#fine why is she doing this LOL. i told them (honestly) i was having issues w like eating sleeping basic hygiene etc which is like maybe tmi

[staytinyville]

OUTLAW (19)

ATEEZ poly!ot8 x Reader

Cowboy AU / Wild West

Series Masterlist

Warning: there is some hardcore name calling on behalf of your parents (scarlet woman type names), your parents are major problems here

A/N BETA READ (@mariana-mmtz). Just know I am reading every single one of your comments and reblogs. Honestly shoutout to @laymegentlytorest for all your reblogs and comments. I love them so much. LOL. I love reading about all of your future predictions!

You all had decided it would be best to go back home the same day. Now that you knew where the boys were camping in, it wouldn’t be much of a hassle. However, the issue with the whole ordeal was that the sun had begun to set as you began your journey back home. That didn’t keep the boys from wanting to get you home, though. Yunho explained to you that it was a good way to stay on your father’s good side. 

Nonetheless, you didn’t realize someone had already tainted that for you. 

As soon as your siblings saw Yeosang’s horse pulling up the driveway, they rushed outside to be the first to greet you. “(Y/N)!” Your sister called, and your youngest brother ran outside along with her. 

The 6-year-old clung to your legs, stuffing his face into your skirts. “What is it?” You asked worried. 

Your sister sighed deeply as she calmly walked closer to you. “Dad isn't in the best mood at the moment.” She pulled back your brother, moving to carry him on her hip. “I thought you weren't going to come back for another day.” She told you.

You took a glance at your house, then back to Yeosang. He looked at you worried, waiting for you to say something. “It’s fine, Yeo. You can go home. I’ll see you tomorrow.” You told him. 

The man only looked at you skeptically, but ultimately decided to listen. He gave you a goodnight and a bow of his head to your sister. 

“What's wrong?” You asked your sister. You two slowly made your way into the house, stopping at the door.

“I tried to tell them it was probably nothing, but they wouldn't listen.” She shook her head.

“Listen to what?” As you walked in, you noticed your father sitting at the dining table with a beer in his hand. 

Your father was never a drinker, only socially. He was a bartender himself, so he knew better than anyone else what it was like to fall into alcoholism. With the way he was looking at you, you knew he started drinking to think about something grave.

“You're back early.” He called out to you. Your mother stopped washing the dishes, turning around to look at whom he had talked to. You gave your sister a look, telling her to take your brother upstairs. 

“Yeah,” You quietly spoke, walking closer. “Yeosang brought me home after Seonghwa said he could get back safely. Is something wrong?” You asked, looking over your father with crossed arms. 

Your mother sighed, going to answer you, but your father was quick to answer your question. “Why didn't you tell us you were seeing that deputy staying in the hotel?”

Your breath got caught in your throat, however, you only gave them a confused look. As far as you know, only a selected few people knew about how you were with Yunho that night. It was an excuse the boys came up with that day you were in jail. Where on earth did your parents possibly hear that?

“Because I'm not?” You frowned. “Where did you hear that?”

“Sheriff Hendricks came to see us earlier. He told us that on the night of those murders you were with the officer.” Your father’s jaw locked up, he looked at you with offense. “Is he the reason you stayed overnight instead of Seonghwa? Was it to be with that man?” He began to talk louder, which began to bother you.

“No, that's not it-” You shook your head.

“Then what is it (Y/N)!?” He stood from his chair. “Why do I have the sheriff coming to my door and accusing my daughter of being a street walker?”

You froze at his words. You gasped out and looked at him with an appalled expression. “A what?” You clenched your jaw. “You'd rather believe a man over your own daughter!?” You took a deep breath. 

“Yes, I'm seeing the deputy. What is the problem?” You agreed, hoping to get your parents to understand that you were not what the gossip was talking about.

“The problem is the entire town has seen you with other men. They said you were with two at one point!” Your father kept going.

You only seemed to grow angrier at the mention of your time-out with Wooyoung and Jongho. You always saw girls around other boys, and yet for some reason you were the one being singled out. “And!? I have friends, Dad. My life is more than just the hotel.” You told him.

“Yes, but these friends are grown men your age!” He stressed. 

“(Y/N), you're at that age where people are going to start assuming the worst of you because you aren't married yet. You have to be careful with how you act.” Your mother softly told you, moving towards you. 

What was the difference if you were 16 or 25? If anything it was worse for girls younger than you because who knew what hormonal teenage boys were doing with them. But no one wants to talk about that. They care too much about the unmarried woman in her 20’s being seen around town with more than one man at a time. It upset you to see that people really didn’t have their priorities straight.

“Ever since those coppers showed up all of a sudden I've seen you out and about with men. Not just one but multiple.” Your father returned to his seat. “This isn't like you. You would never be caught dead speaking to men like that.”

Your anger began to bubble up again. They didn’t know what the boys were truly like. Maybe you wouldn’t want to tell them they were criminals, but they were people who didn’t look down at you. They were the ones who told you for the first time they liked the attitude you had. They welcome you with open arms, even if it took a bit of time to gain their trust. 

Not only that, but they didn’t make you feel like you were a waste of space in the world. 

“Men like that?” You frowned. “Those men have treated me better than anyone ever has. They are the first real friends I've made because no one likes the way I act. They don't make me feel like I have to change.” Tears began to swell in your eyes. 

“They actually want to know me.” You spoke quietly. 

“Sweetie, they are men.” Your father shook his head. “They only want one thing. You really think that many men would be after you if they didn't have something in mind.”

You had never once thought of the boys in any way that wasn’t platonic. After your kiss with Mingi you started to see them differently, but never once had you thought about any of them doing those kinds of things to you. With what has transpired to you weeks ago, you knew that was going to be far from their minds. 

Wooyoung was a flirt and the boys started to get more comfortable with you to give compliments and call you sweet names, but they never pushed you to do anything with them. They were gentlemen who respected your space. They wouldn’t push you to do something you didn’t want. Even if there was still a lot you were missing about their stories, you knew them well enough to know they would never.

“I thought that was what you wanted?” You tried to stay at an even tone, not wanting to raise your voice at your father. “You told me to get on Yeosang's good side. Get him to marry me.”

“Yeosang isn't going to marry you if you're a pros-”

“(F/N)!” Your mother screamed before he got the chance to finish. 

You almost stumbled back from the sudden whiplash of emotions. Your anger seemed to fall from your shoulders as you looked at your father with a blank stare. The only thing you could feel crawling up your body was shame. Shame that your parents would ever think of you so lowly. The thought of knowing that they would rather listen to gossip they’d hear on the street than your own words. It made you disappointed.

“A what?” You whispered. “If I'm a what?”

“(Y/N)-” Your father sighed regretfully. 

“Say it!” You screamed at him. 

When he wouldn’t look you in the eyes, your lips began to tremble as your chest started to tighten. With a stomp of your foot, you whipped around to run out the house.

“(Y/N)!” Your parents rushed after you. “Get back here!”

Series Masterlist

@thefrog3223 , @iarayara , @0rangemilk , @explorewithd , @detectivedoodle , @bangtanxberm , @a1i33a , @loveforred , @drunken-deitence , @0325tiny , @the-ghostest-with-the-mostest , @atinyreads , @atinytinaa , @lexiigom , @smilingtokki , @mismatchfluffysocks , @brain-empty-only-draken , @sousydive , @alex-tinyy , @h3arteyes4mingi , @onedumbho3 , @popcatx0 , @blue1amory , @mommahwa1117 , @stvrfir3 , @sunnyhokyu ,

#kpop fanfic #ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez imagines #ateez x reader #ateez wooyoung #ateez hongjoong #ateez san #ateez yeosang #ateez mingi #ateez jongho #ateez yunho #ateez seonghwa #fanfiction #atiny #choi san #kim hongjoong #park seonghwa #kang yeosang #jeong yunho #song mingi #jung wooyoung #choi jongho

[kingofthering]

thinking about your beautiful rosquez fake dating au.... is it a public thing? like are they the motogp royal couple here (INSANE time to be in the paddock lol. and oh GOD the breakup) or is it strictly a performance for their friends/family? (also insane for marc specifically. that man cannot lie to alex ever change my mind) like i cant stop thinking about it...

I was thinking performance for their friends and family but with a couple of things to consider [because I never make my life easy, do I]:

my considerations of this kind of depends of the span of the fic and how long they are pretending before going into the actually dating phase [I think Valentino probably freaks out (mostly because of what Marc said) after that first time they sleep together and then putting it short : he ghosts Marc, Marc confronts him and they start hooking up regularly and then there is another big family thing (maybe Christmas if the fic started in the summer) and Valentino forgot he was supposed to fake break up with Marc at some point and anyway, they figure their shit out, the end] [divorce still happens in 2015, see you in 2024 for the reconciliation]

but in the grand scheme of things, they're only doing this to trick Valentino's mom (and like, all the aunts and uncles and everyone that gets involved after the dinner and the baby shower) (oops, things are getting out of hand, it's fine Valentino, it's fine) so that's the only thing they both have in mind when dealing with the secret

now, who was present at the ranch that summer to hear about this? probably the Academy kids that were all in either Moto2 or Moto3 at the time — do they really have to interact with Valentino's family and eventually lie to them? eh, I'd say it's a possibility, and does Valentino trust those teenagers to lie for him? absolutely not, does he trust them to keep their mouth shut about his relationship with Marc if he sat them down and told them it was important? yes, much more (and like, who would believe them in the paddock anyway, him and Marc together? please)

I think Luca can be the big joker/question mark here, on the one hand Valentino would feel shitty making Luca lie to his mom but on the other end Valentino feels shitty lying to Luca, so, 50/50 on that one for now

which means, that in my mind, Marc doesn't even have to bother about his side of the family, I fully agree with you that that man cannot lie to his brother and honestly, he would probably already spill the bean when his stay at the ranch gets extended and Marc asks him why on the phone

technically, could Valentino's mom talk to Marc's parents and fuck things up? I suppose, if I want to make my life annoying, that it could be a possibility, but I don't think Valentino's mom was in the paddock often so I'm just gonna eliminate that issue for this one universe [and like, could she have their number? also yes maybe in a universe that would be annoying to me]

in the grand scheme of things, Marc is agreeing to this 10% to help Valentino and 90% for personal selfish reasons and because in theory, this doesn't have any real flaw/annoyance for him, right? — do I think that he would have felt comfortable lying to his parents? absolutely not, I do think that would be quite interesting to explore in fic but again, making my life easy here [the whole "Valentino can put on a performance act while Marc is an open book to people who know him" of it all]

Now, to come back to that first option, the first thing that came to mind was a forced to come out scenario, especially if it happens because of leaked photos of them hooking up when having hate sex in say, 2016. Way angstier in the beginning but then it's indeed "what an insane time to be in the paddock" in a good way after they've fixed things.

[admittedly I don't always see how going the "yes we're gay but we're in love" way is better PR management than "our private lives should have never been hindered, that's all we have to stay about the matter" but, you know, fic purposes]

I think it could actually bring quite a different aspect to their dynamic in that scenario because if this is 2016, Valentino is 37 (9 titles and could technically retire with a long well-done career) and Marc is 23 (4 titles, still an immense way to go in his career and so much potential to explore).

Of course the whole thing affects Valentino but he honestly believes he can survive that whatever way and ignore the bad people and focus on keeping the same life, he'll be fine. Marc will say that he's not affected by what people say about him (and only on track things matter) but I don't think it's that easy, especially back then, especially after all the backlash he got post-Sepang, and when he puts his own 2015 anger aside, I think Valentino can recognize that as well.

It's Valentino looking at Marc seating next to him in the Yamaha/Honda (whichever) motorhome, watching the way Marc's knee keep bouncing at lightning speed, the lines of his face harsh, his eyes pointed on a far point on the wall. It's Valentino shutting his brain down and going "Yes, we'll do that, where do we start".

#rpf #4693 #marc marquez #valentino rossi #fake dating rosquez #oops I created a second AU at the same time my bad................. #this is a very simplified version of things #(as we've seen way too recently with fabio's insta post there is still a long way too go with homophobia and motoGP) #(but as it always is : beauty of fits universes etc etc) #thank you for the ask sorry for the way too long answer #I go into details way too much sometimes #forced coming out au

[awkwardgtace]

Intimidating Presence

day 20 intimidate

next one that fits the trope @jakersdaboss

honestly this title is probably bad titles are hard i don't have a good one lol

Dabria is tired of the gossip in the town when the nearby giant watches them. She decides talking to the giant will solve the issue

Intimidating Presence

“It came back today”

“I heard it stomping, I almost thought I heard its stomach.”

“It looks fed why would it keep coming here?”

“That monster’s eaten plenty, it doesn't need our village as a part of it.”

“Something has to be done before it decides to make a snack out of us.”

“It might get bored if we stay cautious, just don’t let it see anything when it’s looking. It’ll be fine.”

Dabria glared at the gossiping townsfolk as she passed. This was the third week of them acting like the giant was some heartless monster. They hadn’t hurt anyone or even gotten that close. They would just come near the end of the day, when the sun was setting and watch. It had her curious, but if they wanted to kill anyone it would have happened by now.

She slammed the door as she arrived home. The things on the wall shook from the force. This was getting ridiculous. Stalking through her home she went searching for her boots and a hiking bag. She would get to the bottom of this. Those gossipers would learn to be quiet. Judging someone from their appearance was just rude. They should have learned from their gossip about her.

“What are you doing?” she jumped when her husband’s voice sounded. She turned around, a bit of a blush on her face. She hadn’t told Vitus her idea, hadn’t even thought it all the way through. He looked tired, his usually cleanly tied hair was a mess. The bags beneath his green eyes screamed for sleep. She walked up, wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder.

“I’m going to go talk to the giant?” she said. The chuckle from Vitus made her smile. He wrapped his arms around her, kissing the top of her head. Sometimes it was easy to forget they were the same height. He felt like a giant most of the time.

“Oh? Were you going to tell me or was I going to find out when you never came to bed tonight?”

“I was going to tell you… probably.” His arms tightened around her.

“Dabria, are you sure about this?”

“I don’t know. They haven’t hurt anyone, just watched us. And all those people gossiping all the time is just cruel. At least knowing would be better than all of this.” She pulled away to look in his eyes. “Vitus, are you going to stop me?”

He leaned forward and kissed her quickly. “No, just come back safe. I know you can take care of yourself. Besides, you wouldn’t run headfirst into danger without me. Unless that was you asking for me to come along?”

Dabria laughed and pulled away from him. She had to finish packing to head out. The giant would be leaving around sunset and that wasn’t too far off. She was going to follow them. “Far from it. It wouldn’t do to take the only doctor off on a dangerous adventure now would it?” 

“I guess that’s fair. I’m going to take a nap, wake me up before you go?”

“Of course I will.”

Dabria passed the day gathering anything she could think of. A lantern for the dark, food in case she got lost. A map, a compass, water, even a book if she had to wait for them to come back. When she woke Vitus up just as the sun set he laughed at her. She had probably gone overboard, but she wanted to be prepared. Another quick kiss and she was off. The only thing left behind the thing that would tell the giant what she was.

Just as she expected, the giant was watching the town. Their face was covered by shadow. It made it impossible to tell what they were planning. If they were up to something bad it would have happened by now. She kept repeating that as she walked through town. It wasn’t that late, but it was horribly quiet. No one in town wanted to risk facing the giant’s wrath. A wrath she doubted existed.

She managed to reach the edge of the village just as the giant stood. From here they actually looked a bit smaller than she’d heard giants should be. A lot smaller actually, the trees were just at their height. They turned around, world shaking steps leading far from the village. She almost wanted to call out to them.

“Thank the heavens it’s leaving. It looks so hungry every time it watches us. That stomach looks plenty full already.”

“I still say the guard should chase it, maybe even kill it. We don’t know when it will get bored.”

“What if it wants us as toys?”

“Even worse, what if it wants pets?” The world shook as the giant walked away.

“I don’t know what’s worse, being a toy, a snack or a pet? I mean those hands-”

“Oh quiet down already!” Dabria yelled. The two peeking out of a window jumped at her shout. “You know nothing about them. If they were going to hurt us they would have by now.”

“What makes you say that? What is all that you’re carrying?”

“Nothing you need to worry about. Go back to your pointless gossiping. I’ll just prove you wrong like always.” Dabria started walking away from the rude people of this town. Sometimes she wanted to leave, but Vitus was all they had for medicine. Despite how foolish some outspoken members were, neither could leave the kind ones.

“You’re gonna die if you go out there! Better not take the doctor along with you!”

“I’m alone, obviously he’s not coming.”

Dabria kept walking, ignoring what the gossipers shouted after her. The giant's steps were still vibrating through the ground. She wondered if they even knew how it felt to others. She’d ask about it once they met.

As her trek into the forest truly began she realized she would be walking for a while. She used the footprints the giant left to guide her. Another sign that didn’t add up, the one she knew was much bigger than this. She shook off her thoughts, refocusing on her goal. Tonight she’d meet the giant.

The walk through the forest was mostly quiet. Now and then a strange sound was carried on the wind. It made her curious, but the giant could always help her find it. They were probably just in between their travels. It was normal enough for a giant to linger near a town, it was half of why she knew anything about them. One that would be around her home village. They visited every so often, even helped when others got lost.

The noise was getting louder as she walked. Something about it was familiar. She couldn’t quite pin it down, but didn’t want to let that distract her. She had to find the giant and talk to them. Although it might have been smarter to wait for them near the village. One day she needed to start thinking her plans through. That was for another night though. Tonight she had to find the giant.

After a while of walking under the stars she saw a clearing. A bit of hope entered her chest, the footprints led there. She ran forward with a burst of energy, pushing away the worry as the sound grew louder. She paused just before entering the clearing to look for the giant or the source of the sound.

Dabria’s heart broke when she found both. The giant was sitting in the clearing, knees hugged to their chest. From what she could see this was a young boy alone in the woods. She couldn’t believe the villagers had been gossiping about this poor boy for weeks. The source of the sound were the sobs that wracked the child’s body. She took a step forward, a twig cracked from her weight.

The boy’s head snapped up. His eyes were cat-like, reflecting strangely in the dark. She could just make out the golden color as he tried to glare at her. She walked out of the shadows and tried to get closer. The boy actually growled at her, she had never known giants could growl. Bared fangs shone under the stars, but that only made her more concerned.

There wasn’t anger in the eyes meeting her though. This was a scared child his size didn’t change that. She took another step, but he leaned back. He was afraid of her, that only made her more concerned. She sat down where she was, pulled her bag off her back, and pulled out some of the food she packed.

“I know it isn’t much for you, but I skipped dinner and don’t like to eat alone,” she said, a smile on her lips. The boy was frozen for a few seconds, but he did eventually lean forward. “Would you care to join me?”

Dabria held out some of what she brought. It was just an apple, the other sitting in her lap. She wasn’t sure what to expect in the reaction. The boy didn’t jump at the chance to get closer, studying her. He was smart, trusting a stranger like this wouldn’t be the best thing to do. So she waited with her arm outstretched for him to answer.

Eventually he did move. He brought a hand closer to her, moving it right past the apple to surround her. She tried not to let her fear at his choice show, he was scared and wanted to scare her. She wasn’t running from a child who was clearly on his own. His hand stayed partly wrapped around her, but there was room for her to run.

“Run, I-I’ll hurt you. I’ll do all the things you people think I will. Every single one,” he said. His voice was hoarse. Most likely from lack of use. It only made her more upset. She didn’t react to the empty threat, instead setting the apple on the top of his hand.

“I’m not running, and I don’t think you’re going to do anything. To me or anyone else in the village,” she smiled again. All of this was laced with hope that he’d listen. Trust her even.

“Liar. I know what you all say about me. I-I’ll do it. You better run.”

“I’m not running so I guess you’ll have to do those bad things, won’t you?”

Silence settled around them. She could hear the soft bustle of forest life as he considered her words. He could act on them. Hurt her, make her a toy, a pet, or a snack, but she knew he wouldn’t. The golden eyes staring at her weren’t ones here to hurt anyone. They were lonely and scared, something she fully intended to fix.

The fingers around her started to shake. She stared up past the hand at the boy. He looked more afraid than when she arrived. He started to close the bit of space he left. It made her wonder how much space she’d take up in his hand when she was standing. Either way she kept watching him as tears pricked his massive eyes.

“I-I can do it. Really I will. You should run before it’s too late,” he said. The boy was trembling and Dabria grew more worried about him. She reached out a hand and set it on the fingers around her.

“You can, but you don’t have to. It doesn’t look like you want to. We can always just talk instead,” she tried to squeeze the finger her hand was on to reassure him. That made him pull away from her. Fear in his golden eyes.

“Y-you’re just here to make me leave right? Go away, I won't go near that place again.”

“I’m not here to make you leave.” The boy jumped. “I came out here to talk to the giant and find out what they’ve been doing. Now I’m out here to talk to you. So… I’m Dabria, what’s your name?”

“Felix… I’m Felix.”

“Nice to meet you Felix. Would you be willing to tell me why you were crying?”

Dabria noticed the apple had fallen when he pulled his hand away. She carefully stood to pick it up. Felix flinched and slid back from her. It hurt her heart. A young boy was so scared of her. Scared of someone who usually couldn’t do much to hurt him. Unless he knew what her eyes meant. She doubted that though.

“D-don’t come closer,” he whined. Dabria moved slowly, exaggerating her movements. She bent to grab the apple and returned to where she was sitting. Dropping the fruit in the bag.

“Don’t worry. I just wanted to get the apple I tried to give you. I won’t get any closer,” she promised. Felix nodded at her, seeming more tense than before. She took her seat on the ground and looked up at him again. “So instead of why you were crying, how about why you watch the village?”

Felix buried his head in his knees. It didn’t look like he wanted to talk about anything at all. Dabria nodded to herself and reached into her bag again. She pulled out a book that she brought along. It wasn’t too much for a child, at least not when she knew the parts to skip.

“Ok, so you don’t tell me anything. I’ll just read a book. I hope you don’t mind, but I like to read outloud.”

Felix didn’t answer so she opened the book and started to read. At least she pretended to read. Instead she told a story that she knew as a child. One that told of a giant who traveled the world. Acting as a hero for the small people around them. She smiled as Felix reacted. His eyes blown wide in wonder.

As she continued the story Felix started to relax. He stretched out his legs next to her. His foot was probably taller than her. She took the chance to look him over. The clothes he wore were covered in holes. His face had dirt on it. This child was still young, at most six, but more likely five. She wasn’t leaving him alone no matter what.

By the time she reached the end of her ‘book’ he’d leaned close. Hovering over her in a way others might be worried over. All she could see on his face was the excitement as the giant hero fought a villain. As they won the day and were celebrated by everyone. Human and giant alike in honor of this one hero. She smiled up at him when she closed the book.

“The end,” she said. Felix’s eyes were filled to the brim with hope. There was a solid minute before he realized what he was doing, how he hovered. She hadn’t even noticed his hand set next to her so he could lean closer. Now she understood, he wanted pictures with the story.

Felix’s cheeks turned bright red as she looked at him. He quickly pulled back, sitting far from her again. His legs started moving, but she reached out and grabbed his pants before he pulled completely away. He froze as soon as her fingers brushed the fabric. He looked scared again, the awe already fading.

“You don’t need to scrunch up again, I can tell another story if you want.”

Felix stared at her. It was the first time since finding him she saw the predatory looks giants often had. Looks that she knew other humans sometimes found scary, but she knew what they really meant. That they were trying to see the smaller things around them. To understand the world that never truly seemed to suit them

He didn’t pull his legs back. She took her hand away and watched the giant child lean forward again. A hand set next to her, fingers up this time. He was scared still, but not pulling away. It was something she considered a win. Something making progress.

“You… really aren’t gonna send me away?” he asked. His voice shook, the trembles spread through his body. Dabria stood walking slowly towards the hand near her. She put one of her own on the tip of his finger.

“I’m really not here to send you away. I’m doing a pretty bad job if I was,” she laughed. A tear splashed down near her. Looking up she found the crying face of the giant child.

“I-I just wanted to watch… I-I…”

“Shush, it’s ok. You can come watch, even talk to us.”

“N-no. I heard them talking… they don’t like me, call me a monster… I-I am one…”

The sound of sobbing echoed around her. It was just as bad as she heard on her way here. It made the body of this child shudder. Even worse than his fear. She looked at the fingers near her, making a choice as soon as she noticed the way they trembled.

“Felix, have you ever picked up a human or a small animal?” He nodded. “Ok, then why don’t you pick me up?”

“I-I-I…”

“It’ll be ok, I trust you. Would you rather me climb on your hand?”

Felix shook his head again. Slowly fingers that would grow to tower over her wrapped around her. She was held loosely as they closed around her. His other hand was beneath her feet before she had a chance to dangle. Both his hands brought her up as he sat up straight again. They were still trembling and the sobs hadn’t stopped.

“Good job, can you bring me closer to you now?”

“O-ok.”

Felix brought her close. He held her right in front of his face. She waited for him to pull his hand from around her. It took time for him to do it. She watched him move it below the one she stood on. The whole time she struggled to keep standing straight. The trembles traveling through his body wanted to knock her down. She wouldn’t let that happen.

Using all her strength she moved forward. Barely able to reach Felix’s face. She spread her arms wide and pressed against him. He immediately met her, pressing his whole face into her body. Tears fell again, soaking her as he cried. She didn’t mind.

“It’s ok Felix, you can cry all you need,” she whispered.

The moon traveled through the sky as he cried. It was a lake’s worth of tears and she didn’t care. Not for one moment did she pull away from the child that so desperately needed someone in that moment. Eventually he moved. Pressing one of his hands to her back and holding her more tightly. She didn’t feel fear for a moment.

Fingers wrapped around her again. Tears never stopped. She started to run her hand over his skin. Just a small reassurance. His grip was tight, but far from enough to hurt her. She closed her eyes and pressed her forehead against him. She wouldn’t stop this until he was ready.

“S-sorry,” he whispered. His hands started to move, but she smacked her hand against his fingers.

“Don’t be sorry,” she said. She pressed her hands into his skin again. “Do you feel better now? You can keep crying if you need to.”

“M-mom and dad used to say I shouldn’t cry around humans… It’s not good to do that. Th-they said humans wouldn’t like it…”

“Well I’m here and I don’t mind you crying. I’d rather you cry until you don’t need to anymore. You don’t even have to tell me why.”

“I miss mom and dad. They told me to run and they’d find me, but they haven’t. I-I’m scared they aren’t coming. I’m… I’m really lonely…”

“Oh Felix, how long has it been?”

“A-a while. Humans made me leave the other places they told me to wait. This is the last one.”

“Well you aren’t being made to leave here. You can wait as long as you need. You can even stay with me.”

Felix pulled her away. His fingers left her again and she watched him wipe his eyes. She noticed a bright red mark on his hand. A gasp left her that had his hand beneath her again right away. His fingers were around her immediately, but that didn’t change her worries.

“What happened to your hand?” she asked. Felix pulled his hand away from her and looked at the mark.

“Oh… I tried to look at a fuzzy brown animal. I thought it was cute, but it got mad and scratched at me. It’s fine,” he said. He shoved his hand behind his back. Dabria crossed her arms and looked up at the giant boy who only seemed ashamed of his injury.

“Felix, why don’t we go back to my house? My husband is the doctor in the village. We can have him look at the cut on your hand.”

“No the-the other humans are always talking about me. They’ll be mad and make me leave or worse…”

Dabria waved him closer, happy when the boy listened. She set her hands on his face and stared into one of his golden eyes. “If they do anything then I’m leaving with you. You aren’t going to be alone again. You’ll have me no matter what.”

“Promise?”

“I promise. So let’s go ok? Just take us back to the village and I’ll tell you where to go after.”

“Shouldn’t I put you down?”

“Nope, it’s a lot faster if you carry me. Oh just let me down so I can get my bag, ok?”

Felix nodded. His fingers wrapped around her again, just like when he lifted her. He pulled his lower hand away before lowering her to the ground. It wasn’t the best way for him to handle her, but that was something to figure out later. They’d both be learning for a while. She grabbed her bag before turning back to him. She watched the young boy shift to be kneeling. His weight was enough to make her stumble.

There was the smallest wonder if she was making a mistake. If her life as she had lived until now would be ruined accepting this giant into her home. It faded away when his golden eyes locked on her again. His size didn’t matter, the eyes staring at her felt more like a scared animal than a threat. She wouldn’t abandon him. She was worried how he’d look in the sun, if his hair was a mess or his clothes were even worse than she could see with the moon. 

“A-are you ready? M-Miss Dabria?”

Dabria smiled, walking a bit forward. “I’m ready, and just Dabria is fine. I already said I trust you, I mean it Felix.”

“O-ok.”

Fingers wrapped around her again. His other palm was beneath her feet before she could think. It seemed like he was just the type to grab, it wasn’t such a bad thing. He was careful every time. She was lifted up to his chest, held near the panicking heartbeat of a young child. Another thing that broke her heart.

He kept his hold on her as he stood. The height he had was still intimidating to see despite sitting in his hand. She couldn’t even start to guess how big he’d be when fully grown. If he was even a normal height for giants now. There was so much she didn’t know when it came to taking care of him. So much she’d make sure to learn.

The first step Felix took made her suck in a breath. It had his fingers tightening around her as he moved. He paused, looking down at her with fear. He was just as nervous as she was. A nervousness that she would find a way to ease. She thought about it for only a moment before having a solution to his worries.

“Felix, why don’t you just curve your hand against your chest to hold me? That way you have a hand free.”

Felix didn’t say anything, but did as she suggested. The fingers slipped away and she was pressed against his chest. It was more than she expected, but another thing to work on. He took to walking again. This time his steps seemed more confident. She smiled as he walked, if he was confident she could be a little uncomfortable.

As he walked she thought about Vitus. He didn’t think she was going to bring the giant home, he would have said something if he did. She was worried this time it might push him too far. That he wouldn’t stand by her when she made a crazy decision. He stood by her through the gossip in every village they visited, but adopting a giant child might be too far. 

Felix’s hand tensed around her. That just proved it didn’t matter. If Vitus wouldn’t stand by her this time then she’d leave. She didn’t have his medical knowledge, but she had the best chance of caring for a giant. She could get the clothes and shelter he’d most likely need. Felix’s hand flattening made her squeak as she fell back.

Looking around she saw the village nearby. She climbed to her feet to look around for a moment. It was dark, no sign of anyone. The only light she could see was the one from a window in her own home. Vitus probably fell asleep with it on. He would usually try to wait up for her, but his limit was always near dawn. Her own heart was hammering at how he’d act. If he’d just adopt the giant child like she had.

“Do you see that house on the other edge of the village? With a glow to it?” she asked. Felix nodded. “Just head over there. That’s where I live with Vitus. Where will work out a place for you to stay too. You shouldn’t be sleeping alone in the woods.”

Felix nodded again. He curved his hand up a bit this time, more like she’d first intended. He took his steps slowly. Each one left no sign of his movement. He did know how to be careful around humans, another good thing. Teaching him caution would have been a bit hard, still doable. Although it did stand out he didn’t speak.

“Felix,” she called his name, but got no response. Her home was almost below him by now. Traveling with a giant was a much better speed. “You can talk when you hold me like this. I’m not going to break. I didn’t earlier.”

“...ok,” he whispered. It was better than the silence. He was too aware of himself now that they were at the village. She’d work on his comfort later. “We’re here… I think.”

“Yup, just let me down and I’ll be right back ok?” Felix slowly lowered himself to be sitting. Then he wrapped his fingers around her and pulled her from his palm, letting her down just outside her home. The home she was a bit worried about entering. “Now wait here while I get what we need for your hand, ok sweetheart?”

“Ok.”

Dabria walked in, dropping her bag to the side as she moved. Slowly she made her way through the house, grabbing what Vitus normally used for wounds. She replaced some things. A sheet rather than gauze. A bucket for cleaning it rather than the small dish Vitus always used. All that was left was what he used to sanitize it.

“Vitus, honey are you up?” she called into the house. Above her she heard a shifting chair followed by creaking steps as he came down to see her. If she hadn’t learned to read him she’d think he was unphased. His eyes had widened just a bit, his lip twitched slightly. He was confused. “Where do you keep all the disinfectant? I think I’ll probably need what we have on hand.”

“What are you doing?” he asked. It didn’t stop him from going around the room to gather a number of his own tools. She pouted when he grabbed the small disinfectant he always kept nearby.

“Felix is hurt and I’m going to take care of him. Also I told him he could stay with us.” There was a bit of fear behind her words. How would Vitus react?

“Felix? Is that the giant?” Dabria nodded and Vitus hummed. Sometimes it was even hard for her to read him and she hated that. This was one of those times. “Well, let’s go take care of his wound.”

Dabria smiled as Vitus followed behind her. She hadn’t told him that the giant was a child yet, but that shouldn’t matter much. She hoped. Together they walked out, she grabbed her staff on the way. There was no chance she’d leave this child unsheltered for the night. When they walked out she bit back a laugh.

Felix was on his knees with his head on the ground. One hand near the door as he tried to look in after her. He was such a curious child. His eyes filled with fear when he saw Vitus and it froze him in place. Vitus shot her a look, one she still couldn’t quite read. He stepped forward, but that got Felix moving. He sat up straight, the movement sent both her and Vitus stumbling back. As soon as she looked up she saw tears in his eyes.

“I-I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” Felix mumbled. She saw the way he tensed, ready to jump up. Before she could say anything, Vitus stepped forward.

“Don’t be sorry, I’d be curious too. You can look inside more tomorrow, the sun will make it easier,” he said. Dabria smiled, she could hear it in his voice already. Vitus would stand by her this time too. “I’m Vitus, Dabria said you were hurt, can I see it?”

Felix hesitantly brought his injured hand close. Vitus stepped forward, not even blinking at the giant hand. Felix was trembling again. After a few seconds Vitus turned to her and grabbed the bucket with soap she’d brought outside.

“This will sting, but we want to make sure you stay healthy while it heals. Ok?”

“Ok,” Felix’s voice was a whisper again. He was such a kind child.

Vitus focused on cleaning the wound. Felix actually growled at the contact, but Vitus didn’t even flinch. It didn’t stop the giant child from looking guilty. Dabria walked up and offered Vitus the towel she’d brought outside. He dried the wound before holding up the disinfectant he’d brought out.

“You know this doesn’t need as much as you thought,” he smiled. Felix twitched when it hit his wound, this time knocking them both back. Neither were bothered, but tears fell from the giant’s eyes. Vitus just took the sheet from her and quickly put it on Felix’s hand. “You’re doing a great job Felix.”

“He’s right, most of the time no one would sit still like you,” she said.

“Felix, how old are you?”

“F-five… but I’m gonna be six soon!” His voice was louder than it had been before. He quickly shrunk back, but Vitus chuckled.

“You’re the calmest five almost six year old I’ve treated. I need you to hold your hand up a bit so I can tie this around your palm.” Felix did as he was asked. Vitus shot her a look as he tied the sheet. “There, we’ll keep it clean so it heals safely.”

“Thank you.”

Dabria smiled at the words. Felix would fit in soon enough. Vitus gathered everything she brought out and took it back inside. She had to figure out how to make him shelter. Her staff would make it possible to get a home built, but she needed an idea of how big to make it. She didn’t want to make it again every few years.

“Dabria?” Vitus’s voice made her jump. He’d come out with a book she hadn’t seen before. “With a few measurements we can probably guess how tall he’ll be later to make a place for him.”

Felix had started to loom again. Such a wholesome curiosity. She smiled at Vitus as he came over to her. Holding open the book she took a look. She knew how tall her staff was and that would give her what she needed.

“Felix, can you put your hand flat on the ground for me?” she asked. Felix did exactly that, tensing when she brought her staff close. She decided to distract him as she measured his hand. “Did you know when we moved here they told mean rumors about me too?”

“Why? You’re human…” His innocent question actually made Vitus laugh. Humans knew what her traits meant, a young giant never would. It did make the giant child shrink back.

“She isn’t human, she’s a witch,” Vitus smiled. He moved closer; he was just as calm around this giant child as she was. “Humans like to tell rumors about what they don’t understand. That includes someone bigger than us, or our size and a little special.”

“I’d say I’m more than a little special. You did happen to marry one of the strongest witches of this generation.” 

It was a point of pride she’d never ignore. It helped that she finished measuring just as she spoke. Looking in the book she had a guess, a guess that left her heart pounding. He’d get a lot bigger, big enough to be a threat even she would struggle against. That nervous look in his eyes made the nerves budding in her heart die.

“What does that mean?” Felix asked. Dabria held her staff at arms length, turned horizontally. A glow started to emanate in a circle around her.

“You should make sure to change our house while you’re at it. He shouldn’t be separated from us if he’s staying with us,” Vitus said. It made her smile, his acting like this is part of why she loved him. She closed her eyes, focusing on her conjuring spell. There was enough catalyst left in her staff for this. A whine came from above her. “Felix, it’ll be alright. She’s not doing anything bad, it’s why we live on the edge of town. The clinic is deeper in the village.”

Dabria smiled to herself at the reassurance. She could almost see Vitus rubbing Felix’s hand as he spoke. She let herself return to her focus. The goal of the house that they could all live in. One with rooms that were both their size and Felix’s. Where he wouldn’t be made to feel out of place and neither would they.

“Conjura!” she shouted. Her eyes opened, the brilliant red glowing from them always left her a bit concerned. It didn’t matter as the home she conjured pieced together around them. It didn’t take long for it to complete.

She fell back, the spell itself taking all her energy. Usually Vitus caught her, but this time large fingers wrapped around her easily. She looked up, the glow from her eyes casting a strange red on Felix. He looked nervous and excited exactly what she wanted. She couldn’t move though.

“I- are- uh-,” he started and stopped. Vitus’s hands came to rest on her arm.

“Don’t worry. She’s tired. Just like I’m sure you are. We should all get some sleep tonight. Felix, we'll deal with the village tomorrow. You have a home here with us.”

“We need to show him his room Vitus,” she mumbled.

“I doubt you even know where it is, did you put any thought into the layout this time?”

“Yes! Well… a bit more than last time.”

They laughed, but the fingers beneath her tensed. She looked up at Felix, fear still pouring from his face. She had an idea, one that might tip Vitus over the edge. She would offer it anyway, anything for the giant she’d already taken in as her child.

“Felix, do you want me to stay with you tonight?” she asked. Vitus tightened his hold on her arm, but it wasn’t the warning kind of grip. She knew when he thought she’d gone too far.

“We can both stay with you if you want,” he said.

Felix didn’t actually say anything. He just wrapped his fingers around them both and pulled them close. A young child that had been on his own didn’t need to speak when the offer was right there. He stood and looked around a bit before seeming to decide he just wanted to sleep where he was. He curled up on his side, Dabria and Vitus held against his chest.

“Is… is this ok?” he whispered.

“It’s fine Felix, get some sleep. We’ll be here in the morning,” she said.

It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep. The hands around them loosened, letting both Dabria and Vitus get more comfortable. They sat next to Felix’s chest, the calm breaths something Dabria was happy to hear. Vitus had his arms around her, but both their heads were against Felix.

“You went out and adopted a giant child tonight,” he whispered with a laugh.

“It wasn’t my plan, but yes I did,” she sighed. A smile wide enough to split her face in two as one of Felix’s hands moved to cover them in his sleep.

“I can’t say much, I saw him and knew if you hadn’t I would have.”

“You know, I was a little worried this time I might have gone too far. It’s not like you grew up with a giant next door like I did.”

“Well, I can’t really leave a kid all on his own. Size be damned. We’re leaving if they argue tomorrow.” She wrapped her arms around Vitus and squeezed.

“You’re the best man I could have married.”

“You’re the best witch I could have met. Get some rest, you’ll be busy with him tomorrow while I deal with the town.”

“Vitus… you really are the best.” He pulled her closer, she let her eyes fall closed. “Why were you still up? I know you usually  try to be awake, but it’s pretty close to dawn. You normally fall asleep around now, even with the lights on.”

“I was waiting to tell you I finished the test for why you’ve been so tired. Felix will have a little sibling within a year.”

Dabria’s eyes snapped open. She knew he was running one of those tests he did on her blood, but she didn’t know it would turn into that. Her heart raced as ideas flooded her mind. All the things their family could do, not a single one missing their new giant son. She fell asleep dreaming of the child they’d add to this family they just formed.

In the morning she was woken by loud banging at their door. She didn’t even know how close it was. Felix’s hands around her tightened, it wasn’t a dream. She did notice that Vitus wasn’t there. She squirmed out of the nervous giant’s hand to look at him, golden eyes filled with fear.

“She did it again, didn't she?” It was one of the gossiping villagers. “She brought that monster here. We’ve ignored what she is, but this is too far.”

She rested a hand on Felix’s fingers, digging them into his skin. They weren’t getting chased out. Even if the village didn’t like them, she’d go to where she found him and they’d live there.

“Enough!” Vitus’s voice echoed in the now giant sized home. “If you intend to try to chase our son out of here you’ll be losing both of us as well. I’ll happily trust him over all of you with how you treated my wife when we arrived. Make your choices wisely.”

The door slammed, another echo that settled in the silence. Tears splashed nearby. Felix started shaking. Vitus walked in and she could see how angry he was. Just how many times had that happened already? She always slept heavily after such a big spell. A house for a fully grown giant was no easy feat, even for her. 

Vitus walked right up to Felix and held a hand up to him. The giant child leaned forward, as if it was something they’d done a thousand times. He stopped with his face just a little out of Vitus’s current reach. Vitus didn’t care, he reached out further and stood on the tips of his toes to touch the face of the child they took in during the night.

“Don’t worry Felix, we’re family now. They aren’t going to get us to send you away. We either live here together or we move out of the village together,” Vitus said. 

The hand near her left only to wrap around Vitus. He was pulled up as Felix sat up straight. The child was crying again with the man against his face. Dabria smiled, happy to see Vitus acting just as she did. They were a family. A human, a witch, a giant, and eventually a half witch. They’d be quite the strange group, but all of them would stick together.

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Felix sat outside of the home his human size parents had made so long ago. He didn’t need to go hunting for the village and he had run out of fabric so he was bored. Bored happened a lot for him, but that was partly because of why he ran out of fabric so often.

“Felix!” a child shouted. He looked down at his leg where the fabric his sister had conjured in practice was being used for a slide. He’d moved his leg at some point, knocking down the ladder the kids were using today. “Help us up!”

“What if I don’t want to?” he smirked. It was met with dozens of whines as he fixed the ladder anyway. He set his hand down, quickly gaining a handful of unbelievably tiny humans. It scared him a bit how much trust they had in him. They were so small, he could mess up. It had been like this for years though.

“Felix!” A woman called as she ran up to him. “I need you to watch Cedric for a few hours. Just enough to get laundry done!”

“A-are you sure?” It had never been easy to believe the humans wanted him to hold the youngest of the children. Still the tiny human Cedric, one who could barely walk, was dropped on his palm and the woman ran off.

“Thank you so much! I’ll be back by sunset.”

“Hide me! Hide me!” This voice he knew very well, his sister came running from the house towards his unoccupied hand. She grabbed at his hand to turn it over so he’d lift her from the ground. “Felix please! You have to hide me.”

Felix sighed, but carefully pinched his sister’s sides. It was hard to believe she was only a little over twice the width of his fingers. Still he lifted her up and up and up until he had her meeting his eyes. She looked nervous, he could only imagine what she did this time. She was getting more confident in her magic now. A confidence that used up a lot of materials.

“Del, what did you do this time?” he asked.

“Felix I promise to conjure more of the really fancy fabric tonight if you just hide me. Just drop me in your pocket and pretend I wasn’t here. Please?”

“Delphia Kamia you get back here!” his mother shouted. 

Almost on instinct he slipped his sister into his pocket. He would never let anyone hurt his family, even when it was the rest of his family. His mother came running out of their house with a glare that made him shudder. That caused a number of whines from the slide on his leg. He didn’t hear the ladder fall though.

“Felix, where is your sister?” his mother asked. She set her hands on her hips, her ebony hair was a mess. Felix just shrugged, preferring not to directly lie. “She managed to draw on all the extra catalysts again and even caused a small explosion this time. She’s lucky it was just us inside, you and your father could have been hurt.”

“I don’t think it would have hurt me,” Felix smiled. It was a wry smile, sometimes his mother acted like he wasn’t a giant.

“Don’t belittle magic. The explosions can do a lot of damage when you aren’t a witch. Now where is she?”

“I’m not sure, sorry to say.” His lie had a strong chance to fall flat when the human in question squirmed in his pocket.

“When you see her make sure she knows she’s grounded for the two months it will take me to travel to get more catalysts.” The shout told him and the squirming human in his pocket that their mother knew where she was.

“I can always take you, it should only take a few days then.”

“That’s right I do have a giant son who would never lie and hide his sister and will happily help me replace what she blew up so he doesn’t also get in trouble.” The glint in her red eyes had him looking away. “I’ll go get packing for the trip then, we’ll leave in a few days.”

Felix watched her walk back inside. Cedric slapped his palm to get his attention, laughing when he looked down. Delphia stopped squirming and the kids continued playing. This life he wound up with was hectic. He just smiled as time passed. Delphia slept in his pocket all day. The woman came for her son when the rest of the children in the village went home. Delphia asked to be let out around then too. She ran back inside, but Felix stayed outside waiting for his dad. 

The white haired man walked home slowly. As soon as he was in reach Felix leaned forward, wrapping his fingers around the tall human. There was no resistance as he lifted his father from the ground and brought him close. He pressed the man to his chest as he stood. Walking towards the home magic had made to fit them all.

“Busy day?” his dad asked. The sarcasm made him chuckle.

“No, just left with the kids while everyone was busy. I don’t know why they keep doing that. I’m the big scary giant,” he said. A part of him never had forgotten the gossip from when his parents first took him in.

“If you could keep your threats maybe they’d stop coming. Everyone who comes to see me talks about how their kids love when you play the big scary giant who won’t help them play.”

“Maybe I’ll just start trapping them in my pocket then.”

“They’d probably love it, I think you’re stuck with them. Just like you're stuck with us.”

Felix didn’t say anything else. He pressed his dad a bit more firmly against his chest. He was stuck with his human sized family. A human, a witch, a half witch and a giant… and he wouldn’t change a thing.

#gt #giant/tiny #giant tiny #g/t #g/t writing #gt writing #gianttiny #gt community #g/t community #gtjuly #gt july 2023 #gt july intimidate #oc: felix #oc: dabria #oc: Vitus #parental gt #gt found family

[chayscribbles]

chayscribbles’ monthly writing update ☆ february 2024

yes, i know, february has an extra day this year, but i'm posting this today bc i won't have time tomorrow lol

☆ STATISTICS.

projects worked on: The Gemini Heist

proudest accomplishment: i... wrote?... i guess??? *can't remember a single thing i did this month for some reason*

books read: Witch King by Martha Wells. i'm ngl, i was lost like 80% of the time, but that might just be a skill issue on my part (it's the kind of book that throws you into the thick of it without holding your hand and listening to the audiobook with the attention span that i have was... probably not the wisest idea lol)

(alhough funnily enough, it's while having this audiobook on in the background that i came up with a lot of my plot thoughts for gemini heist LMAO. either that or while playing zelda.)

☆ GENERAL COMMENTS.

although i did get writing done this month, this update's gonna be short. i don't really have much to say lol

more specific wip-related comments + featured excerpt below.

☆ COMMENTS: THE GEMINI HEIST (draft 0.5)

it's very weird to not be using word count to track my progress anymore. freeing, but weird. i have no concept of how much i've actually done for this wip this month.

i do know i've figured out a bit more stuff about the heist and the lore. i had a big plot brainstorming session and untangled a few scenes. while i know what direction i want the story to head, i still don't know how any of this gets resolved, tho.

and i wrote out a few important scenes. that's progress, right?

☆ FEATURED EXCERPT.

i've been writing so chaotically out of order based on whatever scene i feel most inspired for in the moment that i,,, honestly can't remember what i've written this month vs what i had already written before 🥲 here's a scene that i THINK i wrote in february. Leo and Illiana might be my new favourite dynamic. (for context, Illiana is posing as her identical twin at a party, and Leo is posing as a guest. they came in separately.)

With the bodyguards tailing her the entire way, Illiana slowly made her way towards [Leo]. She tolerated a few brief exchanges with other guests she crossed paths with to appear natural, then, once she was close enough, she slipped the extra comm out of the pocket concealed in her skirt. She made a show of bending down to pick up something, then strode towards Leo. “Excuse me,” she said as she approached. “I believe you dropped your earring.” Leo turned to her, smile strained underneath her veil. “Oh, thank you,” she said, holding out her hand. Illiana placed the comm into her palm, taking care to hide it from the guards. As Leo angled her head away to slip it into her ear, she added, “I must say, your Holiness, this is quite a lovely party.” “Why, thank you, Miss…” She faltered, realizing she didn’t know Leo’s alias. “I’m sorry, I don’t believe I’m familiar with you.” “I’m a business leader from Tharekkan,” Leo said, pressing her palms together and giving Illiana a slight bow with her head. “It’s an honour to be here.” Illiana was surprised that Leo, with all her meticulous planning, didn’t have a fake name ready, and now she was curious. “How may I address you?” Leo’s already tense smile tightened even more. “‘Miss’ is fine,” she replied, practically through clenched teeth.  “No, I meant, your na—” “I’ve been told much about how lovely Fiolsby is, right before the winter,” Leo cut off, an unnatural segue back to the script they had practiced. “But I haven’t had the time to properly see the city.” Now Illiana just had to pry Leo's fake name out of her. “Really? That’s a shame. You know, the gardens offer a wonderful view of the city. Would you like to see, Miss…?” She let her sentence trail off, watching Leo expectantly. “If it’s not too much trouble, I would love that,” Leo replied, to Illiana’s annoyance.

☆ TAGLISTS. let me know if you want to be added/removed to any of them.

general taglist:

@dgwriteblr @the-orangeauthor @onomatopiya @quilloftheclouds @ashen-crest @writeblrfantasy @celestepens @stardustspiral @pepperdee @extra-magichours @avi-why @lefttigerobservation @chazzawrites @bardolatrycore @innocentlymacabre @subtlefires

gemini heist taglist:

@florraisons @akindofmagictoo @cream-and-tea @memento-morri-writes @antique-symbolism @rose-bookblood @afoolandathief @pepperdee @avi-why @zonnemaagd @chazzawrites @analogued @enchanted-lightning-aes @innocentlymacabre @kahvilahuhut @celestepens @cilly-the-writer @extra-magichours @onomatopiya @outpost51 @planets-and-prose

#chayscribbles writing update #wip gemini heist

[prongsmydeer]

Ayesha Liveblogs Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story

The opening credits are beautiful, I'll give them that

"I know that no one who looks like you or me has ever married one of these people, ever." Bridgerton: Now Even More Suspicious When It Comes to Depictions of Race

Even permitting for the thirteen children, Queen Charlotte seems pretty neutral about her granddaughter's [redacted] LOL

"Very brown. Thoughts?" Me walking into parties in high school

Not Lady Danbury's Crypt Keeper-ass husband removing his teeth to sleep

"Lord Danbury. Imagine." [Tensely] "I am imagining." Lady Danbury knows that a title needs an heir

"You may be too beautiful to marry me. People will talk, given that I am a troll." George is handsome to the point of distraction

"Either way, the choice is entirely up to her." I know it's like bare minimum but I do appreciate George reinforcing Charlotte's autonomy in the matter of their marriage

Charlotte changing outfits is fun for two reasons 1) That she is showing that she will be her own woman as Queen and 2) The superstition around seeing the bride in her dress before the wedding

Honestly, honestly. Get u a man who will bequeath u an investment property and give u ur space whenever you want it.

"Do we not spend this night together? My governness said that is what happens on our wedding night." [Pregnant pause] "Fine. I shall stay." What is George's deal? Surely even the pretense of consummation is necessary?

George from Bridgerton 🤝Derek from Swan Princes: How to Offend Women in Five Syllables or Less

Charlotte does not mince words for her Virgin and Whore Adult Children:

"Your father and I made 15 royal babies all by ourselves. I do not see why the whole lot of you cannot make just one." Mad props for surviving 15 rounds of childbirth in Georgian England

Say what you will about Charlotte's currently loveless marriage, at least she's eating good food

HAHAHAH we finally get gay characters in this show and it's Five Steps Behind Brimsley and There's Nothing Wrong With His Bits Other Guy

Justice for Benedict and Eloise, who are bisexual and lesbian to meeee

"I do not know a single soul here except for you. I'm completely alone, and you prefer the sky to me." Even if George refuses to be a husband to Charlotte, he can at least be a friend

"What if he puts another one of his gigantic babies inside me?" Am I to take this as Lady Danbury has living children or nah

George sending Charlotte a dog is another green flag

Thank God for Lady Danbury, no one will ever tell the Bridgerton women what sex is when they ought to

"But it can be such a pleasure." "Or it can be a painful, lifelong sentence." Danbury vs. Bridgerton: Marriage dichotomy edition

"I do not like the part where my head hits the wall over and over again. Is there a way to avoid that?" "Yes, there is a way to avoid that." George said: I want to be on bottom 🥰

George said: I am about to ruin the energy of our whole marriage in less than a minute

Is the King's tremor meant to represent his already being in the midst of his disease? :((

"Mother was going on and on to all the ladies at tea that their love means we now live in an unnatural society." Violet's mum said: The energy of this show isn't rank enough, time to be racist

Violet's dad calling her both Beauty and Brains as she asks questions 💝I love him

"So they are exactly like us. Better in some cases considering that several of them are from royal families of their own, and have much more money than we do." Violet said: I'm an ally

HAHAHAH George and Charlotte working out their issues in classic Bridgerton style, via sex montage

"It would be difficult for you to hear about the Queen being with child long after the fact, would it not?" Lady Danbury said: I will go to ANY length to avoid spending time with my husband (fair)

"I planned some correspondence that I need to write, so the time was useful." Agatha, Master of Dissassociation

Not Mama Ledger dissing the Tween Mozart LMAO

"I told you that I enjoy science. Part of that science is agriculture. I enjoy farming." "So King George is... Farmer George?" There's the Farmer George I've heard so much about

"Why do you not understand that you hold our fates in your hands?" Something something the distance from the nobility to the class it rules something something labour from women of colour (and specifically Black women) something something Bridgerton bringing up the outward dynamics of racial inequity while refusing to interrogate the fact Nearly Every Single Black Female Character of Significance AND Simon Has Had Their Reproductive Autonomy Taken Away (Simon's mother, Marina, Lady Danbury, Queen Charlotte)

Shout-out Brimsley and NWWHB (Nothing Wrong With His Bits) for being my emotional support background couple

"You can be a person with me." George and Charlotte uniting over their common understanding of their duty to support the nation ❤️

Lady Danbury and Lord Ledger ending racism one dance at a time

"Thank you." "You never have to thank me. We are a team." This line would've absolutely KILLED IT had it not been for the fact that Voltron already used this line in 2018, in a more emotionally substantive context (Shout-out my boy Shiro)

Not Lady Danbury and her homie Coral giggling and hugging because Lord Danbury is deceased (good for them)

Flhkfjhfkjhf Lady Danbury's 'Sorry I offended you about your dead husband, mine sucked,' tea is a social event on its own

"I was in the sky, but now I am going inside. Into Buckingham House." Charlotte immediately understanding that she needs to work within George's delusions :(

"Tell me, what would the people prefer: A royal baby, or cheap bread?" These principles do make for a good ruler, it is a shame about The Illness

"You command an entire kingdom. You can command yourself." George said: Friendship ended with early-onset neurological dysfunction, now personal affirmations are my best friend

(I really hope someone has done fanart from this ep with George and that meme 'I am no longer mentally ill')

Tfjfjhfjfhf imagine if instead of finding me the right meds for my nerve pain, my doctor just slapped me in the face and told me to get a hold of myself. Georgian England Medicine do be rough

"Her perfection is matched only by my deformity." Fuck. I did not anticipate how deeply Farmer George's story would hit from a place of like. Self-imposed exclusion due to living in a broken body. But damn

Did it really take until four episodes in for NWWHB aka the King's Man aka Brimsley's boyfriend aka Reynolds to get a name?

I am enjoying the retrospective on all of these events from George's side of things

"And just like an animal, I will break you." I no longer enjoy the retrospective on George's side of things

It really is the Ultimate Gesture that he's getting tortured so he can get be well enough to know his wife

If nothing else, the King has a solid homie in Reynolds

Really fair of Charlotte to be upset to be uninformed of what George was going through, but brutal that he's going back to Doctor Mon(ster)ro

"Do you suppose the Queen ever seeks...?" Omg I wouldn't expect Violet to be so saucy

Why are all the middle-aged women rising from their beds in the night is this going to be like that Glee song where everyone simultaneously discovers masturbation

"Loneliness is a battle even queens must fight for themselves." Penelope Featherington, somewhere: I gotta make fun of the Queen for having a mentally-ill husband

I'm pretty sure this captioning is incorrect, and what George is saying is, "Doctor! Doctor!" and not "Torture! Torture!" But both are accurate I suppose

Hahahaha not to add insult to injury for Violet, but Lady Danbury made eye contact with Violet's dad at Lord Danbury's funeral like she was thinking he was beekeeping age

"It's not surprising you should mourn him, he was your husband." You don't have to like someone to feel weird that they're dead

"I was three when my parents promised me. When a deal was struck. Three years old. So, I was raised to be his wife." Agatha's parents said have you heard of grooming? We have brought it down to a science

The People of Colour in Nobility raise fair points about succession

"I am sorry to report that she remains alive and well, Your Majesty." Brimsley said treason is allowed if it's funny

"Paint her skin lighter. Pale. His Majesty wants her to glow." 70% of fanart for any given fandom LMAO (also shout-out to the real world contention around images of Queen Charlotte)

"I will see you here tomorrow. Same time. You will wear better shoes. We can ramble together." I KNEWWWW there was some eye contact going on [Agatha as Animatronic Fox voice] I'm gonna fuck your dad, Violet

"Your garden is in bloom." "It is blooming out of control." It IS going to be like that scene from Glee

"Georgie, be a good boy and approve your brothers' marriages." "...I approve." The Princes forgot that there is one power that trumps even the monarchy: Being a mama's boy

"Your body is not your own." Welcome 2 having a uterus

At least Aldophus would be willing to intervene if his sister were in physical danger

"Rambles are there." "Rambles are there." "I am there." This would be so romantic if it were not directed at her future friend's dad LMAO

Agatha, somewhere in the present: My garden bloomed for your father once, Violet

"The hard part is done," said Princess Augusta, as if being married to a person losing grip on themselves for the remainder of their life is not a hard part

There is something that feels like empathy about Augusta saying that Charlotte never has to see her husband again, even if it's immediately followed by the clarification they could need another heir

Brimsley reaching out to Charlotte but unable to reach her due to Georgian social graces

I do feel for Reynolds, in his being caught and unable to do anything to help his partner or his friend/King

It is funny that we have not once seen Agatha interact with her children, given how family oriented the main plot of the show is. Historically accurate, mayhaps, but omg

"What do any of the women of the ton know of true friendship?" Agatha said: FRIENDSHIP IS FOR MEN AND THE POOR

"We are untold stories. And yesterday, you told me something of your story. And I, thank you." "You are most welcome." I love Lady Bridgerton and Lady Danbury's friendship ❤️

"It did not bloom until after he was gone." With your dad, Violet!

"I want to be gardened as much as possible." Violet said: Now that I have found my libido, I am open for business

Dominic Danbury is sooo cute I want a million more scenes of the world's tiniest noble:

I do love how they give specific context to what royal connections the Danbury family has in Sierra Leone, rather than leaving their noble connections in ambiguity

I know Charlotte's the queen but damn imagine having someone who has just stationed their whole business in your drawing room before you got home

"Where will Your Majesty go?" "Why, I have come here." Charlotte said: Be a pal and commit treason with me, Agatha

Agatha and Charlotte deciding to start their friendship sincerely 💗I love women

"I'm afraid." "Afraid of what?" "That I will not be able to love her." "Love is not a thing one is able or not able to do based on some magic. Some chemistry. That is for plays. Love is determination. Love is a choice one makes." Charlotte said: Love is companionship, William

"And these youthful fits shall become mere embarrassing memories." 1) Adolphus, you say this with the slightest bit of context as to why Charlotte left and 2) Not a good time to use the word 'fits,' it's a sensitive topic

"And I am not... coming inside." Finally the prophecy of dad fucking is fulfilled

Charlotte said: That's enough of this medical malpractice

You know, I didn't really keep a good count of Agatha's kids. Are there four already or does she potentially give birth to her homie's half-sibling LMAO

Also: It is deeply weird that Papa Ledger's method of hitting on people is the birthday hat he also makes for his daughter

Violet has now found the birthday hat; to be expected but unfortunate for all involved. Does she think it was her husband or does she know it was her dad?

"I see them. Do you not?" Brimsley is ride or die for Charlotte 4ever

"I love you. From the mo... from the moment I saw you trying to go over the garden wall, I have loved you desperately. I cannot breathe when you are not near. I love you Charlotte. My heart calls your name. I wanted to tell you. I wanted you to know." COMMUNICATION

I love the double meaning in the last two lines, because it bridges right into him telling her about his condition so it's both "I wanted to tell you (that I love you)," and "I wanted to tell you (that I have been bearing this)."

"Perhaps one day [Violet] will have an unimpeachable reputation. Just like yours." I think this is how Papa Ledger has chosen to break up with Agatha

"I do not remember names. I am female." Me when I lie

"You do not know us. Any of us. You do not learn about us. You do not care for what we care for." Generational trauma: Royal edition

"They will be together, have a marriage, grow old as one. We would serve them together." "A lifetime." Gay marriage: Royal aide edition

"Losing a husband is... inconvenient." Augusta said: Sorrows, sorrows, prayers

"I will not engage with the princess. I've promised the Queen friendship." Agatha said: Loyal homies before royal homies

"Brimsley. Have you any family? Did you never marry?" Incredible that after approximately 30 years, Charlotte has not once asked Brimsley about his personal life. Oh, rich people

Lady Danbury is too honourable to ask Charlotte for help, even though she needs help with title succession :(

"I have loved and been loved. And that is all I shall say." Lady Danbury said: I will never admit to sleeping with your dad, Violet

"There is womanly work afoot." HAHAHA me when I want a man to leave

Were I Charlotte, I would not take kindly to the horse comparison, no matter how helpful it was

"And over the years, I learned I need not be content to surrender myself to the uselessness of female pursuits. Instead, I secured my son as King." Augusta said: Crying is for women, we are politicians

You know, all this talk of Parliament has suddenly reminded me how anachronistic George's haircut is. I wonder if he will finally put on a wig

"You have been an admirable adversary thus far. Our battles bring me satisfaction. So this, will not do. You are not allowed to come here and sob. You may not quit. Cover your bruises and endure. Do not lose control of your fate, Agatha." HAHAHAHA I can't believe Augusta is giving Agatha a pep talk and a shot of alcohol mid-title negotiation. That's mentorship

"I am sorry." Is George hiding under the bed? LMAO

Update from ten seconds later: He is

Sometimes, love is not about who will pull you out from beneath the bed, but who will get under the bed with you

"Not a full me. Not a full marriage. Only half. Half a man. Half a king. half a life." "If what we have is half, then we shall make it the very best half." 💘Oh Charlotte

I know Agatha doesn't NEED to marry a Prince, but I think it'd be fun if she did

"I will not say words with hearts and flowers, because I know you are not a hearts and flowers woman. But there is something here. Between us. I believe we could be happy together." Yet another marriage of companionship about to be tossed over for passion. Why does no one on this show what to marry someone who simply wants to provide them a life of kindness!!! (I know in Agatha's case, Lord Ledger is also kind, but not kind enough not to cheat on his wife and introduce his daughter to his mistress. Soooooo)

Why do they cut to the back-and-forth between invitation and sex like it is necessary preparation for the ball hahahhaa

George is representing a very real mental health experience of when you spend a long time in your house and then you experience like mild agoraphobia when you have to be outside again

Literally no one at this ball has hair like George LMAO. But why am I seeking anything historical in the Shonda Rhimes Cinematic Universe:

"I cannot marry you, but only because I cannot marry anyone." I respect this position if it's coming from a point of independence rather than for a different man. I love her regaining agency over the direction of her life!

HOWEVER. HOWEVER. AGATHA. GIRL. YOU HAVE NO INCOME. WILD OF YOU TO DENY ALL SAFETY NETS FOR YOUR SURVIVAL

"You make him happy. Thank you, your Majesty." This is the closest thing to a compliment Charlotte will ever receive from her mother-in-law

This show is pretty bittersweet, given all that we know becomes of the Queen and King in the future

Shout-out to Brimsley and Reynold's relationship for being the saving grace of this show

Hahahaha Charlotte finally gets her one (1) legitimate grandchild after 50 ones that she does not care to know about

"I only did not wish to place my burdens on top of your own." Agatha 💞

"I suggest your shift your fear into faith and come to us with your concerns directly. To do otherwise would suggest we are incapable of addressing them." Charlotte is such a good Queen

Charlotte said: Your mum WAS right about my child-bearing hips!

"I believe you should leave the hats where they are. They are lovely. As you say, cheerful." This is as close as Lady Danbury will come to acknowledging the dad-fucking

GEORGE NOW BEING THE ONE TO JOIN CHARLOTTE UNDER THE BED. THEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

"Your line will live on." "Our line." "Our line." Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

The splicing between the young version of George and Charlotte and their younger selves. This is really getting to my heart.

"You did not go over the wall." "No George, I did not go over the wall." I'M GOING TO CRY, THIS IS MY FAVOURITE OF THE BRIDGERTON SEASONS 😭😭😭 ROMANCE!!

#ayesha says things #liveblogging #ayesha liveblogs bridgerton #ayesha liveblogs queen charlotte #bridgerton spin-off spoilers #bridgerton #qcabs

[astronnova]

no on god if you feel like it i wanna hear your issues with s4 bc i was also kinda iffy on it... i thought that was just me tbh LMAO

OKAY... haha im glad its not just me

lego monkie kid has this overarching theme of "the world is what you make of it / anyone can be a hero, make the most of your abilities / with the support of your friends and belief in yourself, you can do anything". at least, that's the narrative i was getting.

Lady Bone Demon represented the idea that fate is unchangeable and that means you should stop trying to "make a difference/change". she, ironically, claims herself has a harbinger of "destiny" and attempts to force this viewpoint on the world. she tries to change the world to fit her image. her ice powers could be symbolic of how her mindset is meant to freeze others into place and keep them from taking action against her.

so, in contrast, MK is meant to represent the opposite, aka the overarching narrative theme. when MK defeats her, he even says that "the perfect world is what you make of it, so as long as i have my friends by my side, the world is perfect!". it's a pretty clear indication of what the show is trying to get across to the audience.

MK's backstory is unknown throughout s1-3. we just have the general of Pigsy and Tang being important role models in his life and the idea that he recently changed his name/nickname to be MK, and that originally he had a name that was "really a mouthful". not much is really needed for a hero like MK to work in a story like this. honestly? the more boring the character's original life, the better. it hammers home the idea that anyone can be a hero.

we're never fully told why Wukong picked MK as his successor, but one can assume it's because of Wukong's "i've been kinda watchin' you" comments that Wukong has studied MK and deemed him suitable. i know i, along with a couple others, assumed it's because MK was "worthy". even the staff seems to allow those who are "worthy" to lift it, proven by when MK loses the ability in the fight against Macaque in s1. he says "i can't ... i'm not strong enough". i'm gonna quickly mention that this means the Monkey King Powers (tm) are rooted in believing in yourself, which is fitting since Wukong was an allegory for the power of the mind. anyway. the entire season MK's powers are referred to as Monkey King Powers by the cast and himself. there's even that glowy, golden power stone thing that Macaque removes from MK, effectively "taking his powers". that confirms the idea that power can be shared, meaning Wukong most likely just quietly gave his powers to MK when he lifted the staff. this, along with the fact that Wukong could shut off MK's powers kind of proves the idea that Wukong gave MK the powers in the first place. if that wasn't true, then somebody in MK's life, or himself, would have noticed something being off.

TL;DR, s1-3 MK started as a regular delivery boy who was given Monkey King's powers, and he represents the idea that anyone can become a hero and that you just need to believe in yourself and your friends.

now that the set up is outta the way, here's my gripes with season 4 lol

MK is given a backstory that, in a way, proves Lady Bone Demon right: destiny is unchangeable. he is another stone monkey, born of an egg similar (or originating from) Wukong's stone egg. we don't ... really know why? there's a lot of holes in this, like

how did MK go all the way from the mountain top to Pigsy's noodles? why to Pigsy's of all places?

if MK is a stone monkey, why does he take on a human form from birth?

if the powers he possess are all innate and not given, why has he never noticed/used them before? did he just ... not use them? even on accident? (that feels like lazy writing.)

it feels kind of obvious, at least to me?, that this backstory is... made up for this and future seasons. it doesn't really apply to s1-3 MK. it's retconned in. which, okay, fine, it's a kids show made to sell toys like ninjago, of course they're going to start adding random stuff in, they gotta sell those toys. the kids need a cool action show to get them interested in them toys. but my issues stems from the fact that the message of the show has changed.

MK is no longer the everyman underdog hero for kids to look up to, he was specifically born to be an all-powerful stone monkey. this isn't the story of a normal guy becoming a hero, it's the story of an all powerful being just... realizing they're all powerful. he was destined to be this way. it feels almost negative, if ya catch my drift. this, along with the retcons (???) to the rest of the cast, just leaves a weird taste in my mouth.

the others, Pigsy, Tang, Sandy, and Mei, are no longer the reincarnations of the pilgrims, but are now the descendants. mei is an exception, since she was always Ao Lie's 1000x great grand daughter, but the others? they were always thought of as reincarnations. the descendant thing feels like a quick retcon. for what? i have no idea. the only thing i can think of is the narrative question for the heroes of "the sins of the father" type deal, where they have to prove that they are better people than their ancestors. this... also applies to MK, in an odd way? the show has made comments of how Wukong regrets many things in his life and that no one has let him forget about his mistakes, something that could tie into the narrative idea of The Next Generation (tm) being better than the old guys. he even tells MK that he's done so much more for the world than Wukong ever did himself. this is weird, because MK and Wukong are not related. at least in a direct descendant kind of way (such as father -> son confirmed by writer/producer, David Breen. as for sibling relationship? god i hope not.) although MK says in s4, and Sandy in s3, that this is Just A Theory that they're descendants/reincarnations, it's still pretty blatantly showed that it's true.

my issue is that this feels like character assignation, of the old pilgrims and of our current cast. issues that characters didnt really have (mei's "anger", for example) are being put into the series to give them some sort of obstacle to overcome, even though there's plenty organic obstacles in the narrative. and damn, poor mk. i guess im just mourning the loss of our regular ass dude who has been exchanged for a..... uh..... fanfic-like backstory? i know i know that's a "cringe" remark to make, but it's the only analogy i can think of at the moment. imagine pitching this

okay, so our main character, get this, is gonna be a stone monkey JUST like the monkey king. AND he's gonna have all the monkey king's powers. he'll be born from the same stone, too. it's like he's another wukong but for the kids!

i'm exaggerating, but still. like .. ???

now, not everything was bad or something i didnt like! i loved the conflict azure presented, and i love MK grappling with the idea of "everything being his fault". it reflects wukong's problems in a cool way (now if they'd EXPLORE THAT!!!). azure brings up a pretty good point and one i did NOT thing they would ever do: the idea that the celestials are corrupt and self serving. azure has a point here, and the conflict is pretty damn cool. i just kinda wish the heroes' narrative would also be a response to this conflict? like s1-3. but w/e i guess

i kinda expected a change in direction since the director and some writing staff were changed from s1-3 to this season. but uhhhh not like this </3

now!!!!! i am not completely set in stone with this current idea of lego monkie kid because there's a season 5 on it's way. the story will continue, and i assume we will get our closure on the azure lion arc. im kinda worried about how that closure will happen but uhhh future us problem. MK is also at the height of his darkest hour/self doubt by the end of this season, so hopefully s5 will address this and explore the solution. what narrative solution r they gonna present??????? no fuckin clue theres like no hints i hae no idea where they're going with this. foreshadowing? never met her.

(also, side tangent, there is no way that this was Planned From The Beginning)

#critical . txt #🐒 critical watches the kid monkie show #my bad for the essay. did not mean it chief #i just got ahead of myself #its jsut a lot of things in this show are left unconcluded or things are being thrust into the spotlight. #like. macaque. his advice to MK wasnt even that good i was sitting here like ??? is this the message? what does that even mean #macaque was high when he bullied mk into playing his stupid rip off game thats my conclusion

[akookminsupporter]

yk i used to have an old frnd who i was very close to. like really. we used to talk all the time even though we live miles away and haven't met in like 7+ years. but we always got along. she had a really wide and kind of a different approach to life than other people which i really found admiring. i learned a lot of things from her and i honestly miss her presence sometimes. we don't talk anymore. time got us. there wasn't any fight or anything, we just gradually drifted apart and that's what hurts the most. why am i telling you this? because you remind me of her sometimes. she was strong, opinionated and never feared stating whatever was on her mind. that's a quality i acquired from her. so yeah... reading your messages (replies to the anons) remind me of her sometimes.

hope u do well in life, get everything u want and keep up with your spirit, rosie. i wish you the best in life and i hope everyone around you shows their love in their own way to you. and it's my request to you too, that if you have something to say to someone, say it. you never know when things might change, nothing is forever even the best of relationships (platonic, familial or romantic) end sometimes and you don't know when a stranger might become your new special person. so please don't ever hesitate to show your love to your loved ones. i've lost people and it won't be a lie if i say i barely have friends right now (i'm not forty years old, sigh. just ended high school) but that's fine i still have a lot more things coming. i could meet new people in college and hopefully form new definitions of friendships and relationships. but yes, from whatever i have seen so far, what i am sure of is that nothing is forever. i talk to everyone and you won't believe me people see me as a "happy go lucky girl" which i always like, because why being sad in front of people and making them feel sad when they can't do anything to help you? (in a good way. but i have this serious issue of bottling things up and that lead to anxiety. bad one) i literally have these thick walls because of how scared i am of forming bonds just for the fear of losing them. sigh. i just told you nothing is forever but i, myself have a hard time accepting that. easier said than done, isn't it? lol anyway a lot of sentimental and philosophical stuff have been said. geez i might cringe later at myself if you post this. nvm, it's so good that i found your blog, found bts, found armys, and found uh idk everything? yeah, life could be depressing but i try to smile it off because why not?

a frnd of mine was saying she's going to kill herself and i swear i've heard that lot more times from different people. two kids (15 year olds) commited suicide in the last two months where i live. and i was crying in the bathroom because idk who might be next. and it scares me yk what if it's me next? or in future months or years later maybe if i can't smile anymore? it's so disturbing, sigh. and i hate when people joke and say 'i'm gonna kill myself' at the slightest discomfort in life. at least once, just for a second i want them to think of thousands of those people who are surviving under constant fear of hurting themselves for real, who are actually struggling to keep themselves alive, to fight back life harder than it comes for them, and those who want someone to help them out of vicious circle of depression, anxiety and other similar problems they're caught in. i don't like people who make mental health issues look 'aesthetic'. hope they grow up to know better soon.

god i need to learn how to shut up. sorry this long. i love your blog, please don't ever shut this down. ilysm, hope you stay healthy and live your best life. also, again i'm sorry if my message is too depressing. i started off only to tell you that you remind me of my (ex) best friend lol.

Hi, anon! How are you?

I hope this doesn't sound disrespectful but I was a bit surprised when I read that you recently finished high school. There is experience in your words, experience that is usually gained over the years, with mistakes and frustrations but also joys. You are wise beyond your years, anon. That was nice to see. Although I keep in mind that at no point did you mention your age, assuming you're a teenager is perhaps a bit bold of me.

I think I've said it all day but thank you for the nice opinion you have of me. Thank you for the way you think of me. Thank you for somehow telling me that my sincerity is perceived by all of you. I'm sorry that you and your former friend have drifted apart. Life is funny like that sometimes. Sometimes people come into our lives to teach us something but not to stay. And in itself, that is also a life lesson.

In part, you remind me of me but unlike you, I have never had such positive thoughts about my future. About other people's? Of course, I have, but not about mine, I guess in that respect I like to preach but I don't apply what I preach.

Thanks for the advice and good wishes. You are a special person anon. Try not to change. Always try not to let life and all its tribulations ruin your way of thinking. Maybe try to be a little more positive about yourself. Trusting someone else people say is a rewarding thing to do, I need to work on that too, maybe we can do it together. I sincerely hope that people come into your life who bring something to you instead of taking something away from you. I hope that people come into your life with whom you can form sincere, honest and lasting relationships. You sound like the kind of friend I would like to have. That I often need to have.

I wish you nothing but the best anon, thank you for your kind words. I promise I won't forget what you said to me.

GRACIAS!!

[bookofmirth]

If Gwyn and Azriel do end up together how do you think their relationship will be built up? I definitely see them going from friends to lovers. In ACOSF, there here has not been any interactions between Az & Elain (that we know of) since solstice. Bryce falls into Prythian and I’m sure that took place a few months after ACOSF. In the upcoming CC book, I hope/think we get small (nothing too big since this is about Bryce) glimpses of Gwynriel, like his shadows wrapping around her wrist or trailing after her. I think Gwyn will try to help Bryce go back to her world since she works with Merrill who is researching other worlds. I’m worried/nervous how Gwynriel will play out and be built. If they do get together, I just hope Azriel sorts out his issues first. He doesn’t have to be completely healed, it’s fine, but he needs to work on his self worth issues and needs to acknowledge that he self sabotages. No one can fix that except for himself. Also, how do you think the whole situation with Elain/Azriel will be played out? I believe after CC3, we will have Az’s book and I’m thinking maybe he’ll acknowledge that it was a mistake and he only did it out of jealousy (since his brothers have mates) and not because he has genuine romantic feelings for her. I like that even though Azriel did save/rescue Gwyn, he didn’t immediately develop a possessive/romantic attachment to her. I’m sorry for the long ask! (Ps, do you think Azriel has a hero complex? That he needs to save everybody? This could stem from his childhood with his mother.)

For sure friends to lovers. They already know one another and regularly interact. In this post I mentioned how I think they will continue to work together, and I see it leading to some competitiveness and tension between them, because I think they will have the same goals (IE stop the bad guys) but the Valkyries will have newer, perhaps more progressive ways of doing so, while the Illyrians have an established way of working. I don't ship it 100% because broody sad boys are not my thing (anymore lol) but I can totally see Az and Gwyn having this teasing, challenging camaraderie with one another!

Definitely agree that I hope he gets his issues sorted first! I think talking to Mor will be a much bigger necessity than talking to Elain. Like you pointed out, he and Elain haven't interacted since Solstice (that we know of) so I honestly don't think it will be a big deal that he needs to address. But he has been holding out some sort of unrealistic hope for Mor for his whole life. So yes, I agree that he will admit with Elain he acted out of jealousy (for mating bonds, for what Rhys and Cassian have, not because he wants her in particular), but that will be it. With Mor, it's a much longer, more important conversation.

And yeah, I do think he needs to save women, because of his mom! I know I've talked about it before but I can't be bothered to search for it, so-

Examples are in acofas where he gets upset at dinner and Rhys explains to Feyre that it's because of the way that his mother was treated, the fact that he holds onto this anger about what happened to Mor, he has rescued Feyre, Gwyn, Elain, Briar... Who knows how many other women. I think that's partly why he rushes into danger, but I think it's combined with the fact that he feels deeply insecure about his place in the IC - he was tortured by his brothers, in what world is it okay or sane for him to torture other people as part of his job??? That's where his insecurity comes in, IMO. He does that because he feels like he doesn't have anything else to give, and he needs to earn his place. That's how I interpret it, at least. I mean, there really isn't any other reason for him to put that burden on himself, unless he feels like he deserves it. People have pointed out that Rhys could easily break into people's minds for information, so Az torturing people doesn't make sense.

This is also why I think he gets so angry at being told he can't/shouldn't do things that he thinks will be helpful to the IC (e.g. when Rhys and Feyre tell him he can't spy on Briallyn, when Nesta tells him he'll die if he tries to get Elain back from Hybern). If he doesn't have these things - the rescuing and the torturing for the greater good - then how else is he proving that he belongs?

#azriel #acotar #acosf #gwynriel #ask #anon

[drghostwrite]

hey ! could you please write a bree van de kamp x reader fic set sometime during season 2 when bree was struggling with drinking, andrew, her mental health etc etc. basically the reader keeps trying to help bree through her stuff and at some point they get in a fight over this because obviously bree doesn’t like people seeing through her/seeing her vulnerable. during the fight bree angrily asks soemthing along the lines of “why are you so determined to help me ?” and the reader accidentally yells “because i’m in love with you” this should be followed with angst maybe they don’t talk for a while idk it’s up to you anyway they make up when bree goes to the reader and confesses her love as well then some cute fluffy maybe even slightly nfsw things ensue. I imagine this as a longer fic but write this in any length you prefer I’d just be happy to see this idea come to life hahah

This is going to be interesting lol

Summary: you just read it up above.

*********************************************************************

Bree Van de Kamp, the most successful and put together woman on Wysteria lane, she had the house, the cars, the husband, and the kids, she had the life everyone wanted. Well up until a few weeks ago that is, now she stood eyes glazed over staring out the window from her kitchen, a glass bottle in her hand she lifted it to her lips again and tears started to fall, ahe lowered it, her ring clinking against the side, she looked down at the now forgotten wedding band. she turned it against her finger before setting the bottle down and fully sliding it off, she tuened it over in her fingers, a tear ran down her face not because she lost the man she loved but because she lost eveything. She stuck by his side when they were having marrige issues, he even cheated on her and she stayed with him, but her world started to unravel when news got out, and then the Solice's and their mother that andrew hit and everything with her daughter, it was all to much. Then Rex had the nerve to die and leave her here to deal with it all.

She looked at the ring one more time before throwing it across the room, it hit the wall and fell, then she took the gods on the counter and chucked it as well letting it shattered strong the ring, what she didn’t know was you were at the front door and heard the crash rushing in you found her reaching for the bottle.

“Bree?” You called making her face you.

“Oh god what do you want?”

“What’s going on?”

“why would you care?”

“because I do, I care about you, I came over to check in with you, make sure you’re holding up okay.”

“Holding up okay… that’s one way to put it.”

“Bree…”

“God Y/N what the hell do you want from me,” you had hurt in your eyes but quickly hardened you exterior as this was going to be rough, “I’m not one of your little basket cases you know, I’m fine on my own.” She started to raise her voice but you stayed stone cold.

“says the woman that reeks of alcohol and probably hasn’t showered in two days.”

“You have no right.” She snapped at you.

“No you have no right, I’m only here to help you.”

“Like I said I’m fine on my own, I was before you and I will be after you.”

“so this is what you call fine?”

“fuck you Y/N… you know what this is me being fine, I just lost my husband, and my son is gay what more could I go through… honestly everyone always wants me to be miss perfect but I’m not, and you sending the other three musketeers over to have an “intervention” are you kidding get out of my face.”

“no I won’t leave you and a crew them, I never asked them for anything, I never told them anything.”

“then tell me, why?… why are you so determined to help me.” She said waving her arms voice raised.

“Because Bree Van de Kamp I love you, I’m in love with you!” You yelled before you could think.

She stood there staring at you dumbfounded and you realized what you said, “Y/N”

“No you know what I’m gonna go… we both need some space to cool off so I’m gonna go.” You tuned and left her there just staring at you.

———time jump———

3 days later and you heard a knock at your door, “come on in it’s open!” You yelled out as you were in the living room, working on your laptop, you heard the door open and soft fragile foot steps come towards the room.

“Y/N?” You heard a gentle voice call to you, a smooth voice that’s been tainted with some rasp from crying.

You turned being met with Bree staring back at you the gorgeous redhead that you had accidentally confessed your feelings to and then ran out, way to drop a bomb there Y/N. “Um… Bree hey um…”

“Can we talk?”

“oh yea ignore the laptop, join me.” You folded the computer and quickly placed it in front of you while patting the couch for her to join you. She delicately sat next to you not making eye contact, you gave her the floor to speak and waited.

“Uhumm I’m not sure how to say this so here goes, you know how they say you don’t know you’ve lost something until you need it the most?”

“Yea.”

“We’ll that’s you or at least for me, the other night I finally understood why I was so mad at myself for wearing that stupid ring and it was because it kept me from you, from day one with everything I felt different around you, I always wanted to be with you and had you on my mind… I guess what I’m trying to say is that without knowing it I’ve been in love with you this whole time.” She turned to you with tears in her eyes, you didn’t know what to say so you held out your arms and she leaned into you, you wrapped her in your arms and just held her. When you finally pulled apart she asked you a question that burned in her, “so does this mean I can kiss you now, I’m not sure what to do?”

“baby you can do a lot more than just kiss me.” You smirked as she made contact with your lips, you deepened the kiss, running your hand down her side as you laid her back on the couch she arched into you as your lips collided and bodies pressed into each other. You pulled away laying foreheads together allowing you to catch your breath, “Are you sure about this?”

“Y/N I’m not sure about anything anymore.”

“We don’t have to go any farther we can take it slow.”

“No I’ve taken this… us too slow, I need you.”

you pulled back your eyes gazing into hers and seeing the deep emotions swirling behind those blue orbs, you leaned down kissing her again before getting off and pulling her up with you. “Please, Y/N I…”

“Not here… I’m not going to let the first time I’m with the woman I love be in my living room couch.” There was a silence as her mouth gaped and then closed behind you as she followed you upstairs, you slowly opened the door to your bedroom and she stepped in, she nervously stood inside as you came up behind her and ran your hands over her shoulders and down her sides placing kisses gently she turned in your arms and you continued kissing down her neck. You quickly worked to undress each other until she was in a matching set of bras and panties and you stood in your bra and pants, she slowly undid the button sliding them down to the floor and kneeling before you, she slowly stood before you as you looked down at her, you lifted her chin placing a kiss on her lips as she wrapped her arms around you.

you quickly hoisted her up wrapping her legs around your waist continuing the kisses, you walked over and slowly placed her on the bed. You kissed down her body teasing her by kissing her thighs down the outside and then up the inner thigh. You spent your night like that learning each others bodies and in the morning you awoke.

You thought it was all a dream until you realized a familiar weight draped across your torso red hair splayed across your chest as she rested on you, your breathing in sync your legs tangled together under dark satin sheets cool against the exposed skin.

So it wasn’t all a dream.

#x yn #bree van de kamp #desperate housewives #bree van de kamp x reader #fluff prompts #angst #angst with a happy ending #lynette scavo #Wisteria lane

[silver-ink-iron-words]

G'day, mate!

You may be wonderin' why I'm speaking Strayan

Well, it's coz in my head, Shiloh and Avery are Aussie!

Shiloh coz Sheila, and Avery coz Avery -> Avian -> bird = animals = Australia

Anyhoo, your "Dating" fic is a ripper even if I'm a galah when it comes to it

So I'd be stoked if you'd be a dag and write some more of it

Heaps of sangers 'n chockies for ya (coz I can't find slang for love lol)

Ta! Hoo Roo!

Lmao, a very interesting interpretation

----

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Dating, Part 4

“What are you doing here?”

Shiloh stood on Avery’s front step, a sleeping bag rolled under their arm. “Isn’t it obvious? I’m sleeping over.”

Avery let them in, their movements robotic with shock. Shiloh tossed the sleeping bag on Avery’s couch and then pulled out their laptop.

“Okay, so I’ve downloaded three Disney movies, and that one cartoon you like. Or we could just play stardew valley.”

Avery stared at the files. “All this just because I got freaked out by a horror movie?”

Shiloh’s focus stayed on the screen, as they clicked through their folders. “Well, I don’t have work in the morning. So why not come help a friend? This way, you don’t have to sleep alone.”

“Oh.”

Shiloh finally looked up, lifting their laptop, and offered that smile that Avery wanted to see a thousand more times.

“Alright, let’s get started.”

----

Avery chose, in the end, to watch Shiloh’s favorite movie. It was always fun to see them melt at the cute romantic moments, and punch the air at the action sequences, and pretend that they weren’t crying at that one sappy part at the end.

Avery ended up not watching the movie itself at all.

After that, they played some Smash Bros. Shiloh was good, but Avery was better, and they felt like a god as they pummeled their friend into the ground.

“Alright, best thirteen out of twenty-five,” Shiloh said, readying their controller.

“You honestly think you can get to thirteen wins before me?”

“I know I can. You used up all your luck on your first twelve. Now it’s my time to shine.”

“You know what? Sure. I’ll kick your ass a few more times.”

“Hell yeah.”

As the game started up, and the characters appeared on screen, it occurred to Avery that they had not felt frightened even once since the first moment that Shiloh arrived.

----

“You should take the bed.”

Shiloh unfurled their sleeping bag. “Not a chance.”

Avery glanced down at the thin bag on the hardwood floor. “If you’d called ahead, I would’ve told you that this might be an issue.”

Shiloh shrugged, settling atop it. “I still would’ve come anyways.”

“But won’t you be uncomfortable?”

“I could sleep on a granite slab, Avery.” They grinned as they crawled in. “I know what you’re trying to do, by the way, and I’ll tell you right now that it won’t work. You’re never getting your hands on my precious sleeping bag.”

Avery rolled their eyes, and climbed into their own bed. “Fine. But don’t complain to me when you’re sore tomorrow.”

“That’s what she said.”

Avery blushed, and Shiloh laughed.

Avery looked down at their friend, bright eyes pointed to the ceiling, head in their easygoing hands.

“Will you go on a date with me?”

Shiloh shot their gaze over. They seemed to almost not understand at first, before their face washed with surprise.

They opened their mouth, slowly.

And then they answered.

#cupioromantic #aromantic #writing snippet #aro #aromantic spectrum #a-spec #a spec #hero x civilian #civilian x hero #hey i'm back from my small hiatus #a much asked-for piece is going up tomorrow #so keep an eye out for that #not a prompt

[ronance4everbrainrot]

Stranger things incorrect quote generator (feat. My new AU, +Max and then Max and her Moms)

Pt 8

Murray adopting Robin

Murray: Remember, Robin, don't do anything I wouldn't do.

Robin: I think I crossed that line when I got a date.

(well he just got roasted)

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Robin: *running towards Murray with open arms*

Murray: *moves out of the way*

Robin: Hey, why'd you move?!

Murray: I thought you were going to attack me.

Robin: I was going to hug you!

Murray: Why would you hug me?

Robin: WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU!?

(Honestly the "why would you hug me part" is the best and also sad 😂😭)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: Thank you for not saying "I told you so."

Murray: When you’re as right as I am, you don’t have to say it.

(After Ronance started dating and Robin didn't believe him that Nancy liked her)

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Murray: Do you have any idea what you’re doing?

Robin: Why start now?

(when he tries to help her with the Nancy situatio lol)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: I'd roast you, but my dad says you can't burn trash.

Robin: *slow-mo walks out of the room*

(I just imagine her and Steve doing that old tik tok trend🤣)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin, to Murray: You're not Mario. Lets get something fucking straight, you're Luigi at best.

(I don't even know how to comprehend this)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: When was the last time you cried?

Robin: Uh 15 minutes ago, why??

Murray: really? That recent?

Robin: Yeah *voice crack* is that a issue? *starts crying again*

(if you saw my recent post about this AU, you should have an idea of why she's crying)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: What’s the straightest thing you’ve ever done?

Robin: *sighs*

Robin: I killed a man.

(She finally is in this quote ✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: Pick a card, any card.

Robin: Fine.

Murray: Wait, that's my credit card!

Robin: You said any card.

(Ye Murray, you said any card)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: You believe me?

Robin: Murray, you’re the last good person on this planet. I‘d believe cartoon birds braided your hair this morning.

(This is so funny and wholesome. I love it, but it's also sad 😪)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: If I ever had a child, I imagine they would be a lot like you.

Robin: Aww, thanks—

Murray: Which is probably why I’ve never reproduced.

(Cute but also oof)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: I’ve only had Robin for a day and a half but if anything happened to them I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.

(now this. This is adorable)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: I made tea.

Murray: I don't want tea.

Robin: I didn't make you tea. This is my tea.

Murray: Then why did you tell me?

Robin: It's a conversation starter.

Murray: It's a horrible conversation starter.

Robin: Oh, is it? We're conversing. Checkmate.

(She would do that with everyone so they wouldn't just sit in silence)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: I sort of did something and I need some advice, but I don't want a lot of judgment and criticism.

Murray: And you came to me?

(Well you're her dad now, so yes)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[+Max]

Murray: I hate you sometimes.

Robin: Well according to this picture Max drew of us holding hands that's not true.

Murray: Robin, you drew that.

Robin: It doesn't matter.

(She drew herself with her dad and her daughter 👍)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: Hey, Murray. Why did the chicken cross the road?

Murray: To get to the other side?

Robin: You were supposed to say “I dunno, why?“

Murray: Uh... fine. I don’t know. Why did it cross the road?

Robin: To get to the idiot’s house.

Murray: ...Ok?

Max: Hey, Murray. Knock knock.

Murray: No.

Max: You were supposed to say “who’s there?”

Murray: Fine... let’s get this over with. Who’s there?

Max: The chicken.

Murray:

Max:

Robin:

Murray: Listen here you little shits-

(He secretly loves them, but he hates it just as much)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: How high are you?

Robin: Mm, I don’t know how to say it in feet.

Murray: No, they’re asking what drugs are you on.

Robin: Oh, antidepressants, why?

(She would definitely do that tik tok with that achievement thing and then "I don't take birth control, I'm a lesbian")

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

*Something crashes*

Max: Shoot-

Robin: *running into the room in a panic* WHAT FELL?!

Murray: *walking by the room calmly* What died?

(panicked Mother, Calm Grandpa)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin & Max: *accidentally set the kitchen on fire*

Robin: We need an adult!

Max: Robin, you are an adult!

Robin: We need an adultier adult! Get Murray!

(She is, but she isn't)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: When you work at lush and a customer comes in and bites the soap because they think it’s cheese... this happens way more frequently than you think.

Max: If you stopped literally presenting soap as deli food this wouldn't happen.

Murray: Who goes into a bath store and thinks something covered in glitter is cheese?

Robin: Who goes to the store and just takes a bite from the cheese?

(No, she got a point. I mean if it's a full on block of cheese and not those samples, than what the hell 😂 i mean I'd love to do that but I wouldn't)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: I have the sharpest memory here - name one time I forgot something!

Max: You left me and Robin in a Walmart parking lot at 2am a day ago.

Murray: I did that on purpose, try again.

(Grandpa and Granddaughter bonding✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[Max and her Moms]

Nancy: *yawns*

Robin: Yeah, being that pretty must be tiring.

Nancy: Then you must be exhuasted.

Max: Will you two shut up? Some of us are lonely.

(well then go ask out El or Lucas)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: *gets a text* Oh! It’s Nance.

Max, excitedly: Did they get me the stuff?

Robin: Yeah, they say they got you the clown costume, the power drill, and 12 gallons of blood.

Max: Wow! Where’d they find 12 gallons of fake blood?

Robin: You wanted fake blood?

Max:

Robin: I’ll go call Nance.

(Nancy, a Vampire??👀)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy, about Robin: They're covered in blood again. Why is it they're always covered in blood?

Max: Well, it looks like it's their own blood this time.

(Robin, a werewolf??👀 Who is hurt🥺)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: Nancy, I know you love Robin. I mean, we all do, they’re a very nice person and I respect them immensely.

Max: But I think they might be a fucking idiot.

(What did she do this time)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: Goddamn it, the printer broke while printing out Max's birthday invitations.

Nancy: Well, what are they supposed to say?

Robin: "Max's birthday".

Nancy: So, what do they say instead?

Robin: "Max’s bi".

Nancy:

Nancy: Works out either way.

(It does)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: Hey, Joe said he's coming over this afternoon.

Robin: Cool.

Max: Do you know who Joe is?

Robin: JOE MAMA!

Nancy, not even looking up from their phone: Damn, that backfired.

(It did)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin & Nancy: Surprise! We're having a baby!

Max: What?!

Robin & Nancy: *pull out adoption papers* It's you!

(I've finally got it.. unless it's in one of the others already I don't remember lol)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: They can't make me admit France exists, right? Legally, that's not allowed.

Robin: Sure, if France was REAL I'd say I liked it.

Robin: But who's to say.

Max: I think France isn't real.

Nancy: Max, you've been to France.

Max: And???

(I don't know what going on, but it involves France so I kept it)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: When will Ted himself...finally show up to the talk?

Robin: The final boss.

Nancy: You guys know TEDtalks stands for technology, entertainment, and design talks, right?

Max: I will not let Ted hide behind these lies any longer!

(Honestly, they just make fun of her Dad)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: Someone take me to art museums and make out with me.

Robin: But they said not to touch the masterpieces.

Nancy: Well somebody's got to pin the artwork to the wall.

Max, on a walkie talkie: This is Max, those idiots are fucking around in the East wing again.

(Sometimes she hates her Moms)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: There was a motor close to where I am right now.

Nancy: A motor- a motorcycle?

Max: Oh sorry, a murder.

Robin: That escalated quickly.

(if they had phones and Max texted her Moms in S4 after Chrissy died)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: I will find us a covered wagon and horses.

Max: If you two can manage to not kill each other while I'm gone.

Robin: Oh, please. We're not children.

*Max leaves*

Robin, casually: ...Eat shit and die.

Nancy, also casually: Yes, fuck you.

(enemies to lovers ✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: Guys, I didn’t memorize my lines!

Max: Just use your lack of common sense! Everyone knows the characters in plays are dumb as fuck!

*During the play*

Nancy: Hey! You finally made it! Did you get the donuts?

Robin: W-what’re donuts?

(not that dumb)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: I like to think of myself as a semi responsible adult here.

Max: Nancy is 70% of your impulse control and you know this Robin.

Nancy: I feel like Robin is the more responsible one of us two though.

Robin: We are both 70% of each others' impulse control.

Nancy: Just two lil beasts in pinwheel hats spinning on the merry-go-round at dangerous velocities, holding each other’s hands so the other doesn’t fall off.

(🥺)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy, at Max: Would you like to stay for dinner?

Robin, from the kitchen: Would you like to stay forever!?!

(Ronance lives together and Robin wants to adopt Max)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin, to Max: Look at you! All cute and small! I could just eat you up!

Max: *proceeds to kick them in the shin and run away*

Nancy, walking past: Rule number 1, don't call Max cute or small.

(Big mistake, only El is allowed to say it)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: *sneaking in through their window*

Robin: *turning in their chair and flicking the light one* You want to tell me where you've been all night?

Max: I was with Nancy?

Nancy: *turning in their chair* Wanna try again?

(dum dum duuuu)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

The next one is gonna have Dustin and his Dads (idk when I'm gonna post it tho)

(I love that the first letter is the same, Dustin and his Dads, Max and her Moms 😂)

Also Sapphic Senate while be in the next one.

#long post #robin buckley #murray bauman #Murray adopting Robin #max mayfield #nancy wheeler #ronance

[separatist-apologist]

Hey!!! I’m curious to know, why don’t you like Bryce or CC? Personally the first book was better than the second book but overall, the series hasn’t been too bad (minus the whole crossover thing)

You want to ask me, on this our first day of elucienweek, why I hate Bryce and CC? ESPECIALLY when you admit you like them? Oof.

I mean, I'll share but I'm not interested in changing my opinion or like, softening this.

First of all, and I will die on this hill, Bryce is a fucking pick-me of the HIGHEST order. This is a problem with the narrative and not so much her, but if I wanted to read endless prose on how fucking hourglass, Kardashian hot a woman was, I could pick up a Branden Sanderson novel. EVERY SINGLE MAN has to simp for Bryce, including Ruhn who has a very uncomfortable passage in the first book where he is looking her up and down in her tight jeans. Bryce can't walk down the road without being sexually harassed and she seemingly likes it. Who's fantasy is that? What in the wattpad is that?

Second, every single man in the book is standing in a line behind Hunt to fuck Bryce. IDK what your experience with this is, but I have some personal experience with men pretending to be your friend so they can have a shot. It never reads as genuine but OF COURSE Bryce doesn't mind that they all openly and desperately want to fuck her. We're treated to thought after thought about her body, looking her up and down in a way that feels very "through the male gaze" and I was just over it 400 pages in. WE GET IT. Oh my GOD.

SJM loves to do this thing where she puts you in the POV of a character who has knowledge the reader should know and instead will use that POV to lie in order to create some big reveal. 500 pages looking for a missing child? LOL Bryce figured that out on page 26 and this whole side quest has been a massive, frustrating waste of time. Of course she did, she's so smart. She suffers from Aelin syndrome where she just keeps secrets from EVERYONE because, presumably, no one can be trusted? For ReAsOnS that made me want to slam the book to the ground.

Of course Bryce is also the main protag so we're told over and over she's smart and talented and whatever but OH MY GOD everything she does is STUPID AS SHIT. This was my issue with TOG. Aelin was the best assassin, according to the narrative but every time you saw her assassin-ing, she was pretty bad at it. Or how Cassian/Azriel are elite warriors but endlessly injured. Like, either make your characters NORMAL or make them REALLY badass. Bryce isn't particularly smart, she's impulsive and makes endless bad decisions and it's just fine.

The whole "we're better than the humans thing" was a choice. That whole plot, in book 2, where Bryce is just 'meh' and treats the rebellion like they're beneath her was a really bad look. Was it supposed to convey she's better than them? Because honestly, both books give off this supreme sense that Bryce thinks she is just better than everyone else and she does not need to treat the people around her well. She's shitty to Lebehah (or whatever her name was) and that creature literally DIED for, why? She's shitty to Ruhn who is endlessly going to bat for her, she was unnecessarily bratty with Hunt in book 1 when he was trying so hard to help her with Danika, like this is a pattern of behavior for Bryce.

And unlike Feyre and Aelin who like, grow and learn, Bryce gives off this aura of "I am fine as I am" girl you are easily the worst of the three. Like I get it, party girl roped into shenanigans but we are 1600+ pages into this story and Bryce is just stagnant and not particularly fun when you're trapped in her headspace. I read book 2 because twitter spoiled the ending and I knew I was going to have to read it in order to continue ACOTAR, but honestly if SJM wasn't doing this cursed crossover, I would have DNF'd.

And if you liked it, I'm not saying you're wrong for it or whatever. I know a lot of people prefer CC to ACOTAR and TOG. I think it suffers from all the same problems as SJMs other series but her protag isn't half as likable. Her side characters are. My love of Ruhn is decently known. Ultimately there are too many problems with the convoluted narrative that don't make it enjoyable for me.

#anyway #anti crescent city #im sorry #im br*ces biggest hater #anticc

[noddytheornithopod]

Started playing Jedi: Survivor! Gonna post miscellaneous thoughts I’m having as I play through it. For reference, I’m also playing on Story Mode (I just want to be safe cuz I have no idea what will be thrown at me lol).

And of course, if it wasn’t obvious, spoilers under the cut.

So we begin with Cal being “captured” and taken to this Pau’an senator (the same one as in the first teaser). He seems to be like a big shot... or at least is hoping to become one, since he’s hoping to gain the Emperor’s favour by saying he caught a Jedi. It’s really just a ruse (the cops holding Cal are actually fellow rebels working for Saw Gerrera), and well soon stuff gets crazy.

Probably the most notable issue so far is framerate? Like, for reference, I’m playing on PS5 and am using Performance Mode (it would be pointless to do anything else since my TV only has a max 1080p resolution). It’s not exactly bad, like it definitely isn’t the nightmare that PC players seem to be experiencing, but I find that especially between the transitions between gameplay and cutscenes it can get kinda choppy. I get why the cutscenes have a lower framerate, it’s so they look more cinematic, and honestly I’m more than fine with that, but the transitions and even a few gameplay moments feel slow.

Also maybe it’s just because I already know how Fallen Order played and I’m also on Story difficulty, but I think the opening level dragged out a bit too long? It makes sense it’s an easy and simple level, but eh, who finds tutorial sections fun anyway, lol.

On the other hand, being in the Coruscant underworld was a pretty cool opening setting. There’s a lot of narrative parallels to Fallen Order already, and there’s parts of Coruscant that actually remind me of Bracca in some ways. Many parts looked a bit dark, but IDK if that’s just my TV or what, but that aside it all looked cool.

Nerd moment: the first enemies you fight being the patrol troopers from Solo was fun. What’s more fun than killing stormtroopers? Killing COP stormtroopers.

Bode seems cool, I guess. I do feel like them emphasising the monetary involvement he’s working with Saw for is gonna come into play later on though, like if someone offers him more to pay for him and his kid he could pull something on Cal. Also they introduced the buddy AI system, which lets you tell your friend to do certain things, and command them to help you in fights. IDK how effective it will be (especially on Story mode where so far I’m cutting through Stormtroopers like nothing lol), but it’s still cool to have your pal show up and fuck with some enemies.

Cal’s already got some fun quips, but I’m also interested to see he already seems darker. Like, when they eventually capture the senator, he basically makes a death threat, but what really stood out to me was when you learn the confusion power. Like, he literally says something like “I don’t think Cere told me to use it like that”. And like... that line only made me think of Ezra at the start of Season 3 of Rebels even more than already recalling Ezra puppet that walker off that base. Two Jedi who feel like they need to do more to stop the Empire and Dark Side, but are flirting with darker tactics to get there.

So Ninth Sister returns. The way she talks almost makes it sound like she’s some recurring enemy Cal keeps running into. KESTIIIIIISSSSSSSSS!!!!! But yeah she’s the first boss (which feels a lot like the first Trilla fight on Bracca, speaking of which another parallel has Cal pull a Trilla on one of the gunships surrounding them). Cal... fucking decapitates her. It’s an interesting moment to me, another sign he’s darker of course, but I’m getting a lot of different feelings here. Like on one hand, he doesn’t seem to relish it at all, even trying to reach out to her, even calling her Masana Tide, her original name before she turned dark. But on the other... he’s like “I’ll set you free” and decides who must live or die. Like sure, Masana wouldn’t listen to him, she’s just full of rage and pain, but still, playing executioner like that was still a dark moment to me.

I should also mention the lightsabre stances, because the boss is where you first lean dual blade. So far... I’ve barely used single blade, lol. I’m fine using double and dual blade for now, honestly. IDK how it is on harder difficulties, but I think they compliment each other nicely. Double blade for crowd control and more defensive fights, and dual blade when I feel like being more offensive. Also, nerd brain just thinks it’s neat to have a sabrestaff you split and put back together.

Controls are mostly similar, there’s some slight changes here and there, I’ll get used to them with time probably. Force powers still work as expected. I’m a monster that loves using confusion to make enemies fight each other, lol. It IS cool that it can’t work on all enemies though, like purge troopers are immune since they’d obviously be trained to resist mind tricks, some creatures you can’t seem to affect I guess because they’re just too weird or whatever, and you can’t use it on droids because they’re not organic. Making Bedlam Raiders kill their own droid underlings they’re in charge of is funny.

Oh yeah, Koboh. Only gotten up to Greez’s cantina and I just stopped right after I found the part we need for the Mantis, but it already feels massive. Interesting scenery too, like it reminds me of a savannah in like Australia or even Africa. Also, I’m guessing the bogling population came from the Mantis stowaways in Fallen Order, lol.

The minimap is much more helpful actually. Still a bit complex, but there’s a lot more notified to tell you where you can go and even traces where you’ve come from, and it helps give clearer directions on where to progress too. It’s not so easy like say Lego Skywalker Saga where the default just lets you follow markers that tell you exactly where to go, you still need to look around sometimes to find how to progress or solve a puzzle, but for someone like me who can get stuck for pretty stupid reasons, it is handy to have these extra hints.

So the scene with Cal and BD looking at old footage they had of the crew together was definitely sentimental. It seems to be around or soon after Fallen Order since the characters still have their looks from that game, but it’s nice to see the times they spent together, and you can tell how much Cal misses them all even if they all parted ways.

On the other hand... we got TWO Greez salt jokes within the span of a few minutes. They KNOW and they really want to remind us, lol. First, one of the videos displayed has Greez say to Merrin say something like “too much salt is bad for you”, which well, yeah, the irony is obvious. There’s also what used to be the Mantis’ terrarium now holding some old belongings, and one of them was Greez and salt related, I think it was his salt shaker? But yes, salty Greez fans, you will not be disappointed.

The locals at Koboh seem interesting enough so far. Little frog due and big Klaud dude! Rayvis had an... interesting first impression. Like at first he’s all shouty and dramatic to the point where I found it a bit much, but after Cal kills his enforcer, he actually starts acting more honourable and subdued? Hard to read guy, I guess. Sounds like he’s building to something, though I have no idea why harassing people on some Outer Rim world is necessary for that. Like, the people in the bar talk like they just show up and cause trouble because they can. Cal stepping in to defend the frog dude was cool though, nice reminder that at heart he’s still a Jedi even if I have... questions about some of his new tactics, lol.

Greez reunion! Was a pretty sweet moment, honestly. And there’s also a sassy droid at the bar who co-runs the place (I think their name was Monk?). Greez is rightfully concerned about Cal though, like Cal misses the crew but it sounds like his own obsession with fighting the Empire was a key factor in what caused the rifts to form in the first place. Something definitely seemed to happen with Cere especially, like when Cal talks about Merrin Greez is like “actually I was asking if you’ve spoken to Cere”. Cal does lose it for a moment, too. He feels like because he might be one of the only Jedi left, he has to shoulder that responsibility to fight the Empire. It’s kind of like the opposite to Obi-Wan’s situation - right around this time, Obi-Wan has given up hope and thinks it’s pointless to do anything, while Cal is so into the fight it seems like it’s consuming him. Like, Greez made this room for Cal to chill in even for a bit, but Cal’s all GOTTA GET ON THE MOVE. Also, for more parallels, a callback to the sleep talking scene, lol.

Anyway, stuck underground and Cal noticed something weird, I’ll get to it later and we’ll see what else happens!

#star wars #jedi: survivor #sw spoilers #jedi: survivor spoilers #js spoilers

[violetsareblue-selfships]

The Truth Comes Out

Ship: EiMiko x April | Word Count: 1690 | Warnings/Tags: First person POV, a smidgeon of possessiveness (on Miko's side specifically)

A/N: Ominous title for a very fluffy fic lol - also I'm posting these all out of order (and not in the order I wrote them either lol) But! It'll make sense regardless and that's all that matters! <3 I hope you all enjoy it.

Being summoned to Tenshukaku is starting to become a regular occurrence. Enough so that I already have everything ready to take with me, plus a container of my most recent baked good for Ei.

The townspeople no longer stare as I walk by surrounded by the Shogunate soldiers. There's only so many times it can happen before it's no longer news, especially when I'm the one being accompanied.

I'd complain about it but I know it simply stems from Ei's desire to protect me. If it guarantees her peace of mind, then I'll allow the guard each and every time.

Miko's waiting for me when we arrive and my heart flutters just from seeing her. I dart away from the soldiers and run up to her, hearing her laugh softly as I eagerly pull her into a hug.

"Mm, seems like someone's missed me…" Miko murmurs as she wraps her arms around me as well. "Hmm…" She hums, the tinge of an unfamiliar emotion in her tone.

When I pull back, her expression is barely different, but there's something there that confuses me. Did I do something to upset her just now?

"Come on, let's go to Ei. She's bound to worry if we take too long." Miko murmurs, pulling back further, her hand gently finding mine.

I want to ask if something's wrong, but I know her. She'll just tease me for getting worried to distract me. If she wants to tell me, she will. So, I let her lead me to the room that Ei's in.

As it did when I saw Miko, my heart flutters when I see Ei, but I manage to restrain my urge to run up to her. Miko would only tease me more for my eagerness. Not that it's necessarily a bad thing.

"Hello, April." Ei says warmly and I feel like I could melt at the sound of her voice. Instead, I smile and hand over the container, giggling as her expression brightens. "Thank you. These look delicious."

Miko huffs softly and I expect some kind of tease about me constantly keeping Ei supplied with desserts. But she says nothing. Instead, Ei speaks again. "Miko… Are you jealous?" She asks softly.

Of course, Ei would recognize the emotion in Miko's expression better than I could. Still, the realization that Miko's jealous has me turning towards her, my head tilted in confusion. "Miko?" I ask softly and she sighs.

"It's stupid, honestly…" Miko says and she must see something in my expression as she shakes her head a little. "Fine. The issue is that you smell like another fox."

I blink at her and there's a small pause before Ei starts laughing softly. "Is that all this is, Miko?" She teases and Miko huffs, crossing her arms.

"I told you it was stupid… Why do you smell like a fox?" Miko asks, looking at me accusingly.

"Ah…" I breathe out, looking between the two of them a little unsure. It's not like Miko's likely assuming - that I was out playing with the foxes in a human form.

"It doesn't matter right now. I just need to…" Miko trails off and there's a flash of pink smoke. My heart melts at the sight of the tiny pink fox sitting on the ground in front of me.

Ei's once again giggling while Miko (I'd assume this is her fox form?) scratches at my leg until I kneel down to pick her up. I move to sit down by Ei while Miko keeps rubbing her fur over me - my face, my chest, anywhere she can reach.

"She's scenting you…" Ei breathes out, amused and fond. "I guess that means you really are stuck with us. When her fox claims you…" She trails off but I get the point.

Miko continues to scent me while Ei and I talk. A wet sensation on my cheek cuts off my next sentence and I look down at Miko. Somehow her usual smug expression translates very well onto her vulpine features and I huff softly.

"Did you just lick me?" I ask, a little surprised. She lets out these soft chitters that sound almost like laughter and I roll my eyes. "Silly fox."

With that, there's another flash of pink smoke and Miko's in her usual form again, though she's still sitting in my lap. My face grows red at the sudden closeness and she laughs softly as she loops her arms around me.

"There. You smell much better now." There's a bit of possessiveness in her voice too. I don't mind it. In fact, I like the way it sounds. "Now, talk. You have me very curious, little one.

First off, your house always smells like all sorts of animals, even some that I'm sure do not inhabit Inazuma, and now this? What's going on?"

Ei looks a bit curious as well and I sigh softly. "I suppose it's only fair. You've finally trusted me to see your fox form, so I should open up as well." My words only make them look more curious. "I assume you know of the magical creatures of other nations?"

Both of them nod, looking more intrigued. "Then have you heard of a species of immortal shapeshifters?" I ask.

They're both very smart, so it doesn't take long to put two and two together. I laugh softly at the looks of realization on their faces. "Yes, I am one of those shapeshifters." I say.

"Interesting." Miko says. "Though, I wish I had known sooner. We could have spent time together as foxes…"

That makes me laugh. "That's why I smell like an unfamiliar fox. I was testing out a fox form to spend time with you in whenever you showed me yours." I explain and she looks a little embarrassed. Only a little, though.

"How sweet of you." She murmurs, grinning victoriously when I blush. I look over at Ei, who has an awed expression on her face.

"You're immortal…" She breathes out, sounding on the verge of tears.

Miko laughs softly. "Mm. Seems those worries of ours were unfounded, hmm, Ei?"

Ei laughs as well, the sound much more watery. "It seems so…"

It clicks in what they're talking about and my heart feels like it's breaking a little. They'd been afraid of how short a time we'd have together. If I were mortal, I'd have a normal lifespan and then I'd leave them.

Of course, the realization that this won't be happening has to be a shock to them.

"Ei…" I murmur softly, holding a hand out to her, squeezing her hand softly when she takes it.

She gives me the prettiest smile and squeezes my hand back. "This is the best thing you could have told us." She says and I smile back.

"Though…" Miko breathes out, her mouth near my ear since I've turned to look at Ei. I shiver a little and she laughs softly. "Speaking of fairness… You should show us one of your forms."

I whine softly at how it feels for her to be speaking directly into my ear but I nod nonetheless. "I would ask for an animal preference, but uh… I think I know for right now." I say with a soft laugh.

Miko gets out of my lap and I shift into the fox form I'd been practicing with some slight modifications. I'm a little bigger than Miko had been, but I decided to mimic the pale pink color she had, only in a purple this time.

"How cute." Miko says. "Was the purple intentional?" I chitter softly in a yes and she smiles. She holds her hands out and I let her pick me up. "Hm… You still smell a bit like your normal self…"

I take this moment to sniff her, my whole body relaxing at how good she smells. Scents are always different in an animal form, but I've never smelt someone (or something) that gave me such a sense of home before.

Miko chuckles softly, brushing her fingers over the top of my head. "I think I know what that was…" She says quietly. "Your inner fox understands how important I am to you, hmm?"

I nod and she smiles. "Ei, do you want to hold her?" Miko asks and Ei immediately looks to me.

"Can I?" She asks and my heart flutters at how sweet she is. I chirp that same yes as earlier.

"She said yes. Quite enthusiastically, I might add." Miko says and I tilt my head a little at the fact she can understand me even while in a more human form. Though, I guess her kitsune nature never leaves no matter which form she's in… Plus she still has fox ears so it might not be that strange.

Still, Ei gently takes me from Miko's hands. "Ooh, she's just as silky as you are, Miko." Ei says and I perk up a little. I'd felt how soft Miko was earlier so this is a huge compliment.

Ei starts petting me softly and I absolutely melt into her. It definitely feels like she's used to this as she finds spots that have me going completely boneless in her arms.

Again, I sniff her like I did to Miko and her scent is just as comforting as Miko's had been. I've heard that foxes are monogamous before, which doesn't seem to fit here, but I can also tell that these two are the only ones that would give me that same sense of home.

'Mate' as well, but maybe it's a little too soon for that meaning to this scent.

When Ei has her fill in petting me, she sets me gently back on the floor. "You may change back now." She says and I do.

"Now… we had called you here for a date. If you're still up to it, that is." Ei says and I smile.

"That sounds wonderful." I say. If anything, what just happened solidified my trust in them further. It does seem like I'm with them for good now.

I have never felt so lucky in my life.

#self shipping #self ship #self ship story #self ship fic #self insert fic #self insert #self insert fanfiction #poly self ship #canon x si #canon x self insert #our love shines eternal 💞🌸 #my writing

[golbrocklovely]

colby is a very contradicting human being. just when you think he has changed, hes gotten the hint, there is not more he can delete,he goes back and throws in a old snap question from Ms snapchat and we’re back to square 1. i think most of us have caught up to her game by now, how conniving she is, and deemed it pretty pathetic and sad, but he loves to be the second player whenever things are finally starting to settle down and get quiet. if he ruins this year with his shenanigans again i am officially done with all of them. i think twitter has calm down, more people have opened their eyes and then there he goes once again with mlp, and ms snap, and traitor taylor.

i might be giving some controversial yet brave opinions here in this ask lol jk

i'm not saying any of this to you, or that this whole answer is about you, anon. this is more a general, overall feeling i have towards some of the anons i get that mention being upset towards colby about stas or shea or whoever.

i get it can be annoying when he gives attention to these ppl. i understand that it sucks when things finally cool down and grow quiet only for them to start back up again bc he does something. but i think it's good to remember that not everything he does related to these girls is shit-stirring. sure, there are definitely times when he does lurk and likes to see what everyone is saying. but honestly, i don't think this past time (of him using stas' old question on snapchat) was him trying to start anything. highkey he probably just used it absentmindedly. he's used it multiple times in the past, why does now seem different?

also, i feel like just bc we have a problem with someone, and he might have had a problem with this same someone, doesn't mean he has to ignore them for eternity bc it pisses us off. look, i don't like stas, i've made that clear. but i also know that i can't control what he does. even if we all know giving her attention causes issues, it's his life at the end of the day. not to mention, that is his friend regardless of how we feel. sure, they had their problems, they had their kerfuffle; but clearly they moved on from it, even if slightly. she's probably gonna be in videos this year. they might even go on trips together. but that doesn't mean oh he's doing all of this for attention / to start drama back up in the the fandom. tbh i think some of yall give him a lot more credit than you should lol

but even if, for argument's sake, he is doing all of this to shit stir… why isn't he allowed to do that? i get it. it's annoying. but imagine how annoying it must be for him. he can't do anything without being shipped with stas or shea, or another girl if he dares to breathe near her. and even when he tells the fandom to not ship him with his friends, they don't listen. not to mention no girl will ever be good enough for him and this fandom. and then on top of that, he's told who he should and shouldn't hang out with. and while i know a lot of us warn him bc we care, he may not see it like that bc of past fandom bs. he has to walk on eggshells around us in fear of pissing us off which is why he's basically removed himself from almost all social media besides the one he made with sam. he can't even grow facial hair without getting emails sent to his business email telling him to shave it off.

so, is it really surprising that he does shit like this from time to time? if stas can get away with using him for every possible tiktok with a sappy song or poem, why can't he do the same back if he wanted to lol

HOWEVER, that doesn't change the fact that he doesn't want to be shipped with her. it doesn't negate all of the things he's outright said about being single or not liking being shipped with friends. he's made it clear that he doesn't like that. but him being petty doesn't take it back either.

if you're annoyed by it all, that's fine. but i think it's good to remember that it's his life and we're just observing it. we can't control what he does, and tbh there is so much more going on then we even know. also... don't let it piss you off so much. if you need to remove yourself from the situation, do that.

#ask #personal #colby brock #i probably shouldn't tag him but fuck it lol

[hahahax30]

Honestly, reading Lili Elbe's *actual* memoir, I have come to the conclusion that the Danish girl's author is more fucked up than I had thought.

He treats Lili's sporadic nosebleeds as a fantastic aspect of the story, as if her intersex condition had granted her a mini uterus in her nostrils, when in reality it was most likely a result of the anxiety/stress her dysphoria brought in (literally a two-minute search will tell you you can bleed from stress and anxiety), because they were only present when 'Einer' came forth, never when she was embodying Lili; with Lili everything was happiness and tranquility. And he doesn't even *mention* the 'mysterious fits of depression [...] and violent pains [...] disconcerting fits of sobbing' (a direct quote) that came with those nosebleeds, and which he would have somewhat explained them when, physically, Lili was fine. Instead he just implies the nosebleeds are there because she has rudimentary ovaries, and that's low-key infuriating.

Not to say that he completely sexualised Lili's childhood? The only actual thing she did as a child was get into fights to proof she could be 'like the other boys' and play with her sister's dolls when no one but her sister was looking. She didn't have a friend whose penis she gawked at 24/7 nor who tried to assault her at like 11.

Just, please, I wish I could get the Danish girl out of the market and erase it from existence. Or at least have a preface written by one of the numerous trans women (which I'm not lol, but I'll leave one under the cut) who've rightfully complained about how horrible the book is, because I know the Danish girl gets randomly recommended to people who have had no contact with trans people in their lives in order to 'understand' trans women, and that's fucked up.

By Gwen Sund:

I hate this book on so many levels. I will say one good thing. It is a very well written book. The prose is lovely and the author does a good job with descriptions. His handling of the characters and parts of the plot though are pretty offensive. I will not go too far into the history and how inaccurate this book is because as the author mentions in his afterwards Lili Elbe is the only character based off of a real person. Everyone else is completely made up. It's okay that the story isnt' true to life, but that opens up an entirely different terrible can of worms that I'll get into. The order of events is different, how things turn out is different. This is "Base on a Real Event" in the same way Exorcist 2: Bazuzoo Boogalu is based on a real event. There will be some spoilers, so if that bugs you stop reading here. Just know I can't recommend this book in any way. I barely recommend the movie, but at least that doesn't have as many issues.

My biggest problem with this book is the handling of Lili. This author made up pretty much the entire story, so even if there might be historical context for some of the details he still chose to describe Lili the way that he did. I am a trans woman and I found his handling of her to be one of the most offensive that I have ever read. He treats her being trans as multiple personality disorder. Since he chose and created so much of the story I'm not going to give historical leeway on this. He chose to do that. Trans people do not experience their identities that way. We are the same person before and after transition. It's not like a demon possession story where over the story the demon slowly starts taking over. It would have been so much more powerful to have Lily come to terms with herself and her past. Have her find a way to love herself in her own skin. Something more true to the trans experience. This story is nearly entirely fiction, so there's no reason why the story couldn't be told in a more positive supportive manner.

And that point ties into another thing. This book won the Lambda Literary Award for Transgender Fiction. For one the author is cisgender so why didn't the award go to a trans author. They existed. Susan Striker, Jennifer Finney Boylan, Kate Bornstein, and Leslie Feinberg were all actively writing in the year 2000. And that's just a few trans authors at the time. There were plenty more. On top of that the book is very bad at showing the trans experience. It is a slap in the face. I can't even say 2000 was a different time and Lambda Literary has moved on from that because after the Danish Girl movie came out they worked with this author again to help him set up a trans charity. They support this story. They still support it. That sucks. I hate it.

One more thing with the handling of Lili is that she has no agency in this story. People keep making decisions for her, they move her around, they treat her like a child, and they make medical decisions for her. The only decision she makes in this book is the one that killed the real life Lili. Some how Greta is treated like she's supposed to be this super supportive partner, but she just controls Lili to death. There's a part in the book where Greta starts telling Einar to become Lili constantly. Not to be supportive but because Greta has become famous for painting Lili and she constantly wants Lili to model for more paintings. What in the world is supportive about that? Greta literally uses Lili for personal financial gain to the detriment of Lili's mental and physical health. Multiple times Lili asks to stop and is told to stay put.

While we're on the topic of Greta let's just talk about how weird that character is. She is very loosely based on Lili's real life partner Gerda. She was a famous painter that was part of the Art Nouveau movement. She is an important painter in history and for some reason she is turned into this bland concerned straight lady. She is so much more than that and I suggest anyone reading this maybe look up some information about her. The end of her life is sad as hell, but the real life Gerda is so much more interesting that Greta.

Speaking of endings I don't understand why the author changed Greta's true life story so much that she gets to live happy and rich while Lili still ends up sad, lonely, and probably dead from having a uterus transplanted into her. Why the hell did he go out of his way to give so many of the cis characters happy lives only to keep the trans character's sad ending? Why? That's awful. That isn't support or visibility. That is voyeurism. "Look at the old school trans woman that thought she could give birth and died. Oh isn't that weird?" Screw that. If everyone else gets happy endings then cut the last chapter, and have Lili exit the story with the guy that asked her to marry him. Have them go off to New York and live to be happy. This is fiction, give fiction Lili the chance to be who real life Lili didn't get the chance to be.

I hate this book. I hate how many awards it has gotten. I hate that so many cisgendered people have made money on this story. I hate it. I don't necessarily hate the author, I just hate this story. Why did I make myself read the entire thing?!

#lili elbe #david ebershoff #man into woman