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#aaaah i liked these vids!!

fortheb0ys · 12 days

Note

No I think the nickname puppy is so cute wtf 😭😭 I love it frfr, I love nicknames sooo much

I love that tho, I don't think that's embarrassing at all. My boyfriend and I make ocs for I favorite fandoms all the time. We have cod ocs, Minecraft ocs, dbd ocs, and even Supernatural ocs ✊😭 I'm so fucking autistic fr, and I got more than those ones

My cod oc and our Minecraft ocs were huge hyperfixations, we talked about them for months. I even have Pinterest boards dedicated to them

Two years ago for my birthday he actually drew my Minecraft oc and posted it on Instagram

Now that I'm looking at his page, a lot of it is oc art and lore for the both of us

(because I think he deserves way more love on his acct and art than he gets, so if you want to see his @ is bones_the_cannibal_ but you DID NOT hear that from me)

I straight up used to cosplay a lot, I was Ticci Toby for Halloween one year, and I was Virgil from Thomas Sanders personality things 🥲 and with how big the cod fandom is, I think cosplaying a cod oc is the least embarrassing thing you could do in this fandom (unless you're one of the weird straight guys that just want girls attention and are shirtless half the time)

I think unmasked Charlie was very silly (/pos) and I love him ✋ tbh, I didn't even really watch your videos in full, just skimmed a few here and there, enough to see your knife skills and lil Philly, so you don't have to be too embarrassed, I didn't see much

Very glad I got to see him 💪huge L to everyone who didn't

-🥭

I do love nicknames :3 They were gonna nickname me Mutt💀 which Puppy's definitely better in hindsight.

Awww making characters with your bf is sooo cute😭😭 People in relationships who share the same hobbies/interests aaaah its adorable🥺 You guys sound so cute😭 THE CHARACTERS, PININTEREST BOARD AND THE DRAWINGS?!? *kicking and screaming* IT'S SOOO ADORABLE🙏 I LOVE WHEN PPL ARE IN LOVE🥹

I'll be sure to look at his account🫢

My siblings and I always were into the whole character making for fandoms. My earliest memories were my brother going on about his Resident Evil characters so it's no surprise I became the same. Pretty much every fandom I'm into, I have a character for it too😂

I used to cosplay more but adult life kinda took that away. I wish I could do it more often. I just liked making things. Trying to get back into it but it's so expensive🥲

Honestly when I see those straight guys who do the weird phone thrusting vids make me feel sick and the way they're catering to these girls toxic fantasies. Like wtf💀 I've seen SO MANY vids where they're glorifying abuse and people eat that shit up!

The cosplay/cod community kinda freaked me out with all that shit. Like I wasn't even a big creator nor did I do any sexual content and people would still say crazy shit to me. Like nope I can't so this🙅‍♂️

I just did tiktok cause my friends pressured me and that I could share my cosplays with them.

Lol you were the lucky winner to see that side of me and my horrible knife skills😅 Got to see my autism in full swing.

#the embarrassment has faded lol #i did think before #what if someone figures out both accounts?#and turns out you did lol #i told my roommate and he's like it's not that serious #☆*cj's inbox 📥#☆*🥭

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kithtaehyung · 1 year

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did basketball bro call us your lovely readers 🥺 glad he’s aware we’re your #1’s hehe btw i LOVEDDD the teaser 🫠

aaaah i need his personal spotify 🥲 hoping he has one dedicated to when he’s reading or out for walks cause man hit me in the feels with his rec! ryen do you have a playlist you listen to while reading? also 💍?

- is 🐱 taken?

Sdlflsld basketball bro so considerate🥺🏀 glad you really liked the teaser!

Oh shit wait you liked the rec, too?? Basketball! There are people that dig your taste🥳 if you got playlists on a private account, feel free to share!

As for me, I have a playlist for writing/reading but I need to transfer it to my kithtaehyung spotify before sharing🤍 It’s mostly instrumental/ost, and sometimes I just turn on a random lofi vid if I wanna have some deep focus. 🐱💍 is taken but 🐱 is not, so that’s yours :))

ANOTHER RING?? EXCUSE YOU🧍‍♀️bring the papers🤪

#rings on rings💀#🐱 anon #🏀 anon #asks:3tan #3tan9.5 #lovely people #*ryenfictalk #mailbox💌

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rrxnjun · 1 year

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I HOPE YOU NEVER HAVE TO TAKE THE BUS AGAIN CUZ THIS JUST SOUNDS SO ANNOYINNNGGG

I LOVED EVERY SECONF OF THE YANGYANG FIC BOTH CUZ OF THE STORY AND THE SONG CHOICES!!!! awsten being a guitar teacher is just such a weird thing imo like i would've never imagined that about him ngl :o but now i see the fic in a new light might reread it once more later in the week🫢

I LOVE LOVEJOY SOOMUCH AND ITS SO RARE TO FIND SOMEONE WHO ALSO DOES!!!! (THAT IS ONE OF MY FAV PARTS FROM THE FIC!!! LIKE THE LOVEJOY LYRICS TOOK ME BY SURPRISE) perfume is one of their best songs istg!! i'm so glad tommy convinced them to release it!!! i was(and still am) such a diehard mc youtuber fan;-; wilbur and tommys vlogs are just so funny!! i'm glad they led u to lovejoy cuz their music is truly amaziiinnggggg;-;

aespa are so amazing i'm so excited about their upcoming album all of the songs sound like such a bop!! U SOULD CHECK OUT BEABADOBEE I HAVE BEEN IN LOVE WITH HER MUSIC SINCE SUMMER SHE IS SO GOOD!!! I RECOMMEND HER VERY MUCH!!! AND I HOPE U WILL ENJOY HER MUSIC AS WELL

HIHIHI OFC I LOVE 5SOS🫢🥰 tbh when i realized how many of the same artists we both listen to i was like this person was meant for me💆‍♀️i love ur music taste so much!!!! and i will check out wallows cuz i listened to a couple of their songs before that were popular but i never really checked them out so thank u💞💖💓 (i'm an avid listener for both chase atlantic and the driver era as well🫡) wahhh i will check out baekhyun too i always see his name but i never listened to him!!! (and the way u wrote that made me laugh so hard, i hope u will win against haechan some day don't give up the fight🤞)

i'm so scared to recommend cuz they might not be ur taste in music😟buuttt some of my fav songs atm: kár by elefánt, macskák by elefánt, bálnák by dzsúdló, sprint by dzsúdló, na mindegy by carson coma, porszem my carson coma (and tbh i recommend anything by carson coma i feel like they would fit ur music taste the best if u happened to like any of these)

i may happened to be from hungary yesss🫣so hi neighbor🥳🙋‍♀️

(IM SORRY FOR WRITING THIS MUCH I KNOW U PROBABLY DONT MIND BIT I STILL FEEL THE NEED TO SAY SORRY - liebestraum anon💕)

I PROMISED TO MYSELF TO NEVER FEEL PRESSURED TO DO SO EVER AGAIN HAHAHA.

AAAAH thank u sm for saying that!!! awsten being a guitar teacher is a weird concept i agree but it strangely fits?? also i remember him saying he used to teach 5sos songs which made my heart so happy AHAHA anyways perfume is literally the best song ever and lovejoy slap idc what anyone says. tommy deserves the whole world for convincing them to keep the song i owe him my life AHAHA you being a mcyt fan is so valid of you. i had my mc phase when i was younger (mainly bc i have an older brother so we played together) so i was big on my slovak/czech mc youtubers back in the day HAHA but nowadays i dont watch many youtubers tbh,,, i WAS a big sidemen girlie tho DJFKLA i still watch their vids sometimes. also the uk commentery scene back in the day had such a chokehold on me that i still follow will, alex and memelous on instagram lmaoo

DID U SEE THE CLIPS FROM AESPAS CONCERT ningnings solo killed me. i love that girl w my whole heart and thIS ?? if they dont add the solos to the album im gonna riot

i havent had time to check up beabadobee but i promise to do so soon and then give u a report!! if u have any favorite songs from her pls send them my way!!

GIRL WE ARE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER our music taste matches so well what the fuck this never happened to me before AAA YOU EVEN LIKE THE DRIVER ERA????????? ross lynch was my first ever celebrity crush and im afraid to admit that he has the same hold on me now that im almost 20 than he had back when i was 9. i dont know ALL wallows songs btw im more of a casual fan but the ones i know are so good omg. also baekhyun!!! my kr&b king!! pls listen to his music he is such a good vocalist AAA (i dont think im winning against hyuck any time soon tho >:()

also im now listening to the songs you recommended so let me give you a live reaction. kár sounds very very vibey omg i love it actually ???? went straight to my playlist i love the synth?? macskák has very edgy depressed vibe i love it too omg?????? in my playlist you go. bálnák sounds like a nct dream b-side but in hungarian i stan. very very vibey. sprint has a very good beat!! its enjoyable to listen to but not really my vibe tbh. na mindegy is sO FUCKING GOOD WHAT ?? you were right this is truly my vibe i added this to my playlist too omg. porszem towards the end when it gets louder?? slaps. my favorites were definitely the first two and then na mindegy !!!!!

hello neighbor hhhh im slovak <33 (if you didnt know already bc i slap it to everyones face LMAO)

dont apologize for writing so much i really enjoyed talking abt music w you!!!!!! <33

#💌ask #liebestraum anon

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lee-minhoe · 1 year

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mel my love hi !! i´m finally here to reply to your message! sorry it took me so long!!

first of all thanks so much for the support! i´m almost done with all my deadlines so yay!

and aaaah i totally get it noeasy is one of my face skz albums too! i just love those songs so much (star lost? my biggest love) and same!! i love their title tracks they're always so fun and hype! noise music our beloved <3

and omg that's so funny i totally get that! i actually had that with ateez. i remember first listening to pirate king and thinking ????? no. but then a couple of months (? sorry i have no sense of time) later i heard it again and was like ?????? yes. why did i ever hate this ashjdfsfhgjk.

aah i see! i hope you liked the title/album! and yes omg that's so fitting ahjkdf. your love for minho truly is the cutest :(

and ofc !! it had to be taste !!! but it's valid so i'll accept ahsdkg. i recently finally saw a vid of them performing it and !!! insanity.

as for which groups i like, we actually have a lot of groups in common! nct, svt and txt are also loves ! (pls dont ask me to pick biases im very bad at picking favorites ahfjdskhg) and omg day6!! in love with their music truly. i've listened to the rose and nflying and i've actually recently been getting into xheroes and p1h ! i adore kbands (and bands in general tbh) so much!

as for girlgroups, i actually listen to a lot of them as well ! i actually haven't really listened much to stayc but they seem so lovely ! my faves are probs itzy, le ssera, twice, red velvet, purple kiss and billlie? but i'm probably forgetting some agskdh. i actually love a lot of soloists as well but i'll stop here ahsdkf

and yes thanks so much for introducing me to his fancams !! it was so fun ! and ahfjkdhkjf he's insane i love him so. also i think i actually knew that cam!! and ugh so true he's so good it's sickening truly

as always wishing you a lovely day/night and !!!! merry merry christmas! i hope you have lovely holidays full of love and laughter and peace and ofc good food ! sending you all my love ! *hugs* - 🌻

okay but ateez…..their recent cb was really good like im still obsessed with cyberpunk, new world, etc lol im looking forward to the cb coming up!! idk much about them but i feel like ive absorbed some things through my moots 😂 i had the same thing with ateez too when i first got into kpop, i was like idk if this is for me either but now with nct and skz noise music i think my taste has changed LOL. it’s so interesting how our taste in art (not just music) can vary depending on the timing of when we come across it

the taste performance was crazy let’s not talk about that bc it makes me so unwell HAHAHA (aka lets talk about it bc i am so whipped for that man). lee know in that silk shirt 🥴🥴 how did u like skz replay?? omg and the danceracha stage for gayo daejejeon on new years eve, i cant wait for that 😁

i looove day6’s music too, i think their songs and lyrics have this feeing in them that idk how to explain but it’s relatable, and it also conveys a feeling of hope? i like rock sounds in general which i think is why i like kbands so much ^^ do u have any other fav kbands or bands besides the ones we already talked about? (also fine if u dont lol we listed a lot already)

ooh i listened to billie’s stuff recently and i liked it a lot, i also like their concept and even like the album/track titles! and they make a whole separate album thats a soundtrack for their actual album?? i think thats so cool

i hope you had a very merry xmas and are having a joyful holiday season 💕💕 im excited to find out who u are soon hehehe <33

#answered #anon #🌻anon #stayblrss22

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nochuie · 5 years

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a 4 set of every member please!!!!!

I’m going through and looking at cuts atm, and for some perfs it might be a bit harder with lighting changes :c

#when i skimmed over the perf vid this morning it seems like i could do a 4set of each #but i think i might end up with a 9 set #aaaah idk #im gonna keep rewatching to try draft out these cuts #anonymous #reply

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agoddamnsupernova · 6 years

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Me, writing a oneshot for a fandom I’ve never written for even though I have SO MANY fics to update? Yes...yes I am

#i JUST #LISTEN #JUST LISTEN #I SAW A FAN VID AND IT INSIPIRED ME #UGH #malvie #mevie #descendants #disneys descendants #AAAAH #WHY AM I LIKE THIS #seriously #why

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zeta-in-de-walls · 3 years

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Aaaah... so Tommy’s mod videos. Considering they’re all chaos they are oddly good about having narratives and even the odd theme. Sometimes multiple stories crammed into a single fast-paced video. Plus even some continuity! We shall never forget Keith the dragon.

Tommy’s also always doing some sort of coming-of-age story in all the mod videos, he regularly talks about growing up and going through puberty and trying to prove himself. Wilbur is like his older brother and role model he looks up to.

The mod video with the strongest theme is probably the Lava Ravine Mod. In that one the theme is all about the inevitability of death. Tommy begins afraid of the lava ravine while Wilbur reassures him that death is a natural part of life. Wilbur and Charlie then go to find all the flowers to preserve civilization and to appreciate the beauty of life. Phil is trying to build a base that can protect them. As disaster approaches, Tommy gets more serious and tries to get the others to focus but Charlie and Wilbur get distracted with a game of Chesticuffs and Tommy concludes that they’re just trying to distract themselves from the oncoming doom. It ends with them hidden away in a little bunker, together with the few ites theyve managed to keep safe.

Other mod vids have themes too - the story in the dragon mod is about trying to fix Keith’s relationship with his wife but in the end she despawns. The black hole mod’s also kind of about death and uncertainty - less accepting it and more trying to escape. The sizechanger mod is about starting a revolution + justice.

Heh, I’m overanalysing but I love how these vids have stories in with ideas running through them, it makes them really fun to watch and even rewatch and I like the little bits of continuity they have, like they all play the same sort of character in all of them distinct from their characters in other content. It makes watching them more fun and helps them to really make an impression. It’s not so much a mineraft video, its a story with a lot of life in it. And they’re all well-edited whic really gives them structure and helps them flow.

#tommyinnit #tommys mod videos #analysis #idk #i just love them okay!#black hole mods editing is sublime #im still processing the surgery mod #lets says it overwhelming tere's so much happening and its incredible #its also funny ow in all of them you can see plot threads starting and sometimes breaking down #like the gas mod had tommys' grudge against charlie #oh and theyre all funny #and often very self-aware

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lemongingerart · 2 years

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yeah... I had this too overly sugar-coated fluffy scene in my mind for so long now, and these dark but festive days are the exact excuse to finally paint it out!

I actually had this one planned for the 25th, but alas, we got a visit from the little nasty virus. But despite of that (and when I wasn’t able to physically do anything - thanks to it - ahum - don’t wish for it though) I was still able to finish it a few days ago.

I waited to upload it because I just can’t get the colors right! I mean, if I see it on my screen, it’s okay, but it’s just not popping out. But when I start calibrating and tweaking it just loses detail? Aaaah! I struggle with that a lot, I’m not able to find the right balance yet. I did learn a lot painting/drawing this one! I loved the light sources and how they would interact with everything! The pose was a challenge too, but although the line art itself is definitely not my best, and there are still anatomy issues, I do like how they fit together? I think? Like, touching noses, giving a peck on the forehead, maybe something more? Wholesome fluff?

The drawing is supposed to represent Brendol’s study room in a slightly abandoned Hux estate on Arkanis. Both arrive looking for answers, and while it’s too painful for Armitage (he doesn’t even want to enter the room first), Miko is able to convince him to stay by just messing up the whole place, Miko style. She rearranges it from the stoic study into a cozy spot by the fireplace (it’s abandoned; no other heating), turns the huge portrait featuring bad family memories around and somehow suspiciously had smuggled good comfort food into the estate. Everything Hux would hate at first thought, but somewhere along the way, she got through to that thick emotionally constipated skull of him, and he might actually silently appreciate it?

They spend the evening researching, talking about how to find his mother, what to do with the place, and so on. About closing chapters and opening new ones. And maybe, just maybe, hope for a brighter future.

So... happy life day (or christmas if you like :-) ) and new year! I hope next year brings us happy and healthy times, may we live for our dreams and enjoy our time together!

Details and more text under the break

(oh, the saber is a easter egg (woops, wrong celebration), a reference to the alternative scenario for TROS 😏 I think it would be great if there are some war treasures hidden in that estate. Evil daddy probably had some crazy stuff to gloat with to the other empire officials.)

I honestly have the whole Arkanis part written down, but more than a year ago, so I should review it before publishing any of it, but there’s too much ‘vid in my brain now to function well 🙃 so maaaybe, if I’m not too ashamed of what I made up for this one, I might reblog it with text. Who knows. One day.

This is a slightly lighter version btw:

And lines:

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jeongwife · 2 years

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omg noooo :(( but aaaah so it’s basically a vid of chan in the anyone racer outfit </3

— 🌻

HHEGRGWGEGWHWHJIWJWKWJWJWJW RACER CHAN NO BUT I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ON HIS OUTFIT LIKE WHY IS HIS SHIRT SO TIGHT WHSJHWJA THE WAY YOU CAN SEE EVERYTHING BUT NOTHING AT THE SAME TIME ☹️👈💞💓🥰🚎🚎🙏😻☹️😻☹️😆🤩☹️😋🍓😞🙄💛💞💞😵‍💫🙄☹️👁✨🙏☹️☺️😃💔💔🚎🚎💔😭💔☺️☹️🙄👉😻🙄😃😞☹️☹️😞 AND THE WAY HE WAS LIKE “aH yEaH i ShOuLdvE dOnE aN ArM wOrkOuT” for my sanity please DO NOT!!!! SCREAMS PLEDIS CLOSE THE GYMS — lily </3

rail me

#🌻 anon #answered!#🌷 answers!

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lover-of-trash-and-people · 3 years

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shadow and bone rewatch s1e6 while drinking mid-range scotch

I wish I have a face that is as unlined and pretty as Ben Barnes' when I'm 39

Arken you dirty dirty liar

the face Alek is making at his lies that he knows are lies firstly because he knows the art of lying so well and also because he can read people very well

okay Ivan is kind of a bad bitch with his smirk at Arken's lies

alek's eyes narrowing and his little smile when Arken says 'im an entertainer' bitch I love this show

*grabs hand, pulls up sleeve, and discovers Arken's hand is full of marks indicating successful passages through the fold* 'well, that is certainly entertaining' I love this man with all my heart

him screaming is so fucking hot, is that weird for me to say

Nina being the Darkling's spy is quite interesting

Ben giving the Darkling crazy eyes when Arken owns up to his guilt is so cool

also wtf is Arken a fool trying to negotiate with possibly the strongest man in the world

kind of loved the darkness literally eating him

also love Alina learning to use her powers better when she is alone than when she is with anyone else, wish we got to see the cut in this season as per the books, ah can't have everything I guess

the camera pan to Jesper's gun at his side, amazing

god Jessie is literally so beautiful I need to see her bring Alina to the peak of her power so bad

netflix you better renew this series to let the plot run to its completion

HOW THE FUCK DID THEY CAST THE CROWS SO PERFECTLY

INEJ FUCKING TREMBLING JUST THE TINIEST BIT AS SHE BOWS SLIGHTLY TO ALINA SGSHSBSJJSJSSJ MY TWO QUEENS

'And where is my Summoner?' my little Darklina heart ouchie I really wish you hadn't used and manipulated her like this Alek it was incredibly fucked up especially considering you actually caught feelings

'Ivan and I won't fail you' oh Fedyor my baby, my angel, you don't deserve what is coming

Helnik literally recreating Titanic lmao stop this is a joke

I too would jump off the raft if I came to consciousness to see a gorgeous woman with magical powers with her hand on my back

omg but why is ryevost so pretty though

'I know exactly how she felt. The King's soldiers treated me the same way... I'm not myself today.' why must you do this to me, why must you fuel my darklina soulmates agenda idiocy

I don't quite think I have a problem with the Zoya Darkling relationship as much as I have a problem with the line they chose to reveal it to use with.

my drink's over and I don't know if I should have another, considering that it's 7 am

the tenderness with which he looks at Zoya and takes her hand and then when he says 'I shall relax when I have Alina' makes me believe more that the man that is reduced to tears time and again in front of Alina could in fact be the master manipulator I know him to be

god I can't wait for Zoya's character arc

'I speak six languages, it's part of my job' why is Nina literally the fucking coolest

Alina blinding the oprichniki was so hot, I can't wait to see more of her power and her ruthlessness

I know I've said it before but good god is Jessie Mei Li gorgeous

HER LITTLE SMILE AMONGST ALL THE PANIC AS SOON AS SHE SEES MAL, THE AUDACITY OF THIS SHOW TO MAKE ME FEEL THIS WAY

THE SCORE COMING IN AT THE RIGHT MOMENT, THEIR HANDS MEETING, HER SMILE AGAIN DHDHSBSNSNSNSNAN IM IN PAIN

REALLY?! YOU'RE GONNA GO DIRECTLY FROM MALINA TO HELNIK WITH NO CONCERN FOR MY HEART?

I simply cannot get over Calahan's accent lmao it's really funny

'im not afraid of you' he says to the insanely gorgeous girl with magic

HIM HANGING HIS HEAD IN DEFEAT TO INDICATE NINA HAS MADE VALID POINTS YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND I CAN'T BREATHE

'You're just a man. Like all the others.' she says and then forgets her train of thought looking at him as he strips. god I love this

not sleeping all night and then scotch is not a good idea, I think

'I promise not to ravish you' 'I hate the way you talk' her hand on his chest, his hand gripping hers, my fucking heart feels like it's about to explode

good god these shooting locations and sets are so beautiful

Alina throwing the flask at Mal and Mal going 'OI!' I fucking can't, I guess I am a

simp for childhood friends to lovers, give me more of that banter and childhood friend energy, I am thriving

wow it literally seems like they took book! Mal sl*tshaming book! Alina and made show! Alina sl*tshame show! Mal, hmm, interesting

'They would have split us up!' MAL'S LITTLE SMILE AT THIS, and the 'You wrote me letters?' Mal's nod, the Malina yearning stare, the Malina hug, 'thank you for finding me' 'always. I'll always find you.' NO MALINA YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU HAVE MADE ME ABSOLUTELY FUCKING FERAL

I understand they had to split time between my ravkan babies and the crows and that is why there were several aspects that were sort of not reflected on enough but Alina's training at the Little Palace, Alina's cut, Mal's personality, a teensy bit of backstory for the crows, maybe one lockpicking scene from my boy Kaz

random note: we have far too many idols and paintings and pictures and whatnot of Hindu deities in our house apart from the specially designed temple (we are Hindus, so maybe it's not that weird but it's a little weird)

Kaz's cane is a literal star, it's so beautiful my heart wants to explode

'Why would Heleen get the Crow Club?' *literally fucking gets up and walks aways instead of answering the fucking question* I LITERALLY CAN'T BREATHE I'M LOSING MY MIND

'I know that voice' WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO MAKE ME FIGHT FOR PLATONIC SHIPS IN FANDOMS

'We won't starve' omg get you someone who packs food for you when you go on the run together hiding from your ex who wants to capture you and use your powers as a weapon against your consent

Mal looking surprised at her summoning sunlight, Alina looking cautiously at him waiting for him to disapprove or run for the hills in fear or smth like that, 'I'm sorry it took me this long to see you... But I see you now' my dumb little shipper trash heart ouch

they really said we're gonna feed you this part asian couple as the protagonists in this show in 2021 and guess what I'm eating it's really tasty I'm very satisfied as a south asian

NINA'S LITTLE SMILE WHEN MATTHIAS WAKES UP WITH HIS ARM AROUND HER

'I can feel how much you hate sleeping next to me' 👀👀👀 BITCH SAID IMMA SPILL THE TEA AND THEN SHE DID

it's 8 am and guess what I'm getting another drink my parents have c*vid and are in govt qu*r*ntine centres there is nobody to supervise or stop me

I too say 'Why do you have to say things like that?' to my pretty crush when she flirts with me

Nina smiling at Matthias bragging about his conservative ways is my aesthetic

'No, it's not natural for someone to be as stupid as he is tall and yet, oh, there you stand.' MY FUCKING QUEEN

Matthias laughing uncontrollably at Nina saying something which isn't even that funny is a whole ass vibe

Kaz Brekker saying 'The Black General' ooh fuck yeah

YESSSS STEP OUT OF THAT CARRIAGE ALL SEXY BLACK GENERAL

isn't alcohol supposed to like kill germs? well, the amount in my system definitely will

I love my crows so much (always but this time particularly for setting that alarm in the stolen carriage)

ooh Polina recognising Inej by the knife yesss let's go writers

this Ivan Jesper showdown is all I needed from life and yet did not know about

Ivan taking off his cloak was, um, sexier than I wanted it to be

I just realised how thirsty I am going to sound in this post

'Has no one told you that keftas are Fabrikator-made and resistant to bullets, hmm?' 'Oh, I do love a challenge' LITERALLY EVERYTHING

im sorry to be pointing out flaws in a perfect show and adaptation but the line delivery on 'You robbed me of my brother, now I'll rob you of your life' from Polina was kind of weak

'You're a-' *gets knocked out with the back of a gun* LMAO we love the hints

got excited at the prospect of kaz v. zoya until I realised they will not be letting the opportunity of kaz v. darkling pass up

my goodness is Amita Suman a splendid actress

I AM NOT KIDDING WHEN I TELL YOU I SQUEALED WHEN I SAW DARKLES EMERGE OUT OF THE SHADOWS IN FRONT OF MY BABY BOY KAZ

THERE BEING ACTUAL FEAR OR ATLEAST DOUBT ON KAZ'S FACE, THE LITTLE BACK STEPS AS

THE DARKLING WALKS TOWARDS HIM, AAAAH I CAN'T

THE DARKLING STOPPING AT KAZ SAYING 'SHE FLED ON HER OWN' AND THE HINT OF TEARS THAT WE SEE IN HIS EYES

'IT WAS PRETTY CLEAR SHE WASN'T INTERESTED IN BEING A CAPTIVE ANYMORE' YOU TELL HIM, KING

*ACTUAL FUCKING TEARS IN THE DARKLING'S EYES AS THE SHADOWS APPROACH*

NOT ME YOWLING LIKE A HYENA THAT THIS CHILD OUTSMARTED THE MOST POWERFUL MAN IN EXISTENCE WITH A FAKE MAGIC TRICK

'Are you sure you added enough cloves?' literally warranting a wide ass smile from my queen Alina making my entire fucking day

for some reason, no matter how much I push it from my mind, Ben Barnes dressed up as the Darkling, dancing to 'push it' keeps coming to mind, it's absolutely ridiculous

I got somehow distracted with interviews but good things came out of that as it gave my body the time for the booze to kick in

and I would just like to say that I love Leigh for all she has given me

Alina is so fucking compassionate, I have no much love for her. I can feel her guilt and her sorrow as Mal talks of Mikhail and Dubrov

don't particularly like how the stag plotline is woven in, could have been executed better

'You're afraid you might start to like me?' *flaps furs like a bird's wings in frustration*

'I DO like you' my fucking heart you idiots

the sexual tension is so palpable and the moment is so intimate I simply cannot

OMG SHE FUCKING FELL

that moment where you think he might let her fall despite having read the books and he doesn't and he tells her his name I- <3

YOU DARE TRANSITION FROM A HELNIK SCENE TO A KANEJ SCENE YOU REALLY HAVE NO MERCY FOR MY HEART HUH

people have talked about this endlessly but Freddie's little jaw tic after he says Inej because Inej is wounded and he can't physically bring himself to help her I fucking cannot

THE MUSIC PICKING UP AS KAZ LOOKS TO THE DARKLING'S CARRIAGE I CAN'T WITH THIS SHOW ANYMORE

and now for one of my favorite scenes in television and cinematic history, David Kostyk throwing a book at Jesper Fahey without even knowing who he is merely because he opens the door of his carriage and says hello to him before getting knocked out by Kaz Brekker while trying to run away

Immediately followed by another, the scene with David Kostyk raising his finger to put forward his point in front of the Darkling and the Darkling trying to let him know he doesn't have to before obliging is one of my favourite scenes in the world

also sir please stop being devastatingly attractive in your glorious appearance with your face and your black kefta and cloak because all that comes to mind is Ayesha Erotica's Emo Boy and I'm afraid that is terribly inappropriate.

'No, you look great.' *literally looks down from embarrassment or blushing* MALINA RIGHTS?

THE LOOK ON THE DARKLING'S FACE BEFORE HE SAYS 'NO ORDINARY TRACKER, NO ORDINARY GIRL' BITCH IM OUT OF BREATH

'ORPHANS OF KERAMZIN, REUNITED.' 'ADORABLE.' HE FUCKING SNEERED IRL I FUCKING CANNOT

GOD IT'S SO GOOD

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dat-town · 4 years

Text

bad attitude

Characters: boxer!Juyeon & You

Setting : your typical YA “bad boy” romance, inspired by his GenZ vid (and I kind of wanted to drop hints of the Ares & Aphrodite dynamic but I’m not sure I succeeded)

Summary: He looked like trouble walking on long legs. The kind of guy your parents would want you to stay away. And yet, not even the blood on his knuckles or his cold words biting like bullets can scare you away. Because Juyeon isn’t as bad as he thinks he is.

Warning: mentions of violence, implied sexual content and some guys not getting the hint to f*ck off

Words: 7k

You winced.

You weren't even the one being hit and yet, the thud of punches soared through your whole body.

You'd never liked violence, not even fighting sports like this, and gosh, you regretted letting your best friend drag you with herself. Just because she had a crush on a boxer or MMA fighter or whatever, it didn't mean you had to support all her choices and out-of-character behaviour like paying a visit to a match. But she was determined and you were a good friend, so of course, you accompanied her. You wouldn't have let her go alone to this suspicious place called Dungeon probably filled with sweaty, muscly and aggressive guys. Although in reality, it was different from what you had imagined. A lot more professional and civilized for sure. But it didn't mean you liked it. At all.

"Minjung-aaaah, how long do we have to stay here? Your guy has already beat someone," you whined because even though it felt as if you were out on a basketball match, still the witnessed violence, the blood splattered on the ground of the ring because of the gloveless fight and aggressive yelling from time to time made you feel uncomfortable in your skin.

"Until the end, silly, there's an after party we are invited to but come on, there's only one match left and I heard it's the most anticipated one," she tugged on your arm even acting cutely to convince you to stay a little more and even though you groaned, you stayed put. Oh the things you did for her, you thought but it was lovely to see her smile so bright.

"And now, the highlight of tonight... Let's applaud the current champion Leeeeee Juyeon and the challenger Kiiiiim Hongseok!" the announcer yelled into his mic and the audience roared. However, you paid more attention to the approaching, freshly-out-of-the-shower guy and kept nudging Minjung in the side, so she would notice him, too. She only did though when he arrived right next to you.

"Oh hey Sunwoo," she smiled at the redhead unconsciously playing with the banner in her hand that she had brought in support of the boy. You found her shy actions cute.

"Hey girls, I'm glad you could make it," the fighter flashed a boyish smile at Minjung. Your friend had already spent nights telling you all about how much she liked the way his eyes sparkled or the way his lips tilted when he smiled, so even though you had never met the guy before, his appearance didn't shock you at all and in all honesty you thought they would have looked nice together. Also even though they were eyeing each other very obviously they engaged you in their small talk as well, so you didn't feel like a miserable third-wheel.

"Juyeon is my friend and he is like really good," Sunwoo added when the match was about to start and he pointed at the guy wearing a white tank top and royal blue bandages around his knuckles. His ink black locks fell into his feline eyes and he really did look like a predator the way he circled around his competitor.

It was pretty high tension, everybody held their breath waiting for the first attack but it came so suddenly that you almost missed it. It was like a viper's strike: quick and deadly. The other guy stattered back, blood dripping from his mouth already. But then it got faster and more aggressive but you could tell it was the bloody faced one who started to lose his patience. There were hits and punches and you really didn't understand the pointing system no matter how Sunwoo kept narrating and explaining, but one thing you knew was that the match had come to an end of the match when the coal haired guy knocked out the other. Loud cheering erupted in the warehouse and the winner was awarded before the crowd started to dissolve. It was only then when you noticed how fast your heart hammered due to the adrenalin. You still didn't like it though.

"Imma get the guys but meet you there, girls," Sunwoo grinned at the two of you, and you have never seen Minjung so enamoured. She gushed all about him on your way to the nearby club and even when you got seated in a booth once you got yourself cocktails. She was in the middle of a self pep talk convincing herself to ask the guy out before the night ended when the guys showed up. Sunwoo, his roommate Chanhee whom you have also heard of, someone named Hyunjoon and Juyeon from the ring.

At first, you didn't recognize him. This time he wore blue jeans instead of sweattracks, a black shirt and a leather jacket over his lean biceps. One of his cheeks was puffy under his eyes and he had split lips but other than that, he looked unaffected by the fight before. That deadly glare was missing from his dark eyes as well. He merely looked a bit cold and uninterested. Even when Sunwoo took it upon himself to introduce everyone. He barely glanced in your direction, not even when your best friend found it necessary to tell everyone that you were modelling for a living beside university.

“My father told me to put my pretty face to some use,” you shrugged and you were glad when the guys moved on from the topic after a good laugh. Even though you had grown to love your job, as a model you faced quite a lot of prejudice about being nothing but a shallow beauty, so you didn't really like to talk about it.

Throughout the evening Juyeon was quiet too but you couldn't help glancing his way a few times. He let others do the talking but the way he made sure to pour less alcohol into Hyunjoon's glass who was tipsy after a can of beer made you smile to yourself behind your cocktail.

At one point Minjung and Sunwoo left to dance and Hyunjoon managed to drag Chanhee along too, so you were left alone with 'the toughest guy of all' as Sunwoo jokingly called Juyeon earlier. He didn't look that scary now though.

"Does it hurt?" you pointed at his face which seemed to surprise him, not expecting you to speak up or at least not by bringing something like that up.

"I've gotten used to it," he muttered while looking straight into your eyes, a pair of coal irises boring your yours and he just shrugged.

"So it does," you hummed not really knowing what to do with his nonchalant behaviour. You weren't used to this. Some guys became bashful once they met you, some fanned over your beauty that always made your mother happy or even if they were more collected than that, you could always tell from their eyes that they were awed by your appearance at least a bit. But Juyeon? He didn't seem to care at all.

It was a relief, to be honest to not be put under the spotlight merely due to your pretty features. Sure, you earned good money thanks to your luck for having been born this way, so you shouldn't have complained but with being pretty came the expectations and everyone treated you like a doll and truth to tell, you wanted them to not only look but see you for real as well. Maybe that was why you were certain that the fighter had more to him as well but he wasn't an easy one to crack.

You asked how he knew Sunwoo (they went to the same gym), whether he felt pressured to keep his first place (he didn't care much about ranks, he just hated to lose) or whether he had always wanted to become some sort of athlete (that was merely what he was good at) and he kept giving curt answers. Yet, he didn't seem bothered by your questions, he jugged down his beer slowly in the meantime.

“I'm getting another round,” you proclaimed, getting up with a rum-flavoured smile on your rosy lips and you walked up to the counter to order another cocktail for you and beer for Juyeon. On the dance floor, you caught the vague image of Minjung and her boy, so you smiled and someone just had to be there to misunderstand…

“Like what you see, pretty? Want to join me for a drink?” Some guy at the counter directed his slurred question at you. You politely rejected his offer, telling him that you had company waiting for you but the guy didn't seem to understand your intent. Quite the opposite. “Oh come on! Are you trying to play hard to get? Don't be like this. Let oppa pour you a drink,” he cooed and unexpectedly grabbed you on the waist pulling you closer.

“Let go of me!” you whisper-yelled at the guy since you didn't want to earn pitying glances or draw too much attention. But it seemed like he didn't understand from simple, nice words.

So you were just about to threaten him by telling him he could get kicked out of the place for such harassment when someone grabbed the guy's wrist, prying it off you. You looked up surprised to see those wicked dark eyes back while rubbing your side where that douchebag had held you.

"She told you to leave her alone. Do you have problems with your hearing?" Juyeon asked through gritted teeth and his whole aura radiated power. You were surprised that the drunken guy dared to go against him but maybe it was due to liquid courage.

"What? Are you her boyfriend or what? Fuck off, dude."

"It doesn't matter who I am, I can break your wrist nevertheless," Juyeon warned the guy but when he didn't listen, he indeed twisted his arm behind his back until he yelled for mercy.

"That's enough. Let's go," you put a hand over Juyeon's shoulder, feeling the tense muscles underneath, trying to reason that he shouldn't get into trouble. He shot you a glance, a displeased one but didn't object. He let go of the guy, who stumbled backwards.

Drinks long forgotten you let Juyeon lead you away from the crowd, a little further to the corridors and you felt strangely safe with the guy's big hand resting barely over the small of your back.

"Thank you," you whispered when you were away enough for it to be heard over the music. The guy didn't seem to expect such gratitude but he acknowledged it with a firm nod, hair falling ahead into his pitch dark eyes.

"Do you want to go home?" he asked hoarsely and you gave it a thought. You didn't want to leave Minjung alone but she seemed to have good company and while you could have pretended being alright, not shaken up at all but one scene like this brought back many memories of other accidents and you just lost your party mood.

"Uhm yeah," you murmured and let Minjung know about your decision. Sunwoo also promised that he would make sure she got home safe and sound, then you got ready to leave. When you told Juyeon that you didn't mean to ruin his night and he shouldn't worry about you, he just shrugged.

“I needed an excuse to leave anyway. Let me walk you home.”

“You don't have to. I'm not a damsel in distress,” you protested immediately because even though you appreciated his concern, you also hated nothing more than being treated as weak. Even your steps halted once the fresh night air hit you in the face outside of the club.

“And I'm not a caveman,” Juyeon retorted and gosh, if it was his way of saying that he could act like a gentleman, it was pretty funny coming from him.

“Tells someone who beats people up for a living. Pretty Neandertal if you ask me,” you raised a brow challengingly but playful and it took a moment or two, him staring at you in disbelief, blinking before his lips trembled and his surprised chuckle morphed into a smile. The first genuine smile you had seen on him and wow, it was beautiful. The way his lips curled upwards and his eyes got narrow. Unlike his overall cold behaviour, it felt warm, it made your chest feel bubbly and hot.

“Fair point,” he noted but you didn't say a word when he walked next to you on your way to the bus stop.

"Does it happen a lot?" he asked quietly at one point almost as if he wasn't sure he had the right to ask but you understood his reason. You weren't even fazed by that douche, that must have been suspicious.

"I have gotten used to it."

"So it does," Juyeon mimicked (mocked?) your earlier words about his pained cheek.

“I work in an industry where things like this happen often. Don't worry. I'm a big girl, I can take care of guys who think with their dicks,” you claimed and the guy pressed his mouth into a firm line. He seemed a bit impressed by your attitude.

The rest of the walk and the bus ride was quiet. You didn't mind though, it wasn't the uncomfortable or awkward kind. It was an understanding one. Pretty nice.

“So that's me,” you said, pointing at the apartment block in which you shared your flat with Minjung. Juyeon looked around, alert eyes taking in the surroundings before acknowledging your answer with a nod. He really wasn't talkative and standing there, in front of the gates in all black, he reminded you of stray cats, careful and reckless all the same.

“I will see you around, I guess. Don't forget to put ice on that,” you pointed at his puffy cheek and he grinned at that. Hands deep in his pockets, leather jacket loose on his shoulder, he turned around once you set your foot inside the building.

But he didn't leave your thoughts that night.

Next day, you would have expected Minjung to be sleepy and whiny like she usually was in the mornings but she was already up by the time you went out to the kitchen. It should have been suspicious but you only realized the reason behind her giddiness a bit later.

“Soooo you and Juyeon...” she singsonged while putting coffee in front of you and you couldn't hide an amused smile in disbelief. Of course, she had to bring that up.

“There's no me and Juyeon.”

“Little birds told me you talked all night and he even walked you home,” your best friend continued making it sound like a cheap American movie because of her intonations.

“Well, I hope your birdies told you that nothing happened,” you snickered playfully because honestly, you didn't want her to get the wrong idea. It was unlikely that anything would come out of it and you weren't sure you wanted that anyway. Sure, Juyeon had this aura that attracted people and you had felt your blood rush when you had locked eyes. Not to mention that yesterday was probably just him being nice without any hidden intent. Actually you would have hated it a bit if he had expected anything in exchange for his unasked courtesy. So in your books, him walking you home and then leaving just like that was actually a good point.

It was Minjung who seemed disappointed.

“A shame. He's hot,” she pouted at which you raised a brow. She laughed it off. “What? Just because I like Sunwoo, I can admit that his friend is hot.”

“You know I don't care about looks and I'm not having casual sex with a friend of your future boyfriend,” you said firmly, tone playful by the end, wanting to get back on her because of her teasing. But it seemed like she took your words seriously as she corrected you almost nonchalantly.

“Present tense.”

“What?” you blinked, hopeful.

“I mean I guess it's official. We are having a date on Sunday,” Minjung admitted with a bright smile, practically beaming and now you could understand where her sudden awakeness came from.

“Yah, and you waited this long to tell me!” You hit her on the back, demanding details while both of you minched on slightly overburnt toasts.

With Minjung and Sunwoo dating, their circles of friends hung out regularly and that meant that you met Juyeon quite often. The more you got to know him, the more you realized he was the actions over words type of guy and he never did anything halfassly. He was very competitive, you jokingly called him Neanderthal for that too but he didn't seem to mind. He merely got back at you, calling you princess whenever you complained about something and you wouldn't have admitted it out loud but even that kind of nickname sounded pleasing as it rolled off his tongue.

But the truth was, you were really different, it was obvious from the very beginning. You didn't need a very tipsy Hyunjoon to tell you that Juyeon used to be wary of you, thinking you were a brainless chick because 'who else would go for modelling'. It stinged despite knowing that he had changed his mind since.

“He has been a changed man since you talked,” Hyunjoon giggled, obviously exaggerating but you just nodded along, telling him it was time to go home.

To be honest, you weren't different either. Before meeting Sunwoo and his friends, you didn't have a too good of an opinion on those who earned money from fighting. You thought that those who did must have been aggressive muscle-heads outside of the ring as well.

But your differences weren't just about the stereotypes. From what you had gathered, Juyeon prefered action movies while you liked comedies. He always wore dark clothes while you had barely anything but light and pastel colours. He drank bitter beer while you opted for sweet cocktails. He was a night owl, you were a morning bird. His go-to coffee was black, yours was latte with whipped cream. He prefered silence, you on the other hand liked talks about nothing and everything. And even though you didn't know him too well, you used these differences to convince yourself that it wouldn't work out anyway so why bother trying. At least, according to Minjung you used these as excuses for not making a move.

It was nothing but a crush, it would go away, you told yourself but oh, you were just a butterfly drawn to the flame recklessly close.

After one of his matches, Juyeon was taking longer than usual, and the guys were pumped up over Sunwoo's glorious win, so they weren't too patient. You sent them off, promising to go after them with Juyeon because you didn't mind staying behind even if it meant missing out on the first few rounds of alcohol. But since Juyeon gave no sign of himself, you made your way backstage with the pass you got from Hyunjoon to check on him. Knocking on the changing room door, you could hear him grumbling something, probably thinking his visitor was one of the guys.

“It's me,” you mumbled as you opened the door but the sight that welcomed you made you freeze on the spot. The floor was scattered with green glass pieces, remnants of a soju bottle and there was blood too, carmine dots colouring the white tiles.

“What the he- What happened?” you looked around, shocked after you closed the door behind you. The place looked like there was a scrummage over there.

“Someone's a sore loser,” Juyeon muttered, anger dripping from his words while he held his hand under running water over the sink in the corner. The way he gritted his teeth you could easily tell that he was in pain. His blood coming from his lower arm and back of the hand painted the water pink, so you could understand why. You decided to pay more attention to that, rather than the asshole who attacked him off-ring.

“Do you have a first aid kit? I'll help,” you offered because bandaging his hurt hand with the other wouldn't have been easy, not even for someone who seemed experienced in taking care of his own injuries.

Juyeon looked suspicious though, at least at first, not getting how you would know anything about treating wounds.

“I have a licence, duh,” you rolled your eyes. You had been trained for emergency situations on the road, so a few cuts should have been okay. So when Juyeon sighed, you took it as a sign of agreement, so you gestured him to sit on the bench and after you got the first aid kit ready, you sat next to him.

As you took his hand in yours, you felt his rough knuckles and fingertips against your soft skin and neither that, nor his breathing against your ear didn't help you to focus. But somehow you still managed to do it, smoothing bandages over the wounds gently after you cleaned them and covered them with antiseptic. Luckily they weren't too deep but since it wasn't a simple papercut you were sure they would heal slower and wouldn't go away without a trace.

“Done,” you announced with a smile on your face and pride in your voice, soothing a thumb over Juyeon’s wrist mindlessly as if you were trying to ease his tensed nerves. “It's going to leave an ugly scar though.”

“I'm not pretty anyway, so it doesn't matter,” the boxer muttered, probably used to having scars all over and you had this urge to tell him that even with purple and green bruises blooming all over him like flowers you would have found him beautiful.

Only when you looked up, searching for his night-like eyes on you, you noticed how close you really were. Sitting side-by-side, knees barely but touching, you could see his facial expressions better than ever before and it would have been so easy to lean in and just… You weren't sure what but a moment was enough for you to feel overwhelmed under his intense stare.

It really wasn't that he was hot with his wide shoulders, strong arms, hands so big or with those feline eyes holding black holes and lips thin but attractive. What drew you in was the burning passion in his eyes, the way he looked when he was focused and that he seemingly didn't give a fuck about what others thought of him.

And now he was looking at your with unadulterated want and curiosity in his wild eyes and it shook you to the core.

“Isn't this the part you should tell me that I should see the other guy?” you whispered, playfully, not being able to get out what you really wanted to say about him being pretty no matter what he thought.

“You wouldn't like what you saw,” Juyeon said dryly with a twitch in the corner of his mouth. So the other guy did look worse, you concluded, and his answer reminded you how well he knew you already. And it was the answer to all your questions. So you just nodded, not asking more, not wanting to know what he had done. You gulped and turned your head away, ready to leave. Only if your legs didn't feel so heavy.

“The others must be getting worried, we shou-”

“I bet they aren't,” Juyeon interrupted you but let you pull your hand away, to fumble with the first aid kit, putting it away. “They know you are with me.”

He was right, of course they knew. They also knew that you were safe with him. So what were you afraid of? Not rejection, for sure. You knew both of you felt this kind of tingling tension between you. Then what? You weren't sure but you didn't want to be a coward anymore.

“Walk me home?” you asked, quiet and casual, no pressure but Juyeon just hummed as if it was natural. It was kind of déjavu except not really because when you reached your apartment complex, you didn't bid goodbye reminding him to change the bandage in the morning.

“Want to come upstairs? I have beer to make up for the loss of alcohol from tonight's missed party,” you offered instead and the suggestion was heavy in the air. Juyeon knew just as well that Minjung was out with the others and wouldn't make it back soon.

“Sure,” he muttered and followed you to the elevator. The tension was almost tangible by the time the flat's door closed shut behind you.

“So, this is us. Make yourself at home, I’ll bring the be-” you chattered after kicking off your high heels but on your way to the kitchen you were stopped by calloused fingers on your wrist. His touch was sudden but not rough at all and you felt electricity run through your veins because of this simple action.

“Where is this going? What do you really want, princess?” Juyeon asked, quietly, but each of his words echoed loudly in your head. And there it was, that nickname again, except this time it wasn't playful.

You turned back to him, locking eyes, finding that dark pair on you immediately. You could have told him many things, that you just wished to talk, that maybe you could watch a movie, but then in that very moment there was just one thing you really wanted.

“You,” you blurted out, not caring about the consequences, heart beating so loud you were afraid he would hear. But maybe he knew anyway with the way he kept holding on your arm, long fingers padding over your vein. At your answer, there was a flash of… something - maybe the crumble of his resolution or a spark of desire - in his eyes before he yanked you closer to him and crashed his mouth to yours.

His lips were a bit chapped and they moved feverishly against yours. He wasn't too gentle, didn't treat you like you were made of porcelain but you didn't even need or want that. It was just perfect. You ran your tongue along the wound on his lower lip and felt a rush of power and adrenaline at the way he grunted. Maybe you started to understand why he liked those things so much.

And you fell into that hole you swore you wouldn't: that night you mapped out his body, a history of past scars, lips following the marks while Juyeon left his own trace on you murmuring sweet names into your skin and kissed you like he could never get enough of you.

But of course, he could and you made it even easier as you pretended to be asleep when he walked out.

Next morning, your best friend came out of her room while you were in the middle of oversweetening your coffee to the point you would get sick of it. She seemed awfully cheerful but you just couldn't pretend that you felt the same after those haunting thoughts that didn't let you sleep almost all night. You could still smell the antiseptic mixed with sandalwood scent on your sheets.

“So you and Juyeon didn't join us yesterday,” Minjung singsonged but her knowing smile fell as soon as she saw your expression. “Oh sweetie, what happened?”

“Nothing new. I was just stupid,” you sighed but it didn't take long for the lavina inside you to burst out. “It's not like either of us promised anything. And the sex was so good, it's just… he left without saying anything or leaving a note. Gosh, I should have known better.”

You had been emotionally involved from the very beginning and you weren't sure you could look him in the eye at the next friends gathering, so you were thinking of bailing out but in the end, with the encouragement of Minjung, you decided you weren't just some chick who would cry because of boys. So you went out accepting the drinks Chanhee generously brought all of you. You tried to avoid eye contact with Juyeon though, dancing with strangers but when you did catch his eyes on you, it made your insides boil.

“It's not polite to stare,” you told him when you got back to your table and he raised a brow at that, the smallest of smiles hiding in the corner of his mouth.

“What did you expect from a Neanderthal?”

At his joke, a chuckle threatened to leave your throat, lungs suddenly feeling light. You could do this, you thought, relaxed. So you talked: you asked about his wound, his next match, told him about your upcoming photoshoot and that one class in college that stressed you out. It was nice, so nice you felt your head spinning in his closeness and by the end of the night you found yourself pinned to the wall of a hidden corridor, lips bitten red by his eager kisses.

The thing was that it didn't happen only once. It seemed like you two were addicted to each other, hooked on the other's taste. You knew you should have stopped before getting hurt, before getting your heart broken, yet you couldn't because having him one way was still better than not having him at all.

Minjung got worried over time, asking whether you knew what you were doing and you were pretty sure Sunwoo knew about the situation, too. Otherwise his 'keeping you company while Minjung gets dressed' topic would have been utterly out of blue at the kitchen counter in your apartment.

“Juyeon… he isn't as confident as he seems. And he is pretty bad at talking about feelings stuff,” he blurted out while you were trying not to cry while cutting onions. The knife stopped in your hand, the prickling behind your eyes didn't.

“Uhm, sure.”

“Just in case you were wondering,” he shrugged and luckily dropped the topic soon, so you could go back to cooking. However, Sunwoo's wordless advice stuck with you, nudging you, knowing that you had to be the one who brings emotions. You thought that with time you would be more ready to do that but it was far from true.

It was the first time you went to the Dungeon alone. Minjung came down with something, so she was pretty much bedridden and no matter how much you insisted on staying home with her, making soup or something, she convinced you to cheer the boys on at their matches. So you were there, in the audience, alone, feeling a bit awkward and the same adrenaline mixed with awe and fear while you were watching Juyeon fight a guy taller and broader than him. He might have been the champion and you knew he was good but still, you got worried from time to time. Your heart still beat overtime when his hand was raised above his head.

You clapped proudly but this time you weren't planning on joining the afterparty, you only wanted to say hi to the guys and then leave to get some extra medicine for your best friend. However, before you could have left the warehouse, someone whom you would have never thought to see there came to your vision halfway to the exit.

“Wow, fancy seeing you here! I didn't know you like this kind of stuff,” the lanky figured guy grinned down at you and you gulped, trying to be polite about it. He was a photographer you once worked with and he was creepy as hell back then too, touching inappropriately and texting you until you blocked him not getting the sign to just stop.

“I came with friends,” you told him a half-lie and tried to pass him by with an apologizing smile but before you could have moved away from him, he grabbed your wrist, mouth pulled into a supposedly-charming smirk.

“What about getting a drink?”

“Let me go,” you attempted to pull your hand away but his grip only got firmer. Rough enough to make you wince.

“Come on, don't be like this. Or do you think you are too good for me just because you are pretty?” he spat and that was when you tossed him in the chest with your free hand even though you believed violence was never the answer. Using his loosened grip to your advantage and yanking your arm away, rubbing the bruise, you turned on your heels and started walking out in faster speed, taking out your phone just in case you had to call someone. But you weren't quick enough because the photographer guy caught up to you, calling you out on running away, calling you names you hated.

“Take your filthy hands off her,” a familiar voice snapped and you felt the photographer yanked away from you while yelling at the intruder:

“Who the fuck you think you are?”

“Someone to beat you to pulp if you keep treating her like a freaking doll,” Juyeon hissed at him, pushing him roughly to the wall of the corridor. Recognizing him the guy suddenly seemed to understand what no meant but the fear in his eyes didn't satisfy the boxer. It felt like déjavu: him coming to your rescue, his threat, the wickedness in his feline eyes, your urge to stop him before things would have gotten out of hand. “I will break your fingers if you touch her again.”

“Juyeon, stop. He isn't worth it,” you tried to pull him away by the arm but he shrugged your hand off, flashing you a glance that could have been only described as dangerous. You stumbled backwards momentarily frightened and seeing that, Juyeon's eyes immediately softened, hand loosening around the photographer's collar. He looked apologetic as he held his hand out for you with his palm up and for a moment, air got stuck in your lungs. You took his hand without thinking and let him lead you out of the place.

You asked no questions, made no protests, just enjoyed his warm palm against yours. It was new, it was butterflies in your stomach-worthy.

“My place is closer,” he said seemingly out of nowhere as if it was that simple but it wasn’t anything but that. It had been months since you knew him, since you started this something but you had never been at his place before.

“Okay,” you mumbled anyway.

He was right, he lived much closer than you, within walking distance and even though his place was smaller and quite messier than yours, you liked how cozy it was. He told you that his roommates would be back only later and brought you water to drink but you only tapped your fingers over the glass.

To be honest, you didn't know where the two of you stood, and how to approach the new situation. You never talked about it and it was light and casual, playful while slowly getting to know each other out in the open but on the other hand, behind closed doors it was way more intimate than being simple friends. And things were even more fragile now having the same friends because what if you brought up dating and then he felt uncomfortable around you? Losing him and making it harder for your best friend was both something you feared.

"You're thinking too hard," Juyeon commented and you gulped.

You weren't surprised he noticed. You weren't exactly subtle but then again how he couldn't notice you slowly falling for him then? The way your eyes lingered? The way your touches were loving and gentle? The way you just couldn't get enough.

“Juyeon… What are we exactly?” you blurted out the question from the top of your mind and he sighed as if he knew what was coming but now that this question was out, you had nothing more to lose, no more of your pride.

“Good girls like you falling for bad boys like me only happen in cheesy books and movies. We both know it wouldn't work out," Juyeon told you, resigned and so sure of himself that it made your throat close up. He didn't even try to play the oblivious, he was so straightforward that it almost heart, ripping your heart out of your chest. But it wasn't an answer, it was a 'what you were not'.

“What the hell are you talking about? You are not a bad guy,” you objected right away because despite his borderline illegal job he was a good guy, loyal to his friends. But it seemed like his definition of bad was different.

“Then why did you flinch before? Do you think I could ever hit you, hurt you physically?” he asked and he was the one who looked hurt. You frantically shook your head trying to tell him that you were taken aback by the sheer anger that enveloped him in that moment but you weren't afraid of him. But Juyeon seemed unable to listen. “You know what? Doesn't matter because I don't fit into your perfect life anyway. Why would a pretty princess want an uneducated Neanderthal like me?”

You hissed, not liking the way he used your nicknames in such context and it made you desperate.

“Because I like you!”

Your voice echoed from the empty voice, it rang into your ears and there were the two of you, standing face to face, silent for a long minute.

"I don't think you like me. You like what I stand for: excitement, adrenalin, a bit of rule breaking. You will end up with a nice guy, princess, like you should," Juyeon sighed and him telling you what you should have done made you so mad.

"Don't try to tell me what I feel!" You raised your voice, something you rarely even did and the fighter looked shocked through, eyes wide, running a hand through his inky strands.

“I don't want to hurt you and hurting people is the only thing I'm good at,” he told you and if the conversation wasn't so hurtful, you would have laughed at such a ridiculous claim.

“Bullshit. You care about your friends, you pay attention, you work hard, you are passionate and now, now you are telling me to find a nicer guy. Instead of breaking my heart to pieces by saying you don't think of me that way, that it was just sex for you, you say none of those things. Why?” you raised a brow at him, provocative, hanging on those last threads of hope and the boy stared back at you as if he was in the ring, ready to fight but unready at the same time. He was obviously torn and frustrated, knuckles turning white.

“Because it wouldn't be true,” he said almost as if he was giving up, letting the last of his walls fall and you needed a moment, heart hammering against your ribcage so loudly, to process this and what it meant. And when you finally understood, a chuckle rolled off your tongue in disbelief. You couldn’t believe that you were not just a coward but blind to see that what you two had wasn’t just being friends with something extra to him either.

You had never seen Juyeon so confused than in that moment, when in that heated moment of the fight you started laughing out loud, smile beaming and directed at him from the relief you felt.

“Good,” you hummed, acknowledging his answer. “Then stop acting so selfless. It doesn’t look good on you and anyway, Neanderthals used to fight for women, not let them go,” you tsked playfully and the guy couldn’t help a snort-like laughter either.

“You’re unbelievable,” he huffed out quite impressed and you couldn’t stop smiling. Not even when he added: “Please tell me you don’t wanna do cheesy shit Sunwoo and your friend do.”

“You mean the couple accessories and celebrating their 100th days together?” you raised a brow and just by the fact that it was his biggest worry now, you knew that you won. You pursued your lips, jokingly pondering on the possibilities. “Gosh, no… But I wouldn’t say no to cuddles tonight.”

“Oh so you wouldn’t say no...” Juyeon cracked a smile, dark cat-like eyes sparkling mischievously while a brow shot up to the middle of his forehead and hummed, excitement building up in your veins as he cornered you to the furniture behind you. “What else you wouldn’t say no to, princess?” he tilted his head and instead of giving him an answer verbally, you grabbed the collar of his tee and pulled him down for a searing kiss.

And cheesy or not, at his next match, you showed up with a banner, too. Get them, Neanderthal!

#the boyz #the boyz scenarios #the boyz imagines #juyeon scenarios #juyeon imagines #stories

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