#everyone was too hard on chaol

[achaotichuman]

This is my first and last TOG post ever.

Anyone who says Chaol was in the wrong for not accepting or trusting Aelin after she was revealed to be Fae is someone I do not trust in the slightest.

My baby can do no wrong.

#aelin cannot go and scar him for life #blame him for a death he literally had no part in causing #get mad that he didn't like fae #and get mad that he still trusted dorian even though he had magic in his veins #as if he hadn't known dorian for the better part of his entire life #and known aelin for what #two years #two and a half?? #its been three years since I read the series #everyone was too hard on chaol #who was literally just vibing with his life #and had it all uphauled by aelin #and an evil monarchy #none of it was his fault #pro chaol westfall #pro chaol #throne of glass #AELIN THREATENED TO KILL DORIAN FOR GODS SAKE OF COURSE CHAOL IS GONNA BE LIKE 'AND YOU WANT ME TO FUCKIN TRUST YOU????'

[nightcourtreader]

Day by day I’m solidified in my belief that Azriel’s & Gwyn’s book is next rather than it being Elain and Lucien’s. I just think in my opinion it makes more sense that elucien will be last. Though I could still be wrong. 🤷🏽‍♀️ I would like to to be known this is long and everything stated are MY opinions.

SJM said it’s obvious who the next book is about after the readers read acosf. Azriel was a prominent figure in acosf. Way more than Elain was and that was shocking to me. Based off how nesta & Elain’s relationship was in the earlier books.

Yes Elain did get character development a little bit in acosf but she still wasn’t a prominent figure, she was once again pushed to the background. And I get that because it was nesta’s story but we still got so much more of feysand, Azriel, emrie, Gwyn, and even eris over Elain.

In a recent interview, I think it was the one last year. A girl asked SJM about having Elain and Azriel’s book being next, I forgot the form of the question. But I just remember SJM saying that “we will get Elain in some form.” That doesn’t sound like the next MC to me. And she didn’t even mention nothing about Azriel at all. SJM is known not to say too much about her books and spoil them. The way she was answering questions in this recent interview in September, she doesn’t like to spoil anything. So for her to say you will get Elain in some form and not say you will get Elain AND Azriel in some form and she just didn’t mention Azriel at all makes me just believe that it’s Azriel that’s going to be next and they’re def not getting a book together.

Ive seen so many people say “why would SJM give Azriel a book over Elain. She wouldn’t do that.” But how would we know that? Chaol got a book in the middle of the TOG series over everyone other characters, why can’t Azriel? It’s already a proven fact that the series is not just about the Archeon sisters since SJM has 2 more books planned about a couple coming together and there’s only 1 Archeon sister left. No matter how hard people try to argue with that fact. She mentioned how Azriel’s story is something she’s excited about writing and not just about his bed habits. So why is it far fetched he will get a book next? I also like the idea of having the series start with an Archeon sister and ending with one.

Then the bonus chapters. Azriel got one. He’s also a part of a second one for hofas. I saw an argument that well Cassian got a bonus chapter for acomaf and he didn’t get a book until acosf (or part of one). I think SJM did it like that because she wasn’t done with feysand’s story. It wouldn’t make sense to give Cassian/nesta a book when she wasn’t done writing feysand’s story in my opinion. Plus the first 3 books with Feyre pov was already planned before having a sisters book spin off.

I also think acofas was a perfect book to connect the series to Cassian’s pov & nesta’s pov to get the readers away from feysand’s pov. And her bonus chapter for Azriel is also a good example of that too. She wouldn’t put so much emphasis on Azriel’s bonus chapter for no reason in her interviews. Now that feysand’s & nessians story has been told, it makes more sense to have the next mc have a bonus chapter so we can get inside of the next MC’s head like we did with Cassian & nesta.

And I do get the fact that there are so many plot points that are unresolved in acowar, especially with koschei, but to me koschei is a last book level threat like how Maeve and erawan were in TOG. The two caused problems throughout the series but they weren’t defeated until the very last book of the series. That’s a pattern of SJM. In acowar (feysand’s last full novel) hybern was defeated. I already mentioned TOG. In Crescent city 3, I think she’ll have Bryce and Hunt defeat the asteri and hofas is the last book for Bryce & hunt’s story. To me that makes sense plot wise. Elain and Lucien are the only ones connected to koschei from the main characters that’s left.

Plus koschei was using braillyn to do his dirty work for him because he can’t leave his lake. I’m pretty sure he has tricks up his sleeve because I secretly think he and Merrill are working together since he whispers on the wind and she can listen to whispers on the wind (and that connects her to Gwyn. Especially since Merrill is suppose to be clotho’s right hand & Clotho appeared at the end of Azriel bonus chapter) But koschei’s back to square 1. I don’t think he poses a great risk at the moment. He needs to regroup and do another plan.

I know everybody wants the spring court to be back up and running and it needs to be back up and running before the next major war happens. SJM has brought it up too much for it not to happen and for it not to be important. But to me spring isn’t really the pressing matter, the autumn court is because of Beron trying to align with koschei like an idiot.

After the night court, the autumn court was the second most talked about court in acosf, then spring was the third. I understand that we have plots from acowar but we also can’t forget to acknowledge the plots that happen in acosf. We also got to see more of eris. I know Lucien has ties to the autumn court but he literally doesn’t fuck with anyone in the autumn court besides his mom and I don’t think he even sees her at all. Lucien calls eris a snake so Lucien isn’t on good terms with them so I really don’t connect him to autumn as much.

And until Beron is out the door, which I’m hoping that happens next book and we get eris as high lord, the autumn court is not going to be in good hands. And I really think Gwyn has autumn court ties to explore 👀. I’m a firm believer she has no spring court ties what so ever and she’s just connected to autumn.

And SJM tends to have her characters hit rock bottom in the acotar series or like them having an emotional conflict. When nesta had her book, since she was the prominent figure in acosf, it’s obvious that she hit rock bottom before acosf came out. She isolated herself. She drunk all the time and slept with men to keep her powers at bay. I don’t think we’ve really seen Elain hit rock bottom yet or have a prominent emotional conflict. Like it’s obvious Elain is suffering in silence just like her sister were, Im 100% certain Elain isn’t 100% happy, but to me shes a lot more chipper than her sisters were at the start of her journey from what we’ve seen.

At the end of acowar she was like happy and was like the world is going to need more gardens and she was looking bright for the future, and I didn’t expect that since what all happen in acowar. She’s snapping back at her sisters in acosf. Trying to advocate for herself as well. With Feyre we see in the beginning of acomaf she was depressed, not eating well, not really regulating her emotions well. We see how nesta was, I know Elain already went through that phase in acowar. But I’m just not 100% convinced that Elain is ready for her own journey just yet.

Now we see with Azriel, he’s just all over the place. To me he’s definitely having emotional conflict when it comes to the mating bond. Trying to ignore the whole thing about Mor knowing that needs to be addressed. Questioning if the cauldron got it wrong. The whole thing with Elain. Him wanting a mating bond. To me Azriel has hit rock bottom emotionally as well. A little different from both nesta and Feyre but to me all the same. Especially seeing now how his bothers has a known mating bond besides him. Romantically, since acotar is more romantically driven than plot driven it makes sense for him to be next. Especially with the plot with the Illyrians, which I think has been a long time coming as well.

Then just imagine Elain seeing that? Everybody else with their mating bonds & happy. How would that make her feel, I think it would make her hit rock botton and have that emotional conflict especially with the whole choice thing and her being stubborn, but we still don’t know because we haven’t gotten her pov but guess whose pov we do have and know who’s struggling? Azriel.

And no I don’t get the argument that Elain hasn’t gotten a bonus chapter because her visions will spoil it. Doesn’t make sense to me because SJM can write it without Elain having visions in the middle of it but still get her insight. Elain also said she needed time to ge reacquainted with her powers in acosf, so it’s not 100% certain she’s still getting visions anyway. No one can confirm or deny because we haven’t seen Elain really and no one has been around her enough to notice since everyone’s focus was on feysand & nessian.

I personally don’t think there’s a valid excuse as to why SJM didn’t give Elain a bonus chapter over Azriel. If people would question why would SJM give Azriel a book over Elain we need to question why she gave him a bonus chapter over Elain.

#gwynriel #acosf #elucien #elain archeron #gwyneth berdara #azriel bonus chapter #azriel shadowsinger #pro gwynriel

[elentiyawhitethorn]

Older but Never Wiser

CW: a bit of language

AN: Happy (almost belated) birthday @leiawritesstories my love!! This took way longer than it should have but depending on your time zone this might not be late yet lol, I’m dusting off the cobwebs to give you a little present :)

Based on this prompt: “you’re at the high school reunion and everyone’s talking about how you and [insert jerk here] were prom queen and king, unaware you dumped them years ago, and you’re moping… until you run into your nemesis from high school and you’re thoroughly distracted” (I can’t remember where this came from, it was just in my prompts folder, maybe I came up with it? Maybe not? Idk)

1458 words

Aelin could feel her shoulders begin to hunch as she drew in on herself. She’d known Chaol would be here, of course, but she hadn’t known the subject of prom queen and king would come up so soon, nor their joint senior superlative of “most likely to get married.”

She also hadn’t known Chaol would show up with a gorgeous woman taller than her, hotter than her, certainly classier than her, and wearing a giant diamond on her finger.

“I really thought you two were going to last,” Essar said, voice dripping with pity and sorrow as if she’d truly been invested in the relationship of two high school classmates she’d hardly ever interacted with ten years ago, let alone following graduation.

Aelin smiled tightly. “Well, it was for the best. I’m much happier now with my new boyfriend.” A lie, and an obvious one at that, if Essar bothered to notice. As it was, she was clearly more interested in the piece of gossip than its verity, even a decade after high school.

Some things really didn’t change.

The subject of Chaol was a bitter one—they had lasted several years following high school, and while Aelin had had plenty of time to move on, and multiple relationships following Chaol, seeing him now brought up old insecurities. Being interrogated about the end of their relationship by some random classmate at a high school reunion wasn’t making matters better.

“If you’ll excuse me,” Aelin cut in, “I should make some more rounds. It was nice to catch up with you.” There wasn’t an ounce of sincerity in Aelin’s tone and she couldn’t quite bring herself to care.

She and Essar exchanged goodbyes and Aelin fled, hurrying over to her friend Elide. Elide had been the class valedictorian and was now head of some tech company in Rifthold.

After catching up with her and a few others, Aelin headed for the refreshment table. She wasn’t one for social events, and after the tedious process of listening to the reunion’s organizers give speeches, followed by a solid half hour of unstructured mingling, Aelin was drained.

She poured herself a cup of punch. Staring into the reddish liquid at a distorted reflection of herself, Aelin sighed.

“I can’t believe Aelin Galathynius, socialite, gossip, prom queen extraordinaire, is moping at the snack table at a social event. Hell really has frozen over.”

Aelin started at the voice, looking up to see a man with stark white hair towering over her. He had certainly changed over the past decade, but the sharp pine green eyes clued her in on his identity instantly.

“Rowan Whitethorn,” Aelin drawled, grinning. “You…” She looked him over, taking in the size of his crossed arms, the deep tan, and the hard features. A tattoo snaked up his neck from somewhere underneath his shirt. Aelin whistled. “Time has served you well.”

Rowan chuckled, the sound all too familiar. “You think so?” He paused, and gave her a once-over of his own. “I could say the same.”

Aelin leaned against the table, smiling. “Do tell me what it is you do for a living. Wait—let me guess. Sly business man. Lawyer? Oh, tax collector!”

Another, louder laugh left Rowan’s lips. “I’m a child psychologist.”

Aelin’s jaw dropped. “Damn, okay.”

He grinned. “You’re what, a fashion designer? A housewife?”

Aelin rolled her eyes. “I work at a pharmacy.”

Rowan shook his head in disbelief, smiling widely. Silence settled over the pair, but it wasn’t an uncomfortable pause—merely a moment to take in each other after so long. Aelin remembered arguing with the boy this man had once been over schoolwork, over sports, over absolutely nothing.

“Gods, tell me you’re not with that asshole anymore,” Rowan said, breaking the quiet.

Aelin blinked, then felt her lips unconsciously stretch into a another smile. “No, I’m not.”

Rowan hmmed noncommittalaly. “You two were never a good match.”

He was the first person who hadn’t offered her condolences like it was some kind of recent tragedy, and for that Aelin felt her smile turn soft. “Remind me why we hated each other again?”

A breathy laugh. “I believe that was thanks to the time you scraped up the side of my car trying to park on the very first day of junior year.”

“We were sixteen! No one could drive well at that age.” Aelin was grinning.

Rowan crossed his arms. “Or perhaps the time you literally tased me? With a fucking taser?”

Aelin let out a startled laugh. She’d completely forgotten about that. One of the football boys had hosted a party while his parents were out of town, and his mom was a cop so he brought out her taser for a game of whoever can hold onto this $20 while being tased in the hand gets to keep it. Gods, high school had been quite the experience.

“That was part of the game! You took the risk, and you lost; I can’t be blamed for that. Besides, I happen to remember you making out with my boyfriend on one occasion.”

Rowan groaned in faux embarrassment, a hand running though his short locks. “Lorcan dared us to. Besides, you’d already broken up with Dorian at that point, so it didn’t really count.”

Aelin’s face started to ache as she realized just how widely her smile was stretched. “That definitely still counts, but fine, let me think of some other instance you were an asshole to me. I’m sure there were plenty.”

Rowan shook his head, eyes dancing with mirth, and opened his mouth to make a retort—but someone else beat him to it.

“Aelin! I was so happy to spot you here. How have you been?”

Of course, it was Chaol, leering over at her in a suit far too sophisticated for the occasion.

Aelin felt a wave of calm wash over her as she realized that as much as she didn’t want to have a civil conversation with Chaol, she wanted him to have the upper hand even less.

“Chaol, my gods! I’ve been great; I take it you have been as well judging by the beautiful woman on your arm?”

The woman in question blushed, and Aelin wondered what exactly she knew about her.

Chaol grinned and held up the woman’s hand—and the ring perched on her fourth finger—like some kind of prize. “This is Yrene, my fiancée. Yrene, meet Aelin and… Ronan?”

“Rowan,” Rowan correctly coolly, then glanced at Yrene. “It’s a pleasure.”

Chaol nodded dismissively and turned back to Aelin. “Is that a new haircut?”

It had been a solid six years since she’d dated the man, and at least three since they’d crossed paths. “Yes, it is.”

“And how are you getting on with that Fenrys fellow? Still happy?”

The last time Aelin had seen Chaol had been at the grocery story—fucking small towns—with her boyfriend at the time. He hadn’t lasted more than a month.

“No.”

A flicker of glee crossed Chaol’s features, and Aelin writhed internally.

“Much to my benefit, that is,” Rowan interjected. Aelin had nearly forgotten he was still standing with them. “For now I have her all to myself.”

What?

Chaol blinked, dumbfounded. “You two are together?”

Rowan shrugged. “We reconnected a couple years ago and hit it off—better than we ever had in high school,” he added.

Aelin had just enough self-control to paste a smile on her lips. Now understanding what Rowan was doing for, she took his hand casually.

Rowan’s hand envoloped Aelin’s, and his rough calluses scraped against her palm. It took restraint not to shudder, and Chaol be damned, Aelin was no longer paying attention to the conversation. Her world focused in on the warm hand interlaced with her own.

Less interested, probably now that he’d realized he didn’t have much to hang over her head, Chaol said a farewell and retreated with the fiancée who hadn’t spoken a single word. Aelin watched them leave gratefully.

Rowan slipped his hand out of Aelin’s and she almost objected before realizing herself.

“Thank you, Rowan,” Aelin said softly.

Her gaze drifted over to him and snagged on his piercing green eyes.

Rowan stared back at her for a moment. “No problem.”

Aelin shook her head. “It wasn’t no problem. That was very kind of you.”

Rowan shook his head, but said nothing more about the endeavor. “How long are you in town?”

“A whole week. I wanted to stay with my parents for a bit.”

“And I don’t suppose while you’re here you want to grab coffee together? I still need an example of the atrocities you claim I put you through, after all.”

Aelin’s expression turned fiendish. “Does tomorrow work?”

———

Tag List (this is so outdated so lmk if you want to be removed/added!):

@aelin-bitch-queen

@autumnbabylon

@charlizeed

@evolving-dreamer

@feysand-loml

@flora-shadowshine

@gracie-rosee

@infernoqueen19

@julemmaes

@leiawritesstories

@lemonade-coolattas

@live-the-fangirl-life

@midsizewitch

@morganofthewildfire

@mybloodrunsblue

@nehemikkele

@realbookloverproblems

@rhysandswingspan

@rowaelinismyotp

@rowanaelinn

@sexy-dumpster-fire

@sleeping-and-books

@story-scribbler

@swankii-art-teacher

@thegreyj

@the-lonelybarricade

@thenerdandfandoms

@yesdreamblog

#rowaelin #tog #older but never wiser #my writing

[sofiasjornal]

Kingdom of Ash Review (a little late)

I really didn't know what to write about this one, or even how to say goodbye, so I won't!

Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The first 250 pages were absolute hell. Not because they weren't well written, they really were, and that was why they were so difficult to get through. What Maeve and Cairn did to Aelin... I suffered with her through every single line of those chapters. And when she rescued herself (because let's face it, she did it, Rowan and the others were just there to help her) I didn't feel as much relief as I thought, I felt really tired. And when she said she too was tired, my heart broke alongside hers.

Everyone who told me Chaol got better in KoA was absolutely right! He grew a lot, but I suppose war does that... and Yrene. We all need to bow down to Yrene.

Gavriel's death broke my heart in tiny little pieces. I really thought he and Aedion would have the time to talk properly, to get to know each other... but they didn´t... But in the end, Gavriel died protecting his won, just like a father would.

I loved how all of the couples got to in the end. It was a fitting end for everyone. The only thing that bothered me a little was how Dorian and Manon's storyline was left open ended. With two impredictable characters as those two, I just don't know. Somehow I dont see Manon marrying Dorian and becoming the Queen of Adarlan, not after so much pain to get the witches together. Maybe they'll be happy with the back and forward... I guess is up to us to imagine how those two would end up in the end.

But Aelin... Aelin went home and got everything she deserved. Every moment of peace she fought so hard and sacrificed so much for... And now she's rebuilding a world, a better world. Just like she promised.

I realised that I will never be able to say goodbye to Aelin. I think about her constantly, about her strength, her endurance, her passion. I loved her from that first moment and I would've followed her to hell, and we did. But even now, that Throne of Glass is officially over, I do not say goodbye. I keep her here. Always

Aelin

#books #sarah j maas #throne of glass #tog #bookblr #book review #kingdom of ash #aelin #aelin fireheart #queen aelin #aelin throne of glass #aelin ashryver galathynius #aelin galathynius

[acourtofthought]

Do you not see a future Azriel-centric book? She did it with Chaol after all. For sure, she will have one for Elain (and Lucien hopefully!) and how I wish it’d be the next one! But with all the Azriel content we’ve been getting, my knee jerk reaction was yes, Azriel’s story will be next and esp because Elain has been MIA lately. So I thought there’s a high chance it’s gonna be Az’s story. Either way, I’m excited to get more ACOTAR content and I’m excited to see Elucien and even Gwynriel! My faith is so strong in those two ships happening (esp with your blog!) that I’m super excited. A part of me a little thrilled to see all the naysayers proven wrong 😅 and a little frightened at all the drama that’s gonna come from e/riels.

To add, two people I know have just both finished the original ACOTAR and in the middle of the hours worth of audio messages, not once did they bring up Az and Elain, not until I mentioned it. Neither of them are big readers, they’ve just started reading again. They are far detached from the book community so they are, in a way, unbiased in that sense and totally just going off on what they’ve read and as they read it, they both saw a future with Elucien. Just an interesting thought lol.

One last question, thoughts on Rhys in HOFAS? A lot of Nesta stans are on his case but if you ask me, he acted as any smart, commanding ruler would. Did everyone just forget that rhysand is the high lord and Nesta one of his people? Did everyone just forget that ultimately she answers to him in matters of the court and safety? Besides when has Rhys the High Lord ever been gentle and soft hearted? He is not a straight laced morally good easy guy, he’s ruthless, fierce and iron fisted. You saw how he dealt with Az. It’s part of who he is and leaning into that side of him heavily is what he’s built his whole reputation on! Rhysand the Mate of Feyre is a different story (provided a gateway to his inner truths deep down) and I would hope it is! Plus, what Nesta did was very reckless and dangerous if you ask me. I’m on Rhys side if you can’t tell 😂

Alright that’s it, you’re awesome! xx

I do think that Chaol's book is proof that SJM can and has written the MMC's journey being the thing to kick start the book, eventually leading to his female love interest becoming her own force of nature. So when some say that Az can't get his own book because SJM writes about the females coming into their own they're ignoring that she can still accomplish that goal even without the female being the catalyst for the story to begin.

However.....right now I don't see Az set up in the same way Chaol was.

Chaol story began because he lost the use of his legs and was sailing to the Torre Cesme to see if he could be healed. Az is not currently dealing with anything remotely close to that. As of the crossover he still remains the broody, somewhat arrogant, spymaster of the IC as he was in every book before. Yes, Bryce bested him but she bested Nesta at times too. When Bryce returned, there seemed to be no hard feelings between them. And yes, there's some mystery surrounding Az's backstory and the fact that he has TT but again, that's not any different from Lucien not knowing his true heritage.

Chaol was also traveling to the Torre Cesme to find allies for the war.

HOFAS ended and there was nothing to indicate that Bryce's arrival left Az in a position to have any sort of influence on Spring, Koschei, Beron, the peace treaty.

Chaol's purpose, the reason he was taking the journey he was, was clearly explained to us prior to TOD and I'm not getting that from Az's current setup. SJM gave him page time in SF as he was Cassian's best friend and she included him in the crossover because I think it will set him up for later books, but in relation to the actual concerns in SF and the things they remained worried about by the end of that book, I still have no idea how Az would tie into Spring, Koschei, Beron, the peace treaty in a way that would advance the plot forward and I don't think HOFAS left us with any additional information.

Everything the crossover dealt with, the information they discovered, it all involved the NC and the Prison lands and that all ties into the IC, the Illyrians and the Valkryie.

Beron wants Spring lands - not the NC.

Koschei wants to free himself from the lake to rule their entire world - not just the NC.

The fae on the continent want the human lands - not NC territory.

That all ties into Elain, Vassa, and Lucien.

As far as Elain's absence in SF and the crossover, her journey was set up pretty early on (ACOMAF / ACOWAR / ACOFAS / a bit in ACOSF). Same with Lucien. But despite that neither Elain and Lucien were the main focus of SF and absent from the crossover, Chaol was completely absent in EOS.

So while Chaol is proof that a MMC can lead a book, I think his setup is actually more in line with Elucien's and them getting a book next is still what makes the most sense to me, with SJM further delving into the Illyrians / Valkryie / Time Travel at a later point, where she can expand on that beyond a single book and further connect the NC characters to future crossover storylines.

I have a few friends like yours, ones who are casual readers and E/riel is not on their radar, haha. To them, the question is "what are Elain and Lucien going to do about their bond?" over "will Elain end up with Az?" The Elucien bond is where the tension, excitement and drama lie, not in the lukewarm temperature of E/riel interactions.

I agree with you on the Nesta / Rhys situation. It's not that we don't recognize that Nesta was trying to help someone feel not so powerless as she often did but she did risk the safety of their world. Bryce tricked she and Az in the cave yet she still not only decided to trust Bryce enough with the mask after that but she also gambled that the Asteri wouldn't get a hold of it and find their way back to the world of Prythian, risking the lives of everyone they loved.

It was reckless and Rhys's concern is for his people, his mate and his son. And as a new parent, you become ferocious over your children's safety so I can understand why he lost his temper and why he felt Nesta put Bryce's needs over that of everyone else's.

It was both selfless and selfish.

Thank you for your message, I hope you have a wonderful morning / day / night!

#elucien #pro elucien #anti e/riel #lucien vanserra #elain archeron #hofas spoilers

[witchthewriter]

𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝒇��𝒓 @lovelyartemisa.

𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐆𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐒

𝑫𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒊𝒑𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏

𝐼 𝑠𝘩𝑖𝑝 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑖𝑡𝘩 𝐶𝘩𝑎𝑜𝑙 𝑊𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑓𝑎𝑙𝑙! Stoic, loyal, dutiful. His eyes would be for you and only you. His eyes would never wander. And his love wouldn't waver. He will always be there for you, defend you, protect you and give his life for yours.

𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒐𝒏𝒔

Chaol smells of Cedarwood, Vanilla, and Amber. He bathes everyday in those oils, sometimes you join him ... sometimes he wakes up too early for you to join him (he's a morning person)

Loves when you fall asleep on him. Especially his chest, or shoulder or lap. Where he can hold you close. You like to listen to his steady heartbeat.

You had been pining over Chaol for a very long time. And he had no idea. Everyone else knew. But not him. He was completely oblivious, because why would someone as beautiful as you want him?

It wasn't until Aelin actually pointed it out that Chaol finally found out. She didn't tell him while you were there, to spare your embarrassment (she's a good friend of yours) and Chaol was stunned.

You like to run up behind him and tackle him to the bed. He likes a lot of physical touch and play. No one would think it, but he does.

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈

Dance Me To The End Of Love by the Midnite String Quartet

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔

Madly In Love x Ridiculously Oblivious

It's Always Been You

Similar Personalities

𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆

You Fell First, But They Fall Harder

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒊𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒗𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖

That you're hardworking, dedicated and passionate. When you have your mind set on something, you won't let anything stop you from doing it. You're driven and stubborn and reliable.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅

𝐼𝑠 𝑁𝑒𝑠𝑟𝑦𝑛! I think you have this innate quietness that means you keep a lot to yourself. You aren't an open book, unless you're around people you like. You opened up to Nesryn easily and quickly - she had this stable, earth-like aura about her. Stable, grounded, and loyal, almost like a female Chaol (but more adventurous and cultured). You two are very, very close.

𝑾𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆

A mix between Nesryn, Yrene and Elide. You have a lot of potential inside you, a power, a hidden confidence that only some people see. You also have the sassiness and ability to give a witty quip when needed.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒑𝒆𝒕

A Wyvern, even though you're not a witch. A clutch of eggs were found in the Ferrian Gap, and the Ruk riders brought them back to Antica. As a surprise, Nesryn brought one back as a present for you. Chaol was absolutely ... worried about it. There was so much potential danger with this wyvern, but you wanted it so bad.

It hatched and grew quickly. A bit sickly at first, he was very small. But you helped him eat and drink, and even you helped him learn to fly!

𝐆𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄

𝑫𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒊𝒑𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏

𝐼 𝑠𝘩𝑖𝑝 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑖𝑡𝘩 𝑀𝑎𝑡𝑡𝘩𝑖𝑎𝑠 𝐻𝑒𝑙𝑣𝑎𝑟! I think you two would work so well! It's like you two would balance each other out. He doesn't like fighting/confrontations either, but will get into it if it's about something he cares about. And if someone does anything to hurt you ... ooooooweeeeee, he would beat the living hell out of them.

𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒐𝒏𝒔

Protective Giant Teddy Bear BF; always gets things from the high shelf, gives you his jacket even if you aren't cold - is a bit traditional, but has the potential to be more open-minded if you want him to be

Loves when you massage his head, he gets a lot of headaches. Probably because he scowls a lot, and furrows his brows... or maybe he just thinks too hard?? Either way; his eyes turn to the back of his head when your hands connect with his scalp

Literally growls, has a lot of animalistic qualities and growling is the biggest show of it.

He likes to wash your hair for you. He admires your hair a lot and wants to make it as shiny and pretty as possible

Whenever you're out, he always has an arm around your shoulders. Especially when there's other men. He does get jealous easily but it's more of a protective thing than a jealous thing.

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈

Like Real People Do by Hozier

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔

More Alike Than Different

Malewife x Girlboss

Places His Wife Above Everyone

𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆

Home Is Wherever You Are But People Keep Trying To Tear Us Apart

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒊𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒗𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖

You give him a run for his money; you have a lot of wit and determination. A lethal combination. He loves that about you, the multidimensional aspects of your personality. You can stump him on the daily.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅

Inej, you two would just get each other. On another level. One where you don't have to talk every single day whenever you're together. You're on the same page.

𝑾𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆

A mix of Inej and Alina. Quiet, mysterious, and keep to themselves. You aren't too loud and definitely not overbearing like some people.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒑𝒆𝒕

A gorgeous little kitten had appeared out of an alleyway as you walked down the road. He was meowing, almost trying to talk to you. And then you started talking back to him. And than before you knew it, you were home and you felt rude not inviting him in.

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒

𝑫𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒊𝒑𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏

𝐼 𝑠𝘩𝑖𝑝 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑖𝑡𝘩 𝑆𝑡𝑒𝑣𝑒 𝐻𝑎𝑟𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑡𝑜𝑛! The charming, effervescent man of Hawkins. I think you two would be the ruling pair of the town. The perfect duo, the banter would be off the charts, because there would always be this lighthearted feeling when the two of you are together.

𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒐𝒏𝒔

The kids LOVE YOU, well... the teenagers love you. Especially Dustin, who blushes whenever you're around. And yes, Steve teases him relentlessly about it

You do help babysit them, you're like the babysitting couple. They call you Mom and Dad. Steve even feeds them, makes sure they've drunk enough water. He honestly sees them as his own in a way.

You don't understand the Upside Down completely, but you don't need to - you just get right in there and fuck the consequences.

Steve absolutely adores you. And he shows you by remembering every detail about you. Buying you your favourite flowers, picking up your favourite take away for lunch and/or dinner. He's also very affectionate, and loves hugs, kisses,, especially forehead kisses

While also being a great couple, you're also great as best friends. You even have a secret handshake.

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈

This Feeling by Alabama Shakes

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔

Hates Reading (Steve) x Lives For Reading (You)

Big Goals Girlfriend (You) x No Goals Boyfriend Who Tags Along Wherever She Goes (Steve)

Plant Dies (You) x Buys Them A New One (Steve)

𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆

Right Person, Wrong Time.

Had To Wait For Your Love

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒊𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒗𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖

Steve loves how creative you are! It blows his mind with what you come up with. Your imagination astounds him. He honestly sees you as some sort of genius. And yes, he does tell people his girlfriend is a genius.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅

Nancy. She really pushed you academically, you two would study together a lot. Gossip, sit together at school, and go to the library. You spend a lot of time together. And then she got together with Steve and it hurt. But you let it happen.

And years went by. Events happened. El came to Hawkins.

It took ages for Steve to realise his feelings but Robin helped him.

Nancy didn't mind at all that you two were together, it slightly hurt - but only slightly.

𝑾𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆

Nancy and Max. It's the love of reading, the bitchy side (as you said) that can come out, the determination and introvert who can become an extrovert when needed.

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒑𝒆𝒕

Your neighbourhood knows who your dog is. The large black German Shepherd that barks at anything that moves. He's incredibly protective of you, and waits for you to come home every day. He's your best friend.

#witchthewriter #aesthetic #match ups #personal aesthetic #pair ups #throne of glass #throne of glass pair ups #stranger things match ups #grishaverse pair ups

[bookofmirth]

“I have headcanoned for a really long time that Azriel self harms. I could see him cutting or otherwise purposefully injuring himself.”

I could definitely see this. Maybe he doesn’t wrap his hands when he trains and lets his skin get cut up and bruised easily and doesn’t let himself heal. If Azriel does cut himself, do you think his brothers would know or have their assumptions? I feel like if they did know it wouldn’t be because Az told them. I don’t think he would tell anybody.

Also, for Gwyn, how do you think she deals with her trauma? I know some people view her only as passive and optimistic/upbeat, (which there’s nothing wrong with), but I wonder if deep down she has some intense rage, (which would be very understandable) and deals with things like Azriel or Nesta, but hides it from everyone. We don’t have her POV, but I really want to know more about her character.

I use to cut myself and I’m a survivor of assault, so it makes curious, and a little nervous, as to how Sarah will approach these topics. I think she’s done research on disabilities for Chaol when writing TOD, but I can’t be too sure. Please correct me if I’m wrong.

First off anon, giving you the biggest virtual hugs ever, I am glad to hear that you aren't harming yourself anymore. It may never go away, but you've come out the other side stronger and wiser.

Yes, harming could be something that no one could accuse Azriel of doing intentionally, but instead they may notice him playing fast and loose with his own safety. I think we can already see a bit of that with the risks that he takes on his missions, how willing he is to do things to others (IE torture) without regard for how those actions might affect his own psyche. It would be really easy for him to brush off the injuries as being part of the job, for him to make excuses about how he was injured. If he pushes himself a bit harder than he needs to and he ends up in a dangerous position, then people might have a hard time saying he's actually being self-destructive, you know?

I don't think his brothers would know or that he would tell anyone. Just speaking from experience, if people know then they want to help and then you get attention and really you just want to suffer and self-destruct in isolation. He's a pretty closed book, he doesn't really share his inner life, and perhaps he doesn't even acknowledge those behaviors as being harmful? I kind-of headcanon that he thinks he deserves it. Also, I think that people who have never done anything like that just... will never get it. It's so foreign to them. It's fine that they don't, that just makes it really tricky to navigate telling anyone and then hoping to get an understanding response!

I see Gwyn's competitiveness and pushing herself to train as the way she is dealing with her guilt and grief over Catrin. I don't think she's self-destructive at all, but her attitude seems to be more along the lines of "never again". I am rereading acosf so if I find any quotes I'll add them. She's one of the characters that sjm has described as being kind and optimistic despite what she's gone through (like Mor and Elain), and so to me, her training is the way she is being proactive. Gwyn definitely carries guilt for her sister's death, but I think she knows cognitively that it wasn't her fault (also like Elain! who acknowledges that her father's death wasn't her fault, but still has regrets).

Funny story, but the omniscient narrator did actually give us a peek into Gwyn's mind in acosf.

Roslin, Ananke, and Deirdre were close on their heels, propelling Gwyn to push her group harder. She wanted to be the first. Wanted Nesta and Emerie and her to be the ones who wiped the smirks from Azriel’s and Cassian’s faces. Especially Azriel’s.

Gwyn didn't tell Nesta this information; the omniscient narrator is telling us Gwyn's thoughts and feelings. There may be other points in the book where this happens, it's just the first one that comes to mind!

But anyway, I don't know if I see rage in Gwyn, so much as I see determination for the events of her past to never be repeated, and to me, that comes out as her competitiveness towards Azriel, wanting to cut the ribbon, making it through the Blood Rite, etc.

Sjm did do research on disability! I went to her Tower of Dawn event in London (in 2017) and she mentioned interviewing people with Wounded Warriors Project to better understand their injuries and to try to write Chaol's experience with care. There isn't a recording of this event as far as I know, back in the day you either went in person to events or you waited for people to make recap posts on Tumblr. Fun fact, that event was also where she announced her first pregnancy!

I'm personally not worried about how sjm will handle either of their healing stories, mainly because I'm not sure that she would actually delve into the depths of Azriel's self destruction. She pulled Nesta's story away from those themes pretty quickly and easily in acosf, so...

I hope that their stories help you feel seen and understood, however they turn out <3

#gwyn #azriel #acotar #cw self harm #ask #anon

[rowanaelinn]

Illicit Affairs - Chapter Thirty-Nine

Masterlist

A/N: hey! if you have time after this chapter, maybe you could check another story I am writing with my incredible friend @morganofthewildfire? It’s called Tied Me To You, and if you love yourself some childhood friends to lovers and second chance romance… This fic is for you!

This was all written in less than a day, so please, be indulgent when it comes to my editing! I was just too excited to share this!

Warnings: Lots of language | Word Count: 6,000

Her head was pounding when she opened her eyes, enough to make her wince. The light was too bright for her eyes, she let out a quiet sob. She didn’t want to wake up, why did she have to? Someone let out a groan beside her, and it wasn’t hard to know it was Dorian.

“Close the lights,” he growled from where he laid on the floor.

“I can’t just turn off the sun,” she answered, her throat sore. She had done too much last night. Maybe doing too much was her mantra. She wasn’t exactly sure it was something to be proud of.

She fought against the throbbing pain in her head and opened her eyes. The living room was in a mess, which she supposed was the way a room should look after a party took place there.

When they started drinking yesterday, Lysandra and Chaol joined them, though they were much, much calmer than Dorian and Aelin. The both of them went to sleep early while Dorian and Aelin kept the party going.

Though she wasn’t sure she could exactly call that a party. She tatted on the table, looking for her phone. She held in another groan when she saw all the notifications on her home screen. She wiped them away; she wasn’t in the mood to be assaulted by texts at… eleven in the morning.

Her heart melted for a second at the sight of her home screen wallpaper. It was picture of Rowan, Aelin and Helia in vacation. They were laying on double sundecks, bathing into the sun.

It was the perfect picture to use, if only because neither Rowan nor Helia were recognizable. Rowan was laying on his side, back to the camera. His tattooed arm wasn’t visible, his silvery hair hidden by a hat. He was hugging her, his head nuzzled into her shoulder. Helia was laying on Aelin’s front, splayed out onto her and Aelin could almost hear her snoring. The only person awaken on this picture was Aelin. Her grin was bright on that picture, brighter than she had seen it in years. She loved that picture.

She opened her text app, only to find multiple texts Rowan had sent last night. And apparently, in her drunk daze, Aelin had texted him back a couple of times.

Rowan, 9:01pm: Tell me when you are home.

Rowan, 9:28pm: Aelin? Please, tell me if you’re home safe.

Rowan, 10:03pm: If you are mad, be mad. But don’t ignore me.

Aelin, 10:05pm: im safe buzzard

Rowan, 10:06pm: Come back, please. We can talk this out. I miss you.

Aelin, 10:13pm: can’t. im busy! ;)

She then sent a picture of her, Dorian and a bottle of tequila between their two smiling faces, their eyes red and smiles all wrong. They were so obviously drunk.

Rowan, 10:15pm: Are you drunk?

Rowan, 10:23pm: Please, be careful.

Rowan, 10:45pm: I miss you, Aelin. Things are going to work out, I promise.

Rowan, 11:52pm: Good night, Fireheart. Text me when you’re awake.

Oh, gods. He’d clearly voiced his concern for her last night, and she… ignored him. He didn’t seem angry in his texts, which she supposed was a good thing. It was hypocritical of her as she was the one who started a fight with him the day before, but she didn’t think she could handle it if Rowan was mad at her.

On the other hand, Aelin was allowed to have a night with her friends. He was the one who told her she cut everyone else off, so it wasn’t a bad thing if she did spend time with other people.

“My head is killing me,” Dorian’s voice was as broken as hers.

She chuckled, “Of course it does, pretty boy.”

He looked up from where he laid on the floor, raised on his elbows. “You think I’m pretty?”

She used her foot to push on his shoulder which made him crash face first. She laughed, hiding her face into her hands. It hurt to laugh but she didn’t stop, Dorian was so dramatic. She needed someone like that in her life.

She got up, still in yesterday’s clothes. “I’m making some coffee.”

Maybe she should call Rowan, though from what time it was, he was in class. Her class, the one she was supposed to attend. Fuck. Even if she jumped into fresh clothes now and that she drove to school she would still miss his class.

A note had been left onto the coffee machine.

Went to class, I will take notes for the two of you.

Rest, you deserve it! Take care,

Lys.

Great, as if she cares about the notes. All Aelin cared about was her professor, though she supposed Lysandra couldn’t know that. At least, Aelin’s tongue didn’t loosen up under the alcohol’s weight.

Dorian joined her into the kitchen, pouring them two glasses of water and placed one pain killer next to each glass. She thanked him and sat, waiting for the coffee to be ready. She drank the entire glass of water in one go, her throat and mouth feeling dry.

“Are you feeling better?”

She knew he didn’t ask that about her hangover. She shrugged, “I think I cried enough for three years last night.”

“That’s not an answer.”

Last night, after maybe her fifth shot, she burst into tears. She hadn’t stopped for hours. Her eyes still hurt, and she wasn’t keen into looking into a mirror right now. She needed ice. A lot of it.

Aelin shrugged, “I have no idea how I feel, if I’m being honest. It just… It doesn’t feel real.”

He nodded, standing to pour them two cups of burning coffee. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Aelin, but why did you come to us yesterday? When something is wrong, you usually go to your boyfriend. Has he done something?”

She shook her head, “No, no he is… the best. I was with him yesterday before I drove back here. But we… I picked a fight with him, I think I wanted him to be angry at me so I wouldn’t have to do it myself, you know?” He nodded. “But he didn’t, he didn’t insult me or yelled at me like I wanted him to.”

“What happened then?”

She took a deep breath, sipping on her coffee. “He has a daughter.”

“Oh.”

“She is… the light of my life. I love her so much, I don’t think words are enough to describe how much I love this little girl. But she… she picked up a habit of calling me mommy, it’s not all the time just… sometimes. She did yesterday, and I think it was too much. I realized I would never have someone to truly call me mommy, to consider me their mom. This girl, she is just… lost.”

“Where is her mom?”

“She passed in a car accident, she gave birth that same day. They never met.”

“It’s heartbreaking,” Dorian breathed, looking down at his smoking drink. “But… Maybe she isn’t lost, maybe she does see you as a mother. I mean, how old is she?”

“Going on four.”

“It’s young, and if she has no memory of her birth mother… What I’m trying to say is that you spend your days there, you love her very much too. I think you and I are the best to know that blood doesn’t mean anything, look at our families.”

“I cannot pretend to be her mother,” Aelin answered, pain in her voice. She wish she could, really she did. “I-Her father and I we are hiding from the entire world. She has known me only for a few months, Dorian. It would need years of trust being built for me to even pretend I could be a mother to her. Have you seen the mess I am? The first inconvenience and I run away to get drunk with friends.”

“Aelin,” he said. “Yesterday was not the first inconvenience. You learned something that truly hurt you and changed your entire future. Hell, you could have driven to a bar and gotten drunk alone, instead to sought help to a friend.”

“You’re trying to make me feel better.”

“Yes, but it doesn’t mean I’m lying.” He covered her wrist with his warm palm. “You are one of the best person I have ever met, Aelin. I have no idea how you just… survive everything life throws in your face.”

“I’m not that strong.”

He nodded, “You are. If I had a twin and I lost them the way you did… I wouldn’t be where you are, Aelin.”

She swallowed difficultly, her voice rough as she asked, “I told you about Celaena yesterday, didn’t I?”

He nodded again, “I have no idea how you just took everything in. But you did, and this is being strong. Yesterday you didn’t lash out at that girl, in a way you protected her by running away. Being a mother it’s not just taking everything in with no reactions, it doesn’t mean you are not human anymore.”

“But R-“ she stopped herself before she could say his name. “My boyfriend, her father, he is so good at it.”

“He has had almost four years to perfect it, and I… I assume he is older, isn’t he?”

She nodded. She didn’t want to say anything, didn’t want Dorian to find out. If it was just her, Aelin would tell him. But Helia… If it backfired, Helia would suffer from these consequences.

Helia and Rowan were the best thing to happen to Aelin, and no matter how much Rowan told her she could tell the people she trusted, she wouldn’t. Not if these was one tiny chance it would hurt them.

“You are still young, no matter how mature you are. Allow yourself time to grow, Ae.”

She sniffed and chuckled through the tears forming in her eyes, “When did you became so wise?”

He shrugged, a secret smile on his lips. “Being in a relationship changes you, doesn’t it?”

She nodded, “Yeah, it does.”

“Do you also sometimes feel as if you are taking too much from your partner? That you rely too much on them.”

She snorted, “All the damn time.”

“I’m not the only one, then,” he said, a hopeful look on his face.

“Thank you, Dorian. Thank you so much.”

—-

Aelin was patiently waiting in front of Rowan’s office door. She had forgotten her keys at his place last night, so she was cursed to wait for him to come. If he ever would. He didn’t always stopped by his university office, but it was worth a try.

If he didn’t come here, she would knock at his house’s door but… She didn’t want Helia to be exposed to their fight.

Should she text him? Tell him where she was, that she wanted to have a talk. But if he was busy… She could wait. His job should come first, he has always taken days off because of her appointments.

“Miss Galathynius?”

Her head snapped to the side, she awkwardly stood almost crashing onto the floor a few times. “Professor Whitethorn.” He looked her up and down, as if making sure she was okay. “Could we have a talk?”

He nodded, opening his office. “Of course.” He looked around, making sure no one was around. “Come in.”

She gave him a small, shy smile. She felt so, so guilty. She… she hadn’t asked him how he felt about it all. He closed the door behind them, and she barely had the time to open her mouth before he pulled her into a warm, tight hug.

“Oh,” she let out, surprised before she gripped him tightly. She pressed her head into his chest and breathed him in, it only hit her then how unhappy she felt if he wasn’t around. “This feels good.”

“It does,” he answered, squeezing her more. “I was worried for you, baby.”

“I’m sorry,” she said into his chest. She had no idea if he heard or understood her but he kissed her forehead.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” he breathed. “I’m not mad.”

She pulled back enough to look at his face, “How could you not? The way I acted…”

“Was because you were mad at yourself,” he finished for her. “Not at me, I know that. And I repeat, it’s okay.”

Her bottom lip wobbled, tears burning her eyes. It was only when she saw him, saw the vulnerability in his own eyes that she breathed, “It’s not fair. It’s not fair, Rowan.”

He nodded, silver lining in his green eyes. “I know, I know it’s not.”

Tears were steaming down her face now. Apparently, she hadn’t cried enough yesterday. She shook her head, “It was just a stupid party to annoy our parents. It was just that,” she tried to push on his shoulders, trying to get him away from her. He didn’t let go, he kept her flushed with his body. “But I keep losing things because of that stupid night.”

“Aelin…”

“I lost Celaena, then my parents became so cold and distant and now… And now that stupid night is taking away my future. Why? Tell me why,” she demanded, her voice rising. She was mad, she was mad at the entire world. She was mad at herself. Life would have been so different if she had just said no, if she hadn’t wanted to get back at her parents for yet another lonely night.

They weren’t paying the full price. She was.

“I can’t,” he breathed. “I can’t tell you why, because I don’t know. But I know I’m here,” he said, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. “Whatever life throws at you; it throws it at both of us.”

She shook her head, “It’s not fair. I don’t deserve that; I don’t deserve all this pain.”

“You are right, you don’t,” he nodded, cupping her cheeks and kissed her. “I love you. Things are going to be alright; we have solutions if we want them. This is hard, but it’s going to be okay as long as we have each other, alright?”

“How do you feel about that?” She asked, because she needed to know. It was her body but… he wanted his life with her. In the long run, it would affect him.

“I am…” He stopped for a second, breathing in. “Not doing too well, but I’m more focused on you now.”

“I’m so—”

He shut her up with a kiss, a hand covering the nape of her neck. “Don’t you apologize, alright?”

She nodded, rising on her tiptoes to steal a kiss out of him. He kept their mouth pressed together for a few more seconds, as if he would never get enough of her.

“Was Helia mad at me?”

He shook his head, “I don’t think she could be mad at you even if she wanted. She was just confused, but I told her it was nothing to worry about.”

“Thank you, and I’m sorry for freaking out when she called me mommy, it was just…”

“Too much,” he finished for her, and she nodded. Yes. It was too much. “I understand, Aelin. Stop apologizing for everything, none of it is your fault.”

“Thank you,” she whispered.

His forehead fell against hers, the two of them breathing the same air. “How’s your head?”

She groaned, letting out a half-fake, half-real sob. “It’s killing me, don’t remind me.”

He chuckled, “You looked cozy with that Tequila.”

“Make me promise to never drink again.”

He narrowed his eyes at her, “I think I already made you promise such a thing twice now. You broke that promise that same amount of time.”

“Ugh,” she closed her eyes, enjoying his proximity. “You’re so not funny.”

He shook his head and grinned, “Sit, I’ll get us some coffee, alright?”

She nodded, kissing him in thanks. She laid on the couch, because she was even too tired to sit. The material was stiff under her, Rowan really needed to change that couch. If only for her back’s sake.

A phone pinged, and it wasn’t hers. She looked around the room to find Rowan’s phone screen lit up on his desk. She grabbed it, only to find the strangest message there.

You will pay.

What the… She typed in his passcode, only for it to be wrong. Strange, his password had always been Helia’s birthday. Maybe she typed it wrong, but when she typed it again… It still didn’t work.

Her brows were furrowed, alright. That was very, very strange. She tried her own birthday but it didn’t work either.

Rowan came back with two steaming plastic cup of coffee, “A latte with extra sugar for you.”

She sat and grabbed the cup, but he couldn’t muster a smile. “You got a text.”

He stopped in his tracks, seating next to her. “And?”

She showed the phone screen to Rowan, “Why would someone send that to you?”

More than a thousand scenarios ran through her head, some more realistic than others. But her concern grew every second Rowan took to answer. He grabbed the phone and read it, the muscles in his jaw tensing. “Ro?”

“It’s okay,” he said, a hand on her thigh after he placed his phone on couch. “It’s nothing.”

“Nothing?” she hissed. “Someone wants to make you pay about something and you say it’s nothing?”

“Because it’s true,” he answered. “It’s just a student who is mad about his grade, alright? It happens from time to time.”

Her lips parted, “You’re joking right? A student?”

“It’s the truth.”

“And how would you know that? It came from a blocked ID.”

“I know because it happened before, it’s been delt with, alright? They are more talk than action, they always are.”

“So… All those texts you’ve reacted badly to it was them? Even when we were away?”

He sighed, his head falling back. “Yes. Yes, it was that.”

She cocked her head to the side, “Why didn’t you tell me? I worried, Rowan. You weren’t talking to me, and I know you don’t like to be pushed to talk but… I worried.”

“I’m sorry, alright?” he said, his voice coming up short. “I didn’t want to worry you. There were so many things on your mind already and as I said, this is harmless. It wasn’t worth worrying you.”

“So, I have to talk but you can keep things to yourself?”

He sighed, grabbing her hand, “I was trying to protect you. I would have told you once it was over, Aelin.”

“I just feel useless,” she admitted. “I feel useless in our relationship. You never tell me anything.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” he said, almost too easily.

“Do you promise you’ll be alright?”

He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and hugged her. “I protect you. Always. I promise.”

She nodded. That was good enough for now, she didn’t have the energy for another fight. He played with a strand of her hair, “You should pick up something to eat and go back home. Pour yourself a hot bathtub and relax, you deserve a few days off.”

She raised an eyebrow, “You allow me to skip classes?”

“I don’t care about school, I only care for your health.”

“I love you,” she breathed into his neck.

He kissed the crown of her head before whispering, “I love you, too.”

---

A week later, Aelin was still soaking daily into a hot bath. Rowan did know how to help her relax. Sometimes, he’d come back from work to find her in his bathtub, and he would join her, other times he would help her relax in other ways while she was still surrounded by water.

But today, she was alone. She had also taken another habit other than the bathtubs; she stopped going to a few classes. Not enough to stop school completely, but enough to take a step back.

Between Rowan, Helia, her infertility and the lies she kept feeding people… Aelin had needed a small, tiny break. Classes for the year were over soon, she could have waited for vacations to start and yet… She didn’t have the energy.

She took care of herself first, she was sure Yrene would be proud of that.

Helia was at her grandparents today and Rowan was a very, very busy surgeon. It was easy to forget, he was good at making time for her and Helia, but there were some days where she was painfully aware of it. And by that, she meant that she usually woke up alone and fell asleep alone. Rowan trusted her to care for Helia in those days, an honor Aelin tried to live up to.

But these days also meant that Aelin had alone time at his house, so she started spending time on herself. It wasn’t too bad, she supposed.

She was texting her friends when her father’s name appeared on her screen and her phone started ringing. “Hi, dad.”

“Aelin,” his voice seemed short. The hospital was very busy lately, and it did not only affect her boyfriend. Her father barely had time to text or call her in the last week or so. “How are you doing, darling?”

“Fine,” she said, her hand playing with pink foam over the water. “Very busy lately.” She hoped it didn’t sound as wrong as it felt. “You?”

“Mostly the same,” he answered. “Wait, aren’t you supposed to be in class at that time?”

She was, he was right. It only took her less than a second to think of a lie. She was becoming awfully good at that. “I’m at the library with Lys and Dorian. We sacrifice a few hours of classes to work a little more on the ones we struggle with the most.”

“Uh, yeah,” her father replied. “I remember doing that a few times, too. Just don’t make it a habit, alright, darling?”

She smiled, “Sure, dad.”

“Alright, listen. Would you come over tonight for dinner?”

“Tonight? That’s a little short notice.”

He chuckled, “I didn’t know a med student’s planning was so full she couldn’t see her parents anymore.”

She winced, “Yeah, sure. I’ll be there. When should I come over?”

“Around seven?”

“That’s good, see you tonight.”

They hung up and Aelin sighed, her head falling back onto the edge of the tub. Rowan had planned on cooking lasagna tonight; she really loved his lasagnas. Maybe she could tell him to leave her some leftovers.

She checked the time and sighed when she noticed she had to be at her parents in less than two hours. Shit. She stood into the bath, but it wasn’t considering how slippery a bathtub full of soap was.

Aelin lost her balance, she gripped the first thing she could hand her hands on, but it made her let her phone fall into the hot water. “Fuck!” she almost yelled, bending to retrieve her phone. She grabbed it a few seconds later, she got out of the tub and wrapped a towel around her chest. She sat on the border of the tub, pressing against the button of her phones but no matter what she did, it didn’t turn on.

“Shit! Fuck!” She hid her face in her hands, taking a few minutes to evacuate her frustration. It was alright, she had her old phone at her apartment. This PIN was dead, but she could buy a new one tomorrow.

But all of her pictures with Rowan and Helia… They were gone. For good. She shook her head, trying to put some sense into that damn mind of hers. She dressed quickly, deciding that she would get a dress her mother would accept at her apartment and took off. She still left a note in the kitchen for her boyfriend to find, and she thanked the gods she wasn’t the one planned on picking Helia up.

She still hadn’t met Lyria’s parents, and if she was honest, Aelin wasn’t in the mood to.

Going to my parents for the evening,

Save some Lasagna for me? I’ll thank you properly ;)

Love you lots! Kiss Lia goodnight for me, please. <3

Aelin.

No one was at her apartment when she opened the door. Good, she wasn’t really in the mood to talk. She’d cancel on her parents if she had any way to do just that. She put her old phone to charge as she picked up a long, black dress. Not very flattering but it wasn’t Aelin-ish enough for her mother to disapprove.

She only brushed her hair and straightened them, applying only a small amount of mascara on her eyes and blush on her cheeks. She hadn’t had a restful night, so she looked pale.

She smiled at herself in the mirror. Her old self, the one she had said goodbye to the moment she met Rowan. But this part of her… Aelin didn’t want it gone. Not entirely. This was the last bit she owned that also belonged to Celaena.

She shook her head, getting rid of the thoughts that were sure to bring tears in her eyes and she jumped into her car, driving to her parents. It would be good to spend some time with them, or at least with her father.

She drove with some mindless music in the background she sang along to, which made the drive feel a lot quicker than it was. When she parked in front of the house where she used to live it was already dark outside.

She opened the door and entered the living room, only to find her uncle Gavriel sitting on the thousand dollars couch, a glass of whiskey in his hand and his perfectly tailored suit covering his body. “Uncle,” she said, a little wary. “I thought tonight was just me and my parents.”

He stood and opened his arms for her, a kind smile lifting up his lips. “Sorry for intruding.”

She rolled her eyes and took him in her arms, “Nonsense, I love spending time with my old relatives.”

He chuckled, “You are always so nice, Niece.”

She cocked her head to the side and smiled, “I know, thank you!”

She looked around the room for her parents, but they weren’t there yet. She was glad they had invited her; it was the perfect occasion for her to do something she hadn’t yet dared to do. “I’m sorry,” she said too quickly. “For the last time we saw each other.”

He shook his head, “None of that. Things got heated on all parts, including mine. This was your fight with Aedion, I shouldn’t have taken part in it. But if I can say something; he misses you. Give him a call when you are ready.”

“Is he here?” She hoped he was. She missed him too, but pride was a tricky thing.

He shook his head and smiled sadly, “I’m afraid he is spending the night with Lysandra.”

“It’s okay,” she said. “Are they… Finally together?”

Her uncle took a deep breath, “I actually have no idea. Knowing my son, I suppose it means they aren’t.”

She snorted, “He’d be the type to brag about it everywhere.”

“I think he could call the mayor and ask him to do an announcement to the entire city,” her uncle joked along.

She laughed when the doorbell rang, “Are we expecting a new member of the family I didn’t know?”

He rolled his eyes, “Open that door, I’ll go look for your dad. I’m afraid he locked himself in his office again.”

She winked at him and went for the door, her heels clicking onto the floor. She opened the door, her breath escaping her lungs. “What are you doing here?” She hissed, closing the door behind her after she looked, making sure no one had seen.

Rowan stood in front of her, looking as tired as he was handsome. He couldn’t be here, shouldn’t be here. Her parents were right in the damn house. “I tried to call you at least twenty times,” he said, careful of the level of his voice. “I kept sending me to voicemail.”

“My phone’s dead,” she answered, almost whispering. “But what the fuck are you doing here?”

“Your father asked me to,” he hissed back. Scared. Her boyfriend looked scared. It took her by the guts, he was so levelheaded usually.

“Why?”

“You think I asked?”

“Well,” She looked around, breathing in deep to not let any fear rise in her. “Why the hell didn’t you? It’s probably the first thing I would have done.”

“If the father of my secret girlfriend who also happens to be my boss asks me to do something, I don’t ask questions. I do everything he said.” He snapped, not raising his voice. Obviously, he was anxious.

“Fuck.” She breathed, passing a hand through her hair and pulling out a few strands.

“Aelin, what is happening.” He demanded.

“Just… Just give me one second, alright.” She was going to have a panic attack. It didn’t make sense, none of what had happened in the last two hours made sense. Why wouldn’t her father tell her he invited Rowan?

“If you didn’t notice it’s kind of a pressing matter.”

She glared at him. As if she didn’t notice. She took a deep breath and said “He doesn’t know.”

“How do you know that?”

“Your face isn’t bloody, that’s what tells me that.”

“You think he would punch me?” Rowan sounded scared, as if he would run away.

“Where do you think I picked my temper from?”

“Oh, fucking Gods,” he breathed, barely loud enough for her to hear.

“Where is Lia?” Oh, Gods. What if he brought her here?

“She is having a sleepover with her grandparents. Aelin, I need you to tell me if I’m about to get punched.” Oh, so she really scared him.

“I-I don’t think you will, alright?”

“You don’t think?” He hissed.

“I’m ninety-two percent sure.” She snapped back. That was what she did under pressure, always snapping.

“Fuck.”

“My father seemed worried about how I handle my time. Maybe this is a committee to say, ‘You’re fucking up again, Aelin!’ or something along those lines. It would be very fitting of my family.” He looked at her, eyes softening. But before he could, the door behind her opened.

“Aelin?”

“Uncle Gavriel,” she breathed, trying to give him her best smile. “This is my professor, Doctor Whitethorn. Doctor, this my uncle.”

“Nice to meet you, sir.” Rowan extended a hand to her uncle who shook it and gave Rowan a nod.

“I wonder why that dear niece of mine didn’t offer you to come in, she is not usually this rude.” He joked.

“Uncle…” Was he serious?

“Please, come in, Doctor Whitethorn. My sister and brother-in-law are on their way, they are on the phone.” Gavriel opened the door wide enough for Rowan to enter the house. He’d already been there. It was where they met, after all. “We’ve seen each other already, didn’t we?”

“At a dinner, a few weeks ago,” Rowan confirmed. “But we didn’t have the occasion of being introduced to one another.”

“Right,” her uncle said. “Can I offer you anything to drink?”

“Sure,” Rowan breathed, “Whatever you’re having.”

She glared at him, trying to communicate everything she couldn’t say in words. Mainly, she just wanted him to find an excuse and get the hell out of here. It was probably the first time she didn’t throw herself on the occasion to spend time with her boyfriend. “So, Doctor, what is your specialty?”

“Neurosurgery,” Rowan didn’t lack his usual pride as he answered. “I used to be one of Doctor Galathynius’ students.”

“And one of the best,” a deep voice interrupted them from behind. Aelin turned around to find her father and mother walking into the room. She hugged her father first, then her mother. She looked her up and down, “You look pretty, darling.”

She smiled, “Thank you, mom.”

“I see you already started drinking,” her father chuckled, “I will gladly join you.”

All of them fell into a conversation, Rowan quieter than her parents and uncle but he still spoke a few times. Aelin, on the other hand, felt like a true outcast.

Only Rowan seemed to see it, throwing her glances every few seconds. She sent him secrets, barely-there smiles. Even in a room full of people who had known her for her entire life, Rowan still was the only person to truly see her.

The real her.

“Shall we eat?” Her mother asked.

“Gods,” she groaned. “I’m starving.”

“Aelin,” she hissed. “It’s not proper.”

She swallowed, “Sorry.”

Evalin shook her head and led her guests to the dining room. Her spine straightened when she felt the brushing touch of a hand down her back.

Her father was at the head of the table, with her mother on his left and uncle on his right. Aelin sat beside Gavriel, and she happened to be in front of Rowan. The first course was served, and Aelin focused on eating it like a proper lady while the adults were talking. She was feeling like a child, only here for decoration.

“Doctor Whitethorn,” her mother asked. “What do you think of Aelin’s progress in classes?”

She stopped dead at that question, and so did Rowan. She nudged him under the table with her foot. He coughed and took a sip of his water. “I think Miss Ashryver Galathynius,” thank gods he remembered to use her mother’s last name too. “Is a brilliant student. Me and her other professors only notice improvement in her knowledge, as well as curiosity to always look for more when she is taught about something.”

Her mother’s smile was proud at these words. She looked at her and send a nod this way, her own way to congratulate her, Aelin supposed.

“It’s good to hear that.” Her father answered. “Some of her professors took contact with us to voice their concern. Apparently, Aelin has been skipping quite a lot of classes lately.”

What.

The.

Fuck.

“Is it something you noticed, as well?” Her father asked, without ever looking at her way. What was he playing?

Was this entire night to humiliate her? Because she was slightly drifting away from the path that had been chosen for her?

Rowan looked at her only once, barely more than a second, before he answered, “I do not think it’s such an unusual behavior. A lot of students, by that time of the year, choose which course they need to put the most of their energy for the finals. I don’t think Miss Ashryver Galathynius’ grades have been dropping in other courses, I know they only improve in mine. So, this is not something I would spend too much time wondering about.”

She wanted to kiss him right now. If she could, she would lean over the table and press their lips together. Hell to properness.

“Thank you for your honesty, Doctor Whitethorn,” her mother answered in her diplomatic voice.

“Dad…” Aelin breathed. “I told you; I pick the courses that need my full attention. My mind is only on succeeding, ask any of my friends they would tell you.”

They would lie for her, at least. She was sure of it.

“I hear you, Aelin. It is my job as a father to worry,” he answered. “One last thing, Doctor Whitethorn.”

“Anything, chief,” Rowan answered. He looked oh-so-relaxed, even if she could hear the tension in his voice.

Rowan was as good a liar as she was. They truly were a match. She pressed her lips together to avoid smiling at the thought, her timing was all wrong.

“What I’m wondering now,” her father said, finishing his one last sip of whiskey, “Is why, in Mala’s name, you thought it was a good idea to screw my daughter?”

••••••

Listen, it HAD to happen at one point…. Right?

Sorry for the hell that is about to hit us all.

••••••

@sheharahu // @morganofthewildfire // @thestoriesyoutell // @fromthelibraryofemilyj // @swankii-art-teacher // @itsforeverinnocent-blog // @becarefuloflove // @imnotsogoodatthis // @rowaelinismyotp // @a-court-of-milkandhoney // @feysand-loml // @elentiyawhitethorn // @live-the-fangirl-life // @story-scribbler // @loves-books // @fangirlprincess09 // @theysayitscrazy // @danibutterr // @endlessdaydream // @thegreyj // @gracie-rosee // @acreativelydifferentlove // @cretaceous-therapod // @louphantomdragon // @mis-lil-red // @backtobl4ck // @whoever-you-choose-to-love // @lemonade-coolattas // @mad-madeline-ace // @the-introverted-bibliophile // @leiawritesstories // @emilyoftheshadows // @anniesbookshelf // @rainbowcheetah512 // @astra-ad-mare // @story-scribbler // @superspiritfestival // @wordsafterhours // @rowaelinrambling // @black-daisy-water // @fireheart-violet // @livsdriverslicense // @charlizeed // @ladykreads // @mariamuses // @autumnbabylon // @justreadertings

#rowaelin #rowan whitethorn #rowaelin fanfiction #rowan x aelin #throne of glass fanfiction #aelin galathynius #illicit affairs

[starryhiraeth]

TOG pregnancy tropes

Lorcan-

•THIS MAN! He goes from protective to basically your shadow

•contact.always.

•full on GROWLS at anyone near you

• you: “Lorcan,hunny.you can’t kill everyone who looks at me”

Lorcan: *holding a man up by his collar* HE LOOKED AT YOU FOR 2 SECONDS TOO LONG

•you have twins,2 girls called Antonella and Ariadne

Rowan-

•He WORSHIPS the ground you walk on

•always makes sure you are the most comfortable you can be

•will fly across the entire world just to get you the food you were craving and be back in time to do all the chores while you eat it (as you find it hard to move)

• “okay so. I just came back from the southern continent to get you the chocolate,now sit there as I make the bed”

•you have a daughter called Zara

Chaol-

•Chaol is probably one of the more sensible but also worrisome

•he’s is really scared someone will hurt you and as a result,becomes your personal escort,EVERYWHERE

•prepared to carry you whenever even if you say your fine

• “I don’t care if we are in the middle of a ball,you need to rest therefore I will be carrying you”

• you have a son called Avel

Dorian-

•His phantom hands will always be on you.ALWAYS

•he knows you don’t want to give up your duties as queen so he brings you all your work to do in the comfort of your shared bed.

•total feminist,backs you up when you want to work and helps you rest,willingly gives you messages too

• *talking to a sexist lord who basically said you were useless*

“Excuse you! my queen can carry a child AND run a country.she is doing a better job then ALL of you. I’d like to see you carry and child and run a kingdom!”

•A girl called Callia

Fenrys-

•when you in public he turns to his wolf form so he can scare anyone you don’t know,away from you

•lots of picnics with healthy food for the baby

•basically one giant teddy bear

•bedrest Is a must,after losing his brother,he is terrified something bad will happen to you,so If only to calm him down,you will take bedrest

•twins,one girl,Velvela and a boy,Idan

Sartaq-

•he is as shocked but afterwards he was running around trying to make sure your safe at all times

•you would run off and have fun with his siblings and he would almost die of panic

•after that incident he makes sure he is always with you

•spoils you absolutely rotten!

•you have a son,Dante

Sam-

•You were one the courtesans so he was very nervous about Arobynn and Clarisse finding out

•visits you every single day,literally,you and this child are the most important thing in the world to him

•most gentle boyfriend ever!

•worried he won’t be a good father seeming as he is an Assassin and you always try to convince him other wise

• “what do you mean someone anonymously paid your debt to clarisse ?”

•you have a daughter called Violet

Aedion-

•Excited as FUCK!

•You find out your having triplets and he tells everyone he’s got a magic dick

•Gavriel helps out a lot and is excited for his grandchildren

•he will have full on conversations with your stomach,like even arguments

• Aedion: what do you think

Baby:*kicks*

Aedion: *gasps* YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

•you have triplets

Oldest is a girl-Adelaine

Then a boy-Alexander

And last,another girl-Amelia

Gavriel-

•he is super serious about the whole ordeal,he doesn’t want to mess up being a father again

•be prepared to be basically baby sat,like literally and you cannot tell me he doesn’t want to make loads of stuff for the baby

•extremity Loving,random kisses to the head,lips,shoulder and tummy

•Aedion is very happy to be a big brother

• “so I made a cot,a rocking horse,a bed for when they are bigger and I even learned to nit and made a little blanket

•you have a girl,Eleanora

Arobynn-

(This one is for my cousin,you owe me Megan)

•protective,almost possessive

•you were his queen anyway but now that you carrying his heir,ooooooo just wait! This man will find you the best maternity clothes,covered in diamond and gold and every gem you could image

•he makes it known he will have an heir but let’s no one near you and will get violent with anyone asks to many questions about you or his child

•has extra guards EVERYWHERE and calls your child “the little killer” at first you protested but since he won’t stop you just can’t be assed to correct him

• “so Dearest,how is our little killer”

“Arobynn!”

“What?!”

•You have a girl-Anastasia

I can do one where babies are toddlers if u want?

#throne of glass #lorcan salvaterre #rowan whitethorn #chaol westfall #dorian havilliard #aedion ashryver #arobynn hamel #sam cortland #gavriel #sartaq #fenrys moonbeam #sarah j. maas #booktok

[starseternalnighttriumphant]

RATING: M for mature; not suitable for readers under 18 years old, read at your own risk.

WARNINGS: May include material that may be triggering. Possible graphic depictions of violence, sex, trauma, and death; strong language use.

CHAPTER WARNING: explicit sexual content

“Everyone pair up and get your asses up in the air.”

Rowan winced slightly at Aelin’s abrasive tone. It was currently 6:07am and thankfully everyone had managed to make it right on time. Aelin had been standing in the hangar, already dressed in her flight suit, her eyes on her watch as she dramatically tapped her foot. Two minutes after 6am, they were geared up and standing at attention.

Now they scrambled through their pre-flight checks, making sure everything was up to standard and all controls were working. As they all strapped in and powered up, their commander’s voice sounded over the comms.

“For this exercise, I’m going to stay on the ground and watch from here. Run through the basic maneuvers and then…” He could practically hear the wicked grin. “I want to see an all out dog fight.”

Despite himself, he let out a rough laugh. Even as teens on the brink of adulthood at the academy, Aelin had been bloodthirsty. Her hotheadedness often got her in trouble, but she was ruthless and lethal in the air. Their instructor, Darrow, had hated her haughtiness but even he would grudgingly admit it had been a long time since he’d seen someone fly as well as Aelin did.

As soon as they were up in the air and done with their practice maneuvers, Aelin’s voice crackled over comms again. “Whoever is the winning duo will have the pleasure of running a two versus one dogfight drill with yours truly.”

Rowan couldn’t fight the grin that spread across his lips. A plan already started forming in his mind. Maybe a two versus one fight would be exactly what Aelin needed to gain a bit of closure when it came to her vow of hatred towards him and the Cadre.

Rowan and Lorcan worked together to effectively eliminate everyone one by one: Aedion and Ren went first, followed by Dorian and Chaol, then Fenrys and Connall. In less than half an hour, Rowan and Lorcan were the winners and Aelin was announcing that she would be up in the air soon.

“Whatever you’re planning, don’t fuck it up,” Lorcan told him.

“We got this,” he said simply.

He turned the plane towards where Aelin was coming up at them fast. She blew by them and then the fight was on. Their planes rolled and chased each other, both of them too good at what they did to effectively lock targets on the other. She performed a textbook perfect Immelman maneuver in front of them and then dived down, effectively moving out of their field of vision.

“Shit, where is she?” Lorcan muttered. Rowan rolled and then swore as he quickly corrected, the wing of Aelin’s plane barely missing theirs as she came up from under them.

“Careful boys,” she drawled with laughter in her voice.

They raced through the air and Rowan bit out a curse when she managed to evade his target again.

“Stop fucking playing, Fireheart,” he growled.

“Fine, you want to really do this?”

The light atmosphere from moments ago was now gone. Her tone grated his nerves. “Let’s go.”

He pulled the joystick in a hard right, rolling the plane so they were completely upside down and on top of Aelin. She glanced up at him and then nosedived towards the ground. He followed her, trying to cut her jetstream. She pulled up and to the left and Rowan’s stomach clenched painfully as he had to bank hard to correct their flight pattern and follow her.

She shot up and then performed the same maneuver Rowan had just done minutes ago. “I thought you wanted to quit playing.”

He grit his teeth and tipped the plane down, Aelin following.

They began a completely vertical downward spiral, the ground rapidly getting closer and closer.

“Are you going to take the shot or what?” Aelin demanded, her eyes locking with this. “You know what to fucking do, Buzzard. You put yourself in this strategy, get yourself out. If you don’t, you kill yourself and poor Reaper.”

“Rowan, pull the fuck up now,” Lorcan roared in the headset.

“Gods damn you,” he rasped to Aelin, pulling on the joystick hard. His breath left him momentarily as he pulled up, leveling his plane and shooting back up just as his altitude monitor had started yelling at him to.

His eyes darted all around him, no sign of Aelin’s plane anywhere. Mala above, if she had somehow managed to crash…

“Where is she, Reaper?” he asked Lorcan. “Do you see her?”

“No, damn it all—”

“And now you’re fucking dead,” came her drawl and then beeping noises and a fake explosion noise sounded, letting him know she’d successfully downed him and Lorcan.

She pulled up on his left and looked over at him. “Get on the ground now, airmen.” Her voice was hard and cold, and he knew without a doubt he’d fucked up.

He was sweating excessively by the time he’d landed and clambered down out of his plane, Lorcan following him. He pulled off his helmet just as he caught sight of Aelin climbing out of her own jet, his death on the horizon as she stalked towards him. She yanked off her helmet and threw it at him. He managed to deflect it but was not ready for her lithe frame to stand toe to toe with him, her beautiful face scrunched up in anger.

“If you ever pull a stunt like that again I will have you dishonorably discharged, Captain,” she thundered, her fists wrapping up in the fabric of his suit.

As if she suddenly realized they had an audience, she flicked her gaze at them and then let him go. “Orynth Squadron, get dressed and have your asses parked in the Ready Room before I get there or so help me, I will make sure you regret the day any of you  met me.”

She stalked off towards a different hangar than the one they’d met in and as they all cast uneasy looks at each other, they did what they were told. They hopped into their respective vehicles after the fastest wardrobe change they’d ever performed and raced for the base.

They made it to the Ready Room in record time, and Rowan knew they all watched the clock tick as they waited for whatever verbal lashing Aelin had planned. Twenty-four minutes passed before the door to the room opened and slammed shut, the sound of boots echoing in the room that was so silent they could’ve heard a pin drop.

She walked to the front of the room, dressed in fatigues just like the rest of them, and turned to face them. She looked each man in the eye before she spoke.

“I thought Gavriel made it clear as day that you all were to respect me and follow my orders,” she said in a tight voice.

No one spoke.

“Someone better answer me in three fucking seconds—”

“Yes ma’am, Colonel Ashryver was very clear about what he expected from us,” Aedion said and Rowan’s jaw clenched at the smugness in his voice.

“Does anyone know what happens when you don’t follow your superior officer’s orders? Especially in the air, on a mission?” she asked.

“We… get written up?” Fenrys suggested and Rowan wanted to disappear into the floor.

“You die,” Aelin barked, sending Fenrys an icy glare.

Everyone stayed silent.

“This isn’t a normal mission, boys,” she stated, tone uncompromising. “If this was, you wouldn’t have been chosen. Orynth Squadron is the most elite fighter jet force in the military. This mission could end disastrously. Some of us might not walk away from it. So when Colonel Ashryver told you all to respect me, listen to everything I tell you to do, and remember that I’m in charge, he fucking meant it. I will not lose fellow airmen and jeopardize this mission just because you all can’t follow orders.”

She looked at each one of them again, her eyes lingering on Rowan. “Understood?”

A chorus of respectful “Yes, ma’am!”s rang out.

“Is that understood, Captain Whitethorn?” she enunciated, and Rowan realized he hadn’t joined in with the rest of the group.

And it was her tone, the way she looked down her nose at him that had him snapping.

“With all due respect, Major Galathynius,” he said in the most disrespectful voice possible, “your vendetta against certain airmen in this squadron has clouded your vision. As a commanding officer, your actions were not only dangerous but childish and unbefitting for someone looking to make Lieutenant Colonel.”

He almost, almost felt bad when he saw those words had hit their mark. She took a step back as if he had slapped her.

“Everyone get the fuck out,” she ordered in a voice so cold that it had seven grown ass men flinching and hauling ass out of the room, casting sympathetic glances towards Rowan.

Rowan’s blood was still pumped with adrenaline, his heart racing. He watched her follow the rest of his squadron to the door and then lock it behind them. He swallowed hard at the fire he saw in her eyes when she turned her gaze on him. He stood as she stormed his way.

“You deliberately disobeyed me and tried to undermine my authority!” she yelled, face alive with rage.

He let out a disbelieving laugh. Unbelievable. The woman was so wrapped up in her own fucking misery that she was blind to everything except the past that festered between them.

“It’s been ten fucking years, Aelin!” He burst out, anger crawling along his skin. “And you can’t find it within yourself to actually heal from what happened. You can’t forgive anyone even though it was no one’s fault but what I really think the issue here is, is that you can’t forgive yourself.”

“Shut up, don’t you dare—”

“You hate yourself for what happened, don’t you? You hate that you and Sam were growing apart, you hate that you felt something for me, you hate that you never got to reconcile with him before that accident happened. It was a freak accident, Fireheart. We can’t change what happened. And I am so fucking sorry that Sam died. But he’s dead, Aelin. And he wouldn’t want you to live like this, to drown yourself in the hatred you feel.”

“You’re right,” Aelin bit out viciously, her chest heaving. “He’s fucking dead, Rowan. I cheated on him and I didn’t feel an ounce of guilt about it and before I could even try to fix things he. fucking. died. I will never forgive myself for that.”

And just like that, his anger vanished and his heart broke for her. He took a step towards her. “Aelin—”

“Just stop!” she screamed at him, and his stomach dropped as her face broke. “I hate you, Rowan. I hate that I kissed you, and I hate that I was falling in love with you, and I hate that for the past ten godsdamn years I missed you so much. I hate you—”

He didn’t register what he was doing until his hands were in her hair and his mouth was covering hers, cutting off the words that she wielded like daggers. She let out a muffled noise of surprise and then her hands came up to grip the back of his neck. Her nails dug into his skin as she pulled away, gasping for air.

“This doesn’t change anything,” she said breathlessly. “I still hate you.”

“I don’t care,” he grounded out, grabbing her by the throat and yanking her back in.

She didn’t seem to really care either as his mouth crashed against hers. He all but ripped her shirt out from where it was tucked into her pants, pulling it up and over her head and throwing it somewhere across the room. She toed her boots off as they fought to get each other undressed, Aelin only succeeding in getting his shirt off before he had her bra off and her pants around her ankles.

He wrapped an arm around her waist and lifted her onto the desk, his mouth never leaving hers as his free hand pushed her panties to the side and immediately plunged his fingers into her. She cried out against his mouth and he pulled away with a groan, looking down between them.

“Shit,” he muttered, relishing in how wet she already was. He pumped her slowly, curling his fingers to hit her g-spot. “You say you hate me, baby, but look at how fucking wet you are for me.”

“Fuck off,” she growled, pushing his hand away and sliding off the desk, dropping to her knees in front of him.

She shoved his pants and underwear down his legs, immediately taking his rock hard cock into her mouth. Gods, she was going to make his brain melt. He may not have known it way back then, but he could acknowledge now that he had always wanted Aelin. A lot of late nights with his own hand, thinking about the foul-mouthed blonde that was currently sucking the life out of him.

When her teeth scraped along his length, he hissed and grabbed a fistful of her hair, pulling her mouth off his cock. “I don’t think so.”

He grabbed her up and spun her around, a rip sounding through the air as her panties all but disintegrated in his hands. One hand locked on the back of her neck, he held her down on the desk and kicked apart her legs, his other hand running over the curve of her ass as he positioned himself behind her. He slid his cock along her folds, gathering up her wetness.

A thought flashed through his head and he groaned but didn’t stop his movements. “Aelin, I don’t have a condom.”

“I’m on birth control and I’m clean,” she gasped, pushing against him and he swore as the head of his cock slipped into her.

“Luckily for us, so am I,” he muttered and then slammed into her. Her cry of surprise filled him with a euphoric high.

Holy fucking gods, she was amazing. She was hot and wet and tight. He twitched inside of her and the hand not on her neck gripped her hip hard, fingers digging into her skin as he silently ordered himself to calm the fuck down. He started to move slowly, pulling out and then pushing back into her, hips flush against her ass.

“Fuck me like you hate me, Rowan,” she breathed, wriggling on the desk.

His teeth threatened to crack as he clenched his jaw. Gods, if only she knew. She’d shattered his heart that day ten years ago. But in all that time, he could never find it in himself to hate her. He knew she had been broken, had been so full of pain that she couldn’t see how much he needed her and how much she needed him. When it became apparent that he might never see her again, he’d tried to move on but fuck if he hadn’t been able to.

He slid his hand from the back of her neck to her throat, hauling her up against him, his lips at her ear.

“Is that what you want, love?” he asked in a soft voice, fucking her slowly.

“Either give me what I want or fucking leave,” she hissed.

He slammed into her hard, forcing a groan from her mouth. “I’m going to fuck you so hard that you’ll still feel every inch of me even after we’re done here. All you’ll be able to think about is how good I gave it to you. I’m going to ruin you for anyone else, love.”

And then he gave her exactly what she wanted. He fucked her roughly, pace fast and hedonistic. The sound of skin on skin filled the air, joining moans and grunts. His hand tightened around her throat, only applying enough pressure to take her breath away. He felt her pulse quicken against his fingers and the sensation made his eyes roll with pleasure. He released her throat and she gasped out as she fell back to the desk, her hands reaching up to grab the edge with white knuckles. When her walls squeezed his cock he let out a filthy curse and picked up his pace, balls slapping against her skin.

He reached around to part her slit further, thumb finding her clit. He rolled the sensitive nub between his thumb and index finger and she called out his name, one of her hands coming down to grip his wrist hard but she didn’t stop his ministrations. He could feel her slick drip down his cock and he knew that if she didn’t come soon he would lose his godsdamn mind.

He leaned over her, chest pressed to her back as his free hand fisted her hair and yanked her head back, his lips at her ear again. “Is this everything you dreamed of, Fireheart? Is this what you thought about when you grinded on my lap all those years ago?”

She mumbled something and he pulled her head back further, a groan escaping her throat. “What was that? I didn’t quite catch it.”

“I pictured a little less talking,” she answered, sass coating her tone.

He chuckled and righted himself. He slid his hand down her back, feeling the notches of her spine. When he reached her ass cheek, he gave it a sharp slap. The noise she let out had his balls tightening.

“Harder,” she begged.

His brain was going to short circuit and then set on fire. He didn’t know this wanton creature beneath him and he found himself wanting to explore every part of her, every dark corner of her mind, give her every single ounce of pleasure. He resumed his teasing of her clit and gave her another smack, palm zinging. She groaned, her pussy clenching his cock. He smacked her ass once more, giving her clit a slight pinch at the same time.

She called out his name and her walls spasmed around his cock, her legs shaking against his as her orgasm washed over her. He sped up his pace, balls deep as he fucked her until his own orgasm chased the tail end of hers, emptying himself into her.

He’d barely stopped twitching before she was standing up and rounding on him, hands shoving down on his shoulders until he found himself flat on his back on the floor. She climbed atop him, sinking onto him and he almost couldn’t believe he was already hard again, ready for another round.

Aelin braced her hands on her chest as she moved on him, grinding her clit against the flat plane of his pelvis every time she came down.

“Aelin,” he hissed as she rode him, his fingers digging bruises into her hips as he helped her slam down onto him.

“Make me come again, Rowan,” she pleaded.

He would give her anything she wanted. Her face was flushed pink, tiny wisps of hair stuck to her forehead with sweat. She looked like a fucking goddess. He reached up to grab her throat as his other hand rubbed her clit roughly while she bounced on him.

He squeezed her neck again and when he released her, she was crying out his name over and over as she shattered for him again. He grabbed her ass in his hands and took over her movements as she just spasmed and writhed on his cock, fucking her hard and spilling inside her as her name joined his in the air of the room.

Her body fell against his, their chests heaving in sync as they lay there in silence. Rowan stared at the ceiling, every piece of his mind scattered. Gods, it was almost embarrassing to admit that this had been the best sex of his entire life. All those fantasies of his, they paled in comparison to the real thing. He was suddenly afraid that she had ruined him instead. He was never going to get her out of his head after this.

He was pulled back to the present when Aelin got off him, immediately finding her discarded clothes and pulling them on. He sat up and watched her. She refused to meet his eyes, focusing on shoving her feet back into her boots.

Only once she had finished putting herself back together did she look at him, and he knew that whatever had transpired between them would not happen again. Her eyes were blank, emotions locked back behind that fortress she kept built around her.

“Thanks for the ride, Captain Whitethorn,” she purred and then spun on her heel and left the room, leaving Rowan still on the floor buck ass naked.

-

@sassyhobbits​​ @werewolffprince​ @schmlip-scribble​ @empire-of-wildfire​ @charincharge​ @tiredbutstillreading @aelinchocolatelover​ @goldryngalathynius​ @haemae2k2019​ @darling-im-the-queen-of-hell​ @pleasant-void-of-many-fandomsxx @thegreyj​ @to1whatever1end @tomtenadia​ @violet-mermaid7​ @swankii-art-teacher​ @dealfea​ @islarowanrhysiecassie​ @mis-lil-red​ @clea-nightingale​ @jorjy-jo​ @sunballhatbitch​ @leiawritesstories​ @stardelia​ @backtobl4ck​ @empress-ofbloodshed​ @icecream52 @llyncooljones​ @morganofthewildfire​ @rowanaelinn​ @fireheart-violet​ @wtfisdramione​

#ace by starseternalnighttriumphant #rowaelin au #ace chapter 4

[pearblossommina]

ToG Read-A-Long, Kingdom of Ash, day 7

Ch 51 “because I’m trying to understand. How you could come to love a monster.”

ELIDE BABY DID YOU JUST PROFESS YOUR LOVE FOR HIM

YOU SWEET BABY BEAR CUB

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

lol I cannot COMPREHEND why they’re still fighting the reason feels so convoluted at this stage. If they could just make up I think I would be very happy.

Ch 52

“Do you think the Ironteeth are capable of change?”

I think everyone is capable of change. It doesn’t happen instantly and it doesn’t happen without effort. But yes. I do. I believe in change. ILU Manon.

Dorian bird ~ you got this baby ~ bird up

Ch 53

Ah Lysandra. At least you’re alive - all hope is not lost!

This breakup makes more sense to me. They’re both at fault for being cruel to each other. And it’s hard to see the loving, tender side of their relationship when they weren’t really given that much time to explore it before the shit hit the fan.

Aedion getting discharged as General, that’s rough buddy. And Aelin still isn’t recognized as Queen by Darrow. Probably it was a bad choice to do this whole Lysandra charade… lol… even if Aelin comes back, guns-a-blazing, ready to rule, he’s probably gonna hold this against her for this show of irresponsibility. It was partially her plan, so… he’s not wrong…. Darrow’s an asshole but he also kind of knows things and I respect him for some reason

Ch 54

I don’t think I know what’s going on with Father Westfall. Are we supposed to hate him, or is he on our side? He seemed to be getting along with Chaol at last, and now Aelin is like “please do rot in hell” lol

(I guess even if he’s on our side, he can still be a prick)

(Chaol one day you’ll be a father too)

(So be careful not to carry on the tradition of being terrible to your children)

(The generational trauma stops here)

Aelin is the true Queen of the faeries, maybe having this title will make her want to live. To see that peaceful future for all the faeries who want to come and join her kingdom on her continent.

Ch 55

Omg Dorian you’re literally the best 😂 please explore your gender, I love everything about this

“He'd thought he'd known everything about the female body. How to make a woman purr with pleasure. He was half-tempted to find a tent and learn firsthand what certain things felt like.”

OMG PLEASE GO FIND MANON AND HAVE LESBIAN SEX!!!! Do it!!!! Do it for meeeeeee!!!

“Manon had nearly passed his training area when she went rigid.

Slowly, she turned, nostrils flaring.”

If Manon and Dorian decide to have kinky shapeshifting lesbian sex I take it all back. I’m going to become the world’s biggest Manorian shipper

Lolllll I am living for this. Yummy, yummy feelings. FEEL FOR HIM MANON. You feel so many feelings right now you don’t know what to DO.

Aw. Here come the big bad Witch Matrons, here to spoil my fun

Ch 56

“Dorian did not look away this time at the head that tumbled to the ground. “

UGH YES Manon is so badass 😍

God I love her

“Manon watched as the wyvern rose higher and higher.

Her grandmother did not look back before she vanished into the skies.”

Manon - WHY

You had her! You could have ended her. What a disappointment.

Queen of all Witches - yaaaas queen!!!!

Ch 57

(This marks the place I took another extended three-day reading break)

(Which felt good but also ahh omg I’m far behind again)

(I love Warrior Aelin)

(She’s so badass)

(Go get ‘em girl)

(You got this)

#tog read along 2023 #kingdom of ash #just a little behind the times #I’ve got some catching up to do

[paasrin]

ONLY YOU | Gavriel x reader x Fenrys

Summary: there wasn't a thing they earned till you enter in their lifes

Word count: 2070

Warning: teasing, pet names (sweetie, little one, honey...), PTSD

Advice: English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry for the spelling mistakes

It wasn't as if they hadn't had anything before you came, but the fact that it was too long ago. They had served Maeve for so long that she had forgotten what it was like to have something for them.

It had been strange to meet you, the daughter of the king of Adarlan, a human with raw magic, Dorian's twin and a person of very strong character, they definitely did not expect to have to share a partner, although they soon learned that the bond was not only from them to you , but it also happened between them, only it was something complicated with the war and everything that had to happen at that time.

You were not to think about anything other than Adarlan and feel guilty for abandoning him, as well as thinking that Rowan was a good man, or at least behaved well with Dorian. You were the flour of another costal. The rebellious daughter, the one who had received the necklace long before Dorian and didn't know how she stood up, the only one with enough willpower to take this and collapse afterwards, the one who had never gotten on very good terms with Aelin, just a hearty one

You didn't have much left behind the princess of the Valg, almost nothing. And suddenly both warriors came into your life, as if they had fallen from the sky to help you and that it was reciprocal, helping you when you needed it most, even if that meant having to be there for each other. It had taken you too long to accept that you were his mate, the person who was destined to find them and make the three of them have a good relationship.

Your magic hadn't served anyone present, for some reason I could never use it at will, like I was asleep, something strange knowing that there was no Valg or no tower to do that, it just burst sometimes, like when Maeve took Fenrys.

The pain you had felt had almost made you not want to have known him to not feel it, and even though you had Gavriel he was just like you, both trying to move forward with what was on them, a war and to find Aelin. You didn't give a shit about finding the queen of Terrasen, nothing at all, not because you didn't like her, you respected her and thought she was doing a good job, but your personalities clashed a lot and you were more attached to Fenrys than you want to admit. Seeing him almost die and accept the blood oath froze you, the blood, something inside your chest had disappeared that day, just as you had locked yourself up again, moving away from everyone, Gavriel and Fenrys the first. The journey had been tense with them, you even wished you had traveled with Dorian and the witches, or Chaol and Nesryn long ago.

It had been hard for Fenrys to return to a certain normality, and when he did, you were no longer whole enough to give him what he needed, and although you thought that it would help him, it only ended up doing more damage to the relationship you had between the three of you, because even if it was between two specific people, the third always won in this type of situation.

Aelin and Rowan had tried to talk to you about it, but you had actively and passively refused. However, before arriving at the port, both had cornered you to talk things over, calmly, but you were going through so much right now that you didn't care about them, you were selfish and you knew it perfectly.

Maybe that's why it was never a fucking option that you were queen, because your problems were always above those of others, and even though it made you feel bad for a few seconds, then you would look at what you suffered again and return to the same vicious circle over and over again time.

They both tried to help you and talk, however you didn't say a single word until you saw Dorian again, your twin would know what the hell to do. He was your fucking anchor in this world, one of the only two people you would put his problems above your own for.

“You have to do what is good for you, even if it is selfish, if what you really want and need is to get away from them, you should do it.” The main problem was that it was what you wanted and not what you needed, but you were not going to accept that out loud, pride was far above anything else in your life, or at least in the highest positions.

But you had almost died in that battle, and you hadn't cared much about dying, so you wouldn't have to deal with yourself anymore, with the shitty thoughts you had. And they had saved you, in every possible way a person could be saved. Fenrys and Gavriel helped you try to heal, not just physically but mentally, but the Orynth battle, almost losing Gavriel and the damage to Fenrys, feeling his pain from the bond, you didn't care at the time that you were healing. Something in you stirred and snapped, and the magic you had was suddenly free to use it. You didn't even think about it for a single second when you went to the battlefield, nor when a hunch led you to Elide, Dorian and Yrene, to see Erawan, just to see him and know what he did to you. They let you deal the last blow with no problem, the blow that left him in ashes, nothing, nothing left of him, however your magic wanted more, much more.

The next thing you remember was getting to Gavriel's side, on the stairs, and keeping him from dying, you didn't know what magic you were using, but you had made the heartbeat much stronger and made him live, he wasn't dead, and you could still feel him. Fenrys by the lasso, so it didn't even cross your mind that she might die, not now that her magic was free and she was sure she could try.

Aelin's coronation and the journey they all took together almost made her lose her mind, the pride in the eyes of Fenrys and Gavriel was something you would never forget.

You had had to say goodbye to your brother, because as much as you wanted to go back to Adarlan, back to your people, you had to learn to heal with Gavriel and Fenrys, you had to heal all three. Because ever since the war had ended, nightmares of Maeve's torture haunted Fenrys every night, nightmares of losing you haunted Gavriel, and just remembering everything you'd been through made you have horrible nightmares and panic attacks all over. the nights.

It was six months until you could say that things were working now, that there was no shame in anything that the two of you could do. Aelin was very grateful to make Fenrys happy, and Aedion had started to get along with her, not for nothing was he the person who was making her father better than her.

And now the three of them had moved to a house, far from the palace, in the forest of Oakwald, a place between Perranth, Rosamel and Caraverre. A home just for them, although they had practically not let her make a move, but she had openly told them to fuck off, making the fun of that night multiplied.

"What are you thinking, little one?" Gavriel's arms wrapped around his waist as his head rested on yours.

"Nothing."

"Liar" Fenrys barked with amusement appearing in her field of vision, a smile on his lips and some sweets in his hand.

He left them on the table in the living room to approach the two. First he gave you a sweet kiss and then he kissed Gavriel, for you it was not strange, they were a couple after all, just like you, the rest of the Cadre had had a hard time getting used to seeing two of their members not only as companions but in a polyamorous relationship.

"You never think about anything, you're always thinking about everything" Fenrys spoke, with his hands on your cheeks.

"What were you thinking, honey?" It was no longer a sweet tone, but a tone that promised many things if you did not answer the question truthfully.

You had never understood when they could read you with such ease, you were not bad at lying, in fact it was one of your best qualities, and now you were in these. The feeling of feeling loved no matter what was foreign to you, Dorian was the only one who had managed to make you feel one hundred percent comfortable, Chaol almost one hundred percent, and Gavriel and Fenrys, whom you had known for a few months, It hadn't cost them anything to get into your life and understand and love you, no matter what.

And there you were, in the arms of two of the people you loved most in the world, with a home, a life and in peace. The love between the three of you went further than you could really even understand, the way you wanted to think of everything was incredible. And that you were not convinced at first when you stayed in Terrasen with them.v"In everything we've been through to get here, in how my life went to shit because of a fucking Valg and I had to live with a lot of shit after that" totally sincere, he had omitted the part where he wanted them with all his soul, but they knew it, you had told them on several occasions.

"And?" You frowned.

"Like what? What more do you want?" You asked in confusion.

"You've been out of your mind for several minutes, you can't tell me there's no more" you rolled your eyes when Fenrys started laughing, pinching him, getting him to get annoyed enough to complain, although in your eyes Fenrys was a dramatic, it was your dramatic, your dramatic.

From Gavriel and you, from no one else.

"Details about that, there hasn't been much else, nothing important" you spoke dismissively.

"Yeah," Fenrys sneered, "and I don't have a fetish for seeing you in subspace," he stated.

"We have, because I'm seriously thinking of leaving you like this every day" he murmured and looked at Fenrys, leaving you aside "how would you like it?"

Fenrys gave you a quick glance, you looked so small between their bodies.

"You would look fucking sexy, sweetie."

And you wouldn't mind the hell they both did to you, because you knew it wouldn't be anything you couldn't take, you knew it was normal for you, that they would never hurt you.

Because only they made you feel as if they were taking you to the stars, they didn't make you see them, they took you to them, looking for the same from you, and surprisingly you hadn't had any problem with it at all. "Or how good she would look tied up, while you play with her and I devour her" the three of you knew that by devouring you he didn't mean the mouth, Fenrys had a problem with your intimate area, a very big one, because he loved devouring you as if there would be no tomorrow and he would not have eaten in his damn existence.

"I'd even let you choose the scent of the candles" Gavriel murmured placing a kiss on your neck, soft, like a promise, Fenrys kissed you on the lips, sealing whatever this was.

"What a tempting offer" you purred, and then you looked into those black eyes that drove you crazy, as if you hadn't seen them in your whole damn existence, then you turned to Gavriel's, so wild, you were crazy about the contrast of the color of their eyes, all of them drove you crazy and you loved that.

"Decide quickly, because the offer won't be available much longer, not in a nice way," Gavriel reasoned.

"Only you can make that idea sound tempting" you snorted "there is no one in this existence who can say that without sounding crazy" you spoke.

"Only we are going to be able to taste you this way, forever and ever" Fenrys murmured.

For you immortality would be something they would give without a second thought, although they would prefer to find a way for you to live much longer with it, although they understood the point of not wanting to leave your twin.

Only they made you feel this good, and you were no longer afraid to say so.

#fenrys moonbeam #gavriel x reader x fenrys #throne of glass #gavriel x reader #gavriel #fenrys moonbeam x reader #poly relationship

[nikethestatue]

I remember an article gassing her up and saying ACOTAR might be as successful as GoT lmao and if I remember correctly then ToG was picked up too for a TV adaptation but then nothing happened.

I think acotar is more a cw show yk? like it could've been the new vampire diaries but TV has changed so much in the last decade. These days unless a show is an instant hit production just won't spend anytime on it. Also, SJM, I think made it too difficult for others to work with her. None of the recent book to screen adaptations have been 100% book accurate, they make huge changes to adapt the material to the screen. I mean look at Shadow and Bone. They basically changed everything including the main couple while Leigh just had to take a backseat and let them do their own thing. And even then the show for cancelled after s2. I don't think SJM would be able to do that. I think she wanted to be too involved in everything and didn't let anyone make any change and it probably turned too ugly and hard to work with her. SJM feels like someone with too much ego. She's in her downfall era I guess.

Yes, that's what everyone said--she was too combative, too involved, arguing and contradicting everyone every step of the way.

But I also think--did she rewrite HOFAS BECAUSE of the show? Like if the crossover was much bigger and touched upon things that were detrimental to Prythian's storylines, then how would it be filmed?

I dont know. I am also violently against any show/movie being created before the series is finished. The you get the mess that was GOT in the last season.

Finally, i think TOG is a better series for adaptation--it's more interesting, it has Abraxos and a bunch of fun creatures, it has Manon and the witches, and it has side love stories--Elorcan, Chaol and Yrene. I think ACOTAR is very linear and has a few too few characters.

So basically, the gal shot herself in the foot. Oh well. Pride before the Fall, right?

[starlightbooklove]

Let's talk about Nesta Archeron and ACOSF

Pt 1,

Something that I have always been in Acotar is half Nesta, that is, neither pro nor con, because she is a character that I cannot completely love and at the same time I cannot completely hate.

I just like her.

Nesta was a bitch, to her sister, to her father (With reason to do so in his case) and to everyone in general, she was unbearable to me and I remember that the first time I read Acosf I didn't understand anything and I was very conflicted about how to feel about her more than anything.

It was after I reread that I formed a clearer idea and that is that SJM fell short with her, her redemption arc was nice, but it could have been much more, (It needed to be more)

And funny enough is that even some of her stans agree with this (There are too many ACOSF fics).

And the funniest thing is that she has already done it, Chaol's book made me completely change the way I see him to the point that in my opinion he is the most developed male character in TOG together with Dorian, because he really seeks to fix things with those he feels and knows he did wrong, while with Nesta..., there was sex, a lot of sex, sometimes too much sex, and her arc was lost.

(And no, I'm not forgetting the training or the book itself).

Now, Having said that, I can emphasize good things that were done with his character, beyond the fact that she saved feysand lmao, that's the main thing, second to her representation of depression and the self-deprecating thoughts she had about herself, hit hard 🥲, because it does happen, and her trauma around being all cold and mean to defend herself after almost being abused, The whole thing about the cauldron and, on top of that, the death of her father, was something very well constructed, and her shitty attitude is good in the sense that it goes with a character in that state, how many times have I seen characters That are like this because simply what they have been through has made them sour? A lot, But on her, who already had a shitty life being a shitty sister, it didn't look good, because throughout the whole process, even when she tells herself that she doesn't want to be like that, SHE IS A BITCH, You can't fucking deny that.

The book itself is contradictory because it takes to the extreme 'what I want to do and I think about it but I don't do it', that doesn't happen like that all the time, many times, if you want to change, you grab your balls and you're a damn good person because you want to improve, even when it means leaving your comfort zone, Nesta came to that point very late in the book, her attitude is not simply dry, it's downright hostile, and many people confuse that.

Hostile and dry are not the same, Manon for example, is dry with those who love her, but not hostile (all the time), that is why she is such a beloved character. Rowan, at first is hostile but then he's just Rustic and that's it, because it's his way of shielding himself. Shit, Even Feyre becomes dry (and confused with hostile a lot by some fans) the first time she visits Velaris, (with all reason) but again, to shield herself, and this does not take away the affection for the character because we can empathize And understand why.

With Nesta, we understand why and we don't understand why at the same time, and that in a way, is the point, hurt people hurt people, but why did SJM take her so far if she wanted to give her an arc of redemption? And if she took it that far then why she didn't really make her go through her steps and try to fix her mess?

A character that grows is the one who is self-aware of what she did and does something about it, something for real, and the book end just when she was starting LMAO.

Now, it may be that the intention is that all of that was the journey and the end of the book was the beginning of her "i'm gonna try" era, which would make sense, but 😬 idk, i hold on to that. The book is good, and they empower her quite a bit, and that, taking away everything else, makes her a pretty good character, which is what her fans praise about her book, but I definitely think it could have been better.

I will touch more on the topic in depth.

There is a second part 😉.

#acosf #nesta archeron #pro nesta #anti nesta #sarah j maas #sjmaas #acotar

[lovinpages]

SPOILERS FOR THRONE OF GLASS (and Crescent City a bit too)!

I finished KOA. How do I even move on from this series now 😭

I absolutely can’t stop thinking about it! Rowan and Fenrys omg but all the men are amazing in this series. Yes, even Chaol in the last two books. But Rowan my goodness a new bookboyfriend for sure 😂

So here comes a dump of my thoughts on the last book.

- The first part of the book was the most intens for me. And the best part of the book too.

- I can’t stop thinking about how Fenrys and Aelin had this communication blinking thing I absolutely loved that! How she escaped and the first thing she did was go to Fenrys. But my god he couldn’t do anything for Aelin in there and still they found a way to be together, even though the pain they both had to go through. How he cried when he had to take the glass out of her legs… 😭

- I loved how she couldn’t really talk or touch Rowan after the escape. But when she had the chance, she went looking for wedding rings. It was such a beautiful moment.

- Rowan did everything he could for Aelin. How broken he was when she was with Maeve. Just how his pov was about her, it was all so amazing. His pov was my absolute favorite thing of the entire series. He would do anything to get to her, even if it would hurt him. Like cutting himself in his shoulder to get that piece of iron out, to get to her. It blew my mind. Not even sure how to describe it all. He is amazing in every way possible.

- Also it kinda bothered me how Aelin wouldn’t let Dorian help her. She never planned doing it together, she would safe him at that Lock even though they decided to do it together. She would just do everything alone, only sacrifice herself. It got irritating at some point. Aelin didn’t even think about what Rowan would have to go through if she actually died. Yes she would safe the world. But it felt like she only cared about that, about wanting the war to end. Rowan lost a ‘mate’ before. And if she would die, like she planned several times, he would have to live without her. He would do anything to solve it, so she wouldn’t have to die, but she only thought about ‘it was her fate’. Come on Aelin, think about the pain Rowan would have to go through?! It broke my heart when she just went in that Lock and Rowan could do nothing but just stand there and watch. HE HAD TO WATCH. How could she do it to him, just sacrificing herself and if it wasn’t for the Lock, it would be to kill Maeve. She knew she would die, and I can’t believe the pain Rowan would have to go through. She didn’t even let him talk or try to solve it so she wouldn’t have to. I don’t know what it was, but it irritated me.

- I never thought it would hurt so much that the thirteen died. What it did to Manon. 😭

- And how hard it was for Aedion that his father died. He would’t really talk to him, didn’t even want to be near him at first. But in the end he cared about him so so so much. I still don’t really get why SJM needed to kill him…?! It happened so fast and it wasn’t like he needed to sacrifice himself at that point?! The thirteen, they had no choice, if they didn’t sacrifice, everyone would die. But Gavriel, he just went through the gate, it closed, and he killed a bunch of Valg. But there were so much more Valg left, what was the point of going through that gate?! It felt as such an easy way to kill him, not needed at all. 😭

- And Connall. I wish we learned more about him. What happened in that throne room with Maeve, who Connall was to Fenrys (except his twin brother, that was clear).

- With this many pov’s, it would’ve been so much better for me if it was devided into two books. I wish we got more time with each couple. Elide and Lorcan, Aedion and Lysandra. I wanted to learn so much more about them together. I read that they’re both mates. But I didn’t really read that in the books. Not only do I want to know what Lorcan did with Elide OMG. But also Lysandra and Aedion. It was detailed at some points, but in the end it felt rushed and absolutely not complete, even though they got married. Talking about getting married. WHY DID SJM WRITE ALMOST NONE OF THE WEDDING SCENES. I wanted to read those sooo bad!

- It also felt so rushed when Aedion did the blood oath. It was so important to him and yes he was crying through the entire process (omg 😭) but still I wish they would talk about it so much more, make it much bigger than it was now.

- I just wished the book would’ve had more moments of calm with the characters. Not even sexy times. Of course I wouldn’t mind though 😏 but just talking with each other. Not talking about the war, but personal talks. Getting to know each other and telling secrets, spending time together. Sometimes it felt like we were going from one battlefield to the other. And planning, planning and even more planning. It got frustrating at some point which is sad because all SJM books are absolutely 5+ stars to me. And some books feel like they deserve like 18 stars but this one… I did rate it with 5 stars. But that was mostly for the first part of the book. Even though we get most answers, for such a complicated story, with so many pov’s and details, it’s still incomplete. Please please pleaaase let there be more. Crescent City 3 please?! With Rowan pov as well please?!?!

- Crescent city must be a book of at least 2000 pages my goodness how is she gonna bring everything together with so many amazing stories?!

- But okay about tog: I still don’t really get what Maeve wanted. Yes she wanted the keys but why? And what does it mean that she’s a Valg queen? Was she possessed by a Valg? Was there a person before the Valg? Where did she come from, who was she? Or was she and Erawan and his brothers a Valg in the other worlds, and was there never a person to begin with? I still don’t get it. And the gods too, I don’t understand it all. It was such a complicated story. Amazing, but complicated. And how that all ended… it just didn’t feel as strong as the rest of the story.

- Also. If that Lock was made to lock Erawan. Why didn’t they lock them in there. Why did he had to be killed, what was so important that someone from Mala’s family had to die, and in the end not even locking Erawan with it, but needed to kill him? The gods had to be locked… but the story was about Erawan who was locked when Evalin (or what was her name?) made that mistake. That also was a bit weird to me. Only because of a mistake, the whole world was in danger, only to safe her mate? And now Aelin can’t be safed for her mate? That whole Lock part was so confusing in this last book. I still don’t really get it, and it feels incomplete somehow. What happened exactly, why were Erawan and Maeve in this world, why did they create the Valg, who were they, where did they come from, why did they need to be locked, where did that portal came from in the first place, how did they get in this world? What are their exact powers? What did the gods do, where did they come from, why couldn’t they help and safe them? I do believe I just missed some things in the book, I mean it’s so complex and so much. But still, I missed something in this entire story.

I loved the entire series. It was such a strong story. But the ending of it all, it wasn’t what I expected. It wasn’t a bad ending, it was written well, and I can’t really tell why it feels incomplete, rushed, as if it’s missing information. I love everything that Sarah writes. Absolutely everything. But a complex and strong story like this one needs an incredible ending, which it just wasn’t to me. This book was the least of the entire series somehow. And that makes me a little sad. I loved that series so much. I started caring about everything so much.

I have to mention that I read KOA in two days though 😂 which is a LOT of information in two days hahahah so yeah I definitely need to reread them and see what I missed the first time. Sometimes I just read stuff online and I’m like omg was that even said in the book?!

Okay for now this is it. Applause to everyone who made it to the end of my ToG feelings dump 😂 I’m sure there will be more soon 🤣

#tog #rowan #aelin #koa #kingdom of ash #sjm books #sjmaas #sjm multiverse #aedion ashryver #lorcan salvaterre #elide lochan #chaol westfall #yrene towers #aelin ashryver galathynius #dorian havilliard #rowan whitethorn

[galaxyofstars]

thank you to everyone who sees my absolutely hypocritical posting history and simply scrolls by. sorry to everyone who thinks ah yes she dislikes what i dislike about that work and then sees me simping over a characters fanart (pls know that chaol is not included in that statement). also sorry to everyone who goes 'oh yay she loves this thing too' and then sees me posting about how i think certain characters have a stick up their ass and should should actually just shut the fuck up. i have complex evolve opinions (i have never made a decision in my life without a hard deadline and literal weeks of agonising over it beforehand)

#indeciveness #acotar #sjm #tog #anti choal westfall #no im not biased at all why do you ask? #books