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watevermelon · 3 years

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Jealous | Eita Semi x Reader

✧ Summary: You thought you were content with your relationship so far - Semi was your best friend and these past few years were some of the most memorable. But all of that quickly changes with some outside forces. ➳ Tags: Angst with a happy ending; some humor

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Four years ago, it would have been a strange sight to see you, an up-and-rising wing-spiker, sitting on the sideline of the Shiratorizawa volleyball team. Being the female team’s manager was nice, but just as ambiguous as the adjective. You sorely ached to be back as an active member on the court and you seemed to radiate that very thought throughout the schoolyear.

At the end of your first-year you were switched from official wing-spiker to sub-pinch server. That was a huge demotion in your eyes, but a position you would gladly accept now. You knees were deteriorating from overuse and it was only facilitated at the Spring Tournament during your first-year. A bad-land from a spike and you tore your ACL. From that injury, there was no going back. That took you off the regular team for the rest of the year, since your doctor recommended six-months of healing.

Torn ACL’s do not heal and you did not want to undergo surgery, since it would only prolong your time away from the court. That decision was terrible in itself, but you reasoned that your volleyball career would end after high-school. So the long-term implications did not affect your future in sports since you did not envision one.

But your career ended sooner than you thought.

You did not seek the advice of the athletic trainer or even your coach and attempted to do the same work-outs as the rest of the team. And for a good amount of time, they bought your act. It seemed you were a miraculous healer, despite the urgings of both your parents and physicians. Dates set aside for physical therapy were skipped and you opted to make yourself useful to the team.

But you were doing just the opposite.

The women of Shiratorizawa’s volleyball team had their eyes set on nationals and it seemed that you were on the right track. The team earned their spot in the finals of the Interhigh Tournament, garnering attention against Niiyama High. You were set to serve, aiming directly for the serious face of Amanai Kanoka. Mid-stride, something did not feel right and you landed, not on your feet, but on your front-side.

You looked up from your prone form on the ground to see the horrified faces of your teammates and opponents. The usually loud section of Shiratorizawa’s student body was stunned silent and everyone’s eyes were fixated on your figure. First aid was able to hoist your motionless body onto a stretcher and time seemed to momentarily stop. You could still distinctly recall the perturbed faces of your friends and family. In that very instant, you felt your heart crack and silently whispered goodbye to your beloved sport.

Your torn ACL developed into a long-lasting chronic deficiency and you were slowly losing control in knee movement.

Pity.

That was the only word to describe the certain expression other people gave you after the fact. Volleyball held a large amount of prominence on campus and the fact that nearly everyone saw your fall – it was humiliating. You were taken completely off the team and instead ushered into surgery and rehabilitation for your knee.

Many of your teammates attempted to show compassion and understanding for your situation, but they would never truly understand. You had accepted, deep in your heart, that even if you had undergone surgery early your knee would continually depreciate. It was only a matter of time.

The coach could understand your reasoning, but cursed your insolence. It hurt her that you desperately wanted to help the team, to the point of sacrificing your future. If she had known, she would have taken you off the starting-line in an instant. But there was no second chance, no benefit in asking what if’s.

The previous manager of the women’s team was leaving with graduation and you inherited her spot. On more than one occasion, you wondered if staying on as manager would really help you emotionally. It was your own personal hell, watching your previous teammates engage in volleyball and never getting the chance to join.

Graduation liberated many of your friends and majority of the people who observed your deterioration first-hand were gone. New volleyball teams were forming and you missed most of their names. Without the use of it on the court, it was harder to connect and really converse with the fresh first-years. You knew the names of the promising few – Goshiki Tsutomu was a hard one to miss. There were also two exemplary female wing-spikers, but Shiratorizawa’s team ran both deep and wide.

With all this distance, you would often miss much of the drama from those outside your year. Many of the other volleyball players made an effort not to bar you and updated you daily on news. Tendou was the number one instigator and you would often hear a warped version of the gossip from him first.

None of the male players were in the same class, ironically. There was one in each class and you shared yours with Eita Semi for the past three years. You were the closest to the mom of the group and he would usually clarify new gossip to you.

The groupchat shared amongst both the men’s and women’s volleyball team usually went ignored in your pocket. Once in a while, you would contribute a dank meme or comment. But for now, you tended to silently witness the drama unfold. Amongst the newly minted third-years was a groupchat just for you guys, both the girls and boys teams, which was the one you and Tendou seemed to haunt.

As such, you were texting away in the middle of class. You sat with Semi, who was diligently writing notes and following along with the teacher. Neither had yet to see you, but no matter who it was, they would pluck the phone right out of your hands.

GC: We’re the captains now. <(￣︶￣)>

12:43 From:s u f f e r i n g (。□°） I’m just saying, we can fight him.

12:43 From: Ushiwaka-sama I would prefer to leave the setter intact

12:43 From: Guess Monster（▼へ▼メ） Are we ignoring the problem of Goshiki????

12:43 From: Captain-Sama! He’s a wing-spiker not a middle-blocker. You don’t have to worry about your spot

12:43 From: Guess Monster（▼へ▼メ） ExCuSe youuuuuuuuuuu

12:44 From: Guess Monster（▼へ▼メ) I wouldn’t be afraid even if he was

It was severely clear to all volleyball members that your spot as a regular was never safe (unless of course your name started with a U and ended with -shiwaka.)

The coaches of either team were relentless in their words and would drop a team member if they showed enough weakness. And you would not be surprised even in the slightest if the essential vice-captain of the men’s team was benched for the newfound first-year. The anomaly of Goshiki Tsutomu could be found in the fact that he seemed to be the complete foil of his older teammates. Despite this, he showed the most promise and you almost wanted to bet money that he would be a regular by the Spring High Tournament.

12:44 From: Ushiwaka-sama Your numerable amount of question marks show your lie.

12:44 From: Guess Monster（▼へ▼メ） Why don’t you shut the fuck up

12:44 From: Ushiwaka-sama But I didn’t say anything

12:45 From: Captain-Sama! LMAO but seriously Soekawa has nothing to worry about

12:45 From: s u f f e r i n g (。□°） Even if he does I think we can take the coconut-head.

12:45 From: Guess Monster（▼へ▼メ） O mi god good one (f/n) I’m about to set his nickname as that

12:46 From: Okaasan/Eita Why don’t you take your own advice and stfu salami

12:46 From: Captain-Sama S C R E A M I N G

Okaasan/Eita has changed “Guess Monster (▼へ▼メ)” ‘s nickname to, “the most tender Salami”.

12:46 From: s u f f e r i n g (。□° ) I can’t breathe

12:47 From: Ushiwaka-sama Lol

True to your word, you were laughing with almost no control while Semi was trying not to have his smile break his stern façade. You covered your mouth to stifle the giggles and the fact that the literal volleyball idiot wrote “Lol” you had no doubt he was laughing as well a few classrooms over.

Those in your immediate vicinity subtly turned to look at you and you had to pretend to bend-down to pick up a pencil to hide your laughter. You thanked Semi for the umpteenth time for grabbing these seats in the back that were far from the teacher’s reproach.

Once you were settled, Semi commented, “The aim of my remark was to calm you all down.”

It was hard to focus in class usually, but after a morning like that you were done. English was your forte and you had no problems with the subject, even in an advanced class focused on the western world’s literature. The Great Gatsby was your shit.

13:34 From: Captain-Sama I have detention now Eita. I hope youre happy

13:34 From: Okaasan/Eita What did I do????

13:34 From: Captain-Sama I literally started screaming at the name

13:34 the most tender Salami At least someone else is suffering too

13:34 the most tender Salami My ass is getting blasted on the shared gc help

13:35 From: s u f f e r i n g (。□° ) Hey remember that time you locked me in the men’s locker room

13:35 From: s u f f e r i n g (。□° ) Karma beyotch

13:35 From: the most tender Salami LMAo thanks for that reminder ugh that was the funniest day I almost feel better

You frowned at your phone and Semi noticed your reaction, “That’s your fault. You brought it up.”

The two of you were done with class for the rest of the day and were casually lounging around his dorm room. His roommate, Reon Ōhira, was in class 4 and had a different schedule from the two of you.

You were laid-out across his bed, backpack carelessly thrown on the floor against his desk. Semi was previously occupied with whatever he does on his laptop, but now he was catching-up with the groupchat. This was incredibly normal and it was almost second-nature for you to lounge in his room. Your roommate, the captain of the women’s team, often noted this with certain intentions.

It was no secret that you and Semi were something.

You flirted nonchalantly and he had an overall friendly personality — it seemed entirely natural. Your relationship had blurred lines and no clear mutual understanding. The two of you could hold hands and he could get away with the occasional kiss on your cheek. And if anyone asked if you were in a relationship, you would say no. Semi would do the same.

There was one occasion during your second-year that pushed Semi’s buttons to the point where he made your relationship known. You could count the amount of female third-years on your hand and still have fingers to spare. This, in Tendou’s eyes, left barely any possible suitors that he would seriously be interested in. And of all people, the eyes of the guess monster settled on you.

Tendou was a somewhat of a Kuudere, in your words. He was not cold, but incredibly blunt and cared on the inside. He had the type of attitude that would not seem to care if their crush noticed them. Instead, he took it a step further, to compliment said crush to other people and claim not to like them. And because he was so damn loud and incredibly obvious, the other male volleyball players seemed to notice and their gazes would casually linger on you.

You would dismiss their sudden interest as only aesthetic-deep and not take any other crushes seriously, especially Tendou. His crush bounced from girl to girl and this was a well-known fact, simply because he could admire a good looking person and not get emotionally attached. However, this was easier when the girl was in his class and not as immediate as on the volleyball team.

Tendou would highlight the specific beauty of your smile or hair casually and the other third-years would calmly agree. Semi could see it all. He was in a private groupchat with those boys and you were the topic of their conversation more than once. He would see the friendly pat on the head from Reon as he complimented your cross-spike. Or how you would converse with Ushijima and his eyes would loiter even after you walked away. Or how you would smile brightly at Yunohama’s jokes.

Tendou and Ushijima’s shared dorm was secretly party central, the later surprisingly okay with socializing on a daily basis. But you normally hung-out with Semi, in his room. And recently you had been getting more and more invitations to their room. He was hella annoyed and would often drag you right after class to chill with him instead.

This did not change the fact that Tendou was aggressive and this led to the day of Semi’s snapping. Tendou was waiting outside of your classroom and once he spotted you, he stepped right between you and Semi to sling a lazy arm across your shoulders.

“Finally we are graced with Friday. No homework to worry about for tomorrow and even better, it’s a rest day for volleyball!” Tendou was narrating the day as the three of you walked, Semi pushed all the way to the side. “Shall we let go of our inhibitions to celebrate this rare occasion?”

You lightly attempted to push off his hold on you, but he did not budge. “Sorry Tendou, not exactly in the mood to go off campus tonight.”

“That’s perfectly alright with me,” He deflected the rejection, “Waka is leaving tomorrow morning so we can chill in the dorm.” Certain ideas were undoubtedly forming in the minds of two growing teenage boys and Semi did not hide his disapproval. Instead, he sighed loudly and had the urge to grab you right out of Tendou’s grasp.

“What do you plan on doing with just me tonight, Tendou?” You teased.

He only laughed and ignored your question, “So how about it?"

“I prefer to get my homework done before the weekend, so that’s what I’ll be preoccupied with tonight.” You answered and Semi smirked at your response.

He bristled at your retort and kept pushing, “Well. I know you like that cheesecake place downtown—”

“Can’t you take a hint, Tendou?” Semi asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Sorry, but once I lay my eyes on a beautiful girl there’s no way I’ll let her go.” Tendou affirmed and tightened his hold on your shoulders.

You blushed at his confidence, “Ha. Well, determination is a dangerous thing.” Semi noted your flushed appearance and the fact that you had not pulled away from his hold.

No way, not on his watch.

Your flustered looks and affectionate embraces were meant for him and him alone.

Was Tendou’s unwavering resolve really getting to you? The red-head would constantly shower you with compliments and it was only a matter of time that it would infiltrate your brain. Meanwhile, he would offer you vague responses and a sparse amount of sentiments.

With his mind made-up, Semi grabbed you right out of Tendou’s filthy arms and into his own. “Sorry. But she’ll be busy with me.” You were nestled underneath his neck and his arm was wrapped lightly around your waist.

The message he was sending was clear and if it was not, Semi sure as hell would be ready to provide more.

Instead of being heart-broken or defensive, Tendou immediately turned the situation around, “Busy doing what?” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

“Staying the hell away from you.” Semi sassily replied and attempted to walk away with you in his grasp.

Tendou took the message in stride and went further to ship the two of you together for the rest of the schoolyear. The others must have received the message and they laid off from their previous flirting. Well, most of them. The only person unaffected by Semi’s wrath was the great volleyball idiot himself. But it was generally understood that he never really knew the implications of his actions.

Since then, there was no real progression in your public and private relationship with Semi. You hit every milestone with stride: prolonged hugs, kisses on the cheek, and even a sleepover when your roommate was away with her boyfriend. You were happy with how things were now and you feared if you talked about it, it would end. With no real reason to address the subject, the two of you continued with your relationship. He was there when you were sad and you surely did the same for him.

The second-year of high-school was your turning point. Your first-year friendship could be described as average, simply two members of the same game. Classmates and admirers of volleyball, you were cordial for ordinary reasons. After your injury, it was hard to personally connect with anyone.

But Semi could do what the others could not. Your second-year came with the introduction of Kenjirō Shirabu. He was a salty little douche and before the Spring High Tournament he was the official setter for the men’s volleyball team. The teammates that Semi had fostered and grown with since middle school were suddenly dragged away from him. And there was nothing he could do. His best was suddenly not good enough and he fell short to a first-year.

You connected on a level that the others could not understand. Being cut from a team was like being abandoned, but it was no one’s fault but your own. And that fact hurt more than anything. Try as you might, there was nothing either of you could really do to regain your prominence.

You found comfort in one another and it was highly noted by the other team members.

“What’s with the face?” Semi asked, noting your saddened facial expressions.

You paused and then sat-up, “We’re graduating this year.”

“Just because we’re leaving this school, doesn’t mean we’ll stop being friends.” Semi comforted. Friends… That word would continue to haunt you. You were friends, incredibly close with few secrets between the two of you. Your relationship was once in a lifetime and soon there would be more than emotional barriers separating you two.

It was not until the autumn formal that you recognized first-hand the complications of desire.

Someone asked Semi to the formal. And it had not been you. But he still said yes.

You heard this secondhand from Reon, a week after the girl had initially asked. Did he hesitate? Did he even think of you? Did he… have feelings for the girl?

She was someone unrecognizable from Ushijima’s class and you had spotted her after having lunch with just the ace. Social Media was a big thing and of course Shiratorizawa Academy had a team-spirit page that highlighted all sorts of shit. And of course, there were the posts about who was going with who to the formal. ((promposals cough))

You were unsure if you had ever seen her before. But after noticing her, you seemed to see her everywhere. She was beautiful in every way you were not – incredibly feminine and keeping up with her appearance. Flowing blonde hair that went past her elbows and she seemed to always sport a dress. Semi was not distant in any way and it seemed like he was never going to bring it up with you unless you took the initiative.

You asked once or twice about the girl and he waved off that she was very pretty and very determined. She seemed to exceedingly fancy him and would not take no for an answer. And he had no real reason to say no. No real reason. Your heart ached at his simple words. If you were no “real reason,” then you sure were not going to continue this way.

There was a month until the formal and that meant an entire month with having this loom over your head. Semi never indicated he wanted more than friendship and it seemed that was not enough for him. So you pulled away. This was hard since you sat together, but it was definitely different than usual.

You would brush off his invitations to hang-out, which was increasingly hard since you literally spent every waking day together. It hurt you, but it was a good wake-up call. If he did not think more of you, then it was about time you lessened this heavy dependence you had on him. It was an eventual problem that he would find a significant other, but now it was finally before you. You were no masochist and distanced yourself from the constant sorrow. On one occasion, you replied, “Why don’t you hang-out with your date instead?” It was petty and low, but true. You were being replaced. Why would he hang-out with you if he’s got another female on his line?

You addressed this with Reon, but he defended Semi saying that the two were only friends. Semi agreed on a whim, with no real intention of dating the girl or progressing as far as he had with you. But you denied this and stopped talking about it with the two altogether.

You were gleaning out the window, ignoring your lunch and sitting with the guess monster and his ace. “Stop frowning, (F/N)-chan. If it bothers you that much just talk to him.”

“Why should I even bother? He already made up his mind.” You pushed your already minute lunch away.

“Wow, giving up already?” Tendou mocked.

“It’s been three years. If he wanted to do something he would have.”

“You’re wrong, (F/N)-chan.” Salami countered, “Semi has already done something. He told me off, that’s for sure.”

“That was so long ago.”

“What have you done?” Ushijima interjected.

“I’ve never accepted any other man’s affection - not dates, chocolates, late-night talks.” You outwardly groaned and nearly slammed your head on the desk, “I’m about to graduate high-school and I’ve never been kissed.”

Even Tendou laughed at this fact, “Wow, (F/N)! I’d be willing to volunteer.”

You lifted your head to glare at him, “That is unnecessary.” Ushijima stated. “You have proven a great loyalty, it seems.”

“Great.” You mocked, voice dripping with sarcasm, “And this worked out so well for me.”

“It is a rare quality, one that I surely admire you for having.” You sat-up completely, back straight from surprise and eyes glued to the auburn-haired ace that continued eating like his words meant nothing. Even Tendou paused from his causal demeanor to narrow his eyes at Ushijima.

A grin reappeared on his face, one that surely spelt trouble, and he proposed, “Why don’t you two go to the formal together?”

You both paused and shared momentary eye-contact. His eyes appeared mostly impassive, but you had spent enough time with him to notice his questioning gaze. His left eyebrow was slightly upturned and you tilted your head in question.

“I cannot see an immediate reason not to.”

“Me neither."

“Then it’s settled!” Tendou got up to stand by the middle of the table, flippantly placing his hands on both of your shoulders, “Let’s send a post to the Shiratorizawa page so it’s official. Ah so cute, Waka and (F/N) at the dance together!”

Ushijima commented that was extremely superfluous, why should anyone care/know? You reasoned the same way, but Tendou claimed that it was not official until it was on the social media page. You both shrugged and prepared to pose for a picture over lunch.

“No, no. This looks totally lame.” He ended up dragging the both of you outside, in the middle of the quad during common hour. Tons of students were walking by and watched as Tendou modeled the two of you.

He settled on putting Ushijima’s hand on your waist and angled your front facing the ace. Your head was turned back towards the camera and you had a hand on his chest. This position was entirely intimate and even the dense Ushijima commented this, but Tendou waved it off. You wondered what crazy things Tendou could get his roommate to do.

Tendou was having a blast, taking multiple pictures from different angles on his phone. You wondered: how good could it possibly look? You were sporting your Shiratorizawa uniform and Ushijima was in his usual track-suit. You could hear the whispering and it seemed that posting the picture would be redundant, almost everyone saw the two of you posing like this!

The three of you returned back to your lunch table and upon sitting down, you received a brand new notification.

[Instabook] Slide to unlock and see new tagged post

Looks like the two most elusive volleyball bachelor/ette’s have snagged each other! Be sure to check-out this cute couple at the fall formal! Tagged: Ushijima Wakatoshi and (F/N)(L/N)

Attached: 1.jpg, 2.jpg, 3.jpg, 4.jpg

“Was it really necessary to send in all those pictures, Tendou?” You asked.

“They tell us to send multiple and they’ll pick the best one! Whoever the account owner is, they are the ones who decided on showing all of those!”

“But four?”

“I sent in ten. And four is the max they can post, so they must really like you guys.” Tendou teased. Almost instantly, you were getting more and more notifications.

People you had never met before were liking the post and it was embarrassing at how much attention this was garnering! You weren’t even dating! Your phone was constantly vibrating from Instabook and you muted the app entirely – you’d return to it later at the end of the day. Sadly, the volleyball team was quick to react too.

GC: Caw Caw SHIRATORIZAWA ୧༼✿ ͡◕ д ◕͡ ༽୨

14:57 From: Captain-Sama! um wtf is this Attached: THEpost.jpg, receipts.jpg, wtf.jpg

14:57 From: Not-my-libero-Yamagata ( ´ ▽ ` ) Not the otp but I still ship it

14:57 From: Coconut-head Senpai’s gf is so cute (๑꒪▿꒪)*

14:57 From: the most tender Salami You can thank me

14:57 From: Captain-Sama! y tf would I do that

14:57 From: the most tender Salami I got the ship sailing

14:57 From: the most tender Salami And got usiwaka to ask (f/n)-chan

14:58 From: Kawanishi ✩꒳✩ And u stil cant get urself a date??

14:58 From: the most tender Salami I’m going to ignore that and show off this CUTE COUPLE Attached: lunchdate.jpg, imthechaperone.jpg

Tendou was showcasing photos he literally took then and there, of you and Ushijima conversing over lunch. It could be viewed entirely as innocent, but after the previous posts it seemed to imply something. Tendou noticed that Semi had seen the chat already, but had yet to respond.

14:58 From: Captain-sama! Are they dating???????????????

14:59 From: the most tender Salami Nah, but theyre too busy to respond to the chat ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

14:59 From: Kawanishi ✩꒳✩ OH SHIT

14:59 From: Not-my-libero-Yamagata ( ´ ▽ ` ) WE’RE NOT OLD ENOUGH ( ಠ - ಠ )

15:00 From: Captain-Sama! I WANT PICS

Reon and Semi were discussing the subject in the comfort of their private dorm. It was clear to the tan boy that you were bothered by Semi agreeing to go to the formal and not even telling you! It was only now that Semi was understanding this and he looked to his roommate for guidance.

“I already told that girl I’ll go with her…” Semi was attempting to sort his thoughts, “But I don’t want to hurt (F/N).”

“You don’t have to worry about that,” Reon interjected, “You already did that.”

Semi burrowed his head into his hands, “Does (F/N) think I’m replacing her? She means so much to me, that’s absurd.”

“You didn’t exactly tell her that you were going to formal with someone else.” Reon explained, “How would you feel if your closest friend was going to an intimate dance with a date that you never met before?” Semi massaged his temples further, feeling the oncoming migraine that usually came associated with a certain second-year setter.

His thoughts were unclear and the constant vibrating of both their phones were not helping his mental state, “What is happening?”

Reon browsed through his phone first and frowned, “Well. It seems a certain someone’s affection never fully disappeared from last year.”

Semi narrowed his eyes and picked up his phone to see your face splayed across the screen. A smile graced your face and it was clear who was the cause behind it. Ushijima’s smile was rare and came at random moments, but it was encased in memory through the photograph. He almost screamed.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Semi threw his phone on the bed before collapsing face first into it.

“On the chat, it seems Tendou was the one who pushed them together.” Semi punched his pillow at the mention of the brash Salami. “And they’re not dating, just going to the dance together.”

Semi let out a string of incomprehensible words into his comforter. “This is Ushiwaka. He’s not like Tendou, with the endless list of crushes. He’s genuine all the time and complimented (F/N) without hesitation. As in, I’m fucked.”

Reon was inwardly rolling his eyes, it was only when Semi was entirely comfortable with the other person or very enraged that he let loose his short-tempered side. And it seemed Semi was both, right at this moment.

You broke off from Tendou and Ushijima to retreat back to your dorm room. Ushijima agreed to have dinner with you later, in hopes of coordinating your outfit for the formal. It seemed the post of the two of you was the most popular on the entire page and you would have to dress to impress the audience.

Upon entering, you were ambushed with questions from both your roommate, Reon, and strangely Shirabu.

“(F/N), what the fuck.”

“You better not hinder his abilities as ace!”

“Did you just come from lunch with him?”

You blinked at the assault and then sat-down. “One, we’re not dating. So I will not be a distraction for him, I assure you. This is mostly Tendou’s doing anyway.”

Shirabu nodded at the explanation and then walked towards the door, stopping to put a hand on your shoulder first, “Good enough. Have a good time then.” And with that he walked out of the room. Shirabu was a special type of kid, everyone knew. At least he had the best intentions at heart?

“Seriously?” Your roommate and captain of the female volleyball team asked, showing off her impeccable vernacular.

“Come on.” You threw your bag to the side of your bed.

“How did this even start?” She sat down on her own bed as Reon rested on your desk chair.

“I was talking about y’know, what’s been bothering me recently. And Tendou suggested that there was no real reason to stop Ushijima and me from going to the formal together.”

“And what? Ushijima just asked on the spot after that?” She asked.

“Yeah, pretty much. And then Tendou made a big spectacle of it by making us pose for a picture.”

“A top three ace in the entire country and 190 centimeter of pure man, and you are the one to have tamed him. Holy shit, good job.” She commended.

Your eyes nearly fell out of your head and Reon could not stop his sudden coughing fit. “We are not dating.”

“Just the pure fact that Ushijima had no reason to not ask you, wow.” She commented. “If it was any other girl he would have scroll of reasons that would hit the floor with a speech to go along with it.”

“There’s no way.” You countered.

“Do you honestly think there are no implications?” Reon asked.

“Yeah, if anything he’s doing it as a favor.” You answered offhandedly, realizing your mistake instantly. It was natural to speak candidly to the two. However, it was clear that Reon would die defending Semi and thus you stopped speaking to him previously about the situation.

“A favor?” He asked, just as you had thought.

You hesitated. It was not in you to lie and it was only a matter of time before Tendou gave further details to the rest about the situation. “We were talking about Eita-kun before he asked me.”

“What about Eita?”

“Just how really messed up this situation is.” You decided on being vague.

Reon did not take the hint and continued to push the subject, “Why is it messed up?”

“You know why,” You gave him that look, like really bro, “I guess that’s what I get for assuming.

“What did you assume?” Your roommate asked, this time.

“I stayed loyal to him and I never gave into anyone. Never accepted chocolates or dates or anything. And I just assumed he would do the same?” Reon sat back in the chair, obviously mauling over your words.

“Well that is mostly true, with the exception of one person.” Both you and your roommate shot him questioning looks, unsure where he heard that from. “Isn’t it true you did extra practice with Wakatoshi for a whole month?”

“I don’t think volleyball counts as accepting affection.” Your roommate countered.

“Do you see who we are talking about?” Reon explained, “Our beloved ace lives and breathes volleyball. And he shared a good amount of that time alone with you. If you wanted to practice so badly, why not with Eita? He was the official setter.”

“Because Ushijima asked me personally.”

“And you accepted. You voluntarily spent an extended amount of time with him, engaging in the sport he loves and you didn’t think anything of it?”

“Of course not! I would have accepted practice from anyone else on the team.”

“I think that’s where you do not understand.” Reon paused, attempting to fully devlop his next few words before conveying them to the two of you. “You’re treating this extremely casually. But these are all boys who had no problems with showering you with compliments last year. Take a step back and really think about the situation.”

Your roommate interjected, “Okay, hold on. So Tendou and the boys tried to carelessly compliment (F/N) and after that she accepted one of those boy’s request to spend time with him.”

“We are not talking about some irresponsible boy. This is Wakatoshi, the most serious and straight-forward idiot to exist.”

You were sat on the bed, hands currently encasing your head in obvious stress and over-thinking. “But that’s not how I saw it! Ohmyfuckinggod.”

“I suggest you amend the situation, (F/N)-chan.” Reon advised, “I left him alone in the dorm, please talk to him.”

But you were already out the door. You had a growing list of reasons why you were an idiot and this misunderstanding definitely topped the list. You had to tell Eita that Ushijima would never hold a place in your heart like he did. It was impossible for Ushijima to have feelings for you, that was definite. Ever since your unofficial parting from Eita, you had spending more time with the ace. However, you would often be expressing your sadness about Semi and he knew entirely about your feelings. Wakatoshi was a bro.

And it was important that Semi knew that.

You tapped on his door, rapid and loud enough that you were sure other people in the hall heard it. There was a light shuffling inside and it seemed like there were multiple voices.

Semi opened a slight crack of the door with narrowed eyes, but when they landed on you they widened with obvious shock. “(F/N), what are you doing here?”

“I think there’s been a misunderstanding. I was talking with Reon and I think I need to say something before I regret it. Can I come inside?” Semi scratched the back of his ear in thought and did not move to allow you in.

“Who’s at the door, Eita-kun?” And right before your eyes was the blonde date he agreed to go to the formal with.

Semi could literally see and feel your heartbreak. When your eyes traveled from her smiley disposition to him, he saw the narrowing – the pure anguish written across your face. It was something he never wanted to see ever again. The poor boy would do anything for you and it physically pained him that the cause of your sorrow was from him.

You swallowed your pride and yelled out, “I’m sorry for interrupting!” You ran down the hall, not caring that the door to Tendou and Waka’s room opened as you sprinted past it.

“Did you hurt her?” Wakatoshi asked a stunned Semi, who was standing in the middle of the hallway with a hand outstretched.

“I hate my fucking life.” Semi slapped a palm to his forehead. He had something to do first before he addressed you. He slammed the door behind him quickly, so neither volleyball players could throw questions at him.

“What was that?” The blonde girl asked, still standing and silently waiting for Semi. He had called her here a few minutes ago, saying that they needed to talk.

“We can’t go to the formal together.” Semi stated. “I’m really sorry if I’ve led you on.”

“Is it because of (L/N)-san?” She asked, smile still evident on her face. He nodded lightly. “You two honestly suit each other. Even I was surprised when you said yes to me.” She moved to the floor to grab her bag and leave, “May I ask, why did you agree to go with me?”

“I don’t know.” He sat on his bed and wanted to scream, it was rare for him to be so confused.

“You better get your shit together, Eita-kun.” She gave a small laugh and then exited the dorm.

There was no way that you were returning back to your dorm. You knew that your roommate and Reon would still be there and expecting details. You should have known! If you kept distancing yourself from Semi, it was only a matter of time that he found comfort in another person’s arms. You deserved this, really. You had been so petty and jealous without actually affirming your feelings to him.

Text Messages:

17:32 From: the most tender Salami What was THAT?!

17:29 From: Ushiwaka-sama! Where are you???

The only place that you knew would be free of any volleyball idiots would be the on-campus café outside of the nursing building. It only accepted money and not swipes from the meal-plan, which in itself was a turn-off from most of the volleyball teams. It was on the complete opposite side of campus from the gyms and you were sure that none of the people you knew were enrolled in medical-specific programs. Of course, everyone except from her.

It had been a full hour of dodged texts and missed calls when she neared your table. “Hi. You probably don’t want to talk to me of all people.” The blonde started, but still made a motion as if asking if she could take the empty seat across from you.

“You can have the seat. I was on my way out.” You grabbed your various things from the table, readying to leave.

“Wait, please just listen.” You paused in your movements and nodded, “Semi called me to his room to call off our date for the formal. He never meant to upset you and I’m sure he’s looking for you as we speak. Please give him a chance.”

“You don’t have to do this.” You interjected, “He said yes to you and I don’t want to take him away from you just because I am the one who is upset. You asked and he accepted your affection, something we never did. We’ve only ever been friends. With Semi, all I want for him is to be happy. He deserves all the happiness in the world, even if it’s not with me.”

Your eyes were wandering around during your speech, jumping from behind the blonde and your surroundings but never focusing on her. When you gazed back at her, she was holding a hand to her nose and lightly sniffling.

“You two deserve to be together!” She shouted, “Oh god I am so sorry for getting between you guys.”

Behind you, Semi was scouring the café in an attempt to find you. He spent too damn long thinking and not acting, it was finally time that he made his feelings known. Grabbing his phone on the way out, he called Tendou and Waka and neither boys knew where you were. A quick text to Reon and your roommate and they both asked why you were not with him. Semi sighed and continued in his search. Finally, he received a text from the blonde that she found you moping around here.

Semi could spot you in a crowd of rowdy volleyball players within seconds. He found your luscious locks of hair across the very person he left. Damn, he really owed that girl. She took rejection like pro and even took it a step further to keep you here until he arrived.

“Please, you have nothing to be sorry about.” You responded.

A pair of large hands slid to lightly weigh on your shoulders, “Can I interrupt?”

“Please do.” The blonde replied and quickly gathered her belongings. “I wish you two the best.”

Semi quickly took her seat and reached across the table to hold your hands in his. “You said you wanted to clear misunderstandings before you ran off. I need to do the same.”

His grip tightened and you squeezed back. “Let me start, since I owe you an explanation.” He nodded. “Eita-kun, you’re the only man I’ve ever had eyes for. Even if I spend time with Waka-kun or Salami, they’ve never meant more to me than just friends. You’ve always held the most special and largest piece of my heart.”

Semi smiled and moved his chair closer to yours. “I want you to know that I feel the same way. It’s rather small of me, but after you spent so much time with Wakatoshi… I wanted to test if you felt the same heartbreak I felt when I saw the two of you together. I realize now how spiteful that was of me, to the very girl I had feelings for.”

You placed a gentle hand on the side of his face, rubbing rather affectionately and he seemed to lean into it. “Looks like we’re a pair of idiots.”

“But now you’re my exclusive idiot.” He staked his claim and you wondered how his seat suddenly was right next to yours!

Semi nuzzled your nose with his own, smile enrapturing you for the oomph time. You closed your eyes and leaned forward, bumping noses until you felt the gentle touch of his lips against yours. You were entirely receptive, even moving further into his body to get the full scape of his silky lips. The tips of his hair were tickling the sides of your face. And you would kill to feel this sensation for the rest of your life.

His hands lost themselves in your hair, preoccupied with keeping a steady hold on the back of your head. You returned the embrace and he took that as an invitation to glide his lips against yours, silently asking for entrance. You moaned in answer and opened up slowly, but he took it entirely in stride – not skipping a beat.

It was only when a flash went off that the two of you broke apart, gasping for air.

“Holy shit!” Tendou yelled, Wakatoshi clapping not too far behind him. You flushed with embarrassment. God you moaned in public! “This one is for the page.”

You were about to interject when Semi stated, “Finally. Maybe now you bastards will get the message.”

New notification:

[Instabook] Slide to unlock and see new tagged post

Hot momma! Finally, it seems as though the couple everyone shipped together are finally official~ Hopefully we don’t have to mark this page as 18+ Tagged: Eita Semi and (F/N)(L/N) Attached: 1.jpg, 2.jpg / 3.gif

Semi led you back to his empty dorm, your roommate and Reon were bro’s and willingly offered to have a sleepover to give you two alone time. You were currently encased between his arms, legs tangled and speaking in low voices. He had you nestled beneath his chin, but most of your weight laid across his chest. Semi did not want this moment to end. He waited three years for this, it was a moment of love in the making. You laughed lightly in his arms, not a care in the world keeping you from him. You were both on cloud nine, basking in each other's presence. You never took Semi as a closet cuddle-whore, but you were not complaining. His arms encased you perfectly and you could not hold back from placing butterfly kisses across his chest. You loved him, it was only a matter of time that you found out.

—xXxXxXxXxXx—

➳ A/N: This fic may seem familiar because it’s being brought up over from our earlier Deviantart account! <3

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lululawrence · 3 years

Note

hiiii i was the mpreg!harry anon and i was wondering if you have super super super angsty recs and maybe harry having a lot of complications during birth or something?!! or even full out passing away or anything like that tbh

okay darling, i’m quite afraid that i’m going to disappoint with this rec lolllll i’ll be upfront and say that i have to stay away from most fics that have complications during pregnancy or during birth because of my own triggers and real life experiences, so the recs i have don’t feature that. i also defo cannot handle MCD, so i’m sorry!

now when it comes to super angsty mpreg? that i can try to help with. lol you prefer mpreg harry, so i’ll try to focus on that in here, but tbh the first angsty mpreg fics i thought of were mpreg louis fics.i might add one or two of those still, but the rest will be harry, promise. i also hope these are angsty enough for your liking, even without the birth complications and mcd haha here we go!

There Goes My Life by @mizzhydes / MsHydeStylinson - okay, i know i know, this is not what comes to mind when i think of angsty, okay? BUT it is mpreg harry AND there is the underlying fear of miscarriage along with an unplanned c-section so! because of that i’m still reccing it here. plus i fucking loved this fic, so. yeah. lol

I Think You're Already Home by @jaerie / jaerie - again, this one isn’t crazy angsty, at least not to do with the pregnancy. there’s plenty of angst and pining and hella smut, but there’s a surprise home-birth of sorts, loads of anxiety, the fact that harry is only a surrogate and going to have to give up the baby, etc etc etc so while the pregnancy itself isn’t angsty, there’s still a lot of angst and a lot of feelings that are in there that surround the whole thing, so 100% rec this one, i love it and i’m not just saying that cause jenna gifted it to me lol

Everything I need I get from you by @jaerie - okay, so in this one once again it’s mpreg harry and harry’s in a relationship with a neglectful dickhead. because of harry overworking himself and not having access to music, which in this a/b/o world contributes to people’s health, it means that harry’s not really in good health and he is incredibly concerned about his baby. so there’s the angst surrounding the situation harry is in and his health plus what to do about louis who is trying to help him, etc etc etc. it isn’t super angsty, but hot damn is it good.

Tightrope by @sadaveniren / SadaVeniren - so this is mpreg louis, but there are complications with the pregnancy! haha and a decent amount of angst surrounding it because of that. basically harry and louis are both full on dumbasses who had a fwb type situation when neither of them were dating someone, and louis accidentally gets pregnant off of it lollll it’s FAB and i love!

Sisterwives by @jaerie - what can i say? jenna delivers on the angsty pregnancy shit lmao omega harry, omega louis, they’re sisterwives who are like... enemies to fragile friends to lovers, but they have to hide it from their alpha. there’s forced pregnancy, a pretty decent lack of medical care, they’re basically in a cult with like no money... there’s a lot of angst from outside situations while also discovering themselves and it’s a lot and i love it.

Say Something by @kingsofeverything - okay so i haven’t read this yet but i am SO excited to do so when i have a moment lol that said, lauren said she didn’t think it was that angsty, but she apparently doesn’t have a good gauge of that and the situation does seem like it could be angsty so i’ll throw it out there lmao harry’s 50 and a widower, louis is 28 (heh), they’re matched up by a heat/rut service, and harry accidentally get’s pregnant! WHOOPS

Falling For Me Won't Be A Mistake by @all-these-larrythings / Rearviewdreamer - this one i read awhile ago and i don’t remember the actual level of angst but i do remember crying a lot because i’d just had a baby and everything harry was going through just hit me so hard lollll so yeah anyway mpreg harry who is a doctor and as we all know, doctors are the worst patients, right? lol so he doesn’t really take care of himself the way he should and meanwhile louis just... can’t be found and he’s just... it’s so good. and the pain is good too. again, i don’t remember if the angst is high or if the angst has to do with the pregnancy physically, i don’t think it does outside of harry working himself too hard perhaps, but yeah. this was one of the first mpreg fics i ever read and it is STILL one of my favs.

I'm In Trouble Deep by Allthelivelonglarry, sammie4jones, Scrufflecake, and OrphanAccount - okay listen if you want angst, this is one hell of a ride haha! once again, i don’t remember the pregnancy itself being the angsty part, outside of everything harry has to deal with regarding it... it’s just all a lot. there’s so much harry is working through in so many ways and please read the tags first just to be sure you’re good haha but considering what you asked for, i’m guessing you are. ANYWAY. pain? check. mpreg harry? check. have at it, dear! haha

okay and that’s all i think i’ve got for you, i sure hope something here is new and fits the bill! i do fear that i am not able to actually give you the level of angst you’re wanting, but i did my best. happy reading!!

#my fic rec #fic rec #mpreg rec #Anonymous #asks #mine

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skateboarding-poet · 3 years

Note

For the character ask request, hope you don't mind me sending a few over from A3... but: Taichi Nanao, Homare Arisugawa, Sakuya Sakuma, and Kazunari Miyoshi 🌸

Oooh y'all love Sakuya so muchhhh okay I'll do all of them

Also tagging @emilycollins00 so you can see this

Lmao this is gonna be a bit long

Taichi

What I love about them: Taichi's whole vibe is what I aim to have for myself. He'e so cool but at the same time he seems like a person that makes you comfortable just by being near you. He's amazing and I want to be the same

What I hate about them: nothing. There's nothing to hate about Taichi Nanao.

Favorite Moment/Quote: I really enjoy Sakuya and Taichi's event chats, they somehow click so well during those, and they're some of my fave interactions of Taichi with members outside of his troupe

What I would like to see more focus on: Taichi's skating. He is a skater but there's barely any focus on that in canon, so I'd love to see more of itttttttt

What I would like to see less focus on: His association with dogs. Taichi is more than a dog boy and half of the puppy pair k thanks.

Favorite pairing with: SAKUTAITEN, no doubt about it. I just love the dynamic between these three, it's impossible for me to find sth else.

Favorite friendship: the Banri and Taichi duo is underestimated. They have so much chaotic potential. Also I want Taichi and Tasuku as a duo to be more explored

NOTP: om*tai is an absolute no from me. I know there are worse options but this one just... Please no.

Favorite headcanon: Taichi is the resident go-to guy when you want to dye your hair, especially in the middle of the night. It's because he often dyes his hair late at night since he often forgets to do it until right before going to bed. Lmao I love him sm.

Homare

What I love about them: How he is himself so unapologetically. No matter what you say about his "weird" personality or his poetry, he still goes on like nothing happens.

What I hate about them: lmao I feel like anyone who looks forward to what I have to say about anyone for this one will be so disappointed. I have nothing

Favorite Moment/Quote: act 1 episode 4 is a perfect example of how Homare did the most work for the Winter Troupe in the very beginnings. Everyone came around and started contributing just as much, don't get me wrong, but all I'm saying is that at the beginning Homare wanted then to get closer and did his best, even when he didn't succed the first time.

What I would like to see more focus on: idk if this fits here but m a n I need another Homare lead it's been bong enough leebur pls

What I would like to see less focus on: hmm idk

Favorite pairing with: AzuHoma

Favorite friendship: Tenma and Homare are such an entertaining duo and I care them

NOTP: hmm nothing in particular (excluding the obvious adult×child pairings, which applies for everyone)

Favorite headcanon: Homare cuts his own hair bcs he doesn't like anyone touch his hair/face/head. I can't remember where I saw this one but yes so much yes.

Sakuya

What I love about them: His strenght. Sakuya went through so much and is still his happy, cheerful self. He decided to forgive everyone in his life who wronged him and now he is happy with his true family. Just ejfnrirjeidjeos he's so admirable.

What I hate about them: his character writing💖 come on leebur do better

Favorite Moment/Quote: it's part of act 3 2/2 and I don't want to spoil anything so💖

What I would like to see more focus on: HIS STRUGGLES. IT'S OKAY TO OPEN UP DUDE. PLS.

What I would like to see less focus on: his nice and naive side was lowkey turned into an uwu baby thing which I don't really like. He is not a child. In a3 jpn he even is 20 y/o.

Favorite pairing with: sakutaiten lmao would you espect anything else from me at this point

Favorite friendship: so many. So Many. Sakuya and anyone from his troupe. Sakuya and Misumi. Sakuya and Sakyo. Sakuya and Banri. Sakuya and Tsumugi. Sakuya and Homare 😭

NOTP: nothing really.

Favorite headcanon: SAKUYA PLAYS THE UKULELE AND HE HAS A PINK ONE FILLED WITH STICKERS AND IT WAS A GIFT FROM THE SPRING TROUPE AFTER THEY HEARD HE WANTED TO TRY LEARNING FOR A WHILE AND AND AND AND

Kazunari

What I love about them: I relate to his tendecy to be a people pleaser. It's very comforting.

What I hate about them: his mankai memory sprite. He looks like he is about to punch me /j /j /j

Favorite Moment/Quote: the whole Shinobi story event is so amazing. It's a very important part in Kazunari's development and the fact that the Summer Troupe is so strongky tied to it is just heartwarming

What I would like to see more focus on: I'd like to see more of him being like a mature figure for others to get advice from. I feel like with him being so casual and seemingly carefree he might be taken for granted sometimes

What I would like to see less focus on: hmm nothing in particular

Favorite pairing with: MisuKazu

Favorite friendship: hmm the puppy pair is pretty neat, but also Kazunari and Tsumugi. They sure are quite a funny pair lmao

NOTP: nothing in particular

Favorite headcanon: oooooo ambidextrous Kazunari ooooooo

Character ask meme

#ask meme #a3!#a3! act! addict! actors!#taichi nanao #sakuya sakuma #homare arisugawa #kazunari miyoshi

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jamespotterthefirst · 3 years

Note

I’m so grateful to have found your blog! And all the people you connected with (they’re lovely). I’m trusting you and keeping tracks with who you’re responding to, because they’ll turn out equally nice and with good contents, too!

Because some people are just so hostile when it comes to Ethan stans. The main tags are, well, let’s just say those are not my happy place.

Thank you for all your positivity, for @choicesbookclub, for Lilac, for the rants on Snape (Potterhead here), for everything! We’ve never met and probably never will, but yeah I’m so grateful. You have been lovely and I can always see my asks, answered (appreciate the gifs and comebacks lmao).

Have a great, great day Bree! Wishing you the best of things so that you’ll stay here…with the rest of us 🥺♥️

Hi you!

Thank you for this little burst of positivity this morning!

First, please stay out of the main Open Heart tag. That place is a circus. Those creepy, delapidated ones you see in movies where a murded has happened or will happen soon.

Second, I'm so happy you liked the book club and all my other dumb contributions lol. They made my heart happy and I hoped they made yours too! ❤️ As for the Snape hate, you can always count on me for that. Always. 😈

I hope you have a wonderful week, even if it will be a tough one when the series finale is confirmed. Stay strong ❤️

#Keep forever

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itsmattsunshinehere · 4 years

Note

Hello!! I was wondering if you could do a scenario with matsukawa and a shy reader? They get paired up for a project and matsukawa has never spoken to her bc she’s always quiet but as he gets to know her, he finds out she’s actually really funny bc she sends memes and they eventually fall in love 🤧 abit cliche but I’d love it 👉🏼👈🏼

Of course I can! I love Mattsun, so I’m always happy to write something with my sweet angel :)

I didn’t know how to put memes so there aren’t any BUT actually there are some nerdy jokes (wich I adore), like really really bad jokes. I kinda have the feeling Matsukawa only know these lmao, he’s dumb (BUT WE LOVE HIM). I hope it’s okay for you, please don’t hate me.

Thanks for your request, hope you like it! 😘💘

-L

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

A Change of Heart.

Matsukawa Issei x reader

synopsis: Matsukawa has never spoken to you, but something changes after you two being paired together for a school project.

word count: 2.1 K

tags: fluff

~~~

Matsukawa Issei. Of all the possible people, he was the last of your classmates you thought you could be paired with for group project. You don't have any problems with him, you don't find him annoying or anything else, it’s just that sometimes you forget about the presence of some of your classmates, Matsukawa included: you are a shy girl and you almost never talk during lessons; you often get distracted thinking about your own business, it is normal for you to not notice the people you don’t talk to, even more if they tend to be as quite as you.

On his side, even Issei hasn’t noticed you, too busy sleeping a few desks away from you: the night before he went to bed late, staying up until one o'clock only to play computer games with some friends.

Anyway, he's your science project partner and you can't do anything about it, even if you prefer to work alone and organize everything to your liking all by yourself, you'll have to collaborate with him and as you, even the guy agrees that for the sake of your GPA it will be essential to try to get along and cooperate. That's why at the end of the class, before your math teacher arrives, your project partner comes to your desk.

"Good morning Matsukawa-san." You greet him shyly, his height puts you slightly in awe, you’ve never noticed how tall he actually is.

"’Morning Y/N-san, apparently we are project companions." He replies to you yawning a little distracted, without looking too sure on what he’s saying; you get the impression that he would like to have been paired with someone else, probably one of his friends, but you try not to pay too much attention to your thoughts.

"Yes, that's correct." You nod looking at him again with a patient smile on your lips.

"I thought that maybe we could exchange our phone numbers to organize on what to do and when to see each other." The boy still keeps his eyes away from yours not looking at you but rather looking up at two of your classmates who are throwing a ball just a few feet from you. You smile at him once more and take your agenda, ripping off a sheet, and after writing some numbers, you give it to him.

"Here to you, I am almost always free every afternoon after six. How about starting in two days, maybe this Wednesday? Is it okay for you?" you ask him, and after thinking about it for a few minutes, as if he were consulting his own agenda mentally, the boy in front of you nods and after greeting you, he turns back to his desk.

You didn't think there were people quieter than you. Or maybe he thinks you’re boring. But what could you have done to him to make you so annoying? You put aside your bad thoughts and focus on the rest of the lessons, more concerned about your grades than the idea that your partner has of you. Of course, sometimes you tend to have no self-esteem, not trusting you’re decisions, but having never spoken to him, he has no reason to hate you, so you don't worry too much about what he might think of you.

But while you don't care about his thoughts, Issei can't say the same for himself: he's curious about what kind of girl you are, what a hobby you have... Why are you only free after six?? Are you in any club? Would you like to go to college? Are you moving to Tokyo next year as most of your classmates? He'd like to ask you so many questions, you intrigue him in a certain way, and he can't deny that you're a pretty girl. He finds adorable how you carry the pencil on your lips every time you stare at the sky out the window.

The two days pass fast, and from Monday you are almost immediately to Wednesday afternoon in the library, you waiting for him at the table on the corner and he who has to run because, due to Oikawa and his obsession with improving the whole team’s service, he is definitely late. The boy looks out the door of the room and rushes you to a table near the windows, listening to music with headphones in your ears and studying some subject. He joins you, slowing down the pace trying not to make any noise.

"Y/N-san." He calls you whispering, but you don't hear him, which is why he tries to get your attention by touching your arm as he sits by your side and you gasp surprised, causing him to giggle.

"I'm sorry if I scared you." You look at the boy with a gentle smile, moving your hand and telling him that he doesn’t have to worry.

“It's nothing, I was doing chemistry homework for tomorrow, but I can't calculate the reaction and find the name of this binary salt.” You say giving up your homework, changing the page of the book and taking the section assigned to you for your work.

"You know chemists are great solving problems? They have all the solutions." Matsukawa replay with a smile, taking your notebook and looking at what you've written.

"I tried telling a chemistry joke once, but I got no reaction." You watch the boy with a grin as Matsukawa lifts his head up surprised, definitely not expecting a joke from you, but you instead look at him laughing at his expression and Matsukawa gives you a sincere smile chuckling.

Time passes quickly as you organize your project and decide what and how to expose it to your classmates. You divide your work and begin your research together, each one giving his own contribution to the other, to try to make it better and giving a sense to what you are doing. When you look at the phone you realize that it is now seven and a half o'clock in the evening and you inform your project partner, who nods and you two begin to pick up your books. Matsukawa is faster than you, so waits for you at the library entrance.

"Y/N-san, I wanted to ask you a question." He tells you while he’s walking by your side, and you can't help but think about how many centimeters there are between you two. You nod kindly with your head.

"How come you never talk? You're funny." He asks you a little hesitantly, and you think for a second about what to answer. You don't know that either, it's not that you don't have any friends, it’s just that you're not the kind of person who starts a conversation. You have no problem talking to others, you just don't like to take the first step.

"Sorry, maybe I was too rude." Matsukawa says softly, worried that he has maybe offended you in some way, but you shake your head with a smile, trying to make him understand that he didn't do anything wrong.

"No don't worry. I can't give you an answer, I think it's just my character. I'm a very shy girl and I tend to stand all by myself, but I've never had a problem talking to people. Once I know someone, I have no problem opening up." you answer him by giving him yet another smile of the day.

Matsukawa looks at you as you walk past him and reach the school gate: part of him that morning had been convinced that he would be bored with you, he felt like you were a serious person, unable to make jokes or something similar. Yet you have happily surprised him, showing a side of your character that you keep secret and that maybe you only show to your closest friends. He feels a bit special.

You reach the gate and you greet him by according to meet at Friday at the same time and so on the following Monday, ending up meeting on those three days every week throughout the entire month, in the library at six in the afternoon.

It has become a habit for you, as well as exchanging messages, during lessons or in your free time. You start spending more and more time together, on lunch breaks you join Matsukawa with his friends in the school canteen, having fun joking with Hanamaki. Matsukawa feels that something has changed. He understands that he has started looking at you differently, seeing you always beautiful and always happy. He understands it from how he has started to notice details on your face; that little mole on your chin, how you tie your hair when you're focused on some math exercise.

A change in his heart.

He starts to think that yours are no longer just moments where you study, but that they are slowly evolving into something more intimate, much more like dating, where you joke and talk about anything. As you tell him how you would like to travel the world, he tells you about the few places he has visited abroad; while you talk to him about the reading club you're a part of, he tells you about his passion for volleyball and his dream of going to the Nationals tournament with his team. You unravel your secrets to each other, without fear, fully trusting each other.

Until one day, when Iwaizumi seeing him smiling atone of your message suggests him something, a particular idea that remains stuck in his head for days.

"You should ask her out." The ace tells him with conviction and the middle blocker looks at him doubtful, not too convinced that you may be interested in dating him.

"Definitely, you can’t take your eyes off her and you're always distracted. Push your pride aside and make the first move before someone takes her away from you." Hanamaki speaks by sitting on the bench next to him and taking a sip from his water bottle. Matsukawa bursts into laughter, though he can't deny that a certain annoying feeling has awakened in him. Maybe jealousy? Impossible, unless...?

The days pass and the date of the presentation of your project approaches, until you arrive at the last Friday before you have to expose your work in front of the whole class, Iwaizumi's words have not yet disappeared from Issei’s mind, as well as those of Hanamaki. What if someone realizes what a beautiful person you are and asks you out? Maybe he should make a move, or maybe they just told him to annoy him... he walks through the corridors until you reach the library that you have been frequented for just over a month. He sees you sitted in your usual place with the usual headphones in your ears and the usual chemistry notebook under your eyes.

He comes near you, moving the chair next to you and sitting to your right and you as always don't even notice him, too caught up in what you're doing. He touches your arm and as always you gasp, quickly turning towards him, while Matsukawa giggles for your reaction. You tongue out and punch him on his shoulder.

"You know you scare my Issei!" you scold him while once again the boy next to you takes your notebook and looks at what's wrong with your equations, remembering when few minutes before you text him that you couldn't do anything.

"Here you go. You miscalculated." Matsukawa answers by giving you back your notebook.

"Forget hydrogen, you're my number one element!" you smile him while he giggles a bit.

"Oh, it's that time of the day where we tell each other stupid chemistry jokes?" he asks you chuckling and you nod happily.

"Well I hope you love science, because tonight we are going to have a chemical reaction." The boy immediately answers you and you can't hold back a laugh, getting the attention of the last remaining students that like you are study and the librarian, who throws you glances from behind her desk. Embarrassed, you apologize and look over Matsukawa, while the boy has a sip of water.

"How about you ask me out first?" you whisper him, blushing instantly, and the boy almost chokes with water and begins coughing, while you try to help him, this time you're the one giggling for the other’s reaction.

Once calmed down, Matsukawa looks up at you, as red as you. Did you really say that? He tries to think of what to answer quickly, not wanting to waste the opportunity.

"There’s a Cafe where they make delicious pancakes." He proposes you embarrassed and you look at him happy, beginning to pick up your books under Matsukawa's eye.

"It’d be amazing." You stand up slowly, sticking your hand out with a smile. Matsukawa copies your movements and gets up taking his backpack. He squeezes your hand with a wink.

“Let’s go.”

#hq #haiky?!!#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#matsukawa #matsukawa issei #matsukawa x reader #matsukawa issei x reader #haikyuu matsukawa #matsukawa scenario #matsukawa imagine #aoba matsukawa #aoba johsai x reader #aoba johsai #hq matsukawa #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios

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brawn-gp · 3 years

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2020 CREATORS WRAPPED

rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

i was tagged by: @ricclaren, @lawstrong, @lewixco (like ages ago) and @foksmashmydoor [i feel very honored you all are talented af omg]

1. my first ever gifset (nov. 19. 2020): ok so i arrived pretty late at this creations business, but i’m so glad i did... of course i would change many things now that i have a bit more knowledge in photoshop, but at the same time i’m hella proud that this one was my ever gifset. also thank you to the wonderful people who put nice things in the tags, that is 100% the reason i continued creating stuff :’) [shoutout also to this pierre gifset, that was my first f1 gifs and i loved the coloring on those]

2. history of formula one (jan. 2. 2021 - ): i know i know, these started this year but i don’t really care because i’ve spend so much time on them [finding the footage, then making and coloring gifs, then finding the info necessary and summarize a whole year worth of interesting things happening in some lines and also doing the posters for each year]. the history of the sport is something that i’m really invested in, so this has been incredible, and i’ll be happy to give my little contribution to every other history nerd, even if there are a few of us haha

3. 2020 season in review posters (dec. 16. 2020 - ): specially the austrian gp posters... i don’t know, i just feel like i could try a bunch of different stuff in photoshop, and tbh they were also my first go at making posters so i’m also very proud of those. yeah! i’m really excited to try a bunch of other stuff as well :) [and this reminded me that i need to post the hungary gp ones because i have them ready but i haven’t posted them yet for some reason lmao]

4. daniel ricciardo + words that don’t translate (dec. 26. 2020): my secret santa gif to cerian! i actually had an amazing time making them, because i had the chance to experiment with a more wild approach to coloring, and i love languages so it was great to also do the research of those amazing words

5. sebastian vettel for the scuderia ferrari (dec. 13. 2020): look seb is my favorite driver, and ferrari is sadly my team... so this departure was incredibly sad for me, even though i knew that it was seb’s best choice... but man, this gifset was painful to make. it took a lot of patience because i was still pretty new to the whole gifmaking scene, but i really liked the end result so yeah! i’m so glad i took my time to make this

*extra mention to the 2020 video recap i made like a few days ago, i had this idea back in september i think, but i never took the time to make it... so now that i did, it feels like an extra achievement!

i think everyone has already done this, so idk who else to tag, but if you want to give it a go then please use this as a tag, i would love to see your creations <3

#thank you for the tag really #it reminded me that i loved making stuff and therefore better enjoying the sport #tag games #lmao i love that i started making serious stuff in the last two months of the year whoops

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softlass27 · 3 years

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💕Robron Tag Game💕

Thanks for the tag @damnitiloveyou 😘

1.) Indicate your preference (feel free to explain)

2) There are two free questions for you to ask people you are tagging (you can ignore - no pressure). The idea would be that everyone could contribute too, and make it more interesting! Let's see if it will work haha.

3) Tag as many people as you want!

Affair era or Husbands era? Argh that’s so hard – they’re my top two! I think I’ll have to go with husbands era, because I’m a slut for that soft domestic shit. And husbands era is generally my favourite time to write fic for, so there’s that.

Floral shirt or Brown leather jacket? Neither are my favourites but I’ll go with brown leather jacket.

Purple hoodie or Overalls? Overalls 🔥🔥🔥

Wedding 1.0 or Wedding 2.0? Wedding 2.0. While there are a couple of scenes in Wedding 1.0 that I would die for (mainly the scenes that are just Robron without any other characters heh), overall I’m pretty *meh* about it. Call me a massive cynic, but I just remember watching it when it first aired and being like, “You two have... way too many communication issues to be getting married what the fuck”. Rewatching it now, after having seen them go through the inevitable breakup and more healthy reunion, I can enjoy it a bit more, for what it is and what it adds to their overall story. But at the time... yeah, I was CONCERNED lmao.

My other issue is... I mean that episode is mostly just another “Dingle Do”, innit? And that fact that it was a “Dingles only” knees up in the family pub meant that, other than Victoria and Diane, everyone in the room was just there for Aaron. They were there to celebrate Aaron getting married rather than AaronandRobert getting married, which isn’t how a wedding should be, really. Then there was all the nonsense with that sodding welly and “welcoming” Robert to the family (which as we know, counted for fuck all), the whole thing just makes me 🙄🙄🙄

Whereas with Wedding 2.0, the fact that it’s actually a properly planned event means that people other than the Dingles got to attend, and you really get the sense that the whole village are there for both Aaron and Robert equally. It was the right time for them, it looked beautiful, it felt earned, and it was nothing less than our kings deserved.

Liv or Vic? Vic. Anyone who’s perused my blog probably knows my feelings about Liv by now, so there’s no need to get into it lol.

The Sugdens or The Dingles? Sugdens. Again, I imagine anyone who knows me isn’t surprised by this answer. 😂 I love watching the Sugdens (even the ones I dislike), their family dynamic is just so interesting and often very realistic. Not to mention the fact that they’re the original legacy family of the show and deserve to be treated as such. I hate that there’s so few of them left :(

Other than Aaron (who barely counts as a Dingle – especially these days lmao), the only valid Dingles are Cain, Marlon and Charity. And even then, I enjoy those characters more when they’re either alone or with their non-Dingle family eg. Cain with Moira and their kids, Marlon with Billy and Ellis, Charity just... away from the rest of them.

The lodge or Christmas 2017? Love the lodge but it’s gotta be Christmas 2017.

Chrissie White or Rebecca White? Chrissie! The writers 100% killed the wrong sister and I hate them for it.

Reunion 1.0 or Reunion 2.0? REUNION 2.0 IS MY FAVOURITE ROBRON EPISODE OF ALL TIME

Alex or Mike? Aw, Mike. He was sweet (and had a nice accent) and I hope that the next time he went out on the pull, he found himself a nice bloke who wasn’t already pining for his soulmate. Alex was a waste of oxygen.

The Love We Stole or Make You Feel My Love? The Love We Stole. Partially based on my personal musical preference and partially because I think the lyrics just fit Robron perfectly – to the point where I almost can’t believe the song wasn’t written for them. No offence to Adele, but Make You Feel My Love is so generic that it could work for any romantic couple really. And to me, the fact that The Love We Stole was the song to play during Robron’s final scene/montage just cements its status as their song.

Lay-by or Barn? Ohh this is tough... I adore the barn but I’m gonna have to go with the lay-by!

Proposal 1.0 or Proposal 2.0? Proposal 2.0

2016 or 2018? 2018! The reunion 2.0 buildup of January/February was fantastic, and while some of the plot later that year was... lacking (thanks to inferior characters like Liv, Rebecca and Chaddy), Robron being reunited and actually in a happy, healthy relationship was everything. It felt like a reward after all the heartache they’d gone through in previous years. 2018 is also the year of Robron being parents to Seb, the three of them being a proper little family was just *chef’s kiss* (until Rebecca once again ruined things).

As for 2016... other than January/February (which I actually tend to see separately from the rest of the year, in my head those two months are more like an extension of late 2015) and SSW, it’s mostly trash in my eyes. Boyfriends era was... yeah, unless you want this to turn into an essay-like rant, I’ll stop there.

Chas or Diane? Diane all the way. Chas can just 🔪🔪🔪

Boyfriend era or affair era? Ahaha I feel like this answer is obvious after my answer to 2016 vs. 2018, but affair era. A god tier time in Robron’s story.

I shall tag @nooneelsecomesclose17, @luststricken, @dinglemingle, @saras-almanac and whoever else fancies it :)

#wow ok some of my answers got a bit rambly i apologise 😅#tag game

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amaranth · 3 years

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i was tagged by @softxingdae @yeolville @untouchabyeolman @dokyunqsoo and @kaibility ! thank you ♡

tagging @zyx @elyxion @delhyun @ainedreams @subaek @sefuns @ciaozhan @exo-stentialism @yixing-zhang @binminseok @bbyunz (i think for sure y’all have already been tagged hsdjknf sorry if i got you again!)

1. jongdae in 2020: this is probably my favorite set i’ve ever made! it was really tough seeing the treatment jongdae got, and it seemed like we wouldn’t see him again before he enlisted (not that i would blame him). so being able to put together all these moments was a lot of fun! even though our jongdae sightings were few and far between, we still got really lovely meaningful gifts from him. i was super pleased with the coloring + font since i always struggle so much with those things ;;

2. kai mmmh stages: tbh i always wanted to do stage compilations but never could make myself actually sit down and do it. but watching how excited jongin was for his debut made me want to contribute something other than just posting updates! i’m proud of the coloring, quality, and the fact that i posted it even though i was hesitant. he had so many pretty stages, i wish his promotions could have gone on forever

3. jongdae’s birthday series: another thing i had always wanted to do but never actually did until now lmao...i experimented a little with the lyric edits (the person who inspired them had a really good eye for color and i tried to match that) and i thought they ended up looking really pretty + i got to ramble about how much i like jd :3

4. kai behind the scenes + smiles: i loved seeing how happy jongin was! you can tell how hard he was working in all these bts videos and it must have been really tiring but he had his pretty smile the whole time. his solo release is one of the highlights of my year, and i was really proud of myself for actually creating content for it.

5. exo-l revival: the people who put this together really inspired me to actually start posting again so i have to include it and get sappy! before this i had only been comfortable enough to post screenshots or silly text posts for kpop things, since in bandom i was content with my messy mcr edits as that was kind of the ~vibe~..if that makes any sense lmao. i felt like kpop was more polished somehow? i’m a lot more confident now! i still have a long way to go in terms of creating, but without this event i probably wouldn’t have been posting nearly as often as i do now so i’m really happy that i joined. my favorite set was definitely the ‘favorite mv’ week where i got to gif happy jongdae !

+bonus this little moodboard of shots from baekhyun’s concert shooting sketch...i love how it turned out with the colors and the soft feeling! very bare minimum but i’m still v proud. i definitely want to try more things like this in the future :)

#this is so long djkfn omg....#i feel very lucky to have such talented mutuals!! thank you for thinking of me :3 #tagged things

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jokerownsmysoul · 4 years

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a only way to love you - part one

A/N: I need a place to drop my love for hands and tummy, especially Arthur’s ones that are my religion lmao, also I wanted to give my own contribution. This is what came out, two pieces but linked by the same thread. To be honest I’m not very proud of these pieces, I could have done better but that’s okay <33 I don’t know if any of you wanted to be tagged in my stuff so in doubt I don’t tag anyone at all lmao I don't want to bother you sksks I hope you like it.

Summary: Arthur deserves to be loved entirely, but there are parts of his body that have deeper wounds and need a special love treatment. Also you're obsessed with Arthur's hands and put love on them. Hands love treatment: that's it, that's the fic. part two: tummy love treatment

Pairings: Arthur x Reader Content: angst, comfort

Warnings: mention of past trauma, wounds

Word count: 3484

A/N: english is not my first language so I apologize for any typos, I’m still learning.

Arthur was a piece of art to you.

There was nothing about him your mind couldn’t resist. For those who didn’t know him and could only look at him from afar his body looked unhealthy, thin, weak and fragile, yet the only thing you could see when you looked at him was a perfection which only imperfect things can have; the only perfection which really matters. A forgotten, neglected, fragile and consumed perfection, beaten by a life that with Arthur had been hard, much more than he could bear.

It was easy for you to catch yourself looking at him, mesmerized by all the tragic beauty his body was wearing like an invisible blanket built from all the pain he had faced in his life.

Everything that life had inflicted upon him had been absorbed not only by his soul, whose pieces Arthur had always had to carry, but also by his body. Yet you wouldn’t have wanted him any other way than in his extraordinary and rare way which dressed him as a garment made of past and experiences.

You got lost in his tired eyes which for an inexplicable reason they always had inside of them a glow that never went away despite their tiredness and that would sparkle even in the darkness, like a lighthouse in the night which illuminates the coast of the sea. Every time you looked at him, his eyes reminded you of the stars that even after they died keep still shining. And despite all the pain he had to face, whose unforgettable consequences would follow him throughout his life, he had never ceased to have in his eyes the true life sparkling in his emerald green pupils as if it were the reflection of the sunlight at the bottom of a lake. Perhaps in his eyes resided all the life his body didn’t hold and that’s why they were so bright they looked like living crystals.

You got lost in his slender torso where the rib cage glowed through his skin, where you liked to pass your fingers and kiss each rib one by one which reminded you of those roots of trees that pierce the ground and begin to grow on the surface; you yourself got lost in his arms, which were defined by muscles whose curves you clung to every time you made love and which kept you anchored in the sea of pleasure in which you would have liked to get lost, if it weren’t for Arthur who waited for you on the shore every single time.

And most of all, you loved his hands. Hands have always fascinated you, but you swore you were obsessed with Arthur’s. You thought about that every time your eyes were immersed in looking at them and your mind could never wake up from the hypnotic state his hands made you reach, a state you wouldn’t let go until Arthur realized you were watching him, bringing you back to reality; as it happened this night.

You were on the bed and the TV on lit up the room of a ghostly blue light that shone in the bedroom walls and illuminated you two, its volume was so low it seemed a silent companion of your mind that at this time was totally directed towards Arthur and, above all, his hands.

Arthur was laying with his back resting on the mountain of pillows behind both of you, his hands resting on his lap. Although he was focused on watching TV, he noticed with the corner of his eye that your gaze was fixed on watching something he had not been able to decipher and he would’ve sworn you had not even realized it. “Y/N?". A jolt ran through your whole body and your mind awoke from this hypnotic state.

You lifted your head placed on his shoulder to look him in the eyes in a rash move, as if he had just woken you up from a dream in a brusque way. "Arthur?" you repeated imitating him and letting a guilty smile mark your lips. “What… what are you doing? Are you okay?” His circumspect eyes stared at you as he placed his right hand on your face to caress your cheek in a worried gesture; you closed your eyes, purring as soon as his hand touched your skin. “I’m okay, love. Just watching your hands.” You rubbed your cheek in his palm nuzzling into his touch even more. Arthur giggled in a shy expression and stroked your cheek with his thumb.

"My hands? What’s with my hands?" Before he could move his hand away from your face you placed yours over his and moving lightly your lips toward his skin you printed a gentle kiss on the heels of his hand, lingering your lips on his soft skin to breathe in his unmistakable smell.

There was something in his hands you just couldn’t explain. When you looked at them it seemed to you that time had passed faster on his hands than the rest of his body, because they were marked by dark spots and pads that a young man like him rarely have on his own skin.

That’s probably why you liked them so much: in his hands you could read the story of his whole life.

His body had absorbed all the wounds and bruises Arthur had seen grow outside of him and then they were rooted inside of him, into his soul. Every time he got jumped, every wound in his body which had already healed but whose weight had never gone away, every wound in his soul that remained open because too fragile and deep to heal, all the pain and suffering he had endured and all he had lived until this moment, his body had gathered him and had made it converge right there, in his hands.

You really believed that every time the wounds on his body healed, their heavy presence immediately moved on his hands, maybe that’s why they seemed much older than the rest of his body. His hands were the carnal reminder of all the pain Arthur had experienced when he was young and had forgotten, and of all the pain he was aware of but tried to hide.

Arthur had been told since he was a little boy to hide his pain putting on a happy face, that’s why he’d held it back his whole life, and the only way his body had found to get him to vent was to use his pain as a brush to paint his hands and to give them that worn-out and eaten look.

Yet you never wanted to see hands other than his on his body; of him you loved all that he was and all that he had been, it was inevitable that you would love the part of his body which had absorbed the weight his soul bore every day, on which his life had converged and on which you could read the remains his pain had left him.

When you looked at them, you could only see a part of him who deserved attention and care as much as his lips did when you kissed them. Probably they were one of the parts more worthy of love because his hands held back the memory of all the wounds the rest of his fleshy body could heal, no longer carrying the sign. Yet even if they healed and externally were not visible their memory remained there, on the surface of his worn hands.

"They’re so beautiful, Arthur. They’re… they’re just like you." Arthur looked at you frowning in a confused expression. “Like me?” He repeated, his confusion had shifted to the tone of his voice. You smiled shyly and understanding, you were as confused as he was because you couldn’t find the right words to make him understand how precious his hands were. “They deserve to be loved, Arthur.” Just like you, you said silently in your mind and saw Arthur smiling in return as he also thought of these same words, and silently understood what you meant. A mutual conversation was created through your minds thinking in unison and understanding each other by speaking in unspoken words. You took his hands and held them between yours, staring at them as if you wanted to touch them through your eyes. Each of your thumbs was dedicated to caress gently the back of each hand of his.

Not only did his pain emerge from his hands, but everything that was part of him too. The love he felt for you, his fragility, his vulnerability so vivid that sometimes you were even afraid to break them even by touching them with your fingertips. Every time he touched you with those hands all the delicacy and grace Arthur carried inside emerged out of them and seemed to dress his hands with a different fabric than the one that dressed his entire body.

You remained silent for a few minutes watching them, Arthur understood that in your words there were hidden thoughts you still had to say out loud and looked at you curious, awaiting, while you were studying his hands with moved eyes, your body was trembling as if you weren’t prepared enough to look at Arthur’s beauty before your eyes.

“I want to… love them.” You said shortly after continuing to stare at them almost embarrassed to utter this desire aloud, Arthur giggled blushing in return. "You're already loving me, Y/N."

"No, Arthur." You moved your head from both sides with a sharp move and raised your eyes to look him in the eye.

You approached him further enough for your noses touch each others lightly. "Listen," you reluctantly let go off the grip of his hands but shortly after you wrapped his face so faster you didn’t give time to the void left by the absence of his touch you felt on your hands to spread all over your skin, because it had already been nourished by the touch of his cheeks when you wrapped his face with yours. You looked him straight in the eyes intensely, your eyes were piercing and determined. Arthur was surprised to see how heavy was the load your face was carrying as you watched him. "I really want to love on them. I... I want to love on you piece by piece, like the way you deserve to be loved."

You were so overwhelmed by the love you felt for him that sometimes you couldn’t speak without a trembling voice. Arthur had a surprised, confused expression, but not because he thought it was absurd what you were saying, but because even though you were together for a long time by far he was still surprised to see the love you felt for him and how you were able to find new ways to love him and to make him feel loved each day more deeply than the previous one. He would never cease to be overwhelmed by the love you showed him and would never cease to be surprised to be loved by you so much as well, sometimes he was even bewildered that someone could love him with such fervour and strength of soul.

You brought slowly, very slowly, your lips close to him looking into his eyes. The closer you got, the more the desire to feel your lips on his grew within Arthur and reached his gaze turned to yours with anticipation. The expectation of that kiss increased his impatience and was watered when you passionally intertwined his lips with yours in an open-mouth kiss, closing both of your eyes in unison. Shortly after you broke the kiss but you were still so close that your lips still touched one another as you kept speaking, your hands still wrapping his face.

“Let me love you, Arthur. Please?” He smiled softly letting your hands feel his dimples deepen under your touch and you smiled in return, knowing that in his smile he hid a yes not said openly. You took the previous position and with your shaking hands you held his right hand as the open palm facing you.

You traced the lines of the palm with your fingertips as if you were walking the streets created by his skin and traveling them with your every sense. Through your fingertips you felt the grooves and ruts his skin formed, folds of skin in which you wanted to sink and lose yourself inside him.

When you examined with your fingers every line of his palm you slowly brought it to your face and laid a series of kisses along its outline. His skin was soft and smelled of him, your lips were lost between these folds, his cupped hand welcomed your face in a warm wrapper while you kissed his palm with parted lips.

With your lips you followed the sinuous curve at the base of his thumb peppering his skin, gradually reaching the heels of his hand on which you planted slowly small sweet kisses. Shortly after, you laid a kiss right in its center, on the most sensitive part. “You’re tickling me,” he said giggling and you looked up at him worried, noticing he had his eyes still closed and a smile that had highlighted his dimples. “Sorry, love. Should I stop?”

Arthur moved his head from both sides gently. “Oh no, sweetheart. I didn't mean it. I’m actually enjoying it.” You smiled at him knowing relaxing the worried look on your face and continued to pay attention to the palm of his hand making sure that no point of his palm remained unkissed; but this time, between one kiss and another, you were leaving wet trails on his skin, trying to trace the folds his hand created with the tip of your tongue. His hands had a taste similar to the one of his lips but more decided and a bitter aftertaste, but which you loved to death.

Your tongue was drawing a mosaic of humidity and freshness on his skin that sparked a heat to Arthur’s core which with every kiss you laid on his skin expanded more and more while with his eyes still closed and with his short breath he followed the movements of your lips that were loving him.

You felt the same little tremors which coming from his skin shaking his hand through your lips as if they were small lightning bolts running through his veins, while you filled the inner part of his fingers with the same kind of open-mouthed kisses, kissing each phalanx and each hill formed by his fingers, inserting your tongue in the space between his fingers before turning his hand to take care of the back.

The palm of his hand rested on yours and through this contact you felt the wet trails that your tongue had left on his skin. You smiled to yourself at the thought that your wet footprints were leaving a mark on his worn out hands and you hoped that, perhaps, your loving touch might one day replace all the pain those hands had touched and experienced and that they carried on themselves.

You didn’t want to change him or erase his story because every single thing he went through made him the man you loved, and there was nothing about him you didn’t love with all of yourself. What you wanted was to weaken his wounds by sprinkling your love on them, as if it were a cream smeared on an open wound. You wanted to kiss him with such fierce and heavy ardour that you would take away all the suffering that was in his worn hands.

When you lifted up your face to look at him and no longer feeling the touch of your lips he opened his eyes, crossing yours. His gaze carried a fire that lit you from within, his short breath was in full contrast with his relaxed expression and his face muscles were relaxed. You smirked proudly knowing what even the simpler touch of your lips could do to him, before you put your lips back on his skin and began to kiss the back of his hand as you had done just before with the palm, still feeling Arthur’s eyes fixed on your movements.

The skin of his hands looked like a sheet of paper in which his past and his present had been written, everything that was and would be was there, written through the swollen veins that covered the back of his hands as if they were words that on this sheet of paper were writing his story and flowed between his long and bony fingers as if they were rivers running along well defined paths.

You wish you could have flowed into his hands just as his veins did, you wish you were even his veins to flow into him and love him from within. You would have found a new way to love, more all-encompassing and deep than any human being had ever loved another person before.

You read the words in his veins by exploring them with your lips and by tracing a wet trail along their length as if you really wanted to be able to read all the stories his hands carried with them. Through the wet trail and the kisses you were drawing along his back you finally reached his knuckles. You raised your eyes crossing Arthur’s gaze and keeping it locked on his you led your parted lips on the knuckle at the base of his middle finger, kissing it slowly.

You teased him with a starving look before starting to suck his knuckle by moving the tip of your tongue around it to soak it completely while your lips were pushing his skin toward your mouth. You stopped looking at each other’s eyes when Arthur closed his own and opened his mouth to release a sweet moan of pleasure.

"Y/N..." You grinned with his knuckle still between your lips and proudly repeated the same dance of lips and tongue with the others knuckles, kissing and sucking each one of them while the sweet whining coming out of Arthur’s lips alternated with the rhythmic movement of his chest rising and falling quickly to catch the air your caresses were taking away from him.

“Y/N, just kiss me.” It was what went out in a sweet prayer when by now you had begun to kiss also the knuckles of the other hand, repeating the same movements and kissing the back as you had done so far with the other one. You smiled tenderly at the pleading groan he had let slip. You couldn’t have done otherwise than to grant him every touch he needed and removed your lips from his hand, more than happy to satisfy his request.

Before you could make any other move he rushed toward you and surrounded your face with his hands to approach it to his and in a second his hungry lips were on yours. His tongue pressed impatiently on your lips to allow him to enter your mouth and explore it with such lust it expressed the wonderful torment that you made him feel only with just your mouth until then.

Soon this kiss turned by itself into a tangle of bodies, tongues and caresses you both couldn’t resist.

The first time he touched you, you were surprised how such worn hands like his which held so much pain inside could have such a delicate and gentle touch, but after all the time you spent knowing him and loving him every day more than the previous one, by now you knew he had absorbed from this pain the ability to love and the will not to hurt anyone.

Good people manage to absorb from their own pain only what can help them to do good, and Arthur was one of those. This pain had helped Arthur to understand how important it was not to allow anyone to live the same wounds he had; not surprisingly his desire in his life was to make people smile.

When he had met you more than ever this desire had become stronger within him, to the point that he was afraid to spread his pain even through his touch and knowing well how destructive it was in the early months he was even afraid to touch you.

But not anymore. Now he was learning to let himself be loved without feeling indebted and without being afraid that all of that could end if only he had done something wrong.

His touch was still as delicate and gentle as the first time and that would never change. It was the touch he granted the world not to break it and the touch he bestowed on what he loved, and he loved you more than anything else.

part two.

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