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#'how have you been?' 'oh not great I'm mentally ill in a way that makes me get so obsessed with men that everything else stops existing so
running-in-the-dark · 1 month
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I could've been insane in an interesting way at least but noo, I just think about a stupid guy so much that I lose my mind, how fucking stupid is that
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ozzgin · 4 months
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OZZGIN!
May I request an idea/imagine?
It is about yandere! mental asylum patient and psychiatrist! reader, who is very practical and strict regarding her job, takes no BS from others. But, for some reason, she has a soft spot for yandere! mental asylum patient. The reason could either be he had a hard childhood in which he had to do what he had to do, which brutally killed his father, who used to abuse his mother and sister, but when the father tried to sell the sister into prostitution to buy more alcohol, all hell break lose. Psychiatrist! reader thinks what yandere! mental asylum the patient did was OKAY, and she wants to get him out of the asylum. They love each other deeply and would do anything, so far as to kill for one another. If you can, make it as twisted as you can. I live for some dark romance!
Please ignore my request if you are not able to do it. I completely understand. Thank you in advance! <3
Oh my, this request hits somewhat close to home as I have a friend incarcerated for similar reasons. I'm pondering the logistics behind this context you've provided, since murdering someone won't necessarily land you in a psych ward unless there are other symptoms that come with it. And so I've taken the liberty to expand the character's profile if that's alright. (Conveniently enough I still have my psychopathology lecture notes)
I want to add, however, that this story in no way romanticizes mental illness! If anything, one may consider it an opportunity to reflect on the fact that so many people struggling with disorders do not receive the proper care for it, or only do so when it's too late. Furthermore a medical professional should never, ever behave like this and whatever is written here should stay in the realm of fiction!
Yandere! Patient x Psychiatrist! Reader
Featuring a patient that's pushing the boundaries of your work ethic and might even succeed.
Content/warnings: female reader, detailed mentions of mental disorder, violence, obsessive behavior, breach of professional conduct
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You roll up your sleeve and check your watch. He should be here soon. Out of habit, you shuffle the papers for a quick case review, even though you already know all the details by heart. You carefully set aside the patient’s MMPI and WHODAS entry assessments, then your first interviews. Your eyes briefly rest upon the resulting report you’ve comprised: Schizophreniform Disorder (Provisional) with good prognostic features; Diagnostic criteria consisting of delusions, disorganized speech (frequent derailment with episodes of incoherence, echolalia) and comorbid catatonia. Responds well to antipsychotic (clozapine 25mg/12 h) with no imminent need for dosage increase. As it currently stands, he will be fit for proper incarceration in less than 6 months. Is it something you agree with? Not quite. You’ve presented your case many times and it has always been met with pitiful shrugs and dismissals.
The door opens and you fix your posture, sweeping the documents back into your drawer. “And? How are you feeling today?” You ask, flashing a professional, cordial smile as the assisting nurse leads the patient to his seat and prepares her leave. “My chest hurts.” The man answers in a low voice, glaring at the nurse. He taps his foot against the plush carpet, seemingly restless. “How bad would you rate it? Chest pain is a somewhat common side effect of your medication.” You retort, following the movements of the woman finally excusing herself and exiting the room. Once you’re alone, the man’s shoulders droop and he visibly relaxes. “It’s not that, you know it. When can I touch you again?” He pleads, despair twisting his features. You tense up at the words. “Behave yourself. It hasn’t been that long.”
It’s not something you’re particularly proud of. In fact, you might even call it one of your great shames in life. You’ve always been a textbook professional, perhaps even too strict according to your coworkers and most patients. Not even in your wildest dreams would you have dared to imagine you’d violate the code of ethics by falling in love with your patient. But something about his situation stirred your sense of justice. Surely one cannot be punished for protecting their loved ones. The only criminal in the equation, at least in your eyes, was that joke of a father and he had it coming. So you found yourself wrestling against a blooming protectiveness and favoritism towards the young man brought here last month.
What would have normally compelled you into action had therefore been silently swept under the rug. Or even worse, you secretly indulged in it. A patient showing signs of affection towards you would instantly be transferred to a different psychiatrist. Yet you couldn’t put away the letters written by this one. Erratic, crumpled notes of “I love you” written countless times, pencil dug so deep it tore into the sheet. Bizarre illustrations that looked almost threatening. His elaborate delusions before medication was introduced, where he’d detail in grand narratives how you were fated for each other and nothing would stop him from having you sooner or later. You do not know what forces possessed you into this addictive plunge, but you’ve come to enjoy his violent, frenzied confessions. So much, that during one of the unsupervised meetings you let yourself pushed into the sofa as his hands tugged at your body in rabid need. It was so out of character that you wondered if it truly happened, though the bite marks and scratches on your neck and chest proved otherwise.
“Are they going to send me to prison?” He changes the subject and stands up, walking towards your desk. “Most likely. What you have is the result of a traumatic event, not a lifelong condition. Sporadic episodes that can be kept under control with antipsychotics aren’t enough of a reason to keep you in the hospital.” You press your legs together nervously and glance at him. “Can’t you just say it’s no longer working?” He suggests, kneeling before you and placing a hand on your thigh. “You know I can’t lie on the report.” You really don’t like it when he manipulates you like this. “Ah, yes, because lying is worse than fucking your patient.” He scoffs, annoyed. “Don’t threaten me like that”, you say as you turn towards him, but you’re stopped by the rough grip of his hand over your cheeks. “I’m not threatening you, I’m threatening everyone else. Listen, (Y/N), I’m not fucking around. I don’t mind pretending to be crazy if I have to. Will the meds still be working if I steal a shaving razor and cut the nurse open?” You try to open your mouth, but his fingers are pressed into your skin, locking your jaw into place. “I’m not going to prison. I’m not. Then I’ll never see you again and that can’t happen. You know that.”
Eventually he releases his hold, allowing you to speak. "I understand. Then there's no choice but to arrange your escape." You sigh, defeated, and he raises his eyebrows. "Won't that get you in trouble?" You chuckle at his statement. "Either way I'll be in trouble. You said it yourself. Might as well quit before I have to stand in front of the ethics board and have my license revoked." You'd prefer to keep the last ounce of pride if possible.
He sits on the floor and you notice his trembling hands. "Nervous?" You ask. "No. Just really happy. I'm not a bad person and you were the only one here to see it. But God, (Y/N), I'd kill anyone if it was for your sake. I can't wait to hold you whenever I want." He gazes at you as a smile widens on his face.
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slayfics · 10 months
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Muichiro reminds you you’re his Tsuguko.
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A crow flew overhead alerting you and Muichiro of some Kanoto ranks in danger from a demon nearby. You both took off immediately to help them and take care of the demon.
Upon arrival, Muichiro let you handle the demon while he moved the lower ranks out of danger.
The demon wasn't challenging so it was the perfect time to try out some new techniques you just learned and had been practicing with Muichiro.
Muichiro observed taking mental notes of how you were doing when he overheard the lower ranks talking behind him.
"Wow, they are incredible," one said, watching you battle the demon.
"Not to mention beautiful too, think I could ask them on a date?" The other asked.
"Yeah right like they would ever give you the time of day," the first one replied laughing.
Muichiro scrunched his nose up in disgust but didn't turn around to face the Kanoto's. Of course, you wouldn’t be interested in any of those swordsmen he thought.
Or would you? The thought of you accompanying one of them on a date suddenly made him feel ill. He blinked hard, forcing the image out of his mind, and focused back on how you were doing. The lower ranks were right, you were doing amazing and it was stunning to watch.
You finished off the demon and made your way over to Muichiro and the other swordsmen.
"Are you all ok?" You asked them.
"They are fine with only minor injuries," Muichiro answered before any of them could speak to you.
"Oh, that's great! Do any of you need help getting to your next destination?” You asked, but again Muichiro spoke for them standing in between you and them.
"Their next destination is a Wisteria House not too far from here. Surely they can make that journey on their own. If they can't, they should quit the demon slayer corps now." He said sharply, turning his head to side-eye them. "Ask for us, we have much more work to do today and should be off." He said, and motioned for you to follow him in the opposite direction of the Kanoto ranks.
"Ok bye then, safe travels!" You said waving at the Kanoto ranks and following Muichiro.
"Geez, the Hashira are all real pieces of work aren't they?" You heard one Kanoto say as you departed. If Muichiro heard, he didn't care to dignify the lower rank with a response.
"How did I do Tokito?" You decided to ask, pushing the Kanoto's statement out of your mind.
"You did great, excellent work using your breathing techniques. We just have to work on getting you faster." He replied.
"Oh wow really! Thank you!" You said beaming at his praise. Sure he had some notes of improvement, but Muichiro always did. The fact that he had anything nice to say at all meant you must have done exceptionally well.
"I'm not the only one that thought so either," he said.
"Hm? What do you mean?"
"Those lower ranks seemed to be captivated by you. One wanted to ask you on a date."
"Oh!" You exclaimed, feeling a blush creep onto your cheeks.
"You should know though, you're my Tsuguko and you don't have time for trivial matters such as that," Muichiro stated.
This caused you to process the scene just now. Specifically, the way Muichiro refused to let you speak to the Kanoto's, and how he ensured to stay physically between you and them. A small smirk found its way to your lips. Was Muichiro really just trying to keep you focused on training? Or was something else going on here, you wondered.
"That's fine. I wouldn't be interested in any of their company anyway." You said teasingly.
"No?" Muichiro asked and turned to face you.
"Nope. I'm only interested in one swordsman's company."
Muichiro's eyes widened in curiosity, "what swordsman is that?" He asked.
"You of course." You said, and Muichiro swiftly turned back around, but you could have sworn you saw his face flush before he did.
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Tagging those that asked~
@aeolia18 @plvuii @muichirouswife
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antimony-medusa · 5 months
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"There's just something about that guy that means I don't trust him"
Okay so, Phil has got the wrong read of Sunny. I'm gonna start off with that. He thinks they're a confident unconcerned material girl who is comfortable in the fact that their dad loves them, and potentially he thinks that they're a bit older than they are? Whereas people who have been able to see her one-on-one with Tubbo know that she's quite a bit more shy and insecure and young than she puts on! He's been taken in by the facade they're putting on, and I think that's part of why he is making jokes and comments that don't hit well. To understate how yesterday went. I think he botched the interaction with Sunny in the musuem and I hope someone tells him that, so he can apologize and fix that. And to be clear, as a phil viewer, this does interesting character work with Sunny as a sensitive child and I'm in favour of Sunnymin pursuing this line of lore. I'm staring with my little cube guy watching googles looking for the result when Phil realizes he scared a child, with great interest.
Because when you look at the musum one in context, my read is that was phil pivoting badly from an out of lore discussion into "oh hey I can explain something to sunny, who is confident and centred and knows her dad adores her" and then jokingly tried to explain the tallulah experience, and then we know from Sunny signs later that that went over like a ton of bricks. Mistake. However, when we're discussing it, I think it's fair to not have that understanding of the lore though, and to take a more pointed, villainous read of the lore! Go for it with discussing phil as cold and brusque to people who aren't his family, discuss Sunny feeling all alone in the musuem, fill your boots.
But guys, when you're discussing this as meta, I am seeing a lot of tags that are really really eager to paint Phil entirely and unequivocally as a villain and specifically cruel to children and cruel within the family, and there's an element to that that concerns me.
Phil, the cc, the guy, acts working class. He has an accent from a particular part of england that is traditionally working class, but he also has storytelling cadences and humour styles and attitudes towards challenges that are very familiar if you are from a working class or lower income community. I'm from an entirely different continuent, but the area I'm from is the sort of area that people make jokes about, and the whole way Phil acts as a CC is very familiar to me. (Note: even when he's talking about travel or stuff, he still has the "worked retail for a decade" mentality and pays attention to the staff and stuff and what they're doing, check out the brazil storytelling vod.)
And Phil's cubito, when he's not deliberately making a character like osmp crowfather, tends to have the mannerisms of someone who is working class. Even if you're not from a lower income area, I think most people can clock this, subconciously if nothing else. He swears a lot! He banters and roasts his friends and family but would absolutely do anything for them. He's informal in a very specific way.
Which is why when people pivot immediately into "why is he threatening and bullying children again" and "his wicked is showing", and "oh he's a evil stepfather/cruel stepmother" and "can we kill the child abusers now" I go Oh No.
Working class mannerisms are already stereotyped as especially prone to domestic abuse, among other ills. If you are going "oh something about him just always seemed like he would be cruel to children" maybe— push back on that one?
In the same way that during the election I was going "that may not be the play" about americans who didn't know what it was but something about Forever was just so angry and agressive (and they were talking from a perspective that viewed forever as a person of colour, regardless of how he's perceived at home), you might be talking from a perspective that encourages you to interpret Phil's behaviour with children as especially suspect. Potentially. Consider it.
And again, Phil biffed it in the musuem. That was a misstep that had me (autistic) going "oh no I see how you got there but you can all but see the sims negative relationship marker thing pop up". But I'd ask you at least to consider that it wasn't intentional cruelty, and that people can make social missteps before you jump immediately to interpreting their actions in the worst light possible.
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mxqdii · 5 months
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can u write matt w/ gf who has depression bc of college? I'm literally living a nightmare rn and i need some fluff
a/n: if you ever need to talk my dms are open ml!! anyways hope you enjoy <33
take a break - m.s
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pairings: matt sturniolo x reader
summary: reader is stressed cause of college and starts to break
warning(s): crying, stress, matt comfort
not proofread
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getting into my dream college was the best and worst thing to ever happen to me
dont get me wrong, its great, and most people would kill to be where i am right now
but... i am mentally dying.
preparing for my SATs, going to work, hanging out with people,
its too much
not to mention, this week not only do i have to study but i have a big project due
its all just impossible
my phone rings and i get a bunch of looks, mumbling a few 'sorrys' as i leave the library
"hello?" i say, now in the hallway
"hi baby, are you okay?" my boyfriend, matt, asks
"oh hi matt! yeah, yeah im fine" i lie, feeling the tears brim my eyes at his question
"no you're not, talk to me, whats wrong?"
thats my breaking point
"i just- its too much matt, this is all too much, SATs, i have a project and- i just-" i try to get the words out, but fail, not making any sense
"hey, it's okay, listen to me, ill be there in 10 minutes okay? just go to your dorm and we'll figure it out okay baby?" he says and i sigh
"matt you dont have to-"
"im already on my way love" he says and i sigh
what did i do to deserve such an amazing boyfriend
i walk back to my dorm, wiping my tears as they fall
i unlock my door, seeing flowers and my favorite food laid out on the table
"hi baby" matt says, standing in front of me
"how- how?" i ask
"i've been here for an hour now, i was gonna surprise you later but you were upset so i thought it'd be better if you came now" he explains and my expression softens
"matt..." i say, walking up to hug him
"thank you, so much. i love you so much" i say as he rubs my back
"i love you more princess"
TAGLIST:
@opheliaofficial07 @stargirlv0id @strnilolo @annaisabookworm @theperson-nextdoor @prettysturniolo @its-jennarose @gottamakemyhatersmad @luvsturniolo
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morallyinept · 7 months
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It's the end of another week, so you know what that means, right?
Self-Care with Dieter and Jett! 
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Hang on, wait-wait a minute. Frankie?? What are you doing here, where's Dieter? 
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Ah. Don't tell me; he's in rehab again. Yes? Well good for him. So you're here to what? I see. You're filling in for him this week. My, what a chivalrous man you are. And so handsome too.
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Stop blushing. You know you're hot.
Well, I suppose we'd better get on with it, hadn't we?
It's the end of another week, so you know what that means, right?
Feel Good Friday with Dieter Frankie and Jett! 
Happy Frankie Friday, everyone! 💚
So, it's Friday. You made it through another week. You're doing amazing! Look at you go! Now's the time to kick back, relax and enjoy that Friday feeling, eh Frankie? 
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That's the spirit. Wait, how many of those have you had?
As we enter the weekend, what are you doing to recharge your batteries? And, if you happen to be working because you don't get weekends off, that's okay. You can always save this for your day(s) off. When it comes to feeling good, there are no set days. No set routine. No rules. 
Frankie, do you have some ideas to share about what you do to feel good? 
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Come on, don't be shy...
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Great! Let's hear them, bud. 
Get out & go for a walk. 
Getting out in nature is a great way to unwind and destress from a hard week of labour, both physical and mental. Surround yourself in the beauty of nature. Visit your local beauty spot; this could be a lake, a park, the beach. Go for a hike in the woods.
Sweat it out stalking through the Colombian jungle… 
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Either way, get out and inhale that fresh air deep into your lungs. Be brave and travel somewhere you've never been to before, especially if you have the means to. You might just find something wonderful.
☝🏻And can I just plant the seed for some solo travel? You don't need to go far, especially if you're anxious about being on your own, but it's definitely something I recommend, and often do myself. The feeling of being self-reliant and discovering somewhere new by yourself, is incredible. 
Catch up with friends.
Grab a beer (or several) with your buddies at the bar. Have a movie night together. Cook a meal for your chums; homemade tacos anyone? Have a go at making some fun, themed cocktails at home. Go dancing. Grab a speedboat and traverse the choppy waters after a high speed beach chase...
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When you surround yourself with the people you love most and who have your back, you always feel good. And you can always count on them to make sure you make it down the Andes mountains in one piece. 
Unless your name is Tom... Then, you know, you won't. 😬
Engage in a hobby you love - or try a new one.
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Woah! Is that a… oh right, sorry. You were in the forces. Silly me.
My, that's a pretty big gun you're packing there, Frankie. Mind if I, uh, hold it…? Wow, it's so big. So heavy. So... hard. Damn. 
Can I watch you, uh, shoot it? 
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No? Ooookay, moving on. (I'm missing Dieter already. Sheesh. 🙄)
Your time off is a great time to indulge in your hobbies. Practise your craft. Or try a new one out. You might find a new passion in something you least expected. And that's always so fun. 
Helicopter lessons anyone? 
Uh, Frankie? Is it always supposed to shake like this? Oh shit, I'm gonna puke! 🤢
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Laugh. Yes, even snort laughing counts.
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Laughter releases feel good endorphins, and after a hard week, sometimes it's hard to find a reason to giggle, right? But did you know that laughter is actually really good for your health?
No? Well Frankie, take a look at this, my good man:
Laughter relaxes the whole body. A good, hearty laugh relieves physical tension and stress, leaving your muscles relaxed for up to 45 minutes after.
Laughter boosts the immune system. Laughter decreases stress hormones and increases immune cells and infection-fighting antibodies, thus improving your resistance to disease and illness.
Laughter triggers the release of endorphins, the body's natural feel-good chemicals. Endorphins promote an overall sense of well-being and can even temporarily relieve pain.
Laughter protects the heart. Laughter improves the function of blood vessels and increases blood flow, which can help protect you against a heart attack and other cardiovascular problems.
Laughter burns calories. Okay, so it's no replacement for going to the gym, but one study has found that laughing for 10 to 15 minutes a day can burn approximately 40 calories - which could be enough to lose three or four pounds over the course of a year.
Laughter lightens anger's heavy load. Nothing diffuses anger and conflict faster than a shared laugh. Looking at the funny side can put problems into perspective and enable you to move on from confrontations without holding onto bitterness or resentment.
Laughter may even help you to live longer. A study in Norway found that people with a strong sense of humour outlived those who don't laugh as much.
So, find something to laugh about today. Just like Frankie here. 
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Hug it out.
When people hug for 20 seconds or more, the feel-good hormone oxytocin is released which creates a stronger bond and connection between the huggers. Oxytocin has been shown to boost the immune system and reduce stress.
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Aww… Frankie. That's so cute of you.
Oof, you're kinda squeezing me a little tight there. No, I didn't say stop! Ooh, you smell good. Mmm…
Hug it out with your besties. Your significant other. Your family. Your pet. Even yourself.
Yes! Hug yourself. A self-hug is a beautiful way to show yourself some compassion and kindness. As you wrap your arms around yourself, you send a powerful message of love and support to your inner self. Feel that zen!
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Phew! Are you all hugged out now Frankie? No? Okay. We can do it some more… We'll just stay like this for a bit. Nice.
What's that pressing into my thigh? Oh. Oh.
So, there we have it, lovelies. Frankie's Feel Good Friday. I hope Frankie and I were able to put a smile on your face and make you feel good today. Friday's are all about feeling good, but no matter the day of the week, I hope nothing but good vibes surround you.
☝🏻Don't worry, Dieter isn't going anywhere. He'll be back next time - as soon as his sixteenth stint in rehab is over... 😐
Hold strong, D. We love you.
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YOU. ARE. STRONGER. THAN. YOU. THINK. 💚🖤
Do you. Then do Dieter. Frankie.
🖤
More Dieter & Jett here
GIFS of Frankie used by @palioom @bruhlpng @perotovar Also found via Google/Pinterest. If I've used one of yours & not credited you, it's because they've been saved to my phone & I've forgotten since who created it. Let me know so I can add the appropriate credit. 🖤
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CHAPTER 35: The Asylum - Part 1
Thanks for holding on again, we hope your patience was worth it! Went with a slightly different presentation style this time round (more comic page form) so expect these uploads to not always be the same format- that's part of the fun we're having with it.
Lineart/cleanup, flats & writing- @wiggybe
Layout/roughs, shading/lighting & writing- @self-made-madman
(TW: Mental illness/health/asylums.)
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Once-ler: *Sitting at his desk in his office with his curtains closed, his hands through his hair and he's staring tiredly at a messy desk of papers in front of him. He was once reading them, but he's gotten to the point where he's so tired-out and stressed that he just stares at them without taking in any of the words, his eyes move over the same sentence he's been reading over and over again.*
Warden: *He just bursts through the door without knocking- though this is normal. He never knocks in his own jail, ever.* Good afternoon!~ *He's been... not perkier (it's impossible to be perkier than the Warden already is) but more bulletproof than ever since his breakdown. It's like a big weight off his shoulders.* How's my favourite accountant? Working hard or hardly working? Ha! You know, this place could use some sunshine! *Skips through the room poofing vases of flowers and other decorations around the room, as the curtains magically open.*
Once-ler: *Gasps at the sudden disruption of his silence and looks at the Warden with wide eyes which then squint at the sudden light. He almost hisses like a vampire bat when his perfect darkness disappears. He relaxes and then frowns a little.* It looks fine the way it is. *Leans on his elbow so he doesn't look at the Warden and takes his pen in his hand. He taps it a few times on the desk as he tries to read the papers again.*
Warden: *Pauses, and all the flowers in a vase he's holding wither and die.* Heeeey... *His voice softens down, actually showing some initiative and care for once.* You okay, buddy? *Walks over and rests a surprisingly parental hand on his shoulder. He looks down at Oncie's head with worry.*
Once-ler: *Sighs and drops back in his chair, throwing the pen onto the desk and his chair rolls back a little on the floor. He might have responded more callous if the Warden hadn’t picked up on his mood this time, and then adjusted his own mood to better console him. Instead, he sighs and drops his pen. His shirt is untucked and his braces hanging down by his waist instead of over his shoulders.* No. I'm not okay. *A bit of a whiny teenager voice. Then he frowns more seriously.* And I don’t appreciate you bursting in unannounced when I’m trying to work.
Warden: *Gives his shoulder a comforting squeeze.* What's up? I thought you liked that math-y boring stuff. *Sounds honestly like he cares. He really has grown very attached to his Oncie- enough to actually think of him as a human and not a toy. Which is just why he falter slightly when his sudden burst-in is mentioned.* Oh!-Uh… *Clears his throat then laughs awkwardly.* Sure, buddy! I hate it when Jared bursts in on me too- Not that I’m anything like Jared. *At least when HE suddenly shows up it’s for fun reasons, not boring annoying Jared reasons, and who wouldn’t want that? But he’s starting to learn that Oncie has his own feelings and ways of doing things, and that’s good, because if he was the same as everyone else then he wouldn’t be what makes him so great. He tilts his head.* Anything other than that your all-powerful prison-warden can do to help?
Once-ler: *Shakes his head, but he's really very grateful that he can feel the Warden concerned for him.* Not really. I have work to do for Superjail and then even more important work for my business. *Stands up and points at the Warden.* You've been spending too much over the budget again. *He points his thumb towards himself.* I need to get to Thneedville to sort out my factory. *His hands flick in mid air, flat, vertical and parallel to each other, like he’s showing a box size.* But I cant go to Thneedville, *then points at the floor,* Because I’m stuck here.
Warden: *Brightens up again* Weeeell, why didn't you say so?? *He completely glosses over, or doesn't even hear that he's over-budget. He never does, and probably never will. But, somehow, Superjail always survives.* How about you and I take some time out and go back? You can set up all your... *wiggles his fingers in midair,* factory doowhatsists, and I'll, I dunno, take in a tour! *The thought of Oncie going back alone doesn't even cross his mind. They're a duo.*
Once-ler: *Huffs and strokes his hand through the back of his hair. That’s not a terrible idea. Who’da thought he could just disappear? Maybe he’s becoming somewhat institutionalised here already and is still living with a prisoner mentality. He takes a glance at the papers and then frowns.* Yes! Yes! Okay, just take me out of here.
Warden: Alrighty! *Smiles and pulls Oncie backwards so he's suspended on the back two legs of his chair. He gives him a big kiss before they disappear, then reappear in a hover car on the coast of Superjail’s island. The car shoots off and off they go through the outer world back to mainland and back to Thneedville. There go his powers though- he won't be getting them back until Jailbot comes to get them. He did not think this through very much, but it's a perfectly reasonable plan so far.*
Once-ler: Hmph! *Gasps into the kiss and feels very dizzy once his powers take effect, the dizziness of the powers and the sudden romantic flutter in his stomach at the kiss, make stars appear as his eyes clench shut and they vanish. He snaps forward once they arrive in the car and gives a little shudder, feeling disorientated.* Uurgh…
Warden: *They land outside The Once-ler’s Lerkim and drags them out to the front door, before the car takes off again to leave back for Superjail. He pouts at him good-humouredly.* Enough moping! It's time to take care of your factory! *Wheels around him and moves to push him away from the building.* We'll meet back here in a few hours~
Once-ler: Wh- *Lets himself be walked out.* Where are you going?
Warden: Me? *Juts out his jaw as he thinks.* I guess I'll go exploring. We were so busy the last time we came here that I hardly saw any of the town~ *They were too 'busy'.* Now stop worrying! You're draggin' down the vibe.
Once-ler: You want to go exploring the town alone?- *His initial reaction to that-* No. *- and stops letting the Warden push him.*
Warden: Oof! *Crumples into the back of him, not ready for Oncie to stop moving.* *Pouts, speaking into Oncie's back with his nose and eyes visible over his shoulder.* Meanie.
Once-ler: *Looks over his shoulder.* I just don't want you getting into trouble. You'll probably end up punching a barbaloot or something *Frowns as he just put that image in his head. He might slap the man if he dared to harm any of the animals.*
Warden: *Gasps and straightens up.* The very idea! *Huffs with his hands on his hips.* I'll have you know that I am a grown man! *Shakes his finger in midair in a very old-fashioned way of making a point.* I can walk around town all I want completely unsupervised! *He doesn't sound angry, and he's not. He's just doing that automatically-appalled thing that he does.*
Once-ler: *Turns to face him.* Well, from what happened last time, you can understand why I wouldn't want you to be unsupervised around here. No slapping women! Or getting into trouble! This place is my place, it belongs to me its Thneedville. So I'm not letting you go out alone here.
Warden: Okay! Okay, geez, Mister Territory-Pants *Throws up hands in defeat.* What would you suggest? I'm not following you around all day doing accounts! *Grumpy face, hands on his hips.* If I wanted to do that I'd just leash myself to Jared's big, stupid head.
Once-ler: *Huffs in thought and thinks- that’s a good point. Then chuckles at the little Jared insult* It is big, isn't it?
Warden: Like, enormous, am I right? *Measures it in his hands, momentarily distracted.*
Once-ler: *Keeps laughing at him* Haha-! Totally~
Warden: *Frowns* Ababab! Don't distract me. *Grumpy point. However, throughout all this he's still been perfectly happy and in his usual safe half-sane space. No breakdowns or real arguments seem likely. He folds his arms.* Are you gonna arrange me a babysitter or something? *Sounds like he'll put up with it to humour Oncie's 'insane overprotectiveness'.*
Once-ler: Ppppffffff... *Rubs his neck* I don't know any-...I wonder who I could hire... *He ponders for a looong time, genuinely considering hiring a minder for his own boyfriend, which causes the Warden to almost start spluttering in incredulity, and then gives up with a little smirk.* Alright. *The smile drops and he looks him dead-on and serious.* You can go out alone, if you promise not to get into any trouble. No fights, no tantrums, nothing. *Smiles, softening his voice.* You gotta be good and polite and nice to people. You're not the Warden here, okay? You're Edmund Theremiah, so act normal and mature, okay?
Warden: *Squints in submission.* Fiiiine. *Hates the thought of being 'Edmund Theremiah'. It sounds boring and uninteresting, and he takes GREAT pride in never being boring and uninteresting.* Scouts honour. Best behaviour. *Stuffs his hand in his pockets and kicks a rock poutily.* I'll be good.
Once-ler: *Smiles at him calmly* Good~ Because you’ll be in trouble if you aren't, you hear me?
Warden: *Juts out his jaw in grumpiness again.* Yes Oncie. *Deflates slightly.* Stupid Thneedville. Can I go now? *Sounds so childish.*
Once-ler: Here, take this. Then if anyone questions you, you can just tell them that you know the Once-ler. *Reaches into his pocket and pulls out the pink truffula pin that usually goes on the lapel of his green tailcoat. *Strokes under the Warden's jaw and then pulls him into a little peck on the lips. Then tilts his head to the town.* Okay, off you go then.
Warden: *Blinks innocently when he sees the pin and takes it from his hand* Uuh- *The peck comes as a surprise, he pecks back with pink cheeks and a small eyelash flutter, then jumps up and down on the spot a few times.* Yeah! See you later, Oncie! *Pockets the pin and then leaps off to go and explore.*
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Once-ler: *Stood outside his factory gates in his green suit, all dressed up for opening his factory again. He's holding a pair of scissors, cameras are flashing everywhere and girl are screaming at him.* -And I am very proud to finally re-open the new and eco-friendly Thneed factory!~ *Cuts the red ribbon across the gate. People are cheering and photographers are flashing, journalists go to smuggle him.*
Lorax: *He's sitting on top of a small wall nearby, watching the proceedings. He refuses to go down just yet because he hates publicity- especially after the media circus he was dragged into when Oncie ran the factory before. All that 'Lorax approved' bullshit left a bad taste in his mouth. Still, he looks proud of him now and has already had a peek at all the inner workings of the factory. So far it honestly looks eco-friendly, and so he's very pleased. Cautious, but pleased.*
Once-ler: *After talking to a few reporters, talking to a few fans and signing a few thneeds, shirts, bra's and breasts, he eventually starts to bat a few of the bothersome public away.* That's enough attention for one day I think, thank you all for coming~ Once-ler out. *Enters his factory and shuts the door behind him, letting out a tired sigh as he does, but he straightens and walks to his office. He goes over to his huge balcony and leans over the edge of it, smiling broadly at the very few truffula trees that managed to survive his onslaught and then dropping his smile when his eyes fall on the many stumps he left behind. He chews on his cheek… He should really do something about them.*
Lorax: So! Looks like you managed to turn it all around, huh? *He's above Oncie's head, sitting on the top of the window-frame with his little legs dangling over the edge.* You look tired. You been eating properly?
Once-ler: Hm? *Looks up at him and smiles. He's gotten so used to the Lorax randomly popping up in places that it doesn't make him jump anymore. He can almost predict when it'll happen by now, which isn’t something he can say for the Warden just yet.* Oh, naah, I'm fine. It's just difficult to be in Superjail and have everything else here. *Rubs his face with both hands and yawns out a word-* Tiring. *Sniffs.* All these fans and reporters too. But I can handle them, no problem.
Lorax: *Jumps down and lands in front of Oncie's feet.* Aww, well make sure you get enough Zs, got it? I don't like the thought of you runnin' yourself out. *Turns around to look up at the much nicer factory and gives a low whistle.* You know, much as I hate commerce and capitalism and all that crap, you really have done me proud. This is somethin' good. *After how far they've come together, he knows that those words are ones that will mean the world to him. He looks back over his shoulder at Oncie with a smile.* So where's your guy? He back in that jail of his?
Once-ler: *Smiles broadly at him, feeling very happy with himself that the Lorax feels that way about his hard work. There’s a warm swell in his stomach at hearing those words of pride, and that sort of feeling is so rare to him. He goes quiet for a moment, so happy he's finally been able to please him and hasn't messed up this time.* No, he came with me here. But he's out right now to explore Thneedville. *His voice sounds a little unsure at the end, and his smile has relaxed a little. It's more like a slight mask over his worry.*
Lorax: *Sounds very sympathetic as he groans,* Uh-ooohhh... And Thneedville's still standin'? *Turns around properly to face Oncie as they talk.* Ah, he's probably fine. *Gives him an encouraging smile.* That town is harmless - he's the most dangerous thing in it. You've got nothin' to worry about. *Still sounds more like he's comforting Oncie than actually giving his honest opinion.*
Once-ler: Yeah, exactly! I'm not just worried about him, I'm worried about the town. He doesn't know this place very well and this place doesn't know him at all. *And maybe the fact that the Warden might be the most dangerous thing in Thneedville isn’t actually that reassuring.* But- yeah... I'm sure everything will be fine.
Lorax: And if not, it's nothin' you can't fix. *Gives him a grin and holds out a paw for him to take.* So! You got a kitchen in this place? I'm starved and I'm sure you owe me a meal for somethin' or other.
Once-ler: Haha- sure *Takes his hand but pulls him up onto his shoulder. Then walks back in, removing his hat and placing it on his chair.* So how've you been? I haven't seen you since I got my eyesight back.
Lorax: *Punches the side of his head gently.* And it's damn good to see you... Seein' again! You gave me the shock of my damn life. *Relaxes.* But I've been keepin'. Joints gettin' stiffer every day I swear to God. *Gives a happy hum. As old as he is, he's got a ton of years left in him.* But nothin' much is different. Had to screw with a couple of lumberjacks up in the Arctic National Preserve and then make it down in time to stop an oil drillin' down in the swamps of Tennessee. Whole lotta trekkin'.
Once-ler: *Laughs at his ‘seeing’ joke, and can only laugh more in relief at the fact that whole chapter is over now.* Aaah, man, that sounds like a busy day. *Pulls his gloves off and drops them onto his desk as he walks to the kitchen.* Did you fix it in the end?
Lorax: *Heavy sigh.* Temporarily. They're more thick-headed than you were. *Gives him a friendly hair-ruffle, showing that he didn't really mean it.* Just once I'd like a guy to go "Gee, maybe the little fella is right. Let's all go home and have some hot cocoa." *Pauses, then adds.* "And while we're at it, let's invite the little fella over for that, too." *Frowns* Geez, I really am hungry.
Once-ler: *Laughs.* That's where we're going now. Anyway, it certainly worked on me... eventually. And you can come to mine for cocoa anytime you want~ *Gets to the factory kitchen.* What do you wanna eat?
Lorax: *Jumps onto a countertop.* A cheese sandwich would go down well right about now. *Frowns to add gravity to what he's saying.* A responsibly farmed cheese sandwich. You humans have a way to make everything suspect. *While he still seems very proud and happy for Oncie, he's got the grumpiness of a guy who's just come of a far too-busy day's work.*
Once-ler: Uh- ahaha, sure.*Begins making him a sandwich, sometimes feeling awkward about his race when the Lorax starts complaining about them, but he supposes it’s justified considering what he himself did to his forest. It is the critters job after all.*
Lorax: *Bops up and down on his heels as he waits in excitement for the sandwich.* So how are things with you? Besides being all better? He proposed to you yet or whatever? *Sounds like he's kidding.*
Once-ler: Pfffthbth! *Gets a little embarrassed and shakes his head quickly.* NO! *Gives him the plate with the sandwich on and pouts with a raised eyebrow.* Of course not.
Lorax: *Cackles in a joking meanness before stuffing the sandwich in his mouth.* Well good. You're still far too young! *Points his sandwich at him... or the crust of it, which is already all that's left.*
Once-ler: Thank God! I hope that doesn't cross his mind *Scratches his neck and laughs.* I have a feeling I wouldn't have a choice if he demanded it, if anything because he’s such a romantic and he’d love an excuse to throw a party about us.
Lorax: *Gnaws on the crust of bread.* Would you say no if you had the choice? *Sounds amused and gossipy, but he's always been a little worried about their relationship. Anybody responsible would be.*
Once-ler: *Thinks to himself, tapping his finger on his chin, and then nods slowly.* I know we're like, together and stuff, but just feels weird to get married to a guy, ya know? My mom is really old fashioned in that way, *he sighs,* I doubt she’d ever approve of us, not that she approves of me much anyway. So I guess it's hard to think otherwise. *He shakes his head.* I'm way too young anyway to even think about marriage.
Lorax: *Nods* Smart. Don't tie yourself down to that place. *Still, his expression darkens.* Call me a new-age tree-hugger or whatever you want to call it, but your mom is full of trash. *Finishes sandwich decisively. He's had a long day, and he's not got the energy to put things in a nice way.* You marry a guy if you want to.
Once-ler: *Jolts at hearing the insult to him mom and then panics a little.* Hey! She is not. Don’t say that about my mom. *He’s still in some denial about who his mom really is. He always has been, but at the very least he just thinks it’s rude to say such things about a man’s mother. He’s still finding it difficult to digest what she really is.*
Lorax: Ppft. *Flaps his hand at him but doesn't press the issue. Recently he's been more respectful of Oncie's family- at least when talking about them to Oncie- but he has no patience for it today.* Alright, fair enough. The important thing is that you can marry whoever you want. Whether that be man, woman, or manchild.
Once-ler: *Still tense about that comment, but tries to get back into the conversation.* No- yeah, I know. And it's not that I wouldn’t want to some day... *Gets a little fuzzy feeling.* Like- it'd be totally awesome! I mean- so awesome! *Getting a little excited but relaxes.* And I would, just not now, not this early. I can't get married to someone who won’t say he loves me.
Lorax: *A biiig cat-like grin crosses his face when Oncie gets excited, but it falls immediately when he finishes that sentence.* Wait, what?! After all the crap you've helped him with he's still holdin' out on you?! The jerk! *Dusts his hands clean from crumbs.*
Once-ler: *Looks back at him wide-eyed and quickly realises he said that wrong, and tries to correct his screw up.* N- no, no! I didn't mean it like that. *Trots forward and puts his hands out to the Lorax* He does love me! He just cant say it. But he does. He definitely does! But he can’t admit it.
Lorax: *Squints at him, not sounding very pleased.* Explain.
Once-ler: *Cowers a little. He has no choice but to obey his surrogate parent now. He shrugs.* He- just can’t. He's very complicated. *He sighs.* Right, this is all very new to him, I think he has a real struggle about saying those words, he seems to think that every time he admits to loving something, he gets punished for it. *He frowns* His dad used to tell him it was bad, that it makes things weak and useless to know love. He trusts me more than anyone but its still in there. *That angry frown becomes a sad one.* I think he thinks that whatever he loves will always die, usually by his own hands, whether that’s forced on him or an accident or… I don’t know. *He looks to him with big remorseful eyes.* I think that’s another reason why he doesn’t want to admit it, I've been in more than enough accidents thanks to him. But he does feel it because he's almost been able to say it to me! It’s just that the words get caught in his throat.
Lorax: *Sighs. He's always had his worries, but he does respect that Oncie can handle it.* You'll be the death of me, you know that? *Gestures for Oncie to come over for a hug.* C'mere. Damn, kid, you've got a whole lot baggage wrapped up in this relationship, huh?
Once-ler: *Enters the hug like a normal grip, but half way though he hears that last sentence and his weight falls onto the Lorax in mental exhaustion. It does take a lot to handle the Warden, along with all of his other work, and he does so well to completely hide it that it never crosses his mind. No-one's brought it up before, not even himself, and to hear the Lorax so perfectly know him and know exactly what he thinks, it makes him drop it all out on him accidentally. Like it's okay for him to admit that it's tiring him. He doesn’t even have the strength to respond to that at the moment, he’s too bewildered by that last comment.*
Lorax: Woooaaah, you're okay. *Crumples a little with the sudden weight, but manages okay and gives him a big hug, stroking his hair gently once he's regained his balance.*
Once-ler: *Nods into him but doesn't leave the hug.* I'm fine- I'm fine.
Lorax: Of course you are. *Continues to stroke his hair, one little hand sorting out any stray flicks while the other just holds him.* But if you weren't that'd be okay too.
Once-ler: *Shakes his head.* It wouldn't. *He's not had a breakdown since he's been in Superjail. It's been a long time since he last snapped. He's had the odd cry every now and then, but that’s about it. It was probably when his dad left, or something his mother did, or most likely when the stocks of Thneeds crashed, not that they ever have in reality. There is always so much going on in Superjail, and as much as it all is too much for him sometimes, it’s as if it’s impossible to dwell on anything for too long because you need to be prepared for the next thing. Maybe that’s why it exists in the first place, to keep the Warden’s mind from thinking too much. In a way that’s good, but at the same time it forces a lot of things to become repressed and compressed, until suddenly, someone’s having a breakdown, whether that’s an inmate finally snapping, Jared returning to tears and drinking again, or the Warden literally falling apart at the seams and going on a crying-murder spree. And it was almost him the other day. If the Warden hadn’t been fixed by that rant then there’s a good chance the Once-ler would have given up too. It’s not just that though… How could he ever have the time to have his own breakdown when he’s so busy trying to help the Warden with all of his?*
Lorax: Kid, it'd always be fine. If it's not fine around your fella then it's always fine around me. I can take it. *Takes Oncie's cheeks and makes him look at him. He's frowning, but it's the frown of a kindly father, rather than any form of disappointment.* Bein' around him has turned you into one a' the most amazing people I've ever seen - he's challenged you and forced you to grow and, *he smiles,* now look at you. All grown up and already too good for anybody I can think of. *Rests their foreheads together, glaring at him straight in the eyes.* I can't tell you how proud I am of you. But part of bein' so strong and so capable is knowing when it's okay to stop.
Once-ler: *He hadn’t expected to feel a lump in his throat, and he doesn’t want to, but everything the Lorax says is exactly what he's been waiting to hear. He lets out a quiet, dry sob as he sighs out and then his arms loop around his fluffy friend and cling closely to him. It’s being told that the Lorax is proud of him, the Lorax proud of him after all he did to the forest, that makes a few small tears prick up at the corner of his eyes.* Th- Thank you, *He sniffs a few times, clenching his eyes shut in an attempt to blink away the tears, but a lump still resting in his throat.*
Lorax: *Gives a short chuckle that rumbles through his fur, hugging Oncie tightly.* It's what I'm here for. *Rubs the back of his head, keeping Oncie tightly pressed against his fluffy, warm body. He lets him sniffle all he needs.*
Once-ler: *Sniff against him and squeezes the hug for moments and then pulls away to wipe his eyes. His shoulders hang heavily but he sighs out and feels a little better.*
Lorax: *Smiles at him in a calm and loving way.* You gonna be okay tonight?
Once-ler: *Nods* I… *His chest shudders with an outward breath and he gives him a weak smile.* I should be.
Lorax: *Chuckles at him.* I'm sure your Warden won't mind. He might not even notice if you don't sniff too often. *Plods over to the roll of kitchen paper towels and tears a piece off, then holds it up for him.*
Once-ler: *Chuckles back at his little tease and takes the tissue to finish up mopping his eyes.*
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Once-ler: *It’s the evening after the Once-ler had finished sorting what he needed to in his factory, he’s been waiting at home for the Warden, but so far he’s heard nothing from him and he hasn’t returned from Thneedville. He’d tried to contact his communicator but no-one answered, he even went to look for him in Thneedville after work and couldn’t find him, he called Jared just in case he might have returned to Superjail for whatever reason and he was told they’ve seen no sign of him. As much as he wants to helicopter around him to make sure nothing bad is happening, he does want to trust him on his own- he doesn’t want to go back out to look for him and turn the whole town upside down, looking like a maniac in the process. It’s just that it’s getting to the point now, as he paces around the lower ground of his Lerkim and checks his pocket watch while the day gets later, that he really thinks he should go and turn the town upside down. He doesn't know what to do, he paces his living room while trying to think of a solution, his fingertips in his mouth to chew on and his eyes tense with concern. He thought he’d be okay, but now he’s disappeared and Once-ler doesn’t know what to do or where to go, and he has no idea why he let him go alone. He looks a bit of a mess, in his half/half outfit with his braces hanging down from his waist. Too worried to make himself look that presentable.*
*There's a brisk knock on the door.*
Once-ler: *Jumps a little at the knock and then goes over to the door, suddenly feeling a wave of relief as he hopes that that’s the Warden returning after his day out, but then he considers that it’s a little strange the Warden would knock when he would usually just stumble in and announce his presence. Unless he really took what he said that morning in his office seriously. He winces, straightens himself up and tries to make his appearance better, but he hopes to heaven that it’ll be his boyfriend. He clears his throat, and then opens the door.*
*Outside is a stern-looking, boring man in a white lab coat. He has thick glasses and looks like an immovable, business-like sort. He waits for the door to be answered before speaking, being too strict and professional to call through the house.*
Once-ler: *Looks the man up and down with a confused, slightly concerned frown.* Uuh... Can I help you?..
Doctor: *He nods, his face expressionless.* I am truly sorry to bother you, Mr. Once-ler, but I'm here on behalf of the Thneedville Psychiatric Institute. *Flaps his hand a little in small gesture.* Merely a formality we have to conduct, but we have a patient with us who insists that he knows you. You'll understand that we have a number of patients who make claims of knowing celebrities and usually we don't follow these accusations up, but he's been very insistent. *Coolly he reaches into his pocket and brings out the lapel pin that Oncie owns, the one with the small truffula tuft.* He also had this on his possession. We simply want to make sure that he's deluded, for the sake of his ongoing treatment. He claims to be... *briefly fishes for the word,* a jailer of some sort. *Seems a little embarrassed by how ridiculous a house call this must seem.*
Once-ler: *Squints and tilts his head at him as he listens, wanting to ask questions but they get answered straight away. His tongue goes numb, but he thinks for a moment that this could be a misunderstanding, but then he reveals the pin. He stares at it with horror and takes it slowly, his eyes having to be forced away from it to look at the man again. His stomach has been getting tighter all through this explanation, still clinging onto hope that this could still not be real,but his stomach plummets at the last thing said, and he stares at the man it utter shock, feeling sick to his stomach* No- he’s in a-? *He gasps, suddenly knowing what that means. He feels like he might be sick. He snaps out of it, trying to act sensible and try not to panic, but he is, and suddenly he grabs his coat and top-hat* Thank you. *Then bolts out of his house, almost knocking the man over and slamming his door shut.*
*This is his town, he funds all of its institutions, he practically runs it and he knows where everything is and the quickest way to get to places. In just a few minutes he’s at the asylum and bursts in, slamming the doors open as if anyone would dare to tell him not to. He’s The Once-ler, he practically owns this town, he built it into what it is today. If he wasn’t there then it wouldn’t be able to run properly without him, let alone have such a great economy, and everyone knows it. He bursts in, his tailcoat fluttering behind him like a demons cape and his hat stretched up to the ceiling as intimidating as one of his factory chimneys, puffing the smoke he burns to keep all these businesses alive.*
Receptionist: *Jolts upright at the sudden entrance and in a small explosion papers addresses him nervously.* Oh! Mr. Once-ler! Can I help you? *A few people are picking up and moving damaged furniture and strewn documents from the reception area- something akin to a hurricane passed through here at some point. Clearly the Warden didn't go down without a fight.* Th-this is very sudden- do you have an appointment? *Everything here is very normal and grey, though it does have the rounded edges and slightly off-kilter angles and asymmetry of any Thneedville building - nothing out of the ordinary as far as Thneedville goes, very professional. There's a small piece of very worrying information, however. Perched on top of the receptionist's outbox are the Warden's glasses- a glint of bright yellow in this otherwise drab place. Of course he wouldn't be allowed to wear them if he were an inpatient. They'll be taken to a small holding area until he's let go... but that could be any time.*
Once-ler: *He stops for a moment to look at the mess, he doesn’t even have to question it, he knows it was the Warden's fighting back that caused such a chaos and it makes him worry even more. Then he snaps his head over to the receptionist and struts over to her dangerously* Do I need a goddamn appointment?! Do you really need to ask me th- *Then his eyes catch the glint of yellow and they notice the Warden's glasses. His mouth goes dry and his eyes look at them in complete horror. Okay- NOW he’s panicking. And he whispers, terrified* Y- you-... took them off him.
Receptionist: *Recoils a little.* Uh, well yes! Of course! They'd be classified as... as contraband... sir. *Pauses and tries to avoid looking at him head on- intimidated by him immensely.* I assume... that this means you're here to see the man who was brought in last night? The, uh, *makes very, very meek quote signs with her fingers,* "prison warden"?
Once-ler: *Scowls at her when she quotes with her hands and places both hands on hers and pushes them down.* He is a prison warden, and everything he says is the truth. He knows me. *Clears his throat and tries to calm down- this isn’t her fault.* He was brought in here last night you say? Why? What for? *He demands an answer quickly.*
Receptionist: *Panics a little and immediately starts typing at the computer to one side, pulling up the Warden's record.* Oh, um. *Reads, readjusting her glasses* He was found at the scene of a fight. Apparently there were, uh, weapons involved. He was brought here instead of to the police station because... well... *She ducks a little, not wanting to be the one to say it.* He was claiming some rather outlandish things. I'm sorry, Mr. Once-ler, sir, but I'm not legally allowed to say any more than that. *Quickly adds, hoping to get rid of him as soon as possible.* Would you want to be taken to him now?
Once-ler: *Is about to snap more demands but stops immediately at the question. That’s definitely what he wants out of this, so it works to get him to go away* Yes please. Right now.
Receptionist: *Immediately snaps her fingers at one of the men in coats walking around.* Excuse me! Could you take Mr. Once-ler to see our newest patient? He's... uh... *She looks to the Once-ler and then immediately lies to make things easier.* Family! Yes.
Doctor: *He squints at the Once-ler, then takes some documents from the receptionist's desk. He cringes.* That patient? I'm afraid he's not approved for visitation right now. *He looks down at the notes and snaps them to a clipboard.* If you are family, we will require some... *Again his eyes rest on the Once-ler, knowing exactly who he is but being as careful as possible in regards to protocol...* Documentation.
Once-ler: *He doesn't like the way he said 'that patient'. His brow tightens and his shoulders stiffen at the resistance shown.* There is no paperwork because the man is no longer in contact with his biological family. I'm his significant other. We have photos together, his things are in my house, and the fact that you picked him up with my lapel pin in his possession and I'm not charging him for being a stalking fan but instead am here trying to represent him, should prove we have a relationship. *He breathes in a sharp breath and huff it out of his nostrils like a steaming bull. He tries to hide the pain in his next statement.* He has no one but me who can care for him. *He points his finger sharply down at the ground.* I demand to see him!
Doctor: *He appears completely dispassionate as the Once-ler talks, even though he believes the man is telling the truth - he is the Once-ler after all, everyone knows that and this is Thneedville - because this isn't a court of law and he isn't looking to be convinced. There is protocol to follow, documents to be inspected, because if they make a mistake by taking a shortcut then they could be sued into the ground.* You can demand all you want, sir, but I'm afraid that until I see documentation proving that your relationship is as you say it is, we can't allow visitation until he's gone through our screening process. He was violent with the nurses as he was brought in, and we have no guarantees that this won't continue to be the case. *When he says 'violent', it's highly likely that he just resisted them as they dragged him in.* He’s a very sick man.
Once-ler: *Takes a step forward assertively but not aggressively, and he cuts in before the man can really finish.* He won't be aggressive to me! *One eye squints and he snarls,* But alright, if you want to play that game, how about this for 'documentation'. When was your last unscheduled routine humanitarian check at this establishment, huh? *Straightens up and folds his arms.* By Thneedville law you're permitted to accept an unscheduled visit by a city representative to check that the treatments, handling and facilities provided to patients are humane and up to human rights standards at all times. *Places his hand on his chest and raises his eyebrow.* As the city's main representative, I've authority to instigate this operation when I see fit, as well as appoint the individual in charge of carrying it out, which can also be myself. So consider it your unscheduled investigation, and I request to see the most recent and most volatile patient checked into the facility within the last twenty-four hours to best review these conditions. *He frowns.* I wouldn't recommend objecting to this kind of operation, it tends to look very bad for an institution of people holding medical licenses.
Doctor: *His eyes widen. Oh crap. He straightens up coldly, his shoulders drawing back defensively and his chin lifting, and for a moment he looks him dead in the eyes, lifting his head slightly as if almost daring to challenge him before remembering who he is. Cold grey eyes unpleasantly squinting. They haven’t had an investigation in a long time. The cultural era that they exist in Thneedville doesn’t pay much attention to the well being of mental patients, but if he doesn’t let the Once-ler in to see just the one patient, then he might put a bigger focus on them overall. He might take it to the press and demand a large-scale investigation as revenge, but maybe if he’s let to see the one man then that’ll be all he wants. Finally he quakes, watching the Once-ler's bright blue glare, as the math clicks and he feels a tiny shudder rattle through him. He is the Once-ler after all, and he’s caught him in a bit of a tough place with all that practical, systematic business talk especially when he tried to just throw the same at him about protocol. He's forced to nod with a slightly unhappy curl to his nose.* Very well. Right this way.
*The receptionist moves to escort him, but the doctor holds up his hand.*
Doctor: No-no, I'll handle this. Right this way, Mr. Once-ler. *He turns on his heel almost like a soldier and glides on sharp feet down the corridors of the facility. He doesn’t seem particularly happy with the way the Once-ler has worked around the rules, but he can’t say anything, the man is too powerful. Never the less, he is hiding an attitude with a bitter sneer, holding his head up and glaring out the corner of his eye at the businessman. The doctors here don’t like it when outsiders try sniffing around their patients and the facilities, they just want to get on with their jobs, with unfeeling. What does the Once-ler anyway? He doesn’t know better than they could about this sick man and what he needs.* You will see that we have everything up to code when it comes to exiling lunacy. Out here are our less volatile inpatients, but I'll take you to our secure wing where the worst are. You’ll see, since you’re here to review our establishment, that the mad man you’re talking about is in the perfect place. *There’s the tiniest hiss sound from his nose that indicates a smirk. To him, the people here are nothing more than animals.*
Once-ler: *His eyes are just as unfeeling to the man’s opinion or reaction, even more so, because he owns this damn town and no-one dares to look at him like this man is daring to. He either doesn't know who he is, which is ridiculous, or he's the most stupid man on the planet to exist in Thneedville and look down his nose at The Once-ler like that. Especially when he's standing in the way of something the man wants and will take. He won't be stopped, nothing can stop him, the only thing this man will succeed in is guaranteeing to make his own life worse by trying to slow the businessman down. He lifts his own head and if he were some sort of demonic creature, his claws and fangs would be unfurling at him right now; he's lucky that they're meant to be existing in a civilised society else the Once-ler would have torn him to shreds as easily as the Warden does to the prisoners in Superjail. ‘The perfect place?’ He picked up on that vile, snarky tone towards himself and his boyfriend- his boyfriend who right now is vulnerable and suffering in his worst nightmare. One thing is for certain, this man is losing his job by the end of today whether or not he's taking him down to the Warden right now. He could write a very convincing report on him and have it approved in seconds. He's not in the mood to stare down a more pathetic predator that apparently doesn't know what lions nest it's poking at.* Good. *He says when the man states where he’s taking him, the word coming out as a stab as he follows him down.*
*Naturally he doesn't really care about the facility's humanitarian standards protocol right now, the Warden is the only thing on his mind and he wants to go there immediately, he doesn't even look around or pay attention to the man as he describes the hallways, but he will write a report like he promised once he has his boyfriend back, and as he makes his way through the corridors, he does start to see just how miserable this place is as well as hear the distressed sounds groaning from the rooms… It reminds him of Superjail on a slow day. Maybe he should investigate here- the thought comes to mind for a moment.
He's a man of doing things by the books most of the time, if he declares an investigation then he'll follow through, if he promises a report then he'll write one, but that's already played them perfectly into his hands now and he knows it. They might call his bluff here, thinking he's just using this reason as an excuse to get into the facility and humouring it to save their reputation, when really he wont write a report in the end. But they would be wrong to do that, because this isn't just a one-off excuse to get into the facility, he knows full well that he's opened up the door to further threats that he'll follow through with. Oh he'll write a report, and it'll drag them all through the mud so violently that they'll forget their names because his own will be etched into their ID cards like branded cattle.* Mh-hm. And Doctor. *That last comment stings. Do they talk about all of their vulnerable patients like that? He nods his head when he's told they're going to the secure wing. Then he looks to the Doctor and scowls at him like a feral mountain wolf ready to claw his eyes out. If he's going to get what he wants, people here need to remember who they're talking to in this city. He seethes with a dark voice.* Don't you ever look down your fucking nose at me again, and don’t you ever say anything like that about one of your patients either, or you can kiss your medical license goodbye. *He's lucky he's only losing his job, maybe then he'll learn the most blatantly obvious lesson of the town named after the Once-ler's very vision.*
*The doctor doesn't mess around, taking him straight to the room with their most volatile and most recent patient, but he nevertheless points out the important things as they make their way through - maintaining the paper-thin pretense of legitimacy. This place, like all of Thneedville, is filled with swirling tubes, old-fashioned copper machinery, big buttons beside each rounded door with chunky plaques declaring the rhyming name of each ward or in-patient. It's a large place, or maybe just seems that way because of its labyrinthine layout, but beyond pointing out the appropriate security measures, the basic facilities and gesturing towards continued areas of the building, the doctor says nothing. Like all of Thneedville, this place was sponsored by the Once-ler himself to some degree if not designed outright by him, so it's all good. It's just, unfortunately, old-fashioned.*
Doctor: *Turns when the Once-ler speaks to him. He doesn't expect the way in which he's spoken to, or the dark tone of the man's voice, and it honestly shocks him. He definitelydoesn’t expect the cursing, because thneedville is almost ‘family-friendly’ in the way it’s inhabitants barely acknowledge curse words to be a part of language. It makes him gulp. He isn't about to fight the man, both because he wouldn’t be that dumband also because he's a professional doctor in his place of work, and drops his steel-grey expression immediately. Suddenly his ego vanishes over realising how seriously the business man is about all this. He can’t even see what’s wrong with speaking about one of these patients like that- Is he actually going to investigate them?* O- of course, Mr. Once-ler.
*They get to the door at the end of the secure wing - another rounded door with a little, wonky, barred window, with a big red button to the side and a plaque that says 'Max Security'.*
Doctor: Here we are, sir. *He thumps his fist on the big red button, and the door swings open.*
*The Warden is lying on the ground of his padded cell, curled up and facing away from the door. It's difficult to judge what state he's in, but it's never a good sign when the Warden is sitting still. Sitting still and wearing a straitjacket. Only that and the hospital patient uniform, which is a grey and shapeless outfit with nothing to cover his feet. It's the last thing he'd ever choose to wear himself.*
Doctor: I have.. aah.. much to do, and he's not dangerous like that. *Likely he just wants to get the hell away from the lions gaze. He passes Oncie a small buzzer.* Let the nurse know when you're ready to leave- visiting hours shut at six. *Gives a small awkward frown* Usually patients in the maximum security area aren't allowed to have visitors in the first place, but since it's you... *He knows Oncie owns their ass. He won't do anything.*
Once-ler: *He gasps, his heart breaking when he sees that curled up, limp figure, and if he had zero social instincts, he’d have sprinted over and curled over him by now just to hug him up and protect him. Instead he takes the buzzer off of the doctor.* Right. Thank you.*He waits for him to leave and then steps into the room. His face drops at the sight, he can’t even see the Warden yet, and yet he can feel how much confused agony he’s in. Hopefully it'll be somewhat less painful once he knows that Oncie came for him. Taking a deep breath he goes over to him, his feet picks up with a desperate need to be with him but also not wanting to startle him with sudden movement, and squats next to him. Then places a very light hand on the wardens shoulder and turns him over to face him.* Warden? It's me, The Once-ler. *Gulps, his mouth is dry and his heart is racing.*
Warden: *He's easily rolled over, and the scary thing is that he doesn't even flinch at the sudden touch. He's limp and docile even though he's conscious. He does, however, immediately wince and let out a small, pathetic moan when he meets Oncie's eyes and their brightness hurts him. Without any usual trappings - no hat, no glasses, not even any fancy clothing - he just looks like a crazy middle-aged man. Not a rich eccentric, or some wacky visionary. Just a very tired and sad old man. Still, he loosely smiles up at his saviour, even if it doesn't look like he believes the other man is really with him, and even if it almost takes him a moment to recognise him. It’d have taken longer though, if it weren’t for those blue eyes. More like he's humouring his own mental images.* Hello Oncie~ *He speaks slow, like he's having to concentrate in order to form words. He then corrects Oncie calling him 'Warden'.* It's Edmund.
Once-ler: *He can’t stand to look at what’s in front of him and just wishes this was an awful nightmare, his heart pounding in his chest, chased by horror so fast that it’s begging his brain to wake him up. How could they do this? He knows he’s unstable, he knows he has problems, but he still can’t imagine something so bad, so depressing, so directly out of the worse pages of the warden’s worst fate, happening to his little bunny of a boyfriend. He has no idea what the Warden is thinking or what’s going on his head but he can see that he’s been completely sedated by them, bound and left in a dark corner- the poor thing. Once he's corrected and been told to call him by his actual name, he gasps and swallows as his heart thumps with grief and worry. He doesn’t know what that means, what state of mind that means he’s in, but he holds himself together and grips the Warden’s shoulder a little tighter.* O- okay. Um- E- Edmund? H-how are you feeling? *He’s not entirely sure what the hell he’s meant to say here, but it’s worth asking the question.*
Warden: *His body can actually be felt untensing when Oncie touches him - as defeated as he is, Oncie is still his safe place. Apparently it's so deeply ingrained now that it's instinct.* It hurts. *Sounds a little pouty, but not in the usual joking, playful way. It's the pout of a real child who can't handle what's happened to him.* This jacket. *Gives a very half-hearted fidget.* And.... everything is very... dull. *Shuts his eyes tight all of a sudden.* And too close. *Curls up a little more, tensing up again.* Right in front of me. *He has no shield in front of his eyes. Those glasses are a barrier that have always kept the world out, and kept him in a nice fantasy world. Now he's clamped up in a ball, eyes scrunched up closed.* I missed you. *Now sounds slightly blaming. He's jumping all over the place because he can't hold a thought in his head for very long.* Where were you?
Once-ler: *Watches him with concerns and horror, but then that blame comes and hits him to his core. He completely blames himself for the position the Warden is in, the guilt is starting to drill a hole through his chest, he hisses at the grief and pain in his stomach, but having it directly pointed at him by the suffering man makes it all the more real. He messed up. He shouldn’t have let him go out alone, he knew he'd get into trouble and now he might have truly scarred him for life. Sure, the Warden might have been erratic, but he knows how his boyfriend was last time, and he knows his townsfolk, and the only reason why he let him go along was because he was too focused on work. Now he’s kicking himself for it. The business isn’t important, the money isn’t important, this is important! He leans forward and presses his face to the Warden's, sliding his arms around him and squeezing him into a close embrace. He feels cold.* I'm sorry. *He gasps and shakes his head* I’m so sorry. I- I'm here now though. I'm here. And I'm gong to get you out, okay? *He plants a slow lingering kiss on the Warden’s head, one protective and promising, as he feels his throat close up.*
Warden: *Another small, sad whimper escapes his throat and he shuffles forward as best as he can into the cuddling and kissing. He's not quite coordinated to kiss back.* I.... *For a moment he sort of drifts off, like he's lost focus, but then he returns with a small shake of his head - like a nervous twitch.* I always do this. *His voice is quavering and almost a whisper. His body is trembling, too, weakened and reacting unfavourably to whatever cocktail of sedatives they've given him. The scary thing is, though, that even if he weren't drugged he'd probably be just as still and broken.* Why... why can't I handle being Edmund? *Presses his face into Oncie's collarbone. He has this low-grade terror running through him for as long as he's without his glasses, but after a whole day of that he's snapped and this has somehow made him okay to talk while internally screaming.* They said there's no War... Warden... but I'm not good at being normal. S- *He has trouble getting the last word out.* Sane.
Once-ler: *Hugs him tightly and lowers his voice, because that’s all he can do to force it to be comforting and kind rather than panicking. It’s what the Warden needs, but his chest is fluttering and there’s a lump in his throat.* I shouldn’t have said- I didn’t mean- *He tries to smile, feeling guilty for asking him to act normal earlier that morning.* You shouldn’t have to be normal because you're special, remember? I told you, people can’t see that yet. All sane people are boring anyway. *He tries to let out a little laugh but he pauses for a moment as his nose becomes tingly and he wells up. He stuffs his face into the Wardens neck and clings tightly onto him.* You are the Warden, he is real, and so is Superjail, and we’re going to go back there the moment I get you out. I’m going to take you home. I promise. *He searches for the buzzer and presses it to call someone in.*
Warden: *He's too drugged to cry, or even feel much beyond the floaty, hazy emotions he's swimming through right now. But he does feel Oncie's tears.* Don't cry... *Sounds like he's attempting to be comforting, even with his voice sounding half-asleep.* You're not in trouble... *He sees Oncie press the button and foggily realises that people are going to come in and interrupt them. He gives a short, futile, struggle.* No... no don't call them... I need to- There's something I meant to say. *Falters, looking scared.* I think... I don't know. *Winces.* It's hard to concentrate... *Slightly begging sound, like he wants Oncie to fix his head.* Oncie...
Once-ler: *He places his hands on the Warden's face and looks at him with worry, feeling a jolt of sickness as the Warden begs him.* What? What is it? *He breathes in and out heavily.* I- Its okay. I'm still staying here with you. I wont move an inch, so then I need them to come to me because I won’t leave you, okay? *He pulls him into his chest again and cuddles him. He’s going to fix this. He swears on his life that he’s going to fix this.*
Warden: *Looks very troubled, but also like he's somewhere else. He's not able to fight the drugs combined with the protective fog his brain is trying to wrap itself up with. It won't let him come to his senses, because if he actually realises what's happened and where he is there's no telling what sort of damage that'll do to him. He's already been utterly destroyed- this is his mind's last-ditch defense effort.* It's just... I...
*At that point two nurses come to the door and hurry in. The door is swung open, and just as the Warden immediately sees them, he pushes his head into Oncie's shoulder, diving as heard as he can into his protectors arms for safety and in a desperate attempt to express how much he needs him. He's so scared of them.*
Warden: I LOVE YOU! PLEASE DON’T GO!
Once-ler: *His breath chokes in his throat. It's as if everything’s suddenly gone silent, like time has stopped. For a moment he really thinks he’s in a dream, some twisted thing that is part nightmare and part everything he’s wanted to hear. But it’s not. The Warden said it, and he said it during the most devastating and horrible situation possible. He said it because he's frightened and confused and desperate, desperate for Oncie, the only thing that he recognises and trusts and loves, to save him from the white-coat monsters coming to hurt him again. His heart skips a beat in that moment of the world pausing, and then suddenly races forward as he comes back to reality. Emotions soar through him, grief and love, guilt and gratitude, horror and hope, and he wells up with large flooding tears as he clutches his soulmate so tightly in his arms that they’d have to kill the Once-ler to pry the Warden from him. Out of his cold, dead, greedy fingers, like all of his riches, except this man is infinitely more valuable to him than any dollar bill or any shining jewel.* I love you too! *He gasps* I love you so much, Edmund! I’m not going, I’m never going! I’m staying right here with you forever and I’m going to fix this, I swear! *He suddenly looks over his shoulder and snaps at the nurses like a feral animal.* GET ME HIS GLASSES! Don’t you dare even think about denying me!! *He’s never sounded so furious and threatening before, but he could make their lives a living misery if he wanted to, and if they do not obey him right now then he will certainly rain hellfire upon them all.*
*The nurses gaze at him wide-eyed - at the whole situation, really- and then scatter like frightened gazelle. The Warden will be getting his damn glasses back. There is no question about that.*
Warden: *Has his eyes tightly shut, not at all scared of the way Oncie is shouting. But he's still overwhelmed by this whole situation and has no energy or lucidity left in him, so he clamps up and burrows himself as close as he can into that hug. His emotions are still dulled by everything, but hearing Oncie talking to him - saying that he loves him and is going to take care of him and that he's never going anywhere - is affecting him so deep down that he starts crying even when he doesn't directly feel the emotions he's supposed to. He doesn't wail or sob, he just wells up and the tears stream freely. The emotions are so deeply there that even when he can't think about what it means, or even consciously feel them, his body reels under the effects of it all. He knows what he’s meant to do here, what his body wants, and what his heart needs to express, even in all the brainfog. He sniffs heavily, and a small pant of crying does make itself heard. It's a single bleat, a shudder of his shoulders, and it's all his damaged mind has left to give. He loves him, that’s all he knows to be real when he has nothing left, that’s what the thing that makes sense and knows to stay, and he’s so relieved Oncie is here.*
Once-ler: *Strokes his hand through the Wardens hair and rocks him back and forth, his chin protectively hooked over his head as the tears stream down his face.* Okay- *Sniffs again and leans down to plant kisses on the Warden's head, talking into his ear and doing his best to deliver as much comfort and love to him as he can.* I love you too. *Kisses him again and repeating the words as a mantra.* Everything's going to be okay, everything's going to be oka- ay.
Warden: *Nods pathetically into his front, trying to believe him that things will be okay, because the only hope he can hold onto now is that he trusts Oncie. His facial expression is blank, even though so much stuff is churning up inside of him. Oncie smells so familiar this close, and that particular sense is a vivid experience in his current state. Fresh grass, butterfly milk, sweet flowers, the forest- with a hint of smoke and copper from his factory, and a faint smell of the signature cologne he wears for business. It’s the most perfect scent in the world because its his, and it’s a lifeline for his muddled synapses to cling onto. He never wants to be let go from from this.*
*The nurses scurry back down the corridor for the glasses, they didn't even ask permission to take them from the front office - they just want to swipe them so that they can hand them back to the frightening man - but run straight into the doctor who brought the Once-ler here. He frowns and shakes his head - no. They're not giving an unknown and dangerously unstable man anything that can be broken into shards. It's policy. One brow raises up from behind his thick glasses, reminding them that this is their job, and they're not just here to placate the guy making the loudest demands in the room.*
*Besides, he thinks. They're just glasses.*
*The nurses twitter amongst themselves, because nobody wants to go back in there and tell him. As they twitter, one sneaks past and dashes for the front office because maybe if she can smuggle them in, the Once-ler won't fire her at least.*
*She gets to the front desk, reaches for the glasses stacked on top of the filing cabinet, but is then stopped by a wiry hand with sharp nails. Jumping a mile, she looks up into the eyes of a very severe-looking woman with horn-rimmed glasses, a grey beehive hairstyle, and a long, pristine white coat.*
Female Doctor: What do you think you're doing?
Nurse: Th-there's a very upset patient who needs them, Dr. Zazzerzump! And... *she hushes her voice* Mr. Once-ler demanded we get them!
Doctor Zazzerzump: Mr. Once-ler 'demanded', did he? *Her birdlike face hardens like thunder.* Is Mr. Once-ler the Medical Chief of this hospital?
Nurse: N-no Doctor. But none of us want to be the ones to go in and tell him-
Doctor Zazzerzump: Oh, for goodness' sake. *She storms past the nurse with clipped, high-heeled strides and heads straight for the secure wing.* And Dr. Snickberry-Shoo? What did he say about all this?
*She walks straight past Dr. Snickberry-Shoo as he continues to berate the nurses for trying to get past him. But when he sees his superior come striding past, he takes a step back away from her.*
*This might be the Once-ler’s city, but this is her hospital, and he can’t just waltz in and take a patient from one of their cells like the man belongs to him. His name is on their paperwork now, he’s in their branded straightjackets, he’s in one of their cell rooms, and he has a long, tiring schedule of tests, medication and treatments already being prescribed and planned that’ll last him years until he’ll be allowed to be released. Once he’s proved to be mentally unfit for the outside world, he’ll be institutionalised here, and then he’ll belong to her and to the system.*
*Although relief floods through The Once-ler to finally have his beloved safe in his arms again, this isn’t the end of the road like he hopes. He doesn’t realise the approaching battle coming on the horizon. He doesn't realise what a terrible ending they might be met with if he doesn’t win it. He doesn’t realise, that in a cruel twist of irony, the Warden might finally become the Prisoner.*
To be continued...
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imminent-danger-came · 5 months
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hiiiiiiiii im so mentally ill abt the swk-mk relationship from 1x09 into ROTSQ. wukong literally goes from having this “oh shit i Care about this kid” moment in 1x09 to Not Being There when mk faces off against the possessed dbk in 1x10. and then at the start of RotSQ they sit on that damn cliff again and wukong, for the first time, invites mk in, and we get to see just how lonely he really is. and mk’s about to leave, hesitates, realizes this, and Chooses to spend time with wukong. im so #normalgirl about them
(and also there’s tiny little origami versions of the original pilgrims in wukong’s little new year’s setup. and that’s just so everything to me)
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GOD.
There really something about that ROTSQ scene. The way Wukong comfortably turns as MK's stammering and trying to leave. He seems so...at ease in his loneliness.
I also lose my mind that their mini 4x12 training sequence takes place at the same temple:
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Sun Wukong: "I've been alive a long, long time. I've fought along side the Brotherhood and the great Companions, and now you. You may not believe it but you are all stronger than you know! Every one of you is already a hero—together you can do this, we can do this! Are ya with me!"
((*cough cough* "Just believe in yourself! Even a smidge makes all the difference." *cough *cough))
The contrast (and similarity) to their ROTSQ convo:
Sun Wukong: "I got you where I wanted you, by putting myself where you wanted me. It's called: misdirection." MK: "Seems like a shady lesson." Sun Wukong: "Too soon, buddy." MK: "UGH, I'm never gonna be as good as you." Sun Wukong: "Pst, not with that attitude!"
Their whole strategy in TEW was getting Azure where they wanted him, by putting themselves where Azure wanted their team. Really #normalgirl about it all
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dukethomas · 5 months
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duke? i know next to nothing about him and i'm curious <3
oh boy oh boy oh boy !!!!!!!! thank you for asking i love talking about duke
one aspect i love about them: i could list a million things rn but how about. this sense of personal responsibility that is both a strength and a vice for him but in a way unique to the "great power comes great responsibility" model of heroics. duke feels like he has this responsibility to better the world, he feels responsible for his loved ones and ppl he deems under his care, but not because he's uniquely special. instead he feels like it's something everyone owes the community. he monologues abt how you can make that choice, to choose to do good or inflict evil. he holds bruce to this personally--confronting him about using his amnesia to ignore his responsibilities as batman. he has the weight of the world on his shoulders and don't get me wrong he isolates himself like crazy and tries to tackle it all alone but it's because he believes this is just what everyone should be doing. he doesn't view himself as particularly special or powerful, this is just his job. his calling !!!
the rest of the answers under the cut bc i talked a lot
one aspect i wish more people understood about them: there's a lot of really obvious answers that i'm going to skip over bc they've been said to death. instead i think i'm going to say i wish ppl understood he's not like. the mentally healthy bat. when he's not doing so hot and crumbling under the weight he has put on his own shoulders he self isolates he gets snappy and bitchy and closed off he gets into fights he gets self destructive. he's allergic to asking for help. and also he is very frequently in a bad place because he's a teenager that's what they do + in comic time he goes through like. a traumatic event every month. his status quo is constantly changing because of the nature of comics but in universe that means the longest, most stable period he's had in a while is, like, the year he spent training with bruce wayne, inflictor of mental illnesses. come on now
one (or more) headcanons i have about this character: i will elaborate on this in a post sometime but i believe his powers are about potential. snyder lore posits that metahumans somehow are created by nth metal. proximity to nth metal sparks duke's powers in a snyder comic, and duke himself is a snyder creation, so i figure this implies duke has a unique connection to nth metal. which is where i believe his meta amplification comes from in batman and the signal, another snyder comic. maybe if i read more of the snyder lore than just the duke parts i'd understand it more.
regardless, this connection to the source of metahumans could mean a million things but in line with the themes in we are robin about choice, i think it indicates great potential in duke. also, in alternate futures for duke--tales from the dark multiverse & urban legends #8-9 outsiders story--his powers have increased substantially in different directions. in the dark multiverse, his first canonical powers are amplified so much he has to actively suppress them or else he. can't see. but also those powers fuel him with one key thing that leads him to be the last survivor of the multiverse, which is his hope. and then in urban legends, future duke is just a badass who is a powerful mage???? which is something duke becomes, once again, to survive the way the world becomes. taking from a canon example, ra's and ishmael are able to invert duke's powers entirely, giving him his umbrakinesis. literally what other meta can this happen to!! anyways, my headcanon is that because of his inherent connection to the source of metahumans, his great power lies in the potential to become whatever he needs to be to keep fighting the good fight. whatever he needs to be to keep trying to make the world better. i think in the canon timeline, where the future will never become desolate, where duke will never become so desperate, he won't need to unlock his full potential, and he wouldn't choose to, because he's not that kind of guy. but the potential simmers under his skin, waiting for when he does need it. when he chooses it.
one character i love seeing them interact with: how do i choose one. i'm going to speed run a bunch of them. cass & duke are genuinely such supportive sibs like they back each other up it's so nice to read!! my besties!!! bruce & duke is interesting in the way duke comes from the era where they start pushing the fanon batfamily more, and so you get a bruce that does seem more supportive, and it really is bruce's healthiest relationship w a mentee bc he 1) positively reinforces duke 2) has never beat him up nor tried to. low low bar. but you can still see. bruce harps on how duke's the future of heroism. how he is going to lead the way, how he's "something different." and he pushes duke, and trains duke personally and assigns him day shift and puts him on the outsiders. and duke feeds into that by insisting the mission IS bruce's responsibility. they make each other worse is what i'm saying. jeff & duke are fun for opposite reasons, because jeff believes in duke just as much but also can intervene and stop duke when needed. just a nice positive relationship with an authority figure for duke it's nice :D
one character i wish they would interact with/interact with more: pipe dream. renee. i have a very self indulgent au draft where duke becomes renee's mentee instead through sheer stubborn force of will and she is so annoyed with him all the time and also after the 5th or 6th time this teenager tracks you down as you work various cases you get a little fond. she'd never say that to him though are you kidding he'd get worse and more annoying. mainline renee and duke could have a fun detective story as well i think as two ppl with very different ways of operating who use their individual strengths to solve the mystery and also throws in juxtaposition of the ways their depressions manifest in there or smth. my other answer that doesn't throw my 2 dc faves together is duke meets anissa and jen pierce i think that could be fun!! jeff introduces them and then regrets it. also i wish damian and duke talked more after robin war the post-robin war dynamic that lives in my brain is great
one (or more) headcanon(s) i have that involve them and one other character: going to keep this one short bc i've said so much already. i headcanon the narrows as a large neighborhood in gotham and park row/crime alley as a smaller, really well-known part of that neighborhood, to avoid having 2 worst neighborhoods in gotham. anyways this means jason and duke grew up in the same neighborhood and oh boy do they rip each other a new one for that. half the time their convos are incomprehensible to non-narrows residents bc it's just insults from coming from opposite sides of the neighborhood and those insults are very narrows-specific. jason texts duke during the climax battle in batman and the signal and goes "how tf did you let narrows go to shit your first day. i wouldn't have let this happen. crime alley kids are just built different ig"
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nyhti · 6 months
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Oh! I forgot to respond! Anything would be cool for you to share. I love your headcanons for Scarecrow so anything like that?
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I'm more shy about sharing Hugo headcanons, because we get very little canon information about pre-crisis Hugo (the Hugo I base my version on). With characters like Jonathan, who got an actual backstory, hobbies outside their gimmicks and what not, you have something to build your own headcanons around. You can come up with something, that wasn't in the original text, but that makes sense given what we know about the character. The headcanons are plausible and connected to canon, even if by a very, very thin thread. No such luck with Hugo. Because we know nothing about him, nearly every headcanon feels like it was pulled out of nowhere. It's not based on anything, because there's nothing to base it on. Coming up with headcanons for Hugo doesn't feel like expanding on an existing character, it feels like coming up with an OC.
So I'm a little shy to share the headcanons that are ”out there” to me (i.e. things with no canon basis), but I guess I can scrap together something lol xDDD I'm sure we all remember the iconic quote ”I am a model of mental health!” from Gotham Knights #8-11 ”Transference.” Even if you haven't read the story, you have surely seen this panel floating around:
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And I like it. It's a funny line, but then there's also this exchange from Batman #356 ”The Double Life of Hugo Strange”:
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Of course these are two different continuities, one pre- and one post-crisis, but it's still interesting how differently two people can write, what is supposed to be, the same character. The attitudes the different versions hold toward their mental health are like night and day. Usually in moments like this, I would simply pick one of them for my own verse, but this time I loved them both so much, that I just couldn't choose and so for a while I wondered how I could somehow have them both. I solved it by deciding that over time, Hugo's attitude toward the subject would change. It goes from ”I am a model of mental health!” to ”Does it matter?” In my verse, he begins to struggle with his mental health around his twenties. Back in the day, I used to headcanon he didn't start having symptoms until in his fifties, around the time we meet him in my verse, but I figured it works much better, if it started at a younger age. So, he has manic episodes. In his twenties, they weren't very severe yet. He did have a couple short hospital stays a few times when it all started, but symptoms really cleared up after finding the right medication. The hospital stays, however short they were, were not easy for him, though.
At first, he would try to deny there was anything wrong and that bringing him to the hospital was a mistake. The doctors would disagree, though, and after a week or two on medication, Hugo too would start to see that the way he had been acting wasn't normal. This is all very difficult for him, because he's a high achiever, a perfectionist. He needs to be the smartest, the strongest, the most powerful. He needs to be in peak psychical and mental condition at all times. He had a lot of great goals in life that he wanted to accomplish and ending up at a psychiatric ward most certainly wasn't one of them. It was a huge blow to his self-esteem. It really shook the mental imagine he had of himself. I'm sure he thought that mental illness is something that happens other people, people below him and so this was a bit of an identity crisis. I don't think he ever even thought about the pain the actual symptoms had cost him, all he ever thought about, was the pain to his ego brought on by the stigma of mental illness. I think another element that made his stays difficult, was that he was in med school at the time. It felt wrong to be the patient. This is not the position he had been studying for years to reach. I can just imagine young Hugo screaming at his psychiatrist: ”I am a model of mental health!”
Over time, however, especially after the medication proves so effective that Hugo can almost forget that he ever had episodes in his life, he would begin to accept the diagnosis, but only as a thing of the past. Something that he beat. He would still not be open about the diagnosis. If anybody ever asked him where he had been during those hospital stays, he would think of some convenient lie. Regardless, I think it is his own experience with mental illness combined with his general interest in the human mind that inspires him to specialize in psychiatry. I also think that he's stance on mental illness and mentally ill people would also soften. It has to, really. If he thinks mental illness only happens to those below him, does that mean he himself has now sunken somehow? Become less because of this? No, that can not be, he has to be the best, so clearly mental illness can in fact happen to anyone. Even the best of us. (I am now going to talk about how his illness developed and affected him later in life and for this, you need to keep in mind, that my verse is build upon pre-crisis continuity, so before deciding he wants to be Batman, he was a ”regular” criminal mastermind, only after money and power. He is sent to jail once Batman caught him and it is only years later, that he ends up in Arkham.)
In his late forties, when Bruce has become Batman and Hugo is arrested for the first time, his symptoms would start breaking through his medication. In these stressful situations his episodes would become more severe and start lasting longer. Since Batman was the first person to expose him and bring him down, he makes it his next goal to destroy him. It's really the only thing he can do. There simply cannot exist a person better than him, because he has to be the best. Also, he cannot let someone who humiliated him so live to tell the tale. And on a more practical level, he simply can no longer pull any larger jobs in Gotham City with Batman around, so getting rid of him becomes a necessity. It's during these fruitless struggles to beat Batman, that he starts experiencing psychotic symptoms for the first time. Around this time he also discovers Batman's identity and dons on the cape and cowl. At this point, he is about 50 and is admitted to Arkham for the first time. Ending up in prison was bad enough. His license to practice medicine was taken away, he was exposed to the world as a criminal and a heinous person, but it was still only prison. Prison couldn't take a way his believability among other criminals. Arkham is different, though. Ending up in the city worst ”nuthouse” not only made him lose respect and status among criminals, but also in his own eyes. It was an incredibly hard blow to his ego. Twice as hard as ending up at a psychiatric ward in his twenties.
At this point, he had been a psychiatrist for many years. If it was difficult for him to be the patient in med school, imagine how difficult it is for him now, especially when he now finds himself the patient in the exact field he specialized in.
And just as in his twenties, he would have to re-think his opinions on mental illness, and once again, the re-thinking comes from necessity. After the new medication helps him see things clearly again, there is no denying the fact he had been experiencing psychotic symptoms. What kind of a psychiatrist would he be, if he still tried to deny it when it was all so clear? He really came up against a wall here. His only options were to lie down and die or accept it and move on, to ask the world, to ask himself: ”Does it matter?”
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matataku-hoshi · 9 months
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Groundhog Day at the Old Vic, London 2023
*dusts off the old blog* It's certainly been a minute, hasn't it! Still here, still a huge GHD fan. In the intervening years, I got to see productions at San Francisco Playhouse and at the Paramount Theatre in Aurora, IL. (I also got married and went through a bunch of other life stuff, but that's neither here nor there). But then it was announced that Groudhog Day would be returning to the Old Vic in 2023 with Andy Karl, and my husband and I used that as an excuse to finally do that UK trip we'd been talking about for years.
Tumblr user colemckenzies did a great post outlining some of the changes between Broadway and 2023 Old Vic. I wanted to further elaborate on some additional changes I noticed. Obviously spoilers to follow:
In “There Will Be Sun”, the first chorus of “Tomorrow spring will come and then there will be blue skies my friend” is cut. It goes straight from “If not tomorrow then tomorrow or tomorrow there will be sun” to “Oh if I could I’d will these clouds away my love”
While obviously the revolves are gone (look at me picking up British-isms 😄), the bedroom set gets wheeled in every loop. They keep the trick from Broadway where this is always done counter-clockwise until the loop finally breaks.
As previously mentioned, there’s a wonderful lyric change in Day One. “Their dumb superstitions and vacuous chat, their total unawareness of the fact their trapped, perhaps you don't miss it if you don't know you lack it, I'm sure there was a pack of xanax in this jacket'
I adore this because of the foreshadowing, and how Phil thinks he’s singing about the townsfolk when he’s really singing about himself.
Dialogue change in 2023 when Phil runs into Jonathan:
Jonathan: “Off to the see the groundhog?”
Phil: “Why, isn’t there a tractor pull or a cow-tipping contest?”
Jonathan, looks confused: “I don’t think that’s today.”
When Rita introduces  to Phil on Day One and reminds him of the flood story, Phil takes a second before recalling, groans, and goes, "Oh, the intern? They didn't even send me a real producer." After which Rita corrects him that she's a real producer now, albeit an associate producer. 
On Day 2 when the sheriff drops his gun, Phil asks "How do you have a permit???"
At the end of Day 2, Rita sings “I mean he acts kind of asshole-ish still. I think he might be mentally ill.” While it’s on the cast recording and the early previews bootleg, I could have sworn it was cut in the final Broadway version. Regardless, it’s restored in the 2023 version.
Phil’s “Help me~~~~” at the end of Day 3 is cut.
In Philandering, they cut the line where Phil "proposes" to Nancy (which I prefer - no one is that stupid, and they make the point later that Nancy is more than a caricature)
Also in Philandering, you can hear the chorus singing, “Gonna party like it’s no tomorrow~~~” in the party scene (formerly the orgy scene). Phil also gets 10 pizzas delivered to his room.
Phil is less aggressive when he confesses his “love” to Rita in One Day. 
On Broadway, they sit down directly on the stage, and Phil leans sideways to Rita to confess. As he gets more desperate, he starts to position himself over her and tries to take her hand, after which she slaps him.
In 2023, they’re sitting on a bench together. Phil tries to take her hand, and she pulls away and slaps him. Still creepy, but much less heading in the direction of sexual assault.
Either way Phil totally deserves to get slapped. I’ve talked to a few people who have said they could never root for Phil because of this scene (which is a fair critique). The 2023 version IMO makes the same point without so much portraying Phil as a potential sexual predator. 
Right before Phil smashes the alarm clock at the end of One Day, he yells “Make it stop!” (“Somebody make it stop”? Memory is a fickle thing)
When Phil kills himself with the gun before Hope, it's more explicit that he stole the gun off of the sheriff with his faulty holster.
I don't remember if this is new, but when Phil wakes up at the beginning of Hope, he touches the side of his head where he shot himself and even though he knows that the day will always reset, he still looks a little surprised and it's heartbreaking. 
For the third death/revival in Hope (where Phil climbs the ladder):
Broadway: Phil reappears in bed
Old Vic 2023: Phil reappears on the scene of the broadcast, fully dressed
As noted, lots of changes to If I Had My Time Again. 
Cast recording: "The thing with these revolving rides / they're only fun because you know they're going to end"
Broadway (as of early in previews): "I was completely dead inside / But today I'm like 85%"
London 2023: We're back to the cast recording lyrics.
IMO the orchestration and lyric changes are for the better. I adored this song on the cast recording, but in the August Wilson theater it frequently felt swallowed up.
With the emphasis on just Phil and Rita, it’s a much more intimate song, which is what the scene needs IMO.
I also love Rita’s new lyric “Go to all the parties that I missed / Kiss all the boys I was too afraid to kiss”, because then it’s Rita fulfilling her “time again” when she kisses Phil during Seeing You.
After "If I Had My Time Again", Phil eats a carton of Ben & Jerry's while discussing the almanac with Rita. I love the implication that he’s eaten all of this junk food before, but he’s trying it again with her.
Dialogue change after "If I Had My Time Again" 
Phil: "You know, Larry, we never really talk."
Broadway Larry: "Sometimes I think you don't notice that I'm there."
London 2023 Larry: "Well you never brought me donuts before."
Not a change, but I was sitting close enough one night to see the stock photos they use for Ned’s wallet pictures of his kids, and I realized that “little Mary” is just a baby. It really hit home that Ned has probably just lost his wife in the last year or two, and he’s trying to raise five very young kids on his own.
In the Broadway/cast recording versions of "Philanthropy", you can hear some melodic callbacks to earlier songs. In the London 2023 version, the chorus actually sings lines like, "I'm not sure what the point is / But this point is it don't matter" and "If I had my time again I would not do it all the same"
There's no pause of silence before "Seeing You" starts
After Phil and Rita run off into the snow at the end of Seeing You, the couples left dancing are Nancy/Larry, Debbie/Fred, and then Mrs. Lancaster dances alone in the snow in joyous wonder. I love this bit, becuase it feels like all the different ways you can find a new meaning of love (Nancy/Larry, the couple just discovering each other, Debbie/Fred, who have moved into a new phase of their relationship, and then Mrs. Lancaster, who even as an old woman can revel in the beauty of the snow)
In 2023 when Phil takes Rita to see the sunrise, he makes her cover her eyes, and then unveil them once the full sunrise is in view. It’s very sweet.
Anyway, I love this show, and I love talking about this show, so please feel free to hit me up! I may post more general thoughts, etc. if anyone is interested.
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Oh, thank you, my day is good, but after your message it got even better! I really found solace on Tumblr, which I could not find either in these terrible comics or in LOTR. To be honest, I hardly mastered the latter at all, literally forcing myself to watch series after series, searching in vain for the former depth of characters and conflict. In my opinion, LOTR is a complete failure on all fronts, with the exception of high-quality drawing. If it's about comics, it's an illogical development of events, which, unfortunately, is laid down in the last series. I wanted to ask you -how do you feel about Ursa's line? I was offended by her decision to leave the children (of course, it happened against her will, but still -to change her face and personality, forget about her beloved son and lead a happy life with an old lover?! Don't get it wrong, a woman should suffer for the rest of her days because of a failed marriage, she should not give up happiness if fate sends. But in the context of this story, in your opinion, does it not look like a betrayal, first of all of herself (Ursa?), and of course her children. She couldn't help but understand what kind of hell they got into, first of all the son, after her disappearance. And if you also disagree with this "canon", what would you see the fate of Zuko and Azula's mother? (sorry for such a long letter!)
hi again! thank you, you're so sweet!
i 100% feel you on both LOK (i'm guessing LOTR is a typo?) and the comics. it's so disappointing because both the show and the comics have some great conceptual ideas, and in the hands of competent writers, could've been excellent continuations of ATLA and worthwhile successors... but instead we got a flaming pile of garbage that deserves to be at the bottom of the sea.
the search isn't the worst atla comic imo (that honour goes to the promise) but it's definitely doing its damn best to earn that spot. i hate so many things about that comic: the outdated, insulting depictions of mental illness and mental healthcare in azula's story, zuko getting a "replacement sister" in kiyi as a fix-it bandaid, the fact that it becomes a whole gaang adventure when the correct narrative choice would've been for zuko and katara (and maybe azula at most) to take this trip together as a full circle from the southern raiders, katara and sokka's only role in the story being to foil zuko and azula and nothing else, and of course... the complete annihilation of everything ursa's character was set up to be in atla.
i agree with you that it is very much a betrayal of ursa's character for her to willingly lose her memories. she knows she's leaving her children in the hands of a dangerous abuser, one who's already molding her daughter into a lethal weapon and was fully ready to murder her son, who has proven his willingness to sacrifice his children without hesitation if it benefits him. but despite this, despite the fact that she committed murder, accepted exile and even risked her life (for she had no way of knowing if ozai would simply let her leave peacefully) to protect her child... suddenly she's willing to throw all of that away and fuck off with her childhood lover at the first opportunity?
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it baffles me why bryke didn't at least make ursa's memory loss an accident, which would've both explained her absence and why she never went to look for her children without committing character assassination in the process - but that's probably expecting too much logical writing from those two.
i'm actually planning a post-canon book 4 zutara fic that would include a rewrite of the search, where ursa didn't just fuck off to do nothing, but actually had a redemption arc very similar to zuko's after secretly fleeing to live in the earth kingdom and seeing the damage the war had done. she takes it upon herself to right the fire nation's wrongs, and grows particularly invested in air nomad culture, seeing it as her duty to try and bring back some of what the genocide had destroyed. shortly before zuko's banishment she sets out to find the remnants of a people long believed to be gone - and finds that maybe they're not entirely gone after all.
i won't spoil the rest, but i think it'll both explain why ursa never went back for zuko and azula while still giving her a meaningful story that didn't involve just swapping one family for another. if only we'd gotten something similar in the comics but alas... bryke gonna bryke.
thanks for the ask! no worries about it being long, i thoroughly enjoy reading your thoughts <3
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tongues--and--teeth · 7 months
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Fuck i fucking love your art smmmm
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Berserk boi
QUICK GIVE ME ALL YOUR BERSERK CACAOO HCSSS
Oh my god! Thank you so much! This totally made my day <33333
I'm so sorry this took so long, I've been really busy lately :(
(TW for gore mention)
So actually I headcanon that his berserk form is connected to his soul jam. Kind of like a little side effect. Y'know what use is a sword if not to harm others? If not to shed blood? (and also this sword hurts its owner too!) and it's the soul jam of resolution which is also dictionary definition, literally a firm decision that you're unwavering in. If Dark Cacao ever goes back on his decision to take the sword, guess what! He goes berserk until it consumes all of his life force and kills him. woo. 
He used to be able to control the berserk form a little, being able to turn partially into it to fight and stuff. He did lose the power to do so as he got older. Turning into his half-form and full form basically torturing him every time he tried to use it. It also completely removes pretty much all mental capacity for intelligent thought, so he can't use it in a "productive" way even if he wanted to. Basically just blind destruction with no distinction between friend or foe. 
(^that's actually the concept for the drawing you saw)
Personally, I have his berserk form more or less as kind of an allegory for illness, a physical manifestation of internal pain. He was making it a fuel to keep going instead of actually confronting the “bad stuff” that happened. He was taking how it hurt him and using that to keep going, instead of confronting it head-on and getting it to stop hurting him. Eventually, he couldn't keep doing this, it was destroying him and he was losing control. So now, he couldn’t use it for anything, aka, his pain isn't useful anymore. Anyway, he does still transform into his berserk form (albeit unintentionally) but only during times of extreme stress and triggers like certain sounds, textures, and tastes. It's also triggered through more physical means, if he stands too long his legs start turning to smoke, if he fights too long his eyes glow white, it's torture every time. In very special cases (Pomegranate Cookie) he goes full berserk, it usually takes him out for weeks, unable to do much, hardly able to take care of himself, much less able to make himself useful as a king or as a warrior.
Actually, after he stopped going berserk back in book 14, I think he was cut open pretty much everywhere underneath his armor. His guts were spilling out, and were barely contained by his armor. It basically cut him almost completely in half. He still managed to fight afterwards, obviously at great personal cost, but he was still able to fight. Weeks after, he could barely move, he was stuck in bed, and even small things like sitting up were a huge struggle. The only reason he's not dead is because of his soul jam, the same reason he was cursed in the first place. His immortality at the cost of eternal suffering and the like.
After book 14, he forces enough energy to attend the council of heroes (AKA Cookie Odyssey chapter 1) but the smallest things keep setting him off, turning him slightly berserk every time. He is spending every second he can lying down in his tent. It prevents his wounds from healing, and it also keeps him from thinking clearly. When he tried killing Clotted Cream the, admittedly very little, healing that was done was immediately reversed. He ended up barely functioning, with the only reason he was able to continue with the council was because Hollyberry noticed him limping and had Pure Vanilla heal him. Which only did so much, because it’s…A curse that's both caused by and stopped by his immortality, and you can't just fix that without probably killing him instantly. So, he doesn’t have a permanent solution, and he’s stuck with this until the end of time.
Thank you again for the ask. It was really fun to do! Sorry again for taking so long to finish it :(
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Natsume's Book of Friends Reaction Blog - Episode 1
(Below the cut as to not destroy my followers' feeds)
My pure unfiltered thoughts, in chronological order, for Episode 1:
[DISCLAIMER]
oh great we're starting off by calling women despicable--i see how it is, show /j
"just think of all the babes and bikinis you'll meet" what an odd sentence
ooh i love natsume's eyes
they're like a bronzey copper
"is everything okay with you? since you're, like, covered in dirt" "i'm good. anyway--" natsume my friend you were just running from something that called you a despicable woman
"what's weirder: the weather, or natsume" my man is running for his life don't bully him too
nevermind natsume is yokaiphobic. kill him girls
RIP bozo he didn't even make it to a shrine
well that was a short anime
ARE YOU DEADNAMING HIM?
HIS NAME IS NOT REIKO!!!
oh god we have an evil advisor yokai edition
everyone keeps misgendering my man natsume this is so sad
AND they're misogynistic towards him
unbelievable
my poor man
"lets tear out her tongue so she can't utter a word" MY MAN CAN'T EVEN SAY HIS PRONOUNS?
KICK TO THE EYEBALL RUN RUN RUN
oh god this kid has been seeing The Horrors
Takashi Natsume... we have his first name, folks
this poor fucking guy
he gets misgendered and misnamed several times
he gets slammed against a tree and probably breaks several ribs
he's threatened to have his tongue cut out
he has been seeing yokai since he was a kid and was labelled mentally ill and attention seeking for it
he just tripped over a giant rope and landed on said probably broken ribs
THE TRIP JUST UNLEASHED A DEMON
AND INSTEAD OF DOING ANYTHING HE JUST LOOKS IN FEAR AND SAYS "ah. here we go"
THAT CAT DEMON IS SO FAT??????
the smug fat cat demon: "are you not afraid?"
takashi, clearly dissociating: "i'm just used to it, that's all"
HIS NAME IS NOT REIKO!!!!!!!!!! LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!
my god the entire yokai world is trying to either deadname or convince him he's a transwoman named reiko
oh that makes more sense. his grandma is reiko. but now this just says more about reiko if her grandson looks practically identical to her???
"unlike humans, we do not concern ourselves with things as inconsequential as gender" based???????
DAMN THIS CAT DEMON REALLY DID JUST CALL HIM A LONELY BITCH
oop cat's gone
"i'm fit as a fiddle, honest!" (had all the experiences above)(takashi you are either Lying or very out of touch with what it means to be fit)
oh AND he's an orphan too
leave the cat in the wall
GIVING A CAT WATERMELON???
> calls it the book of friends
> is a roster of every yokai his grandmother took down in combat
AND THEIR NAMES BEING WRITTEN DOWN BOUND THE LOSERS TO HER FOR LIFE
BASED GRANNY
EVIL ADVISOR DUDE IS BACK
TAKASHI MY MAN HE JUST TRIED TO EAT YOU
oh wait he actually listened to me
the way takashi takes physical pain/damage is so concerning to me. he is constantly falling/running/getting squeezed to death and he just brushes it off afterwards but it isn't in a plot armor-feeling way. it's in a way where it feels like he's just not processing the pain and that's Worse
"and if i happen to die in the process, then so be it" TAKASHI PLEASE
CHOMP HIM
Super interesting first episode!!
Other thoughts now that the episode is done:
I love the animation--I'm by no means someone who can really tell good animation from bad animation because all animation is really cool in my opinion and it's hard for me to usually distinguish what's stylistic and what isn't, but NBoF's animation is so simple but pretty to me??? Like I love the way Takashi is drawn and how he's so deeply expressive with micro-expressions that are usually hard to make on anime faces without being super exaggerated. It has a cozy slice-of-life look but then it hits you with what i saw above and I'm like????? curious to see if it goes further with "Takashi Natsume experiences the horrors in a nice setting" or if it cools down and becomes much more chill with time. I'll have to see but I literally have NO clue
And because you specifically requested this, @versaphile! Hope you enjoy :)
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my-castles-crumbling · 2 months
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hey cas,
so, i dont really know exactly how to word things right so please bear with me while i try to explain a bit.
i think i have bipolar disorder (or something similar, im still looking into things), but i dont know if im just going crazy and imagining things. theres not really anyone in my life i can talk to about it to gauge their opinion, so im kind of left by myself to deal with it.
i dont have a trusted adult or loved one i can go to for help, and ive not been to a doctor since probably 2017 at the latest so im not even sure who id be making an appointment with to discuss anything like this. ive considered trying to get myself into therapy but im afraid that if i go in saying that i think im bipolar and have other mental illnesses (im about 99% certain i have anxiety and likely some sort of depressive disorder too, but that might be more linked with the mood swings of bipolar) that its the wrong way to go about it? like, i might just be really ignorant but i dont think thats how therapy works is it?
basically im worried that if i go in saying the disorders i think i have, then theyll tell me im exaggerating or that i need other people to back me up or that i do need to see my gp doctor (which, again, i dont actually think i have one) or that it isnt my place to try to diagnose myself etc.
im not really sure what im asking here? maybe if you have any advice/experience about what therapy is actually like or what i could expect? or a better way to go about getting help? i really dont know honestly aha, sorry
Well, you've definitely come to the right place lol, I've been to and ghosted many a therapist! (Don't ghost your therapist!)
Actually, recently I started therapy again and it's been a great experience, so let me tell you about it. Warning: I live in the US, so if you live elsewhere, it might be different.
When you start therapy, they're going to ask you a LOT of questions. Lots about your background, your childhood, your feelings, etc. It'll feel a bit invasive, but make sure to be honest! Like brutally honest. Like if you're like...'I might be feeling this way but idk if I'm faking..' tell them that. They need to know everything.
Then, if you're a minor, they'll talk to your parents and get their insight. If you have issues with your parents, make sure to tell them that BEFORE this part happens, so they can take what your parents say with a grain of salt.
Last, they'll give you a 'tentative diagnosis.' This means that this is what they think you have, but it's not a die-hard medical diagnosis. They'll treat you based on this, but if you ever wanted accommodations in school or anything for it, you would have to go to a clinical psychiatrist to get it written up.
Here's the thing: the diagnosis my surprise you or even make you feel invalidated. If it does? Tell them that. Because, two things: One- they may have gotten something wrong. Or two- they need to know if you aren't understanding something fully.
To be very personal, I am diagnosed with both depression and anxiety. When I started therapy recently and again got those diagnoses, I wasn't surprised. But I also was told I have 'illness-anxiety disorder' which is the new term for a hypochondriac. I was super insulted because I was picturing the stereotypical hypochondriac who fakes illnesses for attention (this was uneducated of me) but my therapist explained that this version of anxiety more means that I have a lot of anxiety related to being nervous to get sick or the results of getting sick. Which was like- oh. yeah. I do panic every time someone sneezes on me. My therapist said this has become increasingly common since COVID.
All this to say it sounds like seeking out therapy might be a great way for you to get the answers you're looking for. But even if they're not the answers you think they'll be, remember that your feelings and experiences are still extremely valid and no less real.
<3 <3 <3
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haleigh-sloth · 1 year
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I'll take the bait. How is rei's hospitalization not supposed to be something that helped her? The reason she was put there was crazy sure (the one that needed some hospitalization was always endvr) but its not like her kids forgot about her in the end. Also I believe the long time she was there was just for narrative purposes because hrks wanted her to be away.
Sorry I was gonna get around to posting it, I was tired yesterday lol.
I understand it's shown that she got better there. But I don't think enough people understand that 10 years being locked up in an institution is very fucking abnormal.
There is NO type of psychotic break or mental health break down that should lock you up for a fucking decade, unless it resulted in something serious like someone's death. And there is a reason that there is a shift from hiding people away to shifting them back into their community as soon as possible in several countries (not just the US), OR keeping them out of the hospital in the first place with research based protocols. Rei shouldn't have been separated from Shouto for 10 years. That is insane. That literally will make any parent more ill. Every mental health model you read up on will have an emphasis on a support system which usually consists of friends and family.
Endeavor put Rei in a hospital to get her out of his way, not because he gave a shit about her wellbeing.
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Idk if Caleb put a twist on this or not, but it doesn't matter because the obvious tone here is "Oh, I got rid of her, she was getting in my way." Not positive. Then:
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This is not a happy picture. I mean hopeful yes, but Shouto saying "I'll save her" while she's sitting in this small ass room, alone, staring out a window? I mean this is not...good. TEN YEARS???? I just cannot fucking fathom anyone justifying keeping someone (especially with Rei's circumstances) there that damn long. Holy shit.
And I mean, this isn't even a cultural debate. This is straight up not good for a person's wellbeing, to be separated from the real world, including your damn children only to have to wait for your older kids to decide to come visit you--and only when the hospital will allow it-- for ten years. But if we're gonna talk cultural, look up Japan's average psych bed ratio in comparison to other countries. Their reputation is not great lol. And I've seen plenty of commentary saying Rei's character kinda represents Japan's poor mental health care. It's just commentary so it's not fact or anything, but it's interesting I'm not the only one who thinks this about Rei, and I wouldn't be surprised if that was the intention.
BUT, anyway honestly the reason I said that is because I see a lot of "I hope the villains get what Rei got 🥺". And I hate it. Because...she was locked up. Away from her family, no freedom.
Like if the manga is going to go for a "I'll save them no matter what" ending, then why end it by putting them in a place where Shouto felt like he needed to save his mom from?
Also...I mean please. This is shonen, it's a fantasy. We don't have to stick to realistic irl answers to shit. Jail is just stupid, but the hospital ending is even dumber imo. Especially if we're talking ten years like Rei--who was put away by her husband for the purpose of keeping her away from his children.
I mean, let's say we stick as close to realistic as possible without going the jail route--hospitals aren't therapeutic, that's not a healing setting. Mental health care is a community action and the idea is to get people back home with their support systems as quickly as possible. AND! If that's the case then damn, at least show ALL of the UA kids getting their damn counseling sessions too since they've been in two wars? And seen dead bodies of their loved ones? I mean, go all the way with it. But! I have 0% expectations of that happening. So...it's STILL dumb.
Just, I'd rather Horikoshi just go balls to the wall with the fantastical power of love and friendship and acceptance ending. Personally I have no desire to see Tomura or Touya or Toga or anybody end their story in a freaking hospital bed. Just, why. Give them hugs, hold their hands, and send them on their merry, unrealistically sappy way.
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