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feelingdozy · 1 month

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White Knuckled - Yuuta Okkotsu

Summary: Before you know it, you, Yuuta, and all the other sorcerers present in the area are battling against Sukuna. When you wake up in a hospital bed, you're greeted with the harsh realities of the aftermath of battle.

wc: 3,1k

Warnings: spoilers (recent arc - "Shinjuku Showdown"), Heavy themes ahead -> Major character death, fighting, talk of wounds/gashes, blood etc, self-doubt, lots of crying/trembling, grief, descriptions of death, mention of drug, heartbreaking angst no happy ending

You were thinking about Yuuta again- the boy who always wakes up on time, early mornings greeting him with you clinging onto him. The only person he's focused on and in his line of sight as he pushes himself to rise from the bed, twisting his head in your direction. He's constantly distracted, solely by your sleeping form. He can never get enough of your beauty as he stares at you for a good while before carefully lifting himself off the shared mattress, trying not to disturb your rest. Fully getting out of bed, he walks over to your side before going to shower, planting a gentle kiss on your forehead before getting some towels.

You awake most days to find his side of the bed silent, today being no different. The spot beside you is empty, lacking the boy's comforting presence. He never wants to startle you, so he lets you wake up on your own accord, even if that means abandoning the plush of his bed and the soft blankets that surround the two of you and encapsulate the overflowing affection and love shared.

He was usually the big spoon, so he never had to worry about maneuvering out of your firm grip- one that longed for him to stay. Forever if the day had offered, but knowing that it'd never be true, it lacked the might to hold him back from removing it. He had learned how to sneak out quietly and carefully with time, and had become somewhat of a pro, but left you lonely- contemplating if you really had to wake up, when instead you could be faced with the prettiest boy you had ever seen by your side, planting soft kisses along your neck and jawline. Another hour in bed wouldn't hurt, right?

Now it was mandatory. The bright lights of the room stained your eyes, being able to see them even as your eyelids were screwed shut. Your body was planted to the unusual bed you'd been laying on for awhile now- unable to move even an inch from the pain that stretched all over your sore body. Chest lined with cuts, battered black and blue from what you had been through- you were afraid of tearing open wounds more, or causing unnecessary sparks of pain throughout. Relentless with such things as fighting, of course you had lined yourself up for such a demise. Also the fact that being someone prominent in the Jujutsu world was enough to get you a front-row spot to your death- Sukuna rivaling you this time around.

Being up there with Yuuta made it even harder to concentrate. Of course your hits on the enemy were steady, and slashes were taken with the utmost seriousness and all strength you harbored inside your being- yet somehow none was enough against the monster, and now you watched countless of your friends experience the same awaited fate of death at their doorstep.

It made you nervous. Anxious. Although you couldn't show it, you shook with fear. You tried your best to accept your death before you even stepped foot outside your door, but the truth was that you weren't ready to go yet. You felt you had a little more in you- at least a little longer. But alas- such a universe showed no pity no matter what good deeds you may have done to benefit others. Monsters didn't wait for the comfortability of their enemy. Or they did- just to tear them down right in front of your eyes.

"YUUTA!" You cried amidst the battle, head focused on Yuuta's attacks as Sukuna went after him harshly.

Watching Yuuta's every movement made you eager to join him on the field, but with all the might left in him, he had begged you not to unless it was absolutely needed a couple days prior. And you weren't going to go against him- especially not in such dire moments where he didn't have the time to focus on protecting you.

His domain had done great damage, and his power was demonstrated through every attack meticulously planned in the moments retrieve- he was a beast. But monsters and beasts are quite different. Monsters wanted only the worst for their opponent. No mercy for anyone- leave nothing to the imagination of outcomes. Rip them apart, starting from the very root of what they care about- they don’t bring any good, and don't intend to do any.

You tried to stay strong, keeping your emotions away from the battlefield- out of reach and unable to affect you. But seeing a big gash accompanied by groans of pain in front of you, you could no longer sit back and simply watch Yuuta get slashed apart.

Only remembering bits and pieces made it hard to put crumbs back into the full dish- but you recalled every emotion cursing through you at the time- anger, frustration, despairing sadness. Everything balled up into one and came at you as fast as your sword went for the curse that had taken away your everything- just Sukuna daring to lay a hand on him was reason enough to act such a way- Irresponsible. But who was to say it was your fault? One of the higher ups? Ones who decided they'd never let their students fully grasp a proper adulthood, left to suffer for their consequences and fight for them against vile curses?

Sometimes, the biggest dream of sorcerers was to live a simple life. Such a thing was always pondered by friends, brought up as measly discussion. Now it was obvious why it was chatted about so much- it was something you now longed for. Love was the biggest influence, yet it could bring a person down all the like. Heartbreak, too, was a strong emotion. The scene of Yuuta and his blood spilling onto his white uniform was something that'd constantly replay in your head, over, and over, and over.

Other than gory scenes and scattered emotions, you remembered nothing of what happened, nor where you ended up, or how you ended up. Where you ended up could be the heavens for all you knew- the bright lights sitting above didn't deny you of that theory. It was only when the scene before you steadied into hazy recognition- not as much as a blur. You tried to focus on one thing at a time, but seeing machines hooked up to every possible space they could cram them to fit on your body to keep you alive wasn't a very welcoming sight back to reality. Chatter around you never ceased, so in a constant headache of confusion and uncertainty, you laid there, quiet and in pain.

Hours passed until most had left- nurses and doctors filtered out the room alike in big groups, assumingly to help others like they had to you. Now only left with a couple accompanying people left, you took the chance to test your vocal chords- if you still had them

Your voice was hoarse and your throat ached with every sentence you tried to produce, rendering it inconceivable. Yet you suffered through and attempted your best, gaining the eyes of the couple nurses still present around you. Making out sounds, it became hard to distinguish long words, so you quickly shortened them, able to alert them with the name, "Yuuta".

"Yuuta? I'm not sure- i've only been attending to you" One of them replied simply, not eager to cast another glance your horrid way. She was probably angry she had to change the bandaids wrapped around you every once in awhile- somehow you had gotten on her bad side by staying perfectly still and asleep most of the time she did it. Maybe the cuts were the hard sights to bare. Who knew- and who cared- not when there were more important questions to be asked.

"I've heard of him, haven't seen him." Another spoke up, just as uncaring as the other tending to you. In a random state of worry, ripping sounds filled the air just as suddenly needles were being ripped out of your arm and machines moved, crashing against each other with multiple resounding bang's, the metal clanging and alerting whoever was left in the room as you burst out the door. Although you heard yelling behind you, you never once stalled, not focused on them enough to listen, nor care. You weren't going to be denied- no matter what. You needed to find him- and if they couldn't give you answers, you'd get them yourself.

Passing doors of all sorts, you were unable to determine a sign of which one would be him- so you resorted to opening them a crack, enough to see if the person inside resembled a person you'd recognize by familiar looks, or his scent alone.

Yet across all the doors you stumbled upon, none of them had the boy you were searching so desperately for, and your head was starting to spin- except you didn't know if it was from your sudden sprint out your assigned room or the worry that now clouded you. You kept on your feet though, constantly ignoring the calls of your name down the dimly lit and eerie hospital hallways.

And as you sprinted, some conversations made it to your ear as you made multiple people jump because of an unexpected appearance of a distraught and unkempt patient quick to run by and disregard them as they were bumped and shoved from their path. Most of the chatter wasn't related, but some of the names you'd heard mumbled under breaths did strike a chord, meaning some had made it to the hospital with you.

Heart starting to beat at rapid rates, breathing starting to get uncoordinated and wonky, legs starting to fail from beneath you- every single thing was going wrong and you were about to drop of pure exhaustion, and no sign of Yuuta was to be found in such a place. Unable to go without assistance, you clung on to one last door at the end of a hallway- it was a dead end anyways, so you'd be caught and escorted back quickly as they were hastily on your tail, trying to sit you back down to stare blankly and the boring tiled roof above, and the cold floor below you knew all too well now.

Everything felt wrong- everything felt bad, and it washed over you with a chilling shiver. Not knowing if you were in a state of delusion, maybe drug withdrawals- everything happened to be catching up to you and rushing to your head. With the heavy push of your body colliding with the door, it swung open hard enough and hit the wall, greeting you with the view before it.

What you saw looked peaceful. Tranquil even. It looked like he was in a state of meditation- his eyes were fastened shut, but gently- not forcing them closed, but not lousy either. His hands rested at his torso, held together and something clenched hard in his fist to where his knuckles were painted with the faint color of white fading away, knowing he hadn't been holding the object tighter much longer ago. The rest of his body was stiff and prim- proper, like he was sat set up in a coffin and ready to be hauled off to the graveyard. You looked at his face again, admiring the way a smile still stood strong on his face, the muscles habitually putting him in such a facial position, obviously the outcome of wearing it often.

You gasped when you first barged into the room, scared to shock the injured, but you realized loud noises didn't phase the man on the bed, and he had stayed the same without batting an eye, or sitting up toward the sound.

Then your breath hitched.

Your heart jumped out of your body.

Your eyes trailed his half-blanketed figure again, with the same thoughts as before racking your brain- and after your second inspection of the body, you realized something new.

His hair was black, parted in the way you always remembered- you used to tease him about it sometimes- give him a side part to annoy him, poke fun at his sides saying how you'd wanna see him with long hair although you both knew it'd never happen. It had the same volume as when you ruffled it as he laid on your chest in the late evenings. The sun had already set through the curtains, and the moon dawned on the two of you, bathing you in the moonlight as the tv screen reflected in two pairs of eyes.

Except this time his hair wasn't all over the place because of your gentle fingers. His eyes weren't shut because you made him laugh with a stupid joke, to where he was crying and begging you to stop or else he threatened he'd piss his pants- and although it'd be his fault, you would start to crack up beside him insisting him not to. His mouth wasn't in a smile because he saw you first thing after training, a sigh of relief parting from his lips as his hands opened themselves for a long awaited hug. His body wasn't laid down because he was sleeping next to you.

It was because his chest no longer would rise or fall.

Sprinting to his aid, you hurriedly reaching for his hand, neck- any place a stable pulse could reach your fingers and give you signs of life. Everything before your eyes gave you a harder punch to the gut then anything you'd experienced in your lifetime.

Suddenly reality dawned and came crashing down before you- as did your body, falling to the cold ground. Only the measly hospital gown aided you for cover as you started to sob, unable to do anything else but slouch over defeatedly, cradling your head in your hands as your mind shattered.

You didn't care to keep up a strong face anymore. You didn't care to impress the people around you with your courage and strength.

You pleaded with all your might- to the heavens even- , begging and screaming loud, cracking voice and undying chants asking, why couldn't you have come just moments sooner? Why couldn't you have been better? Stronger? You wailed out, begging, begging for a miracle- a switch of souls even.

With damp cheeks and a pitiful appearance, only despair covered your features and grief filled every sense you had left working. You were stumbling around as if you had no feeling in your legs- except you simply didn't. Your hands went limp at your sides like you were already succumbing to the exhaustion of your cries- except your muscles felt like jelly and couldn't withstand the heavy weight of your tears that heavily spilt. Your body felt like it weighed more pounds then any person in the world could ever lift, head drooped like a bowling ball had been propped up on it, ready to smash and collide into the ground.

Planted in place, no one could take you away from his bedside. You clung to his lifeless body. You wrapped your hand around his, trying to shake him awake while muttering a few words to hopefully make him sit up and tell you it was all a silly joke.

He wasn't yet cold, but soon he would be. Soon he'd be taken away from you. You wouldn't see him again. You weren't ever going to see him again. Ever.

Anyone who tried to awake and pull you from your distressed state couldn't get ahold of you in the slightest. You didn't hear the voices around you. You didn't hear the beeping of machines, or the rushing of doctors and nurses invading his room. You could only sit there and hold onto his tightly closed palm with all your might and resist the power of hands pulling you towards them. Behind you they kept on, trying to escort you back to your room by lifting your slacked body onto a bed stationed out of the room, being picked up under the armpits like you were a toddler.

The one day he didn't wake up before you- he didn't carefully try to roll out of bed, nor did he whisper sweet, hushed "goodmorning"'s in your ear. He didn't give you a forehead kiss. You didn't get to say goodbye.

As you pressed a wet kiss onto his closed palm, it slightly loosened at the action, letting you gently pry it open in the state of chaos around you. The object he held close in his hand was now held close to your heart, in an even stronger grip then he had It in. No one was taking it from you.

As much as you screamed and begged in their arms, nothing worked as tears fogged your vision, and the only thing you felt in the moment was the drops from your eyes staining your cheek. You had eventually passed out from how much you struggled, mixed with crazed sobs and constant pleading for a sign he was still with you.

Waking up in that room felt no different than the first. Except something was gone. Something felt right- or out of place.

It felt like you had been pierced right in the heart. There was now a wide wound. A bigger wound then any other weapon or curse could've caused you. The empty space was simply there. Somehow, although nothing was in its spot or piercing you physically, it throbbed. It ached. Yet no blood spilled out of your chest. No blood spewed out from your mouth. You were perfectly healthy.

....

Why couldn't it have been you instead of him?

Suddenly, you remembered the box in your hand. You hadn't been able to make out what the object was before, but now as you weakly brought it up to your eyes, observing it, it was a black, velvet jewely box, with the words "promise" engraved on the plastic protecting it. You brought your other hand up, and with shaking fingers, ripped off the plastic and opened the box.

It sparkled in your eyes- before you a tiny diamond ring, beautifully detailed with initials on the side. Your eyes widened, not expecting something so fancy and thoughtful while you looked like a mess- a puffy face which tears had already starting leaking out of, tangled hair, and a sad hospital gown. A note flew down to your chest when the box was opened, hands clumsily scouring for where it had landed on the thin hospital blanket over you. It was folded tiny, tickling your fingertips to open the paper.

"If this letter gets to you, it means I couldn't personally go down on one knee and present it myself. Even if I couldn't give this to you, I hope you receive it. It was all I could afford with the money I saved up, and I know its only a promise ring, but, I hope you like it. Maybe in another life, I would be able to see your face right now.

I love you."

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x you #jjk fic #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #yuuta x reader #okkotsu yuuta x reader #yuuta okkotsu x reader #yuuta x you #yuuta okkotsu x you #yuta okkotsu x reader

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last-words-ofashootingstar · 2 months

Note

hiii could you do more of Baby!Seonghwa pls?? I loved it and i can’t stop thinking about it since i’ve read it, amazing work btw thanks <3

Medicine

❥Yandere Park Seonghwa x fem reader

➯a/n: this is a work of fiction and does NOT represent a healthy little and caregiver relationship, or a healthy relationship of any kind. i'm back at it with my mommy hwa shenanigans while tweaking with the shells plot line mwahaha

takes place before Baby (you don't have to read to understand but it gives this some extra spice)

✃ "I'd burn alive just for the soft light on your face." -Paper Doll, Flower Face

✫彡wordcount: 3k

♡'･ᴗ･'♡(ಡ‸ಡ)(¯ ³¯)♡genre: yandere, angst, hurt & comfort

ಠ_ಠwarning/content: stockholm syndrome, periods and period blood(non descriptive), everyone is morally grey, non sexual nudity, references to sh and violence(not towards reader), it's fair to say seonghwa is a murderer lol, jongho and baby bff agenda as hinted at in the first part, more exploration of how the members are affected, one mention of sewer slide, mingi needs a hug fr, not proof read

⁂perm taglist: @stvrfir3 @tunaasan @marievllr-abg

✩index: little space; a regressed state of mind where one feels like a child. hyung; a name for an older male friend or sibling, used by other males.

MATURE UNDER CUT MDNI

Seonghwa was certain that he could handle anything you threw his way after five months of being his captive in his care.

He knew you well, better than he knew himself most days. Even before he had 'taken you home', he tried to learn everything about you to make the transition easier. Some things though- were impossible to know.

You hadn't gotten your period since before your 'big move', as he called it. He read up on all things womanly to be better prepared so he knew that stress could cause you to skip it. And it did for a long while. Now, though, you were starting to settle in.

He knew they were painful. But nothing prepared him for the heartbreak when he saw you in the state you were in now.

He had just gone downstairs to get the mail, but that was apparently all the time it took for you to lock yourself in the bathroom.

"I don't know what happened, Hyung!" Mingi was just as panicked as Seonghwa at the moment, he felt responsible for whatever was happening behind the locked bathroom door. What if you had gotten into their razors? It would be all his fault... His Hyung trusted him with his Baby and she dashed away before he could even register it.

Everyone saw the shift in you the past few days, moody and hungry and tired. One of the managers even had the nerve to ask if you could be pregnant. As if Hwa would ever let you skip your birth control.

"She just ran off! Everything was fine," Mingi continued as he jiggled the knob relentlessly, slapping his palm on the wood while calling out.

His voice was so loud in Seonghwa's mind. He was so overwhelmed. Scared. Full of rage.

And then they heard the shower turn on.

At least he knew you were alive in there.

"Baby?" He pushed his younger member out of the way and knocked on the door much gentler. "You know you can't take baths alone. Open the door and let me help you."

There was no response.

"Now, Baby."

Only the sound of the water hitting linoleum tiles.

"Don't make me count to three."

Mingi backed up at that. He hated when he counted just as much as you did.

But he didn't have to count, when he heard the tiniest sniff from over the pelting water his body reacted for him. His shoulder came in contact with the door and in the next second he had broken through the frame of the door.

Mingi looked on in shock, eyes fixed on the metal lock on the door which was still stuck out in place. They followed to the doorframe, splintered open. Then they fell to you, curled up naked on the bathroom floor under the raining water. He looked away at that, turning and crouching down to pick up the broken pieces of wood to busy himself until he knew you were okay enough to leave you in Seonghwas care alone.

Seonghwa had kneeled next to you, uncaring as the water soaked the knees on his pants. Even more uncaring as he leaned over your face, blocking the water with the back of his head and soaking the collar of his shirt and his hair. The scorching water dripped from his hair to your face as he cupped it in his hands, inspecting you for any damage on the surface.

"Baby, my baby, what's wrong?" The pain in his voice was just as present as the pain in your face. Wound tight like your eyebrows as you winced.

"H-hurts." Was all you could manage, groaning as he untucked your arms from around you to inspect you further. You were fine on the surface.

"Hyung..." His head snapped back to Mingi, who held out your shorts pinched between his fingers, touching them as little as possible. There was a dark spot on them, red and angry as it stained the pattern.

He looked down slowly, eyes meeting the drain as it sucked up the pink tinted water.

ఌ

It took all the convincing in the world from Seonghwas part that for you to remember that you weren't dying. That this happened to big girls every month. Eventually he managed to dry you off after letting the water sooth you for a while and set you up with a pad from the box he's had under the sink since he brought you home.

But then again, some things he couldn't have been prepared for. You told him your periods weren't just painful, they were debilitating. He wished he would have asked you before hand to be more prepared- but now he knows better for next time!

He set you up on the couch with a sock full of uncooked rice that he'd heated up placed on your stomach while he did frantic research on his phone. He peeked back and when he saw you were fast asleep, tuckered out from fighting the pain, he made a beeline downstairs- not even bothering to wait for the elevator and essentially jumping down the stairs.

He barged right into Yunho and Yeosangs dorm, making a mental note to scold them for not locking the door later on. But for now he was on a mission for his baby.

"Hello, Yeosang," he greeted briefly as he barged into the room as well, going straight to his shelf of supplements and vitamins. He could only stare dumbfounded as he scooped up what he needed and left. "Bye, Yeosang."

"Hello, Yunho." He spoke as he passed him in their kitchen. He raided the pantry and left with a simple, "Bye, Yunho." The both of them looked on in confusion as their Hyung left the dorm, not bothering to even shut the door.

"Yah, that's ours!"

Yunhos yell when unheard -or rather uncared for- as he was out the door just as fast as he came, desperately rushing down the hall as they looked on.

ఌ

That was how everyone ended up in the top story dorm, watching in confusion and anxiety as Seonghwa sat down his stolen goods on the coffee table infront of the couch, careful not to wake you. He went to walk off, and Wooyoung opened his mouth, "is she o-"

"Shh!" The eldest shushed harshly, shutting him up as he sped walked away.

"Hey, thats mine!" Another victim of Seonghwas thievery followed his Hyung with a sleepy grimace, blinking confusedly at the scene in the living room.

They had all seen some strange behavior from their eldest member, especially through the past nine months that lead up to this. The day you met was like a switch flipped in his imbalanced mind.

They hated you for that. Or rather, hated the idea of you. Every one of their moral compasses was spun in a complete three sixty when their Hyung kidnapped you those five months ago. He wasn't the same. For the good or bad, you changed Seonghwas live, all of their lives-

For bad, you had been the reason that Hongjoong had to pick dirt from under his nails after covering up one of his best friends sins. You were the reason Mingi had to take a three week hiatus to cover recover from the bruises from when he made eye contact with you. You were the reason that a quarter of their staff had to be paid off when the word spread, just to keep everything from going public.

But then- you were the reason that Seonghwa had started smiling again. The reason he tossed his blades into the river. You were the inspiration to eight different songs in only these few months, one of which was a major break through for them. Your childlike attitude beamed through the apartments.

You brought a certain light to their lives, one that was emitted from the fires of Hell.

They promised themselves they'd be indifferent to you, to not get involved as much as possible for the sake of their own sanity and morals. And yet, here they are.

Gathered in the living room with heavy hearts as they looked over you, silently begging for Seonghwa or Mingi to tell them what was wrong with you.

"Hyung..." Jongho spoke as softly as he could, his eyes couldn't help but fixate on the way you held yourself like you wanted to disappear. "What did you do to her?"

He, out of everyone, was most worried.

He hated this situation just as much as the others. Hell, he was still fighting himself every day to turn his Hyung in- even if their entire worlds would come crashing down. Because he hated to see you in pain. An innocent person suffering because he was too cowardly.

You were attached to the hip the second that Seonghwa let you out of his room. You dashed for the scariest looking member... because he was less scary than the man who snatched you up, who you thought you could trust. You hid behind his arms as everyone else looked on, simply staring in the disbelief of what their once trusted and kind member had done.

Hongjoong was in the same boat, just as troubled as Jongho was with the entirety of what had become their lives. He prided himself in the fact that he was a good person, through and through. He did good deeds when no body was looking, simply because it spread good feelings. All he ever wanted to put in the world was positivity. But when he saw the tears that his best friend caused, his heart made him simply look the other way. You didn't like Hongjoong much. His picture in Seonghwas room taunted you, made you resent him for being so obviously close to the source of all your pain. But he didn't treat you any different for it.

"Park Seonghwa, you promised you wouldn't hurt her like that," Hongjoong sneered through his teeth, ready to grab his only Hyung by the ear when he heard a small grumble from the couch.

You blinked. Once, twice.

And then you broke into a waterfall of hot tears.

"Hey, Baby it's okay," Seonghwa tried to soothe you, only to be pushed flat away from you as Jongho came and took his seat infront of the couch where you were situated.

"Hi, little bear," he cooed, taking you into his arms immediately when you weakly opened yours. He moved slowly as he sat on the couch with you in his lap, but slowly wasn't slow enough to stop the aches from pulsing through your veins on what felt like a molecular level.

It was Wooyoungs turn now to feel brave and stand up to Hwa- well, stand over him as he watched his baby with tears of his own welling up. "She's never cried this hard, what did you do?"

"Baby-"

He was pushed back down as he reached for you, a begging pout on his lips as Yeosang held him down by his shoulders.

He didn't know what had changed in his members but he knew it was shit timing. You needed comfort and calm, not to see your caregiver held down and restrained from you.

A pink sock hit Yeosangs head and he looked up with soft shock written on his features as he met your eyes. You immediately looked down, you still weren't allowed to look them in the eyes and you most definitely didn't want a punishment ontop of natures own. "Don't hurt my Mommy..."

"Honey, did your Mommy do this to you?" Yunho asked as he bent to your level.

You simply shook your head. Were they really fighting over your well-being? Why didn't they do that months ago when this whole fiasco started? You blinked away the thought as another teeth gritting cramp hit you. You hid in Jonghos sweater, trying to quiet down your sobs.

It wasn't all for naught though, as you could hear Mingi finally speaking up when he returned from the kitchen, a baby bottle of juice in hand that he sat down with Seonghwas thieved goodies. "She got her period..." Some of them immediately started cooing over you, and while you couldn't tell who with your head trying to burrow its way into Jongho to hide, it still made your ears feel hot with embarrassment.

"Oh, poor baby," San was the first one to speak, plugging in the heating pad he was robbed of minutes early with zero hesitation, gently draping it over your lower back.

"Get off me," Seonghwa finally snapped and pushed Yeosang and Wooyoung away, crawling on his knees to the couch. "Baby, I've got some stuff to help you but you'll have to come off Jongho, okay?"

You had a hint of defiance in your pain filled eyes as you peeked from the plush sweater you were hidden in. "No, big bear," you put on the cutes and hugged Jonghos neck tighter.

"I know big bear is comfortable," he bit his tongue as he looked at the way you so willingly curled into his youngest members lap for comfort that he should be providing, "but give me five minutes, I need to take care of you."

"Come on, little bear," Jongho sat up as careful as possible, ignoring the tug on his heart as you whined. He cared for you, of course. But he feared Seonghwa more.

Wooyoung couldn't bear to watch anymore, taking San's hand and disappearing down the hall. He used to look up to Seonghwa, now he could barely look in his eyes.

Mingi followed their lead, he wanted to be strong and comfort you, but he simply couldn't handle another second of seeing you reduced to tears. He'd never watch you cry again. His heart couldn't take it. Maybe that made him a coward of a man, but he didn't care at the moment.

That left Hongjoong sat across the coffee table with Yunho, Yeosang lowering himself into the armchair, and Seonghwa on his knees infront of you as you clung to Jonghos neck.

"Good..." He was certain there was blood filling his mouth from the way he bit down on his tongue. "I didn't want to leave you so these will do for now until I order your own, right?" It was rhetorical-was it? It's not like you had a choice in the matter. But he was so kind that it made your brain foggy. Like he really cared of your opinion for a moment.

"Magnesium, zinc, and vitamin d," he explained as he took one from each of the bottles. "More vitamin d," he sat the bottle of juice next to your legs. "And comfort," he drug the basket of sweets that he used as rewards for good behavior to the edge of the table and let you take a peek, seeing the new and unfamiliar chocolates on top.

Intrigued by the fancy looking wrapper, you reached out. Seonghwa only put the medicine in your hand. "Medicine first, Baby. Then you can have all you want from the basket."

Seonghwa was a lot of things but he wasn't a liar, never to you.

So, you sucked it up and took the medicine.

ఌ

Later that night, everyone besides Hongjoong and Jongho had returned home (save for the three that actually lived in the apartment with you). Mingi didn't exit his room, not even for dinner. San came and joined movie night after Wooyoung left.

The movie long ended, leaving everyone in the room dead asleep besides Seonghwa. How could he sleep at a moment like this? His Baby could wake up at any moment and need him.

So, he just sat and watched over the most important people in his life. His best friend, laid on the couch with his head on the opposite end as you, curled into a ball with nothing but a stuffed monkey to keep him company. His youngest member, laid on the floor with a pillow to his chest. And San, he was-

"Hyung?"

He was awake. Seonghwa perked up a bit, blinking away that familiar look in his eyes before he turned to the armchair where San was draped in a strange position. "Hyung, you should go to sleep..."

Both their eyes drifted to you, sound asleep. He'd either have to curl up behind you on the couch with Hongjoong or move you to your shared bed.

"You know..." San sighed, almost silently. "I hate you for what you did to her. For what got us here. But I would be lying if I said you didnt take good care of her. You love her, don't you?"

"I love her more than life." It was a declaration that was as easy as breathing. Though he'd never said it out loud to anyone other than you. Until now. Seeing you like that... "I love her. I never want her to be in pain like that, you don't understand, San. I was ready to kill myself if she was dying."

"Don't be ridiculous-"

"I'm serious."

The look in his eyes told him he was was. He would never joke when it came to you. He was always dead serious. He would rather not be in this world at all than be in it without you. "I know you don't understand, I'm not asking you to. But I had to do what I did. I had to do it. I had to."

"I know." And he did. San knew that, by all means Seonghwa didn't have to do what he did. He didn't have to kidnap you and keep you imprisoned in their dorm and buy people off to keep their mouth shut. But Seonghwa thought that he did. His mind had convinced him, and there was no turning back.

That first night, when they found you tied to his bed, that was all he could say. I had to. I had to. I had to. With his head tucked between his knees like a scolded child defending themselves- although everyone was too shell shocked to even say a word until Wooyoung broke the silence with a simple, 'what the fuck.' I had to. I had to. I had to.

"Do you?"

San licked his lips, took a deep breath, and rolled around to face the back of the arm chair. "I know you, Park Seonghwa. And you did what you believed was necessary. I can never agree with your reasoning... but I'll never fight you on it. Take your baby and go to bed. We're all tired."

Seonghwa couldn't see them, but there was fat tears rolling down San's face. He hadnt cried over this. But something had finally faded away and let him. He never referred to you as that. He liked to think you'd enjoy being separate from the life that Seonghwa had built for you. Not that you could notice most of the time, forced so deep into little space that your head felt light and fluffy like a bag of cotton candy.

He must have finally come to terms with the fact that this was reality.

"C'mon, baby girl," he heard him whisper, followed by a small groan as you were picked up. He waited until he heard Seonghwas door click. And he let all his tears free fall.

Seonghwa set your tired form down on your side of the bed, crawling in after you while trying to push away that itch in his brain that was screaming that he forgot your nightly routine. He tucked that little voice away and settled in bed, bringing the soft comforter over you both and melting into his pillow with a sigh.

He gathered you close as gently as possible and rubbed your back, staring up at the ceiling and listening closely to your breathes as they evened out to quiet snores.

A smile played at his lips.

For a moment he felt like everything would be okay. You had your medicine-

He felt you curl closer to his warmth, and he brought his finger tips up to brush your loose hairs back with a tenderness reserved only for you.

-And he had his.

ఌ

#ateez #yandere ateez #park seonghwa #yandere seonghwa #yandere fic #seonghwa x reader

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ultralightpoe · 1 year

Note

hi ultra:D can I please request a song for an Eddie Munson imagine? I was thinking maybe ‘Time’ by NF? if it’s not a song you are comfortable with or if you don’t write for his character - disregard this with no worries!:) glad to have you back and posting!! I hope you are well darling

Time - Eddie Munson

Authors Note: AN EDDIE REQUEST! YES! I HAVE NEVER HAD AN EDDIE REQUEST

Warnings: Angst, trauma, depression Eddie is a massive dickkkkkkkkkkk

Word Count: 2436

Description: Eddie can't ever seem to open up to you.

Enjoy!

Even if we both break down tonight

And you say you hate me, and we go to bed angry

I know everything will be alright

I'll be here waiting, I promise I'm changing

I just need

Eddie woke up on the rug of the apartment living room floor, eyes stinging from the crying and throat dry from the night of yelling that had taken place. It took him a moment to regain himself, picking himself up to look around the apartment, a hopeful feeling in his chest that you would be in the room and you hadn’t actually left.

No such luck, you were nowhere in sight.

A dull ache in his chest to match the one in his head caused by a hangover, the chest was due to heartbreak. He was sure of it.

Trudging through the hall to get to the kitchen and find the bottle of Advil you always restocked. A harsh curse escaped him when he stepped on a piece of glass, pulling his foot up to hop away from the shattered bottles on the tile of the floor.

“Jesus fuc-”

“Eddie?” Linda, your neighbor, calls before knocking on the door.

“Yeah! Just um- one sec!”

A little time to show you I'm worth it

I know that I can be a difficult person

I'm a stress case, drive you up the wall when I'm workin'

Actually, I'm probably worse when I'm not, you don't deserve it

Make you nervous 'cause you know I'ma break soon

Every time I do, I say somethin' that hurts you

Actin' like I'm gone, but we both in the same room

I don't like to be wrong, which I know you relate to

And I know I make you feel like you're at the end of your rope

—-------------------------

He had come home drunk, four hours after telling you he was going out for spaghetti noodles, and you were waiting by the front door with your arms crossed and lips sneered. There were frown lines forming on your face and your hair was all out of place.

“Please don’t star-” Eddie whines, using the wall to walk to the couch, woozy and halfway gone. “Always with the nagging.”

“Nagging?” You laugh dryly, following him to the living room. Watching as he lays on the couch and you stay standing. “Enough. Enough of this.”

“Enough of what?” He laughs, acting incredulous.

“Eds, you said you were going out to get spaghetti noodles for our dinner and you stumbled in four hours later drunk as a skunk.” You seethe, reaching a hand to snap at him back awake. “This is a problem-”

“You don’t understand-”

“And here we go with the ‘you don’t understand’ bullshit. ‘Y/n I’ve seen things you wouldn’t believe. I nearly lost my life. I can’t talk about it but it was so traumatic-’ I’m so sic”

“Are you mocking me right now?” He snaps, sitting up on the couch to glare at you. “Fuck you Y/n.”

“No FUCK YOU!” The first yell of the night, and you were expecting it to be the last as you stormed off down the hall. Normally he would give up and stay on the couch, but tonight seemed to be a good night to fight.

“HEY! GET BACK HERE!” He shouts, following you down the hall just in time to see you snatch a bag from the closet and start filling it with clothes. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“I’m leaving.”

“Leaving?”

“LEAVING. Packing.” You reiterate, sparing him a side eye right as he lunges forward to try and snatch the bag. You keep a firm grasp on it and for a moment you both are wrestling over the bag. “I am tired. Eddie, I am so tired of this.”

“Tired of what?!” He snaps, finally pulling the bag from your grasp.

“I am wasting my life on you!” You sob, the tears you had been fighting all night finally releasing. “I get it, you went through something terrible, and I am sorry I mocked it tonight because that is completely fucked up. But Eds you can’t do this. You can’t do this to me.”

“Do what to you?” He sneers. “I’m sorry Y/n, is my pain hurting you?!”

“IT IS! YOU! THE SECRETS AND THE DRINKING!”

“WHAT FUCKING SECRETS?!”

“EDS I NEVER MEET YOUR FRIENDS! YOU NEVER LET ME MEET THEM AND YOU NEVER SPEAK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED!”

“BECAUSE IT’S NONE. OF. YOUR. FUCKING. BUSINESS!” His face is beet red now, hair swinging wildly as you stare at him in shock. The silence of the room makes his heart start racing rapidly.

“Then why am I here?” You ask softly, shoulders slumping. He stares for a moment before walking out of the room, your bag still in hand.

That's when I look at you and tell you I'd be better alone

Just the pride talkin', isn't it? 'Cause both of us know

I'm the definition of "wreck" if you look into my soul

Comes out the most when I feel I'm in a vulnerable place

Made a lot of mistakes I wish I knew how to erase

When I'm afraid, might get distant and I push you away

But no matter the case, I'ma do whatever it takes even if

The older woman is smiling softly when he opens the door, the overly blushed cheeks round and puffy as her teeth flash. “Oh hello Edward dear.”

“Morning.” He nods, clearing his throat as he tries to stand straighter and seem normal. “What can I do for you?”

“Oh well, I- uhm, well while you usually…..sleep in in the mornings Y/n comes over and makes some breakfast with me and last night I heard some yelling and she didn’t come by this morning-”

“I have no clue where she is.” Eddie interrupts, a harsh wave of panic filling his body as he realizes he had no clue where you were. “But I will send her over when she comes back.”

“Oh….okay.” She nods, walking away before he can say anything else, leaving him standing there, finally coming to terms with it.

How long had you been going to breakfast with the neighbor when he slept in hungover? How had he not known you were that close with your neighbor? How much was he missing? How much did he not know about you? How much had he hurt you?

Even if we both break down tonight

And you say you hate me, and we go to bed angry

I know everything will be alright

I'll be here waiting, I promise I'm changing

I just need

—-----------

Although everything in you screams to just fall into bed and forget it you follow him down the hall anyways, watching as he throws your bag on the living room floor before marching into the kitchen and swinging the fridge door open.

Some of the magnets fall, a glass one snapping when it hits the floor, and you watch as Eddie reaches a ringed hand to snatch the pack of beer he had in the fridge.

“What are you doin-” You’re cut off, a scream tearing through you when he lifts his hand up and slams the bottle into the floor. Glass goes flying and beer spraying everywhere, and you cover your face so you don’t get hit.

“THIS WHAT YOU WANT? HUH?!” He shouts, snatching another bottle from the pack and repeating the action. This time you were not so lucky and a piece of the glass catches your arm, and then everything breaks.

Your world shatters to bits when the blood starts leaking from the wound, it wasn’t enough to actually hurt, but the idea of it hurt more. The illusion that broke finally left you broken.

This was not the Eddie you knew. And this was not the Eddie you would stay with.

Leaving him to have his fun breaking bottles you go and snatch your bag from where he threw it and watch from a safe distance as he breaks the last bottle.

When he is done he looks at you and your face is hot from the tears. “I hate you.”

“I hate you too.” He laughs.

“I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!” You scream, a cracking feeling in your chest as you make your way to the door. “You’re better off alone-”

“I AM BETTER OFF ALONE! WITHOUT YOUR ANNOYING FUCKING SELF ALWAYS NEAR ME!” He screams, and you don’t waste your breath on a reply, slamming the door behind you.

Yeah, way before I bought you the ring

We were fighting back and forth like you were wearin' the thing

Two passionate people not afraid to say what they think

Lead to passionate conversation when it's hard to agree

You know me well, sittin' on the edge of my seat

Lookin' at life, overanalyzin' everything

Always depressed, tryna find a better version of me

Searching for somethin' I know's prolly right in front of my feet

The sickening feeling was not from the hangover, that he was sure, and throwing up would do nothing to fix it for you would still be gone and he would still be alone on the living room floor.

He had proposed, almost 4 months ago, and he doesn’t remember the last time you both talked about the wedding. Had you even talked about it at all? Or had you known not to waste time on him?

The phone rings around noon and Eddie launches up to answer, panting a bit as he puts the receiver against his ears. “Y/n?”

“No, Eddie, it’s Dustin.” The voice on the end answers, disappointment filling him at the sound, though he had never been disappointed by Dustin calling before. “Everything good?”

“Oh yeah….yeah man-”

“Are you sure because last we talked you sounded pretty bad.”

“I…. just need time-”

“You say that a lot Eddie. Look, I know I’m just a freshman at Harvard…..one of the best schools EVER, but I think you really need help. Not that my opinion matters, just a straight A HARVARD student and all……”

“I don’t want to talk about-”

“How about therapy?”

“Dustin I really-”

“Steve is in therapy. And Nancy and robin, max, lucas, will,-”

“Got it. I got it. Thanks.” Before his friend could respond he hung up and lay back down, closing his eyes to stop the tears. Jesus, he had really messed things up.

Stubborn as me? Maybe not, but you're close to it

Got a lot of issues, I'm tryin' to work through 'em

Going to therapy for you's somethin' that's worth doin'

When I know you been there for me through all of my worst moments

And I know it hurts knowing that I carry this weight on my chest

Making it difficult for me to open up and connect

Lot of regrets, I apologize for all of the stress

That's not what I meant to do, you know I love you to death even if-

You didn’t come back for a few days, but Eddie was hopeful that you would considering you needed the rest of your things.

So he busied himself, cleaning and cleaning and more cleaning. Anytime he wanted a drink he went and laid down, or stared at the picture of you on his nightstand.

By the time you did come back he had the place completely spotless, and you stopped short when you saw it, and blinked at him where he sat on the couch.

He was terrified to move, terrified that if he moved you would leave and he would never see you again. So he sat still, muscles tense, as he blinked at you while you blink at him. “I…….”

Just as he expected, the peace broke. Within moments you were walking away, heading to the room and he was doomed to follow.

He stands in the doorway of the room, watching as you unpack the bag which he took as a really good sign. “I….. I don’t even know where to start.”

“Neither do I.” You mutter, rubbing your face as you move to sit on the bed. “I was way out of line for mocking you and-”

“You’re not the one that apologizes here. That’s me. You did nothing wrong-”

“I did-”

“No. I…… I have wasted so much of your time and…….I would like to tell you…..about- I want to talk about it.”

“About what?”

He takes three easy steps across the floor and sits on the bed with you, pulling his sleeve up to show some of the scars. You knew they were worse on his stomach and he seemed just fine with showing you the arm at the moment. “This is gonna sound absolutely insane……”

Even if we both break down tonight

And you say you hate me, and we go to bed angry

I know everything will be alright

I'll be here waiting, I promise I'm changing

I just need

Time (oh)

I, I need time (oh, oh)

I just need time (oh)

I, I need time (oh)

Time (oh), time (oh)

I just need time (oh)

I, I need time (oh, oh)

I just need time (oh)

I, I need time (oh)

Time (oh), time (oh)

You were waiting outside the therapist office, smacking your gum harshly in a slight attempt to amuse yourself as you waited for Eddie in his session.

You had packed a book and snacks, but the book ended up boring you and the snacks were long gone so you had taken to hanging your feet out the window to catch them in the sunlight as the radio played some crappy tune.

You hum, terribly since you had never heard the song, and closed your eyes. This was the new normal, once a week you would hang out in Eddie's van as he spent time with a therapist and after that you would go get dinner together. And you loved it.

A scream rips from you when something touches the bottom of your foot and you sit up quickly to reveal the face of Eddie. He laughs, leaning through the window to kiss you before slapping your calf lightly.

“Okay, let’s go.” He smiles, rushing around to his side and hopping in. You smile, lifting your head until he is comfortable then laying it on his lap. “Anyone ever told you how gorgeous you are?”

“Be serious.” You blush, reaching a hand up to flick him.

“I am serious, baby. Dead serious. Dead sober.”

“It just takes time.”

#eddie #munson #eddie munson #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson angst #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson love #stranger #things #stranger things #stranger things imagine #stranger things x reader

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lostinlewis · 1 year

Text

Old Flame ~ Part One

Rating: M

Words: 3534

Character: Lewis Hamilton x F!Reader

Description: You learnt so much from your first love but the most important lesson he taught you was how to deal with heartbreak, even if it takes you six years. You were almost there, you almost made it days at a time without thinking about him…that was until he turned up in the most unexpected of places.

They say you never really know love until you lose it and in your case, nothing has ever been more accurate. Had you known what love was, what love would bring and what love would take away, you would have never let it breathe. You would have suffocated every last breath of Oxygen out of love, killing it dead before it had a chance to consume you; self defence.

You never had the chance to defend yourself when love first found you, it was unexpected, quick and before you even realised it was there, it had consumed you in its entirety and even when love was gone, when the love was no longer being fed by you nor him, the bitterness of the taste of love lingered in your mouth for years afterwards.

The moment you no longer had love, you realised how much it had taken over your whole life, how consumed you were with everything love was, how much of yourself you had lost in the process of trying to be everything he wanted, love had given you life and love had taken your life away and there was absolutely nothing you could do about it.

The thing about love is it never really goes away, it doesn’t disappear, instead it festers deep inside you, bubbling under the surface and through time you weigh it down with more of life's day to day normalities, thoughts that occupied your mind enough to allow you an hour or so free of the thought of love. It’s still there though, just waiting for the perfect moment to resurface and completely fuck your brain up, reset the clock on your recovery from addiction of the very worst kind.

“Good Morning, Miss.”

The bellboy’s voice made you jump as you made your way down to the lobby, your social battery had been well and truly depleted at the conference you had been at for the past few days, the last thing you wanted to do was make any unnecessary conversation so all you could muster in response was a polite smile as you called the elevator to your floor.

You were grateful when the elevator was empty, it was 15 floors down and you wanted to savour the solitary silence of each floor before you had to put on your work mask and spend the last day of the conference acting like there was nowhere else in the world you would rather be.

You made it a whole three floors before the elevator stopped to pick up new passengers. The doors swung open and you instinctively kept your head down, to avoid eye contact with the stranger.

It took a moment for you to realise how you knew the scent that engulfed the air of the enclosed space but the moment you did, your stomach, and your heart sank. Your eyes dared to look up slowly until you saw him, staring back at you with just as much dismay.

“Hi.”

A simple word mumbled in a voice that had little confidence however it left you with a sickly feeling all the same. This couldn’t be happening, could it?

You wanted to scream, you wanted to pry open the doors with your bare hands and climb out, but there was no escape. You were trapped there, with him, for at least 12 more floors. Your brain replayed the voice line of your personal trainer telling you to always take the stairs as a quick and easy way to get some exercise, knowing that in this moment it could have also saved your life, and your sanity. Why didn’t you take the stairs?

“Hi.”

It was quite some feat how normal the word sounded as it left your lips, your mind was in meltdown and your body was a panicked mess, yet if you could just stick to that one word, he would be none the wiser.

“You look great.”

He smiled at you and it felt violent, the curl of his plump lips made you want to rip your heart out of your chest and throw it at him.

“Thanks, so do you.”

You let the conversation fall out of you without thought, and it was only a lie that needed thought, this certainly wasn’t one of those. He looked good, in fact he looked almost exactly like the man you once knew, except now age had made him more polished. If it wasn’t for the flecks of a few grey hairs in his beard you could be fooled into believing he was still 25.

The elevator bell rang as it stopped on the ground floor, your salvation had arrived, you could escape from the nightmare you had accidentally stumbled into. You felt his eyes burn into you as you walked past him, your legs felt like they were made of jelly and your vision betrayed you through panic.

All of the determination in the world to make it out of the hotel doors and into the fresh air was no match for him calling your name, as your hand reached for the handle you heard him call you above the noise of the busy lobby and you paused. You knew you should ignore it, plead the ignorance of being deafened by the crowd as you escaped him, but you couldn’t, no matter how hard you wanted to deny him further proof of life, you were powerless to his attention and so you turned to face him, your breath halted as you waited for him to meet you where you stood.

“Where are you heading? Can we go grab a coffee or something?”

This was the closest you had been in many years, there was but a breath of space between you as he asked permission to occupy more of your time. Your carnal need for him betrayed you, your eyes couldn’t help but fall to his lips, your own parting with want to kiss him, it was all you ever wanted after all.

“No can do, sorry. I have to be at a work conference. It was nice seeing you though. Take care.”

You left him standing in the lobby, walking out on him was now becoming a habit. The moment the fresh air hit you, you sprinted away as fast as you could, stopping only when your body could not physically move anymore. You collapsed up against a wall, gasping for breath. For the first time in twenty minutes it felt like you could actually breathe yet you couldn’t quite still your racing heart.

Needless to say, your day was an absolute shitshow after your encounter. You tried your best to focus on what was actually being discussed at the conference, as boring as it was you needed something to stop your mind from racing with a million thoughts of him. It didn’t work though, you couldn’t stop the thoughts, the angry thoughts of what was left unsaid, the thoughts you would never admit to, the thoughts of him, his body, his lips...of him.

Why now? Why after all this time did he have to reappear?

It felt apt that the first time in so many years you finally felt like you were becoming a person without love, that he would find his way back into your consciousness. You had worked so hard to move on, you had thrown yourself into so many different projects, both at home and at work, to find who you were as a woman, to find your purpose, you had been forced to curate a life without him the very moment he betrayed you.

“Of fucking course!”

The door of the mini fridge in your hotel room had almost been taken off of the hinges with how hard you had slammed it closed. All you wanted to do was drown the sorrows of your pitiful day, and life, yet the alcohol gods had made that impossible by not providing any.

You were limited with ways to distract yourself, ways to cheer yourself up, in your hotel room. A bubble bath so hot you thought you might pass out from the temperature, a reality TV show that’s dramatic moments paled in comparison to your own, you even attempted to sleep but it was all useless, you wanted that drink and there was only one way you were going to get it.

Entering the hotel bar with caution, you scanned your surroundings for any trace of him, only daring to venture further inside when you were certain the coast was clear. As you sipped on your rum and lemonade you smirked to yourself for being foolish enough to think he would still be there, the hotel was far too normal for someone of his status.

One drink turned into three and soon you found comfort in the poison you brought to your lips, you felt yourself relax, unwind, you felt the weight of the world disappear as you allowed yourself to take your eyes off of the entrance to the bar and lose yourself in your social media feeds.

“In all the hotel bars in the world, what are the chances?”

Lewis didn’t wait for you to acknowledge him, he didn’t need an invite to sit down at your table and invade your personal space, and your peace, for the second time today.

“Well apparently pretty high…”

You watched Lewis’ bodyguard sit just behind him as he continued to scan the bar for any sign of trouble, he had always been on high alert, even in places he never needed to be.

“You knew I was at the bar, didn’t you?”

Your deadpan expression told him nothing of how irritated you were by this revelation, you thought you had escaped him after so many years, to find yourself vulnerable to his wants once again…well, it made you feel so incredibly pathetic .

“You got me. I had Lloyd over here scout the lobby until you appeared.”

“Well that’s just fucking weird, Lewis.”

“No, not in a creepy way. I just…I just needed to see you one more time and I know tonight’s your last night here, I knew this was my last chance to see you..”

“Are you full on stalking me now or something? We haven’t spoken in years and yet you seem to know so much about me…”

You waited to see the panic on his face, to watch him stumble over his words as he tried to find a way to explain his incredibly creepy behaviour, but he didn’t. Lewis seemed confident that you wanted this attention as much as he wanted to give it to you, and a little part of you knew he was right.

“How have you been? How’s your mum?”

“Seriously Lewis, what are we doing here?”

He seemed taken aback by your unwillingness to entertain his conversation, you knew he was here with a purpose and you needed to know what that purpose was, immediately.

“What do you mean? We’re two old friends catching up, are we not?”

“Old friends?” The sarcasm in your voice had never been more obvious.

You finished the last sip of your drink and stood up, once again confirming that a reality tv show’s dramatics had nothing on your own.

“I don’t think we were ever really friends, were we?”

Much like the escape you found this morning, you walked the same path you had run earlier, breathing heavy with anxiety as your thoughts raced through your head.

Friends? After everything you had been through, after everything he had done, he thought you were friends?

It was by the river that you found a semblance of comfort, sat on the damp bench as the cool chill of the evening air surrounded you, you stared out into the water replaying scenes that lead up to the last time you saw him, scenes that you had done well to block out of mind for so long now, yet one glimpse of him and they replayed like your favourite movie.

It was in the middle of the final act replaying in your head that you heard the deep breath of the person who had sat down next to you. You didn’t even need to turn around to know that it was him, you could always tell when he was around.

“Lewis, please just go.”

There was a peace about your voice as you asked him to leave, an inevitability to your tone that meant that he had very little fight back as he insisted he stay, he was rendered mute as he actually had to think of what to say to you, for the first time in a long time.

“Did you mean what you said?”

“Yes, I want to be left alone.”

“No, what you said before, that we were never really friends?”

You finally graced him with your gaze, noticing the concern on his face you wondered if he was that deluded he thought you would count him as a friend after everything that had happened.

“Did you really think we were friends?”

“Yes, of course. You were my best friend...”

You laughed in a sarcastic tone, in disbelief of how sincere his words seemed to be. He really was the most deluded man in the world.

“Friends don’t do what you did, Lewis. Friends don’t absolutely destroy each other and then come back like nothing at all has happened. You know, most friends would have started with a sorry…”

The angst was escaping through your words and you let it, he needed to hear it.

“What did you expect me to do? You left me, remember!”

“I left you, Lewis, because I saw you that night! I saw you with her, outside of the hotel. I saw you and it broke me. Friends don’t betray each other, friends don’t…friends don’t…FUCK.”

The tears began, much to your annoyance, you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that it still bothered you yet you couldn’t stop them from flowing freely, interrupting your words.

“I was coming over to surprise you, to keep you company on the race weekend and I saw you with her. You broke me, Lewis…you destroyed me.”

“So instead of talking to me, instead of trying to work it out, you just packed your bags and left?”

You could see the glistening in the corner of his eyes too and a small part of you felt a pang of guilt, like you should stop talking to lessen the blow to him. Even after he destroyed you, you only cared to look after him.

“Talk to you? About what? I saw what I needed to see, unless you’re now going to tell me that you were innocent and what I thought I saw was wrong? That I didn’t see your hand placed on the small of her back as you led her up the stairs, that I didn’t see the way she turned to look at you. I know that look, Lewis, I created that look. She knew you as I knew you, and that destroyed me.”

He didn’t speak for a moment, his face reading a picture of shock as some of the gravity of his actions weighed down on his conscience.

“Was I wrong, Lewis?”

His eyes dropped to his lap before he shook his head. He was ashamed, remorseful, this was a side to him you hadn’t seen before but it was too late.

“I had to go, I had to leave.”

You both sat in silence for a while. You had given up trying to tell him to leave you alone, you knew he wouldn’t listen anyway. You replayed the night in question in your head. You had been so excited to surprise him, you had been away for a week prior with work and you knew he was stressed, what with it being his almost home Grand Prix in Monaco.

He never slept in the apartment you shared when it was race weekend, he needed to focus so he stayed in a hotel, always the same hotel. You pulled up at the traffic lights outside of the hotel and that’s when you saw them.

He was holding her intimately as he led her into the lobby. It was only a brief moment, all of ten seconds but you saw it. Shock immediately took over and you drove back to your apartment in auto pilot.

Within an hour you had your bags packed and a flight booked back to London. The image of him leading that girl into the hotel was the last time you saw him, before this morning. You have never contacted him since. As soon as you landed back in London you changed your number, you stayed with a friend he didn’t know until you could get your own place and you disappeared from his life, like you had never existed. A ghosting in its most brutal form, the very least he deserved.

“I still think about you everyday. It’s been over six years and I still think about you every single day.”

“I don’t.”

“Ouch.”

“Do you want me to? It took me three years to even be able to look at a picture of you without breaking down in tears, do you know how hard it is to avoid pictures of you in the UK?”

He smirked, he knew how famous he was.

“It took me four years to not think of you every morning when I woke up. It took me five years to stop hating you. And here we are, the sixth year without you and all that’s left is distant memories that only pop up when a picture of you is forced in front of me unwillingly. You broke me, Lewis. I’m finally, finally, almost back to normal and that’s when you decide to reappear in my life.”

“I didn’t plan this, I had no idea you would be here. For what it’s worth, and I know my words are probably not worth much any more, I am truly sorry. You were…are, the love of my life.”

He was wrong, his words were worth everything, and his revelation was like a sucker punch to your stomach. It would have been easier to hear he hated you, that he had pretended to love you all that time, you could handle that.

“I better head back, I’m leaving early in the morning.”

“We are staying in the same hotel. I’ll walk back with you.”

The walk back to the hotel was awkward, it was impossible for it to be anything but that. He tried to make conversation, you batted each question away without wanting to reveal anything to him. In your mind, he hadn’t earned the right to know you anymore, he had lost that the moment he decided to fuck someone else.

He walked you all the way to the outside of your room, despite you insisting you could say goodbye in the lobby, he refused, citing his ‘being a gentleman’. He wasn’t impressed with your laughter in response.

“Well, goodnight Lewis.”

You didn’t wait for him to respond, you turned to put your key in your door, desperate for the barrier the door would create between you both.

“Wait, please.”

He took hold of your hand and you felt his incredibly soft skin for the first time in six years. His touch was still enough to take your breath away.

You lost yourself for a moment, his hand on yours brought back a thousand memories before reality crashed the party in your mind once again.

“Don’t do this, please.”

“I’m not going to do anything, I promise. But I can’t say goodbye to you. I never thought I would see you again but yet here we are. Please, can I have your number or something?”

“No, Lewis. Please don’t do this. I spent so long trying to get over you, I can’t do this again.”

You threw your head back so it hit the door, the last semblance of strength you held onto was fast slipping away.

“I promise I have no intentions behind asking you for your number. I just...I can’t stand the thought that this might be the last time we ever speak.”

You realised that he was still holding your hand but you didn’t pull it away, instead you found comfort in the familiarity of his touch.

“Surely there’s a part of you, even if it is the tiniest little part, that feels the same?”

You didn’t reply, not at first. Instead you held your gaze with him at that moment. A part of you wanted to disappear into your hotel room, close the door and never see him again but another part, the part that was winning, longed to have the man you once would have given your life for back, in some form.

“How about this, you give me your number and if, and I’m not promising I will, I ever get the urge to reconnect, I will?”

“Deal.”

You handed him your phone to type his number in.

“I’ll be waiting for your call.”

And just as quickly as he came back into your life, he disappeared once again.

PART TWO

#lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton one shot #Lewis Hamilton fanfic #Lewis Hamilton x you #Lewis Hamilton fanfiction #lewis #ex #Old Flame

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wonlouvre · 2 years

Text

four: awakening

pairing: doctor!mingyu x potter!female reader

genre: fluff, angst, mature 18+

word count: 3.6k+

WARNINGS: age gap (mingyu is 34 while oc is 27), mentions of food & eating, smut (nothing descriptive though), marriage and meeting the parents kind of talk (let me know what i missed please!)

💌: finally, part four. i sincerely apologize for the long wait. a lot has happened over the months that passed, but we are finally here. thank you for patiently waiting. please be mindful that their relationship has taken a leap on this part. i will probably write one more part, then an epilogue. we’re nearing the end :( please enjoy this part and tell me what you think about it! <3

—

You keep thinking about it. The last conversation you had with Mingyu, that is. You know he means well and he’s nothing but a sweetheart about it. He’s not necessarily putting any pressure on your shoulders to give him an answer immediately. But, in the past five months you have known your boyfriend, you know he’s going to want to move forward. Level up. And that’s a really good thing. In fact, you want the same thing. It’s just… you’re not yet ready.

“What were you going to tell me again?” Seokmin asks, mindlessly flipping through the binder of artists that’s going to participate in one of his upcoming exhibits.

You swallow the lump at the back of your throat and slowly release a breath. Your eyes look up from the floor and your lips finally answer, “Mingyu wants to introduce me to his parents.”

Seokmin’s hands pauses and by the way his lips purses, you know you got him thinking as well. He closes the thick binder, propping his elbows on top as he clasps his hands together.

“He did?” He asks, needing some confirmation as if it would do any help.

Well, Mingyu did not exactly say so, but it was along the lines of, “He said, “My mom would love you.””

“Oh,” Seokmin utters, cheeks blowing like a puffer fish as he nods. “Is there something wrong about that?”

You bite your lip and sigh, defeated. “Nothing at all.”

“But, there’s something to be afraid of, I guess?”

Bingo.

“Y/N,” your friend calls for you and you’re quite aware of what he’s about to say next. “Introducing you to his parents doesn’t immediately translate to getting married in an instant.”

You frustratingly nod. You don’t disagree with him. But, what if you want to marry Mingyu? Isn’t introducing yourself to the rest of his family part of that? And now that your boyfriend seems to be giving you the signs that he wants what you want, why are you afraid? Why are you suddenly stuck and reluctant to move forward just like he does?

You hear Seokmin finally stand from his desk and make a beeline to where you’re sitting. He exhales a breath as he pinches the bridge of his nose. You’re grateful for him trying to help you in the kindest way possible because he knows what you’ve been through. But at the same time, you’re dreading his next words because no matter how harsh nor kind it will sound, he’s always right.

“Talk to Mingyu,” he says, his tone final.

Your heart beats a hundred times faster at what he just said.

Seokmin nods firmly as he sees the conflict in your eyes. The conflict in your eyes screaming about the hows and whats. The conflict in your eyes that’s fearing for the worst of them all. The conflict in your eyes that’s begging to not go through the same heartbreak all over again. The conflict in your eyes that’s protecting Mingyu’s heart.

Talk to Mingyu.

—

Mingyu is simply the happiest man to be with you. Scratch that, he’s simply the happiest man to have met you. Maybe it’s what every person would say if they finally meet the one that they’re more than content with. Or maybe, it’s just him. He really doesn’t know.

That being said, he also just wants things to be simple with you. He trusts that you’re committed to the relationship you have with him. After all, you were the one brave enough to ask him to be his boyfriend. That’s why he’s also brave enough to mention, little by little, his intentions on introducing you to his family that he believes without a doubt would love you.

It started when he went to your shop after his shift to pick you up. It became a routine for him whenever his schedule is free and even though you have insisted that you could manage to go home by yourself, the stubborn yet caring person in him disagreed.

You were doing some last minute cleaning as he waited for you to finish. He obediently sat at the counter and just watched you fondly, eyes following your every single move. It wasn’t a moment of realization. It was a gradual thought that smoothly slid inside not only in his head, but in his heart as well.

Mingyu wants to marry you.

“My mom would love you.”

He said it, convinced that it’s the best way to start the conversation. To take the first step. Interrupting your quiet hums and busy hands. He said it and you stood up straight, eyes confusedly blinking, lips awkwardly smiling.

And, he’s regretting it now because your reaction seems indifferent.

“You two,” Seokmin grimaces as he sees his friend upon his entrance to the quiet coffee shop. “What am I? A friend that’s stuck between a couple that can’t seem to figure their shit out.”

“Hey!” Mingyu whisper shouts. “Who said we can’t figure our shit out?”

Seokmin rolls his eyes and sits on the vacant chair on the other side of the table. He doesn’t go to hospital coffee shops often, not that he has reasons to thankfully. But he must say, it’s fairly cozy. None of that though, he’s here to visit and help his friend who looks like he hasn’t showered or slept for two days.

“You know what,” Seokmin says, “You’re the one who looks like shit.”

Mingyu almost decks his friend.

“Alright, alright, geez.” Seokmin raises his hand, finally ready to take his friend’s dilemma seriously.

“Has Y/N spoken to you yet?” Mingyu asks.

“She has and I won’t tell you anything about it.”

Mingyu groans, but he understands. It’s not like you’re not talking to him. In fact, nothing has really drastically changed in your relationship. You’re not saying anything about it, but he just knows that he put you in an uncomfortable position and he wants to fix it.

“Don’t worry about it Mingyu,” Seokmin assures him. “Y/N will talk to you about it sooner than you think.”

Mingyu nods, understanding what he’s trying to say. “I just can’t lose her ‘Min.”

“I know and trust me, she doesn’t wanna lose you too.”

Mingyu badly needs to talk to you.

—

Mingyu finds you sitting in front of your pottery wheel and he’s going to sound annoying, but you honestly take his breath away. Looking so gorgeous in his eyes despite the sweat trickling down your forehead and hair loosely tied to not get in the way. And when you pause what you’re doing to check who has arrived, he swears he could rip his heart out just to give it to you because of how bright your eyes shine upon seeing him. He’s smiling as he drapes his coat on the counter before rolling his sleeves up.

Meanwhile, your clay stained hands hang in the air as you wait for him to come closer. He does immediately, though and that makes you smile just like him. You stand on your tippy toes to give his lips a sweet peck, a welcome of some sort.

It’s only a brief yet sweet gesture and Mingyu already feels like he can take on the world.

“I could kiss you longer, but I’m in the middle of something,” you joke, making your boyfriend giggle. His nose nudges against yours, his lips giving yours another smooch.

You sit back down in front of the wheel without noticing your boyfriend already rolling his sleeves further up to his forearms, getting ready to join you even without the invitation. As you continue what you’re doing, Mingyu is already taking the small stool behind you to sit on.

“Maybe you should go first–” Your sentence goes unfinished, gasping in surprise at the sudden warmth engulfing your whole body. Mingyu’s lean arms wrap themselves around your waist while his thighs, which are as lean as his arms, settle on each side of yours.

“Hmm?” He nonchalantly hums, nuzzling his nose on the crook of your neck. “You were saying?”

Your hands remain frozen as your heart pumps blood so fast, you’re sure your face is not the only part of your body that’s warm.

“Babe?”

You’re not that strong, you realize.

You take a deep breath and press on the wheel again, acting like you weren’t just about to melt into a puddle. “I was saying, maybe you should go home first. It might take a long time to finish this vase.”

Mingyu audibly whines, you can feel his lips against your skin. “I want to stay with you.”

“What’s gotten you so clingy today?” You tease, leaning slightly back to him, your back meeting his chest.

“Nothing. Just really want to spend time with you,” he replies, bashful yet honest.

You have thought about it. The last conversation you had with Mingyu about meeting his parents. Again, he didn’t exactly say he wanted to introduce you to them. But, you’re more than aware of how your boyfriend became extra careful around you as if he committed a grave crime after that and you want to ease his mind from worries because he doesn’t deserve to feel insecure about anything at all.

You have thought about it and, “Then, be useful and help me out with this vase.”

“What?” Mingyu asks, tone so lost and confused.

Your smile is small and nervous as you continue talking.

“What design do you think your mother would prefer? Flowers? Animals?”

Mingyu’s arms tenses, but doesn’t let go of you. When he doesn’t answer, he hears you continue still.

“How about colors? White would be good, right? Or would a pop of color be better?”

“Y/N,” Mingyu calls for your attention, voice suddenly stern.

“Hmm?” Now it’s your turn to hum, bravely tilting your head to the left to meet his eyes. “What do you think?”

Mingyu knows you’re not one to play around his feelings, you having a hatred against such. But, he can’t help but wonder if you’re being serious with him right now because he swears he could go down on one knee and ask your hand for marriage with what you have been saying.

“Are you saying you want to meet my mom?” Mingyu finally asks, his eyes lovingly gazing on yours. “How about my dad?”

You pause to think, biting your lip along the process. “I could ask Seokmin to find me a painting. You’ve mentioned your dad has a small collection, right?”

Mingyu smiles and leans closer to kiss your lips, but pulls away all too quickly. “I need an answer, babe.”

You smile back and kiss his lips as well. “I’d love to meet your parents, Mingyu.”

“Okay.” Mingyu nods once before kissing you again and this time, he takes it slow.

He’s aware your neck is craned uncomfortably that’s why he carefully maneuvers your body to face his properly. Although you're still sitting on your stool, his arm is now cradling your back while his free hand caresses your cheek as he kisses you deeply.

“Mingyu.” You try to pull away, but he’s relentless. “Let me wash up so we could go.”

Again, he’s relentless. Kissing and kissing you, rendering you breathless. You let him be, wrapping your arms around his neck but at the same time making sure you don’t let your hands wander anywhere else on his skin.

Your kisses become fervent under the dim light of the store and it doesn’t fail to cross your mind what if someone suddenly enters. Your store is yet to be closed after all. But, Mingyu’s teeth nipping on your bottom lip hypnotizes you, eliciting a whimper from you.

Mingyu is no different, groaning at your moans and whines. It’s impossible for his body to not overheat, like it’s about to burst into flames.

“Mingyu,” you call again, leaning back.

Your boyfriend whines and dives once again. But you move further back. That doesn’t stop him though, trailing kisses from your cheeks to your jawline down to your neck instead. It’s not helping that you can’t touch your boyfriend because of the drying clay on your hands.

“Okay. I really need to wash up now.”

Mingyu pouts, but stops nonetheless. “Fine. But, be quick.”

You kiss the mole on his nose and nod. “Promise.”

—

The first time you stepped foot inside Mingyu’s apartment, you immediately told him that his taste is sexy. You actually blurted it out, but you needed to keep your dignity intact so you’re going to lie that you described it in a sophisticated manner. But, back to his apartment. He just chuckled embarrassingly at your words, touring you around and telling you the how abouts.

This time around, nothing is different. You have been to his apartment countless times before, but rarely stayed over. It’s still sexy. He’s still sexy. You can’t help but ogle at him as he places your takeout dinner on the dining table and removes his coat to drape on the chair.

It’s pretty late in the night and you hate yourself for having an impression that you will sleep over. It’s not that you don’t want to sleep with him. Mingyu’s mattress is the best mattress you have ever slept on. It didn’t take you a while to fall into deep slumber the first time you laid on it. Plus, it’s no secret your boyfriend’s arms are the warmest blanket.

It’s just that there’s something in you, something searingly hot and tense, that makes you believe you’ll do more than sleep tonight.

“Babe?” Mingyu calls for you and you're snapped out of your trance. “Are you okay?”

You blink away your thoughts and nod. “Yeah. Just… I’m going to wash my hands first then I’ll join you.”

Mingyu smiles, proud that you already know the drill. If he knew what you’re going through at the moment, you think you’ll combust. But, if you only knew what he's going through, it would be a whole different story.

You’re not the only one with the heart racing and whole body heating up. Mingyu thinks he’s about to lose his mind over the events that occurred at your store earlier. He knows he’s exaggerating when all you said was you wanted to meet his parents. Well, you kissed so that’s an added factor. But, the two of you always kiss! What’s so special about tonight that’s making him all anxious yet excited at the same time?

You return not more than five minutes later and you find Mingyu opening a bottle of wine. He even looks good by just doing such a simple act with his sleeves rolled up to his forearms, a few buttons of his loose. You’re most definitely gone.

You pinch your hip to wake yourself up. Now is really not the time to be hot and bothered.

“Wine together with tteokbokki and fried chicken?” You ask, finally taking a seat. “Interesting.”

Your boyfriend playfully shrugs his shoulders, pouring you a glass before planting a kiss on the crown of your head. He takes the chair beside you, hands busy opening the containers one by one.

Dinner is served and the two of you become preoccupied on making sure both of you are eating enough, mindlessly putting food on each other’s plates as you chat. Finally, the tension, although still lingering, relaxes a little.

“Hey.” Mingyu tugs at your chair, pulling you closer to his side. “About our conversation earlier. I don’t want you to feel pressured into doing anything you don’t want to. I can wait, I promise.”

Your lips grow into a smile and you’re suddenly feeling warm all over again. You place your glass back on the table before gently holding his cheeks with your hands, chin tilting up to press a chaste kiss on the corner of his lips.

“It’s nothing like that,” you assure him, thumb rubbing soft circles on his cheekbone. “It’s not like I’m introducing myself to them tomorrow. I just wanted you to know that I’m more than happy to meet them someday or… I don’t know. Soon?”

“Okay,” that’s all Mingyu says with an enthralled smile before leaning closer to your face, lips sealing yours with his. Your eyes close in bliss, basking in the feeling you’re sure only Mingyu can ever make you feel. You have figured it out, it’s just that you don’t want to go ahead of yourself.

You’re hoping Mingyu is feeling it too.

You return Mingyu’s kisses softly, but your boyfriend is eager. His kisses grow passionate, almost knocking your chair down with his body wishing to be closer and closer. You gasp, hands pushing at his firm chest to pull away. He’s as surprised as you are, you can’t help but giggle.

“There’s sauce all over your lips,” you point out, wiping his lips with your thumb.

What he does next is beyond your imagination.

Mingyu holds your wrist, preventing you from having your hand back. You look at him confusedly. But when you catch the different glint of his eyes, you’re hypnotized. Once he senses you relax, he kisses your thumb. You swallow the lump at the back of your throat. You’re afraid you just liked what he did.

Mingyu doesn’t engulf your thumb with his mouth, but his kisses, at least thrice, drops a heated sensation down to your body.

“Stay over tonight?”

It scares you how quickly you say yes.

–

Mingyu makes you feel small from time to time. You don’t mean this in a bad way, you promise. It’s just that, sometimes, when he gives you all of his attention, you grow bashful. It makes you wonder about what’s so special that he sees in you that he never fails to maintain eye contact, regardless of what you’re doing.

And tonight, right at this moment, he’s making you feel small over again with added warmth. You swear, your heart has never beat so fast. You keep on swallowing the invisible lump at the back of your throat as you try your best to scoot up on his bed. You're sure your palms are already sweating and it’s not helping that you’re still looking up to Mingyu’s eyes as he joins you.

Mingyu’s huge hand smooths over from your knee to your thigh, making your breath hitch. He gives you a small smile, kissing your cheek lovingly.

“We can just go to sleep. I don’t mind,” he says and that catches you in a state of panic.

“No,” you immediately say. I want this.

Your boyfriend tried to hold it, but you can see the smirk forming on his lips. “Will you tell me what you want then?”

“I–...” You barely utter, word failing to come out of your mouth. You bite your bottom lip and take a deep breath, closing your eyes. When you open them again, you see the patience evident on Mingyu’s face and that’s more than enough to give you the courage to say what you want.

“Can you… can you take this off?” You whisper, toying with the collar of his long sleeves. “Please?”

Mingyu chuckles and you almost call him out on it, but he beats your open mouth from saying anything further by kissing you.

You and Mingyu have had your fair share of intimate moments over the course of your relationship. Hot make out sessions that last who knows how long. Soft touches that are not slow to turn into something heavy, leaving the two of you a hot mess. They are all deeds not out of the ordinary for the two of you.

Sex, however, is something that the two of you almost touched on. If it wasn’t for Mingyu’s emergency calls or Seokmin cockblocking the two of you, you two would have been far off right now.

But, that’s the thing. You are here right now on Mingyu’s bed. Mingyu is also here with you right now, lean and strong arms holding his upper body up to not crush yours as he continues kissing you passionately.

You didn’t even notice his long sleeves getting discarded, left to be on the floor.

You’re panting when Mingyu pulls away briefly to make you sit up. Embarrassingly enough, your mouth waters at the sight of his toned chest and abdomen, your fingers tracing over them.

Mingyu smiles, holding your cheeks to gently make you look at him and answer his question. “Can I take this off?”

He’s referring to your blouse and well, if he’s already without a top on, you might as well take yours off. After all, you do want this.

You nod and that has Mingyu shaking his head. Your eyebrows furrow, knowing what he wants.

“Take them off, please.”

“Good girl,” Mingyu praises, hands quick to their job. Your pupils blow instantly and before you could react, he’s kissing you again.

The long night continues without knowing the passing time. It wasn’t your concern if you have to wake up early tomorrow nor was it your boyfriend’s, lips making sure covering every inch of your body with his kisses (of course, with love bites here and there).

You’re no different anyway. Stopping him from taking your pants off and pleading him if you could make him feel good before he takes care of you. Who is Mingyu to deny you?

Mingyu was a panting mess after you made him cum, but that didn’t stop him from pulling you up and smashing his lips against yours. From then on, he took matters into his own hands, leading you to pleasure that has you writhing all through the night.

—

tags:

@jackiejackkk @lovelywoo @hoe4wonwoo @boogyuu @kukiyu @lottogyu @multi-101 @tinastine @shujiloey @sweet-shiner @studywithtuna @shaffystyle @angelarin @unhaengiichi @gabii04 @lumierelavie @thecutiepieme @nochujimbles @malix28 @happy-wonho @mariellechrysanthemum @fancypoisonapple @roh-ji @seokgyustudios @drama-1998-girl @kpopssuregi @kpop-stuff-only @laconic-abditory @justasoftstan @boowanie @october-rain-love @d-noona @gaebestie @limkiwi @versacewoo @grannysdirtbag @sadcrescentmoon @cutieedeer @viv-i-a-n @walkedinafragileline @aceloveslove @maknaecooky97 @glazedpopcorn @rawrmameh @bythe8 @ohchangyu @tinastine @loeywoo @strikingbluexyz @cloudysannie @graykageyama @skywoozi @sokooks @1uv1ygyu @kyeomsgcf @jeonjona @mbbmonsta @scoupsnotscoops @ihatethisblog1 @taestrwbrry @moonlightgodes @wooedbywonu @mingyvie @wonwoosecretcat @l3liy @perplexinggg @swinterr @habitsofheaven @jaehyuns-peaches @tsukiiism @feliceline @justadreamingirl28 @rocketqueenbabyy @sailorjoonies @yunohyun @yzekim @shush15 @sweetheartcsc

@kimnorang @soonchanshua @sunnosmoon @hvcdrms @jungkookislegal @sashamifasolla @flwrsol @justnatys @needmoresleep @vixxieroxx @fairydosii @gyuromiis @simplymeer @gyusi @naegasuhosh @notsushitrashbutwonutrash @bluemoontel @lalalaylaylay @caiihyu @xmisskwonsoonyoung @ourstarrywonder @jenodaze @dowoonwoodealer @everyw0nu @lucidhao @maltagoyaluvr @happyriel @gointothesky @miuangl @vasayyy @smilejimvn @chanpvlento @ayaxsstuff @flowerofanhours @doublejeon @lovelybluemoonlight @artsenthusastk77 @distinguishedpeanutspy @inyourdreamsmaybe @mememuri @wonufication @gojosd @dktwin @mswenjun @min9yuldaengie @amariroses @synqras @this-cool-chick @everhyuck @zootopiasthings @urfavmommy @sunflwrhyuk @bokutosabyowll @degreenandfangirling @danielcastellon @biancaness @kyunlov @blueevelvt @briarrrose28 @dumbmidnightthoughts @yukkaa @r3zgirl @juye6n @pastel-andme

please do tell me if you’re not listed here! (some urls don’t get tagged and i really don’t know why :( sorry!)

434 notes · View notes

wing-ed-thing · 9 months

Text

Cycle (Kiba x Reader)

Request:

Word Count: 1.5k

Tags/Warnings: Pet Injury, Description of Pet Death, Grief, Euthanasia, Mention of Cremation, Depression, Fluff, Cute Puppies in Training that will live long lives, No Reader Pronouns

Notes: Please proceed with caution and ensure that you are curating your internet experience for yourself and your own mental health. These scenes were written based off of my own experiences with pet loss. I will add a *** when the dog death scene is over. The end is cute though.

*** Death Scene Start ***

She wasn’t going to make it.

You had a feeling, running next to her stretcher for as long as possible as the emergency vets at the Inuzuka Animal Hospital rushed her away. A pair of doors stopped you, an employee telling you that you couldn’t go any farther, a firm hand on your shoulder. The small, circular window reflected the ghost of your puffy-red eyes back at you, wavered back and forth as the doors flapped open and closed.

You didn’t remember Kiba bursting in through the front doors. You didn’t recognize him yelling, making a scene in the lobby as he demanded to know where you were. And then he enveloped you, suddenly, knocking you out of whatever daze you were in. Kiba held you tight, still in his bedclothes. His jacket had been tossed on, and his shoes hung off the backs of his heels. You buried your face in the fur lining and cried.

“It’ll be okay,” he said, trying to be optimistic. Your brother was always good at being optimistic, quickly rattling off compliments about your companion’s strength and being an Inuzuka. You thought he even cracked an offhand joke, but you were too out of it to register. You cut him off partway through.

“Not this time,” you whispered. You shook your head, smearing tears across the fur of Kiba’s jacket. “It’s bad. It’s really bad, Kiba.”

He held you as you broke down.

You cried, then stopped. Kiba brought you a warm drink. You sat and cried some more.

It was the morning when they told you there was nothing they could do to save her, and she took her last breaths in the gardens not too long after.

You brought her there in the early morning hours, just as the sun broke the horizon. Fatigue pulled at the bottoms of your eyes as the early sun draped over the flowers. Kiba sat somewhere nearby, watching as the vet prepared to take the pain from your poor friend.

You held your companion in your lap, trying to commit the texture of her coat to memory— as if you hadn’t combed your fingers through her fur hundreds of times before. A compilation of coiled bandages formed a thick mat around her stomach. Parts of the white fabric had already stained red.

You held her as the vet shaved your good girl’s leg, and as day broke, she was gone. The vet told you as much, and some of you didn’t believe it. You held your companion up to your chest, heartbreaking as her head flopped to the side. Someone had told you not to look at her eyes; perhaps it was Kiba. Maybe it was the vet. You looked anyway, hoping deep down in some part of you that something miraculous had happened.

You couldn’t place it.

You couldn’t place exactly what left her eyes that made her so devoid of life.

You could have held her for an eternity in that garden, but at some point, you had to let her go. At some point, the vet had to take her. And at some point, you had to watch as she was laid down in a great basket to be taken off for cremation.

Only when the vet and her assistant began to take your dog away did you realize that you still held her collar. You had taken it sometime in the morning's chaos, clutching it in a death grip. You took a step.

“Wait,” you called, voice cracking. You took another step. “Her collar. She has to have her collar.”

You knelt over the basket, hands shaking as you fastened it. Tears fell from your face like raindrops, and as they completely overtook your vision, Kiba’s hands came over yours. He said nothing as he helped you buckle the collar.

“We can wait,” the vet said gently, offering you a light touch to your shoulder. You wanted to shake your head, some silly idea that you should be strong at that moment. Maybe you had something to prove to yourself. Kiba’s head rose in your peripheral.

“Yeah, maybe just another second?”

You cried harder as they lowered the basket back to the ground.

Your brother, the only one who could respond to your frantic calls, was there for you.

*** Death Scene End ***

You stayed in bed for a few days.

Kiba had brought you lunch the day your companion passed, but that had been the extent of your activity. Every bone in your body begged you to stay curled up under your covers, and that’s where you remained. You drifted in and out of exhaustion, going for rounds of crying before starkly staring at the ceiling as you replayed your mission.

You replayed it over and over in crippling, ripping sessions of self-reflection, daydreaming about ways it could have gone differently.

A knock sounded at your bedroom door. You didn’t bother to answer, and Kiba didn’t wait for your response to let himself in. He opened the door gingerly, poking his head in before he entered and closed it behind him. Kiba sat on the floor, arms crossed at the edge of your mattress.

“When’s the last time you ate?” he spoke softly. “Or… used the bathroom or… maybe a shower?” Several members of your clan had been through to visit you, but none more than Kiba. Perhaps it was the protective big brother in him, or maybe it was because he witnessed your pain firsthand. Tsume hadn’t been nearly as gentle, as war-hardened as she was. You shook your head, burying a bit into the covers. “Please, I want you to take care of yourself. Would you let me help?”

“I-I, uh…” You hiccuped, voice strained. “I don’t want to see anyone right now. I’m sorry, Kiba. It’s not you…” He sighed, slumping against your bed as he let his head hang.

“I take it Mom was through here.” You hiccupped again.

“Like a tornado.”

Meeting his eye was the first time in days you had remotely cracked a smile. Kiba held an almost mischievous expression, a softness mixed with something unreadable, which he held in his eyes as he stood.

“Don’t want to see anyone. Got it.”

You didn’t understand what that meant and were too tired to ask. Before you could muster up the energy, he was gone. You turned on your opposite side, ready to snuggle back into your nest of blankets.

When your door creaked again, you assumed it was Kiba. You had fallen asleep, and your room had gone dark by the time you woke up. A golden light cast itself from the hallway into the wall you were facing. You didn’t bother turning, and with a slow stretch of your legs, you snuggled back into your bed.

Until you heard a thud against the frame of your bed, it was a light sound, like glass.

You shot up in bed, disoriented, as you scrambled to the side. And there, sitting and waiting for you, was a puppy. A small bowl of plain rice had been strapped to her head, a small dish towel folded under the base to keep her from getting burned. She looked up at you with a wide, round gaze, a small amount of crust built up around the inner parts of her eye. A black vest with the word “TRAINING” written in capital letters almost dwarfed her body. She held a pair of wrapped chopsticks in a container in her mouth, her curved tail wagging excitedly as she could barely restrain her paw tapping.

And you laughed, tears rolling down your cheeks as you did. In an instant, your messanger was upon you. You quickly snatched the bowl from the top of her head before it fell, the towel left behind on the floor. You let her lick your face, which she did in earnest, letting out a few snorts as she did so. She got in a long, determined sniff before you managed to sit up, ruffling the black fur on the top of her head and the white fluff of her underbelly.

You didn’t notice Kiba out in the hallway with a collection of other training puppies just on the other side of your ajar door. He knelt, peering in, half-heartedly trying to keep his gathered hoard from jumping on him. He snatched up one by the vest, positioning him in the doorway.

“Okay, you’re up!” he ordered in a hushed whisper, letting the hyperactive shinobi dog in training launch into your room. Kiba hoped that this is what you meant.

Thank you to all who liked, reblogged, followed, and supported. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.

Notes: The black and white one with the rice was my puppy. Rest in peace, Jack and all the other furry friends, near and dear to our hearts.

#kiba x reader #kiba inuzuka x reader #kiba inuzuka #kiba #naruto x reader #naruto #naruto x you #naruto x y/n #x you #x reader #reader insert #naruto fanfiction #naruto fanfic #tw animal death #cw animal death #tw depression #cw depression

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johnandrasjaqobis · 1 year

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okay time to actually make a proper post about this, hey u Neverafter fans, the season is over and was glorious and now. perhaps. you find yourself wanting more dungeons and dragons that delves into horror.

because come on, the death, the briars, the corruption, the chance for death at every turn, it's dope

may I then draw your attention to the Fool and Scholar podcast, d&d actual play, Dark Dice

Six travelers set out searching for a town's missing children. Their journey leads them into the ruinous domain of the Nameless God. Even if they do manage to return, they will never be the same.

like. holy shit my guys, Dark Dice is so good. Fool and Scholar has won a frankly insane number of podcast awards (including a fully Webby) for their shows, for everything from writing to music to sound design, and all of it shines in this podcast. Originally played as an ice breaker before the cast of another of their shows (The White Vault) met for a live performance, Dark Dice has taken on a life of its own and it is a masterpiece.

Travis, the DM/sound designer, edits the actual table recordings extensively to cut down on the slow moments (especially in combat) of doing math or rule clarifying for the new players, but leaves in the little bits of ridiculous table talk that can't be avoided even in a horror campaign. All npcs are fully voiced by other actors, longer bits of dialogue are sometimes rerecorded for better clarity, but the whole story is just as the game was played and it makes the show straddle the line between actual play and just a full on audio drama.

And as I said. good lord, this is a horror campaign.

There is not, I will note, nearly quite the levity that D20 brings, though imo that does make the jokes and ongoing bits all the funnier. The stakes are high -- higher than the characters have any concept of at the start -- and death is a very real threat at all times. Travis made his own critical hit chart to roll on that can have devastating consequences (because you might get an even better hit than you expected on an enemy with a roll, but they can also just as easily crit against you), there's a stress mechanic similar to Call of Chtulhu's that can steadily make the DM an unreliable narrator, have a character questioning what they're really seeing, even turning on the party, etc etc

anyway. Dark Dice is incredible. content warnings are included (and should be minded) at the end of every episode description wherever you happen to find the podcast. They have free transcripts for every episode on their Patreon. Jeff Goldblum (yes that Jeff Goldblum) plays with them in season 2 because Travis decided on a whim to write a nice email and then people just kept not telling him no.

Get your next horror dnd fix. Meet the absolute asshole that is The Silent One. Give Dark Dice a shot.

(and if you are perhaps into the idea of running this game yourself well, Domain of the Nameless God is currently under a revamp but should be available again soon, I have run it two times now -- two and a half if you include the speedrun that was absolute chaos -- and it is a deep and heartbreaking and immersive story to subject your table to)

#part of me wants to go more into some of the horror stuff but like......it's So Much going in blind #and i think it's worth it to just know it's Horror and see where Travis goes with that #neverafter #dimension 20 #dark dice #(pls message me if you want me to ramble about this more in detail i love this show so much)

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tarabyte3 · 1 year

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Reprieve

Fandom: Andor

Characters/pairings: Kino Loy, past Kino Loy x OFCs, past Kino Loy x OMCs

One shot (846 words)

AO3 link

Summary: Kino Loy finds reprieve in his memories every night while lying in his prison cell.

Warnings: Explicit rating, masturbation, hand job, sex, PiV, anal sex, oral sex, infidelity, prison

A/N: This is the very first Kino fic I ever wrote. Originally posted to AO3 November 18, 2022. It's a short, introspective piece where he thinks back on his past relationships as masturbation material. Also I made him bi because why not? So there are descriptions of sexual encounters with men and women. Enjoy!

A part of Kino thought it was sad and pathetic that he looked forward to this every night, but he worked hard. Had been locked up there for years with no comfort or touch of another person except born from necessity or violence. And though he could see the light at the end of the tunnel, as faint as it still was, he had no one waiting for him when he got out.

So every night he laid on his hard mattress pad and tried not to think of parts or numbers or keeping forty nine men in line. Instead he thought of feminine hips and masculine hands, of tongues and moans, and he silently thrust into his own hand until he came in hot streaks across his belly.

He thought of his first girlfriend and the way she had tentatively stroked him, not quite getting the rhythm or pressure right, but it was his first handjob so he still finished in an embarrassingly short amount of time. Before prison, he hadn't thought about it in decades, but here every memory of touch and release was precious so he tried to recall how her hand had felt. Tried to recall how she looked up at him, shy and flushed, unsure of herself, but emboldened by his groans and the feeling of him twitching in her fist.

He thought of his first boyfriend. A co-worker from his first job. The two of them had fumbled around with much more expertise with their hands and enthusiasm with their mouths until they had found that rhythm as well. That had eventually led to fucking each other like they had just discovered sex. Truthfully, they had, in a way. He'd never buried himself inside another person or been filled and used before him. There had been a moment where he believed he could do that for the rest of his life and be happy—until the novelty wore off. Then they realized they didn't have much in common outside of bending each other over beds and chairs and desks, and then showing up to work at the same place.

After that he had fallen in love for the first time and sex became more than release. It had been prayer and worship. The thrill of seeing another person undone beneath you while your heart soared and your fingers itched to clutch them to you and never let go. But he hadn't loved Kino in the same way Kino had loved him, so then he had also felt true heartbreak for the first time.

To soothe his pain he'd sought out company in the arms of someone else. Found her in a cantina, and she had fallen to her knees in the bathroom and taken him so deeply into her mouth and throat that she had swallowed around him and driven him nearly cross eyed. He'd come, fully buried and hips pressed firmly against her lips, with a quiet curse. Then the high had worn off and left him feeling worse than before. As he dressed, he said an awkward thank you before scurrying out and never seeing her again.

He had a few more partners, a few more awkward fumbles, a few more loves lost and hearts broken, before he found something solid. The woman he thought he would spend the rest of his life with, even when the fire of their sex life simmered to embers after nearly a decade. He had known her body so well that sex was like coming home. Like saying I love you, even as the Empire closed around them. When life seemed bleak, he found hope and release in her arms. But then there had been an accident at work, and he came home early that day to find her in bed and not alone. Truthfully, he would have stayed. Tried to find a way to keep their love going and get past the hurt, but for her that was the end.

By then he was too tired to try again. Too angry. So he put all of that righteous fury into something he could fix. His factory had been taken over by Imperial forces, and, as a result, the work conditions and pay had gotten worse while the hours got longer. Injury got you fired and replaced, and there was no empathy for illness or weakness. No community. He put all of his passion into fighting for something better for the people around him, workers he oversaw. For it he'd been arrested for treason and crimes against the Empire.

That was how he found himself in his cell: a patchwork of heartache, loss, and laughter. Of every hand that had touched him and tongue that brought him pleasure. A patchwork of memories that he clung to as his hand reached into the pants of his uniform to find himself already hard with the anticipation of release. So he palmed himself, spread the moisture already gathering at the slit of his erection down his length, and let his memories give him a reprieve.

#kino loy #andor #andor fanfic #fanfiction #kino loy fanfiction #one shot #andy serkis #posting from ao3

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heaven-s-black-box · 6 months

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Never mine- Wakana/Sawamura ft. unrequited!MiyuSawa

Return to File

Recovery date: January 23rd, 2020

Description: Who would’ve guessed you’d be married in 48 hours?

Notes: A personal favorite entry.

Word count: 818

Back to directory

“So, how you feeling?” Miyuki asked, his usual smirk seemed forced.

“Great!” Sawamura yelled in his usual over the top way. “I can’t wait to be married to her!”

Miyuki smiled, not because he was happy that Sawamura was getting married, but because he was happy. Miyuki could care less about the wedding... okay, that was a lie. Miyuki hated the idea that Sawamura was marrying someone that wasn’t him. He wanted to scream, cry. But he wouldn’t, at least not in front of Sawamura, he wouldn’t ruin this for him. Kuramochi was the only one he told about how he really felt.

He still remembers showing up at Mochi’s in the middle of the night drunk. He had just gotten the wedding invite, and like any heart broken soul, he decided to drink his troubles away. He had spent the night crying about how stupid he was, and Mochi tried to convince him to confess. He kept saying, “There’s still time to tell him.”

That was months ago, now there was no time. Here he and Sawamura were, almost 48 until the wedding. They were at a baseball diamond, their safe place both alone and together. Sawamura had called him a few hours ago asking to play catch. It was late, or early, a little after midnight. Sawamura was trying to work out his pre wedding jitters.

“Wakana’s a lucky girl, but I feel a little bad. I mean, she has to spend the rest of her life with you,” he teased.

“Hey!” Sawamura yelled throwing the ball at Miyuki’s head.

Miyuki laughed, he loved Sawamura’s temper. It was one of the things from a long list of things he loved. He never thought he’d be pushed like this, confess or hold his peace. It would have been easy months ago, even years ago, back in highschool. But now… he couldn’t do that to him, he loved him, as long as Sawamura was happy he could make do. He thought…

“I can’t believe you. Sawamura Eijun. The obnoxious loud mouth pitcher. Is getting married in 48 hours.”

“Ya, it’s like a dream.” More like a nightmare, Miyuki thought.

---

“Well,” Miyuki started,” I for one, never thought we’d be here.” I hoped I’d be the one sitting at the newly wed table. “I still remember the cocky junior high kid who challenged one of my senpai’s. First day in the big city and already picking fights.” Everyone laughed, Miyuki felt his mouth go dry. “Wakana’s gonna have her hands full with him. Seriously, keep an eye on him or he’ll lose his own head. Haha,” he looked over at the newly weds, at Saw-Eijun (There were two Sawamura’s now). “Unfortunately, I can’t tell every story about Sawamura because we’d be here all day. Not even embarrassing stories narrows it down enough.” Again laughter, he took a sip of his beer and laughed when Saw-Eijun yelled at him. “Y’know he basically picked a fight with the coach on the first day. After showing up late, and he got caught trying to sneak in to the introduction line.” The coach was smiling and Wakana was patting her husband on the back.” Although getting caught may have been my fault, him being late was Kuramochi’s fault.” Mochi yelled at him and Ryousuke had to stop him from killing Miyuki. “But, that’s enough from me. Wakana,” he said looking over at them, “take care of my partner for me.” With that he stepped off the stage as everyone applauded.

---

Miyuki was able to stick around through the rest of the toasts, they were all stories he knew but they never got old. He almost made it through the first dance, although that was a close call. But, it was the cake cutting, watching them feed eachother, that broke him. He excused himself for fresh air, but he had no intent on returning. He didn’t want to be around when Eijun got back to his seat.

He had taken Kuramochi’s advice and decided to confess. He couldn’t do it in person, he didn’t want to face that heartbreak face on. So he wrote a love letter, and inclosed with it in the envelope was a button. Straight from the pages of one of Eijun’s manga, it was the second button of his blazer.

From outside the venue he could hear the laughter, music, and cheers. He’d played this out so many times, but it hurt actually going through with it. But there was no way he could go back, he could move the letter and definately could face Eijun if he read it. So, he hailed a cab and went home. Somewhere between getting home and going to bed, he blocked Eijun’s number. But before he did, he sent one last text:

To: Loud mouth pitcher Time 10:46 p.m I’m sorry… but I meant every word. Sent Loud mouth pitcher blocked

#Researcher S's recovery #ace of the diamond #daiya no ace #miyusawa #sawamura eijun #miyuki kazuya #sawamura x wakana #angst #oneshot #DNA oneshot

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teaandatale · 1 year

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One line, one fic

Rules: pick any 10 of your fics, scroll somewhere to the mid point, pick a line, and share it! Then tag 10 people.

Tagged by these lovelies: @thesokovianaccords & @doctorhelena! Thank you this was so fun to revisit old fics!

Under Suspicion (Peggy/Steve):

"Well Peg, you'll have to finish telling me about your princess saving adventures later," he says with a smirk. "Nice to meet you lads," he says, but before he can walk away he snaps his fingers. "Oh, before I forget," he reaches inside his jacket and pulls out a small parcel, "from mum. She's still outrageously concerned you're still not behaving like a proper lady."

I'm Your National Anthem (Peggy/Steve):

"I think I'm drunk," he whispers, his voice laced with regret, with near heartbreak. Like he just realized this is the end of the interlude.

Peggy's Pocket Problems (Peggy/Steve):

“So that’s Captain America, huh?” the nurse mused aloud. “He’s much more… gentlemanly than I expected in a guy with such a daunting look about him.”

A Glimpse, A Glimmer (Peggy/Steve):

Peggy hums, watching Sarah crawling between the mess of toys in front of them. “I’m fine, Steve,” she says. “Baby likes the sound of Daddy’s voice.”

Layer on Layer (Peggy/Steve):

She squeezed his hand and shook her head. “I’m not telling you this to make you feel bad or to prove that other people have it worse. I just… I want you to know that you’re not the only one who holds the weight of things lost. I was nowhere near involved and I still felt guilty over his death. Maybe if I’d been a better sister. Maybe if I’d joined up sooner,” she said with a sigh. “The what-ifs are hard to shrug off. The fact is, he’s no longer alive, but that doesn’t mean I’ve lost all of him. Even if it’s taken me years to come to terms with that.”

Special of the Day (Peggy/Steve):

“My grandma’s soda bread recipe,” he says, slicing her a generous wedge and setting a bit of butter on her plate. “Whenever I was sad or upset, she’d take me into the kitchen and we’d knead out dough. I’d watch it rise in the oven. Then, we’d sit and eat together, the bread still warm so the butter would melt and trickle down the sides. Something about it always made me feel a little better.” He taps the edge of her ceramic plate. “So take a deep breath and let the Irish soda bread work its magic.”

Bitters and Sugar (Peggy/Steve):

“Oh you’re on.” His eyes narrow as he focuses, leaning forward and making a show of lining up his shot. It makes Peggy giggle. Apparently he can hear it over the music because he pauses and looks up at her, his features relaxing into an easy smile. There’s something in the softness that makes her notice her heart patter at a quicker pace.

A Masterpiece of Us (Peggy/Steve):

She laughs. “Oh yes, please do go on Mr. Resident-Art-Expert.” Her voice is teasing but she means it. Passionate and fiery Steve is one of her most favorite of Steves. “What else strikes your wonder?”

Pas de deux (Peggy/Steve):

“Holy shit! This is incredible. The drama! The passion! I don’t know nothing, except that this is fantastic!” Angie turned back to Ms. Fry. “Centerpiece of the show, you said?” Steve and Peggy hadn’t heard that description before. “I can most definitely see that now.”

Old Flames and Eternal Ones (Chloe/Lucifer):

Lucifer went out to his car but paused to give Chloe a call but again, he found his pocket empty. He set out in search of the cellphone he tossed out the window hours ago but it was nowhere to be found. Infernal devices. Who would have expected the devil to find himself too dependent on a piece of human technology?

Tagging: anyone who hasn’t done this one yet!!

#tag game #my fic #makes me want to revisit a bunch of these worlds

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bmacreadz · 10 months

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"Once Upon a Broken Heart" by Stephanie Garber

"Once Upon a Broken Heart" is the first book in a trilogy that seems like it will definitely be worth the read (and the wait!).

This story follows Evangeline who, through heartbreaking circumstances, ends up making a deal with an infamous magic being who is rumored to be cunning and unpredictable. If you've read Garber's "Caraval" series, then you've already met Jacks.

In this story, Jacks is not what he appears to be, or what he appeared to be in the previous trilogy. He's definitely not an angel, but we are able to see him thaw a little towards Evangeline. And it is a thawing because there's not a whole lot of "romance" in this one.

I was a worried initially because I really wanted this book to give me something in the direction of romance. The title wasn't promising romance, and the description wasn't really giving me anything either (and for me to expect any different was absolutely on me). However, I'm very happy with the direction I see this story going. Granted, I am positive that I will have to read every book in this trilogy before finally having my breath taken away by that blessed feeling of falling in love, but from what I know of Garber, she always gives us something. I'm guessing we'll have enough to hold onto throughout each installment that we'll want to keep reading and rooting for Evangeline and Jacks.

What Garber didn't really give us so much was world-building. I, personally, didn't miss it too much because I was so focused on what was going on with Evangeline. It becomes pretty clear that Jacks isn't the only one hiding things from her and I don't anticipate her misfortune letting up any time soon. Regardless, it's hard for me to picture in my head the world that Garber set this story in. Evangeline travels somewhere north of where "Legendary" and "Finale" are set - where fairytales, myths, and legends hold some grain of truth. She is sent there by the newly-established Empress Scarlett Dragna to meet the crowned prince and serve as an ambassador on behalf of Valenda and the Meridian Empire. But I don't really know much about the actual place of The Magnificent North. Once again, from what I know of Garber, I'm certain she'll reveal even more to us as we continue reading the rest of the series.

The ending of "Once Upon a Broken Heart" definitely shocked me into a "I-can't-believe-she-just-ended-it-like-that!" state. Garber definitely wanted her readers to come back. So, I immediately bought the second book, "The Ballad of Never After" on my Kindle. And that review will be coming soon(-ish).

Sidenote #1: I read one review that stated something along the lines of "this book was just a setup for sequels." I have to agree, I think. It's pretty clear that this first installment is just a taste of what will come, but that's definitely not a deterrent for me. I want the subsequent books to be better and tell me more and make me feel all the things. To each their own, of course, but I wasn't entirely put-off by the idea that this book was just an introduction. In fact, thinking of it like that only makes me more excited for part two!

Sidenote #2: I haven't been posting as much because I haven't been reading as much. Last year, I think I read so many good books that I set myself up for failure because it's been so hard for me to keep interest in some of the stories I've been trying to read. I have some on my TBR list that I was waiting to buy in paperback, but will probably just get on my Kindle so I can go ahead and read try them out. That being said, book recommendations are appreciated. :)

#book review #stephanie garber #once upon a broken heart

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multi-lefaiye · 1 year

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Too many but

🗣 Share your favorite dialogue exchange.

🏝 Share your favorite description of a setting.

💔 Share your most heartbreaking line.

📝 Share the first line of your project.

😂 Share your funniest line (or dialogue exchange).

🤯 Share a surprising line, or one where a character realizes something.

👤 Share a line that shows a character’s personality.

🫂 Share a line (or dialogue exchange) that shows the relationship between two characters.

not too many at all! thank you! :D

gonna put my answers under the cut since this is a bit long!

🗣 Share your favorite dialogue exchange.

“I don’t have your resumé on hand right now, but why don’t we do an interview right here? God, fuck, I hate thinking of questions on the spot--okay, what kind of experience do you have?” “I worked at Publix for a few months when I was 16?” “Okay, yeah, that works perfectly. You might actually be a bit over-qualified. Okay, can you tell me about yours- MOTHERFUCKSHITGODDAMMIT.” "Shit, I'm sorry!" "I'm fine, I'm fine. You know what? Fuck this, actually. You're hired."

this is once again from a tftgs thing <3 whoops-

🏝 Share your favorite description of a setting.

Calling the gas station’s break room a break room was truthfully a bit of a misnomer. Really, it was a glorified closet, but the owners had made it clear on multiple occasions that they weren’t interested in shilling out for an actual break room, so it was all they had. So, the employees of the gas station made do, and over time they’d managed to really make the closet feel homey. There was no table, but they’d managed to get their hands on some folding chairs and set them up in a small circle, and a couple of boxes in the back served as rudimentary storage for anything people wanted to keep there. At some point, one of Jack’s coworkers (probably Jerry) had even taken the initiative to hang a little cat poster up on one wall, and someone else (probably Rosa) had hung some Christmas lights to liven up the place.

i swear i do write things that aren't tftgs, please believe me-

💔 Share your most heartbreaking line.

This was far from the first time that someone had looked at Jack and decided he’d failed to meet some standard they’d had for him in their mind, and it wouldn’t be the last.

okay i think that's the last tftgs one i'll share at least for this ask ASDFJK;L i need to prove i write other things.

📝 Share the first line of your project.

this is one of my favorite lines i've written tbh, even if i need to rework the wip it's for.

It’s the dead of night when the monster climbs out of their shallow grave.

😂 Share your funniest line (or dialogue exchange).

Henry then heard a groan and looked to see, in the center of the various objects Addison had spread around the circle of chalk sigils, there was a completely nude man unconscious on the floor of his apartment. The man was handsome in a rugged sort of way, with long, sandy-brown hair and a body riddled with various scars. For a moment, Henry just stared at him. Then he asked the question that was nagging at the back of his mind. “Why the fuck is he naked?”

hehe <3

🤯 Share a surprising line, or one where a character realizes something.

i've shared this bit before, but a bit from fragile things:

Putting a word to it was a relief. He finally knew what was wrong--he just wasn’t a girl like he’d been raised to be! However, this opened the door to a whole new world of possibilities and unknowns, and those frightened him deeply. Giving his problem a name made it real, not something he could shove under the rug and ignore. He was a boy. He was a boy, and that was fucking terrifying.

👤 Share a line that shows a character’s personality.

For the past hour, Roach had been playfully arguing with Yara about something technical that Oliver didn’t quite understand, something specific relating to the editing software they’d started using recently. Syd chimed in now and then, but for the most part, they stayed out of it, occasionally sharing bemused glances with Oliver. He smiled back at them each time, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off Roach for long. Even with his lack of understanding of the subject matter, something about Roach when they were this passionate was captivating. Their grin was wide, and they gestured with their long-fingered hands as if to emphasize each loud, delighted word.

this is from oliver's perspective, but i think it's a good show of roach's personality <3

🫂 Share a line (or dialogue exchange) that shows the relationship between two characters.

Finally, the monster speaks. “Who… are… you…?” The monster’s throat burns with every word as though they’ve eaten glass, each syllable a bloody smear against their chapped lips. The man chuckles. “I am The Raven.” The words mean nothing to the monster, but they can tell the title means something to him. “And I am your savior.” For a long moment, the monster simply stares at him, analyzing him. Eventually, they ask the only question they can think of. “Who… am… I…?” “Who you are doesn’t matter,” The Raven tells them, voice condescending as though he is speaking to a child. “What matters is what you will become.” The monster blinks a few times, uncomprehending. “Be… come?” The Raven does not elaborate.

yeah <3

#talk to the bunnykitty #ask game #will!!#tftgs posting #a modern ghost story #fragile things wip #the supernatural polycule #wait augh this last one doesn't have a tag does it #uhhhhhhhh hm here we go #dead chess wip #idk that works #multi's writing

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i-am-darth-feanor · 2 years

Text

Sword and Arrow: Prologue

Fandom: The Lord of the Rings

Pairings: Aragorn/Female OC, Aragorn/Boromir

Chapter warnings: some slightly graphic violence.

Fic summary/blurb thing: 🏹⚔️ 👑𝐑𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫. 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐫. 𝙆𝙞𝙣𝙜.👑⚔️ 🏹The Rangers of the North are known far and wide for their skills in battle and secrecy. Of this taciturn group of Dúnedain, two are especially renowned for their deeds in battle: Aragorn, the Lord of the Dúnedain and Commandant of Rangers, and Beruthiel, his second-in-command.When Aragorn receives a dire summons from Rivendell but is wandering the Wild on some business of his, Beruthiel rides with haste from Fornost to find him. Once they reach Rivendell, she is invited to the secretive Council of Elrond and, unwilling to leave her friend's side, she joins the group known as the Fellowship of the Ring.From there, Beruthiel is thrown onto a thrilling ride of adventure, love, death, and heartbreak as she meets - and loses - people who she would fight with sword and arrow for. [somewhat inspired by Ranger’s Apprentice]

~👑🗡️🏹~

PROLOGUE

The young Ranger was surrounded. He was backed against a tree, facing as many as fifty orcs. His sword was drawn, not that it would do much good. Great. Just great. He was traveling north for the first time, to meet the rest of the Dunedain. And now I'm being attacked barely five leagues from Fornost. He nervously shifted his footing. This was the first actual fight he'd been in, Elladan and Elrohir had always told him to stay behind. Do most people die in their first fight? he wondered. Then: Do most people get attacked right after being told that they come from an ancient royal line?

The orcs surrounding him snarled. He lifted his sword higher. No need to tell them how scared he was. Then they came at him. He frantically swung his sword. One, two, three. That's good. Except for the fact that there's about forty more. He took down another one, nearly giving a second an opening. I'm going to die, aren't I? I should've taken this damned quiver off first.

Something rustled in the surrounding trees as he was locked hilt-to-hilt with an orc. Great, there's more of them. Then a figure burst out of the undergrowth. He wielded two knives, a long and a short, like the Ranger wore on his belt and proceeded the wreak havoc on the orcs. Emboldened by the stranger, the young Ranger began fighting harder. Even as they fought side-by-side, he couldn't see the newcomer's face under his hood.

"Get behind me!" he called. The Ranger obeyed, standing back-to-back with the stranger with ten orcs surrounding them. When all ten of them rushed at the two, they were cut to pieces. The newcomer let out a breath, then lowered his knives. The Ranger, however, warily kept his up as the newcomer pushed his hood back, revealing a feminine face that wasn't too much younger than the Ranger's twenty-three years, with the same dark hair and grey eyes that he had. A feminine face?! the Ranger thought with surprise.

"Who-who are you?" the Ranger asked defiantly, holding his sword by his shoulders. The woman smiled.

"My name's Beruthiel," she said. "But most people just call me Wildcat. We were expecting you earlier, my lord. They sent me to look for you when you didn't arrive. Good thing I came, too." She poked an orc with the point of the longer of the knives she carried. Its head fell off.

"Do... we know each other?" the Ranger asked carefully.

"No." With that, the woman- Beruthiel, that was her name -walked off, and the Ranger followed her. Why am I following a girl younger than me that I found in the middle of the wilds? "But I know who you are, my lord. You are Aragorn, son of Arathorn, aren't you?" She turned around, looking at him expectantly.

"Yes," he said, drawing the word out and hurrying after her as she kept walking. "But why are you searching for me?"

"Lord Elrond sent word by messenger bird that you were coming north," she explained. "We were to let any man of your description into Arnor. We expected you five days ago, but when you didn't come, Halbarad sent out people to search."

"Wha- what?" he asked, wishing she would slow down. "Who's Halbarad?"

She closed her eyes for a second. Right, he's never met the Dunedain before. "He's your cousin," she finally said. "The chieftain in your absence." Beruthiel began pulling aside shrubs.

"What are you doing?" Aragorn asked her, finally gathering the courage to ask about her odd behavior. This seemed like a woman he did not want to cross. She ignored him, pulling aside a large tree branch and revealing a grey horse.

"Aha!" She led the horse out of the thicket and pulled herself into the saddle. "Mount up," she said, gesturing behind her. Aragorn finally sheathed the sword he was holding up and climbed up. His instincts told him to trust the woman. "Ready?" Without waiting for an answer, she snapped the reins, sending Aragorn flying back. He would've fallen off if he hadn't grabbed her shoulder. As twigs tore at his messier-than-usual hair, he could've sworn he heard her laughing.

~👑🗡️🏹~

Sword and Arrow Masterpost

#sword and arrow #darth feanor's writing #lotr #lotr fanfiction #fanfiction #aragorn #aragorn x boromir #aragorn x oc #boromir #legolas

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