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inkskinned · 1 year

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there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

#this is objectively bad advice #don't listen to it protect yourself and do real work on yourself find one of the good posts i've made about this #but also. u know. if u want to have fun while u do the work of setting boundaries #.... it IS fun #i will say that my fear of him went SO down after i just started. fucking with him.#bc i used to get SO fucking upset #i'd spend WEEKS arguing with him. tearing my hair out. sick with anxiety and dread and anger about all of it #and now i just LITERALLY do not engage #instead i'm like '' haha :) mole people" and get the HELL out of any tense conversation #i kind of think some of these people are literally addicted to drama as a form of connection #they like the rush they get from arguing #but those arguments are incredibly damaging for me #so like..... i am in the process of literally rehabilitating this person to figure out how to find connection thru #NORMAL CONVERSATION #he doesn't get it yet #i also do talk to them like they're preschool kids lmafo . ''are you using a safe and kind voice right now?''#'' do you need a snackie? you sound a little upset. let's have some hummus and come back to playtime when we feel ready''

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myrkulitescourge · 5 months

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the way that one line from the new epilogue in an astarion romance is going to HAUNT me

just. what a profoundly intense thing to confess to someone.

like, just these six months of newfound happiness with you exerts a force on his heart equal and in direct opposition to two centuries of endless torment, the gnawing hunger and exploitation. this flashbulb-bright fraction of his long life holds the same gravity to him as years upon years of darkness and suffering.

in all likelihood, he hasn’t even known his lover for as long as his worst memory lasted, that year sealed away to go mad from starvation and sensory deprivation, yet he still tells them this brief time has been so fundamentally and powerfully important that the weight of even that unimaginable hell is vanishingly small compared to this present he has now and the future ahead of them both.

how am i supposed to act normal about this.

#i need to lay down #just drop this in there right at the beginning why not!#that’s INTENSE. and completely sincere considering his demeanor at the party. god #he’s so… nice. in the romanced epilogue. i expected him to be a little smug and jokey #if tav told him the others weren’t doing so hot without the two of them around #but he takes it so genuinely and with visible disappointment?? literally shocked me #i thought he would say oh of course their lives have taken a turn without our impressive leadership lol!#and then redirect into something a little less flippant #but man. he just gets sad. astarion six months into a loving relationship is like a stray cat that instantly gets cuddly when you adopt it #dude went cotton candy marshmallow saccharine sweet in a HEARTBEAT #bless the others with your presence he says. i’ll always be here he says. we have forever after all he says.#head in my hands. how could they do this to me #astarion ancunin #astarion bg3 #astarion #bg3 epilogue spoilers #bg3 spoilers #baldur’s gate 3 spoilers #bg3

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daftmooncretin · 2 months

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supernatural movie reboot but its a ghostfacers mockumentary about their attempt to make a “serious film” about sam and dean winchester. opens on ed and harry going “CUT!” and the camera pans to a guy that looks kind of like jared padalecki pulling off a party city wig. turns out the finale was actually part of the ghostfacer’s retelling of supernatural. Sam Dean and Castiel spend the entire movie chasing after ed and harry trying to stop the thing being made. (its a huge commercial success and they screen it at the destiel wedding)

#supernatural #spn #also ed and harry track down all the supporting characters for an interview and they make up ridiculous shit to try get it into the movie #rowena: oh yes dear poor dean died! he was pegged to death im afraid 😧#dean: im still ALIVE #garth: and then poor cas went to gay superhell! ghostfacers: omg 😳 just like corbett #claire: yeah rip dean fly high buddy 🙏#charlie: i heard his car was flown up to heaven with him 😫#eileen: and then sam left me for a blurry tradwife 😤#dean and cas have to leave the honeymoon earlt to try and track them down but none of their friends will rat on ed and harry cause they #all think its hilarious #the ghostfacers #destiel #dean winchester #castiel #sam winchester

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nerdpoe · 2 months

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Clark needs to get into the alien spaceship that's attacking Metropolis. Kara, Jon, and Kon are all busy helping civilians. There's a force field around the ship that's stopping him. Then an RV launches itself off of the building next to him and straight into the spaceship.

Jack and Maddie had been heading through Metropolis to Gotham to attend a tech expo. Danny and Jazz were left home, and they were getting daily updates from Jazz.

Then aliens started attacking Metropolis.

And, well, clearly none of these people know defensive driving. The GAV is more than equipped to punch a hole through that forcefield, they can tell from the readings they're getting.

So...why not lend a helping hand?

Anyways that's how the Drs Fenton ended up on the Justice League roster as resident Mad Scientists.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #phanfic #story prompt #i like to think this is post reveal #and the reveal went well #the GAV tearing through an alien spaceship #blasting down doors and shit #gets to the control room for jack and maddie to hop out and just whale on the baddie #he was livestreaming to any TV in the world #suddenly two dorks in hazmat suits that won't stop calling each other honeybunches and fudgecakes #are pummeling him with frightening efficiency

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parisoonic · 7 months

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two hugs; years apart. (or a monday and a friday.)

#tf2 medic #tf2 heavy #heavymedic #red oktoberfest #tf2 #tf2 fanart #team fortress 2 #this is the first piece of ship art where my manfriend looked at this and went 'hmm...cute' LOL im wearing him down #i wanted some stickers for a sketchbook cover LOL one for front and one for back #medic initially was more pissed in the first one hence the description but eh...i cant be arsed to think of anything new #Nooo I forgot heavy’s flak vest in the first one! Head in hands…we’ll it’s staying like this lmao

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bluegiragi · 6 months

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guess who's about to learn all about werewolf tail etiquette

early access + nsfw on patreon

#in case i didnt make it clear enough #simon went to get soap's file to try track down soap's old shithead officer #silly snoopy man #also i tried to convey that simons a lot warmer and casual when its just him and price #i hope that got through #monster 141 au #simon ghost riley #captain john price #giragi art

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ofswordsandpens · 8 months

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actually I also wanna talk about the part where Percy convinces Bob to kill Hyperion because even though Percy never says anything outright sinister, the way he handles the entire situation with such cool ease, playing on Bob’s emotions... its so insane???

Because Annabeth’s reaction to the three of them encountering Hyperion reforming is: “oh this is bad we need to get out of here” She knows if Bob remembers himself, that it's not going to play out well for Percy and her. She also thinks about how they're being pursued and don't have a lot of time. Her solution to the problem, seemingly, is to leave.

But Percy's solution is to work the situation to his advantage. He re-affirms Bob's loyalty to him:

Percy then re-establishes Bob's moral code: "Some monsters are good. Some are bad. This Titan is bad. He tried to kill me and a lot of people. He's not good like you are."

And it ends with Percy leaving the choice of whatever to do with Hyperion to Bob but of course, is it really what Bob chose to do? Bob decides to kill Hyperion. It's not what he may have done, if Percy hadn't intervened. But it's exactly what Percy was oh-so-sweetly leading Bob to do.

And listen, I'm not claiming that it was exactly morally bankrupt of Percy to take advantage of a once-evil titan who could get him and his girlfriend through hell in one piece. Percy, Annabeth, they manipulate monsters and enemies all the time. Annabeth ended the previous book with manipulating Arachne into weaving her own web. So it's not exactly like she's against using manipulative tactics, in theory.

But Bob, at this point, is not just some monster. He is so painfully sincere in his belief in Percy and their friendship, so yes, it does feel a bit sinister whenever Percy uses Bob... and he really uses Bob.

And I think what makes the scene so unsettling, it isn't just that Percy manipulated Bob, its how well Percy manipulated him. He manipulates Bob so well that Percy doesn't even have to kill Hyperion... because Bob does it for him. He manipulates Bob so well, that Annabeth couldn't tell if Percy was purposefully trying to manipulate the situation. (Newsflash, he most definitely was). Like holy shit.

#percy: friends kill for friends <3 #ITS CHILLING #Riordan allowed Percy to be unhinged for ONE book in hoo and then got to boo and went #/um actually writing the realistic outcome of Percy's turmoil in Tartarus sounds like a lot of work so how bout I dont :)/#okay wait while I love this scene in hoh the one part I dont like was Annabeth being like: I had no clue Percy could be so cunning #and like girl YES YOU DO #you were there in BOOK 1 when Percy convinced Crusty to lay down in his OWN bed and then decapitated him #I choose to believe she was simply afraid unsettled and in denial lmaoooo #pjo #percy jackson #annabeth chase #mine

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mipexch · 4 months

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since layer 7 dropped you can send literally any enemy to go kill something wicked repeatedly & v2 being the one to do that is just really funny to me

#ultrakill #something wicked #v1 #v2 #its gonna fucking KILL YOU!!!!#it literally circles around them like it does v1 and its really funny to me. like Really funny #you can hear something wicked start hissing as v2 hunts it down #literally almost got me when i was camping out in the terminal room but v2 saved me.........#very fun to mess with #minos was funnier but much worse #couldnt even figure out where they went i could just hear him going DIE and slamming into the ground before something wicked started making #-noises again and teleporting #i stand by something wicked being the ONLY thing v1 is afraid of #because me too. honestly #gen art

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pokeberry5 · 6 months

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girl experiences gender euphoria and is immediately slammed by grief

for @litttlittt <3. this was supposed to be a portrait of caroline hill, but litta mentioned tim looking like janet when dressed as caroline and identity issues and angst and things spiraled

something about tim not knowing if he's his mother's child or bruce's or neither's.

figuring out the looks:

i wanted janet to have that poofy 70s hair

#tim drake #dc #bruce wayne #janet drake #sart #i'm picturing this as transfemme tim hence “he” and also compounding issues about bruce treating him as a daughter #which is exactly the gender validation tim wants and needs but isnt sure he deserves #but this also definitely works for trans tim #she gets to process that she looks like her mom!! and her mom will never get to know her daughter #would she have wanted to know her daughter? even though she showered tim with love when she was around #she barely knew her son #gender idk he's a girl 👍 hope that helps #i went down a rabbit hole looking up vintage dior necklaces -- hopefully something martha wayne wouldve worn #-- but dior necklaces are COMPLICATED #i almost drew pearls but i think that wouldve been too cruel to bruce lol #(a decent amount of my art--even when it's not femme tim--gets tagged 'gender' and i dont know what im going but im glad 👍)

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service4cops · 6 months

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"This guy had better be as good as the say he is."

He needn't have worried, I was better than he was expecting, intuitively sliding my tongue deep into the source of all his stress and tension, before velvet gloving him until he blasted his batter, balls deep, as I swallowed down all nine spurts of his sticky spew.

That's what you call service and that's what he's gonna get from me every time he stops by.

#wonder if he's any good #is he any good?#what does he do?#does he rim?#does he swallow?#first time #one his way over #in desperate need #balls needed draining #uk police #UK Cop #licked his arse #went down on him #serviced to completion #blasted in my mouth #massive load #multiple spurts #thick and creamy #swallowed it all

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service4marriedmen · 28 days

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When you fortuitously spill your coffee and Daddy has to change his shirt.

I got on my knees, undid he belt, and looked up and said "here, let me give you a hand with that", while unzipping his jeans.

Like all married men, he offered little resistance and let me make it up to him by taking him my mouth and sucking his beautifully thick cock to completion, swallowing his salty spew as he released it in my mouth, without any warning or hesitation.

Confidence is sexy, swallowing is sexier and I loved swallowing Daddy's long neglected load.

I'll do the same for you: [email protected]

#make it up to me #hot daddy #shirtless #let me make it up to you #made it up to him #let me take care of you #gave him a hand #helped him out #got on my knees for him #went down on him #blew him #no words needed #took care of him

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 1 year

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more of the dapper lad! i Cannot get him out of my brain

#i sit down to draw dragons and/or ocs and OOPS my hand slipped its wally #hes so. bites him bites him bites him #but affectionately <3 #but also with affectionate intent to maim <3 #every time i feel like my feelings about him are starting to level out to a normal baseline....#....i feel a heart squeeze and im back to insanity #welcome home #scribble garnish #wally darling #welcome home wally #welcome home puppet show #also i am once again imaging that he is modeling for sally #this is alternatively titled 'consistency? dont know her'#his hair confuses me so much #no matter how many times i look at references or draw him it still baffles me #which way does it curl? how does it floof? fuck if i know!#yknow before i drew this i set out with the intent to put Other neighbors in schmancy outfits #and then i saw that colorblock shirt. and it all went downhill #its 2 am now.#i spent a solid hour making a fancy background but i scrapped it bc it was Too Much

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puppetmaster13u · 4 months

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Prompt 177

Now Dan is no coward. He’s not.

But this stupid child body does have an effect on his reactions to things and honestly it’s a horrible thing that’s too small and too weak for him to use all his abilities. He could barely manage a fireball if he concentrated, yet everything caught fire with a mere outburst! His control was utterly gone, and a tantrum resulted in having to wear a stupid child leash backpack.

It wasn’t like he was really a child, and it wasn’t like he’d get lost or some stupid shit that Danny would insist. Ugh, this isn’t even fair, technically he was older than him yet was stuck in a smaller body that he kept tripping over!

Urgh, he’s even insisting on rewarding ‘good behavior’ and shit- must have talked to Jazz or something- because… Oh. No he wants the constellation bear, give! His star bear now, no takes back and, urgh, stupid baby body!

Well, on the other hand, it’s utterly hilarious how much Danny sputters whenever he calls him Mom, not to mention strangers’ utter befuddlement. He ignores how Danny seems to be trying his best to live up ro the title.

But! As he was saying, he’s no coward! He’s also not an idiot though, and having no control over his powers isn’t exactly a good thing. It’s really not a good thing when there’s a murderous-looking hero that he thinks he might have maimed in the future- which they apparently remember- staring down at him. So, he has to call in the big guns to fix this.

“Mom, there’s a creepy fruitloop staring at me!” “There’s WHAT?!” Hah. Take that hero he doesn’t remember the name of.

(Behold the Grumpiest of Babies)