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works-of-fanfiction · 10 months

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Kiss and Make Up || Daniel Ricciardo x Reader

Summary: With the couple on a break, it’s hard for Daniel to see Y/N, especially when she’s looking so good in his favourite dress.

Song: Kiss and Make Up - Dua Lipa & BLACKPINK

Warnings: 18+ oral (f receiving), unprotected sex. A little bit of swearing.

Word Count: 3.6k

a/n: I think (???) I’m getting a little better at writing smut. one day I swear I will write one without giggling after every sentence. enjoy!

Daniel's blood boils as he watches her, watches his girl at the centre of attention of his fellow drivers. He wants to be angry at her for entertaining them in the first place, but he's angrier at his so-called friends for gawking at her and passing off their obvious flirting as 'just being nice'. It's annoying because she knows she looks good - incredible, in fact - an emerald green satin dress hanging perfectly on her body, displaying just enough leg to be considered dangerous. It bothered him even more that he chose that particular dress, and now she was parading around in it for everyone to see; for everyone to stare and drool over her. He didn't like it one bit, but he didn't have a choice.

It was his fault that they were on a break. He'd lashed out, said horrible things. Tension had been brewing between them for a couple of weeks and she could sense he was about to burst. She hadn't done anything wrong; he could see that now. He'd had more than enough time to sit with his thoughts and come to regret everything he'd said, but she hadn't been interested in hearing his apology. At first, in his anger, he'd blamed her friends. He was convinced their influence had led her to her decision, that they'd been whispering in her ear and plotting against him for some time. However, deep down he knew it was nobody's fault but his own.

The 'will he, won't he' situation at Alpha Tauri had gotten the best of him. His overwhelming desire to race took up all of his attention, leaving Y/N completely on the sidelines. She'd understood, of course she had. Racing was Daniel's dream and she knew how important it was for him to find a seat and get back out on the track, but when things seemed to get difficult and look uncertain, Daniel directed his frustrations towards her.

"You're a fucking coward, d'you know that? Who are you to stand here and speak to me like that?"

"Oh, drop the bigger person act, Y/N. It wasn't too long ago that you were going through a rough time and - "

"Don't you fucking dare. You know that doesn't compare to the way you've been behaving. It is completely different."

"You know how important this is to me. Sorry, but I think I'm allowed to be a little stressed." He held his hands up in mock surrender which only irritated her further.

"A little stressed, yes. A total asshole? No."

"Where are you going?" He asked, watching her scoop up her phone and keys from the counter and stuff them into her pocket.

"Anywhere you are not. I can't be around you when you're like this, Daniel." Her voice cracked as she turned away, but she didn't allow him to see her cry. He may not have approved of her being the bigger person, but it's what she had to do. A text a couple of hours later confirmed her need for space, and after spending thirty straight minutes trying to type a response, Daniel realised he had to respect her wishes.

“Here.” Max interrupts, sliding a drink into Daniel’s hand.

“What’s this?”

“I couldn’t stand and watch you stare at her any longer. At least with a drink in your hand you actually look like you’re at this party and not just a creepy stalker.” He chuckles into his glass, the joke going over Daniel’s head, not even bringing the slightest smirk to his lips.

Max gulps, wincing a little at the strength of his drink. “Just go talk to her.” He says, eyes flicking between his friend and Y/N.

“I can’t. She wants space and I have to respect that.”

“Yeah, but anyone can see you’re not okay with that…”

Daniel knew Max had a point. As much as he wanted to give Y/N the space she needed and do everything he could to fix their relationship, he hated being away from her. He hated sitting across the room whilst she pretended he wasn’t there. She hadn’t looked at him once throughout the entire evening and it was starting to aggravate him. He needed to talk to her, even if it was just to find out how she was doing. He didn’t even know if that was a question he had the right to ask, but he wanted to anyway.

Plus, the way she was strutting around in those heels and playfully fixing her hair every few minutes was driving him insane. His eyes couldn’t resist following the trail from her feet, up her legs and to her hips. If she so much as leaned over the bar or stretched to grab something, he’d see beneath the thin green satin and hopefully find out she was wearing tiny, or perhaps no underwear.

He fidgets uncomfortably in his seat, setting his glass down on the table before his knuckles turn white from gripping it so tightly. As Y/N takes Carlos’ hand and twirls beneath his arm, Daniel jumps up from the stool, holding onto the table to steady his feet. “Hey, come on. You know they’re good friends.” Max warns, holding an arm out to try and stop him.

“Make your mind up, Max. You told me to go and talk to her.” He doesn’t even look at Max as he speaks, as his gaze remains fixed on Y/N whilst she dances with the Ferrari driver. There’s nothing suggestive between their dance, and it’s not the first time Daniel has seen them together like this, but he’s suddenly not as comfortable with it as he usually is.

“I think you should calm down a bit first.” Max tries to be stern with the older driver, but he knows his words are going through one ear and straight out the other side. Daniel glances at the Dutchman and gives only a second of thought to his words, then chooses to ignore them entirely.

Stepping past Max’s arm, he makes his way into the crowd and closer to Y/N. Mid-conversation, Charles and Pierre’s heads turn to the Australian as he weaves around clumsy partygoers, almost parting the room in two to get through. The two of them shuffle closer to the bar to get a better view as he reaches Carlos and places a hand on his shoulder.

“Can I cut in?” He asks, once again not bothering to look at who he’s speaking to. Instead he looks down at Y/N, who glares up at him with cold, unblinking eyes.

“Sure.” Carlos mutters, stepping aside, failing to notice Y/N tightening her grip on his hand to try and stop him. Daniel takes his place, his hands awkwardly hovering near her waist.

“Are you going to wrap your arms around me, or just stand there?” She asks abruptly, her tone coming out a lot more aggressively than she’d intended.

Daniel’s hands find her waist and pull her closer, making sure no one else can hear their conversation. Her hands are pressed against his chest awkwardly, all attention concentrating on her feet so she doesn’t fall.

“What do you want, Daniel?” She sighs, exasperation and downright exhaustion evident in her voice. This makes Daniel’s stomach turn and part of him wants to fall to the ground and beg for her forgiveness. He never thought he’d see the day when he’d be the one to make her feel like this. She was disappointed in him, and he was kicking himself for ever uttering a bad word to her.

“I need to apologise - “

“No, you just needed to get me on my own away from the guys.”

Her icy tone catches him off guard, but he feels he deserves it. As much as he’s desperate to finally apologise, he can’t deny that seeing her spending her night with everyone but him was making him jealous. He’d watched her friendships with the drivers blossom over time, especially Carlos and Lance, yet seeing their arms around her and smiles aimed in her direction tonight drove him crazy.

“Am I wrong?” She mocks, reluctantly wrapping her arms around his neck for the sake of her own comfort.

Daniel chooses not to answer, which is an answer in itself. She sniggers, looking off to the side to see the group all engaged in conversation with one another. She knows they’re all putting on an act and pretending not to eavesdrop. Those drivers love a gossip just as much as the next person.

“I don’t like seeing you with them.” Daniel finally admits, his voice low. He doesn’t intend for the entire grid to know his business.

“It’s never bothered you before.”

“Well this time is different.”

“How?”

“Because you’re not speaking to me.”

“And whose fault is that?”

Silence falls between the couple, Y/N’s hold around Daniel’s neck loosening. He reaches up and grabs her hands, readjusting them and holding her wrists tightly. “Don’t.”

“Don’t what?” She asks, glaring up at him, a devious smile poking at her lips.

“Don’t try to walk away from me.” He lets go of her arms, letting them float down to her sides as he leans in close, lips pressed against her ear. “Especially not when you’re dressed like that.”

She scoffs, rolling her eyes at his words. A poor and sorry attempt at winning her back, yet completely expected from Daniel. “You think sex is going to fix this?”

“Who said anything about sex?” He plays dumb but she sees straight through him. That had always been a thing in their relationship; they were both terrible liars, or rather couldn’t lie to each other as the other could always spot it.

Stepping back, she calls over to Kika who’s stood between Pierre and Charles, tracing circles around the rim of her glass. “Bathroom.” She smiles and Kika nods, slipping away from the table.

Daniel sees this and steps forward, blocking Kika’s path. “Actually, she doesn’t need you to go with her.”

“Daniel - “ Y/N snaps, cut off by his arm linking with hers and pulling her in the direction of the bathrooms.

“Come on.” He barges through the doors, squeezing the two of them into the first stall and turning the lock.

“I can’t believe you just spoke to Kika like that.” She whispers angrily, yanking her arm out of his grasp.

“She’ll get over it.”

“Pierre won’t.”

Y/N folds her arms over her chest, leaning against the flimsy cubicle as Daniel’s eyes wander around the small space. She sighs, heels scraping against the ground as she stands back up straight. “Well you got me here. What do you want?”

“You know what I want.”

“Actually, I don’t. Did you bring me in here to apologise… or was there something else?” There’s a shift in her tone and a look in her eye that Daniel instantly recognises. He knows she’s still angry at him, but sees there’s a part of her that wants him just as much as he wants her.

Sparing her a proper response, he slips a knee between her legs and pushes her against the wall. It shakes a little, encouraging a small smile to appear on her face. “You disappoint me, Ricciardo.” She purrs, running a perfectly manicured finger across his jaw.

“Something tells me you’re not so disappointed.” He grinds his knee upwards, pressing it against her clothed pussy. She groans, body slumping forward in pleasure. He catches her with his chest, pushing her back up, keeping her upright against the wall. “Does that sound like the moans of a disappointed woman?”

“Shut up.” She hisses, delicate fingers wrapping around his throat to pull him in for a kiss. Daniel moans, the sound strangled as her nails dig into his neck. The kiss is entirely in her control as she holds him in place, squeezing his throat just enough to make his breath hitch. She draws back, sucking his tongue between her lips and letting it go with a quiet popping sound.

“If we do this, it doesn’t magically fix anything.” She breathes, releasing her grip on him to rest her hand on his chest.

Daniel is smart enough to know better, and knows that hasty sex in a bathroom stall isn’t going to mend all of their problems, but he’s too turned on and fuelled by liquid courage to care. Running his hand over the top of hers, he links their fingers and flips her around to face the wall, pressing her palm flat against the cold wood. She yelps in surprise as he uses his free hand to hike her dress up. He’s delighted to see the black lace that’s barely covering her, and he hooks his forefinger through the waistband to pull her ass towards him. “Planned on getting lucky tonight, huh?” He taunts, his fingers tracing the patterns in the lace.

“I was hoping one of the guys would take me home.” She quips sarcastically, bending over more and grinding her ass against his hand. Daniel groans, letting go of her hand so he can use both freely. He grabs her ass and spreads her legs, his mouth falling open at the sight of her pussy peeking through her underwear.

Wasting no time, he drops to his knees and pushes the thin string to the side, giving him full access to the part of her he needs the most. Feeling his hot breath against her exposed cunt, she gasps, parting her legs even further. “That’s it.” Daniel hums, taking his middle finger and running it slowly through her folds. Y/N’s legs quiver as he touches her, barely inserting a finger as he concentrates on circling her pussy and feeling just how soaked she is. His finger eventually finds its way to her clit, flicking gently against the swollen bud, making her whole body twitch with arousal.

She moans his name, the word elongated on her tongue. He stops for a second, lying his hand flat against her core. “Shh… You don’t want people hearing us now, do you?” He whispers.

Squeezing her eyes shut and biting her lip to suppress any further sounds, Y/N nudges Daniel with her leg, urging him to continue. Instead, he grabs her thighs and pulls her closer to him, her feet sliding along the slippery tiled floor. “Let me taste you, baby.” The sound of his voice disappears between her legs, her thighs almost cupping his cheeks as he finds her clit with his tongue. The tip of his tongue swipes across her clit, slowly then repetitively in a rhythm. His hands hold onto her thighs tightly, his fingers leaving indentations in the supple skin.

Y/N sinks her teeth into the back of her hand, trying her best to stay quiet. Saliva and bite marks cover the spot just above her wrist whilst Daniel buries his head further and laps up her pussy like a starving animal. His nose pokes between her folds, and the newfound friction elicits a heavy exhale from deep within her chest.

Desperate to keep that nose she loves so much as close to her as possible, she reaches behind to grab Daniel’s head and guide him to the perfect spot. Fingers tangling in his hair and clutching at the roots, she rides his face, relishing in the feeling of his tongue flat against her clit, and the tip of his nose pressing into her. Daniel holds his breath as she ruts her hips against his face, gripping her thighs until it hurts. She winces, tensing the muscles as she rests her forehead against the wall, teeth still gnawing on her hand. He grunts, the sound sending a vibration to her clit and throughout her entire body, making her knees buckle beneath her. He catches her, supporting her body with his hands alone as he delves his face deeper to suck her clit into his mouth.

Losing all sense of caring, Y/N lets her hand fall free from her lips, releasing a stifled moan that echoes around the bathroom stall. Her thighs squeeze together involuntarily as she comes, and Daniel has to prize them open to set himself free. He stands, hands fumbling with his jeans as he sloppily lays kisses on the back of her shoulder, his chin still slick with moisture, so much so that Y/N can smell her own scent filling the air.

“What did I tell you about staying quiet?” Daniel whispers, his lips barely touching the back of her ear.

“I’m sort of sick of you telling me what to do.” She retorts, attempting to hide the shakiness in her voice. Daniel rolls his eyes, trying to ignore her words as he pushes his jeans and boxers down his legs, leaving them bunched around his ankles. He knows she’s not just talking about the present, but he’s too desperate to feel her wrapped around his cock to let it bother him. He hasn’t been able to touch her for weeks, and seeing her spread wide for him like this is enough to almost push him to the edge already.

Hands gripping her dress around her waist, he pulls her towards him, sliding his cock inside her effortlessly. Mutual gasps of pleasure and hissed curse words slip off of their tongues as he bottoms out inside of her, his clammy hands losing grip of the satin. Reaching round to grab her arms, he crosses her wrists and holds them behind her back, forcing her cheek against the wall to support her upper body. There’s an aggression to his actions, one hand holding her wrists and another snaking its way into her hair. Tugging her head back, he leans forward, his face beside hers. She looks at him through her peripheral vision, a smug smile on her face as she notices his slack jaw and half-lidded eyes. Daniel was never truly in control when it came to Y/N. The effect she had on him was dangerous and made him want to do things unimaginable. All she had to do was look at him a certain way and he’d literally and figuratively drop to his knees for her.

Daniel’s slow thrusts tell her that he doesn’t plan on lasting very long. Despite his tight hold on her and rough fingers in her hair, his hips roll in leisurely circles, the tip of his cock stroking her g-spot in a deliciously torturous rhythm. The restroom door creaks, a collection of footsteps clattering along the floor outside. With shadows passing the stall and voices filling the space, Daniel drops his hand from Y/N’s hair, instead using it to cover her mouth and keep her quiet. She tilts her head, sucking his forefinger into her mouth, her tongue wet and warm and making Daniel’s cock twinge inside of her. He moans, trying to swallow the sound so nobody will hear.

Daniel’s wet finger trails out of her mouth and down her neck, drawing a line of her own saliva along her throat. Wrapping his arm across her upper body, he holds her close as he fucks her, the heat between them making his shirt stick to his chest. Beads of sweat run down the back of Y/N’s neck and under her dress. Even beneath the harsh bathroom lighting, her skin glistens and looks good enough for Daniel to taste, to lick clean.

Voices gather at the sinks, water running and paper towels unravelling from the holders. Daniel silently prays for them to hurry up and leave, the feeling of Y/N’s pussy clenching around his dick becoming too much to bear. The muffled sounds of the music outside briefly fill the room, before disappearing behind the door. He releases his breath with a long groan, his body slumping against hers. “Finally.” He hisses, stepping back and pulling her ass with him, bending her into a perfect L-shape.

Relieved to be alone again, their pants and moans circle around the stall as Daniel drives his hips back and forth, quickening the pace. His firm grip on her ass cheeks leaves little white outlines around his fingers as he coaxes himself to climax. Hearing the sweet sounds coming from her mouth sends him over the edge, his thighs stiffening as he comes inside her, his body jolting forward in ecstasy. She straightens, resting her body against the wall with Daniel pressed against her back, his sweaty forehead slumped onto her shoulder. He pulls out with a huff, his cock leaking with cum and legs feeling sore.

Y/N readjusts and pulls her dress down, smirking to herself as she feels cum drip out of her and pool inside her underwear. She runs her hands through her hair, hoping she looks presentable as she turns to face Daniel. He zips his jeans and smiles at her, but doesn’t earn a smile back. “I told you, this doesn’t change anything.” She states flatly, reaching for the lock. He stops her, taking her hand in his.

“Come home with me.” He pleads, running his thumb softly over her knuckles, a stark contrast to the way he’d touched her just a few minutes prior.

“You’re kidding, right?”

Daniel’s expression remains serious. He opens his mouth to repeat himself, but she cuts him off with a defeated sigh. “Fine. But we leave now. I don’t need to be dealing with questions.”

“Deal.” He smiles, earning an eye roll from her as she unlocks the door and heads out, her heels clicking against the tile. He follows close behind, the satisfied grin never leaving his face.

#f1 x reader #daniel ricciardo x reader #f1 fics #f1 oneshots #daniel ricciardo smut #f1 smut #Spotify

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bellysoupset · 22 days

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Ahh love Max already! 😍 Would love a part 2 with Vince driving and taking him home, him just being so dazed and nauseous the whole time

Typed at the speed of light, part 2!

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Max wasn't sure which way was up and he was fine with it. As far as he was concerned, he really didn't need to move for the rest of his days. Not when every single movement caused his stomach to surge up his throat and his belly to complain loudly.

There was a noise outside of the nurse's inner office and Max forced the eye that wasn't currently pressed to the thin pillow to open. His sight was blurry and it took him a minute to realize that the giant at the door certainly wasn't the insufferable school nurse, Mrs. Doyle.

"How are you?" Vince's voice was soft, but it still felt like his whole head was gonna explode from the tone. Max curled up, pulling his knees to his chest and shivered violently.

"Dying."

Vince chuckled at that, "yeah, okay-" he crossed the room and Max let out a groan as he felt the guy's huge hands on his arms, forcing him to sit up.

The movement made his head swim and the blonde let out a groan as his spine all but gave up on him, his face mushing on Vince's chest.

At least the guy was quite comfy, Max thought sleepily, sinking into his warmth-

"Hey," Vince patted his cheeks, "wake up, c'mon."

"Gonna hurl," Max groaned, grimacing at the patting sensation and forcing his eyes open again, "my gutssmessed up."

Vince snorted, "I really don't think you have anything left to puke. Where are your car keys?"

"You robbing me?" Max frowned, beyond confused and Vince's eyebrows took a dip at the middle, before they cleared up.

"No, you idiot, I have a motorcycle. I can't drive you home on that."

"Ah," Max nodded, then pressed his forehead to Vince's shoulder again and let out a heavy sigh as he felt the nausea come back up, "you should... move."

"Car keys?" Vince squeezed his nape and Max let out a little burp, feeling his whole body jostle with a hiccup.

"Ba-AG!" He hiccupped mid sentence and let out a groan as the act brought up another burp and with it the taste of his lunch. He knew having lunch was a mistake when his belly had already been super unsettled in the morning, but Max had simply blamed that on five beers he had had the previous night.

Alcohol always messed up his gut, he had no idea why he continued to drink it. But then again, almost everything in excess messed up his insides, he was used to it by now.

"In the bag... Teacher's lounge..." Max squeezed his eyes shut and gulped down as he felt his mouth fill up with spit and his tongue curl. He let out a little moan, feeling hot all over and then retched, his stomach squeezing painfully.

Nothing came up, but that didn't stop his body from trying again and again.

"Yeah, I got his address with Shelley," Vince's voice drifted through the open door that led to the front of Mrs. Doyle's office, "unless he moved and didn't notify the school, I know how to get there."

The nurse answered something, but Max couldn't hear her as yet another heave hit him and this time he did manage to bring up some meager amount of bile. He whined, opening his eyes and letting out a relieved sigh as he realized Monacelli had put the trash bin between his legs.

"Alright," the other teacher said, walking back in the room, "let's go."

"Can't- can't-" he gulped down twice, in order to force just the words up and not more stomach lining, "can'tmove."

"I can carry you," Vince opened a smug smile and Max' ears burned with embarrassment and humiliation. The fucking asshole was enjoying himself.

"GoUrp-" he interrupted himself with another retch and dived for the trashcan between his knees, coughing and heaving until a weak splash of chunky vomit fell inside of it. Max let out a groan, feeling utterly humiliated, "please, just kill me."

"Are you done?" Vince asked, ignoring his whining and Max gulped down, forcing up a little burp and then nodded.

"For now... Don't feel empty thought..."

"How in the hell?" Vince frowned, but stepped closer and pushed the large trashcan out from between Max's legs and then grabbed the other man by the waist, pulling him to stand up, "let's just get you in the car, okay?"

Max ducked his head and closed his eyes, vertigo be damned, as Vince pulled him into the hallway. His feverish mind kept flashing back to the classroom and the fact he had gotten ill in front of all his seniors. He was so fucked.

He hoped he could get a whole week off, because there was no way he'd be able to face the kids just tomorrow.

"Alright," Vince patted his shoulder and suddenly Max's body was put gently against cold metal, "you good to sit in the car?"

"Are you a doctor...?" Max forced his eyes to open and rubbed angrily at his forehead. Monacelli was fucking fretting over him and they didn't even know each other. For the second time even!

"What?"

"You're all over me," he cleared up, "were you a doctor in the army? What's up?"

Vince's eyebrows raised, "I'm... I'm being a decent person?" he cocked his head, "you don't have anyone to pick you up and you hurled all over and you're burning up. You'd rather I called a cab and that's it?"

Max frowned, feeling a jolt of annoyance. He knew he had no one to come get him, he really didn't need to be reminded of that.

"Yeah," he scoffed and Vince rolled his eyes.

"Get inside the fucking car."

"This is kidnap," Max groaned, but did fall into the passenger seat and closed his eyes, "you're kidnapping me as revenge for breaking your arm."

Vince chuckled at that, the sound too loud in the cramped space of Max's pick-up. He slammed his door shut, "oh yeah, all I ever wanted was to kidnap my middle school bully."

Max groaned at the word bully. He had been called this before, you didn't stay in the same town your entire life and not deal with the fact you had made some kids' life hell. He was aware he had been more than just a prick when he was 12, but that didn't make him feel any better.

At least most of the kids he had bullied had either moved out or forgiven him. Some of them were parents whose kids he taught now and that made parent-teacher nights extra awkward, but only fucking Monacelli was his coworker.

"I'm really sorry about that," Max grumbled, pressing his overheated forehead to the window and gulping down as the car movement made him even queasier, "and today."

"Today's not really your fault," he could hear Vince shrugging, "so you live here all alone? What's up with that?"

Max frowned, wiped the sweat that was collecting over his lip and lowered his window to get some cold air and hopefully push back the nausea, "it's not- It's not all alone," his stomach turned and he breathed carefully through his mouth, "my mom lives here still. Dad next town over."

"It's just you? No siblings?" Vince wasn't bothering to hide his curiosity and Max shook his head, planting his sweaty hands on the dashboard of the car and glaring at his boots. Someone had wiped them clean, probably the janitor. There was a big dark wet spot at the toes.

"No, it's just me."

Vince didn't say what he was thinking but Max really didn't need him to. He had been a teacher to Sophia and Livia for the past three years. He was well aware the Monacelli family was as tight as they came. Hell, he had heard about Vince before ever meeting him, the football star who got himself a full ride, who was now coming back to be a teacher.

Their principal, Fernanda, a woman in her early forties who had an upbeat, hip attitude, and was entirely the reason for Max getting hired in the first place, had been terrible eager about the new history teacher.

Max thought Vince's entire concept was so fucking annoying.

The car took another turn and his stomach sloshed, gurgled audibly and caused Vince to squeeze his arm, "you holding up?"

He nodded, blowing out a burp under his breath and gulping down the stomach acid trying to creep up, "how much more?"

"I think we're here..." The car slowed down, but didn't stop and Max looked up. They were in his shitty street alright, his tiny two bedroom just at the end of the street.

"Just over there," he pointed and Vince hummed, picking up some speed.

As soon as Vince parked, Max pushed the door open and heaved in the gutter. He coughed and coughed, until more bright yellow bile splattered in the dry leaves, grabbing on the door handle with all his force to keep from falling out of the car.

"Jesus," Vince thumped his back softly, "get it up, man."

"Hurtss..." Max groaned, as his throat and stomach ached something fierce. He really wanted to be knocked out.

"Let's get you inside with some water, c'mon," Vince jumped from the car and circled it quickly, in order to help him out. Max slapped his hand away the second he felt steadier on his feet.

He wasn't a total invalid, this was just a flu. A terrible, biblical-plague levels, stomach flu, but just a flu.

The blonde stumbled for the door, pressing his forehead to the wood and breathing deeply as he tried to make his hands stop shaking in order to unlock it.

"Give me that," Vince snatched his keys with a scoff, "and stop making my life harder."

"G'away," Max mumbled, thumping his forehead to the door, "you can go now."

"Get in bed and drink some water and I'll go," Vince shoved him forward unceremoniously when Max made no movement to get inside upon the door unlocking, "go."

Max groaned at the shove and stumbled in, falling against the couch. He had no strength to make it to his bed, even if that wasn't far at all given the fact his apartment was as tiny as they came.

He rolled on his back and watched Monacelli look around, wrinkling his nose in a judgmental manner and causing Max to scowl, "you're an ass."

"And this place looks like a cave," Vince shrugged, ignoring the insult and shoving the living room curtains open, forcing in some sunlight. He walked around, his giant form feeling completely out of place in such a cramped space, "where do you keep your meds?"

"Get out of my house," Max groaned, but his eyes were heavy once more. He shuddered as a wave of revulsion hit him and rushed to roll on his side, but there really wasn't anything else in his belly, not even water to bring up.

Instead he dry heaved until his ears were ringing and the couch felt like it was swimming. A huge hand grabbed his chin, then his nape- Then a cold glass pressed to his mouth and he almost choked with relief, drinking it greedily- Only for the glass to be removed.

"You'll make yourself sick," Vince sighed, crouching next to the couch, "lets see if this stays down."

"Why are you herestill...?" Max mumbled, curling up and feeling Vince pull on his shoes.

"I'm asking myself that," Vince scoffed, then Max winced as he felt the other man drape a blanket over him, "get some sleep."

"You're so weird, man," Max sighed, letting sleep pull him down, "no self preservation."

#sickfic #mywriting #max daniels #stomach flu #emeto #emetophilia #stomach bug

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lostbetweenvampiresandmusic · 3 months

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requests are open right? You don’t have to do this LMA0

just David being comforted that mf needs a hug and a good cry methinks

This one has been stuck in my head - there are so many scenes and opportunities where this idea would fit and omg - thank you for requesting this because I didn't know that this was something I wanted to write/read! I hope you like this 💜

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For the first time in decades, the cave was quiet. No distant chatter, no music being played in the background. Even the crickets and bats kept quiet, almost as if they felt their silence was necessary.

The only one present in the cave was David. He had made a mess of things, or at least, that's how it felt. Where he had tried to turn Star, he had failed. He knew the girl was stubborn, but to ignore her own nature like that - the way she ignored her hunger, the need to feed and lure victims away so she could do so? David shook his head. He had underestimated the girl, that was for sure.

That seemed to happen a lot, lately. Underestimating outsiders. He didn't even know exactly how that had happened. Was it because he and his boys had gotten too relaxed, believing they owned the town? Was it because Star had been begging him to let Michael in? Was it because of Max' foolish plan? He sighed as he lit his - final, he realised - cigarette. Things had gotten wrong.

In the back of the cave, far away from the deadly sunlight, he kept the bodies of his fallen brothers. Every night, he fed them fresh blood, slowly but surely healing them. Marko was close to waking up again, but both Paul and Dwayne took more damage and would take longer to heal. The only reason he had even gotten out of that damned house and managed to bring his brothers along was because of an old friend of theirs.

Charlie had saved them - had saved him. Charlie had pulled him off those antlers, feeding him blood until he had healed himself. Charlie, who had a habit of running off and exploring, taking "make the most of your life" more literal than most. Charlie, who had run away after the five of them had been turned back in 1906, and only ever stopped by once every seven years before disappearing again, that Charlie - she had saved them.

"I've got some extra bodies if the boys need more blood."

David looked up, startled by the sudden interruption of the silence. He looked at her, nodded, and refocused in his cigarette.

"You can't continue down this path."

"What path?" His voice was colder than intended.

"This. This self-pity. Stop blaming yourself. You didn't do this to them."

"Sure feels like I did."

"You didn't ask for those wannabe vampire hunters to barge in here. You didn't ask for Marko to be staked. You didn't ask for them preparing for your revenge, and almost succeeding because of dumb fucking luck, did you?"

"No."

"Then why do you blame yourself?"

David was quiet for a moment, dropping what remained of his cigarette. "I'm their leader."

"On the boardwalk, maybe. In here, you're their equal."

"They followed me, because I wanted to get revenge."

"They wanted revenge too." Charlie had walked closer to him. She stood in front of him, sighing softly. "You don't have to do this alone anymore."

"I know you, Char. Within a couple of days, you'll be off to your next adventure, and I'll be here waiting to see if the boys will wake up."

"I won't leave until I know they are fine." She said, determination clear in her voice. "This, all of this, is not on you, your leadership or your actions."

David didn't respond. He just stared at the floor, trying his best to ignore her. Deep down, he knew she was right, but he didn't want her to be. Right now, he had someone to blame. Himself. He was never one for blaming himself, but this time, it felt right. All the others that were responsible were dead, anyways, and he couldn't blame them, now, could he?

"David."

David looked up, freezing when suddenly he felt her arms around him. She held him, not saying anything. She just held him, and before he realised it, he felt some tears running down his cheek. Charlie still didn't say anything. She just sighed softly, looking at him with a sad smile. She wiped away his tears.

"I won't leave you. Not until I know you are fine," she whispered finally, giving him a soft kiss on his temple.

#the lost boys #marko #david #paul #tlb #dwayne #the lost boys 1987 #tlb 1987 #the lost boys x reader #lost boys

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idkwhatimdoinghere1655 · 1 month

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Australian GP 2024!

Mads' Race Recap!

Oh my jesus lord christ alive this was a goddamn good day. OK, I'll try to remain calm, but that is VERY difficult under the circumstances of my 3 best boys getting the podiums. But, I shall do this in order of constructors. Also, thanks to @lipringlrh for edging me through the entire bloody race cause she knew what happened, I swore I was going to be sick.

Red Bull - Nice qualis from Max, and I can't say I wasn't happy with Checo's three place penalty, just because I definitely think it helped the main race. Everything was all honky dory, then Carlos overtook and I was just like 'OK Carlitos, sure'. Then Max was slowing down... Then Lando and Charles passed, and the everyone else. The brakes were smoking, I was screaming out of pure joy. Now, don't take this the wrong way, I love Max. BUT, this provided my boys some very good opportunities. I reckon if Checo hadn't gotten the penalty, he could've tried to pip in front, but I won't dwell on what didn't happen.

Ferrari - WE GOT A FUCKING FERRARI 1-2 BABYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! HOLY FUCKING SHIT WHEN I TELL YOU I LOST MY GODDAMN MIND IT IS UNPARALLELED! Anyway, I'll be constructive, for a moment, at least. Charles and Carlos had some mental quali pace, so how they didn't get pole is a little crazy to me. Alas, none of that matters now. The second I saw Max go, I was like 'oh fuck we've got it'. Carlos DOTD and race winner, barely 2 weeks after having his appendix out and he doesn't have a seat?! Absolutely diabolical. It was sweet how he went back to singing Smooth Operator, I was waiting for it. When I heard the commentators saying that they may swap the positions so that Charles could lead the WDC, I was shitting it. Yes, I wanted Charles to win, but I didn't want it to be because of something stupid like team orders. Charles can win without needing it handing to him, and it would've been so damn disrespectful to Carlos. Every year that a team has finished 1-2 in Melbourne, they've gone on to win both championships... It's our year, I'm telling you.

So happy to see them back at the top, both of them did incredibly, Charles was pulling pace out of God knows where for that fastest lap. And the strategy was good???? Like, bringing Charles in when he said he needed to? Listening??? Nice stuff. Hearing the Spanish and Italian anthems was absolutely amazing. Also, I feel like this really highlights how special Ferrari is. The team were screaming that Italian anthem like there was nothing more important to them, and they were all hugging and having a whale of a time. It was just so fucking nice to see Charlandos up there, so fucking good. So so so so so happy, Forza Ferrari. Everyone is a Ferrari fan.

McLaren - OK, so, quali wise, Lando kinda came out of nowhere. I feel like Oscar was just... There? We were racing, it was the 'rarri 1-2 with Oscar in P3 at his home race, it was lovely stuff. Then they swapped the positions. Can someone please tell me why they swapped the positions? Pretty sure it was something to do with either less pace or more recent pitting or something, but I'm not 100% sure. As much as I love Lando, I wanted him to stay down in P3 just for that Ferrari 1-2. I needed it. The last few laps, I was looking at the delta between Charles and Lando, and I was relieved to see that it wasn't changing. Super happy for Lando, Oscar did loads better at his home race, nice one for all.

Mercedes - What the hell is going on here? Like, Lewis' qualis weren't good, George's were fine, nothing bad but nothing spectacular. Now the race was something else. I can't really blame Lewis for his problem, since it was a mechanical issue obviously as opposed to driver error. From what I saw of George, he didn't even do anything that bad. One minute he was fine, the next he was turned on his side. I may not want Merc to get points, but I don't want a crash to be the reason why. He's OK, so that's all that really matters. But, as for the car in general, there's something wrong with it. It's not just a one week thing where it's a bit off, this has been consistent. Yes, George had a nice P3 in qualis the other week, but the pace just wasn't there at all in the race. I just don't know what's going on with them at the minute, and the fact that they're so behind the Ferraris and McLarens is concerning.

Aston Martin - Pretty mediocre all together, I've seen varied opinions on Fernando's 20 second pen. Some said he was kinda to blame for George's crash, from what I saw, he was just avoiding George after the fact. I don't really know, so I won't comment until I watch another replay. But yeah, nothing too special, but they do need to up their game.

VCARB/RB/REDBULLSHITTYEDITION - Yuki Tsunoda. Well bloody done babe. Got extra points thanks to the Fernando penalty, even if I didn't really see him during the race like... at all. But, he must've done a pretty damn good job to end up all the way in eighth before the end of the race. Now, Daniel. What is this man doing? 12th is not bad, but when your teammate with less experience in the same car is doing that much better than you in your home race, you know something's up. I love Danny Ric, but Carlos is more likely to get that Red Bull seat than he is at this rate. Slightly disappointed, I won't lie.

Haas - Both drivers getting points? OK, OK. I actually think Kevin could've gotten higher in qualis if Checo hadn't impeded, but I'm glad Checo was put down on the grid. Overall though, nice drive from both, nice to see them get points.

Williams - Right, realistically, what harm would it have done to let Logan drive? It wasn't his fault, Alex has fucked it at that circuit so many times at the same place, and Alex didn't even get points. It wasn't fair, and he took it like an absolute champ. #justiceforlogiebear #cancelwilliams

Kick Sauber - These guys need to fix their pitstops I swear to God. How many times are they going to get that wheel nut stuck on? They did 1 good one for Valtteri, but they screwed up all the others. Zhou's pitlane start was unfortunate after it looked like his front wing just... fell off. Someone said the car reminds them of a wheelie bin, I completely agree and can't see it any differently.

Alpine - Pierre 's fault for getting the 5 second penalty, but other than that, they were shit as usual. Pierre was running pretty high for a little while, then just kind of... fell back. I can't help but laugh at them, I know it's mean, I just find it so bloody comical. I think FC Versailles is just a distraction, but he has just invested in a Tier 3 league, unheard of French football team... Nice one, I guess.

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notf1obsessed · 2 days

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A Little Flirting Hurt No One (Charlos): you can find the full fic on here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55395409

Chapter 10: Monaco

Charles's fingers curl around the steering wheel, tightening his grip on it. His body is boiling under the immense heat of the car. He can see the red bull in front of him, the last car he needs to overtake to lead.

It's the last lap of the Monaco Grand Prix.

It's his chance to lead the championship.

The weekend had gone pretty trash for them, placing P5 in qualifying with Carlos behind him in P6.

His foot presses harder on the throttle, this corner is his only hope at overtaking Max. His entire body radiates as he steers towards the inside of the apex, but the red bull flicks towards him. He's going too fast to be able to slow down, he has to steer clear. He jogs his steering wheel to the left, attempting to match the level of the Red Bull. He succeeds in doing so as he steers towards the inside, trying to overtake again. The Red Bull next to him steers to the left, making contact with his tires. Its dark blue livery speeds further down the straight.

He hears something pop.

No, no, no.

He was doing so well.

He can feel the punctured tire beneath him.

"Bring the car in Leclerc," says the man into his radio, hints of disappointment leaking through.

He does as told, steering his car into the pit stop. Which just to his luck, was a bit far.

By the time he got out, 5 cars had already gotten through.

Shitty pit stop, it's too late to be able to overtake them all now.

The chequered flag waves in front, Max had won yet another Grand Prix.

He ended up coming 7th, Carlos coming fourth.

Fuck.

He goes to park his car in the parc ferme. His hands keep a firm grip on the steering wheel, his way to disperse his anger.

He swallows the lump in his throat, finally relaxing his grip on the wheel. He gets out before taking off his helmet, going to his driver's room. Not bothering to talk to anyone. He felt the anger radiating throughout his entire body, muscles still tense.

Everybody knew not to disturb Charles in this mood.

Except Carlos, apparently.

He closes the door behind him with a slam, going over to sit at the massage table. He could still hear the muffled voices of talking outside, not really able to focus on anything. His disappointment too overshadowing.

His head is tilted upwards, sweat trickling down his face. He runs a couple of fingers through his hair, trying to alleviate his stress.

He hears a knock in the door.

Brought back to the present, he raises a brow at who could be knocking, now.

"Come in," he says, a tone of curiosity lingering.

The door creaked open slowly, a couple of hairs peaking through. Face coming in slowly, the Spaniard's face bore an expression of concern.

Of course it was Carlos.

He slowly entered, taking cautious steps as to not startle Charles, as if he's a cat about to run away.

The door behind him slowly closes as he leans against it.

"Are you okay?" He said, breaking Charles from his train of thoughts. It was quite a useless question, really, as he knew Charles was far from fine.

"Hm, yeah totally fine," Charles replied, sarcasm, a ton of it, leaking through, as well as hints of anger. He saw Carlos's expression change to a sadder one. He wondered if he was too harsh on his teammate. He sighed before looking down at the floor, he didn't want to talk to anyone right now. He'd rather focus on dealing with his anger by himself.

Carlos's gaze softened, removing his hands from the door. He walked over to sit next to Charles at the massage table, Charles making room for him. His lips parted to speak.

"Charles," he began, gaze shifting towards Charles's eyes, "you have to understand, that whatever happened out there, wasn't your fault mate."

Charles opened his mouth to interrupt, but Carlos continued before he could do so.

"Look Charles, you can't keep putting the blame on yourself for everything that goes wrong. You are an amazing driver, you shouldn't let other people's mistakes interfere with how much you think of yourself. But if you keep doing so, you will start to perform badly."

Charles let his words sink in for a moment. He was right, it wasn't Charles's fault, but he couldn't come to accept that. Because in his eyes, if he isn't perfect, he's useless. If he makes a mistake, he's the worst driver to ever live. He has to perform every move with immense accuracy, or else it's worth nothing. He has to know every solution to every problem, or else he's a complete idiot who knows nothing. He has to be the best. Always.

They stay quiet for a moment, the tranquility accompanying their thoughts.

He could feel Carlos's gaze piercing through him, as if his thoughts were exposed to him.

He felt a hand slowly wrap around his waist, pulling him closer. His fingers wrapped gently around Charles's hip, thumb slowly grazing over the fabric.

Charles flopped his head to the side, cheek caressing Carlos's shoulder.

He felt his tense muscles relax. His once tightened fists slowly opening.

They didn't say anything, staying silent.

It was a comfortable silence.

He felt his eyes slowly shut, the tiredness of the Grand Prix sinking in.

Before drifting off, he heard one last faint voice, "Never let other people's mistakes affect you Charles, never."

#carlos sainz #charles leclerc #f1 #charlos #1655 #f1 fanfic #ao3 #formula 1

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f0point5 · 8 months

Note

I can't help myself but those chats between Metaphor and y/n are so comical. 😅

He's trying so hard to get something... anything. It's always him starting a convo, him asking questions, him with the x's, him with everything. And when he gets those short answers (I can't help but like her even more for that) he always takes a couple steps back and explains himself for the message and the words, like he's going up against a scared dog. 😄

And she's not changing her approach at all. 🤣 I really wonder how those dates look like, what they even talk about... and then I think maybe that's exactly why she couldn't tell all too much to her bff, because there wasn't much to tell. 🤣

Him bringing up Max and saying he knows they're close made it seem like he's already intimidated by him. All those comments and stories about Max and y/n that are out there on social media, open for everyone to read... Metaphor might have taken a closer look.

And with the story you included about how Max always puts her first even when he had a girlfriend, and her doing the same, it'll really be interesting to see not only how long y/n will keep this dating thing up, but also how Metaphor will deal with having to share her. 🤣

Sounds like any relationship of either Max or y/n has always resolved itself in the past for a reason...

I really hope both of them will realize what they have and how they feel for each other before anything. But for the moment Max playing it cool doesn't seem that bad of an approach. 😆

I will say this, I do see both of them as dry texters. He definitely tries harder but I also don’t feel like he adds enough for it to inspire a response if you know what I mean?

Man’s trying so hard to say the right thing when the right thing would be to say less, honestly. He is not used to dating someone in the public eye and it SHOWS. But also, she is clearly giving him signs that she’s a private person and he keeps trying to bring up stuff about her life that he has learnt from sources that aren’t her, which is just so cringe. For sure when they’re on a date and she has more opportunity to steer the conversation, and he can see as he’s talking if she’s not engaging with something, it’s a lot smoother and they can keep to neutral topics.

We know how algorithms work, he’s for sure getting things coming up on his fyp. And tbf to him thats the only information he’s getting because she’s not talking about it at all, so you couldn’t blame him. I’m sure it’s intimidating to take a girl out knowing there’s thousands of people on the internet talking about her relationship with another man.

There’s reasons unrelated to Max why she can’t keep a boyfriend, and those will get explored.

Nah, that last comment. Men are not allowed to play it cool. If they want something they have to go get it, thems the rules. But it’s fine because Max categorically he said he doesn’t want to get it so….

Also, I did see your ask about tagging, I’m just keeping it in the inbox so I can remember for the next part :)

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marringrove · 4 months

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Quick summary: Steve and Billy has a little falling out... Max gathers the gang with a trick up her sleeve.

"dipshit," Billy curses under his breath, tossing away the cigarette he was smoking. He walks to where the source of his ire is sitting, trying to hold back his anger as he makes his way inside scoops ahoy. "hey, dipshit. You bailed on me last night," he said in a small voice... almost disappointed, even.

Steve looks up at him, sitting on a secluded booth on his break from scooping ice creams the whole morning for spoiled brats coming to the mall for sugar rush. Steve gives Billy a small smile, wry. "I'm sorry,"

"that's all?" Billy stuffs his hands on the back pocket of his lifeguard shorts, clicking his tongue at the brunette. "I walked all the way here from the fucking pool on my lunch break, and all I get is a pathetic I'm sorry? You were the one who wanted to fuck," he adds, and despite his anger... Billy knows better than to raise his voice in such a public setting... On such a mature subject!

"Billy, I'm... I'm sorry, okay? I was... Look, I was fucking drunk when I asked you that a couple days ago... I, I don't even know if I'm into guys like that—"

Billy rightfully scoffs, sliding into the booth seat opposite Steve's. "Don't give me that shit. I would've believed you if you didn't have your hands all over me at your friend Robin's queer little mixer,"

Steve puts a hand on his face, a bit flustered at the memory. "I... Billy, listen, I..."

Billy shakes his head with a scoff, getting himself out of the seat. "Forget it. Fuck you, Harrington. You give me the heebie jeebies anyway. Plenty of other guys for me to fuck,"

Steve watches Billy go, the disappointment in the blond's eyes overpowered the glower his whole face was making. And Steve realizes that, but he couldn't find the courage to chase after him.

"what do you think of Billy?" Steve asks Robin, a quiet evening stocking pints being their main task before the end of their shift.

Robin doesn't answer at first, still putting away empty pints of ice cream. She gives Steve a look. "Handsy Steve wants to know what I think of Billy?"

Steve furrows his eyebrows in disagreement over the nickname. "What's that nickname supposed to mean?"

Robin shakes her head. "Well..." She gets into storyteller mode. "imagine, a week ago. I hosted a little mixer for our friends, trying to find a little fun in-between having a job. And it's so fun! Until one of your dingus baby friends Max, brings over her big brother to our party!"

Steve looks at her with a shrug. "So?"

"so?" Robin scoffs. "so, that brother turns out to be Billy, who just so happens to be the cutest guy you've ever seen, right?"

"I didn't say that," Steve protests.

"you didn't say anything," Robin stacks the empty pints inside a container as she speaks. "You immediately approached the guy, whisks him off to a corner in my apartment, and worked your little king Steve magic on him — and it must've worked! Because not even moments later, Billy started giggling and laughing at your stupid jokes, and you couldn't keep your hands off him! So tell me, handsy Steve, what do I think of Billy?"

Steve only blinks. "That... Was not how I remembered it happening,"

"that absolutely happened, dingus," Robin sighs. "You can't blame the alcohol for everything,"

"but I'm not into guys... I think..." Steve shakes his head in disbelief, but the flush on his cheeks betray his composure.

Robin shakes her head, looking at her friend with a halfhearted exasperation. "you owe the curly mullet an apology, dingus."

"maybe I do," Steve puts a hand on his hips, gaze distant.

"and this time, try not to be handsy Steve before you actually apologize, okay?"

—

Christmas eve of 1986... The hustle and bustle of hawkins is enough to drive any sane person out of town, so you'd know that only the locals remain for the holidays.

Steve has been on the outs with Billy for a couple months. This little song and dance they've been doing has been nothing short of exhausting for everyone around them, and Max has had it.

The gang (Max, Lucas, Dustin, Robin... Even Joyce and Hopper are in it now) are sitting scattered across the Wheeler's poorly insulated basement, with only one intention.

Max puts down a heavy book on the DND table, landing with a thud.

"we need to get Steve and Billy together." Max utters, without beating around the bush.

"what the fuck is that?" Lucas asks, gesturing at the heavy looking tome.

"this," Max said, resolute as she opens the book. "Is Billy's diary."

"what?" Joyce's eyes widen. "You can't, you can't take your brother's diary and read it—"

Max shrugs. "Look, mrs. Byers, I'm grateful that you've been taking Billy in since neil is a piece of shit—but Billy is unbearable whenever he comes to visit. Don't you find him unbearable when he's at home? Always moping? Hair flat?"

Joyce doesn't know how to react to that. "Well, I... No, that's... Yeah... I suppose he is a bit... Melancholic lately,"

Max nods to herself. "That's what I thought. Steve is avoiding Billy like he's scared, right? But I know there's so much more than that. So Robin, you know him best. What's he actually feeling?"

Robin gingerly takes center stage. "Well, dingus is... He clearly likes Billy, that much is obvious... What I don't get is why he doesn't just go for it, y'know?"

Max nods. "Exactly. So we need a plan,"

Dustin raises his hand. "Sorry, but... What kind of plan are you talking about...?"

"it's gonna take a whole team effort... But if we pull this off, those two will finally stop being unbearable about their unrequited feelings, freeing us all from having to watch it. Who's with me?"

—

That same night, nearly midnight.

Billy is closing up his shift at melvald's, putting away cardboard cutout signs into the storage room. He hears a shuffle coming from the front of the shop, thinks nothing of it.

"we're closed!" Billy shouts to the direction of the sound, still locking up the storage with a cigarette in his lips, helping him cope.

"Billy?" The voice calls out, a familiar one to Billy's ears.

The blond's blood boils. He makes his way to the shop floor, and there he is. Steve Harrington, hair perfect as always, donning his obnoxious signature lopsided grin, though this time he looks more worried than glad to see Billy.

"the fuck are you doing here? We're closed," Billy shakes his head, immediately pushing the king out of the shop floor, trying to eject him from the premises.

"I... Robin called, said you were in trouble, told me you got into a fight because of me..." Steve plants his feet, turning around to explain the situation.

Billy's eyebrows crease. "I look like I got into a fight lately? Your friend pranked you, dipshit. Now get out—"

Bzzzzt!

...and that buzzing sound would be the shop's front door's new security system, automatically locking in case of a blackout.

"what was that?" Steve asks, looking around. He tries to open the door, but it won't budge.

"don't bother," Billy sighs, taking his cigarette out of his lips, running his hair through his fingers without much hope. "The big boss installed those new fancy doors couple days back. In case of a blackout, the door automatically locks,"

"so..." Steve tries to piece it together, albeit struggling, it's way past his bedtime after all.

"so, princess," Billy shakes his head with a sigh. "We're stuck here until the lights come back on,"

"isn't there a generator in the back or something?" Steve gestures to the backroom.

Billy laughs. "the fuck is this? Pentagon? It's all in the back of the shop, breaker box in the alleyway... Some kids probably think it's funny to play a prank,"

Steve doesn't really know what to do in this situation. "Maybe I can break the glass—"

"...and the money to replace that is gonna be cut out of my paycheck, pretty boy." Billy smirks, irked.

Steve slinks down on the secluded corner of the snack isle, back against the wall. "I had a plan, y'know... I was, was gonna leave town tonight,"

Billy rolls his eyes... But he joins Steve, sitting next to him on the cardboard covered floors. "Yeah? Can't stand hawkins?"

Steve shakes his head. "It's not that, I... It's this year-end workshop thing on the next town over..."

"what's it about?" Billy asks, just for the sake of defeating the already deafening silence that gets louder every minute the lights are out.

"self defense, believe it or not. Y'know, since... We're probably gonna be facing a bunch more of those upside down things,"

Billy sarcastically scoffs. "Maybe you should start at planting your fucking feet," he puffs out smoke, giving Steve a look.

Steve laughs wryly, taking the cigarette out of Billy's hand, smokes it himself. "Yeah, I... Look, Billy... I'm sorry about the past couple months, avoiding you..."

Billy abruptly stands up, dusting himself off. "Forget about it," he's about to leave, but feels a hand on his wrist.

Steve stops Billy by pulling him by the wrist, spinning Billy quite brusquely, pulling the blond's body flush against his, and time seems to stand still.

"hear me out," Steve mutters, gazing into Billy's eyes, pleading.

Billy's breathing hitches in his throat at the sudden gesture, and he gives Steve a challenging look to disguise his fluster. "What do you even have to say for yourself, dipshit?"

Steve draws a long breath, closing his eyes. Snow starts to fall again, seen from the outside of the shop window. "Billy, I was scared. Not because of the whole, being queer in a small town kind of way, but in a way that's... When I look in your eyes, I don't see myself,"

Billy raises an eyebrow. Steve hasn't let his hips go. "And the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"it... I don't see myself, the way... The way I want everyone to see me, when I look in your eyes. And that scares me. Because I really, really like you, Billy,"

"you're talking to the guy who almost died twice, princess. Stop speaking in codes, because I don't have time for this shit," Billy tries to free himself from the hold, but Steve wouldn't budge.

"what I mean is... I'm sorry, Billy. I really am, for bailing on you, for letting you down, for... For not fighting for you,"

Billy doesn't know what to say. He looks down on the floor instead. "That's... That's great, pretty boy..."

"give me a second chance, Billy. I won't be so scared anymore,"

Bzzzzt!

The lights turn back on all of a sudden, and Billy wrestles free from Steve's hold, putting as much distance as possible from the brunette.

Steve sighs at the unfortunate timing, hands on his hips as he tries to gather the words. "Look... tomorrow, Robin invited me to her get together, just friends and family. I... I want you to be there, Billy,"

The blond stops packing things for a moment to look Steve in the eye. "And what if I'm not gonna come?"

Steve doesn't answer, giving Billy the biggest, most pleading set of eyes he's ever seen.

Then Steve leaves the shop, to a flummoxed Billy.

—

Christmas day, evening

Robin's little get together in her apartment is merry and bright, as her friends arrive with nothing but good tidings and presents, immediately helping themselves to her homemade eggnog in the kitchen.

Steve paces around the living room, a bit restless.

"what's wrong?" Robin asks, siddling up to him.

"I invited Billy last night, just... wondering if he's gonna show,"

"huh, and here I thought you were gonna go to that workshop," Robin mutters.

"that can wait," Steve shakes his head.

"looking for me, pretty boy?" A voice rings out, breaking Steve from his pondering.

Steve turns around, and Billy is here, right behind him, hands stuffed in his jeans, staving of the cold with a red scarf, some of its fringes stuck on the ends of his mullet.

"Billy..." Steve said softly, relieved of his presence. "You came,"

Billy is taken aback at the ingenuity in the king's voice, but plays it off with a scoff. "Yeah, yeah... wipe that drool off your face, pretty boy. I'm only here for Robin's eggnog,"

Steve grins... Billy purses his lips, trying his best not to smile back.

—

Robin approaches Max and Joyce, a small but conspiratorial smile on her face. "I think the plan worked,"

"we can't know that for sure," Joyce mutters, arms crossed. "I almost got caught fiddling with the shop's breaker box last night," she lowers her voice a considerable amount at the last sentence.

"then let's hope it works," Max said quietly, stealing glances of her brother on the other corner of the apartment, talking to Steve.

—

"you know, pretty boy..." Billy said quietly, almost like a whisper. "All of this intricate plan just to win me back?"

Steve furrows his eyebrows. "What do you mean?" He asks, putting on his usual obnoxiously charming half smile.

Billy rolls his eyes with a long, drawn out sigh. "Steve. I know you put Joyce up to this. Messing with melvald's light box last night? Trapping us both in the store so you could become handsy Steve? I actually didn't think you had it in you to be so callous,"

Steve is more confused than ever. "But I didn't! Robin called me and said—" he turns to Robin's direction, huddled together with Max and Joyce in the opposite corner of the apartment... And it all clicked on him. "...oh,"

"oh what?"

"those three," Steve gestures at the three women surreptitiously looking at them, sighing. "It was their plan,"

Billy nods. "Sounds more like it,"

"seems I owe them a thank you," Steve sighs.

"what for? I haven't said I would give you a second chance," Billy sits down on the couch, face unreadable.

Steve sits next to him, giving him a look. "Not even if I promise you I'll be handsy Steve on demand?"

Billy raises an eyebrow. "... I want a free scoop every time I visit you in scoops ahoy,"

"deal," Steve nods. "Anything else?"

"tell your friends to stop being fucking nosy," Billy nods to himself, putting his cigarette out on the ashtray.

"I don't think I can do that," Steve let out a small laugh, siddling closer to Billy, the gesture not unnoticed. "But I can tell them that you and I are a thing... So they'd probably be less nosy. Or not,"

Billy shakes his head, hiding his amusement behind a sarcastic, cheeky grin. "Well, suppose we'll have to try being an item and see what they'll do, huh?"

"I'd like that very much. Merry Christmas, Billy." Steve squeezes Billy's hand on the couch, soft but firm.

"...merry Christmas, Steve."

#harringrove #just a small harringrove fic i cranked out of my brain last night... merry christmas and happy hanukkah to all

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pancake-breakfast · 9 months

Text

Totally cheating and writing this post early. IT'S THE ONLY WAY.

Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 6, Chapters 5-6 below.

Chapter 5: Colorless Expression

Vash's careless pose with a cheerful smile is a very harsh contrast to the revelation at the end of the last chapter.

I wonder who got that photo of July going up. Also, shout out to the tiny, tiny headshot of Vash in the newspaper.

Never underestimate the cruelty potential of little old ladies. Especially if they think they have nothing to lose.

Is Vash going to church??

LOL, not if this kid has anything to say about it.

I dunno. I think Meryl might be onto something. Or maybe just noticing it for the first time. Maybe some of both.

Vash looks like he's praying. Or falling asleep.

Aaand there's tired Vash looking like Knives. Ugh, someone take care of him.

Very rude of them to bring guns into the house of God AND to then suggest murdering someone with them right then and there.

I read this guy's name wrong so from now on he's Justin Baby.

Never trust a Haliburton. They're always up to something.

Meanwhile, Wolfwood is in noodle bliss. I'm sure that's gonna last and he's gonna get to enjoy the whole bowl undisturbed.

Yep, he got a whole three panels before a cacophony of news about Vash's latest shenanigans interrupted his meal. You can see his peace and quiet melt out of his being.

Vash was already feeling pretty freaking depressed over all he's done. That's why he went to the church in the first place. This is not helping.

Wait, has Vash been drinking?? Buddy, don't you know alcohol's a downer? It's not gonna help with the depression. Even Wolfwood thinks this is a bad idea. Looks like he still has the moves, though.

Ohhhh, babygirl doesn't look so good.

Wolfwood and the girls know what's up, and Wolfwood in particular looks less than thrilled about it. First his soup, then sloppy mess Vash, and now his boss.

Vash, babygirl, what's going on in that spiky head of yours right now??

Wolfwood has clearly had enough of this morning's shit.

There's so much going on on this page, with characters overlapping without any panel breaks even though they're clearly not realistically positioned around Wolfwood. It's like our priest man is drowning in them. And then there's Vash, alone in the lower left corner, the last place you're likely to look when reading manga, and the only one set out from everyone else. ;_;

"Needle-noggin-isms." Heh.

Dude, this guy has Mad Max speakers.

Drunk or not, Vash still has mad skills.

He burned some of his power to catch that bullet. That's... he's really not in a good mental place, is he.

Meryl just goes into a full-on panic at the sight of it. Can't say I blame her, all things considered. No one was as up close and personal with that last encounter in the Dragon's Nest as she was.

Uggggghhhhh, Vash knows he's messed up.

Guys, I shoulda stopped three chapters ago. This chapter's depressing AF.

God bless Wolfwood. He's doing his best to protect Vash while abiding by them Needle-noggin-isms.

Milly's just straight up carrying Meryl, isn't she?

Vash, noooooo, this huuuuurts.

He's got too much he's trying to carry, and now he's just lost. Thank God for once he's not alone. He's got people around him right now, and that... that might be enough. Even one person having his back might be enough.

WHICH IS ALL HE'S GETTING APPARENTLY BECAUSE VASH CAN'T BEAR TO WORRY MERYL ANYMORE AND MERYL'S IN NO SHAPE TO DO ANYTHING.

Heh, the kid is trying his best to fight the adults. Good for him.

And Wolfwood, trying his best to lighten the mood. Awkwardly.

Chapter 6: Seeds Voyaging to the Stars, A World Inside A Pod

How DARE you show me their smiling faces after that. How dare. I'm in no mood. D:<

Oh, good. It's Knives. I think.

Ok, I love how in every one of these panels, the dark streak in Knives' hair is somehow hidden. It gets called out once on its own, but when we're looking at Knives' face, it's not there. It just kind of deepens how incredibly important it is.

The games are over. Now Knives has to find a different way to save his brother... and himself. Or risk them both dying in the process.

I wonder what Legato will think of his boss's new look....

I thought Elandira was down with Knives' plan because she had no issues with it for some reason, but now I think she's just here for the chaos and not really much more invested in who wins than Zazie is.

Ooof, Vash catching sight of his reflection. That face looking back at him is always his brother's.

Yeah, Wolfwood's run out of patience for this shit. He might punch Knives in the face if he had the chance right now. This... this is how he shows he cares about Vash's well-being.

Ooohhhh, is Vash getting echoes of what happened there?

Seeing his sister's corpse isn't sitting well for Vash, either.

Hells, even before the fall, we have Vash just floating around by himself. He has a whole-ass happy, non-genocidal brother and a caring surrogate mom, and our introduction to him here is him by himself, touched by nothing, backdropped by the void of space.

Hahahahaha, the boys look so confused.

Interesting that Rem is wearing a silly mask at this awkward birthday party when we were JUST TALKING ABOUT how Vash plasters a fake expression on to try and paint things a brighter color. I'm sure it has no significance whatsoever, especially with Rem awkwardly dodging Vash's question about what's the matter by saying how incredible a year it's been.

OMG BABY KNIVES!!! You can't look at this and tell me Knives didn't adore Rem at least as much as Vash did.

She adores them, too, despite how much she must feel like she's grasping at straws trying to figure out how to take care of them.

I love that every version of Trigun thus far has had a birthday scene for the boys with Rem.

Fishing them out of the plant bulb must have been a task.

Hahahaha, definitely a shortcut. In so many ways.

The boys aren't fooled. I know the boys are hyper-intelligent and all, but even normal kids often pick up on micro-emotions like this.

Ugggghhhhh, they both loved all the people on the ships. THEY BOTH LOVED ALL THE PEOPLE ON THE SHIPS!!!

Their conversation.... They both want to be friends with the humans, even if it takes effort.

Knives, maybe you should lay off some of the war movies.

I like to think they created Plants the way the Quarians created sentient AI in Mass Effect. They were just trying to do something that didn't include making a conscious intelligence, and then something went weird that no one understands, and now Plants.

Blaring space ship alarms are not a preferred wake-up method. Especially when you're on the spaceship.

Is Rem trying to hide the twins from the crew??

Cliffhanger ending?! Booooooo....

Author Bonus Chapter

Uhhhh, ok, I'm just gonna note the kana here...

...isn't exactly a sound effect like all the rest of the kana on this page. This is literally the word for "pants" (ズボン, zubon) repeated several times.

Why they're all shouting "pants" at a pro-wrestling event is beyond me. Maybe 'cause the guys often don't wear pants.

Tiny, tiny Nightow in the audience. You know, I would have never guessed he was into pro wrestling given the IMMENSE AMOUNT OF DRAMATIC POSTURING AND WRESTLING OUTFITS his characters wear all the freaking time.

Gods, I recognize some of those signs. I didn't even like pro wrestling....

"Check my monkey ass directly into smackdown hotel!" LOL

"Ah, this reeks of effort!" Classic Nightow.

LOL, I could see him trying to buy all the figurines for himself. Gotta admit, if someone made a figurine of the main character of something I published, I'd buy it, too.

I will never get over Nightow asking McFarlane to do an "American Check" on the gun. The legacy of my country, folks.

"Please detail this area as it pleases you." Good to know Nightow is paying attention to those small details when he draws. /s

Actually, he did bother to emphasize the need for the ear piercing and the mole, which is good.

Somehow, I don't think he regrets the chain too much.

Hahahahaha, he imagines the place like some sort of evil lair.

Ohhhhh, nooooo. New Jersey?? Gods, this must have been a thing for someone who wasn't very familiar with U.S. geography. This was in 2000, too, apparently, which means (for all you young 'uns) that the internet was notoriously unreliable for looking up stuff like this. This was back in the day when a lot of teachers banned the use of internet sources because it was just assumed they'd be wrong. Assuming your teacher wasn't afraid of the internet entirely because they heard people could find naughty images on it.

They make figurines via DARK RITUALS.

Good to know I'm not inexcusable. I may not have many figurines, but manufacturing processes have always intrigued me.

LOL, "san kyu." San kyu for writing it, Nightow. You bastard. I'm going to cry myself to sleep over fictional characters tonight because of you.

This song started playing around the time I finished up this volume, and it seemed fitting, so I'm gonna put it here.

youtube

Archive

Trigun Volume 1: Covers + 1-3, 3 Detailed Thoughts, 4, 4 DT, 5-6, 5-6 + DT, 6 DT, 7-8, 9-10 || Volume 2: Covers + Extras, 1, 1 Supplemental Research, 2-4, 5-6, 7-8

TriMax Volume 1: Covers + 1-2, 2 DT, 3-4, 3 DT, 5-6 || Volume 2: Covers + 1, 2-4, 5, 6-7 || Volume 3: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-7 || Volume 4: Covers + 1-2, 3-5, 6-7 || Volume 5: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 3 DT, 5-6 || Volume 6: Covers + 1-2, 2 DT, 3-4

#trigunbookclub #trigun maximum #volume 6 #pancake thoughts #Youtube

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queenofthearchipelago · 1 year

Text

Oh shit

I think I figured out why Mike lied in the monologue!!! I forgot to think of all of this from Mike's perspective, and Mike's perspective goes like this (super long post ahead, sorry but I think it's necessary!):

October, 1985:

I, Mike Wheeler, figured out that I don't really like El romantically. It's Fall now, and Starcourt Mall is a couple months behind us and the Byers are moving to California. Me and El have been friends this whole time, and it's been good. She's been grieving Hopper, but our relationship has been good. But we were helping pack up, and she comes in to tell me that Max told her what I said in the cabin that day months ago. El said that I talked about my feelings, my heart.

I remembered what I said, that I loved her. But I didn't mean it the way Max and everyone else heard it. And now Max told El I meant it romantically, but I didn't. So I tried to deny it, like I didn't remember it at all. But she didn't seem to mind, or care to think about why I would deny it. She didn't even seem to believe me when I said I didn't remember either though because she walked right up to me and told me she loved me too before she kissed me and walked away.

I wasn't even trying to be in a romantic relationship with her anymore and now I guess I am, again? How did this happen? What do I do? How do I...?

March, 1986:

So I'm going to California to visit El and Will for spring break. I remember telling El back in October that maybe I could visit for Thanksgiving or Christmas, but I said that before she kissed me and walked away. So it never happened. How do I feel what I feel and then fly to California to spend a holiday with my girlfriend who I don't love romantically?

But I do miss her. Like, really. And I definitely miss Will. I keep trying to call their house, but the phone is always busy because Joyce has that job. I just can't bring myself to write him a letter, I don't know why. I've been writing them to El. It just seems so personal, it's not a back and forth like a normal conversation. It's an essay of all the things in your mind. And what's on my mind is, not exactly something I'm ready to say out loud not to mention write down. And then after you send the letter, the other person gets this piece of paper that has your handwriting on it, it's something you held and cared for and curated for the person you're sending it to.

I don't know, I guess I don't know how to write Will a letter about how much I've missed him. How do I write down that Hawkins isn't the same without him? That nothing feels normal anymore? That high school sucks but it would be better if he was here? How do I write that down and feel good about sending it?

I haven't ever felt good about it, so I never wrote him anything either. So essentially, we haven't talked in months. But he never called me or wrote to me either, so maybe he doesn't want to talk. Maybe he's caught up in his new life in Lenora and there's no space for me in it anymore?

But anyway, I'm going to California now. And I am excited to go, I am.

I am.

The next day:

So I'm in Lenora. Not even 5 seconds after being there I get a welcome kiss from El. I expected it, so it's fine I suppose. I gave her flowers, because that's also expected. But also I did miss her, and I wanted to get her a gift. I wrote From, Mike on the card. Because I could write that down and feel okay about it. It is true, it's from me. And there's no way she can read that and think something I didn't mean to say.

I played the part of good boyfriend as best as I could the rest of the day. I really just wanted to hang out cause like I said, I did miss her. And Will, but he's been rolling his eyes and not been in a good mood all day.

Turns out that was because he blamed me for us not talking these past months. But why am I the bad guy? He could have called or written too.

I guess I was busy in Hawkins struggling with what to say to him while he was in Lenora hoping that I cared enough to reach out. I did care, I do care... I'll have to apologize for that later.

The day after that:

I went to talk to El today about why she lied to me and what happened last night. I didn't want to blame her, I just wanted to understand. I was bullied in school too, I could have empathized if nothing else. But the conversation got away from me. Suddenly we're talking about how I think she's a monster?

When did I say that? What did I say that she thinks that?

Apparently it was because I signed my letters From Mike. If I had signed them Love Mike, then that would have been proof I didn't think she was a monster. Letters from Beloved Mike are good and letters just From Mike... aren't.

She told me that I never said that I loved her. And I said that I did say it... which, isn't true. And I knew that. I don't say it. But that's only because she'd hear it differently than I mean it. What I meant to say was, I would mean it. I would mean it if I said it. I do love her. Just, not like that.

I was hoping she'd see through me, but she didn't. It felt like a fight I can't come back from. I tried so hard to keep her in my life, I want her in my life. But she seems to only want me around as a boyfriend. I was scared that if I told her how I really feel then I'd really lose her. And not just to California, but forever.

I guess I lost her anyway. Because I was just Mike. Not what she wanted.

The day after that:

So El got arrested and then I guess after that she got kidnapped by the government but she went willingly??? She left me this note that she was going to become a superhero again, From El.

It's weird to say it but there's kindof a relief to it. Don't get me wrong, I'm super worried I've completely lost her, but at least just this once she doesn't think I love her like that. So in a way, this is the most honest we've been in months.

Will was rambling about the government and El or something. He seemed to notice something was on my mind, he always does. I wanted to tell him all this stuff. That I don't love her like that. But she wanted me to say the words and I don't know how to say them the way I mean it. And I don't want to lose her completely over it, but I lost her anyway and now what do I do?

But how do I tell him that without him thinking I'm talking about something I'm also not talking about? And I don't know if I want him to know that I felt that way this whole time either. He and El are clearly a lot closer than they were last summer. He didn't hesitate to call himself her brother. And I've been dating El letting her and everyone else think I loved her that way. Maybe he won't get it, maybe I don't want him to get it.

Because why wouldn't I love her like that? She's great! She's awesome! She's a superhero! But I guess that was also part of El's problem?

And this is the spiral in which I find myself going ever downward.

So I don't tell Will exactly what's going on. Just that we had a fight because I couldn't say something and it feels like the end. He was nice about it, he said I'll see her again and I can say whatever I want to say then. Which is... true. It made me feel better. I still have time to figure out how to say what I mean. So that she gets it. It'll be okay.

I realized later that I never apologized to Will. So I went to his room and I told him part of what I couldn't find the courage to write down. That Hawkins wasn't the same without him. That I missed him a lot and that I was clearly so worried about El, about losing her, that I lost him instead.

I asked him if I made sense. Please tell me he gets this the way I mean it? He nods and I kept going. I told him that I didn't know what was going to happen but that I thought we should work together as a team. As friends. Best friends.

Please tell me you get what I mean? Please hear that I don't wanna lose you. You're what makes my life normal and everything is weird without you and please don't leave me. I won't leave you behind again, I'm sorry. You're the one I actually can't bear to lose.

He nodded and smiled at me. "Cool," he said.

I saw it in his eyes, he gets it. Thank goodness he gets it.

"Cool," I said back.

Later that day:

So, crazy stuff happened. The house got shot up and we ended up burying someone and we don't know where El is and then Argyle got in my face that this was all about my superhero girlfriend and they were probably going to kill her.

I just... I wasn't ready for that. The thought that she might die and not know how I feel about her. That they might kill her and we ended off like we did. That she might die and think I didn't love her at all.

I zoned out a bit after Argyle left for the van. I don't know how long I must have stared at the ground but when I looked up, Will was already looking at me. I was kind of taken aback. There was so much... compassion and... understanding in his eyes. I quickly looked away, but I also kept looking back up. It's hard to stare straight at something so kind and vulnerable, but I also never wanted to look away, just to make sure I was really seeing it.

Will pulled me aside after that, he wanted to comfort me about what Argyle said. But Argyle wasn't wrong. I said that I should have explained myself cause then maybe El would have taken me with her. Maybe if she knew how I actually felt about her. That I did actually love her, and could get her to understand what I meant, then she'd want me there with her for whatever she's going through right now. But I didn't know what to say, how to say it.

Then Will the Wise came back, and he told me how sometimes it's scary to open up how you want to. Because what if they don't like the truth?

How does he do that? He doesn't even really know what I'm talking about but he somehow knows exactly what to say. Like he gets it, somehow.

Days later:

So we were in the back of the van, me and Will. And Jonathan was driving while Argyle slept. Will was trying to cheer me up with some crazy plan to get rich in Vegas, but he saw right through me again and saw I was still upset. He said El would be okay, that we'll make it.

But that isn't my problem. What if after all of this is over, she doesn't need me anymore? That was what I said, but I really meant what if she doesn't want me around anymore? She already didn't want me around when I couldn't say what she wanted to hear, what happened after all this stuff with the Upside Down is over? There isn't going to be anything keeping her in my life. And it'll really be over. I don't offer her anything.

I said that meeting El was just simple dumb luck. She needed someone back then, but she won't be needing me forever and after that she won't want me around. At least Lois Lane has something else going for her other than Superman. I don't have anything.

It was stupid to bring up, there was so much else going on. We had bigger problems. It's just easy to talk to Will. Especially when he sees right through me like that.

"You're scared of losing her," he said.

Yeah, exactly.

He gave me a painting after that. It was... incredible. I hadn't seen his art in months and I knew he was painting now but... wow. It's breathtaking. He's gotten so much more talented these past months.

"Did you paint this?" I asked. What I meant was did you paint this for me? He said yes, but that El commissioned it.

I don't know how to explain how I felt about that.

But Will kept talking, he said that I was the heart of the party. That El was so different from other people but I made her feel like she wasn't a mistake at all. That she was better for being different. And that gave her the courage to fight on. So yeah, she'd always need me. She'd always want me around.

I do know how I feel about that. Things with El feel more simple in my mind, I don't love her romantically but... she loves me like that? Maybe then I can tell her how I feel and she'll still want me around! If she'll always need me like Will just said, then hopefully she'll want me around as a friend! Hopefully she'll love me that much.

Someone loves me like that. And I can't help but love it. I can't help but smile and be relieved.

Someone loves me like that.

Later that night:

We found El. She was safe. She made a plan to help our friends in Hawkins and we set it up in the back of a Surfer Boy pizza. We were alone for a little bit, sitting at one of the tables. I made her laugh to try and lighten the mood.

She said she missed me, and that made me smile. Maybe she really did feel the way that Will said. Maybe if she really did love me like that then she'd still want me around after I tell her that I do love her, as a friend. I told her I missed her too, and that I'd had time to think about our argument a few days before. I was about to tell her the thing I really wanted to say most when Argyle came up with a pizza and stopped the conversation.

Once again, I can't say what's been on my mind.

And then later, El was in the mind fight and she started choking. I was so scared she was going to die. I froze. I was holding her hand and watching her choke.

Will reached for my shoulder and he reminded me that I'm the heart.

I'm supposed to hold her together. I make her feel better for being different. It gives her the courage to fight on.

Yeah?

Yeah.

And so I tell her I'm here and that I love her. Because it's true. I don't know how she's gonna hear it. But I force the words past my lips because she needs to hear it in whatever way she takes it. Maybe right now it doesn't matter how I mean it, just that it's true.

I said I was sorry I didn't say it more. But what I really meant was that I was sorry I didn't say it at all. But Will and Jonathan were there, and they think that El and I have been trading I love yous for the past several months. I couldn't let them know that I never said it at all. Especially not Will. Not after he made that painting for me. That painting symbolized everything that Will said about El's love for me. Admitting that I never said I loved El at all would be like spitting in his face.

I hope El knows what I mean, though. She knows I never said it. And I told her that I was never scared of her but that I was scared that she wouldn't need me anymore. That if I said how I really felt, that I loved her as a friend, then losing her would hurt more. Because then it wouldn't be that I lost her because I didn't love her. But because my love wasn't good enough.

I told her I didn't know how to live without her. That I felt like my life started the day we found her in the woods. Which feels true. I don't really remember life before Will went missing and we found her. Everything started when Will went missing and we found El. Everything before the Upside Down is a blur to me. And El has been there since the beginning of all this craziness, she's kept us safe. I can't imagine my life without her in it. She's one of my best friends, how could I imagine it without her?

I told her I loved her from the beginning, in the rain. I don't know how true that was. But she was my hope. She was gonna help us find Will, how do you not love hope? But more importantly, I wanted her to know that I didn't ever think she was the monster. If to her, the difference between thinking that I see her as a monster or a loved one is saying Love Mike, then I'll say Love Mike.

I hope she knows what I mean, but right now I guess it doesn't matter how she takes it, as long as she lives.

So I tell her I love her on her good days, her bad days, with her powers, without her powers. I love her for exactly who she is. She's my superhero. I know she didn't like that term when I said it earlier. But it's true. She's one of my best friends, my superhero. It doesn't mean I love her less. Or that I don't see her for who she is, cause she is also so much more.

And I said I couldn't lose her, which is also true. I lost both her and Will too many times to count. I can't lose either of them again. But it's not Will on the table choking to death, it's El.

And so I need her to know that she can do anything. I believe it, if she started flying or moving mountains I wouldn't be shocked. And so I believe that she can win this too. That she can fight and she can win.

I hope she hears what I mean, and if she doesn't, I hope she hears what she wants to hear. So that she can have the courage to fight on.

Two days later:

El lost the battle. Max is in a coma. And Will told me that now that we were back in Hawkins, he could feel One. He's alive and he wants everything and everyone and he won't stop. And my heart just... plummets into my gut.

Not again, not Will. Not Will with that terrified look in his eyes. The Upside Down has always wanted Will for some reason, and with One still alive, he's back in the line of fire again.

"We have to kill him," Will said.

I put my hand on his shoulder, I just needed to ground myself, and him. I didn't want him to float away, or get kidnapped, or possessed in front of my eyes again.

"We will," I told him.

I don't know what's going to become of my relationship with El. What she heard me say two days ago. Or what she thinks of anything, she hasn't really talked to me since it happened. But right now Will needs me. And I've always stayed by his side and had his back when the Upside Down strikes. And this time will be no different.

We stood on the flower field where I picked El's flowers just a week before. The flowers were decaying right before my eyes. And the sky was ripped open in shades of red and black, matching the rips in the ground all over Hawkins.

The three of us approach the sight together, but as Will and I stop to stare, El moves past us to stand in front. Closer, and on her own.

The sight was horrifying. What would we face together to bring down One this time?

I didn't know what was going to come, but I had Will by my side and El in front of us. Our guardian, as always.

And somehow, despite all the terror around us, it felt right.

#tell me what you think!#byler #stranger things #mike wheeler #will byers #eleven #thoughtsfromthequeen

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memes-saved-me · 2 years

Note

Max is probably the character I'm most indifferent about. I understand she went through a lot and there are times when she can be enjoyable but a lot of the time for me personally I really don't like her!

My main gripe with her though is that even after Billy's death not once does she ever bring up the abuse Billy had to endure all his life. The only time she mentions Neil is when she literally tells Billy's grave that he left Susan and Max (like that is supposed to make things better)

And you can't say she didn't know what was going on, SHE'D SEEN IT FIRST HAND! In runaway Max she witnesses Billy getting hit with a belt!!!

I honestly wished she had told the party about it, like she brings up how miserable Billy could make her at times but then she explains that it was because Neil made his life a living hell and he didn't have an outlet to take out all his anger on other than Max (even if he didn't want hurt her the way he did) she talks about how everytime she got into trouble Billy would take the blame and suffer for it.

The party could see Billy in a new light: at first they all thought he was an asshole who only looked out for himself when in reality he only had himself to look at for. Billy didn't have anyone supporting him or on his side, he barely had any friends back in Cali. Neil had taught him to never express his emotions to others and therefore he closed himself off to the rest of the world. Hoping that someone would recognize his reckless behaviour and try to help him.

Sorry for the rant, I just really hope the Duffers can pull their head out of their ass and fully redeem Billy's character and his relationship with Max. Have a scene where ghost Billy (not Vecna!Billy real Billy) is speaking Max while she is in a coma and he apologizes for how he acted and Max tells Billy she understands what he went through and that she knew a part of him did care for her. Billy admits that he did always want them to have a sibling relationship but he was so afraid of opening up only to get hurt again, which is why he acted out around her. The two get there closure and say that they love each other (maybe Max goes with him to the afterlife) that's how I want their arcs to end.

With them getting closure and starting to rebuild their relationship in the afterlife

I love Max but the Duffers let her (& Billy) down in S4. That scene with Lucas where he's talking about his guilt of not saying anything to Patrick about his abuse drives me insane because I was sitting there expecting Max to say something along the lines of, "I know how you feel. Billy was the same. I saw it happen but didn't do anything and I can't change it." That would have been such a simple moment to not only let Lucas and then inturn through general group knowledge know Billy was abused but also for them to have a genuine moment of relatability. It would have been nice for them to have a heart to heart about grief and actually have someone to speak to about it but nope.

The fact no one. Not a soul connects the dots of Max being depressed and her watching her brother die. I like to think she spoke to El about it before she left but after that was alone because no one else could understand.

Don't even get me started on Neil getting away with everything and Susan becoming a neglectful parent leaving Max well and truly alone.

I don't have big hopes for Billy's character from now on but I seriously hope I'm surprised by s5

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theinheriteddutchess · 8 months

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I used to watch "Dark Angel" religiously, but I was just a little shit, so I don't remember Jensen at all. 😂 I got tired of SPN after a while, but The Boys refueled my interest in Jensen 'cause he was really good. I'd like to see Misha in more projects too, I feel like Jensen and Misha have more potential than Jared (sorry Jay). But you know, there's nothing wrong with doing cons, JJM seem to enjoy it a lot. Chris though... I feel like he'd hate it, even tho I still think it's in his future.

You don't remember Jensen Ackles, who single handedly stole almost all the attention away from Michael Weatherly and was the cause for some of the drama behind the scenes because of his popularity?

This Jensen?:

Who had one episode as Ben, the x5 who went on a murder spree and Max had to kill so he wouldn't be taken back to Manticore and put with the "nomlies"? Who after that one episode convinced the makers to bring him back in a bigger role because they liked his work? Who was an instant hit with the viewers?

Or Alec who was supposed to be the bad guy but turned out to be fun and charming and who made Max look like a sour puss and Logan boring? Who has great expressions and deliveries of his lines?

You forgot about him?? 😲

I tried watching supernatural after dark angel, but i couldn't get into it, so forgot and then something got me on a jensen bender and i gave it another try and i got really into it. Until s5. Then i stopped buying the seasons dvds,and life interrupted, and then suddenly there were lots of other seasons that had passed me which they did suddenly send out (my country is really good with not showing anything, or behind your back years later continuing on a different channel at different times) ... and so i have watched some episodes of some later seasons, but missed a lot too.

Haven't watched the boys yet. I am on poor men's tv, and don't know how to be able to watch it without spending a lot more money and a lot more effort to find ways to see it. But i do want to watch it because Jensen is looking so so good...😳

And yeah i think those two might be easier to get a variety of roles and have proven to play different characters well.

Although look at the acting Jared shows in a Christmas Cottage, where his cry scene is top notch... I'm so sorry jared, it's just what i remember all these years later, is that it was a lot.

At least he's looking cozy and they styled his hair. It's almost unnerving.

Oh look i found some gifs to give you the idea if you haven't seen it:

I mean i want to add all of them, but you should really see for yourself. It's a lot! A lot.

And look at how different Jensen cries. I think we all wish we could look like this crying. We probably look more like Jared...

Shall i see how misha cries? Or is this post already too long? Ah who cares?

This is overused...

This one's weird

This is a picture of Toby Maguire crying, which has nothing to do with this whole subject but jeez it's ugly.

I was going to try to put Jeffrey in here, but tumblr said enough! Which might be wise but annoying.

As for your last sentence, there's a lot of Chris's. Chris Evans, Chris(tian) Kane, Chris Martin whose music i don't listen to, or know anything about and i don't think he does cons. What would he even talk about.

I hope it's not Chris Martin because I don't want to look him up and find anything out. Not that i hate him, i just never think of him. He just came up as one of the chris's in a search. He looks like a lot of British singers had a lovebaby together.

If it's chris evans, i feel he'll like the first one, does okay with the second, grows tired and bored an annoyed and anxious by the time the third one comes around. Honestly the crowds, inappropriate questions and the constant noise would wear me out very quickly too, so i can't blame him. They seem fun but once in a while.

Thanks for sending the ask, it probably wasn't what your were looking for👍

#toby maguire #well he is in the post #supernatural #misha collins #jensen ackles #jared padalecki #jeffrey dean morgan #crying #which was not the subject anon talked about #but I'm nothing if not sufficient in derailing a conversation #I'm sure anon regrets ever sending me an ask now #answered ask #but not in the way intended

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yurtletheturtlehenderson · 2 years

Text

COSMIC - S3:E6; Chapter Six, E Pluribus Unum - [Pt. 4]

A Will Byers x Fem!Reader Series

𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘺, 𝘦𝘭 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘭𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘴. 𝘥𝘶𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘢 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘢 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘶𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺/𝘯 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴. 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦, 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘹 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘨𝘰, 𝘮𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘳𝘪𝘱𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘺/𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭'𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴.

⚠️: (1) very brief mention of anxiety, (comedic) filler dialogue is not my strong suit unless i have a purpose for it, sassy will, protective Max, Jonathan being a good bro, Lucas and Y/n being iconic as usual, and a little bit of a third-wall break from me calling out the show's logic 😀 why this is my breaking point? idk

📝: let us have some lumax... as a ✨️treat✨️

🔑: b/f = breakfast food (if you don't eat breakfast, it can be anything really)

"Will, you know you can--," Mike sighed with a wince, no doubt trying to be the friend he was last year. Almost like he had forgotten how to be. "you can be honest with me about this stuff. I get it, man. I do. What you went through last year was... scary. It was really scary,"

||𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋'𝐒 𝐏𝐎𝐕||

-MINUTES EARLIER-

Looking up from my last few bites of cereal and peeking through the window I barely make out the two of them sitting on the porch together. From what I can see, which isn't very much, the air is still very much tense. I can only see the back of her head as she sits to the left of Mike, but as he looks at her... I don't know, he almost looks shocked. Relieved? I can't very well make it out when the two of them keep turning away, but it's likely for the best. They need their privacy.

"I appreciate that, Mike." A passing glimpse of my old friend makes me smile, but I can't bring myself to all the way. Not with all the dangers we're still facing.

I take another bite, my attention wandering to the living room where the others are still gathered. Jonathan and Nancy are pretty much just bouncing theories back and forth between themselves now, and Lucas and Max have grown aware of the two missing party members out on the porch.

"She's not giving up anytime soon, is she?" Mike asked, his voice lost farther away in guilt than his eyes as he watched her pace.

Any instinct I'd normally have to get protective doesn't come. It's clear, for once in a long time, there's no ill intent. Just a glimpse of the old Mike; the one who, Y/n had told me of, had given Dustin a certain best friend speech all that time ago.

"Can you blame her?"

I know for certain I'm not the only one who misses how things used to be. It's something that comes up often, whether in stolen moments or subtle glances. Lucas, Dustin, and I most of all, had been there for the most tight-knit of days back in elementary school. But no matter how much we try and intervene, it's been proven many times over this is something only they can fix.

Looking back out, I see Y/n setting down her comm on the steps at her feet. Mike is watching her carefully. He looks the most vulnerable I think I can ever remember seeing him. Probably since that night with the Mind Flayer.

I shake my head of the thought and creeping blush and return to my cereal. I really need to give them privacy.

Nothing about their friendship stands a chance if I'm breathing down their neck. I should know this by now, it's happened before. Granted, things were never this bad in fifth grade-- shoot! A couple of pieces tumble off my spoon as I try to eat them, my head ducking after them in reflex but it does nothing. I feel myself frown instinctually as they fall back into the milk with a small plop and looking up at the others I'm glad to see no one saw. But they were starting to break off from each other and mill about.

Swallowing the last bites of my cereal and downing the remaining bit of milk before rinsing my bowl, I was at Max and Lucas' side at a moment's notice. They had since gotten up from the couch and were lingering by the phone, not so subtly trying to catch a glimpse at the two outside every once in a while.

Prying a pointer finger free from the arms folded against his chest, Lucas gestures wearily to the window. "Are they actually," His eyes meet with Max once before landing on mine, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise. "talking?"

Glancing back at the two, I find them both still facing out at the forest. It's hard to tell if either of them is speaking. Mike looks as if he's staring at his shoes and I wonder to myself just what might have pushed him to this point. What finally brought him here?

"Yeah," I nod with a small smile. "I mean, hopefully."

Max narrowed her eyes over my shoulder, and I have no doubts she's trying to scope out the air between the two. "Isn't that, like, a fire hazard?"

"Hey," I chide, despite the half-hearted chuckle that arose at the comment. "Watch it. Besides, this is progress. We all wanted this."

She wastes no time in tossing me a blatantly playful 'you know what I mean' look and shrugs it off. "Well, duh, yeah! In a perfect world those two would be best friends and not just for the sake of appearances, but, Will, face it. They're just not. Besides," Max straightens, almost in a defensive manner as she prickles, her eyes settling on who I could only assume to be Mike. "no one could blame her. Not with the shit he's been pulling,"

The very hot and itchy feeling of anger in my chest I had been getting well acquainted with threatened to return at the many examples gathered over the past two years. But none quite so much as the memory of the mall.

She looked around quickly, her voice falling into a whispered hiss. "What, so I should be locked up all day, too?"

"Maybe!"

A sharp breath escapes without me trying as the moment shoots to the surface above most of the rest. Most.

"It's not my fault you can't move on!"

That was a side of Mike I thought I'd never see. I never thought it could even exist. But I was wrong. It did exist. But as ridiculous as it sounds, the more things unravel, the more I start to see the old Mike. The Mike that was willing to put his pride aside for the sake of his friends cause at the end of the day, the ones he loved were what mattered most. Even if it meant going on a long, stumbling ramble he meant to be an apology.

"And I guess... I feel like I've been losing you to her. That once you two got together, I wouldn't ever see you. Which is totally stupid, I know, cause, like she said... friends don't do that..." he looks at me sincerely. Apologetically. "You wouldn't do that, and you haven't... and even worse, I went and did that exact same thing."

It was true Mike wasn't who he used to be. But something in my gut was telling me he wasn't all gone. And I refused to believe he was. It was the least I could do for him. After all, he did the same for me.

Hardly any time had passed before Lucas seemed to jump in with similar thoughts.

"They used to be," he admitted wistfully, causing Max to straighten in curiosity. "Best friends, I mean."

"Who, those two?" Max laughed, shaking her head in disbelief. But I could see it dying in her eyes fairly quickly when she met my gaze. And all either of us could offer her was a simple shrug. "Wait, you guys are serious? I thought they always just, you know, tolerated each other?"

"They do now," I say, "barely," and Lucas nods solemnly along.

"It's true. I mean, don't forget, Mike once jumped off a cliff for her and Dustin,"

Apparently, Max hadn't heard about that story before. Her head jerked flat to the back of her shoulders as she rapidly blinked, looking as if she had short-circuited back about three hours in time.

"Uhm, sorry," Max threw a dry laugh at both of us. "He what now?"

"I told you this!" Lucas insisted with great shock. "Last year. At the arcade. Ya know, when you didn't believe me?"

"No, no, no. You told me Dustin, Y/n, Mike and you got in a huge fight about El. The three of them went looking for her, got chased down by those bullies. And basically, a bunch of shit went down: Troy knocked Y/n out, getting ready to kick the shit out of her or something, and Mike and Dustin were nearly killed defending her until El showed up. But you didn't exactly go into detail,"

Lucas threw his shoulders up in defense. "If I did skim on the on details, it was because you kept eyeing the door like you were gonna bolt!" Max crossed her arms in a challenging manner, but I smiled a little to myself when I saw the signs of their lighthearted argument. Neither of them was mad and both held traces of amusement. "Besides... I wasn't there. I was on the other side of town. You know, doing real work and finding the gate. I warned everyone about the bad men."

Max was clearly fighting a losing battle with a smile, her lips puckering harder as she tried not to crack. But the more sheepish Lucas grew the more she melted.

"So you really didn't know he jumped off of a cliff?"

"No!" She turned to me, playfully batting at my arm and 'turning' back on Lucas. "Stalker here didn't exactly specify. So what the hell happened?"

Lucas shrugged again, trying to recall the details he had heard from the others. I do as well. It's then I realize neither of us were actually there for the encounter. "Apparently Troy and James cornered them at the quarry like I said. Mike couldn't throw for shit but apparently Troy could. It did a number on Y/n—she was out for most of it, I don't think she realizes Troy was ready to give her a few broken ribs while she was out,"

"Jesus," Max mutters, eyes drifting away.

I don't bother nodding. I'm too focused on trying to find a spot in the room to take my mind off of the growing pit in my stomach and the grit in my teeth. No wonder I avoided the details. I really hate hearing this story.

Judging by Max's reaction throughout, she didn't love it either. It was all I could do to tune out. I didn't want to hear it again, once was enough. The story of Y/n nearly punching Troy's lights out, however, I could listen to any day.

I'm not sure what makes me decide to tune in again, but when I do, Lucas is wagging his finger thoughtfully at Max as he recalls. Maybe it's something she said about this sounding familiar.

"Hey, I did mention the cliff. I specifically remember saying Mike jumped off of a freaking. cliff."

Max thinks hard on it for a second before something in her face catches. She gives us each a wince before focusing it on Lucas. "Maaaybe there's a slight possibility you did?"

He threw his arms up in exasperation and I chuckled. "Are you serious?" I ask, thoroughly amused by the whole ordeal.

"I don't know! Cut me some slack, I was brand new, and some randos start stalking me--" without taking her eyes off of me she affectionately nudges Lucas with her arm, causing a small smile to break out on his face as he looks down at her. "--hot and cold, hot and cold, and then dumps this elaborate sci-fi story in my lap, insisting I never say a word! I guess I convinced myself it was all bullshit and then when it wasn't, I didn't pick everything up. That or if I did catch on I didn't take it literally. It happens."

Lucas and I shared a look before we met her now defensive stance. It wasn't very hard to tell however there wasn't much bite to it. She gave way easily with a small roll of eyes and an 'Oh, like you two are so perfect,' just as Nancy stepped up to us.

"Sorry, guys," she flashed a quick, polite smile as she squeezed in to use the phone. All of us stepped out of her way, and it was then I caught Jonathan's eye back in the kitchen. "Thanks,"

I excused myself with a quick nod and wandered back into the kitchen where Jonathan was. He stood arms outstretched, propping himself up on the counter as Nancy began dialing the first of many numbers on a small notepad before stepping as far into the living room as she could.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey,"

Looking down at the counter between us, I spotted the open phonebook the two of them had previously been studying. Several addresses were marked, other pages of the book were dog-eared. But I had a sneaking suspicion our search for the flayed was going to be a lot more complicated than going through Hawkins with a fine-tooth comb.

"Any theories?"

Jonathan shakes his head and shrugs.

"It's all pretty much in the air right now," he flips a few pages before ultimately letting them all fall back into place. "But my best guess says if anything is going on, it's somewhere it doesn't draw a lot of eyes,"

All I can do in this moment is nod as my mind returns to the heavy picture. I can feel his eyes on me as I move back further into the kitchen and start digging through the fridge. Jonathan turns around to face me and I can hear the curiosity in his voice.

"Didn't you just eat?"

"It's not for me," I answer, retrieving a few things from inside and closing the fridge.

Jonathan looks (not so) subtly between me and the view of the front porch outside as a knowing look crosses his face. I try not to pay him any mind as I pull a dish out from the cabinet and begin making b/f with the necessities from the fridge and cupboards.

"I don't want to hear it," I say, and he cracks a smile.

"I didn't say anything,"

"Then you think really loud,"

"Will, come on," Jonathan chuckled, dropping his ballpoint pen on the phone book and turning to face me completely. He nods towards the window and speaks at a volume only we can hear. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about. You have someone you care about, who—and I have it on pretty good authority—cares about you too."

"Then why do I not like where this is going?"

"Maybe because you're not used to this kind of territory? Maybe this is all new to you still and you might be a little nervous—all of that's totally fine, you know. It's normal."

"Or maybe I don't really want to have an awkward conversation about relationships right now?"

"Ouch," he frowned despite a small dry laugh. "But fair. I guess? The point is, Will--" he stops mid-sentence, looking for the right words. He sighs. "I don't know, it's just. It's nice. It's nice seeing you happy. The both of you, I mean,"

Acting like my blush wasn't there, I looked up from my task for the first time since starting it. Just out of my peripherals I could sense Jonathan following my line of sight to the two people I couldn't keep off of my mind for long.

"You're conflicted," Jonathan says in realization. His voice is quiet, likely for my sake. But all I can focus on is the mindblowing fact that I haven't visibly confirmed his suspicions in any way. Unless he can tell my heart rate just skipped a beat.

To my surprise, I'm completely calm despite it all. I look out there and I see my two best friends, two of the many people I love, and the one person I want to be with. Tentatively, she reaches out for Mike's hand that lays still at his side and places hers over in a tender grip. He gratefully squeezes her hand back, and though I can't see her face, I can see Mike's: there's resolve in his watering eyes and a smile of relief. Seeing it all, I'm not surprised my answer for Jonathan is so sure.

Taking the last of Y/n's breakfast in hand, finally prepared, I turn to Jonathan with a certain growing clarity.

"No," I smile. It feels so good to say and as I'm saying it, it's like a nagging question I never even got to ask has been lifted off of my chest. For the first time, any scary feeling I don't necessarily understand with Mike is something I feel like I can actually tackle. Cause one thing is for certain, and it's something Y/n has helped me realize; I'm not alone. "I'm really not,"

||𝟑𝐑𝐃 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐏𝐎𝐕||

By the time Mike and Y/n had returned, Will had gotten Y/n's breakfast laid out on the breakfast bar. Nancy had already hung up the phone on her first three numbers and was dialing her fourth when the wooden creak of the screen door pulled everyone's attention to the unlikely sight of Mike and Y/n simpering and hiding chuckles under their breaths, not unlike old times. Both of them quickly discovered the attention fixed on them and came to a slow, the screen door bouncing shut behind them.

Rather than address the elephant in the room and eager to move on, Y/n gave the many lingering eyes a half-hearted shrug. "What'd we miss?"

She was met with awkward upturned lips and several shrugs right back. Nancy just turned back to whoever had just answered the phone.

"Y/n?"

Ever grateful for the sound of her partner's voice, Y/n gladly accepted the excuse to step away and came to meet Will. She released a mixed sigh as the room dispersed once more. Glancing over Y/n's shoulder, Will caught a glimpse of Mike as he joined what looked to be a prying Lucas and Max. His warm eyes falling back over his partner, Will spoke up with a hopeful glint to match his lowered tone.

"How'd it go?" he prompts, returning to his seat on the inner bar stool. Y/n followed suit without even thinking, taking a seat to his left as he nudged the b/f further into sight with a hopeful smile.

Butterflies lit up in his stomach in tune with the smile that lit up her face at the welcome sight. Already diving in with a mouthful, her thanks a muffled 'mmk ymm' and a tight and grateful squeeze on his arm before she could even get properly settled in her seat.

"Can't believe I'm saying this," she began after swallowing her first bite. She flashed Will a mischievous smile, and he couldn't help but notice a layer to her he hadn't seen in ages. "But I just might be thinking twice about killing him,"

"Oh, well, that's a step in the right direction," Will nodded, more than happy to play along.

"I think so, yes."

Y/n chuckled with him as her attention traveled steadily to Mike's increasingly tensing figure. Upon returning, he had quickly taken note of his absent girlfriend—or, ex-girlfriend, he reminded himself. She was still in her room, using her powers and exerting herself for the sake of everyone. All over again. And while her determination to do the right thing had been one of the many things about El to have won his heart, he couldn't easily fight the tightening clutch at his chest.

"Holy shit, you're alive," Lucas had mused the moment Mike had joined their side.

"Ha ha,"

Max took sudden hold of his wrists, much to Mike's (very visible) disdain, lifting his arms above her head, making a show to inspect him. "Nope," she concluded with a lopsided smirk as he yanked his hand away. "no sign of third-degree burns. You behaved! I'm surprised,"

"I get it alright?" Mike looked around, quickly letting go of his frustrations much to the Mayfield girl's surprise. Nevertheless, her folded arms and sharp sigh indicated she wasn't easily convinced of his new change, but she was willing to give him this. But she could steadily feel her walls rebuilding themselves at Mike's next comment. "Where's El? She's not still in there looking for the Flayed, is she?"

Lucas shrugged. "Yeah, but I'm sure it's fine. She said it could take a while,"

The lesson with Y/n freshly learned on his mind was just enough to keep him from blurting out his concerns. But the worry still clutched at his heart, and Mike feared it just might take control. It took just about everything in him to keep his voice steady and his mind open.

"Okay, but shouldn't we at least check on her? It can't be good for her to be looking this long, it takes a lot out of her,"

"Mike," Max sighed. "If she says she can handle it, then you let her handle it,"

Mike nodded, chewing on his bottom lip to keep his worries from spilling out. But it only delayed them. Max rolled her eyes in great exasperation when he let loose the breath that had been holding them back. "Okay, but what if she's just saying that so we don't worry? Like—not that she knows she can't handle it or anything, but that she knows she needs a break but she doesn't want to waste any time cause that's just who she is--"

"--Just relax, Mike. Give her a chance. For her. She's done this a million times,"

"That's kind of my point. She's always putting herself on the line and draining her battery for the sake of the group, it can't be good for her."

"Yeah, micromanaging her can't be too good for her either," Max huffed, Mike not far behind her. "And it's not like we're making her do this, or it's just all for us. She's saved countless people,"

It was clear to anyone watching the two were elbow-deep in their newest 'debate'. Having sat through just about one too many himself, Lucas knew he could slip away quietly without their noticing, and whatever was going on at the breakfast bar was looking far more appealing than another fight.

Lucas noticed Y/n was already halfway through her breakfast when he joined them, but with over five years of friendship with a Henderson under his belt, stuff like this didn't surprise him. Just like the Byers, they didn't like stuff going to waste. But the look growing on her face as she, Will, and Jonathan watched silently as Nancy fought to get a word in over the phone said otherwise—it was obvious Y/n's worries were seeding in her stomach at record speeds.

"Yes, yes, um, I was just..." Nancy shook her head around as she tried to summon the words. She remained in the corner of the kitchen, notepad in hand, crease in her brow, and desperation begging to escape her voice. This was one of their last possible leads, they had tried everything else. "following up to see if anything else had gone missing, or if-- okay,"

Nancy's shoulders sunk in defeat, falling low much like the tone in her voice. Behind her, the four listening in exchanged wary glances.

"Um, sorry to bother--"

Nancy didn't have to tell them the dial tone had been the one to cut her off this time. She had pulled the phone away with a huff before slamming it on the hook with a harsh 'twing'. Frustrated sighs echoing hers rippled out amongst the kitchen as everyone visibly deflated. Apart from Y/n, who, with a grumble, had grabbed her now empty dish and walked it over to the sink. Jonathan made sure to cross out the number in the phone book (not without a bitter scowl) and Nancy came to his side, eager to get a glance over his shoulder.

"Who's next?"

"There is no next," Jonathan said. "Unless you want to start calling random people's homes,"

Nancy chucked her notepad on the counter in an agitated manner. "It doesn't make any sense,"

"What part of any of this makes sense?"

"There's a pattern, okay?" Nancy insists. "A consistency to their behavior. They've been feeding on these chemicals since this started an-and what? They just stop out of the blue?"

"Maybe they have all the chemicals they need?" Will wondered aloud. "Maybe they've all turned into those things?"

"But what about the source? I mean, did the Mind Flayer just suddenly stop infecting people? And, even if the flayed are monsters now, why can't El find them?"

The sudden clang of a freshly Y/n's washed dish sliding into the drying rack pulled all attention to her.

"Why can't anyone?" she said with a thoughtful hitch in her voice, eager to make her way back to Will's side. Planting herself against the wall between Will and Lucas, she gestured over her shoulder out front where Nancy's car was still parked. "wouldn't we have heard something about it on the radio? An emergency broadcast on the drive in about the hospital—I mean someone had to have seen something. Or at least, if this is happening everywhere, wouldn't we have heard something by now?"

"Well, I don't know about the hospital but don't they hide?" Lucas gestured to Will curiously. "Didn't you say he uses you only when he needs you?"

He nodded gravely. "He does. But that's what we really need to worry about. If he was hiding in people like Tom and Mrs. Driscoll on top of possessing Billy, who knows how many people he could get ahold of?"

-"Okay, can you guys settle something for us?"

Max came striding up with Mike close in tow, cutting all conversation short.

Y/n's arms involuntary interlock over her chest as she braces herself for whatever is to come. She tries, at the very least, to remind herself of her friends' patience with her own arguments with Mike—so she didn't exactly have room to complain about an awkward situation.

"Who do you think should decide El's limits: Mike, or Eleven?"

"Okay, the way that you're framing that is so unfair,"

"There's nothing unfair about it, Mike, this is your whole problem! It's also precisely the reason she dumped your ass,"

Y/n couldn't stop the weak and tired plea of her best friend's name from slipping past her lips. Just when she thought the worst had been put aside, she was realizing all too late she wasn't the only one involved in an inner-party conflict. All of this had been lost, however, in Nancy's shock.

"El dumped you?"

Mike's cheeks flushed red and the hot static in his chest was sparking but he did what he could to roll it off his shoulders.

"Does it matter? My point is, I don't think it's a good idea she be in there that long,"

Max bristled at this—whether from subconscious connections to her own trauma at home, her newfound protectiveness for El, or a powerful combination of the two. Regardless, she was quick to fire back on behalf of her new friend.

"Of course it matters! You never trust her to do anything. All you can accuse me of is enlightening her—how to be her own person," in the blink of an eye, Max had zeroed in on Y/n with a hopeful glint, confused as to why her other best friend was shooting her a 'what the hell' look. "Come on, Y/n, tell him. He's being ridiculous,"

Y/n straightened up off the wall, looking around at all the eyes suddenly on her. Her mouth fell open and shut once or twice before she cleared her throat. Something told her she was not going to get the best reaction.

"What, you really want my input?"

Incredulous, Max nodded. "Besides the fact you've been complaining about not seeing El all year," Almost no one caught the split-second exchange between Mike and Y/n before the silent understanding fizzled out when they broke their gaze. "you're basically in the same boat as El." Max continued, none the wiser. "I mean, I'd say the same thing about Will if he was going around telling you how and when to use your powers,"

Y/n stayed silent apart from the small sigh taking place of a coherent answer. Her eyes dropped to the floor as if the courage lay somewhere within the details of the old floorboards. But it didn't stay, it returned to Max and the others with stubborn confidence, and the grip on her arms subtly tightened.

"I'm sorry Max, but I think I agree with Mike on this one,"

Silence. Silence, and then--

"--Seriously?!"

Max and Mike shared a fleeting distasteful glance at having had the same thought, but both were quick to shake it off. The others seemed just as shocked.

"Y/n, you cannot be serious right now,"

Her stance begged to stiffen at Max's reaction, but she had been anticipating this. Especially as her mind returned to the day this drama all started days ago—when El had first sought their council; Max had been quite eager for El to dump her boyfriend, and completely disregarded her own suggestion to talk things out. But with that memory, also came the heart-melting sight of El discovering her true sense of self for the first time in her entire life. This only prompted Y/n to quickly explain.

"That doesn't mean I don't agree with you, Max—about El needing to be her own person." Y/n settled on Mike as she said this, her tone towards him, for the first time in ages, gentle and pleading. "Mike, I know you. And I also know how much she means to you. But that's exactly why you of all people should understand how important it is she discovers who she is outside of her relationships with other people--

"--exactly."

"--she has never had that opportunity before."

"--exactly."

"--And you should have seen her," a somber smile threatened Y/n's face made Mike falter as he imagined the sight. "She was so happy."

"--exactly!"

"Max?"

"Sorry," Max pursed her lips but quieted all the same.

"That's something you should want for her. And you know what, it's good for you too. And I'm not just saying that because, as much shit as we may or may not have been saying behind your back--"

"--You've what?"

"--not important--" Mike caught Will's eye over Y/n's shoulder and he felt a murmur in his heart again when they shared a tiny, noiseless laugh as Y/n continued, unaware. Just a small breath of air, barely noticeable but enough. "we missed hanging out with you. With you and El. None of us have seen you, actually present with us since the snowball, and it's been hard."

Max felt the satisfaction drain from her as soon as Y/n turned back to her.

"But Max, you wanted my opinion and here it is: I get what he's saying. And yeah, that's coming from someone like El. That's exactly why I agree, actually."

"But Y/n...?"

"Again, I'm not saying El shouldn't make her own decisions. They're her powers, she knows them better than anyone and she should be the one calling the shots. But..."

The memories hadn't stopped. Frankly, she was willing to spend as much time as she could get out on that porch even if she wasn't calling for her brother, who, infuriatingly enough, was still MIA. Between Will's presence, the distraction of the task at hand, and the current argument unfolding before everyone's eyes, it had done enough to keep the memories from last November on the back burner. But now, the pot was boiling over and spilling out as she somberly met eyes with the only two in the room who had been there with her during her endeavor. Even among the chaos of saving Will, each of them had found room to look out for her.

With one look, Y/n knew both Jonathan and Nancy were reliving everything with her. Will might have been reunited with them that night, but they were the only two to remember what it took to get there.

"But having someone looking out for you can make all the difference,"

Nancy and Jonathan knew at once what she had been referring to—Jonathan more than anyone. The sight of her strain as she put her life on the line to save his brother was something he would never forget.

"Especially when in situations like this. It is—and should be—our choice but it isn't much of one. Not when the people we love, and many more are in danger."

Max had yet to consider that, and it was clear to all by the shift in her feet and subtle change in demeanor. That didn't mean she was too happy with where this conversation was going, but she would much rather hear Y/n out than Mike.

Poorly masking the slouch in her posture with crossed arms, Max sent a small pout Y/n's way. "So what, then? You want her to stop?"

"No, I never said that." Y/n quickly defends. "Just, maybe you should try and see where Mike is coming from. He's worried about her and I kinda understand why. She's been through a lot trying to protect everyone. Twice. And now, the Mind Flayer is back with his-- little--" her nose scrunched up as she fought the words she still couldn't believe she was uttering. "flesh monsters-- the flayed—whatever. And that's a lot of responsibility with a line she probably shouldn't cross but she's willing to cause that's just the kind of person she is. But it doesn't mean she can't get scared or that it doesn't help to know someone's looking out for her, or willing to cross one for her,"

Y/n finished with a huff, not realizing until now she had never stopped to take a breath. She could feel the stares of the others, all a mix of worry and confusion on their faces, but she didn't much care at the moment. Her insides were winding back into knots so she allowed herself to sink back into the wall in between her boyfriend and Lucas. It wasn't long before Will's hand was rubbing soothing circles on her back as he looked up at her in concern, the conversation picking back up around them.

"She's not gonna be alone, Y/n," Nancy reassured, making sure the young girl met her eyes. She exchanged a single understanding glance with Jonathan before they both returned their soft gaze to her. "And neither are you. We're all here. Together. And we're all gonna be looking out for each other," she finishes, turning to make sure Mike heard. "But in order to do that, you have to trust us. You have to trust her,"

Mike could feel the tension returning to his shoulders and seizing up his body. His defenses were kicking in again. But he doesn't see the tension spilling off of him and pouring back into Y/n, who's cup was already running full.

"I do trust her," Mike defended.

His friend pulled her face from her palms which she had distressfully been rubbing up and down her cheeks, nose, and eyes, and gruffed impatiently at the boy. "Then why are you fighting this?"

"I thought you agreed with me!"

"I do! She should take a break, even if for a few minutes but--"

"--great," Mike jumped in, in his desperation to help El, disregarding what else his friend might have to say. Subconsciously, too afraid to hear it. "So let's get her,"

Max made a show of rolling her eyes and grasping the air angrily beside him.

"No!"

"Why not?!"

"Because that's not what she decided!"

"And if she hurts herself?!" He was yelling now, the panic in his voice no longer contained. Nancy made a move to say something but he cut her off before she could manage a single syllable. "Or gets herself killed?!"

"Mike," Jonathan's voice had cut in this time, laced with understanding, but Mike wouldn't have it. His worried had consumed him completely. He could hardly register the rising pitch of his own voice, let alone the looks he was etching onto everyone's faces around him.

"No, there's nothing that justifies that! I'm just trying to demonstrate how careless everyone here can be with El's powers. You're all treating her like a machine when she's not a machine and I don't want her to die looking for the Flayed when they've obviously vanished off the face of the earth. So can we PLEASE just come up with a new plan because I love her and I can't lose her again!"

The room had come to a stand still at the command of those very words. They clung to the air, silencing everyone and everything but the pounding drums in Mike's chest as he realizes what he has said. Shock had etched itself on everyone's faces and lodged Mike's next breath in his lungs—his gaze was miles away. Max felt her gaping mouth snap shut, and Will sensed the sudden gaze of his girlfriend burning into the side of his head.

It hadn't exactly been a secret—Mike and El's feelings for one another. But never before had it been brought to words. Not like this. And just when Mike was sure the silence was going to drown him, the gentle creak of the wooden door unveiled an even more gentle, wide-eyed gaze that roamed the group.

"What's going on?"

"Nothing," Mike insists, refusing to meet El's eyes. "Nothing."

"Just family discussion," said Lucas through a Chesire grin. This only prompted Y/n to bury her growing smirk in the crook of her elbow that rested on his shoulder.

Had he not known any better, Will would have said he noticed a certain sag in El's shoulders.

"Oh," she said with a hint of disappointment that lingered only for a moment. Drawing in a deep and courageous breath, El gave a nod. "I found him,"

Him? The group wondered simultaneously. El had been searching for many suspects—all of which they believed to be flayed. But there was just one 'him' to truly be worried about. One they all feared would slip past her lips the moment Nancy asked the question on everyone's minds—the question everyone already knew the answer to.

"Found who?"

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