#because uff da | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

celibibratty · 2 years

Text

Okayy, episode 4, how do I start?, it was 2019 (22/08), the day was very sunny, I remember Marina and I leaving school super excited to get home to watch ep 4, this episode was the first episode we watched together, hmph, the episode already started with the first disappointment, this shitty sean's wolf bros story, my anger had increased by 10% just on that, because as I say in my episode 3 post, sean just talks bullshit in this shit in ep 4, and to make it worse the gameplay we watched the person had done the fucking cassidy route (everyone did😒), urgh, i got furious, sean there saying that "hooked up" with cassidy so proudlyy (you motherfucker, are you not feeling guilty?, you hooking up with this "girl" was literally the reason your brother disappeared💢), wow, I already hated this intro/shitty story, but ep 4 only made me dislike it even more, I think I still have rancid because of it😞,anyway, the episode started well (well shit), this sequence of the hospital, aff, bullshit after bullshit, which thing that PISSED ME OFF!!!, so wasted potential, first, sean doesn't talk shit! (don't talk about daniel shoot, don't worry about daniel, don't feel guilty, don't talk about ep3 mess), in the trailer it gives an idea that sean feels guilty for what he did (which he should💢), but no, he doesn't talk shit, and to make it worse when you do the romances, he fantasizes/thinks about finn and cassidy!! (helloo, it's no time to think about romance💢🔥, your little brother is missing!!! and it's your fault!), I controlled myself, I was a beast inside, but I said to myself "calm down, calm down, it's just the beginning yet, probably at the end it will talk about ep3 mess😤", second, the sketchbook scene, this scene is such a wasted potential, I always imagined/expected a scenario where sean would look at his sketchbook, but I imagined that he would look to remember daniel, remember that now he is not with him anymore, because he fucked up too much💢, but no, he looks at the sketchbook to try to guess where daniel could be (yeah, yeah, daniel would be totally able to go back to one of the places they passed😒, sean are you goofy or something?), I had found this scene ridiculous, my anger thermometer was only increasing, okay, what else, then we have the scene of sean's dream with his father, another scene that made me angry, hmph, sean having a happy dream being that his brother was consider missing until a few months ago💢, we have the dudes scene, the first time I saw this scene I was super tense💦, and look that the gameplay that we watched the person had made the version that nothing happens (sean obeys everything), nowadays I see this version I think it's very okay to watch, even a little dull😅, ha-ha, I remember me and Marina getting a fright with Sean's scream😂, I think it was Marina who got scared the most, she even said something like "gee, don't scary me like that, sean😅", first time i saw sarah-lee i swore she was daniel, i only stopped believing when daniel showed up😅💦, i loved lisbeth at first look (i think she's funny), i just heard "can i have a Hallelujah", boom, I already liked her, but as expected I thought "i think she'll be the villain😈", here comes another disappointing scene...

Their reunion!, i expected more!, i thought it sucks this thing of sarah-lee being in the scene/sarah-lee being the one who found sean, so stupid, everything in this scene (their reunion) is stupid, sarah-lee saying that daniel was missing sean (yeah, yeah, he was missing sean so much that he kicked him out at the first moment he could😒), this thing about sarah-lee and lisbeth being in the scene looking at sean and daniel, their conversation, like, the bros didn't see each other for months, daniel was considered missing, the last time they saw each other was in ep3 mess (and depending on the outcome, daniel gets shot and in the other he says some very melancholy things, he says that sean has changed and that he fucks everything up), to get there their conversation IS THIS!💢,"ah, you've grown up, enano😜, really, do i look older?😜, ah, not as much as your haircut😜", screw you!, seriously!!💢, there wasn't even a "are you okay?, i was so worried, i though i lost you or that something bad happened to you", and to make it worse, I had a huge expectation that one of them would talk about ep3 mess, but no, nothing!, but I controlled myself again "calm down, calm down, it must probably refer in the ending", now we arrived at the first trigger scene, I got surprised with sean "beating" lisbeth inside the church, I don't know, I'm not even super religious, but this scene got me a gut feeling, worse is that before lisbeth was kinda saying that sean was a sinner, bad influence, blah, blah, and then to the next scene sean pushes her to a level that she bleeds!! (not that she didn't deserve it, and i know that in the ending she do the same thing), and I understand where Sean's aggression comes from, but I don't know, when I saw it for the first time I get kinda shocked (seems like Lisbeth got a little scared)

argh, here we go, the final scene (sean's "apologize", looks more like sean's excuses), I kind of almost hate this scene😑 (I just like it a little bit because of sean and daniel's expressions, and sometimes cuz sean looks cute/handsome in it💕, ~and sometimes I like to see him getting beaten), I'm not going to lie, the scene of daniel pushing sean impressed me, I had my mouth open when I saw it (this scene is kind of satisfying😈), continuing, this confrontation scene was the last straw, i-got-pissed, sean doesn't say any shit about ep3, the game makes sean talk a lot of things that has nothing to do with it and tries to blame the heist in every way, as if the heist was the cause of it all, the problem is that sean did shit, that's it!, woah, i was pissed because the game didn't solve FUCKING ANYTHING!!! , i didn't get not even a bit happy/reliefed when daniel come back to sean, that "i'm sorry" of daniel sounds so fake to me (no, it's not because of the acting, it's the way of the scene), i can't, it sounds so fake to me , he seems to have his eyes open and this scene just made me even more pissed off💢🔥, why daniel excessivily apologizes in this episode?💢💨, by this point I was already losing my sanity, I was with such an anger, ugh, now we have lisbeth's yes or no death scene, i think it's funny that the first version we saw, daniel didn't even threaten to kill lisbeth (it was the version he just pushes her), but even with this one version when I saw it I was kinda of terrified…funny, well, but the bomb was when I saw the version that he kills, I got terrified, I remember mentally thinking "WHATA HELL!, the old lady believed he was an angel, but he KILLED HER!, what kinda of angel is this?, h-he is not an angel, but if he's not an angel, what is he then? (a devil in disguise), the other thought, ugh, I feel shame for thinking this at the time, it's a very strange thought for someone who liked sean and daniel, i had thought "daniel killed lisbeth without any remorse, even after all she did for him (i know lisbeth used him and blah , blah💢, but she took care of him to a certain extent) huh, if he managed to kill this old lady even tho she didn't do half the things sean did to him, I don't doubt he manage to kill sean too💢🔥", is a very sinister thought for someone who liked sean and daniel, after that i was done, i was not in myself anymore

then there was the last scene(the scene with the music) which by the way I found fuckin creppy!!(still find a little bit), I was terrified, especially when it's the version that daniel kills (but the two versions are weird to me), looks like daniel is smiling, i found this bizarre, i was so terrified by everything that i didnt care about the hug at the end, i didn't even care, because i found this whole scene fuckin weird, it is literally a horror movie scene, daniel there smiling or enjoying seeing the church burning (with lisbeth's body inside) while sean and the mother are distracted, daniel ignores sean in the whole scene to out of nowhere he hugs him (even that hug from them when I saw it at the time I got scared, because Daniel's face is so serious, it looks like a horror movie scene), random detail, but the afternoon was orange when we finished the ep, the day was very similar to the weather of the ending, with the orange sky, kinda funny, I had become a beast, I feel sorry for marina💦, poor thing, she was trying to be more hopeful (but i'm sure that inside she was as angry as i), my energy was super negative/heavy, i just remember me lying in bed complaining to marina and me saying "WHAT FUCK OF EPISODE WAS THAT?💢🔥", I was super dizzy, my head was hurting a lot, I wanted to sleep, I felt super sick/drained at the end of the day, I was disappointed with this episode, I thought sean and daniel were nasty, episode crazy as fuck, i got embarrassed because i just saw everyone saying that they cried with this episode, that sean and daniel are so precious😭❤, and I someone who also liked sean and daniel i didn't felt any of that, ep4 was an episode that almost made me want to quit this game, i was terrified with sean and daniel, i got stunned with this game for a time, i just got back to normal/got more okay because of an image that marina had drawn of this hug from the ending, I thought the image was cute, so with that I was like "(sigh)maybe it's not that bad💨🌸", and with that I decided to stay enduring this shitty game😊🌸💕

#Uff that was intense💦crazy i wasn't not even angry when i tried to write that #but just for the fact i was absorving this day energy i was starting to get very angry as the same way i was in the day #lis2 discussion #I find myself kinda crazy because ep 4 is the ep that i draw the most but this episode was the episode that destroyed me #Yeah yeah i like the white crazy lady😈😂#Eu tava louca pra revelar isso😂#But i know lisbeth is bad/evil #Uau com certeza eu consigo escrever um texto de 1.000 ou mais caracteres #Look at this!! It's huge #Será que alguem vai ter paciência para ler tudo?😞bom eu tenho😎✨#(Sigh) o texto terminou até meio bunitinho com eu falando que a imagem da marina foi oque me fez querer continuar com esse jogo🌸#poor ana little did she know that this was just the beginning

2 notes · View notes

thepoopdokyeomtouched · 2 months

Note

HI!!!!

dude sajda karaan>>>

ik this is random but there's only so many desi blogs on tumblr and you seem like a really cool person idk

BRO WHAT OTHER BOLLYWOOD SONGS DO YOU LIKE BECAUSE YK THE 2000S SONGS LIKE DESI GIRL, BREAK UP SONG, MAKE SOME NOISE FOR THE DESI BOYZ ALL HIT SO HARD

(this is my somewhat subtle way of asking if you wanna be moots?)

OH DAMN WE ARE GOING THERE!?! Ok lets get in it

Starting of from old bollywood

Maine poocha chand se

Bahon mai chale aao

Chura liya hai

Aaj mausam

Lag ja gale

Pehla nasha

These are my favorite 90's songs 😭

Then 2000's

Piyu bole

Tu hi re

My dil goes hmm

👏🏻RHTDM👏🏻 THE WHOLE ALBUM IS MY SOUL EVEN THE RAIN SCENE FLUTE TUNES 😭😭😩😩😩💗💗💗💗

Suno na suno na

Main yahi hoon

Hosh walon ko khabar kya 😩🤌🏻

Kabhi khushi kabhi gam, the whole album 🤭💗

Falak tak

Lazy lamhe, ab to forever, hey shona, ladki kyu, chhalka, saathiyaan, chupke se 😭🤭💗

----NOW THE GOLDEN ERA OF BOLLYWOOD---

Starting with kk's songs : Tu hi meri shab hai, soniye, abhi abhi, beetain lamhe, dil ibaadat, kya mujhe pyaar hai, labon ko, tujhe sochta hoon, zara sa, haan tu hai, oh meri jaan, mat aazma , humko pyaar hua and more ☝🤓

Then Mohit chauhan : the whole ROCKSTAR album like hello?!?! Tujhe bhula diya , masakali, kuch khaas hai, khoya khoya, rabba, IS THIS LOVE, DOORIYAAN, bheegi si bhaagi si, abhi kuch dino se, TUMSE HI, tune jo na kaha and my ultimate fav PEE LOON

My fav artist kk, mohit chauhan, javed ali, sonu nigam, shreya ghoshal, monali thankur, nikita gandhi, sunidhi chauhan , MITRAZ, Vilen, darshan raval, arijit singh, jubin nautyal, asees kaur, shaan, neeti mohan, armaan malik, pritam, vishal shakher, ar rehman, ayushmaan khurana and so many more

Then all emraan haashmi songs 😭 pee loon, tuhi mera, hosaana, tum mile(the whole album 🔥) saibo, I hate love stories (whole album), ek break ke baad, uff teri aadat, hey yeah, tum tak, ranjhaana, rishte naate, paani da rang , soniyo(raaz), AASHIQI 2 WHOLE ALBUM 😩, tera hone laga tu, aajao tamanna, ek din teri raahon mai, hum tum, tere liye(prince), o bekhabar,, sawar loon, JAB TAK HAI JAAN 👺, allah maaf kare, rabba mai to marr gaya oye, mera mann, mann mera, baatein kuch ankahi si, tera chehra(adnan sami), MAULA MERE MAULA, deewana kar raha hai, oh my love, khyaalon mai, guzarish, tose naina, raabta, chori kya re, dagabaaz re, sanam re, gazab ka hai ye din, moh moh ke dhaage, ishq risk, ANJANA ANJAANI(THE WHOLE ALBUM ⚰️, ye tune kya kiya, halka halka, tere naina, ishq bulawa, THE BEST IKTARA, KYA KAROON, WAKE UP SID.

I have a whole sensual playlist romantic, sad, dance, I'M CRAZY ABOUT IT 😩😩😩😩

Even pops like "blam the nights, oh gujariyan, subha hone na de, lat lag gai, lucky boy(bachna ae haseeno is also a DOPE ALBUM🔥😩) , ladies vs ricky bahl, baand baja barat's ayyvien ayyvein, dum dum, aadha ishq, aa zara and so many 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

And OF COURSE WE ARE FRIENDS NOW (moot is so weird for a hindi speaker me yk🤓)

#if you ever need my playlist #ask for it cuz i feel wegot same vibes 👀

33 notes · View notes

sigelfire · 6 months

Text

#SOYCOMOQUIEROSER: DIEGO LUNA

Checa todas las confesiones que nos hizo el actor

Revista moi - 2018

1. ¿Qué película y qué libro recomiendas? Pues llevo un rato viendo puras películas infantiles, jajaja, pero recomendaría Captain Fantastic y el libro Canción de tumba, de Julián Herbert.

2. ¿Para qué eres buenazo, que sea diferente a lo que te dedicas? Pues, me gusta mucho cocinar y es algo a lo que le dedico mucho tiempo, pero tengo bastante que aprender.

3. ¿Qué es lo que más te ha costado aprender en la vida? A decir que no. Muchas veces me hallo en situaciones que digo, “qué fácil hubiera sido decir que no desde el principio”, y termino siempre siendo un facilote. Mis amigos dicen que tengo el “no” fracturado.

4. El taco perfecto es… ¡Uff! El que es con tortilla hecha a mano, porque lo que trae adentro, pues no voy a escoger, si la maravilla es que tenemos tanta diversidad; pero si la tortilla está hecha a mano, siempre es mejor.

5. ¿Cuántas veces te han roto el corazón? Uuuy, varias. Una bien, porque ya después uno aprende. Pero esa sí en cachitos, como las copas de vidrio muy finito. Es un rico ejercicio aventarse, atreverse, no entrarle con miedo.

6. ¿Aprendiste algo? Que en las relaciones hay una cosa maravillosa y mágica que cuando las cosas se dan, parece que es por arte de magia; pero si intentas, luchas y te aferras, el final siempre es catastrófico. Yo me aferré mucho tiempo y pagué las consecuencias.

7. ¿A qué huele tu coche? Depende, jajaja. La semana que mis hijos están conmigo, a una cosa que se llama slime, que los trae vueltos locos, que huele como a detergente y pegamento espantoso. Entonces, a eso huele una semana sí y una no.

8. ¿Qué defecto te quitarías? Varios, varios. Sobre todo en mi trabajo, soy muy controlador, muy aprensivo, me gustaría saber soltar. Pero tengo muchos otros defectos.

9. Superhéroe favorito: Deadpool

10. ¿Qué reglas siempre desobedecen tus hijos? Mmm, no despertarme en la mañana cuando tengo llamado nocturno.

11. Grosería favorita: Las uso casi todas, jajaja, no tengo preferencia. Pero la que más uso sería… pinche.

12. Tu peor hábito: Fumar. Es algo que quiero dejar pronto, aunque todavía no me he atrevido a hacerlo, y comer mucho, soy un glotón.

13. ¿En qué eres épicamente malo? En el karaoke. No se me da. No es la cantada, ya hasta en una película canté, solo me da un pánico escénico impresionante. Es un tema de exposición, de vulnerabilidad. Casi nada me da pena, pero cantar en un karaoke ni muy borracho lo hago con seguridad.

14. ¿Qué pregunta te choca que te hagan? Si estoy saliendo con alguien o no. Más porque cada vez se ponen más ingeniosos en la forma en la que preguntan. Pareciera que tiene que ver con otra cosa y, de repente, dices, ¡ay, cabrón! Si contesto eso estoy diciendo si tengo novia o no. Digo, no es tan grave tampoco.

15. Tu peor miedo: No poder estar ahí acompañando a mis hijos en ese proceso de entender este lugar en el que viven y crecen. A no estar presente. Yo no tenía ese miedo hasta que nacieron.

16. ¿Qué le deseas a México? Empatía, paz y conciliación entre los ciudadanos.

--------------

English translation:

#I AM AS I WANNA BE: DIEGO LUNA

Check all the confessions that the actor made to us

Moi Mag - 2018

1. What film and what book do you recommend? Well, I've been watching only children's movies for a while, hahahah, but I would recommend Captain Fantastic and the book Tomb Song, by Julián Herbert.

2. What are you good fot, that is different to what you do? Well, I love cooking and it's something I dedicate a lot of time to, but I have a lot to learn.

3. What has been the most difficult thing for you to learn in life? Saying no. Many times I find myself in situations where I say, “how easy it would have been to say no from the beginning,” and I always end up being a pushover. My friends say that my “no” is fractured.

4. The perfect taco is… Phew! The one with a handmade tortilla, because what's inside, well, I'm not going to choose, cause the wonder is that we have so much diversity; but if the tortilla is made by hand, it is always better.

5. How many times have you had your heart broken? Wow, several. Very well (broken) once, because later you learn. But that one time, in little pieces, like those very thin glasses. It is a rich exercise to go for it, to dare, not to get into it with fear.

6. Did you learn something? That in relationships there is a wonderful and magical thing, that's when things happen it seems like it's a work of magic; but if you try, fight and hold on, the end is always catastrophic. I held on for a long time and paid the consequences.

7. What does your car smell like? It depensa hahahah. The week that my children are with me, to something called slime, which drives them crazy and it smells horrible, like detergent and glue. So, that's what it smells like every other week.

8. What defect would you remove yourself? Many, many. Especially in my work, I am very controlling, very apprehensive, I would like to know how to let go. But I have many other defects.

9. Favorite superhero: Deadpool

10. Which rules do your children always disobey? Errrhmm, not waking me up in the morning when I have to work at night.

11. Favorite swearing: I use almost all of them, hahahah, I don't have a preference. But the one I use the most would be… "pinche" (it's an adjective and it was translated as "damn" or "fucking"...).

12. Your worst habit: Smoking. It's something I want to quit soon, although I haven't dared to do it yet, and I eat a lot, I'm a glutton.

13. What are you epically bad at? Karaoke. I can't do it. It's not the singing thing, I even sang in a movie... it just gives me incredible stage fright. It is a matter of exposure, of vulnerability. Almost nothing makes me feel ashamed, but I can't sing karaoke even when I'm very drunk.

14. What question bothers you when they ask you? Whether I'm dating someone or not. Moreover because they are getting more and more clever in the way they ask. It seems like it has to do with something else and, suddenly, you say, oh, bastard! If I answer that I will tell if I have a girlfriend or not. I mean, it's not that serious either.

15. Your biggest fear: Not being able to be there accompanying my children in that process of understanding this place where they live and grow. To not being present. I didn't have that fear until they were born.

16. What do you wish for México? Empathy, peace and agreement among its citizens.

#diego luna #q&a #I translated this for the ones interested ♥

27 notes · View notes

almost-correct-quotes · 1 year

Text

guide to writing midwestern states, because more people should do that

small glossary to midwesternisms and slang under the cut

yeah + no:

"yeah, no" - no, of course not / i disagree with you / i hear what you're saying, but you're wrong

"no, yeah" - yeah, of course / i agree with you / i agree with you, and...

"yeah, no, yeah" - yeah, don't worry about it

"no, yeah, no" - no / no, don't worry about it

"yeah, no, for sure" - definitely

like, the most common midwesternisms

"dontcha know" - it means 'don't you know', but it can be used literally whenever expressing information

"you betcha" - i agree with you / you're welcome / you're right

"uff da / uff ta" - well, that's a lot

"ope" - something has occurred and i am surprised

"ope, sorry" - something has occurred and i am sorry (i go to school in the midwest and i hear this in the halls after two people bump into each other every day, i swear)

"midwestern nice"

the south isn't the only region known for hospitality

"c'mon, take home leftovers"

you're sad? i am making you food, you can't say no

midwestern states strike me as very affectionate for this reason

and, on the flipside, midwestern passive aggression

"well, at least you're pretty" - you are so dumb

"it's so cool that you'll just wear anything" - you dress terrible

"are you sure?" - that is not a good idea, but i don't want to be the one to tell you it

#wttt #wttt midwest #ben brainard #welcome to the table

109 notes · View notes

daintydongyoung · 10 months

Note

what bollywood songs do you think best describe your mutuals?

ohmygosh this ask is a bomb fr i really had to go through my playlist to find the one that suits them the best so here we go, i've added a bit of translations for some friends too 🩷 (i've added the songs below the descriptions for each)

@misschanadlerbong is certainly this i've been saying this for a long time now and idk how to explain this suits her vibe very perfectly and sonam kapoor in the movie again suits my hopeless romantic like yes

@everloving-avenue is the sweetest angel in existence and the words say "i don't know why but my heart knows i'll be alright as long as you are here, the one that makes me laugh even when im crying, it's you" i don't even need to say more ps. i associated this with mark before hence proving again mark and her are the same person, except for the fact that i love her more, sorry mark.

@nightfalls-teddy is this because the vibes match with her par excellent music taste and then the lyrics say "your friendship has me intoxicated like country vine, your sweet and sour talks get me high, this journey of life feels carefree, a friend knows about another friend" and no ash this isn't about you and haechan

@jaehunnyy is literally my precious baby and lyrics go like "my sweetheart how do i explain it to you how adorable i find you, the more im with you the more i wanna tell you" and she's perfectly a pretty woman both on the inside and outside, to me this songs suits her the best fr

@foziee is actually my jigar da tukda (piece of my heart) she's also the youngest moot i have and undoubtedly she's the cutest but at the same time she's a savage literally so chill and so fun but she's also has a soft caring spot and she's cuter than her golden retriever

@onyourhyuck is another beautiful beautiful friend and this song talks about "oh beautiful white dove, flap your wings and fly and reach the heights that no one has reached and keep on moving forward and forward without any fear" the meanings and ryhrms are perfect like herself it's aptly fitting her precious vibes

@partiallyderived is clearly my jaan i know she said she was dilliwali girlfriend before but again idk how to explain it's the very sassy and queen like energy she gives off it's all very very diva like and i know how badly she wishes the guy in the car was phanbin that's why this is her

@whereisahana is again such a queen i can't even explain and she's so chill and so relatable yet so smart and she excludes confidence through texts the first thing i thought of was this naturally

@its-me-satine is an angel undoubtedly and she has the sweetest heart and she feels like she walked out of a novel and this song literally has stand by me mixed with which again feels like her, it says "there's no other word like your name i've read a hundred books a hundred times" i can picture her doing the things she loves while this plays in the background

@maraudersbitchesassemble is this one totally like do you know about her and her many talents and the gorgeous gorgeous vibes she gives off i don't even need to say anything more she seems so artistic to me honestly

@asahix9 is this song and this app won't let me add more than 10 audios so here i am adding the link to the song and this song goes like "this life is in the arms of the sun, breaths are the sunrays and talks are sunshine" and it's honestly such a fun loving and cute song like herself it's about loving more and spreading more love around

🩷✨️

#anon #you guys are all such real queens ohmygosh i love each one of you so damn much i might cry ❤️

36 notes · View notes

jorrmungandr · 4 months

Text

(○｀ 3′○)

Uff-da fee-ta, I am exhausted.

Took a trip into Tacoma today to look at some apartments. I've been slowly winnowing down the places I'm interested in online, it's been tough, there are just so many available. And all pretty affordable, too.

Took the train in, that was fun. That'd be my new commute, streetcar to train, but I'd only do it like 2-3 times a week. I don't really need to be in the office as much as I am, I really only do it because it's so close so close that there's no reason not to.

First place I went was The Ruby, which is up in a quieter neighborhood right near a park, and a really nice grocery store. This is a brand new building, just opened last summer, and it's nice but a bit... small. Every place I looked at felt a bit claustrophobic. They're clearly trying to cram as many apartments in here as possible. But also it just feels kinda... shabby, somehow. Really nice views... from one side of the building, the other just looks over an alleyway (and the park).

The guy showing me around was nice, though. I dunno, it'd be the easiest choice. Very similar to where I am now, basically every floorplan is available, it'd be a painless process.

Went and got lunch at a place called the Art House Cafe, which is more of a sit-down-restaurant kind of cafe than the coffee shop I was hoping for. You just can't tell from google maps, sometimes. It was fine though, I got an eggnog latte and a tasty scramble.

Then I had some time to kill, and desperately needed to charge my phone. Went downtown, and found a little place to do so. There's like a weird open public common space in an old court building. A lot of Tacoma has this "preserved history" feel to it, honestly. I kinda like it.

Second place was The Astor, right in downtown Tacoma. Literally like across the street from a bunch of government offices. It's an old bank building, a skyscraper built in the '20s, just recently repurposed into apartments. They still have the vault in the basement, it's like a lounge now. Neat, but... a bit spooky.

The apartments were nice, but the one I was most interested in was taken literally hours earlier, someone else had a tour and applied on the spot that morning. I looked at another one-bedroom and a studio, which were nice but not the same.

The studio is probably what I'd go for... but it is a bit small, smaller than my current place. But I dunno, it would be nice and cozy, I could really fill the space.

I'm particularly tempted by this one because they're trying to fill it up, so they're doing a deal where you get two whole months of free rent if you move in in the next two weeks. My current lease isn't up until the end of February, but heck, I could just pay it and move, since I'd be living rent-free at the new place.

Went and got some of those Good Bagels at the Thriftway, then took the train back home. Much to think about. I'm definitely gonna sleep on it, at least. Maybe the floorplan I like would be available again in a couple months....

#pext toast #mundaneposting #apartment hunting #Tacoma

5 notes · View notes

poisonouswritings · 2 years

Note

Hello, this may be a specific one and i hope that's alright for you, i apologies if it's not; but can you write headcanons for the Main3 (Felix, Sage and Anisa) with an MC who is not a native english speaker but speaks it fluently please ?

So they have a rather heavy accent (something like a french accent) and sometimes it can be hard to understand them when they pronounce certain words or even insert words of their native language when they forget how to say it in english, so it goes something like:

"have you seen ze.. how to say ? ...Le tome magique ? You know, ze book i waz readeeng earliair ?"

(also like to insult anyone that annoys them in their mother tongue, so Rime or Escell the person don't understand them but know it's probably an insult or something lol)

Thank you !

Hehe funny props to you for that anon this is a really creative one. Good job.

GN!Reader, Colored Bullet Rule (Felix, Anisa, Sage), I'm learning German so I'm gonna use a German accent

I just think it's even funnier if Astraea does not have any accent similar so every single time you speak everyone around you is like 'what the actual fuck are you saying'

You come into the dining hall "I haf been practicingkt zis damn spell fur ze last two hours-" "MC are you doing an incantation right now?" "Vhat? No, uff kourse nicht-" "It doesn't sound like any spell I've ever heard." "Did I nicht chust say zat I'm nicht-" "Should we be ducking for cover or something?" "Fick dich (fuck you)"

German curse words!

Felix is micromanaging your spellcasting and you look back at him and go 'Erbsenzähler' (aka someone who obsesses over tiny details, literal translation is 'pea counter') (affectionate) and he's just like ??? Huh????

Anisa is being woefully dismissive of Orion's shady acts and trying to defend her and whatever and you're a little frustrated with her and you go 'Anisa, schlatz ('gem'), you must schtop beingkt a gehirnverweigerer ('brain denier') (affectionate) about zis' and y'know what? She is so distracted trying to figure out what word you just used that now you guys aren't even talking about Orion. You're talking about your language.

Okay chapter 1 where Sage is being a flirty idiot in the tower instead of being like 'no wonder you have that reputation' you just mutter 'lustmolch' (someone who is sex-crazed, literal translation is 'pleasure newt') (affectionate) and he just kinda rolls with it because I think he gets called foreign cuss words a lot when he flirts with people so. Par for the course.

You could also call Sage a Schluckspecht (someone who hits the bottle too often, literal translation is 'guzzling woodpecker') but platonic and he'd agree.

You and Felix are just hanging out and being cute and Escell kinda scoffs and you look over at him and snap 'Stinkstiefel' (grouchy person, aka a 'smelly boot') (derogatory) and he's not really sure how to respond. Felix doesn't know what it means either but he's been around you enough to know it's an insult so he snickers.

You burst into the study where everyone is hanging out 'Vhat iss ze vort for... um... zat ein zingkt mitt ze kolors? Der kuchen?' "Come again, dear?" 'It iss a dessert. A, a pastry I zink? It iss ze ein you always haf fur parties.' "A pastry for parties?" 'Da.' "Cookies?" "Do cookies count as a pastry?" "Well they're from the bakery." "Not everything out of the bakery is a pastry." "What? That's the point of a bakery what are you talking about?" "There's different things. Some bakeries sell sandwiches." "Felix why in the seven hells would we be talking about sandwiches-" "It's a common bakery item!" "No it fucking isn't!" 'It's nicht a sentwich, it's-' "No a cookie is a pastry." "What?" "A cookie is a pastry. Sage is correct. For once." "For o- fuck you!" '... None uff you are beingkt helpful.'

You were trying to find the word 'cake' because it's Stella's birthday and you want to make her a little salmon cake but ultimately you just give her some smooches while the Starsworn continue arguing about whether a sandwich should count as a pastry or not because hey it has bread.

#fictif last legacy #last legacy #felix iskandar escellun #felix escellun #fictif felix #last legacy felix #anisa anka #last legacy anisa #fictif anisa #sage lesath #fictif sage #last legacy sage #sage lesath x reader #anon asks #ozzy answers #ozzy daydreams

61 notes · View notes

taylersketches · 5 months

Note

TEEEEEEEEE! HAPPY 7TH ANNIVERSARY TO YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND! I'M SO HAPPY YOU TWO WERE ABLE TO CELEBRATE TOGETHER! 🫶💖

I'm so late but I am so happy to see you back! 🥰

This is another day again convincing you to get the Gojo cat because I feel like this breed will vibe with you! Hihi

And I totally agree! There is something with silver haired/blonde crazy men that no matter how questionable their morals were, you just can't help but fall for them. 🥵

I CAN'T WAIT TO READ YOUR NEW STORIES! AAAACCCCK YOUR GOJO, GETO AND ATSUMU WILL ALWAYS HAVE A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART! (Although my heart was basically filled with Nanami)

Also, what store? Your digital store??? 👀👀👀👀

Source for the pic: NO WORRIES THE LINK IS SAFE

Thank you, love 🥰 We had a lovely anniversary, even if tradition has changed slightly. We've had this tradition of having each anniversary in a new place, but we spent it where we live this year.

I actually looked at a Gojo cat today, and he was so CUTE!! He had the bluest eyes I've ever seen and was so fluffy. My husband also agrees that I vibed with this cat, but uff da, was he expensive!

I recently watched an anime where the main character had silver hair (Plunderer), but I'm surprised I stuck around for five episodes because it was so terrible. It reminded me why it took me years to get into anime 😅 Of course, I fell into the attractive MC with silver hair trap lol.

Now that I no longer force myself to write every week, I've kind of turned into more of a snail-writer, but I'm so excited about this Gojo fic I'm writing hehe 🙈 And SOBS, you're so sweet 😭😭 I'm so flattered that you like my writing! I've been going back and rereading my old stuff and finally started rewriting and finishing that Gojo fic 'Show Me.'

The stores are random local stores, but the next time I walk by it, I'll try to get the name for you because it's in Japanese and I unfortunately still fail in that department as an expat.

AND I follow this cosplayer on Instagram!! I sometimes use their stuff as a reference for little Gojo doodles I do in my spare time 😊

Anywho, I hope you're doing well, love, mwah

#💌: answered #lovelies: eydi

2 notes · View notes

cupzx · 9 months

Text

English is so boring because tbere is no way to say «uff da» in it

#norwegian for da win

4 notes · View notes

mikasimaginairyworld · 11 months

Text

The Umbrella Academy: Firecracker - Öga for Öga (17/30)

The Umbrella Academy Masterlist

warnings: blood, violence, torture, alcohol

word count: 3593

1982. Somewhere at an inn with ridiculously dressed people.

Nailah eyed the note the Handler had given her and Five. They entered the wildly overdecorated inn and Five decided to ask an employee for directions.

"Excuse me.", he said in an incredibly polite tone which let Nailah raise her eyebrows.

"Uff da! You snuck up on me there." the woman jumped up lightly. "If you're looking to the cookies we don't put them up until 3 o'clock."

"I can hardly wait.", Five commented still in his polite voice. "Do you happen to know where the Midwest Soybean Society is meeting?"

"Sure so. Muskellunge Banquet Room.", the woman directed them. Nailah thanked her and they took course towards the room.

"I didn't know you could be polite. Where is that going on a daily basis?", Nailah teased as Five motioned to a snack vending machine.

He just scoffed: "It's only to get people to help me."

"How come I help you then? You're not polite to me.", Nailah countered as Five let some coins fall into the machine.

Five chuckled: "Well, my little Firecracker, I only needed to give you some half-assed compliments and you were ready to help me."

The machine whirred but the nut fudge Five wanted didn't bulge. Five frantically began pushing buttons and shaking the machine. Snacks began falling down from the shelves and Five got even angrier. Nailah just stood there with her arms crossed and an amused expression. Finally Five punched the glass causing it to crack up forming a net over the snacks. He cursed colourfully.

"Sure. Some cheap complements are the reason I'm helping you. Definitely not because you'd be completely lost without me.", Nailah commented and gracefully kicked the glass down. She bend down, picket up a nut fudge and handed it to Five.

"Hurry up. The board of directors won't assassinate itself.", she said pulling out her staff from under her skirt.

Five smirked at her eagerness. Nailah walked backwards letting the staff swoosh into its actual length. She flicked it skilfully and threw Five a daring smile. He just scoffed, slowly walking towards her and ran his finger along the length of the huge cake on display. He licked off the frosting and Nailah just rolled her eyes playfully urging him to hurry up. Five spotted a fire axe and grabbed it standing next to Nailah in front of the door.

"Let's get to work, then.", he said and they walked inside the corridor with their weapons raised.

It didn't take them long to find the meeting. A pretty large group of people were sat around an oval table and at the end of it a humanoid with a fishtank as its head was leading the meeting.

"You!", the fishtank exclaimed as he saw Five. "Call security!"

A woman rolled back in her chair towards the phone but before she could reach it Nailah had cut off her arm with the sharp end of her staff. Five smiled at her wildly. He blitzed and in the next second two of the board members were lying on the ground with grotesque wounds on their bodies. Five just stood beside them and adjusted his tie.

Nailah chuckled: "So vain." Five made a gesture indicating it was her turn. Nailah returned the psychotic smile and gracefully began twisting with her staff. One by one the right side of the room was annihilated in the most elegant manner. Nailah cut, stabbed and punched with incredible precision and speed spraying blood all over her skirt, boots, blouse and face. Men and women were screaming for a short while then the life left their eyes. Five waited for a second before he blitzed around finishing off the left side of the room to admire Nailah.

Five blitzed around slashing his axe around in a not so elegant but equally effective way. Soon his own suit and face were also sprayed with blood. He inhaled deeply as he appeared on the table in front of the fishtank man.

"She sent you, didn't she?", the man gurgled.

"Does it really matter now?", he asked in an evil voice.

Five raised his axe but before he could let it fall down he heard Nailah laugh. Actually laugh. His jerked in her direction for a split second where he saw her bury her staff in a board member's chest while a manic giggle escaped her lips. He saw the deathly spark in her eyes as she transporter her power through the. staff and burned the member from the inside out. A satisfied smirk painted her lips as she quickly withdrew her weapon and skilfully flicked it.

Five realised he was suddenly only out of breath but before he could regain his breathing pace he got knocked down by the lady who had given them directions.

"You're gonna pay for that vending machine, mister!", she shrieked holding incredibly tight. Five struggled to breathe and get free until suddenly the woman stopped moving. Five looked up seeing Nailah covered in blood with her staff in the woman's chest. She was panting heavily and Five's breath hitched again.

"Come on. The fishman went that way.", she said pulling him up.

Five cursed and grabbed an old, flat bat and both he and Nailah ran back through the corridor. They spotted the fishman and Five smirked at Nailah blitzing in front of him.

The fishman stuttered and turned around. Nailah was standing behind him with her hands on fire and. a determined expression. She smiled a small, psychotic smile which was even more ominous in the fire light. Five inhaled deeply.

"It's me or him, buddy. Chose.", Nailah told the fishman crooking her head.

The fishman turned around again: "I'm sure we con come to some sort of agreement that benefits both parties. Quid pro quo?"

"Why not?", Five imitated Nailah's psychotic smile and began hitting the fishman. With each hit he accentuated: "Here's your quid. Here's your pro. Here's your quo."

With the last phrase he. knocked the fishtank off the fishman's body spraying water everywhere. Nailah elegantly formed a shield of fire keeping her from getting wet. She nonchalantly approached the small goldfish that had been residing in the fishtank.

"Hmm. So that's who you've been working for? A fish? Explains a lot.", she scoffed.

Five didn't answer just grabbed a bag and put the fish inside along with some water. Walking back to where they had hidden the suitcase Nailah felt Five glance in her direction a couple of times.

"What is it?", she asked scratching the blood off her fingernails.

"Blood looks good on you.", Five blurted out with a smile.

Nailah raised an eyebrow but chuckled: "I know, it's my favourite accessory." Five smiled at her amused and extended a hand for the to travel back. She took it and Five felt the warmth that was always accompanying her wrap around him like a comforting blanket.

Before the blue energy wave could consume them Nailah snickered: "Blood suits you too, Five."

Back in 1963 the Handler let Five and Nailah wait for her. Nailah was leaning against a building and playing with her staff. while Five was nervously biting his nails.

"Well?", the Handler asked as soon as she appeared. Five handed her the plastic bag with the fish inside.

"AJ!", she exclaimed. "You know, you're really staring to fill out this tight little suit of yours.", she said eying him hungrily.

Nailah made a disgusted face and shuddered.

"Why so quiet? I. thought you'd be buzzing after this mornings slaughter.", she asked.

Five didn't look at her: "All this killing... I'm done with it."

"What? Am I supposed to take that seriously?", the Handler smiled. and began wiping the blood off of Five's face.

"All I did today I did for my family. I did it to save the world.", Five assured with a determined look.

"Please. Spare your little assassin with the heart of gold, will ya?", the Handler booped Five's nose. "Here. As per. our agreement this will get you and your siblings back to 2019. You have 90 minutes."

"You said nothing about a time limit!", Nailah shouted after her angrily.

The Handler smiled: "Actually you have 89 minutes and 30 seconds. Better hurry."

"This is impossible, okay? Our siblings are scattered across the city.", Five tried to reason.

The Handler scoffed: "Nothing's impossible. You proved that this morning when you killed the board."

"We need more time.", Nailah demanded with fire in her eyes.

"Any more time and people will start asking questions. The sooner you get home and out of this time period the better off we'll all be, so ticktock, ticktock.", the Handler smiled and Nailah grunted in frustration.

At Elliott's house Diego and Luther found the poor host absolutely mutilated.

"Oga Foroga.", Diego read the inscription painted on the floor with Elliott's blood. "That a name?"

Luther and Diego found her in the phonebook under Olga Foroga. They immediately called her.

"Uh, hello? Olga? It's her she sounds old. Excuse me ma'am I was wondering if- My name? is uh Luther Hargreeves -", Luther was interrupted by Diego taking him the phone away.

"You killed. one of ours, Olga, now we're coming after you.", Diego threatened. "You will be dead by nightfall."

"Hey, it's Öga for Öga, idiots. Swedish for 'an eye for an eye'.", Five corrected appearing behind them and taking off his blood stained jacket. "It means the swedes killed Elliott."

"Wrong number. Have a lovely day.", Diego chipped into the phone and hung up.

"We would've gotten there.", Luther said hopefully.

"Eventually.", Diego added.

"You have some blood on you.", Luther commented seeing Five's bloodstained clothes.

"A lot of blood actually. Jesus, Five what happened?", Diego asked.

"Nothing anyone can prove.", Nailah answered walking into the kitchen with equally bloody clothes.

"Guys, what did you do?", Luther asked angrily as Nailah began changing as well.

Nailah smiled wickedly as she discarded her bloody blouse: "You wouldn't approve, Primo."

"We've found a way home.", Five said peeking out of the bathroom.

"Move.", Nailah pushed him away in her underwear and splashed cold water into her face, washing the blood away.

"What? How?", Luther asked.

Five's gaze lingered for a second on Nailah's bare back before he answered: "The details are irrelevant, but we made a deal to get back to our timeline."

"What about doomsday?", Diego asked handing Nailah a fresh shirt and skirt.

"Won't happen. Just like the apocalypse.", she answered.

"Okay, no more questions. We gotta go. We have to find the others. Luther, get Allison. Diego, Nailah: Klaus. I have a feeling we're gonna need both of you. I'll go get Vanya. Now, we meet back in the arrival alley in 77minutes. Here. I've synchronised these watches.", Five explained quickly.

"Whoa. Hold on. You just show up here, drenched in blood and expect us to just believe you when you say you have a way for us to go home? What about JFK?", Diego stopped Five.

"Diego, we have a chance to go home and make things right. We're taking it.", Five insisted.

"I've gotta say goodbye to Lila."

"You really don't, Diego. She doesn't give a shit about you. She never did. She's a member of the commission.", Nailah exclaimed angrily tying her boots.

"She was just using you to get to me. You're the Oswald of this story, my friend.", Five added and blitzed away.

Diego angry and frustrated left without waiting for Nailah. Before she could try to catch up to him Five appeared next. to her and grabbed her arm.

"Keep an eye on him, will ya? I've got a feeling he's gonna do something stupid.", he whispered.

Nailah jerked her head upwards, pretending to be offended: "Don't worry, Five. I've got this. I can handle him."

"Klaus, you're so filthy!", Klaus sighed as Nailah and Diego approached him. He had a pretty girl sitting on his lap.

"Yes, you are, daddy.", she chuckled and began kissing him.

"Hey, daddy.", Nailah shouted crossing her arms.

"You got a sec?", Diego asked.

"Diego! Nailah!", Klaus exclaimed and immediately followed them.

"You need to come with us. Five found a way home.", Nailah explained while Diego pulled Klaus with them.

"It's so great talking to you guys again.", Klaus lulled.

"Klaus, are you high?", Nailah asked looking at his sceptically.

"I'm not Klaus. I'm Ben.", he assured.

"Oh, you're high."

"No, ask me something only Ben would know.", Klaus or Ben insisted.

Diego sighed: "What did you reprogram Allison's teddybear to say?"

Klaus smiled: "Luther sniffs dad' underwear."

Nailah chuckled in disbelief and threw her arms around Ben in Klaus' body. Diego quickly joined.

"I don't get it, Klaus said. you didn't make it to Dallas.", Diego let go and Nailah wiped a tear from her cheek.

Ben chuckled and let his thumb caress Nailah's other cheek: "Well, Klaus says lots of things. But guess what. I can possess him now and it's freaking awesome."

"Okay, you can tell us everything back in 2019. But you stay in this body, okay? We need someone responsible behind the wheel. Oh and I need to do something first. Meet me at the alley in 30minutes alright? Don't be late.", Diego said and went off.

"Wha-?", Nailah groaned. "Can you get there alone? I promised Five I'd keep Diego from doing stupid stuff."

"Yes, of course. God, I missed you.", Ben smiled and planted a soft kiss on Nailah's head. Nailah smiled back and quickly followed Diego.

"Diego, what the hell are we doing?", Nailah jogged behind Diego nearly unable to keep up.

"We aren't doing anything. I am burying Elliott. He deserved better."

"Fine. But I'm helping."

Together they hauled Elliott's body to an abandoned place where Diego began digging. Nailah had gone looking for flowers and not soon after she was gone Diego sensed Lila's presence.

"Oh good. It's you and your stupid face.", he scoffed not even bothering to look back.

"Weird time to garden.", Lila commented. "Can we talk? The truth this time?"

Diego scoffed: "Oh I know the truth. You used me, Lila. You're a liar."

"Come on, what did I really lie about?"

"Who you are, who you work for, why you're here, what you want from us. That's all."

"Yeah, but the rest was true.", she insisted. "Everyone lies, Diego. And I was only lying to protect you. Mostly."

Diego stopped digging and looked at her. Covered in sweat and panting his gaze expressed nothing but pain and disappointment.

"Do you know how hard it is to trust people when your whole childhood was bullshit manipulation?", he asked. "Why would you do that to me?"

Lila couldn't answer the question. Instead she just looked at the body Diego was about to bury. She immediately recognised the green fingernails she had painted and as a way to honour Elliott she proposed a quick toast. Diego looked at her sceptically. Lila took a sip from her flask and handed it to Diego. He sighed but also took sip. Not soon after he felt incredibly dizzy and when he saw Lila spit out the contents she had kept in her mouth he immediately realised she had drugged him. Diego fell on the ground unconscious.

"Hey.", Luther came running towards Five at the alley. "Where is everyone?"

"You're the first.", Five smiled hopelessly.

Suddenly they saw Klaus stumbling and struggling with some invisible force approach them. before he reached them, however, he fell down twice and ran into the wall a couple of times.

"We're here!", he shouted shaking violently while t-posing aggressively.

"What do you mean, 'we'?", Five asked confused.

Klaus just groaned: "Get out!"

Then he vomited the contents from the last few days out and collapsed on the pavement panting heavily. Luther groaned in disgust as Five looked around frantically.

"I can't believe it. I mean you're here.", Luther shouted irritated and massaged his temples.

"We've got 8 minutes left.", Five announced.

"I've had the strangest dream.", Klaus groaned from the ground.

"Where are the others?", Five's voice was on edge.

"What's going on, guys? Are we going somewhere?", Klaus asked after a while of Five's nervous pacing.

"It was a simple task. A simple task!", Five shouted frustrated. "All we had to do was be here. Didn't have to fight a giant sea monster, no. An army of mutants? Nein. I can't believe this. It was handed to us on a silver platter."

"Can you just moan a little softer? My head is killing me.", Klaus whined sitting up.

"Listen to me, you useless puke bag, we just blew our chance to save the world!", Five screamed.

The suitcase sitting next to them gave a whirring sound indicating it was ready to transport them through time.

Five groaned: "God damn it." He grabbed the suitcase and threw it in the air. Blue energy whirred and the suitcase disappeared.

Five sighed: "We were that close."

Nailah ripped her eyes open. A muffled groan escaped her lips. She quickly realised she was gagged and in a small room. Luckily she wasn't blindfolded. Her head jerked around the room. There was pretty much nothing to see. She tried to move but her hands were tied behind her back. Nothing indicated at being watched but just out of habit Nailah decided to not use her powers until absolutely necessary.

Her head was pounding as faint memories returned. Walking around the abandoned place and picking flowers for Elliott. Someone sneaking up from behind and knocking her out.

A door opened and a tall man came inside wearing dark gloves.

"Nailah Hargreeves. Number Eight. Am I correct?", he asked in a smooth voice.

Nailah let out a muffled mumbled through her gag.

"Oh, yes, sorry. My mistake. Better?", the man removed the gag.

Nailah slid her tongue over her teeth and lips. She gave the man an amused smile: "Much."

"Perfect. Then we can begin. Your name is Nailah Hargreeves. Please confirm or deny."

Nailah chuckled: "Whoa there. Buy me dinner first, then we'll talk."

The man smiled at her in a condescending manner: "Miss, I don't think I've been clear. You will cooperate or you will suffer. It is entirely up to you."

Nailah laughed: "Is that a promise?"

"Suffering it is, then.", the man's eyes darkened dangerously.

Nailah crooked her head and smiled wickedly: "Bring it on."

Without warning the man punched her in the stomach, knocking the air out of her lungs. Nailah coughed violently and panted trying to regain her breath.

"Well. Let's continue, then."

"Did your mother love you?", Nailah asked out of breath.

"What?", the man looked at her confused.

"Well, it just seems that someone who tortures poor, innocent and totally defenseless girl has to have some issues. Your punching is absolutely trash by the way. So? Who was it? Mommy or daddy?", Nailah asked.

The man began stuttering still shocked and confused.

Nailah blew a strand of hair out of her face: "Mm, mm, mm, mommy?", she mocked. "That's what I thought. It won't be much of a consolation for you to know that she wouldn't be proud of you. Hell, she probably isn't. She's probably sitting somewhere at the beach surrounded by expensive gifts and cocktails just w waiting for all the admirers to take care of her. She's not even thinking about you."

Nailah smirked seeing the man getting more and more insecure. It had been a lucky guess about the mommy issues. but. she knew how to use any information she had to her advantage.

"I'll do you even one better. She's probably happy she left you. All alone. To do nothing but useless stuff. I mean what even is your job? Beating up girls? Does that pay? I can't imagine that it does. It seems that you're doing it to get back. at your mommy. But newsflash. She doesn't care. Juts like she didn't all those years ago when she left you. And yet here you are, still thinking about her while she has forgotten about you.", Nailah. continued.

With satisfaction she leaned back and watched the man escape the room. She heard him sob lightly before the door closed.

Not soon after that a new torturer came. This time a woman. Nailah smiled psychotically.

She crooked her head: "Now let's see what your issue is, shall we?"

The woman only punched her face letting Nailah taste blood. Nailah send her another smirk: "Try again. This time harder."

Diego opened his eyes and realised he was strapped to a chair with Lila next to him and a strange woman eyeing him suspiciously.

"Diego, meet my mother.", Lila said not looking at him. "Mother, this is Diego, my boyfriend."

-> The Umbrella Academy Masterlist

#tua netflix #tua #umbrella academy #the umbrella academy #luther hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #allison hargreeves #diego hargreeves #five hargreeves #nailah hargreeves #five x oc #oc #vanya hargreeves #victor hargreeves #series #netflix #fanfic

4 notes · View notes

seconds-not-decades · 2 years

Text

Step {Back} In Time

Pairing: Five Hargreeves x Fem! OC

Author's Note: Hello and welcome. This is my season two fic (and sequel to Time and Chase). I will be posting daily. *Please note that I am well aware that Elliot Page portrays Viktor, but due to season two being before his transition, that is why his character is still Vanya. I am not deadnaming him and I sincerely hope I don't come across as such. I will transition when I write season three.*

Warnings: Slightly long post, cursing, violence, lots of blood, and mention of death.

Previous | Next

Öga For Öga

~ * ~

On April the 1st, 2019, the Earth was destroyed in a cataclysmic event.

Billions of people were wiped out in a matter of minutes.

Ironically, the seven survivors of the apocalypse were the very family members who brought it on.

~ * ~

1982

Five and Karina made their way to the hotel, with Five reading the paper to make sure they were at the right place. More or less time period. The two slipped inside the hotel, surrounded by people dressed in some European folk attire.

"Excuse me," Five went over to a lady near the front desk.

"Uff da!" she shot up quickly. "You two snuck up on me there. If you're looking for the cookies, we don't put 'em out till 3:00."

"I can hardly wait," Five dryly returned.

"Uh, ma'am, do you happen to know where the Midwest Soybean Society is meeting?" Karina inquired sweetly.

The lady smiled at her fondly. "Sure do, honey bun. Muskellunge Banquet Room. You two looking for your mom? She in for the convention?"

"Hey, could I get some change?" Five noticed the vending machine in the hall behind her, holding out a few bills.

"Oh, sure, I'll just look in my purse," the lady took it as Karina gave him a sideways look. The lady exhaled softly when she pulled out some coins. "Only a nickel and a couple of dimes. Oh! You…are…in…luck, mister." She placed the coins in his hand and chuckled softly.

"You know, some say the best luck is to die at the right time," Five told her out of the blue.

The lady stared at him speechlessly before he meandered away to the vending machine.

"I…am so sorry. You'll have to excuse my boyfriend. He takes his poetry and literature very seriously," Karina lied to the poor woman before running off after Five.

Five was busily shaking the vending machine and yelling at it. "Stupid mother Fudge Nutter!" he slammed against it and cracked the glass. "Fuckin' Fudge Nutter!"

"How much damage are you going to inflict onto that poor vending machine?" Karina crossed her arms.

Five growled and stepped back to her side. "Why do I even bother with things anymore? Nothing ever goes according to plan."

"Mm, I think your marriage is holding up pretty well."

"It might be the only thing holding up compared to all the other shitstorms thrown at us."

"Let's just get this over, shall we?" Karina looked at him rather expectantly.

Five noticed she was shaking more than she would ever care to admit and he could sense her nerves clear across the room. He'd almost never seen her more afraid in his life. Nervous yes, uneasy, of course. But scared? She tried to hide her fear if anything else.

"Rina? What was the Handler talking about earlier?" he questioned, taking her firmly by the shoulders. "I need to know if you feel up to doing this."

Karina sighed. "It's a long story. I just never liked killing people. But, we need to get home and this is the only way to do it."

"Love-"

"We're wasting time, Five. I'm fine," she cut him off, but seeing the look on his face made her relent. "Okay, okay. She sent me out on a mission for something once, testing to see if I would make for a good field agent, because she thought about partnering us up. Well, it backfired, but I made it out and she decided against it in the end."

"Why was this never brought up to me? I could have helped you," Five was slightly upset now as they made their way to the meeting room.

"Because she didn't give me a choice and I didn't get the chance to tell you before she shoved me out of the nest," Karina heavily sighed, looking down whilst shaking her head. "And honestly, Five, after it happened, I didn't want to talk about it. I just wanted to forget it. Even the Handler didn't ever mention it after I got back."

"Did something happen to you?" he slowly looked at her.

Karina paused for a moment. "Yes," she quietly responded. "However, it's in the past and I'd love for it to stay there."

"I'm sorry. If you…ever want to talk about it again, just let me know," he took a breath.

She flashed him a ghost of a smile. The two continued walking to the meeting room, though Five eyed a large cake along the way and swiped his finger along the icing.

"That's sanitary of you," Karina scoffed as he licked the icing.

"Buttercream. Not bad," he spotted an axe hanging on the wall.

He grabbed the axe as Karina pulled out the dagger. The two stared at the doors and took a breath.

"Shall we make it rain?" Five glanced at Karina.

"Let's do it."

And with that, the two barged into the meeting room, weapons at the ready.

"Let's move on to article 17, please," AJ spoke as they entered. He gasped and shot up when he saw them. "You two!" he looked at Karina. "I thought you were only the Head of the briefcase division!"

"Decided to shake things up with a little help," Karina smirked.

"Call security!" AJ ordered as a woman hurried to the phone.

However, Five blinked over to her and cut her arm off as Karina threw her dagger, stabbing another. Gasps and screams erupted all around as the blood bath raged on. The two ruthlessly took out the Directors, stabbing and slicing their way through them without giving the members any last chance. One body was shoved through the ceiling and electricity crackled.

AJ shakily cowered down beneath the table as Five suddenly blinked onto the table with Karina. They were glaring down at him.

"She sent you two, didn't she?" AJ questioned.

"Does it really matter now?" Five scoffed.

"Whatever she offered you, I will double it, triple it!"

"We're not doing this for money," Karina stated as Five raised his axe.

The attendant from earlier came flying in, knocking both of them down as they crashed onto the ground.

"Get off me!" Five grunted, struggling to throw her off of him as Karina barely rolled out of the way.

"You're gonna pay for that vending machine, little mister!" she was fighting him.

"Yeah? I don't wanna hurt you, all right?"

"Hurt me? Oh, I ain't afraid of you, you little pus ball!"

Karina got to her feet and struck the woman in the back of her head with the handle of her dagger and knocked her unconscious. The lights were crackling above them as they looked around wildly to find that AJ escaped.

"Shit!" they both exclaimed, leaping to their feet.

They each grabbed a large paddle off the mantel before Five blinked them out. AJ was running down the hall when they reappeared in front of him and he gasped.

"Surely we can come to some form of agreement that benefits both parties!" he exclaimed. "Quid pro quo? What do you two say?"

Five scoffed. "Why not? Here's your quid-" he struck AJ in the side and he shrieked.

"Here's your pro!" Karina hit him in the knees and he groaned, collapsing to the floor.

Five lined up his paddle with the tank.

"No! No! Please don't!" AJ whimpered desperately.

"Here's your quo," Five finished.

"No…!" AJ wailed as Five's paddle smashed into the tank.

Water gushed out everywhere and the goldfish flailed onto the floor. His body fell down, thudding onto the ground.

Five and Karina let out a breath, covered in blood and hoping the price of their murder spree was worth paying.

~ * ~

The two were waiting impatiently in the alleyway. AJ was in a bag grasped by Five.

"Well?" the Handler appeared behind them. Five shoved his arm out and she gasped. "AJ!" she triumphantly cackled and cooed over the fish. She sighed, looking at Five. "You know, you're really starting to fill out those tight little shorts of yours." She glanced at Karina next. "And you are really starting to show off some serious potential in this field!" The Handler giggled as the couple glared at her. "Why so quiet? Thought you'd be buzzing after this morning's slaughter, especially since you did it together. Or is it like that one saying? Happy wife, happy life? Except…unhappy wife, unhappy life?" she chuckled at her own terrible joke.

"All this killing…I'm done with it," Five bit out. "And you have some nerve to send Rina out with me. More or less all those years ago, behind my back!"

The Handler was rather taken back by his outburst. "What? Am I supposed to take that seriously?" She whipped out a handkerchief and began dabbing away the blood on their faces.

"What we did today, we did for our family. We did it to save the world," he glared at her.

"Please. Spare me your little assassin with the heart of gold routine, will you?" the Handler remarked. "Here." She picked up the briefcase. "Per our agreement, this will get you, your wife, and your siblings back to 2019." She handed it to Karina. "You both have 90 minutes."

That caught their attention real quick as the Handler strolled off.

"You said nothing about a time limit!" Karina snapped.

"Actually, you have 89 minutes and 30 seconds, my lovely flower. Better hurry!"

"This is impossible, okay? My siblings are scattered across the city!" Five added desperately.

"Nothing's impossible. You two proved that this morning when you killed the board."

"We need more time!"

"Any more time, and people will start asking questions. The sooner you get home and out of this time period, the better off the three of us will be, so, ticktock, ticktock," the Handler softly said, almost menacingly.

Five looked like he was about to explode, but he shot her one last glare before blinking himself and Karina out. The two blinked inside the lobby of Elliot's place.

"Oh my God…" Karina pointed to the message written in blood on the floor.

"Shit," Five breathed out and the two quickly raced upstairs.

The two found a body with a cloth draped over it in a chair and he went over to investigate who it was. He drew down the cloth and the two hissed out in horror when they saw who it was.

"Elliot…" Karina drew out softly and sadly.

Five swallowed hard, staring down at him sorrowfully before wordlessly pulling the cloth back over him. The two began looking around for the rest of the family. Well, first they ducked down to properly and fully clean off the blood on their faces. They could hear Luther and Diego whispering.

"You will be dead by nightfall," Diego harshly threatened over the phone.

"Hey!" Five caught their attention. "It's Öga För Öga, idiots. Swedish for "an eye for an eye." It means the Swedes killed Elliott." He slid off his blazer as Karina took her jacket off.

"Wrong number. Have a lovely day," Diego said into the phone before slamming it onto the receiver.

Five sputtered some.

"We would've gotten there," Luther looked at Diego.

"Eventually."

"Yeah."

Five and Karina sighed, listening to the rather dumbfounded brothers.

Diego turned to them. "Uh, you two have some blood on you," Luther observed.

They slipped past them to the bathroom.

"A lot of blood, actually," Diego continued, watching them go.

"Five, Karina what did you do?" Luther was exasperated.

Karina shut the bathroom door on them and locked it.

"You guys better not plan on boning in there!" Diego loudly told them as the two brothers walked off.

That was not their plan at all. All they needed was to wash the blood out of their clothes so, they just opted to use the sink. Five let Karina go first, though she needed a shower more than anything so while she got a shower, he rinsed out the blood and dried her clothes as best as he could. The two switched positions once they were done. Once they were decent enough, Karina reopened the door.

"So we found a way home," Five announced as he redid his tie with Karina's help.

"What? How?" Luther questioned from outside the doorway.

"All the details are irrelevant, but…we made a deal to get back to our timeline," Karina responded, gently fixing Five's hair for a moment.

"What about doomsday?" Diego piped up.

"Won't happen," Five softly thanked Karina and plopped a kiss on her cheek.

"And the 2019 apocalypse?" Luther added.

"Everything will be back to normal. All right?" Karina assured them as the two left the bathroom.

"Now, no more questions. We gotta go," Five sighed. "We have to find the others, right?"

"Yeah," Luther replied.

"Luther, you get Allison."

"Okay."

"Diego, Klaus," Five pointed to him next. "We'll get Vanya."

"Now, we meet back in the arrival alley in 77 minutes," Karina continued as Five threw his blazer back on. "Here. I've synchronized these watches." She handed each of the boys a watch.

"Okay, let's do this," Luther was determined.

Diego however, was skeptical. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on! You two show up drenched in blood and expect us to believe everything's gonna go back to normal if we go home now?"

"Elliott just got killed because of us," Karina pointed out defensively.

"What about Dad? What about JFK?" Diego strode over to them coolly.

"Diego, we have a chance to go home and make things right. We are taking it," Five retorted, looking up at him in irritation.

"I have to say goodbye to Lila," he announced.

"Lila doesn't give a shit about you, Diego!" Five burst out in exasperation and Karina grabbed his shoulder, giving him a soft but warning look. "She never did. She's one of them," he continued a bit calmer.

"She's a member of the Commission," Karina looked at Diego sympathetically. She felt bad for him, truly.

He immediately shook his head. "No way. Not possible."

"She was just using you to get to us. You're the Oswald of this story, my friend. The goddamned patsy," Five turned and walked off.

"You don't know what you're talk-"

Five suddenly blinked in front of him, glaring up at him. "If you don't do this, I'll kill you myself. Got it?" he threatened him.

Diego coldly eyed him. Karina mouthed an apology to him before Five blinked them out.

~ * ~

Five and Karina were on their way to find his sister, when suddenly they ironically drove by her. Her and Five exchanged a stare and parked on the sides of the dirt road to converse.The three hurriedly got out and met in the middle.

"What are you two doing here?" Vanya asked.

"Looking for you. We're going back to 2019," Karina replied.

"What are you talking about?"

"Look, we don't really have time to explain right now, but we found a way home. All right?" Five broke in, glancing at his watch. "We have 30 minutes to leave."

"What about my friends? I can't just leave them here," Vanya was taken back, stopping the two before they got back in their car.

"Vanya, you don't have a choice in this, all right? Doomsday will happen if you don't come with us."

"Okay, then I'm bringing them with me," she remarked.

Karina gave her a sad look.

"They belong in this timeline," Five heaved a breath.

"Says who? You get to take Karina everywhere!" Vanya shouted, making him look at her in slight shock and Karina winced from that. "Sissy deserves a life where she doesn't have to pretend to be someone she's not. And Harlan? There's a name for what he has. We can get him the help he needs. If you can bring a plus one with you to every timeline, why can't I bring mine?"

"Because Rina is from our timeline. Not from any other. Ours. She doesn't belong here," Five explained coolly.

"Vanya-" Karina began.

"Look, a mom and her eight-year-old son are not gonna screw up the timeline, Five!" Vanya cut her off hotly. "They're insignificant."

"No one is insignificant," Five walked towards her. "We're sorry, all right? But we can't take that risk. They have to stay. Come on."

He and Karina started to make their way towards the car.

"Why do you get to decide?" Vanya shot in their wake. "You're the reason we're stuck here in the first place."

Five whipped around to face her again. "If I did nothing, we would all be dead right now, thanks to you!"

"Five…" Karina scolded him warningly.

"They're coming with me," Vanya was determined.

He scoffed dangerously, going back over to her. "Vanya, do not test me right now."

"That's funny. 'Cause I was just about to say the same thing," Vanya threatened.

She began to glow as Five conjured up his own power. Karina swallowed hard, about to intervene but they both powered down.

"Fine," Vanya relented grudgingly.

"'Fine,' what?" Five questioned.

"I'll be there, but I need to say goodbye first."

"Oh, Vanya, we don't have the time," Five told her almost sadly.

"Well, it's either that or I'm not coming."

"It's okay. Meet us in the alley. Just don't be late," Karina jumped in before Five could argue.

He sighed and muttered as the three split ways.

"Really? "It's okay"? You know we're on an insane time crunch here, Rina," Five remarked as Karina drove them off.

"Five, we're taking her from her friends. The least we can do is let her say goodbye. Besides, if the roles were reversed, I know you'd be wanting to say goodbye to me for the last time before you left," she pointed out.

He immediately went quiet from that.

She was right. Of course she was right.

"I know," he softly spoke after a few moments.

"I'm sorry this is stressing you out," Karina sympathetically told him. "But I know Vanya understands. She'll do her best to be here. As will the others."

"We'll see, darling," Five sighed.

~ * ~

The couple made it back to the alley and Five grabbed the suitcase he stashed in the dumpster. Five checked his watch as Luther came racing out.

"Hey," he greeted. "Where is everyone?"

Five grinned proudly. "You're the first."

"What?"

"Yeah."

Klaus came flailing into the alley, though in all reality it was Ben possessing his body.

"Hey! Hey! We made it!" he was chuckling and grunted when Klaus tried to take control.

Five, Karina, and Luther looked at him nervously.

"What do you mean, "we"?" Karina echoed confusedly.

There were distorted grunts coming from them as Klaus groaned and gurgled. The three watched him in growing concern.

"Get out! Out!" Klaus demanded. His body gurgled and soon he threw up, kicking Ben out in the process.

The three wrinkled their noses in disgust as Klaus continued groaning, collapsing onto the pavement.

"I can't believe it. I mean, you're here," Luther commented.

Five looked at his watch anxiously. "We've got eight minutes left."

"I just had the strangest dream," Klaus whimpered.

"Where are the others?" Five nearly yelled.

"We've got a minute left!" Luther slammed his fist onto the dumpster.

"What's going on, guys? Are we going somewhere?" Klaus hoarsely asked as Karina knelt beside him to check him.

"It was a simple task. It was a simple task!" Five ranted, pacing angrily. "All we had to do was be here. Didn't have to fight a giant sea monster, no. An army of mutants? Nein!"

"I can't believe this," Luther shook his head.

"It was handed to us on a silver platter!" Five continued.

"Could you just moan a little softer? My head is killing me," Klaus complained, sitting up with Karina's help.

"Listen to me, you useless puke bag, we just blew our chance to save the world!" Five yelled at him.

The briefcase suddenly came to life with a charging noise.

"God damn it," Five scoffed.

"Shit," Luther muttered.

Five grabbed the briefcase and shouted as he chucked it into the air. Karina ducked as the briefcase got sucked off.

"We were that close. That close," she sighed.

~ * ~

#the umbrella academy #five hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #allison hargreeves #ben hargreeves #diego hargreeves #luther hargreeves #tua #viktor hargreeves #aidan gallagher #tua season 2 #tua s2 #tua five #tua fanfic #tua fandom #number five #lila pitts

12 notes · View notes

pronker · 1 year

Text

Accents (G) Hogan's Heroes fic for Falling For Hogan's Heroes

Title: Accents Author: pronker Era: November 1944 Summary: Diva is as Diva does. Also, what if Manfredi and Johnson transferred to Stalag 17 from Stalag 13? A/N: Written for a theForceDAHTNET's challenge that matches tumblr's Fall For Hogan's Heroes 2022 Day 27 prompt: Lashing out/built up frustration, what are the odds? :)

"Uff da," moans Johnson.

“Non sei ancora pronto? Dai!“ growls Manfredi.

Rökk Marika is my name. The Germans say Marika Rökk. Ez nagyon állat. As long as I make UFA product to uplift the masses of the Third Reich and milk dear Herr Goebbels of tidbits of information, I take their deutschemarks as I dance to their tune. I have learned to accept much in ten years.

The dragon twitches its tail. Must I risk my manicure in this barbaric prison? There is no guard inside the Hall of Recreation per my demand, so I must.

"Stand still," I command. The two Americans inside the rubber dragon mumble something or other as I ascertain the site connection remains secure, tail to torso. "Do not squirm so. I shall tell you when to move." Ach, the bronze catch chips the Jungle Red paint on my left pinkie as I clinch it tighter. I play the diva as everyone expects.

"Tök rossz!" Manfredi and Johnson must hear me inside the dragon because I shout loud enough to awaken my baby; fortunately, Gaby remains at Hotel Hammelburg with Georg in our barely adequate family suite. He is so good with her. From habit, I trill my R's and rumble my umlauts to play up my Magyar accent. To listen to me would rouse the indigestion that plagues dear Georg at age sixty-two, yet I know Germans adore exotic touches as long as they are not too exotic.

A disturbance grows at the barred door while someone roasts the marshmallow-shaped guard. "Aw, come on, Schultz! We're all members of the Marika Rökk Fan Club. You've gotta let us in to get her autograph! Forget the rules for once!"

Mistrust gilds the gemütlich tones I've learned to recognize in two days' stay. "Colonel Hogan, please, it would mean my life!"

Skepticism silvers the other voice. "Your life, Schultz?"

"Well, maybe it would mean only my lunch, but that is still serious business."

A shrewd voice, its accent as familiar to me as the scent of paprika. "Schultzie, Schultzele, a petit four I made just this morning --- mmm, smell it --- oops the icing is still soft --- here, taste on my fingers --- "

"Das ist doch ja wunderbar and you saved this one just for me, only you would do this, how nice of you, cockroach --- "

Another voice, scratchy from cigarettes. "You love them so much, Schultzie, 'ere, take another."

"Very well, Colonel Hogan, twenty minutes, no more." I can hear lips smacking even through the door.

I have learned another thing in two days staging Ereleuva at Stalag 13: the door to the Hall of Recreation squeaks like an unrehearsed coloratura. After Schultz unbars the door to allow entry and then shuts it once more, a group of nationalities approaches.

Three Americans outnumber the rest, an intriguing Frenchman and an Englander, all in uniform except the Frenchman. I wonder why he is not.

Attitude leaks from the unquestioned leader, firm in voice, stride and manner. However, there lurks an artist's fire underneath. Dance? Music? Drama? "Madame Jacoby, our respects." There it is, step one of the code, which is the use of my formal name; it is common knowledge, yet an American could be excused for ignorance. I incline my head.

"You have the advantage of me," I purr as Manfredi and Johnson stir in their confining suit. Would they emerge to undo the latch as they greet their commander? They two may be taller than I am, but this is my rehearsal. I whip around to shrivel the one wearing the front part of the suit with a glare. Through the eye holes, I can see his gaze drop --- I am unsure if it is Manfredi or Johnson in the head of the suit --- and he retreats one step, bumping into the tail part of the suit to provoke a yowl from within.

The officer's decisive, unsmiling face relaxes into either a smirk or half-smile as he bows in the European fashion and indicates the rest of his group. "I'm Colonel Robert Hogan. I am senior officer of these men and head the Official Stalag 13 Rökk Marika Fan Club, where we eschew German customs regarding name order as much as we eschew saying Heil Hitler."

There it is, the second step of code recognition: the uncommon English word eschew, twice.

I am among friends.

IOIOIOIOIO

From ten feet away, the dragon stomps its clawed feet as it gurgles gibberish through the mesh-covered open mouth. In the weak light of the Hall of Recreation, its feldgrau scales tipped with gold paint lack our film crew's expert lighting to lend sparkling glamor and danger. As it stands, only the cerise spine crest head-to-tail brightens the rubber suit. Eh, Tail End straightens his spine to greet his comrades. I shall weep if the connection loosens again, but it does not.

"Cor, you two, wotta sight you are," chortles the Englander. The colonel focuses on me but the others surge to the dragon. The four men lean in closely to hear an account, I suppose, of what Manfredi and Johnson put up with helping me stage Ereleuva, a turgid, ambitious fifth entry to Wagner's Ring Cycle penned by Herr Goebbels himself.

Hogan allows one minute of reunion and then inclines his head wordlessly towards the door; the Englander and the American with springy hair drift to the entry after polite pleased to meet yous as they pass me. I note how they secure the area, one leaning casually against the door to block easy entry as the other engages him in conversation to provide covering background noise for Schultz's curious ear, if he thinks to eavesdrop. Obvious, is it not, that these soldiers team together as much as troupers in a successful, year long stage engagement?

The others clot around as I shoulder my way inside the tight group of the youngest appearing American, the Frenchman and the American colonel to play the sun while the three orbit me. Hmmm, the commander could be Mars, which would make the youngest a quicksilver Mercury and the Frenchman a languid Venus. I see now that the red sweater sports a discreet rank or unit patch on the shoulder, so French good taste triumphs over Kantian ideals of a uniform. I approve. Idle notions like these make my Georg consult my opinion about our films together. I wonder how the day proceeds with small Gaby and her loving pappa.

"Let us push on, because I must return to my husband at the hotel in two and a half hours. I must feed my seven month-old Kleine. She will be hungry."

"Can't your husband feed her? I mean, come on, it's not that hard." The youngest's face shows honest puzzlement.

This is too outrageous a comment to let pass. I put on the face I used in Woman of My Dreams, a triumph at the Axis powers' box office just this summer. Georg calls it my sly Marlene Dietrich face. "I can tell you from experience, that doesn't always work."

"Carter!" explodes Hogan. I feel certain this one does not blush often, yet now his ears burn a becoming shade of crimson. "Think about it."

Carter does. "Oh."

"We won't keep you long." The man becomes all business, so I must, as well.

I fish the slip of paper from the top of my stocking, just under the garter. "Here. I overheard this place name and the word 'soon' at a cast wrap party. The atmosphere at the smörgåsbord dripped with triumph between Goebbels and the others in line; I do not know more. You westerners have the information, and in two weeks our crew travels to Czech Revar to pass this name to the Russian contact. She intimates to me she has used you before."

Hogan's ears burn the uppermost hue of Hungary's tricolor once more and is that disgust or acceptance on the handsome face? "If it's who I think it is, used is the word, all right."

"I see," I say. He thinks, remembers, and then continues.

"How is Goebbels these days, gnädige Frau?"

I shrug. If time permits, I can banish his execrable German accent. "He promotes my work, but he is hard to like therefore I do not like him. I am an actress so I pretend to like him and this" --- I flourish the slip of paper before stuffing it into the colonel's grasp --- "rewards me and now you."

He secures the paper into his cap swiftly before his eyes widen as if my words register at last to spark protective instincts. "Don't take your baby to Czech Revar!" he bursts out. "I hear terrible things go on there --- "

"It is no Széchenyi Spa, true. Have you seen Czech Revar?"

"Well, no --- "

"I have and it is as pleasant a land as I have visited. Our crew goes to shoot backgrounds of the mountains for Ereleuva."

He pushes. "Aren't there enough mountains in Germany? Do you have to travel so far?" I recognize the signs of one well used to control. We do not have time for this.

"Kamerad, colonel, I give up. Ask Georg because he is my director in all things and the father of my child. He would not risk us."

"You are more trusting than the law allows," mutters Hogan before changing the subject. He removes his cap to peer at the name on the paper. "Losheim." His intense concentration and crinkled brow prods my memory of the cast party I viewed through a mist of schnapps.

"I, I think that Herr Goebbels said that a, a bold push comes through the Losheim gap."

IOIOIOIO

I sense there is little this colonel does not know despite his imprisonment, but Losheim puzzles him as much as it does me. He beckons to his second --- I think it is his second by the chevrons but I, too, am unsure in this moment and do not wish to show it --- and the second moves across to us while the Englander stays his solo post guarding the door. "Losheim Gap ring any bells, Kinch?"

The reply arrives quickly with becoming modesty. "Not really. London is worried about the Siegfried Line, though. A gap sounds dangerous to them and to us. Three hundred ninety miles of protection for the Krauts."

The dragon shifts uncomfortably and I spare the two men. "Sit, sit. Take the load off, as you say."

"Tanks," comes through the mesh loud enough for us to hear as the two crumple onto the floor, then roll onto their sides awkwardly to spare the suit.

"Tanks," repeats Hogan. "Artillery and tanks could pierce a gap from either side. This name needs to reach London pronto, Kinch."

I contribute what I can. "Westwall is what we --- I mean the Germans --- call the Siegfried Line. Have you seen the Westwall?"

"No, we flew over it. Have you seen it?"

"Not in person. It is said to be impenetrable."

"That's what we said about the Maginot Line," says the Frenchman softly. There is in his face embarrassment for his country, and grief for her, and resolve to do better; I feel the same precise way about my Hungary and the disgraceful Horthy who deserves whatever the Nazis charge him with.

Hogan appears not to notice my sympathy with the Frenchman. "We're stuck in Hürtgen Forest, a real quagmire," he grumps, hugging himself tighter. "If only Field Marshal Model hadn't jumped into bed with Adolf --- "

"Really?"

"Figure of speech, Carter."

"Oh."

Hogan seems at ease with speculating in front of me. "Since Normandy, the Krauts are on the run but they'll turn like anyone would if pushed against a wall. They'll fight like demons."

"They are demons," I say. "I have seen things that you have not, dear colonel." Ach, the dear just slipped out.

"Timepoint ten minutes in from twenty." This from Carter; I sense the man operates on science and mathematics or perhaps on another plane of existence from the rest of us mortals. It endears him to me.

I take command. "Our time is nearly up. I would like to speak with the one wearing the red sweater."

"Me? Nobody ever wants to talk to me!"

Hogan gestures permission absently, drawing aside to confer with his second about Losheim while Carter tags along. The five each display a thread of artistic talent to my professional eye, and I wish to ask an opinion as we two seek a corner. "What is your name?"

"Louis LeBeau, at your service." He is so courtly! I feel he was born that way.

"I am a dancer and a singer and der Führer wishes Georg to direct me in a heavy going drama about Ereleuva, of all people."

"Who?"

I ramble a bit, a fault of mine when I am passionate. "Der Führer approved Herr Goebbels' tiresome story of Ereleuva, the mother of Theodoric the Great of the Ostrogoths, who lives on in legend as Dietrich von Bern. She is a mother though perhaps not a wife, she is true to her faith and she will fight a dragon in the story to protect her country, can you believe it?" I want to pace, but I calm myself deliberately. "Why not pick her daughter, Amalafrida, who led a revolt, or the daughter of Amalafrida, Amalaberga, who also attempted a coup? Why not Ingund or Aregund, sisters who practiced polygamy with King Chlothar, whom you may know as King Clotaire?"

He shakes his head as his eyes begin to cross. "I only sing and dance a little in revues. European history, pah." I laugh.

"Herr Goebbels told Georg to 'make her the typical, strong Teutonic queen, brave in battle, efficient in family matters and of course beautiful.'" I shrug. "Herr Goebbels realizes Der Führer adores Germanic history and likely will censor whatever he disapproves of, so Georg and I must toe the line in this film. Ereleuva will uplift the masses."

"Is that what you want to do?"

I meet his gaze firmly. "I must, even if Wagner pirouettes in his grave. I will dance, sing and primp in another film, if there is one." This next is difficult to say, though I feel his mind is open, at least. "Do you think I can play a queen?"

"Indubitably, madame." He again lifts my hand for a kiss.

"So, we owe you one. What can we do to help you?" Hogan approaches more quietly than I would think. Louis and I both jump a little.

This question is easy to answer. "Pretend to attack me. Critique the movements of the dragon." I wink at them all. "Play with me to make the scene less serious, less, less … um … "

"Less Boche." Louis blocks the action. "Everyone, get up on the stage. Stage left, Manfredi and Johnson, middle shall be Madame, and you four stage right. Vite, vite! Carter, the time?"

"Huh? Oh, right, five minutes, tops."

"Then, I think, mmmm, Madame in profile with an imaginary sword, and you four show your backs to the audience. You will support Madame."

They complain as all soldiers do. "Not me best side, mate." "Can the dragon breathe real fire to burn us?" "LeBeau, don't let directing go to your head."

This will be the most fun I've yet had in Stalag 13. I seize a ping pong paddle before mounting the stage. "I have an idea to blend capoeira with the usual boring swordplay! Let me show you."

"Very well, use it, whatever capoeira is." Louis speaks loudly to be heard through the rubber suit. "Manfredi and Johnson, on your toes, menace Madame. Everyone else, go with the flow." He vents to his comrades. "Move, shift your weight, don't just stand there! Pretend you have swords!"

Manfredi and Johnson roar, claw the air --- well, Manfredi does because I believe now the head end to be him --- while Johnson sweeps the tail end. As the dragon draws near, I swirl the paddle over my head to catch the attention of the beast before rocking back and forth on my feet. The dragon halts in surprise as I stand on my hands before launching a backwards somersault flowing into a muted kick at the dragon's teeth. I misjudge the distance a mere trifle as the kick lands on Manfredi's throat. He staggers sideways, pulling Johnson with him until they sway like two pendulums. The joint between tail and torso gives way and I groan, "Tűnj az utamból!"

I roll forward like a bocce ball towards the dragon to control the damage to the expensive suit, but the acting bug seems to have bitten the three Americans and the Englander. There, I'm between Manfredi and Johnson now, who regard the suit sadly as they sit splayed upon the wooden floor. "You had to do it, Manfredi, just had to ruin the dragon, and after all the time we spent in it."

Manfredi appears unable to speak and waves his hands instead. Johnson looks to take offense at the gestures after he removes the dragon's head from Manfredi. "You can't call me that and get away with it."

Louis shouts, "In character, in character! Keep it moving, only a minute or two before Schultz --- "

Hogan, Carter and the Englander drop the act as my support warriors while helping me to my feet, as if I need any help. Manfredi massages his throat, I start to apologize and then Johnson takes a swing at Manfredi. Is Johnson a Berserker?

"Hold it, hold it!" reprimands Hogan as he attempts to make peace. The Englander clutches Johnson's arms from behind, I admonish, "Hagyd abba!" and Louis joins us on stage. Perhaps Johnson is a Viking Berserker because he kicks at Manfredi, who dodges backwards to stumble into Hogan, who sways into Carter, who bumps Kinch who staggers into me and we all go down in a heap while a dark object sails past me down onto the floor.

Louis crosses his arms and shakes his head as he peers down at us. "Incroyable." This must not happen when film is in the camera. It is good to get this contretemps out of the way early. In our daze, none of us react to a squeak and then bang! of a door slamming against its jamb as another person enters the Hall of Recreation.

"Himmel," breathes Schultz. "Himmel." He stoops to retrieve Hogan's cap. "Here, Colonel Hogan, oh too bad, it is crushed. I straighten it for you."

Louis is best suited for what must happen. He makes a startling jeté off the stage to the floor and snatches the cap. "Schultz, merci."

The Englander finds his voice even though sprawled out. "A bit o' blockin', Schultzie, and good as new, I say."

Kinch gains his feet to lift Hogan and me to ours. I should like to know these men better, but now it is time to gather up props and script, bow in gratitude to them all, and change into street clothes from jaunty mid-thigh skirt and stretchy pullover. "Please call my car, Sergeant, while I make ready to leave. This scene needs a rewrite."

Schultz clicks his heels and departs.

IOIOIOIOIO

The End.

IOIOIOIOIO

#falling for hogan's heroes #hogan's heroes #day twenty seven prompt #lashing out/built up frustration

3 notes · View notes