#because it took...fuckin' FOREVER

[imogenkol]

— Original Character Directory —

here is a basic list of active ocs I have created (+ their ships) that will hopefully make it easier for anyone curious about them to find information as well as for my own organizational purposes. This will be updated with new ocs as well!

STAR WARS:

Imogen Kol (Jedi Games/Andor) [tag] [pinterest]

Adhira Berkana (Ahsoka) [tag] [pinterest]

Feraleth Stendar (The High Republic) [tag]

Zephyrine Abraxas (The High Republic) [tag] [pinterest]

Leera Locke (The Mandalorian) [pinterest]

THE LAST OF US:

Morgan Reed (Game) [tag] [pinterest]

Raleigh Pierce (Game) [tag]

Beck Emerson (HBO Show) [tag]

CYBERPUNK 2077:

Vaune Iyer [tag] [pinterest]

BALDUR’S GATE 3:

Hael Ashwood [tag] [pinterest]

FAR CRY 5:

Lorna Holt [tag] [pinterest]

Rocky Blackburn

SKYRIM:

Yrsa Gunnr [tag] [pinterest]

Kåre Battle-Born [tag]

RED DEAD REDEMPTION 2:

Theodora Thorne [tag] [pinterest]

CALL OF DUTY:

Genevieve Cohen [tag] [pinterest]

VARIOUS:

Eddy (Dungeons & Dragons/Baldur’s Gate 3/The Golden Rose) [tag] [pinterest]

ORIGINAL WORKS:

Jayde Thatcher [tag] [pinterest]

Nadya Bishop [tag] [pinterest]

Skye Thatcher

Toby Cortez

Andrea Thatcher

Tristan Thatcher

The Lodge [tag] [pinterest]

SHIPS:

Imogen x Bix Caleen [tag]

Imogen & Cal Kestis (frenemies) [tag]

Jayde x Nadya [tag]

Vaune x Panam Palmer [tag]

Hael x Shadowheart [tag]

Adhira x Shin Hati x Sabine Wren [tag]

Yrsa x Kåre [tag]

#don’t mind me just making a pinned post here #holy fuckin shit this took forever #and there are still a couple ocs/ships I didn’t add because they’re basically inactive rn #I mean some on this kinda are too ngl but. #at least his is here and everyone who has a tag and a Pinterest has been linked so #I hate sharing my Pinterest because everyone else’s is so organized and curated #and a good chunk of mine need a lot of work….. #but fuck it here we are!!!

[tigergendermoved]

Remembering the toxic hellscape that was 2015-2019ish SU fandom and just how much hate the show got is really insane when you rewatch the show after it's been a while. Like the show is good what the hell were any of these people talking about

#do NOT quote me on those numbers i pulled them straight out of my ass #like the ending was rushed and the diamonds didnt get to be fully developed but liek #the whole reason that was the case is there was an entire 6th season planned #and then the show got axed early because rebecca sugar and crew refused the back down on the rupphire wedding. #and even rushedness aside like the point of the show was never that you should hug fascists and forgive people no matter what #the diamond were rose's (and his) dysfunctional family whose personal suffering became the basis for the cruelty of gem society #bismuth in The Real World would have been right to want to kill the diamonds as a force of revolution #but the point of the show is that even the most complicated people are still people who can change. even if you dont forgive them #even steven quartz universe the most loving boy in the world very obviously does not like being around the diamonds. but that is how it is #it was a children's show that emphasized compassion and communication and family as themes. of course steven didnt kill the diamonds lol #i really fully believe the stevenbomb format (which was not the crew's choice or fault) cooked peoples' brains #you had months between major arcs so every wrongdoing by a character had months to be warped and misinterpreted and so no resolution could #ever satisfy fans who were festering with their own opinions for way too long #like these arcs looking back are not that long and they resolve in fairly reasonable manners but they took fuckin forever in real time to #wrap up #and ppl on the internet with no other hobbies than arguing made the fandom suck to be in and gave su a bad name #even if you dont like steven universe i think the amount of vitriol thrown at the show is/was fucking INSANE for what it is lmaooo #people were so so jolly to accuse rebecca sugar (a jewish lady) of being a fascist/fash sympathizer and paint every writing shortcoming or #morally dubious character action as a sign of pure fuckin evil #ok that was a long ass fuckin rant in the tags i am so sorry i'm just kind of opinionated on this matter as i am all matters #i've been rewatching su with my dad lately and this very normal and well paced and fun watchthrough experience has been illuminating #just how insane and uncalled for the hellish discourse sphere around su was/is #i say was/is i have no idea what su discourse is like nowadays. i'm too scareds to look in the su crit tag

[lyssified]

GOOD MORNING TUMBLR

i have made a severe and continuous lapse in judgement and, instead of getting the proper amount of sleep i decided to pin curl my hair :)

#so that's a thing i did #it was really fun to sleep in bc i had to put a hair thing over it and i look like an egg :) #i used like... way too many bobby pins #and it took forever cus my hair is not the fuckin length that you're meant to pin curl hair with #we did this on one of our actors for a play #this was like my techniqe for how to get her hair super curly super fast #we would pin curl the top half and wait for it to set while we did the bottom #it damaged her hair so much but the director insisted lmao #so this is me.. i guess trying to see what it was like for her #she had to spend 1hr 15m in thr hair chair a day #that was literally my only job because it took so long

[propajanda]

I know I say this all the time but this time I really mean it… this is forever night

#look on your calendar Mickey #I circled a date for you #you don’t see anything? #that’s because I lied #Mickey it’s not forever night #Mickey I lied and you took the fuckin bait

[winterskyfirefly]

.

#fuckin christ im doin bad tonight #where i went for drinks tonight is one of the last places i went with my mother #she couldn't get up the six steps #she collapsed and had to sit until someone helped her inside #we drank and she fell going down the steps and wet herself and i sat there comforting her and telling her there was no shame and i loved he #and i was angry and furious at the last fourteen years of her suffering and having to care for her more and more because she couldn't #she inhaled chlorine gas in an accident cleaning our pool 14 years ago called 911 and then passed out and then basically ... was in a coma #she was unconscious for fucking however knows i forget i dont want to remember but she lost all muscle use and had to relearn ... everythin #her lungs were shot and she was forever weak and she was in the hospital from simple colds but she would be intubated and afraid #she had oxygen 24/7 and a walker and she fell a lot and she couldn't lift a gallon of milk she couldn't open cans of vegetables or sodas #for years taking meds and getting sicker weaker and then she died maybe three months after this trip to this place tonight #i watched as she got sicker and i took more care of her and wondered if i'd ever have a life and now i still wonder if i'll ever have a lif #she loved me but she'd say she hated me when i could open the cans she needed opened or could pick up something #i carried her oxygen everywhere and waited for her and picked her up and cleaned her up when she fell #when she fell out of bed after drinking and cracked her skin and it bled (the meds made her more prone to this) and i would pick her up #except when i couldnt and she couldn't help and she'd tell me to leave her on the floor and i couldn't so she would call for my stepfather #and he would come upstairs and scream at her and pick her up #then whenever she fell after for months he'd hear and come storming to scream and i'd hear #i took care of her i cleaned her up when she fell and was bloody i washed her sheets i told her i loved her i was patient #i took photos of her bloody head where the temple was cut when she slammed her head into her dresser #she said shed quit drinking never did she never got better #i knew she wouldn't but i wish it was different and i wish she couldn't have had better and more #i wish she didn't have the last 14 years of her life become less and less and less and she was a wonderful person who deserved better #and it hurts tonight

[willows-peak]

heyyy, I've literally never requested before so I'm kinda nervous but...

could you write about getting eaten out for the first time with jjk men? reader is insecure and worried they won't like it??

Yes yes ofc <33 i luv writing this stuff ty anon

*･ﾟ✧ Munch City

tags: multi character x reader, fem! reader, oral (f! receiving) dirty talk, insecurity, first time, face sitting, doggy position, pussy! whipped choso because it's choso, slight massaging,

word count: 3.4k

MDNI

a/n: I'm soooo sorry this took forever!! the fire alarms have been going off 24/7 and it's been super annoying 😭 I made this a lil shorter than i'd wanted for times sake, I'm very sorry nonnie </3

⋆｡˚ ♡ Gojo: is gonna talk you through it step by step, and how it makes him feel doing it

You're sitting at the edge of your bed, legs spread open by Gojo's wide shoulders, with him grinning eagerly at the display in front of him.

He almost rolled his eyes at you when you first voiced your concerns, finding the mere idea of him *not* liking this ridiculous. But when he saw the hurt in your eyes from his reaction, he was quick to come back and reassure you that yes, he wanted to do this because yes, you are beautiful to him.

His eyes didn't miss the way you clenched around nothing at his praise, the grin he lost earlier creeping its way back onto his face as he started to come up with an idea. He pried your thighs back open as he leaned into your core, nose pressing against the top of your pussy as he pressed a light kiss against your clit.

The way his tongue flicked over your sensitive clit made your back arch up against him, hearing him chuckle against you. "That felt good, didn't it? When I lick your clit just like this" Gojo teased, sly eyes peering up at you as he flattened his tongue down against it, letting it drag down against you until the tip of it reached your hole. You covered your mouth with the knuckle of your finger as he hummed, the tip of his tongue circling around it gingerly.

You could feel the way Gojo was lapping up the wetness that came out of you, moving his tongue up inside of you while you muffled a cry into your hand, feeling him quietly groan against your cunt. "You're so sexy when you moan like that, makes my dick throb so hard." he dragged out his words as he lifted up your leg, placing it onto his shoulder before burying himself into your cunt and grinding his nose down against your now swollen bud.

Wet, thick swipes of his tongue made their way all across your cunt as he closed his eyes, panting for a few seconds before diving back in like a man who was starved. "Fuckin' love how you squeeze around my tongue, keep doing that, please," Gojo panted out, not wasting another moment before shoving his warm tongue back inside of you, the tip of it coming up to thrust against your g-spot. You cried out his name again as your hand shot down to grab at his hair, legs spreading wider to feel more of him.

The combination of Gojo's strong arms flexing, pinning your thighs down to the bed, and his messy tongue slurping and fucking your hole was making you dizzy, shuddering at how soaked Gojo's cheeks were when he pulled away to talk to you. He looked up at you with such a clouded-over expression, his bright blue eyes glittering through his thin, white lashes. Every moan you made only egged Gojo on further, your head tossing back as Gojo's mouth came to wrap back around your clit, groaning along with you and replacing his tongue with his slender middle finger.

"It taste g-good, 'toru?" You asked, your voice wavering as he nodded into you, making little 'mhm's and popping off of your clit to clean up more of your wetness. "Fuck yes, tastes so good honey, lemme keep doing this for you, please baby-" He begged, almost leaping back down on your cunt when you nodded.

⋆｡˚ ♡ Getou: makes you watch him jerk off while he’s grinding his nose into your clit

You're hovering above Getou's face, thighs being held apart while he licks his lips at how wet you are.

Though when his plea for you to lower yourself onto his lips already was met with nothing, he glanced up at your worried expression with a matching one. His hands glided down the smooth expanse of your thighs and rested just above your knees, giving them small rubs as you fiddled around with your nails.

Getou bit his lip as he felt himself twitch in his boxers in tandem with a stray drop of wetness flowing down your inner thigh, swallowing thickly as he attempted to remain composed for you. He knew that right now, what mattered most was your comfort, especially for your first time, even when you were looking unfairly hot above him like this.

"Turn around baby, lemme do something," Getou spoke, voice soft with arousal as he loosened his hold on your legs. You were reluctant, unsure what Getou was planning, but you complied either way, shuffling around until you were flipped to face the opposite wall of your bedroom. "Watch me," Getou instructed, your eyes fixated on his body lying flat against the bed. You stilled yourself as you watched his arm, making its way down to the bulge that you'd failed to notice until now.

Getou grinned at how you throbbed when he pulled his boxers down, sighing loudly with relief as he brushed his finger over his leaking tip, smearing pre cum over it while starting to pull your hips down towards his face. "See that? Look at how hard I am, all for your pussy." He whispered, making you shiver at how you could feel the vibration of his voice dancing along your skin, your back arched as you leaned your stomach down onto his neck, to avoid smothering his face with your butt.

"Fuck..." He murmured, pinching his thumb and pointer finger down onto his tip before thrusting his hand down, sticking his tongue out to gingerly lick at your exposed pussy. You squeaked in surprise, Getou taking the opportunity and shoving you down onto his face. You whimpered at the base moan that he let out, the hand wrapped around his cock quickly stroking it up and down while he messily started to eat you out.

You made a broken moan of his name as your hips were shoved back and forth across his face, eyes locked on how desperately he fucked into his fist at your taste. You spread your thighs open more so his tongue could get deeper inside you, gasping when it curled up against your slit and massaged your clit with the back of his tongue. You clenched down around nothing from the constant and intense stimulation, whimpering and moaning and crying out shamelessly as Getou's tongue lapped at your cunt.

His husky grunts and shuddering groans vibrated deliciously against you, making you ache with how turned on you were getting from all this. Anytime you tried pulling your hips up, his hand pushed down harder to keep you in place, your upper half bowing down in pleasure as the fast, slick sounds of Getou getting himself off fell in tandem with your moans.

⋆｡˚ ♡ Choso: tells you how much he loves your pussy while he eats

With a pillow underneath you, almost like Choso is serving you on a platter, your thighs are wrapped snuggly around Choso's neck.

You weren't able to hide your apprehension long, with how Choso was always looking up at you between your legs as his mouth made its way up your inner thighs. He noticed immediately how you seemed to want to look anywhere but where he was, peaking his head up and calling your name in concern.

Meeting his eyes made you relax, if only by a little bit, as you hesitantly asked Choso why he was doing this for you. Your question, when it managed to reach his ears, left Choso close to baffled. He could think of nothing else he should be doing for you, with how willingly you've taught him about pleasing you.

"I love you," Choso spoke, his voice full of certainty as he looked up at you. You blushed at his words, not expecting such a heartfelt statement as a response. "I'm in love with you. Of course, I'm gonna do this." He stated as if it was something so obvious he didn't need to point it out. "I...I love you too, but, are you sure you're gonna like it?" You asked again, feeling the words get stuck in your throat at the hungry way Choso was eyeing your cunt.

You gasped as Choso dived back down, nestling himself comfortably between your thighs, his hot breath passing up your cunt and making you shiver from how exposed you felt. "I love how good you look..." He breathed out, pressing sloppy kisses to your cunt while messily licking up any wetness clinging to your lips. You mewled into your hand as he continued. "Love how good you taste," Choso spoke, sounding like every second spent with his lips not on your cunt was a waste of his time.

The hand that once was covering your mouth now shot down to bury into Choso's hair, fingers curling around the dark strands as he let his eyes close in bliss from the taste of your pussy. "You're so good, looks so pretty down here," Choso mumbled, paying no mind to the harsh grip of your fingers in his hair as he put sloppy kiss after kiss against every part of your cunt. "Wanna make you feel good, I love this so much" The constant praise with the desperate sucks and grinds down into your opening made you moan helplessly, humping down into Choso's mouth and being met with his own grunts and whines of need.

"So good, so pretty, tastes so perfect," he chanted, his tongue curling to lick up every ounce of wetness that leaked out of you. More muffled moans of your name were heard as Choso buried himself into your sopping wet cunt, his thick tongue finding its way inside you and making you cry out loudly. "Give it t' me, please honey, I need it-" Choso begged into you, shaking his head as his nose harshly rubbed against your clit. Your voice was cutting itself off from how intense the pleasure Choso gave you was, tossing your head from side to side as you took everything Choso selflessly gave to you.

⋆｡˚ ♡ Nanami: gives your thighs a massage to relax you, slowly kissing upwards until his mouth is above your cunt

He has you face down, ass up against the comforter of your bed, spreading apart the fat of your thigh enough to get to your pussy.

He had thought this position would make it easier on you for your first time, with the lack of eye contact. But, he could still feel how stiff your body was under his touch, gasps of shock rather than pleasure leaving your lips whenever he let his fingers travel too close to your cunt.

Nanami's low voice cut through the tense silence surrounding you, your head whipping around to face him. You could feel how his hands were wrapped around the point between your ass and your thighs, not spread open anymore as you nervously glanced away. Nanami seemed to understand you without any words being said, gently pulling your knees apart before speaking.

"Relax for me, dear, there's nothing to worry about." He reassured, his gruff and low voice full of tenderness as he spoke to you. After watching your back smoothen out from the arch it was in, Nanami gently squeezed your thighs, working his thumbs in a downward motion to ease any tension that had built up in your body. Your head came up as Nanami placed a kiss on your lower back, your hips moving back against him slightly.

Nanami's hands seemed to work into your thigh with practiced ease, the slow, chaste kisses being planted across your lower back while his hands inched their way up your thigh to grope at your ass making you breathe shakily. You made a sound of surprise when you felt him push your cheeks apart, the warmth of his hands staying against your ass while your cunt was exposed to the cool air of the bedroom. "There she is..." Nanami's voice sent chills up from the base of your spine, the vibration of his voice making you squirm in his grip.

"I'm gonna use my tongue, is that ok, dear?" The curtness of his words sent a spike of arousal straight towards your pussy, forcing out a small 'mhm' before attempting to keep your body relaxed and pliant. "Ohh-" you let out, eyes shooting open as Nanami ran his tongue down your slit, taking his time to taste every inch of you before flicking his tongue across your puffy clit. Your eyelids fluttered as you pressed your hips back against his tongue, whining out when he pulled back from your wetness.

You only got a small kiss on your opening before he let his mouth roam back up, resting on your lower back and making small love bites against it. "Did that feel good, beautiful?" He asked, smiling against your skin when you shuffled against his body in response, a noise of complaint being muffled by the pillow underneath you. His middle finger slowly came to rest above your pussy, lifting up the hood of your clit while his ring finger made feather-light strokes against it. "Good, good.. we're gonna take our time tonight, understand?" He asked, stopping his hand until he got another needy 'mhm' from you. "Good girl."

⋆｡˚ ♡ Toji: makes you cum until you can't focus on being insecure

He's in the middle of tugging your panties off, kneeling between your legs while they're propped up on his shoulders.

When you quickly sat up and held his arm after he swiped your panties out under your foot, he was swift to stop and ask what was wrong. From seeing the fear in your eyes, he could almost think there was a monster in the room with you two, however silly that thought was. So you could imagine his initial confusion when you timidly asked if he really wanted to do this with you.

"Do I really wanna do this with you, huh?" He asked back, leaning his body weight down onto you as he stared into your unsure eyes with his own. "Am I sure I wanna eat your pussy? Make you get my face all messy with your cum? Is that what you're asking me?" His brash wording was making you get at a loss for words, staring up wide-eyed at him as he scoffed at his own questions.

Before you could backtrack on what you'd said, your body was suddenly effortlessly lifted up, your core now a hair's width from Toji's wide mouth. "I'll show you how much I want this, don't worry," was the only warning you'd gotten before he latched his lips down around your clit, sucking on it harshly while his hands were holding your legs spread open, knees resting on his shoulders as you let out loud moans from the rush of pleasure going through your body.

"T-Toji, ohmygod, please!-" you cried, your voice getting cut off by him pushing his mouth deeper onto your cunt, loud, obscene slurping being heard as he moved his tongue around, curling it just underneath your clit. His deep grunts sent vibrations through you, hips bucking up against his fat tongue as he inched it down inside of you. Moans and cries felt like they were being punched out of you from how Toji's mouth was pulling you apart at the seams, head shaking against your cunt as his nose ground down right above your clit.

The wet sounds of Toji eating your pussy mixed with your shaky and loud moaning made for an obscene ambiance of the bedroom, making your ears feel hot with embarrassment while Toji continued pulling whimpers and begs from your lips. "Tell me how good this feels, baby," He groaned, running his hot tongue up your cunt as you tried your best to obey his request. "F-fuckme, it feels so good To-ji, right there, yesyesyes," you mewled out, hands clambering around you to grab desperately at the sheets beneath you.

"Yeah, that's right, keep it up pretty girl. 'M not stopping anytime soon," Toji's smile held a sharp edge to it as he continued to shove his tongue against your sensitive pussy, holding your trembling thighs still as he thoroughly ate you out.

⋆｡˚ ♡ Sukuna: “shut up and lemme eat” Spreads you open and tells you everything hes gonna do to your pussy until youre begging him to touch you

Makes you hold your legs up to your chest while he's running his thumb up and down your slit

Sukuna bursts out laughing when you start to shy away at his touch, your voice hesitant when you speak about your worries. You're *nervous*? You had the King of Curses himself, between your legs, and you were nervous about him not liking this? The concept of that claim made him laugh until you looked away in embarrassment, face red.

He tsked at you, his thumbs coming to either lip of your pussy and pulling them apart. "Nah, don't look away from me," he spoke, his tone leaving no room for negotiation as you quickly looked back down at him. You whined at the feeling of being so exposed, lips pressing together at how close his mouth was to your cunt while he spoke to you.

That smile crossing Sukuna's face was enough to tell you that he had gotten an idea, one that would make you regret speaking out your concerns. "Yeah, you're right, maybe I'm not ready to eat you out yet." His eyes glimmered with joy at how your face morphed from confusion to upset in the blink of an eye. Before you could sputter out any apologies, he leaned closer toward you, keeping his eyes on yours before continuing. "I was gonna make you ruin your sheets too, what a shame you can't handle that."

You swallowed down a whimper at the visual your brain gave you at his words, watching him place his forearms onto the back of your thighs as he continued speaking. "I bet you'd be screaming my name too, I'd be fucking my tongue into you until you couldn't take it anymore." You couldn't hide the breathy moan that left your lips as the gears in your head turned, realizing what Sukuna had in mind. "Sukuna-" Your protests were cut off by the way his fingers crept closer towards your opening, waiting with bated breath on what he'd do next.

"Oh no, I understand, not all girls can handle it. You probably wouldn't want to get tongue fucked all night for your first time, right? And my fingers stroking your lil clit would be so much for you, too, we can't have that." Sukuna didn't stop with his barrage of dirty comments, his gravelly voice right above your pussy sending waves of arousal through you. You could practically feel everything he was describing, a surprised moan coming out when the tip of his thumb pushed against the soaked ring of your hole.

"So tight, too, you'd feel any little move I'd make. I bet you'd still feel tight even after I made you cream on my tongue, wouldn't you?" You moaned pitifully as the barest hint of stimulation was taken away, Sukuna's fingers returning to holding your lips open. "It's a good thing you stopped me before I started, thanks for warning me." The mocking sincerity of his tone made you throw your head back in frustration, whining out a plea as he looked up at you confusedly.

"What's the matter?" You weakly glared down at him, stifling another whimper as you throbbed yet again, pressure building up inside your core and making you ache desperately. "Aww, poor thing, you're so needy for me already. I bet it'd feel so much better if I touched you, yeah?" He asked, tongue lolling out in front of your cunt and making you whine hopelessly as you tried to grind your hips against it. A thin drop of saliva started to form at the tip of Sukuna's tongue, gathering and threatening to drip down onto your aching pussy before he slid it back inside his mouth.

"Ah ah, no whining, you chose this. Now, lemme tell you everything else I'm gonna do, won't you?" He chastised, feeling restlessness settle in your belly as you grumbled in defeat.

#jjk #jjk x reader #jujustu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x you #jjk smut #jjk fanfiction #gojo x reader #choso x reader #nanami x reader #sukuna x reader #toji x reader #geto x reader #choso kamo #geto suguru #gojo satoru #toji fushiguro #ryomen sukuna #nanami kento

[pokechbi]

Hi, I hope you’re doing well. Can you do a cockwarming with Ghost please. Maybe he’s doing paper work or something and reader just can’t stay away

Hi Anon! Thank you sooo much for the request! So sorry it took forever, these past couple of weeks have been insane! I hope you enjoy 💗💗

🎀Cockwarming Simon🎀

- Simon Ghost Riley x Fem Reader - 18+ NSFW, MINORS DNI! - WC: 1k

When Simon worked, he worked. Absolutely nothing could pull his nose out from those damn papers sprawled about his desk. When he caved himself in his office, absolutely nothing could distract him. If you weren’t bleeding or on fire, he’d continue scribbling away and pushing through his paperwork as if you didn’t exist. You never felt hurt though, because you knew his job as a lieutenant was demanding. You’d seen it first hand as his private. But that never stopped you from trying your absolute hardest to distract him. 

You were particularly bored and frustrated on this day. You’d cleaned the house from top to bottom, made dinner and tried busying yourself with watching TV. But nothing could take your mind off of the beast of a man upstairs who could satiate your thirst. It drove you insane. He was just up there, hiding away and hoarding that third leg of his that you couldn’t seem to get enough of. You lie on the couch, picking at your cuticles and biting the skin on your lips annoyedly. You grunt, sitting up. You didn’t know how you would do it, but you’d find a way to pull his focus from that damn work of his. He could spare some time for you, right? You knew it would be no easy feat. But you were determined. Hell bent on getting him to fuck you right there on his desk. 

You tip toe up the stairs, the pads of your feet sticking to the hardwood floor. You stifle a giggle as you creep past his office quietly. You enter your room, an idea lighting in your head. Why have I never thought of this? You think to yourself. You start with your pants and underwear, sliding them down your legs and stepping out of them. You then take the hem of your shirt, sliding it over your head and throwing it to the ground. The cold air on your breasts causes your nipples to perk up. Now completely naked, you make your way downstairs, quietly making a cup of coffee for Simon. You giggle and chuckle to yourself as you pour the hot water into the instant coffee, stirring it. You make your way up the stairs with the steaming mug in your hand, trying not to spill it on your skin. As you approach his office, you feel your heart rate rise and your fingers tremble. You open the door slowly, grateful that Simon never locked it when you were home. The embarrassment you would feel if he opened the door, seeing your naked body holding a cup of steaming coffee, was one you never wanted to experience,

“Simon, I brought you some coffee.” You say, the smile evident in your voice. You hold back a giggle, approaching him. You see him pause, keeping his head down on his work. You bite your lip as you approach him. You set the coffee down, away from his papers. You place your hand on his back, stroking his neck and running your nails up and down his scalp. He sighs, letting out a soft groan. He moves his head away from your hand, chuckling under his breath. 

“Don’t do that, love. Gotta get this work done.” He says, his voice stern. You don’t let up. You bend down, hugging him from behind. As your breasts make contact with the soft fabric of his shirt, you feel him tense under you. You smile, letting out a seductive chuckle. You kiss his head, running your fingers over his ears. You press your nipples into his back, wrapping your arms around his neck. He looks to the side, his eyes grazing over your naked body behind him. You smile at him, your eyes locking on his lips. He licks his lips nervously, the paperwork in front of him seemingly invisible now. 

“You fuckin’ minx.” He says, his voice now a breathless whisper. You yelp as he turns in his chair, wrapping his strong arms around your hips and pulling you onto his lap. He wastes no time in crashing his lips with yours, the taste of him swirling on your tongue. You moan into the kiss, feeling his cock grow hard under your bare ass. You wiggle in his grip, grinding against him. He groans, his lips parting as he grows harder under you. He reaches under you, unbuckling his jeans and sliding them down the slightest bit, still kissing you. He palms one of your breasts, taking a nipple in between his fingertips. He squeezes it, a jolt of electricity running through you. He continued kissing you hungrily, grunting and groaning everytime the swollen tip of his dick grazed against your bare skin. You move to straddle him, your feet hanging off the sides of the chair. The chair creaked and groaned under your weights as he shifted, lifting you up. 

“Since you wanna be so goddamn greedy, you’re gonna sit and wait for me to be done.” He says, the sternness of his voice causing a warmth to bubble in your clit. You feel a wetness accumulate between your legs, the yearning for him growing stronger by the second. You mewl as he lines himself with your entrance, pushing you down onto his cock. He doesn’t give you a second to adjust, fully bottoming out inside of you. You dip your head into the crook of his neck, bucking your hips forward. Your clit practically weeps for friction as you grind your sensitive bud of nerves against his pubic hair. 

“Fuck, lovie. So goddamn warm. So tight.” He whispers, adjusting himself. He leans forward, picking up his pen and clicking it open. You whine, looking back at his paperwork. “I told you. You’re gonna have to wait. Wanted to be greedy, huh?” He teases, smacking the sensitive skin of your ass with an open palm. You continue whining and moaning as he stays hard inside of you, your walls pulsing and weeping for any kind of movement. He holds you down with one hand, filling out his papers with the other. You relish in the feeling of his cock inside of you, keeping you on the edge with every slight movement. He chuckles at your neediness, shaking his head. 

“You just wait until I’m done here. You’re a dead woman.” Your heart speeds up at his words, knowing you got yourself into something that seemed to be more than you could ever handle.

#fanfic #cod mw #ghost mw2 #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley #ghost cod #ghost call of duty #simon ghost x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley headcanons #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x you #simon riley x you #simon riley smut #ghost mwii #ghost smut #simon riley x y/n #fem reader #cod fanfic #cod modern warfare #cod mw2 #cod smut #cod x reader #ghost headcanons #c0ckwarming #x reader #x fem reader

[brainfullofbees]

.

#it is amazing the impact a long night with friends can have on your mental state #genuinely feel better than i have in months #so very much appreciate the wonderful friend who kept checking in throughout the night to make sure i was still okay #cause people were drinking and i get anxiety around drugs and stuff #but it was fine! things didn't get crazy and it was mostly pretty chill #smimo made us burgers at three in the morning simply because he wanted to and it was very sweet #and also probably the best burger i've ever had holy shit #this is the latest i've stayed up in a while lol i usually go to bed between 9-11 ish #did end up getting a bit overstimulated and it felt like the lights were attacking my brain but! #they took me home pretty soon after and now i am cozy and warm in my dark room #and i am not being attacked by my own brain for once #and it's nice #it's really fuckin nice #can i just have this forever please?

[dead-girl-tells-stories]

Everyone from babies to young adults suddenly disappears from Amity Park, and the ghost portal self-destructs as well. The GIW and the Fentons obviously come to the conclusion that it’s ghosts but realize that this issue is way bigger than they can handle, so they call in the big guns, The Justice League.

Of course, they don’t tell the Justice League everything when they come. No matter how much they thought themselves to be heroes, they were simply glorified police in spandex. And with how they operate, they are all too small-minded and won’t be able to see the bigger picture. They also knew fully well that a lot of their methods weren’t even remotely close to being morally or ethically right, and if the JL found out, they would be screwed. So they simply told them enough to get them on their side. 

Besides, how could they not help with how many people were missing? This was going to be easy.

_______

The Justice League didn’t trust the GIW. Something about them was just off. But so many missing people were on the line, so many kids! 

Ghost?

Should they call in the JLD?

_______

Jason knew something was off with Crime Ally.

Nothing was wrong per se. In fact, everything was going great. Crime was at its lowest in like… forever. The general atmosphere was more calm, if not a bit chilly. He himself was calmer. And there were fewer kids on the streets. Which would have been a good thing if this wasn’t fuckin’ CRIME ALLY!

Jason’s been stressing himself out, trying to find out what was going on. He’s been searching up and down, talking to people left and right. No one was reporting anything amiss. Some even told him that they still saw the kids walking around, though not as often as before. And they also looked like they were being well taken care of.

He even saw and talked to some of the kids himself and it was the truth. 

But when he asked where they went, they only laughed and ran away from him. Shouting that he would know soon before they disappeared around the corner. At this point, he was sufficiently freaked out and was so close to getting Batman to contact the JLD, but something told him otherwise.

A few days later Jason was in bed. He had ended patrol early that night and intended to get a full eight hours if he could.

But as fate would have it, he would not. Because just before he could hit the hay he heard it. Well, felt it would be more accurate but how could you feel a siren’s song? Pulling you? Drawing you in. Telling you that it would give you your deepest desire.

He didn’t even bother to suit back up into Red Hood. He just followed it. Followed and followed, Until he got to a dead-end alleyway. But there was no ‘end’. All there was, was darkness. 

He began to get skeptical and took a few steps back. But the feeling was still there. Pulling, telling that all of his answers were in that darkness. Everything he wanted, needed, awaited beyond it. 

He did the stupid thing and went into the darkness.

He didn’t know what he was expecting, but it wasn’t the feeling of walking through thick goop. But the feeling didn’t last long, and he eventually stepped out.

Again, he didn’t know what he was expecting, but it wasn’t this. 

Kids running around without a care in the world, unrestricted. Teenagers just hanging out and being kids too. Whatever adults he saw all looked pretty young, but they were all happy. 

He looked around and noticed that it looked like a weird mix between a suburb and a night market, but it worked quite well. The stalls were all unmanned, and it seemed whoever could just take whatever they wanted. Dim but pretty lights connected all the stalls to as far as his eyes could see. And the sky.

In Gotham, there’s so much smog and bad weather you’d be lucky to even see a piece of blue during the day so no wonder people often forget about the night. But this, the night sky wherever he was, was beautiful, beyond what words and even thoughts could convey.

“Hello, Mr. Red Hood.”

Jason jumped. Was he so out of it that he didn’t even notice someone coming up behind-

Forget what he just said about the sky. The woman right here that was now standing before him? She- She-

“Are you single?”

There was silence. Then she giggled. Guess Jason didn’t need his helmet huh? His face was enough.

He also wanted to die again but hey, at least she laughed!

#dp x dc #dc x dp #dcxdp #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc prompt #dp dc crossover #dpxdc #another one? #wow im on a roll #the GIW were starting to kidnap and experiment on ghost and liminals as well #mostly kids #danny and the gang wasn't having it #so after talking with CW he found out he could use his newfound Ghost King authority and transport everyone to a safe place! #He did ask everyone's permission first tho #after negotiating with Lady Gotham he was allowed to have a subspace between normal Gotham and ghost Gotham #as long as he helped maintain the balance on both sides #this is a ploy between LG and CW to start teaching their King how to care for his people #both living and non living #did I mention #anger management

[flowersforvi]

— is this thing on? - video1.mov 𖦹

living with 3 roommates while being a camgirl was hard, so why not invite them on stream?

series masterlist

a/n; first stream out, what do you guys think? lmk! softdom!dina i love u forever :3

palestine masterlist, daily click, israeli themes in tlou

you pressed the ‘STREAM NOW’ button on your laptop not even 5 seconds ago, and the chat was already flooded with comments. some of them relating to you, or how you had dressed: in nothing but your underwear and a large t-shirt.

on the other hand, some had noticed the other figure next to you, dina, your roommate. dressed in a navy blue lingerie set, she looked absolutely stunning.

ilovewomen: you look so cute! excited for today ☺️

milffxcker69: oh???? have someone joining you ;)?

bewwwbiez: you two are so hot 🥵🤤

look, you didn’t expect her to actually be interested in joining you on stream, but after a night of drinks and kissing, you had gotten her approval to join.

so here you two are, kneeling next to eachother in front of the grainy laptop camera.

you had made your greetings, saying hello, letting everyone know someone was going to be joining you for once, unlike your usual solo streams.

dina didn’t hesitate when you gave her the okay to touch you, hands finding their way up your shirt, slithering past your stomach and directly to your tits.

“you’re gonna be good for me, baby? especially with all of these people watching, you wouldn’t wanna embarrass yourself, right?”

fuck, you were nervous. she immediately took the reins, and all you could do is nod, while letting out a little ‘mhn’.

“so fuckin’ cute. can you lay down for me baby? gonna eat your pretty pussy out.”

dina wasn’t shy about what she wanted, she never was, but now especially, nothing was going to get in her way. you leaned back onto your soft sheets, looking up at her with desperate eyes.

she moved her hands, delicately wrapping around your legs, slowly moving to your inner thighs. dina placed kisses so close to your clothed cunt, you bucked your hips up because you were just so fucking needy.

“oh i know— i know sweet girl, you’re doin’ so good for me. i promise i’ll give you what you want soon.”

soft lips pressed against the front of your pussy, tongue darting out to lick at your clit. you let out a gentle moan, something only dina and the several hundred people could hear, and the people weren’t shy to let you know how good you sounded.

milfinmyarea: she makes you feel so good i’m jelly :(

girlkisser41: umm?!?! this is so hot help.

carpetmuch69: me and who. me and who. 😭😭

“dina, ohmygod— please, dina do it properly.”

without hesitation, she pulled your panties to the side, licking a long stripe up your cunt. your only reaction was to bring your fingers into her hair, tugging her head closer and closer to you.

you were so desperate for her, continuing to move your hips as much as you could. she wanted you to cum just as much as you wanted to, and she made sure you would.

“gonna cum mama, hm? so fuckin’ cute.”

even if you wanted to hold back your orgasm, you couldn’t. dina was so sloppy and messy while eating you out, and looking down to see her was a sight.

you cum with her name on your lips, releasing her hair and grabbing the sheets below you. completely and utterly fucked out, she was so gentle with you after you came down from your high, brushing soft circles over your hips.

stream completely forgotten and out of your head, dina made the decision to end it. hovering over the ‘END STREAM’ button, she forgot to say goodbye to everyone watching.

“oh uh— bye guys! we hope you enjoyed the stream! see you next time.”

taglist; @syrenada @satellitespinner @mxlti-fand0m-imaginess @ellieslob @starlynnr @enhanct @elsbunny222 @marsworlddd @sapphiclesbli @ruelliee @antonellavanella @lasting-lover @desireesfics @marvelwomenarehot0 @daribakugo @elliessslut @letsreadsomesins-shallwe @elliew-illiamsmissingfingers @a-little-bit-of-everybody @aouiaa @fairydxll

#— itto? #— flowersforvi writes #dina x you #dina x fem reader #dina woodward #lesbian #wlw #tlou #dina the last of us #dina tlou #tlou smut

[l13]

♡ cod men and their nsfw visuals part 2 ♡

part 1 here

WARNINGS : NSFW, 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI, the links are literally p#rn, proceed at your own risk.

CHARACTERS : alejandro, gaz, keegan, ghost, soap, price, könig

alejandro vargas

♡ this man just doesn't give a single flying fuck. He's gonna control the pace, if he wants to, and that's a promise. Holding you by the back of your thighs and bouncing you on his cock is just one of his fave ways to do so- "Shit- such a wet fucking pussy you have, cariño" "Let me ruin it,"

♡ well. if you're gonna beg him so sweetly to fuck your face... that means you're ready for it right? Wrong. You'd never be ready for how this man face fucks even if you took monthly courses for it. The fact is, no matter how dirty, rough and down right sinful this man treats you when he's face fucking you- he'd gaze down at you softly each time he pulled out, "You good, baby?" grinning lazily as you assured him you were fine- tears running down your cheeks as you heaved, "You sure?"

♡ i am mentally not okay. "Stop crying, mi vida, we're not done yet."

kyle 'gaz' garrick

♡ think it's safe to say gaz seems like he'd enjoy anal don't you? LMAOOO "babe please can we try somethin'? I bet you'll love it." oh you loved it alright.

♡ sometimes kyle is just so desperate for you- he can't even wait till your clothes are off and he's situating you over his cock, grinding his hips up at you as you roll your own, and there's sweat dripping down his temple as you both get lost in the pleasure, "Shit- just like that," "Ffuck yeah, baby- you're so good t'me," he truly almost loses his mind at how good you feel even over all of your clothes

♡ if he's fingering you, gaz is taking his sweet time in doing so- he's soft and slow as he uses his fingers to rub your pussy- pressing needy kisses on your parted lips each time you moan, "You like this, babe?" "Want me to go slower?.. No? Y'want me to go faster?...Nah that doesn't sound right"

keegan russ

♡ what can i say he's a 'i'll paint your pussy with my cum and shove myself back inside immediately afterwards" kinda guy, gets the biggest ego boost each time he fucks you fr "Ah fuck- baby..." "Best fucking dick you ever had, isn't that right kid?"

♡ RAUDGDGHH i'm so sorry ill contain myself- basically he would gladly spend hours just in between your legs, teasing you, touching you over your underwear no matter how many times you beg him to hurry up and do smth already he just chuckles lowly, "Nah, I'd rather be doing this.." fucker has the biggest hard-on as well but just won't stop playing with your pussy

♡ no because- no becauuuse listen to me. LISTEN TO ME. I'M RIGHT. KEEGAN LOVES FUCKING TEASING YOU and he runs with it. "Pussy's so wet, doll.. Why's that, huh?" spits on your pussy for good measure and resumes sliding his cock over your puffy clit, "You fucking love this, I know you do,"

simon 'ghost' riley

♡ not even gonna say anything

♡ there's nothing in this world ghost loves more than when he gets you absolutely drunk on his cock, head thrown back, thanking him repeatedly as he thrusts inside you like there's no tomorrow-as he fucks you so well. "Fuckin' cum on me again, love. I know y'want to," "Ah fuck-Pussy's gripping me so tight, jus' let go and I promise I'll give you more, yeah?"

♡ not gonna say anything again HOLY SSSHIT. THIS IS SIMON AND YOU CANT TELL ME OTHERWISE. GOODBYE FOREVER. LOGGING OUT OF LIFE

john 'soap' mactavish

♡ john 'i want to engrave you and your body in my soul' mactavish. man just wants to worship you fr

♡ sometimes soap just wants to make you feel good, no matter how hard he is, no matter how much you tell him you don't have to- he wants to. Absolutely loves to rub your sweet cunt, making you come undone as many times as he can, and also loves how needy you get- pressing kisses all over his face, so thankful by how good he's treating you<3333

♡ y'know what- soap would definitely film smth just like this on his phone, and he'd just love watching it when he was away, groaning as he looks at your hot body on his phone, his fist not making him feel nearly as good as yours would. But he makes do, imagining that it's your hand that's holding his cock, your hand he's rutting up to as he moans, eyes rolling back. "Yeah, yeah just like that. Mmso fuckin good-baby fffuuuuck" God, he needed to see you.

john price

♡ tears in my eyes. tears in my fucking EYYYYESSSS. Price loves nothing better than coming home after a long ass day, and just make you come over and over and over, whispering praises on your ear, his cock twitching in his briefs each time you jump and try to escape his hold, too overstimulated to form words- and this asshole just chuckles, "Stay right where you are, or I won't fuckin' stop till you're cryin' for me to put my cock inside you."

♡ price is a patient man unless he's pushed to his limits. Now, imagine he's trying to sleep after the most gut wrenching day he's had this week, and his brain just not shutting the fuck up to let him sleep. What better way to get over his insomnia than to wake you up and fuck you till he's pussy drunk? At least then he'll go to sleep thinking of you. "S' good, darling" "pussy's s' fuckin' good for me, innit?" "So good lettin' me use you like this, honey.."

♡ in the rare occassion that john fucks you doggy style, you stay down like a good pup. Or else.

könig

♡ Even König gets mad sometimes. And yeah, he does get mad when you openly show affection to someone that isn't him. And he was this close to bash ghost's face in if you hadn't pulled him aside, clueless eyes staring up at his now cold ones. "Who's fucking you now, hm?" "Can he fuck you like this?" (he prob can but yknow) "Maybe I should invite him to watch how dumb my sweet liebling gets on my cock."

♡ yup. yup yup yup.

♡ könig will cum so fucking hard just by rubbing his cock on your pussy, head tilted to the side and brows pulled together as he pants, eyes never leaving the movement of your hand as you rub his dick back and forth on your cunt-

no thoughts head empty just cod men.

#cod smut #cod x reader #cod mw2 smut #cod mw2 x reader #mw2 x reader #mw2 smut #cod visuals #mw2 visuals #john price x reader #john price smut #price x reader #price smut #simon riley x reader #simon riley smut #ghost x reader #ghost x reader smut #ghost smut #soap x reader #soap x reader smut #john mactavish x reader #john mactavish x reader smut #john mactavish smut #konig x reader #konig x reader smut #alejandro vargas x reader #keegan russ x reader #kyle garrick x reader #gaz x reader #gaz x reader smut #keegan russ smut

[lovelettersfromluna]

͙⁺˚*･༓☾　Sink my teeth in you　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

{Ellie Williams x Reader}

Summary: One stupid dare had changed Ellie’s life forever, and the person she cared about the most was suffering because of it.

an: Shes baaaackk!! The amount of feedback you guys gave me for Still Alive had my jaw on the floor, so here’s part two! This will most likely be the last part of the Still Alive story that I’ll be doing, but if you guys do want more of angsty, hot, demon Ellie, please let me know. I also changed my format a little bit, so let me know if you guys prefer this or how I was writing before. I hope you all enjoy this one as much as you enjoyed the last. (Also this one isn’t proofread either sorryyyy)

Warnings: smut! Will be a lot softer and more loving than last time but still…smut. Mentions of blood (don’t worry I don’t get too graphic I can’t handle that shit either), Ellie smoking because bby is stressed and having an identity crisis, angst, use of strap (r!receiving), pet names, shy!reader standing up for herself, Ellie is shamelessly in love with reader, mentions of…spells and rituals?? It’s mainly from memory of Jennifers body and things im making up myself, let me know if I missed anything pleaseee.

You can read part 1 here!

Ellie Williams was fucking dead.

At least she was pretty sure she was dead, she truly couldn’t tell. She felt…different, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t put her finger on what had changed. She was so out of tune with herself, and her thoughts and her actions, it was like she was standing behind a wall while someone else controlled her, and it was fucking scary.

She did know however, that she sure as hell wasn’t human anymore.

It was fucking ridiculous, and she felt like she was losing her mind, but she was pretty sure she knew how this all happened.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

It was her typical Friday night, hopping from bar to bar with a group of her party friends. They were drinking too much, smoking too much, and she felt herself slowly slipping away from reality with each sip of her drink that she took. She fucking needed it, classes were kicking her ass, and her grades were dropping..

And it was becoming harder and harder to pretend like she wasn’t in love with you.

It was fucking pathetic, because you’ve been her best friend since you guys were like…8 years old, and she’s always felt butterflies whenever she was around you. But she let it go on too far, her feelings settling in the pit of her stomach every time you laid your head on her shoulder, or held her hand whenever you were nervous, and before she knew it she wasn’t 8 years old with a crush anymore, she was well into her 20s and falling in love.

She hated it because she felt selfish, she felt like she was taking advantage of your kindness, of your friendship.

So, she went out with her friends and she got drunk, as one does when they’re hopelessly in love with their best friend.

She was following behind her group of friends, already visiting the fourth bar of the night, and Ellie was mindlessly staring at her shoes hitting the ground, her fists balled up in her pockets, images of your pretty face flashing through her head, when Dina spoke up.

“Let’s go into this one! I think there’s a live band here tonight” She gasped, squinting her eyes as she tried to read the horribly written sign outside. Ellie frowned softly as she tried to as well, leaning in a bit to get a better look at what it said.

Live performance tonight! Violet Skies!

Ellie furrowed her eyebrows as she read, blinking a few times before she sighed, noticing that her friends were already stumbling into the bar without any further questions. “Corny fuckin’ band name…” she mumbled our, taking one more look at the sketchy looking bar before she walked in.

Whoever the hell it was, sure as hell wasn’t popular. The bar had ten people max, and most of them were already too belligerent to even comprehend that there was a live performance. She sighed, making her way to the bar and ordering herself a glass of whiskey.

Her friends were crowded near the stage, creating some what of a make shift audience for the band that would be playing soon. Ellie was miserable, she was getting to a point where she wasn’t even having fun anymore.

She just wanted you, in your comfy little home with your comfy blankets and your sweet smelling lotion that you wore every night. She wondered time and time again why she chose a cold, empty bar over your warm inviting home and even warmer embrace.

She was a coward, that’s why.

She was more than half way done with her drink far too quickly, when the band began to set up for their show. She turned her attention towards them, squinting her drunk eyes a bit as she watched them all tune their instruments and adjust the microphone.

Before she could even realize what was happening, she was being tugged throughout the bar by her arm, by Dina. Ellie let out an annoyed groan, letting the girl drag her around like a rag doll. Once Dina had brought her with the rest of the group in front of the stage, Dina gave her a gentle nudge. “M’not letting you sit at the bar all night like a creep…maybe these guys are good!” She beamed, causing Ellie to roll her eyes gently.

Dina smirked gently as she leaned into her a bit, her voice dropping. “I caught a glimpse of the lead singer…she’s hot”. Dina’s words made Ellie scoff, because Dina knew that she was sulking over you right now. And there wasn’t even any reason to, Ellie was simply the queen of self sabotage.

Ellie opened her mouth to complain, but before she could, the show was starting.

The bright lights that settled onto the stage hurt Ellie’s head, and they weren’t even directed at her. She was just fucking annoyed and she wanted to leave but she also didn’t know where to go because she couldn’t escape her fucking thoughts. And now this godforsaken band was walking on stage and she couldn’t care less and..

Her breath gets caught in her throat, because Dina was right. The lead singer is hot.

Because she reminds Ellie of you.

If she didn’t know any better, she’d think this girl modeled her entire appearance after you. She’s got the same pretty hair color as you, and the corner of her lips turn up the same way yours do when you’ve got that cute little smirk on, and it’s making Ellie feel warm inside because she’s bringing her the same comfort that you bring. Ellie finds that she can’t take her eyes off of her.

The band sucks, and they’re out of tune and the songs are cheesy and it sounds like radio music, but Ellie doesn’t fucking care, because you’re literal twin is standing in front of her on a stage, swaying her hips in a tiny skirt, and she’s too drunk to apply any common sense she has in that moment. She pretends it’s you on stage, putting a show on for her.

It doesn’t help that she’s eye fucking Ellie the entire time.

It burns her because she wonders what you’d look like if you looked at her that way, not some carbon copy, but you, her best friend, her girl. She’s licking her lips, her eyes burning from a lacking of blinking as she stares at your clone, and in that moment she feels like this is the closest she’ll ever fucking get to the real thing.

Dina notices immediately, and she smirks gently. She’s just as drunk as Ellie, and her better judgment has flown out the window far too long ago, so she doesn’t stop herself when she leans into Ellie again towards the end of the set and whispers to her.

“I dare you to try and get it in with her”

Ellie truly didn’t need to be told twice, because adrenaline was already pumping through her veins and she was fucking horny, and she seriously had nothing to lose at this point.

Or so she thought.

She smirked softly as she eyed the lead singer, downing the rest of what was in her glass and passing it to Dina.

The bands set had ended a few minutes after that, and the little smirk that the lead singer gave Ellie, followed by the silent calling with her fingers when she walked off was all she needed to carry out the dare that she was given.

The bar was small, with little security, so it was fairly easy to navigate her way to the backstage area. She made her way out of the bar, the warm breeze wafting onto her face as she circled around the bar so that she was at the back of it.

And as if they shared a brain, there she was. She looked even more like you in the moonlight, and it made Ellie’s heart beat faster. Her back was pressed up against the brick wall of the bar as she brought her cigarette to her lips, smirking the second she saw Ellie making her way over to her.

“Didn’t think you’d come…” She purred out, trying desperately to sound sexy. If Ellie wasn’t so gone, the attempt would’ve made her cringe. But the alcohol and weed in her system made it so that she even sounded like you, so she took it.

Ellie smirked softly, leaning against the wall as she stood next to the girl, her bottom lip pulled between her teeth as her eyes shamelessly roamed down her body. “With that little show you were putting on for me? I’d be crazy not to come…” she sighed out, her voice raspy.

The girl giggled softly, her cheeks turning pink as she turned her body so that she was facing Ellie before she nodded her head towards the building. “Wanna see my dressing room?” 

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

Ellie had the girl pressed up against the dark walls of the dressing room, if she could even call it that. It was a small room with a couch against the wall, a make shift vanity and a tiny rack with a few hangers on it, but Ellie didn’t care.

Because in her drunken state, a pair of soft lips and a warm body pressed up against hers was just what she needed. The little moans and whines that came from the girl were urging her on, and it was finally giving her the distraction from you that she needed so badly.

“Fuck…you taste so good..” she moaned out. Ellie knew she was lying, she tasted of weed and whiskey and her kisses were harsh. It made Ellie wonder how many times she’d told someone these things before.

Ellie groaned, gripping the girls waist and walking backwards until they had reached the couch. The girl pressed her palms against Ellie’s chest, pushing her back to lay on the couch as she straddled her.

Without missing another beat, her lips were on Ellie’s again. Ellie placed her large hands on her hips as she began rocking her back and forth, letting her grind down on her body. The moans that she let out were sinful and Ellie wanted more, she needed to hear more.

When the girl broke the kiss, she expected her to take her top off, or stand up to take her skirt off, or anything other than what she actually did.

She was straddling Ellie, and Ellie moaned out softly as she let her hand trail up her body, grabbing and squeezing as she waited for her to do something else. The girl opened her mouth and she began speaking, but Ellie couldn’t understand what she was saying.

Her words sounded like they were in a different language, one Ellie couldn’t quite pinpoint, and it made her furrow her eyebrows in confusion. She sat up a bit, proving herself up on her elbows as she stared up at the girl. “What…what are you doing?” She mumbled out, but she was only met with a hand pressed to her chest and pushing her back down to lay on the couch.

The girl continued speaking, reaching behind her and grabbing a small dagger, and Ellie’s heart began beating faster and faster.

The girl got louder with each passing word she spoke, and Ellie was starting to think for a moment that this was all a bad dream and she’d wake up soon.

But she never did.

The girl inhaled deeply, holding the handle of the dagger with both hands before she lifted it over her head, biting her lip almost nervously as she stared down at Ellie.

“We won’t make it on our own in Hollywood…you’re our ticket there…sorry” she mumbled softly, and Ellie’s eyes went wide.

“Are you fucking crazy!? What are you-“ her words were cut off by the dagger piercing her through her chest.

She doesn’t remember anything after that.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

That night was the last normal night of Ellie’s life.

Because after all of that, she woke up gasping for air in the woods. She had no idea where the fuck she was or how long she had been there, but she did know that whoever the hell put here there, thought that she was dead.

When she got up, she had the worst headache of her entire fucking life. The throbbing was so loud, she was sure if anyone was standing next to her they’d be able to hear it too. And she was so fucking hungry. She placed a hand on her stomach to try and calm the pain she felt, but it didn’t help.

She felt empty, drained, like all of the life had been sucked from her body, and she was merely a corpse left to rot in the woods.

Corpse…death…dying.

That girl tried to fucking kill her.

It was all coming back to her, but when she looked down at the area of where the girl had stabbed her, it was completely gone.

And Ellie was sure she was having a bad fucking trip at that point.

All she knew, was that she needed to get home and fucking eat something.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

It was like she was suffering the worst hangover of her entire life.

No matter how much she ate, she couldn’t shake the empty feeling that settled at the pit of her stomach. She tried everything, cleaning out her fridge, her pantry, she even splurged and bought food from her favorite fucking take out place.

And nothing.

She felt like she was going to pass out every time she stood up. She was weak, and frail, and there wasn’t enough medicine to get rid of the pain that riddled her entire body.

And to make things worse, she couldn’t stop thinking about you.

She always did, you were almost always on her mind, but this was all different.

The hunger she felt in her stomach was almost identical to the hunger she felt for you. It was like she couldn’t separate lust and basic human needs, and she felt like she was going to lose her mind if she wasn’t able to touch you soon.

But she couldn’t, not in this state. She had to wait to see you.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

Ellie learned a lot within the week that she took off of school.

She learned that food wasn’t enough. After about the third day of trying to satisfy herself with the second set of groceries she went through, she was convinced that food just was not going to cut it.

Then what the hell would?

Her answer came to her when she was at the store, trying to buy more medicine for her everlasting headache.

The fluorescent lights in the pharmacy were making her dizzy, everything around her just entirely too loud, and it was making her angry.

But for a moment, it was all clear.

The girl standing next to Ellie was so unsuspecting, bending down a bit to find whatever medicine it was that she needed, living her life just as everyone else was doing in the store.

But Ellie couldn’t ignore the way that her mind was clear, and for a split second, her headache was gone and the hunger she felt subsided.

Until it all came rushing back again once she stepped away.

She wasn’t sure what it was that ignited her to follow the girl, or what it was that was even prompting her to continue doing so outside of the store. But before she knew it, her new instincts were taking over and she was pouncing the girl outside of her car in the dim parking lot.

So yeah, Ellie finally figured out what it was that she needed to satisfy her hunger.

Because after she finished the girl, she felt stronger, like she had been born again. Any pain and suffering that she was experiencing had disappeared the second her teeth sunk into the girls skin. It was like euphoria, and she wanted more.

That week was spent entirely by herself. Researching and trying to understand what the hell had happened to her. She figured she wasn’t a vampire, because she’d watch those twilight movies with you and she was pretty damn sure she wouldn’t turn into stone if someone killed her, and she was breathing and walking around just as much as any other living person so she wasn’t necessarily dead.

But she was stronger, radiant, she was sure her skin even had a new fucking glow to it that wasn’t there before. So something had changed.

After digging through countless libraries, she finally found a book on spells and rituals. That’s how she settled on the fact that she indeed was used as a sacrifice.

A fame spell to be exact. Ellie couldn’t decipher what spell it was exactly that had been used on her, but from what was physically done, and the final words that the girl spoke to her, she narrowed it down to that.

Dealing with…her new way of life was..strange.

Because her strength would last for a few days after she…ate, and she would feel like she was on top of the world. But then, she’d crash.

After reading further, she figured out that she had to feed every other day now. She tried her best to put it off as much as she possibly could, but Jesus was it hard.

The books she had about the spells and rituals also told her, that her hunger could only be satisfied when in the presence of her true love, and that made Ellie’s cold, dead her skip a beat.

Because she knew it was you, and she knew that she needed a lot of time before she could face you again. The hunger for you was still there, no matter how much she fed on others, she only wanted to be with you, and that scared her.

Ellie wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she ever hurt you.

And that’s why she waited so long to see you, wanting to be at her strongest before she was setting foot in your home and into your embrace. She told herself she could do it, that it would all be easy.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

She was wrong.

Because come Monday and you’re sitting in the courtyard, the sun dancing on your pretty skin, soaking it up beautiful, your skirt flowing in the wind, and Ellie just wants to whisk you away and keep you in her bed until the end of time.

But she gets closer and she notices that you’re sitting with Amber.

It was stupid enough that Ellie had gone too many days without feeding, and she was already irritated to begin with, but now you were sitting there looking like a fucking goddess and it wasn’t for her, you weren’t waiting for her and it made her want to rip someone’s fucking throat to shreds.

Ellie finds that she can’t really control herself or her actions these days, especially when it’s been a while since she’s gone…hunting..it’s like she’s suddenly seeing red at any minor inconvenience and she’s too weak to even care about the white hot rage that’s surging through her body.

And that’s how you end up crying in front of her in the library, and Ellie feels like fucking shit about it.

Once her head is clear and she isn’t tucking starving, shes texting you and she’s trying to apologize but it’s all left in vain, because she’s sure at this point you’ve either muted her messages or gone all out and blocked her, and it’s making her want to cry because don’t you know that you’re all she fucking wants? Can’t you see how she feels about you? She’s suffering without you and it seems like you don’t even fucking care.

Ellie finds herself getting upset again, and the worst part is, is that you aren’t even there to defend yourself.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

It had been a few days since the party, and Ellie was once again suffering.

You’d gone completely silent after it all. You gently pushed her off of your body, put your clothes on and walked out of the room to go home.

Ellie had sat there with a confused look on her face, scurrying around to grab her own clothes as she kept trying to talk to you, see what was going through your head, anything.

But you said nothing, you simply got dressed and left, and it left Ellie panicking.

Because she felt as though she just got you back, and she finally felt okay with herself and with you when she was around you, kissing you and holding you. But you were slipping through her fingers just as quickly as you were falling into bed with her, and she didn’t know what to do.

So, she gave you space.

She ignored any impulse that she had to text you, to show up at your apartment with your favorite flowers and a stuffed animal of the stupid cartoon you like, but it was fucking hard, and she couldn’t help but feel like this was the end between the two of you.

She started taking things a lot more serious when you didn’t show up to school.

Never in all of your friendship did you let anything make you miss school. Even when you were 11 and Ellie gave you strep and you almost passed out during gym class, or when you refused to miss a final even after a dentist appointment and you were all loopy on laughing gas, to this day Ellie doesn’t know how you passed a test in that state.

But bottom line was, you never let anything get in the way of your education. So Ellie was really fucking worried when her first lecture of the day was going on and all she could focus on was your empty seat that was next to her.

After class, she had raced to your apartment. She had given you more than enough time to figure out what you wanted from her, and she decided it was time you let her know.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

Her hand was banging on your door, the same exact way it was the first time she revealed herself to you after she had…changed.

She knew she had to be persistent, she knew that the sudden silence from you was only going to grow more space between the two of you if she didn’t do something about it.

So she stood there for about ten minutes, knocking on your door and calling out for you until you’d decide to call the cops, or open up for her.

“Baby come on…we…fuck, we need to talk. Either you let me in or I’m letting myself in” her tone was stern, and from the other side of it you stood there, staring at it, and you knew you should take her seriously.

Ellie almost passed out when she catches sight of you, and it feels like she hasn’t seen you in years. Your eyes are puffy, and your lips are swollen from all the times you’d rub your sweater sleeve against your nose, and as sick and twisted as it may sound.

Ellie thinks you look so fucking pretty.

But she can’t ignore the way her heart tugs at the tiny sniffle you let out. You’re standing in front of her, and you have that cute little pout on your lips, and your arms are wrapped around yourself like you’re protecting yourself from her and she feels like she’ll break at any second because this is her doing, she’s the reason you’re like this.

She let out a soft sigh and she’s pushing the door closed before she’s pulling you down to sit on the couch to sit with her. She winces slightly because you still won’t look at her, and she feels like she’s already lost you.

Her voice falls lower, just above a whisper as she brings her hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Bambi…you’ve gotta talk to me…we…we can’t just…do what we did and not talk about it”

She feels like the worst person in the world because the second she speaks, she can already see your chin wobbling and she hears the way your breathing becomes uneven and she knows it’s coming, and she wishes she can do something to stop it.

When you finally look up at her, your eyes are red, eyelashes clumping together from your wet tears and it looks like you’ll crumble at any second.

“You’ve changed Ellie…you’re not the same and I…I want my best friend back”

Your words hit her deep within her chest, like the dagger the girl at the bar drove through her, but worse. Because you’re pleading with her for something she can’t give you, and it’s the first time in her life and in your friendship that she feels like she can’t provide you with everything you’ll ever need.

She inhales deeply, her hands dropping to take yours in her own before she gives a slight nod. “I have changed…and I…I’m not sure if I can go back to the way I was before baby..” her voice is low, and her words make you scoff.

“Typical, you’re just dancing around my words at this point Ellie. What is going on with you? What are you not telling me?” You whimper out, your voice breaking between the sobs and tears you’re holding back for your own sake, and her own.

She sighs, because she knows she can’t keep this up anymore.

With a deep inhale, she give your hand a squeeze, and she’s telling you everything she’s experienced within the past few weeks.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

You’re slowly pulling your hands away from hers when she finishes, eyebrows furrowed as you stare at her as if she had three heads.

“Is this a fucking joke?”

Ellie felt like she was going to cry, and you were staring at her with furrowed eyebrows, looking so fucking angry. For the first time since all of this had happened, she realized that everything she was telling you probably sounded like a load of bullshit.

“Look, I know it’s hard to believe and…and I know you probably don’t trust me all that much right now. But I don’t even fully understand it all myself I just…” she stuttered out, feeling more and more hopeless the longer you stared at her with that dumbfounded look on your face.

Your best friend was sat in front of you, telling you that within the past two and a half weeks, she had someone been used in some…fame ritual, and because it went wrong, she was now some…some monster.

You let out a tired sigh, you were over it, all of it. You didn’t know what to think or what to feel, and in all honesty, you felt like the stories that Ellie were feeding you were all a sorry excuse to get rid of you.

“Look Ellie, I’m not an idiot…okay? And I’m not a child..if you…if you don’t wanna be friends anymore you can just say that. You don’t have to make up some elaborate story to try and soften the blow” you sighed out, your voice barely above a whisper. You slowly got up, letting her hands fall from your lap as you made your way to your bedroom, leaving her behind.

Ellie panicked, the tone in your voice told her that you were tired, and you were over her. The fact alone that you thought she could ever end your friendship made her heart tug.

The only reason she’d ever do that, is if she ever grew the balls to tell you how much she loved you.

She quickly got up from the couch and followed you into your bedroom. You were laying there, cuddling with Angel as you turned on your TV, acting as if Ellie wasn’t even there.

Ellie frowned, crawling onto your bed grabbing your thigh gently so she could spread your legs, settling between them as she stared into your eyes desperately.

“Im not lying! I wish I was fucking lying but I promise you I’m not” she groaned, grabbing your hand and holding it against her chest. “What can I do to prove it to you?” She mumbled out, staring into your sad eyes.

Angel caught her attention, and she noticed the way the cat that was curled into your side stared at her, eyes slanted and hair puffed up.

And it gave her an idea.

Her eyes widened a bit before she pointed at the cat. “Angel! She used to love me, and now she won’t even step near me. Don’t you think that means something?” She pleaded.

You frowned softly as you looked down at your cat, realizing then just how strange she had been acting.

Angel loved Ellie, she actually went with you to the adoption center to get her when she was just a baby. She crawled towards the both of you, meowing happily the second Ellie brought her hand down to pet her, and you knew that she was the one you’d take home with you.

Even when Ellie would visit, she’d be eager to jump into the girls lap.

But that had all gone through the window, and you started to think about when she started acting this way, but you were only left with the night that Ellie had came to you after her disappearance.

You blinked a few times in thought as you stared at your spooked cat before you shook your head, looking back up at Ellie.

“That doesn’t prove anything, she could just be…going through a phase or something” you shrugged, and Ellie was letting out a frustrated groan.

She looked down at her body, trying to find anything that she could physically show you that would prove to you that she wasn’t lying, and that this was all the truth.

Then she remembered. Her fucking fangs.

They freaked her out when she first realized she had them, and the sort of weighed in on the whole vampire theory that she had at first, but she remembered that she had them.

And that was all the proof she could give, so it had to be enough.

She inhaled deeply, staring down at you before she rested a hand on your soft thigh. “I’m going to show you something, but I need you to know that I’m not going to hurt you, and you don’t need to be afraid of me…okay?” She nodded slowly, trying to get you to understand that she was serious with what she was.

You furrowed your eyebrows as you stared up at her from your spot against your plush pillows, rolling your eyes as you shook your head. “Ellie I don’t have time for this, and really tired. Maybe you should just-“ she quickly cut you off.

“You know my better than anyone else does…please…just give me five minutes” she begged, her big green eyes staring into yours.

Your heart skipped a bit as she stared down at you, and you felt like you had no choice but to hear her out. You inhaled deeply before you gave her a gentle nod, urging her to carry on with what it was she had to show you.

She nodded with you, sighing gently before she closed her eyes, and focused. She had only tried pushing them out on her own once, the times before that her body simply took over and did it for her. She found that she had to make her mind completely blank, only focusing on bringing the new set of teeth that she had down.

Soon enough, her gums began to feel sore, and she felt her teeth shift a bit as the sharp fangs pushed out and settled where her canines would be. Once she was sure they were down completely, she opened her mouth for you to see.

Your eyes widened as you stared at her, sitting up a bit to get a closer look. The memories of her on top of you came flooding in, and what you wrote off to be a drunken hallucination was sitting right in front of your sober eyes.

Ellie Williams had fucking fangs.

You couldn’t stop yourself from crawling closer to her, settling on your knees as you reached out and grasped her chin gently, a soft gasp leaving your lips as you stared into your friends mouth.

“They were real…” you whispered out, more so to yourself than to her. Ellie furrowed her eyebrows in confusion at your words, letting you stare into her mouth for a moment longer before she grabbed your wrist and closed her mouth. “Wait, you saw them?”

You nodded slowly as you stared at her. “At the party..when you…when we finished…I saw them. But I just…assumed I was just seeing things because of how drunk I was” you mumbled out softly before you licked your lips, staring down at her hand wrapped around your wrist.

“Okay fine…so what if you are telling the truth. What does this all even mean? What are you trying to tell me?” You sighed out, your voice soft and tired.

Ellie sighed, her thumb rubbing your soft skin gently before she shrugged. “I’m not totally sure what it means…but I do know that I feel…I feel better when I’m with you…I feel normal, like I don’t even need to do any of that stuff to feel okay…” she sighed out, staring up at you. Her green eyes sparkled against the dark light in your room, and the sight alone had you in shambles.

She sighed out gently, her hands cautiously going to hold your waist gently before she continued on.

“I’m tired of pretending..I know I’m different now but I…..I…” she stuttered, her heart beating a mile a minute. She was scared, scared that she’d lose you forever.

But it was worth the fucking risk.

“I’m in love with you.” She confessed, her voice low as she stared up at you, hands massaging your waist gently as you stared down at her.

And you realized there were two things you had thought you imagined, but were real.

One, your best friend had fangs.

Two, she told you she was in love with you.

You froze, because you didn’t know what to say. In all the years of knowing her, you’d dream about being with her in this very moment, wishing she’d utter those words to you every night before you went to sleep.

But now that you were here, you didn’t know what to say.

Ellie continued massaging your skin, giving you as much time as you needed to respond to her. When a few seconds passed and you were still silent, she continue giving your waist small, reassuring squeezes.

“Don’t worry if you don’t feel the same way Bambi, we can still be friends-“ she was cut off by your lips pressed against hers.

Ellie groans softly, her eyes fluttering shut at the feeling. She has yearned for it the moment you broke apart the last time she was with you, and having you there with her, pressed up against her, it was like having her air fill up with lungs again.

You moved to straddle her lap, your tongue pushing into her mouth in a passionate kiss as you wrapped your arms around her neck and held her close to your body.

Ellie feels the best when she’s pressed up against you, but you haven’t said a word since she’s confessed, and she can’t let this carry on if you don’t feel the same way.

It takes everything in her to pull away from you, and the little whine you let out when she breaks the kiss doesn’t make it any easier, but she’s pulling you away by your waist and she’s staring up at you, trying to catch her breath.

“Baby…baby wait I…I can’t…I can’t keep going if you don’t feel the same way..” she breaths out, and she thinks you’re going to come to your senses and tell her to go home, that you were done with her nonsense

But you’re not, your smiling softly down at her and she swears she can see the hearts floating around in your eyes. They’re twinkling and glowing and they look like pools of love and you honestly don’t even have to say it back, but she’s desperate to hear those words fall from your lips.

“You’re such an idiot…of course I love you too Els…always have…” you whispered out, toying with the soft ends of her hair at the nape of her neck.

You hum softly, one of your hands coming from around her and tracing her features, dancing over her freckles as if they were tiny constellations, there just for your viewing and no one else.

“I…we need to talk more about…what happened to you…but I believe you” you nodded, affirming to her that you truly did believe her.

And she feels her heart beating out of her chest, because not only do you believe her, but you loved her, and she feels like it’s all she needs to keep her going for the rest of her days.

She’s nodding eagerly, pulling you closer as she agrees. “Anything, I’ll tell you anything you want. I promise” her words were genuine, and you’re smiling softly as you stare down at her, feeling so comfortable and at peace in her lap, with her arms wrapped around you, you can’t even think for another minute that the story she’s telling you is far fetched.

You nod with her before leaning in and pressing a kiss to the corner of her lips. “Before we do that…I’ve missed you, Ellie..” you sigh out against her ear, and she feels a chill run up her spine. Her hands are roaming your body in an instant and she’s nodding eagerly, almost looking silly as she gently lays you down into your bed.

“Fuck…please…let me show you how much I love you baby…come here…” she moaned out, already far too eager to touch you, feel you, love you.

You whine softly underneath her, staring up into her eyes lovingly before she leans down, catching your lips against hers in a loving kiss. Her hands are traveling up your body, slipping under your shirt and cupping your boob, twisting your nipple between her calloused fingers, and it’s pathetic but you’re already a moaning mess.

Her other hand comes up to grab both of your wrists, pinning them above your head. She breaks the kiss, staring down at you and moaning softly, she sounds so pretty you think you could cry. Your last memory with her like this was so fuzzy, and rough and hard to see through.

But this is all crystal clear, and it’s making your heart burst with love. The way she’s staring down at your body as she pushes your sleep shirt up to get a good look at you is so intense it almost makes you shy away, but this is Ellie, your Ellie, and you don’t trust anyone as much as you trust her.

Ellie bit her lip softly as she stares down at you for a moment longer before she’s helping you sit up, tearing off both your clothes and her clothes and tossing them in different directions of your room until your both naked and pressed up against one another.

You feel something press up against your soaked core and you furrow your eyebrows as you look down, only to see Ellie’s pink strap pushing against you. You look up at her, opening your mouth to ask her about it before she’s cutting you off with an answer.

“I…was hoping I’d be able to make love to you tonight…wore it just in case you didn’t kick me out…” she mumbles out sheepishly. And once again, your heart is bursting with love with her because she’s such an idiot sometimes, but it’s okay because she’s your idiot.

You pull her closer, pressing your lips to hers before your hand is trailing down between you and you grab the base, pushing it towards your soaked entrance with a soft hum.

“Shut up and fuck me already..” you moan out, and she doesn’t need to be told twice.

She pushes into you, and the moan you let out is enough to have her moaning with you. Her tattooed hand comes down to grip your hip gently as she steadies herself before she falls into a slow rhythm, moaning at the way her strap is rubbing up against her clit, and at the way that you’re moaning beneath her.

“F-fuck! Ahhhh Ellieeee…mmm-oh my god!” You whine out, and she’s nodding her head to urge you on further, her own words cut off by her moans and hissing.

“That’s it…that’s my fucking girl…o-oh fuck! My good girl…god I love you…fuck” she’s just as much of a mess as you are, and she’s positive she won’t last long. You’re staring up at her with those big heart eyes and she knows she’s a goner.

Because this is what she’s always wanted, to make you hers, show you how much she loves you and that you were it for her, you were her endgame, forever and always.

Her eyes are hungry and they’re eating you up, because you look like a work of art to her right now and she doesn’t even want to blink in fear that she’ll miss a fucking second of you.

“Love you so much…mmm fuuuuckk…gonna cum Els..please…please make me cum” you’re begging her, and it’s making her moans grow louder, the two of you babbling incoherently as you both confess your undying love for one another.

Ellie nods, speeding up her pace. “That’s it baby, such a good girl for me- fuck! I’m gonna fucking come. Oh my god I’m-“ she moans out, and just from the look of her throwing her head back, her fucking fangs on full display for you, looking like the prettiest goddamn demon you’ve ever seen, you cum with her.

There’s little sparkles dancing around you, at least that’s what it feels like. Ellie tossed her strap to the side once you both caught your breath and cleaned you both up, and she put you in your favorite sleep shirt, and a pair of spare boxers you had for her laying around, and you both simply lay there, holding each other in your dim room.

And it feels complete, because it’s the first time that you can actually feel her there with you, and not just pretending to be there. And Ellie feels it too, she feels satisfied and she feels like she’s normal again, even though she knows she’s not.

A few moments pass as you’re pressed up against her, your fingers tracing small shapes on her collar bone before you break the silence.

“So…are we talking like…resident evil vampires? Or…Edward Cullen vampire?” And your words makes her chuckle softly before she sighs, finally giving it some thought for a moment before she hum.

“We’ll find out together baby…”

#ellie williams #ellie williams smut #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams x you #tlou part 2 #ellie x y/n #ellie tlou #ellie x fem reader #ellie the last of us

[ggrapeejuicee]

Millionaire!Harry AU

cw: smut, daddy kink, slight degredation

You’d known his deal was successful when he sent you a text telling you to put your best dress on because he was taking you out that night. Harry had taken you to the best restaurant in the city, after closing a multi-million dollar deal in NYC that afternoon, and now you were both on your way back to your hotel room after dinner.

“The meal was lovely, baby. But we both know this is what I’ve been waiting for all day.” Harry said quietly, one of his hands on your lower back as the elevator took you to the top floor.

As soon as the door of your hotel room closed, Harry made use of his hold on your hand to spin you around, pressing his body against yours.

His lips crashed against yours, putting everything he had into the kiss.

It was desperate, hungry.

He travelled down your neck, not afraid to leave any deep red marks.

He didn’t care- You were his.

“Taste so sweet, baby.”

“Uh huuu-” You threw your head back against the wall as he hit your sweet spot on your neck, “Fuck.”

“Need to fuck you so bad.” Harry groaned, his hand sliding up your back to find the zipper on your dress.

“Fuckin’ hell.” He said, unable to find the zipper, “Fuck it.”

He gripped to sides of the thin fabric, and in one swift moment ripped it clean in half.

“Harry!”

“I don’t give a shit, baby. I’ll buy you a thousand new dresses.”

He was rock solid underneath his pants as he tore the dress off of your body, discarding the ruined fabric on the floor.

“Just gotta be inside you.”

“Please fuck me, Harry.” You plead, pushing your hips against his.

You felt his erection through his pants, and you moaned into his shoulder as you began to grind against him.

“Undo my belt.” He said, “Gotta get these pants off.”

You fumbled with his belt buckle, his cold hands keeping you steady as he held your waist. You unbuttoned his pants and slid then to the ground.

“Rip your shirt off,” You said, “Please.”

He smirked, grabbing hold of his shirt and ripping it clean off, buttons popping off and flying all over the room.

You began to grind against him again, and Harry moaned- there was less fabric between you than previously, but still not the skin on skin that he wanted.

“I want to see your gorgeous tits.” He breathed as he unclipped your bra.

You slid off his boxers and watched, your eyes wide, as his cock sprung free.

“Fuck me.” You said, “Need you so bad.”

“‘M gonna fuck you till you’ve forgotten your own name, baby.” He said, “And the whole of Manhattan is gonna watch.”

Harry led you over to the back wall of the hotel room- the wall that was completely glass.

He slid off your panties, and ran a finger through your folds.

“Fuckin’ dripping.” He grinned devilishly, “The thought of New York watching us fuck really turns you on, hm?”

“Harry-” You begged, “Please.”

“Tell me.” He repeated. “Does the idea of people watching you cum all over my cock make you horny?”

You nod.

“That’s my good girl. Now face the window so I can fuck you.”

Harry took his cock in his hand, inhaling a deep breath to control himself as he stroked himself a couple of times.

“Gonna make you cum all over me, baby.”

“Hurry up and fuck me.” You plead.

He grins.

“Only patient girls get daddy’s cock.”

You were fucking dripping. He hadn’t even touched you yet and you were withering at his words. He had you wrapped around his little finger and you couldn’t care less. You could let him degrade you for the rest of your life and you’d thank him.

“My little slut is gonna scream my name all night, and New York is gonna listen.”

Harry inserts his cock into you without any warning, and you cry out.

“Holy shit.” You cry, “Oh my god.”

He thrusts as quick as he possibly can, fucking you hard and deep against the window, the glass steaming up with your hot, quick breaths.

“So fucking tight. Fucking love the feeling of my dick in you.”

“Oh my god Harry, keep going please.”

“You’re so fucking hot want my dick in you forever.”

Harry thrusts at a pace you’ve never felt him go at before. He was desperate, his body pushing you against the glass as your walls clenched around him.

“Harry-”

“Cum. Cum for daddy.”

“Oh my god Harry- Oh my- FUCK.”

You cum hard. Your orgasm washes over you to the point you almost black out. If it wasn’t for his hands gripping your waist you would have collapse. Harry continues to thrust inside you until his own came. He filled you up with his cum, his moans filling the room.

#harry styles #harry styles au #harry styles one shot #harry styles smut #harry styles x reader #fanfic #harry styles angst #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fic #one direction #smut #smut one shot

[satorusugurugurl]

Geto or Gojo being mean asf in bed😍

Anon, I love you.

Action’s and Consequences!

Pairing: Geto Suguru x FAB Y/N

Word Count: 2,499

Warnings: Mentions of drugging, alcohol consumption, language, rough sex, fighting, Mean!Suguru 🥵

Summary: The morning after a terrible night at the club starts with you and Suguru’s first major fight. A fight that Suguru will make sure you never forget.

“Oh my god! Give me a fucking break!” You yelled behind you as Geto stormed after you. “I made a stupid mistake!”

Geto scoffed, grabbing your arm and hauling you back. “A simple mistake?! You call letting some guy buy you a drink without watching him a simple mistake!? Y/N, he fucking slipped you something!!” You winced, partially from your hangover, and the other half was due to the lack of food in your stomach.

“I was talking to his friend! Just like you were letting THAT skank rub up against you!”

This was the nastiest fight you and Suguru had ever gotten into. You both went out with Satoru and Shoko to a new club. There had been shots involved, lots of shots. And you had been having fun until you spotted a girl rubbing her hand against your boyfriend’s chest, and he just let it happen. So, in retaliation, you started talking to some guy who bought you a drink that just so happened to be laced with something.

If it hadn't been for Satoru, who hates alcohol, the guy would have snuck you to the back. Instead, Satoru rubbed your back while you were in the hall puking your guts out, getting whatever the dick slipped you out of your system. Geto was livid, mainly at the asshole who hurt you.

But he was also mad at you.

The morning had come, and it was not a peaceful morning. It had been a yelling match since you woke up to find Suguru watching you, telling you you needed to talk about what happened. All of this started with him! He let that random bitch touch him. Yet he wanted to blame you!

“You are such a fucking brat!” He snapped, grabbing his jacket. “If you had stopped and watched me, I pulled away the second that girl touched me! All you saw in your drunken haze was a second!” Your nose burned as tears flooded your eyes. “Oh, but you should know how a second works! Because all it took was a second for some guy to drug you!!”

“Geto, I'm not playing your fucking game!!”

“Fine by fuckin’ me!”

Without another word, he stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door in his wake. You screamed in frustration, heading to the bathroom to cool off. Stupid Geto, stupid skank, stupid club! Last night sucked, and today sucked even more.

You wanted to stay angry, to boil with rage. But as you stood in the shower, the hot water running over you, your mind cleared. You didn't watch Suguru when the girl touched him. It happened in a flash. The alcohol made it worse than it was. While the anger consumed you, you made a stupid decision and didn't focus on your safety. You had put yourself in a terrible situation.

It could have turned out worse if Satoru hadn't been watching you as the forever DD.

Thinking back, you grimaced at thinking about what Suguru had gone through. To have his loving girlfriend fine and dandy, and the next she's vomiting a laced drink up? He had every right to be worried and upset when you had nothing to be angry about.

Suguru brought you home, gave you water, and held your head back when you got sick. And the first thing you did was yell at him? All because he wanted to talk (like an adult) about what happened.

God, was this what it felt like to be in the dog house?

After your shower, you got dressed, trying to call your boyfriend. Each attempt went straight to voicemail, and your texts were left on read. Your little fights didn't even count as fights! This was uncharted territory. Because you had never pissed Suguru off like this.

An hour and a half later, the door opens to the apartment, and you run for the door. Suguru places two cups of coffee on the table and a sack from the convenience store. He says nothing as he chucks his jacket off, draping it over the couch.

You swallow hard, stepping towards him. “S-Sugu is that coffee for me.” All you get is a nod. “I uhm, thank you.” Another nod. God, you hated the cold shoulder! You didn't want to keep fighting! “Suguru, can we talk please?” Dark eyes finally dart towards you.

“I thought you didn't want to play my games?”

“I-I was mad this morning when I should have shut my mouth.” Your voice was nearly inaudible. “I thought you were letting girls touch you.”

“No, you assumed girls were touching me.” Suguru clarified as he towered over you. “When I have been faithful and loyal to you since day one! But you, you let some guy buy you a drink, you allowed him the chance to hurt you!”

His words stung, but they were true. “I'm sorry, I was wrong. I put myself in a terrible position. All because I was jealous.” tears hit the floor as you finally looked up at Suguru with a sniffle. “I'm so sorry. Please give me another chance. I'll never let it happen again, Suguru.” Seeing you cry, hearing you apologize and own up for what happened, well, it left Suguru somewhat satisfied.

But he was still pissed.

“I hate it when people look at you like you're some meal for the taking. I hate it even more when you allow them to buy you a drink and drug you.” He lifted your chin with his forefinger, his eyes glancing at your neck. “Maybe I need to collar you and keep you on a fucking leash.”

His words were like ice, but there was a fire in his eyes. One you were familiar with. “I-If that would make you feel better, that's fine.”

"Maybe that'll make me feel better," Suguru growled, wrapping his hand around your throat as he looked into your eyes. "Maybe that's what I need. Total control. Make you mine in every sense of the word." He slowly smirked. "Yeah. That's it."

“O-Okay. . .yeah, I like the sound of that.”

The second he had your consent, his lips feverishly crashed against your own, kissing you deeply. Suguru pulled back a moment later, looking at your flushed face with a snark before kissing you again. Fuck you tasted so good, and the way you willingly submitted to him was almost too much for him to handle.

The intensity of the kiss and his hand gripping your throat. It made your pussy throb with unfiltered need. He was never this mean and rough, and holy hell. You liked it.

Feeling you melt against him has Suguru growling in need. "What? You like this, don't you?" He nipped at your neck, making sure he marked you. “Like me getting mad at you.”

You couldn't respond. All you managed to do was whine. And Suguru didn't like that. His hand gripped your throat, squeezing gently. "I asked you if you liked it bitch.”

Your eyes widened as you gasped for air. Tears spilling down your flushed cheeks. “Y-Yes, I like it when you're mad!” He let go of his hand on you, allowing it to simply hover over your sensitive throat.

"Now tell me if it was a lie. Do you like this?"

You whined, realizing he wasn't going to let up. “Yes! I'm telling you the truth, Sugu!”

Suguru grinned, cocking an eyebrow. "Yeah? God, what a nasty slut you are, Y/N." He quickly pulled your shirt up, diving into your tits, massaging them with both hands as he kissed and nipped at your hardening nipples.

Seeing Suguru like this, feral and angry, wanting to put you in your place. That was the only foreplay you would have needed. God, it was so hot.

Noticing your glazed-over eyes, Suguru let go moments later, sliding his hands down to pull your shorts and panties off, leaving you completely naked. "Lucky me,” his eyes trailed over you, “I’m dating the prettiest bitch in the world~" He purred.

Biting your lip, you watched him. “Thank you.” Your thighs glistened with slick, and seeing that Suguru dragged you to the bedroom.

He threw you onto the mattress, grabbing both your legs and pressing them against your chest. Fully exposing your cunt for him to see in all its dripping glory. You turned red, your hand covering your face at his rough actions.

“W-What are you doing?” You squeaked out, peeking at him through your fingers.

"I told you I was going to make you mine," Suguru grumbled, reaching down, tugging down the hem of his sweatpants, tucking them under his balls. “My naughty slutty girlfriend doesn’t listen to me." He growled softly as he leaned down, kissing and biting at your neck again. It always made you melt, and he wanted to feel it again before he fucked you stupid.

You sighed breathlessly, shivering and melting against him. Mewls escaped your lips as you gripped the sheets beneath you. “Mnngh, f-fucking fuck shit.” You sometimes hated how sensitive your neck was, and now that he knew it, you were clay in his hands.

Suguru held you down with one hand while sliding the other down to wrap around his cock, positioning it to a tight entrance. "Are you ready to be fucked into submission?~" He asked as he slid the tip inside of you.

Tilting your head back, you whine at the stretch. “F-Fuck.” You never would get over how big he was. “Suguru.” You tried looking at your conjoined bodies.

Suguru moaned, slowly sliding further inside of you. You could feel his hips trembling. He was holding back. Making sure he didn’t hurt you.

You stared at him in shock. “Fuck me.” You whispered, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. “Y-You said you were going to make me yours. .that you were going to fuck me stupid.”

Suguru’s movement ceased as his

eyes widened, focused on you before an evil smile split across his face, and he slammed into you. "Fuck yeah-!!"

You dug your nails into his back. Eyes widening, as your mouth fell in an ‘O’ shape, all the air was fuvked out of your lungs.

Hissing at the scratches down his back, Suguru growled, the pain egging him on. He thrusted hard into you, quickly setting a dominating rhythm, ruining your insides with his massive cock. "Fucking-Fuck-! Such good fucking pussy. Too bad my girlfriend was a little shit last night. Or this could have been romantic~" He growled out. “Instead, I have to fuck some common fucking sense into her!”

Tears started to pour down your cheeks at the overstimulation. Before a sob could escape, Suguru gently slapped your cheek. "Nuh huh bitch, you're the one who told me to fuck you like I meant it, Princess~" He growled, one hand sliding down to rub your clit.

You whimpered and arched your back, “I-I know! I'm sorry! So sorry!.” You cried out while staring up at the ceiling.

“Tsk,” Suguru grabbed your chin, forcing you to look into his eyes. "You're mine." He thrust harder into your tight pussy. "You're mine because I want you, Y/N. I fucking wanted you the second I saw you."

“Y-Yes!.” That was all you managed to say. “Yes, I’m yours.” You wrapped your arms around his neck.

“If you ever let some stranger buy you a drink again, I won't be as fuckin’ nice. I love you, dumbassdont fuckin’ forget it! No one else but you!”

“Yes! I'm sorry it won't happen again!”

Suguru groaned, leaning down and biting your neck as he felt the coil in his stomach tightening. It was your grip around his cock that tightened with the bite that sent him over the edge. He started to fill you up, his cum painting your walls white.

You lay there panting softly as you felt his cum filling you up. “F-Fuck.” you breathed out, relaxing against the bed. Still buried inside of you, you looked down to see his entire torso, rippling muscles covered in sweat.

"You didn't cum."

Suguru throbbed inside of you, his cock pressing against your G-spot as he bent down to get closer to your face. "You're going to fuckin’ cum. Sure, I'm ticked off, but I’m not a sadistic asshole.” When you didn't respond, he sighed before reaching over to the bedside table and grabbing your vibrator. He turned it on the highest setting, pressing it against your clit right away. "Now be a good girl for once and cum."

“A-Ah! Sensitive Suguru!” You started rocking against him, nipples hard as you watched him. “Feels good, though~!!”

Suguru growled as he slowly rocked into you. "That's it~" He reached with his free hand, rolling one of your nipples between his fingers.

Within seconds, whether it was the fact that you liked seeing Suguru so mad or the sex was just so good, his actions made you gush around his cock. The intensity of it made you scream, gripping the pillow behind you as your legs shook.

Feeling you cum around him was enough to have his cock filling you up with his cum for the second time this morning; globs of your combined juices seeped around his girth. "Shit-!"

You were shaking, eyes glazed over with pleasure. Just as you released your grip on the pillow. Suguru held you firmly against him before he slowly pulled out of you, leaning down and kissing you deeply. It was a vivid contrast to the man that just fucked you stupid, but it was also sweet and very much like Suguru.

“Don't ever scare me like that again. You got lucky last night Y/N.”

The guilt began to rise in your chest again. “I know I'm sorry. Truly, I am Sugu.” His eyes bore into yours. “I'm sorry.” he pressed another kiss against your lips.

“I'm sorry I didn't protect you.”

“Suguru, you don't have to apologize. You took great care of me last night.” he hummed, stroking your hair. “Please don't beat yourself up.”

“I won't if you don't.”

“Ah,” you giggled, shaking your head, “you would play that card.” You ran your hands over his shoulders.

“Yeah, just shut up and relax. You need to get all the rest you can.” there was a certain smugness in his tone. One that reminded you of your high school days.

You blinked, pulling back to stare at Suguru. “Why?”

“Because you owe Satoru a favor for saving you. And you'll be taking my place at the Sweets-Expo he wants to visit in Kyoto next weekend.”

“Just me and Satoru?” You gulped.

“For an entire weekend. And you know Satoru, he's going to visit every single vendor.” He smirked, hearing your audible groan. “Suffer.”

“Is it too late to ask you to stay mad at me?”

Suguru grinned against your skin. “That boat sailed the second you apologized when I got home.” he kissed your collarbone, savoring your groan of defeat.

#getou suguru x y/n #jjk men #jjk suguru #jjk geto #jjk x you #jjk smut #JJK #reader x geto #geto suguru #reader x suguru #suguru x reader #getou suguru x you #suguru geto smut #jujutsu kaisen suguru #suguru x you #suguru smut #jjk x reader #geto suguru smut #geto x reader

[thebearer]

maybe richie inviting you guys to take eva and teeny ted to the pumpkin patch 😔

picky |dad!caramen berzatto x mom!reader|

based off the above ask! with baby dorothea "teddy", richie, eva, and pumpkins :) apart of thebearer's ber month masterlist!

"Finally!" Richie threw his hands up, rolling his eyes at Carmen. "What took you so long?"

Carmen rolled his eyes, pulling the stroller out of the trunk. "There was traffic."

"Traffic? Cousin, we left at the same time-"

"-He wouldn't go over fifty, Richie." You grinned, poking your head out of the backseat. "Took us forever because he drove so slow-"

"-Well, I'm not drivin' like a fuckin' maniac, alright? Got a baby." Carmen snapped, rolling his eyes.

You beamed, eyes cutting to Richie's with a soft shrug, unfastening a sleeping Teddy out of her car seat gently. She was so adorable in her little coat and jacket. So tiny, you had squealed putting it on her, parading her around to show Carmen proudly- your precious baby Teddy Bear.

"Did you bring the baby?" An excited Eva startled you, bouncing on her toes behind you.

"Yeah." You nod, cradling Teddy's head carefully while you lifted her, shushing her when she started to fuss. "You wanna see her?"

Eva nodded, leaning up on her tip toes to peer at the tiny baby in your arms. "She's so little." Eva gasped lightly.

"She is." You nod. "She's gotten bigger, if you can believe it." You giggle, fixing Teddy's little hat over her ears, shutting the car door with your hip.

"Oh, look who it is." Richie grins, cooing at Teddy gently. "How are you doin', sweetheart? Sleepin' finally?"

"Yeah, 'm good." You hum through a half hug with Richie. "Sleeping more, now. She's kinda gotten on a schedule." You roll your eyes lightly, settling Teddy back into the stroller.

Carmen strapped her in, situating the blanket over her with a hushed tone. "You're ok, Teddy, you're alright." He muttered sweetly.

"Eva, go get your wagon." Richie nods towards the lines of bright red wagons by the entrance, watching the kid run bounding towards them.

Carmen's lips tightened, brow furrowing. "You don't-You don't go with her?" He asked Richie, eyes flitting to him cautiously.

"What? I can see her-"

"-Yeah, but what-what if someone tried to take her or somethin'?" Carmen muttered, eyes trained on Eva like if he looked away she might vanish.

"Then I'd get this out." Richie muttered, lifting his shirt lightly to show the glock resting in the band, both you and Carmen hissing at him to put it down. "No one's gonna do shit, alright? I won't let it. But what do you want from me? Want me to put her on a leash?"

Carmen shook his head, pushing the stroller on to the asphalt, his hand finding yours easily. "Hey, kid." Richie called, catching Eva's attention. "You want the maze first or are we pickin' a pumpkin?"

"Pumpkins." Eva nodded firmly. "Before all the good ones are gone, like last year." She glared at him in a tone and stare that made Carmen snort in laughter- she looked like Tiff.

"Yeah, yeah, you lead the way." Richie nods. "Or you want me to pull it?"

"You pull it." Eva hands him the wagon handle, settling into the dirty wagon easily.

"Are you gonna get a big pumpkin?" You ask her, steps falling with Carmen's.

"Yeah. We're carving them tonight." Eva nods.

"We are?" Richie looks at her carefully. "News to me, kid."

"Duh." Eva shook her head. "We have to, before they go bad."

"Yeah, alright." Richie grinned softly. "What about you, Cousin? Gettin' a big one to make that weird sh-stuff you made last year?"

Carmen rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, maybe." He nodded towards the barn. "You want somethin' from in there? Cider?"

"Yeah." You nodded, eyes cutting down to Teddy, who was stretching, blinking in the autumn sun. You smiled, watching her turn and look all wide eyed at the world around her. "Will you get me a cider donut if I ask really nice?" You tease lightly, lashes batting playfully up at Carmen.

"I'd get you one even if you didn't." Carmen grinned. "Hey, where's the pumpkins at? Behind the barn, right?"

"Yeah." Richie nods. "You need a break already?"

"Getting a donut." You shrug. "We'll meet you over there."

"You want anything? Eva?" Carmen asks, patting his pocket for his wallet.

"We'll get it on the way out." Richie nods. "Meet you back over here?"

"Pick me out a good pumpkin." You grin at Eva. "A big one, please."

Eva nods excitedly, while you settle at a picnic table, shaded under a tree. Teddy was gurgling, spit bubbles that had your heart swelling while her wide eyes darted around, stretching gently.

"It's pretty, isn't it, Teddy Bear?" You babbled lightly, pushing the stroller soothingly. "Are you gonna be like Mama? Gonna be a fall girly? Yes you are."

You pushed her slowly in the stroller, taking photos for your friends and family. Carmen came back, holding a white box and a drink carrier. "What's all this?" You giggle, taking the warm cider from his grasp.

"I got you a dozen." Carmen shrugged, settling beside you. "We can take the others home, and you can have 'em later, if you want."

You beamed, pressing a kiss to his cheek that had him flushing. "You didn't have to do that." You shake your head lightly, opening the box, mouth watering at the sugared donuts. "But I love you so much for doing it."

Carmen grinned, moving Teddy's blanket up. "She's being really good." He beamed.

"She is." You nod. "I think she's gonna be a fall fan too." You tear a piece of the donut off, plopping it in your mouth. "Have to come here every year, now, Berzatto. Have two girls that want to come."

Carmen just smiled. He'd gladly come out here every year if it made you happy, both of you.

"You want a bite?" You ask, offering a torn piece. Carmen nods, eating it off your fingers lightly, lips touching your fingers making your body shudder lightly.

"Fuck," He groans softly. "Forgot how good that is. Should get Marcus to make somethin' like that for the seasonal menu."

"Oh, that would be good." You nod. "I'd like it anyways."

"Yeah? I'll have him make some stuff, have you come over and approve them then." Carmen hummed, arm wrapping around your back gently. "You want to go to the maze?"

"Maybe." You sigh contently. "Is it bad I'm fine here? Just happy to be out of the house and in real clothes with my donuts and my baby."

Carmen laughed, nodding softly. "No, I'm on the same page." He grinned. "Feels good not to see the house or the restaurant. Good change of scenery, y'know?"

"Exactly." You nod. "It's cute out here." You look around at the crowds of people with their wagons, pumpkins, mums. "I can see why Richie and Eva like it."

Carmen nods, looking at Teddy, cooing at her lightly. "Think you'll take her out here when she gets older?" You hum. "Go pick pumpkins?"

"Yeah." Carmen nods, smiling down at the little baby. "You can come, too."

"Really?"

"C'mon," Carmen shakes his head lightly at you. "You're the best at picking pumpkins. Picked that one last year and it was amazing."

You laugh, leaning your head against his shoulder. "Thanks." You look at him, all starry eyed and mushy. "I'll come and share my talents, only if you buy me a donut every year."

"I fuckin' promise." Carmen grins, squeezing your hand lightly.

You sit in silence for a moment, pushing the stroller gently. "You're going to make that soup again with this pumpkin?"

"Yeah, yeah, I am." Carmen grins. "Fuck Richie, it was good. And-And he knows it too. Jagoff ate all of it last year. Just bustin' my balls about it now."

#thebearer ber months #thebearer #carmen berzatto #dad!carmen berzatto x mom!reader #dad!carmen berzatto #dorothea “teddy” berzatto #richie jerimovich #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto #the bear #carmen berzatto fluff #carmy berzatto fluff #carmen berzatto ​x fem!reader #carmen berzatto x female!reader #carmen berzatto x you #carmen 'carmy' berzatto

[queers-gambit]

Midsummer Night(mare)'s Dream

prompt: ( requested ) when Oliver's obsession reaches new heights, you fear Felix might return the affection - resulting in bloody flower petals suffocating you.

pairing: Felix Catton x female!reader

fandom masterlist: Saltburn

word count: 12.9k+

note: favorite trope here to stay

⚠️ you are responsible for the media you consume ⚠️

warnings: Hanahaki Disease AU: depiction of physical illness, medical phenomenon, blood, self-destruction; alcohol consumption, brief illicit material use and brief depiction of physical aggression, Lord's name in vain, cursing, angst, hurt and comfort, spoilers, AU timeline (obviously), "friends to 'strangers' to lovers", fix it Felix, "best friends" trope too, dead parents / family angst. requires maturity and caution.

When the first semester at Oxford started, something in your gut twisted with an unknown anxiety. Something in the air churned, a tide was turning, and there was something deeply amiss that you just couldn't put your finger on.

Your roommate was kind, your grades average with those that took education seriously, and your professors were decently challenging but in a good way. You didn't know what was wrong, why you suddenly felt anxious, but then, after asking your best mate why he was late to class the day of his first tutorial, Felix answered, "Had a flat tire."

You nodded, handing him the joint as you sucked in a sharp breath to hold the smoke in your lungs, "So you booked it?"

"No, actually," he chuckled. "Nice bloke named Ollie stopped t'help, offered me his bike."

You laughed, smoke billowing out, "Yeah? Tellin' me he just stopped and gave you his bike? Come off it - nobody's that nice. You flirt with him or something, Fi?"

"No, no, I'm serious! That's literally what happened!" He nestled his arm around your waist, "No, seriously, listen, right, I was on my way t'class, on time and all, yeah? Got a flat tire on my way. This lad, Ollie - Oliver - comes down the path, stops, asks what's goin' on, said he was in my college, so, he offered his bike 'cause he'd get it later, said he'd wheel mine back and all."

"Fuck off!" You shoved your elbow into his ribs.

"You only think people are out to do the worst, darling," Felix chuckled, flashing you a blinding smile. Neither of you could anticipate the series of events that this interaction would kick off. "Besides, he saved my fuckin' arse, I got t'class with enough time, didn't I?"

"Hmm," you agreed, a knot forming in your stomach as he handed you the joint back; both stretched out in your dorm bed as the thunder storm raged just shortly after you got back from class.

Perhaps you were too much of a cynic. Perhaps you grew up in a rougher part of the city with considerably less money, being skeptical of gestures of kindness. Perhaps you only knew people to be disingenuous.

Maybe you were just used to hearing these incredible stories from Felix Catton - certified spoilt best friend.

You grew up together; meeting as young children because your parents worked for one of the Catton's companies, your fathers having been childhood best friends, joining you two at the hip. You and Felix were two halves of one whole, a single functioning organism; becoming inseparable. You were meant to be soulmates, you were so sure of it, but in reality, it felt reassuring to have such a strong friendship that you never entertained the idea of romance.

Felix's friendship was genuine. It was built-on everyday, growing, evolving, forever changing to accommodate both your changing personalities. He accepted you for who you are, and it felt like he chose you everyday. Where others came and went, you remained. Where others abandoned you, there he was. There was no you without Felix and no Felix without you, and when the time came, you chose to attend Oxford together.

You knew how easy life was for him. You knew the silver spoon he was fed from. You knew he was the flame moths were drawn to.

Knowing Felix Catton was power-by-association, and you watched an endless slew of people come and go with the snuffed-out dream of being in his inner circle. You protected Felix (and the Cattons) from leeches and Felix protected you from, well, everything else. You were meant to be soulmates, you were so sure of it, and then everything changed the summer before senior year of secondary school when you moved in with him permanently.

Summer had just started, you were only two months away from turning 18, and then, a drunk driver drove your mother and father into a tree on the side of a road. There was nothing to be done when your parents were finally found, the EMTs assuring you they were dead on impact and did not suffer. You had been at home with Felix, who let you paint his toenails, the house phone ringing shrilly.

"Hello?" He answered for you, reporting your family's surname's residence. He hummed, then paused, looking at you. "It's St. Luke's Hospital, love?" Felix handed you the phone with curiosity.

When you reached for the landline, the nurse reported you were needed and asked if you had the means to get to them. You begged to know what happened, but all she said was, "There was an accident."

Felix drove you to the hospital.

Felix held your hand when you were lead to a private room, meeting a set of police officers.

Felix held you when you stumbled in shock upon being shown your parent's demise and Felix held your hair when you threw up after identifying bodies.

And the Cattons stood with you when the man responsible was sentenced to life in prison. They stood in the rain when you tossed two stones in the stream.

You lived with him from that moment on and sometime after, you accepted how in-love with him you were. He had always taken care of you, but that summer, he took care of you; being the glue that kept you together, the binding force that brought you into being, the reason you didn't waste away, give up, or lose yourself entirely.

When your final year before university began, you had to stomach the idea of loving him at a distance. He'd always been popular, charismatic, the sun at the center of everyone's galaxy that pulled all towards his warmth and light. But after losing his virginity at age 15, Felix was constantly running through partners and you didn't want to interrupt his "sexual awakening" despite the knife to the gut each girl stabbed. So, you kept your feelings to yourself and tried your hardest to be a staple in his life, and when you chose to attend Oxford, you made peace with the idea that you'd go another 4 years in silent denial.

Something about Oliver's little act of kindness just made you uneasy.

And then, the following night, Felix spotted his new little friend when you were out at the local pub and invited Ollie to sit at the table with you lot. You sat between Felix and Farleigh, India on your friend's other side - his cousin something akin to your own flesh and blood. After all, you had known them all for two nearly decades; marking you as one of the very, very few who could put Farleigh in his place. Eerily, you both shared a look of mild distain, but for very different reasons.

You didn't think yourself a jealous woman, but after meeting Oliver Quick in person, hearing him speak, watching him watch Felix, and witnessing how he interacted with everyone else, you grew uneasy in his presence. The night you met him officially, there was a funny tickle in your chest, and after a few too many coughs escaped, Felix whipped around at you instantly. "You gettin' sick, darlin'?" He asked, words drenched in genuine concern.

Oliver thought it was curious to use a pet name for a pretty girl while a different one was sat on his lap.

"I'm good," you assured, thinking the rain caused this reaction.

But as the night wore on, you coughed more and more. When Oliver got up to get the next round of shots, Felix, ever the sweetheart who had money at his disposal, scolded Farleigh for instigating the poor boy and stood with a note in his hand. Only you saw the real interaction of Felix subtly paying for the drinks, and when he returned, he set a glass of water in front of you.

He made sure you didn't drink the rest of the night, but you didn't want to - starting to feel unwell. "Fi, I'm gonna go - "

"Oh, no, love, c'mon, an hour longer," he pleaded as you stood. But he paused, examined your face, then standing without another word and tossed his arm around you, announcing to the table, "Right, we're off."

He ignored the jeers and complaints because he was swiftly escorting you away, and only when Farleigh clocked this did he scold the table to shut the fuck up. When you stepped outside, Felix was turning to you instantly, holding your cheeks in hand and using his thumb to wipe at the corner of your mouth.

"You're bleedin', love," he muttered, showing you his hand. You frowned and wiped the area yourself, seeing the crimson stain on the pads of your fingers. "Fuck. All right. C'mon, we can get you to the infirmary - "

"No, I don't think it's - "

"You've been coughin' all night and now you're bleedin'," he snapped, shushing you, "we're goin'!" When you just stared at him for a moment, he sighed, "I-I'm sorry, that was a bit more aggressive than needed. I'm just worried, love, you shouldn't be coughing blood."

"Might've just been smoking too much, yeah?"

Felix spoke your name with a hardened edge, staring at you for a long moment as neither of you wanted to back down. Finally, he cracked, "You're not gonna go, are you?"

"Nope. C'mon, I'm tired."

"Well, I'm stayin' the night incase you throw up," he declared, giving in and leading you towards your dorm.

"No, go back - "

"Not leavin' yah, love," he refused. "So, c'mon, tell me," he changed the subject, "what'd you think of Ollie?"

You sighed, "Nice enough lad, I guess."

"Told you," he grinned, weighing your heart to your feet.

For nearly every instance there after, you dreaded hearing Ollie's name or seeing him pop up at events. But that first night, as Felix dozed off in your bed, you were set on your knees, dry heaving in vain to free your throat from whatever suffocated you internally. When you managed to trigger your gag reflex, a stream of alcohol came spewing out - dotted with long, pretty, bright yellow petals.

You stared into the toilet, blinking in shock.

You always thought Felix was the human equivalent to a golden retriever with the disposition of a sunflower. In fact, there grew a small patch of sunflowers at Saltburn just for you; you and Felix planting them one summer together, kept alive after your parents died to bring you a little sunshine when you felt overwhelmed with storm clouds. After all, they were your favorite flower... Now being hacked out of your lungs in a ghastly, tacky mixture of blood, clots, and mucus.

As the year went, you didn't have another episode, but still did any and all research you could on your current phenomenon, wanting to avoid the hospital if you could.

The year flew by without much of a hitch, outside of Felix snapping on Ollie and distancing the lad from the group. However, just before exams, Felix came to you in need of help; saying Ollie's dad died, and being as he had both parents, he wasn't sure how to comfort the lad. It struck a nerve deep within you, going with Felix to talk to Ollie, and by the end, your arm had slung around the scholarship boy in pity, trying to talk him through part of his grief.

You didn't know the lad did his research on you and discovered you lived with Felix in his grand fucking castle because you were orphaned just before turning 18. It was the perfect "in", in Ollie's mind; a way to weasel close to you, solidifying himself to Felix.

You didn't like Ollie, he still made you feel uneasy, but you did pity him enough that you tolerated him. Now more than ever. He was back in the group before the day was done.

However, when exams concluded, Ollie was acutely aware that Felix attended the celebration to your exams - dressing you, pinning you for your accomplishments. You dressed and pinned Felix after his. And you both showed up for Ollie's exams, though, you dressed and pinned Farleigh as Felix did Ollie. He supposed it counted, still having the object of his desire back in sight; within his reach; staring at him with pride and a hint of pity.

It was exactly what Oliver wanted.

"Well, aren't you gorgeous?" Felix complimented when you arrived in the courtyard, dressing for the end-of-year ball. He stooped down to wrap you in a hug, giving a spin, and setting you on your feet as you laughed at his usual antics. "Absolutely a vision, love, seriously," he praised. "And I have a li'l something for us, hey?" He held up the champagne bottle.

"Christ," you mused, "what's the occasion? They'll supply cocktails there, Fi - "

"We're going to a funeral."

"I'm sorry?"

He sighed, handing you the bottle to dig in his trouser pocket and revealed a stone painted with the word, 'Dad'. Felix looked sheepish, "I thought we could do it for Ollie, yeah? Lad's had a real rough go of it all - "

"I think that's a nice idea, Fi," you cut him off, smiling in assurance, opening the wire on the bottle. "But first, a toast," you proposed, "to the start of summer."

"And end of exams," he agreed, taking the bottle back when you handed it over and popping the cork. He cheered as you drank first, taking his own, wrapping you in a tight hug. "We survived," he laughed, sighing after. "Really glad you were here with me through it, love."

"Yeah, me, too," you whispered, holding back creeping bile when your heart began to pound with harrowing tension. "All right, pretty boy, c'mon, sun's setting."

"Right," he pulled back, "I told Ollie to meet us in the courtyard."

"Which one?"

"C'mon," he laughed, taking your hand and leading you after him. You danced after him on your tip-toes, avoiding using your whole shoe and the high heel that elevated you off the ground several inches. "Easy, watch it, careful now," he teased.

"Hey," Farleigh greeted, watching you two go with a smile.

He bet Venetia that this was the summer you two got together. Felix had confided in him that he was considering the idea of settling down, having sowed his wild oats and being tired of running through girls like he had this past year. Farleigh never thought he'd hear such words from Felix Catton, but after seeing you and his cousin running off, he knew, it was only a matter of time before confessions were made.

"There he is," You pointed.

"Ollie!" Felix called, both of you jogging up to him. "Hiya, mate."

"Hey," He greeted you both as Felix didn't stop.

"C'mon, then! Follow us!"

Upon arriving at a stone bridge that passed over a thin stream, you let Felix explain what you were doing and why you were there. "So, in my family, we have this tradition, right? When somebody dies, we write their name on a, er, on a stone," he showed Ollie the stone he made, "and we chuck it in the river. My great-grandfather started it when his son died in the war. We've only done it for Y/N's parents and my dog so far, but... You know, I don't know, I just..."

"It helped, a bit," you filled in when Felix looked at you. You took the stone from Fi's hand and handed it to Ollie, offering, "Felt like our own private goodbye."

When Oliver took the stone and looked it over, Felix anxiously excused, "This feels a bit fucking stupid now."

"No. It's not stupid," Ollie insisted sincerely - only looking at Felix, like the whole world did. "Thank you."

"It's something, right?"

This lead into Felix explaining "what to do", Ollie taking a moment after. When he looked over, he saw Felix had positioned you in front of him, arms wrapped around your neck to keep you close, both screwing your eyes shut in prayer. It would've been endearing had this been an honest memorial...

When the stone was throw, it clattering into the mud on the embankment... A foreshadow you should've paid more attention to. This lead into you three sitting on the stone bannister, skipping the ball, sharing the champagne, and after learning about Ollie's poor living arrangements, for Felix to invite him home with you two. To Saltburn, setting in motion a series of unfortunate events.

That night, you stayed in Felix's dorm, asking, "Are you sure about this?"

"Hmm?"

"Ollie - coming home with us?"

"Oh, yeah, love, it'll be fine," he promised. "Gives us one more person in the house, that's never bad, is it?"

You couldn't answer, you didn't know.

Your first night home was memorable in the sense that Venetia, Felix's older sister, insisted on 'girls night' and locked you both in her room. "So? Did you tell him yet?" She rushed with an excited grin, pouring you both a glass of wine. "Farleigh and I have a bet goin' - "

"Tell who, what?"

She glared, "Don't play coy. You're in love with Felix!"

"Venetia!"

"Oh, shove off, I won't tell him - but does that mean you haven't either?"

"If I did, you honestly think I'd be here?"

"Well, yes - "

"He doesn't feel the same," you insisted, "and if I tell him, he wouldn't want me here anymore, it'd be awkward."

"You're absolutely insane if you think any of that is true!"

"Ven."

"He's mad for you."

"He say that?"

"Well, no, but I can tell."

"It's not gonna happen," you sighed, shaking your head. "Not with all his interests, and those interested in him," you explained bitterly.

"I think you should tell him," she nodded. "It wouldn't hurt to tell the truth, but it might give you both some relief. I promise, he doesn't want you out of his life, so, even by the off chance he doesn't feel the same, he'd still want you around. Oh, know what would be romantic? Writing him a note! You've always been a talented writer."

By the end of the bottle, you and Venetia had started drafting a letter; confessing your feelings and coming up with the grand idea to ask him to meet you in the maze if he felt the same. It was where you both went when wanting solidarity, being a place of worship for you both. The center of the maze was remote, private, being where your tears could be shed and secrets shared.

It felt fitting to meet there.

Your letter wasn't perfected to your standards until Ollie arrived. His first night, you began to feel that tickle in your chest again, and for some reason, you mistook this for 'butterflies' and decided tonight was the night. So, you snuck into Felix's room before dinner, knowing he was already out, and left your note on his bed; unaware that Oliver was watching through the crack in the bathroom door.

He slithered in when you were done, slowly approaching the bed, and fingering the letter. He plucked it in hand, opened the unsealed envelope, and read your confessional; requesting, that if he even had an inkling of returned affection, he'd meet you after dinner, in the maze. At the center, beneath the Minotaur statue.

Ollie stared at your flourish of a signature and instantly crumpled the letter, surging back into his room and shredding it into bits. He swept them away into the waste bin and adjusted his jacket.

"There you are!" Felix smiled, finding you in the hall. "Don't you look nice, darlin'."

"You always say that."

"I always mean it," he grinned, escorting you to the dining room.

Dinner was... Interesting, to say the least.

You were distracted by nerves only Oliver clocked, Venetia giggling and Felix the center of attention - as usual. He reached out a few times to grab your thigh, asking muttered questions in your ear, making sure you were all right after he noticed you had barely eaten. Oliver had to hide his amusement as you just seemed anxious, and when dinner was ended, he watched you scurry from the room as if the Devil was at your heels.

"Oh, is my darling girl all right?" Elspeth asked in concern.

"She had a lot of wine," Farleigh smirked.

"Ah, yes," Mrs. Catton waved off, and Felix stood from the table shortly after.

Oliver stalked by the windows that evening, catching sight of you, still in your evening gown, cutting through the mist to head into the maze. He smirked, hearing Felix in his room - but then catching sight of Venetia through a different window. A different part of his plan roared to life that night; meeting the sultry sister under the moon, both knowing you were waiting in the dark for Felix.

You paced in the cold. Your dress drug through the grass, bare feet tickled.

The hour drug by slowly. You lit another cigarette, watching the mouth of the maze.

The second hour rushed by. Your stomach knotted.

Three, four hours ticked by. And you were left standing alone, in the middle of the maze, coughing and wheezing.

You dropped to your knees when your ailment turned physically violent; fingernails digging into the mud as you choked and heaved, trying in vain to clear your throat. When you stuck your fingers down your throat, you threw up bile, dirt, acid, wine, and long, bright yellow sunflower petals - sobs soon wracking your entire being.

He didn't come... He didn't come. He didn't come.

You threw up twice more, blood staining your chest and dress; teeth outlined in red, the dewy taste of pollen left on your tongue. You sobbed until your head hurt, and sobbed some more; confusion and heartache taking over. When you managed to find your feet, you felt lighter, thinner, smaller, less of yourself than you have ever before.

A piece of you had officially cracked away, being spewed into the mud and grass at the base of the Minotaur statue.

When venturing back to your room, you gasped when you nearly smacked into Duncan. You stared at one another in mild shock, his eyes taking in your state and you quietly begged, "Please... Don't say anything to Sir and Mrs. Catton. I don't want them t'worry until I know what's wrong. I-I'm going to the doctors, Duncan, please, give me time to figure this out."

He nodded sadly, shocked by the blood left behind. The following morning, he didn't wake you... He let you sleep, demanding you be left alone to the waitstaff. When Elspeth questioned your absence at breakfast as Ollie entered the dining room, Duncan was heard, "Miss L/N was up early this morning, went for a run. She went back to bed, said she didn't sleep well."

"Oh, the poor darling," Sir James Catton tutted.

"Morning," Ollie greeted, careful not to let his excitement show over your empty chair beside Felix. Venetia was staring at her brother in near anger, confusing him, but distracted instantly by Oliver's arrival. Sir James greeted him first, Venetia followed, and Felix invited the lad to help himself to a meal.

You had sobbed the whole night, puking bits of blood as the flower petals tightened your windpipe; the tackiness making them stick like glue. You didn't know what to do - there was no way you could face the Cattons now, not after Felix surely told them that you would leave Saltburn (for good) soon.

But sometime after breakfast, there was a knock at your door.

"Come in," you bid quietly, debating if you should start packing or not. When Felix entered, he was holding a bouquet of sunflowers, smiling softly.

"All right, love?"

"What?"

He chuckled, "I'm asking if you're all right, we missed you at breakfast."

You just blinked stupidly, "Uh, y-yeah, guess I am."

"Good," he chirped, approaching you and handing over the flowers. "Got these for you, thought maybe you could use a bit cheering up?"

"Why would I...? Felix, is there - is there anything you want to say to me?"

"Uh, no? Not really, I mean, I was gonna see if you fancied coming with us to the field?"

You stared at him in confusion. "You... Don't want me to go?"

"Go? Go where?" He laughed, "Cause yes, I'd like you to go with us... To the field? I just asked you - you sure you're feeling all right?"

"Um, y-yeah," you swallowed thickly, petals peeling back down your throat. "Thank you, for these," you accepted the flowers.

"Figured, with your parent's anniversary comin' up, should keep you close, you know?"

You shook your head, "Wasn't even on my mind, Fi..."

"And I just put it there, Christ, Felix, fantastic job," he cursed himself, hand through his hair in stress. "I'm sorry, love, I didn't mean - "

"You didn't, it's fine - I-I mean, I'm fine," you assured, trying to stave off tears. "Actually, Fi, I'm feeling a bit tired, think I'll nap."

"Duncan said you were?"

"No, no, I didn't get back t'sleep," you nearly whispered, needing to clear your throat again. "You lot have fun, I'll find you later."

"Sure? 'S Ollie's first time," he taunted. "Don't wanna miss that, do yah, love? And we're reading The Half-Blood Prince together, can't miss that."

"I'll catch up tonight, promise," you nodded, "just tell me what chapter you get through."

Felix stared at you, reaching to pinch your jaw and pet his thumb down your cheek. He whispered, "Sure you're all right?"

You nodded, shaking off his touch, hating how easy it was to fall in love with him. "Just tired, pretty boy. Promise."

"All right, well... Find us later, yeah?"

"'Course."

But you didn't leave your room for three days, unable to control the vomiting spells, the blood, the pain, the petals... The gutwrenching heartache. Venetia checked on you damn near every other hour, sitting, resting your head in her lap, stroking your locks in comfort as you sobbed.

"Tell me what's happening?" She begged, unable to get it out of you yet. But you felt another wave, jumping from her embrace to rush into the restroom; sliding on your bruised knees in front of the toilet. She followed, and like her brother's done many times, gathered your hair to hold back. "Jesus fucking Christ!" She gaped, seeing the blood and long, bright yellow petals. "Are those - what the fuck is that!?"

You heaved greatly, throat shredding as blooms and stubby stems cut up your esophagus. When you stared at the devastatingly beautiful blooms coated in your blood, floating atop of the water, you looked up at your friend and confessed, "I'm in love with your brother."

"I know, babe - "

"And he doesn't feel the same," you sobbed; breaking down, panting for breath, Venetia dropping to your level to pull you into her chest. "I-I-I left him the letter, Ven, I-I-I asked him to meet me..."

"He didn't show?"

"I waited hours!" You wailed, finally breaking down after the past couple of years caught up to you. "He never came! An-And then, he shows up with flowers - with fucking sunflowers! - acting as if he never saw my letter! Acting as if he didn't know! Like - Like it's easier to ignore than confront!"

"Oh, sweet girl," she whispered, gently rocking you both as you couldn't catch your breath.

Neither of you attended dinner that evening. Felix showed up again, like he had everyday, asking if you were hungry while holding a plate of toast and mug of tea. But you had passed out in Venetia's arms, the fake blonde waving her brother away, doing her best not to snap at him - remembering she made you a promise that she wouldn't interfere. You feared if she got involved, you really would be asked to leave Saltburn and you had nowhere else to go.

The following morning, you were up before Venetia.

"Hey," she grunted, stretching in your bed after spending the night. "You all right? What're you doing?"

"Goin' for a run," you answered, lacing your trainers.

"How do you feel?"

"Well," you sighed, "pretty fucking foolish, but it's summer. Yeah? Best not to dwell on what I can't have..."

"But it's killing you, love," she sat up.

"I'll get over it," you assured, not believing yourself. "If he can act as if nothing's happened, so can I. Do me a favor, though, love?"

"Anything."

"Sit between us?"

She frowned, watching you head out of the room. When she peered from the window, she saw you setting off around the ground and flopped back into bed for another hour.

"Oh, there you are!" Elspeth gasped when you entered the dining room that morning - jetting out of her chair. "Oh, darling, are you all right? Gave us a fright - thought you were sick or something!"

"Just a wee stomach bug, I promise," you accepted her embrace.

"I'm glad you've joined us," she whispered. "Felix has been dreadfully annoying."

"I can hear you, Mum," Felix groaned when you two pulled back. "Ven, hop down one," He told his sister.

"No, no, stay put, love, I can sit here," you assured the siblings, taking the seat on the other side of the sister.

Felix frowned instantly. "Don't think I've ever seen you two sit apart all these years," Sir James teased, reaching to pat your hand. "Good to have you join us, darling."

"Thank you," you whispered, Duncan placing a plate before you.

"How come she's served?" Ollie wondered without thinking.

"Miss Y/N has been unwell," Duncan replied stiffly.

"Oh, tell the truth, Duncan," you smirked, "I'm just your favorite."

It spurred the family on, Farleigh offering you a look of confusion from across the table. You waved him off, not once looking to your left at Felix - only ever answering Venetia by looking directly at her, avoiding her brother.

Felix felt something in his gut shift as you avoided him more and more. Venetia all but moved into your room, or you into hers - not wanting you alone in this time of duress. Meaning, each time Felix tried to get you alone for questioning, his sister was driving him away. When hanging out as a group, you no longer were at Felix's side, but opted for Venetia and Farleigh's.

It left a gaping hole for Ollie to fill - happily.

"Did I do something, you think?" He asked Oliver one day, floating in the lake, watching you braid Ven's hair as she read from her copy of The Half-Blood Prince.

"No, just maybe," Ollie shrugged, "it's, I don't know, girl stuff?"

"I'm her best mate, she never avoids me like this," Felix frowned. Oliver hated how genuinely hurt Felix sounded. "Seriously, what did I do?"

"I couldn't say, mate. Maybe just let her cool off, come to you when ready," he advised, watching Felix nod sadly and stare at you from behind his sunnies. He craved Felix's attention that you so effortlessly warranted.

You didn't sit with Felix during movie nights anymore, opting for the furthest seat on the floor at Sir James' feet. You didn't spend the night in his room once, nor let him into yours. You weren't on his tennis team. You didn't share sunbeds.

You no longer met for midnight swims, something that made Felix explicitly sad. He waited with his feet in the water, but this time, you were the one who never showed up.

You didn't sit with him at meals, making his family acutely suspicious. Yet neither of you seemed at odds - so, what were the truly worried over? You acted as if there wasn't a thing wrong, but they all noticed the sickly state you took on.

You thinned out, you barely ate a fourth of your meals, you went on runs as often as you could - even in the sweltering heat. You barely slept, creating bags under your eyes, dull, lifeless hair, and a concerning docile attitude. It was as if you were haunting the castle, barely visible, making yourself into a shell of who you once were.

You simply weren't yourself and the Cattons had no idea how to help. Elspeth sent tea to your room. Sir James let you pick movies for family movie nights, but you never seemed interested. Farleigh tried to engage you on the daily, but nothing seemed to register. Even Oliver put on a show by approaching you at the lake, sitting beside you, trying to strike a conversation.

"Sorry, Ollie, I was about t'go for a run," you eased.

"Been goin' on a lot of those. Want company?"

"No," you refused.

"Sure it's a good idea?" He asked. "Been throwing up a lot, might make it worse."

This made you freeze from where you had stood, slowly turning to look down at him. "Excuse me?" You seethed. "You spying on me?"

"I can hear yah sometimes," he nodded. "You're hiding it from the others, aren't yah? The blood, the tears... The way you're wasting away?"

From a short distance, Felix recognized the angry look and body language you wore. Slowly lowering yourself, you hissed to Ollie, "You keep your fucking mouth shut or I'll make sure you're on the first train back to fucking nowhere tomorrow morning. Hear me? You don't know shit about a Goddamn thing, you don't fucking know me, and if you're smart, you'll shut the fuck up, Oliver."

He watched you with a small smirk; standing over him before vacating the lake's shore.

That night, Oliver heard moaning from the adjoining bathroom. Upon his 'investigation', he spied Felix in the clawed-foot bathtub; steam wafting from the water, sweat beading down his skin, and bicep pumping vigorously as he pleasured himself. But what infuriated Oliver was the subtle, nearly slurred and unintelligible moan of your name from Felix's mouth. It seems, despite his best effort to drive a wedge between you two, there was lingering emotion that neither knew what to do with.

You were withering away, and Felix was self pleasuring to you.

Oliver had to up the ante, but how? You avoided the Cattons on a rotating basis - not letting any of them too close to figure out you were devastatingly ill, except Venetia. And the sister wasn't about to spill this darkening secret of yours, she was loyal to a fault.

Only Oliver seemed to know this dark little tale, figuring Felix hadn't even admitted his feelings for you to himself. Perhaps why he found relief in the tub, releasing into the water with a tear falling from his eye over the idea that you no longer wanted to sustain a friendship. It was all terribly confusing for the summer residents at Saltburn. And yet, in an effort to feel closer to Felix than you ever had, Oliver climbed into the draining bathtub and slurped Felix's cum as if it were water from The Holy Grail.

It made him feel superior. It made him feel as if he were winning an endless race. Made him feel like he was validated in pushing you out in favor of himself - no matter the history between you and the Cattons. Made him feel like he was solidifying himself amongst the distant royalty and you were giving reason to be thrown out of Saltburn.

But he would underestimate the power of family.

He got a little too cocky the night he met Venetia outside, in the moonlight, with Farleigh watching from his window.

The following morning, there was a pounding at your door - a rare night Ven didn't sleep with you. When you opened the door, Felix came pushing in, looking purely distraught.

"Look, I know you're pissed at me for whatever reason - but I fucking need to talk to you, okay? Please - I-I feel like I'm about to lose my mind, Y/N, love, please - "

"What's happened?" You asked, shutting the door. "I was about to head out - "

"Please, love! Please!"

"Christ Almighty, all right, the fuck's goin' on with you? Hey? Looks like you're gonna give yourself a stroke," you approached him, caressing his bicep. "What happened?"

"He kissed her."

"Come again?"

"Fucking Ollie - Oliver! He fucking kissed Venetia!"

"When?"

"Last night, Farleigh saw them."

"Oh, love, c'mon, you know Farleigh doesn't like Ollie."

"So, he's lying? You think he's lying?"

"I didn't say that, but you're all worked up. C'mon, just breathe for a minute, gonna pass out from the way you're huffin' and puffin'."

"Please, be serious! This is serious!"

"I know it is, I'm just trying to be rational."

"So, Farleigh's lying."

"Well, I don't think so - kinda a huge lie t'tell, innit?"

"I thought so," he snapped, hand through his hair in anxiety. "I-I mean, how could he? How could Ollie do this - I-I mean, my sister? My fucking sister?"

"Love, if you're this worked up, just go talk to him," you tried. "Ask Ollie point-blank what happened."

"Would you ask Venetia?"

"No, darling, that's not how this works."

"Well, how will we know who's lying? Farleigh or Ollie?"

"I don't know - is this even something to lie about? What did Farleigh say?"

"He saw them - tonguing - practically eating each other!"

You sighed, "Love? You're not gonna want t'hear this."

"God, what?"

"Venetia's a big girl, she can tongue and eat who she pleases."

"It's bad form, though, innit? I mean - he's my friend, my guest, here under my invitation, and he gets with my sister?"

You shrugged slightly, "I don't know, Fi, but she's allowed to do as she pleases; Ollie, too. It's not like either are dating someone, hey? What? You jealous? Of your sister?"

"Fuck off with that, know that's not it," he snapped again.

"What is it, then?"

"It's another Eddie situation!"

You sighed, "Fi... You can't horde people, right? Ollie bein' here, he's free game to you, Farleigh, Ven."

"And you?"

"Fuck no, lad gives me the creeps," you blanched.

"Still?"

"Yeah, fuckin' still. Call it intuition, but there's something off, Felix. I know you don't want to hear it, but when I have ever been wrong? Huh? Tell me."

"You've not been."

"Exactly - I know a leech when I see one. So, you draw your assumptions, but perhaps what Farleigh saw is true, perhaps not - but you'll get more answers by confronting the truth than ignoring it."

He sighed, dropping to your bed, shaking his head. "Well..." He mumbled, "What do you think?"

You paused, "Doesn't matter."

"Does to me. Please, love, it's Eddie again and I don't - "

"All right," you relented, sitting beside him. "My money's on... Something happened, it's just a matter of what, exactly. How about we go to breakfast, see what the energy is there."

"Feels like I can't stomach anything."

"Your mother and father will be upset if we don't go down, c'mon," you whispered, standing, offering your hand. "I'll sit with you, and if you get upset, you can just lean into me, yeah?"

He took your hand, but didn't get up. He just stared at where you were conjoined, rubbing your hand with his thumb. "Does this mean we're fine? That things are... Are things okay between us?"

"Never not been fine, Fi."

"You've avoided me since we got here."

"I've been dealing with shit - "

"That you won't tell me about," he scoffed.

"Yeah," you agreed, his eyes shooting up to meet yours, "you're right, I won't tell you 'cause I can't yet. I want answers first... Then we can talk. I've gotta figure this out for myself, Fi."

"Well, I can help, you know?"

"No, you've helped plenty," you alluded. "C'mon, breakfast."

"Fuck's sake," he grumbled, finally standing, but tightening his grip on your hand. You lead the way to the terrace the Cattons decided to dine at that morning, being the last two to arrive.

There were two seats side-by-side.

"Good morning," you greeted the family that took you in, Felix silent and angry as he took his seat - but still pulled yours out.

"Morning."

"Good morning, darlings," Elspeth breathed from the head of the table.

"You sleep well?" Ollie asked as Felix whipped his cloth napkin to his lap.

"No, not really, mate," he grit, not looking at the boy and instead, reached for your hand. You handed him a cigarette, placing your own between your lips - both forgoing morning meals.

"We're 30 for dinner tomorrow night," Sir James informed the table. "Stopford Sackville has cried off."

"Oh, dear, that's a shame," Elspeth feigned sympathy.

"God, I forgot about fucking dinner," Felix tilted his head back, speaking between his stick as you lit the end of yours - then reaching for his after nudging his bulging bicep to warrant his immediate attention.

"Wait, who is coming to dinner, again?" Farleigh asked.

"The Henrys," Ven reminded.

"No, please!" Farleigh whined quietly.

"Who are the Henrys?" Ollie asked.

"Dad's friends," Ven filled in, Felix glaring at you as you laced your hand with his and squeezed in warning. "They're all called Henry."

"Not all of them," James corrected. "Just most."

"It'll be fun," Elspeth assured.

"It'll be being molested by Henry," Ven continued, swallowing a bite of croissant. "You know which one."

"Oh, I'll put you next to Oliver, then, he can molest you instead," Elspeth quipped, Felix strangling your hand.

"Don't," you whispered, Ollie's head cocking at Ven in an unspoken conversation. She hummed an amused chuckle. Felix glared at them both before looking back at you, silently begging you to let him snap. "Not right now, please, just breathe," you whispered in his ear, ensuring none others heard you.

"Oh, Oliver, I was going to say, we should do something fun for your birthday. Y/N's is at the end of the summer, we can combine efforts! A proper party! No Henrys, something actually fun. What do you think, darling?"

"Mum, you know Y/N doesn't celebrate anymore," Felix seethed with offense.

"Oh, I know, but it might be fun - a combination party?" She offered. "Darling?"

"If Oliver and Y/N would like it, I think it's a splendid idea," James agreed with his wife.

"I think Oliver looks like he'd rather throw himself out of a window," Farleigh chimed, everyone knowing to avoid asking you your thoughts since you couldn't celebrate without your parents - it just felt wrong. Like a betrayal. So, you no longer celebrated the day of your birth, but the Cattons looked for any reason to throw a party.

"What kind of party?" Oliver asked Elspeth.

"I don't know, whatever you want!" She insisted. "What do you think? About 100 people?"

"A hundred?"

"Or two! It invariably ends up being two, doesn't it, with this sort of thing?" She asked her husband, who hummed in amusement. She told Ollie, "Invite whoever you want. All your friends."

"What friends?" Farleigh leered.

"Oh! Oh!" James folded his paper messily in excitement, jumping to attention, "How about fancy dress?"

Ollie reached over and nudged Felix in curiosity, picking up on his angry demeanor. Your best mate looked down at you, making you lean your chin on his shoulder. "Oh, yes!" Mrs. Catton agreed.

"I can wear my suit of armor, Elspeth!" James giddily exclaimed with a childlike grin that made your heart weep gently.

"Good idea, darling," she agreed as Venetia stood hastily from the table; all knowing where she was going, and what she was going to do. "We could have a theme!" She distracted, you watching Venetia and knowing you needed to follow. She'd been caring for you in your illness, you could at least hold her hair back, too. "What about Midsummer Night's Dream?" Elspeth looked around for opinions.

"Lovely," James prasied.

"Bring on the slutty fairies," Farleigh mused.

"Awh, lovie, you'll still be the sluttiest fairy, don't worry," you teased, glancing back again and seeing Venetia escape inside.

"You wanna match my sluttiness?" He asked you.

"As if that was ever in question," you shot back, Felix offering you a small look. "I'll be right back," you excused yourself, standing from your seat but bending at the waist. You whispered in Felix's ear, "I've gotta go, 'M sorry, just keep calm, love. You're all right."

"Find me later," he requested, holding your hand a moment longer before letting you escape.

"So," James grinned as you walked away, leaning in towards his son, "how are things with you two?"

"Yes, darling, you two seem better! Did you finally tell her how you feel?" Elspeth asked.

If Felix was surprised by his parents knowledge, he didn't show; instead scoffing lightly, "Yeah, right..."

"Oh, darling - "

"She doesn't feel the same, Mum," he refused, sighing deeply - making Oliver's stomach coil. "Just leave it, all right? We're just friends, only ever gonna be just friends - she's part of the family. No need to mess all that up."

Farleigh smirked subtly and took a drag from his cigarette.

While hosting the Henrys for dinner, you felt another tide turn while sitting amongst the rich and fabulous. You knew them all, of course, grew up knowing them and attending these dinners with your parents. But something was amiss, something churned your stomach and clenched your heart.

You felt your chest tickle and tighten, the desperate need to cough nearly strangling you; Oliver paying close attention to your struggle from beside Felix. You coughed unexpectedly, seeing blood splatter onto your plate and without a single person noticing, you got up, excused yourself, and rushed from the dinner table with a hand over your mouth. Duncan swiftly cleared your place setting.

"Hear that, love?" Felix turned to look at you, only finding an empty seat. He looked around in case you were mingling, not spying you, and slowly got to his feet.

"Where are you going, darling?" James asked, "Sit, sit - "

"I'm only going to check on Y/N," he explained.

"No, no, sit, sit, sit, we know she's been fighting her stomach all summer," James waved off, and slowly, Felix went against his instinct and sat down. Venetia felt her heart steel in annoyance, wishing her brother would just wake up and realize what was happening.

When Oliver caught Venetia's eye, she questioned, "Felix warned you off, then?"

"Well, maybe we just need to be a bit more careful," he hushed.

"No, thanks," Ven refused, not one to sneak around her own home to satisfy her brother's jealously and possessiveness. "It's just sooooo disappointing," she snipped. "You're just another one of his toys."

"Like Y/N?"

"Y/N's not a toy," she barked.

"You're upset," Oliver noted.

"Oh, don't worry, I'm used to it - honestly. I mean, he never liked sharing his toys. Even the ones he doesn't want to play with anymore."

Oliver cocked his head, wondering, "Well, he's kept Y/N around this long."

"Y/N isn't a toy, Oliver, not to Felix, not to this family," she sneered in anger. "And he won't ever grow tired of her, she doesn't hold a temporary position in his life - unlike most." She chuckled dryly, "Honestly, do you not get it by now? She's the gatekeeper, and you're just a passing interest. You won't ever truly be his because she already is, and there's no replacing Y/N L/N - not to Felix, not in this lifetime." She offered a fake smile and turned from him to face her left, distracted by one of the Henrys.

Oliver knew all that, and he was working on removing you from the portrait - but it seemed, maybe he didn't have to work too hard. A rare disease had infected you the moment Oliver Quick laid eyes on Felix Catton - eating away at you internally, making you lose interest in yourself, plaguing you with self doubt to the point you couldn't look in a mirror without seeing a stranger. When Oliver decided to act against the pretty, rich boy, he started a chain of events that lead here: him, in a tux, at a dinner party, and you, shattering the frail skin on your knees from how hard you dropped to them - spewing blood, wine, and sunflower blossoms.

You choked harshly, make up ruined from your blood, sweat, and tears; hacking out most of a put-together flower. Your throat was shredded, dripping blood down into your lungs to slowly fill them again - floral growth breaking the barrier of your organs, sending unimaginable pain through your body.

You heard the karaoke begin, heaving over the sounds of drunken antics. You slowly crawled out of the bathroom, sniffling as you used your bed to lift your fragile body to your feet only to strip from your gown and crash into bed. Weakness invaded your muscles, exhaustion coated your bones, and your eyes stung with the endless supply of tears that would stain your cheeks.

Morning came far too quickly, and with it, Farleigh's forced departure from Saltburn. You were all dreadfully confused, Venetia explaining he'd been caught nicking items from around the house to sell for a profit - perhaps feeling desperate, wanting to help his mother without needing to ask for the help.

You weren't sure what to say to the situation, so you said nothing, but felt desperate to scream for your own help at the top of your lungs. The closer Ollie's birthday drew, the more you bent over the toilet, the more blooms that tore from your lungs and esophagus. You were at a loss over what to do, fearing you were too late for a doctor, and on the hottest day of the year, while everyone was outside by the water, you were inside, scouring the vast and random library.

"Miss," Duncan leered from behind you, no longer causing fright. "Is there something I can help you locate?"

"No, I'm just doin' some more research, Duncan, thank you, though."

"On what's wrong, Miss?"

"Yeah," you frowned, storing another book. "Nothing answers my questions, nothing explains this condition."

"Hm," he considered, "may I?"

"Please," you gestured him forward, watching in mild curiosity as he moved the ladder, ascended, looked over the spines of the many books and then made his selection.

"I've read every book in this library, and think this might help," He explained, handing you the dark green book about Japanese lore and watching you instantly finger through it.

You eyed him for a moment, asking, "You haven't told them, have you?"

"I found your request for privacy reasonable," he nodded, "and have not told the masters of the house."

You nodded, breathing in relief. "I promise, I'll tell them soon - when I figure this out."

"I think you already have," he mentioned, glancing at the open book in your hands. When you looked down, you had paused on a page titled: Hanahaki Disease.

The chapter was filled with detailed accounts of previous patients and sufferers; all giving a recollection of their battle with the unknown illness. You looked up at Duncan in shock, rereading the passage that told you what you needed to know:

"Hanahaki Disease can be fatal by making the infected vomit flora; either just petals or full blooms. There are three known variations of the disease, but all are caused by unrequited love - making the process often long, drawn out, and incredibly painful. The first variation involves the infected confessing their love to their desired, and that love being returned. This is the cleanest way to cure Hanahaki Disease. The second variation includes the desired not returning the known affection, leaving the infected to undergo surgery, a viable but messy recovery. The operation removes the plants growing in the lungs, but in turn, also removes all known traces and memory of the desired - but it does result in the infected being cured. The third and final variation is the worst, where the infected confesses, the desired does not return any affection or want, and leaves them to suffer until the bitter, bloody end. Without care or caution, this disease can become unmanageable with common side effects including but not limited to: blood loss, weight loss, avoidance, isolation, fear of food, fear of living, fear of affection, miscommunication, blood from other bodily orifices, and uncontrollable depression, anxiety, and other mental afflictions. Most infected never fully recover from the aftermath of this disease, and even when their love is returned, they are often haunted by the damaging effects of unrequited love."

You stared at the passage in shock, looking up slowly to spy Duncan staring at you in pity.

"I had a companion like you are to Mr. Felix, once," he confessed. "I was dedicated to my job, loyal to the Cattons, and in turn, he suffered greatly because I couldn't love him how he deserved." Duncan blinked at you twice in the silence that stretched between you. "My advice, Miss? Do not wait - you should come clean to Mr. Felix, let him decide how he feels, and should he not return your affection, I will take you personally to the hospital, where you might choose to undergo the procedure."

"And lose all memory of Felix? Of the Cattons? Of Saltburn?" You asked in desperation, tears swelling in your sunken eyes. "Not likely, Duncan, they're my family. I couldn't bear to forget them, even if it means I should live - I wouldn't be alive anymore. Not without him, not without this family that took me in without a moment's hesitation. I'd lose myself."

"But you'd have the chance to discover something new," he argued gently. "You have your own decisions to make, Miss, but I can only tell you my deepest regret was being so far up Sir James' arse that I missed the life that passed me by. And now," he sighed, "I live with the fact that I condemned my beautiful Roger."

"I'm sorry for your loss, Duncan..."

"I do not wish to see you suffer more than you have been," he frowned. "But I understand the fear you have, emotions are terrifying, especially for the young. But love is not conditional, Miss... Remember that. And having only a part of Mr. Felix would result in losing yourself entirely, whereas losing a part of him would result in you rediscovering all you are. Just... Just something to think about."

"How did you find this?" You asked softly.

"After Roger, I had no reason to care for much else other than the written accounts of those who passed before me. It felt like I was given a life to live, if only vicariously. I've read them all," he reminded, gesturing to the grand library, "and when I found this, I knew I had my answers. That being afraid costs us more than being brave."

You read the book in its entirety. You soaked in every recorded account.

Duncan's words weighed on your heart, and the last few nights leading up to Oliver's party were spent on bruised knees. Venetia still slept in your room a few nights a week, begging you to seek medical attention, and you promised her, after the party, you'd take action. She didn't need to know you were lying just yet.

But as it seemed, your lies were minuscule in comparison to others.

The day of the party arrived, Felix taking Ollie out for a drive as a birthday present. Where their destination was, you didn't know, you couldn't care, because watching them drive off the property dropped you to the ground as your heart felt as if it were physically shattered. You couldn't breath, the sunflowers strangling you from the inside, and after watching the love of your life drive off with another lad, you felt as if your fate was sealed.

That was it.

He didn't love you, he had Ollie. There was only so much love to be given at a time, and Ollie soaked it all up. You didn't stand a chance, you knew Felix's infatuation was out of control with Ollie's pitiful background piquing his interest. You felt like old news, you felt abandoned, alone, cold, heartless...

"What're you wearing tonight?" Venetia asked, tossing pieces of clothing around. "Felix is wearing these sort of golden wings, want to match?"

"What are you wearing, love? Maybe I'll match with you?"

"No, no," she grinned, "I've just found the perfect outfit for you!"

She squealed in excitement, turning to show you the dress seemingly made out of strips of fabric and a corset; creating an ethereal look and design. The color was pale, moss green with shimmering pale golds and nudes paired amongst the fabric. It created an illusion that the mini dress moved and swished around your thighs, and when she handed you golden gladiator sandals, you were sold.

Venetia spent more time helping you get ready than she did herself. She ensured your hair was pinned off your neck, that your make-up was mystical and covered in glitter, corset cinched at the waist to show your figure, and that you had a smaller pair of golden wings to top off your slutty fairy look.

Farleigh would've been proud.

The dress showed off your back, only thin straps keeping it in place as the wings were small enough that you weren't hidden under them. You showed more skin in that dress than you had all summer, your thinning frame tailored under Venetia's talented fingers.

Her hands clapped when you showed her the final look.

"Love the spider web chain," you complimented, clipped her in.

"Sure?"

"It's a look, Ven, you're stunning," you complimented, smiling at your friend with genuine kindness. "C'mon, I think I can hear people arriving."

Once more, Venetia squealed and snatched your hand, racing from her room and leading you into the party on the grounds as the sun was beginning to set. After greeting Elspeth and Sir James, complimenting their chosen costumes, you were sucked into a night of young debauchery; Venetia pinned to your side.

And thankfully, she was there to witness the moment you gave up. Moving through one of the darkened rooms, you were mingling with old classmates, happy to see familiar, friendly faces, and just as you turned, your glass shattered to the floor with the last bit of your heart and composure.

You saw Felix, clear as day, dancing with none other then fucking India - the girl you felt most in competition with, besides Annabel. He was so close to her, they were practically fucking; seemingly distracted by one another, they didn't even notice the party.

"Oh, love," Ven turned to you, but you just gave her a pained look.

"I'm gonna go," you rushed.

"No, wait - "

"I need to be alone, Ven," you insisted, the tears starting as your chest felt too tight in the crowded room. "I told you, I fucking told you, he doesn't feel the same," you sniffled, her eyes widening as you felt a familiar metallic taste in your mouth.

When your hand lifted, you smeared blood from your lips and nostrils, blinking in recognition - knowing what was to come next.

"I-I-I have to go, 'M sorry," you rushed, blood oozing and dripping down your neck in artistic scribbles. You didn't bother hiding this time, turning from your fellow drunkards to escape outside - heading for the maze, like you always did when needing to be alone.

Your room wasn't safe, anyone could find you there. The entire home was overrun with party-goers. The grounds surrounding Saltburn unsafe for your breakdown, as well.

So, you raced to the one place you felt safe anymore: the maze.

Your blood stained the shrubbery as you stumbled through it, trying to hold together, but the moment you reached the Minotaur statue, your legs gave up, mud squishing to your knees, and instantly coughing, hacking, and heaving blood from your lungs.

Long, pretty bright yellow sunflower petals came out in an abundance, the most it's ever been, before you were vomiting full blooms again.

You felt woozy, dizzy... Less than human.

You just wanted it to stop.

When you left Venetia's side, she noted you beelining outside and knew immediately where you had run off to. In unfiltered anger, she turned and shoved through the crowd up to her brother, grabbed him by the strap of his wife beater, and yanked him after her.

"Oi! Hey, hey, hey, Venetia! What the fuck are you doing!?"

"You've fucked up!" She raged, ignoring the looks from others and lead him outside so they could hear each other.

"Are you out of your mind?" He demanded.

"Are you!?" She sneered. "The fuck are you doing!?"

"What?" He scoffed, "What am I doing wrong, dancing at our party? Hmm?"

"With that skank!?"

"Hey!" India barked, having followed them outside.

"This doesn't concern you!" Ven barked, Felix feeling on-edge with his sister so enraged.

"You're talkin' about me, I think it does!"

"Ven, what the hell's gotten into you - "

"It's about Y/N!"

Felix froze for a moment, then looked at India, "Go inside."

"What!?"

"Piss off, India! She's right, this doesn't concern you!" He snapped, the girl scurrying away with her tail tucked firmly between her legs. When Felix looked at his sister, he demanded in a rush, "What about Y/N? Where even is she - "

"I promised her I wouldn't intervene, I swore I wouldn't say anything - especially to you, but you're such a fucking idiot, if you're not fed anything, you don't get it!"

"Is this really the time to insult me?"

She glared, steeling her jaw and gritting, "Y/N's in the maze."

"Okay? She goes there - "

"No, listen to me," Ven sneered. "She's been in love with you, Farleigh and I both figured it out - but it was really fucking obvious."

Felix blanched in shock, "What?"

"She's in love with you, you fucking idiot! She's been sick the whole summer because you can't love her back!"

"How - what are you on about!?"

"She's been throwing up blood, you're honestly killing her by doing what you're doing with all these girls! By ignoring whatever you feel - by denying it repeatedly! It's not fair! All she's done is love and support you, care for you, protect you, and you're fucking killing her!"

He blinked, "She loves me?"

"Yes, you fucking imbecile! And tonight was her last straw, I fucking saw it! She lives here, you jagoff, and you're dancing with India - right in front of Y/N? In her own home? Where she's supposed to be safe!?"

"I-I didn't - I didn't know!"

"No shit, because you're both fucking idiots who talk about everything except your feelings! Do better, Felix! Now, go! She needs you to be a fucking man - go! She needs you, Felix, she's in the maze, don't fuck this up more than you have!"

He didn't hesitate to shoot off in the direction of the maze, Farleigh catching sight and pushing his brows together before realizing he was sprinting after you - I mean, who else would Felix move that fast for? Into the maze Felix went, and Farleigh knew, everything was about to change. Elspeth and Sir James didn't notice a thing, too distracted by their party, but there was another watching; a set of dead, ghostly blue eyes nearly glowing in the night as they locked onto their prey fleeing the party.

Felix sprinted his way through the maze, an expert at navigating, and when he made it to the center, his own heart constricted to a suffocating depth.

"Oh, my girl," he rushed to your side, getting on his knees and holding your weakening body as crimson dribbled from your mouth. The pool of blood was grand enough that he worried how you'd make it through the night; floating sunflowers a hauntingly beautiful sight in the dead of night. "Hey, hey, you're okay, you're all right, I got you - I'm here," he whispered, smoothing hair from your face. "It's me, it's your Felix, love, just focus on me, yeah?"

And finally, with a sniffle that did little to nothing, you looked into his eyes with yours rimmed in red. "Fi..."

"Don't talk, save your energy, I'm gonna get you somewhere safe - "

"I've gotta tell you something."

"Tell me after we get to your room, yeah?"

Your head shook, "If I wait longer, it'll get worse."

"Sweetheart, please - "

"I'm in love with you," you finally confessed to him, unable to look him in the eyes for a second longer. You stared at your demise, blood soaking into both your knees. "Have been, I think, since I moved in here," you whimpered, "and after my parents died, I fell so fucking in love with you that it hurt. But out of fear of losing this friendship, I couldn't - I couldn't tell you. And now, it's killing me, but you deserve to know: I'm so fucking in love with you, makes me physically ill. I-I can't do this anymore, Fi, I just can't - the pain is too much and I've already lost so much - "

"Felix?" Ollie called in a drunken whine, entering the center.

"Oh, Jesus Christ, man!" Felix snapped, whipping around to glare at Ollie as you folded into his chest out of sheer pain. Of course, in the midst of your confession, nobody but Oliver fucking Quick would show up. "Get out of here! Now, Ollie, I'm not fucking joking!"

"Is she all right?" He asked, stumbling a bit.

"What the fuck are you still doing here!? Get out, fucking go, this doesn't concern you!"

"We need to talk, I need to talk to you!"

"It's fine, talk t'him," you wheezed, trying to get to your feet, but failing out of sheer weakness.

"No, you need to fucking go, Ollie! Now! Y/N and I need to talk a helluva lot more than we do!"

You used his shoulders to stand, "Talk t'him, Fi, don't let this shit happen t'someone else." He glanced to your blood as you let go of him, stumbling just out of reach, towards one of the maze exits.

"We need to talk, Felix!" Ollie demanded as you slipped out of sight.

"No, you know what? Fuck you!" He barked. "You're not what's important right now, Ollie! For fuck's sake!"

"Don't go after her," Ollie sneered, stepping in Felix's way when he climbed to his feet and meant to go after you.

"Fuck is wrong with you, mate!?" Felix raged, shoving Ollie back several steps. "Hey? So fucked in the head, you think you take precedence over my girl?"

"Y-Your girl?"

"Fucking Y/N!" He shouted. "Yes! My fucking girl, that I was so blinded by you to fucking see what was wrong! Now fuck off!"

"She's nothing - "

"SHE'S FUCKING EVERYTHING!" Felix shouted, you pausing in the maze when you heard it. "You and I can talk later, if I even fucking want to, but right now, my girl needs me - not fucking you!"

"I see she's got you so blinded - "

"You think Y/N's the problem here?" Felix sneered, getting in Ollie's face; fisting the lapels of his blazer. "Huh? You blaming her?"

"No, just saying - "

"All the wrong fucking things," Felix shoved him back again. "She's all that fucking matters to me!" He shouted again, you slowly nearing the entrance into the center of the maze, remaining hidden behind a shrub. "Not you, not all your lies - but her! It's always been her, but you fucking knew that, didn't you!? You saw what we were, what we had, what we could've been, what we were dancing around, and just had to wedge yourself between us, yeah? I didn't see it before, but your fucking lies - all your fucking lies, you were trying to ruin the best thing in my life! And you might've just succeeded!"

"She doesn't deserve you! None of them do!"

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Oliver!?" Felix cried, "Leave me the fuck alone! Leave us the fuck alone! Leave my family the fuck alone! Christ! Please, stop!"

"We need to talk!" Ollie now approached Felix, making him back up into the statue.

"We can't - we can't, are you fucking crazy? Haven't you ruined enough!?"

"Me!?" He snarled. "I didn't ruin shit, it was her! It was all her, don't you see? You pitied us against each other, I had to do this! For you! You can't just throw me away!"

Felix lost his temper, shoving Oliver again, "Get the fuck away from me! I can! I can and I will throw you away - for her! I'd do anything for her, don't you fucking get that!? I didn't see before, but now I do, the slimy, scum you are - and I'd throw you away a hundred times if it meant being with her! Fuck out of here, leave us alone!"

Oliver shouted as he grabbed Felix's shirt, "Look, I just gave you what you wanted!" His voice lowered to a quiver, "Like everyone else does. Everyone puts on a show for Felix! So, I'm sorry that my - m-m-my performance wasn't good enough, like Y/N's always is."

You crept from the shadows, neither lad noticing; intrigued by the words being slurred, shouted, and weaponized.

"I think... I think you need to see somebody," Felix whispered, not willing to admit aloud that Oliver was scaring him. "You need help, okay? Seriously."

"No. No, I don't," Ollie sneered - sounding almost sober. "I just need you to understand how much I fucking love you."

And there it was - another confession. Your heart (or whatever was left of it) felt heavy, like it was being constricted and anchored to your feet.

Felix whispered, "I love Y/N, mate, you have to know - wasn't exactly a huge secret, except to us. To her and I, not you and I, Ollie."

You felt something akin to shock spark in your gut, blooming an unknown warmth through your body.

Oliver begged, "You're the only friend I ever had, Felix." His thumbs pet Felix's face despite him trying to wriggle away; being touched by the psychotic liar terrifying him - but no more than the feeling of dread he had watching you stumble away. "Okay... I mean, doesn't this just prove how much - how much of a good friend I actually am? How well I actually know you? I'm still the same person! Yeah?" He whimpered, "I'm still the same person."

"I don't know what you are," Felix whispered in reply. "But I do know you," he paused, confessing, "you make my fucking blood run cold." His head shook, "I know friendship - and it's not this, Ollie, it's not built on lies and deception. Y/N? She's everything to me, mate, and you tried to ruin that. You're a fucking liar, Ollie."

He gagged a little, releasing Felix to stare at him with a sense of defeat. Oliver gagged again, shoving the opened champagne to Felix's chest, muttering, "Wait there a sec," before stepping away to throw up on the opposite side of the statue. He knew the other boy wouldn't be able to resist an open bottle of alcohol.

However, Felix felt it was his opening to escape, and when he looked up, he caught sight of you.

Your finger rose to your lips in a silencing motion, glancing at a puking Oliver, and Felix didn't hesitate to drop the bottle and race for you. When his hands smoothed over either of your cheeks, he checked behind him - seeing Ollie still at a distance - stooping to scoop you in his arms, whispering, "We have to go, love, fucking now."

You agreed and let him rush away into the maze, and before you could exit, Oliver was heard bellowing, "FELIX!"

"What the fuck was all that?" You asked, hiding yourself in his neck; neither caring for the blood being stained.

"I'll explain everything in a minute, love, let me get you somewhere safe," he rushed, the party sounding around you once more. He deflected anyone who got in the way, shoulders bullying past people, ignoring his name being cried out. Up the stairs, down a hall or two, and he was rounding into your room. "All right, hang on," he deposited you on your bed, rushing into your restroom and locking all the doors except the one connecting your room. The main door was also locked.

"What's going on?" You asked.

"He's a liar," Felix panted, wrangling from his wings as he approached you. "But it doesn't matter right now - what matters is our truth. You were interrupted before, but I have to tell you, sweetheart, that your affection isn't one-sided. Okay?" He knelt before you, taking both cheeks in hand. "You're not alone in this, I-I should've told you so much sooner, but I love you, too. No, no, I'm - I'm in love with you and I'm so sorry I didn't say it. Hear me? I'm in love with you, Y/N, I'm so sorry I was selfish, that I didn't see the pain you were in that I was causing."

"Wasn't your fault," you whispered.

"It's all my fault."

"I should've said something, too."

"You're the one who's been suffering all this time, this is on me. Okay?" His head shook, wiping the streams of blood from your nose and lips. "You're a fucking wreck, darling, should've said something so much sooner - saved you from all this pain."

"I was afraid, and didn't want you to know."

"I made you feel as if you couldn't talk to me," his head shook. "Listen to me, I-I have to go warn Mum and Dad about Oliver, but you stay here - "

"You're not leaving," you insisted. "Call Venetia's cell or Farleigh's, tell them whatever you're worried about, and stay here, with me, where you're safe. I don't know what I heard, but I don't think Ollie's well in the head and he's gonna gun for you."

He sighed, "They won't answer. The party's - "

"Just try..."

He agreed and grabbed his cell phone from his pocket, dialing his sister as he got you a wet cloth. She answered when he was knelt in front of you again, wiping the remnants of your near-death experience from your face as he explained at a rapid speed a condensed version of events.

When Venetia assured she would tell Elspeth and James, he hung up and brought you in for a tight hug. "Should've told you," he whispered, "I'm so sorry."

"I am, too," you whimpered, holding onto his neck tightly.

"C'mon," he sighed, pulling back to gaze at you, "let's get you changed and in bed - 's been a fucking nightmare tonight."

"How fitting."

"How so?"

You half-smirked, "A Midsummer Nightmare's Dream, innit?" He matched your fleeting amusement.

That night, you and Felix slept beside each other in a secure and locked room; both unconscious when Oliver approached your door and tried to get in before being apprehended by two footmen. He was locked in the basement for the night, given the chance to sober up before morning, when the police would be phoned.

When the sun broke the horizon, Felix woke with a start. You were already awake, looking up at his pale face, begging him to tell you the truth behind Oliver. He looked as if he would be sick, giving you a detailed summary of what happened the day before - all the lies Ollie told, how his parents were alive, well, and very kind. How nothing he's told Felix was true - all some form of fucked up lie to make him seem more broken for Felix's endearment.

"Am I that bad, love?" He asked in a hushed tone.

"No, you're just... You just have an affinity for broken things," you answered. "And he gave you what you wanted, tenfold."

"I feel so stupid."

"For being kind?" You shook your head, caressing his cheek.

"Not very kind t'let you suffer in silence, was it?"

"You couldn't have known how bad it all was, I wasn't exactly truthful either."

"You protected yourself, while Ollie... Ollie put on a fucking show to get attention, to seem so different, make me feel like I'd be a fool to ignore him," he scoffed. "I'm so sorry, love," he whispered, resting his forehead against yours. "But I meant what I said - you're fucking everything to me and I'd throw everyone away if it meant being with you - keeping you."

It felt so good to assure him, "You have me, Felix. 'M not goin' anywhere."

He smiled gently, sighing in relief, asking, "Can I kiss you now? Please, love, think we've waited plenty long enough."

You didn't answer, you only lifted you lips to his and sealed your fate - meshing into one heart, soul, and one being. Two halves, made whole; cut from the same cloth and stitched together. His tongue swept across the seam of your lips, mingling with yours and never knowing when he had felt so complete while kissing a woman.

Because he hadn't. Everyone else before you was a place holder, temporary, a fleeting interest. You were a part of him, never wanting to experience life without the other, but as the house slowly woke up, you were both reminded of reality...

There was still a madman to be dealt with, and Felix wanted a front row viewing to ensure Oliver Quick was truly gone and your lives in a relationship could finally start.

requesting rules and masterlist

Saltburn masterlist

other Hanahaki Disease fics:

featuring: Eddie Munson from Stranger Things

Cherry Blossom Colored Kisses

Tears in the Rain

Gone with the Sin

#felix catton #fix it felix #felix catton x reader #felix catton x fem! reader #felix catton x you #felix catton x y/n #felix catton fluff #felix catton hurt and comfort #felix catton angst #felix catton fanfiction #felix catton imagine #felix catton saltburn #felix saltburn #saltburn felix #saltburn felix catton #saltburn #saltburn movie #saltburn 2023 #saltburn fanfiction #saltburn imagine #saltburn x reader #saltburn x you #anti oliver quick #jacob elordi character