#hyper personal. it's lived in my head all this time it's kind of weird to get it out there!

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

TF2 Mercs As Animals!

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I think these silly guys would be ultra silly as animals. Can you tell I've thought of this for a couple days now?

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TW: GORE AND BLOOD MENTION AT THE END

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Demo- Komodo Dragon!

Demo is one of these drangons for 3 reasons. Both are very smart, very dangerous, and let's be honest if demo bit you you'd probably die from some type of infection. (Maybe not, I'm pretty sure he drank hydrogen peroxide in comic 6, and I wholeheartedly believe that can't be a one-time thing).

No, but seriously, I feel like he would be one for some reason.

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Engie- Meerkat!

I think Engie would be a meerkat based mainly on the fact that they are insanely skilled builders. Meerkats are known to build super intricate underground homes. It also doesn't hurt that they are social creatures that tend to live in big groups, and are like crazy violent, even though they might not look the part.

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Heavy- Rottweiler!

Maybe an obvious choice, but! Just because its obvious doesn't mean it isn't true. Rottweilers are super friendly and loyal to their families but can also be great attack dogs. Rottweilers are strong enough to kill humans, also these dogs are UNITS! They can weigh in at 130 lbs. (58 kg). So I definitely think Heavy would be a rottweiler, or probably any big dog in general.

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Medic- Dove! (So original 😮‍💨)

Not that this idea hasn't been done to death, but hear me out! I genuinely think he'd be one. Doves are typically labeled as very clean animals with unique calls. They're also super intelligent and skilled, as we learned through carrier birds. And I think sums up Medic really well!

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Scout- African Wild Dog!

Scout definitely matches up with African wild dogs, super fast, agile, and hyper aware, and will run you down at 44 mph (70 kph) and have insane stamina when chasing down prey. They are also amazing at their hunts with an 85% success rate, so I think he'd make a good wild dog :)

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Sniper- Owl!

Sniper is 100% an owl, owls can see mice from at least six to seven feet away and have very few vertebrae in their necks, making it easy for them to look in all directions. Owls and other birds of prey would be your best bet to find a sniper in the animal kingdom!

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Spy- Ferret!

Spy is a ferret, hands down. Ferrets can be sneaky and very devious. They love to be where they shouldn't and love to mess things up. Also, cute little fact, plus a mini headcanon! (I like to think Spy can dance really well, so similarly to him, ferrets can dance!

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Pyro- Echidna!

I picked this wacky little guy for Pyro for two reasons. One, the long nose kind reminds me of Pyro's mask (could be reaching here who knows). And two, they're fireproof, well kind of. See, they can breathe through wildfires, so they don't risk smoke inhalation, which is why most people/animals die, so bonus points again for that nose being like they're mask?

ALSO, THEY ARE SO WEIRD, listen to this

"spines like a porcupine, a beak like a bird, a pouch like a kangaroo, and lays eggs like a reptile"

Insane.

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Sometimes I feel really dumb for doing these, and then I remember if even one person likes them, then it's not dumb.

I had a hard time explaining my reasoning on these 😭 I normally just look at people and assign them colors or animals in my head with no explanation as to why it fits.

Also, do you know how hard it is to find a picture of a cute Komodo dragon? Like their cool as fuck but like Jesus, you look them up and most of the time it's bloody.

SAME WITH THE AFRICAN WILD DOG!?!? I looked up "African wild dog cute" and saw one holding a monkeys face, detached from body and skull.

Mercs as works of art / mercs favorite pieces of art up next!

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #team fortress headcanons #tf2 headcanons #tf2 hcs #tf2 demoman #tf2 engineer #tf2 heavy #tf2 medic #tf2 scout #tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #tf2 soldier #tf2 pyro

[geekynightowl1997]

There are quotes that the Leverage Team is defined by. And it's something I hadn't realized until I was reading a quote that I wrote down. (I'm not sure yet what quote defines Harry and Breanna-so their gonna be excluded... unless of course you who reads this know! Please add!)

So far this is what I have;

Nate: "Your an honest man."

Sophie: "When you can't tell the truth, tell *a* truth."

Parker: "I'm not crazy!"

Hardison: "It's okay to grow up, realize you aren't the person you used to be."

Eliot: "Because you were suppose to."

I know it's silly- but each of these quotes define them in someway. (Obviously.) And I know I could be wrong- but each of these quotes tells them about their personality in a way I don't think most people realize.

At the beginning, Nate has only ever been an honest man. He knows only of the crimes because he's chased these people around the world. Always ready to catch them. He doesn't know how to be a criminal. At least- not at first. As the series progresses though- he learns the appeal of crimes. He understands what his dad loved about having a certain control and plan. Nate was a good, honest man. And even at the end of the series- he still was, even if he was a criminal.

Sophie has spent years telling *a* truth. Just not the truth. She's a well versed in playing her cards and knowing when people have reached their limit. That's her con- telling people exactly what they want to hear- or at least enough to get through it. Her life is full of lies- but what she tells people is the truth. Even if it's not the truth.

Parker has (had) a reputation of being crazy. Jumping off buildings, learning to steal cars and how to drive them, and she says the wildest of things. She lives in a warehouse (and probably other weird places.) Yet, Parker isn't crazy. Really she's not, she's just an adult who had to grow up. She watched her brother die, spent years in and out of foster homes. Learned how to steal to survive. All she really wants is to be seen and to be a child. And that's what the team gives her. The team not only gives her a family- but a chance to be a child. They don't criticize her for her love of Christmas or Santa. Yeah, sure they panic when she goes to a Chocolate festival alone- but they don't really chastise her for being hyper. Nate doesn't even reprimand her for poking Eliot. They allow her to be a child- she got her childhood to back.

Hardison has only ever been one thing; A geek. He's hacked countries, banks, corporations. He's a foster kid- who got the better end of the stick. Yet knows that not everyone is so lucky. Since joining the team; there are days where he wishes he could do more. And he tries- and he certainly is way over his head. And I think that's why Eliot and Parker's relationship/friendship is SO important. Unlike Nat and Sophie, Eliot and Parker keep him level headed. Eliot calls him out in a way that doesn't hurt his spirit, but his will. Parker reminds him that it's okay to not know things and his mistakes are important. It's a base to fall on. Hardison grows a lot through the series and he learns to lean on the team.

Eliot has a broken heart and I think that is something people don't really consider. He tries his hardest to improve. He knows he has blood on his hands and ever since then- he has tried to wash it off. I know I've mentioned this before multiple times; but Eliot is a Teddy Bear. He's soft, gentle, and kind. And maybe Damien Monreau took that from him for a while- and when he got out from under him- he slowly got that back. So here he is, trying to do what others won't do. That quote I mentioned? He was talking to a dirty cop. Cops are suppose to save people. Their suppose to care for people, protect them. That cop didn't and it fell on Eliot to protect those people- because the cops weren't doing their job. It breaks my heart- knowing that Eliot thinks he has to fix the injustice by himself.

I know there is more quotes that define their personalities- but for me those fit perfectly. Let me know if you agree/disagree. I'm always wanting to know what y'all think.

#leverage #eliot spencer #parker #alec hardison #nate ford #sophie devereaux #quotes that I think define the characters #i know its silly #but i couldn't stop thinking about it #especially the 'because you were suppose to #they all grew up honestly #they are not the same #i love them all #tell me what y'all think #agree? #disagree? #i'm willing to discuss

[kurokmask]

now that we are on Link topic. do you have any other hcs that you've not included in the fanfic? like extra info and stuff?

sorry for the late answer, college blah blah blah

there's lots that haven't made it in explicitly, but they're all still swimming in my head when im writing him. this is gonna be disorganized, sorry!

Link likes being told what to do. secretly he likes having other ppl’s expectations on him bc it gives him security, so he doesn't have to think about who he is

not Link, but every version of OoT Zelda I write is transmasc, whether thats something Zelda is truly aware of or not.

again not Link but Cremia was supposed to have a hot Gerudo pirate gf 💔 sorry girl

I kind of regret not doing more with the Ocarina of Time, and time travel in general. Like, towards the end, Link would definitely try to use it, right? I think I'm going to do a major overhaul of the Termina arc soon.

Link can cannot write more than his name.

Link was originally going to be very open about his past adventures. But i decided bottling everything up and feeling ashamed about it and letting it fester like a rotting wound would be sadder :)

sexuality was going to be a concept i explored in the fic. ultimately i wanted to keep it a T rating so i didn't do this, but. it was definitely a thing! cut things include lotsssss of Sheik baggage, boyish feelings about Kafei, weird fierce deity sex dreams and um. remember Javert?

Javert and Link wereeee... supposed to fuck! I even wrote a before and after scene LOLLL. Javert was going to play a more important role in general, being a semi-reoccurring character. He was planned to be Link's kind of """only friend""" in Castletown. Link was drawn to him because of how much older and experienced he was, and Javert took pity on Link, both in a sort of genuine but also kind of overbearing way. ultimately Link got annoyed by him pretty quickly and once he started to get to know Malon he basically ghosted him. another example of how Link struggles to balance relationships, especially those who really care for him. obviously i. didn't go further with this. but it was planned for about a year before I scrapped it. But i hope you reread their scene together to pick up on some vibes.....

since im already being disgusting um. bottom. praise kink. but he never really finds this out. how sad.

when i was first conceptualizing his character, i was actually going to write link as bipolar. I ended up writing him more adhd/autism as thats closer to my own personal experience. but its still in the back of my mind, and it definitely manifests more as he gets older. but this man has so much going on please project anything you want on him and its real he has it

OoT Link is the only Link i hc as cis bc only a cis man would fumble the bag THIS bad. put those tights on boy

i have a weird hyper-specific modern au where he's living in 1998 germany with his little brother (whos just young link). they play ddr together, he goes to acid techno raves, and dresses like this

again, in a modern au, Link would be a total audiophile. his favorite musicians would be Kate Bush, Fiona Apple, Talking Heads, the Prodigy, Devo, the Mountain Goats, Modest Mouse, Nirvana, Radiohead, Nine Inch Nails, Bjork, the Magnetic Fields-- ok ill stop

if he was an Animal Crossing villager he'd be a gold wolf with the Jock personality

that's all i can think of right now, I'm sure more will come to me and I'll write them here. thanks for the ask, thanks so much for the interest!!!!!

#ocarina of time #zelda headcanon #hero of time #god bless #sorry my mind was in the gutter for some of these LMFAO but like. this is crucial info thats cannot be included otherwise!!!! #if anyone wants me to finish/publish the Sodomy Fic as my beta-reader lovingly calls it uh. let me know

[dearinglovebot]

the lore of tgirl claire is SO rich in my head. she realizes young that she’s Different. like as soon as she gains sense of self that egg is starting to crack. but she’s like “I’m probably a girl but I’ve got a test on monday to study for so idgaf”. she has no friends mainly because she’s weird and intense (autistic) but also partially because she’s from nowhere wisconsin and everyone can kind of tell that she’s not good at being a boy but they’re not sure how to react to that. she’s subconsciously internalizing all of this.

the MOMENT she leaves for college she’s trying to get estrogen. picks a big city college specifically so she can go anonymous so no one will remember the old her. grows her hair out, does a complete wardrobe overhaul, and starts going by claire full time. within a year she’s unrecognizable.

as soon as she can, she starts living her life as stealth. she THOROUGHLY thinks over what stories in her childhood might give her away and eventually ends up staying quite about her past all together. she doesn’t have a clear idea why it feels like the world will end if people find out because she’s deeply repressed about how lonely and sad she is but she does know that the world will actually end if people find out.

jurassic world is such an appealing offer because it means she gets to move countries, pretend her boymode days never existed, distance herself from anyone who knows about it, and no one will even question if she’s cis or not because why would they? it’s like paradise for her. AND she’s the boss. so everyone is going to be too scared to pry into her life or question her.

but she’s so invested in keeping up appearances that it genuinely ruins any social life she might develop. she’s in constant denial that she’s lonely because she didn’t even have friends growing up so this is all NORMAL and she’s so NORMAL and WELL ADJUSTED. she’s weary around making any friends and she’s especially weary about having queer friends because none of that is worth even the suspicion of having connections to queerness.

it seeps into her relationship with karen, who is the most supportive and strongest advocate she ever had. but karen was also there for every moment of her childhood and it makes her cringe to think about. so she leans into avoidance because it’s so much easier. zach, too. but with him, his first years happened with her in early transition, so she’s always hyper aware of that. realistically, zach has only ever known her as aunt claire, but in her head, she can’t shake that same “the world is going to end” mentality.

and it’s almost understandable to be so cautious. she’s a high powered woman with a reputation to keep. let alone all the personal danger it can bring. it’s all rooted in valid fear which is what also makes it tragic. but it’s to the point of constantly affecting her mental health. it’s another part of the persona she builds at jurassic world as the frigid, untouchable boss…

anyways I’m really normal about this headcanon and I think about it a normal amount

#jurassic world #claire dearing #trans posting

[emile-hides]

For the ask game! Ramattra?

The man who got me my first 1,000 note post. Yeah I got the think thonks on him for sure.

One aspect about them I love

He's not as inherently cruel as you'd expect him to be. In fact, he's hardly cruel at all. He takes time before a mission to get to know his human teammates and is even willing to socialize with them, despite his apparent hatred for the species. Given how we know people who hate Omnics treat their Omnic teammates before a fight... It's rather surprising I think.

One aspect I wish more people understood about them

This is one I see in a lot of X Readers that make me regret making that gif but look. Guys look.

Just because a man is big with a deep voice does not mean he's going to walk you on a leash and call you his mutt.

Ramattra is not a dominator of any kind, sexually or otherwise. He's the only Overwatch character who actively kinkshames that very specific thing. He hates that Genji follows Zenyatta around like a little lost puppy, actively calls him disgusting over it.

He is not a violent person either. He didn't want any of this. He doesn't want to lead armies and have other tremble under his thumb and do every little thing he commands.

I'm just personally very tired of the Violent Dominate Ramattra X Readers... he's a softie actually... I would like more overrun with anxiety because he has no clue how humans work and actively fears hurting them on accident Ramattra X Reader...

Headcanons I have about this character

I've said this one to a handful of friends but one of my instant Ramattra takes is that he is constantly, beyond his control, scanning for threats around him, and all Humans as perceived as threats to his internal scanners. He's always hyper aware of the humans around him, how they're moving, breathing, speaking, their critical weakpoints, any potential weapons they may have, etc etc. To the point that he struggles to distinguish an ally from an enemy human while in the midst of battle.

Everything he does that might seem odd was in effort to appear more... Friendly to humans during his time in the Shambali. He's a very big Omnic, not the biggest, but bigger than average, and his model type being Generals in the Human Killing Army is enough to put everyone around him on edge, which he of course picks up, and it puts him on edge. So he does weird human things like Breath, Stutter, Hum, Cough. Anything to make himself a little more human.

He hates a lot about himself. He hates how big he is, he hates his original purpose, he hates the human traits he picked up and can't let go, he hates that his default is violence, he hates the sound of his voice when he yells, he hates the constant threat display in his head, he hates his creation and his creator and the brother who made him feel welcomed like he could be accepted despite all these things he hates about living as himself.

I don't think he wanted to lead an army or extinguish the human race. But it's what he was built for, and if no matter what he does people will only ever see him as what he was at the start, then why try changing that? He's on a self destructive mission, yes to save his kind, his dying race, his family, but also just to get away from the fantasy he'd built up of being someone different than who he is. Someone smaller and gentler and more... human. That clearly can't happen. It's not an option for him.

I think Ramattra's a Trans Woman.

One character I love seeing them interact with

I really love his interactions with Bastion!! And Zenyatta as well!!! I know it says one character but they way he speaks to them both is so!!!!!! Cute!!!

The little twigs comment in his canon interaction with Bastion!! The lore and bond he had with Zenyatta in the past!!! God it's my everything!!!

One character I wish they would interact with/interact with more

My friend @ow-old-men got me really really into the idea of him interacting with Orisa (curse you OW2) and just. Experiencing the world along side her. Two Omnics made for violence redefining themselves in familial rolls

Does Orisa know what a woman is? No. But she's still the first one to use She/Her Pronouns for Ramattra because she knows.

Headcanons I have that involve them with other characters

Orisa is Ramattra's egg cracker this is why Blizzard won't let them interact

I think he's the reason Mondatta was assassinated. It was part of the deal with joining Talon, he agreed to assist them if they could take Mondatta out. It was a deal he regretted making almost immediately

Because of his hostility to humans, Maximilien is required to be in every meeting Ramattra is in, for his personal comfort.

Do they actually talk? God I hope so. I hope they kiss on the mouth while they're at it. But also I think Ram would hate Max, because he's just too human. Ramattra has no room to talk though, what with his bad habit of breathing and all that.

Akande really likes Ramattra, likes his manner of holding himself and his conviction. Ramattra hates Akande and really really really wants him to leave him alone.

I think the idea of Ramattra figuring out Reaper's identity and constantly threatening his life is incredibly good fanon content that should continue

Zenyatta, for a very long time, hated and was more hostile to humans than Ramattra. This is why Ramattra brought him to the Shambali, to get away from humans.

#Overwatch #Headcanons #Thankyou for asking #Sorry about that big thing in the middle there #I have. Many Ramattra feelings #I have many Omnic feelings in general but Ramattra specifically gets me running laps #He's just so????? *Rattles him* You know??????? #Ramattra plagued with intrusive thoughts and Eldest Daughter Syndrome decides to end humanity #because clearly no one else will #The Brother version of Encanto's Surface Pressure did this to me #It's a Ramattra song for sure #Mental image of Mondatta finding Ramattra in New York after his awakening #Ramattra the only survivor of a brutal battle caked in blood and oil with a gun with one round left #He points it at Mondatta in terror scared to death of everything shaking and full of new feelings #Mondatta hugs him staining his beautiful white robes in blood and oil sharing his brother's burdens #Ramattra clinging to him feeling safe for the very first time #This is a very important scene in my head and I would draw it if I had any artistic talent whatsoever #Anyway that's all my Ramattra takes on the table thanks for asking

[kitnita]

Talk Hockey To Me

(tag game)

tagged by @eliooliver83 @oetter & @txstars!! mwah thank you!!!

1. The thing that got you hooked on hockey

i am a lifelong member of the 'being insane about sports' club in that i still have a poster of my baseball team's 2005 roster hanging over my bed & used to get SO pissed in middle school when boys in my class had incorrect college basketball opinions. but hockey was just? never on my radar?? due to the south texas of it all. then i went to college for broadcast in new york state & made friends with some guys majoring in sports broadcast and was like wait ....... there's a sport they talk about that i can't talk about (i loved knowing more about sports than boys so this was a serious blow) (football doesnt count i decided when i was a kid that i didn't care about football therefore its not real) & a friend of mine with whom i watched the world series was like no i've got you i can get you into hockey. i realize now she just wanted an excuse to proselytize about the new york islanders.

but anyway yeah!! i stuck with being fond of them because of her & then added the stars because as a Texan i had to root for them & also tyler seguin hooked me. i was a casual fan until there were absolutely No Sports in 2020 & i accidentally stumbled upon hockeyblr just in time to get hyper mega insane about hockey before the bubble playoffs.

2. Your first ever fandom friend

like any normal well adjusted person i feel weird calling someone my friend even if we're friendly because what if they don't actually like me (again this is normal & well adjusted behavior) that said tanya txstars was the first hashtag mutual i had in starsblr whomst i feel like i talked to via the tags!!

3. The jersey you would most like to own

wait have i ever mentioned that i own a mooterus jersey. it was like eighty dollars off depop because its a) womens cut & b) a size small which means that while it does technically fit, my tits stop it from looking like, you know, a jersey should look on the human body. so i'd love one that i can wear without feeling ridiculous!! through logan stankoven all things are possible!!! i'm generally a jersey thrifter so i do love the $16 tyler jersey i found but im sure one day ill bite the bullet and buy a non-secondhand otter jersey.

4. YOUR player (you only get ONE so choose wisely)

unfortunately goalies are inherently endearing & then on top of that he's also insane in the most confounding way possible so jake oettinger is My Guy whether he likes it or not

5. A pairing that deserves more fic

as someone who has written just over half of the robotter fic out there in the world: please put more robotter fic out there in the world. also i think robo & otter both deserve to fuck otter's goalie partner. also also it's not technically a pairing but i think we as a people need to embrace delly's clear & evident love for throuples and start sticking him in other peoples relationships. it's what he would want <3

6. Your favourite on-ice moment

jason robertson laying flat on his back on the ice after finishing his first career hat trick lives in my head rent free btw. if you even care. it just plays on a fucking loop up there. also the the dellymiro delly's first goal celly. also also that time those flames fans tried to actually curse jake midgame. like on the one hand what the fuck but on the other hand i actually admire that kind of dedication yk

THEN

link someone else's art/fic/etc that you love & think everyone should check out

i'm still foaming at the mouth over @txstars's rule 63 robotter fic!! also i think it's clear what robo ship i've dedicated myself to but everyone in the roboroope trenches is soooo impressive to me. i see the vision. @winningmachine's stats guy robo fic is a foundational text. thank you @starscelly for also giffing insane random things during games. there's so many other fun people in starsblr specifically & hockeyblr generally but see above re: being normal and well adjusted so You Know Who You Are & also I Love Your Work

AND

link something you made & are proud of & want people to see

my magnum opus ............ the robotter primer. linking anything else feels weird BUT please enjoy my unhinged labor of love. i saw someone mentioned it to that gay hockey tournament blog but didnt want to link it?? please link it places. put how unhinged i was/am about them on blast.

tagging @coffeehound91 @moregraceful @hintzy!!! & also idk who has and hasn't been tagged so if you see this & would like to do it please do & feel free to tag me as the person who tagged you because i am a certified nosy bitch & love seeing other people talk about themselves <3

#tag game #long post // #i NEVER remember to do these i feel so weirdly proud of myself. sorry for how many times i dropped the word also #were i a hockey player i giffed & transcribed 'also' would be the filler clutch that drove me insane à la 'you know' or 'i mean' #sorry this is so long also. i can't shut up

[d1gnan]

some thoughts abt aesthetics, the way people engage with my art so far and also stuff youll be seeing from me in the next year..

first off i wanna say im not actually educated on any of this and its all just coming from personal experience/ its kind of just a mad mans rambling

im the kind of person who is always curating, always putting like with like (on a consistently changing/personal/almost random metric that spans like any kind of media , things tangible and abstract, my memories, yadda yadda (everyone does this to some degree but as an artist and an introspective person, i find it hard to just let stuff go once i form a connection. (and im sure a lot of u guys reading this are like this too, tumblr is like The website for people like this) im hyper aware of everything that ever happens to me and im always trying to connect everything with everything else

(forgive me too in advance cause ive never been satisfied with my ability to explain myself and usually i just let everything i do speak for itself/dont bother trying. im really really visual and i usually think of things In pictures too so it just frustrates me to try and describe something thats worth a thousand words..

jewelry came pretty quickly to me as a favorite art form because its a way to convey some of what goes on in my head when i engage with the media i like , being able to turn all these pretty abstract feelings into colors shapes symbols.. a lot of times when i listen to something or watch something, i get almost itchy with the feeling of needing to get the way i percieved it out into the world in a visual and tangible way asap before it loses its original shape or before i forget how it made me feel. (dementia runs in my family so a lot of my art is trying to archive my feelings since i know i wont have them forever.. its almost a frantic need to be seen/known by others before its too late.

a lot of the jewelry ive custom made for people has been specifically music and film related, and thats been a great thing because i can both 1) make something that satisfies my own vision of the thing but 2) it is still easily readable by others as related 2 the source material because the design language usually is distinct enough to withstand being skewed too much by my own personal associations

moving forward tho, i have a TON of ideas for way more personal/abstract/highly conceptual projects, and have been slowly gathering pieces so that i can do full justice to my vision for them.

doing this has first and foremost always been an art form/way to express myself . i do it because of the ideas, i do it because i have to do it, and then im left with a bunch of stuff that i would like way more to be in the hands of someone who relates to it. and, i do it in a way thats not at all good for being a business owner. if i'm going to create a product, i would be going against my ideals if i didnt try to battle with all the things i hate about products. fast fashion and aliexpress craft supplies and mass production.. (to have a successful business you need a lot of the same product, it needs to be easy to make and you need to be able to get your materials cheap. all of which i can't and wouldn't do, so it's a very shit thing to attempt to make a living off of..

maybe this sounds a little funny too when you look at my work and then at what i have to say about it.that i think about it so seriously since it's something any one can do. my kid sister makes jewelry, it's a pretty accesible hobby. the idea of making jewelry based off of media is also the furthest thing from unique, which brings me thinking about the reception of my art online so far, and some weird stuff i've noticed.

when you're making anything that you mention is directly "inspired by" something else, you run into some pretty weird habits from others online, and a kind of unique way of engaging with "aesthetics" thats started in the past couple years. what im talking about now is less movies/music. its stuff that blurs the line between an existing body of work to reference and just a concept. ( y2k, fill in the blank-core, frutiger metro/aero).. i'm really into most eras of these fashion / design trends/aesthetics in a historian/archivist kind of way, and i really enjoy to do work inspired by things like this, but these are always way more personally influenced than anything made for a movie/music. i went semi-viral (feels so dumb to say seriously lol) on tiktok for a frutiger metro/sleepyhead by passion pit inspired bracelet.

i get hate on most posts on tiktok since its a gigantic platform(as well as praise) but the majority of comments always tend to be people correcting the authenticity to the aesthetic ive listed as an inspiration. people way smarter than me have way better things to say on this, and if i tried to go too into detail with it this post would be even crazy longer, but ive seen people call it "what aesthetic is this" culture, (some examples of this: " "this aesthetic is called this, not that" "this aesthetic is from this time frame only" xyz

i never know what to do, because i want to respond by explaining that i see these aesthetic names/labeling system solely as a tool. to help people find and connect like with like. labeling aesthetics is just recognizing a pattern. knowing the "name" of an aesthetic can help you find similar things, but there are no set time periods to any of this unless you are specifically making something that is an exact recreation of something else or making a period piece. everything comes back in some way over and over again. rigidly defining aesthetics is flawed/missing the point because aesthetics are completely individual/unmeasurable/skewed by experiences/memories/opinions. its a little different too when it comes to stuff thats actually like made For marketing cause that Will have an exact language that goes with it or whatever, but most of the time i see people arguing about an aesthetic thats not even applicable. there are genuinely no rules to what fits an aesthetic because anything you create, you add your own experiences to and are effectively continuing these patterns in a new way/ sometimes creating a whole new movement or sub category if you are really into labeling it as something directly. peoples personal art is definitely affected by their time/whatever the common design language was at the time, so thats where a lot of the names get born, but when you make it this rigid thing , "this needs to be more like this.. this needs to be more like that.." you'd be right- but only in the sense that yes, it IS that way, For You. in your mind you experience it that way, it is your personal relation to seeing these patterns. and you can use these aesthetic tools to expand on what was done before you, you can use these images to convey your own perspective so that i can try to understand it.

marketing vs personal aesthetics is a different thing that idk how to tackle with my like super limited language but for example, when someone is using a popular aesthetic to sell you something, you can tell. it's shallow and impersonal. looking back on ads that are dated and use a certain aesthetic usually tinges them with nostalgia that you can take and make into something that it wasn't because you have this priceless new angle to look at it with. if you believe in aesthetics as being this rigid thing, you dont get new ideas, you dont get new sub aesthetics, you dont get new movements, you get a copy of a copy, you get shein clothes. and! anyone can call anything they want an "aesthetic" ..any collection of things together influenced by anything in the world can be an entirely new aesthetic.. and im so sick of typing the word aesthetic

but i know that if theyre commenting something like this, they r so fundamentally different from me/ engage with the world in such a different way then i do that it would be a waste of time to try to explain..

i am a little scared when i launch some of the new projects i've been working on they'll be met with this kind of reaction. maybe ill try to write some kind of TLDR, some kind of zine to send along with any of my bracelets, some kind of manifesto about sustainability/personalization/mindful consumpution.. but it takes a long time for me to feel good about explaining myself, even this post ive deleted and restarted countless times.

ill post some more about some of the "aesthetics " (i gotta figure out better language for this shit i swear to god) ive found inspiring that have heavily influenced these upcoming projects, as well as scans from books ive collected that match the design language and i definitely want to release kind of a companion zine with the collections that include music/fashion/home photos etc...

if u have any thoughts or anything about any of this id love to hear it, or answer questions or expand on shit, this is kind of just like a word version of me throwing mac and cheese up at the ceiling and seeing if anything sticks.

thanks to anyone whos said anything nice about my stuff, i love u guys more than lyfe

and if you read all of this youre a g

💚

#d1gsart #talk tag #artists on tumblr #art #dinner party #dnr pty

[polychaeteworm]

Here it is, the long awaited pin post (will be edited later)

If I have followed you and you are a dark/horror/goth/traumacore or Saltburn blog, it was @neurotheascars that hit the follow button.

(currently only on mobile)

Hello I'm Orn, I'm the alien system host of a 31 year old human body with 8 alters inside, this is just my blog though. I'm a mixed media artist and I know more mediums then I can remember to count. I give advice compulsively so if you have a weird art supply question my inbox is open and anons are on. I know all about glue, polymer, proper glitter use, and UV colors.

Aro/ace-spec, into men as a man and women as a women.

I'm also a green wizard and I've been doing weird art based magic for about 11 years

On this blog you'll find a nice mixed bag of the following: Precambrian explosion and Paleo fun, speculative biology, green magic and experimental occult content, 420 weed posting, plants, pendantic info dumps, artwork(both mine and not), web 1.0 tech nostalgia and autism/did/disability content!

I was formally diagnosed with the demand avoidant flavor of ASD when I was 7 and can't live alone but remain very independent in spite of my support needs. I have lots of trouble wording things and as an alter I've become hyper verbal out of a fear of being misinterpreted. ABA therapy abused my system into having a pretty convincing mask so Sorry Not Sorry but I am a living breathing wall of text in this space.

Other bs I deal with- DID, hypermobility, fibromyalgia, dyspraxia, low vision/legal blindness, irlen syndrome, complex synesthesia, hyperphantasia, and really uncontrolled maladaptive daydreaming

I grow cannabis in a legal state and use it to treat my various issues.

I am posic and objectum about plants and old technology and that is liable to come out a lot on this blog. I currently have a courting/platonic relationship with a Philodendron Solleum Named Basaran and a committed platonic partnership with a large MFC office printer named Leviathan. I've had several committed romantic relationships with older computers, but currently don't have an alive and well computer partner.

Other blogs I'm connected to:

My irl human(dog) partner is @guromechanical TW: don't go here if you're not fucked in the head 18+

@neurotheascars Saira's side blog, trauma holding alter, goth aesthetics and vent posts. TW for traumacore, unreality and blood/SH specifically. If you are a Saltburn, traumacore, or otherwise dark gothic blog it is most likely Saira that has followed you.

If Saira is co-fronting or informing a post here, it will be tagged with ⚔️

Saira has more severe difficulty with communicating and needs a bit more patience than me.

Finally:

Some things about interacting with me:

I sometimes struggle to reply to people in a timely manner, but you can always poke me for a response.

I never ask bad faith questions or make bad faith assumptions. I'm a safe person to talk to if you struggle to understand language because I have alters that struggle like that. If I'm not understanding something, an analogy usually helps.

I practice kindness and I will match your energy. I am a high empathy autistic and this means the worst name I'm gonna call anyone is an asshole and asshole is a title that is temporary and fleeting because even the humans I hate are humans who are alive and make mistakes. I dislike making people feel bad so I do not hurl insults. If you give me anon hate I'm just gonna wish you well. Anger is born of pain, even if misplaced. I receive rage like a wall, so don't bruise your fists on me please.

I try not to follow minors but if I have followed you for any reason and you don't want me to follow you just lemme know and I'll comply. No issues.

I prefer minors to not follow me, but reblogging @ing, hearting, ect is totally fine.

#pinned post #about #orn rambles

[endlich-allein]

"There's a rather remarkable feature on Kovacs' new album: none other than Rammstein's Till Lindemann lends his voice to the hyper-personal title track 'Child Of Sin'. The singer from Brabant explains how that came about. "It turns out that I lived 500 meters from him without knowing it."

Yes, it's quite a gap, from 2018 to 2023. Longer than the intention was to come up with a new album. But yes, as it goes: Kovacs wanted a new manager, a new label, she was struggling with herself, and then covid came. 'Life', concludes the singer, who is currently putting the dots on the i with regard to her album Child Of Sin. "I've come to realize more and more that I just have to be independent. I was with Warner for years, but it didn't quite work. There were too many people with ideas, it was getting further and further away from me. The past few years have been quite intense mentally. Music was always my outlet, and it didn't really work anymore. That means you have to go back to yourself. I now live in a converted pigsty in my parent's backyard. I started painting, taught myself how to sew. And I started making music.”

We first met Sharon Kovacs in 2016, when she debuted with the album Shades Of Black and the beautiful single 'My Love', a cinematic soul pop anthem reminiscent of the great songs of Shirley Bassey and the well-crafted modern soul of Amy Winehouse. And Kovacs is not a far cry from those big stars. It is a special one, you saw and heard that immediately. In interviews she revealed herself and her violent past. She was abused at a young age, which left traces throughout her childhood. “I never knew my biological father, my mother was not ready for children,” she sums up. ‘I was largely raised by my grandparents, but when I was eleven I was removed from home. As I grew up, I became sexually weird and very active, very young. People thought that was gross, and I always had the feeling that there was something "dirty" about me. In recent years I have been going back to the child in me a lot in therapy. I've had to tell that kid over and over that it's okay, that it's not her fault."

Master of suffering

A child for gallows and wheel, or as Kovacs calls it in her song: 'Child Of Sin'. It is her most intimate, vulnerable song to date, as she has to peel off the protective layers she built around herself after being abused at a young age. “Many times I thought I made it all up. I was also misunderstood at the time, and my abuser tried to manipulate me in all sorts of ways. My family now recognizes things retrospectively, and it's a dark thought that many things that have happened in my life were not necessary. I felt unsafe.”

It's no wonder that Kovacs didn't really dare to sing this song on her own. And when her manager asked if she wouldn't mind recording it as a duet, only one name came to mind: Till Lindemann, lead singer of Rammstein. A band where Kovacs felt a connection from an early age - from the time when MTV played 'Sonne' non-stop. And a song like 'Puppe' from 2019, where the main character pulls the head off a doll in a blind rage, hits Kovacs. Till Lindemann, a master at portraying suffering and not afraid to dig deep into himself. But yes, the frontman of just about the largest touring rock band in Europe. “I thought: I know someone who has worked with him in Berlin. I have one chance.”

500 meter

And miraculously, that attempt arrived. There was no record company or publisher involved. It was Lindemann himself who called: 'I heard that we are going to record a duet.' Kovacs: 'He thought it was a beautiful song, and he invited me to his house. It turns out that I lived 500 meters from him in Berlin for a year, and he sometimes visits places in the city where I also like to go. What kind of places? Um, I don't know, haha. Till was very cooperative and interested. He wanted to know the context, he wanted me to feel comfortable with it. We have built a special relationship. He calls me "my crazy friend". If I had been with a label this would never have worked, it would have been printed. I did all this alone.”

Lindemann sings the second verse of 'Child Of Sin', in English. That was what he wanted most, says Kovacs. And the collaboration didn't stop there, because the German also came to Amsterdam to record a video clip. “He was very sweet,” says Kovacs of that day. “He said to me at one point: you flutter like a bat, take it easy! Yes, I know, I replied. I just want the best for your baby. He really understands how important this is to me.”

The album Child Of Sin can be listened to everywhere from today, and the video clip with Till Lindemann will also be released this afternoon."

#this afternoon #child of sin #i didn't know kovacs but what a voice !! and what a painful past she is brave #till is love 🖤 #till lindemann #t.lindemann #t.lindemann 2023 #sharon kovacs

[mbrainspaz]

I can't tell if I'm misunderstanding local culture or if my coworkers are just the rudest people on earth: A sort of tumblr AITA.

Any other south Texans out there, care to add your two cents?

I've lived in several cultures with wildly different gift giving practices so I'm pretty adaptable but since starting my current job in south Texas I'm at a loss for the first time. Having been a person who's struggled to afford food in recent years the best way I know to show gratitude and camaraderie is by gifting and sharing necessities like food, clothing, and shelter. I've always loved cooking for other people. Granted I do cook some weird stuff like curry and gluten free snacks so I don't expect people to want everything I make. I have a pretty stellar track record though. At my old office my deserts were legendary. Still, I'm not offended when someone turns down gifts of any kind. I wouldn't want anyone to feel obligated to give me anything in return.

Well... I wouldn't have been offended a few rejected gifts, but these people have accepted literally NOTHING I've tried to give them all year—usually just by tossing it aside on a dusty shelf or leaving it sitting out so that I find it later, spoiled. The muffins I made? Left on the counter for 3 days until I finally threw them out. The pumpkin pie with cool whip on thanksgiving? Left sitting on a workbench overnight. The nice warm waterproof coat I made available for the kid who only has a hoodie? Shoved in a dusty sink full of spiders. The spare room in my company house: always open, but they've told me they slept in their cars instead. I've even offered them full access to my kitchen (on the worksite) in case they ever need a snack or a sandwich and NOT ONCE—not even during severe storms—have they ever asked for so much as a breath mint.

I can't wrap my head around it! If someone had offered me any of these things while I was struggling or even just as a kind gesture I would've done everything in my power to show them how grateful I was even if I didn't want whatever they were sharing. The one coworker has literally come up to me at work and talked about how they couldn't afford anything but canned beans for a week—BESTIE, you could've helped yourself to a whole steak I had in the fridge! Or a vegan burger! Have I not told you so a dozen times?! I know what you're thinking: "They clearly hate you!" Not particularly. At least, I try not to let the paranoia get to me. We get along well enough on most other fronts. But wait—there's more!

They also rudely reject all gifts from our boss and clients. A client gave us special cooling scarves in the heat of the summer and I made sure to thank her and be seen wearing mine (it was super nice), and what did my coworkers do with theirs? They're still in the box in the back of a dusty bin. A coffee maker? Also left in its box for 9 months. A mug of hot chocolate? Left to mold. Leftovers of fried chicken and pizza from work meetings goes bad in the break room fridge every time (if I don't eat it). The candy and snacks our boss brings 'round on holidays ends up sitting in the feed room unopened for months (until I finally take it). Sometimes clients bring leftover desserts or donuts, and if I don't take those and put them away they will also sit out until they calcify.

It's no wonder I'm the only one who gets gifts from clients most of the time—I know how to at least ACT grateful. Even if you don't want the thing it's about basic manners.

My two coworkers come from different cultural backgrounds in the sense that one has a rich family and the other has always lived in poverty. Both still own land, horses, and big trucks (because Texas). Both are from south Texas and haven't spent a lot of time in other cultures. My best guess is that this is some kind of sick hyper-individualist mentality bullshit in action. I just don't get it.

No matter what culture you're from I'm pretty sure it's always downright rude to reject gifts the way they do. I'm to the point where I've decided to stop trying to give them anything and I just hope that doesn't make me the bad guy. I'm tired of being insulted for no reason and I hate to see food go to waste. Really at a loss here.

#aita #ungrateful #coworkers #life of a texan peasant #poverty #gift giving #american culture #texan culture #ramble #long text post

[werewolf-transgenderism]

i must know any and all merlin opinions please

ok this is LONG sorry I have many thoughts about this!!!!

Robert de Boron’s Merlin gives us a more in-depth look at Merlin’s odd childhood: he’s the child of a demon and a mortal woman, and the resulting magical powers that he possesses make for a childhood where he is simply out of time and out of place. He engages in a sort of “crip time” where everything collapses backwards and forwards simultaneously as he performs the tasks he needs to perform in order to fulfill his fated role, marking him as an other and not allowing him to fit neatly into the spaces he occupies in the present due to his looking toward the past and future.

Merlin as a child kind of freaks out the people around him, because he’s got all of these timelines converging in his mind and he’s got this skill for precocious speech that one wouldn’t expect from, like, a little kid. Jes Battis, reading these scenes in de Boron’s Merlin, argues, “a lot of hyper-verbal kids on the spectrum will get this portrayal of a kid who tends to unnerve adults with non-traditional language. Non-verbal kids on the spectrum run into similar problems as a result of their silence, which is never actually silence, but rather non-verbal interaction” (Thinking Queerly 35). Merlin, in de Boron’s text, is unable to connect with other kids his age due to his very apparent difference, and also finds himself often needing to withdraw from society into isolation to regulate himself, which Battis suggests we might read “as the strategy of someone who is easily overwhelmed—someone who flees to the woods in order to escape the sensory overload of court” (34).

From its medieval origins into modern medievalist adaptations, Merlins across the Arthurian tradition also experience an inherent neuroqueerness coming from the prophetic position they occupy. Merlin simply does not interact with the world in the same way that other people do—he can’t, when he’s got the anxieties of the past and the future weighing on him at all times, lifetimes of knowledge condensed into one person who is necessarily both within and outside of himself. He’s unpredictable, a bit unhinged, and often, as a result of his prophetic and magical powers, he’s seen by others as cold, unfeeling, and uncaring, but that couldn’t be further from the truth—he’s bursting with lifetimes of feeling that he simply cannot express in ways that are easy for those around him to interpret. (And here is where I go on my personal tangent about the inherent feeling of being out of time/out of place as an autistic person interacting with a neurotypical world that is simply not made to accommodate the ways we differ from the norm. I’ve been told I’m unfeeling and emotionless and that I speak weirdly and think in ways that don’t make sense to allistic people and I just!! have to scream!! I am SO full of feelings and emotions and love, etc., I just don’t express myself in the same ways as allistic people do!)

Merlin, across traditions, displays a neurodivergence where he’s always out of place, engaging in the kinds of neuroqueer rhetoric that M. Remi Yergeau describes as coming into being “through movement and the residues of movement, through creeping, sidling, ticcing, twitching, stimming, and stuttering” (Authoring Autism 76). Think of Sword in the Stone Merlin! He’s always stuttering, always having difficulty expressing his ideas verbally, always running into communication failures because he’s got so much knowledge from so many times and places bouncing around in his head that he simply interacts with the world in different ways from others who don’t share these experiences. Or even Merlin Merlin, with all his gumby awkward weirdness that he’s always getting into trouble with because of his magic and his destiny! Merlin’s a weird little guy, variously mad, always misunderstood, always living through a world that’s not made to accommodate his ways of thinking and being—which echoes, for me, the experience of being autistic SO clearly.

#sorry this is very long but you did ask lmao #I don't know how to put text in a readmore sooooooo #merlin my beloved weird wizard I could have written waaaay more about this but I figured one single-spaced page was more than enough #long post

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

for the fic writer asks: 3, 15, and 18!!

3: What’s a fic idea that you have but haven’t written yet?

oof, there's a lot. i'm very longwinded and i hyperfixate easily, which is a recipe for fics that take a long time to make and then never gets made. 

the all stars:

bucky barnes designated driver au: a personal fave, no idea if i'll ever write it in full but i hope i do. bucky barnes, fresh out of hydra, ends up stumbling into hell's kitchen and meets its devil. matthew murdock has an air of such good natured, reckless stupidity that usually manifests in a violent back alley street fight that it punches through decades of hydra programming because jesus christ, this man is terminally, dangerously stupid. why is that so familiar. this is one of the most chaotic things i've ever come up with and i love it with my whole heart. it's one of my favorite peter parkers i've ever come up with in it. he's so feral. may is where he gets it from. she is in a polycule with frank castle and karen page. it's so fun.

peter parker roommates au: weird cosmic energy linked the three peters from nwh and let them do what america chavez does, just with each other's universes. they immediately use this fact to save on rent costs by moving in together. multiverse shenanigans ensue. this one i'm probably going to write after i wrap up a few other projects.

time travel au: probably never going to write this one unfortunately, which is a shame, because it's an absolute party. matt murdock and peter parker are sent back to their old bodies in a freak magic accident. they immediately decide not to tell the fucking wizards this happened, because the fucking wizards ruin everything trying to "preserve the timeline" and "not destroy the multiverse as they know it." it's fine, peter did the math and they only have like a 13ish% chance of destroying space and time, trapping everyone in an endless void where death and escape will be impossible and those are like, AMAZING odds. and they sort of need those odds because they got booted back to the day that frank castle's family died and they simply fucking immediately saved them with no regard for the consequences. featuring a peter who refuses to be swayed by the fact that he's fucking thirteen again, he's going to airdrop the CIA's files to the entire state of new york, a matt who insists that he is aware that peter is like, thirteen and allergic to grass but this is one of his best friends, it's not weird, a frank who has no idea who these fucking people are, and a karen and foggy who got together and immediately sailed over the relationship hurdle of both mutually finding matt to be unspeakably attractive when he engages in open and honest communication, stumbled right into the most awkward seduction of all time. everyone is so stupid, except for peter, who is using this less of a romance opportunity and more as an opportunity to commit federal crimes.

Spider-Man v Kingpin x2: I have these two really different plot lines of Peter Parker versus the kingpin that’s like, cat and mouse, mind games, suspense type things. An older peter parker than what I currently have on my account, post nwh, that kind of showcases his ability to hold his own in the new york underground. Ensemble vigilante cast for both, but in very different ways. disney hire me i would make either of these into an eight episode series in a second. 

De-fridging the punisher's family: okay so like, i think there's a distinction between all “my wife/kids/girlfriend/family died and now i have to commit gratuitous acts of violence” backstories and fridging that's like, bad writing (even though it almost always is bad writing, very few writers have pulled it off) and i don't actually think frank castle's backstory is bad writing. that being said, i LOVE undoing it. i do not know why i am hyper fixated on the castles, but i am. they are alive and they live in my head. i have wayyy too many stories that are focused on the castle family. i do not know why. my favorites:

Maria Castle was Jack Murdock's kid sister AU--probably one of the sadder ones of the bunch. Maria is the painfully estranged aunt of Matt Murdock, who she recently bumped into, only to find that he looked like someone kicked the shit out of him. In an effort to make sure he's okay, she tries to revive ties long since buried. She invites him to join her family on their tradition in Central Park.

"Castles for Christmas" AU--Winter break is here, the dorms have plumbing issues, Foggy has a mandatory trip visiting a horrible bitch of a great aunt who doesn't want any blind best friends tagging along, and Matt says "I have a place to stay" when the place is an old mattress next to the boiler in Fogwell's. Meanwhile, Agent Orange takes a very different approach to the problem of Frank Castle and steals his kids. Matt Murdock hears a couple of kids in trouble and decides to handle it himself. When the kids' father tracks him down afterwards--well, nightmare scenario, but they aren't ratting him out to the cops, so it's as good as it can go. The problem: these people are fucking insane and their mission of "thank the nice young man who saved our kids" turned into "fully kidnap him and force him to live in their guest bedroom because they have an exaggerated sense of duty and this man is living like a fucking goblin." Featuring a matt who's like, trying to politely explain to the Castles that he appreciates the concern, but also this is a fucking kidnapping, like there's literal zip ties involved, like seriously this is a felony, a castle family who has decided that if frank keeps dragging him off the windowsill before he can wriggle his way to freedom then maybe they'll give him stockholm syndrome and it will be a nonissue, and a foggy who is wondering if his best bro has been enslaved by a suburban family of four to make gingerbread men.

Maria Castle Matt Murdock Best Bros Au--at the start of his Daredevil career, Matt saves a random suburban housewife mid-mugging--only she was in the process of saving herself and Matt gets clipped with a bullet in the process. the injury to his person is minor. the injury to his pride is major when random suburban housewife pistol whips him in a moment of panic, proceeds to kidnap masked man for medical treatment. The thing is 1) she hates the PTA 2) it's so hard to make adult friends with you know, kids and everything 3) she is extraordinarily okay with aiding and abetting and 4) this man is her dumbass little brother now, look at him, he's so ridiculous and pathetic, she can't not bully him, this is an excellent life decision curtis calm DOWN. featuring a curtis who does not want to be a part of this, please and thank you, maria stop calling him, and a frank still in Afghanistan, under the impression that this is his wife's new gay best friend instead of like. a man she met via vigilante justice.

15: Are there words, phrases, mannerisms or scenes you tend to use a lot?

Uhhh, i overuse stuff like “(s)he sighs” or “(s)he doesn’t say anything” or “(S)he scoffs” and “(s)he shrugs,” etc. because i’m looking for a specific like, rhythm(?) in a conversation or in the prose and shove in those mannerisms like placeholders. I haven’t figured out a better way to handle that problem with my writing yet, but hopefully will one day. 

Frank’s a weirdly expressive character, at least the way Jon Bernthal plays him, so I tend to kind of add in like, exaggerated exasperation. He has a lot of looking heavenward for strength, side-eyeing, that kind of thing.

Matt and Peter very purposefully have some parallels across my projects, but especially the Matt  and peter in pottery shards. it’s this kind of impatient way of downplaying concern for them. I think that all narrators are inherently unreliable, is the thing. It’s all going to be framed through their mindsets and experiences. Matt and Peter are both deeply isolated characters who don’t know how to comprehend--let alone accept--help and concern, for different reasons. Matt’s used to systemic abuse and instability. He’s used to him having problems being treated as him having done something wrong and being punished for it. So there’s usually a scene with a character showing some pretty appropriate concern for him--Brett, Foggy, Karen, etc.--and Matt’s entire internal monologue is about how endless this conversation is and how he doesn’t know why they’re reacting like this, and the thing they’re reacting to is like, horrible abuse. 

Peter has the same thing, because Peter in pottery shards is someone who enters the narrative as someone who has purposefully isolated himself and set himself into the mindset that people trying to interfere in his life--aka help him, the fourteen year old--is just going to hurt both himself and the people he loves. And there’s a lot of reasons for this, not all of which has been unpacked yet, but it’s resulted in this same mindset that Matt has as perceiving concern as something that’s at best a waste of his time and at worst a big problem he has to fix. So you have scenes where Curtis is actively providing him health care, or teachers are concerned about his wellbeing, and his entire internal monologue is either frustrated musings on how to get out of this, or perceiving it as them being upset with him. 

Foggy and karen haven’t gotten to the brunt of their roles yet in any of the projects, but I usually try to model them around these same internal baseline characteristics that results in repeated mannerisms. Foggy is someone who is usually very purposeful in how he acts and the words he uses. like, he’s really more self aware than any other character, and he’s good at teasing through the maladaptations of other characters. So foggy gets these repeat lines of verbal clarifications like “This isn’t a fight” because he’s good at clocking what exactly is wrong with another character and trying to make his own actions clear. I’ll refrain from karen because most of her repeated baseline characteristics haven’t popped up yet. 

18: Recommend someone else fic! (And tag them if they have a tumblr!)

i don’t think this author has a tumblr, and I haven’t seen anything from the in years, but silverpard on both AO3 and fanfiction.net has this one fic that changed the chemistry of my brain. it’s called a mirror, darkly and it influenced my own writing to a ridiculous degree. i’m not much of one for batman, never got into DC, but it’s very much worth it. 

#fanfic ask games #that's surprisingly not all of my defridging the castles fics #i don't know why i care so much about hte castles #why am i obsessed with them

[oceandeviancy]

Breathing Blue (BadBoyHalo x Male Reader)

Title: Breathing Blue

Pairing: BadBoyHalo x Male Reader

Originally Posted: Wattpad, 2019

Scenario: You celebrate his birthday for the first time in person by making him a gift

---

Waking up from a deep sleep, I realized what day it was. I didn't forget but sometimes my headaches in the morning make me forget things. I was always very awkward around him. I was still not used to being able to express myself in front of someone, let alone in a relationship.

It was the first year I was able to celebrate Darryl's birthday with him rather than online through DMs and Twitter posts. Actions speak louder than words after all. We planned on spending the morning together and the afternoon was for spending time and celebrating with friends.

He didn't want to make a huge thing but I think he wants the attention but because of YouTube, it's hard for him to take it seriously. Darryl can become afraid of his friends trying to troll him or meme around and at this point, he expects it. Well, not from me because I'm sympathetic and care a lot what he thinks.

It wouldn't be a healthy relationship if I didn't show I cared and respected what he wants. He's not fully out with being bisexual on YouTube. He knows his community and they'll accept it but he'd rather have all of BBH/Skeppy be where it is rather than fuel it even more. He's already a little weirded out by all the fan fiction and fan art made of him and his best friend.

I'm still very tired because I stayed up late working on personal projects and watching videos but I know it wasn't the day to sleep until 11:30. I pull myself out of bed and quickly let my headache fade and look through my closet and drawers for something nice and find some clean things that were recently washed.

We didn't officially live together because there is a possibility of a break up and I'd rather wait until at least a year or so of dating for him to come to my place. He stays over at my house half the time because we're both committed in that way. I feel guilty about thinking about marriage but who knows if we'll last that long.

I almost tripped on my carpet but caught myself on the door, gladly not hitting my head. It did not hurt as much as the time I tripped up the stairs when I got super hyper during a livestream of mine.

I could hear Darryl yelling as loudly as his could and I quickly went down the stairs to the living room where he was on the phone with a pizza box in his hands.

"OH MY GOODNESS SKEPPY! THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANTED FROM YOU FOR MY BIRTHDAY" he groaned and half threw the pizza box on the table.

Based on the box and what Darryl was yelling, Zak must have bought him a thin crust pizza and started trolling him while streaming. I checked my phone and sure enough, it said "Skeppy is streaming".

"It's kind of a funny birthday gift, I think" I say to him, lifting up the box and sure enough, it was thin crust.

Darryl was clearly annoyed, "Okay I'm just going to go. I'm not going to let a muffin like you ruin my morning"

"OKAY LOVE YOU BYE!" Zak yelled before hanging up.

Although I don't want to troll or mess with him today, I couldn't miss the opportunity to say something based off of what Zak had said.

"Oh?" I raise my eyebrow, "He's your muffin now?"

He glares at me for a second but then smiles, "Really (Y/N)? You know I call everyone muffin."

Darryl pulled me in for a hug and I rested my chin on his shoulder, still looking at the pizza box because it's funny.

"You're my true muffin because you're so adorable"

I blush and smile and boop him on the nose. He turns pink as well and does an awkward smile. He's adorable when he does that smile and blushing. I like being able to make him happy.

We had to leave around 2:15 to hang out with the rest of our friends and I wanted to show him one of the projects I worked on for him.

I go a closet by the stairs and pull out a wrapped gift box. He sits patiently in one of his favorite chairs of mine and tries not to look eager of what I had made him.

He opened it and was confused when he saw black and red fabric. Darryl pulled it out of the box and realized it was a jacket. It wasn't just any jacket. It was one I had made based off on his Minecraft skin.

He hesitated with his response.

"Oh my goodness (Y/N). It's amazing! Thank you so much! You made this yourself?"

Daryl almost threw it across the room because he was so excited. He quickly got up and threw his arms around me giving me a big hug. I turn even more pink than before.

For awhile now, I've spent my spare time taking pieces of fabric and sewing them onto a jacket I altered to fit the BadBoyHalo style. I thought it would be a cool gift to represent how cool he is and how far he's come on YouTube.

A couple times Darryl caught me working on it so I've come up with weird excuses and reasons for what I was doing. I wanted to make it a surprise.

"I'm glad you like it! It took awhile to get the detailing right and I kept making mistakes"

He kissed my cheek and I'm surprised because he never showed affection more than a hug. He's so cute and I love him. He doesn't deserve getting spammed with all the memes and being trolled every second of the day.

#badboyhalo #bbh #badboyhalo x male reader #bbh x male reader #mcyt #mcyt x male reader #bisexual bbh #bisexual badboyhalo #x male reader #i am still very new at tumblr plz leave me alone #this fic is old so of course its bad

[xinallia-the-galactic-unicorn]

ROLE-PLAY REQUEST:

Heyo~! My name’s Lailani and I’m a 21 year old nerd looking for a fellow 18+ nerd to rp with! I’ve been writing for 9 years, rping for 7- so, I know my way around. I’m also in my fair share of fandoms/have a wide variety of media I’m interested in. Mostly anime/video game oriented. But, my current hyper-fixation is FNAF Security Breach. Which is what I am sending out this request for, primarily.

WHO I AM/WHAT I DO:

As I said- I am 21, so absolutely NO minors.

I am someone who identifies as female and am comfortable with a variety of mature themes/NSFW content including all but SUPER weird or fucked up shit. For example:

Sexual assault/r*pe scenes (though I am totally open to stories utilizing characters that deal with past trauma of all kinds)

Overtly weird fetishes (primarily anything involving stuff like spit, defection, golden rain, but not limited to these)

Anything sex or hard drug related involving minors (just, like- no. We don’t need that)

Honestly- other than that, we’re adults. We can write adult themes if they fit the narrative.

Speaking of- my rps tend to be a bit of everything. Fluff, angst, whatever mix of genre there just so happens to be in the story in question. Though I will say that if angst is had, comfort/fluff must follow. I’m all for putting our characters through the wringer a couple times so long as they get their happy ending/some reprieve.

One thing that is almost (pretty much) always featured though is ships- I love ships, and usually go canon x oc double up. I write your character’s partner you write my character’s partner. I’m comfortable with:

MxF

MxM

FxF (though I will admit I am unused to writing this kind of ship)

NBxWhomever/what-have-you

Canon x OC

Canon x Canon

OC x OC (so long as a clear chemistry/rapport gets established. Admittedly I don’t write these sorts of pairings often either)

To what fandoms does this criteria pertain to? As of right now:

FNAF Security Breach

Undertale

Deltarune

TMNT (mostly 2k12, that’s the one I grew up with. But honestly I’ve been thinking about getting into ROTMNT so if anyone feels like educating me please do XD)

Hazbin Hotel

Helluva Boss

Haikyuu!!

BNHA/MHA

AUs of any of these properties can most definitely apply

What I tend to love most about these properties are the characters. So I’m honestly down for pretty much whatever so long as we make it fun and keep them in character.

I’m pretty flexible in terms of platforms for rp, I know a lot of people really love Discord- and I’m totally cool to use it if that’s what you like, but I personally find the character limit restricting/just a touch annoying to navigate. Mostly I use Messenger- honestly. But, again- I’m flexible. So just let me know! ^^

WHAT I EXPECT:

I am looking for a long-term partner who is ACTIVE. We are people, we have lives, so I fully understand being unable to go 24/7. But I want someone who can handle a solid back-and-forth more than once or twice a week. I’m looking for consistency. Rping is a primary hobby of mine, I love writing/sharing that writing with another person. As such, I make time for it daily. Responses here and there throughout the day are common practice for me. If you send me a reply continuing the story, I will make the time to respond that day- usually sooner rather than later. Though nowadays those more solid back-and-forths are concentrated into the evenings, I want someone with a similar passion that is willing to pick it up for at least one solid back-and-forth more days than not.

If you are gonna be gone for an extended period of time, a small heads up would be very much appreciated though isn’t at all necessary. I also would appreciate a simple ‘I am no longer interested’ if ever you fall out of favor with our partnership and see no reason to continue. I have been ghosted before and it hasn’t ever felt good- especially when it relates to a story I was SUPER excited to write at the time. It may bite for a bit, but I can promise you I’d be able to get over it. We’d be all good 😂.

Strict length requirements- for me, aren’t really fair. Sometimes certain scenes just, don’t need much said. Especially if it’s between two characters exclusively. Quantity of words is hardly an indicator of their quality. What that said, though- I DO consider myself a semi-lit to lit rper, and expect the same of my partner. If you want me to make use of what I’m given- I gotta be given enough. This doesn’t mean to agonize over a 3 page reply for hours on end, AT ALL- but it does mean to put some meat on them bones, you know? You can see my page or PM me for examples.

As a small note- please make sure that the meat on said bones is legible in terms of grammar/spelling all that. I’m not an English teacher by any stretch at all- like I don’t need perfect punctuation or anything. But I would at least expect full sentences and good spelling.

I’m also looking for someone who’s open to talking headcanons, experimenting, just, having fun. Getting out there; getting creative. Even if it isn’t directly in the rp and takes place OOC. Like, I’m not even going to lie to you- some of my current headcanons/concepts I love for the Daycare Attendant have been lifted from The Sun and Moon show. Like, now I love the idea of the two of them being brothers and find the concept of Eclipse extremely interesting- I also really love what artists like Shandzii and Animasup did with them. I’m looking for someone who’s just open to geeking out about and speculating on the characters we write, because it’s fun! Part of what I love to do in rp is add my own special little spice to a character interpretation, so don’t be afraid to do the same and just- share! I’m all for just, geeking out here and there too- trust me, I can go on for a while 😂

Having a clear plan/trajectory for plot and characters also helps a lot for me. Like, it helps to know what you want- so that I can give it to you. And I would do the same on my end, to make it easier for you. On a smuttier note (because that is a thing I am comfortable with/willing to write), we are adults, we can and should feel comfortable having open conversation about what our interests are for those scenes- should they come up. If you have interests/desires/stuff that you like- we can talk about it! There’s absolutely nothing wrong with clear communication.

Another thing of great importance to me is that my partner has the ability to write more than just one or two characters, canon included. If I’m going to rp with someone, I am looking to have a roughly 50/50 split between who writes which members of our given ‘cast’. It’s no fun when one person shoulders 80% of the narrative and interaction responsibility, much less when that someone is you (speaking from experience).

This further feeds into the idea of ensuring that exchanges are equivalent. Meaning that if I put the time and effort into a scene or stuff revolving around your characters/ideas etc. exclusively, I expect the same to be done for me. There have been occasions where someone is on-point with replies when it comes to stuff exclusively focused on THEIR character, but the minute it shifts focus to mine they suddenly drop off/take way longer inbetween replies and the momentum screeches to a halt. That, isn’t fair. This is a team effort here, there has to be a give and take. Of course the stuff involving your character would hypothetically matter more to you, but in my mind- a rp where you only care about one member of your cast and not the group/story as a whole isn’t a very good one. It should be fun/engaging no matter who the focus is on.

And, really- at the end of the day that’s what rp is about for me. Having fun sharing in a great story and characters with someone else. Having them go on adventures/go through developments and grow- it’s fun. Roleplay should be a fun, de-stressing sort of experience. Unless the scene in question is tense. If you find it to be a chore- then please, open up and talk with me about it. Because my goal is to make sure that both of us are having fun with what we’re doing- otherwise we won’t wanna keep doing it!

(Bonus: Pet-peeve) - I only have one pet peeve when it comes to rp. And that’s when someone writes a response, sends it, I reply, and their character responds with “I wasn’t finished talking.”

Unless you indicate some form of opportunity for interruption in the character’s dialogue using something like a hyphen, I will be operating under the assumption that the character has said their full piece and that thus I can respond with mine. Please, please, PLEASE do not negate what my character says with the “I wasn’t finished” line if you make it seem as though your character is, in fact, finished.

TL;DR:

If you’re an 18+ y.o. nerd actively looking to rp FNAF SB (or any of the other properties I listed above) with someone who’s got experience in/loves character interpretation and storytelling, or just wanna fangirl/human about stupid shit regarding the properties in question as a nerd friend (because I need nerd friends, tbh)? Hmu either in the comments or in PM, I’d love to chat!

If you’re contacting me for RP please be sure and include:

Your age

The characters you would like to play (I personally would like to play Moon)

What it is you’d like the rp to be about. I have my own ideas of course- but I wanna see what the two of us can create together!

Thanks so much!

#fnaf moon #fnaf daycare attendant #fnaf security breach #fnaf rp #longterm #oc rp #mature rp #discord rp #new rp #need friends #18+ age range #montgomery gator #fnaf glamrock freddy #fnaf sun #fnaf monty #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu!! #multimuse rp #mha rp discord #hazbin hotel #hazbin rp #roxy wolf #fnaf roxxane #angst with a happy ending #fandom rp #1x1 plot #1x1 rp search #tmnt 2012 #tmnt 2k12

[i-am-trying-my-best-okay]

So I was peer pressured into reading Dune, and this had the unfortunate side effect of me hyper fixating on two unimportant characters, causing me to be more invested in an imaginary plot line I created in my head.

So here I am.

The Harkonnen brothers don’t have a single conversation with each other in the book, and that’s sort of disappointing, but maybe that says something about how the Baron wanted to separate the brothers for his own personal vendetta. But here’s the thing about Rabban; it’s said in the book that he’s nothing but a sadistic brute, but I don’t think that’s actually true. For the one scene Rabban actually has, and not just a footnote of what he’s doing, the Baron is trying to trick Rabban into having a downfall, Rabban keeps asking all these insightful questions and it’s frustrating the Baron. In fact, throughout this entire scene, Rabban seems like he just doesn’t want to be there, that he has no interest in whatever political mind games the Baron is doing and just wants to go about his day. I think Rabban is much more intelligent than people give him credit for, I just think he has no ambition and just wants to do whatever he wants without being bothered. Is whatever he wants sadistic and violent? Maybe, but we never truly get his perspective on that, so much about him can be left up for interpretation. 

As for his younger brother, Feyd, he’s all ambition, in fact maybe that’s partly why Rabban stays away from politics; he doesn’t want to get in his brother’s way. Maybe Rabban secretly helps Feyd in the background, whose to say. Also, can we talk about how Feyd was basically raised by an actual pedophile? That probably adds a whole other layer on Feyd wanting to replace the Baron in terms of power. I was kind of hoping that in the book Feyd would kill the Baron and take that political power he’s always wanted himself, but he didn’t. Also, I think that Harkonnen brothers should have interacted with Paul more. The only time they talk is when Paul and Feyd are in that duel to the death thing, and they had such good chemistry. Like, Feyd was just trying to chat it up while fighting to the death, and Paul was just practically silent, it was fun. Imagine if they had met earlier, had a whole rival thing going on.

I think it has great AU potential if it was discovered that Paul was a Harkonnen when he was a child, and the two houses had to deal with that. The families could maybe use the chance to get close to one another under the guise of merging their families, all while both sides plot to destroy the other. At this time the Harkonnen’s are in running Dune, so the Atreides’ come to live with them there, all while plotting the other’s downfall. Paul and his new cousins on the other hand, form an actual bond that is very annoying for everyone involved. The three of them didn’t expect of bond of course; Feyd was planning to fake niceties and then crush Paul, Rabban was ready to be his brother’s muscle/self preservation, (also, apparently Rabban is much older then the other two, but for the sake of this AU I’m going to make him just a couple years older) and Paul was hoping to avoid his two weird cousins at all cost. Whenever the Harkonnen brothers would approach Paul at first he would probably just jump out the nearest window or something. But, through a series of misadventures, the three end up spending time together and are horrified to find out they actually like each other, something they each furiously deny when asked. But they end up doing everything together, and are complete menaces about it. They were so wrapped up in this strange new family bond, that when the two families made their attack on each other they were taken off guard. In the chaos, Paul ends up getting lost to the desert. Now, at this point, I think Paul is still a child, maybe like 10 years old or something, and completely alone in Dune of all places to fend for himself. 

This probably warps Paul’s personality over the years as he struggles to survive on his own, learning for himself the ways of the desert, now entering Paul’s feral era where he is practically one with the desert and bites people. Back with the Harkonnen’s, they were the side that won but the brothers still miss their quiet cousin. So they play their parts, for now, and then one day, with Paul being 17 now, Rabban was out slaughtering people, as you do, when he finds Paul again, who is currently single handedly bringing down his men. So the two reunite and it’s a good time, and they sneak Paul into their house to Feyd, who is also overjoyed to see Paul again. They get to talking, and I have this theory while reading the books that Paul doesn’t seem to care about doing what’s right or having power or anything; he just wanted security for the people he cared about. So when Feyd reveals his plans about wanting to be emperor, Paul is onboard, using his own powers as a Mentat and his new found knowledge of the desert to help. So then the book continues with it’s political power struggles, our trio secretly scheming against the Baron’s schemes, making sure Paul isn’t found out, some catching up and family bonding times, Rabban trying to be the voice of sanity as the other two were teetering on the edge with theirs in different ways, it’s a fun time. And it all comes to ahead when they dethrone the emperor, with Feyd now in charge. It all comes completely out of left field for the emperor and his allies, since the three pulled some next level mind games. So the three of them wait there, waiting for the Baron to come in with Feyd lounging on the throne and the other two standing on each side of him. The Baron is slightly pissed for sure, and Feyd challenges the Baron to a duel. After some taunting on both ends, Feyd wins, and the three of them go on their slightly co-dependent ways, ruling over the galaxy for better or worse (Probably worse).

#dune #frank herbert #paul atreides #glossu rabban #feyd rautha #feyd rautha harkonnen #baron harkonnen #vladimir harkonnen #i just think they would be a fun trio

[davyjoneslockr]

Ohh I wonder what you say about Giorno :0

I have So Many Thoughts about him and none of them are coherent let's go

favorite thing about them: Moral ambiguity in a main protagonist is always very cool and epic. I like that he's so thoroughly a combination of his dads, like he's a gentleman who aspires to make his country safer for kids, but he also. Y'know. Murders people a lot and doesn't bat an eye if it's for a greater cause. Very Machiavellian for a 15 year old lol. He's also just super weird and I really like that. My boy literally went to meet with Polpo and was like "yeah my only skill is I can put my entire ear into my head. watch this" and then proceeded to kill him. "Ohhh instead of stealing one car, I'm gonna ruin a hundred peoples' days by turning all these cars into frogs." "Yeah I'm gonna drive the car into a large body of water to escape an enemy who turns everything into ice. This is a good and sound decision." Literally impeccable

least favorite thing about them: Okay so maybe this will come as a surprise. But based on Vento Aureo alone, he is my least favorite JoJo by far. I found him really boring and overshadowed by the rest of the cast, mainly because he rarely had a real struggle. Like, in nearly every fight, I had no doubts that Giorno was going to sweep in and kill the enemy easily. Everyone in the main cast was constantly singing his praises except for Abbacchio, and even his disdain was clearly out of his own insecurities rather than actually disliking him. And like, even by JJBA standards, he just seemed a liiiittle too overpowered in general without much to balance it out. I think it's cool that he's essentially a catalyst for everyone else's lives to get overturned and for them to change as people, but at times, he really seemed like no more than a narrative device. It wasn't until I read PHF and started writing my own Vento Aureo fics that I started liking him and developing him as a character in my brain and now I can't stop thinking about him help

favorite line: Everything he says in the Solider in Love chapter in PHF. Holy shit. Everything from the stupid chicken rant to the "half a step" speech is just so interesting, and (to me at least) it all feels so deliberate characterization-wise. Like, Giorno in the PHF-verse is kind of a terrible person at times, and a lot of it has to do with him being so closed-off from everyone as a coping mechanism, but him being just like. A little silly and awkward with Fugo by complaining about chicken (and then proceeding to stuff his face with it, which is also just supremely funny), and admitting that he's grieving too, and offering to share in that grief with him, essentially prompting both of them to turn a new leaf together, etc etc I love it so much.

brOTP: Him and Mista. I love their platonic dynamic so much, even in canon/PHF timeline where they have a falling out, because that dynamic is still super super interesting to me. Just. Mista taking him under his wing and becoming the first genuine friend Giorno's ever had, Giorno looking up to him for guidance because, even though he's hyper-competent and definitely has his shit together more than Mista does, he's still an awkward teenage boy who's never really had any kind of social outlet, and he thinks Mista is cool in the way a kid thinks their older sibling is. Giorno goes to him for advice on talking to his crush and making new friends, and Mista takes him out to do silly teenager things he never got to try, and idk. Their friendship is so fun. And when shit goes down in canon and Mista hates him, I still think that a part of Giorno still looks up to him, and one of his biggest regrets is how he treated Mista because of his own inclinations to push away any potential bonds in the fear of being abandoned. Anyhow

OTP: Fugio!! Talked about them a lot already on my Fugo post, but. Man. From Giorno's end, I like to think that his feelings sort of stemmed from Fugo completely overturning his whole worldview just by existing. Like, Giorno has gone his whole life believing that suppressing emotions makes him strong and will keep him safe, and then in walks Hyper-Emotional Pannacotta Fugo and his Feelings-Based Killing Machine and he's like. What the fuck. How does he just. What. And cue Giorno Giovanna's extreme distress over this walking contradiction who can feel things and gains power through emotions and has just torn everything he believed to shreds and now he won't leave his brain what is happening??? (It's okay he just has a crush but he's really dramatic about it.) Also Fugo is a massive simp but Giorno is, too, he's just more subtle about it. 1000% he writes melodramatic love poems for him and decorates them with pressed flowers and sprays them with perfume and the whole time he's like. "Love my pathetic emo bf so very very much :) <333"

nOTP: Uhhh Giomis and that's all I'm gonna say on the matter. Also stuff like Brugio/Abbagio/whatever obviously.

random headcanon: When he was a kid, his mom and stepdad sort of left him to fend for himself, so he got really good at making like. Kraft mac and cheese and kid cuisines. On the other hand, he can't cook a meal from scratch to save his life. He has like no idea how the individual ingredients work, so, if left to his own devices, he just makes horrible 50s housewife jello salad type meals. He's definitely tried making alfredo sauce with melted ice cream because "ice cream is just frozen cream, isn't it? By that logic, I can melt it, and it should work." It did not. He was banned from cooking in the Bucci Gang house after that.

unpopular opinion: The fandom does him dirty just as much as Kakyoin. Seriously, I know I'm not the best Giorno writer either, but some of the stuff I've seen on AO3 is just. Yeah. Stop writing him as a sex object please thanks <3

song i associate with them: Flowers Never Bend With the Rainfall by Simon and Garfunkel is more or less how I like characterizing him. I also have a little playlist for him here.

favorite picture of them: Classic image but he looks so very cool :]

#giorno is my least favorite jojo!!1! #proceeds to write a whole ass essay about him #jjba #giorno giovanna