#christian-jewish families

[homoqueerjewhobbit]

I'm allowed to make this joke, but I love that Jewish death rituals are like:

"Pfeh, for what should I spend $12,000 on a big fekakte box they see only for five minutes before they cover it with dirt?"

"Don't waste my good suit what might fit my nephew Lev if the bum should ever even try to get a real job!"

"Embalming? Don't mind me, I'll rot in the dark."

#There is standardized Yiddish transliteration and I fart in it's general direction #Anyway Jewish ritual plain box simple shift closed casket no embalming #Spend money on bagels for after #There are a lot of prescribed behaviors for how to behave at the Shiva (mourning house calls) #My family observes none of them. We treat it like a family reunion #If you want all my petty family funeral drama though maybe a different post? #But seriously Christian funerals are such a huge scam. Taking advantage of people at their most vulnerable. #If you have an iron stomach go read about what happens to a corpse when it decays in a vacuum sealed coffin #Death #Death rituals #Judaism #jewish #Jumblr #Jew stuff #post o' mine #Clearing out the drafts #Offensive Yiddish accent clichés are for Jews only. #For this we came to America? To get made fun of on the feygele website by our great grandchildren?

[tomicscomics]

01/05/2024

"If you cannot afford a lamb, one will be appointed to you."

___

JOKE-OGRAPHY: 1. Joseph continues reading about Jewish law from his brochure (continued from last week's cartoon).  In Jewish tradition, the sacrifice for a newborn boy was typically one yearling lamb (for the sin offering) and one turtledove (for the burnt offering).  As Mary and Joseph discuss this, the Holy Spirit (a dove, but not for sacrifice) shows up to give a knowing glance at Baby Jesus.  You see, Jesus is called the "Lamb of God," and His mission is to be sacrificed for our sins, so it's ironic that His parents are required to sacrifice a lamb for HIM under Jewish law. 2. A few commenters last week were concerned about Mary and Joseph sleeping too close together in their blanket fort, as it challenges the perpetual virginity of Mary (a core Catholic belief).  I argue that Mary and Joseph are a poor married couple sleeping in a barn that's open to the cold and creatures of nature, so the chaste and honorable Joseph would probably stay near his Holy Family for their protection, instead of sleeping apart and leaving them vulnerable.  No scandal here! 3. A few commenters last week argued about the perpetual virginity of Mary (the belief that she remained a virgin after Jesus's birth; a belief held by the early Church even before the Bible was canonized).  I just wanted to say that I'm thrilled and honored that my comics appeal to people of all religions, including other Christian denominations.  It moves me every time I get a comment from someone who isn't Catholic but loves my work.  That said, I AM Catholic, so please understand that my comics follow the canon of Catholicism when I can help it.  No hard feelings.  Of course, you're all welcome to continue giving me suggestions and debating in the comments (good-naturedly, of course).  I've learned so much by listening and looking into your apologetics.

#catholic #christian #jesus #comic #cartoon #catholic memes #jesus memes #christian memes #tomics #bible #nativity #jewish law brochure #mosaic law #sacrifice #lamb of god #holy spirit #baby jesus #holy family #blessed virgin mary #saint joseph #mother mary

[blinkpen]

brother lost his points

he was just trying to covert me to Christianity at my most vulnerable

never fucking mind

#He means so well I know but Dude my biggest traumas rn are Bevause of Christianity and the fucked up #Dynamics going on with n this once Jewish now assimilated family tree where i'm the only going Wtf?? at the max about it

[gxlden-angels]

I love getting validated on small things that I didn't even consider like it's always a treat and this time it's Gender

The Fundie Baby Voice™️ has been popping up a lot in ex-christian spaces lately and I actually had one in middle school and part of high school! I learned when and where to use it and how to turn up my southern accent just enough. I can still do it but it sounds weird after 3 years on T. The main place I used it was at church cause it made me sound sweet and polite. I used it for old ladies when I worked at a grocery store too. My family didn't like it when we were just all together cause they said it sounded like baby talk, but loved it when I used it at church cause everyone would tell them how sweet and soft-spoken I was

My therapist said it actively made him feel uncomfortable when I used that voice. He couldn't quite put his finger on why it made him uncomfortable (other than him only knowing me on T) but he very much did not like it and he's so so right for that

#he's a cishet white jewish man so it's always a treat when I talk about something like this #cause it started off about how I felt like my gender is a performance and I will use it to my advantage #I usually talk fairly neutrally and monotone so people find it uncanny when I change it up #especially if it's the way I talk to my family and the church folks that ask about me #Now that I'm on T and had top surgery I love fucking with ppl via my gender presentation #I like the chaos of not correcting ppl and watching them fight amongst themselves over what my gender is #My previous gender was Weird Little Girl #and now i'm Just Some Guy #I don't feel like I was always a guy I feel like my gender at the time was Weird Little Girl #and it changed over time but I loved the performance of being a weird little girl #I was not a girl I was specifically a WLG #And well I still know how to use my old performances even if I'm no longer a weird little girl #I consider myself a guy but not a man and a girlie but not a woman #my gender is whatever is funniest at the moment #My gender is whatever you project onto me. My gender is a mirror to your childhood trauma #anyways I kinda lost the plot but yea I can kinda still use the fundie baby voice but it sounds a lil off #cause I've been on T for over 3 years now #ex christian #religious trauma

[howtheworldcouldb]

Jewish Bruce and Christian Dick having a competition when Hanukkah falls around Christmas time for who can put up the most obnoxiously festive decorations

#batman #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jewish bruce wayne #christian dick grayson #batfamily #bat family #batfam #wayne manor #gotham #hanukkah #hanukah #christmas #xmas #dc comics #dccomics #dc #dcu #detective comics #judaism #jewish #jewish waynes #christianity #nightwing #dc robin #richard grayson

[field-s-of-flowers]

Hey. Hey what if one of the OG lyctors was Jewish pre-resurrection. Wouldn’t that be so fucked up

#soph’s posts #The locked tomb #Or another religion besides Christianity. It’d be similarly fucked up #But I know the most about Judaism so that’s what I put in the post #Anyway. I was just thinking about how much M-’s atheism probably meant to her identity #And how John didn’t even think about how she’d feel about being semi-coerced into worshipping a seemingly omnipotent being #Not to mention founding a whole ass planetary society on the worship of that same omnipotent being #And then I started thinking about how important family and memory and rational thought are to Jewish tradition #And how having your memory and life taken from you and replaced by the teachings of a false god that you later have to learn lied to you #Is kind of one of the worst things you could do to a Jew imo #And THEN I started thinking about how the surname Shodash probably comes from Hebrew (sheish means six) #So yeah. My thoughts

[zhooniyaa-waagosh]

"I'm technically Jewish because if there was another Holocaust I would be killed for being pagan" sure is an. . . interesting take I just saw.

#hush and shush #antisemitism #this was not an ethnically jewish pagan #this was someone from a christian family who became pagan as an adult #saying that they're basically jewish because of this weirdo scenario they made up in their head

[fuckyeah-bears]

"real jewish people stand with palestinians and support a free palestine." - look, i agree with this entire post, but unless you're jewish yourself (if you are, disregard this), please don't speak about good jews, bad jews, real jews, fake jews. my zionist relatives are just as jewish as my staunchly anti-zionist acquaintances.

i am jewish. and i have zero respect for jewish people who are zionists. just as i have zero respect for non-jewish people who are zionists. just as i have zero respect for my jewish family members who are zionists

#and every time i call my mother out for being islamophobic and zionist she tells me i clearly haven't realized i'm jewish #as if being jewish means i have to be a racist islamophobic zionist #that is what i 10000% cannot respect #she is not a real jewish person she is a zionist #it's exactly the same as those posts of 'real christians' actually love thy neighbor and support the poor. oppose racism. etc etc #fake christianity being used to justify racism homophobia classism violence misogynism transphobia etc etc #same fucking thing #the amount of racist islamophobic disgusting bigotry i have heard from jewish friends and neighbors and family members is sickening #Judaism like pretty much all other religions at its core is about love and respect for other human beings #so when people use it to justify atrocities i will call them on bullshit #people like that give judaism and other jewish people a bad name #just as alt right conservative christains give all christains a bad name

[yardsards]

can i ask about your experience as a quaker (or growing up as one? i just saw you mention bein one in some tags)

i jus don't know much about them

so i was not raised quaker, i was raised baptist. which was. 0/10, do not recommend. all the guilt of catholicism with none of the stained glass lmaooo

like, i did resinate with the idea of there being some sort of higher power and i liked the idea of getting together with other believers to discuss spiritual matters but as i got older and started thinking for myself i realized i really didn't like a lot of things about the church. i hated the bigoted beliefs of its members. i hated the emphasis on blind obedience to authority. i didn't believe that the whole literal truth could be found within one book, specifically one group's interpretation of said book. and the idea that people were born inherently bad and sinful and that a supposedly kind and just god would condemn people to eternal suffering just for not believing the "right" things just did not sit well with me at all

when i went off to college i decided to try out a few different churches around town. i ended up settling on a progressive presbyterian church. the community was great and very accepting of queer people. i had some minor qualms with the theology but it wasn't like with my parents' church where every sermon made me feel increasingly nauseous, and i generally felt *good* during and after the services

and then covid hit and while they did stream their sermons, i lost that sense of community and just kinda... fell away

throughout all this i was researching different faiths online, both christian and non-christian. and one faith that kept popping up a lot that i liked the sound of was quakerism. like at one point i remember taking some online quiz of like "what religion do your values most align with" and quakerism was very in the lead. (before this, i'd only really been exposed to quakerism in history textbooks and assumed the religion died out alongside puritanism)

in the end what got me really interested was actually a video by a youtuber i liked, a queer/disability advocate and historical fashion enjoyer who also happened to be quaker

and after looking more into it, i decided to try attending a quaker meeting. which was easier due to covid cuz i could find a church online (located physically hundreds of miles from me) that did their sunday services over zoom

and so i attended and the people there were great and were doing actual good in their communities. and the way services were run, and their beliefs about what god *was* and all of that just hit me with an intense feeling of like. holy shit this is what i've always wanted from religion.

the video explains the sort of core beliefs and practices of quakerism better than i can but the main belief is that like. every person is godly. as such, it's our job to treat all living people as equally and kindly as possible. additionally, since we all have god inside of us, we need to look inwards and come to our own conclusions about our own religious beliefs and practices (and generally respect other people's religious beliefs even if they differ from our own, so long as they're not causing real tangible harm)

i haven't attended any meetings in a while, due to that group going back to semi in person (they still stream it out but it feels more like being a spectator than a member) and there being no quaker meetinghouses in the tiny town i currently live in, coinciding with me being too depressed to regularly attend anything. but i'm planning to start attending quaker meetings again once i move to a real city

#eliot posts #christianity cw #quakerism #tangentially: another faith that popped up a lot in my searches was reform judaism #from what i read it had a lot of the same things that i liked about quakerism. and was second place in that quiz i took lol #also my big sister was really interested in judaism when she was a teen (tho never converted) #bc our mother's side of the family is ashkenazi jewish but just ethnically not in practice. and my sis was interested in our roots #so i have a bit of a soft spot towards the faith because of her lol #but i decided i didn't wanna try and join any synagogues even online unless i was really serious about considering conversion #figured they didnt need a clueless gentile bargin in and being Confused and i felt too awkward to directly ask any individuals abt it #which was prolly like 20% a reasonable conclusion and 80% my anxious tendencies telling me i'm just a nuisance #but yeah lmao i think in a nearby parallel universe (if those exist) there's an eliot that converted to progressive judaism lol #long post

[piedoesnotequalpi]

I have more followers than I did this time last year, so a seasonal reminder from your slightly curmudgeonly neighborhood Jew that Christian "seders" are cultural appropriation and entirely inappropriate to put on

(if you're not Jewish and your Jewish friend invites you to their seder, that's fine and I hope you have a good time! Fresh fruit is usually a safe bet re: contributing food)

#isabel.tex #I'm so tired y'all #also this is not an invitation to tell me about your Christian “seder” or “passover feast” or w/e #y'all have been using the passover story to fuel blood libel for centuries and now you want in on Passover? #heck off #but yeah a good rule of thumb for Jewish holidays is if you are invited you are allowed to come participate #my family usually has at least one non-jew at our seder every year #just be polite when you're there #and if you're not invited do not try to do your own version of the holiday. it's a closed practice #judaism

[shoutsindwarvish]

two different rabbis directly to me + multiple places online: jewish imposter syndrome is real and is (to varying degrees) almost a universal experience in one way or another

me, who has been actively practicing for over nine months and taken multiple classes while also being halachically jewish by birth: i am the exception and am an imposter in jewish spaces and should feel bad about it. no i will not elaborate on why i believe this is true of me and no one else.

#to be clear NONE of this shame is being messaged to me by my shul #i’m just so insecure since i was raised religiously christian and only officially stopped attending church in 2020 #*february 2020 #even though i’d been drawn to judaism and deeply uncomfortable with christianity for years before that #and also had a degree of jewish identity through my family and celebrating holidays secularly growing up #i stayed as long as i did because 1) the liturgy was familiar #and 2) i’d be guaranteed to see my best friend once a week #converts have to go through a gauntlet. i feel like i’ve…cheated. #part of me wonders if i should pursue an affirmation #whether it would help i mean #but if i did my jewish grandfather would rise from the grave and say ‘YOU DON’T NEED IT BECAUSE YOU’RE PERFECTLY JEWISH AS YOU ARE’ #on the other hand he was also an atheist and probably would have mixed feelings on me practicing at all #although i’m not the only grandkid who’s done so #two of my cousins (their mom is my mom’s sister) were raised catholic but switched to judaism at least 10 years ago #to my knowledge neither of them went through an affirmation process #ughhhhh #my posts #jumblr #i guess i did elaborate why in the tags huh

[unopenablebox]

i guess i try not to make ten thousand posts that are literally just about how great my girlfriend is with no additional context or content, because, well, not good posting

but they're so great and every single day i'm excited to see them and talk to them and also today i'm particularly pleased that i managed to find god's Most Normal About Judaism gentile to live with because that is not a guarantee

#theyre simply so regular and chill about it. i get to have a normal time just being jewish and not ever having it be a thing #you may not recall that my last long term girlfriend was 1. Affirmatively Christian in a way where they cared that catholics are Not lmao #2. was ... a chaser but for jewish people? they did some of the weird idf soldier phenotype fetishizing too which was wild for a goy #3. definitely definitely definitely had g-grandparents who were gov officials in nazi germany but the family just pretended not to know #and they. weren't anti-semitic. in that. they ~liked that i was jewish. but it was still just Weird #and every now and then i notice that i am now in a situation. where it just gets to be fucking normal and regular that i am jewish #and that. is nicer #box opener

[apelcini]

it always feels strange saying that i had a shitty childhood because like. i did. but whenever i phrase it like that people always assume parental abuse or neglect and then i have to be like “oh no my parents were great it was just literally every other influence in my life that sucked” and we all just sit there silently for a minute while they freak out about accusing my parents of emotional neglect and i freak out because i said more than an off handed joke about my shitty childhood which is much too vulnerable and none of us enjoy it. so like what am i supposed to say then

#is there a word for i had my needs collectively abused neglected and/or misunderstood by every adult in my childhood to the point of #maladaptive behavioral patterns from my trauma that still affect my relationships to this day #it was a lot of ableism but there was also general lack of regarding children as people and also misogyny and homophobia #and just generally people being selfish and self centered and not caring about each other under capitalism #antisemitism is. a hard one to gauge for my area. lots of racial diversity but very few jews. lotta korean christians and other #demographics who have. very different behavioral values than my new york jewish family lol #yknow what actually. not gonna get into it at 3 am. that’s what you can call hashtag selfcare

[gxlden-angels]

I cannot express the anger I experience being unable to do anything about anything while Christians salivate over the idea of the Israel-Hamas conflict being a sign of the Rapture

#anyways Free Palestine #Hamas attacked innocent people #The Israeli government is terrorizing innocent civilians that just want the right to live #Jewish people deserve to have land where they are safe to go to if there is another rise in antisemitic attacks in their current home #Palestinians deserve to have their homeland respected and safe for them to live on #All of these statements can be true at the same time #and I say all of this from the safe comfort of the US #I am not the one that you should listen to about the situation. #I am not the one who you should trust to give correct information about what is going on because I get the same information you do #We should be listening to Palestinians and the Israeli civilians affected #And unfortunately the news in the US is based on Christians who want nothing more than to escalate this #They do not want to recognize Palestinians unless it brings about a world war that triggers the Rapture #And I am enraged by it #I know people currently living in Israel #I know students from Palestine #And I am infuriated by christians treating them like pawns in their little Jesus War #These are people. These are fucking people #They are friends and family and lovers and so much more #I genuinely cannot express just how frustrated I am by my inability to do anything as I sit in safety #If you get nothing else from this post please listen to Palestinians and the war crimes they've experienced for decades now #If you get nothing else please listen to Israeli civilians begging for their government to stop escalating this conflict #Please listen to Jewish people and Muslims when they say shit like this increases violence against them around the world #Anyways I'm at the doctor and someone had CNN on and I'm tired #antisemitism tw #islamophobia tw #israel-hamas war tw #rapture tw

[communistchilchuck]

and call tron christian one more time

#the way youd do the worlds first Jewish antivirus program like that #sawry i have strong feelings about this bc its annoying how people are so quick to think every religious narrative is christian by default #when the director said it was based partially on what his family experienced during the Holocaust

[crushofdoves]

frankie is making me watch this new documentary about christian fundamentalists and like….i know i say this a lot but christianity is literally insane what the FUCK

#her family were typical nyc catholics until she was like 10 #and then her parents were like ‘we’re evangelical christians now and you’re all gonna be home schooled’ 😌 #and moved them into the middle of nowhere in update ny #i wasn’t raised religious more like agnostic jewish #anyway this shit is INSANE #like my fuckin jaw is hanging open watching this shit