#but i guess when these people talk about autism they don't mean actual autism | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

swordsonnet · 15 days

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i'm sorry but i don't think we should call this the "autism website" when there's still posts with tons of notes mocking people who:

struggle with social skills / have anxiety around social settings

are unemployed / unable to work certain jobs

have intense or "age-inappropriate" interests

haven't had certain life experiences that are deemed universal/essential

struggle with personal hygiene

don't have any friends or dating experience

don't go outside much or at all

take things literally / don't get sarcasm/jokes

have unusual ways of speaking

generally aren't "normal"

#+ other things i'm probably forgetting rn #i know most of these apply to other disabilities too but i wanted to focus on autism bc of all the 'autism website' stuff #it's genuinely disturbing to see someone go 'lol autism website'#and then in the next breath be like 'omg look at this loser who [literal symptom of autism]'#but i guess when these people talk about autism they don't mean actual autism #but the tiktok style 'just a bit quirky but still able to assimilate into abled hegemony with ease' autism #i'm just tired of the hypocrisy #autism acceptance month is over now it's time for autism wrath month #being disabled on tumblr can be fucking awful sometimes. might take a break for a while bc i just don't have the energy to deal with it #autism #actually autistic #actuallyautistic

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nothing-ramblings · 2 months

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i DO think laios is "autism creature" autistic. I think he's actually a great example of that. Most of the time i see the autism creature associated with special interests and hyperfixations and there's no way you could argue that's not a trait he has, it's a major plotnpoint that drives the story forward along with his other motivation. Something I also see a lot is the austism creature being used as an example of cluelessness, because of its expression. How are you gonna point to his social awkwardness, the fact that he's literally completely clueless about making people uncomfortable unless it's explicitly stated to him, and say he doesn't fit that description. I'n not sure what "tumblr" autism is supposed to mean, the person was probably talking about the more palatable traits people discuss more openly, but do you really think people aren't socially awkward in this webbed site?

i saw a rlly good post reacting to someone else's rotten take, unfortunately at the time i was too tired to read the full post and i ended up losing it, so i don't remember what all it said but basically the rotten take was calling laios creepy (in a "funny haha way" to disguise it) due to his traits, and op of the post i saw was explaining how that's fucked up. I think from what I skimmed it was very personal, comparing their own experiences to laios and honestly that might be my favorite thing about him. He doesn't just have the "palatable" traits that people are comfortable seeing. He is clueless, he had no idea someone disliked him, he even thought they were close friends, because that person never let him know when he was crossing a boundary until it was too much. Soon after this almost the opposite happens, where he doesn't believe someone else wants to be his friend, because now he's aware that he can't pick up on social cues, and he also knows he caused this person discomfort before, so why would they want to be his friend? He's "messy" in that he has a lot of traits people like to avoid when talking about autism, because it's stuff neurotypicals don't like.

He's literally that kid who people would be like "oh well if i knew he was autistic i wouldn't have treated him badly" (which is stupid, you should treat people well in general and not be an asshole then apologize because someone is actually neurodivergent or mentally ill). And guess what? He has friends who love him. They know he's awkward and clueless and has "weird" interests and they still love him. He has people who will stand up for him even after coming to the conclusion that he's "a little creepy" because they know he's a good person, and they like his honesty. Someone explicitly admits they envy his ability to be so openly himself, even after that same person tried to frame that trait as a bad thing, because they realized what they hated wasn't laios honesty but the fact that laios is able to act that way, while most people feel trapped by social rules and don't have that same freedom to be themselves. Laios can be himself not because society accepts him, in fact the first assumption when the elves learn he likes monsters is that he must be prone to evil. Because that's weird and creepy. Society does not accept him. His friends do. His sister does, she loves him and looks up to him as an adult as much as she did as a child. He has a support system. He is loved. Even people who don't necssarily love him know he could never become evil, even if they also think his special interest is a bit creepy. Because they know laios, actually know him, and they know that in his awkwardness he's still a kind person. He misses a lot of social cues, sometimes he says things that are tone deaf without realizing at all, and his friends know he means no harm. He just struggles with these things.

I think laios is a very good example of how nobody is unlovable, regardless of how awkward or clueless you might be, even if your special interest is something perceived as creepy. To me Laios is a reminder for anyone who needs to hear it that you are deserving of love too. Maybe you just beed to find a better support system, and that might take a while, but there's people who will love you the way you are, and accept you the way you are

#dungeon meshi #laios #blank rambles

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gold-snek-hoe · 3 months

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Hello and welcome to Opinions from an Internet Nobody. Today's essay:

"Ger therapy" is the new "You need Jesus": One Weirdo's Navigation through Cultural Shame

This is a supposedly well-meaning sentiment that is often weaponized against people who are behaving outside of perceived cultural norms. It's a favorite of homophobes who see queerness/transness as a mental illness, but I've been seeing it used to demonize kink (which historically is often linked to queerness), and more generally any "weird" behavior that makes people uncomfortable.

For example, otherkin, systems (especially those with fictives), and people who take fictional characters as partners. Y'know, "weirdos" who "can't separate reality from fiction." And, sure, sometimes there can be a problem with that distinction, but I know as well as you that most internet strangers saying "get therapy" don't actually give a shit about the mental health of those they target. It's code for "your behavior makes me uncomfortable, stop it."

Same sentiment as "you need Jesus."

This has actually taken me a long time to figure out. I've been in therapy for my entire adult life, working through various traumas, severe depression, anxiety, all that. Those were the biggest problems as they negatively impacted, and often endangered, my life. It was only after my hospitalization in 2020, where I was finally put on much needed medication, that I could start to grow into myself.

I changed my name. I top surgery. I came out as polyamorous. I finally got my official autism diagnosis. Now I'm fuckin' married! But... there are still things I'm working through in therapy. Mainly, shame over my "weirder" behaviors. My current therapist has been a huge blessing in helping me accept the things I was too ashamed to admit.

Now, I feel comfortable enough to share.

I'm otherkin. Always have been. My connection to my humanity is tenuous, and I'm sure that's connected to my autism. When mad, I feel phantom horns sprouting from my forehead. I have a tail that swishes back and forth at the base of my spine. In my soul, I am monstrous, and years of therapy has not erased that.

I feel like I'm only half in the physical world most of the time. This doesn't hinder my real-world success (I graduated college Summa Cum Laude, have an IMDB page, and am on my third book), but informs the way I look at the world. There's a whole other universe in my head that hums along with me in my day-to-day. That's part of why I'm so skilled as a writer. To ask me to divorce from that is to tell me to stop existing. Sorry, it's how I've always operated.

Lastly, and this is the one I'm really anxious about, I have a fictional husband. Now, looking at my blog, you might say "yeah, no shit," but I don't just ship myself with him. I mean I practice pop-culture Witchcraft, and the Goblin King is my patron. I mean I have a Labyrinth-themed tarot deck that I talk to him with. I mean I held a ritual to spiritually marry him. Basically, I Snape-wived myself.

And guess what? My therapist isn't concerned. It's not hurting my ability to live my life. I have other interests, hobbies, and goals outside of him, which he actively encourages in all our tarot sessions! I wouldn't be doing this if he didn't support me. My IRL spouse is usually there for whatever magical shit I'm doing, and supports me! Some of my closest friends know, and the only complaint I've gotten is "this guy seems important to you, I wish you told me sooner." Hell, my MOTHER knows and supports me, which is huge, because our relationship was pretty damaged after I came out as trans.

If you have a problem with the way I live my life, when literally nobody else does, take a good long look at why. You don't give a fuck about my mental health. You just don't like that I'm weird.

Tl;dr: My mental health is better than it's ever been since embracing the weird, so leave me and my imaginary husband Marak Sixfinger alone.

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autistichalsin · 2 months

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Don't know if this helps but I think a lot of people (esp neurotypical ppl) see multi paragraph responses as hostile or confrontational, bc length = very strong feelings. Ppl (subconsciously) emotionally view them as ranting. I blame the fact most ppl communicate online through social media that favors short, punchy/glib comments. Even multi tweet threads are a bunch of short comments in a row; nobody talks on forums where conversations span weeks anymore. I think that's why I don't see long essay response chains on Tumblr as often as I did pre 2018.

Oh, also, ppl not understanding a lot of non-neurotypical folk's communication where you prefer to make absolutely sure you're both getting across the point you want to make and saying everything you want to say. And since the only way to do that is use words (which are such terribly misunderstood things) you use as many as you need to. And then ppl see multiple paragraphs and instantly get defensive.

I still don't think that means you need to change the way you communicate though. Someone can always ask you to clarify your intent after all. Just thought maybe I could offer insight on that one part you questioned. My best friend is autistic and we actually had to have a long conversation about communication bc I was misinterpreting her verbosity for irritation, so it's something I had to think a lot about. Anyway! The tone indicators can probably help, hopefully.

(Tone: appreciative/thoughtful)

That's a good point too, because it has become less popular (and suspiciously right at the same time TikTok became the preferred socmed site). I remember when multi paragraph responses were just kind of the standard. Like I'm a Fandom Old, I've been around since Livejournal and I was one of the first 10,000 users on AO3 (on my first account).... this is all new etiquette.

TOTALLY agree about the autism thing like. Using a lot of words makes it less likely I'll be misunderstood... until now I guess lol.

I appreciate you very much, thank you for this ask! I won't change how I communicate PER SE, though I am probably not going to be posting disagreeing posts to anyone but moots again for a while because uh... there are definitely people reading my stuff in bad faith who will be waiting for their next chance to twist my words lol

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letters-to-lgbt-kids · 2 years

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My dear lgbt+ kids,

Many years ago I watched a documentary about interabled couples (meaning that one partner is disabled, the other one isn't).

They interviewed multiple couples and asked how they met, what their friends and family think of the relationship, things like that. I don't remember most of it (I can't even tell you if it was an actual movie-length documentary or just a short piece in the local news) but there was one story that always stuck with me:

An autistic man had a crush on a woman he regularly saw at his doctor's office. So he decided to write her a letter. He wrote down a detailed description (if I recall correctly it was multiple pages long) of how their relationship could look like: date ideas that would be safe and enjoyable for him, situations in which he may require her support or help, possible communication struggles they may face and ideas on how to deal with them etc. The next time he saw her at the doctor's office, he handed her the letter. She read it, smiled and said "This says you can't go dancing with me because loud music overwhelms you. But I really love dancing. Could we dance at home if you are in control of the music volume?". He said "Yes" and she said "Okay, then let's do that"... and they have been a happy couple ever since.

I love that story. Honestly, I wish someone would come up to me and hand me a letter like that!

There are so many unspoken rules in the dating world that (neurotypical) people oftentimes just expect you to know and understand - especially the whole "be mysterious, play hard to get, don't scare people off by being too honest" stuff can be really confusing! His letter feels like an antidote to that. He clearly communicated his individual set of "rules" (boundaries, needs, wants). It may be my autism speaking, but this sounds like the ideal way to start a relationship for me: they were both on the same page from the get-go rather than having to guess what the other one wants.

As someone who has been rejected for being too honest and talking about boundaries too early, it feels comforting to me to know that someone did exactly that and was so successful with it.

I mentioned this old story to a friend a few days ago - and they didn't think it was cute. In fact, they were shocked and disgusted by it. That sounds incredibly toxic, they said. You can't just hand your partner a set of rules at the beginning of the relationship and demand they stick to them forever. Those things need to be an ongoing conversation that both partners get to contribute to. Love isn't a business contract that one person writes and the other just signs off on. Treating it like one is a red flag. And quite frankly, they'd feel super creeped out if a quasi-stranger wrote multiple pages about a relationship they didn't even agree to yet!

And you know what? I absolutely believe that my friend is right - and I also believe that I am right. It could be cute and it could be a red flag.

This goes for all kinds of relationships but it's especially important for those of us who have unique or less common "rules"/needs (which could be because you are neurodivergent, disabled or chronically ill but also be lgbt+-related, e.g because you are ace or aro): Doing things differently is not by default toxic - and not by default wholesome, either.

That letter could be a great starting point for healthy ongoing communication in a relationship... and it could also be toxic if it is used as a binding contract that doesn't allow any further conversation.

Apart from a few obvious exceptions, we can't really make a definite list of things that are always good or always toxic when it comes to dating/relationships - we need to think of things in context. And that goes for the "standard route" as well as for more unique approaches.

With all my love,

Your Tumblr Dad

(P.S: For the record, I'm sure that the couple in the documentary does have ongoing, healthy communication!)

#I think it's unlikely that any of you know the documentary since it was so long ago - but if it seems familiar I'd love to know the title!#lgbt #lgbt+

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siooin · 5 months

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My review on episode 5 + some comparisons with manga and ln1.

It's mainly about Souheki because if i don't talk about them every chance i get i will explode.

Start of the episode ,i love the idea of using the sound the Ramune bottle and marble to attract Atsushi's n audiences' attention.It's a shame that they didn't animate Kunikida's soft smile when Ranpo was being even more rude in the manga.

annnnnnd ofc he's gonna focus on the marble and leave Atsushi sitting there awkwardly. Ranpo autism moment.

Atsushi thought Ranpo can't do anything without an ability is funny.Atsushi sweetie that's some wild assumption for a guy you just met a few days ago.He really just saw Ranpo can't take the train and assumed the worst lol.

this scene is always interesting to me because this is the only time we saw Ranpo paying respect to the dead like this.Now i have a few guesses of the reason.

1.a simple one is that maybe he did this all the time,after all we only saw him solve crimes with real bodies like two times.in perfect crime arc they were on rush.

2.Ranpo actually said "oh it's a lady",so yeah maybe he only did that to certain people

3.it's the start of the series so eveything is still uncertain

I don't have anything to add here,i think we could all agree dazai being there wasn't a coincident.

Another thing i mourn not making into Anime is that Ranpo saying even Dazai is an enigma to him in manga.it adds more layer in their relationship.tbh it's a bit boring if Ranpo always knows what Dazai is up to.

Now it's cute seeing Dazai defending Ranpo like that because i dont think minoura would actually hit him or something,maybe Dazai just wants to stop the bickering.

I love Ranpo's motto "All's well that's well for me" because it just like him.It seem self-center at first, but if you know him a little better, you'll know it actually means as long as he's fine he can make sure everyone else is fine.It's not just the meaning,this is how everyone's impression of him at first vs when they get to know him.

this part annoyed me the most cause Dazai looks so fond in the manga ,but he looks passive and serious in anime.LIKE WTF WAS THAT???DAZAI NEVER LOOKED AT RANPO LIKE THAT>>this leads to my biggest complaint of this episode⬇

//spoil for light novel 1

it has been talked many times how messed up the azure messenger arc aka light novel 1 adaption is.But I want to add it was so poor that it has already affects this episode.In the manga, Dazai didn't explain how he knows Ranpo didn't have an ability to Atsushi.The explanation here is actually straight up pull up from ln1 what he told Kunikida after he first met Ranpo.BUT because Bones don't wanna properly adapt the novel, they have to stiffly add it here.So that's why Dazai seemed serious when testing Ranpo,they want to add the impression this is the first time he discover it.

Do you want to know another fucked up thing about this scene is?They phased it like Dazai never work with Ranpo , that they're unfamiliar with each other.But in reality, Dazai has saw Ranpo's "ability"the very first time they met.They have worked together so well that they received their own name "Souheki".Dazai admires Ranpo so much that he constantly compliment him.

End the post of my favorite shot of this episode<3 Look at my son having the best time in his life🤩🤩🤩good for him good for him.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #ranpo edogawa #dazai osamu #atsushi nakajima #souheki #bsdrewatch2023 #actually have a lot more to talk about but im busy now.......#i still stands by my theory of ranpo seeing Atsushi as a stray cat Dazai randomly bringing in #he didn't even try to start anyconversations with him #actually i want to put them under microscope to see how their relationship develops #will forever be pissed that they removed Souheki's first meeting #anyways shameless promote i actually made a mini analysis about it check my pin if you're interested

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homestuckconfession · 18 days

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Why are you posting asks that are pro proship when one of your first rules is literally that you won't answer asks that are about Incest or pedophilia like???

People are discussing the actual content of Homestuck and its spinoffs and have a right to discuss all sides of it, including fandom reactions and discourse associated with it. What I don't intend to publish is people going "ong stridercest so hotzzzzzz" or "I love those creepy nsfw babysitting hiveswap fanfics so much". Commenting on fandom in general or offering opinions on reactions to stuff in fandom is not that.

Further, an admission to being "proship" is not the same as an admission to liking such things, as you may be surprised to learn that proship is about every relationship that is or has been demonized by the self-described "antiship" community on the same level (that being where the name came from), including things that are not implicitly abusive, such as "lesbian x man" (my personal introduction to the discourse--how many lesbians dated men before they found out they were gay?), "disabled character x abled character" (especially if the disability happens to be autism, I wish I was joking), and "what if they worked out their issues and lived happily ever after instead of being in a toxic relationship". I've even seen people say that interracial ships are inherently bad because fetishism or systemic racism creating a power imbalance or whatever. Not to mention the whole can of worms that's "terf antiship" which, as you might guess, works with the assumption that trans women are rapists and blasts ships accordingly. Anyone remember that anon who went around claiming Jade raped Rose on the basis that she had a penis?

Not to mention, as evidenced by all the messages I've gotten that are upset that HSBC might address incestuous abuse, the antiship discourse has warped how fandom analyzes media to the point that just talking about any kind of abuse, even in a negative light, is seen as being just as bad as glorifying it. I would say nobody in this discourse would survive watching Utena, but I learned recently that there's actually people who watched the show and, in response, spouted that it's evil proship BS because it portrayed pedophilia and incest in the process of sending a message that pedophilia and incest are bad. When you've seen stuff like that, it's hard to support the antiship cause, which often means you'll be considered proship by their standards. There's no in-between label for "sane about fiction", so you'd be lumped in with proship just for not aligning with antiship even if you're disgusted by glorification and fetishization of abuse.

Having once been wrapped up deep in shipping discourse myself, where I witnessed all of this first hand, I have a hard time making the assumption that everyone who says they're proship is those specific people who are out there beating themselves silly to incest and pedophilia. I mean, something like 80% of self-identified proshippers are kids barely old enough to use the internet, for crying out loud.

tl;dr: The topic is relevant because Homestuck made it relevant. Also, shipping discourse is a lot more nuanced than "people who have a fetish for pedophilia and incest vs people who think that's bad".

#not a confession #mod commentary #homestuck

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radio-cryptid · 2 months

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I am once again being autistic. It's autism acceptance month, which means you have to listen to me (that is a joke).

I'm thinking about Franziska von Karma as autistic. Her being so blunt and mean and I just love her.

Thinking about Maya Fey being so unapologetically autistic in the opposite way.

Welcome to some of my FranMaya autism heacanons.

PLEASE NOTE that I am autistic. None of this is supposed to be babying or degrading. Most of this is based on my own (or friends) experiences as an autistic person

Headcanons under the cut

|| Headcanons ||

Franziska stims using her whip (no shit)

Maya fidgets with her magatama (again no shit)

Franziska has problems with textures in food. She is very blunt about it, but in the way of "I can’t eat this." and a lot of people think she's just being snobby.

Adding onto previous, she doesn't like touching food with her hands.

One of Maya’s comfort foods are hamburgers.

This leads to her and Franziska sitting eating hamburgers in very different ways. Franziska got a fork and knife, while Maya just uses her hands.

Manfred Von Karma was not aware of autism beyond it’s stereotypes before Franziska got diagnosed. He puts in a lot of research into it later.

Side note, but I feel like either Franziska, mvk, or miles have sued autism speaks or at least prosecuted a case against them.

She doesn't have meltdowns as often as she should.

She deems them selfish, attention seeking, and childish. She doesn’t let herself have them. However, when she does have them, they're quite bad.

Both Maya and Franziska have too many layers on them at most times, and when overwhelmed, that is a living hell.

Franziska loves talking about the differences between japanifornia and Germany's legal systems (her special interest is law. I mean, she became a prosecutor at 13.) And Maya loves to listen.

She loves having debates with people but doesn't realise when they turn into actual arguments.

She and Maya are really good at finding that line between fun argument and real fight.

She doesn't understand why people find her scary. When they’re not going against her in court, they shouldn't have anything to fear in her mind.

She is very upfront about being autistic when she feels its needed. She doesn't go around informing strangers, but if someone asks her why she acts a certain way she may just straight up say "I'm autistic."

In the same vain, Maya makes jokes about her own autism a lot.

Maya vocal stims a lot, she makes random noises and quotes shows. Franziska tends to repeat these notices back to her.

Maya randomly: woop woop!

Franziska without hesitation: woop woop!

Maya infodumps about the Steel Samurai lore, and Franziska ends up taking notes. She doesn’t like the show, but she likes to hear about it from Maya. Sometimes a new episode of the pink princess drops or a leak for new merch and Maya will be like "FRANZY YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT HAPPENED" and Franziska will listen intently.

Maya gets overwhelmed at fancy dinners, there's so many unfamiliar social rules and etiquette she has to learn.

It's too much but she doesn't want to ruin anything for Franziska who invited her. Franziska notices this and immediately goes "We will leave now." With no further explanation. Maya’s later like "hey uuhh, why did we leave?" And Franziska equally confused is just like "You were uncomfortable and overwhelmed. Where you not? I don't want you to be uncomfortable, " and she says it like it's the most obvious thing in the world, and maya just melts.

Maya is the overly expressive type of autistic and Franziska is the blank face type of autistic. They compliment each other.

Maya uses Franziska as a weighted blanket.

Both of them get easily attached to inanimate objects.

Maya once gave Franziska the advice of using that kind of attachment to trick her own brain.

"Like, I once managed to get through a day of spirit training because I promised my necklace we would do it"

Franziska now promises her whip things it'll get to see and/or accompany her for, as a way of beating procrastination

I just love two autistic people helping each other and understanding each other.

Bonus!

Franziska will sometimes look to Phoenix when doing something that people react weirdly to. Idk why, but I love the idea of them being friends in a very specific way. She'll say something and then look over to Wright being like "too direct?" And he'll do that little unsure back and forth with his hand.

Maya also relies a lot on Nick for some social rules. Like when Edgeworth was behind bars and telling them to laugh at him and she earnestly goes, "Should we be laughing???"

Oh also. @musashi I feel like this is a post you may enjoy, and some of these are inspired by your video about Franziska. I'd also love to hear if you have any similar headcanons.

#ace attorney #franziska von karma #franziska ace attorney #maya fey #autism #autistic maya fey #autistic franziska von karma #autistic experiences #ace attorney headcanon #happy autism month #im probably going to make one of these for Edgeworth and Phoenix too #franmaya #i nearly forgot that tag holy shit

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jakey-death-scene · 4 months

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Parents shoving an iPad and unlimited internet access into their kids' hands is actually really detrimental to disabled kids, like, no need to mention how bad it already is for the average abled kid but especially those with issues like autism.

I have an eight year old niece who has diagnosed ADHD and autism and she's on her iPad all day watching YouTube shorts and playing games. Her mom constantly assures me that it's not that bad and she makes sure she can't see any "weird stuff" and whatnot. But this kid is eight and she can barely read or count. Sure, she has learning issues, she's literally disabled. But I think when people talk about the negative effects of technology on kids they only really see when it affects abled kids.

When an abled kid can't count or read at age 8 you get worried. But a little girl with ADHD and autism is just... Normal? People aren't concerned at all. You can chalk everything up to the fact that she's disabled so it makes sense she can't grasp things so early. I have autism too and personally I learned to read at age 4. I know autistic experiences vary a lot and many children with autism have very legitimate learning issues but I refuse to sing out that this shit is in any way normal. Even if you think it's okay for autistic kids to learn basic things very late, even if you don't see why it's REALLY IMPORTANT EVEN MORE THAN NORMAL to encourage and help disabled kids to learn things, how does it not concern you to teach a MENTALLY DISABLED CHILD to get endless dopamine and brainrot from a fucking iPad all day. This is even MORE irresponsible parenting than if your kid was just "totally normal".

When I was lucky enough to get diagnosed really young we were still in the times when that information was used to more support and encourage me to learn, now it's 2023 and when a kid gets ADHD and autism diagnosis people just go "Oh well that means we can just throw in the towel, have fun with your iPad honey, the doctors said you have a mental disability so I guess we can just piss around with you now and act like it's normal"

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defectivegembrain · 11 months

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I think I've mentioned this before at some point, but I actually didn't even know I counted as disabled for like three years after my autism diagnosis. Even though I was in a special ed unit for a while. I knew I had a developmental disorder, I knew I was "special needs", but those terms don't hold the same historical, legal and social meaning. They don't lead to that sense of solidarity and community.

It was only when I went to a separate special school for kids with all kinds of disabilities, that I ever heard that word applied to me. It was a new friend there, this girl who had taken me around the yard when I first started, and introduced me to a load of people, all with completely different needs, and that was the first school experience where I think everyone saw me as just a person, where nobody stared or laughed at me or thought I was a problem to be fixed.

So this other time, I was with this girl at lunch, and we got to talking about our difficult experiences in mainstream schools. And at some point she just casually said "but we're all disabled here". She had cerebral palsy and it was very clear why she would be considered disabled, but this was a revelation in relation to myself. I later asked my mum if I was disabled and she said "yeah I guess you are", as though she hadn't thought about it. Despite years of fighting for me to get proper educational support, and reading and sharing with me so many resources about autism. That's how much the word and concept used to be avoided in basically any space where that was possible.

So like yeah, it's gonna bother me when people talk as if able-bodied is the opposite of disabled, or that there's something wrong with thinking mentally disabled people are welcome in a space that only stated it's about disability in general. Yes I'm gonna hate the term "abled neurodivergents" and not trust you if you say that. And no it's not that I think all spaces should be for people like me. It's fine that some aren't. But they can damn well express that without implying we're less legitimately disabled.

#disability #disability pride month #ableism #discourse #i guess

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stuckyfingers · 6 months

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I'm just thinking about autistic Steve...

(I'm not as well educated about autism as I'd like to be so do correct me if I'm wrong)

Like, he's always been 'weird' even apart from his physical disabilities. He's felt a kind of self hatred over how sensitive he is to little things that are wrong but he can't explain why.

He hated talking but also loved talking about one specific thing that noone had any idea why he liked. (If someone can headcanon his hyperfixation, that'd be great). Either way, it didn't make him very popular among his peers. As a child he'd get bullied for just about anything because of how many faux pas-es he made.

He'd try to get home as soon as possible from school and shut himself into his plywood cabin of a room and cry. Bucky theorized that he was a vampire because of how much he liked fabric lined dark places.

He never guessed it wasn't normal to hate wearing clothes, so he continued living in constant discomfort and caution. Sarah had caught on to the specificities of how he needed his food and tried her best to get his safe foods on the table despite being poor. (Yes, she even called it that.)

Did I mention he also starts crying when he can't predict his day. And when things get more and more uncertain with the Depression swinging in, he gets so stressed that his heart problems worsen.

But having Bucky as a friend helps them both survive the times. Bucky was the only person who seemed unconcerned and unjudgmental about Steve's 'moodiness' and 'fidgeting'. He tried to understand when Steve described sensory overloads to him, and though he couldn't relate he accommodated Steve as much as he could.

Steve was frighteningly smart and picked up on every social cue he found, organizing them into a mental flowchart, assuming that this was what everyone did. But for most of his childhood he saw himself as less smart because Bucky seemed to be able to tell him things that he somehow still missed.

"Well how the fuck am I supposed to know that if they don't give any indication of being sarcastic?"

"Because it's not sarcasm, Steve... It's just- talking shop. A fake nice word, just because."

"How am I supposed to tell the difference?"

"Well, you just do. I don't know how you could... consciously do it."

By the miracle of God (and Bucky) he pushes through Eugenics era until 1943.

The Serum brings color to his eyes and more sound to his bad ear.

And he hates it.

But what's new is how much more physical energy he has to mask it.

It feels comparatively better to be able to mask without getting exhausted so fast, so he assumes his 'weirdness' has been cured and goes to war. In his line of work, however, he never gets a day's rest for his brain that craved routine, and because of how he's now able to push the feeling deep down and cover it up, Bucky can hardly recognize him.

And when he's out of the ice, his brain is turned to mush at having to learn new cues along with being autistic but anyone in that situation would have found it as difficult, so he passes it off.

One day he sees one of the people at Sam's VA talked about how their autism shaped their experience of PTSD differently, and Steve did the customary google search to learn more about it.

It said 'can't make eye contact'. But he knew the correct ratio of eye contact / looking away and what part of the eye he could look at so that it wouldn't drive him mad.

It said 'sensory issues' and he felt bad for those who actually had it because that must be horrible.

'Black and White thinking' okay but that doesn't mean- but see, he did know that illegal things weren't necessarily bad, right? He was ready to accept the criminality of something if it was a means to a moral end. And maybe there were some things that he could not see any nuance in but there were so many things he could. He couldn't have believed in Bucky if his thinking was Black and White right?

'Lack of empathy' No. Steve didn't understand people's feelings immediately, but he always logically guessed when they needed help. He kept note of the things that people found comforting so that he could be of comfort when they were down. He was empathetic, right?

He knew he wasn't autistic. (spoiler alert, he's just reading the symptoms from an outside perspective)

It's when he starts following more and more autistic creators that he felt less wrong for those weird things he did as a kid. He chuckles nervously scrolling through the tiktoks like "Ha ha why are ya'll so relatable"

He's not immune to the stigma but comes to terms with it. It feels a lot like how he came to terms with being queer. He's even surprised when he realizes that he was also wrongly assuming that it was gone because of the serum when it just became more manageable (for others) when he did.

Bucky listens like he always did when Steve explains things to him. And after a long while of living his truth with Bucky, Steve gets more comfortable describing himself as autistic to other people as well.

He starts experimenting with stimming, which already feels MILES better than forcing himself into a 'calm' and steady Captain's body language. Once he retires after Endgame, he surrounds himself with comfort and accommodations in his apartment and builds a routine he can finally be at peace with.

#autism #autistic Steve Rogers #Steve Rogers #stucky #recovery

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boy-above · 3 months

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absolutely hate how people treat adults who look younger than they actually are. like genuinely i wish people talked more about how borderline dehumanizing it can be to be treated like a baby your whole life no matter what you do. i have never once had a person correctly guess my age and i am perceived as a child by literally every person i have ever met; and they treat me accordingly. they speak down to me like i'm less worthy of respect, they treat me like i have little agency, and worst of all is when they use that certain specific voice that most people use when they talk to kids. yknow the like, "hey buddy how are you doing :) where are your parents? :)" and i have to be like i'm fucking 26 years old and half the time they don't believe you. i got carded at the chuck e cheese, they wouldn't let me Leave The Building until i showed them my ID. and you probably think that's so funny but you wouldn't if you were in my shoes. it's frustrating and embarrassing and just makes me tired. and do not even get me started on how people treat adults who look young who are in relationships. people call their partners creeps and weirdos, saying being attracted to a full grown adult is equivalent to being attracted to a child just because of how they look. if you think like this i need you to take a step back and think about what this mindset means for the "young looking" member of the relationship. you are telling us that we straight up aren't allowed to have relationships. not only are you saying our bodies should never be considered attractive, you're saying being attracted to us should be considered a crime. what are we supposed to do? do you expect us to find partners who also look as young as we do? are we supposed to jump through hoops to make you comfortable? do you know how hard finding a partner who looks your age is when you're this small, especially if you're attracted to men? why do i have to be made to feel guilty about wanting someone to be attracted to me? why do people not think about the implications of what being told it's disgusting to be attracted to you can do to a person? i wish there was more discussion about this because genuinely it's weighing me down. i'm already infantilized due to my autism and i probably won't ever be treated like an adult, not until i go fucking gray i guess. i just want a boyfriend, that shouldn't be a scandalous fucking statement

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boneinator · 5 months

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Hope this doesn’t bother you a lot, but can we get some headcanons of the teachers? I was curios about ur vision for them

Dw it doesn't bother me !! I love getting asks ^^

Anyway it's going under read more bc this feels like a long one

Sketch

• she/they enby, omnisexual (<- me when I'm projecting)

• mentor figure for the newer teachers

• gives drawings and crafts as gifts, might or might not have various voodoo dolls

• uses Colin as a monitor for digital art

Tony

• he/him, bisexual

• you CANNOT tell me he doesn't drink tea 24/7. Most British mf I have ever seen

• weird hearing, very sensitive to loud sounds but can barely hear normal talking tones. Applies to his own voice too so that's why he screams a lot

• kind of an inferiority complex for the decaying use of clocks over technology lol

Shrignold

• gay and homophobic idgaf

• aware of the harm he's doing but genuinely loves his cult- "family" a lot

• likes telenovelas, granny type of beat

Colin

• he/it Libramasc, pansexual (here I am, projecting once again)

• has haphephobia but is working on it (this one might as well be canon idk)

• everyone has a computer day, so even if you see him every day you only get screentime once a year

• autism 🫵

• his tail is retractable

• has SO MANY viruses, that's why he glitches and talks slow

Healthy band

• doing them all together bc how can you think of them alone :[ don't separate them

• common fanon of them being a family ykn the drill

• their "birthday" (or date of release lol) is actually fridge and steaks anniversary

• depending on the day they either make the most rancid bizarre food or a 5 stars, Gordon Ramsay approved meal

• running on the same luck, fridge can either be filled with normal groceries, nothing (you have to buy groceries) or gore. Like those are his guts leave him alone

• everyone hiding inside fridge is apparently a normal bonding experience

• bread boy is transfem !! (Should we start calling her something different?)

• spinach is also a she/they enby, nobody in here isn't lgbtq

Lamp

• he/him but doesn't really care, pansexual

• has been trying to be sober but he's already very fucked up, that's why he's like That™ in the TV show

• the other teachers we see in his episode are his party friends

• absolutely watches the others dreams, likes to bother them about what they mean

★ ok now the TV show ones

Briefcase

• has an absurd amount of skills, barbie kind of ridiculous

• lives with his brother and sustains them both

• workaholic

• was mr.petersons before red guy

• actually not that bad he's just really fast paced, genuinely just lost the trio on the fabric

Coffin

• he/him goth gf <3

• doesn't like music AT ALL. And is very mean about it

• besties with the tissue box !!

• originally only used his hush tone for work but it slowly morphed into his normal voice

• pretty bad PTSD

• very kind with kids and people in general tbh, it might be something useful for his job but it's just how he is really

Lily and Todney

• I don't think about them a lot sorry

• they know what they are doing and that their whole family dynamic is pretty fucked but they genuinely just really want a mom tho ,,,

Warren the wo-Eagle

• genuinely just hate him so I don't think about him a lot either lol

• had no power over the trio because he was fired and not technically a teacher anymore

• his whole Thing (ykn) comes from bullying and a feeling of inferiority. He still sucks tho

Mr.Transport

• well. I guess I just don't think a lot about the newer teachers

• was actually a really nice teacher before still going to work at 120 years old

• nobody really liked him but he was the other's only way of going outside the house so they endured him

• there was a fight over his will. People died

Electracey

• she/they enby n°3, lesbian

• really scared to touch her batteries now, has caused her to get cranky but still refuse to change them until forced

• puts up light shows for her friends

• huge sci-fi and videogames in general fan

• Colin's cousin. Actually all electronics are related

• wanted to be a music teacher but her biology said no

★ this is more of a general one but all of them are somewhere in the aroace spectrum !! I think it comes with the object nature. I have not defined where all of them fall tho

That's it I think. This is so long I am so sorry I just enjoy them a lot so I have a lot of thoughts

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sentimental-androids · 11 months

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Nonverbal.

This is the word that professionals, parents, and MANY neurodivergent people use for themselves when they find themselves unable to talk, or, yk, verbalize stuff.

If you look up nonverbal, like the definition, on Google, just about every entry will say something along the lines of "unable to verbalize or use speech to communicate".

Nowhere does it explicitly say that you have to be unable to speak...forever.

So uh...what's the deal, tumblr?

Like. Listen. I am autistic. I'm professionally diagnosed with ASD. I also have direct family members who have ASD. And literally for as long as I've known about autism, and specifically nonverbal as a term, it's been used to describe anybody who lacks the ability to verbally communicate. For any amount of time.

Recently, someone, idk who, came to me on tumblr, and all but told me that to call myself nonverbal was ableist. They said that nonverbal as a term is used explicitly for people who aren't EVER able to talk.

They told me to use the phrase "speech loss" instead.

Initially I was off put by this. Speech loss. I mean I guess that is technically a way of phrasing it, and I don't really want to be ableist, so... sure. Why not.

But the more I thought about it, the more absurd it started to seem. Speech loss?? Speech loss?????

It's such a mouthful. Doesn't roll off the tongue like at all. I have speech issues even when I CAN verbalize and even just this little thing makes trying to talk about my issues frustrating enough that I don't want to do it.

And for what?

It's the same thing. It's literally the same thing. Both are periods in which an individual is physically or mentally unable to communicate verbally or in any spoken form. (Surprise, I don't get to choose when or for how long I experience "speech loss".) It is still a LACK of verbal communication. By definition....

It's still nonverbal.

I also recently was able to talk to someone else about this issue! And it hit me how chronically online this cold take is. Like, I'm sorry, but no professionals are calling it "speech loss". That's an internet (specifically tumblr) born issue. People in real life, in the real world that actually matters, aren't calling it "speech loss".

I also heard from that individual that some people are pushing to call it "nonspeaking episodes"...which is even worse/more clunky than speech loss. Why would you suggest that. People with ASD commonly struggle with speech. This is just an added frustration.

And like not only does that tell me that people aren't considering how it actually sounds irl (probably bc nobody irl is using either), it also shows that...it isn't even like. A widespread or known thing. Bc its a new issue that some jokers made up for some reason!! Like it's not even coordinated enough for there to just be one overcomplicated word for it.

So this is my little psa.

Stop saying it's ableist. It's not. Stop saying it's inaccurate. It's not.

If you or a loved one has been told that it is, it's not. You need not consider that fact any longer. It was honest to goodness probably someone looking to stir up drama.

We don't need any more division in the community, especially over something that...literally is a non-issue. Nonverbal people are all valid nonverbals. Leave em be.

#actually autistic #asd #autistic community #autistic culture #autism discourse #personal post #important #dizzycourse

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sophieinwonderland · 7 months

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Hi, I'm a system and have mutliple other disorders. All "cis" if you will. I'm not here to shame anyone but I would genuinely like to know how this makes sense to you? I want to know your persepctive because I don't understand and maybe I can get some more insight from someone else. I feel invalidated when people talk about endogenic and "transsystems" because my disorder is not an aesthetic and I had to go through so much trauma that turned me into who I am today and not in a good way. It's painful and it hurts when I see people making fun of my experience by saying they've acquired their system "naturally" even though that's not how the disorder works (By "making fun of" I mean that's how it feels). It also feels transphobic to hijack trans wording such as "cis" and "trans" even though disorders are different to gender. Gender is a social construct and disorders are just not. They can't go away, they can't change. I can never get my childhood back and I struggle to be able to be myself with my Autism and ADHD, I find it hard to keep relationships from the immense anxiety I've gotten from my CPTSD symptoms and the chronic mistrust I've had to develop to survive. I guess I just want to ask why? Why you believe in these things? It's not that I hate you, I don't, I genuinely want to understand because currently I feel hurt, and upset, and made fun of in a way I've never felt before and I just want to know the logic and reasoning behind this kind of stuff before I make a judgement.

This is an old post, so it's entirely possible you've already made up your mind on these issue now. But either way, I decided I might as well answer now

Personally, I feel these are different subjects.

First...

Disorders Are a Social Construct

Not in the same way as gender or race, mind you.

Rather, disorders are bureaucratic labels tacked onto symptoms. These symptoms may or may not actually be related.

We live in a universe with DID and OSDD-1 are considered separate disorders. But it doesn't have to be like that. Maybe in another universe, they would be the same disorder.

Or, maybe in one universe, DID wouldn't exist and OSDD-1a and 1b would be two separate disorders, with DID just being the comorbidity between these two things.

Maybe your ADHD would actually be branded as a type of autism, or autism could still be considered a classification of Schizophrenia. Many psychiatrists actually dislike the disorder model, and would prefer focusing on individual symptoms instead.

Also, some disorders can go away, and some disorders can change. Well, the diagnosis will still remain, but that's more another matter of the bureaucracy. If you're depressed for two weeks, you get a diagnosis. Then the symptoms can go away for 30 years, but you'll retain that diagnosis forever.

I Think You Can Experience Dysphoria For Anything

The reason I feel how I do on transX identities is because I've seen people in the plural community with memories of living completely different lives. People who feel uncomfortable with every aspect of the body they inhabit.

I've personally felt inadequate for lacking the intelligence and education of my source.

I know some who feel phantom limb-like experiences relating to parts they never had like wings and tails.

And psychologists have acknowledged and researched BIID, where people will feel like they should have a certain physical condition.

And so I totally believe it's possible to have dysphoria for anything, including mental conditions you don't have. It doesn't make rational sense why someone would want certain conditions, but the brain rarely makes rational sense and it would be a mistake to assume it needs to.

Endogenic Systems Are Different

I don't believe endogenic systems are a result of or related to dysphoria at all, outside of transplurals.

I believe endogenic plurality is a naturally occurring condition. We can see this in the ease of which people are able to divide themselves into parts in Internal Family Systems. The autonomy of imaginary friends as children. And the fact that many unrelated cultures around the world have reported nonpathological spiritual possession through history.

Most endogenic plurality isn't people who feel like they need to be plural or feel dysphoric for being a singlet. It's just a different experience that's been largely ignored by psychology until the past decade.

I've been collecting studies on these various phenomena here:

Personally, I find the imaginary friend studies most interesting. In the past, it was assumed that imaginary friends were purely controlled by the child hosts, but more evidence keeps stacking up showing that this isn't the case and that these are natural fully autonomous agents.

These experiences have been ignored by psychiatry for a long time because they just weren't pathological, and they were hidden enough that psychiatry could dismiss them as just pretend or fake.

#syscourse #pro endo #pro endogenic #transx #transid #transabled #sysblr #rad inclus #multiplicity

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dogboyjackkennedy · 15 days

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even MORE kennedy family hcs if possible :evil:

woo!

and on today's headcanons: Visits With Family (when Jack and Peter were little)

(* also keep in mind: Jack is trans)

Visits with Marshall's Family (aka Dad's side of the family):

Marshall's family is. Loud. not great for sensory issues.

Jack and Peter have a lot of cousins on that side. so lots of people to play with.

Jack was always a more rambunctious kid, something that a lot of other kids found weird for a "little girl," but his cousin were just like "well, as long as she* can keep up, then she can play!"

Jack could, in fact, keep up

they were definitely more understanding about some of Jack and Peter's sensory issues, and the fact that they couldn't exactly help it. didn't help the noise problem, though

when Jack came out as trans, they didn't fully get it, but they were chill (especially Aunt Jan, she thought it was cool :]). His grandfather said "Well, Marshall, I guess that means you've got another man to help you around the house, eh?" even though Jack was. very much already doing that

all in all? pretty nice, just a bit too loud for the two of them to spend much time around.

Visits with Diane's Family (aka Mom's side):

hell. It Is Hell.

Diane's family absolutely sucks and is shitty to just about everyone, and that extends to their grandkids.

they give zero shits about any texture issues Jack or Peter might have. oh, you didn't like the dress we gave you, Jackie? how ungrateful, that cost us a lot of money, you know. what do you mean Peter doesn't like the onions in the spaghetti sauce because he doesn't like how squishy they are? well, he's either gonna have to man up or starve, because we're not making him something different just because he can't stop being a crybaby.

seriously, it got to the point that Diane would have to call her parents before they visited so she could make sure they were actually making something that Peter and Jack could eat.

her family also tried to shove Gender Roles onto her kids. which Diane fucking hated, by the way

Jack like wearing pants more since skirts and dresses typically had the Worst fucking textures. it wasn't even necessarily because he hated the dresses and stuff themselves, it was just because it was impossible to find anything (affordable) that didn't have World's Worst Fucking Texture. unfortunately uh. Diane's Family Was Very Judgemental About This. if any family pictures were being taken, then Jack was basically shoved into a dress. this should go without saying, but Jack Fucking Hated That.

due to Diane's family shoving gender roles on everyone despite how much they all fucking HATE it, Jack's usually laughed off whenever he wants to play with some of the boys. playing with the girls also sucks because "they don't ever wanna talk about dogs or go garden with me in the dirt because they "dOn't waNnA GeT meSsY". they just gossip and have no idea how to do hair Gently" (< Jack doesn't mind gossip, but theirs was Boring, and uh. Need I Remind You Of The Autism)

due to this, Jack Really Hates Visiting That Side Of The Family.

coming out as trans was. A Fucking Nightmare. Diane tried to make it clear that they supported her son, but her parents were just like Oh, so Jacqueline's one of Those people, huh? you can. Imagine how things went from there

anyway, completely unrelated, but Jack and Peter kinda cut that side of the family off after their parents died. I'm Sure There's No Particular Reason For That

#dsaf #jack kennedy #peter kennedy #The Kennedy Parents (dsaf)

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