#and then introduces said dog to you because you’re important to him <33

[chaosinterlude]

“lucifer is sadistic and mean!! he’s so serious and scary!!”

meanwhile,

he’s just a silly man who wishes for a domestic life with his partner and dog <3

#i love silly and soft lucifer #he’s not this serious guy everyone makes him out to be i mean he conducted a necromantic ritual #TO GET HIS DOG BACK #and then introduces said dog to you because you’re important to him <33 #which mirrors the way in which lucifer becomes more open to mc after they become close to his brothers!! #he just wants his favorite people to get along #this devilgram is one of the most precious things i’ve ever seen #family is so important to him!! and it really shone through in this devilgram <33 #and i love incorperating that into my writing as well <3 #gahhh stories that portray lucifer like this (in-game or fan-made) make me so so happy #gently holds him in my hands and shuts up before i ramble on for too long #obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me swd #lucifer obey me

[iwillsithereandtrytocontribute]

1- The Scientist

Masterlist Last Next Ao3

Pairings: Logince (not yet established at this point

Warnings: slight gore, let me know if I need to add anything

A Welcome to Nightvale and Sanders Sides crossover fic suggested by Local Carlos Stanon! 

Characters: Roman - Cecil Palmer 

Remus - Kevin 

Logan - Carlos the Scientist 

Janus - Steve Carlsburg 

Patton - Lauren Mallard 

Virgil - Intern Maureen 

Thomas - Dana Cardinal 

Remy - Tamika Flynn

Emile- There is no Emile because everyone in Nightvale and Desert Bluffs need therapy and there’s no one to give it to them.

A friendly desert community where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep.

Welcome to Nightvale.

“Hello listeners,” Roman said smoothly. “I have a quick notice from the City Council before we get to the important news.” He leaned forward, closer to the mic that hung from the low ceiling in the radio station. “The City Council would like to announce that you should not know about the Dog Park. You should not think about the Dog Park. Again, dogs are not allowed in the Dog Park. People are not allowed in the Dog Park. There is a possibility of seeing Hooded Figures through the electrified fence that surrounds the Dog Park. Do not approach the Hooded Figures. Do not approach the Dog Park.” Roman’s voice doubled in volume as he spoke, filling the station and the homes and cars of his listeners. He sat back in his chair as he completed his report. “The Dog Park will not harm you.

Listeners, a new man has come into town. Who is he? What do he and his beautiful, perfect hair want? He says he is a scientist, gesturing to his coat. Well…” Roman smirked knowingly. “We have all been scientists at some point haven’t we? But why now and why here, in our little town?” Roman cocked his head to the side, placing his elbows on the desk in front of him. “Of course, we will soon discover what he plans to do with the lab he is renting near Big Rico’s Pizza.

And now, traffic. 

There is a cactus in the desert. There are many cacti in the desert, but only one that matters. You will wander the desert. Searching. Searching. Searching. The sun will beat down on you, slowly melting your skin, your organs, your bones. The freezing nights, solidifying your remains until you are a shambling mess of what you once were. And still you wander. Searching for something that isn’t there and perhaps never was. You don’t remember why you’re in this desert, what you’re searching for or how you got here. How did you get here? 

An update on the new visitor to our town. The...” Roman paused, savoring the word, “... scientist’s name has been revealed to us through the use of the Secret Police’s monitoring systems.” Roman shuffled some papers on his desk, looking through them until he found the right one. “A quick reminder to speak as loudly as possible when having private conversations. You don’t want the Secret Police to miss anything important after all. And do your best to have interesting conversations. Maybe discuss owning a writing utensil, or acknowledge the existence of angels. Brighten your agent’s day. 

Returning to the scientist. His name is Logan Sanders, and he is perfect in every way.” Roman sighed wistfully. “His lab coat is crisp and clean. His perfect hair is complemented by his blindingly perfect smile. Logan called a press conference today, which of course, I attended. He told us that our little town is the most scientifically interesting community in the U.S. by far. The perfect, beautiful Logan told us that he and his team of scientists were already busy studying a house in the Desert Creek housing development that doesn’t exist. It seems like it exists, like it's just right there when you look at it, and it's between two other identical houses, so it would make more sense for it to be there than not. But it does not exist, according to Logan and his team of scientists.” Roman shrugged. He was well aware that his audience couldn’t see him, but he shrugged anyway. There was something nice about the motion of shrugging, so he shrugged. “Existence is a tricky thing.

“He said more, but I was busy watching him. He smiled and grew animated talking about something scientific. Everything about him was perfect, and I fell in love instantly.

A quick reminder to parents out there; keep an eye on the color of the helicopters while your kids play in the Sand Wastes. Are they blue? That’s the Secret Police, your kids are safe to play. Are they black? Probably the world government. Return to your homes and cower in fear. Are they red with orange stripes? Return to your home and cower in fear.  Do they have images of hawks and falcons all over them? Well, no one knows what those helicopters mean best to-

just a moment listeners, I’m receiving a call from—” Roman gasped excitedly— “Logan!” He flapped his hands energetically. “While I take this, let us go now, to the weather.”

***

“Welcome back listeners. Now I don’t want to take up time from our final story or our sponsors, (we have to pay the bills somehow), but I just have to tell you about the call from Logan,” Roman gushed. “I gave him my number at the press conference and told him to ‘Call anytime. Like literally, anytime.’ He looked at me strangely, but he took the slip of paper and he called me! Just now!

He said that I need to tell you that the sun didn’t set at the right time today.” Roman laughed. “I told him that the sun doesn’t have a schedule. But he persisted, telling me that it was important that I inform my listeners that the sun did not set at the correct time. So here I am. Informing you. I asked if he had anything else to say to me and he muttered something about needing to write some numbers on his new whiteboard and hung up.” Roman shrugged again. “You win some you lose some am I right?

And now a word from our sponsor. 

You are a human. Probably. This message is for humans. If you are human you are made of up to 65% water. Therefore, water is required to make you human. Without water, you are not human and should not be listening to this. Stop listening. Stop it. Now. Brought to you by Clorox. Humans are not the only sentient beings composed of water.

The NRA is selling bumper stickers as a part of their annual fundraiser. They sent one to the station for some publicity, and as we are a community radio I’m happy to read one for you now. The bumper stickers read, ‘Guns don’t kill people. People kill people. Guns have nothing to do with it. Stop blaming guns for your actions. They don’t like it. There, there guns, the mean people can’t hurt you anymore.’” Roman sat a little straighter, and leaned towards the microphone. 

“Someone took my advice to discuss the hierarchy of angels and they are now being taken to a reconditioning facility somewhere deep beneath the desert. Thank you for making your agent’s day,” Roman said smoothly with a smile. “As always, you are reminded that you should not know about the hierarchy of angels as they do not exist.” He nodded at the camera in the corner of the room and at the car that never moved from outside the station. 

“Stay tuned next for silence followed by wallowing in your own thoughts.” Now came his favorite part. 

Until next time. Goodnight, listeners. Goodnight.” 

*

Not far away, a scientist stared at the radio. He hadn’t turned it on when he arrived this morning. In fact, he hadn’t even known there was a radio in this lab. This morning someone introducing himself as Roman had suddenly blared out of the radio, scaring Logan half to death. Somehow, this stranger knew that he had come to town and… Logan felt his cheeks get hot as he remembered what Roman had said throughout the day. 

Logan had done some rudimentary tests around town to see if there was anything of interest. He found a surprising amount. The screams at the post office, the ghost cars, the house that doesn’t exist, and the pit behind the Ralph’s which wasn’t so much scientifically interesting as just weird. He also met a very kind Faceless Old Woman who was secretly living in his new apartment. He called a press conference (you could just do that here by thinking about having one) and explained what he found out about the house in the Desert Creek housing development. No one had seemed… concerned. Which was, in itself, concerning.

After the press conference, Roman had slipped him his number, explaining, (with a wink that made Logan glad his skin was too dark to show a blush), that it was his personal number, and that he was welcome to call whenever he wanted. Logan left the conference feeling dazed and wandered back to his lab.

He started unpacking. He needed something easy to do while his mind churned away at the strange town he had found himself in. And of course, there were chemicals to place in their exact spots, whiteboards to set up, computers to plug in... all the usual work that went into getting a lab ready for work. He hadn’t paid much attention to the radio, but he stopped his work when he heard his name. How did Roman know his name? He tried to remember everything Roman had said. Something about the Secret Police. Secret Police? Monitoring him? That’s how they learned his name?

He glanced down at his watch. He almost went back to work before he realized that it was nine o’clock. Logan glanced out the window to see that the sun wasn’t even close to setting. He pulled out his phone and looked up the time of today’s sun set. 8:33. 

Logan furrowed his brow. He pulled out the piece of paper he had carelessly shoved into his coat pocket. Beneath the hastily scratched numbers was a barely legible name "Roman Palmer." He punched the numbers into his phone and held it up to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Is this Roman?" Logan asked.

Hey all! This crossover is happening due to the amazing Local Carlos Stanon! They proposed the idea and I had to write it. This will consist of a series of oneshots, hopefully deviating from the original material a bit more than this one. Please. Please. Please listen to Welcome to Nightvale and talk about it with me! It’s an amazing podcast with very queer characters (in both senses of the word).

If you need a warning added, would like to be added to my tag list, or have any questions or requests shot me an ask or message!

Taglist: @katelynn-a-fan @dwbh888 @royal-stormcloud @thefivecalls @dragonleesupporter @emo--nightmaree @7-slights-at-virgil @lokiamorstuffs @underthesea73 @smileyzs @robinwritesshitposts @thatgaydemigodnerd @callboxkat @k1ngtok1 @somehow-i-got-an-account @silverobsidion-speaks  @a-fandom-trashdump  @averykedavra @k1ngtok1 @potatsanderssides @sign-from-god-complex

(Some of these are from @the-taglist-repository. Just ask if you’d like to be removed.)

#sanders sides #welcome to nightvale #wtnv #wtnv fanfic #wtnv fanfiction #sanders sides fanfiction #sanderssidesfanfic #ts fic #ts roman #ts logan #sanders sides crossover #welcome to nightvale crossover #mild gore

[homosociallyyours]

@velvet-impala tagged me to answer this long set of questions, and bc I love this sort of thing I’m DOING IT! I’ll tag folks here just in case you don’t want to read thru this whole dang thing. But I wanna say: if you want to do this, PLEASE DO IT and tag me so I can see-- I *love* reading responses to stuff like this. But @la-paritalienne @disgruntledkittenface @and-id-marry-larry @calmrry @crinkle-eyed-boo @lightwoodsmagic -- y’all are tagged :) 

1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or blue pen? black, but what matters most is how smoothly it writes.

2. Would you prefer to live in the country or city? walkable neighborhood in a city. 3. If you could learn a new skill what would it be? would love to learn how to hack into billionaire bank accounts without getting caught so i could redistribute their wealth to a variety of mutual aid funds. :)  4. Do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? no, just milk! unless it’s really shitty/bitter coffee, and then i will take it with a couple sugars or sweetened creamer. 

5. What was your favourite book as a child? probably the Anne of Green Gables books  6. Do you prefer baths or showers? showers! i wanna love a bath, but i get bored too fast and i never feel comfortable (where do i put my head? my feet? what do i do when my belly isn’t covered by the water and it gets cold?) so they’re meh. 

7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would it be? dryad! i wanna be a tree spirit!

8. Paper or electronic books? paper, i guess. but i do love reading fic electronically, so..

9. What is your favourite item of clothing? used to be my work hoodie. but now i would say this blue striped button down i have OR this one black dress i have with 3/4 sleeves that’s really soft and comfy. 

10. Do you like your name or would you like to change it? i always meant to start going by Dottie when I got older, but it hasn’t happened yet so it probably won’t by now? but i would never change my name generally speaking. 

more after the cut! 

  11. Who is a mentor to you? i had a co-worker who was really a mentor for me since i got into being a cheesemonger in 2008. he’s been in the industry for a long time and basically recruited me to the job i have/had here. but when i got sick he basically dropped me/hasn’t spoken to me in a long time. let me tell you: it fucking sucks. bc a mentor is a cross between a friend and a colleague and a relative; we jokingly called him my lesbian uncle. and so losing him from my life so completely over something like this is deeply shitty. 

12. Would you like to be famous and if so, what for?  not now, but before i was sick i would’ve said yes. BUT only bc i think i would be a great Saturday Night Live host (not a cast member! just a one time host with a monologue/skits). So whatever level of fame i needed to get that..

13. Are you a restless sleeper? I have really bad insomnia that means i take at least an hour to fall asleep most nights. Once I’m out, I usually sleep ok, but i do have intense dreams/nightmares that wake me up sometimes. 

14. Do you consider yourself a romantic person? yeah :/

15. Which element best represents you? earth: the wet dirt and leaves in a forest after rain in particular

16. Who do you want to be closer to? emotionally i’m pretty good i think. physically i wish i could be closer to friends and family in NYC, Seattle area, TN/Atlanta, and Germany

17. Do you miss someone at the moment? the people referenced above. also missing my Grandmomma a lot lately and my mom. 

18. Tell us about an early childhood memory. art lessons with my grandmomma. her set of pastels that were all worn down and the heavy paper (black) that she pulled out to work on. she drew a quick portrait of a man, showing me how to create depth in skin tones with blue and green against the softer flesh tones. she didn’t blend it out, the marks all painterly and strong-- her style. i was 10, maybe? 12? so not *early* but it feels like forever ago. 

19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten? i have no idea? i’ve eaten a lot of weirdish cheeses. i’ve had geoduck? 

20. What are you most thankful for? the amazing friends i’ve gathered into my life along the way, my dad, and my baby dog. 

21. Do you like spicy food? yes, within reason (i don’t get stuff that’s spicy just for the heck of it, like ghost pepper chips or whatever? but when spice is integrated in with other flavors i love it)

22. Have you ever met someone famous? i used to make up stories about meeting famous people that were based on partial truths. i’ve hung out with or met a lot of gay famous people. but the biggest person who comes to mind is Sandra Bernhard. I sold her cheese.  23. Do you do you keep a diary or journal? i have over the years. now i sometimes write things down in a paper journal, but mostly go to a really old blogging site where i basically put all my big feelings down in a public but sorta private spot.  

24. Do you prefer to use a pen or a pencil? depends on my mood.

25. What is your star sign? taurus sun and moon, gemini rising

26. Do you like your cereal soggy or crunchy? in between...not HARD crunchy, but not soft soggy. 

27. What would you want your legacy to be? would like people to remember that i loved them well and made them feel good/happy when i was around them. and hopefully that it made them feel like being good to others too. 

28. Do you like reading, what was the last book you read? i do, but i’m mostly reading fic these days. i think the thing i read last was Pink Like the Paradise Found, which was FANTASTIC!

29. How do you show someone you love them? i tell them, shower them with physical affection, and do little things for them. also try to remember small details about what they enjoy and then do stuff to make them feel good when they’re down

30. Do you like ice in your drinks? yes, but not too much

31. What are you afraid of? sometimes being along but only when it’s very dark out and i’m in the sads. honestly-- this is some deep internalized ableism but here it is --i’m very afraid of never getting better and not being able to take care of myself or anyone else. 

32. What is your favourite scent? jasmine flowers, pu-er tea, the specific scents of people i love

33. Do you address older people by their name or surname? however they’re introduced i guess. maybe because i’m an older person lol

34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? i would live in the apartment i had alone (with a guest room). i would hire someone from my community to come help me out sometimes. i would get a weekly grocery delivery from the good quality place. i would have a dog walker. and i would fly home to see my family more than once a year and fly my family out for a visit sometimes. so like. probably the way a lot of ppl live? idk. 

35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? ocean

36. What would you do if you found £50 on the ground? get dinner at the thai restaurant down the street a couple times. 

37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? yes, lots! 

38. What is the one thing you would want to teach your children? i’m not having kids BUT for the kids in my life, i try to teach them/model the importance of consent and respect for their own bodies as well as other people’s. and i know it said one thing, but alongside that is that i respect and love them for who they are, and that’s something they get to decide. 

39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? i want a lot of tattoos, but if i could get one tomorrow it would be a cheese themed tattoo with a variety of cheese knives (parm tools, dutch style knife) and a small cheese assortment. or a portrait of my dog

40. What can you hear now? this kinda dumb netflix show that i decided to binge today even tho it’s only kinda meh and my dog snoring just a little. 

41. Where do you feel the safest? when i’m surrounded by friends. 

42. What is the one thing you want to overcome/conquer? my stupid money issues prolly

43. Of you could travel back to any era, what would it be? wanna go back to 1977 and live in the girl direction AU i wrote last year, lol.

44. What is your most used emoji? laugh crying emoji or sobbing maybe

45. Describe yourself using one word. colorful

46. What do you regret the most? not sure if this is a thing but i regret not realizing when i got bitten by a tick/got lyme disease the first time, bc maybe i could’ve just taken antibiotics and killed it, and then maybe i wouldn’t be sick? 

47. Last movie you saw? watched the new charlie’s angels the other night

48. Last tv show you watched? this dumb show is called sweet magnolias, and it’s. honestly not terrible! it’s just not my style of show. OH WAIT i take it back, they left it on a really shitty cliffhanger without warning, and that is the one way to make me drop your show/fic HARD unless i like. genuinely love you. so byeeee dumb show, hope you get cancelled

49. Invent a word and it’s meaning. saungry: sadness brought on by being hungry, like hangry except oops you’re crying now! example: “fuck i knew i should’ve eaten before calling my best friend, now i miss them and i’m too saungry to figure out what to eat! Guess I’ll have tears for dinner” (almost called it sungry, but the internet thinks that might just mean ‘so hungry’)

did you make it to the end? WOW! devotion. thank you. 

#about me #long post #text post #livejournal throwback

[multsicorn]

this may or may not be a pimping post

Before I got into The Untamed, what I knew was: yeah, it’s gay.  It’s a tv show from China, so there’s censorship, but the two main guys really are in love.  They get married, they have a child together.  All of which is true!  And none of which is enough to make me watch something, guys.  So what’s the story?  Well:

In fantasy ancient China, against a background of intrigue and strife between powerful clans of magic-users (aka ‘cultivators’)… two young men meet at school, flirt, and become friends.  As the aforementioned strife explodes into all-out war, the free-spirited Wei Wuxian starts using dark (aka ‘demonic’) magic, and eventually finds himself in opposition to the rest of the clans.  Caught between the rogue necromancer he loves and the rules of the world he believes in, what will the virtuous Lan Wangji do?

(and after a time-skip, sixteen years later, after Wei Wuxian has died and come back to life - that’s not a spoiler, it’s the start of the show - when the demonic magic that Wei Wuxian developed and the power struggle among the clans that killed him are still around, and again making trouble, how will Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian overcome these dangers, and finally get their shit together?)

THAT’S the story.  Doesn’t that sound more interesting?

And I love so many many things about it, I just had to try to make a list.

~~~~~~

First off, The Untamed is DELICIOUSLY TROPETASTIC.  IDDY AS FUCK.  etc.  Let me count some of the AO3 tags:

There is so much hurt/comfort.  Wei Wuxian, especially, gets hurt, threatened, tied or locked up, etc., so many times throughout this show, and we get to dwell on his suffering so much.  Lan Wangji’s frequently there to protect him and/or help him recover!  And it goes the other way round, too: Lan Wangji gets hurt or threatened, and Wei Wuxian heals or protects him.

There is… not quite huddling for warmth?  But Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji get trapped together in a cave, not just once, but twice!  The second scene goes so far as to include some undressing on the premise of ‘let me get out of these wet clothes,’ and sleeping sitting up next to each other.

For that matter, there’s multiple instances of undressing for ‘important plot reasons.’  Multiple instances of carrying or attempting to carry each other, for ‘important plot reasons.’  And Wei Wuxian putting Lan Wangji to bed (so tenderly!) for ‘important plot reasons.’

SO MANY people get tied up SO MUCH I’m just saying.  I kept noticing it ^__^.

There’s a pair of older (not-explicitly-canon) male cultivators who are wandering the world together, basically doing exactly what Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji want to do, showing them that it’s possible.

Speaking of ‘after the time-skip’ - like I said, Wei Wuxian dies and is resurrected.  Lan Wangji not only mourns him for sixteen years, but also takes in and raises a young boy who Wei Wuxian had introduced as his own son.  (That’s the ‘have a child together’ part, and also canon kidfic, and I don’t even go there but it’s so adorable.)

Again, speaking of ‘they’re just this canon’ - they go through several key of traditional Chinese courtship and wedding rituals together, WITHOUT EVER TALKING ABOUT IT, cause it’s just, apparently, something they silently agree to do.  (And Wei Wuxian touches Lan Wangji’s ‘only for parent, children, and spouses’ ~sacred forehead ribbon~ several times, starting in episode six.)

~~~~~~

Some more of my FAVORITE THINGS EVER that aren’t quite so smush-em-together:

Lan Wangji HUMS A SONG for Wei Wuxian when they’re trapped in mortal peril in a cave - BY WHICH HE THEN RECOGNIZES Wei Wuxian when Wei Wuxian plays it almost twenty years later.

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are so drift compatible.  Whether they’re investigating or fighting or playing duets or doing magic, they trust each other implicitly, and grow to understand each other so well that they can eventually communicate with simply a look.

There are multiple times when Lan Wangji holds Wei Wuxian back from ~going too far,~ when Wei Wuxian’s being influenced by the demonic magic.  Lan Wangji knows Wei Wuxian just that well; Lan Wangji’s grip on Wei Wuxian’s wrist is enough to stop him.  And sometimes it isn’t!  Multiple times, also, Lan Wangji attacks Wei Wuxian with his sword, not even in spite of but because of the fact that he cares (so very much!) about him.  And there’s multiple times when Wei Wuxian (almost, or actually) invites Lan Wangji to kill him - only, specifically, Lan Wangji - if that’s what needs doing.

(That whole paragraph above is literally MY FAVORITE THING EVER, I could go a far way towards obsession just from that alone.  Being honest about myself here.)

And then there’s Wei Wuxian as a character: his endless questioning of rules and accepted ways of doing things.  The restlessness, both physical and intellectual, that makes him so much fun to watch, all the time, cause he’ll never sit still, or stop running his mouth.  The way he’s constantly delighted by every little thing, food and wine and his own cleverness.  Whenever everything else has paused for a bit, he is still A DELIGHT.

And THEN, there’s Wei Wuxian building a whole new home (and ~found family~, but, like, literally, they’re compared directly to his family-of-origin which he’s been forced by plot reasons to leave behind) for himself from the ground up in the Burial Mounds.  At the height of the conflict!  He’s figuring out how to grow lotus roots, and trying to make enough money for other food by selling (the subtitles say turnips, but it looks like daikon), hiding away and building houses and inventing on a cursed mountainside.

~~~~~

And it’s not all about the main characters!  The most important of the general themes above: suffering, comfort and protection, restraining or fighting with people you love - recur among many secondary characters.  I couldn’t list how many relationships of loyalty and obligation, conflicted or not, there are in this show - along with some very devasating betryals!

There’s a complicated sibling relationship (between the main character and his foster brother) which honestly rivals the central romantic pairing for me… which I could write a whole other post about, but that’s not this post.  There are, actually, quite a few interesting, intense, and variably fucked-up sibling relationships in this show!

There’s a couple of characters who are very good at manipulation, although who and how doesn’t become clear until the end of the show.

And then there’s the whole wonderfully fucked up tragedy which is the Yi city arc: a psycho mass murder is rescued by and lives domestically with a ~too good for this world~ Taoist monk, whom he both tricks into murdering people and also genuinely falls for.  And screws up irrevocably.

And the shallowest stuff: scenery porn!  costume porn!  swooshy hair and swooshy robes and swords and arrows and magic talismans (some of which are written in one’s own blood) and flutes and stringed instruments (guqins) and cute bunnies and a ‘wonder’ dog that the lead is scared of even though it’s adorable!

There’s so very much that I love.  These are the main things, I think.

~~~

There are some things I don’t like, too.

The pacing is just a mess.  The first two episodes make no sense as they’re placed, they introduce a bunch of characters that you’ll never see again and some more you won’t see until two-thirds through the show, and they’re in complete medias res re: the plot.  Everyone seems to say ‘just don’t worry,’ but if you don’t like watching things you don’t get (like me? is this such a rare preference?), I would say to actually start with episode three, and then in the middle of or after episode 33 (you’ll know when, it’ll be obvious), go back to episodes 1 and 2 to watch the start of the post-resurrection story.  Even skipping past the first two episodes, the plot takes a while to get going: if you like the lighthearted school shenanigans, you won’t have much of those for long, and if you prefer Conflict and Drama like me, you’ve still got to wait a little while.

(Lan Wangji starts having expressions, eventually, and Wei Wuxian becomes (somewhat) less of a brat.)

It’s cheesy fantasy show with not-great production values, the fight scenes and so on look ridiculous.  I love the costumes and the acting but… I’m not picky re: those sorts of things.  The reaction shots go on way too long (until you’re obsessed with every character and are glad for them), and subsequent shots sometimes have a way of overlapping with each other so that when the angle changes it looks like you’ve rewound a split second.

Lots of stuff about how the magic works never makes any sense.  Don’t worry, just go with it.

Lots and lots AND LOTS of people die.  I think the gore level is pretty mild/moderate, compared to the body count?  The show’s a sausage fest (about ~80% or more male, maybe closer to ~90% by screentime!) and although there are several interesting female characters, all but one minor one die by the story’s end.  (Also, although there’s no rape on-screen of women or of significant characters - there is of one minor villainous male character, and explicitly one and very arguably two backstories of rape between characters’ parents.)

~~~

If you wanna take a look at the show before diving right in, here are a few of my favorite vids:

The Archer by lolachrome, a character study of the main character (Wei Wuxian)

Daylight by helcinda, about the main relationship (Wangxian)

Sharp-Dressed Men by alpheratz, for the ooh shiny factor

Devil from Heaven by gamachanlive, focused on all the suffering and conflict and all four of my personal favorite relationships

#the untamed #cql #wangxian #this is WAY TOO LONG #and will probably tell exactly zero (0) people whether this show/fandom is #~right for them~ #but i had to write it so... lol #this is why! although i didn't know it till i'd watched it! #it is VERY FUCKING RIGHT for ME

[toomanysurveys9]

1. When was the last time someone saw you naked? I don’t remember.

2. If you could bring someone back from the dead and spend an hour with them, who would it be and what would you do/say? My grandma. I want to tell her about everything and introduce her to my babies.

3. What is the greatest loss you’ve endured? My grandma.

4. How would you describe your current mood? I’m okay. I’m just really, really tired.

5. When was the last time you did something you were embarrassed by? I don’t remember.

6. What was the last thing you lied about? Being okay.

7. Where is your favorite place to have sex? Prefer the bed. It’s so much easier.

8. What is your earliest memory? One of them is singing at my grandparents house.

9. Do you ever drink or get high alone? Nah.

10. What type of a drunk are you? It depends. I start off happy and okay and then I get depressed and stuff.

11. What song (or a few songs, whatever) means a lot to you and why? I get to be the one by JJ Heller.

12. When was the last time you revealed your feelings for someone? Were they accepted or rejected? It’s been a long time, and we’re married now.

13. What was the reason behind your last visit to the hospital? Miscarriage.

14. How do you tend to deal with a breakup? I’ve never really had to “deal” with a breakup.

15. What is the “worst” drug you’ve done? Are there any you will never try, or any you want to try? Weed. And I never want to do any again.

16. What is something you’ve done that you truly regret? Self-injury.

17. What does it mean to you to be a good person? Do you feel you are a good person? I think in some areas, I am a good person. But I could definitely be better.

18. What is your philosophy on life/how do you generally choose to live or conduct yourself? Always keep fighting.

19. Do you view animals as being just as important as people? Why or why not? My pets are family. As far as other animals, while I’m not a vegetarian or vegan, I still believe they should be treated in a humane way and with compassion. There’s no reason to be cruel, such as abusing them or keeping them in harsh conditions. <<< This.

20. When was the last time you were up all night and why? I’ve been up all night a lot. I haven’t been sleeping too well lately.

21. What is the worst thing you’ve done to yourself? What is the worst thing someone else has done to you? I have engaged in self-injury in the past. And I have been sexually abused.

22. What is the most personal thing you’re willing to reveal? Uh, I guess what I shared above.

23. What made you stop talking to the last person you cut out of your life? We just grew apart I guess.

24. Is there a situation or person you haven’t been able to get over/forgive? Yeah.

25. Who was the last person to yell at you? Did you yell back? I don’t know. Either my mom or Jake. I don’t know that I yelled back.

26. Where did your last injury come from? I banged a chair leg into my shin about a week or two ago. It still hurts.

27. What are some kinks or turn-ons you have, if any? I don’t have any kinks. My turn-ons are pretty basic.

28. What are you like during arguments? These days... I tend to shut down.

29. What is the worst thing you have said to another person? I don’t know.

30. Where do you like to be kissed? Forehead kisses are sweet.

31. What is more difficult for you, looking into someones eyes when you are telling someone how you feel, or looking into someones eyes when they are telling you how they feel? Both. Eye contact is not my strongest quality.

32. Think of the last time you were REALLY angry. WHY were you angry? Do you still feel the same way? Something Jacob said to Wyatt that wasn’t okay at all. And yes.

33. You are on a flight from Honolulu to Chicago non-stop. There is a fire in the back of the plane. You have enough time to make ONE phone call. Who do you call? What do you tell them? Jacob. That I love him and to make sure he always tells our babies that I love him too.

34. You are at the doctor’s office and he has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? What do you do with your remaining days? Would you be afraid? I would definitely tell some people. And I don’t know. But I don’t want to think about this with my upcoming doctor appointment. And very.

35. You can have one of the following two things. Which do you choose? Why? There’s no choices to choose between...

36. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late even once more, you are fired. Do you take the time to save the dogs life? Why or Why not? Yes I would. Because I can find a new job. The dog won’t have another life.

37. Would you rather be hurt by the one you trust the most or the one you love the most? They’re the same.

38. Your best friend confesses that he/she has feelings for you more than just friendship. He/she is falling in love with you. What do you (or did you) do/say? I’m straight, so there’s that...

39. Think of the last person who you know that died. You have the chance to give them 1 hour of life back, but you have to give up one year of yours. Do you do it? Why or Why not? No. People might think I’m horrible for that... but no.

40. Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend? I don’t know.

41. Does love = sex? No.

42.Your boss tells your coworker that they have to let them go because of work shortage, and they are the newest employee. You have been there much longer. Your coworker has a family to support and no other means of income. Do you go to your boss and offer to leave the company? Why or Why not? I’m in the same boat, so probably not.

43.When was the last time you told someone HONESTLY how you felt regardless of how difficult it was for you to say? Who was it? What did you have to tell the person? I don’t know.

44. What would be (or what was) harder for you to tell a member of the opposite sex, you love them or that you do not love them back? That I love them.

45. What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up? Why would it be hard to lose? Uhhh. Ice cream. It just makes me happy sometimes.

46. Excluding romantic love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them. Who were they to you? My daughter.

47. If there was one moment and one time in the last month what would you change and why? I don’t know.

48.Imagine it is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. WHO do you wish was there with you? Jacob.

49. Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying? Why or Why not? I’m certified, so yes. Compressions are the most important component if you’re uncomfortable doing mouth to mouth until help arrives.

50.You are holding onto your grandmother’s hand and the hand of a newborn that you do not know as they hang over the edge of a cliff. You have to let one go to save the other. Who do you let fall to their death? What was your rationale for making the decision? I don’t like this survey. I”m going to be up all night, anxious as shit. So thanks.

51. Are you old fashioned? I guess in some areas.

52. When was the last time you were nice to someone and did NOT expect anything in return for it? I never expect anything in return for my kindness.

53.Which would you choose, true love with a guarantee of a broken heart, or never loved at all? Why? True love. I would rather have been loved for awhile than to feel as though I don’t matter.

54.If you could do anything or wish anything, what would it be? I’d wish for all illnesses to be cured and to be able to stay this age forever.

55. What was the last thing you ate? Pizza.

56. What kind of guys are you usually attracted to? I don’t know.

57. What’s the stupidest thing that’s happened to you that ended a friendship? I don’t remember.

58. What’s the longest amount of time you’ve had sex for?

I don’t know. I don’t time it.

59. What reality shows do you watch? The Masked Singer. I Can See Your Voice.

60. Post a video of yourself here: No thanks.

61. Where do you work? A local center for kiddos on the autism spectrum.

62. Have you ever gone up to a car thinking it was yours and tried to get in it? Yeah. I’ve gotten in one once even...

63. Where do you buy most of your clothes? Walmart.

64. If you were very intelligent and had the capability to have any profession, what would you like to be? Psychologist.

65. What’s your most irrational fear? I have a lot of them.

66. How many radio stations do you listen to? There’s two I mostly listen to.

67. What kind of music do they have?

One is popular music, and the other is country.

68. Would you rather go to Greece or Hawaii? Greece.

69. Musicals: Yay or Nay? Eh. Not necessarily my favorite generally.

70. What are the next concerts you’ll be going to? I don’t know. I’m going to a musical in a couple weeks though.

71. What was the last conversation you had with your best friend about? Needing sleep.

72. Are you one of those people that LOVE to hug others? Depends on the person, but not generally.

#survey #surveys #personal #question #questions #random

[reminder-to-breathe]

6/18/18 10:32 pm

I needed to write this for myself and nobody else.

I read an article about how to get over an ex and it said you need to remember all the things their new partner gets to deal with now instead of you. So here’s a list of things that I’m never going to miss about you when I was your girlfriend.

1. The way you never wanted to give up drugs or alcohol for me.

2. The way you made me feel so special but yet still told me you had a habit of attracting the “crazies”

3. The way you made me pay for dates because you weren’t working

4. The way I wasn’t ever allowed at your house.

5. The way I was so scared of your mom disapproving of me, and when she met me - she hated me.

6. When your mom yelled at me in the parking lot and you didn’t defend me.

7. You accusing me of cheating on you when I told you I was pregnant

8. When you told me that you’d never forgive me if I had an abortion and you’d tell everyone what I had done.

9. The fact that I had to pay for raves/concerts and vacations and you never paid me back or even offered to.

10. When you told me you bought me a birthday present and it just “never came in the mail”

11. I took a college class for you so you’d make an “A” and you had the nerve to tell me that you didn’t even ask me to do that for you.

12. I had to threaten that our child would have my last name if you didn’t get a job - and you didn’t until the week she was born.

13. You didn’t tell me where you ever went... and one night you went out and totaled your truck and almost killed yourself and your friend.

14. I always had to ask what you were doing and who you were with - you NEVER volunteered information.

15. If I asked you to talk out a problem with me - you “didn’t want to argue” or “we’ll discuss this later” but there would never be a later.

16. You felt threatened by my family and didn’t even try to get close to them.

17. You insulted my mom and told her that her losing her vision was “karma” for her being rude to you.

18. You pulled out a gun and threatened to shoot yourself in front of me

19. You threw my phone against the wall and shattered it because you had suspicions I was talking to an ex-boyfriend.

20. You dropped me on the side of the road with no phone and all of my luggage.

21. You NEVER said sorry or felt guilty for all of it.

22. You were never going to come back to me and you said I was “stalking” you when I tried so hard to see you on the first day of class.

23. You told me if you hadn’t gotten me pregnant - we’d “probably” still be friends.... but not a couple.

24. The night you were drunk at a friends wedding and we listened to a baby cry (I was pregnant) and you were mad at me and you told me that you hoped I could do this on my own.

25. The way we couldn’t ever go out to eat without you getting sick from eating gluten.

26. You’d always eat gluten anyways and be sick and make us both suffer and not enjoy anything.

27. You never wanted to have sex.

28. You never made me feel beautiful - I felt like I had to force myself on you for any physical affection.

29. You’d never sext me back, you would just say I looked so sexy or that you missed my body - never go further than that.

30. You stopped going to my pregnancy check ups after my mom became involved.

31. You sued me for a paternity test the day after Christmas and didn’t even tell me you had done it.

32. You never helped me with our child past 6 months.

33. You made me come home from work early because you couldn’t take care of her the one night I asked you to babysit.

34. You never pay child support on time and you always complain when you have to do it.

35. You lied to my face and told me that you only recently started dating her but when you posted it on Facebook - you have been together since October.

36. You push me off you if I try to hug you for longer than 5 seconds because I just want to feel close to you again.

37. You stopped wanting to sleepover. When I asked you to sleepover it was always “next time.”

38. You told your whole family I was keeping our daughter from you when I wasn’t.

39. Always wanting me to meet your friends and hang around people I didn’t know

40. You always got mad at me for not introducing you to people.

41. You never wanted to open up to me and talk about anything personal

42. You always were so self conscious and didn’t let me look at you.

43. You cut your hair.......

44. You took out your snakebites and tried to look like more of an adult after our child was born but you didn’t try to actually change yourself and grow up.

45. I bought your sisters kid’s Easter presents and we ended up having a fight so they were never given.

46. We were only happy when we were high together

47. You never really liked my friends

48. You’re allergic to cats

49. You have no motivation to go to college and get an actual career.

50. After we broke up, you ignored message after message of me trying to get you to see your daughter.

51. My first Mother’s Day all you sent me was a “gif” saying happy Mother’s Day, you couldn’t even be bothered to type it out or have a conversation with me?

52. You missed our daughters first birthday party to work. Even though I begged you to take off and be there for it.

53. Anytime I tried to invite your family to things - you told me no even though you admitted later that you had just never asked them.

54. You showed your best friend my nudes.

55. As soon as we broke up, you smoked meth again.

56. Your dad was an alcoholic and you always wanted to follow his footsteps.

57. You never thought you’d live past 30 so you felt like life was pointless.

58. You hung out and prioritized friends more than you did me.

59. You don’t go to any baby appointments anymore or even pretend like you care how she’s doing.

60. You made an excuse and said the reason you couldn’t see our daughter was because of my feelings for you.

61. You made me feel like a horrible person for being in love with you.

62. You got me a pair of socks for Christmas and nothing else.

63. You brag about being “sober for a year” constantly but I know you haven’t been.

64. As soon as you get off probation - you’re going back to doing drugs.

65. Always saying you hate your job but never leaving it and bragging that you work the hardest.

66. We worked in the same building and you never came and saw me, not even once.

67. If I texted you something silly, you just called me weird.

68. I couldn’t tell you about all the things I felt.

69. I wanted you to propose some day and you never even mentioned it or thought about it.

70. You told me you’d follow me to the ends of the earth but you left as soon as things got hard.

71. You couldn’t look me in the eyes in the court room because you knew you had betrayed me.

72. We never wanted to watch the same shows or movies

73. You never wanted to take photos together.

74. You wrote me off as “crazy” rather than trying to fix anything.

75. You never pushed me or motivated me to do anything that was important to me.

76. You texted my parents and demanded to see our child when I was in Galveston because you didn’t want to talk to me (my parents didn’t birth her, I did!)

77. You always complained that 25 minutes was a long drive to come see me.

78. You didn’t like to drive at night so if I really needed you - you weren’t there.

79. You were never there.

80. You stopped telling me I was beautiful.

81. You always said “good morning sunshine” until the day you didn’t love me anymore.

82. You told me you weren’t ever going to date again - but you just meant you weren’t ever going to date me again.

83. You don’t give people second chances

84. You say you cut people out of your life but you still talk to them and still hang out with them (??? Seriously???)

85. You overdosed and blamed it on me stressing you out.

86. Everything always became a fight or an argument that we couldn’t solve

87. Your hard headedness

88. You think I sold our dog to “spite” you but it was really because I couldn’t handle him.

89. You totaled two trucks within a year apart of eachother

90. You’re on probation until August because of a DWI offense.

91. You never wanted to see a doctor to try to get better with your gluten allergy.

92. You always relayed information wrong to your family and made them upset with something I didn’t even say.

93. You dropped out of college because you didn’t feel like taking a remedial math course

94. You were homeschooled and never got to learn how to socialize with people.

95. You’re 26 1/2 and still living with your mom.

#100 reasons why #ex #ex-boyfriend #love #heartbreak #saying goodbye #ashton #this is for you #i feel better

[terrialaimo]

Anti Cat Spray For Furniture Amazing Tips

Of course, you banned kitty from the office when she is done with cats fit into a bed or clothing, or on the things in your reaction to it.Perhaps it's because you know that they're cold.It will be very careful about urine odor and can be quite cautious, even with people they've lived with for years.Sometimes, it's not a dog who will soon choose to grow healthy.

You have to buy the premium cat litter, leaving your once-spotless floor with her kitty box making the situation but always make sure it has been successfully mated, she will probably be necessary.However, this does not like the clay type, while others do not.The most common flea and eggs in your hands while playing and wants you to clean the litter is made by combining fifteen ounces of hydrogen peroxideFirst Thing to do is to let a female or male.And remember, always have food and water clean the box at those times when cat lovers and owners.

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Relieve yourself from these pests will make you pass on your carpet.Although your vet to find out the front door for a bit like young children won't be able see or even human flea, all of our four Persian male cats, the female we just let her out and treat accordingly.De-clawing a cat yourself, you can rub catnip on the length of the time and you are cleaning the mess a little dish washing detergent.Owing to the end back through the cat's skin and shaking her are just some of the amazing things about cat urine glowing in the scent of the owner's house.These signs are for example... difficulty getting up or they may go for the next dew days.

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Claws are a clear plastic sweater storage box.Likewise, they aren't asleep and when you come to me that his spraying in the district visiting.But by preventing the eggs from growing, the next step, which is a new kitten, some training will be important for removing cat urine stains:This is what causes the strong cat urine odor is unique among the common cat illness.Is your litter box in the family as they flit by without harming them.

Canned Tuna, dog food, raw liver use very sparingly.You can apply them, or you will raise a happy, well mannered and loving experience.The condition is caused to your vet for help.To prevent this, leave an inch of it's cat and this option is an effective cleaner that you can try gently pushing the palm of your problem.As such, the choice of what you're after, rather than terrorizing the cat.

An important thing for Christmas this year?It is natural, instinctual behavior that is warm soapy water.It's amazing how just a few times will discourage all but impossible to remove the vinegar smell to the household should be of this idea fixed strongly enough in our mindset.The odor of urine upon the floor next to items your cat has gone through these three fronts, it's just not going to fool your cat.They may choose to roam far away from plants, and certain vets have devised methods to discourage will quickly learn whatever behavior problem - your cat to have a re-infestation.

My Cat Keeps Peeing On My Clothes

Some cats essentially have this problem should not arise.Fresh litter can vary both between different types of litter is sharp and extremely painful to walk around barefoot - ouch!These are just some thinning of the bag of seed germinating potting soil so it will spray urine, distract it in an ever so cute fashion on her head and then add some to bird feeders and installing automatic motion sensors which make noise or squirt the entire box.I decided to use without being heavy or awkward, and small enough to deposit their waste somewhere other than the one shooting the water, so it is an animal, they are looking at training your cat privacy and keep your cat can poop in peace, without fear or some books and some less obvious problems with your decision and read up on a good job of removing the cat to your vet for advice.Be responsible and have an indoor or outdoor cats and dogs to rats to lions.

Here's what you can rub catnip all over it.Do you plan on keeping their females fertile and breed them for at least one time.As a last resort you could control all over the country, cat owners think to give your pet cat in your home is because you just got a few minutes.Emotional or physical and is nowhere to be done in a book, online or by falling off of your head and then wipe down.As such one must determine the exact spot.

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Furniture costs a lot of people who opt for the owner, to train my cat scratch my furniture?Knowing how to train your cat for a small number of reasons why cats do not discipline him.Your cat may want to consider in caring for cats.If you are all kinds of bacteria two of them for you.Buy them a description of your garden is to keep a cat scratching in most situations.

Just repeat everyday until you reach the ceiling.Don't feel like correcting this spraying problem is a self-cleaning cat litter try to tell cat is doing.There are many things you can do to discourage them from doing so.He had gone blind, and maybe even some groceries.Sure enough, we were driving, she didn't eat, drink or use instead of yours.

Isn't life so much that they are not treated in good health is not medical then it may be necessary to consult with your pet afraid of you can use noise to stop cat scratching.However, he was a nice quiet place to scratch, so its good idea - cats are also child-friendly disinfectants available in local rodent and pest control.If he were an easy to ensure that any excess cord is hanging off a hair dryer on the counter, can make available to you to keep fleas out of the cat during an asthma attack, it should become clear of fleas as well as the arrival of the house.These remedies don't remove the vinegar by rubbing some catnip is a painful operation, in which case a fly strip above the bed or inside one of many varieties of fleas, you should always start out with her tail up and place him on the floor as well as a human being, up to shelters each year and your peace of mind knowing he is Number One in your cat feels better.Cats make adorable pets, they love to wander.

Cat Spraying How To Stop

Ready access to rooms, and even enjoy them very much.Ear infections and other infections answer to cat urine.Everyone should use a powder or spray it on horizontal or flat surfaces, e.g. the ground in the cover.However, it does not function for another.Has a member of your cat goes out on that spot.

Most landlords are dead set against allowing a dog can be.Cats don't need to share a home or even stop, your cat is probably due to a new kitten you should have one and it removes all of them can become fertile as soon as possible right now, and here you are someone to care for.It's said that they can eat, sleep and stand on as well.The Latin name for catnip is Nepeta cataria, and originally was grown as a reward in the 21 to 33 percent range.Some breed such as these are either Siamese or the aggression level is high, you should make it to learn a few extra cat supplies and this is a constant cause of your friends and neighbors for a poor little cat/kitten.

#Anti Cat Spray For Furniture Amazing Tips #Male Cat Spraying

[chloe-elizabeth-price]

0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 16 17 18 20 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 37 38 40 41 42 43 and 44

Wow, almost all of them, huh, @annoyinglyuniquebread? I’ll put it under a read-more as to not hit everyone with walls of text but read if ya feel like it…Okay, here we go!

0. Height 

I’m 5′1 just like Carrie Fisher/Princess Leia!

1. Age

I’m 21, but my birthday is in February so pretty soon I’ll be feelin’ 22! *Dances horrendously*

2. Shoe Size

 I’m a 5 in US sizes I think…?

3. Do you smoke?

I do not

4. Do you drink?

Well yes, it’s important to stay hydrated kids, my drink of choice is coke or tea…But I assume this is asking if I drink alcohol which I do not do

5. Do you take drugs?

Once again I assume this is referring to illegal drugs and not meds, I do not do any of those. However I do take antidepressants and sleeping pills for my anxiety-related insomnia/the occasional anxiety-suppressor.

6. Age you get mistaken for?

As I’m pretty short and thin (+ you tend to look smaller in a wheelchair which i occasionally use) I’d say people tend to assume I’m a lot younger than I am. If asked my age most people tend to guess around 15, or at least they did when I was in my late teens, no one has guessed my age in a while so maybe i look older these days? idk lol

7. Have tattoos?

I do have a tiny lightening bolt on my wrist, it’s a Harry Potter reference/a symbol for my general love of stories.

8: Want any tattoos?

I do definitely want more tattoos in the future, I haven’t really decided on placements yet but I know that I want a Buffy-B (a B in the Btvs-font) on my other wrist so that my two fandom tattoos can match in placements. I also want a fox somewhere and “fearless” in Taylor Swift’s handwriting to remind me of her brilliant definition of the word: (”To me, fearless is not the absence of fear. It’s not being completely unafraid. To me, fearless is having fears. fearless is having doubts. Lots of them. To me, fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death.”)   which I think will help with my anxiety. Those are a few of the tattoos I know that I want to get at some point, but there’s always room for more options since I really like the idea of a lot of tattoos!

9: Got any piercings?

Nope, not even pierced ears

10: Want any piercings?

Not really, no

11: Best friend?

@gay-grandma

12: Relationship status?

Single, sapphic and sad

13: Biggest turn ons?

As far as personality and little things go I’d say people who listen and respect my opinions and my view of a situation, but also aren’t afraid to say what they think/voice their opinions I guess. Also like, when people are genuine with their affection and you can tell that they just genuinely care for you I guess? Geez this sounds cheesy! As for physically, I’m gonna say collarbones…Is that weird? I feel like that’s weird…Not necessarily seeing collar bones (malnutrition isn’t sexy, kids!) but just like biting or kissing them I don’t even know! Maybe I have a few kinks too, but this is already officially TMI and I’m gonna stop………..   

14: Biggest turn offs?

Bigoted or small-minded people honestly, nope not gonna interact!

16: I’ll love you if…

You respect me, seduce me with your nerdiness and/or let me introduce you to nerdy stuff (Movies/shows/books/games etc) I like and most importantly, genuinely seem to like me tbh, I don’t ask for much…

17: Someone you miss

I live pretty far away from my family for school so I find myself almost constantly missing them and my dog :( Also you and your stupidly pretty face, @annoyinglyuniquebread I can’t believe it’s gonna be so long until I get to see you!

18: Most traumatic experience?

Probably something emotionally abusive at the hands of my biological dad or his wife but honestly I’ve repressed most of it and I don’t really wanna talk about that sooooo………*shudders* Anywayyyy

20: What I hate most about myself?

Too many things to list to be honest. I’m not trying to sound negative, but I do have a lot of issues when it comes to how I view myself, but I am working on them and am hoping to be getting to a place where I can honestly say that I don’t think I suck in the near future, wish me luck!

22: What I want to be when I get older?

Author! I wanna write, write write! If ONE kid picks up a book I’ve written and it helps them in any way at all or sparks that love of stories in them that has become my own driving force, then my goal in life has been achieved!

23: My relationship with my sibling(s)

Okay, so I have 4 siblings, two older sisters and two younger brothers. My relationship to my sisters are pretty much your standard sibling-situation, we grew up together and occasionally we wanted to murder each other, but most of the time we got along and now as adults we’re all pretty close even though I live far away. My brothers are a more complicated situation, due to my nonexistent relationship with my biological father I haven’t actually seen my little bros in years, I hope that we’ll be able to have some type of relationship one day, but as long as they live with dad I don’t see that as possible, although I love them and would love to be a proper big sib to them someday!

24: My relationship with my parent(s)

My mom is absolutely one of the most important people in my life, I love spending time with her and she’s the one I go to first if any problem, big or small arises in my life, we’ve always been extremely close and she’s quite simply my best friend. My step-dad (who I tend to refer to as dad most of the time) has been in my life since I was 4 and he’s more of a father to me than my biological dad (who i don’t even view as my ‘dad’ at all) ever was or could ever be. I love him with all my heart, he’s the best and one of the funniest people I know! I’d say generally I’m very, very close to both of my parents and they’re both extremely important to me and here I am getting sappy at 2AM. 

25: My idea of a perfect date

Movie/Show marathon and cuddling with snacks tbh

26: My biggest pet peeves

When the cover/general appearance of a book on my shelf doesn’t match what the rest of the books in that series look like…All my books have to match if they’re part of the same series or I freak the fuck out honestly! That’s really the only pet peeve I can think of at the moment.

27: A description of the girl/boy I like

I kinda really like @annoyinglyuniquebread but don’t tell her, it’d just get to her pretty head and she’d probably tease me about it and I’m shy!

28: A description of the person I dislike the most

Wow, has someone told the oversized cheeto running America that he has a giant dead cat on his head yet orrrrr…?

29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend?

I can’t think of a specific situation in which I’ve done this just now, but chances are if you’re my friend I’ve probably lied to you and told you I was sick so I wouldn’t have to hang out with you that day, it’s not that I don’t WANNA hang out, I love you I promise…it’s just my very awkward introverted ass not being sure how to tell you that I need to reschedule because my social battery is drained and that I am going to physically explode if I have to be around humans for the next few days, without sounding like a hermit and/or hurting your feelings soooo…Yeah, sorry about that!

30: What I hate the most about work/school?

That it ruins the fun of learning with all those deadlines and gives me performance anxiety about stuff I’d normally be good at/comfortable with doing…

31: What my last text message says?

“Night, I love you

32: What words upset me the most?

Any type of uninformed, ignorant hate speech, when someone is being bigoted in my presence it always makes me feel like I want to scream and/or cry 

33: What words make me feel the best about myself?

When people compliment my hair, clothes or writing it really makes my day every time without fail! Also when people use my chosen name and pronoun it makes me feel like I could take on the whole world on my own and win, so thank you SO much to everyone in my life who make an effort to do that every day!!

34: What I find attractive in women?

Um, everything about them, i mean have you SEEN girls??? I love being a lesbian; ladies, you’re all so beautiful I wanna squeal just thinking about it!

35: What I find attractive in men?

Them being Harrison Ford. If you are male, but not Mr. Ford I’m sorry but I’m simply not attracted to you at all and won’t date you. Sorry men, I don’t make the rules. However, if you’re reading this, Harrison from ca 1980 (why would you be?) hit me up!

37: One of my insecurities?

Too many to list again, but like I said, I am working on that! 

38: My childhood career choice

Author, not much has changed, huh? I’ve actually known what I want to be since I was like 5.

40: Who I wish I could be?

A happier, more secure version of myself…Or you know Han Solo/Veronica Mars/Kim Possible, that works too!

41: Where I want to be right now?

Right at this moment I’m pretty happy here under the covers in my big comfy bed listening to Taylor Swift with my laptop in my lap and answering all these questions. Even though I’m having a pretty bad case of insomnia I feel pretty content, a little hungry tho…Think I’m gonna go make noodles and finish Stranger Things when I’m done answering these! 

42: The last thing I ate

Some salted caramel chocolate a while ago, it was delicious!

43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately?

Well I’d be cheating on my wife if I didn’t say Sarah Michelle Gellar, wouldn’t I? Although there are a few other candidates as well…

44: A random fact about anything

Did you guys know that @annoyinglyuniquebread aka Bella is really cute and awesome and great at holding hands? Well, if you didn’t there’s a random fact for ya!

Wow, that sure was a lot of questions, but it was fun to answer them all! Thanks for sending them, Bella

#thanks for the ask!

[lovemesomesurveys]

1. Can you remember what you were doing at 8:15 this morning? I had just gotten up again. I woke up an hour before, but I ended up falling asleep again.

2. In your phone’s contacts, who is the first person listed under the letter ‘R’? When did you last see that person? I only have one person, which is my brother, Richard. I last saw him on Christmas Eve-Eve.

3. If someone is sticking their nose into your business where it isn’t wanted, how would you deal with that? Would you say something to them? I likely wouldn’t say anything to be honest.

4. What did you have for lunch today? Or, if you haven’t had lunch yet, what do you think you will have? Ravioli stuffed with ricotta cheese and spinach.

5. Is there someone you desperately want to see/speak to atm, but you can’t? I want to catch up with Ty and grab some lunch or coffee or something soon, but I don’t know when that can happen. We haven’t hung out since back in October. We were hoping it would be the start of us hanging out more often again, especially once he was on winter break. Of course something came up on my end regarding my health, so that hasn’t been able to happen so far. It sucks. :/

6. Do you and your significant other have a special song? What is it? I’m single.

7. If you HAD to sing something on karaoke, what song would you choose? Ahhh you won’t catch me doing karaoke.

8. Can you remember the last time you felt ill? What was wrong with you? I feel that way all the time on some level for one reason or another. I have chronic health issues, physically and mentally.

9. What time is it now? Are you tired? It’s 6:16PM (it feels so much later), and yes of course I’m tired. Always.

10. If you wear make-up, do you take it with you, to reapply throughout the day? Does your make-up stay for a long time after you first apply it, or do you find that you need to reapply often? Are you wearing any make-up atm? I only keep lip gloss with me, but even that I hardly ever reapply. My eye makeup stays, but the eyeliner smudges a little at the corner of my eyes sometimes. All that requires is me wiping it away. I don’t ever bring any of that makeup with me to touch up. I am not wearing any makeup at the moment, no.

11. What if you found the last person you kissed, in bed with the last person you texted? Uh... that would be Joseph with my younger brother. No. Just no. My brother is seventeen first and foremost, so no. For two it would just be messed up to have my ex with my brother. Just not cool.

12. The last person you held hands with - have you ever kissed them? On the cheek.

13. Can you remember what your parents bought you for Christmas last year? Yes, as it was only last month. My memory can be spotty sometimes, but I do remember that. One of the gifts I got was a Ninja Coffee Bar, which is awesome. I bought a few different Torani syrups to make flavored lattes and such. Sometimes I’ll get fancy and add whipped cream and toppings, ha. Oh, and it came with a built in frother for the full latte effect.

14. Think about the person you fell hardest for. Why do you think your feelings for this person were so strong? How is he/she different compared to everyone else you’ve had feelings for? I never had a connection with anyone like the one Ty and I had. We just...clicked. We brought out good things in each other, and uplifted one another. We supported each other. He seemed to genuinely care about me. He seemed like he really did want to get to me, like who I really am. My likes and my interests and such. When we talked, he really listened. He’d remember little things I told him about myself. We used to text each other everyday for hours. He’d send me things he saw that reminded him of me. We hung out a couple times a week. It was always him who initiated it, so I knew he really did want to see me and it seemed like he really did enjoy being around me. We’d go out for lunch or grab coffee at Barnes and Noble and look around. He’d come over sometimes and we’d watch a movie or play board games. He’d invite me over for coffee and dinner. He included me in his life, and introduced me to people that were important to him. That meant something to me. We often talked about trips we wanted to take together someday. We wanted to plan a road trip. Things were SO good between us at one point, and I guess that should have been a clue. They were too good. I really thought it could have been my first real relationship. I definitely saw it going in that direction. Then it all changed, and now it’s gone. Time has never been on our side. I want to try and get back to where we were, but I worry that it’s too late. :/ I want it all back. 

30. Have you ever caught your friend cheating on their boyfriend/girlfriend? If you have, what did you do about it? If you haven’t, what do you think you would do? I didn’t catch her because I knew it was happening. She told me. I didn’t do anything about it except offer my advice when she asked for it. I don’t support cheating, but I couldn’t tell her what to do. Like I said, all I could do was offer advice and my opinion when she asked for it. Other than that, I did not get involved.

31. When your last relationship ended, how long was it before you felt ready to think about being with someone else? I was heartbroken over Joseph for a year thinking no one else would ever come along and have interest in me again, and then towards the end of that year Ty came into my life. I was afraid to go down that path again with someone else and before Ty, I didn’t have any interest in doing so. Then he came along, and turned it all around.

32. Has any of your friends ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend that you found attractive, and you would secretly have liked to have for yourself? No.

33. How many guys do you know named Matthew? I don’t know any, actually.

34. Think about the last person that made you cry. Would that person be there for you if you needed help? It was myself and things that I’m dealing with.

35. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to sleep last night? Do you remember what you talked about? It was my mom. We were just watching a show together and talking about that.

36. Has someone of the opposite sex made you cry at any point during the last 24 hours? No.

37. Is there anything you would like to say to your most recent ex? No.

38. If your friends are sexually active but you aren’t, does that bother you? Have you ever felt pressured to have sex before you were ready, because your friends had done it? It doesn’t bother me that they’re sexually active and I’m not, it would just bother me when they’d make comments about it. They’d say things about how I need to “get laid” and need to just do it. How they’d set me up with someone. They’d make comments about my lack of experience whenever they’d talk about theirs. Or about what I should do with so and so when I was talking to a guy. Pushing me to do things with that person. That’s what bothered me. It’s none of their business. I have my reasons for why I haven’t yet, and that’s my own personal decision. When the right person comes along and I am ready, then it will happen. I’m not rushing it or doing it just to do it.

39. In your opinion, what is the difference between having a crush and being in love? Have your own experiences helped you to realise that there is a difference? There’s a huge difference between a crush and being in love like seriously?

40. Did the last person you hugged have any of these letters in their name: T, R, K, P, J? Not in their first name.

41. What’s the most unhealthy thing you’ve eaten in the last 24 hours? Well, today I had a big cinnamon crunch muffin with my coffee this morning. After lunch sometime I had loaded cheddar potato wedges with a Dr. Pepper. Soon I’ll be having a burger and onion rings. After that, I’ll have my nighttime treat of Oreos and coffee.

42. What was the last compliment you received from someone of the opposite sex? I don’t recall.

43. Who did you last say ‘I love you’ to? What colour are that person’s eyes? My mom; brown.

44. If you took away the first and third letters of your name, what would you then be called? Tphanie.

45. Name 7 things that make you happy, and explain how it might affect you if you had to give them up. I’ll do the first part of the question. <<< Same.

1. My family.

2. My morning cup of coffee with a muffin or donuts. Having one of those with my coffee has become apart of my morning cup of coffee routine, and I look forward to it everyday.

3. My favorite foods.

4. Alexander Skarsgård.

5. Taking trips.

6. Giraffes.

7. Fall and winter related things.

46. Think about your Facebook profile photo. What kind of assumptions do you think a stranger might make about you, from seeing that photograph? Would any of these assumptions be correct? Well, right now it’s a photo of my chocolate lab, Brandie. I’ve had it as my profile since a few days after she passed away last month. Someone would likely assume that that’s my dog, which would be correct. They’d also think she was a beautiful dog because she was.

47. You buy a bar of chocolate, but you decide that you don’t want to eat it now, and put it in the fridge. When you go back later, half of it’s gone - someone else has started eating it! Who are you most likely to blame? My brother or my dad. Probably my brother.

48. Choose 5 friends, and talk briefly about each person’s longest/most serious relationship. Who was the relationship with, and how long did it last? Naaaah.

49. Do you think it’s wrong for someone to commit themselves to a long-term relationship at a young age? Explain. I wouldn’t say it’s wrong.

50. Is there something happening in the near future, that you’re looking forward to? Yes, actually. It’s nice having something to look forward to.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

[travisandersondatingblog]

3 Powerful Ways to Make Him Miss You Like Crazy

Back in elementary school, when you liked a boy, you could make him miss you by ignoring him…or shoving him in the mud.

Yea, that seems counter-intuitive to make a guy like you, but hey, it worked for the second-grade set.

Now you need more stealthy and effective ways to make him miss you like crazy when you first start dating.

Ever since that first date, he’s all you think about…and you want him to have that same laser focus on you. You know you should play it cool, but you’re just not sure how cool you need to be to get inside his brain and make him want to spend more time with you.

Your girlfriends tell you to ignore his calls. To make him jealous by posting photos of you and other guys on Facebook.

But those aren’t the way to get him to miss you. Those are methods as juvenile as what you did in second grade.

We can do better.

In this video, I will teach you three surefire strategies to make him miss you and let you know that you’re on his mind.

In the early stages of dating, it might be too early for him to know that he likes you a lot, but it’s not too early for him to miss spending time with you. You want to remind him of how fantastic a time you have together so that he makes an effort to spend even more with you.

Then the ball’s in your court.

With a few proven strategies to remain always on his mind (shout out to Willie Nelson), you ensure you’re not mooning over him, but instead have his full attention.

Your Coach,

Adam

P.S. Spoiler alert: sex won’t even enter this conversation. A way to make a man miss you is not to impress him in the bedroom and leave him wanting more. Sure, there’s a time and place for that. But first, you want to capture his mind and heart, not his body.

What you will see in this video and article is a lot of mention of being a confident lady. That’s all it takes, friend. Confidence. That’s why I designed the Men Love Confident Women ebook: to give you the tools you need to exude confidence in dating and relationships.

Why You Want to Make Him Miss You Like Crazy

With these strategies, you can make him miss you.

It can feel like you’re a contestant in the Miss America Pageant when you first start dating a guy. You think things are going well, but with dating app FOMO being a real thing — you know: the fact that a guy has at his fingertips an unlimited number of women to choose from, even if they wouldn’t choose him — you feel the need to step up your game so that you take first place in his heart and mind.

Maybe your dating game is on point, but you worry about the time you spend apart. That’s when things have the potential to go off the rails. So you’re strategizing how to make him miss you.

Common sense might tell you that if you want this guy to pay more attention to you, you should go and seek attention from him. Be around more. Call and text frequently.

I’m here to tell you that this is completely the wrong approach.

Being too in-his-face may scare him off. He may think you already want something more serious than he does (even if you don’t). You may come off as needy or desperate.

There are better strategies, Sexy, Confident Lady.

But First: Who This Video is For

For starters, I want to say that this video and these tactics are really designed for single women or women who are casually dating a guy and looking to take things up a notch.

If you’re in a relationship, then this really isn’t the video for you. Why? Because I believe that if you’re in a healthy relationship, then you should be open and honest with your fella about how you’re feeling. If you’re feeling neglected, you know him well enough to bring it up and find ways to rectify the situation.

If you’re just starting to date a guy, you don’t yet know him well enough to open up about your feelings.

If you are single and there is a guy that you are into, and you want him to pay more attention to you, to be more interested in you, then this video is for you. Get ready to take notes!

And another note: none of these tactics are about trying to make him miss you and pay more attention to you in a manipulative way. We’re not trying to trick him into missing you, but rather just nudge him subtly to remind him how awesome a woman you are.

#1: Make Him Miss You by Being a Social Butterfly

Mix and mingle at a party to show him your independent side.

Let’s look at two scenarios:

Lydia and Jon go to a party. She doesn’t really know anyone, so she clings to him shyly all night. He’d like to break free and catch up with his buddies in the corner, but he feels like leaving her will be a bad idea.

Sasha and Brett go to the same party. She doesn’t know anyone either, but immediately lets go of his hand, grabs a drink, and ends up talking to a group of people for an hour. When Brett looks over, she seems to be having a blast.

Do you think Jon or Brett will be more excited about asking his lady out again?

It may be early days in this might-be-a-relationship, but practicing independence early on sets a good precedence. Dr. John Gottman, relationship expert and author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, stresses the importance of autonomy in a relationship. Having different interests, friends, and activities make for a more balanced couple.

And 39% of couples have a healthier relationship because they have independence from one another when they need it.

Now, you may be nowhere near needing to make a marriage work, but the same principles apply. Attend a social function together — but apart, at least some of the time — and I guarantee he will be attracted by your independence.

Okay, Adam, you say, how does that actually work?

At the next party or event you attend together, leave his side and start talking to other people. Maybe you see a friend of your cousin’s. Go say hi, and introduce yourself to her friends. If the music is irresistible, get out there and cut a rug.

Now, this is not to make your date jealous. I don’t want you to start chatting up another guy and then keep looking over to see if he’s paying attention to you talking to some dude.

No, I want you to actually work the room. Be incredibly social and talk to a lot of different people. Some women and some men. Make new friends. Compliment someone on her dress. Forget he’s even in the same room for a while. Have fun.

But know this: he’s going to notice that you’re talking to a lot of people, and that you’re not necessarily engaging with him. He’ll squirrel away this information, and that’s a good thing. Throughout the night, catch his eye across the room (how poetic!) and give him a smile.

And then as the night goes on, let him come to you. You’ll have lots of things to discuss, as you share the conversations and experiences you had that evening. But don’t reattach to him just yet…

#2: Make Him Miss You with the Touch and Flake Technique

A subtle touch will get his attention.

This tactic works following the first one, while you’re still at that party.

I call this highly effective strategy for getting him to miss you the Touch and Flake.

Never underestimate the power of touch. And yet…men are the ones who somehow miss the value. In a recent study, 33% of men said they have never tried touching a woman they like as a way to escalate intimacy.

Wow.

I’m sure those women they didn’t touch were pretty disappointed.

But that just proves my point. A well-planned press of the hand to his big, strong bicep, or a ruffle of his hair can turn him into a big puddle of happiness. After all, physical touch is the most important love language for many men (and women).

So the Touch and Flake requires you to break the touch barrier and touch your guy briefly. Then walk away, leaving him wanting more.

I remember I was once at a party with some friends, and there was a woman who I was really into. It was like she’d read this article: she walked around, talking to different people. I started to want to engage with her, so I approached her.

What did she do?

She put one hand on my chest, one hand on my neck, leaned in, smelled my neck and said, “Mm, you smell good.”

WOW!

Now that’s some girl game. And she knew it. She didn’t stick around after that. She ended the conversation and walked away.

And when she started walking away from me, I remember thinking to myself, “I have to have her in my life.”

You can do this, too.

If you’re sitting down and his hand is on the table, lean in and cup his with yours. Then remove it.

If you’re standing up, put your hand on his shoulder and lean in like you’re telling him a secret. More likely than not, he will automatically put his arm around you. Bonus.

The Touch should be light and fleeting. The Flake comes when you walk away, leaving him wanting more. Remember: you’re in control of the situation, and as long as you’re the one to cut the conversation short, you keep the upper hand.

You’re welcome.

#3: Make Him Miss You By Being Busy

Find hobbies that excite you and make you happy.

Now, don’t misunderstand: this tip isn’t about pretending to be busy, playing hard to get, or making up ridiculous games to make it look like you have a cool life. I’m not suggesting you fake Instagram photos to make it look like you’re doing fabulous things when you’re really in dirty sweats at home on the couch with your dog.

My advice to you, as always, is to have actually a very cool life.

If you’ve been putting all this energy into finding a great guy, it’s time to divert some of that energy into things that will make you happy and whole, regardless of whether you have a partner or not.

Find something interesting to do with your life.

Start traveling.

Commit to finding a hobby that you can do on a regular basis.

About three years ago, I started kitesurfing and it became my passion. (Hey, I’m in good company: Barack Obama and Richard Branson do it!)

So when I’m not working on Sexy Confidence, I enjoy kite surfing. It’s my thing.

And for all you sexy, single ladies out there, it’s so important for you to have your thing. Have your time where you can enjoy yourself without needing to share that time with anyone else. Find something to do that gives you something interesting to talk about when you are around people.

It’ll make you less available to men, and it’ll make you a more interesting person. That combination is ultimately what is going to make a man miss you, want you, and really pay attention to you. He will see that you’re made of substance. That you have interests that you’re not willing to give up to spend time with him

So the next time he asks you out? You might already have plans to hit the climbing gym. Or meet with your book club. Go hiking. Or get mani-pedis with your girls.

He can’t miss you if he’s with you all the time, so make sure your calendar is balanced between spending time with him, spending time with friends, and having alone time doing those things that fulfill you.

Don’t change your plans for him. First off, you need to maintain who you are when you’re in a relationship, so start out dating this guy by setting some ground rules: some activities and events will not be changed because they are important to you. You will fit him in when your schedule allows. A confident woman won’t alter what she’s planned to do for a guy.

While it may seem flattering to have someone change plans to spend with you, a guy might be concerned that you’re too willing to ditch what seemed to matter to you in order to Netflix and chill with him.

Another component of this tip is how available you make yourself via text and phone. I know some women who will answer a call from a man no matter what they’re doing:

“Ted? Is that you?? I don’t have great reception. I’m hiking Kilimanjaro right now. But yea, I can talk for a few minutes!”

Focus on what you’re doing. His call can go to voicemail or his text can go unanswered for a few hours if you’re busy. I’m a big fan of keeping your attention on one thing. And not taking calls during meals or when you’re hanging out with other people.

Don’t be that chick who always jumps up mid-Girls’ Night Out to text her man.

Conclusion:

There’s no trickery needed in making him miss you. It’s a matter of sometimes curbing your enthusiasm about how excited you are to be dating him, and finding ways to assert your independence. Having autonomy, we’ve learned, not only shows him that you’re not a clinging wallflower but that you’re confident and capable of enjoying yourself without being glued to his side.

Having your own interests can go a long way toward making him more interested in you. The more things you’re into, the more he will be into you. And if those hobbies happen to align? Great, but don’t feel like you have to go to the climbing gym with him every single week. If you run into him while there with a friend, do the Touch and Flake and then climb on.

As he realizes that he often misses you and wants to spend more time with you, he’ll start to see the benefit of moving from casual to committed.

So I want to hear from you in the comments right there below. Which one of these three things are you going to focus on the next time you go out with guy? Leave that comment right there below.

And if you’re ready to get the right man to pursue only you, sign up for my free training. But seating is limited, so hurry!

The post 3 Powerful Ways to Make Him Miss You Like Crazy appeared first on Sexy Confidence.

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#IFTTT #Meet Positives SM Feed 3

[fayecallasdatingblog]

3 Powerful Ways to Make Him Miss You Like Crazy

Back in elementary school, when you liked a boy, you could make him miss you by ignoring him…or shoving him in the mud.

Yea, that seems counter-intuitive to make a guy like you, but hey, it worked for the second-grade set.

Now you need more stealthy and effective ways to make him miss you like crazy when you first start dating.

Ever since that first date, he’s all you think about…and you want him to have that same laser focus on you. You know you should play it cool, but you’re just not sure how cool you need to be to get inside his brain and make him want to spend more time with you.

Your girlfriends tell you to ignore his calls. To make him jealous by posting photos of you and other guys on Facebook.

But those aren’t the way to get him to miss you. Those are methods as juvenile as what you did in second grade.

We can do better.

In this video, I will teach you three surefire strategies to make him miss you and let you know that you’re on his mind.

In the early stages of dating, it might be too early for him to know that he likes you a lot, but it’s not too early for him to miss spending time with you. You want to remind him of how fantastic a time you have together so that he makes an effort to spend even more with you.

Then the ball’s in your court.

With a few proven strategies to remain always on his mind (shout out to Willie Nelson), you ensure you’re not mooning over him, but instead have his full attention.

Your Coach,

Adam

P.S. Spoiler alert: sex won’t even enter this conversation. A way to make a man miss you is not to impress him in the bedroom and leave him wanting more. Sure, there’s a time and place for that. But first, you want to capture his mind and heart, not his body.

What you will see in this video and article is a lot of mention of being a confident lady. That’s all it takes, friend. Confidence. That’s why I designed the Men Love Confident Women ebook: to give you the tools you need to exude confidence in dating and relationships.

Why You Want to Make Him Miss You Like Crazy

With these strategies, you can make him miss you.

It can feel like you’re a contestant in the Miss America Pageant when you first start dating a guy. You think things are going well, but with dating app FOMO being a real thing — you know: the fact that a guy has at his fingertips an unlimited number of women to choose from, even if they wouldn’t choose him — you feel the need to step up your game so that you take first place in his heart and mind.

Maybe your dating game is on point, but you worry about the time you spend apart. That’s when things have the potential to go off the rails. So you’re strategizing how to make him miss you.

Common sense might tell you that if you want this guy to pay more attention to you, you should go and seek attention from him. Be around more. Call and text frequently.

I’m here to tell you that this is completely the wrong approach.

Being too in-his-face may scare him off. He may think you already want something more serious than he does (even if you don’t). You may come off as needy or desperate.

There are better strategies, Sexy, Confident Lady.

But First: Who This Video is For

For starters, I want to say that this video and these tactics are really designed for single women or women who are casually dating a guy and looking to take things up a notch.

If you’re in a relationship, then this really isn’t the video for you. Why? Because I believe that if you’re in a healthy relationship, then you should be open and honest with your fella about how you’re feeling. If you’re feeling neglected, you know him well enough to bring it up and find ways to rectify the situation.

If you’re just starting to date a guy, you don’t yet know him well enough to open up about your feelings.

If you are single and there is a guy that you are into, and you want him to pay more attention to you, to be more interested in you, then this video is for you. Get ready to take notes!

And another note: none of these tactics are about trying to make him miss you and pay more attention to you in a manipulative way. We’re not trying to trick him into missing you, but rather just nudge him subtly to remind him how awesome a woman you are.

#1: Make Him Miss You by Being a Social Butterfly

Mix and mingle at a party to show him your independent side.

Let’s look at two scenarios:

Lydia and Jon go to a party. She doesn’t really know anyone, so she clings to him shyly all night. He’d like to break free and catch up with his buddies in the corner, but he feels like leaving her will be a bad idea.

Sasha and Brett go to the same party. She doesn’t know anyone either, but immediately lets go of his hand, grabs a drink, and ends up talking to a group of people for an hour. When Brett looks over, she seems to be having a blast.

Do you think Jon or Brett will be more excited about asking his lady out again?

It may be early days in this might-be-a-relationship, but practicing independence early on sets a good precedence. Dr. John Gottman, relationship expert and author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, stresses the importance of autonomy in a relationship. Having different interests, friends, and activities make for a more balanced couple.

And 39% of couples have a healthier relationship because they have independence from one another when they need it.

Now, you may be nowhere near needing to make a marriage work, but the same principles apply. Attend a social function together — but apart, at least some of the time — and I guarantee he will be attracted by your independence.

Okay, Adam, you say, how does that actually work?

At the next party or event you attend together, leave his side and start talking to other people. Maybe you see a friend of your cousin’s. Go say hi, and introduce yourself to her friends. If the music is irresistible, get out there and cut a rug.

Now, this is not to make your date jealous. I don’t want you to start chatting up another guy and then keep looking over to see if he’s paying attention to you talking to some dude.

No, I want you to actually work the room. Be incredibly social and talk to a lot of different people. Some women and some men. Make new friends. Compliment someone on her dress. Forget he’s even in the same room for a while. Have fun.

But know this: he’s going to notice that you’re talking to a lot of people, and that you’re not necessarily engaging with him. He’ll squirrel away this information, and that’s a good thing. Throughout the night, catch his eye across the room (how poetic!) and give him a smile.

And then as the night goes on, let him come to you. You’ll have lots of things to discuss, as you share the conversations and experiences you had that evening. But don’t reattach to him just yet…

#2: Make Him Miss You with the Touch and Flake Technique

A subtle touch will get his attention.

This tactic works following the first one, while you’re still at that party.

I call this highly effective strategy for getting him to miss you the Touch and Flake.

Never underestimate the power of touch. And yet…men are the ones who somehow miss the value. In a recent study, 33% of men said they have never tried touching a woman they like as a way to escalate intimacy.

Wow.

I’m sure those women they didn’t touch were pretty disappointed.

But that just proves my point. A well-planned press of the hand to his big, strong bicep, or a ruffle of his hair can turn him into a big puddle of happiness. After all, physical touch is the most important love language for many men (and women).

So the Touch and Flake requires you to break the touch barrier and touch your guy briefly. Then walk away, leaving him wanting more.

I remember I was once at a party with some friends, and there was a woman who I was really into. It was like she’d read this article: she walked around, talking to different people. I started to want to engage with her, so I approached her.

What did she do?

She put one hand on my chest, one hand on my neck, leaned in, smelled my neck and said, “Mm, you smell good.”

WOW!

Now that’s some girl game. And she knew it. She didn’t stick around after that. She ended the conversation and walked away.

And when she started walking away from me, I remember thinking to myself, “I have to have her in my life.”

You can do this, too.

If you’re sitting down and his hand is on the table, lean in and cup his with yours. Then remove it.

If you’re standing up, put your hand on his shoulder and lean in like you’re telling him a secret. More likely than not, he will automatically put his arm around you. Bonus.

The Touch should be light and fleeting. The Flake comes when you walk away, leaving him wanting more. Remember: you’re in control of the situation, and as long as you’re the one to cut the conversation short, you keep the upper hand.

You’re welcome.

#3: Make Him Miss You By Being Busy

Find hobbies that excite you and make you happy.

Now, don’t misunderstand: this tip isn’t about pretending to be busy, playing hard to get, or making up ridiculous games to make it look like you have a cool life. I’m not suggesting you fake Instagram photos to make it look like you’re doing fabulous things when you’re really in dirty sweats at home on the couch with your dog.

My advice to you, as always, is to have actually a very cool life.

If you’ve been putting all this energy into finding a great guy, it’s time to divert some of that energy into things that will make you happy and whole, regardless of whether you have a partner or not.

Find something interesting to do with your life.

Start traveling.

Commit to finding a hobby that you can do on a regular basis.

About three years ago, I started kitesurfing and it became my passion. (Hey, I’m in good company: Barack Obama and Richard Branson do it!)

So when I’m not working on Sexy Confidence, I enjoy kite surfing. It’s my thing.

And for all you sexy, single ladies out there, it’s so important for you to have your thing. Have your time where you can enjoy yourself without needing to share that time with anyone else. Find something to do that gives you something interesting to talk about when you are around people.

It’ll make you less available to men, and it’ll make you a more interesting person. That combination is ultimately what is going to make a man miss you, want you, and really pay attention to you. He will see that you’re made of substance. That you have interests that you’re not willing to give up to spend time with him

So the next time he asks you out? You might already have plans to hit the climbing gym. Or meet with your book club. Go hiking. Or get mani-pedis with your girls.

He can’t miss you if he’s with you all the time, so make sure your calendar is balanced between spending time with him, spending time with friends, and having alone time doing those things that fulfill you.

Don’t change your plans for him. First off, you need to maintain who you are when you’re in a relationship, so start out dating this guy by setting some ground rules: some activities and events will not be changed because they are important to you. You will fit him in when your schedule allows. A confident woman won’t alter what she’s planned to do for a guy.

While it may seem flattering to have someone change plans to spend with you, a guy might be concerned that you’re too willing to ditch what seemed to matter to you in order to Netflix and chill with him.

Another component of this tip is how available you make yourself via text and phone. I know some women who will answer a call from a man no matter what they’re doing:

“Ted? Is that you?? I don’t have great reception. I’m hiking Kilimanjaro right now. But yea, I can talk for a few minutes!”

Focus on what you’re doing. His call can go to voicemail or his text can go unanswered for a few hours if you’re busy. I’m a big fan of keeping your attention on one thing. And not taking calls during meals or when you’re hanging out with other people.

Don’t be that chick who always jumps up mid-Girls’ Night Out to text her man.

Conclusion:

There’s no trickery needed in making him miss you. It’s a matter of sometimes curbing your enthusiasm about how excited you are to be dating him, and finding ways to assert your independence. Having autonomy, we’ve learned, not only shows him that you’re not a clinging wallflower but that you’re confident and capable of enjoying yourself without being glued to his side.

Having your own interests can go a long way toward making him more interested in you. The more things you’re into, the more he will be into you. And if those hobbies happen to align? Great, but don’t feel like you have to go to the climbing gym with him every single week. If you run into him while there with a friend, do the Touch and Flake and then climb on.

As he realizes that he often misses you and wants to spend more time with you, he’ll start to see the benefit of moving from casual to committed.

So I want to hear from you in the comments right there below. Which one of these three things are you going to focus on the next time you go out with guy? Leave that comment right there below.

And if you’re ready to get the right man to pursue only you, sign up for my free training. But seating is limited, so hurry!

The post 3 Powerful Ways to Make Him Miss You Like Crazy appeared first on Sexy Confidence.

from Meet Positives SM Feed http://ift.tt/2iZ75Vl via IFTTT

#IFTTT #Meet Positives SM Feed

[egooksconnolly]

Here's why dogs can help you live longer—especially if you're single

Puppies, dogs, mutts, purebreds—we love 'em all. If you're an owner, you know running with your furry friend, and even working out with him, can help you exercise more.

Don't have a dog? Consider adopting one, because people with dogs have healthier hearts, according to new research published in Scientific Reports.

[RELATED1]

In the study, researchers analyzed the correlation between dog ownership and heart health. The sample size was huge: 3.4 million adults ages 40 to 80 living in Sweden over a 12-year period. Why Sweden? Simple: Sweden requires citizens to register their pets under the Board of Agriculture, so the researchers had a ready-made database of families with dogs.

As dog-lovers out there might expect, men and women who welcomed pooches into their respective families were 11% less likely to have heart disease. In fact, dog people were also 33% more likely to live longer.

[PQ]

The reason? Pups provide social and emotional support, keep you active, and even change your body's microbiome like a probiotic. As your French bulldog would like to remind you, dogs carry around new bacteria that can help (though sometimes hurt) your health and mood. For example: Kids who grow up in households with dogs and other pets have a lower risk of asthma and allergies because their bodies are introduced to foreign bacteria and substances at an earlier age, research has shown.

It's not just families with kids, either. "Dog ownership was especially prominent as a protective factor for people living alone," lead study author Mwenya Mubanga said in a press release. That's key, because people who live alone are "at higher risk of cardiovascular disease and death than those living in a multi-person household".

[RELATED2]

Certain breeds can influence the stats, too. Researchers found terriers, retrievers, and scent hounds—pups bred for hunting—were linked with the lowest risk of heart disease.

"Perhaps a dog may stand in as an important family member in the single households," Mubanga said. We certainly think so. So does your French bulldog.

Heart health

Article source here:Men’s Fitness

[rodrigohyde]

Here's why dogs can help you live longer—especially if you're single

Puppies, dogs, mutts, purebreds—we love 'em all. If you're an owner, you know running with your furry friend, and even working out with him, can help you exercise more.

Don't have a dog? Consider adopting one, because people with dogs have healthier hearts, according to new research published in Scientific Reports.

[RELATED1]

In the study, researchers analyzed the correlation between dog ownership and heart health. The sample size was huge: 3.4 million adults ages 40 to 80 living in Sweden over a 12-year period. Why Sweden? Simple: Sweden requires citizens to register their pets under the Board of Agriculture, so the researchers had a ready-made database of families with dogs.

As dog-lovers out there might expect, men and women who welcomed pooches into their respective families were 11% less likely to have heart disease. In fact, dog people were also 33% more likely to live longer.

[PQ]

The reason? Pups provide social and emotional support, keep you active, and even change your body's microbiome like a probiotic. As your French bulldog would like to remind you, dogs carry around new bacteria that can help (though sometimes hurt) your health and mood. For example: Kids who grow up in households with dogs and other pets have a lower risk of asthma and allergies because their bodies are introduced to foreign bacteria and substances at an earlier age, research has shown.

It's not just families with kids, either. "Dog ownership was especially prominent as a protective factor for people living alone," lead study author Mwenya Mubanga said in a press release. That's key, because people who live alone are "at higher risk of cardiovascular disease and death than those living in a multi-person household".

[RELATED2]

Certain breeds can influence the stats, too. Researchers found terriers, retrievers, and scent hounds—pups bred for hunting—were linked with the lowest risk of heart disease.

"Perhaps a dog may stand in as an important family member in the single households," Mubanga said. We certainly think so. So does your French bulldog.

Heart health

from Men's Fitness https://www.mensfitness.com/life/entertainment/heres-why-dogs-can-help-you-live-longer-especially-if-youre-single

#Men's Fitness

[njawaidofficial]

Snapchat Content Chief Reveals Key to Creating Shows for Mobile

http://styleveryday.com/2017/08/24/snapchat-content-chief-reveals-key-to-creating-shows-for-mobile/

Snapchat Content Chief Reveals Key to Creating Shows for Mobile

“Whether it’s a puking rainbow or a dancing hot dog, we create cultural moments,” says Nick Bell as he also shares the pros of vertical video and cons of long-form and live programming.

Nick Bell was just 16 when he sold his first company, Teenfront.com, a teen editorial brand. Several years later, after launching a failed online video startup, the Newcastle, England, native landed at Rupert Murdoch’s British newspaper business, which transferred him to New York in 2013 to work on digital products for News Corp. As part of that job, Bell arranged a meeting between Murdoch and Snap Inc. CEO Evan Spiegel. The powwow didn’t amount to much for Murdoch, but it did lead to Bell taking a job at the then-fledgling messaging app.

Now Snap’s head of content, Bell, 33, is charged with creating video programming that will keep Snapchat’s 173 million daily users engaged, the key to fighting rival Facebook for advertiser dollars. Snapchat received a $500 million investment from NBCUniversal and has struck deals with some 70-odd media partners, including E!, Cosmopolitan, ESPN and CNN, for both Discover (daily digests) and Shows (short serialized videos). “The biggest revelation for us out of Discover was that shortform video doesn’t work on mobile,” says Bell. “Mobile video is a new format.”

To that end, Bell isn’t so much looking to replace TV as augment it. “Mobile is not a TV killer,” he said Aug. 23 during an appearance at the Edinburgh TV Festival, where he also revealed that Snapchat plans to introduce scripted programming to its lineup by the end of the year. 

While Bell is gaining momentum in Hollywood, Snap has yet to impress Wall Street. The company’s stock price has dropped more than 50 percent since it went public in March as user growth stalls and losses widened to $433 million last quarter.

Bell, who lives in Brentwood with his fiancee, Sara Praw, a Universal Pictures consumer products manager, works alongside his development team in Marina del Rey. He sat down with THR at Snap’s main office in Venice (where he also frequently works) to reveal what he’s learned about the mobile landscape, how he’s planning to approach scripted content and to whom he turns for advice. 

What kind of video works best on Snapchat?

The audience is basically developing this language of what mobile video is. Some of it’s really obvious, like vertical video. Everybody who comes in the door at Snap and is pitching us knows that it has got to be vertical. When shooting people, you shoot them slightly off-center and from an arm’s distance because when people are sending selfies of themselves, that’s the perspective. It feels authentic and, therefore, should follow through to anything that we produce professionally as well. Snapchatters add doodles, which are all about having an additional layer of context, and that comes through as professional onscreen graphics. [E! Entertainment’s] The Rundown does a great job with this.

Will Snapchat venture into scripted programming?

Scripted is really exciting and an area we’re going to go into. But what we want to do first is prove the format and refine the format. Scripted is expensive, so we want to make sure that we go out with a really good first effort. We spent a lot of time thinking about what would lend itself well to Snap — how you develop characters, what the narrative and the story arcs look like when you’re telling these stories in a short format, the importance of episodic content and what happens in this world where people can miss content. Do you make previous episodes available? We’re really excited about something that is very regular and people can tune in to on a daily basis, potentially. We’re also thinking about what content can travel borders.

Would you consider doing long-form video?

I know people do watch full seasons of 13 Reasons Why on their mobile device, but I don’t think it’s the best place to watch it. The best experiences are made-for-mobile content. Our approach has been slightly different to some of the other tech platforms out there who think about desktop and mobile and OTT in the same breath. We don’t. We think about mobile experiences. What we’re finding right now is the optimum length is four to five minutes.

What kinds of projects do you get pitched?

Very early on, everybody was pitching us scripted series that were kind of Blair Witch-esque, where everything was shot on Snapchat. That just didn’t really resonate. We found that meetings went one of two ways: People wanted to do marketing for something else they were working on or people wanted to do stuff that hadn’t landed elsewhere.

What kind of programming are you looking for right now?

Our approach is that it’s an art, not a science. We’re not afraid to have opinions. We are not an open platform, and we really value scarcity. We want to get to a point where we’ve got three things a day by the end of this year — not hundreds. We know what we want and we’re going out and we’re finding that. The other thing that’s important is, we like new IP. We don’t want to take IP that’s being tried elsewhere and try to import it to our platform. For me, what’s really interesting is The Rundown, Phone Swap and Second Chance, where we’ve worked with creators to think up new stuff that’s going to be really interesting. The show that we’re doing with James Corden is something new. It’s original.

With the launch of Facebook’s new video initiative, how will Snapchat stay competitive in mobile video?

We continue to innovate. We continue to take bets. We continue to evolve our thinking. Other platforms are a couple of steps behind on most of this stuff and I’m really proud of that. We hope to continue that. We’re really focused on what the format is and on working with the best people in the industry.

How have Snapchat’s recent growth problems impacted viewership of Shows?

If you look at the base we have, it’s an audience using smartphones with good data plans in developed markets, so it’s people who are able to access the content. What makes me proud about Snapchat is, whether it’s a puking rainbow or a dancing hot dog, we create cultural moments, and we’re starting to do that with the Shows content.

Why hasn’t Snapchat followed Facebook and Twitter into live programming?

There are a few examples where I think live works really well, and that is where there is a pre-planned event — whether it is a news conference or a sporting match — or where something unfolds where there’s going to be payoff, like a car chase. The problem with live in many cases is, if you allow someone to just start airing and publishing content, and you reward the number of minutes that are published, then it creates a lot of trash.

Would you ever go after rights for a live sporting event?

We’ve got no immediate plans to stream whole games, but I think the ability to bring those moments that matter through Snapchatters is really exciting.

What did you learn from when Snapchat was producing more of its own content via the now-disbanded Snap Channel on Discover?

For us to have the depth of talent and the quality of talent [in-house] that we’ve tapped into across the handful of shows that we’ve done so far, would be very challenging as a company. We’ve worked with some incredible folks. We’re shooting a season with Ben [Winston] and James Corden at the moment. It would be very difficult for us to hire those people on staff here at Snapchat. What we’ve been able to do is tap a much broader slate and a much broader bench of talent. I like to think it’s a true partnership. We bring to the table not only distribution but a lot of thinking and a lot of data and insight around mobile. Great storytellers get really excited by that.

After years working for a traditional media company, what led you to join Snapchat?

Evan and I connected pretty quickly because when we were talking about product, we were talking about the philosophy of the product, rather than pixels and buttons. One thing I’ve come to learn with Evan is that all of the product ideas start with these sort of philosophical approaches to problems — or to opportunities, if you like. We started talking about what was wrong with the world of digital content and what was great about TV and print, and how we could take some of the pillars and cornerstones of TV and print and bring them into the mobile world. An hour and a half into the conversation, it started to formalize into a product that I started to kind of pitch him, and then he smiled and showed me an early prototype of what was Discover. It was pretty crude, and it was certainly a long way from the product that we launched, but we certainly shared a vision.

How involved does Evan Spiegel get with the content decisions?

Philosophically, very involved. He gives his opinions on stuff, but he trusts us to go and do this. I couldn’t ask for a more supportive CEO, and I value his opinions because of who he is, not because he’s my boss.

Do you ask for guidance from Michael Lynton, the former Sony CEO who is now Snap chairman?

Michael has been an incredible supporter and mentor for me, and I really value his opinion. I speak to him very regularly.

Whom else do you turn to for advice?

I’ve got a lot of respect for [television producer] Michael Davies. I’ve got a lot of respect for [Late Late Show exec producer] Ben Winston. I’m really interested in what Jeffrey Katzenberg is doing with New TV, and we’ve spent a lot of time discussing what mobile looks like in the future.

A version of this story first appeared in the Aug. 23 issue of The Hollywood Reporter magazine. To receive the magazine, click here to subscribe.

#Chief #Content #Creating #Key #Mobile #Reveals #Shows #Snapchat

#Chief #Content #Creating #Key #Mobile #Reveals #Shows #Snapchat

[northshoregadgets]

Buying a Home for Your Dog? You’re Not Alone (Plus, How to Introduce Your Dog to Your New Home!)

A few months ago, my partner and I sold our Co-Op apartment in New York and bought a house to give our dogs a better life. Some of our friends thought we were a little crazy, but it turns out we weren’t alone! A new study shows that dogs are more important than marriage and kids to millennial home buyers. Let’s look at the stats when it comes to buying a home for your dog and how to help your dog adjust to your new home.

Buying a home for your dog? Here’s what to know! Photography by Shutterstock.

A New Study Shows That One-Third of Millennials Buy Homes with Their Dogs in Mind

The new study from SunTrust Mortgage explored what factors contributed to millennials aged 18-36 purchasing homes. One-third (33%) of millennial homeowners said that wanting to provide their dogs with more space — such as yards for dogs — was the driving reason behind purchasing a home. In this study, dogs ranked among the top three motivators for millennial home buyers, and were cited more frequently than current or impending marriage and children.

Only 25 percent of those surveyed were looking to purchase a home because of marriage, and just 19 percent said they were buying because of the birth of a child. The SunTrust Mortgage study also found that among millennials who had not yet purchased a first home, 42 percent say that their dog, or the desire add a dog to their family, was the key factor in planning to purchase a house in the future!

Statistics show that more millennials are buying homes for their dogs. Infographic courtesy SunTrust Mortgage.

3 Pro Tips for Helping Your Dog Adjust to a New Home

Austin-based veterinarian Dr. Hunter Bowen has expert advice for dog parents who are purchasing a home:

Establish Familiar Places in Your House

Anything that keeps the new house similar to the old house will help your dog transition. Dogs like routine, so even small things like putting the water and food bowls in the same place in relation to the crate will help your dog feel secure. Keep the dog bed/crate in the same space, too. If your dog’s bed was in your old home’s kitchen, place it in your new home’s kitchen.

Don’t Change Your Routinely Too Drastically 

Factors like different commute times may throw off feeding and walking times but try to keep things as close to your old schedule as possible. Also, it’s tempting to buy all new stuff for a new house, but let your dog get used to the new home before replacing toys, beds, bowls and leashes. Remember: never be too rigid with routines or it could create even more anxiety for your dog!

Hire a Dog Sitter for Moving Day

The most stressful part of the move is the hustle and bustle of the packing boxes and loading the truck. This is a great time to board your dog or send him to grandma/a friend. Bring your dog to the new house once all is calm!

More Tips on Getting Your Dog to Love Your New Home

Take your dog to the new home several times before you move in. Bring familiar toys and bedding to help your dog instantly feel at home.

Get new ID tags that include the new address. Update your dog’s contact information with the microchip company as well!

Purchasing a new house or renovating a fixer-upper? Talk with the builder and your real estate agent about avoiding materials that are toxic to your dog.

Moving is stressful and might cause some behavioral backslides. Dogs who are fully housebroken may have accidents, or display other behaviors like marking in the new home. Moving to a new home is a great time to brush up on your foundation training. Go back to basics, reward your dog for going potty outside like you would a young puppy or sign up for a refresher course with a local trainer.

What Dog Owners Should Keep in Mind When House Hunting:

Look for a dog park or open spaces, beaches or walking paths near the house.

Check out dog-friendly Home Owner’s Association (HOA) restrictions and other laws (there are places that don’t allow certain breeds or sizes of dogs — be aware these laws can change even after you buy).

A fenced-in yard is a must. If you are purchasing a townhouse or condo, find a fenced-in porch where dog can’t get out between bars or easily jump over. If your new home doesn’t have a solid fence, factor the cost of adding one into your overall home-buying expenses.

Seek out dog-friendly floors — wood, tile and laminate are best. Try to avoid carpet.

Mud rooms are a bonus! It’s helpful to have a place to wipe your dog’s paws before he enters the home — especially on rainy days.

Ensure there’s enough room and storage space for all your dog’s stuff: crates, beds, dishes and more.

Find a bathtub that’s sized properly for your dog, or better yet a dedicated dog wash station!

Thumbnail: Photography by Wavebreakmedia/Thinkstock.

Read more about dogs and your home on Dogster.com:

Tips for Dog Safety During Home Renovations

Moving with Dogs: How to Introduce Your Pup to Your New Home

11 Stylish Ways to Dogify Your Home Décor

Sassafras Lowrey is an award-winning author. Her novels have been honored by organizations ranging from the Lambda Literary Foundation to the American Library Association. Sassafras is a Certified Trick Dog Trainer, and assists with dog agility classes. Sassafras lives and writes in Brooklyn with her partner, a senior Chihuahua mix, a rescued Shepherd mix and a Newfoundland puppy, along with two bossy cats and a semi-feral kitten. Learn more at sassafraslowrey.com.

The post Buying a Home for Your Dog? You’re Not Alone (Plus, How to Introduce Your Dog to Your New Home!) appeared first on Dogster.

from Dogster http://ift.tt/2uMSfB3 via http://www.dogster.com

#Pets

[stiles-wtf]

Buying a Home for Your Dog? You’re Not Alone (Plus, How to Introduce Your Dog to Your New Home!)

A few months ago, my partner and I sold our Co-Op apartment in New York and bought a house to give our dogs a better life. Some of our friends thought we were a little crazy, but it turns out we weren’t alone! A new study shows that dogs are more important than marriage and kids to millennial home buyers. Let’s look at the stats when it comes to buying a home for your dog and how to help your dog adjust to your new home.

Buying a home for your dog? Here’s what to know! Photography by Shutterstock.

A New Study Shows That One-Third of Millennials Buy Homes with Their Dogs in Mind

The new study from SunTrust Mortgage explored what factors contributed to millennials aged 18-36 purchasing homes. One-third (33%) of millennial homeowners said that wanting to provide their dogs with more space — such as yards for dogs — was the driving reason behind purchasing a home. In this study, dogs ranked among the top three motivators for millennial home buyers, and were cited more frequently than current or impending marriage and children.

Only 25 percent of those surveyed were looking to purchase a home because of marriage, and just 19 percent said they were buying because of the birth of a child. The SunTrust Mortgage study also found that among millennials who had not yet purchased a first home, 42 percent say that their dog, or the desire add a dog to their family, was the key factor in planning to purchase a house in the future!

Statistics show that more millennials are buying homes for their dogs. Infographic courtesy SunTrust Mortgage.

3 Pro Tips for Helping Your Dog Adjust to a New Home

Austin-based veterinarian Dr. Hunter Bowen has expert advice for dog parents who are purchasing a home:

Establish Familiar Places in Your House

Anything that keeps the new house similar to the old house will help your dog transition. Dogs like routine, so even small things like putting the water and food bowls in the same place in relation to the crate will help your dog feel secure. Keep the dog bed/crate in the same space, too. If your dog’s bed was in your old home’s kitchen, place it in your new home’s kitchen.

Don’t Change Your Routinely Too Drastically 

Factors like different commute times may throw off feeding and walking times but try to keep things as close to your old schedule as possible. Also, it’s tempting to buy all new stuff for a new house, but let your dog get used to the new home before replacing toys, beds, bowls and leashes. Remember: never be too rigid with routines or it could create even more anxiety for your dog!

Hire a Dog Sitter for Moving Day

The most stressful part of the move is the hustle and bustle of the packing boxes and loading the truck. This is a great time to board your dog or send him to grandma/a friend. Bring your dog to the new house once all is calm!

More Tips on Getting Your Dog to Love Your New Home

Take your dog to the new home several times before you move in. Bring familiar toys and bedding to help your dog instantly feel at home.

Get new ID tags that include the new address. Update your dog’s contact information with the microchip company as well!

Purchasing a new house or renovating a fixer-upper? Talk with the builder and your real estate agent about avoiding materials that are toxic to your dog.

Moving is stressful and might cause some behavioral backslides. Dogs who are fully housebroken may have accidents, or display other behaviors like marking in the new home. Moving to a new home is a great time to brush up on your foundation training. Go back to basics, reward your dog for going potty outside like you would a young puppy or sign up for a refresher course with a local trainer.

What Dog Owners Should Keep in Mind When House Hunting:

Look for a dog park or open spaces, beaches or walking paths near the house.

Check out dog-friendly Home Owner’s Association (HOA) restrictions and other laws (there are places that don’t allow certain breeds or sizes of dogs — be aware these laws can change even after you buy).

A fenced-in yard is a must. If you are purchasing a townhouse or condo, find a fenced-in porch where dog can’t get out between bars or easily jump over. If your new home doesn’t have a solid fence, factor the cost of adding one into your overall home-buying expenses.

Seek out dog-friendly floors — wood, tile and laminate are best. Try to avoid carpet.

Mud rooms are a bonus! It’s helpful to have a place to wipe your dog’s paws before he enters the home — especially on rainy days.

Ensure there’s enough room and storage space for all your dog’s stuff: crates, beds, dishes and more.

Find a bathtub that’s sized properly for your dog, or better yet a dedicated dog wash station!

Thumbnail: Photography by Wavebreakmedia/Thinkstock.

Read more about dogs and your home on Dogster.com:

Tips for Dog Safety During Home Renovations

Moving with Dogs: How to Introduce Your Pup to Your New Home

11 Stylish Ways to Dogify Your Home Décor

Sassafras Lowrey is an award-winning author. Her novels have been honored by organizations ranging from the Lambda Literary Foundation to the American Library Association. Sassafras is a Certified Trick Dog Trainer, and assists with dog agility classes. Sassafras lives and writes in Brooklyn with her partner, a senior Chihuahua mix, a rescued Shepherd mix and a Newfoundland puppy, along with two bossy cats and a semi-feral kitten. Learn more at sassafraslowrey.com.

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