poison is dependant on the source.  
Poison falls in the “ short term big effect” side of attrition, specifically undermining a player’s ability to do most things since most effects end on a successful save or at the end of an encounter. Long lasting poisons should have more minor effects than the default poisoned condition, only applying to a few types of rolls or having a bane-like effect that makes judging the odds just a little bit more difficult.  
This makes poison great to use for dungeons and short-ranging exploration where the party is likely to face multiple encounters in one day. 
Diseases:  4e aced the design of these maladies by treating them as a contained skill challenge with their own CR  with various stages: stage 0: you were cured, stage 1: you suffered the initial effect, stage 2 or 3: you suffered a severe effect, with the final stage (3-4) being some effect that made the disease permanent.  When you got a disease it was usually stage 1, and you (usually) saved for it at the start of each day. Beating the DC by 5 or more meant you went down a stage (closer to 0), where as simply succeeding meant it stayed as bad as it was. Failing meant you got sicker, meaning a character could bounce up and down in wellness as an adventure went on. 
Diseases are best for longterm adventures, and often undermine one particular aspect of a character ( healing, actions assosiated with a particular stat).  Counterpoint to poisons, diseases should start out fairly gentle and then get worse the longer they’re left alone, leading to eventually devastating effects.  
Curses:  While borrowing the mechanics of diseases, I’d have curses be specifically weirder in their effects. The sort of thing that can make up the central hook or b-plot of a whole adventure.  This should also mean that curses are the hardest for the party to stumble into, but also the hardest to shake. 
Item Degradation: Detailed in a previous post HERE, the long and short of it is that item degradation is a form of player driven attrition that gently curbs their overall power level. If they go too hard, use their best items recklessly, get involved in needless fights, then they’re going to be in worse shape by the time they reach the final challenge. This was supposed be the idea behind HP/limited class abilities per day, but attrition systems cover that better IMO. 
Stress:  The psychological counterpoint to exhaustion,  I’ve already talked about Stress HERE. I tend to only use stress in horror themed adventures and campaigns, as it builds upon 5e’s optional “madness” system which fits the theme when gothic terrors and eldritch abominations but less so with the game’s usual heroic fare. 
Hunger & Supply:  I made a super lightweight system based off this idea of “depletion die” for potions and other consumables, check it out, it’s lightweight and fantastic.  Using this kind of system gives us another avenue to challenge our party, lengthening or shortening their lifeline as they lose supplies and seek out new caches. 
Thinking environmentally:  Part of the fantasy of being an adventurer is travelling to dangerous places and living to tell the tale.  We’re denying our party that fantasy if we don’t follow through on the threat the idea of these places imply.  You should risk sickness if you go into a swamp, sewer, or jungle, thirst should be a factor in desert exploration, just like freezing is for mountain and winter expeditions.  That’s to say nothing of magical hazards; cursed landscapes that drain your will to live dead marshes style, alchemical smog in a steampunk industrial zone, fading into nothingness as you approach the edge of existence.  
Figure out the natural hazards, make your party aware of the danger, and then build your adventure around the fact that they’ll need to save against the hazard each time they take a long rest.. Do they take a detour if it means having a safe place to camp? Is there a resource they need to manage along the way? Could encounters expose them to further dangers or make their current exposure worse? Keeping these ideas in mind especially when you’re planning a wilderness exploration adventure should give you lots of ideas to fill up those encounter tables. 
Adding insult to injury:  Giving enemies the ability to inflict attrition in various forms makes otherwise trivial  enemies a credible threat even to a seasoned adventuring party. As an example,  A party might breeze through a fight with some monstrous spiders ( or even ONE regular sized spider, if you can imagine) , but that spider encounter doesn’t need to be the most dangerous thing ever if their next encounter is a navigation challenge fording a river and a few of the heroes are still groggy thanks to the slow acting poison in their systems.  
In this way you can use attrition based battles to soften your party up for greater challenges, long after their HP totals and healing ability have outpaced the damage a single trap/encounter can do. 
Artist
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dravenxivuk · 10 months
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I remember studying Flowers for Algernon at school, and what a huge impact it had on me. How dreadful, I thought, to know your intelligence is slipping away and being unable to prevent it. The horror you must feel.
And now, as I sit here with my multiple chronic illnesses that cause various types of cognitive impairment, watching my ability to think, plan, create, follow instructions, find the write words and form complete sentences slip away like grains of sand through my fingers, I know what that horror feels like.
So I looked up Flowers for Algernon, to see if I could find any quotes, find out if I was misremembering it, inflating it in my mind into something grander than it was.
I was not.
The quotes are still emotionally devastating.
"I'm not going to give up my intelligence without a struggle. I can't go back down into that cave. There's no place for me to go now"
“It was as if I had been looking at the whole thing clearly on the blackboard of my mind, but when I turned to read it, part of it had been erased and the rest didn’t make sense.”
"The only question now is: How much can I hang on to?."
"But writing is harder. I have to look up even simple words in the dictionary now and it makes me angry with myself.”
Excuse me while I weep for a while for what I've lost.
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mythology-void · 3 months
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my thoughts on episode six of pjo are too numerous to count but the main thing that's driving my brain up the wall is Hermes and Luke. Hermes talking to annabeth about Luke and her immediately reminding him about how much his son despises him. Her clear disdain for him in contrast to his desperation to be close to his son.
But GOD that one line
_________
"I don't get involved anymore."
"...fine. Then this was all a waste of time. And we don't have time to waste."
_________
thinking about the fact that annabeth heard luke's argument with his dad, right before he left. thinking about how Luke flung those words in his dad's face, with a look that said you're no father of mine. thinking about annabeth hearing that, internalizing their impact and throwing those words back at him at the perfect moment. thinking about the way that sentence must have hit hermes like a punch to the gut.
thinking about Hermes being so understanding about Percy's struggles with his dad because he knew how it felt on the other side of the fence, and how he tried his best to make sure Percy understood his dad.
mostly thinking about how if hermes ever saw Luke, he might throw himself at his son's feet and beg for forgiveness, and turn and weep when luke spits in his face.
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popquizhot-shot · 10 months
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O my gosh do you think you can do a Miguel x teen reader. Where the reader has been in a depressed mood lately and no one can figure out what's wrong till they reveal that their headphones broke on their last mission and it was the last thing their remaining family member gave to them before they died and they blaime themselves for not being more careful with them.
Headphones-Miguel O’Hara x teen!reader.
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As someone who’s emotionally attached to her heradpjones yes I can and will write this. Thank you all so much for the love and support from my last post! I’ll be taking a short break after this and I hope you all like it! Please comment and reblog if you do :D love you<3333
Warnings: Implied Hobie brown x reader; mostly fluff dw, crying.
ART BY THE AMAZING @thattripleabattery
“Is it just me, or is something off about her?” Miles nods towards you who is sitting all alone away from and sipping juice desolately as they all listen to Miguel’s newest monthly goal meeting.
“Something looks off about her, like something’s missing.” Gwen narrows her eyes at your figure.
You just keep nodding at intervals and try to pay attention but all you can think about are the headphones your brother had given you.
You considered them an extension of you, going so far as to even sometimes wear them during light missions while you waited for the threat to show up.
Your last mission had been gruelling, so bad to the point that both Jess and your dad had suggested you take a break from fighting to recuperate.
You were so devastated on the inside, all you did was just nod.
You knew that Miguel knew you were off. It was obvious that you joked less and acted tired. Not to mention the little amount of sleep you got.
It was stupid really, all this drama over a pair of headphones. Yet, they were the last connection you had to your brothers and it felt like you had truly lost your family when they broke into two.
Your mind was literally empty as you nodded at whatever Miguel was saying. You just dipped your juice and kept zoning in and out. It felt wrong that they weren’t there around your neck where they usually were.
Miguel started to notice your constant fidgeting and the way your hands kept rubbing your neck. He had also noticed your dull nature and the way your sweet smile stopped making its way onto your face.
Even to his lamest dad jokes, you’d respond with a huff and small twist of your lips.
As he wrapped up the plan, his eyes flit to yours and he saw you still nodding, your eyes glassy.
He takes a deep breath, “Dismissed, all of you leave. Now.”
The shuffle of chairs fills the room as everyone files out one by one.
He says your name, “Stay back.” And turns around to look at the hologram.
Miles and Gwen look at each other and then at you, who breathes in and nods without a word.
Once everyone has left, he turns back around to find you looking at him with your hands behind your back.
“What happened?” He asks and you sign.
“Nothing.”
“It’s rude to lie.”
“Manners maketh man and all that jazz.” You reply with a roll of your eyes.
“Seriously.” He raises his eyebrow and his hand rests on your shoulder, “You okay?”
“Yeah, god I’m fine! I was just an irresponsible shit and I broke my headphones.”
His eyebrows furrow, “The ones your brother gave you?”
You clench your jaw and nod, eyes smarting as you struggle not to cry at the thought.
He shrugs, “They’re just headphones, kid. You can always get another.”
You just scoffed, “Yeah, I know.”
“I mean, you get it right?”he tips his down to make a point.
“Yeah, yeah whatever.” You smile wryly and turn away so that he can miss the tear forming in your eye, “Cool, I’ll uh catch you later boss man.”
He stares after your retreating figure with remorse, did he say something wrong?
“You dumb idiot.” Lyla pops up.
“What?” He snarls, whirling to look at her.
“She was really attached to those headphones, Miguel.”
“She can always get new ones, Lyla. I’m getting them for her anyway.”
“Miguel it’s as if her brother died all over again.” Lyla replies firmly, “She’s hurting, ans you made her feel worse.”
Miguel hangs his head, “Shit.”
The last thing he wanted to do was hurt you, but after years of shutting himself out, he didn’t understand people’s feelings like he used to, and he wanted with every fibre of his being to cheer you up, and he managed to screw it up.
“You need to go apologise and fix this.” Lyla points towards the doorway.
——————-
“It’s okay. Let it all out.” Hobie’s soothing voice is calming as his hand travels up and down your back to soothe you.
You breathe deeply before letting out another broken sob that only makes you more embarrassed, and in front of Hobie of all people. The guy just oozed absolute “don’t care” energy while still simultaneously being one of the most caring people you’d ever met.
Your apologies are hushed and he takes your face between his hands and wipes your tears from your cheeks, “You look pretty even when you cry.”
You roll your eyes, “Shut up.”
You hug him again, “Thank you.”
“I know what it’s like to lose something like that, and I’m sorry. But I know you will get over it and I salute you for being so brave.” He winks, “I’ve gotta run, catch you later.”
He quickly kisses your forehead and dashes off, leaving you stunned. After a few moments, a smile makes its way onto your puffy face.
“I’m going to kill that kid.” Miguel seethes as he watches from the camera.
———-
You were exhausted after a long day of training and you couldn’t wait to just go and fall asleep in your quarters.
The door swung open easily and your eyes flitted to the shabbily wrapped present on your bed. The bed that was unmade in the morning but was miraculously made and cleaned now.
Your eyes narrow as you tear away the wrapping to find a near identical pair of headphones to the ones that broke and your eyes widen in shock as you hold them up in front of you.
There’s a post-it stuck to the wrapping paper and you read the note that is unmistakably written by Miguel. You can recognise his chicken scratch handwriting.
“Im sorry for hurting your feelings this morning. And I hope this makes up for it. Don’t blame yourself, it was an accident and accidents happen. Im proud that you learnt your mistake and that you act so wise for your age, despite the fact that you decide to go to a weird British punk spider for advice, I am still proud of you. No es tu culpa, none of this is your fault.
Love,
Dad.”
—————-
“She seems to be in a much better mood today.” Gwen nudges Miles.
“She’s smiling and trying to get him to laugh.” Miles grins at your antics.
“Wait her headphones! They were missing, they’re back around her neck, that’s probably why she was in a shitty mood!” Pavitr reasons as Gwen nods in agreement.
“Are the three of you paying attention?” Miguel looks pointedly at the three kids and his glare then falls in Hobie who is seated next to you.
“Everyone dismissed!”
As everyone files out he says yet again, “Hobart, stay back.”
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vampykween · 5 months
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You know how some freaky stuff happens sometimes. People going missing with no evidence of them getting kidnapped at all. You see this woman with her child walking inside the grocery store, shopping for groceries then suddenly she turn a corner and she and her child was never seen again. What if that happens to wife reader and her child with toxic husband simon? Honestly I just want an excuse to read through his pov for once
anon this so eerie!!! because i literally had a nightmare i got kidnapped last night i swear!!! also, forgive me this isn't totally fleshed out :( but i knew i would be better at writing the emotional side of this versus a ton of action but i hope you enjoy it anyway!
simon could recognize you anywhere; he could never get enough of the familiar hairstyle you always wore and the curves of your body. he also could recognize the little hands clasped in yours, toddling after you. you used to always lovingly complain that your firstborn was his carbon copy, so he would quiet you with kisses and retort that you two would just have to make another baby so you could have your mini-me. you're debating between some odd two items on the shelf like you always did; he used to groan at how long you spent grocery shopping, it's not like your family strayed too far from what you got every week. now, he'd give anything to have you reminding him to check off the items on your list and to please stop letting the baby gnaw all over the handle of the cart.
simon's heart ached at the realization that he was admiring what once was his life from afar. now you two were divorced, lived in separate places (he's a little proud you worked your ass off to get your own place, but only marginally), and he didn't get to wake up on weekends with slobbery little kisses pressed into his scarred face followed by squeals of "daddy! daddy! wake up!"
shaking himself out of his daydreaming, he watches the three of you turn the corner, and despite feeling acutely aware that he probably looked like a creep, he trails behind you. instead of finding you and the girls, simon was met with the sight of a hastily abandoned cart and the tiny skeleton plushie his youngest always carried around.
suddenly he felt like he was on a mission; his senses were on high alert, and his head swiveled rapidly but steadily to survey his surroundings. there was nothing amiss in the aisle where you three had disappeared and so, he swiftly slinked through every aisle searching for any sign of his family.
when his search comes up short, simon's heart clenches painfully in his chest; his body growing hot with rage until he feels like a roaring furnace. he wasn't sure if the tears pressing behind his eyes were from anger or devastation. he couldn't bear losing his family again, not after he tried so hard to save them the first time. he may be emotionally damaged and shit at showing his appreciation, but you and those tiny girls were his entire universe. how was he supposed to go about his life when his reason for living had been snuffed out? you were the light to his dark and stormy aura, and he wouldn't rest until he found you; there was no alternative he would ever be able to forgive himself for.
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Text
“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”
Fanonwriter2023 on AO3
Where CANON and FANON collide!
Season 7 FANON Speculation: Buddie Multi-Chapter Fanfic - Hiatus Reading: “I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”
Chapter 26 is now available on AO3.
Please note: Chapters 24 and 25 were posted at the same time.
This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!
“I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”
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Currently 26 chapters completed: 1M Words; Rated: Mature
One chapter will be posted at a time.
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Here's a snippet from Chapter 26 of an emotionally distraught and hysterical Eddie while he's on the phone with 9-1-1.
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“9-1-1, what’s your emergency?”
“Yes I’m at 4995 S. Bedford St. and I have an adult male, 31 years of age who's unconscious and unresponsive and I need medical response.”
“Ok sir, can I get your name?”
“Eddie Diaz! I’m a firefighter and a paramedic with the 118.”
“Eddie!” Linda asks.
“Yes! Linda, I’m so glad it’s you.” He heaves past the sob lodged in the back of his throat that feels like a ping pong ball and continues. “Listen, it’s Buck… SHIT!” He stops talking because he remembers he needs to follow protocol for her recording then he tries again. “I mean you need his first and last name for the call. It’s my husband Evan Diaz and he’s also a firefighter with the—the 118.”
“Ok Eddie, I’m checking to see which RA unit is closest to that address but can you tell me what happened?”
“I—I don’t know but I came into the living room; he was swaying back and forth and I caught him before he—he hit the floor. I manually checked his vitals by doing the ABC method… I opened his airway, checked his breathing along with his circulation, then I—I got my medical bag and checked his pupillary response which is fine but his pulse, his blood pressure and his heart rate... and all of them are still low which is why I believe he might be having a bradycardia event. Linda… oh my god, whatever is happening to him is more serious than syncope because he’s still unresponsive.”
“Can you tell me how long he’s been down?”
“It’s been more than two minutes but I didn’t start counting until after I caught him so I could be one or two seconds off.”
“Ok, Eddie, our closest unit is 6 minutes away.”
He frowns and loudly asks, “Six minutes? Why?! I’m sorry please—please forgive me for being loud but I... I—I’m asking because there’s a fire station less than 4 minutes away from here.” He feels like he’s about to crawl out of his skin because the proximity of their home to the closest fire station in this area is one of the reasons why he decided to purchase it. He wanted to be close to one for Chris just in case they ever have to call emergency services.
Will the RA unit arrive in time to save Buck or will Eddie lose the love of his life? 👀
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This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!
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Fic Summary: Months after Buck and Eddie were hit by the same lightning strike; they’re still struggling with the aftermath of it.  But before they make their love confessions, they’ll spend time getting to know themselves as individuals first. Eddie learns to enjoy the simple things in life as he participates in activities on his own and with new friends while Buck learns the rest of the 31-year-old deep dark family secret about his conception and birth. Their journey to forever is still a work in progress but once they finally admit they’re in love with each other, everything that follows their love confessions will be cataclysmic.
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Chapter Summaries
Chapter 1 - Eddie makes a new friend while Buck receives devastating news regarding the sperm donation he made for Connor and Kameron.
Chapter 2 - Buck does a lot of research to learn more about the abnormalities found in his red blood cells and Eddie starts a new therapy journey that’s all about him and not the traumas he’s experienced.
Chapter 3 - After more than a month, Buck and Eddie finally spend time together outside of work but it doesn’t end well and they part with a lot of uncertainty regarding their places in each other’s lives.
Chapter 4 - Eddie has a few realizations about his life which causes him to consider moving back to El Paso, TX while Buck continues to be reminded of his past which causes him to take an impromptu road trip across America.
Chapter 5 - Both Buck and Eddie have difficult conversations with their parents and Buck finally learns the truth behind the reason why his mother despised him while Eddie finally tells his mother about the way she tries to control him.
Chapter 6 - More than two weeks after Buck pushed Eddie away after suggesting they needed a break; Eddie decides to try again. Eddie’s there for Buck when he’s at his worst just like Buck was there for him when he was at his worst and he won’t let Buck give up.
Chapter 7 - After Buck’s mental breakdown, Eddie has his back the same way Buck had his when he had his own breakdown more than a year ago.  They share several vulnerable and emotionally intimate moments with one another and they begin to realize their small, sweet and caring gestures matter just as much if not more than any grand gesture ever could because these are the foundations of a long-lasting love relationship.
Chapter 8 - Buck, Eddie and Chris all have their own therapists and during their sessions, they reflect on their pasts while they’re in the present so they can prepare for their future together as a family.
Chapter 9 - Buck and Eddie are there for each other when Buck has to testify as a witness during the trial.  But by the end of it, they’ll both realize their individual and shared traumas are going to keep resurfacing until they talk about them, deal with the fact that they’re in love with one another and face the fact that they can’t live without each other.
Chapter 10 - As Buck and Eddie finally begin to confront their past traumas, they realize how much they need each other to fill in the gaps of their memories.  Additionally, the universe screams at them for what appears to be the one hundredth time so Buck can realize he doesn’t have to ‘find it’ because he already ‘made it’ and Eddie’s reminded tomorrow isn’t promised and he doesn’t have to die alone if he doesn’t want to.
Chapter 11 - A “virga” or dry thunderstorm is in the forecast but once the rain starts, the thunderstorm happening outside won’t be able to match the storm brewing inside between Buck and Eddie.  It’s the universe’s final scream and when the tumultuous winds begin to blow, they’ll have one last chance to hold onto everything they’ve built over the last six years or they’ll lose it all forever.
Chapter 12 - Buck and Eddie have always shared a deep physical attraction and an emotional intimacy that’s unmatched but now that they’re in a relationship, they’re learning how to navigate the romantic intimacy they’ve been waiting for six years to explore. The love they have for each other is a once in a lifetime, soulmate, love of their lives type of love that transcends space and time.
Chapter 13 - While navigating the newness of their romantic relationship, Buck and Eddie take advantage of every moment they spend together. As their individual lives, people from their pasts, time constraints and the possibility of losing each other again make attempts to interrupt and interfere with their journey to forever, they love, care for, support and hold onto each other even tighter to withstand it all.
Chapter 14 - Buck and Eddie can see the lights at the end of the tunnels regarding the results of Buck’s Cancer Screening along with everything else they’re dealing with. But are the lights they see exits to the tunnels or are they headlights on different runaway trains that are speeding towards them in an effort to interrupt their forever?
Chapter 15 - Buck and Eddie have known they were exactly who the other one wanted in a partner since they met six years ago when they agreed to have each other’s backs. They’re in a romantic relationship, they’re both preparing to ask the other one to spend forever with them and by the end of the seventh week into their relationship, together they will plan their most important and greatest adventure for their future.
Chapter 16 - As Buck and Eddie begin to prepare for their marriage ceremony that will take place in Rome, Italy in December 2023, they start planning their first international adventure as a romantic couple. Even though Chris is still the only person they’ve told about their relationship, several people who know them have already witnessed the love they share and as the days continue, others will witness it too.
Chapter 17 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to departing Los Angeles for their international adventure, a moment in time will remind them; life is fragile, tomorrow isn’t promised and every second of everyday should be cherished because everything can change in an instant. The result of that realization will cause them to hold onto each other even more.
Chapter 18 - As Buck, Eddie and Chris prepare for family gatherings before and during the Thanksgiving holiday, the “Santa Ana Winds” start to blow and all sorts of expected and unexpected familial drama ensues.
Chapter 19 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to their wedding day, the universe begins to align everything so that some of their parent and children's relationships are strengthened while others come to an abrupt end.
Chapter 20 - With only 14 days remaining until Buck, Eddie and Chris depart Los Angeles, CA traveling to Rome, Italy, for their first family adventure, an early morning conversation about “tying up loose ends” helps Buck and Eddie realize there are still several things left unfinished on their ‘To Do’ lists. The question is will there be enough time to complete all of them?
Chapter 21 - Buck, Eddie and Chris are finalizing their ‘To Do’ Lists, double checking their itineraries and packing their suitcases in preparation for their trip to Europe so they can board their flight that departs Los Angeles, CA on Friday, December 15, 2023 at 3:25PM.
Chapter 22 - While Buck, Eddie and Chris spend the first 8 days of their European family adventure in Italy, their primary reason for going will be fulfilled as well as several others they hadn’t considered or anticipated.
Chapter 23 - As the Diaz Family continues their Italian family adventure, they’ll say, “Ciao” or hello and goodbye to a lot of things almost immediately after they become an official and legal family.
Chapter 24 - After Buck, Eddie and Chris arrive in London, England on December 24th; the Diazes immediately start preparing to spend their first family Christmas together. During their stay, each of them will hear a few choice words that will be the life raft to get them home to complete their searches to be seen and to be found.
Chapter 25 - After spending more than two weeks in Europe, Eddie, Buck and Chris are back in Los Angeles and they’re getting ready to attend Maddie and Chimney’s New Year’s Eve party. During the event, they have plans to make two surprise announcements but the question is, who’s really going to be surprised, the Diaz family or their found family at the 118?
Chapter 26 - Buck and Eddie are once again faced with their greatest fear of losing each other but this time it could be permanent and if it is, then they won’t be able to spend the rest of their lives together.
Chapter 27 - Will be posted soon.
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Read chapters 1-26 are available on AO3.
Continue reading on AO3
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