#boss makes 100$ i make a dime kind of thing

[chai-sweets]

A bunch of little Kierans I scribbled while at work

#I have SO MANY work doodles #I’m basically a pro at wasting time on the clock in my stupid office job #the key is get everything done really fast and perfectly and then you have half the day to kill #but do it strategic enough so nobody knows you’re ducking around #boss makes 100$ i make a dime kind of thing #pokemon #pokemon sv #trainer kieran #the indigo disk #pokemon scarvio #my art tag #work doodle series

[joshslater]

Five Step Program

Similar stories and bonus material on my Patreon.

I stared at the contents of the envelope, a blue jockstrap, and a folded piece of paper. I hadn’t put much hope into this “miracle solution” to becoming a jock without any of the work. Of course there was a catch. “First 20 customers get their first shipment free of charge” was enough for me to fill out the form with my information. It wasn’t anything too revealing. Name, address, height, weight, age. A box where you could write what you hoped to achieve with this revolutionary five step program. That’s what they really were after, I guessed. Having people enter their dreams so that they can tailor their next scam better. I was even surprised I got anything in the mail at all, and now having opened it, it made even more sense.

I could see how sending a jockstrap to someone perhaps fulfills some legal requirement that the recipient could now look like a jock. It could be a way to avoid getting a federal fraud charge. But I hadn’t spent a dime on this, so it didn’t make any sense. The jockstrap looked like any other jockstrap, I guessed. I’d never owned one, nor worn one. The pouch was dark blue and made with two layers of some synthetic mesh material. The big waistband was light blue with the letters JOCK repeated in dark blue around it. There was a faint smell of synthetic material and detergent. I did a mental sigh and opened the folded letter.

Congratulation on becoming one of our first customers on the revolutionizing five step Jock Express program. As a thank you for signing up, this first part is totally free of charge. Should you wish to continue the program, as we are confident you will after having successfully completed the first session, simply use the URL at the bottom of this page to enter your credit card information and we’ll send you the next item as soon as the payment is confirmed. I’m happy to inform you that we can offer a reduced price for the entire program, should you chose to start it within five days. The price is only $100 for the next installment, and progressively higher as you advance in the program. There is no commitment to purchase so you can stop the program at any point. We’re confident you will want to complete all the five steps in the Jock Express program.

Fuck that! What morons sign up to this kind of shit?

Instructions: The Jock Express is the easiest and most user friendly fitness program ever developed. Simply drink a lot of water, put on the items included in each program step, as you normally would, and go to sleep.

I was even more confused. Why would that sway anyone to put out $100 for at best another piece of gym clothing? I put it all in my in-tray on my desk and let it slip from my mind. I had dinner, watched TV, answered some late emails and the usual Tuesday stuff. By bedtime I walked past my home office and had the sudden recollection that I had something waiting in the in-tray. Then I remembered what it was, and almost reluctantly decided to go ahead with wearing the damn thing. I was still convinced it was a scam, but was immensely curious to exactly how it would work. If nothing else I would get to feel what wearing a jockstrap feels like. I drank a glass of water, put on the jockstrap, and went to bed. The jockstrap was as comfortable as anything and I quickly went to sleep.

Apparently I slept through the first alarm, and jolted awake on hearing the more incessant buzz from the phone. I jumped out of bed and it wasn’t until halfway to the bathroom I realized I was naked. I wouldn’t say massive, as in cartoonish in any way, but my dick and balls were noticeably bigger than before. It took a few seconds for my still startled brain to put the pieces together. The jockstrap had disappeared and somehow affected the body. It hadn’t replaced any body parts, I could still recognize my dick, but it was for sure altered. Suddenly $100 felt like way too little money. I didn’t even put any pants on as I typed in the URL from the letter. Jock Express step #2  for $100 and express delivery for another $25. Annoyingly no option to order all four remaining steps as a package. I just wanted to have them all in my house as soon as possible.

By the time I had entered all my details, checked all the boxes, and clicked the final webshop button I was rocking a massive hard-on. The biggest one in my life so far, by far. I didn’t care right then if I would come late or call in sick, I just knew that I had to take my pre-cum leaking enhancement for a test drive, and slowly started to move my hand up and down the shaft. It felt better than ever, and lasted longer than I have ever before. I’m not really sure how long, because I zoned out a bit while wanking, and then exploded with an epic load of cum. I managed to tilt the chair back and catch it all on my body, but then I felt really spent and dozed off, only to be brought back with a text message from my boss. Sick day it is, I decided.

A more apt description would be a lewd day. I just cycled between laptop porn, wanking and showers, and combinations thereof. I loved the difference it made when wearing underwear. Even when flaccid you could tell here was action waiting, not just only wearing underwear, but while wearing jeans too. I took photos so I had progress photos to compare with.

The next day was a strange one. I worked all day in the glow of someone with confidence, as if somehow I had done some achievement. I kind of surprised myself with how much of a difference it made when dealing with the pileup of emails from yesterday. Big dick energy. I could make decisions so much faster than I was used to. I don’t know if I really had more confidence, or just didn’t care as much. I was for sure giddy with anticipation of what was yet to come by overnight delivery. I forced myself to stay until official end of office hours and then bolted and drove straight home.

Thank God there was a DHL box in my mailbox, or I don’t know what I would have done. I opened it on my way in, and it’s contents were similar to the first one. A folded letter and some folded cloth. Without opening the letter I unfolded the cloth, which turned out to be a plain, sleeveless, white cotton T-shirt. Had there been someone to high five, I would have done so. I’m not fat, but there is a bit of flabbiness I would love to get rid of, so I couldn’t wait for this part. I felt anticipation in my stomach and something else in my pants. I hadn’t had a wank since this morning.

Evening couldn’t come soon enough. The letter said basically the same as the last one. A new URL for the $400 Jock Express #3, which I immediately ordered, again with overnight shipping. Not really sure what to kill time with, I figured a jock would watch sport, so I just randomly put some football on. I hadn’t really paid any attention to sports before, so I wasn’t sure about who was who, what the series looked like, or really what happened on the field besides the obvious. I ended up masturbating to the football, which in my opinion made it better. By 9:30 I decided to drink a few glasses of water, strip, put on the sleeveless T-shirt, and go to bed. I tossed and turned in anticipation for quite a while. The T-shirt had a very loose fit, and the big holes for the arms made it even more mobile, though it was anchored by the crew neck. Finally at some point I managed to fall asleep.

I woke up before the alarm. It was dark enough that I knew I hadn’t slept through them all. Instead of getting up or turning on the light, I just slowly moved my hand to my chest under the sheet. My chest was about the same size, but felt firmer, I imagined. But more importantly I was naked and the shirt was gone. I moved my hand down and couldn’t contain my joy when I started to feel the faint square of abs. I jumped out of bed and ran into the bathroom to have a look in the mirror. The effect was better than I thought from just touch. My torso not only looked fit as a model, with abs and V and all, but younger and with better skin. Perhaps an illusion, but it almost looked like my dick was bigger as well.

Having woken up early, after a wank and a shower, I was one of the first in at the office and quickly got ahead on my tasks for the day. I still had the anticipation I felt yesterday, but today it was more like I knew what to expect. It wasn’t just a one-off or a fluke, this was legit and it was happening. As I started early I decided to flex out early and rush back home. I spent the drive home fantasizing about different types of clothing. I was kind of wishing for those sleeves they use in basket, to amp up my arms, but there might be some scientific reason why they changed the body parts in a specific order. Who was I kidding? This wasn’t science. This was magic.

I ripped open the familiar package as soon as I was inside the front door. This time it was white under armour legging of some sort, ending just below the knees. I was considering strip down fully naked and put on the leggings right then and there, and wear them until it was time to go to bed, but decided against it. Even though the descriptions were vague and didn’t really say you couldn’t do that, I didn’t want to risk fucking up the process. Instead I found some underwear in the same color as the jockstrap and took a pair of scissors to an old white T-shirt to make it look like the one I put on yesterday. Then I put on those, and nothing but, and sat myself in front of the TV, determined to actually try to follow the game this time, whichever game I happened to see.

It might be I imagined it, perhaps because I’ve never really seen myself in a sleeveless T-shirt before, but it looked to me like my arms were a bit more defined than yesterday. I realized that I had just assumed only the parts under the clothes are affected, but that’s just something I made up. It could be that it just primarily acts under the clothes, or perhaps it was just a coincidence and the clothes really could change anything. In the end I let it go. It didn’t matter, I couldn’t prove it either way, and I couldn’t watch a game, have deep thoughts and masturbate all at the same time anyway. I was so into it I almost forgot to order the next package. A steep $1000 for whatever the next item was, but so far it was fucking worth it.

I really liked how I looked in the 3/4 leggings or whatever the fuck they are called. Just imagining how much better I would look the morning after made me go to bed with a big boner, despite being thoroughly wanked. I tried to calm myself by thinking of the last game I watched, and not give Jock Express a thought, and it kind of worked. I know I fell asleep pretty quickly and dreamt of football until the alarm woke me up.

“Fuck yeah!” was the first I could think when I saw myself. The thighs were about as large as before, but the line going down them made it obvious they were muscles and not jiggle matter. It even felt different just standing. I’m almost positive my dick had grown even more. Who the hell wouldn’t dish out $400 or whatever for this shit?

While the day started great it quickly became frustrating with all the corporate bullshit. I knew how to do my job. There were just so many fucking rules in the way of doing it in the best way. Perhaps the anticipation of the second to last package made me be in a bad mood. Whatever. I bolted as soon as I could, cranked up the volume in the car, trying to not think of anything until I got home. I almost punched something when I opened the mailbox and didn’t find an envelope. Instead it was just a note about DHL attempted to deliver while I wasn’t home. I could either call them to deliver tomorrow or drive to a pickup point. Like fuck I would wait another full fucking day.

I was furious when I got back into the car, blasting music as loud as I could, but I quickly calmed down. Perhaps this was a good thing? It might be a box with shoulder pads from football or hockey or lacrosse or whatever the fuck else looks hot. You know what else is hot? Michael at the DHL pickup point. I mean, I’m not homo or anything, I’m just saying he was a good looking dude.

The packet he gave me was a bit disappointing though. No way it could contain anything as large as shoulder pads. I didn’t want to fuck with my mojo, so I kept the same routine as before and didn’t open it until back home. Fucking cleats and socks. Another fucking leg day. And they smelled bad too, like distilled vinegar or some shit. As I entered the URL from the letter on my phone I got two more shocks. The price of the last package was ten thousand fucking dollars! And even worse, the delivery wouldn’t arrive until Monday. Two fucking days away. “This is bullshit” I shouted at nobody and threw the empty cardboard box into the wall to no damage to either.

I was still furious and went straight to the fridge, pulled out a cold can of beer, opened it, and downed half of it. It felt better, but I was still upset on the world in general. I looked at the phone screen again. $10k is a fuckton of money. There wasn’t a rush to buy it right now either, if they didn’t do overnight delivery during weekends. I emptied the can and crushed it against the countertop. It hurt my hand, which just added to my anger for being such a weakling. I pulled the rest of the six-pack out of the fridge and threw it in the living room couch on my way to the bedroom. I needed to get out of these stuffy office clothes and cool down with a cold one, or four.

I ripped off the tie and started to unbutton the shirt on my way into the bedroom, and once there opened the door to my wardrobe. I felt like a girl, not knowing what to wear. I hated everything my eyes fell on, and I hated feeling like that. I bunched the shirt into a ball and threw it into a corner, together with the tie. I climbed out of the pants as quickly as I could and threw them there as well. Then I stopped myself.

Everything I saw I really liked, I realized. The pecs, the abs, the thighs, and the generous bulge in the boxer briefs.I yanked off my socks and more deliberately lowered my boxers to let the dick and balls loose. I knew what I wanted from this junk selection of clothes, and opened a drawer with my athletic clothes and pulled out a pair of grey sweatpants. It was Friday and my dick and balls deserved some freedom, I thought, as I put on the sweats without any underwear. I picked up the sleeveless T-shirt from the floor by the bed and put that on as well. I felt so much better. A few beers, whatever game was on, and some more wanking, and perhaps this could turn into a good evening after all.

After two more beers, cum stains on sweatpants, T-shirt and the couch, and fuck knows how many games I zapped through I couldn’t wait any longer. Whatever bullshit the cleats and sock did, the sooner it was over with, the sooner I could move on with the final package. $10k was still a lot, but if I sold all shares I could buy it, keeping both house and car.

The socks went almost up to the knees, but weren’t any real soccer socks or anything like that. The looked more like something someone might have to the gym, or something a skater would wear. Skater was perhaps right, because they smelled like that vinegary acidic smell of really sweaty skater shoes. The socks were white with a wide black band around it near the top, and were a bit off-white on contact surfaces around the foot, as if they had been used in black shoes by someone. As if I would fucking care. I pulled up both legs of the sweats over the knees and put on both socks, pulling them as high as possible. The cleats were black and a bit banged up, but fit perfectly on my feet. I didn’t even remember having given out my shoe size. I was unsure how tight to tie them, so I went with comfortable without being loose.

It felt weird walking with them, like the shoes were pushing your forward. Not at all like my much flatter leather shoes. Somehow my test walking ended up by the fridge, so I grabbed another six-pack and returned to the couch for some more ESPN or whatever.

I had no idea what sport it was on the screen, but glancing out the window I could see that it wasn’t evening anymore. I must have fallen asleep, I realized, but I felt way better than I ought to, given the pile of crushed beer cans around me. I walked to the toilet to have a piss, and it wasn’t until I lowered the front of my sweatpants to grab my morning semi-stiff snake I realized I was barefoot. I was pissing for probably a good minute, aiming down with one hand. Holy fuck so much I’ve kept in while sleeping. I was pretty sure I had cleats and socks on when I fell asleep. I did a few bounces on the balls of the feet. It felt fucking great, and shook loose the last drops of piss from my dick. I dropped it back into the sweatpants, and broke into a smile from how fucking huge of a tent it made, despite being just a semi. I did a few more jumps, looking at how the flagpole in my front swung up and down. I really didn’t deserve to feel this great after yesterday, but I’d fucking take it. I felt so full of energy I felt I could do anything. I wanted to run just to see how it would feel.

I dashed into my bedroom and emptied the rest of the athletic clothes drawer on the floor. Some T-shirts, a pair of basket shorts, white socks and wiped down indoor and outdoor shoes. All of it was underwhelming, outright disappointing. And why the fuck did I keep the shoes here and not by the door? I grabbed the outdoor shoes and without bothering with socks started to mash my foot into it. It was clearly at least one size too small, perhaps several. Who the fucks know how shoe sizes work. I threw both shoes into the wall above my pile of office clothes. Fucking hell. Why do all days start out great and then go downhill so fast, I wondered.

I grabbed a pair of flip flops, the car keys, and pulled the credit card out of the wallet and walked out to the car. The car stereo startled me when I turned the ignition key, as it blared out some hip hop at max volume. I reached to turn it down, but changed my mind. It felt like my mood, as I was driving to my closest mall almost below speed limit. There wasn’t much traffic out anyway on a Saturday morning. As I turned into the almost empty parking lot in front of the mall I realized the fucking God damn shit mall would open for another 40-something fucking minutes. I wished I could turn up the music louder.

As I looked down on the cum stains on my shirt and tenting sweats I decided why the fuck not, and started to beat off in sync with the music.

40-something fucking minutes later I entered the sporting goods store in the mall. Johnson’s or Dick’s or Willy’s or whatever, I don’t care. I picked up some proper compression clothes, like the leggings I had earlier with a matching top. I got myself some outdoor Nike’s, a few proper tanks, some jocks, boxer shorts and socks, new flip flops, and a snapback cap. On the way to the cashier I decided to pick up a wooden baseball bat and a regulation size football as well. Back in the car I ripped off all the stickers and shit and put on something I could run in. The sneakers, jockstrap and shorts, a tank top, and the snapback. I left the car and just ran.

It was a revelation. The first time I tasted ice cream or coca cola, or the first time I discovered I could do something else with my dick besides peeing and hitting it too hard. I felt like a good damn terminator. Like as long as I kept the pace below sprinting I could run for hours. Trickles of sweat running down my face, my arms, my back, wetting the fabric of my clothes where it could, cooling the skin with the breeze my motion generated where it couldn’t. I have no fucking idea how long I actually run. When I finally ended up back in the car I was steaming and real fucking hungry.

I felt like a shower was in order, but I was too hungry to do that first. I went by Five Guys and had a bacon cheeseburger with fries and a peanut butter milkshake. As I started eating I realized I wasn’t anywhere near tired. It was probably enough running for today, but I wanted to do more. Halfway through the meal I decided I would visit the gym we had a company membership at. I had only been there a few times since the introduction walkthrough. I wasn’t even sure I had the card in my wallet anymore, or if it was in the bowl of stuff in the kitchen.

I made a quick stop at home, unloaded my car, found the card, and set off to the Pacific Wellness Center. The dude in the lobby had a pissy attitude and asked me if I was wearing indoor shoes. I asked him what they looked like, and he let me in. Such a shame, because he was kind of good looking.

Inside the gym the results were mixed. Squats, lunges, planking, and abductor machine all went excellent. It was fun, even. But everything involving arms went miserably. I could only lift a pathetic load, and after a few reps I would be tired. I even embarrassed myself in front of two massive gym buddies. One of them had amazing arms. You could see how strong they were even when he wasn’t lifting, but fuck me what beautiful ‘ceps when loaded. And tanned too. It was lucky I had the jockstrap on, because that body was smoking hot.

I could only stand a few more failures after that and then sped back home, still with hip hop at max, in a mix of emotions. I got naked on the way to the bathroom, and there I spent perhaps an hour in the shower, getting the grime and sweat off me, and wanking twice, thinking of the arms of the hot dude. As I dried myself on a towel I knew I had to buy the last package. Ten fucking thousand fucking dollars. I had to use the laptop to access my bank, and once I had put in the sell order for my stock portfolio I saw the pornhub tabs I hadn’t looked at since Wednesday.

The big-busted bimbos I had wanked my way through the Wednesday suddenly didn’t seem as interesting. I clicked around a bit until I found a muscle stud fucking a Latino girl. How quickly the taste can change, but except for pathetic arms, I’m was now the muscle stud. I quickly entered the URL from the Jock Express #4 box and ordered the last package. The delivery date was still Monday, so come Tuesday the muscle stud would be me. Only one fucking week.

Since I was out of beer I threw on my old shorts and a T-shirt, and had a walk to my nearest convenience store and bought one six-pack for each hand. I was feeling a bit stiff from the training, but it was much better than it ought to be.

As I opened the door back at home the warm smell of gym clothes, sweat, and feet hit me. I did the responsible thing and threw everything in the washing machine, opened a beer, and started to watch whatever was on.

Sunday was just a boring-ass filler day. I woke up at a decent time, had a long run. I passed through the park, but didn’t engage with any of the groups playing football or beach volley there. I could wait two more days to get my arms sorted. I did some cleaning up and domestic shit back home. Then I went to the gym again, but this time I pretended it was leg day, so I didn’t have to embarrass myself. After dinner I had an evening jog as well, and only had a few beers before bedtime.

Same thing on Monday. Woke up pretty early and went for a long run. When I was almost back home I got a text message from my boss, saying we needed to talk about my performance over the last few days. My answer “Suck my balls” probably summed up the conversation much better than any in-person meeting. I found that the best way to find porn with muscle studs in them was to search in the gay section. Just because you like to watch big arms and strong backs doesn’t make you homo. I jacked off to the videos until it was time to eat lunch. By 2 pm I was climbing on the fucking walls in anticipation, and every minute felt like too long. Perhaps it wouldn’t arrive today at all? I heard the mailman at 2:18 and rushed out wearing only shorts and snapback.

The mailbox was stuffed full with a big, soft envelope. I tore it open on my way back inside, kicked the door shut, and emptied the contents on my kitchen table. A big black something fell out, as well as something small that rattled across the table. Ignoring the letters, as usual, I unfolded the cloth. It was a big, black hoodie in sweatshirt material, with the print “STRONG” on the front. Finally arms! I picked up the small plastic box that almost fell off the table and opened it. It contained some sort of advanced mouthguard mad in blue, white, and transparent plastic of different hardness and flex. The kind that football players use.

Not knowing what to do next, I went to the gym and spent a few hours just randomly doing low weight, high rep stuff. I was trying to catch a glimpse of everyone else who worked out to see what their arms and legs looked like. Once I felt it was too obvious I wasn’t doing anything serious I drove home, but instead of going inside I started to walk and walked for hours just looking. It felt good just to be in motion. I didn’t return back until the sun started to set, and it was almost fully dark when I walked through the door.

I decided to just go ahead with the last piece of transformation. I stepped out of my sneakers and pulled off my damp socks. It didn’t smell of strawberries. I pulled off the T-shirt and stepped out of the basket shorts, but kept the compression shorts on. I grabbed the hoodie from the table and put it over my head. Perhaps it was me, but it smelled of musky sweat inside while I put it on. I poured myself a big glass of water and downed it.

I walked with the small plastic box to the bathroom and had a look in the mirror. I didn’t really look that different. The big hoodie hid my newly athletic front. The legs and feet looked strong, but who ever notices that? My big bulge in the compression pants was however a change from the past week that couldn’t easily be hidden. I opened the box and put the mouthguard into my mouth. It fit snugly and didn’t change my appearance much either. Not knowing what to do with the hoodie I put it up over my head and pulled it tighter with the drawstrings so all but my face was gone. Then I turned off all the lights and went to bed.

It was still dark when I woke up. Instantly I knew it had worked, because I couldn’t feel the mouthguard in my mouth, though it felt different. As if the ghost of the mouthguard was still there, prying my mouth open. I felt some sort of pressure on my head, as if I was wearing a hat or a beanie or something. I was about to feel my head when I realized moving my arm felt different. Not wanting to fuck around any longer I went straight to the bathroom again to have a look in the mirror. I stared at my reflection with open mouth. The difference was breathtaking.

First of all I wasn’t wearing any top, so my abs and pecs were on full display, but they were also bigger than before. Everything was bigger. My shoulders were much bigger, my entire upper body looked wider than before, and everything about the arms were huge. My face was still my face, but there were lots of small changes. “Fucking dope” I said with a much deeper voice than what I had before. I smiled a smirk and flexed the arms in different poses. I couldn't wait to show up at the gym doing an arm day. I just needed to have another shower. My dick needed service, and I felt sluggish, as if I hadn't really wakened up yet.

[cactusjerk]

Story time about the worst job of my life. Was working in the foreclosure branch of the German health insurance company (three letters), all the while being completely poor and battling a life threatening illness. It was around the time I often couldn't even afford heating and I will never forget how the people were treated there.

Met some very nice and kind people, but the whole environment was a breeding ground for psychological harassment and abuse.My boss was giving me shit every chance he got. It was the personal type of abuse that leads to other coworkers starting to hate you too, and in the end I had like two coworkers in my room treating me like shit because they felt like it's expected of them. While this was taking place, the company was pushing ads about how active they are with their anti-mobbing measures. Absolutely ridiculous joke that added insult to injury.

I think that was the point I didn't give a fuck anymore. I was hired for foreclosure stuff, but they ended asking everyone to push their garbage dental plants to people who called in. These plans were only paying in very specific circumstances, so I didn't think they were providing good value. In all my time I was there I didn't sell one of them. Not saying it was intentional; I was just not good at lying to people and I'm proud of it. After many years I am probably still the person who sold the fewest dental plans ever. Lol.

Then they were butthurt because I wasn't willing to participate in some kind of company marathon. You had to travel to some backwoods town, all on your time and dime, and I was barely making enough money to pay for my 100 Euro train ticket to work and back. Also, I was unsporty spice and would've probably dropped dead after one kilometer so so I told them to talk to the hand. Needless to say they didn't like it one bit.

Then the overtime work. Was hired for a specific amount of hours, but they actually expected you to do lots and lots of overtime after what was already a full time job. That was one of the things I really couldn't believe because it's basically a way to undermine the contracts they signed you with. Got reprimanded repeatedly because I wasn't doing enough overtime. They said "you know, it's not legally expected, but it's expected and you'll regret not doing it".

Saturday work. Same there. I wasn't hired for Saturday work, but they expected you to come in nonetheless. I needed that Saturday to recover because I was a total mess and normally slept like 5 hours a night, so I told them fuck that.

When all this took place I was mentally dead. Depressed, overworked and I was walking around like a zombie. Was working with really poor and desperate customers and it often broke my heart because I could relate all too well. In the one or two years I was there we had been on lockdown twice because someone tried to kill us, and my boss ended up with a stalker that lasted for years.

To get there I had to drive an hour or take the 4 or 5 am train in the morning and it was full of people that were already drinking. I don't drink, but around this time I could sympathize with the people trying to numb themselves down before work. I could understand and if I would've stayed I would probably drink too.

Well yeah, left out the dirtiest bits, but you get the idea. This job was the reason I decided to jump face forward into the Cactus business and it was the best decision of my life. Wrote two books, started a YouTube channel that's developing greatly and am a world class Cactus breeder. This job also lead to me meeting my beautiful wife, so looking back it was all worth it. 😊✌

#health #healthcare #health insurance #krankenversicherung #toxic #work

[uta-h3m-vcd-tbw]

Who Am I?

I have attempted to dialogue the events in my life at least 100 times beforehand but probably more but could never bring myself to be completely honest.  Call this a personal inventory if you will.  I consider myself a better writer than most however when it comes to writing about myself my brain goes blank.  I know what I want to say, it’s just how do you go about telling anyone....”I am a Heroin addict.”  

I have read a couple books about other addicts & have watched countless documentaries, movies, & shows about addiction.  Always paying close attention to how the writer unfolds his/her story trying to translate it to my own with little success.  I eventually came to the conclusion that so much has happened in the two decades of drug use that there is no way fathomable to include everything...at least not in your standard literary fashion.  

A few days ago I stumbled across a new series on Netflix about a girl that liked to blog on Tumblr & suddenly I felt I may have an outlet to format this timeline of events.  Make no mistake about this...everything I write from this moment on is 100% true whether you choose to believe it or not.  Hell looking back....I don’t believe it sometimes & constantly find myself asking God why am I still here & why have so many perished before/besides me?  What makes me so special?

Most stories I read/watch about addiction are pretty generic.  It typically starts with someone who was injured & prescribed pain killers only to get cut off from the doctor & led down the dark & endless path of Heroin addiction.  They tell stories about the terrible things they did to maintain their habit & of loved ones they hurt along the way.  While I did horrible things as well, hurt & lost too many loved ones to addiction...this story is unlike any of the rest.  This is a story of addiction...obviously...but also one of organized crime, corruption, murder, extortion, jail/institutions, & love but mostly death.  

Every addiction specialist or rehab I have been to always had the same fault....they try to find some underlying reason as to why I started, “self medicating,” & attempt to address it.  I’ve had numerous heated arguments with councilors & doctors who insisted I was suppressing something deep down & may not even know it!  While I have heard of such instances to actually be the case I can very well tell you I am as normal as you are.  

I grew up in a child’s utopia in an upper-middle class suburb roughly 20 miles North of Detroit.  Think of the famous Tim Allen show, “Home Improvement.” Not only was I raised in Metro Detroit but I also come from a family of two parents, still married, & was the youngest of three boys.  I know most people’s perception of Detroit isn’t very high however in the 80′s & 90′s it was a great place to start a family.  Before the auto industry tanked most people skipped college to work on the assembly line at one of the, “Big Three,” (Ford, GM, or Chrysler) & lived comfortably.  My dad was a, “Safety Restraint Engineer,” for a subsidiary company with several patents still in use today!  We spent our days riding bikes through endless trails behind our house, building forts, playing back yard football, & camping in the backyard on warm summer nights.  My brothers & I were raised Catholic.  Went to Church every Sunday & Catechism on Thursday nights.  If I could change one thing about my childhood I wouldn’t.  It was that perfect!  My Father didn’t fail to raise a man...I failed to be the man he raised. 

When someone asks me why I started doing drugs I tell them because it was fun....simple as that.  I know it sounds cliche but it’s true, everyone was doing them.  My older brothers were way ahead of me, listening to Grateful Dead & dropping acid in middle school!  I just liked drugs a lot more than everyone else. My mother knew I had an addictive personality because I would take everything I did to the max & always looked for instant gratification.  I never wanted to wait/work for anything.  I think my brothers were aware of this as well because they would NEVER sell me pot in these early days.  They wouldn’t even talk to me about it.  So as far as being as normal as everyone else....maybe that one’s a stretch.  On the other hand I was years ahead of my classmates & understood how things worked much easier than the majority of my class.  

By the time I reached High School I was selling/smoking pot & hanging out with kids my age but it wasn’t long before I caught the attention of the older guys in the neighborhood.  I had already garnished a somewhat questionable reputation through my brothers by default & everyone knew my name from the paper route I had since I was roughly 12 years old.  At first they were intimidating & I hated whenever I had to deliver papers on one of their streets...praying they wouldn’t be outside playing basketball or something.  They always hung around the same two or three houses depending on who’s parents weren’t home that day.  If they saw me coming every one of them would stop what they were doing & aim their attention towards me.  All of them except one.  I knew his face & heard stories whispered about him in the hallways at school.  His name was Franco & he was not just the leader of their group...he was, “Head Fucking Hancho.”  You know the scene from mob movies where people from the neighborhood come to sit with the boss & ask him all kinds of favors in return for their loyalty?  That was Franco at age 15!  He had everyone’s respect....even that of my older brothers who looked up to nobody.  If you had a disagreement with Franco it didn’t go far.  I’ve seen him hit guys so hard they temporarily lost the ability to speak!  After a couple minutes of hazing from the guys he would shout from the porch telling them to leave me alone & they would scatter like roaches! 

These encounters would eventually lead up to my first drug deal.  Up until that point I had been stealing whatever I could from whichever brother wouldn’t notice at the time & smoking/selling it with & to my friends.  They eventually caught me & beat the living shit out of me.  I don’t think they were actually mad about the missing weed it was more about not stealing from your brother.  The same day I was caught stealing weed I planned on meeting several kids from school at a friends house & of course everyone was expecting me to bring the pot.  To this day I don’t know how I got the phone number or the guts to call it but I reached out to Franco’s best friend Mark.  I don’t really no why I chose him....any of the older guys could have found me weed.....but I knew Mark sold it regularly & to pretty much anyone.  There was no cell phones at this time so I had to call his house.  He wasn’t as angry as I expected & told me to wait 5 minutes before riding my bike towards his side of the neighborhood.  I did exactly as he instructed me to & before I could get to the end of my street he was pulling up in a dark green Ford Ranger...Frank was with him riding in the passenger seat.  Mark got out...threw my bike in the back of his truck telling me to hop in the backseat before getting back behind the wheel & pealing off.  The music was so loud I could barely understand the lyrics over the bass let alone what Frank & Mark were saying but it didn’t matter because they weren’t talking to me.  At the time I thought Mark must want to get out of the neighborhood before doing the deal but after getting to know him I learned...that was his, “thing”.  He loved to drive around, blaring music, & smoking weed with whoever was willing to tag along.  He hated driving alone & his truck was like his office.  Frank acted as if I wasn’t even there...holding a cool composure looking out the window while nodding his head to the music.  Eventually we pulled down a random street, where Mark turned down the music before pulling the truck over.  He turned around & asked me how much money I wanted to spend before opening a large grocery bag filled to the top with little, “dime bags,” or roughly a large gram of weed in each bag.  I don’t know if it was how he had them bagged up but it was more than I had ever seen in one place at the time & my brothers always had a lot.  I had a handful of crinkled five′s & one dollar bills I collected from my friends earlier in the day at school.  It came out to around $24.  I remember it was less than $25 because Mark insisted that an 8th cost $25 & that I was a dollar short.  I didn’t even know what an 8th was or how much it cost but didn't want to screw up my first deal so I pretended it was just an honest mistake & he threw three bags in my lap.  Franco asked where I was going & asked if I needed a ride which I humbly excepted.  

From that day on things changed little by little with every passing day.  I hung out less & less with the kids my age to be around Mark, Frank & the rest of the older guys.  They saw me as the kid who could sell a lot of weed since I already had that reputation from my classmates.  I saw them as a ticket to popularity.  In my mind it was an even trade.  My mother had an entirely different opinion.....constantly telling me I should be hanging around with my younger friends.  To me it was harmless....choosing to see it as normal for a kid my age.  I had no idea where this new found friendship would lead us.  I had no idea what I was getting myself into.  

As I was saying before....so much has happened since this day that I cannot even begin to piece it all together in a manner in which it flows conveniently into a timeline of events.  This is the beginning of my attempt & you will have to stick with me to learn more as I continue to publish.  I will warn you upfront that I will be changing some names, maybe even places or be vague as I am still getting death threats to this day & also don’t want to negatively impact any of the families that have already been ripped apart from unimaginable losses.  Lastly I am still weary about telling my story in it’s entirety.  I am sure those who are close to me will be able to figure out who I am since most of what I am going to tell you has never been a secret save one part.  I have never told ANYONE the FULL story other than my parents.  I feel it is the main reason I have struggled in all my attempts at telling/writing what actually happened.  Please understand that I take absolutely NO pride in the things I have done & only feel I need to document what I went through so maybe the next kid contemplating the path I chose....will rethink the decision.  I can tell you now their is no glory or honor in what we did & the end result was nothing but pain & suffering for our victims as well as ourselves.  I really hope nobody reads this the wrong way & that I am able to accurately portray the pain/anguish we caused so they realize how brainwashed we were & the impact you can have on others no matter how minor you think it is.  You have to stand up against what may seem to be the correct/hard decision at the time or even a harmless one that you know in your heart/gut is questionable & choose to do what you know to be right.  The definition of the word, “popular,” is; liked, admired, or enjoyed by many people or by a particular person or group.  The groups that are using/selling drugs are the minority & in the end you will find most are not truly your friend.  When I go on social media, looking back at all the kids I graduated with, I realize now that those who did well in school & actively participated were actually the, “cool kids.”  They are the ones posting pictures of new houses, nice cars & beautiful wives with blossoming families.  There is nothing cool about being alone & having nothing to show for the last two decades of your life but scars.  It is not romantic in any way shape or form.  You will not find comfort.  

Stay tuned for more to come! 

#addiction #drugs #illegal #heroin

[artificialqueens]

Galactica, Chapter 23 (Group Fic) - TheDane/Veronica

A/N: We know our posting schedule has gotten slower, but we hope you’re still enjoying the story. XOXO! Click here if you’re looking for previous chapters (or here if you’d rather read on AO3). 💫

Last Chapter: The Galactica afterparty brought people together in many different ways.  

This Chapter: NYFW comes to an end, and the team leaves for London, some more enthusiastically than others.

***

Ivy strolled through the courtyard at Bryant Park, on her way to deliver a charged battery pack to Raja before the Ralph Lauren show began, since Raja was as incapable of keeping her own alive as she was caring for the plants she continually adopted, all of that falling on Ivy - who fortunately didn’t mind, enjoying the relaxing tasks of caring for them as a break from the craziness of corporate life.

Most assistants as experienced as Ivy would be annoyed at doing this kind of menial delivery task, some probably even seeing it as demeaning, but Ivy was happy for the excuse to get out of the office and observe the colorful chaos of New York Fashion Week in person. Especially today, on the last day, when people from every walk of life seemed to converge in Bryant Park in a strange and glorious blend of humanity.

If Ivy was being honest with herself, she was quite the people watcher. She loved sitting back and collecting knowledge about others, not because she wanted to do anything with the information, but just to satisfy her own relentless curiosity, which was as much a part of her as the gap in her teeth.

She’d seen so much over the course of this week, so many things that she knew people probably had no idea she knew. She had watched her own boss quietly panic a few hours before the Galactica show, a look in her eyes that everyone else missed--people always assumed that Raja was 100% confident all the time, but Ivy knew better. She’d seen the way Pearl showed up every day looking more and more hungover, the young executive clearly going through something that she was desperately trying to party away. She’d noticed Violet at the party last night, slipping away with Sutan, one of her first glimpses ever into Violet’s personal life.

After dropping off the battery pack, Ivy took her time returning to the line of waiting taxis, taking in the eclectic group of people swarming around and she stopped to buy herself an iced coffee. She was leaning against the wall when she noticed someone staring at her. Ivy definitely recognized the other woman, a redhead with even brighter hair than her own, but she couldn’t place her, which made her feel slightly uncomfortable as the other didn’t look away, their eyes meeting across the courtyard. A fellow observer, she supposed.

Ivy smiled a little, deciding to take a chance on fate, and raised her hand to wave, and the other woman returning it with the brightest smile Ivy had ever seen.

***

“Remember to check with the hotel if they have washed the sheets correctly. You know I can’t tolerate perfume.”

“Yes Miss.” Violet nodded as she jotted down the last of what Fame had asked her. They were leaving the last show of the week, the sun going down as Fame walked towards her car.

“And what about Monday?”

“Your travel itinerary is printed, packed and ready to go. I even emailed it to Mr. Bertschy.”

“Good.” Fame looked at Violet, her sunglasses perched in her blonde hair, and for a moment, just a moment, it almost seemed like Fame was smiling.

“That’s all.”

***

Courtney swayed a bit to the music in the crowded club. It was Saturday: New York Fashion Week was officially over, and on Monday, her boss was flying to Europe for three weeks. Three amazing weeks where she wouldn’t have to run around like a maniac fetching coffee or jumping up in fear every time she heard footsteps or trying to read her mind while on the receiving end of a withering glare.

“Uh oh…”

“What?” Courtney asked, seeing Willam’s furrowed brow.

“Four o’clock. Someone better call the wedgie police, because...yikes.”

Courtney giggled, turning her gaze in the direction Willam gestured and then immediately covering her face.

“Oh god, that looks painful!”

“I bet she’s bleeding.”

Courtney laughed harder. She’d been having a surprisingly good time with Willam; in spite of her apprehension about him, it wasn’t awkward at all. She felt comfortable, almost like she was with one of her girlfriends. He was funny and charming and when she said she was thinking about going vegan, didn’t make an annoyed face. He simply took out his phone and searched for the best vegan restaurants in the neighborhood.

He’d treated her to a pretty good dinner, where he’d again listened kindly while she vented about work, and then they’d made the short walk to the club, where Sólseturstríðsmenn was about to perform.

The best thing about Willam so far, though, was that he was such a perfect gentleman. He wasn’t trying to get her drunk, or getting handsy like most guys. He was treating her like a person, which Courtney supposed shouldn’t have been such a brand new experience on a date, but here she was.

“So, I know you said that you’re a lightweight, but I’m gonna grab another drink. You want one?”

“Um...yeah, okay,” Courtney said with a smile. “Why not?”

As he headed towards the bar, Courtney watched him closely, trying to gauge her attraction. As different as he was from the boys she’d dated in the past, there was something oddly compelling about him. She found her eyes drifting down to his ass--which wasn’t flat like most guys, but rounded, almost peachy, and Courtney wondered what it would feel like to just grab ahold of it. She looked away quickly, her cheeks growing hot.

She wondered if he would try to kiss her tonight. She didn’t love the idea of a beard against her face, but he did have full, soft lips, and maybe it would be nice. Maybe she did like Willam. Wouldn’t it be crazy to date a boy who didn’t make her sigh with irritation when his name came up on the caller ID?  

When he returned with the drinks, she accepted hers gratefully and beamed up at him.

“What?” he asked, those pretty blue eyes looking at her with amused curiosity.

“I was just thinking about what a good time I’m having,” said Courtney.

“Why do you sound so surprised?” he laughed. “I’m a very fucking good time.”

Courtney gave a cute shrug, then giggled, taking his arm and leaning a head on his shoulder. Maybe she should have tried dating a guy who wasn’t an absolute dickhead much sooner.

***

“You’re such a brat,” Pearl laughed, sipping a beer as she watched Trixie stuff clothes into his suitcase, pouting the whole time.

He had really hoped to avoid Europe this year, or at least be able to cut his trip short. But instead, Fame had decided that it was important for the whole senior creative team to be there the entire time, to absorb the inspiration. As if he couldn't get all the inspiration he needed right here in New York.

Trixie looked up at Pearl with a scowl.

“Don’t you have your own packing to do?” he asked.

“It takes me exactly 4 minutes to pack,” Pearl told him, a smirk on her face. “When you’re this perfect, everything looks good together.”

“All black everything helps too.”

“I have whites.”

“Whatever.” Trixie rolled his eyes.

“I don’t know why you’re pouting, man. It’s three weeks in Europe, paid for by the company. Partying on someone else’s dime.” Pearl flipped her long blonde hair over her shoulder. “It’s the dream.”

“I don’t like partying.”

“You used to like partying,” Pearl said, adding, “You used to be cool.”

“Well, I guess I’m just not cool anymore!” Trixie snapped, just as Katya appeared in the doorway.

“Of course you’re cool, baby,” she cooed. “The coolest cat in the joint.”

Pearl burst out laughing, and Trixie crossed his arms.

“Are you mocking me now, too?”

“Nooo, never!” Katya dropped down to her knees beside him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. “And just to show you how great I think you are, I’m making a special lunch just for you.”

“Oh yeah?” Trixie asked, suddenly interested.

“Uh huh…” Katya rubbed his back. “Now, I’ve never tasted this regional delicacy myself, but I have it on good authority that it’s one of your very favorites. It’s called ‘Tater Tot Hotdish.’”

“What? Tater Tot Hotdish? Seriously?” Trixie clapped his hands excitedly.

“Yes, baby, and I made enough for you to take a big old portion with you on the place tomorrow.”

“God, you’re the absolute best,” Trixie said, taking Katya’s face in his hands and laying a kiss on her. “I’m gonna miss you so much.”

“Aww, I’ll miss you too, along with the goods.” Katya squeezed his ass, giggling.

Trixie pulled back to study her face. She seemed normal, but he’d noticed her getting up early lately, meeting one of her friends from rehab in the mornings before work. They’d been together long enough for him to know that these things came in cycles, and getting some extra support was nothing to panic over, but with both him and Pearl leaving town at the same time, he couldn’t help but worry.

“Are you gonna be okay while we’re gone? Really?”

“Of course I am, sugarbutt.” Katya gave him one of her signature 1000-watt smiles. “Now, excuse me, I need to go check on your tots.”

He watched her go, still not entirely convinced. Maybe it would be a good idea for someone to check on her while he was away. Someone responsible and trustworthy...

***

Violet saw her work phone vibrate out of the corner of her eye, her screen lighting up. She tried to read it, tried to make out who had contacted her, when she was pulled out of her thoughts.

“Am I not entertaining enough?”

Violet turned to look, Sutan’s warm voice loud and clear, a smirk on his lips. They were eating breakfast at a cafe near his apartment, a plate of half eaten avocado on rye in front of her, while Sutan had opted for waffles and scrambled eggs.

“Of course.”

It had been Violet’s idea to meet up for breakfast before Sutan had to leave. She had meant to come over, had meant to spend more time with him, but the week had flown by, and suddenly it had passed without the two of them actually seeing each other.

“I just need-” Violet bit her lip and titled her phone, surprise hitting her when she saw that Trixie was the one who had texted. “Oh. I have to-”

“Lovely eyes-” Violet looked at him again, Sutan’s elbow leaning on the table, his fingers around a steaming hot cup of coffee. “What could possibly be more important than me?”

“Work.”

“Ow.” Sutan laughed, holding a hand to his heart, and Violet felt a surge of embarrassment crash over her.

“Sorry,” Violet hadn’t meant to be so blunt, hadn’t meant to dismiss him so harshly, “I didn’t-”

Her phone vibrated again, and Violet saw that she had gotten a second message from Trixie.

“I have to-”

“Ignore me if you must,” Sutan was clearly entertained by it, his tone teasing, “but know that I’m not usually treated like this Miss Chachki.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

Violet opened the texts, quickly scanning them.

TRIXIE: Hi Violet. I was wondering if you could do me a favor? While I’m in Europe, do you mind checking in on Katya?

TRIXIE: Just once or twice if you have time.

Violet bit her lip. She considered Katya someone she liked, maybe even a friend if the blonde agreed, but she wasn’t sure and that she was close enough to check in on her, whatever that meant.

TRIXIE: You could bring her dinner? She likes chinese.

“So,” Sutan titled his head, his foot on tapping against her shin.  “Is it important?”

Sutan’s voice was still warm, his tone still light, but Violet didn’t want to push him any further, didn’t want to risk him getting annoyed or tired. Violet flipped her phone, turning the screen to the table. “It’s not an emergency.”

“Good,” Sutan chuckled, and Violet felt her stomach do a flip, the man stupidly attractive when he was laughing, his dark eyes ones she swore she could drown in. “I was worried for a minute that Fame had remembered she was flying tomorrow.”

“Ah,” Violet hid a smile behind her teacup.

“I’m just happy that I’m on an entirely different flight.”

She had never seen Fame on a plane, but she had heard first hand experiences from senior staff who had been with her, and had even helped her prepare more than once.

“Speaking about phones though-” Sutan smirked.

“We weren’t-“

“I looked for you on Instagram.”

Violet raised an eyebrow, her food still forgotten on her plate. “Why?”

“Because I enjoy your company?” Sutan chuckled, and Violet realized that she was being unnecessarily harsh once again, but she didn’t like that Sutan had gone looking for information about her, her chest tightening. “I couldn’t find you, do you have a nickname or somethi-”

“I don’t have an account.”

“Violet,” Sutan leaned back in his chair, “Just because I wasn’t upset about the assistant thing doesn’t mean I’m okay with you lying.”

“I’m not lying.”

“Please.” Sutan rolled his eyes, actually sounding annoyed now. “Why wouldn’t you-“

“I don’t use social media.” Violet ran her fingers through her hair, looking directly at Sutan. “I don’t have time.”

She wasn’t lying. When everyone else had jumped on the social media train, Violet had been busy, so she had never gotten on Myspace or Twitter or Instagram or whatever else people had profiles on. When Violet applied to Parsons, she had even deactivated the Facebook her mom had made her make when she moved to New York, the decision almost making itself.

Her lack of social media was one of the reasons she became friends with Pearl, the blonde absolutely fascinated by the fact that the only way she could reach Violet was by email or text.

She wasn’t unaware of the online world, Pearl keeping her in the loop of trends, and she sometimes used the office computer to look at pugs on Youtube, but all in all, Violet simply wasn’t interested in creating her own content.

“Do you promise?”

Violet was happy with being anonymous, was very happy that she didn’t exist online, and she intended to keep it that way for as long as she possibly could.

“I promise,” Violet nodded, leaning over the table to give Sutan a quick, closed mouthed kiss.

***

“Darling,” Fame tightened her grip, the fabric of Patrick’s jacket between her fingers. The hustle and bustle of the airport was all around them, and Fame wished she could disappear.  “Look at me.”

Fame huffed, turning her head and nuzzling further into Patrick’s neck.

“I know you’re upset-” Patrick ran a hand up her back.

To say that she was upset was an understatement. In fact, she was livid, anxiety and anger like a storm inside of her. She knew it wasn’t fair, knew she was being a child, but she didn’t want to fly without Patrick, didn’t want to risk her life without her husband at her side.

She had asked him to come along, had been ready to beg, but Patrick had work, had his own company to run, and it wasn’t fair of Fame to expect him to get on a transAtlantic flight with her, just so she didn’t have to do it alone.

“You’ll be fine.”

Fame sighed, the scent of Patrick filling her nose. They were waiting for Raja and Raven, Raja ready to take her hand and not let go until they touched down in London.

Fame knew that Raven hated it, but she could live with the stink eyes and Raven’s pouting if it meant that she had one of the few people she trusted by her side the entire time she was off the ground.

***

Courtney typed at lightning speed, adding the last three messages into Miss Fame’s phonesheet, then clicked back over to continue checking her emails.

Since most of the senior executives were on a plane to London, she had been expecting a chill morning, but it was the exact opposite: the phone was ringing off the hook: press requests for interviews and to borrow pieces of the collection, invitations, buyers, influencers. Not to mention the flurry of activity within the company to get the ready to wear versions of the Spring line into stores. Courtney could barely read one email before three more came in, she and Violet in constant communication as they made sure nothing slipped through the cracks.

The one saving grace was that apparently, it was tradition for things around the office to get much more casual while Fame and the others were away, and so she was wearing jeans, sneakers, and a cute Lululemon top.

The clothes were such a huge bonus that Courtney didn’t even mind that Violet had sent her to marketing three times: running up and down the stairs in sneakers was a hell of a lot nicer than doing it in heels.

Courtney was almost finished catching up on her emails when Violet stood up.

“I’m getting a cup of tea, do you want anything?”

Courtney looked up with a smile, thrilled that she and Violet were getting along so well today. Although the frenzied activity was a bit overwhelming for her, Violet seemed to thrive in it, and thus her patience had increased about two thousand percent.

“Um, I’ll take coconut water, if we have any. Thanks,” Courtney said, and Violet nodded, ducking into the kitchen.

The phone rang once again, and Courtney answered it, picking up her notepad and a pen. “Miss Fame’s office…”

“Hi, Bianca Del Rio for Fame.”

“I’m sorry, she’s unavailable right now, may I take a message?” Courtney asked sweetly. She couldn’t help wondering if Bianca might possibly recognize her voice, and found her cheeks coloring slightly at the thought.

“Oh shit. She’s on the plane to London now, huh?”

“Umm…” Courtney knew that she wasn’t supposed to reveal exactly where Fame was, but it was one of her closest friends, so maybe it would be okay. She settled on a slightly evasive, “...Possibly.”

Bianca laughed. “Very good work, Courtney. Protecting your boss’s privacy. I love it.”

“I do my best,” Courtney said, trying to suppress the grin she couldn’t seem to help whenever Bianca paid her a compliment. She wasn’t sure why, though, since Bianca obviously couldn’t see her, but even so… “Did you want to leave a message?”

“Nah...I’ll just text her,” Bianca said. “Bye, Courtney. Have a good day.”

“Bye, Bianca. You too.” Courtney hung up, just as Violet’s head appeared in the doorway, irritation all over her face.

“That better not have been Bianca Del Rio,” Violet said, a hand on her hip.

“Umm…”

“Courtney! We’ve been over this. You need to show people more respect. She’s the editor-in-chief of Marie-Claire, for god’s sake!”

“I know, but I…” Courtney trailed off, biting her lip. She wasn’t sure how to explain to Violet how wrong it would’ve felt to address Bianca as ‘Ms. Del Rio’ like she was supposed to. It was so stiff and formal, and their relationship felt much more casual than that. Courtney blushed, realizing that even the word ‘relationship’ was an overstatement. She was probably just being stupid, should probably just listen to Violet and shut up. “I’m sorry, I’ll remember next time.”

“You better,” Violet said. “Because if Miss Fame had heard that, she would’ve been livid.”

Courtney nodded, and Violet seemed satisfied with that, handing over the bottle of coconut water.

***

In the nearly four years that Ivy had worked for Raja, she’d lost count of the number of times people expressed amazement that the infamous “Dragon Lady” had managed to hold onto an assistant for so long.

In spite of Raja’s deserved reputation for being tough, Ivy felt immensely lucky to be working for her. For one thing, she was smart and insanely talented. And while she was by no means soft or low maintenance, Ivy always found her to be fair--even generous, when the situation warranted it. And the fact that she respected Ivy so much, often asking her for her opinions and consulting with her about important decisions, meant a lot--as did the trust she put in her to handle many things on her own. They had a system, and it worked for both of them.

But all that said, Ivy still enjoyed the few times a year when her boss was out of town. For one thing, it was nice to be more in control of her own schedule, and for another, it gave her the opportunity to work on one of her absolute favorite tasks: organizing the deep storage in one of their downstairs warehouses.

The styling closet next to Raja’s office was relatively easy to keep up with. Sure, it got a little messy at times, but if she stayed late or came in early every few weeks, she could manage. But the warehouse was another animal entirely. It often became the dumping ground for everything from design, referred to with nicknames like the Bermuda Triangle and the Couture Graveyard.

It was Ivy’s job to keep everything neat and labeled, and with how rare it was for her to get large amounts of time to handle it, this was no small feat. Right now, her task was to meticulously label and store every piece from the runway show, and to update her system to track the loans. She always felt a little bad about the cast-offs. In the past, they saved every garment, even the ones that were not approved, usually all smushed together in one extra-large garment bag--but this collection had about 10 times the amount of these little orphaned pieces as usual.

The three weeks of European Fashion Week were truly the greatest; all of senior management was  gone, which meant that the support staff could wear whatever they wanted to the office. Ivy was personally dressed in something she would never get caught dead in with Raja in the office, but sneakers and jeans were perfect for dancing along to Taylor Swift and moving heavy boxes as she got down to the nitty gritty of cleaning the warehouse.

#rpdr fanfiction #thedane #veronica #galactica #witney #trixya #vitan #bitney #violet chachki #courtney act #miss fame #raja gemini #ivy winters #willam belli #pearl liaison #trixie mattel #katya zamolodchikova #bianca del rio #lesbian au #m/f au #fashion au

[twriteskpop]

Adrenaline // Jeon Jungkook AU pt 2

Warnings: marijuana use, sexual harassment

Word count: 3k+

The park was 20 minutes away from her apartment complex,  which meant that she had no time to go up to her apartment and change first. She shifted into reverse and made her way to the park.  

The park was mostly empty during the summer time,  so it was no surprise to her that only a few cars were parked by the water.  She found a parking space on the other side of the lot,  and brought out her phone.  

Here. Yellow VW Beatle

She watched as a child threw bread crumbs at a duck in the pond.  Something Floridian children did often.  The ducks aren't supposed to be fed,  but it's like a right of passage in Florida.  The little girl was dressed in a cute denim dress,  matching hat as well.  Her mother was knelt beside her,  keeping a hand on her shoulder to make sure she didn't fall in. The girl threw the bread crumbs happily to the ducks,  pointing at the ones eating.  It was such an innocent moment between mother and daughter.  One Delilah never had but witnessed too often. 

Her thoughts were broke by a knock on the passenger side window. She looked through the window to see a person holding their phone to the glass.  It was the text thread.  This was Clarissa's dealer. She unlocked the door and the man got in. He was nothing she expected.  He was handsome. He had on blue jeans and a long black shirt.  His hair was slightly covering his face. When he turned to her,  she couldn't help but feel a butterfly in her stomach.  He was extremely handsome.  His nose was predimanent,  his eyes sweet but focused on the task at hand.  His skin was clear and smooth and he was somehow cute but hot all at once.  

Her thoughts were,  thankfully, by him putting his hand out for her to shake.  "I'm Jungkook.  You're Clarissa and Bennett's friend?" He asked,  a kind tone in his soft voice.  Delilah nodded once,  pulling her wallet out.  She had never been infatuated with anyone before,  but the looks alone this man had was effecting her train of thought.  Sure,  she had boyfriends but they were pity dates she had with them.  She had never felt physically attracted to anyone before,  so this sudden nervousness made her uneasy. 

"my name is Delilah. Sorry I was late,  I was getting off of work," She explained turning to him.  He raised his brow and half smirked,  "you work at one of the theme parks?" Delilah looked down at her uniform and instantly felt embarrassed.  "Sadly,  no.  I work at Timmy's 50's, " She explained,  adding some annoyance to the diner name.  It was cheesy and showed how self centered her boss was. He chuckled and nodded,  "interesting. Anyways,  what will it be?" She thought back to the strain she used to go off of, even though she never really paid much attention.  Whatever she could get before she smoked,  regardless. However she did remember friend in high school was regular on indica strains called… "9 pound hammer,  or grape ape?" She asked.  He smirked flicking a brow up high,  smirking at her,  "good taste.  I have grape ape right now.  Usually it's pretty random,  for future reference.  You're in luck.  It's 20 a G. " Delilah pulled out her purse and pulled a 20 dollar bill out of her phone case,  it had the smell of maple syrup on it because it was a tip from a messy table with kids that same day. She passed it to Jungkook,  trying not to look into his deep brown eyes too long.  

They exchanged the money for a dime bag of the green,  with slight purple specs,  substance.  He placed the money in his wallet and placed his hand on the handle of the car door.  He paused,  turned to look at her with a cute, bunny-like smile,  and stated,  "it was a pleasure,  Delilah.  I hope we meet again soon." As quickly as he entered her car,  he was gone. 

His scent was of sweet Cologne,  definitely something expensive by how it wasn't too strong to notice at first,  but lingered like a ghost.  

She placed the dime bag into her purse and drove back to her apartment.  She couldn't help but think about the way Jungkook had left butterflies in her stomach.  Who knows,  it could just be nerves from the sale after so long of quitting.  Yeah,  that's exactly what Delilah insisted on as she made her way into her apartment and into a hot shower,  washing the diner smells away along with the phantom touches left from Tims daily harassment.  

When she exited the shower,  sliding on her denim shorts and baggy T-shirt,  she remembered something crucial to her dire need to forget her thoughts,  she hadn't had a grinder or anything to smoke from. Sure,  she could create a soda can bowl,  if she hadn't given up soda her first year of college.  

Thankfully,  she felt relieved to see she had one wrapped cookie left from Clarissa the night prior.  As she unwrapped the single cookie and placed it on a napkin,  and then into the microwave,  she texted Clarissa. 

So,  met Jungkook.  Problem arises,  nothing to grind or smoke with.  😪 

 Seconds later the buzzing started in her phone. Clarissa had been calling her. 

Clarissa was laughing and cheerful, per usual, “D! Come over! I have plenty of old pieces you can take. Smoke with us tonight. We have been wanting to smoke with you for a while, but loved hanging out with you without smoking too. You’re our closest friend!” She continued to ramble on, “Anyways, movie night. Going to smoke and watch… something. We still havent decided, come over!” Before Delilah could protest, there was more laughter and the phone hung up. She huffed out a sigh. 

She hadn’t...smoked in so long. The night prior it was an edible. She had been alone. Was she ready to smoke with other people around again? She was always introverted,  until she smoked. She shrugged the thought off,  thinking too much.  She would at least smoke for free and have a cookie and two grams left at home.  

She slipped on her white adidas and walked over to Clarissa's place,  not bothering to knock,  they asked her not to many times because she was like family.  The familiar smell of weed hit her like a snack in the face.  It was strong and the foggy smoke was rolling out the door behind her.  

Clarissa was rushing to the door, a smile plastered on her round face.  She gripped Delilah's wrist and pulled her happily to the living room.  There were three people in the living room,  lounging on the couch and flipping through Netflix.  One, Bennet a largely buff man with pale white skin and bald head,  but friendly face,  was arguing with the two other men.  Delilah's eyes landed on Jungkook.  He was wearing the same clothes from earlier that day,  a smile plastered on his face,  making his nose crinkle in a cute bunny-like way.  He had been telling Bennet to pick a better movie than the kissing booth.  Bennet may look frighteningly intimidating but he was just a big teddy bear.  The other face was unfamiliar. It was another man of Asian decent with bleached blonde hair and dimples when he smiled.  His eyes were slightly hooded,  but it made his stare seductive.  

"So I heard you met Jungkook earlier but this is RM,  another one of our friends. Follow me to the room,  I have a whole set you can keep. Had it for years but you can clean them," Clarissa stood taller than Delilah but she was in an excited,  bent-knee type position while talking.  It looked as though Clarissa had been waiting for this moment.  As if it were the missing puzzle piece to Delilah's personality.  In the moment,  it slightly burned her soul,  but she brushed it off,  as she did most hurtful things.  

Clarissa had a small cardboard box on her red blanketed bed,  the contents inside were like a smoker starter kit.  A silver grinder with a  rhinestone galaxy as the lid,  a beautiful glass blown chillum,  bowl, a tray and a palm tree bong. Every one of the contents looked warn but the thought was extreme.  "I'll venmo you $100 for this.  It's too sweet," Delilah wrapped her arm around her friend in a side hug.  Clarissa smacked Delilahs arm,  leaving a stinging sensation,  "don't you dare.  You're family." Clarissa turned around and made her way back to the living room. Delilah pulled out her phone and opened the venmo app,  paying Clarissa,  before following behind.  Delilah placed the cardboard shoe box of stuff on the counter and reached for a water in the fridge.  

"Titanic?  What are you a woman?" RM had snatched the remote from Bennet,  laughing.  Clarissa had been seated next to Bennet,  snuggled under his arm,  passing the blunt to Jungkook. lunt to RM who was sitting beside the couple on the small, three person couch. On the two seater, Jungkook was sitting with his elbows on his knees, staring up at Delilah. That feeling in her stomach soon returned.  She turned her attention to the bean bag in the corner, it was either sitting closely to Jungkook, or on the bean bag. She pulled the bean bag to a spot between the tv and the couch, plopping herself down comfortably. “Can we just pick a movie?” Clarissa snatched the remote from RM.  She flipped on a random movie. Delilah giggled when the movie began, seeing the title name. “Of all the movies Clarissa, you had to pick the one based in Orlando?” Delilah laughed, throwing a pillow at Clarissa. Bennet blocked it from hitting her. “I’m a sucker for bring it on movies and this is the only one on netflix,” Clarissa retorted. Delilah face palmed internally. She had been a cheerleader most of her life, competition cheer as well. Mostly on fundraisers because her family had been critically homeless most of her life. Bring it On movies were her guilty pleasure, she was glad clarissa felt the same way. 

“is this one of those cheerleader films?  Oh Lord," Bennet placed his hand on his face and took the blunt from RM,  "I think we are all going to need a ton of this. She likes to act these cheers out." The room started laughing,  but Clarissa lifted a perfectly sculpted brow at Delilah, "yeah laugh all you want but I think our girl D knows this movie just like I do. How'd you know this one was based in our city?" Delilah could feel the blood rushing to her cheeks.  She was embarrassed.  She was not sure if she wanted everyone knowing her past. Clarissa and Bennet knew, but she hadn’t known the other two men enough. So, she flicked her brow up and winked, not saying anything. 

The blunt was now in jungkooks hand, he took two long puffs and passed it to Delilah. Before she could reach for it,  Bennet stopped Jungkook, "she doesn't smoke.  Sorry D,  he didn't know." Delilah and Clarissa both began giggling like a set of school girls with a secret.  "I did say that she met our boy JK earlier. I wanted to see the look on your face when you found out, " Clarissa laughed. Jungkook passed Delilah the blunt but it was down to the last hit. She held it in her hand, staring down at it.  Everyone was busy laughing atBennets cluelessness,  so they hadn't noticed that Delilah was trying to decide if she really wanted to take that nose dive back into the cycle. She made a promise she wouldn't do it again.  Maybe she could alter that promise.  She loved being able to sleep the night prior. Not thinking too hard. Maybe she could have the best of both worlds.  Just make responsible decisions while getting rid of the bomb of memories in her mind. That is exactly what she-

"Delilah?" Jungkook had broken her train of thought,  he had done that many times in one day.  She felt the pain instantly and placed it in the ash tray.  She had burnt the tip of her pointer finger and thumb. The blunt had burned out.  She rubbed the burn on her shirt and it had only stung for a second. "How about you guys spark up a bowl while I help Delilah with the burn, " Jungkook stood up,  gripping her wrist,  pulling her up before she could protest.  She didn't like people treating her like she was weak.  It was just a small burn.  The sting did linger as they walked through the kitchen archway.  He opened the fridge and pulled out the tub of butter,  scooping a tiny bit with a spoon and forcefully putting it on her fingers.  "I'm fine.  Thank you. It's just a small burn," Delilah turned the butter with the two fingers as jungkook washed the spoon.  "You looked lost. Bennet said you don't smoke? Is this your first time?" Jungkook leaned against the counter,  a palm of each hand supporting him. 

"Because a first timer could handle the strains I asked for,  let alone know the names?" She laughed sarcastically lifting a brow at the beautiful man.  He let out a chuckle and nodded,  "fair point. So what was getting to you?" She hasn't wanted to tell him her whole life story,  as he was a complete stranger.  However,  the look in his eye showed a sense of caring. His eyes had a glass like glisten and they wandered the depths of her soul they were staring so hard into hers.  She felt that feeling in her stomach and she had to force herself to look to the fridge.  She kept it short and simple,  "I quit about 14 months ago when I moved here.  My decisions weren't always…. Thought out.  Now I think too much so today… " He took a step forward and placed his hand on her mid back,  the feeling in her stomach intensified.  He turned her around and slightly pushed her from the kitchen archway,  moved around her,  looked back to whisper,  "I'll watch over you.  You're with friends now.  If you want to be?" She nodded and they made their way back to the living room.  She sat back down on the bean bag chair and thought briefly about the effect that sentence had on her.  Of course she'd want to be his friend after that.  Even RM seemed cool.  If Bennet and Clarissa were close with these two,  she trusted their opinions more than anyone. So she decided to let herself go.  

Clarissa had hit play on the movie and just as Bennet said,  began reciting the beginning.  The blue,  glassblown pipe went around the living room and made it to Delilah,  who no longer hesitated.  She took the lighter and pressed the bowl against her lips,  warm to the touch.  She went to light the lighter,  but the tip of her thumb was burnt and made her feel like a hot knife cut into her.  "Fuck! " She exclaimed,  shaking her hand.  Jungkook got up from his spot on the couch and sat on the floor next to her.  He reached for the lighter and motioned for her to press the bowl back to her mouth.  After a slight moment of hesitation,  she did so.  He carefully lit the lighter and held it against the green packed substance in the bowl of the pipe.  She breathed in,  letting the smoke slowly warm her lungs,  until she couldn't take it and tapped jungkooks hand with her free one. She cleared the pipe and held in the smoke.  She could feel slightly more relaxed and her body became weightless in a sense.  She was no longer nervous that jungkook was so close to her.  She passed the bowl to Bennet who was next and firSt in the  rotation.  She turned,  thanked jungkook.  "I told you I'd watch out for you." He winked,  making her heart flutter as if a whole tree shook off its fall leaves in preparation for winter,  but in her heart.  The effect he had on her showed,  she wasn't a light weight so she still had thought about that fact.  

Clarissa stood up and began doing the pool cheer off cheer.  Her form waoff and she was making everyone laugh and clap at the same time. She made the movie entertaining even for the guys and it had just begun. "Delilah… you know the movie? Explain why you're laughing and not here doing it with me?" Clarissa paused the movie,  taking her hit as she stood next to the tv in the large living room.  Bennet let out a loud cackle,  "okay rissa,  maybe not everyone watches it a billion times?" The other two guys laughed.  

The overall environment was comfortable and welcoming,  and with the help of medicating,  she felt comfortable enough with her friends to finally admit one thing about her life.  Sure,  Clarissa and Bennet already knew most of the dark stuff that happened to Delilah in her past,  but they hadn't known she used to cheer.  

"Your form is off," Delilah laughed.  Clarissa flicked her brow up,  "what do you know about form? I cheered all four years of high school!" Delilah nodded,  "fair enough.  Try… cheer competition squads since the age of 3,  working through fundraisers to pay her dues to stay on the squad." Clarissa opened her mouth widely smiling,  "no way!  Girl,  you HAVE TO DO THE CHEERS WITH ME! " she squealed in a high pitched voice.  The guys in the room all agreed and took turns pleading at Delilah. They saw it as entertainment.  Delilah shook her head.  She wasn't sure she wanted to be that vulnerable just yet. 

"If you do this, RM,  Bennet and I will do one cheer of choice," Jungkook pleaded,  gripping Delilah's arm gently pulling at her like a child.  She huffed out a sigh,  how could she pass that up? "Fine,  hand me the bowl.  I'm too sober to do this, " She threw the lighter to jungkook who quickly lit the bowl for her.  After a second of letting the medication kick in,  she felt loose in body,  mind,  and soul.  She pushed herself up off the bean bag chair and stood next to Clarissa after kicking her shoes to the corner.  Thankfully, they lived on the first floor so no one would complain.  The guys clapped and began the movie.  

Delilah and Clarissa began cheering every cheer to the movie,  while the guys watched laughing hysterically and occasionally impressed.  "Alright I did it, " Delilah plopped down on the bean bag after the credits rolled.  Clarissa pulled jungkook,  Bennet and RM all up from their spots one-by-one. 

"I'm thinking the pool cheer off.  I'd love to see our guys prance and dosey doe," Clarissa quoted from the movie.  Delilah nodded vigorously. "Hop up there guys you have 10 minutes to practice while D and I go to her apartment to put her pieces away, " Clarissa informed,  throwing Delilah her shoes back,  putting on her own adidas. Delilah grabbed the box on the counter and they exited to Delilah's apartment.  The air was significantly fresher than the apartment they were just in.  She didnt have decorations so even though it was the same floor plan,  hers looked bigger.  

Delilah placed the box in her kitchen cabinet and looked out on her open balcony. Tuck was laying down enjoying the afternoon sun.  "Tuck can come inside if he wants.  I bought a water bowl about a month ago for when he's over on my porch," Delilah pointed to the door,  pulling her phone our of her pocket.  "What a mess this cheer will be, " Clarissa laughed,  peaking over the railing to her apartment. "Oh god," Delilah complained.  Her phone was filled with texts from Tim. He wanted her to cover the dinner rush as soon as the lunch rush was over.  Apparently the other waitresses were going to some party at UCF. Tim always let the other waitresses ditch as much as they wanted,  because the diner was never too busy for one person to handle. It was in a part of town that the tourists never went,  because it was opposite side of the theme parks.  The other waitresses also allowed Tim to grope them and even play into it. They were around the same age as Delilah,  but both were in college while Delilah dropped out of community college to move back.  So,  whenever they didn't want to work,  Tim brought in Delilah.  She needed this job so she always obeyed.  

"I guess you're going to have to enjoy the cheer alone.  I have to head back to work," Delilah threw up her hair quickly while explaining to Clarissa,  who followed her to her room as Delilah changed back into her uniform.  "Heather and Maddy are going to another party?" Clarissa asked,  anger surrounding her usually peppy voice.  Delilah nodded,  pulling her poodle skirt and matching white shirt back on.  

"It's not fair.  The way he treats you.  He shouldn't be harassing anyone of you but the fact the other girls let him so they still get paid to ditch?" Clarissa rambled.  Delilah could feel the rage in the room as if it were fog.  Delilah placed her hands on Clarissa's bony shoulders as Clarissa sat on Delilah's bed.  "Honey,  it's why I can afford this apartment,  my car,  bills,  and still have some money left I save up for an annual pass to the parks.  Tonight's shift tips should get me just enough to buy one on Monday," Delilah reassured her friend. "Come by for dinner if you're too afraid he will act up.  Foods on me, " She convinced Clarissa.  As Delilah grabbed her purse Clarissa followed her out the front door, holding tucks collar. "Fine.  We will drop by later.  I'm bringing the guys.  You're high as a kite though so… be careful okay? " Delilah nodded once and made her way to work.  Being high the traffic didn't bother her so much.  

--------------------------------------

A/N

I'm loving this so much.  I have so much planned.  Please leave comments on where I can improve,  what you love,  and what you want with the story!  

-T

#bts #bts jeon jungguk #jeon jungkook #jungkook #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #rm bts #rm smut #namjoon #jungkook imagine #bts imagines #bts x reader #bts fluff #bts jungkook #bts icons #bts fanfic #bts fanclub #bts fanfction

[howtohero]

#276 The Self-Help Guide for Child Sidekicks

It has come to our attention that despited our best efforts and repeated attempts to prevent such things, many superheroes are still employing child sidekicks. (Read: child soldiers in their war on crime.) This is, obviously, still a horrible idea as most supervillain attacks are home to poison fumes, fear toxins, zombie carnivores and lots of loose knives, all things that children are famously not supposed to be around. And yet, we’ve seen time and time again that superheroes will actively recruit children, usually orphans, to help them fight crime. (I guess you can still call it a “one-man crusade on crime” if the person you’re waging it with is not a man but a child.) So, we’ve decided that it’s time for a new approach. Today we’re going to reach out directly to the children... Children still read advice blogs right? (Definitely.)

So, hello children, how are you today? Gleefully beating up henchmen in dark alleys? Kicking terrorists in the shins? Fab fab fab. Now, how would you like to stop doing all of that because, as it would turn out, all that stuff is extremely dangerous and you are a child and that is not the kind of stuff you should be doing at all. And look, I get it, you’ve got incredible powers, or a knack for kick flips, or an insatiable thirst for justice, and that’s great. Your heart is definitely in the right place. Nobody understands the desire to use your incredible powers for good at such a young age better than me. (Except, probably, for people who actually have superpowers at a young age.) But you’re simply not ready to go out into the field and busting skulls quite yet. Instead you should take this time to hone your abilities so that when it comes time for you to enter the crime fighting world you can start out as an experienced and professional hero who doesn’t accidentally blow up a school or get gross webbing everywhere.

As a young superhuman it is important that you don’t allow yourself to be swayed by the rhetoric of established superheroes. They’re going to tell you that you can be a valuable asset in the field, and that many supervillains are actually terrified of ten-year-olds in tights but don’t listen to them! They are most likely lying. (There is, admittedly, a thirty percent chance that they’re actually just stupid, lotta stupid superheroes out there. More than you’d think.) Trust me, all they’re thinking about is securing their legacy. They just want you to train you to be just like them so that you can take over their superhero identity when they retire or die or get shunted into another dimension. And I’m gonna let you in a little secret, they’re never going to retire and pass their mantle on to you. It’s a false promise! You’re just going to be another in a long line of proteges, apprentices, and sidekicks that get led on until you somehow grow older than the hero you’re working for. Don’t believe me? At the time of this writing there have been 388 different Hatboys. Anyone have a guess as to how many Hatmans (Hatmen?) there have been during that time? It’s 1. Hatman has always been Hatman. Still don’t believe me? Let’s take a look at what’s happened to some of those Hatboys.

Hatboy #1: Went to college. (Nerd.) Hatboy #2: Was turned into a crowbar by a wizard. (Was then lost in a big pile of crowbars that Hatman used to keep lying around.) Hatboy #23: Asked when Hatman planned on dying so he could become Hatman. Was arrested for “threatening the life of a beloved superhero.” Hatboy #46: Stung by a wasp and decided he was not cut out for the superhero life. Hatboy #73: The only female Hatboy to date. She left Hatman’s tutelage pretty quickly and struck out on her own. She goes by the name Helm Lady now and she’s actually doing quite well for herself. Hatboy #74: Eaten by a shark. Hatboy #79: Beaten to death with Hatboy #2. (Hatboy #2 was subsequently lost again. Nobody involved realized that he was the crowbar used to kill Hatboy #79.) Hatboy #86: The “forgotten Hatboy”, only showed up on one mission with Hatman and was never seen again. When asked by How To Hero about this Hatboy Hatman told us “there was never an 86th Hatboy”. Hatboy #100: The hundredth Hatboy! Can you believe some people actually thought this guy would be the one to take over Hatman’s legacy. Ha! Joke’s on them. He turned out to be a cyborg sent from the future to kill Hatman. Technically the closest any Hatboy has gotten to taking on Hatman’s mantle.  Hatboy #115: Sprained his ankle and was told by a doctor that he couldn’t fight crime for a few months. Hatman promptly returned him to the orphanage from whence he came (can you even do that?????) and had his memory erased. (What??????) Hatboy #166: Stung by bees, had an allergic reaction, taken to hospital, hospital ended up being a front for evil bees, every doctor was actually several evil bees in a lab coat, Hatboy stung several more times, has several more allergic reactions, quits. Hatboy #167: Hatboy #166′s twin. He got annoyed that Hatman kept calling him his brother’s name. Quit. Hatboy #173: Accidentally launched out of a cannon. Never seen again. Hatboy #180: Lost in enchanted woods. Hatboy #182: Actually a tiny supervillain. Hatboy #193: Trapped in Opera House of Doom. Hatboy #195 and Hatboy #196: The first and only time Hatman decided to employ two Hatboys at the same time. They killed each other after a dispute about which of them Hatman loved more. (A stupid argument, Hatman didn’t much care for either of them.) Hatboy #203: Turned into a crocodile. Is doing just fine now. Hatboy #209: Cloned and then fired for violating Hatman’s strict but fair “no clones” policy. Hatboy #213: 213... 2 13... 13 twice... that’s unlucky two times. Like hell was Hatman going to keep a guy like that around. Shortest time as Hatboy at three seconds. Hatboys #214-233: After 213 failed Hatboys the local orphanage banned Hatboy from adopting anymore orphans so the next 20 Hatboys were imaginary. Unfortunately, not even nonexistence was enough to protect these brave Hatboys from suffering horrifying and grisly fates. Hatboy #234: The first new real Hatboy in three years. In an effort to show the rest of the superhero and orphanage community that he could keep a Hatboy safe, this Hatboy was never allowed outside until he turned thirty. By this time he was too large for the Hatboy costume, so he was fired. Hatboy #235: Hatboy’s back bay-beeee and cooler than ever! This Hatboy had spiked green hair, cool sunglasses, a skate board, and pet monkey. Easily the coolest Hatboy ever. Shame about the thing with the immovable mass of dark thoughts though. Hatboy #266: Eaten by that same shark from before. Apparently it acquired a taste for Hatboys. It now goes by the name Sidekick Snapper and it is still at large, so if that doesn’t turn you off from being a sidekick I don’t know what to tell you. Hatboy #272: Accidentally run over by the Hatmobile. Hatboy #279: Part witch, melted when it rained. Hatboy #280: Part ice pop, melted in the sun. Hatboy #283: As part of an attempt at synergy between this blog and the superhero community, this Hatboy was actually our very own Curly! {It was not fun let me tell you. On day three he had me scrubbing out the(All right nobody wants to hear it let’s move on to the next one!) Hey!} Hatboy #294: Tried to push Hatman in front of a train to avenge his predecessors. It didn’t work obviously. If Hatman had a dime for every time he got pushed in front of a train he’d be three times as rich as he already is. He’s trained for this. He knows how to survive being pushed in front of a train. (We can’t give away all of his tricks, but it essentially boils down to “not letting the train hit you.”) Hatboy #300: The three hundredth Hatboy! A party was thrown in the Hat Cave and all of the still living Hatboys were in attendance. (All 32 of them!) At the party they cornered the new Hatboy and held an intervention during which they convinced Hatboy 300 to get the heck out of there and never return. Hatboy #315: Fell in love with an elf princess from a magical realm in New York’s sewer system. Hatboy #330: Ended up on the wrong side of a superhero civil war.  Hatboy #349: Stared directly at an eclipse, was temporarily blinded, and was then kidnapped by a giant bird. Hatboy #355: Tripped and fell onto a landmine. Hatboy #368: Brainwashed into becoming a terrifying assassin. Hatboy #379: Struck out on his own and became the superhero Dark Brood to reflect his new mature and humorless disposition. Hatboy #380: “Misplaced.” Hatboy #388: The current Hatboy, he’s doing quite well actually... for now.

If the horrible fates of these Hatboys aren’t enough to dissuade you from a career as a sidekick, what’s the matter with you!? The life of a sidekick is not as glamorous as it’s made out to be. You’re essentially an unpaid intern with a high mortality rate. You’re going to be getting coffee, picking up dry cleaning, preparing meals, waxing and buffing and repainting hat-shaped vehicles, fighting the gross and weird henchmen that your boss doesn’t want to deal with. It sucks! And for what? So you can get eaten by a shark or lost at the nightmare mall? It’s just not worth it.

Instead what you should do is band together with other superpowered children and pressure one of the older heroes into mentoring you as a group. It’s like forming a sidekick’s union. You’ll look out for each other in a way the adults won’t. You’ll make sure nobody is put into situations that are too dangerous for them to handle. You’ll grow as a group and forge unbreakable bonds, and when you all grow up, you’re going to be a generation of superheroes the likes of which the world has never seen!

Right now you’re in a great position. You have powers, and you know you want to do good with them. So take some time now, find others like you, receive proper training and when the time comes, you and your team will take the world by storm. Don’t rush into things. Don’t fall under the spell of a charismatic older hero that doesn’t care about anything but himself. Don’t rob yourself of the change to be truly great! (We regret to inform you that Hatboy #388 was just hurled at a lava giant in a failed attempt to slow it down.) 

#superhero #superheroes #comics #comedy #humor #funny #advice #sidekicks #child sidekicks #Hatman #Hatboy #The Sidekick Snapper #magical realms #supervillains #self-help

[introvertguide]

Sullivan’s Travels (1941); AFI #61

The current movie under review is one of my surprise favorites from the AFI list, Sullivan’s Travels (1941). It was written and directed by Preston Sturges, who was writer/director for five films on the AFI 100 Funniest Films. The story is an elaboration of how Sturges was feeling as a director during the Great Depression. The film did not do especially well as far as accolades, but it was well received by critics and audiences. The film is also one of the first for Veronica Lake when she was barely 18 years old. Let’s take care of some business before discussing further and go over the plot of the movie. Of course that means...

SPOILER ALERT!!! THIS IS A SURPRISINGLY GREAT MOVIE SO DON’T LET ME RUIN THE SURPRISE!!! WATCH THE FILM FIRST THEN COME BACK AND CHECK OUT THE REVIEW!!!

The film is set in Hollywood during the Great Depression, and John L. Sullivan (Joel McCrea) is a Hollywood director who has made a lot of money off of directing light comedies. He is worried that his movies are shallow in the face of all the tragedy in the country and he decides that he wants to make a serious film based on a novel about the downtrodden called O Brother, Where Art Thou? The studio heads want him to direct another lucrative comedy instead, but Sullivan refuses to budge and decides he needs to discover what it is like to be poor. His butler and valet help him dress up in an appropriate hobo outfit, then Sullivan sets out with a dime in his pocket. 

In one of the funniest progression of events in a film I have ever witnessed, Sullivan attempts to hitchhike out of Hollywood with his entire staff (secretary, cook, personal assistant, press manager) following right behind him in a giant bus. Sullivan does not like this arrangement, but it was the only way the studio would allow him to try this stunt. After a beautiful pan of a lonely hobo walking back to a beautiful bus which is an office on wheels, the movie decides that Sullivan needs to break away. This is accomplished in the form of a twelve year old driving a make shift car, so Sullivan jumps in and the two speed off with the office bus in pursuit. The wacky car chase ends at a restaurant and Sullivan tells his crew that he will meet up with them in Las Vegas. In the meantime, he goes into the diner to get some food.

Inside, he meets a young struggling actress (Veronica Lake) who is just about to give up and go home. She believes that Sullivan is a tramp and buys him a breakfast of ham and eggs. In return for her kindness, Sullivan retrieves his car from his estate and gives her a lift under the pretense that he borrowed it from a friend. He does not tell anyone that he is taking his own car, so his staff report it stolen and he and the girl are arrested. He is released into the care of his valet and the Girl goes with him. Because of the mansion and chauffeured car, it becomes apparent that Sullivan is not who he said he was. After seeing how wealthy he is, the Girl pushes him into his enormous swimming pool for deceiving her. However, when he insists on trying his hobo project again, she goes with him disguised as a boy.

Sullivan and the Girl do finally get some experience in suffering, but keep returning to Hollywood when things get too overwhelming. They both spend some time riding in a boxcar, eating at a soup kitchen, and sleeping in a homeless shelter (where another hobo steals his shoes into which the butler has sown a business card). His experiment is publicized by the studio as a huge success. The Girl wants to stay with Sullivan and presumably marry him, but this cannot be since he was already married on the advice of his business manager in an attempt for Sullivan to lower his taxes. It turns out, however, that Sullivan was tricked and his wife cost him double what he saved. Also, she is in love with his business manager.

For more promotion for his project, Sullivan decides to thank the homeless by handing out $5 bills. Everyone knows that carrying a wad of cash around desperate people is dumb, and one hobo ambushes Sullivan and steals the money. Sullivan is knocked unconscious and put in a boxcar leaving the city and the thief gets run over and killed by another train while trying to pick up the money he dropped while escaping. When the mangled body is found, it turns out that this was the hobo who stole Sullivan's shoes, and a special identification card sewn into them identifies him as Sullivan.

Meanwhile, the real Sullivan wakes up in another city with no memory of who he is or how he got there. A train boss finds him and berates Sullivan for illegally entering the rail yard. In his confused state, Sullivan hits the man with a rock and is sentenced to six years in a labor camp. He gradually regains his memory and tries to find a way to escape. In one of most progressive scenes of the time, an all black church allows the white convicts to join them for a showing of some cartoons to lighten everyone’s spirits. It is a showing of Walt Disney's 1934 Playful Pluto cartoon and Sullivan is surprised to find himself laughing along with the other inmates.

Unable to convince anybody that he is Sullivan or communicate with the outside world, he comes up with a solution: after seeing his unsolved "killing" on the front page of a newspaper, he confesses to being his own killer. When his picture makes the front page, the Girl recognizes him and Sullivan is released. His "widow" had already married his business manager, so he realizes she will have to give him a divorce or be charged with bigamy. Sullivan's boss tells him he can make O Brother, Where Art Thou?, but Sullivan says that he has changed his mind. He wants to make comedies, having learned that they can do more good for the poor. 

It seem pretty apparent that Preston Sturges wrote this as a “what if” scenario when considering his own work. He was a director that was known for his screwball comedies and he sometimes craved for a chance to try more serious films. This was one of his more serious films and it was still very funny and showed his maturity in sticking what he was best at and brought his audience the most joy. Sturges is known in Hollywood history as the first real writer/director and he established that reputation in style. He famously sold the story for one of his movies to Paramount for $1 on the condition that he would be allowed to direct the film. Quite the character.

As I have mentioned in all my articles on this movie, Veronica Lake was very young and very pregnant during the filming. She gave birth to her first child only a couple of months after wrapping up filming and had to hide her very pregnant body. She had a body double for some of the scenes, but she mostly hid her stomach in a variety of costumes. One thing I noticed, with the exception of a brief puff in the diner, she was not smoking nor was she around smoking in the film. It is also fun to look and see if you can “spot the belly” because it is definitely noticeable in some scenes.

A favorite scene of mine and one that was recognized by the NAACP was the church scene towards the end. Standard race roles were challenged on film as a church of black parishioners took pity on the apparently all white prison gang and allow the inmates to sit in front and join them in watching a movie. Black Americans were still being forced to sit in the back against their will and were often not given the same opportunities as White Americans. This scene reversed the standard racial stereotypes of the time and portrayed sympathetic and forgiving black church members giving permission to white criminals to join them. It was completely unheard of at the time and made for a great lesson for the character of Sullivan.

So, it is time for the standard questions. Does this film belong on the AFI list? Sure does. It is one of the first big roles of Veronica Lake, it is a master class of writing and directing by Preston Sturges, and the film is very enjoyable on all levels. Would I recommend it? Oh yeah. This movie is great. It is genuinely funny with great dialogue and represents a more subtle comedy that really stands out from the screwball counterparts of the time. I watched it three times over five days and I never checked the clock because it moves so well. I highly recommend it to see Veronica Lake at her finest and to enjoy fast moving dialogue that is ahead of its time. 

#sullivans travels #veronica lake #preston sturges #40s #hollywood #comedy #golden age #black and white #afi movies #film review #movies #introvert #introverts #best movies #top 100 movies

[coredrill]

alright, here are my thoughts on the unstoppable wasp novel! i’ve put the majority of my thoughts, and LOTS of spoilers, below the cut. short summary is that . . . i didn’t really like it at all :/

so, i’m gonna preface this by saying that i wanted to absolutely LOVE this book. it’s all about nadia and she is one of my all-time favorite characters and it’s so great that she got the spotlight in this way! i just really really wish i could, in good faith, say that the book was good, but i just can’t. and admittedly, i consider the unstoppable wasp comics to be nearly perfect, which is a high bar to hit, but there was just so much about this book that left a bad taste in my mouth.

first thing i want to mention is the role of the rest of the g.i.r.l.s. and when i say that, i mean that they had virtually no role. i genuinely wasn’t sure if i (the reader) was expected to have read the comics before the novel. on one hand, the first few chapters were spent pretty much summing up the comics, which is fine, especially because some readers may not have read the comics. on the other hand, if i hadn’t read the comics, there’s NO WAY i would’ve known anything about the other g.i.r.l.s!! they’re barely present in the plot of the book! they are present in one scene in the beginning, taina has a few lines throughout, and they’re more involved at the end, but a lot of the times they seemed more like wallpaper than actual characters. especially because of the frequency with which the author would throw in lines such as “that ethiopian place that shay likes” or “priya’s on-trend jeans” and just name-drop them without really giving them any substance. since i know the comics, i already know these characters--but if i was just reading the novel with no background? there’s no way i’d be able to keep them straight.

building off of what i said in that last point, i also wanted to mention that i listened to the women of marvel podcast interview with the author. something that i noticed is that she would always refer to the g.i.r.l.s as the “g.i.r.l. squad.” and that, i think, is the root of why i didn’t like how they were handled. it’s obviously pretty simple to explain their absence in the story by just noting that the whole point was that nadia was feeling alone and isolated from them. HOWEVER, in my opinion as a woman who has been in engineering . . . that doesn’t happen? nadia and the g.i.r.l.s are labmates--it’s right there in the title. they ARE the genius in action research labs. the “lab” isn’t just the location, it’s the people who make it up. by referring to them as “g.i.r.l. squad” instead of just “g.i.r.l.,” the author is changing the dynamics from “being a cohesive unit of girls who make up this incredible group and support each other in their science and goals” to “friend group who all happen to do science.” and as i mentioned, the random falling-out that happens in the book doesn’t happen to groups of the first type. being a girl in stem SUCKS. being in a stem class means that you’re automatically friends with the 1-2 other girls in there with you. and the people you work on projects with in a lab? the other girls who take the time to support you and have your back even though the odds are stacked against you? those are a whole different kind of friendships and i PROMISE they’re not wrecked by just forgetting to talk to each other. the girls that i worked with in college--the girls that i worked with now--it’s for survival. you don’t just fall apart like nadia apparently did from the g.i.r.l.s in this book.

okay. final bullet point on this topic. but in the women of marvel interview, the author said that she wanted to explore what could break apart the bonds that the g.i.r.l.s had formed. but on page 263, there’s the line “and if they had all just been a little better at communicating, maybe it wouldn’t have been so long before one of them realized that nadia was relying a little too closely on that little gold device.” so this deep dive into splitting the g.i.r.l.s apart, and barely giving shay, taina, ying, and priya a role in the story--was caused by MISCOMMUNICATION??? no freaking thanks LMAO. even without everything i’ve already mentioned, that trope is so lazy.

the writing style kinda bothered me at some points--i remember the discharge being described as “carbon dioxide” at one point, but like, just call it white foam. it’s so much easier and saying carbon dioxide pulled me out of what was happening. obviously this is a personal thing, not something objectively bad, but i still thought i’d mention it.

there seemed to be this point, around page 260, where it seems like the book flipped a switch. obviously, this is where the climax hit, but so many other things seemed to just randomly get pushed into place because the plot necessitated it? like, for example, nadia and the g.i.r.l.s are suddenly bffs again. even though, in nadia’s interior monologue, we’ve been hearing her resentment for them, it seemed like once the plot needed them to work together that they were able to do so without problem. and not only that, but it didn’t even feel earned? the book NEVER showed nadia and the g.i.r.l.s as actually like. being friends. (as i mentioned, not a choice i agree with, but still a fact.) so to have them all suddenly team up for the Big Boss Battle just felt weird and disengenuous to all of them. additionally, nadia went from defending margaret at all costs to suddenly thinking “oh yeah, she’s probably super evil. no big deal.” like WHAT??? the whole point of the first 250 pages was to show that nadia feels like margaret is the only person she can trust. all of a sudden she’s cool with her being evil??? make it make sense! you could see throughout the rest of the book that nadia was building up her Wrong Thoughts. sooooo much time was spent on it and we actually saw the development of how nadia felt. but to have her switch all that on a dime so that she can have her Right Thoughts now??? just in time for the Boss Battle? it just feels so unearned, since there’s nothing building to it. she just . . . changes her mind.

i also feel like writing a book where the protagonist, where the person whose perspective we’re following, is being MIND-CONTROLLED, but not revealing that mind control until the 11th hour (to validate the sudden switch from Wrong Thoughts to Right Thoughts) was just. a bit weird. i’m 22, but if i was reading this as a teenager, i’m not sure i would’ve quite gotten that the WHOLE BOOK was now being told by an unreliable narrator, with absolutely zero reliable information as a base (except the comics, of course).

ON PAGE 274. THERE IS ONE MENTION OF SHAY MAKING HER TELEPORTER PORTABLE. THIS IS AN INCREDIBLE FEAT OF SCIENCE AND SO GREAT FOR SHAY WHY WAS THIS NOT EXPANDED ON IN THE SLIGHTEST????

alright, time to talk about the nadia-being-ace thing. so, ever since i started reading unstoppable wasp, i’ve interpreted nadia as aroace. her version of friendships, her attempts to change the topic when romance for herself is brought up--these are all very authentically ace experiences. and that was okay for me to just have her coded that way! the writer of the comics, jeremy whitley, has included TWO (2!!!) ace characters in his raven pirate princess series so i definitely allowed myself to entertain the idea that the ace aspects of nadia were intentional. i was also okay with it not being explicitly mentioned in the comics--sure it would’ve been cool, but i understand that there are 18 issues TOTAL and it would be hard to fit the entirety of nadia’s story in there. BUT, when the author of this book mentioned that nadia was ace, and jeremy whitley confirmed that he’d been writing her as ace, it was awesome and super validating!! first of all, nadia being the first canonically ace marvel character--even just by word of god--is so freaking incredible and just adds to my enjoyment of the story. i’m very glad that we got confirmation and that i can continue reading the comics knowing, at the very least, that my ace reading of them is backed up by the canon (!!!!!). however, the author of this novel 100% used it as a marketing tactic which is super shitty. i was obviously going to read it anyway, since it was about nadia, but i do know people who bought it specifically because the author mentioned nadia being ace. and there was maybe one throwaway line in the novel about how nadia was only interested in romance ~theoretically.~ that’s not rep. in fact, it’s even less rep than the comics, which represented nadia being ace (at least in my opinion) far more authentically than this novel did. i’d honestly even go so far as to say it was riiiight up against the line of queerbaiting--yes nadia is canonically queer, but only by word of mouth, and it’s not mentioned even once in the story. that’s bad. using ace people for marketing--baiting them into buying your book on the promise of rep which we already have so little of--is so so shitty. yes, i am glad that we got that confirmation from jeremy whitley who never used this to promote the comics and didn’t even mention it until now, but i genuinely cannot believe that this author (who is bi! i checked her twitter!) effectively used it to market her awful book. honestly if the book weren’t bad enough already, to add this on top of it is even WORSE.

in the same vein, the author mentioned ying and shay being in a wlw relationship in the same interview where she mentioned nadia being ace. ying and shay are barely in the novel and EVEN WORSE, their relationship is kind of treated as an “obstacle” that nadia and the other g.i.r.l.s have to overcome in order to start working as a unit again. also bad!!!!!

okay. i think i’ve got this and one more bullet point, so we’ll see how it goes. but the way that the science in this book was handled was atrocious. sure, we had the cute science facts, but there is one (1) paragraph on page 311 about the g.i.r.l.s doing science for the sake of doing science and helping their community. IN THE WHOLE BOOK. you know a great way to demonstrate to women that they shouldn’t go into stem fields? write a cautionary book about the ~dangers of ai and data collection~ AS IF ANYONE LIVING IN THE WORLD RIGHT NOW DOESN’T KNOW THAT SHIT. jesus fucking christ. the comics showed all of this great science by the way of the g.i.r.l.s papers, shay making her teleporter at home, defusing the bomb in ying’s head, recreating the vision gloves, tai’s sports robots . . . this book had NONE of that. it literally just had the evils that we see in the news EVERY DAY. that’s not what you show people to get them excited, and i find it really fucking weird that ANYONE greenlit a book about characters who support and encourage women to go into stem fields with the overall message of “science bad!” like. how the fuck was this plot approved. in the women of marvel interview, the author claims that she’s written about women in science before--and i believe her. i just don’t think that she’s ever actually spoken to a woman in science.

and lastly, i have a huge issue with the role of hope in the book. by that, i mean that the novel is called “built on hope” but hope is literally never a theme throughout the book? so yet another instance of the book building off the comics without any form of payoff. the unstoppable wasp comics are kind, and loving, and hopeful. this book is callous and condescending and seems more concerned with its sassy one-liners about white dudes and ham-fisted pop culture references than LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE, including hope. nadia claims to love her friends but spends the majority of the book shitting on them. nadia lies to janet to “avoid hurting her” but the end of unstoppable wasp 10 showed the flip side of the situation where nadia and jan realize that although janet was hiding the truth about hank from nadia, nadia wanted to hear the information anyway!! and i just--WHY would you take a character who has been explicitly used in the past to introduce girls to women in stem (the interviews with real people in the back of the comics!) AND THEN WRITE HER INTO A FUCKING CAUTIONARY “TECHNOLOGY BAD” STORY??? it’s SO discordant with the comics and i genuinely hope that anyone reading this book goes and read the comics themselves, which are incredible and a bajillion times better than this book in all aspects. i’m finishing this “review” a lot more fired up then when i started typing it but i honestly can’t believe that marvel greenlit THIS and not like. 2 more comics.

so, yeah, those are my thoughts. kudos to anyone who actually made it through the whole thing (if anyone does), it’s egregiously long but i needed to put my thoughts somewhere! tldr: i will not be recommending this to my mom.

#ugh this took way longer to type than i expected LMAO #anyways #f: marvel #marvel: novels #n: built on hope #t.txt

[gclubll88-blog]

How to Compare Online Casinos

No matter if gambling on line is often a really serious pastime for you or even a casual hobby, choosing involving the a huge selection of on the internet casinos out there online today is usually rather intimidating. Just after all, each and every on line gamer has their own one of a kind personality, likes, dislikes and preferred games. Just as each player is distinct, so are on line casinos. Under would be the fundamentals to consider when buying about for an online casino that may meet your gambling requirements and then some.

It really is All In regards to the Games

In regards to on the internet casinos, I come to play and I play to win. But 1st and foremost, I come to play. That signifies that you are not going to stick around playing a game you don't delight in. Even when you play a game prevalent to all casinos like poker, when the interface is weak you are all but guaranteed to make a quickly "exit."

Since on-line casinos only function games where wagers are involved, you may think your possibilities are limited, but you couldn't be farther from the truth. Lots of businesses pride themselves on thinking outside the box and offering new and revolutionary games that raise the bar in terms of graphics, sound and playability. It is a very good idea to acquire an notion of which on the net casinos carry games that you're enthusiastic about playing. Businesses like Rival and Cryptologic are just two of the a lot of best on the internet casino software providers that push the envelope with just about every game they place out.

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Look for Peer Critiques

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Beware of Sign Up Bonuses

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Are you a Mac or possibly a Pc?

Even though every single on the web casino is Computer friendly, the same can't be said for Macintosh computer systems. On the other hand, on the net casino bosses are not blind and quite a few have developed platforms that happen to be compatible with each Computer and the increasing variety of Mac customers. So if you are on a Mac, your option is relatively limited. If you're on a Computer, the on the net casino world is your oyster.

ECOGRA Certified Casinos

You can find numerous third-party on the net casino watchdogs around, all of them monitoring the casinos to view that they are playing fair. Essentially the most trusted of them all is eCogra (short for eCommerce On the web Gaming Regulation and Assurance). There's no technique to make certain that any on line casino is certainly fair 100% with the time. Nevertheless, seeing that a casino is certified by eCogra will be the greatest way to know that play is as fair since it might be.

There are other names out there, but none as universally trusted as eCogra. While other folks might definitely do their job and if not much better than eCogra, their reputation is definitely strongest. In theory, any individual could start off a watchdog firm and produce a seal. By going with an eCogra certified casino, you know that they stake their reputation around the truth that your gaming encounter are going to be a fair a single.

Know the Law

Even though it should not be, on the net gambling is largely prohibited in lots of areas, the Usa integrated. In these locations exactly where it truly is legal, it's highly regulated. Thus, no matter whether on the net gambling is legal inside your location or not, it is actually crucial to know the law before you commence spending. A web based casino enabling you access does not necessarily mean that their solutions are legal exactly where you're. It is actually tough for governments to regulate the world wide web and often the player will be the one at danger. In case your funds are seized, the casino has their funds currently due to the fact it truly is legal for most casinos to accept deposits. So just before making a deposit, look into online gambling laws distinct to where you reside for a hassle-free gaming knowledge.

[mxcxgxm]

How to handle the pain of loving someone you can’t have

Whether the person you secretly love is your best friend’s fiancee, your boss’s crush, or your close friend who’s clearly in love with someone else, there’s no escaping the pain of being with them and knowing that you can never have them. Whenever they’re around, you get consumed by your efforts to conceal your emotions, hoping that the way you stare at them won’t give away your real feelings. There are times when you ask yourself why you’re subjecting yourself to this kind of torture. And the answer is quite simple: they bring you joy. 

Maybe you’ve decided that it’s better to be with someone you really love, even if you can never have them, than not have them in your life in any way. If that’s your decision, then there’s nothing much you can do, except handle the pain that goes with it.

There are only a few things more agonizing than being in love with someone you can’t have. How can you deal with this kind of pain? 

Be cool

If you are still hanging around because you hope that the two of you will be together one day, or you’re still enjoying the happiness the person brings, even with all the pain, here are the things you can do to cope.

#1 Enjoy your time together, but don’t ask for anything more. Condition your mind to only focus on the good times and forget the rest. Don’t demand anything more than what’s given to you, because it’s likely that they’ll say no. If you’re going out to grab some coffee, enjoy those moments. Who cares if they’re going to be with their partner afterward? Not you! Acknowledge the pain, but focus on the good times.

#2 Do not ask questions that could hurt you. Asking questions that run along the lines of “Did you ever love me?” and “Am I not good enough?” will just hurt you, or cause tension in your relationship. The goal is to avoid pain, so it’s counterproductive to seek answers to these questions.

#3 Divert your attention to hobbies. Spending too much time analyzing your feelings? Roll your sleeves up and get a new hobby—right now. Just get out of bed, go to a craft shop—or wherever else you can—and get your hands movin’. Not only will this temporarily help you ease the pain, it will also make you more creative—and creativity is always a good thing. Imagine how many paintings or hats you’d make by the end of the year, if you just use the time you spend on self-pity wisely?

#4 Be a real friend, but protect your feelings. Of course, you want to be their crying shoulder. But when it comes to unrequited love, and you’re on the losing end, don’t give your all. Make sure that you’re comforting them without crushing your heart. It’s okay to listen to them talk about their frustrations with the person they love, but it’s another thing if that’s all you talk about and you’re even helping them plot the perfect surprise party for their beloved.

#5 Be surrounded by friends. During times of emotional turmoil, you need the loving arms, sound advice, and truckloads of craziness of your best buds. There’s nothing like pondering and laughing about your situation over a couple of beers. I am sure they’ve all had similar experiences, and would be very much willing to share some tips. Say “cheers” and laugh it off, at least for one night!

#6 Stay away from hurtful situations. If you know that they’re going to be with their partner at a party, don’t show up. Why would you? It’s like committing suicide. Simply decline their invitation and be at peace. Sleeping all day or binge watching your favorite TV show are so much better than seeing the person you love with somebody else.

#7 Learn to compartmentalize. To cope with emotional turmoil, you have to learn how to compartmentalize. When you’re with the person you adore, be with them 100%. But make sure that when you’re working or doing something else, your mind is not wrapped around them. It takes a lot of practice, but it can be done.

#8 Devote 30 minutes every day to sulk. Set a specific time in your day to just be sentimental about your one-sided love affair. Don’t let thoughts about your beloved consume you all the time; when the thought pops in your head, tell yourself that you can only think about it from 6:00-6:30. It sounds like a crazy idea, but it’s effective!

Cool isn’t an option

Perhaps some time has passed, yet you’re still stuck in the same situation. You want things to change, or you’d rather be left alone. Here are some things you can do to eliminate and even totally get rid of the pain.

#9 Stop pretending you’re okay. If you’re really in pain, you don’t have to pretend you’re okay. Not anymore. You’ve been dealing with this for months *or years* and it is exhausting to put on a fake smile all the time.

Tell them you can’t be with them while they shop for their lover’s gift because it hurts you. Don’t laugh or smile if you really don’t feel like doing those things, either. You are entitled to express your real feelings, just like they’re entitled to theirs.

#10 Limit contact as much as possible. Yes, even if seeing them makes you “happy” on the surface. You must learn to turn away from something that only gives you temporary happiness and be okay with missing out, because here’s something you should know: if it causes you distress, you’re not missing anything! Do yourself a favor and protect your emotions.

#11 Date other people. Why not? Don’t be scared that you’ll lose the tiniest chance of having the person you can’t have. You’re the only one being sentimental about it. Trust me, they’ll even be genuinely happy for you. If they actually like you, but have been too afraid to make a move, this may give them a push to finally do so.

#12 Hide them from your feeds. You always want to see them and find out what they’re doing—that’s why you added them on Facebook. But then you also see them cuddling with their sweetheart. Ah, those photos can make you bleed! Once and for all, hide them from your timeline. They’re like an addiction. You have to cut them out of your life, by all means.

#13 Write about your feelings. Writing about our feelings can give us a clearer view of what we’re going through. This is a well-known therapy technique that won’t cost you a dime. This has the same effect as a prayer. What makes this better is that you can actually re-read what you’ve written, so you can assess yourself better. This serves as a great proof of just how crazy you are being!

#14 Write a letter to yourself. After writing about your feelings, it’s time to write a letter to yourself. Yes, it may sound cheesy, but it’s one effective way to regain your self-esteem and forgive yourself. It can help you reconnect with yourself, so you can face reality, and make new plans for your life.

#15 Finally, tell them what you feel without expecting anything. It will relieve you of all the self-inflicted tension you’ve built up over time. Simply inform them that you like them, but know you can’t have them. This will liberate you, as long as you ensure that you’re not doing this to get sympathy or love.

Be advised: if confessing your feelings would put you and your beloved in danger *i.e. if you’re in love with your future sister-in-law*, forget it. It’s not worth the trouble. Just deal with it on your own.

It’s painful to love someone you can’t have, but don’t let it take over your life. Sure, allow yourself to sulk for a time, but after that, dust off your sorrows and toughen up a little *or a lot*. When all is said and done, you’ll be glad you took care of your heart and sanity using these tips, even when in love, because those are the things that only you can protect.

[allenmendezsr]

Italian Ice Carts

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Italian Ice Carts

 Buy Now    

Want to earn Full Time Money while working Part Time Hours? Now you can with your very own Italian Ice Push Cart! Its easier to get started than you think!

First, lets rewind back to a few years ago when I was working as a tired and lonely construction worker earning only enough income to “get by”.

My job seemed meaningless and my life was at a dead end. After all, I was working in the hot sun 8 hours a day. I was very miserable, and I’ll be honest, most of that misery came from the fact that I was working all day just so that my boss could go on a paradise vacation every month.

Add on the fact that the construction business was going down the drain with the economy, and things really were not looking good for me. I was tired of waking up in the morning wondering if I would still have a job. So here’s the question:

Is your ability to earn income resting in the hands of someone else?

Well, mine was everyday. I felt like I was playing the lottery with my life and hoping I still had a job the next morning. Those paradise vacations my boss was taking… I wanted one. I needed one. In fact, I needed my very own paradise. NOT ANYMORE.

One sizzling hot afternoon, I felt like my body was drying up in the heat. I needed a refreshment. Something that could replenish my body and get me going again. On the way back from my lunch break, I stopped by a local Italian Ice Cart for a quick cool snack. While downing the icey, I spoke with the owner about his cart business and found out that he had made over $70,000 working only 8 months out of the year and on his own schedule. Disclaimer: These are not typical consumer results. Results may vary. You may earn more or less depending on several factors.

I was SHOCKED! As soon as I got home, I started researching about italian ice carts.

A push cart business like this can do a complete 360 to your life. It can literally transform your personal finances and give you a whole new lifestyle. In just a short time you can increase your income and finally begin to enjoy life. Plus, an Italian Ice Cart business is extremely fast and easy to get started with.

To really put the business in perspective, most days you can profit from $200 to $600, or more, and that is working only during lunch hours in the afternoon. Disclaimer: These are not typical consumer results. Results may vary. You may earn more or less depending on several factors.

Italian Ice Cart owners don’t work nearly as much as the average person, so this means their hourly pay is actually much higher than other professions that require a college degree or similar schooling. If you have a great location and you are more than willing to work then owning an Italian Ice Cart can pay off big time! You will make more cash the first day of selling Italian Ice than you will at your current job. Plus, its an all cash business.

Because of all this, I decided that owning my own Italian Ice Cart Business and being my own boss was exactly what I wanted in life. At that very moment, I told myself I would never depend on another boss to give me a pay check ever again.

Plus, the Italian Ice you’ll be selling is a very affordable product, which makes this a bullet proof and recession proof business. With the economy down, this is the perfect small snack to sell to the general public. Its delicious and just a few dollars!

Most Italian Ice Push Cart owners only work on the weekends, and many only work on specific days such as special events. With this business, its all about how much work you want to put into it.

I can hardly think of another job that will allow you to make your own hours, let alone your own entire schedule. But the Italian Ice business is one of them.

One very successful Italian Ice Stand I know serves their product in the middle of the night in busy downtown. Its very different, but tons of people enjoy it. There are millions of ways to make your Italian Ice Cart unique and different so that you stand out from other cart owners.

I started my cart business outside of a popular baseball field where rent was FREE! Yes, the rent was 100% Free! In fact, I’ll tell you in my book how you too can get sites rented for free! Oh, and I only worked the afternoon from 11am to 2pm.

Like lightning, word started spreading about my Italian Ice Cart and before I knew it, the stand become very popular. In fact, it become so popular that they asked us to move our cart farther down the field. The reason why? Our line of customers was creating a traffic jam at the entrance of the field! Within 6 months of starting, I built my own permanent Italian Ice Cart stand for less than $1400. I’ll show you how you can do it too.

I didn’t plan on building a permanent stand, it just kind of happened and then ballooned into something bigger. And this is just an option, you don’t have to be a permanent stand to be successful. You can own just one push cart and still earn fantastic income day after day, week after week.

With that said, there are pros and cons to both of the methods that I will explain in the book. The point is, your business will grow very fast before you know it!

Heck, it was only a matter of time until I began to get offers to buy my business. I loved selling Italian Ice and had no intention of selling the stand… Well, that is until the day I received an offer I could not refuse. I made more money than I ever imagined from selling the entire operating business.

To get to the point of making the amount of money I did, it took a lot of time and effort. By the time I sold the business, I knew as much as you possibly could about the business! I will share with you everything I know about it, exactly how I did it, and how you can do the same. This book will help you step by step with your Italian Ice Business so you can avoid the common mistakes that others make.

You Don’t Have To Learn The Hard Way!!!

By getting the book, you can skip the hassle of failing. I will tell you all the tricks, tips, and secrets that make the difference between success and failure… And these are secrets that you may never discover on your own!

How to start the business with as little money as possible.

How to comply with your state health department regulations.

How to keep your cart business legal and inline.

Where to shop for all of your ice and supplies.

How to advertise your cart business.

And much, much more.

Finally, you can be your own Boss!

Make your own hours and work when you want.

Work at Big Money Events – Parades, Games, Fairs and Special Events.

I will teach you everything you need to make your business a success.

You can work partime to supplement your normal income.

This is an all cash business where you can make $500 a day.

There is almost no overhead with this push cart business.

Each Italian Ice you serve costs you an average of only $0.25.

And the normal retail price you sell it for is $2.50!

I’ll share with you why its normal to sell Italian Ice 5 days a week!

When people start to see you make money with your Italian Ice Cart business they are going to want to help you out. And this reverts back to the fact that you are your own boss. You get to decide who works for you, around you, and who doesn’t. After all, you’re the BOSS.

The Italian Ice business will also help provide you with leads to bigger and better things. I had the opportunity to meet some great folks in the catering business and soon began to help them on the side. In this type of business you will meet people everyday that you can network with to expand your business and grow your revenue stream even more! The potential here is limitless!

Ok, so you may be thinking if its so easy then why do I need this book. Why? Because the Italian Ice Cart business is a very competitive business and there are a ton of mistakes you can make if you don’t know what your doing.

And in this business, one of the only ways you can get yourself in deep trouble is by making all those mistakes. Because remember, your largest competitor is going to be YOU!

I love the Italian Ice Carts business because it has allowed me to own and run and my very own business while enjoying it. I am able to meet amazing people day after day that enjoy me being there, and it gives me a great sense of pride in the fact that I started and grew it all from the ground up.

If you don’t already own your own business, then you need to start NOW. The feeling of not having a boss or not having someone stand over has to be one of the best feelings in the world. And you too can have that feeling.

I could never let my friends, or anyone for that matter, start an Italian Ice Cart business without having the information I provide in this book. At one point I owned 3 separate Italian Ice carts making a total of about $1500 per day… Yet, I didn’t have to pay a dime for anything! Its those secrets you need to know so you don’t get left out in the cold. I want you to be as successful as I was with my business.

I have a few lawyer friends who clear $100K per year, but I make even more than them! I am fortunate for my success and the fact that I am able to make up to a quarter of a million dollars per year selling Italian Ice. In my free time I finally can go on those paradise vacations, get invited to private parties, and I drive a brand new BMW M6. I live in a high rise condo on the 45th floor in downtown, and every single person I come across wonders how I can afford it. I am constantly asked the same question, “What is it that you do for a living to buy everything you have?”

And when I tell them I’m an Italian Ice Cart vendor, they don’t believe me. They see how young I am, the nice things I own, and they think I’m some kind of crazy drug dealer. BUT NOT ME!

The truth is simple. I own and operate several Italian Ice Carts that gross over 6 figures a year. Although, no one ever believes that is what I really do! But hey, I have gotten use to it over the past couple years, having wads of cash, and being able to do what I want and when I want. But after all is said and done your still probably wondering why I’m selling this book, right?

In general, I just don’t like to see people get ripped off by other sellers who think they have the true knowledge of running a successful Italian Ice Push Cart business, when they have never even served a cup in their life! And buying Italian Ice from the store or making it in your kitchen does not count!

In this book you will find all the information you will ever need to start you own Italian Ice business and to make a living just like I am able to do. To some of you, $300 per day may not seem like a lot of money, but this is a very expandable business. Plus, keep in mind that $300 per day is a lot of money if you only worked a few hours to earn it!

Even more so, there is more than just selling Italian Ice and making money. You can finally free your mind of stress, forget your money woes, and finally be able to enjoy life like it was meant to live. Living positively will help open up your mind to new ideas and help you find ways to expand your cart business. You will never be able to do that if you have someone breathing down your neck all day. Finally, be your own boss and get started right now!

” We are excited to say that we finally received our italian ice cart today and want you to know we are thankful for everything you taught us. We can’t wait to get started and to see the results that can be achieved from this easy to start cart business.“

—

Dan Knowling, FL

“Just a heads up! After reading your book I can say without doubt that you cannot put a price on that information. You should charge more for this type of valuable info. We are currently in the process of getting a location and are excited to launch our new business. I will keep you posted. Thank you again for your help!“

—

Bill Evans, NY

To express how positive I am that you will benefit from my book, I am offering a 60 day money back guarantee. My book as all the information you will ever need, it’s just a matter of finally getting off of your butt and doing it!

I look forward to knowing that there a ton of people who are going to take this information, put it to great use, and are going to go out there and make huge bucks!

But for others who are too lazy to get the book or think it doesn’t make for a great investment… well you are wrong and will be missing out. I hate to say congratulations to only the people who actually get the book, but those are the ones will will own their own successful business. And I look forward to hearing more from all of you new Italian Ice Cart owners!

But I am so positive you can benefit from my Italian Ice book that I offer the full money back guarantee. That is how confident I am that you can learn from my experience and use it to start your very own vending business. Get out there now!

All payments at ItalianIceCarts.com are processed over a safe and secure server. ***This is an E-book and can be viewed and printed directly from your computer*** After successful payment, you will be directed to a download page to INSTANTLY download the product.

It is easier than you think to get started in the Italian Ice Carts Business once you know how to do it. Use our book and be in business the very same day! After all, you do want to become your own boss and start making money right now? Well get up there and order the book so you can get started!

Finally, Be Your Own Boss! What Are You Waiting For?

ClickBank is the retailer of products on this site. CLICKBANK® is a registered trademark of Click Sales Inc., a Delaware corporation located at 1444 S. Entertainment Ave., Suite 410 Boise, ID 83709, USA and used by permission. ClickBank’s role as retailer does not constitute an endorsement, approval or review of these products or any claim, statement or opinion used in promotion of these products.

[manygalaxiesinone]

Crash Bash maybe?

((Greetings hee ho dood! Prinnyfrost reporting for duty! I think it’s time to get onto this discussion. With the success of the Crash and Spyro trilogies along with CTR remakes, should Crash Bash also get one as well? In my opinion...

Look to be honest, I am personally hopeful that it does get one, maybe not right away, perhaps in the future after some new actual games come out for both Spyro and Crash, but I would be interested to see one since honestly I did love the game and have plenty of nostalgia for it as well as the other Crash games.

And I became even more hopeful now that Rilla Roo’s playable in the new CTR and you can bet your ass I bought him the very moment I saw him available in the Pit Stop and I plan on getting Yaya soon even though I never played the game she was in.

Not to mention that games like this and Twin Sanity are the ones that I feel deserve to have remakes the most as while they were alright games, it’s clear that they could be far better if certain changes and more development time were made for them.

At the same time however, I can understand why people would be against this idea. As stated before it may be best to see some actual new games before continuing this remake trend that’s been going on. Not to mention that as a mixed bag game, it’s clear that there are plenty of those who genuinely didn’t like the game at all and probably wouldn’t bother getting the remake if it came out so it may not be for the best sales wise.

Shit I know if someone told me there’s going to be a remake for Shadow Dragon I wouldn’t spend a single dime on it and sell it to the nearest game store if anyone got it for me as a gift.

Regardless I do believe that just in case they do decide to remake the game someday, I should throw in some ideas of what could be done with it and if you have some ideas of your own (aside from the obvious “just not remake the game” comment I can see some people tossing in) feel free to share them.

First is the obvious and take care main complaint I hear when people talk about the game which is to make more mini games. While I do enjoy most of the games here

keyword being “most”. I have to admit that it could use some more variety in the games since most of them are pretty much the same mini game but with different obstacles and adjusted rules. I’m not saying that you should get rid of all the games, quite the opposite actually; 

however instead of labeling them as their own mini game, you could turn them into a different version of each game kind of like what smash bros does for it stages and let people adjust them with their own set of rules and whatnot. Not only would this help make things less repetitive, but it’ll also help separate it from other party games including Mario Party.

I have heard people mention including mini games from Crash Boom Bang into the mix, but I’m not so sure since I’ve never played it and I’ve heard rather poor things about the game. Maybe it would be best to have more unique mini games like seeing who can collect the most wumpa fruit within a time limit and have stages where you can steal each other’s wumpa fruit or instantly lose all wumpa fruit after being blown up by a nitro or zapped by Uka Uka. Or maybe a game to see who can last the longest while ridding on an animal while giving characters their own animals to ride on like Crash on Polar, Coco on Purra, or Cortex on a penguin with different stages featuring different types of obstacles to avoid but the pathway being different every time you play it.

That being said, this also means some changes should be done with the story mode of the game. I’m not sure what could be done about the story itself. I don’t mind it staying the same,

but at the same time looking at it now makes me think this is how the tournament started between Earthrealm and Outworld in one of the various Mortal Kombat timelines, especially since not only the original developers of Crash Bash were also the people that worked on Mortal Kombat 4/Gold, which is still my personal favorite MK games to date, but also Aku Aku sounds like he needs to consult with the Elder Gods throughout the whole thing to me. Just watch Crash Bash’s intro and tell me whether or not you can picture Raiden and Shao Kahn have the exact same conversation.

As for the stages, if we’re going so far as to make new games, then we could also replace some of the stages with said new games as once again, to make everything less repetitive. The bosses can remain the same, but some of the mini games should be switched out with whatever new games come into play since the games were mainly different versions of each game. This also means new challenges for the gems and relics, which are no doubt going to be incredibly bullshit like they always are in these games and perhaps actually getting something for reaching 100% instead of just unlocking more games. Maybe there could be new endings for going all the way good, evil, or neutral.

Next, I wouldn’t mind having a bigger roster than what’s available right now. The initial roster can stay the same, though I don’t mind replacing Tiny and Dingodile with Crunch and Tawna, but more characters should be included as unlockables while staying balanced for both good and evil sides. And by unlockables, I mean available to be unlocked at any point, even if we are going back to the whole wumpa coin thing. We shouldn’t have to wait a whole day to see what character we can get and see if it’s one we want or not and they shouldn’t be timed exclusives, which is a main issue I have about the CTR remake. I probably wouldn’t mind too much if it’s only done with cosmetics, especially those that are themed with holidays like Christmas and Halloweeen. That makes a little bit of sense to me since I don’t see many people using those cosmetics outside of the holidays, but the moment a character is included in the game, they should be available to unlock at any time.

And finally, while we’re on the subject of cosmetics, if the game does end up getting some, don’t just import every costume available in the CTR remake into this game. While I would like to see some costumes come back like Coco’s princess outfit or Crash’s motorbike outfit, I think there should be some room for new costumes for the characters like Tawna and Crunch as Jessica Rabbit and Mr. T (and yes I know Crunch’s Mr. T. outfit is already a thing, but it’s not available for the CTR remake at the time of this posting to my knowledge), or Brio as a pirate to go against Cortex’s ninja outfit. I just prefer it that the games have some outfits unique to them okay?))

#crash bash

[sugarwaterradio]

What happens when you sign a Music Contract? | Rules to this Sh!t

I love music. I hate the industry. It’s an entirely shitty situation. I’m all over the fucking radio. These motherfuckers love me. Why the fuck am I broke? You know D, that’s how you felt, like Goddamn. That’s the fee you pay to get into the game. Wow. So this piece of paper really holds this much power. They just spend these kids, man. People get fucked over all the time. Where do you learn it? There’s no school for hip hop. Well, Puff is like my idol. You know what I mean? He’s one of the reasons why I wanted to be a part of Bad Boy, why I wanted to be hit man. So Puff was like, "I wanna sign you to a publishing thing. I wanna do this, I wanna manage you," and I was like, "This is, like, Puff wants to do this for me?" And I’m thinking, I’m like, "Wait a minute ... If I sign all this stuff, that means he gets paid from everything I do. And even if I produce with him, it’s like he’s getting paid twice." And I was like, "Get the fuck outta here." I remember we were in the studio and I screamed at him, it was the first time I screamed at Puff. I was like, "How am I supposed to get any money?" And he was like, "Alright then." It wasn’t like there was no beef, but then it was like, alright so you about to go to this party afterwards. So at that moment, I realized is a difference between friends and business. He never stopped being my friend because I didn’t sign those papers, but like, shit, if you gonna let me do it, I’m a try. I never told him, I appreciate you for that because that was one of the best learning experiences I ever had in the music industry. We are about to sign our recording contract. Over here, we got all the Cristal we about to pop. They have fucking clauses in these shitty contracts that say, "We’re only gonna pay you 15%." In that 15%, the label’s charging you for every fucking thing that takes place. Yeah, you see we’re getting D Dots joint down there now. Proof. The artist has to pay everybody. The producers, the songwriters. Every dime they spend, they either gonna charge you half or 100%. So most of us, including myself, had no clue what the fuck that meant. All these motherfuckers with your shitty paperwork, your money’s gotta go through all them. Damn, we only getting 12 cents off a dollar? And outta my 12, I gotta pay you, you, you, you and you? What the fuck? Damn, can you at least put some Vaseline on it? Can we have some wine and cheese before? Goddamn, like, what’s happening here? You have a lot of kids coming from these inner cities that never even seen 10,000 dollars cash before. So if you have a person that’s coming to you like, "Here’s 20,000. Sign to me, I’m a put your album out." They’re not looking at no legal team where like, "Let me call my lawyer and make sure that this deal is right." You’re taking the 20,000, you’re going to sign the contract and you’re going to figure it out later on when the money is gone. It’s too much coming at them too fast. A lot of people just are so thirsty for a platform that they sell themselves short. You just see a big label, and you’re like, "They wouldn’t do me wrong." Where do you learn that? There’s no school for hip hop. You know, I definitely signed some bad contracts in my time. Some still pending. Now, I’ve got a piece of paper. It make you just think, like, "Wow. Do this piece of paper really hold this much power?" You dangled, like, this fucking career in my face and, like, yeah, I want to do it. Of course I’m not reading this shit, like, not to say that, like, it’s the smart thing to do, but you’re young. But, at the same time, you a grown man. You know how to read, too. You told not to read that contract. So I don’t get when people say, like, "Oh, don’t sign with such and such, you know, they be fuckin’ people." You know, hell, they aint fuck nobody. You had it, you could have read it. You chose not to read it. You look at the fact, that they put this two bit stats of a minor over here next to the contract. This is all you gonna ever get. You aint even look at the contract. We have a frustrated artist who wakes up one day and realizes that, "I’m all over the fucking radio. These mother fuckers love me. Why the fuck am I broke?" And then they explain to you, like, "This is why. Paragraph 64 clause B says you don’t get shit." When you’re a artist, you gotta make hot records. That’s what your job is to do. You’re not making hot records, we have to move on. It’s nothing personal. It’s business. Even as a executive, if I’m not putting out hit records or I’m not signing hot artists, they’re gonna be like, "I think we can find somebody else to fill your position." Everybody at the label could get fired just like the artist could get dropped. You could go to war with your label and the label war is probably, like, one of the major contributions to failed careers. At the end of the day, I’m trying to take care of my family, too, just like you are, so what makes your life better than mine? You start arguing with these executives, and they just fucking turn the switch off on your ass. Don’t like you anymore. First thing you gonna say is, "Well, let me go." They don’t do that shit. Obviously, all the cash money we single doin this. Tyga claims that Birdman owes him like 12 million dollars. You know, hey, Birdman, you robbed me, so I’m going to put on a loud speakerphone and tell everybody that you robbed me and everybody else that comes to you is going to be very careful about how you, you know, they do those contacts. If anybody can take that stuff personal and have stuff goin, they might not want to choose this job. Literally everything in the industry, they will try to get over on you if you let it slide. I’m the type, like, I will pull up the complex, you know what I’m saying? Like, "Hey, where’s the footage?" You know, to be a boss, sometimes, you have to be a bitch. You don’t work a nine to five, so you don’t get, like, you know, your insurance and your income tax check. You don’t get none of that shit. Published shit is kind of like your paycheck for writing. You get paid for when people listen to your music over and over again. Those are checks that just come. You don’t want to give that shit up. Sometimes, you might have to, like, break a little piece off of somebody, you know what I’m saying? But make it worth it. Don’t give it all up. Ever. Ever. Yo, Kanye, you gonna play something? Yo, West! Kanye! Talk about Kanye and the publishing. To manage him, I had an opportunity to own some of his publishing. I didn’t want to do that to any producer I manage because they were my startup guys and Kanye was a sample producer. He took a sample from Jay-Z. Sample from this music, and then you put it together. I was gonna pretty much let him know that you’re not gonna make no fuckin’ money in royalties with all these samples you’re doing. I rearranged the deal for everybody to where he got his publishing back. The industry just wants to rape and take. Labels should do what’s fair, and that’s why the artists today are saying, "Fuck you, record company." And they should. Everybody’s trying to figure out how to get that money even though the sales have dwindled. There was one time I met these execs, like, brought us to the house, laid, everything is crazy and gave us this whole big pep talk, speech. And then, literally, like, I think it was eight months later we went and met the same guys, but this time in the office, and they came in and gave us the whole same exact spiel. Like the same exact speech, like the introduction, everything. And that’s when I knew, like, "Man." Like they just spin these kids, man. I’m 19. He’s 21, like, we’re young, so a lot of people try to take advantage of us. Yeah. But the thing is, they don’t realize that we actually already know what’s up. We already know. I’m so scared to sign my name on shit. I’m scared to give you a autograph, let alone sign a contract. It’s kind of like old school verses new school. Most kids now feel I don’t need to sign with a label. They have all this amazing music and I’m like, "I know some people, you wanna ... ?" And it’s like, "No. I just want to put it out myself." When we were coming up, we didn’t foresee MP3’s, but somebody did because in contracts we were signing, they would say things like, "You making records for cassette cd’s and any form in the future." That line meant a lot. All of a sudden, Itunes showed up and now, we’re fighting our contracts because we didn’t take time to study what was in it. Somebody else did. Make sure, before signing anything, to have somebody look over it just to make sure you just don’t sign your life away. A lot of artists, from day one, they walk into a shitty situation. Shitty paperwork, shitty deal, shitty people around them sometimes. In my case, we had the shitty paperwork. We went beyond that and we sold a lot of fucking records. You seen MC Hammer lose, what, 20, 30 million dollars? Like, it can happen. We didn’t know nothing about anything. I’m doing this shit. That was my first hundred thousand dollar check. At that point, we just started ballin. And that’s what you do it for. They givin’ us money to do this and we get to go shopping. I’m like, "Oh, shit. This is real. And I’m broke." You check your account, it’s like, "Where did that go?" Shit woke you up fast. Really, really fast. The day we got our first check, we ran out of gas, dog. That was, oh my God, that’s hilarious! Yeah. We got our first pay, so we ran out of gas on the freeway. We got our first- And we had to walk all the way to the gas, it was like, how many miles? A lot of miles, but, we had to walk. It was hilarious and we were so happy. Yeah. I was driving, too. I was so happy, I went, I didn’t even look at the gas. I didn’t even look at the gas meter on the freeway. I’m like, "Hold on. What’s wrong with the car?" Yeah. Yeah. Looked at the gas, I’m like, "Ohhh." Ohhh. It was 400, but it was 440 because maybe he gave us like a tip, too. First pay stub ever was $440. Yeah. . Read the full article

#BET #BETMusic #BETNetworks #BETRulesToThisShit #BlackEntertainmentTelevision #RulesToThisShit