#but then changed my mind because i want her to actually recieve

[rimunagenius]

And They Were Roomates

☙ pairing: Kate Martin x Roommate!reader

☙ word count: 2.5k words

☙ warnings: RPF!! use of y/n, not proof read.

☙ ri speaks: I need more kate martin content and i haven’t been fed the specific ones that i need so i must write them to the best of my horrendous abilities. Idek how good this will be…im sorry in advance LMFAO. also this is two thousand five hundred words but it looks a lot shorter….crying

this is also a general announcement that i will indeed be refreshing my blog, so that means new and updated master lists and posts are coming out soon so sorry if you get a spam of rimunagenius on your feed!!

Part 1

| Series Masterlist |

When you first started in Iowa, you never expected the immediate love you recieved from the people there. They were friendly, generous, and so much different from people in California. Especially your roommate, Kate Martin. You had met her shortly after your first day of Junior year. A while after, you two became roomates because you needed more space, and she needed someone to split rent with in her apartment. Sounded like a great deal to both of you.

"You don't mind?" You asked unsure. Not wanting to impose on her, possibly ruining plans with making a deal with her actual teammates.

"No! Not at all! I really like you and you're alot of fun! I'd love for you to move in with me." She beamed at you, giving you a side hug when she saw your expression change. You both were ecstatic.

Since then, you had been living with Kate for almost two years. You two had become inseparable. Always on campus together, meeting up between classes to get coffee or lunch together, sometimes with Caitlin and your other friends. It was great. You were happy with your home away from home.

You had transfered from UC Irvine and decided to pursue your degree and career in sports medicine here in Iowa City. You were one of the new athletic trainees and ocassionly a photographer; your previous major was in photography and Lisa and the administration had really loved your resume and work, so they hired you as a part time (barely) photographer, for whenever they wanted more shots than what they usually wanted or a fill in.

Currently, you were needed in the Carver stadium to help record a mic’d up practice session for the team. It was for the Iowa Hawkeye Youtube channel. You had experience because you too had a youtube channel that you started when you first transferred to Iowa. So you had told Lisa and the coaches that you’d be able to film it.

“Hey, Gabbie!” You smiled at her as you walked into the locker room, approaching Kate’s cubby to set your stuff down. Kate telling you this morning before she left that you could put your stuff with hers.

“Hey, girlie! So guess what?” You and Gabbie loved to gossip. It was so much fun and it started when you were redoing the tape on her ankles, and she looked down so you asked her about it, and since then, you both have told eachother whatever gossip you had.

“Oh my god, what?” You took your sweater out of your bag, the locker room being chilly, so you could imagine the court.

“So that boy Nick in my econ class, totally asked about you today. I didn’t want to crush his hopes and dreams but I did say you weren’t his type.” She took a seat next to where you were standing to put her shoes on.

“Wait, the boy I said would so be my type if he was a girl? That Nick?” You laughed because he was really nice and such a sweet guy but he just wasn’t a girl. Men are pretty but only to look at.

“Yes!”

“How’d he take it?” This guy has asked you out once before but you just said you weren’t looking to date. Probably should’ve elaborated on that one.

“But he asked me “Oh, who is? Does he go here?” And I was like,” she paused to reenact the face she made. “I said it too fast so I didn’t have time to say “Oh, It’s long distance or something” sooo I don’t know.” She rambled and just pulled her hair into a small ponytail.

“What do you mean? That made no sense, Gab.” You were confused. She looked guilty of something but you didn’t want to pressure her but you also really wanted to know what she had said about you to Nick.

“I kinda sorta said you had a girlfriend already, and he took that as ‘Oh, she’s dating her roommate Kate Martin’ because he said he supposedly sees you guys together everywhere.” She meant well. It really wasn’t her fault that Nick totally misread the situation.

“Oh shit.” Your jaw dropped. You thought it was awkward but now it went full fledged horrendous. You were already out, and anyone who followed your insta would’ve saw it in your stories, so you weren’t worried about that but you were worried for Kate.

“So what do we do about the fact that a random kid on campus thinks your dating Kate?”

“Ok wait, i’m actually scared. Like how do you think Kate will take it?” You were talking to Gabbie and immediately knew you fucked up by seeing the expression on her face.

“How will I take what?” Kate walked in, hair down, dressed in her practice uniform, and sat on the chair next to you. You hadn’t realized that you sat down with Gabbie. Lost in the conversation and frenzy of the new mess that could possibly affect yours and Kate’s social life dramatically.

“I’m just gonna…” Gabbie got up, and walked out, meeting the others outside on the court.

“Oh, okay. I’ll see you in a minute.” You said to the girl before turning to Kate. You had caught her up on the lore behind you and Nick, if you could even call this one sided infatuation lore. Now you just had to tell her the problem. “So Gabbie tried to tell him that I was already seeing some girl. But Nick jumped to this whole conclusion that me and you were together.”

You watched her face. Looking for any sort of negative reaction. Waiting for her to blow up on you. “Oh.”

“And when Gabbie tried to say it wasn’t you and that were just friends, and that my supposed girlfriend lives in California, he got up and left. So it may be possible that the whole Iowa college campus will assume we’re together.” You played with your fingers as you watched her some more. Still waiting for her explosion.

“I mean, I don’t mind. He sounded weird so if it keeps the guy away from you, i’m okay with being the ‘pretend’ girlfriend.” She shrugged her shoulders. Grabbing her shoes from behind you, your chair sitting right infront of the cubby that belonged to her:

“Kate. Are you sure? This is so random and so strange and I would totally get it if your uncomfortable.” You wanted it to be clear that this situation could go away if she was uncomfortable. If she was uncomfortable you’d go on a date with him and just tell him it won’t work after. It’d be bad for you if he goes around saying rude things but you couldn’t care less about people you don’t know. You just wanted to make sure Kate wasn’t the one feeling weird.

“Yeah, I mean—I don’t have to kiss you in public, right? I feel like that’s overstepping a boundary we have not thought about setting.”

“No, Kate. You do not have to kiss me in public. Wait so you’d kiss me in private?” You looked at the girl, now fully joking around as you wiggled your eyebrows and laughed.

“Oh yeah for sure.” Kate made a funny face while nodding her head before grabbing her water and standing up. You following behind to get this practice and video recording started.

“Oh, and your getting mic’d up today. I don’t know if Coach Lisa told you.” You say as you both walk onto the court.

You and Kate had showered, separately unfortunately, and sat on the couch. You had been trying to convince her the whole way home from practice to watch New Girl. She agreed after ten excruciating minutes of your nagging.

You were deciding to pick the snack you wanted, grabbing M&Ms you bought at the store yesterday, snickers, chips, and popcorn. You wanted to watch as many episodes as possible because you both started school late tomorrow and it was an off day for practice.

“What are these practices anyways? Are they like preseason workouts to get back in shape or?” You watched Kate as she picked her snacks.

“Yeah. Basically. We’re technically only allowed to goof off a little during those ones.” Kate laughed, referring to the mic’d up practice today. Coach Lisa usually wants a more focused and intimate space during the actual season. “Oh my. What if we just kill this whole tub of Neapolitan ice cream?” Kate took it out of the freezer and suddenly all your snack choices went back to the cabinets.

“Ou deal, Martin.” You grabbed two spoons before making your way to the couch. Grabbing the blanket off the backrest, and throwing it over you both. You both settled and got comfy ready to start the marathon of New Girl.

You were both sitting in silence after you decided to just do a highlight reel of episodes since you weren’t going to force Kate to watch multiple seasons. "Are you excited for this upcoming season? Your last season?" You asked as you looked to your right. Kate was seated next to you while you both decided to disregard bowls and just eat the ice cream straight from the tub. She held the tub as you both dug what you wanted out of it. She shoved more ice cream into her mouth and she smiled and nodded her head.

"I am. Just scared and sad." She said somewhat incoherently due to not having swallowed the mouthful of ice cream. You nodded your head. You had already adapted to the Kate language. When she talked while yawning, mouth full, her body language, and her facial expressions. Not many people were fluent like you, and you were actually proud to be one of the people. So you understood exactly what she meant. You saw everything else she was feeling just by the look in her eye and the shape of her lips.

But you also felt sad for her too. You’d both be a sixth-year, grad students, in a couple months. This year bigger for her more than you. This year being her last and final run in her collegiate career. This was huge. You both knew this but wanted to focus on the nicer aspects. You and the girls would support her and be her friend even if she decided to never touched a basketball again. You guys were for life.You didn’t play, so you felt there was nothing you thought you could say other than just being her friend.

"You'll be okay, sweetheart." You wrapped your arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. A small comforting hug, atleast a hug at which this position provided, and kissed the top of her head. You only used terms of endearment like this in small, comforting, intimate moments. You felt this was the right time. "I'll be here for you, and you have the girls. We’ll back you in whatever you do, outside of basketball and school. You can’t ever get rid of us if you tried. But I will give you all the support and all the ice cream you can eat right now." You smiled at the blonde. You both stared at eachother, a little too long, “We are not beating the supposed ‘girlfriend’ allegations right now, Martin.” She bursted out laughing. You not far behind.

"But seriously, thanks shortie." She said as she patted your knee, right before she lost it again and laughed out loud. You immediatey cringed at the name, and pushed her away from you.

"OH! my god! Immediately no, Kate." You laughed again, half embarassment and half amusement. "That is not funny. You sound like a frat boy." That earned another snort laugh from Kate.

"You're right. I'm sorry." You side-eyed her. Pulling the blanket a little closer to you. Scooting over the tiniest bit over to feign anger and hurt. Still managing to catch her movement through your peripheral.

"Bro, I'm not even that much shorter than you. Just short three inches." You rolled your eyes at your best friend, turning back to the episode where Jess and Nick kiss eachother for the first time. Your favorite episode.

"Yes, I know. I know how you feel about my short jokes. I almost cried when you ignored me for three and a half days." Kate chuckled as she looked to you her smile dropping, a frown forming when you still didn't acknowledge her. "Oh, come on, y/n. Don't ignore me again, please! I was kidding." She asked you while chuckling nervously, she asked you two more times, when that didn’t work she insisted on poking you for a two minutes straight.

"Okay, Kate. I forgive you. Now shush, my favorite part is coming up." You kept your eyes on the screen and tried to reach for your spoon in the tub. Your fingers reaching everywhere but your spoon. "Kate can you help me please?"

"Yes, but haven't you already seen this show like eight-billion times?" She grabbed a spoon, whichever one was closest, forgetting which one was which, and scooping a good spoonful, before bringing the spoon to your mouth. "Open." You opened your mouth and took the ice cream happily.

"Thank you, you big teddy bear. God's gift, I'm telling you." You said as you watched the best scene on sitcom TV about to unfold.

"Im just going to pretend you're talking about me and not your show." Kate whispered. "You're welcome, pretty." She said louder so you could hear.

That got your attention. It wasn’t something that you hadn’t heard come out of her mouth and directed to you before; she's called you pretty multiple times when you had asked if the outfit you were wearing out looked good or if the makeup you put on was good for this dinner a girl you were seeing on and off wanted to take you out to. But she's never once used it in this context. You got a nervous feeling in your stomach, something you recognized as butterflies for sure. Fighting the urge to smile at the compliment, a small blush creeping up on your cheeks. Fighting the thoughts you had about her.

It was something new but this one thing…this you weren't going to get used to. You guys were best friends and just roomates. You can't feel anyway about this.You decided to ignore it and take it as a compliment in the moment to make up for the short joke. It definitely wasn’t something serious as you were making.

"I was talking about both of you. The TV and you, Kit-Kate." You put your arm around her shoulder and continued to watch the show. Watching the scene you had been waiting for all night to play. “This was the best cinematic experience I have ever had.” You whispered, now reaching for the spoon again for some ice cream.

Kate beating you to it, already having got another spoonful for you, feeding it to you like she did a couple of seconds ago. You smiled and thanked her before you both decided to cut the show, and search for a movie of both your choosing this time.

#tumblrpost #writers on tumblr #kate martin #iowa wbb #iowa wbb x reader #kate martin x reader #kate martin fanfic #kate martin is so cutie #i love her so much #god i love kate martin #kate martin is indeed my gf #real #rimunagenius writes ! #fluff #sapphic wlw #wlw #and they were roommates #i love kate martin #she is my wife #i’m jus too real

[timelyicebook]

i think a lot about how clock and winner parallel ice cube and book so much and how similar they are.

book and clock

both book and clock have experienced mistreatment regarding from their respective teams. book felt mocked and neglected by match and pencil from freesmart while clock was deliberately forgotten by the rest of the losers team to the point that they forgot to recover him.

their experiences reshaped their views as a person and have tried to change to become a better person than their previous teammates. however, this leads them to accidentally project their own problems onto their new teammates, especially their close friends while unintentionally being dismissive of what their friends truly want.

book assumes that icy was facing the same problems as her, so book thought she agreed with her, but really, she was accidentally suppressing her rights. clock assumed that winner didn't like being forgotten like him, so he tries to show off winner, but ends up pushing their boundaries. which brings me to my next point...

ice cube and winner |

meanwhile, both ice cube and winner both resent the mistreatment they recieve from their previous friends.

ice cube values her own autonomy, as seen in bfdia 5a when pin assumes book was suppressing her rights to go match's dance party, and icy reaffirms that it was her choice to match's dance party, not book's.

as we've seen multiple times in the series, she also does not tolerate any form of disrespect towards her especially if they treat her as a tool or taken advantage of. if confident enough, she's not afraid to speak out if mistreated.

interestingly, as much as ice cube is a vengeful character, she'd rather walk away and refuse to address the problem rather than confront it. she'd rather move on and just distance herself as soon as possible.

winner is also like this too. as seen in tpot with two and clock, winner does not tolerate that two overstepped their boundary. they also didn't mind if clock got eliminated even after he tried to apologize for the performance incident. like ice cube, they'd rather have their space.

this is reaffirmed by winner in tpot 8 when two tries to get them to confront clock again. but winner disapproves of this because two didn't ask them permission to see clock again, thus accidentally invalidating their need for personal space. they have also expressed that they didn't like clock treating them differently because they though he was treating them like a celebrity.

winner does not want to be treated like celebrity and ice cube does not want to be treated as a tool or someone to be taken advantage of. but deep down, both of them, crave for someone who actually cared about them.

ice cube doesn't have any real friends besides bottle who actually cared about icy's wellbeing (and some of the s! team but we don't see that a lot. not including yellow face). ice cube's other true freesmart friends bubble and ruby are also not present in tpot anymore. and winner hasn't had a good friend since loser.

which is why it was important that clock explained his side of the story in tpot 10. both of them did not explain their sides of the story and that caused both of their assumptions.

once clock explained that he didn't want winner to be forgotten, winner understood and appreciates that clock was putting in that effort for them. clock understands what boundaries he was overstepping and apologizes and acknowledges that what he did was wrong.

after ice cube congratulates clock for fixing things with winner, she immediately looks back to book. keep in mind, icy was there the entire time winner and clock talked about their feelings. i think in her eyes, clock reminded her a lot of book so when she saw clock and winner, it reminded of her and book when they were friends.

perhaps ice cube did once appreciate the friendship and care she had from book. but she pushed herself away from it because like clock, book accidentally overstepped a boundary. when she finally sees book again, icy is reminded of clock that despite accidentally overstepping a boundary, clock geniunely thought he was doing the right thing for winner. perhaps, icy has realized that book was like that and has decided that if clock and winner can sort each others problems, she can try to do that with book too.

#bfdi #icebook #book bfdi #ice cube bfdi #clock bfdi #winner bfdi #winnerclock #clock and winner ran so that ice cube and book could fly #bfdia #tpot #idfb #bfb #battle for dream island

[darklight572]

"Catradora is Toxic"

Is a claim i've seen spread...heavily here, now, obviously this is disproportionate compared to the actual number of SPoP fans. This is, even if its Tumblr, social media.

Despite that, I think even folks who don't buy this interesting take could use a reminder- why exactly is Catradora not toxic?

Before we do that, we should look into: what makes a relationship toxic, how that can change, and how exactly abuse factors into all of this. Let's be clear, toxic and abusive aren't the same thing, they mean different things.

Usually "toxic" in regards to a relationships is talking about unhealthy and, sometimes, dangerous actions between folks in an relationship. For example, repeated mischaracterization. [1]

"Abuse" then speaks about when unhealthy behaviors occurs repeatedly, usually with an intent to harm the other person, and is much more actively dangerous. [1]

TOXICITY (EARLY) So then, do Catra and Adora have a toxic, or even abusive, relationship in She-Ra Princess of Power? Yes! Just not in all the instances people like to claim they do. They begin with a toxic relationship, and would delve into an abusive one toward the end of season 1 (Promise imo), then their relationship dissolves from Adora's perspective.

It starts as toxic for a number of reasons, but being brief, Adora does not fully see Catra as a person with her own autunomy but as something to protect and derive her value from. This is very much not intentional on Adora's end, but imo, Adora starts the series with a mindset with the belief that she must do acts of service to derive any value. A lot of this is expressed in her actions in the first couple of interactions she has with Catra and Shadow Weaver.

For example, choosing to leave Catra behind to find the sword even as Catra asks her to bring her. She is either: not taking Catra's abuse seriously enough, or being naive in regards to the chance of Shadow Weaver harming her for something not her fault.

Catra shows fewer troubling behaviors at this early in the case, but there are a couple- for example- when Adora asks her to come back Catra seems to disproportionately blame Adora for the violence inflicted on her. Adora is responsible for her own actions, not for Shadow Weaver's she is still a child. I want to be clear, Catra is not inherently in the wrong for being mad at Adora for not realizing Shadow Weaver was a piece of abusive shit, but shifting the blame of the abuse itself is.

If you wanna learn more about that early dynamic, I recomend Five by Five's [2] "Trilogy", "Why Adora Matters", and "Why Catra Matters". Some of my points and ideas are informed by those videos.

ABUSE (STILL EARLY) So, when and how does this become abusive? A lot of people might point out that Catra harms Adora physically pretty early in the series- I would like to point some mitigating factors in this. Catra is a CHILD, 18 at oldest, who is being repeatedly physically and mentally abused and probably violated (See: Shadow Weaver's ability to mind wipe people). It is impossible to say that Catra's seeming agreement in bringing Adora back is uncoerced.

Especially since she showed signs of leaving the Horde until she recieved seemingly safety from Shadow Weaver in some small part by becoming a Force Captain. So, in my mind, a lot of Early Catra is easily explained. We see this most clearly, imo, in No Princess Left Behind. Not only does Catra give Adora her sword back when she could: have attacked the weakened princess, pulled more alarms, etc- and it would have- at least in her mind- given her validation from Shadow Weaver.

Yet she doesn't, because while their relationship is toxic, it is not abusive at this point in time.

I think the tipping point of abuse (as mentioned previously) is Promise. This is where we see, again imo, undisputable evidence of Catra intentionally harming Adora with no seeming coercion. Letting go of her at the crevisse. Maybe she thought Adora would be fine with She-Ra, but that absolutely doesn't excuse her here. Then, the physical harm she continually perpetuates against Adora is at least- in part- uncoerced, as we see here.

MIDPOINT (ALL THE OTHER SHIT) We have to look further into Catra's abuse against Adora- and to what extent it is Catra. I think a point that too many people miss is that throughout the majority of the series Catra is in a system which repeatedly abuses her specifically, she is not just a child soldier who grew into a commander, she is one targeted uniquely by multiple of the higher ups. This does not excuse Catra's behavior, but it makes it A) more understandable, and B) less reprehensible.

So, what does she do? Mostly attacking Catra and mentally manipulating her while in battle- some of this is her trying to survive against She-Ra's enormous physical stature- but she seems to gain some amount of satisfaction from it all. Despite this, even though she has multiple opportunities to have killed Adora, she never does. This is, to be clear, a very low bar- but it does demonstrate that some claims of Catra "leaving Adora to die" are extremely overexaggerated. Adora doesn't fight particularly well in a lot of scenes, and Catra could have very easily chosen to slash her throat instead of kicking her. Catra does not want Adora to die.

One of her greatest harms is when she pulled the lever for the portal. Although, there are several mitigating factors which makes it not quite comparable to Glimmer's actions a season later. First of all, after Shadow Weaver's escape, Catra assumes Shadow Weaver's place- and Shadow Weaver is replaced by Hordak as an abuser. Second, Catra is not working on perfect knowledge, she is told it could destroy everything- by who exactly? Adora. Who she has seen consistently not recognize threats properly in the past, and has been able to outwit consistently. What she actually knows is that pulling this will hurt Adora because she didn't listen to her, to me, its unclear how much of the situation actually dawned on her.

This, again, does not excuse the situation- but it explains it. While Catra shows self-harming behavior, I don't think its at all consistent with her character to want to destroy everything- we see her contradict that with her literal every action. No, this action is much better explained as a judgement call of Adora. One of the worst actions she actually does is send Entrapta to Beast Island. While Entrapta percieves this as a "positive" later on, to Catra, Beast island is a death trap and that is her intent when she does this. This action is mitigated at least slightly by the fact that Entrapta was directly standing in her way of doing what Hordak wants. Catra knows how that ends, pain or death (through suffocation or beast island itself).

While its more than possible Entrapta could have convinced Hordak not to pull the lever (this is contentious), Catra is very clearly not thinking here. Some like to use Catra's manipulation of Hordak later on as proof she has some massive plan but uh- her plan was to nearly destroy the world then lose to Adora, and then manipulate Hordak? No- clearly she wasn't thinking, and was trying to justify herself to someone that could harm her, keeping her security. Does that make any of this right? No. But again, it provides context.

ANALYSIS (WHEN IS IT OKAY TO FORGIVE?) So, looking at ALL of this, how could there be any doubt? Catradora is toxic and abusive, the claim is correct, no? No.

Because while toxic, and further abusive, describes Catra throughout most of the series, it does not describe her throughout the ENTIRE series. And, her acts of abuse have consistently been muddled with manipulation. Earlier, I left out a small detail, even during Promise- Catra was being actively manipulated by Light Hope. Her memories were being changed, Catra is being violated. That changes a lot doesn't it? Throughout the series Catra's safety is conflated with an end-goal. Taking over the Horde with Adora, retrieving Adora for Shadow Weaver, being a Commander for Hordak.

This does not change the fact that she was abusive, but it puts Catra into a context as someone who is not necessarily doing so of her own will. Of course she grows more and more angry at Adora, in her mind, Adora is actively refusing Catra's safety. This is still a very toxic mindset, but it is a deeply understandable one considering Catra's childhood. This changes the entire dynamic Adora and Catra have. We see everything from Adora's perspective, we understand thats not her intent, and not even what she's doing. But Catra doesn't. The abuse, fundamentally, comes from a lack of perspective. [2]

So, Season 5, the biggie in the room. This is what most critics of Catradora seem to either ignore entirely or dismiss without thorough examination. Well, they also ignore all of the context of seasons 1 through 4 but i've already discussed that. Its notable that here, for the first time in a long time, Catra's power is something she knows not does not protect her. It allows her to consider her own perspective as unbiased as she has ever been able to. She is isolated from most anyone she could abuse, and the one chance she does have she chooses not to.

Here, she finally recognizes that her own perspective is rooted in a flawed understanding of their childhood. Not just from Shadow Weaver, or even from Light Hope- but from herself. This is extremely important, Catra- in realizing this- is not just taking accountability for her actions but the mindset that lead to it- and immediately takes action to correct herself. She rescues Glimmer, and in the process is violated again, this time even more severely- and is mind controlled by Prime. Adora saves her anyway. Because even abusive as Catra was, Adora understands the context that Catra was abusive in, and through her action to save Glimmer, see's the goodness in her return. As Catra couldn't kill Adora, Adora can't let Catra die.

So, Adora rescues her, Catra reacts negatively at first- but of course she does- her mind was just taken from her without her consent. But even then, Catra wants distance, asks Adora to drop her off- to isolate her. Adora refuses. This is important, too often people outside of a situation or even the perpetuator try to claim ownership of how to help the people they harmed- thats not up to them- its up to the person harmed. Adora doesn't want Catra gone, because she see's the context which shackled Catra has been- literally- eradicated. Catra proves to us that Adora isn't just being optimistic here.

As they move around, Catra ceases her violent actions against her, she barely even bickers- when she raises her voice she immediately apologizes and displays accountability for her anger. She helps save the world from Horde Prime. I think looking at Shadow Weaver's behavior creates a nice dichotomy between what someone actually changing looks like versus someone who wants to appear as changed. Shadow Weaver is still manipulative, still actively trying to get Adora to do everything she wants- and Catra- doesn't take her shit. She calls Shadow Weaver out, repeatedly sticks her own neck out against her former abuser in order to save Adora.

Catra does eventually get emotional with Adora, but there is not manipulation happening in "Heart Part 1", Catra is correct- Adora will die if she does this herself- Catra doesn't want Adora to die. Is this the most healthy way of doing this? Absolutely not, but again, they are fighting an evil space empreror. When she realizes Adora is going to die, she immediately course corrects and goes to find her, attempting to and successfully rescuing Adora from herself and Prime.

Does this make what happened before, okay? No. It doesn't. None of what I've explained here should make you dismiss what Catra did, Catra certainly doesn't, but I want you all to think about what creates the abuse and toxicity in the first place. Is Catra actually the origin? Or is she a tool for a system of perpetual power to inflict violence through. She isn't completely cleared of her part in her actions, she has choices, but in such a system your choices are limited and often coerced. Catra was actively coerced at literally every step, and had her options limited from day one. She was different, and Shadow Weaver didn't like the, even toxic, relationship she had with Adora.

Highlighting that a lot of the initial toxcitiy is from Adora helps illustrate my point more clearly, it is not Adora being a "bad person" it is the oppression of the Horde using Adora as a tool. Adora has the privilege (through the Sword and her lack of physical danger) to escape it, Catra- at least, in a safe way, didn't. Catra didn't have the power to fight off the Horde when they came looking for her, at least, she didn't think she did. What we see throughout the series is Catra trying in vein to reclaim some small amount of safety she had when she was with Adora and failing because she was playing the system's game.

Adora knows this, of course she does, thats why she's so quick to go back after Catra once she see's the glimmer of goodness in her (heh). What makes Catradora so good in my opinion, is that it doesn't just show how people who were abused can move on, but it shows how systemic oppression differs from individual abuse. Is their relationship going to be perfect at the end of the series? Absolutely not. Will it abusive? No. Not from the context we see in Season 5. Is it okay for Adora to forgive Catra? That depends on the person. Fundamentally, Catra's situation is extremely complicated, with no real analog to our real world in its entirity. We have to understand that metaphors can only go so far, I've tried to explain as much as I can, but there's absolutely nuance missing here because Etheria isn't Earth, and the Horde isn't like any massive corporation or even military on Earth.

I think, given all the context, and Catra's later repeated displays of growth and goodness- that Adora can forgive Catra. I feel, for a lot of reasons, a lot of relation to Adora. I can say, at least from my current understanding, that I would forgive Catra.

That doesnt mean my take is automatically correct, but, the continued insistence that Catradora is toxic has largely ignored a massive portion of context and development on Catra's side and seemingly completely missed the fact that some of the toxicity came from Adora before it came from Catra, and therefore missed the system ultimately responsible.

[1] "What is a Toxic Relationship." Elizabeth Scott, 2023 https://www.verywellmind.com/toxic-relationships-4174665

[2] "Five by Five Takes" Youtube Channel, Sar (Specifically Trilogy, Why Catra Mattesrs, and Why Adora Matters)

One Little last note: I have absolutely missed a LOT of things, Glimmer's actions in comparisons, some of the specifics, Catra's toxic (platonic) relationship with Scorpia- but - most of that isn't necessarily relevant to this anaylsis. What happens with Scorpia is much more complicated than Catra just abusing Scorpia, but I think the situation with Entrapta is much more poignant and relevant for what we're discussing here.

#catradora #spop catra #she ra spop #toxic catradora?

[quillkiller]

Tell me some of your quillkiller headcanons 🤲

i would love to!!!!

so i’ve talked about some of my hc’s before (while drunk…..) here and kara my beloved talked about her hc’s pretty recently here and i agree on every single thing (obviously) <3

me and kara can go on and on about them……… and if either of us say anything about them it’s pretty much always safe to say we’ve yelled about it in detal in our texts beforehand ahdhjsjdjf

so i’ll try to talk about other ones!!!!

to me, and honestly the main reason i was so drawn to them, they’re both giant man hating dykes. i love a lot of other wlw ships but most of them are always so deeply involved with their male friendships (marauders or skittles) but neither rita or bella have this/are apart of this. they’re both just manhating dykes and don’t understand why anyone would willingly form relationships with men if they don’t have to

which is interesting when it comes to bella, because she’s the one who eventually has to. she marries rodolphus, and she’s always known that even if she is a lesbian it doesn’t matter. she doesn’t have authority over her own life and she’s never even entertained the idea that she would. not even when andy and sirius leave. she just sees that as betrayal and weakness, and thinks her self sacrifice means strength.

however! bella and rita still sleep together after bellatrix gets married. it doesn’t really change anything. bella didn’t marry for love and she’s highly aware that rodolphus didn’t either. i personally don’t even think they slept together since they didn’t have children. rodolphus is just bellatrix’s husband, and in pureblood families that doesn’t necessarily or even usually involve being in love. bella is a lesbian and rita is the love of her life and letting her go simply because she has a ’husband’ genuinely doesn’t make sense to her (if u want hc’s about rodolphus go to @sugarsnappeases ……. ive been eating them up)

rita is unmarried in canon, which to me also solidifes the theory that she’s a dyke. she’s more free than bella, so she just never marries. wouldn’t even touch a man with a gun to her head

rita’s taller than bella!!! bella is the shortest black sister and i hc rita as quite tall. i’d say she’s atleast a head talled than bellatrix

ive said it before and i’ll say it again: rita is the more morally fucked up one when they first meet. bella is a small minded teenage girl with doormant dark urges. she’s always been a follower. rita is manipulative, morally corrupt sneaky, selfish and a cheat. she’ll do almost anything if it gives her what she wants. she’ll spill peoples secrets, stalk people, blackmail, threaten. bella, being a follower, devotes herself to rita like a dark knight, sees a freedom in rita that she’s endlessly drawn to.

they get together in 6th or 7th year and bellatrix is the one to kiss rita first. rita’s been pining for years but was never going to embarrass herself by showing her cards, making herself vulnerable. they’ve been friends since third year and bella sneaks into the ravenclaw common room almost every night

neither of them actually thinks it’s going to last, both painfully aware of their situations. especially bella’s. but they keep whispering empty promises to each other.

it DOES last. even though bella gets married. they’re still seeing each other, neither of them willing to stop. rita even thinks it’s enough. then bella meets voldemort and everything goes downhill from there because rita might be fucked up, but its always been for selfish reasons. for her own gain. she’s not a follower like bella— and even rita can’t follow down this path of genocide and war. she’s actually shocked to realise she has a limit

rita’s a natural redhead but spells her hair blonde. bella is the only one who knows.

bella loves buying rita things. clothes, jewellry, quills, expensive papers. rita loves recieving gifts.

they make each other laugh a lot. i know it’s a popular hc that they’re just miserable and toxic all the time, but that’s not my truth. yeah they’re both morally fucked up, but they’re happy. they make each other happy and they joke, mess around, play fight, do pranks, send each other notes in class. they’re also just teenage girls to me <3 neither of them are evil when they’re at school

their first time is out on the quidditch pitch behind the bleachers on an especially hot summer night right before summer hols. it’s nervous and gentle, trembling hands undressing each other

they’re attached at the hip at school, except for classes when they have to be apart. you almost never see them apart. to me they’ve never been enemies to loves. they’ve always been unlikely friends to lovers

some of my hc’s!!!!!! thank you for this ask i love talking about my girlies <3

#quillkiller

[scleracentipede]

I'm not a system, so I don't think I could nor should write Scarecrow with DID, but I would love to hear your headcanons. I really appreciate new view points to stuff like this, especially when it comes from someone with the condition. Please, if you don't mind educating--I'd love to hear what you have to say <3

thank you so much sending this ask - i love to talk about my system!Scarecrow headcanons and to talk about DID in general

I have a lot to say so I'm going to put it under the cut so people who just follow for art don't get a wall of text.

If anyone else in our systems wants to add their own headcanons, they'll probably add it in a reblog because, in a specfically ironic system way, we have too many thoughts on this!

DISCLAIMER: I'm just one pwDID, not a medical professional. I've been diagnosed for nearly decade years but not all systems have or want to be medically diagnosed nor does DID/other forms of systemhood manifest in the same ways for everyone. This is not a post to debate systems on or for discourse.

Firstly, does DC Comics write DID and other plurality well? No. Does DID make someone a murder? No (side eyes every DC property where they give Scarecrow or another rogue DID and an evil alter).

Scarecrow having DID would not make them evil nor should they be wrote with a evil alter. They would be a person with DID who happens to also be a bit of an evil asshole.

So headcanons:

I think Scarecrow would have not been diagnosed until after ending up in Arkham but had suspicions of it and had been working on system communication based on their own knowledge as a doctor

They experience quite bad dissocaitive amensia and other dissociation which they can find quite disabling and disorientating but as a quite quiet person tend to keep this distress to themself.

They technically have 2 co-hosts of the system who front just as frequently as each.

I think their system overall prefers to be referred to as Scarecrow as a collective name (our systems collective name is PJ or Phantoms)

Thier cohost are Jonathan (he/him), who identifies closest with thier body, and The Hessian (it/it), an introject of the Headless Horseman from Sleepy Hollow.

The Hessian was formed as a protector to cope with thier abuse growing up and tends to front when they are doing Scarecrow crimes/fighting Batman as it tends to be more confident and less nervous then Jonathan.

Hessian is alot more confident when talking to people it has a crush on then Jonathan who tends to just go non-verbal if flirted with.

Jonathan however is the one who actually makes fear toxin and is just as deadly but in a more manipulative social way (Hessian is not the most socially aware). Jonathan tended to front for their job and he is more of an ANP (apparently normal part) though still struggles with severe anxiousness.

They have a few other alters who front less often including a trauma holder little named Keeney (named after their mothers' surname, any pronouns) who only really fronts around certain other rogues and friends who they feel safe with (e.g., Harley, Jervis etc.) or when fear toxined.

I also want to say they are all definitely autistic and their singing of nursey rhymes is just a stimming and grounding technique that Hessian uses when feeling switchy.

I think as well they have one alter who identifies as a woman which caused Jonathan alot of identity crisises as when she is co-con with him.

I don't think she often tells people when she's fronting and most peole don't know her name (Raven).

She is a bit of asshole and their systems' main persecutor as in she tries to keep them safe but just pushes people away out of a fear of being hurt and repeats the abuse they recieved from their grandmother as child in an attempt to keep them 'safe' by trying to follow those unfair rules.

(Scriddler Time) Edward prides himself of learning to tell whose fronting based on subtle mannerisms (and slight changes in their accent getting stronger) and often calls them by the correct name before they've even realised whose fronting or said so themself. (They secretly appreciate his efforts it makes things so much easier).

Them and the Two Face bond over their systemhood but often make each other very switchy by accident.

I could talk about this forever but if you have any specific things you'd like to know about their system/each alters relationship with other rogues/etc. please send asks!

Thank you for asking and wanting to learn! (We've loved your writing/memes/scans for years so receiving this ask made our day thank you)

-Horror (He/They/It)

#answered #ive waited years to talk about my theories #im happy to answer any questions about DID in general if you want #scarecrow having DID could be so personal actually #(is a scarecrow introject with scarecrow special interest and only had comics as a ref for DID when we were diagnosed) #dr jonathan crane #jonathan crane #batman #scarecrow #scarecrow headcanons #jonathan crane headcanons #system headcanons #sceleraverse

[inukag]

Hello, so I'm not heterosexual (I'm ace) and as you can tell I do like one of those ships in the poll. I thought your language was very harmful. Now, I'm not here to say those characters are nice people but that doesn't mean their fans like them because they are "hetero" and just like a hot guy. They are good characters and had cool dynamics with Kagome (yes that's subjective and you might disagree with it but some people did enjoy it). I do agree that Sango should have been on the poll but there are legit reasons people enjoy darker ships or enemies to lovers trope, they can be engaging to some. So to dismiss it as just "hetero girls liking a hot guy" is very bad. The reason I'm sending you this ask is because I think you are a good person and might recieve well my comment. I considered sending an anon but I wanted you to "see" me as we talk and I hope I don't get any harassment over this from others. Anyway, thank you for reading.

First of all thank you for sending this message non-anonymously! I know it can be stressful but it is definitely better for discussions. If I see anyone sending you hate over this I will fight them personally.

When I said “this fandom is painfully straight” I did not mean “every single person who likes these ships is straight”, that would be ridiculous. But it IS a straight ship. My point is that gay ships are almost never taken seriously in this fandom, as shown by the fact that people ship Kagome with all the male characters she canonically doesn’t like before shipping her with girls that she actually likes. I find that sad. Literally the only gay ship in this fandom that has a sizable fanbase is Inu/sess, but that’s another can of worms.

I’m not here to change anyone’s mind about sess/kag or kog/kag, I’m very much a ‘ship and let ship’ person. Those ships have existed for years so I know very well that me saying “Kagome Higurashi would never canonically love these guys” is not going to change anyone’s mind. So I’ll spare you the whole rant but I’ll say that I’ve read some sess/kag stuff (Raindrops and other fanfics I found years ago) and I’ve never seen Sesshomaru portrayed as anything other than a kind, suave, gentleman who saves Kagome from Inuyasha the toxic, two timer. His canonical racism and lack of empathy for others is gone. So I have a hard time believing people when they tell me they love the ship because it’s a “sexy villain/heroine, enemies to lovers ships” lol. Anyway like I said, I’m not going to change your mind and you won’t change mine, so no need to argue about this.

Also for added context regarding the “gay ships aren’t taken seriously” issue, a couple weeks ago a bunch of people on Twitter (inukag shippers) made tweets saying they were “disgusted” by the fact that many people headcanon Moroha to be a lesbian. That her blushing at and complimenting girls is “not evidence that she’s gay” and that the “real canon” is that she will end up with Koga’s son (who doesn’t even exists in any Inuyasha media!!!). It’s not an isolated issue with Sesshomaru or Koga fans, as I pointed out the people doing this were inukag shippers and they were called out by other inukag shippers. This fandom as a whole is just not the most friendly when it comes to lgbt+ stuff.

So yeah, I have nothing else to add. I don’t see how my language was harmful if I’m being honest. Regardless of people’s own sexual/romantic orientations this fandom mostly talk about and support straight ships. This isn’t really a call to action either, I’m not telling people what to ship, I was just jokingly pointing that out and hoping that next time people would just consider the fact that gay ships exists as well.

Thanks again for the message and I’ll take this time to remind everyone following me that I use the tag #<ship/character>-critical tag when I criticize stuff, so you can blacklist that if you follow me and don’t want to see negativity about characters or ships that you love. I didn’t tag my first reblog of the poll so that’s my bad, I’ll go back and fix that.

#ask #sesshomarusamas-blog #discourse #sesskag-critical

[i-write-hurt-not-comfort]

What is Subaru and Kou's love language?

that's an excellent question and something i've thought about for kou before. and, well, that was... a challenge. i'm still not sure, so i'll start with subaru because he is nice and easy.

subaru's love language is undoubtedly physical touch.

if you google "subaru sakamaki cg" almost all of them which come up are him holding yui, hugging her or some kind of physical affection. i know all the diaboys hold and hug her etc but subaru is the clingiest motherfucker i know. he's not an acts of service, gift giver and he's not good at words of affirmative at all.

subaru ENGULFS yui at any given opportunity. and a lot of time he's not even saying a whole lot, just holding her. clingy bastard.

even in the non-story games, here he is hugging her again. he's not biting her, not hurting her. not trying to do anything sexual... just, feeling her touch.

then some cute kissing <3

there's also the times he both gives comfort and recieves comfort from physical touch. i especially love the second cg here, he looks so... happy like that ;;

okay, onto kou... ah,

now with kou i did struggle. i think the first thing that comes to mind is gift giving because of how adament he is on "give-and-take" but giving gifts and expecting something in return vs giving gifts out of love are... very different.

and the thing is, once kou is in love with yui and has kind of changed his toxic worldview, i don't recall him showering her with gifts anyway. while kou is quite materialistic himself (splashing out on expensive clothes, watches etc) i don't think it's out of love. plus if we remember in dark fate, when there's the flashback of yuma giving him a sugar cute out of love and kou... genuinely does not understand how that could correlate. so i don't think it's gift giving despite what it may seem on the surface.

furthermore, i don't think kou really cares much about acts of service besides being cooked for. he doesn't go out of his way to do things like that for yui. quality time? i don't think so, especially since characters like shu and kanato really DO rely on her being around to show and recieve their love. kou does get on with his own thing and while there's some cute bonuses scenarios where they shower together or kou crawls into her bed, i don't think that's his love language.

(i love these ones so much)

so with gift giving, quality time, acts of service and physical touch out of the way (because he's just not as clingy as subaru, i don't think kou's love language is physical touch either), that leaves words of affirmation.

and i thought about it, and i think kou's language actually is words of affirmation.

the main things i thought about were the blue sky metaphor - the most important thing he ever said to yui, in my opinion, is "you're my blue sky"

... in this beautiful scenes where he's crying! i think having the magic eye probably distanced kou from this for a while but he only learns how to trust and love again by believing yui's words of affirmation to him (yui's love language is words of affirmation too, definitely). if words of affirmation weren’t his love language, i don’t think the magic eye would’ve been as important as it was. but he wanted to hear the feelings he was reading in her mind.

i don't know, but after their relationship grew healthier, kou was definitely faster to tell yui exactly what he loves about her. he likes compliments, we know that, and he's working in an industry where he's showering with compliments on a daily basis.

kou took time to show his love language i think, simply because he didn't know how to love or be loved.

but he gets better at telling yui exactly how much he loves her.

and the one other thing which leads me nicely onto subakou...

in lost eden when yui asks kou to cheer subaru up, what does he do? he decides to talk to him, give him so verbal reassurance that everything is okay. and the fact he managed to make subaru smile, idk, kou looks so happy with himself.

so, subakou...

i think there would be some challenges actually, because subaru is really bad at words of affirmation. it takes like 4 games to actually tell yui how he feels and then in lost eden he waits through a lot of suffering to actually tell yui what good she’s done for him. yui tries to talk to him with words of affirmation and generally subaru isn’t good at receiving that. 

because kou is pretty bad at trusting people anyway, i think he’d struggle with subaru not telling him how he feels. especially if kou tells him something he loves about him and subaru doesn’t say anything back. i think they’d have to have a serious conversation where subaru explains he’s just not good at receiving or giving compliments. 

on the other side, i think kou would be pretty good at receiving subaru’s clingy self and he’d definitely be up for cuddles. eventually i think he’d come to learn that subaru does love him and he is showing that in his own way, but i also think kou would try really, really hard to get subaru to deliver words of affirmation. 

i think the first time kou tells subaru that he is his blue sky, subaru would be so confused and i think kou would be a little offended by that. 

it’d take a while, but i think they’d get there eventually. imagine them just lying in bed together, telling each other the things they like about each other, subaru is blushing madly and kou is snickering the whole way through. then they kiss, aww... i wrote something similar for elliot and leo in pandora hearts and i should definitely write a subakou rendition. 

if anyone has any different ideas about kou’s love language please tell me because this was a STRUGGLE.

#diabolik lovers #subaru sakamaki #kou mukami #subakou #ask #anon

[thatblondeperson]

Hello. Longtime Tim and Steph fan who discovered your blog and I really enjoy your meta takes/askes on them. Concerning your recent ask I was curious as to why you think it was poorly written that Tim felt he couldn't explore himself with Steph and you are not a fan of how Meghan framed things as "Tim not being fully himself". I hope this isn't coming across as a complaint against Tim's current direction or anything given questions you have recieved come across as such.

I want to preface this, for anyone reading, that REMINDER! Tim at the very least has all his pre Ew52 memories. Please keep this in mind as Meghan seems to not have these memories.

My first issue is that it's a lack of attention to canon. The whole reason Tim started crushing on Steph was because she was someone that he felt like he could finally be himself with. He loved Ari, but he had to hide Robin from her, and that was a major block for him with her. It caused Ari to stray from him and even court other guys while they were dating.

With Steph, he couldn't be Tim per say, but to Tim, Robin was an extremely important extension of himself. When he was Robin with Steph, he was being fully himself, and he loved being with her for that reason.

Identity reveal being stolen by Bruce aside, at least after that we got to see the part of their relationship that I love, where we get to see them build this very lovely trust with one another. Tim and Steph share things with one another throughout their relationship that they don't share with others. They are both exploited by Bruce in ways that only they can understand, Tim may be the only person that Stephanie has openly shared her SA story with, they have a lot of pain they've processed together. They weren't always great with communication as they both have their own internal conflicts going on, but when they did open up, they were 100% with one another, and there was a very beautiful strength they both shared.

Let's not even get into Eternal and Rebirth. That's @incoherentbabblings jurisdiction but there is so much more evidence to both of their "I can be fully myself with you" dependence on one another.

This thing where Tim doesn't feel like he can be his full self with Steph either feels like a dismissal of canon, or that we are just rewriting the TimAri breakup which we very well could be doing. We're hitting the same points basically. And to say it's a dismissal of canon isn't crazy far off considering that Meghan says Steph was never trained by Batman which TIM AT LEAST IS VERY AWARE ISN'T TRUE. At least she mentions that Steph was trained by Canary and Cass but like...come on. Even Tim trained her. A LOT of people trained Steph and Bruce was a fairly important one in that mix.

The second reason this frustrates me is just the classic trope of "a guy can't be bisexual of he's in a relationship with a girl" bullshit that a lot of bi guys face. And of course women face this too. The biphobis of needing to be in a same sex relationship for people to recognize you as bi or even care that you're bi. It's the way the story is always told, and it gets exhausting after a while. Bi people typically aren't validated unless they've actually "tried" both, or are currently with a same sex partner. Will I always wonder what could have been if Tim came out as bi and still stayed in a relationship with Steph? Sure. Because it wouldn't have made his coming out any less valid, but I don't think media tends to share this sentiment.

I have answered asks about how trust is hard even with someone you've always loved and trusted, because peeling back another layer of yourself could change everything. I've mentioned how Tim probably felt that this was the right path for him, and it's clear that he is happy with Bernard and that this ch is good for him. I 100% believe that I'd he came out to Steph while still in a relationship with her, knowing her character, that she would be very accepting and they would have carried on just fine. (because also obvi she's bi too. bi4bi TimSteph when, DC?)

But I have to keep putting my view of the story through Tim's eyes and remember that love and trust and all that gooey stuff looks different to those experiencing it, and Tim's vision of his past and future relationships aren't going to be as clear as my vision of them.

I'm not thrilled that it's all taken this route, but I do understand it and I'm happy enough with it.

#timsteph #timber #tim drake #stephanie brown #bernard dowd #personal #ask tbp

[whaledocboi]

“You have fangs now. Appropriate.”

“Sister Camila, I apologize for the intrusion. I’m just dropping off some data I’ve gathered, though I don’t know if it will be useful.”

“That’s what your apologizing for? And we don’t need your data. You and your data can go to hell.”

Camila throws a left hook. Lilith rolls with the punch, but it still breaks Camila’s hand. Later, when describing it to Yasmine, Camila will tell her it was like punching living metal. In the moment, it just makes Camila even more angry.

Lilith dodges the rest of her blows, clearly so Camila doesn’t further injure herself. It takes some effort on Lilith’s part.

“Camila! Carry yourself.”

Camila spins to rebut Mother Superion’s order but doesn’t speak at the look on Suzanne’s face. When Camila spins back Lilith is gone; only the data, the slight smell of sulfur where she used to be.

IN THE BACK OF MY MIND, YOU DIED, AND I DIDNT EVEN CRY, NO, NOT A SINGLE TEAR- thank you anon, amazing

she doesnt understand. they used to be friends, right? they've had conversations just fine, lilith had been quite nice, we can almost call it friendly. of course she always had her edge, but it was different, this is different. its like they've gone back to base 0, where camila the brand new recruit and lilith is annoyed by here mere existence, gladly beating her into the ground, not even sparing a glance.

she's been like this with everyone though. not speaking to beatrice, constantly picking fights with mary and borderline trying to kill ava (yeah, maybe camila doesnt have it the worst after all). and it feels stupid and childish, but she cant help it. she wants an explanation, an apology or just lilith to tell her she got it all wrong and they've never had anything, that they've never even been friends. she wants Something, instead of the constant cold shoulder she gets.

it gets worse after the incident, and at first camila cant be too mad about it, how could she, lilith actually died and then came back, she deserves a break from her resentment. but nothing changes, she still seems to be simply an annoyance in her eyes ("i request silence." - understandable, but it still stings) and combining this with the stress of their mission was just a ticking bomb waiting to explode.

"sister camila" do we not know each other? did we meet yesterday? say something, anything instead of half baked formal instructions or eyerolls. - but she never says any of these again. she tells herself its because she doesnt want to agitate lilith even further and break the already fragile team dynamic. (definitely not because she's afraid of what answer she might recieve) that one time, she got ahead of herself, it wasnt wise, but the anger and frustration got better of her. it wont happen again.

lilith wants to treat her like colleagues who barely tolerate each other, fine, fine, she can do that.

#IN THE BACK OF MY MIND I KILLED YOU AND I DIDNT EVEN REGRET IT I CANT BELIEVE I SAID IT BUT ITS TRUE #I HATE YOU #poor little mentally ill miscommunicating dudes #who dont know how to operate normal human relationships #thank you anon once again #camilith #ask

[justtryingsblog]

Snow white

With the recent talk about Disney and their making of the live action of Show white and all the hate that they have been recieving I just can't help myself but think about it. I usually don't talk about my opinion on movies and stuff like that with anyone, but I thought why not, I use this blog to talk about my thoughts anyways sooo...

The most hate comes from the way the acress handless the interviews. And white watching them I can't help but think how weird they are. From the expressions she makes to the tone she uses and topics she talk about all of it just feels kind of off.. Now there's nothing wrong with that, but considering she is the literal main role of the movie, she might want to consider what things to say out loud and what things to keep for herself.

Things like this don't only effect the way people view the acress after but also peoples view on the actual movie. So in result Disney gets a lot of hate that could have been easily avoided.

Another thing people hate is the casting of the movie. Now yes, in a lot of movies, how the person looks, won't effect the avtual movie. Like the little mermaid live action. Yes, it wasn't what people expected, but the way ariel looked wasn't so important for the story line. Ariel was mostly known for her red hair and bam they gave us that..I haven't watched the full movie yet so I won't comment on it any further but the parts of the movie that I did see seemed good...Anyways back to the point. Why does the way Show White look matter? Well because that's literally one of the main points of the movie. In the very begging of the story it's said that she was named Show white because her skin was white as the snow... With the casting the movie has now it just dosen't make sense.

There's nothing wrong with modernising movies and stories. It's been done before in amazing ways. But why change the story so much that it dosen' t make any friking resemblance to the original. Why call it something that people have known for years and years but that change it so much, just make a diffrent movie with a diffrent name.

Many of us grew up with the Grimm stories, many of people grew up with the old original Disney movies, and for all of us finding out what is happening to our favorite stories just breaks our hearts. There's already so many versions of Snow White out there that change the original story, we just want to see the amazing friendship and love story that we first fell for...

There's so much more to talk about, but these's are just some of the main points that have been on my mind lately... That is all.. Peace ✌️

#show white #disney #blogging

[sweetescapeartist]

Update Again...

I'm getting my mind where it needs to be. Controlling my emotions of anger and sadness. Anger from my mistakes I made that I didn't realize were mistakes until years later. Sadness from realizing close friends were never my friends because they abandoned me when I needed them, but wanted me to be there for them. Anger from allowing myself to be manipulated into making decisions that ended up isolating myself which resulted in being abandoned by so-called friends of my past & so-called friends of my present. Dealing with the sadness of being alone with nobody who understands what I went through mentally nor emotionally. I've told some family and they can't really comprehend it. So I just navigate life mainly on my own to generate my own happiness. And I can do so at will. Just sometimes it takes more effort and time to give myself a natural high. Even with how I walk now, ppl tell me I walk like I own wherever I'm at. Its just confidence I can't contain. Not overconfidence. That opens you up for failure, and makes you too delusional to realize or admit it. It's worse than lacking confidence at times. Balanced confidence is the key. It keeps your mind & spirit at peace too.

But currently, I've gotten myself to a better place more often. So now I can focus more on my art. Drawing a few things for family and I plan to draw a family portrait of my dad & his siblings & their mother & her parents. I want to give them something to always remember.

After 2 projects for family are done, I will return to K18 art. Then I will start selling my merch in real life and set up that elusive Patreon for my DB fanart I keep talking about lol. I have a more focused mind after finding out I'm pretty much along and realizng that's not necessarily a bad thing. So with this mind that has more focus than before, I can build towards the potential I have. Potential to become an artist that is known in my area. And the many DB ideas I have that can impact the fandom in a positive way for use Krillin fans, K18 fans, & Earthling fans. I have real drive now. I just have to keep focused and keep fighting off these negative vibes that sneak up on me. I create my own barrier of positivity to counteract the negative energy of others. And with my positive energy as high as I have it, negative energy cannot bring me down like it used to & my energy can actually elevate others.

I also been working on fics, have recieved submissions that would like to remain anonymous, & so on. Those of you who are on the discord... sorry for my lack of interaction as I said to y'all there. But also thank you for continuing in my absence. You all have helped each other grow in positve ways from what I noticed. And like I said long ago, I just need to be a spark while others become flames. But I think its time I catch up to y'all and become a flame myself so we can refine an intelligent section of this fandom with our fire.

Thank y'all for putting up with me. Sorry for neglecting to respond. I've done that for a while these past 2 or 3 years because I've been going through stuff and going through changes. I've had to get myself more balanced so I can move forward at a steady pace. I'm not quite where I need to be, but I'm getting close.

[kickingupdust]

Virtual Diary Entry #14

Oct 12, 2022. 

Today is the anniversary of my best friend’s death. Today was not as hard as the first one. Definitely not as hard as the day she left. It’s easier to deal with when I think of all of the hatred and anguish of the material world and know that she did not deserve to be subject to any more of it. She is genuinely better off where she is. Grief rises from a place of selfishness, self-servitude. Desire. The desire for one more chance, one more opportunity to set things right, one more look into their eyes, one more laugh, one more awkward silence, another note of her voice. 

I do still wish she was here, I do battle the selfishness that comes with loss. With each passing year, with each butterfly that lands on me at an opportune moment, I feel less desire for her return. However, I love her. I always did and I always will. And losing her love is one of the biggest plights I will face in this lifetime. 

That’s enough about that. The more I think about it, the worse it gets. That’s why it has become easier over time, because I just deny any passage to the thoughts. I think that is really the only way. 

Oct 13, 2022

I’m so sorry that you have to have a body. One that doesn’t know what’s best for it. One you try to trust, but no matter what, you just can’t know it well enough. Cannot tend its needs well enough. I wish for nothing more than to unite the head and the heart. 

I wish I could show myself the love I so desperately crave. But, I want it from someone else. I want it to be materialized. Hugs and kisses. I cannot give myself those things. Surprises, flowers on the counter when I get home. Little things. Remembering my coffee order.

I wish someone wanted me. I’m normally just kept around for what I can offer, not because someone actually loves or cares for me. But I’ve got an angry heart. 

I know I can never be loved at this rate. I am not a courageous person. Determined, maybe. But what it really takes is courage. 

I think I am still missing my late friend. I think about how different I felt then. I won’t pay it too much mind though, that is just asking to be sad. 

I’m not even really sure what to talk about. Type about? 

I feel really annoying. Like I’m a sore on a beautiful woman’s face. 

That doesn’t even make much sense. I just feel really undesirable. Like a loser. I feel unworthy of love but at the same time I know I am wonderful and could offer the best love a person has ever recieved. I’m just crazy. 

Maybe it’s better to be alone. So I don’t have to put anyone through this. Or keep putting myself through it. 

I just wish for so much. I know the good will come to me someday. I have tried acting in the best interest of all, not just me. I’m working on that though. I am still extremely selfish and self serving. I have emotional reactions to things. I don’t always tend the things I need to be tending. 

I am really sick of feeling this way. I sometimes wonder what it’d be like to just be someone else for a day. I often wish I could have a little break where I did just that. 

When I was younger I had this grand scheme to just buy a bus ticket and get the fuck. I realized after numerous haircuts and eyebrow shapes that I have a very moldable face, one that is easily disguised. I wanted to run away and change my identity. Maybe be homeless. Maybe walk to another country. Chris McCandless style. 

I probably would’ve ended up on heroin, assaulted, and dead. 

I always thought it was probably better for me in the long run that I got pregnant as a teenager. It kept me from doing alot of stupid shit. Not all stupid shit, because I still do stupid shit. Just not as stupid as I was. Like dropping acid under a train bridge. I mean that was a pretty cool experience but it was not a smart thing to do. 

The dumbest thing I do these days is look for love. It exists within me and all around me, yet I still seek it as if my life is completely devoid of it. I just miss having someone to love I guess. I don’t really even know what it is. The people I have loved and do love have a really hard time accepting love from me due to my volatile nature. Its entirely my fault. Written in the stars that I would struggle and be difficult to others. I know I deserve good things as much as the next person, it’s just hard to feel like I do. Deep down I don’t think I do. But on the surface I affirm to myself that plenty of bad people have experienced so much good, and it makes me jealous, and it makes me say I deserve it all the same as them. That doesn’t make sense, does it. 

Doesn’t matter. Nothing really does. I could keep being an idiot in love forever if I wanted. And in general. I just need to focus on my career. I know that won’t bring me much happiness but it’ll be a step toward having my own place and I know that would make me happy. Getting to exert full control over an environment, I know it’d serve my control freak ass well. 

I wish I was carefree. 

FUCK?

Stop wishing for shit, dude. I need to be happy with what I have, I have so much. I have so much more than I could’ve ever gained on my own, and it’s all been with the help of others. What happened to graciousness, my man? 

I stopped biting my nails. I’m really grateful for that. I’ve gotten better at painting my nails. Me and my sister are great friends. I cut off and blocked all my ex’s. I have a nice shiny laptop to use for school next semester. I got granted money to go to school. I have a place to live. I have groceries in the house, plenty of food. I have clean water for drinking and showering. I have 2 really cute dogs. I have an awesome son, he’s a hellcat but I know he’ll be great one day. He’s already great, I just mean I see him capable of doing great things. He is so smart. 

I have a bunch of colorful pens, all the art supplies a starving artist could want. I have friends. I have both my parents still. I have one set of grandparents left. I have a TV in my room. I have a spotify subscription that comes with Hulu. I’m surrounded by beautiful scenery every day. Butterflies, trees, gentle wind and good weather. I have plenty to be grateful for and somehow I still dwell on the one thing I don’t have, a partner. 

Give it up. From now on I need to come and type all the reasons why I’m fine the way I am. And how being with someone won’t make anything any better. About how I make myself miserable instead of just accepting my beautiful life for what it is and being okay with it. 

Realistically I know I won’t do that but it’s a nice thought. I can’t wait to go back to school and try half as hard as I’m capable of. I’m ready to ditch the perfectionist tendencies.

#infj thoughts #infjproblems #journaling #online diary #self healing #virtual diary #infj feelings #infj #mbti #tw depressing stuff #sorry for being depressing #healing #self worth #self help #self compassion

[wouldnt-it-be-hilarious-if-i]

currently listening to: pussy is god by king princess

the thing about writing smut is the fact that as a person, the only thing i can write about from specific experience is the feral aspect of anything related to subspace

when i write characters who are more bottomish, i try to involve a lot of holding back in the first part of the scene. a lot of not wanting their partner to win, a lot of not wanting to appear as needy as they are, showing eagerness but not the amount that they will show later

and inevitably not only failing, but actually making it almost impossible for them to hold back when they do, eventually, open up.

and the feral aspect doesn't mean they suddenly become dominant

it means they suddenly become significantly more compliant, or even worse than they were before. it's like something in their eyes changes, and there is a very clear shift where you can tell that if you asked them to do something very insane

like something that their normal thinking brain might usually be not completely interested in, they're suddenly ready to do it just because you asked

and every thing about their behavior shifts

there's like this desire to not just be with their partners, but to belong to their partner, to physically be a part of them, to be so close that they're almost under their skin

and i won't out right say that im getting all of this from my personal experience or my personal behavior but...uhhhh

anyway

so when i write my more sub characters, i try to think of the most feral girl behavior possible and write that

and when i'm writing this for other people, i try to make them feel feral too. it's not just about making them feel like the characters are enjoying themselves, the readers themselves have to feel and taste and fully experience every single movement from the dom in the story. it's holding back the amount of information they recieve at once, letting them read the hottest scenes and then pausing the moment to explain something slightly unrelated to the present moment

describing the devotion, or the hate, or the rage, and mixing it carefully with the very human arousal and attraction

so when i write these types of scenes, i try to go back through and really capitalize on the parts that make me gasp in surprise when i hear it read aloud, or the parts that make me grip something or blush when showing it to a friend. if i can't feel the description in my legs, it's not good enough.

so, for example, one of my favorite first indicators of this is involving a moment where the subby character is on her hands and knees, where her face is being caressed and the descriptions involve her breathing heavily but trying very hard to lower the amount of inhale/exhales through her mouth, or her eyes being very alert, her body extremely tense as she awaits the next move, and when the hand begins to move

she wraps her lips around their thumb, she stares up at them, maybe she grips her skirt or crawls closer, maybe she rests her head on their lap. all of this tells you she is begging, but there is no immediate dialog coming from her

i like to include a lot of humanity in these stories too. like it's not just about sex, especially in stories with characters who love each other. dom's don't know everything, no matter what literotica tries to sell to you. sometimes, they forget things, or sometimes funny things happen. and sometimes subs might get overwhelmed and have to stop, or something.

sometimes minds wander during sex, or sometimes people are a bit playful, or sometimes there is a moment where one or both of them needs a moment to rehydrate or be held. or sometimes life happens and it can be a great oppurtunity to involve it in the overall smut.

like in one of my fics, the thunder was so loud that the other character's claws (she's a werewolf, but human throughout the fic because i did not want the story to reach furry territory) extended, causing her to scratch the other. given the personality of both characters, there were two reactions:

the one scratched the other worried and tried to clean it up by wiping it up with her finger, and the one who was scratched very calmly put that finger in her mouth, which made both characters a tiny bit feral. (i read something similar to this somewhere and i was like oh my god that is so fucking hot, i have to figure out a way to include that in my stories)

that sort of stuff.

im definitely not a perfect writer, but i really work hard to make my smut feel like a tactile experience rather than a visual one.

[autisticbillpotts]

dont want to be a human with a job, dont want to sleep, want to think about fictional characters

idk if tbs is going to end up having the sticking power in my head for me to consider it a special interest but hoo boy am I thinking about nothing else right now ! like uh to the point Ive had to stop myself a couple times cause I realised I was getting so intense about it I was driving towards a panic attack lol ✌️

torn completely between actual thoughtful analysis and just being like :3 caleb drinks green tea with honey + has anger issues hes just like me fr

but also it makes me insane Ive been thinking a LOT about how the characters treat damien especially in contrast to how rose and caleb also having manipulative abilities is percieved like its the whole thing about only respecting neurodivergent people if theyre nicey-likable-personable. rose immediately ditching damien even though he doesnt even have his powers anymore simply on the word of strangers is completely fucking mental to meeee every time joan calls someone a psychopath I get sooo mad like what! shes a therapist.. BUT ALSO deeply compelling fucked up way for people to behave and like I get it but also! I get him! I want to be his friend. also helens

Ive genuinely been enjoying tct less than the main show because there are noooooo women in it. despite the fact that I just did a caleb-eps-only relisten and that hes my favourite little guy and it does make me dizzy levels of giddy. but theres no women! complete turnaround from the immensely invigorating fucked up dynamic in tama between sam/joan/helen/anabelle that shit was SO good. even if I did spend the whole thing waiting for them to acknowledge that It Was All Joans Fault cause that would have made it all extra fucked up. SO much fun listening to variously traumatised and stressed out women play mind games and fuck each other over love that.

okay new train of thought I have not been able to stop thinking about caleb + perception since I started listening which ffjdjv was only a month ago whoop. but the way he sees himself vs how strangers vs his friends see him (and then now Im thinking about how thats changed in tct which I am actually not finished with yet) but like! loner who avoids parties and doesnt have any friends vs star athlete vs literal empath vs Meathead vs the big brother vs how adam talks about him vs Jock vs Nice Young Man vs ARGH I love him

also I love joan. shes soooo fun and also hot like hi dr bright r u single I like ur morals warped by recieving the approval youve sought ur entire life and ur single minded dedication to protecting people + inability to prioritise around that devotion. I like when she is catty and mean with people and ALSO when she is being very silly and smart. teasing sam and the balance in her relationship with vanessa and also the uh zachvalenticharacter episode. and her rage. LOVE her rage. and that shes silly and obsessive and scientifically minded and likes musicals and puzzles and how hard it is for her to turn off therapist brain. shes so so good I like when she does bad things because she Just Wants To Help but forgets other people are people when shes too focused on something.

my brains stopped working now Im stopping this post here. at some point I will become capable of eloquence Im sure

actually no do you hear me damien cant trust any interaction he has with another person do you hear me!!! hragh

#personal #tbs blogging

[kodzimon]

the lady of the lake; katherine

#i see now that im really going into a mote arthurian type #but i do not care :) #my brain has been rolling these out recently #and originally i was gonna have sarah be the lady of the lake #but then changed my mind because i want her to actually recieve #sarah is also going to be a knight #because i said so #and theyre going to be in love #also because i said so #newsies broadway #newsies #livesies #newsies fanart #art #newsies musical #newsies movie #simon back on his bullshit #artists on tumblr #katherine plumber

[caro-bug]

Ok the time has come

If you are a diehard Raiden fan or won't take me criticising Genshin for some other reasons, plz skip this post, because It's gonna be one hell of a Rant.

Don't get me wrong, I love Genshin and I'm not planning to quit it or something, but criticism must be given.

And that being said...

GENSHIN 2.1 STORYLINE WAS VERY, VERY BAD

And here's why:

Barely any playable characters were given any depth in this version. They were all treated just like plot devices.

Especially Yae Miko, who was there just to explain everything to our dumbassess and and give us an axcess to the power of ambition and friendsip I guess

Kokomi and Gorou? Nahhh, why give them any actual spotlight, if they were there only to deliever the schocking news that Fatui gave dellusions to the resistance? We might've as well learned that from some random soldier NPC and it would make little to no difference.

Speaking of delusions, don't Kokomi and Gorou fight on the front line? HOW THE HECK did they not notice that all of their visionless soldiers suddenly can use the power of elements? Did everyone hide it from them and everyone actually succeeded? Wasn't Kokomi weired out buy th sudden improvement of the whole resistace? How the heck did none slip up? WHY DIDN'T KOKOMI OR GOROU CHECK OUT THESE "WEAPONS" BEFORE GIVING THEM TO THEIR SOLDIERS? THEY COULD HAVE BEEN BOMBS OR SOMETHING

Also the fact that Kokomi just made us a general without giving us time to get to know how resistance works, or that she would give Teppei promotions just because he asked was extremely stupid. Not a master strategist move for sure. We could be a spy. Kokomi didn't even aknowledge Teppei until he asked her for a promotion.

Overall the whole resistance arc was extremely rushed and basically almost useless. If it was wisely prolonged, this update could be spread between two versions no problem. We could have had more quests where we and Teppei would slowly climb up the ranks, get to know more about Kokomi, ACTUALLY FIND OUT STUFF ABOUT EI AND SCARAMOUCHE INSTEAD OF LETTING YAE INFO-DUMP IT ON US.

Kazuha was ok I guess, but he was given very little screentime, and as my friend (a big Kazuha fangirl, mind you) noticed, that his whole arc revolves around Tomo and he barely has any personality besides grieving his loss, which is dissapointing.

I'd rather see him actualy join the resistance and face Ei not because he randomly appeared to save us, but because he was banished from Inazuma and had the courage to return.

Speaking of random appearances, why were Kazuha and the resistance at Tenshukaku anyway? Like, hear me out: Last time they've seen us alive was when we declared we would find the dellusion factory. So unless Yae told them we were here, they had no right to know (and if she did, how would that help?) And if they ACTUALLY thought that they could raid Tenshukaku, why do that right after their army recieved such a big blow, and with so little men? Besides the fact that Kazuha Conviniently managed to save us, it was all just an unnecessary bloodshed.

And Ei... Oh my god, I'm sorry, but the way they did her was such a mistake.

She basially went through the same thing as Venti and Zhongli, but was the only one to chose violence.

When we tell her that her people are suffering she's like "yeah, I know, so what?" But then we defeat her with what's basically a power of friendship and she's like. "Ok, I'll stop the decree I guess" and in her story quest she suddenly wants the best for her people? Oh no I know you don't.

She could have been the actual victim of The Fatui's plot. Imagine if Sara was actually collaborating with the Fatui and when we told her about them "manipulating" Ei she'd say she's gonna tell her but would actually go to backstab her before she realises the truth. Or if the "you've changed, you're getting weak" line would be what Scaramouche said to Ei after he defeats her.

Or, she could be an ACTUAL villain. The one that isn't forgiven just because she buys some dango milk and pulled a sword out of her boobs. She's a tyrant and there's no denying it. So why didn't she die to get what she desserved? Why didn't she get any actual redemption, or make some sort of sacrifice to show that she wants well for Inazuma after all? She could face the consequences of her wrongdoings and see the death she caused or experience the wrath of the people she hurt but noooo, her people already forgave her and are concerned for her health! But she's just being angsty, so let's go on a peacefull stroll and show her some horny light novel people wrote about her <3 Like come on, really?

Like seriously, if Mihoyo had the guts to actually call her evil, that would barely infulence her popularity. People simp over well-written villains like crazy. Well-written villains rule.

I'm honestly worried about how The Tsaritsa will be handled...

But okay, okay. To lighten up the mood, here are some things that I liked about this update:

Teppei, duh.

Watatsumi Lesbians.

Sara. Oh dear, oh dear, gorgeous. Once again, she proved herself to be an honorable person. We've seen her admit that she was doubtful about the decree. We've seen her world being shattered as she realised what her family did. We've seen her put away her selfless devotion to do what's right. My hot tengu gf, I absolutely love you and your writing so far.

Scaramouche has more interesting backstory and motivations than hid creator. He's the villain we deserve. He has the gnosis and he's yet to cause some drama, so hopefully he fixes this hell of an arc.

Thoma didn't have much screentime, but I like how they touched the topic of how it's hard for him to stay in hiding

Sayu was cute and fit into the story nicely.

ANGRY TRAVELER YES. They spoke. They were pissed. They were traumatized by witnessing Signora's death, even though they hated her. They see that the gods are nothing to mess with, they're changing, they're becpming just like their sibling. YES, YES, YES.

The fact that Raiden somehow "marked" us to attack us when we join the resistance army was cool and relflected her elemental skill really nicely.

#genshin impact #caro talks #genshin 2.1 #genshin rant #raiden shogun #raiden ei #beezelbul #yae miko #guiji yae #kaedehara Kazuha #thoma #Scaramouche #kunikuzushi #kujou sara #la signora #aether #lumine #balladeer #sayu #teppei #sagonomiya kokomi #gorou