#bites lmfao

[fairygothmotherisgay]

DC Social Media AU Part 7

I'm back

#tim drake #conner kent #kon el #bart allen #kon el kent #damian wayne #duke thomas #jerry the turkey #bites lmfao #thaddeus thawne #thad and bart the twins #cassie sandsmark #bartkon #konbart #for real this time #wally west #jason todd #birdflash #bat family #batfam #all bros gotta do is go to the family dinnners #bruce wayne #stephanie brown #ive missed her #cassandra cain #cass cain #dick grayson #yj98 #young justice 1998 #dc social media au

[bluebells-and-dragonflies]

Imagine Astarion with ears so sensitive that he's never willingly allowed anyone to touch them except for you. Imagine laying next to him in your bed, facing him, lifting your hand up slowly for that first touch. His eyes on yours, the rapidity of the breath he doesn't need to take, but still does reflexively. Seeing that he's nervous, but that he's trusting you, feeling his shaking hand come to rest on your waist. The audible sound he makes- half a moan, half a gasp- when you finally brush your thumb over the soft skin at the tip of his ear.

You trace the long shell of his ear and watch his pretty eyes, deep red like velvet in the moonlight, flutter shut. He says your name softly, as close as you've ever heard him to prayer. You pinch his earlobe gently, and his hips roll forward involuntarily, the jut of his hipbone pressing against your thigh as he makes himself still. Heat flares low in your belly, but you tamp it down as quickly as possible- likewise, Astarion makes himself still against you. This isn't sex and won't become sex, you'd promised each other (though that's not to say that you won't explore this thoroughly during one of your hours-long lovemaking sessions. He is all about experimentation these days, after all).

You lay there, touching him in his most vulnerable place, with reverence and grace and occasionally disbelief that you could be here at all with this beautiful, horrible, ridiculous and wonderful man, that you could be trusted so completely. You take in his every shuddering breath, the flexing of his fingers in your shirt, the softness of his mouth when he presses his lips to yours and tells you he loves you. If you have your way, if he has his, if somehow your utterly insane lives hold together for a year or a decade or ten, it will always be like this.

#astarion x reader #astarion x you #bg3 x reader #astarion x gn reader #astarion x tav #astarion x gn!tav #.astarion #check me never knowing how to coherently end a thought ever in my life #i AM one of those people that advocates for astarion staying snarky and awful even after everything LMFAO #it's just that now he only acts like that with people he thinks deserve it. or when it's funny #that said: with you? snarky and biting sometimes #yes. but also #sometimes #so soft it makes you want to squeeze him to death or something #also...reminder that i take requests...if u like...

[my-little-girlboss]

Oh, so when Dungeon Meshi writes about cannibalism between socially ostracized neurodivergent siblings who only ever had each other, it's sweet and emotionally poignant.

But when I, the Coffin of Andy and Leyley-

#the main differences are #that falin is chill and kind while ashley is the human equivalent of deadly neurotoxin #and that laois is sad puppy that will bite when he has too #but andy is sad puppy that'll your throat out at the slightest justification #also the whole sibcest thing but whatever lmfao #tcoaal #the coffin of andy and leyley #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #the one thing that is kinda funny #is that both laios and ashley have internalized that they're monsters for being different #ha ha the pain is eternal actually

[crybaby-bkg]

you know how basketball players do those little conferences where they sit in front of a mic and let reporters/journalists ask them questions???? that but with pro hero Bakugou and his barely one year old baby. he walked in with his full hero gear, save for his gauntlets bc it’s hard to hold baby with them on, and he doesn’t want her to mess with it!!

and when he sits, he holds her up against his chest, her little chubby arms grabbing at the hair on his nape and tugging on his bottom lip bc she finds it so funny. he just lets her, answers the questions like there isn’t a baby trying to dig up his nose and gnaw on his cheek, leaving a trail of spittle in its wake.

she babbles on and on, her eyes lighting up in surprise when she turns to the mic and hears herself. Bakugou can’t help but laugh though, leans down to nibble on her fat little cheeks, forgets to compose himself when everyone starts snapping pictures. a reporter steps up and asks her, “Baby Dynamight, who’s the best ranking hero of this year?” and she answers, babbling a little, turning and looking at Bakugou with a gummy grin and two little teeth sprouting at the bottom as she giggles a, dada daaaa dadada!

also the baby of the group that everyone passes around. Bakugou hates giving her up to anybody, but she will twist her little body around until he damn near drops her whenever she sees Uncle Kiri sitting beside them. she stands on his thighs and tugs at his hair, then goes to Uncle Denki where she slaps at his cheeks bc he makes funny noises and faces whenever she does. Uncle Sero is next, where he bounces her on his knee before Aunt Mina swoops in to give her some nice girl gossip. Uncle Deku is always last, only because everyone knows baby will be out like a light whenever she’s in his arms and cuddled up against his chest. Bakugou is furious every time, but also a little grateful that the shitnerd was able to put his little gremlin to sleep with his boring ass face.

#I pictured him just playfully gnawing on a little chubby baby cheek earlier and almost passed away #I love chunky babies and biting them especially when they’re ticklish!!!! #I need him to give me a baby NOW!!!!!! #also hc that baby always goes to sleep whenever she’s with Izuku Hitoshi and shouto #they’re all just so calm and that relaxes her so much #maybe not Izuku in the beginning lmfao he’d be so jittery before he realizes that everything’s okay #okay bye my head hurts BUT I WONT THIS SO BAD #—new treat in the streets! 🍫 #bakugou treats! 🍬 #dad bkg

[cringefail-clown]

i love the new emergent genre of turnabout ships that's just targeting june with an orbital laser. dave's got a crush on your nanna, his bro is flirting with your dad, can't have SHIT in paradox space

shes NOT having a good time

#homestuck #june egbert #turnabout au #homestuck turnabout #ask #robro and her dad. dave and her teen nanna #on top of that the teen version of daves robro pulled her teen ecto grandpa #SOMEHOW its always those damn striders LMFAO #can we talk about dirk too tho #his clone snached his crush #and the teen version of his bro got HIS BEST FRIEND #he and june are gonna start biting people #or start up a support group lmfao

[hey-hermy]

do u guys like my new glasses

#these are two different pairs and Yes i only have the one pose #fuckin bite me lmfao #me to myself: yes i want to take nice pictures but i Also want to make sure my plants are in the background ok #rip old pinned u will be missed #me #cute #personal #🤷‍♀️

[dagwmeno]

Doodleys pt.2!!!!! I love drawing silly skeletons at school

#bittensketches #utmv #art #horror sans #nightmare sans #nightmare my fem queen with da dress 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 #killer sans #I drew killer and horror biting the book in religion class lmfao #can you tell im very ecstatic about religion/sar

[harrows-bones]

the discourse around campal is so funny to me because this series has cannibalism and fucked up relationship dynamics all over the place and the thing people get hung up on is that they’re second cousins

#campal #the locked tomb #camilla x palamedes #camilla hect #palamedes sextus #i love cam and pal in any interpretation of their relationship but like #it is literally in the books that the basically the whole sixth house is related in some way #ianthe was taking bites out of babs regularly and this is the thing that y’all are hung up on??? couldn’t be me sndhshhdksn #i for one am more icked out by god fucking two of his saints but y’all do you i guess lmfao

[chrycorner]

This is SO late, just SO LATE, but uh here we are a couple power-outages later - HAPPY HOLIDAYS @grimmrabbits I was your secret santa this year for @fmasecretsanta and let me apologize again for this being so atrociously late :,,,) I really hope you like our angry nugget boy. You wanted to see some FMAB/2003 Edward and it got me thinking that Ed is kind of like a pokemon. He starts the same in both versions and then evolves into slightly different end results haha. Anyways, since we all know they start pretty similar and grumpy, I thought it would be cute to see Ed's adult results side-by-side.

Both slightly more mature, slightly calmed down, 2003 still a stupid ambitious creature and also probs a bit shorter oops, FMAB pretty satisfied with life overall, thinking dad thoughts, both alchemy-less, but both having REAL ARMS!? I think they'd be bros over all they've accomplished and the emotional growth they've achieved by this point in their lives. (And also for their shared brotherly love of Al, mama Trisha, and complicated daddy problems lol)

#ed's saying “Bite Me” in the first one btw #His younger self shall be preserved forever #love the angry nugget man lmfao hes so pleb #secretsanta #fmasecretsanta2022 #fma #gift #art #fanart #fma fanart #fmab #edward elric #fma edward

[celestie0]

Cockwarming satoru under Meath the towel and begging him to fuck you already answered kissing his jaw n asking “please toru” I need him so bad 😭😭😭 also gojo would probably get jealous of all the guys staring at you on the beach when you’re tanning 😭😭☠️ would probably try to cover you up with his jacket 😭😭

LMAO babes i told u not to read the tags 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 (im going insane)

omg you’re so right he’s so the type of bf to want that sight for himself ✋🏼😭 this is sosososo old school shojo anime trope but i imagine reader wore pretty modest swimwear/clothing the first few times they went on beach dates together like those cover-up slips over bikinis n so he expected her to show up in something similar to like the bonfire social that his frat was hosting but she shows up in something really revealing n he’s like

😧😧😧 holy mother of FUCK

but he gets pissed tf off when other dudes are staring at her too n he’s holding her to himself n turning her away from them so they cant see n he wraps a towel over her n she’s like?? why r u trying to cover me up i thought u would like seeing me in this 🥺💔 n that lowkey breaks his heart n he shows you later that night just how much he likes seeing you in it 💀🦋✨

#i cant help myself w these headcanons im sorry ✋🏼😭 #trying to bite my tongue but i cant LMFAO #heheheh #kickoff #asks

[cringefailvox]

I read a fanfic where they called Velvette a Chihuahua and now I can't unsee it. Help.

HELP NOW I CAN'T UNSEE IT

#LMFAO??? #that's kinda real tho.... tbh #bark is bigger than her bite fr #velvette #hazbin hotel

[maledistributionsystem]

Look at you, under me. My knees on either side of your waist, leaning over you while I keep my hands firm on your shoulders. Your eyes is real big like a little deer, haha, you know I can feel your heartbeat right?

You look so goddamn handsome right now. Moonlight on golden brown skin, the slight shine along the gradient of your lips, the way your eyes are pulling me in; somehow darker than the already dark room. You look in the mirror lately? Your jawline is changing, it's squaring itself out. Your shoulders lookin different too. You're like a flower or some shit, blossoming into a man at my hands.

Tell me, You wanna get hurt?

Nah—Hey!—Dont you try that shit again or I'll pin you forreal. Lay there and relax. I aint goin nowhere and neither are you. yet.

Think about it. You, me, shorts, MMA gloves, gym mats. You've noticed by now, yeah? You're a little stronger than you were before I started workin' on you. I wanna test it, I wanna beat the hell out of you, and you can do the same to me. I want to hurt you. You should see how much more a man can take than the imposter who was in your place before. I wanna see that realization in your eyes when you realize how much easier it is to hit me just a little harder. I wanna see how much sweatier you can get now. I wanna hear all them new noises you can make in your new voice. Don't you wanna see it too? the evidence of your actualization? You look all calmed down, I'll ask you again;

You wanna get hurt, little man?

#force masc #forced masculinization #autoandrophilia #autoandrophile #black ftm #black masculinity #ftm nsft #mlm ftm #MDS Originals #I love sparring so fucking much it was my favorite part of taekwondo #when i can afford it i wanna take BJJ and MMA classes #also lmfao when i typed relax i just kept thinkin of that one video thats like this dude with his cat and hes like #'mothafucka relax. Relaax. OUUUUUUUUUUU' #its so fuckign funny #he makes that noise cause his cat bites the shit outta him its so fucking good

[lizbertmegafig]

playing more yokai watch 3... i'm playing as Nate and went to go wash my hands in the sink and a yokai jumped out, told me i didnt wash my hands good enough, and then proceeded to beat my ass in a fight. so now im going to make a post about him

this yokai is called Washogun! he is obsessed with cleanliness! if you don't thoroughly wash your hands after using the bathroom, he will manifest in your room and beat the absolute fuck out of you! his favorite food is: sweets! he can usually be found in: your fucking bathroom!

#im not mad. why would you think im mad #cross-posting from cohost lmfao #bix bites #yokai watch #yokai watch 3

[pinkhibiscustea]

a plethora of sketches

♡

#ace attorney #phoenix wright #ace attorney fanart #naruhodou ryuuichi #maya fey #apollo justice #franziska von karma #klavier gavin #trucy wright #yes theyre vampires in thr first 3 #idk what prompted me to draw them as vampires but hey #also may or may not be developing a trucy aa au?? teehee??? #idk how to write LMFAO #biting off way more than i can chew

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

okay but the realization that Howdy is actually a little bit of a scoundrel? a scammer even?? was like the BEST part of the update for me!!! his got a bit of spice to him i like that!

idk if it’s just me but it feels like it’s very important that Eddie was the only have like a extra audio thing on his character sheet in the neighborhood besides Wally and the You page?? like that feels significant somehow right??

i just really loved both Howdy and Eddie in these updates they were so great

GOD i know i know he's got some Kick to him! he's got Flavor! i love how he turned the common perception of his character on its side - everyone expected him to be wholesome and helpful and sweet, and then the update came in with the fuckin steel chair-

hmmmm i can see both sides of the beetle on Eddie's bio - the significance, and the possibility of it just being There because most pages had 1-2 bugs, and the audio was about Eddie. but ALSO its so so likely that is Was significant! i honestly thought so as well!

i mean, the beetle is very uhhh, Valentine looking? the prevalent heart shapes, the soft pink-yellow-white coloring, plus its an audio centered on Eddie and Frank. we already know FranklyDear is going to be an established Couple - so i'd agree that the significant is There! and if we lived in an alternate world where we didn't know about FranklyDear, we'd all be losing our collective shit over this and theorizing the hell outta it

#SORRY I DID NOT SEE THIS ASK!!! #im going back through to see what i can answer that Doesnt have a scribble idea attached/prompted #i remember making a sort of delighted Suprised Pikachu Face listening to howdy's audios for the first time #bc like wow! yeah! hes a bit of a menace! #how did we not see it coming... hes a Salesman... of course hes Like That lmfao #of course hes gonna scam them! everything is already technically free and its not like theres any other way to get their goods! #he might as well have fun with it! thrifty bitch (affectionate)! #rambles from the bog #and how eddie is a totaly sweetheart and so helpful and a complete pushover- #ok not a Complete pushover #but its obvious he has an extremely hard time saying no and feels obligated to do whatever is asked of him #i hope this bites everyone in the ass. i hope the neighbors stretch him so thin he snaps <3 #i want to see/hear eddie go the fuck off on someone <3 #i love it when sweet doormat characters Lose It <3

[ofshivelight]

i'm so deep into my jewish studies that even my dream self is keeping kosher now

#LMFAO #i had a dream that i took a bite of something and realized there was salami in it #and immediately spat it back out and said SORRY! to thin air (god) #jumblr #jewblr