#i did not necessarily intend to say c

[lunarsummerei]

personally think one of my fave things is how much seb initially appeared to dislike both max and charles when they joined the grid when they are both literally just different parts of his personality reincarnated

#like #max is the red bull golden boy youngest ever driver winning wdcs here there and everywhere #and charles doesnt even need explaining like #on a mildly offtopic note #charles next time ferrari give you a shit team order channel your inner seb we know you have him and pull a i was racing i was faster #i passed him i won #pls #we need it #you need it #hell seb probably needs it #sebchal #sebastian vettel #charles leclerc #max verstappen #sebmax? #maxstien #? #coming back to say #i did not necessarily intend to say c

[bethsturn]

Could you please write or do one of those texting fics where reader is finally done with toxic chris and moves on to someone new that really loves her and he realizes he fucked up and tries to make it up to her?

if my wishes came true

chris sturniolo x fem!oc

texts and writing

warnings: none i can think of:)

part 2 to these specific texts:))

no way she knows how to actually write, a shock to all x

lowercase intended!

also i’m so sorry but writing y/n stuff is sooo much harder for me idk why and i kinda have like ox’s i use for chris and matt? i hope that’s okay:)

anastasia’s pov:

i knew deep down that everything was for the better. i was happy now, me and ryland, my new boyfriend. chris wasn’t in the picture anymore, he hasn’t been for about a 4 months now and for the past 2 i have been with ryland, there was no more toxicity. no more other girls. just us.

ryland knew about chris due to an argument that occurred between nathan and i over the old “romance” of me and chris, but nate didn’t know much. when i explained everything to him he had swore to never act in the same disrespectful manner as chris, and i truly have never appreciated anything more.

i really was starting to love him, i thought about it constantly trying not to rush into anything. i knew i wanted it to work and that i wanted it to last but all in all, he wasn’t chris.

i was alone in the house, nathan was with the triplets, staying overnight which i couldn’t necessarily do anymore, regardless as to how much i missed it, how much i missed us all together, how much i missed staying over, how much i missed nick and matt. how much i missed chris. ryland wasn’t chris.

binge watching a new shitty tv show my phone lit up and i chose to ignore it, assuming it was just nate talking shit as usual, until it lit up again.

it wasn’t nate.

the first time in 4 months. 4 months since the end and he had finally reached out, i wasn’t waiting for it, i was just wondering when it would happen. but i knew i couldn’t reply, or i shouldn’t reply. but ryland wouldn’t mind, he isn’t like that as far as i am aware, but did i even want to speak to him.

tears flooded my eyes and i knew i shouldn’t have responded the second i did.

chris’ pov:

i left the house as quick as i possibly could, i couldn’t stay there with nathan and my brothers, it was like a piece of her. it’s like she’s dead and i’m haunted by any memory as if it wasn’t my fault in the first place.

i knew i had to make it right i just don’t know how, i knew i loved her i just don’t know how to say it so that she knows i really mean it.

i found myself at her door, just like all those times before. i wasn’t sure how i got here but all the roads just led me here. a bouquet of baby breath flowers in one hand, my other anxiously shaking as i built up the courage to knock.

anastasia’s pov:

as i hear a knock at the door i was quick to wipe my eyes and climb out of my bed, i wasn’t expecting anyone and i knew it wouldn’t be for nate as he would’ve told whoever it was that he wasn’t home.

i open the door without a second thought but im hit with almost instant regret. “ana plea-” i shake my head, it’s all i can do, the tears immediately coming back to my eyes. “no chris, i told you i can’t cope with this and i meant it, this isn’t fair anymore” my hands shook and the tears didn’t even try to hold themselves back. his arm extends and i look down at the flowers in his hand, my favourite ones. “chris i can’t take them, please go home” i was pleading with him at this point, he has been here for all of 2 minutes and i already need him to be gone again.

“don’t cry ana please, i needed to come here, i needed to give you these and i needed to tell you everything” he was stuttering and his hands were shaking as he spoke, i said nothing, just stared waiting for him to continue. “i acted the way i did because i was scared stassie, i was scared you would leave and it sounds awful i know i really do but i was terrified that if i had committed to you then you would up and leave, it’s stupid and it seems like an excuse but you made me nervous ana. you still do. i really love you and i have for as long as i can remember. i loved you before i knew you as my best friends sister, i loved you before i knew you as nicks new bestfriend. i just need you to hear me right now ana.” he takes a breath and looks into my eyes with hope.

genuine writing actually scares me and i kinda hate this and might delete it icl. but i hope this is okay🤍 i really do like writing it’s just people expectations:)

#sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo smut #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo edit #sturniolo fanfic #inbox #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo #sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo #nathan doe smut #nathan doe #nate doe smut #nate doe

[fancyfade]

i have a question, as i am also a big enjoyer of damian wayne and have been spinning around the concept of an arc/issue/solo for him and i like to hear people's thoughts an ideas: if you could right a solo, or an issue of detective comics starring damian wayne, what would right, because GOD, DC needs to give him to someone who'll actually do something with him.

hmmmm I think a good follow-up to Robin: Son of Batman, which focuses a lot on Damian trying to redeem/"redeem" himself for what he did in the League of Shadows, would be an arc where the idea that he was fully responsible is challenged.

(I don't necessarily think he has to agree with it, I think lots of batfam members have insane senses of responsibility and if they immediately all went like 'yeah you're right this isn't something I could stop' it would get boring. I just would like to see it challenged by the text, like babs tells cass that she wasn't at fault for killing someone as an eight year old in batgirl. Before cass goes to fight shiva to the death in a battle she does not intend on winning b/c she won't kill again XD)

anyway so with that in mind. i think talia should be involved. I know I'm so insanely mad whenever I see this panel (link) b/c Talia's being asked to apologize and redeem herself for something that wasn't even in character (and i followed up: Bruce can act OOC and get it swept under the rug or justified he doesn't have to apologize for it (link).) ANYWAY but thats besides the point the point is I'm imagining Talia hearing Damian say like "we all must pay, mother." and I think she'd be like "who tf even told you that????" and she'd be a good second point of view in this arc, challenging Damian's ideas that he needs to actively redeem himself or he was a bad person earlier, because while Damian just sees what he did vs what he's doing now, she sees him as her child.

I also went kind of on about this when reading Knight Terrors (link) but I think it would be deeply discomforting for Damian to contemplate the idea that he wasn't in responsible for what he did in the League, because the way he deals with it is ok wait i'll just quote that post:

I think if he followed these thoughts (that his training is something that was 'done' to him) further, it would scare him, because the way he currently copes with it and views the world in general is by everything being his fault and his responsibility - in his control. If he admits or acknowledges that he was just a kid being raised a certain way, it’s not in his control, it’s not something he can redeem himself from, and it falls outside his current way he views the world.

anyway that said that's what like. the general 'next step' of Damian's arc I'd have i think would be neat.

I'd also be down with like. literally just fun adventures, like I wouldn't even hate Damian in high school and solving low-stakes crimes like we have in batman and robin 2023 if it wasn't written so blandly

#regulus ready to scream #ask #dc comics #damian wayne #robin

[ihopesocomic]

As it was known that Jasper made a deal with Edge, to give his daughter to Edge to mate his son to have a better and proper heir to the pride.

But why? Could Edge find some others that are not in the Grove? What were Jasper's thoughts and intentions when killing Merry if he wanted to make a deal with Edge to give him one of his heirs to mate with his son? They're right to say that Jasoer not only isn't a good king but also not a good father. He was looking after himself and he wanted his pride to follow his rule when it came to survival.

Edge never intended for Adamant and Fade to have kids. It's purely a business partnership, with Face being the "face" of his father's enterprise and Adamant looking out for him and being the enforcer of his rule. If the pair of them wish to have their own mates outside of the partnership, that's whatever as far as Edge is concerned.

As for your question as to why Adamant has been chosen specifically, I can give one non-spoiler reason: the Golden Grove is the smallest pride under Edge's rule so they're naturally the first choice to surrender an Heir because anywhere else makes Edge's monthly payment tariff via food and so on.

There's another reason but it's spoilers. c:

But she certainly wasn't chosen before she was born. That decision wasn't made until after he saw her hunt in Chapter 5. He was still weighing his options before then. But yeah, co-rulers are not always necessarily romantically involved and they do not always have kids. Some don't even assume the title of King or Queen alongside their mate at all. Opal, for example, is not officially a King of the Thundering Mountains despite being Obsidian's mate because he feels the title doesn't suit him. He's still just referred to as a Jester.

Even without kids, the future of the pride is always ensured through the Knight. If the ruling body happens to die without Heirs or Heirs that are not old enough to rule, the Knight will always ascend to the throne. Like Obsidian did when Pyrite and Flint (Diamond's parents) died suddenly.

It's why we always object to the Queen title being viewed as on par with the deputy position in Warrior Cats. Nope, the "deputy" or second-in-command of the pride is always the Knight.

Sorry, this answer got a bit long-winded. I do think I need to try and cover this somehow somewhere in the comic but it's finding that spot to do it in. oof - RJ

#ask #ask us stuff #fade #adamant #edge's kingdom #golden grove #worldbuilding #rj answers

[onewholivesinloops]

knowing that rena was diagnosed with ptsd because of the trauma of her parents' divorce, i think it's a fair assumption to make that satoko's ptsd started with her mother's multiple relationships with men and constant remarrying. this already disrupted her sense of self and identity. the abuse and ostracization by the community against her for being a houjou amplified the symptoms and hinamizawa syndrome worsened the effects (which led to her pushing her parents off the cliff, rip), and then her ptsd was hyper-intensified to c-ptsd levels by her aunt and uncle's abuse and the loss of her brother.

when satoko was 'cured' of the virus, i think to rika it was as though the root of her trauma was 'cured'. rika always desperately wanted to save satoko from her trauma, her abuse, her uncle, her aunt, the virus. this is why once satoko was out of those, she believed that as long as satoko remained with her she should be safe.

it's why she can easily not notice the way satoko is suffering at st. lucia. for rika, this is a place Without All The Suffering that was present in hinamizawa, it's a place for a new future, and a new start. this makes rika underestimate the potential of the pain it can cause for satoko.

in rika's mind, there's no longer anything she needs to "save" satoko from in st. lucia, because none of the stressors and factors in hinamizawa that were responsible for satoko's torment are supposedly present here and there's also nothing rika herself needs to be "saved" from.

(because satoko's suffering has always been the certain reality that rika will also suffer, as the rare fragments where teppei comes back and takes satoko away are the worst of worst fragments for rika. she loves her too much so she sees their suffering as one. satoko's abuse was also rika's pain. one of rika's flaws is that as a victim and survivor she always centers herself and her own pain, even when it concerns others. this isn't necessarily a bad thing because at some points you do need to prioritize your well-being over everything else, but rika doesn't realize how far she takes it sometimes).

another part of it is rika conflating everything about satoko's trauma and mental illness with hinamizawa syndrome. there's a critique of the original here. hinamizawa syndrome in the original is a "mental illness/circumstances that lead to a tragedy" allegory, and it works for what it's intended for, but it's also a double edged sword - many people ended up using it to deny the characters' complicity in their crimes. "oh it was all the syndrome" and they ignored the fact that it's a metaphor. the characters being forgiven after committing murders wasn't because they were mind controlled by a disease. it's symbolic of being forgiven for the circumstances that led to this tragedy - an acknowledgement of that. the characters still have an internal logic unique to them informed by their experiences and struggles even when they're infected with it.

ryukishi explains it better than i ever could here:

so it's interesting that gou satokowashi starts with 'curing' it for satoko - satoko is 'cured' of the mental illness allegory. it's taking this allegory to its natural conclusion.

you can even see the flaws of having such a plot device in satoko's reception. some people refuse to try to understand her or sympathize with her because unlike rena or shion or takano etc etc she doesn't have the syndrome. she's lost that card that made it very easy for some to forgive what other characters did in the original.

and rika - being the character in gousotsu who's a mirror for the viewer and their expectations - dismisses what satoko is saying to her in the watanagashi ritual scene even though it's satoko opening up about her deepest pains and traumas, and she's even saying things about the future and previous loops she shouldn't know about unless she's also a looper. rika would rather purposefully look away from all this than acknowledge a reality where satoko could be involved in something like this. a reality where satoko could be this vicious and unforgiving.

and even as far back as their time in st. lucia, rika was ignoring The Signs because satoko no longer had the syndrome or was in that environment. "it's just a foul mood" she said. this means she must be fine, right? wrong. she's absolutely not lmao.

it feels to me like ryukishi's admittance of the flaws in hinamizawa syndrome as a narrative device. it's an admittance that those characters are still mentally ill without it.

you can't just blame the mental illness as some unseen demon or curse or magical virus that takes your loved ones and makes them do bad things but also - as a possible extension of that metaphor - they want to pretend that if they got victims out of that situation that made them paranoid, they would never 'snap' and become 'unsaveably' mentally ill and kill people.

there's also this desperation from rika to get away from hinamizawa and everything that entails. it's why she's proactive in getting kimiyoshi and oryou to 'end the dam war' and 'forgive satoko' even though it's just everyone collectively deciding to go "all's well that ends well" without taking into consideration the ramifications all the shunning might've had on satoko. she's not even afforded an apology. it's like sweeping everything under a rug and rika is complicit in that. rika prefers to tap into the Savior Complex than admit she victimized and was powerless to save satoko from some things even if she managed to stop some others things. she's like utena. duelist rika.

i'm pretty confident in this read because ryukishi lampshades hinamizawa syndrome in umineko which lets go of this narrative device. lambda making fun of battler's theories by going "are you going to speculate about how there's a virus called rokkenjima syndrome causing massive delusions".

i think he's been considering this for a while.

#higurashi #higurashi gou #higurashi sotsu #satoko houjou #rika furude #gamo.txt

[bleue-flora]

...Q running in an election, which he was completely allowed to do, during which he played 100% by Wilbur's rules and won fairly according to said rules, means that getting abused by his boss was his own fault?

Yeah your views are definitely scuffed. You don't have to sympathize with a character you don't like but holy shit

Perhaps fault isn’t the right word. Just to clarify, I didn’t mean it was his fault for being abused, not saying anyone deserves that. So, I didn’t mean like he asked for it or like it is karma or comeuppance for running in the election. And by no means am I saying he was wrong to do so in the first place and whether or not he followed c!Wilbur’s rules is irrelevant. So perhaps comparing that with exile is unfair to c!Quackity, after all c!Tommy did provoke Dream and there’s not necessarily evidence for c!Quackity provoking c!Schlatt into that behavior. But at the end of the day, it is a result of his own actions. It is a consequence of his own actions whether or not it was intended or deserved. He chose to side with c!Schlatt so he could win even though it’s not like c!Schlatt was necessarily hiding his true colors, and he chose to stay. Did he know he was going to be abused, did he chose to be abused, did he deserve being abused. No. Of course not. But it happened because of the choices he made and he could’ve always made different choices to escape that. Actions just have consequences whether good or bad, you pay them or someone else does, whether intentional or not. - I forget an umbrella and I get wet and I get the floor wet and then someone slips on the wet floor and falls - I made a choice or perhaps a series of choices whether to put my umbrella by the door or make sure to dry my shoes off… etc. did I know that was going to happen? Did I intend for that? Did I or the person who fell deserve that? No, I made choices and those were the consequences that happened as a result so one could say it is my fault even if it’s not only my fault and even if it’s not like I intentionally meant for that to happen.

So obviously c!Quackity didn’t deserve to be abused, nor choose it, nor mean for it to happen, nor make it happen, nor is his hurt invalid. But c!Schlatt had a bad reputation to start off with, I mean one of the first things he does is betray c!Wilbur and c!Tommy in the first place. So all I’m saying is c!Quackity chose to ally himself with the devil and the devil lived up to his name.

(And I know I said you can call me cold, but that is kinda accusatory. c!Quackity isn’t a real person, these do not reflect my view irl, this is my view on a sadistic, manipulative, fictional character who lives in a world where people stab, kill, insult, harass for a fun afternoon.)

#obviously schlatt isn’t the actual devil that just figuratively ;) #anyways… I don’t think it’s fair to judge me so harshly #no one bashes people for not sympathizing understanding or liking Loki Dark Vadar Lex Lurther Wilson Fisk …. #everyone has a tragic backstory but it doesn’t give you a pass to by bad nor even a reason #and I don’t see that abuse as being an explanation nor really a turning point of his character since it didn’t really change him #he was already on a dark path sure schlatt may have further his path but he was already on it. #….anyways I think when it comes to talking about Q and now everyone’s talking about Tommy we are running in circles so I almost didn’t #respond at all… but I felt like it was important to defend myself…. #dsmp #dream smp #c!quackity #c!schlatt #dsmp analysis #did someone order an essay? #because I read a psychology paper last night and I have some interesting things to share :)….. #dsmp quackity #cquackity #hello there

[athena-xox]

Hi! I've been wanting to send asks for a while but couldn't think of a good question until recently.

I have three questions (or perhaps I should say headers).

One: How's your rewrite progressing? At what stages is cannon altered? Are there going to be concepts/characters ignored entirely?

Two: I've seen your (humorous) plea for long/multi chapter eah fics what are some of the favorite's you've read already? Any chance you have an idea of your own outside the rewrite? long or short (chances are yes, for literally anyone in this fandom but it bears asking).

Three: What fairytale(s) would you

A: Like to repeat

B: Could functionally thwart if you had to live through it.

C: Die in, or flee the land to avoid at all cost's.

Omg love the questions. I will admit I’m a bit to brain dead to fully comprehend all the questions so if I answer I different question that what you intended feel free to correct me.

With that being said, the first chapter of my rewrite is done and basically fully edited I believe it’s around 6000/7000 words. Chapter two hadn’t been edited but it’s kinda a weird one so it doesn’t really need to be edited and it’s only around 2000 words.

Chapter 3 I’ve written a bit of it and it’s also a short and I have a layout for it. And chapter 4 is going to be on the longer side probably 6000-10000 words. But after those are done and edited hopefully I’ll publish the fic!!

So that’s the progress, for what parts of canon are being altered, I think a lot of characterization. Bunny, Alistair, Crystal, Milton Grimm, Snow White & EQ are all characters who were either portrayed as good or morally grey that I’m going to make evil (whoops spoilers) and then also kitty isn’t really going to have a redemption arc like she did in spring unsprung, she’s just going to continue to chaotically be herself.

And then just every plotline / character will just be slightly more mature and in depth. And it depends on how you see canon because the rewrite is going to be a mix the tv series + the books which vary a bit on canon. And then obviously a lot more queer representation.

I wouldn’t necessarily say that the epic winter arc is being disgraced but it’s going througu many changes. I’ll probably get ride of the whole through the woods concept because it doesn’t really add anything to the plot (although I am adding a musical that doesn’t really do anything for the plot except allow be to geek (theatre kid) out and give us some cute dizzie moments).

I really want to include her but I don’t think there’s going to be any room for Bella sister. Other things from canon that I’m not including is darise, Meeshell being a horrible singer, DARABELLA, Maddie having visions, the snow king, cupids crush on dexter, the revealer rays, probably lots more but I can’t think of them.

Onto the next question I definitely have some fic recs. I’ll probably make a separate post for it but my top 2 are rewrite ignite restart and a legacy of brambles and thorns.

I think the reason why I’m actually commuting to the rewrite is because it’s really the only eah fic I want to write since I plan to hopefully cover all the characters and ships I like. In my past fandoms I’ve had like 20 different fics I wanted to write but I never got a around to all or them.

Oh wait actually I guess I have one idea but I doubt I’ll ever write it since I want to focus on the rewrite. But during my transition stage from the mlb fandom to the eah I was thinking about an au. Either the eah characters with miraculous’s in the real world or mlb characters at ever after. 

Okay and for the last questions im assuming you’re asking which fairytales I’d like to 1. Be a part of 2. Don’t want to be a part of and I could stop it 3. Would have to run away from ?

1. When I was little I had the yearbook thing that had you create your own eah character and I always wanted to be a princess so I made myself goose girl

2. Definitely wouldn’t want to be like Jack in the beanstalk so I just wouldn’t take the beans

3. Sleeping beauty was my fav when I was younger so I definitely wouldn’t want to have Faybelles destiny. Or be an ugly sister, that would kill my self esteem (no wonder Bella and Brutta ran away)

For the last 3 questions I wasn’t sure if you were asking all abt me or if any were for my rewrite.

Anyways tysm for the ask !!

#ever after high #eah #lizzie hearts #apple white #daring charming #raven queen #kitty cheshire #darling charming #Bella sister #eah ask #dizzie #eah rewrite #ever after high rewrite

[c0d33]

Richard Lore

WARNING! This post contains spoilers for Outer Wilds: Echoes of the Eye!

If you have not yet completed this DLC (Or Outer Wilds for that fact), I would suggest not reading past the read more. What I talk about in here will spoil some of the largest parts of the DLC, and they're too good to not experience for yourself first.

Y'all gone? Alright, now let's get into this mess of a character.

Richard the Owlk

(Art by @luckylazulii!)

Part 1: Origins

Richard's origins are probably not a conventional way for OCs to be made. Richard was spawned entirely as a joke from several VRChat sessions I had with some friends. In them, we would usually start in the Outer Wilds avatar world, and one of the avatars was a customizable Owlk! Naturally, I tried to make the silliest looking one possible, so I gave them no antlers (But I prefer just calling them bald). While I used this avatar, I jokingly called them Richard. Not only did this name stick for the character itself, but it also somehow got attached to me. So if you're wondering why I had that random name listed as one of the ones you can call me, that's why.

Part 2: The Lore

This is where it somehow gets sillier. I never intended for Richard to be a serious character, so naturally I just started making up whatever lore I wanted for him. So, here's what the initial lore was:

He's bald (As mentioned earlier)

He's a certified Fortnite gamer

He sleeps in doorways (The one on the top end of the stairs in the Party House in the Shrouded Woodlands is the main one he sleeps in)

He eats children

As you can see, not the most serious OC. But again, I hardly intended for them to be serious. It wasn't until they had been around for a while and I started getting art of them that more lore started developing. So, here's the Serious Lore™:

Richard was spawned through a bug in the simulation's code. Despite the Owlk's best attempts to fix the bug, he was never patched out and remained in the simulation indefinitely.

He didn't act like other Owlks. He would often be looming in the distance, watching. Waiting.

He wasn't very... friendly, so to say. Various reports were made and many stories were told about the various things he had done, but there were never any other witnesses for any one story.

By the time the events of the main game are taking place, there are no other Owlks left in the simulation except for Richard (And the Prisoner, but due to their current situation, Richard couldn't feasibly get rid of them).

And so far, that's the lore. There are some other meta things I could think of that would explain how they would work in the context of the game, but that doesn't necessarily apply to their lore.

Part 3: Personality

I've given a lot of thought about Richard's personality and how it would work with both sides of his lore, and I think I've worked something out.

Richard experiences what I would best describe as very extreme mood swings, due to how messy the bug that allowed him to exist was.

One is the very silly, very goofy Fornite-playing doorway-sleeping Owlk that most people (Aside from the other Owlks) know and love.

The other side is the side that the Owlks experienced, with the general creepiness and violent nature.

My best comparison would be to some kind of mental illness, but I'm very cautious and nervous about saying that since A.) I don't know nearly enough about mental illnesses to name any one that it could be similar to, B.) I don't want to offend anyone who may have the mental illness that I specifically name, and C.) I don't want this to vilify mental illness in any way, shape, or form.

I'm very aware of how bad mental illness representation in media can be, and the last thing I want would be to add to that pile of misrepresentation. I would greatly appreciate any feedback or advice about this, since I'm very worried about portraying something the wrong way.

Part 4: Conclusion

Well, that's the Richard lore! Thank you very much for reading!

Richard is still very much a character that's under development, as I'm still attempting to work out exactly how they act and behave. Any thoughts or comments are appreciated, and feel free to send me asks about them, be it questions or feedback!

(Entirely unrelated to Richard, but after writing this I'm realizing just how starved for lore my other two OCs are. Maybe I should get some for them too.)

#outer wilds #outer wild spoilers #echoes of the eye #echoes of the eye spoilers #oc #original character

[lindszeppelin]

I almost feel bad for some of the Kaustin shippers. So many have done face reveals and/or use their real names/provide other identifying information about themselves.

Like, most are young and in Kaia’s peer group or younger. I was wise beyond my years when I was that age but boy did I get more polished with age. I’m beyond glad there is no internet footprints of most of my thoughts and opinions from that age! I’d say they should know better, but they don’t have the perspective to how much their thoughts on relationships will change as they experience more relationships and witness how other people’s relationships fall apart. It’s the curse of being young: you think you know more than you do. They don’t know that how you feel in your early twenties will not necessarily hold up the rest of your life. That said, I low key feel Mollie should know better. She’s in freakin’ law school and is essentially studying and analyzing consequences at the end of the day. Like…does she think law firms or clients can’t one day come across her blog, tweets, photos (whether they’re still live when she officially enters that profession or on something like screenshots or the way back machine that someone will track down her footprint…which will be fine bc she’s literally teaching her followers how to better stalk Austin via the way back machine 🙄🙄🙄🙄) will find her literal stalking and investing sooooo much time into a relationship between people she’ll never meet cute or professional or even remotely okay? Like how is she not scared that this could be a huge embarrassment and liability to be such a rabid fan who follows several people’s every move? It’s a terrible look professionally.

Like I said, I kinda feel bad bc you don’t know what you don’t know. But they also write fan fiction as they go based on tips of icebergs (largely out of context) and are thinking it’s cool to leave their identifiable information out there. I don’t think I would have done that even at 22 so I cannot wrap my head around it. Sorry- just wanted to vent about this.

Related: I hate it when they say we’re infantilizing Kaia or any young women when we point out age differences aren’t cool. No, we’re 🚨warning🚨 them based on what we’ve learned. Not every older dude is a predator- I don’t think Austin is “ preying” on Kaia. But you hit a few nails on the head some posts back talking about him being a bit lost when he met Kaia. He had just finished some intense projects and was still likely finding himself post his relationship with Vanessa. Yes, it had been 2ish years but a) it was a long ass relationship, b) he wasn’t even living in LA the entire time between relationships and didn’t go home/see his family and c) throw in a global pandemic in there so those 2 years were weird AF. I’m personally of the belief that if an older man is with a younger girl something is a bit off, even if it’s neutral (read: not a bad guy or a predator) but is in a weird place or hasn’t grown into their adult life yet and just has a bit more work to do. I personally think he should have stayed single a bit longer to grow into his adult self. I don’t judge him for going for a younger woman and I semi get it, as I also believe we mentally/emotionally revert back to the relative age we were when a relationship began (post break up). He was so young when he and V got together and was in a serious relationship in his twenties. Of course he’s going to relate to younger people for a hot moment (and that’s not taking away his intelligence or maturity in other ways…this can happen to the best of us). But yeah, he should stayed single and someone should teach Kaia that older men who wanna date young women probably aren’t the best idea for a spectrum of reasons. It’s not infantilizing- it’s a warning, it’s concern, and it’s about being literate about human psychology and behaviors regarding patterns and societal standards that we need to rethink.

Sorry this was longer than I intended. I guess I’ve been wanting to say all of this for some time so it was bottled up. Hope it didn’t come across as a hater- I don’t hate Austin (I’m side eyeing and running out of patience the longer this goes on bc I believe him to be smarter than this, but I still don’t think he’s a bad dude.) As I said, this happens to the best of us and it’s not an attack. Life is messy and dialogues about this stuff are important. And bc we’ve lived it, those young whipper snappers should respect their elders and not gaslight our lived experience/observations/lessons learned 😂

Hello anon! I just wanted to have some dinner and craft a response for you, because damn this was so well put together that it deserves a little more depth of analysis from me. So thank you for taking your time to write in your thoughts.

Off the top, I do agree that the younger generation is way too lax with how they throw around their identifying information out there on social media. A lot of them just aren't aware that whatever you post online leaves a footprint, and even if you try to delete it or conceal it, it will always be there. So even if they think they're being cocky by revealing their faces and leaving their names and where they live and such out there without a care, welp that is gonna come back around and haunt them later. Us millennials (i assume you're a fellow millennial, or Gen X at most lol) know the dangers of the internet as we grew up with the beginnings of social media. I would think twice if i were these kids uploading their faces and other shit to twitter/tumblr. Employers can find all of this even when the shippers don't think they can.

I think when we were these shippers ages we all said some pretty cringe shit online. Here's hope that as these kids grow up they realize the damage they can do by how their words and actions can affect others. And I will also just say here that just because someone goes to college for higher learning doesn't mean they are smarter than anyone else. Book smarts don't equal street smarts. and in this world I highly value being street smart and internet smart over book smart. And i think we all know that not every profession is well suited to everyone that signs up for that career field. Passing the bar is insanely difficult and even then, do you know how many half assed shitty lawyers there are out there roaming these streets? Crazy.

The stalking in this fandom is horrific, and if she really is dishing out details on how to stalk Austin's past social medias to obtain information, then they are certified crazy. It's giving straight jacket. It's giving delusional stalker. And to answer your question of how they can overlook what they say online...arrogance and ego, simply put. You think you're untouchable until one day you're not.

This point you bring up here about Austin and Kaia, dude, amazing. This needed to be said. You are so correct. Of course Austin is not a predator. Only fucking idiots would say that shit and compare him to Leo. This man clearly went through the ringer, and his choice in dating partner only reflects the mental state he was in (and might still be lingering in) at that time. He had a full fledged identity crisis meanwhile he flew to London straight after being released from the Hospital in Australia and filmed MOTA, then a few short months later he met Kaia under questionable circumstances. Plus the whirlwind of the award season and the hefty Elvis press tour is so much for a person to handle, especially when this was his first time doing both of those. No man or woman under normal circumstances would get mixed up with someone much younger than them (especially when the younger one hasn't even been a legal adult for that long). it's really a reflection of a switch not being turned on for the older person AND fucked up trauma somewhere in the young person. Trauma all around really.

At kaia's age, being with a man much older than her might have given the impression to others that she was so wise beyond her years, but she's a damn child. She shows her age all the time when she takes pictures with her young friends, go to these embarrassing parties that involve BDSM or sex or fanfiction readings in her "perverted bookclub". That is all stuff a 22 year old and younger would probably be found doing. That is not something a functioning adult who's doing okay would engage in. Plus, by her own admission she has been around men much older than he all her life thanks to Cindy pushing her to model since she was so young. So she is fucked up from that, and dating older men is what she is used to. She thinks it's normal. But in reality, it's not. And it's the fact that these shippers who are her age DON'T have a problem with it, but those of us who are close to Austin's age have a MASSIVE problem with it.

You're telling me that if theses shippers were to see a regular 32 year old man holding hands with a 22 year old out and about in the grocery store or whatever that they'd be cool with it? No, you side eye that shit. It is not normal or usual, it is odd. I as a near 30 year old woman would never in my life consider dating someone Kaia's age, are you for fucking real? In Hollywood this weirdo shit might be immorally normalized, but in regular society it is NOT OKAY. And I hope Austin get out of this funk he's been in for 2-3 years now. Continuing to be with her will only further damage himself in the long run, as you can clearly tell this man is not in love with her.

I think I hit on everything I wanted to comment on, but honestly I don't remember so im just gonna leave it here lol.

#lindsay's anon asks

[voxofthevoid]

So chapter 220 seems like it kind of threw out the theories that Kenjaku is interested in Yuuji at all now that he's not Sukuna's vessel. Or at least not his plans/interest in Yuuji doesn't involve Yuuji living. Kinda sad about this from the momjaku point of view, but do you think that we still might see any real momjaku interactions?

I'm absolutely holding out hope for Yuuji being traumatized in new and entertaining ways Mumjaku interactions. Please, Gege, feed us.

I wouldn't say Kenjaku implementing that rule about all CG players except themself and Megumikuna needing to die is particularly contradictory to how I view them and their interest in Yuuji. To be specific, I don't think Kenjaku's ever-changing plans were ever going to be kind to Yuuji, and straight-up death might honestly be gentler on the guy than anything that would've entailed him continuing to be Sukuna's vessel (or a cage, rather) while Kenjaku's plans march on. And, with the rules the protags added for saving Tsumiki, it's not implausible that Kenjaku could still keep Yuuji alive if they want, but that's just a theoretical possibility and not one I think the plot will head toward. Only that, if we're speculating on what Kenjaku's plans (if any) mean for Yuuji, the new rules they added to the CG don't necessarily mean intended filicide.

The thing is, I have no earthly idea what Kenjaku wants at the end of all this. Nothing that comes out of their mouth is trustworthy; they lie like breathing and cheerfully contradict themself. Their actions speak louder, but we still only know so much about them.

They're also not a plan-every-detail villain, like Aizen Sousuke from Bleach for instance. I'd say Kenjaku's greatest strength is their sheer adaptability.* Everything we've seen about them shows that they got so far by (a) using coincidental developments like the Star Plasma Vessel business to their advantage, (b) rolling with the punches to an insane degree, as in the battle with Yuki, and (c) pure fucking luck, also seen in the battle with Yuki.

I'm saying this because nothing about Yuuji's vesselhood implies Kenjaku had a great deal of control over how the whole thing unraveled. They seem to have made him to be a certain way, body and soul, and it's reasonable to assume it had to do with Sukuna, but (a) why, exactly and (b) is it only about Sukuna? Kenjaku says they intend for Yuuji to coexist with Sukuna, and they seem to have a part to play in Yuuji being more cage than vessel, but when Sukuna hops to Megumi and starts running around being his menace self, Kenjaku doesn't even bat an eye. It's further evidence of the aforementioned adaptability, but it also raises the question of what exactly they did to Yuuji, why, and if there's more to it than what we've seen so far.

In sum (I'm sorry, anon, I cannot be concise to save my life), it could be that Kenjaku has lost interest in Yuuji, but it could also be that they have further plans. They could also simply be interested in seeing what he makes of himself; that would be in line with their general approach to things. We really need those Mumjaku interactions—for science.

Thanks for asking this! I had fun hashing out my thoughts on the whole thing.

* I was going to say Yuuji seems to have inherited that from them, but then I remembered that Jin saw his dead wife come back to life with stitches on her forehead and axe-murderer eyes and decided to make a baby with her. Congratulations, Yuuji, both your parents are batshit.

#anon #i love my anons #itadori yuuji #kenjaku #jjk 220 #jjk #my desire to see Yuuji happy is at constant war with my desire to see him in interesting (read: traumatizing) situations

[system-of-a-feather]

DISCLAIMER SECTION

I'm gonna ramble about race / cultural experiences and trauma (probably) and this time it really isn't a line of thought ignited by syscourse or anything - but I'll tag it's tw anyways cause I'd rather people be able to filter it out than get it out there, but anyways

(for the note this was actually spurred on from a number of conversations I was having with a few parts today at work, one of which being that post about "diagnosed early vs diagnosed late" trauma; none of these points necessarily reply to that but for transparency and context)

For all of this, if any points or topics relate or resonate with you, feel free to comment, reblog, discuss, whatever on this post. Theres a lot of trauma talk on this and some level of details (CW will be provided before each section along with CW: clears), but none of this is really intended as a vent or trauma dump as much as... ya know, just talking about it as it is.

--------

As we've gotten further and further along with our healing, we've come to be a lot more open and comfortable talking about topics specifically relating to our trauma - at least in a C-PTSD / paranoid about giving out things that can be used to hurt us sense - and that is honestly really great and I'm really happy and proud for that

The thing is though, even though we've mostly declawed how easily our main triggers can be poked at and thus enabled us to feel more confident and ok talking about it, we honestly still are hesitant to do so for two main reasons.

One, being a simple lack of motivation to do so as it doesn't really come up and we don't really think about it more than we have to and often when we have to its usually not a place of mind we have the spoons to talk about it - ya know, normal healthy things.

The second though is because we've really come to learn that a lot of people in online trauma and dissociative communities really don't understand a lot of the largest and foundational themes of the trauma we went through and in my experience in the community, more often than not the response I've gotten from sharing that sort of things have always been more uncomfortable at best than helpful or positive.

And I think there are like... maybe three main things about our childhood core trauma that just make it hard to talk about with the tone of the community + the general heavily white area. This isn't meant to be like "oh you are bad if you fall into this" or anything, I don't have any ill intent or "call out" to really anyone even those who might heavily contribute to this cause its not that much talked on afaik. Mostly talking about this in a sort of, I guess commentary? I dunno, food for thought I guess.

But the first area...

as you might expect from this post and some previous ones, is that due to the fact that the community is heavily white-person run and driven and filled with many white peers, a lot of the talk and understanding of "trauma" and what kind of "chronic childhood trauma" typically looks like to form DID is informed by a white and western standard of trauma. And that isn't to say it is WRONG or BAD, but it makes it so that there is an inherent understanding that anything that differs from that is typically "better" rather than looking at the differences in a large scale cultural-context lens. And this sort of stuff has on MULTIPLE occasions had people respond to me venting or sighing about trauma-related stuff and stating that they wish they had that growing up - which I absolutely understand but it is OBVIOUSLY intensely insensitive and lacking in insight. I don't think any of those people who made those comments MEANT bad, but the nature of the discussion of trauma in these spaces being so heavily white centric and run has made it so that people forget to take culture into account and over simplify trauma into this "A is bad and B is - even when bad as well - inherently better". There is probably a level of classism / assumptions based on class as well somewhere in there, but thats a line of thought I hadn't thought much on past just a "yeah that probably plays a role".

(CW: RAMCOA related topics, CSA, etc)

The second...

is that our relationship with our sister falls awkwardly into the "not programming" in the sense of it's scale and intensity, but it would also be incredibly understated to just call it "conditioning" either and this might just be a "my feelings" on the matter than an actual reflection of the community, but I do often feel as though the nature of it not being either would result in it either being minimized OR people assuming I am trying to claim that I have the same thing as those that experienced programming and its just a really awkward place to be in. There is a lot of black and white talk regarding psychological abuse perpetuated by a person in power who has knowledge of DID and toyed with you as an experiment and project by intentionally learning to manipulate the parts. It wasn't at all the same level of proper RAMCOA, but it also was not just "conditioned learning" as our dissociation was actively targeted as a mechanism to create an unquestioning pet - that of which ended off getting pettled off to the a pedophile.

The complexity and nuances of the trauma and relationship we had with our sister like that combined with the very black and white language regarding trauma talk of that kind has made it just really awkward to try to explain to people because its really not either but as far as I know there isn't a term for whatever it was either. While chatting with a part (forgot which honestly whoops) we were thinking of officially just making our own term of like "trained" but idk, we aren't the coining type of folk so *shrugs*

(CW: CLEARED)

The third area...

Is just how messy and black and white the talk around autism. To those that haven't followed this blog from the earliest of early days, it might seem as though we were recently diagnosed with autism (technically true) and thats it and all, but autism has been a HUGELY prevalent part of our childhood and trauma history and honestly none of it really fits into the common narratives in PTSD / CDD spaces.

Firstly, we were neither really "early diagnosed" OR "late diagnosed" as our parents and my oldest sister (who was early diagnosed) noticed it EARLY on and immediately shaped my entire life around my "Aspergers" diagnosis that I was told I had when I actually never saw a professional for. Regardless, to my knowledge, I was diagnosed with aspergers from age 4 until they changed it to ASD and I asked my mom about it again at 15 or 16 when I started seeing a therapist and found out she never actually had me formally diagnosed. I then became "undiagnosable" due to the disorders that they COULD confirm, plus the weird relationship with my sister, and that I was raised in a "heavily autistic environment" where it was very plausible that I simply learned autistic behaviors as - at the time, thank you DID - I was too high functioning / masking and didn't appear to have significant impairment in any other areas other than being "a bit weird" in terms of how I view society and behavior again, both of which could be accounted for by environment + C-PTSD. It wasn't until well after I cleared stabilization for DID and undid a lot of the intense training our sister put us through, did our masking drastically decrease and it became apparent that yeah, we actually are largely impacted by ASD which ended up with us in the last few months being diagnosed. We were diagnosed early, undiagnosed, labeled "can not confirm nor deny if this is ASD", then diagnosed late, all simultaneously and so we don't really know where our word would fall in the general pecking order of "which group does your experiences fall into".

The OTHER thing is that our two primary abusers were autistic and their autism WAS inherently a part of the trauma that we went through and a lot of the talk of autism on the internet is so 'low supports needs' centric and sugar coated that it is very hard to feel comfortable commenting on how actually ugly and harmful autism can be to the individual AND those around them. This isn't to say its Autistic Abuse or any of that garbage, but my abusers autism is not a negligible or coincidental aspect of their abuse. It didn't make them an abuser, but it was still a large part of it.

(CW: Physical abuse and neglect)

My dad is confusing for 5000 reasons and anyone whose had DMs with me for over a year will know I sometimes share some of the REALLY confusing things about my dad (pretty sure he has DID as well but thats a conspiracy theory), but between his cultural trauma, coming from a """third world""" country, and having missed out on certain learning targets growing up due to the aforementioned first two - he has never been given the information, coping skills, treatment, or context to handle his symptoms in anything close to a healthy way. Its only now that hes (I think) in his 60s that my mom got a better understanding of everything that he's gotten any support, but with the sheer lack of assistance in his childhood, teenage years, and adulthood, its both a large task and honestly arguably not fair on him to try to get him to understand it beyond what is necessary to give him a life worth living.

But again, he had no ability and no tools to navigate his symptoms due to his complex and unfortunate situation and he absolutely did the best he could with what he had. Some parts in the system don't forgive him, but almost all of them understand and respect the intent at least. For example, we were poorly fed (and when we were it was usually garbage; think KFC 5/7 days a week for dinner) until we were 16 and able to drag the family into actually cooking because my dad would get into violent and aggressive meltdowns over ANY food smells, ANY mess, and ANY warmth. Cooking was basically forbidden until then because everyone was too afraid to risk it. Like there is a lot more to that, but its not something I'm given as clear access to and I aint gonna pry, but most of the most abusive behavior from him could very much be stemmed down to a sensory or communication issue regarding his untreated autism and a lack of ability to cope with it resulting in violent meltdowns.

(CW: CLEARED)

(CW: ABA)

Likewise, my sister who had been given ABA, from a young age taught me "how to survive in the world as an autistic person" and directly passed on HER version of ABA and HER understanding of autism onto me, which was just a garbage, intentional or not, way to excuse making me into her pet project rather than actually coping with her own trauma. (Plus 95% of the "information" she "taught" me was garbage including the infamous "having multiple consciousnesses in your head is a normal autism thing as long as there are less than 5" that I clown on every other day)

(CW: CLEARED)

I dunno really how to wrap this up, its like a conglomeration of thoughts we had today so its not really well organized but like... I guess AHEM *puts on my highschool english essay hat*

And so I conclude my essay on *checks notes* reasons I feel weird talking about trauma in online spaces? I think thats the point of this post? Idk I'm just rambling XD

#alter: riku #riku rambles #long post #trauma talk #syscourse tw #aba tw #physical abuse tw #neglect tw #ramcoa cw #cw ramcoa #psychological abuse tw #csa tw

[blackjackkent]

Time to party with the tieflings!

We have a new camp location - no longer in the ruins but somewhere out on the road, and there is nice music playing. c: This is nice.

Time for more social interaction!

Rather concerningly, the first thing I notice is this, lying on a table in a side tent:

????

There's no indication of who it belongs to and no option to follow up on it. This seems...like something we should be more concerned about. Hopefully Zevlor hasn't been putting a massive trick over on us this whole time.

Anyway, onwards...

The tieflings are all very happy and very drunk, and it's cute. They're being nice to Hector too and it's really doing a lot to brighten his mood; after everything that happened in the temple he was starting to feel way out of his depth, but this - he helped these people. That means something. A bard tiefling offered to write a song about him but Hector dissuaded her; so far he's proved very uninterested in being memorialized.

Companion circuit, starting with Halsin:

"Go on now. Don't waste a night like this talking to me. We'll discuss your problem tomorrow."

Poor Halsin is still covered in goblin blood.

The game (perhaps left over from the early access, when I believe Halsin was not a companion option but just a dude you could help and also flirt with) mostly only gave options to be super direct - "There's other things we could do besides talking..." - and even when I thought I was saying I just wanted to get to know him it ended up turning out that Hector was trying to come onto him. I think we can all safely assume Hector is not at that point yet. So I had to reload this conversation a few times. :P

"Take your own advice, why don't you? Go on - mingle a little."

"Later, perhaps. Don't worry about me. A night under the stars amidst nature's creation is just what I need after being locked up in the goblins' dungeon. Go on. Enjoy yourself. Seek out some wine before it runs dry - there are a lot of thirsty people around here."

---

Wyll, apparently, has been sort of lurking off to the side of the party.

He's depressed because, no matter what we did to help these tieflings, they're still going to be in danger because of Karlach and other monsters of the world. Hector didn't necessarily disagree, but tried to cheer him up a bit, which did seem to work.

(It seems as if all these conversations might be the initial entrance point for romance, because Hector had the option to ask Wyll to dance. Hopefully I'm not cutting myself out of anything by not taking any of these options right now.)

---

Gale...uh. offered to show us something magical.

Hector, assuming he meant some spell, agreed. "I like the sound of 'magical'. What do you have planned?

"A lesson. And trust me when I say - few have experienced the pleasure I offer to teach. However, it's something best experienced in more...intimate surrounds, once the revelry has ended and the stillness of the night has been restored."

Um. What did I just agree to?

I am legitimately unsure whether this was flirtatious or if Gale is ACTUALLY talking about some magic ability. Given Hector's general lack of facility with the nuances of conversation, I think he is taking this completely at face value. I almost reloaded, but you know what, we're going to lean into it. Come the end of the night, we'll see what was actually intended, I guess.

---

Astarion is not having a good time:

"You know, I never pictured myself as a hero. Never thought I'd be the one they toast for saving so many lives. And now that I'm here..."

"...I hate it. This is awful."

Hector, in spite of himself, grins. "You did a good thing," he says, lounging back on his heels. "Suck it up and enjoy yourself."

"Enjoy myself?! There's a worm in my brain, I'm surrounded by idiots, and all I've got to drink is wine that tastes like vinegar."

"Relax, all your problems will still be there in the morning."

"That means I have to survive tonight. And this party. All I want is a little fun - is that so much to ask?"

"That had better not mean 'I want to kill something'."

"Not at all! I was hoping for companionship and - well, maybe a little death. Figuratively speaking."

"Not with you, just to be clear. I mean...can you imagine? Ugh. No."

Lmao. God. I really went into this game being like "I am sure Astarion's fine but I don't imagine I will get the MASSIVE hype around him" but you know what. This is a great character. His dialogue has so much personality, his voice acting is on point, he should be completely insufferable but I am grinning every time I talk to him, and even with the scraggly hair which is not normally my thing, that jawline does wonders for his attractiveness. Even Hector doesn't seem to fully dislike him and by all accounts he really should.

And there's most definitely more lurking under the devil-may-care facade. I am 100% romancing him on a different playthrough.

For now, though, Hector will be satisfied with making sure he stays in camp and doesn't go completely off the rails.

---

Oh my god. Moving on to Lae'zel, who is looking at Hector with an entirely new expression that resembles nothing so much as a dog staring down a piece of meat.

"I have seen the kith'raki tear a screaming neogi's legs from its belly to fashion into blades. Yet they could not match your nerve today. It was enough to drive me to madness."

"A pity for us you have promised your body to Gale. I've no doubt he is as seductive as he is succinct."

:LKJSD;fljkaS;LDKJFAPOSIHDFPOAISJDFPAOISJDFPOIASJDFPOAISJDPFOJIE WHAT

Okay first of all - Hector is all O.O because he seriously thought Gale was going to show him a magic trick. Second of all - you weren't even THERE while Hector was showing all this nerve. Third of all - we have GOT to get you a better outfit to have these conversations in. And fourth - a;lsikjdf;aslokjdf;paolsdikjf;ap.

Help. My face hurts.

Hector, as awkwardly as humanly possible, squeaks out, "I"m grateful for your aid. You really are a gifted warrior."

She sneers at him. "Vlaakith demands of me no less." Her eyes sweep over him and a twitch of frustration tugs a muscle in her jaw. "Mm. If only I might lay claim to my proper trophy. Come morning, you will wonder. You will wonder how my lips might have tasted. How my fingers on your skin might have felt. Oh, but do enjoy yourself this night. I intend to, myself. Wyll looks particularly tempting."

a;lskjdf;alsdjkf;alsjdf;asldkjfds;sjd MA'AM?!?!?!?

Hector staggers away from this conversation feeling a little dazed, his skin about four shades darker, and not sure how to meet anyone's eyes.

---

Shadowheart is kneeling in apparent prayer in a completely different part of the map, way off from the party. She may be a Shar cleric and he's not sure how to talk to her, but at least it's quiet over here.

She smirks slightly, looking up at him, and raises a glass of wine from where it's sitting at her side.

"Everyone seems to be in high spirits. I saw you with Gale. You two looked...cozy. Far be it from me to judge. Blood must still be running a little hot, after everything."

Oh my god. Apparently EVERYONE except Hector knew what was going on in that conversation. Poor boy is definitely BRIGHT red now and flustered as hell.

They actually had a nice little conversation - Shadowheart talked about how she wouldn't have expected to care about the refugees (and Shar wouldn't approve of anything that distracted from her worship). And Hector had a drink with her.

"There - some liquid courage. And try to get some rest too if you can; tomorrow's another day."

#bjk plays baldur's gate 3 #hector carlisle #lolololololololololl oh my god this did NOT go the way I expected it to #i am fucking dying #poor confused hector #i'm leaning into it but omg #also this is incredibly long and i'm not apologizing for it anymore :P

[ranboo5]

Ooh, you mentioned c!Techno — any c!peerpresurduo headcanons? I may or may not be a bit obsessed with them :)

REAL AND ALWAYS TBH CPEERPRESS THE WORLDDDDD when I was more I active I was fully a cpeerpress blog at heart tbh and I like to think in essence I still am... they really are all that matters. Under cut for. Oh my god I was worried I wasn't gonna be able to deliver but THEMMMM

Headcanons wise I'm not gr8 at dragging up novel stuff on the spot BUT . I do like to think wrt offscreen interactions - I laruve cRanboo litol Hypixel backstory . The fashion thing is extremely covered ground but I do thing they discuss also specifically the angle of like . OK so going off Techno's skin Ranboo's skin and hell even applying it to Squid's tuxedo I like 2 think that fictional Hypixel fashion sense/movements just kind of are like that (see: Myzzy design!!!) so I think they should trash on people's wardrobes. - Idr if I ever posted this but it's fine. Philza being the kind of guy he is definitely has some kind of preserved:tm: cellar and he among other things at one point gets into keeping a ginger bug. He produces a decent amount of pumpkin sodie using the farm and the bug and ofc his store is officially open to both of the other commune denizens, which they both do interpret as an "at all times" thing. Which it is, even if Phil didn't necessarily intend to get woken up by the world's unstealthiest insomniacs walking into his house in the dead of night in search of a carbonated drink - I don't know if they run across each other during this or if it's during an excursion of some kind but I have the image in my mind so strongly that at one point in conversation Ranboo as like a haha yeah semi-sequitur just drops an episode of The Horrors as like . It's not Quite a litmus test but it's there, both spontaneous and dragged out like pulling teeth somehow, and even someone more astute than Techno wouldn't have a clue what to do with it. Fortunately, Technoblade, being greatly socially competent at Chilling and Having Fun, takes only a second before going "oh yea. HATE it when that happens." I don't know what the Horrors being obliquely referenced in just enough graphic detail to be unsettling while also deeply useless in figuring anything out are so I also don't know if Techno knows how it feels:tm: or not odds are strong either way tbh but regardless of that he DOES say "oh yea. HATE it when that happens" - on a lighter note one day Techno gets sick for an excursion and fervently denies this, which Ranboo dutifully yes-ands while also handing Techno tissues every five minutes - Ranboo once explained the cobblestone decisions made about the sky city EXTENSIVELY to Techno, and in this explanation also never got around to mentioning what they were building or why. Techno didn't ask. - Techno successfully taught Ranboo at least one recipe that he did not know prior to teaching it as if he'd known it for years. If this happened multiple times it has a roughly 50-60% success rate wrt making things that are good - I think it does matter that during and leading up 2 Ho16 proper Ranboo was not in contact w/ people at the commune . After it respawns somewhere locally it takes off in disgust as soon as it can, makes for the mangled desert, falls asleep in an alcove of sandstone somewhere and is awoken when a wandering enderman chances upon the sand it's walled off with, and before it can say anything they ask Ranboo if it's lost. The question pulls him up short and he finds himself saying something like "a little bit, I guess," and the language isn't as clumsy in their mouth as it was last month and a nondescript memory of talking at Phil slowly clicks into focus Techno is dealing w/ his Distraction Of The Week when Ranboo walks back into the commune -- this week he's reading about bead recording and is trying to figure out if and how to apply this to Syndicate signaling. It's not going great. Anyway the snow rustles and Ranboo clambers awkwardly over the fence across the yard, and when Techno throws him the "sup" he just stops mid path to his house and walking circles into the snow explains that he is going to bed which manages to start a ten-minute conversation about nothing that lasts until Ranboo attempts to lean on a fencepost in fidgeting and nearly passes out asleep on the spot, in similar kind to when you pop into a Discord call for "just a minute before bed"

[dandylovesturtles]

fanfic ask game for you

❤✨🚀🦈

ok the first part of this ask is showing as a black heart for me but I couldn't find a black heart in the list (I may just be dumb), and I already did the red heart so I'll answer the yellow heart.

💛 What is the most impactful lesson you’ve learned about writing?

Honestly, that there's no one right way to do it.

When you're starting out, a lot of writing advice you get is heavy on "don't do this, don't do that" and everyone has their own opinions on how much you should do of X Y Z. But then if you go back even a few decades of writing, everything is different, and just like fashion, writing trends come in and out of style.

There is a bit of "know the rules to break them" here, of course. Like, one common piece of writing advice is not to use adverbs. Usually this advice is given because new writers have a tendency to overuse adverbs, and there are a lot of places where adverbs are unnecessary and weaken your writing. A phrase like "ran quickly" is a great example. Running is already intended to be quick, at least relative to walking and jogging, so saying that the running is quick is redundant and doesn't give any additional information to the reader. If you're trying to indicate that a character is moving even faster than their normal running speed, there are stronger verbs for that, like "sprinted" or "dashed".

But on the flip side, a phrase like "walked quickly" is fine. Walking is slower compared to jogging and running, but it's also a very distinct action from jogging and running, and we don't have a lot of words in English to convey "walking but faster than normal" ("quickstepped" is the only one I can think of off the top of my head and that's literally just saying stepping quickly and also I usually think of a quickstep as like, covering just a few feet, not going down a hallway). So I would say this is a good time to use an adverb.

There's lots of writing advice out there. I don't necessarily want to say "ignore it and do what you want" (I mean, you can though, no one is stopping you), but it's good when thinking about writing advice to understand what it really means, how it applies, and whether it fits into your style, and then regard or discard it appropriately.

✨️ Out of the comments you’ve received on your fics, what are two or three of your favorites?

impossible to pick specific comments I think, so I'll just hit on some of the general types of comments I get that I really like:

comments that call out specific lines or sections of the fic they enjoyed

comments where people are theorizing what will happen next

all of the comments on chapter 8 of IMBI that were just some variation of "he said the thing"

all the comments on chapter 8 of IMBI worried about Donnie (I just thought it was really funny that Raph got sound back and 75% of the comments I was getting were "oh no Donnie :c" lol)

people who comment some variation of "the title of this fic made me think it was going to be a comedy" lol

people who say I made them laugh <3

and a big shout out to all the people who have commented on Sidelined fics or who have sent me asks about it who are themselves disabled and are happy to see the AU and who have given me lots of tips and things to think about as I go along writing it ^^

🚀 Do you like to outline your fic first or create as you go?

Occasionally I do a little outlining but for the most part I just create as I go. It's partly because once I outline the fic then I usually feel too constrained by it and also it makes me kinda bored lol. Like I got some version of the story out of my system so now I don't want to do it.

aaaand I already answered the fish question

Thanks for the ask!

#writer ask game

[redbreastedbird]

I wanted to ask someone who knows more the inside of writing and publishing, so here's a question

I've been beginning to write a novel, and with that comes planning where the whole story will go, and I've been worrying about planning past book one.

I know that when you found the publisher for MMU the original contract was for three books, and then later three more and three after that.

The idea that is forming in my head about my series would be much longer than a trilogy and I've been worrying about maybe reworking my ideas so in case there's satisfying endings both at the end of book 1 (in this case eliminating every possible reference to this being the first event but not the last) and book 3 in case whoever I will publish with doesn't want to go with the sheer number of books I have in mind.

Would you say that's a good idea or just over worrying?

Thank you in advance for the advice, without your books I wouldn't be the person I am now

Hello, and thank you!

This is a tough question to answer, because it’ll really depend on a lot of things outside your control!

When I wrote MMU I imagined it as a single standalone book. But when I found an agent for it, she suggested that it might actually be the beginning of a series. So she helped me write a synopsis for several future books (honestly I think it was something incredibly simple like ‘Daisy and Hazel solve a murder at a country house; Daisy and Hazel solve a murder on the Orient Express; Daisy and Hazel solve a murder in Egypt’ and so on) and that’s what we took to publishers along with the first finished manuscript.

My publisher bought three books, so I knew I’d be able to write at least two more D&H stories. I remember choosing Orient Express as book 3 and thinking ‘this is the story I have to write, I don’t want to lose out on it if this is all I get’. I knew very clearly that if the series didn’t do well (and we weren’t expecting it to!) I’d only ever write three books, so I had to make sure that the series stood as a three book set, and each book stood alone.

But, of course, it did do well, and so I ended up writing a lot more stories than I’d ever originally intended, and creating series arcs that were a lot more long-lasting and nuanced than I thought I’d be able to. I never thought I’d write Daisy’s coming out plot, I never thought Hazel’s little sisters would ever even appear, I never thought I’d actually get to send them to Egypt …

All this is to say that the length of a series isn’t just shaped by what an author wants, it’s shaped by the publisher and the market and how well that series does. I have been lucky in that I always imagined each book as its own adventure, not necessarily part of a larger story. Some authors, of course, come up with intricate three, four or five part stories, often more books than they have a deal for - I know an author who went into being published with a seven part series plot and (I think?) only a 3 book deal. Publishers usually do 2 or 3 book deals at first, so if you’ve got a clear idea for a trilogy or a duology then you’re in.

But of course, what those authors do is have plans for many different scenarios! There’s no reason why you can’t subtly seed something in an earlier book that you can pick up if you do get more books. For example, I mention Hazel’s younger sisters and family repeatedly in the first books, even though they only become important in book 7. If I had never gone beyond 3 books the mentions would still be fine, but since I did, readers can see those early mentions and connect them to the Rose and May they know!

Plan the series you want to plan, write the book you want to write and then game various different scenarios if and when you come to sell it. Can the series work with only one, two or three books? How can you make a satisfying story with three parts that can then expand out if you do get a deal for more titles? It’s always sensible to be able to be flexible - publishers do get nervous when someone comes in and announces that this series has to be 12 books - but if you’re able to suggest different options you may end up writing those twelve books anyway, just across four or five deals!

Good luck! And do remember - it’s useful to think about the market, and be aware of the challenges you’ll face, but the best books are written with only you, the author, in mind. If you bend to other people during the first drafts you’ll lose some of the joy of creating a world, so always write for yourself first. The rest of the world can come later!

#murder most unladylike #robin stevens #writing #author life #publishing

[lokilysolbitch]

My new fixation is bad poetry

and its making me think about how to define art and poetry and what makes poetry good etc but I can't go back and find my sophomore english teacher and rant about it so I'm making it yalls problem. but mr c if ur in here pls read also what do you mean thats one way to skin a hamster. thats not how it goes what are you talking abou

first of all, ive finally figured out my current definition of art: records of the human experience or just experience in general. so yes paintings and poetry but ALSO tiktoks or a decorated room. idc if you think its stupid there are remnants and references to human experiences ALL OVER those. so basically if it left a mark at any point, its art. maybe not always "good" or skilled, deep, etc but it is art (to me)

secondly, what is poetry? the same sophomore english teacher asked this at the beginning of a unit and the class was struggling. every time we listed a requirement for poetry he went "is that necessary though?". "it has to rhyme" "does it?" "it has to be deep" "does it" "it needs to have words!" ".....does it?" man idk i was 15 and sleep deprived

but now im less sleep deprived and i have an answer. I would consider poetry a spectrum (but not necessarily flexible. i wouldn't say you have to bend it's meaning to make something fit) but also playing with language, to be playful with it and have fun with it, to use it as a toy in a way. using language in a way different from its intended use. so writing a personal narrative about a deep topic? not poetry. maybe you had fun with it but thats still its main use. to make words rhyme, to alliterate, to use words just plain wrong? probably poetry. its still a spectrum. and im aware this means that saying something like "yew nork/glass fork" would count as a shitpost and poetry while "Ill love you and ill never stop loving you" doesnt and um i dont care i said what i said--

this would also mean most books and speeches would have little bits of poetry in there and i stand by that too. maybe the entire thing isnt poetry but bits of it could count. i came to this conclusion on the meaning of poetry because i saw too many "aesthetic" free verse poems that were just. tweets. you coulda just made it a sentence and posted it for free. there was no attempt to play with language. you just used it the way you were supposed to. its just a quote.

im definitely going to add more onto this about what i think poetry critics miss sometimes and why formal teaching of poetry is flawed but not all in one post bc its a lot. However i have one last concept to attempt to define. this one has always made me the angriest

GOOD VS BAD POETRY/ART

where do i even start. maybe we should just get rid of these terms completely and make people say what they mean. is it good or did he just use literary devices correctly. is it good or is it genuine. is it good or is it deep. is it good or is it entertaining. is it good or do you like it. is it good or is it popular. is it good or is it complex. is it good or is it creative.

ive been saying since i was i was maybe 12-13 that even though good does not have a solid stable meaning, there is still a sense of what good is. We know what its supposed to be. classical music, Edgar Allen Poe, Da Vinci are good. sure most people barely know or understand or care about these things other than one piece of work they can recall because they had to look at it in highschool that time and the teacher seemed to appreciate it. and we know that reality tv, messily hand drawn animals, and half assed near unintelligible tiktok skits are bad.

but....wait we like those though

ive come to the conclusion that while still shifting, "good"'s meaning in scholarly settings tends to come down to whatever those somethingth century european dudes and what the modern smart looking guys deemed intelligent. and in colloquial settings, what everyone likes.

many pretentious types will say rap is bad and the subject matter is crude and the same way im sure some old european guy would have said or has said traditional african music is too weird and primitive to be respectable.

now. i dont really listen to rap intentionally. if its in there its in there. I used to be pretentious and after changing i just never got too deep into it BUT. i listened to a Nicki Minaj song one time just to see and yeah it was not family friendly but dear god was it clever. the way she'd drop the most genius alliteration-personification-allegory-englishvocabword and then just keep it moving like im not gonna have to stop and ponder the seven layer reference to bedtime hanky panky. its smart. its creative. its complex. and so many rappers can write about the same topics over and over and still come back with a new way of phrasing it. its genuinely impressive

but so many still wouldn't consider it good.

the term good when it comes to art, while having somewhat of a meaning is still useless. make your own personal standards for what is important for you to see in art. its kind of silly for us to collectively decide "okay this art? we like it. this is good" and then go to a different community (age group, culture, race) and go "were going to show you the new gold standard for good! its what we liked! you dont do it like this?? then yours is bad!". historically thats never been a good move

what i find important with poetry (and by poetry i mostly mean song writing bc i dont even read poetry like that) tends to be "is it a poem? or a sentence/paragraph". everything other than that just has to do with my taste and what I prefer in the moment. and it goes the same for everyone else. there's no universal good or bad with art. its just what a dominant or culturally respected group of people said was important.

limericks are bad tho jesus told me/j

TL;DR: i think anything that records an experience is art. i think toying with language mostly makes it poetry, and i think its weird people create little boxes for good and bad and make everyone else adhere to it

#poetry #poetrycritic #creative writing #formalapollooffering #instagrampoetry #instapoetry #art #philosophy #songwriting #bad poetry #rap #writing analysis #literature #ididntproofreadthis #infodump #hyperfixation #adhd #literary device #handmadeorganicpost