#hopefully with at least some degree of success

[withleeknow]

Can I req something for the milestone event with lee know using this prompt „time passes slower without you.”? ✨

navigation / masterlist / ko-fi

patience is a virtue, everybody knows that.

you know it too. the only issue? patience is a virtue that you don't have.

you're an impatient person by nature, born with an inherent restlessness within your bones that keys you up more often than you'd like to admit. in school, you were always thinking about your next degree. with work, you're always thinking about the next big thing, the future position you'll hopefully land once you gain enough experience. you're always waiting for something else, constantly looking forward to the days ahead instead of living in the now. it's a personal flaw, you're well aware of this.

it happens when it comes to even the most mundane things. what cafe should you try next weekend, even if you're not even half done with the caramel macchiato you're holding in your hands? what movie should you watch next, even if the one playing on your tv screen hasn't gone into its second act yet?

your impatience already flares up on a daily basis, but it's even more amplified and unbearable whenever minho is away. it doesn't help that he's often gone for weeks, if not months on end. you're always counting down the days until he's back before he's even out the door.

"just one more week, yeah?"

his words hang heavy in the silence of your bedroom. your phone is on speaker, set against the pillow next to yours so you could pretend like he's here with you when you close your eyes. you try to facetime every day even if it's only for fifteen, twenty minutes. just to catch up on each other's day and at least see each other for a while before you go to sleep. it's bittersweet, being able to look at him and hear him talk but only from the digital void of your phone.

even though you tend to hide from him how you really feel, how much you actually miss him and wish for him to be back by your side, you think it must still bleed through from time to time. be it the subtle way your voice drops during conversation or how your eyes glaze over with sadness just a little bit when you stare at his handsome face for too long on video call.

you know minho is trying to comfort you. he wouldn't be a very good partner if he can't tell that his own girlfriend is having a hard time without him, would he? and it's not like you bitch and moan any chance you get. no, you always try to hide it from him because it's not his fault that he has to be away sometimes, not like he's choosing to leave you just for the fun of it.

you know his gentle reminder is meant to mitigate your ache, but it only makes you be more aware of how time doesn't seem to pass when he's not here. the clock stops ticking the second he's gone, and you feel like you have to drag yourself through every minute of every hour and repeat the process for days and weeks and months.

"one week is too long," you say quietly. "time passes slower without you."

seven days. one hundred and sixty eight hours. ten thousand and eighty minutes. it's practically nothing compared to the time that has already passed, but that doesn't mean that you get to miss him any less even though it's only a two-hour flight away.

minho doesn't really reply directly to what you said. instead, he tries to distract you with anecdotes of his day - like a funny looking pigeon he saw on the street earlier or a cute photo of soonie that his mom sent him. it works a little. he considers it a success when you crack a smile and giggle at his theatrics.

he keeps the conversation light until you're biting back a yawn and he knows it's time to let you get some rest. even when you're saying your goodnights, neither of you mention what day it'll be tomorrow. you're sure that in the morning you'll wake up to messages from him - not entirely poetic because it's not his specialty, but they'll still be infinitely and wonderfully sincere. you don't bring it up in case he feels guilty, and you think he doesn't bring it up because the reminder that he won't be here might make you sleep restlessly tonight.

you fall asleep with a little bit of a heavy heart, and wake up when the sound of your doorbell ringing fills your apartment at precisely 7:06am. the other side of the bed still cold and devoid of your minho, but it's not the first thing that you notice like you do every morning.

no, the first thing that you register today is the vivid discomfort of having your peace disturbed so early on when it should be a day that you get to spend feeling nothing but comfort and contentment. or at least, as content as you can get without minho here. you carry that irritation with you all the way to the front door, wild bedhead and all.

the door swings open.

you're a deer in the headlights and suddenly your displeasure is vanished, gone in a second like it was never there to begin with.

"surpriseee!"

a sheepish greeting.

you rub your eyes, then pinch yourself on the arm.

you're not really sure what happens next. it's all just a blur of tears and ugly sobbing as you launch yourself into his arms, almost making him knock into the suitcase that's still perched right beside him. the bouquet of peonies in his hand becomes an unfortunate victim as it falls to the floor after the impact, but minho leaves it be, in favor of holding you as tightly as you're holding onto him.

his fingers tangled in your hair, your arms wound around his neck securely like you're afraid you're still dreaming and he'll disappear if you let go. you don't question why he's here; you just accept that he is.

minho peppers warm kisses to your cheeks, your jawline, your forehead and your lips. it's graceless and it's damp from your tears but neither of you could bring yourself to care. he murmurs with an upward quirk of his mouth where he's pressing his smile to your lips, all affection, all love. "happy birthday, baby."

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all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 28.03.2024]

#stray kids fic #stray kids imagines #stray kids x reader #skz fic #skz imagines #skz x reader #skz x you #lee know fluff #lee know angst #lee know scenarios #lee know x reader #lee know imagines #lee know x you #lee minho x reader #lee minho x you #stray kids #lee know #lee minho

[steddieas-shegoes]

Request: ok so listen; so Steve Harrington who didn't tell anyone he gets into a medical school (Indiana University School of medicine) but he travels to school during the week and Mike finds the graduation letter in Steve's apartment. He graduated as a premed student with a full scholarship to Harvard Medical school for the trauma surgeon program. The party realizes that their constant jokes making fun of Steve's intelligence caused him to not tell them about this. I want a mixture of angst with a full proper apology & a few years later him graduating from Harvard with the party cheering him.

MY LOOOOOOVE!!!! Nothing gets me going quite like a secret super smart Steve Harrington. Is it OOC? Maybe. But writing Steve as a fucking Harvard Med School graduate!!! A whole trauma surgeon!!!! YES!!!!! I obviously had to put some Steddie in there, mostly because Eddie deserves a happy ending, too and any chance I have to give him one, I will. - Mickala ❤️

---------------------------------------------

Steve was late. He’d been late a lot recently.

Mike started driving a few weeks ago, got his hands on Nancy’s car since she was busy traveling the world now, and he’d been quick to pick up the slack.

But he was growing impatient.

When they asked Steve why he was late, he shrugged it off, said he forgot. Everyone just went with it because obviously Steve’s kind of scatterbrained and a few fries short of a happy meal, especially after the head trauma.

But Mike was suspicious.

Steve let it go a little too easily.

And Eddie hadn’t stuck up for him like he usually did when they were teasing his intelligence.

Mike was letting himself into Steve’s apartment, using the key that he kept under the mat so the kids always had a place to go if they needed it.

He wasn’t home yet, but Mike had just been to Family Video and he wasn’t there either. Apparently, hadn’t been in at all today. Keith said something about ‘taking the day off for exams.’

Steve wasn’t in school though, so that meant he was lying and Mike wanted to know what he was lying about.

He looked at the counter, saw a large stack of mail, and decided that was probably a good place to start his search.

Most of it seemed like junk, a few bills, a letter from Robin, and an envelope that was torn open already from Indiana University.

If it was already open, it was fair game. That was his motto, at least.

He pulled out a thick stack of papers.

The seal in the corner of the first page said School of Medicine.

Was Steve sick? Had he started seeing the university doctors because of some weird problem with his head? Maybe that’s why he’d also been so forgetful lately.

Maybe they put him on a new medication trial or something and it was a side effect.

But he kept reading and felt his chest cave in.

Dear Mr. Steven J. Harrington,

It is a great honor to announce your successful completion of the pre-med degree program at Indiana University. Your incredible tenacity has proved that you’re prepared to work through any medical school program in the country.

Graduation is currently set for May 18, 1989. Please contact your advisor to reserve tickets by April 28, 1989.

Thank you for trusting Indiana University with your education. We look forward to seeing your accomplishments in the future!

“Holy shit.”

“Why are you reading my mail?”

Mike jumped at Steve’s voice. He’d been so busy reading the letter, he hadn’t heard the front door to the apartment open.

“You’re going to med school?”

“Hopefully, yeah.”

“What the fuck?”

Steve rolled his eyes and made his way to the fridge, grabbing a can of soda for himself.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, like. You’re. You’re you. How are you going to med school?”

Steve’s brows furrowed as he leaned against the counter and sipped at his drink.

“I graduated from pre-med as valedictorian. I’m not sure what you’re asking.”

“You? Valedictorian? You barely got through high school!”

Steve rolled his eyes.

“I hated high school. I was going through a lot of shit. It wasn’t because I’m stupid.”

Mike’s mouth was gaping like a fish, confused at literally everything that was happening.

“But-“

“I also just got into Harvard on a full scholarship if we’re gonna put it all out there. I was gonna tell everyone this weekend at El’s birthday party but I’m sure you’re about to run to tell them all.”

Well, how could he not? Steve had been hiding going to college for years! He was about to move to Harvard!

“Wait! Is Eddie going with you?”

“Yeah. We found an apartment over a record store and the owner hired him to run the store while he transitions into retirement.”

Mike felt like he was in an alternate universe. There was no way Steve Harrington was going to be a doctor. There was no way Eddie and Steve were moving to Boston.

There was no way he was leaving all of them.

“But. But what about us?”

“You guys are all practically adults. You barely even hang out with me anymore unless it’s to get a ride or get snacks for Hellfire. You didn’t even notice I was driving to and from campus for years. I think I’ve given enough of myself to people who don’t seem to want it,” Steve shrugged, looking down at the floor.

Mike wanted to scream, he wanted to cry, but he also kind of just wanted to hug Steve and tell him that wasn’t true.

But it kind of was, wasn’t it?

They’d all taken advantage of Steve’s kindness for years. He’d been the best damn babysitter they could have, saved their lives multiple times, gave them money for the arcade and dates and pizza for pool parties when he lived in his old house.

They grew to just expect it.

He didn’t even know the last time he’d heard anyone say thank you. He certainly hadn’t said it in a long time.

“But, Dustin will be devastated.”

“He’ll be okay. He’s gonna go to MIT when he graduates and he’ll be right around the corner or something. I dunno. He hasn’t even called me just to talk in months. I don’t think he’ll miss me that much.”

Which just. It wasn’t true. Mike knew for a fact that Dustin would be heartbroken about Steve leaving.

“I.”

“It’s fine. Eddie’s gonna be home soon so if you wanna wait for him that’s fine. I’m gonna go shower and get an early night. Been up since three this morning.”

“Did you really have exams?”

“What?”

“I checked to see if you worked today and Keith said you had exams,” Mike said shakily, feeling entirely off balance.

“Oh. I just had to do an entrance exam for Harvard. They let me take it on IU’s campus since I can’t move until two weeks before classes start.”

Mike nodded once.

This was really happening. Steve was leaving.

Steve was going to Harvard.

He was taking Eddie with him.

And not a single one of them had bothered to notice any of it happening.

————————

“I told you I don’t know! I’m giving you everything I have!” Mike yelled at Dustin, who was pacing and clearly trying not to cry.

“It just doesn’t make sense! He always acted like he didn’t understand half of what we were saying when we talked science stuff!” Dustin yelled as he walked back and forth across the floor, wearing a pattern into the carpet.

“Maybe it’s because we’ve always just assumed he’s dumb. I mean, none of us really treated him like he could keep up, so maybe he just. Didn’t,” Lucas shrugged.

“He could’ve told us!”

“Or maybe he didn’t want to since we all thought he’d be lying,” Max added from her chair in the corner.

“He could’ve proved it!”

“Maybe he didn’t want to have to,” Eddie said as he walked in the room.

Hellfire was at Dustin’s tonight, and Eddie had been late.

His sudden appearance made them all cower where they sat or stood.

“No Hellfire tonight. I was gonna call, but had to drive by here anyway. Steve’s having a bad night and I’m pretty certain it’s your fault, so I’m gonna go try to get him through it.”

It was a bit harsh, but not undeserved.

“Why didn’t you tell us, Eddie?” Dustin asked quietly.

“It wasn’t for me to tell. He was going to when he got accepted into IU, and then you guys spent most of that night telling him he wouldn’t understand what you were talking about with your group science project so he kept it to himself. Then he just decided it wouldn’t be worth trying to explain anything since you wouldn’t believe him anyway. He asked me not to say anything until he announced his graduation and Harvard this weekend, so I didn’t.”

“But we would have been proud of him! He could have shown us his acceptance letter or something.”

“That’s not how you made him feel,” Eddie shrugged before turning back towards the door. “We’ll see you at El’s party.”

When Eddie left, the room was silent.

Everyone was deep in thought, trying to unpack everything.

With Hellfire canceled, they didn’t have much of a reason to stick around, but none of them felt like being alone.

Not when they started to realize that Steve was kind of the glue that held them all together and without him, they may not ever be whole again.

—-----------------------

El’s party was simple, just the usual guests and some cake and balloons. She didn’t like a big thing, usually preferred to have a sleepover with Max and just do their nails and listen to music.

Joyce insisted on having a little get together though, said it would be nice to celebrate something since they hadn’t really since Will’s birthday.

Steve was there, holding Eddie’s hand in the corner, talking with Hopper while Eddie talked with Joyce.

Steve told them everything when they got there since the kids knew, and while he knew Joyce and Hopper were happy for him, for both of them, they could send their shock.

All of the kids had hesitantly hugged Steve when they got there, barely saying anything to him, unsure where they stood.

Steve felt like he was closing the book on his life in Hawkins, and he hated that it felt like no one would join him in the next one except for Eddie.

Throughout the day, the kids would find their way up to him to just be close, soak in Steve’s energy, try to appreciate him now because they clearly hadn’t been before.

He let them. He could have told them to go away, or tried to talk them into apologies, but it wouldn’t do any good right now, and he didn’t want to ruin El’s birthday party.

Eddie could tell he wasn’t himself, though. He saw the way Steve’s eyes dropped down to his lap every time one of the kids would walk away from his side, how his leg started bouncing when things were quiet for more than a few seconds.

“You wanna head out?”

“I-”

“Steve? Can we talk to you for a minute?” Lucas asked, the rest of the party behind him watching with wide eyes.

“Oh. Sure.”

Eddie patted his knee and stood up, but Lucas gestured for him to sit back down.

“You, too. We owe you both explanations and apologies.”

So, Eddie sat. He would support Steve through whatever this conversation entailed, and maybe get something else out of it too.

“We all want to take turns saying stuff, but I wanna start,” Lucas said, playing with his hands nervously.

Steve nodded, always more patient than the kids deserved.

“I always saw you as the jock, ya know? Like, I respected you because you were a great basketball player and you had a lot of friends. I just kind of thought that was who you were, even after high school. You always made time to help me over the summer, even when you’d just worked an opening shift or had to go in for a closing shift. I didn’t really consider you an adult, even though you were. You were just there. You protected me, all of us, from some of the scariest shit any of us will ever have to deal with without even taking a second to consider your own safety. You just did it. And I don’t really think any of us thanked you. None of us would be here without you.”

Lucas was biting his lip, trying not to cry as he wrapped up his speech, but didn’t get a chance to start before Will started talking.

“I haven’t spent as much time with you as the rest of these guys have. But I know that you’re always there. You give me a ride when my mom can’t and you always slip me an extra $1 or 2 when we go to the arcade because you know I don’t have much. You hung up my art on your apartment wall even though it sucks and isn’t your style because you wanted me to know that someone supports me. You’ve been one of the only constants in our crazy lives, and we haven’t done nearly enough to show that we appreciate you,” Will wiped his eyes quickly as he turned away to let someone else speak.

“Billy was an asshole to all of us, but especially to you. You could’ve walked away that night, left Lucas and me to defend ourselves or die trying, but you didn’t. You knew he was a racist piece of shit and you got another concussion just so he wouldn’t lay a hand on us. That was the first time I ever had someone stick up for me like that. And after everything with Vecna, you were the one who always checked in, made sure I had rides to appointments, had food I could easily make when my mom wasn’t around, brought me to the skate park as soon as I was cleared by my doctor. I’ve never had someone who cared so much like you do and I’m sorry I didn’t know how to show you that it meant so much to me,” Max said seriously.

Steve was sniffling, and Eddie knew if he tried to comfort him too much right now, it would just make it worse. He squeezed his hand and wiped the tear falling down his cheek as the kids continued.

“I hated you for the longest time. I thought it was your fault Nancy changed, and then I thought it was your fault when Nancy and Jonathan got together, and then I just hated everyone and everything for a while. But I think it was just easy to use you to blame everything on because you let me. You just let me treat you like shit. You let me complain about your driving while you drove me anywhere I wanted to go. You let me blame you for Nancy being upset about the break up when she was the one who hurt you most. You let me think you were stupid when you’re brilliant enough to go to Harvard on a full scholarship. You let all of us take advantage of you and I don’t know why, but I wish I could turn back time and not let you do that. You didn’t deserve to be used by any of us, but especially me,” Mike said surprisingly sincerely.

In fact, Eddie watched Mike take a few deep breaths like he was holding back a sob.

“I am sorry for how we all treated you, Steve. I did not know that we hurt you. Dad said sometimes the people who hurt the most are the people who accept hurt as the way they are supposed to be treated, but that is not true. You should be loved so much, like Eddie loves you, by everyone. We should have done better,” El said as she held Max’s hand.

Dustin had been incredibly quiet, hiding in the back, not even looking up from the ground. Eddie could tell he wanted to say something, but probably didn’t know how to start.

It was no secret that Dustin was Steve’s favorite kid. It was also no secret that Dustin loved Steve like a brother, maybe even more, and that if Steve was upset, Dustin would want to make it right.

“I never had someone to look up to until you came around,” Dustin started, still not looking up from the ground. “My mom always felt bad that she didn’t give me a good role model or a brother or sister to look up to. But when you started watching over me, she felt like it was better this way. ‘That Harrington boy is special.’ That’s what she says all the time. And I guess I got used to her saying it and just didn’t think anything of it anymore. Like, yeah, you’re great. You do all kinds of stuff for me and for all of us, but it just felt like you wanted to so what made it so special? When Mike told us everything, it hit me that even if you wanted to do all that stuff, you still deserved a thank you. You went out of your way to make us safe and happy, and our only way to repay you was to constantly put you down and bully you. We spent years calling you out for what an asshole you were in high school while we ended up being assholes to you. You’re my brother and I haven’t been good to you. I’m sorry.”

Eddie was watching as Steve finally let out a sob he’d been holding in for too long. He pulled him into his chest, watching as the kids all wiped tears of their own away.

He knew the kids were genuinely sorry, he could tell that when faced with the reality of the way they treated Steve for years now, they felt terrible. But he also knew that Steve let it go on too long without saying something, and that it would take a while for him to really figure out a good balance of being there for the kids he loved and setting boundaries he needed to set long ago.

“Can you give him a minute guys? I’m sure he wants to talk to you all, but I think he just needs to calm down.”

The kids all nodded and scurried away.

They weren’t kids anymore, was the thing. They would always be kids to Steve, though. That’s why this was hurting so much. They were his nuggets, and they’d been unintentionally hurting him for years.

Steve had been so excited to tell them about getting into a pre-med program at IU, and when he couldn’t tell them, he changed. He was withdrawn in ways Eddie had never seen or expected. He was focused on school, and their relationship, but nothing else. He would go through the motions of driving the kids where he could when he could, throwing the occasional pool party, keeping up appearances.

He’d been exhausted for two years now. Running on fumes for miles, no end in sight. Until he got his acceptance into Harvard.

Eddie had never seen him so happy or proud of himself.

But the happiness faded quickly when he realized what telling the kids would mean, what going to Harvard would mean.

It meant moving, it meant leaving the kids, it meant spending the next 6-8 years so focused on school and residency that he probably wouldn’t have time to visit much outside of major holidays. It meant hoping that Eddie would come with him, support him, and love him regardless of the limited time he had to spend outside of school.

But Eddie would be there for every moment. He’d worked so hard, and Eddie wanted to be there for him every step of the way.

The kids would understand. They were almost graduated at this point, probably heading off to college themselves, and had their own lives to start.

“I wish I’d just told them about IU.”

“I know, sweetheart. But we can’t change the past. You’ve got such an amazing future ahead of you. Everyone is gonna be so proud of Dr. Steve Harrington.”

Steve smiled at that as Eddie dried his tears away.

When he’d calmed down completely, he walked over to where the kids were sitting on the porch.

He stood in front of them with his hands on his hips, a small smile on his face.

“If I forgive you all, will you stop looking like I just stole your ice creams and kicked your puppies?”

Dustin was the first to jump up and run into Steve, sobbing when Steve’s arms wrapped around him.

“It’s alright, bud. I love you, even when you’re a shithead, okay?”

All of the kids piled into Steve’s arms and around his back, all of them crying as Steve started telling them all about his program.

“I’m going to be a trauma surgeon. I was always pretty good at patching everyone up after Upside Down shit, so I figured why not make it a career? And I placed so high on the entrance testing, they suggested I go for pre-med instead of the EMT program. One of my professors my first semester suggested being a surgeon, so that’s the track I took.”

The kids looked at him in awe, like they were seeing him in a new light.

Eddie thought maybe they were finally seeing the Steve he’d seen all along.

—---------------------------------

May 11, 1997

“Steven Joseph Harrington, MD, summa cum laude.”

The cheers from his group were so loud, but they all ignored the dirty looks from the surrounding family and friends.

Steve Harrington was a Harvard graduate, a graduate with the highest honors, a trauma surgeon who already accepted his first position in a nearby hospital.

Everyone was so proud of him.

Wayne and Eddie had arranged for everyone to either ride in a rental car with Wayne or fly in to surprise Steve for his graduation.

He could see Steve look up into the crowd when he heard the screams, could see the grin spreading across his face as he realized his whole family was here to support him, just as they had been for the last eight years.

Everything Steve wanted and worked for was coming together, and everyone who believed in him was here cheering him on.

He was the best damn babysitter those kids had, and now he’d be the best damn trauma surgeon Boston Children’s Hospital would ever have.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #the party #ficlet #request #steve is actually incredibly smart and this is my ted talk #eddie is about to become a housewife who works 'for fun' #that boston surgeon money is about to make steve his sugar daddy

[runningfrom2am]

achilles heel - I: Ben's Sister

summary:

Grace is the very opposite of her brother in every way. when she finally moves onto campus at UNC Chapel Hill, she feels like she gets to be her own person, make her own friends, and hopefully start a promising career in the museum industry, and maybe, one day, get married to her high school sweetheart and live the American dream for herself. Rafe Cameron however, upon their very first meeting, throws a wrench in her very perfect plan.

tags/warnings:

rafe cameron x fem!oc, rafe is giving very much homewrecker, fanon!rafe (kinda), college!au, friends to lovers, slow-burn (maybe?), minimal oc description, drug and alcohol use, mostly unedited, (these tags are not exhaustive, lmk if i should add anything!)

wc: 2.1k

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January 4th, 2019

B: i'll be at the caf in 10 if you want to grab breakfast before class

Her phone buzzes twice in quick succession as the screen lights up on the table in front of her. She leans over to read it, putting down her coffee mug and rolling her eyes slightly to herself. Grace had already eaten the same thing she always does, being frozen strawberries and whipped cream for breakfast, and is finishing up her first of several cups of coffee for the day when she receives this text from her brother.

g: okay, back table in the corner

She sends her quick reply and goes back to what she was doing, pretending to read her textbook and hoping to absorb at least the key points before her eight am class. So far, this method has worked well for her. Only one semester down so far, but with a 3.91 GPA, Grace is feeling pretty good about her academic career.

Her brother, Ben, on the other hand, got into the same school on a scholarship for soccer, and Grace is pretty positive he's only doing the same degree as her so she can tutor him while he lives in a frat house. Which he very promptly moved into after orientation, leaving Grace on campus alone, and she didn't mind it one bit. Having some space from her brother and her parents for the first time has been amazing.

Grace looks up as her disheveled-looking brother slides into the seat across from her at the table, practically throwing his plate down. She removes her headphones to hear what he's saying. "Huh?" She asks, prompting him to repeat himself.

"I said..." He draws it out, clearly frustrated his sister didn't listen. "You're already reading that? It's only the second class."

"Oh, well yeah, they're assigned readings for a reason." Grace replies, putting in her bookmark and closing the book, shoving it in the bag at her feet before looking back at her twin brother. He looks like he just rolled out of bed, which, of course, he did.

"Right. Give me the summary then, yeah?" He asks through a mouthful of cinnamon and sugar toast.

Grace sighs a little. "So, basically, there's this guy, totally a dick." She begins to explain and Ben nods, but he's already looking down at his phone. "So he shoots this elephant, right, and then someone else shoots him, and then that's how the third world war started."

"Wait, what? Really?" Ben asks, his attention suddenly drawn back to her.

"No. There was no World War III, dumbass." She replied flatly, crossing her arms over her chest. "Do you even know what this course is about?"

"Not yet but that's why I'm here isn't it?" Ben chuckles, taking another bite of his toast and instantly chasing it down with his orange juice.

Grace cringes a little as she watches that. "Not exactly..." She replies, looking down at her watch. "We have fifteen minutes. We should probably go, we have to get all the way across campus."

Ben nods and shoves the rest of his one piece of toast in his mouth and picks up the other to carry with them while they grab their bags and clean up the table.

No one really knows what it is about the first week of the semester, but Grace, as well as every other girl she's seen so far, has fallen victim to the idea that you need to look put together and organized knowing damn well that by two weeks from now, she'll be showing up in pyjamas. But today, for the time being, she's actually wearing jeans and makeup to class.

They walk across the beautiful campus that overlooks the city from a hill. It's January, but the sun is rising and there's hardly any snow left on the ground, not that there ever was much to begin with at UNC. Grace grips her coffee cup with both hands to try and warm them- it was probably an oversight to leave her gloves back in her dorm.

They make it inside and find their classroom, walking in and looking around, scanning to see open seats. Grace's eye lands on a table with two seats that no one is sitting at, and makes a beeline for it, placing her bag down before realizing her brother isn't at her side anymore.

"Hey, man, how's it going?" She hears as she looks back over her shoulder, seeing her brother grabbing the hand of a boy sitting in the back row. She sighs and sits down as he sits in the back with someone she's assuming he knows from his frat or soccer or something,

"I'm pretty good. Don't know why I took an eight am but here I am I guess." Ben's friend, Rafe, says as Ben takes a seat next to him.

"Honestly, same." Ben laughs slightly, pulling his laptop out of his bag and placing it on the desk.

"Hey, uh..." Rafe starts, leaning closer to his friend and lowering his voice. "Who's that girl you came in with?"

"Why?" Ben asks, taking on a defensive tone as he digs around in his bag, looking for his textbook.

Rafe instantly shakes his head, leaning back in his seat. "Just wondering." He says quickly, looking forward at the long-haired girl sitting a few rows in front of them. "I didn't know you had a girl- I just thought you would have told the team."

"What? I don't." Ben looks up at him to see his friend staring at his sister. "That's just Grace. My sister." He admits, leaning back in his chair as well.

Oh, his sister. Rafe thinks to himself, nodding slightly in response to his friend, that was now watching him, watching his sister. Time to look away. "You have a sister?"

"Uh, yeah, dude."

"You never talk about her," Rafe says, glancing back at her.

"Not much to say I guess." Ben shrugs in response. "Uh, we're twins, I don't know she likes to read apparently. She's a history major, she lives here on campus. I don't know what really there is to add."

"Oh, really? I was thinking of doing history."

Ben laughs. "Dude, as if Ward would ever let you even think about taking anything other than business. Pretty much the only thing you can do with history is write or teach, that's boring as hell."

Rafe sighs, he knows Ben is probably right. "I mean, like, I wouldn't hate that. At least it would be my choice."

"Yeah, I mean, whatever you want man. Why not, right? Being a prof makes bangin money too. People respect you and shit-" Ben rambles on but Rafe isn't really listening. His eyes are trained again on the girl sitting closer to the front of the room, as her hair cascades over her shoulders when she leans forward more, writing something down in a notebook.

"Right?" His thoughts are interrupted.

"Oh, yeah, totally." Rafe nods, completely unaware of what his friend was talking about by now.

"Okay, so we've got some new faces in here today." A man who Rafe assumes to be the prof says, clapping his hands together to get everyone's attention as the room quiets down. "You, in the back there. You missed introductions on Monday, so basically we all shared our names, our majors, and what year we're in if you'd like to share as well."

He's looking dead on at Rafe in the back, and everyone's heads turn to look at him. "I, yeah, sure. I'm Rafe, uh, this is my first year, so I haven't made any big decisions yet, but I'm thinking about majoring in history." He says, making eye contact with Grace and giving her a slight smile.

"Right, yes, Rafe Cameron. You're on the soccer team with Ben here. Your dad is Ward, right?" The prof asks and Rafe nods.

"Yes sir."

"I've met your father, he's a really nice man, hey?" He grins and Rafe nods again slightly in response, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. "Anyway, let's get started, shall we? Did everyone get the readings done?"

——

Grace gets up at the end of class, placing everything in her bag and her headphones back in, assuming that her brother would take off with his friend.

"Shouldn't we wait for Grace?" Rafe asks Ben as his friend turns to the door.

"Nah, I'll talk to her later." He shrugs in response. "Come on- we've got practice this afternoon and I want to have a nap first."

"Hold on one sec," Rafe replies, holding his hand up at his friend signaling for him to wait, and watching as Grace turns around evidently surprised to see them still standing there looking at her- waiting.

"Oh, hi." She says, removing one of her headphones.

"What did you think of the first real lecture? Did you write down every word?" Ben asks her and she laughs a little.

"No, but I'm glad we're getting into something interesting at least." She replies, avoiding eye contact with his friend, who's watching her intently.

"Hey, uh, I'm Rafe, by the way." He says to her before Ben can get a word in.

Grace looks briefly at her brother, who is staring at Rafe with an indecipherable look on his face. "I'm Grace." She says, looking back at her brother's friend and smiling politely. "You said you want to take history? That's my plan too." She adds, making an effort to move the conversation along so they don't just all stand there staring at each other.

"Yeah, I mean, maybe. My dad wants me to take business because he owns a company and I'll have to take it over eventually and all that crap." Rafe shrugs as the three of them head for the door.

Grace nods at that, shoving her hands in her pockets as they walk out the door and down the hall. "My boyfriend was supposed to take business too, or that was originally his plan in high school. He decided to go into chemical and electrical engineering instead and he's loving it, but I guess it's a bit different than your situation but I still think it's important to do what you want, not what other people want you to do." She shrugs, as Rafe looks at her brother, giving him a 'what the fuck, man?' expression.

Ben raises an eyebrow at him, the silent exchange finished with his confusion, and Rafe quickly continues his conversation with the girl who wasn't watching them, eyes straight ahead as she walked. "Yeah, I guess you're right. My plan right now is to sell it as soon as my name's on it, so my degree won't really matter."

"Yeah, you probably don't need a degree in business for that." She agrees, laughing slightly as she shakes her head.

As the three approach the end of the hall, Rafe takes a few quick steps forward to grab the door, and Ben smiles at him, laughing slightly and patting him on the shoulder as he walks through. "Thanks, bro." He steps outside, leaving Rafe to stare at the girl who took a turn down the hall instead of following them out. 

"Not going back to dorms?" He asks her, making her turn as she continues to walk backward staying with the flow of other students.

"I have a class in C building in ten minutes- this way is much faster. It was nice meeting you!" Grace smiles with a slight wave, popping her headphone back in as she turns around and continues down the hall. Rafe smiles back and raises his hand in a quick wave, sighing as he's stuck holding the door for a few more people before he can follow Ben.

"Dude, you didn't think to tell me she has a boyfriend?" Rafe asks, jogging slightly to catch up with his friend.

"Sorry, didn't think you'd be into my sister. Didn't think it mattered- that's not like, the most important thing about her, you know." Ben scoffs, shaking his head.

"Well, of course not. Would've been nice to know, though." Rafe grumbles, adjusting his bag on his shoulder.

"You're not hooking up with my sister. Listen, even if she wasn't dating that loser I wouldn't let you. That's like, fucked up." Ben says sternly. "What would you say if I said I was into Sarah, huh?"

"Dude- gross. She's like, seventeen." Rafe shakes his head, scrunching up his nose at the thought.

"Exactly." Ben agrees. 

"Okay, well, that's different."

"You're digging yourself deeper and deeper man- you've just got to let it go." Ben insists, turning to walk towards his car on the opposite side of the parking lot from where Rafe parked his bike. "I'll see you at home!" He shouts back.

"See ya'," Rafe replies, walking in the opposite direction. He pulls the other side of his backpack over his shoulder, holding tightly onto the straps as he makes his way back to where he parked his bike- completely unaware that he was being watched through an upstairs window in C building by his friend's sister.

ahhh finally part one!! i’ve been working on this one for a hot minute so lmk all your thoughts and everything- i don’t have the whole thing planned out so also if anyone has any requests on where this should go, pls lmk!!

taglist: @madelynie @slut4drudy (message me or reply to this to be added!)

#rafe cameron #obx #obx fanfic #outer banks #rafe obx #rafe cameron x oc #rafe fanfiction #rafe fic #college!rafe #college!au #fratboy!rafe #frat!rafe #outerbanks rafe #rafe cameron fluff #rafe cameron x reader #rafe imagine #rafe outer banks #rafe x y/n #rafe x you #rafe x reader #rafe cameron fic #outerbanks

[cloudsandwichsoup]

general mp100 char headcanons,,(this’ll probably change in the future maybe,, i’ll update as i think of new ones)

shigeo “mob” kageyama

he/him

bi 100%

he’s quiet in most spaces and likes to listen but he rambles a lot when given the opportunity

he’s more talkative in general post canon but usually needs someone to start the conversation

he feels a little uncomfortable in fem clothes (because of the school break in incident) but would wear a skirt if asked (depends on who’s asking, will say no to reigen)

will wear anything teru buys for him

always the first player when playing video games

goes to s&s at least once a week to visit

teases his brother sometimes (but is the one mostly being teased)

the most normal little guy you’ve ever seen /j

arataka reigen

he/him

(disaster) gay

single father of 3 (tome, teru, shou)

married to serizawa

has a decent fashion taste when recommending things to others (but not himself all his clothes are ugly)

unofficially adopted teru and let him live in his apartment; serizawa (didn’t live with him at the time) convinced him into getting a bigger one because teru and reigen were super cramped

very proud of mob (cries when he graduates middle school)

slowly and painfully tries to be more honest (and causes more problems in the process)

can cook is just too lazy to do so

sings pretty well

doesn’t pay his rent on time

salt everywhere

ritsu kageyama

he/him

achillean (men liker syndrome)

“romance ew” but is also a hopeless romantic (shouromantic /hj)

homophobic but only towards reigen (and teru for liking his brother)

emo and listens to mcr and p!atd /hj

he talks about his fixations with mob

it’s hard for him to open up even post canon,, he still has the tendency to bottle up his feelings

he gets to 100% much easier then mob does since he has less patience

it isn’t as bad though

had a fursona (his drawing of it is crumpled up in his closet)

shou drew it for him once when he found a drawing of it lying around (ritsu wanted to die)

katsuya serizawa

he/him trans (im not projecting you are)

gay

goes to therapy (and forces reigen to go eventually)

tries to give helpful advice… to varying degrees of success

he’s shou’s better dad

sensitive to louder noises (like houses burning)

aware he’s severely underpaid but stays at s&s because of reigen (and the fact that he genuinely likes the job) they end up sharing finances so they should be fine… hopefully

he works multiple jobs (online and otherwise) to keep himself afloat before he gets married cause he really REALLY wants to stay at s&s

he gets a degree in psychology and expands s&s with counseling services

can be sarcastic when he wants to be

still anxious though he’s gotten a lot better (he’s learned how to look more put together and instead panics more internally)

the nerd ever

he rambles about his favorite games and shows to anyone that will listen

teruki hanazawa

he/they (hetheycore)

gay i don’t make the rules

his hair is naturally blond and his blue eyes are not contacts (i’m specifying this cause some people say otherwise) his parents are some european + japanese

he’s fem but in a masc way if that makes sense

hopelessly in love with kageyama shigeo,, he isn’t subtle about it at all (mob has his suspicions but doesn’t want to get carried away)

literally realized he didn’t like women after he met mob (more like after he realized liking boys was a thing after looking it up)💀

has one sided beef with tsubomi over mob’s affection, they became friends later I just think it’s funny if teru is jealous

has a hobby in fashion

reigen is his dad and they move in together post canon cause i said so

shou suzuki

he/him

pan

animal lover; hampter

art kid 💀

has ocs probably

he gets scared easily and is also sensitive to louder noises

serizawa straightened his hair as a kid (still does his hair just gives him his curly hair products now that shou wants to go natural)

got a buzz cut cause he absolutely ruined his hair after ironing it every day

honorary child of the arataka family

he visits people by breaking in through their windows

wants to kiss ritsu on the lips but he burned his house down so (he might burn it again if they kiss)

dimple

he/him

aroace king

“i am a male. i am a man. i’m a ‘he’. I don’t get into that… mentally ill shiz.” /hj

besties with reigen (but won’t admit it)

strange uncle to shigeo and ritsu

wants to attack teru for all of the atrocious outfit recs he gives mob

he tries to pick a fight with mob about his outfit when it looks horrendous (mob always wins)

babies ritsu a lot

follows tome to make sure she doesn’t get hurt and ends up enjoying traveling to weird places in search of spirits

tome kurata

she/her

sapphic

never stops loving aliens

becomes interested in figuring out how espers work

hates momo /hj

runs a spirit blog + a cringe yt channel with dimple

calls dimple “dimps”

crashes at reigen’s place cause she can

she pretty much lives there so she’s technically wawa and taka’s kid

her grandparents raised her… her parents exist lol

her grandpa was a conspiracy theorist and that’s why she got into aliens idk

probably takes over s&s when she’s an adult (kicks reigen out)

momozou takenaka

he/him swag

says he's straight only cause it's funny 💀💀

he had a crush on tsubomi but now likes tome against his will,, he thinks her passion is admirable and she didn’t treat him differently because of his abilities so… crush?

good friends with tsubomi, they complain about life together

actually really likes tennis

expresses his affection through subtle ways and tries everything he can to divert attention from said affection

hates tome /j

#mp100 #mobpsycho100 #malquease #reigen arataka #teruki hanazawa #shigeo kageyama #ritsu kageyama #serizawa katsuya #shou suzuki #tome kurata #takenaka momozou #dimple mob psycho 100 #mp100 ekubo #serirei #terumob #tomenaka #one sided tho #i hope i don’t regret this #some of my opinions are kinda wrong #probably

[kabillieu]

Because being in a military family means moving all the time, the Air Force hires movers to pack our things and load a truck. We're doing a partial move this time to help facilitate the sale of our house. So movers are here packing 80% of our things today and tomorrow, and then they'll load a truck and put our stuff into storage on Friday.

That will leave the weekend to rearrange what we have left, and then on Monday and Tuesday a painter and handyman will stop by to freshen up our paint and fix a few things. Then we'll get photographs and list the house.

I have never sold a house before, so I'm trying not to be the world's most miserable person through this process because I know it's awful for everyone, and we have people who are doing a lot of the work for us. The reward on the other end is a downpayment on our (hopefully) new house. It's amazing to see how investing (in the loosest sense of the term) in property is truly wealth-building. We bought two houses with VA loans, which means we didn't have to have a downpayment for either house. Now we're selling one and buying another (is my life Monopoly?) and because we have a lot of equity in the house we're selling, and because the house will likely sell for a lot more than we bought it, we'll have a nice-sized downpayment for this house we're buying in Alabama. Of course, the market is also much more expensive, but that doesn't change the fact that because we were able to buy one property, we can buy another, and so on as long as nothing disastrous happens to the housing market.

So many things about military service exist to give service members ladders into the middle class or even upper middle class. It's one of the last "companies" in the U.S. that you can use to facilitate an upward progression of socio-economic mobility. I really hitched a ride as spectator to this, even though it affects my life too obviously, but Dominic was a college dropout with no family money or support who enlisted in the late 90s. Through military programs he was able to finish college, commission as an officer, and get two graduate degrees. Through the GI Bill, he's paid for some of his college, and the rest he can transfer to family members. When we bought our first house (the one we're now selling) we were poor and had no savings, but using a VA loan meant we didn't need a downpayment. And just like that we got our foot into the door (haha) of the housing market.

There's a lot to criticize about the predatory way the military can behave with poor, oftentimes people of color who feel like the military is a last resort, but I've also seen how the structure of the military can take someone bright and ambitious like my husband and give them the tools they need to be very, very successful. My spouse did not grow up with people who had the resources to give him a leg up. I did. But he didn't.

Anyway, now I'm just rambling, but I'm constantly amazed by how an institution I find so problematic can also be a shining example of American progress. It's very socialist! The U.S. military is THE most socialist institution in this country imo--or at least the biggest.

[littleblueberryartist]

Some future Percy Jackson headcanons :D

- He never grows facial hair. Yes this is partially because I don't like drawing facial hair but also I feel like Percy would just take one look at the mirror, realise that he looks like a splitting image of his dad and then shave the whole thing off

- Percy is the malewife trophy husband in this relationship. Yes I HC him with a job (I will get to that later) but it's about the vibes

Like he literally says this in Greek heroes!

He is the trophy husband to Annabeth's successful girlboss wife and he knows it! He does the cooking and cleaning!! (His mother is THE Sally Jackson so you better bet he cooks dam well too)

And I refuse to believe that he and Sally aren't like super tidy people after living with Gabe. Like ADHD disorganization real and true just like me fr but Percy would not let there be trash or bad smells /anywhere/

- Related to the above Percy does not drink

- Percy took a GAP year actually

- Like yes he does actually try and jump back into school like he does in ToA because he is tired of godly bullshit and craves normalcy. But my guy. That is a semester of content you missed along with current school AND you're still prepping for college AND you're still recovering from the war. Something something he does this as a distraction from everything but also because he genuinely wants to have normalcy but after burning out somewhere through the year he is convinced to take a damn break!!!!

- I think the road trip at the end of ToA can still happen but like, just them relaxing and exploring during the GAP year (also redesigning Olympus is Annabeth's BABY man she's putting that over school + she has worse school records than Percy because she's been year round at camp since she was 7 I don't think school convention matters that much to her actually)

- Anyway they take a well deserved break!! (And get therapy hopefully) So by the time they get to college they are in a much better place mentally <3

- With the accomodations from NRU for his learning disabilities Percy actually ends up doing really well and gets better grades than Annabeth! I am a believer of "Percy is smart it's just that he wasn't properly accommodated and also lacked interest in certain subjects" and "Annabeth is naturally gifted and never learnt to study because she coasts through school and wings her tests" (they're both just like me fr)

- Percy ends up picking Marine Biology as a major because he's not actually sure what he wants to study (he's never gotten the chance to think about what he wanted for his future because of the great prophecy) and thinks that "hey even if it's cliche it'll be easier for me"

Cuz like I understand the excitement of finally going to a school that accomodates you and having hope that you'll get an actual chance to succeed. But also school is still hard and Percy probably just wants to get through it too sjsjsjdj. So he doesn't think too hard on it and goes with the perceived most obvious and easiest option. (Also an option he's most likely to show interest in)

Okay! Rubs hands. From here I start talking about my marine rehabilitation center Percy hcs :) (this hc is heavily inspired by this post! I really looked at it a few years ago and never stopped thinking about it lmao)

- Something something Percy is canonically the kid who used to sneak out at night to help free sea creatures in fishing nets and is best friends with Grover "lord of the wild" Underwood and Rachel "activist" Dare. That boy is an environmentalist.

- He ends up finding genuine passion in ocean conservation and gets a degree in environmental conservation along with marine biology

- A while after graduating, he sets up a marine rehabilitation/conservation center of sorts

- Annabeth, who probably makes it big as an architect pretty soon (at least in the half-blood community) designed the building, Rachel helps to fund the whole thing. Grover, who goes around doing conservation work and setting up sanctuaries to help preserve the wild helps a ton with setting up too

- The center helps out both mythical and regular sea creatures. It also acts as a demigod safe house (something something Hazel + the Hecate kids help to set up wards to keep monsters out and also to shroud the mythical aspects of the place with the Mist)

- I dunno if the staff will be only consisting of people in the know or if there are mortals too but I feel like even though the wards at the center aren't as strong as those at the camps, the prospect of a safe working environment would be pretty enticing to demigods so a bunch of them end up interning there for a bit

- speaking of safe environment I feel like while Percabeth study in New Rome they wouldn't live there. Instead Annabeth ends up building something similar to it at CHB. But rather than a whole city, it's more of just apartments close to camp with various safe houses all over the country because I feel like they'd end up vibing in the mortal world more. (Much like this post!)

- The center holds educational field trips to encourage more people to care about the oceans. (I've been on a field trip to a marine rehabilitation center before, I think it'd be something like that but with a bigger, more advanced facility)

- I actually like the hc of Percy becoming an educator to help kids like him and also go full circle with the whole "why would anyone want to be a teacher for all time" thing with Chiron in TLT. But rather than become a teacher he ends up being an educator and advocator for environmental conservation. Might be invited to be a guest speaker at schools from time to time.

- Oh also he's still a teacher in that Percy teaches swordfighting and canoeing at camp send tweet

#pjo #hoo #toa #riordanverse #percy jackson #percy jackson and the olympians #headcanon #marine rehabilitation center!percy #aqua's ramblings #heeheehoohoo little do you know that this is also the set-up for my demisona meeting Percy

[soft-bellied-tannies]

Weight of Perfection

Read here or on AO3!

⚠️

This story has some deep emotional discussion including body image issues, self-esteem issues, childhood trauma, a narcissistic parent, and the struggles of maintaining a relationship through those things.

There is also an asexual character, a discussion of therapy, brief mentions of in vitro reproduction, and pregnancy.

Please consider everything before reading and skip if you believe it would be a difficult read! <3

⚠️

Jungkook couldn’t believe he was about to actually upload a profile to a sugar baby site, but he was officially desperate.

There was no way he was going back to Busan, jobless and mateless as everyone had claimed would happen. He knew choosing to pursue painting at Seoul Arts College was going to be a challenge, but the city had not been kind to the omega so far. 

Going through multiple barista and waiter jobs had been Jungkook’s way of providing for himself and as a single, young omega new to Seoul, people took advantage of him. Customers were rude, alpha coworkers made him uncomfortable, and managers were shitty. 

After finishing his degree, Jungkook knew it was not going to be an immediate jump into the art world, but he thought there would be some sort of opportunity that came up. He looked at museums, schools, and community centers for jobs, more than willing to clean studios and teach children’s classes to get his start, to no avail.

With his landlord constantly upping his rent and the less-than-successful job hunt, Jungkook knew his options were limited. His parents would be insufferable if he moved back into his childhood bedroom.

If working at restaurants made him anxious, the idea of becoming a stripper seemed pretty stupid. Omega shelters terrified him and he didn’t have a car to sleep in. 

Then, a random ad popped up on an employment search site. It had a well-dressed omega on the arm of an older alpha in a perfectly tailored suit with a bright white font that read ‘Sweet Tooth - The Ultimate Sugar Service’. 

Jungkook was confused at first, trying to figure out if it was some high-end candy company or one of those kinky services that infused slick into baked goods.

To this day, the omega had no idea why he clicked on the link, but something in his head was telling him it was the right thing to do. 

Three nights later, Jungkook found himself staring at his computer screen while the buffering circle spun - uploading his thoroughly crafted sugar baby profile. It took him hours to select the photos and answer all the questions, but he told himself that there was no backing out. 

This was his ticket to staying in Seoul and pursuing his dreams so Jungkook was willing to wade through filthy comments and old men in hopes of finding a semi-decent alpha to cover his rent and hopefully stock his art supplies. 

By the next morning, Jungkook already had a full inbox of alphas and even a few betas making promises of designer clothes and luxurious dates. Every single message also had disgusting comments on his body and requests for Jungkook to meet in hotel rooms. All things he had been unfortunately expecting. 

What he had not expected was a familiar name sending him a genuinely kind note with an ask to meet up for coffee. The phone almost slipped from his hand in shock when Jungkook clicked on the alpha’s profile, seeing the incredibly gorgeous and smiling face of the one and only Park Jimin. 

The very same Jimin who grew up down the street from him in Busan and attended the same high school. Not super close friends but acquainted enough to greet each other in the hallway and pair up for a project would be how Jungkook described their relationship back then. 

However, he would be an idiot to say no to the alpha despite whatever high school acquaintance they did or did not have. 

Jimin, at least back in Busan, was the definition of an upstanding, respectful alpha. His presentation had been the talk of the school with every omega ready to kneel at his feet for a chance to even be considered for a date. He was well-mannered, gentle, and kind - never once known to make an ill-intentioned comment at anyone let alone an omega. 

Jungkook was not surprised to see Jimin being successful enough to provide as a sugar daddy. The alpha was one of the smartest students in their school, acing every exam and getting into SNU on a full scholarship for business. 

Aside from his intelligence, the Parks were also one of the wealthiest families in Busan - owning a successful bakery chain that had multiple locations across Korea and a full online store. 

What had surprised Jungkook was the fact that an attractive, rich, charming twenty-seven-year-old alpha would be lacking potential partners and in search of a sugar baby. Unless Jimin had completely changed into one of those traditional arrogant alphas, Jungkook couldn’t understand how he didn’t have suitors of all subgenders.  

Coming back to his senses, Jungkook quickly returned Jimin’s message - agreeing to meet up as soon as possible. The alpha said he would send a car for him that Friday afternoon and that he was excited to see him again. Jungkook would admit, the response gave him butterflies. 

Friday came too quickly and the omega spent the morning in a frantic spiral deciding what to wear. His options were already limited considering most of his clothes were covered in paint or meant for the gym. Eventually, Jungkook managed to find the nice plaid button-down that he had thrifted with decent jeans and his combat boots, casual but not too casual. 

Jungkook nearly passed out in the street when a black Range Rover pulled up in front of his run-down apartment building, looking comically out of place. A man jumped out and opened the back door him, addressing him as ‘Mr. Jeon’ which was somehow both formal and warm. 

As the car came to a stop in front of a familiar branded coffee shop tucked in a busy Seoul side street, Jungkook felt his jaw drop and eyes widen.

Park Jimin was standing outside a building that he probably had partial ownership of looking at something on his phone, wearing a trim gray three-piece suit with his blonde hair slicked back off his forehead and absolutely radiating powerful alpha energy. 

Not even realizing the driver had exited the car, Jungkook jolted when his door opened and a hand extended to help him out of the backseat. He was seriously hoping that Jimin hadn’t become a money-hungry monster since the last time they saw each other because the alpha was going to be hard to turn down with the way Jungkook’s omega was begging for him. 

That concern was short-lived once Jimin caught sight of him. The alpha pushed his sunglasses up onto his head and tucked his phone away in his pocket before opening his arms for a hug with a beaming smile on his face. “Jungkookie, it’s so nice to see you!” 

Jungkook felt frozen for a moment, overwhelmed by the radiant kindness coming his way along with the velvety bourbon and cedarwood scent that wrapped around him. The alpha’s strong arms embraced him and he naturally tucked his face against Jimin’s shoulder, feeling more relaxed than he had in months. 

“Hi hyung, thank you for meeting me,” Jungkook responded quietly, trying to stop himself from inhaling the alpha’s addictive scent. With the omega’s bergamot and vanilla growing stronger, the area around the pair was beginning to smell like the best perfume in a fragrance store. 

Jimin’s hand tenderly cradled his cheek, his smile softening into a look of concern. “I just had to message you when I saw your profile. The thought of some old, nasty alpha taking advantage of you made my blood boil.” 

As if Jungkook needed another reason to say yes to the alpha, here was Jimin already offering protection and respect for the omega before he even agreed to meet. “I’m really grateful you did. The other messages were, uh, interesting to say the least.”

“I’m sure - some alphas are so shameless. I’m lucky I found you first,” Jimin replied with a smile, offering his arm to direct them inside the coffee shop. 

Jungkook simply returned the smile and hooked his hand around Jimin’s bicep while thinking about how he was certainly the lucky one in this scenario.

The alpha held the door open for him and instructed him to order anything he liked, adding an order of tea sandwiches and a few pastries that he claimed were his favorites after Jungkook only asked for an americano. 

“So, would you like to ask a few questions first or would you like me to start?” Jimin finally asked once they were settled at their table. He moved both plates of food closer to Jungkook which the omega found very heartwarming. 

“Can I…I don’t want this to sound rude, but…” 

Jimin laughed and rested his chin on his hand. “Wondering why I have a profile on Sweet Tooth?”

Jungkook ducked his head slightly, a pink tinge filling his cheeks. “Yeah, I was just surprised to see you on the site.” 

“It’s not rude at all, don’t you worry about that,” Jimin replied lightly, his strong scent hitting Jungkook in comforting waves. “I have more money than I could ever spend on myself and my alpha has been getting pretty pushy about wanting someone to care for. I wouldn’t say I’m lonely because I have great friends, but relationships have always been a rough subject for me.”

“What, how?” Jungkook asked instinctively before bringing his hand to his mouth. He immediately blurted out an apology. “I’m so sorry, now I am being rude. That is just surprising.”

Jimin’s smile didn’t falter in the slightest, seeming endeared by the omega if anything. 

“Please don’t apologize, you are completely right. I just have…I guess it’s just easier to say it outright. I am asexual and it seems that my previous partners drew the line there - money and love be damned. I’m not completely sex-averse, but I am definitely far from sexually active.” 

Jungkook’s face fell into a deep frown, his scent souring and sadness growing. “That’s terrible. I’m sorry you went through that. You should be loved for you and not, you know, your knot.” 

Letting out a wet laugh, Jimin grew emotional at the omega’s response. “Thank you, Jungkookie, that means a lot.” 

“Can I tell you something?” Jungkook asked, suddenly a burst of confidence that he didn’t have before. 

“Of course, I hope that we can always be honest with each other if you decide to pursue this with me,” Jimin responded, hesitating for a moment before extending his hand across the table to offer it for the omega to hold. 

Jungkook gratefully accepted the gesture, squeezing the alpha’s hand to gather strength. 

“I, um, I’ve been kind of terrified at the thought of becoming a sugar baby for someone who only wanted sexual stuff from me. I know I would have done it because I need the money even though the thought literally makes me sick to my stomach. I’ve never figured out if I identify a certain way, but casual sex has always freaked me out.” 

Jimin’s eyes widened as he let out comforting pheromones. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m so glad you didn’t end up in that position. I promise you that it will never happen with me. Consent is the most important thing.” 

In that moment, Jungkook was ready to turn all of his trust over to the alpha. He had no idea how things were finally starting to work out for him, but he was not going to question it. The conversation then shifted to their agreement, both seeming to understand that they were going to move forward with the relationship.

“So, tell me about what’s going on, Jungkookie. How can I help?” Jimin asked, sounding completely genuine and without pity or judgment.

Jungkook was surprised that any lingering embarrassment was gone, the alpha making him feel safe and secure to be open about his situation. 

“I’m having some trouble paying my bills. It’s been a struggle since I got to Seoul, but now that I’ve graduated and I can’t find a job in my field, it’s gotten worse. I’m on the verge of getting evicted and keeping a job as a single omega is harder than I expected.” 

Jimin frowned and regained his hold on Jungkook’s hand to offer comfort. “Did you study art in college? You were always so good when we were kids.” 

The omega blushed, shocked by the alpha’s memory and praise. “Oh, um, yeah, I did. I went to Seoul Arts and my medium was painting. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but it’s been more difficult than I thought.” 

“Seoul Arts! That’s amazing! I’m sure you will have your paintings in a beautiful gallery someday,” Jimin continued with his praise, entirely intentional and not patronizing which Jungkook was used to hearing from his parents. 

“Thank you, hyung. That really would be amazing,” Jungkook replied shyly, appreciating the alpha’s warmth and kindness. “I’ve been out of supplies for a while now though so I might be out of practice.” 

Jimin grimaced, not liking the omega’s dejected tone one bit. “Well, we need to change that then. I’m free for the rest of the afternoon. Why don’t we find a good art supply store and get what you need?” 

Jungkook was dumbfounded, not expecting to jump right into the sugar baby portion of the relationship. He thought they would be talking through terms and possibly agreeing to try it out that day. He looked up owl-eyed at the now-standing alpha who held out a hand for him to take. 

“Are you sure, hyung?” he asked nervously. 

“Jungkook, I was serious when I said I have more money than I could ever spend. I already consider you a friend so please let me help. My alpha is desperate to take care of someone and in my mind, there is no better person than you,” Jimin explained, keeping his hand extended the entire time. 

Taking a deep breath, Jungkook finally nodded and placed his hand in the alpha’s. He stood with a small grin on his face. “Thank you, hyung, you have no idea how grateful I am for this.” 

—

A month later, Jungkook was blown away by how different his life already had become. 

The alpha had paid out the remaining nine months of his lease and covered his utilities far enough that Jungkook may not have to think about them again until he moved out of the dingy little place.

Jimin spared no expense on his art supplies to the point of the omega running out of space in his studio apartment to store the high-quality tools and materials. For the first time in nearly a year, Jungkook was able to spend an entire day painting without feeling guilty for wasting time that could have been spent working. 

And probably the biggest change, his fridge and pantry were fully stocked. Jungkook had casually mentioned that he couldn’t remember the last time he felt full after their first dinner together. 

Jimin was bothered by even the thought of the omega going hungry so he dragged them to the store and made Jungkook fill the cart.

Between paying his bills and keeping him fed, Jungkook was already falling for the alpha, but he was keeping the relationship strictly on their contract terms. Jimin was taking care of him and Jungkook was a gracious and active participant by accompanying him out and spending evenings on the phone together. 

That night, the omega would be visiting Jimin’s penthouse for the first time and they would be discussing more details of their agreement. The alpha mentioned that he had wanted to keep communication open between them and ensure that both remained happy and fulfilled. 

Jungkook knew that Jimin had concerns about their heat and rut cycles and the potential of the omega exploring other relationships. He was going to make sure that the alpha understood Jungkook’s commitment, knowing that he would want to stay loyal to Jimin even if the money was removed from the relationship. 

The omega would remember their conversation from that night forever, hearing the absolutely sweet declaration from the alpha. Jimin laid out exactly what he wanted from their relationship and made it clear that he would continue to support Jungkook with nothing in return aside from his loyalty. 

Jimin admitted that he was protective and already felt connected to Jungkook’s omega, wanting to be his provider in every way. The alpha’s happiness came from the omega’s safety and comfort, knowing that Jungkook is cared for completely by Jimin. 

He wanted to make sure that Jungkook had clothes that he actually wanted to wear, that he had everything he needed to create his art, that he never felt hungry or tired, that he was safe and supported. 

Jungkook dissolved into tears, allowing the alpha to comfort him through the treacherous emotions. He explained to Jimin that he was desperate for those feelings since leaving Busan and he trusted him to pursue the full relationship. 

It only blossomed from there and Jungkook had never been happier. He had quit the latest part-time hellhole that he was serving at, spending his day painting and creating prints for his newly developed online store. 

More nights were spent at Jimin’s than his own apartment, especially after the alpha turned one of his guest rooms into a makeshift art studio. 

Six months into their arrangement, however, Jungkook was hit with two major waves of anxiety.

One was the fact that his heat was going to hit within the next two weeks. The second was the fact that his favorite jeans were getting a little tight - most of his old jeans actually were quite snug around the hips and waist. 

He immediately chalked it up to his heat cycle, bloating being one of his primary pre-heat symptoms, but deep down, Jungkook knew that he definitely put on a bit of weight. 

Most of it was probably needed considering how underweight he was prior to connecting with Jimin, but the alpha certainly kept him well-fed and up until now, Jungkook didn’t pay it a second thought. 

Deciding that his heat was the more prominent concern, Jungkook called Jimin and asked if he could come over that night to talk through it. He typically went to a heat facility to ride through his cycle with basic care and a few toys and figured that he would be doing the same considering the alpha’s preferences, however, Jimin made him a genuinely enticing offer.

The alpha said that if Jungkook were comfortable with it, Jimin would happily allow him to nest in a guest room or his own bedroom. He would make sure that he is comfortable and fed, willing to provide massages and medication for his cramps while also giving him privacy if he needed to use any toys for more painful waves.

Jimin’s lovely proposition sounded like a dream as Jungkook rarely ever had a sexual partner for his heats as it was. Knowing his chosen alpha would be there to care for him and scent him, Jungkook’s omega demanded that they stay at his penthouse for the entire heat and Jungkook did just that. 

It was by far the best heat of Jungkook’s life. Jimin was perfectly attentive, gently rubbing away all his aches and pains while keeping him hydrated and satiated which turned out to be the only downside of the wonderful experience.

Jungkook’s usual bloating and weight gain from his pre-heat typically melted away after his demanding cycle - burning calories one orgasm at a time. However, where the heat facility gave him water and a few protein shakes over those painful days, Jimin ensured he ate full meals and kept his blood sugar up with pieces of chocolate and granola bites. 

Once he was regrettably back at his apartment, Jungkook pulled out the scale to find that his heat cycle tacked on five pounds which brought his total gain up to seventeen pounds since connecting with Jimin. 

The realization sent Jungkook into a reclusive spiral. He decided that he needed to drop some weight as soon as possible to keep Jimin’s interest which meant dieting and working out for the next month or so while coming up with excuses to not see the alpha. 

Jimin was upset and concerned, wanting answers as to why the omega suddenly was declining his invites to spend the night or get dinner after a long workday. Somehow, Jungkook had not considered that the alpha would interpret the distance as a reaction to his heat. 

The plan dissolved three weeks after his decision to hide away for a bit and work off a few pounds. Hearing Jimin’s choked-up voice through the phone, asking if Jungkook had realized that he couldn’t be happy with the alpha’s lack of sexual desire, would haunt the omega’s nightmares. 

Jungkook immediately caught a taxi to Jimin’s house, needing to comfort his alpha. Jimin opened the door and the omega wanted to fall to his knees, begging for forgiveness. 

The alpha looked like a wreck, dressed in dull pajamas with dark circles under his puffy eyes. He seemed like he was bracing himself for heartbreak at the sight of Jungkook in front of him and the omega had to fix what he had done. 

“Alpha, I’m so sorry,” Jungkook whimpered, wrapping himself around Jimin in hopes of providing comfort. “Please forgive me, I shouldn’t have shut you out.” 

Jimin’s arms enveloped Jungkook, the alpha’s strong scent naturally calming him down. “Jungkookie, you don’t need to apologize for your feelings. I knew this was a possibility - it’s happened before.” 

“No!” Jungkook cried out, tightening his grip on the alpha while hating the fact that Jimin was still trying to console him when he hurt the alpha. “My heat was amazing, hyung. You were perfect. I’ve never felt so safe in my entire life.”

The alpha was clearly confused, but he still kept his hold on the omega. Some of the tension softened as he cradled Jungkook’s head against his shoulder. “Then why, sweetheart? What did I do wrong?” 

Jungkook whimpered at the alpha’s still dejected tone. “Nothing, alpha, please believe me. It was me. I got freaked out and I made a stupid decision.” 

“Freaked out about what?” 

The omega sighed and braced himself for the embarrassing confession. “I…um, I realized that I’ve gained some weight.” 

“Okay?” Jimin replied slowly, waiting for more. 

When it didn’t come, the alpha continued, “That’s it? You were going to call this off because, what…you thought I would be upset over you gaining a couple pounds?”

“I mean, it’s more than a couple.” 

“Jungkook,” Jimin said firmly, almost scolding with his tone. 

Jungkook sensed the alpha’s frustration and hearing Jimin question it that way made him think about how ridiculous his plan had been. 

“Honestly, I don’t ever want to call this off. I just…ugh, I can’t believe I actually thought this was a good idea, but I was going to try to lose most of the weight for the next couple weeks so you didn’t lose interest in me and then you know, go back to our normal stuff.” 

Jimin pulled back and cupped Jungkook’s cheeks, looking at him with a mix of exasperation, pain, and endearment. 

“Please never do that to me ever again. I need you to talk to me. The past three weeks were horrible and the idea that you spent it thinking you needed to lose weight for me makes it even worse. Ggukie, you are so beautiful, and how much you weigh will never change that. I…this is not how I planned to do this, but I need to tell you.”

Jungkook braced himself, expecting a speech from Jimin about taking care of himself and stopping his constant overthinking. However, he was shocked by the alpha pulling him in closer to rest his forehead against the omega’s while he spoke from the heart. 

“I love you so much, Jungkook. I was heartbroken at the thought of you leaving me. I’ve barely gotten out of bed this week because I’ve felt terrible without you. I don’t want us to stay together because of money, I want to properly court you and hopefully become your alpha one day.” 

Jungkook whimpered, overcome with various emotions. His omega was torn between celebrating his alpha’s love confession and breaking down in tears at the thought of causing Jimin’s pain. 

“I love you too, Jimin. I hope you can forgive me. Having you as a mate would be the best thing that could ever happen to me.” 

Jimin closed the small gap between them for a lingering kiss, the most intense they had ever shared. There had been gentle pecks in the past as the alpha explained that he was comfortable with kisses as long as the saliva and tongue were limited, but Jungkook felt the emotion behind this one deeper than ever before. 

“Of course, I forgive you. I’m more relieved than anything. I missed you so much, sweetheart.” 

“I missed you too, hyung. My omega was begging me to stop, but I was just so caught up in my head that I let the insecurities get the best of me,” Jungkook replied, trying to make his point clear that Jimin had done absolutely nothing wrong. 

Jimin took a quiet moment to think something over before he said, “How about we go build a nest together? I want to hold you for a little while.” 

Jungkook couldn’t help but smile, the room filling with their shared scents. “That sounds amazing, alpha.” 

—

Their relationship blossomed from that day on. When Jimin said he was going to traditionally court the omega, he meant it. Jungkook had never been so spoiled in all his life. 

The alpha had decided that it was obvious for Jungkook to move in with him once his lease was up - overjoyed to finally get his omega out of his tiny, overpriced apartment. 

Jimin did a full overhaul of the art space his alpha had put together in the penthouse, letting Jungkook select every detail of his studio with a professional interior designer. 

Jimin cleared out an entire side of the master suite’s walk-in closet only to fill it back up with a new wardrobe for the omega. 

Jungkook was grateful for the alpha allowing him to choose his preference on most items because he now had options for fancy date nights but also outfits that could be covered in paint during a day in his studio. 

The only factor of the alpha’s courting that Jungkook was trying to come to terms with was the continued effects on his weight. Jimin had the pantry stocked with every snack the omega had ever mentioned liking and the alpha ensured that Jungkook never missed a meal again. 

Between Jungkook’s already decent appetite and Jimin’s consistent praise whenever he ate well, it was expected for the omega to continue his gain rather than lose it as he planned. 

Sometimes, he was grateful for Jimin’s consistent push to spoil him because it was helpful to have new clothes that fit him better as he filled out more. 

However, the omega would also admit that Jimin was slowly chipping away at his insecurities. 

Not a day went by without the alpha telling him how beautiful he was and how much he loved him. He never shied away from wrapping Jungkook in his tight embrace and holding him close in a warm bath or their shared nest. 

Jimin always offered for Jungkook to accompany him on his morning runs, but it was a gesture of quality time rather than implying he needed the exercise. The alpha never once shamed him for saying no and simply suggested they share a shower when he returned from the solo run.

The alpha helped him find an omega-only yoga class near their building that was welcoming and fun when Jungkook mentioned wanting to find something to help him get out and stay active. 

If Jungkook ever fell into a rough headspace or had a bad day, Jimin would ask what he needed - happy to give him time alone with parting words of love or ready to hold him close until the omega felt ready to leave their nest. 

After a year together, three months into Jimin’s courtship, Jungkook had officially gained twenty-five pounds. His hips and thighs filled out little by little and his cheeks had become more cherubic similar to how they were in his youth. 

The pooch below his belly button, once just slight evidence of his womb, was now a bit plumper - love handles developing on his sides that jutted out from his still trim waist. 

His alpha’s hands were on his body more often than not, gently tracing his curves and praising his beauty. It was harder to question himself when Jimin made him feel so treasured.  

Just when Jungook was coming around to his softer tummy and curvier hips, though, he suffered a mental setback. 

Jimin wanted to take him home to Busan so his parents could meet his future omega and it only seemed right to introduce his alpha to his family as well, even if Jungkook didn’t particularly care what his parents thought of Jimin - they were never going to change his mind.

After meeting his alpha’s parents, it was obvious to Jungkook where Jimin’s kind personality and tender heart came from. 

Jimin’s alpha mother had infused every bit of her protective nature into her son while his omega mother clearly had a close relationship with her son, constantly praising everything the alpha discussed and scenting her son with loving hugs any chance she got. 

Jimin’s omega mother complimented Jungkook throughout their entire stay at the Park residence, telling him how beautiful he was and that he was a perfect match for their son. 

Jungkook always felt appreciated by Jimin’s praise, but something about the words coming from a maternal omega was bolstering his confidence.

While the house was overflowing with compliments in all directions, his future mate’s alpha mother pulled him aside to make sure her son was taking care of him properly. She demanded that Jungkook check in with them regularly and encouraged him to be honest if there was ever something Jimin did that he didn’t like. 

Jungkook truly had never felt so loved and was certain that Jimin’s parents would become his own once their mating was finalized, already treating him as if he was their son. 

They also had the same mindset around feeding him that his alpha held, spending the entire week being stuffed to the brim at their home between the incredible homemade meals and delicious pastries from one of their many bakeries. 

Jimin’s omega mother and a few family friends that Jungkook had been introduced to all indulged in the sweet spread during their trip, encouraging the omega to do the same. He noticed their similar curvy figures and found happiness in fitting with the image of a healthy mate. 

That, unfortunately, was where the happiness of their trip ended. On that Sunday afternoon, the couple made their way from the Park estate to the Jeon’s home and received a completely different welcome. 

Jungkook’s alpha father wanted to discuss money from the jump yet seemed annoyed by his future son-in-law’s successful career at the same time, almost envious of the young alpha. 

His omega mother, on the other hand, held strong on her judgmental treatment of Jungkook while making uncomfortable, almost flirtatious comments toward Jimin. 

While Jimin spoke to his father in the living room, Jungkook’s mother cornered him in the kitchen and started her typical barrage on the omega’s life choices and appearance within hours of their arriving. 

“So, how is the whole art thing treating you?” she asked snarkily, always hoping that her son would admit his failure in his career choice just to gloat about being right. 

Jungkook was not deterred by her implication and genuinely smiled. 

“It’s going really well. Jimin helped me build a nice studio at home and I have an online store where I’ve been selling my paintings and prints. My sales have been going up lately so I’ve been thinking of outsourcing the printing to keep up with my orders.” 

“Hmm, well isn’t that nice, dear? Glad to see it wasn’t a waste of our money after all,” his mother responded, sounding disinterested as she decided what to go after next. Not bothering to even spare a glance at her son. 

Jungkook fought the urge to roll his eyes, knowing fully well that they hadn’t contributed a dime to his education as he earned a full scholarship to Seoul Arts. He knew more was coming so he put his focus into brewing his and Jimin’s tea while hoping that the alphas came in soon. 

A minute of silence passed and Jungkook honestly thought he was about to get off easy when he felt a sharp pinch to the soft skin above his hip. He flinched and stepped away, snapping his head toward his mother who had a disapproving smirk on her face. 

“Someone’s getting a bit fat.” 

Her voice was even sharper than her pinch, looking almost pleased that she found something to latch onto. Before Jungkook could even figure out what to say, she powered on. 

“You know, just because this alpha is courting you doesn’t mean you can just let yourself go. He’s young, rich, and handsome - he could trade you in tomorrow and here you are packing on the pounds as if you have something to offer him besides your looks.” 

A furious growl reverberated through the house as Jimin entered the kitchen looking as though he was barely containing his alpha below the surface. Jungkook had never seen true anger on his alpha’s face before and was shocked to hear the absolutely feral sound from deep within Jimin’s chest. 

The shocking sound was the only reason Jungkook hadn’t dissolved into tears from his mother’s slicing comments. 

Comforting bourbon and cedarwood filled Jungkook’s senses, suddenly found his alpha’s strong body physically shielding him from his mother. 

The omega placed a gentle hand on Jimin’s lower back, hoping to provide a returned feeling of security to keep the alpha from tearing his mother apart, although it was deserved. 

“How dare you speak to my mate that way; he is your child, you nasty woman,” Jimin spat out, his voice deeper than Jungkook had ever heard it. “And you couldn’t be more wrong. His beauty is an added bonus to his heart and soul. Jungkook is the only omega for me; he is everything.”

Jungkook instinctively gripped the alpha’s shirt tighter as tried to pump his own calming pheromones into the room while fighting off much different tears than before. 

If anything, he was ready to offer his neck for a mating bite to Jimin who jumped to defend him without question - loudly proclaiming his love for his omega. 

It seemed as though his mother realized not to push Jimin who looked like one more word would send him over the edge. His chest was heaving with panting breaths, only grounded by his omega’s touch and warm scent. 

Making a sudden decision, Jimin spun around and every trace of disgust dropped from his face as he cupped Jungkook’s cheeks with a tender touch. 

“Why don’t we grab our bags and head home, sweetheart? I’m not going to let them treat you this way.” 

Jungkook finally let a few tears fall as he nodded in agreement, overwhelmed with the pure love and care radiating from his alpha. The subtle motion was all Jimin needed to take his hand and lead them to the guest room where they had dropped their bags, trying to block out the hushed whispers between Jungkook’s parents in the kitchen - most likely his father scolding his mother for burning their bridge, not with their son but with his future alpha’s bank account. 

The moment they stepped inside the quiet bedroom, Jimin had his arms around Jungkook in a soothing yet tight embrace. He dropped kiss after kiss onto the omega’s neck and jaw before finally whispering, “I meant every word I said, you are everything to me, Jungkook - everything.” 

“I love you so much, Jimin,” Jungkook replied softly, his face securely tucked into the alpha’s neck to surround himself with his comforting scent. 

“Let’s go home, my love.” 

—

His mother’s cutting words consumed him for the following weeks no matter how many compliments were rained on him by Jimin. 

Every pass by the mirror and each rumble of hunger had the moment on replay in his mind. 

Jungkook could physically feel the hard squeeze of her fingernails against his skin while the insults sat heavily on his chest. 

“Someone’s getting a bit fat.” 

“Let yourself go.”

“Packing on the pounds.”

Jungkook knew that Jimin was worried about him, but the omega just couldn’t shake the insecurity that was plaguing him every day. 

His art started to reflect his downtrodden mood and his clothing started to drown his frame, choosing oversized hoodies and baggy t-shirts even during the night. He started to lose weight, not in a healthy way but in response to the burden of his emotions. 

Jungkook became nauseous at the thought of eating once his mother’s words started spinning around in his head, often taking small bites to appease Jimin who looked afraid that the omega was going to fall apart at any moment which was partially true. 

Jungkook knew he was masking the real pain from the rocky relationship with his mother by fixating on her discussion about his weight. There were far more moments that hurt him as the memories flooded his mind each time he thought about their conversation. 

She always had an obsession with having the perfect appearance. Jungkook always needed to be perfect for her and in his childhood, he had been convinced that he would never achieve that. There was something to fix or change or do that had to be better for her and no matter what he did, it was never right.

His emotions had always been her plaything - something to attack so she would feel better about herself and it seemed that Jungkook and his omega were finally taking time to recognize that. 

Jimin knew Jungkook was strong and believed that his mate needed time to process the turmoil the omega’s mother had opened up about during their visit, but as more time passed, Jimin felt worse and worse. 

He also became aware that Jungkook’s weight was no longer at the core of the issue, possibly never having been the true concern. 

Jimin’s love and praise were enough to fight off the little moments of insecurity that popped up before their Busan visit, but the alpha couldn’t seem to touch this profound burden.

This was a deeply emotional matter that clearly stretched back to Jungkook’s childhood considering that the omega warned Jimin to expect snide comments and direct judgment from his mother. 

The alpha was desperate to help his future mate heal the hurt his own mother had caused so Jimin finally did the only thing he could think would help. He called his parents, wanting guidance and support - absolutely the right decision as both his mothers were in Seoul by the next morning. 

Jimin and his alpha mother had both taken off work, leaving the family business in the hands of trusted colleagues until further notice. 

His mothers told him that they had no intention of leaving Seoul until both of their children were happy and healthy, instantly accepting Jungkook as a full member of the family even without their official mating.

Allowing Jungkook a late morning, Jimin left their nest to welcome his parents and receive some of their comfort for himself. 

His alpha mother immediately moved to the kitchen after greeting him so she could start preparing breakfast while Jimin’s omega mother simply held her son in a tight embrace, scenting him softly and whispering promises that everything would work out fine. 

With both of them working on morning preparations, Jimin crawled back into their bed to rouse his mate. He trailed a gentle hand across Jungkook’s back and placed tender kisses across the omega’s shoulders. 

A little whine made Jimin smile, listening to the other maneuver through his half-asleep state. Jungkook eventually rolled over, his eyes growing in confused surprise to see his alpha hovering above him. 

“Hyung? Why are you still home? Are you sick?” Jungkook asked groggily, looking over at the clock on the nightstand twice to confirm that it was well past Jimin’s typical departure for the office. 

Jimin, knowing that it was a bold decision, snuck one hand under Jungkook’s shirt and placed it flat against his omega’s soft tummy. Trying his best to ignore the tense reaction, the alpha laid a sweet kiss on Jungkook’s lips and started a soothing motion with his fingers. 

“I took the day off. My parents decided to come up for a visit; they are in the kitchen making breakfast right now actually,” Jimin responded, keeping his tone light and casual. 

Jungkook stared at the alpha in shock, unmoving and only growing tenser. Jimin was waiting for some sort of anxious reaction as he continued his caress of the omega’s midsection. 

Suddenly, the omega’s scent sweetened a bit and his body relaxed back into the bed. Jungkook actually gave Jimin a soft smile which nearly brought the alpha to tears. 

“Thank you,” Jungkook whispered, sniffling quietly as he brought his arms around Jimin to pull him closer. 

Within moments of Jimin’s explanation, he realized that his alpha had called in support for them - something he had never been granted before.

Jimin wrapped one hand around his back while the other cradled Jungkook’s neck, his thumb running gently over the space where his mating mark would proudly sit one day. He placed his lips on Jungkook’s forehead and held them there for a bit. 

Eventually, Jimin responded, “All I want is for you to be happy, sweetheart. For you to know how much you are loved.” 

Jungkook let a few tears fall, knowing his alpha would catch them. He let himself drown in Jimin’s comforting scent while riding through the various emotions. 

Of all his wonderful memories with Jimin, that one would remain near the top for most profound because it was such a simple moment that changed the course of his life. 

Looking back, Jungkook realized that was the moment he allowed himself to start grieving the last little frays of the relationship with his mother. This was the point he saw Jimin’s parents fully as his own and accepted that family was chosen - the Parks being his choice every time. 

Jimin gently eased him out of bed, encouraging him to do his full morning routine and reset himself in a way after ignoring all elements of self-care for nearly a month. His alpha graciously gave him time to process alone with the excuse of going to help his mothers in the kitchen. 

Feeling clean and rejuvenated, Jungkook truly looked at himself in the mirror for the first time since returning from Busan two months ago. He felt that familiar disappointment as he lifted his shirt, however, for a much different reason this time. 

The omega clearly lost weight and Jungkook assumed that would bring a smile to his face after wanting it for months. Yet, he realized that his body looked and felt completely wrong in his reflection. 

With that added weight, Jungkook had a warm glow to his skin and an enticing curve to his waist and hips. There was now a dullness to his pale skin, almost sickly, and his body lacked any sort of shape. 

All of Jimin’s comments and praises came flooding back and Jungkook finally realized how right his alpha had been after losing the figure he once despised. Every mention of his body being beautiful and healthy had been completely true and Jungkook wanted it back. 

Pulling on one of Jimin’s sweaters and finding his slippers, Jungkook left the bedroom and made his way to the kitchen which held delicious smells and quiet voices. 

Before he could even cross the kitchen threshold, Jungkook found himself in Jimin’s omega mother’s arms. She scented him without question and rocked them gently side-to-side, petting his hair and radiating calm, loving energy. 

“Hello darling, it’s so good to see you. We missed you,” she whispered into his ear, keeping her embrace around him. 

“I missed you too, Mrs. Park,” Jungkook replied, feeling grateful for his warm, motherly love. 

She leaned back and brought one hand to his cheek, shaking her head. “Mrs. Park? Don’t be silly, call me Eomma, dear.” 

Jungkook froze, overcome with emotions. He never had an ‘Eomma’ before, always being told to call his parents mother and father. 

On top of the already overwhelming moment, Jungkook let the word ‘dear’ run through his head - never heard it used so sweetly and genuinely in his direction before. His mother always called him dear, but it almost felt derogatory with the way she used it. 

Gentle fingers wiped away his tears, bringing Jungkooks focus back to his alpha’s mother in front of him. He simply nodded, letting out a wet laugh, and repeated, “Eomma.” 

Jungkook heard Jimin sniffle, sounding just as affected by the adorable scene while Jimin’s alpha mother walked over and placed her hand on his back. 

“Alright, let me get in on this,” she said, making the others chuckle. She pulled Jungkook into her arms, holding him similarly to how her mate had just hugged him. “You better not try Mrs. Park on me; I only respond to Mom, got it?”

Another laugh drew from Jungkook’s chest, happy tears still running down his cheeks in tandem. He nodded again, returning the alpha’s fierce embrace. “Got it, Mom.” 

She pulled back with a warm smile and tapped him under the chin affectionately. “We love you and we feel so grateful to have another son, especially one who loves our Jimin. Please don’t ever forget that.” 

Jungkook couldn’t stop the tears after that, hunching over slightly into her shoulder as his chest heaved with emotion. 

His alpha’s scent suddenly wrapped around him and Jungkook felt himself being transferred into Jimin’s strong arms. He pulled the alpha closer, putting his nose directly into Jimin’s neck and fully releasing cathartic sobs in response to the outpouring of pure love from Jimin and his parents. 

They eventually helped him calm down and the four of them enjoyed a filling breakfast on their balcony. Jimin sat with one hand on Jungkook’s thigh the entire time, feeding him occasional bites when the omega got caught up in conversation with his mothers.

It was easily the most he had eaten in weeks and it was the most Jimin had seen him smile since they left Busan. The alpha finally felt like there was a light back in Jungkook’s eyes, everyone healing little by little from the unfortunate experience. 

Jimin’s parents stayed for the next week - cooking meals, offering hugs, and supporting both Jimin and Jungkook through whatever emotions may have come. 

The four searched together for a good omega therapist in Seoul, Jungkook feeling like it was something he could handle with his family as a pillar of strength. 

It took time for him to process the interaction in Busan, let alone his childhood, but Jimin never once let him go through it alone. Whatever he needed, Jungkook had it without question.

Over time, Jungkook started to learn that the perfection his mother was insistent on creating didn’t exist. If was never about that at all, it was simply her causing him pain. He had come to realize that it may never happen and the omega set out to just enjoy his life.

—

Two years later, there had been many changes. 

The couple was officially mates, having a beautiful ceremony in Busan. Jungkook had filled out once again, gaining back what he had lost and a little more as Jimin’s pampering never ceased after their courtship ended. 

Jimin had fully taken on the top leadership role of the family company; his alpha mother decided to retire and travel with her mate. Jungkook’s art store had gone a bit viral from a series he did on healing his inner child, leading him to open a physical storefront where he sold his prints and originals. 

The biggest change by far was the one currently in progress. Children had been a big discussion for them - Jungkook needed to heal himself before even considering being a parent while Jimin had always feared the discussion with his future mate.

After a difficult discussion, Jungkook ensured Jimin that he would never force his alpha to do something that would make him uncomfortable. The alpha promised he would put whatever money they needed into making a family and they found a welcome solution.

Jungkook admitted that he would obviously love any child they adopted, but a small part of him truly wanted to experience pregnancy - a purely omegan desire. 

Jimin told him he understood, his own alpha wanting to provide a child for his mate even though both he and his wolf were completely put off by full intercourse.

With the help of Jimin’s parents, they found a professional in Seoul who did full extraction-based in vitro fertilization - meaning Jimin would not have to endure anything that was sexual in nature and it was completely safe for Jungkook to experience. 

Their first round was successful and Jungkook was pregnant a year later. And the omega was absolutely cherished. 

Jimin’s parents, somehow, spoiled him even more than his alpha. Constantly visiting with food and gifts for both him and their baby. 

His omega mother praised Jungkoook for how well he was carrying and how beautiful he was. Even Jungkook would admit that his pregnancy glow was pretty incredible.

The weight gain, of course, continued throughout his pregnancy, but now, Jungkook took it in stride. Loving his body and feeling confident in the changes, especially with how much his alpha loved on him.

The birth went smoothly for him and the mates were home with their daughter. Jungkook was grateful every day for Jimin but even more so with the alpha’s care for him and their pup like right now.

Jungkook was in his nest, relaxing after Minji’s bedtime feeding. He watched as Jimin paced back and forth across their bedroom with her cradled to his chest, lulling her to sleep. 

Unable to keep it to himself as the feeling warmed his heart, Jungkook said, “I love you.” 

The alpha halted mid-step, turning to look at his omega with a soft smile on his face - almost looking a little emotional from the words he had heard so many times before. 

“I cannot put into words how much I love you, Jungkook.”

Jimin brought Minji to the little bassinet on the omega’s side of the bed, laying her down and ensuring she stayed asleep before crawling into the nest and joining his mate.

As the alpha’s hand moved over the omega’s soft middle, pregnancy still completely evident as his rounded belly healed, Jungkook was struck by how incredible he felt. He thought back to all those moments when he cringed from his alpha’s touch and almost completely ran from him over the state of his body. 

Now, the insecurities were tucked away in the back of his mind, nearly non-existent. They were there to remind him of how beautiful his relationship was and the way Jimin loved him. 

Jungkook was actually quite proud of his body now, especially after having brought life into the world. He had built himself a new family and found happiness in his life which he never expected to have in the past. 

The feeling of Jimin’s lips on his jaw and his alpha’s gentle caress of his belly brought him out of his thought, smiling up at his mate with a loving gaze. 

“How are you doing? Any pain? Are you comfortable?” Jimin asked in a hushed whisper, just as he had done multiple times a day since their daughter was born. 

Jungkook pulled him closer for a full, lingering kiss. He looked into Jimin’s eyes for a quiet moment, trying to convey his immense amount of love for him. 

“I’m perfect, alpha, absolutely perfect.”

#bts weight gain #chubby bts #bts abo #bts mpreg #alpha jimin #omega jungkook #chubby jungkook #supportive jimin #asexual jimin #soft bellied tannies

[legitimatesatanspawn]

What if Beren and Luthien were genderbent?

Ooh, that's an interesting question.

Now, forewarning: this is just a bunch of theories and personal thoughts on the matter so don't take this as canon. It is rooted in what we do know of the families involved and a bit in how social structures work in the setting, but in this case it is completely me talking out of hand about this.

Names. This is a big thing to me because I love names and this will help me keep the idea separate from canon. Luthien is Quenyan for "flower-daughter" so let's go with one of the Quenyan suffixes for males… Luthion sounds good if a bit too on the nose. Another option for flower are Lot/Loth from Ninquelótë, Númellótë, and Vingilot. So Lótëmon? Now Beren was named after his maternal grandfather, but since I don't know his grandmother's name we'll go up the tree for his great-grandmother Adanel. I'm guessing his mother Emeldir got naming rights to go with Beren instead of him getting named after Bregor. Admittedly Lotemon and Adanel might not roll off as easily as Luthien and Beren but they work for this post.

Brief Discussion of Upbringing: Beren and Luthien Beren, or Adanel now as this will be easier. While Artanis (or Galadriel as we know her) is the biggest Noldorian female who stands out in my memory with the next one being Nerdanel who was the wife of Feanor who deserves her own loredump post, the laws of succession in Numenor which in turn are basically spread to the civilizations of Man to varying degrees in the known lands of Middle Earth are cribbed off of those of the Noldor. Which is why I'm bringing two Noldor elves up here. Basically titles go paternally to the nearest male descendant although in the case of a female eldest child she still receives family heirlooms as her birthright. (Doesn't make up for it but whatever.) Although I do remember there being a case where there were several older daughters onto whom one of the Numenorian kings tried to pass the title to but their grandmother spooked them like some grammas tend to do, so they refused and the title went to their younger brother. Now here's the fun bit: Beren's mother (much like Luthien's Melian) Emeldir is a BAMF. Her name and her title both basically were "the man-hearted woman". So Emeldir without doubt kicked ass, lived to at least 50 going by the events surrounding Dagor Bragollach (the Battle of Sudden Flame), and I like to think she raised Beren to understand important stuff like consent and a refusal being just that. So while I think that "Adanel" would be treated just as Beren would, she wouldn't get exactly the same equal treatment. But given her mother, her father would likely try anyway. So Beren's life as a woman would be largely unchanged. Luthien, or as she'll be here "Lótëmon", is still the only child of Thingol and Melian. Still half-maia, still likely beautiful and fairer beyond everything. Still probably has a thing for tall, broad shouldered, and golden-brown half-feral people spotted in the forest. Maybe a little more leeway when it comes to things and hopefully not kidnapped (which would mean no Huan) but considering he'll still be Beautiful and how beauty is often coveted in the setting… I suspect that "Lotemon" will also live largely the same life.

Quest and Future Rather than demanding the Silmaril as the brideprice, perhaps it is instead just a proof of strength or resoluteness or something. Again, Thingol would've probably thought Beren/"Adanel" would actually be able to do it but the sheer balls to go through with it and return with that damn bold claim of it being indeed still in hand when they return… The knockoff effects for the future will be different though. Luthien and Beren's story was fairly unusual and set the stage for an elf choosing a mortal, and a mortal pursing something dangerous in the name of love. A man may be viewed as brave in some societies/civilizations by their fellow men while a woman instead deemed foolish for the same actions which is disgusting but there it is. A woman using beauty to bewitch her enemies would be 'sexy' while a man doing the same would be different and perhaps seen as underhanded. Although it would be one of the goodside counterparts to Sauron's wiles and paint the idea that cleverness such as that is not always in service of selfish cruelty. It's possible that instead of singing of Luthien's beauty they'd be singing of "Lotemon" and his cunning. There's also some slightly different implications of the mortal woman dying and waiting for her love who when he joins her has to fight for the right for them to stay together in death or in life. This also means that Thingol taking in Turin would have a few more connotations of replacing his lost son instead of caring for a second child who is different from his daughter. So maybe Turin would be even more eager to run out to fight since he doesn't want to be seen as a pale shadow to "Lotemon".

TLDR Different names, slightly different upbringings, somewhat different after effects, but since the Song is a thing and the Silmarils are still a big big thing with the characters then the story would likely stay largely the same.

#lore dump #lore post #the silmarillion #tolkien #beren and luthien #beren #beren erchamion #luthien tinuviel #thingol #overthinking again #melian #genderbend #gender bias #turin #turin turambar #why do i overthink things #overthinking #i could had just said i think they'd be the same #but noooooo #i thought i posted this #hope you see this anon

[thaliajoy-blog]

Chapter 1 "Three Green Queens and the Dragon Anarchy" project

What a grim feast it was. The gold and black banners played a gloomy game with the torches. Alicent stood to the right side of the young bride, at arm's length of her grand-daughter.

Jaehaera was unnervingly calm - too much of the drug she'd been given to keep her steady and hopefully, mindlessly smiling, had made her as silent as a graveyard, and her face did not shine at any moment during the dressing, the parade, the ceremony or the party afterwards. She is only eight years old, and this whole thing should only be a formality, and an occasion for her to be the center of everyone's attention and affection. In fact, Alicent thought, she is now bound to be at the center of all our attentions for the rest of her life. She's the Queen. A queen of her own, by blood and not by marriage. The banners around them belonged to her late father, King Aegon II. A three-headed golden dragon on a black background. For the late king's beautiful dragon. But that dragon was dead now. Sunfyre had come crashing down from the sky after his fight with Baela Targaryen's own Moondancer. The poor thing had agonized for days. They would have to change those banners, at some point. They belonged to the grave, like all her sons now.

In any case, Alicent had informally forbidden black from being worn by anyone on this day of celebration and triumph. A discordant decision, given that the atmosphere of mourning was ominous. But no one dared go against the demand. They all knew why. In the same spirit, few dared to wear red. Alicent herself wore a dress of the deepest green - in stark contrast with Jaehaera, dressed in a soft and light springtime green.

Red and black stood for the imprisoned queen. Rhaenyra Targaryen still lived. Under heavy guard, in a place where she was hated and would find no friend ; the city of Oldtown. Or so her cousin said. Alicent would not draw one breath without some fear getting into her lungs and chocking her. At Jaehaera's left, Aegon the Younger sulked. Dressed in green too, like most people attending to some degree, he bore a grey dragon and a flaming tower on his breast. Alicent thought a moment about Jaehaera's new sigil ; maybe a dragon coiled around the Hightower. They might as well show for all to see who truly ruled. Behind this gloomy young queen, the power of Oldtown, the power of the Hightowers, the Green power. Alicent ruled. Jaehaera would not be of age until she was fifteen - and given her present state, she might forever need a regent, albeit an unofficial one. Alicent still had at least seven years of power ahead of her. If things went according to plan. Around them, men looked with deep eyes. Unwin Peake, a noted loyalist, could almost be heard plotting his future moves. This one would push his mother out of a window for a taste of power. He wants something. They all do, or they are stupid, and almost useless. Lord Roland Westerling was there, on behalf of his daughter Johanna, and not far from him, Lord Royce Caron represented his daughter Elenda, the lady regent of Storm's End. The later should have been there for a different wedding : that of Aegon the Elder and lady Cassandra Baratheon. The lady was there too, smiling (as she was surely bid), with two of her sisters. More people to content ; she needed their strength, however displeasing it was for a Queen, to be in the debt of subjects.

Aegon the Younger, obviously was a source of trouble too. He was a child, nearly eleven, but he was Rhaenyra Targaryen's last living child. Aegon II had officially booted Rhaenyra from the succession, and her son as well, but ironically, his own ascension showed how laws and decrees could mean very little in the face of ambition and determination. If enough people wanted this Aegon to be king, the war would continue. The child sometimes looked at her straight and clear ; he was old enough not to make a scene, but his chilly stares showed how little he controlled his emotions. He barely looked at Jaehaera - and when his eyes fell on her, they went through her, as though she were a ghost ; as though she weren't there. No doubt in his mind, the only queen in Westeros was his mother. Alicent shot him back a chilly smile. He understands me, she thought, seeing him flinch a little, and lower his eyes.

The feast was nearly at an end. It had gotten a little bit merrier, and Alicent remembered sweet summer evenings with her sons and her daughter, where laughter felt, through the passage of time, like beautiful songs. She could not remember one thing that was said then ; her memory refused her that comfort. But she let no sadness transpire on her face. I'm the Queen, she thought. They all realize it. Not a sad thing forgotten in a tower, a tottering grandmother who counted her losses and smiled upon her new-born grandchildren - I am the real center of this room. Rhaenyra is not here. Nor are her brothers. It is just me, Jaehaera, and this sulky boy, Aegon. There were two others, really, but neither could or would attend. Helaena slept or raved in her chambers, too deep in grief. And the other...the royal little lady, Baela Targaryen, who had put her son under for a second time, and left to her the ruling of the kingdom. Baela could not be trusted anywhere near knives, or anywhere near Alicent. She hated her with a fiery passion, and Alicent only gave her a cool dislike in return. She now slept in a cell, and no doubt screamed as much as Helaena did. For now, she was a nuisance more than anything. But holding her had its advantages.

High in the snowy Vale, Alicent's true ennemy stood. Hard to believe - but the Targaryen who threatened her the most, because of her freedom, her youth, and her brand-new dragon, was Rhaena of Pentos. The girl who was said to be sweet and ladylike, prone to obedience. Had Rhaenyra been like her ! Would it have made her stronger, or more vulnerable, that armor of courtesy and maidenhood ?

But Rhaena is a daughter of Daemon Targaryen, no one should forget it. And of Laena Velaryon...could the little thing high in the Vale be scolded or coddled into being crowned queen ? If she chose to go all the way, she could claim the throne by putting forward the claim of her grandmother and mother. The Vale was ruled by a woman, after all...why not ? How grotesque this situation would be. Having Baela to hold against her was a good thing. And in a way, Aegon, even if he was now her grand son-in-law.

When it was time, Jaehaera and Aegon were made to get up. They have to sleep in the same bed, even if of course, nothing will come of it at this point. It was purely symbolic, but Alicent cared about it. Jaehaera then came to her, her eyes darkened, dull and sharp at the same time, somehow.

"Lady grandmother, can I visit mother before I go to bed ? I will not speak loudly, I will not touch her, if she doesn't want it. I want to see her for a minute, that's all."

Did Alicent receive Helaena on her wedding night, before she went to Aegon's bed ? She would almost let the mask slip, there. She put her spindly hands on her little queen's face. They had both grown frail. Alicent was long and thin now. She was like a great squeleton - the war has weakened her, like a malignant tumor. And the little girl seems smaller than ever, so slow to grow, her cheeks so pale.

"My Queen, that would not be wise. Your mother is very ill. More ill than usual ; you may be distressed at seeing her in her present state. You should rest - I see you are tired."

"I'm not tired," Jaehaera responded.

It's true ; she was a dragon too. It was difficult to sway her father, and his brother Aemond. Maybe she will be difficult too, after all. And Helaena had always been peasant and pliable, but what she had suffered had turned her into a sad, unruly creature.

She would have to deal will that.

Everything is so fragile, little granddaughter. You are a queen, and yet, you have to learn to obey for now. She imagined it ; the great black dragon Jaehaera would one day ride and command, flying over the Hightower. The two most powerful houses in the realm, united. And an eight years old with a mad mother and the ghost of a dead twin is the hope of that project. Jaehaera went away, and did not turn her eyes to her.

#asoiaf fanfic #asoiaf fanarts #three green queens #dragon anarchy #alicent hightower pov #alicent hightower #jaehaera targaryen #aegon the younger #helaena targaryen #rhaena targaryen #baela targaryen #unwin peake #cassandra baratheon #roland westerling #royce caron

[astroismypassion]

i’ve been feeling really called to continue gaining my knowledge surrounding astrology and hopefully, eventually start doing my own readings down the line. i was just wondering how you started to find yourself becoming really immersed in the understanding of astrology and if you have any tips for someone who feels called to do the same?

(thank you, your work is very inspiring)

Hello,

thank you so so much, this was such a sweet message from you.

I was listening to every astrology channel on Youtube for 2 years before I even started to understand and could interpret a full (natal) chart. For the longest time, like a year I was then interpreting just particular placement. Then I also started looking into a full natal chart. And for another year, all I could do is just natal chart interpretations. I couldn't even understand synastry or composite chart yet. Not to mention persona charts. I read book on astrology in the library, online pdfs and resources. I also regularly talked to an acquintances to attended school of astrology and he gave me this awesome handbook on astrology as well that was written by his astrology teacher. I read through every astrology post here on Tumblr as well, I came across so so many cool blogs that I loved and I just read about aspect, placements, signs, their answers to questions. Another good thing is every astrology forum on the internet as well, these I must say are really hard core astrologers, I learnt so much about aspects from them, but also synastry and composite. When I started to listen to Indian astrologers and Vedic astrology on youtube and via websites/online I knew I was in it deep haha since being from Europe up to that point I mostly followed just Western astrology.

Currently I must say I crave to read something more stimulating. I kind of feel like I plateaued. I know general definitions and meaning in astrology just a bit too much, that it's sometimes harder to find something I haven't at least heard before. I keep looking in actual physical books now rather then online, since online it can get repetitive. But one area I still feel like I need to learn more online is degree theory and just overall on degrees. I wish to know more about degrees.

I always recommend doing astrology, especially if you have pointers to that in your natal/Midheaven Persona chart. Like I've interpreted many charts where I noticed the person has Uranus in the 2nd, Aquarius over the 3rd house, Scorpio over the 11th house, Aquarius over the 7th house, Pisces Moon, Neptune in the 4th house, Pisces IC, Aquarius IC etc. and I always suggest going into astrology more seriously. Because some of these aspects are really good, like not just a regular person that has a slight interest in astrology, but someone who would really grasp the concept very easy.

I wish you a lot of success in this field. I must say I'm still passionate about it even after years now and I think this is the only thing that makes my blog look inspiring. That I have the same passion as I had on day one.

@astroismypassion

#astrology #astro note #astroblr #astro community #astro notes #astro community on tumblr #astrology on tumblr #astroismypassion #astroismypassion blog #chart reading #astrology blog #natal chart #astro observations

[rainbowsky]

Hallo Rainbow, thank you for your blog, it´s so interesting, entertaining and informative!Since DD has now become shareholder of YH, I´m wondering if that reduces the chances him of ever coming out or get at least bolder to share the same stage again? Like now he will feel even more responsible not only for co workers on a project but for a whole business company. Of course I´m happy for him and his massive success which really is beyond imagination but my turtle heart feels a bit torn...

Hi Didiber! Thanks so much, I'm glad you're enjoying my blog! 😊

A couple things come to mind when I read this...

Fake, fan fiction, CPN.

My thoughts regarding DD and YH.

My thoughts regarding fan reactions to career and life decisions GG and DD make.

I'll start with #1. I don't think the pressure level has changed for DD. He's been carrying a lot of responsibility at Yuehua for years as the top earner there. Just because the company is now listed on the stock exchange, that's not going to really make that big of a difference to DD's activities.

The real pressure will come upon those who are in charge at Yuehua, and especially on those in charge of finding new talent that can match some of DD's earning capability.

It's been said that DD will be helping with the new talent to some degree, but ultimately it's not his burden to bear, it's the company's. Yuehua has stated they intend to use most of the capital they raised through this IPO to work on finding and developing new talent, so hopefully they'll have some success with that.

As for DD coming out, being seen on the same stage as GG, etc., the likelihood of those things happening hasn't changed at all. As I've said many times, any top star represents the work product of dozens of people. Their fortunes are deeply tied to the fortunes of the employees, brands, drama projects, management teams, etc. etc. etc. they work with. They aren't at liberty to make choices 'just for them', they have to consider all the other people and entities that will be impacted.

And that's not just on a personal level, that's on a business/legal level as well. In many cases there will be liability if they do something seriously damaging to their own image (and by extension, the image of the brand/project/entity affected). Just watch what happens when a star is canceled in China. They end up being held liable for lost revenue of some of the projects they've been a part of. That's actually government policy now - to hold stars directly accountable for the impact of their 'bad behavior'.

Is being queer 'bad behavior' that could be punished in this way? Well, the government has definitely been tightening the noose on the LGBTQ community in recent years, so it's possible, especially if GGDD's coming out became a political issue in China, or sparked a political movement of any kind - which it might - or if it was deemed to be 'a bad influence on the youth' - which it probably would, given the homophobia of this government and their emphasis on pressuring people to enter straight marriages and have children.

Even without government policy being a factor, most major entertainment contracts include clauses about this type of thing. Not just management contracts but also project contracts, brand endorsement contracts, etc. etc.

All of these factors are at play regardless of whether Yuehua is listed on the stock exchange or not. It doesn't really change a thing.

As for #2...

Disclaimer: Every fan is free to make their own choices about how to be a fan. I talk about my own feelings and perspectives but ultimately they're just my opinions. I feel strongly that everyone needs to think for themselves and form their own ideas.

I feel dismay whenever I see turtles - or really any fan - get upset about the career moves or decisions GG and DD make. In my view GG and DD should always do what's best for them and their lives and careers. Full stop.

And they are the only people qualified to make those decisions. Fans have no actual clue, and in almost all cases they don't have even passing experience/knowledge in one of the areas affecting these choices, let alone all of the complex factors that go into a choice at the level GG and DD are operating on.

GG and DD are surrounded by entire teams of experts whose only job is to consult with them and give them the best possible information on all the angles and factors that go into any decision. Legal experts, management teams, financial advisors no doubt, professional insiders, close family and friends, etc. etc. People who know the details of GG and DD's situations and goals and are uniquely qualified personally or professionally to support them in choosing what's best for them.

Any decision GG and DD make reflects what they feel is their best option given all the factors at play.

Therefore as a fan I personally choose to respect and support whatever direction GG and DD choose to go in. It's not my business to decide what's best for GG and DD, nor do I generally allow myself to view their choices through the lens of my own personal wishes or cravings. They don't owe me anything.

Especially when it comes to their personal lives, because I think it's extremely important for turtles to remember that GG and DD's relationship and their choices about whether to be out as queer are part of their personal lives. It's not work product, nor anything we have any reasonable stake in as fans.

I can wish GG would record a full album and do more live singing performances (and I do), but the fact that he hasn't done so tells me that it's not an option for him given the factors currently at play in his career. So I accept and respect that I will have to wait on that, and that it might never happen.

And as turtles we might fantasize about them being able to live openly and freely one day, about them coming out and getting married or whatever turtles daydream about, but ultimately those are very personal decisions that only they can make. If something in their career seems to lead further away from that ever happening we should remember that those are fantasies anyway, and in no way reflect GG and DD's reality.

All this to say, I hope we can all just celebrate and support GG and DD's careers. What they choose to do, what they choose to show us and where they are at right now rather than what we personally want to see happen.

I believe in GG and DD, and in their ability to know what's best for them.

I want what's best for them.

The equation couldn't possibly be simpler.

I leave it all in their capable hands.

To be clear: I'm not trying to paint anyone who laments certain impossibilities as selfish jerks. What I'm trying to do is to encourage us all to look at things from a different angle - one that will hopefully make us all happier, calmer and more stable as fans, and will make it easier for us to support and accept GG and DD's choices.

#ggdd uncategorized #ggdd in the public eye #yuehua #fandom reflections #thanks so much #ask

[yaspii]

tw for disordered eating stuff under the cut but I've been working with a dietician who specializes in individuals with ADHD and it has been truly life changing

I have had the hardest time stomaching food for the past year or so cause of my meds and sensory things from ADHD and it's only got worse from my doctor telling me to lose weight to the degree that I've lost over 30 pounds since April last year. I have tried so many things to make cooking and eating bearable but each time it's even more work. She initially guided me by trying to find foods I could always stomach that were easy to prepare. This worked for some time but eventually even the act of chewing seemed like a herculean task. At one point I just told myself to drink a glass of milk for breakfast because at least that was something.

When I told her this she immediately latched onto it and said we can work with that let's just make sure if you can't eat anything else that day you can drink 2L of this protein enriched milk and some specific vitamins. This pretty much flies in the face of any sort of nutrition advice I have found. That you need balance, that vitamins from food are better than supplements. But it only occurred to me once she put me on this diet that internalizing those things, while true for many people, did not help me, a person who in most cases can't get those nutrients any other way. I drink my milk, I try my best to eat a carb or two as well and some Chia seeds for fibre. And I feel much better than I did when I was barely eating anything, who knew! And yeah hopefully this isn't a forever thing. But I think I'll be set up for much more success on a balanced diet if I actually have energy and my mental faculties about me to go about it in a sensible way. Idk man novel brains require novel solutions and I've never felt safer with a medical professional in my life. She not only saw my unique needs and took them in without an ounce of judgment but she understood immediately that my losing weight was not a good thing despite being overweight.

#adhd #personal #food

[acornered]

2024 WISHLIST

I know Resolutions are a controversial concept but I still want to spend some time reflecting on what my goals this year were, if I accomplished them to my satisfaction, and what I'd like the next year of my life to look like. So here we go:

Purchase second-hand and locally owned as much as possible How Well I Did: Very well! I've become friends with a lot of local vintage store owners, artists, and tradespeople, and I've been able to reduce the amount of frivolous consumption I engage in significantly. Repeat in 2024: Absolutely!!!

Continue to work on my relationship with my body How Well I Did: Uh. Ooof. Um. My body changed a lot this year and it's been really hard for me to make peace with that. Regular healthy meals and consistent exercise are both difficult habits for me because of the mental illnesses, and falling off of that particular wagon, combined with finally coming to terms with my ED, has made for a rocky road to body positivity. Repeat in 2024: I need to redouble my efforts here, and actually commit to forming healthy habits around food, and making time to do a little physical activity each day. And every time I look in the mirror, I will try to challenge the negative thoughts until I can hopefully accept the inherent worth and beauty of my flesh.

Continue to work on my mental health How Well I Did: Average, I think. There were bouts of depression, and periods of inconsistency with my medication, but I am getting better every day and I have built myself a really stellar support system to pick up the slack when I need it! Repeat in 2024: Always, every year, forever. I can't imagine going back.

Nurture and honor my relationships with others, and my own wellbeing in those relationships How Well I Did: Pretty well, with only 2 notable exceptions. To the people who have helped me grow, who have loved me enough to tell me when I am wrong, who have been patient with me when I've had to assert a boundary with them-- thank you. I may not always choose well, but when I do I end up with the most beautiful, loving relationships I could ask for. Repeat in 2024: There are two specific things that I need to face down next year (one pleasant but terrifying, and one awful but necessary), and I only hope that I can do so with strength and grace and that the pain will be worth the healing it brings.

Have positive romantic and sexual experiences How Well I Did: I had moderate success with this one. While I made a real effort to put myself out there, there were moments of true despair, especially after a couple of opportunities broke down from poor communication/bad timing. However, I did manage to figure out some important boundaries, and enforce them to varying degrees of success. I'm entering 2024 still single, which is not ideal, but with a much better sense of what I'm looking for and how to ask for it. Repeat in 2024: I'm still not great at making the first move, but I am mentally projecting shoot your shot vibes to every cute girl I know, and maybe this year I'll even get an opportunity to be courageous.

Read at least 1 book every month How Well I Did: I managed around 8/12, and didn't keep track of when I read what. But I am consuming books again which is in turn helping me rediscover my love of reading and writing. I think with more of a concentrated push, I can make this happen for real! Repeat in 2024: Yep, with better documentation this time!

Conclusion: 2023 was a mixed bag, and it really ended on a low note with multiple waves of interpersonal conflict, a bad bout of depression, and an unexpected death of someone I've known since childhood. I want to start the New Year with a clean slate, but it's difficult with so many things unresolved, and a funeral service to attend in the very first week of 2024. I am determined to start slow, and find that balance between necessary rest and gratuitous wallowing. I am grateful every day that my desire to move forward, to shape the life I want for myself, overpowers my desire to lay down and never move again. At least most of the time. I promise to continue to find beauty in quiet, unlikely places, to give the kind of love I wish to receive, and make my corner of the world the kind of soft place I'd be happy to inhabit. If you've read this far, I love you and I hope you stick around. Happy New Year (almost).

#personal #acornposting #new years resolution #recovery #ed mention #negative body image mention #depression mention

[underratedbananawerewolf]

Fictober Day 7

Prompt 7: “Do you recognize this?” 

Fandom: Honkai Star Rail 

Rating: G 

Warning: None 

Yanqing hadn’t ever been in this storage room. Or at least he didn’t remember any time he had. No one had been for a while judging by the amount of dust that coated everything in here. He sneezed, placing his sleeve in front of his nose to help filter out anything he stirred up. He could feel the tickles of future sneezes and if he fell into that he’d never get this task done.  

When asking Jing Yuan about a scroll about ancient sword techniques, the man had directed him to this forgotten closet. Surely it couldn’t have been in here, could it? Although lost in the clutter of centuries, perhaps that was why those techniques weren’t used any longer. Or maybe Jing Yuan just needed to keep his retainer busy for a while.  

Searching through this mess with any sort of success would require that he organize it to some degree and, unfortunately, that would also require him to start cleaning up the dust. Hopefully without causing himself to go into an unstoppable sneezing fit.  

Ultimately, he never found the scroll he was looking for. He had pulled out practically everything, dusted and swept and then put things back into some semblance of order. Sweat had matted his hair down, his clothing streaked with grime. He looked like a right mess, and he ached to go bathe. There was one more box to go through and he had been taught not to let a task go unfished.  

With a sigh, he opened it to see what was inside. If it was junk he could set it aside for the next cycrane to take care of. If it were something else he’d have to see where it could go. Reaching in he pulled out a plush Diting, the fur on its face nearly worn away to reveal the mesh that held it together. Blinking, Yanqing stared at the toy. Something tickled the back of his memory, but he couldn’t quite grasp it.  

Setting the Diting aside, he reached again into the box. A few tattered Galaxy Ranger comic books, a soft pastel blue blanket and sheathed dagger with a bird carved into the hilt. All of them made him pause, staring at each of the objects. He knew he had seen them before and yet, he couldn’t say where he had seen them before.  

“Yanqing?” Jing Yuan’s voice came from just outside the door.  

“Here, General.”  

The man walked around the corner to look into the reasonably neat closet. “Very good, Yanqing.” He commented. “I didn’t intend for you to clean the entire room however.”  

“It was the only way I was going to ever find anything.” Yanqing answered, his eyes still on the objects. “General, do you recognize any of these?” He indicated the items spread before him as he raised his gaze to look at him. Inexplicably the smile that was almost always present faltered on Jing Yuan’s face. “What is it?”  

The man sighed and folded his arms. “They are yours, Yanqing.” He stated quietly. “The Diting was the only toy you would keep with you for months.” Yanqing’s cheeks flushed a pale pink, but his commander ignored it. “The comic books belonged to your father. There’s more of them somewhere around here. He was an avid reader, I’m told.”  

“And the knife?”  

“Your mother’s.” 

The boy glanced down at the items again before carefully placing them back in the box and then on an empty space on the shelf. The action made Jing Yuan raise an eyebrow. “you’re not going to take any of them with you?”  

“Not...yet. I want to think about it first.”  

“Understandable.” Jing Yuan raised a hand to clasp his retainer’s shoulder. “They’ll be waiting for you whenever they’re ready.”  

A small smile hovered over Yanqing’s lips as he looked up again. “Thank you, sir. I appreciate it.” 

#fictober23 #fictober day 7 #honkai star rail fic

[gg-carboxylase]

Got ahold of Step by Step episode 12. We needed 2 more episodes as usual with these series.

If you've not watched the show, please do. It's worth your time, even if you feel like you're wading thru the first few episodes. It's slow burn. This is not horny hours. This is really office hours.

Spoilers under the cut obvs.

Some meta. Mostly my opinions.

I wrote that paragraph before the Mildly Spicy Bed Makeout. I kind of enjoy that Jeng shooed Pat to the shower For Reasons. At least, I personally infer bottom reasons but that's just me. Still, I would have liked more spice à la Bed Friend, but I'm a thirsty ho.

I'll get this admission off my chest — I'm bummed that we got those really spicy kisses and that's as far as it went. KP and Domundi productions spoiled me, obviously. Did I want to see them fake fuck? Yeah. I'll admit it.

The scene where they were writing out then deleting their text messages was acted to perfection.

Hot take — Ben is the worst ugly crier. We love him anyway.

Jeng is a stalker, he needs to learn to go less hard. He also needed to resign like, 2 years earlier from the company. Good for him though. Dad is hot. Shame he's a homophobe.

I am super over people singing in the shows, no matter how good they are.

I love that Jeng's passion is cooking.

You can tell this is a real Thai show because when they show that green curry, it's real green curry even if it's store bought. It's hard to find good green curry paste over here unless you're in certain places.

Jeng's mom — what was the point of a 30 second meeting. Ben is so good at being nervous and young, he's really a great actor.

The chemistry is off the charts in this episode, good Christ. They obviously had fun shooting the cake scene.

Jeng better have a hell of a savings if he's returning all his shares to his dad and putting his hopes on his restaurant.

The restaurant biz is a bitch. I grew up in the restaurant business and the margins are razor thin, even in famous and successful restaurants. Hopefully, Pat's advertising firm is doing well.

Seriously, again. Needed another couple episodes. Especially with how Jeng's dad tossed his resignation letter.

I know Man said this would be his only BL, but I would really like to see them do another show together. They really got their shit together at the end and it's rare to see a couple that can have this kind of chemistry.

The age difference works really well between them, it's comfortable — which isn't there for a lot of decade+ couples — and there's a lot of plots where this could be used. So let's manifest that.

I have no idea what the fuck Man does for a living, so I'm not sure if he's even free to do another series. Dude has an econ degree, which means nothing (no offense econ folks, you guys are like Swiss army knives). I suspect he's a mini Mile Phakphum, and just sort of exists on the largess of his family and his modeling career.

I very much liked this series. It's definitely in my list of favorites. For me, it started out rocky because I didn't understand what it was trying to do. Looking back, now that I see what the aim is, the path it took is perfect.

Would I have liked more sex? Absolutely, but as I mentioned before — I'm a thirsty ho. These lads get paid more than I make as a clinical lab scientist, spending my day making your doctor look smart. A little bed shenanigans isn't too much to ask.

Alas, I can't complain too much. The kisses we got were A+, top-tier compared to nearly any other series. The physical stuff we did get was also A+. Truly, my complaints are mostly unfounded. We could have ended up with Korean level bullshit.

I'm not going to bother with meta about the story because there's users here that are far better at articulating exactly what I want to say, so troll the tag for them.

#step by step episode 12 #step by step series #step by step #man trisanu #ben bunyapol #jeng x pat #jeng kittiphong #pat phakphum #Loved it

[kingmaker-a]

when you get this, you have to answer with 5 things you like about yourself, publicly. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool)!!

i had to so now u too 😽

Sorry for taking so long to get to this kare. But at least I'm getting to it now. Thanks for taking the time out to send it my way even if it is basically a copy pasta, the appreciation is felt regardless 🙏

But only five things, it's so hard to narrow the list down jk. I kinda struggled hence why I've put it off.

Diverse Skillset - I'm not the best in any of the fields I've taken an interest in and I still think I could be a lot better in many regards. But those moments where it all comes together? Like with Ecdysis' banner or Minutes Before's page break feels super fucking good.

Resilience - I've made it no secret to the Paladins but I've been through the ringer before, but knowing I came out the other end alright means I know I'll survive and dear I be cringe and say that I might even thrive? Experience - Due in part to my previous answer but as a result I have experience, not necessarily wisdom per say since I still make dumb choices but hopefully Katie can back me up when I say I have some interesting stories at the very least. It helps with writing angst at least.

Willing to Fail - Something I've only really dug into recently, especially since I was and still am to some degree a perfectionist. But there's a hell of a lot more to learn in your mistakes than with your successes.

Always willing to help - I mean it's pretty straightforward but there's an enjoyment I get from helping people, though in relation to tumblr it mostly translates to me reading some of their stuff. Then pointing out what's really cool about their writing or style since I'm next to useless from a technical aspect. I dunno, I just want people to enjoy writing and hopefully love the personal flare they bring rather than thinking about the end point.

If you make the journey fun, the destination becomes an afterthought.

Thanks for the positivity <3

#someone who likes broccoli <3 #Kingmaker answers