#a lot of the time i can’t do that ie public transportation but it’s not the other person’s fault

[witchynyx]

Disabled Witchery

So for reference: I'm autistic, have ADHD/depression/anxiety/insomnia, and have mobility issues, chronic pain, chronic fatigue, and fibromyalgia.

My witchcraft is more recent than all of these (about 3yrs now), so I've not really adapted a practice to my limitations, but I've created my own practice which thus works around them. It's hard to know what qualifies as a 'hack' when you've never really known anything different, but I'm going to see what I come up with.

Timing is Flexible

I guess one of the things that makes the biggest difference for me is being flexible about time. Wanna do a full moon ritual but you just don't have the capacity to do so in the hour closest to its peak illumination? Anywhere within a few days is cool - I know considering 3 days as full (ie the night closest to 100% and the night either side, but some also consider 5 days (at which it's still 98%+ illumination), or even 7 (still over 95%)!

Likewise with your seasonal celebrations, it doesn't have to be on *the* date! Nature doesn't flick sudden switches between seasons, so the energy of a certain celebration or event doesn't suddenly appear and then disappear after 24 hours. There's often up to a week between the traditional and astronomical dates of the sabbats, and honestly, I'll do whatever I'm planning within up to a week either side of that. If there's a few things I want to do, they they don't all need to be done on the same day, either. You don't need to do everything at once, and you don't need to do them at the exact time/day.

You don't have to do All The Things!

I especially see the stress of this from younger and newer witches, but you really don't have to do everything. Sure, it might be nice to do an elaborate ritual every new moon, full moon, and sabbat, but that's a LOT! And that's even a lot for someone young, in good health, with lots of energy and minimal external commitments! Maybe you still want to observe all these, but all you can manage is 5min meditating near your window or lighting a candle to acknowledge these - that's rad, and totally counts!

Magic + Self Care = Win

Honestly there are so many books on how to inject magic into your self-care routine*, but witchcraft has literally been the best thing for my self-care game. Learning to connect with myself and the natural world around me has been the best thing I've ever done for my mental health. Plus it's an easy way to implement the things you're learning! I incorporate colour magic into my clothes/makeup selection, medical and magical herbalism both inform my tea selections, perfume and bath salt blends, and charm my food/drinks.

* My fave book on the topic so far is Light Magic for Dark Times by Lisa Marie Basile (she's also chronically ill).

Nature is Everywhere

I literally live in the very centre of my city - I can't drive, how much I can walk is pretty limited, and even spending much time on public transport wipes me out - but nature is still EVERYWHERE! Even excluding the herbs growing in pots on my balcony and and the pothos in my bookshelves, an urban space still has nature. Without leaving my apartment I can still see a few pigeons/crows/etc flying past occasionally, and a few paperbark trees, plus the roses and crepe myrtle in the garden of the old building across the road.

If you don't have 4 different species of street trees growing on your block or any parks/gardens nearby, what plants grow in abandoned spaces, or force their way through cracks in the concrete? What birds are around? Is anyone nearby growing plants in window boxes or balconies? Even on a terrible day, walking past the paperbark tree across the road when it's covered in flowers brings me a moment of joy.

Meditation Isn't That Hard...

... But it still kinda is. Literally the main purpose most folks are using meditation for is to train their focus. All that needs to be is picking a focal point (the breath is a common one, because it's always available) and focusing on it - your brain will absolutely wander from that, that's just when you gently nudge it back to your focal point. That's literally it! Over time, your brain will wander less often, and return back where you want it more easily. It's not supposed to be easy straight-up, otherwise there wouldn't be any benefit to it - it's a skill you practice to get better at, like any skill.

You don't need to sit any particular way - if you have pain/fatigue, you can lie down (just ideally somewhere you're not at risk of falling asleep), if you have ADHD or are otherwise hyperactive/easily bored, you can combine it with movement (stretching, walking, running, you can honestly meditate while smashing out your cardio at the gym). There's lots of ways you can adapt the basic premise, and it's totally fine to use guided meditations if you get caught up in your own mind and need external reminders to prompt you back to your focus.

ADHD Note: Meditation is literally THE most effective non-medication way to improve our focus! The down-side is that our brains are dopamine-deprived/seeking and meditation doesn't tend to give us that dopamine hit it wants, which can make the executive dysfunction a massive block to actually doing the thing. I'm pretty stuck here myself, particularly with my physical health stuff ruling out anything particularly physical/active.. I might need to see if I can find something high-dopamine to do afterwards as a bribe?

It's Okay to do Your Own Thing

Throw out any idea of what your practice "should" look like or include and just roll with what works. If you're physically disabled and struggle to leave the house, feeling like you need to do you rituals in a remote forest is probably going to mean you don't get to do many and then feel crap about yourself - craft a ritual you can do sitting in bed! If you're asthmatic, perhaps using candles, sprays, or bells would work better to cleanse your space than burning incense or herbs. If you have poor fine motor control or impaired vision, maybe you find it easier to record your journey digitally! Doing something "differently" and being able to do it is far better than doing something "properly" and just.. literally never being able to do it.

You're Not Alone

There are honestly SO many disabled, chronically ill, neurodivergent, and mentally ill witches out there. We're really often drawn to witchcraft, and there are some folks putting out some great resources on how they adapt their practice - like @heatherwitch's "Bedridden Witchcraft" series. Quite a few popular witchy authors are chronically ill as well, like Lisa Marie Basile, Juliet Diaz, and Arin Murphy-Hiscock. Don't let anyone tell you that your can't practice witchcraft unless you're physically and mentally well, it's bullshit, and we're all living proof.

#witchcraft #original content #witchynyx #disabled witch #chronically ill witch #neurodivergent witch #spoonie witch

[greenhappyseed]

BnHA Ch. 323 - parallels and comparisons

Most important thing first: Mic name-calls “Jeany” after Best Jeanist interrupts him and insults the UA teachers, saying the citizens find it hard to hear the truth from schoolteachers. Excuse me, PRESENT FUCKING MIC IS A PRO HERO WHO FOUGHT IN THE WAR AND ARRESTED THE DOCTOR. Ultimately, Jeany is trying to take responsibility, which is good, but the way he does it is insulting. Is that really how the Top 3 feel about the UA teachers? (This started out shitpost-y, but I think it does actually matter….)

On to Nezu, who, despite all his well-repressed rage, is still just a rat principal building a cage. He’s created an elaborate mecha-vault-campus to capture save humans and transport them around the country like Willy Wonka’s great glass elevator. Nezu says he did this on intuition, yet that can’t be the full story because his High Specs quirk gives him great insight into possible strategies the villains will use. In fact, the last time we saw his quirk in action, he was trapping 2 students in a maze, gradually blocking off all paths to the exit. Oh, and who else in BnHA is seemingly able to predict their opponent’s strategies and enjoys doing so? I’m not saying Nezu is “The UA Traitor,” particularly given his speech at the end of the chapter, but I AM saying there are parallels.

In particular, Nezu seems to do a lot of work related to quirk morality, while AFO refers to morals as mere fabrications.

Sticking with Nezu and jumping to the end of the chapter…this isn’t the first time he’s made a grand speech about UA students and the future. After DvK2, while Izuku and Katsuki are under house arrest, Nezu speaks to the school about All Might’s retirement and says how all of the students will “inherit this society.” The word “inherit” makes All Might think about his successor, and how Nezu reached out to him when he was searching in earnest (ie, when Nezu and Nighteye had Mirio picked out). Nezu’s “one step” language also ties back to an All Might monologue from the remedial course days — when Shoto, Katsuki, and the Shiketsu kids worked together to win tiny hearts AND All Might and Endeavor had their first real talk, leading Endeavor to reach out to Shoto.

Speaking of the remedial class moving forward, the Katsuki/Shoto “we are not friends” mutual side eye at the mention of Shiketsu is A Moment. Will the remedial foursome be trapped in an underground classroom!??!?

I think it’s clear that the heroes — pros, teachers, students — need to work together as one to win over “the citizens”. The heroes also need their supporters (hello kid in an All Might shirt!), parents (omg, Mitsuki holding Inko back from recklessly running into the crowd like the Midoriya she is!), friends, and rescued victims to take those steps to come forward. Izuku is moving forward for them, and they need to move forward for him.

I’m not convinced that Nezu’s “ultimate hero” is Izuku; it could be Katsuki, Ochako, Shoto, Mirio (hello underground permeation!), Shigaraki, Class 1A, or the entire “new generation”, judging by his “inherit” comment. Izuku is All Might’s chosen one to inherit OFA, but Izuku is NOT the only one inheriting society’s future. Special, but also not. (More on that later!)

Final bit on the mecha-school…I don’t think anything good in this series has come from being “underground”. I think we’ve already established that “underground” is neither safe nor invincible. Underground Yakuza compound. Underground prison. Underground hero (sorry Aizawa!!) Even when talking about the “ultimate hero,” Nezu speaks in terms of rising.

The text leaks said Eri was with Class 1B, which made me frustrated, but the panel is actually a lovely soft Monoma comforting her. It’s really sweet and shows off Monoma’s heroic heart! (And his off-duty fashion sense, because those buttons add some serious dramatic flair.) But, knowing that Aizawa, All Might, Mic, Thirteen, and the Big 3 are Eri’s usual caretakers makes me really sad for her — why are they ALL gone?? Especially when (1) she’s listening to a crowd call her personal hero a weapon with a cursed quirk, exactly how Chisaki used to talk about her; and (2) Izuku doesn’t HAVE to be the one taking care of her, but I think they’d both LIKE to see each other.

Speaking of the crowd, I do like having “the citizens” as a character. In the early chapters, we heard so much about protecting citizens and keeping society from falling into chaos, but it was all theoretical. With the jailbreak, the war destruction, and Dabi’s reveal, it’s good to see citizens who (1) question the value and robustness of the current hero society; and (2) are scared out of their minds. “The citizens” may be an obstacle for the heroes, but their fear and motivation is very rational under the circumstances. People who were forced to evacuate their home on short notice and hole up in a dormitory while skyscrapers crumbled due to villains gone wild (and, uh, Deku) are unlikely to trust the same people who created this mess in the first place. While WE know and love cinnamon roll Izuku, “the citizens” only know him as the target of Shigaraki’s destruction. He’s billed by Jeany as the One True Hope but the citizens know him as a dirty teenager insane enough to break his own bones in a school competition. He’s somehow related to AFO and is either a bomb for AFO, a Nomu-fied corpse doing AFO’s bidding, a target for Shigaraki, or a weapon against AFO that is falling apart at the seams. None of that is reassuring, so I can see why the crowd gets mad enough to make Izuku’s Danger Sense go off. The heroes need to take a moment to really empathize and understand the crowd’s fear and anger.

What’s missing from this scene? ALL MIGHT. The focus on Deku and the OFA/AFO quirks completely omits that Izuku is All Might’s handpicked successor, and that All Might used OFA as a force for good for decades. Jeany and Ochako confirmed Izuku is the special powerOFA holder, so it’s all out in the open except for how Izuku came to possess OFA in the first place. So much for Mt Lady and Endeavor’s media discussion in Ch.317! Also, as Lady Nagant told us, the HPSC was well aware of AFO and tracked his movements. AFO may have been a secret from the public, but was NOT a blind spot for heroes. Same with Gigantomachia — Gran Torino and Tsukauchi failed to capture him, but they knew of him and his association with AFO. (Nobody, including All Might, knew about the doctor and his quirk duplication prior to Hawks’s spy work and the hospital raid.)

I want to see all of this come into the open because the hero failures stem from All Might working alone in secret to stop existential threats while other heroes fought each other for table scraps. (Think of Manual, who is such a plain and underpowered hero, but was clutch during the war.) Heroes STILL aren’t working together, and to fight dual AFOs they are going to need every last bit of help they can get from each other, from students, and from citizens — quirked or not. Anyone who is willing or able to help should join in.

Unease is referenced in this chapter, and unease is what happens whenever All Might disappears. At first when All Might retires, Twice notes the widespread unease with Endeavor as the new #1. Endeavor himself notes his unease with becoming #1 by default rather than earning it. Shigaraki has a persistent unease with his past (pre-awakening), arguably because All Might never came to save Tenko.

Unease spreading through the citizens feeds into AFO’s win conditions perfectly. He WANTS as many fractured and walled-off groups as possible. To steal OFA and rule for eternity, he needs to prevent a “singularity” of will that opposes him.

Let’s see what happens next chapter — I still don’t think Ochako has quite hit her “light of hope” moment yet, and am not convinced this speech will be it. I do think she’s trying hard to humanize Izuku as the OFA holder, but the irony is, in doing so, she is denying he is a special person to her. Only a few humans are truly special at the societal level, but we all have friends and loved ones that think we are special. That’s right, you are loved, even if you don’t have OFA. You are loved even when you need saving. I think this is what All Might was getting at when he tells Izuku during the Sports Festival that there is something special in Izuku. All Might is saying he feels a connection and a trust with Izuku because they were both born quirkless, which makes Izuku special to All Might. This contrasts with Endeavor and Jeany, who view Izuku as special solely because he is the OFA wielder, and Izuku’s need to rest is in service to that duty rather than Izuku’s needs as a human.

#mha #my hero academia #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha 323 #mha 323 #bnha meta #mha meta #long post #all might #izuku midoriya #ochako uraraka #principal nezu #rat principal #present mic #Jeany

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

so this morning, while scrolling through my fb feed, i came across an nyt opinion/advice piece from a 27yo (ie basically me lmao) who is obviously lucky, in a sense, to finally land their “dream job using my (their) skills” etc. like obvs i can’t read it bc of the stupid “you get one free article a month if you either don’t have an account or subscription” (my one free article was used up reading an article about adult adhd like last week)….. thing that nyt does.

but anyway. back on topic lol. the crux of the article in both the headline and the quote snippet was that the advice asker was really dissatisfied with the 40 hour work week that came with her “dream job”. with how having this 40hr workweek gave her no time to do her busy chores like house cleaning or laundry or didn’t even give her time to let her have her hobbies/creative pursuits (whatever they were/are).

however, in the comments on the article (and apparently from those who read the article on the comments, the advice/opinion column writer) a good bunch of like gen Xer’s and baby boomers (im assuming) were ganging up on the asker like “suck it up princess, it’s what life is!!! i work 70+ hours a week and LOVE IT and have just resigned myself to the fact that i have NO time left over to do my “chores”! learn to O U T S O U R C E these life admin tasks to someone else!!! everyone MUST LEARN this in america!!! it makes life so much easier ☺️” and such.

of course, there were plenty of the same bs comments that you see on anything about careers or home ownership towards millennials/gen Z’ers about “learn to go WITHOUT and save save save and squander your time so that you NEVER live and HAVE FUN or TIME FOR HOBBIES! my bet is that your parents did that and they survived just fine while also raising your ungrateful spiteful ass (not including any type of health issues they might have picked up from such long hours/shitty working conditions) so why can’t you just L E A R N to do the same you precious spoilt brat!!! because the reality of Real Life™️ is that you can’t have it both ways!!! then you’ll have early retirement guaranteed, hopefully!!! and know that hobbies really are time wasters most of the time ☺️ or at least they were for me!!! and your precious so-called “creative pursuits” most definitely are time wasters. no one needs THOSE.” and so on so forth.

they also had jibes for her bc the asker wanted to start a family at some point apparently… and apparently it’s “much worse” once you have kids. like. thanks geraldine and henry. you’ve just told us how much you’ve resented having your kids/family in one fell swoop. your opinion which you’ve framed as unhelpful, condescending advice is now voided.

like. i don’t know how rhonda or paul or deandra or philip could miss the point so fucking entirely. why the fuck should anyone- nay everyone (bc that’s what they make it sound like)- learn to outsource their busy chores like laundry/house cleaning/grocery shopping or god knows what else- to someone else???? why is that apparently a standard expected to be learnt in the US???

like why the fuck are you so desperate for people not to have free time to do these things (unless of course they live in some of those shitty nyc or other big city apartment blocks that don’t come with individual private laundries in the self-contained flats or a communal laundry on like the bottom floor or w/e for example) frank????

deidre why the hell are you so bitterly hankering about “be grateful that you have it easier than most and learn that hobbies mean jackshit and just sell your soul and time to your boss!!! when will the generation stopping being “me me me!!!” and “work life balance!” and think about the company’s bottom line!! learn that “work life balance” is never important! work like a slave for 50 years and see if your valuable experience is needed then! that’s when you’ll learn that those hours where you were never being lazy, instead of just expecting life to be handed to you, will have paid off!” or whatever other ridiculously toxic capitalist bullshit they were spitting out.

obviously there were FAR MORE people actually supporting the question asker and echoing the idea that the 40hr workweek is now redundant. they were also putting down the opinion/advice piece writer’s advice to the asker….. that was apparently similar to the all the bitter people on the comments saying that the 27yo was just “asking for too much” and had to “learn to suck it up instead of being a petulant and overly selfish dick!!” etc etc etc. we all know the spiel as thoroughly as the macarena now.

because whats so fucking wrong with wanting time to yourself and wanting time to do your busy chores??? why the fuck should i be outsourcing these to other people (unless of course you’re still living at home and your parents are still like “hey what clothes do you need washed i’m doing a load rn” or you have a partner that works from home or has some type of parental leave etc)???? i want to do my own laundry. i want to do my own gardening (ok lawn mowing or tree lopping (if needed) i’d actually outsource bc i can’t lift or push lawn mowers bc they’re heavy af for me or and i obvs can’t use a chainsaw)… but i want to do my own grocery shopping. i want to do my own cooking (although i would consider the meal kit services once i had job that allowed me to afford like $50 a month for one of those meal kits sub services) i want to do my own cleaning.

why, if i lived in the US and not australia, am i just expected to learn to outsource all of these tasks even if i don’t have the money for it??? like why the actual fuck are so many of you so fucking weirdly proud of being absolutely worked into the fucking ground for your “great country” (although this is actually bleeding through to australia too and i hate it); working like literally close to 100 hours a week???

because i wasn’t aware you had to be whatever the fuck his name is from 127 hours and cut your fucking limbs off just to fucking survive a job in either corporate america or just let alone any goddamned job in america….. all so they can supposedly “learn to like working for free and devaluing your worth even more to your employer through overworking yourself and always being available!!! mental health is for those who aren’t built for the Real Adult World™️!!! this person is a prime example of the younger generations being weak and dissatisfied with life so often because of their “oh poor little me!!! care for me!!” act. NO ONE CARES FOR YOU today. stop being so over-expectant/demanding and juvenile!!! only YOU care yourself and you should NEVER expect someone else to pick you up from YOUR bootstraps!!! you’re fucking whiny and conceited babies. the lot of you!!!”

because i honestly don’t know who the fuck would enjoy working 70+ hours week with no time to themselves to do what they enjoy doing…. or enjoy having zilch time to catch up on errands and life admin duties or just general house chores; especially if you’ve moved cities or an entire fucking state/s away from your family and support network. let alone doing the same thing on 40 hours a week.

and on top of everything, let’s not even get started on the time spent commuting to and from work or even commuting for life errands/tasks etc etc- especially if you’re like me and you’re nowhere near the capital city’s centre (ie sydney australia for me) for there to be reliable enough public transport and longer commute times to certain places in those cities (that i’ve bitched about plenty before on other posts on here about work/jobs).

get your head out of your asses warren and viola et al and realise that work life balance is literally NOT ASKING FOR MUCH and is asking employers to just have basic respect for their employees time if they work fulltime. it’s literally detrimental to ones health if they have to sacrifice what feels like (or what is literally like) their entire fucking existence to their employer just for meagre pay and just to fucking survive.

because i read a heart-breaking article last night from huffpost (posted by buzzfeed on fb) about a woman in the US who literally hid her having a second baby from her employer for an entire fucking year (literally the entire pregnancy and birth of the baby and the first 6 months post pushing the baby out) during the pandemic all because she was scared she would get demoted or lose her leading of a project and lose her bs “temp” job which had really turned into full time work although the employer never said anything about it being actually full time hours or whatever…. and plus the lady herself was apparently to scared to ask to be put on the books fulltime too for some weird reason.

like honestly. fuck capitalism. fuck thinking that “work life balance is just too hard for employers to add and regulate. it’s an excuse and ploy for workers to be unprofessional, unproductive and lazy!” or whatever the fuck. everyone deserves time to themselves to pursue their interests/hobbies and busy chores/life admin. no one deserves to waste their entire life working 70+ work weeks for those employers who literally have no respect for their employees personal lives and time.

and particularly during the time that is the pandemic as we’ve seen so many companies having to learn to wholeheartedly embrace working from home and more flexible schedules for their workers. worklife balance is absolutely fucking beneficial for everyone involved.

america fix your bullshit work ethic right now lmao.

#life #about me #shut up ilona #ilona’s job hunting thoughts and woes lmao

[transgalthoughts]

Guide to transitioning on a budget when you’re scared to come out but certain you want to

There are a few components to this: budgeting, getting treatment, coming out, general life stuff

BUDGETING First and centrally is budgeting. I don’t know what your income is so I’m not going to assume, but here is what my expenditure has been and what I think is reasonable as a goal if you do not have uncontrollable overheads you can’t help - additionally you may find some of my spending to be a bit much (£600 a month rent is quite steep, but cos I live in Oxford and the utilities and everything are included in that price it works out as a fairly decent option)

£600 a month shared housing (+ utilities, council tax etc). This is for Oxford, you can probably find it cheaper in most other places.

£200 a month monthly spending - use a budgeting app like Emma (you will probably need to spend more if you need a car, but try and avoid one if you can, cycling is a good transport option. You should do big shops every week or two, NOT regular small ones, you will spend more. If you are really committed to making headway quickly then unfortnately you can’t go out, it will eat up money like nothing else, try and see your friends in person at your house or theirs, you can be honest or say you don’t like the atmosphere. Cook in bulk using cheap ingredients - tinned and frozen food is a huge win. If you really want to cut down on spending make sure to buy vitamin pills and psyllium husk powder - you can eat less healthily without feeling like crap all the time if you’re eating stuff like this. If you want to eat super healthily try frozen mixed vegetables, tinned tomatoes, lentils, tinned fish, and tinned pulses all mixed together in a wok with smoked paprika and salt - it’s quite cheap, imo very tasty, and very healthy. 

Worth noting: over the course of a year your actual monthly spending is likely to be more liek £250 if you budget for £200 a month - you’ll need to replace phones and laptops and make big one off purchases occasionally, but remember the goal is saving, if you can avoid these costs then do (is your phone freezing for 20 seconds every half an hour really grounds for a replacement?) The £250 total spending per month is total spending - if you want to do something fun this should come out of other spending - not your savings 

Medications: inhousepharmacy is a good one - make sure to buy in bulk (this goes for everything). Don’t try and include this in monthly spending, try and include it in the £50 extra a month spending. Here is a good guide for the first purchase Cyproterone acetate - 300 50mg tablets for £202.22 (1 a day) Estrofem - 364 2mg tablets for £148.94 (start on 1 a day, maybe move up to two if you feel you need to and are comfortable) - take these sublingually to increase the effective dose without spending more. So, your overall cost of living per year should be approximately £10,700 - put the rest into premium bonds, you can take it out relatively easily and you’re guaranteed not to lose your money (if the UK government collapses you have bigger problems than your savings being gone).  If you’re earning £20k a year then you should be able to save £9,300 a year.  If you have the time and energy try getting into some work, especially gig economy work on top of your current job/time in university (deliveroo for example). 

GETTING TREATMENT  Before any of the savings stuff, before you are even sure you are trans, talk to your GP about it and say ytou want to be referred to a GIC. It will take 3 years - you will have plenty of time to find yourself within that time, and if you still haven’t you can find yourself in the GIC. DO NOT wait until you are absolutely sure before telling your GP, I know it is scary but you can do it, and it’s almost easier to do it when you’re not sure. If you wait for a year you will fucking hate yourself 2 years later when you have been waiting for treatment for what seems like your entire life at this point - and private GICs are expensive as fuck. 

If you can afford it go to a private GIC - if you want bottom or top surgery with any reputable surgery you will need to have been officially on hormones for a year, self-medding doesn’t count. There are a few options out there for you but most notably are genderGP (more expensive, but there is less expectation of you to prove you are trans, and they have no issue with previous self medding) and gendercare (less expensive but they may decide you are not quite trans enough - they are also less willing to take on patients who have previously self-medded). Additionally a lot of GPs will not work with (ie pay for the prescriptions for you on the recommendation of) any private GIC, but the ones that do are more willing to work with gendercare than genderGP - look into this more before deciding who you want to go with.  Do not underestimate the importance of the type of HRT you are using. Cyproterone acetate and oestrogen pills are fine. GnRH analogues and transdermal oestrogen patches work far more effectively and with fewer side effects (but GnRH analogues in particular are far more expensive). 

COMING OUT  Coming out all at once publically is gonna be really fucking daunting. You are gonna want to identify individuals and talk to them one on one about it first. These should be people you are close with and who you think are gonna be supportive (ideally both, not just one of the other, but prioritise those who you think are gonna be supportive first - you will gain confidence as you do it if you choose the right people, and lose it if you choose the wrong ones). You do not owe honesty to your parents about this. 

Once you have a good selection of people who you know who are supportive start thinking about how you want to play this - in particular how sure and scared you are. I decided to get FFS (facial feminisation surgery) BEFORE coming out publicly - but after 2 years on HRT (this restricts your choice of surgeons btw). I was absolutely certain before I did this and if you plan on doing this you should be too.  I got my surgery with Dr Jesus Baez in Guadalajara (lip lift, closed rhinoplasty, type t osteotomy, hairline advancement, eyebrow raise, forehead bone shaving) and it cost £12,000 for the surgery - but a lot more than that for everything else (so I spent around £16,000 in total - and that was being tight). However, that’s less than 2 years of saving on £20k a year, so get started now.  Voice training - do it, you can do it for free using transvoice on youtube - the main thing to practice if you have a deep, chest resonant voice is simply doing the *pah pah pah* exercise as often as you can (you can do it silently) and before you start talking to people. 

Also GPs can refer you for voice training directly, even if a GP is unwilling to work with a private GIC they might be willing to do with this (since there is no liability associated with referring you to train your voice more effectively). I haven’t done this but I expect there is gonna be a waiting list though. You really can’t voice train too often (though you can too much in one session).  HEALTH So as mentioned in the budgeting section it is very possible to eat healthily on a budget (well, the kind of budget I recommend, please please don’t try and push it too hard because you need to stay healthy for this - doctors, even gender specialists, are pretty unwilling to prescribe for trans health care because this country is transphobic, so you ideally want to be a picture of health before asking for treatment. Eat healthily, run, bulk up those legs and work that core (leg press, side leg raises with resistance band, crunches, squats, sit ups, reverse crunches, side crunches etc) - all of these things will a) improve the results of blood tests and make it easier to get a prescription, b) hopefully give you a body shape more in line with conventional standards for women and c) stimulate production of hgh which will make the estradiol more effective (but don’t even think of taking hgh as a medication without explicitly getting it prescribed by a doctor, it is seriously not worth it and it can fuck up your body a lot making it impossible to get effective treatment).  GOOD LUUUUCK!!!

[theoriginalladya]

Coats on the Citadel? :D

Sweet!  Thanks for asking!!!

So, this takes place back in ME1, shortly after Caleb has his encounter with Finch.  The next time the Normandy docks, Caleb chases everyone but those on watch off the ship for a bit of R&R (in his timeline, after Therum and Noveria, but before Feros and Virmire).  I don’t have a whole lot of it yet, but there is a reason they run into one another (ie: Anderson’s behind it. Again. :P ) but I haven’t gotten that far in the writing yet.  I DO, however, have the bit of them meeting up.

He spends the better part of an hour chasing off the last of the stragglers – Garrus’ love of tinkering with the Mako and Adams’ insistence that he should be the one to supervise the maintenance on the new drive core, notwithstanding – before grabbing his own pack and heading out. He checks in with Pressly on the way through the CIC, but the man does a perfect impersonation of him for once as he shoos Caleb on through.  Chuckling to himself and shaking his head in bemusement (Pressly’s attempt at an Irish accent is good enough to fool an Englishman at least, he’d give him that much), Caleb exits the ship.

“Trasna ort féin!  “Hammersmith, what the hell are you doing here?” he says by way of greeing as he steps out of the docking tube and onto the platform.

Though out of uniform at the moment, the dark hair, grey eyes, and casual smirk grinning back at him are all too familiar. “Might say the same ‘bout you, Shannon. Always knew you’d impress, but a Council Spectre?  That’s a bit above and beyond, even for the likes of you!”  

Coats extends his hand and Caleb takes it, pumping it twice before nodding in the direction of the lift.  As they board, he asks, “All kidding aside, why are you here?  Last I heard, they were pulling you back to sniper school.”

Coats grins.  “Still there,” he replies.  “Took a bit of leave between classes.  Thought I’d come see what everyone’s been fussing about.”  He crosses his arms and eyes Caleb head to foot then back again, before concluding, “Hate to disappoint you, mate, but you still look like the same gangly Paddy I met all those years ago.”

Huffing, Caleb runs a hand through his hair, landing at the back of his neck where he rubs at tension that just won’t let up. “If you only knew.”

The lift deposits them just outside of C-Sec Academy, and Caleb leads the way to the public transportation on the assumption Coats hasn’t figured it out yet.  His friend doesn’t seem to mind, so he hails a skycab to get them to the Wards.  “How long are you here?”

Coats shrugs.  “Couple of days, give or take.  Saw the old man – imagine my surprise finding him here, of all places.”

The skycab arrives and they clamber inside. Caleb reads off their destination in the Wards and then sits back, tilts his head, and eyes his friend with curiosity. Something about his explanation isn’t sitting right, but it’s also couched by the memory of why Anderson is on the Citadel.  That produces a scowl, and Caleb averts his gaze to the window to stare out at passing traffic.  “Political bullshit,” he mutters beneath his breath.

“Ah.  Wondered ‘bout that.  Last I’d heard, he was taking up the reins of a prototype frigate.”

Snorting softly Caleb nods.  “The Normandy.  I was his XO.”

“And now you’re in command.”  Coats whistles softly through his teeth.  “Mate, you aren’t just moving up in the galaxy, you’re racing there!  Maybe slow down and enjoy the ride a bit?”

Caleb turns back around to face him.  There’s so much he wants to share, but he can’t.  Not yet.  Depending on the Council, maybe not ever.  Instead, he shifts the conversation.  “I don’t know.  Last promotions list I saw, you’d made Staff Commander.  You got me beat.”

“Spectre sort of shoves that by the wayside,” Coats reasons.  “You don’t just have admirals and generals eyeing you now, but the bloody galactic Council.”

And that, Caleb knows and wants to argue but doesn’t, isn’t always a good thing.

#WIP Folder Meme #ladya writes #mshenko #Caleb Shepard #(Ryan) Coats #OTP: Brothers in Arms #ME1 era #jedirangerpenguin

[communistkenobi-archive]

You got it with gravitational reasons! Unknown Regions are full of weird hyperspace gravity anomalies and stuff. Also the Chiss empire is out leftward, maybe quietly discouraging their neighbors. But the thing about the wind blowing east is way more interesting

Oh sick that’s super cool actually!! 

And yeah! A really great wordlbuilding tip I would give to people wanting to create cities, whether in DnD campaigns, original fiction, etc, is to think of cities as historical artifacts, not just things that spring up when you create them. 

Like I mentioned in my tags, the reason a lot of North American cities have rich west sides and poor east sides is “because of” the wind. When industrialization occurred in North America, a lot of the factories were built in the centre of cities, since public transportation was mostly just trains and the centre was the most well-connected part of those settlements. I can’t remember the exact reason why winds blow west -> east on the continent, but I think it has something to do with the Rocky Mountains. But because of that W -> E direction, the fumes from factories blew eastward, so the ruling class tended to build their homes on the other side of the factories so they could avoid the health hazards factories presented, imposing them instead on workers. And because wealth is so intergenerational, a lot of the times it stayed in the west side, even though factories are now largely absent because of deindustrialization in the 90s/early 2000s. Physical architecture is obviously extremely difficult and disruptive to rebuild or replace, so often times the policies and practices of a governing state from 50-100 years ago are still readily apparent in city infrastructure. It’s one of the many reasons why moving past private transit (ie cars) is so difficult, despite them being a massive waste of space, causing untold environmental and societal damage, and generally being extremely inefficient and detrimental to human movement.

(This is a super simplified version of the history of city building and it’s been a while since I interacted with the material, but if anyone is interested I’m sure I can find some of my old readings on the topic.)

ANYWAY, for worldbuilding - something as simple as the direction of the wind can shape the spatial arrangement of cities. Same with altitude, proximity to waterbodies, and other environmental factors. They themselves aren’t the cause, but their presence is expressed in social and cultural terms in human settlements. The spatial arrangement of cities is obviously not random, but it is often hidden from public view, because sometimes the catalyst for a particular trend to occur happened generations ago and is potentially not even a factor in city life today.

#sw.txt #misc.txt #i don't have a city planning degree or anything so my knowledge is limited #but im familiar with critical social science texts about the arrangement of cities #so i am always down to chat about that #i also know virtually nothing outside a north american context either #like asia and europe and africa and south america all have vastly different histories obv #and are far more complex and variable #NA was colonised pretty rapidly so the trends supposedly more uniform #anyway #eri-223

[reading-writing-revolution]

This is very thoughtfully and sensibly written by a cardiologist at University of Wisconsin, Dr James Stein:

Stay safe, but also sane, my friends. Thanks for the original share, Califa Witsch.

COVID-19 update as we start to leave our cocoons. The purpose of this post is to provide a perspective on the intense but expected anxiety so many people are experiencing as they prepare to leave the shelter of their homes. My opinions are not those of my employers and are not meant to invalidate anyone else’s – they simply are my perspective on managing risk.

In March, we did not know much about COVID-19 other than the incredibly scary news reports from overrun hospitals in China, Italy, and other parts of Europe. The media was filled with scary pictures of chest CT scans, personal stories of people who decompensated quickly with shortness of breath, overwhelmed health care systems, and deaths. We heard confusing and widely varying estimates for risk of getting infected and of dying – some estimates were quite high.

Key point #1: The COVID-19 we are facing now is the same disease it was 2 months ago. The “shelter at home” orders were the right step from a public health standpoint to make sure we flattened the curve and didn’t overrun the health care system which would have led to excess preventable deaths. It also bought us time to learn about the disease’s dynamics, preventive measures, and best treatment strategies – and we did. For hospitalized patients, we have learned to avoid early intubation, to use prone ventilation, and that remdesivir probably reduces time to recovery. We have learned how to best use and preserve PPE. We also know that several therapies suggested early on probably don’t do much and may even cause harm (ie, azithromycin, chloroquine, hydroxychloroquine, lopinavir/ritonavir). But all of our social distancing did not change the disease. Take home: We flattened the curve and with it our economy and psyches, but the disease itself is still here.

Key point #2: COVID-19 is more deadly than seasonal influenza (about 5-10x so), but not nearly as deadly as Ebola, Rabies, or Marburg Hemorrhagic Fever where 25-90% of people who get infected die. COVID-19’s case fatality rate is about 0.8-1.5% overall, but much higher if you are 60-69 years old (3-4%), 70-79 years old (7-9%), and especially so if you are over 80 years old (CFR 13-17%). It is much lower if you are under 50 years old (<0.6%). The infection fatality rate is about half of these numbers. Take home: COVID-19 is dangerous, but the vast majority of people who get it, survive it. About 15% of people get very ill and could stay ill for a long time. We are going to be dealing with it for a long time.

Key point #3: SARS-CoV-2 is very contagious, but not as contagious as Measles, Mumps, or even certain strains of pandemic Influenza. It is spread by respiratory droplets and aerosols, not food and incidental contact. Take home: social distancing, not touching our faces, and good hand hygiene are the key weapons to stop the spread. Masks could make a difference, too, especially in public places where people congregate. Incidental contact is not really an issue, nor is food.

What does this all mean as we return to work and public life? COVID-19 is not going away anytime soon. It may not go away for a year or two and may not be eradicated for many years, so we have to learn to live with it and do what we can to mitigate (reduce) risk. That means being willing to accept *some* level of risk to live our lives as we desire. I can’t decide that level of risk for you – only you can make that decision. There are few certainties in pandemic risk management other than that fact that some people will die, some people in low risk groups will die, and some people in high risk groups will survive. It’s about probability.

Here is some guidance – my point of view, not judging yours:

1. People over 60 years old are at higher risk of severe disease – people over 70 years old, even more so. They should be willing to tolerate less risk than people under 50 years old and should be extra careful. Some chronic diseases like heart disease and COPD increase risk, but it is not clear if other diseases like obesity, asthma, immune disorders, etc. increase risk appreciably. It looks like asthma and inflammatory bowel disease might not be as high risk as we thought, but we are not sure - their risks might be too small to pick up, or they might be associated with things that put them at higher risk.

People over 60-70 years old probably should continue to be very vigilant about limiting exposures if they can. However, not seeing family – especially children and grandchildren – can take a serious emotional toll, so I encourage people to be creative and flexible. For example, in-person visits are not crazy – consider one, especially if you have been isolated and have no symptoms. They are especially safe in the early days after restrictions are lifted in places like Madison or parts of major cities where there is very little community transmission. Families can decide how much mingling they are comfortable with - if they want to hug and eat together, distance together with masks, or just stay apart and continue using video-conferencing and the telephone to stay in contact. If you choose to intermingle, remember to practice good hand hygiene, don’t share plates/forks/spoons/cups, don’t share towels, and don’t sleep together.

2. Social distancing, not touching your face, and washing/sanitizing your hands are the key prevention interventions. They are vastly more important than anything else you do. Wearing a fabric mask is a good idea in crowded public place like a grocery store or public transportation, but you absolutely must distance, practice good hand hygiene, and don’t touch your face. Wearing gloves is not helpful (the virus does not get in through the skin) and may increase your risk because you likely won’t washing or sanitize your hands when they are on, you will drop things, and touch your face.

3. Be a good citizen. If you think you might be sick, stay home. If you are going to cough or sneeze, turn away from people, block it, and sanitize your hands immediately after.

4. Use common sense. Dial down the anxiety. If you are out taking a walk and someone walks past you, that brief (near) contact is so low risk that it doesn’t make sense to get scared. Smile at them as they approach, turn your head away as they pass, move on. The smile will be more therapeutic than the passing is dangerous. Similarly, if someone bumps into you at the grocery store or reaches past you for a loaf of bread, don’t stress - it is a very low risk encounter, also - as long as they didn’t cough or sneeze in your face (one reason we wear cloth masks in public!).

5. Use common sense, part II. Dial down the obsessiveness. There really is no reason to go crazy sanitizing items that come into your house from outside, like groceries and packages. For it to be a risk, the delivery person would need to be infectious, cough or sneeze some droplets on your package, you touch the droplet, then touch your face, and then it invades your respiratory epithelium. There would need to be enough viral load and the virions would need to survive long enough for you to get infected. It could happen, but it’s pretty unlikely. If you want to have a staging station for 1-2 days before you put things away, sure, no problem. You also can simply wipe things off before they come in to your house - that is fine is fine too. For an isolated family, it makes no sense to obsessively wipe down every surface every day (or several times a day). Door knobs, toilet handles, commonly trafficked light switches could get a wipe off each day, but it takes a lot of time and emotional energy to do all those things and they have marginal benefits. We don’t need to create a sterile operating room-like living space. Compared to keeping your hands out of your mouth, good hand hygiene, and cleaning food before serving it, these behaviors might be more maladaptive than protective.

6. There are few absolutes, so please get comfortable accepting some calculated risks, otherwise you might be isolating yourself for a really, really long time. Figure out how you can be in public and interact with people without fear.

We are social creatures. We need each other. We will survive with and because of each other. Social distancing just means that we connect differently. Being afraid makes us contract and shut each other out. I hope we can fill that space created by fear and contraction with meaningful connections and learn to be less afraid of each of other.

[kaspbrak-tozier-reddie]

#1 & #30

#1 - “I’m cold” “take my jacket” & #30 - “Oh my gosh, you’re so annoying!”

Pairing: Reddie

Warnings: Sonia’s parenting, swearing, underage drinking

Masterlist + Prompt List + Asks

———————————————————————

Eddie and Richie have been struggling for the past year with their newly found long distant relationship. Sure they had started dating only a couple of weeks before graduation but they had to split for college. Eddie had left sooner as Sonia had wanted to move to New York to be with Eddie since he didn’t want to go to a community college. It had been had at first but considering the technology, ie. Skype and phone apps like Snapchat and Messenger, it was a little easier. 

Since there is a couple weeks break for Christmas and New Years, Richie and Eddie decided to meet back in Derry. Only for the sole purpose of introducing Eddie to Richie’s parents, well as his boyfriend instead of his best friend. 

So that’s where they’re at now, standing on the 2-inch high, snow-covered pavement in front of Richie’s childhood home. “Does it feel weird?” Eddie asks Richie. “I mean, you haven’t been home for a whole year.”

“It is a little,” Richie admits. “It should go well this time, hopefully.”

Sonia Kaspbrak was an easy trip, Richie was already in New York for July so Eddie thought it’d be best to tell Sonia. Of course in good Sonia fashion, she blew a casket at Richie, claiming him to be dirty and had also corrupted her saint of a son. After leaving in a huff, Eddie was apologising to Richie on the subway back to his off-campus apartment.

“Well, let’s go. It’s chilly.” Eddie says, shivering a little. Richie pushed open the gate and led Eddie up to the front door and knocking.

Richie makes a note that the house exterior has not changed within the past year, except for a new paint job. There is no more chipping paint on the exterior walls and the front door is now stained timber instead of painted red. 

“Eddie!” Maggie exclaims as soon as the front door swings open, pulling him into a hug. Once she releases Eddie, she brings her son in for a bone-crushing hug. “When you said you were bringing someone over, I was hoping that it was - ” Maggie cut herself off and looks between the two boys.

Richie isn’t sure if she cut herself short because she’s happy or if she thinks it’s a stupid idea. A stupid idea that will tear their whole friendship and friend group apart if they ever break up.

“About fucking time you two! So when did this happen? how long have you been hiding this from me?” Maggie says with far too much joy laced in her voice, for Richie’s liking at least.

“Ma, can we go inside? It’s cold!” Richie whines.

“Oh crap! Yes of course.” Maggie steps aside to let Eddie and Richie into the house.

****

The house is like an oven compared to outside. The Toziers have their fireplace crackling away and a couple of heaters. Richie and Eddie remove their boots and socks and quickly changing into the spare shoes they had packed, in case of this kind of weather. Eddie can blissfully smell the roast that Wentworth and Maggie have prepared as well as the strong scent of cinnamon. 

“Oh Eddie, this is a pleasant surprise,” Wentworth exclaims stepping from the kitchen to greet him. He extends his right hand outwards to Eddie, which Eddie politely shakes. “When Richie said he was bringing a boy over, I didn’t expect - “ Went pauses. “Oh my goodness!”

Eddie swears he sees Richie blush, through his peripheral vision. “So Eddie is this mysterious boy that you’ve been gushing about for the past year?” Maggie questions her son.

“’Mystery boy’?” Eddie asks Richie. Richie’s already pink-tinged face, starts to get darker before resting on a crimson.

“Well, we were keeping it a secret until we knew how serious it was,” Richie admits. “So, mystery.”

“Oh, so this is serious?” Went asks.

“Yeah,” Eddie replies.

Went and Maggie smile at each other, joyously, and quickly bring the food out of the kitchen and a bottle of white wine, while Richie and Eddie take their seats. 

“I know that you’re both underage but one glass won’t kill you,” Maggie says. 

Eddie could think of a whole damned list but doesn’t say anything because he knows that she’s right. If they, however, drink a whole bottle or two, they’d be in strife. He watches as Maggie pours both him and Richie half a glass of the wine, being the responsible but fun adult that she is. 

Richie starts to load up Eddie’s plate with the chicken that Went made, it sort of became a habit. When they were kids Eddie was shy and scared to eat a lot of the junk food that the losers had. Only taking minuscule amounts of chips, candy, chocolate, pizza etc. Eddie never touched any soda, opting to only drink water or freshly juiced oranges that can from Mike’s farm. It was also because Sonia used to pile food onto Eddie’s plate, so Richie often did it for Eddie even though Eddie always says he could do it himself.

“This is so nice Mr Tozier,” Eddie says after a few mouthfuls of food.

“Please, Edward you’ve earnt first name privileges,” Wentworth says, “and thank you.” Eddie smiles and takes another forkful to his mouth.

****

“If you two are going up to your room, Richard, I want that door open,” Maggie says sternly.

“Okay mom,” Richie replies and leads Eddie upstairs to Richie’s bedroom. 

The room’s bare except for a few posters, here and there, ones that are tattered or aren’t one of Richie’s favourite bands anymore. There aren’t any photos stuck to the edges of his mirror or framed photos on the nightstands. The sheets were still black as were the 3 blankets that Maggie must’ve put on the bed. 

“I guess you aren’t allowed in my bed tonight,” Richie jokes, noting the mattress on the floor beside his bed.

“Do you want me to?” Eddie asks jokingly, the two laugh nervously, unsure of the new protocols that have just been placed in the Tozier household. It’s no secret that Richie and Eddie use to sleep in the same bed, or that both would sneak into each other’s houses in the middle of the night when they were younger. But now that they are dating? 

“Screw my parents,” Richie says in his British accent.

“Not the British guy,” Eddie groans. 

Richie opens his window and sits on the ledge, letting his long legs dangle over the side of the house, Eddie joins him and rests his head on Richie’s shoulder. They used to sit on the window frame for hours, looking up at the sky. If it was Summer/Spring, they’d climb up to the roof and lie on the metal sheets. Since the roof was probably covered in snow, the two sit on the frame looking aimlessly at the sky, making shapes with the stars.

“Want to drive around town for a bit and maybe go to the fields?” Richie asks.

“Just like old times, eh Rich?” Eddie chuckles, the pair climbs down the tree and make their way to the beat-up truck that never made it to Seattle. Richie didn’t want to take the truck to Seattle because everything he’d need was within walking distance or he’d use his bike. 

*

As they got into the car, Eddie shivers, regretting not grabbing his coat on the way out. “I’m cold” Eddie whispers.

“Here, take my jacket.” Richie shrugs off his worn-out denim jacket and passes it to Eddie. Almost immediately, Eddie pulls it over his arms and wraps himself in it, enjoying the strong scent of Richie’s cologne and washing detergent. 

They drove around town, taking in the breathtaking view of the retro buildings. You ever get that in big cities, the whole modernisation thing didn’t sit well with Richie and Eddie, it took a couple of months for them to get truly get used to the idea of everything. Especially with public transport. 

Driving through town then to the fields on the outskirts of the town had become their thing. When Richie got his truck, he took Eddie out to celebrate. He had asked him to stay the night, in case they got back late. They went to the diner that the losers always went to and then drove around before stopping on the side of the road before the big-ass sign saying “WELCOME TO DERRY”. 

Tonight was no different, except they didn’t go to the diner, they went to the 24/7 corner store for Slurpees (even though it is freezing out) and continued their drive around Derry. Richie pulls up on the side of the road and pulls out an old cassette tape that Eddie had made him a few years ago. The soft tune of ‘Tiny Dancer’ by Elton John played through the speakers. “Oh my goodness I forgot I made this!” Eddie squeaks, covering his face with his hands. 

“I haven’t listened to it in years,” Richie says and takes a slurp, finishing off his Slurpee. 

“I made this to express my love for you but um, I thought you didn’t feel the same way.”

“You kidding?! I kept chickening out until Stan basically pushed me to ask you out! If he didn’t I wouldn’t be with you now.”

“I’ve got to thank Stan.” 

Richie shoves Eddie slightly and Eddie shoves him back. They sit in silence watching the twinkling stars and enjoying each other’s company. Eddie found himself drifting off to sleep listening to ‘Can’t Help Falling in Love’ by Elvis Presley. Richie puts the car in drive and drives back to his house.

****

Richie struggles to carry Eddie’s sleeping body up the stairs to his bedroom while trying to not wake his parent. “Rich?” Maggie asks standing at the top of the stairs.

“Sorry, we went out and Eddie fell asleep,” Richie explains, whispering, and almost trips on the last stair, thankfully Maggie stops him and helps get Eddie into bed. “I’ll take the floor tonight.”

“Okay sweetheart, night.” 

“Night.” 

Richie partially closes the door and slides in beside Eddie. The boy beside him stirs a little before sitting up slightly. “Thanks for tonight, Rich,” Eddie slurs out.

“You’re welcome Eds. Do you want me to grab you something a little more comfy?”

“Yeah.”

Richie makes his way over to his dresser to get an old shirt, that he didn’t want to take but left in case he didn’t have clothes; and a pair of old sweatpants that had dozens of holes in them and hands them to Eddie. Eddie’s quick to kick off his jeans and rip off his T-Shirt and quickly slides on the items of clothing that Richie has just handed him.

“Checking me out Tozier?” Eddie chuckles.

“You know it Kaspbrak,” Richie replies and starts tickling Eddie’s sides.

“Oh my gosh, you’re so annoying.” Eddie groans out, hitting Richie’s hands away. “Just go to sleep asshole.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Richie cuddles into Eddie and listens to the sound of Eddie’s slow and steady breath and the sound of his heart beating, before finally allowing himself to drift to sleep.

#Reddie #eddie x richie #richie x eddie #edward kaspbrak #eddie kaspbrak #richard tozier #richie tozier #it chapter 1 #it chapter 2

[cardandpixel]

Die of the Dead - A KickStarter preview

2-5 Players, apx 40min, dice manipulation/area control, Radical8 Games Designers: James Allen and Mark Stockton-Pitt Artwork: Rusembell AS EVER THIS IS NOT A PAID/REIMBURSED PREVIEW, C&P just like the game a lot! Halloween in the UK means cheap masks at Asda, not answering the door for 5 days after 6pm, and eating all the bagged sweets you bought with no intention of ever giving out. For me as a sound designer and composer, it also means hours upon hours of sitting in front of a sequencer from August onwards creating sounds and characters with the sole intent of scaring the behecksus out of the general public. This year is going to be a weird one, with that little viral beastie still kicking around, so a few game nights playing monster and ghost games might be on the cards instead. We like to think of Halloween as a big deal in Europe and N America, but for residents of Central and South America, the end of October is a much more cultural affair. Nov 1st &  2nd sees the celebration of Dia de Muertes – The Day of the Dead. What strikes you first about anything to do with the celebration is the sheer splendour of colour and design. Just about everything involved with the celebration is a panoply of vibrancy, echoing the central philosophy of the holiday of celebrating, not mourning, the souls of those who have passed. What also struck me, was the playfulness of the festivities which often include sharing not just good stories of beloved friends and relatives, but often the funny and ridiculous, even foolish stories of their lives too. Though cultural misappropriation is a very lively topic in boardgames at the moment (and rightly so – 3Minute Boardgames’ current work on respectful handling of the Māori culture in games is a good example, as well as the many discussions over slavery portrayal as part of the #BLM dialogue). The joy, colour and playfulness of Dia de Muertes lends itself more comfortably as a subject for a potential boardgame to me – and yet, there are surprisingly few. Two in a relatively short list are the new version of Skull (though in design only), and the 2017 card game Dia de los Muertos. ARTISTIC DESIGN/COMPONENTS So, loving the aesthetic of the celebration as I do, I was drawn immediately to a small table at Airecon this year where an explosion of colour greeted us to the game Die of the Dead from Radical 8 Games. Die of the Dead is a dice manipulation / area control game where players take the roles of friendly spirits, gently guiding the souls of the departed up the marigold steps and back into the land of the living for the festival. The first player to have one of their souls reach the village step of the altar, is the winner. I’m shameless in my admission that I’m going to be more interested in a game that looks great – I know, but I can’t deny it. Die of the Dead had me hooked immediately. It looks utterly beautiful and features some astonishingly original components. What I hadn’t realised until I dug a little deeper, was how far-reaching this design goes. Radical 8 have not merely lifted a beautiful design aesthetic from a cultural phenomenon (unlike many who slap on sugar skull make up for Halloween, blissfully unaware of any deeper significance), but have done this game – properly. The design, the gameplay, the mechanics, and the components are all deeply inspired by the celebration and in an impressively respectful way.

Just taking the components as a starting point: The tokens – incense, candles, bread and marigolds are all significant gifts laid on the beautiful altars during the festival – the marigolds or cempasủchil especially are highly significant, their scent said to guide souls back to their family homes, an idea echoed in the mechanical use of the token. The 3D stepped altar (or ofrendas) – is highly suggestive of both the domestic and public stepped altars that are laid out with colourful gifts for the dead, again, echoed beautifully in the game. The player boards – these are holding sites for souls before their ascendency. The dice – are representations of the souls themselves and their movement around the board is highly thematic of the journeys that friends and relatives’ souls make over the festivities. The caskets – are both beautifully rendered solid boxes, but also functional as dice shakers / hidden resource boxes – each highly thematically and individually decorated.

It’s truly difficult to know where to start with this game as it has all been done so very well. The press pack for the forthcoming Kickstarter even cites the involvement of a cultural advisor and a Mexican artist, Rusembell on the project, and it shines through on everything to do with this game. It’s a lot of time, trouble and thoughtful effort that should be envied by many other designers.  No opportunity to reflect the splendour of the festival has been wasted at all in the design of this game, and Radical 8 should be very proud.

GAMEPLAY But no game is really safe from scrutiny of its mechanics, no matter how beautiful it is, and happily, Die of the Dead does not disappoint here either. In Die of the Dead, the players are each trying to guide their supply of souls (dice) from their home player board, via the caskets, to their final destination on the 3D altar at the end of the play area, back to the land of the living. Players will prepare their souls, add them to caskets, undergo a number of ‘area control’ style comparisons and finally, ascend their souls onto the steps of the altar where they may be rewarded with gifts or abilities.

The 4 caskets are the real heart of the game. It is here that most of the player interaction takes place, and it uses a clever and unique little mechanism to transport souls from the first casket to their eventual goal on the altar steps. Players will be adding their dice (souls) to the open first casket and from there on, the caskets are in constant motion. A player will take one action on their turn, by selecting a casket and carrying out the action associated with it. Each casket location has a different action, and these are noted on cards numbered 1-4 underneath the caskets themselves. Each casket also has a secondary ‘consequence’ action at the bottom of the card. Casket position 1 – players can add 3 prepared souls or 1 ‘free’ (unprepared) soul. If there are 2 players’ souls in the casket, the casket is shaken, if there’s a 1 rolled – move the casket along.

Casket position 2 – players may prepare 2 souls. The casket is then shaken and the souls compared (a variant on area majority) and the winner prepares another soul. If a 1 is rolled, the casket moves along.

Casket position 3 – the casket is shaken straight away, any duplicate souls are removed leaving 1 soul per player min in the casket. The player then takes a token, allowing additional abilities.

Casket position 4 – the casket is shaken and the souls compared again. 2 of the winner’s souls are ‘ascended’ to the altar steps. The casket is then either: moved along, a power soul gained (more later) or 1 of your own souls ascended to the steps.

Once again – this shifting and constant play for majority also feels very thematic to me and reminiscent of the playfulness of the festival itself “Oh our Uncle was so argumentative, he could have a fight in his own coffin!” I only noticed going through the rulebook that this was actually reflected in the artwork on the action cards, but when I was playing the demo I recall thinking that each of the locations was a little like a different aspect of the soul’s journey. Arrival, sorting, a little tussle with your neighbours and finally ascendancy. Always nice when a game rewards you like that by confirming you got the idea right! The use of the dice is interesting and once you get your head round the travel of the caskets, can provoke some immensely strategic decision making. Only 3 dice can be held in preparation, so the timing of free slots for preparation or potential return of dice from losing roll comparisons in the caskets makes for some very complex chain decisions (which then, of course, can be overturned in a second by another player’s actions). Dice in your pool are considered ‘free souls’ and usually have to be prepared before the caskets, but Casket 1 allows a free soul a ‘bye’ which is useful if you have no prepared souls or have no empty slots. There are also ‘Power Souls’ which can be won on the altar or selected by the Casket 4 action. These have a skull in place of the 3 & 4 and are considered wild in comparison rolls. Ascending souls means bringing them into the family altar – the very cool 3D steps at the end of the table. The first ascended soul goes on an empty space on stair 1. A player may select which bonus space would be best for them. The more players land on stair 1, the less choice of bonus, until the final player in a 5 pl game, who has to use an empty space with no bonus. As soon as a soul is placed on the 9th step, the game ends and the player who owns that soul is the winner (ie not the person who placed it – who may well be different due to Casket 4’s secondary action) This feels like a game that warrants replay to improve your strategy each time, though you are still delightfully at the whim of player interaction. This sort of ‘out of my hands’ game really appeals to me, it prevents run-away leads, often levels play a little and makes for much more fun for less experienced players. I like that skill is rewarded, but that it is not the sole way to win. The tokens are won either from Casket 4 or again as an ascendancy bonus. The tokens boards are double sided: Side A being a generally simpler action; Side B for a more strategic game. Eg The Candle on side A allows the caskets to simply be moved along, however, Side B allows 2 adjacent caskets to be swapped. Again, this allows for some much deeper strategic gameplay – especially tokens which allow ‘peeking’ into the caskets. I have a notoriously terrible memory and lost track of what souls I had in what caskets very quickly so a mitigating token I could use at just the right moment was really useful.

CONCLUSION York-based Radical 8 don’t have a huge back catalogue as yet, but Die of the Dead deserves to do really well as it’s an absolute belter and hopefully the start of great things to come. I’m not going to lie, there were a few times during the shortened demo, where the game was a lot to take in, but that’s as much about the way I learn games as the game itself. I learn best from going step-by-step thru the rules whilst shuffling pieces around and there just isn’t time for that in the scope of a convention demo (though the guys were amazingly patient and very clear with their explanation) – I did keep running to the casket ability cards during the demo though, so I have to hope they might put a small set of player aids in the box for 53 yr olds who are sat at the end of a 5pl table (hint). The game packs a satisfying amount of gameplay into its relatively small box, and the quality of the components is insanely good. I would happily play the handmade version from Airecon, but I’m guessing the final production will be even better.

It scratches a lot of gaming itches for me: variations in play each turn; lots of decision making; huge numbers of routes to winning; a nice bit of player interaction; and a decent chunk of screw-over and luck that means you can always blame someone else for your bad gameplay. I like the attempts to make for a simpler initial game, especially as there is a lot to keep track of in your first game. The player boards are actually doubled sided allowing an asymmetric start bonus for each player, and of course, the Token cards are double sided also. I appreciate efforts such as these as I think it helps newer gamers, slow learners (like me) and more casual gamers alike. I also appreciate the Open Casket variant which allows potentially for some much more devious play. However – there’s always a dark side, and it wouldn’t be fair to let this go in a balanced overview. Yes, the game has a fairly steep learning curve and a lot of concepts to take in from the get-go, but any game with a lot of strategic depth can have that same issue and so long as you don’t mind that, this game is no different from many others. But, my big issue is the one that has dogged mine and ‘Ers gaming life for years – 2 player variants. Die of the Dead does class itself as 2-5 player, and honestly, without going too much under the hood, I can’t really see a reason why it shouldn’t work normally at 2 players, but that’s for the designers to tell me as I’ve doubtless missed something. But…. The solution suggested in the box is one of my least favourite ways of solving the 2pl issue – effectively a dummy hand. My feeling on this solution has always been – if a game needs a dummy hand, then it doesn’t actually play at that player count. Especially here, as there is actually little stopping the dummy hand from winning. Nothing says you played a crap game more than the dummy hand actually winning. I’m genuinely hoping Radical 8 can come up with a much better solution for this between the KS campaign, and the final release. It’s worth it as it strikes me as an ideal 2pl game. It also feels to me like a great ‘strategic beer & pretzels’ game – of which I guarantee there are very few. It’s not far off as far as I can see, which is why the current rulebook 2pl solution feels so clamped on with my sort of standard of welding.  It seems particularly odd especially when so much variation in the game has been offered for higher/lower strategy. I only have a preview copy of the rulebook at the moment, and I had to read it thoroughly to make sure I’d recalled the game correctly - and I know there’s a lot of time between now and delivery, but it’s already a pretty decent rulebook and one that I’d feel confident learning the game from scratch from. It’s very clear and describes some quite complex ideas very clearly. I sincerely wish Radical 8 well with this on Kickstarter when it launches on August 25th 2020. The price looks to be about £27 + shipping, which feels like an absolute bargain for a game that’s been this well presented. It’s a lot of game for your money both design-wise and strategically and I would heartily recommend at least paying the page a visit. Happy gaming y’all!

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/radical8games/die-of-the-dead

Photo attributions: Beautiful game pics - Ross Connell (moregamesplease) @moregamespls Catrina image - By Paolaricaurte - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0 Altar image - By AmbarCCPM - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0 Artwork: Rusembell @Rusembell rusembell.deviantart.com Other images – official rulebook and our own.

[janiedean]

You know I was thinking about the activists against climate change and I actually find them very classist and eurocentric. I mean, I totally agree that global warming is a problem, but the solutions they suggest are quite bad: "Stop eating meat" I'm not american, but I've been to the south of the US where really poor people lives, you can buy a burger for much less than a full vegetable or fruit salad. "Stop using cars", what about the people living in the countryside or those who don't (1/2)

have jobs that can be easily attainable by train or subways, like factories workers. Also, not classist, but I find the "don't use planes" problematic, because it sentences people never to really leave their place and only discover the world virtually.

I kind of do agree with a lot tbh though I should probably specify, but in order: I do think the general idea is good because we should do something about it and I think it’s good that a lot of people are getting worked up about it and I mean I’m all for people actually getting informed but I agree that a lot of the rhetoric is kinda classist and most of all really western-centric, not just *euro* centric. as in... 

I agree that we should eat less meat (in the western countries at least, more on that later) and we should care for ethical consumption but are we seriously going to tell that to people who don’t live in europe/the us/places with highly industrialized agricolture/places where the economy is more based on livestock that they have to give meat and milk up? and what are they going to substitute it with, especially since thanks to global warming a lot of places are getting too hot/dry for farming? we serious?

also it’s not like intensive soy farming wouldn’t end up eventually ruining possible farming grounds same as intensive-anything is which is a thing we figured out in the middle ages (ie: that you have to change what you’re growing every X years and once in a while you have to let the ground rest), so like........ guys we’ve gotta feed billions of people on this planet, switching meat for soy won’t help shit and that’s not just about the south of the US where ofc meat costs less bc there’s more of it than fruit, it’s about the entire damned planet and assuming that works for everyone is naive;

also, humans are omnivore by nature and some people can’t not eat meat or animal proteins and anyway the problem isn’t eating meat period, it’s intensive breeding, which is bad bc it’s intensive as stated; 

(I’m not touching the ethical aspect because that’s not the point here)

also as you said you can’t say stop using cars if there’s no alternative - like, you have to give people alternatives - if they have to go to work and don’t have public transport how are they getting anywhere? like, campaign for public transport if you live somewhere without it and so on, you have to give people solutions other than telling them what they can’t do;

also the planes thing is.... honestly naive, in the sense that considering how the world works these days you can’t possibly conceive that people would not use planes unless you agree to basically slow everything down - how do you import/export fruit or vegetables without planes? in order to take a vacation somewhere farther than the next country over it takes everyone three days just to get there at minimum? I mean let’s say I want to go to the US from here, with a ship it’d take me two weeks which is basically what people take here overall when they take vacation time, which is a first world problem but let’s say someone has to go to the other side of the planet for charity or they’re a politician or a UN member and have to travel over the world fast, does it take them a month to go from the US to idk india by ship and/or train? like, with the way the world goes right now either we all go back to 19th century rhythms, which isn’t really feasible, so like maybe let’s advocate for planes that don’t pollute as much rather than DON’T TAKE PLANES and so on

like I 100% agree with the basics and I think we should all be worried and we should also like, try to make sure we don’t die horribly and that we don’t end up paying too much of the bill that we will have to pay, but I don’t think that offering solutions that are ‘DON’T DO THIS’ without the following ‘and let’s do this instead’/giving people actual alternatives/campaigning for alternatives isn’t really that useful because as you said someone who can’t take the bus to go to work will tell you ‘yeah and how do I actually go to pay the bills according to you’ if you only tell them don’t use the car rather than ‘don’t use the car and get the bus card for the new service we have where the bus passes every fifteen minutes at least’ and so on.

and like, I think that people should aim at a) protesting at how 85% of the pollution on this planet is due to either some few corporations and the fact that western countries pretty much throw their trash at countries who don’t dispose of them according to the paris agreements and so on, b) pointing at ethical consumption of things we eat be it meat chocolate coffee or whatever rather than saying DON’T EAT THIS, because intensive cultivations of anything eventually run bad and there have been enough ruined economies in south america. like, we should all eat/produce locally more and when importing food we should privilege ethically grown/produced food rather than corporation produced food and so on. like, the thing is that I see a lot of DON’T DO THIS without ‘and do this instead’ where the thing you can do instead is sustainable and actually affordable for everyone, not just by us westerners or people who can afford to take the bus and buy cheap fruit/vegetables and so on. two cents ofc, but anyway I agree with the general target, I’m just not very convinced the solutions offered are feasible.

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #idk how to tag this #politics tag #classism cw #i guess #Anonymous #ask post

[crowtold]

        -- HC. this is long time coming, but here’s a BIG hc post detailing deeper information about scarecrow’s group & businesses ( ie. what they do, their ranks, affiliates, business deals, y’get what i mean ) ! putting under read more ‘cause there’s gonna be a LOT to discuss here.

MAIN GROUP

offers various services for affiliated / neutral parties, all of which include;

illegal transportation between countries-- he’s willing to offer a passport, ID, money & a new life to those who can’t get it by legal means ( for obvious reasons ). though he keeps tracks of those he makes ‘ disappear ‘, it’s information that he keeps classified, out of respect for his clients.

contract killing / kidnapping / item hunting & theft / bodyguard jobs / torturing & obtaining information / etc.-- as long as he deems the job to be legit & sees the payment, he’s willing to pass on the jobs taken from affiliates over to C.O.R.P.S., where he assigns a team to a job & have them fulfil it. this service offer is pretty expensive, since the hitmen he hires are top-notch & efficient -- not to mention, the more difficult the mission, the more money he demands in return. but, given the high percentage of success, there are many satisfied clients that say it’s worth it.

neutral party between groups-- at times, he acts as a neutral party and / or witness for turf wars, when two dangerous groups butting heads and / or are forming peace-making pacts between groups, etc. his well-known apathy is largely the reason he’s entrusted this position, for he’d even sic CORPS on an affiliate & friends without a second thought should they back down on or break the deal that was made between the groups. 

money lending-- he offers the services to both, civilians in need for quick cash, or criminals who are in desperate need for money. the interest rates aren’t high in the least, part of why it makes the deal to enticing, & the debts can easily be returned ( should the other party be responsible with their spending ). in exchange, time / deadline extension ARE NOT tolerated in the least, punctuality being one of his trademarks. clients are warned ahead of time of the deadline, including a set time-- & should the debts not be repaid by then, well... there are ways to find out.

basically, rather than do crimes on his own with his group, his focus is more on helping / aiding other criminal groups do crimes with more ease, be it by lending them extra muscle, obtaining information & equipment they need, etc.

has villas in various countries that he’s constantly going back & forth from.

has made a deal with the local authorities / dirty cops, offering them information about his enemies ( & a bit of a bribe ) in exchange for them to look the other way whenever one of his men get caught. of course, that is, if said man is one he wants to keep in his group-- otherwise, they’re welcome to keep them, as he no longer has any use for them.

though he doesn’t have a moral compass, he DOESN’T touch the prostitution ( of both adults & kids ), human / animal trafficking, selling illegal drugs, gambling & money laundering side of the criminal world. it’s never clicked with him, & he doesn’t tolerate any of his men partaking in said activities behind his back either.

that said, they do take in the occasional runaway / orphan, sheltering them until they find their way home or decide to permanently stay with his group. the newer generation are their future, after all. it’d be a waste to let them rot on the sidewalk.

even though he has his own contract-kill firm, there are times where he hires independent mercenaries whenever his teams aren’t available ( such as people that’ve caught his eye, or people that’ve turned him down & preferred to stay solo ).

he used to do a lot of heists when first starting out his group, the money & reputation obtained from them being the foundation of what the group is now-- & he still holds a couple heists once in a while, whenever he finds something that catches his eye. he’s willing to have C.O.R.P.S. conduct heists at his affiliates regards, only if he deems it beneficial for himself ( aka, if he’s getting something good outta the entire thing ).

C.O.R.P.S. ( Contracted Organisation of Radical Professionals & Soldiers ) 

these are personal hitmen / mercenaries he’s hired. they work for him & him only, only taking jobs he passes along from his clients / personal jobs he wants them to take on. sure, though it makes it seem as if they’re chained down, they are paid extravagant amounts compared to solo / indie hitmen ( pay comes based on their achievements, of course ), are guaranteed a constant influx of jobs to take, & are presented with as many equipment as they desire.

C.O.R.P.S. members are personally scouted by him & colt, the two discussing whether they’re worth it or not before paying them a face - to - face visit. sometimes he asks the opinions of one of his higher ranking teams, ones who’s opinions he values in a high regard. after all, who knows more about mercenaries, than other mercenaries ?

C.O.R.P.S. is made up of different TEAMS of hitmen / mercenaries-- each team ranging from 3-4 members, with a single individual assigned as the group leader.

the rank of the team is decided by the quality of their work & the success of their missions. more efficient teams get more bonuses ( such as access to new facilities, better payment, equipment of higher quality & more ).

EVERY member has to wear a mask & don a code name. they are to remain completely anonymous to everyone apart from him & the rest of their group. for their real identity to be leaked / revealed to the world would mean immediate expulsion ( one with a heavy heart, as he does, in a way, care for them ).

agents are welcome to have a personal life, separate to their business life-- as long as their connection to C.O.R.P.S. isn’t revealed to the public and / or are going behind his back, he doesn’t mind what they do during their free time.

while he’s fine with in-quarrels & an accidental friendly fire ( after all, what’s wrong with a little competition / rivalry ? ), it is FORBIDDEN for C.O.R.P.S. members to kill each other, or anyone in the main group.

he has a secure building for C.O.R.P.S. teams to reside in-- each team gets the entire floor of a building. the higher rank the higher the floor ( & the higher the rewards / quality of their stay ). 

on the underground level of the building, there are various facilities for the agents to work with and / or sharpen their skills.

there are a couple private meeting rooms where each team can reserve for various reasons. as long as they sign in to the time tables to let everyone else know who is taking which room at each time, everyone in C.O.R.P.S. is welcome to reserve a room.

there’s an armoury, filled with equipment they can take whenever they want to practice or go out on a job. agents of every rank are welcome to take as many tools they wish to take with them. there is a room where only higher ranking agents can go in-- in it lie more rare technology & equipment, the type that are scarcer to get ahold of and are, in turn, special. the armoury is replenished every sunday at 6 a.m. on the dot.

holographic training facilities are also a thing, set up with the highest & most up to date technology scarecrow could get his hands on. in them, agents can train for various things in a complex fake setting; such as espionage training, bodyguard training, sniping practice, firing practice, close combat practice, & more !. all they have to do is set up the room to a setting, & it’ll recreated a virtual scenario that they either ‘ fail ‘ or ‘ pass ‘ based on the inputted settings. 

the vr facilities are in the lowest floor of the building, meaning only higher ranking agents are allowed in ( since, it’s pretty expensive equipment ).

normal training facilities are also a go ! there’s an entire floor designed as a personalised gym. agents can request specific machines if they’re not already there.

#( ☾ THE MAFIOSO // HEADCANON ) #oOF THIS GOT LONG #but also v important bc ! ! ! #it plays a bit part in his story and stinger's & colt's story too #i'm gonna link this in their bio's somewhere 'cause it's ! ! p important / a good way to learn more about what they do ! ! ! #might edit / add some stuff later on as i develop him / study more about the mob business but ! ! ! this is the basic of it ! !

[caffeine-catastrophe]

Go the Distance! CH. 2!

click here for chapter one!

A/N: Thank you so much for such a positive response to the first chapter! It made my day to see all the reviews. Please keep them up :) There were a few questions about what a grant is, and some confusion over the general plot of this story, so I will do my best to give y'all some context. The rest will be revealed later on in the story, I promise.

A grant is defined as "a sum of money given by a government or other organization for a particular purpose. ie: a research grant". The one mentioned in this story is being offered for the sole purpose of giving young people a chance to pursue their dreams and aspirations, without having to kill themselves working three jobs like the rest of us do in real life.

Some other things: the gang is about the same age, a year or two out of high school (in my mind, L is 19 - coincidentally the legal drinking age where I live - N is 20, and G and E are 21 ish). None of them are in college at the moment, because student loans mean interest and none of them really want to (or are able to) deal with the future repercussions of that. Their individual career paths and aspirations will be discussed further into the story.

I hope you like the second chapter! The next one is already done, so I'm going to finish the one after that before I publish it!

Go the Distance

Three days, four million dollars, and a cross-country road trip that will change their lives for good. OR: The Dreyar Grant for Brighter Futures is a prestigious scholarship granted to only the most deserving of candidates, but even miracles don't come without a price.

---

... And a thousand years would be worth the wait It might take a lifetime, but somehow I'll see it through...

"Thank you all for coming," Ms. Strauss begins cheerfully, seating herself at one end of the large conference table situated in the centre of the room. She gestures for the four trailing awkwardly behind her to take a seat on either side of her. Lucy finds it increasingly hard to concentrate as Ms. Strauss begins to brief them on the legalities of the grant. She hands her the envelope containing her high school transcript and photocopied version of her passport, and watches in a zombified stupor as the others do the same. "I'll send these to HQ in Crocus to double check your eligibility, but for now I'm going to assume you're all wonderful people and take your word for it," Mirajane continues in a humoured tone that does nothing to relieve the tension in the air.

"Now tell me, what do you four know about Mr. Dreyar?" Ms. Strauss asks. "I assume you all did your research," she continues, raising an amused eyebrow. Lucy can't help but think this is some kind of test. She exchanges a quick glance with the rest of her companions, each shifting uneasily in their seats. Erza seems to have disappeared into her hair again; even Natsu is looking a little bit less confident about 'having this'. Lucy waits for one of the other three to speak up, before looking nervously back at Ms. Strauss, who – Lucy notices with a jolt – is looking directly at her.

"Ms. Heartfilia? You seem like you might have something to say," Ms. Strauss says with an encouraging smile. Lucy bites her lip. She always was terrible at public speaking. You're a high school graduate with a theatre diploma and English honours, Lucy. Get it together.

"Mr. Dreyar is a so-called legendary business mogul worth approximately 64 billion dollars," Lucy begins slowly, glancing quickly at Ms. Strauss for confirmation. The woman gives her a small smile and Lucy continues, "He was an Ivy League student that originally wanted to be in law, but after a few years of schooling he had a change of heart. He dropped out to pursue a degree in business, and by the time he graduated he had sold two successful companies and had a net worth of 1.2 million dollars."

"Very good, Lucy," Ms. Strauss says, smiling. "Anyone else?" She looks over at Gray, who clears his throat reluctantly. "He never married but has taken in many apprentices over the years and treats them like they are his blood. He acts like a sponsor to ensure they become successful, and then takes a small percentage of their annual income once a year until he has been paid back."

"Not only that, but now that all of his so-called children have grown up and are able to stand on their own, rumour has it that he's looking for a new group of young people to mentor," Natsu jumps in enthusiastically, nudging Erza beside him, who rolls her eyes good-naturedly.

"Rumour has it, that's us," she finishes quietly in a voice that's tinged with equal parts exasperation and excitement.

"Rumour has it, indeed," Ms. Strauss responds vaguely, eyes roving over the group in what almost seems like approval. "Now, on to business," she says abruptly, disturbing the air of quiet anticipation that has settled over the four young adults. "Mr. Dreyar, while a brilliant man, can be quite… eccentric. Rather than handing the grant over to you at this moment, he has insisted that the four of you join him in Crocus in three days' time so that he can assess your eligibility in person. This means the four of you will have to acquire your own methods of transportation and lodging, should you choose not to travel there via aeroplane. Hotel rooms will be provided for you once you arrive, of course. He has written you into his schedule this Thursday at noon. Any questions?"

When Ms. Strauss finishes speaking, the only sounds in the room are the quiet ticking of an analog clock by the door and the muffled din of traffic outside.

---

The group is silent as they file out of the room en route to the elevators. They stand awkwardly as they wait for the car, each lost in thought. Erza is tugging on her hair again while Gray and Natsu furrow their brows in the same tense expression, which Lucy might've found amusing if she didn't also find herself so unbelievably screwed. No one says a word until the elevator doors open with a soft ding and close behind them with another muffled thump.

"So, we're pretty much screwed," Natsu echoes Lucy's thoughts, ever the spokesperson. "Flying expensive, and I don't know about you guys, but the reason I applied for this scholarship is that I couldn't afford to splurge on a plane ticket if I wanted to."

"Yup," Gray lets out stiffly, exchanging a loaded glance with Erza that Lucy can't quite decipher.

"However," Natsu continues, "I've driven down to Crocus a few times for soccer games in the past, and I'm sure my dad wouldn't mind us borrowing his van since there's a chance we'd be coming back with a total of four million freaking dollars." He sends a silly look in Lucy's direction, reflected in the polished gold of the elevator still counting down from 14, and she lets out a tense laugh. She takes a deep breath, feeling the tension of the group lift for a brief moment. "If you guys are okay with chipping in for gas money and splitting the cost of a few nights in a hotel, we could spend the next few days driving down to Crocus in time for the meeting," Natsu suggests, raising his eyebrows at the other three expectantly. There's a pause, and then Gray breathes a sigh of relief.

"I mean, that's actually a pretty good idea. I've got my license too, so I could take turns driving if you'd like," Gray offers.

"Same here," Lucy chimes in, and Erza nods in agreement.

"Does that mean you're in?" Natsu asks eagerly, turning to Lucy, who turns to Erza. The two exchange a look, raising hesitant eyebrows as if to reassure each other that going on a spontaneous road trip with two strange guys won't end with getting themselves killed. Girls need to stick together, after all. Then again, Lucy's been through worse and while Erza may look demure, she also seems like the type of person to kill someone in their sleep. Lucy sets her jaw determinedly and gives Erza a little wink. The other girl smiles nervously in response. The world spins a little as the elevator settles, and when the doors finally open with another soft ding, Lucy turns back to Natsu with a grin.

"We're in."

---

"This one's a little more out of the way, but it's a lot cheaper," Gray suggests an hour later. The group of four have made their way over to a café down the block in order to iron out their plans for the weekend. Lucky for them, Natsu had his laptop in his dad's car that's parked across the street, and they've all crowded around the small table in the corner of the shop, each trying to get a better look at the screen.

"Is it going to be safe, though?" Lucy asks concernedly from behind him. "Family-owned inns usually have lower budget security systems, if you know what I mean."

"Nah, it looks fine," Natsu reassures her, reaching over Erza's plate of strawberry shortcake to pull the laptop closer to him. "It's got a ton of reviews, and all of them say it's clean and relatively safe, see?" he says, pulling it up on the screen for her to check.

"We'll go with that one in Acalypha, then," Erza says resolutely, jotting down the phone number and address in the little notebook Lucy had stashed in her purse at the meeting.

"I can call them later tonight when I call the place in Hargeon to book the rooms," Gray suggests, taking a picture of the page with his phone.

"We did it!" Lucy cheers, flipping back to add it to the PowerPoint Natsu and Gray insisted they create in honour of their 'Road Trip'. Boys. "Looks like we've got it all sorted out then! Where and when do you guys want to meet tomorrow?" she asks, leaning back and nudging the laptop closer to Natsu, who's straining to get a better look over Gray's head.

"I can pick everyone up in the morning," Natsu offers, grinning at her in thanks, and her heart stutters at the easy way he leans across her lap to save the document and shut down his laptop.

"Around 10, then?" Erza suggests, chewing savagely as she stuffs the rest of cake in her mouth. Lucy is kind of surprised at how passionate Erza is about dessert. Never mind how gentle she usually is, she nearly tore off Gray's arm when he came close to knocking it off the table while scuffling with Natsu over the PowerPoint font.

The group confirms the time, each pulling out their phones to add each other on social media. The boys create a group chat with a reminder for their plan tomorrow, aptly naming it 'The Four Million Dollar Road Trip'. Erza and Gray live in the same direction, so they quickly gather their things and head to the train together, casting apprehensive glances at the overcast sky. Apparently, Gray is a last-minute packer and Erza admits to being that chick that brings four suitcases in the name of being 'prepared'. They need all the time they can get.

Natsu and Lucy, on the other hand, take their time packing up. Lucy is organized to a fault and Natsu doesn't seem to be too concerned about getting home right away, so they fill the café with their chatter until they forget that the sunshine surrounding them isn't coming in through the window. When it starts to get dark outside, the conversation turns to their homes and families. They are surprised to discover that they live in the same neighbourhood; his building is just down the block from hers. She learns his sister Wendy takes dance classes and sings off-key in the shower, and in turn she tells him all about her golden retriever, Plue, who used to follow her to school every day in the third grade.

By the time they are ready to leave, the rain has started and the lightning makes the sky look like it may have cracked open in the downpour. And if Natsu is pleased to hear that Lucy has forgotten her umbrella and may need to join him for the car ride home, well, he doesn't say a thing.

---

I based Makarov's backstory on Mark Zuckerberg lmao. He's a controversial person, for sure, but useful when it comes to needing rich entrepreneur character backgrounds.

Comments? Questions? Reactions? Drop me a review!

See y'all soon!

#fairy tail #nalu #gray fullbuster #erza scarlet #team natsu #fanfiction #IMaketheMonsters #natsu dragneel #lucy heartfilia

[teyuuka]

Hi! I've recently got into drama cds after randomly finding some of them online hahaha! I found your tumblr after searching r18 drama cds here [pre-purge :( ] I really like your translations and it really inspired me to start translating myself as well (though im not very fluent in Japanese lol) Do you have any advice for someone who wants to start translating? Thank you!!

Congrats! I’m glad to hear that my works have inspired others! I’m not really a fluent Japanese speaker either so translating is fun because you get to know and listen to the different speech quirks that seiyuus have and it’s cute.

If you want a seriously honest advice, translating isn’t easy and there’s really no shortcut, sometimes you really have to listen for like multiple times before you could understand what’s going on! translating takes a lot of time, and sometimes it feels like the end result wasn’t worth the time you spent, but here’s what you can do to lessen the time you take to translate:

1. Always have an outline

You may not understand everything in the first listen, but it’s not a harm to write down some important plot points in the outline. It will help you when you’re drafting the translations

2. Have some tracks on your phone for multi tasking

Since I know translating takes a lot of time, I try to translate things when I’m on a public transport like when I’m on the way to my office. It saves a good few hours of listening. Even if you don’t translate you can just transcribe or outline.

3. Pay attention to the conjugations!!

Sometimes the context may not be the best guide. You need to rely on the conjugations to tell you the meaning of a particular sentence because it’ll tell you who’s the subject and who’s the object.

4. Adapt to the destination language

Grammar structures differ from language to language. There are people who think it’s better to keep everything as close to the original one, but I digress. I mean yeah meaning-wise, but if I had kept everything the same with the original script, you’d see things like “My white liquid is going to be put inside you” in my translations. Not ideal right? Plus it just sounds weird.

I do admit I used to be like “I have to keep everything as similar to the original as possible” and I probably still struggle with that to a certain extent. In the end, it’s really about the balance and translating style though. I know some people will fully adapt into English that makes it sound native and doesn’t seem like a translation, which is good! There are audiences who like this style as well. But for me, it really depends. I don’t really want to fully change the sentences and the order of phrases as well, I like to keep some aspects of the original language visible to show the speaker’s thought process. For example, a recent tweet from Miyashita yuu:

「マスクしてる人がもしかしたら変顔してるかもしれないと考えたら震えが止まらない」

People can argue that the better/professional translation would be “I can’t help but tremble when I think of how people who are wearing a mask could have been making funny faces without us knowing.”

But I chose to translate it as: “When I think about how someone wearing a mask could have been making funny faces without us knowing, I can’t help but tremble.”, because originally the speaker said something about the mask first and then their response to it (ie. the trembling), as opposed to having their response in front (the first translation).

That said, you can see the first one is smoother and more native-Englishey than the second one which people probably can tell it’s a translation, but not too bad compared to a closest-to-original translation “People who are wearing a mask could have been making funny faces without us knowing, when I think about that I can’t stop trembling”

This got long but yeah there’s no right or wrong answer for this. Ultimately you will have to ask yourself what’s your translating style and work from there. I think most people would aim for the ideal “non-detectable” native English kind of translation, but I prefer to suck a little.

#replies #translation #long post

[chrysaliseuro2018]

Lisbon by Day and Night

So day 1 really in Lisbon and George had organised a free walking tour. Alex had arrived very late the night before so we all said a hearty hello in the morning. Alex is a a Canadian Aussie living in London and you don't get much more cosmopolitan than that. It was so lovely to catch up again. Some breakfast in house and then a quick sorty to the start of the tour which was not far away. Our tour guide was Joao (hard J ie Jow though he said he responded to anything including Joe) who advised he was 24 and a student of linguistics. Fantastic English, curly hair with the beard. He looked like a gentle version of one of those old Portuguese seafarers. There were 19 in the tour group and Joao was pretty engaging. The first half of the tour was reasonably devoted to various hints eg the practicaIities of negotiating the public transport system and insights into good bars and cafes and indeed where to buy the best pastel de natas. We also saw the funicular and various other sights including the view across the city from the Santa Justa viewing platform which was pretty speccy. The "hero" of the tour was an American cousin aged around early 50s who proffered opinions , suggestions, comments, questions and general observations at every opportunity. This was much to Penny's amusement and I have to say added to the quirkiness of the tour (there's nothing better than an eccentric). Joao stoically responded blandly to a regular and obvious stream of comments eg. when Joao was discussing one of the early (and most cool) nightclubs in Lisbon that his parents had attended which actually turned people away if they didn't like the look of you (unheard of in the 70s in Lisbon) our mate said you mean just like studio 54 in New York. A bemused Joao indicated that a lot of places do that now but it didn't matter old chum pressed on with his point till he felt it was made ( ie Joao thanked him for his contribution probably secretly thinking could the earth open up and swallow this guy) much to our amusement. Anyway the tour progressed. Mixed reviews. Joao I felt was probably catering for a youngish audience though split his tour in two with the second half devoted to a bit more history of Lisbon and Portugal. We did hear about King John (Joao - apparently every 2nd bloke is called Joao here) the 1st of Portugal (the illegitimate son of the previous King) who in the 14th century had basically saved the country's independence from Spain in a battle. Apparently he got rid of a number of his half- relatives to ensure his early access to the throne including his half sister. This was met with some voluble anguish by our American friend who was hoping for a happier ending. Also we heard of poet Luiz Vaz de Camoes, Portugal’s national poet, who died in 1580 and wrote Os Luciadas - Portugal's national epic poem about that country's achievements in the 16th century. Their national day is in his honour. This cove also had some legendary stories about being shipwrecked and swimming with one arm to the shore while the other held the draft manuscript of the poem above the waves. This was embellished by Joao (and via legend) with the possibility that Camoes also had his sweetheart on the boat but chose to save his manuscript instead. Also that he was reciting a new poem in his head and thought it was so good that he let the manuscript go as he preferred the new version he was reciting as he swam. Whatever the truth it was a good yarn and he was obviously quite a character in real life. Perhaps the most intriguing story was around the fall of fascism and the dictatorship in Portugal which finally happened in 1974. It also signalled the end of their colonial status. Joao had obviously heard a lot from his parents about life at that time and clearly read a lot which he relayed. Portugal had chosen to go its own way. It was neutral during the second world war and subsequently aligned itself with neither super power having no time for communists and no time for democracy. The dictatorship was still waging war in places like Angola to retain its colonies but more importantly the various mineral revenues originating there that supported it. Being not a particularly rich country its army was ill equipped to fight these wars and so the airforce was relied on to bolster it. This all changed when the Russians provide the Angolans with missiles which quickly accounted for the Portuguese airforce - end of the war. We probably got the simplistic version but it was pretty riveting. Just as riveting was how the dictatorship lost power domestically in 1974, basically overthrown by a small number of army dissidents who were quickly supported by elements of the navy and particularly civilians who quickly took to the streets as things changed. We were taken to the square where much of the action happened and it was virtually a bloodless coup. So these stories lifted the tour and we saw some interesting sights along the way though Lisbon ain't Prague. We generally liked the tour though voted our guide in Barcelona ahead of Joao simply because he gave us better insights over 2000 years+ of the history of the city. Joao was a bit narrower in focus timewise though entertaining enough. Amusingly at the end who should be providing him with a critique of his performance but American chum. I reckon Joao would have liked to reverse the critique but he took it in good spirit. At the end of the tour we quickly found ourselves in the neighbourhood of Alfama where lunch of sardines or octopus salad (the latter for Liz and Penny - gritty apparently) + beers ensued. Amusingly the table was at an angle of 20 degrees so Penny's head on the lower side was much lower than George's on the other side of the table. Vertigo inducing though the beers helped. It was the usual jolly lunch with everyone in good form and plenty of debriefing about our American tour mate. Waiter was a bit grumpy (wrong job) but all this stuff adds to the colour. All good and then Liz and I headed off to explore Alfama further and everyone else to wherever they chose. We basically walked around Alfama and other areas on the way home taking it all in. We had booked dinner for 7.00 (only time available otherwise we would have stuck to our preferred Spanish eating time of 8.00pm+) at the place we could not get into the previous night - the Cantinho do Avillez so that was the next commitment for that day. We all rolled up at home in the late afternoon Liz and I snoozed, the team had a few beers but by 7.00 we were at the Cantinho. Food was superb and we knew why it was so highly rated. Funky joint, friendly staff even had a stout beer. We ate amongst other things - exploding olives (soft and an immediate explosion of flavour in your mouth), octopus, tuna, pigs trotters, various tapas offerings together with great red wine. No wonder it got booked out. Despite the insistence on an early start by the restaurant there was no pressure to leave and so we trundled out around 9.00ish (can't remember). More drinks were required and we were recommended a venue by the waitress but opted for a wine bar suggested by our friend Caitlyn Box who lives in London "Jose Maria da Fonseca". Tables were scarce to come by though we secured a big barrel for us all to lean on and place drinks on just outside in the lane way which did the trick. We hoed into the red wine kindly donated by Alex and a jolly fun time was had by all. When we were finally offered an inside table we declined as we were so happy with our external spot on a mild evening. After an hour or so ( can't remember) Liz and I headed off and left the " kids" to play. They went to the place suggested by the waitress at the restaurant which turned out to be a bit dodgy and in a dodgy part of town strip clubs etc) so they ended up at the the local bar suggested for us by Joao on the tour. Turned out it was really laid back a bit like a house party rather than a bar. He said it was alternative. That tour is starting to look more valuable. George was home first around 1.00 as I had to let her in since we only had two keys and the others trailed in later (Liz and I were out to it). Great food, great wine even a good beer, great fun, everyone in fine form - a brilliant night.

[ancientbrit]

Natter #4    7/4/2020

MI MG Natter #4  4th July 2020I hope you all have had a happy fourth - all fingers still attached and tummies filled. Pickle seems to be getting used to the bangs this year, or perhaps he is a little deaf. Usually, at the first bang, he disappears and hides under my bed. This time he has wandered upstairs and downstairs and doesn't seem to register the bangs much at all - which is good.

I am in contact with a guy back home who runs a regular allotment (PeaPatch here) blog, giving timely advice and other information related mostly to veggie & fruit culture. I find this very helpful as he jogs my memory on those extremely rare occasions when I forget. I know you think that I never forget, but I have to admit that there has been the occasional lapse ever since I stopped eating peanuts. Strange thing that. His words for July remind us that this month is the time to sow seeds for Fall and Winter veggie crops such as Chicory (does anybody actually grow this?), Chinese Cabbage, Kohl Rabi, Lettuce, French Beans, Beetroot, Carrots, Radish, Turnips, and Peas - pick early varieties - early Snow peas are an especially fast to crop

.If you have had the forethought to already start Leeks from seed, now is the time to plant out those starts. The easiest way to do this is to use an old broomstick handle and thrust it vertically into the soil to a depth of about 5-6".Just drop the seedlings carefully, roots first into the holes and then just water in - that's all you need to do. The water will wash soil from the sides of the holes down onto the roots and it will remain cool and moist enough to thoroughly root the seedlings well. The idea of doing it this way, apart from the ease of planting and gaining support from the sides, is that the hole blanches the stem of the leek as it grows to gain more usable parts of the plant. If they are kept reasonably moist they should grow quite rapidly through the Summer and be ready to make fabulous potato-leek soup in time to keep cold days at bay. If you have never eaten P-L soup accompanied by chunks of Crusty artisan bread generously spread with butter - you haven't lived. Food of the Gods this! If you have been growing spuds and have lifted them already, you can follow with a crop of French beans to both nourish yourself and the soil, or if beans aren't your thing try a green manure crop such as Mustard. However, bear in mind that if you have ever had Club Root on your cabbage family plants, do not use Mustard as it is also a brassica. Use one of the Pea family, both for the Nitrogen root boost, but also for the foliage. And now for something completely different:- Once more my friend Valerie Robertson has presented her view on things English on the other side of the pond and is sent all over the world.

Val is a very  highly qualified State Registered Nurse who knows whereof she speaks.

Here we go.

From: Valerie Robertson GAG 14 Hope all is well with all. All Quiet in the Western Front over this way. Seattle’s CHOP was liberated leaving an appalling mess The pubs are open  today so the protesters have disappeared. BLMUK. is proving to be an embarrassment to those who donated, bent the knee and supported a cause that advocates the abolition of the nuclear family (that means dad is superfluous), defund the police,  destroy capitalism and support censorship plus the necessity for every white person to acknowledge that they are all subconsciously racist and privileged, and own up to the “fact” that every institution is inherently racist and disproportionally  White supremacy managed. That’s a big ask, which has bewildered the millionaire black footballers, academics & artists,   Labour leader Sir Keith what’s his name, (why would a Labour leader accept a knighthood?)  and all the national institutions taking the knee, which the other men in the street saw, as bowing to street fighter activists outrageous demands. Ie supporting racial divide and suppressing diversity of opinions and abolishing history. Our moral leader Canterbury Arch Runcton, is also confused. He’s a woke bloke that got it wrong at Easter. Streaming his Easter service from his kitchen with his toaster in the background. For God's sake, he must have a parlour with a row of books as a backdrop, in his palatial abode. He’s now having a think about the effigies in the Cathedral and wondering which ones to get rid of. Should he paint Jesus black?  Jesus loves all the children of the world, be they yellow, black or white. What about the brown ones?  They were precious in His sight too? He’s going to need a lot of colours. The Bournemouth beach sunbathing nutters are bright pink still. The Cambridge academia have just funded a two-year study into the history of slavery to enable the oiks to confront their iniquitous past and say sorry to all offended by history. Waste of time, as it’s been done before, over and over and you can’t change it. I’ve got a better idea for them to study.   Research the Benin bronzes. There are 3,OOO of them but only 500 left in Nigeria, the rest in Europe and USA museums. They are exquisite. The Portuguese kicked off the Atlantic slave trade in 1400 from the port of Benin with gold, which the Africans turned into these fantastic plaques, I think but not sure. I’m too busy doing my epidemic virus studies to go to the British Museum and find out. And we are not allowed yet, to visit Portugal unless keen enough to fly to Spain and walk across the border to check up on the museum artifacts in Lisbon. It’s good to see Lewis Hamilton constructively addressing inequality in the motor racing world.  The aggrieved black community can be placated and inspired by their own incredibly successful race if they listen. We have diversity, we have opportunity, we have laws, education, healthcare, social services, state welfare funding and overall, a tolerant multicultural society, who are very tired of the woke politically-correct champagne socialists agenda over the last decade.  There are deep social and economic injustices which are nothing to do with slavery or racial prejudice. Lewis Hamilton lives in Monte Carlo to save paying a hefty U.K. income tax liability. He was raised in Stevenage and lived in a council house with his family partially supported by the welfare state. Is he a philanthropist who promotes the welfare of others by donating money for schools etc.? No he’s not if he’s a British citizen tax evader. Is he a Monacoan now.? Is he a hypocrite? I don’t know?  Perhaps the academics can ask the uni students to research,  write a paper and make up their own minds. Estate agents will not in future be using Master Bedroom in their ads. Connotations of slave masters etc. Uncle Bens rice is to be repackaged without the jolly black man, Aunt Jemima also and awaiting more news re. MasterCard, Master chef, Master Mind, Headmaster ( the lefty teachers union still keeping schools shut) Masters degree, a tricky one for Cambridge. We are living with the virus and hanging in with our self-imposed restrictions and socially distancing. The copper masks and latex gloves worked a treat when John needed to visit the GP surgery for a blood test to check prostate antigen level insomuch not coughing. Although London has seen a slight rise in the R rate, no doubt due to the mass protests, the infection rate remains stable and patients being more successfully treated with drugs, to avoid intensive care. The disproportionate ethnic infection rate is due to blood group, genetic disparity, and body mass ratio, and a difference in the percentage of T cells. These cells decline with age and are responsible for fighting off infection without causing a major auto-immune response. People past 65, have very few left.   This theory explains why the young can come in contact with the virus but don’t succumb, however, if repeatedly exposed will catch it and manufacture antibodies and can still remain asymptomatic. Mass testing suggests that 40 percent of the population has been exposed with few symptoms, the silent spreaders who have the herd immunity. So we know the virus is still around and can’t trust the idiots to self-isolate if positive. All we can hope for is that they wear a mask and keep away from the elderly. Once the herd immunity and those who have recovered from it reach 60 percent, providing the medically vulnerable and fatties avoid it, the virus will find no host, cannot, therefore, multiply and shed and theoretically die away.  So it’s a balance. As the months go on there is hope for more preventive medication to alleviate the symptoms and of course a vaccine. Last October, the WHO  found that U.K. and USA  were the best in the world prepared for a pandemic.  Cameron had placed an order for millions of PPE equipment with a French company with the deposit to fund the manufacturer to make it.  By the time U.K. needed it, we got the deposit refunded but the stocks were needed in France and they had sold some items at a higher price,  to Italy.  That’s Globalisation for you and the free market. Meanwhile, a couple who were distilling boutique gin in the midlands, altered their equipment to distill hand sanitizers and viral cleansing fluids as NHS  were buying it in from abroad at an inflated price. They now supply the NHS cheaply and in the past 12 weeks have made 30 million pounds profit. Well done as they are donating a substantial amount to Covid research. No doubt as a tax saving incentive, but still commendable. There’s a lot to be said for self-reliance.  The govt. with its 80 strong SAGE - the Scientific, Advisory Government Epidemic advisors, have caused the pandemonium. At the outset, the models and graphs predicting the scale have been proved wrong. Simple precautions were overlooked.  Emptying geriatric wards, filling up care homes with staff untrained in infection control was scandalous. Mask wearing should have been made compulsory on public transport, supermarkets and shops at the outset and at least some sort of temperature checking and contact tracing at airports and ferries. So, onto local lockdowns and long term containment.  Boris is getting on with Brexit and left Hanlon to contain the virus,  Hope the strategy works. I have faith in the laboratory’s scientists and the trials and the guinea pigs testing the emerging vaccines. Meanwhile, tomatoes coming along, being well-nourished and in good shape and we are up to four playing again at croquet. Sainsbury delivering without hassle and Miles and Giles still surprising me with a tablespoon of Baharat in a nifty environment-friendly container. It made the lamb taste different. The kennels are open but missed the boat as all the  rescue dogs are  adopted and long waiting lists for puppies.

A dog called Nigger, I imagine a black or brown Labrador,  who was loved and died in 1878, had a headstone in the animal cemetery in a Sussex village graveyard. The local stonemason has ground away the name as the villagers thought it might cause offence to visitors and that dog’s owners would understand as they were dead anyway and not around to ask permission. Just love kind people. The drought's over and it’s cool as we are and hope you are too. Take care Love from Val And from your fearless leader,Gordon

[piesforjack]

LISTEN Y'ALL, HERES A CANADIAN COLLOQUIALISMS AND MANNERS GUIDE

because frankly i’m tired of the misuse of our colloquialisms/slang/vernacular/manners/habits in fic so it’s time for this canadian to set the record straight!!!!!

1. “sorry”

i feel like y'all really miss the boat on this, we (henceforth read as: canadians) say sorry ALL. THE. TIME. it's not a joke!! it's real bad!!! i apologize to furniture when i bump into it, y'all!!!! SO if you wanna give jack and ransom some real authentic canadian lingo, have them apologize for nothing worth apologizing for, not just in excess when they do something actually worthy of apology

examples (all based on REAL LIFE things i’ve done): 

*someone bumps into you* (even though it wasn’t your fault at all) oop sorry! 

*not having exact change in your hand when paying for something so you take a second to pull out a nickel* sorry!

*dropping something near/in front of/beside another person* oh sorry!

*asks for substitution or change to a burger or sandwich* sorry, yeah can i get this instead of this? (and have crippling anxiety while asking  just me? hoookay that sounds fake but!!!)

2. holding the door open

listen i didn’t realize how distinctly canadian this was until i was abroad for 2 weeks and felt the real switch from small acts of manners and kindness replaced with absolutely no fucking care in the world for any human that isn’t you. stairwells and doors and any form of public transportation are an “every person for themselves” kinda deal and it’s weird. i will always hold the door open if i notice someone behind me (if i don’t, you bet ur fuckin ass i apologize for not holding it open) 

examples:

even if i get to a door first, if i notice someone behind me i’ll hold the door open for them and let them go first. this isn’t even an age or sex/gender thing, people will do this for anyone, not just the elderly or the female.

if someone holds the door open for me, i’ll pass through and say thank you and if there’s a second set of doors (like in some bookstores and malls and stuff they have those little foyer-like rooms before the actual store) i will hold the door open for them on the second set. always.

3. “bud”/”buddy”

truly a canadian staple that does not get utilized enough!!!! i can’t think of a single person in my life i haven’t called “buddy” at least once, including my lil ol’ grandmother. though typically when i use “buddy” i’m cussing someone out (see examples below!) we sound particularly minnesotan when we say "buddy” which is why i think a lot of people think we have this ridiculous accent (because FUN FUCKIN FACT: the canadian accent is NOWHERE NEAR THE LEVEL OF MINNESOTAN!!! we. do. not. sound. like. that. only “”””bros””””” (typically hockey bros (see: sidney crosby) or “country” boys (see: literally any fucking canadian boy who hunts/fishes/wears a cowboy hat unironically)) sound like this, the canadian “accent” americans mock? totally fucking fake mOVING ON)

“bud” however, that’s a sweet lil thing. it’s actually very much a term of endearment, so to say, i’ve only ever used it when talking to children and s/o’s. it’s not the only term of endearment canadians ever use (ahem, fic writers take note of that) but it’s definitely one that people use and it’s very cute and soft™

examples:

*cussing someone out over a video game/a joke that i have no comeback for/bad driving/etc.* “get fucked, buddy” “oh you’re fucked, buddy” “yeh fuckin right, buddy” etc. etc.

*accidentally taps child on the back of the head* oop, sorry bud!

*s/o says “i love you”* aw bud, i love you too

AND THE RARE BUT SOMETIMES SOCIALLY APPROPRIATE: “BUDDY” AS ENDEARMENT ie. “aw c’mon, buddy, you’re doing great!” (this is most often done by (hockey) bros to children, but i’m sure there’s other situations where this happens)

4. “oop”

again, another one i didn’t realize was canadian until buzzfeed said so. but tbh i use this one so fucking much i’m so sad that i haven’t seen a single fic where jack or ransom use this. it’s like...oops without the ‘s’? that’s really it, but it’s not just for “oops” situations, it’s like a expletive for many things and you just kinda gotta feel it in ur gut, i can’t really explain how/why i know when to use it so tread lightly, but know that this is probably the most popular right up there with “sorry” in terms of usage.

examples:

*watching hockey, fave team almost scores* oop oop oop! awwww f*#$U$%*#$%*! (they didn’t score) or oop oop oop! YAAAAAAH HELL FUCKIN YEEEEEEEEAH BABY WOOOOO!!!!!!!! (they did)

*bumps into someone* oop sorry!

*surprise burp* oop sorry!

*fumbles with something, almost drops it* oop oop oOP!

*does drop something* oop.. *picks it up*

*dodging and weaving through a crowd* oop, sorry..oop oop sorr-- oop!

5. “no problem”

now my understanding is that this is more an age thing than it is a canadian thing, but i feel like in true polite canadian fashion this phrase gets used more and more by a wider demographic than it originally started with. this is basically a replacement for “you’re welcome” because imo “you’re welcome” makes it sound like you’ve done someone a huge favour for them, and i mean, it seems weird to basically say “yeah, you ARE thankful because I HELPED you so yeah BE THANKFUL!” when someone like..holds the door open, y’know? like i said, i’ve heard this is a generation thing and lots of younger people say this instead, so it could be more widespread, but not many other countries say “thank you” as much as we do, so. who really knows tbh.

examples:

*holds door for someone, they say thank you* no problem! (because really, it wasn’t a problem, it was just the nice thing to do and it didn’t cause me any trouble at all to do it. you don’t have to be thankful for this act of kindness but fuck u if u don’t say thank you for it anyway, buddy)

*works in retail, helps someone find something* no problem! (because again, it’s not a problem, esp in this situation it’s my fucking job to help y’all so like? duh?? but same rules apply, if you don’t say thank u i’ll fucking remember it, pal)

*works in retail, can’t help someone find something, customer has to leave/find something else/etc* “alright, thanks anyway” “yeah no problem, sorry!” (because fucking duh, you get it by now)

6. FUCKING “EH”

HOOO FUCKIN BOY WE NEED TO HAVE A CHAT ABOUT THE ATROCITY THAT IS FIC WRITERS EXCESSIVELY AND IMPROPERLY USING THIS TERM. here’s some things to fucking clarify RIGHT FUCKIN NOW: we DO NOT end every sentence with “eh”, “eh” is not always a fucking question, it’s not said how you think it is, “eh” isn’t always tacked on to any fuckin sentence.

okay cool now that that’s fucking out of the way...”eh” is more often used as a filler word, not always like an “um” or a “uhh”, more like a “hey” or a cheer like “ehhhh!” but it’s not as often used as people like to write it into conversation. as of right now i can’t even remember the last time i used “eh” when i wasn’t making a fuckin mockery of how americans THINK we talk. 

“eh” has different pronunciations as well, each one has a different purpose and place in speech. eh pronounced like “a” is usually a cheer (like “ehhhh!!! we fuckin won!!!), pronounced exactly like its spelled is like a question (like “eh? i can’t hear you.), pronounced like “ayy” or “hey” without the “h” is like a greeting or after someone burns someone with a comeback or ur fave song comes on in the club etc etc

basically, what you’re noticing is that “eh” is actually more widely common than you fuckin think it is. it’s not exclusively canadian, and YES!!! there is the stereotypical “eh?” or “eh!” that certain pockets of people will use, again it sort of falls under that hockey/country bro-ish type (to clarify, because idk if i did this or not, “bro” is a gender neutral term, girls or otherwise can also be bros, i use it neutrally, sorry if that wasn’t clear!) but again!!! it’s not used at every turn and it’s VERY unlikely that if you went up to a canadian with ur shitty “eh?!” impression that they would be anything more than stone-faced and weary at your attempt at humour.

examples:

eh, how are you?

eh, to-may-to to-mah-to

FUCKIN. EH!! (usually an expletive when something amazing happens, usually about sports, usually more specifically about hockey, but u knooow)

*making a decision that takes some thinking* ehhhh...maybe?

*hesitantly wanting to go past/around/through a crowd* eh...excuse me...oop sorry! oh go ahead..no problem!

7. bonus canada facts for fleshing out ur stories/hcs!!!

canada has our own football league, yeah i fucking know. all those tropes about jack and ransom not knowing football? actual garbage, they probably know the basics at the very least. if they like football, ransom probably roots for the toronto argonauts (whom most people fuckin hate, along with the maple leafs (hockey team) because canada has this *thing* with toronto, i won’t get into that right now but just know, majority of canada wants nothin to do with toronto sports teams) and jack probably roots for the montreal alouettes because duh (alternatively he roots for something hella random like the saskatchewan rough riders, whom, as a manitoban, i hate by birthright) some of the CFL rules are different from the NFL but yeah, canada has a football league so. kill that trope.

jack and ransom probably know something about curling and/or can actually curl!! curling, btw, is an ice sport where you throw rocks at other rocks (not like, just any old rocks, it’s...just google it honestly i don’t wanna try and explain curling) i know when i was in school curling was always a part of gym in the winter because we had outdoor rinks nearby or one of my elementary schools actually made a curling rink (with the circles and everything!)

“canadian tuxedo” is double denim. meaning, denim shirt, denim pants = canadian tuxedo. jack is 1000000% guilty of doing this.

canada gets real fuckin cold but it also gets real fuckin hot, especially in central canada but also other places too. jack being overwhelmed by georgian heat is probably real HOWEVER he’s not a total dumbass who can’t function in the heat. canada’s weather is a fuckin gong show regardless of global warming so like, jack will sweat but he will not melt into a puddle

yeah anyway here’s a list of obscure canadian things (and some that are just #90sKidThings) ransom and/or jack probably know/love aka me going tf down memory lane!!!: don’t you put it in your mouth,  stay alert stay safe, the talking tv that scarred me for life, “moooom aiden cut me half again!!!”, they probably believed north american house hippos were a thing for a long ass time because they didn’t understand the point of the commercial, tales from the crypt aka my fave show, the weekenders!!!, jack probably loved art attack because sensory things!! visuals!! calm voice!! basically bob ross for kids!!!, BEAR IN THE BIG BLUE HOUSE!!! HOOOMG, if you don’t know what this is I’M SO SORRY YOU MISSED OUT ON THE BEST THING EVER, ransom 100% had all the stuffies of these guys, out of the mcfuckin bOX, ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM, G2G OFF TO DRAGONLAND, you knew you were up TOO LATE if you were watching this, i could cry this show was so fckn good jack 100% loved this, idk if this was just a canadian thing but i fckn LOVED THIS ONE SO MUCH

honestly i could go on for fuckin ever but i’ll stop because god bless anyone who actually watches all those links lmao

i hope this was helpful!!! not tryna be a twat but i just wanted to clear some stuff up because i feel it’s my duty as a canadian to help y’all out, ok??? okay luv u bye thanks for reading!!!

#mine #canadian guide #here u go friends #enjoy i spent way too long writing this lmao