#LITERALLY the most beautiful woman alive what the hell

[bipolarediaz]

pantone + pride flags

nia nal - trans

cred.

#supergirledit #nianaledit #dreameredit #supergirl #nia nal #my gifs #trans #LITERALLY the most beautiful woman alive what the hell #actual space princess nia nal

[boringkate]

Here’s a Mega folder with a handful of junk for you trans girls to watch

https://mega.nz/folder/g14TWJaL#u5hER7DzOJbdJbAR0mhtBQ

///TGIRL FEATURE FILMS (alphabetical order)

Adam (2019) it's about a cis boy who's mistaken for a trans boy and rolls with it. Big cast of trans characters including a tgirl played by a tgirl who everyone wants to fuck. Directed by a trans dude. Highly legit. If you're still hung up on pre release speculation based on the novel then you're the most annoying person alive.

Assassination Nation (2018) The first half is Euphoria and the second half is The Purge. ONE OF THE BEST TGIRL MOVIES OF ALL TIME.

Bit (2019) Lesbian girl power vampire movie where the main character is a tgirl played by a tgirl. It's solid. I find it frustrating that they hint at her being trans without explicitly acknowledging it (and she's passing as fuck, so it's easy to not notice), but I know that's what some of y'all want.

Boy Meets Girl (2014) Cis dude for trans girl love story. Pretty normie, but also you see her fully naked (gock out) at the end.

Funeral Parade of Roses (1969) Extremely 60s. Cool as hell.

Lady Daddy (2010) South Korean romcom about a trans girl played by a cis girl who tries unconvincingly to back pass when she finds out she has a kid. Very cute.

Lingua Franca (2019) written directed and starring Isabel Sandoval. An undocumented trans woman immigrant in New York deals with a cis dude partner being a cis dude. Which is also the plot of The Garden Left Behind (2019).

Myra Breckinridge (1970) Raquel Welch is a trans woman and her goal is the destruction of the last vestigial traces of traditional manhood! It's Fight Club! It's Hackers! It's divisive, but it's probably my favorite movie!

So Pretty (2019) Literally the first scripted feature length (non pornographic tho it does have cock) film to feature two trans women played by trans women kissing eachother.

Something Must Break (2014) THE OTHER BEST TGIRL MOVIE OF ALL TIME. Drugs. Crimes. Gock. Slow motion pissing. Slow motion park Fucking. Genuinely the most beautiful sex scene I've seen in any movie. And she makes it to the end still alive and more sure of herself and at peace than ever.

Tangerine (2015) Groundbreaking and also a bunch of the secondary characters are real life pornstars (which I think is neat).

The Garden Left Behind (2019) This and Lingua Franca (2019) really are tgirl twin films, but (like with Antz and A Bug’s Life) the vibes and details make them distinct (I assume tho tbh I’ve never watched Antz).

///TGIRL DOCUMENTARIES

Bambi (2013) about a trans girl showgirl in 50s/60s paris

Paris is Burning (1990) basically it's Pose.

Shinjuku Boys (1995) Trans dudes working in a tokyo club that caters to tboy chasing cis girls. There's at least one trans girl in the mix too.

///FORCED FEMINIZATION

A Reflection of Fear (1972) They raised her as a girl and it made her do murders! It drags in places, but the girl in it is so ethereal and it has ageplay vibes and daddy issues.

Memory Run (1996) A very fun direct to video scifi action flick about fighting fascism by blowing up your pre transition self with a rocket launcher + it's based on a novel written by a trans woman.

She-Man A Story of Fixation (1967) Notable for being such a cliche sissy maid fantasy while also coming out so early + it was Bob Clark's first film lol.

Sleepaway Camp (1983) A more famous version of Reflection of Fear.

Surrender Dorothy (1998) A MUST WATCH. I personally bought a physical DVD and made an ISO of it for you because I was unsatisfied with the quality of the only copy that seemed to exist online. I ALSO PERSONALLY CREATED MY OWN SUBTITLES FOR IT BECAUSE EVEN THE DVD DIDN’T INCLUDE ANY! WHICH TOOK HOURS TO DO!

The Skin I Live In (2011) A rapist is kidnapped and turned into a girl by a mournful vengeful plastic surgeon. Which was also the plot of Victim (2010). I never really vibe with Pedro Almodóvar movies, but I recognize this is the preeminent forced feminization film.

///SHORT FILMS

Gender Troublemakers (1993) Some 90s Toronto trans girls fucking and discoursing. Explicit tgirl on tgirl action. This is the only one on the list that I haven’t actually watched yet. I’m hyped to watch it tho. Seems mindblowingly rad af.

Happy Birthday Marsha (2018) It's about Marsha P. Johnson.

I don't Know (1971) I'm obsessed with the trans girl in this one she just keeps popping up in all kinds of early 70s stuff. Directed by Penelope Spheeris (who is the sister of the cis gf in it).

Mesmeralda (2019) AN ABSOLUTE BANGER HOLY FUCK THE VIBES ARE OFF THE CHARTS! PLS WATCH THIS! I refuse to apologize for it being 15GB or to re encode it. It’s worth every byte and I want to ensure that this full quality copy doesn’t disappear off of the internet.

Pat Rocco's Changes (1970) It's that same girl again!

Queens at Heart (1967) I can't get over that hairdresser girl thinking she's back passing. Most adorably weak boymode ever.

Shangri-La (2021) Another Isabel Sandoval joint.

The Yellow Wallpaper (2021) Freshly post op girl with a supportive boyfriend goes unhinged.

Undress Me (2012) Jana Bringlöv Ekspong did a few short films. Give janabringlove a google after watching this.

///JUST LIKE BTW

Some of these would be tough to find elsewhere, but most of the movies are also watchable on fmovies and/or can be torrented in higher quality.

After you've worked your way through the folder then just start doing Google searches for trans films. Look at IMDB keywords and letterboxd lists. There are so many more out there. These are just like my personal picks.

#trans #trans girls #trans films #queer films

[astrologydayz]

ASTRO SEXOLOGY NOTES🔞 - NATAL CHART7🍒

💋 KISS ASTEROID - 8267 IN ARIES = into rough, bold, passionate, & fiery kissing/makeout sessions<33. They can also be a big fan of tongue teasing, & lip biting/nibbling🫦. They really want2feel all that passion someone has for them when they're being kissed<33. It can also get kinda clumsy here sometimes because it can happen on such an impulsive/or they can suddenly get the need2act, 2 just follow their "instincts asap"🫰🏼. 💋 KISS ASTEROID - 8267 IN CANCER = into vulnerable, intense, & emotional kissing/makeout sessions<33. Kissing can mean a lot 2 these people/or when they really kiss someone, there has 2 have some type of feels✨ - can be any type tho<33. They can also be the type 2 looooove long intimate makeout sessions/or just really like 2 take their time/not rush it<33. They want their kisses to be felt an eternity afterwards.

💋 KISS ASTEROID - 8267 IN LEO = into confident, heated, & powerful kissing/makeout sessions<33. Kissing can be like some kind of artform 2 them - they want 2 show u that they're the best of the best💅🏽 - "no lips move like theirs"<33. They can be big on taking charge/"leading the moment"👄 - deciding the pace, etc. Usually very confident in their kissing skills here/ready2show off<33.

KISS ASTEROID - 8267!

MARS/8TH HOUSE IN TAURUS IN A WOMAN'S CHART = typically sexually attracted 2 people who are "conventionally beautiful"/"classic beautiful people"/2people who takes real good care of themselves - looks good, smell good, etc. She can be very big on being with/or finding someone who's eager 2 please her a lot sexually/show her how much they really want 2 keep keeping her<33. 8th house in Taurus women could want/seek 2 be provided for - in, & out of bed<33. She's sexually attracted 2 people who's secure in themselves/in life, & 2 people who ain't afraid of getting shit done. She finds tact, security, & sincerity sexy as hell! Her neck can be one of her most sensitive zones, so go crazy there👅💋. She can be a big fan of food sex/fruit, & cream sex🍒🍓. She can also find people that cooks real good really attractive, or worth keeping!😻 Sexually attracted 2 artistic, charming, stable, & romantic people<33. SUN CONJUNCT/TRINE/QUINTILE MARS IN A MANS CHART = these men are strong, courageous/bold, sexy - very very sexual individuals/very sexually charged, they're also charismatic, & confident - usually Alpha men. These men are not afraid of going after what they want sexually😼 - if they see something they want = they go after it 100%. They don't want it 2 be 2 easy tho, they really dig a challenge<33 - they love the hunt/the chase in the beginning!🏃‍♂️ Men with this aspect feels truly alive/powerful, & strong when they're using their dick/getting off - it's like their own "personal thing thing"🫶🏼. The conjunction can cry a little bit if they get rejected tho😭😂 - their ego can take a big hit. MARS CONJUNCT/SQUARE/QUINCUNX URANUS IN A MANS CHART = these are the men that can have trouble with controlling themselves sexually/they can literally get horny/hard out of nowhere2, or just not really think about what they're actually doing until after they've already done it🤔 - they can be very quick on it/quick 2 act without truly thinking. This aspect gives a lot of "self control" as a reward in the end, or rather - "the ability 2 choose yourself", but it takes a ton of failed tries/loss of self control a lot at first<33. Oh, & these men are very experimental in bed usually - always willing 2 try new shit for the betterment of pleasure. Their turns ons can be unheard of tho, or just kindaaaa/really unusual/eccentric. They can be into some pretty wild/freaky shit/they can also use sex as a way of letting go of their frustrations/aggressions.

MARS/LUST ASTEROID - 4386 IN 2ND HOUSE = a person who can be really sexually attracted 2/turned on by people who's secure in themselves/2 people with a certain value system - "a strong sense of self2"/or turned on by money💰/by people with money💵/by people who's got serious financial goals/turned on by people who's into making bank<33. Can also be sexually attracted 2 mouths/neck areas, or that can be some of their own big turn on areas👄<33. MARS/LUST ASTEROID - 4386 IN 4TH HOUSE = a person who can be really sexually attracted 2/turned on by people from their own home country/sexually attracted2 people with the same ethnicity as them<33. Can also be very sexually attracted 2 chests/stomachs/or breasts, or again that can be some of their own big turn on areas<33. They can also have sexual partners who can resemble some/one of their family members/or remind them of them. MARS IN 7TH HOUSE people usually doesn't do one night stands. It's not really "their thing"/it's not something they like 2 practise - & if they do = it's because they still feel some type of connection 2 the other person✨ - yeah, even if they've just met<33. They're also the "give, & take kind" in bed🫰🏼 - they want it 2 be 50/50, always - they never just take. They would honestly prefer 2 give, rather than 2 take💋.

MARS CONJUNCT/SQUARE/QUINCUNX SASSI ASTEROID - 7500 = can be very sexually attracted 2/turned on by sassy/bratty people<33 - basically into people who can't keep their mouth shut😻. They can also be VERY bratty themselves tho - they loooove crossing lines/love doing the opposite of what they're asked/told<33 - not everyone can handle them🤷‍♀️. They can definitely be too much for some people.

MERCURY CONJUNCT/TRINE MARS people can be really sexually attracted2 certain hands🖐🏽/fingers/turned on by dirty talking/or talking under sex<33. Certain voices🗣️/languages, or certain things said can also show up as a big turn on<33. Oral sex can also be something they're really into/or just really enjoy doing! Sexting could also be something they're a fan of doing📱<33. People with 5th house in Cancer usually doesn't do just "casual sex", & if they do = there's still some type of feelings/emotions revolving around that certain connection/person✨<33.

MARS CONJUNCT/TRINE SATURN can show a person not having that NEED4sex. Like they can ofc still REALLY REALLY love it🫶🏼, but can show up as them not having any problems with going without - self control, check✔️<33. MARS CONJUNCT/TRINE EROS people exudes sexual confidence!💅🏽😻 These people are the ones who are very big on fulfilling their sexual urges/desires - each one they have/get<33. They can also receive a lot of praises from others on their sex game - they can be very very erotic🫦<33.

WOMEN WITH CUMMING ASTEROID - 14348 SQUARE/QUINCUNX SATURN can show them having a harder time with getting orgasms - could have been especially hard in their teenage/young adult years/or it can be something they're not really comfortable with in general<33.

CUMMING ASTEROID - 14348 CONJUNCT MC can show a person making a name for themselves/being a star in the adult entertainment industry👄<33.

PEOPLE WITH MARS/5TH/OR 8TH HOUSE IN CANCER can hate having sex with protection - they can feel like it takes away from really "feeling" each other/takes away from really enjoying the sex 2 full capacity💋.

MARS CONJUNCT/SQUARE/QUINCUNX PREY ASTEROID - 6157 can show a person getting sexually preyed upon a lot throughout their life🙄🫠. MOON CONJUNCT/TRINE MARS IN A MANS CHART can show him not having any issues with getting/gaining sexual attention/attraction from women💋 - women notice him a lot, & respond very well 2him, & his energy🫶🏼<33.

THANKS4READING<33 APPRECIATE U, ALWAYS!❤️🍒

MASTERLIST

#astrology #astro community #mars astrology #astro notes #astrology notes #astrosexology #asteroids #birth chart

[co-sharkie]

Girlfriend

Grayson Waller x F! Wrestler! Reader

Summary: Grayson keeps flirting with you in front of everyone.

“How’s it going, beautiful?” Grayson smirked at you when he walked past. “That ring gear fits you well. I love—”

“Waller, if you don’t shut the hell up, I’ll make you!” Naomi, who was walking with you, shouted at the Australian flirt.

Grayson raised his hands in mock surrendering. “What, a guy can compliment a hot girl?” He laughed and strutted away, but not before giving you a wink.

You giggled into your hand. He was always flirting with you at work and the girls were getting overprotective of you.

Naomi rolled her eyes. “I’ll kick his ass in the ring if you want me to, boo. I don’t like how he talks to you.”

You smiled at Naomi. She’s been one of your closest friends since starting on Smackdown. She’s also been the one most protective of you since she heard of Grayson Waller flirting with you every time he sees you. “It’s all good. Honestly, I just tune it out.”

—

Grayson was getting ready for his tag team match with Austin when he saw you standing backstage with Charlotte Flair. If there was one woman on the roster he was too scared to flirt with you in front of, it was Charlotte. He knew she wouldn’t hesitate to pummel him as soon as she noticed any discomfort from you.

It was already established between you two that his flirting at work was fine. However, none of the company knew you two were a thing, and have been for many years.

“Stare any longer and Charlotte might come over here and beat your ass.” Austin said. He found it funny how obsessed his friend was with you.

“Can’t help it, mate. She’s gorgeous. If I had to guess she’s got a thing for me, too.”

“Yeah, keep dreaming buddy.” Grayson laughed. He can’t wait to see the look on Austin’s face when he realizes he already had you.

—

You were chatting with Charlotte about her upcoming match tonight. She kept a peering off behind you, like she was lost in thought.

“What do you keep looking at?” You turned around to match her gaze. You saw Grayson, staring at you with those eyes you love. When your eyes met, he winked. Austin groaned and tugged him away from your sight.

Charlotte frowned. “I always catch him staring at you. Do not notice this? It’s literally every night. No matter what arena we are at, he finds you.”

You laughed. “He does, doesn’t he. Almost like he’s obsessed with me.”

Charlotte sighed. “Honey, if he makes you uncomfortable, we can talk to someone about it.”

“No, no. It’s ok, I don’t mind it all that much.” You waved her off.

—

After Grayson ironically lost another match, he sat back in medical. They had to check up on him since he missed a move and bashed his elbow pretty hard onto the canvas.

“There he is,” Grayson looked up from his chair to see you walk in. “how’s that elbow feeling?”

You leaned down to kiss his forehead. “Better now that I get to actually talk to you tonight.” He mumbled.

“Awe, I’m sorry. The girls have been getting pretty protective lately.”

“Pretty sure Charlotte was going to burn me alive earlier.” He whined. “I’m convinced she just hates me.”

You pulled a chair up next to him. You ran your fingers through his hair and he leaned against you. “No, I don’t think she hates you. They don’t know we’re together, so they assume the worst.”

“Maybe it’s time to tell them. I want to flirt with my girlfriend without the feeling that I’m going to get murdered at every corner.” He took your face in his hand. “I also want to be able to kiss you.”

He smirked and leaned in for a kiss. The motion was quickly halted when the door to medical burst open.

Still in his ring gear, Randy Orton stood tall, holding his lower back with his hand. He winced as he took a step in but stopped when he saw you two.

He pointed at Grayson, then you, then back to Grayson. “What do you think you’re doing, Waller?” Randy almost yelled.

“What do you think you’re doing interrupting my time with my girlfriend?” Grayson matched Randy’s energy.

Randy looked back and forth between you two again. “Girlfriend?” He was extremely confused. “As far as I’m aware, she’s not interested in you.”

“What—!”

“Uh, Randy. We have been together for a while.” You cut Grayson off before he could continue to argue. “We’ve just never told anybody so it didn’t go public.”

Randy stood confused for a few more minutes. Grayson was pouting in his chair. “Well you could’ve just said so, kid.” Randy started laughing. He winced and grasped at his back again. “You should probably start telling the girls soon. If they hear about… this whole things before hearing about the whole… dating thing, that boy’s dead.”

“Will do. Now get that back checked out, you’re looking a little rough.” You smiled.

You grabbed Grayson’s hand and started to tug him out of the medical room so Randy could lay down.

“And you thought she was out of my league.” Grayson stuck his tongue out at Randy. The older man rolled his eyes and waved Grayson away.

—

Grayson has changed out of his ring attire. He was hanging out around catering with Austin towards the end of the night.

He spotted you walking in with Naomi, both of you also no longer in wrestling gear. Austin spotted Grayson’s eyes light up when he saw you. “Grayson, don’t!” Austin tried to reach for Grayson’s hand to keep him from walking off but he didn’t have time.

In order to save his friend from the wrath of Naomi, Austin trailed after Grayson.

Grayson leaned up against the wall near you. “Hey, babe.” He started.

“Absolutely not.” Naomi used her body to block the view of you from Grayson. She continued to chat with you about next week’s plans.

Frustrated, Grayson tried to get around Naomi but every way he went, she blocked his path. You were having a hard time keeping in your laughter.

“Naomi, I have something important to tell you.” You said.

“Of course, let’s get away from him first.” She pointed her thumb behind her, right at Grayson.

“Oh, it’s actually about him.” Naomi looked puzzled. “We’re a thing.”

She suddenly turned around to face Grayson. “You better not be blackmailing her or something!” She pointed an accusing finger at him.

Grayson threw his arms up. “Why does everyone think I’m doing something bad to her. We’re fucking married! She’s my wife!”

Austin stood behind Grayson, shocked. “Married!?”

You laughed. “Yeah, sorry guys. We never told anyone because we didn’t want it to be public. Public relationships are a hassle.”

“Is that why you never minded when he horribly flirted with you?” Naomi asked.

You nodded. “Sorry for never telling you guys.”

“Girl, you have nothing to apologize for.” Naomi laughed. “I’m just glad you didn’t have some creep chasing after you!”

Grayson frowned. “I’m not a creep…”

Austin shrugged. “No, but with how much you stared at her I’m was almost convinced you were a serial killer.”

#grayson waller x reader #wwe fanfiction #wwe x reader

[whatswrongwithblue]

The Fire in the Sin

Chapter 7 - Ashes in My Wake

Word count: 7,622. Read on AO3. Series Masterlist. <- Previous Chapter.

Summary: Alastor meets the woman he will someday marry, but instead of recognizing that he is smitten, his first instinct is to try and take her soul.

Series Summary:

In the 1950's, Alastor met the woman he would eventually marry but unfortunately his Radio Demon persona went for her soul rather than her hand. He has to learn what it means to love, and cherish, without possessing and he does. Their relationship is beautiful, strong, unbreakable . . . but he carries a dark secret through their marriage for decades until eventually he has to face the consequences of that secret and leave her, without warning, for seven years. He returns, finding her at the Hazbin Hotel, and has to convince her to forgive him, while being literally bound to secrecy, unable to tell her any of things he now is desperate to explain to her.

(This is a duel timeline fic, timestamps will be a the top of every chapter.)

Chapter 7 - Ashes in My Wake

Pride Ring

1952

Alastor just loved Cannibal Town.

It was such a charming little village and the people here were so cheery and well mannered. They would have eaten him alive and raw had he not been a powerful Overlord and good friends with Rosie, but since he wasn’t on the menu, he was always treated like an honored guest.

He was at one of the outdoor cafes, enjoying a dinner of rare venison steak, cooked in butter and human marrow. Rosie still refused to tell even him how she supplied her town with real human flesh - he was certain she was breaking several of laws that kept Sinners stuck there in Pride Ring  - but it was one of the few things he couldn’t get himself here in Hell. He had always wondered, if he had ventured into the world of cannibalism while he was alive if he would have had an appetite for it then, or if was just a feature of his demon form. It was one of his greatest regrets from his killing years and the worst part of it, he simply had not thought of it. Rosie had truly broadened his horizons . . . once they had stopped trying to kill each other.

Alastor was a man of detail; he noticed everything. His mother had loved that about him for it meant he kept a straight room and always complimented her on a new piece of clothing or hairstyle. His father had no patience for it and would often beat him as a small child when Alastor would quickly get overwhelmed in a new place with too many new things for his young mind to process. But here in Hell, it was his most valuable talent. Nothing slipped past him, and it always gave him an upper hand in a game of wits.

All this meaning, he noticed the black-haired feline beauty walk past him on the sidewalk right away.

She was clearly not one of Rosie’s contracted souls; everything about her dress and style stood out from the other cannibals, and yet she walked among them as if she belonged. The stranger even stopped and hugged a couple women who approached her on the sidewalk, greeting them like old friends, and the trio walked into the small bar and lounge that was across the street.

That bar was one of Alastor’s most frequented locations and he had never seen that woman before. She wasn’t an Overlord, and she wasn’t a Cannibal, so how the hell was she walking around these streets and not being torn to pieces?

He kept an eye on the entrance of the lounge to make sure she hadn’t made an exit as he finished his meal and then made his way across the street, suddenly in the mood for some top shelf scotch.

“Alastor!” Rosie greeted him from her place at the bar. She pulled him in for a hug before he took a seat next to her, “Ugh, I’m so glad I bumped into you here. You wouldn’t believe the week I had. So many more souls are showing up around here these days. I guess cannibalism became a bit of a fad in Japan during that last great war ‘up top’ and some of these guys don’t even speak English! I think they wound up in the wrong afterlife and what’s a girl to do?!”

She tossed back the last of her cocktail and waved the bartender down for more. It was a bit out of character to see Rosie so ruffled in public, but Alastor supposed they all had their bad days.

“Have you tried shipping them off to the Doomsday District? They haven’t had a cult massacre send souls their way in quite a while and language barriers aren’t such an issue down there. The imagery . . . speaks for itself,” Alastor said with a chuckle.

The bartender set their drinks down and Rosie lifted hers in a cheer.

“You, my friend, are priceless. What a splendid idea!” Rosie took a more ladylike sip of her martini this time but then immediately became animated again when something caught her eye from the far side of the lounge.

The cat demon dressed in black and orange was sitting down at a table with the two women she had met on the street, deeply engrossed in an apparently hilarious conversation.

“Mina! Is that you, dear?!” Rosie said, and waved when she immediately caught the woman’s attention.

The woman smiled and excused herself from her group and came over to the bar to get immediately crushed into one of Rosie’s vice-like hugs.

“I’m sorry I haven’t had a chance to stop by lately. Work's just been unbelievable,” the woman said, the slightest bit of an accent coming through in her speech.

“Oh, trust me, I know the life of a working woman. Put in an all-day shift and you still gotta go home and cook and clean, can you believe it! Ah, where are my manners?!” Rosie said, and turned in her barstool so she no longer had her back turned to Alastor.

“Mina, meet Alastor, one of my dearest friends. Most people know him as the Radio Demon, but around here, we just call him by his first name. Alastor, this is Mina. She’s just about my most loyal customer. She’s got a wicked appetite for men’s hearts, the little minx, and she knows which shop has the freshest ones,” Rosie said with a wink at Mina.

“The Radio Demon?” Mina asked, and her eyes darted back and forth between Alastor and Rosie. She smiled well, but he could see how nervous she suddenly was.

“So, you’ve heard of me?” he asked.

“Who hasn’t?” she said simply, no longer smiling.

“You must have quite an interesting tale to tell yourself if you’re around these parts, but it’s funny because I’ve never heard of you.”

“Oh, well, lucky me then,” she said, holding his narrowing gaze. Irish, the accent was definitely Irish.

“Oh, Alastor, stop it,” Rosie said, and playfully smacked his chest with the back of her hand, “she pays my Emporium quite a lot of money, don’t chase her away. And she’s one of Abaddon’s, and even you don’t want them breathing down your neck, they’re awfully protective of their own.”

Mina raised an eyebrow, looking a bit more confident then.

“My apologies,” Alastor said, “I didn’t mean to come across as anything but a gentleman. I was simply curious, it’s not every day I see an unfamiliar face around here.”

“I come here quite often,” she said, and it almost sounded like a challenge.

“So do I.”

“Then I suppose I won’t be unfamiliar for long.”

“I wouldn’t want your luck to run out.”

“Oh Mylanta!” Rosie interjected, standing up between them, “I should have known better than to put the two of you boneheads in a room together. Mina, I’ve had just the shittiest week, would you be a dear and play one of your songs for us?” Alastor almost laughed into his glass when he saw how uncomfortable that question made this Mina character suddenly seem. “Not to worry, one of your regular songs will do just fine. Honestly, honey, this place could just use a bit of extra liveliness tonight.”

Neither of them knew it at the time, but Mina’s decision to give in to Rosie’s request, smile an almost flirtatious smile at Alastor, and adjust her attitude, was a major turning point in both of their lives. Had she continued to mouth off, or worse, refuse Rosie and return to her group of friends, Alastor would have eventually lost interest in her.

“That would be alright, I suppose. And I hear the gentleman in our presence prefers jazz?”

“Oh ho! You really have heard of me!” he said pleasantly.

“Just enough to know to play it safe around you,” Mina said and turned away, heading for the piano in the corner of the lounge.

Well, Alastor couldn’t help but smile a little wider when his ego was stroked like that.

___

Her song had been . . . entrancing, to say the least. When prompted as to what Rosie had meant by one of Mina’s “regular” songs, the leader of Cannibal Town had informed him of the secret talent Mina possessed of controlling others with her singing but assured him, that was not what had happened that night.

“You’ll know it if you ever hear it. But no, I’m afraid that was just her normal singing voice. Why?”

“No reason,” he had quickly replied.

“You’re interested in her!” Rosie gasped in over dramatic surprise.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he huffed.  

“Oh not like that,” Rose said, “you want her power for yourself. And of course you do, who wouldn’t! But believe me, Alastor, it’ll be a waste of your time. You offer that girl a deal and it’ll just offend her.”

“Then I’ll just have to figure out a brilliant plan to convince her,” he said, eyes flashing to radio dials as he turned away.

He studied her for weeks during his down time, figuring out where her usual hang outs were and lingering in the shadows, trying to gather as much information about her as possible while going unnoticed. The kind of deals that were irrefusable were always the most personal, so he had to figure out what made this woman tick.

It was infuriating how little she left The Pit; Abaddon’s little protected neighborhood of Pride Ring where no one, not even Overlords like himself, could even get into without an invitation. Mina also seemed to make a point of being as inconspicuous as possible. She was beautiful but only if one took the time to really look at her; otherwise, she seemed completely average. Nothing about her features was striking enough to catch a casual onlooker and she clearly used that to her advantage.

He purposefully sent one of his leashed pets after her one night on her walk back home. She had been alone and looking as vulnerable as any soul in Hell possibly could. Alastor felt ridiculous but from the rooftop above where he could see the whole show, he held his large ears down flat just in case she used her voice as a defense. He didn’t doubt Rosie’s description of how powerful this girl was for an average Sinner and didn’t want to find himself jumping from the rooftop against his will.

The monstrous remains of the soul he owned launched itself at Mina’s back and she jumped out of the way with impressively quick reflexes and then morphed into a very large, grotesque beast that vaguely resembled a jaguar, ripped the soul in half with a bite and well placed dig of her massive claws, and then left it on the sidewalk still squirming as she turned back into her more human-like form and continued walking.

Alastor dropped his hands from his ears in shock; a feeling he hadn’t felt in more years than he could recall.

Whatever he used to convince Mina to sell her soul to him, it wouldn’t likely be for his protection.

It seemed to him that he would have to get much closer to this girl if he was to figure her out.

After several more visits to the lounge in Cannibal Town, he finally saw her there again. Not that he was going there specifically to find her, it was already his favorite place for a drink, but it did give him another reason to go there at the end of the day.

To his great advantage, she was sitting at a table alone, reading.

Honestly, who brought a book to a bar?

He didn’t go to her right away, instead taking the time to order a glass of whiskey neat for himself and then asked the bartender for Mina’s usual, which turned out to be a nauseously sweet effervescent red blend wine.

When he set it down in front of her and took his seat across the small table from her, she frowned at him.

“I’m waiting for someone.”

“Is it a date?” he asked, already suspecting the answer. He had been stalking her for weeks and knew there was no one special in her life and figured it was a sore subject for her as it was with most single women.

“Would you leave me alone if I said that it was?”

He smiled. “No.”

She slammed her book shut.  “What do you want?”

“You are defensive. Have I done something to offend you?”

“You mean other than simply being who you are?” she asked and when he simply continued to smile instead of responding, she sighed. “No.”

“And what is wrong with being who I am?” he asked.

“Do you think I’m stupid? You’re literally the most powerful Overlord I can name, and you expect me to think you’re talking to me because you want to be friends?”

“That is quite the compliment and backhanded insult all in one sentence. I’ll have you know; I am perfectly capable of having friends.”

“Anyone you don’t make deals with?” she asked.

“You know, you were being much more pleasant with me when we last parted.”

“Answer the question.”

“Of course, there are people I don’t make deals with. Although, you shouldn’t say ‘make deals with’ as if it’s some unsavory dirty business. Deals can be quite beneficial to both parties,” he paused, taking a sip of his whiskey, “take Rosie for example. We have been friends for years and I’ve never made a deal with her, but I would be honored to if the situation ever required it. “

Mina pondered his words for a moment, running a nail up and down her wine stem.

“I’ve spent my years here in Hell avoiding people like you.”

Alastor leaned forward. “Again, what’s so bad about me?”

Mina looked at him like he’d just made the worst joke she’d ever heard. “You have a radio station with nothing but screams of the souls you’re tearing to pieces.”

He smiled and tilted his head. “I find it funny that offends you, seeing as how you get paid to torture. Tell me, what’s the longest number of years someone has been flayed across your rack? Five? Ten? What’s the record for how many times someone has had to completely respawn because you took things a little too far? And then you come here, laugh with friends, sing your songs, and otherwise live a normal, enjoyable life. So maybe, you’re not afraid of what I’ll do to you. Maybe you’re just afraid of how much you and I have in common.”

Mina looked shocked, even a bit angry, but her pupils had practically turned to saucers and the fair skin around her neck had flushed a little and not from her wine. He had struck a nerve, but he suddenly realized she was also very attracted to him, which would give him a wonderful advantage over her going forward.

“Do you usually ask women out with such bizarre speeches?”

Alastor’s smile turned into a wicked grin. “How about we start with me asking you for a dance?”

“How about a deal first?” she said, and he raised his brows in obvious interest. “I’ll ask you one question and if I like the answer, then I’ll dance with you.”

“Ha! You’ll have to try harder than that to scare me off. Ask away,” he said, leaning back in his seat.

“Dickens or Austen?”

He frowned in confusion.

“Charles Dickens or Jane Austen,” she clarified, “who do you prefer?”

Alastor thought silently for a moment before standing up. His eyes flashed a brighter red as he offered her his hand.

“Mary Shelley.”

Mina smiled in satisfaction and took his hand, following him to the dance floor.

___

After a few outings with him, Mina had to admit, she was really starting to like Alastor. It wasn’t clear yet if he was romantically pursuing her or if they were just friends; everything between them had been platonic so far, but secretly Mina began to hope for more. There weren’t many in her circle of friends that had crossed his path, but no one could remember a time when The Radio Demon had a companion on his arm; but it did appear that Alastor was telling the truth when he said he had friends.

Rosie seemed to be the Overlord that he was closest to, but she had been witness to a cordial conversation between him and Zestial. He spoke fondly of a few of the souls he owned, as if they were more his wards under his protection than they were his slaves to do his bidding. Wherever they went, Alastor was courteous to all of their servers and was a generous tipper. He shared her rather macabre sense of humor, was charismatic, chivalrous, and just plain sweet to her.

And he was so good looking. Mina had desired plenty of men before but had spent her time in Hell purposefully single after a lifetime of being repeatedly sexually dissatisfied and put off by all of her suitors rather bad behavior. Even during the few times of year when her feline body went through its hormonal cycle and sent her into heat, she got through it by pleasuring herself and taking out her frustration through her work. But being around Alastor made that little coil inside her heat up in ways it hadn’t in decades. Everything about him, from the static effect of his voice, to his odd perpetual smile, his smell, the way he dressed, his strange haircut and two-toned locked, the little antlers and red ears atop his head . . .

When he had lost his temper on a crass demon on the street who said something lewd to Mina, those antlers had grown, his eyes had glowed green, and Alastor had ripped the demon apart with shadow tentacles that suddenly came out of nowhere . . . Mina didn’t stand a chance. That man fulfilled all her fantasies, even ones she wasn’t aware she had until she met him.

Beyond her physical attraction to him, they really did seem to have a lot in common. And where they weren’t the same, their differences complimented each other well. They both enjoyed drinking but never pushed themselves past a good buzz, and where she enjoyed a sweet wine, he like straight liquor. Their palette for meat was exactly the same, but she liked her savory paired with something sweet when Alastor enjoyed something spicier. They spoke often of how they abhorred violence just for the sake of violence but reveled in it when used with purpose.

“Correct me if I’m wrong,” he said on one of her rare mornings off work, and they had decided to meet up for coffee, “But I’m fairly certain that ‘Mina’ is not a common name in Ireland.”

She gave him a beaming smile then, very pleased with his observation. “You are the first person to ever call me out on that. Even people who knew my birth name never questioned it.”

“What was so wrong with your given name?”

“Margarette,” she said with disgust, “It’s an English name. A colonizer’s name. You have to understand, I was born just in time to see the last bit of my ancestors’ culture nearly wiped out. They were starving us and wiping out our language. You couldn’t be citizens without being baptized and no priest would baptize a child in Ireland if they had a name like Saoirse or Aine. And then ironically, when I came to America, they wanted me to be more Irish. More ‘exotic.’ My manager asked me to come up with a new name for myself and it’s been my own little private joke ever since because I just thought Mina sounded pretty, and I’m pretty sure it’s German. Not that anyone in America knew the difference.”

Alastor laughed, seemingly taking a lot of enjoyment in the perverse beauty of her chosen name. From that day forward, he used her name as much as possible, and stopped calling her by his usual terms of endearment like “dear” or “darling” as often.

Their life stories were another thing that they had in common. Not identical but they gave them a better understanding of each other.

He had grown up in a world immersed in Creole culture and the inevitable racism from the upper class that appropriated it while also condemning it. Once he was an adult, he had to stick to his roots in secret, and used his white-passing privilege to make his way in the world of entertainment. He simultaneously had felt like he was getting away with a sick joke while also ashamed, as if he were betraying his mother somehow. He had tried to make up for it all by using his nuevo riche money to dote on her until her sudden death. When the Great Depression hit, and life for his and his mother’s people only got harder as those left on top continued to exploit them, he had stopped bothering to hold back his darker desires and instead focused his blood lust on the upper-class white demographic he hated the most.

“My favorite part, besides the actual killing of course, was reporting on myself. I had come up with the name ‘The Bayou Killer,’ I thought it had a nice ring to it,” he had said as he told his life story, “but other media sources also started calling me the ‘Equal Opportunity Killer.’ I guess it sounded better than pointing out that being wealthy and of the right color didn’t save you from being hacked to pieces.”

Mina mentally added being violently opposed to xenophobia and racism to her quickly expanding list of things that made Alastor perfect for her. It excited her, but also filled her with trepidation.

She had lost herself and her freewill to relationships before and had to kill to get out of them. And Alastor would always be more powerful and dangerous than she was, so she still had to tread carefully around her feelings for him. But damn, if she wasn’t falling hard and fast.

After several meet ups for drinks or food, Alastor finally asked her to accompany him to a far more intimate location.

They were on a walk together through the park she had come to on her first night in Hell. The black lake still smelled as awful as it did then, but Mina had returned here several times since that first evening and had grown accustomed to it. She still loved the strange and dark plants and the demonic wildlife that was never in short supply here.

Alastor carried his cane behind his back as they walked, not offering Mina a hand or arm to hold onto, but he did make a point of walking close to her side.

He had steered the conversation in a different direction than usual, filling her in on some of the current political ongoings in Hell. She tried to act interested, nodding along at what seemed to be appropriate moments, but the topic had a hard time keeping her attention. Mina was just beginning to tune it out completely when the name Goetia caught her attention.

She was fascinated by the tales of their magic and knowledge of the universe but with her misgivings about the more powerful figures in Hell, had never had the opportunity to get to know one of them before.

“You know some of the Goetia family?” she asked.

“And I’ve killed some of them, too,” he laughed. “Most of them are pompous fools but a couple of them aren’t terrible to converse with. Get them on the subject of their magic and they can’t help but show off. It can be very informative. One of the lower ranking ones resides here in Pride Ring and is throwing a party next week, but I’m not sure if it’s worth going.”

“I would love to go,” Mina said quickly and then felt a little embarrassed. She sounded like a desperate schoolgirl. “I just mean, if I ever could. You know how I feel about politicians, but they just seem so fascinating. And they know so much, I mean, they were there for the building of the pyramids, the Library of Alexandria, the fall of Rome . . . It would just be . . . sorry,” she trailed off with a sigh, “I’m rambling.”

“Don’t apologize, Mina, I adore how passionate you are about your interests. In fact, I suppose the party wouldn’t be so drab if I had company as wonderful as your own.”

“Really?” she asked, no longer trying to hold back her excitement.

“Of course! I’d be happy to have you as my plus one. Would it be presumptuous of me to ask for a small favor in return?”

Blinded by her joy and affection for him, Mina happily asked him what he had in mind.

“Would you sing for me, if I ever needed you to?”

“You don’t mean a normal song, do you?” she asked.

“No, though those are truly wonderful. No, I do mean use your power to help me out, if I ever found myself in a bind,” he clarified and suddenly the mood had shifted, ever so subtly.

Mina paused, carefully considering her next words. “Alastor, if you really ever needed me, you know I’d do my best to be there for you.”

His smile widened, going unnaturally from one end of his face to the other. He held out his hand as if to shake hers, and a halo of green light surrounded it. “Care to make it a deal, then?”  

Mina stepped back as if slapped. Suddenly all her attraction to this man was replaced by alarm and dread.

Alastor caught the distressed look on her face and closed his hand, the green light around him extinguishing as he quickly took on his usual appearance.

“It’s just a little thing, Mina, no need to get upset.”

“Sorry, I tend to get upset when I’ve realized just how stupid I’ve been,” she snapped back.

“Oh darling, don’t be dramatic. I wasn’t asking for your soul,” he said, and she hated the way he was brushing off her concern.

“Not this time, but eventually you would, wouldn’t you?” she said, and Alastor stood straighter at her words as if she had caught him in the act of something nefarious and Mina’s heart broke as she realized that’s exactly what had happened. “So, this whole thing between us was just a plan to get me to trust you?”

God, it was embarrassing how sad she sounded.

Alastor tilted his head in his usual display of uncertainty. “I’m not sure what you mean, I thought we’ve had quite a lovely time of it lately.”

“And it was all just an act, wasn’t it? You’ve been exactly what I’ve wanted so that when the time came, you thought I’d be dumb enough to make a deal with you. Well, congratulations, you really were convincing there for a while, I really believed you cared for me. But this isn’t happening, Alastor. There’s nothing you could ever do to make me accept a deal.”

He walked around her, his hands once again behind him. “Don’t be so certain of that, Mina. Everyone wants something eventually. Even I do. And I do care for you. Those are the reasons why I’m making the deal with you. I could benefit from your abilities, and I trust you enough to keep your end of the bargain.”

“Then why make a binding deal if you trust me? I would have helped you, even if you hadn’t offered me something in return.”

“That’s just the way I work, darling,” he said with a sneer, “I thought you knew that.”

“I should have,” she said, “I really should have. But this is over now, Alastor. I’m going home.”

Mina hadn’t earned her right to portals yet, so she had a long way to go before she got home. She had to walk for a while to get out of the park and constantly checked over her shoulder to make sure Alastor wasn’t following her. Even still, she knew about his ability to hide in the shadows and didn’t feel certain she was actually safe and alone until she was out of the park and able to get a cab.

Once home, she pulled off her clothes and wrapped herself under the covers, doing her best to ignore the silent tears that dampened the pillow beneath her.

___

Alastor fumed on his way out of the park. He was not used to being denied what he was after, and he was definitely not used to making mistakes. The degree in which he had underestimated Mina’s desire for freedom was embarrassing. He had been so certain that he had his claws in her. She had been so clearly infatuated with him that he assumed he could get away with even more than what he had presented her with; he had been playing it safe and it still backfired on him.

It was just a simple deal and she had acted like he’d killed her puppy in front of her.

He lashed out at another demon who was out for an evening stroll. The man was behind him, keeping an awkward pace with him, his shoes were squeaking, and he was just too close to Alastor. Without turning to look, his shadows sprung out from his back and grabbed hold of the oblivious walker, wrapping him up in tentacles, and throwing him into a thick group of trees. Alastor heard the scream and then the squelch of the man’s body being impaled and sighed in satisfaction. Now he could think clearly without distraction.

He had been playing nice with Mina. She was enjoyable to be around; honestly everything about her he had found to be quite pleasant. Over the weeks they had spent together, he had really come to care a bit for her. And despite her initial misgivings about the darker side of his nature, Alastor hadn’t missed how she looked at him when he displayed his power. She liked it. So he never had any intention of allowing harm to come to her, he just wanted to own her power for himself. He could have done far worse to her, and she didn’t appreciate that.

Normally he enjoyed causing fear in people; especially if it was an overdramatic display. If some poor soul recognized him on the street and took off running and screaming, even if Alastor had no malicious intentions towards them in that moment, he usually found some enjoyment in it. Even when they had first met, he had enjoyed the little glimpses of fear in Mina’s eyes whenever his attention was on her.

That night, however, it deeply bothered Alastor how much Mina had been repulsed by his offer. She had looked at him like he had betrayed her.

He couldn’t understand why it had upset her so much and he really didn’t understand why it upset him that she was upset.

Once he was back in his tower and calmed down, he began to formulate a plan. Convincing Mina was not going to happen, so he was going to have to trick her. Force her. But once he had the deal made and her soul was his, she would see that it wasn’t as awful as she believed. He wanted her power at his disposal which meant keeping her alive and well. It was just getting them to that point that would be tricky, but he now realized he was going to have to be cruel to be kind.

___

After a couple weeks of setting things into motion, the opportunity presented itself while Mina was out shopping with a couple of her friends from work. Alastor kept an eye on them as they had dinner, stopped in a little boutique, then a bookstore, and then finally settled into the right outdoor lounge patio and ordered drinks.

Though they had never been there together before, Mina had mentioned it as one of her friend’s favorite places, and since she had been making a point to avoid Cannibal Town since his mishap with her, Alastor figured she would come here sooner or later. So, he had made sure to plant someone who owed him a favor as a server there, with the express intent of that demon slipping something into the drinks there.

He thought date rape drugs were sleezy and desperate, but he wasn’t above cheating to get his way in a deal, and he needed not only Mina, but her friends, and everyone else in that bar to be a lot more helpless than usual if things were to go his way. No one would feel the effects until they tried to use their power.

Then he needed the chaos to begin.

A fight, very much orchestrated by himself, broke out on the inside of the lounge. At first, Mina and her friends only watched in mild amusement as the brawl got larger. Before long though, it got out of hand, because Alastor’s shadow had slunk behind the bar and set the entire shelves of liquor on fire.

There were a few unlucky souls that got trampled inside and burned, but most of them were able to escape, and the sudden surge of people coming out from within the bar pushed everyone from the patio and onto the street, and separated Mina from her friends.

It was complete disorder and even when the crowd was able to break up a bit, Mina couldn’t relocate her companions. They were living in an age before cell phones, which are so handy in emergency situations. Also, coincidentally, Alastor had his shadow grab them and transport them into a couple of locked rooms in buildings nearby. They would get out, eventually. Once the drugs wore off and they were able to use their powers again.

Mina seemed cool and collected in contrast to what was left of the crowd still running about in the streets, though she was obviously looking around for the women she had arrived with. Alastor watched in amusement as she became more irritated with the demons that were losing themselves in their panic. With the distance between them and the noise of the crowd, he couldn’t hear her voice, but at one point she had pulled herself against the wall of the building across the street from the bar, and it was evident in the movement of her mouth that she was singing, likely trying to calm the crowd into order. Even from his high vantage point, Alastor could see the growing look of concern on Mina’s face as realization dawned on her. Her power bound; she was suddenly as vulnerable as she was when she was alive.

His wicked smile broadened, as the green glow of his own magic poured from his mouth and eyes, and he sent the burst of energy towards the flames of the building. They burst forth from what was left of the windows and doorways, crawling along the street below and licking up the walls of the adjacent buildings.

From the green flames came his little army; the tiny remains of the souls of Overlords past. They were small and weak without his command, but when directed they could tear a body apart like demonic puranas. This perfect hell storm of fire and demons spread through the street, devouring dozens as it went, and then chased the fleeing form of Mina into a dead end.

To her credit, she had made it quite a way away before she ran out of the options. She had tried every outlet there was to get to a more open area, but the flames had always gotten there before her, blocking her way.

He had her caught in a narrow alleyway, surrounded on three sides by several stories of tall brick that she couldn’t scale without access to her full demon form. Flames consumed her only exit. She looked skeptically at the wall of fire that paused just there, caging her in.

Alastor formed from shadow behind her, watching as she stared into the flames, her body backlit by the unnatural green glow. He was impressed at how in control of her feelings she seemed to be, even in this dire situation he had built around her.

“I can hold it back for a little while, but eventually,” he said, as the flames moved forward another couple feet, “those flames will make their way in here.”

Mina didn’t jump at the sound of his voice, nor did she show any signs of fear. Instead, her shoulders slumped, and when she turned to face him, she just looked tired. It was once again not the reaction Alastor had been expecting.

“What did you do to me?” she asked in a small voice.

“Why, I did nothing! But, it would seem as if someone slipped something into the drinks at that bar. How unfortunate for the patrons there tonight.”

Mina reached out to slash at him, but he turned to shadow just as her claws made contact with his arm. He reappeared a few feet away from her, a tear in his jacket sleeve. He admired the damage with a grin.

“My, you are fast.”

“Fuck you, Alastor.”

“Now is that anyway to speak to someone who is offering to save your life?”

The flames jumped closer again and Alastor could feel the blistering heat of them, but Mina kept her back turned to the fire, keeping an eye on him instead.

“Make your offer,” Mina challenged.

“Had you accepted my offer the other night, I would have been satisfied with just having access to your powers. For a while, at least,” he winked at her but then his smile grew far more sinister, “but I’m afraid you’ve insulted me and I can’t stand for that. So now the stakes are higher. Give me your soul and you’ll come to no harm. Refuse, and well . . .”

The flames roared up above the height of the buildings surrounding them and the moving hoard of hungry demons could be seen dancing within the fire, waiting to tear their next victim apart.

“That’s not angelic fire,” she said after studying it for a moment, implying it wouldn’t permanently kill her.

“No,” Alastor agreed, anger showing through his features, making his smile look even more crazed than before, “but it burns slower than most. And when it’s done consuming you, you’ll end up like one of those-“ he gestured to the small black and white figures and their gnashing teeth, “-hardly anything left of you but a hungry, insatiable shell. I’d rather keep you just the way you are now, but it’s your choice, my dear.”

Mina said nothing, just stared at him for moment, making eye contact in a way that made Alastor feel completely stripped and bare beneath her gaze. He hated it, and nearly ended it there. His antlers grew heavy on his head, and he felt his shadow expand around him, ready to reach forward and tear her apart.

Instead, he reached out his hand.

“Choose me, Mina. It’ll be far less painful.”

He knew he looked every bit the monster he was in that moment, but he was over playing the gracious gentleman with her. Let her see what her choices really were and the position she had put them both in.

“I’d rather die,” Mina said and turned, walking directly towards the fire.

Alastor froze, eyes widening in surprise. Surely, she was trying to call his bluff, no one was that crazy, not even here in Hell. Mina had heard enough tales of his to know he wasn’t kidding, had spent more than thirty years perfecting her own craft with torture, she had to know what kind of torment she was choosing.

And then the flames touched her skirt and Alastor realized almost too late, that she had meant every word she had ever said to him. She would rather die, be burned, have her soul torn to pieces, and have nothing left of her identity, than to knowingly give up her free will.

He also realized all this at the same moment he figured out that he would never be able to let anything like that happen to her.

The flames touched her at the same moment his shadow grabbed her from behind, snuffing out the fire before it could hurt her, and the two of them disappeared from the alleyway a second before it became completely engulfed in burning green.

__

Alastor had never traveled so far in his shadow form and had never moved another soul by it for more than second, but it took several minutes for them to reach the park and the entire time he could feel her soul against his. Trying to scratch at him, claw at him, push him away, desperate to break free by any means. But she had no power, especially not in this form, where he always had complete control.

He deposited them on a vacant grassy lawn, purposefully dropping her on her backside while he stood towering above her, still in his full-antlered fury.

“You’re insane!” he spat out at her and was alarmed to find he was panting for air. The trip across the city carrying her by shadow had utterly exhausted him and he had to pause to catch his breath, feeling his body return to its normal height and shape as he did so.

Mina stood and every ounce of outrage she had been holding back in that alleyway broke free.

“I’m insane?! You just set fire to an entire city block and burned dozens of people alive because I hurt your feelings by saying ‘no?!’”

She once again tried to leap at him and he once again dodged her attack by dissolving into shadow, but only just barely.

Mina screamed and growled in frustration at her helplessness as she watched him reappear several yards away.

“Fucking men! You’re all the fucking same!”

 That struck a nerve, but Alastor remained silent, smiling all the while Mina continued with her rampage.

She picked up a sizeable rock and hurled it at him, missing him by a few feet.

“Misogynistic piece of shit! You think you’re a better man than others because you don’t use women the same way they do, but you still use us! You can’t appreciate anything unless you own it!” She picked up another stone and threw it, this time getting a little closer to her mark. Mina took a deep sigh and steadied herself. “Well it stops with me. You can hurt me, kill me, threaten my friends, throw everything you’ve got at me, Radio Demon. You’ll. Never. Own. Me.”

Alastor continued to observe her, meeting her eyes, completely and utterly at a loss at what to do next.

“Oh, you fucker, do something!”  she screamed, “don’t just stare at me! Hurt me, tear to me pieces, c’mon! You’re the big, bad Overlord, so fucking act like it! Get it over with!”

“Are you crying?” he asked, not as a jab at her, but in honest confusion.

Mina wiped her face with a sharp motion of her sleeved arm, having been too distracted by her tantrum to notice.

“Fuck you,” she spat, “I’ve never been so fucking angry in my life, of course I’m crying!”

She turned away from him to hide her face and for a second, he felt the need to go to her. He took a step forward before he caught himself.

This was not what he had wanted. He thought he had been so willing to punish her for turning him down but when push came to shove, he hadn’t been able to follow through. Now she was hurt, if only emotionally, and it was all his fault and he hated it.

He started laughing.

Mina turned back around, looking at him like he had grown a second head.

“Stop it,” she said, and it made him laugh harder. She thought he was laughing at her and it made the whole situation even funnier.

“Stop it!” she repeated and marched towards him.

He sat down in the grass, elbows on his knees, and put a hand to his head as he continued to lose his mind.

He was so fucked.

Mina pulled up short, put off from her approach by how completely insane he looked.

“Jaysus, you have completely lost it,” she whispered, and took a couple tentative steps away from the Overlord having a mental breakdown in front of her.

“Oh,” Alastor sighed as he began to regain control of himself. Still chuckling, but no longer lost in his laughing fit, he stood, dusting off the front of his pants and straightened his bow tie. “What an entertaining evening we have had.”

Mina remained silent.

“You are free to go, my dear.”

“Am I supposed to believe that?” she asked.

“I don’t really care if you ‘believe’ me or not, but please . . . leave,” he huffed.

He no longer felt like laughing or smiling, though the latter he couldn’t stop. What he wanted most of all was to put as much distance between himself and this sudden source of weakness of his as possible.

“You’re just going to let me go? After all that? Why?” she demanded.

Alastor sighed.

“It seems I’ve changed my mind. And I never want to see you again.”

Next Chapter ->

@saccharine-nectarine, @inuhalfdemon

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #alastor fanfiction #alastor #alastor x oc #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanfiction #alastor fic #alastor fanfic #alastor x reader #alastor the radio demon #the radio demon #alastor hazbin #hazbin hotel alastor #the fire in the sin

[xpao-bearx]

This is dedicated to the absolutely beautiful hooman bean @basketobread 💕 They are truly one of the best people I've EVER met and has such a kind, wonderful heart!!! Furthermore, all of their artworks are literal ✨️MASTERPIECES✨️ They and their works are a constant source of joy for me and I just got inspired to write this very short, very simple fic of my BG3 Tav and their much beloved character Lunara meeting 🥰 It's not much, but I hope y'all like it and I hope even more that I did Lunara's amazing character justice! This is also my first time writing my Tav in a story format so it's great practice and an opportunity to flesh her out more before I post my fic of her and Astarion :)

More about my Tav here + this is the song she's singing in this story (and fun fact: I headcanon the singer to be my Tav's voiceclaim!) ❤️

Fic is under the cut and thanks sooo much for reading!! \(^o^)/

Darkness consumed the drow cleric's entire visage. A darkness that reminded her of her past in the Underdark; a waking nightmare she miraculously escaped, forging a path of her own, under the light and guidance of her Lady of Silver.

But this time, she feared that this smothering darkness would be...permanent. She could feel herself blinking, yet only blackest black and the stinging prick of her tears greeted her. She felt the ground beneath her and she doesn't think she broke any bones--or so she hopes--but she couldn't move. There was a looming heaviness in her chest and ice gripping at her heart.

Is she...dying? Eyes fluttering shut, she's resigned to her paralysis, but has not given up hope.

Because fuck that, she's most definitely not a quitter.

"M-My Lady of S-Silver..." She murmured, weak in physique but ever strong in her faith. "P-Please watch o-over me, h-help me overcome..."

She hasn't the faintest clue how long she stayed like that, strengthening herself in prayer, though eventually her ears perked up at the sound of...footsteps?

Something--or, rather, someone--sat next to her. She heard some shuffling then the soft strum of a lyre being played and a beautiful, soothing voice reverberating in her head.

"Flower, gleam and glow

Let your power shine

Make the clock reverse

Bring back what once was mine"

As the mystery songstress continued, she could feel power coursing through her veins, slowly but surely. She blinked once more and faint spots of light danced amidst the shadows.

"Heal what has been hurt

Change the Fates' design

Save what has been lost

Bring back what once was mine

What once was mine"

She felt her fingers twitching, toes wiggling; and, like a flower blossoming, she rose. She let out a sharp gasp as she sat up, chest still heavy but not as excruciating as it was before.

She's alive.

She blinked rapidly, perfect vision returning. She had hardly a moment to gather her bearings when someone's voice rang excitedly.

"Holy hells! I'm so glad you weren't, like, completely dead! Good thing I saw you just in time!"

Her gaze landed on the young woman before her. A half-drow with a smile as bright as the sun and mismatched eyes (one, she noticed, being a rather unusual blood red with a prominent scar across it). She was pretty--ahem, very pretty, might she add--but looked worse for wear. Something she was sure she looked, too.

Before either of them could say anything else, a migraine hit them both like a spiked club. They both cradled their heads in their hands, fragments of a hellish nautiloid swirling in their minds, waiting for the pain to pass and their eyes meeting in recognition.

When it finally did, the stranger piped up once more.

"Oh, wow, we're parasite pals!"

Despite the situation of it all, she laughed. A welcoming warmth radiated from the strange stranger, enveloping her and easing the tension of all of today's utter bullshit. From being kidnapped by godsdamned Mind Flayers to being infected by a disgusting parasite, she laughed and felt comforted that, at the very least, she was not alone.

"Indeed we are!" She grinned before holding her hand out. "Thank you so, so much for saving me! My name is Lunara and you are..?"

The stranger beamed, shaking Lunara's hand and her other hand making a theatrical waving gesture. "Mon'sun, at your service, fair maiden! Perhaps you've heard of me, perhaps not. The tale of my titillating life is still being written, you see~"

'Ehe. TIT-illating.' Lunara thought to herself, letting out a small chuckle before clearing her throat. She was a toootally mature adult, after all.

"Well, Mon'sun, Selûne's blessings upon you!" Lunara did a half bow, mimicking Mon'sun's theatrics which Mon'sun definitely approved of. "Besides your incredibly kind and gracious act of saving me, I'm positive my Lady of Silver led you here for a reason. What say you we band together and find a cure for this parasite?"

"Oho, asking to team up so fast? I would say take me out to dinner first, but I'm pretty easy sooo..." She joked, making a show of thinking before gasping dramatically, pretending to cry tears of joy. "Yes! A thousand times yes!"

Lunara just as dramatically placed a hand over her heart, sniffling. "Thank you! I promise to make you a happy woman!"

As they both stood up chattering and laughing away, preparing for the thrill of adventure ahead, Lunara noticed she was missing her coin pouch.

"Have you seen my coin pouch? I could've sworn I had it tied tightly around my waist, so there's no way it could've fallen off after the nautiloid crash." Lunara questioned as her purple eyes darted around their surroundings, ash and smoke rising from all the debris.

"Perhaps it burned away from the flames of the crash." Mon'sun replied smoothly, helping Lunara seek for her humble riches.

(Pssst, Mon'sun is lying and has Lunara's pouch in her pack, but she rolled a Nat 20 on ✨️deception✨️ sooo...)

"Well, nevermind then!" Lunara shrugged, smiling. "I'm sure our Lady of Silver will grant us great blessings for our journey. In fact, she has already bestowed upon me a most wonderful blessing in the form of a kind, trustworthy new friend!"

Narrator: *As the two drow kin embark on their perilous quest to free themselves of their parasites, a haunting voice echoes deep within the recesses of Mon'sun's mind; her own parasite. One of a different, godly breed taunting her--tormenting her.*

"Do you wish to find comfort in the presence of another inferior god, spiderling?" Lolth cackled, cruel music flooding Mon'sun's ears, vicious mockery only she can hear. "Such foolishness will only bring about disappointment...much like your new companion. But I am here, spiderling. Always watching. It is only a matter of TIME for you to bathe in her blood."

Mon'sun abruptly stopped in her tracks, shutting her eyes tight, nails digging into the palms of her hands that nearly drew blood as she willed the spider goddess to not so kindly fuck off. She was used to this by now, the lure of Lolth's appalling temptations always merciless, sickening, and...gratifying.

But no. She will never ever give in. Absolutely fucking NOT!

"Are you alright, Mon'sun?"

Mon'sun's eyes snapped open, sweat beading down her temple and wide, frantic eyes landing on Lunara, a few feet in front of her staring at her in concern.

"...I forgot!" A beat too late, a beat too nervous. But thankfully, Lunara didn't seem to notice it, only watching in curiousity as Mon'sun rummaged through her pack that was literally ripping off the seams.

Mon'sun then procured a small purple pouch, smiling sheepishly as she handed it to Lunara.

"Apologies, friend. I stole picked this up earlier and just remembered it now. This must be yours, yes?"

Lunara caught Mon'sun completely off guard when she launched herself at the other girl, wrapping her arms around Mon'sun.

"Oh, our Lady of Silver truly blesses me! Thank you, friend, your kindness knows no bounds!" Lunara giggled.

Mon'sun was still for a few moments before returning the embrace, laying her head against Lunara's chest. Her bardic ear listened close, the faint thrum of Lunara's heartbeat--as lovely as its owner--lulling her to a wonderful sense of security.

No matter how temporary.

#Baldur's Gate 3 #BG3 #Gifts for Bob #Lunara Posting #Mon'sun

[hoseokslefteyebrow]

007

Pairing : Miguel O' Hara X Reader

Genre : Angst, violence

Summary : The people who broke into your apartment take you. Miguel sure as hell won't let them keep you. 

Wordcount: 1.4k

Trigger warning¿: Violence, Miguel tears through skin like it's paper, Reader is injured

- Previously; Someone had broken into Miguel his best friend's apartment, yours. He doesn't understand why, or who, but he's pretty content with the current situation. You living with him. Now things have changed, he's finally owned up to his feelings, and the two of you have moved into a beautiful penthouse. Or see 004, 005 & 006-

[ A/N: Special thanks to @dammittjanet for helping me out with this chapter < 3.]

Miguel O'Hara Masterlist

It happens when he least expects it.

You're returning from hanging out with your friends when you're taken. Miguel has no time to guess who had been targeting you anymore. Time is expensive now.

He's a complete and utter mess, uncharistic chaos following his every move. HQ has become a bit of a mess. Most have been told to remain focused on the multiversal anomalies, but Miguel has kept Peter B and Jessica aside to help him find you.

So far, there has been no luck in finding you. And Miguel's anger is increasing by the second. He's barking orders left and right to Layla. He's surprisingly not barking orders at Jessica and Peter,  grateful for their help, though he doesn't voice it.

He just hopes he gets to you soon before anything horrible happens.

-

When you wake, you're not where you're supposed to be. You had been on your way home. And this isn't the still relatively new penthouse you had moved into recently with your boyfriend.

" Y/N L/N." A taunting voice calls out.

You turn your head to face the sound, and come face to face with a stranger you have no knowledge of.

" Who are you?" Your voice is strong.

You're scared out of your mind, but you'll be damned to show that.

The man stood a few steps across from u laughs. A little too loudly for your comfort. 

" My, girl. It's not important who I am. But tell me. Who are you? And what is your relationship with Miguel? " 

You glare at him. He doesn't like that. With a few steps, he walks up to you, roughly grabbing your cheeks and squeezing them together with one hand. 

" You better start talking, woman. You won't like what I'll do to you if you do not. " He tells you. 

You can't help the shiver that goes down your spine, but nonetheless, you try to stay strong. 

" Yeah, well, you won't like what he'll do to you if you as much as touch me. " You glare. 

The man scoffs. 

" Bold assumption to assume that he'll actually find you." The man sneers. 

Your glare only deepens. 

Suddenly, the door to your right opens, and a vaguely familiar man steps through. 

" Tyler Stone? " Your mouth falls open slightly, your lips parted in surprise. 

The man has the audacity to laugh. Waving off the stranger, Tyler takes his place in front of you. You never liked Miguel's father for what he had put him through. 

" Y/N. Thank you for remaining as friends with Miguel. Thanks to you we're finally going to get what we want. " He grins. 

You furrow your brows. 

" Haven't you bothered Miguel enough? I'd advise you to let me go. He's not going to spare you again. " 

Your fear lessens by the sight of this man. Literally everyone else you'd be afraid of, but you know that Miguel would make this man and his goons pay the ultimate price for messing with the two of you. 

Tyler chuckles. 

" Yeah well, let's just hope he'll find you alive first. Now, tell me. I know that he has access to the multiverse. Tell me how. "

You swallow. 

-

Time passes by quicker than Miguel likes it to go. Before he knows it, two days have passed. Whoever is holding you captive must be very intelligent or close to the society. 

" Miguel I found something. " Layla suddenly pops up beside him. 

She's been keeping her eyes on the security cameras in the city, keeping an eye out for anything that could've been related to you. 

" Show me. " He tells her. 

His posture is tense, he's stood in front if the screens as he always is, with his arms crossed over one another and a finger tapping away at his chin. 

Sure enough, Lyla pulls up a few security cams of two days ago, late in the afternoon. It follows a black car that flies through until it eventually stops in front of a building. Just like the other buildings of his world, it's sleek, and modern. But he doubts the inside will be pretty. 

With a sigh, Miguel straightens up. 

" Call Jess and Ben. "

" You don't want me to call Peter as well? "

" No. "

-

Your body hurts. Your face is bruised, you're pretty sure you've broken a rib by now, and you're as hungry as you are thirsty. Your stay here has been anything but pleasant so far. And you can't wait for it to end. 

You can't wait for Miguel to come and save you. Although you're in a lot of pain, you're not hopeless. You still believe that he'll come to save you. And on top of that, you believe he'll make these people pay. 

Much to Tyler and his goons displeasure, you haven't spoken a word about how to acquire multiversal travel. 

" Listen up, useless excuse for a woman. I am done with you and your shitassery. Tell us how-"

He's interrupted by a loud slam of the door. 

" Boss! He's here. And he's not alone. "

" What do you mean he's not alone? "

With an angry groan, Tyler follows the man out the door, and through the hallway. 

You try to move, to escape, to be useful, anything. Every movement makes you hiss as it passes through your ribs. You had managed to loosen the restraints on your first day, and now was the moment to loosen it all the way. 

As expected, your restraints fall to the ground. With a groan, you untie your feet as well, before getting up. 

You're feeling extremely weak. The pain and lack of water and food in your system setting you up to faint. You push the feeling down. Now is the time to escape. 

To your luck, the door is unlocked, and right outside lies a baton. Why? You don't know. But you're very grateful for whoever left their mess lingering around. 

Following the noise, you find yourself in a room with Tyler, his goons, Miguel, Jessica and Ben. The fight between them is already raging as you arrive. Miguel looks downright feral, using his claws for something other than climbing (and ruining) walls. He's merciless, ripping through the goons like they're worth nothing. Ben is talking nonsense while wrapping up people left and right, while Jessica is doing the same, without talking nonsense. 

For a moment, you just stand there. Breathing heavily, not knowing what to do. 

" The girl! " One of the goons suddenly calls out, noticing you. 

Your eyes widen, before they fill up with rage. They've had their turn hurting you. Now you'll return the feeling. You do feel a sweat break out as three dudes turn to you instead of one. 

Thankfully, Jessica appears to have beard him as well, as she turns to your aid quickly. Alongside her, you beat one of them (with a great amount of effort and the last bits of energy you have left,) while she takes down the other two. 

From the corner of your eye, you see Miguel tear through Tyler, speaking words to him you can't seem to process anymore. 

Once the three men are taken down, you collapse. Your lack of nutrients and water not allowing you to do more. 

You vaguely process Jess catching you, and the sound of Miguel calling your name. 

[ A/N: It took a while, but it's finally here! 1 or 2 more chapters/shots for these two and we're through. ]

008

000-009¿ - Taglist

@adamsloverboy @ihateuguys @alchemist421 @julesclues @bxrbiewrites @dammittjanet @lady-necromancer @gaspyghosttt @scarletsloveletter @okkotszn @zayxcc @scoliobean @spiritndrain @narmothewraith

#idkeitherman #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara fanfic #spiderman across the spider verse #miguel o'hara x reader #x reader #spider man 2099 #miguel o' hara x you

[monstaxdirtywonk]

Heaven is a place in hell with you.

Member: San as Hades x Reader Persephone

Plot: It's not the typical myth although it does share some similarities I've made some changes too to fit what I had in mind.

Genre: Angst, Fluff and eventual smut (not in this chapter)

Endless darkness. That's all his eyes have been seeing for the eternity of time. If only someone could imagine the depth of time combined with the depth of the darkness, they'd lose their sanity. Being a God grants you great power but being the God of the dead might not be seen as attractive as other God's kingdoms. Poseidon, ruling the vast sea or Zeus, ruling the mortal world. But death is the most powerful of all, Hades thinks, for it holds the power to diminish everything else. Whether someone was rich, privileged or one of a kind, after their passing, they are just part of the soul parade, a group of shadows with no purpose, just lurking around till the dawn of time. Maybe even after that. Hades has a bit of a reputation if you will, hated by most, if not all the living. The God's aren't fond of him either. He is too monotonous for their liking, keeps mostly to himself, he is on his own, just like what he rules, a lonely experience by default. His body is as immortal as it can be, a vast contrast between his surroundings. He stood tall and proud, well shaped and proportionate. His face chiseled and enigmatic, his prominent bone structure and intense gaze making him intimidating in a striking way. Appearance wise he looked no older than 25, but his soul felt awfully old. Maybe others were right to despise him. He can't stand himself either at times. A gloomy haze was his life, that seemed to have no end.

"A girl is playing around the lake, Lord" Thanatos, his trusted winged friend mentioned.

"She comes here often. She doesn't look human, but not godly either. More like a mixture of them too, not ordinary enough for a mortal, not divine enough for a goddess".

Hades decided to take a closer look after Thanatos' description. He is someone that likes to keep his thoughts and opinions independent, but he couldn't agree more. Her beauty was like something he'd witness before and something entirely different, all at the same time. She appeared delicate and gentle, her hands brushing through the bush, as the wind blew against her face. She seemed beautiful, but in a very different way than Aphrodite is. He didn't feel an ounce of lust for her, her vibes innocent and pure, almost angelic. The type of person you want to protect with your life, if he even had such a thing.

"Maybe she is a nymph? But she is someone I've never seen before and I keep up with them to say the least" Thanatos laughed, confirming his womanizer nature.

Hades laughed as well. His friend had a charm that drew others to him. Maybe they liked getting a taste of death while still alive, literally.

"That's true, you'd know her by now. I'm sure Artemis despise you, my friend. You are ruining chaste virgins left and right."

"Well what can I say? I'm popular with the ladies. I guess they might have a thing for my wings? I mean there aren't that many of us, even in the immortal world. But speaking of getting down and dirty, you haven't been laid in such a long time, Hades!"

The latter's eyes grew at the realization. He had some needs but they never bothered him to that extent. Keeping busy did the trick so far and he was more of an old fashioned man to say the least. His mistress was the night but he grew sick of her. They were too similar, he thought. He wanted some light to enter his world, a blinding brightness to shake him up and warm his icy heart. Or at least that was his persona, his mask. He knew, better than anyone, how much he felt and loved and longed for it. But he could wait for that, he had time, that's for sure.

"Mind your business boy" he said in a teasing tone but failed at intimidating his friend. Hades looked dark, dangerous even, until he became familiar to you. Once you made a place for yourself in his heart, he couldn't be further from that.

"Okay okay, I was just saying that it's a pity for you to go like that. But whatever makes you happy." He answered and raised both of his arms in a defeating manner. Thanatos knew that he was basically a brother to Hades, but he still wanted to keep their relations good, because he had the tendency to say more than he should.

"It's all good, I'm just teasing you!" Hades smiled his way and showed his dimples, the sweetest sight his kingdom had to offer.

Thanatos smiled back and took a look at the lake again, which they were able to see from the inside, as it was the main portal for the underworld. His smile quickly turned sour, and worry played over his handsome features.

"What is it?" Hades asked.

"The girl...seems to be in danger". Thanatos pointed out and Hades took a closer look. A wolf was some meters away from her, moving eerily elegantly for such a creature. Given the area the lake was, it seemed unlikely for an actual wolf to be there. It's size was extraordinary large too, all this made him believe it was one of Zeus' tricks again. A sudden surge of protective energy took over him and he wanted to save this poor girl from Zeus. She didn't deserve Hera's wrath either. None of them did. Hades took a hold of his scepter and pushed it on the ground. The lake started waving and it turned dark as if it was raining during a perfectly sunny day. The girl gasped at the sight in front of her and took a step back since she was almost right next to the lake by now. The waters were divided and a set of stairs showed up. When Zeus realized that the girl was about to escape, he started running towards her and she felt such an overwhelming fear that made her run without even realizing that this was probably a bad idea. She followed the stairs which turned to water again after each of her steps. As soon as she touched the ground, she broke down in tears and hid her face inside her hands, too scared to open them and face her destiny. But sometimes our destiny isn't as scary as we think it is, because there, in this dark and seemingly unwelcome world, she'd find a man with no soul, but more capacity to love than anyone else with a soul ever could.

Next chapter:

#ateez #ateez san #ateez san fluff #ateez san smut #ateez san angst #ateez san imagine #ateez smut #ateez fluff #ateez angst

[haggishlyhagging]

At the Gathering, we spoke of affirmation as recording over the old tapes patriarchy set playing in our heads to maim and incapacitate us when we were born female—tapes that for many women have been playing continuously and almost exclusively ever since. Operating on this assumption, we thought it was necessary for the message we record over those old tapes to be extravagantly positive, extravagant enough to drown out and drive out the loud, lying, over-learned message underneath. This meant that it wasn't enough to say, "I'm smart." To contradict with strength the feeling of stupidity with which patriarchy has so undercut our confidence, we encouraged one another to say things such as, "I'm absolutely brilliant!" Or, as one woman shouted, "I'm a fuckin' genius!" Our theory was that our ugly, destructive feelings could only be swept away by hyperbole, by superlatives, by very vigorous, very intense language. Words are congealed energy. By controlling our language, men have sucked our energy from us, the energy of our belief in ourselves. Using passionate, puissant words could give us back some of that stolen energy. "So let's use them!" I encouraged everyone. "The biggest, most vivid, most luscious, gorgeous, lavish, radiant, stunning words in any language to describe and heal ourselves."

And women did: I am riotously fun to be with! I am completely lovable just as I am! I am a hell of a leader! I am a brilliant star! I am absolutely gorgeous! I am in complete control of my life! I am totally self-confident! I am an incredibly important person! I am a winner!

Because we taught affirmation as fabulous accounts of our genius and beauty, some women worried about the literal "truth" of our statements. We answered that the feeling we were seeking by affirming ourselves is the truth. Whatever we must say to gain a true feeling was true. To say "I'm a genius," to affirm that, to insist on it, to shout it, may not make me feel like a genius, but it will certainly give me the feeling of being not stupid, perhaps even of being intelligent. And that I am intelligent, that we are all intelligent, is the absolute truth.

Since we knew the women couldn't get together often, we urged them to affirm themselves alone and in small groups. "Each one of us," I told them, "every morning when we awake, should go to the mirror, look ourselves lovingly in the eye, and brag aloud to ourselves about ourselves, something like:

"Good morning, Sonia. How did you get so beautiful? Did you practice all night? Just look at your lovely eyes, brimming with wisdom and humor, with all those gorgeous wrinkles around them. You look vital and healthy and alive—perfect! I'm so glad to be you! So brilliant and funny, playful, passionate, and dedicated. I'm proud at how well you've supported yourself and your kids for so many years in the insecure career of freelance feminist. You're something of a marvel, dear friend, and I love you very much. Never forget that you can always count on me, no matter what. Now go and have a wonderful day. No one ever deserved it more!"

I often suggested to women in other audiences during that time period that since we are the stuff myth is made of, we should create epics, sagas, legends of our victories, our gifts, our incredible lives; in speech and writing and song rhapsodize about ourselves. Just to show how easy it is to do, and to demonstrate how not to care what our paeans sound like to others (and to remind myself how marvelous I am), I occasionally took something I love about myself and mythologized it off the cuff right there at the podium:

"As women are wont to think of our gifts, I once thought of my gift to speak as something independent of me, something that was only using me as a vehicle. But no more. This gift is me, nothing separate. It is attached to my flesh, flows in my veins and arteries, with my blood infuses every organ, every muscle, every cell. It comes out of my life, out of who I was before I was born, out of the longings of my soul, out of the passion of my heart. I am a voice for women—for my sisters, my loves—who have no voice, to whom no one listens. From 5000 woman-years of rage to be free, my voice soars. When I speak, I speak out of the lustiness of my woman's body and mind, out of all women's richest womanhood combined. My whole soul is full of language to honor women's wondrous ways. When I speak of women I am a bird flying, a tree standing against the storm, a dolphin dancing in the sea. When I speak I am all women who ever lived loving me. I feel their smooth arms and tangled hair. I smell their lemony fragrance, taste the tears on their cheeks, kiss their sweet smiles. When I speak I am diffuse—all women of all times. When I speak I am one individual woman, a particular woman. When I speak, I know my name. I know who I am."

I believed then, and still believe, that since we have been so diminished, so inexpressibly smallened and uncreated by phallocracy, we have both an obligation now and the unparalleled opportunity to create ourselves, paint ourselves onto the global canvas with boldest, broadest strokes, most brilliant colors; to portray ourselves as giants, collossi—magical, incandescent, powerful almost beyond imagining—lifting the world out of misery in our hands mighty with love. Goddesses together.

-Sonia Johnson, Going Out of Our Minds: The Metaphysics of Liberation

#sonia johnson #affirmations #self confidence #self esteem #feminist spirituality #i am my own goddess

[fiction-justanotherstateofmind]

Here I'll write the comments as I watch the new Teen Wolf movie, so SPOILERS!!

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SPOILER

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1) WTF! Why would you keep a evil spirit IN A RESTAURANT?! Easily accessible to anyone. And what if you open the wrong jar while cooking?!

Unbelievable.

2) All the Scott's first scene... kinda cringe

3) I'm not gonna lie, I missed the intro song 🎶

4) I've never heard Deaton speak so much (and for my Italian friends: lo vedo un po' sciupato)

5) Derek, my beautiful love! And hello, Stiles and Derek's son (called like Stiles' grandfather, Elias. iykyk)

6) Why do they talk about the Nemeton like they don't know it?

7) I love Derek as a dad. My heart is melting.

8) Parrish and Malia don't make any sense.

Update from the end of the movie. Ok, I kinda like them, but they still don't make any sense.

9) Apparently Deaton can fight now. Plus every time I see the nogitsune all I can see is this:

10) For a moment I thought I was watching the Winx... I guess some things never change. I surely didn't miss the bad special effects.

And why does everyone needs to be naked??

11) OMG!!! VICTORIAAA. This woman scares me even now

12) I've always dislike Allison, now even more: my poor poor Derek! 😭

Ok no, false alarm, but I don't change my opinion.

I really love Dad Derek btw.

13) I missed Peter and Chirs together. My other ship

14) Scott to Eli: "Find your dad". What if instead you tell him where his dad is too, since you do know Derek is at home but Eli doesn't *facepalm pt.2*

15) The parallel between Dark Allison and Scott and Dark Allison and her killing spree against my precious Erica and Boyd. YOU SEE WHY I DON'T LIKE HER?! (She didn't even say sorry for that btw)

16) The Sheriff killing Oni while sitting on the couch is on another level

17) Derek dies pt.2 (my heart can't take it anymore)

18) What?! Why, tell me why did you run against theirs swords. You literally killed yourself, Eli. *facepalm pt.3*

19) Peter, that was cringe af. And Chris wdym with 8 hours at most when we know from the show that it takes about 24h before the death?? Omg I can't with this movie

20) And now why do they care about the game? Hello, your father's going to die, Eli!!

21) Oh, she's really doing it. I didn't expect it (Allison shooting at Scott)

22) Ouch, that must hurt (Nogitsune with a new hole in the middle of his forehead)

23) I missed Chris and Peter's duo, but please give me back Peter's old hair style, this one is a death crime

24) Jackson my beautiful little lizard. I've always loved you ♡

25) How disgusting! It's like Rufus (from Kim Possible) became the Darach:

Do you se the resemblance too? Unfortunately I don't have a photo of the nogitsune unmummified.

26) The scene is kinda cheap but gods if I missed them

27) Why are Derek's eyes blue?? They were yellow again after the the Mexican fountain of youth

Update: nevermind. They reminded me that after Derek evolves his eyes go back to blue.

28) Can anyone stay dead in this city?? Harris too, come on!

29) You're giving your son TO SCOTT?? Are you serious, Derek?? It's like a big child, he can't take care of Eli. If Stiles was there, he would tell you the same (but if Stiles was there, Eli would be with his other dad -Stiles- so Scott wouldn't be even an option but I stand for my objection)

30) HIS EYES!! HIS EYES TURNED RED LIKE A TRUE ALPHA (btw, Derek, you've always been the alpha to me)

31) They've vanished. No corpse no death. And even then, we're in Beacon Hills so what is one more resurrection, right? Right??

32) SCOTT, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!! YOU'RE IN YOUR 30s, ALLISON IS STILL 16/17!

And why are you kissing anyway! Derek's dead*! (*to them, 'cause in reality Derek's alive, safe and sound. I know it)

33) Excuse me, can I see at least one tear for Derek Sourwolf Hale, please? Are y'all being serious? Scott is almost smiling!!

Also, they had a funeral for Derek but didn't invite Cora, his sisters... they didn't even tell Isaac that Allison is alive (you know, Allison, your boyfriend. I know you kinda forgot him even when you were dying but if you remember everything then Isaac is supposed to be in that everything too). They didn't even call Stiles!

35) Why does it seem that when the Sheriff was talking about the jeep he was actually talking about Stiles and Derek (or sterek as a ship/concept). No matter what, we sterek shipper will stand. Always and forever.

Final thoughts

I thought worse but at the same time it felt rush. I wanted to see more Eli and Malia bonding. Also the way the Sheriff cares about Eli it seems more like a grandfather to a grandson (if you know what I mean) but we couldn't really see that. And can we talk about Derek and Noah (John for the friends)'s partnership? Or how Derek speaks about Stiles with Noah as he's still in touch with him??

And where is Eli come from anyway?! Are we finally normalize mpreg?

Final final thoughts

I didn't like this movie. It was like a big bad Scallison fanfiction found on wattpad (ao3 is better). A lot of things were forgotten and other changed.

BUT

There's always a but (as in the Derek's "death" *wink wink*).

This movie gave us a lot of sterek material.

I'm afraid of what Jeff Davis' mind could possibly come with for another movie, probably more about Eli's past which means a mother for sure (unfortunately the world isn't ready for mpreg yet I'm afraid) and less sterek material. But at the same time I want to see Derek alive again, I want to see how they would manage with two true alpha and how Derek and Eli's relationship would evolve.

I want a lot of things to see but I'm afraid they won't give me any of them, so I can't decide either I want another movie or not.

What do you think?

#teen wolf #stiles stilinski #derek hale #sterek #stiles x derek #gif #dylan o'brien #teen wolf movie #teen wolf the movie #scallison #teen wolf movie reaction #derek is alive I know it #werewolves #werewolf #elihale #eli is stiles and derek's son

[eph-em-era]

When I was at high school we did a version of Joan of Arc that was set at the end of the world. A dystopia, about a burning world and royalty and love. That play would have probably done damn well with a non-binary Joan actually, because so much of that narrative was about bodily autonomy, about being forced to be impregnated, to carry on the population. About forced femininity. A Joan who doesn't feel right in their own skin already, even before the whole dystopia thing - it would have worked.

I'm saying this cause this story has been adapted for years and will continue to be adapted long after you're gone. There's been at least seven films and presumably countless other pieces of media about her.

Hamlet, Othello, Lear, Macbeth, Malvolio, kings and queens, Alexander the Great, Cleopatra, Coriolanus. Royalty, historical icons, real or not. They've all been queered or cross-cast. All their stories have been told in beautiful, different, interesting ways - ways that have unlocked discussion, created different narratives, explored their worlds in a way that makes them feel more alive than just some sentences on a page. How does Malvolio become more sympathetic as a woman? What does queering do to the story of Macbeth? What happens if Puck is non-binary?

Adaptation brings stories back to life, and reignites passion in a subject.

Hell, I've played a crosscast Prospero on stage. Taking a role that's historically masculine and splitting it between two (then) cis-identified woman actors? That's giving characters layers you didn't expect.

I, Joan is not erasing the historical woman. It's providing a different angle on the story. Y'all sound like those guys who get mad when there's a lead woman in a video game by whining about the character using they/them pronouns and having complicated gender feelings. Oh no, one portrayal of a person is doing a different thing? Shock horror. The world's going to end. Fucking get over yourselves.

No real person ever is going to google Joan of Arc and think "omg she was non-binary" because of this play. it's not erasure, it's adaptation. it's expression, it's THEATRE, not the real world. it's not "literally 1984". - because a) most of yall who say something's like 1984 have never read it, and b) people aren't trying to tell you that Joan of Arc wasn't a cis woman. They're saying "if you think the abstract concept of Joan being non-binary is interesting, come and see this play". And I do. I find that idea very interesting.

If anything, a young person seeing this play could very easily become interested in the real Joan of Arc's story and seek it out after seeing the play.

Adaptation breeds discussion and creativity. It interests audiences in things that they mightn't have cared about. I'm not going to see a play about my hometown's history because I don't really care about it, but I'd see a play that discusses the queer icons that grew up here, cause there's something relatable to latch onto.

TERFs, radfems, whatever the fuck you call yourselves now - you're not helping. You're not making theatre better or art better or making the world safer or standing up for women, you're harming people.

Cis women get thrown out of toilets all the time because y'all get in a moral panic about tiny genetic factors - shapes of noses, length of hair, omg she has broad shoulders thus she must be a trans spy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - and trans and cis people die because you see gender as a strict line rather than a series of complicated biological factors that have always been more than just two options.

Get the fuck over yourselves. Stop whining and clothing your rhetoric in proto-fascist buzzwords.

With this much internet attention, the show's going to sell out anyway. :) In theatre, any publicity is good publicity, and I certainly hope it gets a repeat season and a digital release.

#i joan #terf #radfem #joan of arc #theatre #globe theatre #and before you all send me death threats like you usually do #doing that is proving my point

[weirdlizard26]

i had the most BIZARRE dream today.

kabru and laios were alone in a big dungeon room bc the rest of the party (what party??? nobody knows) went off to do some recon or whatever and they were just having a pleasant chat when SUDDENLY laios whips out a knife and stabs kabru's hands to the wall??? and then he said "so YOU did this to my sister." supposedly referring to the stabbing and looking at him with his big ol eyes. but kabru ripped the knife out and slashed laios with it!!! and he said something like "i know what you are!" and then they fought for a while until kabru cut his left arm off with the knife (????) and as laios staggered kabru stabbed him in the chest, killing him.

and he was like phew finally thats done! and then laios' body started moving weirdly and started growing and turned into a giant dragon :)c for some reason in my head i called him the red dragon but he was actually like. this dark reddish purple! and anyways he started attacking kabru in his dragon form and kabru TRIED to fight off but it was pointless and dragon laios killed him,,, and then he. also died again?...

and then there was a fast forward sequence and there they were, alive again, with their respective parties (although idk who was in kabru's party, it was really blurry). they were all sitting in a tavern, the two parties at different tables, and laios had this beautiful long messy hair. he was still reeling after the resurrection and said something careless and rude to someone passing by and that person tried to pick a fight with him for it AT WHICH POINT kabru got up and told that person to go to hell. which in my dream implied that everything ended well and they reached some kind of understanding? and they exchanged these sympathetic looks with each other and it was like. oh theyre gonna work together from now on...

and then it cut to a secret room deep in the dungeon and it had this beautiful vegetation and a shiny waterfall (even though there was no clear source of light) and in the center of it all stood an elven woman and she said "come to me my child". and then it cut to chimera falin perking up miles away and there was a montage of her traveling through the dungeon to get to this woman. and she clung to this woman carefully and the woman said "go find them" with a stern expression and falin tried to hug her or something and generally regarded her as a mother? but this lady literally shoo'ed her away and falin was off,,,

#wl26 #anyways #i woke up IN my dream and was holy shit. that dunmeshi ep was awesome i cant believe they turned laios into a dragon

[cljordan-imperium]

What are your character's and those names' special meanings?

Okay, go get a drink...and a snack..because this is going to take a little bit. There are a lot of them. *laughs* I'm actually going to end with @theimperiumchronicles rather than start with it.

@the-andromeda-effect

Caliban - in Romanian it means "Black", was also a savage and feral man in the Tempest. Caliban is the head of a crime family and a a highly adept assassin known for his brutality and feared for it.

Riona - means Queenly. As Riona Kalavati, she was the wife of the head of a crime family and was their "Queen", even if her husband didn't treat her that way

Adira - strong, noble, powerful. Being rescued from her ex-husband and forming the relationship with Caliban, she discovers her strength. She is an elegant and proud woman, and now that she has a husband that supports her, she will gain confidence. In coming into the operations of his enterprises, she will gain power.

Theron - hunter. Theron is Caliban's attorney and his best friend. He is the one that he turns to when information and people need to be found, or they need to be stopped the legitimate way.

****

@tapperhet-em

Einar - battle leader/warrior. He was a knight in Meeri's father's army. A soldier. And now in the small band keeping Meeri alive and trying to figure out who betrayed her family, he often takes the role of leader, especially when it comes to her.

Meeri - pearl. Delicate, beautiful, elegant, and precious are all words that describe a pearl and Meeri, at least her friends would tell you that. And just like opening an oyster can lead to the surprise of finding a pearl, her friends never expected when they were assigned to guard a princess that they would find such a loyal and valuable friend.

Tieran - lord. Tieran is landed gentry, like all of the other males. So, if he were to take over any of his family's property, the meaning would be quite literal - he would be Lord of the Manor.

Elio - sun. Elio is normally the brigher one, the one that lifts everyone else's spirits and sees the positive when they are facing hardships. He is the one that the others also often turn to when they are needing advice and counsel, as he does not just see the darkness around them, but can find the good in a situation as well

Lorcan - fierce on. Lorcan is just that. He was an MP, a Srgeant, a leader. Not to mention his dog has literally bitten enemies' faces off. While all of the men are soldiers and knights, it is Lorcan who is capable of the most violence and will not hesitate to unleash hell to defend his friends.

****

@devil-in-the-details-ay

Astaroth - Astaroth is traditionally considered a Great Duke of Hell, so it seemed natural that he could be Death. So I just used him. It gave me ready made sigils and a backstory. Astaroth in most mythos does not have a designation for what he was a demon of. HOWEVER...the Greek meaning of his name is "loved of God" regardless of the religious connotations...and that will become important. ;)

Yara - butterfly. OOOOOOoooooo....this one I can't tell the total meaning because I do not want to spoil it for one of my readers. BUT, I can say that her name ties into her her REAL mother is. She was named by her mother and the butterfly is important. (if you think you know, please message because I do have a couple readers who don't want spoilers)

Tarek - morningstar/bright star. Yara's REAL brother. Egyptian and the scarab is his personal insignia because the scarab is the representation of the morning sun. The sun is a star, so...it goes with his name. Like a bright star in the darkness, once he is found by Astaroth and Yara, he will help to guide her into becoming who she was always meant to be and leaving her painful past behind. They will all three have a very close relationship.

****

@magical-mistakes-vm

Vollrath - all strength or counsel. He is head of the Coven. He is a strong and fair leader, and who other warlocks and witches come to when they need help. His strength is physical, mental, and magical.

Mahala - tenderness. Mahala is the other side of the coin to Vollrath. Where he is bold and strong, she will be soft and gentle. Together, they will be unstoppable. Each possesses the qualities the other lacks, and they complement one another perfectly. They just have some bumps to work out first.

Baldur - lord or prince. He is Vollrath's second in command, so this would fit. There is also a meaning of "hero" which also could be said to fit later on in the story with what is coming, but again NO SPOILERS. :)

Elmar - noble. Like Baldur, he is Vollrath's second in command, so if it were a royal court, this would apply

Balor - the deadly one. Vollrath's brother is darker, and actually more powerful than he is. He is also the one that is more likely to kill first and use a necromancer to ask questions later. Which one of the brothers wants to keep Mahala alive more might be a tough competition.

Nachtnebel - night fog. Balor and Vollrath's last name. They are dark, at times mysterious, and there are secrets both hide.

Dunkelheit - the darkness. The name of the Coven. There is much that is going to come out as they go trough not only the mansion that was left to Mahala, but the one Balor lives in that is his family's. Secrets from the past are going to impact the present and reveal much about the true nature of the coven.

****

Princess of Thieves

Inara - "ray of light" and "heaven sent". If you ask Arik he'd say those describe her personally. He's stood in Diyan's shadow for his entire life, never feeling or having anyone special. Now that has all changed when he decided to help her escape the castle.

Arik - alone. While Arik and Diyan were friends, Arik now realizes that he was a means to an end to Diyan. He's really been alone his entire life and the more that sets in, the more he will struggle with accepting Inara, and also with his need to protect her at all costs.

Diyan - bright light. Diyan was the Prince, the heir to the throne, he outshone anyone around him. All of his friends were in his shadow at all times.

****

I am going to skip Behind These Masks and Bending The Law because there is no symbolism in those.

****

Abriella - One who is derived from God or the pillar of strength. Not sure I can add anything to that. I think it's pretty clear, and if you've read her stories you can see it.

Cruz - cross. He is a holy Nephilim and the Horseman of War. His ties to divinity are kind of obvious.

Deacon - helper or messenger. Of the Horsemen, Deacon is the most quiet. His nature is why he is helping Leandre with Yael.

Olly - warrior

Dezarius (Dez) - clever or star

Talon - Courageous

I could keep going, but there are over 100 and I have a meeting. I think you can see, none are on accident. Many in @theimperiumchronicles are biblical or canonical Catholic angels/demons like Raguel and Arioch, so their names and their purpose is canonical that way and I have modified their stories to fit mine.

Thank you for the question and I hope I didn't overwhelm you <3

#what my character names mean

[catchyhuh]

i like your pfp

but on a similar topic, what's your favorite design of the lupgang?

My favorite is usually just all of the shin lupin manga designs, because I'm biased as hell, but i am a fan of fuma, cagli, and dead or alive's style as well!

ty!! it's kind of funny, initially i was weary of the dead or alive designs but (as evidenced by the icon) THEY KINDA GREW ON ME! i imagine the fucking cool as hell animation and ole helped too BUT ANYWAY!! DESIGNS! IM GOING TO PUT MY ANSWER UNDER A CUT TO BE POLITE

okay my favorite lupin design. this one is probably the hardest because i love a lot of different ones for different reasons. i would say it's not a stretch to say lupin has the most consistent design across everything, and that's even compared to a guy who's face is half covered 90% of the time. um this is very basic but every time i like, envision the guy in my head, i'm thinking about part 2. his angles are sharp enough to convey that he's up to no good, but he's got huge expressive eyes without being too cutesy either. if p3 lupin is laffy taffy than p2 lupin is like. silly putty. moldable but slightly more solid. i think it'd be easier if i talked about lup designs i DIDN'T like but that's negative and we're talking POSITIVES. so yes. part 2.

for jigen i mostly base it off of his eyes. i collect jigen eye peek frames like they're pokemon cards. and based on that alone i'm half tempted to say det conan vs lupin but then i thought, hey, that might just be because. jigen was the main highlight of those for me. there's many good eye peeks so i have to observe all my collected studies. and then i went through everything and decided yeah this is probably still my favorite jigen. the insanely fluffy hair combined with the twice as spiky beard probably doesn't hurt in just creating a fun design either yknow

god picking one specific fujiko is ALSO going to be difficult because they literally just invent a completely new insanely beautiful woman every time. which is kinda the point but ANYWAY there's so many and i'm thinking like OH I LIKE THAT FUJIKO but only cuz of her hair. I LIKE THAT FUJIKO but i think it's just because this dress is pretty. stuff like that. so i went through my whole excessive catalog of screenshots and i think my answer is operation return the treasure. aside from just being a nice, if standard, design, i like the way she doesn't have drawn in pupils at some points, which is very small and subtle but kind of like. a visual shorthand to tell you something is Wrong with this woman and i love that! but my final answer is. so strange. it's this figure. this figure is THE fujiko to me. the sick as hell outfit, the charm, the way her smile is equal parts standard fujiko flirtiness but also looks like she's sincerely just in a happy mood. this fujiko ROCKS

goemon's design in princess of the breeze was kinda cute, like the middle point between his old look and the p4/p5 shorter haircut, and i also LOVE fuma but that's just because it's the quintessential goemon experience. i think my FAVORITE favorite is hemingway papers. he's so pretty but still Shaped and solid. a good balance of cool and mysterious but also silly enough to get in on the fun. plus he makes this face and that kinda automatically makes him the best

ok god help me i've been talking way too much about tokyo crisis i'm not going to talk about tokyo crisis. by this point as i'm writing this i've spent multiple hours going through all of the shit i've seen and making a mental list of all the best parts of each design and i've determined you can use the same basic design thirty times but it will FEEL different based on how you let their personality come through. so. because i'm forcing myself out of tokyo crisis mode. i think episode 0 is an ehh level special (with way too muted colors i should add) with a LETS GO!!! level zenigata. look at this guy! final answer: this guy.

#sorry this took a lot longer than such a simple question should've taken #i just have a LOTTA OPINIONS ON THESE GUYS AND HOW YOU CAN CONVEY A LOT OF INFO ABT THEM JUST AT A GLANCE!! #i initially was tempted to use this to talk about my favorite outfits they've worn too but no. too different. ill keep it concise. ish. #lupinions #asks

[messengerhermes]

Thinking a lot about that one post about "make your OCs a hotter cooler version of yourself" and I want to show y'all something:

I'm writing a novel right now that started as fanfic, but got so distant from the original source material I admitted to myself this story is now it's own beast. On the surface, it's erotica about polyamorous witches harnessing magic via BDSM. But it's also about taking your agency back from oppressive governments, family legacies, and your own traumatic past in order to become a more whole, alive version of yourself. These drawings are of one of the three main characters. On the left is how he starts the series, and on the right is how he ends it. He begins the first novel In a Bad Place. He's been exploited and institutionalized for several years and essentially turned into an instrument by having his own desires used against him. This has eroded his sense of self worth quite a bit and a lot of his arc in the first book is about relearning the basics of "you are allowed to say 'fuck that' about shit you don't want." By the third book, his arc becomes, "Living for yourself, even when it makes other people uncomfortable, does not make you selfish, or unworthy of the things you want." Now, none of my characters are complete self inserts, and none of them have the exact same problems I do. But one of the most effective ways I have found to write characters that feel real is to channel shit I've felt, gone through and experienced through another lens. So, Story Time: --CW: domestic abuse, emotional and verbal-- About two years ago, I got my shit together and left an abusive relationship that really devastated my self image and my ability to trust other people. My partner, who has a lot of trauma themselves and I think coped with that by being manipulative as hell, was very good at using my shame against me, and playing a game of ping pong with my emotions---I could rapidly go from their dream come true to the destroyer of their heart, often in the span of a few days, or even hours. In a single night, they could make fun of me for my gawkishness, my clothes, my inflamed skin, and also berate me for a stranger flirting with me without me catching it. --end the abuse bits-- It was rough.

Since leaving that relationship, I've been doing a lot of what I'd call, "catching up" in terms of owning my own dreams for myself and reshifting my life to put me at the center. It's been really difficult, especially as shitshows unexpected have made me a primary caregiver for an aging loved one. But it's also been incredibly freeing to let go of trying to be someone who is lovable and just loving myself. As I go through this novel, a lot of T's character growth stems from him needing to figure out what "being himself" looks like outside of being useful to someone else. Part of being himself includes taking care of his body. Traditionally, especially in romance genre work, I feel like the "glow up" a character whose struggled goes through is often about them getting more conventionally beautiful. For men, that often means getting leaner, more ripped, and more manly. But (as I've seen many folks on tumblr point out) often times healing means getting softer and yes, fatter. And that is beautiful too. This is a T4T4T love story, and the trans woman in this series starts the series fat and stays fat, and she is loved and desired the entire time. In T's case, he starts the series with a lot of chronic pain and fatigue, and while he is thin and muscular, he doesn't have stamina to really enjoy the things he used to love. Regaining weight over the course of the series is about him regaining connection with his body and strength. It also is him literally learning to take up space again in his life, regardless of what other people think of him taking up that space. (and yes, admittedly I do love men who are built like refrigerators, and writing what you love, especially in romance, I think is a key to making work that's enjoyable to read) And the funny thing is, writing T this way is helping me as I go through my own healing. My body has changed *a lot* thanks to choices I've made, and even as I feel the fear of "will anyone else want me" I am compelled by how much more comfortable I am in my body and how much I find myself desirable in ways I never did before. And writing a character going through similar changes, letting him get bigger and louder and bolder as the story goes on, and writing a life for him where that makes him more and more desirable to people around him, yes is a wish fulfillment fantasy. But also, it makes that fantasy feel much more possible. T is a weird little guy who loves bugs and carrion birds and scavengers and likes growing plants and singing offkey as he gyrates in his kitchen. He's kinda clammy all the time and his skin gets green around the edges and he's got a pudgy belly to match the thighs that wear through his jeans. He also knows who he is by the end of the series, in a way that makes him the sort of confident that gets beautiful people to sidle up to him from across a crowded room. He's also funny and caring and fun to be around in a way that makes his lovers travel across the country to get him back when he's snatched up from their bed. He's messy, and he's loved. Just as I wish to be. Just as I am capable of being. Just as you are capable of being. So I dunno, maybe have fun with your OC, let them be a hotter, cooler version of you. But don't let predetermined ideas of what hotness is control that. Dig around a little, push against the ways you've been shamed into feeling ugly. Feeling too much. Let your character be all those things you were made to feel embarassed about. Let them be that even more than you allow yourself to be. Then imagine a world where they're even cooler and sexier because of those things.

#writeblr #writerblr #hermes rants #stories #Kodd community if you think you recognize this guy you absolutely do #I did not try too hard here #my beautiful gremlin son rooting around in the underbrush for bugs #body image #weight gain

[viterbofangirllovestheuntamed]

*looks at pirate Jiang Chi* so his wife was the cultivation world's answer to Ching Shih then? or she was the leader of Jiang Shi's favorite port, Lotus Pier, and had her own group of feral land based rangers/bandits who wanted to set their lovely, grumpy leader up with the funny pirate captain bc they wanted a turn jumping off the plank while the pirate goblins were interested in the food and simping for the port leader laughing at their captain's attempts to woo the grumpy lotus lady

*heavy breathing* OH MY GOSH!!!! *incoherent screeching*

~~~PART ONE~~~

Jiang Chi considered himself a reasonable man.

For instance, the world was full of sorrows and tragedies, and the uncertainty of what one's own fortune might contain could kill a person as slowly and agonizingly as a long fever. Therefore, it was only reasonable to live each day as it it were your last, finding joy wherever possible and embracing challenges with open arms and an eagerness to conquer. Seeking out said challenges was also reasonable, as they couldn't be avoided anyway so what the hell, right?

There were other people like himself who simply couldn't bear the utter tedium of farming. Therefore, it was only reasonable that he gather such a group of like-minded people and carve out an alternative lifestyle for themselves. And Jiang Chi liked the water (especially the quick escape it offered), so building said alternative lifestyle around ships was certainly the most reasonable solution.

There were many things of beauty and value in this world that were hoarded by selfish men. Therefore, it was only reasonable that he liberate such treasures and redistribute them to parties that would appreciate them more, including parties that happened to be named Jiang Chi. And it was likewise reasonable to avoid killing those selfish men whenever possible, because then they'd be alive to gather more cool stuff for Jiang Chi to redistribute in the future!

His men---being pirates---must be able to react to unexpected conditions and be as at home in the water as on their ship. Therefore, it was only reasonable that he periodically shove members of his crew overboard from time to time. Laughing at them was also reasonable, as it encouraged camaraderie and assured his men that he wasn't mad at them even if he did think their reaction time was shit.

Yes indeed, it could not be argued but that Jiang Chi's reasonableness was immaculate and all-encompassing.

So as he stared at the arrow that had missed his ear by a literal hair---still quivering from where it was embedded in the mast---and let his gaze follow the projectile's trajectory to its origin to find the most no-nonsense, authority-reeking, bitchy-looking woman he'd ever seen standing on the nearby river shore, a lotus tucked behind her ear as she held her bow at the ready while a ragtag group of banditish-looking fellows held themselves at the ready behind her...

Well, it was only reasonable that he fell instantly, utterly, and irrevocably in love.

#Pirate King and Bandit Queen: A Tale of Yunmeng Jiang #yunmeng jiang #feral goblin rangers #jiang chi #jiang sect #headcanons #MOD'S STUFF #asks #ASK THE MOD #anons #ANON I AM GOING TO KISS YOU ON THE MOUTH #TO BE CONTINUED