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tsuki-sennin · 1 year

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Deliciousmile~! ...hey wait a sec, that doesn't seem right. Well, y'know, what's a festival without food, eh? And, well, this is a very special watch for us today, y'know why? Why, because today is Inoue-sensei's birthday, of course~!

I don't exactly know how best to celebrate, but I do want to congratulate him for keeping Donbrothers as a non-stop banger of a season. Perhaps not the best we've ever had, but certainly not one I'd ever forget.

Now, enough delay! As they say in that other town with a Toei superhero team unified by a common theme, food brings smiles~! And it's the dog cooking, you know this'll be great~!

-Sonoshi will be back.

-Fancy eatin'...

-Flavoooooor!

-...are you some kinda circuit board?

-Oh dear god, she vores.

-Inoue what the fuck

-Have you been spending too much time on the internet again?

-Yeah, the Juto forest is... absolutely horrific, I don't blame Tsubasa for wanting out.

-"...can I go now? I wanna wash all this forest stink off of me."

-Freedoooooooom.

-Nice weather :)

-Dog go nyoom!

-There he is.

-Inuzuka-san!

-Oh hi Kijino.

-Are... you alright?

-"Okay I know I sold you out, but like... wanna go eat at a fancy restaurant with my wife?"

-"What the fuck, no."

-Tsubasa, this man who snitched on you is married to a doll and your first instinct is to hug him?

-Oh hey Rumi-chan! Jirou-kun!

-Byeeeeeee

-"My cringefail boyfriend is too pure to be alive."

-Dinner!

-Gotta say, big missed opportunity to have a ton of Hoka-Hoka Hearts everywhere.

-"Y-you can have her man, Jesus Christ calm down."

-Oh hey, the cat came back.

-I gotta ask Tiger Jirou, are you perhaps a Juuto in some way?

-Keep things professional with your editors, folks.

-Oh yeah, Sononi did shoot you down lmao

-Sorry Shinichi, she's got a point there

-Jesus Christ, we couldn't have ONE peaceful dinner, could we!

-Shaddap!

-That chef is about to kill a man.

-Ohhhh...

-Tsubasa, jkh,hlbl

-Shef Off

-"Wow! This reminds me of my imaginary food that I eat because money burns my skin off!"

-Hello food critic lady!

-Iida-sensei, okay!

-A cooking contest!

-Damn, a hundred million yen isn't even enough for this restaurant, huh?

-No wonder Tsubasa got all uppity.

-What is he cookin'?

-Tsubasa what the fuck why is the fugitive gene a thing

-Deliciousmile~!

-Pipipi~!

-"Good, but not award winning" is the highest praise I've ever heard Tarou give any food.

-Ingredient

-Mop those floors, Tsuyoshi!

-Retrieve Egg

-The remaining

-SONOI WHAT

-"Give me those fucking eggs. Sonoshi ate all my spare like the fucking gremlin they are, and I can't send someone to the store. Sonoza scares the cashier too much, and if you ask a condor-themed woman for eggs, she gives you a very strange look."

-I love this.

-Yeah good job fellas!

-A field of flowers~!

-Damn Haruka, you really drew that background in five seconds, huh?

-Oh god here she comes

-SHE ATE MY DOG

-What the fuck, Vore Dimension?

-Oh?

-OH FUCK

-Tsubasa, you don't just eat fruit you find in a random forest dimension!

-"Murasame! Let's cut them into sashimi!"

-Fruit~!

-Back off, everybody!

-Seiya Seiya!

-Nooooo, Murasame! Pick him up, Sonoza!

-Oh, good, we're not eating Helheim fruit. Good.

-OVERFLOWING?

-OH SHIT

-Recolor!

-"YOU ASSHOLES, I HAVE AN OMELET ON THE STOVE, IT'S GONNA BURN THE KITCHEN DOOOOOOOOOOWN-!"

-Wow, Tarou really said "A gold bird does the job just fine, unlike you Kijino."

-Poor Murasame.

-"Good job buddy."

-Fooooood~!

-Blue pasta!

-Iida-sensei's imagination is a good bit more professional, huh?

-Awwwww, Sonoi... :)

-Oh?

-Have a snacc, Tarou-san

-jklhkilh;k'

-Holy shit, Tarou

-Holy shit, Rumi's cooking must cure every disease ever if it's that good!

-M

-Miho-san.

-CRANE LADY????

-WHAAAAAAT

-WHY YOU BACK

-DONKILLER JKHLHJ'

-My god.

-Does this "button" just have an "Evil" setting you can press with all the sensitivity of a space bar?

-Oh well, this episode is either going to be peak comedy or absolutely horrifying. Or both. No in-betweens allowed here.

-Alright, let's pack it up folks, episode's done! We're done talkin' for today! Happy birthday again, Inoue-sensei!

#donbrothers spoilers #avataro sentai donbrothers #donbrothers #super sentai #don! don! it's a full force peachy festival!

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team-funnymen-2 · 2 years

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Scout, Demo, Pyro and the Best Milkshake Ever

Got bored, wrote about shenanigans. This takes place post-war but that’s not too important lmao. Up on my ao3 too!

“Get’cha mitts outta me way, laddie!”

“I’m tryna help!!” Scout and Demoman bickered, pushing and shoving each other out of the way. From the door, Pyro entered, wanting to know what the noise was. They made a muffled expression of interest, and the two’s heads snapped to face them.

“Heyo, Pyro, I was tryin’ ta make a chocolate milkshake but this wee rascal keeps attemptin’ ta sneak in ‘is store-bought shite!” Demo replied, letting go of Scout’s collar.

“He insulted my ma’s cookin’!” Whined the younger, forcing his lower lip to tremble for sympathy.

“Fer the last time, lad! Yer mum dinnae make it! The fellers at the whatchamamacallit factory did, she just put in milk! We’re makin’ gourmet milkshakes in my kitchen!”

“It isn’t your kitchen, man! You BROKE INTO MY CRIB!” Before fists could fly again, Pyro trotted up and pushed the two apart, taking Scout’s chocolate powder and Demo’s hershey’s syrup.

They pulled a full sized chef's hat from their pocket, plopping it on their head, then cracked their knuckles, and then began to whizz around the kitchen, taking out seemingly every item they could. Throwing open the fridge, Pyro grabbed Scout’s tub of ice cream, some milk, some flour (why does scout keep flour in the fridge?), and an armful of whatever else they could see.

Demo and Scout gazed in awe and horror as their friend filled a mixing bowl with milk, before opening the ice cream and grabbing fistfuls of it, mixing it with their hands.

“...Dat don’t look,,, uhh,,, sani-tree? Dat’s the word, right?” Scout whispered to the taller man beside him. “Lad, I seen ye eatin’ goldfish crackers off yer bedroom floor.” He replied. “Shh, what’re they doin’ now?”

Scout turned back to see Pyro dumping both the chocolate powder and syrup into the bowl, pounding it with their fists, sending mixture everywhere. He licked some off his face and had a brilliant idea.

Scout zipped to his broken fridge, pulling out a can of bonk. He snuck up beside Pyro and began to pour the radioactive waste in, ignoring Demoman’s desperate gestures telling him to stop.

When they did notice, Pyro clapped, happy to see their best friends helping. Scout’s grin grew prominent as he grabbed a bottle of medic’s experimental cough syrup and squeezed a good third of it in.

Demoman let out a groan, which slowly morphed into a chuckle as he shook his head. Ah well, If ye cannae beat ‘em, join ‘em, he thought, grabbing a flask of whisky from his pocket and pouring the entire bottle into the mix, much to the younger two’s delight.

A few minutes passed and their mixture was complete. Nobody wanted to taste test it, however. Demo and Scout, back to being best of buddies, stepped back to admire it.

Yet Pyro had one more idea. A familiar spark of curiosity seemed to shine through their mask as they dropped the mixing bowl into a larger steel one. Before the other two had a chance to object, Pyro had whipped out their flamethrower and was torching the mix, melting it into goop.

As the flames flickered down, Demo and Scout were catching their breath from laughing their heads off. They went up to the ‘milkshake’, which had now begun to bubble as if it was alive. All three of the mercs were thinking the same thing, but Scout said it first.

“Ya think if we drink dis we’ll get supapowers?”

“Maybe, only one way to find out, eh?” Demo grinned.

“Mppha!!” Said pyro enthusiastically, pulling a straw from the cupboard and beginning to slurp up the mixture, and the others began to do the same.

Later that night, one Medic was awoken by three of his friends, all complaining of hallucinations and stomach aches. ‘Twas an eventful day for all.

#scout tf2 #demoman tf2 #pyro tf2 #fluff #platonic or romantic #up to yall!!#oneshot #team fortress 2 #fanfic

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mega-ultra-so-awesome-it-hurts · 3 years

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Replaced... for the Better

A/N: OKAY LOVES I DID IT! HERE IT IS! I KNOW IT’S TWO MILLION YEARS LATE BUT HERE!

Pairing: Paul Lahote x black!reader x Jasper Hale

Genre: Angst

Warnings: Heavy angst, sort of cheating.

Requested: No, but pleeeease request. I’m booored

Word count: 1106 (eep SORRY it’s so short! I was in a mood when I wrote out the rought draft hehe)

Summary: You find out you’re not the only one Paul imprinted on. But how will you take it? There MIGHT be a part 2, if enough people want it.

(GIF’s are not mine. Credit to owners!)

You weren’t the most beautiful woman in the world, and you knew it. But Paul still loved you. You knew he did. Or, you thought he did. Allow me to set the scene:

It was August, 2008. Slightly chilly outside, so it was cold inside, too. You were cooking dinner for the boys. You heard the door open, and you felt a cool Autumn breeze flow through your burnt orange sweater.

“Angel?” You smiled. It was Paul, your fiance. But... you thought you heard another person with him. One of the pack, maybe?

“Kitchen, baby! C’mere, I want you to taste this gumbo I’m makin’!” You were from New Orleans, and you were always cookin’ up soul food for your boys. A lot of times, you’d try some new food that you weren’t familiar with, but they’d all turn out wonderful. You and Emily were the best cooks on the reservation, that was for sure. The Pack thought y’all were the best cooks in Forks, but that was a bit cocky, and cocky wasn’t really your thing.

Paul’s footsteps stalled in the hallway, and you could hear the faintest of whispers. You rolled your eyes, knowing how much Paul and Jared loved to sneak up behind you and steal tastes of whatever you were cookin’.

“Come on in, boys! I’ll let you have a taste, too, Jared!” You assured the other Quileute boy you were sure accompanied your man.

“Uh... Y/N, I’m not with Jared...” Paul’s voice sounded hesitant, and you knew instantly something was wrong. He never ever called you by your name. He must’ve done somethin’ stupid again, you figured.

“What’d you do now, Paul?” Your voice held a hint of amusement, but it was mostly tired. You’d been on your feet all day, and now Paul was being all suspicious, so you were not going to get to rest any time soon. Well, you were more right about that than you had thought.

“Um, Y/N, can you come into the living room?” You put down the sharp kitchen knife that Emily gave you for your 18th birthday last month, which you were using to dice the carrots. Slowly, you turned the stove flame down, making sure the gumbo wouldn’t burn. Then, ever so slightly, you peeked your head into the living room. With Paul was another man. Pale, pale thing, honeyed hair, and golden eyes. You relaxed a bit. The Cullens came over from time to time, so you were familiar with the blonde doctor and his family. You smiled, walking over to be a good hostess and welcome him, when you noticed a minor detail you hadn’t seen before.

They were holding hands.

You stopped in your tracks, your smile faltering. Paul let go of the blond Cullen boy’s, (was his name Jasper?) hand, moving closer to you.

“Angel,” Paul began, walking towards you. “This is Jasper.” So you were right. “He’s my other imprint.” You dropped to the floor in shock, legs bent to the left, hands supporting your upper half to your right.

“Y/N?” Paul knelt beside you, his brows furrowed in concern. You shook off his hand.

“When?” You inquired, eyes still trained on the ground before you.

“Y/N-”

“When??” You questioned once more. Paul flinched slightly, then closed his eyes.

“The battle with the newborns.” Your breath caught. That was only 3 months after you and he had met. Only two weeks after you and Paul had first kissed. You had forgotten to breathe, and now your lungs burned for air. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. Forcing a smile onto your features, you got to your feet.

“Hello,” Jasper said, nodding slightly. You softened a bit. You could tell he was nervous.

“Hi, honey. It’s wonderful to meet you.” You offered one of your better, more sincere smiles.

“You as well, ma’am.” Jasper stuck his hand out for you to shake. You shook your head, pushing it away.

“Now, now, sweetie. None of that.” You opened your arms, stepping forward.

“I’m a hugger, shugs.” He opened his arms as well, and you both shared a sweet - albeit awkward - embrace.

“Come on,” you said, pulling away.

“I’m makin’ some gumbo, and I need you to mince the celery.” You took his cold hand in yours and led him into the kitchen. You gave him a stalk of celery and handed him a knife, telling him to get to work.

And then, it was like you had both known each other forever. Because it had to be. You didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, and you definitely didn’t want to discourage Paul from happiness. So you laughed and smiled ‘till it hurt, locking your true feelings away in an iron safe so deep down, it was lost to even you.

Eventually, Jasper went home, and you stayed happy. For the rest of the day, you were all smiles, so bubbly it should’ve been suspicious. But nobody asked. Maybe they simply didn’t notice. Or maybe, just maybe, nobody cared.

_ _ _

Late that night, you and Paul were set up on the bed you both shared. You had your body resting against Paul’s chest, your lap housing a red bowl halfway filled with popcorn. You and Paul were watching a movie. It was one of the sappy romances that Paul couldn’t stand, but you loved them, and he loved you. Didn’t he? You were playing with Paul’s fingers when he asked you,

“You sure you’re okay with it?” He didn’t have to say what he meant. You knew. You put on your best act, looked up into Paul’s face, and you lied to him.

“Absolutely. Jas - He’s family now.” You couldn’t bring yourself to say his name. You hoped Paul didn’t notice. Paul’s expression changed, happy now. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, resting his chin on your head.

“You have no idea what that means to me, Angel. Thank you,” he whispered. You said nothing, not wanting to say anything else you couldn’t take back. You both went back to watching the movie. You were no longer playing with your man’s fingers, your hands now resting on either side of the popcorn bowl. Neither of you said another word.

Once the movie was over, you tied up your hair, laying next to Paul for the night. You waited for Paul’s breathing to even out, then changed into some decent runners clothes. You packed a duffel, and then, slipping a note into the side of the bed that you usually slept on, you left, without uttering so much as a goodbye.

A/N: I know it’s late, but it’s FINALLY done lmao. I had it written out weeks ago on paper, but between studying for midterms and failing biology, I haven’t really had time to update. Now, this wasn’t the ending I ORIGINALLY planned to go with, but i’m a bitch so I decided to change it. Part 2 MIGHT include more of the Cullen fam, and there MIGHT be a slight shift in gravity MUAHAHAHA. I have many things planned for the dear reader... so follow my account (or ask to be added to my taglist) for P2 when it comes!! SOrry for the title... my brain is spent and y’all probs won’t even see any MENTIONS of a P2 until March hahaha. But anyway hope y’all enjoyed this!

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yuzenji-archive · 4 years

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please do these hcs for kenma atsumu kuroo and kags! okay so how would they react to their s/o who NEVER curses, actually curses in front of them bc they accidentally burned themselves while cooking!

| riza: WAIT OMF THIS IS SO CUTE EYE )):

KENMA —

he finds it super endearing that u never EVER swear like ?? so precious!!!! (the nekoma team does a good job expressing that for him tho)

so then one day u came over and u offered to cook for kenma

he felt embarrassed that u wanted to do that for him like ?? okay u do u

it smelled great but he was honestly too busy gamin just a little and waiting for u

then he goes and gets something to drink and then

u burned urself

“ow- fuck!”

kenma spat his damn water and made a WHOLE ass mess on his counter bc like

WTF U SWORE????????? WHAT WAS THE REASON!!!!!

u come runnin over all panicked like KENMA ARE U OKAy as if u didnt just swear when hes Right There

his next mission was to find out who said fuck in ur presence and kill them (not really but ya kno,, give em an ear full of yelling)

ATSUMU —

when it dawned on him that u literally have never said a bad word

not even damn

somethin fuckin Turned on him like woah,, i have a partner who never swore ? HOW INNOCENT

well this one time he asked u to assist him in cookin dinner, u were assigned to keep stirrin the pot

unfortunately

and somehow

ur skin touched the hot ass pot

and ur pretty innocent lips said

“shit!”

atsumu nearly dropped his shit to the ground and he comes RUSHIN to u to check if ur aight

i feel like atsumu the typa bitch to be like “what a dirty mouth u have”

and none of yall can tell me im wrong

TETSURŌ —

i have this gut feeling where tetsu had at least ONCE tried to make u swear and not once did he ever succeed

“man give it up, theyre as pure as an angel”

actual morisuke quote

takin his damn quote to heart, tetsu literally gives up trying to get u to swear for him

at his apartment (he invited u for the night bc its friday no school tmr baybee) he told u that u can cook some noodles if u wanted

so u cooked some and u boiled the hot water and everythin

u kinda nudged it a lil wit ur arm on accident and that shit Hurted like it made u yell somethin so vulgar

which was goddammit i know its so Vulgar

tetsurō heard that shit from the living room and he comes running in lookin like this ÒoÓ

“DID U SWEAR”

“i did?”

“AAAAAAAAAA U JUST DID IM SO PROUD OF U”

why was he so proud? u dunno, u didnt think it was that much of a big deal that u swore

TOBIO —

tbh he knew u never swore lmao u talk to him in class and he Had never heard u swear like ag all

and he thinks its cute, a big contrast compared to him bc he regularly says ボケ！！

like u dont even say shit and thats so cute to him

u wanted ramen from the convenience store so yall went to get some and tobio offered his place for u to eat and make ur ramen

yall went down on this like weird “wait are u sure” “yes im sure” “ur parents wouldnt mind??” conversation and it lasted the entire walk from the store to his house so its basically too late to back tf out now

tobio helped u maneuver ur way around his kitchen and he helped u boil the water

so then comes the part where yall pour the water in yalls ramen cups and the hot water spilled a lil on ur hand

“ow- what the fuck-”

“woah u said fuck”

p sure u blushed a lil after that

tobio pretended he didnt hear it so that u have some of ur pride left in u

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jasontoddssuper · 3 years

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hello my new friend! i am really not doing well mentally; so i was wondering if you could write a percy x reader in which percy comforts Y/N when she’s having a bad day? im totally projecting right now but she needs alone time, but desperately needs him to just run her a bath, make her some food and help her pray to apollo for healing? (especially as he’s my g/p i just wish that it could be easy to have an actual good g/p parental figure lmao)

Of course i can!I hope this makes you feel better!Also i'm so happy we're friends <3

I'm here to make your life brighter

Percy was on his feet as soon as he saw the gloomy look on Y/n's face.He could tell she didn't want to talk about it but that didn't mean he couldn't help her.

"Hey,Perce."She dragged her feet across the room to flop down on his lap.She'd done it so many times before they'd even started dating and it always made him blush.

"Do you want me to run you a bath?"He asked,petting her hair.She nodded slowly,smiling a bit.

"Thank you,Percy!"

When he finished running her bath,he went to make her blueberry pancakes.As he was cooking,he felt familiar arms wrap themselves around his waist from behind."What's cookin',good lookin'?"

He chuckled,"Blueberry pancakes."

"Thank you,again."

"No need to thank me.I like helping you be happy."

She buried her face into his back and he laughed as he realized she was blushing.

"Shut up!"

"Make me!"He taunted.

She took the spatula from his hand and turned him around and his face burned as he saw she was wearing one of his shirt's.She kissed him and he felt weak in the knees but kissed her back.

He wasn't sure how long they'd been kissing but it was long enough that they needed to come up for air.He grinned,lovestruck,and she placed the spatula back in his hand."Make sure they don't get burned."

He snapped back to the pancakes and nearly sighed in relief as he saw they weren't burned yet.

Y/n sat on his lap again as she eat her pancakes and he stroked her hair.Once she finished,she got up and went to the kitchen to wash her plate.She came back to the living room after a few minutes.

"Let's pray to my dad to heal me."

"Okay!Do you wanna change first?"He gestured to her still wearing his shirt,which was obviously not hers.She grinned and he chuckled nervously.

"Nah,i think this is the perfect way to let Dad know we're dating."

#blitchen #percy jackson x reader #pjo #askxaquestion #📒

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starfellforestss · 3 years

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Good Morning (short OC fic)

Yuuto and Antonio deal with various antics from their sisters. (AKA Izzy writes a happy fic for once,,,)

TWs: N/A (If I need to add any pls let me know!)

Full fic below the cut!

Antonio wasn’t hesitant to walk into the kitchen that morning. The smell of pancakes let him know it definitely wasn’t his aunt cooking, and she was probably holed up in her room with a hangover anyway. Which could only mean…

“Wah-!”

He caught Fiordelisa just as she slipped from the plastic stool that she had been precariously tip-toed on top of.

“Woah, careful there-! Morning, Fio. Whatcha cookin’?”

“Hi hi, Toni!” Scrambling out of his arms, she excitedly gestured around the kitchen. “Fio’s making pancakes!”

“I can see that!” Antonio laughed, but couldn’t help eyeing the disaster that had taken over their kitchen due to Fio’s cooking.

“Would you like some help?”

“…Yes please.”

Ruffling her hair and making her giggle, Antonio got to work with the pancakes while Fio began tidying up.

Once she was settled down with her breakfast, and the kitchen was once again acceptably clean, he leaned against the countertop and pulled out his phone. He pulled up a picture he’d snapped of the kitchen before cleaning.

(10:56 AM)

Toni: The master chef was at it again this morning

Yuuto: Looks like she’s getting better at cooking than you already

Toni: Haha

Toni: Wyd?

Yuuto: Waking up Mayu

“Trying to wake up Mayu” would’ve probably been a more accurate statement, though. She had slept through 4 of her alarms already, and while Yuuto had been up since 5am, his sister was still out cold buried underneath an ungodly amount of blankets.

He’d tried everything. Poking her, shaking her, even screaming that the house was on fire (which only succeeded in having to deal with a startled mom and a sleeping sister). Mayu wouldn’t be happy about it, but there was only one thing left to do.

“Guess I’m an only child now.” Yuuto sighed dramatically, before throwing himself on top of the blanket pile.

Mayu’s first instinct was to scream, her second being to kick him. He landed on the floor with a groan.

“Ouch- good morning to you too, Mayumayu.”

“W-what the heck-?!”

“Don’t blame me. You wanted to be up for 11 o’clock, right? It’s… 11:08, so I didn’t do too bad. Considering you slept through your alarms.”

“…T-thank you…”

“Not just the alarm clocks- me screaming, Mom screaming, Dad dropping a pan on his foot- calm down, he’s fine. Which you’d know if you were awake. You’d think someone with sensitive hearing would be better at, you know, hearing things.”

Mayu pointedly removed her earplugs.

“…I feel challenged to build you an alarm that’s loud enough to break through them.”

“G-get out!”

And just like that, he was chased out of the room with a pillow smacked to the back of his head. Laughing, Yuuto took a moment to check his messages.

Toni: Tell her I say good morning… once she finally arises lmao

(11:10 AM)

Toni: Soooo… Fio has a sleepover at a friend’s house tonight… I’ll be so bored and lonely, love… unless…

Toni: Date night?

Yuuto: You’re ridiculous

Yuuto: Pick me up at 8.

#MY OCs #OC fic #OC Writing #writers on tumblr #short fiction #roughly 500 words #oc blog #yuuto watari #mayu watari #antonio cambareri #fiordelisa cambareri

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d-nghy-ck · 3 years

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hahaha holy shit dude, you weren't kidding when you said the titles were literal. But Penne??? Is Haechan cooking you into pasta sauce?

Oh my godddddDDDDD

You picked that one. This was me when the ask came in ^^^ It is the crackiest thing from that whole list. I’m about to look so ridiculous.

[ warning!! warning!! warning!! nonsense ahead!! this is not something I usually post, dudes!! if you’re sensitive to dumbassery, do not proceed!! ]

So uh... here’s the premise:

Currently the draft from F e b r u a r y stands at:

Haechan and YN grocery shopping while exchanging banter with heavy innuendo about how he wants to feed her his cock for dinner and cook up his personal special alfredo sauce for her. Wink wink.

After Haech gets to cookin’ up that sauce in her kitchen, they dine together and lay the innuendo on t h i c k. She’s moaning around her fork about how his penne tastes so good, how she wants it all in her mouth and inside her, she can’t get her fill of it, yet it fills her up sooo well, etc etc and despite it being so cheesy, Hyuck is undeniably into it (much to his dismay tbh).

While she’s putting on this act to intentionally fluster him and turn the power dynamics in her favor, she accidentally gets overzealous with the theatrics and spills his plate in his lap. The chaos reveals how the dirty talk over dinner clearly worked on him, and he’s pretty embarrassed and attempts to hide his obvious hard-on. Weakling, she beat you at your own game!

YN gets on her knees with a towel to clean the alfredo sauce off the tent in his pants, like oh, let me clean that off for you! all sweet an innocent, and when the stain doesn’t lift, she applies more pressure and savors his reactions HAHAHA, oh, it seeped through your jeans, let me take these off ... and... one thing leads to another, and ... it’s a crack smut. She cleans his cock off with her mouth. There is additional dialogue but I cannot even - I... well.

Because I never posted it (because: ?????? reasons?????) and Jackie is a tease, she encouraged me with this edit LMAO:

And she ALSO made a teaser VIDEO.

help

#are you even surprised mads #probably not #you've seen the other monsters i've created in secret #asks

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smashbrandiscooch · 4 years

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Any Dina fluff or smut welcome (please and thanks)

Cooking With Dina Headcannons 🥘

SFW

Dina loves to cook and bake; it’s almost therapeutic for her

She’s so blessed to have the farm in the first place, so Dina doesn’t take anything for granted

If you can’t find her, she’s almost always in the kitchen

Everything she makes turns out really good too

Don’t even try asking what her secret recipe is, she won’t ever budge

The only answer you’ll ever get is, ‘love’ lol

But if somehow something didn’t quite turn out right, she turns it into baby food for JJ

This little chunkster eats anything and everything, he’s like a little vacuum or something lol

And with how resourceful Dina is, she makes sure to plant the seeds she finds in any fruits/vegetables

You’d be surprised how much of that actually grows lol

Dina incorporates all the Jewish heritage she remembers from her mother and sister

But I feel like Dina would take a spin on it, she’d have foods that you’re supposed to have exclusively during Hanukkah all year round, and she would have things like a Christmas tree and stockings hanging on the fireplace

And Dina would make sure to say some sort of grace before dinner everyday

She loves learning more about her ancestors, but her favorite part about it is the food

Especially during Hanukkah, Dina loves cooking for you and JJ

Surprising Dina by planting Apple trees, so she can make honey-dipped apples every year in honor of her sister

During those eight days, she wakes you up with the smell of fried potatoes

You go downstairs with JJ on your hip, and find a bigass plate of latkes sitting on the table

Dina’s standing at the sink, and once she notices you and JJ are up, she turns to you and smiles, “What’s up you little goobers? I hope you’re hungry,” Dina then grabbed a washcloth and dried off her hands as she made her way towards the two of you

Dina giving you and JJ forehead kisses before she serves breakfast

I’m Polish, they’re called potato pancakes

That’s basically what they are, it’s shredded potatoes that are fried, and they’re usually served with applesauce or sour cream on the side

You and Dina make it a mission to figure out how to make homemade sour cream and applesauce lol

JJ’s most def the kind of kid that will stop fussing if a snack’s mentioned

Dina just gives him the homemade applesauce to stop his little tantrum

He’s got such a sweet tooth; he takes after his mother lol

Sneaking up behind Dina whenever she’s standing in front of the stove or sink, and say some dumb shit like, “What’s cookin’, good lookin’?” lmao

After you mention an interest in cooking with her, she gets so excited

She makes a date out of making dinner and desert together everyday

Even JJ likes helping out in the kitchen lol

Holding him on your hip and letting him watch and partake in the cooking process

Teaching JJ how to wash his hands, it’s so cute watching his little chubby hands run together under the sink lmao

And his little smile afterwards, like he’s proud of himself

Oml I’d die for JJ

You peeking over her shoulder whenever she’s adding her ‘secret ingredient’, you find you that it’s butter

So much fucking butter lol

Listening to music while you guys are preparing supper, and dancing together whenever you’re waiting on something in the oven

She’ll just grab your arm softly out of the blue and say, “Come’ere.”

Especially when it’s one of her favorites, or it’s a slower song

Dipping and spinning her just to hear her laugh

Oml her laugh is so genuine and cute, it makes your heart melt

But her favorite times are whenever JJ’s in somebody’s arms, his smile grows so big whenever he’s dancing with his parents

And his smile is so infectious lol

You guys make it a point to wash the dishes together after dinner

Taking turns between washing and drying off the dishes

And setting JJ on the counter so he doesn’t feel left out

#dina/reader #dina x reader #dina tlou #dina tlou2 #smashbrandiscooch #mine

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shunsuiken · 4 years

Note

could I request early morning/making breakfast hc's with their S/O with suga and hinata? Thank you :)

sugawara’s hc is pretty suggestive btw oops !!! couldn’t help myself 💀 thanks for the request anon <3

early morning & breakfast hcs with sugawara and hinata.

—sugawara koushi.

listen listen listen.

GOOD MORNING KISSES !!!!!! and he’ll only stop kissing you until you wake up so wakey wakey sweety

and if that doesnt wake you up then... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) hes just gonna have to whisper some dirty things in your ear until you’re out of that bed

you’ll pull the covers up to act as a wall between him and you and he just gasps “RUDE”

“shhh i’m sleeping” koushi is prolly gonna laugh at that lmao hes so lame but you love him for that<3

ok NOW youre finally awake and you go brush your teeth just to wash out the morning breath

sugawara prepares things in the kitchen

hes prolly the type to make pancakes in the morning

you’ll wrap your arms around his waist and put your chin on his shoulder

hes going to find it so cute that you’re just clinging onto him in silence like omg stop being so cute 😭🤚🏼

then you’ll surprise him by kissing his nape (im p sure this would be his weak spot HAHA) in revenge from saying dirty things to you earlier 🤪

now hes blushing and stuttering, 10 points to gryffindor!

when the pancakes are done cookin, you’ll drizzle maple syrup all over it or whatever topping you like

he WILL feed you. this is a fact.

OKAY OKAY if the topping you like is in liquid form i have the feeling he’d be the type to ‘accidentally’ spill some of it out of your mouth

because it’ll look like cum and we know sugawara is secretly a hoe

“koushi i know what youre doing STOP IT” “whaaat?? what am i doing??” bitch is gonna act so innocent and you’re just 💆🏻‍♀️💆🏻‍♀️

and if hes not gonna stop

then you’ll smooch him

with that liquid topping you like on your lips

cue morning make out session, hes glad you know what he wants :)

—hinata shoyou.

gotta be honest the baby can’t cook for shit 💀

like im sure he can cook RICE but anything other than that........ sis you better take the lead

for the sake of both your lives LMAO

okay so i feel like he’d be the type to be super clingy in the morning. esp if you’re not in the mood to get up

like he’ll attempt to pull you out of bed but you’re literally and spiritually attached to the bed so its gonna take a lot more than just his strength to get you outta there lmaoo

so now hes just hugging you and talking- rambling, hes rambling on and on about volleyball and how hes so proud of his team and omg its so cute??? like you can hear the sincerity in his voice and you almost feel like youre part of the team

then you’re like hol up 🤚🏼 and remind yourself you arent part of the team oop

your hand goes to shoyous hair just to run through it and hes like “huh?” and wtf it looks like hes got sparkles in his eyes

you smile at him “im so happy youve found your place, you havent sounded so happy in a while”

shoyou is just o.o and then hes like “of course!! im so grateful for my teammates” the look on his face is so precious do you SEE THIS SHIT DUDE

eventually you get out of bed and hes all yay!! because he gets to watch you cook and i know deep in my soul that he loves to watch you cook

like he doesnt know what the fucks going on but he sure does love looking at it

he firmly believes that you are a GOD when you cook

and i guess youre making an omelette or grilled fish and you tell shoyou he can make the rice and hes like yay!! he can help!!!

you guys eat happily and plan out the rest of the day together 💞

#haikyuu!!#sugawara x reader #hinata x reader #sugawara koushi #hinata shouyou #hinata shoyo x reader #sugawara koshi x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x y/n #hq x reader #hq headcanons #hq hcs #sugawara fluff #hinata shoyou fluff #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios

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lihikainanea · 4 years

Note

Can you imagine Tiger trying to cook a nice meal for her and Bill and accidentally giving the both of them food poisoning lmao

oh my god this made me laugh.

So look, I low-key love this idea that tiger is a great cook because it’s half self-projection and half just...I don’t even know what. I like the idea that both her and Bill are great cooks and battle for kitchen time. I love the concept that he prepares elaborate meals because it relaxes him, and tiger loves his cooking. But I also love the concept that Bill is obsessed with her cooking and craves it and when he’s finally back from a long time away, he just eats too much because its so good and he gets that delicious belly that we’re all fucking insane for. Tiger cooking for her man and her man craving her home cookin’ is an idea I am always here for.

But for the comedic factor, I also low key love the concept that tiger is a fucking terrible cook, but that every once in awhile she tries to be kind and repay Bill for all he does for her so she cooks for him and he’s just like....oh god. Please no.

And like, if she tries to prepare this big elaborate meal but half the shit is burnt to ash and half of it is uncooked and both get food poisoning from it? Oh my god, I can’t deal. It’s the last time Bill ever lets her cook, and it’s the last time she ever wants to cook.

When Bill gets back to set having lost a significant amount of weight everybody comments on his dedication and he’s just like “This isn’t dedication. This is one week of antibiotics from salmonella and a girl who tried to kill me.”

#bill skarsgard #BFF!Bill #bill skarsgard drabble

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desiraypark · 4 years

Text

Clyde x Sherri: Lil’ House Guest

I reversed the characters, not because Sherri is a “dainty lady” and Clyde is a “manly-man” but because I feel it is more in Clyde’s character to save “Babygirl” from a spider lol Clyde x Sherri (Non Linear Series) Characters: Sherri x Clyde Logan Content: Fluffy stuff; spiders Author’s Note: I can’t cook, so Sherri may or may not be cooking dinner wrong lmao. Also, fun fact: I actually wrote the House Tour AFTER writing this, but posted it before so you guys could have a better visual of Clyde looking up at Sherri from the living room lol

“Ahhh…” It wasn’t even a scream. It was a scream that tried to come out but turned into a low-pitched yelp. All Sherri wanted to do was cook up a nice lil’ dinner for her and her Honeybunch. It was actually his night, but she was just in that mood. Now, she wished he’d said “no, I’m cookin’, Babygirl” but alas...

She’d dropped some paper in the trashcan when she spotted the little culprit—a huge spider. Not as big as a tarantula—but bigger and creepier than she’d seen before. Some radioactive little fucker. And it moved fast, too. Sherri squealed and backed into the middle of the kitchen floor. Clyde was in the living room watching Attack of the Clones when he saw Sherri bouncing around in his peripheral. He looked up to see her backing up and squealing and carryin’ on. His eyebrows furrowed. “You alright, baby?” he asked. “IT’S A SPIDER!!!” she screamed. Clyde shook his head, chuckled, and walked into the kitchen to see what the fuss was about. He looked at the spider and Sherri swore that the spider looked back at him. “He’s a fat ol’ thang, ain’t he?” he asked. Sherri squealed again and closed her eyes. “I don’t wanna kill it, but I want it out of heeeeerrrrreeeeee!” Clyde laughed. “No problem, Babygirl.” He walked to the cupboard and pulled out a mason jar. Sherri watched him twist off the lid. “Oh, my God, what if it’s poisonous? No, Clyde. Go on and kill it!” Clyde scooped the spider into the jar. “Naw, I ain’t gon’ kill it.” He opened the back door and walked outside. Sherri rushed to the door and peeked out of its window. She watched Clyde open the jar and let the spider crawl out of it. Then, she pushed the screen door open and stuck her head out. “Throw that jar away!” “Baby. Really?” “Yes, really! You don’t know what kinda juice it had on its body.” Clyde laughed, but heeded her request. He walked to the side of the house and returned without a jar in his hand. “Wash your hands, baby,” she said, still creeped out. She rushed to the stove and checked on her fish. “I am, baby. What, you think I’m gonna turn into Spider-Man or somethin’?” Clyde let the hot water run. “I don’t know, but I don’t want you to get poisoned or anything.” She checked the other side of one of her fish pieces and turned the stove’s burner off. “I appreciate your concern.” Before she took her fish out of the bubbling grease, she went to the freezer and opened the door. When she reached in for a cold bottle of water, she felt something crawl against her shoulder blade. She jumped, screamed, and slammed the door closed, and Clyde pulled her in his arms—laughing. “That was me baby, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” “Get off of me, Clyde!” “I’m sorry, baby.” Sherri went on and had a laugh at herself, too.

#clyde x sherri #clyde logan fanfiction #clyde logan x oc

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deeznutzyomama · 4 years

Note

Hey are requests open? Can I have cartman x reader where readers cooking for him pretty please 🙏 love ya babes 💗

YES REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

It was a normal average day, you were cooking for Cartman since you lost a bet, whoever laughed at a family guy episode had to cook for Cartman, Cartman waddled into the kitchen with his fat lil legs “oi who the fuck are you” he asked rudely “im y/n” you said, glaring at him. “what the FUCK are you cooking” he said, walking closer to see what you were cookin, a little too close for comfort so you turned around and pushed him away, causing him to stumble back, almost falling (hah loser) “well dont get so close to me next time, fatass” you’d say, smirking and turning back to the stove, you were frying lettuce.

You wanted Cartman to go on a diet since he’s fat as fuck “I AM HUNGRY FEED ME NOW PLEASE I AM GONNA DIE IN A MERE 5 MINUTES IF I DONT EAT” cried Cartman, banging his fists on the table “oh stop being a baby” you would reply with, causing him to start whining in his stupid little bitchy voice “buuut y/nnn, im hungryy” he’d squeal “well you’re gonna have to fucking wait or else im gonna shove this fork so far up your nose its gonna get into your brain” you threatened, causing him to go silent “good.” you’d finish cooking, putting the lettuce on a plate, picking up the plate and setting it down in front of Cartman “yo what the fuck is this shit” he’d say, poking it with a fork “its ravioli” you’d say, trying to hide the fact that its actually lettuce.

“oh, okay” he’d say, eating the lettuce quickly, when he was done he noticed your ‘kiss the cook’ apron, standing up and kissing you on the lips!!!!!!!!!! ewwww, your cheeks turned a bright red, you opened your mouth to speak but instead he spoke “it said kiss the cook lmao” you’d look down at your apron “oh yeah” you’d say, still a little shooken up “lol i know that wasnt ravioli, i just ate it because you made it” he’d say “lol okay” you responded with, then you two got married and lived happily ever after

the end.

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eldritchsurveys · 4 years

Text

712.

Have you always known what you've wanted to do with your life, career-wise? >> By the time I really gave careers much thought, I was already old enough to know that it wouldn’t be feasible for me. So I never thought much about having one.

If you found out you couldn't bear children, would you be willing to adopt? >> Adoption would be the only option for us, if we really wanted to raise a child.

Can you not listen to a band if the singer sounds whiny? >> I mean, I don’t know. It’s possible a couple of the singers I listen to are considered whiny by someone, and I just don’t hear them that way myself.

Would you stay at a haunted hotel? >> I’d rather not tempt the fates like that. I’ve seen 1408.

Could you live without the Internet? >> I could, but I’d really rather not, thanks.

Do you always remember to bring a towel? >> If this is a reference, then heh, I get it. If it isn’t, then, uh, why am I bringing towels places? (Except the beach, I guess?)

Spiders: Kill them or let 'em go? >> I always let my children go. They deserve to live as much as I do. If I don’t want them in my home for some reason (or, rather, if Sparrow asks me to remove one), then I’ll just put them outside, no big deal.

How do you feel about Paris Hilton? >> I don’t have any feelings about Paris Hilton. She was cool in Repo! the Genetic Opera, though.

When drunk, are you: violent, crazy, clingy, talkative, or depressed? >> Tired, mostly. Which is why I don’t drink so much now. A buzz is quite enough for recreation, anything past that is just... lay-down time.

Do you know who is on the $5000 bill? (yes, it does exist!) >> I didn’t know it existed and I’m not curious enough about it to look it up.

What is the best HAND-MADE present you've ever recieved? >> ---

Do you Yahoo? >> Nah.

Have you ever TP'ed someone? >> Nope.

Have you ever gotten pizza delivered to your house that you didn't order? >> Nope.

What's the most disgusting thing you've ever encountered while at a hotel? >> Roaches, I guess.

What would you do if Hugh Hefner hit on you? >> I wouldn’t be anywhere near Hugh Hefner, thanks.

Is the price always right? >> What.

Do you smell what the Rock is cookin'!?!? >> Sure.

Are you gullible? >> I can be about some things, I’d imagine. But mostly I’m sceptical enough to survive.

What's the craziest rumor you've heard about Marilyn Manson? >> You know, the same one everyone’s heard, about the rib removal.

(Insert random song lyric of your choice here): >> No, thanks.

Does unneccessary punctuation annoy you? >> The only time it’s annoying for me is when people do it with commas. Like,,,,, like that. It’s because it’s associated in my mind with a certain trend of behaviour on tumblr (and maybe elsewhere, but it really took hold here) a few years ago that I found completely repulsive.

Do you know anyone who was born on leap year? >> I feel like I do, but I can’t remember who.

Do you follow a 5-second rule after dropping food on the floor? >> No, I follow a “how clean do I believe this floor is” rule, and it really only applies in my own apartment. Anywhere else, I just consider it a loss.

Do you think that only unclean people get head lice? >> Not at all.

What are you squeamish about? >> “Wet” chores (kitchen + bathroom), the bathroom in general, etc.

Are you skilled with balls? (like basketball or baseball, you perv!) >> No.

Did you take Flintstone vitamins or any others as a child? >> I don’t remember. Probably.

What types of things do you think the government is hiding from us? >> I don’t care to speculate.

What would you do if the Kool-Aid man busted through your wall? >> I can’t even imagine this happening.

Have you ever been to an art museum? Aren't paintings so cool?! >> Yeah, I’ve been to art museums. Paintings are very cool, I just don’t personally care for a lot of the ones I’ve seen in museums. Art being a subjective experience and all, you understand.

How do you like your soda: bottles, cans, or straight from the fountain? >> Bottles.

Do you recycle? >> No.

Can one person really make a difference? >> Sure. It just might not be the grand-scale one you wanted to make.

Which is worse: elevators or escalators? >> I’m not bothered by either.

Are you gonna make your momma proud? >> My mother is not interested in me.

Ring the bell for service or wait patiently for a minute first? >> Wait patiently for a minute first.

Boomerang or Cartoon Network? >> ---

Have you learned anything valuable today? Share it & make us all smarter! >> Everything I’ve learned today is about Silent Hill 4, so...

Do you memorize random facts? >> No. Sparrow is the good-at-trivia person in this household, I have no head for it.

What's your favorite kind of Doritos? >> I hate Doritos.

Do your parents have MySpace pages? >> ---

If you had a time machine, would you go to the past or to the future? >> I would not use a time machine.

What if Darth Vader was YOUR father? >> Wouldn’t be too surprising. I already have a history of not-the-best dads.

You're at the zoo. In what direction must you go first? >> I mean, it really depends on the zoo.

Do you honestly know how to play Monopoly or just make up rules as you go? >> I know how to play it, I’m just not interested in it.

If you know the answer, do you blurt it out? >> What is the context for this... school? N/A, if so. Be honest...ever peed in the pool? >> Honestly, never.

Do you ever fathom the amount of words in the English language? >> Yeah, it’s pretty remarkable.

Have you ever pulled a fire alarm? >> Nope. That’d mainly be a self-punishment, considering my sensory defensiveness, lmao.

Do brain teasers tickle, confuse, or fascinate your brain? >> Sometimes confuse and sometimes fascinate.

You're hungry. All there is to eat is stale chips. Eat 'em or not? >> If I’m hungry, of fucking course. You could do a loooot worse than just some stale chips.

Have you had your tonsils removed? >> No.

If Ashton Kutcher punk'd you, would you feel the need to punch him? >> I’ve never actually seen that show, so I don’t know how obnoxious the pranks are. But I’m going to guess they’re pretty obnoxious, and I’d probably want to punch someone.

Have you ever fallen off of a treadmill while walking/running? >> No.

Do ya speak gangsta, son? >> ... So, I speak AAVE as well as more standard English, yes, and I’d personally prefer it if people treated our dialects with a little more care and respect.

Do you drink milk right from the bottle/carton, or pour yourself a glass? >> I don’t drink milk.

Isn't Chef Boyardee awesome? >> Not to me. There’s something vaguely attractive about pasta that tastes like metal, because I’m chronically iron-deficient, but nah, I’d rather just suck on a penny.

Do you like marshmellows in your hot cocoa? >> I don’t drink cocoa, but if I did, I’d probably like it loaded up with marshmallows.

What reality show has been taken WAY too far? >> All of them.

If you were going on a trip, would you Mapquest the directions first? >> Heh, Mapquest.

Do you hide when Jehovah's Witnesses knock on your door? >> This has actually never happened to me. ...Mostly because having a door of my own for people to knock on hasn’t been a frequent occurrence, but also I just haven’t seen a lot of JWs out and about in recent years.

Did you ever think any of your teachers were HOT? >> Sure.

Doesn't it suck when you have a wedgie in a public place? >> Sure.

If you farted in front of your significant other, would he/she care? >> No.

White Castle: nasty or absolutely yummy?! >> It hits the spot sometimes.

When you burp at the dinner table, are you expected to excuse yourself? >> LOL “the dinner table”.

Must you grab a souvenir from almost everywhere you go? >> Not unless I see one I really like. Souvenir shirts and trinkets in New Orleans are an absolute art form, so I’m always down for one of those, but most souvenir stuff I see places are pretty uninspired IMO.

Have you ever walked out on a movie at the theater? Which one? >> No, but I’ve definitely wanted to at least once.

Did you enjoy making things out of Play-Doh as a child? >> I don’t really recall making anything out of it. I recall opening the container just to smell it, lmao. I also recall thoughtlessly leaving it exposed to the open air and finding it bone-dry days later.

#surveys #survey #random survey

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chloca-cola · 4 years

Text

Incidents

I've decided to pursue my idea of a polyamorous relation between Dante Meande and Vergil and here is the set up to that. It was written in a hurry 😅 and it's hella long

@minteyeddemon (I figure you'd wanna be tagged haha)

Word count: 2,321 ish (sorry I'm on mobile and can't do keep reading cut offs unless someone wants to tell me how anyway lmao)

INCIDENT ONE

Things couldn’t be running smoother at Devil May Cry with two extra hunters -Cassiel and Vergil- it seems the money really began to flow through. Meande took less jobs to stay back at the office to do her paperwork having way more of it now than just a handful of months ago, which left her at the office alone for several days at a time, which she both loved and hated. She loved that Dante’s business was finally looking to the brighter side, but she hated feeling so lonely sometimes.

Most days when she’s caught up on her work, she reads, but this particular day she decided to listen to her playlist of different cello arrangements. She closed her eyes, listening to the melancholic tones, absently miming the finger positions and the bow movements as she did so. Meande was so caught up in the action, she didn’t hear Vergil enter the shop, closing the door behind him, he turned to greet her, but stopped himself in favor of watching her. Having retained the memories of the days his human half spent with Meande, he remembered her telling him that she used to own and play a cello back in Fortuna and that the instrument had been destroyed in the attack.

As he watched her, he felt the same odd stirring he gets off and on when he's around her, it’s rare that he gets any kind of alone time with the quirky girl, so when he does, he tends to memorize everything that’s happening in that moment. He wouldn’t dare condescend to admit aloud that he’s grown quite fond of the shorter girl, which did annoy him in its own right, mainly because he knows she’s with his brother, which subsequently leads to the other part of his annoyance over the situation; Vergil feels Meande is a better fit for him. Dante doesn’t appreciate the finer things that interests Meande like Vergil would. Meande’s gasp finally brought Vergil from his thoughts.

“Oh, heya Dimples. I didn’t hear ya come in.” She was openly embarrassed over being caught, cheeks flushed a lovely shade of pink, causing her freckles to stand out more and she quickly paused the music, motioning for him to bring over the money he earned so she could get to work separating out the funds. He walked over to her desk, holding out the manila envelope for her to take.

“How long did you play?” He asked in his typical matter-of-fact demeanor, which Meande is finally coming to be able to decipher. before she had a hard time deciding if he was being patronizing or sincere, but has learned to watch his microexpressions between how he is when speaking to her versus speaking with Dante.

“I started at four years old, mom said she could see the music in me.” She scratched her shoulder shyly, letting out a small laugh. “Only to someone with psionic powers could a statement like that make any fuckin’ sense.” He gave her a smile and a chuckle, and she leaned her elbows on her desk, cradling her chin in her palms. “You should smile more, I really do like your dimples.” She complimented, which caused him to clam up and made his body tense, like he does every time she says anything sweet to him, and she giggled, having caught onto that fact quickly. His reticent manner was something she also had to get used too, especially after living with Dante who is vocal about many things he feels.

“Your eyes are enchanting.” He stated, rather bluntly, and it completely caught her off guard, causing her to lift her head from her hands. This was the first time Vergil admitted to liking anything about her, Meande was used to him using words like ‘tolerate’ and ‘endure’ when it came to how the elder twin felt about her. “When the early morning light catches them is my favorite. I really see the golden undertones then.” It was the most sincere statement he’s given her that didn’t come off as a lecture and she blushed again, playing with her fingers.

“T-thanks.” She stammered, but all Vergil did was nod as an answer and disappeared up the stairs , leaving Meande alone again. She smiled sweetly at his words, unbeknownst that she wasn’t alone, Cassiel and Dante were both at the door, seeing Vergil and Meande so involved in their own conversation they hadn’t even noticed them.

INCIDENT 2

Dante was over at Meande’s desk, finally having some down time, nuzzling and kissing on her neck, and she giggled, trying in vain to push him away so she could finish her work for the night.

“Meande.” Vergil’s nasally tone was unamused, and it caused the duo to stop what they were doing. Meande looked up at him, blushing but smiling at him, Dante straightened, sitting on the edge of her desk, turned so he could see them both.

“Verg, what’s crackin’?” She asked, picking her pen back up to get back to work.

“May have money from my account?” She looked up at him again, Vergil -like Dante- let Meande keep up with his money from his cuts from missions, and she smiled, nodding cheerily.

“Of course, it’s your money after all, you don’t have to ask me.” She flipping through the notebook that had his account information in it, until she found a page that had a balance on it. “What’s cookin’ good lookin’? How much are you needing?” She glanced back up at him, and noticed he was giving Dante several glances, knowing his twin was eager to know what he would need money for, and it made him seem reluctant to answer her. “Dimples...I’m gonna need to know, so I can properly subtract it from your books.”

“Around six hundred.” Meande fumbled her pen, it clattered loudly against the floor after it bounced off of her desk, as she and Dante both gaped at him, and he tucked his chin in annoyance at them.

“Jeez, Verg, you find a government hooker or somethin’?” Dante teased, finally breaking the silence, and Meande half laughed, moving to pick up her pen. Vergil shot Dante a highly unamused glare, which caused Dante to roar with laughter, and Meande sternly tapped Dante’s thigh with her pen.

“Sure, ok, Vergil...but if you don’t mind me asking, what is it for?” Meande inquired, knowing Vergil hardly ever touches his account, so he has more than enough that six hundred dollars wouldn’t be much. Vergil tucked his chin again, the lightest pink blush gracing his features and she quickly caught on and she gave him a cheeky grin. “Wait, hold the phone. Dimples, you've met someone, haven’t you? You’re buyin’ this special chick somethin’ really nice, huh?” He shot an annoyed glare at her this time, because sometimes she just sounded too much like Dante.

“As a matter of fact, yes.” He confessed, and Meande tried to hide the stab to her heart that admittance committed to her. She knew it shouldn’t hurt her, she’s happily in love with Dante, but there was just something about Vergil that just kept drawing her in. Dante folded his arms over his chest, eyes darting between the two, who were both oblivious to each others feelings.

“Well, well, she’s some really special girl, huh?” Dante interjected, an odd edge in his jovial tones, causing him to sound both teasing and annoyed at the same time, which caused Meande to look up at him, eyebrows quirked in confusion.

“Yeah, she must be.” Meande stated, subtracting the amount from his books, before turning in her chair to their safe, opening it and retrieving his money. “I really need to set you up for an account at the bank instead of keeping this here.” She muttered to herself as she counted out the money for him.

“I like you dealing with my money.” He stated, taking the money from her and she laughed, about to explain she still would be, but she brushed it off for now.

“What are you buying her?” Vergil looked between Meande and Dante.

“It’s a surprise.” He answered simply, before leaving them to their own devices.

“I’m sure it is.” Dante grunted, causing her to give him another confused look.

“I wonder who he met?” She asked him, and he shrugged a shoulder. “Ok, what’s wrong, baby?” She cooed, running her hand up his thigh, and he looked down at her from his perch, wondering if she was really this oblivious, or just pretending to be for him, but he quickly disregarded the thought when she stood and straddled his lap and began kissing his neck.

The next day, Meande was running back from the bank, having convinced Vergil his money would be safer there and that she was still going to tend to it for him, and a pop up rain shower now threatened to drown her. She was holding her empty satchel over her head to shield her dreads from the onslaught, digging in her jeans pocket with her other hand for her keys. Unlocking the door, she flung it open and hurried inside, slamming it shut behind her. She shook the satchel, freeing it of the water, moving towards her desk, but she dropped it on the floor when her eyes landed on the large gift leaning on her desk. A cello with an elaborately tied blue ribbon on the neck just below the nut. Honey eyes wide in shock and mouth agape, Meande gingerly ghosted her fingers over the polished wood.

“Do you like it?” Vergil questioned from behind her and she squealed loudly, thankful she doesn’t teleport or phase anymore from scares, and she turned to him, hand over her heart.

“Don’t sneak up on me like that.” She hissed, heart racing, but the irritation quickly ebbed when his question replayed itself in her mind. “You bought this for me?” She asked, smiling up at him gratefully, eyes shimmering as tears flooded them, and he nodded. “I’m the girl you needed the money for?” Another quick nod, and Dante emerged from the kitchen where he’d been eating leftover pizza, a slice still in his hand. He had seen Vergil bringing the instrument back, knowing all along that Meande was the girl his brother was talking about yesterday. Jealousy surged through his veins like icy gutter water, yet he was also happy that Vergil was slowly opening up to her. He had always known that they would get along if they had gotten the chance to meet, yet he couldn’t help but still be mad at himself for being so right. He didn’t know how to deal with what he saw blossoming before him, he wanted to say something, but what if this is just a friendship? It’s not like Vergil understands how friendships really work, so maybe there should be boundaries explained. "Vergil...I love it, but you didn’t have to buy me this.”

“I did.” He said, flatly, but he held a smile on his lips. “You deserve everything you desire.” Okay, Dante decided that this was not a friendship, at Least on Vergil’s part and he frowned, going back into the kitchen.

INCIDENT 3

Meande stretched, her shoulders and back aching from playing her cello for so long, enjoying finally having one again. Cassiel was listening to her daughter, laid on the couch, eyes closed, relaxing comfortably, while Vergil was sitting at Dante’s desk, admiring her playing. He observed her discomfort and he stood.

“Come with me.” He commanded, taking the cello and bow from her, replacing them in their case, before walking up the stairs. Meande eyed her mother, who shrugged.

“Go on, baby girl, I’ll man the shop for you.” Meande stood and quickly followed Vergil into his room, where he removed his coat and gloves, meticulously setting them on his dresser, and she froze in the doorway.

“Lay on the bed.” She blushed, eyes trailing up and down his toned arms, but she obliged, unsure of what was happening. “On your stomach.” She blinked and flipped over like she was instructed and soon the bed dipped from the pressure of Vergil’s knee and he straddled her back. She was about to protest when it dawned on her, he was repaying her back with a massage like she’d given him before. She blushed, this being the first time Vergil has actively touched her without her coaxing it out of him in some way. His kneading was a little rougher than needed, and he adjusted it with the noises she made. After several minutes, he finally got the pressure right and Meande began to purr, laying her cheek on her hand, feeling the tension leaving her body.

Vergil watched her profile as he worked, Meande’s purring very rhythmic and soft, and he smiled almost warmly, despite knowing he shouldn’t love her. He realizes that is what’s going on now, even if he didn’t want to admit it, but he let himself react to it. He leaned down to her, nuzzling his nose against her neck and up to her cheek, his own deep purring rumbling in his chest. Meande tensed beneath him, her purring ceasing and her honey eyes flew open in surprise.

Vergil lifted his head slightly, letting her look at him better, his own purring grew louder, and she blushed heavily at the look in his eyes. After a few beats, Vergil raised up slightly to allow her to roll over onto her back before he leaned down to nuzzle her again, and she closed her eyes, leaning into the gesture with her own nuzzles, her purring sounding again.

Dante leaned on the door frame with his forearm watching them nuzzling and purring like two dangerous house cats and he knew he needed to confront her about this tonight, before it got out of hand.

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