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bettyfrommars · 4 months

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I'm on Fire

chapter 18: the ties that bind

masterlist playlist

18+ MDNI

If you've come this far in the series, you know what to expect. No physical violence in this final chapter, but there might be some jealousy, protective/jealous Eddie, and threats. Steve with an OC character, parental Stobin, unprotected sex, oral, and meeting the extended family. Can't say goodby without a glimpse of Charlene. Reader is an artist and a vegetarian, but I try hard to keep away from any physical description.

word count: 15k

official author's note will be at the end of this chapter. I cherish you, my I'm on Fire fam, I'm so grateful for the ride, and I hope you enjoy this one.

"It's a long dark highway and a thin white line Connecting baby, your heart to mine."

-- the ties that bind, Bruce Springsteen

The next morning, a new Henderson opened her eyes to the world.

Steve was the next one to hold her after her parents, and he hadn’t expected to cry, to have his throat close up around his emotions and choke him when he was told they named her Stevie. He held her so close but so gentle and he barely noticed how wet his cheeks were until Robin came close and rubbed her palm in circles on his back.

“She kinda looks like me. That’s weird right?” Steve hushed, voice catching in a tearful hiccup. He was already thinking of the tattoo he would get with her name, inside his arm, close to his heart.

“Yeah, that is weird and impossible, Dingus,” Robin smiled into his shoulder, stroking a loving arc over Stevie’s little infant forehead with her finger. “But she kinda does.”

The labor had been long, the sun was up, and everyone was exhausted. Astrid was at the house making breakfast while you and Eddie looked after Oliver. He insisted on watching Pee-Wee Herman's Big Adventure again, and that was when you learned it was one of Eddie’s favorites as well; he knew every line by heart. He mimicked Ollie with the chant, “I know you are but what am I, I know you are but what am I?”

And it was only then that you realized why Eddie had made a joke once about violently cutting off your mattress tag, the one that specifically said DO NOT REMOVE. Also, it explained why Steve so ardently wanted to start his own biker gang called Satan’s Helpers.

After breakfast, Eddie took you back to the Hammer to get your car, and even though you didn’t want to socialize, you were also in no mood to be stranded at your place without wheels. Jackie reminded you that you looked like shit on your way through the smoky haze from the late morning drinkers. You simply nodded in silent agreement, and it wasn’t so much a nod as your head lazily bobbing on a spring. Your internal clock was out of whack, and you desperately needed a shower. A shower and a soak in the healing waters of some type of magical pond that could heal you from the inside out.

Maybe a month on a beach somewhere.

And then you pictured Eddie in a pair of loud, tropical swim trunks and giggled to yourself.

You were just about to leave the locker room with your paycheck and a few of your things, when tall, blonde Erika pushed in with a concerned look on her face, making you back up. She shut the door behind her and leaned against it, covering the “Safety in the Workplace” poster.

“Hey, so, that guy is here looking for you again,” her whisper was urgent.

Your heart sank for a second as the memory of Craig gripped you. You had to remind yourself that he was long gone.

But you wondered if a part of him would always be lurking somewhere near, haunting you from beyond the grave.

Your next guess was Chief Hopper, maybe he had more questions for you.

“What guy?” You were hoping she had a clue, or asked a name, so that you could prepare yourself, doing your best to smooth out the front of your shirt.

She only shrugged. “He’s older, Paul Newman type. Smells like he’s made of money. This is the third time he’s been here asking about you.”

It still didn’t ring any bells, but you’d only slept a half hour on the couch curled up next to Eddie while Pee-Wee stormed the Alamo looking for his bike.

You took a slow peek around the corner of the bar from the hallway and saw John Gregson sitting there with a drink in his hand. Full head of salt n’ pepper hair slicked back off his face, wearing one of his signature gray suits.

Was he by himself? The way Charlene had been popping up like a bad rash lately, you almost expected to see her there, playing the dutiful wife.

You hid yourself in the hallway again, wondering if you had it in you to have a conversation with anyone, let alone him.

To say his face “lit up” when he saw you would be an understatement; He looked as if you’d been pulled from the rubble of a burning building, and he thought he would never see you again.

You found it hard to match the enthusiasm, even though he’d turned out to be a decent guy.

He stood up from his stool and Shana gave you both a curious look from behind the bar as she poured a shaken martini into a glass. She was wearing one of her long, black wigs that day with Bettie Page bangs.

“It’s good to see you,” he gestured to the seat next to him, his icy blue eyes shone like the Mediterranean Sea. “It’s been a while.”

You sank one hip onto the padded stool so that one foot was still on the ground. You didn’t want him to think you were staying for too long.

“I’m sorry I’m so behind on your painting, life has been—”

He put his hand up, palm out to you. It was his left hand and you noticed that he was not wearing his wedding ring.

“Please, don’t worry about the painting. Take all the time you need, that’s not why I’m here. Can I buy you lunch?”

“I-I…” you fumbled. “I was just on my way out.”

“A drink then?” He cleared his throat and shifted closer casually so that his knee was touching yours. He swirled his drink in his hand. “There’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about and I didn’t feel it was appropriate to do it over the phone.”

Your anxiety spiked a bit, and it wasn’t as if he was a serial killer or anything, but his sudden shift in proximity gave you pause. You asked Shana for an iced tea and gestured for him to follow you to one of the more isolated tables against the dark red wall, underneath a framed Led Zeppelin poster. He pulled your chair out for you before getting settled with his gin and tonic, making sure to use one of the black cocktail napkins as a coaster.

“I know you’re busy,” he cleared his throat. “So, permit me to get right to the point.” He removed the two stir straws from his drink and put them on the napkin.

“First of all, I’d like to apologize for my wife. I believe she’s caused you quite a bit of trouble.”

You had not expected that one

His stare was too intense, you had to shift your attention and take a gulp of your drink.

“You see,” he settled back, keeping his forearms on the table. “I met Charlene when I was barely out of high school, we were together before I made my money, and I always felt like I owed her my blind devotion. Lately it’s obvious that we only make each other miserable.”

He continued. “I’m not a stupid man. I always knew about the other boyfriends, not that she made much of an effort to hide it,” he smiled wryly to himself. “Not to bore you with the details of my failed marriage, but I know that Charlene’s the reason you lost your job at the gallery, and I’d like to rectify that, if I can.”

Realization dawned at his words. Why hadn’t you put those pieces together earlier? Of course Charlene was the reason you lost your job, she probably threatened to remove her funding and ruin Judith.

You could barely catch up to what he was saying before he started again. “I’m opening a gallery in Chicago, and I’d like you to come out and run it.”

You choked and had to cover your mouth with the back of your hand. “Excuse me?”

John smiled so genuinely at your reaction that the skin around his eyes crinkled. He undid a button on his suit jacket to get more comfortable. “You’d have full creative license, you’d be able to hire your team, do with it what you wish. I trust your vision.”

It was that opportunity you’d been dreaming about for years, the one you’d been working toward for almost a decade.

So easy, just like that.

Here, take it, it’s everything you’ve ever wanted.

…but was it?

Your head swam, vision tunneling slightly as you glanced around the Velvet Hammer. You imagined Steve on his stool at the door and Eddie pulling you aside in the hallway to kiss you. The song Everlong by The Foo Fighters was on, and you thought about how Chicago was over three hours away. You’d have to move; it was much too far for a commute.

“That’s such a generous offer, I…I don’t know what to say?”

“You don’t have to say anything right now,” and before you knew what was happening, his hand slid across the table and was on top of your fingers.

Your eyes flashed to his hand over yours and you sat there shocked while your need to be polite overrode your core instincts.

“I know there’s a lot to think about,” he continued, removing his hand to cup it around his drink again. “Of course, I’d pay for all of your moving expenses. I own a building downtown with an artist loft I think you might be interested in. You’d have plenty of room to live and paint, start fresh, if you wanted to.”

Start fresh.

You felt like Shana had slipped a psychedelic into your tea, like you were melting into your chair. Your brain was having a hard time keeping up with the reality of what was being offered.

He tossed back another sip and wiped the corners of his mouth, looking almost unsure if he should say the next part. “Charlene and I—” he licked his perfectly straight teeth in contemplation. “---we’ve decided to go our separate ways. We’re selling the lake house, a few other properties, and she’s planning to move to Hawaii to be near her sister.”

A thought zipped through your mind then. How long had Charlene known she was leaving? Why would she become a partner in The Velvet Hammer and then move to Hawaii?

“That means I’ll be at my condo in Chicago most of the time, unless I’m traveling for business,” he gave you a pointed look again. “There are so many places I’d love to take you to in the city. If you are interested, that is.”

“Well,” you laughed nervously. “I’d need to talk to my boyfriend about it. About the job, I mean. Moving to Chicago. His whole life is here.”

“Certainly,” John nodded, not missing a beat. “You talk to him and when you’re ready, you have my number. The gallery space I’m buying needs work, so I’d like to fly you out there in a week to take a look at it, once you decide.”

You were still staring glassy eyed at the edge of the table after John stood and left the Hammer. You hadn’t remembered to breathe in god knew how long, so you tried that, letting out a hard exhale that made a cocktail napkin go flying off the table.

Would Eddie move with you? Visit you on the weekends? The latter seemed more likely but also not, considering how demanding his work schedule was. Katie told you that Robin had asked her to move in, and you were overjoyed for her. She’d be paying her share of the rent and utilities for the next month, but after that you’d either need to find a smaller place or a new roommate because you couldn’t afford your duplex on a Velvet Hammer salary.

One week was all you had.

Did you even need a week? Surely you knew your answer.

—-------

The tires on the tow truck screeched to a stuttering halt out on a Hawkins back road lined with cornfields.

Behind the wheel, Eddie idled there, right in front of that familiar white picket fence around the big yard and the farmhouse with a porch swing and a red barn in back.

Eddie knew the details of the old Ferguson place by heart, it had been his dream house ever since he was in high school and used to take long rides on his bike to clear his head. The couple that had spent their life raising a family there were in their 80’s now, and he’d heard through the grapevine that they were relocating to a retirement community. To a smaller place that was easier to care for. All of their children were grown and lived far away.

The newest addition to the house was where his eyes fell.

His attention fixed on the sign at the end of the driveway for a long while, heart thudding in his chest.

The old Ferguson Farmhouse was for sale.

—---

The next day was the Welcome Home Baby Stevie barbeque at Steve’s and he had a blue “Kiss the Cook” apron on and a spatula in his bandaged hand when you and Eddie arrived. He wore an elastic bracelet made of colorful plastic beads around his wrist that you assumed was a new gift from Oliver. The sky was bright blue, almost blinding, and the air was crisp.

“You sure you’re okay?” Eddie asked on the way up the driveway to Robin and Steve’s backyard where the lawn had been neatly mowed and edged. “Anything you want to talk about?”

You hated keeping things from him, but you had no idea how to bring up John’s offer, or if you even wanted to mention it. Eddie had invited you over to his place the night before, but you’d told him you needed some time alone to get to bed early. Turns out that being alone with your thoughts only made it worse.

“No, I’m fine my love, I promise,” you leaned into him. “I’m just tired.”

He put his arm around your shoulders to scoop you closer and kiss your ear. “I’m gonna take care of you tonight. Make you a bath, pour you some wine, kiss you all over. How does that sound?”

“It sounds—” you felt emotions water your eyes suddenly and you blinked it away as quickly as you could. “That sounds perfect.”

You felt guilty that you were even considering John’s offer, but how could you not? A very hopeful part of you said that both were a possibility, that you could keep Eddie and have your dream job in the city. But how? You couldn’t take Eddie away from Wayne and Oliver and his business, you would never ask that of him.

“Is Wayne coming?” You asked, noticing you did not see his truck. Also, your thoughts were racing again and you needed a distraction.

“He’ll be here later,” Eddie assured you. “Astrid is picking him up on her way over. Max and Lucas stopped by the garage for a visit and I didn’t want to disrupt the reunion.”

You felt a bit embarrassed at the mention of his longtime friend Max, only because you’d been made to believe that she was a mysterious redhead that Eddie was having an affair with not too long ago.

Thanks to Charlene.

You imagined that Hawkins would be a much better place without her lurking around every corner. Was there a chance that Judith would take you back on at Moon River Gallery? No, you had no desire to go crawling back to that place. Unless a new gallery opened, or your art took off to celebrity status, you’d be waitressing at the Hammer and squirreling away your tips for the foreseeable future.

But, you’d have Eddie.

You’d been spacing out so hard, you barely realized that Robin was standing in front of you, offering to take the sack with a Tupperware full of homemade potato salad and hamburger buns. Eddie was carrying your veggie burger patties that he bought especially for the occasion, and the fixings to make tofu skewers. You told him you were a vegetarian once, and you never had to remind him again.

“You good?” Robin asked, noting the way you shook your head a few times to come back to reality. Katie came up behind Robin to place her hands on her girlfriend’s hips before she moved over to your side.

“Have a beer with me?” Katie asked softly, reading the weariness in your slightly hunched shoulders.

It was officially fall, but the weather was warm for Indiana in late September. Eddie had on his Iron Maiden concert tee under his jacket from their 1985 World Slavery tour and black converse with his worn jeans, and he took his leather off and threw it on a lawn chair as he walked over to the grill.

“You better leave the hard stuff to me,” he said to Steve, shifting his gaze accusatory to grill. The last time he let Steve grill your veggie burger, he’d charred it within an inch of its life.

“Have at it,” Steve dusted his hands together. “I have to go check on my pie in the oven.”

“You baked a pie?” Eddie gawked at him like he had hornets crawling out of his ears.

“Well, Astrid made it,” he pinched a few sunflower seeds out of the front pocket of his apron and popped them in his mouth, chewing as he spoke. “It’s cherry,” he bobbed his eyebrows up and down a few times suggestively, and Eddie scoffed, elbowing him out of the way so that he could put his skewers down on the folding table.

You were just about to take the first sip of your beer when a man’s voice that was not familiar called over from the driveway.

“There’s that long-haired freak I’ve been looking for.”

The skin on your arms prickled with gooseflesh and you spun around, thinking there was about to be some sort of trouble.

Slightly unrealistic to think the worst, but you were understandably alert.

There at the edge of the lawn stood a tall, handsome guy you’d never laid eyes on before, maybe in his late 20’s, and he had a Coffin Kings cut on that was very similar to the one’s Eddie and Steve wore. At his side, holding his hand was an adorable redhead. Her long hair was pulled through the back of a baseball cap, but you noted that the bright candy color was deeply familiar.

You turned to see Eddie’s reaction like you were watching a tennis match.

“Well, I’ll be damned,” he beamed. “Look what the cat dragged in, "and he stopped what he was doing to make his way over with his arms out and the two hugged, giving each other hearty pats on the back.

“Max!” Robin squealed, practically doing a cartwheel in that direction. You and Katie fell back and stood shoulder to shoulder, watching the group reconnect in a way that was very familial.

Lucas and Max had been together since high school, you learned, and Lucas was a member of the Coffin Kings Indianapolis chapter. The song Love Spreads by The Stone Roses played from Robin's portable boombox on the steps as the new arrivals meandered in to be with the rest of the gang and assimilated with ease.

Eddie rested his hand on your lower back to introduce you, and instead of a handshake, Max went in for a hearty hug, and in your ear, she said, “Eddie loves you so much, I’ve been dying to meet you.”

When she pulled back to meet your eyes, you nodded, swallowing hard. “I’ve heard so much about you,” you told her, and then Max shot a look at Eddie and made a crack about how she hoped it was all good things that you’d heard.

They were even more interested to meet Katie, being that Robin had not been serious about anyone since before Oliver was born. Just then, the Oliver in question came bursting out of the house flying his hot dog bun through the air like a plane, making engine noises.

By the time Dustin and Suzie came by with their new baby, the smell of burgers charring on the grill filled the air and you helped Steve bring some more chairs out to the lawn. Eddie was taking much care to keep your vegetarian stuff away from the meat, and you couldn’t help but notice with deep adoration.

Astrid had a lot on her mind. So much so that she didn’t have it in her to make the usual banter with Wayne that she enjoyed when they were together.

“You okay, darlin’?” Wayne turned to her in the truck on the way over.

“Oh,” she tucked a thick swatch of dark hair behind her ear. “You know, just thinking about how excited Steve must be about the new baby.”

There was a distinct melancholy in her voice. One of the reasons the relationship between her and Steve had never gone any further than besties who make love was her refusal to take away his chance at a big family. She was barely 21 when a doctor told her she’d never be able to conceive. Well, technically he said there was a small chance—a hairline percentage—but that it “would take an actual miracle”---those were his words.

She loved Steve too much to not let him be a dad. He was made for that life. Ever since he was a teenager, he’d known he wanted to be a father, and once he had Oliver, she knew she’d done the right thing. She’d tried to keep their relationship platonic time and time again, but in the end, the chemistry between them always proved to be too strong.

She’d decided that she would love him until he found someone else, and then she would continue to love him from the shadows. She’d given her heart long ago, and with him it would stay.

“Hell, look at the head of hair on that kid,” Wayne said when Suzie introduced him to her daughter. He gave a crooked grin and stroked a finger along the back of her tiny, exposed hand.

At that, Dustin took his cap off and swiped a hand through his unruly mane. “Thank god the rest of her looks take after her mother.”

“My thoughts exactly,” Lucas grumbled, thumping his friend in the arm.

Steve had his back to the crowd when they came in and Astrid spanked him on the bum on her way up the stairs to the kitchen.

He spun on his heel and was quick to cage his arms around her so she could only squirm. His face was flushed and glowing. “You meet the kid?”

“I did,” normally, she would’ve kissed him, but instead she pulled back a bit, tilting her chin away. “She’s so beautiful, Steve.”

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I—” she knew she was a fool to think he wouldn’t be able to read her face, a fool to think he couldn’t read her like a book after all of those years.

Steve frowned, examining her face for a clue to her distress.

Astrid’s stomach felt like she’d swallowed a lead weight.

She hadn’t decided if she should tell him or not.

About the secret she’d been carrying with her for a few days.

15 years, that’s how long she’d been in love with him.

Back when he was 19 and she was 23.

They’d known each other since they were little kids.

“I need to talk to you later,” she told him.

Steve dropped his arms from around her but held her hand. “You can’t tell me now?”

She’d be 38 in December.

“Later, okay?” She winked at him to ease his suffering, and then made her way into the house, knowing that he stood there the whole time and watched her go.

But later that day never came.

Wayne wanted to get back and rest before his chemo treatment, and Dustin and his family only stayed for about an hour as they were all understandably still exhausted and wanting to recover at home.

Astrid waved goodbye to Steve on her way out, and Steve stood up from his chair thinking he’d get a kiss, or at least a hug—but then she was gone.

He tried not to think too much of it. If he’d done something to upset her, she was never shy about letting him know. Maybe she was tired of socializing, maybe she needed a break from him.

Lord knows he wished he could take a break from himself.

Eddie looked over at where you stood talking with Max and Robin, and he recalled the conversation he’d had with Wayne a few days earlier.

“I don’t have to tell you you found a good one,” Wayne said from the couch in his trailer while Eddie sat next to him. “I think you know they don’t come around very often.”

“Oh believe me, I know,” Eddie raked a hand through his hair, brushing his bangs off his forehead one, two, three times. “I keep thinking one day she’s going to wake up and realize she could do a lot better.”

“You’ve done better than you give yourself credit for,” his uncle returned in a low, steady voice.

When the next words came, Eddie felt a tightness in his throat:

“I’m proud of you, son.”

Wayne had a hard time leaving the house the day after his treatments, so Eddie always came by to bring him lunch and make sure he had everything he needed. One day he came by to check on Wayne and found that you were already there, doing his dishes for him.

He’d never been with anyone who cared about the people in his life like that.

Back at the barbeque, you slipped up next to him and planted your lips on his bicep, breathing in the sandalwood and leather of his scent. “Penny for your thoughts?”

“Since you asked,” he smirked. “I was thinking how I wish I’d met you a lot sooner.”

“How much sooner?” You batted eyes at him once he turned to face you. “In high school?”

Eddie made a yuck face. “No, you would not have given me a chance in high school. I would’ve been a lovesick puppy, but you probably wouldn’t have even known I existed.”

“Are you kidding?” You stuck the tip of your tongue out between your teeth, examining him. “I would’ve jumped your bones so fast.”

“So fast, huh?” He chuckled, taking you by the hips. “What about now?”

He pulled you in and you hummed against his lips, trying not to get too horny right there in front of the guests.

Lucas and Max would be in town for a couple days, so you and Eddie made plans to meet up at the Velvet Hammer when you were off work on Tuesday. By the time the sun went down, all of the visitors were gone, and you were happy to head home as well after helping with some cleanup.

“Robin and I can take care of it,” Katie nudged you away from trying to wash out a casserole dish at the sink. “You get out of here and go rest. Make Eddie rub your feet or something.”

You both stopped what you were doing to look at each other.

The way you were searching your friend’s face made her turn to give you her full attention. In the background, you could hear Steve trying to convince Oliver to get his pajamas on and brush his teeth in a sing-song voice.

“I can’t believe how much has happened in these past few months,” you still had soap bubbles popping on your wet hands and you slid them absently along the thighs of your jeans.

Katie gave a thoughtful sniff. “I think about it a lot,” she mused. “About that night on the couch at our place when you first told me about the guy who picked you up in the tow truck, and then meeting the boys at The Hideout and then—”

She cringed and covered her face with a dish towel, remembering her “date” with Steve. “---it feels so surreal that Steve and I actually…well…I don’t want to think about it. It’s too weird.”

“But then you and Robin found each other again,” you offered, thinking back to that first barbecue at their house when Eddie had to take off suddenly for secretive Coffin Kings business.

It was on the tip of your tongue to tell your friend about the offer from John Gregson. Katie knew you better than most people and you could always trust her advice to be on the mark.

For some reason, you wanted to cry, just drop to your knees and start bawling right there on the kitchen floor. For no one reason just

Everything

Katie caught the way your jaw moved like you were just about to say something, but then Eddie’s hands were snaking around to hold your back flush to his chest. Your hair caught on his beard stubble when he leaned in, warm breath at your ear. “You ladies need any help in here?”

You closed your eyes; you were glad to have him there. Glad to be in his arms, glad to know, in your heart, that he would always try his best for you.

But you were the one keeping a secret.

Robin joined Katie at the sink and told you both to take a hike, lovingly.

Steve came into the kitchen after you were both gone and the engine of Eddie’s Chevelle could be heard thundering down the road.

The first thing he did was pick up the beige, wall-mounted phone and call Astrid. He stood there for a while with the receiver pressed to his ear and his other arm folded over his chest before he held the mouthpiece out in front of him and stared at it.

“She’s not answering,” he mumbled loud enough that the girls could hear.

“Maybe she’s at Wayne’s? Did you check there?” Robin offered; her hair worn up in a haphazard ponytail.

Steve checked the clock first to make sure he wasn’t bothering Uncle too late, but it was barely 8:30 and he was probably up in his recliner watching M*A*S*H reruns.

Wayne answered and they exchanged a few words, but then when Steve hung up again, he was quiet, contemplatively so.

“What did he say?” Robin asked impatiently, drying some silverware with a checkered towel.

Steve frowned. “He said she dropped him off almost two hours ago and told him she was going home.”

He tried her house one more time and, again, no answer. He let it ring five times but disconnected once her answering machine clicked on.

“Maybe she went to bed early,” Katie shrugged. “And turned the ringer off.”

Steve knew better; Astrid barely slept. Normally, not being able to get a hold of her would not phase him, but something about the way she’d been acting that night set an alarm off in his gut.

Outside, there was the sound like a firecracker bomb going off that shook the house. Robin yelped and Steve bolted to the window to yank the yellow curtain back to see where it had come from.

He got there just in time to see a streak of lightning crack the dark sky and a drizzle of rain hit the glass. “Oh shit, good thing Eddie came in the Chevelle,” the droplets turned into a downpour as he stood there.

“Looks like a hell of a storm is brewing.”

—----

Earlier that day, Charlene Gregson marched out of Murray Bauman’s office with her lawyer in tow. She wore her oversized sunglasses and no expression on her face as they went down in the elevator and exited into the austere lobby. She looked like a million bucks, which was probably the cost of all of the gold and diamond jewelry she had on.

Outside on the busy street, her personal chauffeur was waiting by the Towncar to open the door for her while her lawyer, a pit-bull of a man named Saul, got in on the other side to slide in next to her. Billy was out there waiting on his bike, to make sure no one bothered her on their way out. He flicked his cigarette to the ground and revved the engine, angling to fall in line behind the Towncar.

“You sure this is what you want?” Saul posed the question to her as he slammed his door shut. They’d just thrown a lot of money at Murray and had him sign official documents.

Charlene sounded annoyed. “It’s a bit late for that, isn’t it? The deal is done.”

He continued. “I suppose I’m still trying to wrap my head around why you would—”

“I don’t pay you to ask personal questions,” she sniffed. “Just make sure there’s a smooth transition. I don’t want to be having a cocktail on the beach and find out that you fumbled something, and I’m forced to fly back out here.”

The town car sailed into traffic and the two sat in silence for a few minutes until Charlene stared out the window at the passing buildings on their way back to the lake house.

“Have you ever been in love, Saul?”

He was confused by the question and tapped his foot a few times. “I can’t really say I have.”

After recent events, and everything that he’d been tasked to do in her name for the benefit of someone else made him wonder. “What about you?”

“Only once,” she pressed her red lips together, eyes unblinking behind her sunglasses. “And once will have to be enough.”

Saul assumed she meant her soon to be ex husband John, and so he left it at that.

—-------

In a matter of seconds, the rain was coming down in sheets and the windshield wipers on the Chevelle were flapping back and forth at supernova speed.

“We could go back to my apartment if you want,” Eddie turned the Faith No More song down on the radio so that he could be heard over the rain. “But your place is cozier, and I know both are fairly small but I’ve been wanting to talk to you about—”

“I think I want to stay at my place tonight,” you blurted it out, keeping your attention fixed on the dash, staring at nothing. “Alone, if that’s alright.”

You could see in your peripheral vision that he turned to look at you, and you offered a reflexive smile, shoulders hunched a bit as if you were trying to fold in on yourself.

He smoothed his palm around the steering wheel and tried not to let the sensitive side of him that had been abandoned his whole life jump to conclusions. Not everyone needed to sleep next to the person they loved every night; you wanting space was totally reasonable and had nothing to do with your feelings for him.

Right?

Just in case, he decided to make sure. “Was it something I said or? Cause if there’s an issue between us, you know you can talk to me.”

For some reason, his insistence to have healthy communication irritated you. Possibly because you knew he was right and you should put it all out on the table and talk to him, but you didn’t know how. Your brain had barely been able to process the offer from John, let alone put the whole thing into words.

“It’s nothing you did,” you said softly. “I just need time to think.”

Something about your tone and choice of words made his heart rate increase. “Think about what?”

“Just stuff Eddie, okay? I don’t want to talk about it right now!” You snapped at him, for the first time ever.

After everything with Erika and Charlene and Melanie and thinking he’d been cheating on you, you’d never lost your temper with him, and the two of you had never had a fight. As much as you knew that arguments and disagreements were a very normal part of intimate relationships, you still felt like shit the second the words came out with such vitriol.

There it was, Eddie’s biggest fear: you were pulling away from him.

He’d suffocated you just like he was prone to do. He was “too much”, and now you were getting sick of him.

For the next few minutes of the drive to your place, neither of you said a word.

You because you didn’t want to take your confusion and anxiety out on Eddie, and Eddie because he didn’t want to sound like a whiny, needy bitch and make things worse.

He parked up in your driveway to get you close to the door, but he kept the engine running to let you know he was honoring your wish to drop you off and let you be.

You took a deep breath and flipped the manual lock up with two fingers.

“Wait, let me—” he was about to get out and come around to hold his coat out for you so that you wouldn’t get wet, but you were too quick for him.

“I’ll be fine, goodnight.” you were soaked the second you stepped out, fumbling in the pocket of your bag to find your keys.

“I love you,” Eddie’s voice was barely loud enough to be heard over the weather.

“Love you too,” you said quickly, and then you were bolting for the house, wishing you’d left the porch light on.

Once you were inside, you clicked the deadbolt shut and watched the beam of Eddie’s headlights retreat.

This was ridiculous. You were being ridiculous.

There’s a beautiful man out there who treats you better than you’ve ever been treated in your whole life.

You threw your bag on the floor and undid the lock to jerk open the door again.

You stumbled out into the rain. “Eddie wait!”

But all you could see were his taillights as he pulled onto the main street and drifted away.

—------

Back at her house, Astrid let the phone ring.

At one point, she had her hand on it, ready to pick up, but then decided against it.

It was impossible for her to be fake with Steve, but she also wasn’t ready to be as forthcoming as she needed to be.

She stood at the table and looked at the paperwork from the doctor's office one more time before she made her way over to the couch and hugged a pillow to her chest to let the tears fall hot and heavy.

She had her eyes closed, so she didn’t notice the lights approaching in the driveway or hear Steve shouting her name from the sidewalk as he stood out in the rain.

He’d borrowed Robin’s car to ease his mind and make sure Astrid was okay. What if she had slipped and hit her head or something? What if she was there with another dude? Also, a possibility under their “don’t ask, don’t tell” relationship agreement.

The white t-shirt he had on was soaked through, making the tattoos underneath look like they were a design imprinted on the material that hugged his muscles.

He banged on the door with the side of his fist and shouted her name again.

By then, Astrid could hear him, but she stayed curled on the couch and waited in vain for him to give up and leave.

—--

Eddie scowled to himself as he parked the Chevelle in one of the garages and made his way across the parking lot and up the steps to his apartment, shaking his wet hair like a dog. He could hear a few of the guys partying in the clubhouse, and he thought about joining them, but realized his spirits were too low to be social. There was a punching bag in the back office where he normally did his workouts to burn off steam, but he wasn’t in the mood for that either.

He told himself he would check on you first thing in the morning, but then it occurred to him that you might not want to hear from him right away. He wanted to respect your wishes, your boundaries.

He didn’t want to smother you.

On the nightstand next to his phone was the card for the real estate agent he’d visited the day before. There was a room on the second floor of the Ferguson farmhouse with a view of the big backyard and he imagined setting some easels up to make it a place for you to paint. It had a big living room with a fireplace and a workshed in the barn. He wanted to talk to you about it, to ask if maybe you could see yourself living there. With him.

But now he wondered if things were moving too fast.

He crossed his arms over his body and took his shirt off in the bathroom mirror. He rubbed a hand down his stomach, noting the areas of skin that were not covered in inked designs. The fanged bat with wings spread wide on his chest, the dragon design on his bicep, the grim reaper on his forearm. A crude dagger made to look like it pierced his skin just under his rib cage that said, “true friends stab you in the front”. There were other bits of traditional biker flash scattered around that Steve had doodled on him over the past decade. On his other forearm was a memorial tattoo for his mother with her name, the year she died, and an angel statue with eyes that dripped blood, surrounded in roses and thorns, and the thorns came down over the back of his hand. It was done in a way so that the bats that had been inked there earlier were still visible.

He was barely 15 when another friend inked HELLFIRE on his knuckles. It was done with a homemade tattooing gun like the ones used in prison, and the letters had to be redone later because they were basically chicken scratches. One of the other earliest ones was the skull with a snake through it on his opposite bicep with his nickname “War Machine” underneath.

Some days, he wanted to get them all removed and start over.

Other days, he wanted to go balls to the wall like Steve and be inked from ear to foot.

He threw his soaked shirt in the hamper and was just about to grab a beer out of the small fridge near his desk to take into the shower with him—

but then there was a knock at the door.

At first, he thought it was one of the other Coffin Kings, trying to drag him down to get plastered with them, but then he noticed that the rapping of knuckles was soft, cautious even.

“Eddie?”

His head snapped around at the sound of the voice.

It was you.

—------

Steve held his finger on the doorbell, relentlessly. “Astrid, if you don’t answer the goddamn door, I’m gonna break it down! You know I will!”

Astrid wiped her face, flapping her hand to dry her eyes and cheeks to the best of her ability. She still had on the flowy, floral, maxi dress with an empire waist that she’d worn at the barbeque, and she wrapped a black shawl around her shoulders as she stomped begrudgingly to the door.

Just as she was about to reach up to unlock the safety chain, there was a loud thud from Steve’s foot slamming into the wood, vibrating the hinges.

“Steve stop!” She yelled, fussing with the second lock on the doorknob.

She yanked the door back and there he was: soaked to the bone.

There was only a short awning over her front steps, and so he was standing as close to the frame as possible while more thunder rumbled in the distance. His wet hair had flopped into his eyes, and he swiped it back with a twist of his head, spitting to the sidewalk as he did so.

His expression was one of anger at first, but then it melted into confusion when he could tell right away that she had been crying. “Why aren’t you answering your phone?”

“This is a bad time,” she stayed blocking the entrance, although the yearning in his eyes was actively testing her resolve.

“The hell it is?” He pushed. He shifted to see behind her, as if there was someone or something she was hiding. “You’re upset, I can tell. Let me in.”

“No.” That was her answer, but Steve wasn’t having it.

He stomped up onto the threshold, wet hair dripping onto her face as he closed in, bracing his hand on the door so that she couldn’t shut it. “Why don’t you want to see me?”

She tried to look everywhere but his face, but then his hand caught her chin and guided her eyes up to meet his.

“Talk to me,” he whispered from lips dotted in water droplets.

There was a tug of war going on in her heart, and in the end, Steve won. He always did.

She didn’t invite him in properly, she just turned on her heel and left the door open, knowing he would follow her into the living room.

His boots squeaked from all the moisture on her hardwood floors. He always liked to take his shoes off when he came to see her, but it was too late for that. He found her sitting on the couch in the dark, but he could only see the outline of her curly hair.

“Why are you sitting here without any lights on?” He reached down and flicked on a tiny wicker lamp that was on the nearby bookshelf.

“You ask a lot of questions,” she mumbled.

He pinched the front of his shirt to peel it from his body and flapped it a few times as if that would dry it out. “What did you want to talk to me about at the barbeque?”

“You’re soaking wet,” she got a good look at him in the light and suddenly felt bad that she’d made him wait out there.

“No kidding?” He snorted sarcastically.

“You left some of your clothes here last time. I folded them in the third drawer,” she hugged the pillow. “Get into something dry and then we can talk.”

He stripped down to his underwear right there in front of her, staring at her the entire time, as if he was worried she would bolt and try to hide from him. His patchwork of colorful tattoos was a jumble of loud expressions of his aggression and passion. In honor of his nickname Taz, he had several Tasmanian devils doing various things including riding a motorcycle and one on the back of his arm giving onlookers the middle finger. The ones on the front of his thighs were all self-done when he was just a kid, practicing his craft. When he was a teenager, he used to tease her and call her “Asteroid” and just above his knee was an asteroid with a fire tail crashing toward a heart-shaped earth. Besides the Seek and Destroy tattoo on the side of his throat, his skin was full of phrases, including the big “FTW” letters in an arc under his ribcage that stood for “Fuck the World”.

He went into her bedroom and brought out a pair of jeans and a blue t-shirt with “Gary’s Plumbing” advertised on the front pocket. He dressed in front of her as well, keeping a relentless eye.

“You really are ridiculous, you know that?” She put her chin in her palm and waited patiently for the show to be over.

He flapped his arms out to his sides like a little kid waiting for approval on his outfit. “Okay, beautiful. I’m dry. Time to spill the beans.”

“Can you sit down, please?” Her heart flopped in her chest as she considered the words that were about to come out of her mouth and the effect, they would have on him.

In Steve’s experience, when someone asked you to sit down before they told you something, it was always their attempt to soften the blow of bad news. “Why can’t you just tell me now? You’re freaking me out, babe.”

“Steve,” She pleaded sternly. “Trust me, I need you to sit down for this.”

—------

Eddie barely had time to greet you before you were pushing by him to get into the studio apartment. You were hugging yourself, and anxiety had your stomach in knots.

“I need to talk to you about something,” you gushed.

Eddie stood at the door, keeping his back to you while he locked it. He was shirtless, dark hair dripping down the pale muscles that flexed under his flesh.

You looked around, trying to decide if you should sit or stand when your gaze landed on the painting you’d done for him after that first time you met. He had it displayed front and center, right above his desk on the main navy-blue wall, as if it were the most important piece in the room.

You were pacing when he turned toward you, the wheels in your mind spinning.

When he got closer, you stepped further away, but he caught your wrist. “Hey, why can’t you look at me? What’s going on?” His voice was sterner than he’d intended it to be.

“I can look at you,” you made yourself meet his stare to prove his point, but it was difficult. You felt like he could see right through you; all of your doubts, all of your fears and insecurities.

“Sit,” he directed you over to the end of the bed, facing the small sitting area with where there was a couch and a coffee table in front of an old Zenith tv.

Next to you, the mattress sank under his weight, but in your mind, you were somewhere else.

“So, is this it?” He released a heavy breath and started to play with one of the rings on his hand, pulling it up the finger and then pushing it back down to the knuckle.

“What do you mean?”

It was he who couldn’t look at you now. “Are you breaking up with me?”

“No!” You blurted it, eyebrows pinching together in frustration with the way you couldn’t get the words out. “That’s not…I didn’t mean…I just have a lot on my mind, that’s all.”

A rush of endorphins filled him with temporary relief while he waited for your next words.

You stretched your neck from side to side, swallowed hard, and then you told him.

You told him about John’s offer to run your own gallery in Chicago, the opportunity to have the artists loft you’d always dreamed of. You picked at a piece of skin on the side of your thumb as you talked.

“But I said I needed to talk to you about it first,” you added.

Eddie got to his feet and went over to look out the window over the garage parking lot. “Sounds like a pretty sweet deal,” he mumbled.

You weren’t breaking up with him, but you were, in fact, leaving him, which was much the same thing.

“Well, it’s complicated,” you said, watching as he went over to snatch his pack of smokes and lighter off of the coffee table.

“Doesn’t sound complicated to me,” the cigarette bobbed between his pinched lips as he talked, cupping his hand to light the end. “Sounds like you already know what your answer is.”

“I wouldn’t be talking to you about it if I’d already made my decision,” you countered. “I want to know what you think.”

“Well,” he scoffed, exhaling a sharp plume of smoke down his chin. His eyes were much darker now, almost black. “No one in their right mind would choose to stay in Hawkins, not with an opportunity like that on the table.”

He almost added, “no loser biker boyfriend is worth it,” but decided it was not the right time to be self-deprecating.

“But I like it here,” you mused. “More than I ever thought I would.”

“We’ll always be here, trust me,” he was trying to remain cool, but his exterior was cracking. “So, this John guy has been stalking you or something? Getting you to do this painting for him was one thing, but now he’s waiting for you at your job to get you to what? ----Move to Chicago to be closer to him?”.

The smoke came out his nose that time and the muscles in his throat tensed. He had a bad feeling about that guy before, but he wanted to respect your business ventures and give you space.

The change in Eddie’s demeanor made you wonder if that was the time for full transparency. In the end, you’d made a promise not to have any secrets from each other and you wanted to keep your word.

“There was mention of that, yes,” you said cautiously, nibbling at your lip.

“Mention of what, exactly?” Eddie scowled, cocking his head to the side.

“He said there were lots of places he wanted to take me to in the city,” you recited the words cautiously.

Eddie laughed and threw his head back; it was much more of a crazy, maniacal cackle. “Oh shit, maybe I should pay him a little visit? See if pretty boy wants to show me the city too.”

“Eddie.”

“What did you tell him?” He was fuming now, grinding his jaw as he stabbed the half-smoked cig into the ashtray.

“I didn’t tell him anything,” you repeated, but in a much louder voice. “I said I needed to talk to you, my boyfriend.”

“He knows you have a boyfriend, and he still pulled that shit?” Eddie bit the tip of his tongue between his teeth with a grimace. “That fucker needs to get rolled.”

“Eddie!”

“No, I’m serious,” he was yelling now, but more about the situation than at you. “I gave him a chance to be cool, to be a gentleman, and he fucked it up. I told you babe, dudes like that, with money, think they can take whatever they want. Well, he can’t have you, unless it’s over my dead fucking body.”

“Well, it’s my fucking choice, and I don’t want to be with him, I want to be with you, asshole,” You shot to your feet.

You’d realized something on your way over to his place and it was that you really did not want to leave Hawkins.

Every rational bone in your body told you to take the offer and run, but the other bones in your body, the not so rational ones, told you that you’d finally found your family and a place you belonged.

“Listen to me,” you grabbed him by the arm and made him turn, his hair flying over his shoulder. “I don’t want to take the job, okay? I want to stay here. With you.”

Eddie nostrils flared. It was taking all of his strength not to go out looking for that pencil pushing dweeb Gregson. But if he actually got his hands on him in the heat of the moment, he was afraid of what he would do.

“I’ll move with you,” Eddie wet his lips, a new idea flashing behind his eyes.

“With me? To Chicago?”

“Yeah, no, I could make it work. Hire another manager here, another tow truck driver. Come back and check in a couple times a month,” he walked by you as he talked, plucking at his lower lip with thumb and forefinger. “I could get a job at a garage in Chicago, easy. There’s even a King’s chapter there. I could get Bones to patch me in.”

“What about Wayne? And Oliver?”

“We’ll come back to visit,” Eddie nodded at the plan that was forming in his head. “Steve and Robin and the kid love Chicago. Maybe we can get a place with a spare bedroom for when they come up.”

“But what about—”

“I know this means a lot to you, this opportunity,” he cut you off. “I know I’m a dirty, biker asshole, but I’m not going to be the reason you give up on a dream.” He went over to the dresser drawers and pulled out a Pabst Blue Ribbon shirt to pull on over his head. The armholes were cut wide, and the collar was frayed.

“But what if I don’t want to live in Chicago?”

Eddie squinted like he hadn’t heard you correctly. “What now?”

You bit the inside of your cheek in contemplation. “I’ve been thinking that I don’t really care about that world anymore, the art world I mean.”

“You don’t want to paint anymore?” He appeared hurt by this notion.

“No, I do, I will always paint,” you corrected with a wave of your hand. “But the retail side of it, the snobby clientele, the stress, I’m not sure it makes me happy anymore. Not sure if it ever did.”

It was Eddie who took a seat that time, perching on the back of the sofa. You could tell he was trying to understand, but the information was coming at him a bit too fast.

“I don’t want to work at the Hammer for the rest of my life, either, but it’s okay for now,” you were working through the revelations as you spoke them aloud. “I have a friend who is starting her own greeting card company, and she wants me to do some artwork for her. Little by little, I can make a living while still doing what I love.”

Eddie’s thoughts drifted back to the farmhouse, and how much he felt like it fit the both of you.

“Are you telling me you chose Hawkins? Really?”

You went over to situate your hips between his knees and brushed his bangs off his forehead. “No, I’m saying I choose you, asshole,” a smile tugged the side of your mouth up. “Hawkins is a bonus, yes, but I will always choose you.”

Foreheads met then, and Eddie forced out a long-held breath from between tight lips. “I don’t want you to wake up one day and realize you made a mistake.”

“The only thing I regret is that I didn’t get to jump your bones in high school.”

He chuckled, repeating what he’d asked at the barbeque earlier. “Well, what about now?”

In the back of his mind he was thinking, “that John Gregson is still a dead man,” but he kept it to himself.

—----

Steve flopped down next to Astrid on the fluffy, tan sofa so violently it was as if he’d been thrown there by a force of nature. He scooted closer and pawed at her hand so that she would intertwine her fingers with his. He was reminded of all of those times as a teenager when he would get hurt on purpose just so she would patch him up. She was a couple years older and wanted nothing to do with him back then, but nevertheless he melted under the tender touch of her attention every time.

“I’m all ears,” he prodded eagerly when she did not speak right away.

Keeping Steve’s hand with hers, Astrid turned to face him and tucked her bare feet underneath her, adjusting the stretch length of her dress.

Steve watched the way her long hair fell across her neck and ample cleavage.

“Okay,” she cleared her throat. “What I need to tell you is—”

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured, perpetually distracted.

“Steve?”

“Sorry, go ahead.”

Another big inhale and then: “These past few weeks, I could tell something was…off. I thought it was early menopause because I missed my period.”

Steve stared blankly, trying not to get turned on watching her lips move.

She let her gaze fall to their hands clasped on Steve’s knee, wondering if any of it was real, or if she was still dreaming.

“Is it cancer?” He dared to ask, squeezing her hand. “Because I’m not going to let anything happen to you. I’ll find the best doctor at gunpoint if I have to.”

“Steve!”

“What? You’re making me crazy! Tell me everything's okay?”

“I’m not dying, Steve.”

“Well then what is it? I’ve been going out of my mind and here you are—”

“I’m pregnant.”

His body had been moving, vibrating even, but it all came to a complete halt at that.

As if he’d been flash-frozen on the spot.

A mannequin of himself; mouth open, one eyebrow up.

He shook his head, confused. “Hold on, what? But I thought you said that you—”

She played with the hem of her shawl. “I was told it was impossible. I was told it would take a miracle.”

“Wait a minute, so—” he gulped and then leaned forward to search her face, one arm scooping behind her. Her eyes were glossy again, on the verge of another wellspring.

“Is it m-my…is it my baby?” He stammered.

She could only nod, chin quivering as more tears gathered at her lash line only to race down her cheeks once she blinked.

Steve lost it then too, sucking in air before he choked on his own emotions. He brought her hand to his chest and held it there. “My baby,” he gasped, eyes flooding. “You’re having my baby. We’re having a baby.”

“Yeah,” she hiccuped and sniffed. “You’re not upset?”

“Upset? Why would I be upset? How could you even think that?” He was deeply offended that she would question his reaction to something he’d wanted his whole life with her, specifically.

He was wiping her tears away with his thumbs as she spoke. “This is far from convenient, Steve. The way we both live our lives, we never planned for this. We barely have two pennies to rub together between us and—”

“Shhhh,” he kissed her nose and her eyelids and her mouth. “Money comes and goes, sweetheart. It doesn’t matter, nothing matters, but you and this baby. Our baby.”

Our baby. He couldn’t stop saying it.

He hadn’t known about Oliver until a few days before he was born, and he always felt robbed of all that time in the womb when he could’ve bonded with his son. Tina had been a three-day fling at a music festival, and he never had any intention of seeing her again. He’d been prepared to do the right thing though, to be a family even if it killed him, but then Tina just handed him a baby boy a week old and drove away, as if he knew what the fuck he was doing.

Robin had been in the car waiting for him when it happened. She saw him standing there in the street holding that screaming baby in a blanket and right then and there, a mother was born.

He put his hand on Astrid’s stomach, gently. “Can I feel it move yet? The baby?”

She laughed into her hand as she wiped her nose. “I’m barely seven weeks along, silly.”

He curled down like he always did when he put his head in her lap, but instead he placed his ear on her stomach, massaging her thigh with his hand. “I don’t think you can hear me, little one, but daddy has loved your mother his whole life and I love you very much.”

His next words were to Astrid; a murmur into the meat of her. “Will you let me love you now? The way I’ve always wanted to? Will you stay with me?”

She scratched her fingers through his hair, and then held his head there when his arms went around her waist. They stayed like that for a long while.

A bit later, in bed with her head on his chest, he was half asleep when she whispered: “You know that twins run in my family, right?”

—------

“A geriatric pregnancy,” Steve told you from across the bar when you were both back at work the next evening to the tune of Connection by Elastica.

You made a face while you put some limes and shots of tequila on your tray.

“That’s what they call it, I guess, when a woman is over 35,” he shrugged. “A geriatric pregnancy. So, I’m forcing her to take it easy.”

He was letting you and Shana in on the good news, and he’d been grinning from ear to ear for so long, his cheeks hurt. His gold incisor caught the red lights like it had a ruby in it. He’d even been smiling in his sleep, somehow, as Astrid noticed when she got up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom.

“I’m so happy for you,” you mirrored his enthusiasm. “Does Eddie know? Wayne?”

“Not yet,” he made a loose fist and cracked his knuckles. “We wanted to tell Uncle together. I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone, but I couldn’t wait,” he added sheepishly. “She knows I can’t keep a secret like that.”

“I’ll wait and let you give Eddie the news,” you told him. “I think he’d rather hear it from you.”

“Where is that War Machine?” Steve looked around, adjusting his sunglasses on his head. “I owe him a drink.”

“That’s a good question,” you glanced at the clock that was up by the wall-mounted tv. “He said he was going to stop by, but that was almost two hours ago.” It didn’t concern you too much because your boyfriend was a busy guy, and last-minute things were always popping up at the shop.

It was on your to-do list to call John on your break and let him know you were turning down his offer. The more you thought about it, the more you wondered if he’d planned to hire you on merit, or if he just wanted to get into your pants. When you thought about the possibility of the latter, it made your blood pressure spike.

You delivered a round of drinks to a table, and on your way back to the bar, there was a man in a suit coming through the door, holding a briefcase.

Steve gave him a nod when they made eye contact, but he didn’t ask to check his ID because the man had a graying hairline and was possibly mid-fifties at the least. He was fit though, and had a very confident demeanor about him. He looked like he was there to do business.

“My name is Saul,” he introduced himself to Steve with a handshake and Steve stood up from his stool to be eye level with him. “I’m looking for Steve Harrington.”

“You found him,” Steve rolled his neck, wondering what he could possibly want from him.

Saul gave a stiff smile that did not reach his eyes.

By then you were at the bar, acting like you were busy so that you could eavesdrop.

“What’s this about?” Steve pushed the sleeves of his flannel up to his elbows, exposing his tattoos.

“Well, it would behoove you to give me a moment of your time,” he moved one side of his suit jacket back to shove his hand in his pocket, rocking back on his heels.

“I have some business to discuss with you on behalf of Charlene Gregson.”

—------

John Gregson had no idea he was being followed.

He vaguely registered the sound of the loud pipes from the motorcycles rolling up to Margie’s diner, but he was having a late lunch with a business associate and didn’t pay much attention to it. He preferred white tablecloth lunch meetings, but in Hawkins there weren’t many choices. Their BLT was unbeatable though, as was the chocolate cream pie. He’d have to calculate them both into his low-carb diet and spend extra time at the gym in the morning.

He had his back to the door, making notes in his date book as the man across from him spoke over the sound of clattering dishes and silverware.

He felt the shadows pass over the table, but he figured it was a group on the way to sit at a booth further down.

But they came to a halt and loomed there, smelling of leather and tobacco.

John glanced over the top of his reading glasses at his companion first and saw that the color had drained from his face.

There were four members of the Coffin Kings glaring down at them.

Eddie frowned at the man with John and jerked his thumb to the side. “Get up,” he said. “Find somewhere else to be, I need to talk to your friend here.”

Devlin sank into the booth behind John while Van stood across the aisle flipping his butterfly knife, and Lucas stayed next to Eddie.

“Now, hold on just a—” John began to protest, about to get to his feet, but Lucas clapped a hand onto his shoulder and pushed him back down with calm, steady force.

His companion’s eyes darted from Eddie to John a few times before he gathered his things in a rush, tucking all of his papers under his arm, and shimmied past Van while holding his breath. It was clear he had no intention of going to wait at another table, he was down the row of booths and out the front door in a flash.

With a heavy sigh, Eddie sank into the seat across from John, wallet chain dragging on the vinyl as he settled in, stretching his arms wide along the back of the bench.

Lucas turned his back on the two but stood in the same spot, feet planted wide, hands in his pockets, blocking John from leaving.

With a resolute nod, John put his pen down. “Have we met? I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure—”

“Cut the crap, man,” Eddie huffed with a lazy grin and hooded eyes. “You know exactly who I am.”

John took his glasses off and tucked them inside his jacket pocket. “Fair enough. How can I help you?”

Eddie plucked a pack of smokes out of the front pocket of his cut and motioned for Devlin to toss him a lighter.

“This is a no smoking section,” John reminded him, pointing to the sign on the wall with a red line through a cigarette.

Eddie stared at him as he lit the end and sucked in his cheeks until the cherry glowed orange.

He waited until after a generous exhale to speak, directing the smoke into John’s leftover pie.

“You see, John—can I call you John? I’ve been really…patient when it comes to this infatuation you have with my girl. More patient than you deserve, I think.”

John clicked his tongue. “Now, you misunderstand me, I—”

“I haven’t misunderstood shit,” Eddie scoffed a laugh.

The waitress came over, and John was sure she was going to tell him to put his cigarette out, but instead she just gave him the most flirtatious smile. “You want some coffee, hun? You hungry?”

Eddie finished taking another drag and winked at her. “Just coffee for me, darlin’,” and then he gestured to the other Coffin Kings. “Get these boys whatever they want and wrap it up to go. It’s on John’s tab.”

Once she was gone, Eddie continued. “Here’s what’s gonna happen, slick,” he reached over to tap the ash out on John’s plate. “Once she finishes this painting, you’re gonna to pay her more than what you initially offered, and then you’re never going to see her or talk to her ever again. Comprendo?”

John used the back of his fingers to push the plate a few inches away, dabbing the sides of his mouth with his napkin. “My offer for her to run my gallery in Chicago had no devious intentions, I assure you. I genuinely believe she is that talented.”

Eddie ground his teeth, jaw muscles bulging. “She’s beyond talented, you got that right, but she doesn’t want to work for you. You’re a creep. Throwing money and big promises around to get what you want. I know your type.”

“My type?”

“Has your wife ever mentioned me?” Eddie inquired, exhaling into John’s face.

He watched John visibly go rigid.

Rhonda set Eddie’s coffee cup on a saucer down in front of him with extra creamer and poured him a steaming cup.

John cleared his throat. “I think it would be in her best interest—”

“You don’t know what’s best for her,” Eddie bit. “Who are you, her fucking dad?”

He’d said it a bit too loud and a few people from other tables craned their necks to follow the sound.

Eddie leaned forward, whispering tensely. “I don’t think I have to tell you that I have friends in low places. People who will do what I say at the drop of a hat. You think you can hide behind your money? You’re wrong. The people who pump your gas and make your food and clean your bathroom? They’re all with me. You’ll be looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life. If you fuck with me on this, if you seek my girl out after I’ve told you not to? Well, then, I hope you like dentures sweetheart because I’m gonna pull your perfect, pearly teeth out one by one.”

By the time he was done, his hand had curled into a fist on the table. He spread the ringed fingers out wide and then made the fist again, making John look at it.

Eddie snubbed out his smoke in John’s pie with a sizzle and then settled back in his seat, relaxing his shoulders. He cocked an eyebrow up. “Are we good?”

John sat back as well. “We’re good,” he acknowledged stiffly, adjusting his suit jacket.

Eddie slapped the table and gave John a wink. “Well, this was fun,” he chuckled. “We should catch up more often.”

He took a quick gulp of his coffee and slid out of the booth.

He stopped to bend over and whisper, “don’t forget to tip well, slick,” in John’s ear on his way out.

—-------

By the time Eddie showed up at the Velvet Hammer, swatting away plumes of second-hand smoke as he went, everyone knew that Steve was going to be a dad again. Even the new customers who’d barely just walked in the door that evening.

Astrid had prepared for this.

One of the many complicated reasons she’d waited more than a week to tell him was because she’d known that, if he knew, he’d be announcing it to everyone he passed by on the street.

Steve jumped from his stool and hugged Eddie. “I’ve got great news, man,” he clapped Eddie a few times on the arm, over the thick leather jacket he had on.

Eddie had been on his way across the room to you when his friend stopped him, so the sudden affection took him off guard. “I like good news,” he caught your eye over Steve’s shoulder and smirked.

Steve let him know that he was going to be a dad again, which Eddie assumed would happen sooner than later, but he was surprised and delighted to know that Astrid was the mom. They both knew that she’d been told it would be nearly impossible for her to conceive.

Steve leaned in. “This proves it, man, I have a magic dick.”

“Sure you do,” Eddie scoffed, patting Steve on the cheek a few times. “Only took you 15 years.”

Before you could greet him, Eddie was already in front of you, pulling you flush to his body. He started to walk and you took backwards steps to stay with him. “Can you take your break right now?”

“I wasn’t going to for another hour but—”

“I need to talk to you,” he hushed.

“Um, okay, well,” you glanced over at Shana and she waved you off.

His mouth found yours the second you were obscured in the dark hallway. You figured he’d be escorting you out to the alley where you usually took your breaks with him so he could smoke, but this time, he pulled you into one of the two unisex bathrooms and locked it behind him. The bulbs inside were red, and it set an eerie, bloodwashed glow.

“This place sees a lot of action,” you mumbled into his kiss as he worked your skirt up so that he could take a handful of the meat of your ass. “I like to call it Steve’s Office.”

Before you knew what was happening, he was hoisting you up onto the sink counter with a grunt. Your thighs and bum were fully exposed now, covered in fishnet stockings, and one of his hands held your face while the other rubbed a knuckle over the heat between your legs. Your panties and stockings were preventing him from going further, but not for long.

You were about to protest, to say you had to get back to work, or to remind him how many women Steve had probably railed in that very spot, but

Fuck

And just when you softened with a shaky moan, he kissed a trail down your jaw and throat, with a few nibbles in between.

You whimpered, spreading your legs further apart, Doc Marten booted feet locking onto his thighs to keep him close.

“I have something..” smooch “...that I need…” smooch “...to ask you…” smooch

“Right now?” You palmed his hard length over his denim and then went to work at undoing his belt buckle. “We only have 10 minutes.”

He leaned back, letting his cherry bitten lips hover there at eye level. His bangs were getting too long, he needed a trim, and you brushed them to the side, off of his eyebrows.

“Do you want to move in with me?”

You blinked a few times. “Into your apartment?”

“No, no,” eager lips found your mouth again and his thumb rubbed circles over the taut nub of your nipple through your shirt. “The big farmhouse down on Marigold Road. I pointed it out once when we drove by.”

You stopped. “The old Ferguson place? Aren’t there people already living there?”

“Not anymore,” he could feel your arousal soaking through your underwear and he hissed, grinding his erection against your thigh. “I want to buy it. For us.”

In your desperation, you reached down and clawed at the section of black fishnet that was keeping him from you, ripping a little further down your thigh than you’d intended to.

Eddie kissed down the front of you on the way to his knees, and then your underwear was pulled to one side and his tongue was on your swollen clit, rolling in circles there.

You dug your fingers into his hair with one hand and supported yourself on the ledge with the other. He sucked a few times, and then his tongue went inside of you, and you bit your lip, squirming to try and repress a scream.

“That is a big step,” you gasped. “Moving in together.”

For the longest time, you couldn’t see yourself living with anyone other than a roommate ever again.

He hummed on your now soaked cunt and then kitten licked it a few times. “I’m ready. Are you?”

You didn’t respond at first because your eyes were rolling back in your head, so he popped off to get to his feet, his chin glistening. He spread your thighs further apart to make room for his hips and undid his zipper.

His pupils bloomed wide as he searched your lustful eyes, insecurities making his heart rate quicken. “Are you not ready? I mean, do you not want that? Is it too soo—”

But then you silenced him with your mouth, lapping up your juices from his chin, moving away a strand of his hair that had stuck there. “I want to see the inside. Could we go look at it together?”

“Yeah we can,” he pushed his boxers down and rubbed the tip of his leaking cock along your slit. “I’ll call the real estate dude in the morning.”

You clung to his neck, jaw going slack as he sank in. “I’ll have to check with Charlie.”

He chucked into the kiss at you mentioning your cat, and then he was stretching you out, easing his way in, aching to be one with you.

“Deeper…more,” you whimpered, and then you each let out a muffled cry when he filled you to the hilt, flush inside of your pulsing heat.

He rested his forehead on yours and began to work his hips, thrusting deep and retreating with a curl of his hips so that you could feel every vein, every ridge, but then you were clenching around him, and he sped up with a curse, a thumb working at your clit.

“This…fuck, I’m going to cum so hard inside of you,” he admitted with a huff. His belt buckle clinked against his zipper with every thrust. “You want that? You want all of me?”

“Fuck, Eddie, yes,” You whined, clinging to him as stars exploded behind your eyes.

His strong fingers dug into your flesh to hold your legs in place, and after a few more shaking pumps, he was spilling inside of you, each of you a moaning mess of “I love yous”, clawing at the other to be closer.

Someone banged on the door just as the two of you were catching your breath and Eddie was still inside of you.

“Get lost!” Eddie yelled, not caring if it was a customer.

“Are you two having a tea party in there? Cabbage Patch meeting perhaps?”

It was Steve, and then you could hear his ruckus laughter as he banged another few times just to be cheeky.

You adjusted your underwear back into place, and Eddie fastened his jeans before he helped you down off the counter. You pulled your skirt down and checked yourself in the mirror.

Yikes.

The rip down your inner thigh was painfully obvious. You wondered if shredding them in a few more places would make it more of “a look”, but then realized that the lighting in the Hammer was not great, and it wasn’t unheard of for someone to accidentally rip their stockings at work.

But what about when Eddie’s seed started to drip down your leg?

“You go,” you shooed him away as he stood there adjusting the collar of his jacket, waiting for you. “I need to pee.”

He was looking at himself in the mirror, rubbing lipstick off his cheek, but then he turned just before grabbing for the door. “If you don’t want to, you know, live together right away, I get it. But with Katie moving in with Robin and all, I figured—”

“You figured we could be roommates?”

He smirked, giving a bashful shrug. “A little more than that, maybe. Roommates with benefits.”

“Yeah?” You sank against his chest, forever helpless to his gravitational pull. “What kind of benefits?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” he rubbed the sides of your arms with his calloused hands. “I’ll make you pancakes.”

“You think you can make pancakes?”

“Baby, I've told you before, you ain’t seen nothing yet.”

—-------

“WAYNE!”

Uncle entered the Hammer and everyone screamed his name like he was Norm in an episode of Cheers.

It had been a while since he dropped by unannounced, and he looked better than ever.

Still much thinner than he had been the year before, and it was hard for him to catch his breath sometimes, but his eyes were bright, and he wore a soft smile more often than not.

Maybe the chemo was working? Maybe there was hope?

Devlin had been sitting on the stool at the bar next to Eddie, but Eddie was quick to tell him to take a hike when Wayne showed up.

“What did the doctor say?” He asked as his uncle straddled the stool and got comfortable. He was in a green and white plaid work shirt and had decided to leave his Coffin Kings leather at home.

Wayne gave a single nod and patted around for his smokes out of habit, even though he’d given it up when he started treatment. “Just heard Steve's gonna be a dad again. He better treat her right, that's all I can say." It was obvious he was damn near giddy at the thought, Eddie could see it in the way a smile kept tugging at the sides of his mouth. "I’m sick of talking about doctors and my goddamn condition. Want to forget about it for a night.”

Eddie respected that, and tapped the bar to order him one of those non-alcoholic beers that they kept cold specifically for Wayne and one other regular patron.

You barely had a chance to give Wayne a shoulder squeeze when Robin burst in through the door, frantically scanning the crowd. There was a dancer on the backstage, working her way down the poll, and Steve had gone over to remind a few rowdy customers to behave themselves. Robin rushed over and met him halfway, in front of the glowing jukebox.

He found no comfort in the way she looked like she’d been crying.

“What’s going on?” Felt like his heart literally stopped beating in his chest. “Are you okay?”

“The spare key,” she held her palm out. “You used it last time and now I’m locked out of the house.”

He felt around in his back pocket. “Where are your regular keys?”

She rolled her eyes, bouncing in frustration. “I lost them somewhere, okay? At work maybe, I’m not sure, but Oliver just threw a fit, I’m on my period, and we’re all just in a really bad mood and want to go home.”

“Alright, alright, here take my key,” he wrestled it off the metal ring to hand it to her. “Just remember to leave the back door unlocked for me. Is Oliver in the car?”

“No, he’s at Katie’s place with her, I needed to take a drive alone so that I could scream,” she snatched the key from him.

“Shit, you had me worried for a second.”

“Sorry,” admittedly, she felt like she was overreacting to something so small and fixable, but more likely her tears were from an accumulation of things. Once the panic spike subsided, her eyes landed on half of a white envelope peeking out of the pocket of his Coffin Kings leather, right above his TAZ insignia. She always teased him and said his official nickname should’ve been Dingus.

“What’s this?” It looked like it had some official lettering in the corner, and she plucked it out to look closer.

They made their way back to the front so he could keep an eye on the door, and she frowned at the name of a law office in the corner.

“I don’t know, I haven’t opened it yet,” he shrugged. “Some douchey lawyer brought it by, said it was from Charlene. It was busy when he came in, so he gave me that to read and told me to call him in the morning.”

“Fucking Charlene?” She balked. “What, is she suing you for not wanting to be her boyfriend?”

“I haven’t had time to open in, but it wouldn’t surprise me.”

A group of people came in, and two looked like they were 16, so Steve carded them.

Robin ripped the top of the envelope open. You stepped in front of her on your way to a table, and the two of you collided.

You said a quick apology and were about to ask if she wanted a drink, when Shana shouted across the bar to tell Robin the phone was for her.

“It’s your boss from the motel,” Shana continued, holding her hand over the bottom half of the receiver.

Robin gave a heavy, exasperated sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose. “She’s going to ask me to work a double shift tomorrow, I just know it.”

She shoved the paperwork at you that she’d just unfolded, but not yet read. “Hold this for me? Be right back.”

“Oh—okay,” you had the paperwork pressed flat to your chest as you made your way over to stand at Eddie’s shoulder. He was talking to Wayne, but he reached back and squeezed your thigh in greeting.

You hadn’t meant to look, to eavesdrop on their private business.

But once glance was all it took

For you to be fully invested

Charlene’s name was the first thing to catch your eye

And then, The Velvet Hammer

You took a few long blinks, unsure if what you were looking at was real.

You mouthed a few of the words quietly just to make sure you were reading them correctly.

The way you froze made Eddie curious, and he turned his head to see what you were doing.

“What’s up babe? What is that?”

“It’s, uh—” you stammered. “It’s Steve’s. You’re never going to believe this, but um—”

“Can I see it?”

He tried to meet your eyes as he took it from you, but you couldn’t seem to look away from the words on the paper. Your mind was reeling.

Robin returned just as Eddie held the papers out in front of him, and she steadied herself with a hand on his back to read over his shoulder.

Steve meandered over; his curiosity officially piqued at what you were all huddled together about.

“What’s it say?” He had a smoke bobbing between his lips and his hands in his pockets. “Did I win the lottery or somethin’?”

He chuckled, but then you all turned to him in unison, unblinking, mouths agape.

“Yeah man,” a smile curled on Eddie’s lips. “Actually, you kinda did.”

—------

Charlene was on the plane to Hawaii when she read the newspaper article.

A glass of first-class champagne and a window to her right, an empty aisle seat to her left.

There he was, right on the front page of The Hawkins Post:

Steve.

In a bigger city, a business changing hands could fly under the radar, but in a small town, it was newsworthy when a local biker and bouncer becomes a business owner overnight.

A Cinderella story, the reporter called it.

The cover photo was of him out on the sidewalk, standing next to the red door entrance to the Velvet Hammer. Shana was in the photo with him, as were Robin, Jackie, Erika, and you.

Not pictured was Eddie Munson, whom the article mentioned Steve had chosen to take on as a partner.

The article talked about their plans for the Hammer, including bringing in a tattoo studio to the vacant storage space next door.

She ran her finger over his face on the newsprint.

It wasn’t until the end of the article that she got the wind knocked out of her:

“Steve and his longtime partner, Astrid Bautista, are expecting their first child together in the spring.”

She hadn’t expected that.

She had to look away and take a generous gulp of champagne.

Her eyes got a little wet and her vision blurred, but she read it again.

“Did you miss me?” Billy sank into the seat next to her with his sunglasses on and a white shirt unbuttoned almost to the waist of his jeans. He smiled around the pink gum he was chewing and craned his neck to see what she was reading, but she folded the paper hastily and turned it over.

She didn’t answer him, she just stared out the window over the clouds and tried to forget she ever felt a thing.

------

authors note: wow, we did it. This is my first fic series to finish ever 😭 If you've made it this far, you know how much this story and the characters have evolved since those first couple chapters. If this were an actual novel, I'd go back and make it all sync up, give it more continuity, and reveal nicknames like War Machine and Taz earlier in the game. But the cool thing about posting this way for a fandom is that you, the reader, are able to see in real time how the characters develop a mind of their own and take over the story in a way not even the writer can predict. In this case specifically, you can also see how I went from having no idea how to write a reader insert fic to becoming more and more comfortable with it.

I never had any intention of making Charlene a villain. She was literally based off of the wealthy woman in the Bruce Springsteen video for his song I'm on Fire. Just a gal who had a crush on her mechanic. Some of you voiced that you wished Charlene could get killed, or hurt somehow, and for those of you, you can trust that she is hurting. Knowing that Steve will be having a family with someone else is a deep wound.

I've had several requests for a separate biker Steve story with a new reader, and until two chapters ago, I fully intended to follow through on that. But the more I wrote him with Astrid, the more I felt it was wrong to keep them apart. If you are a fan of their love story, I highly recommend visiting THIS masterlist from @texasblues who created Astrid's character. But I do plan to bring a slightly different biker Steve back in a new au, stay tuned 🥰

This of course, is not the end. I plan to drop an epilogue on you all when you least expect it, and it will take place a year or two after the events here. If you are a friend of mine, you will laugh at this because whenever I say I'm going to write an epilogue, I never do. But this time I mean it.

I can't express in words how much your comments, asks, and messages about this story have meant, and will always mean to me. I was living through one of the darkest years of my life when I joined tumblr back in April and started writing this fic, and you all have held me together, whether you realize it or not. I love you and am deeply grateful for you all.

Taglist: @notsobubblybaby @unfocused81 @aysheashea @etherealglimmer@manicmagicmayhem @dream-a-little-nightmare@chaoticgood-munson @emxcast @rhirojo @bexreadstoomuch @micheledawn1975 @falling-solar-system@secretdryrose

@whatwedontdointheshadows @miarosso @seventhlevelofhell @corrodedcoffincumslut @lofaewrites @goldyghoul @chloe-6123 @kelsiegrin @chelebelletx @stylesxmunson @kurdtbean@dandelionnfluff @clincallyonline17 @tlclick73 @eddiemunson95 @sidthedollface2 @hideoutside @truffleshuffle12 @tenthmoon @texasblues@emilyslutface@mmunson86@onegirlmanytales@laylaloves-ed@dashingdeb16@eddiiiieeee @ick90 @dashingdeb16 @polyestermonster @trixyvixx @atomickaratel8dy @kiyastrf94 @allthingsjoeq @eddiesxangel @razzieth @corrodeddeadlydoll @erinekc @angietherose @sllooney @writinginthetwilight @moonbeamsandmayhem @brianamunson92 @joannamuns9n @bellalillyrose @alba8688 @chevelle724

#Eddie Munson #biker!eddie #biker!steve #I'm on Fire #final chapter #the ties that bind #Eddie Munson series #Eddie Munson fic #Spotify

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prettyshon10 · 6 months

Text

Major shoutout to the voice actors, because that scream Armin let out after he got his memories back…

#attack on titan #final chapter #aot #shingeki no kyojin #eren yeager #armin arlert #season 4

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thatsmzbitchtoyou · 14 days

Text

Marriage of Convenience Chapter 5 FINAL

Warnings: smut, slight physical violence

All during dinner, with scorched steak, overly creamy mashed potatoes and bruised pears, Bucky and Y/N were insatiable. Bucky kept a hand on her thigh at all times under the table, every once in a while his hand traveling up closer to in between her legs. Y/N would stand up and act like there wasn’t enough room to get out quickly, and would brush her breasts against his shoulder as she would get up and sit back down. When everything was cleared, cleaned, and everyone went back to their individual bunks in the back houses, Y/N went upstairs, buzzing with excitement and a little scared with anticipation.

When she reached the bedroom she took a deep breath and opened the door. At the end of the bed stood Bucky, shirtless, his underwear low on his hips, his hair wet from a quick wash.

“Hey sweetheart,” he greeted her as she stepped in and closed the door behind her.

“Hey, darlin’,” she said. He smirked at the pet name.

“Come here,” he instructed as he faced her. Y/N walked over to him, her hands clenching at her sides. “Just relax, Y/N,” he chuckled at the tense look on her face. His hands ran up her arms and massaged her shoulders. “If you’re still not sure we don’t have to.”

“No, no I want to,” Y/N said quickly. “I’m not sure…what to do now.”

“How about we start from where we left off earlier?” Bucky suggested, his fingers moving towards the buttons on her dress.

“Okay,” she whispered as she nodded. She watched him unbutton her dress all the way down until she could slip out of it. When she was in her undergarments she helped him unbutton and unstrap everything until she was naked in front of him. Bucky admired her, his eyes raking over every curve and dimple. His scrutiny made her shy and she started trying to cover herself.

“No, sweetheart,” he pushed her hands away from her chest. “You’re beautiful.”

He led her over to the bed and had her sit down on the edge. “I’m going to take these off, alright?” he asked, hooking his fingers under the top rim of his underwear. Y/N nodded. He stepped back a little and slipped them down his legs until he stood bare in front of her. Y/N stared at him wide eyed. Y/N had seen a few penises on accident before as some men were leaving a creek after a swim, and thought it an odd appendage. But those men didn’t compare to Bucky in size or length.

She didn’t know why but her mouth started watering and she wanted to touch it. “May I?” she asked, her hand slowly reaching forward.

“Yeah,” Bucky said, stepping back towards her until he was standing between her legs. She touched it with her finger first, running it up his length and down again, just getting used to the feel of it. She then wrapped her fingers around him, holding his cock gently in her hand, noting how small her hand looked compared to it. His cock started to harden then, jumping a little.

“Is that what happens when it’s ready?” Y/N asked innocently, looking up at him.

“Yes,” Bucky breathed. “It’s, uh, getting excited.”

Y/N giggled at that. Bucky covered her hand on his cock with his hand and started to make her move her hand, showing her what to do. “That’s what helps it get harder…ah,” he gasped as she gripped it a little harder. “Not too hard, sweetheart.”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “Is that all?”

“Well, it’s also nice when, uh, when it’s sucked on,” Bucky let go of her hand and let her keep tugging on him, her hand getting used to the movement.

“Suck on it? How do you even put your whole mouth on it?” she asked incredulously. Bucky’s smirk widened.

“You sure know how to make a guy feel special, sweetheart,” Bucky praised her. “You don’t have to, it’s just something that feels nice.”

Y/N took it as a challenge and leaned forward. She kissed the tip of it, making him gasp again. She opened her mouth and licked it from the tip to the base of it and back.

“Shit, sweetheart, that’s good,” Bucky’s eyes shut tight as he tried not to thrust.

Y/N opened her mouth wider until she could wrap her lips around the tip, then gave him a suck. Bucky’s knees almost buckled as he steadied himself with his hands on her shoulders. She gained confidence as she started moving back and forth with him in her mouth, sucking and licking his cock slowly, getting used to how it felt on her tongue.

“Fuck, that feels amazing,” Bucky moaned, his fingers now skimming along her jaw as she widened her mouth as much as she could, taking as much of him in her mouth until he hit the back of her throat. She gagged lightly, one hand now coming to grip his thigh, the other still moving along the part of his cock she couldn’t get in her mouth. “You’re a natural sweetheart, goddamn.”

Bucky involuntarily thrust into her mouth, making her jaw close. “Oooh, no teeth. I’m sorry, that was my fault,” he said as he gripped her jaw. “It just feels so good. You’re so good at this.” Y/N hummed at his praise, the vibrations on his cock making him shiver. “God, if you keep doing that I won’t last,” he muttered and then pulled himself slowly out of her mouth. Y/N’s eyes were a little teary from gagging, but she smiled up at him when he looked down at her.

“Fuck,” he whispered as he dipped down to kiss her. He helped her move up the bed until they were both on it comfortably. He settled between her legs as he started kissing and sucking on her breasts like he did earlier. While one of his hands was playing with one breast his other hand slipped down to her lower lips, searching for that special spot again. She was already wet, making Bucky groan as his fingers slipped until his middle finger found her clit, rubbing it in quick circles and then dipping that finger deep inside her. Y/N’s hips bucked against his hand as she broke the kiss.

“Oh god,” she sighed, her hands running down to his chest. She scratched her nails down until her fingers found his nipples and gave them small flicks like he’d done to hers.

“AH, shit, sweetheart,” Bucky’s hips trembled. “You ready to try?”

“Yes,” Y/N pleaded, the ache in her core to be filled by something getting worse by the minute.

“I’ll go slow,” Bucky promised as he positioned himself between her legs. He held his cock, giving himself a few pumps with his hand, before he lined himself up. He pushed forward just enough until the tip was pushing inside. Y/N tensed at the intrusion, which was much bigger than his fingers. “It’s okay, relax,” Bucky said as he stopped, letting her get used to the first bit. “Just breathe.” He kissed her again, distracting her from the pressure. He pushed about an inch further in, making Y/N grip his shoulders. “You okay?” he asked, watching her face as he pulled away from the kiss.

“Yeah,” Y/N sighed.

Bucky reached his hand back down between them and started rubbing her clit again. The distraction was enough for her to feel more pleasure rather than pain, and she squirmed as the tension deep within her started to build. As he flicked her clit he pushed further, getting closer to being fully seated. Right as she was beginning to reach her first orgasm he pushed all the way in, making her arch her back as her pussy fluttered around him.

“Ah! Shit! Fuck!” she cried as her fingers dug into his back as she came. Bucky willed himself not to cum, as good as it felt with her squeezing him.

“Doing so good, sweetheart, taking me so well,” Bucky praised her as she calmed down. “I’m going to start moving, okay?”

“Please,” Y/N moaned, the fullness making her lightheaded.

Bucky smiled and slowly pulled back, then watched her face as he thrust back in. Y/N’s mouth fell open in a silent moan, her hands slipping to grip his upper arms as her legs hooked themselves behind his back. The angle helped him slide a little deeper, making her whimper when he hit a certain spot.

Bucky kissed her again as he went a little faster, always checking to make sure Y/N wasn’t in pain. “You feel so good, sweetheart,” he kissed all over her face. “How do you feel?”

“So fuuulllllll…” Y/N whined. “Don’t stop.”

He felt her flutter around him again, making him drop his head to her shoulder. “Fuck, you about to cum again, Y/N? You like it when I’m so deep inside you like this?” He punctuated his words with a harder thrust.

“OH GOD, keep doing that,” Y/N cried, looking down to watch him pull in and out of her. She unhooked her legs so she could plant her feet down on the bed.

“Goddammit, yes ma’am,” Bucky smirked as he angled himself up a bit and then started pounding into her. The sound of their mingled breaths and moans and the skin slapping on skin filled the room. Bucky kissed, licked or sucked every inch of skin he could reach as he increased the pace. Y/N’s moans became higher and higher pitched as Bucky kept hitting that one spot deep inside.

“Buck…it’s happening again,” she gasped, her hands flying up to grip the pillows above her head. “I’m…gonna…”

“Go ahead, Y/N, I’m right there, right…there! Shit…I love you,” Bucky growled into her ear as he hooked one of her legs over his hip.

“Love…you…” she said, and then she screamed his name as she came again. This one was even bigger than before. Bucky felt like he was locked inside of her as she came, squeezing so hard like she was literally milking it out of him as he came with her. Her body shook and her legs stiffened as he filled her up, a string of expletives and praises falling from his lips as he kissed her again and again.

When Y/N felt like she came back to herself she opened her eyes and found Bucky already staring at her. He gave her a small smile and nuzzled her nose with his nose. “How did that feel, sweetheart?” he asked, a little mirth underlying the tone of his voice.

Y/N giggled. “Hm…I don’t know.” Bucky’s eyes narrowed at her. “I might have to try it again, see how I feel.”

Bucky scrunched his nose at her joke and thrust inside of her again. Her eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of him leaking out of her as he brushed against the deep spot inside her again. “That’s what I thought, you tease,” Bucky chuckled.

“It was amazing, Bucky. I get it now,” Y/N sighed.

Bucky huffed a laugh, kissing her cheeks and nose and then her mouth. “I love you, sweetheart.”

“I love you, darlin’,” she whispered.

***

10 months later

“I got here as soon as I could,” Dr. Banner panted as he ran up towards the house.

“Hurry!” Steve pushed him through the door, directing him to the bedroom upstairs.

The men were all gathered in the main house, sitting or pacing around the front sitting room, waiting anxiously. Today was the day. Another loud scream shook the house, making Luis cry harder as Diego and Joaquin comforted him and continued praying.

Another hour went by when the screams died down. They all stood stock still, straining to hear anything. Then… “wwaahhh!” A baby cry. They all burst into tears, some of them whooping and singing a celebratory song, dancing around the furniture.

Y/N was exhausted, but it was finally over. At the foot of the bed stood Bucky, holding their newborn baby. Steve was at the head of the bed next to Y/N, brushing away the sweat on her face and congratulating her. Dr. Banner was still between her legs, cleaning up the afterbirth and making sure everything was safe and in order.

“What is it?” Y/N sighed, her tired eyes drooping as her body started to relax.

Bucky looked at her with wet eyes. He wasn’t one to cry normally, so it was a strange sight for her to see. He walked over to the opposite side of Steve and sat next to her on the bed. He leaned down and set the baby on Y/N’s chest.

“It’s a girl,” Bucky cried, adjusting the blanket around her as he smiled adoringly at his two girls.

“A girl,” Y/N breathed, gazing at the tiny being. She was pink and looked squished, and yet Y/N fell in love with her instantaneously.

“She’s beautiful,” Steve stared in wonderment at the baby. “Congratulations, you two.”

“Thank you,” Bucky smiled at his friend, squeezing Steve’s arm across the bed.

“What will we name her?” Bucky asked Y/N as he laid next to her while Dr. Banner started cleaning up his medicine bag.

“What do you think of Luisa?” Y/N asked, giving him a hopeful smile.

“That’s perfect,” Bucky agreed.

“Luisa…Juniper. Luisa Juniper Barnes?”

Bucky’s lips quivered as he watched his baby squirm in his wife’s arms. “Yes. My Luisa.”

A few hours later once everything and everyone was cleaned up Y/N came down the stairs with their baby in her arms and Bucky and Steve right behind her. All the men were still there, and upon seeing who came down all immediately stood up and watched her with wide smiles. “Mis amores (my loves), this is my daughter, Luisa Juniper Barnes.”

They all gasped at hearing her first name and looked at Luis, who had to sit down from being overcome with emotions. They each approached her and gave her hugs, kisses, and greeted the baby, congratulating her and Bucky. A little later she let Steve hold her, which reduced him to a cooing and crying mess. Y/N looked around at all the people in her life. Luis, Diego, Joaquin, Santiago, Emiliano, Jorge, Pedro, Oscar, Steve, Bucky, and now her little Luisa. She thanked whatever great spirit was out in the world that helped in joining her and Bucky together to create this beautiful life she lived.

**picture is from Pinterest, A.I. generated, so no known "artist" or "creator"**

@wintrsoldrluvr @vicmc624 @itvy5601 @mrs-bucky-barnes-73

I'm so glad so many of you liked this one! I'm just on a roll writing all the AUs and ideas that I've wanted to see written about Bucky. If any of you have requests or ideas, for Bucky or maybe some other characters, please let me know. The next one is a priest!Bucky fic and I'm excited for y'all to read it. Love you!!! <3

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #marvel #smut #cowboy!bucky barnes x reader #cowboy!bucky barnes #wild west #chapter 5 #final chapter

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damn-stark · 4 months

Text

Chapter 35 Can’t catch me now

Final chapter of Cherry

A/N: Thank you, I’m going to cry now that it’s over

Warning- FLUFF, mentions of pregnancy and birth complications, angst, and swearing

Takes place during- The final chapters special 2

Pairing- Jean Kirstein x fem!reader

————

What does he mean by talk?

Does he have a girlfriend back in Marley? One Connie, Levi, or Pieck mentioned?

Or maybe he’s going to say that he’s totally just over you. He doesn’t love you anymore.

You can’t take it, the anxiety is killing you.

“You look nice,” you interject and hide your nervousness well. “I like your hair, it’s different, it’s good.” You peer over your shoulder and flash Jean a smile.

He meets your gaze and a soft smirk tugs on his lips. “Thanks. You look nice now—I mean you look beautiful, but nice because the last time I saw you, you looked—”

“Bad?” You say to him with a small teasing smile.

Jean squints and parts his lips to argue, but you cut in again.

“It’s okay, it’s true,” you assure him. “I was in a bad place. Now I’m not. I’m okay now. Better than good actually, I’m great.”

You slide the door open to a secluded cabin on the train and walk in first before he follows you inside and closes the door behind him, letting you finally face each other.

“So I’ve read,” he says.

You study his handsome face and smile wider. “You look very nice. Is that okay to say?” You ask to get what you want to know from him. “Or should I hold back because of a special someone?” You wiggle your eyebrows and hope it isn't true.

Jean scoffs and shakes his head. “Nah…I tried it,” he admits, and you feel your heart clench—“but none of them worked out, I guess,” he rolls out and glances at the ground as he puts his hands in his pockets. “They weren’t you.”

Your heart skips a beat and your eyes widen. “What?” You gasp with disbelief.

Jean looks up at you and exhales deeply before he pulls his hands out and strides over to you with confidence. “I know I’ve been an ass and not written, but I wanted to give you space.”

“Jean,” you try to interject, but he grabs your shoulders and looks at you with a soft look that makes your face begin to burn.

“Listen okay?” He continues and looks into your eyes. “I love you, I always will no matter what, but I don’t want to just be your friend. I can’t be just a friend. I can be your best friend if we’re together, but I can’t live my life and pretend that we didn’t live a life together. That I didn’t love you with my entire being. I can't do that, I'm not that big of a person.”

Tears fill your eyes, but they’re not born from an ache, they’re tears of disbelief and shock.

“So,” he goes on softly and slowly places his hands on your cheeks. “That’s why I'm saying it now, it might be brazen and too much for you, but it’s the truth and if I didn’t say it I would be bothered and mean, you don’t deserve that. And well,” he sighs. “Too much shit has happened for us to be patient, and I’m afraid that if I continue to be patient, I won’t be able to say what has been stuck in my throat for years.”

You smile softly and gently slide your hands over to hold his arms. “Jean,” you whisper. “I love you. I do. I never stopped loving you. I never thought about anyone else but you, but,” you cut in and make his breath falter. “You can’t rush into this. We’ve hardly talked over the past 3 years, I don’t know you anymore. You don’t know me. We know a past of each other, but not who we turned into. You understand? I mean what if you don’t even like who I am now? I don’t want you to waste your time with me, I—”

“Shut up,” Jean cuts you off and pulls you closer to him, making your breath hitch and your eyes fall on his lips—“Just shut up you’re talking nonsense. All you’re saying is crap because I do know you,” he says. “I’ve read all the letters you sent me. All the letters you sent our friends, and I’m looking at you now and all I see is my future. I’ve fought for a long time, I know life isn’t long, and I don’t want to wait. We can get to know each other as we date. Just please be with me. I miss you.”

Your bottom lip trembles and all you feel is your heart race as butterflies flutter like crazy inside you.

Your life doesn’t feel complete because Levi still isn’t with you, but you feel safe and like the stars finally returned to orbit to give light to the world. Yes, you did heal from your deep wounds without him, you couldn’t have him with you, but the one thing that didn’t change throughout it all was your feelings for him; they burn just as hot, and drive you just as crazy as the first time.

“I miss you too,” you redirect sweetly. “I love you too. I’ve only loved you, I will only love you. I can’t love anyone else but you,” you confess, making him smile and lean in.

Yet just as you’re going to relish in the taste of his lips finally on yours, a knock raps on the door.

“Y/N?”

Eric?

Eric!

“What do you want?” You sneer and don’t bother to open the door right away.

“Ben is looking for you. He says it’s urgent.”

You groan and look at Jean one last time. “Let’s continue this later, hm?” You ask.

Jean sighs deeply and has no choice but to give in. “Fine. Just,” he trails off and slams his lips on yours to give you one quick but deep kiss before he pulls back to open the door for you.

“Hey man,” Eric greets Jean with a smug smile.

You storm out of the room and Eric follows after you.

“Why are you still mad, huh? Did I interrupt something?”

When you step out to the main cabin you stop in front of Ben and quickly interject. “What do you want?”

Ben looks away from Reiner and slowly looks at you with concern. “Do you have an extra pack of cigarettes? I left mine in my other coat.”

You clench your fist and give him a tightlipped smile. “That was urgent?” You say through gritted teeth.

Ben nods and glances at Jean sitting down before looking back at you and giving you a cheeky smile. “Yes.”

“I do not carry cigarettes because the last box you had me carry you finished last week. Am I done now?” You sneer. “Or?”

Ben glances at Eric sitting down next to him and they share a look before he nods. “Yeah.”

You let out a deep huff and turn to return to your seat. Jean tries to settle down next to you, but you quickly throw your arms over the empty seat. “Sorry, this seat is taken,” you let him know sweetly.

Jean turns and looks at you with a pointed look. “What do you mean? It’s empty,” he points out.

“It’s Honey’s seat,” you sass him. “She demands to have her own seat. Sorry.” You smile and point at the seat across from you “You can sit there. Mikasa is with Armin. And Eric—”

Just as you say his name your brother slides in the seat across from you as if trying to cockblock Jean from even looking at you.

“…is there,” you finish under your breath and then look back at Jean still baffled by your cat's privileges.

“You’re not serious,” Jean retorts.

“She’s so serious,” Eric rebuttals for you. “Her cat thinks it’s royalty or something. It’s weird.”

Jean glances at your brother and then at the empty seat, and is going to ignore you, but just as he’s going to sit down, your brown cat comes over and hops back on her seat next to yours. She sees Jean too close so she looks at him with her green eyes and lets out a long meow.

“See,” you exclaim with a smirk. “Her own seat. I don’t make the rules.” You shrug.

Jean rolls his eyes and picks up the cat, making her let out an annoyed meow.

“I bought you damn thing now hold it before I accidentally sit on it,” he sasses and plops the cat on your lap as you watch him sit down with bewilderment.

Over the past 2 years, you've been breaking your head wondering, and constantly asking Levi and the others to reveal who gifted you the cat, but no one would say a thing.

Sure sometimes you did think Jean was the one, but since he barely wrote you back he quickly fell off that list. For some time you thought it was Reiner since he seemed to still be fawning over you, but he would’ve said it, so your guess was Levi or Mikasa, but they never said a thing so you were left wondering for 2 years. And now you finally know, and you should’ve known.

“You got her for me?” You probe softly as you hold onto Honey.

Jean drifts his gaze to the corner of his eyes and looks at you as if it’s no big deal. “Yeah,” he responds nonchalantly. “Made Mikasa pick her out to give it to you.”

You scoff softly in disbelief and lean closer to him. “Why didn’t you say so?” You press him.

Jean shrugs. “I was. The cat is a…apology present for how I acted before you left, but then at the last minute,” he sighs. “I chickened out and thought it was better if you didn’t know until I saw you.”

Your heart skips a beat and your smile tugs to a grin before you quickly let go of the cat to lean over and throw your arms around Jean.

It's kind of an awkward hug since you're sitting side by side, but you still hold onto him.

“Thank you,” you whisper softly and gently run your fingers through the ends of his hair, making him shiver and squeeze you gently.

“I knew you'd like it,” he whispers in your ear as he tilts his head closer to you to draw in a small breath as he catches a whiff of your fragrance clinging to your skin. “You smell nice,” he shares.

You smirk and slide your hands down to feel his biceps hiding under his suit. “You do too,” you redirect smugly before you pull back and hug your cat again.

“You know,” Eric adds and taps the table in between you and him. “Back in the city, there’s this guy named Fedric, who is heads over heels for my sister here.”

“Eric,” you try to cut him off.

“No, no, just listen,” he ignores you and smirks. “He’s, like, tall, and buff and has crazy blue eyes. I’m telling her to give it a shot, but she refused. Maybe, you,” he points at Jean. “Can advise her otherwise, considering you’re her best friend.” He shrugs.

You glare at your brother and kick him in the shin under the table, he flinches, but he keeps on a straight face.

“Why don’t you date him,” Jean rebuttals sassily. “Considering the way you’re describing him.”

You snort and smile at your brother, but Eric doesn’t share the same enthusiasm, he fakes laughs instead and mutters. “Funny, funny.”

You snicker at him and then turn to continue talking to Jean. “I hope you got enough sleep—”

“Hey!” Connie cuts in and slides into the empty seat next to Eric. “Does your cat have a diamond hanging off her collar, or am I going crazy?”

You lift your cat and nod. “Yeah, she does. Isn’t she so pretty?” You smile.

Connie squints and then he bursts out laughing. “You’re so weird! It’s a cat!”

You roll your eyes and set your cat down on your lap. “So?” You quip. “What's your point?”

“My point is that it’s an animal,” he explains himself. “It’s weird that you put that shit on her.”

You don’t get his point nor do you want to spend your time arguing, so you drop the subject and return to what you didn’t finish saying. “Anyway! I hope you guys got enough sleep, you guys have a busy schedule today. Plus, a little welcome back celebration hosted by me.”

“What?” Connie gasps.

You smile proudly and nod. “Yeah, after you get finished with all your introduction meetings, we’ll go get ready, have dinner, and then go to a cantina. How fun is that?” You exclaim.

“It was supposed to be a surprise,” Eric mutters. “Mikasa is going to get annoyed.”

You flick your wrist to wave him off. “It’s okay. I planned it. I couldn’t hold it in! There’s gonna be dancing, music, old military friends, new friends we’ve made, and drinks. It’s gonna be fun! And who knows Connie, maybe finally you’ll become a man tonight.” You smile sweetly and bat your lashes.

Connie snickers. “Cherry girl, I am a man. I left many ladies crying back in Marley.”

You scrunch your nose in disgust as you don’t find this funny anymore. “That’s gross.”

“You started it,” he snaps.

You groan and glance over at Jean to ask if it’s the same for him, but you catch him already looking at you with a soft smile on his face that makes you wonder.

“What?” You query.

Jean blinks in surprise as he snaps from his stupor, but he doesn’t grow flustered, or lose his smile, he simply shakes his head and interjects softly. “Nothing. You’ve just changed, that's all.”

Your face begins to burn and you’re the one that grows flustered now. “Well,” you whisper. “Yeah.” You laugh and nod. “Yeah. And you don’t stutter anymore. You used to stutter. Is it all the practice back in Marley?” You tease him.

Jean scoffs and grows cocky. “Natural talent, that's all.”

You giggle and shake your head. “Natural talent my ass. I know you, you’re not as smooth as you think you are.”

“Am so,” he quips and tries to slide his hand around your seat's headrest, but his arm slips and falls on your shoulders. He quickly tries to recover but it was too late you proved your point.

“Super smooth,” you say sarcastically.

Jean shrugs and nudges your shoulder with his fingers hovering over it. “You like it.”

You can't help but smile as you look away. And the moment you do you catch both Connie and Eric watching Jean and you with disgust, so you ignore their negativity and just look out the window with a happy smile on your face.

Levi is still missing but you feel content, and your heart feels at ease with the rest of your family finally back home.

——

*LATER THAT NIGHT*

After a long day of waiting for Jean and the others to go through their long meetings, and after a short and kind of chaotic dinner you’re finally living through the part of the night you’ve looked forward to all day, considering you weren’t in their dreadful meetings.

You can’t say that you can party like when you were a soldier—it’s not that you don’t enjoy it, you just can’t bring yourself to get your mind too clouded just in case, but! You do enjoy the music and the vibe!

You just have to back away when Connie and your brother Eric try to force more wine down your throat.

“Jean can do it, I believe you,” you throw him under so he can take your place.

“Hey! Hey!” Connie exclaims and points his finger at you. “Those are not the rules. Coin flipped on you, you, drink!”

He's incredibly drunk.

“Hey, hey!” Eric cuts in and stands up. “You can’t force my sister to drink!” He exclaims and faces Connie with a pointed look.

“Whoa—”

“I can! Drink girl!” He shouts at you and swings his cup at you, causing Connie to burst out laughing.

“That’s what I'm talking about!” Connie exclaims and jumps up to throw his arm around Eric, making them both sway.

You roll your eyes but you still can’t help but smile softly over the fact that they’re getting along well.

However, you use this moment that they’re distracted to back away and escape before they keep pressing you to drink, leaving Jean to deal with them instead.

Sure there’s only so many places to hide in a small place, but you keep moving in between the crowd and actually catch Armin and Mikasa trying to dance along to the music. However, they’re tipsy so it’s not going well.

And luckily they don’t notice you so you keep moving along, but stop when you spot Reiner all by himself in some secluded corner of the cantina.

You haven’t talked to him since he got here, and you’ve been meaning to. You’ve been dreading it but you want to talk to him—should you though?

Yes! You’ve grown up, matured, pondered, and had three years to be upset! You need to make peace with this. He’s the last piece left.

So you walk over to him and casually sit beside him as you keep your eyes on Mikasa and Armin dancing.

“There’s a lot of pretty women out there,” you interject and smile proudly upon seeing your cousin's joy—“Why aren't you dancing? Do you have a girlfriend back in Marley?”

Reiner scoffs. “No,” he mutters. “I can’t seem to find the right one…” he trails off and you feel his stare on you. “You, do you have a…boyfriend?” He whispers hesitantly.

You shake your head. “No, but…” you sigh and glance at Jean, and catch him looking back at you. “…I have my eye on someone.”

You smile at Jean and look away to finally look at Reiner who hasn’t taken his eyes off you.

“Hm,” he hums and averts his gaze to clear his throat before he changes the subject. “Uh, how are you? I mean with everything. The reason why you left,” he says.

You let out a deep breath and shrug. “I’m…fine,” you hesitate to answer. “I’m not angry anymore,” you mention and continue because regardless of other things, he was still there. Once. But enough to motivate you to escape.

“I have nightmares here and there, they won’t go away. And sometimes…it crawls up on me, the fear that someone is around trying to get me…but,” you sigh and smile softly. “I’m okay now. I’m actually doing quite a lot with Historia and my brothers for the Underground. So I’m good.”

A small smile crawls on Reiner’s lips and he nods softly. “That’s good. I’m happy for you,” he says softly and averts his gaze.

“Thank you,” you whisper and shift in your seat to face him with determination to finally address the one thing that matters between him and you. “Reiner.”

Said man slowly meets your gaze and seems to look hopeful.

“I…can forgive you,” you jump straight to the point so he doesn’t get some false expectations about where this is going. “I can forgive you for taking away my best friend. I can forgive you for looking me in the eye all those times and lying to me, I can forgive you because I don’t want to hate you. Because I don’t want that in my heart anymore, but,” exhale deeply and look at him with a long frown. “I won’t forget. I’ll never forget what you did. And I know it might be stupid maybe, petty, but you still lied, and you still took him away from me. He was my best friend. I loved him,” your voice quivers. “And I…liked you, and it hurt.”

Reiner looks as if he was just shot, even though he expected you to say this, your words still wound him and finally make him realize that he and you will always live in the past.

“I’m sorry,” he mutters and scoots forward, making you raise your chin and nod in comprehension.

“Yes, I know you are and I forgive you. I can see us maybe being friends, but nothing else,” you admit the truth. “Do you understand?” You probe so he can get the right idea and not be delusional.

“I,” he breathes out heavily. “I understand.”

You offer him a kind smile and nod. “Good. That’s all I wanted to hear.”

Reiner looks away and quickly cuts in bluntly. “Do you love him?”

You blink in confusion and follow his line of gaze to see him looking at Jean walking over here.

“I…do,” you respond honestly and look back at Reiner curiously. “Why?” You ask.

Reiner snaps his eyes to you and leans forward to grab your hand and offer you a small smile. “Does he make you happy?” He asks.

You laugh softly. “We aren’t together at the moment, but, yes…why?” You probe.

Reiner draws in a deep breath and his smile falters. “That’s all I ask. That’s all I want for you. Even if it’s not with me.”

A pitiful frown tugs on your face. “Reiner,” you whisper.

Said man tugs his smile wider. “I’m happy for you, y/n. I really am. I hope you get everything you want out of life.”

You genuinely smile and nod. “You too, Reiner,” you redirect kindly. “You deserve it.”

Reiner breathes hitches and his smile falters, but he doesn’t break. Especially because Jean reaches the table.

“Sorry, Reiner but I need to talk to y/n,” Jean cuts in, making you let go of Reiner’s hand to twist around slowly and look at him with a quirked brow.

“Need to?” You inquire.

Jean meets your gaze and nods. “I’m not asking. Let’s go.”

Your heart skips a beat and you offer Reiner one last smile before you follow Jean outside.

“What is this about?” You probe without waiting to be away from all the noise. “Are you going to propose to me after our first day back together?” You tease and glance up at the sky, noticing the thick clouds that are quickly rolling in across the canvas, but missing the way he slowly steals a look at you.

“You know,” you add with a smile. “It’s good you didn’t have a girlfriend because I visit your mom often and have occasional lunches with her. It'd be weird.”

Jean scoffs softly. “Well it’s not really your fault, she loves you,” he reminds you of the fact. “She’d be nagging you and me if you didn’t visit.”

You look down at him and smile softly. Jean holds your gaze, and you grow the need to remind him how much you missed him even though the only time you’ve been apart since he’s gotten back was when he was in a meeting room. “I’ve missed you, Jean. I’ve missed talking to you. I…I’ve missed you.”

Jean’s lips curl to a smile. “I’ve missed you too,” he doesn’t hesitate to return to you. “Now come on, just a bit further.”

You shoot him a puzzled look but don’t question him, you just hook your arm around his, and enjoy the peace in the silence at this time of night. You relish in the moist smell of incoming rain and smile at the feeling of his surreal presence.

“You know I think Ben really likes me,” Jean interjects making you look back at him. “Eric though…I think I need to work on him.”

You giggle. “Why?” You mess with him. “We aren’t dating or anything.”

Jean stops, forcing you to do the same and look at him with a playful smirk.

“No? So what are we then?” He quips.

You shrug. “You tell me,” you counter sweetly.

Jean swallows thickly and glances down before he grabs your face and leans in to slam his lips on yours, causing you to gasp softly out of shock, even though you crave the taste of his lips.

He then pulls away to cut off this interaction, but you pull him back in to really remind yourself of the feeling of his soft lips that desperately fall in sync with yours before he takes control and leads you in for an open-mouth kiss, as if he had been starving.

Then again you can’t say you’re any different, you throw your hands around his neck and run them up to clutch onto his hair to keep his mouth on yours as you tease him for a moment, before you slide your tongue over his bottom lip for him to take it in and suck on it as his hands grab onto your face.

You try to make a sound, but he takes your breath away and all you can manage to do is pull away to catch your breath, making him lean in to press gentle kisses on the corner of your mouth.

“Jean,” you whisper between pants.

Said man pulls back and licks his lips as he holds your gaze with a darkened gaze full of lust. “What about now?” He rebuttals. “Do you know what we are now?”

You glance at his lips and smirk as you shrug again. “Tell me.”

Jean grabs your chin and tilts your head up so you can meet his gaze. “You’re mine,” he clarifies. “No amount of space or time ever changed that. Sure I was upset, but I was stupid, and now I know you leaving was for the best,” he admits. “Because look at you. I’m proud of you, my love.”

Your eyes water and your smile trembles as your heart fills with bliss.

“And I like to think I’m a better man too,” he continues. “I’ve grown, matured, and I’m finally ready for a commitment that I was not ready for then.”

You grin and he leans in to press a soft kiss on your forehead before he steps back and slides his hand down to grab yours and tug you with him. “Come,” he points up the road.

However, just as you take a step in that direction drops of rain begin to sprinkle down, making Jean stop and look up.

“We have to hurry,” he cuts in.

Alas, that sprinkle changes to a pour that makes Jean let your hand go and drop his head.

“What?” You quire and grab his arm. “What's wrong? It’s just rain.”

Jean slowly looks up and shakes his head with an annoyed look on his face. “No,” he argues. “I had this entire thing planned with the stars, flowers, and all the stuff you like, but it’s ruined now because of the rain!”

You glance up up but quickly look back down when rain falls in your eyes, and beam at Jean through the thick raindrops. “I like the rain! I like the sound, and I like the sight of it when the light reflects over it for a second before it hits the ground!” You assure him through the pattering. “So, it’s okay!”

You tug him to continue forward, but he doesn’t budge, instead, he stays there and you notice his lips are parted and he’s looking at you with a softened gaze that makes you confused.

“What?” You ask. “What’s wrong?”

Jean's smile wobbles before he blurts, “marry me!”

Your confusion falls and you gasp.

Jean continues to grab your hands and falls on one knee. “I-I know this is our first day back together, we have a lot to catch up on, but I don’t want to waste any more of my time without you,” he exclaims. “I love you. Deeply. I can’t imagine my life without you in it, actually, every time I picture my life, you’re in it. I want to spend the future we fought so hard for to be spent with you. Forever. So please…marry me,” he whispers.

You wipe the tears and the rain off your face, but it’s pointless because more tears and rain stream down your face, leaving you drenched. So you just proceed to throw yourself on him and cry on his shoulder out of pure joy your heart is oozing out.

“Yes,” you cry happily. “I do. I want to spend my life with you too! I want forever with you.” You pull back and grab his wet face, “I love you, Jean Kirstein. You are my sun, you are my moon and my stars. Without you, it’d be like living underground in the dark again. So yes, I want forever with you too.”

Tears mix with the rain on Jean's face and his smile turns to a wide grin before he seals your distance with a passionate kiss, assuring you both of your desires.

——

*15 YEARS LATER*

The air underground isn’t as thick and suffocating as it once was. That stench of moisture, piss, and dirt has somewhat disappeared—that or you’ve grown used to the smell after thirty years.

Then again you would have heard complaints by now if it reeked under here. They wouldn't have kept quiet about that.

Regardless, the darkness underground doesn’t lurk in every corner like before. The houses that once stood tall are left abandoned and only used for criminals and the homeless.

6 years ago thanks to Historia’s help, your brothers, and you were finally able to give everyone a better life they deserve, a chance to live a longer life and not be stuck underground because of greedy people who got your ancestors stuck down here in the first place. Now only criminals run their businesses down here in a crumbling abandoned society.

And the only reason you’re down here is because you want to show your children where you and Levi were born, and that life can be tough but you can move past it, like Levi and Furlan did with you and their lives. Sure your kids don’t like the idea of being down here in a dirty place, they’re used to the sun on their skin, the grass under their toes, and the wind unfurling over their flesh. All they grew up with was a life of full bellies, common colds under warm beds, and attainable medicine. Jean nor you ever let them know suffering.

“When are we leaving? Eirene is coming over today!” You hear your first complaint, and of course, it’s from your six-year-old daughter, Star. She’s just like Jean. Even if Levi says she’s Kenny’s twin, in both appearance and personality.

Which, you don’t know if you should be offended by that or not. He’s your father, but there were also many things wrong with him.

“Aunt Mikasa and your cousin Eirene are not coming over until way later,” you correct Star. “We’ll be back home by then, so,” you sigh. “Why don’t you come help your grandpa here, hm?”

Levi peers over at you with a side glare, so you counter with a smirk.

“Okay!” Star exclaims and leaves her father's side to run over and throw herself on Levi’s lap which is the opposite of what you wanted her to do.

“Girl,” you argue, “that’s not—”

“It’s okay,” Levi cuts you off. “She’s fine.”

“Yeah,” Star groans and lays her head back against Levi’s shoulder. “He’s too heavy, I can’t push him. My arms will break! They almost did so yesterday.”

Jean and you share a teasing look, and just as you're going to play along, someone else cuts in.

“That’s impossible! You can’t break your arms by pushing a wheelchair, isn’t that right, pa?”

Levi shrugs. “I don’t know Lucian, I saw it happen once. But I also saw someone’s hands fall off because they were lazy.”

Lucian, your ten-year-old snickers, whilst Star’s jaw drops.

“That’s impossible,” she argues this time with a pout. “Right…dad?” She peers over at the man walking by your side and her blue eyes fill with worry.

Yet he does a horrible job at consoling her in between his stifled laughs. “Yeah,” he assures her. “Not true…maybe.”

Star sees through his mask hiding his stifled laugh and glares at him before she turns around and hugs Levi’s neck.

“You need a better poker face,” you scold Jean. “You suck and I’m a bad liar.”

Jean clears his throat and shifts the baby in his arms to his other side to let his eyes fully take you in. “I didn’t start it.”

“Yeah and we both know she can’t take it,” you rebuttal.

Jean laughs at the ground before he looks at the baby on his hip to offer her a teasing smile.

“No one appreciates a good joke do they?” He talks to the 8-month-old baby watching him with her deep brown eyes wide-eyed, and full of curiosity. “Will you?” He asks and scratches her little chin, making her laugh.

You smile in awe and grab his arm to lean over towards your baby. “Is your daddy being mean to you, Marceline? Tickling your cute chins, hm?”

The baby coos and stretches her fat arms over to try and grab you, but Jean hugs her against him so you wouldn’t take his little girl from him.

Marceline squeals and pushes herself up to hook her arms around his neck, making Jean press a kiss on her tiny dark curls.

And it seems she knows the reaction she got and what it means because she snuggles her face in the crook of his neck like she tends to do when he gives her any kind of affection. She just loves Jean, even if he and you aren't her biological parents.

Actually, you adopted her not so long ago, six years after the doctor told you that having a third baby would kill you due to your weak immune system. That was actually the reason why you were left in a bad state for weeks after you had Star.

Jean said he didn't want to put your life at risk and live through his worst fear, so you opted for adopting a few months back. And albeit you did worry that she wouldn’t be able to bond with either of you because of the lack of blood connection, you were proven wrong; the three of you instantly connected, and Star and Lucian didn't fail to do the same. Albeit it did take Star some time to get used to her new sister…she…hated her for some time.

But now! She adores her, even if she gets jealous of all the attention the baby gets.

“That’s no fair,” you complain and hug your husband's arm. “She likes you better.”

Jean turns his head to drop his eyes on you and shakes his head with a smirk tugging on his lips nonetheless. “You know that’s not true...but, it’s probably true.”

You know well it’s all a joke, you just like to tease him like now as you roll your eyes, and he reacts by throwing his other arm around your shoulders to keep you at his side the closer you get to your destination.

“But,” Jean whispers. “You’re my favorite girl.”

You can’t help the smile that tugs on your lips, and your heart from skipping a beat. “Good save,” you retort and slide your arm around his waist. “Smooth.”

Jean chuckles lightly. “Always am.”

You giggle and pull away to skip ahead when you approach the rock. The special rock under the gap on the ground that welcomes the sun inside, that was once a shining hope for Levi, Furlan, Isabel, and you.

“We’re here,” you announce proudly and turn to face your family.

Star studies the area and when she sees nothing but dirt and a rock, she scrunches her nose in disgust. “Ew,” she groans.

“Star,” Lucian scolds her. “That’s not nice.”

Your daughter ignores her brother and interjects. “What is this?”

You spin around and rush over to climb on the rock, finding it easier to climb it than when you were a little girl.

“This!” You exclaim happily. “Is a window into my past when Levi and I lived down here.”

You proceed to look around and see that a part of the ceiling has caved in so the gap is more like a decline that lets you come and go outside as you please, and that lets the sunlight shine brighter inside than ever before.

“Why here?” Lucian asks out of genuine curiosity.

“Well,” you sigh. “Back when I was young, people who lived underground couldn’t just go above ground. We needed special permits to live up there. And a lot of people here didn’t have the money, or the right connections to get those, so the only piece we had of the outside world was through gaps. Just like this one.”

Lucian glances up at the gap, making his light brown eyes gleam because of the sun's beam casting inside.

“You’d be here too, Pa?” Star asks Levi.

“Hm,” he agrees and picks up Star to get off his chair and walk towards the rock. “Your mom would love coming here. So we tried to come every weekend.”

Star stares hard at the gap, and Lucian finally breaks away from his spot to climb on with you.

“Do you think Uncle Eric and Uncle Ben came here?” Lucian asks.

You shrug as you take a seat. “I don’t know. We’ll have to ask….what do you think of this?”

Lucian studies his surroundings and he’s not as brazen as Star, you can see the wheels behind his turning as he tries to figure out something nice to say.

“It’s not the best place, not what you’re used to,” you whisper. “But you see that?” You point at the puddle of water across the rock. “At night when the moonlight hits here, all the puddles glimmer, and in the spring, because of the rain, clovers, moss, and wildflowers sprout on the dirt under the gap, and on the rock. In the winter, snow collects inside and people would come to enjoy it even if it was cold.”

Lucian looks at you and flashes you a sweet smile. You grin at him and ruffle his light brown hair.

“I don’t get it,” Star interjects.

“There’s nothing to get,” Levi rebuttals.

Star groans and drops out of Levi’s arms to run to the decline and look up at the sky for a moment before she smiles and runs above ground.

“Sorry,” Jean says as if it’s his fault she doesn’t get the appeal, but you’re glad she doesn’t.

“Well,” Lucian struggles to say. “It’s nice.”

You laugh softly and without having to be told you point your head outside. “You can go too.”

Lucian's eyes widen with guilt, so you offer him an assuring smile. “Go,” you insist. “It’s okay. We’ll be out in a minute.”

Lucian grins at you and quickly slides off the rock to chase after his sister and leave this cave.

“Well I think Marceline likes it,” Jean interjects and stands at the side of the rock.

You look down and just as you’re going to comment, a distant cry breaks in the air, and you know it comes from Star, so Jean and you share a knowing look.

“I’ll go,” he says. “Take the baby.”

You drag yourself to the edge and reach down to take the baby from Jean’s arms.

“Mommy! Daddy!” Star cries out, making Jean shout back.

“I’m goin’!”

You watch Jean jog out of the cave, and lose his figure when he’s above ground. You keep quiet and wait until you don’t hear Star stop crying when Jean tends to her to look down at your baby girl.

“You like it?” You ask her.

Marceline blinks and then begins to gnaw on her own fist.

“Cute,” Levi deadpans.

You snort and look back at him, and catch him carefully climbing up to join your side and look up at the blue sky thousands of miles above you.

“They don’t get it,” he says softly.

You turn Marceline around and let out a soft sigh. “No,” you say. “But I’m glad they don’t…it means we did good…right?”

Levi slides his hands in his pockets and nods in agreement. “Yeah. You did.”

“We did,” you correct him. “You won this war too. We did good. They don’t have to find beauty in this cave to try and stay hopeful. We fought for that.”

Levi hums and peers are you. “Why did you ask if you already know the answer?” He asks with a small smile.

You shrug. “I just wanted your opinion, but I should’ve known better.” You laugh softly and watch the sun ray that shines over the rock, and catch a beautiful orange and black monarch butterfly flutter inside.

“Would you look at that?” You muse to Marceline.

The baby is obvious to the insect until it surprisingly lands on her arm and startles her.

“It’s okay,” you coo. “It won’t hurt you.”

Marceline begins to breathe heavily as her eyes stay trained on the butterfly, but then she abruptly reaches for it.

Luckily though you catch her arm before she can snatch the delicate creature. “Careful,” you warn her sweetly and with a laugh. “Gentle. You have to be kind,” you whisper. “Remember that?”

Marceline shrieks and scares the butterfly away. She doesn’t let that discourage her though and squeals as she leans over to try and capture the butterfly already too far from her grasp.

“It’s gone,” you tell her. “Why don’t you say goodbye, Hm? Goodbye, butterfly.”

Marceline stays quiet for a moment as her eyes follow the butterfly out of the cave. And only once it’s out does she begin to open and close her hand as she mumbles. “Buh-byyy.”

You giggle and nod. “Yes! Good!” You encourage her and look up at Levi with pride before you look back at your daughter as she keeps her hand out as she notices the sunlight dancing on her chubby fingers.

“That’s the sun,” you let her know and put your own palm out.

Marceline glances at the sun on your palm and slaps her hand against yours as if trying to capture it.

“No, silly,” you interject. “It’s the sunlight. You can’t get it. Trust me I’ve tried.”

Marceline studies her hand and slowly turns it before putting her palm over yours so the sun would kiss her hand again.

“Sunlight,” try to make her say it. “Sunlight.”

Marceline giggles and doesn’t dare move her hand so the sun can keep clinging onto her, making you look at her with pride, whilst Levi looks down at the both of you in awe.

This is all he wanted. For you to have a good life, to be happy.

You have that now and much more. He sees that every day and all he can feel is pride and awe for you. He feels grateful that you had a chance to have the world. And yes, it started a bit painful, you knew suffering for some time, but you have all he wanted you to have, love, a future, a legacy, pure joy, and hope and he’s grateful for that every day he sees you.

However, what brings the most pride is that he kept his promise to Kenny, and himself, he took care of you. And that’s why you are and will always be his favorite achievement. You are his pride, his joy, and his hope. Forever.

A/N- Thank you, thank you and thank you a hundred more times to everyone who came along in journey with me and supported this fanfic series!! I really hope you all liked the ending, and I will always be grateful to all of you!! I hope to keep seeing you all around!!

Tagged- @expectoscamander @greenygreenland @that-soft-lesbian-friend @dai-tsukki-desu @usernamehere91 @avocadopoosae @romancried @victor-criss-bish @moo-moo-meadow @stareatceiling @padfootii @ravensleepyeyes @thanosisadilf @dawneee @babyyblueey @leahseclipse @ifimnotabushimnoone @luvelyxp @ameliabs-world @dragon-master-kai

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shu-box-puns · 4 months

Text

You wanna be one of them (Tsu'tey x Reader) Part 9

Previous Chapter <- Act 9

If you prefer to read on Ao3, you can find the fic here!

Word Count: 9156

Summary: To transfer, or not to transfer, that is the question.

Reader uses they/them pronouns.

The morning the Sky People returned to the stars, you linked up to your avatar as you had been doing for the past several months. As always, you felt something in the back of your mind click into place as the buzz of the link unit cradling your human body melted away, in its place, the sounds of the forest swept in, alongside the comforting rumble of a steady purr. Your senses filtered in one by one after that, as they always did.

Only this time, you woke to the scent of your new home, the comforting weight of your mate’s arms wrapped around you, and the soft light of dawn trickling through the canopy above your newly built hut. It would take several more weeks before New Village was finished, with your own accommodation needing a few further tweaks, but it was home.

Smugly, you felt yourself grinning as you curled up tighter in Tsu’tey’s arms, revelling in the weight of them wrapped around you and the warmth of him pressed up against you. The hammock rocked under your shifting weight, sturdy and comfortable as it swayed. During the night, your legs had tangled together, whereas Tsu’tey had tucked his face into your neck, his steady breaths curling across the sensitive skin of your collarbones. Here, within the home you’d built together in New Village, he was the picture of relaxed.

All too soon, his loose limbed sprawl wound tight as he realised you had linked up.

Tsu’tey’s ear flicked lazily as he shifted in place, a cat readjusting before going back to sleep. <”Good morning.”> He greeted sluggishly, nuzzling his cold nose against vulnerable skin.

Smiling to yourself, you squeezed him in return, relishing in how he melted under your touch. All pliant and relaxed, greedy for some soft words and adoring touches. <”Did I wake you?”> Tsu’tey hummed drowsily, but took his sweet time in responding. <”No,”> he murmured finally, making no move to get up. Typical.

As his breathing evened out again, you listened to the familiar buzz of the clan preparing for the day. Two dozen hunters would oversee the launch at noon, whereas the rest of the clan would continue to forage and build New Village in their absence. With all the humans successfully rounded up and accounted for, the time had come to finally get them off Pandora.

<”We need to get up.”> You finally told the ceiling, when Tsu’tey made it abundantly clear he had no plans of doing so.

Predictably, your mate shook his head against your skin before nestling down further into you, pulling your long limbed body impossibly closer. You had the sneaking suspicion that he would crawl in your body if it were possible.

Who knew the fearsome Tsu’tey was a cuddler?

You certainly hadn’t; not before. Not when you’d been friends, despite the evidence lying in how he’d always felt a need to playfully shove at you or knock your shoulders together. What once could’ve been passed off as platonic camaraderie between hunters, had now been revealed as what it was.

A newly formed bond, strong in its magnetism and unescapable. Not that you wanted to escape. If anything, the last few days had proven just how much Tsu’tey had been holding back during the courtship. Now that you were mated, it seemed you couldn’t keep your hands off of one another. Sometimes, you felt like it was a miracle you’d managed to get anything done.

Every touch felt too fleeting, regardless of whether it had been for hours or minutes. You constantly wanted to be near him, wanting to appease the instinctual part of you that looked at Tsu’tey and felt complete; felt safe. It was a fascinating phenomenon, you’d concluded.

Even more so when you realised that although Tsu’tey had formed the bond with your human body, the pull between you was no less magnetising in your avatar. It didn’t matter which body you occupied, Tsu’tey seemed to sense where you were before you could even announce yourself.

Chuckling to yourself, you gave his back a sympathetic pat in condolence. <”I know, I know, I love a lie in as much as the next person, but the sooner we get up, the sooner we can get it done.”>

<”That is not how time works.”> Tsu’tey immediately argued.

<”And yet, we still have to get up.”>

Stubbornly, Tsu’tey didn’t move, so you were forced to resort to peeling his hands off of you and wiggling out from under him. Tsu’tey put up a half-assed fight, but ultimately allowed you to sit up. Legs swung over the side of the hammock, you glanced back to find him glaring at your back whilst curling into the warm spot you’d left behind. His tail thumped unhappily as he simply watched you, looking annoyingly adorable.

Seeing your distraction, Tsu’tey abruptly decided he was done with sleeping and quick as a whip, reached out and wrestled you back down into the hammock. You yelped, hands pushing feebly at him as he pressed you down into the comfortable material and stretched out across your front.

<”Forgetting something?”> Tsu’tey asked calmly, the hunger in his gaze betraying his collected tone. You felt his tail thumping down next to your thigh now, intrigued as you smiled and pulled his face down.

A purr rumbled to life in his chest as you kissed his cheek, like you had every morning after he’d rescued you. Adorably, his ears were wiggling now as his eyes fluttered closed, basking in your attention. Finding yourself grinning too hard to keep kissing him, you settled for pressing your foreheads together as you had hundreds of times before. Lovingly, your hand slid from cupping his cheek to carding through his braids.

Tsu’tey’s eyelids slipped open at the change of sensation. <”More.”>

<”Greedy.”> You purred back.

<”If you’re going to kiss me,”> Tsu’tey continued slowly, a glint of glee creeping into his eye as he lowered himself from his hands to his elbows. It sent a thrill through you, in how confident he was in getting when asking for something. He was hovering close enough not that your flat noses almost touched. <”Then I demand that you do it properly.”>

You couldn’t help but momentarily flick your gaze down to his lips as he spoke, noting - not for the first time - their pretty pigmentation. How a hint of lilac had crept onto his lower lip, blending perfectly with the blue of his complexion. Those lips stretched into a cocky grin under your attention.

It took great effort, but you managed to glare up at him as you replied in mock offence, <”those were proper kisses.”>

Tsu’tey tilted his head curiously, looking as unconvinced as one physically could. <”Properly.”> He repeated, as the corner of his mouth kicked up in amusement.

With a playful eye roll, you sighed. <”Fine.”>

Dramatically, you puckered your lips and batted your eyelashes, assuming Tsu’tey would scoff at your idiocy and push you away with a laugh. You thought he’d groan at you for ruining the mood and finally climb out of bed to get on with his day. It seemed however, that you had gravely miscalculated.

Instead of replying with banter or a tut, Tsu’tey’s cockiness abruptly melted into hunger. Your stomach squirmed as his eyes dragged down your face to your mouth, his tongue unconsciously flicking out to wet his lower lip. Your only warning was the way his ears lowered, before he promptly dove in for the kill.

Despite his enthusiasm, the first touch of your lips was gentle, almost chaste. A simple press of warm skin to skin before pulling back. His pupils were blown unbelievably wide as he tilted his head and moved in for another.

His body pressed you down into the hammock, applying delicious pressure to your stomach and thighs. You felt your own purr rising in the back of your throat as the security the position offered, with your mate covering all of you with himself, and taking whatever you gave him. Your chests were pressed so tightly together that you could feel the rhythmic pounding of his heart beating in time with your own escalated pulse.

The way his hands cupped your cheeks, his thumb rubbing back and forth across the apple of your cheek as if you were something precious - something to be admired - made your knees weak.

Kissing Tsu’tey was nothing like touching foreheads in either form. Neither was it anything like kissing him when you were human. In this body, where the size difference was significantly less and your strengths were similar, the kisses were less careful, and more effortless in how they pushed and pulled you into each other’s orbit. It was simple, and perfect, and felt like you’d been doing it your entire lives.

That was what you loved about Tsu’tey. How easy it was to be with him, and how effortlessly the pair of you fit together. How, despite your differences and your playful banter, you could still have these precious and soft moments just between you.

All too soon, your mate pulled back with a satisfied grin. <”Much better.”> He praised you, landing one last parting peck to the tip of your nose before rolling off of you. You were left panting, staring up with blown pupils at the ceiling whilst Tsu’tey puttered around the hut.

Getting your breath back, you finally managed to roll yourself out of the hammock. Stooping for your knife belt, you heard Tsu’tey chuckle to himself from across the hut. Flipping him off over your shoulder, you secured your belt across your torso before reaching for your jewellery. The pair of you prepared for the day ahead in companionable silence.

By the time you’d strapped your armband across your bicep and shouldered your bow, Tsu’tey had adorned his Olo’eyktan attire and dug out a couple of bowls of war paint. Having already crushed the pigment and mixed in the adequate measurement of water, Tsu’tey had sat himself down and gestured to you to come over. The feathers braided into his hair danced on a soft breeze as you sank to your knees opposite him.

As he wordlessly mixed up the yellow pigment for the base layer, you found yourself beginning to fidget. <”What pattern are you doing this time?”> <”The same as before. My family crest.”> Tsu’tey explained simply, his eyes remaining fixed on the task at hand.

<”Your family…”> You trailed off as realisation dawned on you.

Tsu’tey made a point of dipping his fingers into the thick, yellow paint, his hand steady as he withdrew from the bowl and raised it to begin painting the cold mixture in a familiar pattern across your features. Diligently, you kept still as he worked, watching his brow furrow in concentration. Outwardly, he seemed to be the picture of calm and collected, but behind his back, you noted how he was making an effort to keep his tail still. The sudden twitches and aborted movements of the appendage betrayed his anxiety.

You knew without asking that both of you were recalling that morning before the Battle for The Tree of Souls, when Tsu’tey had distracted you from Grace’s passing by applying your war paint, an act traditionally performed by mates or family members. At the time, you had dismissed it as a kind gesture, considering you had no family of your own to ask. But in hindsight, Tsu’tey’s true intentions had been painfully obvious. As had the gifting of the Atokirina knife and armband after your successful iknimaya.

<”You’re a sneaky bastard.”>

Tsu’tey’s lips thinned, but his movements remained steady. <”No, you’re just dense.”> He sighed tiredly with no venom. <”You knew exactly what applying war paint means, and yet did not stop me. I assumed my intentions were welcome since you reciprocated.”> <”I mean, yes it worked out, but I didn’t think that was how you meant it.”> You admitted honestly, to which Tsu’tey rolled his eyes but let you speak. You pressed on, <”I assumed it was because Jake was occupied with Neytiri. Just like I didn’t realise the gifts were courting gifts, because I assumed you were just being friendly and didn’t want me to miss out on the usual traditions.”>

<”Dense.”> Tsu’tey repeated smugly. <”When have I even been that friendly to an outsider?”>

You tilted your head in acknowledgement to the valid point. <”Not dense.”> You decided to focus on, ignoring his sarcastic snort. <”It wasn’t my fault that your People’s courting rituals don’t come with a handbook.”>

Tsu’tey shook his head, dismissing the argument. <”I made my intentions painfully clear.”>

<”By painfully clear, you mean painfully confusing.”>

Abruptly, Tsu’tey pulled his hand away from your face and fixed you with a stern look. <”And what, please tell me, is confusing about gifting you useful items? Does that not indicate courtship on your planet?”> <”I mean yes, but-”> <”Then my point remains the same, you are incredibly dense.”> With a flourish, he put down the yellow paint and reached for the navy whilst you stewed.

He was applying the new shade to your brow when you came up with a decent response. <”And what if I turned up to HomeTree with a fistful of flowers and presented them to you?”>

Tsu’tey’s painting hand faltered mid stroke as his nose scrunched up in confusion. <”Why in Eywa’s name, would you want to do that?”> Your heart twinged. <”Just humour me, what would you think?”> <”Would you intend to add them to a soup? Craft clothing or extract the oils?”> <”No. I would pick them because they’re pretty.”> And they’d look pretty on you. You didn’t add. Tsu’tey scoffed, his voice firm as he voiced his opinion. <”Then I would consider it impractical, and a waste of resources.”> Against your best efforts, your expression tightened at the predictable response. Thank Eywa for Mo’at confiscating your hard found ‘weeds’.

Tsu’tey’s steady hand had gone still against your cheek. <”What?”> He asked, pulling his finger back.

<”What?”> He wrinkled his nose. <”You’re looking at me like I stepped on your tail and refused to apologise.”> You kept your mouth resolutely shut, hoping he’d just go back to painting, but as usual, Tsu’tey didn’t let you off lightly. <”Yawne, tell me.”> He said sweetly, his painting hand lowering in clear indication that he wouldn’t continue until you explained.

With a loud swallow, you pushed the words out, feeling foolish. <”Humans give people they like pretty flowers to show they like each other. It’s usually how we show something that we’d like to keep dating.”>

Understanding swept across Tsu’tey’s face. <”I see. It is one of your traditions then?”>

<”Yeah.”> <”How interesting.”> Tsu’tey commented neutrally, <”unheard of by my people, but similar to our gifting of useful items.”> You hummed in agreement, which Tsu’tey took as the go ahead to drop the topic and continue with the task at hand.

>_<

The hunting party was uncharacteristically silent as it crossed the rainforests towards Hell’s Gate. Where usually there was light banter or joking, today, no one spoke. Hardly anyone made eye contact. There would be time to relax later, for now it was crucial to come off as the hostile enemy the RDA painted them as. One final push before the finish line.

The rest of the day followed the same sombre mood. You sat astride your pa’li with your bow notched and resting against your thigh as you supervised the sad march of the humans towards their spaceship. Your war paint felt tight against your clammy skin, but you knew it made you look unsettlingly fearsome from the weary glances your former colleagues kept shooting you. You recognised a couple of faces amongst the crowd, all of which were twisted in defeat and bitter betrayal. Their eyes slid off of you like oil over water. It seemed that you fit in so well amongst the clan, that no one could pinpoint your face.

At your side, Jake shifted uncomfortably astride his own mount, his eyes pinned on Neytiri who stood at Tsu’tey’s elbow on the other side of the literal human stream. The pair were decked out in their feathers and formal attire, offering a united, intimidating front in the face of the defeated humans.

The tension was so thick that it felt like a cloak around your shoulders. The anxiety it generated naturally filtered down the bond into your mount, who shifted uneasily on her hooves. You soothed her as well as you could. Gently, running your hand up and down her neck as you pushed calming thoughts down the bond.

She did not like this weird environment where the earth was smooth and treacherous and the dirt was concealed by a thick layer of rock. She did not like the towering structures pretending to be cliffs, nor did she like the rumble of the metal toruk’s growl, which sent her instincts into overdrive. She was concerned by the weird little creatures willingly clambering into the great predator’s mouth, and anxious that she might be asked to follow.

As she shifted, you kept rubbing her neck and coaxing her to look at the trees instead of the waiting spaceship.

Beside you, Jake drew in a deep breath, barely warning you that he was about to speak.

“What is it?” You asked quietly, conscious of the people within earshot.

”Well,” Jake began, “Tsu’tey asked me the weirdest questions this morning, about weeds and random flora that I don’t even know the translations for. You didn’t, by chance, have anything to do with that, did you?” The marine whispered, sounding more amused than concerned.

Rolling your eyes at his blatant jabs ”I was proving that our traditions are different and he shouldn’t have expected me to figure out the courtship through mixed signals and unfamiliar gestures.” ”Ah.” He did not elaborate.

“What does that mean?” Jake pointedly ducked his head. You furrowed your brow. “Jake, what the hell did you tell him? ”Jake suddenly became very interested in the humans marching across the tarmac. You prodded him in the side with the end of your bow, to which Jake took a swift swipe at the weapon which laughably missed. ”What the hell did you tell him?”

“Nothing bad!” Jake exclaimed too loudly, drawing a few heads. He raised his spear in silent threat before continuing, his face melting into the cold, hard lines of Toruk Makto. Startled, the humans returned their attention to the spaceship instead of his outburst. ”I told him about roses and carnations and shit. Alright?”

“Wow, didn’t take you for a florist. Was that a side gig back on earth?” “Of course not. I just had a girlfriend who was really into flower meanings.” He fiddled with the twine holding his spear head to the shaft. “Uhuh, of course you did.” Without turning his attention from the humans, Jake shifted his weapon and jabbed you in the side with the butt of his spear. You hissed before twisting in the saddle and kicking him in the hip. He narrowly avoided being unseated by the blow. Jake growled in response, but whatever retaliation he planned on carrying out abruptly flew out the window when the pair of you noticed that someone had stopped walking in front of your pa’li.

Just from the way he held himself, you knew the man was important, and he knew it too. Luckily, it didn’t take too long for his name to return to you.

“Oi Selfridge, spaceship is that way.” Jake prompted, motioning to said ship.

The former CEO didn’t move. With a thoughtful expression, he pointedly looked the marine up and down with cocky disinterest, his exo mask puffing loudly in time with his slow, measured breaths. Somehow, he commanded all of your attention despite his vulnerable position, he barely came up to your pa’li’s knee after all.

“You know this isn’t over.” Selfridge stated, no, promised.

Jake sat up a little straighter as his expression turned venomous. “No. It very much is over.” The marine said confidently, to which Selfridge shook his head.

Your spine prickled, as your tail shot upright. With great theatrics, you drew your bow on the man, ensuring that his attention slid to you as you pulled the bowstring taught and aimed your arrow at him. “Move along.” You growled simply, motioning to the ship with your arrowhead.

Selfridge took his time looking you up and down, unnerving you with how calmly he reacted to having an arrow longer than his leg aimed at his head. “Doctor.” He drawled by way of greeting, to which you made a point of pulling your bowstring back to your cheek.

The CEO nodded once, his expression unreadable, before turning on his heel and marching peacefully into the spaceship alongside everyone else to find himself a seat. You kept your arrow trained on him the whole time, if only because it made the rest of them shuffle a little faster towards the ship.

Smartly, no one else attempted to strike up conversation.

Before the sun reached its peak, the door to the spaceship began to close with a thunderous grind of gears. Within minutes, the clan were retreating back across the tarmac towards the trees as the engines began to fire up. Your pa’li had just stepped into the shade of the furthest tree when the enormous machine generated enough thrust to finally lift off.

And just like that, it was over.

Something sentimental stirred in your chest, as you urged your pa’li to pause. Restlessly, she did, allowing you to turn in the saddle and watch the enormous machine streak up into the clouds and beyond. It sped like a shooting star back into the atmosphere and then further and further until it was almost indistinguishable from the other daytime stars.

>_<

A vast bonfire was lit as eclipse rolled in, and the light of the human spaceship had shrunk to a pinprick in the night sky.

As the smell of roasted yerik and popping nuts filled the belly of New Village, you relaxed against a fallen log. Face freshly cleaned of war paint, you looked out amongst the People who had welcomed you into their midst and felt warmth bloom in your chest. The clearing was alive with chatter and music as na’vi leapt around the popping flames, twirling with one another as laughter filled the air. It was the most relaxed you’d seen everyone in weeks.

Your eyes were heavy from the alcohol, a pleasant buzz settling into the back of your mind as you simply watched. At long last, you felt content. The RDA were returning home. The clan was finally safe. And to top it all off, you’d somehow snagged the Olo’eyktan of said clan and gotten yourself a ridiculously protective alien cat in the process.

The very same powerful chieftain, who was currently curled up in your lap, decked out in his Olo’eyktan attire with his tipsiness showing in the bright flush of his cheeks. You didn’t need Tsaheylu to know that he was content. Every hard contour of his body screamed relaxed. His muscles were loose and pliant under your wandering fingers as you carded the long digits through his freshly braided hair. His tail lazily thumped against the grass, whilst one of his arms was slung over your lap and loosely holding your thigh. A possessive but comfortable hold.

Over by the fire, you watched a couple of avatar drivers attempt to imitate the complex dance moves of some hunters, who laughed good naturedly at them before drunkenly walking them through steps.

You could see Jake forcing Norm to dance with him, whilst Neytiri cheered as she swayed on her feet. To his credit, Norm tried his very best to keep up, but Jake was a surprisingly competent dancer. The scientist gave up after an embarrassing couple of failed attempts, his hands raised in mock surrender whilst Jake ribbed him.

The marine didn’t let his lack of partner sour his drunken haze however, and quickly swept Neytiri up in his rhythm. She beamed, her eyes alight as her body moved with liquid grace to the sound of the drums.

<”Are you cold, Yawne?”> Tsu’tey murmured softly into your thigh, the arm slung over your legs moving to rub at your calf. Your gaze flickered downwards as a fond smile slipped onto your lips.

<”You don’t need an excuse to cuddle me.”> You chuckled, giving his scalp an affectionate scratch, <”get up here.”> Your mate rolled the command over in his head once or twice, before deciding that the suggestion was a sound one. With great concentration which could only be mustered after one had drunk a little too much, Tsu’tey fumbled into a sitting position before promptly collapsing down on the log you were currently leaning against, and clumsily dragging you across his chest. You laughed, wiggling to readjust his neck piece into a more comfortable pillow before settling down.

Against your ear, Tsu’tey’s chest roared to life with a healthy purr, to which you allowed your own content sound to slip free. His grip tightened on your shoulder, whilst his tail wound its way around your ankle. The picture of content. Who would’ve known that Tsu’tey was an affectionate drunk?

”Look at ya, you lovebirds.” Jake suddenly slurred, his head popping into your peripheral vision before promptly disappearing as he threw himself down into the grass with a heavy thump.

“Love-bird?” Tsu’tey muttered to himself, his eyes closed and his head tipped back to lean against the cool bark of the log.

“Jake.” Neytiri lightly scolded, padding away from the fire, her eyes bright with amusement. “I believe you have had too much.” Jake looked thoughtful for a moment, his hand rising to scratch at an absent beard as he looked the picture of quiet contemplation. All before he shook his head with an exaggerated. “Naaaaaaaaaaa.”

Neytiri chuckled lightly.

“Having waaaaaayyyy tooo much fun.” The marine continued, oblivious to the volume of his voice, whilst Tsu’tey grumbled. “I wish every day.” He paused, “could be like this one.”

“I mean,” you interjected, refusing to lift your head from your comfortable pillow. “What’s stopping us? Am I right?” “Right you are!” Jake agreed readily, before a sudden idea struck him. His ears flattened as he spun to Neytiri who barely batted an eyelid at his dramatics. “Neyyyytiri?”

She sighed. “Yes?” “You know you love me?” “I do.” “Like, you love me the way Tsu’tey loves human Y/n?” “Yes?” Neytiri answered, her voice wavering. “Where is this going, Jake?” “Well, would you still love me if I were a na’vi? Like fully na’vi. Not half or even a quarter, as in full, total na’vi.” He was talking animatedly with his hands now, which he was waving around to emphasise his words, only to catch sight of them mid rant. The marine frowned as he wiggled his five fingers. “Or, well, as close to na’vi as I can get.”

To her credit, Neytiri managed to keep her voice level when she responded, but you could tell from the sudden thrash of her tail that Jake had unknowingly struck a nerve. “What are you saying Jake?” “Well!” The marine continued, oblivious to the distress on his mate’s face. “The doctor.” He pointed dramatically to you, “and I were discussing consciousness transfers.” It was as if someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over your head, smacked your round the face with a marble rolling pin, and then gleefully kicked the back of your knee so you fell down a flight of stairs. Beneath you, Tsu’tey’s body went from a comfortable pillow to a rigid bed of granite.

Neytiri just looked confused. “You want to go through with the-” “Yes!” Jake replied rapidly, his tail wiggling with eagerness. “I do! I really want to! It’s all I’ve thought about for WEEKS!”

“Really?” Neytiri pressed, Jake nodded excitedly, to which Neytiri sighed. Her lips were pressed tightly together as she looked him up and down, her ears lowering as she realised just how sure he was about this. With an anxious flick of her tail, the huntress managed to smooth out her expression and offer a neutral, “we will talk about this once you’re sober.”

Jake just wiggled, all wide smiles and flapping ears. Neytiri shook her head at him, but didn’t press the matter further. Cautiously, she approached, still studying him for telltale signs of doubt, but found nothing.

Jake on the other hand, had decided the conversation was not yet over. With a sudden and unnerving turn of his head, his too focused gaze settled on you, causing you to tense. Those disproportionately small eyes seemed to peer into your very soul as he asked plainly, “did you decide that you wanted to do it with me in the end?”

Tsu’tey loose grip around your torso turned bruising. His purr, which had lowered to a languid rumble since Jake had sat down, abruptly cut out.

“You have discussed this?” Tsu’tey asked, his voice barely within the range of calm. It almost sounded accusatory, but that could just be the alcohol running through your bloodstream.

“A little.” You replied honestly, finding yourself unable to meet his eyes. You almost felt guilty for admitting it, as if you’d betrayed him somehow. “I mean, as avatar drivers we all inevitably fantasise about staying like this. Whether it’s possible or not-” “But Mo’at thinks it is possible.” Jake interrupted, oblivious to the mosaic of emotions currently playing out across Tsu’tey’s face. “We have a chance.” He implored, practically sparkling with enthusiasm. “A real, proper chance.” “As did Grace Augustine.” Tsu’tey cut in, his eyes suddenly sharp and sober. If he didn’t have his arm still tightly around your torso, acting as reassurance and comfort, you might have shrunk away from the ice in his tone. “Was her chance not as good as your own?” “Grace was dying.” Neytiri pointed out carefully, “Eywa had already taken her hand.”

“And what if She takes his hand?” Tsu’tey pointed out, gesturing to Jake. “What if She takes them out of their bodies but does not give them back? What then?” Neytiri’s carefully guarded expression threatened to crumble, to which Tsu’tey’s rage flickered. Guilt played out across his face as he gazed upon his friend and saw his own anxiety reflecting back at him.

“If it makes you feel any better, She wouldn’t want me.” You mumbled inaudibly, tipping your head back to catch his eye. You focused on making your microexpressions relaxed, trying to offer subconscious comfort.

“She might.” “She won’t.” You reassured him, “I’m too slippery anyway.” Which was a lie. Of course, there was the very real chance that Eywa might not breathe you back, and that terrified you. It made you queasy just thinking about it.

”That’s alright.” Jake reassured you, before a sly, shit-eating grin appeared on his face. ”I doubt Tsu’tey could deal with waking up to your grumpy ass every morning anyway.”

The mixed emotions in Tsu’tey’s face immediately cleared up into an offended snort. ”I could!”

”You could not!” Jake countered explosively. ”Sure, they’re all cute trying to steal back their blankets, but I have feared for my life. The swearing is ridiculous and the side-eyes could kill a man.” Tsu’tey suddenly grinned as if he were about to let Jake in on a state secret. ”Perhaps your methods guarantee failure.” He purred seductively in your ear, before unexpectedly attacking your neck and ear with kisses. Absently, you heard Jake fake a retch between the sounds of your own shrieking. He was ignored, as you focused all your efforts into wriggling free of Tsu’tey’s secure grasp, as the assault of loud kisses were pelted across your face and neck.

By the time he let up with one last, heavy kiss to your cheek, Neytiri had coaxed Jake into drinking some water, and the previous topic of conversation had been laid to rest.

If Tsu’tey held you a little tighter throughout the rest of the night, neither of you brought it up.

>_<

All in all, it was a wild party that lasted well into the early hours of the next day.

Bidding Neytiri and a sloshed Jake a warm goodbye, you and Tsu’tey padded across the village to your shared hut. Within moments of ducking in through the curtain, you went straight for the hammock. Flopping down in it on your front, you felt exhaustion threaten to drag you down there and then. Over the hours, your drunkenness had lightened to a pleasant warmth in your chest and a slight slowing of your reflexes.

Something which Tsu’tey took advantage of now as he carefully unstrapped your knife from your chest, as well as removing your armband and other accessories. His focused movements were practised and gently as he placed everything down carefully beside the hammock on the floor where you could find it easily in the morning.

<”You coming in?”> You asked sleepily, after he brushed your braids from your face and straightened.

<“I must check on the clan first.”> Tsu’tey whispered back, ever the doting Olo’eyktan. <”Several of the younger hunters were not looking too capable of getting home unassisted.”>

<”Okay.”> You yawned, before snuggling down with a content purr. <”I’ll be heading out then.”> Tsu’tey smiled tightly. <”Of course.”> <“Sleep well.”>

He nodded, but you were too tipsy to find anything unusual in the action.

As Tsu’tey’s footsteps padded away across the hammock, you allowed your eyelids to droop as you began to drift away.

The comfortable buzz of alcohol left you as you slipped back into your human body, like a warm hand disappearing from your cheek. You opened your eyes to the low glow of the link unit, to the tiny little lights that decorated the inner metal frame; a pathetic replacement for the stars.

For a moment, you just laid there, wishing you were still in your home. Recalling the warmth of Tsu’tey’s body as you’d been pressed against it all night. In some ways, you half expected to turn your head and find him there waiting for you, but in reality, you knew he wouldn’t be. Whilst the link unit was a sensible distance from the village, it was still out of the way enough for privacy. Which meant your comfy hammock and mate would be inaccessible until you relinked.

With a heavy sigh, you lifted a numb arm and pushed open the lid.

The room beyond your unit was dim, with only the green emergency lights breaking up the darkness. The whir of Jake’s machine chugged along by the wall, and no doubt would continue to do so for several more hours. You envied him, despite having made the decision to leave yourself.

Absently, you recalled the conversation from earlier. The confident way in which Jake had communicated his desires, how he hadn’t hesitated in stating what he wanted. Although he had been drunk at the time, you knew how much he wanted to transfer.

In some ways, you envied how single minded he was on the matter. How sure he was that it would be the best thing for him.

Overhead, raindrops tapped lightly against the hollow metal of the compound roof. When did it begin to rain?

With a coldness settling in within your ribs, you heaved your sore body into a sitting position. The walls of the compound were grey, as Hell’s Gate had always been. The floor was ice cold beneath your feet, a stark contrast to the sun warmed soil you’d been lounging on for the past few hours.

With a firm shake of your head, you shoved that thought process down. Dwelling too long on it would only make the consciousness transfer more appealing. And sometimes it was; when you were alone. But after the look on Tsu’tey’s face when Jake had brought it up, the way he’d held you that little bit tighter, the way your now sober brain could read the fear in his actions, you knew you couldn’t go through with it. Not now that you had everything you needed.

With forced energy, you padded out of the link room towards the bathroom where you flicked on the light but pointedly avoided looking at yourself in the mirror. In this weird mindset, you weren’t quite sure how you’d feel if you caught sight of yourself.

The warmth of the shower helped in the way only blistering hot water could. And comfortable pyjamas just made everything that little bit more bearable.

The kitchen was as you’d left it that morning. Sterile and boring. Dragging down a sealed ration from one of the overhead cupboards, you pierced the plastic film before shoving the dehydrated meal into the microwave and setting it to three minutes. In the stillness of the compound, illuminated by the orange light of the little machine, you watched your lacklustre meal spin on the carousel.

If you hadn’t been staring so hard at the microwave, you would’ve missed the flicker of movement that darted across the window in your peripheral vision. Instinctively, your head snapped up. After spending all day in your avatar, you could feel the phantom sensation of your ears pricking as your slouched body went ramrod straight. The reflection of the warm light of the microwave made it hard for you to see out into the darkness, but when the little machine dinged and went dark, the kitchen was abruptly plunged into darkness.

As the pastel glow of Pandora’s plants filled the little room, you felt your heartbeat begin to pick up. You dared not move a muscle, despite itching for a weapon. Preferably your knife, but that was stashed beside your link unit as an additional security measure.

With luck, the movement was something none threatening that had just happened to come across the compound and immediately lost interest. Or maybe, it was that palulukan that had taken an interest in Tsu’tey. If you were really unlucky however, it would be something armed and intelligent enough to get into the compound.

Somewhere outside, you heard something large shifting through the undergrowth, as a couple of plants wiggled when something brushed against them. You sucked in a sharp breath.

The sound of someone politely knocking was almost more terrifying than the unknown.

Spinning around, you found a distinctly na’vi figure lurking behind the glass of another window. You weren’t entirely sure whether to be relieved or more terrified. The figure stooped, as if peering through the glass before knocking again, this time more firmly. With the plants backlighting them, you couldn’t make out any features.

Deciding that this was not at all how you wanted to spend your evening, you decided to bite the bullet and turn on the light switch. Hopefully, the na’vi was just drunk and confused, and the sight of you would send them on their way.

You flipped the switch, bathing the kitchen in warm light. Your own reflection looked back at you from the window, looking tired and small. To your surprise, the na’vi began tapping more furiously, almost desperately against the glass at the sight of you. Your brows furrowed, that definitely was not the reaction you’d been expecting, must be someone from the clan.

Hesitantly, you approached the window. The knocking slowed down a little, as the na’vi realised that they had successfully captured your attention. Making your movements obvious, you brought your hand up to the glass to block out some of the light, which created a small pocket with which you could see outside with.

The first feature you noticed was the familiar notch taken out of the na’vi’s right ear. By then, it was pretty easy to figure out who had drunkenly decided to visit you.

Your shoulders lost their tension as you sighed good naturedly and pulled away from the window. With exaggerated movements, you turned in the direction of the airlock, to which the knocking ceased once more and you heard something large pushing through the undergrowth as they strode for the entrance to the compound.

With practised ease, you strapped on an exo mask and slipped into the airlock, which immediately clicked shut and sucked all the earth air out before the second door unlocked with a crisp click. Pushing it open, you were immediately met with a firm sheet of rain. And there, standing at the base of the steps, his braids dripping, was Tsu’tey.

<”What are you doing here?”> You blurted, taking in his sodden appearance. Judging by his slightly elevated breathing, he’d run here instead of tracking down a pa’li or calling his ikran.

With the sway of a tipsy man pretending to be sober, Tsu’tey stepped closer. <”Missed you.”>

Your knee jerk reaction to the admission was to point out that you’d last seen each other barely half an hour ago, but his expression stilled your tongue. You could see your own uncertainty reflecting back at you, could see the unsettled shifting of his feet as his eyes flickered from your face to somewhere over your shoulder.

<”Yeah, I missed you too.”> You said instead, finding a private smile slipping onto your face as his shoulders loosened in relief.

The tension between you now felt more charged than usual, like a second shoe preparing to drop. This wasn’t the usual buzz of friendly camaraderie or mutual pining, there was something more lurking in the shadows here. A thought evidenced by the hunter’s lowered ears as he averted his gaze once again.

<”What is it?”> Your voice was barely audible over the sound of raindrops landing on leaves, but you knew from the way his expression snapped back to something more neutral, that he had heard.

It was then that you noticed he had one hand suspiciously hidden behind his back.

The scene turned comical then. With Tsu’tey dripping wet from the rain and hiding something from you, whilst you stood at about chest height thanks to the ramp outside the compound, with your hands resting on your hips. To an outsider, the scene would resemble a sceptical parent wondering what their toddler had that they definitely shouldn’t. The fact that Tsu’tey was swaying slightly from the alcohol just added to the entire thing.

<”What do you have there?”> You asked carefully, to which Tsu’tey’s eyes narrowed.

<”Nothing.”> <”Tsu’tey, I can see you’re hiding something.”> <”No you can’t!”> He blurted before adding, <”am not!”>

You arched a brow, to which Tsu’tey’s tail rose in silent challenge.

<”How?!”> He demanded.

<”Lucky guess?”>

The hunter sighed heavily. <”It was a secret.”>

<”Ah, I see.”>

With a pout, Tsu’tey dramatically pulled a bouquet of flowers out from behind his back and thrust them at you. They were tiny in his enormous hand, barely glowing with several of their petals missing and their roots still intact with soil falling from them at random intervals. <”You are truly a difficult person to smoothly give gifts to.”> Your mate helpfully informed you as your eyes blew wide at the adorable gesture.

You were torn between wrestling him down into a hug and bursting into tears at the thoughtful gesture. With a tight throat, you instead managed to squeeze out an emotional, <”thank you,”> as you reached to take them. The plants fit perfectly into your fist.

Tsu’tey’s expression immediately brightened, his ears pricking at the evident emotion swimming behind your eyes. Although he looked ridiculously similar to a drowned rat, his fanged smile was nothing short of adorable as your fingers brushed when you took the flowers from him. All of which, you were pleased to realise, weren’t carnivorous or dangerous for you to touch.

<”What’s the occasion?”>

Tsu’tey’s tail stopped mid-wag. <”Occasion?”> He repeated uncertainly. <”Not that I’m not grateful!”> You quickly jumped in, <”they are gorgeous flowers, I was just wondering why you trekked through the forest at the ass crack of dawn to give them to me.”> <”I just wanted to.”> Tsu’tey explained dismissively, not quite meeting your eyes as he looked at your ear or the doorframe at your back. Raindrops slid down his cheeks, before collecting on his jaw and dripping off. An idea caused him to tense. <”Did I do it wrong? Can they only be presented during a celebration?”> <”What? No. Of course not. Flowers are just for when you want to.”> <”Okay.”> Tsu’tey said firmly. <”I should-”> he motioned over his shoulder towards the forest as he retreated a step.

You were blurting out an invitation before he could take another. <”Do you want to come in? I should have plenty of towels to get you somewhat dry.”>

He paused, chewing on his lower lip before nodding.

With care, you ushered him into the airlock, where he still struggled to meet your gaze. He’d been in the compound enough times to know where the new Na’vi respirators were kept, so you left him to it, after removing your exopack.

Padding into the kitchen, you managed to find a tall enough cup to fill with water and set the flowers in until you could get ahold of a proper clay vase. They glowed faintly in the dim room, as they slowly died.

Your dinner was now completely forgotten in the microwave as you puttered around the kitchen, pulling another large cup down from a cupboard and filling it with water. Setting it on the counter, you checked under the sink for some towels only to come up empty handed. The hallway cupboard provided much more successful results, and plenty of warmed towels to get the job down.

By the time you returned to the kitchen, Tsu’tey had sat himself down on the floor and was leaning back against the far wall. The same one he’d leant against whilst holding your human form for the first time. Then he’d been in a similar state of anxiety after watching your avatar collapse in the Well of Souls and assuming the humans had found the compound. Now, he just looked tired.

Scooping up the large cup of water, you approached.

<”Drink this, it should lessen the hangover you’ll wake up with tomorrow.”> <”Thank you.”> He said, gently taking it from you and drinking deeply. It was gone in three gulps, but he didn’t seem to mind. Placing the cup down by his thigh, he held his hand out for a towel, which you handed over willingly. With a sigh, Tsu’tey heaved himself off of the wall and began to wipe himself down.

For a while, neither of you spoke. Tsu’tey busied himself with getting the worst of the rain off and removing his weapons, whilst you bundled up the soaked towels to be dealt with later and strode back and forth from the sink to refill his glass. By the time he deemed himself ‘dry’, Tsu’tey somehow looked even more tired.

<”Right, you’re sleeping in my bunk tonight.”> You instructed, taking the last towel off his hands and adding it to the pile. <”God, it’s feels like it’s been forever since we cuddled like this.”> You motioned to your current body with a cheeky smile, which seemed to have the opposite effect on your mate. <”Do you want to talk about why you’re really here?”> You offered, to which Tsu’tey schooled his expression into a firm scowl. <“No.”> <“You sure. You’re stressed and I want to help you if I can, but I can’t if you don’t tell me what’s going on.”>

<”It’s nothing.”> He deflected, before adding. <”It’s stupid.”> <”Which is it?”> You prodded, knowing from his expression that he was almost there. With another push or two, he would explain and you’d both be able to sleep better tonight. <”It sounds important.”>

He glared with no real heat, but didn’t deny it.

<”You didn’t come here because of the flowers, did you?”> He sighed, <”no. It is about what Jake said at the feast.”>

The quiet admission gave you pause. His eyes were burning now with a hurricane of anxiety and fear. It was clear that Jake’s drunken confession hadn’t only unsettled Neytiri.

<”About the consciousness transfer?”>

<”Yes.”> <”What about it?”> Tsu’tey tensed as if expecting a blow, to which you retreated a step and kept your expression neutral. <”Please, I want to hear your opinion on it.”>

<”You do?”> <”Yes, you are my mate.”> You flickered your gaze down to your wrist, the one with the spiral from his kuru carved into the skin. Delicately, you ran a thumb across the mark, allowing a nostalgic feeling to flicker to life in your chest. <”And this would affect you as much as me. I want to know what you think about it.”> <”Okay.”> Tsu’tey said quietly. <”I don’t want you to do it.”>

He paused again, studying your face for a reaction, to which you gave none.

<”I don’t want you to change.”> He added, averting his eyes as if the admission was a shameful thing to give voice to. <”We’ve only just truly begun to understand and trust each other, and we’re happy. We’re finally happy, and life is good. And now,”> he swallowed, <”now I’m terrified it’s going to be ripped away. The Sky People tried to take you from me twice, and both times they failed. But Eywa, if she takes you, I can’t do anything, and that terrifies me. I don’t care if you’re like this. I don’t care that you’re alien and different. That you dreamwalk during the day and sleep here at night. It doesn’t bother me anymore. And I don’t want to lose it. This. Us. It’s too important to me!

<”I love you in your avatar, yes. I love hunting with you, and riding pa’li together, and messing around because we’re equal in strength. But I also love coming here and being with you whilst you tend to the compound. I love our size difference, I love how you don’t back down from me. I love being able to hold you for hours. I love when you braid my hair and I love that I can carry you around like you weigh nothing. And I love being able to connect with you through Tsaheylu. But most of all, I just don’t want you to leave, not if you don’t have to.”> He swallowed audibly before forcefully composing himself. <“But I also know that that is simply a risk of the procedure, and this is not in fact my decision to make. I understand that. And if going through with the transfer will make you happy, I will support you.”>

<”You would.”> His eyes shone as he finally glanced up and met your gaze. <”Undoubtable, Yawne.”> He said with enough conviction to convince you immediately. If you really wanted to, he would support you. <”Whatever you want to do with your avatar, I will be by your side the entire time.”>

Something within you crumbled like an origami crane under the tightening of a god’s fist. Your carefully schooled expression shattered as a boat load of stress and unresolved tension swept off of you. Tsu’tey’s expression morphed into alarm, his hands coming up to hold you as half-thought out apologies began to tumble out of his mouth.

<”Yawne, I-”>

You hugged him before he could say anything stupid. It was a stretch to reach his neck, even with him sat down, but you managed by standing on your tiptoes. <”You beautiful, wonderful, perfect man you.”> You praised as you cupped his cheeks and kissed his pliant lips. All at once his concern morphed into confusion.

<”I love you.”> You exclaimed happily as your vision grew misty. There was laughter bubbling up in your throat from the force of your relief. Laughter which made it hard to keep peppering him in kisses. You tried regardless.

<”Eywa, how I love you.”> You continued, revelling in how Tsu’tey’s pupils swelled from the claim. <”My other half. My thoughtful, amazing mate.”> Tsu’tey spluttered under the onslaught of affection and praise, his cheeks flushing gorgeously. <”I’m not going anywhere.”> You promised, <”I refuse to if there’s even a chance I won’t be able to get back to you.”>

You promptly released his cheeks to wrap him in a hug. Wrapping your arms around his neck as you cuddled in close. Automatically, one of his large hands came up to steady you, the weight of it stretching across the span of your neck, as sure and comforting as it had always been. He was too starstruck to respond.

<”I don’t need the stupid avatar.”> You said, rambling now. <”I See that now. I don’t need to transfer to be one of the clan. Just as you’ve always said.”>

Tsu’tey’s grip tightened. He curled around you, taking deep steadying breaths as the tension he’d been carrying finally slipped away. You hadn’t noticed during the feast, but after Jake’s confession he hadn’t managed to completely relax into the same headspace he’d been in beforehand. Now, you could hear the relief in his voice as he swallowed loudly. <”I am glad.”> He murmured, and you knew he meant it. With great strength he pulled himself back so he could look down at you, those golden eyes alight with relief and adoration. Gently, he leaned down and knocked your foreheads together as he had done countless times before. <”And I love you too, you infuriating little creature. I wouldn’t change you for anything.”>

Abently, you slid your hand up to one of his fringe braids before tucking it behind his ear. Tsu’tey pressed into the action, causing the braid to fall back where it was, and its ruby red bead to catch the artificial light.

<”Your braids need to be redone.”> You comment simply, giving the hair a light twirl. His roots were beginning to grow out, whereas some of the shorter strands were beginning to escape from the beads.

Tsu’tey’s eyes flickered from the bead tipped braid with a thoughtful hum. <”Well, it is a good thing you seemed to be itching for something to do. Just make sure the partings are straight, I would like to take you up on that offer to share your bunk.”> You let out an indignant noise. <”My partings are always straight.”> Tsu’tey pulled a face. <”Debatable.”> You scoffed, <”and what happened to me being an awful braider?”> <”People can improve.”> Tsu’tey teased, to which you flicked the braid you were holding into his eye. Your mate only grinned before carefully rising to his feet. He still had to stoop to fit inside the compound, but it was nowhere near as awkward of a stance for him as it had once been. With a soft smile, he extended his hand to you, which you took without hesitation. Together, you walked towards the bunk room.

~FIN~

Previous Chapter <- Act 9

Sequel with the addition of son!Spider now available on Ao3 here!

#Tsu'tey x Reader #Tsu'tey #avatar #avatar twow #final chapter #happy ending :)

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thepariahcontinuum · 3 months

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Invidiak - Chapter 09: One Last Scare

Concluding the story and showing some of the fallout of Taylor's attack on the Wards at Winslow.

FF Net

Ao3

#Wormblr #Worm Fanfiction #Worm Web Serial #Parahumans #Taylor Hebert #Skitter #Sophia Hess #Shadow Stalker #Tattletale #Lisa Wilbourne #Emma Barnes #Uber and Leet #danny hebert #Armsmaster #Vista #Final chapter #ending #Sci-Fi #Horror

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calaisreno · 3 months

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The Losing Side, Chapter 9: Coda

The final chapter is up! Wounds are healing. Murders are solved. The world will always need saving, but Sherlock doesn't have to be the one who saves it. Not by himself, at least.

Thank you, readers! It's been a joy to share this with you! 💕

@princesse-lucrece @keirgreeneyes @lisbeth-kk @totallysilvergirl @mydogwatson @chinike @peanitbear @ninasnakie @lhrinchelsea @sentimentalfuturist @loves-to-read-fanfic @lilithcroft @demonicangeling @copperplatebeech @kettykika78 @thetimemoves @raina-at @lololollywrites @starrla89 @grace-in-the-wilderness @discordantwords @mxster-jocale @loveismyrevolution @missdeliadili @itzmi @iamjustreading @7-percent @thegildedbee

#bbc sherlock #johnlock #my fics #the losing side #final chapter #thanks for reblogging!

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night-market-if · 1 year

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Chapter Twelve - Public Release

Here we are! Chapter Twelve is up for the public. If you want to avoid spoilers, please block the tag #end game spoilers

I will probably not be answering any of the really spoilery ones until next week some time.

Thank you to everyone that has helped me get here. I honestly have so many emotions over posting for the last time in book 1. I really hope you all enjoy it.

🪷✨🪷✨ If you want to support me 🪷 ✨🪷✨

Demo 🌿 Patreon 🌿 Ko-fi 🌿Discord🌿Kickstarter

#the night market #public release #twine fic #twine game #interactive fiction #milo next #belladonna malady #gabriel caine #hazel albright #malcolm albright #angst #final chapter

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dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night · 6 months

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Eden part twenty-two

TW: stockholm syndrome, religion, referenced murder, referenced kidnapping, pet whumpee, creep/intimate whumper

Note: After nearly abandoning this story multiple times, I've finally finished it. I hope you all have enjoyed yourself reading this far.

The drive home was a long one. Try as he might, Ezra couldn't convince himself to feel anything but joyful.

Reasonable emotions, befitting of a real person, refused to be sown in the garden of his heart. He was too far gone for that.

The music playing from Christopher's car radio was much the same that played in their house, and Ezra recognized it as Tchaikovsky. Funny, how a month ago he wouldn't have known Bach from Mozart.

"I love you," Christopher said, as though Ezra could possibly forget.

"I love you too." Ezra stared at the fields rushing past the passenger side window, blurs of winter tinted whites and grays. "Thank you for bringing me home."

"I wouldn't have dreamed of leaving you."

Christopher drove like any man who learned in the eighties, with one hand over the steering wheel and the other relaxed as his side. Ezra had learned a far different position, requiring both hands on the wheel, but took advantage of their difference in education to hold Christopher's hand.

"I may have told my roommates your name," Ezra admitted. "That was so fucking stupid of me. They don't know where you live though. And neither of them have the brain cells to file a missing person case."

"I know half the sheriff's department personally," Christopher assured him. "They won't suspect me. And even if they find you, I have no doubt that you'll vouch for my innocence. It isn't a concern."

"Thank God." Of course Christopher knew how to handle things. There wasn't any need for Ezra to worry. "I couldn't live with myself if I got you in trouble for the… um, stalking and kidnapping and murder."

Christopher laughed, much quieter than Ezra, who broke into mild hysterics. What a life. What a life.

After he had calmed himself, Ezra texted his friends goodbye. It was a hard thing to write, but he couldn't leave them hanging again. At the end of his message, he thanked them for all the good times they had together, and promised to stay safe.

Pressing send was far more difficult than he had anticipated. But finally it was over. He threw his phone out the window so it couldn't be tracked, hoping it didn't pollute anything too much.

Ezra smiled at Christopher, wishing for a shorter drive home. He wanted nothing more in the world to cuddle in bed, and never have to get up again. Holding hands during a car ride wasn't nearly enough.

"I missed your smile," Christopher said. "You're so… handsome."

This was the first time anyone had bothered saying such a thing to Ezra, and it took him a moment to process his joy before responding.

"Is that all you missed?" he teased. "And here I thought I was good company."

"Of course not. I got so horribly lonely without you. I'm afraid adopting a cat wasn't a very good substitute for human company."

"You got a cat?"

Ezra knew better than to be jealous, but he wasn't pleased that Christopher had tried to replace him. Sure, it had been his choice to run away in the first place. But that didn't mean that Christopher just got to move on with his life. No. Absolutely not.

"Her name is Gale. I found her catching mice in my garden. She's a bit feral, but a sweet little thing."

"My grandparents used to have cats. It's a Muslim thing, I think. Because they're such clean animals. They were always fostering half a dozen cats at a time and encouraging the people at our local mosque to adopt them. Man, I haven't thought about that in years."

"My family had a lot of animals growing up. Farm animals, mostly. Chickens, hogs, turkeys, sheep, honey bees, all the usual suspects. But a lot of the barn cats and herding dogs were quite friendly."

"I didn't know you grew up on a farm. That sounds really nice. My family always lived in small towns."

"We moved around a lot. I spent my younger years in Moscow, Idaho, among other towns, and finally settled down during my teenage and young adult years on farmland my parents bought. I think my younger siblings were harder to herd than our cats and roosters."

Ezra laughed softly to himself. How, in all their weeks of knowing each other, had he never asked Christopher about his childhood?

The numerous gaps in his knowledge of Christopher's life had never bothered him before this moment. But now he wanted to know everything.

"When did we get so casual?" Ezra asked. "This feels so… different."

"I prefer it." Christopher slowed his car to allow a white tail deer to dart across the road without being hit. "You mean a lot to me. I want you to be happy."

Ezra blinked a few stray tears from his eyes. "You're the only one. I guess you know that, but it's still hard. I wish I had known you for years, instead of just this winter. My life would have gone so much better."

Christopher squeezed Ezra's hand, taking his eyes off the road for a moment. "You're worth everything I could ever give you. I just wish I knew what would make you happy."

"You make me happy. I've never felt better than when I'm with you. I never knew what I wanted from life. Just surviving was nearly impossible. Now I can actually want things. Like warm meals and a cozy bed and lavender tea. Thank you, for everything."

Christopher pulled into his driveway and parked his car. The moment they stepped out of the car, Ezra fell into Christopher's arms, just as he had done so many times before.

It was a welcoming sensation, a sense of security buried within the lack of freedom. Guilt from running away finally melted off Ezra's soul, leaving him to enjoy his life.

When they walked inside, a silver tabby darted up to rub against Christopher's legs. He scratched her behind the ears and left his shoes by the door. Ezra followed his example in both actions.

"Hello Gale," Ezra said softly. "You're a cute little thing, aren't you?"

"I'll start on lunch," Christopher said. "Get settled down."

Ezra wandered through their home, leaving Christopher and Gale alone in the kitchen. Everything was so familiar, the oil paintings hanging on the walls and soft carpet under his feet exactly how he remembered.

But it felt so wrong, seeing the places Jay used to hang around, and knowing he would never see them again. They had sat on the sofa, trusting him to put his arm around their shoulder even after all that torture. It was enough to bring him to tears.

Finally, after all these days of denial and trauma dumping to his roommates, he could process what had happened. Jay was in a better place now. They had to be. Even if Heaven wasn't real, something had to be.

Lunch with Christopher was nice, despite Ezra's melancholy. Even if Jay couldn't have a happily ever after in life, he still could. And he knew they would have been happy for him, in the end.

He finished most of his salad, and let Gale lick his plate clean. Christopher clicked his tongue, but held back on chastising him.

"I want to read Paradiso now," Ezra said. "I know that would be skipping Purgatorio, but I'm in the mood for a tour of Heaven."

"Alright. We can always take a tour of purgatory later. Whatever makes you happy."

Christopher found a leather bound copy of Dante's Paradiso on his bookshelf and sat down beside Ezra on the sofa. His living room smelled more strongly of lavender than the rest of his home, an ornate oil diffuser sitting on the coffee table.

Ezra leaned against Christopher as he started reading. Gale tried to jump on the open book for attention, but settled down on Ezra's lap when Christopher nudged her off.

"The glory of Him, who moves all things, penetrates the universe, and glows in one region more, in another less," Christopher read. "I have been in that Heaven that knows His light most, and have seen things, which whoever descends from there has neither power, nor knowledge, to relate: because as our intellect draws near to its desire, it reaches such depths that memory cannot go back along the track."

Ezra closed his eyes, grounding himself in reality with the aid of fantasy. He had thought, during their reading so long ago, that Hell must smell of lavender. But now he knew that Heaven was much the same.

Unlike Dante in this fictional account of his travels, Ezra would never have to return to earth. He would stay here. In Hell. In Heaven. In Purgatory. Guided not by an ancient poet, but by a kind man who wanted nothing more than to keep him safe.

Blissful eternity had reached them both far before their death. If only Colt and Jay had been half as lucky.

Taglist: @hugh-lauries-bald-spot @thedarkmongoose @whumpsday @whump-by-robin @kira-the-whump-enthusiast @annablogsposts @whumpshaped @seetheothersideofparadise @knittedeyebrowsandcardigans @whatwasmyprevioususername @boonasaurusrex @suspicious-whumping-egg @heavenlyeden @melancholy-in-the-morning @snakebites-and-ink @suck-my-clit-loser @i-eat-worlds @scp-1296 @chiswhumpcorner @skittles-the-whumpee @whumpkinz @dokidokisadness @enbygesserit @canislycaon24 @be-gay-do-crime-ahaha @a-crumb-of-whump @pixelated-whump @whumpytine

#Abraham original: Hot off the press #Whump #Eden #Pet whump #Whump writing #Whump series #Stockholm Syndrome whump #Final chapter #Pet whumpee #Creepy/intimate whumper #Recapture

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copiousloverofcopia · 2 months

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THE TIME HAS FINALLY COME!😭

This is the definite LAST CHAPTER of HOLY MARY!

I got so emotional, so many times while writing this chapter and because of the content I apologize but I need to risk some spoilers for the sake of those who might be triggered so…

⚠️TRIGGER WARNING FOR DESCRIPTIONS OF BIRTH, GORE, MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, INFANT DEATH/LOSS, GRIEF⚠️

Thank you so much for coming on this journey with me, Terzo, and Mary. I can't believe that this all stemmed from an ask on Tumblr that flourished into this full-fledged fic. Thank you so much to the anon that requested this. It was an honor to write it and thank you all so much for reading!

Commissions are OPEN, please see pinned post for Carrd info!

Beautiful divider credit to @gothdaddyissues

Holy Mary

Sister Mary Catherine was only weeks away from taking her vows when she has a chance encounter with a man. A man she finds out is the Pope of the Satanic church.

Chapter 10: The Ultimate Sacrifice

Also available HERE on AO3! Haven’t started yet? Read from the beginning HERE!

Definitely NSFW below!

“Please.” Secondo begged, staring into his little brother’s eyes.

“I don’t want to do this Secondo. Understand that I…I have to….”

1 Hour Earlier…

Lucifer seemed to leave as quickly as “she” came. Terzo was left alone in his thoughts, pondering the horrors that were to come. The blood shed that would be on his hands. Dripping from them in the wake of his decision. Cursed by his own dark god to choose between Mary, his child, and that of his own brother.

The world all together seemed to stop. The sounds of the wind rustling in the trees and birds chirping ceasing around him. Leaving him frozen in the eerie silence. Nothingness—emptiness. Terzo was perched on his knees in a haze when from somewhere in front of him came a voice. Coming closer and closer while the words came into focus.

“Terzo…please come back inside. Let’s talk.” Secondo suggested, wanting to find a way to make things right between them. Settle this rivalry that he had, himself, set in motion.

“Please go.” Terzo snapped, refusing to look at him. Though Secondo would not give up that easily. Never in his life had he felt such remorse. Everyone knew all too well that it was not in his nature to apologize. Growing up as the middle Emeritus son, he was never allowed to be wrong or admit defeat in anything—lest he be held as less than.

All things for him came as a task, one he must meet head on and without hesitance. Always striving to be better than Primo before him and Terzo who followed. Needing to prevail in all things as Nihil’s supposed favorite. Perceived as the most devout of all—only inside he was still a scared, lonely child. Worried that no matter how hard he would try, nothing would ever be enough.

The feeling of inadequacy had been festering inside him so long, though he would never admit it. The constant fear led him further into a path of self-destruction. A path that now had led to the betrayal of his little brother. Lusting for Mary’s love—something he had no right to take from him.

“For what it’s worth, fratello, I know I was wrong…and I’m sorry.” Secondo admitted. His words, eliciting a look of shock from Terzo, though he still refused to look him in the eye. Terzo could tell he was being sincere. The fact that the mere words came from his brother’s own two lips told Terzo it was the truth.

“I know.” was all Terzo could say back to him. His anger, still simmering inside of him as he tried to let it go. There were so much more important things to be concerned with now and whether Secondo knew it or not—Terzo held his life in his hands.

“When you are ready, I hope you both can forgive me.” Secondo told him, his brother nodding as he was left once again alone in the garden. Still on his knees, agonizing over what was to come.

Mary was sleeping soundly, her face almost peaceful as a child's. Primo, keeping careful watch over her and checking in occasionally with the help of the Abbey physician. Reassuring himself that she and the baby were still doing alright. Just as he sat back down in the chair, opposite her in the room, there was a knock on the door. The young newly ghoulettes, Cirrus and Cumulus had arrived with Omega as their charge. Standing in the doorway, excitedly awaiting news of Mary's recovery.

“Please come in Omega, dolcezze.” Primo smiled. The ghoul and ghoulettes bowed as they all carefully walked into the room. Doing their best to not disturb Mary.

“How is she Papa? Is the baby coming?” Cumulus asked, looking at Mary with such concern and care in her glowing eyes. Her devotion towards Mary and her child, touching Primo’s soul.

“Not yet…eh…we must still wait and see. There is not much else we can do at this time. At least that is what they are telling me.” he sighed. Relaxing back into the chair as he old joints hummed with arthritic pain from all his standing.

“Where is the doctor? The nurses?” Omega asked, noting that when he and the ghoulettes arrived at the infirmary there was no one else to be seen. The halls and rooms, appearing empty and silent.

“I believe they had gone into town for some more supplies. With all the wounds, we are quickly running low on bandages and gauze.” Primo explained, his thin smile only barely hiding his concern.

“Primo?” came a soft voice. It was Mary, slowly coming to from her unconscious state. Her eyes, fluttering open to see the four of them all surrounding her. All of them, smiles spreading fast as she tried to pull herself up a bit in the bed.

“Mary, please don’t try to move too much.” Primo told her, rising up as fast as his body would allow. Helping Omega settle her into a comfortable position in the bed.

“Where is Terzo?” she asked, still a bit hazy from her slumber. Feeling achy all over with her head feeling an intense throb.

“He’ll be back soon.” Primo assured her, taking her hand in his and sitting beside her on the edge of the bed.

“He needed to get some fresh air, pretty sure he headed out to the garden.” Omega continued. Mary stared down at her belly. Watching as the little life inside her moved beneath her tightly stretched skin. His kicking, stronger than she had ever felt it before. Ready any day now to come triumphantly into the world. A child that she knew now was destined to be humanity’s undoing.

“I—I shouldn’t have come here. I have placed us all in danger.” she told him. Her voice low, almost a whisper, as if she was scared to have anyone else hear it. Frightened on what she might be asked to do again in her darkest hour.

“Coming here was exactly what you should have done piccola. This child and you belong here with us—with Terzo.” Primo said, squeezing her hand. The tears spilled quietly down and over the round softness of her cheeks. Cradling her belly in her arms as she sniffled back. Trying desperately not to sob.

“He will be the antichrist. Satan will take him as a vessel for evil. We will all be destroyed…” Mary cried, gripped tight to her belly as if she could protect her child from his fate.

“Do you really believe that?” Primo asked her. The two of them, locking in a stare as Mary swallowed back her guilt.

“What else am I to believe? I have condemned us all.”

“You know…many children have been born into the Emeritus family and none of them have destroyed anything. Unless you count my patience.” Primo said, his humor relieving some of the tension in the room. Mary, even laughing along with him through the tears.

“I love him Primo.” Mary said, whipping away the droplets from her eyes. Wishing that it was all a dream. That she and Terzo would live happily ever after like they do in fairy tales. No prophecies or damnation, a child born to them that was no more evil than herself—a sinner who was otherwise good.

“I know you do, and he loves you and that baby more than anything in creation.” Primo smiled. Mary, gently smiling back at him before she tried to straight out a bit more. Wincing after only a moment. Her brow furrowing hard on her forehead as her hand came up to rest upon her swollen belly.

“What’s wrong?” asked Cirrus, rushing over to her bedside.

“Oh no…” she said, her eyes growing wide as the wet spot between her legs grew larger across the sheets. “My water just broke. The baby is coming.”

“Shit.” Omega remarked, but Primo without hesitation took control. Though inside he too was scared. Never in his life did he imagine any of this would come to pass. Most certainly that he would ever need to help deliver a child.

“It’s going to be alright piccola.” he began, turning to face Omega and the ghoulettes as they stood anxiously nearby.

“Omega, get Terzo here now.”

Terzo had sat quietly on the ground. His head hung low between his knees as he tried pulling himself together enough to return inside. Each moment without Mary near was enough to drive him mad. Though he knew now things were once again forever changed between them.

He lifted up his head. Closing his eyes and drawing forth a deep breath as he prepared to stand, when he felt the weight of something on his lap. Opening his eyes to look down at a dagger that laid across him. Small enough to be concealed and sharp enough to slice through bone.

“What the–” He began, lifting the dagger to take a closer look. It was the same one from Gabriel. The hilt, still shimmering with celestial light. Weighted well in his hand as he twisted it around.

“You know what to do.” said a voice. Seeming to come from inside him, “...use their own blade to give me what I ask.” Terzo shook off the thought as he tucked the blade into his coat pocket. Hearing another familiar voice calling out to him.

“Terzo! Terzo!” they yelled. Instantly he recognized it was Omega. The ghoul had quickly turned the corner and came running into the garden clearing. Urgently calling out to him as the ghoul’s face looked frightened and helpless. Unlike Terzo had ever seen before.

“Omega…what—”

“No time, Mary has gone into labor!” he explained. Yanking Terzo off the ground and onto his feet. The two of them, taking off towards the Abbey. His faithful companion unaware of what Terzo had been asked—what he was now certain he must do.

“Just breathe, Mary. He’s on his way.” Primo assured her. Cumulus moved quickly as she began wringing out the washcloth of cool water, placing it back on Mary’s forehead. Her face covered in tears and her body dripping with sweat. The pain of her labor, becoming more and more intense with each passing second.

“Oh…ah…I changed my mind. I don’t wanna do this anymore.” she cried. Her hands gripped tightly to the sheets. Turning white, nails tearing through the fabric as another contraction hit her.

“I think it’s too late for that.” Cirrus told her, peeking her head out in the hall for any sign of Omega and Terzo’s return.

“Ah!” Mary screamed. Primo brought himself down at the end of the bed. Lifting up the sheet to see a gush of blood pouring out from inside her. So much blood that a chill ran through him. Scared that the child may already be gone. Something he knew he couldn’t tell her.

“Mary, please breathe.” he said once again. Trying his best to hide his fears, when suddenly the wounds from the stigmata began opening up. One by one, each of them splitting open again until she was covered in blood. Screaming and crying from all the intense pain. Inescapable and horrifying.

“Oh fuck, it’s tearing through me!” Mary screamed. Her dress now completely soaked in blood from the waist down as Primo and the ghoulettes tried to hold her down. Mary quickly was falling further into madness, bleeding out before them. Cursed with visions of Heaven and Hell, furiously fighting a war that would never be won. Surrounded by blood and gore—the likes of which were of an indescribable amount. Covering all the world as the sound of Satan’s laughter began filling her ears.

As another contraction hit, she screamed again. This time begging for death, for God to take her and spare her baby. Gripped tightly onto Cumulus' hand. The ghoulette’s claws, going numb in her grasp. There was nothing they could do to stop it—this baby was coming and now.

“It’s going to be ok Mary, don’t push yet. It’s too soon.” Primo begged. Watching as she writhed around in the bed. The stigmata wounds, continuing to bleed, spattering across the room as she struggled against the ghoulettes’ hold. Both of them, looking at one another in fear before turning their sights on Primo. Knowing that Mary and her child would likely not make it.

She had lost so much blood. Her screams, turning to a deafening silence. Mary, completely void of strength as her labor continued. Crying softly as she clung barely on to life. All of them, helpless to watch her and her child dying before their eyes. Primo continued doing his best to assist. Holding himself together like he always did in times of crisis. Praying that at least one of them would be spared of this fate.

When all had seemed at its bleakest, Terzo and Omega could finally be heard running down the Hall. Catching sight of Secondo as he too was making his way down to the infirmary. The rest of the Abbey inhabitants lining the halls as the screams from poor Mary had flooded the building—blood curdling cries, sent echoing throughout every square inch, alerting them to the situation. They were nothing but a blur as Terzo and the others burst through the doorway.

“How is she? Oh, Mary I’m so sorry.” Terzo cried, covered in sweat and smeared paint. Filled with horror at the sight of her. Blood everywhere, covering everything around them. His love’s face, pale and stone still. Looking as if she were only moments from death. Terzo realized that it was now or never.

“She’s lost so much blood fratellino, I don't think either of them are going to make it.” Primo told him. The old man’s face filled with more sorrow than Terzo had ever seen at his admission. The rise and fall of Mary’s chest, barely discernible, now slowing as her time drew near.

“This can’t be…we must be able to do something.” Secondo chimed in, the guilt of his covetousness weighing heavily on him. Worried that he had somehow allowed this to happen. That somehow, he too was at fault and that both God and Lucifer had forsaken Mary and her child for his own defiance and greed.

“There—there is something.” Terzo began. The words, barely making it out of him as all others in the room stopped to face him. Waiting for his answer as Terzo swallowed back, tasting the foulness in his mouth for what he was about to say—about to do.

“What is it?” Primo asked, bringing his hands between Mary’s legs to feel for the baby’s head. Its small peak of hair, just palpable from inside her. “We must hurry, I can feel the head.”

“Oh fuck.” Omega gulped, feeling dumbfounded and lost. Terzo slipped his hand within his coat. Pulling from it the blade hidden within. Instantly the tears began to fall from his eyes.

“This.” he told them. All eyes falling to the sharp edge of the blade.

“What?” Secondo asked as Terzo began sobbing. Looking over to Mary as she had all but bled out. Watching the life slip away from her as he stood before his brother. Holding the blade, he was to murder Secondo with, in his hands. Scared he had waited too long and that even now it was too late for Mary and their child to survive. Would he be sacrificing Secondo for nothing?

“I was visited in the garden by Lucifer.” he began, everyone’s attention held in a vice. The presence of the old one, felt even now in the room. Surrounding them in a veiled cloud of darkness.

“And?” Primo said as he and the ghoulettes continued to try and take care of Mary as best they could.

“I was told that the child would be spared its fate as the antichrist if I—I…”

“If you what stronzo? Spit it out.” Secondo hissed, though it seemed to Terzo as if he knew. As if something had told him already that a deal had been made.

“If I kill you.” Terzo admitted, the sounds of gasping filling the room. “But I just can’t.”

“Then do it.” Secondo told him. Realizing this was it—this was his chance, given to him by Lucifer to redeem himself. A chance for him to make things right between them.

“I never wanted to make this choice!” Terzo cried out when suddenly Secondo came to stand before him.

“I said do it! Do it now!” he yelled, taking the blade from Terzo and positioning it against the flesh of his chest. Wrapping Terzo’s hands around the hilt as he continued on. “Kill me now. It’s the only way.” Secondo told him, the hint of tears glazing his eyes.

“But Secondo… I…” Terzo tried to continue. His sobbing, blurring his vision more as he heard Secondo too had succumbed to his emotions. The rest of them, waiting with bated breath as the two brothers reached their inescapable fate.

“Please.” Secondo begged, staring into his little brother’s eyes. His heart aching, pounding—breaking. Both of them were covered in sweat. Chests heaving with labored breath and souls crying out from within.

“I don’t want to do this Secondo. Understand that I…I have to….” Terzo cried, trying to reason with himself. This was the only way to save Mary. To save his child from death.

“Then do what you have to do.” Secondo smiled softly.

“Oh cazzo…Secondo I can’t. I can’t.” Terzo yelled. Cursing the Devil and God alike as he stood with the blade pressed just above his brother’s beating heart.

“I have not been a good brother to you Terzo. Let me do this.” Secondo begged, Terzo pulling away and pacing the room. Feeling as though he may die before being able to make the choice. His whole body aching as each second passed.

“I just…I can’t.” Terzo cried once more. Secondo had had enough. Looking at Mary as she lay in the bed. Covered in crimson red, inches from death. Knowing that deep down this was the only way to save her. Confident that his sacrifice—their sacrifice would fix it.

“Ah!” Secondo yelled, charging towards him. Forcing Terzo to finish him. The blade, plunging deep into Secondo’s chest. Everyone was in shock as Secondo dropped to the ground. The dagger sticking out from his front. Letting go from his mortal coil as a smile spread across his face. It was done.

“Why?” Terzo asked him as he fell to his knees. Kneeling beside him and pulling him close in his arms.

“I love you.” Secondo told him as he began to cough. The blood stained his normally blackened lips, red. The second Emeritus son had slipped away in peace.

“I love you.” Terzo cried as Secondo fell lifeless in his arms. Setting his brother carefully down to the floor in silence. The loudest silence any of them had ever known.

“Terzo…” Mary’s voice rang out in the quiet of the room. Barely above a whisper it managed to carry him as he turned to face her in her severely weakened state. All of them, relieved to hear her knowing she had been spared as promised in the wake of Secondo’s death.

“Amore.” Terzo called out, rushing to her side and taking her hand. Primo could feel the baby’s head was crowning.

“We are almost there.” he told Terzo, trying his best to continue on in the chaos. Feeling, as Mary had another contraction, that the cord was wrapped around the baby's neck. Terzo immediately noticed the look flash across Primo’s face.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, watching his brother work to get the baby out as fast as he could.

“It’s too late.” Mary cried. Terzo, feeling helpless as Primo refused to answer him. Mary brought his hand to her side. Feeling the blood as it began pouring out from the final stigmata wound. The wound had appeared without her even making a whimper. Too weak and far gone to even respond as she began slipping steadily away.

“Oh fuck. No! No!” Terzo yelled as Mary went limp. Primo, working his hardest to help deliver the baby who had managed to come through the birth canal. Removing the ensnarement of the cord. Crushed to find no signs of life as he held the small bundle in his arms.

“Terzo…I’m so sorry.” Primo told him, holding the baby closely in his arms. His face filled with tears. Sniffling back to try his best to speak. “He’s gone.”

“NO! You promised me!” Terzo howled. His voice, cracking in pain as his screams reached both Heaven and Hell. Raging at the universe and all things within it. Ready to burn existence down before him.

I PROMISED YOU NOTHING INSOLENT WHELP.

The voice said, echoing all around them. All of them immediately knew who it came from. God himself, coming to gloat that he had prevailed. Taken everything from Terzo and his beloved Mary.

“God?” Mary asked, barely alive. Knowing that her baby was gone. Her life was destroyed, and she no longer cared about anything. Wishing for her death to come.

You defied me Mary. You refused to erase your sin and now two people have died instead of one.

“You fucking piece of shit!” Terzo growled, wishing he had any control. His son was dead, held still in his brother’s arms. His other brother, lifeless on the floor. The love of his life barely holding on as her own God smugly berated her—blamed her.

“I—” Mary began, somehow managing to continue on.

I am however a benevolent God. I can give you a second chance. Beg me for forgiveness and repent for your sins and I shall heal thee. Welcome you back into the bosom of Heaven. Absolve you of sin.

Mary looked over to Primo, seeing her baby for the first time. His little hand, just visible above the blanket as Primo held onto him. Knowing that he had never been able to draw his first breath. Feel the love she held for him in her heart. A heart now torn in a million pieces. Shattered like glass, never able to be whole again in his absence. She no longer cared about what would happen to her, ready to have God strike her where she stood but not before she said her peace.

“I no longer want your paradise.” she began. Her tears, so intense that her voice could barely continue through them. “You are nothing. Nothing but false promises and veiled wickedness.” she cried, when the sound of hissing came loudly pouring into the room. A snake slithering across the bloodied floor. Gliding in a winding swirl over Secondo's body, before coiling up onto the bed beside where Mary lay. The serpent, beginning to speak to them, though its lips never moved.

“I ALWAYS keep my promises.” it said as suddenly a cry came out from the little bundle in Primo’s arms. The once pale hand, turning pink as the child wriggled in his uncle's arms. Primo, smiling down and crying as the baby announced himself unto the world.

All of them, joyous and shocked that the child was now alive. Mary too was returning to her normal color. The blood that had covered her, slowly disappeared as if it was never spilled. Primo, quickly handing Mary her son. His small face brightly shining as Terzo held the two of them in his arms.

“Our baby.” he cried. The tears now of pure joy as he buried his face into Mary’s hair.

“He’s going to be alright.” Primo told them. Both Mary and Terzo, filled with relief as she turned her sights upward. Addressing God head on as he watched them in annoyance.

“It is in the devil and his servant, my sweet Terzo, that I have found the truth of what you are. The father who would abandon his child for a gentle sin.” Mary yelled. The smile on her face, cold towards her once beloved deity as God’s light shone within the room. So bright that it nearly blinded them.

Be damned then you fool. Enjoy what you have now…until we meet again.

God said, his voice tainted with hatred as the bright light faded away. Disappearing into the ceiling before leaving all of them alone together. The serpent too had disappeared in thin air, just as Terzo and Mary had held tightly to one another. Their little boy cooing away in his parent’s arms.

One Week Later…

It was a rainy day. Crisp and windy, just as he would have liked it, Terzo imagined as he prepared himself for Secondo’s funeral. A day like this was his favorite kind. The energy of a storm on the horizon and the cleansing power of the rain was always something Secondo held dear.

Terzo smiled at the thought. Though his brother may never have thought so, Terzo knew now that Secondo had truly been the best of them. Willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for those he loved. One Terzo would never let anyone forget.

“It’s almost time.” Mary said, coming to meet him. Annoyed to still find him getting dressed in his vestments. Clearly losing himself in thought as the day weighed on him.

“I know, come here.” he smiled, a hit of bittersweet emotions held in his eyes. Holding out his hands as he waited for Mary to give him their son. Little baby Luca, who was sleeping soundly in her arms, looked just like his father in every way.

“Don’t wake him Terzo, I just got him to fall asleep.” Mary pleaded, gently handing him over. The little boy stretched; eyes still closed as he nuzzled into his father’s chest. The quiet hum of his snores and the tiny beats of his heart, felt softly against Terzo’s grasp. Tears falling from his eyes.

“Will he ever know how much he is loved?”

“He will…we will make sure of it.” Mary replied, pushing up on her toes to kiss Terzo’s forehead. Careful to not disturb his paints.

“You were right, you know, all children are gifts from God.” Terzo smiled.

“I just was mistaken on which God.” Mary smiled, “...now let's get going.” she continued, taking the baby back from him as they headed down the stairs towards the chapel.

Terzo was overwhelmed as he walked down the nave. The pews, lined with flowers and plants of emerald, green. All in honor of his brother's color. He tried not to think about it as he approached the sanctuary. The casket staring him down, making it harder for him to keep it together.

This brother’s loss felt heavy among the siblings, ghouls, clergy, and congregation. Terzo wondered if now Secondo could see just how much he meant to others. Just how important he really was. Just before stepping up to the pulpit, to give his final respects, Terzo placed his hand on the top of the casket.

“You were the best of us all.” he whispered, hoping that Secondo could hear him. Sniffling back as he prepared to give his brother’s eulogy. “Thank you.”

Notes:

dolcezze- sweethearts

piccola- little one (feminine)

Stronzo- asshole

#FINAL CHAPTER #Holy Mary #Terzo x Catholic nun #Terzo x OC Mary #Terzo #papa iii #papa emeritus iii #ren writes #ghost #the band ghost #ghost fic #ghost fanfic #ghost fanfics #ghost fanfiction #the band ghost fic #the band ghost fanfic #the band ghost fanfiction

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