#you can get SOOOOOO particular with writing

[obstinaterixatrix]

All of your live blogs have been so entertaining to read haha

Honestly I've been taking mental notes whenever you talk about how story flows and themes etc etc, even more so with your recent reading through the book and how to utilize repetition and condense things

the thing about analyzing media is there’s a bunch of different layers you can engage in, like in terms of content/text and then in terms of the mechanics of rhetoric and language and structure, and it’s… really fun! breaking things down in terms of what works and why it works, for things you like and things you don’t like. actually if you’ve ever got the time or interest definitely look into mark forsyth’s elements of eloquence, it’s great and easy to read and really helps with getting into the mechanics of writing.

#ask #anonymous #I remember a while I go I was turning around in my head the idea of tension & contrast as the most important components of a story for me #with momentum as something that comes from the combo #but it’s been a while so I forgot most of it lol #also there was this GREAT #syllabus/intro for using punctuation in scientific writing (lol) #and I read if years ago but haven’t been able to find it since #but I LOVE how punctuation affects the rhythm and tone of writing #you can get SOOOOOO particular with writing #there’s also a lot of like #okay so to some extent if we’re looking at some parts of the book #by traditional romance format some scenes would probably be rec’d to cut or smth because it goes counter to standard structure #like it’d be a tighter story that would be a bit more cohesive #but sometimes it’s fun to read something that’s not as rigid yknow??? #the kind of storh that comes across a little amateurish but it’s charming

[solaireverie]

cl16 | are we out of the woods yet?

summary: [ charles leclerc x f!driver!reader — social media au / fic ] after you get into a rough crash, charles is faced with difficult decisions

request: can i get a female driver reader injury/crash angst with daniel, seb or charles pls love your fics!

warnings: crashes and injuries, general medical stuff, unspecified mentions of death (implied to be jules and hervé), open/unclear ending

author’s note: hihi lovely!! tysm for requesting <3 hope this is enough angst for you ;) also i have no clue how to write injuries soooooo just roll with it

5,891 likes

ynupdates y/n has been taken to the medical center following her crash in the #brazilgp. no further news has been released yet. we're all behind you, y/n! 🤞

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user did anyone see if she was able to get out of the car by herself?

↪ user no, i think she had to be extracted by the medical crew 😬

user i hope she's okay...

Charles' phone is halfway out of his pocket when it starts ringing. Glancing at the screen, he swipes to accept the call when he sees that it's from your mother. He had called her a few minutes ago, when the sight of your crash had first appeared on the screens in the Ferrari paddock, but she hadn’t picked up. Her voice filters through the speakers of his phone, worry tinging her tone. 

“Do you have news yet?” she asks.

“Don’t know,” Charles replies, “I’m on my way to see her now. It… might be good to book a flight — and soon.” He doesn’t want to alarm your mom but it seems inevitable and he knows that you would want her next to you. 

“Okay,” she breathes shakily, “and Charles?”

“Yeah?”

“She better be okay when I get there.”

Charles winces. Of all the people in the world, he knows all too well why you can never make any promises, especially in Formula 1. 

“I’ll do my best,” he says and ends the call.

There’s a marshal waiting for him in the tiny waiting area in the medical center. He’s pacing nervously and immediately strides towards Charles as soon as he sees him. 

“Mr. Leclerc,” he begins, “the doctors wanted to see you before they take any further action. You have medical power of attorney for Ms. L/N in case of emergency, correct?” 

Charles nods numbly. It had been a precaution at the time because you had insisted that out of everyone in the paddock, you trusted him the most. He had accepted it without thinking twice but now the weight of the responsibility settles heavily over his shoulders. He follows the marshal past empty treatment rooms until they reach one with its door thrown open. 

Charles feels his lunch crawling back up his throat as he stares at your figure. You’re laid out on a stretcher and you’d almost look peaceful if not for the numerous medical apparatuses connected to you and the thin trickle of dried blood on your temple. He somehow finds his voice again.

“What happened?” he asks, almost afraid to hear the answer.

A paramedic steps forward. “Ms. L/N took quite a knock in her crash, I’m afraid,” she explains gently. “Something came loose in the cockpit and hit her head. We’re not sure if there’s any further internal injuries, but our professional opinion is that she should be moved as soon as possible to a hospital for further testing.”

Charles swallows around a lump in his throat. “Is there any particular risk with transporting her in this state?” 

The paramedic shakes her head. “No more than the usual, which is relatively low compared to the risk that we run by keeping her here without knowing if there’s anything else wrong.” 

Charles follows your ambulance all the way into the hospital in a haze. He barely registers the press grouped outside the entrance, pushing through them, always keeping you in his sights. He waits outside of the examination room they bring you into and follows as they wheel you around, receiving god knows how many tests. 

After a while members of your team start showing up, although they keep a respectful distance from Charles. He’s glad. He knows, rationally, that you were just unlucky, but the irrational and protective side of him is screaming at him to place the blame at someone’s feet. He knows you wouldn’t appreciate him blowing up at your team, though, so he doesn’t say anything to them and keeps vigil by your side as the doctors poke and prod.

Eventually you’re carefully placed in a hospital bed and Charles is pulled aside by what seems to be the main doctor assigned to you.

“Unfortunately, it seems as if we will have to operate on Ms. L/N,” he says gently. “Someone else will go over the details with you, but long story short she’s bleeding internally and it’s imperative that we get to it as soon as possible. Of course, any operation of this size could potentially be dangerous, but I strongly recommend taking action sooner rather than later.”

Charles shakes his head, the words not yet registering in his scattered mind. “Is she going to be okay?” he mumbles, not meeting the doctor’s eyes.

He can feel the doctor’s pitying gaze on him and Charles doesn’t have it in him to tell him that he’s been here before — not this specific hospital, no, but he’s been on this side of the conversation that they’re having already, and it tears his heart up just as much as the first time. The only difference this time is that he’s the one who has to make the choice, not anyone else.

“We can’t make any guarantees,” the doctor cautions, “but it would significantly raise her chances of survival if we act now.”

Charles winces at the doctor’s words. Survival. Drive to survive, surviving to drive, the irony of the situation isn’t lost on him. He uncurls his fingers gingerly from where he had been unconsciously gripping his pants. 

He wants to avoid the decisions he knows he will have to make in the next twenty-four hours. He wants to pretend that nothing happened, that you’re still on the track, passing everyone in your way. He wants to go back to this morning, when he had kissed you goodbye before jogging off to get ready for the race. He wishes he had taken time to do more than peck you and throw a “love you!” over his shoulder. Charles wants to hide from the cold, stark reality he’s faced with. Your life lies in his hands and Charles is so, so tired of bleak hospital hallways.

He wants to scream at the heavens. He’s suffered and given so much already. Is one shred of happiness too much to ask? Charles had known the risks going in when he started dating you — one Formula 1 driver was usually more than enough jeopardy in a relationship, let alone two — but he’d never really thought that the day would arrive where he would have to make decisions about you, without you. 

Charles stares at your face through the window to your room, tracing the curves and slopes with his eyes. It’s the face he wakes up next to almost every day and he curses himself for not cherishing the time he’s already had with you more. His brain is moving a mile a minute, running through all the possible outcomes. At the end of the day, though, he’s only got one choice.

Charles Leclerc has always been selfish and he’ll be damned if he lets another person he loves slip through his fingers.

“Where do I sign?”

likes and reblogs are appreciated!

masterlist | taglist: @boiohboii @vellicora

#solwriting #f1 x reader #formula 1 x reader #formula one x reader #formula 1 #f1 #f1 fanfic #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 x you #f1 social media au #f1 imagine #f1 smau #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc smau

[mysicklove]

Pairings: Drunk! Bachira x Fem! Reader

Word Count: 1.7k

Summary: Just a silly little fic where reader has to take care of her lovely, very intoxicated (and horny) bf

A/N: Very self-indulgent. I had a lot of fun writing this, even if its a little pointless and I have little ppl reading my bllk stuff

Bachira is a lightweight. Sure the muscles he gained from the years of soccer helped him just a little, but other than that, after three drinks he is a goner. Some nights he cries about everything he sees, others he's laughing till he physically can't anymore. You'll never know what you'll get, but either way, he has to be watched 24/7.

And of course, his friends like to use this against him. In a couple of days it is his birthday, so the boys took him out drinking to celebrate. You didn't mind, it's not like your boyfriend would ever do anything too bad while intoxicated. Besides, you threatened Isagi enough to watch over him.

Of course, the knocking on your apartment door did not sound like a good sign. Nor Isagis slightly slurred, "Y/N! Open up!"

You sigh, and stand up from your spot on the couch to hear Kunigamis gruff, "Dude be nice!"

"Please open up?"

"We are at Y/Ns house? Woaahhhhh!"

You open the door to see Kunigami, Isagi, and of course your boyfriend. He is being held up by the two, his head lolled to the side and a lazy grin on his face.

You raise your eyebrows at Isagi in particular. He knew how easily Bachira gets drunk. "Really?"

"Hey don't look at me! Kunigami was the one who gave him shots!"

Your mouth flies open and you turn to the orange-haired man. "You gave him shots? Are in insane? He gets tipsy off a sip of alcohol!"

"Y/NNNNN," Bachira whines, trying to wave at you from the hands on the two's shoulders. You half-heartedly wave back, looking back to the other two for an explanation.

Kunigami leans forward to get a look at Isagi. "How was I know he was a lightweight?"

Isagi points a thumb at you. "He was crying about how he missed her after two drinks!"

Before Kunigami could argue, Bachira tries to reach out for you, and goes toppling forward. All three of you guys catch him, your hand on his chest to try and steady him. "You caught me!" He giggles to you, smiling as his forehead bumps yours.

"Yeah no, we caught you. Y/N, do you think you can handle him?" Isagi says glancing at you, hoping you aren't too mad.

You sigh, and manage to wrap an arm around your shoulder. He leans his head onto your shoulder, trying to get as close to you as possible. He was so clingy when drunk. "Yeah yeah. I'm fine. He isn't too heavy."

The boys both sigh in relief and help pass him on to you. You turn around and wave them goodbye. They nod and apologize before you shut the door. You hear Kunigami mumble something about how this trip was sobering him up.

"Let's get you to clean up and to bed, hmm?" You sigh, rubbing his hair affectionately and beginning to drag him to the bathroom. It was harder than you thought, considering he was basically putting all his weight on you, and cuddling up to you.

"I had fun tonight!"

"Yeah?" You respond, maneuvering him to sit on the closed toilet seat. He nods his head, it's slow and wobbly, but cute.

"But I—But then I was like.....Like where is Y/N? I miss Y/N." Both of his hands are planted in between his slightly spread legs, and he's swaying from side to side. "And they were getting mad at me!"

An amused smile pulls at your face as you open the cupboard and pull out a soft light blue headband. "What did they say?" You say, placing the headband over his face, and then back up again to remove his bangs from his face.

He touches the headband, while his eyebrows slightly furrow. "Hmmmm...They said—Oh! They said I was being dramatic! And I was soooooo confused. Because I am not dramatic, Isagi is the dramatic one!"

You bark a small laugh as you use a wet rag to damp his face with water. "I like your laugh," He mumbles, head falling forward onto your stomach. You prop him back up and he pouts at you but doesn't say anything.

You grab the face wash and foam it up, before turning back to him and spreading it on his face. He blinks up at you and smiles at the proximinity. "You are so pretty, Y/N"

"Thanks, Meguru. Can you close your eyes for me? I don't want to get soap in them." He obeys with a hum and begins to sway again, but this time it seems more purposeful as if he was just happy to be there.

'Y'know, I think I like you. Like really really really like you," He chirps, leaning into your touch, and allowing his face to get massaged by the soap.

You laugh at him, a grin plastered on your face. "Weird...Cause I happen to really really really like you too." His eyes fly open with his smile. "Close them."

"Oooooh so demanding. I like that too."

You ignore him, instead grabbing the washcloth and beginning to remove the soap from his face. "So I was thinking....." He opens his eyes when he feels you dab at his forehead.

You can tell he is looking at you to prompt him. "Yeah?"

"Wellllllllll, I think tonight. Well actually! And tomorrow and after tomorrow and the day after—"

"Meguru," You warn, cutting off his ramblings.

He giggles at you. "We should have sex!"

You pull off his headband and set it back away, trying to fight back the smile. "You are a horny drunk. It's not happening tonight, that's for sure."

He lets out a loud dramatic whine and stands up, wobbling over to you. "But whyyyyy. It's my birthday! And I am not drunk!"

You watch him stumble over his feet and raise an eyebrow. Before he could fall you grab at his side and lead him back down to the toilet. You hand him a glass of water. "Drink."

He takes a couple gulps of water under your watchful gaze, before cringing from the lack of air, and slamming it back on the counter. He immediately goes back to the conversation before. "Whyyyyyy. But I like—No love you! This is what people who are dating do!"

"Because you are drunk. Your breath smells like straight alcohol. And your birthday is not for another two days, egoist."

"I am going to brush my teeth. And then—You!" He jabs a finger in your face. "Will meet me!" Finger flips around to point at himself. "In the bed in five minutes. Where we!" He rotates the finger back and forth between the two of you. "Will make love."

You nod at him, patting his head in a teasing way. "Lets work on the first task. And I will think about it."

He seems to like this answer, eyes lighting up. "Really?"

"Sure," You say, knowing its definitely not happening. You grab his toothbrush and lather it with toothpaste.

"Oh my—I just remembered something."

"Hmm?" You mumble, putting water on the bristles.

"I got hit on at the bar!" He giggles, looking up at you with a grin.

You narrow your eyes and cock your head to the side. It's not like you were worried about it, but still, it was not something to hear about it. "She said—Wait. What did she say? Oh! Oh! She said I was "totes adorbs" Isn't that funny, Y/N? She was a foreigner!"

You didn't think it was too funny. You hand him the toothbrush, but he doesn't take notice to it, still immersed in the story. "But hey! Guess what."

"What?"

"I said I was married. And coming back home to my wife. My wife as in you! You are my wife. Er-um, pretend wife, who will be my real wife soon!" He rambles on, leaning forward toward you to hopefully coax out some approval.

You indulge him, smiling at him. "Good job, my pretend husband," You tease, ruffling up his hair gently. "Now, brush your teeth."

He nods, plunging the toothbrush into his mouth and getting to work. You lead him to the sink and he spits it out and turns to you with approval. You nod at him, and he gives himself a thumbs up in the mirror.

ust when you are about to lead him out of the bathroom, you watch a frown begin to form. Not a good sign. The waterworks were coming. "I missed you so much," He whines gripping onto your shirt, as tears begin to prick at his eyes.

"Wow, Meguru. You really are drunk. C'mon, let's get you to bed," You sigh, hoisting him up and helping him toward the bedroom.

He sniffles at you, leaning into your neck. "Did you not miss me?"

"I missed you desperately," You tease, smiling at him and wiping away the dramatic crocodile tears.

He seems to like this answer, nodding to himself. "Good. Cause I missed you."

"I know, love."

"A lot. I was so so sad." You cover your mouth to hold back the laugh. You didn't want to encourage him even more or make him cry again. "But don't worry! I am happy again!"

"I'm glad." You say as you begin to undress him.

"Woah. Woah. Woah. You said—You said! We weren't doing it tonight. But look at you." You glance up at him in amusement and then tug his sleep shirt on. Once he realizes it, he pouts and looks away.

Then you pull up the covers for him and lead him into bed. He more like trips into the sheets, but you throw a pillow on him, not worried about it.

Finally, you get on your side and tuck yourself in next to him. "Goodnight Meguru, let's hope the hangover isn't too bad."

"I really want to have sex," He turns to you, blinking at you in the dark.

You sigh, pushing a pillow in front of his face. "Maybe tomorrow, you drunk. Goodnight Meguru."

He groans one last time, and you hear him mumble, "Worst birthday gift ever." into the pillow. He falls asleep in less than thirty seconds.

#mello.writes #bachira x reader #bachira x you #bachira meguru #x reader #reader insert #bllk bachira #bachira fluff #meguru bachira x reader #bllk x reader #bachira meguru x reader #fem reader #fem! reader #bachira fanfic #meguru fluff #bllk fluff #bllk x you

[vibratingskull]

Hey, since I'm back on my Thrawn bullshit and love your writing I wanted to please ask for some slow burn Academy friends where he and femReader have been friends since the Academy and she follows his way throught the ranks...but it is platonic (it is not they are both in denial) where he ruins all of her relationships because none of these men are good enought for her and she is his anyway (just Thrawn beeing jealous) and she unintentional lets him because he is her best friend...during the exile she figures it out and is rather pissed at him but they make it work and finaly get their shit together and confess their feelings.....

That sounds pretty yandere to me, soooooo... I hope you're okay with Yanderish Thrawn , because I love him! 😋

ThrawnxF!reader

“It’s not you, it’s me.” He just says.

You remain silent, taking the beating. You can’t believe another one of your couple is broking AGAIN. What in the world are you doing wrong with those men?

“That’s all you’re gonna say?” You ask between your teeth.

“I am sorry…” He says averting your eyes.

“Being sorry won’t cut it.” You hiss. “Can you at least tell me why you want to break up with me?”

He lowers his head, pursing his lips. He seems to gather his thoughts but doesn’t say anything.

“So?!” You demand impatiently.

“It’s… I can’t tell you.”

“What do you mean you can’t tell me? You don’t even know why you don’t want to be with me anymore?!”

“It’s complicated, we just can’t. He-”He closes his mouth immediately like he said too much.

“He? Who’s he and what does it have to do with our situation?” You demand, gripping his green uniform in your fists.

He shakes his head and detaches your hands from him.

“Listen, the only thing you need to know is that it can’t work between us and I don’t want to see you anymore.” He hits you with.

You swallow your tears, fighting the urge to slap his face.

“Fine. Go! Go away from me, you pathetic sad little man!”

You spin and walk away, leaving him alone behind. You gulp with difficulty.

Here goes another one of your lovers, and once again you don’t know why. They all served you different reasons but it doesn’t take to be a genius to realize they lied to you.

You hug yourself with a shiver. You need a warm presence, you need a friend.

And you know exactly who.

----------------------------------------------------------

“I do not think he was worth your time.” Thrawn simply says, eyes focused on his datapad, seated at his desk.

You open up one of his secret bottles with your teeth and take large sips of the drink, waiting for alcohol to take effect.

“I hate men!” You let out.

“No you do not, you hate him in particular.” He corrects

“Him and all the bastards that left me before!” You rage. “Why do they all leave me?”

He doesn’t respond, only observing you sitting in front of him and placing your feet on his desk.

“Tell me, you who is a man, is there something that repulsing about me that they all want to leave me?” You ask.

“You mean other than your atrocious manners? I do not know.” He casually answers.

You wince and take out your feets of his desk. 

What are you doing wrong? What is wrong with you? You count on your fingers.

“The fifth! That’s the fifth one to leave me in the dirt like that!” You exclaim.

“I am truly sorry.”

“Pffffff! I’ve never seen you with someone, I don’t even know if you know the pain to get rejected like that…” You mumble.

“It does not prevent me from sympathizing.” 

“Thank you…” You sigh “Sometimes I think I will just switch teams and look for what the women have to offer.” 

“You are drunk.”

“So what? I am still human! I still need love and tenderness! But since no man wants to take the job, I will need to find them elsewhere!”

You lay your head on the cold metal desk, sighing defeated.

“Are you sure you looked everywhere? Maybe someone else is interested in you?” He tries.

You purse your lips. You would still be interested in him if he wasn’t married to his job. Long ago, back at the Academy you would have climbed Thrawn like a tree if he just asked, if only he wanted it… But he never wanted it, never expresses any attraction towards anyone. You holded bets with Eli about who could ravish his heart but he turned down everyone who tried their chance with him. 

The man is cold blooded.

And it would be terribly sexy of him if it meant you would not get rejected for sure.

So you buried that dream and went on to other relationships. As a friend you kept him updated on your love life, and you were met with the same mutism each time, but he listened nonetheless and comforted you in your hard times.

At least he’s a good friend. Too bad he can’t be more.

“If it can console you, you will not see him anytime soon : I assigned him on a mission away from the Chimaera.” Thrawn informs you.

You sniff. At least you will not have to cross paths with him everyday. You let out a tired moan, exhausted by all these emotions. You just want to find someone and keep them, is that too much to ask?

You feel a gentle hand on your shoulder.

“Everything is going to be fine.” He speaks softly, you raise your head to meet his burning eyes.

“Really?” You ask with a little voice.

“I am sure of it, soon you will find someone. In a way or another. Maybe they are closer than you think.”

You let out something between a snarl and a laugh.

“I didn’t know you were sentimental, Thrawn. I saw you more as a stoic, practical person.” You take another gulp of alcohol.

“I’m gonna end up as an old, decrepit lady with her Lothcats!” You shout, disgusted.

He slowly shakes his head with a patient expression.

“You will not. You are a great person, full of good qualities. I cannot imagine a world where you would end up alone.”

You finish the bottle in one go. Well, since your exile on Peridea, your options are severely limited, so the risk of ending alone is up there!

“If only you were right, Thrawn!” You slam the bottle on the desk. “Why is life so unfair!!!”

“I am sure there are more unfair situations.” He counters going back on his datapad.

“Like what?! What can be worse than being constantly rejected?!”

“Seeing someone you love being led on by unworthy people continuously. Seeing them getting destroyed slowly and not being able to reach them or confess.” He says casually, eyes on the screen.

You bite your lips.

Okay.

Maybe that is worse.

But still.

“Well they should get up to it and confess!” You shout, passably drunk.

“That is not that easy… What if the other person does not share the same sentiment?”

“They should try anyway!They owe the truth to them and themself!”

“What a simplistic way to see things.” He shakes his head slowly.

“If your made-up situations were not depressing too…” You pout.

His gaze slides on you, looking you in the eyes. You are too drunk to read his expression correctly.

“What?” You ask abruptly.

“Nothing. I am just looking forward to the moment when I will have to escort you to your room, seeing how drunk you already are.”

“I am not that drunk!” You retort.”See?”

You raise up to prove your point and immediately lose balance.

“Oops!”

You hear him sigh deeply as you stand back on your feet.

“Let us put you to bed before you unleash chaos.” He states.

He comes to your side and passes one of your arms around his shoulders for support.

“Thank you.” You mutters.

“Let us not talk about it.” 

He silently walks you to your room. You follow the best you can with wobbly legs and dizziness. You hold on to him to not lose your balance again, pressing yourself against him. You smell his musk on his warm skin.

He smells so good…

You refrain yourself from licking his ear, that is so tempting, to tease him a bit…

But that would be sexual harassment, girl.

So no.

You just look at him with a blissful smile and glazed eyes.

“What?” He gently asks.

“You’re very tall… You must break so many hearts!”

“I have my success, but I do not see how this is relevant.”

“Oh excuse me mister. How are your ankles?” you snort, laughing.

“They are fine. Are you jealous, maybe?”

“Well, yes!You have so many options and I have none. It’s disheartening.”

“You dramatize. I am sure a heart already beats for you.” He tries to comfort you.

“Well why doesn’t it make itself known?” You shout. “I am single now, my heart waits to be taken.”

“Maybe… They are not ready to confess. Maybe they are scared of your reaction.”

“Oh come on! I only bite in bed! I won’t eat them!” You sigh deeply. “If they were more like you…”

He turns his head slightly to you, with surprise.

“If they were more like me?” He invites

“Well, they would have more courage! They would have the guts to confess! You surely would not let a poor woman in this deplorable state. Would you…” You pout. 

He sighs.

“Are you taking me for a knight in shining armor?”

“Why not? You’re quite the gentleman!” You grin. “See? You offered to walk me back for my safety. That is what knights in shining armors do!”

“I think it is more a force of habits by now. How many times have I had to carry you to your room drunk like that since the Academy?”

“Numerous time!”You cheer. “But we were ensigns, things were simpler by then…”

Back then you thought you had a chance with him.

“I am still here to help you. Things did not change that much.” He counters.

No, indeed. Your chances are still at 0%, nothing really changed.

“Yes… At least you are here, to help me back on my feet each time I fall.” You leave a big peck on his cheek. “My knight in shining armor…”

He remains silent till you reach your cabin, he slips you inside and helps you lay down on your bed. He helps you get rid of your shoes.

“You should change clothes.” He informs you.

You bury your face in your pillow.

“No, I’m too tired…” You protest.

“Do not be such a child.” He softly chastises, coming to sit on the edge of your bed, a hand on your shoulder.

“I’m so tired… So tired to be left behind… Will you be here with me? Will you be here for me?” You mumble more to yourself than him.

“I will be here.” He squeezes your shoulder delicately before straightening his back and facing the door, folding his hand. “I will always be here for you. To help you lift you up, even if you do not want me.” 

He sighs deeply, gathering his courage.

“You know, I may not have been totally honest with you lately.” He starts. “You will not like it, I know, but I had a hand in your rejections. I… Cannot stomach the thought of you with another man. It is going to sound strange to you but… I love you. Since we met at the Academy, I have always been fond of you, your energy, your enthusiasm, your… terrible manners…” He chuckles a bit, eyes focused on his hands. What is up with him? Maybe your kiss emboldens him “Yes. It may be stupid on my part but I always had this hope that we would be a thing one day, you and I. I am aware revealing this while you are drunk and vulnerable emotionally is low on my part, but… I just hope you will not hold it against me.”

He turns towards you, fully prepared to receive a slap in the face and find you snoring, fully sleeping.

You heard none of his confession… 

Maybe for the best, he thinks.

“You are impossible.”

He pulls the cover over you and kisses your cheek.

“Goodnight, my love.”

And he leaves you for the night

--------------------------------------------------

“You have found someone? Already?” He asks.

His voice is steady but if he was human he would be as white as a sheet. A good thing he is a Chiss.

“Yep!” You giggle.

You came to him during one of your breaks, sharing the good news.

“He’s a tie pilot!One of your best, if you want my totally unbiased opinion.” You share it like a secret with him.

He remains still and stoic, but hidden behind his desk his hands take a fistfull of his uniform, digging his nails in the fabric. 

Again?!

How many rivals will he have to get rid of?

Why can’t you notice him?

“My congratulations.” He continues. “You must be relieved.”

He is completely insincere. This news is eating him alive.

“Yes! Pretty much!” You cheer, typing away to your lover on your comlink “I may not end up like an old sad lady finally.” You smile brightly at him.

It stabs him in the heart. You should smile like that because of him! Because you are with him! Not because of some other man… He bites his cheek until he can taste the blood in his mouth, preventing him from talking.

“I will present him to you! You’ll see he’s such a sweet guy, you will love him, I’m sure!” You continue, blissfully unaware of his inner turmoil. “Eli and Karyn already knew him.”

They know him?

Them to whom he confessed his true sentiments?

Them who knows the truth?

“I will gladly meet him. He sounds like a great man.” He lies.

He will put him back in his place as soon as they cross paths. He will make him regret laying eyes on you. 

He will not tolerate it!

He simply can’t!

“Oh, you are so sweet!” You kiss him on the cheek again, fluttering his heart, he knows it means nothing, you kiss Eli’s cheek too. But he can’t help but linger in the touch of your lips. “He’s very excited to finally meet the Grand Admiral Thrawn himself, even if it’s just as a friend of his girlfriend.” You coo.

“What is his name?” He innocently inquires.

You gave him his name, permitting him to search his file, his screen hidden from your gaze. 

If that fool thinks he can have you, free of consequences, he is severely mistaken. He scrolls through the file gritting his teeth as you continue talking about your new lover.

He hates him already.

“Should you not go back to work?” He suddenly cuts you off.

You check your chrono, your shift started ten minutes ago.

“Oops! I tend to rumble when I speak about him.” You giggle.

You rise from your seat to kiss his cheek again.

“Thank you for supporting me when I was alone and sad.” You thank him.

“You are welcome.” 

He hoped to confess to you during that time, but you were quicker than anticipated and he didn’t find the courage to face you. It always surprises him how the prospect of talking to you terrifies him to his core, how he’s afraid to make a mistake and make you hate him, or worse, you picking up his sentiments and confront him for it. His heart could not take it.

“Bye, see you later!” You salute him as you exit the room.

He turns back his head to the screen, scrutinizing the face of his new rival.

He will finish some files and have a polite discussion with him.

----------------------------------------

You yawn and stretch out your spine. Another good day of work done, you can’t wait to throw yourself in the arms of your sweetheart. You deserve it!

You are heading towards his cabin with a light head and some sleep in the eyes when you see him at the end of the corridor in a discussion with Thrawn.

Looks like he was faster than you and met him himself!They are deeply focused on their discussion and none of them realize you are approaching. You notice Thrawn hard and authoritarian expression and the one distressed of your sweetheart. You hope everything is okay…

You accelerate until you start hearing their discussion and hear something that stops you dead in your tracks.

“You will break up with her. It is an order.” Thrawn says with an icy cold tone.

“But… Why, Grand admiral?” Your lover asks, desesperate. “Why would you mingle with her affairs?”

“The reasons are mine and mine alone. You on your hand will obey me if you do not want to visit the cells of the Chimaera.”

“But for what offense? We are just dating, fraternization isn’t prohibited, we are doing nothing wrong…” He tries to negotiate with a shaken voice.

“You will obey my orders and leave her alone. You do not deserve to know why.”

“One moment!” You interject “What’s the meaning of this?!” You shout

They both turn their head to you in surprise. You lover looks desperate when Thrawn looks horrified for a split second, recovering his stoic mask just as quick.

“Thrawn! Why would you order him to leave me?! For what possible reasons?!”

“(Y/n)...” He starts.

“Who do you think you are to order my lover like that, who are you to tamper with my love life?!” You poke him, furiously.

“(Y/n), calm down.” 

“No, I’m not calming down! Why would you do that?! I trusted you! I thought you were my friend!I confided in you!” 

He considers you in silence as you await for explanations. He looks so haughty and cold. He finally sighs, lowering his shoulders.

“I will explain to you. Please follow me.”

You both walk away from your lover, looking at you leaving with dangling arms, not understanding the situation. You enter Thrawn’s office and you cross your arms on your chest, grounding yourself on your two feet as the door close behind you.

“So?” You demand between your teeth.

“Please sit down.” He invites you softly.

“No! Answer me!” 

“I will. But please, sit down.” 

You shake your head furiously and sit down with a gruff snarl.

“Happy? Now speak!”

“Let me start by saying I am sorry, even if you do nit want to hear it.”

“Indeed I don’t! Bloody hell, what is wrong with you?!” you implode.

He sits down in front of you and look at you sadly, joining his hands on his desk like he’s about to start negotiations.

“I would rather have done things differently, but it looks like I missed my opportunity.” He calmly says. “Will you permit me to explain without being interrupted?”

You consider him for a second before snarling a “yes” between your teeth.

“Good. You probably understood, but this is not the first time I asked one of your dear ones to leave you. I had a hand in each of you last five breaks up. No. Even more than that. These bad habits started back at the Academy. You have no idea how many people I have turned away from you.”

You can’t believe what you’re hearing! This started back at the Academy?! Why would he do that?! When you think you called this traitor a friend, when you think you found him attractive…

“I methodically forced them out of your life as soon as I detected signs of attraction in them. I could not stomach it…”

You growl lowly. That’s not because he can live without love that he has the right to impose it on you! What was he thinking, for Maker’s sake!

“I am going to sound stupid, but I simply could not tolerate seeing you happy with someone. It was unthinkable, so I drove them away. I know it ended up in you suffering their loss, but for those fleeting moments you would take support in my presence and ask me to be in your life. And in those moments, I was simply happy. You only seemed to notice me in those moments.” He continues to spew his nonsense.

The more he explains, the more you are lost. What is he saying?!

“So I started to revel in these instances. If it was the only way for me to be in your life, I would do it every time. It was incredibly toxic, I am conscious of it. Eli and Karyn told me too. But I could not help it.”

Oh great, now Eli and Karyn are in it too! You can’t trust anyone around here!

“I am also conscious that it was highly improper of me to do all that. But it was the only way for me to make you look at me, so I choose this option each time to have you lean on my shoulder… I want to say I am sorry.”

You’re afraid to understand now…

“I have no right to say that, but… I love you.”

You remain silent, eyes in eyes.

It’s like you have been struck by lightning.

You can only gulp in complete disbelief.

“I love you(Y/n). For a long time now. I never found the courage to tell you, I was so afraid to have my heart broken I chose to break yours instead.” He murmurs almost to himself “I would understand if you do not want to see me anymore.”

Your mouth and throat are so dry, no sounds can escape.

You can only open your mouth agape with the most distressed expression.

“Thank you for not interrupting me.”

Your eyes are wide open while you hug yourself.

You can’t make sense of what he is saying.

Did he just…

“Please say something…” He tries.

A shudder comes and shakes you, your stomach twisted in knots.

“I…” You mutter “You… Why?”

He seems to lower his head in shame, but his gaze never leaves yours.

“I had… Have that weird possession complex towards you. I know I have no right over you, but I just could not support seeing you in the arms of someone else than me. So I did the most stupid thing possible out of fear. It was incredibly selfish, and I am ready to bear the consequences of my actions.”

You cower over yourself, at loss for words.

“I just wanted you for myself. Hearing you say “I love you” in my ear. Having the privilege to hold your hand and call you mine. I just… was delusional. This is no way to treat a loved one.”

You can’t believe what your hearring.

Some years ago you would have been elated to hear that….

But in some twisted way you are?

What is wrong with you? He just confessed sabotaging your love life for years!

But your heart flutters at those words, at being desired by this man.

“Why didn’t you simply confess to me?” 

“I was absolutely terrified.”

“You? You can be terrified of something?” You almost mock.

“I am terrified of many things.. You rejecting me is one of them.” He humbly admits.

“I… I am touched by your sentiments, but… You can’t just do that!”

“I know. Believe me, I know…”

“You would have said that to me  years ago I would have been so happy, but-”

He suddenly raises his head like electrified.

“What did you just said?”

“Huh… If you would have said it earlier…”

He looks at you with eyes full of hope, embolden by your mute admission.

“Are you saying you share my sentiments?”

“I’m saying… Hugh! I am saying that before I would have been happy to hear your confession. But I can’t just forget what you just did!”

“But today, (Y/n)? What does your heart say today?” He insists.

You try to gather your thoughts as he presses you.

“Today, I…”

He takes your hand and squeezes it, eyes full of hardor.

“Today I am happy too, but…”

You see his pupils dilating, clearly pleased by your confession. A light smile comes adorning his expression.

“Is it true? Is it possible?”

“I… I am immensely flattered by your confession, but I can’t forgive you like that.” You temper.

“If you ever forgive me, would I have a chance with you?”

You purse your lips, your thoughts are all over the place and he keeps pressuring you.

“I don’t know… Maybe?”

His smile grows larger and he takes your hand to his lips to kiss it.

“I am glad, (Y/n). So glad…”

“Wait, hold on! I never said I forgave you!” You protest.

“No, but you did not negate that I had a chance. That is enough for me.”

He looks at you with fire in his eyes, like when he is strategizing one of his campaigns.

“I will fight for you, (Y/n). I will make you forgive me and win your heart.”

He is dead serious.

“Wait! I am still taken. You won’t break up my couple that easily.”

“I will not need to. I will make you choose me. I will show you what true devotion looks like and you will come to me yourself!” 

“You still have a lot to make yourself forgiven!” You try to tame his expectations.

But he looks at you with resolution you only see when he fight an enemy.

“I will face any trials you see fit, I will make amends. And you will finally realize I only did it for us. You will come to understand.”

You don’t know what but you feel like you awaken something that should have stayed dormant.

He seems filled with a renewed energy, ready to conquer the world, or at least you.

“I will make you happy, (Y/n). You will see…”

Now you can only pray you will be able to resist his advances.

What else can you do anyway?

@bluechiss @thrawnalani @justanothersadperson93 @al-astakbar @thrawnspetgoose @readinglistfics @elise2174 @debonaire-princess @twilekchiss @pencil-urchin  @ineedazeezee @mssbridgerton @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching @Cortisolcosplay

#thrawn #grand admiral thrawn #mitth’raw’nuruodo #thrawn x reader #thrawn x f!reader #thrawn x you #fanfic #vibratingskull

[prototypelq]

if i may ask, what's your favorite fictional horsie? (ask inspired by the recent darksiders posting, which btw has some awesome-looking horses :D)

MUTUAL YOU HAVE STEPPED ON A LANDMINE. or more like a pressure plate that is wired to a nuclear landmine under Me.

oh no I am forced to confront my sins over unhinged animal obsessions now, okay

(MAGIC HORSEGIRL TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE)

sidenote: while writing this I realised that the ask implied any kind of fantasy horse, but I'm now shoulder-deep in gaming horses tangent soooooo lol sorry not sorry. as for fantasy outside of games I really like the idea of Sleipnir, or any other kind of multi-legged horse, Ghost Rider flaming spirit horse is also super cool. Any horse-like creature that is predatory is freakishly awesome. Additional points for adding horns, scales, or swapping hooves for split-fingered/artiodactyl-like legs.

To be honest, I wish this ask was harder to answer than it is, because truth be told, there are very few games with horses. Decent horse animation is even less common than actually good horses, which is another factor that makes me very sad and harder to enjoy these mounts. Additionally, most of the games use horses as... 'car stand-ins' basically, there's very rarely anything uniquely Horse TM about the mounts, and usually they feel like glorified speed booster with questionable animations.

(spoiler: no, rdr2 does not have good horse animation, I have looked with literal scientific lens at thas game, consulted with different horsegirl enthusiasts about it, saw literally every available to public lecture on everything-horse-developed for it, and have concluded that, horse animation is overly complicated with little to-no noticable results, as are most things with that game. more on this later)

I'll obviously be forced to come back to RDR2 topic, but shelf it for now. Here be some of my fav horsies in games, not in any particular order (except RDR2 which will be discussed below).

Darksiders is pretty much a DMC-cousin series but with horses and this makes it so cool. The designers of horses for the Riders of the Apocalypse have gone out of their way to make all the Riders and their mounts look absolutely stunning. Despair looks both awesome and riveting and is my personal fave, Rampage has Mane Magic TM same as his rider Fury, Mayhem looks really cool in that armor, but, of course, Ruin is the posterchild for the series, and rightfully so!

Ruin is built absolutely true to his name. This horse looks like it runs on V8 infernal engine and pisses nuclear monster energy. He has fangs. His hooves scorch the ground underneath. This horse has the muscle mass of a red giant sun about to go supernova. He looks absolutely insane, the only thing you could fear more than this horse in a room is the person who is controlling him. So yes, an extremely fitting mount for War. (Ruin also has awesome mane physics, much appreciated)

Sadly, out of four Darksiders games, there are horse levels only 2 of them - those being the first two games (3 and Genesis are good, Genesis especially, but they both distanced themselves from 'big maps with dungeons' style maps, so horses are not really needed. Genesis has levels you can ride in, but the horses are not really needed in it, still, they are a welcome addition, especially with fans getting the final fourth horse design). Darksiders I and II are very much horsegirlgamer games, as both have Mounted Bossfights, which are BADASS, the Guardian fight in DS2 especially. Both really make you feel like the mythic Rider of the Apocalypse, they are amazing.

Darksiders II also gets an important mention from me for having The Best Trot Animation In Gaming To This Date. The horse trot is fluid, looks very expressive and it's clear Despair slows a lot of this, so it's not his preferred gait for riding, but the main highlight is Death's animation.

Most of the games are lazy with trot, as one of the riding techniques for handling it is just...sitting in the saddle aggressively (I mean it literally, as horse movement on trot is designed to throw you off, so technique number one is basically pushing yourself back into the saddle to counteract this). So the games are usually lazy and just glue the rider to the saddle to show this. However, the second, easier really, way to ride on trot is posting, which is standing up and down in rhythm with the horse's leg movement. Problem with trot is that you need to relearn it for each individual horse, as they all have different builds, leg lengh, breed, etc. With one horse it's easier to stay sitting, with another it would be impossible, but posting will be easy to do, and with some horses you can't do either, so your only hope is holding on until you change speed and gait.

Death's movement in this trot animation is so fluid, so minimal and effortless - it's natural for him. He is in complete harmony with Despair, and the way he posts shows exactly that. 10/10 best trot animation ever, fight me.

Okay so, from a very much deserved highlight, to a not really deserved one - Dragon Age Inquisition. I'll say from the get-go, the mounts in this game suck, they don't even alter your speed of movement! They are completely useless. You could rip a minecraft horse in their place and it would feel better to control, be more useful and have better animation than DAI native mount system. That said, their designs are so cool, Dracolisks especially.

Fun fact, even the game's Horsemaster pretty much throws hands at seeing these things. You know how a normal horse when mean transformes into a 400 kilo beast with immense bite force and body mass that can crush you? Well, dracolisks don't look that heavy, but they also seem to be ready to hunt you for sport and giggles. 10/10 intense factor, they look awesome and as a supposed leader of a world-saving institution you look very impressive while riding them (and frighten 99% of the population). (it's also hilarious to imagine a Maximus-Flynn situation from Tangled between these temperamental beasts and your poor party members or love interest)

Thankfully, most of my mutuals have been acquired pretty recently, meaning, after my Big Horizons Phase xD I really love HZD, and one of the neat things about it is actually horses!

Horizon ZD is the game that has the best controlling horses out of all the games I've played (yes, even rdr2 loses to it for a big reason I will elaborate later on), and the formula of it's success is very fun to look into: it lies in three very important factors: horse brain, player controls and animation, all of which have been solved simply, yet with grace.

HZD has made sure that your chosen mount has it's own pathfinding system, which does not turn off when the player starts riding the creature, so you can, and I almost quote the devs here - you can ride into a patch of woods on high speed, leg go of your controller, and the horse will avoid collision on its own. Isn't it just great when your supposed animal has it's own pathfinding made to simulate brain activity and their feeling of self-preservation. Point two: controls. The most important aspect of HZD mount controls is that - you keep controlling Aloy, the moment she starts riding there is no magical control transition in favour of your mount. There is no 'go forward' button, even pushing the stick forward works only for walk. You keep controlling Aloy, who is now riding on top of a horse-like-machine, so to go faster you press the button for her to kick the horse into next gear. To stop or slow down, you don't use sticks and don't let go of 'go forward button', that will actually do nothing, instead you need to press the button to make Aloy hold the cords of the machine closer. Under the surface, every game's horses are just 'reskined cars', but details like this make the player feel different, make you feel like your controls don't magically transcend to the animal your controlled character is on top of. This detail is small, but it's impact is very big, I assure you. Point three: animation. HZD devs did an awesome animation trick for the running cycle of Aloy and the horses, as those two are the ones players see the most of, and they are the first ones to get repetitive and boring for the player. Basically, animators did three variations of run cycle with different weight distribution (model veers sideways and steers back into weight neutral position), then coded in a system to randomly blend bits of these run animations together. The result is a partially randomised run animation, made out of fleshed-out hand-made ones, so it always looks good, quite diverse, and is not as repetitive. (I wish I remembered the specific talk where devs explained this, but there are so many of them, all fascinating btw, and its been a few years so sorry no source for you)

Two honourable mentions for the games I have not played myself, but they really deserve it when we're talking about horsegirlgames: Zelda BOTW and Shadow of the Colossus. These games have horses right out of every horsegirl's dreams - they are big, their manes long and gorgeous, their run animation so cartoonishly expressive yet graceful, it's mesmerising. Certified horsegamergirl games.

Honestly, it's impossible to not fall in love with them (unless you don't have a platform to run either of these, ahaha, fuck console wars).

And now. Now for the black sheep of my horsegames list. RDR2.

Disclaimer: I have spent way too much time in this game. 'got Zoologist' kind of too much time. While I will be critical, the game is certainly an acquired taste, and there have been enough people singing praises to it and never having the issues I got after putting hundreds of hours into it. I had a great time, which turned very sour after these hundreds of hours. Some players keep loving this game forever, some despise it from the start. Play on your own to formulate a personal opinion and don't defer to any of these camps.

RDR2 is a western movie through and through, and by that I mean that the game is extremely pretty on the outside, but has nothing substantial on the insde. This illusion held for me for long enough, but I was much saddened by peeking behind the curtain, and seeing what I found there. Again, this is a personal issue, it doesn't mean the game is bad or good, but my dissapointement is tied pretty much directly to how the game handles horses, since, y'know, this is supposendly 'the ultimate horsegirl game'.

The sad truth is that RDR2 horses are exactly 'reskinned cars', which is the trap that renders most of gaming horses so so so boring, but the illusion the game creates holds strong for a long while, plus the personification of your horsie (saddle, mane customisation, etc.) actually strenghtens that illusion big time.

I have pointed out what HZD did right for horses to feel so good thoroughly for a reason, said reason is: RDR2 got every point on that list wrong.

Let me show you some examples of RDR2 horse pathfinding.

I chose these two specific clips for a reason - both are prime examples of exactly how lobotomised RDR2 horses are, but in different ways. First clip is user error (besides the fact that no horse could ever run on railways but I digress) - I have been enjoying the scenery too much, and the stick angle proved too much, so me and my beloved horse fell straight to our deaths off the side of that railway. I think it's pretty self-explanatory that irl horses are very self-preservation centered animals, and they don't just fall down random pits. If the RDR2 horses had kept their AI pathfinding running while the player controls them, this simple user error could have been negated - as the pathfinding system would quickly flash a 'don't fucking run into a pit', keep input from registering and the horse would just follow the side of the road without tumbling down. Which, in gamer's eyes would also roleplay as horse having it's own brains. The second example is even weirder - I've been using the 'cinematic mode', which means I put down the controller, and the horse is following the road to my chosen destination on his own, so, y'know, this should be a prime example of horse pathfinding. Wrong again! Granted, that weird woman is some sort of random event, she is not usually there, nor are there barrels, but if the object has a collison parameter it should have been freakin registered and the horse was supposed to jump over it.

So yeah, RDR2 horses are completely lobotomised to any sense of navigation, this has been likely done in favour of more direct player control and easier cinematic setups.

Point two: controls. This one is actually mixed, and I'll start with the good thing for a change. The good thing is RDR2 is literally the only game to allow for lateral movement for mount, in short, this allows you to turn around your horse clockwise while remaining in one place, basically spinning, on trot and gallop too no less! If you try the control inputs for this in any other game, you will end up circling around a set point, and not spinning in place. Which, very cool actually, and yeah the opportunity to do this feels good. Another great detail is Handling stat - which is, how responsive is your horse to your inputs (ex. more or less maneuverable, time to turn after input, how much you mash X to speed up to another gait), which all feel very distinct. Arabians are known for having exquisitely tight handling, you need only to lightly tap the button for them to listen to you, in contrast, work or draft horses will make live for your big thumb a living hell, as they need to be kicked a lot of times to do literally anything. This idea of changing character controls for each horse is very very good, and this I will gladly praise.

On the other hand RDR2 horse controls (dreadfuly). First off - your horse works based on a 'go forward' button mechanic, also the gait change is tied to it, and if you, for some reason, just 'let go' of your 'go forward button' you will after slowing down. I remember seeing a meme where the trigger and the X buttons were duck-taped to be constantly pressed on their own, and I can tell you it's not a joke. You just might need another controller after all the X mashing this game requires you to do. Just for horse controls - you mash X to go faster, you keep pushing X to remain at current speed, and the only time you let go of that button is to either mash it again, or if you want to slow down for a stop.

If you look at HZD controls explanation again, you might see just how damaging this control scheme is to the feel of your horse being an actual animal with their own head and brain, pair this controls madness with nonexistence of pathfinding, and well, RDR2 horses are justt lobotomised to a point of being a 'reskinned car'.

Last point, might be our saving grace here - animation. And, ehhhhhhhhhh, this one's positive but mixed. RDR2 devs did a great job at recognizing how different gait speeds for horses work, as well, gait is just the type of movement horse uses, it is not as strictly tied to speed as you might think. Just as you can hop down the street, or walk down the street at the same speed, trained horses can gallop at practicaly walking speed for shows (this does not work in reverse though - you cannot reach gallop speed while trotting). Game animators did their best to recognise and implement this, so the game is calculating leg movement and is blending animation when the gait-change is happening. However, what I ended up with in game, a lot of the time, is this:

I am not sure what this is caused by, I interpret this as the animation engine shrugging and going for a coffee break. This mistake is not uncommon at all, and there will be a lot of time when you see your horse 'hopping' like this with both front and back legs for a couple of seconds.

Let's just say, this is not how horses run. This is not even how they could run if they want to, or are trained to do this. Horses' entire anatomy revolves around their movement, which is built on a foundational truth that legs move in a set pattern, if that pattern is broken - horse will damage itself.

Again, this is likely just a technical issue, it appears often enough, but unless you know this is an error, you will likely sleep soundely at night. As you can see, I am not one of those people. I did not sleep soundly at night after looking into this. I have also consulted with all my horsegirl friends and a horsekeeping student over this and all of them confirmed this as an error. Still, it is very strange, that a game that bragged it has horse testicle physics down, has this blatant and frequent animation error in it.

Okay, I've thrashed RDR2 quite enough I think, the last bit I wanted to list here is another positive one. Muscle animation and animal sounds is this game are certified clinically insane. All the breathing muscle movement after cantering has been noted and animated to a golden standard, head muscle, snorting, leg muscle, all of these look insanely good. I mean literally insanely good, the animators that worked on this deserve awards.

Also, you could never say no to horse customisation. So, I wanted to wrap this monster of a post with a compilation of my RDR2 pretty horses photomoding.

#i hope this post is horsegirl enough #honestly i needed this thank you for the ask #we need more good horse games #like a lot more #(please im begging you) #give rdr2 horses the engine of hzd ones and that game could have been perfect #alas we have what we have plus lots of stupid fall compilations #horses #darksiders #darksiders 2 #shadow of the colossus #zelda botw #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #hzd #horizon zero dawn #rdr2 photomode

[thatonebylershipper]

soooooo is no one gonna talk about how ME! is so extremely byler coded

okay have fun reading this monstrosity of character analysis if you want to

so uh. mike wheeler. he genuinely thinks he is unlovable and so hard to deal with. he really really thinks that. i disagree with the not thinking part tho. hes a smart kid. when he "jumped" (i do quotations because my little pookie wookie did not jump off that cliff lil guy stepped off) off the cliff, he knew what would happen when he hit the water. (rocks. he didnt even aim for the water he just stepped off right over the rocks and he knew what would happen.)

will is absoluetly a chick magnet and mike knows that. he can see it. hell, he lives it. he knows that will is extremely attractive because he feels the attraction himself. going back to believing he is unlovable, he also doesnt think he is anywhere near good enough for will. he knows that there are probably plenty of girls lined up waiting for a chance to date will and mike thinks that will deserves way better than him.

phonegate phonegate phonegate phonegate

also yeah this bitch (affectionate) has no idea when to stop and just cant stay out of shit. he has to be right in the middle of everything. which btw isnt always a bad thing but it is often detrimental to him.

trouble on my left trouble on my right ive been facing trouble almost all my life-- okay mb i wont make cte references rn i just think its a very mike coded song because genuinely he always has trouble following him around. lil guy cannot escape the Problems and the Horrors

all i have to say about this is gay

OKAY WILL'S TURN

i saw a very interesting character analysis of mike one time talking about how he is always the one to reach out and no one ever reaches out to him. not even will. which you might be like "what are you talking about" but its true. when will tells mike about his problems or whatever is going on, mike always asks questions to try and understand better. hes always the one to reach out first. when he tried to open up however, no one does that for him. no one tries to better understand what hes saying.

ANYWAY during the rink-o-mania fight, will mentioned mike never calling him or writing to him. but did he ever reach out? or did he just expect mike to? [THIS IS NOT ME HATING ON WILL BTW. I LOVE HIM DEARLY BUT HE NEEDS TO GET HIS HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS SOMETIMES. ALSO THIS IS NOT ME BRUSHING OFF MIKES SHITTY BEHAVIOR. HE ALSO NEEDS TO GET HIS HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS SOMETIMES.] all of this connects to "i know i tend to make it about me". i dont think will means to do this, but it ends up happening over and over.

as for "i know you never get just what you see" this particular lyric makes me think of the rink-o-mania scene where angela came up to the table and took el away, but mike didnt do anything. he didnt even seem bothered by it. that is, until will showed concern for the situation. then he jumped into protection mode. when will revealed to mike that el had been lying to him, his reaction was to call bullshit because why would she do that?? he doesnt get what he sees. what he saw was el being taken out to the floor by her friends. but thats not what he got. what he got was el being taken away by her bullies. will knows that mike doesnt always get what he sees.

i feel like this lyric could be purely flirtatious and tbh i can imagine will saying this to mike just to see him blush. "i will never bore you baby." cue mike turning into a tomato. idk this lyric is silly i dont really have anything to pair with it

self explanatory. they had a fight in the rain. and then mike ran after will and called his name. of course will never wants to see mike walk away; hes in love.

idk why that one got big but whatever. again, gay. because theyre not like the others. but the winter/summer thing: there are all sorts of dynamics that all have the same vibe. black cat/golden retreiver boyfriends, moon/sun boyfriends. its all blue and yellow iykwim. winter/summer is just another one of those. mike is winter and will is absoluetly his summer

"and i promise that nobodys gonna love you like me-hee-heee" nope, no one is ever ever gonna love either of them the way they love each other. they were made for each other and not only do they need each other, they want each other which is honestly more important. if they didnt want each other so badly, the ship would be no better than milkvan. because milkvan needed each other, but they did not want each other. thats why the ship is bones. it doesnt work out if they dont want each other.

#byler #get character analyzed bitch #byler x taylor swift songs forever #ME! #taylor swift

[mamamittens]

If we have a child!Reader from “Oh sweet child of mine” what will be for them, how they will act around all animals, especially Mao the first time he/she show up. I can see all the chaos and cuteness around them with all kind, dangerous, and calms animals. I just can see all the White beard pirates trying to “protect” little reader from “harm” but instead all animals are just like “you are my friend now/you are mine now.” And trying to take them 😂

Pocket sized for convenience reader will find themselves played with and cuddled a lot more, particularly when they probably shouldn't be. Several dogs bit their 'partners' as well as cat scratches and Birdy dive bombs. That animal charisma just gets kicked up a half dozen notches.

Every time they sit down Stefan or Kotatsu, sometimes both, is right there to lay with them. Nap times are cuddle piles.

A lot of this particular hug for Mao but Mao's way bigger lol. I imagine they get low-key picked up and someone has to scramble to pull them off before Mao just... Dips out with the kiddo. Both are pouting.

Marco offers firebird hugs instead and is low-key wounded when reader hesitates.

Ultimately Mao isn't deep fried because it's very obvious that animals simply love child reader on sight (insert joke about Marco being very attached here) and reader is soooooo happy to see Mao everytime they appear, as well as their family. (Mao's the favorite sea king but you can't tell anyone).

A quick way to earn reader's favor is asking about animals and they'll gladly spend well over an hour rambling animal facts and their favorite things while being held without a fuss.

They gotta watch out for the news coo tho, cause they're strong enough and fast enough to get a good distance away without being noticed. Watch Marco have an intense staring contest everytime the paper is delivered. See how huffy he gets if they ever meet Big News Morgan and fawn over how fluffy he is. Just, real casual transformation before batting kiddo with his feathers as he sloooowly slides them away from Morgan. Who may or may not be utterly charmed and convinced they'd be a great junior reporter. Who'd wanna lie to face like that 🥺?

Real tears when they meet Chopper cause it's so damn cute but they can't get distracted or Luffy will run off with them. Reader is more thrilled that Chopper is dead ass a reindeer rather than a human transformed and Marco feels put out but can't be mad cause like... It's so damn cute. They're just so smol

Silly goofy thoughts. Ngl, y'all are bullying me real hard to write a child version and I ain't even mad.

#mittens answers #oh sweet child of mine

[cthonyxa]

I drew this picture of Cam (human on the right) and Aster (axolotl anthro on the left) not long after I did the concept art for the Transcendent Trio. While Cam is friends with all the Nightingales, she and Aster are particularly close. Aster's the youngest of the group (currently planned to be 15 at the start of the series), while Cam recently turned 17. I'm still working out the details of their friendship, but one thing they bond over is (of course) video games.

From the start, Aster was concieved as a non-binary, intersex person (46,XX/46,XY with ovotesticular syndrome). They are best described as chaotic good. And, although they are definitely an annoying little gremln, they are also energetic and overall a very bubbly, happy, and likable person. Of all the family, they are the most in touch with their feelings and, as such, are quick to jump in to mediate disputes. They also tend to be a bit naive and can be too trusting, which can get them into hot water sometimes. I'm also leaning towards having them be a vtuber as a hobby, but that idea is still underbaked.

Cam has been around since the "I should do a romance novel series!" days, so she has gone through a lot of major changes. Her age, in particular, has changed several times, only settling once I got the Transcendent Trio timeline mostly worked out. She's autistic with tech stuff as a major special interest (I know, it's an overused trope at this point but I'm also a huge tech nerd soooooo.....) and fashion as another. She tends to be cynical, slow to trust, and quick to point out problems (though she is often just as quick to point out solutions to said problems). She struggles on a daily basis to avoid SIWOTI (Someone Is Wrong On The Internet), because sometimes the healthiest thing you can do for yourself is to just let someone be wrong (preferably far, far away from you).

These characters will continue to be in flux until I actually start writing/drawing the comic, so please let me know what you think! If you have any suggestions or critiques, I'd love to hear it!!

#art #original art #digital art #anthro #anthro art #furry #furry art #axolotl #intersex character #nonbinary character #autistic character #transcendent trio #ashmont vigilantes

[why-what-no]

hi i really wanna request a billy hargrove x fem reader, where she just falls out of love with him (she didnt fall for anyone else), and it doesnt really affect her but it affects billy alot (i wanna see sad billy so bad.) basically based off the quote “i dont love you anymore, goodbye”. i wanna see billy SOOOOOO pussy whipped, like hes so so so inlove with her 🤗 thank you so much

Don’t Love You

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Warning: sad boi hours

Notes: Here you go! Sorry this took a while, I’m in a bit of a slump atm. But god, this was really easy for me to write because honestly, relatable. Which is depressing, but I’m glad I could put it to use to write this.

Part two

Billy had some feeling inside of a him, an anxious pit in his stomach. He’s know something was wrong with his girlfriend for a while now, but… she wasn’t saying anything.

When he said “anything”, he meant it. (Y/N) had started spending more time with friends and now he barely saw her. Normally, Billy would cut his losses, go talk to some other girl. But… he couldn’t stop thinking. Did he do something? Was there someone else? (That thought in particular made his stomach churn)

He couldn’t stand it, so within an hour he was outside her house.

“Billy?” He heard her, turning around so he could look at her. He loved looking at her. “Billy, what are you doing here?”

“I’m not allowed to want to see my girlfriend?” He joked, but almost froze when he saw her bristle at the word ‘girlfriend’.

“I.. I was just at Nancy’s.” She said. Billy tried to interpret her tone. Was it an explanation? An excuse? Just the first awkward thing that she could think to say?

He missed the time, only a week or so again, when they could speak about everything. When they knew exactly what their lives were like.

“I need to talk to you.” He finally said after a moment of unbearable silence where (Y/N) was fidgeting in front of him.

The fidgeting disappeared, and she got still. “Okay.” Her tone shifted. He expected her to be nervous, but she just sounded… expectant. “We can talk inside.”

***

She sat down on her couch, looking up at him. “So?” She asked him.

“I…” He said, beginning to get a little frustrated with his girlfriend. “What’s going on with you.”

“What do you mean?” She asked, but he wasn’t fooled. Her expression was crestfallen when he had asked her that.

And now he was even more frustrated. “You know what I mean. We never spend any time together, you’re always with your friends. You’ve barely spoke to me this week!” He had tried to avoid raising his voice… But when he was finally letting his feelings out he couldn’t help himself.

He regretted it when he saw (Y/N) flinch, the idea he scared her truly painful for him.

“I’m sorry.” She responded. “I just…”

“Is there someone else?” He was disgusted with how pathetic his voice sounded. If it was anyone else he would be furious, but with her it just felt like he was begging her to tell him there wasn’t.

And she did. “No!” (Y/N) exclaimed. “Of course not. You know I wouldn’t do that!”

She sighed, rubbing her hands. “I though you were going to do this first.”

“What?” He asked, and then scoffed when he realized what she was saying. “You thought… you wanted me to break up with you?”

“I’m sorry. But, I just.” She slumped on her couch under his disbelieving stare. “It’s not your fault, I just don’t feel anything romantic for you anymore.”

“Just like that?” His voice was almost a whisper. “You can do that?” His throat was dry, and he could feel himself starting to tear up. He forced the feeling down as he waited for a response.

“I’m sorry.” She did sound sorry, but she also sound like a weight had been taken off her chest. Billy, alternatively, felt like that weight had been thrown onto him.

She got up, walking to her door. “I thought it would be easier for you if you thought it was your idea to break up.”

“So you just avoided me?” He asked, starting to leave. Not wanting her to see how hurt he was.

“And I… I thought with some distance I could change how I felt, go back to normal.” Her confession made him feel almost empty. “But… I don’t love you anymore. Sorry.”

He laughed bitterly. “Amazing.” He said, sarcastically. Anger was the only thing he allowed himself to feel. “This has been great. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye.” She said softly as he stormed off.

***

He slammed his hand on the dashboard as soon as he got in the car. “Fuck!” He yelled, feeling the tears starting to stream down his face.

Part of him wanted to back inside, to pathetically beg her to take him back. If she just gave him another chance, he was sure he could make her love him like he loved her.

Another part of him wanted to make her regret this. To find some other girl and make her jealous. Prove that he was too good for her. But he knew he wasn’t. And he knew that he wouldn’t be able to be with another girl without thinking about (Y/N).

Honestly, he didn’t know what he was going to do.

#stranger things #billy hargrove #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove angst #angst #my fics #stranger things x reader

[pauls1967moustache]

Not sure if you’ve done it yet but fic recommendations? I love your writing so much that I’m pretty sure I’ll love whatever’s your favorite fics with these two :)

sure!

in no particular order:

for though they may be parted by @downtothe-lastdrop. my fave author in this fandom. i cherish our mutual connection of "but i love YOUR work". anyway choosing this one in particular bc it's a severance au and severance has also captured my brain worms.

Let Me Roll It THEE apple new york trip fic. the only one. this is it.

I Need You Darlin' (So Come Go With Me) by Anonymous. ok, listen. hear me out. i am not an A/B/O person. i only ever try it when i am truly desperate for something new to read. HOWEVER, this one consumed me a lil bit. i started reading this on like sunday night two weeks ago and ended up staying up till 5am, and then i pulled a sicky at work (bc i am not 16 anymore and can no longer read fic till 5am without consequence), and then i spent my "sick" day finishing it, and it was sooooo good. even the sex was hot, despite me being squeamish about A/B/O. could not recommend enough.

Don't Think About It by @merseydreams. everyone's recced and read The Birthday Party, so I'm being contrarian and saying read this one!! (and also The Birthday Party).

When You Are Young They Assume You Know Nothing by Lily_Padd_23. paris fic! this one is soooooo lovely. the atmosphere they set in this makes me want to fall in love this instant! it reminded me of the film Before Sunrise (fave movie). just gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous!

Other by @scurator. cannot tell you how many times i've read this. unique and sexy and lovely! (as is all of their work! i'm in awe!)

across the river, deep and wide which is orphaned but i believe is also by @scurator but since it's orphaned it doesn't count. they get two. it's my list! anyway, Harold, they're lesbians. also, read the follow up when you're done :)

Away to His Castle by RedheadAmongWolves. i'm such a sucker for bed-sharing and this one is so beautiful, and melancholy.

always, no sometimes by @stonedlennon, this one is so 🥺 (but also so sexy). peak 1967 romance. i read this like "they were in love here" and they were!!!

the way things sometimes are by paisana. they are so sweet and stupid and soft and this one. it captures those feelings of being young and having a mortifying crush so well. made my heart so full when i read it.

i was a younger man then (now) (post hoc) by @fingersfallingupwards. time traveller's wife au!!!!!!!! a perfect fic.

The Last Time I Saw Paris by Celebratory Penguin. if you like paul on the brink (with a happy ending) (rare), then do i have a the fic for you! also: paris! (but not the one you think)

Jugular by sexysadie. this one's all vibes and they are so mean to each other but EYE find that enjoyable so it's a 10/10 from me.

Two Kinds by Lollytree. one thing about me is i love a calm before a storm. set during MMT :)

(I've Got) Everything That You Want by james_winston. hamburg era. they are so funny and silly and stupid here. boys <3 ��

have to mention life flows within you by @orphanbeat even if it's not (technically) a j/p fic because it is my favourite beatles fic and i have read it 18 million times.

#to be clear: all of these authors have written multiple bangers i'm just picking out 1 or 2 for the sake of brevity #also idk everyone's tumblr so lemme know if missed one and i'll edit #all of us having different usernames between platforms was a mistake 🙃 #asks #fic rec

[sunshinesdaydream]

Happy birthday to your blog!! And thank you to Isa and Greatheart for taking on the tasks of match making us, what a lovely treat! I hope it's not too late to send one of these in, if it is feel free to ignore this! Wouldn't want you to get overwhelmed ❤️

You can if course call me Deeja and my pronouns are She/her

Physical description, I'm short and pretty small just all around, which has made me very good at climbing things lol I have shoulder length brown hair that's usually dyed red and brown eyes

My style/aesthetic is....I don't really know honestly??? I guess I would call it nerdy hippy. I have lots of collectables and wear geeky t-shirts a lot, but I also have lots of flowery decor, witchy themed stuff and wear patchwork skirts with flowy tops soooooo, yeah, nerdy flower child lol

For fun I primarily write now days, but I also love video games (especially RPGs or narrative driven games), painting, cosplaying, and making crafts in general. I'm one of those people who wants to try every creative outlet they can get their hands on but then let's them go by the wayside because of busy adult life.

As for my personality, I'm someone who tries their best to treat everyone with decency and respect, I always want to be kind to others unless they give me a reason not to be. That being said, I can be a little closed off at times. I have trouble letting others in and allowing myself to be vulnerable with them, even if we're close. It's something I'm trying to work on but, years of being put in a caregiver role who has to hold everything together makes it hard to rely on others. On a happier note, I love making people laugh, bringing that kind of joy to others is one of the best feelings ever and being able to be silly around my loved ones is very important to me! I'd also say that I'm pretty introverted, I don't mind going out with people I'm comfortable around, but I also love just chilling at home in PJs, whether it's us doing our own things near each other or actively doing something together I'm down for it 💙

As for a first date, I think going to a fair/carnival would be fun! It's a little adventurous and the rides and games gives us something to do, but it's not too distracting so that we can still talk and connect with each other!

I think that's about it, but I'll end by saying that I don't really have a "type" when looking for love, besides just wanting someone kind. I'd love to be with someone who makes me feel safe and as though I can open up to them and depend on them.

Thank you so much for doing this wonderful idea! You're amazing ✨💕

Hope you are ready for these two, because they are ready for you!

Isa: It's good to see you Deeja! Greatheart gave me a recommendation for you after speaking to this particular trooper.

Greatheart: I just brought your attention to him, cyar'ika, he seems very kind.

Isa: I thought so too. He is by nature very supportive and patient. But he is also funny. Very easy to talk to!

Greatheart: So to arrange this first date I did have to branch out. But I found good transport for you. There is a carnival in the southern hemisphere that will only take a short shuttle ride.

Isa: We think you will have an amazing time with Waxer, darling.

Isa & Greatheart

#Clone Matchmaking #Sunshine's 10th Celebration #star wars #the clone wars #clone trooper #clone trooper waxer #tcw waxer

[tirkdi]

no i will get you started on that kiss. speak your mind.

haha oh no, anon! (re my comment at the end of this ask)

look. I try not to be too down on things on main because I think we are all just here to have a good time, so for anyone who loves the darklina kiss scenes in the show, this ask is not for you! I'm not trying to make people enjoy them less, but since you asked I will share the ways in which I wish they were done differently

so first – the kisses/sexual consent in the books are terrible, and I think we all know that. In my modern au/occasional-retelling of the series, I initially tried writing their first kiss the way it was in the books and it felt soooooo gross. we all expected they'd do better in the show with consent, and they did! but to me a lot of it was still not done as well as it could have been

alina takes the initiative in kissing aleks in the show, which, given the power dynamics between them, is great. love that, it gets rid of some of the problems. (their power dynamics are also very different in the show vs books to begin with, which gets rid of some other problems.) but she kisses him and then he says: 'not that many people surprise me, miss starkov.'

(we are going to leave aside that I hate when men in romances call the women 'miss,' because I realize that is a personal problem, but I really, really do hate it. rip me reading or watching literally anything these days)

but the fact is: she kissed him, for the first time, and he was surprised about it. and that doesn't feel good to me! he's smiling when he says it, and it's pretty clear from his reaction that he was into it, but what if he hadn't been? women don't get to go around surprising people with kisses just because they're women (and, in this particular scenario, not running the army the other person is in)

rather than the show writers being like 'oh it was problematic when he surprised her with a kiss – let's have her surprise him instead!' I would have loved to see some ... I don't know ... actual conversation about it? they're adults! they can ask a question about whether or not the other person is into kissing in a way that is still sexy! they have both done much, much harder things

and I believe I am in the extreme minority here (I certainly am amongst my friends) but I also disliked the 'are you sure' that aleks says mid-make out on the war room table. 'are you sure' – of what???? I definitely expected him, after he collared her and she's like 'what are you doing??', to retort 'well you said you were sure.' I recently read a fic where he said something along the lines of 'you said you were sure – I thought you understood that that meant you were willing to risk getting pregnant' which like ... the fact that it is so vague is what makes it not a good question! (also what a random time to ask, she literally just kissed you?)

and, now I am on a full tangent, but it was interesting how, though they clearly cared more about sexual consent in the show than in the books, the scene where he collars her and then uses her power felt much more physically violating in the show than it ever did when I read it. I wondered if that was the tradeoff they made – they wanted to show some of that violation and lack of consent but they didn't want it to be around kissing

so. anyway. I am thrilled for much of the fandom (and many of my friends!) that those scenes did it for them. while certainly miles better than the books, I still think it could have – pretty easily – been done a lot better. especially since it seemed like they were trying to make it not problematic, I'm surprised it was done the way it was

#an ask #anonymous #you wanted it you got it haha #grishaverse #aleksander morozova #alina starkov

[mxtxfanatic]

Thanks for answering my ask.....if you don't mind me asking (again), can I ask your top 5 (or top 3) favorite characters from MDZS? And why do you love them? And your top 5 (or top 3) favorite moments from the novel? Sorry if you've answered this question before....Thanks....

Hello again! Alright, so mdzs list this time!

Favorite Characters:

Wei Wuxian: he’s smart, quick on his feet, a genius in his field, charming, a good person, innocent in love, strong in his morals, willing to fight for what he believes in and what is right even if it makes him enemy to all, has faith in himself, doesn’t shrink away from his emotions, unwilling to delude himself to reality even if it looks bleak, etc etc; he is literally the perfect protagonist in every single way

Lan Wangji: perfect compliment to wwx; they match each other so well in most of the things I listed for wwx but replace the “charming” with “takes no shit” and we got a winner

3, 4, and 5 (in no particular order). Wen Qing, Jiang Yanli, and a-Qing: I know people like to call mxtx misogynistic because “she kills off women!” and “they’re not main characters!” but I would argue that 1) that’s dumb because most of the characters we are introduced to in mdzs are already dead and 2) mxtx writes her female characters as people rather than props. I was enamored with these characters at their every appearance, however short, because they felt so real and expressive. I could get personality and motives, tell what they’d like and what would piss them off, come to enjoy them so much that I felt pain knowing they were already gone. This is the skill of mxtx’s writing.

Favorite Scenes!

Drunken shenanigans #2 where wangxian play the “catch me, kiss me” game, then wwx kisses him on the lips and lwj promptly knocks himself the fuck out lmao

Drunken shenanigans #3/bath tub sex (I feel like this is pretty self-explanatory)

Incense Burner dream #1 where wwx shows lwj his first-life daydreams of retiring to a remote farm together and it’s so innocent, only for lwj’s graphic teenage sex dream to also be revealed; also the actual sex scene

When wwx and lwj put nmj’s body back together sans the head, both of them tell lxc the likely murder of his sword brother is jgy, and lxc says that he is willing to vouch that jgy would never do such a thing… then the chapter immediately ends and the next starts with us seeing that jgy did, in fact, do such a thing and soooooo much worse right in lxc’s face LOL

Second Siege of the Burial Mounds, which between wwx telling the cultivation world that he will NOT bear their resentment as if he’s guilty for having acted against them, the Wen remnants choosing to rescue the people who killed them simply because of their gratefulness to wwx for trying to save them once, the reveal to the CHILDREN how corrupt their parents actually are to have gleefully killed a bunch of defenseless people before desecrating their bodies and lying about it, and how the adults who said they were justified to kill wwx and the wen remnants are the ones shamed by the end? There’s just so many winners in this part

#mdzs asks #dnana 2809 blog #should’ve done this ask yesterday so anon could’ve really been pissed lmao #but yes the sex scenes are really some of my favs in this book #for the sex yes but also other reasons #there’s levels

[oldfashionedmorphine]

⭐Mike's dynamic with Will and how it progresses and or the head space he's in in iawwoyh. You write everyone so well and I really love how you write Mike in particular. If you'd rather delve into the playlist for this fic instead that would be interesting to hear about too! No pressure to answer.🤎

thank you! <3 always shocked when i get compliments about how i write mike (and others) because i’m constantly wondering if i’m getting them right lol

i think one of the fun things about “i’m a wreck (without you here)” (despite it being soooooo depressing at times) is that it’s a slice of life with some flashbacks, so we get to see mike’s life throughout the years, from as young as 5 all the way up to 33…it’s definitely a challenge to depict how he changes after everything he’s been through too…how would he move forward as a person if he didn’t seek therapy after canon events? and what would it look like if it remained unaddressed?

basically mike goes from being someone who cared about excelling in school with ambitious goals for his future to someone who stopped seeing the point (i kinda piggybacked off of canon behavior—his acting out in school in season 2 and his C in spanish in season 4…and then made it worse in the fic because he has a major lack of focus plus extreme low self worth/undiagnosed depression) and what this leads to is him slowly starting to isolate himself, especially after high school ends. it didn’t help that he was struggling with his feelings for will, which the problems between them mainly started when will began to distance himself from mike first (because will was trying to protect his own heart, thinking mike was straight) and meanwhile mike didn’t know what to do about that—he felt rejected without ever making his feelings known, and so he constantly puts himself down, believing he isn’t attractive enough, and then he ends up jealous of every boyfriend will ever has—again he never makes his feelings known to will (like come on, mike…how would will know you’re interested if you don’t say anything and stay stuck in the closet??)

but things with his father reach a boiling point and he snaps and flees hawkins and because of that, it becomes the “final straw” for will (they hadn’t been as close by that point, but it was enough for will to feel like he had to cut him off) and of course…mike didn’t take that well and ends up stuck on their falling out for years—he tries to move on, but he’s never successful and in between all of that he starts developing an addiction to alcohol because it helps numb the pain of his unrequited love and his disappointment with life because it didn’t turn out the way he once thought it would’ve…

which it’s a horrible coping mechanism and his alcohol abuse has gradually gotten worse over the past decade and nancy’s sudden death has quite frankly pushed him over the edge to where he’s finally reached bottom…because as much as mike would’ve liked reuniting with will and having his love returned to be the main answer to all his problems, it isn’t—mike definitely has to be the one to save himself, but it does help having will back in his life.

oh and that playlist…what can i say? haha! it’s super long (currently 11 hours…but in my defense i’ve been adding to it for over a year) and i’m extra picky about the songs—all songs are 2004 or older…the lyrics either fit the chapter in some way or it’s a song that mike listens to or hears in the background at some point during the chapter.

ps: i have like maybe 4-5 more chapters to write plus an epilogue for this story—it’s almost finished! i’m currently dealing with some writer’s block again, but i’m sure it’ll pass soon 🥲

#thanks for the ask :) #my inbox is always open #iawwyh

[niuniente]

Hello Niu, I've come to ask you if you have any recommendations for particular books, websites, or people for dream interpretation? Or perhaps advice for how to interpret.

Tonight I had a dream and one part just felt so significant, and I must write it before its lost to me.

In the dream I was relaxing in a guest bed at a home that's not mine, and suddenly my mouth hurt and a tooth fell out. On rushing to the bathroom, it turned out many teeth had broken or fully fallen out or had big ugly cavities (the absolute horror 😱)

In one particular cavity, there was a whole entire frog hiding inside? Idk how?? It must have been very small.

In my hand full of broken bloody teeth there was a good sized round stone, with a small iridescence on the edge. On breaking open this stone, it had a beautiful rainbow ammonite fossil.

I know I can google "frog dream meaning" and "broken teeth dream meaning" there are just soooooo many results, and often websites vary drastically in what they say (especially for frogs) so I wanted to ask your thoughts on where to look

Regardless if you have advice, thank you for your time and your open inbox. Wishing you good vibes and good times <3

I'm unfortunately not specialized in dreams and don't know any extra good sources. When you encounter animals in dreams, check what their spiritual meaning is (for example in this case; "frog spirit animal"). Some of the animal guidance pages have meanings from multiple culture for the said animal. Something there most likely fits your situation.

Broken teeth and tooth injuries are always stress or anxiety related dreams. What worries you at this moment? Have you taken enough time to rest? How's your self confidence?

Long, long time ago I read of a woman who has been doing dream interpretations for 30 years. She said that the best person to tell what the dream means is the person who had the dream, because it's a direct message from the person's subconscious mind.

When googling, keep googling until you land to something which resonates with you. I once had a dream where two spiders twice of my size came inside a house I was in. When I defended myself and hit one of them, it cried out with a sad voice my spirit guide's name, Ian.

After the dream I spent hours trying to understand what a Spider means. All dream interpretations said that it was a bad omen but it didn't feel like it, especially when the spiders were friendly and called Ian, who is my guardian. Finally, I found a Hopi story of the Grandmother Spider, Hopi Kokyangwuti, who created the world and humans (if I remember it right). I realized that the Spiders in my dream were encouraging me to be more creative, as I had planned to but kept pushing it aside because I was "too busy".

Since then, seeing living spiders randomly has always meant for me that it's time to be creative, especially to write something. I literally fall into a bad health and a bad mental space if I don't do something creative regularly, so Spider is always a good reminder that time to get creative.

You can find your own meanings to your dreams and symbols like this, too. Sometimes it is a bit like a detective work.

#ask niu

[squarebracket-trickster]

Thumbprint Tag

Rules: look back on your work, both past and present, finished and unfinished. What are five to ten narrative elements or tropes that continuously pop up in your work? Give a list of these things!

@on-noon don't mind if I jump on your open tag. I can get soooooo weirdly specific with this...

Oh yes, and I am going to carry on the open tag. Anyone that wants to join may.

Read More because oddly specific requires lots of words--

A female character from a very disadvantaged background (see political prisoner, indentured servant, peasant, enslaved person, poor etc.) who has an unlikely meet cute with someone (male) who turns out to be extremely privileged (see royalty, crazy rich etc.). They become friends. One day she has a really rough day, ends up sick, and he takes care of her (like makes her meals, rubs her shoulders, holds her hair when she throws up etc.). They don't end up dating until a while after this happens. If I had a nickel for every time this shows up in a story I'd have dollars by now.

Two or three female characters that my straight-ass spends years trying to ship with every palatable male character in the story to see if I can make them date. After years without success I finally realize that these characters are lesbians and they were made for each other. When their story arcs get finalized into canon they have an epic friends-to-lovers slow burn romance.

A main female character that, in hindsight, should have been my clue that I had ADHD. Re: talks too fast, says the most random shit, won't shut up, sits weirdly in chairs, really good in a crisis, always waving her hands when she talks, sensory issues galore, no eye contact, last minute queen, always has a song stuck in her head, can list 50 digits of pi but can't remember why the fuck she just walked into that room, and most importantly, me saying about this character, "I feel so relaxed when I write/daydream about her. It's like a release. Like, I can finally be myself and do all the things people think are annoying, but everyone in her life thinks she's funny and likes her energy." Like, you might as well have written MASKING ADHD directly across my forehead.

A monarchy that becomes a republic by the end of the story because I want to write about attractive princes and badass queens/empresses but I am also an anti-monarchist...

A character who was based off an irl friend that lost relevance in the story and got written out, only for me to eventually drift away from that friend or discover that they weren't the friend I thought they were.

Long rants about whatever topic I am learning about in uni at that time (assigned to a particular character for plot reasons). This week's rant was on Populism...

A couple that I decided could never be a couple because the power imbalance and political nonsense was too problematic, who ended up becoming a couple anyways because I have no self-control and them being together was just so *feels*. When all is finalized into canon, these couples get a glorious enemies-to-lovers slow burn that lasts several years and plenty of denial (in homage to my own feelings on the subject).

That moment when a character takes off their disguise and reveals that they are, in fact, a princess, goddess, secret agent etc. in order to save someone's life.

Idk what some of these say about me. idk if I want to know...

#tag game #wipi sort of #wipiii sort of