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nahimjustfeelingit-writes · 4 years

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Trois.

A preview

This is a new fic mini series that I will be starting soon and I want to give you ladies the back story of the characters to see how you ladies feel about it.

Bisa Kimathi

Bisa Kimathi was born and raised in North Carolina and her parents are from Ghana. Her father is a MRI Technologist and her mother is a Nurse. Bisa was a sex worker turned good girl who used her smarts to land her in the city of the angels. She had just graduated from Bennett College for women in which she had concurrently attended North Carolina A&T to complete her dual degree in Chemical Engineering and Africana Women's Studies. After obtaining her dual degree, Bisa decided to move to Los Angeles for a fresh start. She did a virtual three-process interview with an entry level full-time Chemical Engineering position in Los Angeles. She also had her own blog where she discussed black women’s rights and African American women violence and biases against them.

Bisa has been single for quite some time, almost a year. Bisa had a few boyfriends and none of them worked out. She was a phone sex operator who did verbal role play and she also did solo cam sex with her identity hidden. All of this occurred when she was going to school to pay her way through college. Bisa felt that she suffered from hypersexuality so instead of fucking around with multiple men she took up sex work to feed her recurring sexual fantasies and urges. When she moved to Los Angeles she swore she would focus on her career and getting settled in, that was until she decided to go to a sketchy bar in Chesterfield Square.

Erik Stevens

Erik Stevens is an Entrepreneur of a fitness company called Elite Body Edge. He was born and raised in South Central to a two parent home. Both of his parents were activists in the black community and they frequently spoke out about police brutality. During the LA riots back in 1992, Erik’s father was murdered after shielding Erik from a drive by shooting since the crime rate had increased along with the looting and rioting happening. His father was an idol to him, he grew up becoming an activist himself with a bachelor’s degree in Biological Science and a master’s degree in Business Administration and Management at Berkeley.

Erik realized his attraction to both men and women since he was eighteen years old. His first real relationship was with a guy who was a new friend and college roommate of his at Berkeley. He was more so known for sleeping around with women up until he had sex with his roommate. Erik kept his relationship with his roommate a secret for at least a year up until he decided to come out as bisexual at the end of his sophomore year of college. Erik is a very sexual person who doesn’t prefer one sex over the other. He loves both men and women equally. Recently, Erik had his eyes on an underground boxer that he ran into at Comic-Con a month ago. He visited his fights so he could watch him in action, dreaming of a chance with him.

Adonis Johnson

Adonis Johnson is a college graduate earning a bachelor’s degree in accounting. He works as a securities firm at Smith Boardley Financial Group. Adonis was a troubled youth who was in and out of detention centers and he also grew up in foster care. He didn’t know who his father was and his mother had passed away when he was around four. Mary Anne Creed, Apollo Creed’s widow, meets with Adonis and adopts him; informing him that he is Apollo Creed’s son. Adonis does underground boxing on the side more so for the thrill than to become a pro boxer some day. Hands of steel, Adonis loves to fight dirty. Adonis always had trouble with relationships with women. It was always platonic love between the opposite sex except for a long term relationship he had with a woman named Bianca

After that relationship ended, Adonis was left unsatisfied and seeking something new. He wasn’t always curious about sex with a man, never really even seen a guy naked, let alone think of having sex with one. He wondered what he did to make them think he would be interested. A few guys he knew that were underground boxers would make passes at him, assuming him gay or bisexual but Adonis grew defensive and ended up in physical altercations with them. This in turn made him curious. What if I let him suck my dick? why do I keep thinking about it? He would think. It wasn’t until he ran into a guy named Erik at Comic-Con. Adonis felt butterflies in his stomach, his heart beat a little faster. Adonis was attracted to this guy and he could see Erik felt it too but neither of them said anything and as fate would have it, it wouldn’t be the last time they saw each other.

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#nahimjustfeelingit-writes #killmonger imagine #creedimagine #adonis x oc #killmonger x oc #killmonger smut #creedsmut #creed ii #adonis creed #erik killmonger

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #401

“my love is just waiting to turn your tears to roses”

Do you typically do your makeup the same each time? Or do you like to change it up often? IF I wear makeup, it's essentially always the same. Who is the last person you were in a room with just the two of you? What were you doing? Yesterday with Mom. We were trying to find the best deal on Eco Earth, a substrate we're getting for Venus. What was the last really good book you read, and what was it about? If we're talking REALLY good book, then The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. In short summary, it's a dystopian future novel where women are now basically just objects used only for repopulation, even having their names stripped from them. They follow very strict rules as society has returned to horrible misogyny. As a woman, the "oh my god, this is possible" aspect of it is terrifying, and it causes such a sense of disgust and urge to ensure women rights always continue to be fought for. Do you feel safe in your country? For the most part, I'd say. I guess. There are places I'd feel safer, though. How many meals do you eat a day? Three. Have you ever performed a solo dance in front of a crowd? No, but I was supposed to my senior year in high school; the seniors at my dance studio were always welcome to do a solo in celebration. Mine was a modern dance to "Coma White" by Marilyn Manson, wanting to tell a story about depression and how being medicated could feel, but I eventually decided like halfway through learning the choreography that I was just too nervous to do a solo. Have you ever sung a solo? No. When you go to McDonalds, what drink do you usually get? Coke. Have you ever had to call and complain about a product you bought? No. Do you own a designer purse? Definitely not. I'm not wasting that much money on something like that. What’s the weirdest rumor you’ve ever heard about yourself? Apparently, Jason and I had a baby in high school even though I was obviously never pregnant. To my knowledge, it was started by his ex. Who is now a good friend of mine lmaooo. Life is funny. What was your favorite Saturday morning cartoon growing up? Pokemon, of course. Would you ever have an affair? Nope. Would you ever have a one night stand? Nope. Where you present at any major historical events (e.g. 9/11)? No. What are your opinions on marijuana legalization? Legalize it, but treat it similarly to alcohol in that driving under the influence is illegal and punishable, and I believe you should be of a certain age. How about abortion? I am pro-choice. I was pro-life most of my own life, but now I am very firm about a mother being able to choose if she wants to endure a pregnancy or not. Like, that is a MASSIVE life event that almost inevitably changes - and sometimes traumatizes - people. I do believe a fetus is its own body and not part of the mother's, but rather in the mother's, but the belief that a woman decides what she wants in her body is her choice, too. I'm not very fond of people treating abortion as a simple, regular form of birth control, like it's nothing but an "lol whoops," but I still believe it is ultimately her decision, and she should always be free of judgment for doing what is best for her. Do you wear skirts or dresses more often? Neither. I wouldn't dare wear a skirt more so, though. What do you think about tipping at restaurants? There should always be an expected minimum, imo, unless the person was truly, sincerely, genuinely fucking awful. Waiters do not have an easy job, fight me about it, and they're just trying to survive while putting on a happy, jovial face, all the while dealing with hungry people who can be such assholes. I believe the actual tip should relate to actual service, but again, give them something. Would you ever get back together with any of your exes? One, absolutely. The other would take a shitload of consideration and proper communication on his part. Do you have a preferred coffee brand? No, because I don't like coffee. Do you usually befriend your coworkers, or do you prefer to keep work separate from your personal life? IF I had a job, I'd like to build a friendship with those I have to engage with almost every day. What is something you frequently forget? Dates, ages, names, what I was about to do five seconds before I forgot... Pretty much everything. My memory is frightfully poor. Is there any drama currently going on with your family? No. When you take a nap, do you nap in bed or on the couch? In my bed. Were you raised by both of your parents? If not, then who raised you? Both; my parents split when I was somewhere around 17, though, but I'd say there wasn't much more "raising" to do at that age. Have you ever stolen anything? If so, why? No. Have you ever plagiarized someone else's work? Hell no. What's your most-used mode of transportation? My mom's car. Have you ever taught someone else a useful skill? Not to my recollection. Does seeing everyone else's 'perfect lives' posted on social media ever bring you down or affect how you feel about yourself? It actually does, honestly. Not ALWAYS, but if I'm being honest, it does most of the time. I've contemplated deleting Facebook for that reason, but with is also comes things that make me happy, and I think I'd feel even more isolated without it. What is your favorite Hostess/Little Debbie snack? This is SO impossible for me to answer. I loooove Hostess and Little Debbie treats. I want to say honeybuns, but I also love those chocolate cupcakes with the white swirls on top, as well as Twinkies. Very few exist that I don't like. Do you/your family buy loafs from the bakery or bagged on the shelf? We just buy bagged bread. What’s the best news you’ve gotten lately? My APAP mask is definitively WORKING!!!!! :') Mom got an app that connects to the machine via Bluetooth that monitors the effectiveness of the mask, evaluating many factors of your sleep, and it's detecting a definite decrease in disruptive behaviors or something like that. It is so, SO encouraging to know that. ^And, the worst? Hm. Oh, probably some news on something serious a good friend is going through, but I don't feel it's my right to disclose what. It's just a very worrying and potentially dangerous issue that I wish I could help her with. Would you rather receive (or give) flowers, chocolates or jewelry? I'd appreciate any, but my fat ass is drawn to the chocolate, ha ha. What *I* would give would vary depending on what the person liked. How do you feel about coconut? Smells lovely, but is otherwise gross. ^ Ever cracked one open? No, but omg I've always wanted to, haha. What’s the best thing about being your gender? I guess the fact it's more "normal" and "accepted" to show our emotions. Fuck that generalization, though. I don't give a shit what your gender is, you experiencing emotions is NORMAL and welcomed to be expressed. ^ And the worst thing? The ability to be raped and impregnated by it. Do you do your part to save the earth? I don't do nearly enough. :/ We recycle, but that's about it. Well, none of us DARE to litter either, but I still don't feel like it's as much as the earth deserves from its denizens. Who do you think should have their portrait on a bill? I don't know or care. Why did you last feel exhausted? Yesterday was my niece's birthday, and I spent essentially ALL day playing with her and her brother. I have a very limited battery when it comes to kids, and I was running on empty for hours. My anxiety was SO high and I really needed a break from them, but they're too young to really understand that Aunt Britt can only socially run for so long before I'm completely burnt out, and TRUST ME, I was there for sure. I didn't want them to think they did something wrong, you know? I just had to keep going. I slept like a baby last night though for sure, haha. Have you ever used emotional blackmail to get your own way? Wow, no. Has anybody ever used emotional blackmail on you? No. Who did you last worry about and why? Sara for health reasons. Are you currently looking for a new place to live? Not actively, but Mom and I definitely want to move. We feel very out-of-place here in the suburbs. Which would you prefer as a view; mountains or the sea? Mountains. Do you have a mouse for your laptop? (Assuming you have a laptop) Yes. I canNOT play games with a trackpad. Do you apologize a lot? Extremely excessively. When you get married what do you think you’ll put most of your focus and money into? Do you mean like, for the wedding? In that case, probably the venue. Being a photography buff, I want a place I think is really pretty to have pictures taken. What’s something you complain about frequently? My legs hurting, my weight, and being hot. Do you have anything planned for the summer? Nope, and that's fine with me. I'd rather stay inside away from the heat. Who usually makes dinner in your household? My ma. Do you have a blog? Just on Tumblr. Does anyone in your family snore loudly? My mother does because of gerd, and at least when my father still lived with us, he snored super loud, too. Do you want to fix anything with anyone? Yeah, a few people. What shows do you watch? Right now, only Meerkat Manor: Rise of the Dynasty. Whenever The Edge of Sleep comes out, I will 110% be watching that, too, because Mark is a key actor in it. :') Plus the concept seems super cool. Have you ever broken someone’s heart? I don't know. Who was the last person you had a conversation with on the phone? Me mum. Does the song you’re currently listening to remind you of anyone specific? No, given it has like... one lyric, haha. Do you own any TV show soundtracks? No. Last thing you did that made you feel like an adult? I mean I guess sign myself in at the doctor's. What’s your favorite picture of your mom? Dad? Oh my god, there's a candid one I got of Mom laughing when she was posing as my subject for a photography assignment, and I cherish it with ALL my heart. I want to share it with essentially the whole world, but yeah, I'm not gonna put my mom's picture here. As for my dad, I like this one I took of us at Red Lobster for his birthday a year or two back. Last TV show series you finished? Fullmetal Alchemist with Sara. Favorite flavor of cream cheese? Regular. What US state would you like to visit? Alaska. Last meal you made yourself? I put a chicken pesto thing in the microwave earlier for dinner.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''whispers in the dark'' by skillet

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taiblogcomics · 4 years

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Absolutely Thera-Pissed

Hey there, visas and green cards. It's our ninth blogaversary! Wow, we've been going for quite a long time. Long enough to completely change platforms at least once. Considering we just finished our whole backlog, I think we should try something new in honour of the amazing coincidence of these two events synching up. Before we start on another backlog of terrible comics (trust me, I have something in mind), let's do something we've never done before on this blog. We've only ever really covered comics issue by issue. How would you feel, dear readers, if we instead did an entire storyline all at once?

And oh boy, do I have just the storyline in mind. Here's the cover:

Oh yeah. We're doing this. This story has kind of hung over this blog, mostly due to its connections to Red Hood and the Outlaws. It also prominitely features Harley Quinn, who also appeared in Suicide Squad (which ended before this story took place). And personally, I am a fan of Harley, Booster, and the Titans. And oh boy, does this comic shit all over them, in some of the most truly appalling ways possible. This is Heroes in Crisis. All nine issues. Let's jump right in~

I won’t be going over the covers of the individual issues, or even this one so much, but I do like that quote at the top. It is actually some good superhero artwork! It is an extremely awful story, but the artwork is fine~

So the first issue starts like this: Booster Gold's in one of those tiny middle-American diners. The host's loving it, since she says superheroes never show up and eat here. And oh look, here comes another one! Booster replies that that's no hero, as Harley Quinn walks in. Clearly he hasn't been reading her solo series. Harley orders some pie, and she and Booster eat in terse silence. Until suddenly Harley grabs a knife, and the two begin a real knock-down, drag-out fight. And lemme tell ya something, Harley keeps up with a guy who can fly and project forcefields pretty well. Eventually the pair are exhausted, and Booster says he's gotta bring Harley in, after what he saw her do. Harley protests, because she didn't kill all those people. She saw Booster do it.

All this is intercut with two different scenes. One is sort of a confession-cam style thing, a bunch of heroes (including Harley, Blue Jay, Booster, and Hotspot) all admitting they're here for therapy. And the second is Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman talking with each other as they land in a particular site. This place is called Sanctuary. It is currently full of dead heroes. Among the deceased here are Hotspot, Lagoon Boy, Wally West, and Roy Harper. And this is my first major complaint. Do you know what all these characters have in common? Hey, DC: Stop using the Titans as your cannon fodder. Stop treating them as a joke. Every iteration of the team deserves more respect than this.

So Harley and Booster are going to be our POV characters for this story. I like both of these characters a lot, so this is probably going to be pretty painful seeing them written horribly. Harley goes off to the Penguin for protection, and we actually get to see her in her old costume. It is a breath of fresh air, honestly. Booster, meanwhile, mostly just tries to rationalise his actions with Skeets, his robot buddy. Booster suffered kind of a psychotic break back in the Batman storyline "The Gift", which is why he was in Sanctuary to begin with. This story is basically a follow-up to that one, and has the same sort of tone.

Harley confronts the trinity in Gotham, revealing she set the whole thing up with Penguin just so she could get close to them on her terms. She uses the Lasso of Truth to confess she saw Booster Gold do it, then uses the Kryptonite in Batman's belt to skip town. The next time we see her, she's at the docks, giving a eulogy to Poison Ivy, another victim of Sanctuary. Booster Gold, meanwhile, has rationalised that Batman would solve the crime himself rather than turn himself in, and goes to Barry Allen to check in. Of course, the trinity are the only ones who know about the accident yet, so when Booster tells Barry that Wally's dead, he gets super pissed. Just like the readers are!

Issue 3 is a flashback issue, showing Booster's first day at Sanctuary. Sanctuary works like this: everyone gets their own private quarters, and if they want to visit the common areas, they wear a mask and cloak to preserve anonymity. Here's the first really big problem with Sanctuary: while therapy for superheroes is a good (possibly necessary) concept, Sanctuary is only one kind of therapy. It essentially assumes everyone responds the same to the same sort of therapy. The kind here is that Sanctuary gives you a private room that simulates your traumas (with a holodeck) and has you physically confront them. Lagoon Boy, for example, is shown to be facing the laser that killed him over and over again. Wally sets up superhero battles that still have his kids with him. And while this sort of therapy might help some people, it's definitely not universal.

Booster starts his first session, which ends up just being a hologram of himself, talking to him. Before he can get much further, though, alarms go off and everyone is urged to emergency evacuate. Lagoon Boy is killed--in a deliberate callback to his previous death, no less--and we see a few other victims, including Red Devil, Commander Steel, and Gunfire. Wally clutches Roy's body as he dies in his arms, and Harley smacks Wally in the face with her hammer. She greets Booster cheerfully, and he admits he's having a hell of a first day.

After a brief scene of Aqualad (Garth, in this case) drinking in a bar--and who can blame him for wanting to drink after experiencing this story?--Batman and Barry meet, thus showing they're still unsure who did it. Booster is being interrogated under the Lasso of Truth, and he relays the previous issue to us. In his mind, Harley did it. Harley, meanwhile, has tracked down Batgirl (Barbara Gordon) and surprisingly... they hug. Babs promises to help stick by Harley and prove her innocence. After all, Babs has been through trauma, too. The comic reminds us of this with another confession-cam video, showing Babs display the scars she received from “The Killing Joke".

So, about these confession cams... They've been interspersed between scenes, showing everyone from Batman down to guys like Gunfire or the Protector relaying their problems by confession. Again, this sort of therapy isn't for everyone, but it's the only one Sanctuary's got. Superman tells Batman that Lois has been receiving these videos anonymously. Batman responds that there are no videos. Sanctuary does not keep records, to preserve patient confidentiality. Supes replies that there are videos, he's seen them, and now the media has them. The issue ends with a breaking story about "What is the secret superhero Sanctuary?" exposé airing on television...

Speaking of breaking, Blue Beetle (Ted Kord, who I'm as surprised as anybody to find out is alive again post-Rebirth) breaks Booster out of the Hall of Justice where he's being held. The pair watch the breaking news report on television while they try to come up with a plan. Booster's idea is to confess to Barry again, figuring they won't expect the stupidest possible move, making it actually the smartest possible move. Booster has not really recovered from his insanity, I see. He and Beetle do exactly that, surprising Barry at work, which is apparently all the advantage they need. This is because Barry, as a forensic scientist, has access to the data on the autopsies.

While Superman makes a public statement to the press regarding Sanctuary, Batman passes Skeets into Batgirl's care, and she immediately violates that trust by in turn passing Skeets to Harley. It's implied Harley tortures the information regarding Booster's whereabouts out of Skeets, but it's okay because he's just a robot. Babs and Harley turn up at Booster's place as he's analysing the data he obtained from Barry. Here's where it all starts to fall into place: the data on Wally West says his body is five days older than the rest of them.

Issue 6 is kind of a triple piece, but one that can be summed up fairly quickly. It focuses on three specific characters who were all at Sanctuary. The parts regarding Gnaark the caveman (another Titans alumnus) are ultimately pointless, since the issue ends with his death. The parts with Harley focus on Joker's abuse of her and Posion Ivy's care towards her. This also ends badly. Wally's parts focus on the DC Rebirth story where he essentially willed himself back into the universe. And while that story is really good and it was a joy to see Wally again, it ultimately ended with the knowledge that Wally's family did not reappear with him. His kids are gone, his wife is with someone else and does not remember him, and until he forced his way back into everyone's memories, no one else recalled him either. This would traumatise anybody. But it may have really traumatised Wally.

The next issue starts really well, honestly. Booster and Harley are fighting it out--again--while Babs and Beetle just watch. Like, they aren't even stressed, they're both familiar with their respective charges, and this is really no surprise. In any other comic, this would be a great scene. Shame that it's in this one, and it's not nearly enough to save even a lick of it. Eventually Babs works out that Booster's forcefields are only currently working because of some jury-rigged tech that's powered by Blue Beetle's consciousness. So she knocks him out with one hit. Harley prepares a killing blow, but ultimately cannot go through with it, proving she's a good person. She and Booster just collapse on the floor, and bond over the fact that they both kind of suck as superheroes (from their own perspectives, at least).

With Booster, Beetle, Babs, and Harley (Barley?) all on the same side now, the group decide to get to the bottom of everything together. Meanwhile, the rose Harley dropped off the docks is picked up by Wally. See, while the body they found of Wally is five days older than the rest, this means he time-traveled and is still at present alive. Wally channels his Speed Force into the rose, causing it to grow rapidly--and Poison Ivy blooms from it, restored to life. I don't get it either, but if it means Ivy didn't die in this stupid story, I'll take it. Wally then apologises, since Ivy just returned to life and now she has to see death so soon. Those five days are up, and a second Wally appears, ready to literally kill himself.

So here's what really fucking happened.

Wally had been at Sanctuary three weeks already. He's frustrated because the therapy's not helping as fast as he thought it would. He does a jump into the Speed Force and basically exists everywhere at once. Spread across the time stream, he witnesses everybody's confession cams all at once. He sees "the trauma of a thousand heroes in crisis" (hey, we have a title, ladies and gentlemen). And... it's too much. Realising everybody's personal pain breaks him. He unleashes the burst of pent-up energy he'd stored to do the time jaunt thing and kills everyone at Sanctuary.

Lagoon Boy. Protector. Hotspot. Red Devil. Arsenal. Gnaark. Solstice. Tattooed Man. Gunfire. Blue Jay. Commander Steel. Nemesis. I want you to remember these names. These were all pre-existing characters. Half of them were members of the Titans at one point or another. Wally West, the Flash, killed them in a stupid, stupid storyline that not only assassinates his character, but also literally assassinates all these other characters.

Wally uses his super speed to set up the bodies, rig the crime scenes so it looks like Harley or Booster could be responsible for their deaths. He then travels forward in time to the present moment, where he has just confessed all this to Poison Ivy. He kills that version of himself and travels back in time with it to fake his own death. He then uses the VR tech of Sanctuary to trick Booster and Harley into believing they saw the other commit the deeds. Neither of them even knew they'd never left their respective therapy simulations. This leaves Wally with a five day window to figure out something good he can do to make up for killing everyone.

So the final issue wraps it up like this: Booster time-travels the group back to where Barry is about to kill his own paradox clone. Harley and Ivy reunite, which is nice. So here's the plan: this doesn't have to end with any more death. In the end, what Barry did was all an accident. So Booster travels into the future to make a clone of the paradox-Wally. This gives them a five-day-old body they can leave at the massacre, in order to close the timeloop. The present Wally turns himself in and is arrested, while the five-days-ago paradox Wally merges back into the Speed Force, still running to try and find his family.

And the "good" thing Wally did to make up for killing everyone? He was the one that leaked Sanctuary's existence to the media. In his mind, the idea that heroes are seen as constant paragons was too much pressure. By letting the public know that even superheroes need therapy, even superheroes suffer trauma just like everyone else, he he could let people know that heroes are just that: people. People like everyone else. And that it is okay for anyone to seek help if you need it. This seems like a nice sentiment, until you remember the reason Wally killed everyone is because he was impatient about how his therapy was going. What an awful story.

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Like, legitimately, this story is just awful. The basic premise--that heroes could probably do with therapy--is not a bad one. The execution is just really completely mismanaged, though. Start with the beginning. Why are Harley Quinn and Booster Gold chosen as the focus characters? Because they're the ones you could believe would orchestrate a mass murder, right? Except no. You would never believe that. Booster is not that much of a screw-up, and Harley is not that much of a villain. Neither of them have been those things for many years. The readers know that, but it feels like the writer didn't.

And that's the worst part of it all. The superficiality of the story. In the end, why was this story written? To explore the concept of therapy for superheroes? Well, then, it went about it in the worst way possible. Not everyone experiences trauma in the same way. And therefore, not everyone responds to therapy in the same way. The way therapy is depicted in this story is just wrong. Frankly, Sanctuary looks like one of the worst places to get treatment, right alongside Arkham Asylum. Do you think anybody's really going to take away from this story "It's okay to talk about your traumas if you need to"? In or out of universe?

I didn't really talk about the confession cams, but they seemed highly unnecessary. They were always the same, a 3x3 of panels featuring a superhero talking about their traumas. Most of them didn't factor into the story, and at most they felt like a common scene transition. They tried to give them some weight by revealing that the contents of all these possibly got leaked? But then they just kinda dropped that subplot. Which was really kind of serious, because the traumas range from the Protector (a character created for drug PSAs) confessing that he has done drugs to Superman talking about the burden of keeping his identity secret. How much of these did the public actually get? And if it was none, what was even the point of it being a subplot~? Like, leak that Sanctuary existed, sure, but why did Lois Lane get sent all the videos that shouldn't have existed~?

What this story has done to Wally is awful. They have completely tarnished this likeable, amazing hero by having him kill twelve people (thirteen, if you include Poison Ivy), several of them colleagues and friends. All because he's trying to fake his way through therapy when it isn't helping him as fast as he wants. Know what would have been a good story? How about he learns to cope with his trauma? How about he actually gets his family back? It's unrealistic as hell, but it's a fictional story. It's escapism. It's okay to have a happy ending. I ''want'' my stories to end in happy endings, because it's so hard to get them in real life. I want something better than this.

DC Rebirth was a breath of fresh air. Wally's return to the DC universe felt like the clouds were lifitng. The stories following Rebirth felt like a return to form after the darkening of the New 52. It felt like the stories were getting good again, like the comics were getting fun and hopeful again. It couldn't last, though, could it? This story is only three years after the Rebirth initiative. Three years? That's all the hope we get in the universe? I sincerely hope this story ends up an abberation, and not a return to form of the darker, more dour universe we put up with in the New 52. Especially given current events, you can understand why a brighter, optimistic fictional world is appealing. I sincerely hope that when comics resume publication after the pandemic, a more positive outlook continues, and stories like this are left in the garbage where they belong.

This book is fucking awful, and I am done with it. Next week, we'll start reviewing an all-new series for the Taiblog. Let's just say I'm not done ranting about injustices against the Teen Titans~

#comics #reviews #Heroes in Crisis #Taiblog

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flych1 · 4 years

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Kehlani singer on her new album

Kehlani, singer on her new album

Photo: Pari Dukovic

Kehlani

In early March, Kehlani was due to meet his label. She was preparing to release her second album - her first since she had a baby and a return to her roots R-B. She was scheduled to perform the first part of Justin Bieber's Changes tour, as well as a number of dream solo dates. Atlantic executives told him they believed in the album, which was scheduled for release on April 24, its 25th anniversary, but the coronavirus pandemic made it impossible to develop a promotion plan. We'd have to postpone it. "I was casting actors and actresses. I was doing all kinds of things," she says of all the pre-production she had completed at the time of the mid-March meeting. We're talking about a video call from Zoom; Kehlani sits alone in a sunny room in his Los Angeles home. (Later, she will be joined by her dog, a pint of ice cream and a tequila-based drink with a slice of orange coming out). It just so happens that today is the original release date. They said, "We don't think you should take it out,"" she said. "And then I went to my room and made the 'Toxic' video on my laptop." She posted it on YouTube at the end of March. "People messed with it," she adds. When Kehlani's label accepted her request to release the album this month, it was stipulated that she had to do it all herself. "If all we do is make music and press the button, then you can do it," she says. "And I was like, 'Okay, challenge accepted fucking.'" So now Kehlani and her photographer, with whom she's in quarantine, are planning and editing music videos, photoshoots, and album coverage. (She also lives with her daughter, two younger siblings, a close friend and her assistant). His garage has been converted into a two-level studio, one side for music, the other for visuals. Kehlani has been a professional musician since the age of 13. A series of mixtapes - full of overshares about having a heart built and broken - and a random but successful debut album have already made her a leading figure in the industry. His music is R-B in its purest form: songs about how love defeats you, about floating on the pure adrenaline of a crush, about the desire of someone you can't trust in your heart. It's no coincidence that when white artists like Bieber and Charlie Puth want to look into an R-B sound, they call on Kehlani to help them. The new album, It Was Good Until It Wasn't, is part of a revival of the genre in the midst of its fiercest debates. It is also a transition disc, a bridge between adolescence and adulthood. Throughout her career, Kehlani has been considered the daughter of the R-B: sexy but boyish. In her old music, she played with both sides of the binary. On the new record, it got too big. She did so immediately after giving birth to her daughter Adeya, who is now one year old. (She is currently co-parenting with her ex, Adeya's father, Javaughn Young-White, younger brother of Jaboukie from the Daily Show). "People would always be like, Kehlani is adorable or, like, Kehlani is cool hella. But then I had a baby and it made me look more feminine," she says. "So I guess I thought, OK, I'm going to start shaking my ass and talk about it." (She wanted Bieber to do a song for her album, but he refused. "Because he's a super-married guy now, it didn't really fit," she said. Kehlani's self-managed music video for "Toxic", filmed with the only camera on her MacBook, shows the nervous figure of the singer slipping and squirming, rubbing her arms and hips. "Don Julio has ridiculed me for you," she tells her former lover that she won't reach out to him, even if her body urges her to do it out of instinct. Kehlani insists this is not his last relationship, which ended publicly and painfully, with Compton rapper YG earlier this year. It's the kind of personal drama that made headlines and made Kehlani's blog famous. She writes songs that address all of this openly. Her fans grow up with her career because she is transparent, sometimes to excess. Or, as she says, I do in public, and it makes people feel like I'm not a stranger. I'm a person with a human ass. I'm screwing up in front of the whole world." The conversation about the state of the R-B was revived last November, when Lizzo, often considered a pop artist, won album of the year at the Soul Train Awards, beating soul singer Ari Lennox. ("It's clear that I'm not cool enough," Lennox tweeted after his loss. Last February, rapper Young M.A. went further, saying that "we barely have R-B". Indeed, in recent years, the superstars of the genre - like SWV, Boyz II Men, Ginuwine, Toni Braxton - and their musical descendants have mostly failed to stop the charts as they did two decades ago; many contemporary black musicians evade the label, preferring to be called "alternative R-B", while others experiment more with genres that were once declared out of bounds by the guardians. Kehlani, on the other hand, is part of a coterie of artists who maintain the relevant R-B today, alongside newcomers like Summer Walker, Bryson Tiller and Lennox. She has a song for every step of a relationship: going under it, going over it, watching the door ahead, a personal promise to stop texting her. His music seems new - not as a consistent copy of a Brandy song - but the influence is palpable. She finds the current debate about gender - what the R-B is, what it was and where it has gone - boring. It may no longer sound like it did in the 90s, but rappers (think, more recently, Drake) have expanded it beyond the desperate desire (or desperate loves) of the last century. "I think people don't know enough about music to make these kinds of accusations [that the R-B no longer exists]. The R-B is simple lyrics and a great song. Lots of harmonies and batteries and melodic production," she says, as if it were easy. "I'll never be able to make 90s R-B music. I'm never going to be able to make R-B music from the early 2000s, because that's not when I was making music. It wasn't when I experienced things that shaped my words and my sound." Kehlani was born in Oakland and raised by her aunt. His mother struggled with drug addiction, and his father died when he was 24 years old and she was very young. A stint on America's Got Talent put her in touch with Nick Cannon, who paid for her to spend time in the studio to make her first mixtape in 2014. On Cloud 19, you can hear the beginnings of a great talent: his voice is more acute and younger, but it is overflowing with emotion. On the deck of Cloud 19's "As I Am" film, she sings and succeeds in the chorus of a Mary J. Blige classic. A week after the release of her second mixtape in 2015, she signed with Atlantic Records. Kehlani turned to pop with his debut album of 2017, SweetSexySavage, an album full of rushed and half-finished ideas. It was carried out amid a personal mental health crisis, sparked by rumors that she cheated on her ex-boyfriend, NBA player Kyrie Irving, in 2016. The relentless online bullying led her to attempt suicide. (Kyrie Irving later admitted that she had never been unfaithful.) "I started an album as a person and experienced the most traumatic event of my life," she says. Her label held on until the deadline, letting her make an album from songs she barely recognized. "I had no connection with the music," she says. "I was embarrassed about everything." The new record is a reset, closer to the Grammy-nominated mixtapes that made it famous. It Was Good Until It Wasn't Gives you the Pure B-R rush, the R-B "waiting for you to call me", the R-B "the only thing that interests me is you": the hits of Brandy and Monica in the 90s, the classics of Alicia Keys of the early 2000s who fall in love. She is also less affected by the nostalgia of adolescence than by the immediacy of adult desires. His first mixtapes were about childhood and adolescence; It Was Good Until It Wasn't at peace with the way most conflicts or heartaches unfold. The title comes from a conversation with a friend about her recent breakup. That's the life of this, you know? she said. The is good and then it's not good anymore. Although she has been in the industry since she was a teenager, Kehlani has never had any decisive success for her career, and it is unlikely that the new album will deliver one. "F-MU" is hot and dancing, and the collaboration with Canadian R-B star Tory Lanez, "Can I," is a sexy earworm - although neither song seems particularly suited to virality. His greatest successes are gossip blogs that overshadow his music. His three-month relationship with YG ended just after they released a song together proclaiming their love. (Their duet came out on the eve of Valentine's Day 2020; three days later, she released a breakup song after images of him cheating her surfaced). Minutes before one of our calls, Kehlani posted a series of tweets about a feud with another Oakland native, rapper Kamaiyah, who slammed her on Instagram Live about a previously unreleased mixtape and accused her of being a colorist, among other things. "She gave the green light to my family and me and told everyone in Oakland to kill us for a song," Kehlani says. (Kamaiyah later replied, telling Kehlani, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't threaten you," but added that "a green light means going like a fight, not shooting"). A moment after our discussion, she answered a phone call from a friend and nervously asked if her tweets - which had let the rapper know there was no bad blood - were correct, if she had handled the situation properly. Kehlani and Kamaiyah had long argued over a joint mixtape, which was to be released before the release of their two albums. Her production was difficult, and even the basic decisions - how many songs she should have, what it should be called, what the visual aesthetic should be - met, according to Kehlani, with Kamaiyah's resistance. In the end, she had had enough of back and forth, and the mixtape didn't seem as essential to her as the release of her album. When she came back to our call, her mood was appalled. I tried to contact her to do good business and she said, "If the project doesn't come out, you can't have it [one piece]," she says. "Even though I wrote it." Once again, she was swept away in a drama she couldn't control, tweeting clarifications about a quarrel she didn't care about, instead of celebrating the upcoming release of her album. But why challenge a misinterpretation if she is tired of getting carried away by the drama? How can I put this to rest and out of my body? Because I don't want to wear them," Kehlani says. "Even if you never want to piss me off again, how can I make sure you know it's love on this side?" she tweeted Kamaiyah to let the rapper know she wished him the best. She is satisfied with the way she has defused an unexpected quarrel. A few years ago, it would not have been as weighted. It took a lot of to get to this point, she says. The death of two friends in three months has put a lot of things in perspective. Philadelphia rapper Chynna overdosed in April at age 25; Minnesota rapper Lexii Alijai, whom Kehlani considered "a little sister," overdosed on New Year's Day at just 21 years of age. Lexii Alijai was scheduled to perform the first part of the post-Bieber tour as the headliner. "I couldn't believe it because Alijai was so young," she says. "It was a click, it was amazing, it was sad and it was heartbreaking. I'm always trying to find the best way to help them continue their legacy." Being 25 was also more than a quarter of a life. It was a horizon she never thought she would see. "I've always had a strange feeling about being 25 or older," she says. "It's a shock because I'm now older than my father was." that's part of what made It Was Good Until It Wasn't feel like the album she finally grew up on. "I wanted to be 25 on this one," she says.

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thegreyreylo · 6 years

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I didn't see a prompt list on your blog but I wanted to know if you could do a prompt about Rey in Ben's clothes. I know you are busy but ily xoxo

The hut door was kicked open in such a violent manner that my instincts roared to life. Dropping my quill, my hand had almost reached my lightsaber when I took in exactly what had opened the door. I could hardly stifle my laughter in time as I registered what I was looking at. Rey was soaked to the bone with a wild expression on her face and slightly wobbly lip. The fishing pole she had left with snapped off at the handle and her drenched hair stuck to her face like plaster.

“Ben, I call bullshit that some old man managed to catch any of these blasted creatures with that gigantic, rotten pole.” Rey seemed to be teetering between the desire to cry from frustration or set the world on fire in aggravation - God, I love this girl.

“Well, he was-”

“Don’t you dare!” She snapped, her eyes flashing dangerously but it was a bit hard to take her seriously between the water vegetation I spotted at the nape of her neck and the icy trembles. Holding my palms up, I decided it was probably best to not poke at her at this particular moment. “How about we get you changed before you get sick?”

Confusion slowly started to replace her ferocity, “What do you mean?”

Chewing on my inner cheek to keep from chuckling, it was natural to leave my journaling and cross the room to place a kiss on her forehead. A salty, wet, musty kiss that is.

“Yes, you desert rat. You can actually get sick for being wet in a cold environment.” I explained as I carefully peeled strands of hair eyes and pushed them behind her ear.

This took her a second to wrap her head around but it was like a light bulb flickered on and by some grace of the force her eyes shown even brighter, “Wait - so that’s why I got sick after I went in the cave?”

Nodding and fighting the urge to grin at her innocence, I decided it was best to intervene. “Come on, let’s get you out of your wet clothes.”

“All of my spare tunics and leggings are drying, I doubt they are done yet. I can wait, it’s fine-”

“You can borrow some of mine, it’s fine.” It seemed almost instinctual that I would offer her my own limited wardrobe. What’s mine is hers, isn’t that right?

While we hadn’t progressed to undressing openly in front of each other, she no longer shoved me out of the hut whenever she needed to change whatsoever and it was light out. Something about the dark lowered her walls and if I was being honest, it lowered mine too. Instead, after watching me pull out one of my spare undershirts and leggings with a studied and careful expression, with one chilly hand she shoved me back to my make shift desk in the corner. “Don’t you dare, Ben Solo.”

I’m a man. Of course, I would be happy to help her change but she wasn’t there yet. I would never break her trust, so I didn’t.

“How in the hell are you this tall?” Rey swore, and a light thump emerged from behind me before her small hand pressed in to my shoulder. “I think i’ve rolled each leg at least four times and I’m still drowning.”

Oh for fucks sake.

I had never daydreamed of Rey in my clothes before - and that clearly was a mistake.

With her wet hair freed from her usual bun set up, little drops of water splattered the whole look. My black long sleeve shirt was several times larger than her tiny frame could handle. A shirt that came tightly up to the chest turned into a deep scoop, exposing her delicate collar bond and the sheen of her lightly tanned throat. It should’ve hit her waist at a natural point, but in reality it hung almost to her mid thigh and showcased her natural curves far more than her desert tunic had ever done. Don’t even get me started on the leggings, it was too big in ever way.

She was stunning, adorable, sexy.

She was mine.

“How are they not falling off?” My chuckle betrayed me this time as I tugged at the massive waist band and she swatted me away for a moment before stepping closer to me. Laughing quietly, Rey fought through the too long sleeves of my shirt to bump my chest with her fist, “Hey! This was your idea!”

“Oh, I know. I don’t regret it.” Even my awkwardness could not stop my hands as I pulled her towards my lap. I needed to be closer to her. She obliged with a small smile as she slowly straddled my waist and laced her arms around my neck

“You don’t? Even though I still look like i’m drowning, just in clothes this time?”

“No,” I whispered before stealing the briefest kiss and added, “You look like your mine.”

“I am yours.”

This was fun! Please send me more!

Love, thegreyreylo

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rxbxlcaptain · 7 years

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RxbxlCaptain’s Official Rebel Rising Review:

Since this novel was released in May, I had heard plenty of opinions -- mainly negative -- about it, so I decided to check it out for myself. I’ll be completely honest: I came into the book bracing myself against a novel that would completely ruin Jyn’s characterization and the urge to throw the book against the wall. Maybe because I came in which such horrible expectations -- Well, I didn’t hate it.

Of course, of the three Rogue One-related novels I’ve read now (Rogue One Novelization by Alexander Freed, Catalyst by James Luceno, and Rebel Rising by Beth Revis), I would say that it’s my least favorite. There were some redeeming factors, some Imperials that were actually kind of intriguing, some moments that made me go “I’m sorry, are we talking about the same Jyn Erso?” and some moments that made me go “That’s my girl!” So if you’re interested in hearing some very spoiler-y opinions of the novel, click below the cut:

My first issue with the book: It’s genre

The decided to write a book about Jyn Erso -- a woman I’d understood to have been raised as a child soldier -- as a young adult novel. Now, I have nothing against the YA genre, there’s plenty of amazing things within that genre, but... I’m questioning if it was right for this.

This leads to a significantly less violent childhood than I thought Rogue One (either the movie or the novelization) implied. Jyn doesn’t go on missions with Saw Gerrera until she’s well into her teenage years, and most of those involve coding and not actual fighting. Most of Jyn’s time with Saw is spent on Wrea, the planet where Saw’s base for the Partisans is located, learning coding and splicing. She doesn’t even stay in barracks with the other Partisans but instead has a private room to herself. No one’s gunna all favoritism on that one, Saw. But, really, the first time in the novel when Jyn shares a room with someone is when she’s in prison, which just feels... weird to me?

Another thing I have against a YA novels: There always seems to be a forced romance and this one is no exception. I’ll go into more details below, but I do, at least in part, attribute this aspect of the plot back to the fact that it’s a YA novel.

But that’s a little bit broad, so let’s narrow it down into a few more things that I did/didn’t like:

Saw Gerrera:

Read all this with the disclaimer that I have not watched Clone Wars and so my knowledge of Saw outside of Rogue One is limited to Wookieepedia and what I was told in this novel!

We all know where this book picks up: Lyra Erso has just been murdered and Galen captured up the Imperials, leaving Jyn all alone waiting for -- someone. That someone turns out to be Saw Gerrera, who Jyn has met once before: when Gerrera offered to smuggle the Ersos off Coruscant and find a homestead for them on Lah’mu. Because of this, she trusts him already.

Saw refers to Jyn as “Kid” and “Darling” a lot of the time which is such a minor detail but it feels so... weird to me. (I can really only read “Kid” in Han Solo’s voice). And it’s just a small part of Saw’s dialogue that just feels way too out of character for him, things that I can never picture Forest Whitaker saying in general.

Adorable detail: Saw takes to referring to Jyn as his daughter throughout her time there. In fact, most of the Partisans take to calling Jyn “Jyn Gerrera” since the word “Erso” is never to be mentioned in context of Jyn, per Saw’s orders. (And, for good reason, which the characters learn the hard way later on)

Saw’s number one misstep, in my mind at least, was when he finds Galen Erso, realizes he’s cooperating with the Imperials now and promptly tells Jyn that Galen has, essentially abandoned her and she should think nothing of him again while I continue to spend most of my time attempting to discover what he’s doing

Which could lead to some reeeeally fun meta about how Jyn’s feeling about Galen during Rogue One

My anger of this is, of course, rooted in the fact that I really love Galen Erso and I cry every time I picture him working on the Death Star when he really just misses his girls and wishes they were safe and happy so it probably doesn’t make other people as angry.

So Saw’s running his little side of the rebellion, which has a strange focus on what Galen Erso is going for the Empire (Saw refers to his as their “normal mission”), but don’t worry -- he’s not opposed to blowing the occasional Imperial gathering or stealing their supply shipments or causing general chaos within their ranks.

Once, against orders, Jyn followed Saw into an Imperial celebration on a planet they’d recently conquered, only to find Saw blowing up the entire thing -- both the reps from the Empire and the natives of the planet -- which Jyn knows she is not okay with.

He also has some super sketchy mottoes about fighting -- “If we used the same tactics the Empire does and brought about the same kind of fear, we’d control the people and give them the peace you are so anxious to have” and “What we fail to protect, we leave in ruins” for example-- that aren’t out of character with what we see of his tactics in Rogue One but more an explanation of why his methods were wrong.

As implied in Rogue One, the Alliance doesn’t appreciate that. However, different than I pictured in Rogue One, Saw is never a formal part of the Alliance. Idryssa Barruck seems to be the only connection back to the Alliance since, after years of working with Gerrera, she decided to join the more organized forces.

Jyn will meet another member of the Alliance later on, once she’s on Tamsye Prime and the Alliance is trying to recruit her boyfriend as a pilot (more on that later)

After Saw abandons Jyn (which I’ll talk about in the next section), he still send a spy to follow her around the planet she’s settled on to make sure she’s doing okay. Which -- I don’t know, not necessarily out of character, but definitely a dick move. Saw, either you care enough about the girl to keep her with you, or you let her live her life. One or the other, bro, not some weird grey zone in between.

Saw’s abandonment of Jyn:

If you’re talking about Saw, you’ve got to mention the “big event.”

Saw’s abandonment was... Literally nothing like a pictured. Nothing. Not at all.

Saw appears to make a snap decision to leave Jyn in the middle of a very active war zone with literally no way to get off the planet. And what seemed even more out of character to me was that Jyn guessed Saw was leaving her behind -- and she still trotted off to the bunker and let him leave her there. (See, Draven, the reason why she doesn’t follow orders is because following them normally gets her bad things)

A quick summary of the operation that leads to this: Jyn and Saw were in charge of recon of a planet, had sneaked in under the guise of being a propaganda work crew, filming the laborers of the planet to make the Empire look good. What they didn’t know was Reece Tallent, a man salty at Saw Gerrera for a whole host of reasons and who suspected who Jyn really was (and really wanted the financial benefits of turning these two in), had set this whole thing up with the Imperials. This leads to an Imperial air attack, hoping to kill Saw and Jyn.

In the midst of the battle, Saw (who was dangerously close to bleeding out at the time) tells Jyn “Hey, go hide in the bunker over there and I’ll totally come back to this planet that will be totally destroyed in two hours to get you!” to which Jyn is like “That sounds really sketchy and you’re totally going to leave me here, but okay!”

Legitimate dialogue from this novel

Jyn manages to get off planet by stealing a ship with one of the workers on the planet. They sell the ship, split the money 50/50 and never see each other again. She then finds a woman looking for someone to repair her astromech (”I can do that!” Jyn lied, seeing how she’d never repaired a droid before in her life) and hops a ride off planet with her. Halfway through, however, Jyn forges some documents for the woman -- whose name is Akshaya Ponta -- and, in thanks for helping her avoid fines, she invites Jyn to stay with her.

Turns out Jyn reminds this woman of her dead daughter and she develops a super maternal protectiveness over Jyn (which Jyn finds both really nice and really smothering, considering, you know, her mother died when she was seven.)

So Jyn moves in with this woman, doing some occasional splicing/forgery for her, but mainly she has a lot of free time which gives her time to explore my next topic...

The Romance:

I believe it’s no secret that I personally believe that Jyn Erso belongs with Cassian Andor for the rest of forever. (Guys, look around at the blog. Forget that -- look at its name)

That being said, I tried to keep an open mind with this romance.

Hadder Ponta, the boy in question (his mom is the one who took Jyn in, so they’re kinda living together?), was... fine. There was nothing wrong with him. And I don’t really have a problem with the idea of him and Jyn -- she was sixteen and had just been abandoned by Saw and he and his mother has been incredibly kind to her and he was nice (guys, he took her on real dates and bought her food and everything) and safe so I can’t really blame her for diving headfirst into a little romance -- but, as I mentioned before, it felt a little too much like a stereotypical YA romance

Fun fact about this kid: he ends up speaking to an Alliance recruiter about joining up at one point. He claims it’s because he wants to fly, but he’s also pretty certain that it’ll impress Jyn. (What doesn’t impress Jyn is the fact that the recruiter ends up being someone she knew from the Partisans and accidentally reveals more of her past to the kid than she was intending)

Their romance was a lot of “Hey, we’re about the same age! And you’re a girl and I’m a guy so therefore we’re in love, right?”

Basically, not my favorite kind of romance. (They got along but they didn’t really have chemistry)

But no worries about Hadder coming back -- he and his mother were both killed while attempting to escape the planet and they got trapped in a dogfight between Imperial and Rebellion forces.

However that leads to a whole new host of problems: Jyn keeps thinking about him for an awfully long time. Really, it’s implied she still thinks of Hadder and Akshaya Ponta when she gets her first glimpse of Cassian as the events of Rebel Rising clashes into the beginning of Rogue One.

I contribute it less to her feelings being strong enough to last the years and more to guilt. It was, in Jyn’s mind, her fault that Hadder and Akshaya ever died: if she hadn’t come to live with them, the Empire never would have come knocking on their door in the middle of the night and they wouldn’t have died in a fiery explosion. It does feed into Jyn’s resistance to becoming close to anyone ever again, that fear of hurting everyone she befriends, which could actually make great meta about Jyn’s behavior during the canon events of Rogue One.

Now, speaking of the Pontas, does that name sound familiar to you? It should!

Jyn Erso’s alias’s:

We end up seeing all of Jyn’s canon aliases throughout Rebel Rising which is, in a way, both really cool and kinda disappointing. Here’s what we learn about them...

Kestrel Dawn: Jyn dawns this one (haha, see what I did there? Shut up, I’m funny) while she’s still with Saw. In fact, she’s using this alias on the day that Saw abandons her. She ends up keeping “Dawn” for a last name (obviously “Erso” has proved to be a dangerous last name to have) but returns to “Jyn” by the time she meets the Pontas.

Tanith Ponta: See, I told you their last name would be important. Remember Akshaya’s daughter that I mentioned? Turns out her name was Tanith. When Jyn escaped off Skuhl (the Ponta’s home planet), she saw the ship Akshaya and Hadder were in crash, but out of some irrational bit of hope (see, Cassian, she does know what hope is) she tells the intergalactic customs agents that her name was Tanith Ponta in the hopes that if Akshaya and Hadder arrived, they would be able to find her.

Liana Hallik: The last alias we’re given in Rogue One (turns out the Alliance missed a few others like Lyra Rallik and Nari McVee, both references to earlier parts of Jyn’s life, being her mother and a droid the Ersos owned on Coruscant) doesn’t appear until late in the novel, when Jyn is bouncing from planet to planet simply surviving. It’s not even the alias she’s using when the Imperial arrest her, but rather the new scandocs she had just completed that the Imperials believed to be her real identity.

My favorite Jyn Erso details:

She’s smart. Saw, in the very beginning when he had no idea what to do with a child, handed her a code machine one day to allow her to play with it. Well, she did really well -- so well, in fact, that she became the main supply of forgery throughout the Partisans. If you needed a flight manifest or Imperial orders to get you through a blockade or a fake identity for Saw’s next mission: you went to Jyn and she’d fix you up. (She continues to use this skill to her advantage for the rest of the novel)

We get to see her first use of truncheons! That detail is so tiny I should not be excited by it but she was using them for the first time and I just went “Those will be very important in the future!” because I am a nerd and the scene where she uses them in Jedha City was the first moment I admitted I was completely in love with this woman.

She’s a good person. Like we’ve seen in Forces of Destiny and saving the tooka cat and in the movie itself when she’d run into the line of fire to save a child, Jyn risks her own freedom, and likely her own life, to set a group of female slaves and their children free from a smuggler. She literally overthrows an entire crew by drugging them (note: if you’ve made sexist remarks to get a woman to cook you dinner for an entire journey, she just may respond by poisoning you) and tells the slaves they’re free and gives them control of the ship, only wanting enough to make sure she can get off the next planet.

She’s knows how to survive, no matter if it’s off credits a day or from people attempting to blackmail her. She survives the a crippling doubt in the faith her mother raised her on in prison and the endless crushing blows of being orphaned again and again. In a way, you can see her grow to become the Jyn Erso we met in Rogue One... It’s just that her background is a little different than I expected.

IN CONCLUSION:

It was... fine.

Not what I pictured inside my head of what Jyn’s upbringing was like (I hesitate to say it portrays her as too sheltered, because she is still being raised in the midst of a war, but it’s a hell of a lot more sheltered than what I originally pictured when I thought of Jyn’s childhood)

The romance feels kinda forced and I think some parts are a little OOC but I didn’t hate it as much as I was expecting

If the book happens to land in your lap, it’s a quick and easy read but I wouldn’t suggest going out of your way to find it.

Now that I’ve gone on a long and rambling rant about Rebel Rising (leaving out a lot of details I’m certain I should talk about, like Jyn’s perception of her parents throughout the novel which I super fangirled over) I’d love to hear what anyone else who’s read the novel has thought about it! Feel free to drop by my inbox and discuss!

#kat reads #rebel rising #jyn erso #jynappreciationsquad #rogue one #galen erso #saw gerrera #lyra erso #cassian andor #The Partisans #the alliance #ive been in this queue since i was six years old #hold shit this is almost 3k words long #apparently i had a lot more thoughts about this book than I realized #but really #PLEASE DISCUSS #send me things about how rebel rising made you feel #also because i intend on writing a fic based on an AU of this...

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bibliophileiz · 6 years

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Supernatural “War of the Worlds” Review Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Tolerate b*cklemming

These people are far from my favorite writers on the show (that would be Berens, Glynn and Yockey, the last of whom wrote my two favorite episodes) but every time an episode they wrote airs I want to dissect all the good and bad of it anyway, and this is no exception. This is I think their third episode in a row I’ve felt the urge to review. I think it’s a coping mechanism to help me tolerate these episodes.

This was not b*cklemming’s worst episode – I still think that was the one in which Eileen died – but it was not great either. It’s watchable, don’t get me wrong. But we’ve had a string of stellar episodes this season except for two. Two. And they were both written by this duo.

Unequivocally bad things about this episode:

- Who the FUCK decided to put b*cklemming in charge of apocalypse world? There do indeed appear to be no women, period. I kept hoping the creepy hunter who attacked Mary in their last episode only thought there were no women because all the women around had the good sense to avoid him, but … nope. It appears he was right. The whole apocalypse place looks like the cast of Lawrence of Arabia with a darker aestetic. Either mittensmorgul or elizabethrobertajones (I can’t remember which and the post is too far back for me to find but both have excellent blogs!) pointed out this just keeps b*cklemming from writing creepy rape scenes all over apocalypse world, which is a fair point. However, b*cklemming has written plenty of problematic sexually violent stuff victimizing male characters, albeit usually being victimized by women (April to Cas, Toni to Sam). Also it just generally irks me when an otherwise well-written show suggests women can’t survive harsh circumstances. I know they have to stay on Supernatural, but someone please keep this pair away from Wayward Sisters. - Asmodeus sucked only marginally less in this episode than when he was introduced, and that’s only because he had the suckiest introduction of anyone in this show. He. Is. Still. Awful. I can’t believe the show is going to waste the Keeping-Cas-Locked-Up-In-Hell story line I’ve been waiting for on this assclown of a villain. - AU verse Kevin Tran is like … I would say Diet Kevin Tran except I usually like diet drinks better than their counterparts, so I guess it’s more like … Vegan Chocolate Kevin Tran. I can see the resemblance, but the original has more flavor and more richness and doesn’t work for genocidal war criminals just to see hot women. My theory before this episode aired was Kevin’s a double agent for a group of hunters who have formed a resistance, led by Asa Fox and, eventually, Mary Winchester, and if we ever get an apocalypse episode written by Berens or Glynn, I might even be proved right (about the double agent part. The Asa Fox part is a stretch, I realize this). In the meantime, this was a total waste of the character. - Did b*cklemming just forget the show is about Sam? He had that one scene with Ketch which is super forgettable. In all his other scenes, he was just kind of there. It was like they were writing and would occasionally say, “We need to give Dean’s sidekick a line now.”

Good Things (several of which have nothing to do with b*cklemming)

-Cas’ sex hair is back. - I didn’t hate the Cas-Lucifer team up as much as I expected to. In fact, I thought the scene between them at the bar was the best in the episode. I unequivocally hated the way these writers – really all the writers – wrote Lucifer last season, but b*cklemming actually wrote some of my favorite Lucifer material in the entire show. Specifically I’m thinking of Lucifer (as played by Misha Collins) telling Amara she may defeat God but she will never be him – not a Lucifer redemption moment by any means, but certainly a moment where he gets to be something other than an entitled brat. It shows even though he hates God, he also admires him. You also see this in his reaction to finding out Kelly’s pregnant. She said he was excited because it was the first time he created anything, which I remember thinking was a really in-character reaction to have. This explains why he’s so interested in whatever Cas has to say about Jack too. However, I don’t want my enthusiasm for dad!Lucifer to be taken as me wanting a redemption arc for this fucker, because I don’t. I don’t hate the idea of him almost being redeemed. We the audience are sympathetic to Jack, and once Jack realizes he can be good, he’s going to want to redeem his father, Luke Skywalker-style. I like the idea of Jack trying to “save” Lucifer – “There is still good in him, I know it!” – and for Lucifer to kind of go along with it until something happens and Lucifer reveals himself to be as entitled and jealous and petty and power-hungry as he’s always been, and then Sam and Mary or maybe Cas get to kill him. If we’re sticking with the Star Wars parallels, then I want it to be like the moment Han Solo offers Kylo Ren a second chance and Kylo stabs him instead. I like Lucifer, but at the end of the day, fuck him. - Related, I also didn’t hate Mark Pellegrino. He’s never been a bad actor, he’s just been a shallow one, but that’s the material he had to work with. When he has decent lines and isn’t smirking around evil-for-the-sake-of-evil dialogue, I find I want to punch him less. More specifically, he did a good job posturing while also showing the audience he is terrified without all his power. That little flinch when Asmodeus enters the bar, before he pretends to relax and starts casually threatening Asmodeus, was great. - We finally got acknowledgement the universe is running out of angels. - Guys. Rowena might still be alive. If Ketch is alive and Rowena isn’t, I might stop watching this show. - Cas’ sex hair is back. -Speaking of Cas, I was concerned he wouldn’t tell Dean he was working with Lucifer because he thought Dean would be mad or because he would want Sam and Dean to stay away because danger or because Lucifer talked him out of it or some bullshit like that and it would be last season all over again. I’m so, so glad they didn’t go that route even though it means we get more shapeshifting (voiceshifting?) Prince of Hell nonsense. - Lucifer calling Asmodeus the runt of the litter made me feel better. At least b*cklemming admit theirs is the worst Prince of Hell. - “Honey, you’re not Lucifer. My ex-husband’s Lucifer.” - Did I mention Cas’ sex hair is back? - I liked the witch and on the one hand wish she’d had more to do but on the other hand am worried b*cklemming would have killed her if she had another scene. - When Asmodeus referenced a hunter in his payroll, I thought, ‘I bet it’s David Haydn-Jones.’ I love being right. - Dean asking if Ketch’s tattoo was a stick-on. - The shots at the playground are all beautiful. Good job Richard Speight, Jr.! - The fight scenes are. So. Good. - Seriously. Cas’ sex hair. It’s back.

Questions I have

- Where did Lucifer get that jacket? - Why do the demons call Jack “the Jack”? - How does Ketch know Sam and Dean are looking for Jack? Sam said he reached out to “every hunter we know” but firstly, how many of those are left that aren’t dead and secondly, who of them knows Ketch but doesn’t know he’s evil? - How does Lucifer know Kevin? I thought he was locked up during Kevin’s story line.

Now let’s talk about Ketch.

I’m so used to bad writing from this pair, I didn’t even see the Ketch reveal coming. Based on their not-great track record, here is a list of things b*cklemming would totally do: - Write a less-evil twin for a dead character. - Have Ketch torture and kill a bunch of witches – to find Rowena – so he can find and kill her – because she’s a witch. - Have Arthur Ketch’s less-evil twin Alexander Ketch still ask about Mary even though he’s never met her. - Look like they’re about to give Ketch a redemption arc.

So I totally bought it.

Like … good job? Good for them for fooling me by being, like, the lowest bar of competent. It’s sort of like how I spent all of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince thinking Malfoy couldn’t be up to anything because he’d spent the five previous books showing up way too often to make the same bad jokes about Harry and Co. over and over. It’s not as good as writing well the first time, but points for improving.

And at first I was excited because I thought – and still think – Ketch will make a much better villain when not loaded down with Men of Letters baggage because the Men of Letters were cartoonishly stupid and Ketch was actually threatening when not anywhere near them. But … where are they going with this? k-vichan pointed out this episode undoes both Mary’s victories from last season – knocking Lucifer into AU World and killing Ketch. Which is typical b*cklemming. To be fair, we knew Lucifer had to come back, but what could they possibly do with Ketch they haven’t already done? His villain arc ended perfectly – Mary killed him in defense of Dean. That was literally the best way he could have possibly died. It was the cathartic, climactic moment of last season’s emotional arc. I’ve seen some people suggest Dean will get to kill Ketch now and – no. No. Killing Ketch was always going to be Mary’s victory, and I’ll be disappointed in the show and the writers if they take that away from her.

All in all, a mixed bag of an episode. Which is disappointing after a string of nothing but good episodes this season from everyone but b*cklemming. (Ish. I’m afraid we may not be looking at the cowboy episode rationally. I’m going to have to wait until Netflix gets the new season and watch it again and decide then if I’m being rational about liking it or if I’m just excited about Dean’s cowboy hat and Cas’ fake western accent.) But next week we’re back to Glynn and then Berens and then Wayward Sisters, so hopefully it’s a long time before we have to deal with this nonsense again. Meanwhile, here are some things I want out of future episodes.

- Kevin being cool again. - Mrs. Tran. - Mary Winchester. - (louder for the people in the back) MARY WINCHESTER! - Rowena. - Dean figuring out the Cas he’s talking to on the phone is not Cas. - AU Resistance leader Asa Fox - Something cool in apocalypse world other than a church Jerry Wanek built. (Good job Wanek, I’m so sorry it couldn’t be in a better episode.) - Maybe some other AU resistance versions of characters like Bela Talbot (unlikely but a girl can dream), Godron Walker (AU Resistance Gordon Walker would be awesome!), Ellen Harvelle (bonus points if she and Bobby are married), Jo Harvelle (acceptable if they can’t get Ellen), FemCastiel (bonus points if she also ends up in Real World and meets Sam and Dean and Dean’s like, “Who’s the hot angel?” and she’s like, “My name is Castiel,” and Sam starts laughing and Dean’s like, “Fuck, I hope Chuck’s not making this one into a book.”)

#supernatural spoilers #13x07 #b*cklemming wank #b*cklemming have written the only not-great episodes this season #i'm just saying #i need a tag for them if i'm going to keep reviewing just their episodes #how I learned to stop worrying and tolerate b*cklemming

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seoulfulscenarios · 7 years

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Chance Encounters (M)

Pairing: Jimin x Wheein of MAMAMOO IM GONNA BE THAT ONE BLOG HUH

Summary: Wheein can’t even go out in a simple disguise without attracting the attention of others. Whether it’s the attention she wants, however, she has to decide that for herself.

Genre: smut, nothing else

Warnings: oral, dom x sub action if you squint, fuckboy! Jimin is a threat to us all

Word Count: 3.8k

Author’s Note: I hope you enjoy! I’m sorry if it took long. I’m slower than molasses.

It wasn’t everyday that a foreigner walked into a popular bar in the center of Busan, accompanied by nothing but the sorrows of her daily life. With her bright, ginger tresses, numerous freckles, simple but enticing, black bodycon dress, and fresh Ray-Ban sunglasses, she stood out from the sweaty clubgoers around her.

And of course, this outlandish appearance brought the Westerner attention from many Korean drunks, but after hearing her fluent, sassy Jeolla accent, drunk men did an about face and went on with their lives, hoping to score with someone a little less resilient.

She didn’t know whether it was the sickening smell of alcohol lingering on the breath of clubgoers around her, or the epilepsy-inducing lights of the club flashing before her, but no one had yet to see past her disguise and identify her as Jung Wheein, lead vocal and main dancer of MAMAMOO, not as a random ginger, freckled woman from the opposing hemisphere.

Who could blame them? With her adorable dimples and shy demeanor on stage, none of the MOOMOO’s in Korea and around the world would expect to find her alone in a bustling nightclub, downing drinks as if her life depended on it. To everyone else, the ground she walked on bloomed with flowers after each step she took; she was literally sunshine.

“Another one, please,” Wheein pleaded, pushing her glass for the bartender to take. “You’ll call a cab once I get out of control, right?”

The middle-aged man nodded wordlessly, turning around to prepare her another drink. He was way too accustomed to this shit.

“Scratch that request,” a man emerged from the crowd on the dance floor, taking his place at the seat to the left of her. He smiled in response to her look of disgust, a crooked tooth the only imperfection in his other perfect smile. “Two mixed soju drinks, whatever flavor.”

“He means just one,” Wheein corrected the strange man, giving him a scan up-and-down before turning back to the bartender. “I’d still very much so like another glass of somaek, however.”

“You’re not a fan of soju?”

“It’s not that at all; I love soju,” Wheein remarked. “I just don’t accept drinks from men I don’t know. For all I know, you could’ve paid the bartender to put something in there way before I got here.”

The man winced at her remark.

“F-Fair enough,” he cursed silently once hearing his own hesitation, causing her to smirk. She, Jung Wheein, scared someone? Well, damn; she might as well take on this alter ego more often. “I like an independent woman.”

Her eyes rolled into the crevices of her brain at his flirty comment, but of course, he nor anyone could see past her expensive shades. Plus, could this man see, too? He had shades that could probably match the price of her own, hiding his expression from those around him. With a simple white V-neck, spotless black slacks, and shining dress shoes, she could rightfully assume that he was pretty good-looking, or at least well-off.

The bartender placed the man’s mixed drink against the wooden bar table with a soft thud, giving him as little as a nod before turning to prepare Wheein’s simple yet powerful drink. The newcomer then brought the glass to his lips for a quick taste, but not before asking Wheein an important question.

“Well, anyway, more importantly, why is it that a woman who obviously isn’t from this country have a flawless understanding of the language?” The “foreigner” stiffened momentarily, but the man obviously didn’t pick up on it. He continued with his interrogation, only taking his attention off her momentarily to pay for his mixed drink . “Because if you were familiar with this area, I’m positive that I would’ve remembered your fiery-red hair around here.”

Um...

Wheein had to fight against the urge to twiddle her thumbs in her lap — where was her fidget spinner when she needed it? — in her mind, she had only come up with a name, birthday, and hometown for this cheap disguise before heading out from her hotel room.

��When I was a foreign exchange student here in Korea, I stayed in Gwanju with my host family,” Wheein explained, surprising herself with the confidence in her voice. “While learning proper Korean, I simply picked up the accent of the region there. Is that too hard to believe?”

“Not at all,” the man replied smoothly, running his hands through his hair in a rather — what was it — familiar way? “Well, what brings you here to Busan? There’s not much here...”

“What are you talking about? There’s everything here,” she sighed, cradling her face in her palm. To her, Busan was almost like an unreachable dream. “It’s not too noisy like Seoul, but it’s not too quiet, either.”

“If you say so,” he sing-songed, bringing his drink to his lips once more. As he pulled the drink back to set it on the table before them (but not before licking his own lips), Wheein couldn’t help but to study the shape of his lips. They weren’t too large, yet they weren’t too small, either; it was as God had given him the perfect balance for something so simple but so important. She just wanted to lean forward and graze over them with the pads of her fingers, before closing the space between them to seal his lips with hers. Before she knew it, Wheein found herself taking an irresponsible swig from her glass in an attempt to fight off these strong emotions. “I guess it’s because I’ve lived her almost all my life.”

“Hmm...maybe...”

The man then leaned back in his chair and turned his head to her, saying nothing for a few moments. It was if he was doing his best to break down the disguise and try to find the real her.

“Enough with the small talk, though.” He ran his hand through his hair again, rising from his chair and reaching out with one hand for her to hopefully take. “It’s lonely dancing alone. Wanna join me?”

Wheein chuckled at his boldness. “It definitely can’t be lonely on that dance floor with hundreds of—”

Her ears perked up as an incredibly familiar voice vibrated against her eardrums. Hwasa’s “My Heart,” well, “My Heart” with probably four hundred times more bass suddenly poured from the nightclub’s sound system. It took all her willpower to not cheer aloud in support for her best, best friend.

MAMAMOO? Wheein blinked numerous times behind her Ray-Ban’s, genuinely confused by this DJ’s sudden change in music. In adult nightclubs, and not cheesy karaoke rooms for once? Wow, we really made it...

The upbeat atmosphere of the club finally slowed down, taking on a more sensual and laidback persona.

And so did she.

“Sure, why not?” Wheein placed her hand in his outstretched one, allowing him to pull her to her feet. It was time to let loose and have a little fun, she reasoned.

Staring at only the stranger’s back as he lead her through the throng of dancers, Wheein finally noticed the alcohol’s effects on her mind, body, and soul. Her face warmed up, her judgement waned, and her self-confidence shot through the roof of the small club, heading towards infinity and beyond. Despite the mixture of beer and soju running through her system, she felt invincible.

Deeming the center of the dance floor suitable for the two of them, the man spun her gently in an attempt to pin himself against her from behind, but Wheein decided to start their dancing off strong. Reaching deep inside herself, she easily found this newfound self-confidence and reached for her dance partner’s shoulders, pulling him against her so they were face-to-face, chest-to- chest, and hips-to-hips. Her partner was obviously surprised by this forwardness in her, but only momentarily, for he started moving against her, getting lost in her secret best friend’s solo song. And astonishingly, his motions were rather fluid— was he a backup dancer of some sort?

Songs came and left, but Wheein and the mystery man’s chemistry remained. At this point, he had turned her around to feel himself against her backside. Amidst the heat of the sensual dancers around her, the temperature between kept rising and rising, Reaching back, she pushed his neck forwards and leaned back against his muscular chest, hoping to get as much contact with him as humanly possible.

“Damn, baby,” he husked against her neck, his voice aching with desire. “With those hips moving against me like that, I don’t know if I’ll be able to hold back...”

“Then don’t.” Lost in the heat of the alcohol flooding her system, Wheein found herself swirling her rear into his front even further, but his strong hands stilled her hips, stifling her grinding. She turned her head back too him, a little horny and a little annoyed. A deadly combination. “W-Why’d you stop me?”

He said nothing in response, dipping down to whisper in her ear.

“Are you ready to leave yet?”

Wheein had never moved faster in high heels her whole life.

After a short ride in a taxi and a desperate, heated make-out session and handjob in the back seats, Wheein allowed the man to pull her into an empty apartment, one that obviously hadn’t been occupied in presumably weeks. Kicking off her heels at the door, she had little time to ask about his personal life — hell, she still didn’t even know his name — , however, because before she knew it, the man had Wheein in his arms, carrying her to his bedroom. As soon as he stepped foot into the room, he dropped her onto the bed, catching her completely off-guard.

She had to admit; the aggressiveness of her mystery lover was rather arousing. But the force of the sudden action was too much for her disguise. Her ginger wig went flying to the ground beside her, and so did her glasses, revealing Jung Wheein of MAMAMOO, well, with multiple faux freckles splattered across her face.

The mystery man’s face fell; whether it was from disgust or shock, she wasn’t entirely sure.

As the disguise left her, the independence and confidence of her alter ego vanished along with it, allowing the shy, puppy-like features of her true self to finally emerge. Her hands flew up to her mouth in surprise, as if she herself was surprised by her sudden transformation.

She couldn’t help the words that suddenly spilled from her mouth; like mentioned before, independence and confidence were replaced with apprehension and uncertainty. Millions of scenarios played in her head; at the very least, her career could be ended by this malfunction.

“Whatever you do, p-please don’t say anything to the press—”

An involuntarily gasp cut her pleas short as the man swiftly peeled off his expensive shades, before setting them rather calmly on the nightstand.

The so-called mysterious man before her disappeared, revealing the lead dancer, lead vocalist, and arguably, in her eyes, the hottest member of BTS, Park Jimin.

Could this situation get any more fucked up?

Wheein, out of habit, curled into herself as Jimin approached her on the king-sized bed, sitting beside her.

“So, it looks like we both have pretty big secrets...” he began, his voice fading away as he finally focused on the features of her face, which had been so stealthily hidden this entire night.

His thumb swiped across her left cheek, wiping the “freckles” from her face. He bit his lip, as if in thought on what to do next. But to her, it was a little too obvious, considering they were both in a bed, swimming in intoxication and lust.

“And, this getting out would undoubtedly be harmful for both of us, so let’s just keep this little secret between us, hm? Because I don’t have any intentions on cutting it short just here...”

As the last words left his plump lips, his eyes trailed down to stare at her glossed lips. It was a silent request, no, with the desperation in his eyes, a plea to continue.

He dipped his head down, inching closer and closer, until their lips met for the second time that night. This time, the kiss was much more intimate, considering that both individuals finally knew the true identities of one another.

“Take this off,” she whined, breaking the kiss sliding her hands down his shoulders to tug at the soft fabric of his shirt. She bunched up the material and looked him in the eyes, her eyes pleading. “Please.”

Nipping at the sensitive skin of her neck, he pulled back to chuckle at her eagerness. “Okay, wait a minute.”

Jimin moved his hands from her face to reach for the hem of his shirt, slowly — she practically keened at him to pick up the pace — pulling it upwards and revealing those abs and biceps that she had only seen meters and meters away from stage. He tossed the article of clothing to the floor before reaching for Wheein again, kissing her with even more ferocity than before. The female idol’s hands latched onto the man’s body this time, feeling as much of Jimin’s lean muscles under her fingertips as possible. He moaned at her sensual caresses.

“Turn around,” he demanded, bringing his hands to her slim waist to maneuver her before she could even do it herself. No long after, Wheein felt rough hands drag along her back, undoing the zipper of her tight bodycon dress in record time. She felt more vulnerable that ever under his presence, drinking in the exposed skin inch-by-inch with his hungry eyes. Unluckily, or luckily for Jimin, she had taken the risk to wear neither a bra or panties on this wild night, deeming the dress too constricting on its own.

Before the tight dress could even make a pat against the ground, Jimin was already placing his weight on hers, a breath of the word “fuck” the only thing coming from his lips. Wheein fell back against the pillows from the sudden force, snaking her arms around his neck to pull him in closer.

Tweaking at her sensitive nipples, Jimin was far too impatient to spend too much time on foreplay, or at least focus on the parts of Wheein’s body he deemed most important. His hands slid down the center of her body, purposely avoiding her wet heat to massage her firm thighs. Finally listening to her pathetic whines, he cupped her mound before teasing one, sly finger against her slit, running the finger up and down the area to collect some of the liquid onto his hand.

“You’re so wet for me, Wheein-ah,” he groaned as pushed one finger into her tight entrance, imagining that same pressure around the erection pressing against the fabric of his slacks. A whimper to match his groan erupted from Wheein’s pretty lips. “I hope you weren’t dripping onto the floor in that nightclub, or did you get this wet jerking me off in the back of that cab and stopping before I came, even though I told you not to?”

“J-Jimin, I—” Wheein’s words caught in her throat as she felt Jimin’s thumb against her pulsing clit, and her head pressed into the pillows, while her hips pressed unconsciously against his skilled hand. “More—”

“More? More what? More fingers?” Jimin pressed another finger into her heat, twisting them inside her experimentally. “Or do you want my tongue on you?”

She nodded furiously at his final question.

“Use your words, baby,” he whispered, focusing on her clit. “I know you can.”

God, she’d seen that tongue on his stage; it had a mind of its almost. Wheein, like any other fangirl, wanted that tongue against their womanhood at least once in their lifetime. It was impossible for any sane fan of BTS to not have thoughts like these at least periodically.

“Please eat me out, use your tongue, please— ah!”

The male idol’s head dipped down to give her lower lips an experimental lick with his tongue, causing a surprised cry to leave her.

Oh, God. Is he good at everything? Wheein could only wonder as her mind drifted into cloud nine.

Arching off the mattress, both of Wheein’s hands moved to pull on his colored locks, pressing his face into her pussy even further. Jimin responded eagerly to her gestures, pushing his mouth against her with more ferocity. He groaned at her musky, natural taste, collecting the liquid in her opening with his skilled tongue.

“I could eat you out for days,” Jimin commented aloud, causing even more moisture to spill from her tight hole, and onto the white bedsheets and his beautiful face.

The vibrations of his animalistic noises spread to her sensitive nub, and her moans evolved into keens and whimpers.

At this point, Wheein was only a simple slave to Jimin’s ministrations. It was almost comical, how hours ago Wheein had so successfully guarded the fence she built around her, but Jimin — oh, sorry, the so-called mystery man — had chipped away at the fortifications slowly, until she finally had her legs spread in front of him, allowing him to do anything that came to his perverted mind.

Catching on to her change in reactions, Jimin’s mouth traveled up to her clitoris, messing with the twitching bundle of nerves there. Not wanted to leave her tight entrance unattended, he pushed two fingers inside of her, forming a two-fingered gun with his hand while bringing his lips around her clit to give it a hard suck.

“Shit!” Never had so many curse words fell from Wheein’s mouth, well, at least not around a guy, considering this guy before her was extremely handsome. Her stomach muscles clenched above him, signaling her approaching orgasm. She was so, so close, she could almost taste it. And it hasn’t even been that long! Wheein’s eyes scrunched close, as she felt herself falling into the abyss of pleasure —

But something must have caught her midway, for the pleasure was gone as quickly as it had appeared. Wheein’s eyes reopened quickly to find Jimin fiddling in his pocket to pull out a condom, placing the corner of the wrapper between his teeth before reaching back down to undo his belt. Using her arms as leverage, she leaned up, giving him an incredulous look.

Reading her expression, Jimin quipped, with the condom still in his mouth, “I may be a nice man, but do you really think I’d let you cum after what you pulled in the back of that cab?”

Wheein’s bottom lip jutted out; he was right. Yet, she wasn’t pouting anymore when Jimin finally slipped off her boxer briefs, allowing his raging erection to meet her ravenous eyes.

In a few blinks of her eyes, Jimin had Wheein’s thighs wrapped snugly around his hips, as he grinded his rubber-sheathed tip against her teasingly. Feeling his hard-on against her, it was obvious he wanted this just as much as her, but Jimin’s ego obviously wouldn’t be completely satisfied, of course, without seeing her squirm a little. Each swivel of his hips had her pussy clenching around nothing, anticipating the good events that were to come.

“I want you to watch every inch of me as you take me in, okay, baby?” Jimin leaned down to place a chaste kiss against her lips, the only innocent gesture amidst all this madness. She nodded at his words, consenting to absolutely anything if it was to get him inside of her faster. He pressed his length against her sopping entrance, and within seconds, he was gliding inside of her.

Jimin let out an aggressive, uncharacteristic groan as he felt the female idol’s tight walls suck around the head of his member, so much that he had to pause himself to prevent himself from completely losing it. Fuck, it had been so long that he had forgotten how it really felt to be inside a woman, his right hand becoming his best friend in the midst of his hectic schedule.

“Fuck, fuck, Jimin...” Wheein’s thighs quaked and quivered in pure bliss, so much that Jimin had to remove his hand from between them and hold them in place.

“God, Wheein-ah, I can barely move inside you,” he observed, his voice straining from the tremendous pressure around his dick. It was just too much for him to handle; his hands tightened around her soft thighs, the stress of his grip probably enough to leave fresh bruises there in the morning. “How long has it been since someone fucked you good?”

“I-It’s been a good while...” Her jaw dropped slack with pleasure as she felt the man bottom out inside her, pausing momentarily to allow her body to adjust to this long-forgotten feeling, of feeling so satisfied and full. She needed him to wait, but only for a few seconds. “J-Jimin—”

He didn’t have to be told twice.

His hips drew back just as fast as they slammed back against her. Wheein’s mouth dropped into a perfect “o” shape, only cries and other unintelligible sounds able to slip from her mouth.

Jimin’s tongue darted from his mouth to lick his plump lips as he slid in and out of her skillfully, watching the part where their bodies connected and letting out grunts and breathy whines here and there.

She clawed onto the bedsheets and thrashed her head to the side. Noting her movements, Jimin’s hips slowed and finally came to a stop mid-stroke. Wheein rolled upwards to reach out to him, her manicured nails digging into his toned thighs. She held onto this overwhelming pleasure like a lifeline, something she considered the only thing in the world at the moment keeping her sane and alive.

“Please keep going,” she breathed, her voice quivering with want. “I need this.”

“No,” his tone was firm, “I want your eyes to stay on me, no matter how good I’m making you feel.”

Wheein’s nails dug into the bedsheets once again as she stared deep into her brown eyes, finally feeling his girth stretch her over and over again, with no interruptions. Bringing a leg to his shoulder, Jimin slammed into her at a new angle, one that undeniably reached her sweet spot. Because now Wheein was crying out at each thrust, gazing unseeingly into his eyes.

It was all over for Wheein; her mind disconnected with the pleasurable friction coming from inside of her, with the embarrassing squelches of her nether regions, with the feral noises erupting from the man above her, with reality— She was too far gone; she was approaching the cliff of sanity without any brakes, and she was bound to fall off into the abyss again at any given moment, without anything to catch her this time.

And that moment was now.

“I-I’m—”

A ear-piercing scream finally announced Wheein’s powerful orgasm. Jimin did his best to power her through this state of ecstasy, but his hips faltered in their movements, showing that he was close to exploding as well.

Jimin wasn’t too far behind her; the clenching of her walls around him proved far too much for him to handle. It wasn’t too long before he emptied himself into the condom surrounding his softening erection with a drawn-out moan, filling the rubber with drops of his warm seed. She continued to quiver around him, milking him for all he was worth.

After his final stroke, Jimin fell on top of her, breathing heavily into Wheein’s blotched neck. She could only smile down at the young man, running her fingers through the male’s hair for what could possibly be the final time.

Or was it?

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girl-next-door-writes · 7 years

Text

All I Want

Characters: Tony Stark x Reader

Summary: Post Civil War Tony feels he deserves everything that is coming to him. Being his own worst enemy and locked in his own head will he grab the small ray of hope or will he drown himself in self-pity?

Word Count: 1475 words

Prompt: Give Me Love by Ed Sheeran

A/N: This is the first of my little somethings for @yellowtheremarvelfan and her amazing celebration challenge. It’s a bit of a rewrite of a Dean fic (like a complete overhaul) and I warn you that it is a little angsty but for those of you who know me I couldn’t resist a fluffy ending.

F.R.I.D.A.Y. had been blasting classic rock constantly in the lab for the past few days which was a sign to everyone to steer clear, that’s if anyone was actually there anymore. The songs, although each with a kicking beat and some epic drum and guitar solos, all had a theme. The singers were pouring out their hearts and though the name of the girl was always different the sentiment was the same, each bringing back memories of that one girl they had once loved and had lost. The unspoken thought that maybe life would have turned out so differently had they just held onto her and Tony sat at a console with this head in his hands, eyes closed as he fought his demons alone. His eyes flickered up to the bottle of scotch. It would be so easy right now in his sleep deprived state to just drown his sorrows, numb the pain so he could just pass out and get some rest.

Letting out a frustrated yell and slamming his fists down on the bench in front of him he cursed himself for everything, each chastisement he had ever received playing on a loop in his mind until he gave in and unscrewed the bottle cap, not even bothering with a glass he took a large swig of the incredibly expensive and smooth amber liquid which burned the back of his throat. He shouldn’t be around people. He was toxic. Instead he had tried to lose himself in work, maybe something that would help Rhodey. The guilt of that whole situation flooded over him and once more the bottle made its way to his lips.

Perhaps partying would have been a better way to go, more of a distraction. It had been months since his last meaningless drunken hook up and although he was sure there were several potential partners in the nearby bars this evening he knew he’d once again be waking up alone. There was something missing. He wasn’t sure why these brief encounters did nothing but make the ache inside his chest worse. No, that was a lie. He knew exactly why but he wasn’t about to let that thought linger in his mind. He certainly wasn’t about to think of her. Letting that thought in gave it potential to grow and he was having enough trouble fighting it without it getting any stronger. It just wasn’t going to happen. Girls, no, women like her, they weren’t for the likes of him. Just look what had happened with Pepper. He didn’t deserve a love like her, not after everything he had done. No. He had been right to barricade himself here in the lab and work. He couldn’t hurt anyone if he was alone.

Just as the lure of the alcohol had grown too much, the temptation to call her was increasing with every sip. Slamming the bottle down as if it had betrayed him, he rose to his feet and began to pace the room like a caged tiger. He had been so certain he was doing the right thing, had been on the right side but the images of his friends in those cells, Rhodeys body laying broken, the hurt and confusion in her eyes as he refused to listen to her, they all haunted him to the point of madness. Something had to give, and maybe that would be his sanity.

He had pushed them all away, so desperate to save everyone he had ended up here, alone, slowly turning his blood into alcohol. Did he not deserve some comfort? Just the tiniest hint that he was not the bad guy. Maybe he should call her, maybe tell her how he felt, hold her in his arms, lose himself in the scent of her shampoo. No. All he needed was a little time. All these feelings should burn out sooner or later given enough time and alcohol. His hand gripped the bottle once more and by the time it hit the table again it was half empty. He was definitely well on his way to alcohol poisoning. He huffed out a chuckle at that thought. A fitting end to a not so super hero.

The image of her from happier times slid effortlessly from his subconscious. She was sitting at the kitchen counter watching him make breakfast, eyes bright as she had laughed and leaned across, reaching out her hand gently wiping the smudge of pancake batter from his cheek. A jolt of electricity had raced through his body at her touch and his eyes fell on her soft lips. All he had wanted in that moment had been to lean across and taste those lips but Steve had appeared and the moment broken.

It was these brief moments that his brain seemed to hoard and pull out just to torture him, especially when he was tired or drunk, probably both. Knocking back the whiskey he felt the edges of the world getting fuzzy as the heat of the liquid slid down his throat. Lately he had been craving more of those little moments. His life had been so dark, so suffocating without her around. Selfishly he want to draw out the happy moments until they all ran into each other leaving him with just one life filled with her. When he was with her he felt safe, like he could finally rest. Looking down he saw his phone in his hand, her picture smiling up at him and the urge to press the button and hear her voice was alluring.

Shaking his head he dropped his phone as if it was a piece of molten rock. Maybe he should just let her go, let the thought of her disappear. Hell, there was no maybe about it. He would only end up hurting her either emotionally or physically, maybe even both. No. He had to let her go. She deserved so much better than him.

And yet… The soft lilting tones of Ed Sheeran drifted through the room and his brow furrowed at the sudden change. Turning a little unsteadily his eyes fell on the open door and mixed in with the memory of her laughter, her sarcastic tones, the way she looked first thing in the morning when she hadn’t quite woken up yet was the very solid form of her standing there, her arms folded across her chest and eyebrow raised. He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. The corners of his mouth twitched up and the urge to run to her, hold her, taste her lips rose within him. His heart beat loudly in his chest and he gripped the nearby desk to steady himself. Yeah, he was gonna tell her. It might be the alcohol talking but suddenly he was so sure. He wanted love. He wanted her love so badly.

“Tony?” her voice was soft and low, as if she didn’t want to startle him and he could hear her concern and with that one word from her the thought that maybe he could be saved sparked inside him. She crossed the room, her eyes scanning his face and when she reached up to cup his cheek his eyes fell closed and he leaned into her touch. A touch that felt like fire and ice, soft and solid all at once. Gently taking him by the hand he followed her from the lab wordlessly like a child.

Once inside his room she tugged at the hem of his t-shirt, pulling it over his head and tossing it into the pile of laundry that looked it had been building since Pepper had left. He became aware that he probably smelled really bad right now, he hadn’t washed for days and stale sweat combined with alcohol was never a seductive scent. She turned and he felt a panic raising in his chest. Reaching out he grabbed her arm. “Stay.” He looked so young and lost, she smiled warmly.

“I’m just gonna grab something to sleep in. I’m not going anywhere okay. I’ll be right here with you.” He nodded, feeling relieved and a little bit silly for coming across so desperate, he just needed her.

Nothing more was said as they both changed for bed and slipped under the crisp Egyptian cotton sheets and as he felt her curl into the crook of his arm, her hand coming up to rest on his chest, he felt at peace. He needed love, wanted to beg for her to love him but instead he bent his head and placed a tender kiss to the top of her head and wrapped his arms around her. Exhaustion began to take over as he sighed out “I love you.” And he could have sworn he heard her say those same three little words before he descended into sleep.

Tag: @deanxfuckingadorablexwinchester @nea90sweetie@knittingknerdy@feelmyroarrrr @vintagevalentinexx @goody2shoessmut @cojootromuelle@palaiasaurus64 @littleblue5mcdork@littlenerdgirl16@iwillbeinmynest @buckyhawk @almondbuttercup @beccaanne814-blog @canumoveyourseatup-no @callamint @like-a-bag-of-potatoes

#myfic #something I wrote #deidre'scelebrationchallenge #Tony x Reader #Tony Stark

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yoireverse · 7 years

Text

fast-forward

((welcome back to the reverse au!! this fic is a bit of a mess, but i got it done, thank gosh. shout outs to all the new followers here, oh my goodness!! ♥♥♥ if you draw anything for the au, pls tag @wbtrashking + @narootos!))

summary: Yuuri Katsuki has been fighting to get golds since age thirteen. He watches his peers fall to the side, growing nervous as his shadow gets longer and the medals start piling up. Yuuri’s coach is ecstatic. Yuuri is starting to count how many callouses litter his heels. By age twenty-seven, everything tires him, but he is especially exhausted to keep holding onto his spot at the top. word count: ~3k rating: t ✮read on ao3 | ✮reverse au fics | ✮reverse au art →my personal | em’s art blog

Hasetsu is a quiet town, and the ice skating rink closest to Yuuri’s home is an hour jog from the inn.

Yuuri moves from basic training to private coaching fairly quickly.

He, Yuuko, and Takeshi start drifting apart at age ten or so, when Yuuri has obviously accelerated beyond simple ice dancing and learning to do jumps. His fluidity is graceful to the point of catching the attention of everyone lingering around the rink, so the man holding the class pulls him aside. “Listen,” he says, whispering to the wide-eyed boy, “I know it might difficult, with tourism on the decline in Hasetsu, but tell your parents we’ll work something out. You should start thinking about learning how to skate competitively.”

The boy nods sheepishly, delighted that his skill in figure skating is being praised. Yuuri talks to his parents about it and they nod happily, eagerly mentioning that they’ll figure out the financial part and telling him not to worry about anything. Minako takes her support a step further and pats Yuuri on the back, saying that she’ll be there to support all of his competitions. She thinks the move is good for him, so he flushes and sits in anticipation as his parents make calls, setting up practice sessions with a new coach.

Katsumi Ota is a stern woman. She is of average height, but her jaw is square instead of round. A dark ponytail swishes behind her when she skates, and she gives Yuuri a terse greeting, smiling just slightly. “This will not be easy, but now is the time to learn, so your joints have time to adjust. Are you ready, Yuuri?”

Yuuri nods, yelping his response back.

That first day, Yuuri falls twenty times and bumps into other people at the rink about five times. He’s achingly bruised, and when he goes home to soak in the hot springs that evening, he heatedly tells his father, “I’m going to practice until I don’t fall, or I’m going to quit!!”

He never winds up quitting.

Katsumi trains Yuuri until he’s bleeding, until he needs first aid and has tears in his eyes. She looks at him and says, “We’re done here.”

Yuuri looks back, wiping blood off of his nose with the back of his coat, and he stubbornly replies, “I’m not finished!”“

The woman smiles in return, pleased with his willpower. "Good. We’ll continue for a while longer, and then you have to rest.”

“But I’m getting the hang of the jumps!”

The boy’s coach flicks him in the forehead before pointing to his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. “You need to ice that, and I don’t mean sticking your nose on this ice by crash-landing again. You have to rest to improve sometimes, you know?”

Katsumi teaches him to do rhythmic figure eights when he’s feeling anxious, and teaches him the methodologies of competitive jumps, pointing out how best to angle himself and take off to land cleanly.

From age eleven to twelve, she helps mould the unsteady boy with watery caramel eyes into a thoughtful competitor.

Yuuri Katsuki enters his first competition at age thirteen, making waves underneath Ota’s tutelage. It takes two more years for Yuuri to break through, but once he does, Ota hugs him with tears in her eyes.

She says, “You did it, Yuuri. All that practice? All the aches, pains, and tears? It was all for this.”

Yuuri holds the placard for first place at Japanese nationals with a breathless look, eyes wide and lips open in shock.

The gravity of what he’s accomplished doesn’t hit him until later.

When Yuuri is seventeen years old, he takes first place at the Juniors. His family loudly applauds him; Yuuri himself is inordinately surprised. Katsumi isn’t shocked at all - for years, she’s watched her finest student carve his place in figure skating, and she knows he’s destined for great things, so long as he doesn’t get swept up by the pressure.

She knows that her time as Yuuri’s coach is almost over - she doesn’t have the credentials or drive to push Yuuri further. He got this far by trying his best, pushing through his weak technical with supreme performances. She’s a moment away from calling in a few favors from athletes she used to know when the Junior qualifiers begin.

A man arrives at Ice Castle in a fresh-pressed suit. He asks to speak to Yuuri, who’s been learning English, but still has a long way to go before he’s conversational. Yuuri keeps a light eye on figure skating heavy-hitters, but he’s still young, and he can’t be expected to know how prominent a person has just come to his home rink.

Rehan Lietner adjusts his collar. Katsumi brings him over and serves as a translator when Yuuri finds it a bit too difficult to come up with what he’s trying to say in English. Eventually, he comes up to shake Yuuri’s hand, and the teenager shakes back nervously.

“I want you to continue to shine,” Rehan says, his voice steady and calm, “I want to train you in Austria.”

Yuuri blinks, processes the words, and then exhales with a question.

“Excuse me?”

Rehan joins the Katsuki family for dinner to discuss coaching fees, travel expenses and so forth. Yuuri is asked multiple times whether he’s interested in becoming Rehan’s solo pupil, and whether he’s willing to move to Austria to do so, and he says that he is.

His heart is racing. Yuuri’s not sure he’s ready for the Senior circuit, but he tells himself that he is. He tries to keep his urge to freak out and scream under control, even while he gets his visa, books his flight, and sits next to his new coach with unsteady hands and sweaty palms.

They spend the first few days in Austria getting adjusted to the time difference. Rehan shows Yuuri the rink, a few cool places to eat in town, and the gym where he’ll do most of his conditioning. Yuuri nods in a daze, quite frankly overwhelmed by Vienna’s towering buildings and bustling city life.

Once practice starts, Yuuri starts to come back to himself.

Rehan pushes Yuuri to his limits. He’s a friendly coach, one for Yuuri to lean on when he’s in tears, when he feels like giving up, but after everything, Yuuri wants to win.

After proving himself at the Juniors, he wants to win the Seniors, no matter what it takes, and Rehan, with his experience in coaching Olympic athletes and figure skaters through many, many seasons, and he encourages Yuuri’s artistry.

Yuuri collapses and breaks down. He runs from Rehan a handful of times, and struggles to claw his way up in the Senior division. He has trouble keeping up with his rink mates, and his self-loathing only continues to grow. Anxious energy spurns him on, drives Yuuri to get silvers and bronzes, but golds remain out of his reach for years.

Then, when Yuuri turns twenty, having lived in Vienna for three years and never made it to the top of the podium, he comes to Rehan’s house. Rehan lives a few stops away from the rink with his wife and three children, and Yuuri feels horrible about how late he’s visiting. Still, he bursts in and says, “I need to coordinate my own programs. I want to speak to people about music. I don’t know. Maybe everything will turn out even worse, but. I need this. What do you think, Rehan?”

Yuuri’s coach pulls Yuuri into his arms, eyes sparkling. “That’s it, Yuuri. If that’s what you need to do, you have my full support. We’ll build the program that’s been missing in your life.”

After Rehan’s wife comes downstairs and shushes the two men, Yuuri scurries off to his apartment, a fresh sense of elation washing over him.

Yuuri spends the off-season getting prepared. He qualifies for the Olympic team at age twenty-one, and takes the world by storm. “Gold! Gold, gold! Katsuki has shown his dominance as Japan’s top skater here in 2014!! He set the world record for his SP in his senior debut, and broke the world record with his FS score!”

Rehan cheers Yuuri on to victory, but the buzzes of the press and the weight of gold on his chest leave him floating along in space.

He dreamily recounts the journey to newscasters, Rehan patting his back and cheering every few words. Yuuri’s knees are still wobbly as the medaling ceremony comes to a close.

But that isn’t the end, of course. Rehan asks if Yuuri still wants to compete on the regular circuit, to which Yuuri dazedly remarks that he’d like to, if Rehan thinks he’s up to it.

Rehan says, “Yuuri, you won everything you could compete in at the Olympics. Of course I think you’re up for it.”

That same year, continuing his late-start medaling career, Yuuri climbs to the top at the Grand Prix.

Yuuri gasps for air, clinging to his coach like he’s a lifeline.

“You did it,” the older man tells him, crying together with his star pupil. “You made it to the top, Yuuri. It’s been a long time coming.”

Yuuri sobs and nods, head still full of tumbling thoughts.

The big question is, then - what comes next?

Yuuri spends his summers with his parents and the rest of the year with Rehan. He holds many interviews at the inn, both to increase interest in tourism and to see his family. By the time he’s twenty-three, Yuuri is is feeling a little stagnant.

His poodle isn’t feeling well, and it makes him depressed, so he holes himself inside when he’s not doing conditioning and practice. The new Nishigori family stops by and Yuuri makes pleasantries, but he doesn’t have much to talk about. They have children. He lives under public scrutiny as an athlete.

The new season starts soon, and he’s just. Tired.

Rehan sends him an email.

Maybe you should start this season somewhere new. I won’t be offended. Sometimes, having the same coach forever can be draining. I have a friend in Detroit who’ll be able to take care of you, if you want to check his rink out?

Yuuri is a loyal person by nature, and he’s not very interested in switching coaches, but he does feel drained. He sends coach Celestino Cialdini a quick message. The man of Italian descent gets back to Yuuri fairly quickly, which makes the skater nervous.

Yuuri,

You’re always welcome in Detroit. I usually encourage my skaters to stay with each other for cheap rent and team-building, but it’s not required.

We have two rooms available close to my rink.

Give me a ring if you ever decide to visit.

-CC

Yuuri’s dog Kino dies that summer, and he flies to Detroit to escape his misery.

Phichit Chulanont turns out to be a pretty good roommate. Given that Yuuri bursts into tears as soon as he gets his bags in the room, babbling things in hodgepodge English, the younger man handles the sudden breakdown pretty well. Phichit rubs a hand over the older man’s back while he sobs, unsure of what he should say.

“You okay, buddy?” Phichit’s voice is soft and soothing while Yuuri shakes his head.

Once he pulls himself together, the older man is horribly embarrassed. His face is red, his eyes puffy, and Yuuri sniffles, saying, “This is a pretty horrible way to start our term as roommates, huh?”

Phichit laughs, toying with his fringe. “I don’t know. I think this is a good way for us to get to know each other. Just so you know, I cry every time talks about animal abuse and when my relatives talk about their favorite soap operas, so you’ll get the chance to make it up to me pretty soon.”

Yuuri barks out a laugh.

From this interaction alone, the two of them of them get the sense that they’re going to be great friends.

Celestino isn’t so much a taskmaster as somebody that acts like his skaters’ cool uncle. He keeps an eye on all his rink students, but especially on Phichit, who is just getting ready to make it big in the Senior leagues.

Phichit is naturally charismatic, and seeing him try his best to bring cheer to everyone, to showcase his talent and live for his country’s pride - it fuels Yuuri. He wants to be the kind of friend that Phichit can look up to, figuratively speaking.

Yuuri also wants to show his pride as the defender of the throne of men’s figure skating. He integrates harder elements into his routine, pushing the limits of what should possible for an athlete his age. He pushes through his inner panic, through the long, anxious nights where he wants to binge eat with Phichit, and nights where all he wants to do is scream.

He brushes his tears away, bandages his feet, and wipes his sweat while Celestino yells things to help Yuuri focus on getting his balance right, on landing every quad, on sweeping his arms at the correct angles.

Phichit refuses to give up when he sees Yuuri’s program coming together. He wants to stand on the podium just as much as Yuuri does, and he’s not afraid to work for it either.

That year, at the Grand Prix, Yuuri comes in first yet again, and Phichit just barely misses the stand.

When they see each other afterwards, Phichit is crying happy tears. Yuuri pats his shoulder and says, “Wanna give up?”

Phichit sniffles, scoffs, and pulls his friend into a hug. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

Yuuri pats his back, exhaling in relief while he holds Phichit close. “That’s what I wanted to hear.”

When Yuuri is twenty-five, Phichit has a Grand Prix silver medal clutched in his hands.

He’s crying, and Chris, who holds bronze, looks proud of himself.

The champion of the event wonders where moments like that have gone. Yuuri looks down at gold and feels nothing. He’s been winning gold medals for a long time.

Perhaps too long. Phichit makes a V for the cameras, hot tears streaming down his cheeks. All he’s ever wanted was to show all of Thailand his skill, to encourage skating prowess in a country that isn’t well-known for that. He’s told Yuuri over and over again that gold is best, but doing what he loves, showing people he loves what he does - that’s what he competes for.

Phichit is an uplifting roommate and a good influence on Yuuri, but the flash of cameras in his eyes is blinding, and as he adjusts his glasses, smiling for yet another interview, he realizes that he’s become numb to all of it.

Yuuri is terrified.

By the time Victor bumbles into Yuuri’s life, the older man just feels drained, generally.

Skating is infuriating, but Yuuri doesn’t know what else to do. He’s starting to run out of routines, and he’s getting too damn old to keep up with all the kids coming out of the Junior circuit.

He’s numb to everything. His smiles are hollow, and he plays nice with the media and his overwhelming legion of fans.

Yuuri has heard of Victor Nikiforov, even before he’d offered to take a photo with him. He’s a very handsome man, three years his junior, and with a tangled mess of hair flopping over clear blue eyes, but he looks just as lost as Yuuri does. The older skater offers and Victor, unlike most of Yuuri’s outspoken fans, flees from sight immediately.

The older skater thinks about it for ages until they meet again.

That banquet makes Yuuri realize that he hadn’t really been doing other than skating for years.

He doesn’t have many friends now - really, he’s only close to Phichit and Yuuko, these days. Chris is a good acquaintance to chat with if he needs to speak with someone quickly on Instagram or Twitter.

Victor reminds him that Yuuri is only twenty-seven. He’s full of life, even though he’s upset about coming in last at the Grand Prix final. Victor is shameless and it feels like he sees right through Yuuri.

Yuuri is too cynical to call himself smitten, but Victor does wear a flush very well, and Yuuri is beyond flattered to hear that Victor wants him to be his coach.

For the next few months, he lives in a state of confusion. Skating with Celestino occupies most of his work time, and his off-hours are spent bumming around the city with Phichit. He’s never sure how seriously he should have taken Victor’s words in Sochi.

Phichit eventually elbows his friend in the side. “So, whatever happened to lover boy?”

Yuuri suspects that Victor Nikiforov has forgotten all about their meeting under the influence of alcohol.

That’s fine. Yuuri shrugs and smiles vacantly up at his taller friend. “Mm. It was just a passing thing.”

Phichit gives him a wilting look. “You sure about that? I’ve seen your Twitter. It’s full of likes for Victor’s tweets.”

Yuuri slaps Phichit on the arm. “Stop ghosting me!! Is nothing sacred in this world?”

“Between the two of us?” Phichit rolls his eyes. “Absolutely not. You’re crushing hard, and as your best friend, I reserve the right to poke fun at you for being hilarious and adorable. It’s kind of nice to see you invested in anything, you know? Feels like some spark came back to your eyes.”

The words catch him off-guard.

Yuuri hadn’t known he’d seemed that elated when he had looked up more information about the man who’d come in last place at the Grand Prix.

It makes him wonder just how people see him now, when he flies home for nationals, thoughts about Victor Nikiforov warm on his legs at the banquet. Yuuri’s traveled lots of places and won lots of medals, but in recent years, none of them have felt quite so tangible as the Russian skater breathing hot over him, silvery hair falling in his eyes.

Winning the Japanese Nationals is not a breeze so much as it is expected of Yuuri, and when the season comes to a close and a video gets sent his way, Yuuri takes it as a sign.

He smiles softly as he presses play, and figures out how best to contact his admirer.

Perhaps he’ll feel that spark with Victor that Phichit had mentioned once more.

#mod: ash #yoi #yuri on ice #txt #reverse fic

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luckykhuxguide · 7 years

Note

Have you found a lot of resistance or ire pointed at you for encouraging people to play JP? I find that there's a good amount of people who insist JPUX is "easy mode" and I've even been called a shill for pointing out how different the two servers are in an effort to teach others how the NA playerbase isn't treated fairly. It's made me want to leave the NA experience entirely...

(*´◒`*) Hi Anon!

This really depends on the people you’re around. I’m going to put our replies under a read more (so click on the question) since I’ve a lot (I wrote way too much so I apologize for the wall) to say regarding this, and Lucky probably has some things to add as well.

I’ve been met with healthy skepticism, which is perfectly fine. After all, I AM biased. You shouldn’t just believe everything everyone says, and always think for yourself.

I did try to convince my friend (IRL) to play JP KHUX, because she loved playing NA KHUX. At first she said no because she didn’t want to fall into KHUX hell like me, but after I told her how different JP KHUX and NA KHUX was treated, she did join! :> She said she enjoys JP KHUX a whole lot more than NA KHUX and stopped playing NA KHUX.

~ Lucky ★彡

We try to state hard facts in addition to our own experiences and there’s plenty of those. We’ve listed differences in play, treatment, jewels, bonuses, events and handling before. The reasons we list as PSA or when people ask for differences/reasons to migrate are to make people aware. After that, it’s up to them what they want to do with the information.

I’m guilting of urging NA KHUX players to play JP KHUX though. =w=;; When they come and rant to me on this blog, there is nothing I can do but tell them to play JP KHUX if they enjoy the game play but couldn’t handle the way NA KHUX were being treated. Honestly, I wouldn’t have much of a problem with playing NA KHUX if NA KHUX were treated the same way as JP KHUX. But all I can do is to advice them to change. Whether they take action or not is ultimately up to them. I’ve done all I can do urge them, but the choice is their’s to make.

~ Lucky ★彡

While it’s sweet of you to make them aware of the differences (and suggest they try JP KHUX), a lot of people have trouble with language barriers or straightup abandoning their account. Personal reasons also apply. This is completely understandable, and we do encourage to read up on the plot of KHUX through either the global version or youtube videos/translations if they try JP KHUX.

I’ve always found it a bit difficult to recommend KHUX JP, especially at first. I got better at reading Japanese through it, but I’m definitely among the select few of intl players who can read Japanese. The more feedback I got from happy migrated players, the more confident I got with recommending the JP server to others (using quotes and numbers to back my claims more in addition to the facts and my own experiences). Obviously I still put a disclaimer; part of my experience differs, since I don’t need to look things up. This makes me a faster player and enables me to enjoy the story. Heck, my own party members read either no Japanese at all, or picked up some keywords for when I’m not around. And even they enjoy the game a ton. In both versions, being part of a good party can make such a difference…I’m trailing off.

Okay on my part, I’ve never understood the plot for KH games. I just know that my goal is to kill whatever I see really. There is too much in-between cut scenes that you forget why you’re doing it in the first place. So, the same happened for me with KHUX. I just kill whatever I see and complete missions. I didn’t REALLY care for the story because I’m so lost with the KH plot already and I couldn’t figure out why KHUX is so important to the KH plot aside from the keyblade war. (We’re going to be dead kids.)

~ Lucky ★彡

NA KHUX is the way it is, and probably won’t change much due to the amount of players still dishing hefty sums of money out. The resistance you’ve been seeing is part of that problem. Calling JP KHUX ‘easy mode’ is a new one to me, and makes me think that’s what they call it to make themselves feel better about it. So long they’re enjoying the game, that’s fine with me, though.

I can understand why NA KHUX players call JP KHUX easy mode, and they’re not wrong to call JP KHUX “easy mode”. Especially going from JP KHUX to NA KHUX, my JP KHUX account is GODLY compared to NA KHUX. The enemies I fight in JP KHUX die easily with a single guilted premium, yet I’m suffering in NA KHUX even using an entire deck. You do have to strategize differently in NA KHUX than you do in JP KHUX, such as giving good skills (i.e. SP+&Atk boost 3, or Lux+&Atk Boost 2) to guilted non-premiums, because chances for f2p to guilt premiums is rather impossible.

And, TBH, because JP KHUX are so strong now, we can easily solo Raid Bosses even at level 99 (no joke guys, we can bring in like 5 million lux in one fight against a lvl 99 RB). It used to be more fun when the entire party coordinated together to kill a raid boss because we really needed to work together to defeat the raid boss and bring the raid boss to level 99. Someone needed to be a summoner and everyone else participated in killing the raid boss. Now, it is just us soloing the raid bosses. Yes, we need to work together as a party to rank well party wise, but it’s not the same... There is something fun and satisfying knowing your party members rely on each other to help each other out, and being too strong with the RBs took that aspect away.

Square KINDA brought back the “work together as a party” aspect by giving up 101 Dalmatian hell in JP KHUX, but it is only temporary. I do hope multi-player will allow us to work together again in a party.

~ Lucky ★彡

I do not advertise JP KHUX actively. I recommend it casually when I see players struggling on global, or when they approach me about it.

I’ve seen JP KHUX players obnoxiously advertise (under SENA KHUX tweets, for example) that NA players should just join JP, that JP is better, that NA is being ridiculous.

IDK, I DO THINK NA KHUX IS RIDICULOUS THOUGH. I mean the requirement to get a commemorative medal requires NA KHUX players to have them guilted?! LIKE SERIOUSLY? If the new premiums are guaranteed to come with 3 dots. FINE. So we need to make at most 10 draws to be qualified to get the premium and NA KHUX f2p players can do that. But asking us to get SEVEN COPIES of a premium so we can have it GUILTED by a CLOSE DEADLINE TO THE RELEASE DATE is ridiculous!! No way can ANY f2p or c2p players can obtain these commemorative medals. Or if Square keeps the requirement in order to obtain the commemorative medals you need so and so premiums guilted, but no deadline, is okay too because f2p players can EVENTUALLY get the commemorative medal. But Square is expecting NA KHUX to have premiums guilted by such a close deadline to the release date is similar, if not the same, as the JP KHUX standard. While it is difficult for f2p JP KHUX players to obtain a commemorative medal, it is not impossible. Honestly though, they should’ve kept the requirement to obtain the commemorative medal as obtaining the premium by a deadline.

And don’t get me started on the lack of special VIP missions available every week and lack of guilt bonus events. IT WOULDN’T HURT TO GIVE US MORE GUILT BONUS CAMPAIGNS. JUST SAYIN’ SQUARE. GIVE US MORE GUILT BONUS CAMPAIGNS.

~ Lucky ★彡

To me, that’s JUST as annoying as NA players calling JP easy mode or calling players who migrate “traitors” or “weak”.

OH SNAP. I DIDN’T KNOW NA KHUX PLAYERS CALLED THOSE WHO SWITCH TO JP KHUX PLAYERS NAMES. I mean yeah, NA KHUX players would feel like they’re being betrayed, but it’s not like everyone is willing to have their wallets go on a diet for NA KHUX, or have access to the google survey to get free money and offer that as sacrifice to NA KHUX.

~ Lucky ★彡

Nobody has the right to ruin another player’s experience. You do whatever leyts you have most fun. It’s fine to call SENA out for being unfair, but be specific, be factual, and be articulate.

There’s NA players who will call you a shill for advertising JP KHUX. There’s NA players who will stick with NA regardless of what anyone says. There’s also JP players who feel overly sorry for NA players or will think highly of themselves for having made the switch to JP. There’s annoying/obnoxious players in both versions of the game, because we’re all just players looking for a fun experience. And players are humans, so there’s always going to be ones you don’t get along with. But there’s also those you’ll be able to befriend.

In the end though, it’s not your responsibility. If they’re having fun as is, or don’t feel like giving JP KHUX a shot, that’s their own decision. If it really starts causing you grief, remember it’s not your responsibility to persuade them or make them aware. In fact, if you’re actively persuading, I recommend you to not do so. It’s a lot of wasted energy, and if they resist, it’ll make their game experience less fun to be (constantly) reminded of the differences, too.

If they’re having fun, and you’re having fun on your own, then that’s perfectly fine the way it is.

If they don’t want to try/play JP KHUX even after knowing the differences, there’s little anyone can do about it, and it’s their choice.

There’s a whole lot more I could say about this, but I’ll stop here.

I don’t know if you just point it out, or if you’re actively persuading, or if you’re part of the group who’s actively advertising.

I don’t mind what you choose to do, that’s your responsibility too.

But you did hint that the feedback you got impacted you negatively, which means you’ll want to rethink your actions– not because you have been wrong (or depending on how you went about it, maybe you approach was, I cannot say) but because your advice has been ignored or you’ve been called out for advertising.

( I’m aware that my phrasing may give you the wrong idea, so I’ll repeat: I’m not making assumptions about you. This is why I include multiple scenarios. I don’t know what type of person you are or how you tried to approach those players. You know who you are and how you approached them, so you know exactly how it went. You don’t owe me that explanation and I don’t need you do go into detail– you can figure out where to go from here. But again, my advice in a tldr: if it causes you so much grief and frustration, maybe it’s better to focus on having fun and being a bit more picky with who you try to help out. )

–Salt

#anonymous #opinion #salt takeover #khux #na khux #jp khux #Anonymous #Question #Lucky ★彡 #Salt did a good job writing this! :>

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wanderingaunt · 4 years

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My Surrender Experiment: 30 Blogs in 30(ish) Days

"No matter who we are, life is going to put us through the changes that we need to go through. The question is, “Are we willing to use this force for our transformation? Even intense situations don’t have to leave psychological scars if we are willing to process our changes at a deeper level. Deeply honor the transformative power of life." -- Michael Singer, The Surrender Experiment

What is your mountain?

This is the question that beckoned my attention while I was climbing an actual mountain. Early on the morning of June 30, I woke with the clear knowing that I needed to go on a hike, and not just any hike, one that would challenge me. I followed this urge and headed to Mount Garfield. I had no idea that this hike—this climb—would lead me to writing 30 blogs in 30-ish days. After I climbed the mountain, I knew I needed my own challenge. After I returned from my climb, I walked the labyrinth at Six Eagles Haven and asked the question, “What IS my mountain?”

The answer was clear: Write 30 blogs in 30 days.

Well, it’s been 35 days since I embarked on this journey, so not quite 30 days, but I’ll take it. When you climb a mountain there will be detours and obstacles that get in your way. In the past, I would’ve pushed myself to complete a blog each day no matter what the cost. While I did have many occasions of finishing a blog at 2:00 and 3:00 in the morning, I had other occasions where I tuned in and listened to what my body needed. I surrendered to the process and trusted that the mini breaks in between would allow me to restore and replenish.

This blog challenge was My Surrender Experiment.

On my drive back to Dallas after being in Colorado for a month, I listened to the audiobook, The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer. This book has been recommended to me by many people over the years. And while in Colorado, I met a woman who shared with me her life changing experience from reading this book. I had read Michael Singer’s book The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself a couple of years ago and knew the power of his work. So I knew I was ready for The Surrender Experiment.

Side note: If you’ve never read The Untethered Soul, start here. It truly is life-changing and guides you through detaching the thoughts in your head to discovering inner peace and serenity. It’s wildly powerful.

I spent the first 8 hours of my drive consumed with listening to Michael Singer read about his own Surrender Experiment. In the book, Michael (or Mickey as friends call him) so eloquently shares his life journey of surrender. He began meditation and playing with the idea of surrender in his later 20s. What started as an inquiry for Michael to go inward, shifted to the building of a community and Temple (Temple of the Universe) and the making of a billion dollar medical software company. Michael chose to live a life in full surrender of the Universe. Rather than fighting change or opportunity, he chose to surrender and be the conduit for its purpose.

This book was so profound for me. It caused me to look at my life and notice where I surrender vs. where I hold onto control. The times I do surrender are so fruitful and awe-inspiring. My solo travel journey and photoshoot mission is a beautiful example of surrender. Life flows so effortlessly when I’m in this space. I show up, trust the place to tell me where to go and follow its lead. I always end up meeting the right people, finding the right places to stay, and the most gorgeous outfits to wear (in my photoshoots).

When it comes to other areas of my life, however, I don’t so easily let go of control.

Take this blog challenge for example. I got the hit for this challenge on July 1. It took me 3 weeks to actually lean in and get started. I fought with resistance, procrastination, and the dangerous, “I’ll start tomorrow.” When I finally chose to let go of control and surrender to this challenge, I showed up and wrote the first post. I chose Surrender to be the vehicle to carry me through this challenge. When resistance showed up, I leaned into it and surrendered. When perfectionism would beckon me at each word I wrote, I would surrender and ask for support in allowing flow to come in. When exhaustion hit and I’d try to force myself to keep writing at 2 AM, I would shut my laptop, turn off the light and surrender to sleep. I chose to let go of force and allow the process to unfold naturally.

Every journey begins with a single step.

Today while I was reflecting on the completion of this challenge, I pulled the card ‘Every Journey Starts with a Single Step’ from my Sacred Rebels Oracle deck. The message was the most beautiful compliment to this challenge:

You are on a journey. Yes, it is an internal journey but there is also a physical expression of this journey that is going to become increasingly important to the fulfillment of your destiny in this lifetime. Your journey has started on the inside but its destination will be the physical expression of an internal healing. This journey will draw upon what you have learned and mastered over the course of your life—so much so, that you may feel as though your life experiences have prepared you just for this particular adventure.

You see, this journey is a spiritual gift. It is an invitation from the great loving heart of the universe, calling you into something that you would not have otherwise found. You are not supposed to know all the details, nor how it is going to work out, before you set out. You are just meant to take one step after the other. Again. And again. So that you can receive the gifts that are headed your way.

This oracle brings you particular guidance that the apparently small steps you are taking in an area of your life, important to you right now, are actually far more powerful and constructive than you realize. Sometimes we are gaining ground but the effect is not immediately obvious. This doesn’t mean that nothing is happening. It simply means that the effects of your actions are cumulative and soon they will begin to overflow into the physical world with a positive impact that may surprise you. Your inner and outer journeys are blessed with positive energy and all you need to do is keep going—one step at a time.

This Journey, this Challenge, this Surrender Experiment has been the most beautiful spiritual gift I could have received. I had no idea where this blog challenge was going to lead when I started. I trusted that I was being guided to take on this challenge for a reason. As I write my final post in this challenge, I am filled with so much gratitude, awe, and amazement. This blog challenge transformed my life. It caused me to show up for myself in ways I haven’t before—to tune in, trust the words to come, and allow myself to be seen through writing. I let go of old hurts and found deep healing within. I gained so much confidence and appreciation for who I am for myself and the world. I let go of the need to be accepted by others and instead chose to accept myself fully. I gave myself permission to be my most beautiful, authentic self. I found peace, acceptance, and love for myself and my journey.

I am so damn proud of myself for surrendering to this challenge.

What started as a nudge to climb a mountain, led me to identifying my mountain and taking the first step. Now that I’ve reached the top of this mountain, I can see more mountains in the distance. I believe I have it within me to keep climbing. For now though, I’m going to take a break and CELEBRATE THIS MOUNTAIN!

“Of my own free will, I now choose to surrender any fear or doubt about my ability to succeed. I believe in myself. I trust myself. I have faith in the unfolding journeys of my life, both internally and out in the world. Even in the face of the unknown, I know that positive energy surrounds me and I am protected. Through unconditional love, I am supported and assisted to take each step, as needs be, so that my great, creative, life journey can be all that it can be.” — With Gratitude, Sacred Rebel

Do you have a mountain that you’ve been wanting to climb and don’t know how to get started? Or do you find yourself saying again and again that you’ll start tomorrow? You do not have to be alone in your quest. Reach out and let’s uncover any blocks or obstacles that may be standing in the way from you taking the first step.

#climbing mountains #surrender #Challenge #writing #journey

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