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#he will probably end up in the main story lets be honest
raccooninnit · 23 days
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me when i obsess over the twink thats only supposed to exist for backstory
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randomshyperson · 4 months
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One For The Road - Heart Shaped Series
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Chapter Summary: Wanda's first mission as an Avenger was also marked by the first time she met you.
Warnings: typical canon violence, fluff and Avengers working together but nothing major | Words: 2.501k
A/N-> This is an extra chapter (can be read separately and doesn't impact the current plot of the fic). It's just about delving a little deeper into what happened before the main story and I plan three of them in total (the other two will be their first kiss and their first time). Good reading!
General Masterlist | Wattpad | AO3 | Series Masterlist
-&-
Before.
They were there to observe. After all, what criminal in their right mind would let the Avengers attend an event where half the guests were wanted by Shield?
But even on the outside, and accompanied by Barton, Steve and Natasha who were basically the most protective members over her, Wanda was nervous.
It was her first official Avengers mission. Not only that, but she had what they called a perfect disguise consisting of an old American football team cap and sunglasses, and Wanda was having a hard time thinking that it would work. Maybe so, because she had only appeared a few times on television, and wasn't exactly the most popular Avenger among them. 
But there was also Captain America in all of his glory of an enchanted big body wearing the same outfit. So ignoring Steve's warning about keeping it on the down low, she was forced to use her skills when she noticed that the waitresses were whispering about him - One peek and Wanda could read their suspicion. The blonde among them was sure of who he was, but a little influence from the witch and that certainty vanished. She could go back to serving coffee without further doubts.
Steve could thank her later for that.
Wanda's first mission was simple. To observe, to provide support. It was more about seeing Steve in action than anything else. Learning how the more experienced ones acted or something. She knew that Clint was somewhere high up, perhaps in one of the buildings away from the main square. 
In any case, they were all surrounding the large Italian-style mansion on the edge of the island. And Tony in his iron armor was taking care of the offshore area, in case the targets escaped by water.
Everything was going well, and almost tedious to be honest, for hours on end. The gala party was happening loud and clear into the night, but Wanda and the others had the excuse of dinner time to stay at the tables in the cheap corner restaurant. 
"We have our first celebrity guest, Captain." Clint's warning over the communicator almost took her by surprise - but Wanda was paying attention to the mansion's large iron door, where she could see the movement in and out of the party. The equally bored security guards finally got something to do - Opening the door to the visually drunk man heading towards the limo waiting for him.
Steve left some cash on the table, standing up before the drunk man had even finished insulting the staff for taking so long to open the door for him. She knew the captain was heading towards the parked motorcycle to follow the car since that was the plan. But she noticed - felt - something different.
The target was an Italian mobster who had attracted Shield's attention by being quoted in a human experimentation scheme. All those involved in the Hydra project, which created people like her and Pietro, were being hunted down one by one. It was an Avengers-level operation because little was known about how far Hydra had managed to go. How many superhumans they manage to create? It wouldn't be smart to send ordinary agents who would probably be up against people as powerful as Wanda.
And well, there was another detail about the target; he had two daughters. According to the files, the girls didn't take part in their father's work. They just enjoyed the money from a crime like two foolish socialites.
Although the two figures were identical to the photographs in the files, something in Wanda clicked when she looked at what was supposed to be the mobster's youngest daughter.
"Steve, there's something wrong." She gasped into the communicator. The waiter looked surprised - he thought she was talking to him.
"Mi dispiace, signorina, cosa ha detto? (Excuse me, what did you say, miss?)" But Wanda muttered excuse me in a very bad accent and got up. At her warning, Steve hesitated and instead of going to the motorcycle, he stopped at the bar. 
The mobster didn't leave the scene either, confirming Wanda's suspicions that things were very wrong. 
From inside the mansion, two security guards ran out - they shouted that something had been stolen from the sale. And the gate was closed again.
The man, drunk and confused, was searched. The presence of a pearl necklace hidden in his jacket was enough for him to be dragged back by the thugs, who ignored the foaming protests of him and his eldest daughter, who ran inside after her father.
"What's the saying again, thief who steals thief...?" Clint joked over the communicator, clearly from wherever he was, he had witnessed the whole scene.
Although he laughed, Steve began to move forward. "Change of plans, guys. Let's break up the party." He announced, and it was no surprise that the positions of the remaining team members quickly began to reveal themselves.
Everyone left their hiding place to invade the party - Tony's armor was the first to act to hack open the iron gates. Most of the security corps surrendered on seeing the Avengers there, but there was still conflict. Steve just wanted to act quickly before the mobster they had come to capture was executed for stealing a pearl necklace.
And Wanda, well, she followed her instincts.
The mobster's daughter fled the scene - She was supposed to go after her father, but she snuck into the parking lot. Wanda had to run a little to avoid losing sight of her.
The confusion of the party invaded by the Avengers was loud enough to drown out her footsteps, and Wanda managed to hide behind some pillars when the figure reached a parked car. She thought she was about to discover that the mobster's daughter was actually more aware of her father's business than she let on when something much more shocking happened.
Before her eyes, Wanda watched the figure change completely. From the original appearance, only the coat and expensive dress remained.
A shapeshifter? What an incredible thing to witness, Wanda thought. She had only heard stories about Loki and had never seen anything other than Natasha's tools of disguise. This here was truly remarkable.
You hummed low, pulling out a closed suitcase from your coat. The Italian mafia symbol made Wanda understand the whole thing quickly - The necklace was just a distraction. The real theft was what you were carrying.
The coat was discarded on the pavement in the parking lot, but before you could stow it in the trunk, you froze. Wanda had half a second to hide behind the pillar, holding her breath and hoping you hadn't seen her.
Well, worst case scenario, she'd use magic on you.
She risked a peek, but you were no longer near the car. Gone, like the suitcase.
Wanda sighed in defeat, feeling pathetic. Her first mission would be marked with the escape of an enemy. How embarrassing.
But then she was suddenly grabbed and restrained. Wanda gasped in shock, imagining that it was one of the building's security guards. Her magic acted faster than the panic in her system - it went through her body and hit the attacker in the chest, who was thrown to the ground.
"Wow, how did you do that?" The voice that came out was definitely not that of a brute like the party security guards. Wanda turned around panting, ready for another attack, but you were sitting on the floor, back to your original appearance, looking at her as if you had just seen the most incredible creature in the world.
Wanda opened her mouth, but couldn't think of anything to say. She was sure she had been grabbed by a security guard, but then she understood: You had changed to look like one. But her magic forced you to return to your real appearance, and Wanda had to convince herself that the way her heart raced and her stomach did two flips was because of the fright, and nothing more.
Her lack of reaction didn't intimidate you. You tilted your head gently. "You're the new one."
You started to get up, Wanda swallowed dryly, taking another step away.  Her hands glowed as red as her eyes. "Stay back."
But you looked at her carefully, as if you were studying her. And you didn't seem afraid of your powers, even though a minute ago you'd been thrown to the ground for it.
"Oh, I remember you from television." You suddenly declare, a glint of recognition in your eyes. "The girl from the country who fell from the sky."
Wanda tried to steady her trembling hands. "I'll take you into custody. I know you stole something."
But you didn't pay any attention to the statement - You advanced against her and she backed away instinctively until Wanda was pressed to the pillar again. One hand against your stomach and the other on your shoulder, keeping you at a safe distance.
She could have just hit you with the magic, but she didn't. Just like you, she didn't attack.
"What... are you doing?" She gasped in a mixture of curiosity and fear, both hands controlling your distance were expelling her power. One of your hands moved up and grabbed her face gently - Wanda had to bite the inside of her cheek at the way her skin burned at your touch. Was it attraction she was feeling? No, it couldn't be. You were a complete stranger. She had to convince herself that this was fear.
You turned her face to one side and then the other, your eyes so focused that you seemed to be trying to memorize every aspect of her appearance.
"I've never met another one of us before." You say, and Wanda frowns in confusion. Your hand remains on her chin, and she swallows dryly before taking a chance:
"Us? Like... another Baron Strucker experiment?" She deduces, and you nod softly before letting go of her face.
You move your hand down and hold the one she has against your stomach. "It's so warm. What is it?" You ask tenderly about her magic. 
Wanda can feel her cheeks burning but she managed to stammer: "Hm... it’s a form of energy, I think." Jesus, Wanda pull yourself together. Well, who could really blame her for feeling out of place about the whole thing? She was literally on her first mission, being pinned against a pillar in the parking lot of a mafia party by some random thief, blushing under the worshipful gaze of that same shape-shifter while her team blew stuff up in the background. It was too much for anyone. 
She tries to gain a little control when she evades your touch, slipping to the side and putting distance between your bodies again. She also ignores how her hand is tingling, as if she was missing your touch from seconds ago.
"How did the Baron manage to give you energy?" You asked curiously but frowned in a worried way.
Wanda sighed. She really was having a conversation with a jewelry thief.
"It was a stone... um, a special kind. It may sound ridiculous, but it was a magic one. It came from outer space, the Avengers actually have a lot of work protecting them. And well, it now sits on the head of one of us and-"
But you suddenly moved - You lifted the hem of your dress just above your thigh, and pulled out a small, hidden pistol. Wanda's heart leaped to her throat. She barely had time to think about reacting, and you had already pulled the trigger.
There was still an arc of magic protecting her when she risked opening her eyes again. You were both out of breath, staring at each other before you lowered the gun.
The shot wasn't aimed at her, as Wanda realized the next second. But behind her, to one of the party guests who was trying to escape the Avengers by running into the parking lot. And well, catching one of them, off guard was quite an opportunity. The man now was writhing in pain on the ground, bleeding from the shot to the neck that you had hit him with. His own gun, loaded to shoot Wanda, rolled off his hand to the grass next to his body. 
Wanda should move. Criminal or not, trying to murder her or not, he needed help.
You raised an eyebrow at the magical protection disappearing around her. "You’re full of tricks aren’t, you?” You teased while hiding your gun again, now on your belt. “This was fun, Wanda Maximoff. Unfortunately, I must leave."
She shallows, knowing she really should move her feet. "You can't go... I have- I should arrest you."
You glance towards the man on the ground, practically unconscious now before looking at the girl again. "But he needs your help, and what kind of superhero doesn't help a bleeding victim?"
Her body reacts to your sarcastic words; she rushes to reach the assaulter and stop the bleeding. You don’t miss the opportunity to walk away to your motorcycle.
Wanda is too busy with the guest to notice you are escaping - Her magic do the hard part to patch up the bleeding and she’s stuck there with this man, at least for the necessary time for you to escape.
Wanda bites her tongue when she sees your motorcycle flee out the back exit, hoping none of her colleagues saw her letting you escape.
It doesn't even take five minutes for Natasha to find her, worried about where she was hiding during the shooting.
“What the hell happened here?” Asked the widow but as soon as she saw the gun on the floor, she assumed that Wanda was defending herself. She sighs before the witch can come up with an explanation. “Fuck, I’m just glad you’re okay, Maximoff. Pretty hardcore for your first mission, huh?” Nat jokes, and somehow, she manages a little chuckle from Wanda. The redhead gives her shoulder a soft tug. "Come on, witchy, i’ll take care of this one. Go find the others."
Natasha offered her a hand to help her up, but Wanda didn't want to take it. Her own were stained with blood.
"I think I'll go back to the quinjet." Said the brunette with a sour stomach. A lot had happened in a very short period of time. Natasha nodded quickly.
"Yeah, sure, go ahead." Said the widow, forcing a smile when she noticed the way the witch was shaking with adrenaline. "And Wanda. You did alright, okay? More than that, to be honest. You caught the hint that something was wrong very quickly. I’m proud of you.”
Wanda just nodded, taking the opposite path from all the confusion.  Completely unaware that a few kilometers away, at high speed, a shapeshifter left the motorcycle's handlebars to press against their own chest. Trying to understand why their heart was racing so much and the feeling of doing something wrong if the robbery had been a success.
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melodrangea · 6 months
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Hi! Hello! Hope you are well!
Could I request the main gang with steins kid who is a weapon? But they have no meister and basically can fight by themselves or match their soul with their friends to fight with? If that’s ok! If not , then just the gang with steins kid lol
The gang: Soul, Maka, Black⭐️ Tsubaki, Patty, Kid, Lizz, crona and we can’t forget Ragnarok! I just got back into that fandom so I’m insanely rusty on everything 😭
Hi! I'm doing great, how are you?
I am totally loving the chaos of Stein's kid at the DWMA
andddd they're a weapon?
anyways
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The Soul Eater Gang Meets Stein's Kid that's a Weapon
-if I'm being honest, you were probably at the DWMA for a while before anyone figured out you were Stein's kid
-not because you both are ashamed or anything, you just are both private people like that and you see no fuss in making sure everyone knows your dad is a professor
-but for story's sake lets say it's your first day at the DWMA and students just happen to notice that you and Stein have the same last name and look similar
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Soul 'Eater' Evans
-would be cautious around you at first learning you're Stein's kid
-like thinking about how sadistic and crazy your dad is (to him at least)
-let's just say if Soul sees you with a sharp object he runs (it could be a toothpick and he'd run away screaming lets be honest 💀)
-does NOT want to turn out like Spirit he's got enough scars already
-once he realizes you're fairly different from your dad (in that you aren't crazy asf) he's fine
-will ask you at least once a day how you live with your dad
"like how does he even cook? does he dissect the vegetables too?"
-won't openly admit he wants to fight you but he is definately curious
-so when he asks for him and Maka to fight you and you meister, and then you tell him you don't have one
-he is immediately shocked, jealous and crying on the inside
-it's not fair, how can you fight on your own and he can't?
-stays away from you for a little while because he is jealous and intimidated
-but once he learned it was because no one ever wanted to wield you because of your dad so you just fought on your own, he became a lot more empathetic
-you guys are close, both wanted to better yourselves so you spar with each other all the time
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Maka Albarn
-will also be slightly uneasy, but the feeling is washed away withing five minutes of meeting you
-especially if you're in the E.A.T class with her
-if you transfer half way through the school year she will offer to help catch you up and introduce you to other students
-if you like books (specificaly historical romances) FORGET IT
-Maka is ATTACHED
-hope you're ready for marriage
-asks forces you to join book club with her, Tsubaki and Jackie
-she probably won't go out of her way to try and wield you in your weapon form, but of you ask or offer she will be open to it (not for too long though because Soul gets mopey)
-if not she will help you find a meister and compile a list of the most eligible meisters in the school without weapons
-then she realizes you fight on your own (get it baddie) and she's interested all over again
-immediately analyzing your fighting style and figuring out how your are self autonomous
-tries to keep you away from Soul for previous reasons as long as she can
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Black Star
-everyone tries to hide it but somehow he finds out that Stein's kid is transfering to the DWMA
-same scenario as Kid, he's just waiting for you to show up and fight you 🤺
-probably figures it will be an easy win with just him because you don't have a meister yet
-oh how wrong he is
-Black Star is shell shocked when you attack frist WITHOUT A MEISTER
-he is completely thrown off and you end up winning fairly easily (he ofc says he lets you win)
-warns the others to begrudgingly to not mess with you
-Stein is just taking attendance when you walk in after Black Star (Black star is covered in light wounds while you're practically spotless)
Stein: "Alright is everyone here?- Ah I see one of your classmates has already found y/n, and it seems that they made quite the introduction for themselves. This is why we don't mess with my bloodline class "
Class; "WHAT"
-safe to say it was definitely one way to be introduced to your new class
-Black Star is fairly chill with you, in his own obnoxious way ofc
-will still try and fight you periodically
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Tsubaki Nakatsukasa
-has the most seemingly normal reaction to your arrival
-greets you like she would any other person, asking about your experience with fighting, why you joined the DWMA
-when you tell her you join becuase your dad was a professor she was a little shocked to find out it was Stein
-you just seemed so much different than him
-but you explain how he trained you all your life, which is how she finds out that you're a self autonomous weapon
-isn't jealous in the slightest (I mean she has several weapons forms so why should she)
-is slightly concerned for you as a person, you only really knew your dad and without a meister partner she figured you'd be awfully lonely
-so she tries her best to include you on a lot of things, inviting you to hangouts, to train with her, she's even had you over for dinner a few time
-(she let you have her special cookies even bfore black star)
-and since you're such good friends with Tsubaki you do get a lot of Blackstar, but with Tsubaki it's mamagable (even though you do ask her all the time why she chose him as her meister)
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Death the Kid
-interest is also peaked upon finding out Stein's kid would be joining the DWMA
-he wouldn't try and fight you like some others, he'd rather observe you from a (safer) distance
-is definitely worried about you being related to Stein like Soul was
-he ended up getting to know you at Maka's book club (he's an honorary member because he only reads obscure asf 1800's english novels)
-finds out that you're extremely normal calm compared to your dad and is a lot friendlier to you from then on out
-most talking about school, training and book club
-he figures out for himself that you're a self autonomous weapon when you've been at the DWMA for a week and hadn't requested a temporary meister partner yet
-at least that's what he tells himself, he really only found out when he fought you for a training lesson and you fought by yourself
-i'm sorry for the Kid fans but he would REFUSE to wield you since there's only one of you :(
-you guys aren't besties but respect each other and get along really well in group activities
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Liz Thompson
-THIS GIRL ON THE OTHER HAND
-scared ASF of you
-does not like Stein (he reminds her too much or a creepy ghost) 👻
-so when she learns that you are his daughter she isn't running, she's sprinting
-just imagine you walked over to the group, Soul slowly makes his way off while Liz jumps and hits herself in the head trying to escape 😭😭😭
-and when she learns that you’re self autonomous- you never see her again
-im just kidding, she would definatly be intimidated by you, and would watch you from a distance for a while
-but once she learns of your personality she'd definately a lot mroe comfortable around you
-invited you to sleepovers at the mansion and her painting your nails while you gossip 💅🏼
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Patty Thompson
-Patty on the other hand
-oh you're the one that's scared of Patty
-she's just so hyper and energetic, it's just the opposite of you and you're dad and it makes you uneasy
-the air left your lungs when she destroyed the paper giraffe she made during the meister/weapon exam
-it took you a while but you did get used to Patty (to some extent)
-she herself was very excited to meet you
-one of the the first things she called you was "the crazy guy's kid"
definitely got off on the right foot Patty 🙄
-she thought it was really cool that you were self autonomous as a weapon and would NOT leave you alone until you told her how
-you didn't know what to tell her other than years of training
-she got uninterested after you said years lol
-overal you two get a long fairly wel, though you have to admit you mesh better with Liz
-Patty is definitely more tolerable than Black Star so that's something
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Crona Gorgon
-also uneasy upon hearing that you're the kid of Professor Stein
-Crona already doesn't know how to deal with one of him and now to Crona it appeared there were two now
-AND you don't even need a meister to right?
-safe to say Crona is the teensiest bit scared
-Ragnarok thinks you're arrogant for existing on the other hand
-him always wanting to fight or attack you and poor Crona just trying to get away
-Crona also gets more more comfortable with you via book club (it's honestly just therapy with really good cookies at this point)
-you and Crona would bond over you and him having odd parents (though Stein wasn't an abusive bitch)
-you'd both understand being looked at differently for your parents
-after a small while Crona would actually shoe you some of his poetry!
-you both would write side by side in silence (Tsubaki would 100% bake you both cookies to snack on)
-and when Ragnarok would come out and both you both you could just threaten him with your weapon(s)
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-in summary you probably get along best with Liz, Tsubaki and Crona best as Stein's child
-it's extremely rare that you host hangouts for obvious reasons but your'e always invited to other group activities and train with the others when you want!
-the group even starts to look at Professor Stein differently as they watch the interactions between you and your father!
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and that's all my dears!
I hope you enjoyed!
and thank you all so much for the support, I'm working to answer requests as quick as i can!
-Melodrangea
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intothegenshinworld · 5 months
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Fate’s Destiny ~ Chapter 8.5 || The Cavalry Captain
You somehow, not being able to explain it, had fallen into the Genshin world you know oh-so-well. You were no new player and had explored most of the nooks and cranny’s of the world. When you first had woken up in Windrise you wondered; it might be a dream, after all, you were behind your screen usually and now- here? It made no sense, and the world was keen on keeping it that way.
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Warnings: Spoilers for main story.
Word count: 2.6k+
Summary chapter 8.5: What happens after you teleport away and land in Liyue? When you're gone, what will Kaeya do?
Auteurs note: It's been over a year. I will start a new taglist, so comment if you want to be notified at the next update!
Thanks to: @m1shapanda for giving me the motivation to continue posting this series :DD you're the mvp <3
↺ PREVIOUS CHAPTER || ↻ NEXT CHAPTER || MASTERLIST
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Some time ago, in Mondstadt:
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Kaeya watches the healer scan his body with their elemental power. Their hands hover over his chest, emitting a soft glow as they check his lungs. The cavalry captain had insisted he'd be alright many times, yet Eula persisted in having him checked out, hence how he ended up in the med bay within the Favonious headquarters.
Whatever happened on Dragonspine, he knew it had to do with the Creator disappearing. After that blinding flash of light, he felt as if he died, only to painfully resurrect moments later. As good as the healers were, they wouldn’t find the answer to the ache in his chest. That much he was certain of.
An involuntary shudder washes over his body, making the healer pause and look up with concern. 
“Don’t worry.” He tries to humor the situation, “you can't make me feel worse than before.”
Almost instantly, Eula smacks the side of his shoulder and sends him a stern glare. “You’ve got some nerve joking in a situation like this. I will have vengeance for that.” 
Despite her words, Kaeya knew she cared, probably too much, considering what he’d done behind the Knights’ backs. 
“Alright, alright.” He lays back against the pillows of the bed and accepts his fate silently. 
There was no use arguing and no use talking about the situation, not with the healer present. Any word about what happened, and chaos would ensue. 
Mondstadt had been through enough already.
Kaeya and Eula would both keep their silence until they were alone in the med bay. 
The healer continues to carefully examine his state with the help of their vision until they conclude nothing was wrong. At least, nothing physical.
In the end, Kaeya got diagnosed with overexertion of his body and mind, with the simple cure of needing bed rest. It's something he despised more than grape juice or people prying into his private affairs, especially with the situation as confusing and dire with the Creator disappearing.
“Well,” Kaeya breaks the silence in the medbay once the healer had left. He lays comfortably against the pillows as he looks up at his companion, “I did tell you I felt fine.”
Saying that had been a stupid jab at Eula’s worry for him. As the words leave his mouth, he instantly regrets them. Kaeya can’t place why he’s feeling so worked up. 
“You might have fooled that healer, but you can’t fool me. I suggest you stop lying and be honest with me, or I won’t be so patient in the future.” Eula’s voice snaps back at him, cold and sharp.
He places a hand on his chest. “If there ever is another time where I’ll be hiding the Creator from my friends, you’ll be the first one to know.”
“Do not tell me you actually believe that nonsense!” Eula gestures her hands angrily in the air, “ ‘The Creator?’ How could you be so foolish?”
He frowns. It seems yet another person failed to sense the aura of the Creator.
Kaeya wonders what caused this troubling phenomenon.
He lets out a deep sigh. Even if he wanted to argue back, there was no way Eula would believe him. That, and the fact that his chest felt as if it had been caving in on itself. 
Eula brushes a strand of light blue hair out of her face. She seems to have grown calmer, or perhaps simply tired of the same back and forth arguments. ”Kaeya, you cannot hope that Amber or I will be able to keep this quiet from Jean.”
”I was never planning to.”
Eula raises an eyebrow, urging him to continue. 
”She already knows. Or so, I assume. There is no reason why Albedo or I would keep silent after what happened.” 
The cavalry captain watches Eula’s expression shift. She first seems to thoroughly inspect him and his own expressions, then, she glances away and mulls about his statement. 
When she turns her head to ask him for more, the door is slammed open. 
In a fury of rage, a familiar person dressed in red and black enters the rooms like a raging inferno. Red hair frames a face that radiates both coldness and burning hate.
Kaeya had somehow anticipated Diluc, of all people, to come and scold him of all the things he’d done. He just hadn’t expected it to be so soon, and in the Favonious’ headquarters as well. 
” You .” Diluc’s voice is filled with resentment.
With the element of surprise on Diluc's side, he’s already at Kaeya’s side before Eula could interject. An angry glare is glued tightly onto his face. If Kaeya hadn’t been laying as pathetically on the flimsy bed, he was sure Diluc would’ve grabbed him, trying to shake some sense into his brain as he did. 
“How stupid could you be.” Diluc continues, his tone shifting from anger to disbelief. “Trying to help an imposter?” He lets out a chuckle of disbelief, turning away and back at Kaeya as his mind tries to catch up. “I knew the Knights were incapable, but this truly takes the cake of it all.” 
Eula steps forward, her arms crossed as she interjects. “Excuse me?”
“Oh please,” Diluc turns his attention towards the woman. “You’re telling me you weren’t there when the imposter ran away?”
“We were busy fighting. Kaeya–” She whips her head towards the cavalry captain as she speaks, “is the one who caused this situation.”
Diluc seems to agree with that statement, crossing his arms and closing his eyes for a tense moment. Still, he argues her own actions. “Busy fighting each other over capturing the imposter?”
“No we were–” Eula’s words remain stuck in her mouth. 
“You were… what…?” Diluc taunts her. He seemed close to bursting into flames out of anger.
It is Kaeya who finishes the sentence for her. “We were busy fighting the other Albedo, though, you seem to know about that already.” 
Despite the situation, Kaeya’s voice holds a teasing tone and he seems comfortable laying in the bed as the two remain equally angry as confused. 
“You cannot believe me to trust your or Albedo’s words after you so inadequately helped bring yet another disaster to Mondstadt.” Diluc seems done with Kaeya. He speaks the next words to Eula instead, “Care to explain?”
She lets out a chuckle, “I don’t have to explain anything to you, Ragnvindr.” 
And because Diluc no longer is affiliated with the Knights of Favonious, she really doesn’t have to. This puts the redhead in a tough situation that leads to him being even more frustrated. Red eyes watch as Eula leaves the medbay with confidence and silent pride.
Diluc utters a few profanities as he follows Eula.
One last glare gets sent into the cavalry capitain’s direction before the door is slammed shut one final time. 
Kaeya sits alone on the bed until he passes out.
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A few days have passed since the incident on Dragonspine. The place has been closed off for the time being, with the sole exception of Albedo who remains on the snowy mountain, although unlikely in solitude. 
Kaeya had carefully approached the topic a few times with Jean and Lisa, but both had kept their lips sealed, and thus Kaeya was left to speculate what had happened with the doppelganger and the missing Creator.
What connection could the two have…? 
Moreover, Kaeya had no opportunity to inspect the situation. While Jean was as forgiving as kind, she too had her limits, and she’d do anything to keep Mondstadt safe and running for as long as she was Acting Grand Master. 
“Thought we had it bad, but…” The patron in Angel’s Share talks loud enough for the full tavern to hear his story, including Kaeya. “The assassination of the geo archon, or Rex Lapis– whatever , is bound to bring ruin to Liyue Harbor.” 
Another person laughs heartily, raising a glass in a toast.. “I’ll drink to that!”
“Mondstadt doesn’t have an Archon either, though.” Laughter falters and Kaeya hears a loud smack echo over the general chatter of the tavern.
“Just drink up, asshole.”
Whatever brought the cavalry captain to Angel’s share, it gave him more information than he could hope for. 
A happy coincidence, the first stroke of good luck in days. 
“Oh my,” Kaeya grabs the half-empty glass of Death After Noon and turns around in his seat. “How unfortunate must I be to hear the news later than you do.” 
With him facing the group of gossiping patrons, he’s able to note that most of them are Fatui. Their masks are all discarded, forgotten at the Goth hotel, no doubt, but they continue to wear their uniform in the tavern. It’s likely that they’d been overworked and drank a few too many glasses of wine or beer and had forgotten their loose lips. 
“Hey… isn’t that… ” 
Before the group can grow suspicious, Kaeya waltzes over to the table surrounded by Fatui, dragging his own chair with him and inserting himself into the group.
Kaeya smiles, “Now now, I’m just an ordinary costumer.” He puts on his best mask despite the increasing pain in his chest. “Though, I know the best gossip before anyone else. Seems like you were ahead of me this time.” 
One of the more inebriated Fatui members laughs loudly, his belly shaking as he does. “You hear that! This guy thinks he’s something, huh?” 
“Shut up, idiot!” 
“Nu-uh. You’ve been ruining our fun ever since we started drinking. If you’re gonna be such an uptight prick, leave .”
“Whatever. It’s your funeral.”
Tension rises amongst the Fatui, and it’s clear that not everyone has forgotten to keep their mouths shut. Kaeya had to tread lightly if he wanted to prevent causing harm to the diplomatic alliance of Snezhnaya and Mondstadt. But luck seemed to be on his side, and the Fatui member that previously tried to silence the group stood up and left.
Probably the best thing they could do, given their superiors. 
Kaeya was only half sorry for the punishment these Fatui would get once he’d gather the intel and share it with Jean.
“How unfortunate.” Kaeya smiles as brightly as he can, “Some people just can’t seem to loosen up.”
The group agrees with him, and he’s considered one of them by the time he gives them a free round of drinks. Kaeya no longer has to put in any effort to retrieve the information as it’s handed to him on a silver platter.
“So,” one Fatuus stares at another, “He was just killed?” 
“Fell straight out of the sky. Believe me, Alexey swore to the Tsaritsa he saw it with ‘is own eyes.” 
A fatuus shoves the other nearly out of his seat, “You’re lying. You can’t just kill an Archon. Don’t be stupid.”
“But if it’s—”
“You think…” 
There’s a brief silence after the murmurs, and Kaeya instinctively leans closer. The Fatui look at each other and then hang their heads low. The cheerful atmosphere from before has instantly dissipated.
The Fatui seemed to have realized that their superiors might have been involved, something that doesn't seem too far-fetched in Kaeya's eyes.
The cavalry captain makes up his mind and leaves whatever is left of his Death After Noon on the table, making a half-hearted excuse to leave so he can report back to Jean.
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Before going to the headquarters, Kaeya stops and thinks that the death of the geo Archon might be too far-fetched to be true. However, with the recent descent of the Creator and their defect aura, nothing seemed ordinary anymore. For the small chance the intel to be true, he’d have to try.
So, he shared everything with Jean. If he were to be caught keeping any information from her at this point, he’d be digging his own grave. And for the slim chance of the news being true, he’d bring in extremely valuable information.
Jean crosses her legs. “We know.”
“You know?” Kaeya blinks. 
He’s stunned. 
The Acting Grand Master simply smiles and tells him not to worry, but that only causes the pain in his chest to rise.
Lisa chimes in. “Say, what were you doing in Angel’s share during work hours?”
Drinking to chase away the feeling of impending doom,
“Gathering intel, as you heard.”
Kaeya leans back into the chair across Jean’s. Certainly doing nothing wasn’t good for Mondstadt either. Why would Jean choose to ignore the death of Liyue’s Archon, especially if she confirmed the news to be true?
The mask of confidence falters and Kaeya’s voice turns to something unrecognizable to himself, “I don’t think this is good.”
“What isn’t?” Jean shares a quick look with Lisa before returning her gaze to Kaeya. 
“Doing nothing.” He sighs and puts his hands on the desk, leaning closer. “I know you don’t believe me, really , I don’t blame you.” He hesitates, “But now with the death of Rex Lapis?”
Kaeya puts his weight on one armrest, leaning with his arm over to the side. He thinks about all the stupid ways he can put this, a way to see the Creator again, but the situation continues to grow more and more complex. 
He can no longer act alone. 
“Jean,” Lisa’s voice interrupts the silence. “Perhaps it would be time to send a diplomat to assess the situation in Liyue.”
Kaeya can’t believe his ears. Was he hearing this correctly?
She continues, “The situation is growing beyond our control and it’d be best to confront this problem before rumors can spiral and cause panic.”
The cavalry captain turns his head from Lisa to Jean. Whatever prompted the librarian to come to his aid, he’d be reaping the benefits. 
“Oh my,” he starts slickly, ”That does seem like a good idea. After all, if the Fatui already knows, we should have all the juicy details as well.”
Jean sighs, she rubs her thumb between her eyebrows in a helpless way. After a moment, she looks up again. 
Her voice sounds exhausted, ”So, who do you suggest?”
Lisa chuckles, ”Without any cavalry, our captain here might have the most free time on his hands. Especially if he’s been caught drinking in Angel’s share during work hours.” 
A small jab in his direction, but Kaeya takes it as a compliment. ”Excellent idea, Lisa.”
While he shares an equally mischievous glance with the librarian, he hears Jean ruffle some papers. ”Okay–”
Kaeya smiles-
” –but only if you take Diluc with you. ”
Kaeya´s expression darkens.
”Diluc, really?” he suppresses the disappointment in his voice. 
”He was the one who told me about Liyue’s predicament, and he is more than capable of handling situations like these.”
If Diluc had heard of the incident before Kaeya, it was most likely due to a city lockdown, which might have delayed his business between Dawn Winery and the partners he had in Liyue. This meant Diluc would be going to Liyue regardless of this conversation, and considering Jean's adamant decision, going with Diluc would be better than not going at all.
”...fine.”
Jean seems to relax and sends him a warm smile. ”I’ll be expecting you to act as the Mondstadt’s diplomat, keep that in mind. Report to me if you find anything noteworthy.”
Kaeya stands up from his seat. ”You know I won’t disappoint, Acting Grand Master.”
When the door closes shut behind Kaeya, Lisa moves to sit in the now vacant chair across Jean. She sends her a warm smile, which fails to bring ease to the Acting Grand Master. Jean throws her head into her hands in a desperate attempt to hide her stress. 
“Lisa.” The blonde lifts her head, “Did you really think it was wise to send him? Shouldn’t we keep this between the four of us?”
The librarian leans back into the chair, crossing her legs comfortably once she’s settled, and calmly sighing. “If he stays here, he’ll pry until he figures it out.” Lisa turns a finger in the air. “And I do believe Diluc would keep a close eye on him for us.”
“Still…”
“Don’t worry so much,” Lisa places her hand over Jean's. “We’ll figure out what’s going on.”
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© intothegenshinworld. Do not copy, repost, translate or take heavy inspiration from my content. Thanks for reading.
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thechaoticdruid · 3 months
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Welcome to my humble party!~
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[My Astarion Fanfic Masterlist]
Just call me Druid since I really have no intention of revealing my real name for the foreseeable future.
I decided to make a masterlist just to help organize my stuff!
~Original Characters for story or RP stuff~
Winnifred The Druid -My Tav
Arva Nightshade -Winnie's closest pre-tadpole friend.
Fi The Hornless -A talented bard and a member of Arva's pack. She helped look after a juvenile Winnie.
Elora Ancunin -Under developement...
RP Note: Winnie is currently open to answering questions from all of you beautiful people! She is an open book so do not be afraid to ask away! Astarion may even make an appearance in the reply depending on the question. No he will not bite you, Araj! Just make sure to label your ask; Dear Winnie, Question for Winnie, Hey Winnie, I dare Winnie to, etc, and we will let the fun begin!
More NSFW type questions are accepted, but only by people who have their age visible on their blogs. Minors attempting to ask or anons without any age identification will be blocked/ignored. (Also let's try not to ask anything too gross okay.... I'm into some weird stuff but you know limits, my dude.)
~Multi-part Fanfics~
[This Bites] Astarion x Chubby Female MC
A young woman ends up literally stuck with a fictional vampire from her newest video game obsession! She now must deal with keeping him safe and hidden all the while dealing with stress from her shitty stepdad.
Chapters: 1, 2, 3 ,4 , 5 , 6
Valentine's Day Special: Eat Your Heart!
[The Spawn Vs The Ascendant] (Fem) Tav x Astarion(s).
Astarion and his lover Tav are happily together after defeating Cazador and freeing 7000 vampire spawn into the Underdark. They are now preparing to take on the Elderbrain when an Astarion look alike, claiming to be 'The Vampire Ascendant' appears and demands the Spawn hand Tav over to him.
Parts: 1 , 2 , 3 , 4
The Spawn vs Tav vs The Ascendant: A smutty one-shot that doesn't really take place in any particular time during the events of TSvTA. MDNI 18+ (Though if I'm honest it probably takes place post story.)
[Firsts] (Named!Fem! Tav x Astarion) Winnie has noticed her vampiric companion had been acting much more aggressively flirtatious lately. Of course, he flirted with everyone, this was common sense. But ever since Winnie had given him a taste of her blood it seemed she was the main target of his affections. Which quite frankly confused the hells out of the young druid. He couldn't actually be interested in her? Could he?
MDNI 18+ There is smut! The second half involves the Tiefling party!
[1/2] [2/2]
[Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts] (Chubby F!Tav x Astarion) After failing yet again to find a good lead on the Ring of the Sunwalker Tav and Astarion return to their current and hopefully temporary home in the Underdark only to be greeted by a distress signal from an old friend and an invitation to extravagant soiree hosted by an eccentric stranger!
Chapters: One ,
~Headcanon lists!~
[Astarion x chubby!reader headcanons!] (GN! Reader)
[🍿Watching movies with Astarion!🍿] (GN! Reader)
[BG3 companions babysitting your kids!] (GN! Reader)
[Telling the companions baby news!] (GN! Reader)
[Meet the Parents!] (A fun little writing challenge I put together. I wrote up headcanons of Astarion meeting my Tav's parents and Winnie meeting Astarion's parents.)
[Astarion's Teddy 🧸] (A little HC about Winnie giving Star a plush.)
~Other~
[All Wrapped up!] A short AstarionxF!Tav Christmas one-shot inspired by my God-awful ability to wrap presents.
[We'll Protect Each Other] While staying at an inn in the Underdark Tav and Astarion are forced to protect each other. Tav defends her lover's honor which later leads to a visit in the night from a familiar face. (Protective! Tav x Astarion One-Shot.)
[The Bite Scene] A rewrite of Astarion's bite camp event with my Tav, Winnie. It was basically a draft from my abandoned long fic.
[The Monster Hunter] Happens right before the The Bite Scene. It's a rewrite of the encounter with Gandrel out in the bog. Another draft from my abandoned long fic that I just decided to share.
[Indulging Curiosity] (F!Tav x Astarion SMUT MDNI) After a particularly bloody battle with a pack of gnolls Astarion finds himself rather hot and bothered seeing his favorite little druid absolutely drenched in blood. Unable to help himself he invites her to join him for an evening of pleasure where he indulges in some of Tav's sexual curiosities.
[Seriously, now!?] (Named!Tav x Astarion, period comfort fic) After causing a scene, embarrassing and being shouted at by the party's own resident wizard, Winnie storms off alone to sulk. Her monthly bleeding is upon her and making everything seem so much worse! But perhaps her vampiric lover can make it all better? (MDNI, slight smut at the end.)
~Taglists~
[Forever] A requested rewrite of the camp event where Astarion's siblings come to kidnap him, but featuring Winnie!
[Delicious] (Named!Tav x Astarion) While camping in the Underdark the tadpole crew gather around the fire telling stories to pass the time. One way or another they turn into tales of old lovers. Which brings up a curious question? How come Winnie had no lovers before Astarion? (MDNI SMUT AT END)
[This Bites] Comment on the latest chapter to be added!
[Winnie during BG3] Comment here to be tagged whenever I drop any fics that take place during Baldur's Gate 3 campaign!
[The Spawn Vs The Ascendant] Comment here to be added to the taglist, but hurry! This fic will soon be complete!
Blog Rules ig: Okay so I normally try to promote positivity it's why my fics are mostly comedy based. That being said, anyone who comes here acting like an asshat is getting blocked. I don't tolerate homophobia, heterophobia, biphobia, panphobia or really any kind of discrimination towards anyone's sexuality. Transphobic behavior is also unacceptable and will result in a block. Racism, or sexism of any kind is also not tolerated, understand? We're all going to be friends here. Treat people the way you want to be treated.
Requests???
Hi, friendly neighborhood Druid here. My ADHD gives me a shit ton of trouble writing so I'm real iffy about doing requests of any kind. That being said, I'm currently only taking specific requests involving Astarion x my Tav Winnie where I rewrite a scene from the in game campaign. I've already done the Tiefling Party so that is out of the question. And so is anything post Act 3 final boss. I'm also honestly just open to chatting through the asks.
-Druid
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zerobaseonefics · 1 year
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reaction to the lipstick trend (pt.2) ㅡ park hanbin, junhyeon, kamden
boys planet trainees x gn!reader
genre : fluff
I HAD SM TROUBLE WRITING FOR JUNHYEON FR. YOU WILL PROBABLY FEEL IT </3 hope y'all like it tho 😔🤙🏼
pt. 1 here
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• P.Hanbin
at first, hanbin bring that trend up as a joke... but he didn't expect you to be so hyped up about it and to run to find the lipstick. he's not complaining tho, he thinks you're cute when you're excited about something. even more if the something is peppering his face with kisses.
when you came back, you had two different colors. you plopped on his laps, sitting sideways, as you showed both of the colors.
"which one do you prefer?"
an idea bloomed in hanbin's mind. you know, there are basic principles for an healthy relationship. one of the main point is to trust your significant other. however, you made a mistake by trusting hanbin, because he was literally going to scam you in order to get more kisses.
faking hesitation, hanbin chooses the pinkish one.
you fell into his trap with no problem, applying the lipstick on yourself with hanbin telling you when it was good since you had no mirror with you.
your attention went back to him, and with no hesitation whatsoever, you started planting soft kisses all over his face. they were longer than a simple peck, to make sure the stain would be visible enough.
hanbin closed his eyes, a shy smile that he tried to refrain on his face. you started with his nose, then moved down to his chin, back to his cheeks. he savored the feeling of your soft lips on his skin as you kissed his jaw. your kisses ended up going to his forehead and you finished, looking at his pleased face.
hanbin didn't open his eyes yet, thinking you would kiss him more. when he felt one of your hand ruffling his hair, only one of his eyes popped open.
"you're already done?" he asked.
"yes! i think you have enough marks on your face."
"could've let you kiss me all day" he muttered inaudibly as you grabbed your phone. it was okay, he had a plan anyway.
"should we record now?" you said and he nodded.
you recorded the video the same way it was done on tiktok, and you sat with him to review it, making sure it was good enough to post. you loved it. hanbin loved it. but it isn't about love right now, it's about being a fraud. hanbin was a fraud but that is a okay, because scammers also deserves a love story!
"i think we should do it again because the color isn't suitable with the light of the room. it's not pretty enough with the color of my hair neither. when i think about it, maybe we should try again with your other lipstick."
everything goes according to plan because you were completly oblivious to his stratagem. you simply grabbed something to wash away the stains on his face and the color on your lips. he let you cup his face while you softly brushed a tissue against his skin to take off the previous kisses. that's how hanbin, a mastermind, succeeded in making you do that trend three times in a row in order to have more kisses.
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• Kamden
"i would rather stand naked in alaska cornered by a hundred people than do this."
you felt like your jaw dropped to the ground when kamden replied this to your request. sure, you knew he would be reluctant, but not that much! he just couldn't take this seriously, the whole concept sounded stupid to him.
"so. you want me to sit here in front of a camera while you reapply lipstick but you fail just for the sake of failing and i use my finger to do... whatever they are doing on that tiktok and then i have to look at you like i'm.... yeah no. do it with your teddy bear or something."
you whined at his brutally honest opinion, a bit shocked considering the fact he spit his venom with a straight face.
"what? it's cute, right?" you insisted, sure he was going to change his mind for you. he looked at you as you gave him dejected puppy eyes. kamden scoffed, looking away. there was no way he's falling for this. no, he was stronger than this. in his opinion, intimacy was supposed to stay... intimate. why would people on the internet have to see this kind of content from you two? plus, it just ruins a moment to turn on a camera while he's with you. it's staged. it's not natural.
you sighed in defeat, realizing there was really no way in hell kamden would do this.
"right... that's okay, i'll ask a friend to do it with me."
"yeah, just do tha- what?"
an alarm has been triggered in kamden's brain. if you did this with a friend, wasn't it weird? and what friend were you going to do it with?
"what friend?"
"you mean 'who'?"
"yeah, who?"
"i don't know, maybe jay."
it was enough for kamden to change his mind. he pointed his finger at you, with a new found energy.
"bring that damn lipstick." your face lit up at his words.
"we're doing it?" you exclaimed.
"yeah, only if you don't post the video."
you nodded frantically. after you went to grab what was need for the video, you sat next to him. "you're ready?" you asked, "yeah, whatever".
despite his grumpy attitude, you weren't oblivious to the way he played nervously with his fingers when you planted the first kiss. you weren't oblivious to the fact that he was biting his inner cheek in order to not smile, either. you knew he liked it, otherwise you wouldn't have done it.
kamden knew he liked it as well. but how could he show it? it would be embarassing after all the fuss he made not to do the challenge. you guys filmed the video, and you respected your promise by not posting it online, keeping it to yourself. this was the day kamden realized he loved cheek kisses the best, and he waited for you to sleep to send himself the video secretly.
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• Junhyeon
you literally asked the wrong person. yes, junhyeon accepted your request, but there was something about him you forgot. junhyeon would combust if he didn't create a mess each day. even a little one, it was fine by him, but this menace could not go to bed happily if he didn't participate into chaos.
"how about i apply the lipstick on your lips for you?" he proposed. you didn't think about it twice, handing him the makeup supply. you felt the makeup on your lips as junhyeon was putting it for you. at first he did it right, but you noticed that little by little, a smirk appeared on his face and he started to go overline. pulling your face away, you jokingly hit his arm.
"what are you doing" you said, acting like you were mad even if you find the joke funny.
"what? isn't overlining the lips trendy?" junhyeon responded, acting innocent.
"yeah, act like it wasn't one of your jokes" you rolled your eyes still pretending to be annoyed.
"you were so pretty i couldn't stay focused, that's why" junhyeon explained in a dramatic tone.
you made an exaggerated grimace after hearing his cheesy words, hitting him once again. junhyeon's laugh ringed through your ears while you were catching a tissue to clean up your lips. he looked at you from afar, a smile on his face. junhyeon got up from the couch he was sitting on and went to backhug you. you put your hands on his as you felt his lips planting soft kisses to your jaw.
"i'll do it properly this time, if you still want to do it" junhyeon said, resting his head on your shoulder.
"is it another joke" you answered with a straight face.
"yes."
you whined while he started laughing once again. hearing your complaints, he didn't let go of you to make you turn around and face him. then, junhyeon leaned in to kiss your lips quickly. "i'm kidding, i'll be serious this time. i want kisses too."
after that, junhyeon got kisses from you indeed, but not because of the trend.
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thebiggerbear · 4 months
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Tom Hanniger x Reader - Prompt Response - "Sleep. I'll keep you safe."
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Summary: Tom has taken you hostage. This is not the Tom you knew and fell in love with. Unable to escape, can you get him to trust you and maybe even reach him?
Pairing: Tom Hanniger x Female!Reader
A/N: Prompt from @thelonelyempath. So, just out of the gate, not gonna lie, this is one of the most fucked up things I've ever written and probably the darkest. Story wise I mean. There's something about Tom and that world from the movie that I love exploring. Before I knew it, this was nearing 18K and I was like "Crap, time to wrap this up!" I still enjoyed the exploration of Tom and the reader though in the dynamic they're in during this one.
I tried my best do my research and be respectful in regards to DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) but also keep this a few years post-movie (2009) while also staying within the context the movie provided but also explore a bit, if that makes sense. Please note I do not work in the psychiatry, psychology, or medical fields. If I got anything appallingly incorrect about this disorder, its symptoms, its treaments, anything, please let me know. Also, I think it goes without saying (but I'll say it anyway), not every single person who has been diagnosed with DID is violent or a threat to others nor are their alters violent or a threat to others. Obviously, this is just a work of fanfiction based on a fictional story where the main character had an alter that was violent and a threat to everyone. No harm or disrespect is intended with this fanfiction at all.
Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine.
Warnings: explicit violence; hostage situation; mentions of knives; dubcon; sex (smut-light); explicit descriptions of murder; mentions of burying a body; explicit threats of physical violence; explicit threat of sexual violence; explicit threat of neonaticide (I highly recommend looking this word up if you don't know what it means so you can decide if you still want to read from there; I didn't feel comfortable spelling it out here to be honest); physical threat of neonaticide; explicit threats of murder; mention of past sexual violence; mention of past sexual assault; implied past domestic abuse; misogynistic language; language
Word Count: 18k+
Tom Taglist: @heartlessdelusions; @nancymcl
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe."
Soldier Boy version | Beau version | Dean version | Jenny version | Jason version | Anael version | SDV Alex version
<-->
When you came to, you glanced around the cabin you were currently tied up in. Tears blurred your vision, strands of your hair matted to your face, and you could feel the gag cutting tightly into the sides of your mouth. You didn’t bother trying to yell or make noise. You knew the cabin you were in since Tom had brought you here once to see it; there was no one and nothing around for miles. The next town over where Tom could get supplies was the closest thing and that was about an hour’s drive. 
How had things gone so wrong? You tried to be a good person, you always tried to do the right thing…so how did you end up here?
You already knew the answer to that, though. Because you let him in. Literally, right through your front door.
As if your thoughts summoned him, Tom appeared from the kitchen with two plates in hand and a huge grin, despite a black eye and cut lip he was sporting. He laid yours down in front of you and you could see chicken parmesan, your favorite, surrounded by linguini and green beans. He then placed down his own plate in front of his empty chair before turning back to you with a look of determination. “Alright. Let’s get this off you. No screaming, okay?” He asked, using a softer tone than you’d heard from him all day. “No struggling. And no running.” As if there was any point in screaming or running; no one would hear you and he’d catch you before you made it ten feet. He loosened your gag and pushed it down past your chin to hang around your neck. When you didn’t scream, he graced you with a warm smile. “Good girl,” he murmured as he began working on the ropes tying your hands to the chair. When he moved down to the ones on your legs, you rubbed at your sore wrists, noting a few surface cuts around your arms. He noticed and a frown formed on his face. “Sorry, I won’t tie them as tightly next time,” he promised. You didn’t know what else to do but nod.
When he was finished, he sat up and his fingers gently gripped your chin, forcing your eyes to meet his. His green gaze bore into yours and he tenderly trailed the backs of his fingers against your cheek, almost watching you in some sort of odd reverence that you had no idea existed until the last couple of months. He began to lean in, presumably to try and kiss you like he had earlier, but he must have thought better of it and stopped, digging his teeth into his bottom lip as he got to his feet. While you were grateful he hadn’t connected his lips to yours, you had to wonder what deterred him and that made you worry. He studied you for a moment and, just as you feared, he then made his way over to the other chair being used, his soft expression immediately hardening and his warm eyes icing over as they settled on your estranged husband.
He grabbed the back of the chair and dragged him away from the table, choosing to dump him in a corner on his side, making Miles groan in pain. Tom kicked him for good measure and you heard Miles yell out against the gag in his mouth. 
“Please,” burst out of you. “Please, Tom, don’t!”
Tom’s glare snapped up towards you. “After everything he’s done to you, don’t tell me you’re still protecting him.”
You knew you had to act quickly, to cajole Tom so you could draw his focus away from Miles. You were the only reason Miles wasn’t dead yet, you knew that without a doubt. “I’m not,” you soothed. “I just want to eat the dinner you went to the trouble of making for me. It’s been hours since I last ate and I really need to eat. I’m sure you’re hungry, too. Please, just come and sit down.”
Thankfully, Tom’s eyes softened a little at your pleading but he still gave Miles one more good kick that made you flinch before he came over to join you. He pulled a knife out of his jacket which made your heart start to pound a little faster but he simply smiled as he also produced a plastic fork. He leaned down and began to cut your chicken into bite size pieces for you. “I, uh, I’ve never made chicken parmesan before so I hope it’s alright,” he told you, a shy smile on his face. You marveled at how he could go from being the scariest thing you’d seen in your life one minute to being the sweetest and most humble guy you’d ever met in the next. “And I know green beans aren’t what would usually go with this dish but I didn’t really have anything else.” He rubbed at the back of his neck, chuckling nervously.
“I’m okay with green beans,” you quietly assured him.
He dropped his hand and smiled, looking relieved and leaning in to tenderly kiss you. You tried your best not to tense up as he did. Tom then made his way over to his seat, leaving you the fork but not the knife. Not only did he not want to chance you using it on him but he most likely didn’t want you using it on yourself either. You never would but he obviously wasn’t too sure about that. You watched as he poured both of you a glass of sparkling cider and sat down a few battery-operated candles between you.
When he handed you your glass, you were disappointed to find it was plastic. He really had thought of everything. He misread your expression and assured you, “I know it’s not the best but I wanted something nice for you for dinner. I’ll get something better though, next time I’m in town. I promise.” You offered up a thin-lipped smile and a nod which seemed to placate him for the time being. So he planned to keep you for a while then. You only hoped Miles would keep his mouth shut and that you could get Tom to start trusting you as you waited for an opportunity that might come your way with the aforementioned trip to town.
Tom took the seat across from you, smiling, and reached over to touch his glass to yours. You watched as he took a sip and after a moment, you joined him, making him grin happily.
As hungry as you were, you weren’t in a rush to eat anything that he had prepared for you out of sight. What if he was intent on drugging you? You weren’t even sure if he hadn’t before. You barely remembered how you got here. All you knew was Miles showed up, having found you, and Tom reacted, then nothing until you woke up here. The only other thing you remembered was blonde hair and so much blood— You tried to shut that thought out. Thinking about Tom again, If he planned to keep you here for a while, he’d have to sleep at some point and he could be planning to drug you then, like right now. And God only knew what he planned to do with Miles; you prayed you could somehow convince him to let the man go while you stayed behind (even though that would be just as dangerous for you). Though Tom hadn’t been wrong; Miles didn’t deserve your compassion. But that didn’t mean you wanted to watch the man you’d once shared a life with die brutally either. If Tom’s distaste for your husband was anything to go by, if he decided to end Miles, it would indeed be brutal.   
“Something wrong?” 
The question snapped you out of your reverie. You glanced up to find Tom watching you worriedly. You forced a reassuring smile onto your face. “No. Of course not.”
“I thought you needed to eat.” His eyes bored into you, flicking back and forth from the plate to you.
“I will. I’m just…taking it slow.”
He frowned at your food. “It’s not that good, is it?”
“What? No. No,” you worked to reassure him. “It’s just that…” You didn’t want to voice the words and chance angering him.
“Just what?” When you couldn’t think of a way to phrase it and kept quiet instead, he urged you in a softer tone, “Eat, sweetheart.”
You realized then that you had no choice but to take a few bites if you didn’t want to do anything to anger or upset him. You hoped to God that there was nothing in it.
Almost as if he read your mind, his jaw tightened as he went to spear more chicken with his fork on his plate. “There’s nothing in it if that’s what you’re worried about. I wouldn’t do that to you.” His eyes lifted to yours, that soft reverence back in them. “To either of you.” He flicked them to your round stomach in meaning and then back to you again.
You wanted to believe him, especially when he looked at you like that, but wouldn’t it be easier for him to be rid of the child that wasn’t his? Then again, he hadn’t killed Miles yet and he fancied himself in love with you, and you were currently housing said child… Perhaps he truly didn’t mean your baby harm, while it was in utero at least.
Tom let out a heavy sigh and dropped the fork, making it clatter against his plate. He was now scowling over at you, clearly displeased at your show of distrust in him. Uh oh.
Now definitely without a choice, you took a forkful of chicken and slowly bit into it. He seemed pleased with the action and after a moment, continued to eat himself. As you quietly chewed, you realized that it wasn’t half bad, and you were starving. As scared as you were, you knew you would need to keep up your energy for any opportunity to escape, to get you and your baby to safety, and truthfully, you needed to take any chance at a meal that you could. Tom smiled to himself as you really dug in. 
You had halfway cleaned your plate when you heard “So it’s okay?”
You stopped to see Tom sitting there, leaning forward and watching your every movement, the biggest grin on his face. You swallowed down the chicken you had just stuffed into your mouth and held a hand over your lips self-consciously. “Good,” you admitted quietly. “Very…good.”
Satisfied with that answer and himself, he sat back in his chair and continued to smile over at you. Though it was unnerving, you continued to finish your meal, your goal being to keep your strength up for your baby. When you were done, he got to his feet and grabbed his plate, slowly making his way over to you. Your heart pounded with each heavy footstep and it nearly stopped when he reached you. 
Tom grabbed your empty plate and slid his still half-full one in front of you, placing your fork onto it. When you turned a puzzled expression up towards him, he leaned down and pecked your lips, murmuring to you, “You two need it more than I do.” He kissed you one more time before he walked away, heading into the kitchen. You watched him go in shock, thoughts racing in your mind. Knowing he had eaten some of the food and remembering his promise, after mulling it over for a minute or two, you then dug in, your focus on the chicken and green beans. You needed as much energy as you could get.
<-->
He spooned you that night after insisting you take the only bed in the place — his bed. You felt him press a tender kiss to the back of your neck every few minutes and while that made you uncomfortable, his hands gently rubbing your belly had you absolutely terrified. You imagined all sorts of horrible things as you laid there in the dark, with only a shaft of moonlight sneaking into the room through an opening in the curtains. You kept expecting a knife to be pulled, a fist to collide with your bump, to feel the stab of a hypodermic needle — something. It got so bad that you started to shake and Tom, thinking you were cold, moved the blanket over you both a little higher before resuming his ministrations. You wanted nothing more than to throw his hands off of you and get out of the bed, moving away from him. It was one thing for him to have his hands on you, though now it made your skin crawl in the worst way, but your baby…you would give anything to keep him away from the one person you’d do anything to protect.
You were frozen in fear despite the tremors of your body. You felt the baby move and while that should have overjoyed you like it usually did, it caused tears to start rolling down your cheeks, soaking the pillow beneath you. How much longer would you get to feel that? How much longer would Tom allow you to keep your baby?
“Oh,” he exhaled against your neck. “She’s kicking.”
You closed your eyes, forcing more tears to fall, as your lips trembled. You thought back to the first time he’d come into contact with your baby this way. You had been such a fool — such a blind, trusting, naive fool. 
You were cleaning a wooden frame of a painting with a rag when you felt the familiar movement within your tummy. “Oh,” you chuckled, holding a hand to the side of your stomach. 
“Are you okay?” 
You glanced up to find Tom up on a ladder, watching you with furrowed brows. You gave him a bright smile. “Yeah, of course. The baby’s kicking. Come down here, quick.”
Still looking worried, Tom hurried down the ladder and approached you. 
“Give me your hand.” You grabbed the hand he offered up and placed it right where you had just felt movement. Tom glanced back and forth between you and your stomach, looking unsure for what he should be feeling.
A moment later, the baby kicked again. “There! You feel it?”
You knew he must have because an expression of surprise and awe came over his handsome face as he stared down where you held his hand. 
Another kick happened and it made you laugh. “Oh, she’s very active today.”
Tom smiled over at you. “You’re having a girl?”
“Well, I don’t really know what I’m having yet but,” You grinned, feeling yet another kick. “I hope it is.”
“Then I hope it is, too.” You glanced up to find him watching you with that soft look you’d seen before. You gently squeezed his hand in thanks and then focused again on your bump. 
Tom had been helping you restore the old house you’d moved into. You felt comfortable around Tom, he put you immediately at ease when you met. He’d been a huge help to you and when you had moments like that, you just chalked it up to him maybe having a little crush on you. At least that’s what Cindy, a new friend of yours (and the realtor who’d helped you find the place), said the first time she’d seen you two together when she stopped by to see how you were doing and how the house was coming along. But you never thought anything more of it. Tom never made a move or asked you out. He also never encroached on your personal space without invitation or pushed past your boundaries. He never did anything to make you uncomfortable. As you got to know him, you began to trust him.
But now, you wondered how you could have ever been so stupid.  
“You feel that, Y/N?” He breathed, grabbing your hand and holding it to your stomach. “She kicked again.” His tone was so full of wonder and happy surprise that you immediately started to cry. His hand traveled from your stomach up to your hair, smoothing it away from your face. “What’s wrong? Are you in pain?” You could hear the sudden concern. 
“Are you going to kill my baby?” You choked out on a sob.
You felt him turn you onto your back so he could look down at you. He looked less than pleased but he murmured, “No. I told you, I would never hurt either of you. I love you.” He inclined his head towards your stomach. “And her. Everything I’m doing is for you both. I wish you would believe me, Y/N.”
“I really want to,” you cried.
He wiped at your tears and stroked your cheek, before leaning down to kiss you. This time, you opened up for him when he sought entrance beyond your lips and you knew he was pleased by the little groan he let escape into your mouth. You didn’t protest when his hands roamed all over your body, thankfully steering clear of your stomach. You didn’t say a word when he stripped you of your clothes, whispering “Beautiful” as he uncovered every inch of your skin. You didn’t fight when he urged you to open up for him and his tender touch brought you to heights you had never reached before with a partner other than him that left you gasping for air. As you shivered and shook, unable to keep from crying out, and dug your fingernails into his arm, he smiled lovingly down at you. While you came back down, he pressed kisses to your hair, face, and lips. He watched you, almost if he was waiting for something, so you hesitantly reached out for the button on his jeans, thinking you now needed to return the favor, when he stopped you.
“This was about you,” he murmured before kissing you. “It’s been a long day. You should get some rest.”
You nodded, not wanting to disagree in the slightest. He pulled the blankets up over your naked form and urged you onto your side again, away from him. He spooned you once more and placed a kiss to the back of your neck. “Sleep, sweetheart,” he murmured. “I’ll keep you safe.” His hand then cupped over your belly protectively. “Both of you.”  
You bit your lip to keep the tears from starting up again. God, you hoped that was true.
<-->
The next morning, you woke up alone, feeling groggier than usual. You panicked for a moment, thinking Tom may have drugged you after all, but you remembered you hadn’t eaten or drunk anything before you went to sleep. You also didn’t find any obvious injection sites when you searched your body in the bathroom, using both mirrors to your advantage. You chalked it up to everything that happened yesterday. It had been taxing on you, mentally and physically. You were just exhausted and needed more sleep. You might even need a nap today, if only you could relax enough to take one. Though you didn’t see that happening anytime soon. You dressed and made your way out to the main room, worried about where Tom was, though you felt a little relief seeing Miles in the room, still breathing. 
You found Tom in the kitchen, making you breakfast, and he gave you a big smile when he saw you. “Morning, Beautiful.” He leaned down and pecked your lips, giving a gentle stroke to your belly with his free hand. “My two beautiful girls.” You forced a smile and hugged him from behind, laying your head against his back, just like you used to do. You hoped that the gesture of affection would keep him just like this, a semblance of the Tom you’d known before Miles ever showed up. It must’ve worked because he squeezed your arms with his free hand and continued cooking.
Thankfully, this time when you sat down at the table, he didn’t tie you to the chair. Instead, he smiled at you as he placed the plate of eggs in front of you and pressed a kiss to the side of your head. “Eat, sweetheart,” he urged. “And then I want to show you something.”
You nodded, immediately digging in and not wanting to displease him. 
His smile grew as he watched you and he leaned down once more to kiss your temple. “That’s my girl,” he murmured. His hand slipped down to your belly and gave it a rub. “My girls,” he corrected, before walking back into the kitchen. 
Miles, who was still gagged and tied to his chair, glared over at you from the corner of the room. At some point before you came out of the bedroom earlier, Tom had righted his chair so now he could watch every single thing you and Tom did. You weren’t exactly sure what Tom was planning but you didn’t like it. You especially didn’t like that the man who had terrorized you for years was currently staring at you with pure hatred, as if he’d like to kill you, as if all of this was somehow your fault. In a way, you supposed it was because had you not let Tom into your life in the first place, this wouldn’t be happening. But then again, had Miles left you alone and not coming looking for you, Tom wouldn’t have snapped. At least, you don’t think he would have. And Cindy would still be alive.
“Fucking crazy bitch.” Your eyes snapped to Miles who was still scowling at you. Whatever he said was usually muffled by his gag but you could hear it clear as day. You frowned and went back to your food. 
Tom reappeared just then and placed a bowl of cut up fruit in front of you. 
“Thank you,” you whispered. 
He gave you a nod, seeming pleased, until he noticed Miles glaring over at you. You watched the change happen within his expression and suddenly you knew you needed to intervene and quickly. Before he could move, you reached out and grabbed his hand, prompting him to look down at you. 
“I need to get exercise. For the baby. Will you take me for a walk after I’m done?”
His eyes briefly softened while the rest of him did not. “Of course.” He dropped your hand and moved around the table, coming to a stop in front of Miles. “You keep looking at her like that and I’ll cut your eyes out and feed them to you,” he threatened with a menacing edge to his tone. “Don’t forget, the only reason you’re even still breathing is because of her.” Tom straightened up, a terrifying smirk on his face, before he punched MIles. You winced, dropping your fork to your plate.
Miles turned back to glare up at Tom, more blood seeping into his gag. “Fuck you, you piece of shit! Fuck you and that fucking crazy whore!” He yelled against the gag. Tom gave him one more punch for good measure, causing Miles to yell out in pain, before he walked away, that smirk still on his face. You watched as Tom sat down across from you and tucked into his own breakfast, seemingly unbothered by what just occurred. You quickly glanced over at Miles, seeing him still glaring but blood coming out of his broken nose.  
“He doesn’t deserve your sympathy.”
You quickly looked back at Tom to find him watching you, not glaring so much but also not seeming pleased.
You gripped your fork tightly but forced yourself to keep a smooth expression. “It’s not sympathy, but pity. Pity that he doesn’t know when to shut his mouth.” You turned a glare over on your husband who more than gladly returned it.
When you turned back to Tom, he was studying you, smirking. “Finish your breakfast, sweetheart, so I can show you my surprise and then we can go for that walk.”
You did as he instructed, digging into the fruit, not wanting to displease him any further. Thankfully, though, he seemed to be mollified, for now.
<-->
You stared around you in horror, your knees feeling weak. You held onto the wall for support.
Tom had taken your hand and led you to a small room in the back of the cabin that you had no idea existed, near the bedroom you had spent the night in. He smiled at you and told you to shut your eyes when you arrived at the closed door. You did as he instructed, not wanting to make him angry. He opened the door, led you into the room with his hands over your eyes, and then asked if you were ready. You nodded and he dropped his hands as you opened your eyes and looked around you, your jaw dropping. 
“Surprise,” he crowed. “What do you think?”
You were thinking you were going to be sick. You were staring at an exact replica of the nursery you and Tom had put together back in your house, right down to the crib sheet, mobile, paint colors, and night light. Everything you had purchased for your nursery, he had obviously gone and bought a double of to place here. You even spotted the same rocking chair in the corner, the same changing table, and the same toys and books you’d decorated the room with. The same stuffed animals sat in the crib. Even a double of the breast pump machine you’d bought was sitting on the changing table. 
“What do you think?” Tom asked happily as he glanced around. “Is it just like the one we put together back at your place?”
You robotically walked to the changing table, opening the cabinets underneath, and you saw the same outfits you’d bought, folded and arranged in the exact same way. You held a hand to your mouth; you felt the urge to scream but you couldn’t let it out. You started to shake. How long had he been planning this? To kidnap you and your baby and bring you both here?
“I know what you’re thinking,” he said from behind you, forcing you to tense up and drop your hand, schooling your features before you turned to look up at him. He was watching you worriedly. “I only did this as a back-up. In case we ever had to come out here. If that bastard out there ever tracked you down and we had to leave quickly, I wanted to make sure you and our daughter had everything you needed.”
Our daughter. It felt like you were falling into an endless void and you would never wake up from this nightmare. “Why didn’t you tell me?” You managed to ask.
He framed your face with his hands. “I didn’t want to worry you. And I figured it would be a nice surprise if we ever did have to come here. A little piece of home.” He gave you a soft smile. “Do you like it?”
You nodded, not sure what else to do, not able to say anything right then. He grinned and kissed you, happy that you liked the surprise. You thought you’d been in trouble before when he tied you up and brought you out here where no one could hear you scream. Now, you realized, you were in so much more trouble than you’d even imagined.
<-->
Tom held your hand as you both walked the property. Thoughts were racing through your mind but you did your best to pay attention to every inch of the land that he took you to. 
“You’ve been quiet.” If you closed your eyes, you could swear you could hear the Tom that had become your friend and confidante over the months you’d worked on your house together. 
“Just…overwhelmed. And tired.”
Tom stopped in his tracks and your heart rate picked up, worried you had somehow said something wrong.
He turned to you, staring into your eyes, a layer of concern shadowing his expression. “I know this has been a lot and it’s an adjustment. But I promise you, Y/N, all I want is for our family to be together. Without having to worry about sick fucks like the one in there,” He inclined his head back towards the cabin. “Who want to threaten that, who want to hurt you.”
Tears began to well up in your eyes. “And Cindy?”
His jaw tightened and he looked away. “She wasn’t your friend.”
“She was,” you choked out. “And she was a good one.”
His gaze snapped back to yours and he lifted his free hand to your cheek, stroking it with his thumb. “No, she wasn’t, sweetheart. How do you think he found you?”
You shook your head, shaking a few tears loose. No, you refused to believe it. He was just trying to trick you into believing it so you would see things his way. “No. She wouldn’t do that. No.” 
Tom wiped your tears away and you could see pity staring back at you. For a cold-blooded killer, it threw you for a loop that he could feel anything like pity or worry for you or concern for the baby or any other emotion besides anger, jealousy, and hatred. “When he showed up in her office, he asked where you were and she told him, point blank. No hesitation, just ‘here’s the address’. He even admitted it.”
“No, he lies. He probably showed up in uniform and that’s why she—”
“She knew better. You told her that was a possibility, you told her his name so she could be on the lookout. And still, she didn’t think twice about it and sent him over to find you.”
“No, she would’ve called me to warn me if that happened, if she had no choice. Maybe that’s why she was there…to warn me.”
He gave you a look. “She wasn’t your friend, Y/N. She gossiped about you behind your back. She came onto me at the Christmas party, though I had gone there with you.”
That revelation surprised you but honestly, you didn’t know what was up or down anymore, never mind the truth.  “We went as friends. We weren’t together then.”
“She knew I liked you, that I wanted to be with you.” He leaned in and brushed his lips against the corner of your mouth.
You waited until he straightened back up. “That’s still no reason to kill her,” you gritted out, a tear rolling down your cheek. 
He looked at you sadly, wiping the tear away. “I know.”
Your brows drew together in confusion. You hadn’t expected that response. 
Tom pressed a kiss to your forehead and tightened his grip on your hand. “It’s pretty cold out. Let’s get you back inside where you can get warm.”
You let him lead you back to the cabin, turning that last part of the conversation over and over in your mind. From the sound of it, he knew his killing of Cindy had been wrong. A spark of hope started up in your chest though you were afraid to trust it. He still had you and Miles captive here, after all.
<-->
That night, as he spooned you from behind in his bed, he was kissing your neck, his hands moving all over your body. You could feel his erection digging into your back. “I love you so much,” he murmured to your skin. “It’s just you and me, sweetheart. You and me. And our little girl.” He placed his hand on your belly, trailing his lips up to your jaw. You closed your eyes, tears rolling down your cheeks, and you tried to imagine the Tom who had first made love to you nearly a month ago, who had sweetly kissed your baby bump every time he left the house and every time he came home. You held onto that Tom in your mind as he undressed you, then himself, probed you to make sure you were ready, and slid into you from behind, sighing happily into your neck as he did. He gently pumped his hips into yours and you could feel his hand making its way down between your legs, touching you in a similar way to how he had touched you last night, with complete tenderness. “We were meant to find each other,” he grunted into your ear as you arched your back and laid your head against his shoulder, reacting to his touch. “Be a family.” You tried to ignore his words and only focus on the pleasure coursing through you. He’d said these things to you before, back when he was your Tom, and you’d believed him. 
You could hear the old bed creaking beneath you and you could feel his rhythm increasing, the moans and sweet whispers in your ear picking up in frequency. You knew he was close and you squeezed your eyes shut harder, trying to imagine you and him back in your bed at your house, as if nothing had changed between you. That image helped bring you closer to the edge and you reached an arm back, gripping his hair, crying out as you got even closer and closer. His pace increased and the headboard was knocking against the wall now, his groans sounding out in rapid succession, almost tangling with your cries in midair, joining together in an almost impassioned chorus. Lost in your fantasy and the sensations you were feeling, you moaned out, “Kiss me.” Tom’s mouth was on yours, his tongue sweeping against your own, and that pushed you over the edge. You stiffened and he swallowed your cries, grunting loudly himself and intertwining his fingers with yours, squeezing as he fell over his own edge. You were still shaking a couple of minutes later when he slipped out of you and gently rolled you onto your back as you caught your breath. 
You could see him beaming down at you, still panting himself, his hair messy from your fingers, eyes bright and full of adoration for you. The same way he’d looked the other times you’d had sex in the past. It made your heart soar but also break mid-flight. “I love you.” You saw how much he meant it and your heart completely shattered.
Your eyes filled with tears as you reached a hand up to stroke his cheek. “I love you, too,” you whispered. And you did, this version of Tom, anyway. His smile grew and he laid his head down on your chest, sighing in contentment as you ran your fingers soothingly through his hair. Tears dripped down your cheeks as you held him, wondering how the universe could be so cruel as to send someone to you that loved you and your baby so much only to have him turn out to be a cold-blooded killer. 
<-->
You woke up alone again, even groggier than the day before. At this point, you wouldn’t be surprised if Tom was actually drugging you in some way once you fell asleep. You had held him until he fell asleep himself last night but obviously, at some point, he must have woken up after you passed out.
You felt irritable, which was most likely a side effect of the grogginess you felt and possibly whatever Tom was drugging you with, as well as typical pregnancy hormones. It was so bad that you couldn’t even be bothered to drum up a smile for Tom who was looking at you like you were the best thing that existed on the planet. You took the food he gave you and dug in, not even thanking him like you usually made sure to do.
You felt off and when he spoke softly to you, “Eat, sweetheart, and then we’ll go for another walk”, you nearly snapped at him, demanding to know what he’d been drugging you with and why. You’d only just held yourself back, reminding yourself you weren’t supposed to say or do anything that would anger him.
Miles, though, was fair game. 
He had called you names, though muffled by the gag, the minute Tom stepped out of the room. You ignored him as best you could, though it still got under your skin. Who the hell was he to sit there and call you things like “whore” and “slut”? Even if he had heard you and Tom together last night? Was he so stupid that he didn’t realize the predicament he was in, that you all were in? Had Tom’s threats and beatings not made it clear enough? When Tom got up to get you more decaffeinated tea, Miles threw more insults your way and you decided, yes, he really was that stupid. Nothing you hadn’t already known, you supposed.
Tom placed the tea in front of you and you gave him a nod. His brows drew together for a moment before he smoothed them out, taking his seat once more. He glanced between you and Miles. “Everything okay?”
“Terrific,” you snapped. It didn’t hit you until you said it what you had done. You quickly glanced up at Tom who didn’t look displeased at your attitude (thankfully) but was studying you intently. “Sorry,” you offered more gently. “I’m not having a good morning.”
He nodded, his brows still drawn together. “Well, finish up and we’ll get out of here for a while, stretch our legs, and get some fresh air.” He gave you a patient and understanding smile.
You gave him a wan smile in return, realizing how lucky you were that he was being so understanding and hadn’t gotten angry with you. You were picking up the plastic butter knife to spread jam on your toast when Miles said something nasty to you both, once again muffled by his gag. 
At that point, you’d had enough. You dropped the knife and pounded the table with your fist, making the plates shake. “Shut. Up!” You yelled over at him. He scowled at you but did indeed shut up. You realized what you’d done and you worriedly glanced back at Tom. His eyes were flicking back and forth between you and Miles before getting to his feet. Your heart leapt into your throat. Oh no. Now you’d done it.
He made his way over to you, glaring at Miles as he did. When he stopped in front of you, he held out his hand which you warily took. He pulled you to your feet and gripped your chin between his fingers. “I think we should go for that walk now. Okay?” You nodded, not exactly sure what was going to happen but you noticed him shooting a terrifying glare in Miles’ direction. You remembered you needed to keep your strength up so you picked up the piece of toast you had been intent on eating and took it with you as he led you to the door. He saw and chuckled, squeezing your hand, as he opened the screen door for you both to walk through.     
<-->
“You feeling a little better?”
You turned to look at him, wondering how to answer that. Yes, you weren’t as edgy, but no, you didn’t exactly feel better. You finally settled on “A little.”
He gave you a hint of a smile and nodded, averting his gaze to the path in front of you. 
After a minute, he spoke. “You know, if he’s becoming a problem, I can take care of it.”
You froze, stopping in your tracks, your eyes wide. This was exactly what you didn’t want.
He noticed you had stopped and glanced back at you over his shoulder with furrowed brows. 
You didn’t want to anger him but maybe you were too tired, too scared, or too irritated — you couldn’t help but finally speak your mind. “I don’t want you to kill him.”
Instead of angry, he appeared confused as he spun around to fully face you. “Why? He’s obviously upsetting you, which isn’t good for the baby or you, he’s stinking up the place, he refuses to eat anything. Hell, he doesn’t even deserve to live after what he’s done to you. No one’s even going to miss the guy. Not to mention, it would keep you and our daughter safe... What’s the point of keeping him around?”
Tears started to blur your vision as you finally admitted the truth. “I can’t… I can’t kill someone, even him.”
Tom stared into your eyes before licking his lips and looking away. “That’s why I’m offering to do it.”
It terrified you to say this next part but you had to say it. “If this is going to work with us, as a family…you can’t kill anymore people, Tom.” His eyes snapped to yours and your heart began to pound harder in fear. “You can’t kill and I can’t order someone’s death. Even his.” Tears made their way down your face and his gaze softened a little, seeing them. 
He reached up and wiped them away with his thumbs before pulling you into him, pressing a lingering kiss to the top of your head. “Okay,” he murmured to you. “Okay. We’ll figure something else out for him.” He embraced you tightly and you closed your eyes, relieved. “And then it’ll just be us, the three of us, our family.”
You nodded against him, though you secretly knew you still had to figure out a way to escape. Perhaps once you were able to figure out what to do with Miles, then that would leave just the two of you. And then either Tom would be forced to take you into town for supplies which gave you more of an opportunity to escape or get help, or he’d be forced to leave you here. Based on the two walks you had so far, you were starting to get to know the property. Even though there was nothing but woods surrounding you, perhaps you could make your way at least to the property line. From there, you could figure out your next move.
He released you, kissed you, and took your hand again to start heading back. 
“And Tom?” 
He glanced over at you. 
You didn’t want to push your luck but since you had already spoken up about Miles and the killing, you were going to speak up about this, too. Especially since your child was at stake. “Whatever you’re drugging me with at night, you have to stop. It could be hurting the baby.”
He furrowed his brows again. “Sweetheart, I’m not drugging you. I told you, I would never do anything to hurt her. Or you. I would never put either of you at risk like that.”
You wanted to believe him but you also knew what you felt. “Then why do I feel so groggy when I wake up in the morning? And it’s gotten worse each time?”
He studied you, looking as if he wanted to say something, when a sudden realization dawned on his face. A smile crept along his face. “You’re probably tired because I’ve been keeping you up at night. You probably just need a good night’s rest, that’s all. I’ll tell you what, tonight you take a nice, hot shower, we’ll go to bed a little earlier, and we’ll just sleep. How does that sound?”
You didn’t want to appear too eager for him not to engage in any sexual activities with you so you just nodded and hugged his arm, whispering, “That sounds good, thank you.”
He wrapped his arm around you and pulled you into him, leading you both back to the cabin. His smile turned sheepish. “Sorry, sweetheart. I just couldn’t resist you, but don’t worry, I promise to keep my hands to myself. Your rest is more important, especially for her.” He laid a hand over your bump, patting it gently, and you tried not to cringe under his arm.
<-->
Two weeks had passed and truth be told, you were surprised no one had come looking for you yet, considering you, Tom, and Miles were missing, you were pregnant, and Cindy’s dead body had been left in your house. Your due date was little more than a month away, and you were starting to worry you might have to deliver at the cabin if you weren’t found soon. 
Miles was still with you both, alive, as cantankerous as ever. He eventually started to eat the small amounts of food Tom let him have when he realized Tom wasn’t going to kill him and he obviously wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. He still threw insults at you every chance he got but for the most part, you ignored him to the best of your ability. If Tom overheard, which was rare, he beat the crap out of Miles until either you begged him to stop or Miles lost consciousness. You and Tom were still trying to figure out what to do with him, but short of taking him somewhere deep in the woods and dropping him off there with the hopes that a bear might get him, you didn’t really have any options. And since you asked Tom not to kill him, a hostage Miles remained.
Tom had kept his word and kept his hands to himself at night. He still spooned you, still kissed you and caressed your bump, but he let you sleep. You still woke up groggy sometimes, as if you hadn’t slept a wink, but it had gotten a little better. Tom blamed those mornings on the old mattress. He swore he’d buy a new one the next time he was in town (which thankfully was coming up soon). You had taken to showering before bed every night, hoping the hot water would relax your body enough that you would drift off into a deep, restful sleep. You had actually gotten used to Tom cuddling you and you no longer feared for your child’s life when he touched your belly. He talked to the baby sometimes, something you heard while you were falling asleep, and his tone was so gentle and loving and reverent, that you couldn’t help but think he really meant it when he said he wanted all of you to be a family. He had even taken to kissing the bump again throughout different parts of the day or if he had to go outside to chop wood. He cooked for you every day without complaint, though you’d offered to pitch in to help (hoping he would trust you completely and you could get access to knives and other cooking tools that could be weaponized at some point if needed). He’d given you a knowing smile and thanked you but told you that he was fine with the arrangement, he didn’t mind. You mentally cursed yourself at being so transparent but you were also thankful he hadn’t gotten angry. 
For the most part, though, you’d settled into a sort of routine with Tom every day: breakfast, walk, you were free to move around the cabin as he chopped wood for an hour, he’d take you into the nursery to sit in the rocking chair for a bit to either go over possible baby names or to sit and read to the baby or to play music (he had gotten the same pair of fetal headphones you did), lunch, a nap he insisted you take each day to help you rest better while he fixed things up around the cabin, a free couple of hours to do whatever you wanted, dinner, another walk, shower, and then bed. 
You were following this routine one such day when Miles appeared to have finally lost his mind altogether. 
It was dinnertime and you had come into the main room with a book in your hand. When setting up the nursery here, Tom had bought the same books you had to prepare for the pregnancy. You were able to pick up where you left off in What To Expect When You’re Expecting. You sat down as Tom came in with a plate of carrots for you to snack on. He smiled when he saw your nose in the book, mindlessly reaching out for a carrot, and dropped a kiss on your head. “What chapter are you on?”
“Still on the eighth month,” you answered without looking at him, taking a bite out of the carrot. 
“Mmm,” he hummed against your hair. “Maybe you’ll finish it by the time we eat. I’ve got about ten more minutes left and then we’re good to go.” 
“That’s fine. I’ve got carrots to munch on and plenty to read in the meantime.” You held the book up in gesture. 
He chuckled and dropped another kiss to your head before walking away. You immediately got back to reading. 
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Tom loosen Miles’ gag and then shove two pieces of white bread in his mouth. “Here, dipshit.” He slammed a small plastic cup of water on the arm of his chair, spilling most of it and not really caring. “Enjoy.”
Tom left the room with a glare over his shoulder in Miles’ direction. 
Miles spit out the bread and turned furious eyes on you. You ignored him, choosing to go back to your chapter. 
“You stupid, crazy fucking whore.”
Your jaw tightened but you remained silent, picking up another carrot to snack on.
“You hear me? You’re so desperate for dick you’re playing house with that crazy fucker.”
You could feel yourself tense up but you simply turned the page. 
“You’re a stupid fucking crazy whore and I always knew you were.”
You rolled your eyes. “Careful, Miles, you’re starting to sound like a broken record.”
That had been a mistake to say. A shark-like grin appeared on Miles’ face — well, as much as it could with his face beat to hell. “You want to hear something different? Alright, how about this? When I get outta here and I will get outta here, I’m going to kill that motherfucker right in front of you. I’m going to bash his skull in while you watch. Then when I’m done with him, I’m going to come for you.” You tried not to show it but you could feel an age-old fear creeping up on you. “Since you’re such a whore, I’m gonna use you like the whore you are, over and over again, until you’re crying and begging me to stop. And just like old times, I won’t.” You could feel the tremors starting up. “I’ll even fuck you right next to his corpse so you can cry all over his brains on the ground. And then when I’m finished with you, good and finished, I’m going to beat the hell out of you but not before I cut that baby out of you and strangle it with its own cord right in front of you. Then if you’re somehow still alive after all that, I’m gonna kill you. And I’m gonna get a medal for it. ‘Hero cop stops modern-day Bonnie and Clyde from continuing their killing spree.’ You just wait. The governor will be shaking my hand and I may even get a call from the goddamn President, thanking me for my service. I put down three rabid dogs, all for the price of one, the one I was tracking down in the first place. I’m gonna be a goddamn hero for this, for ripping you and your evil spawn from this world. How’s that for a new record, you crazy whore?”
A tear slipped down your cheek and he laughed. 
“I should’ve fucking gotten rid of you when I had the chance. Now, I’ll have that chance and I’m going to enjoy it.” He laughed again.
You wiped your cheek just in time for Tom to walk in with a bow of mashed potatoes. You noticed that for all of Miles’ bravado a moment earlier, he sure got quiet when Tom walked into the room. 
Tom placed the bowl down on the table. “Just give me five more minutes.” He glanced up and immediately knew something was off. “What’s wrong?”
You gave him a thin smile. “Nothing,” you assured him. “Looks like I’m not going to make it to the ninth month chapter after all.” You placed the book down; you had lost your appetite for both knowledge and for food. “I’m actually not feeling well so I think I’m going to go to bed early.”
He tilted his head, confused. “But you were feeling fine a few minutes ago. Was it the carrots? Or something else…?”
You shook your head, ignoring Miles’ chuckling under his breath. “I just need to lay down. I’m sorry, I know you worked hard on dinner. Can you save me some for tomorrow?”
Tom’s eyes darted to Miles, his jaw tightening. “Of course. Get some rest and feel better, sweetheart. I’m here if you need anything.”
“Thanks.” You turned and left the room, wincing when you heard Miles yelling out in pain presumably from Tom hitting him but you refused to turn back and look.
<-->
When you got out of the shower and dressed in the sleeveless maternity nightgown Tom had thought to buy for you, you wiped the condensation off the mirror with a hand and stared into it. You couldn’t believe the things Miles had said to you but then again it was Miles, so you could. A part of you wondered if Tom was right; would it be safer for you and your baby if Miles was gone for good? You shook the thought from your head, not even wanting to entertain it. No matter how horrific Miles was, no matter how dangerous, you weren’t a killer. Even if he was killed by some other means, you didn’t want to be the one responsible. You were better than that, a better person. You wouldn’t become like Miles and let him win.  
You heard a soft knock on the door. “Y/N?”
You nervously licked your lips and went to open the door. You hoped Tom wasn’t upset with you for missing dinner. But when you opened it, all you saw was concern and worry staring back at you.
He ducked his head, meeting your eyes. “Are you feeling any better?”
You tried to smile but it probably came out as a grimace. “Yeah.”
Tom studied you for a moment and then held out his hand which looked remarkably clean considering what he had done to Miles recently. “I want to show you something.”
Thinking it might have to do with Miles, you started to shake your head. “No, I don’t—”
“It’s for the baby,” he soothed. “I have it right here on the bed.”
You let out a quiet breath of relief and took his hand. He kissed your forehead and led you over to the bed where a box sat on top. He urged you to get closer and take a look at it, releasing you. 
You gazed down at the box, picking it up and looking it over. “A home fetal heart monitor?”
“Yeah.” He sat down on the bed, taking the box from you and opening it. “I know you haven’t been able to go for your usual checkup due to our…situation at the moment.” He pulled everything out and laid it on the bed. “I bought this long before we came here, in case we needed it. You said the baby is pretty active every day so I didn’t think it was needed. But, you know what, maybe it’s not a bad idea to check in on her. What do you say?”
You were honestly floored at the gesture and you wondered if he had gotten Miles to confess what he’d said or if he overheard again. Either way, you were touched. “Um…” You bit your lip, trying to keep from crying. Damn these pregnancy hormones sometimes. “Yeah.”
“Yeah?” He grinned.
“Yeah,” you laughed, a tear slipping out as you reached for the wand. 
He read the instructions and you both figured out how to use it. He urged you to sit back against him as he lifted the hem of your nightgown over your belly. He applied the gel and you used the wand, moving it around until your baby’s heartbeat started to sound from the speaker. You couldn’t help but smile.
“There she is,” Tom whispered into your ear in awe. “There’s our little girl.”
You felt your eyes welling up again, joy and relief flooding through you as you listened to your baby’s steady heartbeat. You turned your head to look at Tom, seeing the same emotions reflecting back at you. “Thank you,” you whispered, leaning in to kiss him. Somehow he knew just what you needed. The louder and steadier your baby’s heartbeat was, the more it drowned out Miles’ words. 
You felt completely at peace and able to drift off to sleep soon after, with Tom wrapped around you. Your baby was okay and she was going to be safe.
Perhaps Miles was right. Maybe you were kind of playing house with a “crazy fucker” as he claimed. But you’d take that crazy fucker over Miles anyday. That crazy fucker cared more about your child than he, the biological father, did. Tom cared about her, wanted her, and would do whatever it took to keep you both safe while Miles had threatened to hurt her, hurt you both. So yeah, you’d take the “crazy fucker” any day of the week.
<-->
A scream startled you awake. You sat up as best as you could, glancing around the dimly lit bedroom. You could see the first shafts of morning light peeking through the windows. You were alone in the bed. “Tom?” You called, scared when you didn’t see him. You didn’t know what you’d heard but you were frozen in terror.
Another pained scream erupted out of nowhere and it sounded like it was coming from outside. Miles’ words came back to you and you hurriedly got to your feet, realized you were nude (Tom must have taken your nightgown off to be skin on skin again; he liked that), and dressed. Your hair was still damp from your shower last night but you had no time to throw it up in a bun or ponytail. You felt sore and you noticed a few cuts on your fingers. The sight terrified you especially given how sore your body was and how you had woken up nude but Tom was nowhere to be found. Especially when you remembered Miles’ threats. “Tom?” You cried but you still got no answer. 
You made your way to the main room and gasped when you saw blood in the corner where Miles had been, partially covered by a sheet. You noticed there was blood spatter all over the walls, in almost every nook and cranny. Some of it had even landed on the table, the opposing wall, and the area of floor you were about to step on. “No. No!” You weren’t sure if you were more scared of Tom at this moment, or for him. You belatedly realized he must have overheard Miles threatening you and the baby last night and that was definitely why he brought out the fetal monitor to assure you. You’d had such a sweet moment with it; how did you go from that to this within a matter of hours?
You ran out the door, the screen door slamming back against the house. You didn’t see anything or anyone in the distance. You heard the screaming again and it seemed like it was coming from the surrounding woods to your right. 
“Tom!” You screamed. 
You ran back inside, looking for anything you could use as a weapon, maneuvering as best you could with your stomach but not finding anything, and hurried back out to the porch. You had to stop Tom. Miles had been horrific to you and didn’t deserve your intervention but you couldn’t let this happen to him. He was a human being, a horrible disgusting human being, but a human being nonetheless. You were about to hurry down the stairs when a bloody Tom appeared in front of you, a pickaxe in his hand. 
You froze, unsure if you should run back inside or if that would even make a difference. You held a hand over your mouth and your eyes filled with tears when you noticed something hanging from one side of the pickaxe’s blade that looked suspiciously organ-like.
He came to a stop in front of you, near the bottom of the stairs, and you felt like you couldn’t breathe. “Is it the baby?” He asked worriedly, panting. 
You shook your head, biting your lip to keep from yelling in terror. You couldn’t keep the tears from spilling down your face, though. 
He saw and his brows drew together until realization dawned upon his face. He dropped the pickaxe to the ground and spoke gently. “I’m okay, sweetheart. This isn’t my blood.”
Tom actually thought you were worried about him, that somehow Miles had gotten a hold of him like he’d threatened and was doing horrific, unspeakable things to him. A voice deep down told you to play along. “Will you please come inside then and let me clean you up?” You fought hard to keep the wobble out of your voice.
His eyes softened and he climbed the stairs to stand before you. The sight of so much blood made you want to vomit. You weren’t squeamish by any means but the amount of blood covering Tom from head to toe… If Miles wasn’t dead already, he soon would be. 
Tom went to reach out a hand to your cheek but then saw the blood and thought better of it, dropping it to his side. 
“Y-You promised,” you forced out.
“I did.”
“Why then? W-Why did you break it? We were…we were doing so well,” you sobbed out.
His jaw tightened but his eyes saddened. “We still are. Let me go finish…that. I’ll come back, clean up, and then we’ll talk.” He said it as if he was simply going to finish chopping firewood and then come back for lunch. 
“Tom,” you gasped, trying to breathe through the sobs tearing out of you. “If you continue ro torture him, I can’t be with you.”
His brows furrowed again and you waited for the terrifying expression you’d seen all too often to make a reappearance. Instead, he looked more confused than ever. “I’m not torturing him, Y/N.”
“Yes, you are. I heard him screaming.”
His lips parted in shock and he went to reach out for you again. This time, you flinched and moved backwards on reflex. He dropped his hand and curled it into a fist. You were scared that you angered him but God, how could you live with yourself if you let him go continue killing Miles slowly and brutally? 
“Sweetheart,” he spoke gently. “No one was screaming. Except you.”
“I know what I heard, Tom!” Was he seriously trying to gaslight you right now into believing you had been hearing things? The bloody pickaxe was still on the ground, with whatever attached it, for crying out loud. “It woke me up!”
His eyes softened then. “Miles was dead before I dragged him out here. You saw…inside…no one could have survived that.”
You felt like your heart stopped. The way he talked about murdering another human being so casually made your blood run cold. 
He took another step closer and you took another step backwards. He held out a placating hand but all you could see was the blood caked on his skin. “Y/N, look at me.” You lifted your gaze to his and only then did you notice how badly you were shaking. “I need you to take some deep breaths and relax.”
“Relax?” You laughed. “Are you kidding me?”
“You need to stay calm for the baby.”
You huffed out a snort in disbelief but after a moment, you realized he was right. The last thing you needed right now was for labor to start early or for there to be any complications when you were this remote. You forced yourself to take deep breaths. 
“Good.” He gave you a tiny smile. “Now, I need you to listen to me.”
You focused on your breathing, not wanting to listen to him but you had no choice.
“I need you to go inside and pack your things. There’s a bag under the bed you can put your clothes and the baby’s clothes in. When I’m done, I’ll come in, clean myself up, and get the rest of what we’ll need.”
Your jaw dropped. “You’re taking me somewhere else? Are you serious?” You felt like your mind was unraveling. “What about— What about the nursery?” You could care less about the nursery right now but it was what your mind grasped onto, trying to make sense of everything that was happening. 
“We’ll take most of it with us. Don’t worry. I can recreate it in the new place. Quickly, too, before she comes.”
“Another remote cabin?” You snapped.
He shook his head. “A home. For us, for our family. There’s a swingset in the backyard and everything.”
You narrowed your eyes at him. “Just how long have you been planning this? First this cabin? Now a house? How long, Tom?” You demanded.
He seemed unsure how to answer but he said, “As long as I’ve had to. Now, please, go inside and pack. If you hear anything, just know I’m okay and he’s already dead. Alright?”
You kept focusing on your breathing, not answering him.
“I promise I’ll explain everything once we’re on the road.”
The road? Depending on which road he planned to take, there may be other cars on that road, places he needed to pull over for gas — people. You could possibly flag someone down for help or even make an escape attempt that might be successful. The road was good. It meant opportunity. 
You took another deep breath and nodded, opening the screen door and walking inside, refusing to look back at Tom or the massacre-decorated corner of the main room. 
<-->
You had packed everything Tom had told you to: your clothes, the baby clothes, your book, any necessities. After a while, Tom had come back, spent a few hours attempting to clean the blood from the main room which he urged you to keep the bedroom door shut for with the bedroom window open in case, jumped in the shower, and then urged you out the door. He packed everything else up into his truck. He’d even disassembled the crib and tied the rocking chair down securely in the truck bed. The changing table was being left behind as well as the cubbies he’d stored the books and toys in but everything else came with. He also managed to quickly pack a cooler of food and drinks, and took whatever he could from the cupboards. It was an odd sensation, standing by the truck as he did all of this, not offering to help. A part of you wanted to but the other part was still angry with him for killing Miles and breaking his promise to you. Another third smaller part was scared to death that you were about to share the same fate, or at least you would once the baby was born. Tom wanted your baby; that was crystal clear to you now as you noticed the larger percentage of what was packed had more to do with the baby than anything else. While he had told you he wanted you all to be a family, perhaps he was just waiting for you to give birth and then that would be it. For you.
You focused on maintaining your breathing and told yourself you would get away long before that could happen. 
Once everything was packed up and the cabin was closed up, Tom opened the passenger door for you and helped you up into the seat. You wouldn’t have accepted his help if you thought you could get up there yourself but a very big belly tended to offset everything. He got into the driver seat, slipped a baseball cap on, and pulled away from what had been your temporary home for a few weeks. 
It was about fifteen miles on the highway or so, with nary a car in sight, that you finally turned to Tom (who you had been ignoring this entire ride so far) and asked the question that had been sitting in the back of your brain. “You heard him last night, didn’t you?”
Tom turned a confused expression onto you. 
“When he threatened me.”
His eyes hardened and his jaw clenched, turning back to the road ahead. “No. I didn’t. I knew he had probably said something to upset you but I didn’t know he did that. Had I, I would’ve…” He shook his head, angry, clenching a fist. “Makes sense, though.”
“What makes sense?”
He nervously licked his lips and reached over to pick up your hand. You went to yank it back but he tightened his grip and placed a kiss to your skin. “I promised I would tell you everything and I will.”
“Now seems like a good a time as any,” you seethed, still trying to pull your hand back but he wouldn’t let you.
“Let’s get some driving out of the way first. We’ve got a ways to go and I’d rather we put as much distance as we can between us and that cabin.”
“Yeah, I bet,” you muttered. 
He seemed displeased with your reaction but he let your hand go and continued focusing on the road. And for the first time since this whole thing started, you couldn’t be bothered to give a damn. That worried you a bit because you should be trying to keep him happy, calm, trusting, and instead you were doing the exact opposite. But the anger and betrayal you felt seemed to be overriding everything at the moment.
<-->
“Hey. Y/N.”
You were being gently shaken awake and you opened your eyes, glancing all around you. You were still in the front seat of the truck and the sun was starting to go down. You turned to see Tom rubbing your shoulder. 
“You need to use the bathroom, sweetheart?” He murmured. 
Almost as if on cue, your bladder started to hurt. You nodded, rubbing your eyes. 
“Okay.” 
He jumped out of the truck and made his way over to your side. He opened your door and lifted you to the ground, grunting in the effort. Had he been someone else, you would’ve felt bad for the strain he was putting on his body in doing so. 
You were at a rest stop where other cars surrounded you. You saw families milling about, couples, friends traveling together — people.
He grabbed your hand and gripped it tightly. “Stay close to me.” Of course he wanted you to stay close to him. He didn’t want you running off for help after all.
You let him lead you into the building as you tried to formulate a plan to escape him. He held you closer as he pushed his way through people waiting in line for the various food vendors available and brought you to the women’s bathroom. Thankfully, there was no line. You were just waiting to get in there and lock the door behind you. But as luck would have it, he opened the door himself and ducked his head in. When he determined it was clear, he urged you in ahead of him and locked you both inside.
“I’ll be right here if you need me.”
You glared at him and went to find a stall, realizing he’d already anticipated your plan. When you found one, you relieved the pangs of your bladder and tried to think of a new plan. You heard him checking the other stalls around you as a precaution. 
Technically, there were a lot of people around. If you screamed in the middle of the crowd, he couldn’t do anything about it. You smiled to yourself. Yeah, you liked that plan.
You finished doing what you needed to do and exited the stall to wash your hands. While you were drying them, arms came around you, a hand tenderly placed against your belly, and you heard Tom whisper in your ear, “I love you. I love both of you. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost either of you.” He pressed a kiss to your cheek. “I’m sorry I didn’t know what he said. If I had, maybe I could’ve done something to keep this morning from happening.”
You refused to look at him, in the mirror or next to you. Too little, too late. “You broke your promise to me, Tom.”
“I didn’t break my promise to you, sweetheart.”
“Really?” You spun around, glaring up at him. “And what do you call this morning? Look, Miles was a despicable human being who did the most horrific things to me a long time ago and threatened to do even more horrific things if he got loose, but he was still a human being. You know what? It’s not even about him. I didn’t even ask you not to kill him for him, I asked you not to kill him for me. Not because I cared in the slightest what happened to him, but because I can’t be with someone who just goes around killing people because they can! I have a baby to think about, Tom! What if she cries too loudly or she doesn’t put her toys away when we tell her to? What then?”
With each word you said, he looked more and more pained. “I’m going to be a good father to her, Y/N. I’m really doing the best I can to keep…certain impulses in control. It’s not easy. Even when there are certain risky things going on that are tempting those impulses.”
“What?” What was he talking about?
“I didn’t want to have this conversation until we got to the house but if you need to hear it now so you know how much I love you and the baby, then so be it. Y/N, I—”
A loud pounding sounded on the door. “The door’s locked!” Some woman yelled. 
“Shit,” he muttered before turning to look down at you pleadingly. “Look, I get that you can walk out that door, scream for help, I would have to run, and then you’d never see me again. But Christ, Y/N, I’m asking you to please give me a chance to explain. Just one. If you don’t want to be with me after that or allow me to be her dad,” He swallowed compulsively at that part. “Then you two can stay in the new house and I’ll move on. I promise.”
“Hey, some of us have to go to the bathroom, too! Open up!”
You gritted your teeth and glanced up at him skeptically. “Another promise?”
 “I haven’t broken the last one I made to you yet.”
You shot him a look. 
“Open up or we’re going to report you!”
“Report me to who?” You snapped at the door. “The bathroom police? Please.” You turned back to Tom who was smirking down at you. “What?”
He only smirked wider and offered you his hand. You realized you must definitely be nuts because after a moment, you took it. He leaned down to kiss your nose, whispering, “Thank you.”
A second later, he gripped your hand tightly. “No matter what, we keep our heads down and just get back to the truck. Deal?”    
You gave him a hesitant nod and moved closer to his back, so he could break through the crowds for you both.  
He unlocked the door and opened it, rushing past a couple of women standing sentry at the door. The loud one yelled at you as you passed, “Really? That’s what we were waiting on? Disgusting! I should report you both!”
You had the strongest urge to yell something back but Tom squeezed your hand and hurried out of there, ignoring any onlookers. 
You were just about to step into the parking lot when you heard a feminine giggle to your right. You glanced over and saw a young woman flirting with a young guy. She was touching his jaw with the tip of her finger, and he was smirking down at her.  
She giggled again and the images in front of you began to swim. Suddenly, another image overtook it. 
You were back in your house, at the top of the stairs, watching as your friend Cindy was all smiles at Tom. He was coming down off of the ladder from installing the light at the top of the foyer. He gave her a polite smile and when she asked where you were, he said you were upstairs resting, the baby had been really active that morning.
Cindy watched as he wiped his hands on a rag and she sidled up to him. “Tom, what are you doing? Playing house with the new weird pregnant girl who won’t tell anyone where she’s from, and stepping in as Daddy? It doesn’t suit you. You’re young and strong and full of life. Don’t let her suck it out of you.” Your grip on the railing tightened.
Tom had politely pushed her away. “I love her, Cindy. I love them both. They’re my life. Now, if you can’t accept that or even speak nicely about her in her own home, then I think it’s time for you to leave.” He gestured towards the door.
Cindy tried once more. “But, Tom, we had some fun times together, didn’t we? Wouldn’t you prefer that to whatever this is?” She gestured around the foyer in disgust.
“Yes, we did. And no, I don’t. Like I told you at the Christmas party, I’m not interested. So, please leave.”
“Ugh, fine. Call me when you get bored of the fake family routine.” She was walking towards the door finally. You could see Tom’s jaw tighten as he watched her go, his hands clenched in fists at his sides.
You quietly hurried down to the last few steps, plastering a big smile on your face. “Cindy, is that you?”
Tom’s gaze snapped over to you and Cindy spun on her heel with the biggest fake smile. “Y/N! I was just asking after you. Tom told me you were getting some rest so I figured I’d drop by later to see how you were doing.”
You made your way down the stairs, Tom holding out a hand to help you. You gave him a smile of thanks and laid a hand on your belly, rubbing. “Yeah, she was being a little overactive this morning and tired Mommy out.” You then placed your hands on your belly as if you were blocking the baby’s ears. “Usually happens after a great night of sex,” you said in a more conspiratorial tone.
Tom grinned down at you. “Damn right it does.” He pulled you to him, kissing you.
You chuckled against his lips, playfully pushing away from him, your cheeks warm. “Tom, we have company.” You inclined your head in Cindy’s direction who still had the fake smile going. 
Tom shrugged. “She was just leaving.” He leaned in to kiss you again when you laughed and turned to let him kiss your cheek instead. 
“Oh my word, you two are just too cute together. Like a Christmas card without all of the…Christmas,” Cindy let out in a laugh.
Tom moved and slipped his arms around you from behind, pressing kisses to your cheek as he rubbed at your belly. 
“So, Cindy, what did you drop by for?” You asked, playfully slapping at Tom’s hand that was subtly moving above your belly. He snickered into your ear before nibbling on it.
“You know what, you seem a little busy right now, hun. I’ll drop by later so we can talk.”
You gave her a bright smile. “That’d be great. I’ll put coffee on for you and tea for me, and we’ll chat then.”
“Absolutely! See you then!” She wiggled her fingers in a goodbye and then was out the door.
Your smile dropped as soon as the door closed. Tom saw and placed his lips at your ear. “I take it you heard all of that before you came down?”
You turned a stone cold expression on him. 
He sighed and laid his forehead against yours. “I love you and want to be with you. Only you. You know that.”
“But you’ve been with her?”
“It was only a couple of times, purely casual. It was done before you even came to town.”
You gripped his chin tightly. “Are you sure you want to give up fun times together and play Daddy?”
His brows drew together, studying you. “Yes. Sweetheart, if I didn’t want to, I wouldn’t be here.” 
Your expression softened and you released him. “You mean that?” You whispered.
He gave you a soft smile and kissed you. “We could be up in the mountains somewhere, just the three of us, and I’d be happy. So, yes, sweetheart, I mean it. We’re a family and nothing is going to threaten that. I promise.”
You hugged his arms around you and leaned back against him, relaxing and smiling. You really had no idea what you had done to deserve Tom coming into your life when he did. 
Which is why you were so desperate to keep him with you, to keep your family together. When Cindy walked into your kitchen a few hours later, you were determined to lay down the law. To let her know that you overheard her earlier and while you appreciated her helping you find this house (and Tom by extension), she was no longer welcome in it. Instead, though, she ended up dead. She made a comment to you about Tom that was heavy with implication and before you knew it, you attacked her. Multiple stab wounds to the body after a smashed coffee pot over her head that caused third-degree burns. She just wouldn’t stop screaming.
Tom arrived back from a trip to the store and found you in the kitchen, still stabbing her long after she finally stopped screaming, his eyes wide. He wrestled you for the knife and tossed it before gripping your face and staring into your eyes. “Y/N, it’s me! Look at me! Y/N!”
You both heard your backdoor opening, and in walked your estranged husband who you had been running from. Miles’ eyes were wide as he took in the bloody scene in front of him and he whistled, chuckling. “Always knew you were a crazy whore.” Tom immediately recognized him from the picture you’d shown him and he let you go, fury filling his expression. 
Tom attacked him and they fought. Miles had somehow managed to best Tom at one point and he was about to go to town on him when you hit him with a frying pan. It gave Tom the opportunity he needed to get out from under him and before Miles could even try to attack you once he recovered, you held a knife to his throat as Tom grabbed another one, that same fury in his eyes.
“Ah, ah, ah,” you told Miles. “One move and you die.”
“You stupid bitch, I’ll fucking kill you,” he spit. You pressed the blade into his neck a little more. 
Tom rushed him, ready to kill him when you held a hand up, stopping him. “No. He lives.” Tom glared up at you, unsure of why you were stopping him. “We take him with us, make him watch and hear everything, and we have some fun.” You gave Tom a wicked smile and he returned it, turning it down onto Miles who was bleeding from where you’d cut him. “Do you know a place?” You asked Tom.
“Yeah.” He glanced once again at Miles, his smile widening. “I know a place.”
You were suddenly at the cabin, waking up in the middle of the night. Not caring if you were dressed or not, you slipped out of Tom’s arms and padded into the main room. You stood there, watching as Miles slept, or if he was awake like he was the night you and Tom had sex, you stood there with a knife, fucking with his head. Would you kill him? Would you not? You made sure to let him know the child you carried was biologically his but he would never see it born. Tom was its father now and he was much more of a man than Miles, as he must have heard earlier. There was even one night where Tom woke up and found you in the kitchen in the dark, holding a knife over your belly, as if you were going to stab yourself. He knocked the knife out of your hand and asked what you were doing. You said it was Miles’ child and you wanted Miles out of you. Tom held your face in his hands and assured you that the child was his and his alone.
“No, it’s not,” you murmured. 
“Yes, it is. Listen to me, that’s my little girl inside of you. She’s both of ours. He has nothing to do with it. Y/N, I don’t know if you can hear me, but you love this baby and you love me. You want our family to stay together. You told me that! Please! Don’t let her hurt our baby!”
“It’s our baby?” You asked in a tiny voice.
“Yes, sweetheart, it’s ours. Just ours.”
You allowed him to carry you to bed and hold you there, shushing you soothingly and rubbing your belly, using your hands with his.
And then came the night Miles threatened you. This time, you stood over him with the knife.
“You dumb whore, you don’t have it in you to kill me. You won’t even let your crazy boy toy do it.” 
“Yeah, because I want to be the one to do it.” A big smile spread across your face and you slashed at his cheek, making him curse.
“Go ahead then! Even if you kill me, you’ll never be rid of me. I’ll always be a part of you, inside you, in that kid. Know that, you stupid bitch. I should’ve fucking killed you when I had the chance!”
You started slicing and then forcefully stabbing and never really stopped. You took pieces off of him (including what could be construed as what he thought was his manhood) and he screamed, and screamed, and screamed. Tom woke up when the screaming started but you didn’t stop. He tried to get you to, telling you he would take care of the rest for you, that he didn’t want you to hurt yourself or the baby, but you told him no, you wanted to do this yourself. You’d earned it. Instead, he stood there, waiting, in case you needed him. He nervously watched as you took Miles apart, his eyes repeatedly flickering to your stomach. At one point, though, you could have sworn you noticed a faint smirk on Tom’s face when Miles screamed particularly loudly and his eyes were hard but proud. Only when you were done, though Miles had been dead for a while by this point, did you turn to go back to the room. Tom stopped you with a hand on your shoulder.
“Are you hurt?” You shook your head. “Our baby?” Another shake. He let out a huge sigh of relief. “Why don’t you go take a shower and then get into bed? I’ll clean this up.”
“Thanks, baby,” you’d whispered, gripping his face and lifting up on your toes to kiss him. You left Miles’ blood all over his cheeks but he still looked at you with that same reverence he always had. Once you were out of the shower, he was there to run clean hands over your belly, checking for any injuries but not finding any. You’d smiled and kissed him, not caring about the dried blood on his face when you’d crawled onto his lap and urged him to take off his shirt.
You saw more flashing Images of you in his lap, arching your head up in pleasure, him kissing down the column of your neck, some of the blood from his face transferring onto your skin.   
The screams and moans echoed in your ear as you came back to yourself. You felt as if you were losing your balance and you started to fall until Tom caught you in time.
“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?”
You shook your head, not looking at him, tears streaming down your face. 
“Hey, she alright, man?”
“You need me to call for an ambulance?”
“No,” Tom assured the onlookers. “Thank you but she’s fine. She has low blood sugar and this happens when she forgets to eat. Let me get her back to the car so I can give her a juice box. Thank you but she’s okay.”
He lifted you in his arms, grunting, and slowly began the trek to the truck. “I thought we had a deal, sweetheart. But you’re not getting rid of me that easily. I’m not gonna leave you or our little girl behind at a rest stop. Not happening.”
‘Tom, I… I killed them,” you sobbed, staring up at the sky. 
He stopped short for a second but then kept moving. “Shhh. Just hang on, sweetheart. We’re almost there.”
“I-I-I killed them.” You started to break apart. “I even threatened my baby.”
Tom picked up speed slightly and did his best to get you both back to the truck. Once there and he had you in the passenger seat, you were already hyperventilating. He gripped your face and forced you to meet his eyes. “Sweetheart, we need to get your breathing under control. Let’s slow it down together, okay?” He took your hand and placed it on his chest and he placed a hand on your chest. “Follow me.”
He eventually got you to calm down a little, taking nice deep and even breaths, but it wasn’t enough to make you forget what you had seen, what you had done. You thought back to what you had said to Tom. “I can’t be with someone who just goes around killing people because they can!” “If this is going to work with us, as a family…you can’t kill anymore people, Tom.” You’d blamed him for Cindy’s and Miles’ deaths!
“What do you say we go someplace and have that talk now?”
You nodded, more tears falling down your face at the action. He wiped your cheeks with his thumbs and kissed you before settling you into your seat. Within two minutes, you were back on the road again, his hand in yours, and you stared blankly out the window. You were a killer and Tom, even your own baby — they weren’t safe. 
<-->
“I’m so sorry, Tom.”
He turned an inquisitive gaze on you. 
“I blamed you when it was me.” You wiped a tear away. “I’m sorry.”
You both were sitting at a picnic table in a nice parking area off the shoulder of the highway that he had managed to find. Thankfully, no one was really around. The stars beginning to come out might have something to do with that. 
He took your hand in his and intertwined your fingers, kissing your skin. “I knew why you were saying it. You didn’t remember what you’d done. Truthfully, I didn’t want you to remember it.”
“It’s no excuse,” you choked out. “And my baby…” Your eyes welled up again. “Even she’s not safe with me.” 
He cupped your chin with his free hand and turned you to look at him. “Yes, she is. Your ex was the trigger. Now that he’s gone, that lessens the trigger.”
“But what if she looks like him? Or sounds like him? Or what if she does something like Cindy did and says something to trigger me? Or what if like I told you, she cries too loudly or doesn’t put her toys away? She’s not safe.” Your eyes hurt from how much crying you’d been doing, you were surprised there were any tears left, but there were. You cried over Cindy. Sure, you didn’t care for her after overhearing her that day and finding out she’d been with Tom, only teasing you about his supposed crush on you because she never thought he’d give you the time of day and it allowed her to tease and flirt with him as well. But she didn’t deserve to die over it and certainly not like that. You didn’t cry too much over Miles but what you’d done. No human life deserved to be taken the way you had taken his. But you cried the most over what you’d almost done to your baby, what it meant, and how you’d have to let her go once she was born — if she was born. 
“Listen to me, I’m going to keep you both safe, okay? Just like I promised.”
“And you,” you sobbed. “Why would you want to be with a murderer? A cold-blooded killer like me? What if I’d killed you? Or what if I do kill you? Tom, what I’ve done is bad enough but if I did something to you, I don’t think I’d ever come back from that. Or if I did something to my baby.”
He pulled you into his arms and you cried against his shirt. He moved in and gently nuzzled you despite the wetness and sniffling. “Because I know what it’s like.”
“What are you talking about, you know what’s like? Fearing going to sleep that you may not wake up from because your significant other might kill you? I know all too well what that’s like and I don’t want that for you.”
His jaw tightened but he shook his head, bumping his nose gently into yours. “No. I mean, I know what it’s like to have a trigger and not remember what I’ve done half the time, while leaving bodies trailing behind me.”
You hiccuped and pulled back to look at him. “What do you mean?”
He placed his forehead against yours. “Remember I never wanted to talk about my past?”
You nodded. “Yeah, you said it was too painful and I didn’t want to push.”
Tom let out a heavy sigh. “Yeah. But I’m going to tell you everything, even when you don’t want to hear certain parts. I don’t remember a lot but I’ll tell you what I can. And I’m only going to gloss over my trigger, not go into full detail. I’m sure it would be fine, but I don’t want to even risk it. Okay?” 
You took in a ragged inhale and buried your fingers into his shirt. “Okay.”
He smiled at you reassuringly and tenderly brushed hair out of your face. “Okay.”
<-->
Tom kept an eye on you while you slept, hugging onto his arm. Today was a big day for you in various ways and he wasn’t quite sure if you’d be triggered again.
He’d been completely honest with you, opening up to you about Harry and how trauma led to this other identity he had no control of. Truthfully, he’d been scared to even mention the name, afraid it would draw the other side of him out. During this whole time with you, from him finding you stabbing Cindy to death in your kitchen to now, he’d felt as if Harry was fighting to come to the surface and join in the fray. Of course, that was something the therapists he’d seen had told him wasn’t possible, but even burying Miles’ mutilated corpse and using the pickaxe again felt as if he were approaching a very dangerous line. 
At some point after Harmony, he wasn’t quite sure how long, but he was in control again and Harry was nowhere to be found. He had a healing bullet wound as well as other scrapes on his head and face. He knew he could never go back to Harmony or even be Tom Hanniger again (especially after one internet search on a library computer), so he was forced to become someone else: a different Tom. He probably should have changed his first name, too, but he already had another identity waiting in the wings to take over again, he didn’t want another one he needed to worry about becoming, too. Even if it was only for paperwork reasons.
He moved to a new small town, far away from his old life, and began again. He stayed mostly to himself, kept under the radar as much as he could. He was able to find work, doing small odd jobs at first, and then finding work in basically being a handyman of sorts. He had gotten to know the townspeople that way as well as the town itself. He’d even sought help from a local therapist in the next town over whose resume boasted they specialized in DID. There, the therapist was able to help him understand the disorder better than any doctors in the institution had. He learned about triggers, working to reduce switches (as they called it), and how to overall take control of his life in more ways than one. He had been doing much better and there were no instances where he felt like he was missing time or there was something on the edge of his memories that he couldn’t quite remember. 
And then he’d met you, completely by accident. He’d bumped into you in the hardware store, literally. You’d dropped what had been in your hands and seeing the slim curve of your stomach, he’d immediately crouched down to pick them up for you. He locked eyes with you and he could swear you were one of the prettiest girls he’d ever seen. He cleared his throat when he realized he’d been staring at you a little too long. He immediately apologized for bumping into you and you apologized, too. He noted what you had in your hand: spackle.
“If you don’t mind me asking, you’re not planning on doing any painting, are you?” 
You glanced at the container in your hands. “Oh, this? Oh no. I can’t.” You gestured to your stomach. “But I read on a forum online that spackling is okay.”
He arched a brow at you. “Forum online?”
Your cheeks turned adorably pink. “Yeah,” you defended. “As long as it doesn’t have high VOC’s I think it said, I should be fine. Plus, I plan to wear a mask and open all the windows, air it out properly.” 
“Uh huh,” he chuckled. At your frown, he held up a placating hand. “Sorry, I just…can’t your husband or boyfriend do that for you? So you don’t have to?”
Your cheeks turned red now. “Are you saying that I can’t do what they can?” You challenged.
“Nope. I’m implying that there are certain things you shouldn’t be doing while pregnant. That’s all.” You went to say something else but he cut you off. “I’m the local handyman, a fixer upper basically. If your other half is too busy, I can swing by and help you out.” 
“Oh.”
He handed you his card, noting no ring sitting on your finger. That answered that particular question. “My cell phone number’s on there so call me anytime, day or night, and I’ll come by. Are you new in town?”
You studied his card. “Is it that obvious?”
He chuckled and held out a hand. “I’m Tom.”
You took it, smiling, and shook it. “Y/N.” Not only did he suddenly love that name but he loved the feel of your soft skin against his. “Nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you, too.”
You ended up calling him two days later to ask him about the spackling and his rates. Ever since your conversation with him in the store, you couldn’t get what he said out of your head and now you were worried the online forum was wrong. What he didn’t tell you is that he couldn’t get your conversation with him out of his head, but for a whole other reason.
After an agreed rate over the phone (he’d given you a break, calling it the newcomer discount so you wouldn’t question it or feel badly), he stopped by your house and you showed him where you needed the spackling done. There was a large crack in one of the walls of the living room high up. He couldn’t imagine you on a ladder with a mask trying to get this crack spackled — more like he didn’t want to imagine it. Cindy had been there, shooting him flirtatious smiles every time you turned your back, which he ignored. Cindy had been fun a time or two but he wasn’t interested in anything more than that, something he’d already told her long before he met you. Besides, he’d trade twenty of those flirtatious smiles for one of your warm genuine ones anyday. He’d thought you very pretty in the store but now he knew he’d been wrong; you were beautiful. And living all alone in this big, old house. It seemed like a crime to him though he was a little happy that you were single. 
He got vibes early on that there was something in your past that you were running from. You were jumpy, slow to trust, and he could tell it took a little bit for you to feel comfortable with him alone in the house. He didn’t push and he appreciated your not pushing either when it came to his own past. But he liked being around you and he definitely liked you. It took some time but you eventually got to know one another and he was helping you slowly restore your home (mostly for free at this point, what he referred to as the friend rate which made you smile and shake your head, still insisting on paying him which he would refuse). You never talked about who the father of your baby was or where he might be, but it was obvious you were going about things on your own. He admired you for that and he loved watching you walk around, lovingly rubbing your bump that was getting bigger each week.
And then, on New Year’s Eve, after circling each other for months, you kissed him. From then on, he was yours. Even when you opened up to him about your past, all he wanted to do was protect you and the baby, be good to you, and be there for you both. He loved you well before he said it, which was after you had said it first because he hadn’t wanted you to feel any pressure whatsoever. Soon enough, you both had started talking about the future — particularly, the very near future. Tom wasn’t sure if he was ready to be a parent or if he’d even be a good one but he knew one thing: he loved you and your little girl very much. He’d do anything for you two and that was good enough for him.
Then came the day Cindy made the fatal mistake of setting you off. He still wasn’t sure if it was what Cindy said in the foyer or if she said something else to you when she came by later, but something caused you to snap. Tom had returned from the hardware store and had been shocked to find you covered in blood, violently stabbing the woman who appeared to already be dead. You weren’t a violent person by nature. You two hardly ever argued and if you did, it was resolved within minutes. He’d never seen you argue with anyone else. Even when you got moody occasionally, sure, he knew to tiptoe around you, but you didn’t even get mean. So he had no idea where the hell this had come from. But before he could get through to you to find out if you and the baby were okay, your piece of shit ex showed up. That had been the first night Tom had felt Harry swimming dangerously close to the surface, waiting to take over. No matter what any therapist said; he knew Harry was there, he could feel him, doing his best to take over though Tom fought it. If Harry took over, he would kill every living being in the room, and that Tom would not allow to happen. Especially not when you and the baby were in the same room.
Tom let you make the call on your ex (even though he didn’t completely understand it) and got you out of there. Later that night, when you passed out, he’d checked you for injuries as well as the baby. He didn’t find any except some shallow cuts to your arms. He gently cleaned them and he was determined to keep a close eye on you. When you finally came to the next day, he’d had no choice but to tie you up much like your ex to wait and see what you would do. He noticed you were you again though you were looking fearfully at him. He hated to see it but he also knew it could only mean one thing: you hadn’t remembered what you did. He didn’t need to be a therapist to realize that you might possibly have the same situation going on that he did. When you accused him of killing Cindy, it confirmed it, though he wondered how you knew she was dead. He chalked it up to you starting to switch back and seeing the carnage before he’d been able to get you out of that house.  
So while Tom wasn’t a fan of it, he dangerously walked the line between himself and who he knew Harry to be. Your ex got the worst of Harry’s qualities: the violence, the ruthlessness, and the fury. You got the lower end of a few displeased glares and the raised volume of his voice once or twice. He didn’t know what he was dealing with just yet, though he suspected, and he hoped if he kept you you, even if you were fearful of him, he’d be able to figure out how to help you.
He didn’t agree with keeping Miles alive, especially since Miles was a threat to you and your baby and he had also seen what you’d done to Cindy. It was better to take care of him before he became an even bigger problem. While Tom didn’t relish taking a life, and he didn’t want to wake up Harry, it was clear that Miles needed to go. It was obvious that he was a trigger for you.
While he had been confused at your claims of grogginess, it soon became clear why you were really tired. You’d worried Tom the nights he’d woken up in bed, alone, and found you either hovering over Miles, taunting him, or watching him sleep. You’d even insisted he sit Miles up from where he’d left him in the corner the first night so the asshole could watch and listen. Watch and listen to what Tom hadn’t been sure of but when you told him to make love to you the next night, to be loud while loving you, he got a pretty good idea on what the listen part was. The following morning, he realized you wanted Miles to watch what was happening before his very eyes: you were being well taken care of, you were creating a family, and you were loved. EVen though you didn’t remember it most days, he tried to do right by you — both of you. The other side of you hadn’t told him her name yet, but he was waiting for it. The switches were only too obvious now. 
You’d scared the hell out of him, though, the night he found you holding a knife over your stomach. He had already been assuring you that he loved your baby and you, that you would be a family, that your little girl was his. After that, he stepped it up while also hiding all of the sharp objects and anything that could be used as a weapon against yourself (or him) all over the cabin. Each morning, you’d never remember these incidents, though you’d held clear conversations with him and sometimes your ex.
Then you’d brutally killed Miles that night, another night Harry had been simmering on the edge. As he watched you take your revenge, when you kissed him, covering him in blood, then making love to him — that had been the closest Harry had come to breaching the surface since the night Miles showed up in your kitchen. The only thing that kept Harry back, Tom believed, was the recurring thought of you and the baby. 
Miles being dead forced him to move up his timeline. He had this cabin for a while, only bringing you once to show you around, in case he had to ever grab you and run if your ex showed up (though he didn’t tell you that because he didn’t want to worry you). That was why he had replicated the nursery down to every single detail. You had worked so hard on that nursery, you were so excited when it was finished, that he hated for you to lose it should you have to run. So he slipped up to the cabin a couple of days a week when you weren’t with him, and worked on getting it set up. He had even stocked the kitchen in case (only buying perishables on your second trip up there when you were truly on the run). He’d also made sure to put a down payment on a small house some ways away in case you both needed a fresh start elsewhere. And that was where he was driving you now.
He’d meant what he said, if you wanted him gone, he would be, but he hoped you’d keep him with you. He was already worried about your breakdown from earlier today and your constant worry for your baby’s safety. Not to mention, your ex had been a cop. While they would most likely never find his body, they would associate his disappearance with you and you would always be sought after. And since Tom had disappeared with you, they’d either think you killed him as well or that he’d helped. So he’d alway be sought after as well. That had been one of the reasons he wanted to get out of Dodge as soon as possible but also, he wanted you as far from your main trigger as possible. And he also wanted to get you help, the same help he’d gotten (though he’d have to find another therapist now). Though he was pretty sure the baby was safe, like he kept assuring you, it wouldn’t hurt to get a second opinion, an official one. 
He glanced down at you, his eyes softening as he took you in. He loved you deeply and he wanted to be with you. He loved your baby and he wanted to be there for her, stepping in as her dad if you’d let him like you had both originally planned. You had one more month to go until the baby arrived. He hoped this new house, this new life he was bringing you to made you happy. He was going to set up the nursery again for you and this time you’d have a real living room and dining room. The kitchen wouldn’t be so cramped or outdated and you would have a nice, comfortable mattress to sleep on at night. It may not be what your old house was but he would still make it as nice as possible for you. Once he sorted out your paperwork through an old contact of his, you would have access to doctors, the hospital — whatever you needed. The house had a nice backyard for kids to run and play in and the swingset came with the deal which was nice. Tom had even checked to make sure it was in a good school district and a safe neighborhood.
You moved in your sleep, cuddling his arm more and murmuring something he couldn’t make out. He smiled down at you and leaned over to drop a kiss onto your head before glancing back at the road.  
He was going to take care of you. Both of you. And the baby. He would keep you all safe. Just like he’d promised.
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justsome-di · 1 year
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Now a Pulitzer Prize winning book (don’t fact check this, just trust me) and featured on Obama’s 2023 Summer Reading List!
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You should be reading Nobody Ends Up Dead in a Bathtub, Everyone Keeps Their Organs! Why? See above.
It’s a good story if I do say so myself. And if you read it, you’re a cool kid. Don’t you want to be a cool kid? This is something called peer pressure, and it usually works.
But for real, if you read Nobody Ends Up Dead then you’re going to go on a good adventure with good characters I guarantee you will love. Not to brag, but it is a pretty good story. There’s funny one-liners, a cute plot, and relatable characters that have been developed for years. Just heed warnings at the beginning of chapters. NEUD deals with some heavy topics such as eating disorders.
NEUD is officially all online for free. But you can still access bonus chapters and short stories on Patreon for only $4.
Links: 
AO3
Wattpad
Patreon (Patrons had early access to the whole novel and also get exclusive short stories with the characters and sneak peaks for new projects!)
Netflix Previews
Characters’ Playlists
You can also check out my carrd if there are any updates to how/where I post, it’ll probably be the most accurate place to find new or updated links.
Transcript under cut:
The Story is Dope
A New York office worker and a sex worker get set up on a date--one thinking it's a real blind date, the other under the impression it's an ordinary appointment. After realizing it was all a shitty prank, they set out for revenge. Their plan: show up to an upcoming Halloween office party as a genuine couple, convincing the pranksters they genuinely fell in love and refusing to let themselves become the butt of the joke.
Our main characters are Alex, an awkward admin assistant for a medical company who hasn't been on a date since he was a teenager, and Damián, a sex worker who seems way out of Alex's league but keeps insisting on spending time with him so they can perfect their revenge scheme.
The novel features a diverse cast and explores sex positivity. I also like to believe that it portrays sex work well. Damián is a hardworking man, doing what he loves, and meeting mostly great people along the way--but he also would benefit greatly if sex work was decriminalized and therefore had better resources at his disposal.
If you're looking for a story with LGBT characters that's mostly light-hearted but still packs a punch every few chapters, this is it! Overall, it's a happy story.
The Characters!
oh boy the characters!
we got Damián who's hardworking and doting on his lil bro but oh wow does he have some angst
we got Alex who is nothing more than a burning ball of anxiety trying his best--all too relatable
Leo, Damián's bro, is an ally, and he will make sure everyone knows. Also has angst.
Eve, Alex's lil sister, is an edgy teen who's failing calc and runs a queer book club
together, they're a weird lil dysfunctional family
I'll be honest. There's a lot of love in this story. From me and among the characters. The characters love each other, and I think the readers love them, too.
It touches on a lot of loneliness--inspired by how I've felt since Covid started--and a lot of the conflicting emotions that come with being gay. What happy endings do we deserve? What about happy middles?
It's a touching book about learning to be a better person and finding people who love you--platonically and romantically.
Here are some of my fave parts:
And then there was a streak of gray hair that shocked Alex. A streak of gray hair off to the side, nestled close to a salt and pepper beard. Textured hands held cocktails. Little, subtle lines creased when mouths laughed. Alex held his breath. On the packed floor, they were the only people Alex could see. They were laughing and holding each other and enjoying themselves, firmly in the place they knew they belonged. Flashes of teeth pressed against each other, disappearing for long seconds at a time.
--
“Sorry,” Alex said. “Your arm got heavy on top of me.” “You’re a little mouse of a man. I didn’t mean to crush you.” “I’m what?”
--
“A dog!” Damián cooed as he sat across from the lesbians. “His name is Yam,” Martin said.
“His name is Yam,” Damián cried. Kris and Clara released Yam and gently nudged him to Damián. Ecstatic, Damián picked him up and set him on his lap. “His name is Yam,” he repeated to Alex. “I heard.”
--
But he couldn’t deny that he was having a good time. It was like intense yoga with the perk of having a cock shoved up his ass. He was going to feel limber as fuck after.
--
“Can I do anything?” Alex asked. “To help cheer you up?”
“You don’t have to worry about me.”
“I’d like to. If you let me.”
--
“Wow this sounds great where can I read it?”
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blue-jisungs · 3 months
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RADIO SILENCE ,, chap 10 — i ate it
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synopsis. hwang y/n and park sunghoon do not like each other. end of story. god knows why (well actually, niki is the only one who knows why). but when they’re put as co-hosts on a radio show, they’re bound to bond.
˗ˏˋ꒰ 🎙️ ꒱ main masterlist
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niki’s gaze flickered between you and sunghoon, sharing a laugh because of a bad joke the older one just said.
he smiled and when you looked at him, brows furrowing, he just shrugged.
“i’m glad you two made up. i missed you or whatever…” he mumbled quietly, taking a bite of your tteokbbeoki
“i missed you too, kid. i’m sorry it resulted in us growing apart, you weren’t even involved” you sighed and sent him a reassuring smile.
“well, it’s sunghoon’s fault though. he told me it’s the best we didn’t talk for a while and it just…” he stopped in his tracks, looking cautiously at his older friend.
you sighed.
“it would be awkward, i know. but… it’s all in the past, right? let’s just hang out like we used to” you hummed and saw with a corner of your eye that someone is approaching your table. sunghoon must have seen it too since he tensed up “besides, we need to catch up. i need to beat your ass in mario kart and fifa since you probably haven’t played with anyone who could be as good as me”
“did anyone ever tell you that you’re painfully humble?” niki laughed.
finally, the person approached you. it was some guy – quite handsome if you had to be honest – and his eyes were solely focused on you.
“hi, um” he started, sending you a sweet smile “i was grabbing some food and noticed you… and i just need to say that you’re like, gorgeous”
your eyes widened, looking in shock at sunghoon. his jaw tensed, eyes trained on the stranger.
“you seem familiar as well… that’s besides the point. which is… well, here’s my number if–“ he started and before he could slip a tissue with his number written on it, you suddenly felt sunghoon’s toned arm around yours. the guy gulped “–you’re interested. i’m dusik by the way…”
“thank you, dusik. i–“ you started and before you could grab the piece of paper, sunghoon took it and hid it into his pocket.
not a word was said but the eye contact between dusik and sunghoon spoke volumes.
“um, so. yeah… that’s all i wanted to say. have a good day…” he smiled awkwardly.
“you too!” you grinned and watched him walk away. he turned around once or twice and when he was gone, you slapped sunghoon’s hand.
“dude, what was that about?! we could get in trouble!” riki was faster than you, aggressively poking his friend’s leg.
“he just seemed sketchy, that’s all” sunghoon grunted, taking his arm off you.
“that’s ridiculous, he was very sweet” you hummed, shaking your head “quite awkward but cute”
“so that’s your type, huh” riki teased, eyes flickering between you and sunghoon. the other one just smiled playfully while your cheeks reddened.
“whatever. you can give me back the tissue, i’d love to call him” you teased, reaching your hand out
“i don’t have it” he shrugged, avoiding eye contact
“wha- you had it like, moment ago” you grunted, sending niki an amused look.
“i ate it. no stranger’s numbers for you” your ex-boyfriend huffed and using the opportunity of you being taken aback, he ate the last piece of your tteokbbeoki.
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taglist. @primoppang ,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @slytherinshua ,, @kazmura ,, @nicholasluvbot ,, @weird-bookworm ,, @dazzlingligth ,, @w3bqrl ,, @ocean-minho ,, @s-e-s-a-l-e-n-e ,, @eternalgyu ,, @haecien ,, @yenqa ,, @eneiyri ,, @aaasia111 ,, @catecita ,, @jebetwo ,, @rubywonu ,, @jiawji ,, @jeongintwt ,, @seunnimg ,, @isawritesss ,, @splat00z ,, @ilovejeongin007 ,, @sasfransisco ,, @saythenameseventeen178 ,, @hyuzaa ,, @flmtunes
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its-a-me-mango · 9 days
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Hi I've had several people ask me for my opinions on the movie so instead of answering them all individually, I'll give my honest opinion here. (There's a few focused one I'll answer but this is just my general feel for it)
Ok so, I'll be honest, not my favourite SMG4 movie, don't get me wrong I still enjoyed it, I enjoyed it a lot, but as a few people said, it felt more like a long SMG4 episode than a movie. I think if you see it like that then a lot of the flaws with it kinda melt away, at least to me lol.
We know the team can do absolute bangers (Western Spaghetti is still my favourite SMG4 movie you can fight me on it), I think they just missed the mark a bit this one, especially for someone as important as Mr Puzzles. You'd think if this was a finale to him they'd maybe, I dunno, show him more? It's hard for me to say personally what I would do differently, but I think what they did wasn't the best for him. I'm hoping he shows up again maybe, that'd be nice and would make the movie feel less anticlimactic for me and probably a few others.
Then again we've seen him non stop for like a month so I don't feel like complaining too much lol.
The gags though were super fucking funny and that's what I love most about SMG4, I ultimately don't care if the story is lacking, as long as I'm having a good time then the story can do whatever the hell it wants. I'm not a South Park fan AT ALL and even I was crackling at the South Park skit. The references and jokes, the live action bit, MEAT MALLET?! It's stupid shit like that that makes me love watching SMG4.
I do genuinely think a lot of you would be happier if you took SMG4 less seriously, no offence to any of course it's fun to take silly shitpost shows seriously, but at the end of the day they are shitpost shows, they're meant to be stupid and make dumb jokes, again this felt way more like an SMG4 episode than a movie and I'm fine with that.
Anyone saying SMG4 fell off or were horrifically let down or something like that is being silly, you can say you didn't vibe with the movie it's ok, subdue your expectations and watch Bob make a pickle rick joke with me, you'll understand my vision then.
I get the impression they wanted the movie to be more silly and stuff instead of serious like previous movies, Mr Puzzle is a villain yes but he's a horrifically cartoonish one. His main goal was to control the world though the TV or something like that, like compare that to Wren's goal, there's a clear difference in tone between the both of them.
Regards, I still enjoyed the movie, yes it was a bit over hyped but it wasn't a total letdown for me, it gave us Mr Puzzle characterisation which is nice, again it was REALLY funny, and I always love to the see the team try new and silly ideas! I hope they do more weird and wacky stuff like this in the future because you can tell the team was having fun with this! That's more important to me than anything else.
Also that song was an absolute BANGER, certified bop!!!!! 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥
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selfindulgentpixies · 4 months
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The hands that hold you chp 10.2: let me in/tell me how you hurt
Master list Oh my goodness I feel like i'm finally hitting my stride again and like i really do have my muse back for this story. It went into hiding a bit after the end of september but given time and encouragement from people reading my story I think we're back in action. These events follow Satoru's birthday by a few months. (i'll probably do one shot type snippets for other events that happen in the time in between like Suguru's birthday) but we're back to the main story! I really enjoyed writing this chapter if i'm honest. CW: Satoru gojo x reader x suguru geto, GN!reader (reader only uses they/them pronouns), reader is afab but it's not really a big thing this chapter, Reader is a foreigner who was adopted by Yaga, reader has a CT (it's plot relevant), Suguru is depressed and struggling. wc. 3.6k
“Sugu?” 
Silence. 
“Suguru?” You try again a note of pleading to your voice. “I know you’re in there… I recognize your cursed energy like it’s my own.” You rest your forehead against Suguru’s locked dorm room door. Hating how as the weeks had passed he’d begun to close himself off more. Satoru had become increasingly busy. Admittedly you’d all been getting more busy, but between his training and the increase in missions? It was hard to compare. And Suguru had been alone more and more while you’d been sent on missions with Nanami and Haibara since not only were they in your year but it turned out you worked well with them, especially well with Nanami. 
“Suguru please don’t shut me out.. I’m getting worried about you. More than that I miss you.” 
There's the sound of shifting cloth on the other side of the closed door followed by near silent footsteps before the click of a lock and the  door sliding open. You let yourself fall against Suguru’s chest and wrap your arms tightly around his waist. He lets out a surprised exhale and wraps an arm around your shoulders while the other hangs limp at his side. “You’re such a clingy lil thing you know that?” 
You snort before craning your neck to look at him. “Yeah. With you I am.” 
Suguru’s dulled eyes flash with surprise as they meet your shining ones. You’re not looking at him but instead it feels as if you’re looking into him. He shouldn’t be surprised though… it was on some level why he was trying to avoid you.  “You shouldn’t be. There are better people for you to spend your time with.” A better person, he doesn’t say.
You frown deeply at him and push him backwards further into the room. He allows it. Once you make the backs of his knees hit his bed he sits on it with a bounce. “Just stay here.” 
“What am I a dog?”
“You’re stinky, that's what you are.”  
Ignoring the little incredulous sound he makes you go to his door to close it before rummaging for clean clothes for him and tossing them onto the bed next to him. “I don’t suppose I can convince you to go take a shower? Even just rinse off?” 
He wrinkles his nose and sighs and it’s the most energy you think he’s put into an expression in days. 
“Please?” You cajole, walking over, placing your hands on his knees as you look at him. “I’ll dry and brush your hair after.”
The dull look he gives you tells you he’s far from convinced. Chewing at your lower lip you hope you won’t regret what you suggest next. “What if I wash your hair for you?” 
Now that gets his attention and you feel your face heat up. “Don’t get any ideas! I just want to make sure you’re taken care of.” You glance away from him. “Normally you take really good care of yourself but lately you just haven’t been and i’m getting worried…” you trail off and then feel his arms hug around your middle and his head rest against your chest.  
“’m sorry.” The words are muffled into the fabric of your shirt but you hear them clearly enough. You comb your fingers through his lank hair, catching on tangles and then working through them. 
“You don’t gotta apologize. Just.. let’s get you cleaned up yeah? Why don’t you head down to the showers and i’ll meet you there.” You go to step back but he doesn’t release you. 
“You know Yaga-sensei will expel me if he finds out.”
You snort. “As if we’ll be caught. Besides he’d be crazy to expel one of the best prodigies this school has ever had. “
“Parents are crazy.” He finally allows you to step back from him and you roll your eyes so he can see. 
“Chances of anyone at all catching us are low. Now shoo. I’m gonna go get some stuff and i’ll meet you there.” and without waiting you leave the room. He wonders what you’re getting, wonders if he’ll get to see all of you since even with how much time you spent with him and Satoru you’d always been especially shy and they never push you. He sighs and gathers up the clothes you’d set out for him along with a towel. 
Suguru would be lying if he didn’t say he was at least a little disappointed when you show up to the showers already wearing a white bathrobe you clearly plan to keep on. You’re glancing everywhere but him even though he’s kept a towel slung over his hips as he sits on the tiled floor. There’s no way you could help him wash his hair if he were standing. 
“You sure about this? You look like you’re gonna run away at any second,” and you can tell he’s teasing despite his tired tone by the little curl of his lips.
Huffing you finally look at him, focusing on his face while walking forward, your feet padding across the cool tiles. Suguru had turned on the water a little before you’d arrived so the floor warms slightly as you approach. He’s sitting just at the edge of the spray so you don’t have to get hit with more water than needed. Setting a familiar shower caddy on the floor you lower yourself to your knees at his side, uncaring of how the robe gets soaked where it touches the floor and where your shoulder is closest to the warm spray. You press against his shoulder. “Come on, lean back and get your hair wet.” 
Suguru complies without complaint and leans back, soaking his hair. It’s a quiet process for a while after that. You working up a lather in his hair and washing away the grime that had settled there, which turns into slowly washing his neck and shoulders after you put conditioner in his hair. He lets you maneuver him however you need. It startles you when he finally does speak. 
“You know Satoru will be awfully jealous when he finds out.” He glances back at you, his lips half quirked with amusement.
You scoff. “Don’t give him any ideas. I don’t want him going nearly a week without a proper shower.” It’s only kind of a joke. 
“Was it really that long?” Suguru asks genuinely, causing you to frown.
“Yeah. This past week you’ve hardly even gone through the motions, Suguru..” 
He doesn’t respond, seemingly lost in his head again. You finish washing his back before rising from your knees with a slight wince. You’re sure if you looked at them there would be impressions from the tiles pressed into the skin. “Rinse yourself off and I’ll meet you back in your room, yeah? I’ll blow dry your hair for you. You tuck a bit of conditioner soaked hair behind his ear, watching his face to make sure he’s heard you. His eyes focus on you.  He nods and you wish you knew what exactly he was thinking.
You’re laying in Suguru’s bed, dressed in a dry pair of pajamas when he gets back. He’s wearing the sweat pants and tshirt you’d picked out for him. His hair falls down his back soaking the fabric. He’s clean though and for that you’re glad. You sit up and swing your legs over the side of the bed, your legs spread for him to sit between. Everything you need to take care of his hair is already out. You smile at him warmly and make grabby hands at him. 
Sighing but unable to stop a slight smile he walks over to sit in front of you. There’s not much room for talking over the sounds of the blow dryer but you think that’s okay. Suguru hasn’t been the most chatty anyway.  But as you click off the blow dryer and run your finger through his soft and clean hair he surprises you. 
“Why are you going to all this trouble? “ He doesn’t look at you but his voice is oddly tight. 
Setting aside the blow dryer you wrap your arms around his shoulders and press your face into his hair, breathing in the scent of him. “Isn’t it obvious?” Your heart hammers in your chest and you don’t give him a chance to say anything. “I love you, that’s why.” 
You both feel and hear his breath hitch, his hands come up to cover your own and he curls himself forward around your arms that you’ve wrapped around him. You’ve said it without words so many times over the months since you'd begun dating him and Satoru but never had you directly given voice to it until now. He doesn’t say it back now, but you know he does by the way his shoulders shake as he clings to your arms. You know he feels the same when you feel something warm and wet fall onto your arm. 
____
How. How was this possible? You stand in the Tomb of the Star, dazed and more than a little confused. How’d you get here? Why are you here? There are smears of blood on the ground and the stone work is cold beneath your feet. Stumbling back, panic thrums through your veins. Looking around frantically you call out. “S-suguru? Are you here?” Your voice comes out weak and small. You turn in a circle looking about the chamber, praying that you’d at least sense him or catch sight of one of his curses but there’s no sign of him here with you. Why are you here alone? You never wanted to be in this place again. You turn heel and head toward the exit. You feel sick as you go through what feels like endless corridors, all a blur, you fight to not look at the smear of blood outside the elevator Why hasn’t anyone cleaned anything up?
Stepping into the elevator, its slow rise feels like agony. The rattling of the metal cage grates against your nerves making you fingers twitch but once it stops… that’s so much worse. Everything is so quiet. Far too quiet as you step from the elevator to somehow find yourself somewhere that your brain struggles to process. Just outside the doors, despite the impossibility of it, is the crater Satoru had created that day months ago and it’s so much worse in it’s own way. The buzzing of thousands of flyheads is absent and yet the silence makes you feel sick, the only sound is your stumbling steps and ragged breathing as you make your way through the cracked earth and stone. Ignoring how you must scrape your hands and knees as you scramble up to the raised center of the crater. A stage to display one of your worst fears.
‘Satoru-’ you want to call out the name of the still figure but no sound passes your lips. You can’t seem to urge yourself to your feet and instead crawl to him. No this isn’t right. He shouldn’t still be here. When you reach him you pull your body close to his so you can hold his face. His normally vibrant eyes stare up at you blankly, dully, and missing all that spark you’ve come to treasure.
A shadow falls over you and a deep voice sends a nauseating spike of fear through you. “I told you it wouldn’t make a difference.” 
When you shakily sit up to look you’re suddenly lifted by your hair, your arms refuse to listen to you despite you screaming at yourself to fight back and when your eyes roll to look at them they’re horrifyingly twisted. His fist crushes into your abdomen. 
You let out  a choked scream and when you hit the ground it cuts off as the air is forced from your lungs. Things are… sharper now as you flail in the dark realizing you're tangled up- tangled up in your blanket. Eventually chest heaving you free yourself from your fabric confines. You look at your shaking hands in the mostly dark room, the only light coming from the early spring moon outside your window. Your arms are whole now, of course they are.
You shakily get to your feet and grab for your phone. Looking at the time it’s a bit after 3am. Both far too late and too early for you to be awake. You stumble from your room, clad only in your pj’s and your blanket wrapped around your shoulders, you barely bother to close the door behind you. Cool air hits the tear tracks on your cheeks as you stumble toward Satoru’s room. Both Suguru and Satoru are supposed to be out on solo missions, Suguru having left early the previous morning and Satoru having left a few days ago. You’re not fully thinking as you stumble your way through the halls but you can’t bring yourself to stay in your lonely room. Satoru’s dead eyes keep flashing in your mind with each blink. Your lip wobbles as you reach his door and shove it open, glad that it’s unlocked as you stumble in and make your way to his unmade bed and only partially closing the door in your single minded focus. You crawl into it letting your own blanket fall to the floor as you curl up under his and bury your face into his pillow. Each panicked breath pulls him into your lungs.
It’s a far cry from the comfort of actually having him here but being able to breathe in his scent is enough to soothe your frayed nerves. As your breathing evens out and your muscles slowly relax, the world around you slowly fades. It’s with your face pressed into his pillow and wrapped up in his blanket that reality starts to force its way back in with the dip of the mattress and a hand resting on your head. You jerk awake, heart in your throat until your eyes settle blearily on Satoru. His glasses pushed up and holding his hair back while he looks at you with an achingly soft expression. Surprise creeps in when tears begin to well up in your eyes. 
“Hey hey what’s with the tears?” As he asks you sit bolt upright to hug him. Pressing your teary face to his neck and wrapping your arms around his waist. His clothes and skin are still cool from the chilly spring night, the scent of crisp mountain air that surrounds the campus clinging to him.  Beyond that though is all him. A scent of comfort you’d sought out by crawling into his bed, but it’s so much better when paired with the sounds of his breathing and the safe haven of his arms as he wraps you up tight.  He rests his chin on your head. The two of you sit like that, him simply holding you and slowly warming up as he waits for you to calm down enough to tell him what’s going on. Normally if you’re to be found in one of their rooms it was Suguru’s since that’s usually where the three of you slept together and Suguru was admittedly at the school more than he was these days. When you finally pull your face from his neck with a sniffle he swipes a thumb over your cheek. “So is my crybaby gonna tell me what’s wrong?” 
A small watery laugh from you makes him smile and lean in to press his lips to your forehead.  It’s short lived though. You take in his beautiful, very much alive face, cheeks flushed and eyes bright but then when you blink his bloodied face flashes in your mind. You shake your head, biting at your lip. “I just…” How honest did you want to be? 
Satoru’s smile fades as the two of you sit in the quiet of his room. “I can’t help if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.”
“You being here is enough.” He doesn’t look convinced by your words and you relent. Thinking of how you’ve felt as Suguru’s been slowly closing you out. “I.. I dreamt about..” a deep breath.  “I had a nightmare about.. About when I thought you’d died.” You look away from him only for him to suddenly cup your face in both his hands, tilting your face toward him as he rests his forehead against yours. All you can see now are his eyes, a mix of sparkling blues that you’d happily get lost in. His breath fans across your face before his lips, warm and so alive, press against your own. An affirmation. He breathes his own life into your lungs so there’s no denying that he’s here with you.
He deepens the kiss in a way he hasn’t before with you, that you’ve only caught him doing with Suguru before. He tips you back toward the bed, pressing you down into soft sheets before parting from you slowly. He goes to speak but his glasses finally slip off the top of his head and smack you in the face before he can stop them.
Both of you remain in place, stunned, until your shoulders begin to shake with quiet laughter. Picking up the offending eyewear you hold it out to him.. “I think these are yours.” You bite you lip trying to hold back a smile. 
Satoru groans and lets his face fall to your neck. He doesn’t glance at you until he hears you place his glasses on the side table and then he feels your arms wrap around his shoulders. “See… I said you being here was enough.” You nuzzle your face against his hair. 
He hums into your neck before falling to his side and cradling you against his chest. “I’m..” he sighs. “I’m sorry I’m not here more often.. I know i’m gone a lot and it’s been just you and Suguru dealing with stuff alone.” 
“ ‘s not your fault… You’re needed in a lot of places… and besides that means you’re also dealing with things alone doesn’t it?” 
He squeezes you tight for a moment. “ Don’t worry i’m one of the stron- “
You cut him off “That doesn’t matter. You’re still just a person.” 
And he’s taken back to that night before everything went wrong. When you’d said those words to him before and you’d made him feel seen and he realized maybe you cared about him just as much as you cared for Suguru. He remains quiet as he holds you. The silence isn’t broken until you mumble against his chest. “Actually… I wanted to talk to you about Suguru..”
Satoru pulls back to look at you, showing that you have his full attention. 
“If you can… I think he needs you. He doesn’t say it! But..” You trail off a little. “He hasn’t been doing well.” 
Satoru’s eyes flick over your face, a worried crease forming between his eyebrows. “If he needs something I’m sure he’ll tell us-” 
“He won’t. “ 
The sureness in your voice takes Satoru aback a little. “While you’ve been away on your latest mission he was barely eating and didn’t even shower or brush his hair for nearly a week. He was even avoiding me until I pleaded with him at his door to let me in… “ Satoru squeezes you. “He was barely eating and didn’t even shower until I convinced him to by saying I’d wash his hair for him.” 
Satoru’s throat bobs. “Okay.. I’ll talk to him.  I promise.” 
“I’m sorry.” 
He blinks at you. “Why are you apologizing?” His eyebrows vanish behind his bangs. 
“Well… I acknowledged how busy you are and how much you have on your plate in one breath and then in the next asked for your help with Suguru- ow!” You hand flies up to your forehead that had just been flicked. “What was that for?” you pout. 
“For being ridiculous that’s what. Remember what I said a couple minutes ago? ‘I can’t help if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.’ That also means I want to know when things are wrong. With both you and Suguru. You’re both so stubborn, what’s it gonna take to get through to the two of you how important you are to me..” The last part is said quietly.  “I’m gonna start telling those old bastards to back off a bit okay? I’ll find more time for you both…” 
“ ‘toru…” Your chest feels tight. 
His lips quirk into a smile bringing out his dimples. “Let me help okay?”
“Okay.” you return his smile. 
“So… did you?”
You tilt your head to the side. “Did I what?” 
“Help him shower I mean? “ He tugs a bit at the collar of your pajamas. “Did he get to see you naked first and without me?” He says with a little pout. 
Your face flushes with heat and you smack his hand away. “Satoru!” a pause. “Yes and no. I helped him shower but I wore a robe the whole time.” 
He seems mollified but then that pretty mouth of his opens again. “So you got to see him naked then?”
“Oh my god Satoru. Suguru was right when he said you’d be jealous.”
“I’m not jealous!” he says indignantly.  
“You’re so jealous.” 
“...Okay maybe a little.” 
You smile and cup his face. “You know… I think you both forget.. Or maybe it’s because. Well maybe it’s because I’ve been so nervous to actually say it but i don’t think it’s fair to keep it in. But I love you, Satoru. I love you both.” You think of Suguru’s tears when you said it to him finally, and it’s such a contrast to Satoru. Because his face lights up like the stars in the sky, eyes shining and turning pink from his cheeks to the tips of his ears. His smile is dazzling, at least what you see of it is before his mouth crashes into yours. 
Then with his lips still pressed to yours. “I love you too.” It startles you a bit to hear it back but then you’re grinning and pressing a toothy smile of your own against his lips.
___
And that wraps up this chapter! Like I said at the start I enjoyed writing this one! The next chapter actually has a good chunk written that I just need to revise to reflect changes that i've made as I've been writing the story since i wrote it a while ago. We're sort of hitting the home stretch with this story because basically everything after this I've had planned since I decided to make this a series. A lot of it is outlined and written out and just needs to be properly fleshed out.
Special thanks to @strawberrystepmom for beta reading this for me. You guys have no idea how much she's helped with this fic with her assurances and support.
Taglist! (keep in mind you must be 18+ and have your age listed before i'll add you to my tag list. ) @pastelle-rabbit @hauntedhearthowl @biscuitsngravie @nanamikentoseyebags@sleezzsister @moonsua1, @yuuuumii @yokaimoon @4sat0ruu-deactivated20231218 (nooo this isn't how i wanted to find out you deactivated!!) @chibiizzy @porridgesblog @suhmie, @defacatestenderly @agentdedf1sh @night-shadowblood-writes2 @missphanosaur18 @stevenknightmarc @icy-spicy @mysugu @fushigurro @missmugiwara
...The whole time i was typing up the tags my cat has had the zoomies and has been screaming like banshee running up and down the halls from my room to the kitchen. So i'm gonna go get his wet food now...
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Note
I don’t know if you’ve been asked this but I wanted to ask your opinion on something regarding Fellow Honest and Gidel.
So, we know that at the end of the “Stage in Playful Land” event, Kalim pretty much offers Fellow a spot as a student in NRC, but Fellow declines citing that he doesn’t want to go to a school with a bunch of brats AND he wants to make his own school that admits low magic users and non magic users.
I think this fits him perfectly and I won’t say that it’s dissatisfying for Fellow and Gidel’s story to end this way, but do you think that - had the events been more intertwined with the main story - Fellow could’ve potentially started going to NRC at some point? Like do you think it would make sense for him to both want to create this school AND prepare himself via getting a proper education?
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The ending was so fitting for the type of person Fellow is and what he dreams of accomplishing. He’s trying to carve out his own path in the world with Gidel at his side! There’s both a bittersweetness and hope in that kind of a finale.
Now, to the question. This may sound a little cynical (please stick with me for a moment!!) 💦 but I don’t think studying at Night Raven College would help Fellow in opening his own school. Of course, getting an education is important—however, I firmly believe that NRC is not the right place for Fellow to get that education. (This won’t stop TWST from probably making a playable Fellow card for Halloween 2024 though, I suspect that it’ll be a temporary or non-main story canon situation like Rollo.)
The first hurdle to overcome is actually convincing Fellow to enroll. I don’t believe him turning down Kalim’s invite was just for convenience or to keep event characters separate from the main story; it genuinely makes more sense for his character to not want to go right back into the system he despises, the system that tossed him out to begin with. He has not only distrust in the elite (and literally just came out of a hard situation where the elite controlled him), but too much pride in himself to allow for that. Another issue is that even if it is Kalim extending the offer, he actually has little say in whether or not Crowley will let Fellow in. (I’m not counting monetary bribes here yet because that’s an unfair advantage for Kalim to get literally anyone in.) If we’re being pragmatic, Kalim is oversimplifying the solution to Fellow’s issues, just the same as Kalim offering an overly simple solution for Jamil’s woes in book 4. We have no idea how realistic this enrollment would be for Fellow.
Assuming Fellow is convinced to give it a shot and does get into NRC courtesy of a large donation from the Asims… then what? Sure, Fellow does stand to gain from an affiliation with NRC but that's pretty much ONLY if he manages to earn that coveted diploma and formally graduates. Many of the classes beyond year 1 demand a substantial amount of magic in order to complete the coursework. Fellow canonically does not have a ton of magic to spare, so it's doubtful whether or not he would be able to pass those classes or make it to fourth year internships (which is when you can really take advantage of NRC's connections in various industries). It's a similar situation as Yuu, who has no magic at all and wouldn't be able to even participate in the higher level courses without Grim doing all the magical tasks for them. We know it's very possible to drop out of these magic schools (as Riddle references that no student has dropped out since he took on the role of dorm leader + a NPC in book 5 is stated to be a magic school dropout). Who's to say this wouldn't be Fellow's fate if he can't handle the magic curriculum? Yes, he can certainly give it a try if he wants to and his efforts shouldn't be insulted. However, the fact of the matter is that he most likely would not be able to physically keep up with his peers (through admittedly no fault of his own, it's not like he can control his genetic makeup).
Another thing is, what exactly does NRC have to offer Fellow that would actually help him with getting the knowledge to set up his own school? NRC is meant to specifically train mages (and mainly for jobs which demand magical capabilities). Fellow wants to establish his own school, which in of itself does not require a magic degree or any sort of magic education. Furthermore, he details that his school would admit non and low magic users, and will focus on teaching "true life lessons". None of this inherently requires any knowledge or training in magic, which, again, is NRC's specialty. The only practical skills classes that NRC offers seem to be electives like Culinary Crucibles/Master Chef (which, conveniently, do not require magic), and those can be learned anywhere, not exclusively at NRC. I guess my question would be... What is the point of Fellow studying at NRC if he 1) would have a hard time with the magic demands of several classes, 2) most of what NRC teaches is not applicable to his long-term goals, and 3) he could easily learn the practical skills he values so much elsewhere? It's a time sink that doesn't benefit him as much as he needs it to.
If Fellow wants to attend school or to get the knowledge he needs to set up his own learning institution, I think he should ideally pick a mixed public school that does not have a focus on magic. Plenty of those must exist to accommodate the 90% human population without magic. NRC is a restrictive environment mainly composed of the upper echelon and the gifted, and is thus the antithesis of what Fellow seeks to create. Public schools are overall more accessible and offer a more diverse population which Fellow can for sure learn from. It would also be useful as there may be low magic users (that aren't strong enough to qualify for magic schools) mixed in with non-magic users. Fellow could hit up his exact target demographic and mingle with them, get to familiarize himself with their wants and needs, etc. At the same time, he would be theoretically pursuing a specialized degree in education or whatever it is he would need to establish his own school and become an educator himself. That route makes a lot more sense to me than just lumping Fellow in at NRC because that happens to be where all the other major characters go.
Again, it's definitely possible for Fellow to get an education while having his dream. (That's also the case for lots of us fans that go to school while also having our own hobbies and personal goals on the side!) The issue is that I don't see Fellow "fitting in" or learning well at any magic school, especially not one as privatized as NRC is.
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toastandjamie · 3 months
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Okay so, I wanna preface this by saying that I have not read Sanderson’s other books so this is not a discussion about his actual abilities as a writer, and I’m not saying that he’s in anyway a bad writer. I do not envy the situation he was in At All, it must’ve been incredibly difficult to be given the responsibility of finishing such a long and beloved story as Wheel of Time. Trying to honor RJ’s story and characters when you are jumping in at the climax and expected to finish it in a way that the fans find satisfying when there is no way to make Every fan happy with the ending. Okay with that out of the way let’s talk.
So i have a lot of feelings about the final three books of Wheel of Time. There were many parts I enjoyed and there were also parts I was disappointed by. Personally, I felt like many aspects of the last three books felt rushed and incomplete and the pacing a bit odd in places and a lot of that comes down to the fact that it was originally meant to be one giant book, but like- that would’ve been ridiculous and I agree with the choice to break it up into multiple books. However I honestly think they should’ve just broke it up into more than three books to properly to pace them. There were a lot of things that Needed to happen that I think ended up causing certain things to get cut, for instance I do believe a big portion of both Mat and Min’s storylines in those last books were cut for time, specifically I think there was probably originally a lot more time dedicated to dealing with the Seanchen. What I believe to have happened is that Sanderson was given the notes about where the Black Tower needed to be and decided to dedicate the time to it and in exchange he cut the Seanchen plot line for pacing since the Seanchen were Technically already solved. Technically. Now controversial opinion but I did actually like Androl, however, I think he and the rest of the Black Tower suffered from having their storyline rushed. The plot line in the black tower should’ve started after the Ashaman with Rand betrayed them as we got to see the corruption already seeping into the Black Tower. Sadly that’s not what we got, but it honestly deserved an entire book to properly introduce it and it would’ve benefited from having pre-established characters that we cared about be more involved. Other parts of the story I think deserved more time dedicated to, the actual process of stealing the horn of Valere back from the White Tower, I wanted a heist mission with Faile and the Band but that is just personal preference lol. More time learning about Slayer and the red veiled Aiel, they were introduced and then promptly stopped actually mattering outside of being enemy fodder. Literally everything about Faine and the Evil of Shadar Logoth, Faine dying so quickly will forever disappoint me, he was a main antagonist since book one and his death felt very quick and unceremonious, like just tying up loose ends.
Next is issues with characterization. Once again I do not envy Sanderson’s job here at all. This type of thing isn’t easy but I can also see exactly where the issues were. Sanderson by his own admission didn’t understand Mat, and he Did get better at writing him but the damage was already done unfortunately and there wasn’t enough time to properly fix the issues with Mat’s characterization. Mat was not the only character whose characterization was flattened however, Aviendha and Tuon for instance also lacked a lot of their original nuance. I think it’s very clear where Sanderson struggled and that is with unreliable narrators. Characters that Sanderson seems to both enjoy the most and successfully write in a compelling way are characters who very straight forward and honest, their internal monologue matches their actions, and they reliably narrate their stories. Characters like Perrin and Galad thrived under Sanderson’s writing style. Androl is a very obvious example of this archetype being one that he’s comfortable writing. The issue he faced with both Mat and Tuon is that their unreliable narrators who act inconsistently to an outsider perspective and I think for Mat especially Sanderson struggled to get past his first impression of Mat. The biggest issue with Sanderson’s version of Mat is that his character arc was reset, Sanderson’s Mat was still running away from his destiny and trying to avoid Rand, something Mat had already worked past in books four and five with Melindra and the Rhavin incident teaching him to accept his destiny and embrace his role as Rand’s General. This meant that Mat and Tuon’s relationship lost a large part of its nuance and Mat’s actions felt out of character and immature for the point in the story we reached. There’s also the difference in how RJ wrote Mat’s “flirtatious play boy” status versus how Sanderson portrays it and it can feel a bit jarring at times, and just in general, I feel like Sanderson often wrote Mat as “stupid” where he very much isn’t. He’s reckless and mischievous but never stupid and I think Sanderson equated his recklessness with stupidity in some places.
Writers play favorites, and it does show, RJ’s favorite was Mat and Sanderson’s favorite was Perrin and both are very obvious preferences. Poor Rand was neither writers favorite but it’s okay because as the protagonist he at least got consistent page time dedicated to him. RJ definitely paid more attention to Mat than Perrin and Sanderson did vice versa. So I’m not complaining just because I wanted Mat to get more page time. My issues with it are that Mat ended up feeling a bit underwhelming during the last battle. Where all other characters got to have their spotlight moment during a Memory of Light, Mat didn’t; and perhaps that’s because Towers of Midnight was originally part of a Memory of Light so Mat had got his big moment in the final book during the original draft. The Seanchen overall felt like it was resolved in an underwhelming manner, as did the Shadar Logoth plot line and it just so happens that both of those plot lines were Mat’s and I do think Sanderson’s bias informed his decision at least subconsciously when choosing which storylines to trim down.
In summary I would’ve rather Sanderson made it five more whole books if it meant that all the plot lines could be given enough time to be resolved in a fully satisfactory way.
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runespoor7 · 5 months
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Jiang Cheng brings back WWX to LP after his resurrection because LWJ wasn't around
Five Fun Facts About The Fic I Might Write About It, This Is A Slowburn(?) Version, For Other Versions Ask Again:
WWX insists that he's not himself far past the point of it being sensible. The thing is, it's not the first time JC decided some random demonic cultivator was WWX and dragged him home to demande apologies and play house? Last time was over half a decade ago, so not everyone in the sect knows, but those who remember are pretty wary about it, especially because of what it means about JC's mental state. Is Sect Leader getting worse again? They're also very wary of WWX, some of them openly contemptuous - WWX has the feeling that if it weren't for JC's protection he would be dead - and some of them almost pitying. I think he overhears them talk and that's how he pieces together the backstory, and also learns that the demonic cultivator whom JC is convinced are WWX and that he treats as such don't... end well. Sect Leader takes the "betrayal" badly.
WWX realizes that YMJ doesn't have a second in command. the sect has a person who performs the tasks associated with the job, but JC doesn't have a "second-in-command", never did. it just stuck that way. it sure doesn't mean anything. probably. how weird of JC though.
the Ghost General intrudes on Lotus Pier. There's a fight, JC tries to take down WN, WWX orders WN away from JC, JC freaks out. WWX keeps swearing up and down he's not WWX, honest!!! but... on the other hand... the Ghost General recognizes him as its his master... this is what breaks JC's hopes, finally, and also WWX's heart. You get JC crying as he asks WWX "are you really not him?" and WWX doing the equivalent of Cyrano's "No, my sweet love, I never loved you!" but for who he is, with less clear-cut emotional consequences than in the play (this is because WWX is not dying and thus more invested in keeping the lie up and JC is way less certain that WWX cares about him than Roxane did about Cyrano). They sort of compromise on the understanding that "MXY" is kinda-sorta WWX, but without most of WWX's memories. (WWX is telling himself that's not what he wanted but in fact he's much more comfortable/confident with himself and being in YMJ afterwards!) this is probably when WWX realizes that while his room may not exist anymore, his things are in JC's room.
JC struggles with this WWX being an innocent lamb who has no memory of doing anything wrong in his life ever. He should've expected it. How convenient. But, y'know, a WWX is a WWX, and this also extremely conveniently lets JC off the hook of this pesky "remember how he orphaned your nephew?" thing! It's mostly JC's own guilt now. Mostly. He's not going to do anything against WWX even if it wasn't anyway. Also it's. terrifying. Because WWX has no memory of him, but WWX is around, and also there isn't anyone to judge JC for wanting-- ANYWAY.
They end up having to leave Lotus Pier and catch up with the main plot when WWX gets a spider sense that WN is in trouble. There are no words to explain how little JC likes 1)that the Ghost General is still a thing, 2)that the Ghost General is still a thing when it comes to WWX, 3)that WWX is planning on leaving LP to help WN, so he comes with. WWX tries to convince him not to, but surprises himself by accepting JC's help when JC insists in a clipped tone. The trouble that WN got in also involves JL being in danger. This is my fic so it would turn out that WN tried to protect JL before WWX and JC caught up. Possibly JL and WN have been getting in plot-relevant shenanigans offscreen for a while now, and there's definitely a fic there, what with WN thinking A-Yuan is dead and projecting on JL and JL getting conflicted feelings about the person/thing that killed his father, but that's not the focus in this story. At some point - because by now he's pretty certain JC will not either kill him or reject him - WWX "admits" that his memory has been returning. Not all of it, but enough. If we're all very very lucky JL has been in sufficient danger that JC can lose his head a little and kiss WWX for saving JL's life, or something along these lines. If we're not lucky that part happens beyond the scope of these five things.
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utilitycaster · 9 days
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You described C3 as frequently feeling like it's accelerating only to pump the breaks, and that really perfectly articulates some of the mixed feelings I have about this campaign. There have been a couple of times now when I've been really excited and invested in where the story is going (Laudna's death, the party split, Ashton blowing up, now with FCG's death, etc.), and then it's felt like that momentum has been either derailed or softened (either immediately or after an episode or two). It's all moments on the darker end of the emotional spectrum, so I wonder if it's folks wanting to pull back from it, but it feels like it's been a theme in this campaign in a way it wasn't in C1 and C2. Maybe there's something else going on that I'm not thinking of though?
So I think this post about pacing I made earlier this week covers this indirectly. I think it's a mix of the early groundwork for the party developing a culture of checking in with each other, working through conflict, and deciding what to do being constantly interrupted; and the fact that this is a more heavily railroaded campaign. I want to be clear - I don't think the railroading is bad at all! But I think that the prep for a campaign that had a more defined plot, especially starting quite early on, needed to be more extensive. I think it should have probably had a session zero that was a tradition one - not a playtest of two or three characters who knew each other, but the main cast members sitting down and saying "oh, huh, no one here has a high INT score" - or a heavier hand from Matt.
I think, for example, Ashton exploding was great and the choices afterwards were sound, it's just that the party doesn't have the tools to resolve this sort of conflict and so they shy from it. I also think some of the players who tend to embrace difficult choices and conflict that ultimately lead to those darker places and, in my opinion, better story, have chosen to take a back seat; and some of the players in the position to make those bold decisions have declined to make them, which is their right in terms of agency but is less of the story I personally wish to see.
I do want to note that like...they have interrupted the story but they have not yet been proven to have pumped the brakes now; it is possible the cast will pick up seamlessly with the next episode. It's really just that like...as you said, it feels like a pattern.
I suppose the next thing I'm going to say is going to be unpopular, but let's be honest, that has never once stopped me. I think a lot of Campaign 3's more passionate defenders are people who prefer what I'd consider quick, easy, feel-good highs, with a trade-off of a deeper narrative since that requires effort. The people who unironically said "must a story have conflict?" The people who just want weeks on end of downtime after this moon plot (and look this campaign has surprised me many times, and as this question indicates, not all were positive nor narratively satisfying, so I absolutely could be wrong here but I'm just increasingly like...what will they do after this moon plot. Name a significant plot hook that isn't part of the moon plot.) The people who are like "why would the party attack Bor'Dor simply because they tried to kill them? Why would Orym contact the person he clearly has a massive crush on when he's upset when other people are right there? Why would the people of Gelvaan have reservations about mind readers? Why doesn't Ross, the largest friend, simply eat all the other friends?"
But getting back to the original point I really do think that because of the different nature of this campaign - and it is different, structurally, and I don't think that's the root cause - more intense prepwork needed to be done both leading in (character creation) and in the early stages, and I think because it was going to be so tightly plotted later on I think it needed looser plotting earlier to allow the party to mesh and be easier to guide.
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sunnybyler · 9 days
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so in light of some convos i’ve had on here today, i started thinking about if i’d be one of the people who would quit the series if the next book isn’t my ship. for reference, i’m an elucien girlie through and through (and i love gwynriel too). and my honest answer is….. maybe?? unfortunately probably, but not because i lost the ship war. oh no, that is something i am VERY acquainted with and can usually stomach. hell, half my ships are pulled out of my ass and never dated. i can lose and accept that and sometimes even learn to like the winning ship. no, my problem would boil down to one thing entirely: lucien vanserra.
lucien is my favorite character in the entire acotar series, has been since we first met him, and even with everyone shitting on his character in the last 4 books i never stopped loving him. and my main problem is this. i cannot fathom a happy ending for him if e/riel is endgame. so my problem isn’t seeing e/riel endgame on its own — even though the bonus chapter gave me the worst ick, i wouldn’t necessarily be FULLY opposed to read their story if lucien wasn’t in the picture. in fact i can see the appeal sometimes, i’ve even dabbled in some fics just for fun. but i just cannot see how sjm could pull that story off without destroying his character, ruining his life, or just straight up killing him. none of which i would ever want to read. (and do not even try and throw vassa at me, lucien’s happy ending is NOT going to be watching yet another of his lovers die). if someone new was introduced and his book was hinted at, i would probably read it honestly. though i cant say i’d be happy about it.
so, essentially what i’m saying is that if lucien is happy, or if it’s implied he will be in the future, i’ll read it. i would certainly not be first in line, i’d let my stronger lucien warriors read it first and decide if it’s too tragic or not. i try to have an open mind about these things despite having my own strong opinions, so i genuinely would try my best to read any acotar book that gets published, even if i lose. but i physically couldn’t make myself read about my favorite character suffering endlessly or turning evil out of nowhere, and that’s why i’m so hesitant to confidently say that i would give the book a shot.
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