#but i realized ive never posted them cause i only started posting my art on here again like | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

salemoleander · 1 year

Note

VERY interested in creator commentary for the 3rd life webweave (seriously one of the coolest things ive seen made in this fandom, its gorgeously edited AND very funny AND the quotes themselves are all knock-your-socks off material. That Rosencrantz And Guildenstern Line Holy Shit)

Okay so first off THANK YOU that's super kind! It's nerve-wracking posting graphic design that is reconstituted from other sources, bc I've seen it perceived as a 'lazy' or unskilled format, so this is really really encouraging to hear.

I am not a concise person, which is why this has taken so long! I realized as I was initially responding that I was trying to dive into three separate topics:

The actual process I follow, my tips + tricks on making web weaves

Analysis of my 3rd Life web weave

My philosophy towards web weaves and collage as an art form

Only one of those is the question you actually asked, so #2 is what I'll be talking about in this post! However, I am working on a video overview of the other topics, because I think they're worth exploring - I will obviously post that on this blog once it's done.

To avoid jumpscaring anyone with a wall of text, I've thrown my commentary under a readmore.

The one takeaway I'll mention before we dive in is if anyone has a character/narrative web weave request, please hit me up! I have so many I'm working on, having a next topic suggestion is super helpful to narrow things down.

General Creation Comments

I am At All Times collecting images, so it's only a matter of time until I make a webweave for a group/ concept/ person:

(My phone storage is Certainly being utilized. Also I will never be free of making these.)

It just so happened that my Third Life folder filled up fastest/ felt like it was in a good balance to work with, so that's what I started with!

I try to use a mix of text and images, and both serious and funny stuff. Even at its most serious the Life Series is also funny, and it's important to reflect that!

That said, if you compare the jokes I've picked in this piece vs the void falling web weave, you'll notice the jokes on this one trend sharper. The 'How to Detect Misery' and 'How to Tell if it's Over' memes (both from @thatsbelievable, who is a GREAT source of web weave content) are morbidly funny. Surviving horrific circumstances, preparing to suffer, unimaginable violence, eroticism and death, covered in blood - all of the jokes are violent.

As I go, I weed out posts that don't fit, or (mostly) prune text posts out. Too much text ruins the flow, and I LOVE words so I tend to have too much writing and not enough art.

3rd life had only a few things that didn't make the cut, bc I was fairly judicious as I added to that folder, but these were scrapped:

As I added the posts I knew I wanted and split them between panels, I naturally started seeing a 'flow' from early game biomes/bases and the more tender pairings, into violence + devotion, and then ending in.. something. I wasn't sure what I wanted the end to be yet.

I ran out of posts, and knew I needed Wayyy more images to offset the text, so I went looking through the Smithsonian's excellent collection of CC0-licensed art!

That's where I found the Perfect Image - that last picture of the red angel laid low. I knew immediately that it needed to be most of the final scene, with very little obscuring or distracting from it.

Okay, diving into specific panel analysis!

Panel One

It's the beginning, so everything is still fairly light - lots of brown and green tones.

The summary (imo) is that every faction in 3rd Life is in different stories!

Grian and Scar are playing cowboys, an old Western style narrative where they're beholden to each other, out to get the Bad Guys (even if objectively they're the ones being violent little instigators).

Flower Husbands are a greek fucking tragedy, Jimmy's sudden loss and Scott in mourning, trying to cause as much destruction as possible before the gods knock him down too.

Dogwarts are a middle English story of fealty and homosocial bonds and dying for honor.

And the Crastle is like. Shakespeare or Arthur Miller or Stoppard. They are in a theater, they are playing with all of the narratives. Too aware of the trajectory they're on, and entirely unable to stop it.

The images on the first page are the four primary pairings in 3rd Life - top left, in the background of the 'How to Detect Misery' meme, is the desert. The sudden punchline of that meme felt like a good starting point - a creeper-blast of a joke.

The pair to the right represent Scott and Jimmy. I liked the Impressionist and classic myth-inspired stylization. Also, the toga blended near-seamlessly into the desert hill so it looked almost like a wing, implying a tie to angels as well as foreshadowing Jimmy's death AND Scott's partnership with Grian/Scar.

Up in the top right-hand corner is a little Crastle, and the pair embracing on the right side of the page are Bdubs and Cleo. The red hair fit, but it was the old-fashioned clothing and sense of finality that I really liked.

On the left is Dogwarts - Ren and Martyn. I wanted an image that had a very different style, as they were opposed to desert duo + everyone else. I felt the sketchy ink stood out and elicited ideas of worn vellum paper. It felt like a sketch you'd discover sitting in a chest of a long-worn-down enchanting room.

There's a forest and a mostly-occluded castle in the background art on page one, also meant to represent Dogwarts. That forest bleeds into the next page, where the violence really begins.

Panel Two

We've started with a forest, but it's darker than the last one, and wilder.

Bursts of red stand out violently on the page.

'Fallen Angel' is a classic for emotionally fraught blorboposting! There are many, Many Mountain Goats songs that fit, but the way a-doctor-not-a-fangirl paired this line with this painting was striking to me. In particular, I like how 'getting revenge' was something that drove most of 3rd Life, even though Red Lives (come unhinged) were meant to be the driving force of violence. They weren't supposed to have bonds, they weren't supposed to have allies! But it's the bonds that drove the violence.

The 'I heart eroticism and death' cut-out plopped onto the collage was intended to feel like a kind of cheesy tourist stamp - 'I killed my friends in horrible death games and all I got was this lousy t-shirt' vibes.

The 'First off' comment feels like the illogical thought proces all of the doomed players (so, all of the players) were following - "if I just do well enough at murder, this will all be over."

The 'moments of grace' image is probably my most indulgent addition. I wanted a softer, quiet nod to the good parts, to the fun and the joy in between the violence. In particular, the dawn breaking on waves reminded me of the short span Grian and Scar spent tensely placing TNT under sand in the desert. I imagine silent cooperation and the sussuration of sand on sand, and quiet for just a few minutes.

'It's better to know how to let others unmask you and to endure the rule of the game' means: if you are too good, if you survive long enough, you will end up alone. This is about Bdubs and Cleo - kings of roleplay, of being a little overeager and dying for it and getting a mercifully quick ending. It is also about the cactus ring.

Panel Three

The centerpiece of this page is 'G-d's Idea', the beautiful abstract painting of a blood-soaked angel. It makes me insane every time I see it. Grim reaper in mourning kinda guy

I wanted to do something to tie more directly to the end, but didn't want to pull a disembodied-face-in-90s-grad-photo approach to add Scar. So I found a drawing that looked like the Monopoly Mountain build, and carefully added it onto one wing. I really really like this as an addition, it is probably my favorite combination in this post.

The Anne Carson quote is obvs in Minecraft font - I also split up the lines, so that the left and right side loosely create their own sentences/ideas. "There is a theory that watching other people is good for you" and "Unbearable stories may cleanse you of your darkness." I wish I had been more careful with the contrast on 'yourself all', but oh well, we can just call it being difficult to read an experiential facet of the poem.

"Do you want to go down to the pits of yourself all alone?" is a good fucking line, and manages to mirror both the commentary on us the viewers AND the experience of the creators AND the experience of the characters. We get to experience violence vicariously, the creators get to experience it with friends + in safety, and the characters (or character, I should say, just Grian left by the time you're reading this) are experiencing that low point totally alone.

Aside from the obvious fit, the Rosencrantz + Guildenstern lines stand in as a conversation between the viewers and the characters. The appraising description of kiling and dying beautifully makes way for a mournful interruption that no, fuck that, this isn't a game for us (with some obvious irony there).

Finally, I needed it to end funny; the whole thing is already more serious than it probably should've been. I like this joke because it's short, and it implies the aftermath in a comedic way. Picturing everyone spawning back into Hermitcraft, covered in blood, upset, but mostly with a profoundly awkward sense of 'well I fucked that one up. That got a bit more homoerotic than intended, and now every other shopping trip I have to make awkward eye contact with the person I mcMurdered."

Again, thank you so much for your ask and kind words! I'm looking forward to making a general guide video on web weaves one of these days :D

#salem tag #salem chatter #3lsmp #3lsmp meta #i am going to go pass out but i hope some of this is what you were hoping to hear about lol #salem answer

10 notes · View notes

llapdog · 11 months

Text

the OFFICIAL god is home retrospective

well, i was gonna make this an update to the website, and maybe i will, or maybe ill just link it on the last page. but i have an account on tumblr already, and ive tried to keep godishome posting to a minimum. so this is just a little post (possibly long. i havent written it yet, after all.) (update: it's long.) about god is home, the process of making it, my thoughts on it at this point in my life, and what i might (heavy on that might!) be working on next. put under a read more, for your sake.

happy 200 notes, god is home.

the first thing i should say is the typical "artist gets any amount of success" thing: i am absolutely shocked by the reception god is home got.

ive been shocked. i dont think its undeserved (im actually pretty up my own ass about my own work, which i refuse to feel shame or apologize for) but it is still unexpected; as my first foray into proper Web Art territory, it really shouldn't have done that well. i mean, 200 notes isn't breaking any grounds, honestly, but it is still kind of incredible for what a small-scale project is. it will, i theorize, reach higher points, too. i suspect one day someone will find it again through pure chance, and it will get another little burst of reblogs, as tends to happen on this website. and thatll be surprising, and, most likely, embarrassing. but i digress.

while i've certainly implied it, i don't think i've ever explicitly stated that god is home is not technically my first online art project. god is home comes from a litany of personal projects. ARG concepts that never went anywhere, personal sites for the perusal of my friends made in an afternoon, countless ideas and concepts shared between discord dms and voice calls. but it is, uniquely, the only one of my works that has been shared publicly, not counting the old ARG that my once-friend-now-enemy created that i caused the spiraling death of. not saying which one, but i doubt anyone would remember it if i did.

that's to say nothing of the countless writing projects i've started and never finished. shoutout to all the half-baked haunted house manuscripts i got several chapters into before giving up on. your memory lives on in my singular success, and your influence will be felt for as long as i am creating.

that influence already lives, though. many of the ideas of unfinished projects crystalized in the story of god is home: haunted houses (and really houses in general, my obsession with them as a literal device so intense that it made me realize i am probably autistic), frayed relationships, failed parenting, living spaces, and the search for God where He cannot be. i've been obsessed with many of these ideas for as long as i can remember, and as such i have been unable to create anything unrelated to them until i could say with certainly that i had something to show for it, some published expression of my love for these themes.

god is home, therefore, has set me free. at least a little bit. i have felt legitimately tied to the narrative of a haunted house, inexplicably connected to it in a way that has felt inescapable. of course, gih does not take that haunting literally, but i feel it's felt in the corners, most prominently in the ending sequence. it is a house haunted by its inhabitants, by their relationship, and, of course, by God, or the lack thereof.

this isn't to say i'm done with haunted houses. i wouldn't want to be. i couldn't be. but i am at least willing to write about something else, now.

but for as personal as god is home is, its also not made for me. i believe i talked about this briefly in the actual website, but i made this with and for my friends. i was helped explicitly by gerry (@graveyardcat7, shoutouts) who did the art, and who also was the only one who "playtested" this thing before i showed it to the larger friend group. that group, those three people (really four, counting myself), are who this was made for. it wasn't for you, unless you're one of them. my audience is nearly singular.

that has made public reception to this both baffling, wonderful, and difficult. i certainly don't want to act like i'm tortured because people (checks notes) liked the thing i made, but it is certainly strange to see something so personal, almost private be largely taken as a piece of Relatable Media. it's meaningful, of course, indescribably so. theres a kind of beauty i didn't expect to knowing people found themselves in an expression of my own thoughts. to everyone who has expressed the importance of this story to them, i thank you.

what makes it even more baffling is that i fully expected myself to be portraying many aspects of this story incorrectly. while it is incredibly personal, it certainly isn't autobiographical. i don't particularly want to go into how, exactly, the story lines up with my life, but i think the most obvious and important is that i actually have very little personal experience with christianity. im not a stranger to it; i have vague memories of going to church, of knowing i was wrong in the eyes of god, in being vaguely uncomfortable with the visages of jesus' crucifixion.

but i am, ultimately, agnostic. an agnostic christian, maybe, but my family barely even celebrates christmas. i was also raised by an explicit atheist for the vast majority of my life, my father leaving the church when i was young. and my parents are some of the most supportive people in my life. they knew i was a girl when i was a kid, and they did everything in their power to make my life comfortable as a trans person (including, notably, talking to the organizers of a pre-school event to try and convince them to let me be tinkerbell instead of peter pan.)

my mother is christian, but she never forced it upon me. my religion was always a choice. and yet, somehow, christianity still got its claws in me, and i still fear hell. funny how that works. chalk it up to america in general, maybe.

a lot of the positive feedback ive received has been about its portrayal of christianity and the struggles of growing up in and around the church. so im glad i got that right. it is something i care about rather deeply, and i worried i had been portraying it borderline fetishisticly, despite my efforts to make it fair.

i worried a lot about what i was portraying, actually. theres this line i had to establish that i wasnt talking out my ass about this stuff, while still not wanting people to speculate about who i am, what my traumas are. i still dont want you speculating, by the way. it happens without meaning to, of course, but... you know. im a person, and to most of you, a stranger.

(shoutout to innuendo studio's and errant signal's videos on the beginners guide. made me fear being analyzed for all time. i watched them both as a kid.)

it's funny, but i feel like, in some aspects, god is home is more representative of the media that shaped me than the events in my life that shaped me. the most obvious inspirations are likely the indie web itself, deltarune, komaedalovemail, and, of course, hypnospace outlaw, a game that has shaped me deeper than i can really express. but the inspirations are innumerable; serial experiments lain probably shaped more of this project than you would ever guess (a fact i only realized after i started playing the psx game this week, hilariously), the album tallahassee by the mountain goats, the fucking chezzkids website, house of leaves, creepypasta, tabletop roleplaying games i played with my friends, jacob geller (particularly his haunted house analysis), several dozen modern art pieces, meow wolf the art collective, the goddamn aids crisis. (the aids crisis isnt media, but still, i can't exactly claim it as personal experience.) there's more, i know there's more, but it's escaping me.

it's an aggregation of things half-remembered. all art is. yet, i still feel some masturbatory urge to catalogue those inspirations. it is, i suspect, a very human urge.

but, ultimately, all of this is just pretext. i should probably get on with actually talking about making the damn thing. i made god is home in a week, largely at a job as a receptionist in a tax office. the work was seasonal, my coworkers deeply religious in the same way i was writing about. i hid my computer screen a lot. (my boss was cool with it, funnily enough.)

often, my best work is done in a fugue state. god is home is most of what i did for that week. i wrote, or i coded, or i looked up coding tutorials. and for a first draft made in a week with very little oversight, i think it's incredible it turned out that well. but... well, it is ultimately a first draft.

there's things i would change. most obviously, i would have an actual password input for that damn puzzle. the honest reason there isn't one is because i couldn't easily google a solution to implementing one. it is my deepest regret, and i hope you can all forgive me for this glaring mistake. i think some of the writing could be cleaner, or sharper, or more evocative. not that i have any interest in going for a second lap. gih is done, and it will remain done for the forseeable future.

...i don't have much else to say on that, honestly. i think my work is good. i think the central relationship is compelling. i think mary and michael are two of my favorite characters i've made, ever. as an author's secret, i totally think they should be t4t. i didn't make them a couple because it wouldn't have worked for the story i was telling, but it remains a sort of headcanon ending for the two of them. not for a while, though. don't take this as word of god, though. whatever you think their relationship is is correct. i'm not your dad.

i'm proud of the way i told their story. i'm glad it ends hopefully. hope is the main thing i wanted out of this story.

that being said, i do have one last thing to say: god is home is not an arg, and it makes me really sad to see people call it that. not a callout if you did that, though. i knew it would happen. its inherent that any media will be, in some way, misinterpreted. misinterpreting is the stuff media analysis is made up of, really.

so... that's the actual retrospective. but i promised i'd talk about what i might work on. so here's that.

i'm planning on making a personal site next, provided i can get the motivation. please note that i've been "planning on making a personal site" since the day gih was released, and so far i have done the following:

made a new neocities account

so it'll probably be a while. but if i ever do, it'll have some new story hidden in the margins. i don't think i have it in me to make a home without a few skeletons in the closet.

as for what that story will be... i have about a hundred different ideas. your guess is as good as mine, but know that it won't be about a house this time. most likely. hopefully.

i do also have plans to do something with unhomes, the sort-of-ARG mentioned in gih. i'm not done with this world, and i know i'll find some way to come back to it. maybe even back to michael and mary, but i make no promises.

alright. that's all i got.

i'm glad i made god is home, ultimately, and i'm glad it got some legitimate appreciation. if you're one of the people who likes it, thats rad. i'm sincerely incredibly appreciative of those of you who got something out of my work.

bye-bye. see you soon, hopefully.

#gih #long post #fair warning: this thing is fairly #stream of consciousness #i guess #rambly #but its honest #at least #bedroom #youre allowed to reblog this if you want by the way #idk if anyone would but like. you can. idc.

5 notes · View notes

spikeinthepunch · 9 months

Text

Penrose: Dawning- the dev blog

Okay well my game has been up for a few days now, and the Jam is over so yeah, why not give a massive blog about it and the development and characters and feelings etc.

again this was quite a feat for me, so to say. as small as the game is. ive been struggling a ton for years and years, so the process and experience has stuck with me for the last month.

The personal

If you have followed and read some of my posts from the last month youd probably seen me talking about having seen a neurophysiologist-- my appointments for that were happening for quite a while before this month but this month was the end of it. Aside from it clearly being a huge stressor in general, it was also a huge eye opener to my problems. Which yeah, include my ability to Make Things. Not art- but everything else. The listening & reading comprehension, math and memory I tested on being really really bad. And it was great to understand that now! but having decided to take on the Jam was a lot and well, even though on one hand i felt good that I knew my issues.... it didn't mean i solved my issues. Now i was just way more away of them.

So, I tried my hardest I think because I knew I'd always give up on this stuff. And well, my mood meds were still kinda helping. I think there was a different kind of determination despite the upset that some of those tests caused me. Still, I faced a lot of anxiety, frusteration, and upsetting feelings in the process because of how hard it was for me to learn even the smallest things. I won't go super hard on that-- I just want to appreciate the small community of Narrat for being able to help and clarify my confusion even if I'd often say to myself "ugh, that was such a simple thing! i shouldnt need to get it clarified two times over!" etc etc.

still despite the variety of emotions i faced i came out of this really thinking 'wow i actually made something' because literally all these years i have never realized a larger project due to my issues. so for that i can be happy.

The development

the process of making this game was interesting because obvious i had never put my assumptions about the best way to develop to the test. i could think all the while "ill do this first, this second etc" but until you start making it you may realize you gotta do something else!

the fact this was only a month long didnt really give me much time to figure out better ways to develop, it i was already a ways into it. so i came out realizing what i could do diffferent. one thing for sure is i know i couldnt start with art. its just not possible in general to predict the art i would need clearly, because even if i were to write a lot, i felt that making dialog branches was much easier while i was coding because i never knew how far i would want them to go.

but also, in terms of writing- i already write a lot and i kinda have my mental process. getting that to work with the game was tough, and while i liked how i wrote for this game, i feel like it faltered in the sense that writing so many bits of it entirely away from each other had my struggling to make sure i felt connected. like, writing on one huge document allows me to easily refer back and having it all together makes it flow well in my head. but having them scattered around code was hard for me to track and i was never sure if it all felt like it connected up well. i also think in general if i wrote most of the important chunks- stuff not incredibly reliant on branches/choices- that i probably would have written waaaay more too. its just a format of writing that is natural.

there isnt too much as i did in the game coding wise so i dont have too many comments on development process. but i know i would like to make games in narrat that use the typical features found in games like DE (as the engine was inspired by), like stats/skills and maybe inventory depending on the thing.

The story & design

i dont plan to explain the story in detail here (a lot of secret context it on my discord) and i have talked loads about trying to write the themes its tackled.

the main thing about it is just that i have never properly realized Penrose and well. I was facing a creative block this last month which caused more struggles. But it was harder with art- mostly design. coming up with a design is harder in a block than reading a thing that says "draw a series of houses". thinking up something new is not easy. and my head also gets very stuck up in "if you design this and draw it, you can never change it".

Eden was pulled from my old unused RP character, Eden Creature, and so i was able to base her off something already. even so making anything at all was hard- even for Mick who already existed. I really didnt want her and Eden to revert back into my old style because its just no me anymore but at the same time i do want to get something unique for this story. Dawning does not reflect what I want exactly. I like what i managed to do esp in working with my time constraints. but, its not something i want to keep doing going forward.

the story was WAY more condensed than i thought it would be and its because i didnt really realize how quickly approaching the deadline was compared to my work. but at the same time i am glad it was? i was quite ambitious with how big i wanted this "proof of concept" to be, to where i definitely probably would have gotten farther in the plot and realized i had no clue exactly what I wanted.

because i do have a general idea of this story but not like. enough. and so shortening the story hugely for this demo was actually a good thing because i would have had to write a lot more and also probably wouldnt have been able to explain lore well enough because of how little i understood my own world. and when youre creative blocked its incredibly hard trying to development of that world too.

conclusion

i mentioned it breifly in a blog post but tbh the most scary part is having it hit that i am nervous has to how people will take my characters. not in a criticism kinda way but just the idea that people just wont really 'get' them. and even just the idea that my OCs have been "presented to the world" in some sense. i do stuff in my own little space all the time and never think about what it would really be like to put a game on itch.io or even like publish a proper animation on youtube or publish a book or something. its different and its weird because i have always thought to myself that i want people to see my OCs! but then i put it up in a place where it likely will be seen and I am afraid of that.

its probably for it being a first time. and also i need to learn confidence in this kind of work i was so into thinking i could never truly make because of my issues. this was still like, very very hard to do mentally etc and i feel very exhausted. but i really dont want this to be the first and last time i try and make something.

#penrose #dev blog

1 note · View note

pridewishes · 2 years

Note

Also i saw that post about you talking to your coworkers about sonic/horror movies, and i wanted to ask what you thought of them! Personally I loved them so much!!!! I wasn't that interested at first, i did really like the 1st one, but it didn't have too much plot related to the actual games (BUT it did get me into the sonic franchise!) I really didn't know all that much... i had really only seen stuff from watching the sonic fandubs from snapcube lmao! But when the end credits seen came around i was shaking my dad like "OH MY GOD. DAD. THATS TAILS!! HOLY CRAP THATS TAILS!! AAA!!" And when the second movie was close i really started getting excited cause i knew quite a bit more!! I was so happy when Idris Elba did that interview and was like "yeah im really excited for this role ive been researching knuckles alot!!" LIKE. OMG..... PEOPLE WORKING ON THIS MOVIE ACTUALLY CARE SO MUCH ABOUT THE FRANCHISE AND DOING IT JUSTICE...... Like also with the animation and art style being changed (mad props to them by the way!!!) which is something you rarely see in films made it so much better... AND IM SO EXCITED FOR THE THIRD ONE EEEE!! I was hopping up and down and freaking out(/pos) at the second one's end credit scene!!! I could go on but i just realized ive infodumped a wall of text in your inbox... haha whoops...

OMG HI I adore waking up to ppl info dumping in the inbox or asking our feelings abt things its so nice !! Ok so for some background I never grew up with Sonic despite my other interests ik I would have loved it but I got into sonic after we graduated high school! It was something I'd been slightly into but I got super immersed after hs. We played a ton of the games and watched some of the cartoons and my favorites are Sonic X and Sonic Adventure 2! As for the films they were wonderful. I was kinda meh as well at first but the first was very fun and then the 2nd was INCREDIBLE. I loved how they portrayed Knuckles and he's my 2nd favorite character out of the franchise so it was awesome to me. The scene with him and Sonic on the beach always makes me tear up and the end to that one was AWESOME I had brought my shadow plush along and was insanely excited about it!

#asking 🍒

3 notes · View notes

mindrole · 2 months

Text

lately im properly keeping off my wrist, ive never had an injury (at least not from strain, ive hurt it def though, i got launched off a treadmill once when i was a kid) but i fear it, so i'm being vigilant. i'm fine tho. but its really boring cuz i usually doodle to fall asleep...

but i was thinking like, cell series character designs are really great, i think there's a wonderful uniqueness to them in the design philosophy, but

isn't everyone so difficult to draw....?!?!!! usually i feel like... after the first few times i don't need to pull up a reference anymore, but with the characters in this series no matter how many times, i still look up refs, btw did you know shinano has two tone hair? it's not a shadow.

shinano in fact is up there in difficulty... i think balancing his facial proportions is difficult... he should be so cutes and so adorables but he's not like, karen or izu. the hair is also kind of a challenge, namely his hair after he got a haircut.

the character i think is easiest to draw is ryuu. definitely. i've seen people say hatsutori is deceptively difficult to draw. i agree... even though i feel like by some miracle i understood how to draw him much better than others, he's REALLY hard!!!

the funny thing is, recently the last ryuu i draw, i said "i looked at a ref for once"? well its cause i usually ref my own art. usually it's fine. for ryuu who is easy for me to parse it's usually fine, but i realized recently the bangs were wrong the entire time, so i wanted to try being on model at least once (whether or not i apply it correctly next time is a big "maybe"). also i always draw the bunny ears too short, but that's usually something i am very conscious of (because it is a moe point that i hate that i neglect. MOE IS KING)

of course you'd think... well you draw miwa almost every day... you must be proficient in that? the answer is NO. in fact, he's the only character i am pulling up a picture from the actual game to draw almost every time. CONSISTENTLY. dita's look is easy enough to understand i guess, but the usual look, what's with those bangs?!?!?!!! WHY? i draw his bangs too long, but honestly that's not something i'm interested in rectifying. if anything, i've literally never seen anyone draw him 1:1 to the one picture we have, i feel like everyone struggles. genuinely have not seen any two artists draw him the same. so i am not worried about trying to be "on model". it's his fault for having such a weird wig in the first place. i mean, look, im gonna put it under a readmore and i genuinely want to know if you guys think it's fucked or not. i think it is. usually i have like, the one canon picture we have right, and then 3 of my drawings to ref how i did it, it's a struggle every time. but he's too funny. a character who haunts the interlude and doesn't have a single line in it, only ever talked in the one com report. so i keep drawing him because there's so many jokes to make at his expense. it's very cursed. i think having this blog made me a little obsessed.

for the dita look like i said in another post there's a lot of inconsistencies so i just take what i like. though for the most part i follow the design in the interlude. there's not much to comment about, aside from how i'm wondering where his ahoge is actually placed on his head. i just decide on the fly because i can't tell. it's not consistent between appearances. i won't talk about the scarf i'll start foaming at the mouth im not kidding

not even going into the characters i find near impossible like theodore. i'll cry. i'll be here all day. haruki is hard to draw too...

anyway, here's your serving of miwa's fucked up wig that haunt my nightmares every day because i hate drawing this hair so much:

i hope he DIES in com for this, is he stupid?

i hope everyone finds out he's 60+ years old and he has to hold a press conference apologizing for lying about being a recent ex-teenager

1 note · View note

unwellcryptid · 3 months

Text

hi. im an artist who isnt really an artist so much as a guy who happens to draw.

i also have a myriad of illnesses and conditions that fuck with my ability to do that, or to enjoy it.

ive been having a very difficult time making anything i wanna make recently. i say recently, but it wasnt that recent honestly- back in, what, 2020 or 2021, i developed a repetitive strain injury in both my arms, afflicting the muscles responsible for closing my hands and the down motion- both things you kinda need to do when you draw.

i should clarify that i didnt develop this because i was drawing excessively- i cant say ive ever drawn excessively, i dont think im capable quite honestly- but because of how i held myself at all times all the time for basically my entire life.

the RSI (abbreviated for repetitive strain injury because thats A Lot To Type) is responsible for my chronic pain. i hear some people can recover totally from an RSI, but alas i am not one of them.

i started drawing in 2016, and i had decided very strictly to draw Something every single day due to instruction from the artists i learned from, and i had largely done that.

but part of my (attempted) recovery from my RSI was not being able to draw. i knew, before it even began, that if i stopped drawing for very long, i would have an extremely hard time picking it back up.

(this had happened before, in smaller ways. if i didn't draw for a week or two, drawing was a major struggle and i enjoyed it way less, so i didnt draw as much. i almost had to force myself to draw just so i could build a pattern to enjoy it again. the RSI recovery was worse, i wouldnt be able to do anything for months, even if i wanted to.)

and as i predicted, when i stopped drawing for that long, i found it nearly impossible to pick drawing back up. this struggle has continued to this day- ive never been able to draw every day anymore- not helped by the fact the RSI never went away, so drawing can be physically painful if im not careful- but it isnt ONLY the RSI messing me up.

i realized i formed a very strained relationship to creating drawings itself.

its kind of hard to talk about, because i feel totally alone in having this problem. every artist ive ever known or even heard of has all said the same thing, that making art is part of who they are. theyve been doing it naturally, even if they havent been drawing since childhood, its still an easy and simple thing for them to do. most talk about how art got them through depressive episodes and bad parts of life, or how it helps them work through their emotions, or how its part of them recovering energy after a long day.

its none of those to me. drawing has always been a strain, a second step i take in my creativity that i work very, very hard to do. it takes energy, it causes pain, and usually it didnt help me with my emotions. that was never the point of me drawing.

i suspect the reasons why im struggling with art are complex and varied and i feel like its almost impossible to talk about with artists. they never get it, especially not professionals, especially not healthy ones.

so i guess i made a tumblr blog about it. because i wanna talk about it, and the best i can do is make my own space for it.

im not gunna post art here, but the plan is to post about art, and about how i'm handling it, about why i'm feeling this way, and how i'm doing with it day-to-day. i think that might help

#chronic pain #i dont. really wanna post this in too many tags. i kinda dont wanna be seen too much

0 notes

transcendence-through-exposure · 11 months

Text

Hello and welcome to my page (If anyone does see this) i want to start with an introduction.

let's just say my name is D and with alot of years of battling my own demons, I've finally have an understanding with them to live in balance with myself. i would delete all the posts I shared but after looking at them i realized how depressed i really was growing up. It's a place in my mind i had forgotten about until recently and has been building up for some time now, so I've come here to share.

For some reason it's a trigger to be asked if I'm okay. I can't fully say im happy, but im at a point where i just can't feel emotions like i used to. I tried the whole emotion thing after being numb for so long... And so far it's only caused problems. for example, I've recently opened myself to have new friends ( because I've only ever hung out with the same group of friends since i was a child.)

Lets say i work with music not gonna be too specific but i ended up working with a fundraising group who i will not name and discovered the world of sober bars. I don't wanna say i had a problem with alcohol or drugs but i realized what i had been doing to myself but that's another story i will share, I'm currently 5 years off drugs and 3 years no alcohol or soda (nothing too hardcore) just liked to party when i was younger guess it was a coping mechanism for me and when someone close passed i went down a spiral it was the only thing that kept me numb. I used to love that numb feeling and the flavor of alcohol.. i miss it sometimes but im definitely a better person without it. growing up i was always around alcohol, drugs, and gang members. Back in the day it wasn't entirely safe in my neighborhood but im getting off subject again so i will definitely write about that in a later blog.

Back to what i was talking about long story short i let people into my circle and i guess for some reason i have this tendency to wanna help people when i have nothing to give a quote i always remember is " never pour from an empty cup" and i like to say " im not a cup. I'm the person who guides the water to the cup." Meaning im here to build you up, a way to turn the flow to fill up the cups of others. I don't know if I'll ever have a true happiness. again, it's a trigger and truly makes me cry sometimes even though im usually really good with not feeling anything.

Kinda why i started my career in music. It was a new version of me that i chose in my pursuit of happiness. I can honestly say if it wasn't for music i wouldn't be here right now. it's better than any drug or alcohol and gave the feeling of pure serenity. I want to show people that there's a world that cares for you even when there's no one around. When you need that conversation but dont have anyone to talk to. It's crazy to think that a total stanger can talk through this beautiful art to your soul and be able to heal from it.

I think that's enough for tonight it's about 3AM and started this on the beach (where i usually go to throw all my negative thoughts). I'm tired, ive been more tired than usually recently but i don't let it stop me from getting things done most of the time i dont want to. but i always push myself to get it done. Growing up depressed i learned to cope with it so i really dont feel emotions as hard as I used to

ps. Im not sad or happy im just good enough to get through everyday knowing that we're all destined for greatness, I'm more at peace with myself and understand my feelings. Im self centered, in balance with my thoughts and emotions. hope i can help others whether it be a story, music or personal poetry.

Ok now im done, Thank you so much for reading, hope to see you again peace and love ☯️ .

#blog #poetry #writing #biography #self help #emotions #explore #discover #higher self

0 notes

noritoshiikamo · 3 years

Text

this is how you fall in love

pairing: kuroo tetsuroo + fem!oc genre: friends into lovers fluff with slight suggestive end tags//warning: nothing major // slight suggestive at the end if you squint enough note: the obligatory trio of mine: not well edited, lowercase intended, english isnt my first language im sorry if i murder it. o wow look ive been posting back to back, ive been writing nonstop lately watch me ghost my stories in few weeks guys my brain = rotting, plus lately ive been feeling emotionally abuseddrained so i need something fluffy

listen to this is how you fall in love by jeremy zucker + chelsea cutler for maximum feels

“you’re a lifesaver.”

kuroo huffed, eyes rolling back with a small laugh as he unlaced his sneakers and slipped the room slipper on. it was odd to see the gymnasium without any nets or balls sprawled around. the gym has been closed for a week now in preparation for the upcoming open school event and currently under the art club’s jurisdiction. under her jurisdiction with her canvases and paints and it pained him to see her ruining his sacred place. he carried two plastic bags and holding two boba teas in the same hand. he wasn’t sure which one she was more excited for; the boba, the paints she made him ran to an art supply shop or him. she reached out, the bobas in his hand exchanged as she settled it on the floor, and she squealed at the sight of the plastic bag. he frowned.

yup, not him.

tins of different colors of paint that she ran out mid painting that she forgot to buy had her dialing his number and now it’s all here. all thanks to kuroo tetsuro. she grimaced at the price tags; it was costly than her usual one. usually, she would’ve gotten her supplies online, but desperate measure calls for desperate solution. she could always claim her expenses with the club. typical kuroo, she huffed. he always preached about getting the best, not minding the price tags but she’ll be the victim of his nonstop complaining that he’s getting broke every single day. she tucked a stray hair back and mentally counted how much she owed the man as she arranged the tins on the table.

kuroo noticed that look; same look she had when they are in the math class and he clicked his tongue, “tch, you’re not paying.”

“i’m reimbursing you with the club money,” she shook her head and reached for her bag, “please kuroo, it’s so expensive.”

he reached for her wrist and she dropped the tote bag as he invaded her space. kuroo rested the palm of her hand right above his heart, his own around the waist and another under her chin as he tilted her chin up. his heartbeat was erratic, and she flushed. “it’s okay,” he said, softly. her lips formed into a small pout and he fought the urge to just kiss her.

their dynamic is something even kenma couldn’t figure it out.

they weren’t exactly dating. they are friends, close friends, and classmates. it has always been him, her and occasionally yaku; creating the chaotic duo/trio of class 5. they both played volleyballs, both captains while he’s the middle blocker, she’s their female team’s setter. they knew a lot of each other’s friends from other schools; he was the reason why she dated akaashi keiji from the first place. it was selfish of kuroo to admit to bokuto a month after they started dating that he disliked the idea of them together. typical kuroo is no longer snarky, he felt lost, felt like he was losing his other half. so, he confided to his close friend, the simpleton ace.

“you didn’t make any moves, kuroo, you can’t blame them.”

bokuto noted as them both stared at the two setters, playing around the fallen cherry blossoms. bokuto never seen akaashi smiled that much and kuroo could only wished that she smiled the same way to him. kuroo stared at the half bitten onigiri he’d been holding, suddenly every bite he took tasted bitter. every trace of akaashi on her gave him bitter taste. she liked wearing akaashi’s jersey; kuroo longed to see her in his own numbered jersey; she’s his number one after all. her own jersey number is as same as akaashi. it’s not like kuroo could hate anything he did; he treated her well. akaashi was a perfect boyfriend and everyone knew. that’s why kuroo hates him; he gave him no reason to hate the dude. it didn’t last long however, they drifted apart 6 months later, sending her to kuroo’s doorstep soaked in rain.

he stared at her soaked figure with no thoughts in mind.

“he dumped me,” she said, voice hoarse and shivering.

he was alone and was about to leave for kenma’s, but he couldn’t leave her alone. dropping his keys on the small table by the door, he threw his jacket back in the closet. “come in,” he whispered, pulling her figure in. dropping her bag on the floor, she clutched on his sleeves as she kicked off her soaking shoes. “i’m sorry, my mom isn’t home and i can’t find my keys,” she was a blabbering mess and he hushed her. he left her for a few minutes, coming back with a steaming towel and a clean shirt and pants. “it’s from the dryer. you can borrow my sister’s clothes,” grabbing her hands, they ran upstairs where he took her to the bathroom. she was too quiet, so he called her name. when she looked up to him, her eyes were red. she was no longer crying, more confused and upset. her cheeks flushed and he could see her teeth chattering. he wished nothing but to throw his fist at the man. finally, he got a reason to square up the stoic man; he always hates the way nothing could riled up akaashi.

“he’s stupid for doing you like this.”

she shook her head, “it’s nobody’s fault.”

“then stop blaming yourself,” he ruffled her hair, a small smile appeared from the corner of her lips as she watched him disappeared closing the door behind him. he left her with the hot water running, urgently grabbing the mop and bucket from the kitchen, and wiping the trail of her soaked feet has left before it could ruin the wooden floor.

cant come over, busy, ill tell u later

kuroo texted kenma. the pudding head left him on read.

they spend the night together, sitting on the floor with pillows pilling against the end of the bed as they sat in arms. he had his tv opened to one of the late-night game show. they sat in silence, her head rested on his shoulder and her lips pressed into a tiny line. at the corner of his eyes, he could see her phone’s notifications blaring despite being on mute. the number isn’t saved but it was familiar. she deleted his number already, probably out of rage, but it’s a good step.

tell me where you want me to drop your stuff im sorry i hope youre okay y/n? i heard it was storming did you make it back home? give me a call im calling you okay?

just as like what the message stated, the unknown number called her. it startled her which startled him too. she stared down on the screen, he noticed the grip on the phone and wondered how the phone did not break yet. “can you answer it for me?” she said, holding the phone out to the black-haired man. shocked, he took the phone and pressed the green button. he pressed the phone to his ear and heard her name being called.

“hey man,” kuroo cleared his throat, “listen-”

“she’s with you?” the voice- akaashi asked.

looking down on the girl who was pretending to not have any interest in the call at all, eyes focused on the gameshow, kuroo sighed.

“she is. listen, i think you should leave her alone.”

“kuroo, i know about your feelings. for her. bokuto-san told me about it. if you think that this is the proper way to get her when she’s vulne-”

kuroo bit the inside of his cheeks. he was offended that akaashi dared to call him out like that. “so, what? she made her pick,” the girl turned to face him, brows up wondering what they are talking about.

“that’s low, even for you, kuroo-san.”

their eyes met. he didn’t even realize how deep the cut on his palm where he had balled his fingers into a fist until she touched it. he calmed down. “you hurt her. you have no right to say what’s low or not. be a bigger man, leave her alone,” he muttered flatly, before ending the call. they didn’t break eye contact until he realized what he had done.

“i-i shouldn’t have done that.”

she shook her head, “stop blaming yourself,” a small smile on her face.

that was 3 months ago.

kuroo had made moving on easy for her. akaashi and her remained friendly, although kuroo noticed that she tended to avoid him when possible. the breakup was indeed mutual, but merely on the fact that he lost feelings. akaashi had fallen out of love with her and in love with some other girl but who was she to judge when she was falling in love with the rooster head in silence. they still hang out with bokuto and akaashi but rarely with the latter.

she made him apologized to the fukurodani’s setter too and they remained on friendly term, still practiced together whenever they have training camps together where akaashi had admitted one training night that kuroo and her looks better together. kuroo didn’t say anything, not that he knew what to reply to that (his mind scream fuck yeah we do) but shrugged at his statement. “i guess dating her made you less pain in the ass, kuroo-san,” akaashi joked as they resumed the game.

kuroo was pulled back to reality when he felt his lips brushed against something. his eyes widened when he realized what it was. a quick kiss from her. he blinked frantically, trying to comprehend what had just happened which caused the girl to laugh. “did you just?” he asked confused by what had just happened which she nodded. she bit her bottom lip to hold herself from bursting into a laugh. “god, you should see your face. it’s so stupid. and every girl called you the playboy captain huh?”

he huffed and rolled his eyes, “i am not. i’ve been loyal to one girl for many years now, she is the one who hasn’t notice me at all,” he faked his pout, refused to look her directly in the eyes, praying that she wouldn’t notice his reddening cheeks.

“she must’ve been so stupid,” she teased, her nose rubbing gently against his jawline as she rested her figure against his closer. his chin rested against her head.

“she is,” he looked down on her, his arms around her waist tighter, “i don’t think she knows this but if she leaves me, i think i’ll be so broken inside. is it selfish to say that?” a small frown appeared on her face.

“i don’t think she ever talked about leaving you.”

a grin grew on his face, “so you know who i’m talking about huh?” she fell into his trap. she rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out, calling him stupid. he studied her face, his grin softened into what yaku and his volleyball team called the kuroo is stupidly in love with y/n but refused to admit face. his fingers ran into her hair which she had been growing out in few months down to her shoulder because she thinks that he likes her better that way. the way she tried to subtly put on make up to look better that the other girls who’s shamelessly flirting with him. she was too stupid to realize that he had loved her beyond that.

he loves the rough pads on her hands from holding her paintbrushes and volleyball. he loves that she works hard for everything she’s doing be it studying, volleyball or arts, she would put her blood, sweat and tears into it. he loves that she would wait for him to buy lunch so they can eat together in class. he would buy her a box of milk which she insisted that she doesn’t need too; but he convinced it would be good for her. he wants the best for her.

he loves that all the missing clothes he’s complaining about is in the back of her closet or on her. his cream hoodie hanging behind her closet door, his random pile of t-shirts in a basket on the floor of her closet that he liked to left beside the mix pile of her shoes and his one big ass nike shoes. her room isn’t messy, it is because she kept the messiness in her closet. she also like to keep random stuff of him too. the one medal he won from a science fair hung on the headboard of her bed, the misshapen looking hand wax sculpture of their hands intertwined from a funfair where she rested a purikura of them on it and a lucky bamboo plant he gave on her birthday to compromise on the no gift rule.

“for luck,” he grinned.

unlike hers, he kept her item neatly in his drawer. your spare shirts that he borrowed and refused to return, extra towel and her toiletries, some of her drawing blocks and a small cat shaped pouch where she kept her allergies medication. mostly hidden because his annoying friends come over often and would accidentally talk about it in front of his grandparents. but, on his bedside table, he has a cup of pencils by the bed where he collected the art supplies she left behind, random markers and paintbrushes, a clay sculpture of a trinket plate she made from art club (she carved a tiny letter k in the corner beside the obvious looking genitalia drawing) and a fake plant which she was sure he will not be able to kill it.

he loves it when she wore his jersey. he lost his mind when he found out that her current season number is the same as his. he’s in love. the first time he saw her in his jersey, the number one jersey on her body was during their training. he lost concentration; mouth hung a bit. he got so flustered that he let lev served the ball straight to his head. usually, lev would be dead by now, but he doesn’t mind. his nose bled but to see her kneel beside him, clutching on his own shirt screaming how stupid he is, wiping the blood away with towel, he could only say how pretty she looked. all his teammates were startled, her included. she clutched on his collar angrily; her knees stung from when she leaped down to his side, but this idiot could only smile at her with a bloody nose. “you are fucking idiot,” she cried out angrily, pushing him away before throwing the towel on his face leaving the pleased third year laying on the floor.

he loves the way she would find a way to impress him, be it as ridiculous as the halloween costume idea she had where they’ll go as the front and end of a horse or as serious as the submitted college application to the same university he had gotten into. “you are not getting rid of me that easily, tetsu,” the evil look on her face as she clicked the submit button send shivers down his spine.

“if you leave, i think i’ll cry,” he confessed, his smile slowly died.

“kuroo tetsuro is going to cry after me?” she teased. he nodded eagerly. “does kuroo tetsuro realized that we are literally moving into the same university? i couldn’t catch a break from him,” she faked her annoyance which he playfully avenged by sending her on the floor laughing as he tickled her. tears trickled down her cheeks as she begged him to stop, screaming to get away from his grip. “please, kuroo, i’m going to pee if you don’t stop!” he obliged, tears prickled the corner of his own eyes from laughing too much. straddling her waist, he gathered her wrists in one hand over her head. “apologize and said that kuroo tetsuro is the best man in your life or i swear i’ll make you pee,” he threatened her playfully, wiggling the fingers of his free hand close to her waist. her eyes widened in fears.

“that’s not fair!”

“apologize first.”

“fine!” she pouted, “i’m sorry, i won’t make fun of you again. now get off me!”

he raised his eyebrow, “andddd?”

“annddd-” a teasing smile appeared on her face as she said the next 5 words that send him to mars and back; “i love you kuroo tetsuro.”

he froze in shock. he heard the words before but never in this way; never for him.

finally, i think i got the calculation, love you yaku! lev you’re adorable but so stupid, i love it! thank you for letting me borrow your game, kenma. you’re the best, love ya!

the grip on her wrists loosened. taking advantage of his shock state, she pushed him back, straddling him by the waist, pinning his own hands above his head, giving him the taste of his own medicine. “i’m not going to leave your sorry ass, tetsu. i hope you don’t regret it,” she leaned down, capturing his lips with a longer kiss. letting go of his wrist, her hand went immediately into his rooster hair while another cupped his cheek, deepening their kiss. she could feel his cold palm resting against her bare waist and she shuddered. between the kisses, he heard her whispering his name. “kuroo, do you love me too?” she asked so innocently with kisses between the words but the way she grabbed a handful of his hand in a fist felt so dirty, eliciting a strangled moan from the back of his throat. she pulled back, staring down on his eyes as his lips moved.

“i love you too.”

nothing in his hazel eye but sincerity. he groaned when she pulled herself out of his reach, missing her warm body as she laughed. straightening her sweater back, pulling her hair back up into a tighter ponytail before she picked up the paintbrush she dropped. the paintbrush left a white stain on the court. as if kuroo wasn’t here, whimpering underneath her a minute ago, she continued her work. “i need to finish the mural by this week and you’re not exactly helping me,” she warned him, pointing the wet brush his direction. through the corner of her eyes, he was propped on his elbows, still staring at her, causing her to blush profusely. it annoyed him that she would tease him, then leaving him high and dry. before she could crack open the new paint tin, he ignored her warning as he tackled her back into his arms.

breathless against her lips, he told her to continue later. the urgency and rawness of his voice made her putty immediately. looking up the man, she pouted her lips.

“kuroo-san,” she whined as he captured her bottom lips.

he elicited a soft moan from the girl. he grinned against her lips. a hand rested firmly beside her head while another snaked under the sweater. there will be bruise tomorrow, she was sure of it, he will make sure of it.

“it will be quick, baby. i promise.”

she has no objection.

#kuroo tetsuro #kuroo tetsurou #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo tetsuro imagine #haikyuu x reader #hq #haikyuu #kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsuro fluff #haikyuu x y/n #kuroo tetsurou x reader #writing: hq #writing: fics

133 notes · View notes

anony-mouse-writer · 3 years

Text

well if netflix is allowed to give us a crappy washed out edgelord version of winx, then im allowed to post my weird worldbuilding takes on winx club that ive been making for the last year and a half since i rewatched the show. (also i watched the 4kids version so apologies about the names)

general worldbuilding: the three schools of magix are there to train the defenders of the realms.

red fountain trains paladins and knights to protect the kingdoms and their people.

alfea trains magic users to protect the magic of the realms with a concentration on personal transformation and growth.

cloud tower trains magic users to protect the realms themsleves with a concentration on study and magical artificery. because of the rogue witches who tried to steal the dragonfire, there has been a certain amount of tension between the witches and everyone else for a few decades.

bloom: is slightly... odd growing up. sometimes her eyes glow and her base temp is a few degrees higher than is strictly healthy and she is drawn to warm spaces like lizards or cats. her mom invests in a greenhouse extension for her flowershop and no one comments on the hammock bloom strings up to sleep in. she says she’s never picked any major or job in the future because she’s okay where she is at the flower shop, but really its because she feels like shes missing something important and can’t figure it out. it doesn’t go away completely when she gets alfea either, but when she finally gets to sparks/domino, she realizes its because she is carrying the embodiment of an entire realm’s magic in her and that kinda messes up your magic a bit.

stella: solaria has several branches of royalty, but they are mainly split into the three solar courts and the lunar and stellar courts. her father is the king of the first solar courts and her mother is the queen of the lunar court. after their divorce, stella spent far more time dealing with courtly intrigue than she did practicing magic and she ends up getting held back a year at alfea due to missing several fundamental lessons. she tends to be more concerned with official standing and presentation than power or magics, but her alfea/red fountain friends are helping to teach her how normal non-manipulative friendships work.

shes sort of friends with prince skye and squire brandon and when they were kids they came up with a half-cocked plan where she married skye and dated brandon in secret and skye could fall in love with whoever he wanted and then they would be stella’s attendent so it was all covert. it was not a great plan, but it did involve several awkward third-wheeling dates on skye’s behalf and he has so much friendly blackmail in the two of them.

tecna: tecna comes from a planet where instinctual magic is a dying art. if anything, most magic users end up at cloud tower to study artificery, but tecna is determined to learn about raw magic and its applications in magi-tech. magi-tech is different from artificery because artifacts are meant to be used by magic users usually for magical or combative purposes whereas magi-tech is mean to be used by anyone for everyday applications (ie scanners, holograms, etc)

tecna’s species dosn’t have innate genders, but instead pick their gender presentations as they grow older (if at all). tecna picks female so she can attend alfea, but eventually realizes that female feels right and starts to wear less androgynous outfits on ocassion.

musa: musa’s mom used classical instruments (chinese classical, not western) and her dad used a lot more contemporary styles and tools, but together, they produced beautiful music. when her mom died, her dad grew to resent the classical instruments that reminded him of her and musa grew up with only contemporary influences. musa meets galitea (the other fairy from harmonix) in her second year of school and they have long discussions (and eventually jam sessions about musa’s inexperience with any classical or traditional instruments. musa starts to learn the flute and a few of the instruments her mom left her in secret and only tells her dad about it during the concert where she performs with them for the first time. she goes on to make fusion classical/contemporary music.

musa still has an arc with riven, but after season 1 when they break up, she spends season 2 out of any romantic relationships and season 3 realizes she has feelings for galitea. im still not sure if i want her coming to terms with her bisexuality to be tied to her coming to terms with classical music or not.

flora: floras people can talk to plants. this makes eating plants awkward. ergo, floras people are obligate carnivores who also gain energy via photosynthesis. flora is a scientist first and foremost. she studies and wants to develop new ways for plants to thrive in foreign environments without becoming invasive species and is working with both magi-tech and pure magic to find ways for people to get the most out of plants for various medicinal and magical purposes without causing any harm to the plants.

she also works on humanoid-floral communications and spends a lot of time with pumpkin-mytra and later human-myrta learning to break curses which was not her original plan but it was Very Important and so she learned it and ten it was kinda fun so she stuck with it.

layla/aisha: her parents traditional views and ideas are important to them and to ruling tides. aisha has little choice but to accept them and has no outlet for her true self for a long time, leading to some heavy suppression and anxiety. when she gets to meet the pixies, she makes friends for the first time and they teach her a bit about being herself. she still has struggles with expressing her true feelings and swings between respecting her kingdom’s traditions and resenting them for making her be someone she’s not for so long. as she develops as a person and a fairy, she learns eventually to reconcile the two in a way that might not please her parents entirely, but allows for growth and tradition both. she gets along weirdly well with stella who helps her on this journey a lot.

aisha also spends time with fairies and red fountainers (and later possibly even some witches) coming up with better communication lines and various protections for magical creatures who don’t necessarily have specific realms (ie the pixies) since they lack any kind of protection from larger threats besides their own.

other characters:

daphne is a from the fairy school of magic so her job was to protect the magic of sparks/domino when the rogue witches attacked, so she stuffed it (aka the dragonfire) into the crown princess and hid her on a null planet so the coven couldnt find it.

myrta not only moves from the witches school of magics to the fairy school of magics, but she is trans. she gets an arc where flora and later helia help her to figure out her powers and also how to be comfortable as her own person outside of her friendships with lucy or even flora.

riven is a good fighter but a better mage. he wants to best his peers in fighting, and hates that he feels he call of magic pretty strongly. darcy takes advantage of this and encourages him to abandon his magic while draining him of his power. when he is chased from cloud tower and falls, he uses his skills in tandem with a bit of magic to survive. he remains wary of his powers, but eventually learns to accept them and learns to be a mage and a fighter which is Simply Not Done, but honestly at this point riven is done listening to everyone else so he does what he wants and becomes great at both.

the trix spend season one pretending to be regular witches. they play up the ‘mean girls’ routine and spend a lot of time stirring chaos and malcontent at cloud tower. when they finally give up the pretense and try to take the dragon fire for real, they lose a bit of the mean girls vibe and work towards the rogue witch coven’s goal of stealing the magic of various realms. their work in cloud tower does not dissapear and there is a time where a lot of witches have to unlearn a lot of toxic behavior and it sucks a lot.

#winx #winx club #worldbuilding #this all has been living in my head for A G E S #alfea #writing #op #mouse’s life

81 notes · View notes

wiltking · 2 years

Note

hello wilt i hope you are well, feel free to ignore this idk if it’ll make sense but. ive been wanting to learn russian for a long time now. my mothers side of the family all speak it and i was the first of the family to be born in an english speaking country with that as my only language. my mother used to speak russian to me as a child but that’s about it and ive retained very little of it. ive always wanted to feel more connected to that part of me and to my family, but ive lost contact with a lot of them for being trans and my relationship with those who remain in my life feels rocky at best. i feel i have little reason left to learn the language as it does not feel like it is one that wants me speaking it. i realise that sounds silly, but that’s the only way i can put it. i have trouble learning it without feeling guilty about the fact that i never could before, speaking what little i can feels like i am speaking with my mother’s words and not my own. like i am trying too hard. i so badly want to make it belong to me, but i don’t feel deserving of it. i know it would bring me joy to read and write and speak, it always does when i try. but i always give up, because i feel like im faking this side of myself because i can no longer be as close to my family as i used to be. but when you post about learning russian, it brings me some hope that i can do that too. it was mostly your art that helped me feel proud of being a trans man, and of loving men. i think you are helping me want to be prouder of this side of myself too. i hope to learn russian for myself and make it feel like home someday, you really do encourage me, so thank you for everything you do. i wonder if youve ever felt similar or if this makes any sense at all, but regardless, thank you

hi, i have no idea how you managed to send an ask this long but i'm going to reply under a readmore because i also have a lot to say!

so i actually relate to a few parts of your message. i was also the very first of my entire family to be born in an english speaking country. and while both sides of my family are russian and still speak a lot of russian to this day, my parents prioritized me and my siblings to focus on english growing up. so i didn't have a strong starting point either, made even worse by the fact that during my teen years to my early 20s i genuinely tried to forget russian after i became very ostracized from my family for being trans. i tried to cut it out of my life entirely and distance myself from it because i thought my family's rejection would hurt less that way.

"i feel i have little reason left to learn the language as it does not feel like it is one that wants me speaking it." i relate to this especially hard. i felt that if my own family couldn't love me or want me, why would the language as a whole? the culture? the history? but at a certain point i had to admit to myself that i felt extremely adrift. and i had to tell myself that a language itself can not hurt me, it's only those who speak it who wield that power. and they can do that in any language.

so for me my breaking point resulted from a number of factors. i wont get into it all rn but what it all boils down to is that i was and still am frustrated by the extreme conservative views that caused my family to reject me. thankfully, i live in a country that can't be reached by russia's anti-lgbt laws. which means i have the ability to make art and stories that are both lgbt and russian and No One can stop me. when i realized that--and started making art that merges those two worlds (my gay astronaut paintings, HYMN, ect+)--i realized that yes i do want to make this my focus in life. to show myself that it's possible to be both things. that it's good to be both things. that there's freedom and healing in merging both things. i'm still learning that and working through it. but it's a lot more fulfilling than i ever dreamed it could be. and i'm still just getting started!

it was really hard at first. it's still hard. but making the experience as enjoyable as possible to me helps a lot, and i do that by listening to a ton of russian music, following other russian lgbt artists, making gay pathologic art (!!), reading gay/trans russian fanfiction (!!!!!! i was SO extremely proud that i was able to do that for the first time this summer. it's such a small thing but it was huge for me), and working on my own gay russian projects.

so i really hope that you too can find a personal reason to hold onto and remind yourself of any time it starts to feel difficult. i was extremely hesitant about the concept of relearning russian in the beginning and i didn't even make a full decision about it until this year. and i am stubbornly doing it at my own damn pace.

taking it one day at a time is more than enough if that's all you can manage right now. wishing you all the best and you're always welcome to talk russian stuff with me or just simply exchange media recs, learning tips, etc. if you want to.

and thank you so much for your message, it lifts a huge weight off my shoulders to know someone else out there has gone through / is going through something similar. best wishes.

#sorry to post this essay on everyone's dash but this stuff is super important to meeee <3 #long post #we lgbt russians are OUT HERE

5 notes · View notes

mca-attack21 · 4 years

Text

Mystery Bullet Part 3

This is the third and final part to this series, thanks for joining me on the ride! Part 1: Here Part 2: Here

The phone rung a couple of times before Sherlock answered. “Awh John, you’re missing the fun.”

“She’s okay, just had a bad reaction to the antigens in the blood they gave her during surgery.”

“Did they give her the wrong blood?”

“They claim they didn’t, but that is the only thing that makes sense.”

“Oh, that’s brilliant! The bullets weren’t made of ice, they were made of blood. That explains everything.”

“I’m not sure I follow,”

“Think about it the bullet disappeared. She had a bad reaction to antigens. Ice wasn’t dense enough, but the blood would be perfect. Someone used human blood to create a projectile that when froze with liquid nitrogen and shot by pressurized air would resemble a bullet. It wouldn’t leave an exit wound and would dissolve. It also explains why she said the wound site was cold.” Sherlock explained.

“She’s awake now, you should come and see her. She’s asked about you,” John replied.

“I’m glad she is okay, I will come to visit when I have solved the case” Sherlock replied.

“Sherlock, she is still in critical condition, you do understand that right?”

“The auction is tomorrow, we are running out of time,” Sherlock answered before hanging up.

John wanted to call him back, but he knew that it was no use. He instead went into your room and sent Molly home for the night. When you woke up he explained what had happened and Sherlock’s blood bullet theory.

“Have you found the paintings yet?” you asked.

“What do you mean?”

“The real paintings are still in the Museum somewhere. There is too much traffic, extra security, and outside security cameras for them to have been removed. None of the other security cameras were tampered with and no other guards were affected. It had to be an inside job because someone walked in and out of that well-lit room without drawing suspicion and left the same way. They had to be in there well before they actually shot the security guard. Between that and the looping footage, I would assume that the guard was in on the heist and then was double-crossed. Regardless, there is no possible way that the art was removed it is somewhere in that room. I called the art restorator that you met, he said that he would meet with me to check over the paintings. He wanted me to come in that night, but I told him it would have to wait. Oh my god, it was him!” you realized.

“How so?” John asked.

“He knew that I was on to him and he knew you and Sherlock wouldn’t be home. He had access to the facility and no one would question where he was going. He has worked at the gallery for a while and would have had plenty of time to plan everything out.” you explained.

John was laughing and pulling out his phone.

“What?” you asked.

“You are insane, that is what. I need to get normal friends,” he answered.

“Is everything okay?” Sherlock answered.

“Yes, but you need to go to the museum, I’ll meet you there.”

“Why?”

“Because Y/n solved the case and we need to go pick up the paintings and culprit. I’ll explain when we get there. Call Mycroft.” he said and hung up.

“Okay now, you are going to lay here and rest. No exceptions. Sherlock and I will come by when it’s over and we will see what we have to do to get you out of here. Is there anyone you’d like me to call?” he asked.

“Nope, I think I’ll take a nap. Be careful,” you answered.

Sherlock and John went to the museum. It didn’t take them long to discover where the real paintings were being hidden. They then went to Dr. Argonza’s office, to no one’s surprise he wasn’t there. They did find a cryogenic dewar which could have easily been used to store the blood bullets. There was an airbrush and pipe that Sherlock was sure could provide enough velocity to cause the injuries. The entire rig would easily fit under a coat and be hidden. Sherlock filled his brother in and together they came up with a plan to switch the duplicates back with the originals and wait for Dr. Argonza at the auction where they would pick him up.

Convinced that not even Mycroft’s men could screw this up, John and Sherlock prepared to leave. John had them stop by the flat to pick you up some spare clothes for your return trip. He was surprised to see that Sherlock had cleaned up the blood and everything from his experiments earlier that day. He was glad that this was almost over and that things would soon be back to normal.

When they arrived at the hospital they were told visitation hours were over and made some type of excuse using their “badges” to get passed the nurse. John led the way to your room and Sherlock followed. They were surprised to hear talking from your room. That surprised turned to concern when they realized that your door was locked.

Meanwhile:

You were tired and understandably so. But how were you supposed to get any sleep when nurses were constantly coming in and poking and prodding you. This nurse was different, you hadn’t seen him yet. He came over and prepared to inject another medication into your IV.

“I had my last round of medication an hour ago,” you spoke confused.

“This is a post-op Antibiotic, Doctors’ orders,” he said nonchalantly.

“Which one?” you asked painfully forcing yourself to sit up to get a better look.

“Carbenicillin? That can’t be right. I have a severe reaction to Beta Lactums.” you explained.

“Hmm, it doesn’t say that in your chart,” he replied before injecting it in.

You immediately tore out your IV and tried to hit the Nurse call button, shouting for help.

“Shut up! Shut up!” he shouted coming over and placing his hand over your nose and mouth forcefully. You tried to fight against him but your body was too weak and the fear was taking over.

“If you would have just stayed out of it, none of this would have happened. I didn’t want to kill you, but you’re too much of a liability now,” he explained.

You were beyond scared now tears running down your cheeks. You fought against it with everything you had but it was too much. The burning in your chest took over and the black circles grew.

That is when Sherlock and John burst through the door. Sherlock ripped Dr. Argonza off of you and threw him on the ground. You gasped and struggled to breathe. John had him at gunpoint until security was able to collect him. Even then, he waited with him until Mycroft showed up with his men to take him away. Back in your room, the nurses had kicked Sherlock out so they could thoroughly check you over. You were understandably a mess and demanded AMA forms. You gave them no choice and fought through the pain to remove all of the monitors that were hooked up to you. You sat up sheepishly and started putting on the clothes that John had brought. The nurses tried to reason with you, but you weren’t having it. That is when one of them decided to let Sherlock in to see if he could talk any sense into you.

“What is it that you think you are doing?” he asked concerned.

“I’m leaving. Are you going to help me?” you replied clutching your head.

“Y/n, you can’t leave. You need to stay here and let them take care of you, you’re in no condition to go home” he tried and then he saw something that shook him; you started crying.

“I can’t stay here, please don’t make me stay here” you cried.

He felt like he was entirely unequipped to handle this situation and wished that John was there.

“It’s okay Y/n, everything is going to be okay. Just lay back down.” he tried.

“I want to go home Sherlock, I’d rather die there than stay here,” you sobbed.

He went over to your side and did something that was very rare for Sherlock, he gave you a hug.

“I was so scared” you revealed.

“I know, I’m sorry. It’s over now,” he soothed.

“I can’t stay here, Sherlock,” you added.

“I know, we’ll figure it out. Just relax,” he whispered.

“I’m sorry,”

“You have nothing to be sorry for Y/n, just lay back down until John returns,” Sherlock instructed taking a seat next to you. It wasn’t long before you fell back asleep. And shortly after that both John and Mycroft walked in.

“What is all this?” John asked referring to you sleeping in your clothes and not being hooked up to the machines.

“She doesn’t want to stay here. She signed AMA’s and tried to leave.” Sherlock informed.

“Well she doesn’t get a choice, she needs to stay and be looked after,” John replied.

“You know, I have never seen her cry before today.” Sherlock whispered, “She literally said that she rather die at our flat than to stay here.”

“We can’t take care of her in this condition,” John reminded.

“Mycroft, do you think that I can cash in a favor?” Sherlock asked acknowledging his brothers’ presence for the first time.

“You are running low on those, what do you want this time?” Mycroft returned.

“The VIP suite here until Y/n can safely check out,” Sherlock replied still not taking his eyes off of your sleeping form.

“I’ll see what I can do,” he said as he exited the room.

“We almost lost her three times today John,” Sherlock realized.

“She’ll be okay though, and that’s what counts,” John reminded.

The next two days were spent in the VIP suite of the hospital. Sherlock refused to leave your side even though you told him it was okay. The Art Gallery covered the entirety of your medical expenses as compensation for you saving the auction. When you were finally allowed to go home, you were ordered to take it easy for a week. Sherlock refused to take any cases during that time, which was quite out of character. This mystery was one of the few which never made it on the blog, and that was okay.

#sherlock #sherlock holmes #sherlock bbc #sherlock benedict cumberbatch #sherlock imagine #sherlock imagines #sherlock series #sherlock x reader #sherlock x you #sherlock holmes imagine #sherlock holmes imagines #sherlock holmes x reader #sherlock holmes series #john watson #john watson imagine

389 notes · View notes

optimistic-dinosaur-nacho · 4 years

Text

Imprisoned - Chapter V

Chapter V

Story Rating: 14+ Warnings: Violence, Murder, Mentions of Murder, Language Summary: Y/N is Andy and Laurie Barber’s 14-year-old daughter who is a high-grade student in Archer Middle School. Her best friend, Alice Miller had been gone for a while. They search for the lost student and find out that Alice Miller’s body has the prints of Andy and Laurie Barber’s daughter, Y/N.

Author’s Note: Hopefully this turns out good

SPOILER ALERTS FOR DEFENDING JACOB

Go to ‘~~~’ if you’ve seen the preview. If you haven’t and you’ve been warned for spoilers you may start with the first sentence

Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X Chapter XI Chapter XII Chapter XIII

~~~

SPOILERS

Y/N walks down the stairs with her bag as she drops it at the end of the stairs to face her parents. She stared at them. Andy had the angered look that rarely appears on his face towards her.

She sees the worried look on her mother’s. “You wanna tell us what this is?” Andy asks. Y/N looks between the two and spotted the knife on the counter. The blade hid underneath it’s sheath.

“You were snooping in my room?” Y/N looks at her mom, assuming her mother would do that since she does that sometimes. “I was,” Andy snaps, “Not your mother. That’s not the point,” He says.

Y/N swallows and sighs, “I just got it, it’s not a big deal.”

Laurie leans forward shocked, “Not a big deal? Then why didn’t you tell us?” She asks. Y/N holds her hand out to the knife, “I only hid it because I know you guys would freak out.”

“You got that part right,” Andy nods with his arms crossed. “Did you buy it online?” Laurie asks. Y/N looks over to her, “No, I got it at the army-navy store in town. I paid for it. With my own money.” Laurie looks over to Andy and puts her hand on her hip.

“When was this?” Andy asked. “I don’t know. Couple months ago,” Y/N replies. Andy tried remember if she ever walked out of the house to go somewhere. Y/N does walk back home sometimes. He wouldn’t find the right day.

“Ever bring it to school?” He asked. Y/N diverts her eyes away from them and sighed. Andy doesn’t like when she does that. A teenager move. “Hey,” Andy says sternly, “Look at us.” Y/N doesn’t obey and distracts herself with Milo. “Y/N, listen to your father.”

“Y/N, look at me in the eye,” Andy said a bit more harshly. Y/N looks up and he saw the tears come to her eyes. “Just once, I showed it to some people,” She replies.

“Who?”

“Derek, Henry. I was just like, ‘Hey guys, check this out’.” Andy cranes his head back a little bit and his arms tighten across each other. Y/N quickly catches the falling tear and watches Milo reach Andy’s side and attempts to cut all the tension with his cuteness.

“Milo…” Laurie gently calls, the hound comes over. “Have you ever used it?” Andy continues, his voice more softer. Laurie didn’t like how he asked about it that way and puts her hand on the counter.

“Like for what?” Y/N asked.

“For whatever you use a knife for,” Andy says as if it was obvious. Y/N looks over to her mother who didn’t look at her so she turns back to her father. If Andy knew about the knife and began to snoop in her room, she knew he had to know about that post.

“You read Derek’s post, didn’t you?” Y/N asks.

“Why would he write that?” Laurie asked. Y/N shrugs, “Cause him and Henry are assholes. That’s why.”

“You didn’t answer my question. Have you ever used it?” Andy asks again.

“Like to stab somebody?” Her voice cracks, Andy’s jaw tenses up, “No. How could you even ask me that?” She takes a step back at his question.

“Because I have to. Because I have to know with absolute certainty that this–” Andy gestures to the blade, “–isn’t the knife they’re looking for.” Y/N doesn’t respond to him as the tears began to fall.

She hates to see him upset.

“Well?” He snaps.

“Andy, she just told you,” Laurie cuts in. Y/N takes another step back, “Can’t believe this… that you even think that about me,” She says.

Laurie became the concern mother again, “Of course we don’t-”

“Yeah, whatever,” Y/N wipes the streaks of tears from her cheeks. Andy regretted it. Y/N hated that he yelled. Andy hated that she cried. One of the worst things he could ever see.

Laurie comes over to her, “Hey, hey. Look, we believe every word you’ve said. We just wanna know why Derek or Henry would write what they wrote. We thought they were your friends.” Laurie and Andy knew those boys were her friends from the beginning. Those small gatherings. They saw Henry and Derek laugh with her and Alice.

They were more shocked.

“They are,” Y/N says, looking over to Andy but she looked away immediately. “It’s not a big deal,” She says. “Not a big deal?” Andy asked, knowing this assumption on social media is not a big deal.

“Y/N, they accused you of murder in a public forum.”

“No one means what they say on there,” Y/N says, “That’s what kids do, they just talk shit and they try to sound cool. That’s all it is,” She said.

Andy sighs, slightly turned to look at the knife and looked back. “So you’re not at all bothered by what they wrote?” He looks up to her, noticing she never even looked at him in the eyes. Him yelling really messed her up to look at him now.

“I mean… Yeah, I am, a little bit. They were just being dicks,” Y/N shakes her head, “No one takes it seriously. Honest,” She finally looks at him. Andy looks at his wife who did as well.

Y/N didn’t looked bothered by the comments. More likely bothered by this conversation. “Look, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the knife, okay?” She says, Andy looks at her. Y/N’s eyes still never looking at him, she lifts her hand up to the knife.

“Can I have it back now?”

“That’s not even remotely funny,” Laurie said, Y/N looks at her in disbelief. “I bought it, so it’s mine.”

“No. Not anymore.” Y/N looks at him as if he was serious. His stern look glared at her. Y/N shakes her head and grabs her bag. “I’m gonna be late for school.”

~~~

Last warning! DEFENDING JACOB SPOILERS

Enjoy!

“Well, I can drive you, if you wanna wait a few,” Laurie states, Y/N kneels down and pets Milo. “No, it’s fine, I’ll walk,” She says.

Andy turns his head away with a sigh, “What time will you be home?” Laurie asks. Y/N zips up her bag, “I don’t know. I might stay for art.” Y/N turns to Laurie as she holds her hand out.

“Come here,” Laurie takes her head and pulls her into a hug. She kisses her forehead, “I love you, okay?” Laurie said. Y/N looks up at her, nodding, “Love you, too.”

Andy turns his head, “Hey.” The two girls look over at him and he noticed her hand tense on her backpack strap. He sees the fear and sadness in her eyes as he looks up to her.

He shakes his head, “I shouldn’t have yelled.”

Y/N doesn’t respond and walks out the door leaving the couple there. Andy lets out a harsh tone, “God. Fucking Derek,” He slams his fist on the counter, “What kind of idiot writes that online?” Laurie walks over and rubs a hand down her face.

“So what do we do now?” She asked, looking down at the knife before them. “Do we need to report it?” She asks. Andy looks over to her, “No. God, no. What’s to report?” He asks back.

Laurie shrugs, “It’s just she’s been accused and we know about it. It’s not like the police aren’t going to find out anyway. It’s right there online.”

“It’s not a credible accusation. There’s no reason to bring the whole world on Y/N’s head. Trust me,” He lifts up his hand to at least give her the sign to calm down, “It’s better just to let this go.”

Laurie looks over to Milo who was sitting patiently, his head looking over the counter sniffing the blade. Andy pushes it further away from him. “What do we do with it?” Laurie asked.

Andy leans on the counter with one hand. “I don’t know. I’ll put it somewhere.”

“Are you sure?” She asked. Andy saw her eyes look up to him, “Honey, it’s not a crime to own a knife or to be a stupid teenager.” Andy takes the knife into his hands and sighed, “Thank God. We’d have to lock up half of ‘em.”

Laurie turns away and rubs her face again, eventually running her hand through her hair. Andy looks down at the knife. “I better get going. I’ll call or text you.”

“Okay,” She says.

After getting into his car, he pulls out and spots the garbage truck picking up their trash on the curb. He watches the truck and thought of the idea. Driving out of his driveway, he goes down the road a bit and stops in front of a house.

He stops his car and steps out, walking over to the trash bin and tossed the knife in the can, looking around as he headed back into his car. The sound of the garbage truck behind him stops to pick the next trash up as Andy drives off to work.

Y/N was in her math class, writing down notes from their text book as she read through them. In the corner of her eye, she sees the girls move in towards each other and whispered.

Y/N tried to ignore them but she became curious and nervous what they were talking about. She turns her head towards the girls and they immediately leaned away from each other.

Y/N diverts her eyes back to her book and sighed. “Did you see what he wrote?” The girl whispered. “Derek always talks shit,” The other one said back. “Did she actually-?” The two’s conversation was cut off by the bell and the students walked out of their classes.

Y/N walks through the halls and the comm dings. “Attention, please. This is a reminder to those students who have signed up to help the police search Cold Spring Park. We will be gathering in the lower gymnasium at 2:45 this afternoon and walking to the park as a group.”

Y/N felt someone say her name so she turns and looks over. Not realizing where she was going, the loud bang of the locker got her attention and bumped into a boy.

“Sorry, sorry. My bad,” Y/N smiles, the boy smiled back, “No, it was my fault.”

Y/N looks at him, “You new?” She asked. The boy shakes his head, “Not really. We kind of know each other. I don’t think we ever said hi or whatever.”

“Oh, well, I’m Y/N.”

“I’m Matthew, but you can call me Matt,” He said. Y/N smiles with a nod, “Cool. I guess I’ll see you around.” Matt nods up at her, “Yeah.” Y/N began to walk away till the boy turns. “I think you should know Derek and Henry have been saying some shit about you,” He says.

Y/N turns, “Like really bad,” He said. Y/N’s jaw tensed as she looks around, “Yeah, yeah. I saw what they said online.”

“Not just that stuff they said online. Just other things too,” He said. Y/N didn’t want to say anything towards that. What could she say? Tell Derek and Henry to fuck off?

No.

“Hey, Matt!” A girl comes up and she stops beside him, “Hey, Y/N.” Sarah said. Y/N forces a smile on her face, “Hey, Sarah.” Matthew looks over to Y/N, “We should talk later, okay?” He asks. Y/N nods. “Okay. See ya.” She turns away from the two and walks down the hall.

Matt and Y/N both looked back at each other.

After the talk with Leonard Patz not too long ago, Peterson and Duffy had spoken to him and they don’t think he’s tied to this murder case. It was just another dead end. Andy didn’t want to mention that knife from his daughter.

But he heard about the search for something tied to the case. Andy began to drive up the road to meet the cop cars and people who were lined up for the search in yellow jackets and whistles.

He pulled up to an officer and rolled his window down. “Mr. Barber,” The officer greets.

“Any luck so far?” Andy asked. The officer shook his head, “No, not yet, but we still got a couple hours of daylight left.” Andy looks forward up the road, “Okay, if I hang back here?” He asks.

“Sure, wherever you want,” The officer said. Andy rolls up his window and finds a spot to park.

A few minutes passed and the officer offers him a cup of coffee.

The officer pours him a cup off coffee from his canister, “Thanks, Dave,” Andy said. Dave nods, “You bet.” The radio behind them continued to go off about the units as Andy takes a sip of coffee. He looks out to the forest and turns his head to that trail where the sign stood.

He spotted Eric what looked like he was in a rush, stomping his way over to the cops and Andy leans off the car. Andy puts his cup down and walks around down to the trail.

Andy walks up, “Eric?”

“Someone told me they saw you. What the hell are you doing here?” He sounded upset. “Where else would I be?” Andy asked, his hands stuffed into his coat jacket.

“I told him. I said I want another DA,” Eric said, “Someone who’s not just gonna sit on his hands.” Andy listened to his words carefully. He was confused, so he sighed, “Eric, I don’t know what I’ve done to upset you-”

“It’s doesn’t matter. They’re taking you off the case,” Eric states.

Andy’s heart drops. “Excuse me?”

“You don’t believe me? Call your boss. Go ahead,” He says. Andy looks up and shuffles, “You talked to Lynn?” He asked.

“You’re out, Andy,” Eric smiles happily but sadly, “Thank fucking God.” The man takes his heel and turns own the trail. “Eric. Eric!” Andy calls, the man ignores his calls and storms off the scene. Could Eric be right? Was he drunk and tried to make Andy make some mistake?

Andy needed answers from Lynn. Slipping his phone out, he takes his contacts out and clicks on Lynn. The phone rung and was immediately picked up.

“Lynn Canavan’s office.”

“It’s Andy Barber,” Andy says.

“Yes. Just a minute,” The man said. Andy waits for her voice for a second, “Hello, Andy-”

“Lynn, hi, listen, I--”

“I need you to come down here right away,” She says. The sound of her voice wasn’t a good sound. Andy looks down the trail, watching Eric storm further down the trail. Thinking maybe he was right. “Is something wrong?” He asked. “Just come back to the office. Okay? Please. We need to talk face-to-face.”

There was no use in arguing. “Yeah, okay.”

Y/N was listening to her playlist up the street as she kept her head low. Her foot kicking the rock as it rolled ahead in front of her. Her eyes look up and spot her house. But spot the three cop cars in front of her house. She heard Milo barking furiously at the front door.

After looking at the posts of that search today, she didn’t need this. She turns away from the cop cars and walked down the road the other way.

Andy stops in front of the court building and jumps out of his car, locking it. His feet pick up as he ran up the stairs and met the front door. “Barber,” Someone says.

He stops and looks over to the two CPAC officers, “DA asked us to escort you in.” Andy looked around if this man was serious. Did Lynn think he would be some psycho to be escorted to a place he knew and worked for years.

“Seriously?” The officer nods. “Jesus Christ,” Andy mutters in annoyance as he heads in while the officers followed him from behind. After greeting his friend Kingston, he gets passed the scans and walks through the offices, following the officer in front.

The people around, started staring as he passed through. He enters her office and holds his arms out to her, “Did you really need all this, Lynn?” He asks, “What do you think I’m gonna do, jump out the window?”

“It’s simply protocol,” She states. The door closes, “Are you firing me?”

“Nobody’s getting fired,” Lynn said, she gestures to the woman beside her, “You know Reiko Ishida from public affairs.” The woman nods at him. “Mr. Barber.” Andy stares at the two in disbelief and confusion.

“Have a seat, Andy.” Slowly and calmly, he walks over, dropping his coat on the seat before glancing at the officers who stood tall. But they never scared him. He sat down, running his palm down his tie before bringing his attention to Lynn.

“We have some bad news on the Miller case,” She began, ��The print we lifted from the victim’s sweatshirt... is from your daughter.”

Andy looks at her, confused. “Wait, what?”

“It’s a match for her right forefinger,” Lynn slides him the paper and he flips the paper over to see the finger prints. “From the angle, they think maybe she reached over and grabbed the victim by her coat, leaving a print on the tag.” Andy shakes his head.

“There’s got to be an explanation,” He began.

“I’m sure there is.”

“They go to the same school. Y/N’s in her class. They’re best friends,” He says. “Yes, we know that,” Lynn said.

“This doesn’t mean anything,” He adds. Lynn nods, “We know, Andy.” He thinks they’re assuming she’s a suspect. His daughter would never. He thinks of the horrible idea and turns to the CPAC officers and turns to Lynn.

“Have you arrested her?” He asked. Lynn doesn’t respond and it made it worse for him. “Lynn, have you arrested my daughter?”

“Not yet, no.”

“But you’re going to?” He asks.

“We have no choice given the circumstances,” Lynn replies. “Do you have a warrant?” He asked.

“We are getting it now,” She said. Andy leans forward, “Lynn, I give you my word, she’ll turn herself in. You don’t have to arrest her. She doesn’t belong in jail. Not even for one night. She’s not a flight risk. She’s my daughter! Please, don’t arrest her.”

“Andy...”

“Please!” He says more harshly. “It’s not even a close call. You know that,” She said, calmly. “Why?” He asked, “Because of a fingerprint? One fingerprint?” Lynn tried to calm him down with the same tone of hers. It didn’t seem to help at all.

“You need to get a lawyer for Y/N,” She says. The idea of his daughter going to jail and court was not what he wanted. Not what she wanted. The future came to his mind as he leans back in disbelief. “You’re ruining her life, do you know that?” His voice sounded heartbroken, “You’re gonna destroy it. You’ve seen her in person, you know she doesn’t do these things.”

The silence grew more as Lynn doesn’t take excuse to keep Y/N from going into court. “I’m following the evidence. That’s my job,” She watched his chest heave up and down, “Look, I have to view her as I would any other suspect or it will reek of preferential treatment. This decision has been made, Andy.”

He lifts up his head, “Wait, wait, wait. What about Leonard Patz?” He asked, “We just started looking into him. Talk to Pam Duffy. She can explain.”

“We did,” Lynn scoffs, “There is more going on here than you’re aware of.”

“More than what? A fingerprint?” He almost shouts, “Tell me, goddamn it!” He slams his hand and stands up. He spotted her eyes move towards the CPAC officers and Andy turns to them. They began to be defensive. “Sorry,” He holds his hands up, “Hey. That was--” Andy takes a deep breath and sits back down.

“I’m asking you as a favor to me and my family. Please don’t do this--”

“We’re putting you on paid leave, effective immediately,” The two began to talk over each other. Andy pleads for dear life. “What am I suppose to tell Laurie?” He asks.

“Andy, I’m sorry,” Lynn said.

The shatter in his eyes were practically showing. The horror and disbelief as he gives her the pleading eyes of a man who just wants his family to not be treated this way. Not even his daughter who isn’t 15 yet.

A daughter who hasn’t reached life goals.

He leans forward, “I’m begging you.”

“Look, I need you to listen to me. We all care about you. I care very much. Whatever it is your daughter may have done...” Lynn’s voice began to echo in his ears as his eyes slowly drag down the table and he stared at the papers in front of him.

The fingerprint. Left to be his daughters. It could’ve ended up there any time. His daughter laughed with Alice, they hung out. He heard his name echo in his ear as he stared at the table.

“Andy,” Lynn says again. The man snaps from his thoughts and looks up, “Who gets this case?”

Lynn would know he wouldn’t like the answer but he asked for it. “Neal.” Without any further, he grabs his coat and looks back. “Are we done here?” He asks, standing up.

He rushes out of the office and heads down the stairs, holding up the phone to his ear.

The caller went to voicemail. “Y/N, honey, it’s Dad. I need to know where you are,” He said, “Call me as soon as you get this.”

Andy speeds up the road, passing the cars lane by lane, earning the long amount of honks and shouts as the car buzzed with a phone call. “Come on, Laurie. Pick up, pick up, pick up.”

He reaches the intersection and spots the light go red. He doesn’t even budge his foot to hit the break. He pushes the gas and drives through, one car took a sharp turn and a few cars had stopped as well while Andy continued to drive.

Looking back, no one was hurt so he continued.

He called Laurie again. “Come on, Laurie. Pick up the phone.”

“Hi. You’ve reached Laurie Barber.”

“Goddamn it,” He mutter, pushing the hang up button. After a few minutes on heading home, his phone rang. He pushes the button on his wheel, “Laurie.”

“What’s wrong? Is Y/N okay?” She asked. “She’s fine. I just need you to come home right now,” He says, “I can explain everything when you get there.” Andy knew Laurie was probably rushing out of the cottage to her car so he might see her there at the same time he does.

“No, tell me now,” She says.

“Just please come home. Duffy’s on her way there and she has a search warrant. I just want to try and get there before--”

“A search warrant?” Laurie cuts him off, “Oh my God. This is about the knife, isn’t it?”

“No. That--” He stops, “Just come home right now. I can explain everything. I promise.”

“Okay,” She says. Andy reaches the house and spots the police already at their house. He pulls into his driveway about halfway to step out quickly. Ignoring the officers, he walks over his lawn. “Mr. Barber!” The familiar officer called, Andy doesn’t respond.

“Sir! You know this house is frozen.”

Andy turns, “You got a warrant yet?” The officer doesn’t respond, “Yeah, I didn’t think so.It’s my house. I have a right to go inside.”

“Sir, do you have a canine. A white and brown pointer?”

“Yeah, what about him?” Andy takes the stairs up to his front door. “We tried to catch him but it seemed like he freaked out and ran off.” Andy curses under his breath and began to open his door.

“Andy!” Someone calls. The man turns to see Duffy in her car. She steps out and holds out the papers that he assumed was the search warrant. First, Y/N, then Milo and now this. He sighed.

“I’m really sorry, Andy,” She says, “Is Y/N here?”

Andy looks up, “I don’t think so. Lost our dog, now...”

“Any idea where she would be? I’m sure we can find your dog as well, if that helps.” Andy shakes his head. “Have you tried her phone?” Duffy asked.

“She must have turned it off. You probably know that by now,” He said. Duffy looks at her feet and then looks at the red door to their house. “Listen, I’m gonna need you to wait outside. You know the drill.”

Andy sighs softly and turns to unlock the door to his home.He opens it and turns to her, “Don’t fuck this up, Pam. I mean it. Do your job.”

“I won’t,” She said. Duffy looks at the officers and they began to move in. Some policemen stood outside along with the neighbors as well. Some older fellows. Andy wasn’t so sure where Y/N would be by now.

Milo was gone as well. Hopefully he will return in a few hours. Can’t have Y/N’s best furry friend be lost as well.

The policemen searched every crevice. Every cushion, mattress. Ripped every book from shelves, opened them, took Y/N’s devices in her room. Taking pictures of the knives and other things to document for the case.

Andy hears Laurie’s car pull in and he walks over to her stepping out worried. “What is happening? Where’s Y/N?” She asked, Andy gently grabs her shoulders.

“It’s okay,” He says, Laurie looks over his shoulder. “Andy, what are they doing? Where is she?”

“They’re searching the house. We still haven’t found Y/N. Milo is gone, too.”

“What?” Laurie asks. Andy pulls her into a hug. “It’s okay. They’re gonna be okay, honey.” Laurie hugs him back as they stood like that for a while. Could Y/N turn up to this now? She probably found them before they did. Ran off in fear.

Where was she?

The night had grown cold and the crickets chirped loudly as Andy and Laurie sat outside their back porch. “I don’t know who else to call,” Laurie says.

“She’ll turn up. I’m sure she’s scared.”

“What about Milo? Should we make papers?”

“Milo will turn up, too. He’s a good dog, he knows where we are.” Laurie runs her hand through her hair and sighed. Andy looks at her and pulls the chair to sit in front of her.

Laurie sniffles as he takes her hand in his. “I threw it away,” He said, Laurie looks up at him, “The knife. His knife.”

“What? Why would you do that?” She asked.

“You wanted to keep it in the house?” He asked. Laurie slightly rolled her eyes, “Oh, my God. You knew this would happen, didn’t you? That Y/N was a suspect.”

“No,” He replies, “No, I was as blindsided as you were. I just wanted it out of the house. I didn’t know any of this would happen.” Before the two could talk more, the door behind them opens and Duffy comes out with a soft sigh.

“Okay. I think we’re all done,” Pam glanced at Laurie and smiled, “Laurie. Any word from Y/N?” She asked the couple. Andy drops his head. “We’ve called everyone.”

“We have state and local looking for him,” Duffy says. “She’s must be hiding,” Laurie said.

“Do you know that for certain?” Pam asked. “No. I guess she just saw the police outside and got scared.”

“Why would she assume that they were here for her?” Andy holds his hand up to his wife to keep her from answering that from Duffy. “We’re not answering any more questions tonight, and that includes Y/N when she shows up. I don’t want anyone grilling her. She’s a minor, she has a right to a parent present. So don’t try to pull anything,” Andy warns.

“Jeez, Andy, nobody’s gonna do anything without you there.”

“I know. I know. Just... don’t,” He says.

“It could help her.” Andy rolls his eyes and turns away, “Come on. Who are you talking to?” Duffy pierces her lips and sadly frowns. “I really am sorry about this. I’m sorry about your dog, Milo.”

Andy nods at her, “I know you are.”

“Okay, well, I’m gonna go wait out front,” Duffy takes a step to the door but then stops, “Just so you know, they may have found the knife.” Andy and Laurie both look up to her.

“Really? Where?” They both think it was Y/N’s. “Not sure. I just found out.” Duffy began to head to the door and she grips the doorknob. “She didn’t do this, Pam,” Andy confirms, “I know you and I aren’t gonna talk much after this, so I just wanted you to hear it from me. She didn’t do this,” He shakes his head.

All Duffy could do was nod at the couple, “I’ll keep you informed.”

An hour passed and police were out searching for the Barber girl in Newton. Checking roads, yards. One last place they didn’t check was the play structure. Not too far from the elementary and Archer Middle.

The police woman steps out of her car and turns on her flashlight. Walking up to the play structure. Shining every small space and obstacle, she was getting close to leaving the area.

She met the swings and scanned from the right. She heard a squeal of the metal swing and turns to the left. Her flashlight shining on the girl in front of her. The tears fell from the girl’s eyes as the woman sighs. “You Y/N Barber?”

Y/N lowers her head and she slowly stands up. The officer pulls out the cuffs and walks up. “Hands in front please.” Y/N held her hands forward and she cuffs her wrists.

“I’ll get your backpack,” The officer said, taking the bag off the ground and began to guide the girl to her car. Opening the back door, she holds the girl’s head and helps her in. Closing the door to head on her side, into the driver’s seat.

The officer dropped her bag on the passenger seat and got in. “You’re Henry’s mom, right?” Y/N’s voice sounded hoarse, probably from the crying. “I am,” Amber said coldly, not rudely just a plain monotone voice.

“A lot of people are looking for you, you know,” She said. Amber turns the key in the car and it turns on. Y/N looks between the bars, “I didn’t do it.”

“Do what?” Amber asks. Y/N’s bottom lip quivers as she stares at her cuffs. “Kill her. I didn’t...” Amber looks in her rear view mirror, watching the tears pool her eyes.

“I just found her... She was just lying there on the ground and... I thought maybe she was hurt or something, so I went to help-- to pick her up,” Her fingers began to twist in another, “Then... I saw the blood on her and I saw that her eyes were open, and I knew that she was dead. So I got scared and I ran home,” She says.

Amber finally had her body turned to the Barber girl. “Did you tell anyone?” She asks, Y/N began to shake her head as she tried not to burst down in tears. “Why not?” Amber asks.

Y/N sniffles as the streaks of her tears reflected off the outside light. “Okay. Well, I’m gonna take you down to the police station now.” Y/N needed someone. She was scared.

She only wanted one person who’d tell her, it’s okay. She chokes a sob, “I want my dad.” She lowers her head and sobs, “Please, I really want my dad.”

Laurie stared in front of the road intently. After that hour, the station had called them that their daughter was found.

No Milo yet.

Andy shuffles in his seat after getting the small flashes in the back of his head and Laurie looks over. “What are you thinking?”

“Nothing,” He said.

“Don’t,” She shook her head, “Don’t you dare shut me out. Not now. Whatever worst-case scenarios you’re considering. I need to know what we’re dealing with here.”

“I don’t know what we’re dealing with yet,” He says, Laurie looks at him and they both glance at each other. He turns back to the road. “I’m just thinking about Y/N.”

Laurie rubs her forehead and stares out her side of the window. What if they keep her in jail for a week? What will they do with her? Laurie tried to push those thoughts away and repeated the words.

Our baby’s gonna be okay.

The officer at the station took the couple down to hall to one of the rooms to meet their daughter, Y/N. Andy sat at the table and Laurie was walking slowly to the side, worryingly. She couldn’t pace around the room, it would make Andy freak out.

The two hear the door click and they see Y/N walk in with cuffs around her wrists. The couple walk up and stood by as the officer takes the cuffs off. Y/N reached for her mother and Laurie pulls her in and quietly sobbed. Andy holds his girls close to him and they pull away. Laurie cups her cheek, the tears rubbing against her palm. “Are you all right, honey?”

Y/N looks at her father and choked a sob. “Hey...” Andy caresses her head and pulls her in a tight hug. “Come on,” The family sat at the table and Y/N rubbed her fingers against the markings on her wrists from the cuffs.

“Y/N, sweetheart,” Andy says, Y/N looks up, “Before we came here, we wanted to tell you that Milo had ran off.”

“Where?” Y/N asked, “Are they looking for him?”

“They are, we’re gonna find him, I promise,” Andy said. Y/N lowers her head and sighs. “They really think I killed Alice?” She asked. Andy leans forward,”It’s a mistake. We’re gonna figure it out. Don’t worry,” He said.

“How is this even happening?” Y/N asks. Andy shakes his head, “I don’t know. I don’t know, but we’re gonna clear it up.”

Laurie rubs Y/N’s arm, soothingly, “Sweetheart, we know you’re scared. We all are.”

“They said I can’t go home,” She says. “No, not tonight. But there’s gonna be an arraignment first thing in the morning,” Andy states. Y/N slightly puffs out a small amount of air like a scoff. “It’s the proceeding, isn’t it?”

Andy cracked a small smile at that. She knew the work of the jury. “That’s right. You know it. They’re gonna read the charge, they’re gonna set the bail, then we’ll take you right home.”

“You sure?” She asked.

“Absolutely. You’ll be home by dinner. I give you my word,” Andy said. Y/N swallows thickly, “How much is bail?” Andy looks at Laurie, unsure, “I don’t know. We’ll find that out tomorrow.”

Y/N looks at the couple in fear, “What if we can’t afford it? What happens to me then?”

“We’ll find the money. It’s okay,” Laurie reaches for Y/N’s hand to reassure her. “We have savings. The house--”

“Yeah, but what if--”

“Hey. Hey,” Andy placed his hand in front of his daughter, “Let us worry about that. Okay?” Y/N drops her head to look into her lap before they see her large frown and she inhales to calm herself down. “I’m so-- I’m so sorry. I didn’t-- I didn’t do it. I swear. I didn’t do it,” She says.

“We believe you,” Andy says. Y//N sobs and shakes her head, “I know... I know I’m not, like, the perfect kid or anything,” Andy was taken back from that. “But I didn’t do it.”

“You are perfect, sweetheart.”

“Alice and I were best friends. She was just, a friend I’ve never had in school. Why would I kill her? Why? Why would they think that?” Y/N looks over to her dad, “Is it because of what Derek and Henry said?”

Andy sighs, “I don’t know.”

“What do you mean? This is your case,” Y/N asks. The silence grew as the couple look at each other. Andy’s hands come together and his fingers play with the band on his finger.

“Y/N, did you tell the arresting officer that you found Alice’s body? Is that true?” He asked, Y/N turns to her mother. “And you didn’t tell us? Honey, how could you not tell us that?”

Y/N wipes the tears off her cheek, “I didn’t tell anybody.” Andy knew Y/N was hiding things and this is not what he expected it to be. Did Y/N find Alice’s body after that party and ran away?

“I thought, you know... that I’d get blamed for it.” Andy slightly cranes back, “I know that was really dumb of me.” Y/N sees her mother reach for her mouth. “I know that I wish I had. I just--... I got scared and now...”

Y/N hears her mother slightly sob and she looks over, “Mom. Please don’t cry.” Laurie holds her hand up and tried her best not to breakout in front of her daughter. “Y/N, I need you to listen to me very carefully, okay? Don’t say anything to anybody else about this.”

Y/N lowers her head. “Do you understand what I’m saying? That’s very important,” He watches her, “Sweetheart.”

“Yes,” Y/N lifts her head up and nods. “I mean it. Not one word. When we get home, we can talk about all of this, but until then, you don’t--” The knocks interrupt his sentence to hint that it was time.

Andy slid his hand away from his daughter. Y/N began to panic, “You’re leaving? They’re not gonna let you stay?”

“We’re gonna meet you at the courthouse first thing in the morning. We’ll have a lawyer. We’ll have--”

“Why can’t you be my lawyer?” Y/N asks. Andy tilts his head, “No, I can’t.” Y/N looks at her mother, “Why not? I want you, dad.”

“I can’t for a number of reasons. It’s a bad idea.”The knocks echo in the room again and Y/N looks at the wooden door. The door opens and the officer stood at the door.

Laurie was the first to hug Y/N once she stood up. “We love you so much.You know that? You know how much we love you?” Laurie looks at her daughter and Y/N nods.

She turns to Andy and she crashed into his body, wrapping her arms around him. Andy leans into her ear, “Be strong, okay, sweetheart? I love you very much.”

“I love you, too...” She says. Andy rubs her back and they let her go with the officer to stay overnight till morning. After Y/N left, Laurie covers her mouth and Andy pulls her in a hug. Sobbing in his shoulder, he kept Laurie close.

Their daughter will be protected.

He promised it.

How far is he willing to?

~~~

End of Chapter 5!

TAGS:

@jtargaryen18 @joannaliceevans-fanficblog @chrisevans-imagines @iguessweallcrazyithinktho @sweater-daddiesdumbdork @patzammit @axen-gers @navispalace @ifuseekamyevans @princess-evans-addict @sophi @ssebstann @x-black-haired-emo-x @irishfaulk97

#chris evans x reader #chris evans #andy barber #andy barber x reader #father x daughter #defending jacob #defending jacob x reader #everything is cool #episode two #season one #apple tv+#apple #murder #crime

94 notes · View notes

lettingmydreamsspeak · 4 years

Text

The Heart Knows Best: Part III

Summary: They still can’t get each other off their minds. Little do they know that even though distance plays a huge factor in ever knowing one another, something is bringing them together.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Female Reader

Warnings: None

Word count: approx. 2300

Author’s Note: If this is your first time reading this series, catch up with Part I and Part II here. Thanks to those who have read the series so far and have sent messages. It is great to hear from those who are reading it. It is my hope to have Part IV up shortly.

************************************************************************

You couldn’t be happier to be home. You already felt like you needed a vacation from your vacation, but the demands of work would quickly occupy your mind. As you turned on your phone upon arriving at the airport terminal, the number on your email app grew. It was your boss inquiring about the timelines for various projects. She must have tracked your flight and knew that once you arrived it would be hard for you to avoid all the emails that she would be sending. Since taking an entry level position as a junior illustrator for an international publishing firm, you had worked your way up the ranks to work directly with the lead art director, as the senior illustrator. Because of your talent and determination, this position allowed for you to gain some of the highest profile accounts that came through the firm, working with some of the most well-known authors. Who knew that all those years of drawing since you were a little girl, would lead to this dream job. Even though the demands of the job could be overwhelming at times, no amount of pressure would take away the love you had for it.

Your brother Ben offered to pick you up from the airport, knowing that you would like to see a familiar face at the other end of customs when you arrived. He wasn’t wrong. The two of you were only two years apart. He was older than you, and as a stereo typical older brother to a sister, he protected you. As you passed through the doors to find what seemed to be a sea of thousands of people, Ben’s smiling face greeted you.

“Welcome home sis!”

Ben gave you the biggest hug, as if he hadn’t seen you for months on end.

“Thank you for coming to get me. I would much rather sit in the front passenger seat and control the music for once!”

You both had a good laugh, because you both knew all too well that you were the one that would control the playlists while on road trips with your family and friends.

As you slowly made your way to Ben’s car, you were a lot more quiet than usual. Ben was used to you talking his ear off, telling him all the stories of your adventures you had while you were away.

“Is everything ok, Y/n?”

You knew that he would ask you that very question and debated on whether you would tell him the truth, or tell him the smallest of lies. You felt compelled to tell him the truth, but it would take some time to get there.

“I’m definitely tired. Do you think that maybe we can go for ice cream? I’m not quite ready to go home and just want to hang out with you Ben.”

“I’ll never say no to ice cream! You must want to talk about something though; we never just go for ice cream. Wait a sec……what is his name and do I need to beat him up?”

Not sure how to respond yet again, you stop and look at him before crawling into the car. Looking at Ben’s stature, with was tall and skinny, you weren’t sure that he had the muscles to withstand a fight with anyone.

“You might not want to pick a fight with him, Ben. And if you really want to know, you already know him. His name is Chris…...”

************************************************************************

Chris laid down on the grass, staring up at the clouds through a clearing the in the trees that towered above him. Dodger ran circles around him, stopping every once in a while to lick his face or nudge him in the arm so that he would play with him. He was grateful for the energy of this dog, keeping him on toes and distracting him from what was really going on in his life. He was avoiding his phone and emails for the rest of the day, knowing that he had some work to do.

“Dodge, what am I supposed to do?”

He stopped making circles around Chris and proceeded to lick his face again. It’s like he knew that Chris needed a little extra love and support that day.

“Alright, that wasn’t really the answer I was looking for, but I appreciate all the love you are giving me today, bud. I need it.”

Chris sat up and pulled Dodger in to give him a hug before getting up to make his way back into the house, where Scott just finished making supper for the two of them.

“Hey Dopey, are you ready to eat something?”

“Yeah.”

Chris quietly took a seat at the kitchen table as Scott dished out some food for him, one scoop at a time, seeing if he would tell him when to stop. Chris sat there just staring at the food piling up, as Scott captured it all on video, figuring that one day Chris will need a good laugh at his own expense.

“Do you know if the kids left any books around here last time they came to visit?”

“I’m pretty sure they did.”

“I need to pick out a children’s book to recommend and I would love it to be one that they like.”

“Why don’t you make it a little more personable and it be one that you always read to them. I’m pretty sure they left the books in your office on the bookshelf, thinking that Uncle Chris might need some easy reading material when they aren’t around. Also, you better eat entire pile of pasta…”

Chris looked down as he dropped his fork on the table, laughing at the sight before him, causing him to shake his head. He picked the fork back up, took a few bites and pushed his plate away.

“Thank you for supper Scott. Just leave the dishes and I will clean them up later.”

“You didn’t even really eat! I’m telling mom!”

“Go ahead!”

Chris left the table on a mission to let his mind escape. He entered his office and b-lined it to the bookshelf that lined the walls across the room from his desk. Starting at the middle of the bookcase, he scoured the shelves for the kids books. He stopped for a moment and realized he was looking in the wrong spot. He turned his eyes downward to the bottom shelf, where the kids could safely reach the shelves. There they were. Nicely placed, looking at if they were meant to be a part of the collection, standing upright thanks to the bookend. Chris sat on the floor against the shelf, looking through the books. There was something about those books that made Chris feel sentimental for a moment. He loved those kids and he loved those books. There was one in particular that stood out to him. It had a picture of a dog on the front that always reminded him of Dodger. The kids loved that book so much because of the dog in the story. You could see the love for that book with the bent corner and chocolate pudding stained pages. This had to be the book that he was going to use for his project.

Scott and Dodger snuck into the office and sat beside Chris, looking through the books with him, noticing the book that was in his hands.

“The kids really do love that book. I should record you reading this book and we should send it to them!”

“You know, that’s not a bad idea. They would love it. Funny voices and all.”

Scott pulled out his phone and started to record the video. Sounding very stately as he started reading; he introduced the author of the book, then the illustrator.

“This book is illustrated by Y/N Y/L/N………I love how the dog in this book looks like Dodger!!! Here we go. Once Upon a Time…”

Without even noticing, he had said her name aloud. If only he knew…

************************************************************************

It was time for you to show your face at the office. You figured you could just sneak in without anyone noticing, as you were determined to have a productive day, without any distractions. You felt inspired and ready to create some images for the books that were coming across your desk prior to your vacation. Knowing that it would take a few hours to really get the ideas down on paper, you put your head phones on to help you focus. The hours passed without even taking a break. Your boss scared you out of focus as she reviewed your progress and was pleased with the results so far. She was always amazed with your work and your overall work ethic. As she left you to you continue with your work, you noticed that your phone screen was lighting up. It was best that you took a break for a late lunch and to catch up with the messages that were left for you. For the most part, it was your clients wanting to touch base and see how the illustrations were coming along. There were also a few messages from Haley. She usually sent you random jokes or quotes to help you get through your day, but it seemed as if there was something a little more urgent. 5 missed calls and one text stating that you should call her when you get the chance.

You were feeling a little selfish at that moment, but now was not the time for you to get into a serious conversation with her. You ignored her messages, placed the phone out of sight, and got back to work, knowing that all the drawings wouldn’t finish themselves.

************************************************************************

It was a new day, and it was certainly feeling like it for the first time in a few days. With an early start to the day, Chris was productive on answering a series of emails from producers and his agent. Taking a break from this work, he found a spot in the sun filled living room to do some recreational reading. His brother sat across the room from him, staring at his phone, as if he were in a deep text conversation with who knows who. With a lack of desire to spend his time catching up on social media, little did Chris know that Scott had made a little post that morning, captioning it: “Story Time with Uncle Chris”.

Just as Chris had suspected, Scott was reading through text from friends and a multitude of messages in response to the post. There was so much love for this video, but who wouldn’t fall in love with Chris reading yet another children’s book. Sorting through his direct messages, he saw one titled “I Need Your Help…”. Typically these kinds of messages were from people asking for some kind of hand out to help with their cause and would easily be passed by, but for some reason Scott felt compelled to read this message.

Hey Scott, I know we don’t know each other, but we might have an unexpected connection that I need your help with. My friend Y/n happened to be in Manhattan recently, and was helped out by your brother Chris on a rainy morning in Central Park a couple of days ago. I know she is forever grateful for what your brother did to help out. If you can pass on her thanks to him, I know she would appreciate it.

Thanks so much, Haley.

Ps. You know that book Chris is reading in your most recent post…Y/n illustrated it!

“Shut up.”

“I’m being quiet, why are you telling me to shut up?”

“Sorry! I was just reading texts from friends. I thought I said that in my head.”

In complete shock of the message he just read, Scott started to formulate a reply to Haley. With zero confidence in what to say back to her, his response was short and to the point.

Hi Haley, we should chat…

************************************************************************

“You have reached Haley! Sorry I can’t answer your call right now. Either I’m ignoring you, or I’m actually busy. Either way, just text me and I promise to get back to you!”

Her message always made you laugh, as her phone went right to voice mail. She was actually busy on the other line. You felt a little anxious about what she needed to tell you. It was a long day and it felt like you needed a glass of wine to calm your nerves. A nice spot on your balcony looking over the waterfront was the solution. The perks of your job found you living close to the office, in a condo looking over Coal Harbour. It was the dream and you were living it. As you sat down and put your feet up, taking a deep breath, you saw that Haley was now returning your call.

“Hales, I’m sorry that I didn’t return your call earlier. It was a busy first day back at the office.”

“Hi to you too, can you please look at the text I just sent you. But make sure you have me on speaker…please!”

A little puzzled by her request, you put her on speaker and loaded her message.

“What the heck are you sending me? Is this just another gif of a cat dressed up at an old lady?”

“Just watch it.”

The video came up. It was Chris. A smile came to your face. You see him sitting on the floor of what seemed to be a home library or office, with Dodger snuggled in against his leg. He was holding what appeared to be a book. Not really paying attention to what he is saying at the start of the video, you finally focus in on it.

“This book is illustrated by Y/N Y/L/N………I love how the dog in this book looks like Dodger!!! Here we go. Once Upon a Time…”

Your heart stopped. He said your name without even realizing it. You sat in shock as you closed the video, not needing to watch any more of it.

“So…..?”

“He said my name.”

Staring blankly at the phone, you aren’t too sure what to make of all of this. What were the chances that this would happen?

“Should I bring you more wine?”

“Yes please.”

To be continued in Part IV

#Chris Evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans imagine #chris evans x reader #chris evans reader #agirlcandream #chris evans x y/n

57 notes · View notes

might-guys-acorn · 4 years

Note

Do you do hc's? If you do, could you do Akatsuki relationship hc's please?

Ive never done hc's before, but Im gonna do my best :) hope they turn out okay! -🦎

P.S. this post will be super long, so my apologies in advance folks❤

===============================

Pain

Super quiet baby.

Shows his affection through actions, not words

Has difficulties showing his emotions, but genuinely tries his best.

Isnt sure how to be in a relationship, so is very awkward. Stutters a lot when talking to or about you: "Uh.... Y/N.....I think you look, uh, s-stunning today."

Blushes all the time.

You love it

So you do literally anything in your power to cause it. Brushing his hair out of his face, complimenting him in front of others, kissing him on the cheek randomly, etc.

Loves kissing in the rain. It overwhelms his senses, from the feel of the drops on his skin, to the smell of your hair, to the light shiver he can feel run down your spine after a while. He loves every second.

Will do anything for you. Legitimately ready to end the world for the one that he loves

Konan

Super sentimental type

Talks about her past a lot, and wants to hear all about yours.

Emotional connection is an absolute must, looks are always second in her book

Want you to get along with her friends, specifically Pain. You two are the most important people in her life, so its essential that you get along.

Thinks its precious that youre interested in her hobbies. Plenty of nights will be spent trying to help you learn origami, but at the end of the day, theres just a bunch of lopsided cranes and crumple flowers around the two of you asleep on the carpet.

I dont think shed be much of a cook, so meals are a must for you. She'll always compliment you on it though : "Y/N, this breakfast looks lovely. How'd I end up with a catch like you?"

She does make a mean cup of tea though

Likes to leave little notes or origami figures around for you to find when shes away :)

Deidara

Super obnoxious ngl

Likes to show you off to everybody. Like. Everyone. Other members, enemies, people on the street. You name it.

"LOOK AT MY S/O! ARENT THEY THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BEING YOUVE EVER SEEN? THEY ARE ART ITSELF, I ALMOST WANT TO BLOW THEM UP, THEYRE THAT GORGEOUS."

Theres never a quiet moment with him

Especially right before bed, when he starts to babble nonsense because hes tired. You never knew a person could have so many thoughts until he never let one pass without it leaving his mouth

His babbling is pretty endearing though, because he is forever thinking about how amazing you are

But the only way to shut him up is to kiss him

Luckily, hes an incredibly good kisser

Will forever refer to you as his muse. And model many an artwork after you. Its very sweet until he makes them explode to show off the 'true beauty'

Sasori

Very detached at the beginning

Doesnt like having ties to this world

But he soon realizes there's no way to get rid of you, and he doesnt particularly want to either.

After that realization, he spends as much time with you as possible

Expect lots of cuddles, quiet nights, and endless hours of talking. About his past, his parents, his puppets. He wants you to know it all, because he feels like with all of it, he has to be unlovable

Is very shocked when you stick around and accept him, becomes very attached to you afterwards.

Doesnt do dates often, but on the occasional one, hes incredibly punctual and expects you to be

Hes very insecure about his "heart". He absolutely melts if you take time to let him know that its wonderful, just like him

Overall, hes just very relieved to have you in his life

Itachi

Truly surprised to be in a relationship at all

This isnt part of his mission

100% soft boi™️

Loves to hold your hand, kiss your knuckles, gaze into your eyes, all of it. Anything he has to do to remind himself that youre real, and that you love him.

Becomes a literal puddle when he realizes youre trying to name and differentiate all of his crows

Lets you feed them regularly and marvels at how sweet they are to you

Doesnt understand how someone so pure could be with someone like him, but wont complain simply because he hates the thought of losing this light he's found in his life.

Spends all his time making sure youre happy. Taking care of you when your sick, reading to you on long nights, cuddling you when you get sad. He just wants you to feel better

Doesnt give gifts often, so when you find your favorite one of his crows (Midnight, youd named it) sitting on the table with a red bow around his neck, you cry for hours.

He gets confused and thinks hes done something wrong, but you just kiss him and tell him that its perfect.

Kisame

Doesnt realize hes fallen for you until he sees you wading in a river late at night, singing softly to yourself

Really likes holding your hand

Has some jealousy problems, but not because he doesn't trust you. He just doesn't trust everyone else.

Lots of beach dates

Thinks it's adorable how he has to convince you to get out of the water when its gotten dark and cold

Prefers you don't give him nicknames, just really likes the way his name sounds when it comes out of your mouth

Loves that youre not scared of Samehada, and thinks its precious when you talk to it like its a pet and not a sword

Is even more smitten when Samehada coos back at you, its loyalty to you both means the world to him

Hidan

Insists on your belief in Jashin

Wants you to believe and become immortal with him

The eternal Bonnie and Clyde

Also the kinkiest of the bunch

Has zero issue talking about bedroom business in front of anybody

Likes how you blush when he brings it up in front of large groups of people

"Aw look at how red your cheeks get, thats so cute"

Does things to get on your nerves, because he loves watching you react. Seeing how flustered he can make you is a frequent game he'll play, cuz your anger is just as cute as your smile

Likes to casually hand you his scythe even though its too heavy for you to handle

Watching you try to hold it up makes him laugh, and you yelling at him for laughing only makes it worse honestly

Will try to get you to go on missions with him, simply because you two work together better than anyone else. No one knows him like you do, so sacrifices are always more fruitful with your presence.

Kakuzu

The most distant of the organization

Will be very difficult to connect with

But when he realizes that you seem to know the bingo book better than he does, will insist that you work on his team

From there, he'll see your personality and be thankful for all the hearts he has, because there can be an extra to give to you.

Your smile makes his day, and seeing the way you squeal when the pay comes in for a takedown melts every heart he's got

Thankful that youre just as much of a tightwad as he is, it means you make a very cheap date

Appreciates your intellect, and is happy to have a partner that is as smart as they are attractive, unlike his past partner Hidan.

Silences are an essential part of the relationship, but niether of you mind. Your presence is all he needs to feel at ease, rather than filling the air with meaningless small talk

Tobi

Never fails to laugh at your jokes

Enjoys making you laugh, even if it means making himself look like an idiot

Definition of silly romantic

Will spend lots of time telling you that youre special to him, even if its in a way that doesnt make sense

"I dont need gravity when Im with you, Im always on cloud 9"

Likes to mess with you when you try to touch him by tranferring his body to other dimensions

"Youll have to try harder if you really want to hold my hand, Y/N"

When he does get serious, though, he'll pull you to his other dimension to talk. Its quieter and theres no risk of interruptions

Likes to hug you from behind, and always has a dumb joke on hand if he ever sees you crying

#akatsuki #akatsuki headcannons #pain #konan #deidara #sasori #hidan #itachi #kisame #tobi #naruto imagines #naruto #kakuzu

237 notes · View notes